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LET IT SNOW
Paige Bueckers x reader In which Paige and reader spend a snowy day babysitting reader's niece and nephew (loosely based on a request i got weeks ago) Warnings: fluff, suggestiveish? very very very sweet, will make you sick (fluff is very hard for me to write ok be nice) Wordcount: 2.9K A/C: happy christmas eve everyone <3 this is my christmas present to y'all so enjoy this while i take some time to rest and spend time with my family :) unfortunately that means you gotta wait for chapter 2 of so it goes for a little longer but i want to take a break for a few days from writing over christmas! i hope you understand. everyone who celebrates christmas pls spend it eating, drinking (if you're of age), and don't kill your family pls (i know that's much to ask over the holidays let's be real). i'll return to writing so it goes post christmas! MERRY CHRISTMAS GUYS <3
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“There’s a list of allergies on the fridge, if Mia throws a fit just put her in the stroller and walk her around for a bit, if she won’t calm down call me. Whatever you see in the fridge you can eat, and call me whenever! I’ll have my ringer up and-”
“Chloe-”
“and really call me whenever you need to! And have your ringer up too!”
“Chloe!”
Your aunt’s husband is pulling on her arm, trying to get her further than the front door but 10 minutes have already been spent going through everything for the day.
“Auntie Chlo we’ve babysat before. They’re in good hands,” you reassure, smiling brightly at her. She inhales deeply and chuckles when she realises how long she’s been rambling for.
“You’re right, the kids love you. Especially you Paige, they’ve missed you. Been showing them clips of your games!” Your aunt says, head tilting upwards to look at the blonde girl standing behind you, hands wrapped around your waist.
You and Paige had been dating for over a year now, celebrating your first of what would be many anniversaries. In that short amount of time the blonde had made her way into the depths of your closest circle, becoming a part of your family. It happened effortlessly, the way she fit into your life, the way she clicked with your relatives. You swore they loved her more than you at this point. This was about to be the first Christmas she ever spent with your family, and just the idea of her with all your loved ones made your chest fill with warmth.
So when your aunt Chloe called you in a crisis on Christmas Eve, her babysitter getting sick at the last minute, you and Paige were quick to agree to look after your nearly 2-year-old niece Mia and 7-year-old nephew Leo.
“Go! We got this aight,” Paige reassures, resting her chin on the top of your head as she does.
Pulled away by her husband, your auntie waves goodbye and closes the door, leaving you and Paige alone with the kids standing behind you. Before you can even react, Mia’s lower lip begins to quiver, the sight of her mother gone upsetting the small child.
“Uh oh,” you mumble, Paige swiftly making her way to the little girl and picking her up, pouting her own lower lip to mirror the child.
“Are you sad because you miss mama? She’ll be back later, I promise,” Paige coos to Mia, rocking her in her arms. She’s wearing a white t-shirt despite the snow outside, for some reason she was always warm, and her biceps were growing more prominent as she held the child by her hip. The sight of Paige comforting your niece made your heart flutter, making it hard to tear your eyes away. watching Mia bury her face into the crook of Paige’s neck.
“We’ve got a really fun day planned for you!” You gleam at both of the children, ruffling Leo’s hair. He laughs but pushes your hand off, running to the kitchen.
“Can I have a cookie?” The boy asks, clearly taking advantage of the moment that his parents’ watchful eyes weren’t around.
“No-” you start but Paige is already following him to the kitchen. She was such a pushover, always had been with the kids. Just some pouting, eyes batting and she was ready to bend every which way for them.
“Paige!” You complain as the blonde easily reaches to the top shelf, grabbing a jar of chocolate chip cookies.
“What?” She asks unbothered by your scolding, handing a cookie to Leo, and taking a bite of one herself. “Wanted a cookie,” she mumbles, her mouth full.
“Cookie! Gimme!” Mia babbles, short hands reaching for the cookie your girlfriend is holding between her teeth.
“Oh good God…” you groan, rubbing your forehead, already knowing this was going to be a long day if the kids had the blonde wrapped around their finger this much already. But when Mia giggles as Paige feeds her a part of the cookie, you decide not to care. If there was a time to spoil the kids it was on Christmas Eve.
“C’mere,” Paige nods you over, grabbing another cookie. You scurry into the kitchen, grabbing Mia from her and kissing the little girl’s forehead. She giggles brightly, clearly in a much better mood. You nuzzle your nose into her soft cheek, eliciting more laughs from the baby. The whole time Paige can’t look away even for a second, her heart fluttering with affection. Paige was completely in love with you, and seeing you like this only made her feel it more.
“What are we gonna dooo all day?” Leo interrupts the moment, yanking on Paige’s shirt. She grins and ruffles his hair affectionately. Leo and Paige had bonded quickly the first time they met, and now they’re best friends. In fact Leo facetimes Paige weekly on your aunt’s phone.
“We’ve got some ideas.” The blonde says smirking.
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The weather is perfect, the gentle winter sun not warming but making everything brighter as the rays reflect off the snow. Snowflakes fall softly from the sky, adding to the already covered ground as you walk behind Leo and Paige, holding Mia in your arms, trying to catch your breath as you climb on top of a hill.
“Isn’t this high enough?” You ask, glancing down, worrying that Leo would be too scared to get on the sled. Predictably so, the two in front of you look over their shoulders, immediately uttering the word “no” in unison
“Auntie Paigey and your big brother have gone cray cray,” you murmur to the babbling Mia, wrapped in her warmest winter gear.
“Okay, here’s good!” Paige says, finally putting the sled she was carrying down, looking around the group.
“You wanna go first Leo?”
Suddenly the boy looks down, hesitating. It’s pretty steep, especially at first. You could tell he felt unsure, but Paige noticed it too.
“I’m actually lowkey scared, can we ride down together?” She asks, covering for the boy. For a moment your eyes meet with hers, wanting nothing more but to kiss her right now. Paige always had you weak in the knees, but the way she skillfully handled kids only made you love her more.
“Okay we can go together I guess,” Leo complains, deep down relieved. They sit down on the sled, Paige behind the boy, ready to steer.
“Wait!” She yelps, turning to you, blinking fast. “Kiss for good luck.”
Apparently she’d been feeling the same about the kiss.
Humming, you place Mia down on the ground to play with the snow, leaning close to Paige. Her warm lips press into yours, in a loving, gentle peck that let you know she wanted to do so much more, if it wasn’t for the company.
“Yuck!” Leo whines, making both of you giggle.
“Hey, have some respect for your auntie,” Paige grins and pushes the sled forward. Suddenly they’re riding down at such speed you can barely watch. Someone was bound to get hurt.
Both of them scream as the speed accelerates, the sounds echoing in the air. To your surprise they both make it all the way down safe and sound, Paige stopping the sled and jumping off.
“That was so fast!” Leo chuckles hysterically, making your girlfriend laugh too. You could hear them laughing all the way up where you were standing.
“Ball,” Mia babbles, pointing at a pile of snow. Giggling, you sit down on the ground next to her, beginning to roll one snowball after the other and handing them to the girl.
“Look Mia!” You gasp to get her attention. Her wide eyes turn to you, long eyelashes fluttering as she watches. You throw a snowball into the air, Mia’s eyes following as it crashes to the ground. Immediately she claps, a wide smile on her face to reward your efforts.
“Babe it’s your turn,” Paige’s voice says as she’s climbing up, trying to catch her breath.
You scoff, continuing to play with the snow for Mia. “Not happening P,”
“Oh you’re scared huh?” The blonde teases, a smug smirk spreading across her face.
Leo gasps. “It’s not scary at all! I was scared at first too!”
You roll your eyes, not falling for their games.
“I’m playing with my girl here, you boys leave us alone,” you say, poking your tongue out at your girlfriend. She scoffs loud, walking over to you and wrapping her arms around your waist, lifting you up and throwing you over her shoulder with ease.
Leo laughs loud, pointing at the two of you. “Paige is not a boy!”
“Let me down!” You yelp, kicking your legs and arms but it’s no use. She’s much too strong, carrying you towards the sled. Your squeals make Mia laugh loudly, a wide smile spread on her face.
“Look after your sis for a bit, aight?” Paige tells Leo, placing you down on the sled. You’re still giggling, shaking your head.
“I’m not gonna! It’s scary!” You laugh, the blonde sitting snug behind you on the sled, wrapping her legs around you.
“Don’t be such a wuss,” she teases, her arms wrapping over your waist. Leaning in, you feel her hot air tickling against your ear as she whispers. “I gotchu ma, don’t worry.”
With that, Paige pushes off the snowy ground, holding onto you tight. Quickly the speed picks up, fluttering in the pit of your stomach. The freezing cold air tingles against your skin and your eyes water from the cold as you laugh.
“Ahhh P-“ you scream, turning your gaze backwards and finding that, to your shock, the blonde behind you is pushing on the ground to make you go even faster. “STOP!”
Paige giggles into your ear, her arms wrapping around you tight to hold you close. Soon it’s over as you reach the base of the hill, the speed finally slowing down and flutters in your abdomen disappearing.
“Told you it wasn’t so scary,” the blonde grins, helping you up.
“Uh yes it was,” you laugh, grabbing a handful of snow and throwing it at the girl in front of you. Some of it gets onto her face, making Paige pause.
Her mouth turns into a tight smile and her blue eyes widen. Immediately you know you’re in trouble.
“Oh it’s like that huh?” She says and you squeal, already beginning to run when she starts to throw the powdery snow all over you.
“No no no no please!” You can barely breathe, gasping for air and trying to run, the snowy ground making your steps heavy. Paige, being a D1 athlete, easily reaches you.
“Oh so now you regret it!” She laughs, snow falling into your coat, down your neck, making you scream louder as the girl chasing you wraps her arms around your waist, spinning you in the air.
“Stop! Paige!”
“Say please,” she orders, her tone lighthearted.
You roll your eyes, hating having to admit defeat, but knowing it must be done.
“Fine! Please, please stop Paige please,” you whine, batting your wide eyes at the girl. She looks at you, finally putting you down and kissing your forehead.
“Wanna hear you just like that later,” she whispers the dirty words into your ear, lips brushing against your skin, tingling. Before you can scoff or tell her off, Mia’s loud cry disrupts the moment.
Both you and Paige hurry up the hill, towards Leo who’s holding his sister, bouncing him gently to soothe the little girl.
“What happened?” You ask, swiftly scooping Mia from the boy and trying her cheeks to see if she was cold. Nope, perfectly toasty from all the layers.
“Nothing! She just started crying!”
But then, studying her face, you notice the redness of her eyes, her mittened hands trying to rub them desperately.
“Aw, she’s sleepy,” Paige says, like reading your mind, grabbing the sled.
“We should probably head back, she needs to take a nap,” you murmur, trying to soothe the girl in your arms, ear-piercing screams and cries spilling from her mouth.
All four of you hurry to the car, but no attempts to calm Mia down help. She’s exhausted, plump bottom lip quivering as she keeps crying the whole drive home. You could feel yourself getting exhausted, the loud noise becoming overwhelming and stressful. Paige could see it too, the way you were sighing and taking deep breaths. So when you return to the house, she grabs your hand and kisses it before getting up from the car.
“I’ll take her to bed okay? You rest ma,” she murmurs. Relief spreads all over your chest and you smile affectionately.
“How’d I get so lucky?” You ask.
“Nah, I’m lucky. Got the best girl in the entire world.
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After an hour of the faint sounds of Paige’s lullabies (off-key but she would never admit that) and trying to reason with the 2-year-old like that might help, the cries eventually quiet down. Leo is resting too, playing in his room. You’ve been in the kitchen, making spaghetti for all of you. Checking the clock you realise it’s been about 30 minutes since you last heard any sound from Mia, yet Paige still hadn’t returned downstairs.
Quietly, you sneak your way up the stairs, ever so carefully opening the door into the bedroom to not wake up Mia. But what you find makes your heart flutter - in the dimmed out room, Paige and Mia are both asleep, your girlfriend holding the little girl close. The blonde’s mouth is slightly ajar, soft snores escaping through. For a moment you just watch, allowing the love you felt for them both to spread. You walk over, make sure they’re both covered up by the blanket before sneaking back out, leaving them in bed.
“Leo, come eat dinner soon, ok?” You whisper to him in the other room. His eyes lighting up, the little boy gets up holding a toy dinosaur and follows you downstairs.
“Can I watch The Grinch while I eat? Please please please!” He begs, giving you puppy eyes.
“Mmkay, just this once,” you bend to his will, setting it all up for him. You can’t help but watch Leo getting snuggled up on the couch, a blanket around him, eyes wide staring at the TV. Leaning against the arch into the living room, you feel your body tired from the day, muscles aching and mind exhausted. But your insides are fluttering with warmth, no other word for the specific feeling but pure joy. Walking back into the kitchen you begin to make your own plate of food.
You let your mind wonder, and maybe it’s risky. It’s much too soon to be thinking anything close to it. But since it’s Christmas, you let yourself. Your mind comes up with vivid images of you and Paige, in a house of your own, decorating the tree - Paige the only one tall enough to place the star on top. You can see you two baking cookies and watching Christmas movies, hot chocolate in bed.
And maybe, just maybe eventually, two children of your own. There are flutters in your heart thinking about building snowmen with your little family, roasting marshmallows in the fireplace, dressing them up in tiny costumes and sending family postcards to your relatives and friends. It felt so far away, yet you could see it so vividly.
As if she had heard your thoughts, suddenly warm hands land on your waist, Paige’s reflection appearing in the window in front of you. Humming, her front presses flush to your back, fitting against you just right.
“I fell asleep,” she murmurs, burying her nose into your hair and inhaling. It’s like heaven, after a long day, to feel her like this again.
“I noticed,” you reply, beginning to make a plate for the girl as well. She watches closely, following every movement from behind you until her lips find your neck, beginning to press soft, loving kisses along the nape of it.
Eyes fluttering shut, you hum, turning your head to face the blonde behind you. Hand reaching for your jaw, she pulls you into a gentle kiss, lips sliding against yours slowly. “Can’t wait to see you be a mom,” Paige whispers against your mouth, chest heaving.
A deep blush sets on your cheeks hearing the words, taking them in. The blonde watches your reaction, clearly trying to read you.
“I’m sorry if that’s too much to say this early but I-”
“No,” you shake your head with a smile. “I can’t wait for that either.”
Relief washes over your girlfriend, as she pecks your lips once more.
“We’re gonna be so good ma, best parents in the world.”
Beaming with joy, both you and Paige walk into the living room where Leo is sitting, eyes glued to the movie.
“Yo! Scooch!” Paige tells the boy, who shuffles to the corner of the couch. Both you and your girlfriend sit in the opposite corner, holding your bowls of spaghetti and getting settled. The blonde quickly wraps an arm around you, pulling you to lean against her side. You’re snuggled up, feeding bites of food to each other and stealing kisses whenever the boy isn't watching.
“I love you,” Paige whispers into your ear, blue eyes sparkling with adoration.
“I love you too Paige,” you whisper back, cheeks rosy and heart fluttering from the perfect snowy day.
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taglist: @xxloveralways14 @bueckersfive @sierrale8ne @thaatdigitaldiary @lovegalor333 @lupinqs @rosemariiaa @janaelalfysblunt @d3arapril @vamptizm
#paige bueckers#lilas writing#paige bueckers x reader#paige bueckers fluff#paige bueckers fic#paige bueckers fanfiction#wnba x reader
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anthropomorphic bicycle in taur format? it has been done.
Superbike from Fairly Odd Parents (Season 2, Episode 7: "Super Bike")
originally aired in 2002
What do you all think would be the most structurally unsound species to turn into a furry taur.
#re-reading this and you probably saw the character already#oh well#art by op#i don't think it's a good idea to tag a post “sonic” and “furry fandom” and “Transformers”#that would do a number on the recommendations on the For You page#fairly oddparents#i'm not really adding much here#i spent more than minute on it i'll post it
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devil marbly carbly ft me trying to figure out how to draw all of them in real time
(the dubstep weed jacking off shirt is from a meme i would source if i uh. remembered it sorry </3)
#there's a lot of little gags i'd recommend zooming in#also it's so weird how the first two dantes look Nothing like the rest of these pages. call it a warmup ig#also nero fuck you.mp4 i spent like 40 minutes trying to figure out how to draw dmc5 nero#my dmc4 nero didn't look That much like him but i was drowning with dmc5 nero trust me#anyway i had to draw some more dante on the last page bc even though he got a whole page most of it was like. bleh#for the sake of figuring out how to draw him not bleh. so i needed to draw him not bleh. :p#dmc#devil may cry#dante sparda#nero sparda#vergil sparda#eva sparda#nico dmc#lady dmc#trish dmc#v dmc#dmc5#dmc4#dmc3#pls excuse the shit lighting i am. figjting for my very life against directional lighting okay#this contains a lot of the little thoughts i had about dmcs 3-5 that i never posted about so. enjoy <3#skrunkart#a little nero x kyrie. as a treat#does kyrie have much going on as a character? no. do i think they're cute anyway? yes#i took the most liberties w trish and im pretty sure it's bc i was tired more than anything#these adhere pretty strongly to their game designs. in time i'll add details that make em mine#but this is a study (hence all the notes)#also this ended off a sketchbook ive spent like 1.5 yrs on (which is unprecedentedly long for me like it's Crazy it took that long)#so hoorayy
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this is a general point but one thing i find to be really frustrating from non-talia fans is the automatic condescension and assumption of unintelligence as if talia fans are idiots who believe morrison is the only writer who has ever been racist to her and like we don't dwell on the issues in her writing across history wholesale because we tend to know it like the back of our hand. obv morrison is the most prevalent writer in talia discourse bc their work has been the most damning for her. there's no erasing what they did to her character bc dc will never erase damian's existence nor will they ever be willing to change his origins to account for her original characterization bc he's the more popular character by miles
but that's not to say that these discussions about other racist stereotypes and misogyny attributed to her portrayals from other writers aren't prevalent within talia fan circles. the above post is only one example of the assumptions made about her fans (although it's a common accusation) but i honestly find it quite laughable bc any talia fan who is dedicated to understanding her history and maintaining her character integrity is well aware that dixon's work on her in the 90s and early 00s is nothing short of terrible. it is her most prominent dragon lady portrayal prior to morrison's and you would be hard pressed to find a talia fan who actually enjoys any of those portrayals or believes they did her character any service. the thing op and so many others seem to ignore is that writers from tower of babel and onward more or less forgot about these arcs or talia's part in them bc her impact was so inconsequential. there's not even a hint of the talia who was power hungry to be her father's heir or sexually assaulted by bane in the portrayals written by waid and early 00s superman comics (although you can obv argue about whether ignorance of her trauma from the bane arc was a good thing). so ofc we don't complain about it as much bc it didn't have any long lasting effects on her character (unless you want to count her portrayal in the dark knight rises, but i think even that was egregious enough for the most wormbrained fans to recognize it was a disservice to her)
and i am always incredibly fascinated by the number of people who like to dress up the o'neil era the way op did bc it's an immediate tell for who's actually read her comics and who hasn't. there's certainly things to be said about the al ghuls and the fu manchu stereotypes o'neil and adams drew from to create the daddy-daughter duo, but no one who criticizes their holistic portrayals here ever seems to actually understand the nature of their crimes in this era or that this is perhaps the most tame ra's has ever been before writers in the 80s and 90s took his ecofascism to new heights. the ra's of the 70s is highly suspicious and wealthy and entitled, but most of his crimes are so vague and far flung they can't even be categorized as anything concrete. half the time he's fighting for control over the league more than he is actually making strides in ecofascism, which is what writers like mike w. barr more specifically dedicated themselves to portraying. it's also notable that one of the last stories o'neil wrote for the al ghuls in this era featured ra's and bruce cooperating to save the entire planet from a deadly chemical. ra's was an ecofascist at origins but very few people seem to understand or care that he was built with standards for himself and didn't believe in mass murdering humanity despite all of its crimes against the earth. that's a nuance that writers seem to have lost over the years and obv the every day batman fan isn't going to care about them lol
even beyond the ra's portrayal though it's interesting how talia gets tied so closely into his alleged "crimes" from this era bc unless her father is under threat or imprisoned talia doesn't play much of an active role in his criminal plotting at all. if anything that's a criticism talia fans have of o'neil's work bc while she's portrayed to be incredibly intelligent and possessive of a unique concept of loyalty, her role during this era doesn't really go beyond the bounds of henchwoman or on some occasions bystander. but the highlight of these portrayals is that in the rare moments that she is an active player, it's always to do the right thing and protect an innocent. talia is very staunchly anti murder and only inclined towards the act when people she cares about are threatened (like in her very first portrayal where she shot darrk to protect bruce, and even then, you can tell that murder wasn't her intent, and the man may have survived had he not fallen onto the train tracks; there is also her almost-murder of a man in daughter of the demon when she believes he's killed ra's, but once bruce tells her ra's is actually alive she relents. you can criticize her for that still if you're inclined to but the notable thing about it is that talia is not driven to murder as a prerogative unless extremes present themselves). o'neil explicitly designates her as a pacifist who is only chained to ra's out of a slavish devotion which other writers obv build on in later decades to help her ultimately evolve out of the role. but all too often non-talia fans take the bond girl ambience and surface matter of these stories to designate her as an entitled, heartless war criminal bc that's already the way they have of her from modern work, projected back onto work from the past. there's no room to see the nuances in her writing in earlier comics bc her future has already damned her
this is personally why i think paying attention to writers when building a concept of character history is so impt. swaths of issues get jumbled together to act as one conglomerate on a character but there's a plethora of nuances and shifts in tone and portrayal to notice when the work of different writers is distinguished from each other and analyzed. and that holds esp true for non-white characters whose trajectory can shift so suddenly bc of the biases of a writer
#talia al ghul#ra's al ghul#personal essays#well. i sacrificed going to school early to study for this. property reading i'll be leaving a measly ten minutes for you#but yeah lol this post in particular severely peeved me but it's also a general floating sentiment i have seen from a LOT of non talia fans#in general with non white dc characters but esp the dragon lady victims people really do not seem to care about#distinguishing their history at all. like it's all one broad brushstroke none of these people actually read each issue and differentiate#and it's like. BITCH. i have spent hours overanalyzing these issues more than you ever could have please sit down (derogatory)
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Astarion Baldurs Gate 3 Isn't A TumblrSexyMan™, He's Just A SexyMan™
I've seen a large number of people, most of whom are in the Astarion Disliker/"I don't get it" camp most who are not on this particular hell site, cite Astarion as Tumblr's latest sexyman. Today, I will be explaining why I do not believe that to be the case. That instead, as the title states, he's just a sexyman.
No real knowledge of the hell site is required, I'll explain things for the new people.
Setting The Definitions
First, definitions because this is now Intro to Writing and Rhetoric. A sexyman would be anyone, usually masc or a man, who is concidered sexy by a wide range of people. Fascinating.
A Tumblr Sexyman, on the other hand, is a thing - usually fictional entity - that is incredibly popular on Tumblr.com to the degree it escapes it's fandom sometimes, in the most extreme of cases, becoming far more popular than it's original fandom. It is characterized by a few major characteristics. Ranging from Twinkism* (be it the character or fan interpretation), generally unconventionally/perceived to be unconventionally attractive in a non physical sense (character traits that wouldn't otherwise be desirable, like absurd behavior or generally evilness), to impeccable drip (either in the original media/design, or done by fans in fanart).
*note: Twinkism (which I did just throw in on the spot this is entirely bullshit for my own amusement) is the phenomenon of skinny, young looking, pretty/feminine white boys who are within media. This is different from twinks, who are understood to be young and skinny - being pretty, popular, or white is not connected. All those who participate in Twinkism are Twinks, but not all Twinks participate in Twinkism.
Does Astarion Baldurs Gate 3 Fit The Definition?
First rule: must be at least a twink. Is he?
No. Yes. Kinda. In a way. Many people would describe Astarion as someone who's gone through "Twink Death". No this is not because he's literally undead. Twink Death, in it's simplest form, is when a twink no longer looks young and/or feminine. Astarion has aged. His crows feet and laugh lines, while beautiful, do not make him look 18. For some this would disqualify him from being a Twink. So perhaps he has failed at the first step.
I, however, am not satisfied with that. Moving on, is Astarion - or would Astarion - actually be considered conventionally unattractive in any way that is disconnected from his appearance? I argue no. Vampires are considered very well, normal to lust after. They're right below succubus on the "This isn't considered weird to find attractive" scale. You aren't romancing The Emperor here. Outside of that he's well groomed, shown to be muscular in game (headcanon does often disagree and while I wish it was true we are working with facts for this specific discussion), and an elf. In personality, while not for everyone, he's the pretty standard fruity sarcastic gay who's a bit selfish. We all know a fruity sarcastic gay who's a bit selfish, and they get laid. So it can't be considered that bad. Probably.
I feel important to note here that I am aroace and have no idea what I'm talking about right now. This is an educated guess.
Astarion has lost now, two for two. He's barely a twink, even going off of his model he's more a twunk. He definitely doesn't fit the Twinkism phenomenon. He's not weird to find attractive, I assume, so what else is there? His drip? I'm sorry, but his base outfit is a bit well Goofy to say the least. Much fanart leaves him in this outfit or a simpler version because drawing ruffles is enough to make anyone want to willingly jump headfirst into the underdark, so he fails the drip test as well.
His final hurtle: is his popularity Tumblr™. In this context Tumblr™ is different from Tumblr. Tumblr™ is the fandom side, where a sexyman would flourish and find their own fandom. Importantly, this fandom needs to be very insular to the site. It's a *Tumblr* sexyman after all. So that begs the question, is Astarion highly liked by mostly or purely Tumblr people/those who have the vibes of a Tumblr user? No.
Astarion is well loved by many people of various vibes. He has affected (previously) straight men on Reddit. Few can escape him and his 10 charisma.
Conclusion
Astarion is just a sexyman. He's just a fictional character that many think is neat and attractive for a variety of reasons. He's the Ryan Reynolds of crpgs. He's some dude, who's generally considered attractive by a lot of people who you both would and wouldn't expect to find him attractive.
#This only matters because when he's inevitably included in a Tumblr sexyman thing that's probably not even on here I'll know that I spent#30 minutes writing a weird essay thing about why he isn't really a Tumblr sexyman#look forward to receiving this link poor souls who decided to be my friend. ive converted all of you to Astarion fans so actually youll like#it probably. im such a good influence#astarion#bg3#baldurs gate 3#baldurs gate 3 spoilers#purely because i mentioned the emperor#astarion ancunin#baldurs gate posting#im so sorry to anyone who actually read this genuinely why. if this gets more than 2 notes im going to be homicidal#also F for my followers who dont care about bg3 sorry besties.
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#Seven's Public Diary#vent#vent post#cw vent#cw vent post#can i go more than a fucking week without having my cptsd triggered again? pLEASE???#me and my haywire nervous system can't ever catch a fucking break i swear to god#at least i managed to get the Matt fic posted before that happened and ruined my night#literally three minutes after i hit post. something has to happen IRL and ruin my slight good mood. sigh. anyways#my chest still feels tight but my focus is coming back i think. lets hope the rest of the night is uneventful#anyways. uh. positives. got the Matt fic posted on here And Ao3! yay. after working on it the last two evenings it's officially done#i know i put way too much effort into my fics especially ones that will get very little readership but eh i can't help it#time spent doing something you enjoy is never time wasted or however the saying goes#uh oh. the stress injury in my neck is starting to feel tight again. that's probably not a great sign#i should try to relax. been sitting at my desk too much recently and my back's mad abt it too#i would unwind with some Genshin exploration grinding or smthn but that's just more desk sitting time#so hm. animal crossing in bed it is then#watch me say that then spend the next 3 hours on tumblr#i cant help it i want to update my pinned posts and fill my queue up some more#and i have some drafts to work on... still need to finish that Sun & Moon appearance guide for ES#maybe i'll pull an all-nighter. i need to fix my sleep schedule again. like badly. but then i risk a migraine. aaggghhhhhh#anyways this has been Venting and Bad Decision Making 101 thabks for coming to my TED talk#oh hey look at that i got a like on the Matt fic. mood slightly improved. thank u whoever u r <3
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I'm fatigued, my back hurts, I accidentally spent like 3 hours sat downstairs in a chair that made our back feel worse because our executive dysfunction prevented me getting up and going back upstairs even though I only went down there to get one thing, and now I really need to lay down but if I accidentally fall asleep again I feel like I'll wake up, realise I fell asleep and also that I feel like I wasted a big chunk of the day, and I'll end up feeling even worse again
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#posts made on pain meds#I went downstairs to get food but ended up having to wait longer than anticipated which is whatever#but then that meant I ended up sitting down and once we sit down it's like our brain stops being able to process that we can leave#I'll sit there the whole time going ''I need to get up and go back upstairs. I don't want to be sat here'' and just can't get up#I hate that this happens because while I know our executive dysfunction isn't our fault#and it's the exact same issue that stops us eating or drinking or going to the toilet or whatever when we need to#I still feel like I should be able to just get up and do the thing and just leave if I'm in a situation that I don't want to be in#and it's so hard to get other people to understand that I can't ''just leave'' because my brain just won't let that happen#like I want to but my brain won't register it as an actual thing I can do and it feels more like a weird abstract concept#than a thing I could actually do. it's like my brain can't connect the concept of the action to the act of doing it#and then I get frustrated because why can't I just do the thing that I know I should be able to do#and then I've spent hours not doing anything I meant to and mostly just feel like shit because of it and it keeps happening#and now I need to lay down and I know what's likely to happen if I do that#but I do need to listen to my body especially after getting stuck in a situation that makes our pain and fatigue worse#also we had to take pain meds earlier and that's definitely not helping with us feeling shit emotionally about all this#I hate having to navigate our brain and body just not functioning properly#I feel like we've had so little energy lately and it's reminding me too much of this time last year when we had that blood infection#I'm terrified of that happening again because we almost didn't get treatment because we started to assume it was just our new baseline#hmm apparently within like 5 minutes we've gone from ''ugh I wasted 3 hours'' to almost crying over medical trauma#I probably need to try and do something to calm us down but also I'm too tired to really do anything#which brings me right back to the issue that triggered this whole rant and me getting upset in the first place
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:3
#Okkkkk woww idk how to word posts anymore#I thought abt what I wanna say for like 30 minutes and now my brains just empty#ANYWAYS UHHHH Sorry I keep disappearing I can't really help it :3#Depression is biting at my hand and it just wont let go no matter how much I beg it to let go sooooo :3#Being on here just makes me feel blrgh#My everythings been feeling weird too idk#Mmm maybe thats because I feel sick rn but I justttt hhhrghhghrgrhhghh#Welp just spent another like 30 minutes trying to figure out anything more I wanna say and I just can't think of anything so#Yeah that's about it :3#I'll try to be on more even if its for like a few minutes#It'll probably just be for a few minutes bc if I try to be on more than that I might explode :3 /lh /j#If I keep stalling on posting this I'll probably just end up not posting it at all but hrghrgh ANYWAYS#IM SORRY I KEEP DISAPPEARING I'll try to be on more hopefullyyyyy :3#꒰ঌ♡ 𝟽𝟽𝟽.ramble
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Culinary school is to a real service line the same way College prep in High School is to College
Gives you a false impression on how the "real world" works. The moment you step foot on the line the whole "you have to do everything alone" mindset becomes more a hindrance than culinary school leads you to believe.
Don't get me wrong, I get the need to learn all the individual skills yourself to be more prepared, but they pretend like you have to do a whole menu of varying items completely alone when that's just not the case. You are a team that works together and if one falls behind, the rest are there to help pick up the slack. If the person in charge of omelets is overwhelmed, you take some tasks off their hands.
#sorry for the rant#just had to put my thoughts into words somewhere#i figured tumblr wouldnt care because the only people who will probably read this are my mutuals#if they even care to look at that wall of text lol#i see you Rook#how many of these can i put here before someone loses interest?#wall of text part 2 electric boogaloo#i really wanna see the northern lights in person#but everytime they are supposedly visible in my area i only find out after the fact#or its a “maybe at 1am you'll see it” and maybe isnt a good enough reason to be more of a zombie at work#sadge..........#Cloud is now fascinated with our ice machine#when we first got him he was spooked everytime it made a noise#which was about 7-8 minutes#are you still reading?#huh. that's devotion. or curiosity. or you're just reallllly bored#not that I'm one to judge#i was bored enough to convince my brother#to put a Ford F150 add in a build a bear Bidoof#i think it was one of the 2009 ads#do you know that feelin of takin a hot dump at your best friends house#thats the feeling you get driving down the highway on a Ford. All American. F150#i spent my lunch break on this#maybe only one or two people will read this.#hello few curious and bored tumblrinas#i got a really funny (to me) story from work#I'll make that post later though#ah shit only 5 minutes left#adios mis amigos#You're worth more than purest of diamonds. keep shining like one
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My characters for art fight so far (top right image is old)
#I love how I spent 2 hours on the mouse and 25 minutes on Sol#But then I check how much time I spent on Pyre and it's 10 FUCKING HOURS????#dang that's some dedication from me who always has. No motivation#really fits her thumbnail which gushes about how she's my favorite oc#Which she is#she's very important and special and precious to me#more than you all will ever know#art fight#she's a part of my most developed story I've come up with. Ever#it's my favorite story out of all the ones I have ever made#if only you knew how much it has changed for the better over the years#I'll probably make a rant post about that someday
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You asked for some smut suggestions for Logan, and I got one:
So like…I mean…Logan might be on the short side, but he’s still big! I mean, like,,,those hands 🫣 It would be nice to see a fic to do with Logan and a little manhandling. but not like in a BDSM way, more like a “I am very strong, and here’s a little reminder” type way. Might seem kinda silly but I’d enjoy a fic like that lol.
NSFW!Wolverine/AFAB!Reader Ask and you shall receive!! I've spent like the last four days working on this and atp I can't looks at it anymore lol. I'm not super happy with how the beginning is written, but I still think it's alright enough to post lol. It's a lot more tell than show compared to most of my other fics, and I was halfway tempted to reformat it into headcannons, but I didn't feel like it. Anyway, hope you like the way I included the manhandling lol! Hope it turned out okay :) Also, might or might not be tall logan. I'll leave it up to yall to assume, I'm just short af so there's not a single person in marvel who wouldn't have to look down at me lmao.
Edit:FUCK I FORGOT THE READ MORE! TWs: MDNI!!!!!! Seriously, you will be blocked. Masterbation, lil bit of a scent kink. Sexual frustration. Manhandling. Jealous Logan. Creampie. Logan calls you "sunshine" and pretty and shit. I'll add more if I can think of any.
You had a problem. You’ve had a problem. And it really didn’t seem like it was getting any better. It didn’t help the fact that it was incredibly embarrassing, either.
You couldn’t get off. It’s not like you ever struggled with it before, but lately, it felt like you were fighting a losing battle. At first, you didn’t realize why. Maybe it was because you moved into the X-Mansion. Nerves because you’re living somewhere new, right? So you change it up a little. You got comfortable, had a glass of wine or two, and picked up a raunchy book. Yet every time you slipped your hand between your thighs… Running circles around your own clit, trying your best to finger yourself to your finish, you just could never quite hit that peak. It was safe to say you were beyond frustrated.
Lucky for you, most people didn’t notice. You try your best not to be too uptight or mean, but there are just some things that you can’t quite hide from certain people.
Logan’s noticed that something is up with you. You can tell he has, seeing the looks on his face, nose scrunched up in a way he’s catching into something that he just can't quite place. You’re assuming it’s your own pheromones, but hey, as long as he doesn’t realize what it is you’ll be fine, right?
Maybe not.
Eventually, you finally realized why you were having so much trouble getting off. All it took was one training session with Wolverine, and you knew immediately. You weren’t sparring or anything like that, hell, you knew before you even hit the danger room floor. Logan was in a bit of a mood today, although not as grumpy as he can be- and he’s trying to be patient with you. You can tell. But you’re having trouble focusing today- and you have been for a while. He can tell you’re not at 100% just by the way you hold yourself, and spends about 5 minutes watching as you struggle to reset the Danger room panel before he’s finally fed up with it.
“Jesus fuck. Here, let me do it.” Logan grabs you by the waist, pulling you to his chest with one arm as the other reaches around you to reset the panel. It’s not like you didn’t find him attractive before, but the close contact? The smell of his aftershave and the sound of his voice growling in your ear?
oh.
Oh.
You were having trouble getting off because you had a thing for Logan.
You’re practically stunned when he pulls away, standing there with a flushed face and something rather embarrassing pooling in your underwear for the first time in a while. You had to quickly excuse yourself before you ran the risk of him catching onto anything coming from you. He’s a little confused for a second, but you can hear the sound of his low chuckle as you scramble away.
First thing you do? Go to the store.
It's not a random errand. At least, not entirely. You had meant to go out with Storm to grocery shop later this afternoon, but you told her you could really use some time out of the house by yourself, which she completely understood. You had the list and everything, it was only a coincidence that you passed by the cologne section on your way to pick up some toothpaste. The sight made you stop for a minute, the gears grinding in your skull. You spent just a few minutes curiously sampling the bottles until you found one that smelled a bit familiar… Should you? No, that's a bit strange. But really, what was the harm, right? I mean, who would know?
So you bought it. You felt a bit embarrassed afterward, knowing what you bought it for, and ended up letting it sit in the drawer of your side table for a good while. Until another desperate attempt at fucking your own brains out, that is.
You were sweaty and uncomfortable in your bed, sleep shirt sticking to your skin as you struggled to pump your fingers in and out of your tight cunt. It’s been a while, and it shows. You couldn’t even get your favorite dildo to fit inside of you, only adding to your frustration. Touching your clit hardly helped much, leaving you as unsatisfied as ever. Eventually, you give up, lying there as you sigh to yourself. You turn over in your bed in a huff, halfway temped scream your lungs out into the pillow you bury your face in. Instead, you let out something that sounds more like a whisper than a yell, letting the air in your lungs deflate as you let your feelings out. You roll over onto your side when you’re done, halfway tempted to be done with it entirely and go back to bed when you catch sight of the nightstand drawer, slightly ajar. The amber bottle of liquid stares right at you.
You open the drawer some more, picking up the bottle and looking at it as you wonder if you’re actually going to do this. But you’re ridiculously horny, and tired, and you know you’re gonna have trouble falling asleep in the state you’re in- so you end up spraying the smallest amount on your pillow.
It’s…nice. The pillow is warm from where you had been laying on it, and despite how strong men’s cologne could be, this one isn’t quite so striking. At least, not in the amount that you used. You relax back into your bed, pressing your face into the pillow and laying there for a moment. You start thinking about Logan… His calloused hands running across your skin. How his lips and tongue would feel against your own, trailing down your body to your breast. Your hand trails down to your clit as you imagine it as his own. You imagine him behind you, pressing you to the bed as he growls into your ear. You think about what his happy trail would feel like against you. What his cock would look like, feel like, pressing into you. Your legs twitch and shake as you see stars underneath your eyelids, the scent of Logan hitting all the right parts in your head and going straight to your cunt.
Holy shit.
Your orgasm lasts what feels like forever. Your legs are still shaking as you whimper from oversensitivity and pull your hand away, panting as you try to catch your breath. You haven’t cum that hard since… ever. Maybe the cologne was worth it, after all.
You felt really good the morning after. You found yourself humming in the shower, more energized at breakfast and morning drills. No one had said anything, but you knew there were a few who were relieved to see you back to your usual self. If anything, the only person you noticed acting very differently around you was Logan. He was more tense than normal. He scowled a lot, spending less time in your presence. You’d strike up a conversation that would only last a few minutes before he would make an excuse and leave. It made you a little disappointed. But you knew him and knew he had good and bad days, so you brushed it off at first. But a week, two weeks- almost a month went by, and still no change. You felt scorned almost, silently rejected by the guy you had finally realized you were practically in love with, and to be honest, the only man who could get you off just by thinking about him- and boy, did you get off while thinking about him.
You’ve almost resigned yourself to the fact that Logan wasn’t interested when he corners you one morning. He’s leaning up against the wall of the hallway, waiting for you when you step out of your room. It makes you jump a little, closing your door quickly behind you, knowing damn well you hadn’t washed your sheets after fucking yourself to the moon and back last night and fully not wanting the smell to hit his nose. All Logan does is narrow his eyes. Shit.
“Who is he.” He asks you. The question completely derails your train of thought. And you furrow your brow, confused. What was that about?
“Who is he? Your guy?” He asks again, but it does little to clear up your confusion. You’re halfway wondering if he’s being serious at this point, stepping away from your door as you cross your arms.
“What?” You ask. Logan huffs when you respond to him, cocking his head at you in a way that's more sarcastic than curious. The way he’s looking at you is doing some things that you don’t think you’d like to admit, eyes narrow and scrutinizing as you struggle to keep eye contact with him.
“What do you mean? What guy?” You repeat back to him, starting to get a little frustrated. He snorts, rolling his eyes as his scowl lingers. He steps closer, looking down at you from less than a foot away with that angry stare.
“Don’t play stupid with me, sunshine. I can smell him on you.” You ignore the way the nickname makes you shiver a little bit, too busy shrinking into yourself when you process the extent of his words. Smell. He could smell someone on you. Something. Oh god, this was embarrassing.
“Oh! That- It’s not what you're thinking!” You say, face flushed red. You’re flustered beyond belief, doing your best to convince him to leave it be, and it’s not going so well for you.
“Sure it’s not.” Logan huffs. He starts to take steps forward, closing in on your personal space.
“It’s not. I can promise you that.” You’re anxiously fiddling with your fingers now, taking a step back for every step he takes. He looked predatory, unlike any time you’ve seen him before. You haven’t even seen him like this in the danger room, even less so on the battlefield.
“Just tell me who he is.” Logan is adamant about it, his scowl beginning to turn into a frown. Your back hits your door, kickstarting your heart in surprise. You hadn’t realized he had backed you up so far.
“I can’t!” You say, in the beginning stages of becoming absolutely exasperated, and already incredibly embarrassed.
“Why not!?” Logan Snaps, stopping just inches away from you. You cover your heated face, pressing your palms into your eyes until you see shapes, wanting nothing more than to curl up and die right then and there.
“Would you just leave it!” You shout, but Logan’s having none of it.
“No, I won't!” Logan grabs your wrists and moves them away from your face, holding them in front of your chest with a grip lighter than you might have thought. You groan in utter frustration and mortification, looking him dead in the eyes as your angry mouth starts speaking before your reasonable brain can fully catch up.
“Jesus Christ Logan! Do you expect me to just whip out the silicone and show you?!” Your eyes widen as soon as you say it, slamming your mouth shut as you finally catch up with yourself. Logan is staring at you in absolute shock, jaw almost slack at the confession.
“...What?” He asks, slowly. You wince, looking off to the side before deciding it's a bit too late to get the cat back into the bag.
“Its… Cologne. What you’re smelling. I use it to uh, help me…” You make a sort of gesture with your head, praying that you won’t actually have to spell it out for him. He’s still in shock as he looks at you, hands frozen with his fingers wrapped around your wrists. He clears his throat when he comes to, an unreadable expression on his face as he slowly steps forward again, close enough to press his forehead against your own as he presses you against your door.
“You’re that pent up, you need cologne to help you get off?” He asks, and you don’t know what to say, cat catching your tongue as he leans forward. The side of his face brushes against your cheek as he leans down a little, the action making your skin prickle. One of his hands releases a wrist to slide up and across the back of your neck, tilting your head to the side as he takes a big sniff of your skin. He’s practically nuzzling you, angling his head so that he can smell the scent on the back of your head where you rest against your pillow at night.
He’d noticed it before, at night when most of his anger had worn off, sometime after he started to pick up the scent on you. The undertones, the top notes. But now with you this close, he can tell that it wasn’t another man he was smelling. No. It was just you. Your scent being drowned out by the smell of something that he could finally tell smelled rather suspiciously like his very own aftershave.
“...Don’t tell me that you wanted it to smell like me.” He asks after a moment. You almost flinch at the sound of his deep rumble, turning your red face away from him. You swallow, feeling like you are absolutely burning up as you nod- right as Logan catches the unmistakable scent of arousal.
“Fuck”
You’re sure the sound was more animal than man as he cups your cheek rather aggressively, pressing his lips against your own in a rather desperate kiss. It takes you a second to return it, eyes wide as you process just what was happening. It didn't take long for you to melt into his desperate kisses though, every nip and brush of his teeth just like you imagined it would be. He presses his knee in between your thighs, finally releasing your other wrist to grab ahold of your hip instead. You accidentally let out a whine when he grinds your hips against him, your heart beating so fast you were sure it was going to explode. He curses again at the sound, both hands sliding around you to lift you against the door.
You practically squeak in surprise, the noise caught by Logan’s mouth on your own one more time before he trails down to your neck, nipping and sucking at your skin. You gasp as he presses against you, his hips beginning to grind against your own. You’re having a hard time thinking, biting your lip as you do your best to stifle your sounds.
“Logan-ah, can we… head inside, please?” He only grunts in response, shifting your weight as you both begin to fumble for the doorknob. He gets it before you do, hardly stumbling as the door behind you swings open. He’s kissing you again before the door is even closed, kicking it behind him. As preoccupied as you are, you at least have the common sense to reach over and try to lock the door before he carries you over to the bed.
He plops you down onto the mattress before he crawls over you, eyes half-lidded and just as lustful as your own. He pushes you down as you try to sit up. His breathing a little hard, pupils dilated to a size you had never seen.
“Now I know why you closed the door so fast,” Logan smirks, having picked up the lingering scent of your sex on the sheets right away. You open your mouth to reply, but he cuts you off. His tongue snakes into your mouth, and you find that you can’t really remember what you were going to say anyway. He kisses you again and again, distracting you as he reaches above your head. He pulls away when he has the pillow in hand, and you know just by the look on his face that he knows exactly what he is holding.
“Hate to break it to you, but this doesn’t exactly compare to the real thing.” He snarks. It makes you laugh, and for the first time in a while, you see a genuine smile spread across his face.
“Yeah.” You respond, taking the pillow from his hands and tossing it to a far-off corner. “I know.” You could revel in his smile for as long as he’d let you. Logan’s kisses start off sweeter this time, at least for a moment they did. They begin to become more and more rough as hands start to wander and clothes start to come off. His shirt is first to go, your hands running up and down the hair that spans his torso. Logan is quick to remove your shirt and bra in one go, one very small step away from cutting off your clothes entirely. He gives himself a minute to appreciate your breasts, pinching and teasing you by sliding a hand up the middle of your sternum, the back of his hand brushing the side of a tit as he watches you squirm underneath him, arching your back to push your chest out, practically begging him to finally touch you.
“Patience is a virtue, Sunshine.” Logan says, causing you to scoff. You glare at him a little and all it does is make him chuckle a bit.
“Don’t be mean.” You whine. He laughs a bit harder as he finally lowers himself to your chest. He keeps his eyes locked on your own as he brushes the blunt ends of his teeth across the soft skin, but he’s never been the most patient man. It doesn't take him long to give in to you, sucking on each breast individually, massaging the soft skin of the opposite as he does so.
“Careful.” He growls when your own hands begin to wander, touching him over the fabric of his jeans. He releases your nipple with a pop, bearing his teeth as he presses his face back into your neck. You don't pay much mind to that, rather enjoying the grunts and sounds he makes as you slowly stroke his covered hardness from base to tip. You can't imagine how restrained he must be feeling. You can’t help but smirk a little as your hands drift up and down, before oh So slowly unbuckling his belt. Logan is agitated, practically bucking his hips into your hands to get you to just get over with it.
“Patience is a virtue.” You quote, only earning a restraining hold on your hands once again.
“Fuck that.” Logan growls. He holds you by your wrists, pushing them above your head as he uses his free hand to remove his belt and frantically unbuckle his pants. You'd be complaining if it weren't for the view of his straining cock, slapping against his abdomen as he pulls his pants down.
You don't get to stare for too long before he flips you on your stomach like you weigh nothing. He lets your wrists go to pull down your shorts and underwear, a sticky string of your slick thinning as he pulls the items down.
“Fuck. You're this wet from just that?” Logan asks you, taking two fingers and sliding them through your lips from behind, spreading his fingers to let himself see the mess you've made of yourself already.
“...shut up.” You mumble, more focused on the feeling of those very same fingers sliding back and forth across your cunt, the tips just barely brushing against your clit every time. Logan chuckles, sliding one hand under your lower stomach to lift your hips with ease. Your hips buck as he slides a thick finger inside of you without warning, slowly sinking down to his knuckle with ease.
“Might not even need foreplay at this rate.” Logan rumbles behind you, eyes set squarely on the sight of your pretty pussy spread wide open for him. You can only moan in response as he pulls it back out again, plunging a second finger into you this time. Your hands clutch the sheets as Logan begins to finger fuck you to his content, curling those thick digits to hit that one spot juuust right. You try not to buck or squirm too bad, halfway wondering if this is all just some wet dream.
“Logan-” You call out for him through your moans. He only hums in reply, preoccupied at the moment.
“I- god- I need your cock, please.” You're not sure if it was the phrase or the begging, but it makes Logan groan. You feel embarrassingly empty as he pulls his fingers out. You hear the sound of him stroking his hard cock with your slick, groaning and humming to himself before he picks you up. He leans over you, adjusting to you your hands and knees as you finally feel that thick, thick cock grinding against you. You gasp at the way it feels, feeling Logan smirk against your back.
“Having second thoughts?” The tone of his voice is teasing, but you know there's more than that behind the words. You vehemently shake your head, grinding back against him a little as you protest. Logan swears under his breath, holding onto your hips to keep them still as he sits up.
Both of you groan each time the head of his cock catches on your clit, Logan thrusting through your lips again and again as he lubes himself with the wetness you provide for him. You gasp when his head catches on your slot, notching just right.
Logan pushes into you so slowly, and you feel like he's thicker than you ever imagined he would be. You're impatient, desperate. You push back onto him in an attempt to take him in more, but his hands on your hips stop you.
“Believe me sweetheart, you don't want that yet.” Logan tells you, straining himself with how tight you feel around him. He soothingly rubs his thumbs against your skin, pressing into you until you have him completely, balls deep inside you.
“Please, please. Logan, Please, I need you to move.” Your begging starts to sound like nonsense to your own ears, but it makes Logan gasp all the same, his cock twitching from where it's buried inside of you. You practically cry in relief when he finally begins to thrust Inside of you.
His hip smack against your ass with every thrust, the sound of the slap mixed with the sounds of your love and the headboard hitting the wall a lewd and filthy symphony. Even better than your own moans were Logan's himself. Each and every groan and growl above you gave you a whole new array of things to imagine while fucking yourself- if you ever had to do so again.
You whine and whimper with every strong thrust, Logan slow and forceful with every movement. It felt like he wanted your insides to memorize exactly how his cock feels inside of you, and you doubt you'd ever mind it. He filled you perfectly, hitting every sweet spot inside of you.
Your arms are shaking. Struggling to hold yourself up with each and every rock of the bed. You barely start to buckle when He catches hold of you, an arm snacking under your chest and pulling you towards him. His hand spans your collarbone as he holds your back against his chest, holding you up as he continues to fuck you like no one before. You're closing in on that sweet release when his hips stutter a moment. His teeth dig into your shoulder with a sharp bite, holding you there close to him without breaking the skin.
“Are… are you -ah- close?” You ask. Logan only responds with a short and simple - “Fuck!” - before he pulls out of you.
You don't have time to whine about the emptiness before he's flipping you around, kissing you again as he pushes your back to the bed rather aggressively. He's quick to sling your legs over his arms, folding you in half as he sides fully into you in a single thrust. He's hitting you so much deeper in this position, chest pressed against your own as his thrusts continue to stutter.
Logan kisses you again, a bit differently than the last ones have been. These kisses are tender, sweet. A stark difference between his needy, frantic thrusts. There's a line of spit between you two as he pulls away, half-lidded eyes meeting your own. You’re closing in on your peak, and you can tell he is too. The pleasure is too much for you to handle at once, and you can't help but squeeze your eyes shut.
“Look at me.” Logan grabs a hold of your chin, your eyes flying open as he thumbs at your lip and holds your head still. “Don't look away.” His hips stutter some more, the both of you groaning as you clench around him, desperately trying to keep your eyes open as you finally cum around his cock. The fluttering of your walls are more than enough to send Logan over the edge, his cum warming your insides in thick spurts. Logan buries his face into your neck, groaning as you ride out both of your orgasms.
The two of you lay there for a moment, trying to catch your breath. Logan lets go of your sore legs, massaging your thighs as he presses sweet, comforting kisses to your cheek and temple. His hands wander up and down your sides, doing his best to soothe your aches without you even having to ask. -not that he would ever admit to having a soft side. Who would believe you if you told them that The Wolverine was a cuddler after sex anyway?
“Why didn't you just tell me?” You ask after a long moment. Logan hums, his Face tucked into the crook of your neck.
“Tell you what?”
“That you were jealous.” Logan only snorts at that, playfully pinching your side.
“Jealous of what? Your cologne?” He returns. You slap him on the shoulder as he chuckles at you, unable to stop the playful smile on your face.
“You mean the cologne that you thought was a whole-ass guy?” Logan stops at that, instead choosing to cover your mouth with his palm as he tucks his head closer.
“You're a lot prettier when you're quiet. You know that?”
#Prepare yourselves this one is a biggin#x men#x men comics#x men headcannons#wolverine#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett smut#logan drabble#logan howlett#wolverine x men#wolverine smut#x men wolverine#wolverine x reader#smut#marvel smut#marvel fanfiction#marvel reader insert#x men reader#x men smut#marvel#deadpool and wolverine
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hi!! i was wondering if i could ask for some angst with all the guys ٩(◕‿◕。)۶
smthing like mc (gender neutral if possible!) going to a mission and not coming back and the guys' reactions to that ?
ty in advance (≧▽≦)
When You Don't Come Back From Your Mission- The Love And DeepSpace Men
parings in order: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader genre: angst no comfort a/n: hi anonnie! i hope this was okay and that you enjoy ! i'll post a part where mc/ reader comes back from the mission after a long time and maybe that would be a comfort part of this angst reaction (๑>•̀๑) i know a couple people from my inbox have requested me to write something about that and i'll get it out soon it's just sitting on my drafts but it'll be out so so soon ദ്ദി ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ ) sorry lovelies i just get distracted a lot any likes and reblogs are always appreciated! enjoy!
⋆。‧˚ʚ♡ɞ˚‧。⋆
Xavier:
You and Xavier weren’t assigned to this mission, which was a bummer given how often you two have been always paired for similar tasks. Your extensive training together, countless sparring sessions, and numerous times you two have spent together have created a deep bond and sense of confidence in each other’s skills. Although it was unusual to not be paired in a mission, you both trusted in your abilities and didn’t think much of it.
As he returned from picking up snacks at the convenience store, he walked into the Hunter’s Association office and was struck by the sense of panic that had been overtaken in the room. The frantic energy was evident as he overheard that your team has not given any responses or updates regarding your location. The news hit him like a jolt, nearly causing him to drop the snacks he was holding.
His gentle demeanor shifted to one of deep concern. The usual calmness in his eyes was replaced by a serious and troubled look. His universe felt like it had dimmed, knowing that the brightest star was missing from his grasp.
He demanded immediate access to the latest mission’s location, coordinates, or any relevant information. He insisted that he would take charge of the situation himself and offer no objects as they recognized the intensity in his voice.
He internally blamed himself for not coming sooner. Every path he takes as he travels to find you, only fuels the sense of urgency and concern to find your and ensure your safety.
Zayne:
Zayne has always trusted in your abilities and knew what you were capable of. Each mission, he knew you could handle it with ease and he had faith that you would come back. As always, before he left he would always remind you, “Stay safe and don’t do anything reckless. I don’t want to see you back in my office with another injury.”
Normally, your absences were brief and he would patiently wait for your return, eager to hear the absurd stories of your missions, but this time something felt different. Something he couldn’t quite place. The days dragged on longer than usual and the silence from you was unsettling.
He tried to distract himself with paperwork and tending to patience but his anxiety gnawed at him, thinking of what had happened to you. A mission shouldn’t take this long, especially for someone as skilled as you.
Every day he would send a text and sometimes they were random. Sometimes they were filled with encouragement or updates about small things in his life, in hopes to get a response from you. However, each message he sent was always left unanswered which fueled his growing concern. He began to doubt if you were ignoring him or if something far worse had happened.
Unable to contain his worry any longer, he drove to your house and knocked on your door unannounced. The minutes stretched into an agonizing wait and when there was no response. His heart that had been warmed by your presence has now gripped by icy fear.
Each day he has desperately waited for any responses and any updates from the Hunter’s Association about your well-being. The longer he had to wait, the more he was determined to join the battlefield himself in desperation to find you again.
Rafayel:
Ever since you departed on your mission, he would be counting the seconds, minutes, and days until your return. It’s something he would usually do when you leave for a mission. Time passed by slowly in your absence and he tried to distract himself by visiting the beach or working on new sketches, hoping to find a spark of inspiration for his next piece. Yet, inspiration was difficult when his greatest muse was missing for a few days
A few days. What began to be a few days stretched into a week and more. His concern grew as your silence and absence in his life persisted. Normally, you would have responded to any of his texts or calls even amid the chaos of your missions. But now, this mission was different. His phone never lit up from any notifications from you and your absence gnawed at him.
His distress was evident. His meticulously groomed appearance had unraveled. His hair was disheveled and his outfits mismatched. The studio that was usually a bright haven of creativity had become a reflection of his inner turmoil. The room was shrouded in shadows, and canvases were marred with erratic splashes of paint and frustrated strokes.
'Missing you comes in waves and tonight I am drowning.'
He was spiraling and grew relentless, digging up any lead and rumor of information about your mission. Whatever happened to you, someone was going to pay. He doesn’t care if the bounty on his head catches up to him. He’ll try to find you no matter what, even if it takes him another 800 years.
Sylus:
He knew you were a skilled Hunter so initially he dismissed your absence as just another routine mission. He assumed he would see you again soon in a couple of days and began making plans for the two of you to relax and enjoy when you returned.
However as days turned into a week without any responses to his text or voice messages, his calm demeanor began to crumble. Your status on DeepSpace hadn’t been updated since the last time you had talked and it never showed that you read his messages. His unease deepened when Mephisto reported that he had been unable to locate you.
The growing anxiety and frustrations were impossible for him to contain. He had tried to rush to the location of your mission only to find no trace of you there. His office became a battleground of his conflicted emotions. He cursed himself for being so careless about you.
Luke and Kieran could only witness the storm of anger and worry from a distance. They dared not to approach him during the moments of his intense agitation. They understand as they miss you as well but they could only wish they could do so much to help find you.
He figures he has to take matters into his own hands no matter the cost. Your little Hunter’s Association could only do so much but many do not understand how much power, influence, and resources Sylus has at his disposal. He doesn’t care if he has to get his hands dirty, he will have to do anything to find his little dove back in his arms again.
#xavier x reader#xavier x you#xavier x y/n#zayne x reader#zayne x you#zayne x y/n#rafayel x reader#rafayel x you#rafayel x y/n#sylus x reader#sylus x you#sylus x y/n#xavier love and deepspace#zayne love and deepspace#rafayel love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#xavier lads#zayne lads#rafayel lads#sylus lads#love and deepspace#love and deepspace x reader#love and deepspace fic#love and deepspace scenarios#lads x you#lads x reader
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boyfriend shaped | lee seokmin
pairing: lee seokmin x reader
warnings: none, fluff, reader is implied to be female ('sweet girl', 'sweetheart'), non!idol au, mentions of dokyeom being a kindergarten teacher, dokyeom is boyfriend shaped in his newest ig post and i'm crying because of it
Dinner with your boyfriend was something you looked forward to.
Every Friday—since your boyfriend spent most of his week dealing with kindergarters who threw up on their sleeping mats and couldn't spell dog without adding an extra 'o'—promised to take you out to a nice fancy resturant and spend time with you afterwards.
The two of you were at a traditional Korean resturant this time around, and you couldn't help but stare at your attractive boyfriend from across the table, eyes runnig along his muscles and tanned skin.
After a few seconds of looking down at his menu, he catches your eyes, smiling as his sharp nose scrunches up in the cutest way.
"What?" He questions, obviously teasing. Seokmin knows better than anyone that you find yourself staring at him more often than not, and he loves teasing you for it (even if he does the same thing to you).
"You're so handsome and I love you." Sighing, you pull him by his hand, making him lean over the wooden table as you press your lemonade-tainted lips to his. He sighs under you, lips stretching into a gentle smile as he pecks your lips a few more times before pulling away.
His face is red, and his dark brown eyes are darting around the seating area as he pushes his horn rimmed glasses further upon his nose bridge.
"You're something else, you know that? I have to order for me and you in a minute, and you're over here complimenting me out of the blue and kissing me. How am I supposed to function with you kissing the thoughts out of me?" Seokmin sounds annoyed, but the smile on his face and the lovestruck look in his dark brown eyes makes you giggle.
"You don't mind it though, do you?" Sipping on your lemonade yet again, Seokmin chuckles, shaking his head as he closes the menu.
"No, I don't, but as I'd tell my kids—be patient, and good things will come to you." Seokmin's voice dropped an octave lower when he said the second half of that sentence, and you gasped, swatting his hand as he giggles cutely.
"You're absolutely diabolical, Seokmin." He chuckles at your choice of words, but doesn't deny it, smiling at you once more before the waiter appears at the side of the table.
After he finishes taking your orders, he grabs your menu for you and hands it to the waiter, thanking him for you as he directs his attention back to you.
"So, how was your day, sweet girl?" Seokmin locks his eyes on you, listening intently as you tell him all about your day.
You leave nothing out, mentioning everything from how you were about 20 minutes late to work due to a traffic jam, and the mediocre lunch you had on your break. Seokmin sits there patiently and listens, interjecting funny comments or comforting words when he can, and he encorages you as you begin to talk about the possibility of you quitting your stressful job.
"You really mean that?" You ask in disbelief, his sweet and tactful words making your eyes tear up as he nods, smiling at you as he pushes his nose to yours.
"Of course I mean it. I'll support you in whatever you want to do. Wherever you go, I follow. Whatever you do, I do." Seokmin's voice is so sweet and calming you can't argue with him any longer, and you lean in to kiss him again, smiling as he hums happily under you.
Seokmin wasn't usually this desperate for kisses, but it kept seeming as if he was making ways for you to kiss him. You thought it was cute, the way he was trying to be so nonchalant about it.
"Why are you so kissy today?" You question, and Seokmin pauses, eyes sparkling as he frowns slightly. "Why, do you not like it?" He sounds hurt, and it breaks your heart a little, seeing his dark brown widen like a kicked puppy.
"No, no, Min. I love it. I adore it, if I'm being honest," You smile, and Seokmin cheers up quickly, eyes darting down to your lips as he sighs.
"I love you, sweetheart." Seokmin said the phrase almost ever hour of every day, but times like this—where the mood was sweet and mellow—the three-word expression made you suddenly even more grateful for Seokmin's sweet heart and kind disposition.
"And I love you, Min." Grabbing his hands, you kiss each of his fingertips, smiling as Seokmin giggles, huffling cutely as you chuckle at his reaction.
#kpop seventeen#writing#lyrwrites#seventeen#lee seokmin#svt fluff#svt x reader#svt#svt dk#dk seventeen#dk x reader#dk svt#dokyeom#userhyperdramas#ilovehim#seokmin x reader#svt seokmin#lyrscorner🪄
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for you i would. | han dongmin.
synopsis ୨ৎ han dongmin – your best friend, your closest friend of years – pays a late-night visit at your place. it wasn't rare for him to randomly come over, to do small little actions without you noticing, to get close to you and press soft kisses on your forehead. well, not rare for you, at least.
pairing: bestfriend!han dongmin x gn!reader | fluff! (includes skinship, kisses, but nothing explicit...) | wc: 1.6k ⊹ ࣪ ˖
a/n: first post, kind of nervous hehe.. absolutely not proofread...
--- ♡ ---
8:30 P.M.
as the snow had been falling, the days felt longer, more lonely than usual. it was cold as you spent the days under the blanket, seeking for warmth, but it was just never enough. the sky had darkened, the snowflakes and stars blurring together, it was quiet.
a familiar rhythm plays on your front door. five knocks, you know just who it is. lazily getting out from the covers on the couch, you walk to the door, opening to face the one and only, han dongmin. his face is buried in his red knit scarf over a black puffer, but you can tell by his eyes, just barely covered by his messy hair, that it is him.
"let me in, it's freezing out here," he says with a soft, warm chuckle. stepping aside, you let him in, shutting the door behind you, and walking back to the couch under the blanket. as he removes his shoes, he glances up watching you walk back, a soft smile hidden under his scarf. after removing his scarf and coat, he joins you on the couch, plopping down by your side.
"it's late," you say softly, matter-of-factly. all he can do is huff softly at that, his eyes crinkling the tightest bit. "did you not want me over," he replies, almost teasingly, as if he knew you had been feeling lonely due to the weather. "i missed you. you cold?" he doesn't let you answer before he shuffles closer to you, pulling you into his embrace with his arm tightly around your shoulder, and chin on top of your head. you snuggle closer to him, arms finding a way around his body as the side of your face presses into his shoulder. he shifts slightly just to make you more comfortable against him, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. he's warm despite being outside in the snow just a few minutes ago. dongmin was always warm compared to you, and he always offered to share his warmth.
"you have a fireplace, why not make use of it." dongmin gets up, pulling you to the direction of the fireplace. you groan softly at the loss of contact and warmth, but as he turns on the fireplace, he pulls you down to sit between his legs on the carpet. "always so cold," he says while rubbing his hands on the side of your arms. "you need to take care of yourself, alright? if you won't, i'll scold you."
"you worry too much, min," you say in almost a hushed whisper, leaning your back onto his chest. his arms snake around your waist as if he were pulling you closer, "i care for you."
"i never said you didn't," obviously said with a smile. he chuckles lightly before nuzzling his face into your neck, pressing soft kisses there down to your shoulder, causing you to shiver slightly and tilt your head in response for more access. it was a common action shared between you and dongmin. it felt normal, well, it was normal. he continues to press kisses, alternating from soft to firm, as his arms hold you tighter against him. he's enjoying having his arms around you, kissing you softly, having you all to himself, just as you are enjoying the feel of his body and warmth on yours. dongmin always made you feel this way. warm. even without the fireplace, or the blanket, he had this warmth to him.
"dongmin?" you softly whisper his name, getting his attention as he pauses before pressing one last kiss on your shoulder. "hm," he hums in reply, looking over as he rests his chin on your shoulder. "what is it, y/n?" his voice is soft, as usual when he speaks to you.
you sigh softly in content, pressing yourself back just the tiniest bit more into him, looking at him as you press the side of your head on his forehead. "i really needed you..."
"hm?" as if he didn't understand, he replies, "what do you mean?" you don't know what you mean, or why you said it in the first place. it kind of just came out. in a hushed tone, you speak, "i don't know.... it's just like you always know when i need you..."
dongmin doesn't quite understand, but he holds you tighter, "well, i am your savior aren't i?" he laughs softly, his breath softly on the side of your neck. "mmm, you are." you hum. your hands find a way on his, rubbing your thumb against the back of his hand. "how do you always know when to come?"
"because i could read your mind." he says this playfully, but his tone softens as he sighs. "but i always come when i need you."
there it is again. that feeling of warmth, this time, in your heart. it's quiet for some time. the silence comfortable, yet filled with this undiscovered emotion between you two.
"why do you do this?" the question slips out, not in a harsh manner, but a gentle tone that voices out the slight vulnerability. "do what?" dongmin replies. "this. this thing that you do," shifting ever so slightly to face him more. "why do you things you would never do?"
the question catches dongmin off guard; you can see it in his slight eyebrow raise and pursing of lips. he's not sure if he should take offense or explain himself. "i care about you," is all he replies with. a short and simple response that doesn't quite satisfy you, but at least it was an answer. he can see the slight disappointment in your eyes at his vague answer, sighing before he clears his throat. "you know i'd do anything for you, right?"
there's a small pause before he continues, his voice even softer than before. "i don't do these things because i don't really like to," he shifts you to face him more while still sitting between his legs. he makes eye contact, locking eyes with yours, and never leaving them. it's almost overwhelming with how soft his eyes are, the fireplace reflecting in his eyes, as if they were the reason they were so warm. he speaks again in a hushed whisper as his hands find yours, intertwining your fingers together, "but for you i would."
your breath starts to pick up in the slightest way, the intimacy of the moment becoming slightly overwhelming. neither you or dongmin remove your eyes from each other. one hand releases yours and moves up to your neck, tilting your head up. he leans his head forward, resting his forehead on yours, noses brushing against each other. "i would do so many things for you. so many things, y/n." his gaze finally flickers away from your eyes down to your lips, "anything," as he looks back into your eyes. the moment is charged of unspoken feelings, both dongmin's breathing, as well as your own, becoming more heavy and falling into rhythm as your chest heaves. your heart is pumping, you can feel it. you're sure he could hear it too, unless that's his heart beating just as loudly, in the same pace as yours.
dongmin leans closer, tilting your head further back as he gently presses his lips on yours. the kiss is soft, sweet, and warm. just like dongmin. slow and steady, his lips move against yours, not once rushing things to not ruin the moment. he pulls away with his forehead resting on yours again, his breath slightly ragged, looking deep into your eyes as if he were searching for your reaction. your breath coming out in soft gasps, your eyes look up at his, wide and purely.
the two of you stay studying each other's gaze. finally breaking the silence, dongmin, in his usual warm tone, says the words, "i love you," his breath hitting your lips.
as if time had stopped, you finally register his words. you can't get the own words to fall out of your mouth as the moment still comes as a shock. you lean up slightly, pressing your lips on his softly for a couple seconds, just to feel them on yours again. "dongmin... i..." looking up, you can see the hesitance in his eyes, waiting for your response. "i love you... i... i love you a lot..."
dongmin's round, dark brown eyes warm up again, a small smile forming on his lips. he tries to remain cool and collected by quickly looking down, but as he looks back up at you, he can't help but feel his heart flutter and let out a soft huff of a chuckle. "oh thank goodness...." he says in breathy relief. he looks at you softly, his smile uncontrollably starting to quirk up again, "someone loves meeee," teasingly.
you can't help but laugh at his tactics, somehow always finding a way to change the mood of things within a second. "you really couldn't keep the moment going?" you whine slightly in faux annoyance, but the smile on your lips fails your attempt. dongmin clears his throat, "for you i would," attempting to keep a straight face, but he can't keep the small smile from forming on his face. he buries his into your neck, pulling you down onto him as he lays back against the carpet. "mine," he says slightly possessively into your neck, "do i have the honor?"
well, what else can you say? you nod as you laugh softly in his embrace, laying over him. "call me what you want, as long as i feel your warmth," with an obvious smile plastered on your face, knowing only for you, would he share his warmth.
--- ♡ ---
thank u for reading. please do not copy!
© chaerrisin, 2024.
#boynextdoor#bnd#bonedo#boynextdoor taesan#bnd taesan#han taesan#taesan#han dongmin#boynextdoor taesan fluff#boynextdoor x reader#bnd x reader#boynextdoor scenarios#bnd scenarios#boynextdoor fluff#bnd fluff#boynextdoor imagines#bnd imagines#first post#chaerrisin
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Too Far.
Summary: He's like a wounded animal when he's angry, lashing out when he feels cornered. He's gone too far this time, snapped and said something he definitely didn't mean, so now he has to fix it.
Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader (No use of Y/N)
TW: Fighting. Daryl is a dick, but not really, but also he is. Apologetic!Daryl. Alexandria Era. Sex.
A/N: Inspired by an excellent post by @love-norman which I'll link in the comments. I wasn't sure if you were okay with smut, so there's a fairly brief mention of sex but nothing overly explicit.
-
He’s a surprisingly effective communicator, once she can convince him to talk more and with enough time to work out exactly what ticks and grunts mean what. Daryl Dixon’s entire bag is self-sacrifice, so if he can assume that she needs him to tell her what’s going on in the always too busy head of his, he can do that for her without much care for how it impacts him. It’s not his most healthy coping mechanism but it certainly isn’t his worst and the reward? Oh, the reward is sweet. The reward is comfort and kindness and being held; being loved. What’s a moment of discomfort for a lifetime of her?
He's had to practice letting his walls down, slowly but surely since he met her, all the while failing to realise she was just digging her way underneath them. She didn’t ever pry, not really, not in any way that felt invasive, but she’d patiently wait him out; ask the question quietly, softly, and let him linger in the comfortable silence until he chose to answer back. Sometimes she’d work out the information without his need to speak at all; it happened the moment he realised he was fucked, that he was absolutely, irrefutably hers. She’d worked out exactly who he was as a person and he’d barely sad a word.
He’s attentive, and whilst that shocks him it comes as no surprise to anyone around him. He has spent his life fearing that he is exactly who he feared, but those who are lucky enough to consider themselves, correctly or not, close to Daryl never fear for much but his wellbeing. That he is a careful, thoughtful and tender partner surprises nobody but him. That’s not to say they don’t argue, the end of the world comes with its own set of tensions even without the usual relationship concerns, but he’s learnt not to bite first.
-
He shouldn’t have drunk anything, in hindsight, they’re both in bad shape, overwrought and under-fed and they shouldn’t have been at a fucking party, of all places. He definitely shouldn’t have had the four glasses of scotch Reg offered him on a mostly empty stomach. He can’t get used to the Alexandria walls, the houses he never could have afforded to breathe near let alone buy, the soft comforts he’d never had even before the end of the world. He’s never been to a party that hasn’t had a piss-stained couch or an overly full ashtray.
“You know that’s bullshit, Daryl, you’re being ridiculous!” She yells, firmly back in their own living room after he’d practically stormed out of Deanna’s. One minute they’re in full swing, standing talking about vacations from the old days with some new faces, the next his hand is dropping from around her waist and thudding from the front door like she’d said, ‘fuck off’ rather than the word ‘Canada’. He’d slammed the door behind them and snarled about how he would have embarrassed her and her fancy fucking vacations in ‘the real world’.
“Lil’ miss travel abroad and see th’ world cause she’s better than Daryl fuckin’ Dixon”
“What? That’s not-“
“I’m jus’ an idiot redneck with nothin’ an’ you’re this smart chick who saw the world, I get it, I ain’t dumb, th’ fuck would ya have wanted wit’ me?”
Her heart would shatter for him if she wasn’t seething quite so much, the sheer desperation in his words at odds with the tension in his body, clenched hands dragging through his finally clean hair. His eyes are stinging and he absolutely refuses to cry, has never gotten over thinking it makes him weak even when he feels weak.
“Daryl, what the fuck? Why are you being such an asshole?“
“Shut up, always yappin’ about stupid shit, fuckin’ hate ya sometimes!”
He turns quickly, wants to throw something, wants to scream, broad shoulders and harsh angles and all the wind leaves his body when he sees her flinch away from him. She’s cowers backwards, he feels like he’s going to be sick, body collapsing in on itself as he feels the anger leave his bones, replaced with ice laced panic. For a second, a horrifying second that feels ten times as long, he’s his old man. Shitfaced and angry with a glass in hand and if he had a mirror, he knows exactly whose face he’d see staring back at him.
“I would never hurt ya” he whispers, voice low and so broken, full of conviction as his breath hitches in the middle and crumbles at the end and she’d hug him if she wasn’t so shell shocked. Neither of them move for a beat, standing stock still as he trails his eyes over her, clocks the way her gaze refuses to lift to meet his. He can’t breathe. The room is too small for everything he’s feeling, like the walls are inching close and closer and the air is getting less. He tries to move like lightning but his whole body feels sluggish and slow as he inches past her and out the front door, flinching as it closes behind him and he wanders out into the street. He stares back at the house for a moment before deciding he needs a walk to clear his head.
When he comes back she’s sitting on the couch waiting for him, thumbs twiddling, head still down and worry eating her alive. He eases the door shut behind him, loud enough to tell her he’s home but soft enough to show he’s not mad. He wishes a door could convey remorse but it’s taken him long enough to be able to do it with words he doubts a block of wood would be able to in the timeframe he needs. He shucks off his boots, realising he shouldn’t have been wearing them in the house in the first place.
The fresh air has cooled his body enough that he feels less of the alcohol circulating around his system. He tries not to squeeze the flowers he’d plucked from the bush outside Aaron’s place as he stands with his back against the wood.
“’M sorry” he whispers before clearing his throat and repeating it at a higher volume. She turns her face towards him, looking at him over her shoulder. The anger is gone from her face, replaced with a dwelling worry that spikes at him, makes him replay his words over and over.
“What did I do?”
“Nothin’” he insists quickly, pauses before he realises he should say more, that she sometimes needs him to say more, they’ve talked about this “Ya didn’t, I promise”
“I’m sorry”
That does it, rips him from his safe haven by the door because he can’t stand the thought that she deserved anything he said to her, that she’d said anything wrong when he knows she hadn’t. Talking at a party, about stupid old-world stuff whilst her spare, wine glass free hand kept his back warm. She hadn’t said a damn thing wrong, and he’d scared her.
He strides over to the couch, coming round to kneel in front of her. He places the somewhat squashed flowers on the couch cushion next to her. He hovers a hand above her knee, placing it gently on the fabric of her dress when she doesn’t flinch away at the sight. He doesn’t want her to flinch ever again.
“Dun’ apologise to me when ya ain’t done nothin’ wrong”
“I’m so-“
“Dun’ ever apologise to me when i’s my fault. ‘S my shit an’ I shouldn’t take it out on ya”
She knows he loves her, has proven it time and time again, has put his body in front of hers in the face of almost certain death, would protect her with his last breath, would love her with it. But she knows she’ll never be able to unhear it, that some things you can’t take back, that she’ll always wonder, just a little bit if its true. Logic and love are very rarely intertwined.
“Okay”
He can still hear his fathers words ringing in his head, he knows, more than most, the power that words hold over people. He tries not to say anything he doesn’t mean, and he’ll admit he’s acerbic, pointed sure but never cruel, never unnecessarily unkind. He doesn’t know why tonight was different, but he takes her hands in his, locking his eyes on her so she understands.
“I dun’ get t’ speak t’ ya like that”
“No, you don’t” she agrees, voice firmer, back to her usual tone, the one he’s always loved going hand in hand with the certainty she can hold her own. She pauses, bringing his hands up to press a kiss to his knuckles, soothing because she’s terrified that after all this time, he’s still going to break them by thinking he’s not allowed to claim his hurt “You alright?”
He doesn’t answer, instead sitting back on his feet, raising a small hopeful smile at her.
“Tell me about th’ vacation”
“I don’t-“
“Please. Ya said ya still think ‘bout Canada all th’ time”
He really does want to know, he hadn’t been outside of Georgia before everything went down, and she’s mentioned travel but Canada hadn’t come up; he’s not sure if it was that, that set him off or that he felt inadequate in a room full of people with experiences he never got to have.
“I think it was my favourite trip. Packed a bag and went alone on a whim, found a lake in the forest with a little cabin. Just mountains and trees and lakes. It’s the most peaceful I’ve ever felt. I never wanted to mention it, I know you missed out on so much, but then everyone was talking and I-“
“Nah, go on, ‘S’alright”
“When Reg asked…I was going to say that’s what I picture, when I think of life outside of all of this, me and you in Canada”
“Ya think of that with me?” his voice is low, incredulous awe pulled tight at the edges, he was so busy feeling less than everyone else that he’d missed out on the fact she was thinking of him. She nods, smiling at him, working it out without him needing to say it, figuring out what drove him to snap without asking, under his walls and right in the centre of the internal world he’s built.
“We’d have a house, out near a lake with a wooden porch, and a dog, big scruffy one who likes to catch fish. We’d have coffee together overlooking the water in the morning. You’d work at the local garage, ‘cause you’re good with your hands and tools, wouldn’t have to deal with people all day, fix up all the bikes you’d secretly want...”
He’s staring her at in silence, watching her wistful face glow in the lamplight, he can barely breathe let alone find words knowing that she’s not just dreamt about a life with him, she’s thought it out in detail. He wants it, wants that life with her so badly it aches, thinks it’s the first time he’s wanted anything from life except to get through it.
“I’d work at the bar, play guitar at crappy open mic nights and you’d come for a beer after my shift to walk me home”
He hums, all the response he can manage, guilt chewing at him from the inside, clawing at his mind knowing that he’s taken his own problems out on her, told her he hates her all the while she’s dreaming of something so utterly fucking perfect.
“We’d make dinner together and dance in the living room, go camping at the weekends and make love all night long”
“In another life?” he chuckles, warm and full, knowing he’ll dream about this for the rest of his life.
“In every life…If you’d find me”
“I’d find ya”
-
He runs her a bubble bath, still amazed and confused that he can, that they’ve spent months on the road starving and struggling and here there’s a pantry that has bubble bath. The flowers from Aarons front garden are perched in a glass of water by the bed, the lamps turned off and the doors are locked up as tight as they can be. He’s insistent that he shows his apology, but he’s never had a way to do it outside these walls, nothing beyond words and affection and his experience with what women might like is limited at best.
He stands in the doorway, watching as she wraps herself in a dressing gown. He wonders idly if the amount of love he feels for her could kill him; he feels it so deeply in his bones that he physically isn’t sure it should be able to fit inside of one person. He feels it explode warmth around his body when she shuffles forward to rest her head on his chest.
“You know you don’t have to do all of this? I’m not mad”
Later, when he’s apologised again, reassured her and comforted her and she’s convinced him he’s worth loving in return, he takes them both to bed. Touches her with soft, repentant hands that have always been gentle, hands that are gentle exactly because he knows how dangerous they can be. Atonement seeping from every inch of him as he inches home inside of her, cherishes the contended sigh she lets out at the feel of him. He could never hate her, not even if he tried.
He stills when he bottoms out, rests his forehead against hers as her hips press against his firmly, dragging him as deep as he can go.
“Wha’ ya see in me, anyway?” he whispers against her lips, full of self-doubt.
She looks into him with an intensity that almost hurts, brings her hands to the sides of his face, makes sure he believes her as sincerely as she believes his apology.
“Everything”
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" Welcome back to Night Raven College's 'Ghostly Gossip'! The school's unofficial main online source for the latest news, articles and trending topics circulating around campus! "
" I'd usually describe this as a super exclusive entry, but who am I kidding? If you've spent more than five minutes in this school, you've already seen his shadows lurking around in the background at some point (I mean, he's like. super tall.) "
Navigation:
R. Rosehearts ▪︎ T. Clover ▪︎ C. Diamond ▪︎ A. Trappola ▪︎ D. Spade ▪︎ L. Kingscholar ▪︎ R. Bucchi ▪︎ J. Howl ▪︎ A. Ashengrotto ▪︎ J. Leech ▪︎ F. Leech ▪︎ K. Al Asim ▪︎ J. Viper ▪︎ V. Schoenheit ▪︎ R. Hunt ▪︎ E. Felmier ▪︎ I. Shroud ▪︎ O. Shroud ▪︎ M. Draconia ▪︎ L. Vanrouge ▪︎ S. Zigvolt ▪︎ Silver
Design notes:
Man I've been postponing this for so long, I don't even remember half of what my process with this one was like. But I concluded that if I don't post this now, the loss of my mental notes will only get worse with time, so here you go, putting this out there once and for all lol
For a general picture I wanted Malleus' vibes to be more fairy tale-like. (He ended up reminding me a bit of Faybelle too, in a way.) The colors of those iridescent black feathers go well with him, I think. And did someone mention Howl's moving castle? Yeah, Howl's monster form.
I got this one ask before, reccomending the Cockatrice monster for Malleus, and searching a bit about it, is apparently also often taken as a synonymous with the basilisk? So like, Wyvern meets Basilisk, but it is also giving fae, idk. Listen, the idea inside my head is like, if you're asked to imagine a mythical creature that roams around a dark forest, outside the castle of a cursed princess, it's him. He's the creature.
And I'll admit I have not been catching up with the Diasomnia's chapter :( so give me 50 years at least so I can make up some more in-depth lore for his MH au counterpart (or maybe I'll just read a resume out of the wiki). Malleus enjoyers are free to drop headcanons onto him, you guys' knowledge of his character are always so astronomical it never fails to impress me /gen
#.the ghostly gossip#my art#twst#twisted wonderland#twst fanart#malleus draconia#twst au#diasomnia#btw my clip studio trial has ended so I'm back on ibis paint for the text editing on the character intros so#if the font looks different that's why 👍
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