#i think im probably gonna draw myself with the usual its my brand

[aka-indulgence]

OOOO WHAT'S THE NEW HAIR LOOK LIKE!! 👀😍

Something like this!

brb going to look for some monsters to smoch

[lettersofsky]

An Agreement

Ok, so I have two characters that I’ve been fleshing out and developing on their own and decided to try writing them together as they’re supposed to be for once! So I wrote something to try playing around with the two of them and another of my characters in a fun little thing to actually get myself back into writing. Especially to make myself try to describe characters more as I write them which I’m pretty awful at XD

Mihal, Duelek and Orrin are all mine This is a kind of mythical creature/monster au of sorts! Mihal and Duelek are both kinda finned snake people things. Enjoy!

Ko-Fi

~

“Ya shouldn’ta bothered with ‘im.”

“He needed help though.”

“Ain’t no problem a ours none.”

“I be known but still… ain’t wanted ta leave him out there like that.”

“Woulda been his own fault.”

Orrin groaned, alerting the two arguing voices to the fact that he was returning to consciousness from the empty darkness of rest accompanied by a vicious pounding in his skull. He lifted his hand to his glass-covered clenched shut eyes, trying to further shade and protect them from the weak spring sun above him trying to pierce into his skull aided by the lenses that usually assisted him in the task of perceiving the world around him, only to find his path blocked by a different pair of hands, cold and wet and… off in a way he couldn’t quite make sense of.

“Ya real shouldn’t be touchin ‘im.”

“Hush yaself,” the snap was soft, distracted and from somewhere directly over Orrin’s face, contrasting the rougher voice that sounded a bit further away. Then there’s an odd cooing accompanied by the feeling of thumbs rubbing the skin of his cheeks, nails of some kind as well. “He’s needin help, we should be givin it.”

“I tried.”

“I said hush,” a sharp edge entered the voice above his head and Orrin flinched ever so slightly, drawing attention back to himself and a shadow over his face. “Ya alright?”

“I… do not believe so,” he groaned again, blue eyes squinting open so he could see exactly who was above him. “My head feels—” He cut himself off as the individual shading him from the shadow over his face came into focus.

A human face, skin dark in colour than Orrin himself was, if not for the purple scales lining it, settled around eyes that were dark and empty similar to that of a snake and fanning across sharp cheeks and their forehead leading into long, dark brown water-soaked curls. There were a set of fins to either side of the face above him, fluttering and fanning out in rapidly increasing motions.

This certainly wasn’t a human.

The creature drew it’s hands back towards itself at Orrin’s silence and inspection, curved fangs biting into it’s bottom lip as Orrin looked to them itself of the face over his. While humanoid at a glance it was obviously that instead of fingers it had claws, each one ended in a chipped nail far longer than any Orrin had ever seen before and covered completely in scales in every shade of purple from the elbow to the joint of it’s fingers.

“Told ya ya was better off leavin ‘im be.” The voice comes from somewhere behind the individual over Orrin and it turns back to hiss at the other voice, a short, low sound reminiscent of an annoyed or irritated snake.

“Shut up!” The fins on the side of it’s head flared out in a striking contrast of colour against the darkness of it’s hair. “S’just a little scared, s’all.”

“Scared and gonna tell people ‘bout this shit.” The other shot back, sounding much calmer than there was any right to be whilst implying that it was better to dispose of Orrin than not.

“If I could interject,” Orrin spoke around a pained noise as he forced himself to sit up, finally getting a better look at the first individual as well as his first on the other in the scenario, carefully pushing himself back from their proximity ever so slightly. The other was very similar to the first, if a bit sharper in it’s face and the sharp line of it’s shoulders, or what Orrin could see of them from where it was reclining on the shore of the nearby lake, arms folded and chin resting upon them. It’s hair was shorter than the first’s as well and closer to a black than the deep brown of the other. Both of them had long tails where their waist and legs should have been, bright scales glittering and shifting in colour tone before his eyes as they twitched and shifted gently, tipped with a pair of fins similar to those at the side of their heads.

Wholly inhuman and nothing Orrin should have ever involved himself with. Though how he had come to do so was a mystery to him.

“I will not—”

“Nah.”

“Excuse me?”

It was the other one that had spoken and cut him off, chin rested on scaled claws, nails scoring into the wet soil at the edge of the lake. It’s eyes were half-lidded, hair fallen into it’s face and remaining stuck there in clumps of water-soaked strands. It rolled empty eyes at him, lips pulling back just enough to show off rows of needle-sharp teeth.

“Ain’t caring ‘bout whatever ya have ta ‘interject’ with,” it said, tail moving lazily in the water, a blur of formless purple. It’s lips pulled back further, baring more of it’s teeth and the stark white of it’s gums. “So shut yaself ‘fore I drag ya back under.”

“… that is incredibly rude of you.”

It’s all Orrin can really think in that moment and it’s far from what he wanted to say to the thing that was threatening him. It seemed that the two of them weren’t expecting to hear anything like that either if they way they both turned to stare at him in question was to go by, fins fluttering and head tilted similarly to a dog’s.

“Tryin ta be amusin ain’t helpin ya much.”

“We can’t just be makin threats afta savin ‘im!”

“I can,” the farther one dropped further back from the inquisitive lift it’d taken up at Orrin’s words, placing it’s chin back onto it’s folded arms, peering at Orrin from the corner of it’s eye, face turned towards the other. “I didn’t save ‘im.”

“Ya can’t—!”

“What if I swear myself to silence?” Orrin questioned, cutting off the softer of the two off as he felt that things were taking a turn for the dangerous. “Swear to not saying anything about either of you to anyone? Would that be enough?”

“Shake on it.”

“He doesn’t need ta—”

“He does.” The words rung with finality and Orrin felt his heart freeze in his chest, unsure of wht exactly what the rougher of the two was suggesting entailed but not sure he liked it either way. “If he don’t then Imma drag ‘im back down. No matta what ya want.”

“But…”

“I will do it. I will shake on it.”

The two creatures turn back to him, the sharper looking pleased with his decision while the other’s face fell. His decision made Orrin chose to focus on the sharper of the two, meeting half-lidded eyes as levelly as he was able.

“Good. Go on bro, he’s wantin ta make the deal.”

The softer of the two looks between Orrin and the other, fins fluttering before they pressed close to its skull and it turned back to Orrin, face turned towards its own hands.

“Ok.” It breathed, tail stretching out as it shifted closer to Orrin, offering it’s claw towards him. “Promise not ta be speakin’ ‘bout us ta no other and shake.”

Orrin hesitated a moment, just a moment as he looked at the outstretched hand, offering his own when he heard the noticeable sound of water moving and taking it, the tone of his own skin a lighter contrast to the creature’s own.

There’s a sting, a bite where the tips of its nails sink shallow indents into Orrin’s skin, his eyes move away from the one watching the proceeding to see something like ink curl from the indents into a band at his wrist, cleanly encircling the flesh in a brand that would lead to nothing but question.

“Is that all?” That didn’t really seem to have much of any kind of purpose really, aside from the ink on his wrist that the creature holding his hand had raised his captive arm towards its face to inspect.

“S’alright,” there was an air of contentedness about the onlooker’s voice as Orrin’s hand was releasing, the creature stretching it’s torso out on the edge of the lake in a lazy sprawl. “Ain’t gone be able ta get ta chatterin with that, free ta do what ya want now.”

Orrin blinked, opened his mouth to say something only to stop as the one closest to him spoke up. “So he can stay, yeah?”

“What?” “Excuse me?”

It wilts a bit at both of their attention focused onto it, shoulders hunching up closer to the fins pressed tight to the side of it’s skull once more, voice losing volume and becoming shaky as it continued. “Iffin… Iffin he wants a course… ya said he could do whatever he wants now that he’s…” it trails off into mumbling that Orrin can’t catch and catch be sure that the onlooker didn’t.

“… suppose yeah.” Orrin’s attention snapped back to the onlooking creature who seemed uninterested in the situation once more, inspecting the nails of it’s own claws with a languid pace. “Iffin he be wantin’ ta.”

Remaining here for any length of extended time did not really sound too appealing to him, but saying so outright might be rude and he didn’t know how either would take such an abrupt and clear dismissal of his continued presence on their lakefront.

Even more so when the softer of the two turned back to him, a gleam in it’s eye and small, hopeful smile on it’s face. “Mayhaps… ya could stay a bit? S’not… S;probably s’not real good ta move too soon, yeah? Ya should stay here a bit and rest, yeah?”

“I think I should leave.”

It’s smile drops and its fins droop, arms crossing over it’s torso as blank eyes turned away from Orrin to focus on some point at the ground.

“Oh.”

“Lookit you bein all heartbreakin afta he saved ya ass, rude.”

“I am completely soaked,” Orrin continued, ignoring the cold near snarl from the water. “I more than likely have an untreated concussion and I need to go be looked over and change before I freeze to death.”

The closest of the two perks up at his words, brows furrowing and mouth twisting as it splayed it’s claws out towards him, missing Orrin’s flinch even if the further of the two creature’s didn’t, motioning him off with small, quick motions. “Ya right! Ya warm blooded ones get cold and sick from the water, ya should go, it’s bein for the best.”

“Ya just—”

“It’s for the best.” It repeats, tail stretching out more from the curl of it Orrin had yet to notice as it pressed closer towards him, putting it’s face only a scant few inches from Orrin’s own as if to inspect him better. “Ain’t wantin ta waste hard work by ya gettin sick on us, yeah? Then ya really wouldn’t come back.” It chuckles the last little add-on but it rings hollow and aching, accompanied by it’s fins fluttering and flaring away from the side of it’s head.

Orrin looked between it and the other, teeth biting into his bottom lip and considering what to do now. It would be simply enough to take the opportunity granted and leave, escape and never come back. It wasn’t as if these creatures could really come and track him down, at least he certainly hoped they wouldn’t, whatever they were.

He was free to go, free to stand up and leave the lakefront and never look back on or think about it again. It was so easy to do.

“I will… try to return when I am… able to stay longer.” Or perhaps he could put his foot into his mouth and give another promise to these creatures, as if the first hadn’t been enough to cement how awful an idea it was to do so into his head.

It brightens up the creature in front of him though and it grins at him, showing off the odd backwards curve of it’s teeth towards the back of it’s own throat.

“Then we’ll be waitin ta see ya again!” It pauses, brow furrowing at Orrin. “Ain’t real knowin’ what ta call ya.”

“Orrin,” he doesn’t mention anything about his last name and that seems to be more than enough for the creature to return to grinning at him.

“Orrin.” It repeats, the name sounding a little off on it’s vocals. “Ya can call us Mihal and Duelek, yeah? For next time.”

“I will… keep those in mind for when I return.”

[funkyfatbabe]

i really wanted to do this makeup questionnaire!! you could say i was tagged by @cacupid (but not really dshjka) so here i am 🥰🥰🥰

What foundation/concealer do you use? 

currently i dont use a concealer bc i havent found one i like and i feel like concealer generally looks a bit cakey on me since i like light coverage, but i use the Too Faced Born this Way Foundation in the shades snow and cloud (mixed together) although i’m thinking of looking into the new Fenty Pro Filt’r Hydrating Longwear Foundation since I know they have my shade (tried the matte formula) and I would rather support Fenty than Too Faced! Not gonna try it till ive used up all of my BTW though 🥰

What do you think of fake eyelashes?

i think they can look super pretty! but i also dont like using them myself bc i have deepset eyes and they generally cover all my eyeshadow ! i will use them if im doing a campy / editorial sort of look but im so bad at applying them its barely worth it sometimes fhadsjfak 

What makeup tools do you use in makeup application?

I use mainly a brush set i got from BH cosmetics which are great quality as well as some Ecotools brushes i got from Coles. i also use a cheap makeup sponge i got from kmart bc it does the job and its ridiculous to spend $30 on a sponge that is no different than cheaper sponges!! 

What makeup do you currently wear every day?

i don’t wear makeup everyday but when i do and its not like a ~special~ look i generally use no primer (besides moisturiser), the foundation I mentioned set with my Australis HD Translucent Loose Setting Powder which I’ve only just started using and i like it so far, really finely milled! for my brows i use my Rimmel Wonder’full Brow Gel in 003 Dark Brown since it darkens my brows perfectly bc if I do it too much I look like a neanderthal lmao (love that deep set eye prominent brow bone combo). For eye shadow I generally use my Anastasia Beverly Hills Norvina palette or my BH Cosmetics Love Signs palette followed by my Elf H2O Proof Eyeliner Pen (not the greatest eyeliner but since i only do wings and dont fully line my eye it works for me!) I then curl my lashes and apply the Benefit Roller Lash Mascara (the sample sizes last so long). If I’m doing blush it’ll be my Revlon Insta Blush Stick in Nude Kiss or Maybelline Fit Me blush in Rose! Finally i’ll generally use one of my NYX Soft Matte Lip Creams since I find them super comfy and set with Morphe Continuous Setting Mist!!

What do you think of makeup?

I enjoy makeup as a way to express myself creatively since i suck at traditional art lol but i also think it can be dangerous and that the current insta glam makeup that is trendy now is dangerous - no one can look that perfect!!! i also think it fosters self esteem issues with much of the marketing bc thats how they make money, by shaming people!! i also hate when im expected to wear makeup i think its a problem when it gets to that point where someone has literal anxiety about being bare faced, like it can really be traumatic ! also the trend of having tons of makeup i mean that shits expensive and you really dont need that much, it shouldnt be normalised AGH. i also hate how a lot of brands sexualise their products which theyre promoting to young girls !! its disgusting!!! dont call your mascara better than sex or your blush orgasm i get so heated over this, they shouldnt think to use makeup to make them ~sexy~ theyre young girls this makeup makes them look like theyre in their 20s they shouldnt be worrying about their appearance in this way theyre kids AGH

  What cosmetic products have you always wanted to try but still haven’t?

I really wanna try some colourpop products, nothing in particular but i hear their quality is great for the price and if that doesnt draw me in idk what does!

How often do you shop for makeup?

not very often, i usually buy makeup if i need to replace a staple in my routine, or if i see a palette i really like and am in the financial position to buy it / can’t dupe it with my current collection

Who are your favorite bloggers/vloggers?

i LOVE Smokey Glow and Nisipisa, they’re great if youre looking into makeup with a critical anti-consumerism eye

Do you like multifunctional products like lip and cheek stains?

yes! i use my cream blushes for lip stains sometimes and they look very nice 

Do you subscribe to any beauty boxes?

nope! idk if there are any in australia and id rather just buy stuff i want than buy random things that i might not even like

Favourite recent beauty buy?

probably my Sugarpill Fun Size palette! the colours are so unique, but i was rly disappointed in the shade Twitch it under-performed compared to the rest :(

All-time favourite beauty item?

probably my BTW Foundation bc it was the only foundation I’ve ever used that doesn’t sink into my pores and cling to my dry patches

Any beauty brands you won’t support?

Jeffree Star Cosmetics, Kat Von D, Kylie Cosmetics, KKW Beauty, most influencer brands, Huda Beauty, Limecrime, Morphe (when I finish my setting mist I won’t be buying again)

I tag anyone who wants to do this! i dont really know anyone on here so just go for it  💖 sorry that this doesnt make heaps of sense i struggled putting my thoughts into words haha

[mawbwehownets]

Yep. I'm a curious mofo and your one of my favorite blogs.

dam alright…. i cut out the three i already answered

peach: do you have any piercings or tattoos?

i have regular ol ear piercings! i really want a septum and maybe a lip ring someday but like. my pain tolerance is so low its gonna take a while to get there,

raspberry: favorite flower?

ive said this before, i dont really know a Whole Lot about flowers but my go-to is always forget-me-nots

mango: what is your trademark?

agejsh you tell me idk!!!! i guess if this is meant to be. like. physically. i have a baseball cap i wear a lot that says “love always wins” on the side + its got a lesbian pin and a “… you know ;)” mcelroy pin

passion fruit: how would you describe your style?

im…. unsatisfied w it fjehfj

i have a lot of self esteem issues still and also. as a fat person its hard to find anything that fits you right so i dont really have my. desired style yet

preferably i wanna get to some sorta space punk aesthetic? but rn im just in ‘whatever fits and is comfortable’

pineapple: sexual orientation?

lesbian baybey

strawberry: favorite desserts?

ough fuck… its so unhealthy but i love meringue cake fjehf its the perfect combo of cronch and soft

grape: if you could take a vacation anywhere in the world, where would you go?

WEST VIRGINIA…… MOUNTAIN MAMA……… COUNTRY ROADS………….. TAKE ME TO MY BEST FRIENDS HOME…………………

i also would like to go to nyc and see be more chill in the theatre but i know that aint EVER gonna happen fjebfh. id maybe like to go to alabama and see some mh locations!! but probably After virginia. id get my best friend to drive us both there. beat a man to death with a rock in a tunnel, yk, get the true experience

blackberry: is your life an action film, a comedy, a romantic comedy, or drama?

this is like. one of those really bad dramas where it inadvertently Becomes a comedy

pomegranate: when do you feel the most confident?

uhhhh. when i pretend like i am fhdhd fake it til you make it is Legit Advice yall

cantaloupe: what are your parents’ names?

redacted and redacted but my mom has. a Very white suburban mom name

guava: dark & dramatic makeup or natural makeup?

i hate like. complexion makeup so im gonna ignore all that and pretend like this is only abt eyeshadow and lipstick and in that case WHATEVER THE FUKC YOU WANT i think eye makeup is So Cool no matter which direction its in!!

tangelo: if you could be any mythical creature, which would you be?

idk i like satyrs a lot!! mayhabeth them

plum: favorite clothing brands?

does ANYONE in the world have a favorite clothing brand. legitimate question. i just scuttle into a store, grab whatever doesnt hurt my body and Leave

coconut: favorite perfume?

i dont wear perfume basically at all or rly know anyone who does agehdg

lychee: satin or lace?

ive never felt satin i dont think??? i couldnt tell you

blueberry: what do you want to dress up as for halloween?

i never get invited anywhere on halloween i dont fuckign know fhehr

but. if i Had to choose….

apple: what do you use more, tumblr or twitter?

kiwi: what’s something that fascinates you?

i think i have a total of. like. five posts on twitter

watermelon: do you have a job? if so, what is your job title?

i mean…. a lot!!!! the world is so exciting and brimming with life and mysteries like how can you Not be intrigued by all that

papaya: what song describes your aesthetic?

absolutely not im jus out here

cranberry: favorite time of the day; morning, afternoon, dusk, or night?

summertime by my chemical romance… also this danish song called ‘en varm nats kølige luft’ by panamah AND humility by gorillaz its sorta. its different vibes of the same feel

nectarine: would you consider yourself an emotional person?

i really like dusk/nighttime!

orange: do you have long eyelashes?

im literally only up right now because i couldnt stop thinking abt two fictional characters and getting sad and crying over them. Yeah

apricot: what do you do when you’re sad?

i mean. decently. they sometimes brush against my glasses fhebbfb

star fruit: favorite sea creature?

if im at a point where its healthy for me to vibe w the sadness i put on some mellow tunes to cultivate it and channel it and ride it out, but if im Not i usually draw and/or listen to really upbeat music, distract myself w some podcasts or yt videos, stuff like that

ough fuck… idk theyre all so baby. i like whale sharks a lot

if its served 2 me! i dont go out with the specific purpose of drinking but i have a glass of wine with my parents every now and then

dragonfruit: do you drink alcohol?

[ziptoad]

🌹🍫💓🍓🍦

🌹 what do you think are the most romantic flowers other than roses?

already answered but another good contender imo: calla lilies. something about the curvy shape i just really love

🍫 do you have a favorite chocolate or sweet?

reeses…pebut bubber. the holiday-specific pumpkins/trees/hearts/eggs are my fave cause theyre just a liiiittle bit bigger and v smooth

💓 what do people do that makes your heart skip a beat? what makes your heart melt?

the biggest is hearing/reading “hey i saw xyz and thought of you” or “remember when we did this,” stuff along those lines. knowing i still exist to them even when im not around physically, that theyre still thinking of me, makes me feel very loved

🍓 what are you doing for valentine’s day? do you have any self care plans?

im definitely sending out valentines day cards to my friends! i really like writing out messages for them. other than that i will probably. eat chocolate and do a face mask while i play runescape.

🍦 what are ten things you love about youself?

ok to keep this from getting too too long im gonna put the list here under a cut

my skin’s gotten a lot better over the past 6 months! i love that, and that ive done a pretty good job of taking care of it

on a similar note i like that im fairly makeup-savvy, both in researching products/brands and in actual application. im nowhere near professional but when i apply it on myself i look damn good ok

i love my body shape. its taken me a while to really truly accept that. but i am soft and curvy and excellent for cuddling with.

im very empathetic and i like to think that said empathy has helped me to listen to and soothe and even advise quite a few people i care about

i have worked (and still am) very hard at subverting my depressive way of thinking and becoming a less cynical person

im a competent writer both for academic/professional purposes and my own journaling and occasional fic writing

i love how far ive come in art skills since i first Really started drawing in middle school, and i also love how far i still have to improve further. like, ill draw something now that i think is good and then get kind of excited thinking how much better i can be in the future

i love that i am bisexual! similar to body image its another thing that took me a really long time to fully accept and understand and to love about myself but now i am finally here.

i love that i can recite the entirety of the ultimate showdown by lemon demon from memory

lastly, i also love my sense of humor (usually)

[chimcharstar]

ANSWER 1 THROUGH 65 HO

65 Questions You Aren't Used To

WPOOOOO LETS GO 

Y E E T

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?

nnnnooooooo. its called holding onto my last marble.

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?

1. sometimes i can freak myself out going to the bathroom at night but bro. i take walks at like 11pm or whenever the hell i please. and i LIKE IT.

3. The person you would never want to meet?

i would not care to meet dick face

4. What is your favorite word?

worm

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?

well darn i dont really knowwww!!!!!!! the big jungle one from minecraft. but i love weeping willows of course.

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?

i didnt think

7. What shirt are you wearing?

my pyjama shirt from new vegas. las vegas. oh my god. not that i went there. my friend did. ive been wearing it for 3 days now. because its fine.

8. What do you label yourself as?

androgynouOOUUSSSSSSS i heard it described the most accurately for me as “in between blue and pink, purple is a blend while not being either of them.” yes this SPECIFICALLY. i could never be feminine while female presenting, but now that im usually read as masculine i go around seeming gay as fuck. and even though this sounds like heresy considering how i instinctively want to throat punch people who feminize me, i have comfortably considered myself a woman lately ONLYYYYYYYY BY being as butch as a butch can possibly butch. maybe without the cars. i would NEVER go by she/her NEVER NEVER NEVER. like there literally are butch women who go on T and use he/him pronouns. that brings me euphoria too and i find people reallllyyyyyy get mind-bent at this point. i really also get irritated at the idea that identifying with both lessens one or the other... thats why i like the purple thing so much. like im 100% of the thing. i was watching on queer eye, once, there was this part where all these women met up and one of them who was really masculine was saying how “a woman can look like this too” and i was like “i am probably crying for an important reason right now” and sometimes i feel attraction to women that is nOT of the ManTM just... i can do what i want. 

but my point is it’s like im only happy if i have a blend. theres even a particular quality of it i can put my finger on, like a rugged, handsome feel... and then a flamboyant, passionate feel... mix em all up... 

9. Bright room or dark room?

BRIGHTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT 

GUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?

transition juice, or fucking around with cs paint with some gentle existential dread

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?

this one, because my life is not hell, and i know a few basics about adulting now

12. Who told you they loved you last?

the sister. i said it for damage control because she had blown a fuse the other day. i was being very fake on purpose because i’m not being vulnerable with someone who will blow up. when she says it all i feel is pain. like cold paralyzing needles in my soul. i cant say i love you to her and mean it, even if i want to. honestly i wish people would say this to me. the most i love yous i remember are from family members putting band aids on the wreckage of our relationships, so i can feel a little twang of guilt and longing for what could have been and should have been. and feel like i should be doing something more. and feeling awkward because you both know they fucked up and it’s the elephant in the room. and i can feel their confusion and sickness causing them pain, feeling that pain for them. 

13. Your worst enemy?

hmmm. anyone who made me feel like less than i am. anyone 

14. What is your current desktop picture?

cherry blossoms and a city at night that i stole off the internet

15. Do you like someone?

like like crushes right? i fucking wish. i am so god damn sick of myself. i dont feel fuck or shit for anyone. its a fucking wasteland. yes im on T so i want to fuck anything that moves. and yet? can i please have some feelings? please may i have some feelings? not aesthetic appreciation. not moral, personality appreciation. or even just a deep respect and compassion. these are all fine things of course. but cant someone just drive me crazy? cant i have that extra spice of life? cant i just have a little bit of happy crazy? i will know a perfectly lovely person and ill WANT to have feelings for them. but i FUCKEN DONT. I DONT!!!! SHIT!!!!! WHAT IS THE MEANIGN?!?!??!??!?!1 i have fucking YET to meet anyone im more obsessed with than some really gay ocs. come on universe!!!! bring it!!! poor oscar. poor fucking oscar. whatever wavelength im vibing on man you are not on it. i wish you were on it. i wish you were on it oscar. you are hot you are hot with your bike oscar. and the rose quartz i gave you. the rose quartz you wanted. but i feel no authentic electric connection to you. i feel like all i just see is how your brain works with a coolheaded certainty. all i do is analyze what you are wearing so i can be as hot as you. maybe id like to draw you. and girls from work. you are so beautiful and amazing. i see you in bikinis on instagram. and im like oh beauty standards. look at you go, adhering to them. my heart rate goes right along at the same old pace. dont tell me this is principles. does someone have to smell bad? like edward cullen?? CAN SOMEBODY PLEASE JUST SEDUCE ME?!!!?? ID LOVE SOME EXTRA WILL TO LIVE! THEN MY STORIES WILL BE BETTER!!!! see this is the whole problem

16. The last song you listened to?

what am i to you by finn the human or actually that asgore fight song that i do not know the context of and dont want to until i play the game for myself

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

i would save this button for a karen.

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

jk rowling. every time i see her face in a news article about why her bland new transphobia anvil book is pretty bland without addressing the raging transphobia in it and around it, i take a minute and contemplate shoving a pie in her face, and agonizing that i cannot do it from this distance.

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?

a... slave? is this a kink thing? im fucking laughing this is going to be so honest. probably a toxic person from my past i have unresolved sexual tension with, especially since i was in my abused kid shell and was a huge doormat so now im all vengeful with issues. since this is totally something i am open to considering right now i would like to browse this concept’s menu

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)

yknow what? yknow what? i am just going to say all of me. i am feeling very body positive right now. i often feel isolated as fuck because of trans stuff and male body standards, but thats Also What Makes Me Special :) i like me, i like my face, i think i am very cool and unique, and i can walk fast.

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?

GOD DAMN IT THIS FUCKING QUESTION AGAIN

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?

yes. but it’s a secret.

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?

deep sea creatures. idk. even if its small and not even ugly. i just lose my fucking mind. i jump out of my chair. i get the heebies and the jeebies.

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.

okay. chicken. cheese. something spicy so it wont be boring. a fuck ton of veggies so i can be healthy. and some olives, fuck olive haters.

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?

IM GOING TO GIVE IT TO MY LANDLORD <3

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?

mexico city to see what all my friends are talking about.

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?

............................................................................

w    h       y

okay. i would go around tasting a bunch of fucking. really fancy old wines. listen i dont really drink okay. but with a very fancy old wine i can go around with a like, glass and look really sophisticated and tell gay things to gay people. hello boys. so id find one that strategically i would like the most for the rest of my life and choose it. and if its expensive i can sell it.

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

i would stick a bell in the middle of it and all of us have to go there at six o’clock and throw bread at each other and fuck.

29. What is your favorite expletive?

cunt. i dont really use it ever, but boy it can pack a punch! 

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?

that means my trees because theyre living things? good. my phone. i need it to function. everything else i have on the clouds and i can just write on a napkin if i really need.

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

:( 

i wanna say nothing because the good and the bad made me who i am and all that. and they’re learning experiences and healthy stuff. but some of my sisters abuse that has destroyed my psyche, literally just ruined my life, it would make things easier if that hadnt happened.

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!

WHAT I WANNA KNOW MORE ABOUT THIS LIFE STOP TELL ME HOW I GET THERE

Okay i’m moving to... greece and i’m going to study ancient greek everything and live right on the edge of the sea where the water’s lapping the doorsteps. and im gonna learn greek by immersion

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?

i am not surprised whatsoever death is a cool entity.

probably someone who died really sadly and too soon in my life (no one close to me thank god) but just as a service to society

34. What was your last dream about?

wolves with bombs were chasing me around a giant university. it was all part of the game. i was trying to protect some people... soldiers were chasing me... i was hiding under the floor... hiding from authorities and war are VERY common dreams for me

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?

Writer? Yes. am i saying that to sound full of myself? no. i am fighting very hard to maintain some self-confidence. i have done some writing recently and i am proud as fuck of myself. i caught myself thinking, “now that was banging, i know that was banging.” and so i just admitted it to myself.

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?

nooooot reeeaaaalllyyyyyy. i went in an ambulance for my face swelling up! still dont know if i needed to. still think i was allergic to the person i was talking to at the time. seriously when i stopped talking to them the hives went away. they literally gave me hives sdjfnskjndsjknfkjsfnjskdnfdsjknfjknf

37. Have you ever built a snowman?

yes

38. What is the color of your socks?

they have inuyashas on them

39. What type of music do you like?

dark, longing, aching, angry, raw, disappointed, serious, low songs that get intense as fuck.

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

sunrises for the concept, sunsets for the looks

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?

you know what? i dont really like milkshakes. they dont feel good in my tummy even if it’s not my stomach having a fucking meltdown.

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)

the fuck is football

43. Do you have any scars?

yes, most of them are from dermatillomania, two big cool-looking ones on my hands from touching a cookie sheet without an oven mitt and pouring microwaved coffee all over my thumb because literally every inch of the counter had a foot of dishes on it and i didn’t simply heat up the water normally because everything was dirty

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?

i want to be a psychologist and an author

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

id like a dong please

46. Are you reliable?

yeeeeeesssssss...... but the adhd wins sometimes

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?

future self: even if you’re in a worse off place than where i am right now, don’t regret anything, don’t beat yourself up. sometimes it’s realistic to have hope. you don’t have to be hard on yourself all the time just because it’s familiar and natural to you. so stop thinking “if i see a note from my past self ill be filled with rueful self awareness”

48. Do you hold grudges?

yes. i feel like im saving my soul a little and taking some power back when i am able to say “that hurt, that was wrong, and you don’t get access to me anymore, i don’t have to forgive you” it’s admitting that my own pain is real so i can listen to and protect myself. i wish i was more of a forgiving person but i spent too much time trying to forgive unorganically for the sake of being moral that i just can’t, can’t can’t now. it hurts so existentially and i deserve better. time for me to be mean and hold grudges. a little mean is okay.

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?

a DOG  CAT????????

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?

“doesn’t having a human-shaped robot with smoke coming out of it in the corner of your shop scare you late at night?”

“yes, sometimes i see it and jump a little”

51. Are you a good liar?

yes, when i’m dedicated. getting my birth certificate back? oscar worthy

52. How long could you go without talking?

i live like this lmao

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?

once upon a time i had bangs. and a bob cut

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?

yes bitch

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?

yes bitch i can do a convincing british accent but i don’t want to broadcast that fact because being british is cringe and plus my name is gordon and im already trans and interested in cooking and my greatest fear is that people think i am trying to become him when i am deeply offended when people assume i make personal decisions for anyone other than myself. no one has ever actually voiced this theory to me but it haunts me late at night. i can honestly probably do any accent if i listen to it for a little bit. i find it very easy to imitate sounds and like individual speaking styles to the point of stealing them even when i dont want to. like actually this is something that just comes to me easily i think.

56. What do you like on your toast?

fuck toast. i make a grill cheese. cheese and garlic.

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?

i tried digitally painting a generic girl who ended up looking really simliar to someone i went to school with only i made the eyes way too small and i would show you except it’s too much work

58. What would be you dream car?

vw bug with giant monster wheels, black with flames, big booming stereo. eyelashes in a drag way. ill run pickup trucks off the road

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.

i sang in the shower back when i felt free to annoy everyone in the house. oH WAIT IT DOESNT ANNOY PEOPLE WHO ARE KIND TO ME

...........

they taught me i was annoying. ANYWAY. i am too shy to sing in the shower but id love to. i dont really do anything unusual except that i take really long in there but yknow im not actually doing what people think im doing when i take long. im literally just sitting there decomposing, head empty.

60. Do you believe in aliens?

yes, of course, i have been telling everyone theres water under mars since day one and now look. now look

61. Do you often read your horoscope?

yes. im a sagittarius and clearly it is needed because CLEARLY theres no other fucking sagittariuses

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?

G, because my name starts with that and i’m just great. really, i like... it has a chonk to it. like a reliable chonk to it

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?

YKNOW WHAT? im going with dragons because of the fantasy, fire breathing and so on but yknow for my wip i was going to have both dragons and dinosaurs at a reptile like shelter

64. What do you think about babies?

i think they should be loved and nurtured, but they are too much work for me to want for myself at this point of life, and you should definitely read some manuals before having one if you can because people can and do mess this the fuck up

65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.

you didn’t ask anything here so im just going to tell you something. i am going to tell you that i have always been so hell bent on writing even when i hate it because sometimes when things are going well i feel like i am just so in another world and i feel like im doing something im really really supposed to do. it is such a euphoria and it has an effect on my whole aura. i really wish i had never made myself stop but we can’t change the past so i shall just have to never stop again.

THANKS HOOOOO

[malibu-92]

I dare you to answer all of them but skip the ones you've already answered

LETS DO THISthe numbers didn’t copy & i’m not going thru & adding them again fight meAA means already answered i guess

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?

AA

is your room messy or clean?

messy always

what color are your eyes?

blue!!

do you like your name? why?

i love it!! i think it’s pretty & uncommon

what is your relationship status?

lol

describe your personality in 3 words or less

awkward but confident

what color hair do you have?

naturally brown but it’s dyed auburn red!

what kind of car do you drive? color?

none lol

where do you shop?

my mom buys me clothes from kohl’s & jcpenney if i had a job & therefore my own money to spend i’d buy all of my clothes from this vintage thrift store downtown that i love

how would you describe your style?

AA

favorite social media account

tumblr or pinterest

what size bed do you have?

twin

any siblings?

in theory

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

minnesota cuz it’s cold & there’s hippo campus

favorite snapchat filter?

i don’t have snapchat so idk

favorite makeup brand(s)

AA

how many times a week do you shower?

AA

favorite tv show?

the x files

shoe size?

9.5

how tall are you?

5’9”

sandals or sneakers?

sneakers

do you go to the gym?

AA

describe your dream date

concert

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

uhh i think a $20 & some change

what color socks are you wearing?

black & pink

how many pillows do you sleep with?

AA

do you have a job? what do you do?

i babysit occasionally but nah

how many friends do you have?

idk enough

whats the worst thing you have ever done?

exist tbh

whats your favorite candle scent?

hm probably rose but i also really like apple, pumpkin & vanilla scents

3 favorite boy names

idk but i rly like the name blaise

3 favorite girl names

there are so many to choose from…… i like names that start with k

favorite actor?

??? i don’t pay much attention to actors oof

favorite actress?

AA

who is your celebrity crush?

zach sutton

favorite movie?

AA

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?

i used to all the time but i barely have time anymore!! my 2 faves are lord of the flies & to kill a mockingbird

money or brains?

AA

do you have a nickname? what is it?

momo & pieps

how many times have you been to the hospital?

zero for myself but i’ve visited other people like maybe 7 or 8 times

top 10 favorite songs

AA

do you take any medications daily?

AA

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

AA

what is your biggest fear?

AA

how many kids do you want?

AA

whats your go to hair style?

AA

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)

AA

who is your role model?

AA

what was the last compliment you received?

AA

what was the last text you sent?

AA

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

i cant remember honestly maybe like 9 or smth? i just kinda made that up

what is your dream car?

like a vintage volkswagen anything

opinion on smoking?

lung cancer

do you go to college?

im 16

what is your dream job?

writer

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?

neither i wanna live downtown somewhere

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

yea

do you have freckles?

i don’t have a ton on my face but my arms are covered

do you smile for pictures?

yup

how many pictures do you have on your phone?

sooo many

have you ever peed in the woods?

nah

do you still watch cartoons?

when i babysit yea & i would definitely still watch the show gravity falls if it hadn’t ended

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

i’ve never tried wendys nuggs actually

Favorite dipping sauce?

bbq

what do you wear to bed?

one of my dad’s old t-shirts w shorts in the summer & fuzzy pants in the winter

have you ever won a spelling bee?

ish? i won a classroom spelling bee & i was supposed to go to like a local competition but i had a more important conflict

what are your hobbies?

reading & writing poetry, journaling, singing, dancing

can you draw?

kinda

do you play an instrument?

my own vocal chords

what was the last concert you saw?

i haven’t been to one in sooooo long omg. all the somewhat good bands have been at bars that i’m not allowed to go to & all my faves haven’t come to my city :/so it was the buzz beach ball music festival in kansas city in september, where i saw middle kids, marian hill, spoon, hippo campus & foster the people

tea or coffee?

coffee

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

starbucks

do you want to get married?

at this point in time, no. very much subject to change

what is your crush’s first and last initial?

um i’m still trying to decide if the extremely slight & vague feelings i may or may not have qualify as a crush or not but for the sake of this question we’ll say they do & go with: c. h.

are you going to change your last name when you get married?

depends on their last name lol

what color looks best on you?

blue or burgundy i think

do you miss anyone right now?

yes

do you sleep with your door open or closed?

open cuz we have bad circulation upstairs

do you believe in ghosts?

undecided

what is your biggest pet peeve?

people saying “awww” with that stupid ass fake sympathetic smile when i tell them smth im upset about

last person you called?

my mom

favorite ice cream flavor?

mint chip

regular oreos or golden oreos?

regular duh i’m not a barbarian

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?

rainbow

what shirt are you wearing?

im wearing a blue & purple striped turtleneck

what is your phone background?

rn its a pic i took of a box of colorful sequins cuz i thought it was christmasy im probably gonna change it soon

are you outgoing or shy?

depends on who i’m with & how much caffeine i’ve had but usually shy i guess

do you like it when people play with your hair?

NO IF YOU TOUCH MY HAIR & I WILL SLAUGHTER YOU & YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY

do you like your neighbors?

it’s about half & half. i have a good friend who lives across the street from me & i live by some nice old people but i also have some neighbors who are complete assholes.

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

at night yea

have you ever been high?

nah

have you ever been drunk?

nah

last thing you ate?

a rolo

favorite lyrics right now

“try to live up to the person you pretend to be” from mr. know-it-all by young the giant is a solid life motto

summer or winter?

winter

day or night?

night

dark, milk, or white chocolate?

milk

favorite month?

AA

what is your zodiac sign

sagittarius

who was the last person you cried in front of?

my parents i think

[sadrien]

prince of cats

chapter five: to smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss

on ao3 || on ffnet 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 

hey everyone, how was your week!

posting wise, we've passed the halfway point of what i currently have written (i have through ch9 written at the moment). i'll hopefully write most of the rest of the fic in august, just at the moment my productivity writing wise is down because i've been drawing a lot and listening to taz!

enjoy!

From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      just letting u kno that i hate my boyfriend

From: fashion goddess To: the Most Beautiful      Thats a lie and you know it      Whats he making you do

From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      >:(      hes making us go out to dinner with his moms

From: fashion goddess To: the Most Beautiful      Oh THIS dinner

From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      yup

From: fashion goddess To: the Most Beautiful      First of all I talked to Nino about it last time you brought it up and its just a normal dinner      His moms just want to spend time with you two From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      ur sure From: fashion goddess To: the Most Beautiful      Absolutely      Alya you love Ninos moms      Theyve basically adopted you

From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      ur right      im just tired      ninos really excited so i was worried im missing something or am gonna be surprised by something

From: fashion goddess To: the Most Beautiful      As far as I can tell its just a normal dinner      No surprises just Nino being Nino      And the answer is to take a nap when you get home from work      Did you not sleep much last night?

From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      nah i was working on a project      until like 3 cause i hate myself      nino had to drag me to bed

From: fashion goddess To: the Most Beautiful      Thank god for Nino

From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      yeah he haaated me last night      speaking of cute boys tho

From: fashion goddess To: the Most Beautiful      Alya oh my god

From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      im sorry uve been friends w adrien for how long now??      3 weeks??? more than a month?? literal years!?!!?!??!?!      u talk about him all the time when r we gonna meet him

From: fashion goddess To: the Most Beautiful      Eventually!!!!!      I promise I just dont want you scaring him away

From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      nino and i r great we dont scare ppl

From: fashion goddess To: the Most Beautiful      uh huh

From: the Most Beautiful To: fashion goddess      shut up      also get me his last name

✦ ✦ ✦

Marinette puts down her sketch book. “Let’s go to the store.”

Adrien looks up from his laptop in surprise. “What?”

She’s gotten used to weekends with Adrien. He doesn’t expect her to look nice or even all that presentable, and she doesn’t expect him to, they just sit on the couch or in the kitchen and do their own thing. Adrien usually works, because he literally never stops working, and Marinette designs. She forces him to watch her favorite shows with her, even if it means that she has to explain to him who every single character is and the entire plot. In return, he’s managed to get her to watch some of his favorite movies. He randomly shows up throughout the week if he needs something from her kitchen because he always seems to be short something. Marinette is genuinely considering giving him a key to her apartment. Even if it’s just so he can steal from her fridge and cabinets.

“The store.” She pulls her hair up into a messy bun and grabs her purse off the back of her chair.

Adrien stares at her like she’s grown another head.

“You don’t have to come if you don’t want, but if you need anything, you should.” She gestures toward the door.

“What do you need?” he asks, apparently having found his voice.

“Fabric,” she says, ticking things off on her fingers, “some thread, ribbon, watercolor paper, brush markers if they have any, and pizza.”

He laughs and runs his hands through his hair. “I do like pizza.”

Marinette picks up her keys. “So are you coming? Because if you aren’t I should probably kick you out.”

“What?” Adrien asks as he stands. “You don’t trust me?”

“You might steal my Jagged Stone poster,” she says with a shrug of her shoulder.

“Fair enough.” He pulls on his coat. “Show me the way.”

✦ ✦ ✦

Marinette opts to walk to most of the stores. She asks Adrien if he minds and he just shakes his head and pulls his phone out of his pocket, sending a few quick texts as they make their way down the stairs and out of the apartment building.

“Where are we going exactly?” Adrien asks, pulling the door open.

“Fabric store first,” Marinette says, stuffing her phone into her purse.

He raises an eyebrow. “Don’t you have fabric at work?”

“Yes, but you’re missing the point— turn here. I don’t have fabric at home. At work, I do stuff for the head designer and my boss. I have much more creative freedom when I’m at home.”

“Huh.” Adrien flips his phone over in his hand. “Interesting. I know nothing about fashion so…”

Marinette smiles. “I sort of figured.”

He shrugs. “I don’t know much about how any sort of normal jobs work. I’ve got it relatively easy.”

“Working from your apartment and living off of take out?” she asks innocently.

Adrien rolls his eyes. “Yes exactly.”

Marinette elbows him lightly. “You’re very lucky you have me to teach you how to bake.”

It’s a nice day, not too hot and not too cold, without too many people walking around the streets. She finds herself wishing that she had more free time to spend outside, that she still had a balcony like she did when she was growing up. She misses having time to herself, where she could garden and sit outside and sew. It’s too nice to be stuck inside all the time.

Adrien accuses her of taking the long way and she doesn’t defend herself.

She holds the door open for Adrien when they get to the store, letting the far too cold airconditioning billow out onto the sidewalk.

Adrien wanders around in a sort of daze as Marinette pulls out her sketchbook and meticulously looks for the exact shade of blue that she needs.

“You needed ribbon?” Adrien asks, suddenly popping out of nowhere.

Marinette squeaks and jumps back with a start, dropping her sketchbook in surprise.

“Sorry about that,” he says sheepishly before bending over to pick up her sketchbook. He hands it back to her, rubbing the back of his neck. “Didn’t mean to frighten you.”

She takes a few deep breaths before taking the sketchbook from him. “It’s fine, you just surprised me. Easy to do when I’m concentrating.”

“What are you looking for?” Adrien asks, leaning closer, tilting his head to look at the page she has her sketchbook flipped open to.

“A blue,” Marinette murmurs, pointing to a swatch of fabric she stole from work and taped onto the page. “I mean obviously I have a type of fabric in my mind, I’m just really desperate for this shade of blue because—” Well…she doesn’t actually have a reason. She’s just attached. And that’s silly.

Adrien hums to himself. “Okay,” he says after a moment. And then he vanishes into another aisle.  

Marinette stares at the space he was occupying for a long moment before shrugging and moving on. She decides she’ll find the blue later and starts looking for white lining. She pulls a bolt from the shelf, feeling the fabric between her fingers. It’s a little heavier than she would like, but if she can’t find anything else, she can make it work.

Adrien steps out from around the corner. “Would this work?” he asks, holding out a bolt of blue fabric.

Marinette blinks and takes it from him, running her fingers over the satin-like fabric. “This is…this is perfect, actually.”

He shrugs and puts his hands in his pockets. “I have a lot of experience with lots of types of fabrics.” He ignores the confused look Marinette gives him. She has questions, but mostly she’s just glad she doesn’t have to rethink the entire color scheme of this outfit.

Adrien watches over her shoulder as she chooses ribbon and nods as she rambles on about what she’s making. He doesn’t look like he understands what she’s saying to him, but he’s listening and that’s enough.

Marinette estimates how much fabric she needs and Adrien hums to himself as they get the fabric cut and check out.

“What did you think?” Marinette asks as he pushes the door open for her.

Adrien blinks in the bright sunlight and glances down the street before looking back to Marinette. “It was nice,” he says. “Overwhelming, but strangely calming.”

Marinette laughs. “That sounds about right.”

“Where to next?” Adrien asks with a tilt of his head.

✦ ✦ ✦

“Know anything about art?” Marinette asks as she pulls open the door to the art store.

“Hardly,” Adrien says with a crooked smile. “I don’t know anything about most creative things. I know music and that’s kind of where my creative talents end.”

“Music?” Marinette asks. He’s never mentioned anything about music before, though he hasn’t mentioned many hobbies or talents in general.

“Piano,” he specifies. “Took lessons for years, my parents insisted.”

Marinette leads him toward the markers and paints. “So you must be pretty good, huh?”

“Eh.” He shrugs. “Nowhere as good as my father would like me to be, but I’m passable.”

She rolls her eyes. “So that means you’re fantastic.”

“It really doesn’t,” Adrien says with a laugh. “But thanks for your faith in me.”

Marinette studies the brush markers, trying to decide what brand to get and how much money she’s willing to shell out today. Adrien amuses himself by uncapping some of the markers and trying out the testing markers while she Googles reviews on the internet. He’s flipping through an anatomy book when she decides on a set of markers and moves on to paper. She’s running low.

Marinette wanders further down the aisle where the sketchbooks and papers are. She feels someone’s eyes on her, but when she looks up, she sees a worker at the entrance. Marinette picks up a pack of watercolor paper and hums to herself. She still isn’t sure if she likes this paper, but she has very few options she can afford.

Adrien holds up a copic marker. “Why is this seven euros?”

She blinks at him. “Because it is?”

He squints at it. “It’s just a marker?”

“It’s a copic marker,” she says, like that will explain everything. Judging by the expression on his face, it doesn’t help at all. Marinette takes the marker from him and puts it back with the others. “It’s alcohol based and fancy, that’s why it’s expensive.”

Adrien looks at the case of copics in wonder. “Why would you spend so much on a marker?”

“I don’t know,” Marinette says. Adrien raises his eyebrows and she just shrugs. “I don’t usually use them. I don’t need nice markers and I don’t exactly have a lot of money to be spending on things I don’t need.”

“Fair enough,” he murmurs. He narrows his eyes at the copic. “That better be one magical marker if I’m paying seven euros for it.”

Marinette snorts. “Lucky for you, you’re not.”

Adrien gives her a lopsided smile. “Yeah, that’s true. I’m no Picasso. I think the best I can do is a stick figure.”

She elbows him lightly. “I’m sure you draw beautiful stick figures.”

Adrien laughs and for that moment, Marinette’s world gets a little brighter and her heart starts to sing.

✦ ✦ ✦

“Have you ever had pizza here?” Marinette asks as her and Adrien wait in line to order.

“Mostly I just get whatever will deliver,” he admits.

“You don’t leave the apartment much, do you?” she teases.

Adrien rubs the back of his neck. “I don’t usually need to.”

“Do you know what you want or do you just want the same as me?”

“Let’s go with the latter.”

Marinette orders her usual and pays before Adrien can offer, rejecting it when it does come. “My treat,” she says with a smile.

They sit in a booth by the window with their pizza and bags.

“Careful, it’s hot—” Marinette warns, just as Adrien burns his tongue.

“Ahhhh—” He sticks his tongue out and makes a pained expression.

She hides her smile behind her slice, but Adrien catches it and glares at her. She just shrugs. “I tried to warn you.” As she picks up her slice, someone catches her eye.

They’re watching her and Adrien out of the corner of their eye. They make eye contact with her and quickly go back to whatever they were doing on their phone. Adrien hisses in pain, bringing Marinette’s attention back to their table. “That was a mistake.”

Marinette opens her mouth to reply. The strange feeling of someone’s eyes on her passes through her and makes her freeze up and she looks back to the person who was watching them. They’re packing up their things and heading out the door.

“What is it?” Adrien asks.

Marinette shakes her head. “Sorry, I thought I saw someone I knew. I was wrong.”

He raises his eyebrows. “Been there, done that. I’ve walked up to people thinking I knew them before. I did not.” She winces. “It was incredibly embarrassing.”

“I can imagine,” she says, taking a careful bite of her pizza.

Adrien eyes her. “Am I going to burn my face off this time?”

Marinette snorts and lowers her slice. “I think you’re okay now.”

“If I die, my blood is on your hands,” he says seriously.

She rolls her eyes. “Pizza isn’t going to kill you, I promise.”  

✦ ✦ ✦

Adrien trails behind Marinette on the stairs, writing a quick email and carrying one of her bags.

“Come in for a minute?” Marinette asks as she pulls out her keys.

“Hm?” Adrien asks. He glances up from his phone. “Oh! Oh yeah, sure. I left my laptop on your table, anyway.”

She shakes her head as she unlocks her apartment. “You have to have more of your stuff at my apartment than your own.”

“It’s called minimalism,” Adrien says seriously.

Marinette frowns as the door swings open. She glances over her shoulder to Adrien. “I didn’t leave the TV on, did I?”

Adrien shakes his head. “We didn’t have it—”

“Hey!” Alya shouts from the couch.

“—on…” He trails off and hangs back by the door.

Marinette rolls her eyes. “Don’t worry, it’s one of my friends. Trust me, I regret letting her have a key to this place,” she stage whispers. She shuts the door once Adrien has stepped inside after a bit of hesitation. She leaves her bags on the table before joining Alya, and apparently Nino, in front of the TV.

Nino pauses whatever show they’re watching and returns to the Netflix home screen.

Marinette crosses her arms and leans over the back of the couch. “Why are you in my house?”

“Apartment,” Nino corrects lightly.

Adrien snorts from where he’s standing awkwardly in the kitchen. He puts Marinette’s bags down on the counter and closes his laptop before holding it to his chest.

“I’ve got a present,” Alya sings, holding up a box.

Marinette rolls her eyes. “Is this payment for breaking and entering?”

“It’s not breaking if you have the key,” Nino points out. He continues to flip through Netflix. “Can’t argue the entering though.”

Alya smiles brightly at Adrien, but Marinette doesn’t miss the way Alya’s eyes sweep over him, taking in as many details as she can. “Hey, stranger!”

Adrien lifts a hand awkwardly, still hanging back by the door.

Nino leans back and nods at Adrien. “Yo, join the party.”

“I should—” Adrien gestures to the door.

Alya jumps up from the couch and hops of the back. She grabs Marinette’s arm as she breezes by, dragging her over to Adrien.

“Alya,” Marinette hisses, attempting to dig her heels into the ground as Alya pulls her along.

“I’m Alya!” she announces, holding out her hand to Adrien. “Marinette’s best friend.”

Adrien hesitates for a long moment before he shakes Alya’s hand. “Adrien. Marinette’s…” his gaze slides to Marinette before snapping back to Alya. “Her neighbor.”

Marinette tries to keep her blush from burning too brightly.

Alya shakes his hand eagerly. “Great to meet you!”

“Nino!” he shouts from the couch. “But I was working all day and I’m tired so sorry, dude, I’m staying put.”  

“It’s fine,” Adrien promises. “I really should be getting back. Plagg needs to be fed.”

Marinette nods and pulls away from Alya. “Yeah, of course! Let me just— I’ll show you out.” Alya puts the box into Marinette’s hands winks. Marinette gives her a little shove toward the couch as Adrien pulls open the door.

“You didn’t have to show me out,” Adrien insists as Marinette quickly closes the door once they’re in the hallway. She leans against it so Alya can’t look out the peephole. “I’m sure I won’t get lost on the way home.” He gives her a small smile.

“I wanted the chance to apologize for…them.” Marinette waves at the door behind her. “Mostly Alya, but both of them. They can be a lot.”

“They seem nice,” Adrien says, and Marinette still can’t read him well enough to know if he’s being sincere or not. “What did they get you?” He gestures to the box Marinette is awkwardly holding.

“Pastries. They’re from my parents’ bakery,” Marinette says quickly. “Tom and Sabine’s— they’re my parents. That’s me, Marinette Dupain-Cheng, daughter of Tom and Sabine.” She swallows and glances down at her feet. That was a little too much rambling.

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng,” Adrien repeats softly. “You have a beautiful name.” He’s smiling when Marinette looks up at him.

She bites her lip. “Th-thank you. What about you, what’s your last name?”

“Kersey,” Adrien says, the corner of his mouth lifting in a small smirk. “Adrien Kersey.”

“A nice name,” Marinette says, running it over in her mind. Alya will kill her if she forgets it, but Marinette is fairly certain it’s burned into her brain forever.

“Thanks, my parents chose it,” Adrien jokes. “I’m just stuck with it.” He pushes open his door. “You’ll have to take me to your parents’ bakery sometime. I bet it’s great.”

“Sounds good,” Marinette murmurs as Adrien lifts a hand and disappears into his apartment. When the door clicks shut behind him, she sags against her own door and lets out a sigh.

She really doesn’t know how to handle this boy.

Alya and Nino are staring at her when she reenters the apartment. Marinette feels her face burn as she closes and locks the door.

“Not a word,” she says, putting the box from the bakery down on the kitchen counter.

Nino mimes zipping his lips shut.

“No words?” Alya asks. “Are you sure? Because I have so many words.”

“Yeah, he’s hot,” Nino says.

Marinette glares at him. “Thanks for not saying anything.”

“Alright, now that we are saying things,” Alya says, twisting around on the couch, “where were you? You don’t leave the house without us.”

“I leave the house!” Marinette protests.

Nino raises his eyebrows. “To have fun?”

Marinette turns away to put her keys back.

“Oooo,” Alya drawls. “Silent treatment.”

“It wasn’t fun, anyway,” Marinette says. “I had errands to run.”

“That you decided to run with a cute boy,” Alya points out.

“That sounds like fun to me,” Nino muses.

Marinette glances over her shoulder at him. “Aren’t you supposed to be on my side here?”

Alya gives her an offended look. “I’m his girlfriend.”

“I’ve known him longer.”

“Touché, Dupain-Cheng,” she says, narrowing her eyes.

Marinette sighs. “Speaking of last names…”

“You got it!” Alya shouts, jumping up from the couch. Nino tries to shush her, and she grabs a pillow and covers his face with it. “Tell me tell me tell me— I want to Facebook stalk him.”

Nino pulls the pillow away. “Who uses Facebook anymore?”

Alya turns to Marinette with wide eyes. “Is he secretly a wine mom?”

Marinette stares at her for a long moment. “Why are we friends.”

Alya throws the pillow across the room.

Marinette bats it away and says, “If you want Adrien’s last name, maybe you shouldn’t be throwing things at me.”

“She has a point, babe,” Nino agrees.

Alya sticks her tongue out at him before patting the cushion next to her eagerly. “Come on, Mar! I’ve waited a literal month for this.”

“Hm…” Marinette taps a finger against her lips. “Maybe I should keep you waiting.”

“Marinette!”

“Fine!” She drops down between Alya and the arm of the couch. “His last name is Kersey.”

Alya yanks her phone out of her pocket and starts typing rapidly.

Nino leans forward to look Marinette in the eye. “How long do you think she’s going to be at this?”

“A long time,” Marinette admits.

“Wanna see what Disney movies are on Netflix?” he asks, picking the remote back up. “We put some takeout in your fridge for later tonight.”

“Sounds good to me,” Marinette says. “I need to do a lot of nothing before work tomorrow.”

Nino types in Disney and starts scrolling through the results. “Are Zoé and Dorian still arguing about that thing?”

“If you’re talking about that jacket thing from a few weeks ago, they’re over that. If you’re talking about fake leather, they spent like an hour ‘debating’ that on Friday.”

“Fake leather,” Nino says in wonder. “Why were they debating that? I thought this collection was all like…dresses and stuff. Flowy soft things. What does fake leather have to do with that?”

“Nothing.”

Nino stops clicking through movies for a second. “I don’t understand you people.”

Marinette sighs and sinks against the back of the couch, pulling a pillow to her chest. “Neither do I,” she murmurs.

[rockformed]

1-100 for that ask thing. Cuz fuck you

JESUS CHRIST WILLim putting this under a read more fuck you too

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? 

soundcloud!! 

is your room messy or clean?

always messy, last time it was clean was when we first moved in lmao

what color are your eyes?

very dark brown

do you like your name? why?

i do!! cause it means “helper”!! and i love to help vv

what is your relationship status?

single as fuck, ive never been in a relationship ;;

describe your personality in 3 words or less

shy, creative, and passive

what color hair do you have?

natural redhead babeyyyy

what kind of car do you drive? color?

i dont drive ;;

where do you shop?

usually i get my clothes from a place called torrid, they sell plus sized stuff!! but i get all my t-shirts from redbubble and thinkgeek! 

how would you describe your style?

all over the place lmao, messy

favorite social media account

tumblr is m fav just cause the site works the way i think it should, in chronological order 

what size bed do you have?

double

any siblings?

yep!! 2 step brothers, 1 half brother and 1 half sister 

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

a small cabin on a riverside with self-sustainability. i just dont wanna have to worry about stuff and be left to myself in a cute little cabin!!

favorite snapchat filter?

THE TIGER FACEMASK ONE

favorite makeup brand(s)

dont wear makeup :p

how many times a week do you shower?

i uhhhhh try to shower once every day but i have a hard time remembering a lot ;;

favorite tv show?

atm i dont have one, i dont really watch tv! im excited for the return of steven universe tho 

shoe size?

8 womens

how tall are you?

5′3″ last time i checked!!

sandals or sneakers?

SNEAKERS, i hate sandals :(

do you go to the gym?

used to every day, stopped cause we moved away from my gym and i have no way to get there :(

describe your dream date

oh gosh, i dont really know, something chill where i could get to know the person a bit, maybe lunch at a cute airy restaurant vv

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

i have misc change and a 15 dollar red lobster gift card lol

what color socks are you wearing?

im not wearing any!!

how many pillows do you sleep with?

3, and many stuffed animals :3

do you have a job? what do you do?

i do commissions, but i dont have a 9-5 “job” yet

how many friends do you have?

oh gosh, uuummmm 2 really good ones, maybe 7 others?? im probably forgetting ;;

whats the worst thing you have ever done?

when i was 5 i stole a harmonica from a cracker barrel and swore on the bible that the woman at the counter let me have it ;;;;; it haunts me everyday for real

whats your favorite candle scent?

i dont have a specific, but i love sweet scented candles, and holiday ones :p

3 favorite boy names

Ben, Oliver, and Andrew 

3 favorite girl names

Lily, Genevieve, and Lorelei

favorite actor?

Robin Williams %100 forever

favorite actress?

amy adams

who is your celebrity crush?

Chris Pratt i guess??? i dont pay too much attention to that stuff :p

favorite movie?

ever, is wreck it ralph, atm is beauty and the beast (not the remake)

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?

i dont read too much anymore, but my favorite book(s) is the Doll People by Ann M. Martin.

money or brains?

brains if by brains you include personality

do you have a nickname? what is it?

a lot of people on here call me Rock, but i dont have a real life nickname!!

how many times have you been to the hospital?

one, when i was born lmao 

top 10 favorite songs

GOD fuck umm, Overwhelming by Jon Bellion, Fiddle and the Drum by Perfect Circle, 24 Karat Magic by Bruno Mars, Ticker Tape by Gorillaz, Separate Ways by Journey, I Believe in a Thing Called Love by The Darkness, Beautiful Girls by Sean Kingston (i know, i know), Kill Your Heroes by AWOLNATION, Clocks by Coldplay, and Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap.

do you take any medications daily?

nope!!

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

soft vv cause i drink so much fuckin water lmao

what is your biggest fear?

uhhh my loved ones dying and not knowing if i’d be okay if they did??

how many kids do you want?

NONE 

whats your go to hair style?

natural i guess, i dont really do up my hair :0

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)

ideally, id love one of those micro-houses and to travel the country with my house, but if that doesnt work out id like a shotgun style! 

who is your role model?

Robin Williams, again :p

what was the last compliment you received?

“i love the way you color” was the last one!!

what was the last text you sent?

“my feet are gonna fall the fuck off” sent to my mom sjhdfjhdjfs

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

i didnt grow up believing in santa, my mom always just wrote her name on my presents! 

what is your dream car?

a tucker, even tho thats very VERY unlikely lmao 

opinion on smoking?

dont do it 

do you go to college?

no, but i want to!! 

what is your dream job?

character/concept designer for a film or game studio

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?

rural!!

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

no >:(

do you have freckles?

lots on my arms, none on my face anymore :p

do you smile for pictures?

yep!! i have a bad sameface problem lmao

how many pictures do you have on your phone?

100+, my phone doesnt tell me an exact number

have you ever peed in the woods?

yep, once when i was younger i got locked out of my house on the way home from school so i had to pee in the woods behind our house and wait for my mom to get home 

do you still watch cartoons?

yeah, its the only thing i really watch lol

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

Wendys, but Mcdonalds has better fries

Favorite dipping sauce?

sweet BBQ

what do you wear to bed?

sweatpants and a t-shirt!

have you ever won a spelling bee?

no, but i one a book fair contest once!

what are your hobbies?

drawing, singing, music in general, video games, and seeing how long i can stay up without passing out lmao

can you draw?

i like to think so

do you play an instrument?

flute, but i think ive forgotten how by now

what was the last concert you saw?

i havent seen any, but im going to see one next week!!

tea or coffee?

neither, unless we’re talking sweet tea lmao

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

AMERICA RUNS ON DUNKIN YOU FOOL

do you want to get married?

yes, id like to!! but if the person i end up with doesnt want to im cool with that!

what is your crush’s first and last initial?

im not answering this fkdjgghjdhf

are you going to change your last name when you get married?

depends on the other persons last name and if they wanna change theirs!!

what color looks best on you?

green!

do you miss anyone right now?

yeah, a friend of mine and my dad :(

do you sleep with your door open or closed?

closed and locked lol

do you believe in ghosts?

somewhat

what is your biggest pet peeve? 

when people are rude or self-absorbed ://

last person you called`

my mom

favorite ice cream flavor?

cookie dough!!

regular oreos or golden oreos?

regular (put them in the fridge first, they’re better cold!!)

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?

i hate sprinkles :p tastes like paste 

what shirt are you wearing?

a fallout t-shirt!

what is your phone background?

cinderella’s castle, a pick that i took last time i went to magic kingdom!!

are you outgoing or shy?

shy :3c

do you like it when people play with your hair?

yeah!! but only if i know them fkhgdfg

do you like your neighbors?

some of them, our neighbor to our right is really nice but past that we have two trump supporters and on the left we have a couple thats really really mean lmao

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

in the morning!!

have you ever been high?

nope 

have you ever been drunk?

nope 

last thing you ate?

 a subway sandwich!!

favorite lyrics right now

???

summer or winter?

WINTER PLS

day or night?

Day, specifially mornings :o

dark, milk, or white chocolate?

milk!!

favorite month?

december :)

what is your zodiac sign

cancer!!!

who was the last person you cried in front of?

uhhhh my therapist lmao

FUCK YOU WILL THIS TOOK ME AN HOUR

[dawnowar]

I don’t wear a lot of makeup. Cause I’m 50. Well 49 and a half. or so. I don’t look my age and that’s cool. I dye my hair cause it comes in grey but I dyed it since I was 16 so its not a big thing. 

I love makeup, dont get me wrong. I wear enough when I go out. Sometimes too much. It’s hard to get it just right cause when you get older it sinks into your fine lines and makes you look much older. 

I have a lot of friends who are significantly younger than me. Almost all of them really. Because I like to do things younger people do and I don’t like to do whatever it is I’m supposed to be doing with people my age. 

I don’t even know what that is. 

But I’m pretty sure I don’t like doing it. 

My girlie friends who are much younger than me spend time and money on makeup that I just don’t anymore, because my skin looks better than its ever looked. I had acne from the day i turned 16 to somewhere around 42 I think. I still get a pimple now and again but its pretty rare. Maybe because I wear a lot less makeup. 

I like to make some attempt at covering the dark circles under my eyes. And I like to wear eye shadow, mascara and lipstick. I’m not gonna give myself cartoon eyebrows no matter how trendy they get. 

I decided years ago that all the girls i know who draw on completely fake faces are pretty much showing me who they really are.. Girls who look fake usually are fake. I decided not to be one of them. 

I like makeup though. When I could wear a ton of it, I most certainly did. So it’s weird for me when the young girls I know talk about makeup and exclude me from the conversation thinking me a person who doesn’t care about such things. 

But makeup has gotten a lot more expensive than it used to be too, and girls it seems are taking youtube makeup tips from drag queens these days. It seems like you have to wear a lot more makeup, you have a lot more products and you have to buy really expensive brands to be in with the cool kids.

Every once in awhile I’ll buy one of these expensive products and I almost always don’t see enough of a difference between the cheaper brands to buy that again. 

I posted a selfie last night after I just put on my makeup. It always looks best in the first 10 minutes. I go out and eat and drink and sweat and its rare i come back home looking as pretty as I started.

I dont generally take makeup with me. I put it on and I go out and it fades away or it doesn’t. Sometimes I’ll take lipstick if i know im gonna be eating. Even my lipstick I need to wear lighter lip liners now because it settles in my fine lines and wrinkles I didnt even know were there.

I don’t mind looking more natural. I feel like it’s a visual sign to people that I’m more real than the other girls. I like to think that’s true. 

I dye my hair a lighter color than i did when i was younger too. its subtle but it makes a difference and keeps you younger looking. 

Most guys one or two years younger than me look and act about 10 years older than me and are in shock and disbelief when i correct them for talking to me like I’m too young to remember things they do. I’ll swear to them I’m older than they are. I can win drinks that way if I make bets before I show em my drivers licence. 

I really think a lot of it is because women my age who look good lie about their age. Because they can get away with it. So no one knows what women my age actually look like anyway. That’s why everyone thinks I’m in my late 30s/early 40′s.

When I *was* in my 30′s people guessed my age at 3 years older than they were. No matter what age they were. 

Last time I told a guy how old I was he was really confused. He’s known me for years. One of the first conversations we had was about how I was way older than he was thinking I was. I knew how old he was but he lied to me and made himself 10 years younger. Thinking I was about 10 years younger than him and I’d be more interested if he were of similar age. Which effectively made him too young for me. I told him what was what. Cause I’m like that. and he was all noooooooo can’t be.. and i guess he forgot about it cause it was all new to him all over again a few weeks ago. 

I don’t mind being old. Younger guys are into it so there’s no issue there but I do have this weird fear that I’m about to cross the 50 threshold and its all over for me after that. It’s probably not true but I do feel like there’s a limit to how old an older woman can get and still be considered sexy. 

I don’t know what I do after that. Once I get too old. I’m sure I’ll still be cute and fun and I’ll still do stuff but I think there’s a point when you get old when people think you’re “spunky”, but not “sexy” anymore.

So I’m kinda milking the sexy older woman stereotype while I still can cause I think im nearing the end of my shelf life with that. 

But truthfully the “sexy older woman” isn’t really me. I’m not that into cougaring anyone. The boys want me to. Cause they’ve got some fantasy about that, but it’s not who I am or what I do or what I’m looking for in a relationship. 

Because when it comes right down to it, That’s really just them wanting to use me for sex while imagining that *I’m* using *them* for sex. 

I’m in a good place right now. I have a good life and I like where I’ve landed. My cute little house, my two perfect kitty cats who at the moment aren’t causing me any issues, my job I actually like for clients i get along with and lots of cats and dogs to pass my work days with. I like my city and I’ve made some friends here I trust and care about. 

I don’t feel like I have any old issues or baggage outstanding. I’ve dealt with my shit and I’ve framed everything in a good way. I feel like I’ve said what I’ve needed to say to who I’ve needed to say it to. I’ve learned from my mistakes and I’m working on not repeating them. I’m not self-destructive and I try to be a good supportive friend for people. I’m not perfect but I try and I think I get it more right than wrong most of the time these days. 

So life is grand and I’m gonna be 50 in four more months.

I never knew what that would look like for me. 

I feel like a lot of the things I used to be sad about or worry about don’t matter so much anymore. Like I’ve learned to let things go better. Not just grudges. I never put a lot of faith in other people’s expectations of me so those things never weighed heavily on me, but I think I had some of my own that I haven’t been able to get right yet. I’ve only recently given myself permission to be happy anyway and I’ll either get there or I won’t. 

They say life begins at 40. When I turned 40 I kind of expected some magical change to occur. I even moved cities and tried to affect the change myself but i can’t say there ever really was one. 

but somewhere inbetween 40-50 I learned to be less hard on myself. I fixed one problem at a time until there were more things right in my life than wrong with my life. And then things were pretty good. 

as I approach the 50 mark, it seems like most things are pretty good. Best life I’ve lived ever. Thank goodness. It feels like a relief. To be able to sit in my living room and feel like everything is good. 

Not perfect but good. 

I wear less makeup and I dye my hair a lighter color. I’ve softened a lot of my edges metaphorically as well. It’s a better look all around when you’re older.

[bookwormcheerleader]

i was tagged by @trevorfindsthestrals (LOOK i finally got internet access on my laptop again!! Sorry it took so long) 1. Coffee or tea? tea, i had my first cup of coffee on like thursday last week 2. Black and white or color? black or soft, but not pastel, colours 3. Drawings or paintings? idk, whatever is more moving in that moment i guess 4. Dresses or skirts? dresses because i never know how to match with a skirt 5. Books or movies? how DARE you make me choose, i think books, but i wanna make movies (potentially havent really explored that yet) so it seems like the wrong answer 6. Pepsi or Coke? i dont drink fizzy drinks 7. Chinese or Italian? definitely italian on an everyday basis but i LOVE chinese too 8. Early bird or night owl? its almost midnight and i havent started my reading for tomorrow, that counts as an answer right? 9. Chocolate or vanilla? chocolate, unless its a milkshake 10. Introvert or extrovert? introvert, i don’t really like people 11. Hugs or kisses? ive never been kissed so hugs 12. Hunting or fishing? aesthetics of hunting but uh with fishing you can not put a hook on the line and just kinda sit there and chill without looking like the animal lover that your family judges you for being 13. Winter or summer? yes. idk im probably more of a summer person, but i also really like the implications of winter in that everything has to die in order to be reborn, plus i can’t really breathe in the heat, but i also have poor circulation in my extremities so the cold sucks ass 14. Spring or fall? spring, i like the crisp air of fall dont get me wrong, but the rebirth and the petrichor after a spring rain with a crisp breeze that doesnt chill you is just so relaxing 15. Rural or urban? i grew up in the woods so rural but i need to at least be kinda close to a hospital to avoid panicking  16. PC or Mac? pc 17. Tan or pale? is this preference, cuz i dont have one of those, but i am so white that i was the same color as my cheer uniform in high school 18. Cake or pie? cake, i dont like pie crust 19. Ice cream or yogurt? frozen yogurt tbh, it jsut tastes fresher and less heavy 20. Ketchup or mustard? my brother likes to mock me for how much i loved ketchup when i was like 7 as if it was yesterday 21. Sweet pickles or dill pickles? i dont like pickles 22. Comedy or mystery? can we do a hybrid where its like theyre fighting crime but have no ability to act serious, cuz im basically writing a comic book like that with @spectralflutterbeast 23. Boots or sandals? i live in a colder wetter climate so usually boots, but i love sandals 24. Silver or gold? i like white gold typically because its often a mix, it has the matching ability of silver with the warmth in color of gold 25. Pop or Rock? i grew up on steve miller and journey from my mom and simon & garfunkel from my dad 26. Dancing or singing? all i can think of is my shitty karoke the other night, so uh dancing, at least i don’t suck more at that when im drunk 27. Checkers or chess? checkers is easier and i could probably actually win, but chess is more likely to hold my attention 28. Board games or video games? we used to do family board game nights (im currently holding the winnign streak for clue because any games played without everyone dont count) (my extended family is also obsessed with card games, its how we bond, we talk shit and play cards) 29. Wine or beer? wine if i have to have one of these, i dont like fizzy stuff ever so no beer but wine dries out my mouth 30. Freckles or dimples? i have freckles, and i love it when people have dimples 31. Honey mustard or BBQ sauce? i guess bbq 32. Body weight exercises or lifting weights? idk what body weight exercises includes but i have always liked lifting weights, its something im fairly good at 33. Baseball or basketball? BASEBALL IS THE BEST I LOVE IT, i miss playing it so much but its been too long for me to feel comfortable joining an intramural team 34. Crossword puzzles or sudokus? sudoku...i think 35. Facial hair or clean shaven? preference right, um stubble.... im not big on full beards (probs cuz my dad has always had one, seriously pics from when he was 20 we are the exact same but he has a beard, he says he hasnt shaved his upper lip since he was 16) clean shaven is nice too tho 36. Crushed ice or cubed ice? i prefer no ice, but if i have to i like that ice you get in hospital cafeterias 37. Skiing or snowboarding? never been 38. Smile or game face? smirking, its the happy medium 39. Bracelet or necklace? i feel naked without any piece of my jewelry (watch on right wrist, a bracelet on my left, a necklace for me to fidget with, both sets of earrings) 40. Fruit or vegetables? fruit 41. Sausage or bacon? bacon 42. Scrambled or fried? scrambled unless its on toast 43. Dark chocolate or white chocolate? dark chocolate 44. Tattoos or piercings? i have two sets of piercings and i just got my first tattoo last month 45. Antique or brand new? antique unless its something i would feel like i couldnt be comfortable using, i always wind up with a very eclectic mix 46. Dress up or dress down? dress down, never really have a reason to dress up 47. Cowboys or aliens? cowboys, space gives me anxiiety 48. Cats or dogs? dogs 49. Pancakes or waffles? depends on who is making the pancakes 50. Bond or Bourne? uhhhh what 51. Sci-Fi or fantasy? fantasy 52. Numbers or letters? letters 53. Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings? lotr tbh 54. Fair or theme park? fair, i grew up in puyallup (look it up, i can even sing the old theme song) 55. Money or fame? money, i want to buy my parents and aunt nice things 56. Washing dishes or doing laundry? laundry (no icky wet food pieces!) {this is what @trevorfindsthestrals had i just could not have said it any better myself} 57. Snakes or sharks? ummm snakes? cuz theyre smaller and i can run from them if theyre dangerous 58. Orange juice or apple juice? orange 59. Sunrise or sunset? sunsets seem more satisfactory to me 60. Slacker or over-achiever?.....i dont’ know how to answer this question 61. Pen or pencil? pencil, unless im worried about it smudging, then i bought some erasable pens for that 62. Peanut butter or jelly? peanut butter is more filling but i make jam every year so theres that 63. Grammys or Oscars? oscars 64. Detailed or abstract? why cant we do both, like a painting that is overall abstract but the closer you get the more you see the things that make it what it is, ya know, like life 65. Multiple choice questions or essay questions? idk multiple choice questions are harder to get wrong for not having enough info about a particular topic, but im good at and enjoy bsing things 66. Adventurous or cautious? i wish i was more adventurous but insecurities 67. Saver or spender? yes 68. Glasses or contacts? i dont wear either 69. Laptop or desktop? laptop 70. Classic or modern? what medium 71. Personal chef or personal fitness trainer? i would like a personal trainer until i get back in the habit of it and then i would jsut need a gym buddy 72. Internet or cell phone? cell since you cna get internet on your phone 73. Call or text? social anxiety so texting  74. Curly hair or straight? mine is beach wavy 75. Shower in the morning or shower in the evening? ive been showering in the morning because i like what it does to my hair 76. Spicy or mild? spicy please 77. Marvel or DC? wonder woman was my first favorite character, like about the time that bugs life came out because i obviously had two and the other was Flick  78. Paying a mortgage or paying rent? rent, i like assurance but i dont like permanence 79. Sky dive or bungee jump? never been but uh im not that trusting so i probably am jsut gonna go with a no 80. Oreos or Chips Ahoy? chewy chips ahoy 81. Jello or pudding? jello 82. Truth or dare? im a chicken so truth 83. Roller coaster or Ferris wheel? roller coaster, ferris wheels are all of the fear with none of the fun 84. Leather or denim? I NEED BOTH I CANT CHOOSE 85. Stripes or solids? stripes and fat people lol no, solids for me 86. Bagels or muffins? bagels probably 87. Whole wheat or white? whole wheat 88. Beads or pearls? pearls, my mother was a jeweler for 13 years, i cant not 89. Hardwood or carpet? hard wood in a hall, tile or linoleum in the kitchen and bathroom and then carpet everywhere else 90. Bright colors or neutral tones? uhhhh for what, cuz it really depends  91. Be older than you are or younger than you are? i want to be like 34, not rn obviously, im enjoying being 20 and stupid, but i feel like 34 is a good age, of course thats abotu how old my bros were when i idolized them so that might be reflective of that 92. Raisins or nuts? raisins, partially because every time my dad sees nuts he says nuts for the nutty and it has become a conditioned response for me now 93. Picnic or nice restaurant? picnic 94. Black leather or brown leather? brown 95. Long hair or short hair? mines somewhere in the middle 96. “Ready, aim, fire” or “Ready, fire, aim”? wtf does the second even mean 97. Fiction or non-fiction? fiction 98. Smoking or non-smoking? i have asthma 99. Think before you talk or talk before you think? i wish i could think before i talk more than i actually do 100. Asking questions or answering questions? i like to listen to people imma tag: @kiavachiisanoob @warriorsatthedisco @colecast1 and anyone lookinng for an excuse to do one of these

[totoroses]

i found this lesbian survey and decided to fill it out!

Femme or butch? is this what do i prefer or which i am? im a femme and i have no preference in dating, i’ve been wildly attracted to both and any in between

Do you have a “type”? If so, describe it. the only nearly completely common denominator though my exes are having brown eyes? i have dated only one person who did not have brown eyes. i always feel safer looking into brown eyes then blue. i woudl say i have often gone after the romantic artsy type with good music taste and some kind of signature style about them, ironically none of which drew me to my current girlfriend who i believe is probably defintiely the love of my life

Plaid button-ups or leather jackets? leather jackets! i will swoon over smartly dressed gals in button downs as well as a chill gal in some plaid unbuttoned flannel but the two together make me think of a lumberjack

Describe your style. i usually go for one of two styles- softly dressed forest wanderer, or slightly sassy soft grunge. both include my doc martens, but one is more natural colours and old fashioned dresses and the other is sassy tshirts and 90sish thrift store finds like denim and dark florals

Describe your aesthetic.pressed flowers between the pages of a book on forest spirits, rose milk tea, silver rainy downpours, curly baby hairs, white peaches, a cat sleeping in a library, custard pastries, a circle of mushrooms in moss, opals and furry moths

Favorite article of clothing? my one forever 21 dress ive had since like junior year that i can wear without a bra and it has like a cool cross back i just looooveee ittt, then also my embroidered minty 1930s style qipao sort of dress

Favorite pair of shoes? my doc martens and green chinese embroidered lace up slippers

Current haircut? currently blonde (ugh) and currently my hair falls just past my breasts, the goal is to grow it to my bellybutton!

Any haircut goals for the future? i really wanna get on the thick fluffy bangs bandwagon but i dont think i have the stamina to put up with growing them out again smh

Describe the best date you’ve been on. there was this one date i went on with one of my high school girlfriends where we went to a bookstore and hung out and then stuck googly eyes all over my city on random monuments and street signs, and we also ate thai food and listened to music and it was still one of the most lovely dates. BUT my girlfriend recently visited me in taiwan and we went in a glass bottom gondola ride up a mountain and drank from coconuts and wandered through old streets and had the most amazing tea food with a spectacular view and it was heaven

Describe the worst date you’ve been on. probably the one where i went on a picnic with my first girlfriend who then broke up with me that same day and even though our entire relationship was so awkward and not what is should have been it still hurt so bad

Single? Taken? taken!

If taken, talk about your girlfriend/wife! where do i begin! my girlfriend is a slightly shorter than me girl named lynn who loved korean variety shows, drinking coca cola, listening to cheesy love songs, and playing tricks on people (especially me). she used to be a major tomboy in middle and high school and date all the girls and get slapped a lot, as well as mess with teachers and play pranks on them and steal things from their lunchboxes. more than half of her birthchart including sun, rising, and venus are scorpio, and she wants to start her own streetstyle online brand but has not yet found a catchy brand name!

If single, what are you looking for in a potential girlfriend/wife? :)

Describe your dream wedding my girlfriend says if we get married we need two, a traditional chinese wedding (she is from china) and a western one with a priest since i am catholic, and i couldnt agree more. my dream wedding includes just very close friends and family, extravagant lights and flowers and a reception party playlist chosen by me, catered by the teahouse we went to in taiwan. i know its so silly and superficial but i want the dreamiest dress that i design, wisteria everywhere, and most of all i just want lynn at the end of the alter looking stunning in whatever it is she decides to wear

Do you want kids? YES me and lynn talk about this a lot because we both love kids and both agree on at least 4, no more than 8. and we will share who carries the kids so not just one of us is having our uteruses worn out

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live? guilin, china. but its a fantasy. guilin is real and beautiful but chinese laws make it so that even if we settle down there and build a house it cant truly belong to us, and in china you cant have a private business and it jsut sucks because the drema is to live in the quiet countryside with a simple life and beautiful scenery to explore together and with our children

Favorite lesbian movie? i love so many but im gonna go with the handmaiden!

Favorite lesbian novel/story? i havent read nearly enough, but  adore all things by malinda lo and julie anne peters! ash by malinda lo is probably my favourite. i have to still read sarah waters though, i hear she reigns supreme

Favorite lesbian song? don’t pull away by milosh ft jviews (the music video is gay at least, i also love hayley kiyoko)

Favorite lesbian musician? hayley kiyoko probably

What lesbian stereotypes do you fit into, if any? mmmm i dont like softball so that doesnt work...i read a lot of sappho though! and i have short nails? and love buffy? are these stereotypes?

Ever been assumed to be nothing more than a gal pal? ugh yes

If a woman wanted to woo you, what would a surefire way to accomplish that? write me a love letter or make me a mixtape about your feleings something cheesy

Be positive! What do you like most about being a lesbian? girls!!!!

Are you more of a cat person or a dog person? cat but i also love pups!

Turn ons? a musical wonderful voice i could listen to and listen to, easy and stimulating conversations, passion for something that lights up their eyes

Turn offs? rudeness in any shape or form, indecisiveness or feigning indecisiveness because you think i want to make the decisions, despicable movie and music taste, smell

Do you usually ask other women out or do you wait for them to ask you? mmmm in the past it has been pretty even. i have learned though that with women it really is a waiting game more than with guys so with my current girlfriend the tension was killing me so much i had to straight up ask her if something was going on and when she said yes she did like me too i was so relieved because she admitted to having not dated anyone since high school (5 years ago for her) and not asking anyone out while at college so if i had kept waiting for her who knows if we would have gotten together!

What is your dream career? i want to be a stay at home mom and author and perhaps an art teacher or preschool teacher on the side if the books dont pa the bills!

Talk about your interests or hobbies! writing and reading and drawing and singing and hiking and listening to music and watching korean dramas and making lists and studying languages

What is the most attractive quality a woman can have? passion, not necessarily in the sexual wya, but passion for something in general. like if she is an actress you see her on the stage and see how into it she is, and offstage she talks about it in a way that shows she is capable of truly loving something so much and seeing wonder in life. or a girl who seems quiet but then when she starts to show you the music she likes she closes her eyes and knows every lyric and has this expression of true passion and love for the music, i am captivated by women who are captivated by the purest elements of life from music to dance to nature

Do you love easily or does it take time for you to warm up to someone? for women, i fall in infatuation quite easily. i was always more cautious with men of course and now i avoid them altogether. but love is something i’ve been becoming more conservative of somehow. i think because i was so hurt by someone before and gave and gave without receiving and im scared of that happening again. i have to be receiving love to give it, thats something i finally can control my impulses over and protect myself from.

Ever fallen for your best-friend? HA

Ever fallen for a straight girl? HAHA

The L-Word: yes or no? (love it or hate it?) heck to the no i couldnt make it past two episodes 

Favorite comfort food? macaroni and cheese

Coffee or tea? tea

Vegetarian? Vegan? None of the above? none but i have tried vegetarian before

Do you have any pets? a chinchilla and a cat!

Early-riser or night-owl? night owl 

What is your sign? gemini sun, sag moon, sag rising

What is your Myers-Briggs type? INFP

Who was your first lesbian crush? my first serious lesbian crush was on a girl at my middle school who dressed to the nines every day in vintage dresses and sweaters and she flirted with practically everyone just joking around and always had a boyfriend but was just charming in every way. my whoel day would eb ruined if i couldn’t just see her or say hello once, and i thought i was just obsessed until i was like ‘wait what if she kissed me’ and BAM i knew it was a real life crush

At what age did you know you were a lesbian? im not really sure. i identified as bi/pan from freshman year to junior year i think, but then was realizing i definitely had a preference and didn’t want to be with guys in a relationship at all to be honest but even up until last summer i was really questioning if i was asexual, so its been a journey but i think i finally fully realized i am a happy happy lesbian after meeting lynn

At what age did you come out (if you have)? i was 14 when i first told my parents i was bi, 18 when i said im a lesbian 

Are you crushing on anyone at the moment (celebrity or otherwise)? just my girly friend

Talk about how your day went i worked this morning 7-11 after only sleeping 4 hours since i got hooked on ‘tipping the velvet’ the bbc miniseries, said goodbye to a friend, had school and did a presentation on how to make rosemilk bubble tea, i ate at a moomin cafe with my coworker, and now am working on homework and doing this survey and putting off my night cleaning duties eheh

Talk about your dreams/aspirations for the future  i just want to have a family and to have my books published, thats all i really need. a loving wife, my sister still by my side as my partner in crime, so many children, so many stories finally told that people are reading. i really want to build a lovely house for my family like my grandparents did once upon a time, with secret rooms and unique hiding places, a house they can pass down as they grow up and it can have our lineage. i want to live by the mountains and trees and water, i want to be able to speak mandarin, cantonese, korean, japanese, icelandic, italian, arabic, and polish fluently

[dunadaan]

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i started getting into makeup again bc i just want to get better. i have very sensitive dry skin and i’ve always really really hated the feel of makeup and always immediately wash it off when i get home. ive never found the right shade, never had a makeup that didnt make my face look weird/cover my scars and never had one that didnt make me feel gross. i always wanted some magical product that does maximum coverage in one easy step and then boom im out the door but it just.doesnt exist.

i wanna look good and try new things and honestly esp for cosplay too. i cant get better w/o practising though so i broke out my ben nye kit from stage makeup and kinda played with it, trying to remember what i learned. the ben nye is cream and honestly i think its not a great start for contouring bc im not good at blending- either i blend too much or too little and its like aaaah a solid dark line on my face lol. I also dont have very many tools so im thinking after i get my computer im gonna try and invest some money into decent supplies to build from. 

im also not?? entirely sure about what shape my face is. is it square? rectangle? oblong? theres different contouring and highlighting rules for each one and sometimes i just want to submit a photo of me to someone and be like hey, can you just. tell me what to put where. please. draw on the picture idc i just wanna know.

but also i gotta learn how to do my own face before i can really start to dabble into making my face look like other faces. Assumpta Serna and I have similarly shaped faces, but our noses, lips, and i believe cheekbones are a bit different. hers are a little sharper and her nose is too, and when i get my cosplay done of her I want to be able to look like her too, not just like myself in her outfit. another major problem i have with makeup is never finding the right shade. Looks fine in store? horrifically pink in sunglight. Looks fine in sunlight? Horriffying under other lighting. I'm not sure if theres a perfect balance. I don't know how to find my undertone either, and it kills me. My face is very sensitive so it gets red easily and it's almost impossible for me to tell. (I'm also...not great at differentiating between certain colors, like certain shades of green and blue, so the wrist trick for the vein color doesnt really work for me). I'm thinking of maybe trying out that new thing that one makeup brand came out with where you like, use a phone to match your skin tone and you get your own custom shades but. i dont really trust that?? but also im desperate so when i get more money im gonna try.

so anyways I just played around a bit and I think I should probably get a powder set once i can maybe find a decent foundation tone. Maybe I can have the cream ben nye foundation and then a powder contour? I also didnt realize how many steps there were for...makeup in general, i guess. the lighting in my room is really poor so i looked a bit silly with my too pale highlighter (i used white instead of my lightest color bc in the dark it didnt look great, but in the mirror i looked like a vampire lol).

i think another thing is that i was really miserable in that stage makeup class for months. I was the only one there with 0 prior experience to makeup, and the professor graded me harder bc i had a background in art so i would know where shadows fell or whatever and i just- i dont! I dont know shit about how to apply art to makeup and I was on the verge of tears so many nights bc of it. Also bc the girl next to me had a degree in cosmetology and had flawless makeup and was done with everything in like 5 minutes- when you're seated next to two other people and theyre done an hour before you it's a mortifying and humiliating experience, even if i shouldnt be comparing myself i still did. i still dont really felt like i learned a lot, and fashion makeup is a lot different from stage makeup- stage makeup being very pronounced and over the top so it reaches the furthest rows and doesnt wash out in the light, so i always blended too much. it was frustrating. reminds me to invest in lights too, i guess?

i dont really know where to go from here, but i guess its just practice. i dont usually look up tutorials just bc either they use different products or have a different face shape and im usually too tired to go and look for something that could work for me but oh well. i guess the first real step is figuring out just what my face shape is and then work from there.

[jellybeanisrockin]

65 Questions You Aren't Used To: by rainbowsociety

I warned you,,..... 1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you? sort of but i mostly just doubt everythings existence and human intelligence and emotions 2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you? 1 maybe 2 if i'm walking past a mirror 3. The person you would never want to meet? that dude from that one horror movie you know who,,,,,,that guy,,,. 4. What is your favorite word? bellemy, contingency, or salutations 5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be? idk a dead one 6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought? wtf I'm ugly 7. What shirt are you wearing? a dr. suess shirt i know i'm such a charmer right 8. What do you label yourself as? an anxious lesbian with crippling depression (i kno join the club) 9. Bright room or dark room? meh dark probably 10. What were you doing at midnight last night? looking up the awkward lesbians guide to life on tumblr 11. Favorite age you’ve been so far? -11/12 12. Who told you they loved you last? my dad probably since i am Forever Alone™️ 13. Your worst enemy? trump that bastard 14. What is your current desktop picture? a pic i took of the sky 15. Do you like someone? unfortunately yes cri (Forever Alone™️) 16. The last song you listened to? Breakdown by Jack Johnson 17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? Mike Pence 18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face? these turdnuggets in my english class who keep complaining how gay people try to force their gayness on the poor innocent heteros ugh 19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do? shower me with needless affection and cuddle me (or buy me some pez either works) 20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional) idk i guess my facial area is ok i have,,,um,,hair? that is clean,,,,,,?, 21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do? get myself a nice bod and go hang with some hot ladies 🔥🔥🔥 (jk id probably just be a lazy ass and watch netflix all day or something) 22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it? noooooooo,.,...,,,,,,,..cri 23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of? geese and hmm and that whenever i use the restroom i have to check behind the shower curtains to make sure no ones hiding there 24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal. ummm a incredibly large thing with just that expensive ham meat stuff 25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it? caanddy cuz im an idiot 26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go? id sell it to someone cuz traveling makes me anxious 27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be? bunch of expensive vodka or moonshine that i could sell to get mooooooneeeeeey 28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?  everyone has to be gay 29. What is your favorite expletive? hot damn 30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno? electronic device 31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? end of 2nd grade..... 32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! oh CANADA🇨🇦!!!! 33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? my older friends brother 34. What was your last dream about? i was a fugitive and jumping and hiding on roofs 35. Are you a good kisser? hhhhhhhh i d o n t k n o w hhhhhh 36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? yess 37. Have you ever built a snowman? kindof he was mainly mulch 38. What is the color of your socks? white (im so boring) 39. What type of music do you like? chill or rock music also oldies like Diana Ross and You make me feel so young 40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? sunsets 41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? i domt like em -_- 42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer) whhhaaaataresports??????..?,,. 43. Do you have any scars? yes one in the middle of my nose 44. What do you want to be when you graduate? an architect or product designer maybe 45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? my body or smile 46. Are you reliable? kind of im forgettful but super loyal if thats what u mean 47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? when will you get a gf u assicle 48. Do you hold grudges? not really 49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create? narwhal and horse 50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had? rainbow dick tats or maybe how do dogs and whales hiccup 51. Are you a good liar? i actually really enjoy small lying and i am quite good at white lies and tricking people into believing random things but i dont usually lie about something important 52. How long could you go without talking? probably a while 53. What has been you worst haircut/style? bangs shudder 54. Have you ever baked your own cake? yes 55. Can you do any accents other than your own? eh kinda 56. What do you like on your toast? dont like toast yuck 57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of? a technical drawing of a subway sandwich and its ingredients along with a very detailed description to my dad 58. What would be you dream car? RAINBOWS!!!!! 59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain. yes as well as some other,..,things., 60. Do you believe in aliens? yes 61. Do you often read your horoscope? sometimes 62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet? Q 63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons? dragons 64. What do you think about babies? ehhhh they're ugly

[terybogard]

Home sick, huh? Well in that case... all of them....

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? 

spot

is your room messy or clean?

a pile of games and blankets, its also tiny

what color are your eyes?

real dark brown

do you like your name? why?

i used to hate it as a kid bc i thought it was too girly but im cool with it now, its uncommon which is cool plus my initials are djp which makes me feel like a cool dj

what is your relationship status?

describe your personality in 3 words or less

three sega saturns

what color hair do you have?

dark broum

what kind of car do you drive? color?

a white volvo

where do you shop?

game stores that arent game stomp

how would you describe your style?

clothes that i have a sentimental bond with

favorite social media account

i guess this one

what size bed do you have?

full

any siblings?

i got the bros: calvin @dragonquestviii3ds and andrew @insanecowposse

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

somewhere cold i dont like hot weather

favorite snapchat filter?

the one that makes dark pictures look like a corrupt jpeg

favorite makeup brand(s)

huh

how many times a week do you shower?

when im dirty

favorite tv show?

adventures of sonmnic the hedgeshog$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

shoe size?

9

how tall are you?

i was 5′7 but scoliosis shrunk me so now im ever so slightly below that

sandals or sneakers?

sneanks

do you go to the gym?

buff

describe your dream date

neo turf masters with

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

probably a penny and a bunch of used up gift cards

what color socks are you wearing?

white and ornge

how many pillows do you sleep with?

a lot

do you have a job? what do you do?

no

how many friends do you have?

all yall

whats the worst thing you have ever done?

i used to hit myself when i was mad at me

whats your favorite candle scent?

i like the fruity ones

3 favorite boy names

chungus bungus mumbus

3 favorite girl names

mom friend chungy

favorite actor?

i dunno anyone

favorite actress?

still dont know anyone

who is your celebrity crush?

does the obvious count

favorite movie?

the sonic ova movie is special to me we have it on cassette and its been here forever

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?

not really

money or brains?

you think id hang out with some rich chunkus? no

do you have a nickname? what is it?

my grandma calls me dais i guess

how many times have you been to the hospital?

not much

top 10 favorite songs

get ready for a lotta blur also theyre not really in order

1. tender - blur

2. no distance left to run - also blur

3. sweet girl - fleetfloop mac

4. welcome to the room sara - flopflop mac

5. the universal - also blur

6. sable on blond - stevie nicks

7. the tourist - rabioheab

8. black book - blur again

9. every song from the donkey kong country tv show

10. young and lovely - blibb blur burbvvmmmm

do you take any medications daily?

yeah 2 antidepressants

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

im an oil

what is your biggest fear?

no thanks

how many kids do you want?

no thanks

whats your go to hair style?

short kinda messy

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)

my moms is kinda small and my dads is kinda big i think

who is your role model?

gun waifu

what was the last compliment you received?

friends wanting to buy me nice drinks bc im sick

what was the last text you sent?

telling buds im sick

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

i forget

what is your dream car?

i dunno one with character if that makes sense

opinion on smoking?

if you do it im not gonna hate you but i really would like you to try to stop

do you go to college?

i applied

what is your dream job?

fix games

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?

somewhere

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

i havent been to a hotel in years

do you have freckles?

not really

do you smile for pictures?

yeah

how many pictures do you have on your phone?

a lot most of them are gun waifu

have you ever peed in the woods?

i think

do you still watch cartoons?

yeah

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

i dont eat a meat

Favorite dipping sauce?

soy sauce

what do you wear to bed?

clothes

have you ever won a spelling bee?

i was qualified to go to one sort of but i didnt

what are your hobbies?

draw fix game play game u kno

can you draw?

you decide

do you play an instrument?

nou

what was the last concert you saw?

i think it was blur i cried a lot it was great

tea or coffee?

leaf woter

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

donk donts

do you want to get married?

i have gun waifu

what is your crush’s first and last initial?

g(un) w(aifu)

are you going to change your last name when you get married?

daisy waifu sounds silly doesnt it he he he

what color looks best on you?

i dunno red and white

do you miss anyone right now?

i have a lotta friends at college or army and i wont see them much for a while

do you sleep with your door open or closed?

close usually

do you believe in ghosts?

a ghost try to approach me he got leery

what is your biggest pet peeve?

be jerk

last person you called

i got a call from my grandma

favorite ice cream flavor?

a good one

regular oreos or golden oreos?

oroeos

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?

chonk

what shirt are you wearing?

a shirt for our family dairy theres a cow on it and it says have a very dairy christmas

what is your phone background?

gun waifu

are you outgoing or shy?

i am me

do you like it when people play with your hair?

i dunno havent really experienced hairplay

do you like your neighbors?

my one neighbor collects games so his yard sales are always amazing

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

when its dorty

have you ever been high?

no

have you ever been drunk?

no

last thing you ate?

i forget

favorite lyrics right now

theres a lotta trick stuff that makes ya fall into a trap

summer or winter?

winter boyssssssssss

day or night?

day

dark, milk, or white chocolate?

milnk

favorite month?

october or december i dunno

what is your zodiac sign

scoopio

who was the last person you cried in front of?

my bud @clumsyrubicunda bc we were watching............ anime.......

thank you if you are on mobile i apologize

[ratpresenting]

1-100

Unusual asks! 1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify all the way, I have like, 40 playlists and I use it every day2. Is your room messy or clean?So messy, but I clean it up once it really bugs me3. What color are your eyes?Green-ish?4. Do you like your name? why?Not really, it's a really common name and i don't really feel it fits me, but I'm fine with it. My middle name is Elizabeth and I've always wanted to go by Eli but its too far gone now5. What is your relationship status? I'll stick with complicated6. Describe your personality in 3 words or lessFriendly, obnoxious, anxious7. What color hair do you have?Dirty blond8. What kind of car do you drive? color?I don't have a car, but if I'm saving up for one and its going to be a motorcycle, not a car. 📣(I hate everything about cars!!!)9. Where do you shop?Mostly thrift stores and consignment stores10. How would you describe your style?Like, 80s mom meets 90s grunge meets modern goth witch11. Favorite social media accountProbably twitter at this point12. What size bed do you have? Queen 👑13. Any siblings?A half-sister, shes a little older than me though, and she lives across the country, but i love her and miss her!14. If you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?Probably Eastern Canada because my family is super Canadian and i just love it there15. Favorite snapchat filter? Idk any really, I guess that one that makes ur eyes and mouth really big because my friend uses it alot and its so funny!16. Favorite makeup brand(s)Mostly Tarte and Urban Decay; Tarte because I'm allergic to most other shit and Urban Decay because I love the Naked palettes and I will suffer for them17. How many times a week do you shower?I wash my hair every few days but I shower like once a week in the winter and every couple days in the summer18. Favorite tv show?Brooklyn 99 or Game of Thrones19. Shoe size?8-ish20. How tall are you?5'9" if I stand up straight21. Sandals or sneakers? Depends on where I'm going, I like my feet to breathe, but boots and sneakers can be so cool and really put together and outfit22. Do you go to the gym? I have a gym membership that I sometimes use, but not having a vehicle right now is imposing on that23. Describe your dream dateA date that keeps going. Starting with food or drinks or whatever, and having such a good time that you keep it going and you go somewhere else, and another place. Enjoying each others' company so much that you don't want the night to end, even if that means staying up until the sun comes up. It doesn't matter if we're just sitting in a park talking and smoking cigarettes, its that neverending want that matters to me. 24. How much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?Cash, $12. I mostly use my debit card so i don't really carry cash25. What color socks are you wearing? I am not wearing socks right now because I am in bed but usually black26. How many pillows do you sleep with?1 under my head but usually at least 3 in my bed, well as all the shit thats on the left half of my bed27. Do you have a job? what do you do? Yes I work at a restaurant called Tokyo Joe's, I'm the unofficial assistant manager, and I am most often making sushi or taking out food and such.28. How many friends do you have? Including work friends I have 5, not including work I have 3. 29. Whats the worst thing you have ever done? Broke up a couple. Its whole thing.30. Whats your favorite candle scent? This candle I got from Ross, its tobacco leaf and Rose, but I'm more of an incense gal31. 3 favorite boy namesCharlie, Adrian, and Danny32. 3 favorite girl namesEli, Andi, and Dani (These and the last 3 are interchangable because I like genderless names)33. Favorite actor? Idk any off the top of my head, mostly because I kind of hate men, I really like Chadwick Boseman's acting, and I really like Leonardo DiCaprio as a person34. Favorite actress? This is really hard because I love lots of ladies, but acting wise I like Charlize Theron and Natalie Portman I guess? Idk I've seen like 7 movies. I love my gal Kristen Stewart though35. Who is your celebrity crush?I have several, more well known being the aforementioned kstew, and some lesser known names such as Lynn Gunn, Paris Jackson, and Hannah Hart36. Favorite movie? This is so hard, I guess the lotr trilogy because I can always watch that if I want to. I'm really more of a tv show kinda gal37. Do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? I used to when I was younger, I stopped when my depression took over pretty much my whole life, but I've been slowly getting back into it. I used to read a lot of teen fiction and my favorite was always Harry Potter, but now my favorite book is probably Through the Looking Glass, just because I loved it as a kid and its a nice nostalgia read, as well as a unique and creative book.38. Money or brains? Always brains.39. Do you have a nickname? what is it? Not really but I wish I did!40. How many times have you been to the hospital?I myself have had to go to the hospital only once that I can remember, ( I crashed my motorcycle) but other than that a few times for visiting family/ friends41. Top 10 favorite songsIn no particular order-Anyone Else, Pvris-Somebody Else, The 1975-In A Week, Hozier-Cherry Wine, Hozier-Pork Soda, Glass Animals-Interlude 1, Alt-J-Agnes, Glass Animals-If I Believe You, The 1975-Obsidian, Trevor Hall-From The Dining Table, Harry Styles42. Do you take any medications daily? I'm supposed to take allergy medicine but I never do so no43. What is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)Kind of on the dry side, I'm a lucky shit though because I barely take care of it and its pretty nice and soft44. What is your biggest fear? Everyone hating me45. How many kids do you want? A couple, adopted only46. Whats your go to hair style?I have pretty short hair thats curly. The sides and back are short and the top is curly, parted on the left,so it hangs just above my right eye47. What type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) Smallish condo with my ma!48. Who is your role model? Hannah Hart!49. What was the last compliment you received?My coworker said I have a very elegant air to me, especially when I tell stories, because I always cross my legs and i talk very extravagantly with my hands50. What was the last text you sent?My coworker Kaylee❤ dropped me off and I let her know I was in my house because you can't see my house from the street and she worries51. How old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?I don't think I ever believed in him?52. What is your dream car? I'm gonna replace car with motorcycle and its an Zero SR ❤53. Opinion on smoking?Unfortunately, I smoke. I love cigarettes! I smoke Newport 100s. I bought a vape to help me smoke less and it definitely helps!54. Do you go to college? Ya, I'm very slowly getting my associates at MCC55. What is your dream job? I have no idea, but something I enjoy doing, and hopefully something that makes changes for the better56. Would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? I truly just want to live in the middle of the woods and be a woodland witch 57. Do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? No, I have too expensive of shampoo for that and thats a stupid waste of plastic.58. Do you have freckles? Not like the classic type, but I have some random ones on my body.59. Do you smile for pictures?Almost always60. How many pictures do you have on your phone? Over 200061. Have you ever peed in the woods? Yes, I've been camping several times62. Do you still watch cartoons? Not really63. Do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?I don't eat chicken nuggets because they are 1. Chicken and 2. Garbage64. Favorite dipping sauce? Balsamic vinegar or Sriracha, depending on what it is. 65. What do you wear to bed? I sleep nakey 66. Have you ever won a spelling bee?Maybe? I don't know67. What are your hobbies?Sometimes reading, sometimes writing, alot of staring at my wall in the dark while listening to music68. Can you draw? Not well, but thats not gonna stop me!69. Do you play an instrument?Nope70. What was the last concert you saw? I haven't been to a concert in a really long time but i think the 1975? 71. Tea or coffee?TeaStarbucks or Dunkin Donuts?72. Dunkin has better coffee but Starbucks has better literally everything else, and the Starbucks next to my work is literally my sanctuary and all the gals that work there are such sweethearts I love them all so much even though they probably hate me.73. Do you want to get married?Someday far from now, and really only for adoption purposes74. What is your crush’s first and last initial?Denied75. Are you going to change your last name when you get married? Idk it depends if their last name is coer than mine76. What color looks best on you? Probably blue but im partial to black77. Do you miss anyone right now? Yes78. Do you sleep with your door open or closed?Closed79. Do you believe in ghosts?Yes!80. What is your biggest pet peeve? Rudeness just to be rude81. last person you calledMy coworker Kaylee❤82. Favorite ice cream flavor? I'm more of a shaved ice or sorbet gal, but i love the Ben and Jerry's line of almond and coconut milk ice creams!83. Regular oreos or golden oreos? Lemon!84. Chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? I guess chocolate? Rainbow sprinkles are literally flavorless sugar85. What shirt are you wearing? I was wearing an old '92 Hard Rock Cafe shirt from Hawaii that I snatched from my ma and turned into a crop too86. What is your phone background?My home screen is a golden sunset cloud photo I took a while back and my lockscreen is a picture i took in the woods of a tree with mushrooms growing on it87. Are you outgoing or shy?I am usually shy but I work customer service so if I have to be I can be very outgoing, its so draining though88. Do you like it when people play with your hair?Yes! Please do!89. Do you like your neighbors? I mean, I don't know them but 2 of the 3 smoke weed so they're probably pretty cool!90. Do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?Look it gets washed when it gets washed let's not discuss it91. Have you ever been high? I spent ages 17-19 almost exclusively high. I don't really remember a lot of it92. Have you ever been drunk? Yes, several times. I am a lovey drunk and I love to kiss when I'm drunk. Or cry. Just depends who I'm around93. Last thing you ate? Diced cucumbers with lemon and salt and some white rice with peanut sauce and onions94. Favorite lyrics right now"Where does your body go when I leave you alone?Would your heart know if I met you in a brand new set of bones?Cause you may see me in different bodiesHiding below with the same soul"Same Soul, Pvris95. Summer or winter? Winter, but only because I live in Arizona so winter means like, 70 degrees96. Day or night? I like being out and about at night but there's no where to go because everything is closed97. Dark, milk, or white chocolate? Only dark. Like, at least 80% dark98. Favorite month? I like October, the weather is nice and it has a fun atmosphere, plus Halloween!99. What is your zodiac sign?My Sun sign is Capricorn, but I have an Aquarius Stellium and I kind of identify with that more100. Who was the last person you cried in front of? Technically my cat this morning. I don't do alot of public crying. Lots of private crying though! I'm a big baby of emotions