#i should re-read KILL sometime soon i miss the beasts

[royaltyfreeramblings]

Hey. Got any thoughts on skin 3 chrom? :]

fun fact, there are two green chroms who occupy a lot of Brainspace for me.

There's Bing Cpuk who is. One of my favorite characters. I cannot explain why I have latched onto this man the way I have but his mediocre fight record, swagless demeanor, and general normality have captivated my heart and soul. we have a landmark on the minecraft server named after him. i just like him a lot.

And on the Fanfuffle side of things there's Dew from KILL, who's a florist who has been through soso much. also he's a level 1 cpu.

[definitely-not-karen]

My unnecessary and irrelevant reviews about the transformers media I have consumed.

Please let me have this. I was doom scrolling and transformers is my comfort fandom.

G1: I have not watched all of it, I do plan on doing so but I did watch it when I was younger and does invoke nostolgia. I watched it on Teletoon Retro (does that even exist anymore?) ((just googled it, rip teletoon retro)). For some reason I really like the episode The Ultimate Weapon. I am a huge fan of First Aid and it was because of this episode and I have no idea why. Rodimus is the main character of that episode with First Aid just having a very prominent role in the side story of that episode. I really liked the Aerialbots and their storyline with the time traveling and the not knowing if they’re on the right side was really cool. Honestly the animation errors and weird inconsistent story are part of the charm I guess.

RID 2001: another show I’ve only seen tidbits of. I watched this one via random episodes illegally uploaded to YouTube in the early to mid 2010s and now all those videos are taken down. As a lover of camp, this is camp. I love it. Transformers as a concept is pretty camp (which is why I adore it) and I definitely will watch all of this one day. Though Sideburn is cool and all, I do wish he didn’t chase a red sports car every episode. Otherwise he’s one of my favourites cause himbo rights I guess.

Transformers IDW 2005: So... I read the entirety of the idw comics purely because I found out Thundercracker was a screenplay writer and I wanted to read the entire story so I got the complete context of his development from scary fighter jet to an Oscar winner. I was not disappointed, I was met with queer and trans representation of all sorts, a diverse storyline with action filled parts, comedy elements, slice of life, political drama, adventure, horror, and the best road trip through space. Honestly I was not expecting transformers of all things to have queerness represented so casually and quite well in my opinion (though technically they are guilty of bury your gays, I don’t count it cause there was a clear reason for that death) Thundercracker was marked as one of my favourites cause of this series. I did experience a wonderful story because I wanted to see how he got his happy ending. My biggest criticism of idw transformers is that I love their interpretations of characters and sadly I know I’ll probably never get to seen them like that again. But if I want to experience those characters like that, I’ll just re read it I guess.

Transformers Animated: I have watched the entirety of this great show twice and it still love it. Funny characters, a human character that has a purpose, and a fun change to the formula, Transformers Animated has one of my favourite Optimus and made a Bumblebee so lovably loud they had to take away his voice so he wouldn’t become too powerful. Loved all of the characters except the human villains, Headmaster did not age well and I wasn’t in love with Ratchet’s design but his personality more than made up for it. If you want more animated, I love Transformers ReAnimated the void is filled by that series and channel. While I wish it got another season, it’s ending was satisfying enough I guess.

Transformers Prime: Smokescreen is great and was underutilizes -100/10. Just kidding, kind of I really enjoyed Prime. I’ve only watched through it completely once cause when I was a child I did not like the designs since apparently as a child I was a G1 loyalist I guess. Though now Prime has one of my favourite styles that still holds up today. Dramatic story with actual character development, I can over look that the plots a tad slow. I wish Breakdown was utilized more and it also could have benefited from an extra season but the movie wrapped it up much better than animated’s ending. Knockout is an amazing character and I was spoiled while I was watching it that he turns Autobot though I didn’t realize that wasn’t until the literal end of the series. Would’ve like a completely fleshed out Breakdown and Knockout or at least Knockout redemption arc but there’s always fanfiction I guess.

Robots in Disguise 2015: I didn’t hate it? It definitely helped that I watched this before Prime for some reason. I liked the designs, Sideswipe... himbo rights. Biggest flaw is the lack of character growth. I just want nice things for Sideswipe, Strongarm and Fixit. Grimlock was fun, I like Bumblebee trying to be a good leader and Optimus should have stayed dead. The crossover and referenced to Rescue Bots was fun and Blurr and Sideswipe was the rivalry I didn’t know I needed. But the one I really needed was Smokescreen in there too. The ending arc was interesting though not executed the best and Steeljaw did a lot of the heavy lifting for the villain side to a point where they over utilized him and his character suffered as a result. Windblade was not as bad as people online said she was, splitting the group up into two was stupid cause I’m bitter and still don’t want Optimus there. Also long list of underutilization: Denny and Russel Clay, Jazz, all the characters from prime except Optimus and Bee, Jetfire and Jetstorm, More Rescue bots, and many more! Like that girl that’s Russel’s friend that I literally don’t remember because I’m pretty sure the writers forgot about her! Anyways, in retrospect the show probably wasn’t great but I liked it I guess.

Rescue Bots: This show is way better than it needed to be. I actually love the no Decelticons and war. I’m a sucker for slice of life and especially slice of life with a twist. Human villains that were actually interesting, actual character development, continuity (somewhat), great human characters all while being target for children. I’m so happy I watched this show while I was kind of the target age and rewatching it for the third time was great cause some of the science jargon actually made sense to me. Satisfying ending too and honestly it can just appeal to everyone. Love all four of the main rescue bots and constantly wish they made evergreen designs and toys for them so they could at least make cameos in other transformers media. Sometimes it’s nice to have transformers being wholesome I guess.

Rescue Bots Academy: ... I was not the age democratic for this show and I somehow still liked it? Maybe it’s the fact that I’ve been gravitating to more wholesome content due to current events but it was actually good? Love all the students, I do miss the old crew and characters like Doc Green and Frankie are under utilized and the Burns family is almost nowhere to be found :(. Once again there’s some actual character development and Hot Shot’s mentor relationship with Heatwave is super sweet. Also actually having positive post war Decepticon and Autobot relationships in this children’s show? Woah. Biggest issue is like RID 2015; the lack of continuity and characters completely disappearing. Perceptor was fun and I was not expecting him to appear. And I love me some microscope dude. It was a good send off for the aligned continuity I guess.

Cyberverse: ending too soon. I was about to be upset that bumblebee didn’t have his voice but he had his voice in his head which was great. Episodes like the velocitron one was really good and it definitely got better with each season and peaked in the Quintesson arc and then rolled to the cancellation date. Thundercracker shouldn’t have been killed off but I’m very biased. Seeing the rebuilding of Cybertron was cool. Windblade and Bumblebee had a fun relationship. I really liked this iteration of Grimlock. Perceptor was super interesting but then they did nothing with him after the Quintesson arc which was a shame and I would have liked to see better relationships between the Autobots and Decepticons after the team up. Also wholesome Whirl was fun. Honestly this needed one more season so bad. I just think it could have been great if it got one. But it’s still good I guess.

War for Cybertron: ...let’s see how I feel after Kingdom comes out but right now, meh. For me my favourite transformers characters usually end up being side characters due to me wishing they had more screen time so in this case, Red Alert is great please show me more of Red Alert. I get what all the people are saying about the voice acting and whatever but I can look past it (though please give us Peter Cullen or let the current VC make his own Optimus voice). But one thing is that all the YouTube reviewers be saying that I completely agree with is that it’s dark. Like lighting wise. I occasionally had trouble making out what was happening because it was dark. Honestly my biggest issue isn’t a fault of the show. I like development of multiple characters to be shown so I can fall in love with a multitude of characters but due to short seasons, it makes sense to focus in completely on one character at a time. Siege in my opinion at least let me see more of the background characters rather than Earthrise but I’d probably like Earthwise more if I was a bigger fan of Optimus. I’m going to watch Kingdom but I’m not expecting to be wowed I guess.

In conclusion, I should watch Beast Wars, I’m going to re read the ending of Lost Light again and revel in the melancholic ending I adore and I really like Thundercracker and First Aid. One great thing about transformers and other franchises that have been around for awhile, if you don’t like the current thing, there’s plenty of last media and you probably won’t need to wait too long for the next piece of media you’ll hopefully like.

Please be good idw 2019, I’ve read a bit of you and I have a scrap of hope. Oh please please please be good. Give some characters the Thundercracker treatment.

[artificialqueens]

Elastic Heart - Part 3 (Branjie) - Mia Ugly

A/N: Soooo this chapter took a turn for the sad-bastardish, but I swear there will be less moodiness and more kissing in the future. Also I’m trying to use she/her pronouns in Drag Race, and he/him out of drag, but sometimes it all goes to hell, bear with me! Thanks to everyone who’s been so sweet about this fic so far.

Social media -

Is not Brock’s strength area. 

Detox used to hassle him about it before he even went on Drag Race, and he made a promise to himself that he would do a better job after.  Tell the world when he - ate a bowl of cereal or whatever. 

Post photos of his cats at the very least.

So when his manager comes to him with the expectation that he and Jose play up their relationship for the fans, Brock says: (nonononononononononono)

He says “fine.”

Jose’s in, apparently, and - well, Brock can only take that information second-hand because the two of them haven’t really.  Spoken. Recently. 

He says “fine” and then he goes on Jose’s Instagram and almost has a panic attack (because some people are so pretty it is unfair, some people are basically built to break your heart - from atoms to molecules to cells.

Jose in sweats and snapbacks. 

Vanessa in gloss and feathers. 

Each one feels like a hand around Brock’s throat.)

So. 

After about thirty minutes in the fetal position, Brock leaves it all in his manager’s hands (or whoever his manager is paying for social media these days.)  Someone adds flirty comments and cute photos to anything Jose posts, someone keeps the fans happy.  

Brock doesn’t need to see it.

It’s too soon (too much, too real) for him.

He tries to avoid Instagram; Twitter is about all he can handle (he knows his mom follows him and he doesn’t want to make her worry.)  He doesn’t read  any of the speculative articles about their relationship, but he is always extremely polite when he’s asked about it (just flirty enough to give the fans hope. Professional, friendly, not too fond. It’s a fine line, and he worries sometimes that his feelings rise a bit close to the surface.  That the people who know him best are going to watch one of these interviews, peer through the ice at his blue skin and see everything.)

Friends keep texting him.  Leaving him voicemails, asking him how he’s doing.  Brock ignores the ones he can, and responds whenever anyone seems a bit too concerned. Gotta make sure the outside world stays outside.

Clearly it’s all going to come out by the time the finale airs, and that’s just something Brock will have to be ready for.  Maybe he can do a European tour.  Or an Antarctic one.  They don’t have internet there, do they?

He’s wonderful, I love him, he says on ET Canada as if that doesn’t mean anything, as if it isn’t the first time he’s said ‘I love him’ out loud.

Brock keeps working (because he’s still a force of nature, even without a crown.)  He does shows across the mid-West, hosts club nights, dances the house down because he is a queen, damn it. He goes on tour with the First Wives Fight Club, let’s Ginger Minj distract him with the most offensive jokes Brock’s ever heard (and it’s good to feel outrage rather than longing, for a change. It’s good to do something different, something that’s not related to Drag Race and soft-skinned Puerto Ricans who won’t answer his calls.)

Or probably won’t.

Because Brock hasn’t called.  

It’s shady and pathetic and each day feels like pulling teeth out, but he’s trying to respect the boundaries Jose put up. They said their piece at the reunion before Brock died of blunt force trauma to the chest (it’s fine, he’s fine) and he’s not the kind of person to push someone to take him back.  

To beg someone to want him. 

He can’t say if it’s pride or fear that stops him every time he gets shit-faced and picks up his phone.  He can’t count the number of texts he’s written and then deleted.  And then re-written.

The night after the First Wives show in Vancouver, the other queens go out to whatever local club hasn’t been closed yet, and Brock goes for a run on the beach. It’s dark out, and after a couple of miles he stops, stretches, and sits cross-legged in the sand.  

The ocean reaches out for him, black-fingered and impetuous, dotted with the twinkling lights of oil tankers. 

Brock hasn’t had anything to drink.  There’s really no excuse when he takes his phone out of his pocket, scrolls to Jose’s number.

His thumb hovers over the keys, thinking thinking (over-thinking).

(I’m on the West coast and I’m miserable without you and I want to hear you laugh again even if it’s at me even if it’s mean I want to hear your voice and you killed it on Jimmy Kimmel and I’m losing my mind I think you’re incredible I think you’re hilarious and brilliant and I miss you I miss youImiss -)

“Damn it,” Brock hisses, because he’s smarter than this. He’s stronger than this (he wants that to be true.)

“I’ll be at Drag Con,” he texts before he can think too much about it. “Hope i see u.”

He waits.  He’ll probably delete it without sending.  He should delete it without sending because Jose doesn’t want to talk to him.

His thumb sits on the ‘Send’ key, barely touching it.  It’s such a pointless, empty message.  It doesn’t say any of the things he wants to say. 

This was easy once.  Talking to Jose was like breathing. What the fuck happened? (He knows what happened, and he resists the urge to throw his phone into the sea.)

After a few seconds, Brock deletes the message and puts his phone down. 

Then he picks it back up.

He bites the inside of his cheek, a habit he mostly gave up in middle school.

This was easy once. 

(“When this is all over –“

“Oh Jesus, oh Mary, there she goes.” Vanjie at her station, rummaging through yards of tulle. “You wanna shack up or something? Get cats, turn me into a proper wifey?”

“Well.  I was thinking more like buy you dinner.”  Brooke doesn’t touch her, because the world is watching. Still - her eyes linger on the bones of Vanjie’s hands, her wrists, her jaw.  There is not a part of her body that doesn’t beg for contact, not a part of her that Brooke doesn’t want to touch.

“Ha, okay. But I’m a classy ho.  It’s gotta be Olive Garden at least, get me some unlimited breadsticks.”  

There’s a faint blush on her cheekbones even though she’s rolling her eyes, and it makes Brooke love her even more than –

Shit.

Shit.

She did not just think that word.  

They aren’t - there yet.  Brooke’s tired and stressed and her brain is clearly short-circuiting. It’s nothing.  It’s fine.

“That shut you up, hey? Olive Garden too bougie for you? Don’t worry, girl– when this is all over and I’m a honey-thousand dollars richer, I’ll take you anywhere you want.”)

He should have known then.

Stopped it all in its tracks before it got totally out of control. But he didn’t.

Brock lies back against the sand, breathes in the copper-sweet taste of the ocean.  

(That’s a star, right?) 

The waves roll in, and he can almost see stars.

* * *

Back in her hotel room, she’s running over choreography for Tuckpantistan in her head, counting under her breath (one and two and three and -) when a noise distracts her.  

A papery scratching at her hotel-room door.  When Brooke goes to investigate, she sees a folded note that’s been slid underneath it.

U up?

Then below it: Haha, JK. Got a PA to deliver this, some real high school shit. Thinking bout your pretty face. <3 <3 <3

It’s signed Papi and Brooke turns rose-petal pink with embarrassment and pleasure.  Fuck, she wishes she had her phone. Wishes she could FaceTime Vanjie any time she wanted, see her all bleary-eyed and soft and sleepy.  Just the thought of that image makes Brooke’s heart clench painfully, and she tries not to think about why.

Instead she takes out the notepad from the desk in the hotel room.

How do I know this is really you and not just a producer fucking with me?

She folds the paper into a flat square and writes Return to Sender on the front of it, before sliding it under her hotel room door. 

Then she immediately feels like an idiot.

This is ridiculous.  They aren’t teenagers.

Brooke goes back to rehearsing for tomorrow, and tells herself there isn’t a stupid smile on her face.  That would just be too undignified. 

About fifteen minutes later (not that Brooke was counting or paying attention or anything) she hears that same scratching sound, and goes back to the door.  A new piece of paper has been slid underneath it, and Brooke bites down on a grin.

You want a ring or some shit? 

Thought you’d like that, something only the real MISS VANESSA VANJIE MATEO would know. This PA’s real nice, I’ma take advantage of her. UNLESS SHE’S READING THIS. 

What you wearing?

Brooke snorts out a laugh (then covers her face and pretend that sound didn’t just come out of her.)  She sketches out a quick, terribly unsexy picture of herself (basically a beefy stickman in pajama pants and a t-shirt) then folds it up and sticks it back under the door.  This is the most bizarre flirtation she has ever taken part in, and - and she shouldn’t enjoy it as much as she does.

Vanjie’s reply includes a decidedly more X-rated stickman.

I better get some nudes next. Gotta occupy my time somehow besides missing on you.

Brooke laughs at the thought of the horrified PA that could be reading this.

You’ve seen it all in the werkroom anyway, she writes, And you could occupy your time with sleeping, maybe?

Brooke sends the note off, and gives up the ghost of rehearsing for a minute. She stretches out on her bed, arms against the headboard and bare feet nearly hanging off the end.  Story of her life, really.  She’s always felt like she’s too big, too tall, too much.  Compared to Vanessa, she’s like some sort of beast, stumbling around crushing beautiful, delicate things beneath her feet.  

Vanessa is beautiful. Brooke wouldn’t call her ‘delicate’ though, not by a long shot. She knows Vanjie well enough by now to know that she can hold her own.  

(She wonders how much of that attitude is for the show. What Vanjie’s like when she’s all alone.  Every so often there’s a moment where it seems like the other queen is letting her guard down, softening the sideways grin and adorable swagger that Brooke sees when the cameras are rolling. 

How much of that is protective, Brooke wonders.  How much of that swagger is self-defense?

How much of that humor is about survival.)

There is a reply not even ten minutes later: Nah girl, you’re keeping me up. Gonna think about you in those overalls all night, haha. When I can’t do shit tomorrow I’ll be blaming your fine self for messing with my head.

Brooke folds and unfolds Vanjie’s reply too many times, unwilling to put it down. She’s glad she can’t see herself, knows that she’s probably glowing with affection. She’s got a crush, right, just like she told them in the confessional.  That’s what this is. Just a massive, ridiculous crush. 

An impossible, stupid, hopeless crush.

I take no responsibility for that. 

But also your angel costume is the real problem here, how am I supposed to get anything done?  

Go to sleep and dream about my overalls, Miss Vaaaaanjie.

Brooke has had crushes before.  She’s always survived them.

When she slides her note back under the door she thinks that will be the end of it, but a reply comes later, clock nearing midnight and shadows sliding like fingers through the blinds.

Sweet dreams Brooky Poo.

Brooke holds the note against her chest, and laughs, and when she falls asleep she’s still smiling.  Her dreams are full of white feathers, falling gently as snow from the ceiling of her hotel room. Settling soft as a promise against Brooke’s open mouth.

[morganaspendragonss]

make myself a king

A/N: This was originally written for the Sam Winchester ‘Zine. The whole ‘zine is free and now available for you to read on their blog @samwinchesterzine! Many, many thanks to the wonderful mods and to everyone who has participated - it’s been an absolute joy to work on this project.

Rating: T

Pairing: minor Jessica Moore/Sam Winchester, mostly gen

Word count: 2561

Summary: Sam dreams of faces in the shadows, of yellow eyes watching his every move. He dreams of fire and blood and death, and he dream of destiny. There are demons talking in Sam Winchester's head and, sometimes, he listens.

Warnings/tags: Angst, hurt/comfort, Boy King AU, hurt Sam, show-level violence, canon divergence, pre-series

read on ao3 || ff.net

Sam has the first dream when he is five years old. He dreams quite a lot, actually, but this one is different. There’s a man in front of him, but Sam can’t really tell what he looks like; he can only see his shadow. His sil-hou-ette. (Miss Jemima taught him that word last week. The ‘h’ is silent).

The man moves closer, but he’s still just a silhouette, even when he’s right in front of Sam. He can only see the figure’s eyes, bright yellow ones that never seem to blink or look away. Sam tries to shy away, but the figure just follows him wherever he goes. 

Giving up, Sam balls his hands into fists and stands as tall as he can, frowning at the figure. “Who are you?” he demands.

The figure starts laughing, the sound spreading all around Sam. It’s not a nice laugh, not like Dean has, or Dad when he’s in a good mood, and Sam instantly curls back in on himself, fear enveloping him. 

“Soon,” the yellow-eyed man promises, and then he’s gone.

Sam wakes up with a start. He remembers his dream and shakes Dean awake, earning himself a few tired swipes and a lot of grumbling. Eventually, though, Dean sits up and Sam barrels into an explanation, making sure he leaves nothing out. When he’s done, he looks at Dean expectantly, but his brother just sighs and lies back down.

“It was just a dream, Sam,” Dean mumbles. “Go back to sleep.”

------

The figure doesn’t appear again for a while, and Sam starts to think that maybe Dean was right all along. But then he reads Dad’s journal, and it visits him once more.

The shadow speaks first this time, yellow eyes dancing with humour. “So,” he says. “You know.”

Sam imagines him smirking, although he still can only see the eyes. “I know that you’re a monster,” he replies, trying to sound brave. He’s not sure it works though; his voice quivers and his hands shake at his sides.

The figure moves, an arm going up to rest on his chest. “Me?” it asks, affronted. “Your father has lied to you all your life, your brother, too. They kill things without question, without remorse. So tell me, Sam, who is the real monster?”

Sam frowns. He hates that he’s been lied to, but lies don’t make people monsters. “They kill evil.”

He laughs, harsh, short. “Good, evil, black, white,” he says. “They are not so different. You don’t understand yet, but you will.”

“Why don’t you show yourself to me?” Sam calls out, frustration rising.

“I can’t,” the figure says simply. “I have no body, and you can’t look upon my true form.” He pauses, and Sam imagines he smiles, then. “Not yet, anyway.”

“What -” Sam starts, but then those yellow eyes turn on him, gazing deep into his soul. As he stands there, fixed to the spot, Sam feels something stir beneath his skin, writhing and twisting. He stares at his hands in horror, an energy, a power concentrating in them. 

“You have so much power, boy,” the figure hisses. “You could be a king.”

Sam can hear his heart pounding in his chest when he wakes. He sits up slowly, his hands still feeling alive with that unnatural power. He looks over to where Dean is asleep on the other bed and briefly thinks about waking him up, but he knows he can’t. 

It was just a dream, after all.

------

The dreams come and go, after that. Sometimes Sam will go weeks without seeing so much as a hint of the figure; other times he’ll come to him three days in a row. The whisper of power never quite goes away either - Sam can always feel it lurking, dormant, in his veins, whispering in his ears to unleash it. He feels eyes following him everywhere he goes, yellow ones, waiting for him to give in. He tries mentioning it, but the few times he brings it up with Dad, or Dean, or even Uncle Bobby, he’s met with Later, Sam, or I’m busy, or Get back to work, we don’t have time. 

So.

He takes matters into his own hands, the way he’s been learning to do for years now, long before he knew the truth. He shuts himself in local libraries whenever he can (which is often; that’s where Dad prefers him to be) and pours over lore on yellow-eyed creatures. Most of it is useless, talking about inhuman beasts with the claws and minds of animals, which Sam knows this thing is not. But there are other books, few as they may be, that tell of demons and devils who sit at Satan’s right hand. Sam wants these to be wrong, too, but he can feel the truth of them in his bones, and he feels heavy with this new knowledge.

He steals these books away, knowing that no-one will notice them going missing, and hides them in his gear, reading and re-reading them when Dad and Dean aren’t looking. He commits every word to memory, making sure he is ready to deal with whatever this demon has planned for him.

------

Just after his sixteenth birthday, the demon comes to him again, still just a shadow with sickly yellow eyes.

“I know what you are,” Sam says quietly. “What do you want with me?”

The demon cocks his head. “Someone’s been doing their homework, I see. But you’re not ready yet.”

Sam’s anger rises, and he rushes forward with a growl, grabbing at the demon’s neck. But he is only a shadow, and Sam almost falls as he disappears in his grasp. There’s cold laughter behind him and he whirls, the figure seeming amused at his persistence.

“Interesting,” he mutters. Then, “Alright. I like you Sam, so I’ll give you a little head start.”

He stretches out his hand and Sam flinches away but somehow, impossibly, cool fingers touch his forehead, sending a blinding agony shooting through him. The power in his veins fizzes gleefully and Sam’s dream dissolves, being replaced by trees and moonlight.

Sam recognises these woods as the ones near their motel, the ones where Dad had thought the wendigo they’re hunting might be hiding. He watches, paralysed, as three figures come slowly into his field of vision - Dad, Dean, and Sam himself. He tries calling out to them, but he’s completely frozen, reduced to looking on helplessly as they look for the creature.

All of a sudden, Other Sam yells, “Dad!” then lunges at John, pushing him out of the way just as the wendigo crashes through the treeline. Bright flames light up the forest as Dean ignites his flamethrower, and Sam is forced to close his eyes, the image of the dying wendigo stamped across his vision.

When he opens his eyes again, he sees Dean looming above him, scowling in annoyance.

“Get up, Sam,” he says impatiently. “Dad just called, said he’s tracked the thing down. He needs us both there as back up. You’ve got two minutes.”

Sam pushes himself upright, his dream still clearly replaying in his head. It could all just be a coincidence, but something in the back of his mind is whispering to him not to ignore it, that Dad’s going to be in danger tonight and Sam’s the only one who’ll be able to stop it. Anxiety settles in his guts, and Sam walks out of the motel knowing what he has to do.

------

Sam’s dream comes true, and Dad is pissed. Despite Sam’s best efforts, the night hadn’t gone injury-free - Sam has a long gash down his leg from where he’d fallen and Dean sports a black eye.

They have their first big fight that night, John saying that if he’d kept his damn mouth shut then the creature wouldn’t have found them; Sam retorting that he’d saved John’s life and he should be thanking him. Dean takes Dad’s side like he always has done when they’ve butted heads, but this feels different to their usual spats. It feels like something is breaking, and there’s no going back.

In his dreams that night, the demon tells him that his talents will never be appreciated as long as he’s with his family. Sam just listens, wondering not for the first time if this is ever going to end. The demon’s been in his head for over ten years, now, and Sam is still no closer to figuring out what any of it means. He just wants it to be over.

So Sam runs. Dad leaves on a hunt, and Dean’s back is turned, and Sam runs. He runs until he can’t anymore, finding himself in a cabin in Flagstaff, Arizona, with junk food and a dog and no dreams. For two whole weeks, there’s no sign of yellow eyes or shadowy figures, and even the ever-present energy begins to diminish. Sam thinks he’s finally done it. He got away, he’s out, he’s free of everything -

He’s pulled back in, and the dream of freedom fades like breath on a mirror. Sam learns that day - freedom isn’t made for people like him.

(In his dream, the demon just laughs.)

------

Two years down the line, and Sam’s running again, all the way to California. He’d promised himself all those years ago that, one day, he’d find a way out of it all, one that meant he would never have to go back again. He thinks he’s found it, now. Dad will never come and get him, not after Sam betrayed him so, and the demon can’t get to him here, in this state of sunshine and innocence. It’s perfect.

Time passes, and, sure enough, the demon goes quiet. This foreign power’s intensity dips until Sam barely knows it’s there at all. He aces college, he makes new friends, he gets a girl.

Jessica. Her name sounds so sweet on his tongue, pure and gentle, so different to everything he had growing up. He doesn’t know why she’s with him, but a part of him doesn’t care about that; the fact that she is, is enough. He loves her deeply, and a future appears before his eyes, so bright and solid that he thinks he can make it real. And, God, is he willing to make it so, because it’s everything he thought he could never have, and more.

He gets as far as looking for engagement rings when she starts to burn. His dreams are vivid, the flames searing his skin, the feeling of her blood on his head so visceral that he has to check it’s not there when he wakes. He worries that it’s starting again, that the demon is trying to tell him something, like he did the night before the wendigo hunt. But he tells himself that it can’t be - there are no eyes watching him in the shadows, no voices hissing king and power and destiny in his ears.

He’s fine. It’s fine.

Sam goes back to his carefully built life, trying to ignore the almost nightly dreams. Anyway, this is normal, right? He’s going to marry this girl - it’s only natural that he should be worried about her. It’s fine.

Two weeks later, Jessica burns on the ceiling, the future Sam had seen melting around her like glass.

------

There’s a funeral. Sam goes, watching as what’s left of the girl he loves is lowered into the earth. Her parents are there, and all their college friends, everyone dressed in black, a sharp contrast against the flowers and photos that are scattered around.

He doesn’t cry.

Dean looks like he wants to say something when they head back to the motel, but he’s never been good at this sort of thing so he stays silent. Sam’s grateful. He doesn’t want anyone else to tell him how sorry they are, how unfair it was, how cruel. Those are just words now, empty and void.

He doesn’t talk to Dean, either, which is probably unreasonable of him, but he doesn’t have it in him to care anymore. He just turns away and closes his eyes, waiting to see if sleep will come tonight.

It does, and with it comes Jessica. He watches her burst into flame, and her eyes bore into his, hard and unforgiving.

Why? she demands of him. Why Sam?

I’m sorry, he cries, like he always does, but this time the dream freezes. Something moves in Sam’s periphery, and he turns to face it, his eyes widening in shock when he sees the demon lounging in the doorway. He’s more solid now, features beginning to make themselves clear, although they are still cloaked in shadows.

“I did warn you,” he says, as though reprimanding a child.

“I thought…” Sam starts, but the words won’t come, his throat closing up as tears fill his eyes for the first time since her death.

“What?” the demon asks, his tone mocking and cruel. “You thought you could run from your destiny - run from me? Sorry, kiddo. Guess again.”

Sam looks away from the demon, gaze flicking back up to Jessica. Her eyes are wide with fear and pain, her hair fanned out around her like a halo. The flames ring her body, casting a bright glow all around her. It’s a strangely beautiful image.

Off to the side, the demon sighs. “Alright,” he says. “I’ll make you a little deal. You come with me, right now, claim your place at my side, and I can guarantee that you can see her again.”

Sam’s head jerks up at that, and he stares at the demon in shock. He’s heard of such things, of course he has, demons making deals with humans and damning their souls for eternity. It’s dangerous, he knows, and he shouldn’t do it, but…

But, Sam thinks his soul is probably already damned, for this life he’s led. All he is good for now is shadows and darkness; an angel like Jessica should never have come near him. It’s true that she would not want him to do this, but Sam is tired of fighting his destiny. He should just give up now, while he still has a choice in the matter. Or, the illusion of one, at least; he knows deep down that this is no real choice.

“Yes,” he says, voice hoarse, and the demon grins. The apartment melts away, replaced by a large hall, with a throne sitting on a raised dais at the end of it. The demon leads him through a crowd of faceless creatures to the throne, pushing Sam to his knees in front of it.

“Sam Winchester,” the demon calls, raising his voice so that it rings around the hallway. “The Boy King!”

Mutters break out around him, but they quiet as the demon produces a crown of thorns, holding high for all to see. After a moment, he lowers it to Sam’s head, the thorns piercing the skin, but Sam barely feels the pain. As soon as the crown touches him, the power that’s lain ignored for so long bursts to life, electrifying his entire body. Sam takes a shuddering breath, closing his eyes and letting the energy course through him. He smiles, his future clear once more.

The Boy King stands and takes his place on the throne of Hell.

He has work to do.

Tagging: @sam-winchester-deserves-better

Anyone who wants to be added to the tags, feel free to ask!

[kurtty-drabbles]

Hanaki desease

N/A: Ok, I´m too lazy to check out what are Jubilee´s favorite songs so I created a band for this reason.

@djinmer4 @augment-techs @raainstorms @lesdernierssous

The room smells like brimstone and beers. It could be easily mistaken for Logan´s room if a tall, built blue man who is using it spandex tail to hold the ceiling to be upside down and read a book.

Disdain and boredom morph into his face as red eyes trying to comprehend the plot that judging by this particular reader, the plot seems non-existent.

“Knock, knock” an amused and feminine voice snap the blue reader back to reality “ what are you reading? 50 shades of grey? Did I corrupt Kurt Darkholme?” the woman eyes shines in mischievous and playfully.

“Hilarious, Kitty, are you aiming to be a comedian?” asked in a blasé style and the reply received the awestruck comeback of Kitty Pryde showing her pink tongue to him.

“If you truly want to know…I´m reading a romance novel and it is really bad. I´ve 100% that this Rachel is incredibly gay for this Amy, but out of nowhere, Rachel is dating this Joe…” this tone is a bit belligerent.

“Is called queerbaiting, Kurt, it exists in every dimension, this one, our dimension and many others ” And finally Kurt let go of the upside down position.

“Well, it was a waste of time” his eyes gaze at her leather outfit and there´s a naughty smile “ there better things we can do”

“True, but dinner is ready and Wolverine makes sure we all be present"give a pointed look at Kurt,” He said and I quote ‘If I have to bring the Elf´s ass here I will’ end quote,“ says gently as Kurt doesn´t like to be called Elf.

This new dimension Kurt Wagner and Kurt Darkholme aren´t exactly best friends neither are enemies. Two Germans and one of them is a Catholic and the other is an atheist.

This new dimension has now two Kitty Pryde. One with long curly hair and the other with short curly hair (and an occasional gutless as weapon and accessory.)

"Hate when he calls me elf” Kurt is a bit angry but not as in the first times Wolverine called him like that.

“I know, but he is adamant in calling you elf and me …half print” a swear word, pretty nasty, escape her lips as she gives a mini-speech as why this nickname bothers her.

Well, you´re short. thought Kurt. But the “not” Elf is smart to not say out loud.

Kitty approaches Kurt, for a moment, Kurt Darkholme thought in mention about the catwalk, sadly Kitty does not like puns and she looks too distracting wearing this outfit leather(Is it on purpose? Maybe)

They are facing each other, brimstone and strawberry mixture in the air, gentle and smaller finger are gingerly touching his outfit as she pretends to give bow an invisible tie.

There´s something so domestic, silly and intimate about all this. Kurt doesn’t dare to make cat puns yet.

“I talk with Cable this morning, this dimension Cable, I think, and he told us that Apocalypse won´t come after us,” says gravelly" we´re safe and as for our dimension…it is safe but do you want to come back?“

"To what? There´s nothing for us there anymore and I …I´m so tired” confess with intense in his voice. She nods gentle touching his face(no rebuking or protest, but Kitty always touches him gentle, something so unusual for him) and resume the conversation.

“Kurt, their Bobby will be here as well, remember what we all talk about it?” inquiry Kitty trying to not laugh.

Kurt rolls his eyes and repeats the words he knows by heart.“This Bobby is not evil, don´t kill him or project your hate to an innocent Bobby” and somehow Kurt pouts.

“Good boy” snickers remembering Kurt Wagner and other Kitty along with the others X-men explaining this to Kurt Darkholme.

“And if he is in the dining room?” Kurt asked curiously. They both know how this person is and how much this Kitty wants to avoid him. It is a bad joke, she escapes from one Pete, to immediately found another in this dimension that is just like the other.

“Well, I have my weapon” tries to joke but Kurt has none of this “I´ll be fine Kurt, I promise”

Kurt is not entirely convinced but decides to accept her word. Using his tail wrapped around her(a hey was the only word emitted by Kitty) and with a brimstone smoke, Kitty and Kurt are now in the dining room.

Everyone is in the dining room talking about anything, although Kurt Darkholme will never admit, the sensation of safety and joy that this dimension provides is more than enough for Kurt.

Kurt Wagner and the other Kitty are on a mission. Good news to Darkholme that won´t have to suffer from bad jokes and bible references anymore.

Jubilee seems to be one of the few people that happily chats with the interdimensional couple. Her baby, Shogo Lee, safely tug in the baby carrier as the woman wave to them.

“Good night,” says and it seems her son has the same mood as his mother “Miss Monroe did the cooking and Wolverine helps, which means beer to everyone”

Kurt Darkholme doesn´t know what to say to Jubilee, however, Kitty seems to enjoy talking with the other woman. The young woman´s fangs are easily spotted by anyone and the interdimensional couple often wonder if they should ask how she becomes a vampire.

The conversation carries on, until Kitty spot the chair that Pyotr aka Pete usually sits is empty. It wouldn´t be such a problem if some people could stop giving funny looks to Kitty. As she knows why he is not there.

Kurt Darkholme did notice the funny stares as well. To reward such attempts the “not” Elf thought it would be best to send one of his trademark smiles to the group. It always works like a charm and the little group stopped instantly.

Jubilee notices the funny expressions and soon the mood change abruptly. In an attempt to lighten things up, Jubilee decides to tell her origins.

“Oh, Do I never tell you guys how I become a vampire?” Kurt and Kitty shake their head and if they thought she would be offended, this statement was proved wrong.“Ok, all start with what I like to call: the Ballad of Jubilee”

“Well, thanks for telling us”

“No, problem. By the way, do you guys like music? Because the 0´7 is promoting their new single” says a proud Jubilee with her baby that seems equally proud of said band “is one of the first bands with a full mutant cast and their songs are amazing”

“The only song we did listen on our dimension was the softly sounds of death” Kitty and Jubilee just side eye Kurt “and also, Jimmy Buffet, somehow Jimmy Buffet survive the apocalypse”

The explanation was long and the couple feels like it was a saga with some plot holes, overall, they finally learn how Jubilee turned into a vampire.

And of course, they eat. Bobby sits as far away as possible of Kurt Darkholme that may or may not sound too intimidating on purpose whatever Bobby said or did anything. Again, no one can prove anything.

Wolverine drinks beer. Ororo demonstrates once again one of her many skills, offering a piece of her delicious pie to Kurt and Kitty, and the new kids are chatting about homework and cute boys/girls.

Mr.MCcoy enter the room with a solemn expression and asked Kitty if he could talk with her alone, Kurt may be biased, after all, he did face an evil version of the Beast, but something in this request didn´t settle well with him.

Neither does with Kitty. But after the kind doctor(Kurt and Kitty still are deciding if he is indeed a kind doctor) insists vehemently Kitty agrees and Kurt did follow along.

“Maybe you guys were wondering where´s Pete was in the last few days?” asked Hank McCoy trying to figure out how to explain the situation. To be fair, the Doctor never saw anything remotely alike.

“Not really,” both said in unison.

“Oh” he should expect this answer “well, it seems that Pete is suffering the Hanaki disease” Kurt arch an eyebrow having no idea what this means and Kitty clearly has no idea what is going on.

“It means he will cough petals and dies because of a one-sided love” it was blunt and maybe not the best way to describe or explained, but, again, to be fair, the doctor has no idea of what to say here.

“I´ve some question how someone coughs petals? why one side love? there´s magical users in this dimension…and what that has to do with us?” asked Kitty impatiently.

“Well…I was hoping” couldn´t finish as Kitty give one of her death glare.

“That I would go back to him? I was married to a Pete in my dimension and it was horrible and I don´t wish to repeat the experience, also, this Pete knows the Kitty from this dimension and I think, no, I believe this Pete is settling to the second best”

“Kitty, he will die,” says Hank once again.

“Yeah? well the Pete of my dimension did let thousands of kids being murder, this Pete mentally abuse the Kitty of this universe and if he is going to die coughing petals, then have fun”

“Beside” surprisingly Kurt amends" he is an X-men. Death never got a hold of us. So, maybe a little time out will do good for him"

Kitty refuses to see Pete. And Kurt is ready to assume that this Doctor McCoy is not kind. Maybe, some may think Kitty´s attitude was cold(hence why the funny staring) but the woman decided a long time ago to not repeat the same mistake she did in her own universe.

“This is a time for a new begin,” says tiredly after the dinner, after the meeting with McCoy finally ends, to a disheveled Kurt.

“Yes, I just have one question: How someone coughs petals? Is that the stupidest thing ever or the creepiest?”

“Kurt, we´re X-men I think at this point we just have to let it go from logic, sometimes”

“But, Katzchen, is petals…how petals can kill you?”

“I´ve no idea”

“This is so stupid or maybe creepy”

Pete remains in the hospital alley coughing petals much to Doctor McCoy astonishment and surprise. Soon everyone did found out about the Hanaki disease and no one knows for sure if this is the stupidest thing ever or the creepiest.

[ferrero13]

That Which We Call a Naruto (6/11)

Fic summary

The road to becoming a good Hokage is a long and tedious one. As it turns out, it’s also incredibly confusing — there is no shortage of people who can’t keep track of who he is.

Or, 10 people who didn’t recognise who Naruto was, and one person who did.

Read on AO3

Chapter 6: Civilian Refugee

In which the Seventh Hokage is fond of walking around his village under a transformation.

Kazuha was, in some ways, a little more wary of the new Hokage than most people. The nine-tailed fox had taken her husband and only son from her nearly twenty years ago, and to have its jinchuuriki leading her village was a somewhat…unpleasant idea. Yondaime’s son was not the beast itself, that she knew, but knowing and believing were two very different things.

It had hurt, watching the boy run around the village with that mischievous smile of his. Kazuha’s son could’ve been like that, could’ve been alive. Yondaime may have managed to seal the demon away into his son, but at least the boy hadn’t died. At least he got to grow up, pick up a kunai, and perform his first jutsu.

Sighing, Kazuha tugged the awning so that it extended to shade the bit of the street that was right in front of her shop. The pain had lessened with time, thankfully, but the reminder of what that boy had achieved—Hokage!—where her son never even had the chance was oftentimes the cause of one too many sleepless nights.

“Oh! Kazuha-san!”

Kazuha looked up from where she was pushing a rack into place, the paintings on it swaying a little before coming to rest. “Naoki-san!” she called back, greeting the man who was making his way through the early morning bustle to her shop.

“You’re opening your shop earlier than usual today. Want some help?” Naoki offered. He was a fine young man, the kind of person her husband was, and the kind of person she thought her son could’ve been. He had appeared around the same time war got so bad that Konoha was forced to start receiving refugees, and his unending cheer was something that everyone had been so desperately short of during the war.

She smiled. “If you don’t mind,” she said, gesturing to the racks of paintings still arranged tightly inside the shop, waiting to be pulled out onto the street for display.

“The usual?”

“Yes, thank you.” It was so nice of him, always dropping by. He’d been by often enough that he could probably tell when she sold a painting or put a new one up for sale. The same could be said for all of the other shops along this street, really. Naoki was the highlight of everyone’s morning—she liked to think that he was something of a second sunrise—lending a hand whenever he had time to spare and chatting away like the closet gossip that he was.

“So, Kazuha-san, anything new in your love life recently?” Naoki asked, and she could almost see his eyebrows wiggling even with her back to him.

“What are you talking about? An old woman like me? I’m past the age for youthful dalliances.”

“Ah, but you see, Kazuha-san, Ginbaki-san down the street seems to like you a lot,” Naoki said as he pulled out a rack, arranging it exactly where she would have herself.

Kazuha scoffed. “That old geezer likes every woman who walks past his shop.”

“That’s…not wrong. Ginbaki-san does strike me as the kind of guy who isn’t very picky. How about Testuya-san? He’s been fighting with Ginbaki-san over you a lot lately, ever since you put out that painting of this street with his shop in the corner.”

Kazuha rolled her eyes. “The day I let either one of them touch me is the day I die. But enough talk about me. What about you? Have you found yourself a nice young girl to settle down with yet? Why haven’t I ever heard of you bringing anyone home?”

Now, Kazuha couldn’t claim to be the kind of person who took pleasure regularly from other people’s embarrassment, but watching Naoki turn an earthy shade of red was still better entertainment than watching Ginbaki and Tetsuya bicker two shops down. “Well, I—that is to say, there is someone, but…”

Kazuha felt her eyebrows shoot up. This was new. But then, she hadn’t asked about his relationships before despite having known him for a few years, so maybe it was new only to her. “Really now? Tell me more about this undoubtedly wonderful woman who has stolen your heart.”

Naoki scratched the back of his head in a way that struck Kazuha as vaguely familiar the way the mannerisms of a commonly seen public figure were. “I’ve never known anybody more frustrating. I’m really happy though, even if it still feels like a dream sometimes. I was really lonely until we met, and we probably had the most stupidly ridiculous courtship in all of the elemental nations, but it’s all worth it in the end.”

“Not lonelier than this old woman, surely?”

“Actually, I probably was,” Naoki said, chortling a little. “I didn’t know why but my village was…well, it didn’t like me very much, so I didn’t have friends for a long time. The playgrounds are much better at night anyway—nobody to laugh at your scraped knees,” Naoki joked, but it fell flat when he saw how unamused Kazuha was. He hastily added, “But Konoha is very nice to me right now, and I’m very, very glad that I’m here, so it turned out all right in the end.”

Kazuha frowned. It wasn’t hard to tell that Naoki was giving her a watered down version of things. “I can’t imagine a village disliking a child for no reason, and you’re such a nice young man too. Did you ever find out why?”

“Yeah. Turns out it was something out of my control anyway, so I learned not to care too much. But it wasn’t all bad. I had a really nice teacher, and I eventually made some very good friends. There was also an old man who used to send people to keep an eye on me to make sure I didn’t just end up in a ditch without anyone noticing.”

Kazuha blinked. She could read between the lines well enough and what she saw worried her. What on earth was Naoki’s childhood like, that people had to watch out for him so that he didn’t die? What kind of monsters did the villagers have to be to not care if a child died? But at least Naoki had people who reached out, even if there hadn’t been too many. “Do you miss them?”

“I do miss the old man sometimes. But I’m still in touch with that teacher, and most of my friends are still alive and know where to find me, so I think I’m better off than most people.”

“And you’ve found somebody special, too,” Kazuha said, patting Naoki’s hand gently.

Naoki grinned at her. “Yeah, there’s that as well. I’m really lucky, actually, considering how many of my precious people were active shinobi during the war.”

“You’ve led a hard life. I’m glad you’re not alone anymore.”

“Me too, Kazuha-san. I hope you’ll find the same happiness that I have.”

All was peaceful for a moment, until the sound of people opening their shops was interrupted by somebody yelling at the top of her voice, “Uzumaki Naruto! Where the hell are you?!”

Kazuha sighed, eyeing a pink-haired woman who looked exceedingly irritated. She recognised her as the medic-nin who could sometimes be found nagging the Hokage into taking breaks. For a brief moment, she felt nothing but pity for the Hokage should this woman ever get her hands on him. “Ninja these days don’t know how to keep their voices down.”

Naoki gave a short, awkward laugh. “Seems like people are starting to get up and about. You need help with anything else?”

“No, I can handle the rest on my own. Get going—I don’t want you to be unemployed because I made you late for work.” Come to think of it, what did Naoki do for a living? She hadn’t heard about that either.

“All right. I’ll see you soon, yeah?” Naoki said, walking backwards and waving at her.

“Bring your girl with you next time!” Kazuha shouted.

“Not a chance in hell!” Naoki yelled back, grinning.

Well. It was a long shot anyway. She hadn’t expected it to work.

Kazuha was about to rearrange a couple of paintings when, from of the corner of her eye, she saw Naoki walk up to the woman from earlier who was looking for the Hokage. Curious to know if this was Naoki’s girl, she continued watching as discreetly as she could manage. She had built up her career by being observant, after all, so a little lip-reading was not beyond her.

‘Where have you been?’ the woman hissed. ‘You’re supposed to be in your office, not pretending to be one of your shadow clones. Do you know how hard it is to find you under this stupid henge?’

‘That’s kind of the point?’ Naoki said. ‘Nobody’s supposed to be able to find me.’

‘Look, I don’t normally care if you want to keep an eye on the village, and I actually encourage it even though as your primary physician I should knock you over for sapping an inadvisable amount of chakra. But I expect the real you to be up there, not down here. I don’t want to be killed if he finds you gutted in an alleyway. Leave the wandering to your clones and park your sorry ass on your throne or you’ll never get to wear that hat you like so much again.’

Naoki swallowed visibly, then followed the woman off, his dark hair fading to a familiar shade of blond.

A very familiar shade of blond.

The village Naoki had been talking about hadn’t been some far off, already destroyed pile of rubble after all. And the people who were mean to him, those monsters, they weren’t distant, nameless strangers either.

They were people like Ginbaki, like Tetsuya.

People like Kazuha.

She sat heavily in a chair, staring out onto the street. A little boy ran past her shop, laughing, but instead of seeing her son as she usually did when children passed her by, this time she saw a boy with scars like whiskers on his cheeks.

She remembered that he was a small blond child, far too small for his age. He was laughing, yes, in a way that her son probably would’ve, but there had also been cuts on his face and bruises on his arms, and the clothes he wore were little more than dirty rags. He had caught a head of cabbage tossed at him once and shouted back an obnoxious, “Thank you!” but Kazuha also remembered that the shopkeeper hadn’t thrown the cabbage out of goodwill. It was just a convenient projectile for a vegetable seller.

But the boy just continued to laugh until he turned a corner, leaned against the wall, and let his shoulder sag, shaking as he slowly slid to the ground. For the first time since it happened, she remembered that his eyes were a little red when he finally got up and left, but the brilliant smile on his face—a smile that Kazuha only now realised was hurting him to wear—had easily erased everything else from her mind. It had only been so easy because she hadn’t wanted to acknowledge that she’d seen what she had.

Many things had crossed Kazuha’s observant eyes, but it wasn’t until then that she realised how much of it had gone unnoticed, had been wilfully ignored in order to feed her resentment toward the Hokage, a man willing to protect the people who had once persecuted him. She would like to continue resenting this man who had become a Kage where her son never even had a fighting chance, but it hadn’t all fallen into his lap like a gift like she’d convinced herself it had, and it was hard to be jealous of someone who had to fight tooth and nail for every little bit of kindness.

Kindness that Kazuha hadn’t shown him; kindness that was long overdue.

Uzumaki Naruto—whom she knew as the kind and cheerful Naoki—was a far greater man than she ever knew, and perhaps it was time she started acting like he was her Hokage, not just one in a long line of succession, and not just a ghost of what her son could’ve been. Because, in truth, she was glad that her son never had to live through the abuse that her Hokage suffered at the hands of his village. And if even if he did she didn’t know if he could still find room in his heart to love it enough to want to protect it.

[daniellethamasa]

Hey all, Dani here.

Welcome to the first Calendar Girls post of 2019. What exactly is Calendar Girls? Well, I’m glad you asked. Let’s talk about all those details before I start talking about this month’s theme and all the possible book options.

Calendar Girls is a monthly blog event that was started by Flavia and Melanie, but is now being hosted by Katie and Adrienne. They are all wonderful ladies, and you should check out their lovely blogs. Oh, and if you go to either Katie or Adrienne‘s Calendar Girls post each month, they will have links to all the other wonderful book bloggers participating in this event.

First, more about the Calendar Girls. It is designed to ignite bookish discussions among readers, and was inspired by the 1961 Neil Sedaka song, Calendar Girl.

Just like the song, each month has a different theme. Each blogger picks their favorite book from the theme, and on the first Monday of the month reveals their pick in a Calendar Girls post. Make sure to post back to the hostess’s post, and both Katie and Adrienne will make a master list for the month. The master lists allow everyone to see the other Calendar Girls’ picks and to pop on over to their blogs. Thus, we all get to chat about books and even make some new friends!

Oh, and you don’t have to identify as female to join the Calendar Girls. We welcome readers of all types. So if this sounds like fun for you, join us in all of the fun bookish conversations. All right, let’s go ahead and get to talking about the January theme, and then the runners up and the winner. Forewarning, this is a pretty long post and I talk about quite a few books. Sorry, not sorry. I love books.

The theme for January is…

Happy New Year

2019 Release You’re Most Looking Forward To

Oh man, there are so many 2019 releases that I’m looking forward to…and I know I’m probably missing some great ones too. So, I really look forward to reading all the other posts for this month, just in case there are books that I really should have on my release calendar.

But, for the purposes of selecting a pick for this month, I managed to narrow my options down to 12 books. So I’m going to start with talking about my contenders, and then I’ll have to choose my winner from all of them.

Obviously, most of what I’m excited for is fantasy releases. What can I say? They’re my favorite.

First up is the newest release from Brigid Kemmerer, A Curse So Dark and Lonely, which is coming out January 29th. This is apparently an adaptation of Beauty and the Beast, so I’m definitely excited about it.

Then there is Imprison the Sky by A.C. Gaughen, expected January 22nd. The first book, Reign the Earth, was outstanding, and I’m really curious to see what will happen next, because the magic and the politics were very intriguing.

Obviously, King of Scars by Leigh Bardugo has to make this list. This first installment of a Nikolai centered duology will be released January 29th as well, and I’m hoping for wonderful and diverse characters, plenty of drama and complications, and a romance I can root for.

Next, I have to mention Bloodwitch by Susan Dennard, which will be released on February 12th. Now I just talked about this book a little bit a couple days ago, so I don’t want to say too much this time, but I love all the different witcheries in this series, and I’m happy that this book will have a focus on Aeduan, because he is a fascinating character.

Crown of Feathers by Nicki Pau Preto is a relatively new add to my release calendar, but we’ve been getting a lot more Asian inspired fantasy books these past couple years, and I have been super pleased with pretty much every one I’ve read, so I can’t wait to see what other wondrous reads we get. This book will also be released on February 12th.

Rin Chupeco’s conclusion to The Bone Witch trilogy–The Shadow Glass–is definitely one of my highest anticipated books. I was lucky enough to be granted an e-galley of the first book and an ARC of the second book, but no such luck with this one, so I have been waiting for what feels like forever. I can’t wait to pick this one up March 1st.

I won’t spend much time at all talking about Emily A Duncan’s April 2nd release, Wicked Saints. If you want to know all my gushy feels, go check out my early review for it. But this is a book that makes my D&D cleric loving heart so dang happy. This is definitely a contender for one of my favorite books right now.

When I read Ashley Poston’s Geekerella, I loved all the fandom and charm. So to find that it is getting a sequel/companion just made me super happy. I’m ready to go to another fandom and have more cute geeky interactions. I wish I didn’t have to wait until April 2nd to get my hands on The Princess and the Fangirl.

Kingsbane by Claire Legrand obviously has to make this list, considering how much I loved reading Furyborn last year. I want to know more about these women, this world, and the magic and politics going on. This book will be released May 21st.

I love some good epic fantasy, and I was expecting quite a bit when I read Kill the Queen by Jennifer Estep last year. It didn’t disappoint, but I’m still hoping for more with the sequel, Protect the Prince, expected May 15th. I want more badass gladiator women, and obviously more tantalizing descriptions of food.

Give me more fun and tricks, plus more action, drama and romance, with Soul of the Sword by Julie Kagawa, to be released June 25th. I absolutely adored Shadow of the Fox when I devoured it last year, and I need more of this fantasy adventure with Asian mythology and folklore influences. So good.

Finally, I have The Rise of Kyoshi by F.C. Yee, set to be released on July 16th. This is a book set in the world of Avatar: The Last Airbender, and follows a previous Avatar, namely Earthbender Kyoshi. My fiance introduced me to both Avatar and Korra since we started dating, and I have watched both shows, as well as reading all of the comics. I am so ready to see what we’ll learn with this book series.

Okay, so there are a lot of fantastic options here. And I’ve already realized that I’ve missed a few books. More than a few if I’m being completely honest, but I read a lot of books, so my release calendar is pretty full already. But the more I look at all of these, the more I’m thinking that my choice actually isn’t any of the ones I’ve mentioned already. If this had been the theme a couple months ago, my answer would have been Wicked Saints, but I feel bad picking that now because I already have read it and I know that I absolutely love it. So I can’t really call it an anticipated book any more; all I’m anticipating is having a final edition in my hands.

So I’m going to pick another book, and that’s great. I love getting to talk about even more books than I originally planned. All right, so here is my final choice for this month’s Calendar Girls theme.

I think I need to re-read the first book before I write up the review for it, but the Tales of Pell series is utterly hilarious. It is filled with so many classic fantasy tropes that get turned on their heads, as well as pun after glorious pun. This isn’t a dark or serious fantasy, like some we’ve come to expect, but it is still entirely worth a read.

Based on the summary, I’m thinking No Country for Old Gnomes will be just as entertaining.

Go big or go gnome. The New York Times bestselling authors of Kill the Farm Boy return to the world of Pell, the irreverent fantasy universe that recalls Monty Python and Terry Pratchett.

War is coming, and it’s gonna be Pell.

On one side stand the gnomes: smol, cheerful, possessing tidy cardigans and no taste for cruelty.

On the other side sit the halflings, proudly astride their war alpacas, carrying bags of grenades and hungry for a fight. And pretty much anything else.

It takes only one halfling bomb and Offi Numminen’s world is turned upside down—or downside up, really, since he lives in a hole in the ground. His goth cardigans and aggressive melancholy set him apart from the other gnomes, as does his decision to fight back against their halfling oppressors. Suddenly Offi is the leader of a band of lovable misfits and outcasts—from a gryphon who would literally kill for omelets to a young dwarf herbalist who is better with bees than with his cudgel to an assertive and cheerful teen witch with a beard as long as her book of curses—all on a journey to the Toot Towers to confront the dastardly villain intent on tearing Pell asunder. These adventurers never fit in anywhere else, but as they become friends, fight mermaids, and get really angry at this one raccoon, they learn that there’s nothing more heroic than being yourself.

In No Country for Old Gnomes, Delilah S. Dawson and Kevin Hearne lovingly tweak the tropes of fantasy and fairy tales. Here you’ll find goofy jokes and whimsical puns, but you’ll also find a diverse, feminist, and lighthearted approach to fantasy that will bring a smile to your face and many fine cheeses to your plate.

Come on. Does that not sound like an absolutely hilarious and awesome book? I’m thinking I may actually try to pick this series up in audiobook. I have the hardcover of the first book, but I think this might be a good series to listen to.

I laughed so much while reading Kill the Farm Boy. I’ve read quite a bit of Kevin Hearne, but not much Delilah S Dawson, which is going to change sometime soon-ish. But they have co-authored an amazing series, set in an awesomely put together world, with a random and hilarious cast of characters.

Wow…this post went so much longer than I expected it to. Oh well, there were lots of great books to talk about. That’s all from me today, but I’ll be back soon with more bookish content.

Calendar Girls: January 2019 Hey all, Dani here. Welcome to the first Calendar Girls post of 2019. What exactly is Calendar Girls?

[afangirlsplaylist]

Counsel Me (Day 1: Rhett)

Author: afangirlsplaylist

Rating: Explicit. This chapter is G.

Warnings: None this chapter unless you count angst and emotions. 

Chapter: 2/?

Word Count: 1,816

Summary: When Rhett and Link’s friendship hits a breaking point they turn to a therapist, who proposes a difficult idea. Very loosely prompted by THIS.

Note: Each chapter will be a day of the experiment, focusing on one or both of the guys and how they deal with it.

Read it on archiveofourown

“Can we go a week without each other?” Rhett spoke into the camera, as Link dramatically grasped him in a tight side hug.

"Let’s talk about that!” Link finished

“Mythical beasts we’re gonna be honest. Internetainment is hard.” Rhett admitted. “And sometimes being around someone as much as we are can be a bad idea.”

“A really bad idea. It’s a little unhealthy.” Link added.

“Right. So here’s what we’re going to do.” Rhett explained. “For the next 7 days, we are going to determine whether distance really does make the heart grow fonder by essentially divorcing each other for a week.”

“You’re divorcing me?” Link joked, grinning widely.

“I’m friendship divorcing you Link.” Rhett retorted, lifting his mug to his lips and taking a sip.

Link laughed before turning back to the camera. “The aim is to document the process so there may be a little vlogging involved, maybe some tears or possibly even a video or two from this desk still. I don’t know. The difference is it won’t be with each other.”

“Now before you say anything G/M/M is not going anywhere, okay kids? Your dads are going to be taking a little break but it doesn’t mean we love you any less.” Rhett said, his voice dripping with false sentimentality.

“I don’t know if I wanna call us their dads.” Link said, gesturing at the camera. “It gets a little weird.”

“I’m okay with it.” Rhett shrugged, his cheeks turning pink as a blush crept up them. It wasn’t until he caught Link staring at him in bemusement that he pressed on. “The point is G/M/M will be back to normal the week after next and you’ll still see the both of us.”

“So stop writing that comment! I can see you writing it.” Link interjected.

“It is going to be a little different but it could be a fun experiment.” Rhett said.

“Very different.” Link agreed, stretching his arms across the width of the desk. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with all this desk room.”

“Probably set things on it, or lean on it.” Rhett said sarcastically.

“Maybe.” Link said playfully, before returning to his usual show man tone. “But that’s not what we’re here to find out today. Because today we’re going to talk about some other inseparable friendships as we play…”

I’ll be there for you, even when I probably shouldn’t. They sang in unison, picturing the title card in their heads as they did it.

“I’ve been thinking, and you know we probably shouldn’t go into the business of making parodies.” Rhett joked, stroking his chin in mock thought.

“We should leave it to Weird Al.” Link suggested.

“Leave it to the Yankovitch.” Rhett concurred, watching as Link pulled his laptop towards him.

“Okay I’m going to present you with some facts about the lengths these people went to in order to stay together, and you have to tell me if it’s fact or fiction.” Link instructed. “If you get 5 out of 10 of these right you get a little friendship bracelet I made just for you. Rhett are you ready?”

“Always.” Rhett scoffed.

This time filming went smoothly and without hiccups, several of the stories they told serving as great banter material. All too soon the game was over and the wheel was spinning, the dying whirring of the wheel feeling a little more final than usual.

“Click through to Good Mythical More where we’ll go into more detail about this experiment and I give this guy a bracelet.” Link finished.

Then the wheel stopped spinning.

They were always the last ones left in the studio at the end of a work day but today they seemed to decide, without words, that they were going to drag this one out even further. There was always another email for Rhett to write, another coffee for Link to finish drinking or one last detail the two of them needed to look over before the next week, neither of them wanting to call it a day. It wasn't until Link had read and re-read a message from Stevie a dozen times that he finally accepted it was time to go home. 

Walking up behind Rhett’s chair he wrapped his arms around him in a hug, resting his head on the taller man's shoulders. "Time to go brother."

Rhett tensed up for a second but soon relaxed, placing a hand on top of Link’s hands on his chest. "Can we just forget the whole thing?"

"Sorry, no." Link chuckled, pulling his arms away. “We’re locked in."

“Fine let’s get this over with.” Rhett conceded.

For two people who'd spent the better part of the month screaming at each other the ride to Rhett's house was pretty quiet. They'd already been sitting in front of the McLaughlin house for several moments before Link remembered - crap goodbyes aren't a thing for us. He opened his mouth to try anyway but was saved the trouble by Rhett opening the door, getting out like he was ripping off a band-aid. He acknowledged his friend with nothing more than a little wave as he went inside the house, but Link understood. Changing as little of their normal as possible was a comfort to both of them. So he drove away and took care not to look back.

Unfortunately, the band-aid technique wasn't much help to Rhett at all when the dawn of the first day arrived, shaking up his routine before he even rolled out of bed. There were a few things Rhett could count on every weekday morning. The lively sounds of his sons as they woke up in the other room, several unread emails, and texts from Jessie and Link. Having one of those things missing made him feel unbalanced and wrong already, a feeling that was not improved as grabbed his phone to delete Link’s contact.

It was a temporary measure for the week that he’d come up with himself, necessary even if he didn’t like it. They’d both had each other’s numbers memorized for as long as they could remember but Rhett never half-assed something like this. Technically he could give into temptation and add Link’s number back in any time, but not having the name taunting him from his phone would be helpful anyway. So he pressed the delete contact button before he had the chance to change his mind, sending three identical texts to Stevie, Jessie and Christy right after.

The experiment has started.

He was already regretting taking the first day at the studio by the time he walked in the door. He was immediately swarmed with demands and conversation by everyone from Stevie to Alex, to the point where he’d probably need one more of him even if Link was there. He handled it for two hours before he had to tell Stevie to take the reigns, shutting himself in the office till filming. 

His first thought was their office looked big when he had it all to himself, which was saying a lot coming from him. He had a brief, wild thought of stealing one of the snickers Link always had stashed for stress emergencies, but thought better of it when he saw the tirade of emails waiting for him. It loomed like a weight that would only get heavier if he ignored it, so he parked himself in his seat to work through them. 

He was only just getting into the swing of it before a knock on the door interrupted him.

“Come in!” He said without turning around. 

Chase walked in at his invitation, wearing a budget imitation of Link’s glasses, a plaid button up shirt and a fair amount of mythical pomade in his hair. It was styled into a high, sweeping updo that was an accurate impression of Link’s aside from the lighter colour. “You needed to confirm this?”

Immediately falling into business mode Rhett turned in his chair to see what his employee was talking about.

“Chase no.” He said, looking at the sight as if wounded.

Chase frowned, looking down at himself. “Is the shirt too much?”

“You need stilts.” Rhett quipped, chuckling as Chase rolled his eyes.

His gaze followed Chase as the shorter man left the room, focusing on the back of the very Link’ish shirt like it was a comfort blanket. It took him a moment to shake himself out of that feeling, silently cursing himself for coming up with this episode idea. He’d thought it would be funny to film with Chase doing a silly imitation of his friend, but there were two problems. One - Link was going to kill both of them when he saw it and two - it was the least funny thing in the world to him right now. More stressed out than ever, he gave up and went to grab one of Link’s snicker’s anyway, figuring this warranted it. 

The bracelet Link had placed on his wrist during yesterday’s G/M/More caught his eye as he ate, and he took the time to admire it properly. It was a black and orange piece to match their mugs that Link seemed to have put together with cord and a strap. It was tribal, masculine and simple in design, seeming to fit him and his wrist perfectly.

He couldn't help but imagine Link sitting in this room putting it together, probably still feeling residual emotions from therapy but never too much for them and their work. The image was too easy to picture, and the ghostly feeling of it all quickly became too much for him. So he took it off, storing it safely in a little box in his desk for now. He doubted he’d be able to wear it again until the week was over.

For the rest of the day, it was probably the little things that Rhett missed the most. In fact, it surprised him how quickly he noticed it. He managed to film a vlog before the episode, but found himself off center in the frame, constantly turning to his right because he was so used to another body filling the space. After filming he sought the company of the crew for lunch, but it was still far too quiet without the sound of excessively loud chewing to fill the air.

Together he and Link had put an exhaustive amount of work into making this crew a family, a lot more than the beasts could ever guess at. But the fact of the matter was they weren’t Link. No one was Link. No one could be Link. No one, aside from his wife, made him laugh or feel the way his friend did, whether it was joy or intense anger. Even the anger, as horrible and destructive as it had been lately, was still intense and part of something he desperately needed in his life.

No one at the studio was as easy to talk to either, his brain added helpfully. Nor did anyone have eyes as blue or hips as -

...Shit.

Notes: Oops that’s a lot of description. Sorry! 

[dreamscript]

HEY IT ME AGAIN-- LITERALLY SAME I GOT SICK AND LIKE IM STILL COUGHING AND I WANT IT TO STOP. LIKE. RIGHT. NOW. I hope you feel better soon! I can only imagine how bad you're suffering! Make sure to get lots of rest and binge watch Naruto hehehehe// I got sick around Christmas so it's kinda just here// But yeah lol just excuse me late responses (; 7 ; ) and yas girl just embrace you're inner otaku its okay xD (i wanna re-read Naruto actually//) OMG YES PLZ I LOVE YOUR FICS AND-

{CONT} YO HOW DARE YOU WRITE THAT JUNGKOOK FIC IM SHOOKED JKSDFNKJD// LMAO IF THAT AINT ME IN ANY MATH CLASS FUKFFKFKKFKF BUT ITS OKAY YOU CAN DO IT I BELIEVE IN YOU! There was freezing rain here a day or so ago. That was fun . u . (sobs) IF YOU COULD TWEEK MY BLOG OMG ID LOVE THAT. But the theme isn’t originally mine and I’d assume the original owner wouldn’t want the original code changed?

{CONT} IDK I wanted to change my theme for a while now // Something not endless scroll but just boxes for previews? Also I wanted a minimalistic theme based with pastel colours and black and white hehe/ ANYWAY NO NO WORRIES SOMETIMES IM JUST HERE WONDERING IF YOONGI SUED BIGHIT FOR DYING HIS HAIR TOO FREQUENTLY AND NOW HE BALD (LOL) BUT YEAH APPARENTLY THEY ARE SUPPOSE TO HAVE A COMEBACK IN FEBRUARY AND MY WALLET IS UPSET. I ALSO WANT THE NEW ARMY STICK FOR NO GOOD REASON AT ALL LOL

{CONT 3 xD} I’ve only read Naruto Manga so if you wanna screech with me about that lets do it ahaha/ HECK YES I WILL READ THEIR FIC- I WILL NOT STUDY JAHAJSDSDKJF Shout out to Cat and Fae too like i seriously love their fics- your Christmas series had me shooked!! Anyways I have so much work to do and so i will bother you later :) - Sakura !

IM HEALED AND BETTER NOW THANK YOU I HOPE YOU’RE FINE NOW TOO??!?! but i remember my doctor telling me once that if you’re still coughing like a month later you should get it checked out or something D:

and oh. my. god.

naruto.

LISTEN I LITERALLY CRY EVERYTIME IT MAKES ME SO EMO. I WATCHED NARUTO THE ROAD TO NINJA MOVIE LIKE TWO NIGHTS AGO AND I CRIED LIKE A BABY WATCHING HIM INTERACT WITH HIS PARENTS AND ALL LIKE D’:: highkey still hated on sasuke though

but yeah no it’s okay! i have super late responses as of late…. and it’s really only because i’ve been too emotionally spent by the end of the day or tired or busy or just “not feeling it”

idk, but i hope to get back into being more active. i miss this place. i miss interacting with others, as little of it i seem to be doing right now (guh _ _)

LOL I HAVE SO MANY SEX SCENES ALREADY PREWRITTEN OUT FOR HTE JUNGKOOK FIC AND SO NOW THAT I’VE GOT THE HARDEST PARTS DONE, IT’S JUST DOWN TO FILLING IN THE PLOT AND SUCH. aaaand that’s kinda hard too, but i think i’ll manage. hopefully.

(help)

dude it was rainy and windy and cold today and i had to go outside and the entire time i was walking/running/dying to class i was thinking a) why b) this was a Mistake

ah well in regards to your theme, usually the theme makers are okay with minor changes (sometimes major ones too) as long as you keep the credit and the changes are for personal use (as opposed to commercial use/redistribution, etc). just to be sure, you can just check their rules. they usually have that whole page/pop up or will simply include it in their theme code.

hmm what do you mean by boxes for previews? i don’t think i’ve ever seen such as thing. it sounds interesting, though. are they previews for like posts or…?

YEAH OMG I’M REALLY EXCITED BECAUSE FEBRUARY IS BOTH MINE AND ALSO @taesthetes​‘ BIRTHDAY MONTH SO ITS LIKE A BIRTHDAY PRESENT WOOHOO

thank you for loving our collaboration! i’m still amazed on how quickly we got things put together and everything… honestly… cat and @zephyoongist​ are so talented i don’t know what i’m doing here :’) (or where i would be without them)

and now finally…

(for the maaaain event)…

okaY OKAY I WILL SCREECH WITH YOU ABOUT NARUTO. RIGHT HERE. RIGHT NOW. just under the cut because spoilers:

I’M SUCH AN EMOTIONAL WRECK OVER NARUTO THE ONLY BEST WAY I CAN TRULY EXPRESS MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS AT THE MOMENT IS JUST THROUGH BULLET POINTS SO:

i love kakashi

i also love gaara. i can’t choose between the two, but lately i’ve been more biased towards kakashi. i blame it on my sister because she’s always had a thing for him

(i still love you gaara its okay my sand child)

kakashi’s backstory had me in tears… like… with obito died and he’s telling kakashi he’ll give him his sharingan (the sharingan that he’d always been talking about that would get him to hokage) to be his eye to see the future…

i just..

fucking broke down man like dude… stop… you’re killing me here… and then how kakashi really changes afterwards

(okay but listen child kakashi was savage as fuck though and it was hilarious)

(also i know it’s a filler but that one episode in which it showed guy and kakashi comparing dick sizes as kids….,,..,.

….,,..i wasn’t expecting that at all but i don’t mind the info heheheheh heh /dies)

OKAY BUT THEN RIN DIES WHY

literally if she hadn’t died a lot of the issues in naruto wouldn’t have occurred but they fucking did

no i’m not blaming her she died for a noble reason okay it just makes me really sad i’m sorry

AND FINALLY MINATO DIES TOO AND KAKASHI IS THE LAST OF HIS TEAM IM EMO

on a side note minato and kushina were cute as fuck

ANYWAYS GAARA OH MY OH MY GOD MY POOR BABY as a kid he was so cute and just wanted some friends and was out helping all those villagers and such but then his damned dad just had to go and screw those things up like STOP IT HE;S MY CHILD

even though i love those two, my favorites are actually the akatsuki

like. they hate each other but istg they secretly love each other like have you seen kakuzu and hidan’s interactions??? they tease and insult and threaten (and have killed) each other but kakuzu is actually patient with hidan’s rituals and such, and hidan will still accompany kakuzu to the collection centers

also, when he sees asuma’s guardian shinobi thing the first thing that comes to mind is kakuzu and how he’d want him for the money and he’s like u gh but like !!!

and AND when hidan at first thinks he’s accidentally killed kakuzu in his fight with shikamaru & co., he has that look of panic ooooh my god I JUST GASHUDFJSDIJASD

also hidan is just hilarious. like when they go to recruit him he’s like “who are you guys, all wearing the same clothes?? are you guys an orchestra or band or something?”

/points at kakuzu/ bet you play the bass

/points at konan/ bet the girl does vocals and keyboards

/points at itachi/ …or do you do vocals…?

and then the first thing hidan and kakuzu do to each other is kill each other

the look of utter disbelief on both of their faces

“what the–why aren’t you dead?”

“bitch that hurt–wait. why aren’t you dead?”

but anyways we can’t forget about itachi and kisame either, now can we?? like. they are actually like the only partner group that openly got along with each other, and they were sad oh my god they were sad upon realizing each other’s death’s

and idk just the way kisame says “itachi-san” does something to me

 i t a c h i

oh boy i have so much to say about this kid

but before i move on i must! address! the others!!

okay so like deidara is actually op as fuck and sometimes idk i feel like he doesnt get enough credit?? idk.

BUT LIKE LISTEN OKAY HE GOES THREE DAYS AND THREE NIGHTS TO SEAL THE ICHIBI AKA SHUKAKU AKA GAARA’S TAILED BEAST and then immediately after decides to take on naruto (and kakashi)

AND HE ONLY HAD ONE ARM AT THE TIME HAVING JUST LOST ONE IN HIS FIGHT WITH GAARA LIKE WHAT IS THIS STAMINA AND HOW DOES HE NOT BLEED OUT THIS KID IS FUCKING AMAZING WHAT THE HELL

and he’s 19 like lol what bye

but anyways, after his “fight” he loses his other arm because kakashi and now he’s armless BUT THIS KID STILL HOLDS HIS OWN though completely on the defense AGAINST TEAM GAI LIKE WHAT THE FUCK HE’S AMAZING and then he manages to create a bomb without using any sort of handseals and fools them all into thinking he’s dead

like

i love this boy give him a metal why did he have to die so early why (yet another reason why i dislike sasuke lmfao)

black zetsu scares the fuck out of me (esp when i learned of his true past and intentions) but white zetsu!! he’s such a sweetie holy shit

I JUST REALLY LIKED THAT TIME WHEN HE BURSTS INTO THE 5 KAGE SUMMIT AND HE’S LIKE “HALLLLOOO!!!!!!” WITH THE ARMS AND EVERYTHING DAW OMG

and also unlike so many others he actually likes everyone and when he saves deidara he’s like “you’re a fun guy to be around” and then and then later when he’s talking to tobi he reveals that he’s sad that so many of the akatsuki members died like D::

let’s not forget when black zetsu called him weak (they had split in two at the time) and white zetsu just kind of D: and wilts a little like ooHH NO oo baby it’s okay it’s okay

ahem

konan is so strong… holy crap… like… her ultimate attack? with the bajillion paper explosive tags disguised as a lake?? that go off for 10 minutes? holy fuck.

yahiko’s pretty damn hot if you ask me (yes i know he’s a cadaver in the main time period but listen)

idk my favorite arc of the entire thing was pain’s invasion of konoha… like from the moment jiraiya’s message arrived to when everyone got revived…. and then kakashi almost became hokage…

it was fantastic

i think it’s mainly because it was a mystery, race against time, battle thing all in one and it was so neat i guess

also you could see everyone in the village working together, fighting their hardest, showing their potentials for like, the first time ever

um um um okay sasori mentally scarred me as a child, and now whenever i hear the rattling puppet noises i immediately think of these scary nightmares i had after watching his fight with sakura… yeah, puppets scare me a lot now

orochimaru is a creep ‘nuff said moving on

tobi! i love this alternate ego of obito/”madara” like idk he’s so jumpy and honestly it’s fucking hilarious watching him because he’s so secretly op certain people underestimate him at first (and then others overestimate him because of his association with akatsuki)

like. when he was warding off konoha from itachi vs sasuke’s fight (which i am still emo about) he was just like playing whack-a-mole with them and then he’s like lemme use this ability! frill-necked lizard!

and they all kinda stand and stare at him intensely execting something legit

but in reality that’s it. the extent of htat ability is just him hanging upside down with the cloack falling behind him to look like a frill-necked lizard

and it’s fucking hilarious

i also thought it was fucking adorable when he and deidara first confront sasuke

and the little bitch goes ahead and slices through him

literally through him

and HE MAKES THE MOST ADORABLE NOISE BEFORE FALLING FLAT ON HIS FACE GAH

but sasuke thinks that he actually killed him and sasuke’s all like “one down”

and deidara just kinda

ugh this kid

and tobi gets up and brushes himself off like wow that was rly fast!!! and sasuke just >:/

URM OKAY ENOUGH ABOUT THE AKATSUKI MEMBERS

sorry i thought i should make this clear but i lowkey highkey have this vendetta thing against sasuke like this little shit

i mean ofc i know the reason for his disillusionment really isn’t all his fault like @ itachi really?

like really when he goes back to konoha and sasuke tries to kill him… he goes and easily breaks his wrist

and he kinda just considers him for a moment like

…hm

how about i….. make his situation even worse…?

and then traps him in a genjutsu that forces him to relive their parents death for 24 hours like why the fuck this is literally all your fault

and also on a side note, fuck danzo. why the fuck did the 3rd not kill him when he was supposed to. why. all the wrong people lived for far too long.

anyways

but yeah no idk i just really don’t like sasuke after he defected and became a Vengeful Teen

AND ITACHI’S STORY MAKES ME CRY EVERY TIME HOLY SHIT IT MAKES ME SO SAD WHY DID THIS BOY HAVE TO SUFFER SO MUCH and then mess up his little brother’s psyche to the point in which he starts killing like everyone wtf

AHEM

another favorite moment arc of mine is the very beginning

like the first 15ish episodes

IRUKA SENSEI

he’s such a blessing. he’s literally one of those crucially important side characters and i appreciate him and i love him and it would’ve been nice to see more of him, but hey, that’s okay too.

(his part in the naruto road to ninja movie had me in tears. like at the end. fucking tears.)

like naruto and kakashi may be super close and stuff, but when he needs someone as a guardian, naruto turns to iruka and idk i feel that says a lot about their relationship and it makes me cry all the fucking time

um anyways yes i also love zabuza

he’s so strong and empowered

AND THAT WHOLE ARC MADE ME CRY A LOT TOO AND THE FACT THAT IT BECOMES SUCH AN IMPORTANT PART OF THE STORY MAKES ME SO FUCKING HAPPY

i have a lot more the say probably but it’s getting late and i need to take a shower and sleep and get up early in the morning to make food so i’ll just leave it at that

(i wrote a lot i know i’m sorry)

(hope i didn’t blow you away with any spoilers D:)

[ciathyzareposts]

Missed Classic 83: Asylum II (1982) – Introduction

Written by Will Moczarski

Introduction: Prelude to a Sequel

Asylum must have been a major success for Med Systems Software, as the team of company president William F. Denman jr. and Frank L. Corr jr. teamed up once more about one year later to program its sequel, simply called Asylum II. The original version of this game seems to have been written – once more – for the TRS-80, and the game marks several forks in the road for Med Systems Software: It was the last game by both Denman and Corr as well as the last adventure game they developed in-house. They published three more games by Jyym Pearson but apart from that, the following years saw only re-releases and re-packagings, mostly of their short-lived Asylum brand. Asylum II, in particular, was confusingly re-released as simply Asylum for the Commodore 64 and the Atari computers in 1986. This was the game that made me first encounter Screenplay, the company formerly known as Med Systems Software, and the desire to go back and play through it gave me the idea for this whole marathon.

Asylum II has the same graphics and the same plot as its predecessor – once again, you are a mental patient who needs to escape from the asylum before he goes “insane.” Both the asylum and the game’s concept of “insanity” have a b-movie feel and don’t even make an effort to come across as realistic. If you haven’t read my other three playthroughs of Med Systems’ trademark “Continuum” games (Deathmaze 5000, Labyrinth, Asylum), you may be surprised at the wireframe 3D graphics that apparently challenged Sierra’s claim to have released the first graphic adventure with Mystery House in 1980. However, these games evolved from a different tradition – that of 3D maze games, a viable mainframe genre that first came into contact with the yet-undeveloped genre of the adventure game in the famous Hunt the Wumpus and its many clones. The “Continuum” games thus progressively qualify more and more as adventure games – while the plot of this latest iteration is not very complex, there are some notable NPC encounters as well as actual puzzles apart from geographical ones. I have very mixed feelings about this game as I kind of enjoyed Asylum but it took me a very, very long time to solve it and I had to resort to a hint sheet in the end. As my memory of the game’s Commodore 64 port is more than hazy, I don’t really know what to expect. Sometimes that’s a good sign, though, innit?

The highest art is no art, the highest form is no form, the biggest surprise is no surprise?

The first two hours of Gameplay

As the other “Continuum” games largely started out as mapping exercises, I figure that this game will be no different, and I’m right. I start out in a small cell and as soon as I make a move, I am told that I should have looked behind me because objects are sometimes hidden in devious places. At least the game acknowledges its own cruelty – I think that may count as a step in the right direction. When I turn around, I find a nut fork which serves as a key for quite a few doors in the starting maze. I open my cell door with it and start my escape.

Two doors down there’s an inmate I can free by applying the nut fork to his door, too. He’s quite helpful, too, as he tells me that the goal of the game is to escape through the exit marked “doctors only” – but it will be necessary to look like a doctor, “wear a doctor’s coat, maybe.”

It’s Meta Man!

I see where this is headed – hopefully, there will be no cat hair camouflaging involved. Beyond the fellow inmate’s cell (who runs away screaming after having provided me with the necessary information) the maze proper begins. I spend about an hour mapping the beast which turns out to be 23 by 18 squares. Along the way, I find several things. For your convenience, I will just spare you a rundown of my painstakingly slow progress and rather tell you about the hotspots:

a. There is a very long corridor (18 squares long) on the western side of the maze. The previous game had one, too, and I vaguely remember being chased by a race car there. I walk its entire length several times but nothing happens – maybe there’s no puzzle here this time around.

b. I find two teleporters that spit me out on the diagonally opposite side of the maze, respectively. It’s more painful to find and map them this time as you can still see your dropped items from the other side of the maze. Still, they were not too difficult to figure out.

c. Next to the very long corridor there is a succession of doors. I can open all but one of them and find several items there: a bird costume, a bean bag, a stethoscope, and a steel key. The steel key doesn’t open any of the doors in this maze – so far it’s (seemingly) useless.

d. There is a pay phone in one of the dead ends in the mid-eastern portion of the maze. When I examine it, I am told that it also has a receiver but I can’t seem to interact any further with either.

e. I find an axe in the southeastern part of the maze. When I pick it up, someone builds a wall behind me and traps me in a small portion of the labyrinth. This is not too bad, though. I can use the map to find the place where the fresh wall must be located and smash it with my newly-found axe. Also, I stumble upon an electrician with a sign. The sign tells me to “look up” and if I follow suit, I am crushed to death by a cartoonish piano dropping from the ceiling. I can also kill the electrician with the axe and he leaves behind a fuse.

f. The northeastern portion of the maze is entirely made up of a circular structure with twenty doors, ten on each side of a long corridor. I can open each of them but don’t find anything behind them. However, I can hear someone running around and slamming doors in the distance. After some experimenting, I find that I can lock the doors with my steel key. This is a rather painful endeavour as you have to lock all twenty doors to achieve anything, and at almost every turn the other inmate (I assume) slams the doors, making me read the message time and again. I have to doubt the reason behind this design choice, as this is neither a puzzle nor a fun obstacle but rather an unnecessary chore. However, after having locked all of the doors, the inmate (I assume) can’t run away anymore and I can hear him bang into one of the doors somewhere in the distance. Strangely, I don’t encounter him but he leaves behind a candle and some matches.

I don’t recall ever hating an NPC I never even saw this much!

g. There are two doors on the north and south walls of the maze. I cannot open the one to the north but the one to the south leads me to another part of the asylum which offers a bit more content.

In my second session, I explore the second part of the asylum which seems to be made up of a hexagonal structure. Once again, my knowledge of Asylum is helpful as that game had a pentagonal structure. I don’t know how to properly map it in Excel, so I translate it into a flat layout. Neither the nut fork nor the steel key is of any use here but I can enter three of the many, many rooms without a key.

First up is the psychiatry from which I can hear “psychiatric mumblings.” If I enter, the psychiatrist literally talks me to death – I die of boredom and have to start over. As control is taken away from me as soon as I enter the room, I assume that there is nothing else to be done here. Behind another door, there is the electro-shock room. This doesn’t sound good, and indeed I get strapped down immediately when I enter (I assume) and after the “therapy” I am returned to my cell. As I can’t do anything here, either, this may just be a handy shortcut. The third door is marked “surgery”, and I meet a rather friendly surgeon there. He regretfully tells me that he can’t help me, though, as he doesn’t have any drugs for the anasthesia. A bit further down the corridor, I find a door marked “doctors only” and get excited just reading that. Unsurprisingly, I cannot unlock it yet.

Now this is where I’m stuck for a while and I tend to blame the game for it. Having run out of things to do, I return to some points of interest like the pay phone or the very long corridor but nothing happens. Then, suddenly, I find a gold key just lying there in the middle of the first maze. Did I overlook it on my first mapping excursion? Truth is, I didn’t. I restore back to verify this, and after some experimentation I discover that the key only appears after I have entered the hexagonal structure and returned to the first maze, and this even only if I have freed the inmate. What a cruel move! Ninety minutes into the game, my trust is already gone.

The gold key brings about some progress: I can unlock another door to the west of the maze and find some circuits behind it. Maybe this has something to do with the electroshock therapy? I try to fumble with the circuits but to no avail. At this point, I have actually solved this problem (in my next play session) but I will keep the solution to myself until next time. Let’s make this another parser game, then: What did I have to do to manipulate the circuits?

I can also enter the room next to my cell now – I find a rocket belt there and immediately guess what this is for: the very long corridor. This seems to be right but once again, I’ll tell you all about it next time. Thirdly, I can unlock three more doors in the hexagonal structure: a film set where I get chased out by a “mad movie producer”; the scientist’s room where I encounter someone who needs “a battery, magnet and some copper” (my first quest!); and the room marked “doctors only” – but of course I don’t look like a doctor (yet) and one of the guards spots me right away: “an escapee! Take him to electro-shock!” This also confirms that I play as a “he”, quite unnecessarily (for a game with a first-person perspective) determining my gender.

   My Excel map so far.

Stay tuned for more (mis)adventures in the wacky asylum and don’t forget to guess the score! The first part got a healthy 32 points.

Session time: 2.5 hours Total time: 2.5 hours

Note Regarding Spoilers and Companion Assist Points: There’s a set of rules regarding spoilers and companion assist points. Please read it here before making any comments that could be considered a spoiler in any way. The short of it is that no CAPs will be given for hints or spoilers given in advance of me requiring one. As this is an introduction post, it’s an opportunity for readers to bet 10 CAPs (only if they already have them) that I won’t be able to solve a puzzle without putting in an official Request for Assistance: remember to use ROT13 for betting. If you get it right, you will be rewarded with 20 CAPs in return. It’s also your chance to predict what the final rating will be for the game. Voters can predict whatever score they want, regardless of whether someone else has already chosen it. All correct (or nearest) votes will go into a draw.

Med Systems Marathon Overview:

(a) 1980 Summary [P1] (b) Reality Ends (1980) [P1] [P2] (c) Rat’s Revenge [P1] / Deathmaze 5000 (1980) [P1] [P2] [P3] [P4] (d) Labyrinth (1980) [P1] [P2] [P3] (e) Asylum (1981) [P1] [P2] [P3] [P4] (f) Microworld (1981) [P1] [P2] (g) The Institute (1981) [P1] [P2]

Jyym & Robyn Pearson Mini-Marathon Overview:

(a) Curse of Crowley Manor (1981) [P1] [P2] (b) Escape from Traam (1981) [P1] [P2] (c) Earthquake – San Francisco 1906 (1981) [P1] [P2] (d) Saigon: The Final Days (1981) [P1] [P2]

source http://reposts.ciathyza.com/missed-classic-83-asylum-ii-1982-introduction/

[daniellethamasa]

Hey all, Dani here.

We have reached the beginning of a new month, and before I can really focus on the road ahead, it is worth taking a look behind to see what all I’ve accomplished so far in 2020. Honestly these wrap-ups really help to reinforce that I actually am doing a lot. Sometimes I feel like I suffer from impostor syndrome and feeling like I’m not doing all that much.

So, in January I forgot to continue with the wrap-up format that I had established last year, where I talked about the progress I made each month towards my personal yearly goals. When I realized that a day or two after the post went up, I thought about going in and editing it, but decided against it. I’m not going to forget it this month, but I also feel like I don’t want to skip over my accomplishments in January, so I’m going to discuss both months this time around.

Reading: I have completed 46 books so far this year, which is pretty great. I’m already thinking my goal of reading 125 books will have to be edited in a few more months, but we’ll see what happens. Anyway, I read 23 books in January and 23 books in February, so I’m pretty darn happy with that. Yes, there was more of my February TBR that I hoped to get through, but I still accomplished quite a bit.

Blogging: I have blogged every single day so far this year, which is incredible, and I still have quite a large list of reviews and other posts I need to write. While drafting up this post I looked at my list of posts to write and if I just posted once a day without reading a single new book, I could probably still have posts for at least two months, which seems baffling to me. So, I suppose for the foreseeable future I’m going to have to try and post up a bonus post or two each week.

Writing: Oh man, I pretty much failed on the writing front this month; I mean, unless you count the blogging, because I did manage quite a few words on the blog. I have thought about writing, and I guess technically I have done a lot of mental writing, which is worth nothing in reality, but at least I have more of my book thought out.

Conventions: Well, we got our hotel room booked for Gen Con this summer, and we’re getting things together for Lexington Comic & Toy Con at the end of March, so that should be a pretty darn good time.

All right, well let’s go over everything that I’ve read this month. If I have the review up already, then I will include a link to the post.

Fruits Basket, Collector’s Edition Vol 3 by Natsuki Takaya — 4.5 stars

A Queen in Hiding by Sarah Kozloff — 4.5 stars

Infinity Son by Adam Silvera — 4 stars

The Unwilling by Kelly Braffet — 5 stars

The Killing Moon by N.K. Jemisin — 5 stars

The Warrior Heir by Cinda Williams Chima — 4 stars

The Unspoken Name by A.K. Larkwood — 4.5 stars

Firefly: Big Damn Hero by James Lovegrove — 3.5 stars

My Hero Academia, Volume 23 by Kohei Horikoshi — 4.5 stars

Snug by Catana Chertwyd — 5 stars

Foul is Fair by Hannah Capin — 4 stars

Looking for Group Omnibus (Vol 1-3) by Ryan La and Lar DeSouza — 5 stars

Is it Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon? Volume 4 by Oneida — 4.5 stars

How to Treat Magical Beasts, Volume 4 by Kaziya — 5 stars

Prince Freya Volume 1 by Keiko Ishihara — 3.5 stars

Vox Machina Origins II #5 by Jody Houser, Matthew Mercer, Ariana Maher, Msassyk, and Olivia Samson — 5 stars

Dragonfly in Amber by Diana Gabaldon — 4 stars

Fatal Throne by Candace Fleming, M.T. Anderson, Jennifer Donnelly, Stephanie Hemphill, Deborah Hopkinson, Linda Sue Park, and Lisa Ann Sandell — 4.5 stars

The Missing of Clairdelune by Christelle Dabos — 4.5 stars

Fruits Basket Collector’s Edition, Volume 4 by Natsuki Takaya — 4.5 stars

The Magician King by Lev Grossman — 4 stars

The Kobold Guide to Worldbuilding edited by Janna Silverstein — 4 stars

Sword of Destiny by Andrzej Sapkowski — 5 stars

Okay, with the wrap-up portion over, I guess it’s time to talk about book haul and book unhaul, and then OwlCrate unboxing. My book unhaul isn’t very big at the moment, so I’ll be holding onto these books a little longer until I have enough to make for a worthwhile trip to Half-Price Books.

Now, for the book haul, I definitely caught up with the extra books I hadn’t bought in the past couple of months, but that’s okay, because I’ve picked up some great books. A few of them I’ve already finished reading, and a few of them are ones I plan to read quite soon. And a couple of them are a little bit out of my normal reading comfort zone, so I am very much looking forward to giving them a try.

Then there’s the OwlCrate unboxing, and this might be my favorite OwlCrate box so far. There are so many items I love in this one. The OwlCrate edition cover for the book is absolutely stunning. There is a set of best friend bookmarks inspired by the Witchlands series by Susan Dennard. I absolutely adore the bento box inspired by the Mistborn series by Brandon Sanderson. And, obviously, as a huge fan of the Something Dark and Holy trilogy from Emily A Duncan, I love the art on the cloth wipe for digital screens we’ve been given. The edges of the playing cards are very shiny, and I guess it’s always nice to have an extra deck of cards. There’s also a sampler for the new Cassandra Clare book (that I won’t be reading just yet because I am a few books behind on the Shadowhunters books).

Finally, I guess I need to talk about my March TBR. I already talked about some of the reads in my Middle Grade March post a couple days ago, but I also want to talk about the books I have picked up for Monstrous March, hosted by Kathy at Books & Munches. Because these plans are a bit ambitious, especially with everything else I’m hoping to accomplish this month. Some of these books are filled with monsters and some are monstrously sized, but all of them are ones I’m looking forward to reading (or re-reading in the case of Nevernight).

Well, that is all for now, but I will be back soon with more bookish content.

February Wrap-Up and March TBR Hey all, Dani here. We have reached the beginning of a new month, and before I can really focus on the road ahead, it is worth taking a look behind to see what all I've accomplished so far in 2020.