#i think i am going insane
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sigh
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ok but to be serious for a second
the way silver springs into existence out of nowhere and then continues to exist as needed and in doing so serves as repeat catalyst for forward movement
he isn't a person. he's a device. he's a trope. he's a lie. he's only real as long as he's seen and he's seen as long as i'm watching
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So, I am reading a really old Star Trek fanfiction, 'Star Drek' by Ruth Berman (1968) and, uhm:
The girls are flirting? And another:
McCoy is already fed up with them, after only the first season...
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mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane mesmerizer is making me lose it i think i am going insane
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I believe dressing like a snobbish Victorian gentleman 24/7 could probably fix me
#get me a top hat!#a waistcoat!#suspenders!#a proper suit!#perhaps a bow tie!#oh to be the cruel fiancée of the protagonist’s long lost crush in a classic film…#*bitchass detested rival voice* oh reginald it’s such a shock to see you back in town so soon after that frightful scare the other day…#I surely hope you do not mind that Elouise has been staying at my residence while she recovers#you see a woman of her intelligence and beauty deserves someone who can treat her well- wouldn’t you agree reginald?#I think I am going insane
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I forgot to bring a pencil to school so I’m in the library folding and tearing notebook paper to make little paper stars
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gonna go to my dorm and smoke my aromatherapy vape and read this shitty fucking master’s thesis about our flag means death because i cannot do real drugs
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it's so cute for a guy to be a waiter. like aw, what, you wanna hear what i want so you can go get it for me? you gonna write it down in your little notebook and tuck that away in your little apron? gonna trot off to the kitchen? you wanna play fetch, puppy? chicken sandwich
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i just burst into tears
why is he so sweet i love him i will care for him
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I'm sick af and got into another car accident, some of my teachers told me I look like 'the embodiment of death' BUT THE HUSTLE NEVER STOPS!!!! 1.Work/school 2.Health
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The juxtaposition of a chilling and heart wrenching short story appearing on my dash IMMEDIATELY followed by this.
#even worse I’m in limbo#I just got off my meds and withdrawal is KILLING me#I think I am going insane
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I’m so envious of people who can have crushes easily. I don’t think I’ll ever experience that!
Most of my crushes on celebrities and fictional characters; it’s been in a ‘they’re so much like me!’ or a ‘they’re physically attractive wow.’
I just wanna experience love and be NORMAL! I can’t even pretend to have a crush.
Boys are so GROSS and NASTY! But I wanna kids to be a parent. Someone tell me I’m not alone! I love taking of people, and especially little children… they’re so precious and small.
#rant#ranting#rambles#love#love advice#i think i am going insane#is this normal#someone hit me in my dms
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me: trying to set boundaries with my parents
them: YOU ARE JUST A SPOILED BRAT!!!
#i love it here#haha#i think i am going insane#i just wanted to be left alone for 5 minutes so i could cool down and didn't cause a scene#i wasn't left alone#i caused a scene#currently am petting my dog to cool down#without him i would probably have already lost it
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my blog is a gateway drug to cooler and better blogs (my mutuals)
#my blog is weed and all my mutuals are cocaine#it makes sense to me alright lmao#i get it#i have cool moots#like yes please go follow them#but also i am insane and notice when you dont rb things from me but rb them from the mutual i rbd the post from#lmao#i just dont understand the thinking#why even follow me if you dont want to interact with my blog or posts?#its not that serious#mine
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Got inspired, made something, hope you enjoy.
Pretty accurate if I do say so myself.
#you might be wondering#hey ratbaby#maul is friends with absolutely none of these people???#well i dont care#i wanted to put him here so hes here#move on#also#yes i am infact refering to sabe with padmes if you were wondering#the rest is rather self explanatory#btw its 4:00 in the morning right now i think im actually going insane#star wars#tcw#the clone wars#ahsoka tano#anakin skywalker#obi wan kenobi#captain rex#padme amidala#darth maul#ratbaby thoughts
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spiraling
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#gojo satoru#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#the minute i realized how tg coded the composition n colours were i decided to turn it up to 11#i was racking my brain trying 2 figure out how to get the layered tissue paper look tht i talked abt ishida's cover art having#cycled through all my usual layer modes n nothing ws Quite right#until wouldnt u know it . divide n subtract!!!!! i NEVER use divide or subtract bc theyre impossible#but fr this??? its like they were made for it oh my god#it makes the greys look translucent n all my textures pop in a way that makes them appear splotchy n Bruised#which ws the whole point thts the Look god i am so PLEASED#when the layer modes tht notoriously get No love finally find their niche <33 peace and love <333#filing this away fr later i am going 2 have a lot of fun with this new information i think#im very happy w how the colours look n i dont think anything else wld have kept the right Mood#but i am always so >:/ when i have to use a palette tht forces me into giving megumi blue eyes#had to set aside th green eyed megu agenda fr the Aesthetic unfortunately#anyway i knew from the minute i saw it that i wanted to do smth involving the opening panel of 268#bc that panel is S tier#i figured tht if nothing came 2 me i wld just redraw it as-is bc it's alr so good but as i ws sketching i was like#u know what u havent done in a while? art tht looks like u r going Insane#art tht makes ur family ask whether everything is ok#so i once again tucked megumi's knees up 2 his chest and apologized insincerely to him fr making the third megumi angst piece in a row#:)
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