#i think it’d be silly if we were to call on the forth of July

[giveme-allofthat-ultraviolence]

Sophiaaaa

I love you the mostestestest ever forever n ever <3 I promiseee

Mari did you know that it’s so hot and that I can’t sleep but I love you the mostestestestest like ever and that you’re so special to me and I think you’re the most wonderful breathing organism I’ve ever studied <3

[userchandlerhere]

Who: Chandler Pierce & @billiepuckerman When: Friday, July 30th Where: Chandler’s house. What: Chandler invites Billie over to talk about the real reason they broke up, and they agree to give their relationship a second chance Word count: 6,569 Warnings: None

Chandler knew this discussion was going to happen sooner or later, and she still found herself dreading it despite her readiness. If not for the opportunity to try and fix things between the two of them, then perhaps a little closure. The fact that Billie had been upset over the past six months wasn't good news to hear, and she hoped she would be able to get back to her old self after their talk.

Now all she could think about was the possibility of seeing her ex cry in her living room again due to her. She wanted to suggest a spot where they could meet more mutually, but she couldn't think of one that would be quiet or private enough. Pacing back and forth outside of her front door, Chandler tried her best to swallow the lump that was forming on her throat. It felt just as nerve-wracking as the day they broke up, though this time there was a slight sense of hope that things wouldn't turn out as badly.

Billie wasn’t sure what to expect from this talk but her stomach was in knots, she was so nervous. She knew it was needed, even if she was scared to know Chandler’s reason, she was desperate to know *why* it had really ended between them. Billie was a little embarrassed at how obvious it probably was that she was still hung up on the other girl but there wasn’t much she could do about that now.

She felt a horrible sense of deja vu turning up at Chandler’s door like this, thinking back to how awful her last time here was. But if Chandler really was over her, maybe they could still be friends. It would have to be a slow process, because it broke her heart still to imagine being around Chandler when she found a new partner, but maybe she could do it. Billie sighed to herself, realising she was stalling and lifting her hand to knock three times on her ex girlfriend’s door.

Taking a few more deep breaths, she turned the door knob and pulled the door to her. As soon as she opened the door and saw her standing there, she was overcome with emotion, trying her best to keep them under wraps. She didn't know what sprung her sudden courage to rekindle things with Billie, but now it was turning her stomach.

The blonde stood there for what she felt was a moment too long before stepping aside so the other girl could come in. “Hey,” she said softly. While communication between them was nonexistent up until this point, Chandler found herself wanting to be around her as if nothing had happened. It would be nice to pretend things were back to normal and that her partner was back, but she felt that even if they resolved their issues here, the mending of their relationship wouldn’t happen as soon as she’d like.

Billie’s breath caught in her throat as the door opened and she looked at Chandler for the first time in months. For a moment it was almost like everything was normal, like it always had been between them, but there was still that pain and hurt she felt from being around her after everything that had happened. “Hey,” she said softly, wishing she could read minds so she could for once know what her ex-girlfriend was thinking.

Billie moved inside as Chandler stepped back, glancing around the apartment and noting the tiny changes that had probably happened naturally over the past six months. “How have you been?” she asked quietly, standing awkwardly in spot, not sure where Chandler wanted them to sit and talk, and no longer feeling like her apartment was the safe space it used to be. She couldn’t just wander in and sit down like it was her own place anymore. They were way past that comfort.

Chandler watched Billie as she walked in and stood in the middle of the living room. She watched her movements and tried to gauge her mood, something she knew she'd do a lot of throughout the evening. Although she was never great with words or body language, she was familiar enough with her ex to know if she wasn't comfortable. “I’ve been good. You?” She asked instinctively. Small talk rarely interested her but it gave her a moment to regather the thoughts that dissipated once she saw Billie’s face.

All those times Chandler spent crying in her bedroom, or the drunken nights she almost called Billie and invited her over came rushing back. And seeing her only confirmed that the torch she carried for her was still burning. It almost felt pathetic for her to feel the way she did, but what they had was special to her. Even if she acted as though their split didn’t phase her, she was just as much of a mess. “You can sit down if you’d like. I don’t think this conversation is one we should have standing up.” She said, heading towards the couch and sitting down.

“I’ve been... uhm, up and down, I feel like it’d be silly to lie and say I’ve been fine. But I am doing better, I guess. Otis has actually made a big difference, like having someone to take care of even if that someone is a dog,” she laughed slightly, still looking a bit out of place and uncomfortable. “He’s the best, and also an excuse to walk every day, which is always a good thing. I took him on a hike the other day and he was so good, I kept him on the leash the whole time but he seemed to have fun.” She didn’t mean to speak so much but sometimes she got chatty when she was nervous, and Otis really was like a fluffy little angel sent from above. He gave Billie a purpose in a way.

She was mildly aware she was trying to distract herself from the real reason she was here but Chandler’s next words promptly reminded her. She nodded and bit her lip slightly before moving to sit down on the sofa. “Well that doesn’t sound so good,” she tried to joke, cracking a smile but her eyes sad because she had come in expecting the worst. She couldn’t handle getting her hopes up when Chandler had given no indication that she still cared about her.

Although Chandler lacked the perfect emotions at times, Billie was always honest and open about hers, and that was one of the many reasons she loved her. Listening to her go on and on about the new addition to her life, Chandler caught a glimpse of the old Billie and it made her smile. “Maybe one day I’ll get to meet the little guy.” Her comment may have been a tad premature but she knew they’d be back in each other’s lives sooner or later, even if it wasn’t at the capacity she hoped for.

“It won’t be too bad.” Chandler had no idea how much truth that statement contained; she also had no idea how Billie would feel after learning the truth about why their relationship ended. “I know I’ve said this before, but just to reiterate the point, you were not the reason we broke up. I’m not saying that to spare your feelings, I really mean it when I say you were the perfect almost girlfriend I’ve ever had. And the reason we broke up is because I needed to work on myself,��� she said, nervously playing with her hands. “I know that sounds like a load of crap but it’s true. When we were dating I started to get in my head about how you could leave just like my birth parents, and I know I could have talked to you about it but I didn’t know how to. I also know that I shouldn’t think everyone is like them, but the only examples I’ve ever had of good relationships that aren’t family based aren’t real. And what we had was pretty perfect, which is why all I could think about was it going wrong somehow, and instead of properly dealing with those feelings I self sabotaged. With all that I hurt you and I’m sorry. It was extremely selfish, a horrible reason to break up with you, and I fully understand if you don’t forgive me, because I wouldn’t either.” She only ever had this conversation with herself, if she could even call it that, so she hoped it made sense.

"I'm sure you will," Billie replied, hoping it was true but also well aware that this entire thing was so complicated already and she still had no idea what Chandler had to say about it all. She was actually quite impressed with herself for not crying at the sight of her ex, which had to be an improvement, right? Maybe things would get better. Maybe they could be friends at some point, even if it wasn't right away. Billie still loved Chandler, and having spent six months without them, she knew she still wanted her in her life in some capacity.

She settled back into the sofa and turned her body to face Chandler, running a hand through her hair to push it back from her face. She remained quiet to let Chandler say what she needed to, not wanting to interrupt before the girl had fully explained, despite wanting to. Chandler had said from the beginning that it wasn't Billie's fault but she'd still put it all on herself anyway. She'd blamed herself for everything because why else would Chandler leave her? But then Chandler described her as *the most perfect girlfriend I've ever had* and those words had Billie's heart racing a little faster in her chest because if her ex was being honest it meant that she hadn't been nothing to her, in fact, she'd meant a lot. She had ducked her head as the other had started talking but she looked up now to meet her eyes, shuffling closer on instinct and taking Chandler's hand as Billie chewed at her bottom lip. She wasn't sure where to start, really. There was a lot to unpack and although Billie could understand where Chandler was coming from it still hurt like hell that she hadn't talked to her about this. "Okay," she said quietly, breathing out slowly, "I really fucking wish you'd just been honest with me from the beginning, though. Did you not feel able to talk to me about this? Because you did break my heart. I was head over heels in love with you and I'd always thought we were good at communicating with one another."

This was the first time she had ever explained why the two of them had split up, and even though she still thought it sounded like nonsense coming out of her mouth, it was nice to get it off her chest. With that behind her, she could feel a bit better knowing things could only go up from here. Right? It felt nice to be this close to Billie again. So taking advantage of this opportunity, Chandler slipped her fingers between her own and held on tight, hoping that she wouldn't let go. “There was no one I felt I could talk to about this.” Her grip loosened as the harsh reality of having broken her heart set in. “You were good at it. I don’t think I ever really was.” She wouldn’t say she kept secrets from Billie, but there were a few things she didn’t feel the need to talk about. It was no use making them both upset with her problems. “Also for your information, I was head over heels too. I merely got too overwhelmed with the idea of us not being together forever, and I wussed out. This being my first relationship ever I didn’t think talking to you about us breaking up was on the list of things to bring up. I didn’t want to jinx it by talking about it either, and I know that’s not smart, but neither am I.” A tad defeated, Chandler closed the remaining space between them and laid her head on Billie’s shoulder. The more she talked about this, the more she realized it could have been a mistake. What if all of this made them hate her even more? Maybe they would have been better off ignoring each other until one of them eventually moved out of town. The only thing she knew was she did not want to be the one crying after this ended.

Bille ducked her head as Chandler's hand tightened on hers, wanting to lean into the familiar touch, to move closer, but knowing she had to keep a handle on herself today. For once she needed to listen a little more to her head, and a little less to her heart. Although she'd never been very good at that, especially with Chandler involved. "I just... wish you'd said *something*," Bille murmured, chewing a little at the inside of her cheek. "And you don't need to make out like I was perfect in this relationship, Chandler. I know I'm not perfect, but I was trying. And the worst part about the whole thing was for me it felt like you weren't, like you'd just given up on me, like I wasn't worth it anymore and all those promises we'd made to each other just meant nothing." She couldn't hold herself back anymore and her free arm wound around her ex-girlfriend, holding her against her and sighing softly, her eyes sad still. "You know I think the key to a relationship is conversing. Talking to each other about shit we're going through because we're together and that means we go through that shit *together*, at least in my eyes. And I had absolutely no intentions to leave you, and I'm sorry you felt like that's how it would end, it makes me really sad to think you were thinking I would hurt you like that. But you realise how difficult that was for me, right? I know it seems like I'm open emotionally, and I am in relationships, yes, but every time I've had my heartbroken by someone it hurts a little bit more, because I let myself get vulnerable every time. And it's getting to the point where I'm fucking terrified of being vulnerable. When you broke up with me, I remember thinking *what's the fucking point* because if this is what happens every time I don't think I want another relationship. And it hurt more than it ever had before when I lost you, because you've always been different. You've always meant so much more to me."

For the moment, her hopes for their future were gone. Having hurt her that much, who knows what else would happen if she was given a second chance? Chandler didn't understand how she could be anything more than a friend to her after all that had happened. In order to keep her emotions in check, she decided to ignore them for now, and smiled softly as Billie held her close. Giving into temptation, she wrapped her arms around her ex-girlfriend and buried her face into her neck. After listening to Billie, she realized that she wasn't the one who deserved any comfort at this time, but she didn't know what to do. She thought back to Maisie's words about karma coming her way. Maybe not getting a second chance with Billie was it. Surely she could fix every mistake she'd ever made, if only she knew how, but the damage had already been done. In light of that, Chandler would forever regret her failure to make the minimum efforts to make their relationship work. There was nothing more she could do than try to be the best she could be to Billie, in whatever way she would allow her. Communication *is* the key to a happy relationship. And ironically, it was the very thing Chandler always pointed out in romcoms that would cause the relationship to fail that ended up ruining her own. “This is going to sound cheesy but, that’s what made you perfect to me. You gave me your all, and I’ll always love you for that.” She spoke, moving her head just enough for her voice to be heard. “I did exactly what I was afraid you’d do to me, but worse, and I understand that now. I know I've already said it and I will say it again as many times as I need to; I’m sorry. Even if it feels like a lie, I still love you and I’m sorry.” She wanted to offer up a way to fix it or say she wished she could have a second chance, yet neither of those options felt like enough for what she’d done.

Billie felt her heart fill as Chandler curled closer, and she reacted on instinct, leaning into her touch and relaxing. She'd spent months beating herself up for not being able to get over her but mere seconds in her arms and she felt like she was home again. The only thing was, they weren't partners anymore, and Chandler had really hurt her. That didn't mean that Billie didn't try her best to see the other woman's perspective though. She wanted to consider the other side to the story, the true reasoning behind all of this heartbreak. And when her ex said those words, and she realised that Chandler still loved her, she felt her breath catch in her throat, because hadn't that been her fear this entire time? Billie had thought Chandler had just fallen out of love with her, and she'd been holding onto a long dead, one-sided relationship for far too long. But what if that wasn't the case? What if Chandler was telling the truth? Billie shifted back, moving her hands to cup Chandler's face gently and tilt it up to meet her gaze. She breathed out shakily, biting at her bottom lip and trying her fucking hardest not to cry at the sight of her. Chandler was far too beautiful for her own good and Billie felt her heart ache with want. "You really still love me?" she managed to whisper after a brief hesitation, blinking through damp eyelashes. "Because you never seemed like-" she paused, her thumb brushing gently over the girl's cheek as she clenched her jaw slightly, "from where I sat it never seemed like you were that beaten up about us breaking up."

When she saw her ex's face, Chandler did her to keep her expression as neutral as possible, despite the thoughts in her head that were far from it. All of those old feelings that she would claim had subsided were right there on the surface. Sure, she hated herself for it, but this was the happiest she'd been in a long time. Chandler could feel herself losing what little control she had. In that moment she wanted to kiss her so badly, but that wasn't why she invited Billie over. It was only supposed to be a conversation, but there they were, wrapped around each other, faces inches apart. "It's not something that goes away. At least not for me." After taking Billie's question into account, she realized why she believed their relationship had ended. Closing her eyes once reality set in once again. Chandler was aware that she put up a facade after their breakup, yet she was not convinced she was fooling anyone. "Yeah, guess that's what happens when you repress your emotions." The months after their breakup weren't her proudest moments. It may have taken a while to convince herself, but Chandler began to believe that Billie would be better off without her. And that's when the Tinder dates and random hook ups happened. While she pretended their break-up wasn't the cause of the sudden changes in her behavior, she knew in her heart that it was. "Now do you believe me now when I say you had nothing to do with our break up?" She asked, softly smiling as her eyes returned to Billie's.

“It’s not something that goes away for me, either,” she whispered back, her hands still gently cupping Chandler’s face but shifting to put a tiny bit more space between them. She didn’t want to risk falling back into old comforts before they’d talked this out properly, and she knew if she stared into her eyes for much longer she wouldn’t be able to hold back from trying to kiss her. “I think I’ll always love you, no matter what happens. Even when loving you has hurt… but I’m sorry I was so focused on the rejection and its reflection on myself that I didn’t see… that I didn’t see through it. My insecurities made me lose sight of things and I regret that.” She slowly dropped her hands from Chandler’s face then, breathing out slowly and chewing at her bottom lip again. She reached for the other woman though, pulling Chandler over her lap and holding her against her. Billie’s head ducked down into Chandler’s neck now, her hand smoothing gently over her back. “I don’t know if I wholeheartedly agree I had nothing to do with it,” she mumbled softly, her body relaxing at the close proximity, the familiarity of the blonde’s touch. Billie had never loved any of her exes like she loved Chandler, and she knew that was worth a second chance if this was what her ex was insinuating. But she also knew that it couldn’t happen 100% right away. They needed to talk this through properly because she knew she couldn’t survive a second heartbreak from the woman she loved. “But I’m glad you told me this. I’m glad you wanted to talk.” She hesitated a moment and then leaned back in the sofa to meet Chandler’s gaze once more. “I need to ask though, what are you wanting from this talk? Do you just want to be my friend? Or are you… are you saying that you… that you want me again? Because I just… I just need to know what you want…”

Chandler shook her head in disbelief. Her attempt to get through to Billie was not as successful as she initially thought. "Apology not accepted, respectfully. The one who should apologize here is not you, Billie." She said, noticing the small change in her mood. But she chose to ignore it as she was being pulled into her lap, liking the change in positions. Without addressing any further rebuttals about the reason they broke up, Chandler snaked her arm behind Billie's back, laying her head on top of the brunette's. She inhaled deeply, taking in her scent and smiling sweetly.  She missed this. And she knew that once their conversation ended, she would miss it even more. "You deserved to know." The realization that Billie could give her another chance caused a wave of emotions to wash over her. "I..I..umm-" she stammered, feeling her heartbeat quicken. Her nerves may not be evident from her face, but her voice would definitely reveal them. The very thing she was hoping for, yet she was unsure how to react to it. If she knew then what she knew now, she would have reached out sooner. This talk is what they needed to get back to them, before all the arguing and the heartbreak. Even if things weren't entirely back to normal right away, Chandler knew they'd be better soon enough. "Having you back in my life in any capacity would be nice. Friends would be a great start, and as much as I want a second chance I don't think I deserve one," she stated truthfully. "But that's also not my choice to make. So if another shot is on the table, then I will take it and I promise not to break your heart again." She felt less afraid about taking on the role of her girlfriend now that she knew Billie was here to stay. Her eyes fell to her lips, then instinctively she licked her own before meeting her gaze.

Billie sighed softly at that response, lifting her hand to tuck a blonde hair back behind Chandler's ear, her other arm curled completely around her ex partner, holding her close. There was something so warm and familiar about this, something so comforting and *right* that meant Billie knew she wouldn't be able to say no to her, not completely, not when being together like this was something she'd been craving the entire time they'd been apart. There was a reason this heartbreak had hurt the most. Billie stilled believed in her heart that Chandler was *the one* for her.  She looked back up as she heard Chandler stammer slightly, her hand moving back to cup her cheek and smiling just softly, hoping it would comfort the other as she ran her thumb gently over her skin. "I don't really want to be friends," Billie admitted quietly, honestly, noticing the glance down at her lips and instead of giving in to that perfect pull, she leaned in to rest her forehead against Chandler's. "Because you're always going to be more than just a friend to me, Chandler. But... but if we do this again, we need to go slow. I need to learn to trust you again." Her free arm moved to stroke gently up and down her ex partner's back as she ducked her eyes down, having felt like she was losing herself a little in Chandler's beautiful, blue eyes. "And I need to know that if you want to be with me, that you genuinely want to be my partner, my girlfriend. Or at least that you'll be able to call me your girlfriend at some point. I'm in this because I want it to last forever, because I love you. I just can't do it one-sided."

Chandler softened every time Billie cupped her cheek, blushing a little more with every touch. When Billie was behind them, even the smallest of actions were enough to send her into a tizzy. "You mean you don't want to be *just* friends. Because you're gonna be my friend even if we get together." Her nose scrunching up as she teased. For a while, she feigned a smile as she thought about how to respond. *Forever*. Who knew her certainty could be shaken by one word? Chandler could feel the lump forming in her throat as she contemplated all the what-ifs and worst-case scenarios in her head. She had relapsed into her old ways for a split second. Listening to the negative thoughts in her head instead of following her heart to her heart. Making herself feel bad about what could be the best decision of her life. Her gaze shifted to Billie and, seeing her face made Chandler light up. What was she doing? She wanted this and, she wasn't going to let anything get in the way this time. "I'll admit I'm scared, but being your girlfriend would be the best possible outcome to us starting over." With a nod, she drowned out the tiny voice in her head. She was doing this, and hopefully better this time. "But if we're taking it slow, could you try your hardest to avoid giving me those kiss me eyes? I'm really trying my best to keep it together here." She huffed, slightly nudging Billie with her forehead. Their time together would be a true test of her patience if they spent it this way. It wasn't that Chandler didn't love being cuddled up with Billie daily, but she could only handle so much before she overstepped.

Bille brightened at the other woman's rewording of what she had said because it was so true. They'd always been friends *and* partners, never just one or the other, and it was a big part of why Chandler had left such a hole in her life when they broke up. Billie continued to gently pet at her cheek as the girl's expression faltered, she needed Chandler to know that she was here now and would always be so long as she was still wanted. She hated the idea that Chandler had just been scared and unable to voice her fears to anyone. She'd always wanted to be *everything* for her, and perhaps accepting that you can't be *everything* for someone was important in this. "Do you want to talk more about what you're scared about?" she asked anyway, meeting Chandler's gaze once more and biting at her bottom lip, wanting her to know that she could talk to her if she wanted to. She couldn't hold in her soft chuckle at her next words though, Billie's eyes crinkling as she smiled and gently kissed the corner of Chandler's mouth, barely a brush of lips but hopefully enough to convey how much she still loved and adored her. "Kissy eyes?" she whispered as she pulled back just a little, tilting her head. "I didn't realise I was doing any such thing," she teased softly, but the reality was that Billie wanted nothing more than to kiss her properly again.

Chandler liked that they could slip back into their old ways. Obviously,  some things were different now but they were close enough to the same for things to be less than awkward between them. "Just the usual what if I mess up again stuff. It's not anything worth talking about right now, but I've gotten better with expressing my feelings when they're *really* bothering me, so you won't have to worry about me keeping anything from you this time."In retrospect, she probably shouldn't have kept them to herself the first time, but she'd always prefer dealing with her problems alone, even though it was ineffective. When Billie grazed her lips against hers, Chandler let out an exaggerated gasp. "That was unfair and you know it." She thought about getting revenge but she decided she'd behave herself for now. From now on, they'd see each other more often, so she had plenty of time to get her back. Opting for a kiss on the cheek instead, she then moved out of her lap and sat next to her. "But I think we should call it a night." She said, her hands reaching out to take hers. If Chandler had her way, she would ask Billie to stay over, but she knew that wouldn't be a good thing, no matter how much either of them might want to prolong this visit.

Billie bit her tongue, holding herself back from pushing for more from Chandler. She wanted to make things better, to fix everything for her so they could be completely happy together forever but she also knew that it wasn't realistic to think like that, to expect to be able to solve everyone's problems when she still had plenty of her own to contend with. Besides, a good relationship shouldn't be about solving problems, but instead about being there, side by side, throughout them all. At least that's what Billie thought. She chuckled at the reaction from the soft kiss to the corner of her lips, knowing why the other woman had gasped because there was nothing Billie would love more than to pull her close and kiss her properly. She missed how close they used to be, and naturally, a lot of that comfort that they'd built together still remained. "I'm not trying to tease you," Billie said honestly, once again brushing her thumb over Chandler's cheek but smiling softly as she pulled back, squeezing her hands and nodding. "But I do think you're right. It's late and I've got work tomorrow morning anyway... Can I call you? Can we do something soon? Together?"

Chandler understood Billie's need to help, but there were some things beyond her control. Neither of them could predict how their relationship would turn out and that's what scared her the most. Not knowing something as big as this left her with a tinge of doubt, and she was aware she couldn't know everything, yet it failed to set well with her. The difference this time was that she felt capable of handling her fear of the unknown. And she knew letting herself be happy instead of worrying about how things could go wrong was a better idea than any. She knew relationships weren't supposed to be perfect. Chandler knew they would have some ups and downs, but at least she was now confident she could tell her friend anything - good or bad. She knew Billie meant well, and she understood the necessity of taking things slowly, but it didn't help make any of this easier. "Yes, yes, and absolutely." She replied, as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and glanced over at Billie with a soft smile.

Billie smiled back at that, leaning closer to pull Chandler into a tight hug, and enjoying the comfort she hadn’t been able to before. Billie had always been someone who enjoyed physical affection, whether that be hugging her friends and family or holding her partner. And she couldn’t deny that she was nervous about what could happen because Chandler once again had Billie’s heart held precariously between her hands. But she was willing to give that over if she got to experience being loved by Chandler Pierce again. That was ultimately worth any heartbreak and hurt. Chandler was the one for her, and these six months apart had been more painful than she was willing to admit, even to Maisie, though she knew her best friend may not be super accepting straight away of the idea of this relationship rekindling.  “I could cook for you, maybe. Or we could go out for a meal,” Billie suggested as she pulled back, her eyes crinkling as she smiled again. “I can’t remember which days I’m working but I’ll call and we... we can figure it all out.” She took Chandler’s hands then and nodded, squeezing them gently before standing. “Can I just say... I really hope you can trust me when I say this relationship is so important to me. I wouldn’t be giving this a second chance usually but I can’t not. I’m not going anywhere unless you genuinely don’t want me around, so please try not to worry about that. This is real and I know we work perfectly together, despite our ups and downs, there’s no one else in this world I’d rather commit to.”

"Both are great ideas. And who knows? Maybe before you realize this was all a big mistake we'll get to do both." She had a teasing tone, but there was some truth in what she said. In most cases, Chandler was always optimistic, so why was she not in this situation? Experiencing ups and downs like this had her feeling like she was on an emotional roller coaster. While Billie's ways of sharing her feelings with her should have proven that her heart was in good hands, it still failed to quiet the nagging voice in the back of her head. The voice that made her think of all the bad ways this could end. At the very least, she could say she tried, even if they didn't work out. "You're perfect, Billie." As she stood up, her hands moved to cup Billie's face, momentarily studying her face. Chandler could tell the brunette until she was blue in the face how amazing she was, but knowing their break-up didn't help her insecurities, it might take a while for her to accept it. Sighing softly, Chandler rested her hands on her ex's shoulders. She desperately missed how affectionate Billie had been, and if it were possible she would spend the rest of the night in her arms. "I want nothing more than for you to be around all the time, and if you think we're meant to be then there must be some truth to that. I'm not worried at all about anything *you're* going to do. I completely understand you giving us another shot is a privilege, and I'm hoping you can trust me not to make a mess of this a second time." Having already been through so much heartache, and hearing Billie say they were meant to be together, Chandler did not want to risk having the same problem again.

"We *will* get to do both, and much more," Billie said confidently, despite having her fears still in the back of her mind she wanted them to both think as positively about this as they could. Relationships were never easy but she knew she was willing to put in the work this time to make the most of their second chance together. Billie found herself flushing slightly in her cheeks as Chandler spoke then, shaking her head slightly at the idea of her being perfect, but smiling softer as the other woman cupped her face gently in her hands. Billie turned her eyes to meet Chandler's gaze, her arm looping around her partner's waist as she felt her hands settle on her shoulders. Were they partners now? Billie held back her tongue to ask, knowing the specifics weren't important in this moment. They were going slow anyway. "I think there is some truth to it," she said, her eyes crinkling a little as she smiled wider. "More than just some, actually. And although it might take us a little time to trust each other again I want to do it, for you, for us." She pulled back reluctantly then, taking Chandler's hand to pull her over with her as she moved toward the door, not wanting to be far from her now that she didn't have to avoid her. "I'll call you tomorrow," she repeated again, squeezing her ex's hand and leaning in to kiss her cheek before reaching to open the door. "I love you and I'll see you soon."

"I can't wait!", she exclaimed. Chandler knew she needed to be in a more optimistic mindset about them if she wanted their relationship to work. The blonde never understood what Billie saw in her; to be honest, and she was self-conscious about asking, but she would show the brown-eyed girl she was worth it. It'd be crazy for her to not give her all given this second chance because she loved Billie and Billie loved her. How could she know for sure they weren't meant to be together if she never gave them a try?  She had no idea what their relationship would be like now, but she was glad they could now talk to one another again. No more avoiding each other to escape the possible awkwardness. And they may not have completely trusted each other, yet their body language suggested otherwise. In Billie's arms, she was reminded of how much she missed being around her ex-girlfriend. "I love you too, and yes you will. Pretty, pretty, *pretty* please text me when you get home." She said, smiling sweetly at her before closing the door behind her. She wanted things to get back to normal but she knew it would take time for either of them to get to that point. Chandler was a little hesitant about everything but was happy that they were taking things slowly.

[brookeap3]

Post-its and Paperclips 4th of July

A/N: Also a tad late, but I hope it's worth it. This is a feelsy, flirty, fluff fest all around. Done for Prompt #11 Regina mothering Roland (it’d be awesome if Robin witnessed at least a part of the scene) of @oqpromptparty Enjoy :)

{ ffn } { ao3 }

The day is blistering hot, sun baking down on them, heat radiating from their pores, sweat pooling down their backs. But it doesn’t matter much. It’s a holiday. 4th of July. A day of independence and patriotism. Sunshine and beer. Friends and laughter. And that’s exactly what she has been blessed with this year.

John is hosting a backyard barbeque. Apparently, it’s been a tradition among Robin and his friends since they were in college. Robin tells her about the summers they’d gone to his friend’s family’s cabin for the holiday while they’re cuddled in bed one morning discussing possible plans. Days spent on the lake and shooting arrows in the woods. Until John had lost his parents and they’d had to sell the cabin. It’d been a hard time for all of them, but they’d gotten each other through it.

Despite that, they’ve managed to keep the tradition alive all these years, and Regina is thrilled to be included in the fun. She’s never really had this in her life. Not before she met Robin, before he’d welcomed her into his life with open arms.

Independence Day had always been a very proper affair for her growing up, sophisticated soirees at the club, surrounded by a hundred of her mother’s “closest friends”. Cold and detached. There’d been no laughter or joy as there should be on this holiday, an unfortunate fact that had continued into Regina’s adult life even after she’d gotten out from under her mother’s thumb. But all of that is changing now.

This year she’d gotten to sleep in, to take advantage of the rare occasion where Gold allows them a day away from the office in the name of history and celebration. Though, she wouldn’t be surprised to find at least a dozen emails from him if she or Robin were to check their email. Regina’s not going to think about work at all today, though. She woke to sunlight streaming in through the curtains and a post-it on the bedside lamp.

Took Roland to John’s to help set up. See you there, love. Don’t forget your bikini ;)

It had made her chuckle as Regina snuggled down into her pillow for another minute and grinned stupidly at the tiny little square of paper. The way her heart had  fluttered over a silly note, all of the silly notes Robin leaves her, had made her feel like a foolish school girl, but she wouldn’t change it for the world. It’s simply become what they do and it’s cute and adorable, just like the man she loves.

She’d gotten dressed quickly, settling on a pair of crisp white shorts and a red v-neck shirt, had slipped on her navy and white striped bikini beneath, just as Robin’d requested, and had smirked as she tied the knot around her neck. She may or may not get into the pool, but she can certainly torment him with the knowledge she’s wearing very little beneath her clothes.

Then she’d been off, heading down the block to where John’s house resides, and Regina can hear the dull hum of people chatting and laughing already as she slips through the side gate and rounds the house to the backyard.

Rather impressed, Regina takes in the way that they’ve transformed the usually lackluster view. There are red, white, and blue streamers strung all around, wrapped around the trees, through the railing of the deck. Tiny American flags line the edge of the backyard along the fence and they’ve set up a long, patriotic clad table as a sort of buffet for food and drink along one edge. The pool is bright and clear, a few of John’s friends splashing around with beers in their hands as they laugh and float in the water, along with the smattering of kids joining them in play.

She spots the man himself, standing around the currently empty fire pit, chatting with a woman Regina assumes is the one she’s heard he’s been seeing, but hasn’t yet met and smirks as her gaze wanders around, looking for her significant other and his little boy.

It’s no more than a minute later that a tiny ball of wild energy and bouncing brown curls dashes out of the screen door with a whoop, clad in only his Lightning McQueen swim trunks and his inflatable swimmies.

“Roland! No running by the pool!” Robin’s voice calls out in warning, causing the little boy to skid to a stop and turn around sheepishly, muttering a, Sorry, Daddy! before turning on his heel and quickly striding to the edge of the pool where he jumps straight in, kicking at the water until he reaches a boy with chestnut colored hair who looks to be about a year or two older than Roland.

Their little fish, Regina thinks to herself, grinning as she watches him flap about. They don’t have too much to be worried about, with his inflatable arm bands ensuring he can splash around to his heart’s content, but Robin still stands there and watches him with a cautious parental eye.

His attention shifts to her when he catches her moving toward him and a deep, dimpled grin breaks out over his face, the one that never fails to make Regina’s heart trip over in her chest. “Hello, milady.” Robin greets her, reaching out a hand to grip her hip and leaning down for a quick smooch.

“Hi,” she responds in kind, hooking an arm around the back of his waist. “Quite the shindig you’ve got going here. Is it always like this?”

Robin’s eyes scan around the crowded yard, notes Will in the corner of the deck, fiddling with the music coming from the speaker on the railing, Ana rearranging the ice in the cooler that houses their soda and beers for the day, while Tuck and his neighbor toss a rice filled sack back and forth on the corn hole boards. There are neighbors and friends scattered all around, and the grin on Robin’s face becomes even wider as he tells her, “Yeah. We like to go all out.”

“I can see that,” Regina responds in amusement.

Robin squeezes her to his body, thrilled that he gets to share this with her this year. Another holiday they get to spend together, as a couple, building a life together. They’re racking them up and he’s never been happier. “Come on,” he says, jerking his head in the direction of their host, “I’ll introduce you to John’s new girlfriend. He’s positively smitten.”

Following Robin across the swishing grass, hands joined together, Regina can’t help but chuckle quietly as she gets a better look at Robin’s best friend and the gorgeous woman with her arm threaded through his. She’s tall and slender, has lovely dark chocolate skin and pretty features that remind her a bit of a wood nymph.

“Regina! You made it!” John calls happily, goofy grin on his face as he waves his free hand widely in a gesture of greeting. He’s got a beer in his hand and she pauses briefly, wonders how many he’s had already, but says nothing as she laughs and steps in to give him a kiss on the cheek.

She and John have become friends of a sort over the last few months, her affection for the hulk of a man exceeding beyond his involvement in Robin and Roland’s life. They banter with one another and never pass up an opportunity to tease and embarrass the other if the occasion arises, but it’s all in good fun. Frankly, she kind of considers him to be a bit of an older brother. Yet another thing she’s never had in her life that she’s now been blessed with.

“I’d like you to meet Tiana,” he tells her proudly, face split into a huge smile as he beams down at the woman beside him. Next to John, she looks positively petite and adorable. A total contrast in her pretty blue sundress with bright red posies splashed across the material to John’s own plain white t-shirt, frayed along the edges, and dark jeans, but they look cute together.

Smiling, Regina offers her a hand, “Nice to meet you, I’m Regina.”

“Robin’s girlfriend,” Tiana supplies automatically, taking Regina’s offered hand and shaking it. “I’ve heard a lot about you. It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“Likewise,” Regina replies. Her eyes dart back and forth between the two of them and she asks, “Tell me how you two met again?”

“She makes the best damn beignets in the entire world.” John’s answer is immediate and Regina has to fight a snicker, sharing an amused look with Robin from the corner of her eye.

Luckily, Tiana expands upon that to explain, “I own a bakery not far from here. Specializes in cajun desserts. My mama and I used to live in New Orleans when I was younger, before we moved to Boston for her job. I haven’t been able to get the taste for southern cooking out of my system.”

Her stomach grumbles at the mere mention of it, and Regina suddenly becomes very aware of the fact she’s yet to eat anything today. Something she’ll have to rectify soon but keeps her attention on Tiana as she continues her story.

“This one,” she tips her face up to grin at John, “Used to come in every other day and sample half the menu. Plus a beignet. Sometimes two or three.” There’s a wealth of affection in the tone, and Regina’s taken at once with the enraptured expression on both their faces. He’s looking at her as if she were sunshine itself and it’s not something she’s seen before. Honestly, it’s rather adorable. “It took him over two months to finally ask me out.” Tiana finishes, glancing back to Regina and Robin.

Her response is quick and teasing as she comments, “Only that long? Must be true love,” and grins playfully at John.

He harrumphs, narrowing his eyes at her. “But she said yes at that point,” John jokes, his belly shaking as he grins down at his girlfriend and captures her mouth in a kiss, making her giggle.

“Alright, alright, I can’t take much more of this sickeningly sweet exchange.” Robin interjects, shaking his head, obviously teasing.

Smirking, John responds, “Takes one to know one, mate. Now you know what you looked like trailing after Regina with stars in your eyes for months after Christmas.”

His gaze shifts from the pair in front of him to the love of his life, catching the slight blush that rises up the back of her neck. Robin’s hand reaches for her own again and uses it to tug her body flush against his, wrapping his arms around her waist. “Yes, well, I’m clearly the luckiest man on the planet.” Bending his neck forward, Robin pecks a kiss to Regina’s mouth, enjoying the fruity flavor of her chap stick against his lips. Then he’s turning his attention back to John and Tiana and informing them, “Now if you’ll excuse us, I think it’s time we find ourselves some of those burgers and crisps.”

Then he’s dragging her toward the tantalizing scents of corn on the cob and patties frying from the grill, carefully manned by Tuck now that they’ve finished their game, and Regina’s mouth waters in gratitude.  

He stops a few yards away at the end of the long row of tables piled with food. “May I offer you some refreshments, milady?” Robin asks her with a flourish, popping open the cooler and waving his hand at the various bottles and cans nestled in among the pounds of ice. They’ve got pop and water, some lemonade for the kiddos and adults not partaking in alcoholic indulgences, and enough beer to last them through the next several hours.

Leaning in closer so he can whisper into her ear, enjoying the slight shiver that racks her body, Robin adds, “I heard talk of firing up the blender for margaritas as well, if you’d prefer.” Robin has a pretty good idea of what she’ll choose and isn’t disappointed when he sees Regina’s eyes light up as she requests, A margarita. Definitely.

Chuckling, Robin tells her he’ll be back in a moment, wanders inside and spies Ana at the kitchen counter measuring and blending ingredients. It isn’t long before he’s back out in the baking sun, offering Regina a festive, blue plastic glass they’d picked up at the party store for today.

“My savior,” Regina jokes, winking at him in that squinty way of hers that makes him want to kiss her because it’s so damn adorable. Always.

So he does just that. Angles his mouth over hers after she takes a sip and hums her delight with the drink. He can taste the salt on her lips, licks a few crystals off with the tip of his tongue, mixing with the sweetness of the alcohol and Regina. Robin’s hand slides smoothly up the back of her spine to the nape of her neck and he tugs lightly at the bikini tie peeking out over the collar of her shirt. “I see you took my suggestion.”

Regina smirks, that teasing look in her eye that Robin’s become accustomed to. “It seemed wise.” Her voice drops into a low, arousing timbre as she adds, “If for no other reason than to tease you all day.”

Images of her clad in the bikini she’d worn a few weeks ago when they’d come over for a lazy Sunday afternoon with Roland filter through Robin’s mind. Her wet and glistening from the pool, drying off with the sun reflecting off every inch of her perfect body. He’s been unable to get the vision from his mind since and he grins naughtily at her. “Now that’s just unfair. Torturing a man that way,” Robin groans.

Regina takes another long sip of her drink, tipping her head back slightly to do so and distracting him while he watches the muscles in her throat quiver as the cool liquid slides down it. As she licks her lips and takes a step closer to him, resting her hand just above his heart and scratching her nails over his cotton shirt, Robin struggles to focus on anything other than the way he wants her. Now is not the time.

It proves to be a difficult task as she replies tauntingly, “But it’s so much fun to torture you.”  

Robin shakes his head, hooks one of his fingers through the belt loop of her shorts and tugs her body the few scant inches between them until their torsos are touching. His mouth presses against her ear, muttering, “Minx,” into it before he sinks his teeth into the lobe and trails the tip of his tongue around the shell.

It’s not entirely appropriate for a backyard barbeque, but, well, he’s a weak man where Regina Mills is concerned and his willpower is lacking. But he’s so happy. It’s actually really rather ridiculous. That one could feel this content in his life. He has his son and loyal friends, the most incredible woman at his side, and Robin can’t think of a better way to celebrate the birth of the country he’s come to call his own than exactly what they’re doing.

Regina giggles, tilting her head back with a pointed look and a muttered, “Behave,” but she doesn’t shift away from him. Instead, she takes a large gulp from her glass, drinking up the rest of her margarita, catching up a bit with everyone else that had started before her. “And this is excellent,” she adds, lifting her now nearly empty glass in a salute.

“I’ll tell Ana you said so,” Robin grins. “Will’s been teaching her to bartend.”

“Well he’s doing a damn fine job of it. She might just give Ella a run for her money, and that’s saying something.”

Robin chuckles, “How about I go get you another one of those margaritas, it might warm you up to the idea of a dip in the water,” he adds, wiggling his eyebrows at her suggestively and making her laugh, “while you fill yourself a plate of some of this delicious smelling food?”

The corner of her mouth tips up, “I think that’s an excellent idea.” And Regina giggles silently as she watches Robin’s retreating back head into the house once again, turning toward the table clad with stars and stripes cookware and decorations, and laden with food.

“Hey, Regina,” Mulan greets her as she offers her a paper plate. “Happy Fourth!”

“You, too!” Regina replies, smiling happily as she and the brunette chat for a few minutes, catching up since the last time she’d seen her. She and Aurora have been busy moving into a new apartment and she’d just changed jobs a few weeks ago.

Then it happens.

It’s the worst sound she’s ever heard. The miserable wail of the little boy that’s stolen her heart out from under her without any conscious effort. Regina turns instantly from where she’s piling watermelon and potato chips on her plate to scan the backyard for Roland. She sees him over by the cement border surrounding the pool, clutching his knee to his chest, face scrunched up in pain as tears rain down his cheeks.

Her heart catches in her throat, stopping dead before picking up once more in a rapid staccato as she abandons the patriotic themed paper plate and dashes quickly across the yard to his side. “Roland, baby, what happened?” she questions immediately, crouching down beside him, drawing him into her lap as she sits on the burning concrete.

“I— I—waaas chasing— Michael and— I—  tri— tripped,” he just barely hiccups out, voice wobbly and thick as he buries his face into the crook of her neck. He’s all wet from the pool, dampening Regina’s shorts and shirt as she cradles him to her, Roland still holding his knee tightly to his chest, whimpering, and it breaks her heart.

“Oh, baby, it’s okay. It’s going to be alright. Why don’t you let me take a look?” When Roland only shakes his head and snuggles in closer to her side, Regina lets out a imperceptible sigh. Her hand rubs soothing passes up and down his back as she urges once more, “Come on, Roland. I promise I’ll be very gentle.” Her tone is soft and soothing, motherly.

Reluctantly, he relents, uncovers his wound to allow Regina to give it a once over. Once she has a clear view of the injury, the vice like grip around her heart loosens ever so slightly. It’s just a scratch. Not even that deep from what she can tell, but it’s bleeding pretty heavily and she’s certain it smarts for such a little boy. Tiny rivulets of blood slide down from his knee and over his shin, mixing with the chlorine droplets clinging to his skin.

Taking a deep breath, Regina smiles down at him lovingly, brushes his wet curls back from his face and assures him, “See, it’s not so bad. Just a little cut.”

“It— it hurts,” Roland whines and Regina’s heart clenches in her throat at his wobbly tone.

“I know it does, baby,” she tells him, her fingers resting gingerly just beside the wound on his knee. “How about we go and get this cleaned up, and I’ll kiss it better. Then we can get you a popsicle. Does that sound good?” Regina asks him, willing to do anything to ease his hurts.

Roland bites his lower lip, fat tears resting on his eyelashes, and looks just like Robin as he does so, but he answers softly, “Okay, R’gina.” She lets out a breath of relief and moves to stand with him still in her arms, done with a level of skill far too natural for someone that’s not technically his mother, and turns toward the house.

That’s when she spots Robin just coming out of the backdoor, stilled where he stands, her fresh margarita glass in hand, watching them with a mixture of concern and adoration in his eyes. But she doesn’t stop long enough to consider it beyond a passing thought, simply asks him as they meet, “Will you grab the first aid kit?”

He nods, cupping the back of Roland’s head for a moment and asking, “Did we take a tumble, my boy?” Roland nods from where he has his head tucked against her neck, body curled into hers. “Well, it’s lucky we have Regina here to take care of you, isn’t it?” He mumbles a tiny, mmhmm, as an answer and a small smile tips up the corners of her mouth.

Once they’re inside, Regina settles Roland onto the toilet seat in the bathroom, kneeling down so she’s at eye level with him and can tap an index finger beneath his chin. “Let’s get you all patched up, sir.” It makes Roland giggle a little and Regina smiles as she tears off a few squares of toilet paper and dabs lightly over his broken skin, cleaning away the blood that’s already started to clot and slow. “You know you’re not supposed to be running around the pool, Roland. It’s wet and slick and that’s how we fall and get hurt.” Regina scolds him softly.

Pouting, Roland sniffles and answers, “I know. I’m sorry, R’gina. Michael and I were playing tag and I wanted to catch him.”

She sighs, “That’s fine, but you could have gotten really hurt, Roland, and I don’t want that. So no more running by the pool, is that clear?”

Roland nods solemnly, his gradually drying curls bouncing against his face just as Robin clears his throat from the doorway, holding out the white first aid kit. Regina reaches for it, muttering a quiet thanks as he looks down on them. There’s something in his expression, the way he’s looking at the two of them still that makes her blood pound quicker through her veins. But she ignores it for a moment, focused on Roland as she takes an alcohol wipe and a waterproof band aid from the kit and gets to work.

When his cut is all clean and she’s blown softly on the wound to soothe the stinging and fresh bout of tears that well in Roland’s eyes from the antiseptic, Regina smears a bit of neosporin over it and covers it with the band aid, leaning down and pressing a light kiss to his knee while grinning up at him. “There. All better.”

Roland smiles, his tiny dimples little pin points in his cheeks, and exclaims, “Thanks, R’gina,” bouncing up and tossing his arms around her neck for a hug. All the pain and tears forgotten with the resiliency of a child as he asks if he can have his popsicle now.

“Why don’t you go on back outside and see if Ana will get you one?” Regina chuckles, standing and ignoring the creaky ache of her own joints after being crouched for so long. He starts to dart out of the bathroom and Regina’s voice warns sharply, “Walk, Roland.”

Then it’s just her and Robin. No longer distracted by Roland’s injury, she can fully focus her attention on him and Regina blushes slightly at the worshipful glint in his eyes. He reaches out a hand for hers, Regina placing her own in his palm, and pulls her flush against his body in a practiced move, leaning down to rest his forehead against hers. “You’re wonderful with him.” Robin exhales, his warm breath ghosting over her lips, making Regina shiver.

She jerks her shoulder in a little shrug, replying, “He makes it easy.”

Drawing back enough so that he can meet her eyes, Robin shakes his head. “No, you’re just so natural with him. He’s never really had a motherly figure in his life and was so young when Marian passed…” Robin pauses, as if gathering his thoughts before he continues. “I’m just so grateful he has you now.”

It nearly makes Regina cry, her eyes watering precariously as she tries to control the fierce tide of emotions that suddenly swamp her. She’d never really thought of herself as mother material before, not until Roland had snuck into her world and captured her heart with post-its and paperclips and insistent holiday traditions. They’ve come a long way in the last six months, have become closer than she ever thought possible and there’s no denying what she feels.

“I love him so much,” she chokes out wetly, heart squeezing inside her chest.

Robin’s fingers thread through her hair, cupping her cheek as he tells her, “He loves you. I love you,” before lowering his mouth to hers in a sweet, gentle kiss. It’s nothing passionate, just a soft press of his lips to hers. Firm and slow. But it’s everything.

“I love you, too,” Regina replies, voice thick with emotion when they pull away.

Nuzzling his nose against hers for another minute, Robin strokes his hands down her arms before saying, “We should probably get back to the party.” His voice drops, taking on that tone that always has her body quivering in anticipation. “Even if I would rather sneak off with you to one of the guest rooms upstairs.”

He wiggles his eyebrows at her suggestively and Regina laughs. “Tempting as that is, I think it might be best we go supervise your son.”

Robin chuckles in response, but bows his head in concession, gesturing for her to lead the way even as the word ours echos through his mind.

. . .

The dusky darkness of twilight settles around them. It's getting closer and closer to ten o’clock, when the city fireworks are scheduled to start going off. Luckily, John’s house is positioned perfectly to witness the show without them having to deal with the hassle of shuffling an entire party of people out of the house to the park, finding parking, and navigating their way through the crowd. This is much better and decidedly more intimate.

Regina’s curled up on Robin’s lap in one of the chairs around the fire pit, the flames crackling and giving off just enough of a heat to kiss along her skin in the chilly summer evening. Her head rests on his shoulder, fingers stroking absently up and down his forearm that rests over her thighs as his hand mirrors her movements up and down her spine.

It’s been a lovely day, perfect.

As much as Regina wishes it wasn’t coming to an end, she’s sleepy. Is ready to tuck Roland in for the night and then curl up in Robin’s bed with him and drift off to dreamland. They’re watching him play with a few of the other kids, his new best friend, Michael, among them, tossing firecrackers against the cement and shrieking when they pop and echo in the night. John and Tiana are lighting sparklers and letting the kids play with them until they fizzle out.

That hand that had been rubbing up and down her back, tangles in the edges of her hair as Robin presses a kiss to the crown of her head and asks quietly, “You gonna make it to the fireworks, love?”

He can feel the weight of her limbs atop his, relaxed and content. Just as he is. It’s been an exhausting day, between the heat and overstimulation, not to mention Roland’s little mishap earlier, but Robin isn’t quite ready for it to be over so soon.

Just a little while longer to hold onto the magic of the holiday. That’s all he wants.

Regina’s sleepy response, a mumbled, mmhmm, makes him grin, placing another light kiss to her brow and tightening his arms around her. For the next ten minutes they stay just as they are, eyes closed and breathing in time with one another as they listen to the sounds of the party winding down around them.

The fireworks will start any minute now, after which, he and Regina will gather Roland up, dragging him away from his new friends, and will spend the following half hour getting him ready for bed. Robin supervising the brushing of his teeth as Regina pulls out his pajamas, the both of them listening intently as he repeats every second of his day, even though they’d been there for all of it. Gradually getting him to settle down so he can sleep.

Despite her exhaustion, Robin knows Regina will climb into Roland’s tiny toddler bed with him and weave a tale of magic and mischief until his eyelids droop and his breathing evens out. Just as she’s done with him nearly every night for the past two months. Hardly ever misses it.

Except on the now rare occasion she ends up sleeping at her own house rather than theirs, that is.

The thought makes Robin frown slightly. Granted, over the last several months they’ve been spending less and less nights apart. More out of habit than conscious thought, really.

But now that he's thinking about it, half of his closet holds her clothes, their shirts mingled together and two of his dresser drawers serve as a home to her things. Her essentials are scattered over his bathroom. The cream she slathers on her face every night and tubes and brushes of this and that for her to get ready in the morning. The fancy water she prefers stocked next to Roland’s juice boxes in the fridge. She’s practically living there.

Robin’s eyes open, glancing down at Regina where her head is tucked against the curve of his neck and shoulder, breathing evenly. Snippets of their day flutter through his memory, the sense of absolute rightness he'd felt as he'd watched Regina kiss away Roland's hurts, the ease with which she'd mingled with his friends, knowing they'd end up just as they are now. How his heart had swelled with love as he'd kissed her brow and left her sleeping soundly in his bed this morning.

It hits him suddenly, a culmination of all the little moments that have become second nature in the last six months, that that's exactly what he wants for their future. Waking up together, their possessions finding homes beside one another, Roland knowing the woman he worships will be there to pick him up whenever he falls.

Robin’s head over heels in love with her, and there's absolutely no reason that they shouldn't go for it. Shouldn't make that leap.

“Regina,” he murmurs, nudging her slightly and brushing a few errant strands of hair from her face as she stirs and looks up at him from beneath her lashes.

“Hmmm?”

He grins at the sleepy tone, fingertips dancing along her bicep. “I want to ask you something, love.”

That makes her sit up a little bit straighter in his lap, meeting his gaze as she nods, curious expression on her face, a little scrunch to her nose and that crinkle between her brows he finds adorable. “What is it?” Her gaze flickers around her, blinking the sleep from her eyes from the little catnap she'd been taking against him.

Inhaling sharply, Robin asks, “Would you consider moving in with me? And Roland. Full time. No more occasional nights apart.” He smiles at her, fingers playing with the tips of her hair just brushing the tops of her shoulders. “I want us to start a life together, officially.”

He’s babbling, his voice a bit sheepish, nerves unexpectedly bouncing around in his stomach. It’s silly. It’s not like he’s proposing marriage, not yet anyway (though the thought has crossed his mind a time or two). Besides, she’s practically living with them already, his question is really just a formality. Surely, she'll agree. Still, his stomach gurgles and swoops in his gut as he waits for her answer.

For a moment, she looks stunned, taken aback, and Robin worries that perhaps he's overstepped some boundary. That she might not be quite as ready to fully and completely share her life and space with he and his son as he thought.

Then the most stunning smile he's ever seen grace her features erupts and she's laughing, winding her arms around his neck and looking at him like he's said the most foolish thing in the world, but she answers immediately. “Yes,” shaking her head at him, Regina leans in and kisses him hard, fusing their lips together for a solid minute before pulling away. “Yes, I would love to move in with you and Roland. Though you might regret that when you see the entirety of my shoe collection,” she jokes.

“Never,” Robin replies without hesitation, heart swelling as he laughs and swoops in to take her mouth with his again.

The loud and earth shattering boom of the first fireworks explode in the night sky above them at precisely that moment. Bursts of colors and sparks flying and dissolving into nothing but smoke wafting through the atmosphere.

Regina and Robin chuckle against each other’s mouths, tipping their foreheads against one another as Roland’s shout of excitement sounds from across the yard, and he runs over to where they’re seated. He climbs into Regina’s lap immediately, no regard for how she’s perched on Robin’s at all, and she and Robin grin at each other.

Wrapping his arms around the both of them, Robin sighs contentedly as the three of them watch the fireworks light up the starlit sky together.

Their own cozy little family that grows stronger and closer every day.