#i should work for that exam. probably
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me as im actively ignoring my exam on sunday, a deadline on monday, a deadline-less project i took like 2 weeks ago, a few applications i should be working on (but dw i got plenty of time 🤓) all while i have to also go to another city on monday (+ some other personal projects that i promised to myself but :'>)
#my stupid ass strikes again#i technically dont have to rush the applications but like. would be good to work on them and finish them etc you know#actually i shouldn't even think like 'i dont have to rush'. yes i do have to rush#please just rush and do them. thanks#literally as i said yesterday#none of these things are hard or complicated enough to explain my brain's mess rn. yet.#i dont wanna spiral again so i dont wanna think too hard about anything rn 👍#the heartbreaking thing is that everyone around me is so convinced that i will succeed at this#like everyone i talk to is like 'i cant wait to come visit you in whatever country u will be'#and im like hahah yeah. yep. yes i have 100% confidence that i will succeed definitely i will#and im acting very responsible and determined abt it all. dont worry i got this yupppp 👍👍👍#like. what if i fail lol. all this fucking time wasted on nothing. lol. anyway#i should work for that exam. probably#🗒
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if i had a nickel for everytime i'd been emotionally affected by a blonde fictional man, i would be so rich, i would be swimming in billions.
#hsr#aventio#dr ratio#aventurine#draw tag#it's been a while since i've drawn something like this. hehehehe i love the results but the process sucks a bit#especially if you accidentally delete your color history ;;#i have been putting out so much content of these two but that is how brainrot works my fellow people#last time i was drawing this much of something was back in 2021 when i would post weekly or multiple times a week#ahhh i should probably slow down and i think i probably will with exam season being just a month away
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Sitting here wishing my ADHD was more severe just so people could realise I actually have a problem-
#adhd#probably adhd#undiagnosed neurodivergent#undiagnosed adhd#stuff like this makes me doubt if i have adhd at all#i tried to explain how when i was doing my gcse preparations i would take a day to do an essay#“oh it takes us a whole week”#NO THATS NOT WHAT I MEAN#I HAD A WEEK TO DO IT BUT I LEFT IT TO THE LAST DAY#ON THE LAST DAY I COULDNT PROCESS THE QUESTION#I KNEW WHAT IT WANTED. I KNEW WHAT I SHOULD WRITE. BUT I ALSO DIDNT#i love english. both language and literature#but it would take me hours to even work out what i was supposed to write unless it was under timed exam conditions#when it was timed the panic would put me into hyperdrive#but i only realised last night that maybe taking a full day to work out what to write on a simple essay might not be normal#but then people point out that this kinda thing is normal and i just. dont know.#do i have adhd or am i just giving myself excuses for being slow#or do i expect others to be so much faster and see myself as slow in comparison#im so sure i have adhd but i dont know either
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i just wanted to say to people that i have written with , have yet to and have still not interacted with ( i’m so sorry ) that if i am not meeting your expectations , i will take no offence if you unfollow. i have an awful tendency to not reach out because of shyness and on top of that i am . . . a terrible replier. and i am so sorry for that. since this is a critical year for me and it’s the first time i’ve faced full time employment , my speed has absolutely fallen but i have always been relatively slow. i also get so easily overwhelmed and forgetful so if i ever miss your messages or anything please don’t hesitate to prod me again i won’t find it as pestering as long as it’s a gentle reminder. thank you for understanding i love you all.
#* ✦ 𝐈. ❮ ooc ❯ ⸻ ❝#i’ve been feeling a little guilty as of late so i just wanted to put this out there#i’m always excited to write with people but my shortfalls stop me sobs#i am trying to prioritise threads and answer asks here and there#but realistically my maximum might be a thread a day#as i near towards my exams it will probably go silent other than messages on discord here and there#but speaking of messages i’m really sorry if all you get are one word replies#my brain is probably just in overdrive and i wanna put something out before i forget to reply at all#anyways i have work now cries#even though i cut back my hours it’s still so fatiguing maybe i should grab some b12#okay kiss kiss
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Odyssey AU where Varré plays Circe and offers a magic concoction to Tarnished that turns them into lambkins. That's it send post
#this was inspired by waterhouse's painting where circe is offering the cup to ulysses#which is one of my favorite paintings of all time#i just imagined varré as circe in it sitting on the chair/throne in the same pose#there are a few more lambkins around though#damn the original such a good painting. i love it#also hot witch got me acting crazy lol#(hot surgeon too btw lol)#i thought this as an au for my story but it can work with any story or characters tbh#i'll probably draw this sooner or later#i should be studying for my architecture exam what am i doing here#white mask varre#varre x tarnished#(implied)#elden ring writing#elden ring fic#elden ring
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……. a gojo concept just entered my brain but i’m not sure if i should just drop it and rant in the tags or write a lil drabble … perhaps even a Fic 🤔🤔 hmmmmm hm hm. hm
#…. he’s starting to haunt me#it’s probably a good idea to focus on some gojo wips before i write smth on sugu#gotta give both meowmeows equal attention!!#personally i think this concept is attractive as fuck but . yk ……. i’m Me#……………… should i just write a short fic. maybe……………………#i’m supposed to be working on my uni exam but :((( toru……. toru concept ……….#ari noises ✩
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I AM DONE 😭😭 Exam week is behind me, I am literally sobbing, I am exhausted beyond repair, but it is done!! Five more days of work and then I (hopefully) shall have my life back-
#I wanna draw so bad - but I also want to sleep for 14 hours straight#also I should probably really not work next week I landed myself both once at the doctors office and once at the hospital last week#when I said 'I will finish this week even if it kills me' my body was like. 👀 I can do that#but honestly that was my own stupidity also#I could take this to the educational route but let me just say if you do have an infected wound anywhere go 👏 to 👏 your 👏 doctor#that being said I have at least one exam finished with 100% (which wasn't THAT hard) and I can talk about autoimmune responses and then-#I cough and I die#academia yes but absolutely no common sense#i'm still having a fever tho#I wanna sleep till next year
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This weekend wasn't enough I need 2 more T.T
#1 to do all the work i still have not been able to do and 1 to unwind from doing all the stuff#No really how has anyone else managed to do all this? Have they halfassed all this? Maybe i should ask :l#But like. I know this woman. This is the hrm woman i was complaining about like 2 semesters ago. This woman makes the worst paper in the#World. Thinking nah ill make up my grade in the paper is the road to retaking this course. You have to make up in assignments what you know#She'll take away in the exam#Sigh#3 complete sadists this semester :l 3! And one actually really brilliant prof who is notorious for giving awful grades but whatever shes#Good i like her. And the other 2 are good :) but these 3! Need to find new jobs somewhere else PLEASE!#For the sake of whatever dredges of sanity i have left#Actually 3 weekends would be nicer. I need to sleep#Oh wait what am i on about everyone else is probably using chatgpt#Right#Ok
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Been writing a post-canon Disco Elysium fanfic, having a lot of fun with it! Just posted Chapter 3, feel free to check it out :D It's mostly Gen for now, but there will likely be allusions to Kim/Harry in the future (with possible sides of Harry/Jean and Jean/Kim).
Premise: look guys le Retour is coming and Harry is confused, also the city is being kinda loud and he starts seeing bright colours? Whole mystery surrounding that. Also some standard immediately post-Martinaise Harry adjusting to regular life.
#disco elysium#de fanart#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#jean vicquemare#author has just finished uni exams and can't be stopped#typos are possible#I should really get better at proof reading my work but#probably won't
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Fellas i am nervous
#i have an exam tomorrow#but its not just a regular exam. its an exam for a big group project that we've been doing since january#we even have to dress formal for it#its kinda like a thesis defense (or whatever its called in english)#but um anyway i am afraid that im gonna get a bad grade or that theyre gonna ask questions i cant answer#cause this is a group project so i dont really know that well about everything (though we probably should know each other's parts well)#but uhh anyway this project is not as important as my thesis (which i still have to work on)#so its probably fine if i make mistakes. i mean. our seniors made mistakes in their project and they passed so like i dont have to worry#and its only 3 credits which is low compared to actual thesis (5 credits)#but like... yknow... its starting to get into my head#im aware that this is a very normal reaction to a very normal event but goddddd i should learn how to meditate#on the other hand. i am excited to wear formal clothes bcs ive never had to wear them before hehe#im especially looking forward to wearing the black boots and black trousers combination#it made me feel so cool when i looked into the mirror#but anyway yeah. press like to wish me luck bcs i need it😞
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🙄🫠
#yk when i said i'm back to being active on tumblr well yeah 😅#i had to write a seminar paper for uni and it hasn't been going well because i got sick and didn't get much done#well i got an extension luckily but it still was a struggle the topic was just rly difficult to write about#i'm almost done now at least some 300 words i still have to write and then proofread and work on better formulating but yay#i should get it done today but yeah i'll manage so i'll be back when i'm done the latest tmrw#but seminar papers are for real my least favorite part of uni 😅 it's so time consuming and can be a real struggle ugh#i rather write an exam lmao#but anyway i needed to rant ://#my money got stolen 🙃😫#sometimes life just throws some shit at you ugh#like having to write this paper and not having a social life anymore isn't enougj#i don't know how it happened? i mean i don't know for sure but i can't explain it another way#like the money was in my wallet the day before yesterday and yesterday the whole day i didn't use my wallet qnd then it was gone??#maybe while i was at uni football but that's crazy it was not some public place but in a school gym lockerroom??#or maybe someone stole it from my backpack on the street idk?? but i didn't notice#but that was money i got for my birthday from my dad and aunts 😪#and i wanted to buy something nice with it and ig i will anyway but it sucks :((#it was not a little no i had 150€ in my wallet 😭 at least my credit cards are still there ig#but i realize now how stupid that probably was to carry so much money with but i thought it was safe fr#like i have lived in austria all my life and this never happened to me 😫 and it was not like i was walking around with my wallet openly#i mean i will be fine it would be a lot worse if that happened to someone who is just barely getting by but i'm still upset#and my mom told me that apparently it happened to a friend of her as well when she was in my city but like i never heard that before...#from any of my friends ... or maybe it really is that more dangerous with thieves in my uni city but like i wasn't aware#bc i mean in general austria is like a very safe country comparatively and feels like it never was on my mind#maybe it's horrible bad luck but in the future I will be careful to carry any cash with me 🙃
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help me my mom is shipping me with some random chinese man whom i helped buying tickets
#it's crazy. knowing english and helping random foreigners is my passion#also so many things happening. i should write that fucking article when i get home lmfao#if my laptop wont fail me (i think she's fine now????? hopefully????)#but also like. I'll get to that tomorrow probably.#you know what i wanna do? if my laptop wont fail me i wanna play my fuckin game lmao#but idk if i should or if i will have time when i get home etc etc#also one more thing i look so freaking ugly in biometric photos im gonna sjjsnsndhdhfhhf#anyway if it works out i will have another photo next year so im trying not to let it get to me lmao#alsoooo just yesterday got accepted by a school in finland and today got a reply from one in germany#and they want me to take an exam in july lmao???? girl how tf will i get a visa etc with that timeline#anyway. ughhhhhh so many things happening etc#i wonder how my next months will be like. ok bys#bye*#🗒
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im so annoyed with everything today, i think i need some tasty food and a million hours of sleep and then I'll be back to normal
#the teacher at the first class today was so dibsjdhdhdhdhsgs 😫#like she was teaching us things that are like unrelated to the class that shes teaching so idek why she was teaching it#but also its things that we have been learning since the 1st semester and we've done them in at least 10 classes and she was acting like#this was the 1st time we were hearing about it#like oh yeah we're on the 7th semester of studying nutrition but no one bothered to tell us how many calories are in a gram of fat#and she gave us homework 'to see if we know this' like#oh yes i can make a meal plan for a child with crohns or cystic fibrosis or celiac disease or everything else we've done this semester and#all the other semesters but i guess i cant tell you what micronutrients are in this one breakfast meal#like fuck off and stick to what you're supposed to be teaching#anyway i know im getting more annoyed than i should but she was just even more annoying than usual today#like she interrupted the lesson every 5 minutes to yell at someome to be quiet i wasnt even aware there were people talking until she yelled#anyway#also my new earphones aren't working well idk why ive definitely not been mistreating them that much for them to break in less than a month#like i had my old pair for at least 4 years until the broke and i dont think the wire got cut in them like the sound was coming out weird#but there was sound coming out. in the new ones you need to hold them in a very specific angle for sound to come out#and like im careful with how i put them away so what is up with them?#my theory is that they make wired earphones shitty on purpose so that you will spend a lot of money and buy wireless#also we had said from Tuesday that we would hang out with my friends today but i guess they forgot or idk and they made other plans#(to go home and sleep) and during the weekend the one friend wont be here and next week my family will be here so we probably wont hang out#again until next year and we have exams almost immediately so we wont be hanging out much then either#also my period is supposed to come soon and i hope that it will either come today or it will wait until after Christmas#ideally it will never come ever again but we cant always get what we want#anyway im gonna go eat the rest of my μεσογειακό and go take a nap#jo says stuff#personal ramblings
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Exam week starts tomorrow and I'm 100% not ready. Sure, I can write a 7k word fanfic in two nights, but NOT an essay in two hours with a teacher watching all of my actions TT
PUTTING CHEMISTRY AND PORTUGUESE TOGETHER ON THE SAME DAY SHOULD BE A CRIME!! /Hj
#it's a new school and I don't know how they work...#AND IT'S A CLASS WITH FOCUS ON MILITAR EXAMS WHICH ARE THE MOST DIFFICULT IN THE COUNTRY???#yet I'll have to take them this year *cries*#but at least I'll have more break time (which I probably should spend studying...)
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Saw a glimpse of your post and thought it said “lactose time! how nice”
i see you’re just as exhaustion-illiterate as i am
#the amount of times today i’ve misread stuff in the silliest way…#actually it is 1am. i should go to bed probably#it’s been a very long day#had class for an hour starting at 9#a midterm exam that was mostly freehand writing for another hour right afterwards#a long walk somewhere and more work to be done there#taking me about 2 hours#then a hop over to the next room where i stayed for another 2 hours#then a zoom call that took me about another hour#plus the usual typical Eepiness i have bc i rarely get enough sleep i’m so busy#all that with no breaks. i was dead#this wasn’t supposed to have turned into me going off about myself lol#yeah i didn’t name the towns in this game idk man#asks#deityofhearts#goldie plays pokémon black
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So busy with Sparkstember that I almost forgot that I go back to school on tuesday
#honestly maybe it's better this way. i'd rather just not care at all rather than be super stressed about it#just like i've been doing with every little thing for most of my life#might have missed the date when we were supposed to choose our elective courses. well whatever Lol#and i still don't even know what my schedule is or what classes i have this semester oopsie#well the university itself doesn't seem particularly pressed about giving us the schedule either#but i'd probably better still read up on the classes at least before they start#i don't have high hopes for this year just like with the last. probably should just stop pretending that i still want to study anything atp#this wasn't even my first choice of a course bcs i had to prepare for that damn exam to be accepted for my preffered one#but i couldn't be bothered to study for it again which probably should have told me enough abt whether going into this again is a good idea#i'm so tired just thinking about it but i know that actually looking for a job and then having a job will be a thousand times worse so uh#but at least i'd have my own money and start doing something ughhhh. useful maybe. who knows what it will be though#i have no ideaaaaaa. but this feels like just putting off the inevitable. like at some point i need to get my shit together#i will probably report at the end of the next week about how i'm so done already#i don't really knowwww mannnnnm. i don't feel like i had any vacation at all even though 3 months have already passed#and i also sort of didn't prepare something relatively easy to do that would have given me an actual document#that would confirm that i actually finished that part-time school thing last semester#can't really be bothered to come back to it at this point though#well at least i learned something actually useful and interesting from that and that's enough for me tbh#and a lot of it is also relevant to my current area of interest (digital drawing and computer graphics in general)#well speaking of which i'd better just get back to drawing now lol. just one more left to finish!!!#in short i guess that my new way of dealing with stress is just ignoring it all#well it's worked in some way at least so it can't be an entirely bad thing lol#goosepost
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