#i think ive lost control LMFAO

[cappucosmic]

lmfao i uh. i usually have 5 wips going at a time but i think i've officially lost control lmfao

[orcelito]

Had my first ever papsmear and that was #Uncomfortable but it's important to my health so I did it anyways

Being a responsible adult is hard 😑

[melancholysway]

TMNT Headcanons: Toxic Traits

Because they're not all rainbows and butterflies bro and IVE BEEN WAITING TO DO THIS WHY AM I SO EXCITED TO BE WRITING TOXIC TRAITS ABOUT THE GUYS LMAO

Also I'm thinking of 2003/2007/bayverse when I'm typing these LMAO

Leonardo

lowkey a control freak

since he's used to being in charge, he tries that in the relationship. Like, if you both want to hang out in the lair or anywhere in the city together, he makes it to where you sort of don't have a say where you go if that makes sense?

Loves his alone time a little too much

Like he won't answer a text or call because he's doing his own thing

This one is justified since he's always doing something with the team, but he sometimes gets so caught up and a whole day will go by without a word from him

Does not sugarcoat SHIT. He forgets to be gentle in times that you may be weak- he's more of a "well, do it then," kind of guy. If you come upset at him because you lost your job or got yelled at at work, expect him to say "then leave, it's not good for you to stay at a job like that." He'll say this, OFTEN. Especially if you come to him with the same issue, OFTEN.

Also that, don't complain about the same shit to him, he's gonna tell you straight up to do something about it instead of constantly complaining about it (IF it's something you can fix, this doesn't apply to really personal sensitive topics you can't control, i mean things you CAN control, like, your friends, job, clothes, etc,)

Raphael

even though raph is like my favorite attractive wise, I'd rather be friends with him LMFAO, why you may ask?

Raph is the PETTY KING.

Will intentionally ignore you if you do something to annoy him

He's so fucking petty bro, it's painful

holds grudges, it goes hand and hand with the pettiness, because in an argument he'll bring up shit that happened like

weeks ago.

I also hc he's an aries, and as an aries, we take everything to heart. We'll take what you say a bunch of different ways

We're also VERY hard headed, and don't care about anyone's opinions but our own, since we're really independent.

So, avoid giving him advice unless he ASKS.

He's independent, so, he likes his space. not that it's a bad thing, but if you're super clingy, yeah, he's gonna break up with you real fast LMAO

Cannot apologize for shit

Like, don't expect him to flat out say he's sorry? maybe a small "my fault," but really, don't expect him to say those two simple words

Donatello

This mf cannot admit when he's wrong. When you're dealing with someone as smart as Donnie, he often thinks that his answers are always right.

He'd rather die than admit he's wrong lowkey, because his genius and IQ is something that's unmatched, and to actually be wrong for once? yeah, no

sometimes you have to step up and check Donnie, because there will literally be times he's wrong and doesn't see it

Donnie hates hates HATES arguing. Any statement you make about him or the relationship that appears argumentative, he'll turn down immediately just to not argue, even if you weren't trying to and it was a harmless statement.

Don't ask this man to repeat anything for you more than once, he will not do it. He just doesn't have the strength to waste his breath when he was loud enough the first time

Michelangelo

Remember when I was talking about clinginess? Mikey is clingy as fuck

It's because he wants to be around you all the time, wants to be with you 24/7, that stuff.

It's sweet at first, but if you don't ask for space, he's seriously going to be following you like a dog everywhere i swear bro

Jealous of you, like the life you have. He wishes he could be human all the time, I don't know, he's jealous of the opportunities you have

Doesn't know when to be serious

Like yes his jokes are funny, but when you come upset seeking for an understanding boyfriend, he tries to make it funny, it comes from a good place, but it doesn't help

Doesn't know when to be serious but then gets pressed when you seek for advice from his brothers? like bro? just try not to make a joke while Y/n's talking about their problems?

Out of all toxic traits, Mikey's pisses me of the most- I'm kind of like Raph, I hate clingy ass people or guys, it kills the mood and makes me not want them anymore it sounds bad but like

oops? sorrynotsorry?

Taglist:

@bee-1n-space Masterlist

[blkkizzat]

Kalliiiiiiii I just want you to know that...IRL I'm tryna write a novel and every time I send you a saucy anonymous ask with my overgrown thoughts it's so that they don't bother me while I write. That being said...

I been thinking.

Gojo pulling a Choso and getting so fucking carried away mid fuck the first tome you let him hit it raw. Like Going from praising how good you feel while you're on top to flipping your ass over unable to stop. Like the man has lost a marble. He was letting you take the lead for once but then he felt you and you were heaven and now he can't stop no matter how much he wanted to let you take the lead. And when he's done he just lays down on top of you. Is he crushing you? A little. But he at least moved so his head was on your chest instead of in your face. And does he plan on getting up? No. He's gonna stay like that til he's hard again so he can fuck you again. Is it wise? No. Because neither of you are ready for kids, and if he doesn't get up to let you take your fucking birth control soon he's gonna give you a baby, but atp he's like...fuck it we ball (or to be more accurate fuck it, we balls deep). Shit, he's naming your kid in his head now. Gotta make sure the names go together. -🧠

(ah sorry i didnt get the notif for this, tumblr been flagging, removing and blocking my fics from tags so ive been stresssssed)

Hi 🧠 nonny!! Omg, what genre novel you writing?? Thats amazing! Jelly of people who can think of their own great original characters. I can only think of situations I want to see existing characters in LOL.

Please, please, please, give me ALL your horny thots.

LMFAO! He totally would loose his entire fucking mind going in raw. Him and Choso are the worst pussy drunk fhsjdfhsks.

Not him staying inside until he's hard again... this man gonna be the death of us.

"WE BALL—WE BALLS DEEP" FHDFIAHFDAKHDJFKDJHFKSD FHJKSFJDHSKFJDHSKDF!!! UR TOO FUNNY IM CRACKING UP!

Little does that man know the "birth control" i take is a placebo. I'm having his babies!! (then, leaving him and going back to toji so we can live off the child support rjfhdksjhvsdkfjhvs)

This was yummmmmyyyyy 🧠 pookies.

[strifespecibi]

Like domino's pizza? Also what the fuck is cablepool?

so okay. for reference, cable aka nathan summers is this time-traveller who was born many years in the future in a dystopic society. his goal was to hop around and prevent that future from happening. he ended up joining the xmen and yadda yadda, rest is history. domino is his on-again off-again love interest and deadpool is his partner. i'll get to it in a moment

so dominos power is being able to control luck. no, really. she gives her opponents bad luck and in turn gives herself good luck. it is (from the wiki) "…largely participatory - in order for the luck to take effect, domino herself must engage in an action whose chance she can affect. for example, if domino were to stand before a hail of bullets, she would be shot. instead, she must take action; in attempting to avoid the gunfire, she will miraculously bob and weave just right to avoid every single shot." which is SO interesting on its own to pull vriska analysis from. also, one kind of funny note about her design is that her right eye is surrounded by black in the shape of an eyepatch! that eye also glows sometimes. so you see why i think she was the inspiration for vriska. there's also a lot of similarities with her backstory and personality but i'm not a domino scholar and i don't wanna mischaracterize her here so all i can say is if you want to know more about her and how she inspired vriska, check the wiki lmfao

picture of domino for clarity

so now lets wrap around to cablepool, the best example of nicieza yaoi this side of the mississippi. i will be perfectly honest this one isnt even subtext its just canon. they quite literally went to intercourse pennsylvania together. you can watch this amv for examples of what their dynamic is like ive been entranced by it for all of today. also this one because its really funny. regardless. so deadpool was originally created in new mutants vol 1 issue #98 as a mercenary who was hired to take out cable so they spent a lot of their early years trying to kill each other. they are forced to stop avoiding or attempting to kill each other in cable & deadpool vol 1 because of this virus that had infected both of them and thus the only way for them both to survive was to merge their dna structures in an event which i like to call cablepool homoerotic goop cannibalism. the result of this is that cable cannot time travel without taking deadpool with him. following your lover across the multiverse because of fate and to save the world? thats vrisrezi as hell! anyway they cure the virus and they get to stop bodysliding together woohoo. a similar thing happens when cable gets lost in alternate universes and deadpool has to travel through a bunch to save him. then there was everything with cable and providence … so providence was this little paradise island that cable built off of his orbital station called providence that got attacked by aliens and space pirates and deadpool ran in to help only to find oops! cable doesnt actually fully trust him! so cable 'dies' (he doesnt actually die he comes back) along with providence because thats how much he doesnt trust deadpool. which is reminiscent of the jack noir confrontation innit? vriska was so convinced of her own heroism and skill and so afraid of trusting others that she preferred to die than not be at the center of the narrative (fitting as well since deadpool is obviously a very meta character lol). they havent interacted a whole lot beyond that after cable & deadpool ended because the x-editors are evil and hate me and they hate nicieza yaoi and also deadpool is now a Popular Character so they have to tear him away from his roots and make him gay with spiderman instead for some reason. but i get it. get me on a cable & deadpool book i'll be normal (i will not be normal). anyway that book ended in 2008? iirc? which means it was likely On The Mind whilst writing homestuck. and if hussie wasnt into deadpool but WAS into daredevil enough to make a daredevil clone oc i will eat my hat because deadpool And specifically cable & deadpool is like, completely in tune with their writing style. anyway theres my proof that domino is vriska but cablepool is vrisrezi that was most certainly not an excuse to talk about my xmen Hope you all enjoyed it👍

[darkroomofsecrets]

I'm really stressed rn because I feel like I've been overwhelming myself with work and school and family and friends and relationships for a long time and its finally catching up to me...I don't get how people have time for everything while remaining sane.

I was just reflecting on how the past couple years ive become this person that is constantly overworking myself and can't allow myself to just relax and spend a day doing nothing without feeling guilty and it's so weird because I know this is who I am now but at the same time I barely recognize myself as this kind of person. it's so strange because a lot of the people in my life now have told me they admire this about me, but I'm still accepting that this is who I am. like my therapist told me a while ago that she could tell from the moment she met me that I'm the type of person who has to have my life together because if at any point I feel like my life isn't in control than it makes me spiral due to me learning as a child that the only person I can rely on is myself. and though I agree, I never thought about how I wasn't actually this way until a few years ago, and I'm just now realizing why.

for most of my teen years/early adulthood I relied on my ex on a lot and allowed him to be there for me because like any normal bf, he was there for me. until he wasn't. lol. and I think that retriggered my childhood abandonment wounds, reinforcing the idea that the only person there for me is myself and the only person I can rely on is myself. because if the people who have had the biggest impact on my life, my parents and my bf at the time (who was part of my life for 1/3 of my life), have showed me that they aren't there for me then... obviously that's going to have an affect on me lol. and to add on to that my mom acting like it was the end of the world that I had to move back into my room that she converted into her "office/craft room" when I told her I broke up with my bf and needed to get out of our apartment asap...literally fuck everyone lmfao the only person that has consistently been there for me is my grandma. except she did make a comment about wanting to visit my ex at his job because "I love him he didn't do anything to me". obviously she doesn't know about everything leading up to me breaking up with him and how he's acted since but it still kinda sucks. it just shows that she is genuine and really loved and cared about him, even though he doesn't deserve it. but the fact that all of this has turned me into this hyper-independent person that has no time for anyone makes a lot of sense.

in one sense, I'm glad all this happened and has taught me that the only person I have is myself. because I am actually working towards building a life I deserve and want now. but in another sense, I don't want to be the type of person that blocks all connections and builds walls between themselves and other people because they're scared of getting hurt. there's a fine line between being busy and working on yourself and being stuck in a hyper-independent, trust-no-one mindset and I'm really trying to not cross that line. but sometimes I wonder if my priorities are out of wack. like I'm 25 and not as far in life as I would like to be because I fucked around too much when I was younger and now I feel like I have to make up for it and do as much as I can until I reach those goals. but also I'm still somewhat young and feel like I should be prioritizing friendships and allowing myself to make romantic connections but its hard to do that while being in school and working. also...I did work on my and prioritize my relationship for most of the last 10 years of my life and look where it got me...idk I'm Lost

[kashmirichaiwithmehr]

.

[crookedkingdom]

yea we've all been rightfully clowning spn but im broken inside so now im really considering catching up on the stupid show

[straighttohellbuddy]

you make me hate this city {Dream}

Summary: They/Them. A series of moments. Any publicity is good publicity, right? Well accidentally falling into beef with arguably the most popular Minecraft streamer in recent memory certainly keeps you relevant. But as time goes on, you realise more and more that staying relevant isn't the most important thing in the world.

A/N: 3009 words. i gotta stop adding 'i dont know what this is' to my authors notes but also i don't know what this is. i was listening to Happier Than Ever, but also OverHeated has better vibes for this fic. im actually incredibly happy with this one, like deadass a fan of my own wording lmfao. please let me know what you think. also i wrote this on my phone and welcome to 3.30am ive lost all control of my life.

Warnings: choking imagery but nothing actually serious.

Citrus Scale: 🧡 ORANGE 🧡

You blew up by accident, but isn't that the way it always seems to go these days?

---

"Wait, who? Dream, no I don't know who that is," you laugh dismissively, "contrary to popular belief, I don't know every online personality in Florida; it's a big place... why would I know a Minecraft youtuber? That's the kind of content that gets millions of subscribers on YouTube now? I thought we moved passed that."

In hindsight, it was kind of a shitty thing to say, and despite the fact that you'd been thinking of what you knew of the gaming community in the past few years, it still came off as arrogant. Usually you weren't one to portray yourself as arrogant online, you'd come to be known as something of a Zeitgeist of online society, your mind had been elsewhere at the time. You didn't know Dream, didn't realise he was much bigger than you'd been assuming, at least not until you'd woken up to his reply on twitter.

It had been deleted before you'd even properly seen it, probably only minutes after he'd posted it, but there were screenshots aplenty.

[incredibly bold words coming from a tiktok influencer 🙄🤡]

Your notifications were a bloodbath.

---

Despite your private apology, acknowledging what you'd said was out of line considering your own line of work, and his apology in response, admitting that he should have known better considering how rabid he knew his fans could get, there appears to be some hostility between the two of you. Publicly, that is.

It was all for show, though that was just between the two of you. The peanut gallery that was your audience paid good money for a fight like this, not that you'd ever voice that thought out loud. Considering how far apart your demographics were, and the size of your respective audiences, the way you two would interact kept you both relevant. Whether they were intrigued about the person antagonising their 'fav', or looking to clown on them, you both got a nice boost in numbers for each scathing interaction you'd shared online.

The people you had aligned yourself with socially ate it up too.

But something about their approval left a sour taste in the back of your mouth.

---

"It feels disingenuous," you huffed over a call with Dream, right after he'd posted a new Manhunt video to his main channel, "its a good video," you grumble.

"So don't send the tweet," he yawned, "or do; don't not tweet it if it's for my sake, I know you actually like my videos thats all that matters."

You press your lips together but hit send on [imagine posting essentially the same video 8 times,,, couldn't be me].

"You know I do actually think you're creative, right?" You tried to assure him.

"I know," and his voice is fond.

---

The city is fucking suffocating you and everyone's watching.

You feel like you'll be publicly hung for being genuine; getting famous on TikTok of all platforms has always felt a bit like that to you, but it didn't start getting constricting until all you want is to love and support creators outside of your bubble, outside of your shared demographic. The heat of early Summer is in your lungs, is choking you from the inside out.

And there have been times where you've considered running, considered never logging in again, driving until you're at a gas station two states over and gasping for air in a town where the people don't recognise you. You could stay there, if you really wanted, you could live in quiet obscurity if your heart really desired it. But it's its own kind of disingenuous.

[what if i drive until my wheels give out and then just stay there forever?]

[do you want company?] His answering text surprises you, and suddenly you can feel your heart beating in your throat. You ask if he's serious. He tells you he needs to get out of the city for a bit, even a few hours.

There's too many eyes in the city. On the road there's just his.

He's in your passenger seat and you're in your head wondering if this a fever dream, a mirage from the steadily growing summer heat. Maybe if you look directly at him, he'll disappear, so you don't, just incase. He opens the window, breeze catching in his fingers.

Out of the corner of your eye, you see him looking at you for a moment. Part of you wants to thank him for his company; this is the first time when you've wanted to run, when you've actually had a reason to come back. Don't think too hard about that.

You want to thank him for the company as there comes a lul in the conversation, but the wind rushing past you steals your nerve. You stay quiet, and turn up the radio.

The afternoon is growing late. Soon, you will head back. For him.

---

So you lay on his bed on your back, staring up at the ceiling, dead silent as you hear him talking and laughing with his friends as he streams. If you make a noise, your cover will be blown, you'll ruin this good thing, this ruse. The evening is sticky hot but the faint breeze is sweet. Looking over, you take a moment to admire his profile, aglow in the light of his monitor, beautiful in the warm haze of the night. Something twists in your gut, and you look away quickly, a little overwhelmed with the moment. So you stare at his bedroom ceiling, laying atop his covers, listening to him laugh, and you stay quiet.

---

He likes several tweets about the latest rumour about you; apparently you're an industry plant. No-one is quite sure which industry, but they're sure you're a plant. One of your stan accounts posts a screenshot of the tweets he likes, commenting [those in glass houses 🙄🙄] which you like. It's routine. It's a game. That night, the two of you spend an hour driving around as the sun sets, windows down and music blaring; your grip on the steering wheel is tight and his hand is on your thigh. You don't talk about what happens online. You don't talk about a lot of things. The light from the sunset is flattering for you both; people would say you're pretty together, picture perfect together, but no-one's allowed to know.

---

You attend parties, dressed to the nines, and you send him a photo from your bedroom before the night even begins. His response is sweet, but he doesn't dare interact when you post photos online a little while later.

[wish you were here] you send from the party as the fake laughter and constant camera flashes begin to grate on your nerves, [nothing feels real]. And after waiting a few minutes and getting no response, you put your phone back in your bag, plastering a grin on your face. Smile for the camera, its what you do best, it's how you got here.

When you feel your phone buzz, when you see he's simply offered an alternative, for you to come over and spend the rest of the night with him, you give your first genuine smile in hours. But someone catches it in the back of a photo, or perhaps a video on an Instagram story, maybe both, and everyone wants to know what had you smiling so brightly, why you'd made such a quick escape from the party after.

[only smile I've seen them give without dead shark eyes] Dream himself quote retweets someone's screenshot, and your lip curls in distaste at that. It's business, but it hits too close to home. You want to reassure him that he makes you happy, but it feels too honest, too raw. So you bite your tongue, keep quiet, give a snarky response online with your head in his lap.

---

"No I don't have thoughts about Mask -" your lip curls derisively. You've been listening to it on repeat. "What makes you think I spend my time thinking about Florida Man?" He'd think it was ironic, think it was amusing; you'd hear it before it had been released, sitting on the end of his bed, chin propped up on your hand as you beamed at him. He seemed pretty nonchalant as he'd asked you what you'd thought, but as you'd given a gentle, adoring sigh that spoke volumes on its own, you'd seen the way his posture had relaxed, the proud little smile he'd turned back to his monitor to hide.

"Everyone's a musician these days I guess," faced with the invasive reporter, you rolled your eyes.

---

The people you call friends because you know you should hide the way they look down on gaming, on streaming; it's good for clout, but it's not like it's a real job. Don't they get that none of your jobs are real? Influencers are the lucky, pretty few, famous for existing at right place at the right time. You didn't expect this. You didn't grow up wanting to be on display like you are now.

They think you'll join in on their scorn, and though you've got your public beef, of course, you're heart hasn't been in it for a long time.

"Its clown on clown violence," you'd muttered darkly, glowering into the frypan you'd been put in charge of. Sapnap, cutting vegetables beside you, sorts a laugh, and asks what your friends would say if they could see you now. Quiet now, you focus on the sizzling pan before you.

"They'd think you've been a bad influence on me," you murmur, expression scrunching up. Becoming friends with Sapnap was inevitable, and was amusing to the rest of the world; taking a liking to your perceived arch-enemy's best friend was a delightful twist of fate.

After a long moment of silence, with only the gentle cooking noises to fill the space between you, he tells you he likes you better offline. It might be one of the nicest things anyone's ever said to you.

---

Florida is better than LA, socially, but not by much. There's less influencers per capita. Small miracles.

The nights feel long here, but maybe there's too much on your mind for you to get to sleep. You post on your IG asking if anyone was awake and nearby. Predictably your DMs are flooded, but you're not sure what you're looking for, what you want. A few other sleepless friends respond, asking if you wanna meet up, make some impromptu content. Everything about you had become monetised, even your insomnia; everything tastes sour as you read through their messages.

But Dream texts you asking if you want to go for a drive. You don't even ask where, you just say yes.

You're in your pyjamas when he picks you up, but then again so is he, brightly patterned cotton shorts against the fancy leather seats. There's already music playing when you curl up in the front seat, some songs you recognise, some you don't, but it's enough to keep your thoughts at bay.

Streetlights glowing rose gold along the highway, you don't care where he's going. Even in the dark, when you turn to look at him, you can catch the serious, pensive look on his face.

You want to tell him you love him, but you can't open your mouth.

He drives up the coast in the dark, until the sky and sea begin to turn lilac beyond the windows. On a lookout near a town whose name you don't know, the two of you sit on the hood of his car and watch the sunrise. He's got his arm around you, resting his head against yours, and for a moment, you close your eyes.

"I wish I could tell people how happy you make me," your voice the thought that had been plaguing for months, and Dream holds you a little tighter. He turns, in that moment, and presses a fond smile against your temple, followed by a kiss.

After a moment, you pull out your phone, and quietly ask if you can take a photo of the two of you. He hesitates, but only for the barest moment.

"Who am I gonna send it to; Sapnap?" You asked, though the moment may be more revealing than you'd intended, as the realisation flashes through your mind that the two of them had somehow become your closest friends, and perhaps the only two friends you honest felt like you could trust.

But it's enough to convince Dream, whose smile is half hidden with the way he's resting his head against yours, the two of you warm and full of joy in the light of the sunrise. Something about the photo has your breath catching in your throat.

You make the photo your phone background. He doesn't comment, but when you glance to him, you can see how wide his smile is.

---

The change is gradual. Bit by bit you force yourself back to being the person you started out as, the person you were offline, the version of you that you actually liked. It's the return of authenticity, of doing the things you actually enjoyed instead of whatever was on trend.

You didn't go to parties if you didn't like the people. You stopped making content with the people you knew were just using you for clout. You let yourself find joy in the work you did.

The people who mattered in your life respected it, applauded it, encouraged it. It felt good to laugh on camera and mean it. The uptick in followers may be from how genuine you were now being with the content you made, but with each day, you found yourself caring less and less about the numbers. It was freeing.

---

"I love you."

He says it first, late at night, for no reason that you can see. You'd been in his kitchen, one earbud in and video pause as you were whisper-ranting about how Tommyinnit didn't deserve the shit he got online-

"- he's good kid, and damn funny too! If I hear someone shittalk him in real life, I don't know, I feel like I'd start biting people - or maybe I'm biased, or need sleep; what time is it? -"

"I love you," and he's giving you this adoring look that had the words dying in your throat as you process the moment. He's sitting on his kitchen counter, wearing your merch hoodie, looking like something out of a dream you'd once had. Then, softly, finally, you find your voice and the words you've been longing to say;

"I love you, too."

His smile grows a touch wider, a touch fonder.

And you wonder where it came from, somehow without seeing how long the moment had been coming.

---

You agree to be on podcasts because the concept intrigues you, and happily and candidly admit that your shift in branding, in tone, in vibe if you will, was down to one thing; love.

And yes, finding someone was the catalyst, but it was realising that you didn't even like who you'd become that had been the driving force behind the change. You wanted to be able to love the content you created. You wanted to be able to love the version of yourself you put out into the world.

But the only thing the audience cares about, of course, is the revelation that you're in love.

---

[has enough time passed? am i allowed to admit publicly that i simp for @dream]

"Babe!" Comes shouted from the next room over less than thirty seconds after you post your tweet. The comes your boyfriend, practically tackling you, grinning from ear to ear as he bemoans how there's no way he can respond to that without giving anything away. You're cackling with delight at his dilemma, before pointing out that unless it was spelled out, no-one would be able to guess at the truth.

In the end, he quote tweets your post with [on your enemies-to-lovers arc i see].

---

There's an afternoon where you fall asleep on his sofa wearing one of his merch hoodies, one of his personal ones, oversized even on him, that had been tossed to the side but still clean enough for your liking. He'd been trying to get a cute and not-blurry photo of Patches in some of the new pet-merch, but she wasn't interested, clearly, preferring to trot out to you, curling up, radiating purrs by your stomach as you napped.

The photo he takes doesn't have your face in frame, but if anyone looked hard enough they could probably make an educated guess as to who was in the photo. There's something so soft about it, about how Patches was blinking happily at the camera as her little paws came to rest on your arm, warm and comfortable in the afternoon light.

"Patches, my beloved," you mumble groggily as you crack an eye open. It takes you half a moment to take in the scene, but you seem content to brush off her apparent favouritism by telling him that the hoodie smells like him. Your half asleep mind meant it to be an explanation for the cat's behaviour, but as you close your eyes again, you miss the way he goes vaguely pink and endeared, as you bury yourself further into the hoodie as best you can.

When you wake properly, you give your blessing for him to post it to Instagram. But the thing that catches you off guard is that he's made it his lock screen.

---

"Accidentally shittalking you might be the best thing I ever did," you murmur, tracing his features, illuminated by the moonlight streaming through the window. He laughs, and your fingers follow the curve of his cheek. Like this, he is beautiful, and he is yours.

You want to tell him you love him, so you do.

[aguecheek]

Can you tell us about that gender bent midsummer night's dream production you did lights for?

Oh boy oh baby oh boy ive been waiting for this one

So in 2019, I ran lights for a Free Shakespeare in the Park production of Midsummer that took the characters of Lysander and Helena and genderswapped them. Lysander became Lysandra, and Helena became Helenus. And dude???????? It changed...SO MUCH??? It literally lives in my head rent free, i still think about this production every goddamn day. More under the cut.

When Hermia’s father insists that she marry Demitrius or face death, it becomes much less a matter of a man exerting control over his daughter as if he owns her, although it still definitely is that, but now takes on a new dimension. Egeus has delivered an ultimatum: be straight or be killed. Absolutely fucking terrifying, and for modern audiences especially, the stakes suddenly become much more personal and much more real. (We also kept a running tally of every family who left in the middle of the show when they realized it was gay LMFAO our highest record number was 18 families in one night. Gotta love PA!) So in the scene immediately following that, you get this really gorgeous tenderness in the “how now my love, why is your cheek so pale” scene, you know the one. The agreement to elope, the overwhelming joy that comes from the notion of leaving your homophobic father and going to live with your girlfriend’s accepting aunt...it’s good, it gave me the warm and fuzzies.

The Helenus comes on, and oh boy oh boy oh fucking boy. Because in the first scene, you have this line from Lysandra about Demitrius promising himself to Helenus, and Egeus looking absolutely horrified at it, and Demitrius denying it fervently. And Helenus is lost, confused, and desperate, and he’s seeking comfort in two other openly gay people, his childhood best friend and her girlfriend—and the’re both leaving athens. Together. When he gives that fucking goddamn how happy some o’er other some can be speech (which ive had memorized since i was eight because its so unbelievably fuckign good) it’s absolutely HEARTRENDING. Demitrius was his, and they were in love, and then demitrius got cold feet and backed out, and now hermia and lysandra are leaving too, and helenus is going to be alone in athens.

Then you get helenus and demitrius’s first scene together, the “you draw me you hardhearted adamant” scene, the “spurn me like a dog” scene. And this scene was hard for me to watch every single night. Because, now forgive me for getting a little personal, I struggled with a lot of internalized homophobia for a pretty significant portion of my life. And there was this awful heartwrenching moment the actors did where demitrius grabbed helenus by his shirt and their mouths were inches apart and demetrius like tore himself away and stumbled away shouting and it just...i’ll say, okay, i named my sword demitrius(That’s not a euphamism, I have a sword hanging on the wall of my apartment named demitrius, I intend to name all my swords after shakespeare cahracters)because of this character. I don’t like demitrius within the text, i think he’s an asshole LMAO. But this version of demitrius really just grabbed my heart ripped it out of my chest and stomped on it, because he wasn’t a misogynist freak, he was a real dude struggling with some serious significant internalized homophobia. It gave him a reason to reject helenus, it gave him a reason to pursue hermia, and it gave him an actual in-depth character reason to be a dick other than just...hey, this is demitrius, he’s a dick to women.

One of the worst and best scenes every night was the fight scene. Now the fight scene fucking gets me, no matter what, but with the sexuality dynamics, god, it’s just so fucked up. Because when demitrius first starts acting all lovely-dovey towards helenus, there’s this awful heartbreaking look of longing on helenus’s face, and then when “oh, spite, oh, hell” comes bursting out, ur heart breaks ight the fuck along with him. Not to mention now here’s hermia, who ran away from her father to be with her girlfriend, to escape the confines of heterosexuality, so they could be together, and now lysandra is turning away from her and trying to get all cozy with helenus. Helenus’s heart is breaking because he thinks that he’s being betrayed by his own community, being mocked for something that they above all else should support him for. Hermia’s heart is breaking because she’s losing the one person she sacrificed everything to be with. Lysandra and demitrius are fine lmao they’re asleep, they don’t know whats going on.

But like okay. Okay. god. Okay. listen to me. When theyre all running exhaustedly through the woods and they eventually collapse on the ground, sound asleep, and puck comes out with the cure for the spell...he cures them both. HE CURES BOTH LYSANDRA AND DEMITRIUS. Because unlike in the original text, demitrius doesn’t need to be under a spell to love helenus. He loved him all along, he never stopped loving him, he just...wouldn’t let himself. So wheras in the heterosexual midsummer, puck usually cures lysander but not demetrius, in this version, you have them both being cured, both being brought back to themselves. 

And when they wake up, and the lights went all purple and blue and soft and the music started playing (it was fucking moon river. The music was fucking moon river please im going to cry) and they’re all just standing there, holding the person they love, swaying softly, whispering in amazement at their fantastic dream…”are you sure that we are awake?” oh my fucking god. Oh my fucking god. Oh my god.

Then everybody comes storming on, theseus and hippolyta and egeus and such, and demitrius has that line...that fucking line… “The object and the pleasure of mine eye Is only Helenus. To him, my lord, Was I betrothed ere I saw Hermia. But like in sickness did I loathe this food, But as in health come to my natural taste, Now I do wish it, love it, long for it, And will for evermore be true to it.” DUDE ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME THAT’S SO GOOD. Because unlike with the magic flower route, he actually is returning to his natural tastes. This is the story, this is his story, this is him giving up on his attempts to hide that part of himself. This is him accepting who he is and wishing for Helenus, loving him, longing for him, will forevermore be true to him….god. It got me every single fucking night. Every goddamn single night that line made me tear up.

And then they all got married and it was lovely and beautiful blah blah its a comedy everybody gets married you know the drill <3 but yeah, i still think about that production every single fucking day of my life. I dont think ill ever stop thinking about it.

[somebodycallixii]

tagged by @choitaeyang for the little P1ece questions thing :)

(ps im sorry i didnt answer all of the questions but i just didnt want the post to get too long!!)

1. Since when have you been a P1ece? I listened to Siren for the first time like early last fall, and found That's It a little later, and i remember thinking ok this is probably some well established group like their rapping and sound overall just really impressed me. (cut to surprised pika face when i found out OH THEY'RE LITERALLY ONLY A YEAR OLD)

2. What made you decide to stan P1H? i knew i liked their music but i decided to officially stan when i found out they were at FNC because n.flying is my ult, so i was like this must be a sign??? lmfao

3. Who is/are your bias(es)? jiung!

4. Your favourite era so far? in terms of music, Siren/Stand Out is my fav but in terms of looks/concept, Do It Like This/Find Out by a long shot.

5. Your favourite title track/MV? I like the MV for scared the best because the concept for it is really artistic, plus the falling rocks genuinely made me nervous so A+ for the immersive experience alkdflsdkjs

6. Your fav P1H choreo? the intro to Reset is so amazing, they are literally so in sync its mesmerizing to watch

7. Your fav b-sides? That's it is one of my favorite kpop songs ever, and idk if this counts as a title or a b side but i also love breakthrough a LOT

8. Your fav cover of theirs? MANIAC MANIAC MANIAC oh my god if you havent listened to it yet you have to. i love it even more because they were in charge of the creative direction for the video and they talked about how they had to put moodboards together and stuff. it makes me glad that they have some creative control for their content!!

10. Have you watched their little STAGE + performances? What’s your favourite? i havent seen all of them but this one with seob and intak is my favorite that ive seen. im usually not a fan of lyrical dancing like this but the beginning part is so good and i can just watch it over and over

12. Most iconic P1H tiktok in your opinion? soul glitching to the "listen to me now" audio fucking kills me. its literally so dumb but it cracks me up dlkfjsdlfs

13. A P1H moment you love? when they did the portrait drawing contest on Jongseobs birthday live, and keeho gave this big speech about how some artists arent appreciated in their time just bc he lost sldkfjlsk😭

16. A collab you’re hoping for? in their daebak show interview keeho and jiung said that they want to try more bandy music, so i think them working with n.flying would be so cool!! it would make my n.fia heart so happy

18. Fav lyric if you have one? "going my own way with two great danes, gotta stay humble like bill murray" certified iconic

19. Fav vocal, rapper and dancer? vocal has to be keeho, rapper jongseob, dancer soul!! why my own bias isnt on this list the world may never know.

23. Something you love about being a P1ece? I always love being a part of smaller fandoms because theres such a strong sense of community and dedication that sometimes gets lost in groups with huge fanbases. (in terms of like, when fanbases get bigger there can be lots of weird drama about voting or who should have won what or which fandoms are "fighting" one another but with smaller groups its like "woo!! we got a comeback!!" lmfao)It's a difficult balance, because while you want them to become successful and reach a larger audience, theres something special about stanning a newer/less well known group and feeling that camaraderie in fandom spaces.

Bonus: Anything P1Harmony-related that you want to recommend to your (non-P1ece) followers or to new P1eces?

Keeho covering "All of Me" by john legend genuinely surpasses the original, i could listen to this for days!! pls listen and be amazed!!!

[cirillafionaelenriannon]

ranking the barbie media ive seen. worst to best.

19. princess charm school

no.

18. a perfect christmas

okay, i have some feelings about this movie because i was only a little too old for it when it came out, and i did rewatch it a few years ago and it was heart warming, but it unfortunately falls prey to the faults of new barbie movies still, and is therefore lower on the list

17. barbie: thumbelina

my god i wouldnt have had the self control not to keep those little fucked up fairies in my room as a kid.

16. barbie fairytopia

this is EXCLUDING MERMAIDIA because that movie is on another level. however this includes the first film and the gay rainbow one. i am not fairytopias biggest fan, i found it actually pretty boring when i rewatched it a while ago, even if it does feature bibble. i also dont like that alina is given wings at the end. 

15. barbie: a fairy secret

RAQUELLE AND BARBIE HAVE ROMANTIC TENSION IN THIS MOVIE.

14. barbie: a fashion fairy tale

i have some nostalgia for this movie. i love the closet metaphor. and the music was nice. i barely remember the plot tho this ranking is solely on Vibes. 

13. mariposa

love mariposas voice. design amazing. nothing that special abt it. 

12. barbie and the three musketeers

omfg i love this movie. the musketeers. im obsessed w them. i had the video game on ds as a kid and i cry thinking abt how i dont have it anymore. i hated the cat though.

11. rapunzel

its. ughahg. eh? im putting it this high because of the bEAUTIFUL SOUNDTRACK!!!! also because i have so many positive memories associated w it like watching it w my bff a few years ago and her commentary...lmfao. i love that fucked up rabbit. 

10. swan lake

i barely remember this movie but it makes me hungry and i fucking love the costume design and the soundtrack.

9. island princess

omfg okay. this movie. so many thoughts. firstly that the music is absolutely amazing, and i cry every single time i watch this movie. everytime. i cant explain. i cant. the scene where she remembers being lost at sea, and when she reuinites with her mother. i sob so fucking hard. i hate the plot though i think its awful. that red headed woman disgusts me. also that elephant is horrible. otherwise the rating would be higher. ‘i need to know’ is a beautiful duet. and ‘right here in my arms’ AUUAGHAHGHAHGAHGHAHG

8. mermaidia 

THIS MOVIE. i love it so much. nori is one of my favourite barbie characters ever, and im obsessed w her design as well as the plot of this movie actually being really fucking good. the design of those freaky little baby mermaids, and their mermaid food? i loved the giant sea snail and her huge Body. alina was a really compelling character in this because of her relationship with nori, and this movie gave us one of the best scenes ever with bibble and those fruit. 

7. barbie in a mermaid tale

literally i just have so much nostalgia for this because i was like 10 or something i dont know but something about it like has me in an iron grip. the intro scene, the music, the animation. reminds me of being a kid. sobbing. 

6. barbie in a christmas carol

WHEN HAS THIS MOVIE EVER NOT MADE ME CRY. god as a kid i hated this movie because the blonde girl pissed me off but i was totally missing the core message. i cant believe barbie fully told a story about child abuse and neglect, and did it well, making me feel for that horrible woman. but i still cry in that scene where that lady cant adopt the little girl because shes like. totally dead. so tragic. 

5. 12 dancing princesses

not much 2 say abt this one! i kind of despise half of the plot but the costume design was amazing, the theme song is . PHENOMENAL. and the love interest was great. also, a talking bird. im listening to the song rn and holding back tears. magical experience. 

4. barbie in the nutcracker

CRYING AND SOBBING. so much nostalgia...oahhg man. i want to marry the nutcracker but only in his nutcracker form hes kind of ugly as an actual guy. the theme of magic in this movie is palpable, the dancing scene is absolute ass in hindsight but its one of the first barbie films using computer animation so i can forgive it. its literally just so beautiful. the only complaint i have is that i WISH it had ended in tragedy, with clara fasding away forever, unable to return, but always remembering..i wouldve pissed y pants. 

3. barbie and the diamond castle

OKAY I would make this number  2 but number 2 HAS to be number 2 i cannot change it. this movie is just so gay like actually. for real gay. i love the flirting, the touching, the love between the two girls. its also beautiful, i loved the colours in this the palette is so bright and fun. (also the song at the start of the movie makes me cry like a baby)

2. barbie and the magic of pegasus. 

i want aidan carnally. 

1. barbie and the princess and the pauper

MY GOD!!! LITERALLY THE BEST BARBIE MOVIE. i wish mattel would go back to its roots of music with violins and cello and anything orchestral instead of droning pop music, because its so so beautiful. lyrically the songs are Amazing, the story is just. literally the best barbie movie story ever like. the themes of acceptance, duty and profound love and friendship. dominiks relationship with erika, julian and annelieses relationship, erika and anneliese friendship and unbreakable bond. the cats as characters!!!! premingers BANGERS????? phenomenal. 

okay thanks. 

[azuwulastan]

D (r.e. azula apart), F, S ?

D: Is there a song or a playlist to associate with azula apart?

tbh i just put some songs together now bc before now ive been listening to all kinds of things that have nothing to do with what im writing abt. most of what ive put together doesn’t directly correspond to actual events, but rather just different relationships and characters that appear - lots of stuff abt love and relationships bc now i think about it the emotional stuff is all pretty mixed up and sad... i would say more abt why these songs in particular and who they correspond to but dont want to give away spoilers

doll parts - hole

total control - the motels

your mangled heart - the gossip (live version bc its dedicated to the gays and ive had a wicked crush on beth ditto for as long as i can remember)

[I’ll just be] unfulfilled - syzygy (interestingly this is actually from mai’s synth pop band’s ep in a modern au)

Distant Memory - Les Rallizes Dénudés (this is kind of a holdover from All That Remains Is Smoke)

woman - angel olsen

na dne - molchat doma

F: Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

okay this was really hard. im probs most proud of the chapter in All That Remains Is Smoke where theres the tyzula kiss n then azula realises she lost control all the fire bc that was the original scene i wanted to write when i came up with the whole fic and i think it really worked and came out far more.. idk devastating than i originally wanted. 

in terms of actual dialogue, from Such A Bitch

As Azula moved forward, Ty Lee stopped her with a hand to her stomach.

“Just… play nice tonight. Please.”

Azula flicked her hair over her shoulder with a smirk.

“Oh Ty Lee, I always play nice.”

And Ty Lee did not know whether to laugh or to cry.

followed by this

At one point during the night Ty Lee noticed Azula enter the kitchen after Katara from across the room.  Oh no. She edged closer so she could overhear the conversation. Azula was asking Katara about some area of greenspace that Katara’s organisation had been petitioning for consideration for protection from pollution, logging, and industrial dumping. It was a heated issue that had been a cause Katara had been championing for months now. Notably, Azula’s party had been stonewalling any environmental protection bills. Just about every person at the gathering had been an audience to Katara’s frustration, and now knew to avoid the topic. And Azula brought it up with all the subtlety of a hand grenade.

“Well from my  understanding, it’s a zoning issue.”

Katara spluttered. “A zoning issue?! It’s an issue of those big companies your political party represents thinking they can dump their toxic sludge into any waterway they please!”

Azula made an exaggerated sigh. “ Think about it. Would the “toxic sludge” end up in your wetlands if the points of entry that industry uses to dump their waste were rezoned? Into something residential maybe? No-one wants industrial chemicals being dumped into their neighbourhood”

Katara, while still irritated, seemed to lower her guard slightly. “What are you talking about? Just say what you mean, Azula.”

“I’m saying that your petitions and placards approach isn’t working.”

“It’s not - It’s not a petitions and placards approach!”

“Just  listen . I might be able to pull some strings and put you in touch with someone who could be a useful ally if you play your cards right.”

Katara scoffed. “Who?”

“Mr Li. Property developer. Very close with some high ranking members of government. I’m sure you could work something out.”

Azula left the kitchen and almost bumped into Ty Lee. Seeing her questioning look, she said “What? I was playing nice, wasn’t I?”

bc i love the idea of azula antagonising everyone but with somewhat good intentions. also, i love kazula dynamics and i think this was a good way to include that in this story.

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

kind of love enemies to lovers, slow burns, mutual pining or just pining in general. fake dating also lmfao but when its done well.

[kadywicker]

endgame Thots spoilers ahead...................................

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so honestly i think the quote that best sums this up is thor’s quote about stopping trying to be what’s expected and just being who he is. i’m aware that characters are written and ultimately the writer controls what happens BUT i think that perfectly sums up the difference between character arcs & in character actions.

everyone is complaining about thor and steves arcs and it’s like..... arc wise yes thor shouldve been king & steve shouldve acclimated to the future. but arcs are ALSO written and most of the time characters are forced into situations and it’s a completed character arc bc it rhymes/it’s poetic/it completes a cycle. BUT that is not the same thing as a character doing something in character. steve WANTED to go back and live with peggy. thor WANTED to explore the universe away from duty. maybe they didnt complete specific arcs that everyone expected but... they’re being who they are. in contrast to that you have tony who WANTED to stay with his family but chose to sacrifice himself & this completed his character arc beautifully. but those two kinds of ends for characters are not at odds with each other and one is not automatically bad writing bc the other one exists.

that being SAID here’s some more general thoughts

thors appearance was p bad im gonna be honest that was like. the one uncomfortable thing to watch

i literally sat there bawling and hiccuping when tony died like..... im an iron man stan now and im so fucking sad what the FUCK

the whole theater lost their collective minds when carol showed up & then at the end when t’challa showed up which just shows you where everyone is

but the MOST applause was when steve used the hammer. my hands hurt from clapping. everyone was screaming.

whats the deal w peter??? like he went back to school & in homecoming all his old classmates are there like did his entire class get snapped fhasdfsdf

a bitch was crying about scott and cassie what the fuck

MORGAN????????????

FUCKING MORGAN OH MY GOD THAT POOR SWEET BABY. SHE WAS SO CUTE AND ILOVE HE R RR R AND TONY IS SUCH A GOOD DAD? HELLO? 

the scene where all the mcu ladies go to beat up thanos healed my gay heart and idc if its pandering i want it

HOWEVER the promised gay rep was THE stupidest thing ive ever seen in my life like i get that disney sucks but dont promise smth amazing and build it up and then have it be some random fucking man at a group therapy session

loki................... he just straight up left hfasdofsfd is he okay out there

VALKYRIE GOD I AM. SO FUCKING GAY YOU GUYS. HER HAIR? MAAM??? 

also im a bit confused on the time travel thing? they said it wouldnt affect their present if they went to the past & established that its different timelines. but then.... how did steve end up old in the future? i mean this isnt a major gripe though ANY show dealing w time travel literally always has time travel plot holes so if i see u guys saying this means its bad writing im gonna lose my mind. time travel is impossible for a reason (unless its to the future but even then its bc of time dilation) and its gonna end up w plot holes when ur trying to write a show w it

am i the only one that got the “blue meanie” reference? tony said it about nebula and my obscure knowledge from being a misguided 12 year old obsessed w the beatles. came in handy. blue meanies were the villains in the beatles movie yellow submarine. theyre these motherfuckers.

I LOVE YOU 3000...............

i never cared abt clint or natasha but wow that shit hurted 

literally the entire funeral scene was the worst thing that ever happened to me i sat there sobbing so hard my throat started hurting

i am iron man...................... u sure fucking are man :(

SAM. GOT. THE SHIELD. SAMS CAPTAIN AMERICA BITCHES WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUCK HELLO????? IM SO HAPPY. I WAS HOPING FOR THAT

bucky looked pretty for his 3 seconds of screentime 

im as much of a st*cky fan as anyone else but did you guys truly think disney was gonna do that like....... if u think the movie sucks and is bad writing bc ur ship isnt canon u r gonna have a real bad time watching just about anything. i get being upset abt queerbaiting bc there was a bit of that wrt cast interviews and writer interviews but in the actual movies like...... it wasnt gonna happen idk what u guys expected :/ 

also fanfiction still exists u cant let canon stop u from having ur own imagination like u can literally write WHATEVER u want. half the fandom still writes 2012 avengers fics where they all live in the same tower. its fine. its okay. the actual movies arent the be all end all u can choose ur own adventure

HE WENT FOR THE HEAD

tony & peter hugging was so much for me and im so fucking sad right now yall. and peter telling him goodbye. ouch! he looked up to tony even if that was misguided at times 

also i didnt care abt tony and pepper either and here i am. caring. endgame truly just made me Care. 

gamora is BACK & her being her past self and missing is just fodder for quill/gamora fanfiction i cannot WAIT to see the next guardians movie and watch them fall in love again. 

i love nebula so goddamn much what the fuck. daughter. 

i personally dont care for steve/peggy and in my own personal headcanons and preferences im gonna do away w that whole...... thing bc i dont personally like it but it still isnt really bad writing imo & guys hes been in love w peggy from the start that cant be shocking now

SAMBUCKY RISE...........

on your LEFT everyone also lost their minds on that one i think thats when they started losing it and then when tchalla showed up the screams went even louder and i think everyone was just screaming for 2 minutes

i know i already said it but I LOVE YOU 3000. FUUUUCK ME

pepper as iron man was sooo fucking good she better take up the mantle like ooooh fuck. oh my god. that was amazing and i love her sm

okay okay i think that sums it up im done now but anyway endgame is good & most of the ppl complaining are just the type of ppl that like to Hate Absolutely Everything bc its edgy and cool to be like that. go see it. form ur own opinion. dont feel obligated to follow the masses (at least on tumblr. everyone else seems to love it lmfao but theyre not pressured by this website to act like everything is Bad and Terrible) & be bitter about it. like what you like and take out what you dont like it is That Simple. its a good movie

[nintxndos]

an nsfw ask meme (hide ur eyes kiddos)

I was looking through my blog and saw I answered this ask meme back in 2016 and the answers are preeetttyyyy different so I thought i would give it a go again

1. Are you a virgin? nope havent been for a hot minute now

2. Does anyone besides you know your bra/penis size? Yes ive mentioned it to my bff a few times lmfao

3. Do you know anyone who has any STDs? Yeah my fucking dad (actually it may have been an sti but still)

4. Were you married when you first lost your virginity? nope lmfao

5. Do you swear under celibacy? nah man

6. When did you first lose your virginity? If you haven't, when would you like to? ugh back in 2016 not a good time tbh

7. Have you ever gotten tricked into aphrodisiacs or alcohol for sex? nope

8. Have you walked in on someone masturbating/having sex? Yeah my parents when I was 5 amd I still remember it vividly

9. Have you ever seen someone masturbate or have sex with their permission? yes I quite enjoy it tbh

10. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex? the couch in my boyfriends parents house when everyone was home

11. If you had to chose one, would you have outdoor sex or car sex? car sex bc I dont want grass in my asshole

12. When was the age you first masturbated? Whether you knew it or not? probably 14 or 15

13. Have you ever helped someone "finish"? yes I really love it too

14. Have you ever had an erection in the past month? (clitorial counts, too) I dont know?

15. When was the last time you have had an erection? (clitorial counts, too) didnt know this was a thing tbh lmfao

16. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed? gonna take a guess and say no

17. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate) clitoral

18. What is your bra/penis size? 38DD

19. Has anyone seen your private parts other than yourself or a family member? yes

20. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus? a boys dick ayyy

21. Do you like rough sex or intimate sex better? rough sex gets me fucked UP (though intimate is nice too)

22. When was the last time you masturbated? uhhh 2 days ago maybe?

23. When was the last time you had sex? god two weeks ago and im dying i swear

24. When was the last time you watched porn? a few days ago maybe

25. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do? yes i have y first was a little blue bullet and the most recent is a vibrating dildo

26. Guys: Circumsized? not male

27. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched? thighs and neck fuckkk

28. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched? the clit baby!!

29. Girls: Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation? nope though wow good for the ladies who can

30. What color/type of underwear are you wearing? blue panties and a floral bra

31. Have you ever sent someone a picture or video of you in the nude? Did it include sexual actions? absolutely

32. Have you ever posted a picture of image of you in the nude on a website? Did it include sexual actions? nope

33. Have you ever anonymously sent/posted a picture or video of yourself in the nude? Did it include sexual actions? nope

34. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr? nope

35. When was the last time you have had a wet dream? maybe a week or so ago?

36. Which wet dream was your favorite? not sharing lmfao

37. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with? well im currently dating my best friend of 7/8 years

38. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with? yes

39. Have you ever masturbated with someone? yeah

40. Have you ever took a shower with someone that is not a family member? no :'----( I dont even wanna fuck in the shower I just want my back washed

41. Favorite sexual position? If you are a virgin, which position interests you? honestly i love missionary

42. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed? Fuck yes

43. Are you into any BDSM? god yeah

44. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why? yes because we live 3 hours away 😪😪

45. Turn on's? choking, spanking, being called names, ropes

46. Turn off's? age play is a no go

47. Have you ever had a sexual fantasy about someone? Was it about anyone other than your lover? yes i have and since we started dating absolutely not

48. Have you ever had phone sex? Video sex? Chat box sex? yes like all the time the (since he lives 3 hours away)

49. What was the weirdest thing that has ever turned you on? uhhh I cant think of anything right now tbh

50. Do you like dirty talk? oh fuck yeah

51. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation? usually quiet bc i have to but I love being loud for my boyfriend

52. Have you ever been inturrepted during sex or masturbation? Who/what? yeah someone came downstairs and started yelling abt something, also my bf and I were fucking on the couch and the remote fell over

53. Most embarressing sex/masturbation story? god my exs mom walked in right after I gave him a blow job and she was like "what are you kids doing?"

54. Most hilarious sex/masturbation story? bruh my bf and i were trying to fuck and we had to watch his sisters dog (like in the room) and she started trying to sniff his ass it was so fucking funny he jumped off me

55. What kind of porn do you like to watch? I dont really watch porn anymore tbh

56. First type of porn you have ever watched? (ie. lesbian, hentai, threesome) leabian for sure

57. What was the most recent type of porn you have ever watched? What category was it under? uhhh threesome I think

58. Most hilarious/stupidest porn you have ever watched? dude this man had a pizza around his dick and the chicks grandpa deadass had a heartattack and she still rode him

59. Have you ever fantasized over someone older than you? How much older? Younger? How much younger? chris evans tbh (older by a hot second)

60. Favorite sex toy (if any)? I quite like my purple dildo

61. Have you ever had to break up with/divorce someone because you weren't satisfied with their sex? nah

62. Have you ever used anything/gotten any surgeries to improve sexual performance/feel? nope and probably never will

63. If someone you knew asked for a nude image, would you do it? What about a tumblr follower? yes for my boyfriend anytime but not for any of yall sorry

64. Have you ever told someone any wet dreams/fantasies you've had about them? yes my bf is a fan of them

65. Do you like to have sex like they do in pornos? no bc I have real orgasms (finally!!!)

66. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them? yes I tell my bf and we have phone sex at least once a week

67. Are you able to be secretive when you masturbate? (like able to be quiet so no one can hear?) yeah I kinda have to

68. When was the first time you achieved orgasm? when i was 15 I was literally sitting on a closed toilet in my house bc I shared a room at the time w my sister so i had no choice

69. Is there only one way so far that you have been able to achieve orgasm? (ie. only by using toys, only from 1 positon,only from masturbating a certain way) nah I can do clitoral, clitoral/penatrative, and just penetration

70. Favorite type of oral? the kind w his tongue on my pussy?

71. Strangest sexual positon you've tried? havent really done any strange positions

72. Have you ever made up a sexual postion? not that I'm aware of

73. Girls: During sex, vaginal or anal? vaginal i fucking hate anal

74. Girls: During masturbation, clitorial, vaginal, or anal? clitoral

75. Do you like to be dominant or submissive? I love being a whiny sub

76. Have you ever masturbated to someone? yes

77. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn't there when you needed them? god yes that is why I usually masturbate

78. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them? yes and absolutely not

79. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial? yes and no

80. Have you ever had sex with someone who wasnt your partner? not while we were dating no, but ive had sex w people who arent him

81. Has any of your partners had sex with someone else? yes

82. Have you ever gotten pregnant? Were they your lover's or someone else's? nope though ive had a scare or two

83. Birth control or condoms? birth control

84. Do you ever masturbate to porn? not really anymore

85. Does anyone know you masturbate? Did you have to tell them? yes and not really?

86. Did your parents ever find out you were sexually active? yup

87. Do you have any STDs? nope

88. Have you ever masturbated to a fictonal character or celebrity? yeah when i was like 15/16

89. Have you ever had sex during "7 minutes in heaven"? nope never even played bc its lame

90. Spit or swallow? Or do you not like oral? I swallow if he cums in my mouth but i love getting it on my faceeee

91. Have you ever been rejected for sex? Have you ever rejected someone else? nope and yes

92. Do you have someone who said they are willing to take away your virginity if you havent lost it by a set age or if you just want to have a good time? no

93. Have you ever experimented with the opposite sex? yes

94. When you first lost your virginity, was it intended or spontanious? intended bc thats the only way we ever had sex unfortunately

95. Has anyone ever walked in when you were taking a shower with someone? nah

96. Did you ever tell someone once you lost your virginity? yeah I literally called my best friend (current boyfriend)

97. Does your lover know if you have masturbated? yes

98. Does your lover know that you want to have sex with them but cant? yes!! we dont live together and we are constantly horny it sucks!!!!

99. Do you like masturbation? eh

100. (Asker's ask) If i were to ask you if we could have sex, would you say yes? nope sorry

[maris-a-writer-now]

~Question Tag~

I was tagged by the coolest @coffee-with-woo

Rules: answer 30 questions and the tag 20 blogs you want to know better.

Nickname: Mari, Rissa

Gender: a lady through and through

Zodiac: Leo

Height: 5’5 (165 cm ish)

Age: 20

Time: 10:32 pm

Favorite band/solo artist: ikon, monsta x, nct, got7, big bang, seventeen, bap, all time low, waterparks, state champs, real friends, uhhh. others but i can’t think of them

Song stuck in my head: Airplane by ikon, and also long time no see by you guessed it, ikon.

Last movie I saw: the greatest showman

Last thing I googled: joy division song lyrics because im gross and not hip with 70′s punk(?)

Other blogs: I’m thinking about starting a side blog just for everything that doesn’t match, but other than that I don’t have any others. Just a bunch of urls saved lmfao

Do I get asks: it depends on the day cause sometimes my inbox is poppin, but sometimes its dry lol

Why I chose this username: cause im too soft to be anything but gay for jooheon

Following: im not gonna expose myself like this :)

Amount of sleep I get: i think i manage a combined total of 6 hours every night if you round and do some math

Lucky number: three for me bringing myself luck, five for everyone else

What I’m wearing: a waterparks shirt i bought at warped tour and a pair of boxers with polar bears on them.

Dream job: being a tour photographer for any band, but if i got to choose it would be all time low.

Dream trip: I want to go to Barcelona so bad???

Favorite foods: i really just can’t pick a favorite food. currently im really in love with stuff i can cook easily, like eggs, burritos, wraps. blah blah blah

Instruments: guitar, ukulele, piano, a little drums, a little flute, and i learned how to play the harp and violin back a long time ago.

Sports: sports i used to play are soccer, cheerleading, basketball, softball, track, but sports i play now is none lmfao

Hair color: its a dark brown rn, but it should be red soon idk idk

Eye color: blue

Most iconic song: honestly like when I think of iconic now, ive become biased on like what i feel is super like hit you in the feels iconic, cause an iconic song should bring something to you. So i guess my choice would have to be Climax - Team B. idk idk

Languages I speak/am learning: I really can’t speak any language except my stupid version of english, but i speak english, im actively learning korean, and im also learning spanish

Random fact: i just got my ninth tattoo lol is that a random enough fact? :))

Describe yourself as aesthetic things: leather jackets, holey jeans with converse, cursing under your breath so no one can hear it, long car rides at night, blinking street lights, seeing your breath during the winter, forehead kisses, sweaty hands, laughing too loud, star gazing

Favorite songs: this is like asking me to pick my favorite children lmao

Oh My! - Seventeen

Airplane - ikon

Be Quiet - monsta x

Shes Lost Control - Joy Division

Shes Thunderstorms - Arctic Monkeys

We Need To Talk - Waterparks

Birthday - All Time Low

Hostage - Billie Eilish

Call Out My Name - The Weeknd

Thru These Tears - LANY

I’m gonna tag a few people, but def not twenty lmao

@sheloveswonho @seokjinandtonic @jooheonni @jooheoney-thighs umm ummmm @cosmicrailwaybisexual and @leemiknow

Feel free to ignore this if you’ve done it already/don’t wanna do it <3