#i super weird at showing feelings and terrible with words but im genuinely so so happy and grateful right now

[gigglesoup]

I AM IN TEARS LOOK AT WHAT MY DAD LITERALLY JUST GAVE ME 🥹

Spirited Away is our movie. We used to watch it all the time when i was little and always felt a special connection to it! My dad always related to No-Face and i always related to Chihiro, so their friendship just basically became a representation of our friendship. I always think of him whenever i see anything related to that movie and always will. This was one of the best surprises ever and i love my dad more than words could ever say ❤️

[softer-ua]

in regards to what you pointed out a few posts ago, ngl one of my least favorite fandom things is when they make Kaminari the Har Har Stupid Joking ADHD Bi Playboy Who Is Never Serious Trope. like, he's very smart, 'worst in ___ area of a UA course' is very impressive and I don't remember if it even said that or just that he was studying with some other students, worried about his grades overall, calls himself stupid with implied insecurities about it, and didn't think he was very smart compared to the other people in the course. quirk overuse makes him loopy, incoherent, and think everything's funny. and yeah, he's a bit of a flirt and made a few perverted comments and actions that he clearly didn't think through that well. I'm pretty sure he's not ever stated to be bi in the manga because it was written by a coward, so I think people should think more about why they're associating and pairing together the idea of "hot flirty playboy who if legally able would sleep with everyone he meets" with emphasis or joke in the captions of whatever the content is on him being bi. I don't think this is inherently bad, even put together, but the execution feels kind of :/ and shallow. and I mainly just wish they'd pause to consider if there's any reason (subconscious or intentional) why one of those makes them think about the other, and at the very least lean back to see if they're blatantly making those traits centric around each other and tweak how they're showing them a little. Part of this is also because it's basically his fanon sexuality, but then they stick together "oh he's bi and everyone thinks that" and "he's made flirty or perverted comments and actions in canon at some point" and then mentally exaggerate and have this Canon Image of him as *waves hand at above* and I don't think that's happening consciously in most cases but. again. Cookiecutter Bi Party Playboy Who's Made a Date Offer to Everyone In The Building. not a flirty Person or a Playboy who is bi and flirts with more than one genders

I myself headcanon him as adhd and while the exact sexuality depends on my mood I think of/have him as bi in a lot of my content, but it's the same thing with why non adhd people see how he acts and label "adhd!" Especially about comprehension speed and derpy acting and intelligence and attention span jokes/tropes. Again, not bad in and of itself, but the specific parts of his behavior that make them think he's adhd, or that they start making jokes about or Ha Ha ADHD'ing, or that they think is why we project ADHD on him, (which they aren't necessarily wrong about, but like right in a really disrespectful look at how funny this is oh look squirrel way that's only funny when adhd people are doing it and it isn't all mocking like that) when they see other people calling him adhd, are the wrong ones, I think, and it shows in their characterization of him.

I'm not saying that any of those traits are bad in a character, but as a queer adhd girl with very high annual test scores and Gifted Kid Intelligence but extremely poor grades, focus, and brain damage (admittedly nothing like his, it was a longterm passive thing that mainly just made me have a Lot of Really Bad headaches, and closest thing it did to me was make me sluggish and emotional on bad days and also techincally have the potential kill my language bit if left untreated or the surgery messed up, which it didn't, and it won't be a problem again. but even after explaining that it wasn't cancer or any sort of tumor, and after seeing it do very little at all to affect my behavior outside of irritability and performance, because y'know, constant migraines, gone after the surgery but this was before that, Certain People I Was Vaguely Kind Of Acquaintances With started to treat my like I was a fragile glass thing going to to drop dead and revive myself speaking like a comic relief cartoon crazy person at any moment which was. patronizing.) I've since had surgery for, the way the fandom combines them into stereotypes and portrays them really just rubs me the wrong way- "Flirty Bi(tm) Playboy" "Har Har ADHD Can't Focus Or Get Things After They're Explained To Him, He's Still Confused And An Idiot" "Stupid Person With Brain Damage Who Can't Take Care Of Or Think For Themself And Acts Stupid And Funny For People To Laugh At" which tbh is super ableist even and especially when people irl do fit that description, and also reminds me of the Autistic Person Freaking Out And Being Dramatic sense of humor. And I know it's not helped by canon, because it done for comic relief and to limit his powers, but explored more I think it as a limitation could have been used way more interestingly than canon did and also call me biased but that quirk induced brain frying sounds at least as concerning as Izuku's quirk's backlash.

And it's a shame!! Because he's so much more interesting than that! Instead, the fandom gives me the Cookicutter Funny Bi ADHD Flirt Who's An Idiot and I am sad about it.

tbh it reminds me of what happened to percy jackson, esp with the ADHD Idiot Trope thing. which sucks because apparently it originated in the author making up stories around characters like his adhd and dyslexic kid inspired by Greek myths to tell him after running out of actual myths because it was his special interest and he wanted more. and then the series got kind of all over the place and the fandom processed that the adhd and dyslexic main character who does dumb things sometimes but is very combat smart and great at strategizing and leading gets bad grades and has trouble focusing and has, y'know, adhd, and made him the ADHD Idiot and erased his Gifted Kid girl friend's traits and ADHD and dyslexia into No Nonsense Calls Him an Idiot And Thinks He's Stupid And Has To Tell Him What To Do And Manage His Life For Him and honestly that just kind of sucks and it reminds me of what happened to fandom Kaminari. and now that I think of it people have jirou like that around him a lot too.

im fine with you answering this publicly if you want or have something to add but probably tag as ableism and maybe a biphobia mention content warning for people who don't have the energy to deal with thinking about those kinds of negative things rn because I kind of Went Off About It

I love this! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and experiences ����(and double thank you for tag suggestions)💚

I couldn’t agree more that a lot of fandom has messed up Kami’s character, which is why I’ve kinda been posting more about him cause he’s just stuck in my head.

I think a lot of fandoms have trouble with characters like this, people have a hard time with duality in characters and fast/fun posts are easier to make if you flatten a character down.

The did it to Kami, they did it to Percy, they did it to Ron Weasley, they do it to Thor, the list goes on. If being the Smart One ™️ isn’t your thing and you can be goofy than you get pigeonholed into the idiot trope.

I feel for Kami a lot(probably because I have adhd/brain damage too)

It sucks when you’re smart but it’s not the traditional, measurable kind of smart(even if by national comparison Kami technically is).

I got terrible grades growing up, and I pretty much got the absolute lowest gpa you can get and still graduate. But absolutely no one would have known if I didn’t tell them, because I’m not dumb.

(It’s okay if you are “dumb”, I love me a head empty just vibes friend. You’re 100% valid, stil worthy of joining discussions, and should be listened to and taken seriously. This just isn’t about that tho)

I joke sometimes that I’m clever and witty but not smart, because that’s exactly what it feels like.

I have lots of thoughts and ideas that I think I articulate pretty well, I am excellent at finding the humor in things and expressing it in a way that’s funny to others too, and there is almost zero problems I can’t find a work around. And the people in my life love it, and they love to use it.

But eventually everyone in my life finds out that I’m not smart. They see the way I have to pause to Google how to calculate a tip, that I don’t know the name of all 50 states or even where to find them on a map, or I legitimately just can not spell (if you ever see a post where it looks like I used a weird word choice it’s probably because I tried 4 times and autocorrect+Google couldn’t help me and voice to text wasn’t an option)

No one ever questions my intelligence until they find out about my adhd and/or catch me struggling with it. After the mask comes off it’s like they can’t even hear me anymore, nothing I say could be true or matter because I’m now just the goofy accident prone spacy girl. My family literally calls me Spacy

And ya know what sometimes I just let people think that because it’s easier, it’s easier than explaining that I’m dyslexic and that I didn’t have a single geography/history clas until 10th grade and shocker the capital of Iowa doesn’t come up much by then. And it’s easier for me to laugh off losing my keys again than dwell on the fact that sometimes it feels like I’m losing my marbles.

And I wouldn’t be at all surprised if after this post I get a lot more “fact checkers” and push back on anything else I post.(not talking about people who want to genuinely engage,y’all are always welcome, I’m talking those people who don’t wanna look it up themselves but no longer trust me to know what I’m talking about)

Kami is a sweet brilliant boy. He’s in a nationally high ranking school, he loves the weather channel, he’s careful about his quirk that could easily hurt his friends in combat, he has a very high emotional intelligence level, he wears dorky shirts with electricity puns on them, and he pays attention to his friends and remembers a lot of little things about them.

He wants to be a hero and he takes that seriously, and the series has tried time and time again to tell y’all that smiling and laughter are an important part of that. Kami excels at this part! So what if his history grades don’t rival the top of the class, the top 5 students would struggle hard to do what Kami does.

Iida can’t relax, Momos rather shy, Todo struggles with social cues, Midoriya is canonically not funny, and jfc where to even begin with Katsuki. I’m certain they’ll all grow up to be excellent heros in their own right, but none of them are going to bring the level of joy and camaraderie that Denki can. You can’t test that into someone.

Kami also just notices people differently and has any easy way of joining in with them, he doesn’t struggle approaching Katsuki or Shinso. Sure he doesn’t hit the the nail on the head the same way Deku does but he’s the only one who has the guts and skills to try. Also he’s not that kinda friend, he’s not looking to a save these guys but pal around with them

I think Kami 100% realizes what a special case and tough nut to crack Bakugo is, I don’t think he’s just careless or too dumb realize his life’s at stake or whatever.

I think he’s purposely testing Bakugos boundaries all while trying to not be a threat to Katsukis actual ego and calling Bakugo out when he needs it in a way that not to serious. Kami knows how to be just goofy enough that he’s approachable. He’s also keyed in that the way to Bakugo is through Deku, meanwhile everyone else is stuck believing the opposite.

Kami also realized how important music is to Jiro and saw an opportunity to let her display her skills and combin the two worlds she lives, and he wasn’t afraid to get some back lash from her for it.

Like Deku Kami isn’t afraid to be uncomfortable. You really can’t teach that level of social ease, you can teach the posture and feed people a couple of lines but it’ll never hit the same. Funny approachable people have spent a lifetime learning the craft, usually out of necessity.

It’s actually what gives me the biggest adhd vibes from him, because adhd is (speculated to be) a dopamine deficiency disorder. People with adhd are constantly trying to raise their dopamine levels, and that means looking for praise and reward and nothing makes the human brain light up faster than postative human connections.

Adhd children struggle a lot with connecting with peers and often find making people laugh a fast way into people’s circles and makes it more likely people will overlook being interrupted or spaced out on.

Also adhd people are pretty much forced by their own brain structures to be genuine in all they do, low dopamine levels make it very hard to do things you don’t enjoy because there no promise of dopamine from the activity and you don’t have enough to spare, plus impulsiveness makes it really hard to not show when you do or don’t enjoy something.

I agree that Kami is also painted as overly perverted at times, he’s a little flirty but in a fun casual way but it’s not the foundation of his personality and it’s really mellowed out over the course of the series.

And while I subscribe to the bi hc from his interactions with Jiro and Shinso, we should all be very mindful that we don’t lump these characteristics together. The are separate facets of his personality that are not dependent on each other in anyway.

Kami deserves all the respect and love, I can’t wait to see our electric king again 🖤⚡️🖤

[deliberatelyvague]

Spotlight (Asmodeus x fem!reader)

Started: April 5, 2020 at 7:42pm

Ended: April 5, 2020 at 8:50pm

Word Count: 2,030

Shipping: [Asmodeus x fem!reader]

Trigger Warning: cutting, eating disorder, (notes of) depression

Author’s Note: Uhh so here’s another one. I enjoy writing stories, so please, continue requesting!

Prompt/Request: OK SO IDK WHICH ONE I WANT TO REQUEST SO IM DOING BOTH. Can I request a mc x asmo scenario where mc is a super duper popular idol but it’s later revealed that in order to keep her beauty she develop an eating disorder and started to develop depression resulting in cutting her self?? Sorry for the weird ask!!

—————

You had always heard the saying ‘beauty is pain’. You didn’t realize how much pain it was, however, until you got down to the Devildom. Of course, you weren’t totally off Scott-free, your fans still expected some content, and you were in no place to deny them that.

Now, you loved the majority of your fans. They always backed you up, defended you and the link, but there was just somethings they couldn’t defend you from. Including yourself, unfortunately.

Getting famous started moderately fine, you went viral because of your singing videos, and you guess some modeling businesses enjoyed your looks and attitude enough that they asked if you could do some shoots. From then on, it was a whirlwind of sessions, meet and greets, starving yourself and self harming.

That last part was relatively new, and it was caused by some hate that you had received. Well, hate was to put it in modern terms. A tabloid had started rumors that you had gained weight, which wasn’t wrong (you were still growing and maturing, your body weight is going to fluctuate), but they stretched it beyond what it was and paired it with some terrible pictures taken with your guard down. It all mixed to create a terrible atmosphere, especially when other tabloids started to gossip about your weight as well.

Eventually it seemed that your weight was the only thing important. So, you started to cut down on food. You started to take walks and workout moderately regularly, and the results were almost instantaneous. You dropped a few pounds a week, your figure slimmed down and you had never felt better. But then, the opposite effect happened with the tabloids, talking about how much weight you had lost, but this time they were praising you. You loved that feeling, it’s why you continued singing and modeling anyway.

People called you beautiful and you thrived off the attention, which is probably why when you went to the Devildom you and Asmodeus hit it off so quickly.

You two were best friends within the first week you were there- and since he had a tendency of going partying after school and hanging out with other friends of his on some days, he never noticed how little you truly ate.

None of the other brother’s noticed, or you figured they didn’t.

But then something happened, you stopped losing weight as quickly as you had been. This sends you into spirals of anxiety, making you cut back more and more, exercise more. But it didn’t work. In fact, one week when you had weighed in, you had gained weight.

As you stared at that number flashing at you, the number that was only a pound above where it had been last week, you started sobbing.

Thoughts piled up in your mind about how you weren’t good enough anymore, about how your fans will leave you, about how Asmodeus would leave you. His friendship meant the world to you, and you would be lying if you told yourself that a friendship was all that you wanted from him.

But he was out partying with demons that were better than you, no doubt, ones that were skinnier, more confident, and yards better than you in everything.

In the back of your mind, you remembered the hater’s comments on some of your most popular songs, telling you about doing things to your body. You remember the tabloids gossiping about self-harm scars on popular actresses' bodies, and you thought about why they would do that. It’s said to be a pleasure source, something that makes the person doing it feel better.

You would do anything to feel actually, genuinely happy, for once, so before you even thought about it you had popped a blade out of the razor in the bathroom and pressed it to your hip. You almost never showed off your stomach, so it wouldn’t be that big of a deal.

You flinched away from the wound almost immediately, the pain coming in tiny spikes. But then, eventually, there was a bit of pleasure coming from it, watching little dots of blood pop up and drip down your hip and fall onto the ground. You cut yourself again, then once more.

You swallowed, breaking out of the trance the red lines had put you in before you realized that you needed to finish your homework. You cleaned up your cuts, sliding on a pair of loose-fitting joggers and a shirt you had taken from Asmodeus and padded over to your desk, sitting in the sodden chair, trying not to bother the cuts more than the pants would already. You quickly finished the homework, well as quickly as you could when every few minutes or so you would move slightly and the cuts would be agitated, and for a few quick moments you considered taking off your pants, but you didn’t know when Asmodeus would make his way to your room and come in without knocking like he usually did.

Though eventually you did change into some sleeping shorts, ones that almost fell off of your body, and that were practically bootie shorts.

“Doll, I’m coming in,” you heard Asmodeus’ voice through the door before he opened it. You were laying on your back on your bed, your head hanging off and your DDD in your hand.

“Asmo!” You called gleefully, his face immediately lightening your mood substantially. “How was the party?”

“It wasn’t as good as the one the other week, you remember that one, right doll? The one I forced you to come to.”

“Oh, yeah that one. I love that the first party you made me go to was also a rave. Go big or go home, right?”

“Of course! Now, Doll, what are we doing tonight? We could watch a movie and eat some unhealthy snacks?”

“Uh, we can watch movies, but I don’t really want to eat anything,” you told him, flipping around on your bed and sitting on your legs. He tilted his head and a frown formed between his two perfectly sculpted eyebrows.

“Oh? But Lucifer told me you didn’t eat tonight, you must be hungry?”

“No, I’m not really,” you assured him, but your stomach decided to betray you in that exact moment almost as if it was saying ‘don’t lie to him I am hungry’.

He looked from your stomach to your face with an unamused look on his face.

“[Y/N], he also told me that he’s never seen you eat, that you don’t eat dinner here at all. You know you don’t have to lie to me, right?”

The honesty in his voice and the look in his eyes almost broke you.

“I know,” he looked concerned, but didn’t push you. You knew you would tell him about your disorder when you were ready, hopefully if he had any idea about your disorder, he knew that too.

The two of you decided to do an at-home spa day, and he took you to his room. The two of you did face masks, hair masks, mani-pedis, and other things like that.

You had chosen each other’s nail colors, and you had picked an orange color to match his eyes, and he picked pink, using a holographic color on your ring figures. You liked that enough you did that on his ring figured too so you both would be matching.

While you waited for your nails to dry and picked out toenail polish, he asked you about any crushes.

“Oh, no, Asmo, I don’t really have my eyes on anyone,” you lied as you looked through the shades of blue he had. His eyes immediately lit up.

“Yes! Yes you do, I knew it! Who is it?” He said excitedly, and you shook your head.

“I knew you wouldn’t believe that. I’m not going to tell you because it’ll never happen, trust me.”

“Doll, how could you say that? I’m sure a lot of people would love to date you, to be able to call you theirs!” You shook your head, scoffing at him.

“Not this guy. I’m pretty sure he had his eyes on someone else, anyway.”

“Is it Lucifer? It does seem like he has his eyes on Diavolo, but I don’t know about that one, Doll. You still might have a chance.”

“No! It’s not Lucifer, I don’t have that big of daddy issues.”

“Who is it? Please, tell me,” he begged, and for the first time you actually looked at him. His eyes showed almost.. sadness. He seemed sad to be thinking about you with someone else.

You just shook your head.

“Asmo,” you let out, leaning back and looking at him. “It’ll ruin this.” He frowned.

“[Y/N], what do you mean?”

“Asmo,” here it comes, you just decided to let it out. “I like you. I really, really like you. But I understand if it weirds you out, if I’m not your type, I-”

You were interrupted when Asmo held the back of your head and brought your lips to his. You melted into his, and he put his hands on your hips and pulled you onto his lap. You let out a yelp when he pulled on you a little too hard, your cuts opening.

“Doll, what’s wrong?” He asks, before looking down at where his hands were, one of his hands having a little spot of blood on them and the shorts being stained with a little amount of blood. “[Y/N], what’s this?” You let his lift your shirt and pull down your shorts slightly, and he let out a small gasp, his face dropping as he took in your figure, one significantly smaller than it had been when you first came, and the multiple cuts you had on you.

“I, it’s just stress. The tabloids, the comment sections of almost anything when I post pictures, it’s all just a lot.”

“Doll, you could have come to me. Here, let’s fix you up a little bit,” he soothed, picking you up and making you wrap your legs around him, carrying you to his bathroom and dressing your wounds. You didn’t say anything to him. “When’s the last time you ate or drank anything?”

“I drank some water earlier today,” you tell him, and he smiles slightly and strokes your hair. “Good job on that, Doll. But we need to get some food in your stomach, okay?”

Your heartbeat sped up, and you shook your head, tears coming.

“No, Asmo, I can’t eat. Please, don’t make me.”

“I’m not asking you to eat much, please, I can’t have my girl dying on me. What about a piece of fruit and some more water?”

You looked at the floor for a few seconds.

“Can we watch something while I eat, and cuddle, please? It’ll help me take my mind off of it, I think.” He nods, and you both walk to the kitchen after fixing your clothes.

Grabbing your food and water you make your way to your room and turn on [TV show or movie] as Asmo sat on the floor, pulling you into his lap, his chest pressed against your back. He kissed underneath your ear.

Once you had finished the food, which took a bit, but it’s still down for now, he praised you.

“Good girl, Doll. Now finish the water and he can cuddle more.”

You finish the water and turn to him.

“Thank you, Asmo. For helping me.”

“Of course, Doll. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

————

This was written by me in no way trying to romanticize mental illnesses. I try to write what I feel would help me in the moment. I completely understand that mental illnesses don’t just ‘disappear’ when you’ve figured out that someone loves you or someone helps you once- that’s why I don’t write what happens after in most cases. If you are struggling, please reach out to anyone you trust, or call a hotline.

[progamerton]

Thoughts on my portrayal

I've been meaning to get more active on this account as soon as I can scrounge up enough will to do so. But I wanted to explain my thought process as to why certain aspects are the way they are for the... 10(?) people who actually care lmao.

My Proton is heavily inspired by his appearance in the HGSS manga. Tbh I'm not a huge fan of PokeSpe, but when you've got such slim pickings with the in-game canon material, anything that can be taken into consideration should at least be at least looked at. I found the idea that he was Team Rocket's stoic, quiet, Computer Tech Guy a fresh take. As a result, I combined them -- Proton IS indeed their stoic, quiet Computer Tech / Social Media Guy, but he's ALSO a ruthless sadistic asshole, who's only quiet because he can't stand talking to other people.

When you look at his portrayal as a combination between the games and PokeSpe, things start to make a lot more sense. He is an incredibly capable, computer-savvy internet nerd, but he makes himself so unavailable (emotionally or otherwise) that he's got a weird amount of mystique about him. Girls in the organization tend to simp for him because, as sparse as he makes himself, he's still the most visible Executive in the organization, and he's got a pretty face to boot. They will usually try to prove how much they adore him by savagely targeting anything he deems stupid like the most toxic Stans in the history of anything. But ultimately, all of that is for naught. Proton is just too fucking misanthropic to ever give a damn about other people, and in truth, he probably hates his Stans the most out of anybody. But he accepts the chaos they wreak as the only "good" thing to come out of the situation.

Now about his accent: There's a fair amount of debate about whether or not Sinnoh should be treated as just another part of Japan, as was intended, or Russia. Tbh I go with the former hc more than the latter, but I decided to give Proton a Slavic-ish accent anyways because 1) It's kinda funny 2) Chicks dig guys with foreign accents 3) Proton can be obtuse on purpose and no one could be able to tell.

He does have genuine difficulties with speaking Japanese, but is generally much better at writing it. This is mostly because he talks a lot faster than he writes. When you're documenting a report or something, you can go slow or proofread it as you see fit. Talking doesn't work like that. He's personally the type of guy who would hate having a conversation with someone where they pause every 5 seconds and spend an eternity searching for the right word, so he made the conscious decision to sacrifice accuracy for speed with the assumption of, "Meh, they'll figure out what I really meant." (This also comes into play during internet / IM conversations where speed is more important.) Just call his ability Hustle I guess, lmao.

Despite his deep, pathological hatred for just about Everything in the world, Proton is super devoted to Team Rocket as a whole, and instills the same measure of respect into those serving directly under him. That's because he felt like Team Rocket was the first organization that really GOT him and appreciated him for who he was (a terrible, sadistic douchebag) instead of trying to change him for the "better". In fact, they promoted him for it. That's special to him, so his feelings in general about returning to a more "civilized" career fills him with dread. He'd quite literally fight for Team Rocket to the death if need-be.

Team Rocket also gave him his first, most significant friend in Petrel, who is the cool headed one in their red/blue dynamic. Despite that, you'll hear him constantly insult Petrel and downplay his importance, often calling him degrading stuff like "Rattata Man". In a very strange way, that could be considered a compliment from him, since he calls basically everyone (including himself) "maggots". Being a Rattata among maggots doesn't sound too bad, does it? In addition, he calls Giovanni p much exclusively "Boss". That's the most respect he'll ever show anyone tbh.

So it should be no surprise why Proton tends to hate Silver so much -- he respects Giovanni more than anyone in the world, and here comes this whiny little brat, mooching off of him. He knows now that Silver is SUPPOSED to be Giovanni's kid, but tbh he thinks it's a lie and considers Giovanni dumb as fuck for not seeing it for himself. In Proton's eyes, Giovanni and Silver look NOTHING alike. So don't expect him to show you any high regards if you're a Silver mun. He'll disrespect you in front of anyone -- including your own damn father, if need-be. No fear.

That's about all I have in terms of HCs for this guy. Please feel free to shoot me any questions about him if you have them.

[spxllcxstxr]

🚢 — hi love, i was wondering if i could get ship for hp in the marauders era? i’m terribly sorry if these are closed, feel free to ignore this!!

———

my pronouns are she/her or she/they... i’m still debating which set i like better haha and i would like a male ship pretty please <3

i am a ravenclaw, with some slytherin & hufflepuff traits here and there :) and i am an ambivert!

i am, much to my dismay, only 5’ 1.5” (to all my tall peeps out there... saying that i’m jealous of you would be an understatement.) i am quite curvy (and omg kinda insecure abt that ✌️) i have long, silky, and straight black hair that reaches the base of my back, and i love eyeliner so so much like i’m not even joking (on good days at least)

people often tell me that at first glance i seem bubbly, happy, and kinda quiet or shy hehe, and my friends have said that once you get to know me i am genuine, creative, funny, empathetic, a good listener, charming, painfully stubborn, righteous, and little loud, and very very dramatic jhjfk

i am pretty shy in new environments but with my friends i am loud asf, like seriously i need to shut up 😐 i am very very loyal and i value any bit of trust someone has in me.

my love language is definitely physical touch. i am one of those affectionate yet somehow touch-starved people haha! i find that sometimes words (or saying them atleast) can be a little bit hard and awkward for me, so i like to project my feelings and love for people through physical contact and all the affection they could ever dream of <3 and omg that thing where someone leans into your touch? marvelous. absolutley marvelous.

i like it when people play with my hair or touch me in some way, although if they’re a stranger then i will pull out my ninja moves and roundhouse kick them if they touch me 🤺 i also really like to play with other peoples hair!! (my love for long-ish hair is showing hnng-)

i could ramble about the sky, the stars, and just astronomy in general for days and never get tired of it, bc wow have you ever seen the night sky? i get so excited when i recognize a star or a constellation or a planet and agh i just love astronomy!! star gazing is one of my most favorite things to do <3 (and i have a these necklaces that i love so so much okay, one has the constellation of my zodiac, and the other has my fave constellation!!!)

i am a very very sassy, sarcastic, and witty person! i live for playful banter and teasing, i guess you could say that’s my way of flirting after me and the person i’m interested in have a friendship aha! i have comebacks for days and will not hesitate to roast someone into oblivion (although if it’s that harsh then i’ll immediately apologize bc i pinky promise i'm not mean okay)

i love to draw! i have a sketchbook and it’s strictly for my eyes only, UNLESS i deem someone special enough to view my sacred scribbles <33 i love to sketch people and things, and this might sound creepy but i have this urge to draw the people i’m close to sometimes (i did this a few times and omg i felt so embarrassed so i hid the drawings rip)

singing and music is also a big interest of mine! i’m not the best with instruments (i took viola for a while and i can still play but im no prodigy) but i am pretty good with my voice. people have told me that i have an ~aesthetic~ singing voice and that i have good vocal range hehe! sometimes i randomly break out into song around people i’m close to and they always either laugh or scoff and call me a ‘drama queen’ (i live for theatrics if you can’t tell, anyone who can match my dramatic flare is just yes <33)

oh and i am always down to do dangerous, stupid, and fun shit with my friends AHA 😙‼️i like to focus on the positive side of things, but i do have my icky days where i feel super insecure, sad, and useless ahaha ��✌️ my friends always make me feel better tho <3

———

whoops omg this was so long, i am SO SORRY

(pls accept my apology bc i feel kinda bad now 🥲)

congratulations on 500!! you deserve each and every follower you have and i am just so so happy for you!

mwah mwah tysm and make sure you’re drinking water and taking care of yourself, love!! 💞💞

Ahhh thank you so so much!! ❤️❤️ don’t worry, these aren’t closed until the 26th I just haven’t been linking to it because I’m lazy 😳 anywayyyyy ship under the cut! ❤️

I ship you with: James Potter!

The ravenclaw tower is cool and all, but you totally going to be hanging out in the Gryffindor common room a lot

James will sneak into your common room though

I promise

You’re short. Just thought I should say that lmao

James thinks it’s so cute though

I’m going to say that James is going to give you piggyback rides throughout the castle

Like even to class

Loves that he has to reach things for you

“C’mon short stuff!”

“Don’t call me short stuff, James!”

“Then stop being short!”

James absolutely loves your body

Like is in love with it

And he will shower you in love all the time

And of you ever get insecure he is right by your side

No matter what

He loves you so much

HE LOVES YOUR HAIR

James will want to brush it and braid it and do weird shit with it

Please put eyeliner on James

He’d look so hot

Janes is a bubbly guy

So I just feel like your personalities match so well

Like you guys are the couple that is always laughing at something

Or making faces at each other from across the room

James doesn’t want you to shut up ever

Because he never shuts up

He loves your voice

Even if you’re just reading some boring book out loud

Falls in love with you every day

JAMES LOVES TOUCH

I swear he will always be touching you

Hand holding

Leaning on you

Anything

Always always touching

Does that thing where he kisses the back of your hand

Like I mentioned before

James loves hearing you talk

So please ramble about space

All the time

Takes you to stargaze

All the time

(You’re going to do his astronomy homework too)

Playful banter is a must

James is cocky and playful and just

Overall sarcastic and sassy

So you guys are going to have loads of fun

Loses his shit when you roast someone

Claps for no reason

“That’s my girl!”

YOU DRAW??? That’s so cool

James always wan s to see what you’re drawing

But respects your boundaries and your privacy

Will hang your drawings up in his room if you give anything to him

Loves them so much

Singing!!!!!

You guys will sing a lot

He will request the Beatles a lot

But like you can just burst out into song randomly and he goes wild

He’s your number one fan don’t worry

You are definitely part of the Marauders

So

Dangerous and crazy shit is a must

James will always be a shoulder for you to cry on

and like

He just loves you so much

Nd always wants to be around you

He hates seeing you insecure or doubt yourself

“You’re my girl. And I love my girl.”

I hope you like your ship! And drink some water!! ❤️

[mousehole5000]

tgcf chapters 107 - 120 this is one where i give some Opinions. i do overall like hualian a lot but i have some quibbles

wait why am i still taking screenshots? i can copy/paste again afskldfjasad

It really was hard to tell whether people would feel happy after watching such performances. However, in truth, slaughter and the sight of blood did create excitement in people. Whether or not there was fear, after the initial shock was over, a rush of adrenaline would be produced in the heart- me watching horror movies

“Shi Qingxuan said. “Then, Your Highness, Crimson Rain Sought Flower! I order you to—to immediately strip each other’s clothing!” - djslkadjlsd WHY DID HE SPECIFICALLY SAY THEY HAD TO STRIP EACH OTHER THISALSKDJ is this a normal thing is it a wingman attempt what is happening

“I’ll tell you what it is,” he said softly. “To watch with your own eyes your beloved be trampled and ridiculed, yet be unable to do anything. That’s the worst suffering in the world.” ... “Ming Yi asked, “What’s the biggest regret of your life?”- when truth or dare gets a bit too real

On the side, Hua Cheng was still only observing, and was already bored to the point where he’d changed back into his red robes. Then he changed to black robes again. Then to white robes. Almost every time Xie Lian looked back, he would be donning a different appearance, and with every new look there were different hairstyles, and different accessories, and different boots, and so on; sometimes playful, sometimes elegant, sometimes deadly, sometimes glamourous. Xie Lian was growing dizzy from all the colours and kept looking back, unable to look away. - THIS ISNT THE TIME HUA CHENG. YOURE PRIMPING. THE WINDMASTER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED AND YOURE PRIMPING

obsessed with xie lian not being able to figure out to use the windmaster’s fan and just. using it to SMACK

also windmaster??? whats going on??? :( i know some things from spoilers like who is not to be trusted but i really have no clue whats happening rn

anyways back to puqi shrine lets check on those kids also can we PLEASE get some funds for this restoration smh. hua cheng and xie lian doing mundane hard labor together to fulfill prayers.... :pleading:

jailbreak in the heavens 2: dig a tunnel

Sure enough, the moment Ming Yi put pressure on his shovel, a hole opened up before them. With the shovel raised, he burrowed crazily ahead while Shi Qingxuan, in the middle, cheered him on crazily. As the only non-crazy person, Xie Lian brought up the rear. That treasured shovel of the Earth Master was indeed magical, and with only a few strokes, a new tunnel of over ten meters was dug. - anybody remember mulch diggums from the artemis fowl series? this is much more dignified than that but i think this is only the second time ive read a character just starting digging a tunnel as a plot point

okay so much is going on i wish i hadnt spoiled who certain characters actually are for myself but i have no one to blame but me for a) not blacklisting spoilers at all and b) just having a little freefall through the tags. oh well. anyway heavenly college admissions scandal except way worse. the corruption extends to the heavens and the windmaster is having a very bad day

i guess we’re having a high seas adventure now?

im gonna keep it real im getting tired of how often we get told how handsome hua cheng is. i know its all xie lian’s pov and while im not terribly familiar with it i know what genre we’re working with and im assuming thats pretty typical. its something i dont much care for in general and idk maybe it sounds better in the original but ngl its starting to make me roll my eyes. love you goth king but god okay we get it.

i guess what i will say about hualian so far is that overall i like them and i like how they interact in general they have a lot of nice moments and they just genuinely seem to like each other which is really nice to see EXCEPT for when it actually comes to things that could be romantic or sexual which is a shame bc i dont think it has to be like this. again disclaimer that im only reading a translation and dont know everything might not have all the knowledge necessary to accurately criticize etc etc and im assuming a lot of this is expected from the genre (disclaimer to this disclaimer that i cant say that for sure its just based on things ive picked up about the bl genre over the years) but idk like xie lian was so distressed after their underwater kiss scene. it was kind of uncomfortable to read and maybe im being unfair i know his cultivation is based around abstinence or whatever but idk i dont care for it. and that scene alone doesnt have to be a bad thing like idk i guess its his first kiss ever (?) and it would make sense if he feels weird about it but i just have my doubts thats going to be addressed or resolved in a satisfying way. also im like. dude everyone is like centuries old. xie lian’s been on earth for 800 years. has he really never met or heard of a gay person during all this time? maybe he hasnt idk what he got up to yet maybe that’s actually a thing. also same thing with the reactions from the immortals to xie lian in a dress and characters like the windmaster like again you’re all centuries old and its not uncommon to be able to just completely change gender presentation. why are you all weird about a man wearing a woman’s dress? i just feel like that shouldnt be a big deal to these characters idk

also again not going to lie part of this that im not really a big fan of reading romance in general. yes i am reading this book. yes i do read and write a lot of fanfic that includes or centers romance. im multifaceted. but really what im talking about is the like physical side of it and descriptions im extremely picky about it. ill give an example. early on in the torture pit (or whatever it was called i cant remember lol) when xie lian kind of accidentally felt up hua cheng in the dark when he was being carried. i dont think thats a bad thing to have happen between the two romantic leads i think thats fine and good to include that early but i just did not enjoy reading it when it happened idk maybe it was the wording and i do think that moments like these work better in a visual medium. ive definitely read het romance that reads like this and i wasnt a fan of that either lol same with fanfic i get tired when writers go on and on about how hot one characters finds another character. this isnt a huge criticism of it like i said im picky but again like with the way that hua cheng is described it just makes me roll my eyes sorry kings

okay back to the reading. this whole saving the fishermen thing feels like a big set up for something narrative-wise. hua cheng specifically insisted on coming and i know one of the characters involved ends up dying im wondering if thats now it would be a good time tbh if things get just a bit too unfortunate during this heavenly calamity... and the brothers are notably not having a harmonious time... also tho it feels very likely we’ll just have another Hualian Moment (tm)

In such a situation, Pei Ming still acted the same. In the evening, when they rescued a few fishermen girls, so scared their eyes were blurry from tears, he held them in his embrace and soothed them with a gentle voice; a true show of honeyed romance, affectionate and charming. - pei ming please get pickled again.

also its funny that hua cheng is just kinda hanging out and everyone else just has to deal with it

Looking down from above, the entire area was painted in a terrifying black. It was easy to see the collision between the two different-coloured currents. Their fierce battle was what formed this enormous whirlpool. As the eye swallowed the ship whole, the two currents of water separated. However, the battle was far from over. Like two venomous vipers, they continued to snap at each other. Each collision was followed by a mountain of angry waves. - this pretty dope ngl. also love our wind and earth masters just chilling on a shovel i dig it. hehe

Yet, other than discovering Hua Cheng had a fine body, there were no other finds. Xie Lian was at his wit’s end and started to worry. - okay see this one’s funny im just also irritated bc im like WE KNOW!!! WE GET IT HE’S HOT AND XIE LIAN THINKS HE’S HOT OKAY GOT IT

okay kiss #2 again its not the kisses themselves its xie lian’s reaction it just bothers me idk im not saying i need him to be super into it and completely unconflicted about it rn but he’s just so freaked out about it and idk i just dont really like it just feels weird i dont care for that aspect of it. also dude hua cheng is a ghost and he did this exact same thing for you before just chill. i wish instead of xie lian literally running away while screaming that hes sorry he was just like “oh haha youre fine thats cool im gonna go look around the woods i dont feel weird about this at all haha” like idk its kind of funny but when its literally our two romantic leads i just feel like its confusing like it kind of makes me feel like they shouldnt be together if one of them freaks out this much again considering the fact that they are both CENTURIES old. i know i know xie lian is an 800 year old virgin but. he hasn’t been like this about anything else so yeah idk like it still could have been awkward and funny i just dont think it needed to be so :/ that being said it was funny that xie lian was then internally like “oh i did it wrong? perhaps i should ask him for more.. instructions....” if that actually happens i might like it bc it would complete this little watery theme

Before he finished, he immediately remembered. Coffin wood. There were trees here everywhere; and a deceased? There was one right before his eyes. Sure enough, Hua Cheng smiled. “Won’t it be fine once I lie inside? - love that hua cheng just sat on the fact that he can turn anything into a coffin. that would have been really useful information earlier but no he just waited until everyone but xie lian was gone afjaklsdjf

also i do think that oblivious xie lian thinking “wow whoever it is that hua cheng fancies is an idiot for not liking him back theyre totally taking him for granted :/” is kind of funny and sweet. actually the whole conversation they have at the campfire is good and im bookmarking it to think about later

“...You on top and me on the bottom,” Xie Lian replied. “Isn’t top and bottom the same?” Hua Cheng asked. - okay im sorry but. mood whenever theres discourse about top/bottom dynamics for a ship im just like jesus christ i dont care. tbh i rarely read fanfiction if its just sexual and ngl if i see a fic specifically tag characters as top or bottom i wont read it lmfao. especially when people have really strong opinions about this stuff when theres nothing canonical to back it up like headcanon all you want but whenever i see people argue about it im just like no offense but go work out your own sexual issues and dynamics instead of arguing with strangers on the internet about who’s a top and who’s a bottom. sorry to be mean but just thats how i feel lol

this was mostly a ramble with a few excerpts but im getting sleepy im going to TRY to take a break from this for like a day but we’ll see how that goes i do very much want to know what happens. anyway if you read this whole thing hiiiiii sorry for subjecting you to my opinions on top/bottom discourse

[ziracona]

Please don't take this as offensive (im sorry if i come across that way, i hope not) but i really wouldn't take someone like Yourself to be a Fates fan. Fates and Fgo just tends to be filled with a lot of uh, Problems? For a lack of better words? The fandom and the content is just really REALLY weird to me. There's also like a ton of shows(games?), so im starting to wonder if I just started off on the wrong foot? Am i missing something?

​I am a being of many interests. Lol, you’re good though. I very much get it.

Fate is...a weird mix? I don’t even think I can call myself a proper ‘Fate fan,’ because while I collect secondhand info like a lint roller takes lint, I’ve barely experienced any of even just the shows (which is an intentional choice). You are actually correct both times; it is both games and shows. And more. It started as a multi-path lite novel, which got adapted into anime, and more. There’s the big shows, which mostly connect to the original novel, plus a bunch of stories set in that expanded universe, in show game and more formats. I have no idea what you started on, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was bad, because Fate tends to be a roulette wheel. Basically, the short version is that the reason for this is Fate swaps out like their whole creative team for every show and game and thing, and every fuckin /arc/ of Fate Go, so the quality will vary from “Huh. That was...something” to “Oh my god that was a waste of so many hours wtf that was /god/awful” to “oh worm??! This is kinda fun” to “i-is this a spiritual experience?”

So they’re all kind of connected but also not really? I can’t think of a good thing to liken it to, because it’s a weird way to do something, but even many stories with the exact same characters are written or adapted by completely different teams, so they’re kind of all connected in name more than anything else? It’s very much a consume and take or leave only specifically what you want kind of thing.

I can’t speak to the fandom because I’m not really...in it? And have only ever gone into the tags for gifs. But I would not be surprised if a lot of the most vocal ones are terrifying. It seems like that’s often the case in many fandoms regrettably.

Tbh I can’t honestly speak to most Fate media. The only game I have played is Go, the little gatcha phone game. Honestly, anybody who played/plays Fate Go too and wants to roast me for it has free rein. It’s ridiculous, and goofy, and often stupid, sometimes straight up terrible, but also sometimes kind of fantastic. Florence Nightengale tried to chop off all my limbs when she met me and beat a president up to ‘fix’ him. King David pulled the sickest tactical finess in the history of warfare. The game made fun of everyone who takes shipping too seriously and roasted them all in an event which gave me great screenshots for future use:

It’s a super mixed bag, which is sometimes actually fantastic, and sometimes so bad that I am like “I...want to commit assault against whoever just did the art alone.” But I just kind of skip the downticks and stick around for arcs that get the good writers. It’s goofy, but some of it has made me genuinely happy, and that’s extremely valuable to me right now. (On a good arc) It’s like, the right mesh of funny and serious and goofy and low key but clever for me to get really into but in like consistently a light and non-stressful way.

The only anime I have actually watched is Unlimited Blade Works, which I thought was phenomenal and it wrecked me as a human being. It’s also very beautiful and has some of the best animated fight scenes in anything I have seen ever, and I would wholeheartedly recommend it. I can’t speak to any of the others. And I don’t want to watch any of the other OG paths and no one can make me. But UBW lives rent free in my soul. I mean:

If you were a normal human being, you will probably watch this and go “Some of that was confusing, but it was pretty neat. 8/10 stars.” If you wanted to sincerely be a superhero as a kid or god forbid are like me and still haven’t entirely given up on that dream deep down, it’ll be a 13/10 but it will also crush your soul and leave it in little glass shards. Worth it tho. 13/10, would rewatch a 5th time.

Anyway there was your long and unnecessary breakdown of me and fate. The TLDR is I’m actually just the “I have approximate knowledge of many things” guy from Adventure Time and know very little comprehensively. Go is stupid, but the times it’s great are worth the times I want to die to me personally, as a phone game. And UBW is high art and it hurt me in a way that was worthwhile because it made me feel truly heard even if in a painful way by at least one other person. And also it’s just kind of a killer of a story.

[forme-withme]

ive seen a few others post their thoughts on the black so i figured I’d do the same! serious spoilers under the read more!

I’ll start with the designs:

I’ll admit the transition to cgi was something that I was really dreading while watching the trailers, but once I got into the show it really faded into the background on the humans and looked really cool with the kaiju. 

As for the designs themselves, the people were largely Basic Anime Protagonists and there’s not much to talk about there, but the kaiju! oh, the kaiju. Copperhead’s colors and the detailing with black made it really stand out. And then there’s the dogs! puppies! super super fun n funky and felt very much an organic transition from the giant kaiju and seems to be a subtle nod to the ideas posed at the end (which i will get into later) and then that leaves Apex and Boy’s designs! Apex is a pretty straight forward Jaeger design that has only slightly been Kaijufied but I think the front acting as literal eyes was cool as well as the way they animated the attempted driftings. Boy was really interesting because they were so sure to make him Different and his color schemes as well as the size-difference was a really interesting way to do that. Having the literal dark vs light fight at the end was fun and appropriately on the nose for a pacific rim spinoff. 

And now for the plot and characters:

The plot, while fun and with no huge errors or egregious mishandlings of the franchise, was mostly predictable and typical of anything in this vein. There were genuinely quite a few scenes that had me either feeling for the characters or genuinely shocked (joel :( u deserved better. also that was cheap shock-value but at least it made sense within the story and what shane is capable of) 

My first real issue (besides the main conceit of abandoning australia and why the kaiju don’t go towards  comes almost immediately with the pacing. Why would we care about all of these people in this encampment when we have spent all of 5 minutes with them. Their voice actors aren’t even in the credits because they have so few lines. We are told they were friends but never really shown it. After they leave, the pacing gets truly terrible. The boy is introduced and clearly breaks out on his own, which no one notices. For some reason. And eats a butterfly which good for him but I’m not really sure why they did that if they wanted any kind of reveal that he was part Kaiju. Then they’re taken to the camp and the show spend just as long on a deal for some eggs as they did in that first place (not to mention hayley immediately accidentally causes more deaths which is. an interesting thing to keep up) and we stay at this camp for entirely too long,(seriously? 3 out of 7 episodes?) considering shane and mei’s interactions show clearly there is something More and something Wrong between them. It was extremely easy to note for note see what would happen in the fight after they leave: ooh shocker the boy is fine. i did think it was a good enough way to portray that to the characters, though, since they had their back turned every time he ate something a human shouldn’t or slapped it out of his hand or fully refused to interpret the things he was staring wistfully at even though they found him in a literal tube of the stuff we see them preserving kaiju parts (including Alice) in the movies. After leaving the camp, because they spent so long there they have to race to the finish line. They establish ghost drift side effects (which. was ghost drifting a canon word before this or did they take the word we used to explain side effects and use it for literal ghosts. also what year is this set it please i dont understand-) and also bring in Loa malfunctioning (not review but. im thinking shes a little more advanced than she’s supposed to be when taking into account her snide remarks and “unintentional sarcasm” as joel puts it. like once agian: would be highly predictable given everything but shes simply the funniest one around) and then after this they meet back up w mei and she has one of the better cut scenes with her in the restaurant remembering trauma cut with the dance scene which while out of place was v cute and honestly yeah. sometimes you remember a trauma and go ok tabling that. and then get up and dance w ur friends and then the Reveals happen (which. why would they know for sure that it’s the precursors and not the ppdc’s work still? Taylor seemed pretty confident that it wasn’t their military even though it was in their labs and the whole initial idea behind the jaegers was to ‘make monsters of our own’) and the fight happens and then it’s over! And also the sisters that are mentioned Once are there talking abt the Kaiju Messiah which while an interesting tie in to the kaiju cult from the movies was. a rlly weird and laughable line to end the season on. 

i just realized I was very negative there but overall I thought it was a fun show despite the pacing issues. I think the things they chose to revamp or callback to were interesting and good choices and it’s clear that we’re going to be getting a lot of the answers to questions in the next season (besides probably why they left australia in the first place but I digress) I thought the acting was well done and the character relationships were fairly strong for what is a 7 episode show: the siblings clearly cared about each other, didn’t do anything outrageously out of character to further the plot, mei (and joel while he was there) felt an organic addition to the group, and the villain felt like enough of a threat to keep things moving even when kaiju weren’t around. 

Ultimately I think I feel about the show the same way I do about uprising: It’s fun. There’s a lot you have to ignore to see it that way, but it brings up some interesting ideas and has a lot to offer if you can get past the issues.

[uhhhhyandere]

hey! hope it's not too weird to ask this on a yandere blog, but what nice or considerate things (if there are any lmfao) would Light from Orphic do for his s/o? it can be in a headcanon format, but I don't mind either way!!

headcanons??? i have never done them... but i want to so bad bc they always look so much fun to do and i love having fun. also, im sorry this was lost and you’ve had to wait three centuries i really am a terrible person who doesn’t know how to run a blog yet

so after writing my last glorious peace lets have some nice Light Yagami. just nice. considerate??? we’ll see. these turned out more light yagami in general. 

anything nice light yagami does is for a greater purpose. nothing is genuine. nothing. he’s 0/10. (love him tho) 

♢ So, Light obvi knows that if yall are together he can’t be manipulative, asshole, and bitch all the time, (he needs to hold things over your head and keep his charm so you still at least kinda like him)

♢ So, in this Orphic universe post-canon, he’s all about showmanship. His next step in his plan is building his own name so he can “come out” as Kira, so he kinda becomes like famous like L but everyone knows who he is kinda like Sherlock Holmes a bit

♢Getting that out of the way, Light is going to take you to those expensive ass restaurants and parties where high names are, where he knows he’s going to be seen. You just get to come along (you have to look nice in his eyes. u dont look good enough? get changed) yeah... not very nice

♢At parties as such, he’s all about appearances as a loving, doting boyfriend/fiance to his s/o. his arm is around your waist, he is joking with you, dancing with you, flirting with you like a high schooler, fixing your hair, giving you small kisses, everything

♢because he has to (but they’re nice at the moment)

♢in those restaurants he is pulling out your chair, holding your hand from across the table, smiling at your attempted jokes 

♢another not so fancy, elegant, showboat date is shopping!? grocery shopping, clothes shopping, etc. ignore the fact it’s about how he can control what you wear, eat, etc. , 

♢clothes shopping you get to try on outfits while he waits in the waiting area, having you turn and help you zip up a suit or dress, experiment with new clothes, and judgment from the store clerk who wants him away from the changing areas (if you identify as a female in the female locker room, that is)

♢he buys the clothes too

♢grocery shopping is fun too. you get to ask for snacks and he says no. you also get to ask to go out for lunch after and he also says no. it’s quality time???

♢also buys the groceries 

♢sometimes he will sneak a cake-like treat in there for you. 

♢another outside date I think he’d do is exercise dates. so playing tennis, going for walks/runs, going to the gym. he has to take care of himself to keep up his image, and, if you’re with him, your image as well. 

♢but he’s actually nice in these areas bc if you’re not so used to working out often he’s supportive and vocalizes his pride you’re there with him (is it just for show? the world may never know...) 

♢late night impromptu dates? you have to drag his ass but he will not have you walking to a grocery store at 3am for ice cream by yourself. With dark circles, he will accompany you and stand half-asleep next to you in the aisle as you decide between peanut butter blast, triple chocolate, or peanut butter triple chocolate with fudge. he’s protective after all. you did run off for four years.

♢more low-key inside the house stuff does happen 

♢cooking for you. he always be firing up the stove and trying new recipes. a big headcanon i have for him is being a super good cook given how self-sufficient he is. loves when you tell him it’s good.

♢when he’s uhh “writing” he’ll allow you to rest your head in his lap if he’s doing in on the bed or couch bc your home is hella private. Might use your head as a table though if his arms getting tired. 

♢when he’s done he’ll set it aside and run his fingers through your hair while he watches the late news. othertimes he’ll toss your head aside and walk away. it’s always a surprise with him.

♢also reads to you. mostly news and stories about kira from newspapers and scholarly articles. one day you’ll convince him to read you If You Give a Moose a Muffin. One day.

♢showering together! it’s going to be moreso of you washing him. another headcanon i have is he loves being bathed and washed by someone else. makes him feel powerful. especially if they’re your hands. you though? maybe. 

♢if it’s a bath, then sure you can slide in between those long legs and lie up against his back. not for long tho. when he gets stiff, he’s pushing you right out of there, but it’s nice while it lasts. 

♢movie nights! if you want to have one he better not have work that next morning or you’re SOL. but he will because he knows a lot of times you end up falling asleep and he can go to bed as well. 

♢he’s warm under the blankets. 

♢if you watch a scary movie and get scared, light will hit you with that “what’s scarier than a god of death?” and all of a sudden clowns aren’t so scary anymore considering who you’re cuddling with. 

♢loves when you hide into him. that power he has over you in those moments. 

♢speaking of the c-word

♢yes! honestly, okay. on the outside he’s like “bitch you’re disgusting don’t touch me” but on the inside, he loves having control over you. To have you cuddled up to him like he’s protecting you? he’s wanted you like this for so long. he’s going to enjoy it.

♢it’s moreso you wrapping your arms around him and him taking you all in. whether you be on the side, or lying on his chest and listening to his heartbeat.

♢he’s the knife big spoon. always. if you were the big spoon it’s an insult to his pride. he doesn’t need to be coddled. he wants to feel your form against him. focusing on how it feels and nothing else. nothing else but him.

♢in the end, this is light yagami. whether he is yandere or not, he is going to manipulate, put his appearance and yours first, have his facade game strong in public, and when not in public, he does things to remind himself and you that you are his to control, and he is yours to love and devote yourself to. He’ll do what he has to to make sure you know that, no matter if he hates it or not. 

[artsynimbus]

hello! and welcome to my tedtalk about how racism is rwby is godawful/godawfully executed :)

inb4 if this subject makes you uncomfortable, don’t read, move on to lighter posts----

anyway M&K and their ‘Racism’ in RWBY disgusts me- not to full on rant.. but I just find it funny how even in 2020 its very much a fact that racism is alive and well but also a very foreign concept to people who genuinely have never experienced an inkling of it in their lives.. these same people though love the idea/thought that being ‘aware’ of what the word means and how its overall construct is bad, is kudos enough for them to walk around with a fake woke badge hence the title..

Miles and Kerry dance around the subject of racism and drop sprinkles of it in the form of Blakes cat ears lowering when someone doesn't like her for being a faunus or the reoccuring old man with the bald head/busted hairline putting up a sign that says ‘no faunus allowed’.. thats it. The real damaging stuff that ends in black coded characters being abused, tortured or murdered via this very real construct in this fantasy world- ignored, never shown, told or roughly implied.. Also M&K had a whole character whos hatred of humans was born from this construct, branded on his whole face- but rather than get anything from that- they switch up his character from a menacing villain with a vague goal ( like cinder and roman) and hate for humans to an emotionally broken fuckboy pissed off that his ego was bruised by a girl who left his side.. and then to top it off they kill him.

Yeah all of that , while making sure the construct of racism is alive and well, and our main (human/whitecoded) characters who aren’t affected by it at all, move on and do fuck all- ignoring/aiding the problem that has been introduced since V1, addressed by only blackcoded characters, and solved by no one.. What is the overall message people are supposed to take from that? Suppress, write/kill off characters who have been affected by racism if they’re being ‘mean’ about it but keep the construct around cause why not- and our ‘heroes’ dont have to give a shit about it cause, it doesn’t affect them so why bother??? what a goofy mess and a grim overall image of the world of remnant and how similar it is to parts of the real world... but im not surprised the writers have a weird interest in fetishizing lesbians so i wouldn’t be shocked if they have a weird fixation getting off at the idea of oppressed people suffering just cause it mirrors real life.

but going back to our heroes and main characters who arent faunus.. Are these the heroes im supposed to like?? all of them doing nothing to address or even attempt to change a system that affects their faunus friends?? one of them is matter of factly related to one fo the main sources of the problem that plagues the faunus, but she hasn’t done anything about it right? Nah can’t have her do anything to aid that, cause then how will she and her family continue reap the benefits from this obviously terrible construct that allow black coded characters to suffer and her family to prosper? (Not gonna lie her growth is nice but why isn’t she doing anything about her family's dust company profiting off illegal faunus labor? Why hasnt that been addressed since v1? No ones talking about it anymore so its magically gone now??)

M&K: oH bUt ShE sPoKe Up AnD dEfEnDeD bLaKe WhEn PeOpLe WeRe BeINg MeAn To HeR!

yEs tHaNkS To tHiS, ThE RaCiSm iN YoUr eMoTiOnAlLy mAnIpUlAtIvE AnD MoRaLlY BaNkRuPt sHoW Is gOnE. hooray.

but whatever right, its not a big deal cause you hear about the suffering but don’t see it, that must mean its not important right? Yeah that message is just gonna fly over the heads of the people who seriously don’t get it cause the concept of racism is so foreign to them because again they’ve never been affected in any type of way by any form of said racism.

but yeah whatever, your only racist radical character was a mean scumbag and ppl didnt’ like him anyway, so lets get rid of him, oh and that character with the beautiful melanin and tiger ears, yeah lets kill her too cause while she wasn’t as terrible as the former we can’t have any faction leader exist that hates our human/whitecoded happy go lucky heroes or race of people, even though the story establishes half of them being super fucked up and the implication of our heroes silence on the subject of racism aids faunus oppression, but yes expanding further lets have our prominent character hailing from a company that benefits off this shit literally do nothing and address nothing all of the time she is at home and around her father--all the while lets keep dangling people being mean to the cute cat girl and call it racism and never find any means to solve it- that probs won’t trigger the fans that have experienced anything but this diet form of microaggression and beyond right?.. fuck our feelings right?

but no ones ready for that conversation- its okay for certain characters to get revenge but not others- its okay to forgive certain characters for their misdeeds, misgivings and misinformation but not others, its okay for certain characters to be straight up manipulative and evil, but not others- and the cherry on top of this fucked up parfait is being mean to cute faunus girls is perceived as a great way to present racism to fans who still don’t get it or care :D This just exposes how the writers do not know a damn thing about the subject they keep reminding you exists in almost every volume that they won’t remove or have white coded characters fight against... the only thing you’ll get is a bunch of sad sympathetic faces to the racism and microaggressions aimed at blake,and weiss being the main one saying “hey thats wrong youre rude.” What an ally.. forget anything i said prior to how her character could’ve dismantled 1 large part of faunus suffering, this right here is that good shit! Right?... but again, no ones ready for that convo.

Miles and Kerry are actual trashcans which makes sense as to how they’re garbage writers lul. anyway this has been my tedtalk. :)

[insertdisc5]

Yet Another Zelda Roleswap (the masterpost)

✨what's this AU?

Check THIS POST I DID that started it all and also the AU’s tag

✨in this au, the previous legends about the triforce are the same, aka “zeldas are princesses links are heroes and ganon/ganondorf is always the same guy and the big bad”! BUT THIS TIME DESTINY DID AN OOPSIE and ganondorf forgot all about his previous lives while link is the one who remembers them all!!! zelda just wants to travel and read cool legends and didnt expect to be part of one

✨ZELDA STUFF

-trans girl, found the name zelda in very very very old royal records

-she's like 16 or something

-seventh heir to the throne who wants to prove herself, so she goes on an adventure to save the world!!!!

-adventurous and impulsive and naive

-main weapon is bows, she also knows magic and sheikah techniques

-has six siblings who dont really pay attention to her. shes probably the youngest

-her point of view is very black and white at first

-even when she gets in the middle of link and ganon’s story she still doesn’t believe she is The Zelda of legend

-how could she she’s just a zelda, one among many, just a kid playing at being a princess

-(she IS the zelda)

-she gets a bird AND a white horse!!!!

-if she sees a weird cave she WILL go into it 

-would probably eat moss if dared

✨LINK STUFF

-genderfluid, uses he/they

-hes in his early twenties

-a man zelda meets during her travels, who seems to know a lot about old legends

-he can see koroks and fairies, who can’t be seen by most people

-gets all his past lives' memories after he gets the master sword, over a period of a day or two

-maybe link does remember his past deaths along with his past lives, but past deaths are maybe more muted…. less like he experienced them and more like someone told him about it. still fucks him up tho

-i feel like he’d be pretty nice and sleepy all the time, until you mention something that has to do with his memories (aka, ganondorf, but also like “oh ive heard some hero in the legends went back to being a kid to save the world or whatever) and he’d get this super serious, focused look… something like that, little things that would make zelda go :^?

-he just really wants to kill ganondorf ya dig

-SO MANY BOSS FORMS probably one per main title (kinda like xant’s battle in TP) (strongest/hardest to fight is majora’s mask link), and final form is definitely some twisted looking fierce deity

-as for his past selves he has all of their memories and its kind of… they’re not him, he’s him, they’re just memories that he has, but when he is very very stressed its “memories become actual personalities for a sec” time. 99% of the time its just him and then ganondorf is there and its like WILL EVERYONE SHUT UP IM TRYING TO MAKE A MURDER HERE

-he’s not controlled by malice or anything because it would feel like a deus ex machina to me

-in the end he doesnt die and he gets redemption because he didnt hurt anyone he just tried to kill ganondorf a few times hes good, and also zelda is his friend and an heir to the throne he’s got immunity. poor guy just needs help processing all those lives and needs a cabin in the woods with some fairies!!!

-re: his past lives, oot link SUPER HATES ganondorf while ww link is more sympathetic. links who havent fought ganondorf are ambivalent about him

-endgame ship is either with ganondorf OR beedle. beedle is the secret ending

-will eat moss

✨GANONDORF STUFF

-he's in his twenties i promise he just has resting old man face

-zelda’s old childhood friend

-doesn’t remember anything about his past lives

-gerudo king, very serious but fairly well loved

-lets not talk about malice it either doesnt exist/this ganondorf doesnt have any/this ganondorf knows how to control it. either way its not gonna affect the story

-”what are you wearing today king” “oh, just whatever” (its not whatever he spent hours finding the day’s outfit)

-found out about his past lives while reading a very very very old book, probably read it and stayed in his room for a week and then promised himself to never ever ever turn out like that

-genuinely a good person

-would never eat moss

✨RELATIONSHIPS STUFF

-zelda and ganondorf actually knew each other as kids! Both being royalty and all. legends do talk about a hero a princess a beast or whatever but don’t use link or ganondorf’s names since it’s been so long- it takes zelda and ganondorf both finding old, old books on their own to be like “AH OOPS”!!! Ganondorf learns about his past lives much earlier than zelda, who finds out during her adventures, and she goes from seeing ganondorf as a dear friend to being like “…but what if he’s really bad though”

they’re old childhood friends, you know, the kind that were best friends before and then grew up and saw each other less often (different kingdoms and all) so they kinda grew apart, and then zelda starting her quest made them reconnect again! Ganondorf is a little older than zelda so he always saw her more as his little sister who just jumps into mud because she totally saw a sword there i promise, and zelda sees ganondorf as her cool older brother who actually pays attention to her, unlike her actual siblings

-when link and zelda meet, zelda’s like “weird dude but probably harmless” and link is like “weird girl but probably harmless” and then she’s like “oh my name is zelda” and link goes “ah just likeWAIT” and he kinda observes her to… gauge her abilities? My Zeldas Were Better kinda thing. i guess during their final battle he’s like “you’re really a zelda, after all” and its bittersweet

the second zelda figures out link is also part of those legends she goes full hero worship mode, which makes link’s fall from grace… really… hard on her. ive been admiring you and wanting to be a hero like you all this time, turns out you’re not a hero and also Not Okay

-re ganondorf and link, after everything that happened uuuh

human brain: it probably takes them both a long while to get used to each other, given that one was almost killed by the other and the other has vivid memories of having their world(s) destroyed by the one, but after a while they probably bond over their shared uuuuh memories i guess. link visits gerudo city once in a while and they catch up and become friends and

lizard brain: after 100k words they DATE

no i wont write how it happens you will NOT make me embarrass myself in front of everyone because i earnestly wrote about how link visits ganondorf every time he’s in gerudo country and at first link just passes by to give ganondorf news about how zelda is faring as queen and news about the world, and as time goes and years go by  they start talking about their lives and struggles and just taking walks across the desert together and having sand seal races and everyone in ganondorf’s court is like “so when’s that little voe coming back” and ganondorf is like “i neither know nor care that its been three months since his last visit” and everyone’s like (smirk) “okay” and when has he even started to look forward to link’s visits anyway how did this happen and then link comes back and smiles gently and shows ganondorf this cool rock he found that looks like ganondorf’s face and ganondorf is smitten

takes them both Y E A R S to realize their feelings and then date tho. slow burn or bust

✨WORLD STUFF

-takes place in a time where the games’ adventures are only known as legends where they didnt even write down ganondorf’s and link’s names

-now that im thinking about it it wouldnt happen like THOUSANDS OF YEARS after any game because then ganon and link wouldnt be that worried about their destiny??? so maybe like 100-200 years after a game??? and the ppl writing down the legends were just terrible bookkeepers who couldnt even think write down link and ganon’s name

-(smash voice) EVERYONE IS HERE!!!!!!!! tingle and agitha the bug princess and sidon and especially groose who is uuuuum zelda’s rival who is totally not in love with her

-i think in botw its implied koroks are only seen by people like link and zelda??? so id say only people with uuuuh magical power??? can see them???? so koroks are just doin their thing, playing pranks, helping people without them knowing, and, in the case of makar, playing romantic music around couples

[cyclone-rachel]

this is sOOO late and im sorry, but what are your thoughts on the latest episode and s5 of supergirl so far?? :D

so season 5 was… difficult to get into, at first? There were a lot of things happening, and moments that I liked (Kara’s new suit and her in general, any scene Kelly and Alex shared, I really liked James, J’onn was very good, there was some stuff with Brainy I enjoyed, I weirdly liked Lena and Eve/Hope’s whole thing for example although that was a lot thanks to Supergirl Radio, etc.), but every episode I was worried about what was going to happen and so I couldn’t actually focus on a lot of it?

This continued for the first 4 episodes, I think. But from episode 5 on, I don’t know if things changed, but I found them easier to like personally and I spent less time worrying about them. Especially 7, and not just because I got to podcast about it. 8 was fine? Not the best midseason finale we’ve ever had, but it tied some things up.

I don’t know how to feel about Crisis, so we’re just gonna skip that, and I will say that I’ve really enjoyed both 5x10 and 5x11, the post-Crisis universe has been very good and interesting so far.

it’s almost like before then, the episodes had been… inhibited.

ha.

Kidding.

But seriously, on 5x11 as a whole:

I just want to say that I appreciated Brainy’s new aesthetic in the opening scene, as well as him setting things up so that he could get Winn out of there. That all was pretty cool, although what would he have done if someone other than Winn had gotten out of the bus first? What was that Winn thinking when he saw Brainy there, waiting for him? What are Brainy’s thoughts on time-travel movies, and would he like them enough to quote them?

it’s not guilt-free for you if you don’t need to feel guilt in the first place when eating chocolate because you don’t gain weight, Kara.

(the girls night scene was cute! I liked that that all was discussed, and I wish we got more scenes that were similar.)

I didn’t catch that Winn’s dad was into virtual reality at first, but that was very interesting and definitely made sense for the end of the episode. And I’m not sure how Lex knows so much about this alternate universe Winn? But he certainly got on his good side very well.

really big of Lena to admit that she needs Lex’s help, but they are working together, and this is a new universe where things are different now, so I feel like she meant it

love how Lena immediately is put off by Brainy being there, not because he was her friend and it’s weird that they’re meeting at that point, but because he arrived with Lex (was he in the same vehicle as Lex and Toyman? Or did he get there on his motorcycle?) and because he’s friends with Supergirl, which Lena knows very well. But Brainy’s acting was very good, and keeps him from being found out.

what exactly did Kara do to get her Pulitzer in this universe?

I hope that there is an action figure made of Supergirl in her new suit

I’m sure Lex really likes casually using the word “crisis”

damn. Kara’s slow walk out after she changed costumes was very cool, she looked very powerful and I love her

our Winn was Very Dramatic in the first scene he appeared in, but he’s still great and I missed him

also I appreciate how his suit is Ravenclaw colors, I feel like that maybe wasn’t intentional but it could be? I hope he designed the other Legionnaires’ suits to be more colorful, as well.

(I really want to see his reaction to Brainy’s new suit!)

I also liked the reveal that he has a wife and kid, that’s a perfect explanation as to why he’s stayed in the future (how long has it been for him?)

and I had no issue at first with his wife being named Ayla, because 1. my captions spelled it as Aila, so she could be someone completely different from the Legionnaire mentioned in 3x10, 2. if she really was the same Ayla, she could easily be bisexual and previously have been in relationships with women. who knows, we don’t have enough information. I’m upset about it as much as other comics fans are, and wish it was acknowledged, but on the show itself I think it’s fine for now.

Alex and Kara’s reactions to Winn coming back were so good, and if Brainy wasn’t trying to hide his emotions/guilt, I think he might’ve wanted to hug him too.

what “old friend” are you calling to keep the Legion ship safe, Alex?

I really missed Andrea, I didn’t realize it until now but I did and I want the best for her.

LENA’S FUZZY PURPLE COAT. it looked very nice and warm.

Secret elevator! (just imagine that in the tune of “Secret Tunnel” from Avatar the Last Airbender)

The tower!

I was almost expecting Kara to say “Arrow-cave” to be honest

it’s a very cool set in general, looking forward to seeing more of it, and I like the callsigns on the wall.

Winn, please tell us more about these very important things

my headcanon was that our Winn used the name Toyman as a way of reclaiming his father’s name for good, but I don’t think that works anymore. whoops

I feel like Alex might know something is up with Brainy? Or at least she’s going to suspect.

aw, I’m sure Kara felt bad about people writing articles about Winn originally. did she have to in season 3?

aww, I really enjoyed Nia’s reaction to the Tower, and her whole conversation with Winn. Also for what it’s worth I’m glad that Nura does still actually exist?

And she used her dreaming powers! I’m very happy about that! It’s good!

still no idea why Nia calls Brainy wildcat. I know it was because of that one movie Brainy referenced in 4x15 and 5x05, but… would appreciate an explanation, thanks.

Winn’s conversation with Kara is GREAT, this is exactly the kind of good heartwarming stuff I expected from a family reunion like this

I knew Lex was going to be sneaking around on a Legion ship! although we still don’t know how Brainy’s Legion ship is there, when we all saw it leave in the season 3 finale.

Uh… I don’t know how I feel about the fight scene? it’s fine? I like Kara’s super-speeding everyone out of there more, though

that Winn and Winn conversation was real tense and I appreciated it a lot

David did a very good job! this scene with William and Kara was kind of a natural progression of their already-established dynamic, and like you said, a way to make the next episode’s subplot for them seem more natural! of course Kara would take offense to that sandwich! people are just mean!

TRIVIAL PURSUIT PARTNER

what. did Winn and Brainy and everyone play trivial pursuit in season 3. when did they have time for this. is this how Kara decided to introduce the Legion to more 21st century pop culture. how did Winn decide that Brainy was a good partner for him, when they were rivals in the second half of season 3. I want to know.

anyway I love this scene. I love how easily Brainy tells Winn the truth and how genuinely sorry he is, and how much Winn understands Brainy and what he’s done, even if he’s still angry about what happened.

also Brainy crying when Winn calls him his friend is my reaction whenever someone says something really nice to me.

Brainy needs a hug, is what I’m saying. thanks.

lol I feel like the word “defiance” was really pointed there, for Jesse

also 

cousin? Cousin?? Cousin???

I know nothing about this. I thought Winn was stopping Brainy’s great-great grandfather. that completely threw me. I’m sorry. what’s happening with this, I want to know everything.

this Lex and Lena scene is very pretty and also very tense, and I’m wondering why Lena chose that beach image?

game night is very cute! I like that Nia is feeling better! Also Alex continuing to say “she’s terrible” while Kara is taking her turn at Jenga, a very sister-y thing

I can’t believe Winn is using the fake name “Marty”, he definitely did that on purpose, what a dork

yeah that last scene really puts the whole “Toyman is eternal” thing into a new light, doesn’t it

[ellerevelle]

okay so im feeling crazy and detached again (as usual lately)

but instead of spiraling into absolute fucking panic, I’m deciding to take today to just ... not wholly subscribe to this manner of thinking BUT. JUST FOR NOW. I feel like taking some of the craziness flack off myself and blaming it on some shit outside of myself. Because feeling this weird and detached cant all just be me. So here’s a brainstorming of whats got me fucked up, in no particular order: 

Trump is our stupid President

That guy who told me he loved me daily and asked me to be his girlfriend after basically living with me immediately after meeting me and I fell for hard despite a ton of red flags CHEATED on me while I was away visiting home. 

And then blamed it on MY bad communication? fuck that guy. 

But now I see one of the girls he slept with (multiple times, three days in a row) I see her everywhere all the time in everyones instagrams, at everyones parties... ugh. 

Um. People are dying. Close to me. More importantly and spefcifically women I love are dead. 

I didnt get to see Inga before she died. I was too busy forging a relationship with CHEATER GUY. Didnt get home in time to see her. Talk to her. 

Grandma. This has been the whole first year without her, come November. Its subtle, but terrible and I hate it. She was my last matriarch. The last woman who’s blood is in me. 

because Mom’s dead too. And has been since August of 2015. 2015, right? God it feels like forever ago now, probably because I’ve pushed it away. She died unexpectedly and NO ONE IN MY FAMILY HAS SAID THE WORD SUICIDE OUT LOUD even though thats what happened. She OD’d on prescribed opiate painkillers to escape her depression. And we NEVER talk about it. 

So I kindof feel insane. Not talking about things that are clearly there. Like, are they not clearly there for anybody else? Now all my women are gone. My brother literally avoids talking about feelings. My dad is a little more receptive but is more the comforting type than the forthcoming, express onesself type. Getting sentimentality out of my brother is like pulling teeth sometimes. But yet if his son does something cute, its God’s Work and he cant help but cry and get that beautiful lovie squishy look on his face. 

I’m jealous of my own nephew. I see the way my Mom loved me, in the way my Brother loves his son. And I miss being that perfect to somebody. My Dad loves me forever and always and there isnt a word for how grateful I feel for our relationship. I dont take that for granted at all. It actually kindof scares me because... hah, well what if Dad dies? Like, before I’m ready? I’ll be even MORE fucked! 

Anyways. Austins been pissing me off. I’m sorry but although Polyamory is possible and cool and im sure quite beautiful for many, 

The Austin poly scene is fucked and tainted and a bunch of slutty people having orgies and not TALKING about anything and its ruining the healthy vibe poly is incumbent upon. 

So, whatever I’m angry. So fuck that noise. 

I feel like because of cheater guy and my anger at the psuedo poly orgy sexy bullshit scene in Austin, I feel like I’ve broken up with a whole group of friends. Like, I dont want to be around any of it. I dont want to see you eat mushrooms and twerk. I dont want to see your stupid, super naked outfit. I dont think its hot you carry a flogger or can pole dance or slink around like a tarantino character. It used to be hot and thrilling and fun, when I felt like it was connected and for love and sharing and caring. But now it all just is slutty and vapid and useless and cold. Like a sad clown. And thats not sexy, its dark and desperate. *this is about both VERY particular people and broad general strokes. There are several extremely amazing friends in the scene and outskirts thereof that truly inspire me and dont fall into this catagory in my mind, although they’d probably still be angry with me for dissing things ^^ the way I just did but. fuck it, this is MY journal entry and I can be irrational if I want to. 

You cant be open fucking minded ALL the time. Sometimes people really arent acting with anyones best intentions but their own. I’ve used up SO MUCH FUCKING ENERGY making myself soften and open and “woke” and trying to go with everybodys flow. And I’m exhausted and over it. I have my own principles and theres nothing wrong with having differing opinions than someone else. 

All summer I’ve been feeling like I’m a bad person for not liking or not understanding this hyper sexual scene in Austin. I thought, “why am I shaming a scene thats giving me opportunity to really shine and be free?” when, in an IDEAL world, yes thats what the scene could be. But in what actually fucking unfolds -- humans SUCK and dudes SUCK and girls SUCK and everybody (especially when horny) are fucking STUUUUPIIIIIDDDD and ideals get thrown out the window! people arent nearly as “woke” as I gave them the actual credit for. Seriously. So! I’m fuckin OUTTIE! 

I’ve felt broken up with a whole scene. FUck cheater guy, fuck poly, fuck orgies, fuck people who are reckless with my love. 

Back to the list:

I’ve been eating too much out of boredom. Which I’ll blame on lack of quality social interaction in this town. Where are the scholars? Where are the sexy edgy BRAINY people? I’m tired of hot people in little clothing in the summer. 

Ah! Another thing for the list. its been TOO FUCKING HOT OUT. FOR MONTHS. 100 DEGREES FOR MONTHS. thats enough to make anyone insane. 

So i’m sick of teenie boppers in their nothing outfits in the heat. 

I want old smart people in peacoats. I miss books and weather and frowns. Irritable debates about literature or physics or religious theories. 

I only like my own brand of cigarettes. 

My roommates are annoying me. I dont really like my house anymore. Theres too many humans and not enough square footage. Four people to one kitchen is TOO MUCH SHIT. EVERYONE BUYS THEIR OWN BANANAS AND THEY ALLLLLL GO BROWN ON THE TABLE. thats four peoples worth of bad bananas. FUcking stupid. 

I dont have a hairdresser here. Sometimes when I feel shitty I like to throw money at the problem. Buy something. Get a haircut. See a show. Etc. 

And my hairdresser love is in Philadelphia and getting a flight to get a haircut is slightly insane (without a longer visit)

I miss Adam. 

What else can I blame my upset on. Shitty politics, shitty weather, shitty social sexual scene in my town, I dont like my house, I dont like my hair. Its too expensive to live here. No one in my immediate acquaintance or friend circle seems interested in the sort of romantic relationship I’m seeking, nor if they did does anyone have the “it” factor I look for which I’ll *try* to describe maybe in another post. 

So. I sit inside my room and try to fix stupid remedial things as if itd make a big impact. I tidy and put away clothes in attempt to feel less cluttered but am too scared to make BIG cuts and BIG changes. So instead I light insence and watch netflix and eat too much. I have started going to Barre3 again more and have been semi regular with therapy so thats something. 

I really ought to start doing “morning pages” like the book Fiona loaned me suggests in its FIRST GODDAMN CHAPTER. But, alas, I am lazy. 

No, I have become recently lazy. 

I’m spoiled. I dont do things I dont want to do. Its a major character flaw. I only push and struggle if I see worthyness in it, and lately theres been serious lack of evidence of that in, well, anything.

 #depression! 

so, I guess in summation- because nothing has been a WORTHWHILE struggle, EVERYTHING feels like a struggle. Humph. thats... thats not good. But it does, because i dont see the worth in a lot of goals or tasks or even relationships, (and i dont mean the greedy “what can I GET for ME out of this!” sort of b.s.) (I mean the... conserve precious energy, is this going to teach me something or help me grow as a person or bring love into my life sort of vibe) ...

when I dont think the energy expenditure is going to pay off, I dont do it. Or I do it half way or lazily or with tentative fear. I guess I could do an experiment and just do everything with HOPE and see if my energy put in will get a different result... but. like. I feel like I did that all summer and he cheated on me. And my “friends” said “dont be angry, be poly” and I couldnt call on my Mom or Grandma and so I call on eating and isolation and running away to visit home where no one cares I dont have a job. where the house is big and the air is cold and my friends are smart. 

I really miss Kristian. That was one of the greatest feelings of self love in my entire life. I felt like, if someone that special noticed ME. Saw ME. Little old, semi chubby, not famous ME, and wanted me around for a couple tour dates. Then I ought to believe in myself TOO. I wanted to dance, I wanted to make art, I wanted to take photos, I wanted to be bold, I wanted to be humble, I felt so open and content with myself. I was motivated to work out, I was motivated to eat healthy and clean and small portions. It was easy. It felt so fun. I loved him. I dreamt big. My imagination was so warm and excited. My inner critic was GONE. 

But he faded away. He got back with his ex. The shooting star left the sky. I’m still grateful for the experience at all, but. 

I feel a little stupid for thinking anything could’ve happened. 

And I truly miss feeling so special and excited about life. 

I dont want to run away from Austin out of fear. But I cant tell if I’m unhappy and want to leave genuinely, or if this is the spoiled part of me thats like, “this sucks, lets leave.” instead of pushing though, curating something better with some struggle, and sticking it out. 

How do people make big life decisions like this? I feel like thats what marriages do. People stay together and fight. But sometimes they get divorced anyways, its just been longer. More years wasted. When maybe it wouldve been healthier to leave sooner and cut the cord and be free to live without, sooner. 

I really like a lot of things about this city. But I really dislike a lot too. And I cant tell where I want my life to go, in a grand sense, so its hard to pick which attributes will matter in the long run. 

I dont think I should leave yet. Maybe a new house. Or like, serious efforts to declutter this one. Is this just excuses? Ugh. 

Declutter this house. If that doesnt feel better, leave the house and move to a new part of austin. If that doesnt feel better, leave austin. 

I need a job. 

[jupiterparker]

Goldfish Part Two (p.p)

Part One

Words count: 1.6k

Paring: Peter Parker x Reader 

Warnings: unedited, but thats not new :)

A/N: hope you enjoy!

Request: yes or no

In which -> Peter persuades and drags you to the fair

Masterlist

An hour or two later, you guys finish the project, parting ways and only acknowledging each other in passing or in class. After all, it wasn’t like you were friends, or at least, you didn’t consider you guys to be friends as much as you wanted to be. So it was especially weird when Peter came up to you with a ticket to the nearby fair after a couple weeks of just nodding to each other. 

He had caught you by your locker, and seemed pretty nervous about it. It had looked like he had been pacing back and forth for sometime, as that’s what he had been doing when you turned the corner.

Looking up at you, he finally stopped pacing, and ran his hand though his hair, taking a deep breath to calm down. Once he deemed himself calm enough, he asked “So… Y/N, do you want a ticket to the fair?” You weren’t excepting this at all, but you were definitely confused why Peter was approaching you with a ticket.

“Uhh, sure, are you selling them? How much?” You asked cautiously, lighting scratching your head as you were trying to think if he has mentioned this previously to you and if you just forgot like usual. Nah, probably not, considering that all you did was wave and say hi in the hallways to each other.

“Oh! No, no” Peter replied frantically, shaking his head, “It’s just an extra ticket that I had, that I was curious if you wanted.” You raised an eyebrow, finding the whole thing suspicious, as after all, why would someone give a stranger something free without wanting something in return.

Biting your lip, you weighed your options before finally replying back “Um, then in that case, I’ll take it. But you are sure you don’t need it, right?” 

“Yeah! 100 percent, no more like 200 percent!” Peter replied, almost screaming. You winced slightly at the level of enthusiasm, but at least you knew that he was sure.

“Okay then… maybe I can convince my sister to come with me” you let him know, so he could be assured that the ticket wasn’t going to waste. 

But it turns out, letting the ticket go to waste was never in his plans, as he clarified saying “Oh, sorry, I didn’t make myself clear, I was hoping that you could come with us”.

“Us as in?” You asked, unsure about who you would be spending the day with.

“Ned, MJ,” he replied back and you fought the urge to smack yourself. Of course that who would be coming, they were his friends, but he wasn’t done yet, “maybe Liz?”

“Oh..” you whispered, as you didn’t really know how to reply, especially to the last part. Liz was coming. And you didn’t understand why that caused a rush of sadness over you. In fact, Liz was super nice to you… and Peter it seems.

But Peter was still waiting for a response, so you snapped out of it shaking your head slightly replying “Sure, that will be fun, when are you guys planning on going? I can meet you guys there.”

“Oh tomorrow after school, and I can take you, its no problem” Peter offered, wanting to make sure you would come. But seeing your hesitation and guilt (because you didn’t want extra work to be done to accommodate you) he added on “Im taking Liz anyways.” 

Oh Liz again, are they on a date? Now you really didn’t want to take the ride, so you asked him “If you are sure, I don’t want to intrude on anything”.

“Huh? Oh no, you’re not, don’t worry” Peter assured, smiling at you. 

“Sure then-” you started, but stopped once you thought of a way to get out of the ride, “oh wait, I have to go home anyway to make a snack for my sister, but I’m close by the fair anyways, so I’ll just meet you all there?” Peter looked a little glum at that, but nodded anyways as he couldn’t really argue with that. 

Ready to leave school, you closed your locker and left, only thinking about how glad you were to have avoided that, as you weren’t really close with all of them yet, even Peter.

Once you reached the fairground, you called out them to grab their attention “You were right where you said you would all be, huh.” Everyone looked in your direction, and you raised your phone up so they could locate you better. 

“Of course, where else would we be?” Peter joked once you were closer.

You rolled your eyes at him, and noticed that you were the last one to arrive. “I didn’t make you guys wait did I?” you asked feeling guilty.

“Not at all, I’m glad you could make it!” Liz said, before anyone could even respond, reaching forward to give you a hug. You leaned forward too, accepting the hug as you glanced over at the rest of them.

“So where are we headed first?” You asked everyone, not sure if they already had a game plan or not. It was also your first time at a fair, but you weren’t letting anyone know that.

“We were talking and had some ideas, but what do you want to do?” Peter asked, curious about your response. Unfortunately for you, that meant you had to spill your little secret.

“Well, you see” you started, rocking back and forth, a little nervous, “I’ve never been to any fair, so I have no clue” you confessed, with did startle them a little bit. 

Thankfully for you, they just moved on from that, not really teasing you about it. Unknown to you, that was mainly because of Peter, as he had noticed your uncomfortable expression while talking the group, and was currently pinching Ned to stop his laughs and jokes from coming out.

Peter’s eyes lit up once he realized what that meant. “Okay then, its has been decided. Drumroll please!” He paused, flicking everyone off when no one did a drumroll and looked at him like he was being stupid, which he was in your opinion, “Okay, you guys are all spoil sports then. But we are going to the fair games first!” Everyone but you groaned at that, but still followed Peter to the fair games.

On your way there, Ned had moved away from Peter to go walk with Liz and MJ because he didn’t want more pinching, which resulted with you walking along side Peter. Which was a very long walk cause apparently it was on the complete opposite side from where they were. 

The walk there was awkward to say the least. Which made sense to you, considering the fact you guys hadn’t really hung out since the project anyways. But right now, you were hoping that he wouldn’t bring up the whole ‘not ever going to the fair before’ thing now that it was just you two.

“So” Peter started, a sly smile creeping onto his face. You groaned at this as you knew luck was not going to be on your side forever, “You’ve never been to the fair before? May I ask why?”

You looked at Peter quickly, your face showing a mild surprise. You were expecting something that was a lot more of teasing, but he seemed genuine about his curiosity. “Just never found time, my sister doesn’t like the idea of the fair, and as a family we would never go to places unless she also liked them” you explained slowly, very aware of the fact that Peter was staring at you throughout the full explantation. 

“Your family would take your sister’s preference but not yours? Doesn’t seem fair” Peter commented, his mood a little sour as he did feel bad for you.

Noticing his change in mood, you nudged his shoulder telling him “Hey don’t look so glum, I’m here now aren’t I? Also while it might seem unfair, my sister is the pickiest in the family, and I enjoy seeing her happy. Besides, the fair is literally one of the only things we differ on.” At your explanation, Peter let out a little snort, which caused a sense of relief to arise in you. After all, you would feel terrible if you were the reason why Peter was in such a bad mood in such a bright place. 

At this thought, you looked around the fair in slight awe. Sure you’ve seen it from your apartment, but being in the fair, surrounded by such bright and vibrant colors and the smell of the fair food was a complete different experience. 

And then you were brought back to the present by Peter with the sound of a camera click. You turned to see Peter looking into the camera display, grinning like a madman. Where he got the camera you had no idea. But as you two continued walking side by side, you strained your neck to look at your picture. However, Peter turned it off before you could look, giving you a smirk, “Its rude to look at other people’s things without permission you know.”

Sighing you waved him off and chose to ignore his comment, instead asking, “So what are we going to do at the fair games then?”

“Win” Peter replied, but the look in his eye told you that there was a catch.

Rolling your eyes, you said“I know that smartass, win what?” as you were curious about the real reason why he had chosen fair games.

Peter smiles at your question, and you knew that you were going to regret asking that. He took your hand and dragged you to the first game, ignoring the calls from his friends and told you, “Some goldfishes.”

Permanent Taglist: @djjffkd, @pallored, @your-daily-dose-of-fangirl, @penisprkr, @tuttigunner, @doihavetobesocialrightnow,  @supernatural-strangerthings-1980, @lovelyh0lland, @sprinklemetommy, @marvelsmagics, @yoinksholland, @21-chemicalpanicboys, @tomsfireheart, @hello-love06, @embrace-themagic, @fireboltrose7559, @ourdeliciousfoxcollector, @what-is-yeet, @lubrielx, @ticklishrainbow, @ukulele-tea-and-ocean, @adorablyparker, @onlyfangirlsunderstand, @avenged-nightmare, @captnsmarvels, @rainbow-marvel

Ask or DM me if you want to be added to my taglist!

[macbookpro-hard-drive]

HI HOW DO YOU WRITE CHARACTERS

hewwo! i can answer this! im literally gonna do a quick list of both deh and bmc characters for u under this readmore! :D

im gonna start with deh because smaller cast!

evan: 

isn’t so much stuttery as he tends to repeat things and uh stammer a bit here and there. stutters over his words sometimes but it’s more l-like this and uh, like… like this

evan hansen has anxiety. he is not anxiety. evan hansen fucks up and makes mistakes and probably internalizes a lot of things. very polite when in public but he can be a bit snappy (as seen w evans comment abt how zoe’s parents have never been poor i believe? it was something he said to zoe)

soft spoken, most of the time. probably not the kind of guy to vocally ask for things until he’s at a comfortable enough point that he feels like he’s not bothering you (same buddy)

i see evan as someone who gets frustrated with himself easily. not as a sense of “god i wish i were normal” but more of a “i should be able to do this, why cant i do this, i want to do this but i cant” because sometimes it’s just a matter of i literally cant do this and i dont know why? and god its so frustrating sometimes

jared:

jared kleinman is a fucking asshole and he knows it. very sarcastic and uses it to cover up his own insecurities, probably the kind of dude who laughs in your face when you tell him off when internally he’s just OH FUCK OH SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK

a lot of ppl write jared as being insecure abt his weight and tbh i don’t see that being a problem for him? i see jared as being insecure abt the fact he comes off very snarky and assholeish but he turns it around and tries to own it even though… that’s not something you want to be proud of? and he knows that

not the kind of dude who stops to assess his feelings. he powers through shit and insists he’s okay until he’s out of steam. i think it was psy who said he’s a “needs therapy boi” and tbh she’s right? 

can be very passive aggressive imo it’s something he really needs to work on.

arrogant, sarcastic, and just a big fucking dick who needs to learn how to watch his mouth.

zoe:

not an pure baby angel, by any means. we’re at a disadvantage because we only see zoe when she’s sort of grieving (because grief can and will come in different ways, and while i see her as not missing connor, i do think that her pushing away her feelings is a form of her grieving imo? it’s a weird thing to explain but there’s a part of zoe that does miss (the old) connor’s presence as w the fake emails evan “gave her her brother back” (albeit a very fake version of connor) and sort of standoffish when it comes to the subject of connor

a bit of an ambivert. extremely outgoing when she’s around her friends or when it comes to music and other things she loves.

very individualistic! her style tends to have doodles on her clothes, she dyes her hair a lot, she probably would be the kind of person to make her own jewelry!

very sweet. the castng call for zoe describes her as being the kind of person who learns the names of the kids who sit alone at lunch and thats she goes out of her way to be nice to people since. connor. yeah.

thats all ive got for zoe but u can always send questions in and i can say yes or no after i ask my pals too

alana:

smart gal! valedictorian! president! i love her! tends to overshare a bit. anxiety + depression gal.

probably into gardening tbh? i can see alana having succulents in her room and maybe a dog that just chills with her.

dont be afraid to make alana mouthy. alana is someone whos extremely headstrong in her actions imo and does what she believes is right, even if others dont believe that. like… think about the fact that she literally published what was believed to be connor’s suicide note because she thought it’d get them the last bit of help they needed for the orchard. it literally fucked the murphys over - but she never considered that?

very much an extrovert. just really wants to belong, man. very optimistic on the surface but i can see her being a little less so underneath. she looks on the bright side because if she doesnt, she doesnt know who will and idk i dont think alana’s the kind of person who just... lets that risk be there.

connor:

we dont kno much abt connor in canon but uhhh…. i can see connor as being a loner, sort of aggressive by accident (tbh this dude’s probably used to people being a dick to him so he’s just sorta standoffish in response) but like… whenever i write connor i usually write him as getting better? he’s gotten the help he needs and he’s doin better 

artsy depressed dude. poetry, painting, ect - whatever u want tbh. i just see connor, with help, finding himself in art or something creative (theatre and music included! u do u!)

very much a reader. this dude both has a lot of books on his bookshelf and a lot more books he hasnt fucking read because hes terrible at reading new books. (i personally hc he loves all of poe’s work)

to sorta sum connor up: bold, but not outgoing. caring, but not obvious with it (once he gets help btw). easily angered but sometimes he just doesn’t fucking know why and that frustrates him further. troubled.

honestly if u want to see one of my fave connors - check out @ask-sincerely-memes​! i rly love how they portray all three of the boys, but connor is by far my favorite! (mod con and/or mod ev if u read this i love u)

OK ONTO THE BMC FUCKERS if you want to kno abt the adults for either show then feel free to ask

jeremy:

anxiety boy, but not evan hansen level of anxiety. more just… self deprecating, not super confident in himself, probably underestimates himself a lot.

jeremys hard to explain sometimes because a lot of his actions and dialogue comes naturally since i can actually relate to jeremy a lot, personality-wise? a really good fact to throw out there is i don’t think jeremy’s the kind of guy who just goes for stuff sometimes. he has to sorta be hyped up by others imo. michael motivated him to sign up for the play, rich and michael both played parts in getting him squipped (michael in the aspect of “lets check this out and see if its legit” bc i doubt jeremy would have genuinely done that on his own).

which really means jeremy isnt the kind of guy to just… confess things, unless it’s built up enough (i.e. jeremys confrontation w reader in unlonely since it was a conversation he’d been thinking about for a bit). in canon, he didnt really… confess to christine without the help of alcohol (at the halloween party) or without other people building him up (voices in my head). 

im literally rereading jeremy fics rn because im trying to come up with a good way of describing him

extremely horny teenage boy. hormones suck. for anyone who writes nsfw: i dont see jeremy being incredibly kinky and sexual and dominant (god forbid) his first fucking time having sex. especially if its both him and the readers first time. sex can be clumsy. you can laugh during sex. but also sex smells. like… once you’ve smelled it, you fucking know it - its just a weird combo of sweat and bodily fluids. 

that last part was just a PSA for ppl.

lightweight boy. a lot bolder when drunk. thank you.

honestly if u have any questions abt jeremy, i can try to answer them more specifically but this is as general as i can get.

michael

not an uwu anxious depressed innocent baby boy uwu. remember that michael literally withheld the mtn dew red from jeremy because he wanted an apology. remember that michael wouldnt have been squipped because michael had been completely comfortable with who he is. michael likes his place. he doesn’t want to be cool and popular - he likes who he is. michael in the bathroom was a peak moment of michael finally letting go of emotions he’d been withholding - jeremy calling him a “loser” was the final straw that broke him. thank u this has been a psa.

a goofy boy. probably snorts when he laughs and im not projecting there what are you talking about-

okay, canonically: likes video games, likes retro shit (probably the kind of nerd who LIVES for arcades and record stores and vintage clothing stores even if he doesnt mix that into his personal style), very into music. there’s a lot you can do with this! 

imo he’s very caring? like. okay, yes he did withhold mtn dew red from jeremy - but michael still went through the trouble of finding and obtaining that in order to deactivate the squip. i think michael’s a fairly understanding dude, even if he has moments of anger.

just a very warm person. probably the kind of person who stops and makes sure people are okay when he notices they’re upset.

sometimes impulsive. sometimes very restless, imo. bouncy boy. 

like w jeremy - you can absolutely send me questions abt michael (or anyone tbh!) and i’ll answer them the best i can! im by no means an expert but ive got pals i can bother in order to help get a solid answer :3

christine

chriiistiiiiiiiiine, the love of my life. a gal w ADD! please don’t forget that! i personally hc that she got into a theatre as a way of like… sort of getting energy out since she’s fairly restless??? track girl christine….. also good

loves herself a lot tbh! like. in the show, its canon that she has stuff to figure out but i personally think christine loves herself and her body and is proud of who she is?

very friendly, very open, very passionate abt theatre! these are basic facts lmao

very sweet! very smart! she’s like... The Girl in all the movies that everyones like “oh no i love her” bc shes just a bubbly gal

writing christine is really hard to describe sometimes. like with all the characters, i write what feels right and sounds right to me and to others.

but like... to be honest, as long as you stay a bit happy and supportive and loving with christine - you’re on the right track.

jake

god - one of my favorite boys to write sometimes because there’s a lot to do with jake’s character

he’s the ultimate cool dude in high school. probably the kind of dude who would join a frat in college. handsome, popular, flirtatious - you fucking name it man.

sorta effortlessly popular and cool. there’s problems underneath - considering his family - but it’s hard to see that he has flaws when everything just comes so easily to him.

a very caring and sweet dude tbh. his friends mean a lot to him and he’s the kind of boy who carries your books and asks where you’re going and how you’re doing

he makes mistakes. he gets aggressive and protective and just angry physically - he did try to attack jeremy, albeit drunk, based purely on the idea that jeremy was having sex w chloe - so like... that’s a good thing to acknowledge

i said hes flirtatious and he is - without realizing it. someone probably has called him out on it and he’s like “sorry what?” bc he was caught up in talking to someone and not realizing that the dillinger charm never went off. because it never goes off. rip.

rich

GOD, my FAVORITE BOY, the LOVE OF MY LIFE, i love him.

squipped: aggressive. a bully. stinky. 0/10.

post-squipcident: getting better. sorta numb at first before happy, outgoing rich resurfaces because He’s Fine! Do Not Worry! but y’know like... he definitely has a lot of problems with what he did and who he was while he had the squip

a bit sensitive imo. easily upset on certain topics, easily angered on others. really misses his mom (i hc she died and his dad took up drinking as a coping mechanism and its mainly rich and his older brother relying on each other but thats just me tbh.)

rich is tricky to write when it comes to his home life. while i see rich’s dad as being a loud drunk, others see him as being physically abusive and so forth and - okay, that’s your decision, but please make sure you’re being respectful and you post trigger warnings because some people are in abusive homes and it’s not a fun thing to read. 

great sense of humor imo. flirtatious but in the more obvious “haha hey lets bone ;)” way. alternatively: flirtatious with squip, floundering a bit without it because all he knows is “haha hey wanna fuck” 

would probably fight a dick for his pals. rly just loves his friends even if he doesn’t show it.

chloe

chloe is a bit hard to write without saying “shes kind of a bitch” but like... she is and she knows it and she fucking owns it.

casting call: “ confident, crass, sexy, manipulative, and downright mean at times”

so like. she’s nowhere near bein a sweet angel baby uwu

has problems. explore them. she literally was down to fuck brooke’s boyfriend since jeremy was dating brooke yknow. part of it could be alcohol but like... dont ignore that fact. like. she probs needs to talk to both brooke and jeremy.

i think of chloe as someone who can see the potential in others tbh. gets slightly annoyed when people arent achieving what they could - but i like to imagine she gets it after a while since some ppl dont have confidence and such. 

yknow the kind of people that take charge when the situation calls for it? that’s chloe. she’s very much a leader. cunning, ambitious - she’s fucking ready.

brooke

more of an angel i guess? sweet, a bit insecure, and a little more caring. not very dominant in situations - tends to be more of a follower (as shown w her and chloe’s friendship)

very caring actually. she literally followed jeremy out and said “uhhh he was kind of a dick to women but i know u like eminem” upon his death in the show??? like??? she literally went to check on this boy.

imo she sorta needs to learn to be bolder. to not take shit. shes probably the kind of person who says yes to a lot of things even if they’re conflicting bc she doesn’t want to like... bother someone and make things worse

emotional, imo. fairly feminine.

its hard to keep describing sdfkjhds sorry

jenna

not popular. remember that she wanted people to be interested in her, which is why she gossips a lot

probably tends to overhear half of the gossip. other than that, i can see her easily finding shit out bc she has eyes Everywhere

bold, fairly extroverted, probably really fucking smart tbh. give her love. she deserves it.

thats both at me and everyone else. jenna rolan ily...

very much a big sister figure, post-squipcident. theres this kdrama i was watching where the main protag lives w a couple other girls and one of the oldest one of the bunch is very much a big sister figure that will call other people out on their bullshit because she knows protag isnt the kind of person to do that? thats jenna. and chloe, but mostly jenna.

probably the kind of person who wants to be helpful imo. she likes feeling useful.

[jeongincore]

Shit i really liked and kinda didn’t like about Ragnarok

I recently saw ragnarok and became so rejuvenated that i brought my marvel blog back but i wanted to seriously talk about like things that i liked and really didn’t just to get shit out there. 

Things i really liked (like so much that i am obsessed)

-Thor’s new hair cut/outfit, i think its actually super suitable. Gives that sort of cool ass warrior refugee look. Plus, Chris Hemsworth is beautiful. 

-The humor, oh god it was hilarious, i’ve never laughed so genuinely and so much in my life and it made the movie so charming and relatable. It was also such a departure from The Dark World and the first Thor, which dealt with so much emotional baggage for not only just Thor, but for Loki, who basically suffered throughout both movies. 

-Hulk being an actual toddler/Bruce Banner being so fucked up and anxious because WHEN DID HE GET ON AN ALIEN PLANET. 

-”You’ve been on other planets before i assume” “Yeah, one!” “well now it’s two” 

-Valkyrie. Her entire everything gave me so much to love and adore. Tessa Thompson has stole my heart yet again. 

-TAIKA WAITITI AS KORG WAS ACTUALLY SO FUNNY

-The little tiny glimpses of Loki and Thor’s childhood, aka the snake story, get help. It really showed how much time Loki and Thor had spent together, which i assume is a lot because age in Asgardian years work differently probably? Like imagine that, Loki and Thor spending time together and being inseparable for 100 years. It showed that they were always close despite loki feeling different or alienated, which explains why its so hard for Loki to just leave thor for dead. 

-”You’ll always be the god of mischief, but you can be so much more” See that shit destroyed me. Thor acknowledges that Loki is not like him. He’s a trickster, manipulative, and selfish. But he also acknowledges that Loki is so much more than his tricks and lies, which shows so much character growth in Thor, who sees loki as more than just an asgardian prince that was raised the exact same way opposite of Thor, but as his own fucking person.

-Thor actually not being stupid and falling for Loki’s tricks, aka his magic projections of himself/his petty, stupid betrayals. Tom mentioned that Thor was evolving and that Loki was finally starting to realize that he’s the only one not growing. Scenes like the betrayal scene and the snake scene, although meant to be hilarious, point out that Thor isn’t that idiot that just was too trusting of his brother, he sees through Loki’s tricks, he’s seen them for years, and it really shows that Loki’s getting predictable with his fake deaths and betrayals, which might hint at him changing? 

-IT FIXED THE INCONSISTENCIES. The main reason i didn’t like Dark world, though i did see it as amazing for its ability to mix the emotional darkness between Loki and Thor along with the humor throughout the movie, was because it pointed Loki out to be the type of cold blooded monster that would murder his own father. I mean I’m no Loki apologist, i love the kid but he’s killed, he’s manipulated, he’s hurt everyone around him, but i doubt he could ever kill Odin, no matter how much of a shitty father he is. Also low-key hated the whole “Loki if you betray me, ill kill you” Thor bullshit. We all know thor wouldn’t be able to do that, he still hopes Loki is his brother. 

-AGAIN, THE SNAKE SCENE WAS SO FUNNY. 

-”I thought the world of you Loki.” Ouch. 

-Hulk and Val’s bromance. 

-The entire Valkyrie v. Hela scene. It was so beautiful and ethereal i actually nutted. 

-LOKI DIDN’T NEED TO COME BACK. HE DIDN’T NEED TO GO BACK TO THE SHIP WITH THOR. HE DIDN’T NEED TO GO BACK TO ASGARD. HE COULD HAVE NOT. BUT HE DID. BECAUSE SOMEWHERE IN THERE UNDER THE SELFISHNESS MAYBE HE CARES.

-Loki’s face when odin called him his son. 

-Loki’s face when Hela told him to kneel. 

-Loki refusing to let Thor go back to Asgard. “Are you serious? you can’t be thinking of going back there, that’s madness!” is that? Loki cARING? 

-Loki’s character development. 

-thor in a jean jacket and hoodie in new york. 

-Thor spilling beer everywhere. 

-Loki letting Thor take the orgy ship. 

-Jeff Goldblum. Thats it. 

-LOKIS FACE WITH THOR AND ODIN ON THE ROOF OF THE CASTLE I SCREmed AFTER ALL LOKI DID HE WAS STILL PUT THERE AS A PRINCE OF ASGARD BYE.  

-”Hello father” “OH SHIT” 

-The entire play. Loki’s rule as a benevolent god/king in which, before everyone feared him for a dictatorship militaristic form of ruling he could have, but in reality he just like ate grapes and watched plays. 

-Thor wanting to be a Valkyrie. The crowned prince of asgard, wanting to be an elite team of woman warriors. 

-VAL IS GAY AND IN TESSA THOMPSONS WORDS, HAD A GIRLFRIEND THAT SACRIFICED HERSELF TO SAVE HER. 

-Val kicking Loki’s ass. 

-THE RETURN OF THE DOUBLE BLADES OUT OF NOWHERE. 

-Loki in a suit. 

-HEIMDALL I LOVEJWIFHTGE.

-”I thought you didn’t want to talk about it” “heres the thing” 

-”Hello!” “Hi” *blasts everyone in room with giant laser guns* 

-”What are you? Thor, god of hammers?” 

-IMMIGRANT SONG. 

-”i swear i left him right here” “where? on the street? Or in that nursing home thats being torn down?” 

“I’m not a witch” “Why do you dress like one then?” 

-Loki rolling his eyes when thor is approached by fans. 

-Loki calling stephen strange a shitty sorcerer and going at him with stabby hands. 

-Confirmation of loki’s love of stabbing. 

-Confirmation that Loki is a snake, and also Thor’s favorite snake.

-Loki reciting Thor’s prayer to odin with him mY SON. 

-The avengers parallel. “He’s my brother!” “adopted.” 

-”mbLERG ITS ME” 

-”AGH LOKI!” 

-’DIRECT ME TO WHO’S ASS I HAVE TO KICK” 

-”Where? the devil’s anus?” 

-Bruce fighting evil with fireworks. Good job sweetie. 

-Bruce flopping like a fish on the bifrost. 

-Thor and his sparkles. 

-Lightning eyes. 

-Odin finALLY DYING. THANK GOD. 

-*Loki on a death trip* ‘this is a terrible idea” 

-Loki somehow reciting a spell to bring surtur back. what a weirdo. how did he know that. 

-LOKI COMING BACK. 

-im here. 

-Loki

-Brodinson. 

-Thor and Bruce’s bromance. 

-Jane not being there. I mean it makes sense she dumped him, he left her for two years chasing down infinity stones and constantly almost dying while she had no way of contacting him because Thor’s ass didn’t know how to use fucking email. Also i just really honestly never liked her character to begin with, i mean sure i love that Jane is a strong, smart woman but tbh i just wanted to Fast forward every time she was on screen. 

-The cute death wolf. 

-”THATS HOW IT FEELS!” “sorry i just really like the sport” 

-THOR ACTUALLY BEING PORTRAYED AS LESS OF A JERK WITH CACTUSES SHOVED UP HIS RECTUM AND MORE LIKE THE SWEET, CHARMING, CHARISMATIC AND SLIGHTLY ARROGANT BUT MEANS WELL MAN HE IS. 

-Val being there as a cool as member of the team rather than just the love interest of Thor. Protect her at all cost even though she probs doesn’t even need it. 

-”I’VE BEEN FALLING FOR THIRTY MINUTES” 

-Stan Lee’s cameo as the dude who cut Thor’s hair. Thank you for doing all of us a giant favor. Please do the same to Loki. 

-loki beating someone up with his horn hat. 

-Loki twirling his horn hat. 

-Loki being such a self serving, extra asshole that he came from the fucking fog screaming “YOUR SAVIOR HAS ARRIVED” 

-Bruce asking where tony was and then complaining about his tight crotch pants. 

-LOKI’S COSTUME CHANGE GOD I HATED THE OLD ONES BLESS UP. 

-Loki’s costume being mainly blue, black, and gold :-)))))))

-Loki being 100% done with everything that happens. 

-Val knocking Loki out when he makes her relive her trauma why do people ship this you go honey that was a dick move

-Thor throwing various things at Loki to make sure he’s not a mirage. 

-he’s a friend from work, something a kid from make a wish that met chris suggested, being in the film and all of the trailers. I hope that made that kid smile. 

-”In return, i wish to be granted safe passage through the anus” 

-LOKI FINALLY ACCEPTING THAT HE DIDN’T WANT THE THRONE WITHOUT A FAMILY. THAT HE’D RATHER WATCH HIS BROTHER TAKE IT AND STILL HAVE A BROTHER THAN HAVE A THRONE WITH NO ONE TO SHARE IT WITH. 

-LOKI SHOWING UP ON SCREEN DURING THOR’S CORONATION. 

-Loki being genuinely worried about and double checking if Thor really wants to bring him back to earth after what he did kill me honestly that would probably hurt less. 

-Loki’s face when thor said that going their separate ways was what Loki always wanted bc in reality that is the opposite go back. 

-Hela not being Loki’s daughter because 1) it proves that ya’ll should stop hoping that a comic soap opera about rich petty alien boys with daddy issues would be anything like classic norse mythology, and 2) when the fuck and how the fuck and why the fuck 

-Loki suggesting that he and Thor both rule over Sakaar together lmao ouch. 

-Loki just being really cute and quirky. 

-Thor being so fucking amazed by Val all the time. 

-”You’re late.” 

-”I saw you coming” “course you did.” 

-THE GUNS NAMED DES AND TROY I WANTED TO FUCKING DIE. 

What i didn’t like much; 

-Hela. I loved her character, but honestly here is where i think there might’ve been some failure despite how much i loved that movie. She seemed so out of place as a villain, and i feel like the whole related shit tried to mimic Guardians vol. 2, but honestly the fact that Thor didn’t care much about her made her feel so out of place. But i did like some parts, like how she was so disappointed about not being remembered or what her existence and disappointment did to how loki was raised. 

-Dr. Strange? Ok that was weird. It makes sense and it was funny to see him but to be honest i wasn’t into it. 

-tHE SCENE WITH VAL AND A GIRL BEING CUT. WHYWHYWHY

-tbh was not fond of frost master, don’t hate me. 

-Loki possibly taking the tesseract????? And hinting that he might turn evil again??? don’t do this to me marvel. 

-loki possibly being turned into the quirky sidekick of his brother. Loki is Thor’s equal, not his annoying little brother/wacky sidekick. I didn’t get that vibe often, but sometimes i did honestly. 

-RIP thor’s hammer. 

-ODIN BEING A PIECE OF SHIT YET AGAIN. 

-Hela’s entrance. it was so quick and like out of place i was like what wait, Loki and thor didn’t even have time to prepare or even mourn. 

-the comedy. It was its best and worst part of the movie. Sometimes it was tasteful. Other times it was too much. Thor and Loki didn’t even get to mourn for their dad who tbh was an asshole but still their dad before there was a annoying joke about kneeling. It took away from the story sometimes.

-the lack of hugging between thor and loki.

-The way they glossed over the warriors three’s death like they weren’t Thor’s closest friends and the only ones there for him when Odin tried to banish Thor to earth :-))))) I mean after all that shit he went through I’m pretty fucking sure it probably hasn’t caught up to him but ya bitch still pissed. 

-The way, Thor, who basically admitted that Loki actually meant the world to him and was the only family he had left, didn’t ask where he was after asgard exploded? Like tbh i get it, he trusts Loki, his brothers capable and strong and most of all really fucking smart, but i’d still be like :-) the fuck is Loki. I think this is a directing error though rather than like the characters fucking up but i was freaking out, i mean asgard was literally pebbles and everyone was out BUT my son. 

-No sif, i mean i get it Jaime Alexander was busy but like y'all could’ve explained smh. 

-Loki not getting a hair cut. When will his emo phase end. 

-Not getting that one flashback to 80′s asgard with mullets and emo loki. 

Overall it was pretty fucking cool, one of the best movies of the trilogy. I fell in love with the marvel cinematic universe all over again. But it wasn’t perfect.