#i still kind of do lol
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I think it's really interesting how people try to say that Saiura is a much better ship than Saiteru...because their only reasoning is that "they're soulmates" yet we never got a full elaboration on what soulmates could define for Aiura.
And even then, Saiki and Aiura are not close, even aiura herself doesn't consider to be friends with Saiki and claims that "we end up being more like strangers" when talking about her and Saiki. They never talk, and all Aiura does is try to corner him every time, to which Saiki is uncomfortable with and annoyed by reasonably too.

Aiura has a very wrong and flawed perspective on who Saiki really is. She literally assumes he's some sadistic guy playing hard to get.. or whatever her words were, she thinks that he would enjoy sexual things (he would not 😭) because all she's doing is that she's projecting on to him. Lied about her and Saiki dating and doing..... things to which made Saiki uncomfortable and awkward visibly. Idek what to call this.

Did not want mention this either but in the manga, she tried to SA saiki, with some so called "lucky feel moment" (when two people get into a inherently sexual situation, one knowing and one not knowing of this.) That's literally weird AF.

Anyways....
She has no idea or concept on who Saiki is. It's so far off from him that it's an entirely new person. Not to mention, she does not like Saiki at all romantically, though. The only thing that has her invested with him is that he might be "Sadistic", oh Aiura... 😭...

It proves further on that she has never had feelings romantically at all and still does not, she is only "fascinated " with this idea of Saiki.
We also need to talk about how uncomfortable saiki is from aiura by a lot. She doesn't respect his boundaries at all, thinks knowing his secret is something she owns

(I'm pretty sure her and Toritsuka also thought this, which is odd because what?)
and tries to use to her advantage, tried to make saiki do some weird favor (obviously inappropriate implications to which Saiki said no to immediately before she could add anything).

Yikes..
and is very selfish and pushy about saiki 😭 yet she calls saiki selfish?

this is what I'm talking about. She still doesn't understand saiki and still has a five hundred million perspective on who saiki is. That shouldn't be good in a relationship.
Ship them all you want, but the chemistry is absolutely nowhere
Although yes, they have some good moments, I can not see this going further romantically. Friendship, yes, anything else, NO!
Underrated opinion, but Saiki x Mera is better than this ship. I'm just saying.... I think Mera and Saiki are very cute and wished for more interactions with them. Obviously, Saiteru is much better than this as well from Teruhashi's side.
Must've been the wind...
This isn't supposed to be hate, this is just what I gathered from one of the bad aspects of their relationship. I wish they were much closer and that Aiura didn't do.. that 😭
#saiki no psi nan#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#analysis#kind of#essay#saiura rant#aiura mikoto#mikoto aiura#saiki kusuo#kusuo saiki#aiura saiki k#rant post#terusai#mention#saiki kusuo no ψ nan#saiki kusuo no psi nan#saiura#sorry to tag it but im just stating the canon aspect of the ship 😢#trust i absolutely love reblogging saiura stuff its just canon saiuras chemistry is acc saddening#in fact i used to ship saiura#i still kind of do lol
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Bridge to turnabout doodles
#EDGEWORTH WITH THE CRANE FOLDING IS SO FUNNY AND SO CUTE LOL#and hearing characters react to his glare + his own monologue about it is peak#I wanna revisit the first case after I finish this now that I now abt Diego Armando#I think that whole debacle had to do with dahlia also poisoning him but since I didn’t know much abt him at the time I wanna see again#iris and pearl have similar glaring(?) faces and its really cute#when I went to visit iris again in the detention centre after poking around the temple i was startled when gumshoe followed me LOL#I guess hes kind of like my substitute for maya???#and they voiced edgeworths take that line when I had to use the Magatama thats so neat!!!!#I squinted and they did the same thing for the dialogue button and talk screens- his silhouette is where phoenix’s would be#I thought that was a really nice subtle touch#doodles#my art#myart#ace attorney#aa#trials and tribulations#bridge to turnabout#im still really early in the case though#mia fey#iris fey#diego armando#dick gumshoe#miles edgeworth#phoenix wright
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Company Mandated Fancy Fits on the Tulpar 😏
Also had to include the REAL star of the show (and a bonus)


Based off of this and this. Thank you very much joetastic for being inspirational 👍
The REAL reason this is late

#just pretend I posted this like 6 days ago 😁👍#<-got distracted#sorry I’m Afflicted with The Curse and everything just takes me a long time#also right now I’m just kind of being experimental with my workflow and style right now so stuff is just naturally taking a bit longer#mouthwashing#mouthwashing fanart#anya mouthwashing#mouthwashing anya#nurse anya#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#mouthwashing curly#swansea mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#myart#anyway my new years resolution is to put more WOMEN in SUITS and MEN in DRESSES#had fun drawing this but still not too sure about the rendering style just yet. probably just gonna keep playing around with shit#IM DOING IT SCARED but im DOING IT#im also still trying to figure out how to Social Media#am i doing it right#GRAAAHHHHHHH I NEED TO BETTER UNDERSTAND FORMATTING POSTS#i have a more serious mouthwashing piece in the works but wanted to get this done first lol#honestly I have a buncha sketches I should post too#i like them but they’re not really composited very well if you catch my drift. been having trouble with sketch page layout recently#which is kind of antithetical to the idea of a sketch page but you know how it is with spaghetti#i doodled the others on the side and liked how they looked so i just put some color and basic shading on them#edit: realized i forgot to change the color of the ‘lapel’ on jims shirt lol
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friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me
#It’s just so different#even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol#in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps#if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it#esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends#no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr#u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS#meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life#this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation#like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !!#& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers#who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them#and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends#it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me#I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc#like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this#so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works#p
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class swap design masterpost for convenience (from top to bottom: bard!riz, cleric!gorgug, sorcerer!kristen, barbarian!fig, artificer!adaine, and rogue!fabian)
#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhfy#fhsy#fhjy#riz gukgak#gorgug thistlespring#kristen applebees#figueroth faeth#adaine abernant#fabian seacaster#my class swap stuff! oh yeah I think I got a tag for that I'll call that#fh class quangle#gna slowly go back and get that tag on relevant posts too. for organization's sake#even tho I didnt really intend this blog to be that kinda blog lmao. we were all just gonna be out here dealin with that at our own pace#anyways uh! they! u know all the lore for the designs already I put em in tags. but otherwise this also collects like the#color keys kind of for these. mostly the things that change between designs#doing this did make me realise half of these are a Lot more consistent in color keys than the other half lol#like kristen's palette stays pretty much the same. and fabian's. the hit's mostly in the construction#a lot of this is overall like an exercise in remembering what high schoolers would actually wear and how to work in Costume pieces#on this point at least I straight up have No relevant recollection lmao all the basic education establishments I went to have uniforms#and outside of school I was. well kind of a shorts and tee guy. so#on that topic I feel like fabian's is the furthest stretch lmao. like if a guy in high school wears the same bright yellow raincoat#to school every day that's like. people would Not like that guy. fabian really is saved by being cute and a rogue#he will still have stans when he's deep in his fishing arc in junior year he's the manic pixie dream bf#anyways uh. things to do! stuff to get done. sleep first tho. have a good night lads#I have not caught new nsbu yet! seems I mostly catch them like two to three days late nowadays.#so please uhh. don't reply on my posts with nsbu spoilers? we are all excited and having fun but that's rude#ok thank u. signing off for the day have a good night#!!
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sketches of ark's werewolf form except based on the designs of some other funny dogs i like
#OC#ark#werewolf#i have not known a moments peace in the last several weeks so i sketched these for myself to stave off insanity#i also started sketching a bloodborne one but it felt too similar to the varcolac so#maybe i will finish that sketch later if i do more of these#i find the van helsing design kind of basic in general but i would be lying if i said it wasnt hot as hell#my favorite dogs are the ones where its clearly a human face pushed out into a snout. so the nose is still human#that's gascoignes lasting legacy. my beloved#i think in terms of tv/film werewolves the being human one is leagues above most other designs ive seen also. i luv u rat dogs#sketches#posted at 2am for your convenience lol
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forever obsessed with dynamics between vampires, specifically that of a maker and fledgling, as a way to explore abuse. the creation of a vampire itself can so easily be a literalization of the lasting impacts of trauma and also much more simply the ways a perpetrator might shape their victim’s very identity. the extremes of isolation in the way that the new vampire, in most narratives, must cut all ties to their mortal life, or else go through an elaborate charade to maintain the facade of humanity, while forever still being removed from it. and the sheer dependence and vulnerability of being in an entirely new state of being, wholly uncertain of what it entails, and relying on another person to define… everything.
#or just the moral dilemmas#rewatching amc interview is kind of making me insane#that moment in episode two when louis is looking for a sort of assurance in the fact that lestat may actually have some good in him#look at how he cares about music look at the simple wondrous things that can bring him joy#and then the immediate dread when the opera performance turns out to be imperfect because he knows how lestat will react to *that*#I think there’s also something really interesting in the highlighting of lestat upbraids the less skilled singer before killing him#(slowly)#but also I will wait to watch more before I articulate my thoughts#vampires#interview with the vampire#amc interview with the vampire#I do still find the lestat and claudia film and novel dynamic by far the most compelling for how she tries to usurp him but almost to be him#but I’m enjoying this#I’m very curious if I will like show claudia more on rewatch#the movie always resonated most with me (sue me lol) because there seemed to be more simultaneous fondness and attachment even at the end#dark stories of the north
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How to Archive VODs and Clips
Whether you want to download VODs and/or clips for your own records or because you’d like to share them online, knowing how to archive things is handy, especially when so many streams become lost media once they’re deleted off Twitch and/or YouTube.
Here are a few programs that I use for Royal Archivist!
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Of all the programs on this list, my personal favorites / the ones I most strongly recommend are Cobalt and Twitch Downloader! (When all else fails, OBS is also a good backup).
Cobalt
Cobalt has gained a lot of popularity the past few months, and for good reason! It's a very reliable, extremely user-friendly website that lets you save videos in MP4 formats, convert them into MP3 formats, or video-only without sound.
Cobalt is currently compatible with: BlueSky, Dailymotion, Facebook, Instagram, Loom, OK, Pinterest, Reddit, RuTube, SnapChat, SoundCloud, Streamable, TikTok, Tumblr, Twitch, Twitter, Vimeo, VK, Xiohongshu, and YouTube.
Twitch’s built-in download feature
If you’re downloading your own clip, this is the easiest method to use
First, navigate to your clips page.
To do this, click on your Twitch icon and go to “Creator Dashboard.” There will be a row of icons on your left - click the fifth button from the top (the one above the settings icon) and click on the link that says “Clips.”
At the top of the page, click on “Clips I’ve Created” and you should see a list of every clip you’ve ever made (regardless of whether or not you’ve published them, the clips are there!)
If you're having trouble, you can also type: https://dashboard.twitch.tv/u/ YOUR USERNAME HERE /clips/created
Click on the share button, and the list shown in the photo below will pop up.
After you click on the “Download” button (for landscape or portrait), a new tab will open up with the clip (which will autoplay, so heads up if you have your volume turned up high!)
Right click on the video and click “Save Video As”
That’s all there is to it! Please keep in mind that Twitch’s download function only works for clips you’ve made! You cannot use it to download VODs, or other people’s clips.
Twitch Downloader
Twitch Downloader is by far the BEST Twitch download program I have ever used. I’ve used several different ones, some which have broken because of Twitch’s updates, others which have fallen into disrepair because their creator no longer updates the program, but this one has been working consistently for me for a little over a year now. I’ve kept it very close to my chest because I’m terrified it’ll stop working one day, but it’s better to share resources than horde them out of fear.
Pros:
HD quality for all downloads! Whatever quality the stream was, that’s the quality the download will be (unless you adjust anything in the settings).
The best feature of this program is you can adjust how much you want to clip! Only want a 30 second clip from a 6 hour VOD? You can specify the section you want to download so long as you know the timestamps where you want the clip to start and where you want it to end.
You can download entire VODs.
When saving the file, it will automatically enter the original name of the stream and the stream date. (You can change this, but it’s very handy when you’re downloading an entire VOD and not a section of one).
It will automatically prompt you to update it when a new version has been released. (You do have the option to opt out of this, if you want).
There are a lot of other features available, however, I’ve never tried any of them so I can’t say how well they work. The Github page has a lot of examples and a Q&A section though, so check that out if you’re curious!
On the rare occasion that the program encounters issues, it's easy to use a past version, and the creators are quick to release new updates that resolve any problems. As of today (February 21, 2025) the latest version is currently 1.55.2, which updated last week.
Cons:
Sometimes when you click “Get Info” it won’t immediately load the VOD. This is pretty easy to solve by just restarting the program, so it’s not a huge issue imo.
You can’t preview clips before you download them, so you need to know the exact timestamps you want.
You can’t download VODs that are privated or no longer on Twitch.
How to use:
Download Twitch Downloader from Github and install the version that works for your computer. (In this case, I would download the GUI Windows-x64.zip version. Make sure you’re downloading the GUI version if you want a user-friendly version of this program).
Enter the URL of the VOD you’d like to download.
You can adjust the quality of the video and the length. If nothing is specified in the “Crop Video” section, it will download the entire VOD.
Once you’re ready, click the “Download” button and you’re good to go!
Open Video Downloader
If you’ve ever wanted to download any kind of video, I’m sure you’ve heard of Youtube-dl. There are different versions of this program, but some of them are a bit finicky and if things stop working, it can be difficult and frustrating trying to figure out what went wrong and how to fix it — which is why I recommend this program.
Open Video Downloader, aka youtube-dl-gui, is one of the best video downloaders I’ve ever used. It’s basically Youtube-dl with a Graphical User Interface (GUI) that makes the program very easy for anyone to use.
Pros:
No coding knowledge required! VERY user-friendly.
The creator fixes user issues very quickly! Whenever the program experiences a problem, a new update is released within 24 hours.
It can download videos from pretty much all major social media platforms, including Youtube, Twitter, Tumblr, Twitch clips, Instagram, and more.
Cons:
You can’t adjust the length of what you want to download. If you want to download a 2 minute section from a 5 hour Youtube VOD, you’ll have to download the entire video.
On rare occasions, I’ve had issues where it cannot download an unlisted Youtube video. There are sometimes ways to get around this, but it’s a pain and usually not worth the effort.
How to use it:
Download the latest version of the program from GitHub. Scroll all the way down to “Assets” and select the version that’s right for your computer. (For example, I use Windows, so I would download the .exe file).
Once you’ve installed it, you can start downloading things! For this example, let’s say I want to download Quackity’s “Welcome to the QSMP” video. All I need to do is copy the link and paste it into the white box at the top of the program.
Once that’s done, you should see the video pop up in your download queue. You can queue multiple videos to download at once (you can also download entire playlists too). When you’re ready, click the green download button on the bottom right (as shown in the picture below) or if you only want to download one specific video from your queue, click the download button (circled in red) next to the video.
You can adjust the quality of the video you want to download, and in theory you can choose whether to download just the audio or just the video of a video, but personally that’s never worked for me. That might just be a me issue though.
If you’d like to change where your videos are saved to, click the Folder button (circled in yellow) and choose a download destination. If nothing is chosen, it will default to your Downloads folder.
There are ways you can customize this program, but like I said earlier, this program is very very easy to use and does not require any tinkering whatsoever. You open it, download what you want, then close it. Nice and simple!
Other Recommendations
OBS is a good backup when all else fails! I have to use OBS pretty frequently for YouTube VODs, since there aren't a lot of tools that let you clip parts of a YouTube video (and I'd rather not download an entire 7 hour long VOD for a 30 second clip). There are already a lot of good tutorials out there explaining how to use OBS, so I recommend poking around and seeing what works best for you. If you're new to video downloading / archiving things, I'd still recommend starting with some of the tools I mentioned above first.
I’d recommend making a folder on your computer for clips. I find it very helpful to name all my files with this method: [Stream date] Streamer name - Something that helps me remember what this clip is about / something that will help me find it later, or a quote.
Example: [2-6-24] Mike - I hate capitalism
If you’ve got a significant amount of clips on your computer, I’d recommend backing them up and/or saving them to an external harddrive!
That’s about it! I apologize if I’ve missed any steps, but hopefully everything is more or less easy enough for folks to understand! I’m someone who does not like downloading random programs onto my computer and I’m very paranoid about cyber security, but I’ve used these programs for over a year now, and they’re very reliable and trustworthy. 10/10, I recommend both of them.
Lastly: if anyone has a recommendation for good Youtube clip downloaders, please let me know! I haven’t found any good programs that let me specify how much of a Youtube video I’d like to download, and I am suffering. Help your friendly neighborhood Archivist so I can share more clips from the early days of QSMP.
#Twitch#Resources#FAQ#This post is brought to you by me teaching my coworker about Cobalt today#Coworker: Wow this is amazing! How did you learn all this stuff?#Me: I edit a lot of goofy gay cubito clips ∠( ᐛ 」∠)_#I didn't tell her that but I'm pretty honest about my fandom hobbies when people ask me directly lol#I've put so many sideblog shenanigan things on my resume#I ran a character design blog for like... 5 - 7 years or so?#and I still have stuff from that in my portfolio#Literally any ''silly'' fandom thing you do can be used for your resume#You just need to know how to phrase it#It was very funny when one of my past bosses looked me dead in the eye and said ''You're kind of a nerd aren't you?''#It made me laugh#I'm more of a geek than a nerd but I wear both titles proudly#Anyways that's your RA fun fact of the day#I've posted this before (as an addition to one of Bell's posts) but that one's a tiny bit out of date now#So here's a (slightly) more updated version
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To be reborn, you have to die first.
#Show Us Your Sims#The Sims 4#Sims 4#TS4#Sims 4 Edit#TS4 Edit#📷 Edits ๋࣭ ⭑ ˙#Queue: Moonrise ☾⋆⁺#intramoon#BS: Amelia Pease#It's not perfect but I've wanted to do a water#edit like this for a while I haven't been able to figure#it out#until now! (sorta)#Kind of wish a different pose#but alas lol#ALSO#new story post tomorrow!#It's small#but its still something#Amelia is in it which is why you're getting so many posts with#her#kinda what I plan to do for all story posts#is do edits and lookbooks to kind of#introduce you to the characters in the next part
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So does anybody else ever think about how Loop felt the need to demonstrate that the party's deaths wouldn't have any effect on the loops. I know I do but that's besides the point. Anyway I don't think Loop actually needs to bathe, they just like to feel included.
#'but lucabyte didnt you already do a comic with this exact same message? that loop has potentially killed their party intentionally before?'#yes i did absolutely do that thank you for noticing. that is what the cannibalism comic is about. no that was not a metaphor. lol#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#sifloop#isat siffrin#isat loop#in stars and time fanart#isat fanart#lucabyteart#ill ramble elsewhere some other time. maybe in a text post. but. long and short of it: even if you assume the answer to 'how do they know'#is that in sasasap isa got frozen once. theres still the fact that the loops are from sif being too distressed. how far gone does a siffrin#have to be before they can witness a party member die and notice it has no effect. how does loop feel to have planned to kill the party#during act 3. why did they NEED to show sif that. are they trying to preemtively stop them from getting the idea in their head#that maybe that might work? when they're out of all other options? when they just get so frustrated and at wits end?#loop helps in subtle ways through the whole game. and in less subtle ways like begging sif not to use the dagger. and while yes the#overarching reason you need to learn that the loops are tied to sif is because you need to figure out wish craft.... loop doesn't know the#actual mechanics of the loops themselves. just what didn't work. the power of friendship. getting the final hit in. being perfect. etc...#and besides all that.. how did loop feel during that hangout. being so deceitful. especially since before the other shoe drops#sif is enjoying themselves. but they know what's coming the whole time.#as for: why bathing? its the obvious imagery for blood on their hands/washing/never being clean. and is a bit of an inversion of the other#piece i just drew with the other casual closeness and nudity being kind. this one is cruel instead.#anyway tag ramble over ill do a masterpost of all my fanwork with some directors commentary sometime i promise. since i know im often vague
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junimo sight
#stardew valley#stardew valley spoilers#sdv#sdv spoilers#grandpa#mister qi#mr. qi#…im still thinking abt these two#ive decided qi has a ton of silly nicknames for the farmer’s grandpa since. we dont know his actual name lol#like qi presumably knows his name but we dont. so he calls him stuff like ‘hotshot’ and ‘cowboy’ and ‘mustang’#stuff that is like way cooler than you would expect. the gangly beardy farmer to be called#but qi thinks he’s cool so he calls him cool names. and because he can’t not flirt with him#and anyway. yeah i feel like peepaw could see junimos just like the farmer. maybe it runs in the family#my other stance is that qi in game can see junimos just fine but he couldnt always see them. that came with the immortality thing lol#and either way junimos are kind of deterred by him. they do not like his capitalist aura it freaks them out
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i've been thinking about exactly why people portraying one of the other crew members successfully killing Jimmy as a "for what you did to Anya" kind of thing rubs me the wrong way a bit and it's because like..... this is just another form of taking agency away from Anya, in a way. it's kind of framing her as some meek, shivery woman-thing who's entirely at the mercy of the men around her, either to hurt her or save her.
(i understand these are mostly for wish fulfillment on the audience's behalf because everyone would like to see Jimmy pay for his crimes. whether or not this is the intention of the person writing it isn't really relevant, characterization happens with or without intent. i feel like it misses the point by portraying it as an 'ideal ending'.)
because... Anya is a capable person. she takes things into her own hands when she can. it was partially(?) her idea to get into the cargo,
(before he interrupts her.. remember when she interrupted Curly in the dead pixel segment?)
it was her idea to get the code scanner from the cockpit,
it was her idea to get the medication from behind the foam.
(the chance to do these things herself is not given to her.)
she'd been keeping Curly alive for months in a critical state somehow, her psych evaluations at the start are only so useless because Jimmy refuses to take it/her seriously and Curly is obviously biased when he puts it into his own hands. he's known him a long time, like he said. "I'll just put good for that one."
there's not a lot of material to work with because of how the game is framed, but it's there. we are working with two very biased perspectives and neither one lends Anya what she deserves
there's significant changes in how she speaks post- and pre- crash, and depending on who she happens to be talking to. i recommend re-reading her dialogue, because the difference is drastic
she acts the way she does around Jimmy because he has tangibly done horrible things to her, is actively hostile, and physically could not escape him by any means. she can't take away Curly's agency herself, in my eyes. you have to remember that Especially in the post-crash segments of the game, it's entirely from Jimmy's POV, and he obviously does not (and has never) thought very highly of her or treated her with a shred of respect
i've seen a general idea that she can't bear to hurt other people for any reason, but that doesn't really track to me. this is the real point of the post by the way
it seems based on the parts where she says she struggles to give Curly medication. "It just hurts him so much, I can't stand the noise." "It makes me nauseous."
it's not really the same thing as, say, hurting someone in self defense
this sounds like she did want the gun itself. this never felt worded like someone who would refuse to, at very least, threaten Jimmy with a gun, with violence. if she had been given the agency to make that decision on her own. she wasn't though
she still tries to reclaim some of it even as she's denied it
by the end she's still trying to keep that gun out of his hands
i think some people overly soften her, for similar reasons the game itself is trying to comment on. she's not a tender victim who couldn't cause pain to another out of the softness of her soul, she's a person who's had every last bit of agency ripped from her repeatedly until she couldn't take it anymore. that's the point. that's why framing her that way, "needing" someone to save her, is odd to me
she didn't need Curly to save her, she needed him to take responsibility
she didn't want to escalate things, but she's not an idiot. self defense was absolutely on her mind
but who knows im just saying shit *smiles serenely*
#dib noise#mouthwashing#sorryyyyyyyyy lol#i will defend you anya o7#its been fun to roll this game around in my brain. gives me something to do#long post#could be reaching though. it's unfortunate so much of her screentime is hammering home how poorly jimmy regards her#or her being scared/nervous in his presence#or trying to placate him#yes i know that's the point#are my feelings on how anya is treated by the the characters the fans and the game itself weirdly personal? yeah sorry#unfortunately i do think they didn't get the anya parts as solidly as the rest but oh well#everything has flaws#i've gone through a playthrough of this game like 10 times for this#you KNOW im sourcing my claims!!#not really an attack on the people who made the stuff i mentioned at the start#more of a commentary on how they relate with the source material itself#yes yes i know giving a crewmate a lethal weapon is probably not the best idea to curly#does that make this situation any less horrifying?#remember: these aren't real people. everything they do was written on purpose for a reason#i still need to write down my general thoughts on the game as a whole..#also not about one specific person post image writing ect it's a collection of things and ideas thrown onto one post#I'm not any good at ending posts like thase it kind of devolves by yhe end but thats ok
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when you can literally change the weather but your stupid boyfriend wanted to use his umbrella
#guys i think they hold hands ...#saiki k#the disastrous life of saiki k#saiki fanart#saiki kusuo#toritsuka reita#kusuo saiki#reita toritsuka#torisai#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#erm i tried doing a silly overlay lmk if it looks corny lol#also ... chat what if i said i kind of accidentally wrote torisai fanfic ... idk if ill ever post it im not a writer im still thinking on it
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crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.
i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.
in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.
i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.
i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.
plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.
the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.
we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.
i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.
a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.
today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.
loved beyond thinking.
#spilled ink#writeblr#personal#please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it#i really try not to write so specifically about it#bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child#i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years#i might delete this. feels big.#the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum#and if u say ur autistic#inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms#please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do#and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort.#but it still feels like...#when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing.#they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly?#and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find#the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go)#and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW."#''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.''#and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic#someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.
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we let the ocean drown out our voices/enjoying the bitterness/in the chaotic light, I close my eyes and see
#dredge game#spoilers. technically lol#my friend mim (at mimzalot on twitch etc) streamed dredge at it went the FUnniest way it couldve#two streams in we made a joke abt the collector and the fisherman being in toxic old man yaoi#divorcee-on-widower situationship together. and the joke kept up Literally Until The Very End#iykyk#could not have stumbled into a better way to keep the surprise#and The Best Thing Is. I do still think the yaoi is meaningful to the text#like mim brought up how resurrection is inherently a selfish act. I sat on that for a While#but also I do just enjoy body double. abdication of responsibility through othering a specific part of yourself#pairing that with specifically Being A Villain as like. a deliberate act#u see my vision. u ever played dredge#anyways uhhh caption is from no party for cao dong's devotion#yes its bc red candle game's devotion is like a quarter of my personality but also I do listen to no party for cao dong recreationally#also been really feelin this kind of ink recently. U Will See. Soon Ish#seems I have like... phases of trying to figure out specific textures in ink#a long time ago I was Really into drawing metal with just ink. and a few years ago it was fire. and now: water#one day I'll get all five. and then I will be able to see the future#okay I either finish up a thing or go to bed now... depends. we shall see. take care and be kind to urself yeah? lets draw smthing tmr
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Huh
Interesting
I was watching Kengineer's 3rd solo playthrough episode last night when this quote from the Lotus popped up during the Once Awake quest, and it got me thinking about 1999.
1999 is when the Infestation pretty much shows up for the first time (at least as far as we know), which places the Radiation Wars after 1999 (of course).
...but how long after?
Now idk how old this Lotus quote is and whether it's in the devs' minds at all, but imagine that the Radiation Wars are directly after 1999, sparked by this recent apocolyptic infestation spreading all of a sudden.
Imagine the 1999 quest ends with nuclear armageddon, perhaps even on New Year's. We make that final New Year's kiss (or not), knowing that the people here are doomed to die (though they were probably doomed to die to the helminth strain inside them at some point anyways).
I imagine in this scenario that for the sake of replayable 1999 gameplay (and maybe even the opportunity to change romance routes) that this time fragment of 1999 we find ourselves in repeats indefinitely, always ending in the beginning of the Radiation Wars.
would be pretty funny i think
#not me just really really curious about these radiation wars since i first found out about them years ago lol#i kind of doubt they would actually do this but then again who knows#like imagine how baller of a move that would be#now i think we should still keep from experiencing the radiation wars in their entirety because that would ruin some of the magnitude of it#in this hypothetical timeline placement we would only see the very beginning of the radiation wars as we can imagine how it goes from there#ok brainworm thoughts over phew#warframe#warframe speculation#warframe lore#rambling
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