#i think i wrote an exam essay once about why he might have done that

[finelythreadedsky]

i have to believe that euripides' decision to elide polydorus (only son of cadmus, father of labdacus and grandfather of laius) from the bacchae, making cadmus' line and the royal house of thebes extinct with the death of pentheus and the exile of cadmus, was to spite sophocles and his history of writing successful and popular plays about the labdacids

[that-disabled-radfem]

Happy back-to-school y’all

I’ve attended and worked at a couple of super liberal universities. I avoid the gender studies departments for obvious reasons and I still had a lecture in which the female prof gave a brief overview of TERFs and proclaimed her hatred of JKR. Being openly critical of gender ideology, the porn industry, kinks, and ‘sex work’ are the kind of things that can ruin your future in academia. Not to mention the fact that any speech or actions that could be labelled transphobic (ie. defining woman as adult human female) can get you a suspension according to many universities anti-hate-speech policies. 

So, here’s a list of small and smallish (small in terms of overt TERFery, some may require more effort than others) radical feminist actions you can take as a university student:

(this is a liberal arts perspective so if you’re a stem gal this may not apply. but also if you’re in stem maybe you can actually acknowledge that women are oppressed as a sex class without getting kicked out of school. idk)

(Note for TRAs hate reading this: One of the core actions of radical feminism is creating female networks. This is not so that we can brainwash people into being anti-trans. This is because female solidarity is necessary for creating class consciousness and overturning patriarchy. It is harder to subjugate the female sex when we stand together.)

Take classes with female profs. Multiple sections of a class? Pick the one taught by a woman. Have to chose an elective? Only look at electives offered by women. When classes have low numbers they get cancelled. When classes are super popular, universities are forced to consider promoting the faculty that teach them

Make relationships with these female profs. Go to office hours. Chat after class. Ask them about their research. Building female networks is sooooo important!

Actually fill in your end of year course feedback forms. Profs often need these when applying for tenure or applying for a job at another university so it is very important (especially with young and/or new profs) that you fill out these forms and give specific examples of how great these women are. Go off about what you love about them! Give her a brilliant review because you know the idiot boy in that class who won’t shut up even though he knows nothing is going to give her only negative feedback because he thinks any woman who leaves the house is a feminazi b*tch. 

(note: obviously don’t go praising any prof - female or male - who is blatantly racist, homophobic, etc.)

(Also if you have shitty male profs write down all the horrible things they have done and said and put it in these forms because once a shitty man gets tenure they are virtually untouchable)

(also also, leave a good review on rate my profs or whatever other thing students use to figure out if they want to take classes. idc if you copy paste your feedback from the formal review. rave about the class to your friends. do what you can to get good enrolment for that prof for reasons above.)

Participate in class. Talk over the male students. Say what you mean and mean it. Call out the boys when they say dumb shit

Write about women. If you have the option to make a text written by a woman your primary text in an essay, do it. Pick the female-centred option if you’re writing an exam-essay with multiple prompts. (Profs often look at what works on their syllabus are being written about/engaged with as a marker of whether to keep those texts the next time they teach the class. If there are badass women on your syllabus, write about them to keep them on the syllabus) Use female-written secondary sources whenever possible. 

(pro tip: many women in academia are more than happy to talk to you about their papers. expand your female networks by reaching out to article authors through email and asking them about their cool shit)

Get your essays published! Many departments have undergrad journals you can publish in. This will ensure more people read about the women you write about and will demonstrate to the department that people like learning about women

Consider trying to publish your undergrad essay with a legit peer-reviewed journal. If you can do it, your use of female-written secondary sources boosts the reputations of the women who wrote those secondary sources. Also this helps generally to increase scholarship about women’s writing!

Present your papers at conferences! Many schools have their own undergraduate/departmental conferences that you can present at. Push yourself by submitting to outside conferences. Bring attention to women’s works by presenting your papers. Take a space at a conference that would otherwise be reserved for mediocre men

Talk to your profs and/or your department and/or your university about mandating the inclusion of female works in classes if this isn’t something they do already

Sit next to other women in your classes. Talk to them. Make friends. Form study groups. Proofread each other’s essays. Give each other knowing looks when the boys are being dumb. Just interact with other women! Build those female networks!

Be generous with your compliments. A female classmate and I were talking to a prof after class and the classmate told me (out of the blue) that I always have such interesting things to say. I think about that whenever I’m lacking confidence about my academic skills. Compliment the women in your classes for speaking up, for sharing their opinions, for challenging your classmates/profs, for doing cool presentations, etc.

Talk to other women about sexist things going on on campus. Make everyone aware of the sexist profs. Complain about how there are many more tenured men than tenured women. Go on rate my professor and be explicit about how the sexist profs are sexist

Be active on campus and in societies. If a society has an all male executive or is male-dominated, any women who join that society make it less intimidating for more women to join. Run for executive positions! Bring in more women! 

(Pro tip: Many societies’ elections are super gameable. You can be eligible to vote in a society election sometimes just by being a student at that university — even without having done anything with the society before. Other societies might just require that you’ve taken a class in a particular department or attended a society event. (Check the society’s governing documents.) Use those female networks you’ve been building. If you can bring three or four random people to vote for you, that might be enough for you to win. Societies have trouble meeting quorum (the minimum number of people in attendance to do votes) so it is really super achievable to rig an election with a few friends. And don’t feel bad about this. The system is rigged against women so you have every right to exploit loopholes!)

(Also feel free to go vote “non-confidence”/“re-open election” if only shitty men are running. Too often people see that only candidates they don’t like are running and so they give up. But you can actually stop them getting elected)

Your campus may have a LGBTQIA+alphabetsoup society. That society definitely needs more L and B women representation. It may be tedious to argue with the nb straight dudes who insist that it’s fine to use “q***r” in the society’s posters and that attraction has nothing to do with genitals, but just imagine what could happen if we could make these sorts of societies actually safe spaces for same-sex attracted women and advocated for our concerns

Attend random societies’ election meetings. Get women elected and peace out. (or actually get involved but I’m trying to emphasize the lowest commitment option with this one)

Write for the campus newspaper. Write about what women are doing - women’s sports, cool society activities, whatever. Review female movies, books, tv shows, local theatre productions. Write about sexism on campus. We need more female by-lines and more stories about women

Get involved with your campus’s sexual assault & r*pe hotline/sexual assault survivor’s centre/whatever similar organization your campus has if you can. This is hard work and definitely not for everyone (pls take care of yourself first, especially if you are a survivor)

(If your campus doesn’t have an organization for supporting survivor’s of sexualized violence, start one! This is probably going to be a lot of hard work though, so don’t do it alone)

Talk to your student council about providing free menstrual hygiene products on campus if your campus doesn’t already do this. If your campus provides free condoms (which they probs do), use that as leverage (ie. ‘sex is optional, menstruation is not. so why do we have free condoms and no free pads?’)

If you’re an older student, get involved with younger students (orientation week and such activities are good for this). Show the freshman that you can be a successful and well-liked woman without shaving your legs, wearing heels, wearing make-up, etc. Mentor these young women. Offer to go for coffee or proofread essays. 

Come to class looking like a human being. Be visibly make-up less, unshaven, unfeminine, etc. to show off the many different ways of being a woman

Talk to the custodial staff and learn their names. (I know there are men who work in this profession, but it is dominated by low-income women) Say hi in the hallways, ask them about their lives, show them they’re appreciated

Be explicit with your language. When you are talking about sex-based oppression, say it. Don’t say ‘sex worker’ when you mean survivor of human trafficking. This tip is obviously a bit tricky in terms of overt TERFyness, so use your best judgement

That’s all from me for now! Feel free to add your suggestions and remember that feminism is about action

[sunsents]

Library - James Potter (M)

Heyyy, hey, how ya'll doing?? My exams are over!! Thank you so much for the support and the lovely messages 😙 here's a kith. I know you guys are waiting on Empty part 2, so here's a really short unedited thing?? I wrote a few months ago for you guys to read while you wait. You can really see how much I improved with my recent writing, but I hope you all enjoy this nonetheless while I finish up Empty 2. Enjoy, or don't. Idk.

Summary —> A study sesh turns into something much more when two knuckleheads interrupt you.

Pairing: jamespotter x fem!reader (im sorry to frederick for neglecting my gingeritis religion.)

Word count: a mere 1.4k

Warnings: smut / just filthy sex honestly / cheeky lil breast action /

Rating: 18+

DON’T REPOST MY WORK

You made sure to neatly pile your hoard of essay papers and not mind the ink blotches your palm had left from the hours of work put within. It didn't matter, Slughorn cared about the content rather than esthetic, hopefully. It was no big matter to worry about you told yourself, your handwriting was messy and not the most appealing, but your handiwork in potions was quite the opposite, it was fine.

"Hey ____, still workin' on those?" James Potter's husky voice cracked like a whip in-front of your face, perhaps painful to your ears as well.

You glowered at him, what else were you supposed to do? His antics continued to worsen every day. "What do you want?" your nasally voice caused you to clear your throat, evidence perhaps that you hadn't left the library seat and spoke in hours.

"Just checking in." Sirius Black's pool of hair - black as well - was turned the opposite way, he was gazing at the library books, a most unusual sight for him. "Didn't want you melting outta boredom."

"I'm perfectly fine thanks." you snapped, your head rung in awful thumps of pain but you paid no attention to it.

The corners of James's perfect lips lowered playfully. "You're all snappy, we're doin' nothing." his tone was smooth as silk now, his lips tugging into a playful grin once again. Never was a grin not on James's handsome face.

You took a deep inhale while watching him, you had to anyways. Your fingers were fidgeting together under the table, a view James couldn't hopefully see but the way your rings clicked together made him painfully aware. "Just don't bother me till' I'm done, I'm almost finished."

James nodded, his bottom lip jutting out in a frown once again. You had to roll you eyes, had to do something to make it seem like you weren't enjoying their so called company.

You stretched your head back and enjoyed the feeling of your neck craning and extending for a few moments. It had been a some time since movement was made in your fatigued body. you figured your tied up hair wasn't going to keep intact much longer, so you released the band in a swift move. Your hair cascaded down all the same, then you quickly shot straight and continued to write.

You didn't have time for comforts and stretching, you were close to finishing your essay and that was all that mattered. You didn't even bother asking James if he had done it, because his answer was surely at the ready. He was Head Boy and his marks were all excellent, but when it came to homework it was long forgotten to him.

A slight diversion caused you to look up, James and Sirius were on the ground and a few books had fallen, scattered around the wooden library floor. You scoffed then flicked your wand; the books magicked up and flew back to their original places. "One second and you guys make a mess." you stared, your eyes flashed dangerously. You weren't an intimidating person, at least you liked to think so much unlike what your friends said.

But surely, you easily managed to intimidate the two most popular boys in Hogwarts. They both quickly shot up and took the seats in-front of you. Sirius was apologetically looking down, unlike James who immediately relaxed and sprawled himself out on the plush cushions. Ass, you thought, but didn't say anything.

"Alright what do you want, really." you deadpanned, you knew them for seven years, they weren't fooling you.

James, who was busy wiping his glasses on the fabric of his sweater put them back on and smirked. "You." he simply said.

You rolled her eyes and scoffed all the same, though your stomach was erupting in butterflies. "James why don't you go bother Lily like you always do." you whispered, Madame Pince was glaring at them and you weren't going to risk getting kicked out of the library again.

"No," James started, Sirius merely watched the interaction play out with a smile. "why would I go t'her when I have you right here."

You shot up and squeezed your fists, you weren't going to fall for it, a phrase you had been telling yourself for the past two years when James's interest suddenly piqued on you. "I'm gonna go put these books back."

After pressing the three large books to your chest, you wasted no time getting far away from the two boys as possible. Your heartbeat was rapid, dangerously fast that you thought you might drop dead.

It wasn't much time until you reached the furthest corridor of bookcases, luckily this was the row where you had acquired the books. You walked to the middle and stood on your toes, reaching your hand up and letting the books fly back to their original places. Then, the next book, same process. You were going awfully slow, doing your best to avoid talking to James as much as you could so your burning cheeks could go cool down and your heart would stop trying to thump out of your chest.

The third book, so close to being done until a presence suddenly overpowered you. It was right behind you and awfully familiar, towering over your stretched figure. James' cologne was what gave it away so suddenly, "Let me." his tone was going in spirals, once husky, then silky and now this. Breathless, strained and somehow desperate.

What you didn't realize was your skirt lifting up when you stood tip toe on your legs, your years of Quidditch clearly visible on your body. At least for James anyways. You heard him swallow thickly, then a muscular arm towering over her figure and pushing the last book up.

James sucked in a breath.

It was dizzying, you were never this close to him. A new territory, unfamiliar and intimate, not to mention exciting. Sure he flirted but he never took it too far, you didn't know what to think of it either. He was confident while "flirting" with Lily, he held his chest high and cracked jokes which only made the Lily blush deeper and continue to insult him. His ego boosted whenever Lily would try to hide away her blush, and the usual row of girls on the background sighing with her. It was somehow annoying, seeing James so buttered up.

James exhaled harshly.

But with you it was different, James was the one blushing. An unusual sight, James Potter being flustered but it was true. He would even stutter at times if you playfully flirted back, which happened very rarely. He would start off confident, and it would die down in a matter of seconds.

James was breathing almost heavily now.

You felt proud at sometimes, you even believed that James maybe would be harboring feelings for you. But then that big ole clump in your head would yell 'why would he, he's James Potter. Also, he's been in love with the same girl for years.' and all that hope would dissolve away.

James groaned desperately.

So frankly, you didn't know how you ended up with your skirt hiked up your waist, panties messily tucked aside and thick cock buried to hilt between your walls and continuously slamming into that one, dizzying spot. James' hands slithered around your waist and his arms tightly encircled on your stomach to press. You could feel every single muscle. Every single muscle to from stomach, down his thighs and the flesh between them.

He pressed his chest on your back, whispered the filthiest phrases he could think of to make you writhe, told you how pathetic you were for letting him do this in a ruddy library. Maybe this was what caused him to run a hand up your chest and clasp his hand around your throat. "Keep quiet, don't want anyone seeing you like this." he had told you, and it was the slight roll of his hips that made you unable to answer and barely take it.

You babbled, drooled, worshipped his cock with your sopping cunt until he was telling you that he loved you. He pulled on your chin to kiss you, sloppy and wet and he didn't let you answer. His glasses were pushed behind, rocking back and forth with his body, dangerously close to falling off. He was gorgeous and with your hands propped on the library shelves, you whimpered an "I love you." back. The two of you came, claiming each other and lazy smiles knowing that the feelings the both of you harbored was reciprocated, and the possibility of having something more was true.

[sofoulandfairaday]

The ultimate How I Met Your Mother Finale rant

I know this has been done before, and I know I'm several years late to the party, but I don't care, so IN THIS ESSAY I WILL tell you about why this finale takes the spot as the second-worst finale in TV show history (because Game of Thrones is still, to this day, unbeatable, and it will probably stay like that forever). 

But first, a little context: I've just finished binge-watching HIMYM. This binge has been going on for three days straight (my final exam of the semester is in a week and I should be studying, so the fact that the last few days were a partial waste of time makes me so mad). Second thing: I already knew how it would end, and yes, kids, it does ruin the show for you. It ruins the show so much it makes your blood boil when you rewatch certain scenes, but I will get to that. 

You might want to make yourself a drink because this is a complete list of all the reasons why HIMYM's finale sucks - I'm warning you, it's gonna be looong.

It completely invalidates the entirety of season 9

This is one of the complaints people most often have with this series, and I have to agree. It would have been so much better if the last two episodes never existed, and they just showed Barney and Robin dancing at the reception after walking out of the chapel, Ted noticing Tracy and then the platform scene. "And that, kids, is the story of how I met your mother". Cut scene. Honestly, I don't get the hate people give to season 9, barring the last 2/3 episodes, especially since season 8 was so much worse (except for a few honourable mentions, like The Robin). S8 was slower, less funny, and less deep, and while the authors took a risk by making s9 happen in the span of a weekend it paid off: they took their time introducing the character of the Mother to the gang and fleshing her out. They make sure to highlight all the little ways in which Ted and Tracy are perfect for each other, and even tie up loose ends, like with the Slapsgiving episode, that was a filler but it wasn't boring to watch (although it may be problematic for different reasons, I'm not Chinese, so I can't say for sure if it's cultural appropriation or just the authors making fun of a particular movie genre). 

Some episodes were arguably great: "Daisy" was amazing, and that whole fight between Marshall and Lily was so realistic and well thought out, "Sunrise" was extremely important for Ted's character development, same goes for Tracy and "How Your Mother Met Me", "Bedtime stories" was impressive, "Rally" was incredibly funny and proved once again what a beautiful character Barney Stinson is, so much so that even Robin never has doubts that he (the guy with the biggest commitment issues on the planet) will bail on her before the wedding, and says to Ted that "he always comes back". Daphne's character is super funny and the right amount of annoying, the shenanigans of the gang are well thought out and all of the characters (not just Barney) complete their arc in this season. The last two/three episodes butcher that.

Marshall and Lily

Marshall and Lily, arguably the world's most solid couple, are the only thing this God-awful finale gets right, especially Marshall, who is my second-favourite character, that finally gets everything he deserves. But what about Lily? They never mention her career after Italy, and I refuse to believe she goes back to being a kindergarten teacher as if her year in Rome meant nothing. I also refuse to think she becomes nothing but a political wife, the equivalent of Zoey, but without saving the world. We know she has three kids, but her postpartum depression is never really talked about much and they definitely had the screentime to delve into it. 

Barney

 Where do I even begin? Barney Stinson is, without a doubt, the best character in this series, the glue of the whole gang. I think the message they were trying to give is that, since his trauma stemmed from the absence of a father figure in his life, he could only truly heal by becoming a father as well. People also say that n°31 had to stay just a number, because who could match up with Barney Stinson? First of all, I call BULSHIT on that last point, because Robin wasn't the only girl Barney could have ended up marrying. I used to think that too, but it's just not true: that is the equivalent of saying that Barney was incapable to truly love a woman and commit to her, even after all the development he got, and that he only got one shot at love in life, and that's it. This goes against the point the showrunners try to make by having Ted and Robin end up together AND by having Tracy get with Ted in the first place: "it's never too late, you always have another chance at love, etc." And, let's face it, Barney and Robin are legendary, but Barney and Nora (hell, even Barney and Quinn!) were pretty good together too. 

Second of all, if they wanted to give Barney a kid, they could have easily done that, before Barney married Robin. Barney's "redemption" starts when he gets with Robin the first time, hell maybe even when we meet James for the first time: Nora, Quinn, finding out who his father is, the episode dedicated to the lies his mum told him/finding James' father, him getting to know his own dad, etc... those are all steps along the way. The s9 episode where Barney accepts the relationship between Loretta and the reverend proves how far he's come. So why not give him a daughter BEFORE he proposes to Robin? Have him cheat on Nora/Quinn with n°31, giving him a relapse, and having him get closer to Robin while struggling to be a dad to Ellie. That would have been great. 

Or, you know, don't give him children. What's the point of burning the Playbook if you're going to have him write the second edition? What's the point of having him do a complete 180 in the last few scenes and acting like having a kid is the only thing that makes him change? What's the point of doing that when the show spends entire episodes berating Marshall and Lily for "changing too much" when they have a kid?

Also, Barney is the "challenge accepted" guy. He loves his wife so much, he spent years wanting her, and then he gives up because there is no WiFi in his hotel. How does that make any sense at all? This is Barney Stinson, the "I will fly out to San Francisco and buy Lily a plane ticket", the "I will steal every girl from my best friend just to save him for Lily", the guy that wrote the Playbook (it takes effort to pull those plays off), the guy that planned for weeks his proposal, the guy that waited years to get back at the man who stole his first girlfriend, the guy that makes every night legendary... are you telling me that that guy becomes the equivalent of a bored housewife instead of living his best life while travelling the world? Come on. They don't even try to make it believable.

Ted

While watching seasons 7 and 8, I felt that Ted was becoming the worst character on the show: he was boring, depressed, basically had no good storylines, the whole thing with Victoria was pointless and inconclusive (and the whole "stop being in love with Robin" was completely out of character for her), but whatever, we could have accepted that because it passed the message that two people could be good together, without being soulmates - which, by the way, renders the TedxRobin ship pointless, because they were right for each other, but Ted and Tracy were soulmates. Him being hung up on Robin in the latter seasons is almost pathetic, and the thing he does with the locket is insane, not romantic - BUT I will say this: it can be seen in two ways, depending on who's watching. I personally like the two as friends, so I see the whole thing as a "Dahmer" situation, but I get the people who see it as a "Dobler" one and see what he did as a grand romantic gesture. 

The problem, though, is that the whole TedxRobin ship gets pretty old, pretty fast: it's an annoying on-and-off thing, that should have ended with the locket. Because, yes, Ted was in a dark moment, yes, he was probably depressed, yes, he thought Robin was his only shot at happiness, but he changes during season nine! He spends entire episodes letting go of Robin, including the one where she transforms into a balloon and flies away. Ted is the good guy, ultimately. He is the guy that is genuinely happy for his best friends. In one of the deleted scenes from the finale, he meets Robin years later and says that he's so happy with Tracy he never thought about Robin in that way anymore. All of that gets thrown in the trash. Why do that? To use a Harry Potter metaphor, Ted is Severus Snape, while Barney is James Potter: the former loved the girl of his dreams with all his heart, even to the point of creepiness, but they weren't meant to be together. 

Robin

This, along with the next point, is the worst of all: Robin is the worst character of the entire finale. Her relationship with Ted in season 2 is wonderful, and I say that as a full-on Barney/Robin shipper. There was never a problem in their relationship, apparently, but they then break up because they have an "expiration date" and ultimately want different things in life. Except that Ted is not her soulmate. The only times when Robin wants Ted are the times where (1) she can't have him because he's either trying to move on or (2) the times where it's convenient, for example when they become roommates again and they solve their disputes again. Around that time, we see perfectly that Ted had moved on and that the person getting hurt was Barney. It's one thing to see Ted and Robin in the finale as two people picking up where they had left off after they dated. But this is not the case. 

In season 7, we have the exchange that should have put an end to any and all TedxRobin drama, and that completely invalidates whatever the writers wrote after that about the two of them: Ted declares his love - "I think you know how you feel about me now. I don't think time's gonna change that. Just tell me: do you love me?" To which she answers "No". And Ted also says later to Marshall, that he's "happy because he can finally move on". 

What a load of crap. 

Getting over someone is hard, believe me, I would know. And, oftentimes, it doesn't happen until we find someone else to love (and from the moment he meets Tracy, there is no one else for Ted). But by giving Ted feelings for Robin after this moment, it takes away from the beauty of it- because it's one of the most heartbreaking feelings in the world when you declare your love to someone and they don't love you back. Ted and Robin were both honest at that moment, and it was the last genuinely good exchange between them. After that, during season 8 they try to show us Ted trying to get over her (and failing) and in season 9 Ted getting over her completely. This is also weirdly paced because at the beginning of s8 both are in happy relationships with other people and there's no jealousy (which is good, because at least they weren't toxic) and they seem just friends (when Robin leaves Nick to go see him in the middle of the night, she implies that she would do it for any of her friends), but after Ted breaks up with Veronica because of Robin everything is weirdly coated in this sort of tension between the two: first Ted loves her, but she doesn't, so when he helps her by taking her to Barney's proposal ("which means my best bro in the world has given me his blessing"). 

And, by the way, every time they try to paint Ted as the guy that comes through for Robin after this moment, they dumb down Barney's character. And still fail to make Ted a better guy than him (see: the carousel in Central Park). 

Yes, Robin and Ted have some chemistry, but it is nothing compared to what Robin and Barney have. Every time Robin is jealous of Barney, it doesn't seem like a stupid whim, just because some other child is playing with her toys (except, perhaps, during The Robin). Robin and Barney's relationship would need a whole other post, and the next time I rewatch the series I will write down all the things that make them perfect for each other, but, to me, the biggest difference between the two relationships is this: in season 6, when she's not dating either one of them, Ted accuses Robin of never making him feel needed while they were together, whereas Barney praises her for it. Those are elective affinities: that's what Barney and Robin have, and what Tracy and Ted have. 

Barney and Robin have more or less the same arc: they both get over their fear of commitment and they do that with each other. Time and time again, we are told that if they're ever going to settle down, it would only be with the other. The first time they break up is honestly so stupid, and even when they are broken up, they are the best of friends, which also makes Robin's behaviour in the finale look so stupid. The way the two of them fit together is unparalleled, both in a romantic and a platonic way. 

Think about it: Robin makes Barney a better man, while she makes Ted a worse one. 

Also, the whole point that there are different seasons in life for everything gets thrown out the window: apparently, Ted and Robin (that were a couple that ultimately worked in their young twenties) are the same people in their forties.

But that's not even the worst part. The worst part is that the two final episodes butcher Robin's arc as well: episode 23 starts with Lily saying "I want this girl to be in our lives" and we know Robin never made other friends outside of the gang, because she didn't need to, and now she walks away from everything because of fucking Ted?? This is saying "hey, Robin was only in the group for Ted, who brought her in, and now she leaves because he's not her puppy anymore". Robin was the one that was eternally indecisive between Ted and Barney and you're telling me that three years and many many life experiences later, she's still not sure? 

The point of her story is learning how to get over her fear of commitment, learning how to be there for her friends (there's an entire episode dedicated to that, and it's the one where Lily's pregnant and we meet Robin's ex-best friend in Canada), and how to balance her job and her life. Also, the way her character is treated is un-feminist and un-progressive: she becomes Ted's consolation prize. She is passive throughout s9. She cannot, ultimately, win the modern-day struggle most women have and balance out career and love life, so her true life, her "happy chapter" begins after she has already accomplished everything she wanted to and she's free for Ted. She doesn't even go back to him, she just the prize the main character wanted for all his life and only got in the end because his wife died (ONE SCENE, people, ONE SCENE!). Also, this makes Tracy the "broodmare" that gives him the kids he wanted, and his "happy family" experience before he goes to be with his one true love. 

The mother

This. This makes me so mad. One whole season spent on building up Tracy's character, just for it to go to waste. It would have been so easy to screw her up, but she is hands down the best thing about s9. She's the perfect woman for Ted and the episode shot through her perspective is the sweetest. By the end, I liked her more than Robin and Lily. She was the perfect addition to their group, she fit together with them in a perfect way, and they show us the biggest moment of her and Ted's life... for what? To have her die in a few sentences? And I don't care if they shot a funeral scene, I don't care if the finale was supposed to be 40 minutes long, because, in the end, it wasn't. The scene where Ted meets her is the second most beautiful one (after Barney's proposal to Robin) and the climax of the whole show, but they ruin her... and for what? The chemistry Ted has with her, he has with no one. The joy she brings him, the way she understands him, is unlike any other. I am sure that one of the reasons they killed her off was the shock value and I hate it. 

I cannot stress this enough: Tracy makes Ted a better person. When he's with Robin, Ted is "the nice guy" in the most selfish and narcissistic version of the trope. When he's with Tracy, love comes easy to Ted. Also, the scenes between the two of them are arguably the best Ted scenes of the show.

The kids' reactions (ugh)

It's not really what they say- it's the way they say it. The end of HIMYM was not supposed to be funny, even though the show is a sitcom. It was supposed to be bittersweet and beautiful, because it's the end of an era, and the writers must have known that. So, Ted finishes telling his story, reveals to the audience that their now-beloved Tracy is dead, and the reaction is: "No, ahah, you totally have the hots for Aunt Robin" (their words, not mine). Like, what the actual fuck? I cringed when Penny said that. It's tasteless and not fun at all. Even if it has been six years... It's still your fucking mum, show a little bit of sadness at the thought of her. 

The reason the show ended this way

What makes me especially mad is that I know for a fact that the reason they went with this ending is that it was the original one, always intended for the show, from season 2 onwards. And, if you watch it right after s2, it makes sense. But if you consider the eight years that passed and the massive character development, then no, it's not the best possible one. So many things hadn't been decided yet back in s2, especially about Barney, Ted, and Robin, and I hate that they didn't dare to scrap their work. This ending probably had sentimental meaning to the writers, but authors have to do what's best for their characters, not themselves. It's like with GoT, in a way: I think that the authors were all too aware of the impact of HIMYM and didn't believe that their finale would live up to the expectations... which compelled them to make the worst decision possible?? Every single character is OOC during the episode. Oh, and Marshall and Lily moving in the last episode is a ripoff from Friends (or maybe a tribute? Idk). Anyway, I believe that the authors were too attached to their sentimental version of "what should have been" and didn't give the characters the endings they truly deserved.

"Life works this way" // "Life only moves forward"

Some people say that the show is realistic because that's how life works. But I call super-BS on that. That might be true, and yes, people do get sick and die (Max, Marshall's dad...) and life does go on. But then, you don't frame it the way they did. It's just bad storytelling if you do it like that. And the problem is not the structure of season 9, because the characters develop in that season. The problem isn't even the mother's death. The problem is Ted ending up with Robin because that's not life moving forward for him, that's him, doing the same thing he did in 2005, 25 (twenty-fucking-five) years before! 

In conclusion, this finale is incoherent and inconclusive, and not satisfying at all. The only character that gets a good ending is Marshall: why is that? What makes his ending great? It's the fact that his character arc is respected and he finally gets what he's been working towards for more than ten years.

[mandoalorian]

Agent whisky (Teacher) x New agent (student). As you’re both fighting, you both get hot and bothered and reader throws him against a wall and the rest in folds. (Fem reader)

After Class [Jack Daniels x Reader] SMUT

Word count: 2.4k

Rating: 18+

Warnings: SMUT, p in v, creampie, choking, teacher x student, exhibitionist kink, implied age difference

Masterlist

He was insufferable. He was your teacher — and oh, you hated him. You hated how he'd come into class smelling like sweet, honeyed cologne, causing all the girls to swoon at the mere sight of him. It was laughable, really. He wasn't anything special. He was attractive, sure. He had the charm of a king and the politeness of a saint. But it didn't matter because you hated him, and you wanted him to know that you hated him. So you'd talk during his lectures and you'd roll your eyes whenever he tried addressing you directly. He had this know-it-all attitude, he had these deep, chocolate brown eyes that were so easy to get lost in. The Statesman Academy shouldn't have even hired him. It was so easy to get lost in those damn eyes.

His eyes were just a few shades darker than his hair, which he kept hidden under a cringe-worthy cowboy hat. But you'd be lying to yourself if you said you hadn't dreamt of wearing it while you ride him. The dirty fantasies about Mr Daniels (though he'd have you call him 'sir') didn't become regular until a few months ago. Now it was every single class where you became hypnotised by his attractive looks.

You hated his perfectly groomed mustache and how the thought of it brushing against your cunt haunted you during his seminars. You hated the perfect curve in his nose and how you imagined it nudging against your clit as he performed the most life changing oral on you. If only he knew about the things that went on in that filthy little mind of yours.

You practically gasped out loud when Mr Daniels dropped your assignment on the desk in front of you, a circle with a big red 'F' marked on. He quirked an inquisitive eyebrow at you, before moving on to hand out the rest of the essays. No way— there was no way that your essay has been marked fairly. You might have been slacking just a little this semester (due to Mr Daniels obnoxious handsome looks), but not to the extent of getting an F in your finals!

"Well done class, we all performed exceptionally well this term. There is however one person I need to see after class, she knows who she is," Mr Daniels glanced briefly at you and you narrowed your eyes, folding your arms over your chest. "But have an excellent vacation and remember don't party too hard." He winked cheekily before dismissing the class. Once the students filed out of the room, and the bell rang, signifying the end of the day, Mr Daniels stalked back into the classroom. He said nothing, didn't even spare you a look. He padded over to his desk, sunk into his chair and began to go through paperwork.

You waited for something— anything. The silence was deafening, and you began to tap your feet against the floor impatiently. Why the hell was he holding you hostage in his stuffy classroom on the last day of term? You assumed it was due to your abysmal grade on your essay, but he hadn't even mentioned it. He was ignoring you and once again, you hated him for it.

You were staring him out with absolutely no shame, taking in all his features. You admired his broad shoulders and watched his bicep flex as he wrote comments on the work he was checking through.

He'd noticed your staring too. He always had. He tried to contain the blush that crept up on his cheeks as your eyes burned into his body, watching his every move. You could cut the sexual tension with a knife. If he was going to speak to you about your essay result, he'd need to have a drink first. After a few more minutes of silence, he excused himself and left the classroom. Each professor at the academy had their own affinity for alcohol, Mr Daniels' beverage of choice being a glass of warm whiskey. He poured it into a small tumbler, admiring the amber liquid as he dropped a few cubes of ice in, letting it clink against the glass. The mere thought of you in his classroom, waiting for you, was enough to make his cock stir. He sighed, gulping down the liquid and made his way back to the classroom. It was the first time you and Mr Daniels had some one on one alone time. He hadn't drank enough to get intoxicated, but it was enough for him to lower his inhibitions.

He walked into the classroom and locked the door behind him, before turning to face you.

"Why am I here?" you asked with an unamused frown.

"You went from being a straight A student to getting an F in your most important exam of the year," Mr Daniels huffed with a disappointed shake of his head. You didn't care— no, you couldn't let yourself care about your professor. But seeing the despondency written across his face was enough to make your heart yearn with guilt for letting him down. "What happened?" he quizzed you eventually.

You considered his question. You weren't a dishonest person, and you knew exactly what had happened. You had been so distracted by your professor's ravenous demeanor, that you'd become too overcome with sexual desire to even focus the slightest in his lectures.

"You happened." you said, regretting the words as soon as they left your lips. Your voice broke slightly— you sounded pathetic.

"Excuse me?" he asked, raising both of his eyebrows in disingenuous surprise. You wanted to wipe the smirk that you saw creeping up on his lips. Your education wasn't a joke.

"I was doing fine in Agent Tequila's class," you acknowledged. "Maybe it's your teaching." you shrugged.

"My teaching?" Mr Daniels gasped incredulously.

"Oh quit playing dumb," you said, suddenly rising to your feet. Your chair scraped against the floor as you stalked over to your teacher. "I know my worth Mr Daniels, and it's not an F."

"Please, call me Jack." He hummed, reaching out and caressing your cheek. You subconsciously leaned into his smooth hand as his thumb rubbed gentle circles into your jaw. You hadn't even realised how close he had gotten to you as he admired your face, and the intimacy began to take effect down below.

"Oh, first name basis?" you spat sarcastically, pressing the palm of your hand against his chest, threading your fingers through the buttons of his white shirt so you could gently graze the skin of his tan chest. "How polite."

"Manners maketh man," he smirked, quoting the Statesman mantra, and you wanted to wack that dumb cowboy hat off his head. "Let me translate that for you," he pouted condescendingly, letting his hands fall to your own chest.

He squeezed your tits through your blouse, drawing a few wanton moans from you. "Wh- what makes you think I need that translated?" you asked your professor, trying to keep your cool. This is exactly what you had dreamt about for the past three months. His thumb rolled over your hardening nipples, pinching them now and again so he could watch you squirm underneath his touch.

"The F on your paper?" he shot back. Your eyes widened and you pushed him into the wall, his back slamming against the concrete as he groaned from the pressure you'd placed on him. He would be lying if he said it didn't feel good though. It was rare he'd have a lady take charge — especially not one as young and bright eyed as yourself.

"I hate you," you snarled as his fingers dipped under the hem of your short, pleated skirt. He chuckled darkly, sending a frenzy of butterflies erupting in your stomach.

"Oh sugar," he drawled, the smell of scotch lacing his breath as he pressed a soft kiss into your jaw. You couldn't contain the small whimper that escaped your lips. He smirked, knowing exactly what he could do to you— how he could make you feel. "Look at you… got me pressed against the wall. I'm your teacher." he reminded you with a small tut.

"You drive me crazy," you admitted in a fluster, your hand falling down his button up shirt and resting at his oversized belt buckle. The coolness of the metal stung your skin as you parted your legs slightly, rubbing what you could on his jean clad thigh. "When you stand up there, in front of the class, talking all that shit about, about-" you couldn't even get your words out as his fingers graced your cunt, feeling out your clit under the material of your dampening panties.

"What?" Jack murmured, his teeth grazing your jaw as he sucked softly against your skin. "What is it?" he urged you to continue, your breathing jumping as he continued to softly press his thick fingers along your aching core. You tried to answer but nothing except lewd moan came out, and you felt your cheeks heat up with embarrassment. "You joined the academy. You wanted to train as an agent. Maybe you'd prefer it if I transferred your classes to, let's say, Agent Champ? Or the sweet Ginger Ale?"

You curled your fingers around his leather belt. "N-no," you growled. "I want you," you revealed as you unclipped it and tossed it to one side. You groaned wantonly as you felt his erection press up against your thigh. It was clear that your professor wanted you too. "You know if- if Principal Champ finds out about this…" you moaned, working your fingers at Jack's zipper.

"He's not going to find out about this," Jack snapped, his harsh tone causing your eyes to snap open.

"O-okay cowboy," you bit your lip seductively, finally pulling his zipper down and freeing his hard, aching cock. You immediately wrapped your hand around him, smearing his precum down his length and started to pump at his erection, satisfied with the string of curses falling from his tongue.

"Fuck- so good," Jack praised as you worked his cock with your hands. "But I want more… I want to bury my cock in the warmth of your pussy. Would you like that baby girl?" he hummed, both his hands grabbing on your shoulders as he turned around and pushed you into the wall. You gasped as he ripped open your blouse in one swift manouver, the buttons popping and falling everywhere. His hungry lips pressed against yours as he slid his tongue into your mouth, kissing you roughly and with passion.

"Someone could just walk in." you gasped as Jack yanked your skirt down, letting it pool around your ankles.

He groaned longingly as he played with the waistband of your panties. "Lace? For school? I knew you were a dirty girl." he chuckled darkly before pulling them down. He wasted no time, pressed two fingers into your weeping cunt and rubbing between your folds. He stroked tight and precise circles into your clit, desperate to pump an orgasm out of you before he even entered. Your eyes snapped shut as you pressed your fingernails into his still clothed back. "Oh, you like that don't you?"

"Mm don't stop," you begged, rolling your hips against his fingers.

"Is this what you think about during my lectures?" Jack cooed. "Or do you imagine my cock?" He pressed his blunt tip against the inside of your thigh, pushing himself in between your legs. "So fucking wet and all for me." your professor shook his head in slight awe. You pushed the hat off his head and tangled your fingers in his dark brown hair, tugging teasingly in attempt to gain a reaction out of him.

Without warning, two of his fingers pushed inside of you and began to scissor you open. "If you want my cock I gotta make sure you're able to take it," he whispered huskily.

His fingers worked like magic and it wasn't long before your walls tightened around him and you reached your climax. "Greedy pussy." Jack sighed, removing his fingers and sucking them clean.

"Please sir, fuck me," you begged, your hands cupping his face as he lined himself up with your entrance.

"I told you, call me Jack," he growled before pushing himself deep into your quivering hole.

"Fuck Jack," you whined once he was fully seated. He was bigger than you had ever taken before, and he set a brutal pace. The classroom filled with obscene wet sounds as every single thrust became harder and sloppier as his balls slapped against your dripping cunt.

Jack kept up his pace, not halting once. "You always- you always fucking answer back," he whispered, digging one hand into your hip and bringing the other to your neck, squeezing it just enough for your eyes to widen slightly.

"Mm you always give me a reason too," you shot back and Jack's grip around you tightened as he fucked you senselessly.

"Shit, gonna cum. Gonna cum inside you and you're going to take it— understood?" he asked breathlessly. You nodded in affirmation and it only took a few more messy thrusts before he spilled his salty seed inside you.

He carefully sat you down on the edge of his desk as you came down from your own high. "Are you okay?" he asked you as he tucked himself back in his pants and adjusted his tie.

"That better have earned me an A," you muttered, biting your lip and shooting a seductive glance towards your teacher.

"Fair is fair," Jack shrugged. "You can leave when you're ready. Have a nice vacation." he smiled, back to his usual polite professor self. It made you sick— the way he could just fuck you with no remorse against the wall of his classroom and then pretend like nothing happened.

You stood up, taking your clothes from the ground and lazily sliding back into your skirt. "I don't have a fucking blouse," you mumbled, your eyes following the abundance of buttons that trailed across the floor. "You ruined it."

Mr Daniels took his suit jacket and wrapped it around your naked torso, buttoning it up gently so you were all covered up. "Do you need a lift home?" he asked.

You bit your lip, remembering your parents weren't home and smiled. "Actually, yeah please." you told him, wondering if he'd be interested in a round two.

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[weasel-b33]

500 Miles (j.p x fem!reader)

Description: A few years after the birth of your son Harry, you and your husband James recall the beginning of your relationship. (NO VOLDY I CAN NOT DO THAT TO MYSELF) 

Warnings: Fluff, Kissing, A little Swearing, idk Cute Daddy James, Prolly many spelling errors I wrote this late and I am very tired...

 (THIS IS MY FIRST TIME EVER WRITING SOMETHING KINDA SIRIUS hehe SO IM SORRY IF IT IS TERRIBLE) 

Also the dates may be a bit wrong so im sorry in advance!! 

italicized is flashback!! 

Lyrics used in the song are from “I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles)” by The Proclaimers (I KNOW THE SONG CAME OUT IN ‘87 BUT SUSPEND YOUR DISBELIEF PLEASE)

(not my gif)

The rambunctious laughter of the four year-old toddler and his father echoed throughout the large estate.

“Daddy!” exclaimed the messy haired Harry, “Can I please have a story.” Heavily emphasizing the puppy dog eyes he learned from his godfather, Sirius, a few years prior.

James Potter, the man unable to say no to anyone, tried to recall a story he had not told his son. Thinking back to the fairy tales of a prince slaying a fictional dragon, even though they are very much real, to save the princess that his mother used to tell him, James realized he was all out of good material. 

“I’m sorry bubs, I have nothing new too share,” the bespectacled man added lamely. The disappointment was instant on the child’s face, but luckily before the waterworks began, Y/N Potter strolled through the foyer into the den.

“Mommy!” Harry exclaimed, jumping up and bonding over to his mother, nearly knocking her over with his brute strength.

“Umph- Where’s the fire lovey?” you questioned with a slight chuckle. The dramatics of your son were never a surprise. Between his father and Sirius, you were surprised he had not acted much worse. Walking, more like sliding due to the child gripping your calves, over to your husband and lightly pecking his lips you ask, 

“What’s wrong now?”

Rubbing the back of his neck, he sheepishly stated, “I sorta don’t have a new story to tell him... he’s a bit peeved, if you couldn’t tell.”

A loud laugh tore through your throat as you pet your son’s hair affectionately.

“Come off Harry, Mommy has a perfect story to tell you,” you crooned softly.

“You do?”Harry questioned, rubbing the tears out of his stunning green eyes.

You picked him up and sat down near James, “Yes poppet, I have a very interesting story about how two very special people fell in love.” 

James quickly turned his head and quirked a questioning brow, “It all started when they were 15...” 

November 7, 1975

Quietly sitting on the vermilion couch of the Gryffindor Common Room, you began to fade out the noise of Lily ranting about the recent History of Magic exam, and Marlene’s long monologue over if she should or should not cut bangs. Instead, you were beginning to rip out each and every one of the hairs on your head because your Potions essay was nearly finished, yet you could not get those final words to conclude it all. 

Across the common room, a rowdy group of teenage boys, better known as the Marauders, were planning the newest prank on Snape. 

"We should give him that shampoo that will change his hair pink,” Sirius added.

Remus shook his head disapprovingly, “Pads, we did that last time come on..”

“WE HAVE NOTHING! WHAT IS WRONG WITH US, MOONY, HELP I’M DYING OF NO CREATIVITY!” Sirius exclaimed throwing himself across the scarred boy.

Although, many people turned their attention to the dark haired pureblood, James seemed he could not take his eyes off the girl nearly burning holes into her parchment, the girl he has fancied since he was 12. 

While playing with the snitch he stole, he said, “What if we tried that new rain spell we learned in charms today?” 

“Too difficult, we have not had enough practice.” Remus dismissed. “Well what if I found someone to practice on?” James added quickly turning to face his werewolf best friend. 

“Sure... Whatever, I could care less- Pads, get the bloody hell of me before I kick your arse,” 

“I’D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY REMUS JOHN,” Sirius yelled beginning his quick climb up the stairs to the boys dorm, with Remus and Peter quickly following.

“You comin’ Prongs?” Remus asked to the brunette still staring at the girl with shaky hands.

“No, I’ll come up in a few, still want to try to figure this prank out...” he said quietly. The lanky boy followed his best friends line of sight and quietly smirked to himself.

“Alright, don’t wear yourself out too much.” 

Even throughout the commotion, you still made no move to change your line of sight. That was until Marlene nudged you and whispered into your ear.

“Psst! Oi! Y/N! Why is Potter staring at you?” 

You quickly shook your head and waved off her question, opting to continue to find the right words.

Well until your blonde friend gripped your jaw, and turned your head to the direction of the boy. You instantly made eye-contact with the messy haired Gryffindor and quirked a brow. He smirked and turned his head away. You thought nothing of the interaction, until you felt a sudden drop above your head...

Instantly, it seemed as though there was a storm in the common room. Looking towards the ceiling you saw the dark rain cloud above your head. Quickly turning your head to the essay you were writing you noticed it completely wet and ruined. You jumped into action, trying to salvage what you could, but it was too late. Ignoring the screeches of your friends and fellow housemates, you began to look for the source of the cloud.

That was until you made eye contact with the laughing and smug James Potter.

“POTTER!” you yelled. Almost immediately the rain stopped, but the damage had been done. “JAMES POTTER! YOU BETTER HAVE A REASON YOU STARTED A STORM IN THE COMMON ROOM!” 

Hearing the commotion, the rest of the Marauders came down to the common room to witness what was happening. But all they saw was a yelling match between you and their brunette best friend.

“YOU ARE A DICK JAMES POTTER! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS COMING! IT’S GONNA BE SO NICE TO SEE YOUR FACE WHEN ALL YOUR ACTIONS FINALLY COME TO KICK YOU IN THE ARSE!” you yelled.

“What? I did nothing, I don’t mean to dampen your mood, but I have no idea what you are on about.” James replies smugly.

“UGH- YOU ARE A BULLY AND A RIGHTEOUS, STUCK UP, EGOTISTICAL ARSEHOLE! I HOPE YOU ARE ENJOYING THIS BECAUSE-- OH MY! I-” You were quickly being dragged away by your red head companion. 

“Y/N, he is not worth it... let’s just leave.” 

“NO! I HAVE TO RESTART MY ESSAY! I WAS THIS BLOODY CLOSE. UGH- YOU ARE AN ARSE JAMES POTTER I HOPE YOU KNOW THAT!”

“Y/N, it was just a prank, its no big deal relax.” James said.

“RELAX! ARE YOU KIDDING... I-” you paused taking shallow and rapid breaths, ‘you know I can not believe you think its funny. You truly have no regard for people and how they feel do you?” you asked slowly and meticulously. 

“Prongs, just apologize and lets go..” Remus said quickly.

“I- I didn’t realize it would be that big of a deal.” James tried to say to you, but it was no use because you had already dragged Lily and Marlene out the common room and to the library to re-start your assignment. 

“Oh, COME ON! I did not” James stated jokingly.

“Darling, you must certainly did, I barley passed that essay as well. I blame you for me getting an E in that class.” You replied giggling.

“Moooommmyyy! Story, get back to the story,” Your son said dramatically, grabbing your cheeks and turning to face him for extra effect.

Hearing a chuckling from James in the background, “Alright bubs, back to the the story”

January 23, 1976

After months of back and forth between you and James, he was fed up trying to get your attention. From roses to chocolate, to even a firework show in your honor, James believed he had done everything to apologize to you for his stupid prank and prove his affection.

Tired of his friends constant whining, Remus and Sirius decided to take matters into their own hands and talk to someone who knew you better than anyone else, Lily and Marlene.

“Oh Evans, Mckinnon, we are in grave need of your beautiful minds” Sirius flirted. Remus smacked him across the head adding, “Ignore the git, we need some help its about-”

“James?” Lily and Marlene said in unison.

“Yeah...how did you know” Remus questioned. “Are we gonna ignore the fact they spoke at the same time” Sirius said, once again receiving a blow from his friend.

Rolling her eyes, Lily remarked, “Well, Y/N has been complaining about him for months,” Marlene quickly interjected, “...and you never are without him so its an easy assumption. 

Now its was the boys turn to roll their eyes to the back of their heads. “Anyways, he will not shut up about getting her to forgive him... so we were wondering if you had anything that could work to get her to forgive him?” Remus pleaded with the best Sirius puppy dog eyes he could muster.

“Fine,” Lily and Marlene said jointly.

“THEY DID IT AGAI- OH NOT YOU TOO AS WELL!” Sirius exclaimed rubbing the now sore bump on his head. 

Ignoring the dog’s dramatics, the group of four began conducting a plan for James that would knock Y/N’s socks off.

At this point, Harry had nestled between his parents and fell into a deep sleep.

The two of you put him to bed and settle down back into the living room.

Looking longingly at his wife, James says, “Well, might as well finish the story love... it is the best part.”

Giggling at the antics of your husband, you shrug and began to finish the story...

February 14, 1976 

The Great Hall looked as though Cupid had just went on a decorating rampage. The room lined with pink and red hearts and the sight of loving couples nearly made you want to gag. Then, you remembered the boy who has dying to get your attention for the past months and can not seem but to get excited.

What does he have planned for you? Is he gonna get me a gift? Do I look presentable? 

“WHAT!” you quickly think to yourself, “Why in Merlin’s name am I excited to to see Jame- Potter. Godric I can’t feel like this for him... He his as a fly that buzzes and will not leave me alone... but he is not the worst to look at”

You quickly snap out of your thoughts as Lily starts to put food onto your plate. You begin to eat, but can only think of one thing.

James Potter.

“Why?” You begin questioning again, “Godric, Y/N You like him... No I do not.. You realize you are having this whole conversation within your brain, right? It is obvious you like him...” you grumble to yourself as you realize your psyche has won once again.

Lily noticing your strange behavior begins to question if you discovered what they have planned. 

Almost as though the boys heard Lily’s thoughts the beginning of the plan is activated.

Instantly, the candles in all of the Great Hall extinguish and there is the beginning of a song plays.

Suddenly, a spotlight shines onto the teachers table where atop, James and the rest of the Marauders stand, Remus and Sirius with guitars and Peter on the drums. James holding a mic begins to sing...

When I wake up, Well I know I’m gonna be, I’m gonna be the man who wakes up next to you.

Your head snaps to the noise and there you see in all of his glory, James Potter holding a microphone staring straight at you.

When I go out, yeah I know I'm gonna be I'm gonna be the man who goes along.

Quickly shoving the breakfast roll down your throat you nearly choke as you see the boy slowly make his way towards the front of the Gryffindor table.

When I get drunk, well I know I'm gonna be I'm gonna be the man who gets drunk next to you.

Your eyes widen comically when you see James Potter jump onto the Gryffindor table. 

And when I haver, hey I know I'm gonna be I'm gonna be the man who's havering to you.

Slowly, the boy begins his walk across the table to where you sit. You try to make a run for it, but Lily and Marlene quickly grab your arms and anchor you down to the bench 

“What friends you are!” you hiss at the two.

Marlene just rolls her eyes and Lily pinches your hip.

And I would roll 500 miles And I would roll 500 more Just to be the man who rolls a thousand miles To fall down at your door

Once the boy is standing in front of you he reaches down for your hand. Stubbornly, you ignore his gesture, well until your two friends throw you up onto the table with the love struck brunette. 

When I come home well I know I'm gonna be I'm gonna be the man who comes back home to you And when I grow old, well I know I'm gonna be I'm gonna be the man who's growing old with you.

You grip onto the boys biceps for stability and are forced to look into his ravishing hazel eyes...

In that moment you forget all that he has done to you in the past and all you can think about is him and you. 

But I would roll 500 miles And I would roll 500 more Just to be the man who roles a thousand miles To fall down at your door.

Smiling, to yourself, you grab the face of the boy in front of you and mold your lips together. Ignoring the cheers of your classmates, the only sounds you hear are the background noise of the boy’s best friends signing backup. 

Da da da  Da da da                                                                                                            Da Da Dun Diddle                                                                                            Un Diddle Un Diddle Uh Da Da.....

Smiling to yourself and grabbing the hand of the man you love you start laughing.

“What’s so funny, love?” James asks.

“Nothing.... Just we began dating because you performed a whole song and dance in front of the entirety of Hogwarts.” you reply breathlessly.

“Well, hey, look at us now... happy, healthy, and a true family.” he replies smiling at your antics.

You lay down your head into the lap of your husband, and look up into his hazel eyes you got lost into all those years ago, “Such a sap, Potter, such a sap...”

Kissing your cheek softly, “Only for you, my darling girl... only for you...” 

“I love you Jamie”

“I love you more, my love.”            ______________________________________________________________

AHHH I HOPE YOU ENJOY!!! IM SORRY IF IT IS SO BAD!! THIS IS MY FIRST FIC PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I COULD DO ANYTHING BETTER!!! AHHHH (but like kinda like this story... kinda proud ;))

[monroeville22]

-THE FURIOUS JAMES POTTER-

Hello, dear readers. I hope you’re having a pleasant day, here’s this week’s fic!

I forgot to save the third paragraph after I wrote it so I lost it all then screamed at my friend about it then wrote it again. So, thanks for putting up with me @bagelgirlwithcreamcheese i love you 💕

Sirius huffed as he looked in the mirror. He had been trying to get his eyeliner even for half an hour, probably. “Siblings, not twins. That’s it.” he murmured to himself and put the pen down on the table. The boys were going to study by the river, because the exams were coming up and Remus practically begged them to study. James had been the easiest to persuade. He cared about his notes more than Sirius and Peter. Because he actually had dreams. Sirius didn’t know the point of studying if he didn’t even have a plan. But he agreed nonetheless, it meant he would get to spend time with Remus. Peter followed, of course. He didn’t really want to fail, and he didn’t want to upset Remus.

It was a sunny day, with a warm breeze. James was wearing his Quidditch jersey, much to Sirius’ dismay. ‘That thing will make you sweat, Prongs. Take it off!’ he had protested earlier that day. But James shook his head and replied, ‘You can just say that you want to see me shirtless, darling.’ Sirius had thrown a pillow at his head and they’ve ended the conversation. After a few minutes Sirius had gotten ready, wearing a David Bowie shirt which he once stole from Remus. It was short sleeved, because it was really nice out. He was wearing his hair in a bun, held by his wand. Or maybe Remus’s wand, or James’s. He wasn’t quite sure.

“Okay, up.” Remus ordered as soon as he walked into the room. James quickly got up and smirked “Yessir.” Remus rolled his eyes as he chuckled and playfully punched his arm. Peter was still struggling with his tie. He was wearing the normal uniform. ‘We’re just going to study, why would I dress up?’ he had said to Sirius while Sirius was busy searching through his clothes. Remus made his way over to Peter and slapped his hands away. “Leave it to me Pete, I’ll help. ”

Sirius was watching Remus in awe. He had a dark green sweater on. The one Lily had bought him last Christmas. He was wearing light brown trousers. Sirius loved watching him. Remus. He had always loved the way he lead people. Not in a ‘I know everything. I am always right and you know nothing. Obey me.’ kind of way, but in a ‘I would love to help you and be there for you.’ kind of way. Remus looked at Sirius once he was done with Peter’s tie. “ What are you looking at, mister?” he asked with a teasing voice. Sirius held his stare and lifted an eyebrow. “Isn’t it obvious, Moony?” he replied. Peter stared at the two of them with a bored look. “Okay, I’m leaving. You two can continue whatever this-” he waved his hands, gesturing the boys, “-is.”

Remus watched Peter as he left the room. He turned his head towards Sirius once the blonde boy was gone. He smiled at him and walked over to his bed. Well, it was also Sirius’s bed, they shared it. He sat on the bed and kept staring at Sirius. “So, loverboy. Don’t you look beautiful.” he whispered. They were used to this. Whispering. They would occasionally talk in whispers so that the other boys in the dorm wouldn’t wake up. It was their thing.

Sirius laughed and threw himself next to Remus. “Don’t steal my line!” he nudged at the other boy’s shoulder. Remus laughed and pulled Sirius onto his lap and ran a hand through the pale boy’s hair. “Did you put it in the dictionary? No.” Sirius glared at him but quickly smiled at the boy. He couldn’t get mad at Remus. Not even pretend. He was just so lovely. Remus took Sirius’s hand in his own and slightly pulled on it. “Come on, we gotta go. James might think we’re doing something.” he laughed. Sirius whimpered in protest and pushed Remus onto his back which resulted in both of them falling. Remus yelped in surprise but stayed in that position. “We need to study, love. You know this.” he poked Sirius’s belly. Sirius let out a breathy laugh and poked Remus back. “Pads.” Remus warned. Sirius huffed and slowly got up. Remus put one hand up for Sirius to hold. “You little shit.” he laughed and pulled Remus up. Remus smiled innocently and threw an arm around Sirius’s shoulders. “Lead the way, darling.”

They were greeted by a grinning James Potter once they arrived at their spot. Sirius grinned back at him, which made Remus slap him in the head. “Ow!” he yelled and rubbed his head. He pushed Remus to the ground where James and Peter were sitting. Remus laughed loudly and rolled in the grass. “Oi, Lovebirds! We came here to study, save that for when you’re alone.” James pointed at Remus with his pen. Remus giggled and sat up. Sirius quickly sat next to him. James glared at the two disapprovingly but continued quizzing Peter on their Charms essay.

“He’s jealous.” Sirius whispered to Remus. “Yes, he is.” Remus replied, putting his head on top of the other boy’s. Sirius hooked their arms together and opened his book. Remus took this opportunity to start doodling hearts all over Sirius’s page. “Stop it, you bastard!” Sirius whispered, trying to hold his giggles in. Remus choked as he did the same. James threw his parchment and pen at Remus.

“REMUS YOU DRAGGED US HERE TO STUDY! YOU EITHER STUDY OR I’LL FEED YOU BOTH TO THE SQUID!”

[hwabang]

Could you possibly write a stray kids reaction to their s/o being stressed out over school?

STRAY KIDS Reaction: s/o stressed over school

A/N: My first official request on Tumblr!!! Thank you~❤️ I relate to this SO much, so yes, I can do it🥰 Ultimately I think they’d all try to alleviate the stress one way or another😇

Genre: Fluff

Requested: Yes!!

Warnings: None; just talking about school stress, but this is gn!!

————————

Bang Chan:

Chan would want to do EVERYTHING POSSIBLE to relieve you of your stress, but he doesn’t want to come off as too clingy. So I think the best solution he could come up with is first asking you to take a break and talk to him. He’d ask you what exactly about school is stressing you out, and he’ll try to help you in any way that he can. That doesn’t mean he’ll do the work for you (if he’s whipped enough he might write your essay) but he’ll definitely sit down with you and help you organize your thoughts/prioritize what’s necessary. He’d bring you snacks too~

“Okay baby cmon, let’s go take a walk and talk about what’s bothering you okay? We can come back in 10-15 minutes and I’ll help you get organized.”

Lee Know:

Minho would be more quiet and let you be. I think he’d resize you’re stressed, but he wouldn’t do much unless you straight up tell him it’s too much, or he sees you breaking down. In that case I think he’d opt for massaging your shoulders, then telling you to take a little break so you can go back to your work with a clear mind. During your break he’d probably also be one to make you a snack/meal and he’d feed it to you by hand🥺 Minho’s also a really good listener, so he’d definitely sit with you while you eat and rant (he’ll just be the listener unless you want advice)

“Ah... well I think she should’ve explained it better. Next time just email her to prevent that from happening again.”

Changbin:

I think Changbin is the type to be like “Oh let me see it? Yeah, yeah I think I can help you with it.” I don’t know much about their student lives, but Changbin strikes me as someone who was fairly good in school, so he would try to help you understand the content, if that’s what you’re struggling with in the school stress aspect. If you understand it and it’s a matter of not being motivated to do it, he’d try to motivate you because manz has a way with words

Hyunjin:

“Hey Hyunjinnie do you think you could help me with number 4-“

“AHHH! NO!”

... Uh, yeah good luck. Hyunjin isn’t helping you mostly because he doesn’t remember and/or understand because school is ✨yuck✨ and he’d rather not think about it. However, Hyunjin does understand that school is important for you because you want to do academically well to get your dream job. Jinnie cares about your mental health (like all of SKZ) so he’d prompt you to take a break. If you’re head on about finishing your assignments before taking a break, he’ll become serious and try to motivate you to the best of his ability. He’s the type to offer to sit with you and kiss you for each question you answer (correctly or not). He’d also probably lay in your lap while you type away on your computer, completely focused and seldom bringing one hand to his luscious hair while you reread what you wrote.

Han:

Again, I don’t have much idea about their school lives but I don’t think Jisung cared too much about school 💀 which probably means he won’t be as helpful in solving your math problems for you. I mean he’ll try, but you’re better off asking Google. Like Changbin, he’ll try to motivate you with his words and he’ll sit there with you till you’re done no matter how long that may be. Might even bring some fruit or cheesecake and feed you while you work (🥺)

“Hey, look at me. I know this is hard. I’m sorry I’m not much help but you can do it okay? If it’s too hard, then throw it away! It’s your teacher’s fault you don’t get it. But I want you to try your best okay? Remember I’m your #1 fan. Let’s try this again yeah? LETS GET IT WOOH!”

Felix:

“Fuck it. Let’s go make brownies!”

Felix doesn’t give a flying fuck. I mean yes, education is important but if he sees you breaking down because of a few assignments that won’t matter in 10 years, he’s going to do the one thing he knows he can do to (temporarily) distract you; making you food!

So he’d probably ask you to come bake with him do you can clear your mind, and then he’d try to coax you back into working (because he doesn’t want his baby to be sad because they didn’t do an assignment 🙃)

“Good brownies right? Well, now let’s see if you have enough energy to finish that project! I can proof read anything you want.”

Seungmin:

“Honey, why don’t I try to teach it to you? I remember learning this.”

Tutor Minnie!! Baby wants to help you with your homework as much as possible. He’d probably be able to help you a LOT which you are absolutely greatful for. He’s not doing any of the work for you; of course he wants to transfer all of your stress to him but he knows that you learning the content would be more beneficial for you than him just doing it without explaining anything. So he’d sit there for HOURS if needed, all to help you understand your school content. He’d praise you for getting things correct/learning the concept

“It’s okay, it’s not an easy concept. Let’s go get a snack and we’ll come back to it okay? I can explain it in another way.”

I.N:

Honestly at first I had no idea how he’d react

Jeongin would feel terrible. It hasn’t been long since he was sitting at his desk all day cramming for exams; he remembers all of the breakdowns and sleepless nights. He hated how it effected him and he hates seeing the same thing happening to you. So he’d probably take care of you the way he wished he took care of himself; forcing you to take at least a 5 min break every 30 min or so, making sure you’re hydrated and eating, helping you section off the content so you can focus on one topic every 30 min interval. He wouldn’t know exactly what to do but he knows that he just doesn’t want you to suffer because of school stress. So he will definitely spend a good chunk of his time getting you to relax

“You’ve been at it for 2 hours.. okay. Let’s go to the restaurant across the street. We’ll take the food to go and I can help you study while we eat”

———————————

Thank you once again for all of the requests! I’ll try my best to update multiple times a week so no one thinks I’m dead 😂

I’m sorry if this felt rushed... it’s been an interesting day 😅😅

Anon I hope you enjoyed!!

❤️❤️all the love to anyone reading this❤️❤️

[authenticcadence18]

Can’t Help Falling in Love Ch. 5

THE CHAPTER IS BACK UP, WOO!!!!! (it accidentally got deleted...but I’m finally fixing it, yay!!) Pls enjoy!! 

Warning: the next line contains a minor trigger warning which contains a minor spoiler.

(minor trigger warning for an injury in this chapter. It’s nothing serious...and mostly just in there as an excuse for some fluff...but I wanted to let y’all know just in case!)

First Chapter

Previous Chapter

AO3

...

Darling, so it goes…

Some things are meant to be…

...

“Alright! Before I let you and your partners discuss your projects for the last fifteen minutes of class, who can tell me something about dominant chords?”

Since the beginning of March, Ms. Chase had made a habit of asking her students one review question a day as a “pre-pre exam review.”

Unfortunately, the blank stares she got in response to today’s question seemed to indicate no one had a response.

Ms. Chase allowed the silence to linger for a few seconds, giving her students the opportunity to think critically about her question before determining she needed to move on. “Alright, I’ll review them again!” she said warmly. “There’s no point in waiting an eternity for someone to answer a question if no one knows the answer or wants to answer...we would just be wasting time.

“Dominant chords are built on the fifth note in a scale, and they create instability! Whenever you hear a dominant chord in a song, you instinctively wait for it to resolve. It sounds like it’s holding its breath! And, that resolution, or the exhale of relief, is typically found in a tonic chord!! Remember, the tonic chord is built on the first note of a scale, so when you go back to it, it’s like you’re going back home.”

Perhaps now that she’d reviewed the concept, the class would be able to answer a question!

“Can anyone think of a song that ends with a dominant chord resolving to the tonic?”

A student raised his hand.

“Yes, Django?”

Django’s answer was hesitant. “...‘Twinkle Twinkle Little Star’?”

“Excellent!!!” Ms. Chase replied with a grin. She wrote out the lyrics to the first verse of the tune on the whiteboard and gestured to them to elaborate on the lesson. “Imagine the words ‘what you’ being held out for an extended period of time instead of immediately being followed by the word ‘are’ and the final tonic chord....hear the unresolved dominant chord in your head…..FEEL the mounting tension that is DESPERATE to finally be resolved…...can you hear it? Can you FEEL the aching, burning desperation for resolution???”

A few particularly musically-inclined students—Isabella and Phineas included—nodded their heads enthusiastically. The majority of the class, however, seemed primarily caught off-guard by their teacher’s passion for chords (especially while discussing a children’s nursery rhyme).

Ms. Chase chuckled at their reactions (and her heart sang at the few students who DID seem to grasp the inherent beauty of dominant and tonic chords.)

“Look, I know this might seem boring and irrelevant now, but you’ll need this information to understand a simile in a couple of chapters!!”

“....don’t you mean to understand our exam review in a couple of weeks?”

“Yup! That’s what I said!!”

...

“Alright, by class time tomorrow, you and your partner need to decide whether your final project will be live, recorded, or elsewise! No matter what you decide to do, you will have to turn in your project along with your essays next Monday, exactly a week from today. You can turn in a scratch recording if you intend to do a live performance. And, just a reminder, presentations will start next week on Tuesday. Alright, you have the rest of class to discuss with your partners! Go!!!!”

Isabella and Phineas nodded at their teacher before facing one-another. Isabella opened her notebook and thumbed to a blank page, scribbling the words “Presentation Ideas” on the top.

“I’m sure glad we already got the essay out of the way!!” Phineas exclaimed as she wrote. “It was a great idea to do that first, Isabella.”

Isabella smiled sweetly (and maybe she blushed a little, but who could blame her?) and replied, “AND, just like you said, we have a better grasp on the song’s themes and structure now! That’ll make the presentation easier.”

“Easier,” of course, was a relative term for their situation. Understanding the themes and structure of their assigned song didn’t change what the lyrics meant to them personally.

Isabella and Phineas quite literally couldn’t help being in love with one another.

No amount of analysis could top that for inspiration.

“OK!!” Isabella shook her head to clear it of thoughts about her feelings for Phineas and the inherent irony in their song assignment. “Ideas for our presentation!! What do you want to do? Make a poster? Sing live? Record a video?”

(One would think two individuals as motivated and driven as Phineas and Isabella would have come to a decision about this by now. But they’d both been putting this conversation off for as long as they could.)

“Well….” Phineas rubbed the back of his neck and tried to hide the faint blush warming his face. “...I think it would be fun to sing together again. I mean, live. For the class. We haven’t done that—you know, sung together—in years.”

Deep down, Phineas knew singing with Isabella was perhaps not the best idea. Singing “Can’t Help Falling in Love” for their presentation—as opposed to making a poster or something about it—would almost CERTAINLY result in sly looks from the rest of their classmates as they performed...not to mention be difficult on Phineas himself.

But he loved singing with Isabella.

Some of his fondest memories from when they were kids involved musical numbers—be they spontaneous or rehearsed—in which they shared a melody.

Phineas also figured it would be less risky to sing live than make a video. If he and Isabella chose the latter option for their presentation, they would likely have to spend time editing footage together after recording...and Isabella could catch him gazing fondly at her in one of the videos...and his secret would be out. It would be better to just record the audio of their song once or twice for Ms. Chase and then sing it in front of the class.

And...there was one final reason Phineas wanted to sing “Can’t Help Falling in Love” with Isabella.

Doing so would be the safest way to say “I love you ” to her.

He didn’t expect her to return his feelings or even UNDERSTAND just how deeply the lyrics resonated in his heart while they sang together, of course.

But he wanted to tell her he loved her. Even if it was just through the lyrics of a half-a-century-old song. Even if it didn’t mean anything to her.

It would mean something to him.

Isabella smiled fondly as memories of singing with Phineas washed over her. “You know what? I think you’re right. That WOULD be fun. We should sing together. ...you know, live!”

(She also didn’t trust herself to film a video without making heart eyes at Phineas and potentially give her feelings away. Maybe he wouldn’t notice but...it was better to be safe than sorry.)

A bright smile unfolded over Phineas’s face, and Isabella giggled.

“It’s settled then!!” he exclaimed excitedly. “We’ll decide on some instruments to play and come up with an arrangement for the song, and then….” He gazed at her lovingly and took her hand in his. “All we’ll have to do is…run away together!!!”

Isabella beamed at him.

And then she blinked. And frowned.

Because what had Phineas said, exactly?

…and why did it feel uncomfortably familiar?

A bit of closer inspection revealed that Phineas wasn’t actually holding her hand. Or gazing at her lovingly.

...this didn’t bode well.  

Isabella took a deep breath. “......can you repeat that?” she asked hesitantly. “I think I zoned out for a second there.”

“Sure!” Phineas replied cheerfully. “I said, we’ll decide on some instruments to play and come up with an arrangement for the song, and then all we’ll have to do is record it for Ms. Chase and sing for the class!”

Isabella offered Phineas a thumbs up and a strained smile for the clarification.

On the inside, however...she was not smiling at all.

When Isabella was younger, she’d had a bad habit of occasionally falling into romantic daydreams about Phineas when he spoke to her and missing whatever he’d actually said. The rest of the Fireside Girls had lovingly dubbed this phenomenon “going to Phineasland.”

Isabella hadn’t been to Phineasland in years. Even now, though her feelings for Phineas were stronger than ever, she figured she’d outgrown it.

...except she apparently HADN’T outgrown it.

And she was going to scream.

Because if such daydreams became more frequent, Isabella had no idea how she’d be able to perform a love song with Phineas!! How was she supposed to discern between fantasy and reality while singing a romantic duet with him if she apparently couldn't even do it in regular conversation now??

...Isabella was just going to have to focus extra carefully whenever they interacted from now on. And take anything Phineas said (or sang) that could be interpreted as more than friendly with a grain of salt.

Several grains of salt.

“So. Do you want to get started on the song after school today?” Phineas asked.

“Sure!!” Isabella agreed quickly, eager to put thoughts of Phineasland out of her head and focus on literally anything else.  “I have soccer practice till 4:30, though. Do you have any meetings today? If not, I can come over to your house once I’m finished.”

“I don’t have any meetings today, but don’t mind hanging out here until you’re done!” Phineas replied. “Maybe I can sit outside on the bleachers while you and the team practice!! That way, you won’t have to walk home by yourself afterward.”

Isabella grinned, already looking forward to strolling home with Phineas (and maybe accidentally brushing her hand against his a few times as they walked).

(She could totally do that without going to Phineasland. Totally. 100%.)

“That sounds great!”  

...

Phineas smiled as a light breeze ruffled his hair.

It was a beautiful afternoon to sit outside and watch one’s crush play soccer.

It had been awhile since Phineas witnessed the soccer team in action. Their season ended back in autumn, and all their spring practices were primarily held to keep the team moving and prepare the underclassmen for next year’s season.

(Phineas hadn’t missed a game, of course. He loved supporting Isabella in any way he could...and watching her play soccer and lead the team was pretty awesome.)

His gaze gradually drifted away from the soccer field and down to the notebook in his lap. He added a bit of shading to the design for an invention he’d been ruminating on for awhile: a generator that could create any image in fireworks. Such an invention could be used for quite a few things, but Phineas had a particular idea in mind for it….

On the opposite page, he sketched out a horizon and penciled the phrase “Gitchee Gitchee Goo!” into the sky. A lopsided grin unfolded over his face as he absently doodled small hearts and sparks around the lyric.

...now that song was stuck in his head. He hummed a bit of the refrain.

Gitchee gitchee goo means that I love you!

Phineas smiled fondly at the familiar melody, one he and Isabella both knew very well. He wasn’t planning on confessing to her anytime soon...but it was still fun to daydream up different ways he could do so.

(Well. It was fun to daydream up different ways he could do so in a hypothetical scenario where confessing couldn’t result in their friendship being ruined forever. But that went without being said.)

“Hey, Phineas! Whatcha drawin’?”

Phineas’s pulse skyrocketed, and he nearly fell off the bleachers.

He’d been so wrapped up in his daydream, he didn’t realize Isabella was sitting next to him now.

And it was too late to shut the notebook. She’d already seen it.

...this didn’t bode well.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you!” Isabella said with an apologetic smile. “We’re taking a short break, so I wanted to see what you were up to.” She moved a bit closer to Phineas so she could admire his handiwork better. “Oooooh, that looks neat!! Is that a generator that makes custom fireworks?”

Phineas managed to nod, hoping his face didn’t look as red as it felt.

Isabella smiled as she read the familiar lyric scrawled in the paper sky. “Are you planning to use this to promote some sort of Phineas and the Ferbtones comeback concert?”

Some of the tension left Phineas’s shoulders.

Isabella had provided a perfect explanation for the fireworks he’d drawn!!

“YUP!!!” he replied quickly. “I’d use it to promote a comeback concert!! Or, well, a comeback-comeback concert, I guess. But probably not anytime soon. I’m in no rush to revisit being a one-hit wonder...there’s too much other stuff going on right now. But I bet it could be fun to do someday!”

“Well, whenever you schedule that concert, let me know! Being a Ferbette was tons of fun.” Isabella smiled and quietly sang a bit of the aforementioned one-hit wonder to herself. “Gitchee gitchee goo means that I love you!”

Phineas let out an inaudible sigh of relief (and tried to ignore the way his heart leapt to hear Isabella sing the words ‘ I love you ’ in his general vicinity).

THAT had been a close one.

“Isabella, Isabella!!!”

A younger soccer player—perhaps a sophomore—ran over to the bleachers, an excited smile plastered to her face and blond hair flying behind her.

“What’s up, Mel?” Isabella asked. “We’ve still got a few minutes before we start the next drill. Is everything okay?”

“Is this—" Mel paused to catch her breath (running across the soccer field in one go was no easy feat!) before starting again. “Is this who I think it is??” She gestured to Phineas excitedly.  

Isabella smiled proudly. “It sure is!!

“Phineas, meet Mel, soccer-extraodrinare! And Mel, meet Phineas!!! He and I are working on a project for a class together, so he’s hanging out here until the end of practice.”

“It’s nice to meet you!” Phineas said kindly, extending a hand towards Mel. “I’ve seen you play before: you’ve got great form!!”

Mel, in response, squealed elatedly.

Which kind of freaked Phineas out.

Isabella couldn’t help but laugh at his confused expression. “Your reputation precedes you,” she explained with a grin.

“You built a Football X7 stadium in your backyard when you were just a kid!!!!” Mel elaborated. “Isabella told us all about it last semester!!!”

“Well, TECHNICALLY, my brother, Isabella, and the rest of our friends also built the stadium,” Phineas replied with a smile. “It was a team effort!”

Football X7 was once a purely hypothetical concept. In the 1950s, a man named Professor Ross Eforp developed plans for a fully-enclosed football—or soccer, for any Americans reading—stadium in which players could run on walls and shoot goals from virtually anywhere! Unfortunately, he was never able to bring his dream into reality, and it was deemed impossible.

Fortunately, for Phineas, Ferb, and the rest of their friends, the only thing that was impossible was impossibility! They built the world’s first fully-functioning Football X7 stadium to play a match with Ferb’s cousins one summer day and gave it away to a popular football team once they were finished with it.

Mel grinned before taking a deep breath and shyly asking, “...have you ever thought about building another stadium sometime? Playing soccer on this field is great and all, but I’ve always wondered what it would be like to play Football X7. Isabella told us it was tons of fun!”

Phineas rubbed his chin thoughtfully. It had only taken a few hours to build the stadium when he and Isabella were kids, but they’d had the help of Ferb and the rest of their friends then (and no other responsibilities to tend to, since it had been the middle of summer). “Well, I don’t see why not!” he said. “That would be really cool! But, we might need some extra hands to build it quickly.”

Isabella’s eyes lit up. “Why not recruit the robotics club to help?” she suggested excitedly. “We could all work together to build it!! With so many people lending a hand, it wouldn’t take long at all!”

“That’s a great idea!!!!” Phineas replied with a grin. “Ferb and I have been trying to think of something we could build with the robotics club for the betterment of the school, and a Football X7 stadium would be perfect!! How about I bring it up at our meeting tomorrow afternoon, make sure everyone is on board and that it’s okay with the school administrators, and then we can decide where and when to build?”

“That sounds great!!!” Isabella said.

“And, once it’s built, we can play a match together, for old time’s sake,” Phineas added.

Isabella smirked, a competitive glint emerging in her eyes. “The robotics team against the soccer team? You’re on!!!”

Mel squealed excitedly before taking off across the field, loudly exclaiming the recent development to the rest of the team. A ripple of cheers spread amongst the players as the amazing news—Phineas Flynn was going to help build them a Football X7 stadium!!—sank in.

Their shouts of joy nearly brought tears to Isabella’s eyes. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen them so happy….” she whispered.

Isabella cared deeply for the members of the soccer team. Throughout high school, in all its ups and downs, they’d always been there for her—and she’d made it a top priority to look out for the younger players (both to pay it forward to the upperclassmen who’d looked out for her when she was just a freshman and because she loved helping others, period).

To have the opportunity to give back to them like this, to see them so excited...it was amazing.

...and it wouldn’t have been possible without the brilliant, kind-hearted boy beside her.

Isabella turned to Phineas with a warm smile, gratitude momentarily overriding any qualms at expressing affection towards him, and brushed a quick kiss against his cheek.

“Thank you, Phineas.”

And then she stood from the bleachers and started jogging across the field and towards the rest of the team—both to join their celebration and finish up their practice.

Isabella didn’t fully register that she’d kissed Phineas on the cheek until she was about midway across the field. This realization made her stumble, doubts and possible ramifications of the spontaneous gesture suddenly spinning about her skull.

Had that been too much? Had she given her feelings away??

A small, slightly-jaded voice in Isabella’s head whispered, “Please, Isabella. Phineas is perhaps the most oblivious person on this planet—nay, in this GALAXY. He wouldn’t be able to figure out you have feelings for him just by you giving him a thank-you kiss on the cheek. He probably thinks it was a friendly gesture.”

The small, slightly-jaded voice was right. Sort of.

Phineas couldn’t move.

Had that really just happened? Had that been real??

The pinprick of warmth, the signature of Isabella’s kiss, still glowing faintly on his cheek seemed to indicate it had, indeed, been real.

He told himself she’d just been expressing her gratitude. That kiss did not mean—COULD NOT HAVE MEANT—anything more than “thank you.” After all, friends could kiss each other on the cheek, couldn’t they? They did that in other countries, right? Like, in France? That had to be what Isabella had intended by kissing him.

But this perfectly logical explanation couldn’t stop Phineas’s heart from racing in a perfectly illogical way. Or his face from flushing in an equally illogical way.

Because Isabella had kissed him.

Even if it had been a friendly kiss.

She’d kissed him.

A dreamy smile unfurled across Phineas’s face.

Today was a good day.  

...

The walk home was relatively uneventful.

Isabella didn’t dare “accidentally” brush her hand against Phineas’s now, not after the stunt she’d pulled during soccer. Attempted hand-holding probably would have been pushing it...even for someone as oblivious as Phineas.

And Phineas didn’t dare bring up Isabella’s kiss. But he thought about it. He couldn’t stop thinking about it.

The duo simply walked home, chatting about school and their project and ideas for the Football X7 stadium.

When they arrived at the Flynn-Fletcher household, they settled in the living room to develop a game plan for their song.

“Alright, Isabella,” Phineas began as they sat on the ground. “Are there any particular instruments you want to play when we sing?”

“I’m just not sure…” Isabella replied, pursing her lips in thought. “I’ve been thinking about it, but I can play tons of instruments! I’m not sure how to choose just one.”

“Same here!!” Phineas agreed. “There’s so many great options to choose from! Only playing a couple of guitars or something for our performance would be boring.”

“Wait…..” Isabella’s eyes lit up with inspiration for the second time that day. “....what if we didn’t HAVE to choose? Didn’t Candace used to use the spare room upstairs as a music room??”

“Yeah, but what does that have to do with….WAIT A MINUTE.”

“We can turn it into a recording studio!!!!” Isabella exclaimed excitedly. “And record our own accompaniment track with as many instruments as we want!!!!”

“Isabella, you’re a genius!!!!!!!” Phineas declared brightly.

“I know I am!” Isabella replied with a playful shrug. She opened her laptop and pulled up a music notation website. “Shall we get started on an arrangement then?”

“Yes, yes we shall!!”

...

The next few days passed by in a flurry of productivity. Isabella and Phineas divided their time between their own individual commitments, working on plans for and leading the construction of Danville High’s new Football X7 stadium, and working on arranging and recording the instrumental track for their project. Now, it was Friday, and they were headed to school to unveil the newly-completed Football X7 stadium and play the ultimate game of football—er, soccer. Ferb walked beside them, listening amusedly as they argued over who would emerge the victor in the evening’s match.

“My team’s totally going to win,” Isabella gloated. “We’re literally the SOCCER team. How could we lose a soccer match?”

“You forget, our team developed the blueprints for the stadium!!” Phineas replied matter-of-factly. “We have the technical know-how. AND, we have Ferb!!”

The two brothers exchanged a fist bump.

Isabella rolled her eyes with a grin. “Yeah, yeah, talk all you want. You’re so gonna lose.”

“No, YOU’RE gonna lose.”

“YOU ARE.”

“NO YOU.”

“I’M going to lose my appetite if you two keep flirting with each other,” Ferb chimed in.

Phineas and Isabella exchanged flabbergasted glances before shooting identical glares at him.

“FERB!!!”

“We are NOT flirting!!”

“Right!! We’re not!!!”

“That was just...friendly trash-talk!!!!”

“Yeah!!!!!!”

Ferb rolled his eyes with a smirk. “Whatever you say!” he conceded.

Phineas and Isabella eyed each other before frantically looking in opposite directions, both trying to hide their burning faces.

…..they hadn’t actually been flirting, right? Ferb was just messing with them...right??

The direction Phineas chose to look happened to line up with where Ferb stood. “....why do you hate me?” he mouthed, a steely look in his eyes.

Ferb just shrugged cheekily, pretending he didn’t understand his brother’s retort.

Someday, Phineas and Isabella would understand he did these things because he loved them.

(And because they loved each other but were really bad at figuring it out.)

...

After a rousing opening ceremony, the Football X7 match between the soccer and robotics teams was underway!!!!

(There wasn’t much room for seating within the stadium itself—the only non-athletic space inside was a small observation deck suspended in its middle—so any onlookers were allowed to sit and watch the match on a screen set up outside.)

So far, Isabella’s prediction had proven true: the soccer team had a few points on the robotics team! She grinned from her position guarding her team’s goal, eyeing the trajectory of the ball as the players kicked it around the stadium. She had a great view of the action from here, since the goals were elevated!!

Though Isabella didn’t think he’d played in years, Phineas was still pretty good at soccer. He kept up with the rest of the players easily and even managed to move the ball a few times!

(She was a better player than him, of course. That went without being said. But he was still pretty good.)

Isabella moved from foot to foot impatiently: she wanted the first period of the game to end. Playing goalie was definitely fun, but she was ready to run along the ceiling!! Kick the ball!! Really get her legs moving!!! Run next to Phineas and maybe trash-talk him some more!!!

And then, towards the bottom of the stadium, an enthusiastic member of the robotics team kicked the ball a bit too hard...and it crashed directly into Phineas’s head.

Phineas crumbled to the ground.

And Isabella didn’t need to wait for the next period to start running anymore.

“PHINEAS!!!!” Isabella leapt off the goal, sprinted down the nearest wall, and frantically ran to where Phineas lay before kneeling next to him on the ground. “Phineas, are you okay?? Can you hear me??”

Phineas groaned, but he didn’t open his eyes.  

Ferb crouched opposite Isabella at his brother’s side. “He got hit pretty hard….” he voiced quietly, an unfamiliar edge of worry in his tone.

“Oh no!!! I’m so sorry!!!!!” The aforementioned enthusiastic player took a hesitant step towards the three of them before burying his head in his hands. “It was an accident!!!”

“It’s okay, these things happen,” Isabella replied, though she wasn’t really paying attention to him.

She looked up at Ferb and said, “When I was younger, I earned a Concussion First Aid patch. Hopefully Phineas doesn’t have one...but, if he does, I can help.”

She took a shaky breath and tried to stay calm.

Phineas was going to be okay. He had to be.

She’d make sure of it.

...

Phineas blinked slowly as reality gradually returned to him. The world was a blur, and a dull pain throbbed in the back of his skull. He could only make out the green haze of the Football X7 stadium all around him, and the green haze of Ferb’s hair to his right….and Isabella. She hovered right above him. She was smiling at him.

Gosh, she was beautiful.

Isabella couldn’t hide the relieved grin that unfolded over her face as Phineas opened his eyes. “Is your head okay, Phineas?” she asked gently. “You got hit with the ball. Do you remember that?”

“I...think I remember…” Phineas managed to say. “And...my head’s fine...”

Sure, his head hurt, but he was alright. He’d never been better, actually, because Isabella was right here, gazing at him kindly and looking as pretty as ever. He smiled softly before reaching out to gently brush a strand of hair that had escaped her ponytail behind her ear.

“I’m still seeing stars, though.”

Isabella’s breath caught, and her face—already slightly pink from playing soccer for the past half hour—flushed crimson.

...had Phineas just tenderly brushed the hair from her face and said he was seeing stars while looking at her?

…..or was this another daydream?

……..it was probably a daydream.

“Now is NOT the time to go to Phineasland!!!” Isabella told herself sternly. “Phineas might need your help!!!”

She needed to be completely focused right now. Not lost in an ill-timed fantasy!!!

“Ok, I’m going to take him up to the observation deck to make sure everything’s alright!!!” Isabella announced loudly. She looked at Ferb. “I’ll take care of Phineas, you hold down the fort here.”

…why was Ferb smirking at her?

…..he could probably tell she’d been in Phineasland.

This was so embarrassing.

“Alright, Phineas! Ready to go?”

“...I think so.”

Isabella slowly helped Phineas to his feet and, together, they walked towards the elevator that led to the observation deck. She’d be able to assess any damage more thoroughly up there—and give herself time to refocus on the way up.

(She couldn’t BELIEVE she was daydreaming about Phineas at a time like this, when she needed to be level-headed for his sake. It was absurd. It was MORTIFYING.)

Phineas didn’t say anything: his head was still a little fuzzy. But he was more than glad to follow Isabella wherever she went. He’d follow her anywhere.

The remaining students exchanged apprehensive glances as Isabella and Phineas disappeared into the elevator.

“Do you think he’ll be okay?” someone asked.

“He’ll be fine,” Ferb assured them with a smile. “He’s in good hands. We can keep playing for now and check on him later.”

Another student chuckled behind her hands. “So like….are they dating or something?” she asked.

Phineas’s “seeing stars” comment—and Isabella’s reaction to it—had been hard to miss.

“Unfortunately, they are not,” Ferb replied. “But who knows? That could change soon.”

...

Phineas regained his bearings on the way up to the observation deck. He’d been a little out of it when he first woke up, but the fog in his head was finally clearing.

And here, beside Isabella in the elevator, he was having a bit of a crisis as he remembered the events of a minute ago.

“ .....did I tenderly brush the hair from Isabella’s face and say I was seeing stars while looking at her??

“….oh my gosh. I tenderly brushed the hair from Isabella’s face and said I was seeing stars while looking at her.

“. ...this is so embarrassing. ”

Maybe Isabella understood he’d been out of it. Maybe she wouldn’t ask him to explain why he’d done what he had.

…..maybe Phineas should stop thinking about this before she noticed he was blushing.

“Alright, here we are!” Isabella announced as the elevator stopped. She took Phineas’s hand (and Phineas blushed even harder) and guided him to sit in a chair near the wrap-around window overlooking the stadium. “How does your head feel now?”

“Not as bad as it did when I first woke up, I guess…” Phineas replied. “But it still hurts a little.”

“Are you nauseous?” Isabella asked.

“No.”

“Dizzy? Fatigued?”

“Not really, no.”

“Do you remember what happened right before and after you got hit?”

It took Phineas a second to think of a suitable response to that question.

“.....yes? I was running before I got hit and fell down, and then...I opened my eyes and talked to you.”

Isabella nodded, seemingly satisfied with his answer. “Okay, you probably don’t have a concussion. But if you start feeling weird tomorrow or the next day, you should probably see a doctor. Just in case.” She examined the back of his head. “You’re definitely going to have a gnarly bruise back here. Sorry about that.”

“It’s fine,” Phineas replied. “That’s a part of the game, you know?”

“Yeah, it is….” Isabella agreed, finally taking a seat beside him. “I’ve been knocked in the head with a soccer ball at LEAST three times. It builds character.” She chuckled before tilting her head at Phineas with a gentle smile and quietly voicing, “...I’m really glad you’re okay…”

“How could I not be okay?” Phineas said. He grinned. “I’ve got you to take care of me!”

Isabella rubbed the back of her neck with a shy smile. “I’m just doing my former Fireside Girl thing, that’s all!”

“...so, now that you know I’m alright, are you gonna go back down there?” Phineas asked. “I think I’m done with Football X7 for today, but you can still play!”

(He didn’t WANT Isabella to leave, of course. But he didn’t want to keep her from playing, either.)

Isabella didn’t need time to consider her answer. “Nah, I’d rather stay here with you. I can’t leave you up here all by yourself! And we’ve got a great view of the match...so we’ll both be able to see it when the soccer team wins!!”

“You mean when the ROBOTICS team wins,” Phineas stated matter-of-factly.

They held tense eye contact for a moment before bursting into laughter.

It felt so good to laugh together.

Isabella’s smile faded a bit as she looked out over the stadium. “....we should have built this for Danville High years ago….” she mused, a hint of melancholy coloring her voice. “Maybe if we’d hung out more when we first started high school…if I hadn’t been so busy...” She winced, unsure if she should be hinting at this to Phineas at all.

After all, SHE was the reason they’d drifted apart in the first place. It was her fault they hadn’t thought to build something together for their peers until a month before their graduation...her fault they’d missed out on years of spending time together.

“Hey.” Phineas placed a hand on Isabella’s shoulder and squeezed it gently, unwilling to let her stay sad.  “The important thing is that it’s built now, no matter how long it took.

“And, we’re hanging out again!” He smiled softly at her. “...we’re going to keep hanging out from now on, right?”

“Definitely!” Isabella agreed with a grin.  

Phineas always knew just what to say to cheer her up.

...

Isabella and Phineas watched the rest of the match unfold from their seats. The soccer team remained in the lead for the rest of the game, much to Isabella’s delight (and Phineas’s chagrin). At last, the game ended, and Isabella shot up from her chair with a shriek of joy.

“WE WON!!!!!!!!! I told you we’d win and WE DID!!!!! WOOOOO!!!!!!!! Who was right??? ME!!”

She plopped back into the chair with a contented sigh.

Phineas frowned and pouted.

“....ok, you know what, you don’t have to rub it in.”

They were so busy reacting to the outcome of the match, they didn’t hear a third party enter the observation deck.

“I’m not interrupting anything, am I?”

Ferb exited the elevator and strode over to where they sat.

And Phineas and Isabella blushed and pretended they hadn’t heard what he said.

“Nice playing out there, Ferb!!” Phineas exclaimed. (He was eager to change the subject). “Even though we lost. You looked great!”

“Thanks! How’s his head, Isabella?” Ferb asked.

“It looks alright!!” Isabella replied with a smile. “I think he’s just going to have a bad bruise.”

Ferb patted his brother on the shoulder. “I think he’ll survive that. Nothing can keep this guy down.”

Phineas grinned. “How’s the stadium holding up down there?”

“It’s holding up well!” Ferb replied. “I did think of ONE modification we could add, though.”

“You did? What is it?”

“A skylight.”

Isabella and Phineas both cocked their heads at Ferb, momentarily confused.

“...not that that’s a bad idea, but why do you want to add a skylight?” Phineas voiced. “Wouldn’t that get in the way of the players’ mobility?”

“Perhaps, but it would make the stadium feel less enclosed, let the players see the sun and clouds during the day and the stars at night.” Ferb explained. He rubbed his chin pensively. “Although…

“I suppose you didn’t need a skylight to see stars earlier....right, Phineas?”

Isabella’s heart practically leapt out of her chest.

“. ...did he just say Phineas didn’t need a skylight to see stars earlier? But...if Ferb said that...then that means….Phineas actually tenderly brushed the hair from my face and said he was seeing stars while looking at me?? That was real????”

Phineas didn’t condone acts of violence.

…..but at this point Ferb was ASKING to be pushed. Or shoved. Or pummeled with an entire arms’ worth of pillows.

“FERB!!!! I was out of it when I said that, okay???” Phineas exclaimed, trying to save face as best he could (and failing, because his face was beet red). “I didn’t know what I was saying!!!”

“....Phineas actually tenderly brushed the hair from my face and said he was seeing stars while looking at me. That was real. Oh my gosh. Ohhhh my gosh. Ohhhhh mY GOSH.”

Phineas dared a glance at Isabella and winced because she was staring at him with wide eyes.

Perhaps she’d forgotten about the “seeing stars” incident until Ferb reminded her of it, and now she was remembering just how weird it had been. She was probably embarrassed. PHINEAS was certainly embarrassed.

…..for the second time that day, he wondered why Ferb hated him.

“Isabella...I’m sorry….” Phineas rubbed the back of his neck, desperate to move past this awkward hurdle and pretend it hadn’t happened at all. “I honestly don’t know what came over me down there, my head was so fuzzy after I got hit. Whatever I said, I didn’t mean it.”

Waaaaait that didn’t sound right.

“I MEAN. Not that you aren’t as beautiful as the stars! Which is what I meant! You are!! I meant that!! That’s true!!! But—I just—"

He was making it worse.

He needed to stop.

“......maybe I hit my head harder than I thought.”

At this point, Ferb deduced the situation had escalated too far for Phineas to handle it alone. It was time for some damage control.

“Alright, Phineas. I think we should head home. You should probably get some sleep.” He nudged Phineas out of his chair. “Isabella, are you walking with us?”

Isabella nodded numbly as she stood. She didn’t trust herself to speak at the moment.

“ .....PHINEAS THINKS I’M BEAUTIFUL?!??!?!??!”

...

The walk home was quiet.

Ferb didn’t usually talk much, so said quiet wasn’t unusual on his end.

But Phineas and Isabella weren’t saying much either. Which was very unusual.

Ferb knew he was probably to blame for that. So he’d decided to give the teasing a rest for the night.

When they arrived in front of Isabella’s house, Ferb said goodbye to her before taking his leave and crossing the street.

(He wasn’t sure whether or not she and Phineas wanted to talk alone, but he wanted to give them space in case they did.)

“So! Uh…” Phineas rubbed the back of his neck. He and Isabella hadn’t really spoken since they left the Football X7 stadium. “Do you want to come over and put the finishing touches on our song tomorrow?”

Isabella blinked and nodded. In all the commotion of the past couple of hours, she’d nearly forgotten about the project. “Yeah, yeah...we should probably do that....we don’t want to put it off until Sunday.”

“Alright. I guess, uh...I guess I’ll text you tomorrow. And then I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“That sounds good. ...I’ll see you then.”

Isabella didn’t look at him as she said goodbye. Her eyes were instead cast upward at the sky and illuminated with starlight.

“....they really are beautiful, aren’t they?” she whispered softly.

Phineas followed her gaze...and his heart stuttered when he realized what she must have been thinking about (and when he realized she didn’t sound embarrassed or flustered at all but rather...somewhat awestruck).

A few seconds ambled by.

Phineas bit his lip and steeled his courage...and then reached out for Isabella’s hand.

“.....they sure are…” he agreed.

Except he wasn’t looking at the sky anymore.

Isabella glanced down at their hands, and then up at Phineas...who was already gazing at her.

Her pulse quickened.

“And...you’re beautiful too…” Phineas whispered gently. “Inside and out….”

He leaned in and pressed a tender kiss to her cheek.

“Thanks for taking care of me earlier. Goodnight, Isabella.”

(Isabella had given him a thank-you kiss a few days ago, after all. If she asked, Phineas could say he was simply returning the favor.)

Isabella couldn’t move. She could barely even stand. Her knees were going to give out any second now.

She watched as Phineas crossed the street, as he made it to his front door, as he waved at her.

She should probably go open her own door.

But she couldn’t move.

Her stomach was in knots and her head was spinning and her heart was pounding so loudly the entire neighborhood could probably hear it.

….she wasn’t in Phineasland again, was she?

She blinked and shook her head, just to be sure.

The rosy warmth on her cheek didn’t fade away. Phineas’s words still echoed clear as day in her mind.

That kiss had been real. His words had been real.

Phineas had said she was beautiful. Twice.

Phineas had kissed her.

…Phineas was still standing outside, waiting for her to go inside.

Somehow, Isabella managed to make it to her front door and open it. Phineas waved in her direction again before shutting his own door (and subsequently melting into a puddle in the foyer, though Isabella had no way of knowing that last bit).

She gazed out across the street and then up at the stars for a few moments as a tentative grin blossomed over her face.

Isabella wasn’t sure what tomorrow would bring...but after tonight, she had a pretty good feeling about it.

“....goodnight, Phineas.”

Ferb chuckled as he stared down at his brother, who lay sprawled out in the middle of the foyer with a lovestruck grin on his face.

“I take it things went well out there?”

Phineas beamed.

“...yes, yes they did.”

...

Thanks so much for reading, and thanks as always to @youruinedmylifebynotbeingreal for being a lovely beta!!!! 

I posted doodles of a few scenes (you can probably guess which ones, lol) for this chapteron my blog if you’d like to check them out!! 

(also @dragonairice drew an AMAZING digital version of the “I suppose you didn’t need a skylight to see stars” scene that you can find here!! pls go check it out, it’s fantastic!!!!) 

Thanks so much for reading, and I’ll see you soonish for chapter 6! It’s gonna be a good one!!! ;D

(also, if there are any music theorists reading this, pls don't hate me for the barebones theory lesson at the beginning of the chapter. I tried to explain dominant and tonic chords as simply as I could, but I know there is a lot more to them than what I wrote! LOL)

[fantastic-bby]

Books & Poems I love

Hello, I am just dumping my favourite books and poems here because I like them and I want people to read them too bcs they're cool. Disclaimer: I haven't read some of these books in a REALLY long time, so the explanations might be a bit off since this is mostly what I remember from when I had read them. All will be under the cut and I hope someone out there finds these as enjoyable as I do!

Books

1. Huntress by Malinda Lo

Nature is out of balance in the human world. The sun hasn’t shone in years, and crops are failing. Worse yet, strange and hostile creatures have begun to appear. The people’s survival hangs in the balance.

To solve the crisis, the oracle stones are cast, and Kaede and Taisin, two seventeen-year-old girls, are picked to go on a dangerous and unheard-of journey to Tanlili, the city of the Fairy Queen. Taisin is a sage, thrumming with magic, and Kaede is of the earth, without a speck of the otherworldly. And yet the two girls’ destinies are drawn together during the mission. As members of their party succumb to unearthly attacks and fairy tricks, the two come to rely on each other and even begin to fall in love. But the Kingdom needs only one huntress to save it, and what it takes could tear Kaede and Taisin apart forever.

I cannot express how much I adore this book. It's so well-written and the entire book feels like such an adventure to read. I have to warn everyone who will read this that it is quite violent. I also love the WLW inclusion which is carried throughout the story. It's also mentioned in the beginning that Kaede does not want to marry a prince because she could never marry a man. It's filled with lots of romance and it's fantasy because I'm a sucker for fantasy reads.

My sister had bought this book for me after I had lost my first copy and my cat peed on my second copy. The first time, I had bought it from a Big Bad Wolf sale in about 2014. The second, I ordered it through Kinokuniya, but I'm pretty sure you can get it off of Amazon as well.

2. Teardrop by Lauren Kate

Never, ever cry . . .

Seventeen-year-old Eureka won't let anyone close enough to feel her pain. After her mother was killed in a freak accident, the things she used to love hold no meaning. She wants to escape, but one thing holds her back: Ander, the boy who is everywhere she goes, whose turquoise eyes are like the ocean.

And then Eureka uncovers an ancient tale of romance and heartbreak, about a girl who cried an entire continent into the sea. Suddenly her mother's death and Ander's appearance seem connected, and her life takes on dark undercurrents that don't make sense.

Can everything you love be washed away?

This is also a book that I've read multiple times. I've even read the sequel, Waterfall, but I don't think I actually got around to finishing it since I bought it right before my exams. Another love and fantasy novel, it covers a lot of grieving and pain that Eureka goes through after losing her mother and at one point, she actually wishes it was her that had died during the accident.

Her relationship with Ander is quite sudden since he just shows up out of nowhere and just happens to know practically everything about her. I, personally, enjoy this book out of the amount of angst that it's filled with. It's very well-written and I still have the first copy that I bought at the same Big Bad Wolf sale that I had gotten Huntress. I think I had gotten the sequal at Kinokuniya as well (?), but I'm not entirely sure because it's been a really long time.

3. Shatter Me by Tahereh Mafi

No one knows why Juliette's touch is fatal, but The Reestablishment has plans for her. Plans to use her as a weapon. But Juliette has plans of her own. After a lifetime without freedom, she's finally discovering a strength to fight back for the very first time--and to find a future with the one boy she thought she's lost forever.

Another very angsty book. It centres around Juliette, a girl who, for some reason, kills everyone she touches. It's also written in First POV and in the format of a journal. It feels more personal because some of the lines are striked through to show a thought that Juliette had in the moment of writing that she decided to replace with a different approach instead.

The beginning is basically Juliette being locked away in some sort of a prison because of her 'gift' and she writes to keep herself from going crazy, but then one day some guy is put into the same cell as her. It's another romance novel and also a kind of superhero novel It also gets pretty... ahem... seggsy... at one point, but it's a good read.

I've read the entire series aside from Restore Me. I have it, but I haven't gotten around to reading it yet. Shatter Me is also from the same Big Bad Wolf sale as the other two lol. Juliette is also trapped in a love triangle at one point, but I won't get into it. It also gets a bit violent, but slightly less graphic than Huntress is and is also another 'self-discover' kinda book. (can you see a theme here that I read lol)

4. Winter's End by Jean-Claude Mourlevat

Four teenagers escape from their prison-like boarding schools to take up the fight against the tyrannical government that murdered their parents fifteen years earlier. But only three of the friends make it safely to Jahn's restaurant, the headquarters of a secret resistance movement, where they discover the astonishing power that one voice can have in the fight for freedom.

As the battle rages, the three friends are in a race against time to save their companion, who has been forced to participate in a deadly, ancient game for the amusement of his captors. Will this new generation prevail, or are they destined to meet the same grisly fate as their parents?

This is also extremely angsty. It's also pretty violent as well, so that's a warning for whoever will read this. Once again, well-written, nice flow to the story and I just really like this book. There's a lot of uncovering in the book that makes you go HUH because the four students end up uncovering a lot about their government and the secrets that involve the four of them.

It has a very heavy dark tone to it, which I really enjoy. It's a bit different from the other three which is less fantasy and more of a dystopian book. It's a very heroic, determination feeling that follows the students as they journey throughout the book. Also something that follows the students are a group of dog-men... things... that I'm pretty sure I actually had small nightmares imagining when I had read this in around 2013 or 2014.

Poems

Disclaimer: Half of these were poems I did essays on in high school aside from L. These are my illustrations of it and they're the ones that stood out to me when I had first read them.

1. Daffodils by William Wordsworth

I read this in high school when I was taking English Literature. It's a poem that Wordsworth wrote after his wife had passed away. I love the way it's written and William Wordsworth is one of my favourite poets. It's filled with the feeling of being lost and rediscovering the joys of the small things in life. There's a lot of imagery that refers to the flower, daffodil, and overall, it's just a a very soft themed poem.

I think the reason this poem stood out to me was because I was feeling a bit lost at the time I read it (the end of highschool) and I was desperately trying to find something I could relate to in some way.

2. Winter by Andrew Young

Another one that contains a lot of imagery. It's a poem about the beauty of Winter and how, while it's seen as a dark and gloomy season, it has hidden beauties that you can see if you're able to look past the initial image of it.

This poem in particular, I'm pretty sure I have a soft spot for in my heart mainly because of the soft spot I have for Winter in general.

3. London by William Blake

This is a more dark toned poem. It covers what old London used to be like with the raging poverty at the time. A lot of child labour and sex workers that would struggle with making money when they would accidentally get pregnant.

It's quite a depressing poem that I like because of the dark undertone and I, personally, really enjoy William Blake's works.

4. L by Bernice Chauly

L is a poem about how her daughter had cut her hair right after going to the hairdressers. While Chauly's daughter is crying when she yells at her, Chauly is reminded of when she had done something similar when she had just turned five years old. She thinks back to it and remembers that, at the time, all she wanted was to see her late father.

This is also more heavy set and it makes me think of the way children must feel when they lose their parents at such young ages.

[blu-joons]

BTS Reaction: Finding You Asleep Over Your College Work

Jin:

He came in front the studio late, finding you laid out across the coffee table, pen still in hand, a long scribbled across one of your pages from where you’d moved.

“Oh, jagi,” he chuckled, “you really are the cutest,” he smiled, taking the pen away.

He toyed with the idea of waking you up, knowing you’d probably want him to. “Babe, you need to wake up sweetheart, let me take you up to bed or something?”

“Jin,” you whispered, opening your eyes slowly, “when did you even come home?” You asked, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.

“A few minutes ago, you need to go to sleep love.”

You shook your head, “I’m fine, I just needed a nap,” you protested, a small yawn emerging.

“That’s not true, you need sleep. Come on,” he smiled, pulling you up from your chair. “Your work will still be there tomorrow when you can work on a fresh brain.”

Your hands gripped onto him as he slowly made his way upstairs with his arm wrapped around your waist. “It’s so stressful all this work,” you whimpered.

“I know, but you’re doing so well. You’ll get there, I promise,” he whispered, pecking your cheek.

“I sure hope so.”

Yoongi:

His heart skipped a beat when he found you, carrying you up to bed with ease, tucking you up under the duvet, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head.

“Yoongs, is that you?” You whispered, reaching out for him to hold your hand.

He smiled down at you, your eyes still shut, “it’s me. You’re alright, you’re just tired so I’ve brought you up to bed to get some sleep, you sure need it, you’re too stressed.”

“No,” you mumbled, “I need to finish my essay, take me back downstairs please,” you requested, lifting your arms up for him to pick you up.

“You can’t even open your eyes, let alone do work.”

You tried to open your eyes, but it came to no avail, hearing Yoongi snigger.

“I can, just give me a moment,” you lightly chuckled, Yoongi doing the same. “Alright, I’m tired, but there’s just so much to do and such little time.”

He laid down beside you, pulling you into him, “get a good sleep in you and you’ll feel a lot better, you need to take a break from it.”

“You’re right, thank you for looking after me. Will you lay here with me for a while?” You asked.

“Of course, I’m right here.”

Hoseok:

Walking into your room he found you laid out, paperwork all over your desk where you’d moved your arms around trying to get comfortable, messing everything up.

“What are we going to do with you?” He chuckled, picking a few bits of paper up.

He began to align the page numbers together when you stirred, reaching for your pencil. “What happened?” You asked, seeing Hobi beside you.

“You fell asleep, you’re shattered,” he softly smiled, “you need to get some rest my love, this isn’t doing you any good when you’re trying to work.”

You looked down noticing the paper in his hands, “did you read it?”

“No,” he laughed, “I just reordered it after you messed it up, I hope they are all back in the right order.”

“Good, because it’s rubbish,” you sighed, running your hands through your hair. “I might just start again; I’ve got enough time before it’s due in to make it better.”

He shook his head, “you don’t need to do that. Have a sleep, clear your mind, then read back through it, I can guarantee you’ll be happy with it.”

“I don’t know, I’m pretty sure what I wrote before I slept was a load of trash,” you chuckled, “I was half asleep anyway.”

“Well, yeah, you might want to delete that bit.”

Namjoon:

There was no way on the earth he was going to wake you up when he found you asleep, you’d worked yourself too hard, and now you were paying the price for it.

“I always tell you that you need to slow down,” he chuckled, picking up your pens.

He placed them in their pot, gathering the rest of your stationary. “You’re too stubborn for your own good sometimes, I say these things for a reason, because I care.”

“But I know how much getting this done means to you, so I guess I’ll let you off,” he giggled, moving on to shut your laptop down.

“I’ve saved your work, so no need to worry about that.”

You stirred silently, “just stay asleep, pretend like I’m not even in the room, there’s no one here.”

“I know you’re stressed, but I’m proud of you, you’ll ace these exams and essays,” he assured you, filing your paperwork back up into their folders.

His hands ran along your back, “take some time to look after yourself, you need to be healthy and you need to be calm, your brain doesn’t need the worry.”

“It’s easier said then done, but I’ll look after you, always, you look so cute sleeping, have I ever told you that,” he teased, kissing the top of your head.

“Joon, is that you?”

Jimin:

He cringed when he saw the uncomfortable position you laid in across your laptop and books, your arms were bent in random directions, but you were too asleep to care.

“Honestly, you’re a mess,” he chuckled, walking straight over, trying to pick you up.

You shuffled at his cold touch, opening your eyes up. “Why are you looking at me like that? What have I done this time?” You smiled, sitting upright.

“Do you seriously not remember falling asleep?” He asked, pointing out the mess your work was in, “are you really that exhausted?”

“I only shut my eyes for thirty seconds, surely.”

His head shook, “not by the looks of it, you were long gone, your tired baby, you need sleep.”

“No, what I need is to work,” you retorted, grabbing your books only for him to snatch them around. “Jimin, seriously, I need to get this completed, don’t play games.”

He shook his head, moving away from you. “The only game I’m playing is the one where you go to bed, and I’m not having any arguments about it, get up those stairs.”

“Fine, but only for five minutes and then let me get back to my work,” you sighed, following behind him.

“It will be a miracle if you’re awake in five minutes.”

Taehyung:

The sound of the television still on disturbed him as he made his way into the kitchen, peering in to see the documentary you were watching, only for you to be asleep.

“Let me pause that,” he spoke, walking over to stop it from continuing.

He grabbed a blanket from the top of the sofa, draping it over your body, “you’re alright, stay there, I’ve paused the documentary, don’t be disturbed, you’re fine.”

“Can you lay with me?” You asked, slightly opening your eyes to look at Taehyung. “Or, if you’re busy, it doesn’t matter, I don’t want to be a bother.”

“Don’t be silly, shuffle over a bit then.”

“Thank you,” you smiled, making room for him, “and thank you for pausing the documentary.”

“You’re welcome, what was it even on, it looked quite interesting,” he spoke, wrapping his arm tightly around your waist, bringing you close.

You giggled, shaking your head, “it’s so boring, but I’ve got to watch it for the lesson on Thursday, there’s no way out of watching it unfortunately.”

“That sucks. Maybe we can watch it together tomorrow? I’ll try and make it a bit more bearable for you.”

“That would be amazing, you’re the best!”

Jungkook:

Cautiously his arms wrapped around you, picking you up bridal style, vowing to come back down and clear up your desk once he’d safely put you to bed to sleep.

“I knew you needed sleep earlier,” he sighed, pressing a delicate kiss to the top of your head.

He laid you down on the bed, thinking he’d succeeded into he heard you whisper his name, “Kookie,” you sighed, opening your eyes up.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” he smiled, sitting on the end of the bed. “Don’t panic, your work is downstairs, where it will remain until tomorrow.”

“Thank you, a break is definitely what I need right now.”

“You needed a break three hours ago,” he teased, “but you didn’t listen to me, and now look at you.”

“Don’t be like that,” you sighed, “you’re stubborn too! I thought I could get it done, but I was wrong, and now I’m just shattered and very sore.”

He laid down beside you, cuddling you close, “you work yourself too hard, I know you’re stressed, and I understand that, but take some time for you too.”

“I will, from now I will listen and take breaks like you tell me too, I promise,” you said, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“That’s what I like to hear.”

---

Masterlist

[royalcordelia]

Hey babe it’s me, your wife. I’d love it if you wrote a drabble based on any of the shots from the trailer that really sparked your imagination. Maybe expand on the Diana and jerry cuteness? Or the satanic ritual? Or the dance lessons? Whatever your sweet heart desires! Sorry this isn’t very straightforward 🤪

@neveragainsanta​‘s prompt was my idea for yours, Alex, so I’m merging the two! Hope you both don’t mind! 

things that fall (i, for you)

“Certainly more catastrophic things have happened before,” reasoned a panicked Anne. “Like the burning of the library of Alexandria, the crucifixion of Christ, the falling of Rome…” She stared at her reflection,cursed her own eternal stupidity. She wished she could turn her imaginative brain off so she’d stop seeing her cheeks as two ripe strawberries with a million freckles for seeds.  

“All you did was kiss a boy,” Anne tried to reason evenly, but failed miserably. All at once, the realization crashed over her as devastating as if it had just happened. In a low, scared voice, Anne stared back at her own terrified reflection, “I kissed Gilbert Blythe. I kissed Gilbert Blythe.” 

Tearing away from her mirror, Anne collapsed onto her bed, hands covering her eyes as a universes’ worth of shame settled on her like a thick blanket.

“How am I going to tell Diana? Oh god, how am I going to face him at school?” 

Perhaps in the back of her mind, she was ignoring a somewhat important fact. Sure, she had kissed Gilbert Blythe, but he had kissed her back. Quite enthusiastically too, for a boy who’d never kissed anyone before. 

It certainly wasn’t the logical outcome for how the interaction began. Squeezing her eyes shut, Anne tried with all her might to keep the memory from replaying in front of her eyes, but it was there over, and over, and over- 

She’d been watering the flowers along the side of the house when she heard his footsteps striking the ground at an astonishing pace. Half expecting a horse to be galloping up the lane, she jumped when she realized Gilbert Blythe was running up to see her. When he was close enough them to meet gazes, his face burst into a wide grin.

“Anne, you won’t believe it!” he called out. Some of the chickens pecking around the barn rustled at the sudden call into the farm’s peaceful quiet. Anne hurried to the gate, but he skidded to a stop right in front of her before she could open it. 

“Gilbert Blythe, what on earth has gotten into you?” 

Catching his breath, Gilbert hunched over his knees and let out a wispy laugh. 

“Guess why I’ve come,” he said excitedly. 

“I…I couldn’t even begin to fathom!” she replied, her own laughter at his askew appearance making his smile even wider. The warm weather had turned his cheeks a pale red, and the afternoon sun glimmered the iridescent highlights in his hair, like the milky way against its dark galaxy. Anne could deny it when asked, but was hopeless at denying to herself that Gilbert had grown abundantly handsome in the last year. Yet, his heart changed so little. When he pressed his lips firmly together, Anne resisted the urge to reach over and shake him. “Aren’t you going to tell me?” 

“Give me one good guess, and then I will reveal what I know,” he said with pretend officiality. Anne placed a finger on her chin as mimicked a person deep in contemplation. 

“You’ve decided to join the traveling circus and become their trapeze walker,” Anne supposed. His hearty guffaw hit her ears like beautiful music that was so pleasant, Anne nearly repeated her joke in hopes that she might hear it again. 

“That was indeed a good guess. It’s even better!”

“Better? Now I’m almost anxious!” 

A confident glint took life in his eyes as he pulled a folded up newspaper snippet from his pocket. The sight of the wheat-colored paper made Anne’s nerves spark with electricity for reasons that she didn’t understand. With a tentative look in her eye, she took the slip when he offered it and peered down at it’s contents. 

Queen’s College Pupil Acceptance (In order of test scores)

1. Gilbert Blythe (Avonlea) - Score 200

Anne’s heart filled with bitterness. Of course he only came to gloat about his own success. They’d been studying together, joking about who would come in first at Queen’s together, tackling their textbooks together. He’d told her how much she improved, and for the first time in her life, Anne wondered that she might finally be first in something - fair and square. 

“You must be so pleased, Gil,” Anne found the strength to mutter, folding the paper back up. If she turned her gaze from the ground, she might see the utter incredulity with which he gawked. 

“Anne. Anne, look again. With both eyes this time!” 

Against her better judgement, she did. 

1. Gilbert Blythe (Avonlea) - Score 200

1. Anne Shirley-Cuthbert (Avonlea) - Score 200

“We tied,” Gilbert said.

Anne felt like she’d gained ten years of her life back. Her head shot up to Gilbert and met his confident joy with her frantic excitement. All the time they’d spent studying together into the sunset hours had paid off. All the times he’d teased her over geometry, all the times she’d poked him over a misspelled word in his essay, every fumbling compliment to keep the other motivated had all led to this. They’d done it! 

She hopped onto the fence, took Gilbert by the face and kissed him. 

Don’t ask her why she did it. In retrospect, she supposed she wanted to in the moment. (And tragically, now that she’d done it once, she wanted to do it again, and again, and again, and) 

Neither of them knew what to do. Not just because of their inexperience but also because they were kissing. They were friends, kindred spirits, orphans who understood each other, and they were kissing.

The books she read never gave much detail about kissing, and the few moments of affection Anne had witnessed in couples were so brief, she could hardly take notes. How long were you supposed to kiss? Was this too long?  

Just as Anne began to pull back, Gilbert chased her so that the connection didn’t break. His hands came up to hold hers on his face, the tenderness of his touch so jolting that she broke back abruptly and stumbled off of the fence. Chancing a look at his face, Anne fortified herself for the worst. 

But Gilbert didn’t look repulsed or upset like she expected, or even afraid like she was. He was never afraid.

“Why’d you do that?” he asked finally, with such a strong hint of hope that Anne had to catch herself from stumbling back another step. 

“I don’t know,” Anne said quickly, quietly. “Can we…um..” 

Do it again?

“Never mention that it happened?” he supplied, tone unreadable.

“Oh, uh, yes. That’s what I meant.”

Clearing his throat, Gilbert ran a hand through his hair with an audibly unsteady sigh, then began back up the lane. 

“Have a nice evening,” he called over his shoulder, but it sounded like words merely leaving his mouth without intention, without meaning.

Laying on her bed, Anne gave a whimpering groan at the memory of it. She’d been wrong when she assumed that she could kiss a boy if she felt like it. If that were true, she’d be at his home, at his fence, retrying what they’d stumbled through for a few short seconds. 

Fate was prepared to make the next day of school actual, physical torture as Anne faced the impossible task of avoiding Gilbert. She clung to Diana’s side, attempting to maintain the routine of normalcy of their dull school day, but the news had already spread about the Queen’s results. 

“Anne! Congrats on tying with Gilbert! Did you have any idea before the results came out?” and “Wish the exam was out of 201 so you could’ve beat her, bud!” and “The only reason you tied with him anyways was because he taught you. You could’ve at least repaid him by missing one point.” 

Anne and Gilbert danced around each other, even if Billy and Josie were much worse company. So in the mess of the noise and all the questions, when Charlie asked, “Is Gilbert walking you home today?” Anne’s mouth answered for her. 

“No, he’s not.” 

“Then could I?” 

Anne’s head snapped up, and she looked at Charlie Sloane as if he were an extraterrestrial. 

“No, you cannot.” 

“Why not?” 

“I’m…walking myself! I’m perfectly capable, thank you!” 

Then she dashed away into the coat room. She made quick work of snatching up her hat and pulling on her coat, a sharp pain beginning to form behind her temple. Spinning around, Anne meant to aim right for the door - 

And nearly bumped into Gilbert Blythe who seemed to be attempting the same quick escape. His hands lowered from his hat slowly, as if she was a doe he was afraid of spooking. Anne’s lips parted as she searched her mind for something to say, but for once, she was on her own. 

Gilbert had something to say, she could tell. It was right behind his lips but he bit down harshly on the words to keep them from tumbling out. At last, straightened his hat and gave her a nervous smile. 

“Anne, I heard you tied with me on the Queen’s exam. Congratulations.” 

She blinked. 

“Thank you, Gil. We both worked hard,” she replied slowly. Then, after a beat. “Does this mean you don’t despise me?” 

Gilbert’s eyes squinted, the way he did when he smelled something unpleasant. 

“Why would you think that?” 

From the other side of the coat room, Jane and Tilly threw them a questioning expression. 

“No reason,” Anne answered. “Are you still walking me home today? If not, I don’t mind.” 

The ice between them thawed into nothingness as Gilbert smiled the grin that turned Anne’s knees to liquid. He grabbed her books from her hands and headed out the door with another word. 

Anne felt strawberries on her cheeks again, but this time she didn’t mind. She swept out the door, and fell at Gilbert’s side, admiring the galaxy in his hair and the sweetness in his eyes. For a moment, she wondered if he was looking at her that way too.

[homenum-revelio-hq]

Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix, Maggie!

You have been accepted for the role of HESTIA JONES! We love how you explored Hestia’s “gray” aspects. How she’s torn between doing “the right thing” knowing it’s outside the confines of the law, which she also finds incredibly important. How she’s positive and optimistic, but how that can be hard to maintain during war. We also loved your discussion of how pretty and feminine don’t equal dim - but that she often gets overlooked for it in a sexist world. That’s exactly what we were going for when we wrote her bio! So excited to have you part of the roleplay! 

Please take a look at the new member checklist and send in your account within 24 hours! Thank you for joining the fight against Voldemort!

OUT OF CHARACTER:

NAME: Maggie

AGE: 23

TIMEZONE: CEST

ACTIVITY LEVEL: I’m a student, so I normally have a very flexible schedule with time to write. Sometimes things will be more hectic, in periods where I’m swarmed with essays or exams, but I always try to carve time out to get some replies done

ANYTHING ELSE: No triggers or anything. I have a few years of experience RPing on tumblr, and lately I’ve been in a similar role-play focusing on long-term character development and longer para-based writing.

CHARACTER DETAILS:

NAME: Hestia Jones

AGE: 18

GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY: Cisfemale, she / her. When it comes to sexuality, Hestia is still in the discovery phase. Currently, she identifies as heterosexual, although she has sometimes questioned it. While Hestia is the kind to get surface-level crushes easily, deeper feelings comes a lot rarer and she thus doesn’t feel like she has enough experience with love / attraction to sort out what exactly she’s feeling. Sometimes she finds girls pretty too, giving her heart the same flutter as pretty boys, but she’s unsure if that means she likes-likes them. Hestia has shrugged it off at the moment and reckons she can figure it out as she goes along.

BLOOD STATUS: Half-blood

HOUSE ALUMNI: Ravenclaw

ANY CHANGES: None

CHARACTER BACKGROUND:

PERSONALITY:

At a first glance, it’s easy to overlook Hestia. But only for a moment - and only if her mouth is closed. While Hestia’s never been the kind to chatter mindlessly, she’s never been the kind to ponder in silence either. Her way of interacting with the world has always been to question it and she learned early on that asking out loud might give her an answer.

She was never the child that could sit quietly for hours and play. She’d race through the house, through the backyard (and the streets if her parents didn’t catch her), a hurricane of braids and skirts, a million question bubbling at all times. Her parents learned quickly that it was better to let her test her abilities -magical and normal- under supervision. She was always an outgoing child, happy to make friends with anyone from the kid next door to the mailman walking past, and thrived when she started Hogwarts. There was no question Ravenclaw was the house for her, filled with other likeminded kids to encourage and challenge her.  

Hestia is outspoken, sometimes coming of as abrasive when she get heated up. While she tries to avoid staring arguments, Hestia’s never been one to shy away from one either and is more than willing to defend herself - or someone else. It is easy to believe that if someone is kind, they’re a pushover, and if someone dresses prettily, they’re vapid - two assumptions that Hestia has rebelled hard against her entire life. She hates being dismissed for not wanting to trample over others, hates the idea of having to act cynical to be taken seriously. Hestia has a thousand thoughts and ideas, topics and questions brewing at any given moment. That doesn’t stop her from being kind, or from making friends. Most importantly, being feminine doesn’t make her less capable. As a child, she’d scoffed at the notion of having to chose between brains and beauty. She had scoffed - only to find it a trope that haunted her. While it was no doubt where she belonged once she started Hogwarts, and Hestia loved being in a house filled with likeminded people, she sometimes felt like she was hand waved away for not dropping parts of herself. Hestia made it difficult for anyone who talked to her to ignore her, but it didn’t stop her from getting into rows. More than anything, Hestia dislikes being underestimated.

One of Hestia’s issues is that she easily gets tunnel vision when it comes to solving problems, often seeing things as very black or white. Growing up in sleepy Scarborough, with a small population and an even smaller magical one, she was kept quite sheltered in terms of the problems in the wizarding world. Her parents explained the basics of how the magical world worked but avoided the issues of it - both for her sake and for theirs. They were content keeping to their corner and not rocking the boat. Hestia, as it would turn out, was not. Starting at Hogwarts taught her a lot of new things, including many of the injustices of the world that had been kept hidden from her. At eleven, it was vague concepts but the more she grew, the more she questioned, the clearer it became. As things grew bleaker as the dark side grew stronger, Hestia’s drive to do something grew as well. While she is clever, Hestia often doesn’t know when to stop- when it’s smart to walk away from an argument, when to admit defeat. It drove her into magical law, and later into joining the Order.

Hestia wants to do good. It’s one of her driving forces - clambering to fix at least a little corner of the world. To make something better for someone. But it’s difficult to keep an upbeat attitude when it feels like the world is determined to get a little worse each day. Sometimes it feels like pushing a rock up a hill, when the news keep pouring in and her efforts keep pouring out. It’s enough to chip away at the confidence of even the most chipper, optimistic person. And while Hestia is optimistic, she’s not naive. Some days it feels difficult to keep hope up, but she keeps fighting in the belief that if you keep pushing, something has to give. Even if it’s just the tiniest pebble. So Hestia keeps going, even on the days when the world keeps kicking when you’re down. She has always been stubborn, and she has never backed away from a fight before - so why stop when it’s something that matters?

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY:

Hestia was the not quite planned, but more than welcome kid. Her father, Richard, was working as an editor for a publication focusing on magical authors and her mother, Delia, had just started working as an English teacher at the local muggle school. Hestia came with a bang; faster and with a bit more drama than either of them had expected, and it set the precedent. She was always a curious child, defying both muggle and magical child-proofings as she climbed across the house. Both her parents discovered quickly that the best way to keep her still was by distracting her through making her think. Delia would bring home puzzles, growing more complex as Hestia did, and Richard would fire off riddles and questions, pushing her to think outside the box and work her way through problems. As she grew older she would, in return, come up with her own riddles.

As a child, Hestia never ran out of questions. Her mom liked to joke that her first word was ‘why’, and that at the very least it was her favourite word. Hestia didn’t just want to know about why things happened - she wanted to know how they functioned as it did. How did the sky change colours? Why did birds fly certain places, how did their wings work, how did they know where to go? How did rain form, how did she grow?

If her parents ever grew tired of her constant stream of questions, they never showed it. They explained what they could when they had time, encouraging her to explore the reasoning of the world they lived in. If Hestia’s favourite phrase was ‘how does this work’, her father’s was ‘let’s find out’. When she grew older and her questions became more complex, he taught her how to navigate information and find answers. Every Saturday, he would take her to the library, where she’d spend hours browsing for books containing whatever topic that had caught her that week. They’d find enough books to tide her over until the next weekend. Hestia has many fond memories of sitting next to her mother while she graded papers and tests, reading her books and sharing the most interesting bits. While her parents might have been hesitant towards her experimenting with magic, trying to understand that part of herself, they never stopped her from learning.

While Hestia still loves her parents very much, her relationship with them started changing as she grew older. Her bubble expanded the day she went to Hogwarts, opening her view to the topics her parents had skirted away from. Her questions about the world became more difficult, and for the first time her parents didn’t have any way to help her find answers. Even worse, they didn’t want to. How come the wizarding world has such deep-rooted issues? Why did so many stay content knowing about the prejudice and injustice that ran rampant? It started as innocent questions once it became clear to 11 year old Hestia how important blood purity was to so many, and evolved as she grew older. Hestia did as her father had taught her -finding answers by looking for them- and that was how her interest for magical law started.

Her relationships to her parents kept changing as she grew, and it reached a new foothold when she graduated. They were delighted when she got an internship at the Department of Magical Law, happy that their daughter was reaching high and aligning herself with the Ministry. They are none the wiser about her involvement with the Order, and Hestia intends to keep it that way. She has distanced herself from them after joining; a part of her feels guilty keeping such a large secret from them, and even more so about putting them in potential danger through association with her. So it’s easier to not talk about it. She knows they would be horrified at her involvement - her parents that she loves so much, but that will always prefer to avoid the hard questions, to look away. It is a difficult process, growing up and realizing that your parents are just humans, with flaws and problems, and Hestia is still learning to navigate this new landscape.

OCCUPATION:

Hestia is currently an intern at the Department of Magical Law. She is just starting out and trying to find her footing, bouncing around doing the paperwork and research reading. While she hasn’t quite worked her way up to getting to handle any of the important cases -or a permanent position for that sake- Hestia loves her job and is determined to plant her roots in the department. She leaps at the chance to be given any kind of responsibility, taking on anything from coffee-runs to extra work. Hestia knows how it goes, and is determined to work her way upward through hard work - and she’ll do it all with a smile.

Her interest in law-work started around her fifth year, when it was time to start considering where she wanted her life to go post-Hogwarts. Hestia had always known that she wanted to have a job that challenged her, and she had always dreamt of having a job that mattered. Certain parts of the wizarding world had always bothered her and a childish part of her had always dreamed of helping to fix it. While researching careers and stumbling over the Department of Magical Law, Hestia started playing with the idea of making her childish dream a reality. It became clear what she wanted to do and she has geared towards it since. She thinks its perfect for her; not only does she get to be a part of something bigger, trying to make the world better through legal channels, but she also gets to spend her days pouring over texts, finding arguments and logic nestles within pages. While she is a long way from being able to lobby for dismantling the outdated laws, she’ll get there some day.

ROLE WITHIN THE ORDER/THOUGHTS ABOUT THE ORDER:

Hestia is on the newer side of the Order, still on the low-level and trying to find how her talents are best put to use. She contributes where she can, coming up with ideas and suggestions, joining the missions she’s asked to. While Hestia does believe in the work they do, she still harbors some conflicted feelings. Her work is within the law -the law that she truly believes can be fixed if enough good minds keep working on it- and it feels hypocritical to be a part of a group that’s outside of it, even if she’s working towards the same goal with both the Order and her job. Then there’s the question of what would happen if she got caught; her Order involvement could jeopardize the good she can do from within the Ministry. When first asked to join, Hestia hesitated, considering the risk and gains. In the Department of Magical Law, she could create long-term groundwork to help future generations, which would stop if she got arrested. In the end, Hestia decided that while fixing magical laws to prevent future discriminations is important, it would take too long. People are being killed now, muggleborns are running for their lives now.

While she doesn’t regret her decision, that doesn’t mean her involvement has been smooth sailing either. First of all, there’s the issue of clashing with some of the other members. Hestia hates being dismissed and passed over for her appearance, hates having good ideas waved away or being bossed around. While Hestia likes to be friendly, it doesn’t mean that she’s going to let people step on her either. Then there’s the Order itself. Hestia has by all means lived a pretty sheltered life, and is fresh out of school with a good amount of youthful optimism. She still sees things as pretty black and white - even if she’s part of an illegal group, it’s the right thing to do in her eyes. She has strong ideals, that gets a bit more challenged each day. Hestia is slowly coming to terms with the world -and particularly the Order- being a lot more grey than she thought. That doesn’t mean that some of their work sit easy with her. Especially recent deaths make her uneasy, making her views of what is right more difficult. Hestia knew that the Order is desperate, weary, but how far are they willing to go to to make the overall situation better? Where do they draw the line? Where does she?

SURVIVAL:

Hestia’s work is her survival. It’s her distraction, her alibi, her sanity. While she has no doubt that joining the Order was the right move, it still makes her feel uneasy standing opposite the law - even when it’s the right thing to do. So she throws herself at her work, compensating her work outside the law by working hard within it. It gives her comfort when things look bleak within the Order, to know that she can help in another way. If the Order’s mission fail, Merlin forbid, then the law will still be there. Chipped and with its flaws, it’s still there. It can be worked on, it can be improved.

It also makes her look inconspicuous. Hestia’s hopes are that someone so dedicated to the laws and rules of the wizarding world won’t arise suspicion of being in the Order. If her presence is missed or she has to reject a social advance, she’ll cite mountains of paperwork as a reason for staying home, joking that interns are always given the worst tasks nobody else wants to take on. Still, she takes precautions to not be associated with the vigilante group. She likes to travel around when she’s not working, making it less suspicious to rarely be seen around her flat in Queensway. She avoids the topic of the Order when she can, content to shake her head in disapproval or tsk as she knows how oftentimes choosing words too carefully says more than you intend to.

RELATIONSHIPS:

Hestia is desperately trying to manage her relationships but it’s difficult. She navigates different spheres, there’s her normal friends, her work friends, the Order and her family - all of which are taking hits. Hestia has a lot on her plate. Time-wise, the Ministry takes a huge chunk of her days, and she is working hard to not neglect her Order position either. Then there is the Order itself. Outside it, Hestia is navigating how to keep it at a distance. It’s difficult to have deep, meaningful conversations when you’re afraid that you’ll slip up, say something wrong that raises suspicion, especially in this world where the wrong person learning the wrong thing can be disastrous. There’s the guilt of lying, of putting her loved ones in danger.

Then there’s the war, the weight of being involved with it. There’s this weight on her shoulders, that demands so much of her time and mentality, that she can’t talk to anyone about outside the Order. While she is making friends within it, she’s also arguing with others. Arguments she can’t vent about. The people she does like have enough on their plate and friendships are difficult when you’re worried about overloading them.

OOC EXPLORATION:

SHIPS/ANTI-SHIPS: My main basis for ships / anti-ships is chemistry. I rarely go in with ideas of ships beforehand, preferring to see how relationships and chemistry evolves.

WHAT PRIVILEGES AND BIASES DOES YOUR CHARACTER HAVE?

Hestia always sort of fell in-between when it comes to this point, having the sort of privilege that you don’t necessarily recognize until you look back. Her family wasn’t swimming in money and prestige like some of the wizarding families, and neither did she have the pure blood that is lauded. But as a half-blood, she didn’t fall lowest on the pecking order, with enough magic in her veins to not have to worry about being targeted for her muggle part - at least not in the way muggleborns have to worry about. Neither did her family really struggle. While the Joneses didn’t have manors and summer homes, they had a steady house in a good neighborhood. Hestia never had to worry about things like food or new clothes, there were no difficulties when she needed school supplies.

When it comes to biases, Hestia, like everyone else, has a few built in. While she is eager to work for a more just society, it is a bit harder to shed the feelings that’s been instilled in her - some that she might not even recognize. She grew up with stories and warnings that integrated themselves as part of her worldview (stay in your bed during the full moon, lest werewolves eat you, careful in forests for giants have to qualms eating you) and it’s difficult to shed biases when you don’t necessarily recognize them as such.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO?

Is saying ‘absolutely everything’ a lazy answer? Because my answer is Absolutely Everything. First of all, I think this rp has such an interesting plot and I absolutely love the premise. I think it sounds so fun to write within this world, explore the shades of grey. Second, I really love the focus on deeper character explorations and the style of longer paras (once you’ve been in one lsrp, you can’t go back). Third, everyone seems so nice and good writing partners are worth their weight in gold.

PLOT DROP IDEAS (OPTIONAL): Not at the moment, sorry!

ANYTHING ELSE?: This got a bit longer than intended, but thanks for reading!

[theasstour]

0103. Jupiter.

Tuesday, 22 October 2014

FIC PAGE | CHAPTER SYMPHONY | WORD COUNT: 6k

NB: explicit language, alcohol

Y/N had made plans with Tiana to meet up after Tiana’s lecture, which ended approximately one hour and 30 minutes after Y/N’s. The two girls would do a Sainsbury’s shop together, even though Y/N was more than capable of doing one alone, having someone there was always a comfort. Besides, Tiana and Y/N had started really getting along. It was the small conversations they had with one another while making dinner, or when they met on their way back from uni, or when Tiana knocked on Y/N’s door and wondered what she was doing; it was those moments that had ultimately ended up making the two girls very close. Y/N looked down at her phone that said she had one hour left of her seminar, another text from Tiana under the time reminding her of their “Sainsbury’s date”. Y/N smiled a little before looking up at Teresa when she started talking.

“I don’t know how I know,” Teresa started, arms crossed and looking straight ahead at the blackboard. “But I failed that essay.”

The Monday before, they had handed in the 1000-word reflective essay for Ensemble I, and, by the way Teresa was acting and talking, Y/N had kind of guessed it hadn’t gone as well as she had hoped.

“It doesn’t even count toward our final grade, but I’m still going to fail.”

Regardless of this fact, Y/N had spent hours in the library in the days following up to the essay. She wanted her lecturers to get a good impression of her, no matter the importance of the assignment, and especially Anthony Goddard, her tutor in Ensemble I. She had a feeling he wasn’t easy to impress, even though he had, according to Finn, liked him very much, thrilling him with his talents. Y/N very much wanted that to be her, and so she thought if she aced this reflective essay about her own skills on her primary instrument – the violin –, how they came to be and how she can improve, Goddard had to like her, right?

The class had a 15-minute break in the middle of the three-hour long seminar, and Y/N and Teresa were just sitting in their usual spot in the middle of the half-circle, talking about everything and nothing. Though Y/N had zoned out of Teresa’s monologue, her brain in a never-ending spiral about how this essay would not be graded, just a paper for Goddard to read and get to know his young new musicians better. Everything was down to the exam: the performance in December. Y/N’s heart started hammering a little to loudly in her ears, her breathing increasing.

“Y/N?”

Y/N looked at Teresa, a small furrow to her eyebrows as she glanced at her friend.

“You good?”

“Yea, just blacked out for a second.”

Teresa studied Y/N for a second, about to ask why, when Goddard cleared his throat and clapped his hands together at the front of the room. They both looked over at him, watching as he motioned to the girl standing beside him. She was smiling, and something in that smile, her dark skin and the straight black hair, rung a bell somewhere in the back of Y/N’s mind.

“Now that everyone has handed their essay in on Canvas, the next thing you should be thinking about is your exam on December 9th. It might seem far away, but it’s not, because if it’s one thing time does when you’re at uni, it’s fly. So, this is one of my students from last year, Wynter, she’s a second year now.”

Wynter gave a small wave, and Y/N instantly knew where she had seen her before. It was the same girl that had checked her in on the first day of Freshers Week. When their eyes met, Wynter’s smile widened and she gave Y/N a small nod, which Y/N returned.

“Wynter was so kind to come here to talk about your exam and her experience doing it last year. If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask them. I will be sitting over here,” Goddard pointed at the desk at the front of the classroom. “Take it away, Wynter.”

As Goddard let Wynter take the stage, Y/N instantly saw the beautiful girl ease into her role as temporary lecturer. Folding her hands together at her front, Wynter looked around the room at everyone and cleared her throat slightly.

“What I think most people do wrong when they choose a piece for their exam, is do a hard one. Please do not do that.” Wynter said, shaking her head. “Don’t pick a song or solo that could ultimately end up being too hard for you. This is after all Ensemble I: The Art of Performing, and you’re here to outdo your previous works, but not to set yourself up for failure, yea?"

Y/N jotted that down into her notebook. Do not set yourself up for failure, pick a doable song.

“My instrument is the oboe, and I did an instrumental cover of Skyfall by Adele. I got a 78%.” She shrugged her shoulder, smiling still. “You don’t have to do it much harder than that. Choose a melody that will fit your performance style, your instrument, and most importantly, you.”

Y/N wrote that down as well, feeling her shoulders tense as she started letting herself think more about the performance. Picking a song to impress Goddard, her class, and yet not fail while performing it, would be challenging. Questions ensued, and though Y/N was listening intently to whatever Wynter had to say, she was also in her own little world. She could not seem to stop thinking about this exam, and about the millions of ways it could go wrong. About how many different mistakes it was possible to make and how little time she had to impress Goddard. Five minutes to get a good mark. 300 seconds with everyone’s eyes on her. Y/N hated herself for thinking about this, for always finding everything that could go wrong before even focusing on the task at hand academically. When Goddard announced the end of the seminar, Y/N blinked herself out of her trance and shot upright. Collecting her stuff, she jumped as she heard a voice from behind her.

“Y/N, right?”

Wynter was smiling at her, the same smile she had given Y/N on that first day weeks ago. Y/N nodded in response.

“I’m Wynter, I signed you in?”

“Yea, I remember you.” Y/N nodded again.

“Good! How’s uni life treating you? Is it as bad as you thought it’d be?” Giggled Wynter.

“It’s great, yea. Been a bit more hectic than I thought it would be, but I’m hanging in there.” Y/N said. “Been a bit overwhelming.”

“Oh, I can imagine.” Wynter hoisted the strap of her bag further up her shoulder. “University is very overwhelming at first, there is a lot going on and not enough time for it all. But you’ll find a balance.” Wynter looked down at her watch, sighing. “Have to run, have a Student Representatives meeting in 10. I’ll see you around, yea?”

But Wynter was off before Y/N could utter another word. Staring wordlessly after her, Teresa stepped into Y/N’s field of vision, eyebrows raised.

“Know her?”

“She checked me in Freshers Week.”

“Ahh!” Teresa started walking and Y/N followed her out of the classroom. “Was starting to wonder if you maybe had a thing going on.”

“What? W-Why?” Y/N recognised that she responded to Teresa’s statement a little too quickly. That the side of her she hadn’t really told anyone about was, for a split second, visible. But Teresa didn’t say anything, like she didn’t hear Y/N, and only snickered as she walked out the door. Y/N clutched hard at the straps of her burgundy Fjällräven rucksack, not really know what to make of Teresa’s comment. Though, as she stepped out into the hallway, students standing outside waiting for their lecture to begin, Y/N tried to make herself forget it. Teresa probably meant nothing by it. She didn’t know. How could she? No. No one but Y/N knew. She was safe. Y/N followed Teresa’s messy blonde hair until they reached the big foyer of the Antonin Artaud Building, the same one she had walked into on her first day, her father by her side. Y/N waved bye to Teresa, watching her leave through the door and into the grey afternoon.

“Y/N.” Finn smiled, walking with a mate beside him… That Y/N instantly recognised. “You remember Harry, yea? From Spoons three weeks ago?”

She did. Very much so. She stopped walking when Finn and Harry did as well. “Yea, I do.” Y/N said, looking over at Harry for a split second before looking away. He was wearing a grey turtleneck tucked into a pair of black trousers, a black coat on him as well as black boots and, Y/N realised to a small shock, a metal chain hanging from the hoops in his trousers. The same kind people used in mid-00’s, though this one was silver and very polished, almost glimmering in the light of the lamps above. She hated how she saw all of this in a mere second.

“Cool, because he’s going to wait around for me till I’m done with Ensemble in two hours. We’re going to the library together to study after this. You’re waiting for Tiana, yea?”

Y/N nodded her head once.

“Not saying you two should hang out, but,” Finn shrugged. “You might as well. See ya both later.”

And then he was off, acting like he hadn’t seen what Harry and Y/N had been like together at Spoons three weeks ago. Y/N hadn’t seen Harry around at uni before today, though she had occasionally heard him hang out with Finn and someone else she didn’t know who was, in his room. They were all unapologetically loud, and Y/N didn’t want to be a party pooper, so she never told them when it got annoying and when they should keep it down. She always let Tiana message the Flat 34 groupchat, seeing as she had the most balls to.

Now, standing in the foyer that was starting to clear out, with Harry right before her. Y/N didn’t really know what to do. So, she looked at him, only to meet his gaze and notice he was wearing a pair of silver aviator glasses, a lock of his curls falling a little awkwardly in front of his right eye. Gracefully, he drew a hand through his hair, eyes fully on Y/N. Clearing her throat, she gave him a small smile.

“Well, I guess we both don’t want this.”

Harry furrowed his brows. “This being what exactly?”

“Us hanging out.”

“Ah.” Harry nodded, shoving his hands into the pockets of his trousers, showing off his lean and tall frame. “I guess we don’t, no.”

“So,” Y/N started, taking a step toward the exit. “Bye.”

Harry didn’t respond, and Y/N turned on her toes and walked straight for the door, opening it to the brisk late-October air. She wore a navy green puffer Y/Net over a mustard ribbed knit jumper, a pair of light denim jeans and her usual black vans. Grey clouds dotted the skies above as Y/N made her way to the nearest Costa for a coffee. The sun would occasionally shine through a slit between two flecks of grey, beams of yellow dancing along London before it disappeared again. The Costa wasn’t far away, and when Y/N saw the burgundy sign, she sighed to herself and walked in, opening her puffer Y/Net.

A part of her still wasn’t used to the loud buzzing of London, to constant sounds around her, but she was trying to get accustomed to it. Though Y/N hated change, she knew that for her life to move forward, for her to grow, she needed change. But she bloody hated it nonetheless. The Costa was full, a small group or a single person sitting and enjoying their coffees on every table, loud laughter and voices all around. Standing in the queue, Y/N glanced up at the menu behind the disk, the people before her waiting for their turn. In Hawkley, she had always enjoyed normal black coffee, liking how the bitterness of it both woke her up and calmed her down at the same time. It stung at the back of her lips, the taste of coffee, but it was a stinging Y/N always welcomed. She loved the taste of it. But she needed to broaden her horizon. So, studying the different kinds of coffees on the board, Y/N bit her bottom lip as she tried to decide on which one she wanted to order.

“Following me, are you?”

Y/N whipped her head to her left only to find a staring Harry beside her, looking very smug. And Y/N hated that.

“Wouldn’t it be the other way around?” She asked. “I arrived before you.”

“And how would you know that?”

Y/N narrowed her eyes. “Because I’m standing before you in the queue?”

Harry shrugged his shoulders. “Might just have arrived before you but gone to the loo.”

“Highly doubt that.”

“Oh?” Harry looked amused as he took his glasses off his nose and placed them at the top of his head instead.

“Yes, I left campus before you!”

“Hm, that’s weird.”

“It’s really not-“

“-Hi, can I take your order?”

Y/N looked at the barista, but not for long, as a broad-shouldered creature wearing a black coat and hair all curly, stepped in front of her. For a second, Y/N was momentarily stunned. He had just stepped before her and totally not cared about the fact that it wasn’t his turn. Y/N’s mouth fell open.

“Two medium expresso macchiatos to go, please.” Harry said, pointing at the board behind the barista.

Too shocked to even step beside Harry and tell the barista that it was her turn and not this… this… this git’s, Y/N just stood there. Harry looked over his shoulder at her, giving her a little smile.

“I took the liberty of ordering for you, if that’s okay.”

Y/N shook her head twice, blinking as she realised what Harry had done. “I-I…” She inhaled sharply. “I didn’t even want an expresso macchiato.”

Harry raised his eyebrows, looking at the board as the barista asked which way he’d like to pay. “What were you going to order, then?”

“A-A black coffee.” Y/N answered, crossing her arms and walking to stand beside Harry.

“Have you tried an expresso macchiato before, Y/N?”

She hated the way he said her name. All soft and delicate, like saying her name was a privilege. When his pink lips formed it and puckered a little, like kissing the air around him… No! What?! Y/N looked away from him and at the barista, who seemed very confused at the situation they were finding themselves in.

Y/N shook her head in response, eyes on the board.

“Two expresso macchiatos still, please. I’ll pay by card if that’s alright.” Harry lightly pushed Y/N aside to get to the card machine, to which she instantly grew annoyed with him again.

“No need to push me, dimwit.”

“I didn’t push you, that was borderline touching.” Harry said while clicking in his credit card number into the machine. “Besides,” he took his card out, putting it in his wallet and smiling that lopsided smile of his right at Y/N. “You were in the way of me paying for you.”

Y/N huffed, walking off to the place where everyone waited for their orders, Harry following her. He coughed into his elbow and looked around the big Costa, trying to spot someone he knew no doubt.

“Thank you.” Y/N said lowly, crossing her arms again. “For the coffee.”

Harry looked down at her, eyebrows raised and about to smile again when he turned his body in her direction. “I simply made it to the cashier before you did. A bit slow in the afternoons, are you?”

Y/N frowned.

“I won.” Harry said, letting his tongue fall slowly from the roof of his mouth and back down again, head cocked as the left side of his mouth tipped up again.

“You… won?” Y/N was lost.

“Yea.” Harry said, tucking his hands into the pockets of his jeans and shifting the weight from his right to his left foot. “I was faster.”

“At paying?”

“In life.” Harry sighed exasperatingly, looking triumphant. “In general. At everything. I am faster.”

Y/N couldn’t help her small smile. She had no idea what Harry was on about, no idea why she found it all so amusing. Pushing away from the wooden fence that separated the walkway of the café from the seating area, Y/N positioned herself before him, her back facing the counter.

“Next time, maybe inform me of this contest of being fastest.”

“Oh, darling, it’s not about being faster.” Harry said, putting his glasses back on his nose as he looked at her. “It’s about winning.”

“So, it doesn’t have to be about being fast?”

“No, just win.”

“Elaborate.”

“Okay, how about this?” Harry said, leaning against the railing himself now, gesturing with his hands as he talked. “It’s all about coming out on top. Doing the most and being the best at it.”

“Hmm.” Y/N hummed, biting her lip. She swore Harry’s eyes fell to them for a slight second before he looked into her eyes again. “Didn’t know you were just as competitive as me, Mr…?”

“Styles.” Harry smiled, showing off a set of perfectly straight and white teeth. “Miss…?”

“Winning-at-life.”

Harry chuckled, eyes falling to his boots. “Might have to change that name soon.”

“Because you’re going to be better than me?”

“You said it, not me.” Harry looked up at her again, shrugging his broad shoulders.

“You’ll never win at life or anything.”

“I just did.” Harry said, motioning with his chin toward the cashier. “Just now.”

Y/N was about to reply, try to hold the conversation going, but the reason she had positioned herself where she had was suddenly called out: “Two expresso macchiatos to go!” Whipping around, Y/N walked toward the counter just as Harry pushed away from the railing, but stopped himself as he saw Y/N reaching the coffees first. Holding them both with a huge smile on her face, she handed on to Harry as she reached him and took a slow sip of her own.

“Minx.” Harry muttered. “Nice positioning.”

Y/N smiled. “1 – 1.”

Harry smiled back, sipping the coffee, Y/N did the same. It was very strong, just like her usual black coffee, and for that reason, Y/N found herself enjoying it. She missed the coffee she was able to make at home in the mornings before college and working on the farm during weekends, but this was a close second. It woke her up, all her senses heightened, and all the while, it gave her a taste of peace. Like taking the little boat in her father’s shed, rowing into the middle of the lake on a warm summer’s day and reading a book; that kind of calm. Closing her eyes, she let the familiar feeling of coffee fill her senses, and she let out a content sigh before looking at the cup in her hands.

“You like it?” Harry asked, holding the cup in his right hand while the other rested in his pocket.

Y/N nodded, sipping it again.

“2 – 1 then.” Harry grinned. “I’m in the lead again.”

Y/N blinked, and Harry, who was finding all of this very entertaining it seemed, couldn’t help but laugh again. It was a boyish laugh, not matching the deep timbre of his voice, a contrast Y/N hadn’t seen coming. He had always been so serious the times they had met before, but this version of him – the joking around, competitive, glasses-wearing one – seemed to be quite the opposite of all of that. She did not want to stand around and think more about Harry and all the ways he was different from what she had originally pictured him as. So, instead she motioned with her thumb toward the exit.

“I’m off, I’ll see you at pres or something, I guess.” Y/N started walking away. “Thanks for the coffee again.”

She turned around and started walking up toward Albert Bridge. Sipping her coffee, she tried not to let the few moments she had just shared with Harry get to her. It wasn’t of much significance and no matter how charming he had been, he had also been able to push all the right buttons to aggravate her. So, instead, Y/N looked around as she walked toward the bridge, knowing that 40 minutes she had left till Tiana was done would go by quick if she just strolled around for a bit. She had been to Albert Bridge before, the bridge connecting Battersea to Chelsea, and thought it was a very underappreciated view of London. It wasn’t much; you could see boats driving by, the distant monument hidden away in the fog, and hear someone play the accordion further down the bridge. But for some reason, Y/N liked walking there, just because it wasn’t crowded. London was always a huge buzz, but it seemed to dim down when the wind hit her ears and with less people around as she walked the bridge.

As she reached the bridge, she heard someone clear their throat behind her. And, of course, looking over her shoulder, there was Harry.

“Following me again, ey?”

Y/N stopped walking. “You are the one following me.”

Harry only sipped his coffee, walking past Y/N, not saying a word.

“Hey!” Y/N jogged up to him, making sure not to spill the coffee. “Why are you following me?”

“I’m not.”

“Yes, you are. You’re here, aren’t you? Following me?”

Harry snickered shaking his head. “See that flat building?” He asked, stopping by the railing of the bridge and pointing across the canal to a brown bricked house. Y/N glanced in the direction of his finger, nodding as she saw the fancy building with huge windows, obviously holding wealthy inhabitants. Harry looked down at her, his breath tickling her ear. “My uncle lives there.”

Y/N gulped at the contact Harry’s breath did with her skin, like small puffs of an unexpected tropical wind. She sipper her coffee quickly.

Harry leaned in, mumbling. “On my way to his, if you don’t mind.”

Y/N stepped away, back hitting the railing, and some coffee spilling over her fingers. Harry’s eyes fell to her hand before he smiled up at her, sipping his own coffee.

“Do you?”

“Mind?”

“Yea?”

“I don’t.”

“Good.” Harry smiled. “See you around, Y/N.”

And he walked off, hair blowing in the wind and steps determined. Quickly, Y/N looked toward the flat building and then at Harry strolling away, and then she turned back to walk to uni. For some reason, walking after Harry on the bridge, seemed to me too much.

Friday, 31 October 2014

“You sure you want to be a vampire?” Tiana groaned, holding the face paint in her hand as she looked down at Y/N sitting on her bed. “It’s, like, the most basic and boring Halloween costume ever.”

“You’re dressing up as a slutty nurse!”

Tiana didn’t answer to that, and Y/N assumed it was because she was right; they were both being very basic for this Halloween party. Annie stood by Tiana’s sink, putting make-up on, and Becky was sitting by her desk, using a mirror she had brought down from her room. All the girls were getting ready together, chuffed to finally be going to a house party together. No one knew how Finn had been able to get them into the party in Chelsea, but he had told them not to ask questions, so no one had.

“Some things are better left a mystery, boys.” He had said one afternoon, eating his microwaveable Toad in a Hole and grinning from ear to ear.

Y/N had just thrown on a black turtleneck and some black jeans, not really in the mood to go all out with her costume. While both Tiana and Becky had gone shopping for their slutty nurse and slutty cat, and Y/N knew they would both look absolutely amazing. Annie was going to go as Sally from Nightmare Before Christmas, and as far as her make-up went, she was already looking great. With music in the background and their mind set on having a great night together, the girls all did their make-up and psyched each other up for a night of nothing but greatness.

Once everyone was ready, they waited in the kitchen for the boys to be ready, which took surprisingly long. But Ian, Spencer and Finn all came out into the kitchen dressed up as characters from a show on the telly Y/N did not know of and did not care to know the name of either. Together, flat 34 of Westbridge walked toward Chelsea together, a 2 litre Pepsi bottle containing vodka and blackcurrant squash to share between the seven of them. Tiana had an extra bottle of vodka in her purse, so the little squad was all set for the party. Finn didn’t elaborate on how he had gotten everyone a pass into this exclusive house party, but one everyone was starting to feel the effect of the bottle passing between them, no one cared enough to answer. They were all dressed up and ready to party, and besides that and a good time, no one cared for any other news.

Finn knocked on the door and said the supposed password – Y/N was very impressed that a uni party needed a password for entrance – and the guard let everyone in while counting each of them. Finn let out a howl in triumph, clapping his hands above his head and looking at everyone before he exclaimed: “Let’s party, gang!”

And with that, everyone spread out. Y/N followed Becky who needed to go to the loo, and both Tiana and Annie did the same. Locking themselves in there, Becky sat down to pee and let out a huge sigh.

“Can any of you lot tell me when you see Harry Styles tonight?” She asked, adjusting her cat ears.

“Why?” Tiana asked, looking at herself in the mirror to make sure her make-up was fine.

“Because I really want to shag him.” She said, sighing again. “He’s so bloody peng.”

“You wanna have sex with him here? At this party?” Annie raises her eyebrows, clearly a little shocked.

“Why not?” Becky shrugged. “As long as I get the opportunity, yea?”

Tiana giggled. “I loved helping my friends get dick. I’ll tell you the minute I see him.”

“Thanks, Ti.” Becky smiled, flushing the toilet and walking over to wash her hands. “I told you, didn’t I, Y/N? How I delicious I think he is?”

Y/N only nodded, running a hand through her hair.

“I could suck his prick right off.” Becky said, drying her hands and applying some more lipstick. “Anyway, thank you girls, for helping me out.”

“Always a privilege to help a friend in need.” Tiana said smiling, and Becky opened the door for them so they could leave. Annie and Y/N followed, neither really knowing what to say as the situation of helping a friend get laid hadn’t really presented itself to either of them before. Regardless, Y/N quickly forgot about it and everyone walked onto the dancefloor together. The bass shook of Y/N’s heartbeat, and the music was so loud that it was hard to hear anything but one’s own thoughts, and even that proved to be a challenge. But Y/N danced her tipsy little heart out, and suddenly forgot all about everything but the song that was playing, the people she was with, and the feeling of her body moving along to the beat.

Tiana took Y/N’s hand, and the two friends started dancing together like drunk friends do. Y/N threw her head back in euphoria, laughter erupting from her mouth, and Tiana threw an arm around Y/Ni’s shoulders, holding onto her new best friend while she belted out the lyrics to the song that was playing at the top of her lungs. Y/N held onto Tiana and grinned at Annie when she saw her dancing, and within their drunk minds, a world outside this exact moment, didn’t exist.

Y/N suddenly excused herself, saying she wanted some more to drink, and Tiana drew the vodka bottle out of her purse and gave it to her flatmate. Holding it to her chest, Y/N walked toward the kitchen, smiling at people she bumped into on the way and humming along to the song even though she did not have a clue as to what song it was. With her eyes halfway closed and a smile on her face, Y/N entered the kitchen, the light the only ceiling one that was on. She found a plastic cup on the counter and brought it to the kitchen island where everyone had put their drinks away on. The flat hadn’t brought anything to mix the vodka with, which left Y/N with only two possible options: (1) she could steal some from the kitchen island, or (2) water. From Tiana, Y/N had heard horror stories about the taste of vodka and water together, and how badly it had ended for her a couple of times. It was for that reason, and just plainly trusting Tiana’s judgment and stories, that Y/N opened the vodka bottle with the intent to steal something to mix it with from someone else.

Pouring herself something to drink from the bottle, Y/N didn’t notice the figure in the doorway into the kitchen. Tipsy as she was, she would never have done this if she was sober, Y/N reached for a pink lemonade standing in the middle of the kitchen island, and opened it, blending it with the alcohol. She continued to hum to herself, screwing the cork back on the pink lemonade, and tried to take a sip of the drink. Coughing, Y/N opened the pink lemonade again and mixed it some more, frowning to herself when she sipped it a second time, but nodding to herself when it was better than the first try. The figure that had been standing watching her walked into the kitchen, slight paint on his face and an amused smile on his lips. Y/N took another sip when he came into her field of vision, and she froze, gulping down her alcohol as he took her in.

The white vampire teeth painted at the corners of her lip, the blood running down from one side, and the slight eye make-up, made her seem a little deader, but Harry didn’t seem to even acknowledge that she was wearing make-up.

“You lot arrived fucking late.” Harry said, sipping his cup as Y/N put hers on the table.

“Yea, the boys took long to get ready.”

Harry huffed. “Fucking guessed it.” He said. “Finn loves making an entrance, doesn’t he?”

“Yea, I guess he does.” Y/N agreed, looking back into the pit of people dancing to see if she saw any sign of Tiana. Harry took this moment to look at her, a kind of seriousness to his gaze that he hadn’t had before. He walked a bit closer so it’d be easier for them to talk. It was then that Y/N noticed he had come here dressed as a werewolf. Well, not dressed as one, but his face paint clearly exposed him as a werewolf. It was faint paint, not a dominating brown that ran along his cheeks and forehead and nose, but enough so you’d guess his costume from afar.

“You never say it.”

“Say what?”

“Fuck.” Harry said, voice lower as he took another step closer. “I’ve never heard you say it.”

Y/N just looked at him. “And that’s a problem for you?”

The right side of his mouth tipped upward. “Don’t know. You don’t like it?”

Y/N only looked at him, not really knowing what to say.

Harry leaned in, dangerously close, closer than they had ever been before. “Because it’s my favourite word.”

Y/N swallowed, willing herself not to look anywhere but his eyes.

“You can…” His smile grew wider. “Do so much with it.” He said, voice like a caress as he said, letting his bottom lip fall from behind his top teeth all moist and pink, “Fuck.”

Y/N felt her heart pick up speed. “Oh?”

“Yea.” Harry nodded. “A word with so many meanings. So many ways.”

The exhale leaving her lips was audible, making Harry’s lips twitch into a smile.

“You can cuss someone out, or do them-“

Y/N put her hand up, stopping her mid-sentence. Again, she was almost happy she was drunk and had the balls to do stuff she’d never do sober. He was being… way too handsome and way too close to her not to react like this. He couldn’t be this close or she didn’t know what drunk Y/N would do.

“Why is it your favourite word? It’s so vulgar.”

Harry smiled, looking so handsome that Y/N didn’t properly know what to do with herself.

“It’s my favourite verb, darling.”

Y/N was stunned, and she hated herself for melting a little at the sound of ‘darling’ leaving his lips, because the way he said it made her all giggly. She hated that he had this effect on her. Hated it. Because she hated him. Or no, she didn’t hate him, but he was so annoying, especially when he made her want him to kiss her.

“I-I…” She cleared her throat, taking her cup in one hand and the vodka bottle in the other and gave Harry a very awkward smile. “I-I need to go find Tiana.”

Harry cocked his head at her, licking his lip again as he saw her stress in a way that made her a little cute. She seemed distressed, like she didn’t really know what to do with herself, but not because she was uncomfortable, but rather because she didn’t want to be this close to him or something might actually happen. Harry wasn’t going to lie, he found Y/N very attractive, and the more time he spent around her, teasing her and making him work for it, he knew that there was no way he’d ever really be done unless something happened. But it didn’t seem Y/N wanted to. Well, at least not now. She took another step away from him, giving him a tight smile before walking off. He watched her leave, her face when he had said ‘fuck’ etched into his mind, and sipping his drink, he knew it would be a very long while until he forgot about that.

Y/N found her friends again, giving the bottle back to Tiana and sipping her drink. She passed it around the little group of girls, everyone taking a sip, and tried for forget about the incident in the kitchen just now. Swallowing the rest of the vodka, Y/N started smiling and dancing again. She didn’t see Harry the rest of that night. She spent it dancing with her flatmates, holding Tiana’s hair back once they reached heir flat, and humming a song she had been dancing to in bed until she fell asleep.

TAGLIST

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[benisasoftboi]

So on Friday night I made this post:

Which I expected that maybe ten, twenty people would see? I didn’t think anyone would really care about a joke about something so old and obscure, and it would just get lost in all the Detective Pikachu stuff. Instead, within five hours, it had become my most popular post. 

I know it’s still not a huge number, but it’s still way more attention than I’ve ever received for anything... ever, so I’ve been thinking about Pokemon Live a lot since. Which has been bad, because this morning I had to take a very important political economy exam, and instead of thinking about Bretton Woods or Marx, I was thinking about Pokemon. I nearly referred to my country’s former Prime Minister as ‘David Camerupt’. It wasn’t good. 

I need to expunge my thoughts. Specifically, my thoughts on one topic in particular - the way this show treats, or rather mistreats, the character of James. Because I truly, truly love Pokemon Live. I do. It’s one of the most glorious dumpster fires I’ve ever had the pleasure of watching a poor quality recording of. But this is the one thing I definitely don’t love.

I don’t expect anyone to read this. I mean, I said that last time, but this time I really don’t. It’s a long essay on a niche topic, and it isn’t even funny. But on the off chance it’ll get you to stick with me, I promise that there will be pictures of Andrew Rannells cuddling puppies at the end. 

So,

How Pokemon Live Mistreats James, and Why It Matters:

The Mandatory Mentioning of The Actor

I’m guessing anyone who knows anything about Pokemon Live also knows that now highly successful, Tony-nominated Broadway and television actor Andrew Rannells was in it playing James. And if you didn’t, now you know why I’ve mentioned him twice now. I’m a big fan of this guy.

He hated this role. Absolutely despised it. Apparently the show was a miserable environment to work in for everyone. The costumes were uncomfortable. The audiences were unbearable. There’s a making of for this show, which can be viewed on YouTube in its entirety - I’ve watched the whole thing more than once and you can see in every cast member’s eyes - there’s no light there. They’re all dead inside. It’s almost heartbreaking.  

To be clear - he’s the only one of these people I, or anyone else I’ve seen, ever makes fun of for this show. And that’s because he’s fine. He’s fine! He’s done very well for himself and talking about it won’t hurt his career, and there’s just always something really hilarious about seeing very successful people in terrible things, isn’t there? Chris Hemsworth in Saddle Club, Zach Braff in Babysitter’s Club, literally everyone in Foodfight. It’s not malicious or in any way intended to be punching down - just poking fun at a really good actor’s really bad early work. It’s not even really making fun of him, more that he was in this.

But there is one reason he hated the role that I don’t find so funny, and that’s that he felt the people that wrote the thing had made James a grossly over-the-top, borderline-to-over-the-line (depending on your tolerance) homophobic stereotype. And... yeah. They undeniably did that.  

Rannells understandably dislikes the character, and to be honest - that makes me a little sad. Knowing that musical!James is probably the only version of the character he (and likely a lot of parents who saw the show, and other cast members) ever really encountered, that’s a huge shame. Because if we go back to the anime the musical’s based on, the one I, and many others, grew up on, James is quite different. In fact, I personally consider anime!James to be the best character in the entire Pokemon franchise.

Why We Love Team Rocket 

Just want to quickly note that I can only discuss the anime up to about halfway through the Sinnoh seasons - I’ve seen basically nothing after that. My childhood was some original series, a lot of Hoenn, and a fair bit of early Sinnoh (somehow skipped over Johto almost entirely, don’t really know how that happened). If any of this is now not accurate, well - it’s not really relevant for this discussion anyway, but I still apologise. 

The Team Rocket trio, James especially, is, pretty queer-coded. This is not unusual for villainous characters in children’s media before the 2010s, so much so that I would guess that a lot of the time it wasn’t even being done deliberately - it was just that common a trope that it was all but expected your show would have at least one flamboyantly effeminate, villainous bloke. And James - especially early James - has no qualms about showing his feminine side:

Notice that Jessie adopts masculine attire to match - she doesn’t always do this, but I like that they have her at least do it sometimes. 

Team Rocket’s disguises became less and less likely to involve cross dressing as the show went on, but it’s one of the things best remembered about them. James also has a strong association with roses, and possesses several other feminine mannerisms. Arguably he’s far more downplayed than most other villains of the type (even more so than others present in Pokemon - Harley’s a great example, who was also, coincidentally, played by Andrew Rannells), but it’s present. And while yes, obviously in real life none of those things should be taken as definitive indication of a person’s orientation, and straight men are perfectly capable of twirling around in pretty dresses - in fact, I fully endorse it - this is fiction. Specifically fiction from the early 2000s. And in fiction, certain things are intended as visual cues and shorthand.

So I really, really doubt we were supposed to think James is entirely straight (I personally have always thought that he’s actually bi, but I’m not opposed to alternatives). You could make the case, but like. Come on.

But how is this different from musical!James? And how is this different than any other villain like him? Very simple. Anime!James has depth.

Not a tremendous amount. It’s a children’s cartoon made to cash in on a popular video game. But he, and Jessie and Meowth, are among the most well-rounded characters in the show’s cast, in a way that’s actually very relatable. It helps that they aren’t actually very villainous people most of the time. I know so many people who grew up with the show that loved, rooted for, and identified with them over the actual protagonists, by a mile. Myself included - I can remember two separate James-centered episodes that made me cry as a kid.

And these three are particularly beloved by young LGBT adults. We know from their backstories that they all came from rough circumstances - Jessie desperately poor and struggling to get anywhere or be recognised, Meowth having changed a fundamental part of himself in attempt to gain love and instead being ostracised for it, and James running away from an abusive household. They’re three people (/Pokemon) who felt alone in the world, that have now found each other. And whether you view Jessie and James’s relationship as romantic, friendship, or found family, it’s far more compelling than any other relationship in the show, at least to me. They may be criminals, but it’s not hard to see why some kids - especially the kids who might already feel like they’re just a bit different - would latch on to them. 

Even if you didn’t know James’s backstory, he still has a character. He’s frequently shown to be the most moral of the trio, he has a stronger bond with Pokemon than honestly even Ash - even more of a running gag than his flamboyance is the fact that his pets love him so much that they just wanna hug him all the time, with inevitable slapstick consequences - he has dorky hobbies like bottle cap collecting, and he’s even occasionally shown to be a bit of an environmentalist. Yes he is in many ways a stereotypical camp villain - but he’s also more. And that’s why we love him. 

And I’d bet anything there probably were some little boys who watched the show and saw James and thought ‘that guy’s like me!’. And yeah, that guy is a villain, because god forbid a maybe-gay character also be a good guy. But more than any other character like him that I’ve seen, he’s also always been a person. And considering how most of the other options kids like that had at the time were either one-note villains or nothing (and even now it’s sparse pickings) - that’s valuable.

And then there’s Pokemon Live.

*long, long sigh*

Oh, Pokemon Live. You beautiful disaster. 

What did you do to my boy?

Is there nothing that better encapsulates it than the bit where James asks Giovanni where Mecha MewTwo (...I know) “stands on campaign finance reform, social security and Don’t Ask Don’t Tell”?

First off, I like that James is politically engaged! Good for him! Completely out of character, but still!

And I do find this line incredibly funny, but I want to be very clear about why I find it funny. The line is funny because referencing a real world American discriminatory military policy in a Pokemon musical is just... so completely absurd. It’s super jarring and when I first watched it, I had to pause it so I could stop laughing about the possible implications of Pokemon Don’t Ask Don’t Tell. Is there a Pokemon American military then? Pokemon Democrats and Pokemon Republicans? Pokemon Bill Clinton? POKEMONICA LEWINSKY???

It just raises so many questions.

Also Rannells’s delivery is incredible.

But the thing is, that’s not the joke here, is it? The actual ‘joke’ is ‘HA HA HE’S GAY! HE SAID THAT BECAUSE HE’S GAY!’. Which gets even worse when you think about it and realise that this situation is really just a gay man (I don’t think there’s any doubt about it in this particular incarnation, is there) asking his boss whether or not he thinks people like him should be discriminated against. How is that a joke? (The answer is that it isn’t.)

Which makes it that much more inappropriate for a children’s Pokemon musical, which is sort of, in a dark way, almost funnier. It’s that juxtaposition of something kiddy and cute with something that definitely isn’t. 

But hilarious as I find it, given the chance to I would go back and get rid of that line. I dislike what it implies - that being a gay man is nothing more than a punchline - more than I like the absurdist humour. 

And that’s the whole problem with how they chose to write James for this whole thing. They took a really good example of how you can have this type of villain while also making him a good character, and they turned him into nothing more than a stereotype.

You could say ‘but it’s a much shorter story than a TV show! They wouldn’t have time to make him nuanced!’, to which I would say 1. He doesn’t have to be nuanced, he just has to be slightly more than I’M GAY and 2. There have been 21 Pokemon movies at time of writing, two of which came out before Pokemon Live did. None of them, at least of the ones I’ve seen, committed any character assassinations like this. The first one even had another baffling reference to real world America:

That’s so out of nowhere and silly that I laugh every time I think about it (the Minnesota Vikings are an American football team, if you didn’t know). See, Pokemon Live! It’s possible to do jokes like that which aren’t at the expense of a minority group! Wow!

The anime even has examples of how you can do the gay jokes and make them funny. They are very rare in the show (beyond the humour of James’s personality), but remember the whole Flaming Moltres joke? It’s actually great. It’s a couple of good puns, it’s possibly Rachael Lillis’s best delivery in the whole show, and, just for confirmation, I’ve shown the clip to a few actual gay men in my life, who all said that they think that it’s very funny, and totally non-offensive. The joke is still ‘lol he gay’, but it’s also a neat play on words, it feels very in character for both of them, and it doesn’t have the same malicious, taunt-y feel of the Pokemon Live ‘joke’.

Look, the Pokemon anime is far from perfect. There are lots of moments where you have to grit your teeth and remember when it came out. But it still gave us a really, really wonderful character, and he absolutely deserved better than this.

Do I Still Love Pokemon Live?

Yes.

Even with all of this, it’s still an absolute masterpiece of unintentional hilarity. In some ways, this makes it funnier. Of course, of course, it couldn’t just have terrible costumes and a nonsense plot and really, really bad rapping - of course it’s also kind of offensive. Of course it is. Why wouldn’t it be.

And I would love to talk about all the things I genuinely love about it, and maybe I will one day.

But the thing is, it’s also representative of everything that was wrong with gay-coded characters at the time, something that the show it’s based on came way closer to handling well than most other stuff of its time, no less. And that, as a whole, isn’t funny at all.

So I want to be clear. I love laughing at this show because it’s a weirdly earnest cash-in musical for something that definitely shouldn’t be a musical, with endless bizarre, quotable moments - not because the way it warped this character is actually funny. I love laughing at the character’s lines because they’re absurd choices for a Pokemon musical - not because they’re in any way funny on their own. And I love laughing at the fact that Andrew Rannells was in it because he is so much better than this - not because this is what I think he should be reduced to.

And speaking of, here’s those pictures I promised:

I love one man.

[whumpingwithirondad]

Tony is so-not a Dad

Do you want to see more posts like this? Comment down below!

So, this began when we were talking what we like and don’t like about fics. I could not cut this into parts so yeah, this is a bit long :D 

wordscorrupt

I love Peter calling tony mister stark or sir I don’t know I don’t try to get him to call him dad unless some requests it. There’s just something so endearing about it lol and I love the way he says it in the movies it’s adorable

irondadgroupie

Yes! I think Mr Stark is kind of an endearing nickname and usually when people call Tony it, the man is nonchalant but when Peter call him that...the boy has him wrapped around his finger.

I think if Peter thinks of the word Dad, he thinks of his biological father and traces of Ben and Tony. He is so confused so he refuses to call anyone Dad. Plus I think if Peter ever started calling Tony dad, the man would be terrified :D

wordscorrupt

tony's heart skips a few beats from excitement anytime he hears peter say his name. omg tony would be pulling out a cross if peter ever called him dad out of the blue. the only time i could understand is if hes delirious and tony would play along but otherwise tonys calling a priest bc his kid is possessed

irondadgroupie

That is a great idea! Like the enemy knows Tony and Peter are close, he is like a father to the boy so they if there is like a shape shifter as Peter who calls Tony dad, Tony immediately puts the thing into chokehold because his kid does not call him that.

wordscorrupt

omg just the mental image of that. it happens in front of happy or rhodey too and they are like WTF TONY DONT HURT THE BBY

irondadgroupie

But yeah, I like the idea of Peter being out of it, like has a high fever and is barely in the real world, then Tony would be like "Yes, Dad is here, kiddo." And when Peter gets better and hears about it he is so embarrassed.

irondadgroupie

I just had the though that if someone stole Peter's phone and tried to have a conversation with Tony (I don't know, maybe to humiliate Peter) and they wrote the word Dad, Tony is immediately going "Okay, who is this, why do you have my kid's phone?"

wordscorrupt

yesss exactly and tony just never mentions it too. he hears about from bruce or one of the other doctors that took care of him as well

irondadgroupie

Like Tony's motto is: "Yes, he is my kid but I am not his dad"

wordscorrupt

tonys like; yes i take care of him, provide for him, clothe him (too many iron dad pajamas to count), feed him (he eats me out of a house), protect him but im not his dad.

wordscorrupt

peter gets kidnapped by a group of people who think he's tony secret son or something and tony sends a text like "hey bud wondered what you wanted for dinner tonight we're ordering in" and one of the guys texts back "anythings good with me dad" and tony basically fucking smashes through the walls like ten seconds later

irondadgroupie

Yes! And others are like: "Tony, you are such a dad.""I am not, we don't share blood!" Like Tony pays for Peter's school (what the financial aid doesn't cover), makes sure he visits doctor and dentist regularly, keeps his schedule on his phone, buys him new shoes and jackets for winter (he hates Peter's style but the kid likes it so yeah, why not), helps him revise for exams (I can just imagine Tony driving and saying a verb Peter needs to conjugate )

irondadgroupie

Yes! They make sure the style of writing is similar, check few previous messages so they wouldn't be caught, they send the message and are like "yeah, now we can have fun" and ten seconds later a cannon blows up a wall and Tony flies in. "Pretty good job, fellas but you forgot one thing, I am not his dad!"

wordscorrupt

yes! domestic tony is my everything. he definitely pays for peter's school and donates to the programs/clubs that peter is involved in as well. helps him with his college essays and applications. tony got the best doctor and dentist for peter as well and calls in to make his appointments for him. one of tonys favorite pastimes is shopping for clothes for peter online and he always make s sure to throw in one of those dumb science joke shirts everytime. tony making sure that peter is getting his daily nutrition in becuase he was not gonna have the kid pass out on him again because he blood sugar was low.

peters just in the corner, mouth taped shut with duct tape and chained up and he just nods his head like 'duh'

irondadgroupie

Aww! The image of Tony in online shops and occasionally asking Pepper: "You think Peter would like that color?" "Tony, he has like 10 jackets already!" "He could do with a new one, he's a growing boy."

irondadgroupie

I don't think Tony makes the appointments until it is absolutely necessary. Like once Peter complains about neck ache and Tony says: "It might be wisdom tooth, I'll give you a number to a dentist. She works with enhanced individuals." Then he pesters Peter for weeks "Did you make the appointment yet?" But yeah, Peter's mind is like swiss cheese, he never remembers. One day Tony calls him "You have dentist today at 3, I'll pick you up from school." "Mr Stark, I can make my own appointments!" "Yeah, clearly."

wordscorrupt

tony stresses shops but instead of shopping for himself he shops for peter instead

i like to think the reason that peter doesn't make the appointments is because he hates going to the dentist/doctor so he thinks he can just lie about actually going

irondadgroupie

Tony is a trophy!wife inside. He buys Peter vitamins and when he is over, makes sure the boy eats a good breakfast (even if they are running late because you don't fucking skip breakfast!). But yeah, Peter is an idiot and if Tony is not there to remind him, Peter forgets to eat. Once Tony was on a week long business trip and when he came back, Peter fainted into a hug. Like Tony can't even remember how many times he had had to hold Peter's feet up because the boy felt dizzy after a work-out

irondadgroupie

Oh, why is the image of Peter being chained up so adorable? :D He watches as Tony captures the bad guys and then kneels next to him and rips of the tape. "Idiots," Peter calls to the bad guys as Tony just chuckles while working on the chains.

irondadgroupie

And Pepper returns like half the packages that arrive :D Otherwise Peter's room would have no space for the boy

irondadgroupie

Oh yeah, Peter afraid of dentists. Like the boy tries to get out of the appointment claiming he is not feeling well but Tony puts a hand to his forehead and goes "Yeah, sorry, kiddo, you are going." And then Tony guesses what the problem is "I hate dentists too. In my days, they were terrible, not gentle at all, left me with some deep rooted fears. But this lady is so nice and patient and if you are a good boy, she will give you a candy bar after you are done."

wordscorrupt

yes vitamins and protein shakes and everything else to keep peter from passing out every five minutes. loads his backpack with all kinds of snacks to keep him going throughout the day at school. oh my god the image of peter kind of just fainting into tony's arms when trying to go for a hug instead and tony just grabbing him like its not big deal. he knew the kid was going to forget about keeping his diet up.

wordscorrupt

pepper lets tony have the fun then has to return half the things for sure and tony buys so much he doesn't even remmember what he actually all got so he never catches on

wordscorrupt

peter just grumbles as tony bribes him into going to the dentist. thats the one thing tony is not above. he gets that peter hates going and tony doesn't blame him at all but he has to get the kid there one way or another

wordscorrupt

its great that the doctor tony chooses for him works at the compound which makes the most sense. peter is a terrible patient when he's sick or injured, trying to fight off the doctor and attach himself to tony instead. hes probably more terrible when he's alert and forced to go down for a checkup and just grumbling the entire time and glaring at tony for making him do this in the first place

irondadgroupie

Yeah, Tony orders a bunch of all kind of protein products, there are cardboard boxes of them in nearly every room, even in bathroom because one time Peter fainted when getting out of the bath and had Tony not heard the splash, the boy most certainly would have drowned.

irondadgroupie

Tony catches Peter like: "Wow, wow, buddy, let's get you lying down." And he sets the kid on the floor and pats his face while Pepper gets fruit juice. Yeah, opening the packages is like second Christmas. Tony is always surprised what he ordered :D I also think Tony spends time on online auctions, getting movie memorabilia and such for his boy

irondadgroupie

AWW Peter pouting and looking so adorable Tony takes a million pictures. The dentist is very understanding and explains beforehand each procedure. But Peter still grips the handles of the chair because he is nervous.

"You are doing so well, sweetie," the woman says and Peter relaxes a bit. "You have beautiful teeth, they need just a little cleaning up."

wordscorrupt

Peter nearly tears the leather from the chair from gripping it to hard. Tony eventually reaches out to hold one of his hands and Peter instantly relaxes

he thinks he's in the clear once his cleaning is done and he's helped up from the chair until the dentist says they need to talk about his x-rays and how it looks like his wisdom teeth are impacted

irondadgroupie

"Helped up from the chair" makes it sound like Peter suffered from a dizzy spell and had to lay down for a while. Happened to me after my wisdom teeth operation :D In Finland, we don't get anesthesia when taking out wisdom teeth (unless the person has severe fear or the operation is large), it's just pain killers and numbing the area with drugs

"It's so embarrassing," Peter muttered as he accepted the cup of water Tony offered.

irondadgroupie

I think Peter would be doing a stress test and the heart monitor goes crazy with something abnormal and the boy just collapses. Maybe his heart starts beating too fast and they have to use cardioversion

wordscorrupt

Oh man he’s terrified the entire time not knowing what’s going on. Is he dying??

irondadgroupie

Or maybe they are sparring and suddenly Peter gets out of breath and grabs his chest and collapses on the ground.

Tony is certain he killed the boy

wordscorrupt

Tony’s thinking Peter just fainted from stress but then why would he grab his chest. He’s asking Friday if 15 year olds can have heart attack’s at the same time he’s racing to the medbay with Peter in his arms

irondadgroupie

Just think of the surgery day, Tony might be more nervous than Peter because they need to stop the kid's heart to repair it

"Don't worry, I'll be okay," Peter tells him and May with a brave smile.

irondadgroupie

Yeah, Peter fainting from stress is common because he tended to run himself down. Tony had gotten very skilled in reviving the kid, usually pouring cold water on his face was enough. But now he debated whether chest compression were needed.

irondadgroupie

You know, one idea has been flying in my head. Peter's blood sugar dropping dangerously low that Tony has to feed him jam or something with lots of sugar to bring him back around. Like Peter would lie on his lap and Tony had to feed him the stuff with a spoon. Like with a diabetic patient, he rubs the jam to the boy's mouth, gums and under his tongue

wordscorrupt

oh lord tony thinking about the fact that peter could technically be dead while in the operating room. lets not even mention post surgery, where peter has a long scar down  his chest and has about a million tubes coming from his chest. ive seen patients in the cardiac icu and its freaking ridiculous how many machines and lines they are hooked up to.

yes tony trying to hold peter up at the same time trying to force (gently!) food down his throat to get his blood sugar back up and peters kind of just out of it

one time peter passes out on stage during a decathalon competition

irondadgroupie

Tony has to practically massage the boy

irondadgroupie

's throat to make him swallow the food and Peter just doesn't answer, just moans or mumbles when Tony shoves another spoonful of jam into his mouth.

Can you imagine Peter's blood sugar dropping during the night and Tony literally can't wake the kid up in the morning.

wordscorrupt

oh my god that would be terrifying. for a second he thinks the kid has died in his sleep but once he kind of gets his mind straight, he checks his pulse and he still has one

tony has to carry around of those machines that checks a persons blood sugar levels

irondadgroupie

Yes! It was during the last question. Tony was watching and he saw the signs that yeah, Peter is going down soon. But he was too far and couldn't get to the stage to catch the boy.

wordscorrupt

the entire audience gasps of course but then imagine their reaction when tony stark of all people is rushing up to the stage. peter hits his head pretty hard on the podium as well and by the time tony gets to him, he's bleeding from his headsterday a

irondadgroupie

Yeah, Peter's alarm went off several times and Tony finally comes to the room. "Kiddo," he shakes his shoulder. "Come on, up you get, you'll be late for school." But Peter just lies on the bed and he is completely limp. Tony nearly has a heart attack when the boy doesn't open his eyes. I can just imagine him starting to shake Peter's shoulders "This isn't funny, kid! Wake up!"

irondadgroupie

Oh, Peter definitely hits his head. Tony immediately kneels beside the boy. "Peter," he taps his face. "Hey, kiddo, wake up!" But the boy doesn't react and Tony take of his jacket to press it against the wound

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Tony rushes peter down To the medbay because while peter still has a pulse he’s not waking up. Bruce is there as tony runs in a wild look on his face

Tony demands that they bring down the curtains on stage to give them privacy and then starts ordering people around one of them to grab any kind of sugary food they can find

irondadgroupie

Bruce takes Peter's blood pressure and checks sugar levels and immediately starts setting an IV. "He is fine, Tony, it's just his metabolism screwing with him again." He gives Peter a shot of glucose (the kind they use to treat diabetes patients or people who have alcohol poisoning) and it doesn't take long until Peter is opening his eyes, still loopy and confused why Tony immediately smothers him into a hug.

irondadgroupie

"Don't worry, he is okay, this happens all the time," Tony says and lifts Peter's eyelid to check his pupils. He quickly checked the boy's neck for possible breaks and when he deems it safe, moves Pete's head a bit so that airways stay open. "He just needs something sugary to drink and eat."

irondadgroupie

"I have this," A girl from the opposing team offered a bag of fruit shaped candy that was coated in sugar. Tony smiled: "That is just perfect." Tony crouches lower and opens the boy's mouth until he can place one piece in there.

irondadgroupie

But honestly, since Peter has a head injury, the more realistic alternative is that they bring a cold compress to hold on his forehead