#i started it months ago tho so my art style had changed a bit and the first few secs are a bit janky

[your-unfriendlyghost]

How'd you end up discovering your art style?

Well, it wasn’t much of a discovery- it’s just how I draw, I guess! It evolves over time and changes based on what artists I’m looking up to and what styles I’m into

But I can give ya a (recent-ish) evolution of my style/a break-down on all its influences over the past two years if ya wanna see how it all happened!

-

Some stuff from July-October of 2022

Two-three-ish years ago, for instance, it was more classical painting inspired. I was real into Over the Garden Wall and also just…general American history back then don’t judge I was coming off of my first American history class since elementary school and I thought it was so cool So my art had more of like…that going on yk? It wasn’t as good as my stuff now at all, because I’ve since improved my anatomy skills, learned how to draw fabric folds (sorta), and learned a bit of color theory lol. But they’re ok for what they are, I guess.

I think my main problem back then was the fact that I did not fully know how to use references- and a lotta my references were like. Cartoons. And stuff that was very much not meant to be painted in the amount of detail I aimed for at the time.

(Even here, you can tell I was dissatisfied, because they all look pretty different from each other yk?) (and you can see how hardly any of the fabric has folds and how little I understood lighting 😭)

-

January-March ‘23

Anyhow, after this, in uhh early 2023, I had a 80s-90s comic book/pop art phase, which was a pretty drastic swing in the opposite direction. I still rendered things sometimes, but things were less soft/warm. BUT I was starting to use real photos as references which was vital

I was also watching a lotta tmnt with my kid brother, which is what I blame for why the proportions got so stylized- folks in the 2012 version of that show were just kinda built funny, which I think subconsciously impacted my art. My posing did get a bit stronger in this time as I practiced more, and I think things got less stiff

-

June-August ‘23

Next, as the summer months came, I had a lotta changes in inspo and also just in life lol. I had temporarily moved to my neighbor’s place, and I didn’t have a car yet/any friends who I liked enough to hang around with, so all summer long I rewatched a lotta 80s movies, fell in love with the first season of Stranger Things (not the others as much tho 😭), skateboarded, and watched a lotta art tutorials online. (I specifically remember Jackie Droujko’s yt shorts saving my assss- I loved her stuff so much. Definitely check ‘em out she explains things real well)

I improved slowly, but I DID IMPROVE a HELLUVA LOT. I focused a lot on trying to draw people who looked recognizably like themselves, but also stylized because realism (usually) bores me. I also got better at coloring- the first two here ain’t great in terms of colors, but I was learning. Plus, back then I was very into oddly saturated color schemes. (I mean it is a solid vibe. I may not do this a ton anymore but I can dig it still)

-

October-November ‘23

As autumn came, I was pretty enamored with all the like…✨fall vibes✨ that time around. My life was goin’ well, so I had a lotta optimism and a re-ignited love for nature, forests, and fantasy. Plus I was dating this girl who was really into vintage-y Wes Anderson stuff so I think some of that uhhh twee-ness rubbed off on me lol

My influences here were mainly old storybooks, a hint of Lord of the Rings (as you can probably tell by the hobbit), and a decent amount of Fantastic Mr. Fox. And for faces I was mainly using the Laurenillusrated Brushpack at the time I think? I don’t use the “Sketchy” brush in it as often anymore as I did then, but I should. It’s a great brush, and I actually am really liking all the little sketchy lines. It adds a nice touch.

also don’t look at my goddamn long hair in that self portrait on the left. I hated it on me then and I hate it now too. I cannot believe I ever let it get that long it was really bad

-

December ‘23-April ‘24

I honestly did like a total of like. Seven drawings in these four months. As opposed to my usual…uhhh I wanna say 25 every four months. Idk what was up- art just wasn’t fun at the time. I mean, it was also just a lousy few months in general, so I’m sure that’s a part of it lol, but yk. This style is pretty close to my current one- my inspiration just came from x-files-ish sci-fi and American gothic stories/images as opposed to nowadays’ Beat generation and greaser inspo.

May-Now (October) ‘24

The Outsiders kinda dragged me back into enjoying drawing again honestly. I’d read and loved it back in 2023, but upon rereading it/watching the movie in February of 2024, it just sorta…entered my headspace and stayed this time. (Still, I didn’t really draw any Outsiders/greaser-y things till May)

Lately, I take artistic inspiration in 2d animated films, like the ones by Disney with the real nicely drawn fabric folds. And also just a lotta inspo from real life. I also do a lot of black and white comics, because I find that I generally have a “Go big or go home” mentality about most things- which can be a LOT of pressure! By allowing myself to draw simpler doodle-y things, I’ve regained that love for drawing. I think for a while it just felt like work, but in letting myself take it easy, art’s become a good time again :))

[silvertsundere]

Silver Talks AniManga (16/06/24)

new serialization round baby let's gooooo there's nothing too fancy on it but I'm curious about the series that will start in 3 weeks since I read the author's previous manga years ago when it came out, until it got axed, so I wanna see how much they improved since then

green - new series/new to me blue - finale/completed

Anime

Dungeon Meshi Ep24 (Finale)

there really isn't anything else I could've given it. trigger absolutely killed it the whole way through and thank GOD someone convinced the shitflix execs to make this a weekly release instead of the shitty binge model which would've killed the show dead instantly.

but yeah, I haven't read the manga (yet) but I'd seen tons of spoilers before and even more during the show airing ( 😔 ) and it's an incredible adaptation. a lot of people complain about certain scenes not hitting as hard as in the manga for this reason or another but I feel like most (not all) of those complaints are just nitpicking and trying to give off a sense of superiority cause they read the manga beforehand

anyway, great animation the whole way through, like always above average and with a lot of sakuga sprinkled all throughout. we even got unorthodox animation like that one with the siblings or all the scenes made in the classic trigger style instead of this more "mainstream" look they used for the show everything else is stellar too, I loved the whole seiyuu cast and their performances and the music was great as well

also ryoko kui is an incredible author so it was just a treat to see all the thought that went into the world, dungeon and otherwise, tho I already knew that before the anime was even announced

anyway, TL;DR: incredible adaptation and what everyone should dream of getting for their series. can't WAIT for S2 coming TBA, surprised they announced it already cause they have a panel at AX next month so I figured they'd do it there

Manga

Youkai Buster Murakami Ch1

I went into this not expecting much since I read the author's previous work, shugomaru, which while not terrible was also nothing to write home about. I was pleasantly surprised by this tho, I actually liked it a lot more than shugomaru. I was doubtful at first cause "oh boy here comes another exorcist series" until I was told who the author was. as expected it's a comedy series like their previous work. the gimmick is that the main girl is an exorcist and it's her job to seal all these youkais that are being ressurected but she's a huge coward so she brings her, completely normal, friend along to help her and he defeats the youkai by poking holes into it's story like you can see in the pic below I can totally see this being a fun series that I wouldn't mind having stick around for a while if every chap is at least this good. even being a shorter debut of 30 pages it felt like it dragged a bit too long but it should be fine with normal lenght chaps. we'll see how it goes in the coming weeks

Dear Anemone Ch17 (Finale)

man where do I even start with this. first of, I'd thought about giving it a 2 instead of a 1 cause the art is really good but this final chap was so bad it made me change my mind. that spread I picked below is a compilation of stuff that never actually happened in the manga. I guess it was stuff the author had planned but it got axed so yeah. from chap 1 I said the art was good but way too gory for wsj and that stayed true the whole way, it was just way too much for the magazine it was in. impressive that the author managed to keep up the quality in a weekly serialization tho. that's all this manga had tho, the art. everything else was terrible. the story was confused and moving all over the place and the bad ratings made it even worse with the author trying to rush and give reveals and twists constantly which never felt satisfying cause there was no build up to it. the characters didn't felt like characters either and they were just getting pulled along the plot. I went into this not expecting much and still came out disappointed. author is gonna have to put a LOT of effort into their writting if they want do to another serialization or at least they should team up with someone else since again the art was actually really good

[darkdragon768]

My Top 5 of new games I've played in 2023!

1st Place: Mother 3 (GBA (Emulator))

Amazing story. I've never played a game that made me cry THAT hard. I had a lot of fun playing it. Battles are fun and not too easy nor too hard. Sure, I had to farm some exp at some point but it wasn't that awful (as other games I've played). The characters are lovely, all have their own backstory and baggage to carry. I've binge played through the whole Mother Series at once and was immensely positively surprised. Definitely a hidden gem I can recommend to anyone. Bonus points for becoming a hyperfixation. 5/5

2nd Place: Pikmin 4 (Switch)

A loooong while ago I started Pik3dx but never finished it. This year as they were announcing the fourth game I at first wasn't that interesting but somehow the switch clicked and I binge played through the whole series too. Being made very easily as every game (except Hey! but that seems like a game everyone pretends doesn't exist. It can't be that bad, can it?) is available on Switch now. Anyway, I really enjoyed it. Compared to the other games it was sadly a tad bit too easy for me (even tho I wasn't using some features they added that'd help you through it (rewinding time, calling Dingo for help)) but mostly the lovely characters and collecting all the treasures made it for me. Bonus points for becoming a hyperfixation. 4.5/5

3rd Place: WarioWare: Move It! (Switch)

I only own this game for like a month by now but boy do I and my mom have fun with this one! A really nice change to constant mario karting. It was my first WarioWare game so I was really impressed by the game having an amazing art style, animations and especially voice acting in so many languages! I'm loving all the different controller poses (except one perhaps...) and the microgames. All the different characters are so lovely and unique and special in their own way, they've already grown dear to me. Seeking out the other titles because I'm invested now. Bonus points for becoming a hyperfixation. 4.9/5

4th Place: Super Paper Mario (Wii)

It may not have got me gameplay wise because jumping on 2d enemies in a 3d world is kinda... shit, as an example, but the story made it for me. The third game that made me cry this year so of course I had to include it. The story was stretched quite long but it never felt rushed or boring or not important. So amazing storytelling here! I loved that a lot! 3.5/5

5th Place: Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga (Remake, 3DS)

My first M&L game and I, here too, was positively surprised by its amazingness. The game felt so warm because of their brotherly love, it got silly humor here and there, a neat battle system, some tough bosses but an enjoyable time all together. Looking out for more M&L games! 4.6/5

Honorable mentions:

Luigi's Mansion (GCN) 4/5

Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story (DS) 4/5

The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap (GBA) 4/5

Super Mario RPG (Remake, Switch) 4.9/5

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom (Switch) 3.8/5

My resolutions for 2024:

Main goal is to grow my collection. I hope I can find some more Wario Land games, so that I can binge play through this whole series. Omori will be released on Switch soon so I want to try that one out too. Maybe I'll take a look at the Kid Icarus, Bayonetta or Donkey Kong series. And whatever new things Nintendo comes up with this year. And maybe get an NES. The only main Nintendo console I'm missing.

[butterbeb]

calling myself out😌✌️

[littlemisslipbalm]

“you get me” (famous!y/n x harry)

Famous!y/n x Harry Styles

First Harry fic so please be kind, but feedback is SUPER appreciated

Initially inspired by the picture of Harry leaving the Gucci store with 15 bags but barely has anything to do with that lol

Definitely thought of Ellen for the interview idk why tho - also I struggle with writing Harry’s dialogue because I really want to get it right, but hopefully the more practice I get, the better/more natural it will sound. ALSO i have like no music or music industry background lol. Somewhat proofread, but its 2:30 am so it could be shit

Fluff!

Warnings: maybe some angst over being famous per say, past loneliness

Word Count: 3.7k literally howwww, i’m going to do a pt. 2 though because it was kind of a long set up and feelingsssss

---

Interviewer: Please, welcome our next guest, a woman who’s sure to have her name written up beside the music greats someday, Ms. Y/N L/N!

You can’t contain the grin that spreads to your face as you carry yourself out onto the stage and see the audience cheering for you. It was your third big interview since your first album had been released and you’d seen your fame skyrocket over night. This being the third one this week meant you’d gotten comfortable getting asked questions, but you also weren’t bored of it yet. It was exhilarating being the center of attention, especially for something that had been your life’s work up until this point. You always had to fight for whatever you got and the recognition you were starting to have was reassurance that you hadn’t been a fool to risk a safe and certain life for your dreams.

The interview begins as the rest had, a few pleasantries, how you were feeling, and then the introduction of the album. The host asked you what your inspiration was for some of the songs and the album name and cover. You loved to talk about the music, it was the whole reason you were there. The meaning, the sound, the name, it all meant so much to you and you talked about how music can be interpreted differently by everyone and even the shifts in someone’s mood can change a song’s meaning, but what it meant to you at the time of writing was always something specific. You practiced those answers in the mirror before the interviews because they were important to you and you didn’t want your words on your art to ever be misconstrued. The host then complimented your style and you were at the point where you thought your interview should be wrapping up when they asked you one more question, and it threw you for a loop.

Interviewer: So Y/N, we’ve been hearing some rumblings around, about you and another famous musician, Mr. Harry Styles. Anything going on there?

Your face heated up, you hadn’t been expecting a personal question about possible relationships. Nothing like this had been asked of you at your previous interviews. It’s about the music, the art, and who you were, it’s always about that and nothing more. To be honest, you were a bit annoyed the host had chosen to stray from those topics. You didn’t care for the celebrity side of being a famous musician, the lack of privacy, the prying eyes of media and the general public. They saw enough of you through your art, you bore your soul through music why did they want to peak into your heart as well?

Y/N: I don’t know if I’d rather be with Harry Styles or actually be Harry Styles. Like, he’s literally such an icon, I want to be able to walk out of a Gucci store after spending hours there with 15 bags full of my purchases and helpers to carry it all out c’mon… He’s also an amazing songwriter, musician, and performer, of course. Didn’t mean to sound superficial, but I’d also love to own even half of his closet.

You hadn’t really answered the question, but the audience laughed and the host obviously got the hint that you weren’t interested in fanning any flames of romance with Harry Styles or anyone else. For one, you didn’t even know the man, but you had always been a loving fan of his. You cited him as one of your role models when you were first starting to try and break into the music world. Second, if you did know him, that wouldn’t be an appropriate topic for your album press junket going on, even if it meant more publicity because of Harry’s big celebrity status. The host decided to qualify their original question with a final sentiment.

Interviewer: I totally feel the same way! I only ask because the outpouring of support you’ve received seems to be from similar groups who also follow Harry. Many have been comparing your sound to his solo career work.

Y/N: Ah...well that’s very kind of people to say. He’s definitely a big inspiration, his creativity and drive is incredible. I’d love to be as successful as him someday.

The interview ended. You and the host shook hands and you waved and sent kisses to the crowd before retreating backstage. You were exhausted, but happy. You hoped to avoid anymore stressful interview questions that didn’t truly revolve around music. Of course, life is never that simple.

-

One month later

You had done countless more interviews and talk shows as promo for your album and the buzz around it had continued to grow. Your fame continued to rise as well and that one question you had dodged at your third interview had come back around to bite you, naturally. Daily Mail’s dumb headline read: “Y/N can’t decide! Date Harry Styles or Steal His Closet?” The Sun was also running with your response and miscontruing it completely, something about how you were madly in love with Harry but jealous of his designer partnerships, you couldn’t even stomach reading the garbage. This was your worst nightmare. Not only was it taking away the focus from your album, but you were also sure this dumb gossip had reached the very set of ears that the gossip was allegedly also about.

You had signed with Columbia Records for your first album, the same record label as Harry Styles, so managers had been in contact with one another about the whole fiasco trying to get the actual truth - which was that the two of you didn’t even know each other and there were no problems whatsoever. Your manager also brought along the good news that Harry had actually listened to your album and loved it, “He said ‘Congratulations’ by the way, loved the sound. Said he’d heard you were very music focused and be open to do some mentoring on songwriting and vocal specifics, if you wanted. It’d have to be in private though, obviously.” She had added the last bit, but you understood why. To have the opportunity to discuss your music with one of your longtime role models, heroes even, was beyond anything you could have imagined coming from your album’s success. And it made the drama all the more palatable because now you at least got to talk to Harry like the media was so adamantly saying you were doing already.

You nodded quickly and agreed, while trying to keep your teenage fangirl excitement hidden below your mature now-famous musician facade. Like you said, Harry was your hero, he’d been your hero since you were in middle school and had Up All Night downloaded on your iPod touch, blasting it as loud as possible, sound hitting your poster-filled walls. You weren’t the same girl as you were then, obviously, you had grown up to be a strong, independent, and confident woman. But, you still smiled at the thought of your younger self with your baby face squealing in the nosebleeds at the Take Me Home Tour (where you swore Harry had looked straight at you) and her seeing you now, dressed in a sleek outfit setting up an appointment to meet with Harry to discuss your first album, a success.

-

The next Thursday evening

You took a deep breath, in through your nose and out through your pursed lips. You were anxious and excited at the exact same time. Your meeting with Harry was tonight, right now actually, and you hadn’t been able to think about much else since your manager had confirmed the meeting last week. She got you the details a couple of days ago, the location: his house in Malibu, the time: 5:45 P.M. You had brought along a copy of your album on vinyl because you thought it sounded best this way, second only to performing it live.

Choosing your outfit for tonight was probably the toughest decision you’d ever made, harder than choosing between an education and following your dreams, harder than choosing your favorite Beatles song. You didn’t want to worry so much, this wasn’t a date you kept reminding yourself, but everything you tried on earlier kept having something wrong with it, too dressy, too boring, too ‘not yourself’. You had settled for these blue high-waisted pants that you’d worn to your first ever podcast interview, a thin black long sleeve, and a brown leather coat that fell below your hips with vans sneakers, casual, simple, yet still true to you and your vibe.

You raised your free arm and formed a fist, hesitant to knock, as if you’d damage Harry’s seemingly perfect Malibu beachfront home by knocking too hard on the wooden front door. You waited a few moments and could here some shuffling behind the door, some incoherent words were seemingly said, but the walls muffled them before they could reach for ears. Soon enough, Harry Styles in the flesh was before you. He beamed down at you, huffing, slightly out of breath as if he had been clear across the house when you knocked. His strong figure towered above your far smaller stature. He was hanging onto the door since he had opened it only slightly. “Hello, Y/N?” he greeted and questioned simultaneously. “Hi,” you responded and extended the same hand that had just rapped against his now open door. He gripped it, ushering you into his home, “Come in, come in, it’s nice to meet you, don’t want you to catch a cold now do we?” He took note of your strong handshake and ring clad fingers.

He walked you into an area between the kitchen and a sitting area. The kitchen was open aside from a bar high top between the two rooms. You sat down at his prompting and made yourself comfortable. “I brought my record on vinyl, sounds best in my opinion, otherwise I’d recommend seeing it live,” you laughed as you handed the vinyl to him and took off your coat. “Technically, y’know, I could hear it live right now, if you were willin’ f’course,” Harry had responded over his shoulder as he placed the vinyl by his idle record player, “Anything to drink?” “Just water for me, please.” His accent was even stronger in person, especially since he had moved back to London and seldomly stayed in California, except for business and quick trips. As far as you knew, he had already been here on business for the week and was able to pencil you in.

You two settled in, with your waters, seated at the bar top beside each other, but swivelling the chairs to face one another more. Again, you were overwhelmed with the reality of the situation, sitting beside Harry Styles as professionals, peers even. He had heard your work and liked it enough to want to discuss it with you. It was a day you never thought would come to pass. He started off not by asking about the music right away, but about how you were doing with the whirlwind that stardom is. “How are you, Y/N? It’s been somewhat of a out of the frying pan into the fire kind of moment for you?” He stared at you intently, caring to hear your answer.

You couldn’t help but chuckle again and contain your smile, “Thank you for asking, Harry. Yeah, its been definitely stressful, but it’s everything I’ve ever wanted and more so the good is still outweighing any bad. Definitely, fucking exhausted though, dunno how many more interviews I can do before my jaw goes completely rigid from talking so much.” It’s Harry’s turn to laugh, his eyes shone with intrigue at what you said and how you said it. You were gorgeous, but it was how your hands helped you through what you were trying to say and the small laughs you tried to keep in while you amused yourself with your words that really made him want to hear you talk all night long.

He agreed about how the promo junket for an album can get tedious and tiresome, but also the absolute fulfillment you get from people loving the music you’ve made. The two of you chatted about surface level personal matters for a little more, but quickly moved to the music. “I took a listen a couple weeks after the album was released. I especially loved the last track. It reminded me so much of a song I never released, actually…” he trailed off.

Your final track had been a ballad, an homage to George Harrison with your use of guitar and sitar, but the lyrics were a story based off of a poem you had written one night in high school. It surrounded a girl never feeling quite good enough for the person she wanted to be with and how it happened everytime, everytime she was ready to giver herself to someone, they were always closed off. Of course it held some truth to your own life and feelings, but you wrote this girl as someone with a seemingly perfect life - when yours was obviously far from any semblance of perfection.

You wondered what Harry’s song would have sounded like, had it been about a seemingly perfect girl or a guy with a seemingly perfect life, always giving himself to the wrong person and getting destroyed by that very fact because he was impatient as the girl in your song had been. “Can I ask, how so? How’d it remind you of your own song, the words or the music?” “Oh, the story, I felt like that for a time in my life and I like to be vulnerable in my songs because it helps me process, but listening to it back has always been too painful. Could never release that or perform it, it’d wreck me.” You nodded, you completely got where he was coming from. You noticed his downcast eyes and his somber tone, you knew not to push it any further.

It was quiet and you decided it’d be okay to take his hand resting between the two of you. “Harry, I understand,” your sincerity spilled into the words, filling the quiet house, “It’s not easy. Feeling that way. Thinking you’re the only goddamn one and why the fuck does it always happen to you? I used to ask my ceiling ‘why me?’ every night of high school” you smiled then. “But you know how it is,” you rubbed your thumb over his large warm hand and he lifted his head, “it gets so much better - c’mon look at us now! It can get hard, too, all this, I’m sure. But our lives? They’re amazing!” He beamed as he had when he had first seen you at his door and when you’d first really spoke. He moved his hand from under your palm to weave your fingers with his, both of your hands with covered in rings and they clinked to fit together, finally resting perfectly fitted. He shook your two hands up and down, “God, you’re so right! That damn song, m’sorry always puts me in a mood,” he shakes his head, “not yours though, f’course, s’lovely, better than my sodding song” he finishes quickly.

After that, the mood lightened right back up. It filled you with such appreciation for Harry that he would trust you so much with such a personal detail since you two had just met. But maybe, he had trusted you because he had felt that same spark between you. It wasn’t necessarily a romantic spark, but it was obvious the two of you were kindred spirits. Besides your album, the two of you talked about everything. You loved the same bands, movies and books, you both loved to cook and had similar fashion taste, you even had the same person type - something you found out late into the night.

At the end of the Side B of your album, Harry switched to a Bill Evans record that had ‘Peace Piece’ on it. You loved that song. So did he. “So...planning to raid my closet?” Harry raised his brows from the record player and walked back to you. You almost sputtered the water in your mouth. Luckily, you got it down. “Pardon?” “All that bad press the two of us have been getting...I watched the interview that kind of ignited the tabloids. You’re obviously not used to those overstepping personal questions.” You nodded. “It’s fine, even if you’d completely shut it down, the tabloids probably would have picked it up still, they snap up anything and everything, true or not.” You softened at his reassurance. You hadn’t expected Harry to bring the interview up, but you were sure he wasn’t happy about it, he was so private, especially about his love life. “Thanks, I’m sorry I tried to laugh it off, kind of made it worse, didn’t I?” “No! Thought it was hilarious and I totally appreciated the sentiment. Little ol’me, an icon? And an amazing artist? All I gotta do is watch that clip and I’ve fed my narcissistic side for the week!” You giggled and replied slyly, “So does that mean I can raid your closet? As compensation, of course.” Harry threw his head back in an all consuming laughter, when he’d composed himself he looked in your eyes again and said, “You just...God, you get me.”

Harry had continued to put records on throughout the night, diligently flipping sides and asking for requests, he of course had an extensive collection. The two of you had moved onto his plush couch that looked out his french doors to the beautiful ocean view. Finally, your exhaustion caught up to you, mid-Harry describing his latest travel fiasco, you glanced up at the clock. You gasped. Harry stopped. “When did it get to be half 12?” you questioned almost incredulously, “I’ve gotta get home, Harry, but this has been truly amazing, more than I could have asked for, so thank you.” Your speech began to rush as you started to get up and gather your things, that had slowly scattered as you’d gotten more comfortable, jacket by the table, shoes around the back of the couch, your phone forgotten somewhere in the couch. You couldn’t believe you’d spent almost seven hours just talking with Harry Styles.

Harry quickly stood up from his relaxed positioned on the couch and asked if you were alright to drive this late. You scoffed, “Oh please, I’ve driven around at 3 am before, I just have to turn up the music and I can cruise.” He smiled, “This was great, Y/N, I know we didn’t really go super in depth into your writing process, but I’d love to write with you sometime or just hang out again f’course. Your seriously talented and obviously a wonderful person.” He didn’t include that he felt like he’d never met anyone like you, never met someone so perfectly matched to himself, in passions but also in work ethic and demeanor - compassionate yet confident. He felt like you got him perfectly and he got you. You had stopped your scramble to gather yourself and now you were both smiling at one another.

This had really been an unforgettable night, you couldn’t believe how well you two had meshed, like childhood friends reconnecting after years apart. “Can I give yeh a hug before you go?” Harry’s voice had grown raspier as the night had progressed. He had grown rather tired an hour ago, but had pushed through because they had been having so much fun and you hadn’t noticed his physical fading or the time, obviously. You stepped toward him and his large tattooed arms enveloped you into his body. His body truly dwarfed yours now as he held you to his chest. You both were warm and soft. He tucked his head on top of yours that rested on his chest. Your arms were loosely resting where his back met his waist because you would have had to strain to get them to encircle him. His arms rested around your small frame. “Love your jacket,” he mumbled into your hair. His rough voice was quiet, but the house was silent otherwise, Tusk Side C had finished around when you had noticed the time. The embrace lasted long, but it felt so amazing you had a hard time pulling yourself away, but you had to get back home.

“G’night Harry” you said softly at the threshold of his home. He had insisted on walking you to the front door at least, since you had declined his offer to walk you out to your car on the street. “G’night. Safe travels.”

You got in your car and headed to your apartment in the city. You didn’t bother digging for your phone so you turned on the radio and drove home singing whatever came on, including your own song at one point. The whole time you drove with a grin. Harry was the nicest person you’d ever met and you were confident that the two of you were friends now. As you pulled into your parking garage it dawned on you why you hadn’t connected your phone immediately when you got in your car. “Stupid, stupid, stupid,” you put the car in park and rested your palms in the depressions of your eyesockets, over your closed eyelids, and rubbed hard. “Fuck!” It was far too late to drive back out to Malibu for your phone and you obviously couldn’t text Harry that you’d left your phone at his place, despite the two of you exchanging numbers during the night for future hang outs, so they didn’t have to be arranged through your managers, like playdates. Even if he found your phone between the cushions, he couldn’t drop it at your place in the morning because he didn’t know your address. This was a whole mess, you thought. You’d have to drive over in the morning and hope he was still there or email your manager from your computer. The former meant you got to see Harry sooner and likely your phone, too.

part 2

-

@berrynarrybanana​

[tatertotthethot]

The Doms Next Door 2.0

THIS IS A TEMPORARY REUPLOAD FOR THIS CHAPTER CUZ TUMBLR IS RAN BY A BUNCH OF BOTS. 2.1 HERE

Warnings/AN: frequent, casually cursing; comical, gay Jimin; insecure reader; steamy flirting; tattoo/sexualized Tae 🙃. Enjoy~ (TAEKOOK EDIT ABOVE IS ARTKOOK DONE BY NONCONMAN ON INSTAGRAM)

copyright © 2018 all rights reserved

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Your tires came to a stop outside of the tattoo shop you've seen online— a brick building, covered in spray paint and street-style art. A sign buzzed over the awning of the entrance doors, with the built-in UV lights and graffiti-styled font displaying the name of the place in neon-red letters. Kink For Ink! The name alone was what first caught your attention last week, when you Googled "Tattoo shops near me" and it pulled up a list, with "Kink For Ink" being the first option. It just seemed so uncanny and fitting at the time, considering the previous run-in you just had with the sex-crazed neighbors a couple nights before. You couldn't help but to click the link to their Instagram.

A profile came up with 53.4k followers, which immediately blew your mind... but you quickly saw why. Every tattoo and piercing, no matter the body-placement, skin-type, or quirky design, was vividly appealing— certainly done by the articulate hands of certified experts. Even in the comments of the piercings that were posted, people were praising them for the "minimal" amount of pain they experienced, despite the fact that some of piercings were done in places you couldn't even fathom the thought of having a needle jammed through.

It said in the bio that the shop is owned by the two artists that work there— Kim Taehyung and Jeon Jungkook. You couldn't find out much about them, all their pictures showed was their work. You even went back to search for a personal account of their own, but nothing came up. You then went back to the bio and clicked a link to the official website, hoping to find out something, but you were met with a disclaimer rule at the top that automatically deemed your chances of even getting your piece done by them, slim-to-none.

• No walk-ins allowed.

• Every request/idea must be sent in through the DMs of our Instagram page. You will only be accepted only if it spikes our personal interests.

Yikes; You were instantly discouraged by this. The piece you wanted was something so common and cliché, that you actually got the image out of a child's coloring book.... It was the cartoon layout of the glass vase and enchanted rose, from the Beauty and the Beast movie. Cheesy, yes. But it was something of personal, nostalgic value. You remember when you were little— roughly around 3 or 4 years of age— when your parents started fighting and would spend all day screaming and throwing things at each other, putting you in a constant state of anxiety. But then you'd go to bed at night and pop the VHS tape, and the movie never failed to put you in a peaceful state of mind— a hopeful one. It's remained as your all-time favorite love story throughout the years. Which, is ironic, considering that the relationship itself was different, but almost as dysfunctional as your parent's. However, the fact that even the Beast was capable of change, and everything wound up so perfect and happy in the end, makes your heart happy. And even now, at age 19, it still puts you in your feelings. The previous remake of a movie is what actually inspired you to get the enchanted rose as a tattoo, after seeing it in 3D not too long ago. But you're only willing to shell out up to $200 for it, at most. You've just started college, and even though Jimin's parents own the house and let the two of you live there, rent free, you're still responsible for half the utility bills from month to month. Blowing every bit of money you have saved up, right at the start of the semester, would just be irresponsible. But $200 was manageable, and you're looking for anything that'll give you a little extra "oomph" to break you out of this introverted shell you've always known. Pushing it off would just delay it, and you were ready for change. The nose piercing you want is just a small little thing that'll hopefully add a bit of flare to the features of your face. These two guys could probably do the piercing/tattoo with a blindfold on and a hand tied behind their back. So, if it meant that you'd be able to get these things done in confidence, without having to worry about the outcome, you figured it wouldn't hurt for you to at least ask, even if they straight-up ignore you. So, after spending an unnecessary amount of time overthinking the wording of your text, you finally constructed a message in your notes and DM'd it to business page, after sending them a small, simple outline of the cartoony rose, and pressed send.

• You: Hello! I've been wanting to get this tattoo done for a very while now, and was hoping one of you will be willing to do it for me... along with piercing my nose? I know it's a very mediocre and cliché piece, and a nose piercing can be done anywhere. But I'm new to the area and I've never gotten a tattoo/piercing done before and I haven't really checked out any other places either because I found this page first. And from what I can see, you guys are pretty efficient and CRAZY talented. So, I trust it'll get done right.... only if you want to! I'm willing to pay $200 for this, but if it costs that much for just the outline I've sent then that's fine as well. But I understand if neither of you want to do it cuz that is really cheap compared to the ones I've seen lol. But either way, thx for ur time ��

A few minutes went by and you had just unlocked your phone to check the message again, when the word "seen" popped below the message. You held your breath for a second— but seconds turned to minutes, and time went by with no reply, what-so-ever. You figured maybe you sounded a little too immature to take seriously; kind of like a prepubescent 12-year-old asking someone out for a dance... and you blew it. Which was disappointing, but predictable. So fuck it. Maybe it's a sign; you shouldn't get it after all.

11pm rolled around, many hours later. You were now hiding beneath your covers, beginning your "amateur threesome" exploration on PornHub. You were ready to see what this whole "2 guys, 1 girl" thing was all about. But just when you were about to type it into the search bar, you were interrupted by an Instagram notification dropping down from the top of your screen.

"KinkForInk sent you a message."

You audibly gasped, eyes turning to saucers as you clicked on the notif and switched over to the Instagram app.

• KinkForInk: Hi (Y/N). This is Tae, one of the artists of the shop. The tattoo you sent in is worth roughly $100... but I want to run an offer by you in hopes that you'll be interested.

— Your brows scrunched in oddity, stomach fluttering. An offer? For you?

• You: Okay, sure. What's that?

• KinkForInk: I've been looking for someone willing to showcase the custom design I've come up with, specifically for a much more... exclusive version of the Beauty and the Beast tattoo you sent. And if you'd be down for letting me and my partner put it on you, it'll be free. No charge. BUT you'll also have to sign a contract saying that you'll do a little bit of modeling for us once it's done. You think you'd be in to doing something like that, even if you get it?

— Your head spun for a second, reading the message over and over again until you could fully wrap your mind around what he was saying.

• You: Hold on... YOU wanna put a tattoo on ME so that I model for you? And it's FREE? Are you sure about this? I'm not even model material lol.

• KinkForInk: Yes, yes, and yes, you are. You'd be perfect for this.

• You: How do know that? Is it a face tattoo? Cuz I only have 6 selfies on here and you can't see anything past my shoulders.

—"Seen" came up as soon as you hit send, but a couple of minutes rolled by with no reply to the message, nor was he even typing. Maybe you came off a little rude. But it was already sketchy and it was a logical question.

— An image suddenly popped up: a screenshot of your Facebook profile. Then another— and much to your horror, it was the photo Jimin tagged you in last week, when the two of you were swimming at a local community pool. You were wearing a simple two piece, sitting at the foot of the lawn chair Jimin was also sitting in, as his legs were visible on either side of you and his lap was practically framing your ass. The photo was at an upward angle and looked so scandalous— but really, you had just asked Jimin to put sun screen on your back and he didn't want to stand up because the pavement was too hot against his bare feet. But you actually liked the picture at the time; it was just a silly joke and your ass actually looked quite nice from that angle. Plus, everyone knows nothing sexual actually goes on between the two of you, for obvious reasons. But Taehyung doesn't, so you couldn't help but dreadfully cringe when you saw the caption of the screen shot.

"Babymama 💦🍆"

• KinkForInk: Is this you??

• You: Yes, that's me. The caption is a joke tho... pay no mind to that. But this is like, really happening? You really think it'd look good on me?

— Why that picture though? You couldn't help but wonder.

• KinkForInk: Yes. Like I said, you're perfect for this piece. Are you down to at least see what the tattoo will look like? We don't expect you to be experienced with modeling or anything, but if you listen to us and cooperate, you'll do just fine.

• You: Yes I wanna see, and I'll do the best I can if I decide to get it... I'm just a bit shy, is all.

• KinkForInk: You'll be in good hands. I promise.

• You: Okay... are you going to show me??

• KinkForInk: Can't send it over a message, I don't want it plagiarized or the concept stolen. But the piece itself isn't necessarily crazy or anything, just more creative. I'd be more than happy to show you at my shop some day this week, if you'd be willing to swing by.

• You: Yeah, I can do that. When should I come?

• KinkForInk: Are you available after 5 tomorrow?

• You: I am, I get off at 4:30.

• KinkForInk: Great. Be here by 5:30, and make sure you've eaten in case you like the piece and wanna get started. It's pretty big for a first timer and gonna take a lot of time and patience. It'll have to be done in sessions but I hope you have a fair enough pain tolerance to at least get the outline of it done first.

— It can't be any worse than a bikini wax, you thought, shivering at the memory. That a story for another time. You decided on an alternative scenario.

• You: I give blood from time to time... but that's easy and doesn't really hurt that much. I think I can handle it though... maybe. I honestly don't know lol, I'm sorry 😣. But I can try my best. Can I ask where it's supposed to go?

• KinkForInk: That's okay, I'll work with you. It's supposed to go down the middle of your back. Starts between the center of your shoulder blades, and trails down the length of your spine to your lower lumbar. You'll see how it looks once we transfer a template on your back. But if you don't like it, there will be no hard feelings from my end. I can still do the tattoo you want if that's the case, free of charge just for your time.

• You: Oh no, you don't have to do that! I'd still pay!

• KinkForInk: Not if I don't accept your money. Trust me, I'm not worried about it. The nose piercing is gonna be $30 regardless, though. JK isn't so lenient.

• You: Of course. Will I have to take my shirt and bra off for the tattoo?

• KinkForInk: Yes, and for the pictures once it's done.

— Your mind blanked at that; thumbs froze over the keypad. He was typing again.

• KinkForInk: Don't let that discourage you. Again, you're in good hands. You can bring something to cover your chest. And the pics will be if your back as well.

• You: Okay, I can handle that. So 5:30 tomorrow?

• KinkForInk: Yes, please don't flake on us!

• You: Lol, I won't. I'll be there.

"They're gonna knock us the fuck out and sell our organs to the black market," Jimin declared. He had parked next to you outside of the shop, and was now sitting in the driver seat of his car with his door locked and windows all the way up, refusing to get out. You were standing right outside his door, still having to talk on the phone. "And is this Tae-guy an AllState representative or something?"

Jimin is petty. You wanted him here for moral support— which he's usually reliable for— but this time, he's just plain salty right and doing everything he can to remind you of that. Reason is, he's been begging you to get a matching tattoo with him ever since your 18th birthday, and you've always refused because of what he wanted to get.

Cupcakes. Jimin wanted to get matching cupcake tattoos... in honor of Cupcakke the legend. Sorry, but H E L L no.

You rolled your eyes, growing frustrated. He only has enough time to pop in and confirm that these two aren't gonna kill you, and then he's gotta head home to get ready for work. You were already supposed to be in there. It was 5:33pm, 3 minutes past the time.

"Jimin, you're the one that insisted on coming along! And now you're making me late!" you ranted. "I'm going in without you."

"Hold your horses, hoe! I'm finishing my blueberry slushie," He retorted, sassily bringing the straw to his mouth and loudly slurping it into the phone. He then abruptly flinched away from the straw with a disgusted expression, nostrils flared, body locking up; lips drawing into an air-tight knot that was so extreme and unnatural, it caused an ugly snort to break out of your nose.

He smacked his lips in exaggeration to the taste, face falling back into stone as an eyebrow arched over the top of his aviators; unamused and saltier than before... Like you were at fault for that, too.

"Or... Blueberry-ass, I should say."

That forced another giggle out of you as Jimin stiffly rolled his window down, phone still pressed to his ear and eyes still scowling at you behind the inspector shades. He bit down on the straw and withdrew it with his teeth before dumping the dark-blue contents of the drink out of the window, making it a point to shake the styrofoam cup empty of every drop before tossing it over his shoulder and into back seat. He then spat the straw out of his mouth with an audible "PLUUUUH!" of a French accent, and waited until the window rolled all the way up again, just so he could hang up the phone. You scoffed at this as you shoved your phone back into your pocket, scornfully watching Jimin exit the car and slam the door behind him. He snatched his glasses off his face as his cotton-candy hair swayed in the breeze, revealing his scornful eyes right back at you as he gestured for you to lead the way in exasperated manner— as if you were the one wasting his time now.

"Go on, lead us to the grave," He shooed, a snippy little shit. You sauntered away, walking up the side of the shop, then paused just before reaching the glass entrance door, when you remembered how much of a coward you are. You've never even stepped into a parlor before, and supposedly, this was a famous one. Which makes it more and more surreal when you think about it.

"Are we doing the mannequin challenge now? Is that what we're doing?" Jimin sardonically inquired.

"You go first, I'm nervous!" You whisper-hissed.

"You don't want me to go in there first— I'll show out," he reasoned, simply stating a fact.

"Please don't," you whined.

"Then, again, I'll show out?" He reiterated, as if to say duh. "How else am I supposed to break the ice? I look like Timmy Turner's Fairy-Gay- Parent."

You gave him a wary look... he's right. You sighed, slightly kicking your foot in distracted defeat. Fuck, you hated making an entrance to new places—

"Hold up— is that Drake?" Jimin suddenly blurted, holding his hand up to silence you. You honed in on the muffled track playing from behind the glass door, and Jimin's face soon light up like a Christmas tree before he spun around you, unstoppable.

"Jimin, NO—!"

"KIKI, DO YOU LOVE ME—?!"

It was already too late. The door was flying back behind him as he Milly-Rocked his way into the shop, leaving you no choice but the chase in behind him.

"—ARE YOU RIDING? SAY YOU'LL NEVA-EVA LEAVE FROM BESIDE ME— hello there."

You were panting, coming to a stop right behind Jimin, where you instantly latched on to the back of his shirt as you met the face of the man behind the studio counter. And, as corny as this is gonna sound: the world actually stilled for a solid beat... or maybe you were in the verge of cardiac arrest.

A pair of glossy-Black eyes looked up at the two of you; A series of silver-studded earrings trailed along the outer cartilages, peaking out beneath a head of soft, layer-swept hair. It was a Carmel-tinted blonde in color— thick and shaggy, and neatly spilling in waves around a headband that proudly sported a high-dollar brand-name you've never seen anyone wear in person before. G U C C I, it read— Meaning that the headband alone was probably worth more than some of your college text books, put together. It sat just a few inches above a pair of dark brows, that oddly brought out the shape of his cat-like eyes— irises like polished marbles. His ample lips had a sharp, well-defined Cupid's-bow, and a natural shade of pink that fit the porcelain appearance of his melanin-kissed complexion, to the finest degree.

And here you are, looking like an actual bum. You had just enough time to clock out of work and head straight over here to make it in time. You didn't even have any makeup on, and the only thing hiding your raggedy hair from those captivating eyes is your old baseball cap from high school. It took a second for him to take the bold presence that was Park Jimin— who was also frozen to the spot as he openly checked the guy out. He was hunched over the counter, a v-neck hoodie covering the rest of him with a thin, loose-fitting material. It was Black and allowed a full visual of his tan neck, and prominent collar bones. And it certainly didn't hide the fact that he had a pair of wide-set shoulders, either. A pencil sat in his hand— one that was laced with masculine veins, and lot of decorative ink. There was a silver ring on his thumb.. and a very heavy-looking Rolex watch.

The man cracked a grin at Jimin— a boxy one that dimpled in at the corners.

"Love the hair," he humorously began, twisting a quirky eyebrow at Jimin. You subconsciously snagged the bill of your hat as your eyes went a little wide at how mature the man's voice was.

"Love the watch," Jimin retorted, then reached around and gripped you by the wrist before pulling you into full view beside him. "You wouldn't happen to be Taehyung...?"

"Mhm," the man hummed, absentmindedly moving his wrist at the mention of his watch. His eyes cut over to you, and you swore you could see a minuscule reflection of yourself in his eyes, before they flashed back at Jimin and blinked. "You must be the babydaddy?"

Blood rushes to your ears. It's really him... a guy who looks like a high-dollar model himself, asking you to be his canvas model. Your own conscious didn't even know what to say right now. So you stayed quiet and still as Jimin took charge... which was a mistake.

"She wishes, but no. I'm the best-friend— and a gay one, at that," Jimin replied, and you knew he did that for his benefit. Thot. "I'm just here to make sure you're not gonna sacrifice her to Satan, or anything of that nature. I need her around in case I ever forget the Netflix password."

Taehyung chuckled at that, mouth opening to reveal a row of teeth shinier than Chip Skylark's. But then, you caught something behind his teeth that caused your gut to leap. A silver ball... a tongue ring. Your thoughts clouded over for a second.

"Well, I can assure you, she's safe with me," he said, looking over at you again. You blinked, nothing more. His brow arched at your lack of response, but this time, it was done more handsomely as he was still smirking at you. "Still, you don't look too thrilled to be here... You sure you wanna do this?"

"She's just nervous because you're really fucking hot," Jimin announced, unyielding. "You should feel how sweaty her hand is."

"Don't listen to him— I'm gay too," You lied in panic, trying to defend yourself from the absolute truth Jimin spoke just then. You snatched your hand away from him and jutted a finger at the door, eyes beading and lid twitching as your nerves ran amuck. "Goodbye, Jimin."

"She's a lonesome hetero," Jimin told Taehyung, assuring him with a face that showed no bluff. "One look at her camera roll, and you'd see for yourself—" You were yanking him away by the arm now, in a tug-of-war game that Jimin obviously could've won if he really wanted to. But he figured you suffered enough and eventually let you drag him out of the shop, waving bye to Taehyung before turning to look at you with beading eyes.

"I think he wants to fuck you— text me as soon as you can," Jimin uttered with unmoving lips as before he walked to his car. You stopped for a second, noticing he was actually being serious. How could he possibly think that he wants to fuck you, just from that small encounter? And what is the odd sensation currently coiling in your stomach? Things grew awkward again when you re-entered the shop, coming to a stand at the same spot... only alone now. He was still amused, it seemed. And so calm and cool despite this odd, intense look in his eyes. It gave him a Casanova effect, where all he had to do was give you that look and it'd instantly make you blush.

"He seems like a fun person to be around," he noted, somewhat honestly, but more so making fun of the red-hot appearance of your face.

"He's a pain in the ass," you muttered, trying to conjure up a smirk but hardly even able to speak properly from how dry your mouth was. It felt like there was a white-hot iron expanding in your throat. "I'm really sorry about him."

"Don't be. I'm just glad you're here— thought you'd chicken out." You nervously wiped your clammy palms over the back pockets of your jeans as Taehyung got up from the barstool behind the counter and approached you on the other side of it, a whole head-and-a-half taller than you. He was wearing black cardigan jeans and matching combat boots.. his headband and jewelry the only thing not black on him. And oddly enough, he made it look fucking fantastic.

"Mh-mm," You hummed, not trusting your voice. You've never needed a sip of water so bad in your life— he even smelled expensive.

"Well, It's very nice to meet you," he formerly began, and you mustered up the normality of placing your (dried) hand into his much larger one, as he held his out to you in greeting. And boy, was he close. So close that the heels of your spine itches to lean back from the proximity.

"It's nice to meet you, too. I'm really sorry if I'm acting weird. I'm just nervous." — Your mind struggled to stay focused on your words, arm tensing at the skin-to-skin contact. You were extra-effected by the firmness in his grip. You really wanted to look down at all the bold ink you saw dashing across the veiny surface of his tanned hand, or see if those were images or scripted letters on the knuckles of lengthy fingers... But you were held captive by those God-blessed eyes... And that fucking tongue ring. It was infecting your head in ways that weren't necessarily healthy for your current state of mind, as you saw it peering in and out at certain words.

"And physically shaking," Taehyung pointed out, brows twitching down at your trembling hand in his as if he was concerned for it. But his smirk gave off an odd sense of fascination to the involuntary symptom, like it was cute or something? Hm. He glanced back up at you, causing your dehydrated throat to bob as his other hand came to clasp over the rest of yours, swallowing it completely from the wrist down. "Intimidated?"

"V-Very," you spluttered, a small slither of saliva copulating down your throat as you looked back up at him. He absentmindedly rolled his tongue ring over the button row of his teeth as he watched you with tainted eyes— undoubtably getting cocky with that damn grin of his and proudly teasing you about your reaction to him. It gratified the effortless sex-appeal he had. You were even beginning to imagine that tongue ring elsewhere, and you literally just met him. Then, as you felt the band of a ring move along with the pad of his thumb as gently ran it across your trembly knuckles, chills shot up all the way to your shoulder. Oh... oh wow. You glanced down at his knuckles on reflex this time, and saw a four-letter word scripted in black ink across the bottom row of his knuckles, and another word scripted on the middle section of his fingers. A silver band on his naked thumb. STAY TRUE, it said.

"And why's that?"

"I.. feel like you're a celebrity," you sheepishly admitted, your other hand wedging into your back pocket as you had to stop yourself from reaching for the bill of your hat again. Is he flirting? The words seem too innocent for the way he was making you feel. It was getting so hot in the oven of his massive palms, and he wasn't even squeezing you hard enough to cut off any circulation, but yet your fingers were beginning to tingle.

"Mm, no. Just a little popular, really," he granted, teetering his head a little as he pondered the thought. You could see his vocal chords contract in his sleek neck as they project his smooth, pungent voice. "You still trust me?"

"Mhm," was all you could muster. He'd gotten even closer, to where his hand had gone into a prayer stance around yours. You were aware of how wide your eyes had gone from the awe you... you knew this was just the beginning. He was going to be very handsy throughout this whole process. But in a very twisted way, you were more than okay with that. Even if it meant you were at risk of fainting from actual dehydration. Maybe you were in over your head. But you couldn't will yourself away from this now. And then, just as a wide, heart-stopping smile edged out on that mind-numbingly handsome face, the door at that back of the room swung open, and heavy-metal rock blasted through the quiet vibe of the scenery and caused you to jump a little at the disturbance. Taehyung shot a wicked smile over his shoulder, and his next words nearly knocked you out right then and there as you beheld yet another, breathtaking sight.

"Oh, there you are," Tae eagerly acknowledged, one hand still holding yours as he walked around to grab your with the other, presenting you to the.. hulking presence in the room. "This is (Y/N), our next little experiment."

[theemptyskies]

So I was sitting, trying to work on a bit of art, when my mind took a left turn and was like "How would you turn Katara evil?". So over the course of three hours I wrote this. It's intended to set the ground work for what the rest of the story would be should I decide to continue it. Any future chapters would be much more detailed as that's where the bulk of the story truly begins. TWs: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Execution Style Murder, References to Early Childhood Trauma. I think that's all of them.

______________________

Blood's Calling

Absolute Power Corupts Absolutely. It was a foolish thought which had once caused Katara to swear never to bloodbend again. It was a memory she could recalled clearly, as if she was reliving the moment. She remembered sensing Hama's veins and arteries, flowing like rivers throughout her body. She remembers desperately grasping those rivers, ripping the will of thier controller away. Forcing the old master to submit to her. It was her first taste of power. True power.

She was no longer the weak child who watched as her mother resigned herself to death. She was no longer the young teen who froze in shock as a Fire Navy vessel slammed through her villages wall. She could use this. She could prevent other young children from being orphaned. She could...

That night the thought stopped there. It wasn't the power that scared her. No aspect of waterbending has ever scared her. What terrified Katara, was that she enjoyed it. She enjoyed forcing Hama to release her friends, saving thier lives. She loved the control, knowing she would never be helpless again. It felt wrong at the time, relishing in such a thing. Subjugation was what the Fire Nation was fighting for. So she swore never to use it again.

____________________________________________

That promise was not long lived. Storming the Southern Raider vessel was an opportunity she never believed could be a possibility. How could she possibly turn away the opportunity to bring her mother justice. To stop whatever future, monsterous actions these beasts were sure to commit.

Under the light of the full moon, her blue eyes, darker than the ocean's deepest abyss, bore into the ship as she flew closer. Calling out with her bending, nearly the entire crew was swept out to sea. Boarding the vessel, she made quick work of the few men left on the deck before storming inside, water trailing behind her. Katara had almost forgotten the former Fire Prince was with her until he stopped a solder attempting to enter through a door they were passing.

As the captains door was blasted open, she gave him no time to retaliate. His blood called to Katara, and she answered. The fire in his hands flickered out immediately as she turned his body against him. Images of her mother's body, charred unrecognizable. A smell of burnt flesh seared into her mind. As the memories assaulted her, Katara was left feeling one desire permeating her being. She would make him suffer.

She cramped his hand immediately before dragging him around, slamming the appendage into the floor. Katara smiled slightly, savoring in the power she now held over her mother's killer. She forced the captains arms behind his back, contorting the joints to near dislocation. His blood was singing to her, and unlike the first time, she was not afraid to grasp it.

Zuko's questioning of the man broke through her rage. Lifting him to look her in the eye, she knew within a moment that it wasn't him. As if being snapped from a trance, she realized what she had done, nearly torturing an man who'd never wronged her. Quickly releasing him, Katara heard the identity of her target as she walked away.

____________________________________________

She believed that was the last time she'd ever bloodbend. She was wrong. Since that day, the urge to bloodbend was stronger than before. Every full moon, she could sense the steady pulses of her sleeping friends, like faint whispers begging her take control. She chose not to of course. Katara couldn't imagine subjecting them to such a power again.

Time passed, the war finally ended, Zuko ascended to the throne. On the surface, the world was at peace, or so it seemed. Her epiphany came a few months after the wars end. It was a couple hours past sundown on the night of a full moon. Once again the desire to bloodbend filled her senses, withholding sleep from her grasp. Katara's recent appointment as ambassador to the Southern Watertribe brought her to Caldera, assisting in negotiating a trade agreement between thier Nations.

With sleep alluding her, she decided to walk through the the main city, hoping the cool night air would help clear her mind. Passing an alley, she heard an odd noise. Stepping into the darkness and turning a corner around the building revealed a sight that made Katara's blood boil. Backed into a corner by a man wielding a knife was a young woman, a small child was hugging the back of her pant leg, large innocent eyes reflecting fear. Looking at the child, her mind flashed to another little girl, standing in an igloo, not knowing that was the last time she'd hear her mother's voice.

Katara wouldn't let that happen again. Grasping the man's blood, she lifted him into the air, sending him crashing against the wall.

"Take the girl and go." Katara's voice lacked the passion that it typically carried. Instead, a cold voice, sharper than any blade of ice came from her.

She didn't give the man a chance to rise as she seized him again. Katara brought him to his knees, arms bent behind his back, forcing him to look up at her. Drawing water from her pouch with her off hand, a large icicle hovered in the air.

"Please..." His voice quivered with fear. The same fear that was in the child's eyes mere moments ago. She directed a dark glare at the man.

"How many have begged you the same way your begging me..." It was a whisper, however the words cut through the air like a knife. She didn't give the creature a chance to respond. With a swift motion, the icicle flew threw the air. A sickening thunk echoed in the alley, as the ice slammed into the monster's heart.

A crack of thunder preceded a downpour during her walk back to the palace. A sense of detatchment settled over Katara. Of course she considered it to be more of an awakening. Despite thier efforts, ending the war, negotiating treaties, writing laws, people were still suffering at the hands of monsters impersonating people. The legal system is slow and flawed. It let's too many slip through, allowing them to continue thier torment.

'I will never, EVER, turn my back on people who need me!'

The memory echoed through her being. An oath she swore, resonating from the core of her being. The legal system failed repeatedly but she would not. Katara had power. The idea of what true power was is something Katara never understood until now. The ability to take dreams, desires, and force them into reality. She could change things. Bring justice to people who've suffered and protect children from the horrors that still plagued the world.

____________________________________________

A year passed and one thing became evident. Katara needed to get stronger. She'd made strides in eliminating the beasts that stalked and preyed upon the innocent. But it wasn't enough. There were too many for her to only take action once a month. Traditional waterbending was too loud to use against them. If she was caught, her friends wouldn't understand. She needed to do this, to protect the people. She needed bloodbending.

The training started much how Hama had described inventing the bending form. She started with small animals, which she mastered rather quickly unsurprisingly. The larger ones, like the tiger seals, proved to be a much bigger challenge, one she eventually completed. The lack of the moon's light was a difficult obstacle to overcome Yet as she stood before the kneeling moose lion, whining in pain as it failed to break from her will, she knew she was ready.

The next year was far more successful. With the growing population in her own tribe, Katara had to make sure the vermin were weeded out as soon as possible. Patrolling every night she was home allowed her to remove sixteen threats to her people. She found another twelve during her trip to the Northern Tribe, where she helped negotiate an alliance with them. The corruption there ran deep. Extra effort would be made during her next trip.

The Earth Kingdom is by far where Katara made the greatest impact. Twenty three criminals were slew in Omashu, another thirty one during her month long stay in Ba Sing Se and fifteen bandits who tried to ambush her during her travel between the major cities. It was an interesting observation, how quickly the eyes on these creatures shifted from arrogance to fear once they no longer held the power. Not unlike the one in the alley that first night. So many of those beasts have been removed by her, and she knows she protected countless people in the process. Katara knew she was doing the right thing, hearing children playing outside only reaffirmed her resolve.

Katara had only been back home for a few days when Aang landed at her village center. Running out of her igloo to greet him, she hesitated at his serious expression.

"Aang, it's good to see you."

"You too, Katara. I wish it was under better circumstances though." Katara tensed at his words as Sokka exited thier igloo behind her.

"Hey Aang. What's up?"

"Zuko needs our help. There's a group of rebels in the Fire Nation. According to his letter, they call themselves the New Ozai Society. They want to dethrone him and restart the war." Aang said. Katara didn't give any outward reaction to his statement. She hadn't been to the Fire Nation since that first night in the alley.

"We'll help. Come on Sokka." Katara immediately cut in as he finished speaking. Turning, she headed back inside the igloo, lost in thought as she began packing. Her neglect of the Nation was clear. How could she allow those scum to coalesce into such a threat. She would make up for it during this trip. She needed a way to learn who all was involved and where they met. Someone who could get inside thier ranks. Who wouldn't report her own involvement to Zuko or her friends. Her thoughts led her to one person who would be accepted by them with no problem. She wasn't happy about it, but it couldn't be helped. At the very least the visit would be interesting. After all, with all of Katara's travels, she had yet to see the inside of an asylum.

"Appa, Yip, Yip!" Aang called, begining thier journey across the sea.

___________________________________________

So, as you can see, the route I would take to make Katara a bad guy would be to take a core aspect of her character (in this case "I will never, EVER, turn my back in people who need me." Still one of my fav moments for her character btw.) And twist it into something dark. I took the helplessness surrounding her mother's death to foster a craving for control within her which connected to bloodbending. I tried to depict a steady dehumanization of criminals in her eyes through the time skips. I felt really awkward writing dialogue but hopefully you all enjoyed my take on a Darker Katara :)

[nextwarden]

Webtoons are good for the soul PART II - ECLECTIC BOOGALOO

A continuation of this.

Sea Salt and Sand by neggut [ongoing]

In the autumn holidays 3 months ago, Brynn and Bailey shared a kiss. When Bailey left, Brynn tried to forget all about her and continue living an unremarkable life, only for Bailey to suddenly transfer to her school! What follows is a coming of age story full of pining, misunderstandings and confusion as Brynn and Bailey question the true nature of their relationship. 

It’s cute and a bit angsty but not too much. The art style often feels incomplete or rushed but in a good way, its flaws give character to the characters and the story. One of my all time favourites.

Apathy meets labrador/10

Dragonbourne by Gummy Shark [ongoing]

After a troubled past, Sir Ross Edmund Avery is somewhat content to lead a mundane existence, alone in his house. However, when he stumbles upon a child in the woods on Solstice Night who is anything but mundane, his simple life will be turned upside down.

A scar(r)ed man adopts a feral child, hijinks ensue. Once again, the art style is endearing, full of curves and long lines. Haven’t checked on that one in a while but the first twenty chapters were very promising.

Found family/10

The Last Human by Zack Jordan [ongoing]

She's the galaxy's worst nightmare: a Human. Fortunately, she's the last one. Now her adoptive (alien) mother is realizing that raising a young Human is no easy task.

Basically the badass and child duo trope but the truth may surprise you. Fun, cute, very wholesome, and surprisingly emotionnaly philosophical at times. Spidermom is best mom.

Recommend/10

Vampire Husband by Scragony [ongoing]

The life of Charles the Vampire an Cheryl the human after years of marriage.

What if tragic romance between human and vampire but they had their “happy-ever-after”? This is after. It’s funny and cute.

Relationship goals/10

Blood Stain by sigeel [ongoing]

A story about courage, growing up and finding friendships in most unlikely places... spiced with some MAD SCIENCE! 

Haven’t quite wrapped my head around this one yet, but it’s fun and drawn by sigeel (a.k.a. Linda Sejic) so of course it’s beautiful. Enjoyed it a lot, will have to keep reading.

Bloody merry/10

Punderworld by sigeel [ongoing - on hiatus]

Hades' and Persephone's love-struck misadventures.

Another take on Hades and Persephone’s love story. Once again, sigeel, so of course I love the art.

Bumbling idiots/10

The Queen and the Woodborn by Shiniez [ongoing]

Far away behind seven hills and seven forests, seven fields and seven rivers, there lived a Queen... welcome to the queen and the woodborn. a fairy tale romance for the mature readers about the unseen Queen and the Goddess in the woods. a tale of the two forgotten by the world around them who will make the world remember their names. expect gods and monsters and a romance for the ages.

Not many chapters yet but very long ones to compensate. This one is by Shiniez (a.k.a. Stjepan Sejic) so, once again, love the art. The story, the character designs and concepts, and the pace are all amazing.

Very wow/10

P.E.T.S. by Gyxks [ongoing]

Just when Tasha was about to start a new life, she was abducted by aliens. Fortunately, she and other humans were rescued by an interstellar general named Tourmaline. She soon discovered that her body was unfit to return home without endangering life on earth. Join her on her journey traversing this new world and these new feelings for an alien general. 

POV: You’re living your best life as a young adult, at the shopping mall at 2am in your pyjamas, when suddenly death aliens rain pain all around and you’re abducted only to be saved by tall buff alien commander lady. Romance ensues. Maybe, it’s slow burn but quite enjoyable to read.

Blush/10

Scoob and Shag by Misterie Krew [ongoing]

Scoob and his best pal Shag are up to their usual hi-jinks, but everything is not as it seems in their latest adventure. 

No relations to any character whatsoever. None. None at all. Also no relations to any kind of sense at all either. Can’t quite explain that one except that it’s genius. Just read it.

Is that a gun?/10

Bewitched by peachyytown [ongoing]

The witch who keeps "kidnapping" the princess is actually her girlfriend and they're just going on dates.

Short but cute alternative take on all that witch/monster/princess shenanigans. In the same vein as Our days in Lumain. Also the art is very nice.

Meetcute/10

When the Pink Trees Bear Fruit by neggut [completed]

A sweet love blooms between two women on an orchard in 1973.

A short story, five chapters only, but play devastatingly well with one’s heart. In the same vein as It Stems From Love by Soya S. Holm. neggut ist sehr gut.

Tears/10

Rooftops & Roommates by Zaanart [ongoing]

Jeb is an architecture major at university, rooming with his best friend Todd. There's just one problem... Jeb’s secretly a gargoyle! Between studying, partying, and a bad ghost problem, will Jeb be able to keep his true identity a secret?

Jeb is sweet, Jeb is fresh, but Jeb is decidedly not very good at keeping a secret. It’s funny, slice-of-life, roommate college shenanigans at its finest. With a magical twist.

Ship/10

Everything is Fine by Mike Birchall [ongoing]

Sam and Maggie are a normal couple, in a normal house, in a normal neighborhood. There is nothing strange about their heads, their neighbors or their sweet little dog. Everything is Fine.

I haven’t actually started this one yet, but the premise is very very very interesting. Perhaps not for thos who are faint of heart? Deceptively cute. Or is it?

It’s fine/10

Castle Swimmer by Wendy Lian Martin [ongoing]

What happens when your entire life is ruled by a prophecy – your future foretold by people you’ve never met, who died long before you were born.  Such is the story of two young sea creatures.  One believed to be a guiding light for his people, a Beacon who will lead them to a bright, prosperous future.  The other is a teenage prince for who’s destiny is to KILL the Beacon so that HIS own people might thrive.  When both reject the course set for them, it leads to a raucous adventure as big and unpredictable as the ocean itself – and a romance that nobody could have predicted.

It’s fish. It’s gay. It’s under da sea and ya gotta kiss the boy. I haven’t read it all yet but enough to vouch for it and to have some vested interest in the universe and its lore.

Enemies to lovers/10

Demon Highschool by Kiiyoko [ongoing]

After a compromise it was agreed that criminals would attend a "demons highschool" where they would work as slaves for demons And while it was all in good favor, things take a very dark and twisted turn at said, highschool.

There’s something, some kind of twist, about the MC which I haven’t gotten to yet, and which I am very interested to discover. I’m not quite sure how I feel about this one as of now, mostly curious I’d say.

Pet/10

Hooky by Miriam Bonastre Tur [completed]

Dani and Dorian have missed the bus of the school of magic. Now, they must find someone who teach them how to be a great and good witches... Or maybe not.​ 

This one is a strange one about witchery and family. Surprisingly deep and serious at times, very enjoyable. Unfinished on Webtoon but a good start to get into the story.

Siblings/10

Loving Reaper by Jenny Jinya [ongoing]

Animals struggle. Pets and Wildlife alike. The reaper cares for their stories and helps them with the crossover. Short stories about the "Loving Reaper" to raise awareness and collect funds. Breaking hearts for a good cause.

Beautiful bittersweet stories about animals, pets, life and death and love.

Tissues/10

Batman: Wayne Family Adventures by StarBite, CRC Payne, Kielamel Siba, Lan Ma, C.M. Cameron, and Camille Cruz [ongoing]

Batman needs a break. But with new vigilante Duke Thomas moving into Wayne Manor and an endless supply of adopted, fostered, and biological superhero children to manage, Bruce Wayne is going to have his hands full. Being a father can't be harder than being Batman, right? 

What if Bat-family but happy? Official comic, barely started, very fun.

Wholesome/10

The First Night With the Duke by MSG, Taeva, from an original work by Hwang DoTol [ongoing]

A handsome, selfish noble falls for a beautiful, kind commoner -- at least, that’s how the story’s supposed to go. When an average college student wakes up as Ripley, an extra in her favorite romance novel, she resolves to enjoy the luxuries of her character’s status while watching the novel's plot unfold from the sidelines. However, her plans are soon derailed when she finds herself in bed with no other than Duke Zeronis, the novel’s hero! Dodging the villainess’ schemes, the Duke’s advances, and her own feelings, can Ripley keep the story on track and survive beyond the first night? 

Haven’t read that one but a very dear (and respectable) friend (*cough*  @berigolote​  *cough*) of mine keeps pestering me to give it a try. So here it is, try it.

Do it before me and you get a cookie/10

HEART Anthology by Marvin.W, caw-chan and many other artists. [ongoing]

Featuring stories from the 2020 Short Story Contest!  From wholesome stories to tearjerkers, are you ready to catch these feelings?

A collection of beautiful stories on the shorter side, all about the many kinds of love in life, the many beauties of it, and the pains that make it worth living.

Tears that warm the heart/10

In My Heart by Redfield42 [ongong]

Sasaki Mari is a typical delinquent troublemaker whose only goal is to get a boyfriend, but due to her reputation as bully and low grades, all the boys reject her. Then she decides to change her style, and asks for help from the student with the best grades in the class.

It starts off light and fund and progressively seems to delve a little bit more into the seriousness of life. Not a tragedy, however, and very much worth a read still.

I think I have a trope I like/10

My awkward princess by LazyArts [ongoing]

This love story is about a girl named Luna charlotte, and the student council president Alice Evelyn. Luna is a delinquent whom often gets in trouble, as Luna reaches the end of the line she almost gets expelled, now luna has to become a model student with the help of Alice. Will Luna be expelled or will she succeed, read to find out.

Along the lines of Not So Shoujo Love Story, In My Heart, and Susuhara is a Demon. Delinquent/Good Student meetcute, romantinc hijincks ensue.

Seduction/10

RAINBOW! by Rue & Sunny Gloom [ongoing]

This is the story of a girl named Boo. She has pink hair and a vivid imagination and she is about to discover a side of herself that she never considered before. 

Okay, so yes, this one is also also a delinquent meets cute nice girl, but - BUT! - there’s an element of story telling that I love about it: the way we see Boo’s anxiety incorporated visually into the story. Just for that it is one of my favourite recent discoveries!

Protecc/10

-----------------------

Okay, that’s all for part II. Hope you enjoy those as much as I do. Thanks for your attention, sorry for the length and, please, do keep on reading, they all deserve it! As do you.

PART I

[strxnged]

basically what happened in the tsukki dream was that me, child me, and my fam went to a mountain or smth and we were in the visitors center, (my POV changed to child me, and old me disappeared?? i also aged up randomly so i was like 7).

and my parents were like oh theres kids in the playroom, go play w them, and ofc antisocial me was like 'uhhh, i literally dont know them tho' but i went anyway. i just sat in a corner doing crosswords and coloring but the other kids were bothering me. and i was seriously just blowing through the puzzles but these kids were distracting me. then babie tsukki who was around my age came along and was like 'stop being annoying u dumb kids' and they prob thought he was older and scary cuz of his height and left. and i said thanks and we vibed together in the corner talking about dinosaur train because dinosaur train is bomb.

then we had to leave but our parents saw that we were good friends and followed each other on twt (i would like to specify that the accounts were mine and tsukkis, like we're children but we have them, maybe we got them when we were born?? anyways our parents controlled them until we were old enough to use them. this is so weird and im pretty sure its because ive been reading smaus nonstop these past few days lmao).

okay now flash forward to when we're both teenagers so around 16, and we get our accounts. i look through the ppl who follow me and i see tsukki, and im like 'waitttt, i lowkey remember him' but i didnt do anything about it until i saw the team practicing in the gym when i walked past. my friends kept bothering me to dm him and i was like noooo, but then i got one of those moods where im like 'f it, whats the worst that can happen?" and i actually do it.

then we start up a convo and texting a lot, i get to know all the weird stuff that the vbc does and we listen to each other rant. like the whole mutual pining scene, always on their phone, smiling at texts. and my friends and the vbc are like 'what tf is happening, theyre actually smiling??? often??'. and then the dream ended because the rain outside was too loud rip, i got the vibes that it was right before the confession, i woulda liked to experience that.

also weird question, but have u dreamed in art?? like in an anime art style or any other style? because idk if its just me who sometimes does this, i had this really vivid dream like a month ago which was based around attack on titan, he-man, and colonial america which was entirely in a demon slayer art style and played out like an anime too.

lmao the first bit 😍 introverts unite LMODSIFJF YOU JUST WANNA DO YOUR PUZZLES IN PEACE (why are dreams always like that though. why can't they be nice. why does there always have to be something annoying happening)

OMG YOU HAD A YAMS MOMENT AHSDKLKSLD DINOSAUR TRAIN I'M - YES

yeah uh LMAo that's . totally normal im sure AJAJAJ we're just born with twitter accounts ,,, why do i feel like that's not unlikely to be a thing in the future.

okay why am i so invested in this rn shhh

MUTUAL PINING MUTUAL PINING MUTUAL PINING MUTUAL PINING MUTUAL PINING M

WTHJFJKFSD HKLAwHK Ff i wanna smack the rain :( i was so invested in that :( bro

hmmm i dunno if i have. i think i've dreamt in like - a 3D typa world before? instead of realistic everything is sorta video-game-y if that makes sense? that's an interesting question hmm

tell me about a dream you had with characters

[fictionalrambles]

Shadowhunters Fandom Story - Part Sixteen

Submitted by @miss-shiva-adler​

Five Fave Fics:

1. Your Love is Payment Enough by @tobythewise​ I don’t know what else to say, I have religiously followed this fic from the first day of posting. It really made me fall in love with Toby’s writing, every word was a treat and really made me just fall in love ? I don’t know what else to say. Toby is an amazing person and I am blessed to call them my friend. They have taught me to fall in love with omegaverse AUs and to be openly writing about kinks that have made me feel embarrassed about to write about before. This fic is the prime example, I love it so so much. Toby has made me feel comfortable to just write things that I otherwise wouldn’t even have conceived sharing with the world. The way Toby writes is a real safe space for me. I thrive on angst and tears and tragedy. But when I read Toby’s fics I know it’s safe, I know they will transport me to a world where things will be alright, writers like Toby are a beating heart in this fandom when you need a fluffy fic to go to. This fic has the right amount of angst that I can read and reread whenever and don’t need to be in a special mindspace to be for it. This fic is a gift that has kept on giving by every update and every chapter.

2. I've got a renegade heart (and it's screaming his name) by LiviKate

This fic was recommended to me by an Aro-ace friend following a discussion about Raphael’s sexuality and how to explore it in fanfiction while still being consistent with a sex-repulsed headcanon. This fic has given me a better insight on how to write Raphael and I take that with me every day when I write Saphael. It helps me navigate on what I want to include and not include in my own fics and that’s wonderful. I love rereading it when I can.

3. thousands upon thousands made an ocean by @oh-la-fraise-blog​ Team mortal!Alec for ever especially in a TWI! Au I love this fic so much, the wording, the way it’s constructed, it made me want to try things narratively. In so little words it got me to places and emotional places. I literally cannot even remember how many times I have reread this fic. Because it’s this just REALLY REALLY GOOD. I’m glad it exists, I’m glad how it inspired me. I still think about this fic often days or even months after reading this the first time. It’s amazing, it’s everything I want from a TWI fic.

4. In the Sin Bin by @otppurefuckingmagic​

I have to mention my first fic I read of this fandom. I was swept away with emotions and I loved the world building from day one. I’m usually not so interested in depowered/human AUs but this one made me like it and convinced me to read more of them and give them a chance. My primary attraction to Alec is the fact that he is closeted and I mean : such a mood ? This fic was around while I am still struggling with myself. This fic somehow helped me, in times where I wasn’t feeling nice or up for it or when I was broody. I was just able to tune out and read this and it made me feel so much better about things; things being myself, my gender etc. I’m glad it exists, I’m glad this is a to go fic that made me feel nice and good. AND THERE ARE ANGST SCENES THAT LIKE I STILL REMEMBER UNTIL THIS DAY AND ITS BEEN LIKE OVER A YEAR NOW.

5. as your sun sets (i know you in bleary-eyed 3AM) 

by @the-prophet-lemonade​

I don’t know where to begin and where to start, this fic, the writing style. I have yet to review this fic but I feel like I can’t because there is so much that just feels perfect to me. If I ever had writing goals I think it’s theprophetlemonade’s writing style. I can only wish to write this good. I hope to get there eventually and this fic is a motivation to keep going and hoping that I’ll be able to develop my own style and to continue writing even tho the words are sometimes not doing THEIR THING. About this fic I only have this to say : I almost never read Gen or T rated fics that are over 3k, I just don’t, unless very special circumstances. These were super special circumstances, I really needed a long ass fic that was a sense8 AU and I was desperate. So I tried this fic any way. AND OH DAMN (just imagine me capslocking the rest of what I’m about to say)  this fic changed how I saw fanfiction as a whole; this fic also kept elements that I really enjoyed in the show, Jace and Alec’s relationship, the background actual polyam Clacemon a pure delight. The yearning both as a reader and Alec for wanting to meet Magnus. It was so good, so.fuckng.good.oh.my.god. I can’t explain how much this fic just made me want to be better at writing as a whole; I’m thankful it exists, I’m thankful it’s there and that I can read it as many times I want. I love the character building, I love the entirety of it. The way the cluster manifests, how it feels natural and how the narrative flows, the fluidity of it, the way that this whole fic is constructed is a pure work of art. I weep as much as I am elated for it.

~

Tell me what writing for this fandom means to you.

I don’t know where to begin, through this fandom I have found a whole set of friends that mean the world to me as of today. I have wanted to and definitely have improved my writing thanks to this fandom. I have tried things I wouldn’t have even imagined writing before. There are things I was able to try and still want to try and even if I don’t have a steady audience of people I still want to write what interests me above all. Ships that I find interesting to try out to explore. AUs that are maybe a bit over the top or are a bit silly but I feel confident enough to actually share these with readers because I am finally starting to believe that there is readership for what I write.

The first thing I did was cater to my fandom experience and this has just melted out to the better. I’m so grateful. So grateful there are safe spaces for me out there with my main, rare-pairs and even controversial ships. I have tried different styles still in pursuit of getting better and to improve my writing, I’d like to believe and have improved. These characters, oh do I love them all so much. All these characters have potential and made me help focusing on improving them through plot. I have so much improved in my writing when it’s about atmosphere and emotions. And godamned even dialogues (dialogues and fighting scenes are the bane of my existence). This is a gift that I just cherish beyond everything else out there. Next to the friends I have made out there of course.

I also finally wrote my first actual long fic and finished it ? it’s an achievement I’m proud off and will be forever proud of. A bit longer than a year ago I was somewhere really deep, very deep, mentally. I was able to pick myself up again and do what I really love doing best, and that’s writing. I have this fandom to thank for that.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #293

“your head upon a stick would look really sick, but they would call me crazy for the way i spoke to it”

Hey bitch, what's your fucking name? What a start, jc lmao. Brittany. What color are your nails? They're not painted. Last time you got some ass? Well this survey's gonna be a journey. Many years ago. Do your parents like your style/music choices? Yeah, at least most of it. Some music my mom really doesn't like or just hates, while I can't even imagine Dad's reaction to some bands I enjoy. Ever seen your parents make out? tbh would rather slam my ankle on a Razor scooter. What's your dream height and weight? Forget about my height, if I could just be at least 120 again... Do you put your hair up a lot or down? It's too short to put up. Most of the time do you straighten or curl your hair? Neither. What do you do when your house loses power? Light a bunch of candles and carry flashlights. What piercing do you hate? I'm not a fan of cheek piercings. Were you raised in a religious house? Yes. I grew up going to Sunday school and church, even though I hated both. Do your parents get mad when you're on the computer for hours? Gah... it was a very, very big source of argumentative fuel between Mom and me all the way up to my late teenage years when she just gave up; now, it's to be expected and is completely "normal." I always wanted to be on the computer once I was introduced to it; she tried to limit my time on it, and it was without fail what she would take away whenever I was grounded. I'd even sneak onto it when I wasn't allowed to if she wasn't home and Dad was in their room. My mom really did try to keep me from being hooked on technology, she really did, it just didn't work, but dear god I wish it did. I just about turn into a caveman without some form of it, and it's pretty pathetic. Dad meanwhile has never really cared much, but he'd make a comment here and there that would make me self-conscious about it. Have you ever been asked for a nude picture? No, and guess who would be ignored for the rest of their lives if they did. It's so fucking disrespectful and objectifying to me. If someone wants to send a partner something like that by their own volition, that's cool, but asking, that just seems incredibly rude to me and turns the person into an object of lust. Ever been so scared you pissed? Caaan't say I have. Can you watch scary movies at night and not be scared? Yeah, they've never really fazed me. Last reason you got your cell taken away? I actually don't know if that's ever happened, given the aforementioned computer thing. I was never hooked on my phone. Could you handle working on a farm? Nooooo, that is way too much physical exertion. Have you ever been attacked by an animal? No. Have you ever had to put an animal to sleep? ugh Do you have a favorite type of firework? Well, visually I really just like the big colorful ones, but I don't endorse the use of fireworks anymore. Some animals literally die from fear, they can be seriously upsetting to veterans with PTSD (you could have one in your neighborhood and never know you indirectly gave them a panic attack), and they're a large source of litter. Where would/did you get your first tattoo? My right wrist. What's your favorite kind of pet? Snakes. Favorite dinosaur? Spinosaurus is obviously the coolest. It's always been my fave. How many pets do you have? Sigh, just two. Our landlord doesn't want us to get anymore pets than what we came in with. What were two of your favorite Disney movies as child? The Lion King and Finding Nemo. They're still my favorite Disney movies. When carving pumpkins, how do you decide what you're going to do? I haven't carved a pumpkin in years... so idk. Do you own any art supplies? Some, yeah. Do you believe you have a higher IQ than most? Definitely not. What is the name of the doctor that delivered you? I have no clue. Mom knows him for sure because she's mentioned him from my childhood, but I don't. Have you ever seen a Lamborghini in person? Hunny, I live in rural North Carolina. You don't see that level of bougie here lmao. Shane Dawson: funny or annoying? I honestly think he's fucking hilarious. I just have such conflicting feelings about him after "the drama," hearing so many people's opinions (particularly from those who know him so well, like his fiance and Ryland's sister), fact checking, audio cutting and mixing, the whole "people change" philosophy... I don't know. When you have a container of Neapolitan ice cream, what flavor do you leave for last? I ain't touchin' strawberry. Gross. If you could choose to have any superpower ever, what would you pick? I'd wanna be a shapeshifter/druid. What would you be more embarrassed to buy: sex toys or adult diapers? Yikes, sex toys. Given my age, I'd say if I bought adult diapers, people would assume they weren't for me. I'm awkward enough with all things relating to sex to begin with, so. What’s the biggest animal you’ve ever killed? Yo wtf I never have and never will (intentionally) kill an animal. Well, correction: I've killed bugs before, the biggest probably being some spider or something, but I really try to avoid this now. Could you win the Hunger Games? lol hell to the fuck no, have you seen me??? For you, would getting amnesia be a good thing? ... Maybe? Not saying I wanna find out, though. Have you ever been punched in the face? No, plan on keeping it that way. Is morality universal or relative? I question this myself. Who is your favorite late night talk show host? I don't have one. Where do you put your keys when you get home? They stay in my purse. Do you prefer hot coffee or iced coffee? Neither. The sheer variety of questions relating to coffee and tea in surveys boggles my mind, always feel left out that I can't answer 'em lmao. What’s your phone background picture? My lock screen is this pretty, soft aesthetic screen that has "i am strong, i am loved, i am enough" written in the center. I've really needed it for my mental health lately. My home screen is some meerkats. I know, can you believe neither are currently Mark? Have you ever seen a snake in the wild? Plenty. How do you cope with anxiety? Deep breathing, mindfulness and grounding exercises, confiding in my mom, listening to music (usually my favorite calm, instrumental soundtracks, like from the Silent Hill franchise - particularly the second game! - or Shadow of the Colossus), try to nap, play a game as a distraction, watch my favorite YouTubers (typically something funny)... I'm lucky to have learned a lot. Now, if only I could cope with social anxiety... What was the last takeout food you ate? Oh Jesus, how embarrassing is this timing, seeing as it was one of my unhealthiest fast food orders: Son of the Baconator and Baconator fries from Wendy's. It was so fuckin good tho. Who makes you laugh the most? My friend Girt. What does a successful relationship look like to you? One with great communication and total honesty, and when you are able to build each other up and bring out the best in your partner. It's also imperative for you to feel safe being your authetic safe for me to consider it "successful." What do you like to put on your baked potato? "Salt, pepper, butter, cheese, bacon bits." <<<< That's how we do it, lads. What was the most memorable birthday you’ve had? My 16th, but not for good reasons. Would you rather go to the beach or the mountains? That's easy as hell, mountains. I don't like the beach. Do you look in the mirror before you leave the house? Yeah. Not gonna like what I see no matter what, but I'd like to make sure I don't look worse whan what's normal. Have you ever seen someone quit their job in a dramatic way? No. What do you like to dip your fries in? It varies between ketchup and honey mustard. What’s your favorite kind of museum? Science. Do you believe in alternate universes? Nah, I don't think so. Whose house did you last visit? My older sister's. What games do you play on your smart phone? Mostly just Pokemon GO nowadays. I haven't touched Dragons of Atlantis in a long time... Do you know anyone who is colorblind? Jason's older brother is red/green colorblind, I think? Are you the youngest, middle or eldest child in your family? Middle. What’s something you’ve been meaning to do but keep putting off? Ugh, I need to finish decorating my damn room... Got most of the stuff on the walls now, but it's still pretty skeletal in self expression. My motivation is abysmal. Have you ever flown a kite? Oh yeah, I loved to fly a kite with Dad as a little kid when the tobacco field just across the road was barren. Who was the last person you talked about sex/relationships with? My doctor. How many brothers does your father have? I'm almost certain he doesn't have one, just one sister. Do you think you act older or younger than your actual age? It depends on the situation. When it comes to "adulting," I don't have a fuckin clue what I'm doing. I doubt anyone would believe I'm a month shy of 25. In terms of general maturity, I think I act my age, if not older. When was the last time you swam in a pool? It's been years. What are your parents' views on your relationships? Mom is always very supportive so long as they treat me right; she's taken to all my previous partners very well and treated them like family, too. My dad is also supportive as long as I'm treated properly and happy. Is your best friend dating anyone? No. Have you ever babysat before? Twice, but not really willingly. Way too stressful. Do you delete pictures of you and your exes off of Facebook? It took a very, very long time, but all pictures with Jason are forever deleted. Ever had a huge crush on someone who still doesn’t know? Not a huge crush, no. Ever watched porn? No. You do you, but I don't see the appeal of watching some random people fuck. Ever performed in a talent show? No. Would you audition for a reality talent competition? Nope. How many celebrity crushes have you had? I'd say Jesse McCartney, Link Neal, and Mark Fischbach are my only BIG celeb crushes I've had. How many non-celebrity crushes have you had? I dunno, don't feel like reaching back and counting. Ever been compared to a celebrity? Not visually, but with my adoration of animals. Have any embarrassing pictures on Facebook? Oh, I'm sure. None that are horribly embarrassing though, or else I would have deleted them. Ever seen a therapist? I've regularly seen a therapist since the 6th grade. Ever purposely ignored a text? Yep. A Facebook message? Sure have, when I was beyond done arguing with a former friend. A friend request? No, I just decline or accept it. My page is private, so you can't see my activity, and it's not like they get notified if it's declined, Would you say you read into things too much? I am the fucking sovereign of this. If you turned out exactly like your mom would you be pleased? I love my mom to death, but no. I'd be disappointed. Ever had a credit card denied? I've never had one in the first place. Ever had the lead in a play? No. I do remember though in elementary school, I was real bummed that I wasn't Snow White for one we did for Music class. What about a solo in a concert? Never been in a concert. Would it bother you if you found out that your mother was pregnant? Well. One, she's long past menopause. Two, because of ovarian cancer, she had all those organs removed. So, that would be impossible. Have you ever had a threesome? No; I'm personally strictly monogamous and would feel it to be disloyal, even if my parnter was okay with it. What's the last game you used dice for? Not a clue. Are you interested in surfing at all? Have you ever been? No. What brand of bottled water do you prefer? Essentia. What is your favorite type of bird? Barn owls. What is your favorite chocolate candy? motherfuckin REESE'S Have you ever been called a racial slur? No, considering I'm Caucasian. Why did you last stand in line? I was at the doctor's office, I think? What is your favorite pirate movie? /shrug What is your favorite character from Orange Is the New Black? I've never watched it. What was the most unsettling film you’ve seen? Watching the ending to Paranormal Entity was VERY uncomfortable. It was a decently scary movie, but the ending was seriously intense. When was the last time you were snooping, and found something you wish you hadn’t? I don't recall. Which celebrity or band has the worst fan base? I don't know. What are you interested in that most people aren’t? The sheer degree of my love for meerkats would definitely be missed by probably most people. What smartphone feature would you actually be excited for a company to implement? I dunno. Anything I could think of, the most current products probably already have and I'm just uninformed of them. Like, I use a Tracfone lmao. What’s something people don’t worry about but really should? Their plastic usage and disposal. I'm certainly no saint when it comes to plastic either, but I try to do all I can. What movie quotes do you use on a regular basis? Hm, ARE there any? Do you think that children born today will have better or worse lives than their parents? This depends on what you consider "better" and "worse." Environmentally, I honestly don't think mankind can maintain itself for that many more generations at the rate we're currently at, so that's probably just gonna keep getting worse. On the other hand, advances in medicine and things like that will certainly continue to improve quality of life in that sense. Human rights are getting better and better. I do fear that we're becoming too comfortable with laziness and convenience, but I hope that's a decline we don't continue to venture down. What’s the funniest actual name you’ve heard of someone having? I had a college classmate named Apple. Which charity or charitable cause is most deserving of money? Oh, come on now. It's not a competition. What game have you spent the most hours playing? So. When you type /played in World of Warcraft, it will show you your total playtime, and mine is YIKES. Like, around a year's worth of time of pure playing since 2014, I think. What’s the most comfortable bed or chair you’ve ever been in? I don't recall. What’s the hardest you’ve ever worked? When I did WiiFit religiously and lost around 40 pounds in HS. I was in the best shape of my life. What movie, picture, or video always makes you laugh no matter how often you watch it? Oh, there's certainly something. Probably some Unus Annus clip. That channel was a fucking blessing and a curse all the same. If you could have an all-expenses paid trip to see any famous world monument, which monument would you choose? Oh boy, I'd have to think, but probably somewhere in Rome or Greece. What’s the coldest you’ve ever been? I'm unsure. Probably jumping in the pool as a kid. My sisters and I would nag Dad to put the pool up on like the very first day of spring, so of course it was cold, but as a kid, I didn't mind that. What’s the most ridiculous thing you have bought? Hm. What’s the most depressing meal you’ve eaten? Ha ha yiiiikes, struggle foods... I don't know, but I've had some. What outdoor activity haven’t you tried, but would like to? Herping, though I change my mind on-and-off about it. I'm not very into the idea of disturbing wildlife just because they're cool and you wanna check them out. I'd totally go exploring with a camera, though, and not actually pick anything up. If you were given five million dollars to open a small museum, what kind of museum would you create? Hm... I actually think something like an art museum for the mentally ill would be pretty interesting and educational? Even something that could build empathy. Maybe mix some psychology in there to understand conditions.

[mcrmadness]

end of year asks: 1-4

Thanks! :D

1. what did you learn about yourself this year?

That how lonely I am? No but, with all this pandemic and lockdowns and whatnot, I just realized how my life has been basically the quarantine life for the past 2 years already. When the first lockdown happened, people started to live “like me” so I was so happy because people didn’t have to go to work nor schools and my (online) friends finally had time for me too, so much so it got almost exhausting for me! But then lockdowns ended and I actually was here like “nooooo don’t go yet!!! :(” and realized how lonely I actually am, and how much the capitalism whatsoever actually eats people’s free time so that they just don’t have the time for friends. Not to mention if anyone is an introvert especially, they also need to make time for themselves. Lots of people were suffering from the loneliness because of the lockdowns, but no one sees that here’s actually so money permanently lonely people who suffer from loneliness when there is no lockdowns. And once those all were over, people forgot that lonely people even exist, as if it would end for everyone if it ends for one person.

***

2. best moment of the year?

This whole year has been a moment and not a good one lol. Okay I think the best moment was the Apulanta concert in February! That was so great! (And a week later I was to a Lindemann concert in Helsinki, that was just slightly before the pandemic actually started in my country so it was one of the last concerts that were still okay to arrange. Helsinki was also nice.)

***

3. worst moment of the year?

Now because it’s already December but it’s supposed to still be January? No, really this is a difficult question. I feel that everything has been pretty, like, “dull” but not in a boring way. It’s clearly hasn’t been the best year ever but also not the worst, personally. But I guess the worst moment was when the lockdowns ended everywhere and I felt so lonely as everything went back to normal and people didn’t talk to me that much anymore. Chatting can be nice, but meaningful and deep conversations are what actually feed the introvert in me and I crave for those and regular chatting will just make me tired and I can feel lonely in the middle of a group of people if I don’t mentally connect with anyone on a “deeper” level. And it’s actually really difficult to find such people from anywhere.

***

4. what was the biggest change you experienced this year?

I gotta say it’s related to my art and me as an “artist” - even tho I’m just a hobbyist. For the last 2 years I have been drawing and writing more or less (finally) after a 6-7 years pause from drawing and writing, so a big portition of that has gone to me kinda getting used to it again and trying to find my comicbook style and how I really want to draw, and I think I have finally achieved the “final form” of that. Sure art styles develop all the time and this is probably not how it’s going to look like forever, but for now I’m really happy with where I’ve gotten with it. I think it looks now how I always wanted it to look but before I just did not know what was wrong with it, I just knew that something was off, and only this year I finally figured out what was the difference between the old style and new style (I like detailed, really “polished” outcome but it can still look a bit rough and not too perfect! So it looks like it was quite fast done but in reality I have worked on it a lot and it’s perfect just because of that! :D) .

I also suddenly started hyperfixating on art video on youtube a month ago and have watched to many of them that I see art differently now. Now e.g. if I see art on my dash, I don’t just scroll past it with “meh art not my style scrolllll” but now I actually stop to look at it and I am interested in knowing how was it don, and I actually look at the lines and if it’s layered or blended and how did the person paint/draw it, and I try to learn from it too!

I also try to reblog art and photography I see on my dash if it really speaks to me, instead of just scrolling past. (And asking the OP if they are fine with it being reblogged.) Especially those with not too many notes because being an artist or photographer on Tumblr sucks and gotta help my fellow artists here. I can’t whine about not getting notes if I don’t give the notes to others myself, that would just make me a hypocrite.

[leftiswherethedoorisright]

Reflecting on poor financial choices

The two of you who follow me... Thanks, one of you seems to be as annoyed by Derek Landys choices for the SP series as I am and the other shares some of my aesthetic preferences. Neither of you probably care about long rambly posts about fountain pens tho, which this post most definitively will become.

I bought some pens since my fabulous dialog 3, which still is used regularly. I bought an Otto Hutt Design 07, an Omas Paragon and spent time with my uncles Meisterstück 149. Right out of the gate: The 07 is the prettiest, the 149 the most imposing and the Paragon manages to hold the title of unreliable bitch.

Let’s go about in the order I recieved these pens.

First, I bought the Design 07 in the brass finish with transluscent black paint. It looks sleek, modern and sinister. It’s glorious and I would take it over the Silver finish everyday. The pen has a distinct German feel to it. The cap threads feel better and smoother than some bearings, it takes barely two thirds of a turn to cap and uncap and they are triple starts. With a hefty capped weight of 63g and 39 uncapped this pen doesn’t feel like the work of modern art it very much is but more like it was designed to be a melee weapon for the nuclear apocalypse. The packaging, made completely in Germany, is very impressive, too, but honestly, I can’t be bothered by it. You get a pen pouch from leatherette, a polishing cloth which you will need, a branded converter and a total of 6 ink cartridges, which I haven’t tried because the only royal blue I like is Montblancs with it’s reddish sheen and proper deep blue. The Design 07 appears to come with a number 8 JoWo 18K nib with special stamping and pretty damn perfect stamping and decoration work. I luckily have one of the older models with the companys initials instead of the logo, it just seems more fitting for this pen. The hinged clip is plenty strong enough for the pens weight, even upside down clipped to a t-shirt, no complaints. The best thing tho is the way it writes. A hint of feedback, consistent ink flow with a medium wet approach, giving you a good balance between “Fuck your ink jet paper” and “Damn this ink looks good”. I really, really like it and think it can hold its own against something like a Montblanc Meisterstück 149.

Next I bought the Omas Paragon, mainly for the glorious art deco styling. If any of my pens looks as good as my crush, this one is probably the closest. Elegant, timeless styling with near perfect scrollwork. The looks are nearly as sexy, the personality wasn’t from the get go. You see, the previous owner really didn’t clean the pen and it took me the better part of five hours just to fucking clean the feed, piston and inside and a couple days later, while loaded with Pelikan Star Ruby, the ink didn’t flow as wet anymore, so I took it apart, found a beautifully bordeaux coloured glob in the one massive ink channel in the feed (unlike most fountain pens, this pen just has one truly massive channel instead of the usual two to three smaller channels)... So I loaded it up with Graf von Faber-Castell Carbon Black and now, if I ever join a mafia, I have the perfect pen ink combination for it. The black pen with its silver accents already looks like something from a villain of the early twentieth century and with an ink as black as Carbon Black (it really is light swallowing and barely shades as it is a proper black and not a dark grey)... Damn. Got more reliable to.

Now, for my uncles Meisterstück 149. He wanted to buy me my own Meisterstück 149 for my Abitur (German A-Levels) and 18th birthday (he really is far too generous but once he puts his mind to something it is next to impossible to stop him) but since my birthday now was over a month ago and we only today are getting around to making that a reality I got to spend some time with his 149 and damn... It’s 14K M nib really has slightly to slim of a line for a pen of this immense size, but it writes like a dream. It even looks better than the modern Montblanc nibs with only the outside gold and the rest plated in either rhodium or platinum. Maybe I’ll post pictures of it later comparing it to a modern 149 nib.

He also said he had Montblanc Royal Blue in it and I was like “Are you serious? Royal blue is a crime against humanity with its meager saturation” but not Montblancs. It is every bit as deep as I could have whished, really a rather nicely saturated blue with a spectacular hue and nice red sheen when applied wet enough. It and iroshizuku ajisai are my favourite blues. Both are undoubtebly blue but while ajisai seems a bit like ice, Montblancs approach appears to be a more of a welcoming blue with a warmer feel. My next love letter just has to be written in Montblanc Royal Blue and I will buy my own bottle of it, though I am not sure which Royal Blue it is. The packaging looks more like the one of my Irish Green bottle (a gorgeous green, really reminding me of my Ireland vacation and the green grasslands, woods and everything there) but its Ident- Nr is 105192. I can highly recommend it. If every royal blue was this good, I’d never have branched out my ink collection. Would have saved me around 300€.

Edit: Apparantly Montblanc just changed their ink flask packaging in the quite distant past and I recieved a bottle with older packaging. Still very sexy Irish green and Royal Blue

And lastly, my adventure with Graf von Faber-Castell Carbon Black and Cobalt Blue. I recently ordered some Carbon Black of penoblo.de, a small German online specialty retailer, which in no way shape or form know of this post and hopefully never will. I recieved a bottle of what I thought was Cobalt Blue since both packaging and bottle stated so. I called them up, was greeted very kindly and promised a replacement, then chatted for a couple minutes about fountain pens. It is so nice to speak to someone even more passionate than I am about this hobby... The replacement arrived the next day and I didn’t recieve a retourn label, so I was like “I am going to try Cobalt Blue” and was greeted by a pit of a black which would make Lord Viles amour seem gray. So, naturally, I ordered a bottle of Cobalt Blue and recieved another bottle of Carbon Black dressed as Cobalt Blue, called them again, spoke to Mr. Butul again and yeah, it seems that Graf made a mistake with labelling sometime ago and not every faulty bottle was properly sent back to Nürnberg. Really, this is the kind of transparency I want to see and this experience just proves Anthonys of ukfountainpens statement: “Customers (generally) accept that mistakes happen; if you step up and solve the problem, they can actually be happier with their overall experience than if no problem had happened in the first place.“ I am frankly flattered by the amount of service and to every German reading this I can wholeheartedly recommend penoblo. I look forward to recieving my correct Cobalt Blue now more than ever and I will be happy to send the incorrectly labelled ones back. If I don’t have to send them , I will be sure to find myself a local addict for them because I will not need 225ml of black ink in the next few years. I can highly recommend it for more sensitive fountain pens and lovers of deep and dark secrets.

If anyone got through this whole post: I hope you are blessed with the same stamina in the bedroom, while running up stairs and listening to problems of your loved ones.

[travellingmonk]

PART 1 - An Image That Predicts The Future 3 by Sunao Ari - Translated!!!

Now, to explain this a bit, I don't normally go out of my way for a doujinshi. (pain in the arse for me to translate with conversational Japanese and I am, by far, NOT an expert in the language.) However, this one I just HAD to know the story of and share. Because reasons. Fair warning, this is a Seiji x Touma story... where Seiji dies... and Touma takes it EXTREMELY BADLY... then dies, too. And the art style is consistent... but... eh... It's not comparable to Ken Mizuki or Lapis Homme art style. (to be honest, took me 3 times flipping through this, and the third time actually paying attention to the story being told, not the art style, before I picked up on the very emotional story that was unfolding. -_-U) So... yeah, if that upsets you, keep on scrollin' and pay no mind to this post.

If you're curious, then keep reading.

Now, to give you a VERY short version of these 3 pages, it’s a summary of what happened in the past 2 books (lordy only knows where a copy of them could be since this was released back in the early 1990′s).

Short version summary : Touma’s got a disease that’s landed his butt in the hospital. At first he lies and tells everyone he’s fine, but gets worse, thinks he’s gonna die, then goes all ‘Seiji! I love you!’ to which the blonde Trooper goes ‘I love you, too <3′. By the time Touma is well enough to leave the hospital, he catches sight of his boy on TV, severely injured, trying to whoop some Youja bad guy butt. Only to end up getting himself rushed into the hospital. Which ends up with the truth coming out that Seiji’s got cancer, has a month left to live, and life sucks. They decide to get married asap, with Touma giving Seiji a wedding ring.

Not long after, a new round of attacks from the Youja World (and Arago’s army) is unleashed on the city. Seiji knows he needs to be out there to help fight back and to form the Kikoutei armor, but he’s too weak and can barely move.

He prays / begs to Kaosu for help, saying he’d give his life if it means he can help stop this. Lo and behold, POOF! Seiji is magically made better, the Youja gate the baddies came through gets sealed up, all the bad guys are dealt with, and Seiji says goodbye as he walks into the magical sphere that will seal all of that evil away. Touma doesn’t take this well, AT ALL. He tries to stop Seiji, Shin attempting to hold Touma back, and, just like that, Seiji, the Youja bad guys, and the Youja gate are all gone.

Current book starts off by jumping well over a decade into the future with Shin, all grown up, with his now 8 year old daughter.

It’s a weird way to start this book, but we go from Shin and his daughter in the future, to back in the past after Seiji’s death.

Touma is not taking his friend’s / husband’s death well AT ALL. To the point he’s having violent nightmares, wakes up still being stressed / freaked out, and to where Nasutei has to use sedatives on him to make him calm down to any degree. Even then, he’s still in denial, and the others have to lie to him, saying that Seiji is out but that he’ll be back soon.

An exhausted Nasutei commenting (after he’s fallen back to sleep) commenting about why can’t he just accept Seiji’s death like everyone else has? Having Touma go through this is torture on all of them. Time flows ever onward and the warm weather turns cold. Touma gets past the worst of it, more or less, but is depressed and suicidal. To the point he locks his bedroom door, slits his wrists, and tries to bleed out. The others rescue him, get him to the hospital, to which, afterwords, comes back to Nasutei’s house where EVERYONE keeps an eye on him and makes sure anything sharp is locked away.

This stresses out everyone, and gets Shin, who’s been the most patient and compassionate of the bunch, to snap. Saying that Seiji wouldn’t have wanted his friend to behave this way, and that there’s no guarantee that if Touma WOULD die, that they’d end up meeting in the afterlife.

Things really aren’t made any easier when Kayura comes to visit and has news. Sure Seiji’s sacrifice was a noble one and did seal up that one location so no other evils, gates, or soldiers could return, but it’s messed up stuff to the point where any wickedness happens, a gate will appear and, well, we all know that the Earth isn’t the most peaceful place in the universe.

Touma gets upset, to the point he grabs her by the neck and slams her down onto the dining room table. Despite her best efforts, she’s unable to open the seal at all and reclaim Seiji’s body. At least if they had his body they could have a funeral and say a proper ‘farewell’. Eventually he releases her, then gets super depressed. One day while out on the the terrace with Ryou, a tree branch breaks and wallops Touma upside the head, giving him a nasty bleeding cut.

As his friends tend to the injury and stop the bleeding, Shin gives the blue haired Trooper a letter. After everything, Shin had claimed the bag of Seiji’s clothing and belongings from when he was in the hospital and, among the things is a letter addressed to Touma.

In the letter is a lock of Seiji’s hair and the letter basically reads ‘By the time you read this, I’ll be dead. Don’t be sad. Are you lonely? Are you alone? Go out and live your life. You still have one to live. Make me proud.’

That seems to be what it takes to snap Touma out of his mood and turns his whole world around. The next morning finds the Trooper of Tenku coming downstairs to breakfast wearing clean clothes, with the lock of hair tied to a necklace, and stating that he’ll be leaving the house soon. He’s decided to aim to become a doctor and to find a cure to the cancer that took Seiji’s life. (Line of logic here would probably be more like ‘if he hadn’t had that cancer, he wouldn’t have gotten so severely injured, and wouldn’t have had to sacrifice his life to safe the city. Hence, is all cancer’s fault that this happened’.)

Chapter 3 picks up in the future (or would this be considered the present?) with Doctor Hashiba getting called into surgery to save someone’s life.

The surgery went well. He gets praised. Then his mother decides to swing by for a visit. Half because she just won a Pulitzer Prize and wants to celebrate, and two, because she’s now got some time off from work to do so.

The only thing is, she’s got bad timing. This is Touma and Seiji’s wedding anniversary, and the anniversary / observance of when he died.

They have a bit of an arguement. She saying ‘I don’t want you to be alone’ and he saying ‘I’m not alone. I can’t love anyone else. Seiji was the only one in the world for me’. The conversation dies out when Shin arrives for a chat and Touma’s mother leaves. (And, yes, that IS Shin with the really long hair. I honestly think that Sunao Ari was channeling Shin’s early design from when the characters were still in developtment. Not even kidding, here.)

Anywho, onwards with the story~

Touma and Shin get to chatting. Shin’s here because, thanks to Touma, his daughter is cured of the same kind of cancer Seiji had. Today is the day she’s being released from the hospital and can go home. Touma asks if they’d seen Seiji’s inspirational statue out in front of the hospital. Shin has but his daughter hasn’t. She goes out to look? He sends her out to look? Not really clear on that, BUT, either way, she’s outside meandering about while the two men talk. The conversation is basically ‘everything changes, but it sure seems like Seiji / the memory of Seiji has never changed’. Touma makes an offhanded comment about his own disease and says that he knows / he has a feeling that he’s going to die soon.

Suddenly there’s noise from outside and, come to find out, Shin’s daughter (4 years old at this time) is out in the middle of the road. The two men race outside, with Touma being faster, and shoves her out of the way of danger.

Unfortunately, this lands Touma smack dab in the middle of traffic instead. And, well...

The headlights of a truck? ambulance? are all too familiar to the light that Seiji walked into all thos years ago. Just like that BAM!!!!

Shin rushes to his friend’s side and, understandably so, freaking out. (Pretty sure the pictures speak for themselves here. Also, TOUMA! NUUUU!!! I may be a loyal Ryou fangirl at heart but, TOUMA! NUUUUU!!!)

As Touma is dying in Shin’s arms, Seiji in angel form appears. Touma manages to whisper out the name of his beloved significant other before completely giving into death.

Is super sad. (DANG IT, SUNAO ARI! WHY MUST YOU HURT ME SO!? GWAAAHHH SUCH A SAD STORY!!!!!)

The story picks up later at Touma’s funeral. 

Despite the super sad atmosphere and Shin blaming himself for his friend’s death (’it’s my fault. I killed him.’ Shin, sweetie, no you didn’t. Your daughter wandered into traffic and Touma died saving her life. You didn’t do a thing! ~*sad hugs*~ ) Touma’s dead body had a gentle smile on its face. At least he died happy.

Around his neck is the same lock of Seiji’s hair from the letter so many years ago.

(Shut up, dun look at me! I’m not crying! You’re crying! Bwaaa~ :,( )

The story ends with Shin noticing the fact that it’s beginning to snow. In October. Too early.

He wonders if the snow is a sign that Touma and Seiji are now happy together, or sad.

Sunao Ari, I know it’s been decades since you made this story, probably the first time someone NOT Japanese has been able to read it, but I hope that where ever life finds you, that you’re doing well, are enjoying good health, and are no longer torturing Seiji and Touma. (not sure mah lil ol’ fangirl heart could take another book like this one from you! ^_^U) Well, that’s it. Hope you enjoyed the story and the fact that it was translated for your .... it’s not right to say ‘enjoyment’ here, is it? for your reading pleasure? ... still doesn’t sound right. ~*offers you soft tissues and a warm blanket after that story*~ excuse me whilst i go hunt down some cute pictures of fluffy kittens to console mahself with.

[franeridart]

Merry Christmas!! I hope you are happy, and have a good New Year! 😁

Thank you!!! I hope you had a wonderful Christmas and will have a wonderful New Year too!!

Anon said:aaaaawwwnnn the good ol' platonic (or not, depending on the interpretation) bak*deku

I’m not anti anything anon, so you never gotta worry about that! I have ships I like and ships I don’t and ships I’m indifferent about, but I’m a firm believer in the ship and let ship principle~ sadly bkdk is strictly platonic for me (I see them too much as sibs for it to work in a romantic way, at this point), but I do adore their relationship and the way Horikoshi is writing it TT^TT it’s def one of my favorite Bakugou relationships, such a wonderfully complex story 💕

Anon said:Have you ever thought about drawing Bakushima as different ships? Like, from different shows. Put them in their outfits and such? I thought that wouls be pretty cool. Sorry if someone has already suggested this! I thought maybe Black Butler style ? Fruits basket, Death note, ect. ❤

I have in the past drawn them in AUs inspired by characters from other fandoms, if that’s what you’re asking! At the top of my head I can remember drawing them as Black⭐Star and Tsubaki from Soul Eater, Doumeki and Watanuki from xxxHolic and Jacuzzi and Nice from Baccano!, but I’m sure those are not the only ones... I’m never against that sort of AUs, if you have anything you’d like to see ask and I’ll see if I know the fandom you’re thinking about! :D

Anon said://squints// did your.... Did your lineart imPROVE??? holy maples Fran ur killing me with ur art I wanna survive my last 7 months of high school--

If you think so, then I’m seriously happy and glad to hear it! Thank you so much!! I feel like I’ve been getting sloppier actually, ngl, but I have been trying new tools for the line, so maybe that’s the difference you’re seeing!

Anon said:Gonna say anonymously caz' i'm too embarrassed to reveal myself for now, but I love your blog and art so damn much!!! Been following you for two years and you really inspired me to draw and really to stay in touch with bnha. Again, love you so much and hope you a merry Christmas!!!

Ahhhhh anon thank you so much!!! I’m happy I can make you keep up with bnha, ngl!! And I hope you’ve had a wonderful amazing christmas too!!!

Anon said:Sero with the long hair can murder me

He wouldn’t!

Anon said:what do you think of bakukamijirou 👀

I don’t ship it, sorry :( as far as shipping Bakugou goes, I only ship him around if Kirishima is involved - I do have a few Baku ships I like just for the aesthetics (like with Jirou, or Todoroki!) but I wouldn’t really call it “shipping”, I just like to see them next to each other cause their designs work well together haha

Anon said:Hello? Yes. Hi. Dave I love. Thank you.

I’m so happy to hear that!!! TT^TT thank you so much!!!

Anon said:Kamijirou cures my depression :3

WELL IF THAT ISN’T A MOOD!!

Anon said:Have you every considered a voltron au for your ocs? I know youve made a voltron au befores so i was wondering if you ever did it for anything else (i really love all your art have a lovely day

I’ve never, actually :thinking: the vld fandom is very scary to me so I try to keep away from it, ngl! I’ve also not watched past the first season of the cartoon itself so by now I don’t think I have the necessary information to make AUs based on that fandom, but the concept of my kids in space or piloting mechas is a wonderful one nonetheless haha

Anon said:Ah man I love dav so much. It makes me so happy when you post your sweet green haired boy. Day: brightened.

:sob: thank you SO MUCH!!!! TT^TT it makes me so happy to hear you like my boy!!

Anon said:I love and appreciate every variety of your ocs

THANK YOU!!!💕💕

Anon said:You: This is my boy. | Me: I love him so much and his hair and his shirt- 👌

Thank you so much!! His hair and clothes make less sense every time I draw him, but I have fun with it so I’m glad you like them anyway hahaha

Anon said:Hey! Who is he? He looks cool

Thank you so muuuccchhhh!!! His name is Dave!! He doesn’t really have much of a story, but he’s a uni student and likes music, philosophy and cats! He has a bunch of friends I draw him with now and again, and they mostly spend their time avoiding studying and being generally ridiculous :D

Anon said:Just wanted to let you know your art style is GORGEOUS. You're one of the few people on this site whose art always makes me excited to see it. I'm a huge Bakushima fan to begin with but your Bakugou is just...oof. lol I don't know if it's the hooded eyes or the undercut but you make him HAVE it!

That’s such high praise oh my god! TTOTT I’m glad you like how I draw my boy, he makes me so happy to doodle !!!!! 💞💞💞

Anon said:The two art post with "An unexpected sappy thought" and "Bunch of stuff from yesterday I finally managed to finish" were both flagged. i tried to send them to u, but couldn't. Just thought you should know if you haven't been notified yet! sorry that i cant be much help. (also the protest starts in like 10 min for me, so youre probably off already if youre doing it) sorry for bothering!

Anon said:hey your post (a colored fanart) of kirishima and bakugou cuddling w/ song lyrics as the caption got flagged, just thought i’d let you know if you didn’t see it :( stupid tumblr

These are pretty old asks at this point but I wanted to thank you for the heads up anyway! I have gone through my posts twice already and new flagged things always pop up, so the fact that you took the time to let me know was seriously huge help! Thank you so much!!

Anon said:hi i just saw your year summery-thingy and i just realized that i have followed you for more than a year now and i just want to say thank you for all the beutiful art i have seen !! you are truly one of my favorite artist i hope that you are well

Ah man thank you so much!!! I’m so so happy to hear you’ve been following me that long, it’s incredible to me!! I hope I’ll manage to get out of the slump I’ve fallen into soon enough orz meanwhile thank you for sticking around!! 💕

Anon said:Seeing your art summary makes my soul feel the urge to have your beautiful kiribaku art in a book. Have you ever thought about making a little zine with some of your illustrations? Or selling prints ;___; You're absolutely amazing!

Oh heck thank you so much for being interested in something like that! I’ve actually thought about something of the like, but if I ever did it would be a small zine with pieces made specifically for it! I have to research the whole thing a bit more, but in case I’ll reach a point where it’s a concrete possibility I’d first post something to check the actual interest in it between everyone! ;^;

Anon said:... Why BakuJiro tho?

Why not! They are good friends, have a nice dynamic, and their styles match together well! And Jirou’s so tiny next to him, I like the idea of Baku hugging her a whole lot as it might have become obvious by this point haha

Anon said:7w7r I see you there

I dunno what this is about but !!! neat!!

Anon said:Soooo,,, DabiHawks or Hawks single? I have curious for how would a drawing of them be made by you

I’ve said this a couple of times before, but I’m really only interested in dabihawks if Dabi is Touya at this point! I might change my mind if Hori develops their relationship more, but right now that’s how it is... and until I have more concrete proofs of Touya and Dabi being the same person I don’t wanna get too involved with the ship, in case I end up disappointed haha

Anon said:Fran, have you ever posted a selfie before? For some reason, I imagine you looking a little more like Kuroo from Haikyuu!! Haha.

I haven’t! I prefer being behind the camera instead of before it hahaha a couple years ago you would have been right! By now I have too much hair for it, tho lol also, I wear glasses and have a bunch of piercings and earrings that Kuroo doesn’t have (but should have, cause it’d be hot 👀👀👀)

[belphegor1982]

Got tagged by @kikabennet! 

when did you last sing to yourself?

Yesterday, since I’ve currently been awake for an hour and a half. Might have been either “Bonnie Portmore” or “Here’s a Health (To The Company)”. I’ve been putting a lot of shanties and pirates/sailing-related films soundtracks on to draw to (and hopefully write to) lately. (EDIT: Ooops - yep, wrote that yesterday around 11AM, so make that this afternoon; I hummed while I drew along with the first 3 Pirates of the Caribbean soundtracks. It’s so darn hummable.)

if a crystal ball could tell you the truth about anything, what would you want to know?

Who was the Man in the Iron Mask!? (I know better than to ask personal/family truths :S Besides, I’m curious.)

(putting the rest under a cut...)

what is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

Being able to speak (mostly) and read/write English fluently.

what is the first happy memory that comes to mind, recent or otherwise?

When my mum was in the hospital with my newborn baby sister, my dad would take me see them, and before that we’d stop for ice cream and a ride on the merry-go-round. That’s what comes to mind when I read “first happy memory”.

if you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living?

I’d go see my family and friends who live far away a lot more, and eat a lot more of my favourite things.

do you have a bucket list? if so, what are the top three things?

I don’t, really ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

describe a person close to your life in detail

The Best Beloved is tallish (1,77m - that’s… 5′10?), with dark brown hair, green eyes, skin that tans easily even in winter, and glasses. …and that’s as much detail as I’m comfortable putting.

do you feel you had a happy childhood?

On the whole, yes. Could’ve done without the bullying at school and the undermining of self-confidence at home, though.

when did you last cry in front of another person?

Don’t remember, so it must be at least a fortnight.

pick a person to stargaze with you and explain why you picked them

My dad, who used to sail with a compass. I don’t think he knows much about constellations, but he’s always willing to share memories, even if sometimes he doesn’t remember he’s told them multiple times.

would you ever have a deep conversation with a stranger and open up to them?

Probably. I shouldn’t, though. Strangers being by definition strangers, you never know where that information is going and how it might be used (possibly against you).

when was your last 3am conversation with someone, and who were they to you?

We both were tired and ended up going to bed around half past midnight, so no 3AM conversation, but my friend Sandrine last week.

if you were about to die, and you could only say one more sentence to one person, what would you say and to whom?

…I have no idea? I think I’d concentrate really hard on not dying :S

what is your opinion on brown eyes?

Why would it matter tho I have brown eyes and for the longest time I thought they were boring. It doesn’t help that brown hair and eyes are basically the default where I grew up/live. Then I grew up and moved on.

pick a quote and describe what it means to you personally

George Bernard Shaw’s “Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.” Life is complicated, all about balance between extremes and absolutes. Don’t trust people who tell you the world is grim and serious just because they are. And while getting the giggles at a funeral/wake is inappropriate, it doesn’t mean you’re heartless.

what would you title the autobiography of your life so far?

Wait, What

what would you do with one billion dollars?

I’d keep half a dozen millions for me (car and house debts), my family and my friends, and give the rest to social services, healthcare, and public services in general.

are you a very forgiving person? do you like being this way?

Ehhh… It’s complicated. I tend to hold grudges when I can remember why, but I rarely do something about it. On the whole I’m pretty “live and let live”.

would you describe yourself as more punk or pastel?

Neither, really. I’m too soft for punk, but pastel’s not really my thing either.

how do you feel about tattoos and piercings? explain

I’m too much of a wuss to even consider getting either, but they look great on other people. When I get a spot on my tongue I wonder how people with a tongue piercing manage to keep it, though. It’s very distracting.

do you wear a lot of makeup? why/why not?

As a rule, no, but if I work or if I’m invited somewhere I’ll throw on a bit of eyeliner and lipstick. (I should raid my makeup drawer, really, some of my lipstick cases are almost 20 years old and you should NOT do that.)

talk about a song/band/lyric that has affected your life in some way

In high school I saw a psychologist (junior high was NOT a happy time and the bad stuff just overflowed at one point) and went to an outpatient clinic every Wednesday. They had lots of activities, like painting on silk, various art stuff, and a band, and I loved that band. I was one of the only ones who’d request songs to sing in English. The guitarist introduced me to the Beatles’ “Something”, which I didn’t know, and to this day when I hear this lovely song I think of that guy who had a great smile, a great sense of humour and a great moustache (think George Harrison on Let It Be) who helped me get better.

list the concerts you have been to and talk about how they make you feel

Not to brag, but back in my uni days I did go to a number of them - K’s Choice, Coldplay, King Khan And His Shrines, M, Tom McRae are among the ones I remember. And a couple months ago I went to a rock concert with three bands one after the other. I love live music, it feels amazing. It courses through my body, makes me grin like a maniac, and want to jump and flail around just to vent the excess energy. And all this without a single drop of beer! (can’t stand the stuff :P)

who in the world would you most like to receive a letter from and what would you want it to say?

I’d love a letter from the national loto that says “here’s a giant check even though you haven’t scratched a ticket in years” :P More seriously, I LOVE receiving letters from my Internet friends.

do you have a desk/workspace and how is it organised/not organised?

I don’t really have a workspace. I have a desk, which has the desktop screen, keyboard, mouse/graphic tablet, and a whole lot of mess of papers, pens, boxes, and stuff. I can use either that desk or my laptop in my armchair.

what is your night time routine?

Finish watching the movie/tv show, look at Tumblr a bit (and/or stuff on the laptop, like TV Tropes), go to bed, read a bit on my Kindle, kiss the Best Beloved good night, switch off the lights, and try to sleep.

what’s one thing you don’t want your parents to know?

Anything about my intimate life, thanks.

if you had to dye your hair how would you dye/style it and why?

I experimented a bit with henna back in the day, but generally I just have haircuts (I have too little hair to risk harming it). I’d like some reddish highlights one day, though.

pick five people to go on an excursion with you. who would you pick and where would you go/what would you do?

Eehhh... I’d rather stay at home and chill :P Okay, I’d take the Best Beloved and my friends Melody, Nico, Sandrine, and Aldric, and head to Marquèze. (wish their website had an English version, it’d be better.) It’s an ecomuseum about local life in the early 1800s/early 1900s, with preserved traditional houses and people showing skills like dyeing fabric, shepherding, making flour (there’s a watermill) and all sorts of cakes and bread and snacks, and an entire day isn’t too much to visit everything.

name three wishes and why you wish for them

I wish:

I had a decently-paying job from home,

my friend Sandrine’s mum were/will be all right (don’t ask),

we had the house extension built already

what is the best halloween costume you have ever put together? if none, make one up

We didn’t have Halloween when I was growing up, it really only started to be a thing in earnest a decade or two ago. Although... One time when we lived in Bordeaux, the Best Beloved and I were invited to a housewarming party on Halloween, so people would wear costumes. I went as a witch, with a long black skirt, long-sleeve thing with black lace (-ish), long black and white wig, and of course black lipstick and lots of black around the eyes. The Best Beloved had made a cloak, a scythe of sorts with cardboard and foil, and had a scary death head mask on. We didn’t have a car and the friend lived in Saint-Médard (which is relevant), so we had to ask around the bus drivers for which bus went there.

So picture the two of us dressed as we were, mask and all, well after dark, asking around for the “S&M” bus. Yep :P (People stared at us during the ride, and unlike the Best Beloved, I didn’t have the luxury of a mask to hide my laughter...)

what’s the worst thing you’ve ever done while drunk or high?

The only time I got slightly tipsy I went a little pink and apparently talked a little louder than usual. I’ve never got drunk (too afraid of stomachache later) or high (it took my mum two heart attacks to quit smoking and I’m wondering if she hasn’t taken it up again, I can’t hold a cigarette, tobacco or otherwise).

what’s one thing you would never do for one million dollars?

Hurt people, probably. If I wouldn’t do it for ten dollars I wouldn’t do it for a million - if you agree to one or the other the rest is just haggling over price.

if you’re a boy, would you ever rock black nail polish? if you’re a girl, would you ever rock really really short hair?

I don’t think I have the right face shape for that - my face is too round, longer hair suits me better.

what’s your starbucks order, and who would you trust to order for you, if anyone?

I live 126 km (78 miles) from the nearest Starbucks, when I walk by one the queue is huge, and the prices are well beyond my range :> But I’d trust the Best Beloved. He’d still ask me, though.

what is the most important thing to you in your life right now?

Being happy and/or stress-free. Also the oncoming Papa Bear Awards nominations in a week and the Eurovision Song Context coming up in May :D

Tagging @radarsteddybear, @rose-of-pollux, @truxi-twice, @myrling-art, @iorvethscommando, and @toooldforthisbutstill! :o)