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trashmancer · 3 years ago

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Again, been reading a lot recently, and here's some recent reads and my thoughts. (All very spoiler-free)

Johannes Cabal: The Necromancer by Jonathan L. Howard

I'd heard about this series for a while, but had always kept putting off reading it, and finally I was in the mood for some comedic (yet dark) shenanigans--and a villain protagonist as charming as Johannes Cabal really hit me just right. I really enjoyed the first of this series and the introduction to this 1920's-ish universe similar-yet-different to our own that Howard's created. His writing is crisp and clever--and Johannes is a villain protagonist worth cheering for. He's duplicitous, arrogant, and cold, yet sharp-witted and competent enough to be engaging, and even though he's amoral (driven predominately with an "ends do justify the means" mentality) there are glimmers of a conscious buried in there.

The basic gist of the first book is that Johannes Cabal is a necromancer dead-set (ba-dum-sh) on thwarting the biggest plague affecting mankind: Death. As such, he's willing to go to extreme lengths to hone and perfect his necromantic abilities. In the pursuit of this knowledge, Cabal sold his soul to Satan, but he comes to realize he actually needs his soul for his necromancy to work more properly (apparently without a soul it gets very unpredictable). In order to win his soul back, he strikes a wager with Satan: he will accumulate 100 souls for Satan in return for his own. Satan, ever the fair player (not), gifts Cabal with an infernal carnival to help Cabal reach his goal within the year. Shenanigans ensue.

While I read some books in-between this one and the next in the series, I'll write about the other here--

Johannes Cabal: The Detective by Jonathan L. Howard

So clearly I enjoyed the first installment enough to keep going, and I am glad, because I enjoyed the second one even more than the first. It feels like Howard got more comfortable with the characters and world than before, and in this one he expands his universe with some made-up countries that are similar-to-yet-different than countries on our Earth. In this one, Cabal does less fantastic tricks, as he dons the role of investigator (there's been a murder--on an airship!), but the plot was very fun. I will say this is one of the first books in a long while to genuinely make my world-weary ass laugh out loud in public. Howard truly does know how to turn a phrase and comes off with some great witticisms.

Guns of the Dawn by Adrian Tchaikovsky

Tchaikovsky has been on my radar for a while because I have had Children of Time on my reading list for what feels like an age (and I still haven't gotten around to reading it, but I will soon). To prime myself, I looked up other works by Tchaikovsky. This was around the time I was look for good "stand-alone" Adult Fantasy novels as well, so the two linked up and I had this on my TBR for a while and got around to finally cracking it open.

I really loved this book. If I could describe it in any way, it would be sort of like Pride & Prejudice if Elizabeth Bennet got drafted into a war. Seriously. That's how it reads--and Tchaikovsky made the allusions to Austen's work very clear. The setting is very English-inspired, and the time period mimics Napoleonic times. Definitely the first "Flintlock Fantasy" I've had the pleasure of reading.

The themes of the book are about the caustic nature of nationalism, the blurring of truth during war, and what is true patriotism in the face of falsehood and horror. Definitely my kind of questions--and I love watching characters thrown into completely unfamiliar environments. A genteel woman (Emily Marshwic) being tossed headfirst into grisly, mosquito-infested swamps armed with a musket? It's a fascinating journey she undergoes.

Plus the novel featured a romantic subplot that hits my enemies-to-lovers buttons hard. (It's not at all like one of those tired YA enemies-to-lovers stories, but something more grown-up and messy, which I approve of, because I love drama.) But this is more of a personal note. It's definitely not going to be for everyone.

Retribution Falls (Tales of the Ketty Jay #1) by Chris Wooding

After Johannes Cabal, I got into the mood for some steampunk, and I hadn't actually read much in the way of steampunk, so I looked up some recs and the Tales of the Ketty Jay series seemed to appear on a lot of lists for this kinda thing. The basic gist of this one is... imagine steampunk Firefly. That kinda gives you the whole vibe and feel. It's about a crew of disparate and colorful characters all running from something who meet on the ship the Ketty Jay and have to learn to work together to survive.

Overall, it was a fast-paced read (I read this 400 page sucker in a single day--while doing other stuff) and Wooding knows how to write action and interesting character interactions. The world had some glimmers of brilliance (the wizard analogs in their world--daemonist--were the most intriguing part), but otherwise it was very typical steampunk. I had no real quibbles with any of that (aside from the fact some of it read as very cliche and Wooding's inspirations seemed a little obvious--Fullmetal Alchemist and Firefly being the two big ones that kept hammering me over the head), but my main complaint was with the writing and treatment of female characters. First, there is only one main female character in the Ketty Jay's crew--Jez. I had no real issues with Jez's character or writing (in fact she's refreshing in some ways), but she's completely isolated from any other female characters (and is also the only crew member who isn't really allowed to be a complete screw up--she's somewhat sanitized, which, I guess the heroic women characters aren't allowed to be fuck ups like the men?). Second, the other predominate female characters, of whom there are only three, are mute/dehumanized (Bess), characterized as stupid and unhinged (Amalicia), and have rape-as-a-backstory-written-TERRIBLY (Trinica). All that said, as much as it was cringe, this was written in 2009, and I am sure Wooding has had some growth as a writer since then.

I liked this one enough to decide to check out the next in the series (even knowing the writing for the female characters leaves much to be desired).

Black Sun by Rebecca Roanhorse

A Fantasy taking place in an Americas-inspired world? Absolutely refreshing (and more please). The main gist of this one is that a cult sets out to resurrect a dead god (seriously that's the main plot crux) while political machinations are going on in the central city of this country where the resurrection is going to take place. As the novel progresses, it's like a countdown clock to game time. There's four POV characters we follow: Xiala (a Teek sea captain who is kind of an outcast from her native people and has a love for beautiful people), Serapio (the man who has been groomed since birth to be the vessel for the resurrected god, part of this process has included blinding him), Naranpa (the Sun Priest of the capital city who is trying to garner back control the priesthood has lost), and Okoa (who really doesn't even appear until way later into the book; he's been separated from his family to train to be a warrior). For the most part, I was primarily engaged (re: 90% engaged) with Xiala and Serapio's story. They were the most interesting characters, and the journey of them on the sea trying to get to the city before the ceremony was exciting and emotional. The political dealings in Naranpa's segments kind of bogged down the action--and I didn't feel anything for that. Overall though, definitely a thrilling read with a beautifully constructed world. If I had one big criticism, it's that it ended incredibly abruptly without any resolution. I knew going in this was a part of a greater whole, but I still felt the ends could've been knotted a little tighter. I'm left dangling! But I'll be sure to pick up the next one (if anything just to find out what happens to Xiala and Serapio).

Vicious by V.E. Schwab

As an unapologetic villainfucker, I had to read this one, right? It's about not just one, but two villains! How could I lose? And they're in an intense rivalry? Revenge? Betrayal? Superpowers? Gah! Be still my heart!

I'll say I enjoyed this book (fun characters, solid writing), but I didn't love it as much as I thought I would (I wish I could love yooouuuu!). Definitely worth a recommendation to anyone who loves villains and fast-paced narratives, but... there were a few things that tarnished what could've been sparkling. The biggest for me was the jumping around in the first half. For a length of time, the novel leaps between three different points of time, sometimes 2-3 pages at a time, and it was jarring (not confusing, mind you, but it was a jolt each time). I get it was done to create an air of mystique and intrigue, but it felt like I was getting dragged around by the ear. Along with this, the plot just seemed... very convenient? As various moments kept happening, it all felt too tidy and paint-by-numbers. The characters were certainly messy and fun (and I love messy and fun), but the action itself seemed to glide on well-oiled rails with no hiccups. This did lead to the magnetic pacing of the book (which I also read in a day), but it didn't do the drama any favors. Never once did it feel like the characters were caught with their pants down--and I think that's part of the point, but it kind of dampened the tension.

I liked it enough I am definitely going to check out the sequel Vengeful though. If anything I am reading for Sydney, Mitch, and Victor. I gotta know what happens to them!

Right now I am reading some fluffy fluff to cleanse my palette because I've been reading so much moodiness. I'm mid-way through the light and breezy Half a Soul by Olivia Atwater (and it's super cute so far) and then I am finally going to crack open Andy Weir's The Martian (because I have put off reading it for far too long).

#recent reads #book review #just jotting my thoughts down somewhere #seriously though i am itching to read the next johannes cabal but i gotta pace myself #i don't want to burn through those like i did murderbot lol

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dog-day-morning · 3 years ago

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YOU OWE THEM NOTHING

People can be self-righteous when it comes to what they think God is supposed to do if, and when they call on Him. God is not a genie in a bottle that you rub, and a jinn pops out granting you 3 or 300 wishes. The saying faith without works is dead can be applied here. Have you ever heard of or read the book Daniel Webster and the devil? This tall tale or folklore legend was about a man who made a deal with old Slew Foot, and when it was time to pay up he had 2nd thoughts. Satan never plays fair. He's forever putting us in positions where we find ourselves desperate for a quick solution to a temporary problem that only leads to a difficult end. The Latin term for buyer beware is caveat emptor, and Satan knows how to spell. The power of a wicken comes from their basic weapon of spelling or casting spells by word of mouth. Even the Bible tells us that “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” Tell that to a Nicolaitan. Those who make deals with the most unclean should expect to suffer in the end. Never trust the father of lies who deals in treachery, and deceit. I look back at my mother's life and wonder if God had ever intervened for her, and fought her battles that surely He and only He would be able to deliver her from, and He has. Life is hard, for many it’s a nightmare that’s ongoing. Satan comes to you when you're at your weakest or most vulnerable in the hopes of snaring your soul into eternal suffering. Jesus comes to deliver us from death, sin, and temptations that confuse us in our trek towards His truth. If you have any aspirations of entertaining people with your gifted voice or your talent for playing lead guitar, don’t sign a contract that promises you the world only to find out you owe them your sweet ass which a man of honor wouldn't consider let alone make you cosign your body for their horn dog appeasement.

Revelation 2:9

9 I know thy works, and tribulation, and poverty, (but thou art rich) and I know the blasphemy of them which say they are Jews, and are not, but are the synagogue of Satan.

You're abundantly rich in spirit Yacob. Now’s the time to claim your position. These bastards have taken everything from you leaving your ancestors nothing but dust. If they could remove us off the face of the Earth they would. They're plotting to do so as you and I breathe, that's why the Father never sleeps. They are demon spawns who say they worship, and believe in God, but whose god, and what righteous god tells you to destroy a people with his blessing knowing what the children of Japheth have done to them historically? The spawns of Satan want your penuche, mouth, titties, and a-hole for their pleasure along with your talent that Justin Timberlake does not have. The new faces of R&B do not look like the people I grew up listening to or the race of people whose songs left an everlasting impression on my bleeding heart that helped me through my ill-fated, miserable existence. Robin Thicke, Christina Aguilera, K-Pop, the BackStreet Boys, and New Kids on the Block. Some of these groups are defunct, but they’re cranking out as many as they possibly can like Justin Bieber, and Demi Lovato. I just saw on YouTube where people were considering if Elvis Presley was Black, WTF?!! He was the biggest culture thief that Dr. Frankenstein, AKA Colonel Parker ever created. Man is cruel; Satan is a whole other type of bastard you shouldn’t entertain. I'm retarded. Some call me an idiot savant. YO MOMMA!!! People are blessed by the Father who has blessed many of us with gifts. There are many of you whom God has endowed with multiple talents that people would sell their soul in order to possess just one. If you're anointed by God to sing like Aretha Franklin may He lead you to sign with a label like Brother Carl Crawford's who won't make the same mistake he did with a very popular artist at this moment. More than likely you'll sign a contract entrusting your talent, blessing, and soul to the most unclean ones. Ain’t a reason in hell you should bow down or bend over for a leach like Mr. Friedman so he can butt bone your a-hole while enriching himself off your God given talents. God blesses those who seek him out, and those that don’t. I don’t know if Eddie Murphy went to Church, and sowed an offering every Sunday to God praying that the Father would make him the highest paid comedic actor in his prime. Richard Pryor was anointed in the womb to be the most blessed comedic talent, and influential comedian to ever walk this Earth bar none yet he and Mr. Murphy pursued their dreams in different ways with both of them becoming world renown. I'm inclined to ask, was it worth it?

Mark 8:36

For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?

The synagogue of Satan isn’t a trending pop culture manifestation that’s to be esteemed, cherished, or envied. These cults are trying to maintain a stranglehold on a world that’s not meant for them or their sort. People who play with Ouija boards or childhood games like Bloody Mary, and light as a feather are ushering dark spirits into their homes leaving their loved ones exposed to something sinister. Get the hell away from me and mine unless you're my sister, AKA Ms. Skunk Funk, who needs to get the crust burnt off her musty, dusty drawers. The whore of Don Juan has a death wish. Explain to me how running with the devil beats walking with God?

Isaiah 59:7

7 Their feet run to evil, and they make haste to shed innocent blood: their thoughts are thoughts of iniquity; wasting and destruction are in their paths.

This Nation was built on our ancestor’s blood, sweat, and relentless faith. Believe me when I say there's strength in every tear. I pray to God that I don’t shed anymore of them. Their wealth is not. It's a stolen Promise that the Father shall reward His children with. Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it. The most glaring, and frustrating example that is also bitter and disheartening I can give you is our Promised Inheritance called Yisrael that the gentiles are squatting on. When a person or in this case a tribe or race of people believe in their own lies they've become reprobate; they're lost.

Revelation 3:9

9 Behold, I will make them of the synagogue of Satan, which say they are Jews, and are not, but do lie; behold, I will make them to come and worship before thy feet, and to know that I have loved thee.

This is what all of Esau's children fear. It's why the bland, colored people of the world are flipping over the Earth's axis, and killing us without any probable cause. They are a lawless people who've displayed their lack of empathy, and humanity for anyone save their own breed, they behave like blood hounds. I've become content with this planet being void of water (Holy Spirit.) Black people suffer from a social disorder called the crab bucket mentality. We hate to see anyone rise up, and we’ll do whatever it takes to keep them down or discourage them. That person may possess something that can benefit the collective, who cares. He who possesses that blessing needs to haul tail ASAP before the winter comes knowing the Father will bless him, and a downtrodden people beyond their wildest dreams. This is why Yeshua, and His Father call us children. It's why I pray, and bemoan to the Father daily that He slays me, putting the fear of the Lord in the heathen and His Son Christ Jesus uses us for His purpose. God doesn't need us, we need Him. He's given us so much power, and authority. When you acquire it, use it for something other than satisfying your sinful, carnal, flesh minded desires. Men, don't behave like horn dogs, and women do not behave as Aholah, and Aholibah, 2 whores.

Numbers 32:24

24 Build you cities for your little ones, and folds for your sheep; and do that which hath proceeded out of your mouth.

Out of thine own mouth you have power to tread over snakes and scorpions. You can exorcise demons and devils out of your present life braking generational curses which is what I' want for a family that's disowned me. To God be the glory. God is telling us to declare a thing, and claim it. What a mighty, just God we serve. Your tongue will become a weapon to use against the lawless ones who use theirs recklessly in their attempts to get us arrested or murdered by local, and federal authorities. You can call it giving them a taste of their own medicine, it isn't. You're reclaiming what they've taken, stolen, including those of us they've murdered.

Isaiah 54:17

17 No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord.

The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. Speak positive prayers out loud if you can. If you live with your family or have a roommate pray in the closet. You'll have favor with God that many people won't. They rebuked the Lord, and their anger did tear perpetually, and they kept their wrath forever. When they use their privilege, which is what we call it more often than they, comprehending they’re fully aware knowing they use it with a Demonic, driven hatred. They persecute Black men, women, and children for reasons that are not godly, and the Father does not condone. They, and all the Earth will have to answer for our individual sins against the Father in the end.

Luke 10:19

19 Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you.

We don’t worship the same god as they do. They're praying to a god to erase us off the face of the Earth. Why hasn't he?.

Exodus 1:12

12 But the more they afflicted them, the more they multiplied and grew. And they were grieved because of the children of Israel.

Their birth rate is dropping steadily. For the first time in the history of the census they decreased in population globally while indigenous, and other races of people stayed steady or in our case increased. This is the reasoning behind these draconian abortion laws. They're trying to preserve themselves while God is eliminating the Earth of their bloody dominion. God is sending the wicked a message before the storm comes, but no one's listening. Their violence towards us is documented, and more often it's unprovoked. They continue with the guilty until proven worthy of their mercy dogmatic mantra which is racist BS. The Earth will be lulled back to sleep. When they're confident that their world isn't in danger of being challenged by anyone, especially us. That's when God will do things that will scare them right back to the caucasus mountains bringing destruction to those who've touched, bruised, and abused the Apple of His eye. Speak life into your angel spirit, don’t entertain the demon seed that's trying to kill you, and the rest of Earth's indigenous people. You have much authority, use it. Elohim. 9/23/2021

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luvreyn · 5 years ago

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My Manhwa List (2020) Part 9

How are you?

Aewol's Dream

Description:

Instead of borrowing the power of the earring and gaining strong strength, the people of Miao are suppressed by their side effects, the two families Aewol and Fanhwa who survived the crisis of extinction hundreds of years ago, both live quietly in the western part of the continent, serving as a guard for Dang Juhwan. One day, 'Juno' a representative of the God of Yokai, descends to the ground and pronounces a 'trial' on the people of Miao. If they can't solve the mysterious ordeal, the two of them will disappear and the people of Miao will disappear from the earth ..! Can Aewol and Fanhwa overcome this crisis? And why did the ordeal come to Miao?

THOUGHTS & WHY READ THIS:

- plot = 5/5 bcoz i believe that’s what it deserves

- art = 4/5

- look at them so cute

- why do the good ones have to have 1 chap release :((

- i love that there’s a god concept cause im really a sucker for that type of stories

- women empowerment!

- has great potential!

- verdict, an interesting read!

Romance Sonata

Description:

I'm writing to you again today as a friend with trust and love. I hope that when you receive this letter, you will think of me. Whenever I remember you, I am filled with such longing, agony, and affection.

Romance Sonata - A collection of short love stories.

Story #1 - Rowen's Red Roofed House

Story #2 - Gift

Story #3 - Andvas' Treasure

Story #4 - Loss and Love

Story #5 - Milky Dragon

THOUGHTS & WHY READ THIS:

- as stated, it’s a short collection of stories

- read the rowen’s red roofed house cause it’s the best

- rowen art = 4.5/5 look at that perfect smileee

- rowen plot = 3/5

- tbh i think it had potential if it wasnt a short story

- the mc and ml are so cute together i cant even

- verdict, a cute read!

A Vampire’s First Love

Description:

"When you open your eyes in this world once more, you will fall in love with the human who possesses the other half of your heart." The story of the sealed vampire who finally meets his destined partner!

THOUGHTS & WHY READ THIS:

- plot = 4/5

- art = 4.5/5

- red string of fate coming right up uwu

- i love that a deity is involve!

- f a n t a s y

- f u n n y

- verdict, interesting story!

Nano List

Description:

One day, a birthday gift from my dead sister arrived. THOUGHTS & WHY READ THIS:

- plot = 10/5

- art = 5/5

- i started reading this yesterday cause i was bored and now i’m done & all i can is holy macaroni it’s so beautiful and it blew my mind

- the story is well connected and i couldnt believe the plot twists

- all the characters are hands down!

- a roller coaster ride of emotions!! made me laugh so hard and made me cry cause omg

- seriously this deserves many readers

- arguably one of the best this 2020 (even if it was finish/released yrs ago)

- pls dont make the same mistake as i did and read it now!

- so many factors that makes the story worthwhile

- same author as ‘lee doona/girl from downstairs’ & ‘shackles - story of brother and sister’ i am now convinced that sunbaenim is a genius in this field

- mystery, thriller and suspense all in one

- comedic gold

- a gem basically

- trigger warnings are advise pls do read with caution

- verdict, a must read! highly highly recommended!

Shackles - Story of Brother and Sister

Description:

Jun-Hyun and Na-Hyun are a brother-sister duo with an almost obsessive devotion to each other. Is it simply a case of forbidden love between siblings? Or is something more sinister at play?

THOUGHTS & WHY READ THIS:

- plot = 5/5

- art = 5/5

- the author really knows how grab the attention of its viewers for real!!

- same author as lee doona aka girl from downstairs & nano list aka a gem

- s u s p e n s e cause we dont really know what the hell happened

- and holy macaroni i swear they are doing this guy dirty cause he’s a softie

- he’s so soft towards his sister

- his sister is kinda suspicious and idk im smelling something else

- read this pls

- keeps me on my toes and makes me hug my teddy cause i’m kinda scared on what’s to come and at the same time i am so thrilled

- amen

- a hidden gem

- trigger warnings are advise because of the content pls do read with caution

- verdict, a highly recommended!

#romance sonata #Shackles - Story of Brother and Sister #Nano List #A Vampire’s First Love #Aewol's Dream #manhwa #manhwa recommendation #reynlist #reyn.manhwarecs

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the-odinson · 4 years ago

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Thor 🗲 Intro

“Fortunately, I am mighty...”

OOC PORTION —

NAME: Danny

PRONOUNS: he/him

AGE: 23

TIMEZONE: GMT +1

TRIGGERS: None

IC PORTION; BASICS —

CHARACTER NAME: Thor Odinson

FACECLAIM: Chris Hemsworth

AFFILIATIONS: The Avengers

AGE: 1500s/appears mid 30s

SPECIES: Alien (Asgardian)

IDENTITY: Public

DOES YOUR CHARACTER LIVE IN THE MOUSEHOLE? IF SO, WHAT ARE THEIR DUTIES? Yes, but he doesn’t particularly like it there. He doesn’t feel the effects of the cold, but Thor has never liked being confined so prefers to get outside as much as possible. Thor has decided to take on the role of a hunter/gatherer. The vast forests of Europe aren’t too dissimilar to the Asgardian wilderness and, while the beasts aren’t as ferocious as back home, what’s a king to do if not revel in the hunt? When needed he will also help with aid work: he can cover great distances with ease and carrying heavy loads is hardly a problem for him.

DESCRIBE SIX TRAITS (3 positive, 3 negative) YOUR CHARACTER HAS AND HOW THESE AFFECT THEM:

Dependable: A man of his word, Thor is trustworthy and reliable; an asset in any team and to anyone who has a favour to ask. Endearing: Those who truly get to know Thor speak of him with admiration; his warm smile and welcoming personality don’t come to all, but if he lets his guard down you’re guaranteed a friend with whom you feel truly comfortable. Benevolent: Thor (usually) means well and (usually) tries to be kind to anyone he encounters. His exterior may come across as brash but there’s no malice involved, often just a difference in culture and upbringing. Obstinate: While being headstrong may not always be a negative thing, Thor hates to admit he’s wrong and has a tendency to steamroll down a chosen path rarely reassessing whether the choices he made were the right ones or simply the first ones. Distrusting: Thor enjoys being social but mainly around those he’s close to. He can appear a little hostile to strangers: while he wants to believe in the good in people, he’s been around long enough and seen a lot of the universe to know of the potential darkness inside them too. Reckless: Thor often acts on impulse and charges into situations unprepared. This can lead to serious damage caused to both himself and those around him.

POWERS AND/OR ABILITIES: Super strength: Son of Odin and King of Asgard, Thor is physically the strongest of all Asgardians, with feats including being able to go one-on-one with the Hulk and other powerful entities. Flight: Thor’s magical axe Stormbreaker grants him the ability to fly. Electricity Manipulation: Thor is capable of generating electrical energy within his body and can expel it in the form of lightning bolts. Using Stormbreaker makes the energy generation and expulsion much more powerful and efficient. Weather Control: Similarly, either with or without Stormbreaker (although with Stormbreaker is easier), Thor can control the sky and create storms. Durability: His Asgardian physiology grants much more durability than a human one, able to shrug off energy blasts and recover from injury much quicker. Thor can also survive in space and alien atmospheres. Allspeak: Also called the All-Tongue, Asgardians speak a magic-based language, granting the ability to understand and be understood in all the languages of the Nine Realms. Bifrost: Stormbreaker also gifts Thor the power to summon the Bifrost, the Rainbow Bridge connecting all realms, allowing intergalactic travel between worlds in a matter of moments.

WEAKNESSES: There aren’t many things on Earth that could pose a threat to Thor, so it’s hard to pinpoint any specific weaknesses. Perhaps for someone like Thor, the word god comes up so often that he sometimes forgets it’s not true: he is mortal and, while far more durable than a human, he can get injured and he can get killed, a fact that he often brushes to the side when charging into battle. However he has become far more self-aware after losing an eye (and almost his life) to Hela.

IC PORTION; DETAILS —

WHAT BROUGHT YOUR CHARACTER TO SOKOVIA?

Sokovia is where the majority of Thor’s allies are, and he needs their help. His world gone, his people stranded on the nearest hospitable realm in need of a home; Thor knew of a place where the Asgardians could blend in and live peaceful lives. The problem is, however, it seems Earth is not quite at peace right now. When he couldn’t track down the Avengers in New York, he followed the trail to Novi Grad. His priorities are conflicting: while he came back to Earth to ask the Avengers’ help in establishing a new Asgard on this planet, he feels he should stay to try and help his friends however he can in aiding the Nomad’s cause.

DID THEY SIGN THE ACCORDS? WHY OR WHY NOT?

No - the whole Accords situation is mostly unbeknownst to Thor due to being offworld at the time of signing. From what he can gather, it isn’t something that would appeal to him. He feels the affairs of humans are mostly petty ones and, despite his growing acclimatisation to Earth and its customs, he doesn’t understand why humans have to be so divided about, well, pretty much everything.

PROVIDE 3-5 HEADCANONS RELATED TO YOUR CHARACTER: 1. Although Thor is an alien, he has spent enough time on this planet (in both modern and ancient times) for the culture shock to lessen so that now Earth to Thor is more comparable to a human travelling to a different country - he acknowledges that the differences are neither better nor worse and he chooses to respect them. He knows he will make mistakes and appear strange, but sees that now as an opportunity for personal growth. 2. One thing he doubts he will ever understand however, is the human version of ‘entertainment’. Thor cannot stand movies. On Asgard, they would entertain themselves by slaying fearsome monsters or engaging in a friendly drunken brawl, the more broken furniture the better! But on Earth they amuse themselves by… sitting down and staring at a screen for hours on end. While both Asgard and Earth had/have magnificent technology, it’s clear they used it very differently.

3. Since returning to Earth, Thor has become intrigued in the Norse tales of himself and his people from over a thousand years ago and their alleged feats. He finds it highly amusing how inaccurate the stories are, but it has led to a fascination of human mythology and the various pantheons across history and the world. He wonders if he will ever meet any other of these so-called gods.

4. While a human brain only has capacity for almost a century’s worth of memories, an Asgardian brain is built for a few millennia’s worth. Therefore Thor has a much more acute long-term memory than his human companions, although occasionally his short-term memory leaves something to be desired, especially after several pints of mead.

WANTED CHARACTER CONNECTIONS:

Loki: His brother and the person he loves (and hates) most in the cosmos. I know a thing or two about brotherly love (I’ve been experiencing it for 23 years) so would love to write for Thor with his undeniably most personal connection. Wonder Woman: Both ancient, both ‘gods’ and both so very far from home. Despite their different allegiances I think it would be great to have Thor bond with perhaps the one person around here who may truly understand him. Superman: If anything they both have fabulous red capes. They are quite similar power-wise, although I know Superman is stronger but Thor definitely wouldn’t want to admit that. It could lead to some healthy (or unhealthy?) competition between the two, especially seeing as Thor isn’t too fond of the Justice League. Captain America & Iron Man: The two splintered team leaders. Thor respects them both (Tony a little less, perhaps…) and, since he doesn’t really understand the extent of the accords, would like to hear their sides of the story and what has happened since the Ultron incident. Bruce Banner: Thor has fought with the Hulk a couple of times but feels this has brought the two closer, learning more about how Bruce ticks and now he feels there’s a protective bond between the pair. I think the interactions they have could bring out the comedic style of writing which I love!

POTENTIAL CHARACTER ARCS: In the previous paragraph I said I like writing comedic characters (of which Thor fits the bill) but I also want to explore the deeper aspects of his personality such as the emotional pain of losing his parents, his childhood friends and his home. This could manifest in him not wanting to form bonds with others in the Mousehole at first because he’s lost so many people: why would he want to get close with anyone else only to lose them again? Perhaps a dramatic fallout with someone from a different team could lead to serious consequences for him or the team as a whole.

The reason I chose for placing Thor in Sokovia is that he’s seeking a location for New Asgard: maybe with all its emigrating population and empty buildings Sokovia could be the perfect location… I’m not sure how it would work in the group, but maybe Thor could eventually bring the Asgardians here, both to settle and to help with the restoration of the country.

CHARACTER BIO —

You know the story. An Asgardian prince, lacking in humility and exiled to Earth in order to learn what it means to be worthy. A classic tale, but at its heart, a tale of loss, and a tale of what it means to truly be human: even if you’re not. Thor has lived for well over a millenia, but only in the last decade has his life really begun. From landing on Earth a long time after people stopped worshipping him, he slowly began to understand the importance of relationships; from forming close bonds with the Avengers (and wary acquaintances with the Justice League and X-Men), to experiencing true love for the very first time. All his life Thor had assumed that humans were lesser beings, so why then did he feel he was learning so much more from them than he had ever learned from his own kind?

After experiencing the death of his mother, then later on his father and three close childhood friends, Thor was at breaking point when his home realm of Asgard was obliterated during Ragnarök by the fire demon Surtur. With the title of King thrust upon him, Thor decided his duty to his people had to consume him before his emotions did. Pursuing the quest of a new home, he led them to Nidavellir, the homeworld of the dwarfs; unsurpassable smiths and mechanics with the power to forge almost anything the mind can dream of, ruled over by their King, Eitri. Eons ago, Eitri had forged the legendary hammer Mjölnir (destroyed by Hela) at Odin’s request, now he oversaw the creation of the glorious axe Stormbreaker when asked by Thor, capable of summoning the rainbow bridge despite its apparent destruction on Asgard. Armed with his new tool and a promise to the Asgardians of a brighter future, Thor set out alone across the stars, heading to Midgard to find his old allies the Avengers. He’d helped the humans many times before, hopefully they’ll be able to help him and his race this time.

It took Thor losing everything to appreciate what he has. As he enters the next phase of his life in Sokovia, without family or a home, he is truly the definition of a nomad.

#srisingintro #biography

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greenninjagal-blog · 5 years ago

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currently vibing in a two-week lockdown, can you share some of your favorite fics? i need some new things to read, and I've got too much time on my hands-

Aw man, same! The rest of my actual Spring Semester got turned online… Let’s see…..Fic recs for the pseudo End of the World (Courtesy of AO3, arranged by most prominent ship!) Keep in mind that my descriptions are shorter and written mostly for comedic effect than the actual fics, so if something looks interesting Click it! Get more info about it! Don’t just take my word! I tried my best to get a lot of variety of fics and topics and tropes, as well as authors that might not be as well known! Uhhh here are the links to lists I’ve already made for various other reasons check out my Fic Rec Masterlist!

I also am including various of my fav authors masterlists for funsies!

jungle321jungle’s || Max-isTired’s || TrashficParlour’s || Lefaystrent’s || Mine!

Completed Fics

A Deal in which Virgil tries to summon a familiar and gets a Circle King instead. And he’s really pretty. (Anxceit)

Love Like You in which Virgil decides to give up looking for a romantic partner and considers adopting instead. He finds more than he’s looking for with a set of twins and the man who watches over them (Anxceit)

A Dragon’s Tail in which Logan is cursed to be a Dragon by his best friends stepmother, Virgil is struggling to learn a power he can’t control, Patton who’d rather marry a servant than the Prince, and Roman has no clue what is going on but the Prince he’s supposed to be saving can probably kick his ass. (Logicality, Prinxiety)

A Game of Vice in which Remus kidnaps Roman and turns it into a game of who can come save him from his lonely tower. (Logicality, Prinxeity)

double down with the paradigms in which Logan tries to explain away his own OCD while dealing with the emotions he has for a certain Pre-Vet. Excellent depiction of OCD, made me cry, 300/10 would read again. (Logicality, Prinxiety)

It Takes Two to Tango in which Roman begs his brother, Logan, to let him go back in time to meet a famous dancer. Falling in Love was not part of the plan. (Prinxiety, Logicality)

A favorite star in the heavens in which everyone has at least one soulmate. They’re luckily enough to have three each. (LAMP)

Forgotten Forests and Magnified Myths in which Logan finds out very suddenly that he has the passive ability to talk to dragons. (DAMP, Remilie)

Sense5 in which five people in different countries are suddenly psychically linked together and uh…yeah fun times. (DLAMP)

Stray Hearts Are Subject To Change in which black cat hybrid Virgil plans to die very heroically in an alley and Roman completely messes up that plan by being a decent human being. (Prinxiety, Logicality)

Hidden In Shadows in which Virgil is the boogieman every adult warned you about but he doesn’t actually enjoy being scary. Good thing the three Sanders kids aren’t scared of anything. (Not so good for their very confused Dad who isn’t sure what to do about their new imaginary friend)

Paved with Good Intentions in which the dark sides agree to send Virgil to the light sides as a way to get Thomas to listen to them more. Now if Virgil can just get along with the Light sides enough to actually start making some progress…

Absent Gods and Silent Tyranny or: How Logan Learned to Stop Over Thinking and Love Everyone in which Logan is a morally grey scientist who just works for supervillains because they pay well. He doesn’t expect someone like Virgil to change that.

Series

Clouds and Moss AU in which the sides are gods and its very gay and very good. (Intrulogical, Roceit)

Colors in which Logan is an excellent Dad, Virgil is an amazing son, and the world is very colorful. (Logicality)

Labeled in which Logan is a famous superhero, Patton is a doctor, and they adopt the would-be super villain and everything is soft and lovely and I cry at the purity. (Logicality, Remilie)

Fbi!au in which the sides work for the fbi and I diligently reread these series of oneshots for a daily dose of serotonin! (Logince, Moxiety)

Growing Old is More Fun with You in which Patton is a PTA dad and so is Deceit and they have a “rivalry”. (Mociet)

Gilded Cage in which Roman is forced to dance for the fairy queen whenever she wants it. (Prinxiety)

Renegades! in which the sides live in a dystopia and fight the government while being completely in love with each other. (Prinxiety, Logiciality)

Love and Other Fairytales in which a couple decides to keep their changling and their actual son, a child is cursed gifted a voice that makes people do whatever he says, a boy makes a rotten deal for the sake of his friend, and centuries before any of this, a fae prince is tricked into an endless sleep by his brother.

The Vampire Hunting Vampire in which Virgil was turned into a monster and LPR slowly convince him he’s not as bad as he thinks he is. Through cuddles. (LAMP, DLAMP)

Wasteland, Baby! in which there are things in the woods and Patton gets,,, intimate with them. On purpose! (LAMP)

Destined in which Damian has successfully ignored his Soulmates for five years and he planned on doing it for much longer but on his twentieth birthday fate intervenes with a second soultrait that forces him to come face to face with all of them. (DLAMP)

Old Gods in which Gods sometimes walk the earth and Remus is pleased to hear that people are still making offerings to him– wait that is not a goat. And other fun stories!

Sit back and watch the world go by in which Virgil is a human abducted by alien smugglers, befriends Patton, breaks out, and everyone fears humans as space orcs, almost as much as Virgil is afraid of them.

Teaming the Pieces Together in which Thomas is a pokemon trainer and eevees just…click with him.

Tales from the Dark Sides in which the author provides a lovely hub of works where Virgil is abused by OC dark sides and DLMPR are there to help patch him up.

Uncle Emile and the Super Nephews in which Emile gets custody of his six nephews and tries to bond with them. They in turn try very hard not to tell him they have superpowers.

Cuffed Universe in which Remus is a cop chasing after a hacker, Logan breaks the laws and Virgil would just like tO KEEP ONE JOB WITHOUT ONE OR BOTH OF THE OTHERS DRAGGING HIM INTO THEIR SHIT. (Analomus)

Ongoing Fics

The Origin in which space travel via Thomas Sanders’s ship SS Revelation gets more complicated when the Planets themselves turn out to be entities who aren’t all on board with humanity spreading to the rest of the solar system. (Remile)

Delicato in which Logan and Patton are music professors with very different conceptions of music, and Virgil and Roman are students in both their classes who just want them to kiss already. (Logicality, Prinxiety)

Coming out of The Shadows in which a small mutant child Virgil is treated as subhuman because of his uncontrolled ability to manipulate shadows up until a scientist buys him. (Royality)

Falling Stars At My Command in which Roman wishes on a star and Patton reaps the benefits while Logan unfortunately gets dragged along for the ride. (Royality)

Sugar in which Patton has three sons and no free time to bother with a relationship while he’s trying to manage bills. At least until Roman walks into his life. Sugar Daddy anyone? (Royality)

A Man, a Snake, and a Rat in which Logan, Deceit, and Remus become college roomates (Intruloceit)

a.s.h.es, ashes (We all fall down) in which after Logan almost dies during one of his recuse missions, him and his partner start to dig into the superhero agency they’re employed by and stumble into something far bigger than they expected. (Logicality, Prinxiety, LAMP? LAMP)

Keep him safe in which Detective Logan falls for the owner of his new favorite bakery while his partner Roman falls for the gang member they’re chasing. Ft: emotions, a pet rat, dealing with delusions 101, trauma, and family so gooey it literally makes me melt whenever it updates. I love this fic so much. (Advertises as Logicality and Prinxiety but theres so much LAMP I can’t not put it down here)

Multitudes in which Virgil works at a coffeeshop, pines over the customers that come in, and wonders why they all tip him so well. (LAMP)

Songbird in which the only thing keeping Virgil’s parents alive is his voice: the moment the (new) King gets tired of listening to him its off with all their heads. And Virgil’s okay with that, he is…. Until three visiting nobles leaving him wishing for his freedom for the first time since he was ten. (LAMP)

Shatter in which Logan gets fed up with not being listened to, and takes some poor advice from Rage, which ends with the entire Mindscape being turned upside down and inside out. Now its up to Deceit fix it all. (aka the author decided it was about high time Deceit got some love and appreciation and I’m out here living for it.) (DAMP)

Incredible Cosmic Power in which Virgil awakens some genies by accident and they refuse to let him go back to living a relatively normal peaceful life. (DLAMP)

Plea for my New Self in which Vampire Virgil decides he wants to start over again, and goes back to college to work on coding. There he proceeds to do reckless good with his absurd amount of wealth and a “fuck it” attitude. Actually one of my favorite things ever okay. I love this one so much. (DLAMP)

Your Wish Is My Command in which Thomas accidentally rubs six lamps and becomes the glorified babysitter to six jinn who definitely don’t trust him. But its fineeee. (DLAMP)

6 Dads in which Deceit, Emile, Remus, Roman, Thomas, and Remy make a relationship work and their children aren’t sure how but go along with it anyway.

Rebel Rebel in which Thomas, a well respected man, visits the Imagination, for some pleasure business as a one time thing. Except that he keeps coming back. Maybe maybe falls in love with one, two, thr– all of the men who work there.

A New Kind of Experiment in which Virgil runs away from home, and ends up kidnapped by merman, and somehow he doesn’t mind that much.

Becoming His Own Hero in which everyone has to juggle their superhero lives with their regular lives and sometimes…its just hard.

don’t wanna be a tragedy in which brothers Roman and Remus get a house and subsequently find out its totally, completely, 100% haunted.

Don’t You, Forget About Me in which the author recreates Breakfast club and does it spectacularly.

Heart’s Heroes in which Patton may be a villain but that does not mean he wants to see the child heroes of the city dead.

Mortals and Fae in which Deceit barely escapes the wrath of his town when they all turn against him. Dying, he stumbles into a fairy circle hoping that with his name the fae make his death short and sweet. Big Shock for him when he wakes up with a Fairy Prince swearing to protect him.

Sanders Family in which Thomas adopts six kids and has no regrets about it.

How Not to Go About an Important Inspection in which after a devastating betrayal the crew of the USS Bifrost is docked for repairs and the crew just wants to go back to being a normal family but Command is insisting on an inspection to ensure nothing so…drastic occurs again.

Symbiotic in which certain Vampires have a vemon that leaves with victims craving getting their blood drunken. Deceit, one of these Victims, continues to burn bridges because that’s easier than admitting he might need help dealing with this.

#greengabs #fic recs #Lockdown 2020 list #god this took me like eight hours to put together #I hope this helps

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ahouseoflies · 5 years ago

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The Best Films of 2019, Part VI

Yes, I know that it’s almost March. Thanks for taking the ride. GREAT MOVIES

22. Apollo 11 (Todd Douglas Miller)- To disrespect this movie is to disrespect the moon landing itself so... I do like listening to the Walter Cronkite snippets about "the burdens and dreams of all mankind" and smirking at the idiots who talk about "back when people just read the news without editorializing." 21. Waves (Trey Edward Shults)- I could have done with five fewer shots of people holding each other, and the foreshadowing could be more subtle, but, man, Shults takes some huge swings here, for a more powerful effect than either of his previous films had. It isn't often that a colorist gets a single card in the opening credits, but it makes sense for a film that stands out as much as this loud, woozy piece does. I don't think there's anything as present-tense this year as a character drunk-driving to Kanye West's "I Am a God." 20. Jojo Rabbit (Taika Waititi)- The dissenters of Jojo Rabbit have been pretty uniform in their negativity, and I think their stance has to do with not wanting to be told what to think or feel. (Putting "an anti-hate satire" on the poster has to fire up those haters.) This movie is not subtle or ambiguous, but you know what? Casablanca is a pretty didactic movie too. Let me back up from the C-word. For me, the film's emotional scenes are better than its comedic scenes, but in either form, Waititi directly engages with a ten-year-old in a way that neither romanticizes him nor condescends to him. That's such an imperfect, transformative age in a boy, and not enough movies are willing to wrestle with how ugly it can be. Roman Griffin Davis is pretty good, but he's spotted by sincere, compassionate performances by Thomasin McKenzie and Scarlett Johansson. It's possible that Johansson has never been better. I totally understand why someone with her sex symbol baggage would resist playing mothers; if I've done my homework, this is the first time she has done it, even though she's a parent in real life. But her maternal scenes here are heartbreaking in their patience, particularly in a scene for which her character "plays" herself and her absent husband. Besides uncorking a more vulnerable part of herself, Johansson nails the performative aspect of being a parent, resisting the urge to make everything a lesson but wanting so desperately to be a positive example for a kid who needs one. 19. Honeyland (Ljubomir Stefanov and Tamara Kotevska)- I greatly prefer the term "non-professional actor" or "first-time actor" to "non-actor" because it's only human nature to act differently when being filmed. The second even a camera filming a birthday party captures you, you start to perform. But in handmade stone houses in rural Macedonia, the subjects are true non-actors. They have no affect because, in all likelihood, they have not seen a movie before. So the way that Hatidze lived over the course of the three years of this project--with purpose, focus, and wisdom--seemed new to me. Honeyland is the gift that I always hope for from documentary and (especially) foreign documentary: a slice of life that I never knew I needed. 18. Under the Silver Lake (David Robert Mitchell)- Andrew Garfield's Sam spends a lot of time on his balcony surveying his apartment complex, staring at a topless woman in a way that recalls Marlowe in The Long Goodbye, one reference point among hundreds. Sometimes he watches through binoculars, sometimes he watches through blinds--blind imagery that shows up over and over again in a movie about voyeurism. Anyway, this neighbor keeps parrots, who we're told as kids can "talk." Not that the animals have any conscious intention with their mimicking, but they replicate what they hear or are taught. The words are signified without any signifiers, so it's hard to even classify the noises as speech. Maybe those noises are everything--a tie to our species that reveals impressive intelligence--but maybe they're nothing--a silly hope of a world that seems less alone. And that subjective interpretation of code is the clearest metaphor in an otherwise elliptical, bizarre, sprawling, sui generis film. It's messy alright. Some of the threads lead nowhere, but in a movie about order and chaos, that's obviously the point. The scene with The Songwriter--barely any of the characters have names--is over ten minutes and might not have any narrative consequence. But in the moment it's earth-shattering and urgent. And maybe I'm the obvious audience, but I'm not going to complain about anyone taking a dance break for "What's the Frequency, Kenneth?" 17. 1917 (Sam Mendes)- Weirdly enough, a Lauryn Hill line kept bouncing around in my head as I was nervously tapping my foot: "It could all be so simple, / But you had to make it hard." This is a direct story told with impossible technical aptitude. 1917 isn't saying anything new, but have you ever seen a plane crash ten feet away from the camera forty-five minutes into an unbroken take? No offense, but do you remember when we were all impressed that Creed had a five-minute fight in one take? Blimey. 16. American Factory (Steven Bognar and Julia Reichert)- It's a rare documentary that makes its case so gracefully and so forcefully at the same time. The film ends so conclusively that it could be considered labor activism, but it's so fair that the union-busting schmucks are willing to joke around with the filmmakers without obfuscating at all. The obvious forebearer for this sort of boots-on-the-ground snapshot of American labor is Harlan County U.S.A., but American Factory is more staid and less concerned with setting because, you know, this could be anywhere.The Chairman is the best villain since Thanos, and as he looked back on his life while walking around his empty cabana, I had to squint a bit to make sure he wasn't purple.

15. Ad Astra (James Gray)- Ad Astra declares so that it can suggest. The opening crawl says that the near future is a "time of hope and conflict," but all we see is the conflict: the pirates on a borderless moon that we've ruined with Applebee'ses, the neglected wife leaving her ring on a table, the voiceover that declares, "I always wanted to be an astronaut...for all mankind and all." This film will take place in four parts--Earth, Moon, Mars, Neptune--and each part will offer unique obstacles to challenge our phlegmatic but confused hero. But all of that table-setting allows James Gray to explore. There's a scene in which the Roy character uses a belt to pull himself, one tug at a time, deeper into the unknown, and we see the action through the reflection in his helmet as we're watching his face. We're seeing through his eyes but at a remove, and in this moment we're watching him heave himself into emptiness, thinking that the more distant and lonely and absent he gets, the more of a man he becomes. We know that's not true, but we kind of think it is from the movies, and Ad Astra has a happy ending if only because it wants to disprove that notion. Lots of artistes talk about how they could, without compromise, make grand, big-budget entertainments if they only wanted to. James Gray did. 14. Ash Is Purest White (Jia Zhangke)- In a train on the way to her hometown, the protagonist Xiao casually tells a fellow passenger that she has seen a UFO. Although it comes up later in a sort of magic realism flourish, her statement seemed like a character moment for me. People who see UFOs are either guileless rubes or attention-seeking hucksters, and that's the dance of Tao Zhao's performance. Even after seeing the movie, I can't tell which one Xiao is. Often it changes in the course of a scene. The time when she shows the most agency, firing off her boyfriend's illegal gun to ward off his attackers, results in the time when she is the most helpless, being ordered around in jail. She might confess her ex-con status in a moment of vulnerability, then flake out at the next train stop in an attempt to seize her power back. (It's worth mentioning that there are lots of movies about flaky drifters who don't pay the tab, but few of them are about women.) Even the way that she holds her backpack--frontways--is street-smart and child-like at the same time. This is the second film that Jia has made with a triptych setting, (Mountains May Depart is slightly superior.) and he doesn't make the flash forwards obvious. He invites the performance's same sort of healthy confusion upon the viewer with the formal elements. I, for one, am willing to get probed by these foreign objects. 13. Toy Story 4 (Josh Cooley)- I questioned a late moment in the film, one of the plottier ones in which Woody goes back to save another toy one more laborious time. When I sighed, my wife reminded me, "He never leaves a toy behind." Toy Story 4 is a dazzling upgrade in the series from a visual standpoint, (I gasped again at Woody lying in a damp, sunny patch of concrete.) but it's more of a reminder of the consistent character development and weight that have been blanketing us for twenty-three years. Pixar isn't reinventing the wheel because it is the wheel. Sure, the characters are too numerous and separate now. I miss the OG's Rex and Hamm. But for one thing, that rogue's gallery makes it funnier when, say, Buttercup pops up with a joke out of nowhere. And the new characters, particularly Forky the Nihilist, are so lovable that I wouldn't know who to trade. Toy Story 4 is probably the worst of the franchise, but that franchise--especially when its subtext seems to be questioning people who want to stop intellectual property from evolving--might be the best we have. 12. Clemency (Chinonye Chukwu)- In discussing the aftermath of an execution, Alfre Woodard's warden character Bernadine mentions the mother who will claim a prisoner's body, who will follow through with plans for burial. And I realized, to be honest, that I had never thought about how executed bodies are claimed and laid to rest, though obviously those sad practicalities persist. This whole film is a reminder of the numerous costs that arise from a system that is out of time and out of reason. To that end, every character is fully drawn with empathy. For example, the assistant warden, which could have been a nothing part, has ambitions and fears that give him an arc that shades the protagonist. The Richard Schiff and Wendell Pierce characters make the film about the compromised promises of retirement, but the assistant warden is there to tug us back into law enforcement. Neon ended up putting this movie on the awards circuit back burner, but Aldis Hodge deserves the world. Although the film piles on one indignity too many for my taste, drifting into miserableism, Hodge's performance has a rare possessive quality. Catatonic in his most crestfallen moments and antic when he clings to hope, Hodge drags the audience along with him. The character is quiet, but every word counts. 11. The Farewell (Lulu Wang)- I was not been more thoroughly charmed all year, especially by Awkwafina, who is a revelation in a tricky role. There are a few scenes that get comedic effect through repetition, and it's telling that the subtitles stop by the third or fourth run-through of a line. The movie assumes you're smart, which goes even further than its piercing emotion. Shout-out to Mr. Li, who made me crack up every time I saw him. The elderly sort-of-boyfriend is such a common figure in real life, but I'm not sure I've ever seen that character type on screen. I'm not sure I've seen any of this on-screen, and that's the reason the film exists.

10. Avengers: End Game (Joe Russo and Anthony Russo)- For a guy who grew up in the '30s, Captain America is pretty cool with gay people. 9. Gloria (Sebastian Lelio)- I saw Lelio's original Gloria, the one that he's remaking here, and it didn't do much for me, even though it hit some of the same beats as this one. I wonder what the difference could be...do you think the total commitment of one of the greatest actresses in the world matters? Lelio documents who this woman is to her children, to her mother, to her ex-husband, to her lover, to her co-workers, and it's by tracking the tiny compromises of those relationships that the viewer gets to see the fully realized her. The cyclical editing of those pieces--sing a disco song to herself in the car, rinse, repeat--ends up lulling the viewer into his role of seeing the complete Gloria. It ends up being a fun, absorbing process. I yelled out loud at Turturro for disrespecting my girl. Moore, who is in every scene, sells us on these different versions of the character through complete control of her instrument. She lets headphones slump along her body at work. She kneels down toward a street performer in a more maternal way than she ever presents with her actual daughter. She sits cross-legged with her best friend, as if they're little girls. I won't spoil what she does at the end, when she is at her most empowered. 8. Midsommar (Ari Aster)- I love this movie, but, boy, is it a friendship killer if you recommend it to the wrong person. Whether you liked Hereditary or not is a good predictor for your taste, but I think Ari Aster's follow-up is much better: Whereas the unpredictability of Hereditary makes the mysticism of its final fourth seem like a leap that you either accept or don't, Midsommar is driving so hard in one direction that its dread is even more pronounced. (The prologue is so masterfully deliberate and gloomy that it takes a long time for the film to get back to those depths.) For comparison's sake again, Aster was painting in the colors of hysteria and fractured relationships before, but the new film seems much more biting and vital in the way it depicts modern men and women. I'm thinking of the way Dani excuses herself at the risk of compromising her safety or rationalizes her boyfriend's forgetting her birthday with "Well, I didn't remind him." All of the characters become victims of a misinformed, selfish brand of multicultural tolerance that makes them rationalize evil instead of speaking up, and that acceptance serves the plot way better than the average horror movie's running up the stairs instead of out the door. For his part, Christian, who seems sympathetic at first, takes ideas, drugs, and even women for himself with impunity. (It's important that he's an anthropology student, and it's more important that his name is Christian.) When he colonizes his Black friend's thesis topic, it might seem like a tipping point, but he was one step ahead in using rules and approval for his purposes. None of the Americans bother to stop him, but that doesn't mean that no one stops him. 7. A Hidden Life (Terrence Malick)- "The sun shines on good and evil the same." In the baggy second hour of what might be Terrence Malick's most direct and linear film, martyr Franz Jagerstatter tosses off that line with grace and aplomb, at a time when most of us would have neither to spare. His captors are confused when he denies that his conscientious objection will make any difference in the war or when he doubts that he is more morally evolved than his countrymen. His refusal to pledge an oath to Hitler is a state with no outcome in mind, which the results-obsessed Nazis cannot understand. In that way he is the perfect Malickian hero, which means he is the perfect Heideggerian hero: a man who sees all planes of existence as equal--or at least equally unknowable to him. As a farmer, Franz observes and acts upon cycles, but he is smaller than Nature and the communion he finds with God there. So when he's torn from his family and daily life to be stuck in a prison, he is separated from that concord further and further. The key, however, is that he is no more or less powerful than before, and that knowledge is what gives him transcendental perspective. He is indifferent in the way that only a saint can be. Of course, what I'm describing also makes for a passive protagonist, which is why the cross-cutting to his wife Fani is so effective. She is the one who has to shoulder the burden of his ideals, and Valerie Pachner's stolid performance sells that sacrifice. The overall balance comes from the jagged but precise editing, and the production is all the more impressive for retaining the Malick style despite the absence of most of his regular collaborators. (This is the first time since The Thin Red Line that he hasn't worked with Jack Fisk, but there the production design is, crafting a 1940 Austrian town out of nothing and building a network of water symbolism that I don't understand yet.) In fact, the whirling steadicam and the avoidance of artificial light have more of a thematic purpose than ever if "the sun shines on good and evil all the same." Perhaps the greatest achievement of this film about unjust war is that it made me pray for Donald Trump today. Because if I want to be like Franz Jagerstatter, then I have to believe the light of God shines on him too. 6. Knives Out (Rian Johnson)- A third of the way into this imaginative, absorbing whodunit, I started to talk myself into the surface pleasures of cinema. "So what if it doesn't have much to say; look at these stars going for it with this spicy dialogue and these gleeful twists." Then the subtext asserts itself through a radiant Ana de Armas, and the subtext becomes the text in the final shot. Knives Out is the best of all worlds. Rian Johnson might be the first filmmaker for whom a Star Wars movie ends up being a footnote. 5. Everybody Knows (Asghar Farhadi)- There's a photograph hanging in the library (yes, the stately library) of the patrician family of my childhood best friend, and I'm in that picture. There I am, dressed a bit sloppier than everyone else, near the edge of the frame. Because I was there, as usual, and because they are kind. Everybody Knows is about one of those family friend outsiders, perhaps in a way that no other movie has been. When it's at its best, it's about what those marginal figures can and can't say, can and can't do. The film dips into soap opera territory, but only to sell its message of how secrets beget other secrets. For me, it's another Farhadi hit of approachable, modest conflict that bakes itself into an experience. 4. Marriage Story (Noah Baumbach)- The best divorce movie ever made--by the guy who wrote and directed the former belt holder of the best divorce movie ever made. These luminous lead performances aren't just about saying cutting, hurtful things or reacting to their child's preference for the other parent (or at least the other parent's toys). They're about the internal devastation of realizing you can never take back something you've said. Driver and Johansson each get a chance to sink into one of those moments, and they're joined by a head-tilting, blustery Laura Dern, who gets a Virgin Mary speech that won her an Oscar. And there are jokes! Underrated aspect of the movie: The son is kind of a dipshit. I like that he just hates math and wants to eat candy, as opposed to the cute prodigies we've seen before in this type of movie. They're fighting over a kid only a parent could love. INSTANT CLASSICS

3. Uncut Gems (Josh Safdie and Benny Safdie)- Howard the jeweler lives somewhere in upstate New York, but he has an apartment in the city. It's an apartment that is close enough for him to cab over to his mistress who lives there, but it's far enough away that his family wouldn't bother popping in for a visit. That sort of gap is present throughout Uncut Gems: Family members act differently in the Diamond District than they do at seder, and we first see Howard from the literally vulnerable inside of a colonoscopy, not the animated brio of his tightrope-walking exterior. Of course, the gem of the title is the ultimate division: something pure that the characters are searching for, untouched by the process that Howard, by definition, does. And the film is about how little he can abide by purity. Until now, The Gambler (1974) was probably the best film of this type, a snapshot of a cursed man who seems to be gambling with forces way beyond the game in question. But Uncut Gems is more pathological, more authentic, more intense, and more decisively realized. By focusing more on character than the Safdie Brothers' other work, it offers a unique depiction of compulsive behavior and implicates the audience in rooting for Howard's (technically unrealistic) parlay. By doubling down on his bets or re-uniting with his girlfriend, Howard thinks that he can reinvent himself and start anew. But like the legacy of the Chosen People the film depicts, like the lines on all of these great New York faces, some things are permanent.

2. The Irishman (Martin Scorsese)- "It's what it is." You wouldn't blame someone if he saw the logline and lineup of The Irishman and expected GoodFellas. In fact, this one quotes Scorsese's signature film continually. Instead of slicing onions with a razorblade, old convicts pitch bocce balls. Instead of tracking sumptuously through the Copa, Scorsese's camera wanders through a nursing home. Instead of pistol-whipping Karen's neighbor for getting handsy, our protagonist curb-stomps a grocery owner for shoving his daughter. But there's a GoodFellas staple that is missing. The first fourth of that crime saga closes as Young Henry, played by Christopher Serrone, gets rewarded for staying mum in court. All of his partners in crime cheer him, and he is told that he learned a valuable lesson (in protecting the family and subverting the law). Then we cut to Adult Henry, played by Ray Liotta now, because Young Henry has learned everything he has to know. The Irishman has no such moment of elevation or revelation. Frank is, crucially, played by Robert De Niro over the course of decades because his fall from grace--if there ever was grace--is too imperceptible for any before-and-after divide. The lessons that he learns are just as corrupting as what Henry discovers: Power comes from insularity. Having power means you don't have to prove it. Organized crime, organized labor, and the political process are all the same thing. A code is all a man has, but all codes have limits. However, Frank's corruption, the selling of his soul, doesn't even bring an Asian-inspired chiffonier or a Janice Rossi sidepiece. Frank doesn't get rich; he jams his hands into a plastic ice bucket at the bar next to his couch. He doesn't get powerful; he has to kill because Russell is too prominent to be in the same town as a hit. He doesn't get glory; even a celebration held in his honor is just an excuse for more influential men to do business. Frank is a tool, and he is trapped in a fruitless silence, at best an accessory at meetings. (De Niro is doing quoting of his own. There's a lot of Jackie Brown's Louis in his shrugs and smirks.) As boisterous as Scorsese's films can be, he also knows how to use silence. Robbie Robertson's score is weak, but luckily the film goes without for long stretches, including a suspenseful car ride that begins with a treacherous hug and ends with a malignant secret. The best performance comes from Joe Pesci, probably because his stolid stillness matches the overall atmosphere. Of course, the quietest moments correlate to the loneliest moments: Frank touring a cemetery or sitting with a door half-cracked to a complicit viewer. It's the silence of deliberate toil. Like the mobster ripping up carpet in the lake house, Scorsese is on his hands and knees destroying his own myths.

1. Parasite (Bong Joon-ho)- Parasite is Bong Joon-Ho's masterpiece because it distills the worldview and passions that he previously flirted with into a condensed but elaborate statement. In the same way that Mean Streets is perfectly good but feels like a rehearsal for the slow boil of encircling gangster life in GoodFellas. In the same way that Hitchcock played with the impotent everyman voyeur in a confined setting but didn't perfect it until Rear Window. Like the examples above, Parasite, a true ensemble, is a case of the subtext becoming text. Back in his native country and language, working more or less with realism, Bong is free to take aim at class in a more direct but still wacky way. In all of its crowd provocation--there's so much pleasure in just a suspenseful winding down stairs--the film is destined to be a foreign film gateway drug. But really it just makes we want to take a half-star off my Snowpiercer review since I know Bong can do better now.

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naruwitch · 5 years ago

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Code Geass: Paladins of Voltron Chapter 9: The Fall of the Castle of Lions

"The monster fell from the sky! It was an epic battle, but Voltron was victorious!" The Arusian King exclaimed from the stairs. Three Arusians were on top of each other, seven others were standing on each other with a sword and shield. They were reenacting the battle that Voltron had fought just the previous day. Allura had announced that they would be leaving the planet tomorrow, but as thanks, had invited the Arusian village to the Castle for a farewell feast and party.

The three Arusians threw a ball at the seven, and they ended up collapsing underneath. "...No! I said Voltron was victorious!" The seven Arusians quickly leaped back to their feet as the three collapsed in defeat. The rest of the Arusians cheered and raised their drinking goblets as the Princess watched in amusement.

"Thank you, Your Majesty, for that…" she raised an eyebrow and grimaced slightly, "...wonderful production," she then changed to the most innocent smile she could. "It saddens me that we must leave tomorrow, but we must continue our battle with Zarkon and spread peace throughout the universe." She then turned to the King himself, her hands clasped, "Your Highness… Please accept this gift," she opened her hands to reveal an Altean communicator. The king took the device apprehensively, "This will allow you to contact us anytime you need help." The king smiled in gratitude, "Arus will be the first planet in the Voltron Alliance."

"Hoorah!" the King exclaimed, holding the communicator in the air as his subjects cheered again.

Milly, Rivalz, and Shirley were in a little group in the crowd, holding small cups of their own.

"You know, we should get something like that," Shirley said.

"Like what?" Rivalz asked, confused.

"You know, like a cheer. Like, a team cheer that we do," the Orange Paladin clarified.

"Oh! I like where you're going with that, Shirley!" Milly giggled, "Hmmm… how about: I say 'Vol' and you say 'Tron.' Vol-"

"-Tron!" the two exclaimed.

"Vol-"

"-Tron!"

"YES! It's perfect! Now we just need the others in on it!" Milly winked before sipping her drink-before immediately spitting it back into her cup, a full-body shiver followed. She zipped over to Coran, a peeved look on her face, "Coran, what is this?!"

"Oh, this is Nunvill, the Nectar of the Gods," the advisor smiled after sipping his glass.

Milly stuck out her tongue, disgusted, "It tastes more like hotdog water and feet!"

Missing the disgust in her tone, Coran smiled, "Yeah, makes a wonderful hair tonic as well." He stuck his hand in the glass before sprinkling some onto his mustache, causing it to fluff up, before sliding gracefully away. Despite trying to maintain manners, this only caused the Ashford President to gag again.

Kallen was leaning against the wall, afar off from the crowd, scowling. She never was much of a party person to begin with, but her mind was on other things as well. It had now been officially four to five days since they all went missing. She'd be shocked if the news hadn't caught wind of their disappearances by now. She knew her step-mom knew she snuck out of the house now and then, but the longest she'd ever stayed away was about thirty-six hours. She was probably one of the first to contact authorities. Not because she loved Kallen, but to save her name and reputation.

Not to mention the Black Knights and Zero. She was their most potent Knightmare pilot. With her gone, they would have to find a way to compensate for their loss. And it wouldn't be good on their end. Plus, she shivered, Ohgi was probably worried sick about her as well. Just like-

Kallen sighed and stared up at the ceiling. She hated to admit it, but she missed her mom. Her real mom. Who worked and endured ridicule in the Stadtfeld home just to stay by her. Why couldn't that woman just move on and get a life already?

"I'm sorry guys…" she whispered, continuing to brood in the corner.

Meanwhile, Shirley and Rivalz were attempting to assist Milly, who was still having problems with the Nunvill drink. Rivalz poked her, where she fell, rather comedically on her side.

Rai and Suzaku were also standing apart from the crowd. But for entirely different reasons than Kallen. They were tense as if waiting for a whole army of Galra to come barging in through the wide-open gates.

"Not feeling well?" Coran asked them as he approached the two, "Try some Nunvill. Settles the stomach and brightens your smile."

"Coran, I don't think it's a good idea to be letting everyone wander in and out of the Castle like this. It doesn't seem safe." Suzaku admitted.

"Oh, these Arusian won't hurt anything-"

Coran was interrupted as two Arusians came floating by, hanging from a hovering plate of drinks.

"-Much." he cringed as the platter collided with another one. "Besides, it's only fair to let them see the inside of a castle that's been sitting on their planet for so long."

"Okay, but who knows when Zarkon will attack again?" Rai asked pointedly.

Suzaku pushed himself away from the wall, "I'm gonna do a perimeter check. Just in case. Coming Rai?"

"Sure!" the Green Paladin said, following close behind.

o~o

Meanwhile, far across the way from the Castle, two adversaries laid in wait for the perfect opportunity to strike.

"Commander Sendak, the sentries are in position around the Arusian village," Haxus said.

Sendak grinned. He was eager to gain revenge on the Paladins and kill the Princess personally. Emperor Zarkon would reward him generously for doing so. He zoomed in to get a better look at the castle with his unique Galra eye.

"Luck is on our side. Look, the Castle defenses are down. The door is wide open. With all these Arusians coming in and out, it should be nothing for you to infiltrate."

Haxus looked through his binoculars and spotted Rai walking around with Rover, the drone that he had reprogramed. "I may not have to. Look. The green one has a Galra drone they've repurposed. If I can just get close enough to clone its signature code, I can send our bomb drone in undetected."

Sendak grinned sinisterly, "I knew you would not disappoint me, Haxus."

Haxus got up from his crouch next to him and left to find a spot closer to the entrance, to fulfill the plan.

o~o

As everyone was having fun and socializing, Lelouch finally emerged and was out carrying around a small backpack, discreetly stocking it with some of the food from the party.

Up above, Allura gazed down at the paladins with a smile, with the light blue mouse, Plachu, perched on her shoulder, "Look at them, the new Paladins of Voltron. The fate of the universe is on their shoulders."

She watched as Shirley took a drink of Nunvill. Her eyes widened impossibly before she spewed it out in Rivalz's face, his head ducked down as if to cover his eyes.

"Ow! My eyes!" Rivalz exclaimed with a cackle as he had put two of the stick snacks into his sockets. The two, along with Milly and the Arusians surrounding them, threw back their heads laughing.

Allura cocked an eyebrow at the display. Not exactly the most proper Paladin behavior, but she saw that they weren't necessarily causing trouble, and allowed it to slide. "... I must portray strength so no one can tell how concerned I am about the fate of our mission."

Plachu chittered close to her ear as he perched on her shoulder. Allura's eyes widened before she blushed and smiled sheepishly, "Let's... keep that a secret."

He chittered again quietly. Allura's face became intrigued. "Who else has secrets?"

Plachu leaped down and joined his siblings on the ramp. He then took Platt's cheeks and squished them upwards like he was trying to eat something he probably should've ate in smaller bites.

"Rivalz tried to eat what?!" Allura laughed, "That is rather amusing. What other secrets?"

The tiny mouse, Chulatt, hopped onto Plachu's head and styled his hair to look curly like Milly's. He then grabbed his tail and, with a devious smirk, spun it around like a lasso.

Allura frowned slightly, "That sounds like something Milly would attempt."

Chulatt then dropped down back to the ramp, and standing in front of Chuchule, the pink mouse, offered his paw out to her. Chuchule placed it there, and Chulatt lightly kissed it, as Chuchule batted her eyes and gave a flattering squeak.

"Lelouch is a what?!" Allura reeled back in shock. She quickly zeroed in on the Black Paladin, who was in the process of casually dumping another plate of snacks into his backpack. He suddenly frowned and looked around. He spotted a stray wooden pick in one of the snacks that an Arusian was carrying. He even proceeded to dig it between two of his canines before pulling it out. He frowned before tossing it behind him, apparently satisfied.

Allura scowled skeptically, as she doubted even by Earth standards that that was how royalty acted. "Hmmm...Are you sure?" she asked. The mice squeaked in confirmation, "I'm getting to the bottom of this."

Meanwhile, back down below, Rivalz stared skeptically at the Nunvill still in his cup. "I guess we should get used to this space juice. Who knows when we'll get back home again?"

"Yeah…" Milly frowned, swirling her cup. "If ever…"

"It's our new life," Kallen suddenly snapped next to them, "get used to it!"

"What do you mean, Kallen?" Shirley asked.

"Well think about it, if this Zarkon character has been ruling for 10,000 years, how long do you think it will take for us to fix it? You know, if we live through it?"

"You're right…" Shirley frowned, picking up a bowl of food as a tray floated past.

Kallen rolled her eyes and sighed again. 'Seriously?! Can they not understand that?!' she ranted as she slinked back into the crowd.

"You know… ever since we got here, Kallen's been acting like a completely different person." Shirley said.

"Yeah," Rivalz nodded, "what happened to the sick, frail Kallen Stadtfeld we know? It's like she's never been sick! Not to say that's bad! If anything, I think it's a big improvement. She's a lot more attractive now."

"True, definitely love the spikes she's added to her locks," Milly commented.

"Kallen has a point, though…" Shirley murmured. "It could take forever for us to fight Zarkon. And who knows what will happen. Some of us might not come back!"

"Yeah. Right." Rivalz nodded solemnly.

"But hey! What do you think the chances are of us landing on another glitter planet?" Milly asked, trying to change the subject to cheer them up. "Oh! Or a planet made up completely out of nachos? That would be one for the journals!"

"Well, there's only one planet with beautiful beaches, pizza shack looking over the water, and the garlic knots and... my mom's hugs…" Rivalz eyes started flooding with tears before ducking his head, "I'm sorry. I think this Nunvill is getting to me. I gotta go."

Milly and Shirley looked after him in concern. Coran also watched him go up the stairs with a concerned frown, the conversation he was having with two Arusians briefly forgotten.

As Rivalz was hurrying up the stairs, Allura passed him coming down, making a beeline for Lelouch, his backpack still flung over his shoulder.

"So, Lelouch," Allura started, trying to sound casual, "we haven't had a chance to really... talk. Tell me about yourself."

Lelouch blinked in confusion for a moment, wondering why the sudden interest, but he sighed and relented, thinking a couple of facts should satisfy her. "Hmmm… well, my favorite color is indigo, I prefer turkey over ham sandwiches, and my favorite tea is jasmine, with a small dollop of honey in it. I also like peanut butter and peanut butter cookies. But I refuse to eat peanuts on their own. They're far too dry and salty."

Lelouch tried to escape from the princess after that, figuring that was enough. Allura blocked his path, "I-I suppose I was thinking of something a little more... personal?" She asked with a knowing wink. That sounded suspicious to him. "We do have a lot in common."

Lelouch's eyes widened in alarm. Then they narrowed as his Geass activated, "What do you mean?" he demanded as the sigil flew into Allura's eyes.

The princess's eyes glowed with a red ring around the iris as her face went slack. "I mean that fact that we are both prince and princess of royalty," she replied monotonously.

Lelouch gasped before he grit his teeth in anger, "How'd you find out about that?!"

"The mice told me. They overheard a conversation with you and C.C. about it."

Lelouch sighed. That was his fault then. The fact that the mice shared a mental link with the princess completely slipped his memory. Satisfied that he had the information, he broke the command off.

Allura blinked before she refocused on Lelouch, and then noticed his strangely aggravated face. She quickly backtracked, "I'm sorry! I overstepped my bounds. I just want you to know that you can confide in me. If there's anything you ever want to talk about..." She leaned in uncomfortably close to Lelouch's face, "Anything…"

Though a little irritated, he might as well say it now, since she was technically asking. "Fine, I do have something to tell you."

"I had a feeling~" Allura sang with a giddy smile, "What is it?"

"I'm leaving Voltron, and going back to Earth."

Allura took a breath like she was about to speak something else entirely different. Her mouth turned into a confused frown, "Wait, what?!"

"You heard correctly; I'm going back to Earth. With C.C. Tonight," he informed with a tone of finality.

"Lelouch, you can't. You're one of seven Paladins," her hands landed on Lelouch's shoulders, "You have a sacred trust to defend the universe."

"Well, I regret to tell you, Princess, but I have previous engagements and priorities back home!" Lelouch exclaimed, back away defensively, "Tell me, did you have any other family besides your parents? A brother or sister, perhaps?"

"Well- no but-!" Allura protested.

"Well, I do!" Lelouch exclaimed, "My mother is dead, and my father abandoned my sister and I. She's blind and crippled. She can't move unless she uses a wheelchair! She needs help with almost everything! Don't you get it?! If I'm not there for her, who will be?! And I'll die first before I let my father get his filthy hands on her again!"

Allura stood in frozen shock. She had never seen Lelouch this emotional about something. Where was the calm, stoic, Black Paladin she was familiar with?

He drew in a sharp breath, eyes glossy with tears, "I'm sorry. But I should inform the others about this."

o~o

Outside, Rai and Suzaku stood guard at the entrance, squinting out into the darkness. Rover was hovering closer to them, assisting in patrol.

"Rai, Suzaku?" Lelouch asked as he came up behind them.

"What's up, Lelouch?" Suzaku asked.

"I need to talk to you about something."

Off to the side, however, no one noticed the galra Haxus hiding in the rocky outcroppings. He leaned out and pointed a device at the drone and trio. It quickly scanned them as the three started walking back to the Castle. It got full encryption of the drones codes, which he promptly prepared a copy of it.

"Signature code cloned," he muttered. He quickly pulled back behind the rocks when Rai looked over in his directions with narrowed eyes. The two then followed Lelouch back into the castle. He pulled out a drone of his own and scanned the code into it. Its glow went from red to bright blue, copying Rover's code perfectly. "Bomb activated."

The fake Rover started hovering towards the entrance, following the trio from a short distance as Haxus leaped over the rocks and retreated to Sendak's position. Now all they needed to do was wait.

o~o

Rivalz sat sulking in the castle's bridge. His head was rested on one of his fists as thoughts rolled through his head. He missed his mom, sisters, uncle, and baby cousin. What Kallen said struck closer to home than he anticipated, because she was right! This was war! People died, and who was to say that he wouldn't be one of them?

"Mind if I join you?" Coran asked gently as he hopped down from the platform Rivalz was sitting against.

"How far away from Earth do you think we are, Coran?" Rivalz asked. Maybe if he saw the distance, and that it wasn't far at all, it could reassure him.

"Let's take a look," Coran went up to the central control and brought up the holographic map, the planets, and stars surrounding them.

"Earth is over here," Coran said, pointing to the space that they marked for the paladins, "And we're aaaaaaall... the waaaaay... oveeeeer..." The kept swiping his hand over the map. It seemed to take forever. And it didn't help Rivalz's sudden homesickness at all.

"You ever notice how far the planets are from each other, Coran?" he asked forlornly.

"Yes," Coran replied, still swiping, "haven't you been paying attention?"

"Yeah," Rivalz walked up next to him, "but I mean, like, they're really, really far away. Like, say, Earth? It's so far; I can't even see it. The... The blue oceans, the white clouds, green grass... I c—-I-I... I can't see any of it!" he confessed, looking down with a depressed gaze.

Coran gazed at the Blue Paladin with sympathy, "You miss Earth. I understand. I miss Altea."

"I know we're supposed to be brave Paladins and Defenders of the Universe or whatever, but, honestly? I just want to go home." Rivalz complained as he looked down, depressed stare still prominent.

"If I could go home, I would," Coran confessed, looking down and sad as well now.

"I miss the rain," Rivalz said randomly, "and splashing in puddles."

"Rain?" Coran asked, intrigued.

"Yeah. It's water that falls from the sky?" Rivalz provided, looking up at their Milky Way Galaxy.

"Oh, we had that on Altea. Only, it wasn't water, more like rocks. Razor-sharp and boiling-hot. Oh, they could knock a hole right in your head."

"Sounds fun," Rivalz said unenthusiastically.

"Yeah."

o~o

The Galra drone that was rigged continued to fly down the hall completely undetected. It scanned each place as it went, looking for a convenient place to go off. Its destination was the bridge, where the primary power source of the Castle was. Once that was taken out, the Castle would be completely defenseless.

o~o

"Lelouch, no!" Suzaku exclaimed. He, Rai, Allura, and the other Paladins, except Rivalz, were gathered in one of the halls. Lelouch had just broken to them the news of his departure.

"Nunnally needs me Suzaku," Lelouch said, "and I have other things I need to do on Earth. And besides, with the way things are right now, should the Galra attack, no one would stand a chance, not even Britannia."

"Lelouch, you can't just leave!" Milly argued, putting her hands on her hips.

"We're not in school, Milly, so you can't tell me what to do. Besides, C.C. and I have a pod ready to go already. She's probably waiting for me."

"Okay, seriously, Lelouch, what's with you and that C.C. chick?!" Kallen suddenly exclaimed angrily, "She sneaks onto the Blue Lion, following you, and now you're leaving with her?!"

"And if you leave, Lelouch, we can't form Voltron!" Rai said, angry as well, "And that means we can't defend the universe against Zarkon. You're not the only one with a family; we all have one. All these Arusians have families. Everyone in the universe has families. My mom and sister are still out there as well, you know!"

"Yeah, I have a family. They live on Earth. I want to be with them. Is that��Is that, like, a thing that can happen?" Shirley spoke up timidly.

"You want to leave, too?" Allura asked, aghast.

"Of course I do. Look, Voltron is super-cool, don't get me wrong, but I never signed up for a lifetime in space fighting aliens." Shirley said, trying to make Allura understand.

"Lelouch," Milly said, "I care about Nunnally as well. We all do. But think about the bigger picture. You're putting the life of one person over the lives of everyone else in the entire galaxy—!"

"—Guys, wait!" Suzaku finally spoke, "This isn't how a team should operate. People have to want to be a part of it. They can't be forced," Suzaku looked at Lelouch, with a small desperate gleam in his eye, "Lelouch, If you want to leave, we won't try to stop you. But, please, just think about what you're doing."

Lelouch inhaled deeply, "I'm sorry, but you need to find someone else to pilot the Black Lion."

As Lelouch started walking away, Kallen suddenly caught up to him, grabbing his arm, "Fine! Then I'm going with you too!"

"Wha- Kallen!" Allura protested.

"Look," Kallen interrupted, "I hate the idea of leaving this too. But he has a point. Our world right now is completely unprepared for an attack. We need to at least warn them! So that's what we'll do," she then walked up to the princess and whispered, "and maybe I can convince him to come back."

Allura gasped slightly as Lelouch, and now Kallen both started walking away.

"I can't believe it. This team is falling apart. How will we ever form Voltron?"

o~o

Rivalz and Coran were finally leaving the bridge when the fake Rover came hovering in. They had a good talk about their homeworlds, and Rivalz had to admit he was feeling a bit better.

"Hey, Rover!" he greeted as it passed him. It continued in its path until it stopped right next to the crystal.

Rivalz suddenly stopped, noticing something crucial. "Wait… Where's Rai?" he asked as he turned around slowly.

As he looked back at the drone, it suddenly started beeping and flashing red.

Rivalz gasped, realizing what was happening.

"Coran, look out!" He shouted, tackling the Altean as the drone exploded in an inferno.

o~o

The explosion was felt throughout the Castle. The Arusians panicked and started running in all directions and out of the Castle. Suzaku, Rai, Milly, Shirley, and Allura all gasped in horror as small pieces of debris fell around them. Lelouch, Kallen, and C.C., who had been waiting in the shuttle for them, also paused, staring in terror.

Soon the lights on the Castle of Lions flickered out. No power was flowing from any part of the ship. They were now truly stuck.

o~o

Coran groaned as he slowly got up. The bridge was dark; smoke was gently cascading around him. He blinked several times until he figured out what he was seeing. He heard footsteps as Allura, C.C., and the other Paladins ran into the rooming, some coughing from the smoke.

"What happened?!" Lelouch exclaimed as Suzaku and Kallen helped Coran up.

"Ugh… I'm not sure," Coran said as he stood up. The smoke slowly cleared to confirm Allura's worst fear, though.

"The Crystal!" It was in shards everywhere. Their power was gone, and therefore, nothing was going to work until they got a new one. What was even more horrifying, however, was the still figure almost directly underneath it.

"Rivalz!" the Princess gasped.

Rai ran forward and gently picked up the Blue Paladin, cradling his neck, "Rivalz?" The Blue Paladin groaned in pain, "Rivalz!"

"We have to get Rivalz to the infirmary!" Shirley exclaimed.

"Without the Crystal, the Castle has no power," Allura said frantically.

"Meaning that those healing pods won't work either," Lelouch said before cursing.

"He doesn't look good…" Milly said, kneeling next to Rai, tears gathering in her eyes.

"Lion warriors, our village is under attack!" the Arusian King cried, running into the room, "We need help!"

"Let's get to the Lions!" Suzaku said.

"You can't. They're sealed in their hangars. There's no way to get them out. We're defenseless," Allura explained frantically.

"Will you not help us?!" the king asked, eyes shifting between the Paladins in a panic.

"We will. We just-"

Rivalz groaned in pain again, interrupting Kallen. She looked back at her friend, biting her lip.

"Well… this is quite the predicament," C.C. said as if she was talking about the weather.

Ignoring the immortal's tone, Coran straightened himself, taking his arm away from Shirley, who had had it draped over her shoulder.

"We have to get a new Crystal to get the Castle working again. But, to get a new Crystal, we need a ship."

"Use the pod we were loading," Lelouch said, pointing down the hall they came from, "the bay door should still be open!"

"I can use the scanner on the pod to see if there's a Balmera nearby. Shirley, C.C., you both come with me. I'll need some help with carrying the Crystal."

"You're making women do all the heavy lifting? How very ungentleman-like of you," C.C. quipped sarcastically, casually crossing her arms.

"A Balmera?" Shirley asked, sounding out the strange word.

"It's where the Crystals come from. I'll tell you two about it on the way!" the advisor said as he, Shirley, C.C., Kallen, and Lelouch exited the room for the hanger.

"I'll go see what's happening at the Arusian village," Suzaku said to Milly and Rai.

"I'll go with you, Suzaku. I brought this on the poor Arusians." Allura said, a layer of guilt in her tone.

"Okay, we'll look after Rivalz and guard the Castle." the Green Paladin said.

o~o

Coran, Shirley, and C.C. had gotten settled in the pod as the advisor turned the scanner on. Lelouch and Kallen were standing outside it.

"It's our first bit of luck," the Altean said, looking at the star map, "There's a source not too far. We won't need a wormhole to get there, thankfully."

Shirley quickly adjusted her helmet as the screen lit up with the path to take.

"Hold on; Rai's been doing some tinkering around here. He told me he added some modifications to some of the shuttles. I'll try and explain them the best I can," Lelouch said, leaning in and pointing at one of the screens. "The first change is a cloaking device that he reverse-engineered from the invisible walls on the training deck. The second is a tank of booster fuel that he mounted on the fuel line."

Coran, however, didn't look very impressed with the second option, "Using that during flight would turn the whole pod into a bomb!"

Shirley paled considerably, and even C.C. looked a little nervous. Not to say she'd never been blown up before, but the experience was never pleasant. And especially not out in space.

"Oh-kay, maybe refrain from using that modification then," Lelouch said, looking a little apologetic. "Mental note, have Rai take it off the shuttles ASAP when this is done."

"Ya think?" Kallen asked sarcastically.

"Are we ready, then?" Shirley asked Coran.

"Yes, let's go!" Coran lowered the pod window as it prepared for take-off. The engines ignited, and it hovered as it approached the bay doors.

"Good luck!" Lelouch said, giving Shirley a smile and thumbs up. Kallen waved after them.

From inside the pod, Shirley blushed and sent a thumbs-up back before it shot out the doors and into the Arusian night sky.

o~o

Meanwhile, Rai and Milly were slowly transporting Rivalz to the medical wing. Milly was holding his legs while Rai had hoisted him up by the shoulders. They planned to use some of the other supplies inside and their limited knowledge of medical treatment to try and help heal some of the wounds.

"Hang on buddy, help's on the way," Rai said. He stumbled when Milly came to an abrupt stop. She was staring at the entrance to the Castle, petrified. Rai followed her gaze, and his blood ran cold. There was a small Galra troop coming towards them. They were dragging a large purple crystal behind them, and the one leading the assault was-

"Sendak!" Rai snarled, gritting his teeth.

"He's still alive," Milly whispered. The two Paladins quickly guided Rivalz body to lie down by the wall.

"Stay here!" Rai said as he raced for the entrance. He met the Galra outside and was the only thing standing between him and the Castle. Both parties stopped.

"Stand aside," Sendak said as the two continued the standoff.

"No!" Rai shouted, whipping out his Bayard in a flash of light, readying himself for battle, "You're not getting in!"

"Yes, I am." Sendak thrust his robot arm out towards the Green Paladin. Rai raised his arms to block, but the arm actually grabbed him and dragged him further outside towards the Galra forces. Rai was dragged along the ground with a yell before landing right in front of Sendak. He barely had time to dodge backward as the large arm came crashing down on the ground.

Rai grunted as he pulled out his Bayard again, this time igniting it to full charge. He ran forward with a battle cry, arm ready to swing his Bayard inward. Sendak raised his arm to block, and the katar scraped across its surface, not even scratching it! He quickly leaped up and swung again, causing Sendak to have to step back to dodge. Rai ducked and rolled out of the way of another strike, flipping backward to get out of range.

He roared again as he sent a frontal attack forward, the Bayard crackling with electricity. Sendak's fist also returned with an onslaught of his own, punching his metal hand in Rai's direction. The attacks clashed, the two stuck in a stalemate, though Rai was starting to pant a little.

Sendak's eye narrowed before widening, his robot one whirling. He then smirked, "I see you spent some time with the Druids. They do love to experiment. Too bad you're letting such an ability go to waste."

"Huh?" Rai blinked. What was he talking about? He didn't get the chance to ask this though as the Sendak's arm fluctuated and launched the Green Paladin backward into the Castle. Rai skidded and tumbled back to where Milly and Rivalz were hiding.

"Rai!" Milly gasped as he finally stopped next to them. She couldn't inspect his injuries, as they both had to jump away from Sendak's arm again. It slammed so hard into the ground it left a small crater, and the force sent the two Paladins tumbling back. Sendak was already using the momentum of his attack to propel himself at them again. This time though, Rai managed to grab Sendak by the shoulder and throw him away from them. The Galra roared in fury as Rai ran at him again, Bayard activated. The two were soon locked in another stalemate, Rai's Bayard by Sendak's neck and Sendak's claws under Rai's chin. If either one of them made a move, they were as good as dead.

"No!" Milly cried out from behind him. Turning around, Rai saw that some sentries had grabbed Rivalz and had thrown him to the ground. Milly was standing behind Rai, surrounded, her Bayard out in its kusarigama form. She looked like she was going to attack, but Haxus was also holding a gun to the Blue Paladin's head, looking her in the eye, daring her to try.

Milly looked back at Rai, terror plain to see on her face. This moment of distraction was enough for Sendak to launch Rai forward, catching the Yellow Paladin off balance and knocking them both unconscious. The two collapsed right by their fallen comrade, prisoners of war to the Galra.

"Voltron is ours," Sendak proclaimed with a sinister grin.

o~o

"Damn!" Lelouch whispered as he and Kallen hid behind the balcony.

"What do we do?!" Kallen asked urgently.

"Let's get out of here. It won't help anyone if we're caught as well," the Black Paladin said as the two scrambled down the hallway. Lelouch's brain worked furiously to come up with a plan to get the Galra out of the Castle and save the others in time.

o~o

The Arusian village was in flames. Blasts from guns desecrating the structures and leaving the homes of the people in ruins. The King and his people could only watch in terror as everything was slowly engulfed. Suzaku and Allura quickly joined them at the top.

"What's happening?" Allura asked.

"Look! Attackers!" the King pointed towards the town square. There were multiple Galra sentries with blasters in their hands, and explosions went off in many directions.

"I'll go in for a closer look. Stay here with them," Suzaku ordered as he slid down the wall, gritting his teeth.

"Suzaku!" Allura called out in alarm.

The Purple Paladin leaped into the blaze, using his jet pack to slow his descent. He sneaked through the burning village, hiding behind buildings in case he was attacked… and he wasn't. Warning bells went off in his head as he got closer to the square. He looked through the window of one of the huts, well hidden from the sentries. As the watertower crashed to the ground, one of the droids also fell to its side, limp.

Suzaku blinked, "What?!" Now that he had a closer look, he saw that all of the sentries were damaged and not operating. Some of them were even mounted on stilts and had their arms wrapped around their guns with cloth.

His eyes suddenly widened in realization, "Oh no! They tricked us!"

Allura's face paled as Suzaku's voice rang into her ears through her earrings, "It was just a diversion to separate us and thin the Castle's defenses!" Allura whipped her head around, her eyes widening in terror as she gazed at the defenseless castle.

o~o

Inside the Castle, the working sentries plugged the Galra crystal into the Castle's central power system.

"Power up the Castle," Sendak order, the symbol of the Galra Empire flashed to life on the screens. The once soothing blue lights of the Castle of Lions was soon flooded with a sinister violet. Even the lights outside had switched to match its new master's.

o~o

As the system reactivated, the screens on all the Lion hangers flashed to life, showing all seven felines sitting dormant in their chambers. The Galran commander smirked cruelly in victory. "The Lions are all in their bays. Raising particle barrier. Begin launch sequence."

Suzaku and Allura ran as fast as their legs could carry them as the now violet particle barrier descended over the Castle. The wall slammed to the ground just as the two collided with it. Suzaku slammed his fist against it, but it didn't budge.

"We're too late… No!" Suzaku shouted in anger.

"They have control of the Castle. They're taking Voltron!" Allura gasped in fear.

o~o

After checking over the crystal one last time, and glancing at his three unconscious prisoners, Sendak turned to Haxus, "Make contact with Emperor Zarkon."

His fellow Galra nodded and pressed a few buttons on the holopads. The screen in the middle blinked to life as a link was made. Soon the Emperor's sinister face flashed onto the screen.

"Sendak," he acknowledged.

"My mission is complete," Sendak debriefed, grinning in triumph, "I've captured the Altean castle, along with all of the Voltron Lions. I am currently preparing for launch and will be delivering them all to you shortly."

"This news is most pleasing," Zarkon said, showing little expression, "You've done your duty. Vrepit Sa!"

"Vrepit Sa!" saluted as the communication ended, "Haxus, ready the Castle for take off."

"Yes, Commander."

o~o

Suzaku morphed his Bayard to its katana form, looking at Allura desperately, "Can we break through the barrier?"

"No. And whoever has taken the Castle has a Crystal, which means they'll be able to fly the ship. We have to stop them," she answered.

"How are we going to do that?" he asked.

"Suzaku, can you hear me?"

The Purple Paladin gasped at the voice, "Lelouch?! Is that you?!"

"Yes, Kallen's with me as well."

"Where are you two?"

"We're inside the Castle. We managed to evade capture… for now," the Britannian Prince answered.

"Sendak has taken over, and he's preparing for launch. He's got Rai, Milly, and Rivalz." Kallen added in the same hushed tone. Rover, who they ran into as they escaped down the hallway, was hovering next to them.

"Lelouch, Kallen, listen. If they've started the launch sequence, then we don't have much time before liftoff to stop it." Allura informed them urgently.

"Tell us what to do," Lelouch ordered.

"You have to get down to the main engine control panel and disconnect the primary turbine from the Central Energy Chamber," Allura instructed.

o~o

Inside, Lelouch tapped his armor gauntlet, pulling up a screen. It contained a map of the Castle's interior. He pushed a couple more commands, and soon a red path lead him to the chamber the princess was talking about.

"If you can do that, Sendak will have to reset the whole system. That might give us enough time to find a way to stop them."

Lelouch glanced at Kallen. They both nodded before shooting up from their hiding place and running down the hall. At that very moment, the fate of the very universe rested on their shoulders.

o~o

Shirley never knew how alone she felt until the pod was finally out of range of the Castle. She felt the bond she shared with Orange (they had to come up with some better names for their Lions) fade and then disappear as they traveled through the stars. Now being alone in her own mind felt… weird. Like a crucial part of her spirit, her very being had been removed. She shivered as the sensation seemed to deepen the more they traveled.

"Are we almost there?" C.C. asked from the back seat. She sounded bored.

"Almost, don't get your hair in a knot. It's not safe to pilot this pod any faster," Coran said.

Finally, a planet that had several large rock pikes and edged mountain ranges came into view.

"Is that the Balmera planet with the crystals?" Shirley asked.

"It's not a planet. Balmera are ancient animals. Petrified, but still alive," Coran informed her. Shirley looked out in shock at the 'animal' they were propelling closer towards. She had no idea that creatures this big existed. Even C.C. looked intrigued at this revelation.

"Their bodies naturally create the crystals that help power many Altean ships. I often accompanied my grandfather to visit these majestic creatures when he was building the Castle of Lions," Coran reminisced. The pod screen pulled up a picture of a Balmera from 10,000 years ago, the ground sparkled with blue crystals. "I'll never forget the first time I saw the sparkling surface of a Balmera. You're both in for quite a treat."

As they finally broke through the cloud surface; however, it wasn't sparkling landscapes that greeted them, but a wasteland with large, dark-colored machinery drilled into the Balmera's surface.

"Oh, no!" Coran gasped, as they flew over several gaping holes in the surface, some more reinforced than others, "This is horrifying! The Galra have turned this into a mining colony! Oh, they're completely destroying it! They have no regard for the poor creature!"

"Incoming, we've been spotted," C.C. informed the Altean as a large shadow drew over them.

"Hailing unidentified craft. State your ship ID, entry code, and landing destination," the ship's robotic voice demanded as it hovered over them.

"Um… what do we do?" Shirley asked, starting to panic.

Before Coran could reply, C.C. leaned forward, "Hailing Galra aircraft," she spoke monotonously, "this is ship number XG21G2D4. Requesting permission to land at once."

"There's no ship of that number expected to come through here," the voice said, the ship descending to almost being on top of them, "land immediately and prepare to be boarded."

"With pleasure," C.C. smirked before turning to Coran, who was looking at her with an expression of shock. A similar expression was on Shirley's face as well, "See you down below."

Coran blinked before it understanding C.C.'s silent message as he yanked back on the control handle. The pod rocketed backward from underneath the ship. Shirley held on for dear life as she screamed in terror, while C.C. braced herself against the wall.

The shuttle swerved left and right to avoid the blasts from the pursuing Galra ship.

Then Coran had an idea, "Not done yet. Hang on!"

The pod pitched downward into one of the gaping holes in the Balmera. It was large enough that the ship would've fit comfortably in the middle, longwise. Shirley continued to scream as they descended at breakneck speed into the abyss.

It was about thirty seconds of straight diving before the Orange Paladin eventually got control of herself enough to ask, "How deep is this thing?!"

"Look out!" C.C. cried as one of the beams appeared right in front of them. Coran managed to swerve the pod out of the way just in time. It barely missed knicking the post.

The swerve did cause Coran to lose control of the pod, though. The trio tumbled the rest of the way down before landing ungracefully at the bottom with a lurch.

Shirley sat there in shock for about a solid minute before having the courage and strength to move again. The window of the pod flickered out as the passengers groaned from the impact. C.C. could already feel the bruises forming on her immortal body.

Shirley wrenched off her helmet, her hair flowing down her back (as she didn't have time to pull it into a bun or ponytail) and looked around the bottom of the crater. She could barely see the light of the surface above them. She gazed to her right, which had a small tunnel leading away from the crash site.

She froze and grabbed her Bayard as two sets of glowing yellow eyes stared back at her.

"Uh, Coran. What lives at the bottom of these mines?"

o~o

Back at the Castle of Lions, Kallen used her clawed Bayard to wrench the elevator shaft doors open. She shoved against them with her feet and back. She panted as Lelouch looked over her leg and down toward the shaft below. Rover hovered over them, before positioning himself above the center of the shaft.

"Okay, here goes nothing," Lelouch leaped forward, using his jetpack to propel him and jumped across the chasm to the lower ledge underneath. Kallen grunted, letting the doors slam closed before following after him. The faithful robot drone quickly tailed behind them in case they needed help.

o~o

"Run main cluster activation sequence," Sendak ordered.

"Activation sequence initiated," Haxus confirmed. "Powering up for launch."

o~o

After wrenching another pair of doors open, the two paladins, though exhausted, finally made it to the Central Energy Chamber. The ball of pure energy was alight with a blue glow.

"Okay, Princess, we're near the turbine," Lelouch said.

"It looks like its started!" Kallen added.

o~o

"Then you'll have to hurry," Allura said, "Cross the catwalk to the main column in the center."

o~o

The two Paladins panted as they sprinted to the center column. They couldn't afford to waste any more time!

"Okay, we're there," Kallen said.

"Now open the hatch," Allura instructed. Lelouch bent down and removed the covering and looked inside, "Find the central computer control hub and enter the following sequence..."

"Princess, wait! Which is it? All these labels are in Altean!" Lelouch snapped, cursing at himself for not learning at least some basic Altean while he was here.

o~o

"Commander Sendak, we are ready for launch," Haxus said, looking at the commander.

o~o

The orb in the center of the chamber suddenly pulsed, large bolts of energy hitting it at once. The turbine was powering up, which only meant one thing! It was about to launch.

"Argh! I can't tell which one it is!" Lelouch shouted.

"Allura! Allura?! Dammit!" Kallen cursed as the link lost the connection.

o~o

"I've lost connection with them!" Allura exclaimed as she and Suzaku backed up in horror, "Oh no! It's taking off!"

o~o

Lelouch was still kneeling in front of the control panel, trying to make heads and tails of the connections. For all, he knew if he adjusted the wrong one-

He was thrown backward as Kallen got in the way. Her Bayard claws were extended.

"What are you-!"

"The hell with this!" Kallen screamed as she buried her claw into the circuits. She was shocked backward, almost hitting Lelouch. She groaned and held her arm, as it felt like it was on fire, her Bayard bouncing away.

"Kallen! Are you alright?!" Lelouch asked, kneeling next to her.

"Peachy!" she hissed sarcastically, glaring at him. Kallen's impulsive maneuver seemed to work though, as the turbine's sound subsided, energy levels dropped, and the energy ball in the center decreased to about an eighth of its original size.

"Well, I guess that's one way to do it," Lelouch shrugged with a sheepish grin, helping Kallen sit up. She grinned viciously at him, though she was also relieved it worked.

o~o

"The main engine just shorted out!" Haxus exclaimed in alarm and frustration. Sendak scowled and approached the screen. The camera came online and zoomed in on the two figures with the modified drone. The two of them had wrenched the doors open to let it through before bolting through themselves.

"We have some saboteurs. Find them and take them out."

#Fanfiction #AU #Code Geass #Voltron #lelouch lamperouge #kallen kozuki #suzaku kururugi #rai (lost colors)#shirley fenette #milly ashford #rivalz cardemonde #c.c.#princess allura #coran #sendak

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the-ink-bottle · 6 years ago

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Live Blogging Disney’s Hercules

Okay I’m gonna start with the fact that Hercules was actually named Heracles, and Disney says that his parents are Hera and Zeus but REALLY he was the product of Zeus’ fling with Alcmene. Zeus named the baby after Hera so that Hera wouldn’t kill the little guy out of rage at her cheater husband. But for the sake of the movie we’ll stick with:

00:01: a weird museum full of vases and statues, featuring the muses. I’d like to point out that there are actually nine, versus the featured five. But we all know that these ladies have enough personality to cover those other four. I can JAM to that gospel truth. We next see a view of Mount Olympus. The real Mount Olympus isn’t actually all that big, and really it would have been easy for the Greeks to climb up there and SEE the gods they believed lived there. But they didn’t Do That, which I think says a lot about the Greeks.

00:04 “I haven’t seen this much love in a room since Narcissus discovered himself.” A great joke, but Narcissus was actually a human who was later turned into a flower.

In this scene, Zeus gives his newborn son a gift: a winged horse named Pegasus. Pegasus may have obeyed Zeus, but he was actually the son of Medusa after her rape by Poseidon. He never really had any contact with Hercules that I know of.

00:07 The Fates and their threads of life- creepy right? Well they weren’t actually like that. Disney’s version combines the fates with the Gray Sisters, who were featured in Percy Jackson as being all-knowing and sharing a single eye and tooth between them. The Fates had the power to end life, but they didn’t look the same or have quite the same knowledge.

00:10 So this is just gonna un-do the ENTIRE plot but, suffice it to say that Hades did not give a flying pterippus about Hercules OR Heracles. Hades is pretty well known for staying in the Underworld. He likes it there! Or rather, he hates being near his brothers. That and he isn’t exactly allowed to leave very often...

Anyways, Hercules greatest feats were actually the result of his punishment by King Eurystheus....more on that later.

00:17 A true thing! Hercules was indeed raised on earth, mortal, and strangled two large snakes when he was an infant. In the myth, however, the snakes were sent by Hera. (Fun fact: Hercules was a twin, but his brother, Iphicles, had no powers.)

00:20 Hercules’ song in the movie SLAPS. Go the Distance is a banger and Michael Bolton killed it.

00:23 Zeus tells Hercules that if he becomes a hero, his godhood will be restored. Now - where is the lie? This actually isn’t too far from the truth. His punishment from Eurystheus was to complete a series of labors. At the completion of these tasks, he would be purified of his crimes and be allowed to live on Olympus. What were his crimes? Well....we’ll get there. Patience.

00:31 This movie has a lot of great songs, mythology errors aside. Philoctetes may be a rapist and a creep, but he can sing well enough.

00:35 Now is the time when we finally meet Megara! Megara was indeed the first wife of Hercules. A bit of a downer here: Hera, in one her infinite attempts to ruin the hero’s life, drove Hercules insane one spring night. In his insanity he killed his wife and children. After coming to, he was sent to Eurystheus for punishment. Luckily, Disney skipped that part of the myth. That doesn’t necessarily mean Megara gets a happy story, as we’ll see later.

00:37 Hades is wildly interpreted by several different adaptations of myth. In this movie, he seems like a very sassy, stressed-out gay. To be fair a lot of the ancient greeks were bisexual, including Hercules! But I digress.

00:45 Hercules is faced with battling a Hydra, aka a dragon with multiple heads which regrow after being cut off. This was indeed a feature of the myth, as defeating the Hydra was one of Hercules’ tasks set by Eurystheus. In the myth, he is assisted by his friend and kin, Iolaus. The movie does a good job depicting this, even minus the help. The scene is followed by another SMASH of a song, Zero to Hero. It is during this musical montage that we glimpse his other achievements: the slaying of the Nemean Lion, for example, whose hide is later seen as a cloak around Hercules (peep the Lion King reference).

00:51 Hades: “What are THOOOSE”

00:56 There’s the Lion King ref I mentioned, among several other pieces of comedic relief following that scene with Zeus.

00:59 I CAN HEAR THE BEGINNING NOTES OF “I Won’t Say I’m in Love” AND I AM REAAAADDYYYY also peep the prick of cupid’s arrow in Megara’s back.

00:01 HERE IT IS THE SONG OF THE CENTURY GET IT SUSAN EGAN

01:06 I’m gonna take this time to point out a major change from the myth. Hercules never really had a “trainer” in any story I’ve read, unless you count the musical tutor who Herc killed for being too critical. In actuality, Philoctetes was another hero and friend of Hercules who was badly wounded at Troy. There was never a satyr rapist involved (a sapyst? A ratyr?)

01:15 Hermes is the chaotic good sassy gay and Hades is the chaotic evil sassy gay

01:16 The power of animation is making Megara look gorgeous even after being crushed by a pillar

01:18 If Hades’ hair is fire does that make him flamingly gay?

01:22 A total Orpheus and Eurydice moment, Hercules was never able to get is wife back from the dead in the myth. He did go to Hades in order to dog-nap Cerberus once, though.

01:23 Hades: “MR STARK I DON’T FEEL SO GOOD”

Finalé: Hercules is a great movie for little kids getting started on mythology. I’ve always loved the humor and sound track, even if almost everything is inaccurate.

Aaaand a bonus panel: my favorite meme

#hercules #heracles #greek gods #greek mythology #disney #movie review #film #mythology

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ryanmeft · 7 years ago

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Thor: Ragnarok Impressions

I really liked Thor: Ragnarok. I'll put my cards on the table: I am probably going to like movies in this shared Marvel universe more than the average bear. It seems that the more pissed I get at Marvel as a whole (a long story), the better their movies get. 2017 dropped three of my favorites, as well as a non-MCU bonus in the form of Logan. I'm a happy nerd.

I also don't really want to go over the high points again. Every nerd and critic has already done that. So instead, I decided to share a handful of entirely personal thoughts I had about the movie during and after. Here goes.

Chris Hemsworth did not just become funny Inexplicably, I've heard a lot of chatter that Thor is finally funny in Ragnarok. I'm wondering where these people have been for the rest of the films, or for Chris Hemsworth's career. Thor has been the most comedically versatile regular character in the MCU for a while. Yes, more so than Iron Man, who rarely veers from his arrogant-playboy routine, and more so than Cap, who relies on his man-out-of-time shtick for laughs. He's even funnier than any of the Guardians. All of those characters are entertaining and play off each other well, but Hemsworth can do it all himself. He's able to simultaneously make Thor a lovable lug and poke fun at his tough guy image. It isn't that he becomes funny in Ragnarok, it's that Taika Waititi takes off the cuffs and allows him free rein.

Did they just actually move Loki's character forward? NOTE: HUGE SPOILERS IN THIS SECTION Tom Hiddleston has always been a gift to the MCU. For one thing, no two actors in the franchise play off each other as well as Hemsworth and Hiddleston. For another, he somehow makes the "Snake" character work. Most of the time, when someone continually changes sides (Miles Teller in the Divergent series, for instance), you wonder why the other characters don't just off them and get it over with. By comparison, Marvel has done an excellent job over multiple directors of maintaining Loki's character and relationship to Thor in ways that let us see why the God of Thunder keeps the God of Mischief around. In this particular movie, Loki is literally given the task of destroying Asgard to stop Hela, and seems to have mended his relationship with his brother. But...did he take the Cosmic Cube at the end? Of course he did. Not only can I see no other way he could have gotten onto the ship to escape, but it actually makes sense. Otherwise, the Infinity Stone inside would have been left adrift at the site where the world it was known to be on just exploded, for anyone to amble along and pick up. That may not be Loki's motivation, but Thanos did promise to hunt him down if he didn't bring him the Cube. And according to descriptions of the unreleased Infinity War trailer shown at Disney's D23 event, one scene pictures a kneeling Loki...handing Thanos the cube. If you think Loki's constant betrayals are getting old, there's another wrinkle: perhaps he agreed to serve Thanos again in order to spare the survivors of Asgard.

The movie definitely delivered on the title Going in, I did not expect the film would follow the comics, in which, last I read, Ragnarok really happened and Asgard as we knew it was destroyed. In fact, the movie followed that pretty closely, with the exception of Loki not being the one to initiate the apocalypse. Asgard is gone, and Thor is getting ready to re-home his people on earth, similar to the comics Thor. This seems like a pretty bold move for the movies, but really, the Thor series and character were too tethered to Asgard, in many ways. Ragnarok was obviously meant as a clear break with the dour and serious tone of the previous Thor movies, and severing the character's ties to Asgard was a necessary step. Also, I know critics aren't supposed to like final battles, but that one was pretty epic. I don't recall a giant green monster fighting Fenrir in the original myths.

Throwing the cast together really works There's not much to elaborate on here. Tessa Thompson kicks major ass and is mercifully not set up much as a love interest. Loki and Thor work as well as they always do. The Hulk and Banner fit surprisingly well, with Mark Ruffalo playing off the proceeding as himself as well as he does when he's CGi-ed up. Karl Urban seems to have had a lot of scenes cut behind those meaningful looks, but his role works fairly well. Idris Elba's Heimdall finally gets more to do than stand there looking serious, and it's about damn time. Several movies could easily be made out of this group. Even Benedict Cumberbatch's brief appearance as Doctor Strange is fun. The only letdown is no appearance by Jamie Alexander's Sif. It would have been great to see her and Valkyrie get into a drunken arm-wrestling match. I also need to mention that Thompson's inclusion pisses off racists, which is awesome.

Marvel's villains keep improving I've never been on the all-Marvel's-villains-suck bandwagon, but there's no question 2017 has seen their best ones yet. The Vulture from Spider-Man still takes the prize, but Cate Blanchett's Hela is deliciously dark, and Jeff Goldblum's deliciously devious Grandmaster is a treat. It's honestly hard for me to see how Thanos could top any of 2017's baddies.

Taika Waititi! He can do no wrong. Everybody run out and see Hunt for the Wilderpeople and What We Do in the Shadows, right now. I wouldn't whine if they had him back for the next film.

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fourteenacross · 7 years ago

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H’OKAY. SO. Last night we saw Dave Malloy as Pierre!! :D

We’d been planning this trip since they announced he was doing a series of shows--we knew we had to see him but we needed to make it work with timing and vacation days and stuff like that, so we ended up tagging this trip onto the front of my trip to Charlotte later this week, which inadvertently made it the first show after the Tonys, which we won’t talk about because I think I’ve made my saltiness on that front PRETTY CLEAR so far. With things working out the way they did, we decided that we should get a gift for Malloy to acknowledge how much this show has meant to us and that he won all the Tonys in our hearts. Initially I thought a plant was a good idea because flowers die and are also awkward to carry around. From there, my brain thought: well, we should put it in a box so he can just throw it in his bag. We should decorate the box. We should decorate the box to look like the theatre.

(At queer speed dating the other night, someone asked me which Parks and Rec character I most identify with. I said, “I feel like Ben Wyatt, but if you ask any of my friends, they’d say I’m Leslie Knope.”)

So, we decided all this on Monday night? So Tuesday was spent running around getting fabric and glue guns and putting all of this together. All of the little frames have pictures of members of the creative team. It’s PRETTY DARN CUTE, I’ve gotta say.

The entire day was a wild ride--we got the thing done just in time, then realized that my dad had taken my car keys with him so we were gonna miss the bus. Then he managed to get them to us in time for us to make the bus. Then the bus was stuck in traffic TWICE AS LONG AS USUAL. The florist was out of succulents and I had to run all over to find one. Literally run. I ran. With my legs and my lungs and stuff. It was the worst. But I managed to get to the theatre at 6:55 and use the rest room and get into my seat and chug a smoothie.

AND THEN THE SHOW STARTED!

First off, as you can see from the top picture that I wasn’t supposed to take, we were sitting in the rear mezz. We’ve only ever sat on stage before, so it was fascinating to watch the show from this angle. It made the lighting and set and choreography really come alive. I love sitting on stage--I love being at the center of the action and watching the show unfold around you--but I felt like I got a clearer picture of how the whole thing works as a cohesive unit from sitting in the mezz.

Still, the Imperial isn’t that big! Even sitting like, four rows from the back, I felt like we were right in the middle of things. And, bless that ensemble, the hardest working folks on Broadway, they were up and down the aisles even as far back as we were, dancing and singing and handing out shakers and playing instruments and who knows what else. At one point, Erica Dorfler was right in my face and she’s so pretty that I literally forgot how to shake my shaker, jesus christ. We had a great view of “Coachella Sonya” in the “Balaga”/”The Abduction” dance break, which I was into XD Also, Nick Gaswirth’s excellent dancing was only a few rows away from us.

There were a lot of tiny things I noticed from up high, too--Or and Nick Belton buddying around during “The Duel” and “Balaga”/”The Abduction,” the way Pierre reacts to things happening in the show as he sits in his little hole during the numbers he isn’t in, Anatole admiring himself in L I T E R A L L Y every mirror he walks by, though that might just be a Blaine Krauss thing XD “The Duel” in general was a really fun experience from up high--it was neat to see EVERYTHING instead of just being overwhelmed and in the middle of things. I was removed enough from the action that my brain had time to remember the first time we saw the show at ART when “The Duel” started and I was just like, “.....what the hell IS this show?”

I know I already talked about how good the lighting is, but the lighting is just so fucking good, you guys. The tiniest, most subtle little changes, the way that all the lights slowly go out during “Sonya Alone” until it’s just the spot on her, the lights coming down from the ceiling one by one in “No One Else” like snow falling, the use of the bright lights behind the doors, THE COMET, all of these wonderful, tiny little touches. It was beautiful.

In addition to Malloy, we had two other understudies! Blaine Krauss as Anatole was A M A Z I N G. Some understudies have a problem with trying to emulate the performance of the person they’re subbing for, but that was NOT THE CASE here. Blaine totally made the role his own--his Anatole was delightful and outrageous and over the top and full of himself and vain and hilarious. He definitely had a funnier spin on it than Lucas does, and almost more immature? Like, Lucas’ Anatole isn’t exactly a paragon of maturity, but he wants to THINK he’s mature. Blaine’s Anatole is just a brat and knows it and owns it. His comic timing was AMAZING and he hit the high C sharp and he was overdramatic and fun.

We saw Azudi Onyejekwe as Dolokhov, too! I’ve been wanting to see him as Anatole, but his Dolokhov was great. Much like Blaine, he didn’t try to emulate Nick, just went his own way with it. His Dolokhov was cocky, but not as mean as Nick’s (not a complaint--both are great interpretations) and more laid back and fun-loving. Dolokhov is a character without too much to do (as mentioned directly in the Prologue XD) and it would be easy for him to fade into the background, but much like Choksi, Azudi really kept him front and center in the scenes he was in.

The rest of the cast was phenomenal as usual--Grace had her everything dialed up to eleven, Amber got some of the loudest cheers of the night, Denee is a literal angel upon this earth and “No One Else” was more heartbreakingly beautiful than I’ve ever seen it, Gelsey was amazing, Paul Pinto is insane, Nick’s Andrey continues to be SO angry, and I would TAKE A BULLET for Brittain I love her so fucking much. The ensemble killed it, I do not understand how a person can run up the stairs while playing the clarinet, but there’s Cathryn Wake doing it like it’s no big thing.

And Malloy. MALLOY.

I feel so blessed to have seen him do this on Broadway. He was incredible. I mean, obviously he was going to be incredible, but his Pierre is SO different from Scott’s and Groban’s. He’s just tired and hunched and distant and awkward and it works so, so well. He pours so much of himself into this character and it’s so obvious, even from all the way in the mezzanine. His “Dust and Ashes” made me cry and feel a hundred feelings--the resounding applause and cheers he got afterwards was so heartening. It kept going on and on and on and that made me get all teary too. He was hilarious in “The Duel,” both in the actual dueling and the lead-up song. Watching him watch the other characters was like getting a whole additional show for the price of my ticket--his emotional journey makes even more sense if you factor in what he’s seeing from the people around him as the story plays out. He and Denee and Gelsey doing “I see nothing but the candle in the mirror” gave me chills and I loved the way he did “Nothing matters--or everything matters, it’s all the same.” It was a really cool take on the line. He was great during the toast part of “The Abduction,” with a funny little pause before he started that was either because he was genuinely out of breath or entirely for comedic effect. Either way, it worked XD

And, of course, the end of the show was beautiful. From his “whaaaat”s to Marya and his angry threatening of Anatole and desperate need to understand first Andrey and then Natasha...my heart. His spoken lines were so perfect and I started bawling in “The Great Comet of 1812″ and basically didn’t stop until the show was over.

God, the end of this show WRECKS ME in a totally different way than something like Hamilton wrecks me. My feelings in Hamilton are all about the story, about Eliza and AHam’s legacy and all of that. My feelings at the end of this show are all internal--it’s how this moment is making me feel and the connection I’m having with Pierre and with the ensemble and the music at this particular point in time. It’s so hard to explain, but it’s like...cleansing. That sounds ridiculous, BUT THERE YOU HAVE IT.

ANYWAY, after the show we went out to the stage door. It was about nine hundred degrees outside STILL and it took me about two minutes to turn into a gross sweat monster. We were surrounded by all these sweet teen girls who looked perfect and refreshed and it was mildly hilarious. We chatted with people as they came out, including Scott who was smiling vaguely as he walked by until we said, “We saw you at ART and you were great!” and he did a double take and ran back over to talk to us.

Malloy finally came out and got down to us around 10:30 and we talked to him and told him how much we adore this show and how great he was and gave him his dumb gift and I made him sign my Great Comet book and take a selfie. I do not remember most of this conversation, but I am pretty sure I didn’t entirely embarrass myself.

And then we left and got frappachinos because I was dying for a milkshake and technically can’t have them. And we went back to Port Authority and took the bus home and went to bed and THAT WAS THE END OF THE NIGHT. Whew.

#natasha pierre and the great comet of 1812 #stuff i've seen #show notes #theatre #dave malloy #my face

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joyofcrime-elinorhigh · 6 years ago

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Dragon Ball Super Resurrection ‘F’ Arc REVIEW:

Previously on Dragon Ball Super. Goku pounded a pussy, for FIVE EPISODES STRAIGHT!

Hello everybody, my name is JoyofCrimeArt and welcome back to my multi part review/retrospective on every single arc of the anime series Dragon Ball Super. Last time we talked about Dragon Ball Super we talked about the of the "Battle of Gods" story arc. If you haven't read that review yet you might want to before preceding, that way you can know my thoughts on that arc before we talk about this arc. So the link is here if you are interested. Dragon Ball Super: Battle of Gods Arc REVIEW: Now let's talk about this arc and the history behind it. Like Battle of Gods, this arc (titled the "Resurrection 'F'" if the title of this review didn't make that clear) is an adaptation of the film "Dragon Ball Z: Resurrection 'F'" which came out in 2015. Now if you remember last time, I mentioned that I loved the Battle of Gods movie, and thus, the arc had a lot to prove if it wanted to surpass the movie in quality. Which in the end it was not able to do, despite having some good moments here and there. However with Resurrection 'F' it's a bit of a different story. I thought that the movie was good, but nothing especially great. It had an interesting premise, some really good action scenes, and kept a lot of the fun and comedic tone that was so prevalent in "Battle of Gods." However, it also suffered from a lot of weird pacing issues, a lot of things not being very well explained, and a bit of a weak ending. I remember when I first watched the film I thought that "Yeah, this would probably be better as an arc rather than a film" (Dragon Ball Super was already out in Japan by the time I got around to see the film for the record.) There could be room for an adaptation to expand upon things that where kinda brushed aside in the film version, so I was interested to see how the arc would deliver. Did it do just that? And is this arc and upgrade or a downgrade from the movie of which it is based? Well, let's dive in and find out. Also, for the record I will be discussing mainly the dubbed version, not the subbed, just as I did with the Battle of Gods arc, and will be doing for all future Dragon Ball Super arcs. Just wanted to make sure that that was clear from the get go. So the story begins not that long after the end of the Battle of Gods arc with Vegeta being mad that's he's been overshadowed by Goku for the like nine thousandth and first time. Determined to become stronger, he goes out to train when he finds out that Bulma has actually been having lunch dates with Beerus's assistant, Whis. Whis has been wanting to see more of Earth's food after the Battle of Gods arc, and since Beerus is asleep at the moment he has nothing better to do. Bulma's been showing him all of the food that Earth has to offer, that way if Beerus ever comes back to destroy the world again, Whis will have incentive to stop him. Vegeta questions what Whis's actual role is in the god hierarchy and Whis tells him that he is the one who actually taught Beerus how to fight, and thus is actually much more powerful than him. Impressed, Vegeta begs Whis to train him, so he can become stronger than Goku is. Whis agrees, but only if Vegeta can find him a tasty food that Bulma hasn't shown him before. This leads to a hilarious scene of Vegeta trying and failing to feed Whis a meal that will please him. And I do mean hilarious. Like, I know that a lot of Dragon Ball fans skipped to the post movie arcs, but please, if you are one of those people I highly recommend that you do yourself a favor an go watch episode 16 of Dragon Ball Super. It's one of the funniest episodes I've seen so far. Christopher Sabet has been voicing Vegeta for so long that he is absolutely perfect at pulling off the comedy in these comedic Vegeta scenes, and he has some great ab libs. Also just as the "Vegeta in a choo-choo train bit" justified the Battle of God's arc's existence for me Vegeta calling Bulma "babe" does the same for this arc.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYjMn_FsIHY

Eventually Vegeta is able to win Whis over by showing him the greatest food that humanity has ever created. Instant microwave ramen...apparently. Vegeta goes off with Whis to Beerus's planet to train and we get a six month time skip. Goku, who's been to busy with his new found farming job and his new role as a grandfather to Gohan's newly born daughter Pan, finds out that Vegeta's been out training without him and asks Bulma to get Whis to train him too, much to Chi-Chi's dismay. Goku, never one to miss out on an opportunity to abandon his loved ones, is able to convince Whis to train him too by just kinda bugging him a lot. Whis begins training Goku and Vegeta by having them do simple house chores Mr. Miyagi style. Though after Beerus wakes up from his slumber Whis tells Beerus that the reason he's training Goku and Vegeta isn't just because of the free food or to get out of housework, but because he's genuinely interested in seeing there true unlocked potential. Oh, and also new outfits! Neat. All the stuff that I've just mentioned are additions that the anime added. In the movie we just start with Goku and Vegeta on Whis planet training and get told how they ended up there. I greatly prefer this version of events more. In the movie, while Beerus and Whis where interested in seeing Goku become stronger, it still felt kinda weird how they where trying to kill Goku in one movie, and in the next movie they're just hanging out on there planet. I know Goku befriends his enemies a lot but it felt a little bit to...quick I guess? Here though it flows a lot better and provides some great comedy. Also it's great seeing Bulma being proactive and trying to stop another disaster before it begins by befriending Whis. To many characters in this show are reactive instead of proactive, and it's nice seeing Bulma being smart enough to plan for this kind of thing. Overall I would call all of this stuff a good expansion of the film. Meanwhile out in deep space, we see a group of people that we haven't seen in a long time. The Frieza Force. That's right, turns out that they're still around. Which makes sense I guess, considering the fact that after our heroes defeated there leader they kinda just sort of forgot about the rest of them. We learn that the Frieza Force has been falling into disarray ever since Frieza died. Sorbert, the new leader of the Frieza force, along with his second in command Tagoma decide that they have no chose but to go to Earth and find the dragon balls in order to bring Frieza back to life and restore there empire back to it's former glory. The Frieza Force arrive on Earth to discover that the now children Pilaf Gang have already been collecting the dragon balls so they can wish for world domination. Geez, you'd think the Z fighters would frickin' collect these balls the moment they become activated, even if they don't intend to use them. Two separate groups of villains nearly collected all of them without the good guys even noticing. Sorbert makes them hand over the balls and they wish for Frieza to come back to life. But not before we the audience see what Frieza's been doing in hell for all of this time.

Oh my God, this is all of my yes. Unfortunately for them, Shenron can not rebuild Frieza's body. But only bring back the still alive pieces. So are you frickin' telling me that even after Future Trunks cut Frieza into a billion pieces it was still the energy blast that killed him? I'm going to have to call bull on that good sir! However, luckily for the villains they can still reform Frieza's body using an upgrades version of there healing chambers. They leave as quickly as they came and not long after Frieza is back!...Again.

Man, Frieza is kinda like the Ganondorf of DBZ, isn't he? Speaking of which, let's talk about Frieza for a minute. Frieza is cool. I know many people say he's over played, (which he totally is.) but that doesn't take away from the fact that, on a fundamental level, Frieza is just really frickin' cool. From his sadistic but also flowery mannerism, his threatening but also quite unassuming design, to his role in the story that from a narrative perspective makes him the ultimate antithesis to both Goku and Vegeta, Frieza is just cool. And that's not even to mention the voice performance that's masterfully crafted by Chris Ayres. Frieza, in my opinion at least, is the best Dragon Ball Z villain. He was able to come off as extremely powerful, and unlike Cell or Buu he was able to enter the series RIGHT before power of all of the characters became so unbelievably powerful that the concept of power started to be to high to hold any substantial weight. Or at least, that's my opinion. So while many people where annoyed to see a villain rehashed I wasn't super against it. I know that technically, from a story perspective, yes it's kinda dumb to bring Frieza back. They're no points, we've done all of this before. But when you see Frieza come out of that healing chamber, as the ominous music builds, it's hard for me to not feel hyped to see one of the greatest cartoon bad guys come back to settle the score. So I am kinda torn on this. My brain is saying no, but my heart is saying yes. You know what I mean?

Oh my God, it's so cool! So once Frieza is brought back, he immediately decides that he wants revenge. Though after hearing that Goku's become strong enough to take on Majin Buu, Frieza decides that it would be best to train for four months first. Frieza, being a naturally gifted fighter from birth, has never trained before. He believes that if he we're to actually apply himself he would be able become so stronger and break through his limit's just like Goku did. We also get into another film vs anime difference here. In both versions Tagoma suggests to Frieza to not focus on petty revenge and focus on rebuilding his empire. In the movie Frieza kills Tagoma for suggesting that, but in the series he just mutilates him. Frieza then says that Tagoma will be his training partner as punishment. In the movie we never really learn what Frieza's training is. Here we get to see it very briefly. (Too briefly if you ask me.) Basically Frieza spent four months beating Tagoma to near death everyday, then put him in the healing chamber so he could do it again the next day. This not only made Frieza stronger but Tagoma too. And Tagoma under this torture kinda goes a bit nuts. Learning from Frieza that the only way to true power is by embarrassing pure sadism and ruthlessness. It's interesting to see, especially since in the film Tagoma is pretty much just there to be killed by Frieza. It's an interesting change. Though I do question how beating up someone that much weaker than him helped Frieza get so strong so fast. Or how being beaten helped Tagoma. But hey, this is Dragon Ball we're talking about. Peoples power depends completely on what's convenient in the moment, especially in Super! We also see some of Goku and Vegeta's training with Whis. We get a glimpse of some energy that they seem to be locking into.

Hey look, foreshadowing! That's something that wasn't in the film version! Whis tells the two of them that if they want to become strong enough to defeat Berrus they need to overcome there flaws. Goku needs to stop being so overly confidence and Vegeta need to stop overthinking things. Wait, isn't Vegeta's whole thing that he doesn't think things through? Like when he let Cell reach his perfect form or when he let Babidi brain wash him? Both things that nearly lead to the destruction of the Earth? Yeah, I'm not the only one thinking this, right? But whatever, regardless Whis tells that they the biggest thing they need to do is learn to work together. Whis decides to throw them both in a pocket dimension so they can learn how to internalize there ki, because Whis is kinda a dick. Oh, a Whis also foreshadows the fact that he can rewind time. I'm sure that won't be at all relevant later on... Four months past and Frieza is ready to invade the Earth. However, luckily for our heroes Bulma get's a warning about this upcoming invasion by none other than...Jaco! What's that? You don't know who Jaco is? It's Jaco! Y'know, the main character of Akira Toriyama's 2013 short run manga series "Jaco the Galactic Patrolman." that, in the final chapter, was revealed to actually be set in the Dragon Ball universe. This manga was not very well know before Jaco was introduced in Super and the Resurrection 'F' movie, and hasn't seen any form of english translation as of the time of me writing this review, but don't worry, they don't bother explaining who he is or how he knows Bulma for any newcomers. And if they don't have to explain it than why should I, right? Moving on! With Jaco's warning Bulma tries to contact Whis by using a strawberry sundae, by alas it doesn't work. So Bulma has no choice but to get all the other fighters that she can. Piccolo! Gohan! Krillin...Tien...Master Roshi for some reason.... Yay? They tried to get Buu as well, but he was asleep. I'm sure that this won't become a trend or anything! Frieza lands on Earth with his army of a thousand men. And in typical Dragon Ball fashion it's up for all of the lamer heroes to stall the minions while we wait for Goku and Vegeta to show up. The battle begins and honestly, it's a lot less cool than it is in the movie. Not just because of the animation downgrade, which is inevitable, but also just because a lot less time is devoted to it in general. Also in the movie we see Jaco fighting along side the other Z fighters, and it's really cool. However, in this we just see him sneak attack like one or two guys. I don't like this, why take away some of the awesome Jaco moments? Still though, it still is pretty cool to see a six on one thousand battle with the six managing to pull in a win. That's still pretty frickin' epic. However, a plus the series does have is, as mentioned before, Tagoma, who proves to be quite the formidable and sadistic foe, being able to give even Piccolo the run around. This is actually really cool and Tagoma's English voice actor Micah Solusod. He does a good job adding a lot to an overall not super well developed character. However, Tagoma's reign of terror is cut short when Gotanks shows up (Also an addition the series makes.) and pretty much one shots him. While I do like how Gotanks is added, as Goten and Trunks really don't get to be in much of the action in Super in general, it is a bit lame that Tagoma only get's one episode to really do anything of note. Feel's like there was more that could be done with him. However in another interesting twist, a certain alien frog shows up, and if you're a long time DBZ fan you'll know what I mean. Captain Ginyu, trapped in a frog's body for all of this time, shows up and uses his body switching powers on Tagoma and steals his body. Ginyu is back in all of his flamboyant glory! And yes, while I do wish we got a bit more time with Tagoma as Tagoma, this isn't that bad of a trade off.

In a scene that was in the film briefly, but very much expanded upon in the series we see Gohan showing mercy to the Frieza soilders by not killing any of them. This mercy enrages Frieza, as it reminds him of the mercy that Goku gave him back in the Namek saga. We get this really creepy scene of Frieza just decimating Gohan, as Gohan has become a lot less powerful since Z due to him focusing less on training and more on his job and family. Frieza beats him easily and starts torturing him to the full extent that a show that is aimed at Japanese children can allow. Frieza is about to finish the job, but right as he fires the blast Piccolo get's in the way and sacrifices himself in order to save Gohan, just like he did in the Saiyan saga. Gohan is forced to lie on the ground, seeing that despite all the time that has pasted nothing has really changed. He's still forced to rely on Piccolo and Goku to protect him, and he is helpless to stop Frieza from destroying his planet, and by extension his friends and family. It's a really powerful scene in my personal opinion, as it gives Gohan a lot of character development and shows Frieza at his most ruthless. Whis finally get's Bulma's message and picks up and Goku and Vegeta find out about what's going down on Earth. However, it'll take them at least thirty minutes to get to Earth if they travel with Beerus and Whis, and Goku can't teleport to Earth because he can't lock on to anyone's power over such a long distance. That is until Gohan uses all the energy he has left to power up as much as he can, making an energy signal powerful enough for Goku to detect it and Goku and Vegeta teleport to Earth, with Beerus and Whis following shortly behind. And then Vegeta kills Ginyu. Geez, first Tagoma now Ginyu. Why does this arc keep introducing all these cool ideas only to get's rid of them after only half an episode! This isn't Adventure Time!

Well...I guess you could that that Ginyu...Croaked? (...I'll go home.) With Tagoma a frog and Ginyu dead it's time for Frieza to get out of his chair and take matters into his own hands. He powers up and in the process kills all of his men except for Sorbet by accident. Though Frieza is not bothered by this, as he believes that men that weak have no right to serve as his army. ...Y'know Frieza, maybe killing all of your men just to show how evil you are is a bad idea. Like, what if you lose and they're nobody left to revive you? Y'know, like what totally ends up happening... Goku and Vegeta argue over who get's to fight first and decide with a game of rock-paper-scissors, which Goku wins. Goku and Frieza begin to fight for a bit, and sadly like the Battle of God arc this is where the animation starts to go down in quality. Though luckily it's nothing that's to noticeable. The two go back and forth for a while until Vegeta get's board and demands to fight instead. This leads to Goku and Vegeta actually fighting each other for a bit and honestly this leads to a big flaw this fight has in both versions. There is a sever lack of tension. Goku and Vegeta are taking turns fighting, and honestly treating this more like a game than an actual threat. There's never a feeling of tension because whenever Goku is on the ropes where reminded that Vegeta is just off to the corner standing there, ready to jump in if anything goes really wrong. Coupled with Whis time reversing technique that was foreshadowed so obviously that we know that it's coming, it really results in the biggest problem that I think I have with the entire fight. Goku pulls a fast one on Frieza by revealing that he too has a final form, in the form of Super Saiyan Blue! It's like a normal Super Saiyan, but blue! Ooooooh! In all seriousness though it is a bit different. Remember that training that Goku and Vegeta did in the other dimension to focus on internalizing there energy. Well that's what Super Saiyan Blue is. It keeps all the energy inside them, making sure not to waste in unnecessarily. So no power ups that destroy mountains and no hours of screaming, it much more zen. And interesting change of paste from what we are use to. The design is cool, and I do like how it is different from some of the other forms, but in a lot of ways this form feels very unnecessarily. We JUST got Super Saiyan God in the last arc, and they made a big deal about getting it. And now it's just replaced by a new form that got only the tiniest bit of foreshadowing before hand. It honestly feels like something they threw into the movie just to make sure that people would see it, and they had to add it into Super as a result of that. But Frieza has a trump card, a new form! It's his final final form! Called Golden Frieza, a form he modeled after the Super Saiyan form, as a form of ironic mockery. Also, I guess Frieza can chose what his forms look like? Then how come Frost's forms look pretty much the same in the next arc? The forms design is...okay. I don't know normally gold and purple look really good together, but I dunno, it looks a bit gaudy to me personally. Though it's nothing awful or anything.

Oh, and Beerus and Whis show up. They eat ice cream. Yay. Frieza and Goku punch for a bit. While not awful or anything it does pale in comparison to the film version and especially the Goku vs Frieza fight in Z. I know that comparison might come off as a bit unfair but it's hard not to compare them when it's literally the same match. The original Goku vs Frieza fight is considered one of the greatest fight scenes in anime history by many, and this arc trying to recreate it in a nostalgic way was always distended to be a losing battle. Also while the Battle of Gods arc had the problem of making the Goku/Berrus fight to long, this arc has the opposite problem with the fight being to short. The fight is divided into three parts: Base Goku vs Base Frieza, Blue Goku vs Golden Frieza, and Blue Vegeta vs Golden Frieza. Each of these phases last only one episode. Three episodes is awfully short, especially considering that the original Goku Frieza fight was nineteen episodes, and that's not counting the Frieza fight with the other Z fighters before that. I'm not saying it has to be that long, that would be just plain awful, but something a bit more might of been nice. I should of at least been about as long as the Goku/Berrus fight at least. It's frickin Frieza for God's sake. Goku has Frieza on the ropes, and in typical Goku fashion offers Frieza a chance to leave and be sparred. He powers down from Blue (Which is a change from the movie.) and then get's shot through the chest by Sorbet from behind. Goku got over confident, just like Whis warns. Frieza begins to torture the barely alive Goku and Vegeta steps in, kills Sorbet, and get's Goku away so he can be healed. It's now Vegeta's turn to fight. Vegeta turns Super Saiyan Blue as well and we learn of Frieza's great weakness. The moment he unlocked his form he went to Earth, and didn't bother spending any time mastering his form. So the form suffers from Stamina issues and will not last that long. However it seems a bit weird, because they way that it implies that Vegeta and Goku have master Super Saiyan Blue for a while now, but they just learned about holding in there energy earlier that day. But they keep things so vague and explain Super Saiyan Blue so badly that it's left open enough I guess...? Vegeta and Frieza continue to fight until Frieza is left completely drained. Vegeta is about to finish Frieza off for good. But Frieza, in the Dragon Ball equivalent of throwing a board game off a table when you're about to lose, punches the ground and blows up the planet, in a pretty actually emotional sequence all things considered.

Oh, right. I forgot he could do that. However, before the planet explodes Beerus and Whis make a bubble that protects pretty much everyone there except for Vegeta from the blast. Oh boy, if only there was some kind of Chekhov's gun we could use in this situation. So yeah, Whis uses the time rewind ability, however we learn that his ability t rewind time only goes back three minutes. He tell's Goku to take the situation seriously this time and not be cocky. And so Goku does, using a Kamehameha to finish Frieza of for good. ... ... ... For good. Piccolo is brought back to life OFF SCREEN! (Yeah, that's seriously how little death matters at this point.) Gohan decides to go back to training with Piccolo that way next time something like this happens he can be prepared to protect his love ones. This is another Super addition and I honestly like what it does for Gohan's character. (To bad it'll be another sixty one episodes before we see any of this come to fruition- The arc ends with Goku explaining what happened to Vegeta, and they ponder what they could accomplish if they actually followed Whis's instructions and work together. However, neither of them seem interested in doing that and Goku laughs it off. Yay! Nothing was learned! Overall the ending in the arc is the same as the movie, except a bit more gravity was given to the planet destruction scene. Overall the ending still leaves a lot to be desired in my personal opinion. What I would have done differently to fix the ending? i would of had the Earth stay exploded, and THAT'S what leads into the next arc. That could be the reason why our heroes are trying to find the super dragon balls, and that could be why they enter the Champa's tournament. Obviously you would have to change some stuff around since two of the all of the fighters in the Champa tournament minus Goku and Monaka would be dead, but you could do it. I dunno, maybe it wouldn't work, but I think it would of made both arcs carry a lot more weight emotionally. But wait, that wasn't even my final thoughts! So is this arc better than the movie? Well, like the Battle of Gods arc it depends on what you're looking for. The movies a lot shorter and has a lot better animation and action scenes. However, I'm going to disagree with ninety nine percent of the Dragon Ball fandom here when I say that I think I like the Super arc more, which is weird cause I was not expecting to. I feel that while a lot of the flaws of the movies are still present, this arc adds enough new concepts that makes it better than the film over all. I like seeing how Goku and Vegeta got to train with Whis. I like seeing Tagoma and Ginyu. I like seeing Gohan get some character growth. And I like seeing Frieza just do his thing. It's great to watch, no matter how much of a marketing stunt it is! Is the arc perfect? No, like I said the animation is a lot worse, Jaco is given a much less badass role, and it's a good bit longer. But I think that, overall, I liked this version better. Though it'll be up to your own personal preference to decide which version is better for you to watch. I think part of the reason most Dragon Ball fans hate this arc so much is because it came out right after the movies release. We were burnt out on the story, still upset over the major flaws, and wanted to get to the new stuff. I think those factors may have influenced some peoples opinion on the arc itself. However me, seeing the arc over a year after watching the movie for the first time, I can say that I like it more. But that's just my opinion. I would love to know yours. What did you think of the Dragon Ball Super: Resurrection 'F' arc? Do you prefer the series or the movie's interpretation? Leave your thoughts down bellow, I would love to know you're opinion, even if it doesn't necessarily match mine. I would love to start a discussion! Also sorry about getting this review out so many weeks after the arc ended on TV. I try to get these Super reviews out as the arc air on Toonami, but sometimes life get's in the way. Anyway, please fav, follow, and comment down bellow if you liked the review or if you have any suggestions for something else for me to review. If it sounds interesting I might just do it. Have a great day.

(I do not own any of the images or videos in this review. All credit goes to there original owners.)

https://www.deviantart.com/joyofcrimeart/journal/Dragon-Ball-Super-Resurrection-F-Arc-REVIEW-705109337 DA Link

#Frieza #Dragon Ball Super #Review #anime #Dragon Ball

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evenstevensranked · 8 years ago

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#47: Season 1, Episode 1 - Swap.com

A true piece of Even Stevens history right here, guys! This was the very first episode to air... ever! It premiered on June 17th, 2000 (yes, 17 years ago!!!) and introduced us all to a baby-faced, comedic boy wonder Shia LaBeouf. And a bright, young actress (pre-Kim Possible) Christy Carlson Romano.

Strangely enough, our first glimpse into the Even Stevens-verse is an episode centered around a one-off character. Louis desperately wants to possess a rare trading card. Ernie Morton, the school nerd, owns the card and is willing to give it up for a price: A date with Ren.

This one opens with Louis and Twitty at school in some computer/Geography hybrid class. As their teacher begins a lecture on Afghanistan, we get the very first actual dialogue of the series, and it’s pretty good imo:

Teacher: Now, if you turn your attention to Afghanistan... Louis: [shouting at the computer with joy] YES!!! Twitty: Louis, it’s just Afghanistan. What’s the big deal?

Of course, Louis isn’t celebrating over the wonders of Afghanistan. He’s talking to someone online who’s willing to sell him what’s clearly supposed to be a knock-off of a rare and highly coveted Pokémon trading card. This is so funny in retrospect because the entire planet was playing Pokémon Go! last year. Points for maintaining relevancy! But basically, Louis really wants to own a Roaring Drycon... Which is not a Pokémon, but is definitely supposed to be a Pokémon:

Yes. The internet used to look like this.

It turns out, the seller of the card is none other than Ernie Morton. A frankly nasty, unhygienic, arrogant, nerdy creeper to say the least. Thank god he’s a throwaway character and only here for this one episode. He tells Louis that the price he’s asking for is a date with Ren.

Louis says to himself: “Why couldn’t he just ask for something easy? Like my mom’s Volvo.” - This is a small, but interesting parallel to Boy Meets World and was only brought to my attention when I read through this ranking of every BMW episode. Apparently, Cory puts on music, Topanga asks where he got it from and he says “I don’t know. It came with my mom’s Volvo.” Idk. Like I mentioned before.. there are a few (stronger) similarities between the two shows. I might even start a similarities tag, lol. But, yeah. This really stood out to me for some reason.

There’s a scene where two girls approach Twitty all flirty in the hallway and Louis makes them run for this hills after awkwardly shouting “WAAAZZZUUUP?!?” at them. (Which I’m assuming is a reference to the classic Budweiser commercial that premiered in 1999 and became a popular catchphrase.) I’ve seen so many gifs of this. I’m even guilty of using one on my about page. Louis tells Twitty that he made the deal with Ernie, explaining “Ernie just wants to hang out with a popular girl, and I happen to live with one.” Once again, reminding me that Ren is supposed to be popular! I still think it’s cool that she’s not the stereotypical, vapid popular girl you usually see though.

Ren really wants to beat this chick Adrienne Dunmore for Service Volunteer of the Month. She’s currently falling behind her and needs to work 4 more hours over the weekend. We see another one of Ren’s early placeholder BFFs, an Asian girl named Jewel. Random, but both of Ren’s placeholder best friends were minorities. Doesn’t really mean anything, lol. Just something I noticed.

Ren staring at Adrienne all green with envy after checking their volunteer hours. But, can we talk about how Ren’s entire bellybutton and stomach is showing?! What the heck, Disney?! I know it was in style I guess. But, for an 8th grader? Also, aside from it being purple... It doesn’t really seem like something Ren would wear. Probably just a first-episode hiccup.

And here’s Jewel. She’s also very peppy like Charlotte.

We see the Stevens family at home that night celebrating Ren’s birthday! There’s a pretty funny bit where Donnie gives Ren various pictures of himself, blissfully unaware of how narcissistic he is. The show makes good use of this later on. One particular picture of Donnie “on vacation” is seen on Ren’s bedside table in After Hours! I love good, subtle continuity! It helps make their world feel a little more real.

Donnie’s gift in this episode.

...and here seen in S1, E13. This is actually pretty funny. Another photo he gave her of himself playing baseball can be seen in the bottom/left, too. Haha, perfect. The only weird thing is that it looks like she has some strange Donnie shrine, lol wth.

Louis obviously forgot to get Ren a gift and tries to play it off by saying “I got her a thing. It’s a very very nice thing. But, I got it over the internet. These things don’t just pop out of the screen” with a mouth full of cake. It’s funny, but also a little sad. Steve says “Oh, Lou. Not again...” (which I hear perpetually in my mind whenever Louis messes up) before the entire family clears out of the living room -- disappointed as he rambles off his excuses. Oh, god.. I’m seeing shades of Uncle Chuck.

Louis is wracking his mind trying to come up with a way to get Ren and Ernie to hang out together alone. Once he gets an idea, there’s a bit where he knocks on her door to tell her. It’s been gif’d a bunch and is a very popular post on here. Being clever (and selfish) he tells Ren there’s a program called “Adopt A Friend,” where you hang out with a needy young person for a day as some form of community service. Okay, I’m actually dying now that I have to write this out, oh my god. LOUIS!!!!!!! He tells her that Adrienne Dunmore is considering doing the non-existent program, which piques Ren’s interest. We get a voiceover of Louis telling her about Ernie, blatantly lying about the kind of guy he is. Using words like “nice, giving, helpful, and great!” This is juxtaposed against a montage of the real Ernie doing various things that are the complete opposite. He’s basically the worst kind of human.

Cut to the mall now! Ren meets Ernie and wow he didn’t even try to look good.

I can tell ya one thing -- If this was The Bachelorette, Ernie Morton would not be receiving the First Impression Rose.

For whatever reason, Ren treats him like a special needs child or something? Talking to him in simplified English, slowly and loud as if he’s deaf or has trouble understanding. Louis said he was NEEDY! Not impaired in some way! (Well, maybe socially impaired...) This bit is kinda funny but it’s also kinda like... Wut. Anyway, Ernie takes Louis aside and gushes about how he can’t believe he pulled off this date. He does this really creepy/annoying thing where he sticks his tongue out constantly and I hate it. Ew.

But, yes. Ernie is under the impression it’s an actual date. He even says he’ll only give Louis the trading card after he gets his “goodbye kiss.” Problem, indeed.

Louis spends the rest of the mall sequence sneakily running around like a freaking stalker... hiding in plants and behind newspapers -- to make sure Ernie doesn’t try anything, and that no one from school sees Ren and Ernie together.

The worry in his eyes and lack of discreetness is making me laugh harder than anything else.

Ren spends 4 hours with Ernie and actually ends up having an okay time. She genuinely thanks him for “a wonderful afternoon” after taking some photobooth pictures together -- and that’s apparently good enough for Ernie. He gives Louis the card!!! Louis is stoked, but then the remorse starts to seep in. (I love remorseful Louis, though. It helps gives him more dimension.) He notices Ren window shopping and staring at a pearl necklace ~longingly~ before they head home.

Ren is super excited to turn in her hours at school (going above and beyond, writing an entire paper on her experience) only to discover there is no “Adopt A Friend” program. Yeah. I’d be pissed, too. Not only that, she finds out that Ernie has been telling the entire school that they’re dating. She lashes out at him in front of everyone saying she wouldn’t date him if he were the last guy on earth and storms off. A little harsh, but is it really? Ernie was way out of line spreading fake intimate stories and lies.

Ernie left in Ren’s dust, being made fun of.

This show has a lot of heart. You actually feel for Ernie here. But you also feel for Ren because she was played by Louis. But, you ALSO feel upset for Louis because he knows he f’d up. The conflicting emotions. That night, Ren is fuming after she figures everything out. Louis hides from her by hooking himself onto the back of his door. This is also a pretty popular/memorable scene. We get a micro-mini mirror talk here, as well! I love the Season 1 mirror talks honestly!!!

“Man. Tell 20 or 30 lies, and right away you’re a bad guy.”

Ren discovers where he’s hiding and we get a line that’s not exactly great, but was used on a lot of Disney Channel commercials back in the day. (“What are you doing back there?”/ “...Just hanging out.”) But a line I do like is when Ren asks “HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO SHOW MY FACE IN SCHOOL AGAIN, HUH?!” and Louis dryly responds “May I suggest plastic surgery?”

After talking through the situation (the cover image of this post) we find out that Louis ended up trading in the Roaring Drycon card for money to get Ren the necklace she was looking at for her birthday. Awww. Ren loves it but hates the idea that he got the money from his scheme. She comes to terms with her own faults though when Louis makes her realize she only hung out with Ernie for selfish reasons. Can we also talk about Ren’s Y2K rubber band, pigtail hairstyle in this scene?! I 100% wore my hair exactly like this in elementary school -- with blue bands and everything, because I saw Ren Stevens wear her hair like that. Miranda Sanchez rocked this look too. Why was this style ever a thing? lol. Who came up with all of these crazy Early 2000s looks?!

In the end, she turns around and gives Ernie the necklace. Apologizing & saying “This belongs to you.” Really??? WHAT A WASTE. At least keep the free necklace, Ren! Ernie and Ren makeup and he asks for a friend-to-friend hug. It’s kinda nice for a split second, but then we see his friends pop up and snap a photo of them ~embracing.~

AGAIN WITH THE TONGUE THING! What a creeper. x

This was a bit of a slow episode in retrospect. It’s super clear in my memory because Disney usually beats the first few episodes of a series into the ground. It’s a pretty safe and predictable plotline. Not a horrible episode, but definitely nothing too unbelievably special either. Not the greatest choice for a first episode, imo. Ren and Louis don’t really get to shine 100% and really flaunt that bickering sibling dynamic that the show is based on. It basically switches from Ren and Ernie sharing the screen, to Louis and Ernie sharing the screen. I mean, that sibling element is definitely there. But, you don’t really “get” that Louis and Ren are opposites always at odds. Louis just seems like a little brother who means well but messed things up for his sister, here. You also don’t really get to know anything about Louis as a character, his interest in comedy, or any of that.

There aren’t a lot of laughs, either. But to be fair, it’s the first episode!!! Much like All About Yvette, the show obviously hasn’t really hit that signature Even Stevens stride! So, taking that into consideration.. It’s pretty solid and entertaining enough. I was going to rank it higher for the mere fact that it was the first episode to air and it isn’t totally bad, lol. But, I think I’m okay placing it here. Something else that’s a little “off” is that it’s missing that signature swing-jazz style music throughout the episode that’s so prevalent in others down the line. It uses mostly generic, quirky sitcom music. Another sign that it hasn’t found its place as a show just yet.

This episode actually recently aired on Disney for their “Firsts on the First” marathon! They aired the first episodes of some of their most popular shows over the years to celebrate the New Year. Did anyone catch it? I did! I was actually home sick that night and it made my day so much better to see baby Shia’s face back on my television, honestly.

Thanks for reading! How do you feel about this being the first episode ever? Chime in below as always.

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