#i think art has made me lonely ngl

[skilled-plaque]

What art programs do you use? And how long have you’ve been doing digital art for?

I have done it for 4 years now. On my fourth Yee ^^

I use ibis paint for free on my school tablet!

And I've been drawing for almost a decade now!

I have no money for a stylus but I don't think I need one :P

[toffeebrews]

Any errink headcanons? :D

Tumblr hates me so I had to rewrite this, anyway... [Note: all my hcs ofc nothing is canon but some may be based of canon information! Sometimes I may refer to non-canon past rps :P]

Error and ink do dumb rps with his puppets together, they've made a super dramatic soap opera plot.

I think Ink realizes Error would never change and he's content with that (sigh as much as I would love to say he would).

Ink finds error's six tongues fascinating, rather than gross. In a similar way, error is fascinated by ink's star eyes (I wonder what that hc came from).

If they ever kissed it would be the most disgusting revoltingly thing ever because error doesn't know how to kiss at all and he also has 6 tongues.

If you asked them how they became friends they would just look at you and shrug. Not even they know how to happened. All they can say is they "get eachother." Error deep down has always wanted a friend and Ink gives him that. Ink is willing to deal with error's bs and error is willing to deal with ink's. Ink can feel a little lonely in his own role and among a world that is fake and Error being an outcode like hin understands him a way others wouldn't. Not even mentioning their story parallels but I gotta stop my self before I start rambling. They're some of the only people who know some of other's deep insecurities.

Ink found Error's crashes funny before he knew how absolutely painful they were. Although not sure if he would ever trigger them on purpose even before he knew ngl.

more yapping under the cut

I would define them as whatever happens when you cross a friend an enemy and a partner.

Ink loves all of his shipkids and error... feels very conflicted about all of them.

They also think the other is a freaky than them when in reality they're both freaks.

Error still thinks about when Ink proposed to him at loveball, ink doesn't think about it at all. Ink also proposed to him with a ring pop that he found in the candy bowl in my head LOL.

Ink doesn't mention his dads to him .. maybe out of fear

Other people still make fun of Ink for proposing to error at loveball and ink always goes "IT WAS ONE TIME!"

Error and Ink are both quite short, Error is only a few inches taller than Ink.

Due to loveball, Error is always scared (in a playful way) when Ink starts drinking.

Error does feel guilty for the time he left ink in the antivoid. Not all of the time, but at times when hes sitting with Ink in the anti-void he can't help but reflect on it. If he would ever admit it? Probably not.

Error and ink's dancing at loveball was a beautiful disaster. Ink is actually an okay dancer but because Error was really nervous it threw him off and it was so off beat. It was really cute though, regardless.

Ink finds errorink ship art very amusing and he shows it to error just to freak him out sometimes.

Error always kills ink first in among us. Error also always blames ink as the imposter even if he isn't.

They have a "close but not too close" rule just close enough to feel the warmth of the other person but not enough to touch. (do skeletons give off warmth?). They do hold pinkies though fr fr. Also Error does lay his head in Ink's lap sometimes, typically when they're watching something. Ink may also give Error forehead or hand kisses.

I like to think Error runs quite hot, because he crashes all the time, so hes warm like a computer LOL. Ink who in my hc has a lessen sense of touch and runs sorta cold due to be soulless lovess sitting around him because of it.

Crack headcanon, when error's eyes glitch up or hes about to crash if you really listen you can hear the sound of computer fans going ham.

Ink will often just... walk up to error and put him a different outfit. Something about his being "too basic" and "his outfit has an ugly color palette".

If you know my pinkie sense ink hc Error doesn't know HOW it works but he fully believes him every single time. Even when ink is trolling, LOL!

Error and Ink call eachother "Ruru" and "Kiki" but only to annoy the other. Specifically if ink is pleading for something he'll do it to annoy him "please ruru :(" They also call eachother glitch and squid in a movking as well LOL.

They have friendship rings? platonic rings? idk if those are a thing made from blue string.

In my own error design, he has a big tooth. Because of it ink calls him a "big kitty" to make fun of him.

[oklotea]

Click for better quality!

Then Maddie pressed her face to the mirror, and it was cold glass. A level, delicate pane. It was known. All Looking-Glasses were mirrors, but no mirrors were Looking-Glasses anymore. She sat back, looking at her inverse who wore her own distant expression, and made them both smile. “Perhaps tomorrow.” Though she knew home would be impossible then, too.

WOOHOOOO!!!!! ANOTHER EAH:RIR SCENE REDRAW!!!!! god I hate traditional art. NO. NO I PROMISE I DON'T. I just. Hate. My traditional art. I PROMISE I'LL GET BETTER, I PROMISE I WILL

EAH:RIR is a REALLY GOOD EAH REWRITE FIC BY @gumjester and you should go read it!

I'm ngl this chapter really fucking ruined me. MADDIEEEEE AGHHJEJFJDNKEK ALL THE WONDERLANDIANS MAKE ME SAD, THINKING ABOUT THEIR BACKSTORY AND JUST HOW MUCH MORE PROPER ATTENTION IS GIVEN TO HOW TRAGIC IT IS, AGHHHHH aghhhhh gumjester wtf what the HELL WERE YOU ON WHEN DESCRIBING MADDIE'S THOUGHT PROCESS. It was just so, BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN AND HORRIFICALLY SAD AND AHHDBWBANDJ I CAN'T FUCKING PUT IT INTO FUCKING WORDS

SHE WANTS TO GO HOME SO BAD, ALL OF THEM DO, BUT THEY ALL FUCKING KNOW THAT NO ONE WANTS TO PUT IN THE EFFORT TO EVEN HELP THEM. NO ONE CARES. NOT FOR YEARS.

And FUCKING MILTON GRIMM THAT BITCH

Maddie's rationalizing that Milton was angry because he can't believe something has lived in ever after for so long without his permission, MUAH. CHEFS KISS. THE WONDERLANDIANS SEE RIGHT THROUGH THIS BITCH BASTARD.

LIKE. ACTUALLY MY FAVORITE CHAPTER SO FAR. IT RUINS ME. IT FEELS LIKE A HUG AFTER A 3 HOUR LONG BREAKDOWN. IT'S SO WELL WRITTEN AND PERFECT IN EVERY ASPECT. FUCK. WHAT IN THE FUDGE. FUCK.

I miss them so much. I miss the wonderlandians. I miss eah. AGHHHH

I listened to gumjester's Maddie playlist while drawing this and uhmmmmm..... Wow I can see where the inspiration came from. ALSO ALL OF IT IS AMAZING MUSIC. I LOVE MUSIC. I LOVE ART. THIS FIC MAKES MY DAYS BETTER. AGH. FUCK

Anyway uhhhhhhh have a good day everyone, say nice things to me I'm lonely

[griancraft]

Ok as per my last post. This is Long and very much about my feelings so uh don’t read it if you don’t want to. Also I’m aware I sound genujneky crazy for half of this I’m just really really mentally ill in ways I don’t talk about here at all and now I am sharing them and it’s. A little scary but oh well. The system stuff is the stuff I’m most concerned about right now to be honest bc it effects my day to day and if anyone has any kind words or thoughts on what to do I’ll be happy to listen

Please read my previous post if you’re mad /gen I don’t think I say anything bad here but I have really bad morality ocd so like uhm I am scared to post this!!! Prev post

Also I’m very sorry that the prose is terrible to read and my spelling is shit I have dyspraxia which is a coordination thing and it’s worse rn

The maybe I was boring album came on yesterday while I was cleaning and I had to stop what I was doing and turn it off halfway through because I just couldn’t stop hearing an admission. I wasn’t even sad I was just. So done with it. I still am just kinda like. God I hope Shelby is doing ok with all this being public now. I’m glad she was able to heal like she said and I’m glad she made the video dude.

I almost got his lyrics tattooed if that’s testament to how much I loved his early music. It’s not connecting in my brain that this music that’s been apart of my life for like 4 years and helped me through so much was made by an abuser.

But like, in retrospect you can see it. I can’t bear to delete ycgma off my mp3 player bc I related to his songs so much as an abused lonely teenager but I also can’t bare to listen to it. I learned the fall on my guitar as my final exam and I used to repeat his lyrics to myself to cope with abuse and I wish I could still love these songs. I dressed like his dsmp character bc I thought it made me look cool. Which is lame as fuck to admit now lol

Originally I was planning on pirating them and I like, can’t especially after that manipulative ass statement. How much was an act? I don’t know. I don’t know if I’m a bad person because I still kinda do want to listen to that music again. I still want to feel that safe but I know I won’t feel that way anymore.

with dsmp stuff I think I’m going to be still able to look back fondly on it generally and I don’t think I’ll ever stop. The community was what made it and the community is what I loved, and i still do. I don’t think I’m going to reblog art of him specifically but if he’s in it I might. Idk. My policy on dream fanart is if he’s not alone in the art and it’s dsmp or mcc related I reblog so I guess I’ll continue that here. Im sorry if that sounds callous I just. Am not prepared to talk about this so I’m going back and forth

And like. We also have a wilbur factive/fictive and we have for years now and nobody in our system knows how to feel about that. He formed to fill the role of a big brother (I was being heavily emotionally neglected at that point and needed someone to be there for me) and protector from my parents abuse. Obviously, he is entirely separate from his source now bc alters change a lot for me but how we picture him is still wilbur. he’s literally just some guy now but grappling with that connection is fucked up dude it’s weird. He’ll probably further distance himself but it still fucking sucks and I don’t know how to communicate the cognitive dissonance we had to push through bc our brain struggled at first to make sense of how this person who we liked so much that he became the template for a Protector to shield us from the emotional neglect and abuse, essentially, is a terrible person. I’m sorry I know people who aren’t systems, and some who are ngl, will find this fuckibg nuts and I get that but we’re a very very internal person like I just. Kinda am with us as a system a lot and nobody else. It feels like my safe space that I’ve created in my head has been marred. Also. uhm. Our alters speak in distinct voices so it’s bad bad for me rn and we are trying to fix it. I know I know fictives and factives arenttheir source but that doesn’t change that it makes me feel gross. I’m rambling rn I’m sorry. Support Shelby.

[korolife]

Blog No.000🧺 24年4月5日

『KoroLife』 : (I wish for) A Colorful Life

in hindsight I probably should've started with this introduction but ah well

Hello! I go by Aki Shourikawa, also known as TheAwesomeAki-kun from DeviantArt. Ever since dA "died" in 2019, I felt like I lost a place where creativity and the fun aspects of making art was celebrated and utilized. With the character-limiting, trend-chasing, confusing censorshipping, popularity-prioritizing algorithms and systems most social media sites use, I lost an outlet for expressing my scattered thoughts and experiences throughout my art journey.

Even though talking to the void for not having a following was normal to me even from my dA days, it felt especially lonely the past few years trying to move everything and start anew to cold, uncaring websites who valued clicks more than integrity or ingenuity. So much so that I just felt like I shouldn't even try doing anything apart from quietly feeling inadequate and too incompetent for anyone else outside my own head.

Outside of being a creator, I can hardly find artists I'd like to follow as a viewer in these sites now compared to before; when all the recommended recommendations tend to be the hundred-thousand-eyeball-popular artists that usually ➀cater to a younger demographic for profit, or just ➁follow along with whatever is currently trending and mirror what other artists already made. Not that there's anything bad about understanding your market and making profit off of it! It's just... art, to me, has always been an escape from ridiculous societal standings, hierarchies, or denomination prejudices present in day-to-day lifeーEveryone is capable of drawing or making art, and that's something I've always liked about it. But even if bad apples with bad takes are probably just a minority to an otherwise wholesome majority of artists out there... the idea of transforming the creation of art into a pure competitive market, or even some kind of 'content' generator somehow leaves a bad taste in my mouth, personally.

I want to see more of artists who create their own art as a showcase of how they perceive the world in their unique sense and style, just because! But those types (especially ones without a following) seem to keep getting shadowbanned, stunted, and pushed away by unquenchable zombie algorithms that push and normalize this trend.

There's a lot of laughably bad things to say about DeviantArt's online reputation, but I found that a lot of like-minded lurkers were easier to find back then + genuinely interact with beyond one-word compliments and befriend over a common interest (art!) regardless of following size, skill level, or what have you...compared to how it is these days where it's a ridiculous..."looking for art moots, but I will be picky❤"-kinda world. It was probably because it was focused as an art website and not just a really broad scope of 'social media' site where everything non-art also goes down the hatch...that was the case for old dA, at least.

Now, enter Tumblr!ーa site that I've been extremely familiar with even before I started uploading my stuff online, even though I haven't used it myself mostly because of DRAMAtical Murder memes ngl- and while I understand it still contains most of the flaws I've listed of other social media websites... it's meant to be a blogging site! With multiple blogs for multiple different things! That'll work great for me!... with my category-varied 2.4k submissions on old dA...I think!!

So instead of moping around for halcyon days as I did the past 4 years or so now, through Tumblr's platform... I wanted to get back to being productive again and document an aspect of my life that I wish to be filled with different colors and flavors. Through this nonsensical ramblingy, longass tangent about not liking other social media sites in comparison to old dAーalreadyーI'm doing it now!!

I want to learn all sorts of things when it comes to drawing, so I want to share all the failed experiments, confusing experiences, and silly things that generally makes me a little happy when I'm drawing. Even though I'll probably still be talking to the void...I think even the void will appreciate having more than 280 characters to use without sounding like an incoherent, shattered fortune cookie prophecy.

And if somehow, somewhere, someone finds and reads through them.... I hope they can give some form of motivation, inspiration, entertainment, or a cautionary tale for your own artistic endeavors, maybe? like, underestimating your deadlines and procrastinating at the last day, then panic upon the realization that you should've started like a wholeass year ago to finish the task at hand, then proceed with praying to a god (of your choice) and cramming until the very last minute til you nearly break your hands! Me and my 7-, 11-, 14-, 19- and 23-year-old selves do not recommend this at all! Tune in next week for more wild experiences that will summon forth bombasticeth side-eyes!!-

See you around, and for now, I hope you have a nice day ahead! 'v')/

・・・ALL LINKS・・・

・Art Gallery・Commission Info・Ko-fi shop・

Main blog・Art blog・Non-chatterbox drawing process (KoroLite)

[marshmallowprotection]

Heya, Kait! Been a while, huh? A lot has happened honestly. I started to post some of my art here, even though I'm not that motivated to do digital art much-

I don't want to make this too long but I've actually gotten way more comfortable with self-shipping with the second character I told you about! I'd like to tell you a bit about him, too. His name is Yatora Yaguchi, he is from Blue Period!

Recently I've actually gotten a bit more better at my art and even a bit more confident all thanks to this media and especially Yatora. His experiences with art made me feel seen because I relate so much to how he feels and the way he learns more about art had opened my eyes in so much stuff about art as well. I'd love to ramble about how much Yatora means to me but it's gonna be extremely long, honestly.

He is a very emotional and insecure guy deep inside and he tries his best with art and even to have good relationships with the people around him, even if he doesn't fully agree with them. He is friendly and I love his appearance a lot. The fact he cries easily and blushes very easily makes me appreciate him even more, he's so cool istg- I find how hard he works very admirable and so much stuff about him.

I still tend to focus on Saeyoung as well sometimes but my main focus is Yatora for now. Although, I do want to focus more on the redhead, Saeyoung has also helped me through a lot in my life and I feel grateful for both him and Yatora.

I tried redoing Saeyoung's route once more and I still feel myself loving this precious redhead. I just wish I could focus on the both of them equally. Even if I could do a crossover between the two, I'm not really sure about it so I just imagine two different versions of myself in their worlds.

But I am kinda sad there's not a lot of fics, fanart (ngl it's mostly ship art even though there's.. no romance in the actual series) and other stuff of Yatora. At least we have an anime of this series and a lot of manga panels of this boy, even official merch and more but I can always write self-inserts or even random prompts I find online. Even though the manga is still ongoing, I'm thinking of not doing many self-inserts with Yatora yet. I do wanna see the whole story fully before inserting myself into it. Though I know it's gonna take months, even years.

Other stuff.. I'm at my grandma's! I'm still kinda sad I can't use a bike because it has some problems, we still have cats, chickens, actual ground outside I can walk for a while and even going to the beach by my uncle's car. And I won't lie, it feels.. lonely a lot here? I don't do much during the day, sure I draw here and there but that's it mostly.

The people that used to come out to play with balls and even ride their bikes aren't really here anymore. They grew up and stopped coming. So I'm just trying to get through the days as much as I can.

And one thing that actually happened recently.. remember when I named you after a Snow Wraith, Kait? Sadly, the game shut down a while ago. And the thing is that it actually shut down the exact same day I came at my grandma's. I don't mind that I wasn't on at the last moments of this game but man, it's still something.

It's insane how all my dragons must be at the hidden world by now. I actually started that account when I was here at my grandma's. So the game ending the same day I finally came at my grandma's makes me feel some type of way.

I actually used to play that game for at least 7+ years and then settled on working on one account, no matter how long it took, which was this one. I actually had most dragons but them making everything free at the end which allowed me to get everything and get them to the max instantly felt kinda.. off.

So for 2-3 days. I flew around with every single one of my dragons, fed them fully and took off their saddles before saying goodbye. I took screenshots of every single one of them, too. It feels weird but this game was really fun sometimes.

I think I'll end my rambling here, I'd love to send asks about Yatora and Saeyoung and ramble about them. Yatora gets really flustered just like our redhead Saeyoung and it's making me smile a lot. Although at Yatora's side, he isn't exactly a dude who teases someone else or flirts. I love how even though Yatora and Saeyoung have some similarities, they are still different.

I hope you have been well, Kait. I miss sending asks, haha. Please let me know how you are, I'd love to know and catch up with you!

Hello, hello! I'm happy to hear that you're doing better. I'm sorry that your favorite dragon game shut down its servers. I've had two games do that this year and it really bites. It definitely makes me wish there was a way to get tangible offline versions of our favorite games so it would never be lost, but that's a tough bargain in our society. All that leaves us with is the memories, and that's not too bad, because we'll always have those.

I don't know anything about Blue Period but I've seen the art before and it looks pretty! I think it's great when you find a character who's capable of reaching you and showing you something that you didn't know about yourself until you dove into the story. Like, it's important to have those experiences with characters, regardless of if we love it or not.

Sometimes, you need a hard mirror to look at instead of a soft way. I feel that way about some characters. As much as I love growth from tenderness, damn, sometimes we need a smack in the face to see a new angle we never imagined before, you know what I mean? I get it from the strangest places! So, yeah. It's not weird.

When it comes to tying to your different loves together, there is no right or wrong way. I definitely enjoy crossovers where I can find the best way to see myself with all my favorite characters, or at least, two of them because I love world-building and seeing where that goes...

I am just that kind of person, though! I can't tell you how interesting it is to have my brain debate the best way to tie together Obey Me and Mystic Messenger or Mystic Messenger and Tears of Themis or what have you!

I'd love to hear you babble about your new love whenever you get the chance to! I've got a lot of free time and I love talking to my buddies online about everything, not just MM.

So, if you get the urge out of the blue, just send me an ask!

If you're doubtful of that working out, though, don't worry about trying to tie them all together, friend. You don't need to tie those universes together if it's hard or you're getting comfort in different ways from each character. Not everything has to unite, sometimes you just need to have things pushed apart!

I'm doing alright these days. Some days are tough, some days are easier, and some are in the middle. Pain flares have been more often these days, though. It makes it hard to write so I'm not putting out as much as I want, but hey, health comes first and that's just how it is. I can't nudge myself into exhaustion. Saeran wouldn't like that and it's that fact that keeps me taking care of myself. Cheesy, but it works, I think that's a good thing.

Right now, I'm working on some self-care. I want to put out another installment in my self-insert series with Ray... I've got the plot set up and I'm so close to getting things where I want them to be.

[consistantly-changing]

[Image descriptions in order: screenshots of tags left on the post. They say: #literally #i stopped posting bc no one engages with my fics at all #its not a pleasant feeling #i dont want to have to join fucking discord servers or some other forums just for the off chance that ppl might be discussing my fic #you have to leave comments on fics #or else what is the point]

[#how infuriating to know there are people saying nice things about you who won't say them "to" you]

[#i remember finding out once #that a group of mutual fandom acquaintances had an entire roleplay server based off one of my fics #meanwhile it was sitting at 50 hits 3 likes and 0 comments #then they got upset at me for shelving the fic like #what did you expect]

[#yeahhhhhhhh #every day my desire to write again is knocked down by shit like this]

[dude feed your writers and your artists #making art is lonely and we share it to find community]

[#ao3 #fandom #i struggle with the lack of comments so much #like i legit feel like theres no point in posting sometimes might as well just keep shit in the google docs]

[#my Non-Secret AO3 account's been updated recently too and there hasn't been much engagement #it kind of soured me on updating those stories for awhile]

[why is there this weird push to make fandom less accessible to OTHER FANS?]

[#writing #i get kudos nearly every day and it's lovely #but i get comments like #once every few months #people are reading but not leaving their thoughts #and ngl that kinda sucks]

[#How are writers supposed to know you like their work if they CANNOT see it??? #How are they supposes to stay motivated and write more if they cannot see how many people actually like it??? #I am writing 13k-15k chapters; do you know how LONG that takes??? How much time and effort??? #It's why I reblog the chapter index as much as I do; I NEED people to tell me if they like them #Otherwise it just feels like I'm posting my stuff on a brick wall that nobody is looking at #It's SO demotivating; to the point where I start to wonder if it's even worth continuing at times]

[#Brb literally crying at the very idea of how cheated I would feel if people did this for my fics]

[#(I keep discovering people that have-according to them- been gushing about my writing on discord) #(often I didn't even know these people existed because they never left me a comment) #(sometimes it's only months later through discord that I learn lots of people loved a scene that I thought totally flopped-) #(-because nobody ever once said anything about that scene in my comments.) #(if nobody says they liked it-I assume nobody liked it. please tell me if you like it.) #(you can tell your friends too but I'm gonna get a lot more out of it than they are.)]

[#yeah I got like six kudos the other day on a 150k fic from three years ago #and i was like ok clearly someone has shared this in their discord group and they've all read it and that's lovely! #they must have said really nice things about it for the whole group to presumably have talked about it a lot (it is 150k of fic) #wish a single one of them had said that in a comment instead of me having to just imagine the situation!]

[#fics literally need comments to survive like #yeah its for yourself and for the joy of creating #but its a STORY #with detail put into it and plot twists and things that i want to #im TELLING YOU a story #of course i want to see how the people im telling the story to think lol #PLEASE comment]

[#i tried to get back into writing fic #but the sheer lack of comments made me feel less motivated #kinda need feedback or i feel like my writing is getting lost into the Void #so i deleted the fic and gave up]

[#this #like my god why go to such lengths to NOT tell the author you liked their fic #this sort of thing leads to despair and to writers quitting #please let writers know you appreciate their work #please #why must we beg for crumbs]

[#yeah #I try to avoid being driven or encouraged by comments too much #no matter how much I deeply love and appreciate everyone who DOES take that time #because people are tired and busy #but that feeling of if I stopped 10000 people would take my place #that hit kinda hard today]

[#i had this experience #people were talking about my fic on a server i wasn't on #meanwhile i was having an existential crisis because no one was commenting on the fic itself #i was ready to abandon it until someone told me about the server #only a few years ago i could expect at least 20 comments on each chapter #now if i hit double digits that feels like a win #fic writing woes]

[#please do this #writing is hard #← prev tags #Ain't it #l see people rave about my stories on rec lists or see lovely comments in the bookmarks #You're already writing all that down #Why would you not tell ME #You know I am a human person right? #I publish these this for you to enjoy; I want to SHARE them with you]

[#sometimes i will get half a dozen kudos on the same fic in one day #(my fics are not popular so this is notable for me lol) #and it does make me wonder if the link just got posted in a group chat somewhere that i'm not part of #i did once get added to such a group chat and i was like... why didn't any of you comment?]

[#yeah I had dozens of docs on ff.net #ao3? 2 #what's the point of writing fanfiction when it can stay perfect in my head and I get the same level of engagement anyway #I posted to find people to talk about the stuff I liked #nobody wants to chill so I don't post anymore]

[#THIS #I'll randomly get an uptick of kudoses on an older fic and know someone shared it in a group chat #But no comments :/]

[#jfc that just makes me want to scream #hey kids guess what - if you create these little book clubs and exclude fic authors #you won't get any more fic #i can't tell you how much the comment count on my fics has gone down over the years #because this generation of fans think that kudos or inbox-squeeing or DMs is a substitute for an actual comment]

[I've been told by a reader "they love your fic in my server" and like oh... Okay, guess I'll never find out. Oh well.]

someone I follow on the bird app just announced they're starting a very exclusive private fic server because they and a bunch of other people want to talk about how much they love the fics they're reading, and as an author can I just say that a really great place to talk about a fic you love is in the comments for that fic

I understand that people are trying to create safe spaces, but as the number of comments that I get on my fics dwindles with each passing year, knowing these spaces exist where my fics are being discussed, places that I am excluded from, makes me want to write fic LESS

I mean I guess who cares, right, because if I stop writing, there's 10,000 other people that will continue...but if you participate in a fic "book club" server and you say nice things there about a fic you loved, maybe copy and paste that into a comment on AO3?

the only thing fanfic writers are asking for in return for hours of hard work is attention. please don't rob us of the one thing that we hope for when we hit "post"

[xdollydoodlesx]

Just remembered I have a Wally Darling oc who’s based off the plushe I got of him. Backstory being they got brought to life by my adminsona Dolly… god that sounds cringe but screw it they are found family and they go on multiverse adventures together!

(Sorry for length I dunno how to put that ‘read more’ thing. I’m on mobile - -‘)

Enjoy a written desc cus I can’t art him to save my damn life 💚

-The inner curl of their pompadour shifts to green forming a lil heart shape

-Small cloth patches of various colors n shapes (like cloth stickers) lightly speckle his body from past mishaps

-He does still have his original outfit but when exploring he wears an outfit Dolly handmade for him… it’s still Welcome home themed ofc!

-Sports a special backpack/fannypack tho his is either inspired by Home or an apple, it’s packed to the brim with art supplies given he enjoys drawing the various folks n places he comes across… and hair care stuff… and pretty pebbles…

-Like cannon he’s around 3 feet tall meaning he’s a short stack like Dolly… well she’s taller cus 5” > 3” but that doesn’t make her more ‘mature’ that’s for sure XD

-Due to only knowing what their fandom creator has public his knowledge on his lore/etc varies but above all he’s still able to form into his own person.

For personality he’s mostly the same vibe-wise tho the knowledge of fandoms and his own existence kinda weigh on him sometimes… and he’s definitely not the best with self defense given he lacks Original!Wally’s abilities. (Eat via staring/etc)

He tends to take a bit when processing things + forgetful tho what he lacks in speedy actions n words he makes up for in being patient, creative, and ngl often the main braincell holder of the pair.

Also he be surprisingly stealthy having led to more than a few unintentional jumpscares. XD

For lore there isn’t much.

My adminsona has been lonely for a while and getting that plushe gave me the idea to make them into a friend for her, like to think she took the doll n animated it using a part of herself. ^^

Silly headcannons:

-Wally can technically consume but does not like eating things that require a lot of chewing/effort (Accepted noms include Puddings, ice, simple soups, jello, hard candies, ice cream, drinks n that sorta thing. Surprisingly has a fondness for non-painful sour or salty things)

-Due to being based on olden times (lol) he was flabbergasted by modern tech leading to many funny scenarios, doesn’t really use it much tho out of preference

-Dolly has given him piggyback rides or flat out carried him like a sack of potatoes when her energy outruns his.

-They are the only reason Dolly decides to find a quiet spot in the multiverse to form any sort of base in and ngl she’s thankful for it. Never having a real home took more of a toll then she realized… along with other health related things.

-They swap ‘little sibling/big sibling’ energy fr

-Wally once visited his home fandom but ended up quickly leaving due to the emotions being too much, now he’ll simply watch from the back lines lowkey surprised his world has so many versions and interps.

-Even with Dolly��s help he never really gets the hang of sewing… the similarity of his ‘skin’ and cloth wigs him out. He’s fine getting repairs tho.

-Dolly made him plushe’s of all his friends which he keeps in his pack at all times, he sometimes talks to them when alone which thankfully isn’t too often.

[new-message-4-u]

REALISTIC HEADCANNONS

-Gender neutral-

Characters: Kuroo, kenma, daichi, and aran.

A/N : Tell me if I made any mistakes or smth I was tempted to put Sugawara in it but I chose not to Lmao enjoy

ARAN OJIRO

If you wake my man up earlier than his schedule say, he'll ignore you untill you apologize

If you're hungry he'll go to the fridge and get the most healthy lookin shit to share with you

Plz don't wear his clothes he will genuinely be upset that he has to wash it

If he buys some food and you eat it first he'll take something you bought and hide it

Open his shit, (Food, soap, moisturizer, ect) and he will have WORDS for you

Make him a lil snacky snack, and he'll most likely feel bad and make you something.

Don't make him a bath. He likes it SINFULLY HOT. It could like, literally boil a human

Make sure not to text to much on date night or you're phone will be confiscated.

HORROR MOVIES. AT THE THEATER. EVERY DATE NIGHT. Then he'll say stuff during the ride home.

"SHIT WHATS THAT IN THE ROAD?" "Oh wow, is that a person? Let's pull over." "IS THAT A DEAD BODY?"

DAICHI SAWAMURA

You were probably his first ever SO. He was just to busy to bother

Will buy EVERYTHING for you. He just wants to be a movie boyfriend ngl

Gets scared when you fight and calls his support (Sugawara) in the middle of the fight

If you do something he doesn't like, he probably won't tell you unless it's gonna impact you both.

Is picky when something he makes isn't perfect and throws it away (Like his kids)

Buys food that he hates because you make it taste good. Like avacados, he hates the shit but likes it when you make guacamole.

Can make bomb ass mexican style soft tacos. Ya know the dry ass ones with the chicken, and the lime, and cilantro? YEAHHHHH BUDDY

If you make somethin his ass is gonna eat it. Like it could be nasty as fuck and he'll shove it down like its good

He'll even have the audacity to SAY it's good. The only was you'll know that it's bad is if he a.) Gags, or b.) Says a big word

"Oh..... Wow.... *Gag* This is.... *Gag* good...." "HUMPH..... How.... How scrumptious....."

KENMA KOZUME

His hair is crunchy as fuck. Just touch it before he washes it one night. I SAID TOUC-

*Ahem*, he injoys chugging sprite and munching sweet spicy doritos while he watches demon slayer.

Probs ignores you when he's gaming unless it's a special day like date night

If you like to game too then he lets you unless it's with his usual squad. Then, he'll kick you.

FORCES you to reach AR 16 so you can co op with his lonely ass in genshin

Makes you fuckin rich in gta and gets mad when you spend to much

You. Get. No. Love. EVAHHHHHHHH. Unless it's a special day. But other than that, EVAHHHHHHHH.

When you sleep, he'll sometimes watch you creepily. Just because.

Weekly dance time. You both get together and dance to the song you find during the week and ridicule each other's choices.

"You seriously listen to this dude?" "This song sucks, my turn." "OH I KNOW A BETTER SONG BY THIS GUY"

Kuroo tetsurou

HAIRSPRAY. TOO. MUCH. HAIRSPRAY.

You've woken up to a foggy room before. You just opened you're eyes and it B U R N E D.

He wakes you up every morning to shower with him just because he can

Insults you all the damn time and he knows you don't mind cuz you insult his dumb ass back

If he thinks your upset with him he annoys you and tells you jokes until you laugh

Makes you wear his jacket to every game so nobody flirts with you

He hangs out with the team, ALOT. You join him whenever he does though

Makes you terrible art that your meant to love. It's just so..... So..... Ugly

MANGAAAAA ALLL THEEEEE TIMMEEEEEEEEE

He's a BIG Otaku. He makes you binge watch Demon Slayer with him along with Jujutsu Kaisen

"BABE. BAAAABBBBEEEEE." "Come watch with meeee" "HEY COME SEE THIS HE DIED HAHAHA"

[yostresswritinggirl]

it seems boredom has taken over me due to the fact i have nothing to do but make up hcs of your universe reversal au, so here you go:

(im sorry if this is bothersome)

• if [y/n]'s va tries making a song cover of a romantic/love song with the character's voice, albedo would go overdrive and make an animatic centered around either: [y/n] x traveler or [y/n] x viewer (the other simps would also go crazy over both the cover and godly animatic ngl)

• childe would be the type to show and brag to his younger siblings about his genshin waifu/husbando/lover. teucer is usually his main listener, and he would feel prideful if teucer ever asks something about you out of curiosity or interest. definitely would go on a rant and word-vomit about how awesome and perfect you are.

• xiao's a famous and anonymous [y/n] x reader fanfic writer on tumblr/ao3/wattpad whose stories get very popular with the simps desperate for content

• zhongli bought a keychain displaying your chibi self from the official merch store. he keeps it dangling from his wallet's keychain holder (?) and is the prime reason why he remembers to actually bring his wallet sometimes. like, he's about to go outside to eat with a friend at mcdonald's or something; but he catches sight of your chibi self at the corner of his peripheral vision before he could so — and he's like: "oh hey it's my [y/n] keychain— oops, i also forgot my wallet again"

• venti would listen to [y/n] x listener videos on youtube. he might even go and commission someone for it (he might sometimes commission nsfw) (inspiration was taken from a past ask you received. thank you to the anon who gave me this idea).

• kaeya's a little shit in co-op and absolutely refuses to adjust/change his character (aka you). he's devoted to you and only you, even if your attacks aren't very effective on a particular boss/enemy (and even if said boss is immune to your attacks).

• though diluc isn't very involved with the fandom, he does occasionally look and scroll fanart of you (albedo's art usually). he may or may not have read and got hooked onto a [y/n] x reader fic (xiao's). he checks for updates once a week

• i hc that ganyu kind of has a hard time sleeping (she's overworked :(( ) since she usually pulls all-nighters, working on reports for her job. her body soon got used and adjusted to her terrible sleep schedule, so oftentimes during her day-offs; she has a hard time taking a well-deserved rest. sooooo, i think she listens to your theme song/voicelines (more specifically, the ones where you're all doting on the traveler or where you tell them to have a good night/rest). even better if your va has a relaxing song cover she could listen to and slowly fall asleep to. overall, GIVE THIS GIRL A BREAK.

-🐞

Okay, okay, ladybug anon I love you so much aldbaoakkw I love Universe Reversal brainrot so much and you're all so clever over it sksksksk

The VA thingy reminds me of either the ones Mihoyo made where Barbara or Amber interacts with the audience awww, or or they did a similar thing with Let The Wind Tell You collab with fanartists sodbksnso

I just imagined Childe bragging his imaginary waifu/husbando to a fuckin kid like a lonely degenerate omayghad

It's funny how if in this verse he is the top writer, it's divergent to the fact that @xiaowhore is the current top writer

THE ZHONGLI ONE IS THE ABSOLUTE CUTEST AND MOST ENDEARING TOO HFNBNF HE'S A GROWN MAN WITH AAN ANIME KEYCHAIN BUT THE PEOPLE AROUND HIM LOVE HIM TOO MUCH TO SHAME HIM

Venti VENTI would definitely be the type of person to buy Patreon subscription for those VA thingies and gives so much for their kofi account because they love it so much

I can definitely see Kaeya do this but but physical damage can do its work, and Kaeya can miraculously build (y/n) like 17k base attack, food buff, and then Bennett damage multiplier- he's a metaslave for his waifu/husbando

Diluc defo has an ao3 account that he keeps an absolute secret, but if you see his subscriptions, he has double digits of series and authors following

Ganyu bb :(( (Y/N)'s trailer music is much calmer than the demo so tnbee for example made a remix of it which has some of the nice dialogue mixed in, or someone made a 1 hour loop of the official stellar moment release. It's so effective that sometimes Ganyu really can't rest unless she's listening to it full blast.

Ah I love this, I love this all, this must be placed in both masterlists for everyone to see

[antiloreolympus]

7 Anti LO Asks

1. Do you know what really gets my blood boiling about this comic? Persephone and Demeter's relationship.

In the myths, Demeter and Persephone loved each other more than anything. Their reunion is so important - it marked the coming of spring and growth. A whole cult was dedicated to this for crying out loud. Yes, the myths were far from perfect, but the Persephone and Demeter myth showed the strength of a loving mother-daughter relationship with Demeter searching endlessly to find her child that was ripped away and had her innocence forcibly taken.

Now, RS is not the only author to make Demeter this over-bearing mother type in order to put more positivity onto the Hades-Persephone relationship. However, RS takes this trend to a whole new level - to the point where I would even consider it misogyny.

How is it, she takes this beautiful mother-daughter relationship and makes it out to be an abusive and controlling one, and then takes the Hades-Persephone relationship from a forceful one to a loving, perfect relationship with no problems? How is it ok to ruin one relationship to elevate another?

I understand that many versions of the myth try to downplay Hades' actions, and even make it so Persephone actually falls in love with him and there is no rape. But it doesn't change that this relationship was problematic, and meant to represent the loss of innocence.

Then fans have the gall to claim this comic is feminist and then claim on top of that that Demeter and Persephone's relationship was the same in the myth? These fans clearly don't know the myths, and neither does RS.

Making Hades a good person is fine. Changing it up a bit to make Persephone's loss of innocence something else is also fine. But ruining Demeter and Persephone's relationship? Especially when Persephone has to spend half the year with her? So horrible. 

2. im sorry, but rachel cant introduce KRONOS coming back and then dropping it for several episodes to focus on a stake-less trail and persephone not knowing what lingerie to seduce hades in. like thats too much of an earth shaking development and huge stake plot point to just ignore for months to focus instead on something as minor as hxp's relationship, which only points out a huge flaw: why is hxp's relationship so minor in this? isnt the whole point supposed to be about them?

3. I think LO completely dropped the ball over Hades’ characterization. 

From the first ep I thought ok, this is good, we have some bones to see he’s not that lucky in love and is just tired and lonely, and while ignoring the creepy actions towards Persephone, I thought ok, Artemis hates him, Hestia hates, even Ares hates him, maybe once Persephone finally sees the underworld and probably gets to know him it’ll be a clever twist and they’ll be proven wrong. The underworld will turn out to be fair and just, the citizens will love Hades, he’ll be revealed to be a good leader and king and not like his brothers, it’ll be like everyone saying Hades of myth isn’t actually that bad, and it’ll help reinforce why this sweet and bubbly Persephone wants him, she sees the real him, not the mean rumors and assumptions, this is perfect.

And then it just didn’t happen. The exact opposite happened, actually.

We’re shown the LO underworld is cruel and unjust, where the poor dead are forced into slavery and Hades created a harsh class divide with him and him only on top, the citizens hate him, the underworld gods don’t trust him and openly seem ok if he’s taken out of power, he’s not a good leader and king and doesn’t even want the job yet keeps it for his own ego and grip of power m, and on top of it all he is just like his brothers, if not worse. He loves to get violent over any little slight against him, he hoards wealth and resources to enrich himself while his citizens starve and struggle to survive, he’s corrupt, he controls all the media and laws to bend to his will, sleeps with his brothers wife for centuries behind his back while claiming to be holier than thou, he has sex with his secretaries who are made dependent on him for any way to survive, and now he lusts after his barely legal intern who is also now dependent on him for her way to survive, and that’s only what I remember off the top of my head.

LO perfectly set up to prove Hades isn’t the devil or the false pop culture assumption that he’s evil and to show some actual facts from myth, and yet Rachel only ended up reinforcing exactly that and even making him even worse with her made up ideas, all while thinking having Persephone ignore or excuse it somehow makes it not bad or even a good thing. It’s honestly kind of impressive just how bad of writing that actually is. 

4. Chapter 172 is not that interesting. It’s setup had me excited to see Hephaestus and Hera and learning more about echo, but it’s cut so short. Because again the story can’t leave HXP out for 2 seconds.

I can also see why Zeus is gonna go insane. 

5. i agree w/ other anon. LO should have pulled a PJO or a BoZ and just made up OCs and have them interact with the gods than whatever Rachel thinks shes doing, which is lying she's being accurate and faithful while completely changing all of it, removing what is needed, and adding what isnt so that it lines up with no actual myth besides like, various 50 shades fanfic she read in 2015 and some popular tumblr text posts.

6 . the animation studio behind blood of zeus literally can only draw one face for the men and one face for the women and they were still able to make the gods all look distinct and hot while LO can't even bother to use more than 6 colors and can only have the women look as tiny as possible with the biggest boobs while the men are all just lego men.

7. ////FP SPOILERS////

Okay so like I stopped reading LO way back before season 1 ended, and a majority of my knowledge of the series comes from what I read here on your blog which is enough for me lol and I decided to read the latest 5 chapters just to see what's up (on zahard. I refuse to give the actual series any views)

And I just. Could not take the whole scene with Daphne running from Apollo seriously? The anatomy and art inconsistency was so distracting that i genuinely could not find it serious. Even when Thanatos discovers her hibernated body I couldn't take it seriously because of how she looked?

And when Hades had that call (??? Was it a call? Or his inner dialogue? I couldn't really tell ngl) with Zeus and said he's causing Persephone unnecessary distress, and that she didn't pose any threat. B!tch??? She killed a ton of mortals??? She has no control over her powers???? She's literally a fugitive for the aforementioned things??? She apparently woke Kronos up? (Idk if anyone knows about that, again my knowledge only spans to whatever I read here) Hello????

And I have a lot to say about the chapters starting the trial but I'll only mention one thing; Hades saying "I don't think blindly supporting my little brother would be doing him any favours (as a ruler)" had me cackling. This is coming from a guy blindly supporting a girl he's literally only known for a few weeks, who's like what, only recently turned 20? Sit tf down Hades you're not cool, you creepy ass overgrown smurf.

Overall I still hate this series lmao. Regarding art though I feel like I wouldn't be so miffed about the anatomy much if the character designs were consistent and the story was compelling. They literally change hairstyles and body types frame by frame, and it's distracting.

The timeline from what I read here is laughable. 4 years in publication with almost 200 chapters and you're telling me only like a month has passed canonically. That's wild and such poor writing.

And as someone who literally will sympathise with any lead character pretty quickly, the story makes me hate them. It makes me want to root against them. I also hate the fact this trash is somehow top ranked on webtoons when so many other stories are far better then it.

Anyway, many thanks to this blog for existing and allowing me to dump so much text here to vent out my hate for this series lmao. You the mvp fam, hope you're having a good day 🥂🥂🥂

[opalescient]

haikyuu fic recs — the most beautiful, lovely, breathtaking masterlist (vol. I)

so i’ve been binging fics to cure my sadness, and i thought that these select masterpieces were too magnificent to not be plastered on every billboard ever. some tore my soul into shreds, while others melted said shreds back whole, but all of them made me feel some form of sheer, unadulterated love, so. please enjoy! 🥰⛅️✨

note: all of these fics are exquisite and you should read all of them, but if you’re short of time, those with ☆ are my all-time favourites!

daisuga

butterfly in the subway by bigspoonnoya ☆ | T

Sugawara Koushi has no idea he's already in love with the man he's supposed to hate.

i lovelovelove how all the concepts tied in together like a perfectly wrapped gift

also very wholesome, made me feel so inexplicably warm. like, love can exist everywhere!!! despite everything!!! that’s just so inspiring

i revisited this many times, i think it was (one of) my first haikyuu fics and honestly. it set the bar so high and i have no regrets

you’d fit my lonely arms so perfectly by boxofwonder ☆ | G

“Oh. You're. Not Asahi.”

Calmed down enough that he can speak again, Daichi takes a deep breath, his smile settling on his face easily and wide.

“Not as far as I know, no.”

-

Suga accidentally calls a stranger instead of his best friend, tells him all about his burned batch of cookies before realising, and that particular mistake might turn out the best one he ever made.

major, major fluff

the buildup!!!

god this made my yearning for love so much worse

the perfect stranger by downmoon | T

There’s a man standing outside Suga's door.

Scratch that. Start over.

There’s a man he doesn’t know standing outside his door, holding his sleeping nephew in one arm, with another kid clinging tightly to his free hand.

so domestic please read the entire series from start to finish it has my whole heart

shoyou and tobio as their actual kids 🥺

these two parents are so in love it makes me wanna cry

asanoya

silica sand by lilien passe ☆ | G

Overworked, over-stressed programmer Azumane Asahi works on the top floor of a Shinjuku skyscraper. Nervous around his coworkers and terrified of the long drop on the other side of the window, Asahi falls into a miserable routine, only to have it broken one day by a simple message on the outside of the glass.

PLEASE. so well-written it makes my heart glow and ache simultaneously

made me ascend into asanoya heaven

such a brilliantly unique concept i love it A+

qué syrah syrah by loudlucy | M

Asahi wants to be a Master Sommelier. It's the highest honor in wine service, and the certification would allow him to live the life he's always envisioned for himself. Too bad the certification test is notorious for being the world's most difficult.

Most people fail their first time taking the exam, and Asahi is no exception, but he has more difficulty than most dusting himself off and getting back on his feet. Enter Nishinoya, a young man who shares his same dream, and who believes in their goals so fiercely it forces Asahi to embark on a delicious and sensuous journey of viticulture and validation.

AKA The Wine Tasting AU that literally no one even knew to ask for.

NOTE: You Do Not Need to Know About Wine to Understand This Fic!

another super unique concept!!! (´∀｀=)

my god their chemistry is amazing

the writing made me feel things ngl

stop my bones from wondering by cerasi ☆ | T

After graduation, Asahi hides from the world and needs help from a few sources to find his way back.

i want to write sonnets and sing ballads for this fic, it’s that beautiful

as always, Top Notch Writing *chef’s kiss*

no but i seriously... can i kiss the author? asking for a friend 😳👉🏼👈🏼

iwaoi

star-crossed by starlitcities | T

“I never thought I’d see the day that I’d envy a human,” Oikawa admits, showering himself in tiny suns, because he can actually feels those, like a fusillade of warm kisses on luminous skin that leave marks. To humans, they’d be freckles. Skin stars, Oikawa calls them. He didn’t make that up, a human did.

“Who created the rule that we can’t touch, I wonder,” Iwaizumi ponders, floating heedlessly through space.

“Maybe it’s because we can fly. Humans dream of flying, right?”

“I don’t think so.”

gsjsgsjshsjshsjsj star!iwaoi

they’re LITERALLY STARS

beautifulbeautifulbeautiful i love how the author conveyed the beauty of touch and humanity 🥺🥺

please bless yourself further with the sequel sun-kissed

conquering the great king by suggestivescribe ☆| E

Iwaizumi blinked his gaze over to Oikawa, "Last time was supposed to be a one time thing," he said, voice low, lacking some conviction.

Oikawa's lips twitched into a smirk and he brought them hovering just over Iwaizumi's, "One time thing, Two time thing, what's it matter as long as it's not a Relationship thing?"

yes.

in fact, this entire series (breaking the rules) features daisuga, kuroken, asanoya and it’s SO GOOD. every single one.

but anyway, character development!!!!! plot!!!!!!!!! writing!!!!!!!! i’m here for it all

tsukkiyama

campfire in your chest by deanpendragon ☆ | M

Kei realizes in their second year of high school that he’s probably been in love with Yamaguchi since they were ten. However hopeless he might be in handling that situation, Kei prays he’s at least not as hopeless as Hinata and Kageyama. But he just might be.

SO BEAUTIFUL

i am also a sucker for anything with stars, moons and all the love in between

no words to describe this work of art please just go read it and be blessed

under the lilac tree by raewrites | G

there’s a lilac tree in Kei’s backyard.

gorgeous in its simplicity

softtsukkisofttsukkisofttsukki

not as grandiose as the rest but the love written into every word, action and character is absolutely show-stopping

kagehina

saffron and cayenne pepper by dontsaycrazy ☆ | T

Cooking is hard. Even if you have your very attractive, very grumpy neighbor there to help you.

-

In which Hinata's lack of cooking skills are a danger to him and others. Luckily (or not), Kageyama is willing to teach him, if only for the sake of avoiding any burned down apartments.

the essence of their characters were captured so well and yet it’s like they’re completely new characters too? author, whoever you are, you totally owned this

this made me ship kagehina so hard

fluff! cuteness! lots and lots of cooing!

kuroken

the galaxy is endless (i thought we were, too) by cosmogony ☆ | T

soulmate

/ˈs��ʊlmeɪt/ • noun

A person who was made from the same star as you.

-

// Kuroken AU where the last words your soulmate will say to you appear on your skin when you turn 16, and how Kenma and Kuroo learn what this means over the course of their lives.

ahhh here it is. beautiful, heartbreaking, soul-emptying agony. you want angst? choke on this, and your tears later on.

no but seriously please read this if you haven’t you won’t regret it at all i promise

written from kenma’s perspective so you experience every depth and multitude of emotion he does and it’s so raw and- brb imma go cry for a sec

knot in my heart by hearthope | T

There’s a picture. Kenma blinks, looking at the little calico cat, being held up next to the face of a guy with stupidly messy hair and a crooked grin.

Cute.

The— the cat. The cat is cute.

Just the cat.

-

Kuroo starts spending a lot of time at the flower shop Kenma works at. Kenma definitely isn't into him.

okay so i like it when authors unravel a normally stoic character’s full scope of emotion and give them depth, sue me.

anyway, back on the fluff train!

i absolutely f*ck with flower symbolisms, cats and bitchy best friends who have dirt on each other. the layers of romance, friendship and everything in between is so prettily developed 10/10

bokuaka

the jacket you never returned by daisuga ☆☆ | G

He leaned over, kissed Bokuto on the cheek, and smiled bitterly, eyes watery.

He will never remember. Not now, not ever.

What they were will now forever be forgotten.

-

"You used to call me Keiji, Koutarou."

YOU USED TO CALL ME KEIJI, KOUTAROU!!!!!!!!!!

i beg you to listen to Spiegel im Spiegel when it’s first mentioned in the story please

i read this and screamed through my tears for a solid 1.5 hours. i rarely cry.

no f*ckin regrets though i read this thrice already and it hurts so good every time

rules by conesofdunshire ☆☆ | E

In which Akaashi Keiji is an overworked accountant who stumbles upon Bokuto one night playing the piano in the lobby of his work. Bokuto is different, that much is obvious. But with such supreme musical talent and a smile so dazzling it rivals the sun, there's just something about him that brings Akaashi back every night.

this fic. this fic has my whole, broken, sobbing heart and laughing soul

gorgeous. breathtaking. magnificent.

bokuto is so WARM and akaashi is so STRONG and they both find the solace they need in each other and it’s all i want for me 😭😭😭

in another life by littleluxray | T

Sleeping didn't come as easy as it used to. Bokuto knew this, and now Akaashi did, too.

The hospital AU that no body asked for, but that I took upon myself to write.

this is a famous fic that i doubt any seasoned haikyuu reader wouldn’t know, and RIGHTLY SO BECAUSE, the PAIN. the pain. the pain.

i could feel my lungs shrivel up and my chest cave in on itself. fatigue and rest are things i struggle with too so this whole story resonated with me from start to finish, and it broke me. in like, the best, most revitalising way

i would read this again but it still haunts me at night. i need to heal from the first time before i have the guts to try one more time HAHAHA 😆💔😭

tea-stained polaroids by dalyeau | G

“I'm gonna date that,” Bokuto declares solemnly, and Kuroo throws a plastic spoon at his head.

mmmmmmm pretty photographer + personalised coffee cups + cute baristas = diabetic fluff fic

i smiled so much throughout this you have no idea. cheeks achey but so good

i may have squealed a little at the ending

kurotsukki

moonfall by batman | T

There is no unlearning Tetsurou, after all. There is only leaving him.

-

(Five things of Tetsurou's that ended up in Kei's home, and one that never left.)

the writing!!!!!! is pure beauty!!!! sheer grace!!!!!!! the construction of the AU and the romanticism and hsjsgsjshsj

didn’t cry but. heart ache and bittersweet smiles are another level of misery that is just as fulfilling

yea just pleasepleasepleaseplease go read it thank you and have a good day

hidden gem by realmSpinner | E

Things get complicated when everything you thought you knew about a guy changes, and they get even more complicated when you actually start liking those changes.

That guy working with you AND becoming your neighbor? That's just a cherry on top of the cake of confusion.

this AU was refreshingly different, and amazingly so

top!tsukki??? sign me the f*ck up

the whole plot, man. perfection.

pings by barfs ☆☆ | T

[5/02/16, 3:50:17 AM] Tsukishima Kei: Please wake up.

[5/02/16, 3:50:23 AM] Tsukishima Kei: I hate begging. You know I hate it.

[5/02/16, 3:50:34 AM] Tsukishima Kei: I bet you’re snickering at that, wherever you are.

[5/02/16, 3:50:53 AM] Tsukishima Kei: But, it keeps hurting and I don’t know why and it feels like shit and I know you could tell me why, but you’re not here and I would really appreciate it if you’d just wake up.

[5/02/16, 3:51:02 AM] Tsukishima Kei: You’re laughing at that too, aren’t you.

[5/02/16, 3:51:10 AM] Tsukishima Kei: Dying is probably up there in the list of top ten shitty things you’ve ever done, and you’ve done a lot of shitty things.

god.

you already know what’s coming, and yet. when it comes.

how the f*ck did the author make grief beautiful????????? (at the expense of me dying along with kei and everyone else i guess)

this fic will ruin you and bury you under all your pain (i hope you’re ready)

but also put you back together with the “sequel”

kyouhaba

close to the chest by darkmagicalgirl | T

It takes Yahaba thirteen years to realize he's different from the other kids, one to figure out how to hide it, and two more to learn to be happy just the way he is. Yahaba's journey ft. an extremely annoyed Kyoutani, best friend in the world Watari, and loads and loads of good senpai Oikawa.

cause i’m (not) alright with the slow, burn~

no fr, take slow and burn very seriously

overthinking yahaba? i understand. i do.

again, such an amazing fic; 10/10 recommend

safe here by crossbelladonna ☆ | M

“Raids are routine work,” Kyoutani tells to Yahaba before he can air the question. “Sometimes there is no sleep done until we accomplish something, say kill a certain ghoul. I guess they’re still going through the possibility that people in the accident are still alive huh?”

Yahaba quirks a smile, pushing his mask up his head.

“You’re alive.”

Kyoutani looks at him intently and all of the things that they’ve gone through for the past month seems to flash in his mind.

“Yes I am.”

i haven’t watched tokyo ghoul but i understood everything perfectly. such is the power of f*cking kickass writing

*cue ugly crying and a lot of unresolved angst*

like the grief??????? ruin me please thank you 🙏 (i think i’m a little masochistic)

rare pairs

mannequin men by surveycorpsjean ☆ | M

[bokuto/akaashi/kuroo/tuskishima]

The modelling world is full of hungry wolves, constantly clambering over the other, snarling and desperate. They fight, and they kill, trampling over anything in their path.

In this case, Akaashi fell in love with the wolves.

i did not expect this to be good, and it wasn’t. it was SPLENDID.

akaashi is so enamoured with them from the get go i love it

a tiny bit of angst that stabbed me in the heart, but the happy ending soothed it (thankfully, because if there wasn’t one i will sue)

characterisation, writing, plot development; everything is great. can you tell i’m running out of synonyms for ‘beautiful’

feel like gold by heronfem ☆☆ | T

[bokuto/akaashi/kuroo/kenma]

In which Kenma is unapologetic and comfortable with who he is, Akaashi learns a lot about himself in a short period of time, Kuroo is wildly in love and an eternal survivor, and Bokuto remembers that love doesn't cure mental illness, but having a support system sure helps a lot.

Or, the one where 4 young men get together, and are helplessly, hopelessly, utterly in love despite everything.

e.e. cummings?? poetry??? f*ck yes

so beautiful. i’m so star-struck by this fic it’s simply stunning

there are no words to fully capture how worth your time and heart and mind reading this fic is so please. do yourself a favour, and fall in love with this fic with me

the sky and guilt are the only feelings i have left by oopsthisisqueertoo ☆☆ | not rated

[bokuto/akaashi/kuroo]

Akaashi is at his wits end. He feels nothing. He's quickly crumbling as a human being. He wants nothing but sweet release of death. In his fourth year of college he drafts a plan for his suicide. He is to graduate, publish writing for others to be inspired by, and slip quietly away. Shortly after, he meets a dog walker named Bokuto who asks him out and Akaashi reluctantly agrees. Nothing matters anymore and he treats Bokuto like an obligation. Until he's not anymore.

TW: SUICIDE ATTEMPTS & DEPRESSION

this was... this gutted me entirely and filled my body with too many shades of agony

arguably one of the best haikyuu fics i’ve ever read

so beautiful in the most painful way fathomable; strongly recommend

april to may by surveycorpsjean | T

[bokuto/akaashi/kuroo/tsukishima]

They're an odd family.

The four of them? Parents?

But still, they're a family.

So they'll support each other until the end.

aaahhhhh third gym as parents 🥺

so much fluff. i also love april and may

they’re still so in love there’s love in every millimetre of this fic :”)

that’s it for now! i’ll add more if i come across anymore good fics. i hope you enjoyed this list! if you have any requests/fic recs, or if u just wanna chat, feel free to just ask! hehe 🥰 k aight bye~

[crossroadsandloudmusic]

HELLO! HI!!!

I’d love a match up from you and here is my description:

My name is Kloey, I’m 18 and female. My pronouns are she/they and I am Omnisexual. My favorite food is shrimp tempura and my favorite color is pale blue. I love to draw, play musical instruments (drums, ukulele, and violin) and i really love to cook. I’m a huge music and art enthusiast. I am kinda strange I suppose, sometimes I can be extremely loud and hyper (bouncing off the walls hyper) and then the next I’m quiet and very shy. I do have social anxiety and I tend to get nervous when put on the spot. I am extremely protective and I’m kinda blunt sometimes. I’m very physically affectionate and I can be quite mean when others hurt the people I care about. I love everything, I love people, I love animals, food, big things, small things. I have short brown hair cut into a wolf cut, with pale skin, freckles and blue eyes. I also have a septum piercing. I’m about 5’3. My favorite characters are Rengoku Kyoujurou and Muichirou Tokitou (or Genya).

Thank you so much!!

Omg you sound so fun! I love your profile pic btw, Kyojuro has me forever, I SET MY HEART ABLAZE FOR YOU BBY! Ngl tho, Why Are All Of Y’all So Damn Interesting, YALL ALL GOT COOL HOBBIES AND PERSONALITY LIKE COME ON BRO IM STRUGGLING OUT HERE! ok that was a lot let me shut up and get started

Let’s play the Game!

These are the results of the Matchmaker’s assessments:

Kyojuro Rengoku: I’m sure this comes to no surprise to you, but can you blame me? At 90% I see the you are most compatible with Mr. Flame pillar himself! I mean who else would be your number 1? You two have WAY too much in common to not to be compatible. Allow me to explain, let’s start at the very beginning. You both have names that start with K. (I could see the two of you getting matching necklaces with the letter K on them). Shrimp tempura. Now I know that this isn’t your both favorite food, but because it is your favorite, it is now Kyojuro’s. (Let’s be entirely honest, take a look at Kyojuro, LOOK AT HIM, you mean to tell me this man gonna go hungry? Nope, not at all, absolutely not. He is not picky by no means). Not too mention you love to cook? Umm, are you gonna be ok? Because I’m a hundred percent positive the Kyojuro is gonna try to marry you instantly. The two of you have insanely similar personalities, your both blunt, passionate, caring, loving, protective. (SAVE SOME GOOD QUALITIES FOR THE REST OF US jk you are amazing!). But seriously though, you two are a match made in heaven. Kyojuro absolutely adores your talents and would absolutely support you too the fullest extent. If you draw him pictures he will keep every single one, he keeps his favorite with him at all times and shows it to anyone who will look. Literally is the proudest of you. Loves to listen to you play your music too, sometimes it can be the only thing that’ll help him sleep. On missions, he will listen to memories of you playing. Ok but on a weirder note I think he would be utterly fascinated by your piercing, has poked it before, will poke it again. In the end I think the two of you belong together, you absolutely match perfectly!

Giyu Tomioka: Alright, I know this is a bit of curve ball, buttttttt here we go. Sometimes opposites attract and not saying that Giyu and Kyojuro are exact opposites but there is definitely significant difference. Which is why at 10% I found you compatible with Giyu. Giyu is much more quiet than Kyojuro, so he will be there with you when you are anxious or feel shy. He enjoys your rambunctious personality, thinks it adorable especially when you get excited about something. Loves to admire your art work, he may not seem like he does but I can promise you he treasures your drawings. Especially the ones you drew from him, keeps them all folded up nicely and tucked in a pocket close to his chest. When he is out on missions he will take them out and look at them when he gets lonely. At home he will oftentimes be standing and looking at your work carefully, on the inside he is singing your praises of your creativeness. Giyu doesn’t strike me a the type of man to have rhythm, NOT saying he doesn’t but all I’m saying is that I’ve never seen him cut a rug. The point I’m trying to make is that when giyu hears you play he wouldn’t jump up and start dancing, instead he would listen very carefully and patiently. He enjoys your music more than you’ll ever probably know, but he does show his appreciation. After you get done playing he will kiss your forehead, later that evening he’d hum the tune you were playing. Taps his foot every know and again while you are playing. Most of all though, I think Giyuu would admire you to the fullest extent. You are dedicated, talented, caring, loving, you are the things Giyuu wants to become. He looks up to in every way. To him you are North Star guiding him through the vast open sea.

Honorable mentions: Uzui Tengen!

Thank you so so so much for your submission! You seem like such an amazing person, I wish I had the talent you had! I can’t play an instrument to save my life! You are talented, caring, and amazing! Thank you again!

Thank you for playing!

[nctsjiho]

Alternate Universe

warnings: mention of COVID. This is was meant to be pure fluff ngl, but you might’ve guessed it, that’s not how it turned out.

era: May 2021

❀ During a sleepover in JiHo’s new apartment, she and Renjun imagine how life would be if NCT never met each other

“Okay, but with space being infinitely big, who says there can’t be multiple universes. And maybe, one of those universes could be an alternate universe similar to ours.” JiHo hummed as she listened to Renjun’s rant - which had been going on for about 30 minutes at this point. She pulled her blanket up to her chin and closed her eyes. “Do you think we’d still have met in that universe? Do you think NCT exists there?”

JiHo let out a deep sigh, “Go to sleep Renjun, it’s already past 1.” She turned her head to look at Renjun who was slightly pouting and she let out a small chuckle. “I just wonder how things would’ve been if we hadn’t met each other.” Renjun then locked eyes with the girl. “Any of us.”

Sitting up straight against the arm rest of her new L-shaped couch, JiHo stretched her arms. Renjun mirrored her action on the other end of the couch, curious as to why JiHo did so, she had been nagging him to shut up and sleep earlier anyway.

“As for me...” She trailed off. Renjun took notice of how JiHo’s eyes had focused on nothing particular. Even in the dimly lit room he could see how her eyes looked so bright yet charming. He never told anyone, but JiHo’s greenish eyes were one of his favourite things to look at. They were so pretty and interesting. Not only was she the only member who didn’t have just brown eyes, but something about them had him get lost in her eyes whenever he got the chance to look at them closely.

JiHo coughed before continuing. “I’d be in France right now. Probably had a reckless childhood with my weird friends and helping out at my grandparents’ pension.” Even though Renjun felt sad that he wasn’t part of that alternate-universe-childhood, he couldn’t help but smile when JiHo did. Reminiscing the childhood she had and imagining how it would’ve continued if she’d never gone to Korea to become an idol made her feel nostalgic in a sense. She didn’t get to experience it, but she could imagine it as if it really happened.

“I’d probably have a dog and live a normal middle-class, country side, family and friends oriented life. Maybe continued on with rope skipping and actually go semi-professional.” She contently sighed. “What about you?” JiHo’s eyes fell on Renjun’s shadowy figure. The light coming from the window only hit the far side of his body, so JiHo couldn’t really make out much of his appearance.

“I don’t know. I actually don’t know.” JiHo laughed softly. “Oh, don’t tell me you theorised about aliens, alternate universes, ghost, any kind of supernatural, but you’ve never thought about life without NCT?” Her mocking, yet innocently playful tone elicited a chuckle from him. “I guess I would’ve went on with school and worked hard to get into a good university so I could get a good job.”

“And your art? You’re really talented, you could do something with that.” The unexpected compliment casted a pink tinge on Renjun’s cheeks and he was so happy JiHo couldn’t make it out in the darkness of the room. “Hm. Maybe.” He hummed bashfully.

The two sit in silence for a bit before Renjun speaks up again. “How is it living here?” The sudden break in silence makes JiHo jump the tinniest bit and her head quickly turns to face Renjun. He laughs. “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.”

His eyes scan the room, or at least what he can see of it. He already got used to the dark, so he could the silhouettes of all the furniture in the spacious apartment. The living room, kitchen and dining era was bigger than those in most of the NCT dorms, but this apartment only had 2 bedrooms, a bathroom, a toilet and a small dressing room - it might as well just be a closet. It looked way more trendy than his dorm. “Esteem must have some good money.” He thought.

“It looks nice.” He then looked at JiHo, awaiting her response. “It looks nice yeah.” Her voice sounded way less chipper than it did before. “Why? Do you not like it?” Once again, JiHo’s head snaps up. “No, I do like it. It’s pretty big, not too much furniture so it’s easy to clean. My bedroom is big enough for a queen size bed. It’s nice.” “You don’t seem too happy about it though.”

Jiho sighed and let her body fall back down in a lying position on the couch. “It’s lonely.” She stated simply. No other explanation, just those two words. “What about your manager?” Renjun asked, but then he remembered. He, and no one of the other members who have visited her over the past two weeks had really seen her manager. Maybe one or twice in passing, but the manager wasn’t in the apartment for more than an hour whenever they came over.

A groan escaped the sleepy girl’s lips as she stretched her arms out in front of her. “She’s still managing for another talent under Esteem. And that person has a lot of schedules currently, so my manager is just out working all the time.” “But we come by often, and you come over to the dorms as well.” JiHo nodded, not necessarily for Renjun to see, she didn’t think he would either way, but he did. “So?” “It’s only the second time someone stayed over here. Which I really enjoy by the way.” She quickly added as not to offend Renjun because of her rather gloomy tone.

“It’s just that whenever I come back home, whether it’s from the company or from your guys’ dorms, I just get hit by the fact that I’m alone in this apartment.” Renjun sympathised with the girl, understanding why it could make her feel lonely. “Not only that, it also makes me realise that NCT really is all I have. I don’t have many other friends, or at least not those who I hang out with. It’s only you guys.”

Not wanting to face Renjun, whether he was able to see the disheartened look on her face or not, JiHo pulled her blanket up to her chin again. “My family lives about 12 plus hours away by plane. I haven’t seen them in six years, and quite frankly, I’m not sure when I get to see them again.”

Renjun felt his stomach sink a little as JiHo slowly lost her ability to hide her real feelings. Each word sounded more and more painful to utter, sounded like it took more energy, it just felt so sad.

In an attempt to cheer JiHo up, Renjun spoke up. “Hey, once COVID is over, you should just get on a plane and visit them.” JiHo let out a bitter laugh and it makes Renjun’s heart clench. Did he say something wrong?

“You don’t think that in those six years I could’ve just gotten on a plane and visited them?” JiHo asked, her tone sounding just as, if not more bitter then her laugh just a second earlier. “Don’t you think that my family could’ve just jumped on a plane and visited me?” She scoffed. Of course it wasn’t directed to Renjun, rather the situation itself, but the boy couldn’t help but feel a bit targeted. He didn’t blame her though, it must of been so frustrating for her.

“Do you mind me asking why it didn’t happen then?” JiHo looked at Renjun, who had pushed himself up further on the couch, his legs now crossed in front of him. “There’s literally no reason it didn’t happen before. It doesn’t make sense that I never went back or that my family never came here. It’s just like this.” “But- How?” Renjun felt so confused, it really didn’t make sense.

JiHo sat up as well and stared out in front of her at the window. “Whenever I wanted to go SM or the managers always made up some excuse. It was either schedule conflict, or I had problems with my visa in my trainee days, or I had a last minute meeting. SM never let me buy my family plane tickets and whenever they would tell me they’d come visit, they would always cancel last minute for something that happened. After a while I just stopped asking.” Renjun carefully stood up after JiHo’s confession. “And after a while, my family stopped planning to come.”

It went unnoticed by JiHo that Renjun had moved over towards her. She looked to the side to see her friend already sit next to her on the couch. “I didn’t know. I’m so so sorry.” JiHo shook her head. “It’s not your fault.” She responded, a silence fell over them once again.

Renjun watched as the gears inside of Jiho’s head kept turning. He felt so bad for everything she had to go through is silence. Everything she hid from everyone. All of it was just extra weight in her backpack full of worries and burdens.

He grabbed her hand which had fallen limply next to her lap. The touch making her snap out of her thoughts. “It just doesn’t make any sense.” She kept shaking her head. “Someone inside of SM must have been talking to my family, or maybe they felt betrayed when I left to Korea-” “Never.” Renjun interrupted, not wanting JiHo to even entertain that thought. “Maybe they got mad that I kept cancelling my visits.” Her head still continued shaking from left to right as if she was in denial, and to be honest she was. “Make it make sense Renjun.” Her voice cracked as her eyes locked with Renjun’s.

The same eyes that seemed to light up the dark room earlier felt devoid from all it’s usual brightness and youthfulness. On most days the green in her eyes reminded Renjun of jade, cool and charming, on other days it reminded him of nature, energetic and playful, but right now the green was so dull and was barely visible between the brown colour of the rest of her irises.

Renjun squeezed JiHo’s hand lightly. “I’m so sorry JiHo, I don’t know.” This causes JiHo to nod and let her eyes wander back to the window. “If I could I’d move back in with Haechan and the boys.” Renjun’s eyes stayed focussed on JiHo’s hand. It made him happy that her dainty fingers fit perfectly interlaced with his. The boy was used to holding for example Jisung’s hand, which was way bigger than his own and even though they fit into his as well, it was a different kind of fit. With JiHo’s hand he felt a sense of protectiveness and responsibility, like he had to be the one to make sure JiHo wouldn’t get hurt.

“Chenle doesn’t live with you guys, but at least when he goes home he has his family. Whether it’s his parents or his aunt, he has family with him all the time. As for me...” She trailed off. “This place doesn’t feel like a home at all. I was perfectly happy living with the boys. You guys are all the family I have here.” JiHo released a big breath as if she had just done a physical exercise that required a lot of energy.

Her eyes then fell onto Renjun and her intertwined hands, smiling at the way Renjun absentmindedly drew hearts on the back of her hand. “I love my parents and grandparents. I really do.” Renjun got startled by JiHo’s desperate tone, as if she was trying to prove him of her love for her family. “I know-” “I would like to believe I’d do anything to see them.” “And you would.” Renjun smiled assuring, even if his smile showed sadness. “I don’t think that’s true Renjun.”

JiHo’s breath hitched for a second before she made eye contact with her worried friend. “I could’ve just went. I could’ve not listened to SM and went. If I truly loved my family as much-” “Don’t say that JiHo.” Renjun scolded carefully, but JiHo just shook her head. “If I loved them so much, wouldn’t I have done it? I got on a plane to China for Xiaojun behind our managers back once for God’s sake.” She took a few seconds to calm her breathing. “Why haven’t I gone and visited my family?”

“You’re scared.” JiHo’s eyes widened in confusion. “What?” “You’re scared aren’t you? That going back might not be what you imagined it to be. But why does that matter? It’s your family, they love you and miss you just as much as you love and miss them.”

A wave of realisation hit JiHo and she felt tears well up in her eyes. Throwing her head back she tried her best to stop them from flowing and from more forming in her eyes.

Once the tears subsided she looked at Renjun who had a soft smile on his lips. “I’m scared that if I go back, that I’ll realise how much I actually missed my family.” Renjun laughed slightly amused. “What’s wrong with that?” “If I go...” She started and Renjun nodded along with her words, yet his smile faded as soon as JiHo uttered her next words.

“I might realise I don’t want to come back here again.”

---

Side Note: I wanted to write for Renjun for soooo long! This was based on a cute/funny prompt I found on Tumblr, but literally a few paragraphs in and my mind went “let’s make it a bit angsty”. This might be one, if not my favourite writing I’ve done so far <3 I hope you all liked it as well.

I know my content hasn’t been as good lately so I hope this writing will get me back on track a bit. I definitely have to do something about my inability to think of good titles tho O.O

I hope you have a nice day/evening/night <3

[anxiety-trademark]

A ranking/review of Dancing with the Devil... the Art of Starting Over that absolutely nobody asked for

Met Him Last Night ft. Ariana Grande - If you removed Ariana Grande's vocals from the track, I'd still ask if she had a hand in creating the song lol. Love the organ. Harmonies and tones are gorgeous. Deserves to chart well.

Dancing with the Devil - it really is the perfect Demi Lovato song imo, even if I still don't think it's a song made for radio. It’s untouchable as a solo song though. The production, the lyrics, the build, the soul. Flawless.

The Kind of Lover I Am - a 90s vibe that strongly reminds me of Miley tbh. The ending monologue is just terrific.

Carefully - A mesh of Alanis Morissette and Avril Lavigne's first 2 albums.

Melon Cake - Katy Perry’s Teenage Dream era meets Gwen Stefani. Where’s the complaint? I don’t see it.

Lonely People - this has a mid 2000s sound. Feels like a callback to her first album but like 10x better. If I asked Demi to write “Don’t Forget” in 2021, this is what I’d get.

My Girlfriends are My Boyfriend ft. Saweetie - the mixing and composition to this is fucking great. Love Demi’s flow in particularly the chorus; quite possibly the best chorus on the entire album. 

Easy ft. Noah Cyrus - very fond of the instrumentals. It’s just pretty. Makes me want an actual collab with Miley though ngl.

Anyone - it's jarring how much better the Grammy's version is, she really perfected that song before she took the stage.

Butterfly - I admire Demi for dedicating at least one song to her father on every album. This might be my favorite behind For the Love of a Daughter (both versions)

California Sober - love the country feel, it’s nice as a rarity. She really does nail every genre. Also as someone who’s “California sober” I love these lyrics.

The Art of Starting Over - a 70s vibe I fucking adore. This the Stevie Nicks sound I heard about. The ranking seems low but the first 12 songs on this list are really good.

What Other People Say ft. Sam Fischer - as someone who wasn’t a huge fan of the single release, this had a cohesive placement and sound, and I’m glad it was included.

The Way You Don’t Look at Me - this song is really sad and I don’t think the instrumental track does it justice, but it’s still really good.

15 Minutes - lol Demi really called him a famewhore and mocked him crying/praying in Malibu. Amazing.

Good Place - can’t think of a more fitting song to end this album with since I Love Me wasn’t included in the standard release.

ICU - feels unfair to even rank this because it's truly touching and beautiful, but the likelihood of me playing this song on repeat is super low.

*I'm not ranking Mad World because there's too much nostalgia behind that song. Her version is exactly what I wanted from her though, so 10/10 for a cover.

Negative: Not a fan how the endings to some songs just abruptly drop off. I wish she'd play around with outros and fading out a little more. Medium: Aside from Anyone and Dancing with the Devil, she didn't deliver any iconic ballads, but she's forgiven because she's delivered like 2 dozen in the past. Also surprised she stepped back from creating a soul-centered album, but that’s not a complaint. Positive: the experimental sounds/production/composition, the utilization of instruments I've never heard in her music, and the manipulation of her voice in multiple songs are all really impressive components that I never expected to hear in this album. Pleasantly surprised. And Demi's right, the track order was very lyrically cohesive. Major props there.

Final thoughts: this is definitely my all-time favorite Demi Lovato album. The number of songs I can happily throw on repeat blows every other album out of the water. Helps there are so many songs lmao. Easy 8/10, props to the chill vibe.

[retvenkos]

“i am a little bit of everything i’ve seen in my life.”

requested

MY HEADCANONS FOR THE HYBRID HARRY POTTER HOUSES...

gryffindor/ravenclaw

if you’re in gryffindor you think you’re more “refined” than everyone else, and if you’re in ravenclaw you think everyone’s a stiff

this is the person with the braincell! let it be known that they have it, but refuse to use it

they have to be a little chaotic because they know what consequences are but disregard them

these people call themselves ambiverts but it really just means they won’t talk to you if they hate you

and i say that lovingly

okay, but if they do talk to you??? best people to talk with - they can hold an interesting conversation masterfully and it’s all because their enthusiasm is off the charts

let them ramble, it’s very endearing.

and physical touch is probably their love language so cuddle with them, too

they’re sci-fi and superhero nerds change my mind

now their loyalty is really interesting because gryffindors are really loyal where as a ravenclaws are individualistic and prioritize #1, so i feel like they are very much on guard

befriending is hard - they’ll keep you at bay until they are sure you can be trusted. and they won’t be made to feel bad about it either.

but once you are close to them,,,,, they would save you or die trying

their inside jokes are god tier

i don’t know how they do it other than they know how to make people laugh using the most unexpected methods and because it was such a weird experience, people are able to remember really well?

like, they could say “nutmeg” and everyone around you starts laughing, meanwhile you’re just ???

gryffinclaws are also really interesting because they don’t do well with conflict, but drama sort of gravitates toward them because let’s be real here, they can kind of be actively seeking it out, sometimes.

i mean, it’s usually to avoid having to deal with deeper emotions or even bigger problems, but sometimes they have a hand in their own suffering....

also, these people never study if they don’t like the class. they don’t. if they dislike the subject, they procrastinate with every fibre of their being.

but if it’s something they love, they are the first to get it done and will 100% do extra research and talk about it all the time.

they say they love both cats and dogs equally, and they actually mean it.

they are most likely concerned with wanting to change the world in some way - but they want it to be a tangible way that still allows for creativity and freedom

this is also the friend who stays up wayyyyyyy too late, and when you ask them what they’re doing, all they can say is “memes”

and they really do love memes - send them some. it’s their primary way of communicating

they love going out to get lunch and chatting with friends

food + people = love

they’ll even do it in their room! just bring bread and a good conversation - they can stay up for hours

also,,,, creativity and courage??? these are the people who actually have the confidence to publish their writing/art/whatever, and i admire that.

but writers block hits them so hard... i’m so sorry

okay, but if i understand the meme right, i’d give them wine aunt status.

gryffindor/hufflepuff:

these bastards

but i say that lovingly!

this is your meddling friend - that person that knows all and you can’t hide a secret from them to save your life.

and they seem to know everyone?????

they could ruin your life if they wanted to, but they are sweet uwu children and would never - in fact, they’re appalled you would even suggest it.

don’t let them hang out with gryffindor slytherins, no matter what. they will be corrupted and then it’s all over.

“but why are they bastards?” you ask. well,,,, if you’re acting surly or really don’t want to do a thing™ they will use their knowledge against you, prodding you in the direction you did not want to be going

of course, they only ever use this power when it’s for your greater good, but it’s annoying and invasive enough to grant them bastard status.

10/10 the mom friend.

even has the mom stare.

you know - the whole “you’re being irrational and you’re going to do this no matter how you hate it” stare

they have the  m o s t   energy and i honestly admire that

and they’re so hard working and dedicated that motivation isn’t a problem? it’s really just trying to get a solid, coherent thought that plagues them.

someone please get them a planner - they are constantly running late, but excited to be here!

100% have cottagecore vibes, or at least naturecore or adventurecore

point is, they want to be outside, doing things

they most likely want to make change in this world, but on a smaller level - with the people they care about, or the place they live

they really want to see what this world has to offer, but they are deathly afraid of being lonely

ngl, they probably get hurt by people a lot. they’re a little too trusting and go in a little too deep and when that other person leaves it does irrevocable damage.

it’s kind of like idealism and optimism, but at what cost?

100% smother their own feelings with a pillow and then preoccupy themself with the problems of others to not deal with their own

get them someone to talk to, please. they deserve it.

most likely they are an extrovert and surround themself with people so that they won’t have to feel loss as hard

spoiler alert: loss is always crushing.

gryffinpuffs believe in people - it’s their greatest gift and worst downfall

and they cannot live without them

do they have the braincell? sometimes. most of the time they share it and forget to ask for it back.

they probably like to do tangible things - like sculpture or knitting, baking, caring for plants....

something they can hold close

and if they read, they 100% finish books in one sitting. they just binge and it’s very iconic of them

probably a romantic, idk

they want a meet cute in real life and read all of the marriage fanfics

gryffindor/slytherin:

now these are the people who smile when you call them a bastard

and are most likely to be called a bastard unlovingly

at first glance they might be a little low on the empathy scales, but if you make it into their circle they would kill, die, and resurrect themself for you

BUT! all things come with a cost.

these are your friends with shifting loyalties. they are loyal until they feel your loyalty toward them fade, and they can and will shift against you for self preservation.

and they won’t feel bad about where their loyalties lie.

but please love them because if you really do believe in them they will feel it and it will rock their whole world

and if your feelings are strong, you’ll be surprised how quickly they can turn to you for guidance

if you haven’t noticed, this group is extremely intuitive - they can just sense what everyone feels about them

all that intuition... and quite a lot of tact

maybe it’s the cunning or the self preservation in them, but they can read a room really well - only bested by the hufflepuff/slytherin - and can sway everyone to their side

you want someone to give oddly accurate motivational speeches? this is the person you’re looking for!

slytherdors.... you either love them or you hate them

but no joke these are the people that the gryffinclaws and slytherclaws are constantly fighting - and the slytherdor is ready to throw hands at any given moment, someone pLEASE send a ravenpuff (huffleclaw?) to save them

if you wanted someone to embody teenage angst, HERE YOU GO!

it’s either that or they are extremely competitive and not afraid to call someone out

if there’s a dueling club, someone please put restraints on these children

as you can imagine, these people have a lot going on, and what they really need is just some quiet stability.

they need to see this world isn’t constantly out to get them.

they absolutely love music, so listen to songs with them! they have the best spotify playlists with the most obscure vibes, and it’s very aesthetically pleasing

also! listen to them in any group setting - they make the best, dry comments under their breath

if you laugh at them they will reach into the heavens and give you the moon and the stars

they really want the ~found family~ and definitely seek it out

they crave redemption arcs

they give me baby wolf vibes - they are wild killers, but they’re at that tender age where they’re still vvv similar to a puppy, when given affection

their slytherin side has tamed the impulsivity of a gryffindor, but the level of tactician a slytherdor is varies wildly. you never know what you’re going to get, and they are actually really good at covering it up

kind of like on those alignment charts where it’s like “looks like they could kill you but is a cinnamon roll” except it’s “seems competent, but is really an idiot”

they really need an animal companion, probably a cat or tarantula

the slytherdor probably doesn’t feign to study - they either do or they don’t and if that’s bad for their mental health then they’ll fight god himself

i get a lot of vibes of zuko screaming at the sky in that lightning storm, where he’s like, “come on, strike me! you’ve never held back before!”

maybe i’ve been a little negative, but uh,,,, their love language is sitting in the dark, holding hands and talking about the lamest part of their day

also, they hate meaningless endings to tv shows - they just want to see everyone be happy or die trying

ravenclaw/hufflepuff:

you mean the adjusted ravenclaw?

maybe that was mean, but what i really mean is that they are the most emotionally intelligent of all the ravenclaws

these ravenclaws know how to use conflict resolution skills, and they are very much needed in ravenclaw tower

they’ve been coaching the gryffindor/ravenclaws, but good luck maintaining their attention if they don’t want to listen

they also have patience! that means they get along well with slytherins.

even if they’re tired, they’re a good sport about it

light academia aesthetic, or just soft vibes in general.

they are probably the only artists with a coherent schedule that they keep up on, while still remembering to stay hydrated and function like a normal human being

they lowkey crave structure - the unexpected is not for them

riddles? those have a right and wrong answer - they absolutely hate it when the gryffindor/ravenclaws or ravenclaw/slytherins give an answer that is “technically” right

they probably don’t tell anyone, though

passive-aggression? yep. i can feel them seething from here.

like, they can solve minor problems and can get over bigger ones in time, but if it’s a huge slight, they are never going to let go

and it’s super palpable when they dislike you because they are so kind to everyone else

they probably have a passion for poetry but can’t seem to write any themself

definitely still keep a book of it hidden under their bed, though

and if they are good they vehemently deny it but continue to write anyway

the biggest thing they struggle with is knowing their direction in life - who do they want to be?

abstract thinking is an art form, and these ravenclaws ponder existence in the most intangible ways you’ve ever seen

10/10 lay on the ground and stare at the ceiling for like 3 hours straight

they can vary wildly on the introvert-extrovert scale, but they are never in the middle. extremes only.

you can get close to them out with acts of service - they give so much, please just treat them ONCE

they attach themself to so many people, though. even if they’re an introvert, you’d be surprised with their connections.

they’re so level headed and yet, they can feel so lost

kind of reminds me of 50′s moms who seem perfect on the outside but have existential crises while making a roast in heels

they don’t necessarily want to be “known” - they probably feel like that definition is changing all of the time, so it would scare them to put themself in a box

i guess they’re kind of free spirits - maybe more like the aunt who does yoga with baby goats and collects crystals and pretty shells

they are great at conflict resolution, yes, but don’t expect them to be your therapist (that’s the hufflepuff/slytherin)

they have absolutely no idea when it comes to deep feelings - they barely understand their own

probably paints, tbh, or at the very least loves to go to museums w/ really abstract art.

they actually have the braincell! they keep it a lot of the time and can be stingy with it.

they either wake up really early in the morning or stay up until the sun rises because it gives them “clarity” or something.

ravenclaw/slytherin:

they’re definitely the blunt friend who will just say things as they see them

yeah, tact is lost on them

they also love to claim that they “don’t need” people, so they butt heads with the hufflepuff/slytherin and the ravenclaw/hufflepuff a lot

they have quite a bit of stratagem up their sleeve, so people can be weary of them

their attitude does nothing to solve this, but it could also be that the slytherclaw has this idea that flattery gets them nowhere

they are so divisive in their individualism,,, good luck befriending them

but if you do befriend them, you have a powerful friend in your corner.

they are 100% that distant relative that you think hates you but you aren’t sure if that’s just the way they are

but let me tell you a secret,,,, their love language is words of affirmation and if you stroke their ego they’ll grow soft

while slytherclaws may not be very persuasive on their own, they actually work really well in teams. they know everyone’s strengths are are unafraid to take charge and tell people what needs to be done and how

they’re also really good at logical thinking, so you definitely want to be lab partners with this one

and schoolwork? they do it and they take good notes. a really great student

and their ambitions and competitiveness means they are unafraid to go far, and they will do it in style, too

this is the epitome of dark academia. 

and there is very little that is chaotic when it comes to them - the slytherclaw is an excellent planner

maybe they desire more out of life - they never feel like they are quite getting what they want

they are cynical, but they they have such high hopes for this world

when they are let down, they’re not surprised but disenchanted nonetheless

they ponder the meaning of the world and what this world could be far more than they ponder their own life

they tend to see a bigger, more sweeping picture

100% they love the odyssey and definitely think it’s better than the iliad

they adore high fantasy with every fibre of their being and can really get into period dramas

i would say that a gryffindor/ravenclaw would be a good friend for them - we all know a gryffinclaw can talk, and sometimes a slytherclaw just needs to hear someone else’s take on this world

and, of course, it helps when anyone shows appreciation

okay, but they love sweets - chocolate, liquorice, peppermint, caramel... it’s one of the few childish things they allow themself to have.

they are actually relatively quick to trust? the fastest slytherin, actually

they keep their group small, but they get vibes about people and once you show them loyalty they trust you entirely.

i suppose they guess you don’t have any games because they don’t have any

ooh, but if you betray them??? they are a mess, emotionally, and will not hesitate to lash out.

but they are caring in their own way, and will do little things like reminding you to drink water or bringing you toast if you haven’t eaten and it’s very sweet

hufflepuff/slytherin:

so i know we have this idea of the slytherin sweetheart, but a slytherpuff is so much more than that

one of their strongest traits is the intersection of ambition and hard work - they will not stop until they are the best (in their mind at least)

it’s almost a petty form of competition. a bit of schadenfreude when they win.

and everyone’s immediate thought is that a hufflepuff/slytherin would be the most trusting slytherins but no.

not even close.

slytherpuffs are guarded at first, while holding a secret soft spot for you in their heart. but they won’t act on it until they are 100% sure you won’t hurt them. they are suspicious, but really want to like people.

it takes a lot to break down their walls, but when you do they already have a steady foundation for your trust to grow on, and it’s the strongest thing in this world

because of this they can often come off as cold or distant, but once you’re in their circle, oh yeah. there’s the hufflepuff qualities you were searching for.

a good contender for the mom friend position, but they aren’t overt enough to be so.

they’re not getting into your business or being slightly invasive like real mom friends, but if you need advice or a hug,,,,, this is the friend to go to.

they’re like the nice aunt. vvv comforting, but only if sought out.

oh, they have the strongest moral code i have ever seen - it cannot be shaken or swayed.

but! it can often go against the rules, so you do have a bit of chaos working beneath the surface.

i 100% believe that their love language is quality time, and most of that can be spent quietly, just sitting in the other’s presence.

i feel like 90% of their conversations is hand gestures or subtle facial expressions, so it make take a while to be able to read them, but it also means they are soooo good at reading other people

seriously, if you need a therapist in the group, this is your person. they know people so well. their intuition is off the charts.

BUT ALSO,,,, their levels of introvertedness are sky high. i feel like this is a given, but they can be in your orbit for 5 months and speak to your twice and think that is a decent amount of exposure.

please get them an extrovert. they need the exposure.

sEcReTS??? this slytherin probably has some, but you have to be like at level 50 to unlock their tragic backstory

they also have academia vibes and do really well in school work, but whether or not it’s dark academia or light academia is disputed. maybe grey academia? (is that a thing?)

they struggle with wanting to be known and yet wanting to hide parts of themself they find unattractive or unwanted

probably feel like they’re pulled in too many directions and overthink their choices just a bit too much.

everyone knows they have the braincell, but whether or not they use it is unsure

it’s so easy for their friends to coax them, they probably give it to someone else and never ask for it back even though they should be in sole custody of it

AND FLUFF ENSUES. (i realize some of these are kind of aggressive, so... vibe check!)

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