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#i sometimes forget how young he is bc what do you mean its the last year of his ELC
tiger-balm · 4 months
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seth jarvis exit interview 23-24 season
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stunie · 1 month
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Darling I've noticed that you're open for matchups. You have been taking requests a lot as far as I can track and I hope you took your time on them. 🥲🥲
I come here to participate, if you're still open? Please if it's necessary, you may ignore this request of mine. Your thoughts on things matters to me. <33
You wrote one of my favorites... KN8, Haikyū!! and Windbreaker. And you did all the characters very well. Chef kiss. Plus Hoshina— dear Hoshina. I've been thinking of him all day and it is getting unhealthy. HELP if you don't mind getting me a Windbreaker boy? Men? Yes?
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Things about me: I'm a she/her! Hitting 18 is a change for me and weww. The level of stress has increased and coffee is my water now. But I'm still young so i'm trying to find some ways to unstress myself, sighs? I'm an INTJ (and I got a mixed feeling of this MBTI bc sometimes, I do not know myself. 😓😓) and sleepy 24/7. I'm comfortable at sleeping anywhere as long as I can close my eyes still. I'm patient, tend to be seen as relaxed and aloof but can be unhinged whenever I am left alone with my thoughts or with my friends. Pretty mean but I tend to be considerate. Too considerate that even meeting people and no matter how open that person is, I get formal. I love and hate to stay late, and love and hate studying, and love and hate everything (moody at some times).
I went to a program last Wednesday and took an Intelligence Test Survey. I got 100% of Existential Intelligence and 20% of Interpersonal... And hope this helps through your analysis of my personality?
I love to draw too! Sing, read, watch anime and listen to music. Especially listening to classical music and dancing around the room alone is the type of tea. As much as I wanted to engage myself in physical activities, my stamina is same as Kenma (my spirit animal, i'm afraid). I have some struggles with sharing my thoughts out loud and would take me time to share it. I'm a stuttering mess if I failed to express my thoughts.
Learning history give me some kind of hype despite the fact I tend to forget things,, but I really love to know what's been happening from the past (and it made me believed that I have a past life where i'm living in Victorian era... Delusional me). Other topics I love to learn is Art, Science, Philosophy and Psychology. 💪🏻
I never dated someone's before so I appreciate things deeply of what that s/o shows. Even if its quiet or loud kind of love.
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That's all and I wonder what are your thoughts? Hope this isn't too much. Thank you for reading all the way here!! 🥲🥲 Have a good day dear and take your time. ^^
HI HI nonnie !! bahahaha we’ve done a lot huh !!! it was so fun (: you’re so kind for checking on me! thank you for that (& for joining in!!) 🥺 i appreciate it very much 🫂🤍 for yours, im thinking ….!!!!
SUGISHITA! :O i think the dynamic here would be the cutest thing ever. look at sugishita on the right pic … and you said ur sometimes seen as relaxed and aloof ?!! thinking about you two sitting together nahahahah and nirei is like “i wonder what those two are thinking about.” ITS CUTE. also he’s joining you in every activity. or if not, he’s supporting you in every activity. listens to your classical music. perks up at your drawings and he looks really excited when you show him…STUTTERING MESS YOU SAY? it’s okay! he’s patient. he’ll understand. also thinks it’s cute ….
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shwarmii · 1 year
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also last post i said my body was "likely-POTS-raddled" and like. that is very true BUT ALSO I WANNA VENT A LIL REAL QUICK
i get why i probably have undiagnosed POTS
i can't be outside in the sun/anywhere warm or hot for long without feeling nauseous and sick. meaning i might as well be agoraphobic with how little i go outside since i live in Southern California where our seasons are "hot" and "hotter" with a day or two of rain dispersed randomly. despite feeling like this, i only sweat sometimes, AND no matter what i do my circulation is so poor that i feel icy to the touch even though i feel like i am boiling. as a result, i have the a/c on always (to the point my mama has said i "live in a meat locker" lmao rip), tend to do errands late afternoon or evening, and prefer hanging out with friends into the night. a very frequent symptom of POTS is the body have an inability to regulate its internal temperature, resulting in heat making a lot of POTS patients feel nauseous. poor circulation is also common in POTS patients
while packing, i fainted about four times even though i was eating well-enough and whatnot, simply because i was bending up and down so often due (1) to these boxes i had to fill up and move about and, (2) instead of the usual "i sit for hours" stuff i do (due to chronic leg pain making walking/standing painful), i was taking breaks by sitting for a bit and then getting up. like i started to actually feel dizzy getting up/down even when i wasnt fainting (yet), like i could FEEL it almost happen. and when it would happen, it wasnt "oh, light black dots surrounding my vision with somewhat jelly-legs because i stood up too fast" that id get once in a while for my whole life (i forget if thats bc of low blood-sugat or low blood-pressure but still) but it was proper FULL BLACKNESS and my knees buckling all because i slowly stood up and took a step forward. i had to grab onto things to keep from hitting my head on the floor and got very lucky i didnt lose consciousness >> be unable to grab something and protect my head, bc i was risking getting a concussion from how i was Not Falling Safely (i never learned to fall safely, unfortunately). though a majority of POTS patients dont faint, it is a key-note symptom of the condition and usually happens when the person is going from sitting to standing and whatnot as their body disregulates and overracts to the movement
my medical practioners have gone "huh" and taken my heart-rate twice or three times bc it was "way too high". like. sometimes its been "a normal level of high, lots of people get a faster heart-rate bc going to the doctor makes them nervous" and thats my "normal" with them. but lately theyve been going "...okay let's do that again bc all youve done is walk over and sit down, i get youre severley anxious/have PTSD/have medical trauma but c'mon". apparently, it's common for POTS patients' heart-rate to disregulate and treat standing and walking over somewhere as rigorous exercise, which could explain my "way too high heart-rate"
and other symptoms (my chronic migraines, shakiness, chronic fatigue, brain fog, chronic memory loss, and so many more) and even masked-symptoms (i used to have a lot of shortness of breath so then i got REALLY GOOD at breath control very young to mitigate the issue, like to the point that singers in my life have complimented me on it and said its impressive (i cant sing well tho alas, its in my bucket list to take classes and develop the skill). but i still have trouble breathing after exertion of any kind, but i always have this memory of one P.E. teacher in my head forcing me to take a step back to regulate my breathing back, bc he once told us "Don't you ever stop breathing or hold it in or do shallow breaths when doing somrthing hard. Shit could kill you. Do you know how many old people die on the toliet because they held their breath as they tried to take a shit? Do you want that to be how you die? Your pants down, failing to take a shit? Breathe. Long and deep. Force it to happen. Don't you ever hold it in." lmao thanks, teach)
like
i gET IT. POTS IS LIKELY ONE OF MY (MANY) CONDITIONS
but also im not allowed to have POTS
because the only reason i already knew what POTS was when my friends started going "Hey. Hey, maybe you should look into POTS? Like, maybe ask your doctor about it?" (which she said i couldn't have it bc i dont faint (which i found out is untrue) and we have since discovered ACTUALLY I DO FAINT, i just dont bend up/down often and i also tend to stay seated for hours on end once i do sit) is because of tiktok. like. my fyp put me on POTS Tiktok and i stayed there for a few weeks bc a lot of POTS Tiktok is usually these women showing how their partner cares for them, that love and romance is possible while disabled, that their POTS didnt ruin their date but just meant the pair of them had to sit down on the floor for a while while their boyfriend helped raise their feet. very cute shit, it helped like a soothing balm on my internalized ableism ass' "nobody could ever wanna date me bc im sickly" heart. but yeah. so i was in that hub for several weeks and learned a lot of things about it via osmosis. but so many of these videos featured women fainting so i was like "lol not me" bc i hadnt started packing to move >> bent up/down a lot >> fainted several times yet. but yeah no i (jokingly) refuse to have POTS tho because then that shit means TIKTOK DIAGNOSED ME FIRST. ILLEGAL. NOT ALLOWED TO HAPPEN. NO. UNCONSTITUTIONAL BEHAVIOR. THAT ALGORITHM IS NOT ALLOWED TO HAVE DIAGNOSED ME FIRST, FUCK NO LMAO
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bitchlessdino · 2 years
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Hi, can I have a request? 😇
You now how Mingyu in the last GoSe episode talked about how him and Soonyoung aren't good match (like personality)?
I was wondering about how would it be being in poly relationship with these two. 🤔
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Pairing: soonyoung x afab!reader x mingyu
Genre: fluff, slice of life, smut
Word count: 800ish
tags: a lot background, domesticity, smut eventually, bisexual polycule, oral (giving and receiving), pet names, whiny gyu, teasing soonyoung, bossy soonyoung, pussy slapping
author note: I was stuck on how to approach this bc i was wracking my brain on whether I should try a new method like bullet pointing the details or write full thing, so how I decided to structure this a combination of how I've been answering requests lately and how i normally write fic. hopefully, this all makes sense. Enjoy!
Hoshi and Mingyu couldn’t be any more different from each other. Dating both of them is like owning both a dog and a cat. The dog is Mingyu who is loyal, loving, and overbearingly sweet, however, his breed would be Saint Bernard with how big and clumsy he is. With his size, his strength causes him to drop things left and right, causing nonfunctioning household appliances, and occasionally a frustrating Soonyoung that falls victim to his boyfriend's obstructive mistakes.
That did not make Soonyoung perfect either. If Mingyu was a dog, Soonyoung is the most hyperactive cat you have ever met. He's the type to really push and pull when he wants, meaning some days or hours of the day all he wants is affection, other times he's very self-involved and absorbed in his own interests. Those days when he's distracted, he's forgetting things like Mingyu making dinner at home when he decides brings home takeout.
You admit fights happen sometimes. It's inevitable with these two. Some days topics would vary from the type of movie playing for movie nights (Soonyoung loves his romantic comedies, while Mingyu was always interested in something jam-packed and exciting), to the contrast in cleanliness between the two (Soonyoung doesn’t even know where the vacuum is stored in the apartment).
Luckily, serious fights were rare and easy to make up since you play such a neutral role. You often found yourself to be one of the mediators in those situations and were thought to be a voice of reason. No matter how big the conflict got, no matter the length, the volume, or the reason, there was always a resolution. So as fun as a poly relationship may be, it's not a perfect science and that's fine. It was exciting because it was unconventional, yet at the same time, as loving as another monogamous relationship.
The sex, however, that you can't get from a relationship that wasn’t polygamy.
“Holy shit, baby, you’re so wet.”
Your excitement drips from Soonyoung’s finger like nectar, oozing more when you see him catch their sheen from his fingers into his mouth. You audibly moan at the scene, vibrating around the cock wedged in your mouth, causing its owner to jolt in place. With his knees bent in the pillows and gripping the bed frame for balance, Mingyu lets out a weak gasp, grabs you by the head, and shoves his cock far in your mouth just to get you to shut up. “‘Young, do not do that. I almost busted in her mouth.”
Soonyoung scoffs, “You talking to me again? What happened to being mad at me?”
The shorter man flicks a slick finger up your slit, hearing your whimpers ensue, causing Mingyu’s cock to twitch again in your mouth. The taller man gnash at his bottom lip to hold back his moan, glaring at his boyfriend who was smiling like the devil. “F-fuck you.”
“He doesn’t mean that, kitten,” Soonyoung averts his attention to you, eyes batting at you with feigned innocence, “He just can’t think with your pretty mouth around his cock.”
Soonyoung pushes two digits deep inside your prep cunt, your whines like music, and he feels your hips buck up in his direction, hungry for Soonyoung to move already. He thoughtfully moves inside you, twisting them, and plays with you gently. Drool seeps out of your mouth. Your legs slightly flail, clenching around his fingers while simultaneously trying to play the part for Mingyu. The man with his hands in your hair holds you with great care. He pulls the hair away from your face, seeing your eyes watch him with sincere eyes, bobbing down on him like you have a million times (which maybe you did).
“I really can’t,” Mingyu grunts, he caresses the side of your cheek, holding its warmth,“Soonyoung make her cum already.”
Sooyoung slows down on purpose, agonizing his partner’s poor pussy. You whine relentlessly, and Mingyu follows, feeling himself about to fill your mouth to the brim with his scorching cum. The blonde looks at them both. “Tell me how much you want it, Pup. I want to know how much you want Kitten to cry around your cock.”
“The fuck?” Mingyu retorts.
Soonyoung lands a tight slap to the eager cut, noticing you clench around to nothing, as you again vibrate around Mingyu’s cock, the poor man moaning loud enough to echo the room. “You piec–Come on, baby. Cry around my cock, hmm?”
“Not enough. Tell them you want to see their pretty face fucked out while we fill both their holes.”
“Mmh, baby doll. Love. I want to see you be good for ‘Young and me. Be a pretty toy for us while we fuck your cunt and mouth nice and good, Okay? Can you do that for me? For us?”
You nod at the taller man, earning a pat on the head. Mingyu smiles down at you sweetly, lightly grasping your chin, happy to have this brief moment to yourselves until Soonyoung once again interrupts. The older man pulls himself up to drag the articles of clothing off his lower body, the angry throbbing cock catching your eye in an instant, internally begging for that to be inside you.
“We can’t keep our puppy waiting now, can we kitten?”
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mythiccheroacademia · 4 years
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—lunch box
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A/N: just another cute idea i had because i’m obsessed with barbarian/dragon king!bakugo and fantasy shit in general. some context: you and bakugo are betrothed—although, sometimes you wish you weren’t bc he can be a real asshole. luckily for you, he’s willing to work on it bc he likes loves you just that much. a litte angst (it wouldn’t be a mtha story without it) but it ends in fluff <3
Warnings: cursing
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Your friends looked at their food with heart eyes and dug into the neatly wrapped box with fever.
“Ahh! Thank you for making this, Y/N!” one of them exclaimed. The other could only nod in agreement, too into your cooking to speak.
You smiled and waved them off. “It was nothing. Consider it a thank you for letting me copy the homework last night,” you chuckled.
“Did you cook one for Prince Bakugo? I’d imagine he’d love it! If there’s anyone’s cooking he loves more than his own, it’s yours!”
At the mention of his name, your expression fell. You looked down at the case of food you had prepared for him as an apology.
Four days ago, you two were hanging around his residence. You managed to get him to dance around with you. Well, it more like you were dancing and he was doing his best not to combust in embarrassment. Katsuki warned you that you shouldn’t be too reckless otherwise you’d break something.
Of course, you paid him no mind, too enthralled with your fun to notice your proximity to a nearby statue—one of the Bakugo family’s treasures.
One thing led to another, and you knocked it over, shattering it before either of you could even react. Your rich skin lost its glow and your boyfriend cursed something nasty.
Least to say, his parents were not happy. But instead of being rightfully scolded, Bakugo had taken the blame for it.
They found him attempting to clean it up and assumed it was his fault. You wanted to correct them, but he threw you a nasty glare, sealing your mouth shut. He was now under punishment until they deemed fit and from then on, he hadn't spoken a friendly word to you.
A little sigh escaped your lips. Your two friends looked at each other before offering you encouraging smiles.
“Hey,” one spoke, placing a hand on your knee. You met her gaze. “You should go give it to him. He’d love it.”
There was a moment of silence before you decided to act. Taking the spur of confidence, you stood up and briskly made your way to the other classroom. Just before you entered, you heard his voice and felt your heart waver with anxiousness.
However, now wasn’t the time to let doubt consume you. Things wouldn’t get better until something was done.
You took a deep breath, calming your nerves, before opening the door and walking in. Your eyes scanned the room and found the young dragon prince amongst his group of friends.
Jaw set, you walked over to them, hands firmly around the packaged food.
Kirishima saw you first and gave you a friendly wave.
“Hey Princess L/N!”
“Hi boys! How’re ya doing?” you politely asked, putting on your best smile.
They gave you an upbeat answer that lifted your spirits.
Despite that, you hadn't heard a response from Bakugo. In fact, he hadn't even looked at you—but you wouldn’t be disheartened. You fueled herself with faux confidence and held out the dish to your betrothed.
“I-I made you something small yesterday, as an apology,” you stuttered.
Katsuki finally looked up, indifference in his stare. Ruby eyes flickered down to the box filled with rice, chicken, vegetables, and a small pastry on the side. His favorite kind. For a moment, he seemed like considered your offer, but you suffered the low blow of humiliation when he turned away to look through the window.
“Thanks, but I’ve already eaten. Should’ve given it to me earlier.”
Something in your stomach fell. Crushing rejection blossomed up your throat with each passing second. His words were cold, harsh, and unforgiving. It might’ve been stupid, overdramatic even, but it hurt.
Heartbroken wasn’t even the word.
Your nose burned, eyes blurring before you could stop it. Your chest tightened with embarrassment. Luckily, you mustered enough strength to hold in whatever was threatening to crumble you.
“Oh,” you dumbly responded.
“I’ll take it!” Kaminari excitedly said.
“No, I will! I’m still starving!” Kirishima chided.
You placed the box down, struggling to keep up your act.
“Split it between the both of you. I hope it’s good!” You internally winced over how high your voice had become. “I’m gonna to get going now. I’ll see you guys after school, yeah?”
And before anything else was said, you bolted straight out of the room. You hadn’t bothered to look at Katsuki. Knowing him, he probably hadn't noticed the strain in your voice.
As soon as you were out of sight, the tears flooded. You held your hands against your mouth, desperate to muffle your cries. You quickly took you into the nearest bathroom and you prayed no one had seen you lest there be questions. If you went to your friends, it’d cause a commotion. Your parents would eventually find out and you didn’t want any more problems.
So, you cried your eyes raw and eventually willed yourself to stop when it was time to return to class.
The week had gone by without another interaction. The weekend brought you some relief since you wouldn’t be forced to see Katsuki’s face for the time being. Or so you thought.
All you wanted to do was run some errands for your parents and then go back home and continue sulking. Yet the universe would not let you rest.
The moment you caught Bakugo’s eyes, you pivoted on your heel and booked it the other way. You assumed his anger with you would force him to keep his distance.
But you were thoroughly surprised to find he was following after you.
“Y/N,” he called.
Irritation and hurt filled your chest. You only walked faster, clutching the purse against her chest.
“Y/N, stop,” he demanded to which you promptly ignored.
This went on for a good thirty seconds until Bakugo decided he had enough. Without much noise, he ran up to you, grabbing you by the shoulder.
You weren’t having it.
You harshly shrugged off his hand. “Don’t touch me,” you snapped, keeping your eyes forward.
“I need to talk to you,” Katsuki grumbled.
“Well I don’t want to talk to you. So maybe some other time.”
Truthfully, the crowned prince found himself shocked at your coldness. Despite your innate boldness, he wasn’t used to such an icy tone. Especially directed at him.
His father warned him to never attack in these situations, but Bakugo let his temper get the best of him. His first reaction was to frown and deal back harsher words.
“What’s your fucking problem, dumbass? When I say stop, stop!”
A spike of anger flooded your veins. You whirled around on your heel and glared at him with frosty eyes. You felt compelled to drop your papers and slap him, but instead, you settled for a finger in his face.
“First of all, I’m not some dog you can just order around, you jerk! And just because we’re betrothed doesn’t mean I’m some girl you can treat like dirt whenever you feel like it! Until you apologize, leave me alone because my only problem right now is you. Bye.”
And just as quickly as you came, you turned to leave.
Now Bakugo was actually stunned. Forget, cold, this was a side of you he hadn't ever experienced. Admittedly, he hadn’t been spoken to like that from anyone besides his mother—and she only got away with it because she was not only the queen…but he was his mom.
Katsuki honestly didn’t know how to handle it. It was only then that he concentrated back on his father’s advice. Whenever his mother was upset with his dad, his father would fight back, but never with emotional anger. Always with humbleness and an understanding tongue.
It usually did the trick considering his mother could never stay upset with him for more than a night. It always struck the teen with hidden awe. Sometimes, Katsuki thought his dad was an angel.
Bakugo was no angel, but he hoped it’d have the same affect on you.
The blonde teen softened his face and walked up behind you. He stopped you, wrapping his arms around your waist to lie his forehead against the decorated braids the fell down your back.
“Damn it. I’m sorry okay?” he lowly said, face burning from such a public display of affection. “Just hear me out.”
You didn’t speak and he clenched his jaw.
“Please.”
You inwardly cursed your rapidly beating heart. If it weren’t for how stupidly nice being in his arms was (he was definitely working out more), and the fact that you found him kinda cute begging for your permission, maybe you wouldn’t have caved in so easily.
For now, you’d blame it on the fact that you two were destined to wed. It was better to start dealing with fights now so, hopefully, the future held less of them.
You heaved a sigh, unwillingly ignoring your body’s urge to curl in his arms. Instead, you pulled away and turned to face him. You peered into unsure crimson eyes with as much harshness you could conjure.
“Fine. Speak,” you permitted.
There was a small pause as he gathered his thoughts. When he opened his mouth, you instantly regretted it.
“I’m still mad at you for being dumb and breaking one of family’s treasures. And I’m still fucking pissed that my old hag is on my ass about it,” he started and noticed how your eyes narrowed in contempt.
You were about to turn away, thinking this was a waste of time. However, Bakugo took a hold of your wrist before you could leave.
“Leave me alone! If you didn’t want to get in trouble, you should’ve just let me take the blame. I can't believe I thought you’d apologize—“
“Let me finish, princess.”
It was your title, yet you felt your stomach flip when it came from his lips. You refused to let it influence you…but you’d give him another chance.
Bakugo stepped closer to you. “I’m upset, but I took the punishment because I wanted to. You didn’t mean to break it. Accidents happen, I understand that.”
There was a pregnant pause. Then, you softened your gaze a bit, eyes still lit with inquiry. “Why? Why would you do that if it meant getting in trouble? I could’ve taken the blame just fine.”
“Y/N, you freak the fuck out whenever you don’t get a perfect score on an exam. You try not to mess up and when you do, it’s like the world is ending,” he explained with a teasing smirk. You ungracefully snorted. He had a point. “When you broke the vase, I could hear your heart drop. You were two seconds away from crying. And when I saw how scared you looked I just—I don’t know.”
The look on your face was something between shock, surprise, and wonder. You blinked, thick lips parting slightly in awe.
“Katsuki…” you breathed to which the boy heavily blushed. Realizing how sappy he sounded, his mind screamed at him to cut it out.
Bakugo looked down and noticed he was still holding your wrist. He quickly let go and instinctively rubbed the nape of his neck.
“D-don’t be dramatic. I just didn’t wanna see you moping around or some shit. My father said that it wasn’t that important anyway…the vase I mean,” he mumbled.
Sure it wasn’t, you thought. What were you gonna do with this boy?
You supposed an apology was a good start.
“That was very nice and admirable of you Katsuki. Thank you,” you eventually said. “I’m still really sorry about the vase, and for being mean to you just now.”
He shook his head. “I know, but I’m the one that should be apologizing. I ain’t hafta treat you the way I did. I was being an ass for not accepting the food you made for me earlier.”
“Yeah you were, ya bastard.”
He chuckled at that. “The two idiots wouldn’t stop raving over how good it was.”
“Well, I had the best teacher in the kingdom,” you grinned.
“And I had an even better student,” he winked.
Your smile widened. Maybe marrying him wouldn’t be so bad.
You couldn’t help yourself when you heartily embraced him, enjoying how his arms slowly slithered around the small of your back. Your eyes met and you kissed him on the lips, leaving him with a little gasp. You pulled away and giggled under your breath.
“You know, you're a sweet guy underneath all that false bravado.”
“False brav—what the hell are you going on about!?”
Ignoring his explosive behavior, you readjusted the straps on your shoulder before turning on your heel.
“Don’t bring anything for lunch on Monday, okay? I’ll see you later, blondie.”
Despite his little tantrum, Bakugo still watched you disappear into the store with a gentle expression. You gave him more headaches than he cared for, but you were worth it. Besides, he was sure you could say the same for him.
Bakugo turned to leave and passed his fingertips over where your lips touched his own.
He’d never admit to the giddiness in his chest. He’d take that shit to the grave.
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akumaalert · 3 years
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not a request just sharing bc i couldn't stop thinking of just "what if lucky called heis good boy" like how he calls her good girl sometimes but like.. i'm pretty sure he would break
This was supposed to be a mini-fic....but...uh....it'll likely be the first chapter of "Divergence" instead LMAO But hope you enjoy!
Good Boy
Karl Heisenberg x Reader, Explicit
CW: Masturbation, Accidental Voyeurism, Voyeurism, Happy Ending, Virgin!Karl Heisenberg
An AU happening during chapter 19 of "Heavy Metal Lover" but can be read without reading the main story.
"Unfh..."
That had been the first noise from Lucky besides the scratch of a pencil against paper that he had heard in about an hour.
Stuck in his office with her as he searched for a misplaced - not lost, just misplaced! - core schematic, Heisenberg tried to ignore the nagging thought of how domestic the space had become. Lucky never moved his things - something he was infinitely grateful for. He could recall too well his ever boiling frustration at having his room "cleaned" when living in the castle. The maids were well-meaning, but always adjusting. The room he had held would have felt more his own had he been able to move his own furniture around without the chambermaids fawning over him.
"No, no, young Lord Heisenberg! This is all wrong...off you go...go play...we will fix this mess."
Now on his own and in his element of chaos, he felt comforted, even if secretly so, that Lucky never seemed to complain.
Comforted...but cautious.
The day at the stronghold seemed stamped into his memory...right in the front for all to see. It remained a wonder Lucky didn't see it on his face.
The knowledge.
The horrible, horrible knowledge.
Love.
Staring at an old newspaper clip-out that he had saved with a picture of a modern car on its faded pages, he absently pushed the glasses back up his nose.
It tired him - the constant need to flip back and forth between acknowledging his feelings and thrusting them as far down as he could manage. Drowning them out with that beautiful sound of cinching machinery. Allowing them to seep into him with every laugh from her lips.
Heisenberg was starting to fall in love with the woman. The woman he had failed to kill - the lucky one to survive his maze. The woman his mother expected him to impregnate in order for Miranda's mad vessel to be born and to be killed all in the name of misery.
Misery otherwise known as Eva.
Slowly but certainly, Lucky was driving him insane. Reminding him of things he could never, ever have. Teasing him over and over for days on end.
Heisenberg remembered all too well his reason for entering the office. He had nearly sliced his own arm clean off his shoulder when he lost himself to his situation. To the possibility that, despite his body being so ill-suited for the task, Lucky could have his child. Would want his child. His thoughts, as they so often did, snapped back to the need for freedom - for the need for the arms to come loose from his latest corpse to transform them into one of his many soldiers.
But the more he thought of freedom, the more she sat in the background of his mind.
The more she sat there, the more his tired musings began to stitch together.
The more freedom and Lucky - the two dreams of his world - became intertwined.
He had been thinking of her - of Lucky - beside him the day that he won freedom from the village.
Won freedom...and her.
"You did it, Heis! You did it!"
Lucky would never know how dear it was to him...the fact that her emotions ran so freely with her very being. Beaming. She would do nothing less than beam at him. Her eyes would glow and crinkle at their tails as they did when she gave him her most genuine smiles.
"You did it. You're free. Our...our family is free."
"...family?"
She would grab his hand. Just one. He needed the other steady on her cheek.
Lucky would bring that hand clasped in her own to her belly.
"Our family..."
"Our...another...another Heisenberg?"
In his dreams, she shyly escaped his gaze to nod.
"You...you haven't been alone. Not with me. Not with the start of our family. But now...now, Heis..." Her eyes popped back up all soft and sincere. "Now you'll never be alone again. Not with our baby Heisenberg on the way..."
The only break from his reverie was the slice to one of his favorite stained t-shirts. Only the fact that it was Heisenberg's powers directing the saw had it falling to the floor instead of through his tensed skin.
Heisenberg could only stand in shocked silence. The arm that had been spared from the violence came to grab his shoulder. Though no injury had occurred, he felt stabbed all the same.
Family...and joy?
Lucky...with him?
Another Heisenberg...alive?
A thought washed over him like ice entering his veins.
A boy or a girl...would we have a boy or a girl first?
First.
As if Lucky wished to be objected to more of his perverted and preposterous daydreams.
When he left the room, the metal was still shaking.
"Gotta get that fucking schematic...keep forgetting it...keep going to the office and...fuck...keep talking to her. Gotta stop fucking talking to her. Schematic. Get the fucking schematic."
Lucky had been asleep in bed when he first entered. A rushing relief to his soul. But as the search for the schematic went from flipping through one file to frantically reshuffling the wayward stack the paper should have been in, he knew it was only a matter of time before she would appear.
"Oh...ah!" Lucky yawned all cute and squeaky. "Good morning, Heis."
"Morning," he said flatly. "You...you move any of these lately?"
"No," she said sleepily. "I don't touch those...way above my pay grade. What are you looking for?"
"Core schematic," he grumbled. "Not fucking here...where the hell did I put it?"
Though Lucky made a very pointless questioning noise, she said nothing as she sat down and began her daily transcriptions. Hell, he had been grateful. She showed concern because she was simply a good person beneath all of the trauma and the terror she had reigned on his self-image. But she didn't pry or attempt to enter his space afterward where she would clearly only be in the way.
But that was before her second moan filled the office.
"What's wrong with you?" he asked, never looking up from his stack of papers.
A frustrated sigh and a grumble came from the desk chair.
"Think I slept on my neck funny last night," she said. "Doesn't help that my posture is shit. Just making it impossible to find a good angle to work in."
Growing agitated at his fruitless search, Heisenberg whipped around to look at her. "Want some help?"
"Mmn?"
"Want a massage or something?" he offered. "A...ha! You'll find this funny. Supersized one up in the castle? Used to love to make me massage her neck when I was a kid. Fucking manual labor when I was barely old enough to write. Had maids to do it - an assload at that - and forced me to instead."
Raising an eyebrow at him, Lucky frowned. "Was it...did she...did she hurt you? Like...if you didn't do it?"
"Ah nah," he said, taking careful steps over to Lucky. "Told you...when I was a kid, I was off limits. I whine about it now...but...well...I was a kid. Bitch loves kids. So I had to massage her back...but only part of this stupid salon thing we used to do together. It was nothing. Stupid. Just like her."
He did not know what to make of Lucky's face. Tilting her head, she steadied a look on him that could only be called curious.
"It's...it's a good memory? Of Alcina when you were small?"
Heisenberg scoffed.
"It's a memory," he said, standing behind Lucky with a wide stance and an even wider stare at her neck. "Not good or bad...just...there. Now...where's it hurt, kid?"
Raising a hand, Lucky placed her fingers on a section of her neck before swirling her touch.
"Ah...there...like just this one spot, but fanning out..."
"Okay...looks like your C7."
"My what now?"
Chuckling, Heisenberg moved her hand out of the way. "Your C7 vertebrae. Duck your chin down so I can get in here properly."
Doing as she was told, Lucky's head moved forward and Heisenberg placed his gloved hands against her neck. His thumbs encased the pained area and began to move in slow yet sturdy circles.
Lucky immediately began squirming.
"Can you maybe try without the gloves?" she asked. "Those are like...rough or something."
Casting off his gloves quickly, Heisenberg rolled his shoulders before trying again. "Wah, wah, wah...doing you a favor and you're out here complaining. That better, your highness?"
"Yes, actually," she said, relaxing. "And thank you. Asshole."
Puffing air out of his mouth, Heisenberg merely shook his head as he kneaded her skin.
"Mmn!"
Heisenberg tried to hide his stillness by immediately starting to massage her skin again.
But the noise could not be ignored.
"What was that?"
"Your hands...they're so warm. Fuck...feels good."
"Oh..." he said dumbly. Blinking down at her, he turned his head away as he kept his fingers in motion.
The fact that his cock had begun to waken in his pants was not lost on him.
"Are you using your electric powers? Is that why it feels so good?"
"Nah...really shouldn't do that on the living above the waist."
Above the waist...but below the waist...
"Ah," he continued, running his teeth over the scar on his lower lip. "Cause of the heart or whatever. Probably your brain too from this angle. Could fry both without meaning to. And I was working...earlier. Probably why they feel hot."
Lucky sighed as he continued to work her neck. His fingers were sweeping but slow. He had started off so intently and so rough. What had happened?
I felt her skin. Felt her beneath me. Felt her neck...for all she knows I could snap it right now and instead of being afraid she's welcoming me...she trusts me...trusts me enough to let me do this...
The next round of his fingers on her neck dipped into skin purposeful in their worship.
Her response was immediate.
"Oh...oh...good boy," she whispered.
To say he was lost for words was like calling water wet.
Though he kept his massage in a rhythmic round, his eyes were wide as they could possibly be behind his glasses. So wide that they hurt.
What the hell did she just do to me?
If he had to go off of physical injury, he would say she punched him in the stomach with all the force of a train running at full speed.
If he had to go off of an attack to his psyche, he would say she wormed her way into some long buried and forgotten wire that sent his entire brain into overdrive.
If he had to go off the erection now straining against his paints, he would say that he was royally fucked.
"You really are so good at this," she said, her voice still breathless. "Good boy...my good boy, Heis."
Heisenberg snatched his hands away as if Lucky were lava.
"Wait! No...what's wrong?" she asked, turning slightly to look at him.
If she looks down...if she sees...
"GOTTA TAKE A SHIT!" he exclaimed suddenly.
Lucky's mouth dropped open as she gaped at him.
Then she nodded with a laugh playing at her lips.
"Yeah. Go. Just come back and finish your massage."
Before he could finish blinking, he found himself storming down the hallway.
Well...intending to storm. His gait was impacted a bit by his dick standing at full mast and his hands hurriedly attempting to unbuckle the straps around his pants.
So FUCKING dumb. A shit? Really? he thought, visibly grimacing. It would have probably been less embarrassing to admit I was about to jack it to her calling me hers.
Hers...her good boy...good...I'm her good boy...hahaha...
What am I? A fucking dog?
...don't answer that.
Rushing into the break room, he considered the couch before catching sight of the bathroom. With a flick of one wrist as his other hand pulled his cock from his underwear and pants, Heisenberg slammed open the bathroom door.
He managed to slide his pants down his legs as he sat on the toilet and closed the door with the weakest of hand movements.
Finally free from judgment, Heisenberg hissed as he fumbled his glasses to the nearby counter and took himself into his hand.
"Good boy...her good boy...fuck...fuck yeah I am, baby..."
A groan and a grunt fell from his lips as he jerked his hand along his shaft.
All too often this act had been nothing but release from tension. An exploration so technical and so tedious as to be boring. But now with Lucky at his side and in his bed - however platonically she slept there - the images that plagued him seemed vibrantly real and tempting in their joyful teasing.
Imaginings - hopes and dreams and fantasies - that he could only cling onto in the moment.
The desk.
He would take her right on that same desk she was taking notes on.
"Oh, Karl," she would say, despite not knowing his first name. "Gonna be my good boy?"
"Yes," he said aloud, eyes closing and mind prickling with sights of her and waves of pleasure.
Lucky would be splayed on his desk - lying on her back and presenting herself to him as if she were a meal to be consumed instead of a darling treasure to worship.
"That's good...only good boys are allowed to fuck me. Isn't that what you want?"
"Yes...yes...god fucking damnit. YES." Huffing and hating the tremble in his thighs, Heisenberg bucked into his hand. "Yes...only me...wanna be your good boy. I'll be so good for you. Only you, Mein Schatz..."
A dirty laugh from her lips. The Lucky of his dreams becoming more and more defined as she palmed one breast and teased her clit with the fingers of her other hand.
"Mmm...know what you're saying you know...my treasure...that's so cute...been feeling the same way about you lately...thinking of you...dreaming of you...my good boy want to tell me what else he's been feeling? Mmn? Big boy wanna tell me before you put your cock inside of me?"
Lips loose along with his pleasure, Heisenberg found he could not build his voice to say the words aloud.
So he mouthed them instead. Mouthed them and stuttered in his quest for pleasure as his hand curled about his shaft at the "lah" tipping silently from his tongue.
"Oh, darling..." A smile. She'd smile. Genuine and sweet and sincere and all for him. "I love you too, Karl."
"Mmnnn....ah...fu-UCK!" With a panicked inhale, Heisenberg quickly pinched the head of his cock to prevent his end from coming too soon. "No, no, no...not yet...not yet...please..."
Though the pleasure was unlike anything he had previously experienced and his calves clenched in protest of a release delayed, his oncoming orgasm stalled and began to fade.
"Such a good boy," said Lucky, eyeing him in his fantasy like she would look at a drink of water on a hot day. "That's right. You don't come until I tell you to. Understand?"
A nod of his head.
"Good, good boy. My good boy. Good Karl. Come on...think it's time you got your treat...here...I'll help you..."
With her fingers moving to fully expose the inside of that wet and preciously pink pussy of hers, Lucky looked up at him with a lidded look.
Heisenberg had no experience with another person when it came to handling his physical pleasure. Hell, with any pleasure or positive feeling at all. Except maybe the triumph of victory over others, he had never had the chance to experience happiness - true happiness and trust and faith in another soul.
Until her.
And for her...for her he would indulge and give himself freely...if only locked away inside of his mind.
Inexperience taking a back seat to passion, he pictured himself guiding his cock into her waiting and welcoming body. Maybe he would steady himself with a hand on her hip or simply with a heated stare into her eyes.
He all but strangled his cock to try to mimic a feeling he had never known and had never thought to miss before her.
"Uh-huh," whined Lucky in his dreams. "Oh...you're so big...fill me up just right. So fucking thick..."
"Hah...ah...your good boy big enough for you?"
"Yes...oh yes...yes...so big...such a perfect dick...please...please Karl...Heis...please, baby, please...Heis?"
When he began to rut into his own hand with a purpose, he felt flames like that of standing directly beside the blaring crucible dancing across his cheeks. Though some of his daydream seemed vague and hard to read, he had enough to know that he could not delay the inevitable for much longer. Lucky - the real and actual Lucky - was still waiting for him back in the office. Waiting and none the wiser to his desperate need for her affection. It sickened him - the want for anything and everything to do with her.
Sickened him...and sent electric shocks of white pleasure down his spine.
"So fucking perfect...you're so fucking perfect for me, Lucky...oh..."
"Heis..."
"Huh...ah...already so close...so damn worked up...can't stand it...can't stand you looking like that..."
"Like what?"
Heaving and heatedly squirming where he sat, Heisenberg noticed for the first time that one of his boots jutted up and down on the floor beneath him. As if his entire body refused to be still.
"Most beautiful fucking thing I've ever seen," he bit out. "Please...please, Luck...I know it's soon...but please..."
A tilted head and a gentle grin. A pointer finger that danced around her clit and drew his eyes away only long enough for her to breathe out shallow and short. His eyes snapped back to hers immediately.
"Please what?"
"Please let me come...let me come inside you...wanna...wanna take you...claim you...don't want you with anyone else ever again."
Glinting eyes and lush eyelashes.
"You're gonna be all that to me, Heis? Well...in that case..."
Her lips finding his own. His very first kiss - albeit imaginary. Her lips soft but without taste. His own lips puckering even as they trembled from the need for more.
"In that case," she continued, taunting him in his ear. "Come, Heis. Be a good boy and come for me."
Hindsight would have him chastising himself for not thinking to grab some tissue. In the moment, however, he was too busy panting and watching his cum dot the floor in thick strips. Heisenberg growled...tried to hold on to the image of her with one eye still closed.
Reality settled in on him. Settled in even as his stomach quivered underneath his shirt and his orgasm began to relax into his bones. It was pleasant and his every nerve seemed to stand on edge. Tingles of pleasure radiated from his chest to his feet flat against the floor. Gulping in air, he knew he had never come so hard before in his life. It was good...great even.
But it was not her. It was not enough.
Clean up was a quick and tedious affair. Lucky could not know what he had done in her quarters. The tissues he found too late to wipe his seed from the floor were tossed and flushed away. He checked the room once and then again once his shades were back on his face.
Finishing the belt at the top of his pants, he cleared his throat before exiting.
The television in the break room still hummed though it sat completely dead in the meager light from the ceiling.
Shit...glad she wasn't in here. Never had anyone here to care about when I got down to business...no telling what my powers do with electronics...
The schematic. He had to find that damn schematic.
Trying to level his breathing as he stalked the hallway, Heisenberg considered the day before him. Lucky had not wished to attend a revitalization attempt with him yet. While he didn't intend to push her into seeing something that might scar her again, it might be worthwhile to have her eyes in the room at some point. She hadn't complained about the notes yet. Maybe he should offer? Make it sound like a small deal and let her in when it was near completion? Give her a taste before exposing her to more?
Fucking stupid...it's all so fucking stupid...what happened to me? If she were any assistant, I would just drag her ass there and have her record the whole thing. Fuck me with all this concerned shit.
But she's not just any assistant...
Entering the office, he stilled at the doorway when he saw Lucky facing him from her chair.
"Uh...hey," he said, licking his lips. "Sorry about that. Took...ah...let's just forget it."
"Actually," she began. "I need to be honest with you. Because of what happened before..."
Eyebrows shooting up, he stood in silence before she continued.
"Um...so...I was sitting here...sitting here and trying to rub my neck or whatever..."
"Yes?"
"Well...the radio came on and it freaked me out a little bit..." She paused, her fidgety look dropping to the floor. "But...the more I listened...the more I...recognized your voice."
"My...my voice?"
"Yes."
Heisenberg could not move. He shouldn't be looking at her, but he was afraid if he blinked that the tension would break and she would begin laughing or cursing or, worst of all, apologizing.
"Umm...it...I heard you. And I guess you were...I guess it was real time." A tent of her fingers and a swallow in her throat. "I heard your comment and responded and...I think...I think you could hear me too. Possibly? You seemed to...seemed to be replying to what I said directly."
Shame. Shame for a million years fell on his shoulders that had felt so light before.
"Where?" he managed to say. "Where did you come in? What comment did you respond to?"
How she looked at him, he had no idea. She was far braver than he could ever be. Heisenberg planned to face down Miranda without a single hesitation one day on that glorious battlefield where his freedom could be won.
But now? Faced with Lucky standing and walking toward him with the full weight of her eyes upon him?
He looked away.
"You said...you asked me if my good boy was big enough for me."
The purr in her voice. The sound of her steps growing closer. The burn in his throat.
"After that," she said. "I called your name...I...responded to you and you to me."
"That didn't...I..." He shook his head. "I...umm..."
"Can I hold your hand?"
Head shooting up, Heisenberg caught her heated look. The same heated look she had worn in his dreams.
He nodded. Nodded even though he barely registered it until she took his hand and steps to press herself flush against him.
When she spoke, it was hushed and low.
For him and him only.
"I'm going to go to the bathroom...freshen up. Since we know you can communicate from the radio to the television...I want you to tell me when it's okay to come back here. I'm giving you two options."
Heisenberg hung on her every word and looked at her as if she controlled his every movement.
"The first...you can leave. Can give me enough time to go there...find what you were looking for...then tell me you're off to do whatever. I won't mention this again. We won't mention it."
Silence fell between the two of you. A crackle of the radio to the side of the room.
"And the other option?" he asked, voice nearly breaking.
A shy look. A happy tilt of her lips.
"The other option...you can rest for a bit before I come back here and make whatever fantasy you were having come true."
A mouth drier than dry left his tongue feeling too large. Too large and too needed to swipe across his lips.
"You don't have to answer now-"
"The second one," he said. "Second one. Want that one. Screw the first one."
A bright and happy smile. A smile that crinkled the tail of her eyes and lit up her face.
She was beaming at him. Squeezing his hand before parting from him.
Not for long...not for damn long if he could help it.
"You give me the word then, good boy," she teased, walking out of the room.
Legs nearly buckling and sending him to the ground, Heisenberg took uneasy steps to his office chair before throwing himself on it. His entire body buzzed, though it seemed far less like electricity and far more like promise and hope. Not love on her end...not yet. But a maybe. Potential.
More.
Grinning stupidly and looking at the desk, he made quick work of clearing the area for the fun he planned on having from his daydream to come true.
As soon as he picked up the recorder Lucky used to transcribe his notes, Heisenberg saw it.
That damned schematic.
His last visit to this same room. A note on said schematic stating "DON'T FORGET" in large words. A note he carelessly put there before guiding Lucky to sit down to look at her transcriptions and laugh with her over the sixth stable boy in one week to die of drunken stupidity.
Quietly and contentedly, he opened the desk drawer to stuff the schematic inside.
"Mmn...don't think I'll need you for a while yet actually..." Eyeing the radio on the wall, Heisenberg tossed his glasses to the table and tried to slick and perfect the wiry hair about his head. "Oh, Lucky, honey...room is ready whenever you are...and so is your good boy."
103 notes · View notes
jiminrings · 3 years
Note
umm maybe this is me projecting bc i am messaging you during my break but for a drabble request, yoongi in a retail setting???? 😐😐😐😐 oc could either be a co-worker or a regular customer who asks too many questions 😔😌
Tumblr media
retail-type beat
drabble week: day three
drabble week masterlist
pairing: customer!yoongi x retail worker!reader
wordcount: 3k
glimpse: "hi! almost thought you were hiding from me for a second. anyways, is this sweater wool or cotton?"
feedback + support mean the world to me!!
the last time you checked, work doesn’t start until nine
you kNEW it doesn’t start until 9 in the morning, so clearly that’s why you’re just wearing slides instead of your sneakers
the company uniform is either black or purple (it has to be from what the store is selling though so you can get to choose) with of course!!!! a lanyard!!!!
and you know this, because you’re still wearing your slides from home because it isn’t opening time yet
“goddamn it, i forgot to bring my slippers,” jin moans the moment he walks to see you, looking down on your feet that only reminds him he’d be stuck in his cool yet painfully uncomfy sneakers
he’s probably the only co-worker that you’re truly close with, not feeling the urge to sell him just to get a free day
“i told you to get the sneakers that nurses use!!”
hands-down one of the best purchases you’ve ever made
retail’s hard and it’s not exactly the best-paying job!!! thankfully the franchise owner is a bit more generous so that’s why you get slightly-higher hourly pay
“i would if they looked a little more seasoned,” jin snorts and stubbornly crosses his arms, “i might sacrifice my pride and buy some compression socks.”
OOOOOH THOSE ARE GOOD TOO
makes you feel like ur walking on air
but lol no seokjin isn’t ready to buy those just yet
he’ll settle on some blisters and putting salonpas patches because they look cooler that way, thank u very much <3
jin yawns, talking about finding a steam iron somewhere to replace a blowdryer so he could break in his shoes
“you wipe the glass this time.”
oh right he absolutely hates wiping down the glass — even before opening!!! even when there aren’t any grubby kids that would soil it instantly with their equally as grubby hands
you don’t mind it honestly
you might honestly like it
you prefer wiping the glass a hundred times over than steaming clothes
there is nOT a single thought in your head when you spray on the solution to the glass, rag and squeegee tucked between your fingers when-
maybe you should’ve hOLY FUCKING SHIT
it’s not opening!!!! it is nOT nine o’clock in the morning!!!!
you know that the shop you’re working in is pretty fucking famous and it’s located on one of the most populated streets ever BUT THERE’S ALREADY SOMEONE
although the bucket hat seems familiar from a distance and-
oh it’s just yoongi
yoongi?
yoongi’s already here????
:O
yoongi, the guy in question, is an always customer!!
no, not a regular customer — an always customer
he comes every week and maybe even twice within that period
he’s a nice talkative customer who likes asking questions and even occasionally guides the other customers on what to buy and where to find it
he’s yoongi!!! of course that’s expected of him
he’s been going here long since you ever started working here, and jin keeps iNSISTING that he’s been here more frequently since you started like a year ago
but doesn’t he come at eleven in the morning?
“woah, yoongi’s already here? — doesn’t he come at eleven in the morning?”
?!!?!!
“i was just thinking the exact same thing.”
jin bangs the glass with his fist and you automatically wince and frown
you dO like cleaning the glass panes!! you didn’t say you liked cleaning them a second time :(
“YOONGI!”
“YES??”
you push jin’s fist away to wipe at the smudge his hand left
“IT’S NOT OPENING YET!”
“I KNOW!!”
wow they’re uh
they’re really loud
sometimes you forget how seokjin could be since it’s been awhile since you heard him yell
lol no one’s been shoplifting recently so you haven’t been hearing him
a mind-blowing idea is for jin to come outside and talk to him in a normal talking voice, so your ears would stop ringing
“HEY! WHAT IF YOU JUST ENTER EARLY IN?”
“REALLY? IS THAT EVEN ALLOWED??”
"YOONGI, EVERYONE ON THE FLOOR KNOWS YOUR NAME. NAMJOON EVEN GAVE YOU A CUSTOMARY BIRTHDAY GIFT, AND WE DON'T GIVE CUSTOMARY BIRTHDAY GIFTS TO ANY OTHER CUSTOMER!!"
namjoon, who technically should be called mr. kim because no one really thinks to call the franchise owner with their government first name, is actually pretty cool
but he's too busy these days and haven't been visiting because he's too busy tending to his newly-opened coffee shop
as if the money he earns from opening his franchise in a day alone isn’t enough :0
"IF YOU SAY SO?"
you’re the one who hikes up the roll-up door in the slightest, enough for only yoongi to enter and not encourage anyone else to nOT enter when it’s still not opening time!!!!
he only has to crouch a little but he still has to dust his thousand-dollar pants as if he crawled through mud
his cream-colored slacks with a large black hoodie that has a giant bear embroidered on the middle of it and mules
... you don't hate his outfits
pretty cute, actually
it's yoongi!!
you'd never catch him lacking!!!
you don't even have to envision him rocking the shit out a paper bag
one time, he came in the store wearing the WRINKLIEST brown linen jumpsuit that no iron could possibly fix and he still pulled it off
toon-teen-ten!
oh god that’s the sound of the intercom
and the sound of the intercom equates to jungkook
... as in jeon jungkook who’s the floor manager and his constant top one goal for every month is to endearingly annoy seokjin
he’s young and mischievous!! but if you were to ask him, only you and jungkook are the people in this floor he’d actually get drinks with outside the shop
“seokjin come to the lingerie department right now, please.”
you see the thing is :D
“now this is just funny
there’s walkie-talkies for everyone here!! jungkook likes intercoms, and seokjin like yelling!!
“WHY ME AGAIN?? I’VE ALREADY FOLDED-“
“there’s a literal rat and i need yOU to catch it!! you know that i hate rodents!!”
him and jungkook are forever gonna be on this eldest-youngest brother dynamic and while jungkook pouts and shared the extras that he gets, jin is the one who kills the bugs :D
10/10 totally fair
fine then!! he’ll catch that goddamn rat
that leaves you and yoongi. alone.
“why did you come so early this time?”
you ask out of courtesy, genuinely baffled too because you know that yoongi’s a creature of habit
yoongi’s eyes pop out, head fervently shaking no
“i’m typically not the type to do that, no.”
???
is he-
are you-
are you both talking about the same thing
yoongi’s face flushes in embarrassment, his mind just then registering what you were actually saying
“o-oh! it’s because last night, i dreamt of the sweater i saw here last week!!"
oh right
typical :D
"need me to find it for you or do you already know the aisle?"
you align the folded shirts by the corners as you pass, looking at yoongi briefly while he trails behind yoh
“not unless you pulled it out already."
he's hoping that dear god you haven't
the black sweater with the moon aND buildings on it and when you turn on the flash, the windows of said building reflect it right back???
he SHUDDERS just by thinking about it
it’s gonna go with everything!!! an instant boost of serotonin every time he sees it
"for you, yoongi?" you shake your head, a small smile on your face that he only sees every once in a while, "i'd comb through the entire stock room."
wait
that’s sweet :((
“i’ll hold you to that.”
you know what??? you're less cranky when it's only him, and a couple of hundred people less
your smiles aren't for customer-service and you don't have misplaced clothes hanging from your shoulders and your walkie-talkie isn't talking in latin
or when no one’s asking you to reach something from the top shelf
or when you’re on the way to the intercom because a kid got separated from their mother
or when someone’s approaching for a refund for a shirt who has a stain that’s 100% no doubt customer error
his feet immediately move on its own because he’s memorized the outline of this too many times
there it is!!!
the sweater he’s dreamt about is already on his hands, only a handful few left
the piece is considerably more expensive than majority of the items here, so that’s why they’re all spaced-out instead of being clustered altogether
yoongi rarely goes to the dressing room, regardless if it's a full-house or not!!
he could just look at an item and immediately tell that it’s made for him ta know
he's beyond sure that this sweater fits him perfectly, but he may want to be here a little longer
yoongi may have say inside one of the fitting rooms and spent a little time in it just to sit on the chair inside, not fitting the sweater at all
he's gotten his item SO quick and he wished he could've just walked slower or pretended to not know where it was!!!
he wants to spend a little more time here
you don't hate yoongi!!! but sometimes he could just be... yoongi
he's quite talkative and strikes it whenever, making you unguarded
he could be overbearing but like an overbearing kind of nice
yoongi’s nice!! he’s the type to ask a lot of questions sure, but he’s also the type that would point the other customers what to buy and where to find it
he’s the type to find an obvious faulty stitch on a shirt, but he’d just quietly exchange it instead of asking for the manager
he’s the type you wouldn’t want to stand behind in line because it would take a long time for him to finish, but he’s also the same one who buys giftcards with generous amounts for family and friends
yoongi’s kind of cool and that’s cemented on your mind
"what do you got for me?"
he materializes out of nowhere, spooked because you thought he already ringed up and was out of the store already
it just happens to be ten minutes before opening and you’re doing last-minute arrangements on a new spread
well, yoongi most certainly is still here and his attention’s piqued
“we have... a new collection."
you clear your theory, awkwardly gesturing because you’re more than aware that yoongi hasn’t seen this either
“yeah, i know that. but like, what's going on??" he gestures to the displays and racks, squinting his eyes, "what's the theme? what's the material?"
:O
uhm you haven't read the brief about this
you aren't even sURE if there is one!!
doesn't everyone make up something on the spot in retail
or atleast that’s what seokjin tells you
“the theme," you clear your throat, scratching your temple before gesturing towards the full rack, "is everything."
“everything?
yoongi’s eyebrow is raised, not expecting that answer at all
you look back to the new feature, and nOW that you think about it,, there's no cohesion at all
“y-yes. the shop was going for the theme of uhm, everything... all at once — yeah, that's it. everything all at once."
it’s a nice way to put it when not one bit of the new collection goes together
“hmmmm. i like it,” yoongi nods solemnly and tilts his head, “and the material?"
"the material?"
you repeat, eyesight not the best so you can’t really tell anything off the bat or uh aNYTHING really
"t-the material is shirt."
they're all shirts!!! that’s it
yoongi grimaces in disgust, the first time you’ve seen of it
“what?? you can't say that.”
he outsretches his hand to the nearest article, holding it up by the hanger
"this, right here, is satin. see how it shines like silk, but doesn't feel like silk?"
uhm yes
you have a gist of what he’s saying but yes
yoongi picks up a pink button shirt this time, flipping it inside out
"this, is silk charmeuse. look at the inside, is it smooth?"
okay where is he going with this
he urges you to put your hand on the fabric and uhhh you didn't sign up for this???
it looks smooth, sure!! end of discussion
"yea-..."
“it's not. it's rough. it is smooth, but it's dull. silk charmeuse is still silk, but the backing it has is different from the lustrous part."
okay yoongi
you’re starting to feel uncomfortable and it has to do something with the tone he’s using on you
“can't believe you didn't know that!! how about this," he plucks out a shirt with a tiny print at the middle of it, "cotton or polyester and rayon?"
"i don't-"
there’s an itch in your neck that you want to scratch, a tell-tale sign that you just wANT to remove yourself from this situation
“come on!! it's a dead giveaway!!"
:((
why is he being like this?
toon-teen-ten!
“y/n, panty section please. jin almost got bit by a mouse and he needs comforting. two minutes until opening, people!!"
jungkook speaks at the right moment, and jin’s little incident is enough of a reason for you to bolt
yoongi's still looking at you but you can't afford to embarrass yourself further
“bye. happy shopping."
huh?
yoongi’s face falls when you leave as cold as that!! typically when you were going to show him out (when it’s regular shop hours), there’d be a smile :((
there's not even a customer service smile :(((
yoongi goes to the only cashier that's open so far and it happens to be far away from you and a teary seokjin
seokjin's fine he didn't even get bit!! that much he could say
but are you okay? uhhh you kinda went cold on him by the end and he thought he started on a good note
yoongi doesn't visit for another week and you don't find yourself counting the days until you meet him again
you did not have a devil wears prada moment where anne hathaway has an epiphany for fashion knowledge
you just felt belittled at a job that isn’t exactly what you wanted anyways
needed, yes. but wanted? not exactly
you know that basic knowledge about clothes is required in a retail job like this and you have it!! you do!!!!
you’d know more if only there were actual available resources for employees to know!!! nobody besides yoongi asks anyways
you’d know if you have time to yourself and aren’t working two jobs trying to make ends meet and tHEN you could pull up a book or something!!!
you’d know if your life is as lax as yoongi’s and could have the budget to buy new things for yourself every single week
“jin, i need to ask you something.”
he hums as called, looking at you briefly until you get on with it
“do you know the difference between silk and silk charmeuse?"
he shrugs casually while you're sitting inside one of the closed-off fitting rooms to catch a break, sharing a burger because the store’s packed-packed
why did you ask him? it’s too easy
“one's made by worms, and the other's a pokémon."
that,.,., could not possibly be righti* it brings you a laugh and you honestly don’t even try to correct him
it’s 11:15 and you kNOW it’s time to resume your shift, straightening your shirt because atleast one (1) person would hound you when they see a familiar red lanyard
oh you’re hounded alright
“hi! almost thought you were hiding from me for a second.”
yoongi????
oh
you haven’t seen him for a week and you don’t know what to feel in all honesty
"anyways, is this sweater wool or cotton?"
wow
you're quite speechless as he holds up the item
really?
this thing all over again???
why are you even surprised
the only thing that yoongi gets your customer service smile, fishing your hand from inside the sweater to show him
“70% wool."
that's it???
NO GOOD MORNING????
you're mad at him, aren't you?
he knew it :((
he knew something was wrong but he just didn’t know what
he’s gonna fix this!! he will
which is why the very next day, he takes the day off from his work and comes to the store at a time he knows you’d surely be there
you're on cashier duty and you like it actually :D
you have an option to sit and the way you’re just gonna scan pricetags (and occasionally enter the code if it doesn’t work) is really appealing
“good morning!"
you’re about to grab the items from the basket laid on the counter and your eyes could only see the very familiar hand
the same one you’ve seen go through racks and racks
yoongi??
he sets his items one by one, buying himself more time
the first one is the same exact sweater he came to wait for before opening
“you already bought this."
you tell him even before you could hold it back, looking back at him briefly before you scan the tag
“i know. i just wanted to see you."
oh
oh
yoongi threw a bunch of other items (individually) so it would be a longer talk, but you scan each item quickly that he’s grabbing things from the counter
hand sanitizer!!! hair ties!!! keychains!!!! yeah he needs them
“i'm sorry that i tend to spring shit on you most of the time. you don't need to know the difference between silk and silk charmeuse."
you only chuckle then, a meek smile on your face
"it's okay, yoongi.”
“it's not."
... it’s not?
yoongi fidgets, opening and closing his mouth like he’s nervous!!! he’s never had his credit card cancelled but he could only feel that this type of jitterness is more than the former
“can i make it up to you? no lanyards, no baskets, no customer service?? i don't wanna fuck things up with you."
“don't feel obligated-"
“i know i could be a condescending ass who expects people to automatically know fabric and whatnot, but i wanna make it up to you."
alright yoongi’s a really good apology-maker
you mIGHT be even flustered a little
“you're holding the line, yoongi.”
“i cleared my schedule."
“i haven’t!!!!!” - guy in the back
“dinner at my place at 8. i-i promise to make your hard-earned break after your shift worthwhile!!!"
hmmm
maybe that wouldn’t hurt
“okay. just because you're holding the line."
“fine by me."
:))
yoongi transfers all the items he bought, all but one, to his tote bag
he hands back the paper bag to you, scribbling his address on the back of the receipt before he does
he lingers a little while at the counter, the people behind him ALREADY switching lanes to the one seokjin’s just opened beside you
it's the sweater that he has too
yoongi scratches the back of his head, this time being the meek one
“what? m-matching sweaters for our first date. s'cute."
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lunaastoir · 3 years
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cute things i think the genshin characters would do
characters included: diluc, kaeya, venti, and albedo 
****minor lore spoilers for diluc!****
an: i’m thinking of making this into a series bc this was such an adorable concept to write so lmk if you’re interested 👀 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
diluc 
sorry kind of starting off with something a little sad 
i think diluc would have a habit of rubbing his vision 
ok seems kinda dumb at first but let me elaborate: 
after the death of his father, diluc was quite obviously devastated 
he basically withdrew into himself after letting all the grief, pain, and rage flood his senses
i think during this time of grieving, he would’ve developed this habit of running the pads of his fingers across his vision to calm himself down 
(v similar to katara from atla) 
since his father had always been proud of diluc’s vision, the thought of touching something that reminded him of his father has always been able to bring him some sort of relief no matter how short lived
it serves as a constant memory of his dad and i think being able to have that kind of connection - no matter how small would hold a significance to him 
stressed? you’ll see his fingers dance across his vision as the crease between his eyebrows gradually loosens 
ok here’s a bonus habit (bc the previous one was sad) 
whenever he’s bartending at angel’s share, he always flips the bottles in this cool bartending way before pouring the drinks 
like the whole shabang - flips in the air, shakes it in a way that the drink foams just right 
people are usually v surprised when they see this bc woah mans has got some sKILLS 
but also bc he’s known for being pretty serious and reserved so seeing a “trick” is kind of breaking the stoic image they have of him 
after he’s done pouring the drinks he’s also really precise about closing the bottles 
he makes sure that the caps are on tightly and that nothing is leaking (which ig is another reason why he does flips with them so he can make sure that the bottles are tightly closed) 
yes he’s rich but he also wants to make sure the drinks don’t go bad bc 1) kind of a loss if they do and 2) his customers deserve the best 
sweet man pls protect him <3 
kaeya
when he’s sitting down at his desk, he brings his legs up so he can sit on his chair criss- cross applesauce 
since he’s in his office and the only other person who’s in there with him is jean, he feels like he can drop the suave, charming cavalry captain facade he puts on when he’s in public and just dial it down slightly to who he really is in that moment 
jean doesn’t say a word the entire time even tho she quite obviously notices 
don’t get me wrong, he’s still the smooth talking kaeya but just,,, more relaxed and comfortable?? if that makes sense 
so since he’s a lot more comfortable in his office, he usually folds his legs into his chair bc damn they hurt from walking around all day
this is kinda dumb but i also think he has a lot of ink stains on his hands from writing so whenever he sees a fresh one he just likes to stamp it onto a piece of paper 
usually that piece of paper ends up being an unimportant report that goes to jean 
dw he also has a bunch of pretty small towels in his bottom drawer that he uses to wipe his hands on bc the public can’t see the pretty cavalry captain w ink stains!! the world would end!! 
oH kind of a side note but i also think he would keep a small folded up picture of something klee drew him in his pocket 
he thinks it’s very sweet and he periodically takes it out just to look at it soft for this man 
last one for kaeya but since he wears boots that have the little lip on the bottom (not really a heel but enough to make some noise) he makes sure to always try his best to walk quietly around the streets of mondstadt at night 
if anyone catches him doing it he’ll wave it off and say something like “oh me? i’m just practicing my stealth - it comes in handy when you have to sneak up on enemies you know?” but in reality that’s just bs 
he really just doesn’t wanna risk waking people up <3 
venti
this adorable man is obviously notorious for drinking 
he loves alcohol!! i mean he’s the anemo archon of the city of wine and freedom so is anyone really surprised 💀
anyways venti always jokes abt not having any mora (he really doesn’t he’s not wrong) but he always makes sure to pay his tab at angel’s share 
the only reason diluc lets him drink sm is because at the end of the day, venti always comes through w the mora 
he really is a talented bard so everything he makes in singing and composing music for other people to listen to always goes straight to angel’s share (debatable if that’s for the best or not but i’ll leave that one to you) 
so yeah <3 basically venti pays back his tabs even tho he’s an archon since he doesn’t want people to experience a loss bc of him 
it’s the archon nature coming out but also the venti nature bc he’s a sweet boy 
anyways getting onto the actual habit 🕺
he has a tendency to skip/hop regardless of wherever he’s going 
he uses his anemo elemental skill a lot while doing this just he can feel a light breeze whenever he skips around 
i also think he carries around extra bard strings in his hat bc he thinks it’s a cool party trick to take them out and be like tada i have extra strings no need to worry!!! 
people are usually not that amused but he does it anyway 
also yeah uh those strings sometimes fall out when he’s skipping 💀 
he’ll be hopping and suddenly bOOM they fall out, he loses them, a kitten by the name of prince takes them, and he has to ask for help to find his strings (i believe this is exactly how venti lost his strings to prince during the windblume festival and no i will not take any criticism and if venti says something different he is lying 🔪)
also has a habit of putting his hair into a bun sometimes!!! 
he loves his pigtails but he finds that he gets bored of them occasionally and his hair needs a break from its wavy tresses so he just plops it into a bun instead 
so so cute 10/10 hairstyle he can do my hair 
anyways love this man thanks for coming home <3 
albedo
i had a feeling i would kind of have a hard time w albedo since he is a little hard to read so i hope this is ok LMFAO 
he has paint stains. everywhere. no you cannot change my mind. 
they are subtle tho i will give him that 
you can’t notice that anything is amiss until you really pay attention and then you’ll start to see the pretty pastels and greens of the sunset he was painting up on dragonspine softly smeared across his clothes 
very rarely you’ll see a cute swipe of paint across his cheek or neck and it’s honestly adorable 
he was probably pushing his hair out of his face while he was painting and some excess paint on his finger landed on his cheek :,) 
he doesn’t really care tbh he thinks it’s just a part of him and it really isn’t that noticeable so he just leaves it 
also!!! since he is a big alchemist and he’s constantly working on labs and experiments i think he would accidentally misplace a lot of his written work 
he seems very organized but w someone as intellectual as him w his brain running miles a minute, i’m sure he has definitely forgotten where he’s put stuff away 
so!! in order to help him remember, he has little notes across his lab detailing where everything is 
if he was working on something and he immediately has to put it on hold bc something came up (klee came in demanding attention or sucrose needs help) then he’ll quickly jot down a note and stick it to his desk so he’ll remember when he comes back just in case he forgets 
sucrose as a result has noticed A LOT of notes across the lab and it’s simultaneously funny and endearing 
“started experiment with sweet flowers to try and turn them into a youth elixir: papers --> on the desk right next to klee’s photo” 
final point: he lets klee braid his hair sometimes if she wants to 
she doesn’t really know how given how young she is so she ends up messing up but albedo always walks her patiently through the steps again 
always makes time for klee no matter what bc he really does care a lot abt her :,) 
i love him sm pls 
222 notes · View notes
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Chapter One.
a/n: welcome to the first chapter of wtsgd! i’m so excited for you all to read this story and for what’s to come. please please please support content creators bc we’re doing this for free and it takes up a lot of energy to put out stories. so reblog, leave feedback, and send a message to motivate and support them. happy reading everyone <3
SERIES MASTERLIST | word count: 6.4k
come talk to me about wtsgd! i’d love to know your thoughts!
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March 4, 2017
The trunk was filled with heavy boxes that were labeled with thick black sharpie, which didn’t seem to leave Luciana’s senses; and one too many suitcases filled with her many articles of clothing that she couldn’t get rid of—no matter how hard she tried—since she was too much of a hoarder and every piece of clothing seemed to have a lost memory in them that she tried very hard to think of, which only meant that it was worth keeping. 
A droplet of sweat leaked down the side of her face due to  her nonstop packing and heavy-lifting from her childhood room upstairs to her dad’s car in the driveway. It didn’t help that the sun was beaming down at her with every move like she was on center stage, in front of the spotlight, but it made much more sense for the sun to do that because that’s where she belonged: on stage. 
Moving to Brooklyn, New York from Cambridge, Massachusetts during, what felt like, the coldest but the sunniest day of March wasn’t the smartest move—to be fair, Luciana was never one to make a smart move, anyways—but it was one that needed to be done. Plus, all the lifting seemed to have warmed her up. 
Her destination, or now, home, in New York was one that she’d been anticipating for a while now. She had auditioned for the role as Kim in Miss Saigon on Broadway in November, and she’d gotten a callback in January for the role as the second Kim, meaning she would be on rotation to perform every week or two weeks, so the main Kim could rest. But she would still have to go to rehearsals and be on the side of the stage watching the show just in case she needed to jump in at the last minute. 
It wasn’t her ideal way of playing the main lead, but nonetheless, she was grateful for the opportunity, and she would take any chance that was thrown at her to not only take another step towards her dream, but also another learning opportunity to make her a better actress. 
Little Luci would’ve been so proud of the present Luci because it’d been her dream ever since she was younger, to be on stage and eventually, be on the big screen. Although she was far from completing her dream of being a face in Hollywood, this was a step that would take her to where she wanted to be in the future, and for that, she was proud of herself. 
As a child, Luci had been in various commercials; from being the kid that played with slime and had no lines but to just put on a big smile while the sticky substance ran through her small hands, to being the daughter in a car commercial with one line that said “Are we there yet?” with a groan and a face of exhaustion as if she were the one driving the car. She hoped that these commercials would have someone recognize her talent, to cast her as a Disney star, but that would require moving to California, which her parents were wary of. 
The commercials stopped when she reached middle school. Her early adolescent years consisted of an abundance of attitude and mood swings; Luci was a very tough and determined kid. Her love for acting had grown into a big balloon that was let go and on its way into the galaxy where no one could reach it—where no one could mess with her achieving her dream. 
She would always stand in front of her white wooden framed mirror—with delicately painted colorful flowers around the border—reciting lines that she heard from a television series or the films that she watched, and she would write them down in her blue notebook. Sometimes, her parents would let her search the script up if it was available online. But oftentimes, she would test and challenge her memorization, and listen to it by ear; testing her mind, and eventually, her memorization skills were immaculate by the age of eleven. 
It was perfect timing because by the time she was in middle school, she was able to snatch the roles she wanted when her school’s drama department held school plays. Her family thought that she would start to hate being on stage since school plays always ran until late evening, but being part of the productions had only enhanced her love for her talent, and it only prepared her for a quarter of what her future may look like. 
All in all, from a very young age, she always knew that she wanted to become an actress. The spotlight or the center of the camera was where she always craved to be. 
And she was finally making that dream come true. 
A black Toyota Camry pulled into the space behind the car that was filled with her belongings. Ren and Beatrice, Luci’s lovely parents, both get out of the car with a pink box of donuts—a snack for the road and for when she gets to her new apartment. 
“Ready, Lucky?” Beatrice asked, rubbing her daughter’s back. She was quite bummed to see Luci leave her childhood home, but she’s proud to see Lucky Luci chase her dreams. She was, after all, twenty-five and was bound to move out at some point, but to see it actually happen made Beatrice quite emotional. 
“Ma, please, don’t cry…” Luci frowned as Beatrice pressed her fingertips to the corners of her eyes. She wrapped her arm around her mother’s shoulder, comforting her. “You’re all coming to New York in a month, right? To watch me on stage?” Luci asked, reassuring herself that she would see her family in a different state to rescue her from her loneliness. 
Luci was an independent woman. She could do tasks by herself, go places alone, and she wouldn’t have a problem with it; she enjoyed the company of herself. But to know that at some point she might be alone—that everyone had left her behind or forgotten about her—was what scared her. She needed to know that the people who loved her unconditionally wouldn’t forget about her. 
“Of course we’re going!” Ren exclaimed with a smile that Luci was going to miss seeing everyday. “We can’t miss our baby on the Broadway stage. If we could, we’d go to every damn show that you’re in, but that would be a lot of gas, no?” 
She chuckled, nodding her head. She felt tears pricking her eyes at how supportive her parents were—they’ve always been. If she could, she would take them with her to New York, but her one bedroom apartment and their work said otherwise. 
“Now, Lucky, don’t cry.” It was Beatrice’s turn to comfort her daughter. Like any parent, when they see their child cry, it breaks their heart and they cry too. “We’re gonna see you real soon. You can always come back anytime you want. We’re just a phone call away and we’ll pick you up,” Beatrice said between sniffles. The mother and daughter were embracing so tenderly and comfortingly—enjoying every last moment together until they got to see each other again. 
“Jeez, you’re both the same—always crying!” Ren interrupted, making the two women laugh; and he was glad they found what he said amusing because he couldn’t handle the sad moment. “C’mon here, my Lulu.” Luci settled into her father’s arms, hugging him tightly. She’s always been her dad’s girl, despite having a close relationship with her mother, her relationship with her father was something that felt like home; he always knew what to say and when to say it. It helped that she was the female version of him. “You’re gonna be the best star out there, I’m sure of it. Now, I want you to have fun, alright? The fame, the fortune, the big city…it doesn’t amount to anything if you’re not having the time of your life” He comfortingly rubbed Luci’s back, holding her in a warm and tight squeeze. 
Luci smiled at her father’s words. She was always a bit hard on herself when she would mess up or forget a line or a movement that correlates to a specific line in her script. When she was younger, she would beat herself up for a sliver of a moment; she would cry into her pillow—sobs loud enough that they were heard from downstairs. Luci would think that she wouldn’t become a well-known actress just because of the minor forgetfulness her mind had presented. But Ren would gently tap on her ocean blue door, letting himself in because he knew his daughter didn’t have the energy to get up and let him in, and he would sit beside her, gently urging her to sit up with him. Once she complied, after many groans of refusals, she would be glad she did because her father looked deeply into her eyes—and it was like looking into the reflection of clear and clean water—and told her she was a star. It was only three words, but those three words reminded her to never give up and get up when she would hit the pavement of what she felt like were her fallen hopes and dreams. 
Ren would then end it with a statement of advice that had always lingered in her mind, resonating to the silent and harshful words that she tells herself. ‘Nothing will amount to anything if you’re not having the time of your life.’
A rush of gratitude settled upon her as her eyes became glossier by the seconds she was in Ren’s arms. Beatrice looked at her greatest treasures fondly, a smile appeared on her face only for it to be replaced by a look of confusion. 
“Where is that damn brother of yours? He said he was going to be here at ten!” Beatrice interrupted the sweet moment she was having with her father, making them disconnect from the hug—just as Ren did with Luci and Beatrice.  
Speaking of the devil, her dear brother was making his way towards home on the side of the street, wearing a grey sweatshirt that was stained with his sweat as his earphones were nestled in his ears, loudly playing music. He loudly sang along to some rap song, breath staggered as he rapped along with his hands. 
Nathan smiled once he stepped foot onto the driveway as he took out his earphones, seeing his family look at him vigilantly. Luci laughed, shaking her head. 
“Hey, there’s our superstar, little Ana!” Nathan opened his arms, ready to hug you but she quickly stopped him, curving her spine backwards to deny his hug. Ana had been one of the many nicknames her family had called her when she was growing up from the second half of her name, but Ana seemed to have stuck with Nathan as no one else really called her that, so it was his own personal nickname for her. 
“Ew, please, do not hug me.” Her face wrinkled in disgust from the spell of her brother’s sweat from his run. Nathan chuckled, playfully rolling his eyes before turning towards his parents. 
“Ooh, donuts-”
Beatrice slapped the back of his hand before he even got a chance to open the pink donut box. “Not until you shower and change. Lulu needs to be in Brooklyn by three!” 
“Ow, mother!” Nathan whipped his hand away from Beatrice’s burning slap, although he was just playing around and being dramatic. “But fine, alright. The star always gets what she wants, am I right?” He dropped his head towards Luci, sighing before he hurried inside the house to take a quick shower and change. 
Luci giggled, telling her parents that she would be right back to go up to her room to check if she’d gotten everything, even though she knew that she had everything, she just needed to reminisce alone for a moment. 
Her feet took her up the wooden stairs, where she, for some unknown reason, always spent her time sitting on as she leaned her back against the wall and read or drew. Nathan always found it weird of her when they were doing homework when they were younger, but it was just one of the many fun anecdotes he could tell reporters if he’s asked about their childhood. 
Pushing open her ocean blue door that she never changed because she loved the color, she was met with the emptiness of what was once her sanctuary. Despite the paint on the wall changing, the replacement of furniture, and rearrangement of her childhood room, Luci could still see the baby pink walls where she hung up various posters of her celebrity crushes when she was eight. She could still see herself walking over to her Cinderella white wooden dresser as she pulled out an inflatable microphone from her drawer before she walked over to her bed to sing her heart out with her cousin. In the corner of her room was her mirror that she painted colorful flowers along the border when she was younger, and she definitely did not want to change or get rid of it; it wasn’t difficult to stir up a memory when she was in front of that mirror because up until now, she was always reciting her lines to her own reflection until the late night. 
All of these memories that Luci held within her heart would help her ground herself—remind her where she came from. No matter where her career took her, she would always be the girl that was firstly known in her room, crying, laughing, and acting within the four baby pink walls until she was sixteen, and then it changed to an ecru white. The feeling of nostalgia clutched her chest, and for the second time today—not even noon, yet—she found herself crying. 
She silently sobbed in her sanctuary. Her chest felt tight, like her heart was grasping onto the memories, begging her to not leave, to not move on. But moving on would mean being stuck, and she didn’t want to feel stuck—she just never wanted to be in one place where the walls would slowly feel like they were closing in on her. She didn’t want to be in one place and eventually hated it, so for that, she had to move on. 
A soft knock was heard from the outside of her bedroom, making Luci turn around hastily. She found Beatrice standing in the doorway, warmly smiling at her daughter, and keeping the tears at bay because she needed the comfort of her mother more than her mother’s tears. 
“My Lucky Star…” Beatrice walked into the room, welcoming Luci into her arms. “You okay?” 
Luci deeply inhaled and exhaled as she calmed herself down from her cries. “I’m alright. It’s just hard saying goodbye to this place—to my room.”’
“Oh, Lulu. You don’t need to say goodbye. I know you’ll be coming back here soon, anyways. I know you love home too much to completely stay away.” Beatrice was subtly trying to remind Luci about her love for her hometown, for her home, but her words also were trying to remind her about that certain love for her home and to never forget that love so she doesn’t stray away because Beatrice was simply afraid Luci would never want to come back once she discovered the luxury of her career. And even though she knew her Lulu wasn’t one to forget about her family, Beatrice would never admit her fear. 
Luci sniffled, wiping her tears away as she pulled away from her mother’s embrace. “Yeah, I know. Just…doesn’t feel real that I’m leaving.” 
“Sure, you’re leaving, but you’re going off to do bigger and better things. You were never one to stay in one place, physically and mentally—you were always moving, always loved learning more. And I’ve always been so intrigued and interested in how your mind works.” 
“Ma…” The waterworks seemed to be the highlight of the move. 
“I’m serious! I’m so genuinely proud of you. You’ve been keeping your talent—and I don’t mean ‘high school plays’ talent. I mean your Broadway, Hollywood, Academy winning talent. Now, you get to showcase your light in front of thousands of people.” Beatrice always had a way of boosting Luci’s self-esteem, making her ego a tad bit more bigger than it already was. She didn’t mind if her self-esteem had skyrocketed into the galaxy of her dreams, but she always reminded Luci that being humble and kind always outweighed being obnoxious and arrogant. “Now, enough with these tears. You’ve got a road trip to New York. C’mon, now.” 
They made their way downstairs and out the door where Ren and Nathan were talking about the latest basketball game of the Celtics. The trunk was closed, and the only thing waiting was Luci herself. 
“There she is! Ready?” 
Luci took a deep breath, turning her head to look back at the pastel yellow house that had kept her safe for the past twenty-five years. From here, she knew everything was going to change. Whether it’d be for the good or if things would go downhill from here? She didn’t know; all she knew was that she was going to be doing what she loved and she was going to have the time of her life doing it. 
“Yeah, I’m ready.” 
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The state of Connecticut seemed to pass by quickly from the car as Nathan drove at a decent seventy miles per hour; the state vanished just as quickly as when they entered. 
Luci mindlessly looked out the window, thinking about everything and nothing at once as she drowned out the music playing through the speakers of the car and Nathan’s voice singing along. 
The cars passing by, the bystanders, and the locals filled the streets and highways, making her wonder what all of these people’s stories were—wondering if they lived in this city or if they were just stopping by to visit, or if they’re just going through the state to get to the one next door just as she was. Maybe she’s had an encounter or simply passed by them on the street in a world that seemed too large but small at the same time. She always pondered on whether everyone else thought the way she thought—if they wondered what her story was or the people around them. 
The world is an interesting place and there were so many intriguing people out there, making her more excited by the minute as she takes on this new adventure in her life that would be completely life changing. Luci’s going to be meeting so many new people that, she would hope, have an impact on her personal life or career. 
“Nervous?” Nathan broke the comfortable silence between them. 
Luci raised her brows and curled her lips into her mouth. “A bit.” 
He nodded, thinking for a moment. Nathan was always one to think before he spoke, and it was a quality that some people needed to learn how to do. He quickly learned that lesson when he was in high school; one of his friends, Johnny, and him were going back and forth joking around with one another. And for some odd reason, teenage boys liked to joke around about fucking everything, so Nathan had said “Yeah, I fucked your mom, what about it?” without thinking. Johnny stayed silent, the rest of their friends were waiting for his comeback, but they only received tears that glossed over his eyes before he ran off to a different part of campus, away from the lunch tables. Nathan found him behind the orchestra building with his face pressed on his kneecaps, crying. Later, he found out that Johnny’s mother had passed away before their sophomore year started and he hadn’t told anyone, which left Nathan quite speechless, but it was a lesson that he learned: to think before anything comes out of his mouth. 
“I know you’ll do great. You were born to do this, born to be on stage. Everything you do is to greater your experience and opportunities. All the mistakes you’re gonna make, which we both know you’re gonna make, they’re gonna be learning lessons for you to continue doing what you’re good at doing; the mistakes are there so you can better yourself,” he reassured, occasionally glancing at you briefly before averting his eyes back onto the highway. 
Luci smiled, never taking her eyes off her older brother. She leaned closer to the middle console, where his right arm was resting on the padded console. Hugging his arm tightly and resting her cheek on his shoulder, she accepted and appreciated his advice, his words. They made her heart fill up with so much gratitude and love, insanely grateful and happy that she had such an amazing and supportive family who always knew the right things to say when they could sense her nerves and anxieties powering through the roof. 
“You’re gonna kill it out there. This is just a step towards where you wanna go, where you actually wanna be.” 
She nodded, looking to her right as they quickly passed the ‘Welcome to New York’ sign from the state line of Connecticut and New York, and it was the sign indicating her new home. 
Nathan pulled into the apartment’s parking garage, entering in with the code that the complex gave Luci on the silver keypad as the two watched the automatic gate arm swing up to the side, and Nathan entered the parking structure, parking in one of the many spaces available. 
Luci excitedly got out of the car, rushing to the trunk where Nathan had opened it from inside the car. Unfortunately, she had forgotten to bring the hand dolly to help carry the boxes, which meant that the siblings were going to have to carry the many boxes she packed by her own hand and strength. But luckily, some of them weren’t that heavy; most of the items in the brown boxes were kitchenware and she figured she could just drag those. 
One by one, they took one box each and headed for the elevator, where it took them to her apartment floor—floor four. Luci grabbed the keys from her purse that contained two copper keys hanging on one single silver loop and a small keyless sensor, and she unlocked her navy blue door, revealing her new apartment. 
When she entered, she was met with a door across the entrance that she would use for her coats and shoes, things that she would need when she’s rushing out the door. Going through the small hallway in from the entrance, it led her to another small hallway to her left where her bedroom and guest bathroom was; and to her right, it would take her to the kitchen and living space. With four big windows with black window frames, the natural light really came in, making her place brighter for saving electricity. 
Walking in and putting the boxes against the black cabinets in the kitchen, she immediately fell in love with the space, her space. Despite already taking a tour of the apartment a few months prior to her official move in day, it felt different being there for the second time because she now knew that this place was hers. She saw it in a different light, and she was already anticipating the memories she was going to make in her new home. The place was empty; and with every step and every noise from her mouth, the room would echo, and she loved it. There was something satisfying about the echo in an empty space that was hers, like she wanted to furnish the hell out of it, but at the same time, she didn’t mind the echo. 
“This is your new home.” Nathan put an arm around Luci’s shoulder. He got a bit emotional seeing his baby sister grow up and move away from home, but he was excited for all of the experiences and memories she was going to make. Luci looked up at him, not saying anything but smiling as she was speechless. Nathan could practically feel the excitement run through her and all he did was chuckle at her speechlessness. “C’mon, let’s go get the rest of the boxes.” 
For the next fifteen minutes, Luci and Nathan hauled the boxes from the car, to the elevator, and down the hallway to her apartment. There were about four more boxes left in the trunk, and they would’ve been finished by now if they hadn’t been taking breaks. 
Nathan’s phone rang as he was sitting on the floor, leaning against the cabinets of the kitchen across from Luci who was sitting in the corner where her dining table would be. 
“Hello?” Answered Nathan. “What? Tonight? I’m in New York. I’m helping my little sister move here. Uh, okay. Sure. Bye.” He groaned, standing up. 
“Who was that?” Luci asked, nosy as she was. 
“That was one of the board members at Mass General Hospital.” Luci’s eyes widened. “They just asked me if I could come in tonight to teach and supervise the new residents.” Nathan was a general doctor working in the Emergency Room as Mass General back in Boston. He’s always wanted to teach with all the knowledge he’s stored in his brain—always wanting someone to learn a thing or two when they spoke to him, and this was his chance. 
“Holy shit, that’s amazing, Nate!” Luci stood up, excited for him.
He started to breathe a bit heavily and Luci immediately took notice; she could practically feel the nerves coming out of him, the same nerves she felt while going in for an audition. “Yeah, I actually have to leave, like, right now.” 
“Hey, hey.” She quickly stopped him from running out of the building and out of his mind. “Come here—breathe with me for a second.” She held onto his wrists gently. 
“Luci, I have to-”
He pulled away, but she tugged him back. “You’re going to drive yourself through the highway, and who knows what will happen, you might get pulled over and you won’t make it to the hospital. So, just take sixty seconds to breathe with me.” 
For the remainder of the time that they had together, they took some deep breaths. She spoke encouraging and uplifting words to him to calm down his nerves and anxieties that he seemed to drive himself over a cliff for, and it seemed to work as Nathan’s shoulder’s weren’t so tense and the grip on her hands had loosened. 
The two of them walked down to the parking garage where Nathan took down the last four boxes and placed them by the entrance of the complex. He was adamant on helping her get the last few boxes up to her apartment, but she shrugged it off, telling him that she was able to carry them and that he needed to leave because he’s most likely going to hit traffic during rush hour. 
“Call me if you need anything, okay? I mean it. I will drive here in a heartbeat.” 
“I will, I will-”
“Just not tonight,” he joked. “This is the highlight of my career.” His smile was so bright that it was like he was a little kid on Christmas again who just received a Hot Speed set from Santa. 
Luci laughed, hugging him goodbye. “And call me if you need anything too. I’ll miss seeing you everyday,” she admitted, a slight frown on her face. She thought she’d have the entire day with Nathan, but it was cut short due to his work but she wasn’t mad about that at all because she knew there'd be plenty of times when he would drive down to walk along the New York streets and see her perform. 
“I’m gonna miss you too, Ana. But I love you and I’ll see you next month!” He hurried into his car, and Luci watched him as he pulled out of the driveway, waving at the rear view mirror to say one last ‘see you later’ to his little sister. 
Walking back to the curb where all of the boxes were set, Luci picked one up to test how heavy it was and she barely made it upright without almost hurting her back, so she put the box down to take a proper breather. She decided to drag the box closer to the door of the complex—which saved her a few steps without completely dropping the box that was labeled ‘glass plates’—and pulled the handle of the door, only to find it completely locked. There was a slight panic that flew through her until she realized that she needed her keyless tag that she had to press against the pad on the wall to get inside the complex, so she blew out a sigh of relief before reaching down to her pocket for her key, and with just her luck, her keys weren’t in her pocket or with her at all. Then she started to panic again. 
Luci quickly walked out of the parking garage and to the front of the building where the leasing office was to find them closed, which was odd because it was Saturday, but apparently their servers were down so they just decided to take the entire day off. She rolled her eyes annoyingly, walking back to the garage in a fast manner because she didn’t want anyone to take her boxes, and so she figured that she could just wait until someone left the complex or arrived. She even left her phone at her place, so it wasn’t like she could call anyone to help her, but some sort of entertainment would help the time go by quicker. 
Sitting on the curb in the garage, pacing back and forth on the sidewalk, and humming the melody from the Miss Saigon soundtrack, an hour goes by until she sees someone walk past the automatic gate barrier, heading towards the entrance where he opened the door with his tag. Luci sprinted towards the door, calling out for help. 
“Wait, wait!” The man turned around confusingly, taking his AirPod out of one ear. She caught up, taking deep breaths as she waved at the man. “Sorry, I’ve been out here for an hour and I completely forgot my key.” He didn’t say anything but stared at her, wondering why he’s never seen this woman before. The apartment complex really only had four floors, and he’s sure that he’s seen everyone who’s lived here. She noticed that he looked down at the boxes and back at her. “Oh, I just moved in.” He nodded more understandingly. “Do you mind holding the door for me?” 
“Sure.” Was the first thing he told her before stepping aside to hold the door. She took another deep breath, getting into the correct form so she doesn’t throw her back out, and began to lift the heavy box. He noticed her struggling, and he felt foolish for not offering his help in the first place when he noticed the four boxes on the cement. “Here, sorry, let me help with that. Get the door, yeah?” Luci’s heart flipped once she heard his deep, accented voice before she gratefully thanked him and he grabbed the box from her, replacing her hands with his and the slightest brush of their fingers made her flustered; he held the box tightly to his chest without much struggle. 
“Yeah, let me just get this one.” Luci grabbed a much lighter box that had all of her shoes, and held the door for him with her foot as he made his way inside of the building and to the elevator. He pressed the button with the arrow pointing up, and luckily, they didn’t have to wait for more than five seconds before the bell at the top chimed and the stainless steel doors opened. 
With the heavy box in his hands, he still let Luci walk in first, which made her smile and he followed in as she pressed with the bold ‘4’ printed on it. He held the box in between his chest and the other end of the bar on the wall as they waited in silence as the elevator lifted them up to her apartment floor, and she brushed past him when he lifted his arm, gesturing her to go first. 
Her front door was closed but it was unlocked, which only made sense, so she opened her door, putting the box next to the entrance and politely asking the man to put it next to the one you put down. 
“Thank you so much, really. You have no idea how much I appreciate your help.��� 
“It’s no problem. I was the same when I moved here too—forgot my keys and was locked out.” He related to make her feel lighter about the situation since it was an honest mishap. 
“Did you go to the leasing office?” She asked curiously. 
“Yeah, but they were closed.” 
“They’re closed today too! It’s like they do that on purpose whenever someone new moves in.” The man chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. 
She hadn’t gotten a proper look at him since she was too distracted by trying to get into her building, but just by one real look at him, he was very attractive—probably too attractive to where she couldn’t think straight. He was wearing a pastel yellow and white striped button down that was a bit flowy and open, showing his white tank underneath that was tucked into his black skinny jeans. His tank top was low enough, exposing a patch of chest hair and his necklace that rested against his skin, in between his swallow tattoos just below his collarbones. Rings hugged his long fingers on both hands as he held two brown paper bags from Trader Joes. He was handsome, that’s for sure, and she felt like she was going to compare his beauty to all the other men that she was going to encounter in the future. 
“They’re not very good at going into work, but if you give them a call then it’s like they’re a 24/7 help center.” 
Luci nodded, chuckling. “Good to know. I’ll keep that in mind.” 
“I’ll help you with the last boxes.” Before she was about to protest and tell him that he didn’t have to help her anymore because she was sure the last ones were light, he made his way towards the elevator and she quickly followed. 
To her surprise, one of the boxes was heavier than the other and she was glad that the man was able to carry it for her. They took the boxes up to her apartment, stacking it on top of the ones that were set down before she thanked him gratefully again. 
“I really appreciate all your help.” She smiled, leaning against the doorframe. 
“Not that I’m doubting your strength or anything, but how were you supposed to get those boxes up to your apartment?” He asked softly, not wanting to offend her by his words. 
“Oh, my brother was supposed to help me, but he had to go back home for an emergency at work.” The man nodded, seeming that was the most acceptable answer, not like he was searching if she was lying. “But thank you for your help. You’re a true lifesaver,” she said with a soft smile on her face. Her tone was a bit flirty than she wanted it to be, but it naturally came out. 
“It’s not a problem. I’ll see you around.” Luci hadn’t closed her door yet, but she found out that he was literally her neighbor on the opposite side of the wall. He didn’t even have to take two steps to get to his place—all he had to do was turn around and he was home. She smiled at the thought of that, glad that her neighbor was already so kind to her. 
As he was fumbling with his keys, he eventually got his door unlocked, and Luci was itching to ask what his name was—maybe make her first friend during her first day living in the big city. The man felt his neighbor's eyes on him, burning through the back of his head, so he turned around at the same time she spoke. 
“Uh, hey,” Luci called out. He was looking over his shoulder, pursing his lips as he raised his brows. “I was wondering if…you’d like to have dinner with me tonight? Y’know, to thank you for all your help and practically saving me while I was stranded.” She chuckled, playing with the tips of her fingers as she looked at him with hope. 
He thought the invitation was nice, but…“It’s okay, really. I, uh, have plans already tonight,” he admitted honestly because he doesn’t make a habit of being dishonest. 
Luci had some thick skin—she grew it throughout the years, and she had always been pretty confident. So many people would think that she could handle rejection well because she’s auditioned for many roles in her lifetime, and had been rejected for most of those roles. But the rejection that her neighbor handed to her so respectfully and politely was one that hit her the most, and she didn't know why. 
Curling her lips into her mouth as she felt the pang of her heart sinking into her chest, she nodded and placed a small smile onto her face. 
“Have fun tonight, then. I’ll see you around.” She grinned, hiding the slight bit of pain that she felt. He nodded, walking inside his apartment as she was in her doorway as well. “Oh, I’m Luci, by the way.” She introduced herself, feeling like she should have done that ten minutes ago, but it had slipped her mind. 
The corner of the man’s mouth turned up into a sly smirk, and she nearly felt herself fall as she gripped the door handle tightly. It was enough to make the pain in her chest disappear, and all thoughts of the rejection that she would think about for the rest of the night vanished. 
“Nice to meet you, Luci. I’m Harry.” 
With that, Harry closed his door, putting a barrier between him and Luci, who was still standing in her doorway. She let out the longest sigh of her life, feeling like she’d been constricting herself from breathing properly for the last ten minutes. 
Luci closed her door and leaned against it, looking down at the boxes that were resting by her feet. She softly smiled, her cheeks were starting to get warm, and she was fully aware that Harry was the cause of it.
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come talk to me about your thoughts and feelings! hope you all enjoyed the first chapter, thank you for reading <3 
ty to @sunflowers-styles​ for beta reading!
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irgmugurg · 3 years
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Belphie's Music Taste
Mammon's Music Taste
Asmodeus's Music Taste
Belphie listening to lofi songs is simultaneously the cutest and funniest thing that I’ve ever heard.
Aw is the bratty little cowboy gonna listen to windchimes and sparkles. Yes. Yes, he is.
Aight hear me out. JUST LISTEN
Belphie listening to country music.
HE HAS THE COWBOY AESTHETIC ALREADY MIGHT AS WELL GO ALL THE WAY.
He’d start it as a joke but he’d gradually love falling asleep to the slow drawl of the music.
he thinks their super cheesy but proceeds to press play
"ugh more country music?" *clicks play*
Or even listening to those sad country army songs about being soldiers and missing your family
He 100% relates these songs to Lilith and having to fight for/against the celestial realm.
AT SOME POINT he’s layed with Beel and they both cried about country music/Lilith (think If Your Reading This and a bunch more by Tim McGraw, Arlington, and Your Gonna Miss This by Trace Adkins)
Butterfly Kisses by Bob Carlise. FUCK. I’M GOING TO CRY.
I know some of these songs are from the point of view of a daughter and their dad but Belphie can’t help but think of being able to grow up and show Lilith how the world has changed.
Doesn’t even care that most of country songs are religion-based and yeah sometimes he gets so angry at Father for what he took from him but he remembers that now Lilith is up there still. Doesn’t make it hurt any less though.
Wishes he could still hold her, see her grow up, him and beel being her best men at her wedding, connecting the human and celestial realm
listens to circus songs and fucking cries
NICKELBACK. (he isn’t THAT bad okay, sometimes his songs SLAP) ((lullaby,,,belphie relates this song to his feelings of overwhelming anger in the attic)
Falling asleep holding each others hands, reminiscing about Lilith and the times they had together.
Mammon and satan, just to piss him off, played the wild west theme songs (The Good The Bad The Ugly theme) whenever he walked in a room and he would go demon mode (only for them to laugh harder, cowboy looking ass)
gets embarrassed if you hear him listening to country music
changes the song quickly, he can't have people knowing he genuinely likes it
listened to If I Die Young once and thought of Lilith
proceeded to block all mentions of this song
Anyway LOFI MUSIC.
He loves how soft and sweet it is even though it doesn’t match his “style”.
This motherfucker can be berated by Lucifer and he’ll put on headphones and just watch Lucifer scream at him and only hear soft Lofi music.
Lofi hip hop, Jazz, pop. He does not discriminate.
Very often gets the beats and small portions of the lyrics stuck in his head.
LOVES Shiloh Dynasty and all the remixes
But that is not the only thing that Belphie listens to. Oh no, definitely not.
Loves nightcore. Alvin and the Chipmunks who?
Alternatively likes listening to slowed down songs
Listens to the front bottoms and thinks about punching lucifer in his face
OUCH! By Matt Watson
HE LISTENS TO SCREAMO AND EMO MUSIC.
MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE, SLEEPING WITH SIRENS, PIERCE THE VEIL.
Emo headass.
Is very much stuck in the 2010s (probably the last era he was able to listen to before getting locked in the attic and since getting out has been stuck there) and if MC introduces him to any more then even 2020 music.
It’s the emotions that he relates so heavily to but it also helps him stay awake to do tasks.
His turn to do dishes? Unearthly screaming comes from the kitchen. Please don’t worry he is just vibing.
He has the screamo voice. He doesn’t use it often because I don’t see Belphie as someone to sing along, more bopping to the music and swaying, MAYBE mumbling under his breath but nothing more.
Will do it with Lucifer around just to fuck with him
Why is the thought of Belphie on stage, smudged mascara, black leather clothes and screaming on the top of his lungs hot????
would 100% let you dress him up in that outfit but acts like he doesn't like it
Stop *bonk* being *bonk* a *bonk* belphie *bonk* simp *bonk*
He doesn’t like making playlists because its so much work so if he puts on Lofi to go to sleep to and he will stay sleeping on wild screamo music.
Listens to it most in the attic because that’s where a FUCKTON of his resentment/rebellious vibes come from and because he doesn’t want to bother Beel while they are sleeping.
Asshole probably doesn’t use his headphones anywhere else tho.
Asmodeus and Mammon don’t understand him but they love him nonetheless.
*demonic screeching* “Okay sweetie don’t forget about the student council meeting later today <3”
If Mammon vibes with a song he WILL scream along, incoherently though because he doesn’t know the lyrics.
Beel just kinda sits there. Doesn’t get it either but loves seeing Belphie look so at peace.
Old man lucifer “is that what you kids listen to today?” (but can he talk?? really?? listening to cursed records bc iTs InTeReStInG)
Satan gets it the most out of anyone else. When they have Anti Lucifer-League meetings Belphegor puts on the most rebellious, and relatable (for their cause) at least, songs and they both scream the lyrics.
he isn't shy showing these songs to you but has once attempted to show off his emo scream please don't laugh at him
OKAY BUT CLEANING UP THE LIVING ROOM WITH BELPHIE WHILE YOU BOTH SCREAM IS SO CUTE
Trophy Father’s Son by Sleeping With Sirens, Can You Feel My Heart, Keep Myself Alive, Sleepwalking by Bring Me The Horizon, Last Resort by Papa Roach, A LOT OF LINKIN PARK, Monster by Skillet, and OF COURSE Bring Me To Life by Evanescence
He probably wouldn't listen to wolf in sheeps clothing but *pointing* THATS HIM
Belphie has spent time crying over these songs. On late nights when he can’t sleep he cries about how he thinks Lucifer doesn’t love him and blames him for Lilith’s death. How MC must really hate him for how he’s acted. How different he is from his brother’s. (part of why he won’t listen to it in front of Beel)
please hold him and promise him that you don't hate him
He also LOOOOOVVES classical music but due to his history with it will not listen to it.
Aka how he used to lay on lucifer’s lap while he plays lullabies for him.
If Lucifer is playing classical music in the area tho? He can’t help but suddenly feel really sleepy. And no he didn’t fall asleep close enough to hear Lucifer scribble away on his paperwork (Lucifer knows he does and always has a blanket ready for when this happens).
lay with him and if you listen very carefully you can hear him mumbling the lyrics under his breath as he runs his fingers through your hair
One of my biggest things about belphie is that he is really smart even though he doesn’t like to put in the effort.
He likes to dissect these songs (typically passing thoughts and really paying attention, he won’t put to much effort into it) and get into them and it backfires because that means he’s really listening to these lyrics and it hits him THAT much harder. (STICKING LITTLE WHITE FLOWERS ALL UP IN HER HAAAAAIIRRRR)
End Note: Belphie doesn't have the largest music selection but the songs he listen to either help him sleep or makes him get all up in his feelings (bc he is emotionally stunted and its the only way he can cry).
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haemosexuality · 3 years
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little nightmares/mostly six headcannons
-the kids almost never talk. like, they can, but every little noise can mean death and theyre just not used to it. their norm is communicating nonverbally and just going along with whatever the other is doing cause they trust each other. their speech is also kind of broken
-even when they do talk six is very quiet, mono does all the talking and six often just ignores his questions lol. shes not doing it to be rude tho, she never had that many human interactions much less conversations, she doesnt know how they work (ive seen a lot of ppl hc her as selectively mute and i like that but im not 100% sure how that works, i have to read more about it)
- the way i see the world of ln is that it's a world where who knows how many years ago it was normal, just like ours, but a bunch of different magical events/entities/forces started messing with it and it became how it is now. theres a lot of other weird places besides what we see in the game. and in the comics its kinda said that these magical things mess with your memories too, if you dont talk about them, you forget them
-we see in the game that six is kinda feral and behaves like an animal sometimes, so i headcannon that whatever magical thing happened to the place she's from, happened when she was very young. she spent most of her life alone, teaching herself how to live, and is not very socialized
-mono has way more like experience with socialization and human communities etc than six, only being really affected by the magic stuff for the last couple of years, but between the fading memories and time loop paradox thing, he doesnt remember any of it
-neither of them can write tho mono knows how to read
-six is very playfull and, when shes relaxed, loves playing pranks on mono. she also loves drawing
-this is kinda based on how players always make mono to be a uwu soft boy pacifist and six a genocidal blood thirsty monster, even tho on the game mono kills more people than six, but when six does something creepy mono is like "six, what the heck, youre terrible" while six is "???? wha???didnt you just kill 3 people 5 minutes ago????"
-six is like terrified of monos powers. this is kinda canon because after she pulls him out of the tv she does seem to be scared and pushes herself away from him, but still, i wanted to include it here bc i dont see many ppl talking about it. she mostly just ignores it tho cause she trusts him
-while the game itself only lasts a couple of hours i like to think mono and six actually travelled together for like 1 or 2 months and the game is just a tldr version of that, only rlly showing the important parts lmao. but they did a lot of walking climbing eating  sleeping bonding etc
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would it be enough?
okay this isn’t edited or anything, but! here’s a little ficlet i started a few months ago and got the inspiration to finish. 
title from & inspired by “peace” by tsweezy (that song makes me cry every time bc i feel like i’m never gonna get my happily ever after lol, so i had to give peter his)
word count: 1.6k
warnings: depression, happy ending, borderline personality disorder, domesticity, discussions of mental health issues
It’s dark in the bathroom. The only light is coming in from the frosted window over the bathtub, scattered beams pouring through the glass of the shower. There are two bodies underneath the rainfall showerhead, wrapped up in each other. 
The taller of the two men pulls away slightly, reaching for a non-descript bottle of shampoo. He squeezes some into his hand, while his partner pumps a blob of body wash on a loofah. Their actions are like a choreographed dance as the smaller of the two tilts his head into the other’s skilled fingers, his own hand moving to lather at the sculpted chest in front of him. 
Peter sighs at the feeling of Tony’s nails scratching at his scalp. He loves moments like this; where it’s just the two of them enjoying each other’s company, forgetting the world outside of the little bubble of peace they’ve created. Running the loofah across the older man’s shoulder and down his bicep, he watches the way the shadows and light drift over the skin. Carefully, he presses the pad of his thumb to the pale, mottled scar tissue covering the center of Tony’s chest where the reactor used to sit, rubbing gentle circles into the skin. It’s smooth to the touch, bare of the greying curls that are smattered from his pecs all the way down to the ‘v’ of his hips. 
He loves this body- its strength, the way it makes him feel protected, the things it can do to his own. Looking up into Tony’s eyes, he thinks of how much he loves the man it belongs to. “I love you,” he says softly, puckering his lips as he’s maneuvered so that his head is under the water once more. 
“I love you more,” Tony replies automatically. “Close your eyes, Pete.” His hands tilt Peter’s head back and he runs his fingers through the foam saturated curls. Once the front is rinsed, he opens his mouth again, “‘kay you can open now.” He takes his time washing all of the remaining suds out as the younger man continues to run the sudsy netting over his skin. 
Next is the apricot scented conditioner that Peter loves. He applies a handful to the dripping auburn locks and rubs the excess into his own salt and pepper hair. Then Tony clocks the way his boyfriend is grinning goofily up at him. It brings a smile to his face as well. “What’s so funny, why’re you smiling at me like that, Pete?”
Peter’s eyes shine as they meet the older man’s. “You’ve got soap on your nose.” He hands Tony the loofah and runs his fingers under the water so that he can reach up to wipe the white foam from the other’s face. “Got it,” he says softly, letting out a quiet sigh as Tony rubs the sudsy loofah over his shoulders. 
Moments like this, as peaceful as they are, are nothing if not effervescent. Even as he stands there under the warm spray, Peter can feel the chill settling deep in his bones and beginning to weigh him down. There’s a knot forming in his chest. He takes a deep breath and tries not to focus on it. He takes in the smell of their bath products, the feel of his big toe bumping against the inside of Tony’s foot. He listens to the sounds of their breathing, the water swirling down the drain. If he ignores the feeling it will go away. 
It doesn’t quite work, and Tony makes a soft questioning sound in the back of his throat and pulls the shorter man a little closer as he rubs the soapy netting in soft circles over the expanse of his back.
Peter lets his forehead rest on Tony’s collar bone. His chest feels- tight. He takes a slow, shuddering breath and tries to calm himself down. He’s starting to get restless, that weird fizzly feeling thrumming in his muscles. “It won’t always be like this, Tony,” he mutters, self-deprecatingly. His arms wrap around his partner’s waist in an attempt to comfort himself. “I’m...I have bad days. So bad sometimes…” He succumbs to the lump in his throat and lets his voice trail off at the end in an attempt to keep it from breaking. His eyes start to burn. He doesn’t mention that he can almost feel one coming on now- 
How did he go from being perfectly happy to feeling like he’s falling apart in the span of a few minutes? It never fails to make him feel ridiculous, how sensitive he is to his own thoughts. If only he could control it, if only he wasn’t so-
Another gentle noise from Tony, who presses a kiss to the shell of his ear. “I know. I love you every day, Peter. Not just when you’re having a good day.” 
Peter lets out a frustrated noise, followed by a shaky sigh. “But...you’re so good, Tony. You’re, you’re normal, and… And I- I’m never gonna be that, I won’t ever really, truly know what that’s like.” And he won’t. Because even on the good days, he’s always aware that it won’t last. Just like the current situation. “There are days where all I can manage is sitting in front of the TV, wrapped in a blanket.” His voice breaks, and the tears that had been stinging at his eyes begin to fall in earnest. “I’ll- I’ll go days without showering because I can’t bring myself to get up long enough to take one, and I’ll put it off until I literally can’t stand it anymore because I stink so bad.” A  soft sob rips its way up from his lungs, his whole body shaking with the force of it. Fuck-
Tony just rinses him off under the water, eyes full of compassion as he wraps his arms around him. “It’s alright baby, I’m listening. I’m here.”
The young man splutters, gasping as he starts up again, voice quiet. “I’ll split on you, there will be days where I’ll forget how much I love you, forget all the good stuff. Even though I know, Tony I know how much you love me, I do, but there will be days where I’ll swear that you don’t, that you never did.” 
He’s not sure why he’s saying all of this. Maybe because they haven’t actually had this conversation. Tony knows about his mental illness, of course, but honestly, Peter had been content to let him do his own research about his condition and what that would mean for them. What he would have to deal with every day for the rest of their lives. He hadn’t wanted the words to come out of his own mouth. He refused to be the catalyst that would force him to watch the love of his life realize that he wasn’t good enough, that he was too reactive, too sensitive. That he was just- too much. In every way. 
Too late for that now.
“I know, baby. Peter, I know all of that. I’m not going anywhere. You being borderline didn’t scare me before we got together, and it doesn’t scare me now.”
And something about that rubs Peter the wrong way. He wants to scream. “But it should, Tony! We’re talking about moving in together and you... You shouldn’t have to deal with my- With my crazy.” He cuts himself off and bites at his wobbling lower lip when he notices the way Tony is looking at him. He looks- hurt, almost. “What?”
Tony’s voice is low. “Don’t you ever call yourself crazy. You’re not crazy. You know what you are? You’re my boyfriend. You’re the most generous person I’ve ever met. You give the most amazing snuggles. You’re sensitive and extremely empathetic, and you always know the right thing to say. You’re helpful. You’re expressive, and in touch with your emotions, which can’t be said about most people. You are beautiful Peter, and so is this brain of yours and everything that comes with it. I wouldn’t change you for the world, okay?” 
He pauses to press their mouths together and looks down at Peter, who stopped crying during his little speech and is now gazing at him with adoration in his eyes. “And baby, I know we aren’t married yet but I mean it- for better or worse, through sickness and in health. Or, uh,” he trails off, suddenly looking a bit shy. “However it goes. You know what I mean.”
Peter blinks up at him, heart fluttering in his chest. He’s disoriented by the sudden surge of serotonin flooding his system. This is exactly what he means, but- “You- You wanna marry me?” A shaky smile takes over his lips at the thought. Forever with Tony. 
Tony chuckles. “Of course I do. Who else is gonna put up with me?” He presses another kiss to Peter’s forehead before dragging him under the water. “Let’s wash this conditioner out, put on some comfy jammies- Ah, yes I know we just woke up- and lay in bed today, hmm? I’ll be big spoon.”
The younger man grins, squeezing his eyes shut as the water cascades down his face. “Sounds like a good deal to me- Hey wait.” He cracks an eye open and squints at Tony. “That wasn’t you proposing, right? Because I think I deserve-”
An affronted noise leaves Tony’s mouth. “You can wash out your own damn conditioner! Who do you take me for? Of course that wasn’t a real proposal- I have standards!”
Peter just laughs as the man’s fingers don’t move from their place in his hair.
That knot is still in his chest but-
The good moments, like this? They’re enough to make everything else worth it.
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ushiwakaout · 4 years
Note
I love your ehat the haikyuu boys would say! Could I please please please request that for Akaashi or Sugawara? You write them so well, I'm literally in love!
I’ll be making two separate ones! I keep thinking that i’m done w this series but y’all keep wanting more 😤  (not that i’m complaining or anything because it keeps me busy)
and thank you 😭 i’m trying really hard to depict the characters well but i feel like i’m just repeating every single one.
Let’s do Suga first (Slight age difference, Suga 27/You 24 || ya’ll have been dating for two years)
“Hey bug- it’s time to get up.” (6:00 am)
*If you don’t wake up he will pull the blankets off you... naked or not*
“Rise and shine bug!!!” very chaotic... very mean.
“What do you mean you don’t wanna get up... To bad, breakfast is getting cold.”
“I woke you up early because I wanted a head start on our day off, thats why.”
“Coffee or tea?”
“I love you too bug.” 
*forehead kiss*
*will open every single curtain so sunlight can rain into your place... also does it because he loves seeing your skin glow under the sunlight*
“What do you want to do on our day off?”
*he’s a elementary teacher and you’re a college student*
“I was thinking we could maybe....” 
*pulls you into a kiss mid sentence, wrapping his fingers with yours*
“...spend the day at the park, have a picnic like our first date... What do you think?”
*your putty in his hands when he does this every morning. there isn’t a morning that he doesn’t do it*
“What’s on your mind bug?” (6:30 am)
*flash back to last night when he was giving you aftercare, hovering over you lightly as he strokes your face and he says those exact words*
*you tell him and he his brain STOPS WORKING... he’s like Oh? he’s blushing so hard it so cute*
“BUG YOU CAN’T SAY THOSE THINGS TO ME SO EARLY IN THE MORNING”
“WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT TO ME?!”
“YOU’RE SO SWEET” *cups your cheeks and kisses your face all around* “What did I do to deserve you?”
“Come on lets sit down and eat breakfast”
*he honestly has a tendancy of asking random questions like*
“Where do ducks come from?”
“Do you think Hinata is having fun in brazil?”
“You think he packed enough sun screen?”
“Should I ask him?”
“I think I’ll call him.” (7:00 am)
*he legit be on the phone with him for hours on end until your ready*
*he walks around the house, sits on the couch, gets up from the couch, makes the bed, watches you in the shower for a bit before smiling and whistling away to the patio*
“You ready yet?”(9:10 am)
“Let’s go then... What do you wanna get first?”
“I kinda want some boba tea...”
“You think they have any discounts since we’re a couple?”
“What? It’s just an extra bonus with being with you.”
“You cannot tell me that you don’t enjoy couples discounts.”
“I am not an old lady! I just like saving my money.”
“Shush woman, hold my head and order me something you think i might like.”
You: “You always get the same thing Koushi.”
“Exactly.” (10:00 am)
*he def pats your butt every time he makes you order something for him*
*one of his students has def seen him do it in public but they’ve never said anything*
*sometimes a student runs up to him and hugs him. makes you want to have kids*
*he introduces you to his kid and you just look at him with awe*
“What’s on your mind, bug?”
*he 100% did that on purpose, and now you’re blushing madly*
“What?” 
*you hit his arm and quickly walk away from him, he’s jogging to catch up and when he does, he quickly holds you hand again*
“What do you want for lunch?” (12:00 pm)
“I think you know what I want.”
“It’s the only thing I eat, what are you expecting?”
you: “I don’t know how you haven’t burned a hole in your stomach yet.”
“Just because i order my mapo tofu super spicy doesn’t mean... it’s super spicy.”
you: “Kouchi... I can barely eat a bite before crying...”
“It’s not spicy.”
“You’re just a baby.” 
*kissing the back of your hand*
*non stop teasing bc you can’t handle spicy food the way he can*
*you guys stop at a shop because both of you forgot to bring a damn basket for the fucking picnic*
“How did we forget a basket? How many baskets do we have now because we’ve forgotten ours?” (12:30)
“I like this one... Do you like this one? I think it matches my hair.”
“This one matches your eyes.... This one- Nope, were getting this one.”
“Okay! Now, lunch!”
“I’ll go get you your food and you get mine, yeah?”
*he pulls you into a soft kiss and just smiles at you*
*HES SO IN LOVE WITH YOU EVERYONE AROUND CAN NOTICE*
*when you come back with his favorite food and a little extra, he get’s excited*
“You brought me sweets?! I brought you some too! Wha’cha get?” (1:30 pm)
*When you pick a spot to sit down, he just wants to kiss you all over. hes the sweetest man you’ll ever meet*
*It’s probably three hours into the picnic and his man FALLS ASLEEP ON YOU. He’s so tired from taking care of young children that just listening to you talk to him so softly and so easily when he was on your lap- it drifted him off to sleep*
you: “Koushi... bub? Wake up... I’m getting hungry again.” (6:30 pm)
*he has the sweetest giggle when he hears your voice*
“Have I told you- HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU?!”
*so much energy when he wakes up- its crazy.*
you: “Kou- you need to be more quiet.”
“No... I LOVE YOU- I LOVE you so so much.”
*starts kissing you everywhere and pins you to the ground*
“I love you so much... and one of these days I am going to make you my wife... and you’ll never know the day.”
*he loves saying stuff like that because it gets in your head all day. little do you know HES LEGIT BEEN CARRYING HIS GRANDMOTHERS OLD RING IN HIS POCKET EVERY DAY FOR THE PAST TWO YEARS BECAUSE HE HASN’T FOUND THE RIGHT MOMENT*
“Come on, let’s go find a restaurant of your choosing.”
*doesn’t let go of your hand until you reach the restaurant table, and then grabs your hand over the table*
“Your hand would look so pretty with a ring on it.” (7:30)
you: “stop joking! you’re awful.”
*he just smiles at you and really just says fuck it*
“Who says i’m joking, bug.”
*under the table he’s taking out the ring from the box and then slowly puts it on your ring finger*
you: “kou-”
“I’ve been holding on to this for about... two years now? What do you say?” 
you: “I still think you joking... You’re not, right?”
*he let out a light laugh and shook his head*
“No i’m not...”
*you quickly nod your head and lean over the table to hug him*
“I promise you give you a happy future...”
tags(s): @foggycashdreampainter
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dykesbat · 3 years
Text
okok songs from my bruce playlist + reasons
first love / late spring by mitski
“and I was so young when I behaved twenty-five / Yet now I find I’ve grown into a tall child… Please hurry, leave me, I can’t breathe / Please don’t say you love me / Mune ga hachikire-sōde”
pretty self-explanatory! bruce is emotionally immature and just. yeah i feel like he oftentimes does feel the same as he did in that alleyway yknow. maybe he’s realizing the depths of how immature he is right here in the moment of recognizing that the person he finds himself loving right now is also someone he could potentially lose. i think of bruce as someone who loves a lot. maybe here he’s acknowledging how the price of loving is the possibility of pain.
everybody lost somebody by bleachers
THIS ENTIRE SONG BROOOOOOO
“It’s this dream I keep having where I’m begging / Just to give myself a break / But there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to wake up and remember it / I wanna wake up and remember”
Bruce being an avid dreamer is a pretty popular concept n idk I think the concept of his dreams diverging from the nightmares of his loss to a dream of him acknowledging that he’s mourning and wanting the world to stop or like. him having a nightmare where the only coherent words he remembers after waking up is just his internal “i’m so tired” but maybe its survivors guilt maybe its just the desperation to hold on to whatever he can of the people that he lost maybe he's just trying to hold on to all the good and the good memories are just. so intertwined with the pain of loss. but he doesn’t want to let go of it
“I think pain is waiting alone at the corner / Tryna get myself back home, yeah / Looking like everybody / Knowing everybody lost somebody... A reason I see myself in a million faces / A reason I can't stop it all from changing / So come on, motherf*^&r, you survive”
i think these lines can be used to represent him turning his pain into his efforts for making gotham better. basically just. redirecting the love into the city and the people rather than only mourning. obv it would be his entire mission after his parent’s deaths. and for canon continuity reasons—since it's a bit more hopeful maybe it's after jason’s death and after tim comes around? idk i imagine bruce remembering his parents and remember jason around the manor hallways and on the city rooftops. the whole “trying to get myself back home” can be like home = the person lost or just. literally bruce trying to put in the effort to dragging himself back home for (himself? tim? alfred? hmm.) n the other lines are just. him seeing himself in gotham and seeing worth in human life. it connects to his compassion and his no-kill-rule and his empathy and his taking in of his children. and like yeah he can’t stop it all from changing he can't prevent every death but he’ll try to. the survive line is also pretty self-explanatory. 
garden song by phoebe bridges
“I don't know when you got taller / See our reflection in the water / Off a bridge at the Huntington / I hopped the fence when I was seventeen / Then I knew what I wanted”
ok so I'm thinking. him talking abt dick in the first few lines. probably after reconciling with him after they've been enstranged for so long and he’s feeling regretful for the mistakes he made there while thinking of their past times together.  maybe he took younger dick to a place he went to when he solidified his plan to train abroad? 
“And it’s gonna be just like my recurring dream / I’m at the movies, I don’t remember what I’m seeing / The screen turns into a tidal wave”
do I have to explain.. avid dreamer bruce,, the movies,, the dream ending terribly,, gn!
“I don’t know how, but I’m taller / It must be something in the water / Everything’s growing in our garden / You don’t have to know that it’s haunted”
idk how to explain it? but just. bruce growing up in a manor that suddenly feels larger than it ever did before. n it feels like he took his parents ghosts w him and left whatever his childhood was back in that alley. and part of him can pick out what he felt on that day. and so much changed and he’s grown? he’s grown older than his father ever was? and he doesn’t know how that's possible?
class of 2013 by mitski
“Mom, can you wash my back / This once, and then we can forget / And I’ll leave what im chasing / For the other girls to pursue…. Mom am I still young / Can I dream for a few months more” 
ok no he is not financially struggling n i will b honest this is a self-indulgent song to maximize relatability <3 but my decision to put this song was also based on the idea of him just. missing him mom so muchhhh?? maybe a dream? maybe the aftermath of fear gas? who knows but here the “forget” will just be for his parent's deaths. I imagine this to be somewhat akin to the mask of phantasm monologue he has at his parents grave. (spoilers for that: he’s basically asking his parents for forgiveness for potentially abandoning his oath of bettering Gotham as Batman). last line makes me #$%^&*( just. hnnnnnnn imagine him waking up blurry eyed and brain fogged and he’s just grasping onto the false belief of his parents still being there n clinging on to the comfort of his pre-crime alley childhood before he truly wakes up. 
 sick of losing soulmates by dodie
okok this is on my bruce + romance playlist too bc it reminded me of batcat and bruharvey. it can also be interpreted as his fam ig? but I feel like that doesn’t apply for most of the song.
“God knows what I would be if you hadn’t found me / Sitting all alone in the dark… What the hell would I be without you / Brave face talk so lightly, hide the truth… Cause I’m sick of losing soulmates / So where do we begin / I can finally see you’re as f$:$:&ed up as me / So how do we win”
 I just think. that. Bruce would have abandonment issues. first four lines can be taken for all three (batcat, bruharv, the family) interpretations. the truth being hidden doubling both as his identity as Batman and just. the fact that he loves them lol (batcat, bruharv). last three lines lean towards bc and bh but personally they reminded me more of bat cat (probably bc ppl always say they’re so similar). basically I feel like this song could signify their fears of losing each other in whatever way that means (romantically, platonically, death) bc they both care for each other so much and impact each other so muchhsuagdj but at the same time it feels like its bound to end badly. (ofc it doesn't. whether or not they like. break up from a romance or have a falling out between friends i’d like to think some time after they heal they become reconnect n their relationship w each other is stronger and so alike what it was before but different bc its just. so much healthier this time. and to copy and paste from my thoughts on my other playlist: bruce crashes at selinas house sometimes and she makes the him catsit for her bc she thinks it’s funny when he complains abt her cats and calls them mean names and then gets a picture of bruce knocked out cuddling them like 30 m later courtesy alfred)
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poutybinz · 4 years
Note
We got the fluff, we got the smut, now let's get the ANGST 🙂🙂 how will the boys react to their s/o dumping them hahahaha sorry I live for angst
me too lowkey muahaha
yeonjun
“break up? what do you mean break up?”
you would literally see the joy drain from his face like
his entire world just came crashing down around him and all he wants to know is why
and even if you give him an answer, it’s not gonna make any sense to him
nothings gonna make sense, why can’t you both just work it out?
he’s frustrated and devastated and he doesn’t know who to blame and how to process this
what hurts the most about yeonjun is that he’s definitely the type to hug you and not let go in this situation
yeonjun’s lowkey toxic trait is thinking that sex can fix everything (post breakup sex is definitely a thing and it’s painful)
he attaches to you, he’s kissing at your neck and you have to push him away because that’s the last thing either of you need
but he just clings to you, hugging you tightly with his head buried in the crook of your neck
and that’s when he starts crying, when the realization that it’s really over starts to hit
he wants to kiss you, he wants to hug you
he wants you to tell him this is some stupid joke so he can order food and you can have your movie nights like you always do
the denial stage lasts really long tho, there are some days he wakes up and forgets that you’re broken up and he calls you
and when you either don’t answer or you answer and you have to remind him it’s that same heartbreak all over again
he really cannot let you go, no matter how hard he tries he just can’t
soobin
one half of the crybabies
bc he will cry and he will cry a lot
first, it’s shock. he’s stunned, and then he’s confused.
then when you explain yourself he’s filled with overwhelming disappointment because he didn’t do right by you
maybe he got comfortable and didn’t think about it enough
but the simple fact that you feel like you aren’t loved, that you aren’t the center of his universe is enough to break him completely
he doesn’t blame you at all, he blames himself and that hurts you because you don’t want him to think he wasn’t an amazing boyfriend
sometimes things just don’t work out the way you want them to
it’s a little toxic but he hates himself dearly for letting you go. for not loving you the way he should have. he hates himself a lot
thing is though, soobin wont argue with you.
as much as he loves you and he doesn’t want you to leave him, if you feel unhappy he’s not gonna keep you
so there would be a moment where maybe he’d ask for one last hug and kiss
and in that moment in each other’s embrace, both of you would burst into tears
and all soobin can do is whisper “i love you” over and over again because of course he does
he always will, no matter what
beomgyu
similar to yeonjun, there’s a lot of disbelief
“what are you talking about? you’re joking, right?”
he kind of skips over the sadness bit (or at least it comes later) and he goes straight into anger
he’s so devastated and so heartbroken he just lashes out
“why did you tell me all those things if they weren’t true?! why would you lie to me for all of this time if you were going to leave?!”
he’s irrational at this point and no matter how many times you try to explain that you hadn’t had some sort of plan to get him attached to you and then leave
and that sometimes things just don’t work out
it’s going through one ear and out the other, he might even start throwing things and it might turn into an argument
but once all of the anger wears off he’s left with sadness
he just plops onto the floor or the couch or wherever and he just cries and cries
he doesn’t at first but he lets you come sit and cry with him
you have a moment where you can talk things out, you can try to explain to him where you’re coming from
and that you’ll always have love for him
he understands but that doesn’t mean he isn’t still gonna miss you
he hates watching you leave though he’s trying to be strong but it just hurts too much
taehyun
the worst thing about this would be the complete lack of emotion
because if there’s anything taehyun’s good at, it’s composing himself. he can put on a front if he really wants to.
so when you say “i think we should break up”, he doesn’t respond at all
he just stares blankly at you, but even then you can tell he’s panicking. you can almost see the spurs turning in his head
but instead he just stares at you and nods slowly. he doesn’t ask questions, he doesn’t push the subject any further.
but he’s hurting inside. he’s screaming and he’s begging, his hands are balled into fists and he’s very clearly holding back a lot
and you know him so you call him out on it, you’re trying to get him to open up because you don’t wanna end this on bad terms
he just shakes his head, though. likely to walk away from you completely because he’s not gonna cry in front of you.
mumbles a small “thank you for everything” before leaving
and he’s a pure wreck for days, nearly weeks after
of everyone he’s the quickest to delete your phone contact (to rip the bandaid off) but on his worst nights he cries himself to sleep watching videos of you two that he can’t stir up the courage to delete
hueningkai
the second member of the crybaby team
so no this is gonna suck a lot
because you’ve damn near never seen hyuka upset in any way. his two emotions are :D and :) he’s always a bundle of joy
so when you break the news to him, similar to yeonjun, you see his whole world collapse in his eyes
his eyes start watering and his lip starts quivering
“what did i do wrong? can i try to fix it?”
what hurts the most about hyuka is that he’s really gonna try anything and everything to get you to stay with him
he’s offering up everything, he’s swearing he’ll give you the moon and stars if that’s what you want
and when none of that works, he’s practically sobbing and he’s still begging
and seeing him like that with big fat tears streaming down his face pleading for you, its too much
young love is a son of a bitch :/
he pretty much never comes to terms with it, no matter how hard you try to explain it to him.
you give him one final hug and god he clings to you for dear life
“please don’t go, i’m sorry. i can fix it.”
there’s no easy way to leave the dorms so you have to just untangle yourself from him and go and the poor boy just wails for you
of all of them he struggles the hardest with this. still has you saved as “love of my life 💗🌈✨” in his phone, refuses to get rid of any the pictures you took together
occasionally still texts you whenever soemthing big happens in his life to tell you he’s thinking of you :(
texted you when they won their first big award and it was a bittersweet feeling when you responded with “congratulations, huening” instead of the usual slew of pet names you gave him
yeah he’s still hurting
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ofmermaidstories · 3 years
Note
I really like your blog because you have this really life loving vibe, the type of people that see all the beauty in the world and stuff, so I wanted to ask you for some advice, if that's ok. By nature I'm also like that, kinda mushy, very heartfelt, but a lot of mistreatment from people in my life made me also very cynical, judgy and distrusting. How do you manage to keep this wonderous mentality about life?
In the afternoon, I like to stretch out on my bed, amid my pillows and my blankets, and soak in the late light and the autumn chill. I follow a grocer on instagram in a city three hours away from me because they post pictures of the produce they sell: pumpkins cut in half, jewel-bright tomatoes held in someone’s hands, sourdough loaves made by a neighbour. On the weekends they offer bouquets of flowers, supplied to them by a woman who bills herself as “a weekend florist and full-time mother” — this weekend it’s red berries and sunflowers, bundled up like babies being brought home from the hospital.
On Sunday it’ll be Mother’s Day: I’ll be spending the day deep cleaning the house and ignoring instagram and facebook (mostly bc they’re boring tho, let’s be real).
I live a two-hour car drive from anyone I remotely socialise with who isn’t the cashier at the supermarket I go to. Sometimes, I get so mad that I have to force myself to mentally and physically shut down, like, complete black-screen mode, sit there and stare at the wall — it’s a self-defence tactic to spare whoever I’m getting angry at, and to spare myself: unfortunately, I’ve developed a bit of a talent for being able to say the right thing in which to hurt someone with. Unleashing it comes at a high price, and I like the people in my life, so I would literally rather bite through my own tongue then let any of that vitriol fly when I’m angry and not thinking straight.
The rubbish trucks come for the bins every Tuesday. On Monday evening, around 9pm, I’ll wheel mine out to the road. There’s no streetlights out here, and I live in a rural area — so on dark nights when we’ve lost the moon, you can look up and see the Milkyway, like you’re standing underneath a river of stars.
I buy myself flowers; the women at the florist in town treat me like I’m their most favourite person in the world (and I eat that shit up). Afterwards I’ll be carrying whatever weeds I’ve bought with me, through the supermarket or whatever, and someone will always comment on them. I’ve lost one of the pearl earrings that belonged to my Grandmother’s set, a woman long gone, now; I’ve also misplaced my favourite hairclip, pale blue with a shinning shell clasp, that I got from a seller that shut down during the mess of last year.
Last weekend, I visited the cemetery; I sat with who I was visiting and watched an old man half a lawn away from me sit in a folded chair and read a book, play a little radio. A couple, visiting one of the plots behind us, carefully took the decorations on it - frogs, lots and lots of frogs - and brushed them off, wiped them down. Reglued a few and then set them all back into place, proudly.
There’s a young boy, interred next to my person, who I never met in life; he was fifteen years old and it’s been five years, now, and his site is littered with rubgy scarves and laminated letters from his friends, photos of them together, photos of them separately, growing up without him. Empty bottles of beer, badly written poems about meeting again. I say hello to him as I peel mandarins as a offering for the possums that forage around the cemetery at night, and occasionally I brush the leaves off his footy scarves and when I go to leave I say goodbye to him, too. After my last visit, I went to the busiest shopping centre in the city and ate braised beef noodle soup, from a place where they make the noodles in front of you, pulling them and stretching them easily. I messaged a friend with updates about my meal, laughing as she kept me company even from thousands of miles away, and then just as I finished, some friends who live in the city asked if I wanted to have some cake with them — from their favourite cafe. They’d given me a key to their home, earlier, so I could come and go as I pleased. The key meant a lot to me, though they’ll never know it; it meant a lot because it felt like a physical manifestation of trust, of them saying that yes, they did want me in their lives, no matter how limited or what kind of time left we had together.
People are multifaceted; like gemstones. We can be mean and delightful and trusting and hurt. I lean into the soft, squishy parts of myself with abandon — a lot of the time it works out. I tell people I love them. I let them say they love me. A couple of times, people have left my life because they didn’t have the space in theirs for me anymore — it was hurtful and ugly each time. Humans can come together so easily, sometimes, that the joy and brightness of it can make you forget how ugly and hard it is when we leave each other in the wrong way. People and things will hurt you. That’s just a fact. Some days you’re not going to have the energy for anything but the self-preservation of being distrustful, or cynical, judgemental, and that’s okay — I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, sometimes we have to be selfish to protect what’s left of our hearts.
I keep a list of things that make me smile. I also keep a list of things that fucking shit me right off. The list of things that shit me is longer than the list of things that make me smile, but it’s because when I see something good — a bright red letterbox, a little kid that’s waving to everyone, a pleasing colour of the sky — I don’t think to write it down, because it’s generally so fleeting and so cheery. It does its job. Find the small things in your day to day that you like to linger over, that make you happy; the bad stuff still happens, and you’ll still have waves where it doesn’t seem worth the effort, but the small bright things fill the moments and remind you that it’s all part and parcel of this universal existence.
Here’s to a gentle weekend ahead, Anon. ✨🌻🍊🌿
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