#i think even without the darkness he was gonna snap at one point

[emzmuu]

“Or Are You On My Side?”

Betrayal, Choices, & Blame

— an analysis | theory

under the cut!

From a young age, Kazutora has been conditioned to think in black and white. Having to choose which parents to side with, he wasn’t allowed to have both, neither, nor to find the grey area within. He was given no other choices than what was picked for him, an illusion of choice. The fight between his mother and father involved him, a bystander to their conflict, to become a victim to their neglectfulness. He felt hurt and betrayed by how they treated him or rather, their lack of treatment towards him. Kazutora even describes his home as cold and never a warm environment. This mindset grows up with him— always popping up in his thoughts when interacting with others.

He asks the questions, who will betray me next? Who can hurt me next?

This is the start of a code he creates for himself, a mantra repeated through his thoughts as he develops, but never reversed as he doesn't reflect within himself.

As a victim between the fights and abuse, he carries that mentality with him growing up; as a defensive approach to others. With Kazutora, the thought of betrayal festered. Of others having potential to hurt him. He was suffering with these thoughts, never letting others in. With this fear buried in his mind, he still attempted to reach out for friends with hope that things would be better with them compared to his parents. And they were, for a time.

For Kazutora’s birthday, his friends take him to an arcade to have fun, only to make him pay for it instead. It’s mentioned that this happens often when his friend Junpeke apologizes for always asking him to pay. Kazutora’s mood turns slightly depressed when reminded of that fact just after saying how much he likes being with them, and how they help him forget his anxiety. On the inside, he knows the truth but won’t admit that he’s being used until pushed by someone else.

That's where Baji comes in, who he meets for the first time. He points out the fault within the group, that they don’t see Kazutora as a friend but as a money tree instead. That they only saw him as something— someone— to be used when it helped them out. They ran away leaving Kazutora alone to fend for himself. Again, he was the one being hurt by those around him.

After fighting with Baji on his own, in the end he admits that he has always seen himself as a money tree as well— disappointed that he’s been betrayed by them and left behind, even though he was aware it was bound to happen— he wanted to believe, but his hopes were betrayed.

“Having friends isn’t about who takes advantage. From now and onwards, you and I are... Friends.” - Baji  

After finding out it was Kazutora’s birthday, Baji goes ahead to make up for the sorry excuse of friends and celebration he had. He declares himself as Kazutora’s friend, goes to burn a car together, encourages Kazutora to beat up Junpeke to feel better, gives him a piercing for the earring, and later introduces Kazutora to the rest of his friends; the future founding members of Toman. 

During all this, the side story shows how Baji pulled Kazutora along and made choices for him so he wouldn’t have to, and helped encourage Kazutora to act how he wanted, even if they were bad choices. To be free from the confines he made himself and to become more confident with what he wants to do. 

One day on a ride, Kazutora gets lost in his memories— of his father telling him to be thankful to whoever made him live without inconvenience. The father refers to himself here but to Kazutora, the one he is most thankful towards and respects is Baji. While the one that reminds him of his father is Mikey with his arrogance, inconsiderate of others feelings, and how it feels like he looks down on others. To be gazed down on like an ant. 

He runs into his father again who traumatizes him and is rescued by Mikey, who declares himself as Kazutora’s friend. In this instance, there’s a drastic comparison in how others choose to be Kazutora’s friend.

Junpeke only said it himself when it was convenient for him, but Mikey said it when it would inconvenience him and get him in trouble.

Still, after the events, Kazutora goes to cut himself off from them; a way to ensure he will never be hurt or to involve them with his own troubles.

He goes to distance himself from them as he learns that friends can betray him too, not just his own parents. Kazutora thinks it's best to deal with it all on his own and to not inconvenience/burden others. He keeps them at a distance, to not let them in. That way he can never be hurt.

"People will always betray anyone. Be it father, mother, or friends. Every single one of them are idiots." - Kazutora

From that point on, Kazutora's thoughts changed from,"The only one who will never betray me are my friends." To, "People can betray anyone." His fear has been confirmed, and that mantra begins to haunt him.

Kazutora reflects on this, he considered his friend Junpeke a betrayer, but never considered how his actions at retaliation for the first time built up to Junpeke coming back for his own revenge. Kazutora considers this as revenge for himself, yet Junpeke also sees it as revenge for Kazutora beating him up in the past. There is no grey area considered that both are in the wrong. His world is still in black and white.

What's interesting to note is also how Kazutora always looked on from a perspective that others would betray him. That he was exempt from that. He's an outsider to his own views, there's a disconnect. It was always how others would harm him and not that he could harm others, him retaliating was his own form of 'justice'. After all, he was always the victim since a young age— the decisions he makes whether he sees it as good or bad still ends up hurting him, so he remains a victim in his mindset.

He can't handle the consequences of his own actions and doesn't want to perceive himself as being able to hurt or betray friends, like how others have done unto him. Mikey eases him of this worry.

This scene itself caused a shift within Kazutora’s mind. Mikey had no idea that the power of his words took a hold within Kazutora. The words that saved him and cursed their relationship. From Mikey's perspective, it was him saying he accepted Kazutora for who he was and that they'll face his troubles together. To not keep his worries to himself and depend on one another, because they're friends. 

Everything that is Kazutora's is also Mikey's.

To Kazutora with a victim complex, Mikey was his saving grace. Kazutora placed Mikey as his as well— in a sense that all his troubles and faults would be Mikey's. Kazutora was free from burdens to act as he wanted, as Mikey would take responsibility for him and his actions.

This is what led him to blame Mikey in a very convoluted sense.

In the side stories and flashbacks, Kazutora is fine hurting and threatening others that he considers rivals and enemies— he shows no remorse. But in the panels above, he cannot accept that reality anymore, considering that he killed someone close to his friend— indirectly hurting Mikey.

He doesn't want to accept that he betrayed Mikey. He didn't want to think himself capable of hurting those close to him. 

Then he remembers.

He only remembers how Mikey said all of Kazutora's problems, thoughts, himself— would be his. Through those words, Kazutora places Mikey as his Jungian shadow. He separates that entity and all of his problems from himself onto one singular person.

For Kazutora, it was all for Mikey in the first place. It was all because of Mikey. So he should shoulder the blame for everything. Kazutora doesn't want to recognize himself as a bad person like his parents or those who hurt him.

“It’s your fault I got sent to juvie.” - Kazutora

At the Valhalla initiation, the words chosen here by Kazutora as he explains the process to Takemichi is also interesting. As this is how Kazutora viewed Mikey before— when he put him on a pedestal, only to end up hurting himself and Mikey. Idolization does more harm than good. It shows that this might be how he still perceives him as well, he wants to kill off his beliefs and Mikey, but he’s also scared of Mikey and the power he holds over him still.

“Chifuyu... What have I told you over and over? Don’t trust anybody but your friends.” - Baji

Back when Draken tells Kazutora that they're still friends, Kazutora responds with "that's what I hate about you." Baji probably told him to trust no one but his friends as well. At this point Kazutora still trusts in the fact that Baji won't 'betray' him— so when Draken declares himself as his friend no matter the events of the past, Kazutora doesn't want to accept that fact. He wants to see in black and white, to have clear cut definitions that are easy to place as what can hurt him and what can't hurt him. 

Draken is from a group that hurt him, he can't imagine himself going back to that when events could repeat again. At this moment, the fact that there's a gray area in-between the black and white does not exist to him. He doesn't want to blend the two together when it still has the possibility to harm him, so Kazutora would rather throw it away than to trust again.

This is how Kazutora tries to translate his worldview to the others, albeit childishly. It's how he can see redemption for himself while everyone views him as a villain for killing Shinichiro. Mikey, his enemy, is a problem that he made himself. If he can get rid of that problem, a shadow that he made— then he can become his own hero, and all his problems will disappear.

With Valhalla, a gang who accepted his ideals and encouraged it— Kazutora was flying high on his emotions, feeling that it was the right thing to do, that he could be a hero and gain positive recognition from it. No one could harm him ever again, he would be too high up for others to even touch. Not even his old friends.

Baji did understand Kazutora to an extent but he didn't understand how to help him. Instead he accepted Kazutora's self-destructiveness and encouraged him, thinking that as long as Kazutora felt someone was on his side, he would be fine. But as incidents unfolded, Kazutora was too far gone into himself and needed a push to bring his mind back into clarity. 

Baji didn't want Mikey blaming Kazutora, or Kazutora ending up blaming himself for his death, so he took it upon himself and decided it would be his own fault for dying. 

After Baji dies, Kazutora realizes that he was his own enemy and that Baji never did leave him, nor did Toman. He only betrayed himself in the end, ruining and pushing away the good things he did have. Rejecting others who tried to stop or even reconnect with him.

In the end he faces the truth, and realizes that he was also part of the problem— that it's not just others that can betray him, but also himself.

"I'm staying Baji. You guys go on… This is my fault. I want to take responsibility. I won't ask you to forgive me. I'll live my whole life with Shinichiro-kun… and Baji's deaths… on my shoulders." - Kazutora

Later, after the events of Bloody Halloween, Draken goes with Takemichi to visit Kazutora in juvie and to pass on a message from Mikey.

They knew that these words were important for Kazutora to hear— for his sense of self and his feelings of belonging. He's been struggling all his life with a mindset made to protect himself. That there was no one else on his side, or that there was nothing he could ever truly be a part of— without worrying how things could end up hurting him.

"Why…?" 

He's been forgiven by Mikey and in essence of that, Toman. Kazutora though, doesn't seem to quite forgive himself yet and Draken understands some part of that. He is aware that he caused problems too and can no longer blame others for his own faults. He has no one else to share it with. 

Black and white, choosing a hero and a villain. He understands he is not completely good and that no one is completely evil, but gray.

Mikey is no longer a shadow for Kazutora to push his faults onto as he has come to accept and take responsibility for the trouble he has caused. He is back to holding onto his own burdens/shadow— for himself to handle. He just has to learn how to carry it right this time.

____________

He is used to being betrayed but he doesn't think he's capable of betraying others. When he kills Shinichiro he realizes that he betrayed Mikey, it went against all reasoning that he built up, that he could do no wrong. He broke one of the stable points in his mind and the cause of him breaking his own code, was the cause of his own betrayal —> Mikey 

TLDR::: 

In the side stories it shows that he is used to being used and having shitty friends but doesn't want to confront it bc they're all he has. 

And then in the Valhalla fight when Kisaki calls Hanma and they mention Baji betrayed them Kazutora loses it and goes to stab Baji because that was the person he least expected to betray him. Baji saved him when he was younger and made his life better and to know the person he depends and relies on broke the code? His last stable pillar? Goodbye to kazutoras mental health.

[thebestsetter]

Thinking about Megumi Fushiguro only showing his vulnerable side around you.

And it's not like he doesn't trust his friends. It just happens that he doesn't feel safe showing that side of him near them. He thinks that it makes him seem weak. And he definitely doesn't want to look weak.

He didn't even use to show his sensitive side around you at first. He never initiated cuddles, kisses or even hugs. Maybe, if you were lucky, he'd wake up feeling brave and would hold your hand. Once in a blue moon.

But bear with him! It's his first relationship, so he has zero clue about what to do in this whole dating thing. He needed a patient partner, and, luckily, you were exactly that: never forced him to do anything he didn't want to do, never initiated anything without his consent first and never complained about his lack of experience. You were perfect for him.

One day, he was on his way to Jujutsu High after a difficult mission. His whole body was aching from head to toe, his head was hurting and he had some really bad cuts that were gonna scar for sure. The fight with a special curse had taken a toll on his body, even if he wasn't alone during it. And, honestly, even though he was literally limping, he couldn't think about anything else other than you.

His favorite part of the mission was the aftermath, not only because it meant that the problem he was choosen to solve was over, but because when he came to the dorms he knew you would be there, waiting for him with your arms between your thighs and a gentle smile. The thought of you always made him smile like a lovesick fool. Perhaps he was, indeed, a good old fashioned lover boy. Maybe he had, in fact, become one of the hopeless romantics he used to despise, because, on his way back to Jujutsu High, despite feeling like he was literally being eaten from the inside out because of how much pain he was enduring, he still found the strenght to squat and pick a pretty flower he saw on a bush.

He handled it with so much care, his eyes literally sparkling with love when he looked at it. It was so beautiful. It reminded him of you. He imagined your reaction when he gave you the flower. Would you smile and smell it, looking for a vase to put it on your desk so everyone could see? Or would you laugh at him in an affectionate way and hug it close to you, smiling at how smitten he was for you? And you would be right (as you always were), because he was, indeed, smitten. He would burn down the entire world if you asked him to. He would do anything just to make sure that you were always smiling. He would rather be skinned alive than make you cry. You were his light, the one who guided him through darkness. He couldn't even remember how his life was before he met you, and he honestly didn't want to remember. You made everything so easier, his life had so much color with you in it and the sky seemed brighter. It looked like the birds were singing a soft melody made exclusively for you both, and everything was sunshine and rainbows. Life had never seemed so bright.

"Megumi? Did you even hear what we just asked you?"

"We're losing him. I bet he's thinking about his girlfriend again."

"Ugh, he's such a loser when it comes to her. It's so sweet it makes me sick."

"What happened to bros before hoes, Fushiguro?"

"I don't know what you idiots are on about" Megumi sighed after snapping out of his trace "And I was not thinking about my girlfriend." It's not like he's embarassed of you, but he didn't feel like being mocked by Nobara and Itadori just because he thinks about you once in a while. Maybe not only once in a while. Maybe he did think about you a lot. More than he'd ever admit.

"Suuuree. And that flower is for who? I bet it's not for me or Nobara." Itadori pointed to the plant on his hands

"Shut up." Fushiguro blushed, placing the pink flower (very carefully, may I add) on his pocket. Yuji and Nobara smirked at eachother, enjoying the abashed state their friend was at.

"As we were saying, we wanted to know if you're going with us to Shoko's. She probably has something to help us with our cuts. And some of these are nasty! I really hope they don't scar, because there's a really big one on my face. That will make my modeling job harder, I'm sure. But my pretty face will make up for it"

"I think the scar will be the least of your problems..." Itadori murmured

"What did you just say?"

"Nothing!" He sweatdropped and quickly changed the topic "Anyway, are you coming with us, Fushiguro?"

The black haired boy sighed.

"I don't think so. My cuts are not that bad. I just need a little rest. If they hurt, I'll go seek help."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, you guys can go without me"

"Okay then. Bye Fushiguro!"

"I still want to know what you said earlier."

"I said nothing, what do you mean?"

Hearing his friends playful chatter disappear in the distance, Megumi's thoughts drifted to you again. He was honestly so tired that he could only think about cuddling with you or laying on your lap.

He must have been really entretained by his thoughts, cause he didn't even notice he had gotten to your dorm before he literally knocked on the door.

"I'm coming!" He heard your sweet voice saying.

"Megumi! You're finally back! I missed you!"

No feeling could ever surpass the feeling of you holding him, your arms wrapped around his torso in a strong hug that made him weak. He hugged you back as quickly as possible and nuzzled his head on the crook of your neck, closing his eyes and ihnaling your scent that drove him half-insane. It was like a drug. You were like his drug.

"I missed you too" reaching for his pocket, he grabbed the flower and gave it to you, as if he was trying to show you that, even during his missions, he still thought about you constantly. "Here"

"No way. Gumi, you shouldn't have..." you said, taking the flower from his hands and sniffing it, a content smile on your face.

"But I wanted to." He returned your smile, grabbing the flower from your hands and putting it behind your ear, removing a strand of stray hair from your face in the process.

"Even though I'm absolutely loving this moment" you said, cupping his face "You stink. Please go take a shower."

Crap! He had forgotten to shower! Now you were going to think he was stinky! Ugh, how could he be so irresponsable?

He quickly grabbed a towel and some spare clothes he had in your dorm (he went there a lot. It was practically his second home or something like that. Actually, his home is wherever you are. So, it happened that your dorm felt like home, too) and took the fastest shower he had ever taken in his life. He just wanted to go back to your arms in less time as possible. He wanted to merge with you, wanted you to hold him so close that you became one.

"I'm finished" he said, going to your room. He had to put some bandage in his larger bruises, so he was still shirtless. That being said, you could literally see how big they were.

"Oh dear God! Megumi, did you go to Shoko's? These injuries look bad!"

"They're not as bad as they look" he said, laying beside you and staring at your eyes. He didn't know what came over him, but the next words he said made even him surprised "But I bet they'd get better if you cuddled with me"

It was the first time he was initiating something. You'd be a fool to let the opportunity go.

"Well, if you say so" you smirked, looking a him with a glint of playfullness. "I really hope I can help you with that. Not sure if I'm capable tho. Don't know if my cuddles are good enough"

"Don't act ridiculous, of course they are"

"Let's start with your treatment, then." You laughed. And oh, how he loved the sound of your laugh. He loved it even more because he was the cause of it.

Carefully, you slipped your arms around him, hugging him closer to you. Your legs linked together, and he buried his face on your boobs (he didn't even have any indecent thoughts behind that action. It just felt comfortable). And, just when he thought it couldn't get better, your hands found their way to his hair. You gently unraveled all the knots, one by one, while massaging his scalp. He let out a peaceful sigh and began moving his hands up and down your back, as if massaging you, and drawing random things in your exposed skin with his fingers, like little hearts or silly smiling faces. Everything was perfect at that moment. He felt safe with you, something he didn't feel with most people. He felt completely at ease. Nothing and no one could ever ruin that moment for him.

*Click*

Until something did. Or even better: some people did.

"KUGISAKI! I TOLD YOU TO TURN THE VOLUME OF THE CAMERA DOWN"

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT I DON'T KNOW HOW YOUR STONE AGE PHONE WORKS. MY GRANDPA HAS A BETTER PHONE THAN YOURS"

"What. Are you guys. Doing here." It came out more like a comand than a question. Megumi felt frustrated that they had interrupted your alone time, and, honestly, even though he loved his friends, he just wanted them to go away. When they barged him uninvited, you had stopped playing with his hair, and he just wanted to feel your hands on his head again.

"Well, Gojo-Sensei asked us to come check if you really didn't need Shoko's treatment. But it looks like you have everything under control. We'll be going now. Just pretend we were never here..." Nobara said, trying to run away as quickly as possible before Megumi got even angrier.

"Hey! Isn't that the flower he grabbed on our way back? I knew it was for her! Look how cute, she even put it on her desk!" Itadori clearly didn't get what Nobara was trying to do.

"You idiot! We need to go fast, or else he'll get mad! Let's show the photo to Gojo-Sensei! I bet he'll find it funny. We can also use it as future blackmail, but we need to go before he gets us." The brunette girl whispered, but it was loud enough for the whole building to hear

"I can hear you, you know?"

"You're right! Let's go!" Megumi was promptly ignored.

In a normal occasion, Fushiguro would probably go after them, trying to get them to delete the picture. But he was just so tired that he didn't even have the strenght to.

"Ugh, I hate them"

"No you don't" You smiled, booping his nose and resuming your hands' work on his hair "you just need sleep. You're clearly tired, and the mission made you hurt. You deserve to rest. I'll be here when you wake up"

"Thank you." Should he say it? Oh, screw it. You needed to know. "I love you"

"I love you too, Gumi"

Honestly, he couldn't be happier right now. And so, with the feeling of your skin close to his and your hands on his hair, Megumi Fushiguro drifted off to a peaceful slumber, with the sweetest dreams he ever had. Of course they were sweet. They were only about you, afterall.

You were his everything. He loved you. And you loved him back. That was something he would forever be proud of.

~ A/N: I need sleep.

Masterlist

[luvyeni]

THEY GO TOO FAR 𖹭 엔하이픈 ( reaction ) !

genre yandere 𖹭 warning dark fic, mentions of hitting , blood , starvation , psychological torture — parings OT7! enhypen x fem reader | back to library .

request: what about yandere!enha when they've gone too far ? like punished you/messed with you enough to the point the person is non-verbal/fainted/really mad at them etc.

— what happens enhypen goes too far with a punishment?

「 authors note 𖹭 」

﹙ 𐙚 : heeseung﹚ .ᐟ

he doesn't think he went too far , in fact he got you exactly where he wanted — all to himself , that's why he did this , this why he isolated you from your friends, your family; anyone who loved you — cause only he could love you, you were his. all you did now was follow him around the house , not wanting to leave his side, you even sat on the toilet while he showered. he couldn't even leave the house without you screaming for him to stay , and that made him smile wickedly , he went too far and he loved it. "pl-please don't leave me." you sobbed , grabbing his arms , he wasn't even going anywhere, he just wanted to see what you were gonna do , smiling , he closed the door , pulling your shaking body into his arms as you begged him not to leave.

"see how easily i can leave , remember that."

﹙ 𐙚 : jay﹚ .ᐟ

when you did something he didn't like, he withheld everything from you; shower , food water for as long as he saw fit , he even ordered the maids and everyone else to ignore you. this went on as long as he saw fit , mostly a week , but he wanted to try and prolong it to prove a point to you. — until one day he heard a thud and scream of a maid , you had fainted. "shit." he pulled the tie of his suit. "don't just stand there pick her up take her to the room , call the doctor." he sighed. "how long did she go without eating?" He asked ,everyone was silent. "how long!" he shouted. "about a week and a half." he cursed , he went too far.

"stupid girl i told you to listen to me , call the fucking doctor."

﹙ 𐙚 : jake﹚ .ᐟ

jake knew he'd gone too far, you didn't care anymore. you didn't cry when he cut himself anymore , you didn't stay up for days making sure he didn't hurt himself , you were desensitized to his actions and he didn't know what to do , you were gonna leave him for sure now , he no longer had control. "I'll really kill myself this time , I promise." you stood there watching him bleed from his arms , every emotion flowing through your brain — you snapped , picking up the knife. "fine." he watched you put the blade to your arm , slicing it. "y-yn." you screamed as he began to cry. "shut up , shut up." you shouted at him. "you wanna die? you can't live without me? let's die then." you said , he was watching you go crazy.

he didn't know what to do , he'd gone way too far.

﹙ 𐙚 : sunghoon﹚ .ᐟ

sunghoon was short tempered at times , and you both knew it was only a matter of time before he went too far with his punishments , and he did. "su-sunghoon please." you could see he face turning red. "i'm sorry." he didn't hear you , all he saw was you hitting him and running towards the door , it was locked and he had the key , but he was pissed. "sunghoon please im sorry." all he wanted to do was push you to the floor , but he pushed too hard , you fell to the ground not before hitting your head on the table , knocking you out cold. "shit." he ran his fingers through his hair , checking your pulse— you were still breathing. he picked your body up off the floor taking you back to his room.

he actually felt bad this time

﹙ 𐙚 : sunoo﹚ .ᐟ

it happened too fast , you were leaving out the door, you were gonna leave him all alone , you were falling for his manipulation tactics anymore , you didn't pack anything ready to leave , he blacked out , like everything was in flashes; one minute your hand was on the door knob , another flash and the lamp was in his hand and he was behind you , then another flash and you were on the floor , he'd hit you. "oh no." he dropped the lamp , tears welling in his eyes , you were breathing but you were out cold . "im so sorry." he sobbed , holding you in his arms. "yo-you were gonna leave me , i couldn't let you go." he cried. "I'm so sorry." he moved you to the bed.

"i-im sorry i went too far."

﹙ 𐙚 : jungwon﹚ .ᐟ

so maybe he left you in the isolated room too long; normally it was only a week, he knew you could take it— so then what about 2 weeks? 2 and a half weeks? 3 weeks? no you couldn't take it , and jungwon soon found that once he stopped hearing you scream , when he went to give you food , you barely ate it , then you stopped eating all together. he started to fear you were dead , he didn't want that , so he opened the door , where you were balled up in a corner , hair messy , you whimpered from the light shining into the room. "hey come on." he said, you didn't move , he tried to come near you , but you tried to bury yourself into your knees , muttering im sorry over and over again , until he picked you up from the floor taking you to his room.

when you crawled into a ball silently sobbing to yourself , he realized he went too far.

﹙ 𐙚 : ni-ki﹚ .ᐟ

ni-ki doesn't think he went too far , he didn't even twist your arm that hard , why are you crying like a baby? "it's not broken , get up." you don't get up , so he grabs you by that arm which makes you scream in pain , he drops you on the couch. "shit." he realizes it might actually be broken. "i told you not to leave again and you did , this is your fault." he said , how the hell was he gonna explain this to a doctor? he won't , cause he's not taking you to the doctor, well not at first. "go take a pain killer and stop screaming before someone hears you." he only takes you to a doctor because he's sick and tired of hearing you scream.

"fine i'll take you , just shut up."

[strangererotica]

EXPLICIT CONTENT | MINORS DNI

Mean!Dom!Joel Miller x Reader | Joel tames Reader’s bratty, bitchy attitude with a good hard FUCK | make-up sex but meaner 😈 | rough, rough sex | includes fingering, vaginal sex, Joel holds Reader’s throat (no choking) implied age gap, some butt stuff, use of ‘little girl,’ and ‘bitch,’ as demeaning terms, oral sex, spanking, degrading language used by both Joel & Reader

Joel’s eyes pierce through you, his voice simmering with anger. “If you run that little brat mouth of yours one more time, I swear to god-.”

“-What??” you taunt him. “What’re you gonna do, old man??” He doesn’t respond immediately, so you aggressively shove at his chest with both hands. “Tough guy??” you sneer. Joel clenches his fists in restraint. Your smile is intentionally cruel in an effort to provoke him. “You gonna hurt me, you fucking asshole??”

For a moment, a softness passes over his eyes; it never occurred to Joel that you’d imagine him capable of being violent toward you. He feels…heartbroken by your lack of trust in him, but refuses to let it show.

“Is that what you want?” Joel asks instead, forcing a coldness into his tone. “You want me to hurt you?” When you try to shove at his chest again, Joel is prepared for it this time. His big hands clamp around your wrists, his lips pressed into a hard line as he holds back your assault. You both grunt as he presses your hands back against your own chest, pinning them to you.

“You’re not doin’ shit to me, little girl,” Joel growls. “No matter how big you want to try ‘n make yourself-.” He removes one of his hands, proving that he can keep you restrained using only one. “-I’m still in charge…”

You glare at him, jutting your head forward so your spit lands directly on his mouth. Joel jerks at the sudden contact of your saliva hitting him, before scoffing and running his tongue over his lip to taste it. “That supposed to piss me off-?” Joel tugs one of your hands downward and rubs his erection against it. “-Or turn me on?” he asks. “Because to be fuckin’ honest-.” Joel grinds himself against the palm of your hand. “-It’s doin’ a bit of both…”

Your bitchy defenses are crumbling further by the second. At this point, you can’t even remember what prompted the fight you started with Joel. It began this morning, gradually building in intensity till it reached a boiling point five minutes ago. “…Joel,” you utter, your voice suddenly soft, and he sure as hell notices.

“Oh, now I’m Joel again?” he asks. “What happened to all those colorful names you were calling me, huh?” He smirks condescendingly, but his cock throbs against your hand. “Am I not an old man anymore? A fuckin’ asshole? Or-.” His eyebrow lifts, as if a sudden clarity has come over him. “Maybe what you meant to say-.” Joel reaches behind you and grips a handful of your ass, squeezing so hard you wince. “-Is that you want your asshole fucked?” His eyes are so dark, it’s almost frightening. “Does that sound about right?” Joel releases your ass, followed by a spanking so hard, tears form in your eyes.

You’ve gone uncharacteristically quiet after being humbled by Joel’s strength. “Now you’ve got nothin’ to say?” he snaps. Joel cups your hand over his erection and grinds against it. “About damn time you stopped fuckin’ disrespecting me,” he growls. “I can think of better uses for your dirty mouth, anyway.”

Joel’s hands go to your shoulders, pushing you down to your knees. Without a second thought, you reach for his belt, and he smacks your hand away, shaking his head at you. “Jesus,” he mutters. “This is how I know you were bein’ a bitch on purpose.” He unbuckles his belt and pulls it through the loops of his jeans, tossing it aside. “You wanna make it up to me bad, don’t you little girl?” He unzips his jeans and pulls his cock out, watching the shadow it casts over your hungry expression. Joel scoffs as if disgusted by your eagerness, but really, he’s getting off on it. “Quit embarrassing yourself and just start suckin’ it already,” he mutters down at you.

Joel’s cock points toward your lips, a dot of precum blossoming on its fat, ruddy tip. You swipe your tongue across it, collecting the pearly liquid. He takes his cock by the base and smacks it heavy against your cheek. “I said suck it,” he scolds. “Not give it a fuckin’ kiss.” Joel grabs you by the hair and pulls your lips over his cock, thrusting back and forth inside your mouth. “Have to do everything myself,” he grunts as you struggle to take him, spit bubbling around your lips and dripping to the floor. Joel’s body is curved forward, his stomach tensed as he fucks down your throat. He feels your muscles constrict quickly, telling him you’re about to vomit. Joel pulls out long enough for you to swallow back the vomit and catch your breath, his hand still locked in your hair, then immediately pulls you back over his cock and continues to selfishly use your throat.

When he feels the threat of vomit approaching again, Joel decides you’ve had enough. He wipes away the bubbly spit and mucus smeared over your face and neck. “On your back,” Joel orders, tugging his shirt over his head. “Panties off, NOW.” He nestles between your legs, spitting on two of his fingers before abruptly forcing them inside your cunt. Your eyes go wide, your back arching into a crescent as the sudden penetration overwhelms you. “You can take it,” Joel assures you, resting his cheek against your inner thigh, occasionally kissing the soft skin there while he fingers you. “Been smellin’ this little pussy all day, y’know that?” Joel smirks. “All the time we were goin’ back and forth at each other, I knew you were makin’ a mess all over your panties…”

Joel yanks his fingers from inside you and spanks your pussy, making you cry out. He doesn’t give you any time to recover before shoving his fingers back inside, pumping your guts like he’s angry at them. “You need an attitude adjustment,” Joel mutters darkly. “And probably a back adjustment too, by the time I’m done with you.” He flips you onto your stomach with his fingers still inside you. There’s a pressure against your asshole as Joel pushes his thumb just past its puckering barrier, penetrating you there as well. “Look at that,” he says, admiring the way you wiggle your hips to encourage him. “Keep pushin’ back on me like that ‘n I’ll put another finger inside you. Wear you like a fuckin’ puppet.” Joel chuckles darkly, his fingers toying inside your holes. “Guess that’d be one way to fix your brat mouth, wouldn’t it? Make you my little puppet so you can’t talk shit anymore.”

He pulls his fingers from your pussy and pops them in his mouth, sucking your arousal off of them with a groan. “Fuckin’ heaven,” he murmurs. “There’s nothin’ I’d rather do more than to bury my face in your sweet little cunt and lick you till you’re beggin’ me to quit,” Joel adds. “But that’d be a treat, and you don’t deserve it after the way you bitched at me all afternoon.”

He’s kneeling between your legs, his eyes coasting over your back and ass, admiring the pretty marks his hand left on it. He spits into his palm and takes hold of his cock, pressing his tip just against your asshole. He feels you tense, and smirks behind you. “Don’t worry sweetheart,” Joel teases, guiding his tip lower. “I’m not gonna put it in your ass.” He spanks you with his cock, your lips quivering around his tip. “God knows if I did, you’d make a mess all over the place and have to spend the night cleaning shit and cum out of the carpet.” Joel bucks into your pussy without warning, your lips parting in a low groan. “This way,” he breathes against your neck, his body curved over yours. “All you’ll be cleaning up is cum.”

Joel closes his hand around your throat, holding you in place with your back in an arch. He forces his cock as deeply inside you as possible, pulling back a little when he feels your cervix against his tip. “Hold still,” he gruffly orders. “You want to make things right between us, don’t you?”

You nod as best you can with Joel’s hand around your throat.

“Then be a good girl and lay here while I use you, understand?”

He lets you answer definitively, just to check in and make sure you’re alright. Joel may have been hurt and pissed off by your antics earlier this afternoon, but under no circumstances would he ever abuse you. He needs to know you’re alright with the kind of language he’s using, and the easiest way to do that while remaining somewhat threatening is to ask, “You think you’re ready to take what I’m about to give you?”

“Yes,” you reply without hesitation, knowing full well that if you said no, Joel would immediately stop. “I’ve been such a bad girl.” You feel his cock twitch inside you, so you keep going. “Need you to teach me a lesson…”

…And Joel does. He beats your pussy into submission, fucking you like he hates you when in reality, Joel doesn’t think he could love you more without his heart bursting open. He’s laying across your back, his body almost flush with yours, hands pinning your wrists to the ground beside your head. He rests his forehead against the back of your hair, panting hot and wet over your neck. With his big hand still closed around your throat, Joel pistons into you so hard your tits are smacking against his forearm with every thrust.

Your ass bounces off his stomach each time they collide, his cock punching frenetically between your warm, moist walls. Joel feels himself getting close, and prays he has the self control to pull out in time. You’re fluttering around him in a way that tells him you’re on the edge as well, so he continues to fuck you at the same pace that’s brought you both to this point.

When you start to come, Joel has to pull out. He knows you don’t want to get pregnant right now and as deeply as he’s fucking you, there’s no way his cum would end up anywhere other than all over your cervix if he stayed inside you.

As soon as Joel pulls out, he stuffs two fingers back inside of you and keeps up the same pace as his cock before. You ride out your orgasm on his fingers, while Joel uses his other hand to stroke himself. “That’s a good fuckin’ girl,” he pants over your back, letting go of his cock just long enough to give your ass two hard swats. “Keep squeezin’ my fingers, just like that, fuck…” Joel closes his eyes and lets out a string of curses, his cock spilling warm and white all over his lap.

Your cheek is resting against the floor, a contented smile on your lips when Joel catches you watching him. “So,” he pants, trying to catch his breath. “Are we good, little girl?”

You bite your lip, nodding affirmatively. “Yeah,” you reply, your eyes getting heavy. “We’re definitely good.”

[tearsofcalamity]

ok read it. i am now unbelievably horny that was so good!!!! i just loove the idea of reader being barely awake, seeing aven Existing and going i need that twink destroyed Yesterday.

now bear w me cause while aven was going through the 5 stages of grief in that quest i was going through the infinite stages of horny and Thinking: i want soft sex w him really really bad he'd be my angel my pretty boy my golden little star! but the mf would be SUCH a tease! like he'd love you being gentle but after a while he'd start asking to "please, go rougher" and that he can "handle it" you'd go "no, baby, i want to love you softly" and he shuts up. and then you think he's given up but suddenly he is. all. over. you every second of everyday. he's not letting you do any work, his hand is on your thigh whenever you sit down next to him, he's whispering in your ear abt how good your dick (strap lol) makes him feel while yall are in public. just doing everything in his power to rile you up, so you will finally fuck the brains out of him. and when you finally snap and grab him by the arm and toss him on the bed all rough & furious he is Overjoyed, crazy fucking smile on his face. too bad your plans include taking him apart slowly and painfully, denying his release again and again while calling him all the sweet names under the sun before finally giving him what he's been begging for<3

LORD... LORD HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL ... !!!!!

no listen to me. he's so pent up and eager to have you just bend him in half and fuck him to the point where he's sobbing, he's so confident he can take it just fine. not that he minds you being so gentle with him, it still feels incredible, but he wants to feel what it's like to have your gaze dark with hunger on him as you fuck him into the sheets til he can't even breathe through his sobs.

but hear me out. aventurine can NOT take it. he's soooo sure of himself, doing all that teasing. playing footsie at fancy restaurants where you could easily get caught were he to go further, standing behind you to subtly rut against your back and pant right into your ear about how good it feels, begging you to just palm him just a lil bit, he promises he won't cum yet! no one will notice, he swears!

once you get him on the bed, he's so fucking excited, he can't believe he's actually got you all to himself and he can just tell by the look in your eyes you've got a rough night planned for him. but then you're switching between rough and soft, pinning him down while you jerk him without mercy and bring him to the edge over and over and over. he tries to hold out but he's sobbing and sniveling by the end of it, apologizing for riling you up and being bad in public. he just wants to hear you praise him, have your strap in him, but you won't give him what he wants.

eventually avennie's tears win you over, but you're not going to be gentle tonight. promise him he can cum with you inside him and then just absolutely pound him into the mattress until he's seeing stars. he's choking on every moan, and once you start throwing the petnames into the mix again, he's spurting out his load pathetically onto the sheets.

call him angel, darling, sweetheart, pretty boy, lovely, and don't forget to tell him how good he's being, of course. but don't stop when he cums. he had been begging you all day to be rough with him, to fuck him dumb, right? so don't stop when he finishes, instead, double down and overstimulate him until the pillow he's clutching onto is half-soaked with his tears and drool, until you have to hold his hips upright in order to keep fucking into him and nailing his achey prostate. maybe start jerking him here too, watch him wail into the pillow and thrust his hips back for more pleasure in spite of the overwhelming sensations he's going through...

I can't tell you whether this is gonna make him get more frisky in public to get the same ass ramming next time or if he's going to accept going back to the soft lovin you laved on him before. maybe both

[1-800-be-my-baby]

Could you write something where reader is best friends with Sarah and has had a crush on rafe for a long time. There’s some situation like going on vacation with the Cameron family and John b joins so the reader has to share a bed with rafe. He wakes up at night bc reader is having a wet dream, cuddled up next to/on him, grinding against his thigh. He gets really turned on and starts touching her & she wakes up. Maybe he teases her a bit like asking if she had a good dream, pointing out how wet she got his thigh and then they have sex. Reader is a bit embarrassed and shy about it. - 🧚🏻‍♂️

i love the way your brain works. also sorry i got a bit carried away. pt 2!

MDNI 18+

going on a yearly vacation with the cameron’s is not something new to you. you’d always share a room with sarah, staying up late the room filled with your giggles and hushed whispers. this time would be different though. sarah’s new boyfriend, john b would be tagging along. the new addition causing sleeping arrangements to be changed.

“what do you mean i have to share a room with rafe?” you stare at sarah, eyes nearly popping out of your head.

“it’ll be fine. rafe can just sleep on the floor!”

“no fucking way! i’m not sleeping in the same room as him!”

“pleaseeee? for me?” she clasps her hands together, giving you that look that makes you crumble everytime.

“jesus christ. fine. just this once. you owe me though.” you huff out. she lets out a loud squeal

“ohmygosh thank you so much! i definitely owe you big time!” you roll your eyes.

“yeah whatever. you’re lucky i love you.”

"i am not sleeping on the fucking floor" rafe snaps at you. irritated with the situation and ready to go to bed.

"fine i'll go find somewhere else to sleep then." you huff out crossing your arms. you begin to head towards the door when rafe calls out.

"jesus kid. this bed is big enough for the both of us to sleep and keep a good distance away from each other. what do you think m' gonna do?"

"i dunno. maybe suffocate me in my sleep or something." he lets out a laugh, he can't help but find your dramatics funny.

"just get in the fucking bed"

"fine. but keep your hands to yourself. i swear to god" you poke at him

"got it." he raises his hands in defense.

its 3 am when rafe wakes up to you practically laying on top of him, grinding on his thigh. he rubs his eyes, making sure he's awake and that this is really happening. you let out a quiet whimper as your brows furrow together. he stares down at you, a smirk forming on his face.

he allows his fingers to find your core, softly grazing over your cunt. he can feel the fabric that does little to cover you slowly becoming soaked. this pushes him over the edge as he moves ur panties to the side, slowly dragging his fingers through your folds catching on your clit. you let out a moan as your eyes begin to flutter open.

"rafe? what are you doing?"

"what am i doing? you were the one who woke me up, humping my leg like a bitch in heat. you're a cock hungry whore even when you're asleep.” you let out another moan, his fingers still rubbing at your clit.

"if you don't want this then tell me to stop." your hips begin to buck up involuntary. heat rises to your cheeks, thanking god that its dark and he can't see just how embarrassed you are. but with the pressure he's applying to your needy clit all rational thoughts leave your brain. your senses completely filled with rafe.

"rafe. please just fuck me. need it so bad." you let out a desperate whine, his teasing increasing your arousal, though still not enough.

"yeah that's what i thought." he shoves two thick fingers inside of you without any warning. causing you to take a sharp breath in. his fingers massage that spongy part that makes your head fuzzy and your eyes roll back. the band in your tummy tightening with each stroke of his fingers.

"you gonna cum?" you nod your head vigorously as you feel yourself getting closer to the edge.

"yeah? what happened to you wanting me to keep my hands to myself? over here makin' a mess all over my fingers."

"please rafe im so close. can i please cum? i need it" tears gather at your waterline. the burning in your stomach almost too much to handle.

"fuck. go ahead. cum for me baby. make a fucking mess." his words cause the band to snap, your orgasm washing over you soaking his hand and the sheets.

"good girl. that's it. let me have it." he helps you ride out your high before pulling his fingers out of your cunt. he brings his fingers to your mouth.

"gotta clean up the mess you made. yeah?"

[rogueddie]

Part one, Part two, Part three, Part four

For the next three days, Steve spends all his time hanging with El.

It's fun. She makes a little routine, once they find things they both enjoy, and does the best she can to make sure they're both happy. Steve is only confused when Hopper acts like she's really young- he can see how mature she is. She's practically a grown up!

It's calm, quiet, repetitive. That's why, when Hopper bursts inside one day, he's startled.

He's not supposed to be back for a while yet.

El is up, immediately, with a dark expression- like she's gearing up for battle. "What is it?"

"The Harringtons are home," Hopper says as he grabs some of the things the group had gathered, temporarily belonging to Steve. "They were asking too many questions. It's not safe for him here."

"Where will he go?"

"Munson said they can make room. They'd never think to look for him there and, knowing him, kid can probably hide him better than us."

El nods, satisfied, moving to help bag Steves things.

"Am I in trouble?" Steve finally asks.

"Not if I can help it," Hopper mutters.

"You are not in trouble," El quickly clarifies. "We are trying to make sure you are safe and happy. Eddie can do that for you, now that we can't. He cares for you. It will be ok."

"Do you promise?"

"I promise."

Neither let him help them get things together for him, reassuring him that they can take care of it- of him. El tries to include him, quietly asking him to get his yellow sweater.

But, soon, they're speeding out and and away from the little cabin that Steve has grown to love.

With how small and cramped it is, it felt so homely. Cozy. Lived in. Every corner is used for something, so many little signs of love and family- from the dishrack distant enough from the sink for two people to wash and dry, to the polaroids of El and her friends stuck to the walls.

It's why, when they pull into the trailer park, Steve feels hopeful.

The door opens, as soon as they stop, Eddie darting out to meet them in the middle. He grabs the bag, crouching a little to scoop Steve up and hold him on his hip, the same way Robin did.

"I got him," he says, reassuring. He looks too frantic for it to be convincing. "Go."

"Keep your radio on," Hopper replies. "Stay safe, kid!"

The engine starts up, pulling out and away, before Eddie can even step inside the trailer.

Another man is there, lounging on the sofa- he offers a small wave when he notices Steve looking, voice low and warm when he says; "hey kid, you alright?"

Steve nods, a little too nervous from the rush and new place to speak.

"I'm gonna get him set up in my room," Eddie explains, as he starts towards the hallway.

"Yell if you need anything!"

"That's my uncle," Eddie explains, as he steps inside the end room. Theres marks and tack on the wall, where posters used to be displayed but since taken down. "He's a big ol' softie, don't worry. He's gonna love you."

It takes Steve a moment to notice that the matress is the only bed in the room.

"Stay out of this draw," Eddie says, snapping his fingers to get Steves attention. He glances at the drawers, before patting the top. "Actually, don't go in any of these. Out of bounds, got it?"

"Out of bounds," Steve repeats, nodding.

"I'm gonna have to hang these up with my stuff," Eddie continues, opening his wardrobe. "Or... in this little box? Yeah, that's perfect, I'll just put them in here."

The box is sat at the very bottom, not too high and out of Steves reach.

"Uh... my guitars, too, don't touch them."

"I won't touch your things without asking."

"Thanks. But that's all, I think. Any questions?"

"Where am I sleeping?"

"There." He points to the mattress.

"Oh... where will you sleep?"

"The sofa. Wayne and I have a whole schedule figured out. It's a pull out bed, don't stress, it's fine."

"But your bed is here."

"And you're sleeping here."

"But it... you should sleep here. It's your room."

"Would you rather share?"

Steve looks to the mattress. It's not big, barely more than a single, but he's still small. Eddie is thin.

"Yes?"

"Boys!" Eddies uncle calls, before Eddie can reply. "Food!"

"We'll talk more at bedtime, alright?" Eddie offers.

Dinner is a quiet affair. Eddie seems uncomfortable the entire time, eventually admitting that they don't usually sit down for dinner- but Wayne quickly points out that they used to, when he was a kid. He points out that Steve deserves a nice family sit down too.

Steve struggles to keep him mouth shut, face neutral, at that. Despite only just meeting the man, the ease at which he offers his home and family is... Steve isn't sure. But it makes his stomach squirm, full of warmth and affection.

Most of the day is spent in front of the TV. Eddie is the only one really watching though- Wayne spends most of the time teaching Steve how to play cards.

The sky is turning dark with the setting sun when someone starts frantically pounding at the door.

"Where is he?" A familiar voice asks, when Eddie finally answers the door. "Hop said he's here, right?"

"He's here, come on."

Wayne gestures for Steve to come back out the little cupboard Eddie hard pointed to, for him to hide in.

"Steve," Robin sighs, crouching down so she can pull him into a painfully tight hug. "Are you ok? How are you doing? Do you need anything? Are you safe here? I can-"

"Buckley," Eddie snaps. He's smiling though, playfully smacks her shoulder. "He's fine, we're taking care of him."

"Good, that's good," she says, voice distant. She's too distracted, looking him over. She pauses when she lifts his hand, spotting the nail polish. "Oh, wow. These are, uh... really pretty. I didn't know you could paint nails so good."

"El did them," he quietly admits. He glances from Wayne to Eddie-

Who holds up his own hand, showing the black nail polish he's wearing.

"Not as cute as your yellow, but hey, black is my color."

"Black isn't a color, dipshit," Robin snorts.

Steve looks to Wayne, who wiggles his eyebrows when Eddie and Robin start bickering- which quickly devolves into playful wrestling.

"Ed," Wayne says, clicking his tongue. "Time."

"Oh, fuck," Robin replies, jumping up. "I have to go."

"So soon?" Steve frowns.

"Aw, don't give me those eyes, I have to! I wasn't meant to go out at all. I'll come back tomorrow, ok? I'll figure out something we can do. Deal?"

"Deal!"

Once Wayne has seen Robin out, he turns to Eddie with a raised brow. "Time for Steve to sleep, Eds."

"It's only-"

"Ed."

"Yeah, yeah, alright. Come on, big boy."

Standing in Eddies room, they both stare at the mattress. Steve turns to him, hands on his hips, raising his eyebrows at him.

He rolls his eyes, grumbling, "alright, fine, we'll try both of us. But don't whine when we don't fit or you're uncomfortable!"

He continues grumbling, as he digs through the wardrobe and some drawers, muttering about how he hasn't had to wear a pajama set for years.

Steve points to the bed, once they're both changed; "you get in first."

"Bossy."

Once Eddies laying down, Steve crawls in beside him, curling up to his side the way he does with his mother. It's so rare that she'd let him spend a night cuddled with her, but it's always brought so much comfort.

He's surprised that it's no different when it's Eddie that he's cuddling up to- he thinks it might be better. There's no complaints about sharing space with him, rather about the space.

"Is this ok?" He has to ask.

"Yeah," Eddie mumbles, shifting a little, arm curling a little tighter around him. "Yeah, it's alright."

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[ronearoundblindly]

Hi Lexi!

I have a situation for you to think about: how would any of the men you write behave if they were coming home late (after work or a night out) and their partner was already asleep in bed?

Who trips over the couch? Who stealthily sneaks into bed? Who crashes fully clothed? And so on and so forth? I guess it’s a hc of sorts

Hope your wknd was/is great! 💜

Eeeee, this one's gonna be so fun, M! Thank you for such an interesting query 😍--some of these will involve early on in relationships and then later when babe is most comfortable with their partner--some of them are a twinge smutty/soft!dark.

**Oh snap, some of these surprised me too, dearies! Proceed with caution...**

James Mace - The Practical Man

Mace arrives home to assess a 'tipping point' in himself and you. He only does everything as he normally would, exactly as he would do it if you were awake. He tosses his keys those last few inches onto the hall table, turns on any lights he needs, pulls a glass from the cupboard for water, and brushes his teeth with the door open. If you're still sleeping when he's ready for bed, then that's fine. You're clearly tired. He could use rest, too. No problem. If you wake up, Mace likes to tell you about his day, even if your comments are mumbled with closed eyes and all he can do is pet his thumb across your cheek before you dose off again.

He likes sweet, slow kisses goodnight. He'll cuddle if you pull him in, but otherwise, he'll give you space. He doesn't want to overheat you. Mace's one, super-particular bedtime thing is saying "see you in the morning." Sounds simple, yeah, but in space, he doesn't get to--to say it or to see you or to really know it's morning. It's that tiny bit of reassurance that helps him relax into bed.

Curtis Everett - The Stealthy Spice

For lack of a better term, Curtis has night-vision. He never trips over anything, he can do everything in the dark just like the lights were on, and he makes next to no noise doing it. For when you are deep in sleep, that's great because him getting into bed won't startle you. If you're sleeping lightly? You practically slap him.

He's ready for that scenario, too, and grabs your wrists before you make contact. Starting with soothing words, he'll talk you down. Curtis is always sorry to alarm you, but his apology doesn't cover regret that you're awake now because he works very hard, very long days and misses you frequently. His shifts are so long he doesn't have much evening time with you during his work week. (He will, in fact, crash on the couch if he knows you have something big going on the next day and need rest, for what it's worth.)

We all joke that Curtis is a dirty boi, but truly, I do believe that once this man is comfortable with stable life, he is about that booty. He's 'calming you down' with that soft cooing at the same time he's sucking that sweet spot on your neck. Once he releases your fighting wrists, he's groping your ass and pinching your nipples. He'll wear you both out so you sleep again. Please let him. He will beg if necessary.

Jimmy Dobyne - The Handsy Drunk

Ok, I love Jimmy, but he is a pretty traditional dude. He requires/expects a certain type of effort from his partner, so if he's the breadwinner, you fulfill his other needs. He drinks out with friends and co-workers frequently as his way of shaking off a day of manual labor. Not a big texter or phone-talker, this one. Jimmy is more of a physical-contact partner. He has difficulty engaging in long, emotional conversations, so he uses touch to work through frustration. I am not talking about being violent, mind, just rougher at times, and this is where I get the idea of Jimmy being the most dominant of the characters I write for from (save for Lloyd obviously).

Jimmy is the classic man. Could be horny enough to wake you. Could be exhausted enough to just pass out. Could be too drunk to find his way to the bedroom entirely without tripping/running into furniture. All those things: that's Jimmy, and if he's been out late without you at all, it was either from being at work the entire time or out drinking after work. Ok, wait, technically he'll play golf with buddies, too, but they also drink then so kinda the same idea.

Johnny Storm - The Man Who Can't Stop

Hyper. Johnny is gd hyper and needs to be doing things--anything--almost every second he's awake. He tries to be quiet but also forgets to be quiet. He gets restless. He moves around a lot while he sleeps. He has weird dreams but not what he'd call 'nightmares.' Johnny sometimes needs to wake you up in order to calm down. He needs company because imagine how lonely flying is? Sure, the solitude is welcome sometimes, but otherwise, there is no one around. All his adrenaline-junkie activities, i.e. snowboarding, motocross, etc, are solo sports; he has fun with them, but they aren't interactive.

Now for the actual fun part of his return home: given permission from his partner, Johnny will at least begin doing whatever he wants whether you're awake or not, and he really, really enjoys seeing how far he can get before you do stir. Mouth, fingers, or full cock (in that order); it's one extra game he likes to play.

Jake Jensen - Must Wind Down

Jake cannot go to bed right after getting home; he needs at least two hours, preferably three to four, to do non-work things and clear his mind. Usually, it's gaming--when you are already asleep or if you're watching a show he isn't into--but could also be bingeing something with you. Before bed is playtime. Jake has that anxious energy he has to burn off, and when you're already out cold, he will not bother you unless you call for him or come out of the bedroom. Just his way.

He's got the path from door to home office down pat, and he doesn't need any light on to get there (barring something randomly moved or left in the way).

Very important point here is that Jake doesn't drink much without you. He'll have a friendly nightcap with the Team, and they do play actual games while having alcohol sometimes. They don't play drinking games though--specifically, Jake won't participate in drinking games without you. He gauges how much he drinks by how much you do, and he ensures you're both safe to get home/stay somewhere. He never comes home drunk. Loopy tired? Yes. Inebriated? No.

Lloyd Hansen - The Selfish Asshole

Moot point. Lloyd doesn't even sleep in the same bed as his partner. Sorry, gang, he does not give a shit about you or your beauty sleep. If he wants to fuck you, he will go right in, roll you onto your stomach, and take what he wants. That's just Lloyd.

Ari Levinson - Can't Hide His Feelings

He is affected by his day, and whether that means Ari is spitting-mad at some stupid shit others pulled at work or he's raving excited about something coming down the pipeline, he shows it. So, what does that mean for you? It means if Ari wants to be alone, he won't disturb you, but if he needs company, he's gonna wake you up.

It's led to arguments because he does not always think that through. He may have the power to keep his brain turned off while you speak to him tired; you don't really get that luxury. However, Ari is also very affecting in his attention. He's not taking his moods out on you like some of the others. Ari is improving his mood by being with you and will make it worth your waking while.

Ransom Drysdale - Silent Signals

Like two others (Curtis and Steve), Ransom evolves from closed-off/reserved to more open the longer he's with someone.

Ran, at first, does not spend the night or stay for long periods. Once he does, he is still very conscious of personal space (mostly for him and then eventually for you, too). Moving in together doesn't change that for another long while... Ran is slow to warm up.

He does absolutely get drunk and come home boldly horny--by that, I mean, the type of horny that needs intimacy as well--and crawl right into bed for sloppy, desperate, snuggly sex. The level of drunkenness required to get to that point diminishes over time, as his trust increases, but otherwise, Ran refuses to crash on a lumpy, small, angular couch, he refuses to sleep in anything with buttons or zippers or thick seams, and he refuses to compromise on resting comfortably. He will complain--and do so very loudly--if he is not comfy. Hotel staff beware.

Steve Rogers - Ever-Thoughtful

You know, you all know, how much I love Steve, but he's also just slow in his way. He needs lots of encouragement and permission, and, of course, Steve never assumes anything. That would make an ass out of him and his partner. Can't have that. Nope. Not a chance.

There's a wonderful part about this trait though.

Steve always considers you. He always listens to you. He doesn't rush either. So not only will Steve know if you need sleep more than company, not only will he have filed away your mood and body language over the last day and week, but he will also slowly complete his nighttime routine, making zero noise, keeping light and movement to a minimum.

Painstakingly slow, he'll get into bed, wait for you to naturally turn into him, and hold you. He's patient, but Steve is also not afraid to admit he enjoys seeing your peaceful face. He enjoys being right there in case it contorts in fear or pain. He simply enjoys being there, awake or asleep, in love or in support, as much as possible.

Bucky Barnes - Ever-Interested

He's complicated, but the fight Bucky goes through eternally is in his own mind now. He doesn't know where he falls on a scale of brash-young-heartthrob-soldier to brainwashed-loner-skiptime-assassin. He hasn't lived the in-between moments for most of his life. He struggles with that.

Bucky gives in to moments of quiet humanity, sure, but he still defaults to efficiency, even at the cost of comfort. When I say this is a war within him, I'm not putting it lightly. He can't shake what I'll call 'The Calculation.'

What does his own body need in this moment? Is it food or water or sex or sleep? Will getting what he wants jeopardize the next thing he'll need? If he needs food but nothing is available without making noise that will wake you, and he doesn't want or need to talk before he sleeps, then he has to choose based on that. If he needs release but not the mirror intimacy, he has to find a way to indulge in you without waking you.

Except there's a somewhat secret part of this: Bucky always wants you. There is always a part of him craving either the carnal pleasure or the emotional connection or the validation of sex, all for different reasons at different times. He understands the value of possessing you in some way. It's too difficult for him to describe in a way that doesn't make him sound like a scumbag (or so he believes), therefore, Bucky still slips into those Winter Soldier skills to keep his dirty little secret from tainting how you see him: for every night he does wake you--sweet and innocent with cuddles or love-making--there are two nights where he silently watches, thinking of all that he needs or could take from you as he touches himself.

😵‍💫 wait, What was that one???? 🫣

[Main Masterlist; 'Who Would...' List; Ko-Fi]

A/N: This was actually a whole lot harder than I thought it would be. Pretty sure some of these aren't going to go over very well either, but eh, that's my lot in life and we can each see the characters however we want, right?

[tubbytarchia]

Actually I'm gonna need a little insanity thread for all the rancher things I love as I watch their POV for the first time. I'll publicize this when I'm done with ep5

TLDR: Heavens, it is a long list. I cannot tldr this

Them running around in circles, completely lost after their first deaths whilst also not expressing even the slightest bit of anger (esp Jimmy because you know)

Them expecting the other to know how to build but neither of them can

Tango building a box of a house and Jimmy being absolutely smitten by it continuously

Tango praising Jimmy with full genuinity for bringing back... a bucket of water

Them cradling one little chicken like its their offspring before they can get more

Jimmy standing behind the door, calling for Tango in order to surprise him with cows.... god help my heart

Tango declaring them as team ranchers to immediately admit he might not be a very good rancher. This is good and cute because I love to see them struggle yet have unbridled support towards each other

Jimmy being cornered by Joel and Etho so Tango leaves to save him (or so he says at least!)

Jimmy ushering Tango into their house as Tango yells for help due to his hunger and being chased by mobs, and then Jimmy giving him two melon slices because that's all he has (They are so pathetically poor which only accentuates the wholesome and cute factor)

Jimmy accidentally picking up Tango's baked potato and then handing it back to him so they can eat together while Tango basically foams out the mouth because he's so hungry

"Welcome home honey"

Them celebrating being able to feed themselves to any degree

Tango all "I built that wall, it's ugly, continuing the trend" only for Jimmy to immediately proclaim that he likes it

Jimmy catching on that Tango can be a great builder actually and confronting him about it like he's just been cheated on

Tango blocking their entrance to prevent more cows from leaving for Jimmy to then admit that he was the one that broke the door, oops

Tango watching Jimmy escort two goats from a distance "he's doing great"

Them in total confusion wasting way too much time trying to figure out how to get goat horns as they're huddled in their house with said goats strolling around (and them continuing to get butted casually as they go about their normal activities) before eventually choosing to waste much more time by trying to do the same thing outside

Unrelated but Pearl of all people being the first person to come to them with genuine help rather than to fuck with them like everyone else

In the face of all their struggles, the thing that seems to bring the absolute most joy to Tango and Jimmy by this point is obtaining a silly little goat horn

The fact that they both got the exact same goat horn!!!

"I need stuff for tools, and I need stuff for Jimmy"

Tango defending their base's looks despite proclaiming to be a bad builder, because god, I want him to be doing that just because of how much Jimmy praised it

Nobody replying to their goat horns, but THEM replying to each other!! (They also toot at each other later when frantically looking for each other agh!!)

This time Tango interrogating Jimmy as if he's been cheated on because Jimmy went into the deep dark without his approval

"The R survived"

"Tango snap out of it; Tango's having a moment" *Tango yelling and groaning and grunting and laughing continuously*

"Tango, Tango, let's think about this. Let's think about this!" "Hold me back" "Tango, listen to the horn" Jimmy calming his deranged husband aw

Tango burying his head in a corner refusing to look at his beautiful ranch in complete ruin even as Jimmy coaxes him

Jimmy and Tango kind of begrudgingly accepting Scar trying to be nice but Jimmy still valiantly defending the foot tower before it burned to the ground

Their son/daughter :( (Tango refers to the Warden as a she one episode and a he in another. Their child was an icon...)

Tango expressing that he's proud of Jimmy for having stayed alive so long and Jimmy replying "It's all down to to you. Hey, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you"

Maybe Jimmy really didn't have a water bucket on him but it was so funny of him to casually turn to Tango whilst on fire and go "can you put me out?"

Jimmy being comically kidnapped??? (Actually being put into gay baby jail instead) And asking Tango to help save him

"You're still here? It's over. Go home. Go." (insert a bunch of crying emojis)

Other stuff: I think by virtue of Jimmy being a real tall guy, his character is usually depicted as taller than Tango's if not significantly so. As such... Tango calling Jimmy "little man" tickles me greatly and sounds like a very fond pet name

Briefly brought it up earlier but goddd. I will absolutely hc that Tango only became proud and defendant of his work because of how much Jimmy liked what he built. And Jimmy always being there and calming Tango in his crazed outbursts <3 Tango is such a goddamn creature isn't he

And the uhh... Tango dying quickest out of anyone because of a creeper, to then express that he was proud of Jimmy for doing well even though he got them killed the first time around, and then Jimmy unceremoniously dying to an Enderman to end their series for good... As funny and poetic as it is, god, the canary curse fuckin hurts!! And yet there were hardly times that Tango showed disdain towards Jimmy, and then never genuinely. He knew their series could end quick with Jimmy as his soulmate and even when their positivity faltered, their support towards one another never did

For having read all this (or maybe just glancing and scrolling)... some unfinished rancher doodles just for you that I made while watching their POV

:)

[drabbles-mc]

Ever the Gentleman

Jax Teller x OC Natasha Moreno

Summary: When Natasha came back to Charming after hitting more than a few bumps in the road, she hadn't been ready to see Jax again. Things were complicated enough without all her old feelings bubbling up to the surface again. But all it took was one little look from Jax for her to know that she was just as done for now as she had been back then.

Warnings: 18+, light angst, smut, language, alcohol

Written for the First Time Exchange 2024

Word Count: 10.1k

A/N: Picked up this as a pinch hit in an exchange and thought i was just gonna write a quick little story about childhood friends seeing each other after a long time away and suddenly it was 10k and i didn't know what i was doing with myself anymore lmfao. Anyway!! Hope y'all enjoy!

The bike he saw when he pulled into the gas station wasn’t one that he recognized. It wasn’t a Harley, not like the bike any of the guys in the club rode. It was sleeker, sportier than that. The type of thing that could easily slice through traffic and lanes on the highway if someone was feeling brave enough. Even parked underneath the half-shade by the gas pump, enough light still hit it to cast a glint off the clean black paintjob.

The bell on the frame chimed as he walked in. The young girl behind the counter looked up, a smile instantly spreading across her face when she saw that it was Jax who had entered. She nodded in greeting before getting back to making change for the customer standing in front of her, an older gentleman who wasn’t nearly as enamored by who had just strode through the door.

When he reached the back wall where all of the refrigerators were situated, racks of soda and beer and water bottles, he gave himself a couple seconds to see if he really wanted anything before turning to look and see who else was standing there. Any thoughts of playing it cool or casual disappeared when he saw the woman standing hardly two yards away from him.

She looked different now, although he supposed that he didn’t look the same as when he graduated high school either. Some days it felt like it was just yesterday even though it wasn’t. Her hair was longer now than it had been back then, blonde and light brown highlights breaking up the long dark waves that fell down past her shoulders. The tattoos were new. Or, at least, Jax didn’t remember her having any that he could see back then—that hadn’t been quite her style. He could see some of them poking out now, though, ink spilling out from beneath her rolled up sleeves, peaking out from under the crop-top that she was wearing. They stood out against her tanned skin that was somehow even more sun kissed than it had been before. He wondered what the full picture of them was.

She wasn’t paying him any mind as he took another step closer to her. She was reaching to pull the door to one of the refrigerator sections open when Jax finally decided that it was time to speak up. “Well, well, well,” he said with a chuckle as he continued to collapse the distance between them, “if it isn’t little miss Natty Ice.”

Her head snapped in his direction, the anger on her face changing to a smile and then feigned annoyance when she saw who it was that was speaking to her. She braced her hand flat against the door that she’d been thinking about opening. “Most people these days just call me Natasha, you know.” She tried to sound bothered but a smile was still fighting to curl the ends of her lips.

The smirk on his face was familiar, and the jury was out on if that was a welcome familiarity or not. “Yeah, but where’s the fun in that?” He leaned against the door next to the one she was about to open, the flannel he was wearing underneath his kutte protecting him from the cold glass.

Natasha made a point to look him up and down slowly. Her eyes lingered longer on his kutte than almost anything else, at least until she was looking him in the eyes. “Something tells me you’ve been having plenty of fun, Jackson.”

Jax chuckled and shook his head. “Lotta shit might’ve changed since you left, but it’s still only my mom who calls me that.” There was a pause, just the two of them taking each other in a little longer before he said, “So?”

She tilted her head in the opposite direction, brows pulling towards each other in confusion. “So...?”

He pushed himself back off the door. “So what’s the hot shot doing back here in little old Charming? Thought you were outta here for good.”

She scoffed and shook her head. Finally pulling the door open, she grabbed a bottle of soda from the top shelf. “Yeah, you and me both.” She let the door fall shut, allowing it to bounce from the force before it settled before turning so that she was facing him again. “Getting laid off tends to throw a wrench in the plans, though.”

The smug look on Jax’s face disappeared instantly. “Shit.”

“Yeah,” she dragged the word out long enough to get chuckles out of both of them. Clearing her throat, she said, “Well, it was good catching up. I’ll see—”

“Oh come on,” he cut her off, laughing. “How long you even been back? How long you been dodging me?”

She shook her head at him as she started to walk towards the front of the store to cash out. “You think an awful lot of yourself if you think that’s why you haven’t seen me since I’ve been home.”

“Yeah? How long has that been, then?” He popped up next to her at the cash register, gently nudging her to the side before talking to the girl behind the counter. “I got hers. Just grab me a pack of—”

“The usual,” she finished for him with a tiny smile and a nod. “You got it.”

Natasha rolled her eyes so hard Jax was surprised that they didn’t get stuck in the back of her head. It didn’t stop him from continuing his usual song and dance as he put a couple bills on the counter. He flashed the girl a smile as she gave him his pack of smokes. “Thanks, darlin’.”

Natasha was shaking her head at Jax, but still gave the girl a sincere, albeit far less flirtatious, thank you before carrying right on towards the door. It was only when Jax caught up to her, catching the door that she was about to let slam shut in his face, that she said, “Can’t believe you’re still at it with that whole schtick.”

He laughed, shrugging as he tucked the cigarettes away in his kutte. “Hey, if it ain’t broke.” The two of them were standing just to the side of the door when he repeated his question one more time.

She didn’t bother waiting for him as she started walking off towards the gas pumps. Jax watched her for a second before he got his feet to start moving. “Hey, wait up.” She stopped and turned, waiting for him to close the gap between them. Once he did, the usual smug expression on his face dimmed, something slightly more genuine taking its place. “What’s going on with you?”

She shrugged. “Nothing.”

“Nothing?” He chuckled. “C’mon, Natty—you’re still not that good of a liar.”

“I haven’t lied to you yet.”

“No?” he asked, his tone goading in a way that was impossible to miss. When she just shook her head in response, a neutral expression on her face, Jax figured it was as good of a time as any to nettle her. “You miss me?”

Another eye roll. Another step farther away from him. “Oh fuck off.”

He laughed as he kept stride with her. “C’mon. How long you been gone? You’re not a little happy to see me?”

She stopped by the bike that was still parked by the gas pump. “I’m ecstatic,” she answered, her tone flat but there was still a glimmer in her eyes giving her away.

It took Jax a couple seconds longer than it should have to put it all together. He watched as she took another sip of her soda before shoving the bottle into the backpack that was resting on the seat of the bike. He looked back and forth between her and the bike a couple times before he said anything. His brain trying to sync up the mental image of who she was before she left Charming to the woman who was standing in front of him now.

Natasha watched him process his way through it all, too. She didn’t say anything about it as she pulled the straps of her backpack back onto her shoulders. She felt the way Jax was watching her in what almost seemed like awe as she slipped her hands into the gloves that she wore to ride. Not that she gave it too much thought, but she was fairly certain that there hadn’t ever been a time in history when he stared at her like that. She would’ve noticed, would’ve remembered.

When she reached for her helmet, that’s when Jax got himself to speak up. “How many times did Ope and I try to get you on the backs of our bikes and you said no? Now you’re—”

“To be fair,” she cut him off, propping her helmet on her hip as she spoke, “I still wouldn’t get on the back of either of your bikes.”

He chuckled, holding his hands out innocently. “Why not?”

She didn’t dignify the question with a response, instead swinging her leg over the bike to start getting situated. She still hadn’t put her helmet on yet—once she did that Jax knew it meant she was going to be jetting off whether he had said his piece or not.

“Where you staying now, anyway?” he asked.

She shrugged, the expression on her face not exactly an excited one. “Back home. Just until I figure out what my next move is. I didn’t wanna sign a lease on a place if I’m just going to be moving again in another month or two.”

“Bet your mom is—”

“Way too excited about it, yeah,” she finished the sentence for him with a laugh. There was a beat of a pause, both of them waiting to see if the other was going to say anything more. The feeling, the slight flutter in her chest, it was kicking up a feeling of dejavu that she hadn’t experienced yet in her two weeks at home. Clearing her throat, she decided that enough was enough for now. “Well, it was good seeing you. I gotta run, though. I’ll see you around?”

“You should come by the clubhouse,” he offered with a grin. “Got the bike now and everything.”

She shook her head before pulling her helmet on. Sliding the face shield up, she said, “Hard pass. Thanks though.”

“C'mon. Ope and Donna will be there.”

She gripped onto the handlebars, leaning forward to brace against them. “Yeah? Tara too?”

It was the first time Jax faltered throughout their entire conversation. “No, no. Tara took off, shit,” his hand rested on the back of his neck for a moment, “couple months after you, actually.”

She frowned in thought for a moment, the expression partially obscured by her helmet. It wasn’t the response that she had been expecting from him. She was caught between shock and a tiny shred of relief, immediately followed by guilt over her initial reaction. Regardless, it wasn’t going to change her answer to the question.

“Right,” the word came out sounding jilted, forced in a way that the rest of their conversation hadn’t been. “Well, either way,” she shook her head, “still isn’t my scene.” She brought her bike to life and Jax took a tiny step back out of habit. “I’ll see you.”

He cracked a grin as he watched her slide her face shield back down. “I’m sure you will.”

~*~

It was a couple days later when her mother knocked on her bedroom door. Natasha looked up from her laptop screen, a welcome break from the dozen or so tabs open of different jobs she was thinking of applying for. “Yeah?”

Her mom held out the phone, a landline that Natasha was willing to bet money only ever had incoming calls from her when she lived out of state. “For you.”

She cocked her head in confusion but reached out and took the phone. She said a quick and quiet thank you to her mother before bringing the phone to her ear. “Hello?”

“Never got your number,” Jax’s voice came through with a chuckle on the other end of the line. “Had to go digging but I figured your parents never got rid of the house phone.”

“Creatures of habit, all of you.” She laughed quietly.  “What’s with the house call, then?”

“You didn’t wanna come by the clubhouse—how else was I supposed to talk to you?”

Natasha shook her head even though he couldn’t see it, placing her laptop off to the side of her on the bed. She allowed herself to flop back onto her mattress, her head not even reaching her pillow with the way that she was laying. “I guess I didn’t think that you’d wanna talk to me that bad. Never called me up while I was gone.”

“Didn’t have your number then either,” he quipped.

She hummed in acknowledgment. “I guess not.” She paused, waiting for him to speak up. When he didn’t, she had to laugh. “Figured if you made the effort to call, you’d at least have a conversation in mind.”

“Wanna grab a drink?”

“That depends,” she said, letting the back of her hand that wasn’t holding the phone rest against her forehead. “Do you know a place to get a drink that’s not on the Sons compound?”

He laughed. “Yeah, I think I could figure something out.”

“Can’t wait to see it, then.”

“You gonna give me your number so I don’t have to go through your mom every time I wanna talk to you?”

Natasha laughed hard enough that it took her a moment to be able to respond. “Too much like old times?”

“Nah, I don’t even think I had to do that when it was old times.”

Her laughter quieted into a hum. “Should’a called more.” There was a beat of silence and she cleared her throat. “Anyway. Got a pen or something ready? I’m only gonna tell you once.”

She knew that she shouldn’t have felt excited to go and see him. It wasn’t just the joy of getting back in touch with old friends, although there was that part of it too. But she also knew that, for all the time that she’d been out of Charming and away from Jax, for all the ways that she had changed over the years, there was still something to be said for the fact that she was going to be meeting up to grab drinks with Jackson Teller, the boy she spent three out of the four years of high school being infatuated with. He'd felt so unobtainable then—still did, in a lot of ways. But the stakes were different now. They were older. He was, presumably, single. But she also knew that she didn’t really know him anymore, or him her. A lot could’ve changed in the time that she’d been gone. A lot had changed, at least for her. Even knowing all of that, though, she still felt a warmth spreading across her face as she grabbed the keys to her bike to go and meet him. Plenty of things had changed but apparently some things still hadn’t, no matter the front that she put on.

She spotted his bike when she pulled up outside the bar. She parked her bike right next to his, smiling to herself at the differences between the two. She’d gotten her bike during her second year of college, a decision that nearly gave her mother a heart attack but there was no going back on it once it was done. The argument then was that her parents weren’t going to have to watch her ride around on it anyway, so they didn’t have to worry. Natasha was surprised, really, at how little grief her mother had given her about it since she came back home. Too many other things going on.

Natasha couldn’t deny that she was a little surprised by the choice in venue. It wasn’t high-class by any means, which she was thankful for because she certainly hadn’t dressed the part for that. But it wasn’t really a dive bar, either. It wasn’t like the clubhouse—more orderly than places like that. The music was loud enough so keep people from eavesdropping on conversations, but not so loud that you couldn’t hear the person sitting across the table from you. The most surprising part of it all to Natasha was the fact that the place was well-lit. She didn’t picture Jax hanging out in bars that you didn’t have to squint to see in.

She saw him sitting at a two-top just a couple feet from the bar. He was already looking at her when she saw him, that same smirk on his face. He had a glass of beer in front of him, which he lifted in greeting once she saw him. She gave a small wave and a nod before going over to the bar.

Once she told the girl behind the bar what beer she wanted, she asked, “Did my friend over there open a tab?” The woman nodded and Natasha cracked a smile. “First one’s on him, then.” She swiped the glass off the bar-top. “Thank you.”

Natasha walked over to the table where Jax was sitting. He was watching her, a smirk on his face as she got situated and took a sip of her drink. “Glad you found it.”

Natasha laughed, leaning forward and bracing her arms on the tabletop. “What’s a guy like you doing in a nice place like this?”

He shook his head at her. “Figured it might be more your speed.”

She smiled. “That’s fair. Just, you know,” she took another sip, “surprised they let you in the door.”

He rolled his eyes but he was still smiling. “I know a guy.”

She laughed. “You always do.”

The conversation picked up and Natasha found herself waiting for it to get uncomfortable, but it didn’t. She asked about Opie, a little bit about the club, the things that she was part of back when she still lived in Charming. They dug up just enough old memories to laugh at without getting too caught up in it all. There was a familiarity there between them that she didn’t remember having with him before. Maybe there were always too many other people around. This was one of the first times that she didn’t feel like she was fighting for his attention—teenage Natasha would’ve been over the moon about it.

Jax asked her about her parents. He saw them around every now and again but it wasn’t like they ever really made the time to talk and catch up—the only thing they really had in common was Natasha and that might’ve been stretching it a bit on his part. He asked her about school even though it was too little too late. He wanted to ask about work, about what had happened, but he didn’t know if he could.

“You figure out if you’re gonna stick around?” he asked, figuring it was as safe of a question as any.

She laughed. “In the two days since I last saw you? No, no I haven’t figured that out yet.”

He smiled, blue eyes brighter than they had any right to be. “I could get you a job at T-M if you want.”

She rolled her eyes. “Jax—”

“What? It’s basically the same thing, right? Should be easier, actually. Car engines are way smaller than plane engines.”

Natasha was trying not to laugh and failing. “They’re not the same at all, actually. But even if they were,” she finished off her beer, “it’s not like you could afford me anyway.”

Jax had a smirk on his face as he swirled around what little was still left in his glass. “You’re the one living with Mom and Dad, so I dunno. I don’t think you can afford you either.”

She scoffed in mock offense. “Fuck you.”

He laughed and held his hands up in surrender. “I’m just callin’ ‘em like I see ‘em, Natty. Don’t get mad at me about it.”

She pushed her empty glass towards him. “I might be willing to forgive you if you get me another round.”

Jax didn’t even bother putting up a fight about it. He finished off his drink in one swig before getting up out of his chair. He grabbed his empty glass and Natasha’s, heading off towards the bar with a, “Coming right up,” as he went. Natasha laughed, shaking her head at him. She couldn’t help but to watch him as he sauntered up to the bar. She watched the way that the bartender was all smiles and batting eyelashes as Jax spoke to her. Everywhere Natasha went she seemed to be reminded that certain things about Jax didn’t change, and probably never would.

The flutters in her stomach were dampened by the knot that was starting to form. Part of it was Jax, the brutal reminder that he hadn’t given her any undivided attention back then, probably still wouldn’t be able to give it to her now. The other part of it, though, had nothing to do with Jax and everything to do with the series of events that led to her coming back home. It hadn’t been her choice, and it hadn’t been anything as simple as getting laid off from her job. No one really knew that, though. She tried not to think about it all if she could help it, but something about the butterflies in her stomach when she looked at Jax made it hard to forget.

When Jax turned back around to bring their drinks, he saw the change in expression on Natasha’s face. He cocked his head to the side as he walked back over, a wordless ask of what was wrong. Natasha gave an equally wordless answer by simply shaking her head. Jax wanted to press it as he set the glass down in front of her, but he stopped himself.

She nodded towards the bartender. “That the uh,” she took a sip of her beer, “guy you know?”

He cracked a grin. “Not quite.”

She shrugged. “Just seemed awfully friendly.”

His smile split a little wider. “I’m just a friendly guy.”

Natasha rolled her eyes and yet still found herself smiling. “One of your many endearing qualities.”

“So they say.” He paused, taking a drink. “What’s your deal these days anyway? You got a boyfriend you’re gonna bring back to Charming too?”

She laughed. “Please. If I had a boyfriend I would not be letting him inside county lines.”

“Why not? Afraid he can handle Natasha but not Natty?”

She waved him off with a laugh. “Fuck off.”

There was still a smirk on his face as he studied her expression. “I can’t tell if you’re lying to me or not just to save yourself some of the trouble.” He sipped on his drink. “Or save your boyfriend the trouble, at least.”

She crossed her arms and rested them on the table. “I’m not lying. Even when I was living out in San Antonio I never really had a boyfriend.” She saw the surprised look on Jax’s face and shook her head to emphasize her point. “I went on a couple dates with a couple guys but never…I don’t know,” she shrugged, “never really wanted to get to know anyone like that.”

“One less thing tryna pull you outta here, then,” he joked.

She laughed. “Of course.”

He leaned back in his chair. “What?”

She shook her head. “Nothing.” She sighed, propping her chin into the palm of her hand as she continued, diverting the conversation just slightly. “Besides, considering I seem to be blacklisted from most places, I might not have any other choice.”

Jax’s eyes popped wider in shock. “No way. C’mon, there’s no way you did anything that bad.” He paused, waiting for her to argue with him. “What’d you do? Knife somebody?”

She barked out a laugh, and it at least eased the tension. “No, I did not knife somebody. Jesus.”

“Then what was it?”

“Nothing.”

“You can’t tease me with that and then not follow through.”

She cocked one eyebrow at him. “I don’t think that you have the right to give anyone shit about teasing.”

“Fine. But if the feds come knockin’ on my door I might just rat you out.”

She smiled and took another sip of her drink. “I’ll take my chances.”

Natasha thought that that was going to be it, that it was going to be the thing that did them in and doomed them to a night of uncomfortable conversation. But Jax didn’t seem too offput by it. She figured that given the club and everything they got involved in, Jax was probably no stranger to secrets by this point. He picked another topic and they carried right on, but she could feel that there was a gravity that hadn’t been there before.

Jax squared up his tab and the two of them walked out together. He couldn’t help the grin on his face when he saw that Natasha had parked her bike right next to his. He never would’ve thought in a million years that she would be the one out of their group of friends to turn up on two wheels instead of four. Somehow it felt fitting.

“Back to Mom and Dad’s?” Jax asked as he leaned back against his bike.

Natasha laughed as she nodded, pulling on her gloves once more. “Well, I’m certainly not gonna sleep on the street. My childhood bedroom that’s packed full of boxes of shit from my apartment is still somehow preferable to that.”

He lit a cigarette, letting it casually hang from his lips as he asked, “Wanna come over to my place?” He saw the pointed look she gave him and held up his hands innocently, cigarette between his fingers. “Just for a drink.”

She was still shaking her head at him as she swung her leg over her bike. “You’ve had it too easy around here, Jackson.”

“Anytime you wanna stop by—”

His sentence was cut short by the sound of her bike engine, and even though they couldn’t hear each other over the noise of it, they both knew that the other was laughing. Once her bike quieted down, she said, “Night, Jax.”

He watched her roll back and get ready to jet off again. “Next round’s on you!”

She smiled before bringing her face shield down. “We’ll see.”

~*~

As one week turned into two, and Natasha was coming to grips with the fact that she had been back in Charming for an entire month and still had yet to make any headway on getting a job in-town, or hearing back from the places that she had applied to out of town, she realized that she was talking to Jax more than she was talking to most other people. Even if it wasn’t every day. The longer she stayed, the more familiar faces she saw. She didn’t know if she should feel comforted by the sameness of it all, by how many people were still there, by the fact that she was fading right back into things even though she’d been gone for so long.

Despite the calls and texts that they’d been exchanging, the casual comfort of having someone to talk to that wasn’t her parents, Natasha still found herself hesitating when he reached out and invited her over again. He hadn’t brought it up again since the night that they went to the bar. Held his tongue on it even when Natasha had stopped by T-M to see if they could give her bike an oil change.

“You’re tellin’ me that you don’t wanna get out of the house for a little while?” he joked when he heard her hesitation on the line. “Get out of the maze of cardboard boxes?”

Natasha laughed at that. She couldn’t deny the fact that it would be good to get out of the house. It didn’t feel suffocating the same way it had when she was a kid, but still she only wanted to stare at the same four walls for so long.

“Fine.” She could hear the smug victory in his voice before he even spoke, so she tried to catch him before he started. “But only because I don’t think I could survive sitting at the dinner table with you and my parents.”

Jax chuckled. “What’re you talking about? Moms love me.”

Natasha gave a playful scoff. “Yeah, that’s a whole separate problem.”

The sun was just starting to set when she pulled up to the house that night. She saw the lights on in the windows, and something about it felt so homey in contrast to the bike parked out front, in contrast to the man that she knew was living there now.

Walking up to the front door, she knocked and waited. She couldn’t hear anything coming from inside, no music or television. She was looking back over her shoulder when the door opened, revealing Jax in just his jeans and one of the seemingly countless Samcro shirts that he had. It briefly crossed Natasha’s mind that this was the first time since she’d been home that she saw him without his kutte on. He looked more like how she remembered him.

Jax’s house was about what Natasha had been expecting—a bachelor pad. Motorcycle posters and Harley paraphernalia scattered around and on the walls. She had the nagging feeling in the back of her mind that the matching, and fairly nice, furniture wasn’t picked out by Jax himself. That kind of thing had Gemma written all over it, but at least it meant that he didn’t have patio furniture in his living room and a mattress on the bedroom floor with no bed frame.

When they walked into the kitchen, Natasha saw the takeout containers on the table. There was only one place in town that had good Chinese takeout, and as far as she knew it was still the same family running it as it had been when she was a kid. Suddenly she realized how long ago lunch had been.

“Did me the kindness of not cooking for me, I see,” she joked as she stepped up to the table.

Jax chuckled as he opened the refrigerator. “Don’t say I never did anything for you.”

He handed her a beer before sitting down across the table from her with his own. Natasha watched him as he dug through the pile of silverware and sauce packets. She chuckled when he decided to forego the chopsticks and grabbed a fork instead.

The conversation started off with her asking if anything of note had happened at the shop. She’d been making it a point to not ask to much about the club—anything that she knew about any of it was because Jax had decided to tell her, not because she had pried it out of him. The question, though, was met with his usual rebuttal of, “You’d know what went down if you just let me hook you up with a job there.”

She shook her head as she deftly pulled noodles from the takeout box and placed them on her plate. “I told you, I’m not doing that. If I do that,” she shook her head, “then it’s like I’m committing to staying in Charming forever.”

Jax chuckled as she handed the box over to him. “And that’s the worst thing in the world?”

“Not the worst. I just, I don’t know, I loved being out in San Antonio I guess. It was great until it wasn’t.”

“Yeah, what happened with that anyway?” He took a bite of his rice. “You never told me.”

She shook her head. “Never told anyone, really.”

“So?” he asked, food tucked in his cheek. “What’s the deal?”

She sighed, slumping back in her chair. “Do we have to get into this right now?”

“What? Come on, you’ve been all mysterious about it—can’t expect me not to ask.”

“Can I at least eat my dinner in peace?”

Jax let slip a smirk as he nodded. The two of them shifted to silence for a couple minutes as they started to eat. He met her halfway at least, telling her about the antics that Tig and Juice had gotten into at T-M that day.

The two of them made it through dinner without it coming up again. Jax had started to accept the fact that she wasn’t going to tell him. He was ready to accept the fact that she wasn’t ever going to tell him. They were cleaning up, tossing the empty takeout boxes in the garbage and putting the plates in the dishwasher. It was only when she let the lid drop closed on the garbage can that she spoke up about the topic that she’d been dodging with Jax, with everyone since she came home.

“I got blacklisted out in San Antonio.”

He was placing the last plate in the dishwasher when she said it. Turning to face her, he raised his eyebrows. “Yeah?”

“After they fired me,” she explained as she went to the fridge to grab another beer, “they pretty much put a notice out to everywhere I tried to go to next telling them not to take me on.”

“Shit,” he said, closing the dishwasher. “What the hell did you do?”

“Depends on who you ask. You ask my old boss and he’ll say that I assaulted a coworker.”

He came and stood, leaning back against the counter right next to where she was standing. “And if I ask you?”

“I’d say that I popped some guy in the jaw because he tried to put his hands on me after I told him to back off.”

Jax’s eyes widened, not expecting that to be what she said. “Jesus Christ.”

She shook her head, a bitter expression on her face as she took another sip of her beer. “Yeah. We worked on the same crew for almost two years. Thought we were friends, but…” she shrugged, knowing there was nothing to do about it now.

“You tell your boss what—”

“You know how tough it was to even get that job in the first place? The shit I had to go through there when I got hired? When I was in school?” She scoffed. “Yeah, I told him. But it’s a boy’s club over there—I never stood a chance.”

“Who was he?”

She chuckled, looking over at him. “Why? You gonna ride across state lines to beat the shit out of him?”

He allowed himself a small smile. “I would if you wanted me to.”

The laugh she let out had a little bit of heaviness lurking beneath it. “Jax Teller, ever the gentleman.”

He smirked. “Last man keeping chivalry alive.”

When the silence crept back in, it was the first time that Jax really felt how much older they both were now. Charming sometimes had a bit of a Neverland quality to it—even when people grew up it didn’t really feel like they did. But hearing what had happened, seeing the look on her face, suddenly he felt the years that had passed.

Natasha saw him trying to think of something else to say so she decided to save him the trouble. “So that’s why I’m home.” She chuckled awkwardly, crossing her arms over her chest. “It’s also why I haven’t told anyone the real reasons why I’m home.”

“Not even your parents?”

She shook her head. “What’re they gonna do about it? Besides feel bad? Or,” she laughed weakly, “or lock me up in my room at home?”

Jax relaxed against the counter, a move that caused his side to be pressing up against hers. He knew that she had a point, that even if she gave her parents all the details of what had happened to her, it wasn’t going to change the outcome. He also remembered, way back when, that her parents hadn’t wanted her to leave. They said it was a big scary world out there and they didn’t want her getting lost in it—Natasha didn’t want to let them think that they were right.

She saw the way that his face was shifting, and not for the first or last time she wished that she could read his mind. Trying to ease the tension, she took another sip of her beer and nudged his shoulder with hers. “You look like you’re thinking way too hard over there.”

“You really don’t wanna stay?”

She shrugged, what little humor was in her face fading as she answered. “There’s no way to stay here and do what I want to do. And, even with everything,” she turned and placed her empty beer bottle on the counter behind them, “that happened, I don’t think I want to give it up.”

“No?”

“The work wasn’t the issue. And, shit, I’m good at my job. I just need to find somewhere with people who aren’t total scumbags.” She raked her hands back through her hair. “And that seems to be a tall order.”

“You really wouldn’t want to do anything different? I’m sure you could—”

“Why?”

Jax’s brows knit together, confusion all over his face at her interruption. “What do you mean?”

Natasha took a small step away from him, turning so that they were facing each other head-on. “Why do you want me to stay so bad? You didn’t care when I left before.” She’d thought it plenty of times before, but that was the first time she’d ever said the words out loud and all the emotions she felt all those years ago came back with a vengeance.

“You don’t know that.”

She laughed, but it was a sad sound. “I think I do. You hardly noticed when I was there, let alone when I was gone.”

He reached out, trying to catch her hand with his own. “Nat, c’mon, I—”

“No.” She yanked her hand away and started to turn to leave, not ready or willing to deal with the feelings that had been lying dormant for so long. “You don’t get to do this to me again.”

Jax quickly caught up to her. His hand landed on her shoulder, pulling and making her turn around to face him. “Hey! Hold on. What the hell are you talking about?”

She shook her head, not forcing herself to make eye contact with him. “Nothing. Just forget it.”

“No. You don’t get to say something like that to me and then just storm out.” He allowed her to shrug off his grasp. “Tell me what’s going on.”

Natasha was silent for a moment. She was staring intently at Jax, eyes flicking back and forth between his as she tried to figure out how little he knew, how honest he was being. She found it so hard to believe that he never knew how she felt, but looking at the confusion, the hurt on his face, for a moment she wasn’t quite so sure.

“You really don’t know? You’re really going to make me say it?”

“Say what?”

“That I spent almost all of high school in love with you!” She shook her head, raking her nails back along her scalp. “Jesus Christ, Jax. I know you were a little preoccupied but you can’t really expect me to believe that you never—”

“I didn’t. I didn’t know.”

She scoffed, wishing that the soft, sad look in his eyes would go away. “Not like it would’ve mattered anyway.”

Out of instinct Jax reached out for her. “Natty—”

She took another step back before he could get to her. Ignoring the tears in her eyes she started to all but book it towards the door. “I gotta go.”

Jax wanted to go after her but he knew that it wouldn’t do any good. After a couple seconds he heard the sound of his front door slamming shut, the sound making him flinch. He shut his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose for a moment as he tried to work his way through what had just happened.

Natasha just tried to focus on the sound of her motorcycle’s engine and the road stretching out in front of her. She tried not to think about the tears on her cheeks or the way that her heart was beating rapidly in her chest. Or the look on Jax’s face when he heard what she’d said to him. She went a little faster, the roar of her bike getting a little louder to drown it all out as she took the long way home.

~*~

All of Jax’s calls had been going to voicemail after that. He texted her only to get no response. Every now and then he’d hear her bike or see her whipping down main street. She hadn’t stopped by the shop in the week since she stormed out of his house.

There had been part of him that wanted to stop by her parents’ house but with what little impulse control he had, he knew that it wasn’t going to do him any favors. He didn’t want to corner her—all he wanted to do was talk.

Underneath the embarrassment and hurt that was aching in Natasha’s chest, the sense of restlessness that she’d felt since she came home had increased ten-fold. The only upside, not that she was sure if she’d call it that just yet, was that in her moment of crisis she had sent out a whole other wave of applications to places out of the county, out of the state. That didn’t mean that there was any guarantee that any of those places were going to call her back, but the indecision between staying home and taking off again disappeared. Or, at least, it had until her emotions slowly started to settle, but by then the damage was already done.

It had been just shy of a week when she rolled back into Jax’s driveway. She hadn’t even listened to any of the voicemails that he’d left for her. She saw the texts but still hadn’t responded. She hadn’t even bothered to reach out and let him know that she had decided to stop by. The way she saw it, the worst-case scenario was that he’d just send her away.

He was opening the front door before she even had the chance to knock. He didn’t bother trying to hide his surprise at her sudden appearance on his front steps. The feeling was mutual as Natasha stood there staring at him in nothing but his jeans, hair still wet from the shower as he clutched what appeared to be a t-shirt in his hand. There was a moment of tense silence, neither of them really up for forcing an awkward greeting as they stood in the doorway. Without a word, Jax opened the door a little wider for her and she stepped inside.

He led the way, pulling the t-shirt on as he did, and Natasha tried to lie to herself about how intently she watched that happen. She was the one who broke the silence when they reached the kitchen. “Sorry to just drop in.”

He shook his head as he turned back around to face her. “No you’re not.” There was no malice in his voice, but there wasn’t humor either. Both of them still testing the waters.

She hummed quietly in response. “I just, um, about last time. I—”

“It’s fine.”

“No it wasn’t.” She shook her head as she stared down at the floor. “It was shitty to just throw that in your face. It was a lifetime ago at this point and I just…” she trailed off, not sure where she wanted the sentence to go. She hadn’t rehearsed ahead of time and she was kicking herself for it.

“You meant it though?”

She huffed, not wanting to look him in the eyes. “Well, yeah, but what good does it do anyone now?”

“Is it still true?”

She raised her eyebrows. “What?”

“What you said last time, do you still—”

“Come on,” she said, trying to ignore the heat flaring up in her face. “I don’t even know you anymore.”

He cracked a small smile. “Sure you do.”

“Jax,” she tried to say his name like it was a warning, but it didn’t hit quite right with the tremor to it.

He stepped in closer to her, enough so that she had to tilt her chin up just a touch to be able to look him in the eyes. “I haven’t changed that much,” he paused and studied her expression, “and I don’t think you have either.”

The responsible part of her brain was telling her to stop all of this before it even got a chance to get started, that nothing good could possibly come from getting mixed up in all of this now. The sentimental part of her, though, the part of her that still felt her knees getting weak whenever she looked into his bright blue eyes that were so focused on her in that moment, was telling her that she had spent so many years daydreaming of something like this happening that it would be silly to turn her back on it now that it was actually unfolding.

She pulled in a breath, gearing up to say words that she hadn’t even thought of yet, but it wasn’t as though Jax even gave her a chance. Leaning in, he caught her lips in a kiss that was softer than Natasha thought he was capable of being. Everything about it caught her off-guard, so much so that she only got herself to kiss him back when his palm cupped her cheek, the warmth of the gesture kicking her brain into gear.

Placing her palms flat against his chest, for a moment she thought about pushing him away, ending whatever it was that the moment was trying to be. She almost did it, too, but instead she found herself sliding her hands up until they were on his shoulders, the ends of his hair grazing over her knuckles.

Jax placed his other hand on the small of her back, pulling her in closer when he felt the way she was kissing him back so eagerly, threading her fingers into his hair. Even as the warmth of Jax’s palm was seeping through her shirt and into her skin, Natasha still was waiting for it to all be a daydream, a sick joke that the universe was playing on her. It wasn’t the wisest thing that she’d done since she got home but she figured she might as well enjoy it while she could.

Without a second thought, Jax placed his hands on the backs of her thighs and lifted her up to set her on the table. Out of instinct, Natasha wrapped her legs around his waist and kept him pinned tight to her. She felt the smirk on his face as he kissed her and it felt as good as she’d always daydreamed about—if anything it felt better than that.

She didn’t pull away until she felt Jax’s hands slide down her sides and start to creep up underneath the fabric of the t-shirt that she was wearing. “Jax,” her voice was quiet, breathless, “I don’t…I don’t think this is a good idea.”

He chuckled, pressing a kiss to her cheek, then another to her jaw. “Never said it was a good idea.”

Her logic and resolve were deteriorating rapidly when he began to kiss down the column of her neck. She tilted her head back, allowing him better access as her eyes fluttered shut. With what few coherent thoughts were in her head, she managed to say, “We—I can’t.” She pushed him away a little farther, enough so that his lips against her skin were no longer making her thoughts go awry.

There was still a smile on his face and Natasha briefly wondered if it would ever go away at this point. He reached forward, pushing her hair behind her shoulder as he spoke. “Why not?”

She shook her head, trying not to focus on the way his fingers were trailing up and down her arm. “I’m…I’m not staying. In Charming. I applied to a bunch of places and if one of them calls me back…” she hesitated for a moment, “I’m going.”

That got his grin to falter but it only took a moment for him to recover. “So we can’t make the most of it while you’re here?”

She scoffed but it wasn’t cruel. “I don’t,” she uncurled her legs from around his waist, “I don’t want to just…” She forced herself to look him in the eyes. “All this and then I leave?”

“So stay,” he offered, tone purposely casual.

She chuckled, hands on his shoulders. “Or you leave with me.”

He shook his head. “You’re over-thinking this.” He leaned in and kissed her again, noticing the way that her fingers wound themselves into his t-shirt as he did. “We can have a good time while you’re here. Being home doesn’t have to be so bad.”

“Jax.”

“Natty.”

She laughed and he took advantage of the moment as an opportunity to kiss her again. She gave right back into it, arms draping over Jax’s shoulders as her heels pressed into the backs of his thighs to get him closer to her again. The moan building in the base of her throat as Jax’s tongue slid to meet hers was involuntary. If she could’ve just melted completely into him in that moment, she would have.

Jax’s wandering hands finally came to rest on her waist. She could feel the pressure of his fingertips as he squeezed her tight. Something about the urgency, the need of it, had butterflies erupting in Natasha’s stomach all over again. To feel that wanted by someone she’d spent so much time wanting was its own unique type of high.

When he started to work the button on her jeans, Natasha pulled away again. “Wait.” Natasha hardly recognized her own voice with how out of breath she sounded.

Jax’s brows knit together. “What’s wrong?”

She shook her head. “Nothing. Nothing I just don’t do…this.”

He cracked a grin. “Not like I’m gonna tell on you.”

She gave a small, almost weak, smile. “No, no. I mean I don’t…I’ve never…”

It wasn’t until Jax noticed the way that she couldn’t meet his eyes that he realized what she was saying to him. He didn’t want to just let her run off again, but he also didn’t want to make her feel like she couldn’t leave.

Taking his hand away from the waistband of her jeans, he cupped her chin instead and tilted her head so that she was looking at him. He knew that he didn’t have the right things to say, so instead he kissed her again, soft and calculated. Allowing her to give in or pull away one more time.

“You can stay here tonight even if you’re not staying in Charming forever, you know,” he said, lips so close that they were brushing against hers as he spoke.

He felt the breath she pulled in as she thought about what he was saying, offering to her. The small handful of seconds that passed by felt like they dragged on for an eternity. Jax could feel the tension in her muscles, building up like they were getting ready to snap.

She only relaxed again when she crashed her lips back into his. Jax didn’t hesitate as he wrapped his arms around her, kissing her back just as eagerly. Reaching up, Jax grabbed her hands and interlocked their fingers before pulling away. He only let the space linger long enough to pull her back down off the table. Then he was bringing her body right flush to his again, kissing her as he guided her back through the house towards the bedroom.

Natasha was lying on her back on the mattress, stripped down to just her t-shirt and underwear. Jax hovered over her, pulling her legs so that they were draped around his waist. He still had his jeans on but his t-shirt was lost in the pile with the rest of Natasha’s clothes. He ran his hand up her thigh and over her hip, fingers tracing along the exposed skin there as he kissed her.

He felt the involuntary shiver when he hooked his fingers into the waistband of her panties. He pulled back, studying her face. “We can stop, you know.”

Natasha swallowed hard as she nodded. “I know. I don’t,” she reached and dragged her fingertips down the side of his face, the stubble trying to take away some of the boyishness and failing, “I don’t want you to stop.”

He smiled wide, kissing her once more on the lips before leaving a trail of kisses down over the t-shirt covering her chest, the exposed skin of her stomach, and then down to her hips and thighs as he pulled her underwear down and off her legs, casting them aside with everything else.

Jax let her legs hang over his shoulders, granting him the ability to kiss and nip at the insides of her thighs with ease. With every move and breath he could feel what it did to her, the way she squirmed with excitement, thighs tensing as he dragged his lips and tongue along her skin. He hovered over her core, waiting for her to look at him and give him some cue to keep going before he allowed himself to lick a stripe through her folds. The way she gasped and arched into him had him smirking against her as he continued to work her over with his lips and tongues, allowing himself to get lost in the way that she tasted, the sounds she made in response to everything that he did.

Her thighs were trembling on either side of his head when he pulled his lips off of her center. Her body was already pliant underneath him as he kissed his way back up her torso. He kissed her, running his tongue along hers so that she could taste herself the way that he did. She was gripping onto his shoulders, pulling him closer when she felt his fingers trailing up the inside of her thigh, touch featherlight over her wet and sensitive folds. He was slow, gentle as he pushed his fingers into her. her breathing was ragged, needy as she adjusted to what he’d given her. Once she was kissing him again, Jax began to carefully and methodically pump his fingers in and out of her, her moans and the way that she panted his name were like music to his ears.

“Jax, please,” she begged in pants. “Please.”

He felt the way she was working the button and zipper on his jeans, fumbling slightly as he reached over to his nightstand. Pulling the drawer open, he reached around blindly until he found a condom. Quicker than she even realized, Jax’s jeans and boxers were tossed to the floor and he was lined up at her entrance.

It was taking every ounce of self-control to not thrust into her. Leaning down, he kissed her again, murmuring soft reassurances in her ear that had her trying to pull him closer and into her. He kissed her right below her ear. “I’ve got you.”

She sucked in a sharp breath, nails biting into his shoulders as he pushed into her. He went slow, telling her how good she was doing and how amazing she felt around him, words that rendered her unable to do anything but whimper in response.

“You okay?” he asked as he kneaded the muscles of her thigh. When she didn’t say anything in response, he gave her leg a squeeze. “Nat? You okay?”

She had a blissful, hazy look in her eyes as she nodded. “I’m okay. Please, Jax.”

As he started to thrust into her, there was a moment when he wasn’t sure who was having a harder time controlling themselves. Her legs locked tight around his waist, nails dragging hungrily down his back as he started to find his rhythm, started to speed up his pace. She begged him to keep going like he’d ever dream of stopping.

He felt her breath against his skin, her lips on his neck and shoulder as he braced his arms on either side of her head. He pulled away enough to be able to look down at her, and the hunger in her eyes as her hands slid down his chest was a sight Jax didn’t think he was ever going to be able to forget. She fit him so perfectly, and when he felt the way she pulled at his hair while he kissed her his mind went blank.

She bit lightly at his lip, her legs trembling against him. Her words faded into moans as her walls fluttered around him. She took his chin in her hand, fingertips pressing into his jaw. He pressed his forehead to hers, both their eyes shutting tight as they soaked up the feel of the other.

“Don’t stop,” she plead desperately, wanting anything that would prolong the feeling of him inside her, the waves of pleasure that rolled over her each time he slowly dragged himself out only to thrust back into her again.

Jax wanted to give her anything and everything she could ask for. She looked so dazed and sounded so needy—he couldn’t remember the last time he felt so entranced by someone. He thrust into her, slow but deep. It was only when he was buried as deep inside her as he could manage that he spoke up, his breath warm against the shell of her ear.

“Don’t know how much longer I can last when you feel this good.”

The laugh she let out was a breathless one, but it was music to Jax’s ears nonetheless. He kissed the side of her throat, starting to suck a dark mark to leave behind when he felt himself getting close to the edge. With his lips on her neck he slipped one hand up underneath her shirt, kneading her breast as he continued to thrust into her. Moments later he could feel it, the way that she was coming undone around him. His name fell from her lips somewhere between a whine and a moan, a perfect sound that had Jax unraveling right after her, pushing into her with one more harsh thrust as he spilled into the condom and collapsed against her chest.

He listened to the rapid beat of her heart for a moment before lifting his head so that he could look at her. She was already staring at him, and there was something about the blissful smile on her face that had a sense of ease washing over Jax.

Still, he kissed her softly on the lips and ask, “You okay?”

She smiled, nodding and pulling him in for another kiss. “I’m good.”

They laid like that, neither of them looking to pull away from the other. Natasha was expecting to feel exposed, the way that he was looking at her, the way his fingers trailed along her face and through her hair. But it was comfortable, like they’d been doing this forever.

Too soon for either of their liking, Jax slowly pulled out of her. He swiped his boxers off the floor to he could clean himself up, handing Natasha’s back to her as well. By the time that he came back into the bedroom she was under the covers and in one of his shirts instead of her own. He couldn’t lie and say that he didn’t enjoy the sight of it.

“Comfy?” he joked as he slid into bed beside her.

“I’d say so.” She moved closer, resting her head on his chest as she draped her across him.

He pulled her one leg over so that it was tangled with his. “So…you’re gonna stay, right?”

“Jackson.”

He laughed, squeezing her tight for a moment. “Tonight, I mean.”

She hummed in amusement. “Mhm, I’m sure.” She tilted her head so that she was looking at him. “Yes, I’m gonna stay the night.”

He gave that same smirk he always did. “Still can’t call you darlin’ though, right?”

She shook her head. “No you can’t.” She rested her head back against his chest again, letting her eyes shut as she listened to the thrum of his heartbeat. “Natty works just fine.”

He chuckled, lips brushing against the edge of her forehead in a quick kiss. He felt her relaxing more and more against him as exhaustion started to settle in. Despite what the morning held, or the next few weeks, they at least had this. He ran his hand up and down her back. “I’ll take it.”

(divider by @cyberangel-graphics 💖)

SOA Taglist: @withmyteeth @garbinge @littlekittymeow @yourwinchesterbros @i-just-read-stuff

@justreblogginfics @paintballkid711 @jitterbugs927 @fanfic-n-tabulous @beardburnsupersoldiers

@darqchilddaydreamz @choochoo284 @artemiseamoon @nessamc @narcolini

[philokaliist]

Can you do a Clarisse x reader fic where reader snaps at Luke after he calls Clarisse the lightning thief pls? 😇 Fem reader also.

'Thunderstruck'

Clarisse La Rue x Fem!Reader

A/N:Hii!Ty for requesting,lovely!I tried but it turned out rather short.But still I hope you like it!Also sorry for beint inactive I had a ton of tests.Probs gonna post more this weekend then be ia for weeks again(hopefully not)

You snap at Luke after he accuses Clarisse of being the thief,and he reveals his true nature.But unknown to you-Clarisse saw it all.

Among campers,accusations of the lightning thief circulated,asting suspicion on Clarisse La Rue-the one who 'had a motive to do it' as luke claimed.Anger swelled within you as Luke pointed fingers at her.It ended with you and him arguing in his cabin "You've got to be bullshitting!You think Clarisse is the lightning thief?" you snapped, eyes burning with frustration. "You're out of your goddamned mind,Castellan!"

Luke's eyes narrowed, his gaze gleaming with a sinister edge. "Watch your tongue.You might not want to make enemies with the wrong people," he warned, a dark undercurrent in his voice.

But you weren't one to back down. "I don't give a single fuck who believes you! Clarisse is not the thief, and you know it,you fucking liar!" The words flew from your mouth like arrows, fueled by a mix of anger and frustration.

But unbeknownst to you, Clarisse observed the heated exchange from the shadows. She saw you defending her honor, even when she wasn't present. Something stirred within her, a warmth that surpassed camaraderie.

As the argument escalated in Luke's empty cabin, his true nature unveiled itself. The revelation sent a shiver down your spine. "You're working with Kronos, aren't you?" you accused, your voice trembling with a mixture of fear and anger.

Luke's malevolence was palpable as he threatened you, his true colors unfurling like a dark banner. Refusing to be intimidated, you clenched your fists and, without a second thought, delivered a resounding punch to his face.

In the aftermath, as the echo of your punch lingered, Luke's cruel grip on your chin startled you. "Keep your mouth shut," he hissed, leaving you with a sense of vulnerability and shock.

Leaving Luke's cabin, you sought solace by the lake. The water's gentle ripples mirrored the storm within you as the storm outside continued to brew.Unbeknownst to you, Clarisse had followed,silently watching as you grappled with the turmoil of emotions.Sensing your frustration, she approached and sat next to you.

The clouds overhead darkened, and a distant rumble of thunder echoed through the air. Raindrops started to fall, gradually turning into a torrential downpour. With the rain cascading around you, you and Clarisse found yourselves drenched in water.

"Hey," she said gruffly,not even paying attention to the rain,but earning your attention,a flicker of surprise crossing your features as you looked at her. "Thanks for standing up for me back there.Means more than you know."

You managed a small smile,still surprised but as you were about to speak,but before you could utter a word, Clarisse pulled you in,by your shirt as she silenced you with a sudden but equally passionate kiss. It caught you off guard, but the intensity of the moment overwhelmed any protest that might have crossed your mind.

Clarisse released you, her gaze locking onto yours. "Don't need your words right now,just your presence,pretty girl." she asserted.Though,seemingly aware of your shock-and enjoying it,she gave a smirk and spoke again, "Don't ruin the moment with words.Just enjoy it."

As the rain intensified,the world around you blurred into a watery haze.The raindrops, echoing the heartbeat of the moment. In the midst of the storm, your lips met again, a mix of passion and a tinge of vulnerability.

A/N:I'd punch and kiss Luke at the same time but how dare u accuse my girl like that 😭

[b0nten]

BLUEBELLS, YOURS TRULY.

[SYNOPSIS] ˚⁀➷｡ albeit rarely, rindou overthinks, and frequently, ran doesn’t think too much.

[NOTES] ˚⁀➷｡ this is like the “backstory” for the ring. MAYBE i’ll turn it into a multiple part. i also put it in the timeline where everyone is happy because i really love everyone being friends. wrote it because rays’s version destroyed me !!!!!!!!!!!

he spins the ring on his finger. he slides it off. he looks at it. he lets it hang from his neck, on the chain. he sighs.

“now what the hell is up with you?” barging in, ran asks. “who shat in your cereal every morning for the past two weeks?” he says, opening the kitchen cupboard to take — funny enough — some cereal out.

“i’m not in the mood, ran.” his younger brother spits back, head falling against the wooden table.

“hey now, there’s something really wrong with you if you’re acting like .. this.” pointing at him, he sits down, fat bowl of cereal clashing against the dark block, spilling some milk onto it. “now, spill.” with mouth full, he tries to choke out the words, spoon in his brothers face the moment he gulps down the first mouthful.

“you’re gross sometimes.” rindou just sighs, looking away.

“what’s with the ring?” ignoring the insult, the lanky haitani just continues his questioning. “by the way, the blue doesn’t look that bad on you.”

“it’s mine, and i got a matching one for y/n.” the other explains, “thanks, by the way. it was her idea to dye it like this.”

“you wanna propose to her?” his older brother asks, chewing loudly. “y’know we’re still just teenagers?”

“no shit, big head.” rolling his eyes, rindou feels the exasperation dig its roots deeper into his brain. “i’m not proposing. yet. but i don’t know if i should give it to her.” he finally says, letting ran in on his worries.

“and why not? what’s that? cartier, right?”

“no brand can escape your gaze, you’re really unbelievable.”

“thanks, bro, love you too.” as he swallows his last spoonful, ran winks.

“not in a good way.” the younger sibling announces, earning a displeased look from his brother.

“now you’re the annoying one. fuck’s going with you two?” ran finally snaps, trying not look worried. after all, he loves his brother, but they don’t do that kind of talking.

“she’s leaving next week” rindou finally manages to choke out.

“what? what do you mean?” his brother asks, taken aback by the sudden information.

“her student visa’s expired. she’s gotta go back home until gets it renewed.”

it pains him to even think about it. he hasn’t eaten in almost fourteen days, ever since he found out. but what pains him even more is how excited you are about going back home. about going away from him.

he thinks it’s selfish, because he knows how much you’ve missed your parents and how much you’ve waited for a holiday that’s long enough to return.

“if the flights take four days in total and i want to stay for two weeks, then i’d rather not go anymore.” you always said. “i want to spend as much time as possible, without having to rush anything, y’know?

but maybe sometimes love is all about being selfish, loving someone with your whole heart. maybe he wants to never let you leave without him. maybe he can’t let you leave without him because he can’t stand not being an 8 minute subway ride away from you.

“don’t tell me you got some of those control issues, the pretty tiktok girls say they’re not cute at all…” ran comments, dodging an uppercut by a mere second.

“can you take me seriously for once? i think she wants to break up with me, she called me over today saying we have to talk.” rin frowns, blond-blue bangs covering his tired eyes. “i shouldn’t have believed that tiktok reading that said good news are coming my way.”

“you’re so fucking dumb, lord have mercy.”

“excuse me, ran?”

“you’re excused. let’s get this straight: does it really matter to you wether she’s oceans away or in meguro? what do you think she’s gonna do, break up with you only to return in three months and see you everywhere? do you really think y/n’s that kind of girlfriend? throw away three years BECAUSE OF A VISA?! fuck outta here with that insecure crap, rin. i raised you better than that.”

on the inside, ran smiles. oh, how he loves knocking sense into his younger brother. truly the best activity.

“now go and talk to her.”

rindou hesitates.

“i won’t say it nicely the second time around.” the older one threatens, and rindou jolts up from his chair and bolts through the door, house slippers still on, door wide open. before ran can say anything else, rindou’s voice echoes from the staircase into the kitchen:

“i’ll buy a new pair when i get back, don’t start bitching, please! i’ve got a girl i have to convince not to break up with me!”

his older brother laughs as he pulls out his phone.

sister in law

(16:22) he’s on his way.

then, a ping fills the empty space.

sister in law

(16:23) already talked to mikey. everything’s going great.

(16:23) love you, big head

(16:23)🫰

maybe ran’s not gonna tell you the reason rindou is running like a maniac through minato ward right now.

ugh, is his head really that big?

tagging: @h4nman BECAUSE YOU MADE ME CRY😡😡😡 ; @sirachano0dles <3 i might start a taglist if i make this into a multiple part fic?!?

[visceravalentines]

the driver

it turns out I am chewing on them every moment of every day. I'm sure this fic will permanently satisfy the hunger of course ✨🌷🙃

2.3k words. character study happy ending post-credits type beat where everyone lives and drives off into the sunset together. pre-slash but Randy is so down bad he doesn't know how to cope. nobody do the math on mileage or drive time I made it all up Minnesota isn't even real

They’re about 50 miles over the Missouri border when Benson asks him. 

“You think you could drive, man?” 

Randy looks at him sharply, not sure he heard him right. He must not have heard him right. 

Benson glances over and his eyes are bloodshot beyond belief, the skin beneath them dark and hollow. His crow’s feet have multiplied. “I gotta sleep, Randy, or we’re gonna end up in a ditch.” 

After a beat of careful consideration, Randy nods. “Yeah. Yeah, I could–I can drive.” 

The car lurches to the right as Benson pulls over immediately, puts it in park and slumps in his seat. His head falls back against the headrest and he digs the heels of his hands into his eyes. “Fuck.” 

Randy watches him with an intent he can feel but can’t parse, hasn’t been able to parse all day and the night before and the day before that. He stopped being scared, really scared, a while ago. Fear still gnaws at the edges of him, jittery and mean like rats in the walls, but it’s not the same.

He’s no longer afraid Benson might kill him. He’s afraid he might decide he doesn’t need him anymore. And those are different things. 

Benson’s big hands drop into his lap. He stares blankly through the windshield at the half-set sun, exhausted.

Randy has the urge to touch him. To clap a hand on his shoulder, give it a little shake. He plays it out in his head. Yeah, man. I’ll drive for a while. Don’t worry about it. Get some rest.

His hands stay clasped between his thighs. 

“Don’t really know where we’re goin’, so I guess you can just pick a direction,” Benson says. “Anywhere but back that way.” He shoots Randy a pointed look, but the point is dull and bleary. 

Randy nods. “North. I got it.” You can trust me. I know that sounds like bullshit, but it’s not.

Benson pours out of the car like his bones are dissolving. He stretches mightily, arches his back and groans loudly, and Randy flinches and doesn’t know why. 

He gets out and the breeze hits his face, smells a little like home and a little bit different. He gazes down the highway, tracks it all the way to where it disappears beyond a sun-washed hill. He’s never been this far north before, never been out of Louisiana except for a family reunion in Florida one time. 

He wonders, for a second, if maybe they could see them all. All fifty states. Benson’s car might not make it that many miles. But it would be something. It would be cool. 

“You sure you’re good?” 

Randy turns, squints into the sun. Benson is lit from behind, face in shadow, but Randy can feel his eyes, the way they probe like fingers at his mouth, his neck. 

“I’m good.” 

Benson taps his fist against the roof of the car. “Super.” 

They trade sides, cross paths in front of the bumper. Randy slides into the seat and it’s still warm from Benson’s body. He feels like he's sitting in his shadow. He's been wearing his shirt for two days now, the smell of stale cigarette smoke working itself into his skin. It's like he's being assimilated, wrapped in a cocoon of brash words and an army green jacket. He presses his spine against the backrest and folds his arms around himself without thinking about it. 

Benson yanks open the door and snaps him out of it. He sits forward and feels under the seat for the lever to slide it up a few inches, touches something sticky, makes a face. Benson’s got longer legs than he does, even though they're about the same height. Benson is big in Randy's mind. Or maybe Randy is small. Does Benson think he's small?

Like he can read his mind, or thinks he can, Benson shoves his seat way back. “Jesus, Randy, you’re allowed to take up space,” he mutters as he pushes the backrest almost horizontal. 

No one’s ever told him that before. Does Benson know no one’s told him that before? 

“Don’t wreck my fucking car.” 

“I won’t.” 

“And don’t get pulled over.” 

“I won’t.” 

Benson nods once like a punctuation mark. “Good boy.” 

Randy exhales heavily. 

He buckles up, hesitates as he sets his hands on the wheel. Ten and two. He slides them together to meet at twelve, where Benson always grips the wheel with half a hand, pointing at things, eyes anywhere but the road, talking with his whole body. Then he slides them back to ten and two, at least for now. One thing at a time.

He signals before he pulls back onto the road even though there’s not another car in sight. He presses the gas gently, like he’s wiping a smudge off someone’s cheek. And just like that, they're back on their way.

Benson’s car is old as shit and runs like it’s doing him a favor. It takes Randy a minute to get used to it, the resistance of the pedals and the way the wheel is about as sensitive as the bottom of a work boot. He’s careful with it, not because it’s old or unreliable, but because it’s his. Because he’s trusting him with it. 

He’s the driver now. 

Benson moves in his periphery, fast and sudden like he does, and without meaning to Randy jerks, jerks the wheel. Benson gives him a look, reaching around for something in the backseat. “Sorry,” Randy mumbles. 

“Just be cool,” Benson says with his jacket in his hands. He balls it up to use as a pillow, shifts around, settles in and shuts his eyes. 

Be cool, Randy repeats to himself. Be cool, be cool. 

“Are you…going to buckle your seatbelt?” he asks. He’s been waiting to ask. Now seems like the last opportune moment. 

Benson opens his eyes and looks at him like he’s grown a second head. “What are you, a fuckin’ cop?” 

Randy feels his face flush. He looks away. “Sorry. Do whatever you want.” 

“You know if you slam on the brakes and I’m layin’ down like this I’m goin’ through the windshield, seatbelt or no.” 

“Do whatever you want,” Randy says again. “I’m just…trying to be safe.” 

Benson grabs the seatbelt, yanks it across his chest, clicks it into place with attitude. “Happy?” 

Randy glances at him and away, almost smiles in spite of himself. Yeah. “Yeah.” For once, he thinks he might really mean it. 

Benson grumbles and closes his eyes. He fidgets for a while, bullies the jacket into a different shape, but soon he falls still and quiet. Randy figures he has nothing left in the tank after the events of the last thirty-six hours, nothing more to give to Randy or anybody else.

He drives like the backseat is full of fine china, nice and easy, until Benson starts to snore. It's a cute snore, kind of nasally and pitched higher than his voice. He slams the door on that thought the moment it arrives, shoos it away and casts a guilty look over at Benson.

He’s never seen him look so at peace. There's a tension missing from his face, a furrow between his brows that Randy only registers in its absence. He wonders if he has nightmares like Randy has nightmares. Probably. Probably worse. But there’s no sign of them now; he’s too wiped out. 

Now that he’s not waving a gun around and yelling, he resembles the old Benson. The guy who greeted him at the start of each shift with a casual wave and nothing to say. The man who moved like he was in a dream, seemed checked out completely until you caught his eye and realized he hadn't missed a second of what was going on around him. Not even the little things. Not even Randy.

As the miles wear on, he wonders which Benson is more real, the quiet one or the loud one. Maybe they’re two sides of the same coin. Maybe everyone has someone else inside of them, raw and bright, harder to swallow. Randy always figured he was the only one slumming around with that particular burden–the monster of his guilt, his anger, feelings too big to unbottle lest they rip him in half–but maybe he was wrong. He's been wrong a lot the last couple days. 

It doesn’t probably matter which is more real because he likes them both:  the Benson who once followed him out the back door under the guise of a smoke break to make sure he was okay after a particularly egregious run-in with Chris, and the Benson who beat the shit out of his own personal boogeyman in the parking lot of an elementary school until his hands bled. Randy understands both of them. Feels a connection to both of them. Knows he can count on both of them when it matters. 

Randy leans back and feels it then, feels it all, the world shrinking behind them, the past pinned to it like a poster on a corkboard, the dying sun to his left and the man on his right and Benson’s fingerprints worn into the leather of the steering wheel. And it's exhilarating, it's amazing. It's freedom and possibility. Hope, even.

And he desperately, deep in his bones, wants to be someone Benson can count on. When it matters or doesn't. He knows he isn’t a fighter or a talker, but he cares. He cares so fucking much sometimes he wants to bite through his own tongue. Maybe that could be worth something. For the first time, sitting in the driver's seat on the run from the law, he thinks maybe that might be enough. He might be enough. 

He has Benson to thank for that, too.

He hasn't felt like this since he was a kid. Maybe ever. Light. Free. The way the highway unfolds in front of him forever makes him feel like maybe he could fly. He kind of wishes it would rain and he can't say why. Only that he wants the air to smell like wet asphalt, like dirt. 

And he wants to thank Benson. He doesn’t think he can, like, he can’t just say it. Thanks for killing all those people. It really opened my eyes. Thanks for scaring me shitless, I needed that. No way. He’s gotta be cool. Find some other way.

He reads the names of towns he’s never heard of on the highway sign. They’ll have to stop somewhere eventually, right? Get a motel room or something. Benson deserves to sleep in a real bed. Randy would love to sleep in a real bed. Probably they’ve got to lay low a little while longer. Probably two states north isn’t far enough. 

Benson drives like a grandma. Randy hasn’t said anything, but he figures they could be at least to the border of Iowa by now if Benson wasn’t so hung up on driving three miles under the speed limit and calling it “flying under the radar,” even as cars peeled by them on all sides. 

But he’s the driver now. 

He realizes this is something he can do. A way to repay him, just a little bit. Randy didn’t get them into this mess, not exactly, but he can get them far, far away from it. Safety, serenity. A place where no one knows their faces. He can find that for Benson. He can take him there. He can make sure he wakes up somewhere better than the shithole behind them.

He eases his foot down on the gas, coaxes the needle on the speedometer up and over 80. The car huffs a protest, but it obeys. 

Good boy, he thinks, and he smiles. 

Benson stirs just after they leave Iowa. It’s still dark out, but the horizon is starting to bleed pink. He sits up slowly, stretches, nearly elbows Randy in the face. “Fuck,” he groans, “what time is it?” 

“Breakfast time, almost,” Randy says. “Just looking for somewhere to stop.” 

Benson blinks around the sleep in his eyes, peers through the window into the dark rushing by. “Where are we?” 

“Wisconsin. Or maybe Minnesota. I’m not…a hundred percent sure.” 

Benson furrows his brow. “Jesus Christ, Randy. You break the fuckin' sound barrier?”

“No,” Randy says calmly. “Everyone speeds on the interstate. You just keep an eye on it, it's fine.”

Benson gives him a long look and for a second, Randy thinks he might be mad. But then he breaks into a grin, chuckles, shakes his head and stretches again. His shirt rides up and in the dark of the dawn Randy can just make out the triangle of hair on his stomach. He bites his cheek. 

“Speed Demon Bradley. Who’d’ve thought.” Benson yanks the backrest up, sits back and looks out with fresh eyes on new scenery. “You got a destination in mind, captain?”

Randy does. Has for the last few hundred miles. “Yeah. I was thinking…maybe Lake Superior?”

“What's so superior about it?”

“I don't know, it's…really big. Like…huge. I just thought…it would probably be pretty. I’d–I’d like to see it.” With you. I'd like you to be there too.

He glances over and Benson is staring at him with an odd look on his face. 

“...what?” Randy says. 

Benson starts nodding, frowning thoughtfully, then reaches over and thumps Randy on the chest. “Then let's go see it.”

The impact echoes through his heart and lungs. “Yeah?”

“Fuck yeah. Randy makin’ decisions.” Benson claps his hands once, loud. “I like it. You wanna go see some big fuckin’ lake? I'm all for it.”

Randy fights a grin and doesn't know why, so he stops, lets it come, feels the stretch of it across his face. “Cool.”

Randy looks over and thinks he’s beautiful. Bloody knuckles, bad attitude, and all. He lets that thought linger for one, two, three seconds before it blows out the window like a wayward receipt.

“Cool.”

Benson rolls down the window and sticks his head out like a dog. The air whipping into the car smells nothing like home. His hair blows back and he squints into the wind, the early sun kissing his cheeks pink. 

“I can take over,” Benson offers over his shoulder. “I’m guessin' you need a break.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Randy squeezes his hands on the wheel at ten and two. “I got it. I'm good.”

And he really means it.

[starhvney]

my first time w this but can I rq zenix x short fem reader? one shot or hc or anything atp i can survive off crumbs alone

(mystreet and maybe they have a playful banter dynamic? (dying i am so shy)(if no then thats okay u can delet this :3))

𝐏𝐈𝐏𝐒𝐐��𝐄𝐀𝐊

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: zenix x short!fem!reader

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: he won’t let you exist without giving you the daily reminder that you’re short

𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐒: fluff, slice of life, zenix and reader playfully argue and banter, zenix doesn't know how to admit his feelings ever

𝐂𝐖: none? 

𝐀/𝐍: yes, i can! this is so cute, anon! i went ahead and added headcanons and a small drabble to this. it’s not super long, but i hope i was able to write what you wanted. you’re my first request so thank you, i hope you enjoy! (i might make a one shot going more in depth on this dynamic but i wanted to get this out asap for you :))

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

☆ it doesn’t matter what age you two met, he’s always going to tease you for your height

☆ in high school, before he could ever admit his feelings for you (because that would be so lame and not hardcore), he would use teasing as a way to talk and flirt with you while still keeping his composure and pride.

it was so close, yet so far out of reach. you strained your calves as your fingers barely brushed the top shelf.

“c’mon!” you quietly groan to yourself, hopping and once again missing the book above you.

a quiet snort can be heard from behind you, causing you to narrow your eyes and turn to the noise. zenix leans on the bookshelf, his hand covering his nose and mouth as looks up through dark lashes at you with a poorly concealed grin. his eyes crinkled and lifted up, and the tenseness in his shoulders gave away that he was really trying not to laugh.

“what? aren’t you gonna help me?” you accuse, pointing a finger in his direction.

he drops his hand, the amused smirk on his lips annoyingly prominent as he crosses his arms and lifts his chin up, another annoying laugh leaving his lips.

“no, i think i’ll just watch from here.”

your eyebrows pinch together and your nose scrunches up in annoyance. with narrowed eyes you look him up and down. what was he even doing in the library?

“whatever, you probably can’t read the title anyways.”

“…what?!” his voice raised in confusion. his little smirk is gone as his jaw drops and his eyebrows furrow.

“besides, i may be short, but that doesn’t make you tall. you’re probably also too short to reach this book.” you continue to taunt, satisfied at the annoyed red hue growing on his cheeks.

“WHAT?!” he exclaims, this time much too loud for the library.

“you two, out of my library now! you’re being way too loud. you’re old enough to know basic manners in a library.” the librarian appears from the end of the aisle, an annoyed look on her tense face as one hand rests sternly on her hip and the other points at the door.

“but, i wasn’t-“

“now!”

you two silently walk out of the library doors, before you turn to zenix with narrowed eyes.

“that’s your fault.”

“huh? no it’s not, you started it!”

“no, you did!”

“no-“ he cuts himself off with an annoyed groan, shoving something in your face rather abruptly.

grabbing on to it, you move it away to see what it was. it was the book you were trying to reach. you look back up at him with a raised eyebrow.

“what?! you said i couldn’t reach it, but i could, easily!”

“but it’s still not checked out, so you stole it.”

“borrowed without asking.”

“well, you still did what i asked you. for someone so much taller and cooler than me you’re pretty gullible, huh?”

his face turns red again, mouth stuttering open before snapping back shut. he narrows his eyes at you before quickly snatching the book up and taking off down the hallway.

“hey! zenix, what the hell!” you take off after him.

“see if your short legs can keep up!”

he landed you two in more trouble soon after for running and yelling in the halls.

☆ sometimes he’d slip up, showing how he really felt about you… in his own, zenix way. 

“your hands are tiny.” he suddenly notes. burnt, red-brown eyes narrow down at your hands.

“huh?” you stretch your hand out in the air. 

zenix’s larger, warmer hand meets yours, palm to palm as he compares the difference. it’s enough for the tips of his fingers to curl a bit over yours, you glance back at him with raised eyebrows. his messy brown hair hangs in his face, but doesn’t hide his softened expression as he concentrated on your hands touching.

he makes eye contact with you, cheeks bursting into flames as he fumbles for an excuse.

“it must be because you’re so short.” he blurts out.

“feeling bold today, zenix?” gene’s voice startles the both of you, your hands both shooting back down to your laps.

“what- i don’t know what you’re talking about!”

☆ as you two get older, it eventually evolves into much more playful banter, and everybody is used to this just being your dynamic.

☆ you don’t get as irritated about it, but zenix still loves making use out of your height difference. 

you two stand in line in the coffee shop, eyes squinting as you read the menu, when you feel the weight of zenix’s arm on top of your head. rolling your eyes, you glance up at zenix with a half-assed glare as he leans on you.

“really?”

he barely spares you a glance from the menu, raising an eyebrow as if he was confused what your problem was.

“what?”

you roll your eyes before looking back up at the menu.

"you're not even that tall."

"i'm taller than you, pipsqueak."

a huff leaves your lips. you stiffen your hand straight, before ramming it quickly into his side. he grunts as he hunches over, his arm leaving your head to clutch his side. he finally shoots a half-assed glare back to you, before moving his arm back up to rest on your shoulder instead. this time you don't complain.

“what are you getting?”

“…caramel macchiato.”

“…yeah, same.”

©starhvney, 2024. please do not steal or repost my works as your own.

[goodolddumbbanana]

You know that one roadtrip chart meme?

Wait actually Imma find it-

This but your House of Suns AU

All the Suns are in the car. The thing at first is pretty normal, with Sunny being the one who drives, the two biggest mouths Sunshine and SunBOT are also sleeping peacefully with Sundrop in the back seat and Dark Sun is just playing roadtrip games with Goose Sun without touching any of his cryptic plans.

Even Sun, Servant and Cringe Sun join in with their game later too...

But then 4 hours pass....

Sunny's forehead is twitching. The beautiful peaceful environment has long gone, and has been replaced with... chaos

Sunshine and SunBOT *yelling and screaming into a choir* : MCDONALD! MCDONALD!!! WE WANT MCDONALD!!!

(*Cringe Sun to Sun, crying, sobbing ugly with another vodka on his hand. He drunkenly hugged Sun like an octopus captured his prey while Sun just awkwardly tried to sit comfortably and looking around to find his saviour. Which is none. *)

So I like... You need to stop it, it is not you, you know? And that mf didn't listen, he just shook his butt towards me and moon waltzed out of my face... how can I be this beta??? I used to be a Sigma. And now I'm just some common bitch 🤡🤡

(*Sunny wonders if it is what it feels like when a thermometer breaks its boiling point.*)

Sun: Sunny, Goose Sun wants to go pee... We need to stop...

Sunshine and SunBOT *keeps yelling* : MCDONALD! MCDONALD!!!

(*Cringe Sun just shakes violently Sundrop who still sleeps through all the chaos. Sobbing harder*)

Why has he left me!!!! I hate him!!!!

(*rambling*rambling*rambling*)

SNAP!!

(*Sunny screams. He just shouted on top of his lung, the loudest sound he could do.*)

STOP YELLING!! I AM SICK OF YOU PEOPLE KEEP MOANING AND BITCHING ON MY CAR!!!

IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP AND GIVE ME A BREAK, I WILL BREAK YOU INSTEAD!! AND BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAID IT IS GONNA BE LIKE A GLOW STICK!!

IF I HEAR A SINGLE SOUND COME OUT FROM YOU GUYS AGAIN, I WILL KILL YOU, YOU AND YOU, AND THEN MYSELF!!! DON'T DARE ME!! I WILL DO IT!!!

(*The car became silent. No one dares to say. Then Sun raises his hand, talks with the stutter and nervous manners.)

Sunny: OH MY GOD--- WHAT??! I KNOW, WE WILL STOP SOON, OKAY!?? ASK HIM TO WAIT!!!

Sun: Actually... I just want to ask... Haha... Do you see Servant?

Sunny: What are you talking about, he is right here---... in the car.

There must be some realization because then Sunny kept hitting his head on the steering wheel.

Sunny: OH MY GOD... WE FORGOT HIM... OH MY GOD... WHERE IS HE!!!

Sun: hey hey calm down. It will be okay. I don't think Servant will go far... Maybe when you bought gas, we accidentally let him there behind...

Dark Sun looks so fabulous no one sees him about to throw SunBOT out of the car to sit right next to Sun: Accidentally? :))

Sunny: Dark Sun... What did you do?

Dark Sun: :)))

Sunny: WHAT DID YOU DO YOU LITTLE SHIT!!!

Servant about 24 kilometres far behind, just drinking smoothies while sitting on the floor and talking with a rock.

Servant: You don't understands me, Mr rock🪨🪨🪨 You don't understand how assholes all of them is.

[tac-the-unseen]

Pebble

König x reader fluff

A pebble.

A single pebble lay on your desk.

A dark Grey stone with little clear specks giving the illusion of sparkles. Not terribly unusual if not for the fact that rocks in all different smaller sizes keep showing up around your stuff. You have a jar filled with them. You had no clue why they keep showing up. Everyday one pebble just appears.

Its became routine. Wake up, get dressed, find the pebble, go to work.

You're pretty sure someone's fucking with you. Like 80% sure. You told your supervisors and higher ups. They've sent some to the labs and each time it was simply just a rock. Then will hand you back the shattered stone.

It puzzles you and everyone who knows about the mystery stones. You've asked night sift if they know anything and they just shrug their shoulders.

Some people think a bird of some kind trying to court you. Others think someone is pranking you. And you leen to the latter here. Someone has to be joking with you. Why else would anyone do this? At least the pebbles make you somewhat happy.

To König the pebbles were a simple act of affection without having to get to close to you. Every morning he would get up, go outside and find a rock he likes. Then after putting all his love into it (squeezing the pebble in-between him plams and say nice things to it) he places it somewhere you'd notice.

He's mesmerized your routine so you never catch him in the pebble-placing act.

He thinks that because the pebble makes him happy it will in return make you happy.

Sometimes he finds the rocks on his missions. The pebble catches his attention for a brief moment and then it's in his pocket.

He thinks the rocks are beautiful and wants to give you that beauty.

He would love to tell you it him gifting you pebbles but he's terrified you'll call him weird and file a harassment claim. So he just keeps it up.

He even found tomorrow's pebble.

Tonight was the night. Tonight you finally had the night shift. Tonight you were gonna catch the pebble-placer.

Buuuuut you forgot one thing......the night shift was sooooo boring. Your eyes bore into the green lit monitors. Watching for intruders who dared to step into the base.

Coffee slowly became your best friend. You and the other poor soul on grave yard duty alternated making rounds about the base.

You read the clock....0200....2 AM....Mina stood from her chair. She stretched like a she was praying to a God and then made a hum. " my turn then." You nod as she swayed to the door. She stopped then turn to face you "Should a bring back a snack?" You nod again "Fuck yeah. Anything is good." She smiles lightly at you." alright, see ya."

"see ya." You repeat.

You watch on the monitors as she wanders around. Then you foot steps outside the door. You look down at the screens once again. Only to see the person just out of frame. Just barely out of sight.

You grab the gun from your hip. While the chance of an intruder are slim it will never be zero. You point it at the door and stayed there.

The door knob slow turned. A tall figure pushed into the dimly lit room then it paused.

There stood König. Eyes blown wide from what little you could see under his sniper hood. His shoulders tensed and hitched up. His arm slowly come up as to look non-threatening.

"König? what are you do here this late??" You whisper shout as you put your gun back in the holder on your hip. He seemed to relax for a moment. You and König have been friends for a few years. Not super close but close enough to hang out sometimes.

He started to panic trying to find an excuse. "I-I...got lost...." he stuttered out. You don't buy it. Before you can say something, Your eyes travel to one of his hands. it looks like he's holding something. He follows your gaze and snaps his hands to his chest. "I'm sorry I'll leave." He scrambled to the door. Out of instinct you grab him.

"König get back in here!" You yank at his shoulder. He freezes again then turns to you. His eyes are filled with fear but he listens and steps back into the room. You close the door behind him and take a breath.

You move to look in his eyes. "König why are you actually here?" He responds with the shaky breath. He looks around and then looks at the door, planning his escape. He looks down at his hand. "Can....Can I show you something and you not make fun of me?" He says softly.

You nod your head. "of course König. What do you want to show me?" He trembles and slowly holds out his hand to yours. He grabs your hand and opens it. softly a little light Grey pebble fall out onto your plams.

Your eyes blow wide as you stare at the pebble. You look up to meet König's eye only to see him make a run to the door.

He's gone before you have the chance to say anything.

 ∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆

Minor editing to format!

This was my first post and it blew up on AO3. So if you've ever wondered who wrote the pebble head cannon, that me!