#i think all in all i spent 2 or so hours on this

[hollowtones]

my month-late PAX West post (& a catalogue of some things I saw and did and bought in September / late August)

PAX West was very fun this year. It was my first ever PAX and it was my first convention at all in maybe a decade. Any excuse to see friends is a good one & I love hanging out with the RTVS crew whenever I have the time and money to travel. ^_^ I even got to see some friends I've never seen in person before!!! (Thank you to Jill and Evan for the "Petal Crash" pin & thank you to Taxi for stealing my name tag by accident.)

I am very shy, and I have very severe social anxiety that causes me a lot of problems in my day-to-day life, so I almost didn't go to the RTVS meetup. People there were very sweet, though, so I'm glad I did. It feels very heartening to have people come up to you and tell you what the things you've made have meant to them. It was very hard to not cry. LOL

If you stopped by to say hi, thank you very much. I've been thinking about it through all of September and smiling a lot about it. ^_^

The rest of this post is largely pics of things Puzz and I picked up for ourselves. (And a little bit of talking about some other things we did.) I thought it would be fun to catalogue them. I tend to be a little thrifty, so I got to splurge on my wife. LOL

These were mostly things we got for Puzz because I didn't want to worry about lugging things home in a suitcase. But she keeps telling me they're our things, which makes me smile every time I think about it. Some of the pins are for me. I'd like to put them on my backpack... Hopefully they don't fall off. Jackie and Dodogama are friends.

The "Chicory" bag is a bit of a funny story. Puzz and I saw the "Beastieball" booth in the corner of the indie section. Very fun demo. Very cute booth. They have cool merch! I thought I saw Lena Raine working the booth, and I got really shy & nervous about making a poor impression, so I just kind of hid behind my partner. (I wish I had said hi, in retrospect... but we live and we learn...) So we just kind of shuffle off to the merch desk and talk to a very nice man there while we pick up some things. I work up the guts to say that I really like these games and that they mean a lot to me!! The guy says, well thank you, that means a lot to me and the team. Wow! Real swell guy, I'm thinking to myself. A day or two later Puzz and I are out to lunch with some friends and I just suddenly go eyes wide & mouth agape because I put two and two together in my head and realize Oh holy shit that was Greg Lobanov wasn't it. LOL

Puzz found a cheap copy of "999: 9 Hours, 9 Persons, 9 Doors" for the DS at a retro game store's pop-up. They also had "A Bug's Life" for Game Boy Colour and a strategy guide for "Gex 3", both of which I wish I had picked up.

Mr. Basculin was a gift from Jake. Good news! Mr. Basculin is still alive.

This is all stuff that was given to me as gifts. (Aside from the con badges. They make you pay for those.) You've probably already seen the Bibi that Jake made me. "Chicken Run" was also from him. "Zapper" was from Puzz and the Gumby game (& the Bad Boe sticker) was from Scorpy. These games fuckin suck asshole!!!!!!!!! I'm obsessed with them & I'll cherish them forever. I also got a little rock and a human dog keychain.

I think Scorpy said a fan gave this to him at PAX East to pass to me eventually. I'm having a hard time reading the @ on it, but on the off-chance you see this: thank you so much. Every time I think about it I get a little teary-eyed. I want to get myself a little picture frame for it. (This is the first time someone's given me fanart like this before, and it made me very emotional. LOL)

Puzz and I only got 2-day passes for PAX, so we spent the rest of our time in Seattle hanging out with friends and seeing the sights. I don't feel like digging all the photos out right now, but we went to a really fucking nice jazz club (Dimitriou's Jazz Alley - great ambience, really good food, we saw Keiko Matsui live which was life-changing), we visited MoPOP (I hadn't been in years! It was alright! Puzz had some capital-t Thoughts about the whole place which was fun to listen to!), we rode the trains, I got a big bag of Dicks, we walked around downtown. There was this really nice coffee shop that I keep having dreams about, so I hope I can go back to Seattle soon. (Or at least eventually, next year.) Then we went to Portland for a day to say hi to a friend because the state was nearby.

Then we went back to Puzz's place in California. Then there was a major heatwave & a bunch of wildfires nearby... So we didn't have the chance to get out much in September. But that's okay. We've both been tired lately & I think we both badly needed some dedicated Not Doing Things time. It's just a shame that it was enforced by Dangerous Weather Conditions.

We got to visit some local friends and I got to try out more Bog-Standard Mediocre American Food. (Dunkin Donuts is just Tim Hortons. Olive Garden is kind of scary but the salad was really good and the breadsticks were fine. I had a middling hamburger from Jack In The Box tonight. Their milkshake was very good. I'm sure I'm forgetting others.) I went to a Macy's for the first time and the layout of the store made me have a panic attack. We went for nice walks and saw lots of nice critters and plants. I got to swim! I watched a mediocre PlayStation presentation! I turned 30 years old! Puzz took me to a very fancy and really nice Italian place for my birthday, in case you were worried that I was only eating garbage here. LOL

We got a lot of books.

Maybe too many. Also a Miles Davis vinyl for myself & some Gunpla as an early birthday gift for Puzz. And also the cookbook was a gift from family. But I'm very excited to tuck into more of these, hopefully soon. Some were for me and some were for Puzz but knowing us we're going to go "hey, I liked this one, you check it out" or "hey, I didn't like this one, but maybe you will" for a lot of them. I'm gonna start with "Annihilation" and the game essays book. ("House of Leaves" is a second copy for us, because my copy was originally Puzz's and I wanted them to be able to read it too.) I don't have room in my bags for much more than what I came here with, so we're gonna ship some of the books to each other when we're done reading.

It's been a very nice month... I feel very thankful to have a life full of love like this. I don't think I have anything else to add to this post! Thanks for reading.

[greenwitchfromthewoods]

nymph. [1/2] l General Marcus Acacius

Summary:  you have been with him for a long time, but he has never seen you

Warnings:  fluff, some nudity, battle flashbacks, not much going on, mythological figures treated in a simple way

A/N: quick shot. two part story. smut - definitely in the second part. I had a lot of pleasure writing this. I hope you will be gentle with me. your feedback is very important to me and I thank you for all the reblogs, comments and likes. 🖤 sorry for all the mistakes

"So this is the place you chose for your solitary travels... I wondered where you've been disappearing lately."

A shiver ran down your arms at the sound of a slightly amused and familiar voice. You quickly stood up from the bed and curtsied, lowering your gaze.

"My lady." You said quietly. "Please don't be angry with me. I didn't think you'd notice my absence."

"I see many things, my dear. But no, I'm not angry." She replied, you raised your gaze and looked into the beautiful and wise face of Minerva. The armor she was wearing gleamed gold, reflecting the trembling flames of the candles, and although she was leaning on a spear, the head of which looked menacing, her face was gentle and a bit pensive. "I'm rather intrigued by your choice. General Acacius, I didn't think he was the one stealing you from me."

You felt the warmth that crept up your neck and cheeks, you looked down again, and Minerva laughed quietly.

"I'm glad." she added after a moment. "He's one of my favorites. He has all the features I like so much. Although, he's still a mortal."

Your gaze wandered to the man sleeping in the bed. A white sheet wrapped around his hips, he slept on his stomach, and the strong muscles of his back were outlined under his sun-kissed skin. 

Dark, tousled hair, soft stubble on his face, and those plush lips, the General looked almost like one of the statues you saw in your lady's temples. This was how ordinary people imagined gods, and you, spending time with them, saw their features in this mortal. A delicate smile crept onto your lips.

"I like watching him." you said quietly "When he sleeps, when he plans the strategy for the next battle or when he just sits alone and simply thinks. Never before have any of them drawn me to them so much."

The goddess looked at you, clearly intrigued. "Never?" she repeated "You lived long before him and you will live long after his body turns to dust. So why him?"

You didn't know the answer to that question. And you had long since stopped asking yourself.

It was the sounds of joy at the victory that caught your attention and drew you to the place where you first saw General Marcus Acacius. Since you were a nymph of the goddess Minerva, ordinary mortals couldn't see you like that, so you easily made your way between the crowded soldiers and stood near the General. 

The rays of the sun reflected off the golden face of Medusa on his chest, and his face, although covered in battle dust and the blood of his opponent, glowed in the glory of victory. Your heart beat faster in your chest and you knew you wouldn't leave him again.

At first it was curiosity, just like the one children have inside them. You followed him, listened to his low and melodic voice, noticed how he sounded when he gave orders and how he talked to others. You learned the names of his direct subordinates, learned his customs, spent hours in the tent with his commanders listening to their discussions about strategy and the art of war.

You were like the wind that followed him wherever he went, but you also had to remember your duties. Then you returned to your mistress, the goddess Minerva, having previously thoroughly cleaned your hands and feet of the camp dust. You didn't think she saw all of this.

"I feel that this is my place, my lady." you spoke after a long moment of thought "I don't know why... Is it normal? Or right? I've heard people talk about fate, but I'm not one of them so I don't know if it applies to me too. My lady?"

You looked pleadingly at Minerva's wise face. You didn't know anyone else who could answer that question. However, she was staring at you with almost motherly tenderness and soon your name flowed from her lips like a sonorous melody.

"You know that he will die someday." she said, "People are mortal. They have their weaknesses, their bodies age. You have observed it for so many centuries, and despite everything you have become attached to one of them. It really surprises me, but I look at it with great pleasure."

You smiled at her, your eyes once again turning towards the sleeping man. "Can this be called love? Is this what people talk about and desire?"

"You have to see for yourself, my dear."

It was another night when he saw her face again. He almost got used to her presence, although he never really saw her for real. Or maybe? 

Marcus remembered exactly that one moment when he had the impression that he saw her face in reality, because until then she had visited him only in dreams. 

It was a cruel battle. The soldiers fought hard and fiercely. Hundreds of the fallen were lying on the ground, and shattered shields and swords were lying around them, useless for anything. 

He was dazed, he could still hear the pounding of his heart in his ears, his lungs were still fighting for every breath, but when he looked up he saw her. 

She was standing in the middle of it all, not very clear as if she was a remnant of fog. The rays breaking through the thick clouds illuminated her silhouette. He saw sadness and fear on her face as her eyes moved from one dead face to another. And then she looked straight at him, her lips moving as if she whispered his name. He wanted to say something, run to her even though his body was sore, but then he heard the terrifying shriek of crows, he blinked, and she disappeared.

Marcus rinsed his face with cold water and looked at his reflection in the mirror. He felt tired. He would rather fall back into a dream in which this wonderful woman accompanied him, than put on armor and go to a military review.

He felt tired of the constant war he was fighting. The Roman Empire was growing every day. More and more space, more and more people to feed. Meanwhile, the Emperor sat in Rome and reveled in the next ships and carts full of treasures that his generals sent to him. This was not how it should be.

"You carry so much on your shoulders, Marcus. Too much for one man."

You sat on his bed, looking at him with sympathy. You liked talking to Marcus, even though you knew he couldn't hear you. Over this long time, you got to know him so well that you were able to recognize what was bothering him. And lately, many things were turning in his head.

You bit your lip as you allowed yourself to admire his naked body. He was strong, well-built. With broad shoulders, a strong back and long legs. You saw that charming happy trail that led straight to his impressive manhood. Even as a nymph you could feel desire, and you certainly did, looking shamelessly at this man.

As soon as Marcus pulled on his tunic, one of the messengers entered the tent.

"General." he said, bowing his head. "A message from Rome. The Emperor orders you to return. He will welcome you to the city with all the honors befitting a victor."

Acacius took the sealed message from the man's hand and signaled him to leave. Rome seemed so distant to him. However, after so long, it was good to return to civilization again. Although he loved the army, its order and rules, he missed his bed and home. A home that was just walls, because years of war and wandering didn't give him the opportunity to create something more there.

You went up to him and rested your head on his shoulder to read the message brought by the messenger.

"Rome! It's exciting." You said with joy. "There will be triumphal processions and the sound of trumpets. Rose petals falling on you from the sky like rain from the clouds... You, people, love such splendor."

Your hand slowly slid his arm. You felt his skin under your fingers, the small bumps that were traces of the wounds he had sustained. But his warmth was what you liked the most. You could feel it, but you couldn't give it to him.

When he put on the armor, your fingers playfully moved over each element. You liked Medusa's golden face the most, you always felt sympathy and compassion for her. When the sword hung at his side, you moved away, then followed him like an obedient servant.

People always amused you a little. They didn't see you, nymphs, although sometimes they managed to catch your faint reflection. Then they told stories about your beauty and tempting shapes. You knew many stories, good and bad, about what happened to you, and even more of them were unknown to ordinary people.

You had the impression that Marcus had experienced it once. You were a little careless then. Death and destruction made your heart ache, it was enough for his eyes to capture your image. That was the first time you felt his gaze on you, for real. He wasn't looking through you, he wasn't looking over you, but at you. That scared you and you didn't come to see him for the next few days.

"General, the troops are ready for review." reported some captain whose name you couldn't remember.

"I got information today that we are going back to Rome." Marcus said as they walked together along the first row of men. "That's good, people should rest."

"And you will once again receive the honors worthy of a hero of the Empire." the captain smiled. "I even sympathize with you, these meetings in the Emperor's palace must be tiring."

"Sometimes I think that being here is less bothersome than there, Aurelius." Marcus sighed and rubbed his furrowed brows with his hand.

"Did you sleep badly?"

"I don't think so. Only one dream has been bothering me for weeks."

Aurelius looked at his friend carefully. "A good dream, I hope? Full of wine, music and beautiful women, eh?"

Marucs stifled a laugh. "Of course, my friend."

He was lying. You both knew it. For weeks, you had been a guest in his dreams, only the places changed. 

A meadow full of flowers, where a warm wind flowed calmly. Or the seashore, in the abyss of which the sun disappeared, leaving a blood-red hue in the sky. Sometimes it was a bed, but different from the one he fell asleep in.

And you? You were beautiful. Sometimes dressed in a loose toga, sometimes naked. But you always gazed at him with love, whispered tender words, told stories that he thought he had heard before. Maybe when he was a child...

There were nights when he felt your lips on his neck and chest, or your fingers moving through his hair. Then he woke up hard, feeling as if just a moment ago your hand had really caressed him.

He didn't want to tell anyone that he felt watched, because he didn't know how to explain it. However, this feeling was with him almost all the time. Or when he was still half asleep and had the impression that he felt the shadow of a body lying next to him. Was he starting to go crazy?

You spent another day with him. The tent Marcus occupied felt almost like home to you. You sat on the edge of his bathtub as he took a bath, shamelessly watching his naked body glisten in the candlelight.

"I want to see you... Once again..."

His quiet voice tore you from your reverie. You looked at his face. His eyes were closed. You could see the wrinkles around his eyes perfectly, his neck that was perfect for showering with kisses, his arms were spread out on the edges of the bathtub, and his lips moved again.

"I know you're here with me... I can't see you, but I can feel you."

You leaned over him. Your lips were a few inches apart. You could clearly see his long eyelashes, you could feel his breath on your lips.

"I would give everything for one tender look from you..."

You parted your lips slightly and brushed his. It wasn't even a kiss, just a brush. Less than an accidental touch. But Marcus sighed as if his prayers had been answered.

"I guess I should feel embarrassed catching you in such a situation."

A quiet squeal reached your ears. You turned around and put your finger to your lips, but you smiled.

"Shush! He's sleeping." You said reproachfully to the young girl standing in the dark corner of the tent.

She silently approached the bed and leaned over the General with curiosity as if he was some really interesting phenomenon. You sat astride Marcus' hips and for a few hours you had been staring at his sleeping face. He dreamed about you, about both of you. It was a good dream, you were watching over it. You wanted him to rest, so that he wouldn't worry about anything else.

"My Cyrus was younger than him." She stated after thinking for a while.

"And he was a shepherd of sheep!" you laughed, "He's a general."

"Both equally mortal."

Her words momentarily extinguished your smile. It was true. Death was equal for everyone.

"What are you doing here?" you asked to forget for a moment about the separation that awaited you someday. "I thought you didn't like military camps."

"Our lady sent me to you." your friend and sister in one smiled, her eyes sparkling. "But before I tell you her words, tell me, do you really love him?"

You looked again at Marcus' sleeping face. You knew this map by heart. Every gesture, grimace, look. You knew him.

"I've never known love before." you answered truthfully. "But I know I'd like to be able to feel it, you know. Once, for a few moments, he looked into my eyes. It was less than one breath, but I felt like never before... I would give anything to be able to feel it again."

A delicate hand rested on your shoulder. "You've been visiting his thoughts for so long that his heart is directed only towards you. Our lady sees that, and she's the wisest of us all."

"She must be laughing at me, right? Such simple desires and..."

"Don't say that." she interrupted you quickly. "Our lady never does such things. She loves you and Marcus. You both have a special place in her heart."

Your eyes filled with tears. "Thank you." you whispered quietly. "What message do you have for me, love?"

Your friend's face brightened and then she came closer to your ear. She whispered quietly, but you understood every word perfectly. 

"Our lady asks you to live. She wants you to truly live. To feel. To love. To desire. To be seen. Our lady will fulfill your request, sister. Let immortality leave you, leave the body of a nymph and become one of the mortals. Fulfill your destiny."

For a moment you lost your breath, and a strange and disturbing shiver ran through your entire body. You felt a coldness you had never felt before. You saw the face of your dearest sister before you, but it was different, like a cloud of very thick fog.

"We will create myths and sing songs about your love." she said smiling "And when I’m next to you, you will feel me.”

Her lips brushed your temple, and warm tears ran down your cheeks as you closed your eyelids. When you opened them, she was no longer next to you.

For a moment, you tried to understand what had happened. You felt your senses overloaded, everything around you suddenly sharpened and darkened.

And then you felt it. Warm and strong hands tightened tenderly on your thighs, squeezing them gently. A familiar voice rang in your ears like never before.

"You're here... I can finally see you."

☆☆☆

Thank you for your time.

taglist: @ashleyfilm

[ttjisung]

back 2 u 𝜗𝜚

p. jisung x fem!reader smau

in which jisung does his best to avoid you, his ex, until he realizes his mistake far too late cw: suggestive themes, bad angst, cheating, swearing

i'm not going back, back, back, back, back

masterlist

previous next

chapter i. (wc: 1.1k)

“I just don’t get it Yang… He was supposed to be my soulmate.” You sobbed into your best friend’s shoulder for the hundredth time in the day, more tears forming at the memory of your abrupt break-up. 

Yangyang simply sighed, holding you closer while offering you another tissue. “He’s an asshole, Y/n. Just forget about him.” You quickly shook your head in denial, forcing yourself further into the male’s arms. Dejun, your other best friend, cringed in pity at the scene. You looked horrible - your hair disheveled, your eyes puffy and red, and your clothes very obviously dirty. 

It had been three days since Park Jisung called you to his apartment, telling you he knew about your ‘secret’ and announcing your relationship was over. You were left confused and heartbroken outside of Jisung’s door, holding a random cardboard box full of your own belongings. You tried reasoning with him for well over half an hour until he seemingly got tired of you and kicked you out to the curb, leading you to cry your heart out to your friends instead. You wondered if this was affecting him as much as it was affecting you. Although he seemed reserved to others, you had spent enough time with him to learn about his emotional nature. Nonetheless, there was no way to know about his state, considering all of your mutual friends had taken his side, blocking you after cussing you out. It was as if your world had completely shifted that day, only leaving behind your own two best friends to pick you up and take care of you, because God knows you weren’t going to. 

It didn’t take a genius to figure out why Jisung broke up with you. For some reason, he thought you had cheated on him. Unknowingly to him, there was no truth behind this accusation considering you were deeply in love with him and would never think about hurting him in such a manner. The fact that you were innocent only added to your frustration, trying to reach out to him in several ways to explain yet he wouldn’t allow you.

In a desperate last attempt, you messaged your old best friend Huang Renjun who had actually set the two of you up, only to find out your message never went through. He had blocked you as well, alongside every other friend of his you knew. Dejun, furious at them for not even listening to you, took your phone as soon as you arrived at his shared apartment with Yangyang, blocking them all back except for Jisung, only because you begged him not to. In your head, soon he’d realize his mistake and message you, reconciling immediately. It had been two days since you last messaged him though, and the hope was slipping through your fingers due to his radio silence. His threat to block you was a sign enough that he had no interest in speaking to you.

“I… I know he said not to message him, but maybe I could show up to his place? He can’t block me in real life…” Your friends were quick to voice their disagreement with your plan, Yangyang taking the lead. “Look, Y/n, I’m sorry but maybe it’s time to maybe contemplate moving on. If he truly cared he would have listened to you by now.” “You don’t get it Yang, obviously he thinks I cheated on him so naturally he won’t believe me. I just have to show him I didn’t.” You reasoned, earning concerned glances from your friends. You didn’t realize how delusional you sounded, yet you were too sensitive to get made fun of so they held back, simply consoling you further.

Despite the constant warnings from your friends, you were dead-set on getting Jisung to listen to you, so you did as you planned, buying his favorite food and some flowers as a gift and making your way to his familiar apartment. Alongside the gifts, you had written him a letter explaining the situation, just in case he wasn’t home.

It took you fifteen minutes to gain the courage to enter the elevator, yet you eventually did it. Pressing the number to his floor, you fidgeted uncomfortably at the silence until the doors slowly opened, allowing you to walk to his door. 

Just as you were about to gently knock your fist on his door, you heard three familiar voices. Huang Renjun, Lee Donghyuck, and of course, Park Jisung. You subconsciously smiled, having missed hearing them, and although it added to the nerves, you felt more determined to walk inside and prove your innocence. That was until you heard what the familiar voices were saying. 

“She was kind of annoying sometimes, honestly.” Donghyuck was the first voice you were able to make out, although muffled, making you press your ear closer to hear what he was saying. “You cursed Ji by setting them up, Jun.” A laugh came out from his mouth. “It’s not my fault dude, I didn’t know she was weird like that.” “It’s fine. I won’t be answering her anyway.” It had been so long since you had heard Jisung’s voice, and although the familiar tone made you want to smile, understanding what he was saying had the opposite effect, and before you realized it, there were several tears running down your face. “I have some chicks that asked me for your number, Ji. Maybe it’s time to rebound.” Your heart broke at Donghyuck’s suggestion. You two hadn’t been as close as you and Renjun, yet you still considered him someone you cared for, so to hear him sabotage your relationship in such a manner made you deeply upset. You held your breath waiting for Jisung’s response, hoping he’d deny. “I think I’m good.” Your heart swelled with hope for a second before it broke again at his next words, “Actually, maybe. Text me their numbers.” 

Not wanting to hear anything further, you left the gifts at his door. You muffled your own sobs with your hands, slipping the letter on top of the items, yet a cry made it through and you panicked realizing footsteps were approaching the door. Quickly rushing to the end of the hallway where there was a blind spot, you heard it opening. “Holy shit, she’s a stalker Ji.” “That’s it… I’m blocking her.” 

You regretted coming, cursing yourself for not listening to your friends. After hearing the voices stop and the door shut again, you waited a minute before returning to the hallway. It wasn’t until you neared the elevator that you saw your gifts in the trash can near his unit, with the letter sitting idly on top of the other garbage. 

You dissociated for the rest of your walk home, falling onto your bed and immediately falling asleep, yet making sure to block him back before. You decided you would listen to Yangyang and Dejun from now on.

Maybe it was time to move on.  

a/n: haechan when i catch you...

[idkwhatimdoinghere1655]

So Special - Lando Norris

<word count - 5350> |part 1 - Nerd|part 2 - Rumours|

The weekend had gone by, and you and Lando had spent your time doing very different things. He had been productive, spending his two days in the garage with his dad, perfecting your DT project. He couldn't care less that you had told him not to finish it.

He had said he would do it, and now he was damned sure that it would be the best one in the class. Lando and his dad had come up with some genius ideas, even if it was only meant to be a simple little wood-work task. 

It would probably be quite obvious that you hadn't done it in the workshop, but Lando had a feeling that you wouldn't care. Also with the help of his dad, Lando had gotten his homework rattled out within an hour. 

It wasn't quite the same as having you there to help him through it, since your way of teaching him was a lot better than his dad's, but it was better than nothing, that was for sure. 

You, on the other hand, had spent your weekend holed up in your bedroom, not wanting to come out for anyone or anything. Your parents had offered to take you out to any restaurant of your choosing, go somewhere with your friends, anything. 

But, you had declined all of their suggestions. You simply didn't feel like going anywhere. All you could think about was how much you were dreading going to school on Monday, how much you didn't want to see anyone in any of your classes.

It genuinely seemed like your worst nightmare at the moment, but you still had to go in. The minutes ticked by slowly over the weekend, every single one heightening the anxiety of being back in school. 

The most likely scenario was that people would have forgotten it by now and moved onto something else, but the feeling that that wasn't the case was overwhelming, crippling and soul-destroying. 

Even doing your maths homework felt near on impossible. A task that would normally only take you a few minutes took you nearly 2 hours, since trying to work with the numbers made nervousness swirl in your stomach. 

The ever present thought was Lando. If anything, you figured he had it the worst out of all of this. His friends mocked and ridiculed him at any chance they got, he couldn't even get the bus anymore without throwing in the towel and getting off early, and you didn't want to be around him anymore. 

Guilt mixed into the cesspool of emotions that you were feeling, but the pure fear of being in school and getting the mick taken out of you overshadowed that. You just wanted to get your education and run as far away from that damned place as you could. 

Once Monday morning had rolled around, you reluctantly got onto the bus, not wanting to walk in the frosty weather. Lando's mum would've given you a ride, but you didn't want to be seen getting out of his car. Now that would be pure social suicide. 

On the bus, you saw that Lando wasn't there, which made things easier. But, you sure as hell weren't sitting at the back near his friends. You shuffled onto a seat next to some random kids in a year below you, but you'd much rather do that than be subjected to Lando's friends.

School was relatively empty when you got there, most people going to sit in the canteen before the bell went for their first lessons. You made a beeline to the lockers, hoping that no one would be there.

Thankfully, there wasn't a soul in sight as you quickly punched the code into Lando's locker. You knew the code since you'd had to leave his homework in there a few times in the past. You pulled his jumper out of your bag and stuffed it in. On the top, you placed a small note of gratitude, before closing the locker back up and going over to yours to put in some of your textbooks.

To your surprise, your locker wasn't empty like you thought it would be. Inside was a small, plastic bag. Just like you had put on Lando's jumper, whoever had been in your locker had put a note on top of it. 'I promised I'd get this finished, and I am a man of my word'. 

You knew that handwriting off by heart, since it was one you often plagiarised. Opening the bag, you saw your fully finished, absolutely faultless DT woodwork project. You were baffled by how clean the cuts and joints were, and it was surely going to get you the best mark you had ever gotten in DT. 

The first genuine smile that you had cracked in days grew across your face, truly touched by the gesture. You had told him not to bother, that you'd do it yourself, even if you really didn't want to. "I did it right, yeah?" a voice suddenly broke you out of your small bout of happiness.

Lando was leant against his locker, hands in his pockets as he looked at you. His face was tired, it didn't have the life to it as it used to. His eyes were equally as lethargic, no longer holding that cheeky spark that they always had. It was like the colour had dulled out, leaving them more greyed over than blue. 

"Yeah, you did. It's great, thanks," you mustered up a small smile, barely even a fraction of the one you had earlier. For some reason, your brain still couldn't make you look him in the eyes as you talked to him.

"Anytime," he replied, his gaze fixed on your side profile. He was thinking the same about your appearance too, your face had sunken and your eyes weren't as bright as he remembered them being. 

"I don't think anyone's going to say anything, you know..." he mumbled, half hoping you'd heard him, half hoping you hadn't. The words sounded like he was trying to convince himself more than he was trying to convince you, since he wanted to believe that they were true. 

He didn't want to see you upset anymore, he didn't want to have to distance himself from you, he didn't want to have to change his entire routine. All he wanted was his life right back to the way it was. 

The life when you two were friends, where he'd get to spend time with you. The life where he got to be Lando Norris, the cocky little shit to the rest of the year, but a softie for you. The life where everything was perfect again. 

"I don't think it's that easy, Lando," you said, your eyes still glued to your feet as you avoided eye contact with him. Even the sound of his name on your lips made his heart flutter uncontrollably. He wanted to hear more of it, he wanted to hear it every goddamn day of his life if you'd let him.

"Please? Can we just... just try to ignore it and still be friends? I just want to be your friend again, I mi-" he started to plead, the desperation evident in his tone. His face fell as he was cut off, knowing that both of you were in deep shit before the day had even started. 

"You what, Lando? Bit of trouble in paradise for our most prolific love birds?" some random guy in your year interrupted him, standing beside Lando. He had never seen fear in a person's features like he did on yours in that very moment.

You didn't think you could handle hearing another word of it, so you dashed past the both of them and down the hall, trying not to let the tears fall down your cheeks. He hadn't even said anything overly hurtful, but the panic of what he could have said had set in.

"Not gonna run after your girlfriend, Lando?" he further teased, and Lando could feel his fists clenching at his sides, his knuckles turning white due to how hard he was holding them. He knew that a comment like that wouldn't have normally set you off, but it just showed how bad the situation had gotten. 

"Go fuck yourself," he spat, walking to the canteen and sitting down on a table away from his friends. They had seen him come in, but he didn't care. They were the last people he wanted to talk to. 

For the first time in his life, he was desperate to get to lessons and have some much wanted distraction from everything that was going on. As soon as the bell had gone, he jumped out of his seat and took the shortest route that he could think of to the science labs for biology. 

Not to his shock, you were already sat in your seat, hunched over your textbook and exercise book. Lando took his seat, a few down from yours on the long, wooden benches. The start of the lesson was silent to begin with, before you were all assigned to do some questions with the people sat around you.

Lando tried to keep focused on the questions, but he couldn't help but hear his own name coming from your side of the table. As he discretely watched from the side, he saw as your head snapped up to the girl next to you. Lilly. 

Goddamnit, of course it had to be Lilly. The one girl who Lando was for sure certain was desperate for him. "Sorry?" you said, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. You hadn't been listening to a word she was saying, so you had to do a double take now that she was suddenly talking about Lando. 

"You spent the weekend with Lando, no? Since he's your boyfriend and all, I assumed what I heard was true," she said, her voice laced with a sickly sweet venom. The jealousy she felt was obvious, and it did give you a slightly masochistic sense of satisfaction. 

"No," you curtly answered with a small shake of the head, before returning to answering the questions by yourself. Lando couldn't see Lilly's face since she was looking at you, with her blinding mop of bleached blonde hair being the only thing he could see. 

"What? So it's not true?" she pressed, clearly looking for a reaction that you weren't willing to give her. 

"No, no it's not," you declined again, your leg bouncing up and down nervously. Lando grinned to himself, proud of you for sticking up for yourself and not giving in. He just hoped you had the willpower to carry on being as strong as you were, since he knew how sensitive you were at the minute.

"So the two of you didn't spend this weekend, practically locked in his parent's house by the lake while the bed was creaking-" 

"Right that's enough." you said, your voice firm and leaving no room for disagreement. Lilly looked a tiny bit shook by your defiance, but Lando was sat there, wide-eyed. He never told anyone about the house by the lake apart from Max, and the likelihood of him telling Lilly of all people was slim to none. 

But he was more taken aback and impressed by your steadfastness. He had expected you to be in tears by this point, but it was a more than pleasant surprise. He still couldn't see Lilly's face, but he could imagine the annoying pout as her lips were pursed together.

"I don't know who you heard that from, but that is complete and utter bullshit. I spent my weekend at home. As for Lando? I couldn't really give a shit, but he wasn't with me. Much to your dismay, he wasn't with you either,"  you carried on, and your conversation had pricked up some of your class' listening ears. 

Lilly looked like you had just slapped her, her mouth agape and eyes wide as she looked at you. "I... you..." she stuttered, unsure of how to respond. As much as Lando was glad that you were sticking up for yourself, he was also feeling a slight stabbing pain in his chest. 

You 'couldn't really give a shit'. The worst part was that he couldn't tell if you meant it or not. He doubted that you did, but there was always the small question of what if? What if you had meant it?

If he was being honest, the thought of you not caring scared the life out of him. It wasn't something that he wanted to believe, not at all. He knew that the two of you weren't on the best terms, not by either of your faults but you still weren't friends, yet that didn't warrant you not caring at all, right?

The one person whose opinion he idolised, the one person who he wanted to see everyday, the one person who he could be himself around didn't care. It simply didn't register in his mind that that was even possible. 

By the time Lando had snapped out of his thoughts, the teacher had resumed his lesson and you and Lilly were sat in silence, a scowl still plastered on her face. The rest of the lesson wasn't focused on biology, at least not for Lando. 

Both of you left as quickly as you could and went to your favourite respective places to spend your break times. Lando didn't know where you'd be this time, since you moved just about every five minutes. 

He knew that your little outburst would get back to his friends by the end of the break, and he didn't want to be there when they inevitably found out. He couldn't figure out what they'd say to him or how they'd react, but he knew there would be more teasing. 

He was upset enough as it was, and he didn't need them to make it worse. Lando stayed away from the canteen, just aimlessly wandering through the near-empty halls. As he approached the lockers on his third lap of the school, his ears picked up the sounds of a familiar voice. 

"You think you're so special, don't you?" she said, and he could have sworn that all he could see was red. Lilly. And there was no doubts in his mind over who she was talking to.

"I bet you're loving all of this attention, aren't you? You probably started these rumours yourself, didn't you?" Lilly carried on, Lando staying behind the wall while he listened to her onslaught. He hadn't seen you, but he could picture the look on your face. 

"Why the hell would I make up such awful things about myself? I'm not an attention seeker like you, I don't want this happening," you retorted, a smirk growing on Lando's face as he heard you. He was glad you weren't running off and crying anymore, but he assumed you were bottling it all up as a way of coping. 

"Please, you're just annoyed that Lando would never actually date you, aren't you?" she said, and you were both gobsmacked. You knew that that was why she was getting pissy with you, but you didn't think she'd spell it out point blank. 

"What, like he'd date you either?" you shot back, stunning Lilly into silence. Initially, she was right to assume that her saying all of these things would reduce you to tears, but today you had built a shell around you - one that almost seemed impenetrable. 

But, hidden beneath the tough exterior and firm words, Lando could hear the faintest of a wobble in your voice. Lilly wouldn't pick up on it, but he had. Maybe it was just because he knew you so well already, or maybe it was just because he liked you so damn much that he noticed all of the tiniest little things about you. 

"Please, I think anyone would rather date me over you," she said after a few moments, the come back taking longer for her to think up than she would have liked.  You nearly laughed in her face, nearly told her what a massive bitch she was and how most people would rather be dead than date her. 

However, someone swooped in. "I know I wouldn't."

"Oh, hey Lando, we were just talking about you," Lilly instantly stepped in, her voice suddenly turning nauseatingly sacchariferous. She stepped closer to him, batting her false eyelashes at him as if it would put him under her spell. 

"Yeah, I heard." he said, his voice betraying none of his emotions. Lilly could tell that something was up with him, but she chose to ignore it and carry on trying to woo him. 

"I was just saying how-"

"I heard it. And I don't think you have any right to say any of that about Y/N. She is a much better person than you, and you're stupid to think she'd make those rumours about us. That's something you'd do. Also, I'll reiterate. I would rather date her than you any day of the week." he said, not missing a beat between sentences.

Lilly stayed quiet, that familiar scowl finding its place back on her face. "Fine, yeah, whatever," she scoffed, rolling her eyes as she stormed away from you. 

You let out a breath that you hadn't realised you had been holding, finally feeling the weight of the day pressing down on you. You had done so well to keep it all bottled up as you stood up for yourself, but now it felt like the adrenaline had worn off and your resolve was crumbling. 

Once she had gone, Lando turned to you and saw the tears in your eyes. "Hey, no, don't..." he softly said, approaching you. He was unsure whether he was allowed to hug you or touch you or if he was supposed to just leave you alone to cry. 

He contemplated it, but he couldn't force himself to walk away. You had let all of the fear and the upset of the weekend and the past couple of hours to build up, and now it was finally too heavy for you to hold up. 

"Can I... can I please just..." he started, not knowing how to ask the question. He didn't want to outright ask if he could hold you, but he didn't know what else to say. Instead, he hovered his arms awkwardly around you as if he was gesturing at hugging you. 

"Mhm," you hummed, your arms going around his neck as his wrapped around your waist. It was nice to be close to you again, to have you again. He also felt a rush of affection. He didn't know how long to hold the hug, how tightly to hold you, where to put his head. 

Did he rest it on top of yours? Bury it in the crook of your neck? Just... keep it there? 

Despite his inner turmoil, his instincts took his hand up the the back of your head, fingers tangling in the strands of hair. "Please don't cry, c'mon, it's OK," he mumbled, hating the way you shook with silent sobs in his arms. 

He knew you had kept your emotions all bundled up inside all day, but he couldn't handle you being so upset. "I'm sorry..." you mumbled, but he couldn't make out the words as they were muffled by his chest. 

"Hm? What did you say?" he gently asked, looking down at you as you looked up at him. It had just dawned on him how close you were, and how easy it would be just to lean down and kiss you like he- no, no. Not the time. Not yet, at least. 

"I said I'm sorry," you repeated, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. 

"Sorry for what?"

"I'm sorry for... avoiding you, not being your friend, being a complete and utter bitch to you, and-" you started to ramble, more tears falling from your eyes. 

"Hey, no, no, I won't hear it. None of this is your fault, absolutely none of it. OK?" he reassured you, needing you to know that you hadn't done anything wrong. All you did was nod, before hugging him tighter and resting your head back on his chest. 

His white button up was slightly see through with tears, but he'd be able to hide it with his blazer no problem. "Shh, please don't cry," he carried on trying to soothe you, his mind going through thousands of other things he wanted to say.

'You're too pretty to cry...' was the first thing that came to the forefront of his brain, but that was too much too soon. He felt your shudders against him stilling as you opted to just stand there in his embrace. He wasn't complaining, he would stay like that for as long as you'd let him.   

From down the hall, he could hear the faint pattering of footsteps. Lando didn't want to say anything, he just wanted to let them walk by and they'd likely ignore the two of you. Once you heard it too, you pushed back from him so that there was a sizeable gap between you both. 

He was disappointed, to say the least, but he understood your trepidation. It was a good job that you had stepped away, since the person that walked by was one of Lilly's friends. She was probably already floating around, spreading as many lies as her single-celled brain could muster. 

"I'll... see you later, yeah?" you weakly smiled, checking the time and seeing that it was nearly time for your next class. 

"Yeah, course. You getting the bus or do you need a ride?" he asked, confident that his mum would happily pick you up down the road and take you home. 

"A ride would be nice," you nodded, and he was slightly taken aback by the fact that you hadn't argued with him. You were as stubborn as the day was long, but he was happy you had relented  quickly on this occasion. 

"You just start walking home and we'll find you somewhere along the road," he told you and you nodded. 

"Sounds good," you lightly chuckled, the sound welcome to his ears. He hadn't heard any semblance of a laugh from you in nearly a week, and he was unbelievably grateful that he had gotten to hear it again. 

"See ya," he smiled as you walked away, a wave of contentedness washing over him. Even if it has come as a result of some of the toughest days of both your life and his, he had gotten to hug you. To actually hug you, to touch you more than your fingers just brushing together when you handed something to each other. 

It was what he had wanted, and he had finally gotten it. The price was hefty, but he had gotten it nonetheless. Now, he was counting down the seconds until he'd get to drive you home, spend more time with you, talk to you again.      

The rest of the day wasn't actually too bad. Just the odd comment or two, but it was nothing compared to what the pair of you had been getting over the past few days. Lando actually found a few of them quite funny, when he thought about it. 

"Hey Norris, your girlfriend is feisty, eh? Bet that makes her fun for you," one of the boys in your year said, as if it was meant to hurt or upset him. Instead he just laughed, shaking his head. 

"Feisty? Very," was all he could get out before walking away to get to his next lesson. Lando had never been so prudent with getting to his lessons, but he found that it was the best way to spend his time. 

Hour after hour went by, and before he knew it, Lando was practically running out of the front doors of the school and towards his mum's car. She was parked in the same spot that she always was, and he hopped in the back in preparation for you to get in too. 

"Why are you sitting back there?" she asked, looking at him in the rear view mirror. 

"We're picking Y/N up down the road," he said, leaning over the center console to turn on the heated seats on your side, as well as leaving his jumper from the day on your seat. He had found the one that you had returned to him in his locker, but he wanted you to have the one he had already worn.

There was something strangely intimate about you wearing his jumpers as a source of warmth and comfort, but he wasn't opposed to it. He knew that a lot of girls stole their boyfriend's hoodies, but this wasn't quite that scenario.

He wanted it to be, there was no doubt about that, but this made him feel like you two were a few steps closer to that. You were always happy to wear his jumpers, but he sometimes wished you wouldn't return then just so that he could ask for them back. Not that he wanted them back. If you wanted them, they were all yours. 

"Oh are we now?" she smirked, finding her son's actions towards you as endearing as hell. He was shaping up to be the boy she wanted to raise, and she was so proud of him. She could tell his crush on you was definitely developing, and the distance between you clearly made him want you more. 

"Yeah, we are," he said, leaving no room for her to say no. Well, she wouldn't have said no since it was cold and she didn't want you walking such a distance in such cold temperatures. 

"Does she know we're taking her home or have you just decided?"

"I asked if she wanted a ride and she said yes, so we're picking her up," he reiterated, plugging his seat belt into the socket and getting comfortable against the leather of the seats. 

"OK, OK," she chuckled, shaking her head. Igniting the engine, Lando's mum pulled away from her parking spot and started driving down the road, looking out for you. As she glanced at the rear-view mirror, she could see Lando's eyes glued to the window, searching for you on the pavement. 

She knew he had seen him by the way his eyes lit up and a small smile crept its way across his lips. Pulling up on the pavement, she rolled the passenger side window down as she called out to you. "Your chauffeur awaits," 

Clambering in the passenger side, you saw Lando's jumper on your chair, instantly taking your blazer off and replacing it with the garment. It was so much warmer than your coat, and you felt so much more comfortable in it too. 

You didn't fail to notice the heat that emanated from the seat as well, the added care making butterflies spark in your stomach. "You really don't have to go to the effort of picking me up, you know." you said, feeling slightly bad that she was going out of her way to take you home. 

"Well it was Lando's idea. He just told me we were picking you up and here we are," she told you, and you could sense the blush that coated Lando's cheeks. 

"Mum c'mon, don't..." he mumbled, crossing his arms and avoiding her gaze in the mirror. He had a slight pout on his face, and it reminded her of when he didn't get what he wanted when he was little. He was always adorable. 

You just giggled at him, and it was music to his ears. Seeing you warm and cozy in his hoodie was definitely something he wanted more of, and he wasn't sure how much more waiting he could do before he cracked and acted on his impulses. 

Yet, he didn't know what he'd do if you rejected him, or said you just wanted to be friends. He never wanted to be just friends with you, he wanted it all with you. He wanted you to be his first real girlfriend, the one you can never really forget. 

And he could only hope that you wanted the same from him. His gut feeling told him that it was obvious that you were feeling the same. Why else would you hug him, accept a ride home from him, wear his jumpers?   

He didn't care, all he did care about was the fact that his heart was dead set on the notion that you did like him back, but his head was throwing doubts at him. 

After a short drive and light conversation, you pulled up outside of your house. Instead of his mum this time, Lando wanted to be the one who walked you to your door. Getting out of his seat and taking a few steps forward to your door, he opened it forward and stood to the side. 

Grabbing your bag out of the footwell, Lando carried it to your front door as you walked together. "Do you think we could go to the library tomorrow at second break? I tried to use the textbook to do the biology, but I really couldn't understand. Plus, I think my knowledge of female anatomy could really be helped out by you," he joked, and it was refreshing to see a bit of Lando's regular cheek coming to the fore. 

If someone else had made the comment, you would've been pissed off, maybe a little upset. But not when it was Lando. His usual sense of humor was coming back, and it was like things were slowly returning back to normal. 

"I think the textbook is a better help on that subject than I am," you countered, and Lando just smirked at you. 

"Probably, but I'm much more of a hands-on learner. I'd like to have the real thing in front of me, you know?" he quipped, and you couldn't help but laugh at him. Now this was how things were meant to be. Just you two, laughing and enjoying being in each other's company. 

"Sure," you agreed. Well, not to the hands on learning, just to teaching him the stuff he didn't understand. Your way of explaining things was good for Lando, it made him understand it a lot better than the teachers could. 

"Can I get a hug before I go?" he tentatively asked, his brain working overtime to try and think of a joke to play it off in case you said no.

"Course you can," you said, your arms finding their place back around his neck as you leant into him. Just the feeling of you in his arms was enough to get his heart racing, and he felt the ever similar urge to just lean down and kiss you. 

A soft smile found its way onto his mum's face - who was watching on from the car. Seeing the both of you so miserable was dreadful, so now seeing you making up and going back to the ordinary was more than enough for her. 

There was no missing the fond, soft look in her son's eyes. It was nothing but pure affection and admiration, and it was clear how much he cared for you. She had never seen such adoration from him, and she should have guessed that it'd be you. 

From the first time your name had ever slipped past his lips, she should've known just by the way he spoke about you. And now, there you were. The two of you, as you were meant to be. 

You and Lando bade each other farewell, and he waited until you were safely inside the confines of your own home before walking back to his mum's car and getting in the passenger seat. "You two seem to have made up," she said, a slightly teasing tone to her voice. 

"Yeah, something like that," he agreed, knowing it was more than that. Or so he hoped. If only he knew that things weren't that simple, that the rose tinted glasses would be ripped from his face just as quickly as they had been put there. 

A/N - Hello lovely people! Chipping away at all the stuff I have half finished, which is part 2 to Hotel Girl, the requested part 2 of Ceilings, a little old Charlos thing, a Lando thing and Max's birthday special! I have to do one for old Maxie since we have the same birthday so we can roll our birthday specials into one. Have a great night, love y'all! 💖

tag list: @oh-austin @avni-sarai @cheriladycl01 @mariedeyes223 @daemyraforever56 @toriiez @robotchickenmerp

|masterlist|

[iridescent-solstice]

Fic 1/2 made for the amazing @cinsilly for winning this contest I hosted a while back. I hope you like it and also thank you for participating in my silly little shenanigans. If I did my job right, hopefully you’ll join future events too! 🙆🏻‍♀️

The candle by his side burns faithfully as Julian leans over his cluttered desk. Wispy strands of his ginger hair wave back and forth as he grumbles in frustration. With an aching back and cramped wrists, his sleep deprived mind urges him to take a break.

But he won't. Because there is much to be done. Far too much.

He chides himself internally for not working enough. For not being fast enough. Because, despite the countless hours he’s spent here, there are still too many old journals to comb through. Too many documents he’s scribbled and had to scrap or re-read. He's frustrated. Tired. Hungry and extremely worried for all the people out there in worst conditions than he is. The physical states of those already infected aren't getting much better, and the count's temper is only getting worse. "DAMMIT WHY IS NOTHING WORKING!" He curses slamming his fist down on the poor table. It's like he's walking around in endless circles, isn't he? There has to be a cure! He chants in his head. With a library as huge as this, there must be something here about a plague spreading by beetles.

It’s almost beginning to feel like he’s drowning in pile and piles of unending assigned reading. Even with an apprentice, there’s still so much he has to do. If he doesn’t . . . No. Julian shakes the thoughts away. He doesn’t want to think about those consequences. Finding the cure is too vital a task to slack on. And he won't discover it if he spends all his time wondering about what will happen if he doesn't manage to uncover it. He can do it . . . Well, even if he couldn’t, there are too many people's lives at stake to not try his darn hardest. Too people relying on him. The countess. The citizens of Versuvia. The count. But most importantly . . . his apprentice is counting on him too. So, he has to find a cure. No.matter.what.the.cost.

Books, letters, documents and other knick knacks are sprawled all over the cinnamon-coloured table. But the mess inside his head is even worse than the one infront of him. A looming giant window behind him gives a glimpse into the internal state of the city. Cold, dark, deserted and in complete disarray. The normal hustle and bustle is no longer as usual as it once used to be. You’d be lucky if you saw a single person in sight. Not anymore though. They’re all hiding away inside their homes. He has no doubt that you would be too if you gave yourself the luxury too.

But he’s glad you haven’t taken that liberty. That you care enough to stay by his side. To risk your life. He has no idea how he'd do this without you. Throughout all his travels at sea, he's spent a great deal of his time alone. But he doesn't think he could ever go back to that lifestyle anymore. He needs you. 

He needs you to check up on him. To hold his hand and cheerfully tell him everything will be alright again. To not give up. He nee- No he wants you. Wants you to sit suspiciously close by as he navigates the medical forms. While he relays the important findings he just discovered. As he flips through the records. Patient after patient, case after case. It’s almost too much, but he knows he can handle it. With you by his side, he’s sure he can handle anything. Fatigued eyes search all over the table but his thoughts wander to you again. Like they always do when he’s stressed out. Are you hunched over a desk like he is? Huddled up in your shop researching old tomes? He wonders if you think about him too. He wonders if you miss his company as much as he misses yours. He can’t imagine those talking books to be good company. 

[ ᴅɪᴠɪᴅᴇʀꜱ ʙʏ: @/fairytopea]

[cheynovak]

Sweetheart - Part 2

Characters: Jensen Ackles x Y/N Female character     

Summary: After years apart, Y/N and Jensen, high school sweethearts, unexpectedly reunite. As they reminisce about their past, Jensen expresses regret about their breakup, and the chemistry between them reignites. Despite the weight of Jensen's current relationship with Danneel, they share a tentative kiss that brings back fond memories of their first love.

Warnings: none

*Please do not copy my work, reblog/comments/likes are appreciated* 

Weeks had passed since that night, but the kiss with Jensen lingered in my mind like a song stuck on repeat. I couldn’t shake it, the way it made me feel—like that teenage girl all over again, falling hopelessly in love for the first time. Every time I closed my eyes, I could still feel the warmth of his lips, the tenderness in his touch, and the familiar flutter in my chest.

In a moment of nostalgia, I found myself digging through old photo albums, hoping to make sense of the whirlwind of emotions I couldn’t quite shake. Flipping through the pages, I paused when I found them—our prom pictures.

I stared at the photo, my fingers lightly brushing over it. There I was, standing next to Jensen in that long, flowy dress I had spent weeks picking out. He looked so young, his suit slightly too big, but his smile was everything. I looked up at him with stars in my eyes, my love for him written all over my face. My heart ached as I realized just how deep those feelings had run back then, how simple everything had seemed.

In that picture, I looked so in love, my eyes sparkling with hope, and Jensen—he had always looked at me like I was his world. A part of me wondered if he still cared.

My phone buzzed, pulling me from the haze of memories that had consumed me. I looked up from the bed, where I’d been sitting with the old photo album spread across my lap, and reached for my phone on the nightstand. The screen lit up with a message from an unknown number.

*Hi, I hope you don't mind. I asked around to find your number. I really hope I didn’t scare you off the other night. Maybe we can still be friends? J.*

The moment I read his words, my stomach fluttered. Butterflies danced in my chest, and I could picture him so clearly, standing there with that boyish nervousness, hand rubbing the back of his neck, unsure of how I’d respond. Just like he had done the very first time he came up to me in high school.

I could still see it—us in the school yard. Jensen and I had been stealing glances at each other for days, neither of us bold enough to make the first move. His friends had practically pushed him toward me, egging him on, while mine giggled behind me, watching the whole scene unfold.

I remembered how he fumbled for words at first, clearly nervous, but the second our eyes met, everything else fell away. He’d made me laugh with some awkward joke, and from that moment, it all just clicked. That was where it had started—those small, tentative steps toward each other, the way his nerves melted into charm, and how, before we knew it, we were inseparable.

And now, after all these years, there was that same feeling. I texted back, *" I'd love to be friends! Hope to run into you soon."*

His response came almost immediately: *"Why wait for fate again? How about tomorrow?"*

I swallowed hard, my heart pounding in my chest. That was fast. My fingers hovered over the keyboard for a moment before I typed, *"Name the place, and time."* A few seconds later, my phone buzzed again, this time with an address.

I didn’t think much of it until I arrived. It wasn’t just any spot—it was our place. By the lake. The place we’d spent countless hours during summer, the place where we’d shared so many memories. My heart clenched as I stepped out of the car and saw him standing there, the sun beginning to set behind him, casting a warm glow on the water.

As I walked toward him, my breath caught in my throat. Jensen had changed, undeniably so. He wasn’t the lanky boy I once knew. His shoulders had broadened, his posture more confident, and his beard was neatly trimmed. God, he looked handsome. The years had been kind to him in ways that made my stomach flutter all over again.

But his smile—that hadn’t changed. It was the same easy, boyish grin that had always made me feel like I was the only person in the world. He took a step toward me, and for a moment, everything felt like it had slipped back into place, like no time had passed at all.

As he leaned in, I saw it. The flash of white gold. His wedding ring.

My heart dropped into my stomach, and instinctively, I turned my head, offering my cheek instead. His lips grazed my skin, warm and soft, but that one small gesture felt like a wall going up between us.

I forced a smile, trying to shake off the sudden weight in my chest. “Hey,” I said, my voice steady even though my mind was racing.

Jensen pulled back, his own expression faltering for a second, as if realizing the same thing I had at the last moment. “Hi,” he replied, his voice soft, almost tentative, like he wasn’t sure what to do next.

The silence between us stretched for a moment, the lake's quiet lapping against the shore the only sound. It wasn’t uncomfortable, but it was different. Everything was different. And yet, despite it all, the connection between us still lingered, fragile but undeniable.

After the silence settled between us, Jensen suddenly started to laugh. His deep, familiar chuckle broke through the tension, and I couldn’t help but smile, even though my heart was still racing.

“What’s up?” I asked, glancing up at him, curious.

He shook his head, grinning. “I just remembered that time you accidentally pushed me into the lake. You were so freaked out that you offered to buy me hot cocoa because you felt so guilty.”

I couldn’t help but laugh softly at the memory, warmth spreading through my chest. “Yeah... And you paid for it behind my back.” I looked down at my feet, feeling the nostalgia wash over me, tugging at both my heart and my nerves.

“Yeah,” he said, his smile softening as he looked at me, but then the silence returned. This time, it felt heavier, like the weight of everything unsaid was pressing down on us.

I swallowed, bracing myself before I spoke again. “J, what are we doing here?” My voice was quieter, but steady. I didn’t mean *here* as in this spot by the lake. We both knew I meant something deeper, us. Whatever was happening between us now.

His smile faded slightly as he looked at me, his expression turning serious. He knew exactly what I was asking. His gaze dropped to the ground for a moment, and I could see the conflict in his eyes. Jensen shifted his weight, rubbing the back of his neck in that familiar way, but this time, it wasn’t just nerves—it was hesitation, uncertainty.

He sighed, glancing at the lake before meeting my eyes again. "I don’t know," he admitted softly. "I guess I’ve been thinking about us a lot lately. About what we had... and what could’ve been."

Hearing him say that out loud made my heart twist. “But you’re married, J,” I whispered, not wanting to break the delicate moment, but needing to be real. “We can’t pretend that doesn’t matter.”

“I know.” His voice was filled with regret, but there was something more there—an ache, like he wasn’t sure what to do with the feelings that had clearly resurfaced between us. “I just—seeing you again, it’s made me realize how much I miss… this. You. Us.”

I looked at him, feeling torn. I took a deep breath, feeling the weight of the moment as I gathered the courage to admit what had been swirling in my mind for weeks. “I looked at our old pictures,” I said softly. “High school, prom… all of it. I guess I miss us too.”

Jensen turned his head slightly, his gaze meeting mine briefly before drifting back out over the lake. The corners of his mouth twitched into a small smile, and for a moment, I could see the memories flashing in his eyes.

“Prom night,” he murmured, his voice tinged with nostalgia. “That was a great night.”

I nodded, the memory vivid in my mind—the music, the laughter, the way he held me like we were the only two people in the world. But before I could say anything more, Jensen spoke again.

“I remember what you wore that night,” he said, his eyes still fixed on the water as if he was pulling the image from the depths of his memory. “That blue dress. You looked incredible. I couldn’t stop staring at you the entire night.”

Jensen’s eyes sparkled as he described the outfit you wore to prom. I could see him picturing every detail.

"The fabric of the dress hugged your figure perfectly, the soft flow of it as you moved, and how the color made you stand out under the dim prom lights." And then he added "Your hair… you had it up, right? All messy and beautiful.”

I nodded, biting my lip as I remembered the exact moment. " Simple, soft curls, lose curls or two framing your face, beautiful" He’d complimented me back then too, and I could still hear his words in my mind as if they were said just yesterday.

“I couldn’t take my eyes off you the whole night,” Jensen confessed quietly, his voice filled with the same affection from all those years ago.

I looked at him, watching the way he was lost in the memory, and I couldn’t help but smile.

I blinked, caught off guard by how easily he recalled every detail. “You remember that?” I asked, my heart skipping a beat.

He chuckled softly. “Yeah, how could I forget? You were… perfect.”

I bit my lip, warmth flooding my chest as I watched him, the sunset casting a soft glow over his face. The way he spoke, the way he remembered, made me feel like we were back there again, dancing under the stars like nothing else mattered.

Jensen’s gaze softened as he continued, his eyes locked on the lake but his mind clearly elsewhere—back in time. “You know,” he said slowly, almost as if he was still savoring the memory, “when I saw you that night… I don’t think I’ve ever felt more nervous in my life.”

I raised my brow, surprised. “You? Nervous?”

He chuckled under his breath. “Yeah. You looked... perfect. That blue dress, it wasn’t just the color—it was how you wore it, how you moved. You were so confident, so beautiful, I didn’t know what to do with myself. All I could think was, *Don’t screw this up, Jensen.*” He let out a soft laugh, shaking his head as if still teasing his younger self.

His smile faded slightly as he grew more reflective. “I remember how the room practically disappeared when you walked in. Everyone was there, but all I could see was you." He paused, looking at me with that familiar glint in his eyes.

"You were laughing about something with your friends when I walked up with pur drinks. I couldn’t even think of anything to say. I just stood there, completely stunned, and you—God, you smiled at me, and it was like... nothing else mattered.”

I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks as he spoke, every word carrying more weight than I expected. “I didn’t know you felt that way,” I whispered.

Jensen shrugged, his gaze still far off. “I wasn’t good at showing it back then. But that night... I knew I was in love with you. I was already falling, but when I saw you like that? I was gone. I spent the whole night trying to find excuses to... to touch you, to be close. It was like I couldn’t breathe unless you were right there next to me.”

I swallowed hard, feeling the intensity of his words. He was opening up in a way that was both tender and heartbreaking. His voice lowered as he added, “When we danced, I remember thinking... This is it. You were the only thing that mattered in that room, in that moment, in my whole damn world.”

I looked at him, searching his face, realizing that this wasn't just some old high school memory to him. It was something he had held onto, just as I had.

He glanced over at me, his expression vulnerable, like he was trying to find the right words to explain how deeply those moments had stuck with him.

I smiled softly at the memory, looking down at my feet as the words tumbled out. “I remember how most of my friends went off with their dates to some cheap motel after prom... but you didn’t.”

Jensen smirked, the playful edge in his voice making me glance up at him. “Trust me, I wanted to,” he admitted, the honesty in his tone catching me off guard. His eyes sparkled with a mix of mischief and affection, but I could tell he wasn’t just talking about the physical desire. It was deeper than that.

“Yet, you didn’t,” I said, my voice softer now, recalling that night in vivid detail. “Instead, you drove us here.” I gestured toward the lake, the exact same spot we were standing in now. “We laid under the stars, kissing, talking... just holding me.”

He nodded, his smirk fading into something more tender. “Yeah,” he whispered, his eyes softening as they met mine. “I didn’t need anything else that night. You were everything.”

I could feel my heart swell as the memory flooded back. The way the cool night breeze had danced over our skin, the sound of the lake lapping gently at the shore, and the stars—so many stars—hanging above us like tiny specks of light, illuminating that perfect moment.

The sun had dipped below the horizon, leaving a soft, cool breeze in its wake. I instinctively wrapped my arms around myself, trying to fight off the slight chill. Jensen, noticing my discomfort, walked over to his truck, parked just a few feet away with the tailgate facing the lake. Without a word, he opened the back, rummaging around until he pulled out a blanket.

He patted the back of the truck, motioning for me to sit. I hesitated for a moment, but then climbed up, perching on the edge. The cold metal of the truck’s surface sent a shiver through me, but before I could say anything, Jensen was standing right in front of me. Eye to eye now, the closeness made my heart race.

Without a word, he gently draped the blanket over my shoulders, his hands brushing against my skin, sending a wave of warmth through me. “Don’t want you to get sick on my watch,” he said softly, his voice low and filled with that familiar care. The sound of it sent a shiver down my spine—not from the cold, but from the feeling of being so close to him again.

I could only stare up at him, taking in every detail of his face. The way his jawline was more defined now, the faintest traces of freckles still visible, and those eyes—just as green and mesmerizing as they were all those years ago. My breath hitched slightly as his gaze held mine, filled with something unspoken.

There was a tenderness in the way he looked at me, and for a moment, it felt like nothing had changed between us. Like we were still those two kids, wrapped up in each other, the world falling away around us. The lake, the stars, the silence—it was all there, but the only thing I could focus on was him.

Jensen’s fingers lingered on the blanket for a second longer than necessary, as if he didn’t want to break the moment. His touch was warm, reassuring, and I found myself lost in the feel of it.

“You always took care of me,” I whispered, the words slipping out before I could stop them.

Jensen’s lips curled into a soft smile. I couldn't tear my eyes away from his lips, memories of every kiss we'd ever shared rushing back to me in waves. The tension between us crackled, making the cool night air feel electric. His hand moved slowly, deliberately, brushing against my cheek, his thumb tracing the line of my jaw. The touch was so tender, like he was afraid I might disappear if he moved too fast.

Then, before I could even process what was happening, his lips were on mine. Soft, hesitant. He didn’t pull away, but he didn’t push forward either, waiting for my reaction, giving me space. It was just a whisper of a kiss, almost like he was testing the waters, feeling the way things still hung between us after all this time.

A second kiss followed, still light but with a little more certainty, and by the third, something shifted. My nerves—strung tight ever since we met again—began to calm, and I leaned into him, allowing myself to fall into the familiarity of it. It was like muscle memory, like our bodies remembered each other in ways our minds had tried to forget.

By the fourth kiss, everything else faded away. His lips parted slightly, a silent question, asking for permission without words. On instinct, I answered, my mouth opening to meet his, and suddenly I was 15 again, feeling that same nervous excitement that had coursed through me the very first time we kissed. My heart pounded, and for a moment, it felt like time had folded in on itself, bringing us right back to the start.

It was different now, though. Deeper. More layered. The years we’d spent apart, the lives we’d lived, everything that had changed between us—it all melted away in that moment, leaving only the two of us, tangled in something that felt both impossibly new and achingly familiar.

I didn’t know where this was going, or if it even could go anywhere, but right now, all I cared about was the feel of his lips on mine, his hands holding me like they had always belonged there.

Like I had always belonged with him.

-- Eh guys... I think I need a part 3 to wrap it up. What do y'all think? --

Please like, share or comment when you liked the story. If you liked this, please check out my masterlist for other stories.

Tag list:-> If you want to be added let me know what you like to read! If anyone feels like you're tagged too much, also let me know please. :)

@kr804573 @nancymcl @suckitands33 @mostlymarvelgirl @globetrotter28 @jackles010378 @hobby27 @winchesterwild78

@deans-baby-momma @soab1967 @livingdeadblondequeen @ladysparkles78 @whimsyfinny @lmg14 @yvonneeeee @ninii-winchester @spxideyver @n-o-p-e-never

[storiesfromafan]

MIA - Buck x Reader

A/N: so I am back with part 2 to Rumours. Not sure how I feel about this...but it will have to do haha. I will do a part 3, and that will be it.

Forgive me if any information is wrong, as I had to change a few things around to suit the story. As well as any spelling and grammer mistakes 😅

Tag list: @strayrockette (you asked for angsty, hope I met the requirement...maybe lol)

October 8th 1943 was a day you wouldn't forget. Starting with waking to this foreboding feeling gnawing at the back of your mind. And with every minute of the passing morning your stomach sinking further and further. Something was to happen that day, which usually meant death, injury and despair with a mix of grief.

Earlier that morning the 100th had flown out on a raid. It was like they normally would, no one would have guessed the out come of their return. You had spent the morning doing inventory and getting everything ready for the 100th return. If this raid was like any other, there would be some injured men coming into your medical. The Doctor's were waiting, ready for whatever was to come. While the other nurses prepared for what they would see.

When the transport vehicles rolled out, maned by men who were use to everything traumatising and disturbing. You might see the men when they are wheeled in, but to see them as they are pulled from their plane, you don't think you could stomach that. You had over heard a few men telling other female nurses the gruesome details, every stomach churning missing limb and exposed insides. And you can't forget the blood.

Standing with the other nurses and Doctors, with baited breath, you all waited. Ready for action, to help and save lives. You heard the vehicles come flying down the dirt road, the muffled noise of men talking before the cries of those injured. When the doors burst open and the first few men were brought it, you all sprung into action.

You didn't think, you just acted. Moving to help a man who was covered in blood, you looked him over assessing his wounds. He had a few large, deep cuts but none were in any areas of major arteries. But he did had a broken leg and dislocated arm. The sounds he made was hard to listen too, it pulled at your heartstrings. But you kept on moving, doing your job.

When you were done with him you moved on to the next, and then the next, till all that had came in were seen too. Hours went by, it was late morning when you had started, and it was now evening when you finally stopped. Done with your work. Clothing covered in blood, body drained and exhausted. But you felt satisfied, knowing all men were alive. Yet the night would only tell how the worst would fare.

Stepping out of the medical building, the evening breeze hitting your face. Closing your eyes, you inhaled the fresh air into your lungs, a stark contrast to that of the sterile space you had been in. Rolling your shoulders back, you stretched your arms and hands, enjoying how your body creaked and cracked. Your ears took in the faint sounds of the base. Enjoying the sounds around you, unlike what you had listened to, which had been filled with cries, moans, groans and machines for hours.

If only you had been warned not to open your eyes, you could have lived in ignorant bliss. For as soon as you opened them you were greeted to the sight of one Major Egan. The usual boyish charm and cheeky nature gone, replaced with sadness and anguish. That foreboding and sinking pit in your stomach surfacing after being pushed away while you worked. Today was a day you had dreaded. A day that you prayed to never meet.

“It's B-Buck...” Bucky managed to get out, voice hollow and strained. “H-his plane...it-it went down...”

Hearing those words laced in pain, as Bucky did his best to keep himself together. It was like standing there, telling you, made it finally sink in, how real the situation was. The chances were Buck had gone down with his plane, possibly dead. Or he managed to evacuate and was now in enemy territory, which meant death or becoming a prisoner. No matter what way you thought about it, there was a chance of Buck not returning.

You felt the air in your lungs hinder. Breathing in all aspects getting harder. Your chest tightening with the dread you were feeling. You could feel tears rising in your eyes. Bucky looked up from staring at the ground, and upon seeing your reaction to the news, swiftly moved to grab your arm. He led you to a bench near by before helping you sit, then taking the spot next to you.

Everything seemed to fade away, leaving you with an ache in your chest. You couldn't form any words, yet your mind was running wild with them. So many questions that you wanted to ask. Bucky watched you as you stared off into the distance. He understood what you were going through, processing the terrible news. He had been in the same position as you hours before.

Bucky cleared his throat, trying to dislodge the lump that seemed to be sitting there. “I...I thought you should hear the news from me...” his voice was low, trying to be as calm as he could.

You nodded, still having trouble to speak. But the silence between you too wasn't uncomfortable, for you both understood the other right now. Maybe you both needed the other, to work through this moment. A moment that could have come at any time. Bucky knew that, and you both knew Buck knew it. It was part of their job, knowing at any minute they are up in the air, and then the next they would be coming down. With a slim chance of survival in this war.

With time Bucky spoke to you, telling you to clean up and take it easy. Mentioning how he would be having a drink by the planes, if you wanted to join him. Still you hadn’t spoken, but nodded your heard slowly. With that, you shakily got up from your seat and headed back to your room. It was when you were behind a closed door, back resting against the wood, and sliding down to sit on the floor. That was when you finally let your tears free. You broke down, heartbroken and longing to see Buck, even for just one more fleeting moment.

True to his word, you found Bucky that night on the wing of a plane. You had been in your room for ages trying to stop your tears, and only finally was able to get it under control. Not wanting to be alone, you had decided to seek out Bucky. You made your way up to the base of the plane, looking up at the intoxicated man who sat with his feet hanging over the edge of the wing.

“B-Bucky...” you spoke, voice horse and not sounding like yourself. A result from your crying. “Are you alright up there?”

He swayed a little, his head turning down to look to you. “F-fine...I guess" he sputtered.

“Maybe you should come down...” you said concerned for his well being.

Bucky just nodded his head before slowly and a little unsteadily, getting down. With his feet on the ground, you moved to sit you both in front of the plane. The ground was hard, and a little cool, but you both would be fine. Silence filled the space around you, but both happy to take comfort in each other.

With time Bucky began to speak, reminiscing on moments with Buck. He told you how they met and became friends, what they had both gone through up in the air. How he was like a brother to him. And how they both liked being around you, recalling when they first met you. And what he thought about you, and Buck's reaction to you.

“We both liked having you around, you know?” Bucky questioned. “It was nice to have a dance partner that could take a joke" he laughed.

You smiled softly, for the first time feeling happy hearing his words.

“Buck...Buck liked having someone to talk to that was level headed, like him. He told me how close you both were, and I was happy he had you. And when those rumours made the rounds, he was Hell bent on putting an end to them" he chuckled. “Had me wondering...”

You looked at Bucky in confusion. “Wondering what...?”

“You know" he said tilting his head, when you continued to look at him the way you were he went on. “You know...if you and Buck were – well you know”.

You sat up straight at his insinuation. Bucky thought you and Buck were seeing each other privately, and engaging in inappropriate behaviour. “N-no, not at all" you replied quickly.

“But you do have feelings for him, right?” Bucky asked, looking you in the eye. “He came back after speaking to you, he didn't say it but I could tell something went down between you both, right?”

You averted your eyes from his. Deciding there was no reason to hide it, you nodded your head. Out of all the people on the base, Bucky and Buck were to two you could trust. And it looked liked you only have Bucky left.

“I knew it...I think he cared for you. But with Marge, he was devoted to her...” Bucky thought out loud. “Watching you both, I could see something there...but you're both so good, to do anything to hurt someone...”

You didn't understand what the Major was getting at. Deciding it was time for him to get to bed, you voiced it. “Alright Bucky, I think its time you get some rest”.

You moved to help him up, but Bucky protested, almost having a child like fit. But with a little bit of talking to him, you were able to talk him into it. With his arm over your shoulders, you helped get Bucky back to his room, before leaving him at his door. Reluctantly you headed back to you room. Once in bed you had wanted to sleep, but it was something that you got next to none off. How your sleeping pattern would be from here on out.

The course of the next few weeks seemed to be following a steady path. But, once more, you are struck with bad news. First Buck, now Bucky. His plane going down and with that, the last of your hope for everyone else. You cried and thought of the Major, but no where near as it had been for Buck.

Lost to war were two strong men. Who didn't deserve what they got. No more mischievous and anger inducing moments with Bucky, whom you would gladly have one more dance with, only to have him make you laugh. No more electrifying discussions with Buck, were you would enjoy looking into his stormy blue eyes, that caused butterflies to swarm your stomach. Now it was an empty pit, with a chest to match.

A/N: one of my favourite moments was Buck dancing with Meatball 😍

[zsakuva]

hey saku! not sure if you've ever been asked questions along these lines before- either way, here you go!

1. What's your favourite part of the process of creating an audio? (writing, recording, SFX etc) and why is it your favourite?

2. what's your favourite character to record and why?

Constructing the idea and the latter part of editing.

Constructing the idea: Because that's when my mind does its thing! I set the limitations and wonder about characters. It's so much fun to discover and create new things, and worldbuilding is a part of it too. For my personal projects, I've spent months purely worldbuilding, and I always find it exciting. For audios, the confines I work in are stricter, but crafting a story within it never gets tiring!

Editing: I hate editing the raw voice. It takes hours for me. What I do love is adding the pieces together. Layering the soundscape, fitting in the SFX, and building the auditory world is amazing! It's as if you're listening to the world come alive, and I can't help but smile every time. I've felt the most satisfaction after listening back to The Noble Trials episodes because of the added soundtrack. I can only create the atmosphere from my own imagination, but when I can honour it and see it all the clearer, it's a wonderful feeling!

2. I think... currently, it's Zaros. I just love his character, the accent I gave him, and the tones I can play with. But Dontis is a very close second.

[saintsbuffy]

You’re an angel, i’m a dog.

Pairing: Lucanis/Rook Lucanis/Rook/Spite

TW: injury detail, heavy sexual references, abuse, grief, suicidal idolisation, implied non con, spite being a freak, possession, substances.

Word count: around 5000

Chapter: 2/?

2 - DEVIL LIKE ME

— Rook is injured, Lucanis tries to help.

Lucanis - Bold

Spite - Italics

We've been waiting for this haven't we.

Spites familiar voice echos in Lucanis's head, the feral creatures nails claw his mind as the shadow figure takes form beside him.

Rook tentatively approaches as Lucanis glances around the room before pulling over a large crate for him to sit on and gesturing for Rook to take the armchair opposite him. Even though the crate is slightly too small for him and a few inches shorter than the chair it manages to hold his weight and leaves him eye level with her.

She's watching him and he moves the equipment to one side, careful to pick up any glass shards as he piles tubes and viles into a corner and stacks the books clearing the space between them. His face remains a mask of ease but she can't help but notice the small bead of sweat that forms at his brow. When was the last time he had hosted a girl in his room? He couldn't remember. Come to think of it, when was the last time Lucanis had hosted anyone in his room?

Lucanis shifts in his seat, crossing and uncrossing his arms. He had always been bad at making small talk but now he felt like he'd forgotten how to speak entirely. After a moment the silence is broken by a low humming noise, some variation of a song his grandmother would sing to him many years ago. The noise fades in and out but Rook dosent react, Lucanis is the only one who can hear it.

Quiet.

The girl is studying he realises. Head cocked to one side she watches how he moves and breathes, her guard his up, her discomfort increasing and yet she dosent make a move to leave.

"So..." Rook rests her arms on the oversized chair, one knee crossed other the other, fingers tapping on the edge. "Are you going to tell me how you did that thing out there." She raises her hand and seems to be trying to project her power but all he sees is empty air.

He had felt her magic approaching of course, the thrum of power had given him plenty of warning. The spell she had encountered had taken almost a decade to perfect, he had spent countless hours working on it with his Cousin. The barrier could be locked to one room and only lasted as long as the creator was present. It was supposed to keep out any magic users that didn't possess the Dellamorte bloodline. Clearly it was faulty if Rook had gotten through. He'd have to ask Illario about that when he next saw him.

"I am not entirely sure." Lucanis takes in the way her eyes waver, she doesn't seem annoyed that the spell had managed to stuff her magic but curious, perhaps slightly hopeful? "I do not use many spells, my specialities lie more in weapons and potions. My cousin helped with this one, you might have seen him around.”

She can see that from the display on his desk to the objects that fill his room and line the shelves, a few swords hanging on rusty nails that stick out of the stone.

"Ah, the handsome one." Rook recalls, as he shoots her an unamused look. "So could you, create a spell or a potion to stop it?"

"Why would you want to stop it?" He queries watching the way her hand goes to a chain around her neck, the small opaque crystal attached to it resting just between her breasts, Lucanis moves his eyes away quickly. His gaze goes back to her face then to the wall behind her as he avoids her eye contact.

He had seen the necklace before but had never gotten a good view of it, in fact he could not recall a time he seen her without it. No bigger than a marble, the edges jagged but dull enough to not cut into her skin. Whatever it was it meant something to her. Another piece of the puzzle.

"I mean, to help control it. Like the way your daggers seem to hold power, I can't have another mission go sideways because of me." A half truth.

He does not have to look her in the eyes to know that's not exactly what she meant.

"Perhaps you should ask Emmrich about that kind of stuff, maybe he could make you some sort of object to hone your energy."

In his time here Lucanis had seen the man do incredible things with his gifts, he had even come to him for help occasionally to identify any objects found whilst out on missions.

"I don't think that would work." Her lips pull into a grimace as she continues to fiddle with the silver chain. "And besides i'm not really sure how to feel about the old man, he frightens me a bit." Rook was both equal parts unsettled and intrigued by the man and his skeletal companion.

Lucanis raises an eyebrow but lets her talk.

"Don't tell him I said that though, you two are friends right?"

She recalls the few times she had watched Lucanis enjoying himself over dinner and drinks, in the library studying whatever it was he was searching for. Out of everyone here the two men seemed to click, both quiet and strange in their own way.

"I do not know him that well." Lucanis does not have friends. He is here to complete his contract and keep his home safe, that’s all.

Misunderstanding his blunt reply as sarcasm, Rook laughs. It's muffled by a hand over her mouth.

His chest tightens, wondering what it would sound like to hear a full true laugh from her. He wanted to find out. There was no question that Rook was attractive. Her elven features mixed the human way she spoke and carried herself made most people find her off putting. She tried to make herself invisible, had spent her first weeks at the Lighthouse brushing off everyone's attempts of inclusion but Lucanis had seen the way she made their companions laugh without even trying, the way her smile lit up a room. She didn't even have to try, he couldn't stand it.

Had the room always felt this small? Of course it had he was sleeping in a dammed storage closet for gods sake.

The desire that coiled low in his stomach was not as easy to ignore now as it was when he'd first laid eyes on her. All it takes is one moment of wanting and a mirror image of Lucanis draped in shadows manifests through the table. The creature contorts and twits its body, limbs cracking into place until it's crouched beside Rook. Lucanis closes his eyes reaching deep inside to sever that tie between man and demon but it's already started to knot. The door a-jar.

Lucanis grits his teeth as Spite inspects her, but the more he tries to shut him out the more the demon takes form. His discomfort and Rook's distraction only seems to make Spite more excited as it moves from side to side head twisting like a starved animal about to feast.

I can see why you're so fascinated by her. Such a pretty little thing.

Spites hand is less than an inch away from caressing Rook's cheek, hand going, lower, lower, until it comes to rest just below where Lucanis can't see under the table. Lucanis lets out a disgruntled cough, clearing his throat then scoots his crate back from table.

Spite's eyes snap up at him, and it lets out a laugh the look of hunger fading into a feline grin.

Leave us. Do. Not. Touch her.

You can't make me.

If you're going to stay, be quiet and behave.

Spite lets out a whine and glares back at him but obeys hands up in surrender as those glowing eyes ablaze. Some days Lucanis could push him out if he really tried. It would take all his strength and then some but each day was different. Recently the active days seemed to be outweighing the quiet ones. It had taken him years to train his mind against the demon, to build up walls and keep the doors locked. But no matter how badly Lucanis wanted him gone he would always let Spite back in.

There was no one without the other, they depended on each-other for survival. He had wasted almost his entire life trying to find a cure for this curse placed upon him and had come to accept the grim fact that if he wanted to live, Spite would be along for the ride.

Fine, fine. She's all yours. I won't touch her...unless she asks us to.

Lucanis stands to his full height kicking back the crate, he moves through the shadow demon purposefully causing the the smoke to separate. As Spite's form reconstructs itself it watches him as he places two china cups onto the table, both different sizes and designs. Rook lets out a small yawn as she waits, utterly unaware of the domestic currently playing out between the demon and the man as she watches Lucanis. There's a clattering of boxes being moved and rearranged then he lights a flame under what appears to be some sort of homemade stove. After a few minutes he returns with a steaming pot and the smell of coffee fills the small room.

Rook holds out her cup for him as he pours out the dark brown liquid until it reaches the top then fills his own. Now that he's closer she can see the black power under his nails, a cluster of tiny white scars standing out in contrast against his tan skin. She wants to ask about the experiment he was doing when she had interrupted him earlier or pry more about her magic but it's late and she's exhausted. Shes beginning to ajust to the dim candle light, the subtle warmth the flames gave off as the occasional gust of cold air moved past her and the presence of the man sitting opposite her.

Sure, it was a bit awkward and she wasn't sure if he was utterly repulsed by her or just had invited her out of civility but Rook had been searching for a distraction from her restless sleep and she had found one. They didn't need to speak, to fill the silence, just being in each others presence was enough. Maybe it was the adrenaline wearing off that had made her feelings intangible but could swear she felt a strange sort of comfort when she was with him.

Instead of voicing the million questions she yearned to have answered Rook leans back in her seat against the worn velvet and lets the cup warm her hands as raises the it in a thanks then takes a sip. It's bitter and warm, not hot enough to burn but the taste leaves an unwelcome flavour on her tongue. The disgusted expression on her face forms because she can stop it. Lucanis is waiting for her reaction.

"What? No milk or sugar?" Rook's voice sounds strained as she gulps down the liquid mid sentence forcing herself to take another sip.

She'd had coffee before, at the training camp it was valued as much as gold. But that had been a watered down version, reheated and shared between large groups, whatever Lucanis had was strong and fresh. Perhaps this was another thing she'd have to adjust to.

The corner of Lucanis's mouth raises, those full lips forming an almost smile as he watches her drink before trying his own.

"I like it black." He states before refilling his cup.

Rook hides another nervous laugh and gives him in a look that says of course you do. She would not make a very good spy he thinks.

She coughs as she reaches the bottom of the cup wiping a hand over her mouth before placing it down and pushing it slightly away from her. A fake smile of gratitude plastered across her face.

"Thanks for the coffee, and the company."

Lucanis's doesn’t seem to register the comment, his gaze entirely focused on the spot just behind where she sits, eyes occasionally flicking to check that she hadn't moved then back again to not so empty space. The humming song starts again.

There an obviously tension between Rook and Lucanis but neither of them quite wants the moment to end. Lucanis had never been very good at making friends, hell, he struggled enough as it was to keep loose acquaintances. But since he would be staying here for the foreseeable future he might as well try to be civil with her. He couldn't leave now, not when he was so close to finding a cure, not when he and his cousin had a chance at freedom, not when this girl was before him could be the key to everything. Regardless of his intentions Rook had played a part in his rescue and he would be indebted to her until the contract was completed.

I think she's starting you like you. Thats a first, should we tell her what we really are?

I thought you were staying quiet.

How can I when I can hear all your thoughts. I wonder what she would say if you told her what you want to do to her-

Spite seems to forget what it was saying as the creature stops mid taunt, turning in a circle sniffing the air its hollow eyes turn from Lucanis to Rook and back again.

Oh, this is going to be fun.

Lucanis's temple is throbbing as he rubs the palm of his hand against it trying to mask the feeling with more questions. If he could keep her talking for long enough maybe he could gain back enough control for Spite to leave them.

"When you have these nightmares, what do you see. Tell me about them."

Straight to the point then. Rook thinks, it would be easy for her to lie about it but she has nothing to lose.

"You want me to help you or not?" Lucanis barks out when Rook doesn't immediately answer. He doesn't mean for his tone to come out like that, cruel and disingenuous. Every step he makes towards Rook feels like another two back into the dark.

"Sorry-" She starts only to be cut off by his raised hand.

"Stop apologising." He shuts her down. "Just start from the beginning, anything you can remember might help us to better understand your...situation. When did they start."

She should be sorry, she was a Mage who had killed tens, if not hundreds of innocent people. Even if she had been following orders, even if it had been an accident, she had killed, no man would ever mourn one less Mage in the world.

You have more blood on your hands than she does.

I take no pleasure in killing, unlike you.

It’s impolite to lie Lucanis. I know you get off on it as much as I do. Oh look you've made her cry…

Spites observation panics him for a moment but when he looks at her there's no tears present. The only evidence of sadness is a fait sheen to her pale eyes, that haunted look he had seen before in the mirror on his own face. Greif.

As Rook recalls her nightmares and the memories that interlinked them she wished, not for the first time that they had left her to die in that rubble. How was it fair that the gods got to pick and choose who gets the power of creation, of life and who gets that of death and destruction. How she longed to be able to bring her friends back from the dead, reach down upon the earth and feel the roots grow.

"I think they must have started when I was a child but I could never remember anything, only waking up to find myself screaming. The night after the first time my magic manifested there was a thunderstorm, I started dreaming about this woman, I can't recall her face but it was like she was glowing in green flame."

Lucanis's focus is wavering as he tries to hang onto each of her words, something about green flames, a wolf, the sound of thunder, demons and the veil. His time is running out. The pain was behind his eyes now, vision blurring as he blinked over and over trying to shut it out.

"Lucanis." Rooks voice brings him back for a moment. "Are you alright?"

Smells like blood.

Get out of my head.

Can't you smell it? Let us taste her, just this once.

I said, GET OUT.

But Spite was right. The metallic tang in the air was undeniable, he could smell it. A shudder of dread snapped him back into reality. He was looking at her how, really looking. Had Rook always looked this pale? Her eyes were hollow, sunken in slightly and ringed with grey. Her lips parted as she paused mid sentence.

"You are bleeding." Lucanis's voice startles her as she has a moment of confusion before the realisation sets in.

She shifts the seat back a few inches looking down at herself before placing her hand to where the black shirt was sticking to her side. When she brings it away her palm is covered with a fresh coating of blood. Her mouth forms a silent 'oh' as she places her hand back against the wet shirt and holds it in place.

Before Lucanis can stop her she stands up swaying slightly using her free hand to steady herself against the table as he rushes to her side, the crate he was sat on lets out a screech against the stone as he flys across the room towards her.

Told you I smelled blood.

"LEAVE US." He doesn't mean for those words to be voiced aloud. Lucanis's voice comes out through gritted teeth, if Rook notices him speaking to the air she doesn't react - too focused on trying not to pass out.

It's not the blood that makes Lucanis feel like he's going to throw up but what comes after. This is how Spite feeds, the demon can't touch her in its usual state but pain, death and bloodshed calls to it the way a holy man might call upon the gods. When in battle the bond between Spite and Lucanis is forged from violence, all it takes is for the first kill to commence and then two become one. Most days the demon can do little more than cause him headaches with taunts and mind games but in battle Spite can take over fully possessing him and using Lucanis's body as a vessel for violence.

He wasn't sure if Rook's injuries would be enough to let Spite in all the way there was no rule book for this kind of thing but he didn't dare send her away. Not when she was in so much pain, not when seeing her in pain caused him so much.

With one arm under hers and the one carefully hooked around her waist so not to touch the wound he guides her to the table and holds up her weight against his own until her legs secure against it, the table is low enough that when he pushes her back slightly she's able to sit on it without much strain.

"Keep pressure on the wound." He leaves her for just a moment hurrying across the room and pouring out something that look like water onto his hands then wiping them clean on his sheets.

Lucanis was not healer but had learnt survival young and patched himself up after many a battle. He had been nine the first time he'd had to fix a dislocated bone, thirteen when he learnt how to stitch his own wounds.

Rook winces as she feels the throbbing pain grow, her skin heating as sweat begins to coat her skin. She has no idea how long it’s been bleeding or when the stitches had ripped. It was as if until she saw the blood there had been no pain and now it felt like she had an arrow in her side all over again.

When Lucanis returns he's holding a pile of clean cloth and a bottle of clear liquid. "I'll need to redress the wound and clean it."

Rook continues to look down at her side fingers now slick with her own blood she acknowledges him with a faint noise that he can’t make out.

"I need you to look at me. I don't think Varric will forgive me if I let you bleed out on my table." That earns a pained laugh. "This is going hurt." He adds.

"Okay." She nods again this time meeting his eye as Lucanis hand holds her chin to look at him. Defiance lives in her eyes but she agrees to let him help her, this is a woman who does not want to be pitied or saved. He knows exactly how that feels.

Lucanis lets her go and pushes his sleeves up further until the material can't go any higher up his biceps. With little effort he rips the cloth into strips and places it onto the table beside her along with the bottle. Slowly, cautiously, he stands infront of her assessing the situation. Rook moves her body slightly so that she's turned half to the side giving him better actress to her and her hand beings to pull up the bottom of her shirt.

"Do you want me to stop, it's not too late. I can wake one of the others-"

"No it's fine." Rook cuts him off. "It really doesn't hurt that much." Her face says otherwise.

It would be easier for him to remove her top completely but the thin material leaves little to imagination, it's clear Rook wears nothing underneath. Instead Lucanis pulls a dagger from his belt and cuts away at the ruined fabric leaving only enough to cover her. The bulk of the bandages are almost completely soaked through. As he unbinds them from her ribs and throws them onto a pile on the floor Rook swears when the wound is exposed to the cold air.

We could have her right now, on this table.

"It's not as bad as I thought, but you're to need to sit still for the next part. Drink this." He holds the bottle up to her lips and lifts it so she can drink, one hand underneath to catch anything that spills.

Rook splutters and coughs as it burns the back of her throat but takes a few gulps as Lucanis lets out a loose a breath.

With the old bandages removed and blood wiped clean he can now see only three out of the eight stitches had torn open, and other than the irritated red skin around the wound there’s no sign of infection.

"That was fucking disgusting. Do me a favour and just keep talking. If I don't pass out from this, I might die if you serve me anymore beverages." Rook states, eyes closed as she lets out a low whimper whilst Lucanis begins to wipe away the blood. “And if I die.” As grits her teeth. “I will come back and fucking haunt you.”

Such dirty words for such a pretty mouth.

Don’t look at her.

Imagine the sweet sounds she would make.

"I'm not very good at talking." Lucanis confesses, undeterred by her empty threats.

He doubts very much that she would want to hear about how he'd spent almost his entire childhood being experimented on in a cage by the only maternal figure he'd never known.

"Oh i've noticed." Her eyes are wide and alert now, pupils dilating. "Seriously say anything, sing a song tell me a story, make something up. Tell me about possessed life, I bet he's here isn't he, the demon, is he here? Is he a he?"

Rook might not have been thinking clearly to start but now she’s racking her brain for everything she learnt about this man so far. Not only was she about to let an almost stranger - at best coworker, operate on her in a storage cupboard she was about to let a man possessed by a demon to do it. Other than overhearing Neve refer to the demon as 'Spite' once she had no idea if that was its name or what it even was.

Did demons even have pronouns?

"It's here, it likes the blood." If Lucanis was trying to comfort her he was failing miserably.

From the corner of his eye Lucanis can see spite crouching beneath the table, its slightly see through finger poking at the small pool of blood on the ground. Despite the finger going through the blood and stone floor Spite puts it into its mouth and pretends to lick the finger clean.

Delicious.

"Great, well there's plenty of that here. Sounds like a charming guy." Rook lets her head fall back and stares up at the ceiling as she waits for Lucanis to fishing threading the needle.

Lucanis bites down on his bottom lip as he finishes threading the needle then sterilises the wound with what smells like alcohol. He dabs at the blood with no warning and she clutches back as it stings sending shivers down her spine that make her want to kick him.

"What does it feel like?" She asks the corners of her eyes glistening but again, no tears fall.

"At first I thought my soul had been split in half. But now, it’s more like having two sets of hands instead of one, eyes in the back of my head. The power is…unimaginable."

He pulls her skin together holding the flesh with a forefinger and thumb as the needle pushes through for the first stitch. Over rooks deep breathing he swears the faint sound of thunder booms overhead.

"I have heard sories of demons that can possess men. The Grey Wardens knew a lot about dark magic. How did you come to be this way? I mean what happened to you. You weren't born like this, were you?" Rook seems to be sitting straighter now, the tonic kicking in and numbing some of the pain.

"That-Is none of your concern."

"Does it hurt?" Rook knows she should probably change subjects from the strain in his voice but when she looks up at him the answer is written all over his face.

"Yes and no." The look of agony is gone in seconds and he's back to concentrating on her wound.

His hair despite being tied back falls over his shoulder as is long enough that she feels it brush against her bare skin. She can feel his warm breath against her torso and the occasional faint tickle of his beard as he gets too close.

"Does it hurt right now?" Rook wonders looking around the room as if she would find a demon spawn hiding in the shadows, but she sees nothing.

"You don't have to worry about me. You are the one bleeding."

The second stitch is though.

"I'm bleeding all over your bedroom and you won't even tell me how you got possessed by a creepy demon, wow." Rook tries to make an exaggerated gasping sound but it's cut short as the third stitch goes though and the wind is knocked out of her. "Fucking ouch."

"You are very dramatic." He was glad she couldn't see his faint smile as he continued to work.

This was good, if she’s was coherent enough to make jokes and swear at him hopefully she wouldn’t pass out anytime soon. Lucanis makes a mental note that Rook often uses humour as cover when she's hurt.

The pain has faded to a dull ache now, Rooks body already starting to feel a bit stronger with each passing moment but her mind is still hazy. She’s trying to stay awake but all she can think about was how wants him to never stop talking. Each word keeps her tethered to this plane. That accent, she could listen to it forever.

“We are almost done.” Lucanis moves closer to her - his large body is almost completely covering hers as he leans so that he can tie the bandages around her back. He stops half way realising he can't quite reach it without the possibility of hurting her. Rook feels his hand lightly touching her shoulder indicating which way she needs to move as she swings her legs back round to give him better access.

Now Rook sits on the other side as he leans over, legs hanging over the table, back facing him. He doesn't mean to stare when he looks down at her exposed back but there's no helping it as his eyes travel from the bottom of her spine to the top of her half ripped shirt and the array of scars that covered almost every inch of skin in between. Some more faded than others, the freshest couldn't have been more than a year old. Each one thin and precise line, this had been no accident, she had either been forced to take a beating or let someone do this to her.

"Arms up." He instructs as she strains lift them with little protest but manages to keep them held in place long enough for him to loop the cloth around.

He begins to tie the fresh bandages around her, one hand laying flat across her ribs to keep them in place. The rough contrast of the tips his fingers brush against the exposed skin above her bandages. Once he's sure the bandages are tight enough he feels himself moving without thinking. Rook doesn't react as a finger traced the outline of a particularly deep bit of scar tissue that falls almost directly in the centre of her spine.

He had seen this kind of torture before, often inflicted on disobedient soldiers or deserters. It was possible to get rid of most scars and wounds with certain kinds of magic, for cosmic or personal reasons he had seen it done more than once. But some were not as easy to remove as others and perhaps she had chosen to keep them as a reminder for what had been done to her. He shouldn’t care, it was none of his business.

He could feel the demonic energy that ran in his veins drumming under his skin as he flexed his hand by his side. He was only human-ish after all.

Who did this to you? He wondered. I will make them beg for my blade. He should have no right to care. He had done that and worse to his own enemies, what made seeing it on her so different? Spite who had had been suspiciously dormant the entire time Rook had her wounds tended to was now flicking in and out of existence behind her. The demon Rook from its crouch by her side and for once the demon had nothing to say.

They were both thinking the same thing.

"These are not from battle." Lucanis states as he pulls the cut up edge of the shirt back down to cover what he can see of her side.

"No, they are not." Rook answers as she moves off the table to stand. Her cheeks have more colour to them now he notices as she refuses his help when she steadies herself. "Thank you, I think i've ruined your night enough. I should get going now."

Lucanis accepts her thanks with a nod not sure what to do now. He wants to ask her to stay. Only so he can keep an eye on her incase the wound gets worse of course. He couldn't exactly offer up his bed, a girl like her deserved to sleep on beds of silks and feathered mattresses.

In his first week at the Lighthouse he had been given a large room in the north wing with a plush four poster bed and a dozen pillows. It had felt like he was suffocating in the comfort of that bed, he had tried removing all the bedding on the second night. Placing the mattress on the floor on the third then welcoming the cool stone against his bare back on the fourth. None of it had worked. He felt like a dog without the comfort of its cage. It had been years since he'd slept on anything more comfortable than a couple of crates pushed together with a blanket over the top. Not that he slept much as it was.

As Lucanis begins to put away his things he can feel eyes on him as Rook stands as if she's waiting for him to say something. "Right, of course." Lucanis clears his throat then grabs something off his bed and passes it to her. "Get some rest if you can, i'm no healer so you should probably get somebody to look at that in the morning if you can."

Rook takes the shirt from him and begins to pull her old ruined one over her head with one hand as Lucanis turns to give her some privacy. He can feel his blood heating as the awareness that she’s half naked in his room sinks in. She places the discarded top on the pile of bloody cloth and bandages and cringes as she takes in the mess around the room. Dried blood on the floor, glass on the table, the door hanging on its hingers. After today she didn't think she would ever be able to face him again.

His cream collared shirt reaches her mid thigh, the size of it looking ridiculous on her. She was shorter than the average elf and even though Lucanis was tall for a human he only had a few inches on her but his build had made the shirt seem least thrice her normal size. When she finishes dressing Lucanis is still facing away from her - arms resting against the table as he tried not to think about what Rook might look like in his shirt. He can hear Spites perverted thoughts begin to pile up in his mind making him want to flip the table and its contents scores the room. Instead he re arranging his work and places the books back onto the table as he finishes cleaning off any trace of blood, any trace of her.

"Goodnight, Rook." Lucanis mumbles.

The way he says it sounds like goodbye. So this was it then.

"Goodnight."

Rook waits a few more seconds to see if he will turn back and then, she’s gone.

end chapter notes -

everyday i learn something new about his family and backstory (thanks twitter)

this chapter was only meant to be 3k long but i ended up writing about 6k and cutting it down a bit, their dynamic is so fun to write. anyone has information, head canons or theories about him pls share id love to hear them!

do we hate grandma or not? (i think we do)

as always @/saintscain on twitter, hope you enjoyed

[labellefleur-sauvage]

Random Sentence Generator Drabble Series, #1:

"The raccoon in the backyard was digging up my garden"

I feel like I've been doing the same thing, writing-wise, for months now (one shot after one shot, complete, but needing to be edited, plus a longer fic) and I wanted to try writing something quick, without thinking about it too much. I couldn't find any drabbles or writing prompts that looked interesting, so I found a random sentence generator and the above prompt was one of the first ones I got.

I'm going to try doing more drabbles as a way to practice writing, hopefully in more pairings. If anyone has any weird, wild or unhinged prompts or drabble ideas, my ask box is open!

Elain and Lucien, about 1200 words, G rating

Lucien felt Elain’s anger flare across their bond, brighter than the sun, and it stole his breath away.

He nearly stumbled and fell in the middle of the crowded street in Velaris. They’d only been mated a few blissful months, but he had yet to encounter this strong of an emotion from his mate.

It wasn’t just anger he felt - it was pure rage, complete frustration, and utter hatred.

Lucien sent a quick prayer to the Cauldron that these feelings from his mate weren’t directed at him, then he winnowed home to their small cottage on the outskirts of the city.

“Elain?”

The house was quiet and still as he entered. Everything looked normal; nothing was broken or missing, none of the possessions that made this space a home gone.

“Elain?” Lucien called out again, walking further into their house.

An answering growl, so unlike anything he’d ever heard, floated out from their small study in the back of the house. Hurrying, he entered to find Elain standing at the large window that overlooked their garden.

“Elain, what’s wrong?”

“They’re here.”

Her poster was rigid, her fists closed tightly at her sides. She glared intently at her pristine garden. Standing next to her, Lucien could have sworn he felt heat, so similar to his, radiating off her.

Lucien looked outside to their empty garden. “Uh, who’s here?”

“The monster destroying my garden.”

“Er,” Lucien said, looking outside again. There was nothing there besides her gorgeous flowerbeds filled with all manner of beautiful flowers, plants and herbs.

“I don’t see anything.”

“It scurried away when it heard you come home, but they’re still there, waiting. I can feel it.”

“Are you alright?” he asked, touching her forehead. “You’re a bit warm. When’s the last time you drank some water?”

“Yes, I’m fine!” she snapped, brushing his hand away. “And be quiet! It can hear you!”

“Who can hear us?”

“The raccoon in the backyard digging up my garden! It’s already destroyed my petunias and obliterated my kale, and it’s going for the arugula next, I just know it.”

“A raccoon?” Lucien couldn’t stop the laugh that erupted from his mouth. “I didn’t realize Velaris had raccoons.”

A simple raccoon? That’s what had Elain so angry?

He stopped laughing when his mate turned her thunderous gaze towards him.

“I’m sorry dear,” he apologized, schooling his features into concern and gazing outside. “How long have these beasts been terrorizing you?”

“Weeks,” Elain gritted out. Her hands clutched the wooden banister in front of her so hard it started to crack. “It knows I know it’s there and terrorizing my plants, and it keeps coming back. It knows my schedule, when I’m not home, and that’s when the little bastard strikes!”

Lucien looked at Elain nervously. “Elain, dear, it’s a raccoon. It couldn’t possibly know your schedule or when you’re not here -"

“Oh, it most certainly does. I can just imagine it scheming away, plotting out the ways it can ruin my life.”

“Yes, I’m sure this raccoon keeps a daily calendar filled with all manner of ideas meant to torment you,” Lucien muttered sarcastically.

“Yes, exactly! They have those creepy little hands, I wouldn’t put it past it!”

“Elain, that was a joke, I wasn’t seriously saying -"

“Shut up, shut up!” Elain gasped excitedly, thwacking his chest to get him to be quiet. “It’s back! Look!”

Elain and Lucien peered out of the window and watched as a plump raccoon scampered over to Elain’s garden. Lucien watched, dumbfounded, as the animal perused its offerings, like it was inspecting the available goods at a market, before settling itself in front of a leafy green and digging its hands in the rich soil.

“I knew it was going to go for the arugula! It’s the perfect springtime salad green!” Elain’s eyes were bright with vindication. She looked slightly crazed as she surveyed the interloper dig up her plants.

“Look at those grubby little hands,” she seethed. “I spend months growing my garden and it thinks it can just pop over any time it wants to sample my hard work?!” Lucien swore he saw one of Elain’s eye twitch.

“We can put up a fence or a ward,” Lucien said soothingly, rubbing a gentle hand up and down her back. “I’m sure there’s lots of options for keeping a raccoon out of a garden.”

“I don’t just want it kept away - I want it gone. This means war. This means -"

Elain gasped as a second raccoon waddled up to the one in the garden. Without wasting a beat, it started pawing at the ground next to its companion.

“It has a friend?” Elain exclaimed in horror. “Not one, but two of them, taking my plants! This, this is a siege! We’re being invaded! I didn’t know raccoons had friends!”

“Perhaps more than a friend,” Lucien said quietly, as they watched four little raccoon babies tumble out of a bush and make their way across the lawn to their parents. The raccoon digging up the arugula immediately picked up its babies and brought them to the dirt, showing them how to dig their little paws into the soil.

All the anger Elain - and Lucien, through the bond - felt melted immediately, replaced with delight.

“Babies?” she said quietly. “They’re a family?”

They watched in silence as the raccoon family took their fill of Elain’s garden before scurrying away. Lucien looked at Elain out of the corner of his eye and saw her wipe a tear away.

“Well, it is technically worse than you thought.” He brought Elain into a one sided hug next to him, squeezing her gently. “Would you like me to go about setting a ward to keep them out?”

“No, of course not!” Elain looked up at him in outrage. “They’re a poor family with babies who have to resort to stealing from gardens, we’re not going to shut them out!”

Lucien raised an eyebrow. “You just spent the past ten minutes plotting your revenge against those raccoons.”

She blushed slightly. “Yes, well, that was before I learned they have lots of little mouths to feed.” She looked around the room. “I need to visit Nesta.”

“Nesta? What -"

“I need to do research what foods raccoons eat so I can grow things they like!”

“Uh, Elain,” he said warily, watching her throw on a discarded cardigan, “I don’t think we should be encouraging this kind of behavior.”

She put her hands on her hips. “We’re now responsible for four growing babies! It’d be irresponsible to abandon them!” She turned her large, sad eyes on him, and Lucien knew he was beat. “Would you winnow me up to the House? Please?”

Grinning softly, he walked over to her and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. “Anything for you.”

She smiled up at him, and Lucien lost his breath for the second time that day. “Thank you,” she said softly, then whirled around and ran out of the door. “Give me five minutes!”

Lucien chuckled. All he could feel was Elain’s eagerness and elation through the bond, and it settled him, to feel his mate so happy and content.

If getting to experience Elain so content meant that all he needed to do was help care for a family of troublesome raccoons, then that was a price he was more than willing to pay.

[millidew]

his change in career has captivated me

bonus:

[halflifebutawesome]

MAY 16, 200-

[lovesickeros]

☆ even the gods bleed [ pt 4 ]

{☆} characters arlecchino, furina, lyney {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, multi-chapter, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings blood {☆} word count 3.7k {☆} previous [ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ]

Fontaine was bathed in darkness, not even the moon daring to illuminate where the common man fears to walk. The streets were bleak and empty save for the constant, rhythmic ticking and clanking of machines marching on endlessly, dauntlessly wading where even the bravest dared not to venture. Not even the sharp click of the Gardes boots followed the occasional hisses of steam as they walked the barren streets.

It was haunting, and it'd been like that for days now. It showed little signs of stalling in the slightest, too. Every inch of Fontaine was practically crawling with Gardemeks– like a swarm of rats skittering about.

Arlecchino had secluded herself in the Hotel Bouffes d'ete for days at this point, waiting– biding her time. Her nails clicked against the wood as she tapped at the table in a stilted rhythm, the subtle click of the clock mixing into the clanking outside, weaving in and out of earshot as the patrols slipped by. She reached forward after a moment of thought, reaching for the white king.

She leaned back against the chaise, tilting her head just enough to catch a glimpse of a patrol of Gardemeks as they vanished behind the rows and rows of buildings. It wasn't enough to keep her attention for long, however, her features twisting in disinterest as she glanced back to the chessboard– and the letter neatly resting beside it. The seal was unmistakable and a sobering sight, demanding her attention– the soft hues of blue etched into the shape of a dragon stared back at her in a way that almost unsettled her.

She had already parsed through it's contents hundreds of times, but she was met with only vague, flowing script that only served to irritate her more then anything– it filled the page top to bottom yet managed to say nothing at all. Her hand reached out again, but instead of reaching for the letter she plucked the black rook from the board, setting it down with a soft click.

Arlecchino had all the time in the world to sit back and observe her prey, but all that time would be useless if she lacked the information to act.

And he was quite tight fisted about it, evidentially. None of her inquiries or attempts to decipher any potential codes in the letter left her empty handed. She could not act without even knowing the reason for his summons– it was almost worded like a personal affair rather then one would expect for a foreign diplomat. In truth, she'd expected a scalding report on her operatives, but it lacked any mention of anything of the sort.

She was no stranger to people masking hostility behind pretty words and compliments, not that it was ever unwarranted per se– the Fatui did not create connections through honesty and genuine kindness. They have strong armed more then their fair share of people into cooperation to the point distrust is all the Fatui are met with outside of Snezhnaya. Every word was meant to conceal the deceit, every action meant to conceal the price later paid.

So she had been..skeptical of the letter, to put it lightly. She doubted the Iudex of all people would offer a hand to the Fatui without a price attached– a trap, perhaps, meant to lure in the most powerful piece left on the board. Her eyes narrowed, reaching for a white rook and moving it to the right.

Or he was hiding something. Something that he simply couldn't risk getting out to anyone, not even the Divine themself. A tempting prize, whatever it was.

..A dangerous prize, too.

She'd considered burning the letter and forgetting it all together– the risk was great, and she couldn't risk getting caught up by whoever else the Iudex may have on his side of the board. But she could hardly pass up the challenge and the prize that he fought so hard to keep from prying eyes and ears. Even her agents came back empty handed each time. She lazily picked up a black rook, sliding the white pawn aside.

"Lyney," Arlecchino drawled, crossing one leg over the other and turning her gaze to the door as it slowly creaked open. The pale visage of Lyney stepped through, though his siblings were noticeably absent. The weariness that weighed down on his shoulders was apparent in the slightest furrow of his brows and the subtle creak of leather as he clenched his fists behind his back. "Father." He choked out, the title dragged out by the sharp inhale and shaky exhale.

He looked out of breath, she noted.

The silence that lingered after the small exchange was punctuated only by the click of another chess piece being moved. She sets aside the black rook, letting it sit among the dozen other pieces that had been wiped off the board. She can see the conviction glinting beneath the fog of exhaustion, but if he would utilize it was another matter all together.

He had seemed to make his choice quickly, at the very least.

"Our contacts and operatives within the Fortress of Meropide have gone silent– all we have is their final confirmed missive.." His voice is confident, but it is rigid as the words spill from his lips. He takes a sharp step forward, unfolding his arms from behind his back and opening his hands– the small, water stained and messily folded note catches her eye, plucking it from his palms with a half hearted interest. "They believe the Duke left the Fortress of Meropide..and that he may be coming to the Court of Fontaine."

Her eyes narrow dangerously, nearly crumpling the thin paper in her hands– yet just as quickly, she collects herself.

But she cannot get rid of the bitter taste on her tongue, lingering as she sets down the note and slides it to the side, her lips pursed into a thin line.

So the Iudex had shown one of his pieces..she tightly grasps a black rook, tipping over the white rook, letting it roll against the board.

If the Duke was involved, things were much more complicated then she expected– he would be a problem, she was certain. She couldn't blame the lamb for fearing the wolf, either. Whether her agents had been killed or captured by the man mattered little. He had his ways, and he was a force that could instill fear in even them.

Which meant the possibility that her operation was already compromised was far too real.

What had the Iudex so concerned he had gone through the trouble of bringing in the Duke and herself? The Fatui was one thing, but to specifically request one of it's Harbingers..

The Prophecy? The thought had her clenching her fist, but..no. If it were to rear it's head now, the Iudex could simply not afford to waste time on his contacts deciphering his nonsensical script– If the prophecy were to be the issue, there time would be limited to mere minutes in the worst of cases. Which meant it was worth biding his time in order to ensure absolute secrecy.

So if not the prophecy, then what?

Her next moves were..limited. She was already walking on eggshells considering her position and the reputations of the Fatui– especially with a Harbinger in the midst. If they caught wind of her operations, they'd weed out her operatives and be on guards for any snakes that lingered in their garden.

She reached for the chessboard again, picking up one of the white rooks from the board with a scowl. The sharp click as she sets down the white rook and sets aside the black pawn draws a shaky inhale from Lyney as she moves another black pawn, the dull click of the pieces drowning out the distant clinking of machines.

..A draw, perhaps.

The pieces were all falling into place– the players of this game were slowly being revealed. Whether she could secure her victory..she was unsure.

She wasn't even sure who her opponent was. Only that the Iudex himself was but another piece in their game.

Arlecchino reached for the board again, yet this time she hesitated. Perhaps she could still swipe the win from beneath them, if she played her cards right.

She would simply have to capture the king– or, if need be, let it end on a draw. Either way, she would not concede. She could not afford to concede. Down to the last piece, she would drag out this match until she was in a position to force their hand into the outcome she desired.

She stood slowly, picking up the king piece and observing it for only the briefest of moments before she set it down on the table, taking measured steps around the table and across the room. She was hunting a much more dangerous quarry today– it would be no simple runaway traitor this time.

"Do you remember the directive?" She inquired coldly, her hand lingering on the door for that long, tense moment. "..Yes, Father." Lyney faltered, taking a hesitant step back and bowing at the waist. "Then do not stray."

All that was left was the silence and click of the door shutting behind her as she disappeared down the hall, her boots clicking harshly against the floorboards. The rest of the agents knew better then to linger in her path as she stepped down into the lobby, adjusting the cuffs of her sleeves. She barely even acknowledged the Fatui agent standing at the ready by the heavyset doors, their gloves hands held out with her cloak held loosely in their palms. She quickly snagged it from them, tugging it over her board shoulders and clasping it around her throat.

With a quick tug, she brought the hood up over her head to conceal her sharp features, lifting her hand and placing a neatly folded note within their waiting hands. She had only one chance to make the right moves and secure her victory– no matter the cost.

Each piece had it's purpose.

Oft, that purpose was a bloody and horrible end– but for the grand goal of the Fatui built on the backs of the dead, it was an honor.

She didn't bother speaking a word as she dismissed them with a wave of her hand, pushing open the heavyset doors and stepping out into the barren, damp streets. The rhythmic clink and whir of Gardemeks was still distant– she needed to move. Her boots clicked and splashed in the rain soaked stone of the streets as she slithered between the buildings, ducking through the openings in the patrols.

It was almost too easy.

She tilted her head back, taking in the towering Palais Mermonia with a scowl, her hands clenched into fists. The final moves were being played– the king was within her reach, yet she felt no more confident then when she began.

The air carried a sense of unease, thick and heavy, filling her lungs until she felt her breath still in her chest– listening to the empty, bleak night that seemed so..quiet.

She'd done her fair share of research, had more then her fair share of her agents try to peer into the Iudex's office or the Archon's supposedly hidden chambers, but every attempt was a failure. She had to give them credit, they were quite elusive when they wished to be. Though now she only thought about it bitterly– this was all a risky gamble, in the end, and only time would tell if it paid off.

With minimal effort, she'd managed to pull herself to the flat, tiled roof, eyeing the massive tower peaking out of the center cautiously. At least here the wandering patrols down below weren't likely to notice her..she could hear them passing by the spot she'd been in only a few minutes ago, just beneath her. She pulled the hood further over her face, peering through the sheer darkness of the night for any oddities, but it was almost impossible to see in the dark.

Her boots clicked softly against the tiles as she approached the tower jutting out from the Palais, her hand gliding along the smooth stone, pressing against odd indents or crevices. If it was for the Archon's chambers, she doubted they made it very difficult– she'd only met the woman once, but she doubted the Iudex make it all that complex just from a brief glance. And it surprised her little when one of the stones sunk into the wall, gears whirring as the walls split open to reveal a stairwell straight into an inky black hall. Only the barest hint of light peaked under the door at the bottom, but it's occupants must have heard her, considering it went out not a moment later.

She cautiously stepped down into the small crevice, her breath visible in the bitter cold air– her shoulders tensed at the subtle sound of muffled footsteps behind the door, her vision flaring with a molten heat between her shoulder blades as she reached for the worn handle of the door. The heat of her vision was enough to just barely heat the metal, her vision flaring like a quickly building inferno.

Arlecchino was prepared for a fight, if it came down to it.

The door creaked as she pressed against it, shoving it open with a grunt of effort and surveying the room with narrowed eyes and a biting remark on the tip of her tongue– the lavish opulence was expected, she supposed, but the lack of the towering figure of the Iudex was not.

Yet before she could get a word in or even take in her surroundings properly, the light flickered back on and she had to squeeze her eyes shut with a hiss at the sudden brightness. She could hear the door being shoved closed behind her, the hurried footsteps retreating just as quickly as her eyes adjusted to the light.

..This was a joke, wasn't it? It had to be.

She'd expected the Iudex, perhaps even the Duke if she'd been unlucky, not the Hydro Archon. She had half the mind to test her worth as an Archon then and there, her temper flaring like an uncontrollable blaze, barely kept at bay. It took all her self control to force herself to smile politely at the woman rather then snarl.

"Miss Furina," She sneered beneath her hood, x shaped pupils locked onto the startled, trembling Archon with thinly veiled contempt. "What a..pleasant surprise. You'll have to forgive my manners, I assumed I was meeting with the Iudex." She observed her body language carefully– the way her eyes darted about like a frightened rabbit seeking escape, the slightest tremble of her lips..

Arlecchino opened her mouth to offer another scathing remark, but her jaw audibly clicked shut as her entire body seemed to lock up. Even her vision went cold against her back, a chilling feeling creeping up her spine as someone, or something, crept up behind her. Their footsteps were almost silent, the slight rustling of their clothes the only thing she could hear over her heart pounding against her ribcage.

Arlecchino had always prided herself on being on the other end of that sensation– she was the monster, and her target was the prey frozen like a deer between the hunters crosshair.

It was a chilling feeling to have the dynamic shifted on it's head.

She couldn't even swallow, her jaw clenched so hard she could hear it creak as she tried to reason with her quickly splintering mind– a futile effort, her joints locking up almost painfully. Black spots were quickly swallowing her vision from the lack of air in her lungs, the sound of shuffling behind her barely audible over the ringing in her ears.

For a moment – a moment too long to have only lasted the seconds that it did, yet so quick it gave her whiplash – she thought she would hit the floor dead before she could even glimpse her assailant.

And then it was gone. She came crashing back into reality with a startled inhale, her lungs burning and her knees nearly buckling under her. The instinct to lash out and kill whoever had done it was intense, yet she couldn't bring herself to move even a finger– it would be so easy to twist around and ignite them with searing flames, but her feet were rooted in place.

She almost didn't notice the surprisingly gentle hands unclasping her cloak, tugging it off her shoulders, if not for the sheer intensity of the presence still lingering behind her. Her mind was still fractured, struggling to right itself after the ordeal, and it had her seething.

"..Are you certain you held back enough?" Furina croaked, the normally soft lilt raspy and almost hoarse. "Not– not that I doubt your capability, most Divine!"

Arlecchino felt her nails dig harshly into her palms, heat swelling beneath her skin– Divine? Had she lost her mind? The Divine was..

The Divine was upon their throne where they belonged. She'd seen them!

"Hm. Well, maybe? Sorry, I didn't think it'd affect you too." Their voice was sickeningly soft as they stepped around her like she wasn't even there, focusing their attention on the Archon who seemed more then delighted about it. "What gave you that impression, most Divine? Aha, I..was completely unaffected, as you can see! Perfectly fine."

Furina let out a small squeak when they pinched her cheek, but the almost affectionate smile that tugged at their lips revealed the lack of malice behind the action.

"You're a bad liar, Furina. You might want to sit down..please?" They didn't take her protests for an answer, gently pushing her to sit on the bed before abruptly turning to face Arlecchino once more, a forced smile on their lips. "Oh, good, you're..uh, not dead. That's good. I thought I fried your brain. Sorry?"

..Had she hit her head on the way here? The Divine should still be on their throne, yet she couldn't shake the weight of their stare– it felt tangible. She felt like she was standing face to face with the stars– galaxies and constellations bearing down upon her.

She grit her teeth and clenched her hands until she felt the sting of her nails against her palms, grounding herself in the pain through the sheer overwhelming nature of their existence.

"You.." She croaks, reaching out with a shaky hand and grabbing them by the collar of their shirt, lifting them up until their feet left the floor– she pays no mind to the startled protests of the Archon. Arlecchino would crush her like a bug before she even got the chance to intervene and they both knew it. "You shouldn't exist– you aren't them, and yet you..you're the imposter, aren't you?" Her grip tightens yet they face her without an ounce of fear, meeting her unyielding glare with a pondering look.

Arlecchino wanted to make them bleed just to see if she could, the urge to sink her teeth into skin welling up in her chest to the point she visibly snarled, her mask of politeness long . "You're the imposter." Her expression falls for a moment before she schools it into one of apathy, setting them back down and holding them there for a moment, finally releasing them after a tense moment. "Or you were supposed to be."

Hers brows furrow– she wants to demand answers, to throttle them for damning them to being nothing more then dolls for the supposed Divine to break at their whim, but none of the words come to her.

"..Why now? The current Divine has been in power for years, yet you descend now?" Her shoulders tensed, lips pursed into a thin line– it's impossible to ignore the truth that lay before her. The Divine is a fraud and this..imposter is the true Divine. How many years had they been in power, now? How many years were they waiting? Why did they wait? Was the suffering of Teyvat not enough? Was the blood that painted the steps of their stolen throne not enough?

She'd personally been on the wrong end of the Divine's wrath– she wonders..had they watched? Had they seen the cruel hand of their imposter and turned their back on Teyvat?

"I.." They hesitated. It made her seethe, her hands clenching into fists at her sides– her vision flickered, flames swelling within it's casing just to be smothered by the presence of the Divine. But once that spark had been lit, she refused to let it go out. "I didn't know."

The answer does not satisfy her. There is an itch beneath her skin that she cannot scratch, a fire that burns in her chest so hot it scorches even herself.

"And what about now? Are you content to cower like prey in the safety of the Palais Mermonia?" She snapped, taking a step forward, her brows furrowed and her glare intense– she can see the slightest bit of worry in their eyes. She revels in it. "Will you let them use your acolytes like pawns? How many more need to be broken on the steps to your throne before you act?"

Again, her vision flares and dims– it refuses to be used against the Divine that created it.

"Have you no answer?"

The room is silent. They do not speak and neither does she.

Even the world itself seems to quiet in the face of her accusations, fury boiling to the surface so hot it incinerated all it touched.

"I will kill them myself."

Their words are quiet, but they are not soft– there is a vindictive, searing anger that explodes out like dying stars within their eyes. The sight of constellations replaced by a void that would not be . The smell of ichor grows stronger– to the point she feels almost lightheaded.

"..I am aware that I have failed in preventing this, but I had no choice in the matter. Still," They muse, their voice like the tolling of bells. A solemn melody that stills the swelling fury burning in her chest, if only for a moment. "I will rectify it– I will tear down their throne of lies and let not even the earth tarnish itself by burying their corpse among it's soil."

They pause for a moment, holding out their hand– scarred and bandaged by the weapons of the devout, yet still they take upon the burden of dirtying their hands to save those who did not save them.

"Do you trust me, Arlecchino?"

Did she?

"Will you help me?"

She exhales heavily, meeting the starry iris' of the Divine with a scowl still tugging at her lips. Arlecchino trusted no one but herself.

"..Yes."

[wyvernity]

wip posting just to get something out there, and it's def a mixed bag!! the only thing more inconsistent than my posting schedule is my art style RIP

[shannonsketches]

[casually-salad]

love an only carry you so far, before the burning in your chest turns from pain to rage, little filly.