#i started as if i was talking about hollywood u and then i pretended to realise i shouldve started with hss first

[hsslilly-blog]

im transferring things between laptops and came across the cover pages for that hss/hwu slideshow i did a while ago for my friends and that i never ended up posting on here so:

it was honestly soooo long lol. it was over 100 slides and each one had multiple topics. i spoke for more than an hour.. jesus

[ohbabydollie]

omg the schlatt x masc fem s/o headcanons make me go absolutely insane ckksjfksjdkskskksk please please please do more

LMAO i’m glad u liked them

everyone asks you what to get him for his birthday since you know him best and ted took you on a mini shopping spree which you were excited for!!

as soon as you guys were walking through the mall you stopped at a victoria secret, looking at all the lacy panties and bras before picking up a thong

“i think he would like this, it’s not his size though” you say before asking a worker for their biggest size

a bunch of stupid shirts with saying like “i ❤️ getting pegged” “must be on estrogen from the way my rack keeps growing” etc.

the biggest monster dildo you can find at spencer’s with a tube of flavored lube

of course while you got him a few stupid gag gifts you got him shirts and things he would genuinely enjoy

getting mad at him and saying you’ll shove things up his ass and nicknames getting more insulting

“fisting your ass tonight, no prep” “i’ll stick my foot up your ass, bitch” “shut up, that’s why your hole is fucking gaping” “move broad”

schlatt laughs at it sometimes, kissing you on the forehead as you call him a broad and wrapping an arm around your waist

when he asks for your food you feed it to him, airplane and all

if he’s struggling to open a bottle or something and getting frustrated you’ll calmly grab it and open it before handing it to him with a wink and kiss

yk how he was pretending to eat pussy in that one chuckle sandwich vid? you pretend to part open and eat his ass

when you two walk off together you kick his ass and/or the back of his knees because you think it’s funny

yk those videos that are like “when the 5’2 homie finally agrees to cross dressing (he’s definitely getting it tonight)”

yeah you send those to jay all the time and tell him that the height is slowly going up so you’re just waiting until it’s 6’2

along with other memes like that

if anyone tries to defeminize you he’s on their ass IMMEDIATELY!!

“she might as well be your boyfriend with tits and in a dress” some girl says laughing slightly “well she’s my girlfriend with tits and more femininity than you could ever dream of” schlatt says crossing his arms “not ran through either”

doesn’t like it when men flirt with you but finds it funny once you get tired of them talking about fucking you and get started talking about fingering their asshole and they grimace in disgust before he appears

“hey sweetheart” he says wrapping his arm around your shoulders “thanks for keepin’ her fingers warm for me champ” he says to the guy jokingly as you giggle

posting him with songs like eating by CP hollywood & suki

“fuck is this?” he asks showing you your latest instagram story “an appreciation post for you” you say innocently smiling

Silly costumes for bits or for halloween parties!!

schlatt dressed as jessica rabbit n u as roger rabbit!! you as a prim and proper doctor n schlatt as a sexy nurse, complete with the fishnets and fake syringe

u get the silly costumes n he gets the sexy slutty ones

your behavior gets so normalized schlatt doesn’t even bat an eyelash at it anymore

“pegging session tonight?” you ask him, grinning as he rolls his eyes “only if you’re in leather”

groping at his man boobs, ass and thighs

“goo goo ga ga, i want milk” you say groping at his chest as schlatt pushes your face away, annoyed

if he’s ever walking in front of of you, checking out his ass and whistling at him

nsfw!!

drunkenly going up to schlatt at a costume party and saying “you look so pretty in your costume princess, imma eat you out when we get home” before schlatt pulls you into his lap and telling you “we’ll 69 it” as he undoes your tie and you go red in the face

making out with him at a party, parting with your face flushed and a string of saliva connecting the both of you

the first thing you say, looking up at him with hazy eyes, “no homo” schlatt looks at you confused before yelling “ITS NOT FUCKING GAY”

likes watching you walk around in flowy dresses and skirts knowing the second you both are alone he’s gonna be lifting them up and having you sobbing for him

he loves taking you into a bathroom, lifting your skirt snd fucking you into oblivion

“where’s the big strong girl huh? the one that said she was gonna peg me, huh?” he asks with your knees over his forearms (full nelson) and making you look in the mirror, completely weak to his touches and unable to escape

“look at my girl when she’s all cute and submissive” he says grinning and forcing you to look into the mirror

“where’s that bratty mouth you had earlier, hm?” he asks while he has you bent over on a counter as he goes in and out of your cunt, making you tighten up on his length

is mean to you in bed but there are times where he’s soft with you, calling himself lucky for having you, calling you his pretty wife, etc.

aftercare is top tier, will clean you up and get you food or drinks, whatever you want

[idrkanymorelmao]

celeb crush

paige bueckers x oc (lara abraham)

paige seems to have a little crush on one of the hottest and up and coming actors in hollywood

pt.1

———————————

“welcome everyone to (podcast name)”

“im lara abraham”

“and i’m maya adams”

“guys has anyone listened to the (podcast name) new episode” said paige as she takes off her headphones.

“no but you’ve been mentioning it a lot p” “do u have alittle crush on the hosttt”kk says with a mocking look on her face, as the team laughs.

“no i don’t what are u talking about” paige says while looking flustered

“hold on i didn’t even say which one”kk says with a smile “i meant lara btw”

“i know who you meant kk” paige says

“it’s okay p, she is really attractive” ice says while laughing.

“it’s literally nothing her new show is just really good” paige says

“yea it really is” jana replies,

a moment later the whole group loses focus and goes back to what they were doing so paige puts her headphones back on and presses play

“how has your week been going lara”

“amazing actually, (her show) IS GETTING A NEW SEASON!!” paige smiles as she can hear the excitement in her voice

“OMG THATS AMAZING CONGRATS”

“kay awesome i’ll let you know”

“thank youuu”

“jacob must be so excited right” maya says with alittle taunt in her voice

“stop being a weirdo maya but yes he was” lara says followed by a giggle

paige started to feel a bit annoyed by that remark, she didn’t know that lara and her costar had something going on, than it hit her ,paige did have a crush.

she paused the episode and opens up tiktok(let’s pretend like it isn’t banned☹️)she’s scrolling aimlessly when she comes across lara’s account “Therealarabraham” she clicks on her icon to view her latest post

“hey guys, i hope u all enjoyed todays episode of (podcast name) please please please give us suggestions on who you’d like to see next, don’t forget to give us a follow on our account @(podcastname)… have an amazing rest of your day byee”

paige decides to open up the comments

randomuser10: you guys should deff get paige bueckers on there that would be a vibe😂😂

-view 500 responses-

user38393: for sure get ppg, we need that gossip

paigefanforever: i think paige would be amazing

kklover:we need to see kk,paige and ice on here

she didn’t need to see anymore,she was just hoping that lara did.

———————

“hey maya” lara says through the phone,

“hey what’s up”

“how about we get paige bueckers on the podcast, people seem to really want her”

“by people do you mean you?” maya laughs

“i can be people”

“yk what i really don’t mind, hit her up see if she’s down for it”

“cool bye”

“byee” lara says as she hangs up the phone. lara has grown a minor crush on the basketball star and doesn’t really know what to do with it. she’s tried to get her attention before but it just hadn’t worked, liking all off her posts as soon as they’re posted, liking her stories, even commenting once but paige hasn’t ever interacted back but they need her on, for business.

Therealarabrahams: hey paige, i’m lara i’m the co-host of (podcast name) and we’d love to have u on, let me know if your down for that

she hesitates before finally pressing send

hopefully paige answers.

authors note

HEYYYY, i just wanna clarify that ik it isn’t the best, my english isn’t amazing but i hope u guys like it!!!

[justenjoythegossip]

MEAN GIRLS, CONTROLLED OPPOSITION, “USEFUL FOOLS” & THE STREISAND EFFECT

There has been some controversy regarding my post about the Middle Voice and some misunderstandings that I feel I should clear. I never intended to cause any harm to anyone, that is why I never use mods’ name (not when I talk about Team Real or Team PR or the Middle Voice either) as my goal is never to attack an individual or a group of people. I just try to share my observations, to look past the picture that is being sold, question narratives, try to show the dynamics at hand and the responses that could result from it.  

Mean girls recognizing themselves…

Certain mods felt attacked by this article when I never had them in mind in the first place when I actually wrote it (which, I guess, is quite telling). But also, some rightfully recognized themselves, managed to gather around with their friends for a senseless blocking spree to boot me off the island. They have twisted my words, tried to discredit and ridicule them, which is a classic manipulation technique by the way. 

It has been fascinating to see that all that I wrote (and I wrote plenty) has been reduced to the very silly notion of… plants. And yet, the picture is so much more complex than that. And I have been very careful anytime I have written about Team Real/PR Blogs or the Middle voice to define those groups very specifically and with as much accuracy as I could. And as you probably noticed, I always use the expression “plants/trolls”. Why? Because, those groups encompass a wide range of different profiles. Plants are actually the small minority of the bunch while trolls represent the largest majority. But since trolls consist of so much more than trolling, I guess it is rather important to define who they are and what they do. 

Controlled opposition: a powerful strategy & a psychological weapon… 

* “Controlled opposition is any person or organization which appears to be on one side, but is secretly working against the interests of that movement… With controlled opposition, one organization can play both sides. Controlled opposition can also act as spies, feeding information back to opposition organizations, feeding disinformation to those they pretend to ally with, and deliberately instigating infighting to ensure activist work does not get done”. https://www.hegemonmedia.com/p/what-is-controlled-opposition

PR strategies tend to mirror the games we find in Politics, so we can often use the same concepts to explain what is going on. Lenin once famously said that: “The best way to control the opposition is to lead it ourselves”. Middle Voice mods, Team PR mods and even Team Real mods work according to those very same basic principles. Some might find it strange that I include Team Real blogs to the controlled opposition. And yet it makes a lot of sense because some key players from that faction of the fandom used to debunk the stunts Chris, Abba and their teams were “trying” to pull, and they also used to criticize Chris very vehemently, even calling him disgusting names such as groomer or pedophile. And yet, some of those mods made a very “(non)sensical” U-turn and started to ship the very controversial couple. Obviously it only appeared to be nonsensical, but the reality is very different. Those mods were meant to pave the way for the fandom to embrace them as a Hollywood power couple after initially rejecting them vigorously. If such extreme voices could come to “accept” them, then the casual fan might just do the same. A classic manipulation technique in PR games that include so many of it. 

Such tactics include plants (as discussed previously), who work directly for their teams and are meant to drive/sell certain narratives to the fandom. But what is particularly interesting is that you don’t need a whole bunch of them. You might only need one or a couple in each groups. That’s the beauty of it. The rest of those groups will consist of “useful fools”… 

By the way, important sidenote, some people (or groups of people) likely use different accounts to add more weight and credibility to what they are selling. Certain Team (Real/PR/Middle Voice) mods share such similar tones, voices and rhetoric that it seems quite suspicious. It might be coincidental of course. But again probably not. 

The “useful idiots” are very useful tools…

Plants are the original agitators and lead the way while trolls follow in their path. If we use the same concepts as earlier, they are the equivalent of the “useful idiots” in a controlled opposition. 

“A useful idiot or useful fool is a person perceived as propagandizing for a cause without fully comprehending the cause's goals, and who is cynically being used by the cause's leaders.”

So obviously you don’t need to be a paid plant to play the exact same role in those PR strategies. All you need is to be susceptible and respond to a certain narrative, not question it and then amplify it yourself. So anyone can be an unwilling “useful” idiot” without even being aware of it, that is what it so pernicious about it. 

And when it comes to trolls, they will respond to very specific narratives that involve any kinds of controversy or that will trigger heated discussion because they tend to crave the attention and the drama. 

The “Streisand effect” or how not to draw attention to an issue…

*”The Streisand effect is an unintended consequence of attempts to hide, remove, or censor information, where the effort instead backfires by increasing public awareness of the information. The effect is named for American singer and actress Barbra Streisand, whose attempt in 2003 to suppress a photographer's publication of a photograph drew far greater attention to the obscure photograph”.

From a PR perspective, it’s very often smart not to respond to a rumor (true or false) or to a controversy so that you don’t draw more attention to it. Especially since it can be quite dangerous, if your response to a PR crisis is deemed inadequate, it can have even more lasting damage. Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher’s recent apology is a good example of that. They didn’t grasp the severity of their situation and their frivolous response got them cancelled. Pure and simple.

It's true for Chris’ shitshow with this very problematic woman as well. No acknowledgement, no problem! But it’s also true for all these mods who made such a ridiculous (and stupid?) fuzz about being called out plants/trolls when they were never even mentioned by names. Good job on planting this seed inside the minds of their followers. Although I am sure some of them are very much aware of their tactics at this point. 

[winderlylandchime]

I come to you with 2x09(1/2), this is one of my favorite episodes and i am so happy that my brother didn’t disappoint (without his knowledge. Bc for the sake of the experiment i try to be as quiet as possible while watching) anyway: i came home from work and he was waiting in the driveway with the remote in his hands so he didn’t waste a single second: *the ep starts with Britin and the priest* ‘oh damn. Okay, i guess we are just jumping right in! Is he wearing a CROSS NECKLACE?! How poetic….is that what that means?’ *stares at the babylon scene and then looks at me like a kid on christmas* ‘can we go to a gay club? I feel like itd be fun? This looks fun! Look at them having fun! *mikey mentions britins date night* WAS THAT THEIR VERSION OF A DATE?! You know what? Makes sense’ ‘BRIAN IS TELLING MIKE TO GET BEN BACK? Oh i think this dude might stick around longer than david then, huh? Or are they gonna pull the hollywood gay triangle and kill him off?’ (Narrators note: i have no clue what the triangle is but he seems sure of it as if he learned it in school, i can ask about it if yall want) ‘Did that lil shit just say what I think he said?! Brian, i give you full permission to hit that ugly child even if they are your nephews..*looks at me all honestly* promise ill get rid of my future kids if they say stuff like that..damn i keep forgetting they have sisters’ he is currently not happy about Brians sister saying he got off scot free and is talking about the ep where Jack says he should die instead, i am not ready for him to fully meet Joan.

The scene with the church comes up. ‘Okay brian has no business looking this good at church…how hard do you think he’s resisting to not make a joke about him catching on fire? *looks at me* oh come on! You make that joke all the time!!..the priest is like a what to her now?! Wait, is that? Is that THE DUDE FROM THE CLUB?! OH MY GOD HE FUCKED THE PRIEST! BRIAN FUCKING KINNEY FUCKED THE PRIEST!!! Does this mean he fucked God? HE FUCKED GOD! Now aint that a way to tell religion to go fuck itself. Fucked by the “sinner” himself’ *he then pretended to tip a cowboy hat to Brian while laughing so hard that he has tears in his eyes* ‘of course Justin thinks this is hot. Attaboy. Wait theyre all having breakfast together? And mel is actually nice? And brian is nice? SO THEY CAN GET ALONG IM JUST NOT ALLOWED TO WITNESS IT!’ He is currently losing his shit over that lunch scene where Ted shows up with a boner and once again has tears in his eyes. *in the tune of sitting on the tree song* ‘Brian and Justin hanging in the loft, F-U-K-C-C-I…wait that’s not it, F-K-U-I…no that sounds wrong..F-U-N-K-G..*looks at me worryingly* oh god. The alphabet is all wrong. (I tried to help him bc this man was about to have a meltdown) no no stop, you don’t know how the alphabet goes (me:everyone knows how the alphabet goes) no, i rearranged it yesterday because it didn’t look right on that thing *points to a photo with letters all over the place that spell happy bday*’

Welcome back dear sweet anon and brother anon!

I want you to know that I first read your messages on a bit of break at work and had tears streaming down my face from laughing so hard that I was worried I wouldn't be able to be professional looking in my meetings.

I love how protective your brother is of you - already getting rid of future imaginary bigoted kids.

HAHA yes fucking a priest is Britin's definition of date night!

I am worried about what drugs your brother is on with this alphabet rant. Is he... okay?

[storyofmychoices]

Impromptu Vacation

[Ethan Ramsey x Ellie Shepherd Masterlist]

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x Ellie Shepherd (F!MC) Other Characters: Alex Spencer(F!OC), Thomas Hunt, Prince Liam (mentioned) Book: Open Heart (Book Two) -- after chapter 11

Word Count: <1,800 (sorry I know this is longer than my usual posts!) Warnings: Teen; a character with PTSD/survivor’s guilt *comfort/care* Prompts: @choicesmonthlychallenge: misunderstandings ; @wackydrabbles “It’s definitely … interesting.” (in bold) ; @choicesbookclub OPH2 Replay: (post) Ch11

Summary: Ellie and Ethan take a trip to a secluded beach as a way to help Ellie continue to process her emotions away from the triggers of Boston and the hospital.

A/N: Alex is my OC who is marrying Thomas Hunt (Hollywood U AU), an old friend of Ethan's. Due to her mental state, Ellie has been harsh with Alex, and Ethan's relationship with her recently. Despite it all, Alex is a huge shipper of Ethan and Ellie.

This takes place after the events of “In Between” and "One Day at a Time" (both of which deal with Ellie's PTSD.

This is a companion piece to my series Love & Scotch (an Open Heart/Hollywood U crossover).

Ellie drummed her fingers against the back of her phone as it rested on the bed in front of her. She chewed her lip, slowly lifting the device to unlock it. Little red circles with numbers that made her anxious stared back at her; missed calls, voicemails, as well as unread texts, emails, and various social media notifications awaited her. She ran her fingers through her chestnut hair, tossing it over her shoulder. She had been dreading this moment. Talking with Ethan about everything was hard enough; facing her friends and family still seemed impossible.

"Start with one," she whispered to herself. That was the plan she and Ethan had made. It was easier just avoiding them because then she could pretend there wasn't anything wrong, but they were past that now. Taking a week's leave was bound to get people talking.

She scrolled through well wishes and questions from Sienna, Ines, Naveen, and many more, finally finding what she was looking for—the thread of unanswered texts from Alex Spencer.

"Hi, Alex. Sorry for going MIA. Things have been, well, I'm sure you can imagine. I never properly thanked you and Hunt for all your help at the hospital. Ethan told me how valuable you both were. I was still kind of out of it when you were there. Not really how I wanted our first meeting to go...I know I've been appalling ever since. I'm sorry about how I acted and any misunderstandings it's caused. (I'm sure Ethan's filled you in. I know you two still talk.) I would love to go to your Bachelorette party if you'll still have me."

"Of course, I still want you!" Alex replied almost immediately.

"You're completely in your right to rescind my invitation," Ellie answered.

"You're not getting out that easy! You're coming. End of story. I won't hear any more about it. I'll have my maid of honor, Addison, text you the deets!"

The corner of Ellie's lip turned up slightly. "Thanks!"

"Can I ask how you are? If you don't want to tell me, I respect that."

Her mouth turned down once more, a sigh slipping out. She let her screen time out as she contemplated her reply. It would be so easy to reply 'getting better' or doing 'fine', but that wouldn't be a step forward. "I'm trying."

"Trying is all you can do. I'm here if you ever want to talk (about what happen or gossip about our men 😉)."

"Thanks, Alex. I'll keep that in mind. Right now, I'm just trying to keep busy during my leave and avoid triggers."

"OMG, Ellie! I just had the most amazing idea! We have friends with a vacation house and a private beach on the cape. It's gorgeous! Why don't you and Ethan stay for a few days! Get away from Boston! You deserve a vacation! And so does Ethan. Please, tell me you'll go? I can send you the address and get the code for the lockbox with the key!"

Ellie's eyes widened as she read the message. Before she could reply, there was another message with an address and a code, along with the name of someone to call if they should have trouble. "I don't know what to say."

"Say you're going to go pack?" Alex responded instantly.

“It’s definitely…interesting.” She fidgeted with her phone, unsure what to do. Her gaze shifted around the room, her eyes lighting up at the possibility. Could they really be so spontaneous?

Ethan scanned the caller ID before answering his phone. He was taking his leave well by avoiding anyone who he might find irritating, which was almost everyone. "Hello, Hunt."

"My apologies, Ethan," Hunt greeted him.

Ethan could hear Alex in the background; with her, this could be anything. "Do I want to know what for?" He asked a slight air of amusement in his tone.

"Alex had this idea—"

"You're welcome," she interrupted cheerfully.

"We have friends with a beach house near you—they're not currently using it—Alex is trying to convince Ellie that the two of you need a vacation."

"The ocean is very soothing," Alex added.

"Would you like to talk to him?" Hunt questioned quietly, but not quite quiet enough.

Ethan stifled his chuckle as he listened to them.

"No, you're doing fine, my Love." Ethan could hear her press a kiss to her fiancé. "Oo, Ellie replied."

"Sorry," Hunt stated. "I tried to explain you might be busy. I hope it doesn't interfere with your plans. She means well."

"I know she does. Honestly, I'm at a loss," Ethan paused. "I just want to prove to Ellie that I can be there for her. I know my track record isn't the greatest."

"All you can do is keep showing up. Don't let her push you away."

"I'm trying."

"It'll work out, Ethan," Hunt offered confidently.

"I hope you're right."

"Me too," he laughed. "Or we'll both have Alex to deal with."

Ethan joined in his laughter, knowing that he wasn't wrong. "I guess I should get packing?"

"Good luck."

A couple of hours later...

"This is it." Ethan pulled into the long driveway in the secluded area.

"Wow!" Ellie's eyes widened as she took in the stunning beach house they were approaching—picturesque didn't do it justice.

Ethan craned his head taking, in the view of the ocean and beach surrounding them. "Whose house did Alex say this was?"

"She didn't."

Ethan grabbed their suitcases and the groceries they had picked up along the way as Ellie punched the code in the lockbox and retrieved the key. Her jaw dropped as she moved inside. "It's even more beautiful inside. How is that possible?"

Ethan set their bags down and looked for the lights.

"We are clearly doing something wrong," she decided. "Any other rich or famous friends I should know about?"

Ethan smirked. He wrapped his arms around her waist, guiding her into him. "Should I be jealous?"

"No." She shook her head softly.

He leaned down, brushing a delicate kiss across her lips. "Then, perhaps I should tell you about the Prince sometime."

"Funny!" Ellie laughed lightly. "You're cute."

His face flushed warm at the compliment. He cleared his throat, trying to keep a straight face.

"Wait! You're serious?"

"Yes." Ethan pressed a kiss to her forehead, then retrieved the groceries and went in search of the kitchen.

"You can't leave me like this!"

"Unfortunately, I must. If I don't start the chicken soon, we won't be eating dinner."

Ellie's smile faded as he left, the large house seemingly dimming around her. She traipsed through the grandiose but empty rooms, the novelty already wearing off.

"Can I help?" She asked when she turned into the kitchen, finding Ethan already at work.

"Let me do this for you." He took her hands, noticing her darkened gaze. He knew better than to ask if she was okay. "Why don't you relax on the beach? I know the clouds are moving in, but it's still quite beautiful."

Ellie nodded. "Okay."

"Ellie?" His thumb brushed across her cheek, "I love you."

She offered him a half-hearted smile. Drawing in a deep breath, she leaned into his touch. "I love you, too."

"If you need me, I'll be right here." He watched her through the sliding glass doors as she meandered out to the private beach.

Ellie kicked off her flip-flops, letting her toes dip in the sand. It was still warm, despite the disappearing sun. She continued closer toward the water, turning back to the house every so often.

A gentle breeze rolled off the water, wrapping her in its salty scent. Seagulls squawking somewhat down the shore were her only companions.

Ellie plopped down in the sand, letting its warmth soothe her. She closed her eyes, focusing on the steady rhythm of the lapping waves.

Every time a lingering memory of that day tried to replay in her mind, she shook her head and told herself 'no'; she wasn't going back there. Each time she would refocus on the predictable melody of the sea's ebb and flow, letting it ground her, just as Ethan had suggested at the park. Her body rocked in time with the waves as she let herself rest and let go.

A gust of cool wind kissed her face, blowing her hair haphazardly with it. The sky darkened on the horizon. A low rumble of thunder rippled across the ocean, pulling her from the serene state that had overtaken her.

Ellie jumped up just as the rain began to pour down. She grumbled, turning her face toward the sky as if to ask 'why?'.

Her hands clasped across her lips as she bit back a smile. A light laugh crept out, growing louder with the storm. She stood, letting the refreshing rain cascade over her face, washing away the pain.

"Ellie?" Ethan called a few minutes later. "Ellie? Ellie!"

She didn't move. She just focused on the rain and the sound of his voice drawing nearer.

"Ellie!" He breathed a sigh of relief, wrapping his arms around her. "I was worried when you didn't come back."

She sniffled back the tears hidden by the storm, whispering softly, "I can feel the rain."

"Yes, it's pouring!" He rubbed her back supportively. "Let's get you inside."

"No, Ethan—" She brushed her thumb across his jaw, the coarse hairs causing a pleasing tickle. "I can feel the rain." She smiled, nodding to him. She had been numb for so long; she had forgotten how to feel. Even the warmth of the sun had been lost on her.

His lips crashed on hers at the realization of what she was saying, his smile stretching to match hers. The scent of the sea and the salt from her tears tangled with the rain on his lips. He kissed her over and over, not wanting to let her go. When their kiss broke, he rested his forehead against hers.

"Stay with me."

"I'm not going anywhere," he agreed. "Never again."

Ellie nestled into his chest, turning her face once more toward the storm. She listened to the hum of the crashing waves behind them and the distant rumble of the heart of the storm still out on the horizon. She shivered in his arms as the soaking rain reached her core, but she didn't move.

Ethan stroked her wet hair, holding her safely in his arms. He watched her silently, letting her enjoy the storm. It wasn't a cure by any means, but for the moment, the subtle smile on her lips and the glimmer of light in her eyes were more than he could have asked for. His Ellie was still in there, and he would do whatever it took to make her whole again.

Tags in a reblog, please let me know if you would like to be added or removed from the list. Thank you for reading!

[thatbitchsimone]

Never thought that Johnny was innocent fully but amber clearly was a physical abuser in a mutually toxic relationship. I don’t get why you would post her court looks like it’s something cool and aesthetic when she is a horrible person regardless

yeah i get what u mean and its understandable that u feel kinda ”yikes” about it bc it IS kinda yikes that i do that in a sense. idk this might make me sound kinda fucked up and detached but i post it bc its kind of a big pop culture moment and that kinda goes with the stuff i blog about. like ive posted lots of jodi arias, anna delvey etc content and the amber stuff kinda goes with that. since its celebrities i have this disconnect from it like u know how we follow celeb drama and gossip for entertainment/interest/pure curiosity and kinda forget that these are real people and not a tv show? its kinda like that and theres probably some psychological reasoning or phenomena behind it but we all do it more or less. im not gonna sit here and virtue signal or pretend that i have some moral justification for it bc i honestly dont like the only reason i have for it is bc its pop culture, everyones talking about it and it involves celebrities and a beautiful actress that turned out to be a pretty disturbed person who behind all that beauty and glamour hides some dark secrets and it plays into the whole ”dark hollywood” ”secret lives of the rich and famous” thing as well as the ”darkness of the female mind/gone girl psychology/female criminals” which are both topics that im super interested in and therefore put on my little blog. i dont support jodi arias for example (i absolutely think she belongs in prison or preferably some kind of mental institution bc people like her need real psychological treatment) but i sure am fascinated by her and her mind and that whole persona. i dont know if im making much sense but im just trying to be fully candid and honest here maybe i sound cold hearted or detached from reality but i know for a fact im not in the minority with this bc just look at our culture u know

and i also started doing it even more purely bc of ppl trying to police me and stop me from doing it lol like i dont like being scolded or told what to think or do and yes thats immature but im a stubborn rebelious provocative little bitch at heart always have been. im not gonna pretend that i dont feel sympathy for amber and treat her like the monster the media and internet warriors does when i dont actually share that opinion like im not gonna submit to peer pressure/go along with the popular opinion just to please others like no im not gonna fake it thats not me like i want to be honest

[shereadsandwritesformelanin]

The Baker And Her Actor Part II!

The Baker And Her Actor: part II: [The Dog Park]

Paring: Chris Evans x Black Fem!Reader

Summary: You meet Chris while making a house delivery for the Evans. He can’t get you off his mind, and to be honest you can’t either.

Warnings: profanity, sexual content, angst, but overall fluff!

Notes: I hope you guys enjoy! If you have request feel free to share those!!

Previous Part(s): Part(s) --> (1)

—-

Y/n’ Point Of View:

You wake up to the moist kisses your dog Haneli places all around the surface of your face.

The best way to wake up.

“Hey girl, good morning baby.” You say petting her thick fur.

You play with your pup entertaining her for awhile in your bedroom, practicing tricks and just goofing around.

“Hey wanna go to the dog park today?” You ask Hanlei as if she’d respond.

Even though she couldn’t talk you could tell by the way her eyes lit up she was fond of the idea.

You walk toward you small closet, reaching up to find something cozy to wear.

You decide on a pair of navy blue adidas leggings a black long sleeve you probably got from a thrift shop a puffer jacket and black scarf to cozy up in.

“Okay you ready?” You ask your pup

She wags her tail in agreement.

You grab her collar and clip on her leash brushing over her fur once more before locking the door to your loft apartment.

It was another beautiful fall Boston day. The way the leaves had turned a shade of pumpkin orange and fiery red, the scenery of the small town never seized to impress you.

You reach the dog park unhooking Haneli from her leash, pulling out a bag of her treats.

You thought to take this time to continue to work on tricks and commands with her.

 Seeing she was only 6 months old and almost as big as you, you thought commands would be necessary.

“Okay Haneli, circle me.’ You can do it girl, circle me.” You command holding her favorite treats in your palm.

Just like that she circles you twice, you throw her two treats. You watch her race to get her treats.

Playing with Haneli you couldn't help but recap on last nights events. 

You just couldn't wrap your head around why Scott Evans, of all people would not only follow you, but lurk on you page liking pictures from over 2 years ago.

Was Chris apart of this? 

You couldn't help but think it, I mean it was a possibility right? 

Unlikely.

You snap out of your thought when you laid eyes on your now bored 6 month old golden retriever. She wagged her tail waiting patiently to go at it again.

“Sorry girl, let’s go again. Circle me, c’mon you can do it.” You encourage.

You amazed at how flawlessly she executed the trick, bending down you give her the treat in one hand while petting her in the other.

“That was a good trick.”

The voice startled you. You stumble back a little clutching your chest

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you. I just noticed you and wanted to say hello.” Chris apologized

He looked amazing, how can a man look so good but so simple.

He even had on the grey sweatpants.

“Oh it’s no big deal, I scare easy anyway.” You giggle attempting to relieve some of the nervous tension.

Haneli interrupt,  breaking her way through your legs.  You watch as she makes her way over to whom you assume is the dodger Kiara had told you about. You both watch mesmerize as your dogs interact, doing what they do best, sniffing one another.

“So cute.” You say breaking this silence.

“Right!’ What’s your dogs name?” Chris asks.

“Her names Haneli.” You blurt

“Haneli, I like it.” Chris compliments.

You wondered how he knew it was you from afar. I mean the way you stood versus the way he approached, it was strange he instantly knew it was you.

Was it because He and Scott were potentially cyber stalking you the previous night.

Just ask him, be bold.

“So, how did you know it was me if my back was toward you?” You question head hung low.

“Your hair, can’t miss it.” Chris jokes mimicking the shape with his hands.

“Kind of wished my hair looked like that, maybe if I wore a bonnet.” He follows

You immediately lock eyes with him not sure if he was serious or joking, either way it was indeed hilarious.

You break through your nerves laughing at his adorable joke. You could tell he was only trying to relate and make you feel comfortable.

“Well we should get going, I have to open the shop for the afternoon shift.’ You explain. “It was nice seeing you again, for the third time.” You tease

“Yeah I guess are interactions are a little frequent, but y/n can I, maybe have your number. If it’s isn’t a problem for you, no pressure.” He stammered.

Was the Chris Evans nervous to ask for your number? Wait scratch that, did the Chris Evans ask you for your number?

You were definitely just as nervous as him, but you could not pass up this opportunity to at least be friends. 

“Um of course, sure.” You comply immediately

Taking his phone the screen trembled as you typed, you hadn’t done this is a while. It was so foreign to you.

For your photo you snap a quick picture of haneli, smiling down at her adorable face.

“Cute.” Chris chuckles taking his phone back from your much smaller hands. “I’ll text you later?” He says almost as a question.

“Only if you want.” You shy

“Luckily for you, I do.” Chris smirks gathering dodger walking away.

You felt your stomach churn in excitement, those damn butterflies were fluttering again.

His scent was intoxicating and his Boston accent was sexy, it was enough to make you crumble.

You hoped he would actually text you, with him being a big name in Hollywood you doubt if he’d ever been have time to get around to you.

—

Chris’s Point Of View:

Y/n looked beautiful today.

The way her hair was up in a beautiful updo, and her athletic clothes. Those leggings that fit her curves hugging her ass so well, she had a nice ass.

Stop it Chris.

Your outfit completely captured her essence.

To be completely transparent I had come here to walk dodger and get some fresh air, when I noticed she was here I couldn’t help but creep and watch for a minute, or two.

The way you smiled and laughed with  Haneli warmed my heart.

Driving home all my thoughts were intoxicated with y/n.

Even though I lived alone thinking about you didn’t make my house feel so big anymore.

Your warmth made it feel as if you could be here.

With me.

Gosh Y/n what are you doing to me?

——

Y/n’s Point Of View:

You walk into the bakery opening up shop, fiddling around to waste time until a costumer graced you.

You weren’t one hundred percent focused though. Chris had interrupted your thoughts more than once.

Since him returning to give you the tip, him possibly cyber stalking you, and now running into one another at the dog park.

It was almost like you couldn’t escape him.

But you weren’t complaining. For the most with all of your interactions he’d been nothing but the perfect gentleman and he was funny as well.

So far no complaints, not that it mattered.

A noise startles you breaking your train of thought.

“Kiara I had no Idea you were here.” You whisper shout holding your chest

“Uh, yeah I work every Monday.”

“Yeah right, I’m sorry just a lot on my mind right now.” You stated

“What or should I say who would that be?” Kiara implies wiggling her perfect brows.

She saw right through you ever time one of her many talents.

“We ran into each other at the dog park this morning.” You confess chest now feeling much lighter.

“What?! Kiara shouts. ‘Is he stalking you or something?”

“No he was walking dodger and said he recognized me and just started a conversation, no big deal.” You reassure.

Big deal, big fucking deal.

“Big deal my ass, your smitten like a kitten and he might like you.” Kiara suggests

“ I don’t know it wasn’t like that. I mean he asked for number but-.”

If she wasn’t excited it for you before she definitely was now. Kiara drops the broom she was carrying on the ground and her eyes go wide.

“Are you kidding me!’ Kiara trilled. “He asked for your number, like how reenact it for me. I’m you, your Chris.”

“Okay so basically, he just asked for number like a normal human being.”

“Lame! I want the juic more must have happened.” Kiara remarked.

“No it really happened that way.”

“Let me ask you this. How long has it been since you’ve got laid?”

A question you had to ponder on. It had been a while, you were celibate for about four years after your last serious relationship.

The only thing that had been down there were tampons, a few sex toys and a shower head.

“Since him.” You whisper

Kiara looked almost shocked although she was your Bestfriend you had been on a few spotty dates here and there she could have been sure you were getting some with those guys, but four years.

“Uh uh, text him right now and tell him you want to suck his white chocolate stick off right now!” She cursed.

“No!’ You shout. “Please use your lady mouth.” You demand

“I need you to use your lady mouth.” She says pretending to perform oral sex with the air.

“You’re ridiculous.” You chuckle

Just like clock work your first costumers of the afternoon walk in. you smile greeting the small family pushing the thoughts of Chris as far back as you could.

—-

Later that evening:

It’d been a rather long shift. It was a beautiful day so people were out more than usual.

You enjoyed costumer interaction and spreading your brand so that was no problem.

You were finishing the final pieces of closing up the shop.

Counting the cash profits and tips. You’re interrupted by the pinging of your phone.

You huff in frustration looming down at your phone.

Unknown number: Hi.

Y/n: Hello.Chris?

Unknown number: No not Chris. I’m sorry who is this again new phone so.

Y/n: I’m sure you’re not looking for me! Goodnight.

Unknown number: y/n, it’s Chris 😂

Y/n: Actor.. -_-

You quickly switch his name to a secretive and rather suggestive contact name.

The Captain: what are you up to?

Y/n: Closing up shop, talk when I’m home?

The Captain: Nah might be to tired.

Y/n: :(.

The Captain: kidding. Text me when you’re home, be safe.

You were shocked he actually got around to you let alone wanted you to be safe.

You felt like the flash the way you practically sped through your work to get home and text Chris. 

You were beyond excited, more excited than you’d like to admit but you couldn't shake the feeling that this was, this could be something great.

---

Getting home and settling down you took a shower taking your time, making sure to really exfoliate and moisturize your tired skin. You took your time twisting your hair, sealing in the moisture adequately.

You didn't want Chris to think you were desperate for him to like you, so you made him wait out for an hour, or two.

Finally at around eleven p.m you decided to send him a text.

Y/n: Hi :).

The Captain: Hey. Here I was thinking you forgot all about me.

Y/n: How could I do that?.

The Captain: Well maybe your boyfriends got you preoccupied ;). 

Y/n: Single. :p

Why would he assume I have a boyfriend?

---

Chris’s Point Of View:

I can't lie I was excited to learn she was available. Through our text and interactions I can tell she was a genuine person. 

After my last relationship I promised to let things come to me, yes I screwed up here and there going on dates who only wanted me for the label. 

Maybe letting y/n secretly slip into my life undetected was what I needed, what I wanted.

I want to take it slow to protect myself but something about her makes me wanna go all the way and quickly, and we’ve barley talked.

---

Y/n’s Point Of View:

Chris kept the conversation interesting, most of the questions asking about you and what your interests were. 

Knowing men you definitely knew he was figuring you out. Wanting to “get to know you more.”

You both exchanged questions back and forth.

He asked you about Disney.

You asked him about conspiracies.

You both dint want the night to end. The text were funny, serious, a little invasive. 

You felt like you knew Chris forever, when his named popped on your screen it warmed you heart.

So it melted when you felt your eyes grow heavy knowing you had work early in the morning. 

Y/n: Chris, I have to go.. I work early tomorrow.

The Captain: :( I understand sleep well beautiful.

Y/n: You as well.

The Captain: :)

And with that you put your phone to rest. Laying awake, lingering on his last words. 

Beautiful. Did he really think so?

Your eyelids falling you imagine Chris cradling you whispering those sweet words in your ear with his Boston accent.

God I think I like him.

---

Second Part! Let me know what you think below!

Are you liking their dynamic so far? Is it moving too fast or the perfect pace?

(please interact this helps me be a better story writer!)

Things will heat up soon don't you worry!

—

Tag List:

@toniilaney

[theartoflovingthomashunt]

Dx: verity[AU]

Catch up on Love and Scotch

Masterlists: [Hollywood U] || [Red Carpet Diaries]  || [Baby Hunt]  || [Love & Scotch HWU/OH]  ||  [#HollywoodHacks HWU/LH]

Characters: Alex, Thomas Hunt, Ethan Ramsey, Ellie Shephard (OH: MC) Notes: Goodbye @choicesmaychallenge​; @kinda-iconic​

This takes place a couple of hours after:  “the New Amazon”. Ethan showed up at Hunt’s house in LA unannounced and unexpected. Alex thinks he’s finally tired of running and is ready to admit that he has feelings for Ellie.

☆  ☆   ☆   ☆   ☆

Alex found Hunt and Ethan in his study each nursing a scotch in their hands. Her gaze shifted to the bottle between them. It was not nearly down enough for her plan to work. 

She retreated to the wine cellar, heading straight to Hunt’s prized liquor cabinet. It’s not like he would serve Ethan anything less than quality; but, there was quality and then there were the bottles in this cabinet. They could always switch back to what they were drinking as the night went on. 

Alex gently removed a 30-year-old bottle of Macallan. At least, it wasn’t his oldest or most expensive. And, he had a second bottle of it. It was also for a good cause. If love weren’t enough reason to open a 30-year-old bottle of scotch, what else was? She knew that with enough liquid courage she could get Ethan to admit exactly how he felt about Ellie and once he did that, he could never take it back. 

Alex paused in the doorway, watching Ethan and Hunt top off their glasses. “Perfect,” she thought. He’ll have to finish that first. We’re well on our way now.

Ethan sat in LAX the next day massaging his temples as he waited to board his flight. The laughter of the children playing by the window watching the planes take off was excruciating. Apparently, the head of the diagnostic department leaving when the hospital was amid a financial crisis did not send the best message to board members nor the community, especially when a new high profile client arrived looking for the now-famous doctor. If it weren’t for Naveen’s demanding phone call, he would not be up and about to endure a six-hour flight back to Boston. 

The ding of his phone alerting him to a new text message felt like an icepick to his head. He couldn’t remember the last time he regretted drinking scotch. 

“Goodbye, Ethan,” Alex texted. “Have a safe flight. See you back here in a few months with Ellie 😉”

“I thought last night would have convinced you to let it go,” Ethan replied. 

“Do you even remember what happened last night?” Alex retorted.

Fragments of images filled his thoughts, but most of it was a blur. 

“To start, we stopped you from drunk dialing Ellie,” Alex began. 

Ethan thought back trying to remember the previous night. 

He took out his phone attempting multiple times before successfully unlocking it. He squinted as he scrolled through his blurry contact list.  

Before he could press call, Hunt had placed his hand over the screen. “Easy there.” He took the phone out of Ethan’s reach. “Not like this.”

“This is what she wants,” Ethan pointed accusatory at Alex. “All she’s ever wanted was for me to tell Ellie how I feel. I thought Alex gets what she wants. Tell him!”

“Not like this,” Hunt repeated calmly, shifting away from Ethan. “All Alex has ever wanted was for you to be happy. This solves nothing.”

Alex watched uneasily as Ethan grew enraged. He poured himself more scotch, drinking it without hesitation. “She deserves the truth, Ethan, but not like this. Not when you’re in this state.”

“You did this to me,” he growled moving closer, towering over her. “You want to help me? Leave me alone. Stay away from me! I don’t need your help!”

“My apologies for my behavior. I was out of line. I was a guest in your home, you didn’t deserve that,” he answered, cringing at the memories that were starting to come back to him. “Thank you for making sure I didn’t go through with that call.”

“There’s more.” Before he could respond Alex texted him a video. His mouth fell open as he watched himself confess to everything Alex had ever said. 

“Enough! Fine, you want me to tell you the truth?” Ethan grumbled, raising his voice. His eyes burned with fire, through a pained expression. “The truth is Ellie drives me to distraction. I think about her all the time. Her smile, her laugh, her mind, her compassion. Every moment of every day, Ellie’s there like a cancer I can’t rid myself of. My body is flooded with dopamine and oxytocin at the mere thought of her. Of course, I want to be with her, but I can’t! She deserves a better man than I.”

Hunt interrupted off-screen: “Maybe she needs to make that decision for herself, my friend. She deserves a choice and it may just turn out to be the best thing to happen to either of you.”

“If I let her make that decision,” his voice wavered as he swallowed hard. His hands ran through his hair as he turned away from them. “If I leave it up to her, she’d choose me and I would never be able to stop myself once she did.”

“Then don’t,” Alex encouraged. 

Ethan stared at his screen not sure what to say. He definitely didn’t remember any of that, but the warmth flooding him now proved he meant every word. His hand caressed thoughtfully over his jaw wondering what he had done. 

“Ellie deserves the truth,” Alex texted again. “You both deserve to be happy.”

She continued: “Pretending this isn’t happening is hurting you both. Please trust me, Ethan.”

“Okay,” he replied.

“Okay, you’ll tell her?! 😲😊😍” She answered.

“You’re a good friend,” he admitted. “Hunt is a lucky man.”

“What does that mean?!!!!!” 

“Thank you, Alex.” 

Ethan took a deep breath and typed out another text. “Rookie, can we talk tonight? I believe I owe you a dinner and an explanation.”

☆  ☆   ☆   ☆   ☆

Perma tags: @lilyofchoices ; @simplymissjulia ; @mfackenthal ; @the-soot-sprite ; @virtuallytakenby ; @zeniamiii ; @kaavyaethanramsey; @choicesobsessed; @xjustin-ethansgirliex ; @caseyvalentineramsey; @trappedinfandoms

Thomas Tags: @alleksa16​  ;    @flyawayboo​    ;  @alj4890​  ;  @twin-skltns​   ;    @ab1901​ ;   @riseandshinelittleblossom​  ; @hopelessromantic1352​  ;   @thearianam​  ; @zodiacsign1​ ; @curiouslittlefreak​ ; @sharrybh20​ ; @awkwardambition ; @jodibo ;

OH Tags:  @ethandaddyramsey​ ; @mvalentine​; @edith-eggs1​ ; @burnsoslow​; @rookie-ramsey​ ; @messrprongs ; 

[ohtheseboysilove]

The greatess actress II [Ben Hardy x F!Reader]

sWords : 4, 000 K +

Warnings : mostly angst, fluff

Summary :  Things aren’t always as they seems.

Note : More angst for you guys, I know you all ask for it so here you go :) I’m really gmad for all the reviews and positive feedbacks I had for the first chapter so thank u so much ! I didn’t start writing chapter 3 yet but I have few ideas so if you guys have suggestions or theories I would love to heart hat !!! (i mostly replied to the messages in my inbox bc it’s easier to see them than the comments !!) Much love xx 

x Masterlist x

“And…action !”

You pretended to leave and Ben grabbed your wrist, tugging him against him rather roughly. You put a flat hand on his torso and looked at him with big, lost eyes.

“What—”

“Don’t say anything, baby” Then he crashed his lips on yours, sending a wave of electricity down your spine as you replied eagerly to the kiss.

The kiss was intense, slow and hot, during for what seemed like age. You weren’t really complaining. But it was the third time you did this scene because of the director who always wanted to add something and it started to be a bit much for you and your weak heart.

“And we got it ! Awesome guys !” The director jumped from his seat and went behind the camera looking at the screen with enthusiasm. “Everyone, take 5 !”

You sighed discretely and detached yourself from Ben, running a nervous finger through your hairs.

“Are you still coming tonight ?” You glanced toward the blond man, gaze falling right on his swollen lips, tempting and deliciously-looking red.

“Hum, probably ?” You scolded mentally yourself to stop looking at his mouth like a fucking creep and instead focus on his eyes.

Which maybe wasn’t better.

“Oh come on, it’s Randy’s last day ! He won’t forgive you if you don’t come” Ben winked and you chuckled awkwardly, ignoring the way the butterflies were going crazy in your belly.

“I guess you’re right” You smiled almost shyly, his bright and beautiful eyes were always making you kind of timid. “But I won’t stay long, we got an early scene tomorrow” You felt yourself become ridiculously red when he laughed loudly and threw an arm around your shoulders, squeezing you tightly against his strong body.

“You’re right and I’m pretty excited for tomorrow anyway”

You both walked to your trailers, next to each other, as the day was done and you couldn’t wait to go back into your own clothes.

“You are ?” You briefly remembered that the scene you had to do tomorrow was pretty romantic, lot of touchy-feely moments but nothing sexual, thanks god.

“Yeah, I mean…we’re filming at the beach so obviously breaks gonna be funnier than on set” He grinned and you silently swallowed back the disappointment bubbling in your chest.

“The beach, right” You forced a smile. Of course that was the reason why he was excited, idiot. He had a freaking girlfriend for god’s sake. “I will see you later, Ben” You waved awkwardly and climbed the few steps to your trailers before closing the door behind you, barely hearing his answer.

You let your body fall heavily on your bed, feeling exhausted and completely stupid.

It wasn’t the first time you had feelings for one of your co-star, honestly it was hard to stay hermetic when your job was to kiss a handsome and nice guy all day long. Once, you had to film for few weeks with Liam Hemsworth and god, the man was absolutely breathtaking. You had a tiny crush on him during the filming but nothing horrible, it didn’t make your job more complicated or anything. It was fairly innocent. You just enjoyed what a beautiful man he was but you stayed in control easily.

You also dated for two years with one of your previous co-stars, George Mackay but it was pretty obvious from the beginning that the both of you were into each other, which made everything easier.

You didn’t forget either when you had a tiny role in a big Hollywood move where you were only needed to literally make out with Leonardo DiCaprio. It was probably the first time you were so nervous to act, which was ridiculous because you barely spent more than two hours on set. But it was Leonardo freaking DiCaprio, your first crush had been Jack Dawson from Titanic so obviously it was huge for you.

No one probably remembered you from this movie but it was your little moment of pride. You made out with Leonardo freaking DiCaprio.

But nothing could compare to your feelings with Ben. You weren’t prepared at all for the wave of feelings which hit you strong in the face. Not at all.

When you first heard that you would be filming with Ben as co-star, you did some researches and found out it was the guy from the Bohemian Rhapsody movie, you were happy because he was an excellent actor in this film. And you couldn’t denied he was pretty attractive which could help as you were supposed to play lovers in this new project.

It started with an innocent crush, making your friends a bit jealous because you were kissing and holding hands with the new heart-robe of Hollywood. But it turned out to be much more when you started hanging out with him. He wasn’t only handsome. He was really funny, humble, generous, always making sure you were comfortable for any kind of intimate scene but he was also sensitive and not as confident as you thought first.

He was everything you could dream in a boyfriend.

You sighed loudly and rubbed your face roughly, heart beating heavily in your chest.

Why did you have to fall in love with an unavailable man ?

**

“We’re gonna miss you, big guy !” You watched Ben cheekily tussled Randy dirty red hairs, a large smile on his face.

“´f course you will ! But no need to go all emotional on me, Hardy. You’re still invited to my wedding in two months” Randy chuckled, his hand wrapped around a large pint of beer.

You giggled quietly as the two friends hugged again, both of them pretty tipsy after several drinks. Randy was playing one of Ben’s closest friend in the movie but he finished to do all of his scenes and he was now, sadly, leaving the set.

You took a little sip of your Margarita, only the second drinks of the evening for you as you hated being tired or hungover to film. Especially when you had to focus much more with your feelings for Ben, making your job much harder.

“Who is gonna kick my ass at FIFA now ?” The British man complained with a pout, making the whole table giggled.

“Literally everyone, Hardy” Joshua, one of the secondary actor of the movie spoke up, earning a round of applause from everyone.

You let your eyes trailed on Ben for few seconds. You couldn’t help but looked at him. He was so different out of the set, much more relax and you loved even more this part of him. His blond hairs were all over the place, slightly longer than before and it was certainly doing things to you. The way his eyes were sparkling due to the alcohol made your heart beat faster, this childish look was good on him, always wearing his boyish smile which made your knees weak.

And, surprisingly, Isis wasn’t here tonight. You felt like you could breath a little bit easier when she wasn’t around. You were so worried she found out you were in love with her boyfriend, it was scaring you more than everything.

“(Y/N) !” You jumped at Randy's voice and quickly tore your eyes from Ben’s jaw, pushing aside any thoughts.

“Yeah ?”

“I said do you want another drink ?” You nodded weakly and swallowed thickly, feeling nervous to almost been caught day-dreaming about Ben. “What were you looking at so intensely ? This little boyfriend of yours ?” The red hair laughed and pinched the blond’s cheek, making him groaned.

“Hey!” Ben pushed his hands away from his face and looked at you, an amused smile on his features. “I’m pretty sure she wasn’t looking at me, she see me enough all day long”

“True” You grinned and internally screamed. You could never be bored of looking at his pretty face. Never.

“So who where you looking at ? Did someone caught your eyes perhaps ?” Everyone turned, very discreetly, around and started giggling like teenager when they saw a quite charming brunette glancing over the table, few of his friends clearly teasing him.

“I see” Ben winked at you, finishing his drink with one gulp. “I think you should talk to him” He tilted his head toward the guy and you cringed internally.

It was literally the last thing you wanted to do. You didn’t even notice this guy until they all started looking at him. Your luck, obviously.

“I’m not sure about that” You laughed awkwardly and pushed few strands of hairs behind your ear, hoping for something, anything, to save you from talking to this stranger.

“Oh come on ! He is literally devouring you with his eyes” Ben nudged you gently. “And you were doing the same a minute before” He smirked and you were half relieved that he didn’t notice you were ogling him, not this random dude.

“(Y/N) ! (Y/N) ! (Y/N)” You wanted to disappear right now. You watched your friends cheering your name until you had enough and decided to agree, walking to the bar where you knew the guy would meet you too. “Go get it girl !” Randy drunkenly yelled and you felt your whole face turned red.

“Hey” You looked at the brunette, he wasn’t bad looking clearly. Curly hairs and cute dimples. Totally your type before you fell for a blond beefy guy.

“Hi” You smiled nervously and discreetly glanced toward Ben, looking for any kind of reassurance that he was maybe a bit annoyed by the fact that you were talking to another guy.

You couldn’t help yourself but wished that maybe he was sharing your feelings. Deep down. Maybe he was falling for you too but still confused with Isis. Conflicted. It was selfish but there were nothing you could do about these thoughts. Except keeping them for you.

But for all answer from Ben, you get a cheeky smile and two thumbs up. Clearly not bothered by the situation. You returned the smile, fake and smaller one before turning around to the man, your throat tight and your heart even more broken.

These feelings were clearly one-sided.

**

“You look like shit, hun” Molly greeted you as you sat, or rather flopped very graciously, on the chair in front of her, a fuming Costa cup in your right hand.

“That’s why you’re here” You snorted lazily before taking a sip of your coffee, not in the mood to talk much.

She glanced at you, feeling the mood immediately and decided to start your hairs and makeup in silence, humming quietly.

The whole crew was at the beach for the day and the place was truly breathtaking, a little creek mostly quiet except for the soft rolling of the waves. It was still dark outside, the sun barely peaking up and you needed to get the perfect scene as the director really wanted the whole sun rising romantic moment for your and Ben’s characters.

“Ten minutes before we started !” You sighed quietly and quickly finished your coffee, feeling already done with this way too cute scene for you.

Ben waved at you from his chair, Isis not far from him, both of them getting ready too. Yeah, like it wasn’t hard enough for you, Isis managed to get a small part as an extra for few scenes. Easy when you dated the main actor. And even more when you were as gorgeous as she was.

“All done, honey” You thanked Molly and rose on your feet, walking toward the small wardrobe department to get your clothes for the shoot.

A cute little yellow bikini and a pair of sunglasses were all you needed for today. The thought of spending so much time near Ben with so little clothes on was stressful. You nearly fainted when you spotted him walking in his blue swim trunk, a beach towel lazily hanging from his right shoulder.

What a sight.

**

And…action !“

You took a deep sight and blocked every other thoughts than the ones about Ellie, the character you were portraying in this movie.

"I’m glad we decided to come here” Ben or rather Will, murmured in your ear, hands softly resting on your hips as you were perched on his lap.

“Me too” You slightly turned your head just enough to catch his eyes, smiling sweetly.

The scene was indeed very romantic. Kind of cliché but still, it was making your heart beat much faster. Ben was seating on the white sand, his body pressed against you was bringing shivers down your frame.

Your group of friends were seating around a camp fire, giggling and chatting as you and Ben were with them but in your own bubble, looking at each other lovingly.

As the sun slowly rose, you continued to act as you had to, suppressing the love which was wrapping your entire body every time you looked at him. Few kisses were exchanged, few touches as well and other sweet little attentions between the two of you, carefully following the script.

It was even harder because for you everything felt so natural. When you had to play with his hairs at the back of his neck you weren’t acting, not really. It was easy, like you done it your whole life. When Ben rested softly a hand on your knee you didn’t feel awkward or nervous, it felt right. And it had been like that since day one.

“You’re not too cold ? I felt you shiver during our scene” Ben whispered as you had a mini break, waiting for everyone to go back at their assigned spots.

You wanted to laugh at his innocent remark. God bless this sweet, innocent Ben. Yes it wasn’t very warm but the simple feeling of your half naked body against mine was the only main reason of my shivers.

But you simply nodded. “Yeah but it’s alright we’re almost done with this scene anyway” You patted his shoulder nicely and he gently rubbed your forearm, in a nice attempt of keeping your warm.

**

Few hours later and you were still on the beach, few more scenes to film with this time, the sun high in the sky and the heat nicely warming your skin.

You shielded your vision to watch Ben cockily walked toward you, his body dripping wet from the bath he just took in the sea.

“Hey there” He grinned and didn’t lost a minute before laying on top of you, making you squirmed under him at the freshness of the water.

“Get off me idiot !” You giggled and tried to wiggle your way out but his strong body was easily caging you.

“Can’t do that, you’re really comfy” He laid even more on you and you let out a shaky breath as you could feel every muscles of his body against yours. “Everyone is having fun, except you, come on !” You gasped when he ran his wet hand in your hairs, purposely messing them on your face before moving off you.

“I’m reading a very good book” You weakly replied, the lie tasting bitter on your tongue.

You were just avoiding going near his girlfriend. You were on a break for a little hour and most of the crew was in the water and you would love to join them. But Isis was there too, gaining most of the attention as she was always speaking loudly or giggling. And did you mentioned how pretty she was ? Everyone could see that too. So you just felt awkward next to her, stupid really but she was so confident and dating Ben. You were so scared that somehow she noticed how you looked at him and understood what was going on. It would be a total mess if she did. 

“Yeah, whatever” The blond rolled his eyes at you bad excuse before catching your hips and throwing you over his shoulder. You screamed from the top of your lungs as he run toward the water, chuckling louder every time you asked, rather yelled, him to let you go.

He threw you on the water as everyone cheered, apparently really amused by his stupid joke. You felt two hands quickly grabbing you from under the water and you took a big breath, the salty water dripping on your face.

“You’re alright ?” Ben’s giant smile immediately warmed you up. You clenched your hands on his shoulder, wiping the water from your features with your free hand, couching a bit at the salty taste.

“Asshole” You mumbled as you pushed your hairs away from your face. You slapped his chest when he audibly laughed. ”This is so not funny ! I was fine on my towel" You protested but couldn’t suppress the amused smiled from blossoming upon your face.

“Why are you laughing then ?” Ben teased you and you rolled your eyes before swimming away from him, heart fluttering heavily at the simple interaction you just had with him.

Why he had to be so bloody cute with you all the time ? It wasn’t helping your case.

You looked behind your shoulder toward Ben and your smile dropped immediately when you spotted Isis, hanging around his neck as they shared a giggling kiss.

He was just being friendly, get your shit together for god’s sake, (Y/N).

You didn’t miss the suspicious glance that Isis threw you, her brows slightly furrowed like she was in deep reflection. She gave you a little smile when she caught your eyes on her before she focused back on the British man.

You deeply hoped she wasn’t thinking anything about this little friendly moment between you and Ben.

**

“Baby, can you put me some sun-cream on ?” You raised your head toward Ben and stood up, grabbing the protection from his hand.

“You knew you could do it yourself” You commented as you applied a small amount of cream in your hand before rubbing it onto Ben’s large shoulders.

“I can’t reach some part” He grinned, sunglasses hanging low on his nose.

It was like the universe like to torturing you. Every scene you had to do was painfully touchy today and it was putting you under a strong pressure. Isis’ intense gaze on you wasn’t helping either, she watching with attention every of your interactions with her boyfriend.

It wasn’t your fault, you were just acting right now. But you felt incredibly uncomfortable under her eyes. Like you were doing something wrong. Which you weren’t as it was your freaking job.

“You’re just lazy, Will” You rolled your eyes and kept rubbing the sun-cream on his back, breathing quickening as you reached his hips. “Done” You announced before he turned around, welcoming you with his beautiful and chiselled face.

“Why about here, hum ?” He cheekily drummed his digits on his firm pectoral. He cocked his head to the side, wearing your favourite boyish smile. “Don’t wanna burn” He pouted and you bit your lips, finding him unfairly adorable.

You quickly stopped your day dreaming and scoffed as you were supposed to, pretending to be annoyed.

“You’re a pain in the ass, Will” You repeated the same actions, pouring cream in your hands before rubbing it on his warm torso, goosebumps spreading all over your skin,

“But you love me anyway” He replied with a little smile, pushing his sunglasses on the top of his head.

“Yes, I do” You murmured and, not without difficulty, grinned at him. You were supposed to be happy but the painful truth hiding behind your words was hard to get along with.

“Your hands are so much softer than mine” The blond sighed as he closed his eyes, your pads barely touching his abs. You couldn’t go further or you would literally combust.

“That’s because you never want to put night cream on yours, silly” You said and took few steps away as he lowered his head toward you, eyes still closed. You sighed loudly and quickly rubbed the sun cream on his face.

“No, no ! Stop !” The director made you jump as Ben opened his eyes, both of you looking at him. “(Y/N), darling, you were doing perfectly fine but this last scene…you need to be gentle and tender, alright ? It’s supposed to be a romantic scene between Ellie and Will, not looking like you just want to get ride of him” You chuckled weakly and nodded, watching the director going back to his chair.

“Already annoyed with my presence ?” Ben teased as he went back to his previous position.

You simply smiled and waited for the green light of the cameramen before executing the script. You slowly rubbed your fingers against his face, caressing every of his features without looking away from his eyes, giving to the director all the love he wanted. You swallowed thickly at your proximity, his eyes not leaving yours for a second as you kept caressing his strong cheekbones.

“There you go” You rubbed the remaining of cream on his neck and locked your arms behind it, repressing a shiver when his hands found your face.

You absolutely adored how his digits slid softly on your skin, cupping your jaw like if you were the most precious thing in the world. His thumb gently caressing your cheek as he pressed a sickly sweet kiss on your lips. You could feel the warmth coming from his chest and the pleasant sigh which escaped your mouth wasn’t for the act anymore.

There were absolutely not better feeling in the world.

**

You let out a deep breath as you snuggled further into your hoodie, the warmth of the day already fading away as the sun disappeared slowly. You grabbed your phone and answered few texts, exhaustion rolling down your bones.

“Are you texting the guy from yesterday ?” You shook your head lazily, letting a yawn escaping your mouth as Joshua, who was playing your brother, sat next to you. “Why not ?”

“Not really interesting” You didn’t bother explaining further, to tired for that. ”How it’s going with Danny ? When he is coming already ?“

Joshua’s eyes immediately lighted up at the mention of his boyfriend.

"Very well, thanks” He beamed and showed you his new screen lock, an adorable picture of the two of them with their new puppy. You let out a little aww and Joshua smiled wider. “He is coming next week, I can’t wait to see him ! And to introduce him to you !”

You listened to his exciting chatting, a little pinching for your heart at how happy and in love he was.

**

You groaned and get up from your chair as Ben was late for filming. You knew Isis was around so they probably just didn’t see the time, laying in bed. Still, it wasn’t something Ben did often, he was always in time and ready to work.

You swallowed roughly as you walked to his trailer, praying they weren’t shagging because you didn’t know how your heart would take it.

“It’s my freaking job, Isis !” You jumped at Ben’s loud voice followed by few cursing words.

You froze and decided smartly to not knock on the door and instead waited patiently next to the trailer, ear dropping shamelessly. You shouldn’t but you couldn’t help yourself.

“Well, I don’t like it at all, Benjamin !” She yelled back and you heard him sighing, probably knowing he was already late and his girlfriend wasn’t helping. “You didn’t see the way she look at you !”

You felt the same way as the day your best friend from high school threw you a bucket of freezing water on your head. You stopped breathing by fear they would hear you and tried your best to not panic.

Was she talking about you ?

Of course she was ! Who else could be the She ? You were done, done, done. The rest of the filming would be just awkward because of you and your stupid feelings.

"Oh my god, Isis ! We already had this conversation, (Y/N) is simply doing her job, alright ? You need to stop being so paranoiac for Christ’ sake !”

You felt yourself sweating uncomfortably as you listened to them, heart beating like crazy. This was a nightmare.

“She is not acting anymore Ben ! Open your damn eyes for once !” Isis groaned as she slammed a cup loudly on the table, making you jumped again. “She is not acting at all ! It’s fucking obvious !”

“What are you saying Isis ?” Ben muttered, clearly done with this argument. “Come on, enlighten me as apparently you know better than everyone !”

There a beat of complete silence, your muslces completely tetanised as you waited for her answer.

Isis let out a sarcastic, cold laugh. It worried you a lot. And then she pronounced these six little words which would make your heart stop. 

“She is fucking in love with you, Ben”

**

Tag list :  @jennyggggrrr @queenlover05 @cubedtriangle​

Message me if u want to be add in the tag list !

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: Arranged {1}

Yahya Abdul Mateen II x OFC Nyorie Kane

Warning: Plot

Words: 1.4k

Summary: Yahya is thirty-three, and his friends and family all seem to believe that it is long overdue for him to have a wife. He’s been set up more times than he can count and with his busy schedule and rising Hollywood star, it is becoming even more difficult to meet people, well people who aren’t looking for a come up. In the beginning, he said he didn’t want anything serious; his motto was “I’m was here for a good time not a long time.” Then it became he didn’t want anything that would distract him from where he wanted to go and what he wanted to accomplish. Now that his fame is rising and he’s approaching a sweet spot in his career he decides what the hell the time might be right.

In comes “A Match”, an exclusive matchmaking company run by his best friend Ramel’s wife Tamika. He gives Tamika and Ramel free rein and all his trust to find him, someone, he’d mesh well with. Instead of going through her clientele Tamika has just the right woman in mind, her best friend, Nyorie. Things are done a little unorthodox at “A Match” though. This unconventional route is credited for a near-perfect success rate.

Note: I’ve only tagged those who have expressed to be on a forever tag list. 

****Also, please keep an open mind.

**Loosely Proofread/Edited**

✧*.。:。✧*.:。✧*✧*.。:。✧*.:。✧*✧*.。:。✧*.:。✧*

 Chapter One

  “Man, you not getting any younger. Plus we all know how important family is to you the rate you’re going you not even gonna have one till you fifty,” Ramel said as he came back into the living room with his hands full of food. Ramel stopped in front of the U-shaped sectional and handed out bags to their owners. He stood up and took the cream-colored plastic bag Ramel held out for him.

 “I don’t know how many times you’re going to keep saying this.”

 “As many times as need be. I mean really, is uncle Ya good enough bruh?”

 He pulled out the containers of food and thought about Ramel’s words for a few moments. He loved being uncle Ya, loved picking his niece Havea and nephew Rami up for their biweekly ice-cream and bowling night. He loved showing up to their school functions and trips to Disney and tagging along to kid movie premiers. He wouldn’t change anything about it.

“Look man, I know you love my kids. What’s not to love? I also know you want kids of your own. You can’t have that continuing on the way you are,” Ramel drilled home.

 He knew it. Truthfully, he’d been mulling the pros and cons over for months. Ramel wasn’t the only one in his life badgering him like this. His mother, sisters, and brother were all on his case too. His mother liked to pile on the guilt asking him when she’d get a grandchild and when she’d get to see him walk down the aisle and made it no secret she was praying for it before she died. What the hell was he to say to that?

 “Not everybody wanna be married Mel, you got half the squad on that ball and chain shit leave him alone,” Rashawn blurted out. The four of them laughed loudly. Normally they’d be keeping it down because of the kids but they were at a sleepover, so they were free to be as loud as they wanted.

 “Man, shut up. He the last one. Your ass bout to be on that ball and chain shit too. One-week fool,” Ramel added.

 “You don’t have to remind me. Torri has the house filled with everything wedding related. Man, this week needs to hurry up so we can get back to real life.”

 He leaned back and focused on his food. He was the last one in the group still single. The last one of the four musketeers, the lone wolf. It didn’t bother him before; it was just the way it was. Now—he wouldn’t focus on it, not now.

 They continued to watch the basketball game and talk like they always did when they got together. They’d been friends for a long time, and he valued their friendship and advice. He trusted them with everything and would always have their backs as he knew the same was true for them.

 Rashawn desperately stayed away from all and any talk about his wedding to Torri. He acted like he’d been caroused into the wedding when everyone knew damn well he was stupid in love and cried through the proposal. Ramel assumed the role of loudmouth big brother pretending like he knew everything; it was a role he’d played for most of their friendship. Tyrell didn’t pretend to not be the hopelessly devoted husband he was to Dacia; he was the one who was always caught texting her and secretly face-timing her during guys night out. When they got together, a lot of fun and a lot of shit-talking always happened and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

 By the time the game ended, the food finished, and Tamika came home it was close to two in the morning. Ramel wasted no time kicking everyone out when he saw how inebriated Tamika was.

 “Y’all don’t have to go home, but you got to get the hell up outta here. My woman is drunk, we got no kids for the night, some freaky shit bout to go down!”

 They all rolled their eyes and quickly began gathering their things.

 “How freaky?” He looked back to see Tamika crook her pointer and wiggle it to Ramel who smiled but pushed her hand down trying to hide her finger. He knew they were into some freaky shit and he did not need the details or the visuals.

 “Imma head out. I have an early day later anyway. Stay up man,” he said and went around the group giving each of them their handshake.

 “Think about what I said burh. We here for you,” Ramel finished. He nodded and walked over to Tamika and gave her a kiss on the cheek before he walked out the door to his car in the rounded driveway.

 The drive back to his house was a quick and quiet one. When he got home he showered and used the rest of his awake time to prep for the coming day. He knew it would be a long one.

  -The Next Day-

 Just as expected the day stretched on and on. He got maybe two hours of sleep before he was out of the house and on a set for a photoshoot. That shoot went on for eight hours, then he was off to a string of interviews then two meetings and yet another photoshoot.

 It was now close to one in the morning and they were just getting their last shots. He was exhausted. he knew this came with the territory. If he wanted to act he had to be okay with photoshoots, interviews, paparazzi, and everything else that came with fame. Some days it was a tough pill to swallow and he wondered what it would have been to continue on in architecture, and others he took it in stride and piled more onto his plate. Today was a mix of both.

 “All right Yahya, thank you that’s a wrap,” the photographer called out. He nodded and went around shaking hands with everyone who worked the shoot. A woman with dirty blond hair approached him with a wide smile.

 “I am such a fan, Yahya. I loved you in Aquaman.” He graciously smiled and thanked her. She bit her bottom lip and gave him a look he knew wasn’t strictly friendly. “Can I have a picture?”

 “Sure. No problem,” he cautiously responded as he stepped beside her and waited for her to angle her phone just right.

 “Say Black Manta.” He smiled at her request and held up his peace fingers. Once the photo was taken she turned to him again and thanked him.

 “Look, I know this is forward and normally I wouldn’t do this but it’s 2020, I’m gonna shoot my shot.” She held out a piece of paper to him and he could see a phone number scribbled across it.

 “This is my number. No pressure to use it, just—if you want to use it, I’d answer, and we could hang out.”

 She was attractive, he wasn’t going to deny that. Her skin reminded him of smooth chestnut. Coupled with the color of her hair she was a beautiful woman. He was just leery of her motives. Ninety percent of the women he’d met since his breakout roles all had ulterior motives.  Most just wanted to be seen out with him so the rumor mill could start circulating and give them their fifteen minutes. He wasn’t with that. That was the one thing about his newfound fame. He never knew what anyone wanted from him anymore.

 “Uh--.” He was speechless. He didn’t want to embarrass her by rejecting her, so he took the paper and nodded. “Thank—you.”

 She smiled and again bite her bottom lip. “Okay, great. See you around.” She walked off leaving him to look down at the paper with her name and number. “Thalia-954-389-3048.” She’d dotted her I with a star. It bothered him and he didn’t know why. He stuffed the paper in his pocket resolved in his decision not to take it there.  He didn’t have the time or energy to sift through the sea of clout chasers.

 He quickly finished up, got his things and left. He’d missed his workout for the day and needed to get one in. every little bit helped especially with him trying to get into Matrix shape.

 Luckily his trainer was up and was able to meet him at the gym to train. A few reps on the treadmill, another couple sets of weights, then some time on the bar and finally a brutal boxing session rounded out the hour and fifteen-minute rotation. By the end of it, he was dripping sweat and ready to just drop in bed which is just what he did. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

***If you want to be tagged please SEND AN ASK SO IT WILL BE EASIER FOR ME TO KEEP TRACK OF. Thank you for reading!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TagList:

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[the-drunken-fist]

October 19th.

Yeah, it’s here.

I was thinking a lot what I could do for my lovely boy’s bday (and I am not talking about Jon Favreau, u sinners) bc actually I can’t do anything but silly notes about manga. However, one night a great idea came to my mind and said:

“What about Shisui’s appearance?”

“Appearance?”

“Appearance.”

“Shisui’s appearance?”

“Yes, Shisui’s appearance. You know, curly hair, body flicker, non-stop sharingan using, mad oldsters, coups, Uchiha fucking guys… Shisui!”

“Has it been a parody to Snatch?”

And so, I thought it would be pretty… interesting (?) try to realize some Modern AU headcanons about Shisui and his appearance. Let’s do it:

Shisui had some problems with his appearance in the childhood. When he went to the 1 grade, children immediately gave him a name “Potato-Shisui”. And do u know why??? Because of his nose. Shisui had never paid attention to such a feature of him and didn’t even think that his classmates’ name-calling was bad. But soon our boy understood that children went far and everything was changing into bullying. Shisui decided to turn the situation the other way. He was the highest child in the group, so during one of those unpleasent moments it was enough for him just to stand up silently, showing who was the boss in the area.

Yes, Shisui was tall. And slender. Very slender. He was a small copy of Thomas Sangster. But! This body that seemed extremely weak for… life… was actually strong and full of energy. Uchiha had always been the winner in all sport competitions at school. Especially in running ones. And it wasn’t just one-minute activity. It was his life. He run every day, in different weather because it gave him the feeling of freedom, fly, wind. It gave feelings. Great, but Shisui got another name-calling… “Russian wolfhound”.

Hair. Lovely curls that would make girls moan in the attack of cuteness in the future. But at that time he couldn’t find any advantages in them. Only big problems in hair care. Once a boy from his group even asked him if he was a Jewish. Shisui was surprised and seriously started to think about it. He knew much about his ancestors but that idea had never been in any of his family’s books and documents. But for him it sounded cool. And interesting.

Shisui didn’t consider himself handsome at all. And, yeah, such questions were opened when the period of his adolescence became. It wasn’t an idea-fix, u know, it was automatically because there were a lot of talks about it, hormones and all such unexpected things. But our 13-year-old baby didn’t even realize that he expressed such charismatic, self-confident, strong aura that made him much more incredible than even the prettiest face could make.

With time the body of our Shisui started to fill itself with visible physical strength. The shoulders became wider and more massive, the muscles like layers were growing on arms, legs, torso aki on titan in Shingeki. After the vacation like a new person came back to the classes. He looked much older than all his coevals. And his voice… when a teacher first time called him to answer the homework after such metamorphosis and the boy opened his mouth, all pupils in the classroom twitched. Gentle, light voice had changed into deep, strong, with features of whiskey and honey.

Continue the previous paragraph. It’s extremely necessary to mention the type of his speech. Oh, boys and girls… he was a talented orator. Shisui spoke absolutely clearly, accurately, confidently. But this talent became the reason why teachers always asked the boy to participate in something like “Competition of readers”. Shisui was a polite boy, so his answer was always “Ok, with pleasure”. Despite the fact of his incredible skills in a such activity Uchiha didn’t pretty like it. To stand in the center of people’s attention was a nightmare.  

Later the traits of his beauty transformed into more masculine. All the parts of his face, that had always seemed too big for it, started to add very strong and self-willed features to boy’s appearance. He wasn’t a kind of guys with “traditional beauty” like Sasuke. He had something strange in his look (in a good way), contradictory. Big soft eyes with long eyelashes went with a strong jaw and high cheekbones in an extremely fantastic manner.

Clothes style. I say only two words – dark/casual. Boy, I can understand u absolutely. And Itachi inherited this style from his friend. Sometimes, when people see Itachi and Shisui together, they think that the boys wear the same clothes. Honestly, it has sense bc Itachi got some Shisui’s hand-me-downs. And the reason isn’t in difficult financial situation. Itachi doesn’t follow fashion but near there is always Shisui who can say “U have always liked this hoodie. Take it, i’ve become too big for it”. Would you refuse?

At 17 Shisui understood that it was time to stop pretending. He had terribly bad eyesight and it was becoming worse and worse. The problems continued from the time when he was 7, but our boy tried not to pay attention to it (oh, yes, lovely, I know…). He spent 2 hours in the optical store surrounded by long shelves with enormous amount of glasses of different styles, forms, colors. He was confused. Highly confused. Thanks to a nice woman there who helped him recommending many pairs which should suit him.

 Accessories. Shisui has always been a big fun of little details in the look (and he wasn't even supposed). Bandanas, caps, wrist braces, belts – are his favourities. He even presented а nice necklace to Itachi for his birthday. And after “the-optical-store-incident” he found out that glasses would become honorary members of his small collection.

 Bonus! Some songs from Shisui’s playlist. Naruto calls it “Grandfather’s album”:

Gone With The Sin – HIM (!!!!!!!!!! – forever love 1);

July - Noah Cyrus;

Thoughts & prayers – Grandson;

Six Billion - Nothing But Thieves;

Lonely - Palaye Royale;

O'clock - Emilie Zoé;

We Are Young feat. Janelle Monae - Fun. feat. Janelle Monáe;

About Her - Malcolm McLaren;

How We Roll - Hollywood Undead (at all HU was Shisui’s adolescent love);

Enough's Enough - Paris Shadows (Sasuke’s recommendation);

Where Did You Sleep Last Night – Nirvana;

Let It Go - Def Leppard;

When the Smoke Is Going Down – Scorpions (!!!!!!! – forever love 2);

Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High? - Arctic Monkeys;

Girl, You'll Be a Woman Soon - Urge Overkill;

Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood - Soundtrack Wonder Band (Itachi always prays to all possible Gods to stop Shisui rampaging (dancing) during this song);

Otherside - Red Hot Chili Peppers;

Satisfaction - The Rolling Stones (rampaging song №2);

Chinese Democracy - Guns N' Roses (“No, Shisui,” Itachi said wearily. “Yes, Shisui. My car, my rules.”);

HUMBLE - Kendrick Lamar (unexpected but Naruto insisted. His “cool track” should “colorize” grandad’s list);

Lounge Act – Nirvana;

That's all for today. Thank u for your attention. And now go drink to the health of such a perfect man 🎁🎈🎂🌸💫

[toorusquill]

hello may i have a hq matchup? i’m like 4’11, i have dark hair (short) and brown eyes! my style is 90s grunge! im bisexual n i’m a leo, im a isfj person. if i was in a relationship i would b really clingy but ofc only if the person im w likes that! im really good at listening at others, also im very mentally unstable so my humor is ab su1cdal jokeslol, i curse a lot n listen to indie music. im more a night person so i would j escape n run in the rain at 4am. 🛹

also i dont know if you know mystic messenger but i would like a matchup too! 🛹 have a great day^^

hello! unfortunately, i don’t play mystic messenger !! yet

and all jokes aside, i truly hope you’re doing okay! you can always talk to me :(

i match you up with sugawara koushi.

-sugawara doesn’t mind that you’re clingy at all!! in fact, you’re also likely to get swamped by his affection if you are okay with it!! he craves for your touch, and seeks it from you. it’s not uncommon for him to give you back hugs, cheek kisses, and the like when you guys are in public!!

-he likes your presence too, so if you’re clingy in the aspect that means you want to be around him as much as possible, he doesn’t mind!

-is really happy that you don’t mind listening to him rambling about numerous things. whether it was about how his day went, or how kageyama and hinata started bickering over a volleyball yesterday, he’s lucky to be able to find solace in you.

-on days where he’s a little down, he doesn’t say much though. he talks a bit about it, but he just wants to be around you.

-on the flipside, he’s also very compassionate and patient! he understands that you’re sometimes prone to joking about things that other people aren’t used to, and while he mostly just gives your hand a reassuring squeeze when you say these things in public, he urges you to tell him anything that may help you :(

-he cares a lot about you, don’t blame him for being too worried.

-enjoys your music! will ask you for recommendations from time to time, and if you have any playlists, he asks you for them! it feels like he has part of you close to him at all times when he listens to the songs that you like.

-is up for spontaneous night runs! he acts all cute too; pretending you guys are in a hollywood coming of age teen movie, and he tries to be as romantic as possible! kissing in the rain is def something you’ve done already.

*GIF not mine

i hope u liked this!

- vera 🌸.

[storyofmychoices]

One Day at a Time

[Ethan Ramsey x Ellie Shepherd Masterlist]

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x Ellie Shepherd (MC) Book: Open Heart (Book Two)

Word Count: <1,750​ Rating/Warnings: Teen; character with ptsd/survivor’s guilt *angst, hurt/comfort*

Summary: After learning about the depth to which Ellie is struggling with survivor’s guilt, Ethan tries to find small ways to help Ellie begin to readjust to life following her near death experience.

This takes place the morning after the events of “In Between”.

This is a companion piece to my series Love & Scotch (an Open Heart/Hollywood U crossover).

Her metal fork scraped against the ceramic plate, creating a dissonance that would typically cause her to cringe. She continued shifting her barely-touched omelette side to side, the harsh sound hardly registering. She signed softly, her glassy gaze distant.

Ethan watched her intently. His brows knitted together, concern etched across his countenance. "Ellie."

Her name called her warmly. "Mhmm?" she hummed half-heartedly without glancing up.

His fingers drifted across the kitchen island, brushing over hers, pausing her movements. "Look at me."

She wanted to pull away. It would be easier, but she knew he'd never leave her alone if she did, not after last night.

"I'm worried about you." His eyes searched hers for signs that she was still there, but her gaze was dull. "I'm right here. You're not alone."

Ellie nodded once. It wasn't that she necessarily felt alone. She felt empty, lost, drifting—like nothing mattered and nothing ever could. She had appreciated that he wanted to help, but the thought of spending the whole day with him and that look of pity on his face was the last thing she wanted. The solitude of curling up in bed seemed much preferable than this. She wished he hadn't called them out of work. At least at the hospital, she could blend in, go through the motions, and hide from herself. 

"Let's go." He took one last sip of his coffee and circled around to guide her out of her chair. 

The sudden change pulled her temporarily from her melancholy. "Wait. What?" 

She hadn't heard him mention anything about leaving, but she realized even if he had, her mind had drifted, and she hadn't been listening anyway. "Where?" 

He took her hand, guiding her forward. "We're going for a walk."

"Why?"

"You need it." His tone left little room to argue. "Would you like to change first?"

Ellie shrugged, looking down at her worn pajama bottoms and slippers. "Does it matter?"

He didn't want to pressure her unduly; although, he knew getting dressed was a small step in the right direction. "I think it would help," he replied gently. "However, if you're not up to it—"

She shook her head to the side, cutting him off. She knew he was only trying to be supportive. "Give me ten minutes."

"Ten minutes," he repeated, watching her retreat, wondering if she'd return on her own accord. 

To his surprise, she did. 

It had been a little over twenty minutes. He had planned on giving her another five before checking in. 

"You're beautiful," he offered, a smile alighting his face upon seeing her look more herself. 

She had gotten dressed to go to work daily, but that had been it for weeks, and even then, it was only ever scrubs.

"Thank you." A faint light flickered momentarily in the despair, clinging to her features, before fading away. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. 

"Shall we?" He held his hand in front of her, guiding her toward the door. Reluctantly, she dragged herself forward, hoping the outing would earn her some reprieve upon their return. 

They walked wordlessly down the road and across town toward the park. 

Ellie hugged her arms to her chest, pulling her sweater closer to her despite the warm weather. 

His gaze lingered on her every few minutes, giving her space but also looking for a way in. He had appreciated her opening up to him the previous night, but he knew the depth of her pain. Healing would take time—progress would only be accomplished through a series of small steps.

As they turned onto the picturesque path of the local park, he took advantage of her arm dropping to her side. His fingers brushed up against hers. 

His touch sent a flurry of warmth through her. Her eyes brightened as her fingers connected with his. She drew in a deep breath, letting his touch strengthen her before letting go. 

"Ellie?" His shining blue eyes rivaled the sky above them, drawing her in. He slipped his hand into hers as she turned her attention toward him. 

Her face flushed at the unexpected affection. She looked around cautiously, "Someone might see."

"Let them," he stated firmly, refusing to let go. 

"Really?" She sucked her lower lip. "Are you sure? We don't have to—"

He quieted her concern with a feathery kiss on her temple. "I told you, I'm right here." He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "I meant it."

She looked down, kicking a small stone she noticed in her path, trying desperately to push back the memories. 

The last time he had held her hand this openly was that day when they both thought she was dying. He had been there, he had refused to leave, he had held her, and then, he left. After they developed the cure and she was on the mend, he kept her at arm's length at work, insisting they must keep up appearances once more. 

She drew in a deep breath, turning away. Her eyes pooled with unshed tears that she hopelessly attempted to hold back.

"Ellie." He squeezed her hand again, his thumb brushing softly over her knuckles. "It's okay."

Her lips pressed tightly together; she was afraid if she opened them, the tears would fall, and it would be over.

"Not here," he wrapped his arm around her. "Come with me." 

He led her off the path and through a small set of trees until they spotted a bench off to the side. It was more secluded than most of the areas in the park. She wondered how he knew about it. She didn't really think of him as someone who had spent much time here before. 

He guided her down and settled in beside her. He held her hand gently again, waiting on her.

"We don't need to talk if you're not ready," he reassured her. "That's not what this is about." Ellie nodded weakly. "Try to ground yourself in the present; choose one thing to hold on to, like letting yourself feel the sun." 

For a while, they sat quietly. Her misty gaze focused on something in the distance as he kept watch. She had tried to remember the comforting sensation the golden rays of light dancing on her skin used to bring. It certainly seemed there were others around her finding pleasure in the beauty of the day. Still, she felt nothing. She played with the sleeves of her sweater, trying to quell the nerves growing at the realization. 

"I'm right here," he reminded her softly as more time passed. 

"Are you, though?" Her tone was harsher than she intended.

"You know that I am."

"Do I?" Ellie pulled her hand away, crossing her arms across her chest again. "I needed you, and you pulled away!"

His brows raised questioningly.

 "When this—us— first started, we agreed to keep it quiet at work until we were ready. That day—" She focused her breathing, trying to slow the tears that were now spilling freely. "That day, you didn't leave my side. You slept in my room in front of everyone. I thought maybe things had changed. When I came back to work, I needed you, and you weren't there." Ethan started to protest. "I know you were there at the end of the day in private, but I needed you more. I know that's unfair to put on you. I know we had an agreement. I know I didn't say anything. I know this is my fault, like everything else. I just—"

He rested his head against hers. His hands rubbed her back gently as her sobs took over. 

"I'm sorry. Nothing about this is your fault. Not what happened that day, not how anyone else reacted to it or you. I should have seen the signs before I did. I can't change the past, but whatever you need, I'm here now. Nothing is your fault," he repeated, fighting back his own frustrations on having failed her. "I'm sorry, Ellie."

She buried her head in his shoulder as he offered her himself. Her words muffled against him. "I can't even feel the sun. I'm hopeless."

"You're not hopeless." His face fell, and his brows pulled together at her words. He couldn't imagine how hard this was for her, but at the moment, he was feeling helpless. She needed more than he was. Not knowing what else to do, he simply held her in his arms. He may not have been there earlier, but he wasn't about to let go now. His fingers cascaded tenderly over her back, soothing her cries. "I've got you."

As her tears began to subside, Ethan took her hand and placed it on his chest over his heart. He rested his other hand above hers. "Ellie, you're the strongest person I know. You challenge me, inspire me, and remind me I'm not as clever as I think I am." 

A quiet chuckle slipped from her lips, and a fragment of light fractured in her darkness. 

"I feel you. I feel your heart. I don't pretend to know your pain, but I know how much stronger than it you are." Ethan's lips curled up in admiration. "But if you can't feel that, then focus on this." He tapped the top of her hand over his chest. "I love you, Ellie. Whenever you feel like nothing matters, know my heart beats for you."

Silent tears slid across her cheeks at his words. "Really?"

"Of course."

She bit the corner of her lip, trying to muster the strength. "No. Did Mr. grumpy-I-don't-believe-in-love Ethan Ramsey really use such a cheesy line?"

His eyes shut as his smile stretched across his face. His own tears fell as he laughed at the slight change in her demeanor. "I believe in you." 

Ellie wished she believed in herself, but right now, she was too far gone from who she was for that. But, she did believe in him, even now. Her eyes closed as she let the steady rhythm of his heart beneath her fingertips ground her in the moment, drowning out the memories fighting for her focus.

"One day at a time," he whispered. Ethan knew the road ahead would be long and full of unforeseen challenges. "Whatever challenges we face, we'll do it together."

"Together. One day at a time," she breathed, letting the promise those words held, bring her some peace. 

A/N: Thank you for being patient with me while I step back from the fandom. Not everyone has been supportive, but for those of you that have, I truly appreciate it. The two weeks I’ve been “off” have been really great. While I”m not 100% confident with this, I did want to write it and want to share it which is a step in the right direction. Angst and hurt/comfort are not my areas so if you made it this far, THANK YOU for reading and I hope it’s not awful. I truly don’t understand how PB didn’t give MC more time to get over their life/death experience. Or challenge how the LI were 100% available and then kinda just pretended it didn’t happen. 

These tag lists are a combination of my updated one along with people who didn’t reply but have interacted this year. If you want to stay or leave my tag list, please let me know if you haven’t already

Choices Perma: @the-soot-sprite ; @princess-geek​ ; @gardeningourmet ; @katrinegrey ; @trappedinfanfiction ; @aleynareads ; @lucy-268 ; @xjustin-ethansgirliex​ ; @maurine07 ;

Not confirmed: @lilyoffandoms ; @zeniamiii ; @whimsicallywayward15;  @tyrils-star ; @arnikki-2406 ; @schnitzelbutterfingers 

OH // Ethan Tags : @burnsoslow ; @curiouslittlefreak; @callmeellabella ; @jamespotterthefirst ; @thearianam 

Not confirmed:  @mvalentine @rookie-ramsey ; @missmiimiie  ; 

[katlyn1948]

I wrote something...its an original and I wrote it because I was feeling something. It’s sort of a personal experience, except really dramatized. I hope you like it, considering its an oringal...

“Rejection tends to leave one with a bitter taste in the mouth. The feeling that can cascade down to one’s soul that rejection leaves is almost depth defying. One’s worthiness comes to play; is it because you aren’t good enough, or simply passed for something better? It’s a heart wrenching feeling, especially when one already feels a bit empty inside. And the courage it takes, knowing that rejection is on the other side, takes days, months, maybe even years to gain.

Then when faced with the inevitable, one tends to chalk up their feelings and pretend that all is right in the world, when really they want to scream to the heavens above demanding a decent answer as to why they weren’t enough.

It’s a scenario that’s been played millions of times, across decades or centuries, even across countries and worlds. The same scenario that Anya found herself in right now.

It was a deafening blow to her already fragile confidence as she struggled to maintain the plastered smile on her crumbling face. The years it took for her to finally admit to the one person who she trusted most in this world, the one person she could tell anything to that she was irrevocably in love with them, only to have them not return the sentiments felt like a shockwave to the system.

The effort she put to set up the perfect environment, with them secluded on her New York roof top gazing upon the stars above as the soft illumination of twinkling lights danced upon his rugged features. An old time projection wheel she had borrowed from her drama teacher clicked behind them as they watched Hollywood movies of the forties and fifties, with a trail mix of popcorn, M&M’s, and salted pretzels situated between their bodies. One could call it a perfect date; just the two of them enjoying the things they loved together, but for Anya, it ended up in heartbreak and tears.

“I love you.” She blurted out after the projection wheel had finally run out of film.

“I love you, too.” Mikel chuckled, placing the bowl of mix on a near by end table she had brought up from her tiny apartment.

Anya could feel her pounding heart within in her chest, fearing that it would bound right though her rib cage and into his lap. She knew she would have to elaborate her meaning, for Mikel thought it was just a term of endearment; what any pair of best friends would say to each other. She hesitated before quickly placing her soft hands upon his rugged ones. It was a gesture they had done hundreds of times, as a way of comfort. But Anya wanted this time to feel like longing. She wanted him to understand her feelings for him. Taking a deep breath, she grasped his hands a little tighter and brought them to her lips, “No, Mikel. I love you.”

Sudden realization crossed Mikel’s face and Anya was unsure of what he was thinking. She knew that it could be a surprise, but she was sure of his feelings for her, and that’s what lead her to confess her love for him.

“Oh, Anya...I...” His sentence faded off his lips, not having the courage to continue.

Anya felt a sudden surge of fear as the silence between them lingered. She tired to open her mouth to speak, but she was unsure of what to say. Hundreds of thoughts swam through her head and slowly, the realization began to make way.

“You...you don’t feel the same way.” It wasn’t a question, but rather a revelation.

“Anya, you’re my best friend and I do love you...just not in the way I think you love me.” Several minutes has passed and Anya had yet to speak. She had released Mikel’s hands and scooted to the far end of their makeshift fort, trying to gain as much distance as she could from him.

“Anya, please say something.” He whispered softly. She could see him move closer to her and her head snapped to his eyes, a fake smile plastered on her face.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking. I think...I think I just got caught up in the moment, that’s all.” As the words escaped her lips, she could feel the twisting pang in her heart. It physically hurt her to say the things she was saying. None of it was true, for she was completely in love with the man before her, but she couldn’t lose him, not over a confession she could have kept to herself.

A nervous chuckle passed through his lips, “Right...for a second there, I thought you were serious.”

Anya let out a forced laugh, “No! Obviously not...I mean, I don’t want to do anything to jeopardize our friendship.”

“Exactly!” Mikel agreed, only breaking Anya’s heart into a million more pieces. “So...I guess I should be going. Gotta early morning.”

“That’s right! The interview is tomorrow.” Anya pulled herself up from the scattered pillows and began to walk Mikel to the roof’s entrance. “Tell me now it goes, yeah?

“You’ll be the first to know.” He smiled and quickly placed a soft kiss on her cheek. Anya’s body stiffened and it took everything in her not to break before he had a chance to click the door behind him.

“Good luck.” She said through a shaky breath.

“Thanks, I’ll need it.” And with that he was out the door and down the steps.

Anya locked the door behind him. She didn’t want to run the risk of him coming back and seeing her in a crying mess, because that’s what she was. She could no longer hold the tears from her eyes as they fell like waterfalls down her cheeks. A sob pushed it’s way through her throat as she fell to the floor, clutching her legs close to her. She hadn’t expected to feel this way. Her thoughts had lead her to believe that Mikel felt the same way.

The hints and clues he seemed to drop just for her felt like a dead giveaway.

He would take the time to learn subtle things about her that she hadn’t disclosed to him before. And even though they had known each other since they were elven, she was too reserved to let him in completely. It was a complete shock to her when he learned that her favorite artist was Monet, or that she was allergic to artichokes. Or even the way she liked to drink her tea during a snowy afternoon. These were things she had kept to herself that he had willing observed to find out.

The niceties of it all were too much to not be an indication of his feelings, but she was wrong.

Her tears had ceased, leaving nothing but drying streaks from where they had slipped down her face, when a buzz vibrated from her back pocket. It was Lyra, her sister, who was calling. No doubt to see how the events of the night had unfolded.

“Hello?” She answered.

“So...how did it go? Did he sweep you off your feet and kiss you until your lips became purple.”

Anya sighed, “Not exactly...he doesn’t feel the same way.”

“Oh, Anya...I’m so sorry.” She could hear the sincerity in her sister’s voice and it nearly broke her all over again. “Are you okay?”

Anya nodded into the phone, “Yeah, of course.” No, you’re not.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m fine.” Stop lying, your heart is broken

“Well, at least you and Mikel can still be friends. That hasn’t changed.”

“Yeah, of course! Nothing’s changed between us.” Everything has changed between us.

“I am glad you’re taking this with stride.”

“Me, too.” I’m a mess.

“Well, I just want to check up on you, and I’m proud of you for doing it, even if it didn’t go as planned. I’ll talk to you soon, okay.”

“Yeah, thanks for calling Lyra, I appreciate it.”

“Any time, sis. I love ya!”

Anya softly smiled, “I love you, too.”

She clicked her phone off and shoved it into her back pocket before striding to where the thrown pillows laid askew. She slumped down onto the them and laid back to stare up at the stars above, her mind slowly drifted into a dreamless slumber.

————

Mikel got the job, and as promised she was the first to know. She was truly happy for him and offered to by a round at their favorite bar in celebration.

Seven was their meet time and as usual, Anya arrived twenty minutes early to grab a pair of seats at the bar before anyone else had time to claim them. She ordered a water, not wanting to start the celebrations without him. Seven had rolled around, as per usual, Mikel was running late, never truly arriving until a solid ten minutes after their agreed time. But then seven thirty came and went and then eight and eight thirty.

Anya began to get nervous as she tapped her fingers upon the mahogany bar. She pulled her phone from her clutch and check if there were any missed calls or messages, but nothing of the sorts popped up. She quickly ran her fingers over the keyboard of her phone, typing out a message of ‘Where are u?” Before clicking if off.

“Sweetheart? Are you going to order anything beside water? If not, then I need you to leave, I have customers to attend.” The bartender asked her.

Anya sighed, “Can I get a Cosmo?”

“Coming right up.”

Anya check her phone again and there was still no response. She downed the cosmo the bartender left for her and paid the bill, slapping the cash on the bar in frustration. She gathered her things, and hurried out the bar, walking the three city blocks it took to get to her apartment. By the time she opened her front door and threw off her heels, the time of her phone read ‘9:17.’

Mikel had stood her up without so much as an explanation.

Anya nearly burst into tears from the frustration she was feeling, but the dinging from her phone pulled her mind elsewhere.

‘Sorry,’ it read. ‘Miller and the boys took me out. Rain check?’

‘Yeah, rain check.’ She quickly replied.

Anya groaned and threw her phone on her bedside table, wanting to take back everything.

——————

There wouldn’t be a rain check. Not really.

Mikel had all but excluded her from his life. They would make plans and then a few hours before they were to meet, he would cancel them.

She was sure he would make it to her exhibition, with her film project being front a center. He had know it was an important day, for hundreds of people would come and see her talent as a cinematographer. It was a project she had been working on for nearly two years, putting in a lot of time and effort to make it was it was. She’d given him the ticket three weeks before the events on the roof top and he said that he wouldn’t miss it for the world.

But as she searched through the crowd, she couldn’t spot his face.

That broke her heart more than his rejection, because he let her down. As her best friend, he let her down.

Anya called her sister that night, crying to her over the phone as she recounted the roof top night. She couldn’t lie to her sister, not anymore, and the blow of Mikel missing one of the biggest days in her life broke her.

——————

A month had passed since her exhibition and Mikel had yet to reach out to her. Anya was beginning to think the Mikel was just some figment of her imagination and never really existed, that is until a knock came from her apartment door.

She unlatched the lock before thinking and swung the door open, not expecting Mikel to be standing in front of her.

“Mikel, what are you doing here?” She asked a little surprised.

“I wanted to stop by. I feel like we haven’t seen each other.”

“Well, we haven’t.” She swung her door open a little further to allow him to enter.

“Yeah...I guess that’s my fault.” Anya clicked the door shut and followed him to the tiny kitchen table that was big enough just for the two of them.

“Why are you here, Mikel?” Anya asked, a little frustrated.

Mikel shrugged and then pulled a post card from his pocket. Anya picked up the crumbled paper and saw the familiar Golden Gate Bridge across the picture. “What’s this?”

“I’m moving...to San Francisco. My job relocated.”

“Oh...congrats.”

“Thanks...I wanted to tell you in person. Actually, you’re the first person I’ve told.” He said shyly.

“Wow...didn’t know that was still allowed that honor.” She scoffed.

Mikel crinkled his eyes in confusion, “What? Of course, you’re my best friend.”

“Really? Because a best friend wouldn’t forget the biggest opportunity I could have ever had. Or did you just not care?”

“Anya...what are you talking abou- oh, the exhibition! I completely forgot! I’ve been so busy with work that I spaced out.” He said truthfully.

Anya scoffed, “I called you ten times, Mikel! And each time it was sent to voicemail. I looked for you! And you weren’t there.”

“I’m not lying, Anya. I’ve been really busy-”

“And what about drinks after you got the job? We agreed to celebrate and then you flaked for ‘Miller and the boys’ while I sat at the bar like some idiot! Were you too buys then?”

“I...no. I avoided you. Look, I know you meant what you said on the rooftop. I know you like me, but I just don’t feel the same way, Anya. I didn’t want it to be awkward between us, so I flaked and I’m sorry. I thought that if I avoided you long enough, that you’d get over this silly crush and everything could go back to normal. I didn’t realize I was the one jeopardizing our friendship.” Mikel confessed, but the frustration in Anya only turned to anger and disappointment as he revealed his true feelings.

“Silly crush? You think that I’ve had a silly crush this whole time? Jesus, Mikel...I love you! I fucking love you with every bit of my being. You know how much courage it took me to tell you and then you rejected me! I mean...how could I not fall in love with you? You know everything about me, even things that I didn’t know myself. I thought you paying attention to those details meant that you felt the same way. We’ve been best friends for thirteen years, Mikel. You’re the person I want to be with.” She couldn’t help the tears fall from her eyes as she shed her armor to be completely vulnerable.

Mikel let out a long sigh, “Anya, I picked up on those things because you’re my best friend. You think it was impossible for me not to notice how you twisted your face every time you were in deep thought or tugged at your hair when you were frustrated? I noticed those things because we spent all of our time together, not because I was in love with you.”

Anya pursed her lips, “Wow. I think it’s time you leave.”

“What?” He asked dumbfounded.

“Please leave, Mikel. Maybe it’s a good thing you’re moving to San Francisco. You’re right, we’ve spent all of our time together, and maybe we need to learn how to live apart. But word of advice...when you finally come to your senses and realize that I was the one person you were meant to be with, it will be too late. I wish you the best, truly.” The tears had stopped spilling from here eyes, and all she felt was emptiness.

“Anya...please...let’s not leave it like this. I can’t go knowing you’re mad at me.” He tired to reach for her, but she pulled away.

“I’m not mad, Mikel. I am happy for you, truly. Let me know when you’ve safely made it to San Fran, okay?” She edged him out the door, leaving him with a perplexed expression.

———————

It has been nearly three years and Anya’s thoughts would often drift to Mikel and wonder how his life was treating him in San Francisco. She had still followed him on social media and saw he had meet someone and was engaged to be married. She was happy for him, and although it took her time, she found happiness herself.

It was evident as she rubbed her swollen stomach, wincing as the baby in her belly kicked her bladder.

She had gone on and made several successful documentaries, meeting her fiancé on one of her research trips. She was in the process of editing her current project when a knock on her front door pulled her from her work. She waddled toward her front door, shooing the barking dogs away. Anya grasped her brass doorknob and pulled the large oak door open. There standing on her front porch was a ghost from her past.

“Mikel?””

So...what y’all think?? Good or no? Ahhh okay

[mercatorantique]

aesthetic tag! 

tagged by @seungchris

tagging:  yall dont have to do it but ! @banghans @kimatas @djxiao @chrrysoda @utunes @itzmidzy n if anybody else wants to feel free to say i tagged u!

rules: bold the aesthetics you relate to and add twenty of your own aesthetic qualities for others to bold

soft

baby pink | iridescent | glitter is always a good option | no bra | minimalistic tattoos | cherry patterns | sweet scented perfumes | wearing generous amounts of blush | doodling hearts | getting excited to pet an animal | fun nails | rewatching old barbie movies | hair sticking to glossed lips | heart shaped sunglasses | taking pictures of the sunset or sunrise | stuffed animals | protecting nature | stickers everywhere | teen movies | the light rain that falls from a clear sky at the beginning of the night

dark academia

neutral tones | masculine outfits | studying languages | worn down copy of books | grey skies | turtleneck sweaters | loose fitting pants | hair tied with a silk ribbon | trying to remember a cool difficult word you read somewhere to use in a convo | thick belts | minimal makeup | windows fogged by rain | vintage jewelry | blouses with cuffed sleeves | reading a murder mystery and trying to solve it | oxford style shoes | sweater vests | subtitled old movies in a language you don’t speak | leaves crackling as you walk | annotating books to express your emotions about the story

edgy

closet full of dark clothes | fishnet tights | makeup sweating off | neon signs | searching for unknown songs | chokers | band tees | doodling on old converses | finding smoking aesthetically pleasing but not doing it | weird humor | accidentally very dramatic | dim lights | layered outfits | chain belts | chipped nail polish | messy hair | low quality pics | piercings | combat boots | scribbling on desks

seventies

colorful wardrobe | doodling flowers | wearing short shorts | using a bikini top or bra as a normal top | listening to ABBA | flowers in your hair | diy-ing everything | jamming to songs alone in your room | drunkenly telling your friends you love them | patterned bandanas | mid heeled shoes | messy braids | flared sleeves | walking barefoot on grass or sand | bold sunglasses | the good kind of tired you get after doing something you enjoy for hours | feeding stray animals | fun patterned socks | room decorated with succulents and other plants | likes to go roller skating or skateboarding

preppy casual

collared clothes | drinking juice out of a champagne glass | getting excited to see the met gala looks | thick headbands | small pastel cardigans | making your friends take your ootd pics | plaid mini skirts | tweed two pieces | watching reality tv to pass time | frilly tops | watching old hollywood movies | academically driven | long manicured nails | new year’s eve fireworks | colorful tights | layered golden jewelry | yearns for luxury brand items | decorating your room with fairy-lights | cursive and neat handwriting | lace details

cinanamon - steph

gold jewelry, slowdancing in the kitchen with a lover, sun on skin, red-tinted lip balm, lazy mornings, getting lost in foreign cities, scent of bakeries, high-waisted jeans, kissing someone’s neck, writing reminders on your wrist, sleeping in braids to have waves in the morning, growing an herb garden, gentle touches, sketches tucked between pages, flushed cheeks, tandem bikes, floating in a pool, vintage gold hand-mirror, deer grazing, softly singing while doing chores

jaesmintea - dia

oversized everything | painted nails | fairy lights | dozing off in the middle of class | tying hair up into a ponytail | round glasses | laughing so hard you can’t breathe | late night study sessions | tender hand holding | impromptu photoshoots | drowning in moondust | bathing in the light of the sunset | strawberry flavored lollipops | polaroid pictures | eagerly tugging someone down the street | handwritten love letters | smell of coffee | living with reckless abandon | crinkled pages of a journal | replaying the same part in a song over and over

naptimetea - helena

everything black | rewearing your favorite outfit | drawing late into the night | rewatching favorite shows | the bread isle | minty lip balm | falling asleep anywhere and everywhere | making green tea | useless questions when it’s 2 am | forehead kisses | sleeping in till the afternoon | love of pink | staying up to watch the sunrise | dancing in the bathroom | messy handwriting | pile of sketchbooks | talking for hours about interest | old sentimental stuff animals | hanging out on the bed and doing nothing | thick fluffy blankets

jeonginks

the thrill of leaning your body way over a balcony’s edge | the suffocating feeling when the strong wind blows down your lungs | tip-toeing barefoot | hair ruffling and cheek pinching | hugging a body pillow at night | facing the sky with closed eyes | the whimsical silence when it’s past midnight and you’re the only person awake | when you can physically feel your eyes soften when you look at someone | dancing alone with only an oversized shirt | when your sweater falls over your thighs as you stand up | humming scary but memorable lullabies | vivid imagination | w-sitting with a mini skirt and thigh high socks | heated laptop on your lap | cereal at 3 am | gliding your fingers across your thighs | bittersweet melancholy | withdrawn and distant eyes | very tight belts | wanting love but not believing in it | not cruel but not kind

scxrlettwxtches

listening to a song and remembering the times you used to listen to it on repeat | imagining yourself living in any other life than the one you have now | crop tops and high waisted jeans | forgetting to smile but not actually being upset | nuzzling your face in the crook of their neck | back hugs when you’re stressed | turning in assignments 1 minute before they’re due | wanting a relationship but getting scared the moment you’re in one | pretending that you don’t care when inside you’re burning with doubts and fears | the sound of the evening waves as you lie on the sand | lying in your bed listening to your sad playlist | exhaustion but you can’t sleep | singing loudly when you’re the only one home | feeling safe and comfortable with that person in your life | knee high suede black boots with your black winter coat | comfort over appearance | writing essays at 2 am | creative peak from 1 am to 4 am | the one that always ends up walking in the back of a friend group

hyunsracha - sav!

split-dye hair | female rappers | staying up until 6am and sleeping until 1pm | taking notes on an ipad | middle school emo music | mini skirts | late night drives | rain on the ocean | flirting with people when you’re bored | doc martens | eating ramen in the pot | afraid of being looked at | fishnets | getting joy out of making people laugh | small tattoos | crying yourself to sleep | peppermint everything | desperate for freedom | chipped black nail polish

lveletters

well-worn converse | ginger ice cream | farmers’ markets | amaretto in coffee | the sound of pen on paper | empty mountain trails | black and white photographs | vintage bicycles | roads trips with no destination | overfilled bookcases | a shoebox full of ticket stubs | granny smith apples | orange gerbera daisies | cardigan sweaters | games that tell a story | red wine in a mason jar | succulent gardens | tattoos of birds | fresh-baked muffins | a favorite pair of jeans

dnceracha - sydni

black chelsea boots | chapped lips | browline glasses | losing yourself in video games | impressionist art | pink peonies | writing down anything you need to remember | the smell of gasoline | business goth style | dangly earrings | florals | ballet flats | cuffed jeans | liking the villain | a stack of journals | generous amounts of highlighter | knives | rain on a tin roof | heavy footsteps | small-town diners

seungchris - tessa

1am coffee |  small of fresh baked cookies |  lazy morning cuddles |  craft beer | corner booth in a local diner |  video games till 4am | strained vocals in songs | soft yellow lighting |  fresh mint |  loud synth bass with sweet vocals |  fuzzy photos |  squished cheeks |  long hugs | childhood stuffed animals | cat laying on your chest |  blasting music going to country roads | chocolate espresso beans |  white beat-up converse |  6-year-old worn sweaters |  hand-made gifts

gutenyang - luca

a game over screen playing its melancholy music in the darkness | being so full of love you start choking on it even though it has nowhere to go | being so drained of love that everything runs together | hazy memories as if they’re no longer your own | wet ink staining the palms of your hands | teeth glinting in the dim light, are those really so sharp? | getting lost in a campfire, the voices of your friends laughter and singing fading out as you stare | home-grown roses and lavender and lilies | the burn in your lungs after a good long scream | the ringing in your ears after seeing your favorite artist in concert, live, feeling the vibrations in your very soul | a smile shared between two...not lovers, but impossibly intertwined regardless | the fascination with catholic imagery and disgust with everything else | a ballroom in the modern era | lips against skin, a kiss and a secret whispered | a leather jacket so loaded with pins and patches that it says more about the owner than any words can describe | a bassline so melodic it catches you off guard, sweeps you off your feet | laughter for laughter’s sake | reading between the lines and only praying someone reads between yours as well | that one knife that says ‘jopping’