#i swear it's not my fault!

[maxgicalgirl]

Being a “Fun Fact !” kind of autistic is all fun and games until you get halfway through sharing an interesting tidbit and realize that it probably wasn’t appropriate to share in polite company and now you have to deal with the consequences :(

[hinamie]

someone asked if i had ever drawn gojo with his scars, now i have :>

[swimmingclass1978]

What if reg was an animagi and he could turn into a duck.

Imagine walking down the hogwarts corridor and you see james and sirius being chased by a duck with a wand in its mouth.

Idk just something about fussy duck reg sitting on top of james' head quacking at everyone

[wolfythewitch]

isaac

[neytui]

So i've been playing Devil May Cry por culpa de alguien...

[whowebber]

Every night I say to my family that I am going to sleep early at around 10 PM. And I end up sleeping around 3-4 AM because I lost myself in reading gay fanfictions.

[bettercallcohen]

"She's smart, kind, and quite sophisticated."

𝐍𝐈𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐀 (2023)

[hyacinthsdiamonds]

If Max still has to do community service, can he please be assigned to pick up the trash? Because someone has to rid f1 of these biased stewards and the FIA's inconsistent bull shit.

[talaok]

Until now

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

summary: It's Valentine's day morning, and your husband Joel is telling you all about what he's planned for the day, only he doesn't know you have a surprise of your own.

warnings: smut| oral sex (f receiving), edging if you squint, allusion to baby-making sex, and so much fluff you could drown in it. (No-outbreak!Joel but Sarah doesn't exist in this universe)

a/n: guys this is a lil cringe at times but i was listening to a real hero on repeat while i wrote it so forgive me but a bitch was feeling it

The first thing you felt were lips on your neck, his lips

then came the rest,

his arm wrapped around you, his body pressed to your back, his breath fanning over your neck, his beard stroking your skin, and when you opened your eyes, the soft glow of the morning sun shining through the curtains.

"morning beautiful" 

his voice was hoarse with sleep, muffled by your neck.

"good morning" you smiled, turning your head to look at him, at your handsome, caring, perfect husband who was the only person able to make you smile in the morning.

His deep brown eyes looked up to yours, and the moment they did, his lips turned upwards into a grin as he drank the image before him.

How you looked so beautiful just awake was only one of the many mysteries about you.

"Slept well?" he asked, leaning closer to ghost your lips

"very" You were miraculously able to mumble before he was kissing you like it was the last time he ever could.

His tongue explored and savored every inch of you with the same eagerness and need of teenagers making out for the first time, until a soft giggle climbed your throat, and he leaned away, his hunger satiated ever so little.

"I see someone's wide awake" You bit down a chuckle, repositioning your ass just to ever so slightly grind against the hardness probing from his boxers

he groaned in pleasure before his usual smug smirk took over "that?" he hummed, rubbing his cock against your backside and forcing a little gasp out of your throat "that's jus' what you do to me, sweetheart"

Although you were smiling, you rolled your eyes at that, but before you knew it he was kissing you again, his arm pushing you even closer to him, before he rolled you onto your back, and climbed on top of you.

"happy valentines day" he murmured, another quick peck landing on your lips.

"happy valentines day baby" 

He smiled then, like only you could make him, that same silly smile he didn't know he even had in him before he met you, before you opened his eyes to how amazing life could be, if you only let it.

He hummed as he started descending down your body, worshipping every inch of it with his lips, his tongue, his hands- while you squirmed underneath him, biting down every whimper that begged to be voiced.

"So are you finally gonna tell me what you've planned, mr. romantic?" you asked, your voice breathy as his face traveled to "his favorite place on earth" as he always liked to put it, alternatively called between your thighs.

"mhh" he hummed, licking the inside of your right thigh, making you moan out loud this time "first" he started, continuing to tease you, getting closer and closer to your core, but never really there, "first we're going to the bookstore" he murmured, softly kissing your mound, as a silly smile erupted on your face

"the one that just opened?" you asked, propping yourself on your elbows to get a better look at him

"of course" he smirked, chuckling softly at your reaction "I think you just got wetter"

"shut up" you laughed, but before you could say anything more, his tongue had started tasting you already.

"oh my god" 

"and you can buy as many books as you want" he continued explaining, as you panted beneath him, his mouth alternating between latching to your clit and exploring your slick slit "with no spending limit"

A louder moan spilled from your lips at that, and he smiled, amused.

"a-and then?" you inquired, your hand going to his locks, as you forced yourself to look at him, at your pretty husband bringing heaven to you with his mouth.

"and then we're going to the movie theater" he muttered between laps "They're showing a bunch of those god-awful rom-coms you like"

You giggled through the pleasure, through the happiness.

"You like them too Miller" you teased

"Mhh" he mocked, "Sure I do sugar"

Again, a laugh, the same one he'd never get tired of hearing

"You're a bad liar baby"

He didn't answer, he only started sucking your clit, and all your ability to form coherent sentences dissipated into thin air

"'m not so bad at everything at least" he smirked, slowing down again to torture you just a little longer.

"j-joel" you whined

"don't you wanna know the rest of my plan?"

"yes but later works too"

"agree to disagree," he said, licking your core again and again, until you were soaking the sheets "And then" he resumed from where he left off "we're going to dinner, but where is a surprise"

You were smiling like an idiot.

There he was, your husband telling you all about the day he'd planned just for you.

"You like my plan?"

"I love it baby" you beamed

"yeah?" he grinned, clearly happy "not as much as you're gonna like this"

And then, then in just a few moments, he had pushed you over the edge.

Because he knew your body better than you at this point.

You gripped his hair, nearly ripping them off of him, as you cried out his name over and over until your neighbors probably decided to write you another passive-aggressive note about the "obscene noises" you caused.

You were breathing heavily while he leaned up to cage your entire body with his, your eyes droopy and a sickly sweet beam on your lips matching his.

God what a fool you'd been when you thought you knew what love was. This- this is what love really is. Him. Joel Miller. He's true love.

He kissed you then, pulling you out of your own thoughts as he let you taste all of yourself on his tongue.

"I have a surprise for you too, you know?" you said, your hand on his cheek, softly stroking his beard.

"'s that right?" he smirked

"yup" you nodded, smiling although some tension was taking over your body 

But then again, when you looked into his eyes... at all the love and care in them... it all faded away.

"well first, I'm gonna make you breakfast mister" you murmured, your other hand on his back drawing soft circles "Heart-shaped pancakes and all"

"mhh how romantic" he hummed, kissing your forehead "Thank you sugar"

"and second..." you bit your lip, swallowing thickly 

"what?" he asked, noticing the shift in your demeanor

"I've stopped taking the pill Joel" you murmured "I want to start trying"

And just then, when you saw a spark ignite in his eyes and his mouth fall slack, you knew you didn't have any reason to worry.

You knew he wanted it,

he told you so, but you weren't ready yet, and as always, he had understood, never bringing it up again, until the moment you'd be ready too... until now

"A-Are you-"

"yes" you smiled, watching as slowly, his lips curled more and more into the biggest smile he ever smiled "I'm sure" you promised "I want to have a baby. I want to have your baby, Joel"

"I-" he didn't know what to say, he didn't know if he was dreaming, if he was still alive, he didn't know anything, anything except one thing:

"I love you" he breathed, his eyes blown wide with shock, with joy, with love "I love you so fucking much"

"i love you t-"

But you couldn't end the sentence because his lips were already devouring yours

"I'm gonna make you the pretties mama the world has ever seen darlin'"

Tears were pooling in your eyes as you answered

"better get to work then" you smiled "'cause I know this baby can't wait to meet his daddy"

[daily-odile]

odile in hsr outfits my beloved (ref below)

[hella1975]

noah kahan really said growing up in a small, bitter hometown is about the rage and the hatred that's been sung about many times before but it's also about love and devotion and the 'all three of us were drowning and we didn't know how to save each other but there was an understanding that we were all drowning together' of it all and knowing people so intimately yet not being able to help anyone and he's morally grey at best in a lot of his songs and objectively the bad guy in others and that's just how it is and it's about substance abuse and normalised crime and teen suicide and country roads and failed exams and leaving and being left and love and hate and love and hate and love and

[afterartist]

What if instead of Undertale Multiverse it was Undertale Freakyverse

fellas is it gay to have your arch nemesis that you lowkey have a crush on the hold the entire culmination of your being in his hand as he ties you up and monologues at you

(THIS ISNT KINKY I SWEAR- error is just a freak)

Part of a WIP

[littlecrittereli]

When I was reading the reprogrammed fic and just kinda making my own little gibbits in my head, I for some reason convinced myself that this was the layout of their room

This last one is just how I imagined their little storage spots to look. This one is Chris’s :3

Chris just likes to keep books and clothes nice and organized, and Martin likes to hold legos and little figures and whatnots. Chris likes to hold his trinkets on the shelf next to the beanbag where he can chill/read. The bottom part can also be used as a bedside table since it’s at the same level as the beds.

I also imagine a little nook that sits in the window that Chris likes to sit on when he’s feeling overwhelmed. Martin covered the nook with plushies, blankets, and string lights when he noticed it was a place Chris liked ❤️

I LOVE BEDROOM DECORATION HEADCANONS!!!!! omg the way people decorate their spaces are so cool and you can tell so much about a character by their interior design choices I'm so obsessed actually- Gotta appreciate the detail of Martin having some shit on the floor. They 100% fight about it at least once a day. (but Chris gets over it dw) (I say as a younger sibling who shared a room for like 17 years with my sister who is now moved out and can't leave clothes all over our floor... I miss sharing a room with her... but the mess? not so much...)

[imfinereallyy]

I wonder if you look both ways (When you cross my mind) pt. 3

a nice long update for ya ♡ part 1 part 2

cw: internalized homophobia and projecting internalized homophobia (from an oc)

🐝･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･✦ʚɞ

June 1996, Chicago

Steve's first steps into his living room are not met with silence and sunshine; in fact, he is met with two surprises.

The first being Eddie Munson still in his apartment.

Steve rubs the tired out of his eyes, squishing his palm into his lids in hopes of shaking out a morning delusion. He is proven unsuccessful..

His second surprise is that Eddie is awake, staring at Steve in high alert, blankets folded neatly (he must have scrounged around for them in the night, not that Steve minds), sitting patiently as if he has been waiting for hours for Steve's arrival.

If the second surprise hadn't happened, Steve might have excused the first. See, Eddie, in all the years he had known him, had been anything but an early riser, usually choosing to sleep the day away. So if he had been asleep still, Steve might have let him being in his apartment slide.

Steve ponders how he doesn't really know Eddie anymore, so he shouldn't actually be surprised.

Eddie clears his throat, "So, how about that talk?"

Steve has to resist shutting his eyes to relish in the sound of Eddie's deep timbre. His voice has grown scratchy over the years—from singing or cigarettes, Steve can't be sure. It feels like coming home, either way, to have his voice brush over him.

Instead, Steve clears his throat back. "Don't have time; maybe try again in another five years." He moves to the kitchen to start making their morning drinks—hot coffee with cream for Robin and an iced dirty chai for Steve.

When Dustin had been working at a cafe back when he was in college, he made Steve try all of their new drinks. Surprisingly his favorite became a dirty chai—something which Robin finds hilarious.

Steve grabs the chipped green mug from the cabinet and begins pouring Robin's coffee. It had already been hot and ready in the pot, which probably meant Eddie had prepped it for him. Steve doesn't comment.

Eddie huffs through his nose, "C'mon Stevi—Steve. It's ten in the morning on a Saturday. You can't tell me you're busy right now."

Steve has to resist slamming Robin's mug down on the counter, already having being put together after the 1994 incident, he doesn't want to face her wrath.

Gently placing it on the counter, Steve turns. "Actually, I have somewhere to be at twelve, not that you need to know that. And don't act like you know what's going on in my life, Munson."

Eddie smiles, a little laugh escapes him. God, it is like a fucking drug after years of being sober that laugh. Steve wants to beg him for another hit, even though he knows it's bad for him.

With the smile never leaving his face, Eddie raises his hands. "Okay, okay. You're right."

"Why are you smiling? This isn't funny." Steve huffs.

Eddie's face softens, "Sorry, just even though you're mad at me. You're talking to me, and shit, sweetheart. I would take that over silence any day. It's nice to hear your voice."

Steve has to force himself to keep his shoulders tense, wanting to sag into Eddie. He's still mad at him, furious even. But some part of him agrees deep down, this is nice.

He can never let Eddie know that.

"Fuck off, Munson. I have shit to do. I'm sure you're too busy anyway."

Eddie shakes his head, hair falling in front of his face. "No, trust me I have nothing else going on. The band is on hiatus. And even if we weren't, trust me when I say this is exactly where I am supposed to be right now."

Steve can't help the snort that comes out of him, "Funny you're asking me to trust you, asshole. That went out the door with your bags five years ago."

Eddie flinches back, "Okay, I deserve that one."

Steve doesn't mention to Eddie how he knows his band has been on hiatus for over a year now. How he's kept up on the band, even after Eddie left. How he is curious why they went on hiatus at all, they have two successful albums, and supposedly were working on their third, when suddenly they all decided it was time for a break.

Peak of their career, and they chose silence. Normally, a horrible career move, but it seems it makes the rock community want them even more.

Steve can understand that partially. When it comes to Eddie, you can't help but want more, even when he disappears without a trace.

"I got to go get ready. Seriously, Munson. I know you think I don't mean it when I say leave. I think you're stuck on the Steve from five years ago, and how the Steve from then wouldn't really mean it. But this is the Steve now. And Steve from now means it when he says, get the fuck out. Go find someone else who could actually use your presence, like Dustin. God knows the kid deserves a phone call."

Eddie opens his mouth to protest, but doesn't get to chance to say his peace, Steve's already on his way back to his bedroom with their drinks in hand.

🐝･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･✦ʚɞ

Steve is running late.

It's not his fault, he has a fucking ghost haunting his living room, and it takes him ten times longer to work around it. Robin tells him to cancel his lunch, but Steve doesn't, even though she's right.

Robin's always right.

Steve can't help but feel a little smug when thinking back to leaving his apartment, though. He looks good, wearing his nicest Levi's and soft white button-up. Steve had made sure to keep the top few buttons undone, showing off his gold necklaces that landed perfectly on his exposed chest hair.

For Drew, of course, not for Eddie.

Still, Steve knows he looks good. So when he leaves his apartment and Eddie doesn't even bother to try to talk to him again because he is just too busy staring at Steve.

Steve makes it to the restaurant only five minutes late. It would have been on time if it had been in his athletic prime.

Resturant, Steve realizes, is a bit of a stretch. It appears to be a cafe--but not one of those cozy ones with crazy colors and a fun name. No, this cafe is incredibly fancy. Everything is so sleek and high up, the name in an Italian word he'll have to asked Robin to translate later.

Steve looks around the cafe in a huff, realizing Drew is nowhere to be found. He is momentarily flooded with relief, knowing he has beaten Drew to the cafe.

Steve finds a table in a corner and waits. His brief relief is quickly swept away into annoyance as he sits there for minutes with no signs of Drew.

It takes another thirty minutes, before Drew is finally at the cafe.

"Sorry, I'm late, baby." He says breath even. Steve knows he was in no rush to be here on time. He doesn't move to kiss Steve, not on the cheek and certainly not on the mouth. Drew isn't one for PDA, or so he says. Instead, he smooths down his dark blue Armani suit and sits across from Steve.

"You know, you could give me a kiss. I haven't seen you in a week." Steve decides to move past his being late; there is no point in arguing. If it had been him, Steve is sure he would never hear the end of it.

"Sweetheart..." Drew whispers and brushes his hand against Steve's knee. Steve's lip twitches; he doesn't like it when Drew calls him that. "You know it isn't safe to do that."

Steve wants to throw Drew's hand off of him, but he doesn't. It's always like this between them, Steve wants more, and Drew pulls back. It's beginning to feel tiresome, this game between them. They have been dating for a year and have made no progress in public. Steve's lucky Robin gets to know, seeing as basically no one else in either of their lives knows about each other. For Steve, everyone knows of Drew but not his name. For Drew, Steve is almost sure no one even knows he's gay.

Steve wants to hit himself for the thought. It's unfair of him to put these expectations on Drew, everyone comes out at their own pace. He would be a hypocrite if he pushed him; it had taken him nineteen years to figure out he was bisexual. Took Eddie leaving for him to come out to anyone other than Robin.

It feels different somehow with Drew, though. Like this isn't him scared to come out, but more like Drew doesn't actually see a future with Steve. It had taken them six months to even label themselves as boyfriends, moving from late-night booty calls to watching a movie together in Steve's living room in the middle of a Tuesday.

Steve rubs his temples instead of smacking Drew's hand away. Steve feels tired of this cycle. He knows this is the best he's going to get when it comes to dating. With women, they often want him to admit that he was experimenting, wanting to shun parts of himself away. That or they are convinced he's gay. Well, he is, but it's more than that, and they don't seem to get it.

With men, it's the opposite problem. Either they need him to admit being bisexual is just something he used to make himself feel better, or they are only looking for a quick hookup.

Hookups are nice, but approaching thirty, Steve wants something real and is perhaps sick of finding out the man he brings home from the bar is married.

He knows this is the best he's going to get.

"Maybe if we met a cafe in my neighborhood, we could be a bit more affectionate. The one down the block has a rainbow flag and everything."

Drew scrunches his nose, "Why do that when we can get nice coffee like this?"

Steve doesn't point out that neither Drew nor himself has ordered coffee. Steve can't afford the coffee here, and Drew was late. "I think that's your way of saying where I live isn't nice."

Drew grabs his hand under the table, "No, babe, I don't want to fight today. I've missed you."

Steve feels bad; he has missed Drew. Despite their ups and downs (and Robin's grumbles), Steve does care for him. "You're right, I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it. Besides, I did want to have lunch for a reason." Drew smiles brightly. Steve can't help but stare for a minute. It's no surprise what hooked Steve the first moment they met at the club. He is a classic kind of handsome. Wavy brown hair cut to look proper, a shiny white smile, piercing blue eyes. Nothing about him is soft, he is full of sharpness that takes you from across the room.

He's the kind of guy Steve's parents would have loved if they were okay with Drew being a guy—if Steve was even talking to them at all.

"Oh yes, you've got me on the edge of my seat." Steve jokes.

Drew gives him a charming smile, "There's my funny guy."

Steve rolls his eyes.

"So I have a big question for you..."

Steve freezes up; oh no. Here it comes. The talk, the let's move into together speech. One he'll have to turn down. No one ever gets it. How he can't live without Robin. Literally and physically.

"....so Greg says there's an opening and I think you'd be a great fit."

Steve shakes himself out of his thoughts, "What?"

Drew levels him with a look. "A job? For you?"

Oh. "I already have a job."

It's Drew's turn to roll his eyes, "C'mon, Steve. A high school guidance counselor? You could do so much more."

"I like my job, Drew. We've been through this. Besides, you barely want to be seen together, and now you want to work together? I have no interest in working at a law firm."

Drew pinches his nose, "Just...just think about it, okay? I want to see more of you in any way I can."

Steve doesn't want to fight. The fight left him a long time ago. "Okay."

He doesn't mean it.

🐝･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･✦ʚɞ

aaah im loving where this is going, also I swear it gets better soon and this has a happy ending!! also thanks for the love and support. This will probably be the last part where I will take tag requests for the series so please ask now, cause its getting too long. But parts will always be updated on the previous posts and my page!!

tag list!:

@stevesbipanic @withacapitalp @emryyyyy09 @brainfugk @blueberrylemontea-fanfic

@slv-333 @thetinymm @connected-dots-st-reblogger @helpimstuckposting @dreamercec

@goodolefashionedloverboi @stripey82 @little2nerdy @anne-bennett-cosplayer @resident-gay-bitch

@ghostquer @sourw0lfs @devondespresso @yesdangerpls

@lingermirth

@adealwithher @antonymeanonyme @stevah-hawcett @samsoble @mugloversonly

@stripey82 @anaibis @mycatsstolemybiscuit @flustratedcas @alfhitchblonde

@s0ft-strawberries @slavicviking @theheadlessphilosopher

@l1lpip @emmabubbles @arepaconchocolate

@thesuninyaface @hallo-spaceb0y @dykelips @bookbinderbitch @valinwonderland

[the-merry-otter]

One of the consequences of sewing a lot recently is that I’ve had ample opportunity to develop creative swear phrases.

This means I am currently calling most misbehaving objects “cheeseless rat bastard”’s

[faunandfloraas]

Smiley Minnie © ⭑참⭑외⭑짜⭑식⭑