#i say i don't engage very much because like. sometimes i will if the topic is important to me

[physicallyimprobable]

Alright so yes, this does seem like a fake story (unfortunately) but personally I was most interested by comments saying that it was made by AI, since the prose seemed human enough to me. Fortunately, one commenter (@bsidetrack) was kind enough to link this YouTube video which gave some tips, so I decided to try them out on the story above. And of course arrange them in a list, because that's who I am. The numbering is according to the video, with sub-items added whenever I felt like it.

How To Spot LLM Reddit Engagement Bait

None of these points are diagnostic, which makes sense because you, a human, can literally just Write Like This if you want to. These are just all things that add credence to the hypothesis that a post was written with LLM. In particular, multiple people pointed out in the comments of the video that folks with the 'tism tend to do a lot of these, and indeed are more likely to be falsely accused of being LLMs.

(Also I'm using the term LLM because I'm tired of people conflating all AI with this garbage.)

Good grammar and syntax. Even spacing, starting letters of sentences are capitalized, clauses are correctly separated, etc. Not really evidence for an LLM so much as lack of evidence against an LLM. Plenty of humans (including myself) do their best to write with proper grammar. Predictive text models, however, find it difficult to speak with obviously-bad grammar. I like the analogy used in the video: "Averaging the output of the entire internet to generate a Reddit post reduces mistakes, the same way that averaging the faces of a bunch of people returns a face that is more symmetrical than most individual faces." 1a. Inconsistent grammar and syntax. The definitions for "correct" grammar differ with cultures, but a given person will usually use a single convention, while an LLM will flip between correct conventions at random. The most common examples are switching between dash sizes and changing the way quotation marks interact with other punctuation. This post doesn't really do any of that, though; all of the quotation marks are the same and all punctuation is pulled inside.

Neat structure. Each paragraph is about a specific topic, which was introduced by the first sentence. Again this is good practice, so humans can and will do this, which means this point is more about how seeing a poorly structured post gives evidence of it having been made by a human.

Long dashes. In many of these websites, including Reddit in particular, there is no way to get an em-dash or an en-dash beside using a keyboard shortcut, which a strong majority of people don't know about. Now, I personally am very aware of these shortcuts and sometimes use them (well, I use the em-dash sometimes and the en-dash never) but from a probabilistic perspective, if you see text using an em-dash—which, to be clear, looks like this—it's more likely to have come from an LLM than from a person. I suppose I should also give an example of an en dash, but there's only like 2–3 correct uses for them.

Excessive direct quotes. Humans telling a story about themselves will usually not bring in direct quotes, since remembering an actual quote from a casual conversation is something that almost nobody does. Of course, humans can and do remember and quote single words and phrases, but LLMs will quote entire sentence fragments, even if it doesn't really make sense to do so. Honestly most of the quotes in the above passage make sense to me, but "The spirits have chosen you. I can't fight them anymore." seems a bit on the borderline. 4a. There's also a specific structure that LLMs love to use, where someone describes something with "a descriptor in quotations" and "a second descriptor in quotations". That is, when describing what a person is saying they give exactly two quoted examples. This one doesn't appear in the story above, but you can see a lot of examples in the video.

Common words, phrases and tropes. Let's toss these in a sub-list. Keep in mind that none of these are hard evidence since they are, in fact, common. 5a. "I was floored. I was stunned. I was blown away." LLMs love emphasizing that characters are surprised by things. 5b. Smirking, grinning, or a combination of the two. I'm willing to bet this is specific of AITA LLM posts, but they love making their antagonists smirk. 5c. "My friends and family are split on the issue." LLMs love stating that the people around the poster have divided opinions about the issue, on account of that's what the AITA subreddit is focused on. This is especially egregious because a lot of the LLM stories have one perspective that is very clearly in the right, to the extent that anyone taking the other side would need to be downright malicious. We have a very good example here: Her friends are divided; half of them are taking her side while the other half say she should have "just kicked him out the normal way", you know, the thing she'd been trying to do for six months. 5d. Overhearing whispers to a stunning degree of accuracy, especially if it's about a contentious topic. 5e. "So, Reddit, AITA?" Honestly seems pretty weak as evidence to me since like 60% of human posts end this way, but apparently LLMs are more likely to use that specific phrasing, and more likely to provide a little summary of the problem after asking. This ties in to point 2, so the same caveats from there apply. In our case, I'd also like to point out that this summary doesn't really fit the story; nowhere does it seem that Steve is "emotionally clingy". He just seems like a normal loser. Also, from the comments of the video: 5f. "So buckle up, because here's where it gets wild." LLMs enjoy nothing more than a good escalation. We have a "now here's where it gets spicy" in this one as well.

So funny you forget to laugh. LLMs love making the most milquetoast wink-to-the-camera jokes you've ever seen. It's hard to describe the theme of them in words, but honestly for me the hard part is to clock them as attempted jokes in the first place since they're so terribly not funny. I think "which, honestly, was kind of flattering" might have been an attempted joke. I can't tell because I can't see if the author is winking to the camera or not.

Unbelievable details. Your standard "and everyone clapped" fare: strangers being invested in your issues, crazy coincidences, and contrived happenings. The ferret thing is one example, as is the bluetooth speaker in the walls, but neither of those seem too ridiculous on their own to me. The weirdest part for me was the friend using special effects makeup to "pretend to be a Victorian child ghost in the hallway mirror." How would that even work? Surely for him to see her in the hallway mirror, she would have to be behind him in the hallway? Also, what kind of makeup changes your height to be that of a child? 7a. A complete lack of emotional investment in the part of the poster. Real people are usually reluctant to leave long-term relationships, and will basically always have some strong emotions about doing so, but LLMs typically either paper this over with a simple phrase like "I was devastated" or (as we see in this example) fail to mention any emotional reaction at all. 7b. Omitting parts of the story that people usually include, and in particular the breakup process itself. How much of the stuff in her apartment was his? She states that he "packed a bag" and left; were all of his worldly possessions in there? Real breakups have logistics and annoyances, especially between people who had been living together.

Woah that's a wacky premise! LLM stories will generally have more outlandish titles and premises than real ones. (This can unfortunately only really be used as a test if you're on the actual subreddit, since the posts that get screenshot and spread are always such posts anyways.) Faking a haunted house definitely fits the bill. 8a. Another tip for finding them natively on Reddit is to check their comment history. LLM comments will be the most therapy-textbook all-affirming statements, every time. 8b. Everyone sucks! Stories in which every single person is being antagonistic to a cartoonish degree are way better at generating engagement than those in which characters are at all reasonable.

So, of all these red flags, which ones does the story raise? We've got clear violations of 1 and 2 (although not 1a) which could mean nothing. They're safe on point 3, with no long dashes in sight. Point 4 is questionable at best; definitely more quotation than usual, but still not at a level that I find strange. From the canned tropes we have 5c, 5e, and 5f. Jury's out on 6 and honestly I'm not sure if I'd be able to find an example even if it were there. Clear violations of 7, 7a, and 7b; crimes against plausibility that suggest the story is at least made up by a human, if not an LLM. Finally, a violation of point 8, although they're fine on 8b and it's impossible to verify 8a since their account has mysteriously vanished (as far as I could find).

In summary, while we can never be fully sure, the story contains enough of the hallmarks of LLM writing that I'm willing to at least entertain the possibility. I'd say pretty certain fake, and probable LLM story.

[lighthouseas]

i do not engage in discourse very much. instead i will be sitting here making my little bagel headcanons and fuming over the fact that byler tumblr is incapable of reblogging anything

[celaenaeiln]

I always assumed that from the comics I've read dick seems to have a somewhat complicated relationship with his own gender/sexuality/sex status, etc.

Anon!! You can't just drop this on me and leavee!! I need to hear more!! LEMME HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS!!!

Ok so this is gonna be like three different things so I'll make subcategories.

Gender

Of the things listed. I think gender is the one thing Dick is rather set on/secure about. He has some feminine or softer traits which typically would not be associated with a male character such as empathy and caring to an overemotional aspect -

Joker: Last Laugh Issue #3

Nightwing (1996) Issue #86

Nightwing (1996) Issue #139

Being overly kind to an unappreciative and toxic girlfriend is one thing, but as a brother hugging and kissing a brother? It's a little softer than how people usually write male heroes.

He's male and I don't think he's considered switching to the female side because he's comfortable with his masculinity.

Does he do things like this -

Nightwing (2016) Issue #38

sometimes? Yeah. He takes the female role in his relationships with others such as Bruce and Barbara but he still very much sees himself as masculine. Like I said in another post, Kori asks him to be a male consort to her Queen because she was forced to marry a royal Tamaranian Prince. While male consorts are not unusual in history, they typically embody the female in a stereotypical relationship. (On a separate note, did you know Chinese emperors took on male consorts? It is circumvented when speaking about in the present and laters days but it's officially written down in the books).

But overall, Dick is very much a masculine male with feminine qualities.

Sexuality

Ok so the thing about Dick and sexuality is that Dick Grayson is a very, VERY old character. He's been there since the beginning of DC to the point that he was the third DC character created EVER. Clark, then Bruce, then Dick, AND THEN Wonder Woman.

So with a character this old and with a topic as controversial as sexuality, DC is not going to ever explicitly write Dick as gay or bi or whatever. Why? Because Dick is an icon.

When someone says "Batman and Robin" - EVERYONE knows who Batman and Robin is. Bruce Wayne and Dick Grayson. They've existed forever and are the kingpins of DC alongside Superman and Wonder Woman. Whether that person is in the fandom or not, they know who Batman and Robin are. Within the fandom, people know there's more than one Robin (several) but talking to someone outside the fandom, someone who enjoys DC casually, only thinks there is one Robin. And you could tell them that there's this many robins, some have been girls, there's this many timelines and etc (which is actually a really embarrassing convo if someone isn't in the fandom OMG and how I wish I could take that back and erase it from BOTH OF OUR MEMORIES) - but they're not gonna care. Because for them, there's only one Robin and that's Dick Grayson.

So with something like that, DC cannot have Dick Grayson be anything but straight because it would cause too big of an uproar. So he can't be. Explicitly. People have written him as having an ambiguous sexuality though. I actually wrote this specific POST a long time because someone wanted to know more.

Instead what you'll have is a BUNCH of BROMANCES. His Nightwing authors have wanted more male/male sexual attractions with him and other characters and some of them have admitted that openly even if they were not allowed to write. So if you're reading a comic that has him and something seems SUS, well it might just be.

So like with all things, I cannot say anything for certain unless there is evidence of him engaging in a romantic relationship with someone who isn't a woman, but given the homoerotic tension that exists between him and other characters such as ROY -

Outsiders (2003) Issue #11

Teen Titans: Silver Age TPB 2 (Part 4) Page 16

Nightwing (1996) Issue #114

WHICH IS ODDLY SIMILAR TO THIS -

Nightwing (1996) Issue #138

I'd say he's bi-curious at the least.

Sex Symbol Status

-this is my previous post which goes a little into the sex symbol thing

Anon, holy crap I have an ESSAY for you. It's in my drafts because it's wayyyyyyyyy too long and I'll definitely exceed the image limit but holy crap.

Here's what I will say about it though. The world REVERES Dick for his looks and body. The amount of attention he gets for his beauty is ridiculous. Even Green Arrow's half-sister - WHO'S MUCH YOUNGER THAN DICK AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF DICK MET - dreams about him romantically.

Green Arrow (2016) Annual_1

Because of course. Villains are going out of their way to compliment him on his looks in the middle of a fight - Bane, Bludhaven villains, civilians (MALE) coworkers - it's literally insane.

So Dick is clearly the hottest and most gorgeous thing to ever exist in the entirety of DC. There's also a panel from a comic where Dick becomes Talon AND SOMEONE STILL CALLS HIM THE PRETTY BOY TALON LIKE WTF??? THAT PRETTY BOY TALON CAN RIP OFF YOUR HEAD IN A HEARTBEAT! He's a talon, too! Clearly death does not hinder his looks in any way.

But Dick himself is VERY uncomfortable any sort of bodily attraction. It's not just the comments that gets him but he, who everyone claims has the body of a god, doesn't feel good about his own body.

The New Titans (1988) Issue #71

He's really conservative. And in another comic when Tim comments on how the the Nightwing suit is really a babe attractor, Dick is uncomfortable going 'I didn't make it for them'.

Like even looking at this comic pic where Dick is in disguise and he and Kori are just walking down the street, they both still attract the entire street's attention. It must be so uncomfortable.

Here's my thoughts on the sex symbol status. Yes, Dick is a sex symbol. That's just fact. But here's where the issue is. People can be sex symbols without it affecting their personality because that status, is something given to them or bestowed upon them by another person.

I'm leaning a little into my post in the drafts but Johnny Depp, Marylyn Monroe, David Bowie, Tom Cruise, Cleopatra - they're all so vastly different on their opinions of sexual liberty and yet all of them as considered sex symbols.

So what does this mean for Dick? Nothing, really. It just means the world takes one look at him and wants him but he is under no obligation to follow through nor does he. He's not a slut for sleeping with the people he likes and no one thinks of him that way either. He was slut-shamed after his rape by Pantha who always has some harsher opinions because that is her personality. She literally says the meanest things about everyone because she's a rough and tough character and she finds humor in being mean because she is who she is.

For Dick himself, it means nothing. He doesn't view himself as attractive which ironically is also what celebrities who were interviewed about the sex symbol status said as well, such as Johny Depp.

The problem with being beautiful though is that people brush you off. Certain girlfriends of his do it. They see him as just a pretty boy and writers of certain comics *cough* Batgirl comics writers and Tom Taylor *cough* throw his skills and talent down the garbage disposal so he can act as a dumb pretty boy toy for his girlfriend. His personality is degraded to a bland white paste and his intelligence and power and pain are thrown out the window.

(This POST gives some examples of when writers do this for Dickbabs)

Like this is a serious problem! I read this article some time ago -

Here are the main highlights:

There isn't a problem with Dick being ascribed a sex symbol status and to his great benefit most people don't treat him like this but some do! LIKE HIS GIRLFRIEND.

In summary, and I'm gonna borrow a lyric here to quote -

"It's hell on earth to be heavenly Them's the breaks, they don't come gently"

I think the problem is, instead of focusing on how beautiful Dick looks, I really feel like DC and the fandom should analyze how uncomfortable Dick gets, how certain comics force him into relationships when others clearly show he wouldn't be interested in a parallel situation, and mostly how Dick Grayson is robbed of his personality, identity, and beliefs all because of how people believe he should act due to his beauty.

I'm honestly tired of the equation that Dick's status as a sex symbol somehow reduces him to a slut. He is not. Instead we should focus on how his beauty is weaponized against him. He was born with those looks and complaining about them is useless. That's his mother and father-given appearance. It's his genetic inheritance. It's as much a part of his as his grace or his unyielding kindness.

The real issue isn't DC’s acknowledgment of his beauty—it's the utter failure to dig deeper. Instead we should explore how Dick deals with it. How does he carry the weight of being constantly objectified? What does it do to his relationships? How is he coerced to do something in a relationship because it is expected of simply due to the fact that he's beautiful? We should explore how people (even the batfam sometimes) only see his smile or good-natured humor while his complexities - his pain, his resilience, his brilliance - are shucked aside? He's constantly diminished by the fandom and canon because of his cheery personality and good looks just to fit a particular character's narrow view of him.

Call him pretty! Dick legit doesn't care if villains call him pretty or someone calls him that because what they're really focused on when they call him that, are his skills. He doesn't mind being called pretty, beautiful, gorgeous - as long as he's valued for his talents and efforts and skills.

(Here's the pretty boy post for my lovelies. Part 2 in the making)

The issue, once again, isn't his sex symbol status or his looks. It's literally everything else. Dick Grayson is not a reflection of what others project; he is a someone who stands apart, vibrant, and irreducibly whole. Which too often gets lost underneath his looks.

[tarotlexa]

PICK A PILE READING- what does your pet want to tell you?

welcome back my loves, i wanted to thank my wonderful community/readers for participating in my poll (the results were all pretty much the same with the pet reading winning by 34%, i am so glad to see that everyone is interested in different topics that my mind comes up on the spot with). thank you, thank you and thank you again for your support, your love and the kindness you have shown towards me. <3

as always my love, this is a collective reading so take what resonates and leave what does not. much loveee <3

⠀.　　　　　　　　　　⠀⠀⠀✦ ⠀ ⠀　　　　　　　　　　　　　　⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀* ⠀⠀⠀.　　　　　　　　　　. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀✦⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀.　　　　　　　　　　　　　.　　　ﾟ .　　　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　✦ 　　　　　,　　　　　　　. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 　　　　　　*　　　　　　　　　　　. .　　　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　✦⠀　   　　　,　　　　　　　　　* 　　　　　⠀　　　　⠀　　, ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀.　　　　　 　　⠀　　　⠀.　 　　˚　　　⠀　⠀  　　,　　　　　　. 　　　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　　　　　*⠀　　⠀  　　　　　⠀✦⠀　 　　　　　　*　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　　　.　　　　.　　　⠀ 　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　　　　　　 　　　˚　　　　　　　　ﾟ　　　　　. 　.⠀　　⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀, 　　　*　　⠀. 　　　　　.　　　　　　　　　　⠀✦ 　˚　　　　　　　　　　　　　　* .⠀ 　　　　　　　　　　.　　　　　　　　. 　　　　　✦⠀　   　　　,　　    　　　　　　　　. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀.　　　　　　　　　　⠀⠀⠀✦ ⠀ ⠀　　　　　　　　　　　　　　⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀* ⠀⠀⠀.　　　　　　　　　　. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀✦⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀.　　　　　　　　　　　　　.　　　ﾟ .　　　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　✦ 　　　　　,　　　　　　　. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 　　　　　　*　　　　　　　　　　　. .　　　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　✦⠀　   　　　,　　　　　　　　　* 　　　　　⠀　　　　⠀　　, ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀.　　　　　 　　⠀　　　⠀.　 　　˚　　　⠀　⠀  　　,　　　　　　. 　　　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　　　　　*⠀　　⠀  　　　　　⠀✦⠀　 　　　　　　*　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　　　.　　　　.　　　 　　　　　　　　　　　. 　　　　　　　 　　　˚　　　　　　　　ﾟ　　　　　. 　.⠀　⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀‍⠀, 　　　　　✦⠀　   　　　,

pile 1: this could be a very observant, curious, likely younger pet. i'm feeling parrot/cat energy (or if it's a dog they might not look much like one lol). extremely intelligent, alert, they LOVE watching you or follow you around just because. they might be the type of pet that tilts their head at you when you talk, follows your every move, or even seems to anticipate your emotions before you express them. they are fast and sometimes restless—always needing mental stimulation. perhaps they’re the type to zoom around the house unexpectedly or respond quickly to sudden noises. what your pet wants you to know: i love our little routines, i love it when YOU feed me, thank you for giving me tasty treats, please stop doubting your passions, follow your newfound hobbies, i see the way you light up when you start practicing those hobbies, please stop bedrotting so much, move more, i love the way that you engage with me, please play with me more. (this was so sweet it almost made me cry ahhh please play with your baby <3)

pile 2: this is definitely a dog and not just a dog but a soulmate companion who was sent on earth specifically for you, medium to large sized, floppy ears, on the rounder side or VERY well-fed hahahaha

they are incredibly loyal, deeply attached to you and you specifically (even if you live with other people), they always wait for you by the door to greet you. i'm literally about to cry rn because they LOVE nostalgia, things that remind them of your scent like your socks, your blanket, your pillow. what this pet wants you to know: you don't need to fight so hard to prove yourself, they might not understand you the way that you think they do (related to parents specifically?) so don't take it personal, you are enough as you are, i understand even if you don't say things out loud, i'll always be right here for you, i watch over you all the time even if you don't realize it, i'm your protector, please trust yourself more, you are my home. :')

pile 3: this pet has been through something heavy, might be a rescue or a pet with some trust issues related to their past. they tend to absorb your energy and that's why they might seem to be sad sometimes, they want to help you heal. probably an older soul, i'm picking up more of a cat vibe. thin, fragile, worn frame, might have some aging signs. very slow and deliberate movement. they're sensitive, intuitive and they act a bit like your shadow, always nearby but never demanding. they are your healer. what your pet wants you to know rn: you don't have to follow the rules so much, you are meant for more, i don't want you to hold onto guilt or regrets or words that hurt you in the past, you are so much more loved than you realize, thank you for being my friend, i love it when you brush me, please take care of yourself the way you take care of me, you deserve softness too, you're my baby (not me literally crying right now i'm never doing pet readings again, i am too attuned to their energy ahhh), i love the way you love me, please share your thoughts with me, trust me with your emotions, i am here for you, also i don't like your toothpaste (THIS IS SO RANDOM I KNOW).

as always, thank you so much for reading. let me know if this resonated with you <3

[yet-another-heathen]

On the topic of realistic conditioning/deconditioning,

If the trigger is something whumpee wouldn't hear often when they're with caretaker but whumpee still wants to break it because they might hear it elsewhere (like kneel being taken as a command)

Would whumpee ask caretaker to casually trigger them so they have the opportunity to challenge it in their own head and in a safe place? Would this be a good idea for recovery?

And of course being there with the praise everytime whumpee makes just a little bit of progress, or comfort when they don't.

Heads up, anon: your ask was an EXCEPTIONALLY good one, and I ended up writing another mini TED talk (~3-4 min read) in response. Thank you so much for sending it in!

...on Conditioned Whumpees - Part 3

[ Part 1 - Part 2 ]

That is a very, very good idea! You're spot on with all of it, particularly operating in a safe environment where whumpee is ultimately calling the shots. Having that comfort/support readily available will make a huge difference in how well whumpee can tackle the matter. And while the process isn't fun, approaching desensitization with this much intent is much, much more likely to result in success.

I can offer a few pointers that can add another few layers of realism, as well as some other things to think about while tailoring it to your story:

if whumpee is actively working through their conditioning in this way, memories of their trauma will become closer to the surface. As a result, all of their other PTSD symptoms will be elevated during the course of their practice sessions, as well as for at least a few weeks after.

flashbacks are a very common experience during times like this. engaging with triggers like this is going to cause their flashbacks to become more frequent and intense.

during such flashbacks, it is almost a given that whumpee's mind and body will enter a similar state to the one it was in during the time when the flashback was taking place. By that I mean that the fear they felt in that moment, where it was physically located in their body, will echo into their body in the present moment. Same goes for other all other emotions, and sometimes even phantom aches surrounding any injuries they received at the time...

while the emotions tend to be identical to the ones felt during the trauma, in my experience, the pain comes out distorted in a similar way to the way it does in dreams: less intense, and more "blurry" and imprecise in location. When we say that someone having a flashback is "reliving the moment", we mean that their body literally feels as though they're in the same immediate danger that it was in back then.

this is true even though they'll be aware to at least some degree that they're presently with caretaker and safe.

the flashbacks don't always happen immediately after the conditioning trigger is used. Often they flare up hours or days later, sometimes without warning, sometimes as a result of encountering a different flashback trigger. The whumpee's thresholds for what counts as a trigger will drop, which is part of what causes the flashbacks to happen more often. Something they could normally ignore is going to affect them much more while they're like this.

your whumpee is more likely to experience severe mood swings while in this heightened state. Especially feelings like irritability, frustration, anger, loneliness, and grief. This stuff ain't pretty, folks. Even your sweet cinnamon bun is most likely going to lash out at someone as a result.

PTSD episodes are also exhausting. your whumpee is going to feel mentally, physically, and emotionally drained. And, to add insult to injury, being tired amplifies the emotions listed above.

Now all of this said, your whumpee may or may not know that this is to be expected. If they've worked on processing their trauma before this, they'll have figured out that one often leads to the other. They'll go into the deconditioning practice knowing this is coming, and will approach it carefully, but with a fairly level head. Knowing that it'll suck, but they'll come out the other side okay.

If not, they're in for a rather nasty surprise.

For the latter, they will feel at first that the deconditioning practice is making everything worse. They're suddenly struggling the way they did when the trauma was fresher, and it can be tempting to stop and refuse to touch it again because the mental/emotional pain gets so intense.

If they do give up at this stage, it will make trying again far more daunting in the future.

But the trauma being stirred up is actually a sign that it's helping. It means that the whumpee is starting to process what happened to them, which is a fundamental step in being able to heal.

Note: All throughout the process, crying is a very good thing. It lets them physically get rid of a lot of the brain chemicals associated with these surges of emotion. Letting themselves cry over things they couldn't cry about back then can actually help them let go of those feelings in a similar way to if they'd been able to process them in the moment. [Which is the basis for much of EMDR, a specialized tool used in trauma therapy.]

Okay. So now we know what other effects can cascade from the actual deconditioning practice, now we have some things to consider.

First off, what time parameters are whumpee and caretaker working within while deconditioning? There are three basic options:

they sit down together and practice repeatedly using the trigger for [X amount of time; usually <45m at once] back to back. Once that time is up, caretaker will no longer use the trigger at all, the excercise will end, and they'll get up to do something else.

whumpee sets a specific window of time [X number of hours] within which caretaker will use the trigger word at random points. Once that time has elapsed, the exercise is over.

over the course of days, caretaker uses the trigger word at random points without giving warning. the excercise only stops after being ended by whumpee.

Now why is that important? Because of something called hypervigilance. It is another symptom of PTSD which, to put it into the simplest words, is whumpee waiting for the other shoe to drop. It's a heightened state of tension and wariness in which whumpee is expecting that something bad is going to happen, and is constantly searching for any sign to indicate when it's coming.

It is beyond exhausting.

Imagine knowing that someone is about to slap you as hard as they can, and you have to sit there with your eyes closed, waiting for it. The breath-holding, the flinchiness, the rigid tension in your body as you strain to listen for when they're coming.

Only now, stretch that moment out into hours. Days. Weeks. That is hypervigilance.

A hypervigilant whumpee is not going to be able to relax. Or rest. Or decompress. Or readily trust much of anything around them. They're MUCH more likely to flinch at sudden movements/sounds. They might start biting their nails or showing other signs of nervousness and distress.

These methods above have a gradually increasing chance of setting off whumpee's hypervigilance. If they know exactly when the next trigger is coming, as in example 1, then their 'waiting for it' tension will be low. But the more uncertain they become of exactly when it's going to happen, as in examples 2 & 3, the worse the hypervigilance is going to get.

The trade off is that the later examples are more effective in desensitizing them toward the trigger. The more their practice mimics encountering an unexpected trigger in day-to-day life, the easier it will be to fall back on that desensitization when the time comes.

Therefore, it would be a very good idea for a whumpee who's new to this to start with number 1, then gradually progress to 2 & 3 as time goes on. They should be the one to decide when the next step is made, and if/when they need to dial it back.

Other questions to ask yourself while plotting:

how mentally prepared is whumpee for worsening symptoms? what about caretaker? did either of them know it was coming?

how much of this heightened PTSD stress can your whumpee take before it becomes too much? how do they react when they do hit that tipping point?

if caretaker feels that whumpee is getting too distressed during practice even though they're not tapping out, would they call it off themself? Or would they ultimately leave that decision to whumpee?

based on the answer, how would whumpee feel about caretaker's decision? Relieved? Belittled? Betrayed?

does whumpee have any grounding tools they can use while practicing?

how does caretaker handle the mood swings and instability that come with whumpee's heightened PTSD? You should consider both their internal and external reactions on the matter.

how does whumpee prefer to decompress after a practice session? what things would help them calm down and recover?

how long do they need (hours or days) before the next attempt?

Even with all I've just written, there's far more to the resulting hightened state of PTSD than flashbacks and hypervigilance. PTSD symptoms that they're most likely to encounter in the background while doing deconditioning practice include:

Flinchiness, anxiety, panic attacks, nightmares, exhaustion, emotional mood swings, outbursts, crying spells, depression, executive dysfunction, dissociation, numbness, racing thoughts, freeze responses, tremors, inappetence, muscle tension, and heart palpitations.

Yes, usually many of them at once, even those that contradict. Your whumpee is going to have a LOT going on at once, and it is not going to be a fun time. I recommend looking up any of the above symptoms you don't recognize, and looking for whump inspiration in what you learn.

(Because everyone experiences PTSD episodes differently, there's a lot of wiggle room in which ones whumpee will encounter. Don't feel pressured to use all of them, find what you want to write and have fun with it!)

Thanks again for the incredible ask, anon. And again, I want to congratulate you on how spot-on your original ask was. You nailed it. I know this was a lot more than you asked for, but I hope this provides helpful context for your whump! My inbox will always be open if you think of anything more <3

[loveemagicpeace]

🍯Astrology Notes🍯

🪴Virgo rising- are very caring people. They take great care to ensure that you have everything you need, especially for your health. They will be able to tell you a lot about various medicines.

🌱Gemini rising- funny as fuck sometimes. They are people who talk and don't stop. You can discuss all possible topics with them if you want. They have a very open mind. But when it comes to being able to do something, sometimes they are not so open to new things. Let's say one difference between them and Sagittarius is that they are not traveling types and they don't like to travel that much.

💫You will feel most comfortable talking to people with whom you have the same compatible moon and mercury in your house. for example: mercury in the 9th house and the other person has mercury in the 1st house. With this you can see what topics you can discuss with others.

🪐People who has saturn in 1st house looks better when they are skinnier. Because their bones and body structure are more beautifully emphasized. Many times they can have weight problems(they can quickly lose weight from worry).

🍀Earth signs look very down to earth even when they are joking around. Even when they make a crazy joke, they still look down to earth.

🐚Scorpios quickly stop trusting you. You just have to do one thing and they are done trusting you. When they see that you are dishonest to them in any kind of way, they will not trust you anymore. Especially when they get to know someone from the beginning and notice that they didn't tell them something or hid something from them, and as I said, it could be just one small thing like say you're going to say you're eating pizza, but in reality you're eating hamburger. It is small lie. But this is sometimes also one of the reasons why pisces and scorpio don't go so well together. Because pisces tend not to say everything while scorpios are. Many times, pisces swim off into their fantasy world and sometimes get lost in it. Scorpios are always looking for the truth in everything. I have seen successful Scorpio/Capricorn couples many times.

🍁Fire signs are actually very active people. So you have to prove them love with actions. They want to see how much you are willing to do for them and how much you are willing to risk. When you go beyond your limits and do something really crazy for them, they will really appreciate it.

💷2nd house represents your money & 8th house where you invest money. The 2nd house reflects your underlying relationship to money and patterns around money are often deeply ingrained. With the Moon in Cancer here, your emotional wellbeing rises and falls with your bank balance, both of which may be subject to flux. You can be a rags-to-riches success, but with Saturn in the 2nd you might always feel poor, the millionaire who still buys the budget range at the supermarket. The 8th house is concerned with debt and our relationship to institutions which provide loans, mortgages, and overdrafts. Capricorn on the cusp of the 8th suggests paying your dues and insisting on a proper contract, Sagittarius here you can invest a lot in travel or even illegal things.

☀️The Sun is the central flame of our vitality. Acting according to your Sun sign and engaging in activities denoted by the house it occupies are important ways to increase your energy and vigour. For instance, with Sun in the 1st, you might need time alone in order to recoup your energies - the presence of others can drain you, Or with Sun in the 6th, maybe you like to spend spare time working in the garden or catching up on DIY. The Sun in Sagittarius might mean you like to explore far afield; if in Aquarius maybe you like to holiday with a group of friends. Sun in Scorpio- working in the shadows or researching something no one knows about is best for you. Sun in 7th house you like to devote a lot of your time to your partner.

🧸Some signs are naturally more work-oriented and some more suggestive of needing a slower pace. Capricorn (or its ruler Saturn) is often highlighted in the charts of anyone with a strong work ethic - by contrast, Leo, Libra, or Pisces might engender a bit more need for time off, to play, relax, or dream. Each Zodiac sign has its ideal gap year or holiday. The fire signs might favour adventure breaks, the air signs a chance to meet new faces, the earth signs maybe an eco-trip; and the water signs a sojourn by the sea or in quiet, restful places.

🩰The IC and the 4th house describe home, both as a physical place and as an inner sense of roots, safety, and foundation. If you have Jupiter in the 4th, it might feel natural to you to travel around or you might even choose to live abroad - or with Uranus here, you may experience many changes of home(many unexpected moves). With the Sun or Moon in the 4th, you might be so strongly connected to home and homeland that uprooting yourself will not be easy - your Sun here suggests your life revolves around home in some way, the Moon that your emotional wellbeing is closely tied to it. With Pluto you can feel that your home is intense and that you are always transforming through it (but it can also leave bad memories). With Mercury can mean that you change your home a lot. With Mars you may feel that your home is often chaotic or aggressive and you are looking for a home where you can become independent. With Neptune many times your home is confusing, strange. Many times you find your ideal place somewhere by the ocean. With Venus your home is loving, genuine and you have loving parents to whom you love to return. But it can involve a lot of money or love based on it. So you can feel that your parents never really appreciated you if you didn't have money.

🧚🏼‍♀️About Aquarius: I want to say one thing about them. I would say that if they really really want they will do it. But most likely they are independent people & lost souls sometimes. I think that they are scared of attachment. So that's why they are rather alone. They are looking for someone. Who will be goofy as they are.

💌I think Valentine's Day is for Libras. Libra is a sign of love, romance,beautiful things. And if any sign is inclined to & like to celebrate this day, it's definitely the Libra. But I find it a little strange that it is in Aquarius season.

💘Cupido is definitely a Sagittarius sign. Although people don't believe that Sagittarians are so loving and romantic, but they really are. Cupido shoots into the hearts of people who are meant to be together. If you hit a sagittarius deep in the heart with your love, then you can see the true side of them. Then you can see how loving they are.

🌅The people you attract into your life are usually connected to your North Node.For ex.: North node in Virgo in your 8th house- you will mostly be attracted to people who have a virgo placements, scoprpio placements, or pisces/ taurus placements.

🌊Pluto symbolizes power in whatever house it is. The power you feel in yourself and the people around you. Strong experience of feelings. For ex.: 5th house - privacy, romance, jealousy, strong emotions, strong happiness, attitude towards the things you do, you feel strong love, devotion. Obsession with changing partners maybe or affairs idk. 6th house - obsessed with perfection, control, work, high expectations. 7th house - you attract a lot of possessive partners, obsession with your partner, but at the same time you can be afraid to get into a relationship, mistrust. 8th house rulership- curious, constant control, secrets, power over your secrets, emotional transformations, many dark things, connection with birth and death, great interest in hidden things. 10th house - people can see you as a strong opponent, driven for a career, they can see you as a person who has a lot of secrets, you can present people with challenges. Big influence.

-Rebekah🧚🏼‍♀️🩰🌙

[pineconepie]

I'm not sure if I've asked this before because I remember typing it but the wifi was unstable so just ignore this if I have already asked this, but I'm wondering how the yandads would be with a reader who has a major hyperfixation, I'm talking like hours upon hours of info dumping. These poor dads would have absolutely no escape from a yapper like this, like they talk so much that it gets into the way of plans, like for Vincent, they talk so long that it interrupts a meeting, and guess what it's all on? Absolute random facts on EVERYTHING they like just a little too much. (Defo not asking this bc your account has given me a bit of a hyperfixation- I swear I'm not stalking your account, I'm just autistic-)

As someone with AuDHD, I know how you feel, don't worry XD

Octavian has dealt with kids rambling before, he knows exactly how to handle this. He doesn't mind your rants one bit. They bring a small smile to his face as he patiently listens, nodding along while doing chores or putting his book down just to listen.

He's very good at remembering everything you tell him, and making mental notes about certain gifts he thinks you'll like based on your hyperfixations.

.

Vincent adores how you get passionate about your hobbies. It brings the biggest grin to his face. He'll make you your favorite snacks, pull out a seat for you, and gesture to you to come tell him about whatever it is you want to discuss, and would be good at engaging in the conversation to show he's listening.

He hates meetings more than anything, so if you infodump in the middle of said meeting, he'll make everyone listen to you as well, and if they say anything disrespectful they're getting fired (literally).

.

Indigo has some hyperfixations as well (namely seashells and humans), so he understands how happy it'll make you if he listens and engages in the conversation.

No matter what your hyperfixation is about, he would genuinely find it fascinating if you talked passionately. Though sometimes his attention span might be short, so there are a few times he may accidentally space out.

.

Magnus doesn't understand, but he really wants to. It makes him feel happy hearing you ramble about your hyperfixations because he's used to thinking purely of survival, its almost a breath of fresh air. He'll listen intently but still be confused very often, especially if its something only humans have an understanding of.

Still, he'd encourage you to talk about them. If your hyperfixation is something he can physically gift you (i.e. gems, flowers, bugs) he will seek them out for you.

.

Seradiel knows about them, of course, since he was watching you while you developed them. Seradiel would be the most intent listener, and wouldn't space out once (though on the downside, he's so quiet because he wants you to talk to your heart's content, that you might think he's spaced out).

He enjoys the sound of your voice, no matter what you're discussing.

.

Warren has plenty of patience to hear your rambles because he also genuinely enjoys them. He would sit beside you and engage with them, encouraging you to explain your interests further.

He'd do his own research on the topics and things you're passionate about so he can engage even more in the conversation with you and earn your approval more.

[drdemonprince]

i’d love to know your perspective on the substack essay “of course people make up disabilities” that freddie deboer just posted today (09/30) if you felt inspired to write about it. no worries if you’d rather not of course! i appreciate your work very much (and i’m expecting to agree with your perspective on this topic wayyy more than with freddie’s btw)

This would make SUCH a good livestream topic to be honest. That would allow me & others to really go through the weeds of it and be appropriately nuanced.

I have several thoughts about it, which I'll just bullet point here:

One of Freddy's big issues whenever he discusses the neurodiversity movement is that he still presumes the pathology model is always correct and appropriate, and should be applied to even how neurodivergent people experience being themselves. This means that throughout his piece, he describes the massive uptick in people identifying as "systems" as there being this very sudden, very large increase in what used to be a very rare and debilitating disorder, DID -- but that's conflating a bunch of different communities into one. Not everyone who identifies as a system identifies as DID. Not everyone who identifies as a system exhibits or even claims to exhibit the symptoms of DID outlined in the DSM. Lots of people who identify as systems are median systems or are heavily masked, which means they don't look anything like what psychiatry has typically understood DID to be, nor does it match with the pop cultural stereotypes. Obviously these are many people who would not be captured by a DID diagnosis in the past. And just like many Autistics who were not diagnosed in the past, many people who were not diagnosed with DID but do identify as having DID argue that the diagnostic process for the disorder up to this point has been highly limited and biased. Of all the conditions in the DSM, DID is the one MOST attached to a small cluster of diagnosticians -- most people practicing psychiatry and psychology have no expertise in it, and NEVER diagnose it because they don't know anything about it. And so obviously, a lot of people have slipped through the cracks, if we view DID as a real, useful clinical label. Furthermore, talking about oneself as being a system serves a variety of functions, and not everyone who identifies as being a system (or even as having DID) sees themselves as debilitated by it. So Freddy's concern that a huge contingent of people are suddenly claiming to be debilitated by a severe disorder is just misrepresenting what a large number of these people are saying about themselves, and how the diagnostic process for DID works.

Freddy takes it as a given that some kind of apparatus for investigating disability claims is necessary, because people lie. He provides no support for this assertion. I'm happy to allow that of course, sometimes human beings lie (or fool themselves), but we don't have any evidence that people doing this places some massive strain on the social welfare system. We have every reason to believe that like most other humans, disabled people are motivated to feel capable, challenged, and engaged, and we know that disability benefits are meager and come with conditions that trap a person in poverty for life -- so why are we worried about too many people accessing disability services? It's an absurd claim for a leftist to make, but then again, many Marxist do have this kind of shitty attitude toward disability, and carry within them the presumption that people need to get stronger and should be pushed to work, so. It's of a piece with that.

I do see some merit to Freddy's observation that disability and one's self-conception as disabled is often a shadowy, shape-shifting thing -- some days you convince yourself you really do have this disability, other days you are kind of rounding up the truth, other days you don't know at all -- but this is because of the subjective nature of how these conditions are defined and measured, and because of the inherent value judgement that psychiatry makes of anyone who appears to be operating differently as somehow inferior or "sick," even if it can't explain how or why they are. I don't understand how he can openly explore just how difficult it can be to figure out whether you are a system (or Autistic, or struggling with bipolar, as he was for years before he got a handle on it) and then conclude that these categories can be assigned to others with full objectivity. He seems to think individuals CANNOT know our own mental health status categorically but that psychiatrists infallibly can? That there is some objective truth to the question of whether a person is DiD or Autistic or whatever else that can be easily determined -- and he's a smart enough and data driven enough guy to go figure out that's not the case. Psychiatrists exhibit frighteningly low inter-rater reliability in their diagnoses!! Diagnostic standards change over time, and are applied differently to different groups of people! Symptoms come and go! How we explain what is going on inside of us is culturally influenced! How could he not understand how complex this all is?

His anecdote about lots of young women suddenly using canes is so needlessly cheap. He's a better writer than this. Why might a lot more young people be physically disabled all of a sudden? Something about a pandemic maybe?? Does he not know POTS is a common side-effect of long COVID? Among many other conditions that would require using a cane?

I do agree with him that sometimes people do fake conditions to make money from fundraising online, or for the attention! Yes, undeniably, it happens! We're on tumblr, we remember the Hatsune Miku binder girl pretending she had HIV. Scammers exist. Fantasists exist. And people who tend to make up elaborate lies about themselves and their lives are typically SUFFERING -- even if we concede that some girls on tiktok are faking having DID (I am happy to concede that, yes, it happens), if someone goes to great and repeated lengths to create false alters and produce endless content about their condition to an audience of thousands, they're obviously struggling in some way most of the time. For some maybe it's some dispassionate grift. Sure. Whatever. It does happen! But in Freddy's own framing, we are talking about a lot of people who are only half-willfully self-deluding, and desperate for attention online -- so would he say they are faking DID but are clearly mentally ill in some other way? Or does he think they just need to toughen up and stop thinking these irrational things about themselves entirely? How does he think that would work? Being so miserable and confused about yourself that you convince yourself that you have a disorder that you do not have and orienting your whole life around that doesn't sound like a person Freddy would call "well." So are they lying? Still not mentally ill? Or mentally ill in a slipperier way, where the way that you think and feel affects the way that you think and feel about yourself, which helps to create your new reality, which then is true for you? If you think you're DID, feel like you're DID, act like you're DID, are debilitated like someone who has DID, are you not DID?

Freddy seems to think of mental illness diagnostic categories as far more contained and distinct than they actually are. Trauma symptoms can morph into OCD, attachment dysfunction can look like Borderline at one moment and then Bipolar the next, Autistic people can become eating disordered for Autism reasons, and people who are desperate for acceptance can take up cutting and then just have a cutting problem. there is no brain scan or genetic test that can definitively tell you which one of these disorders you have, because they are only defined through self-report and observation, and our behavior and feelings continually keeps changing. And so it's useless to talk about what the rates of any given disorder "should be" because there is no objective metric for that, and there is no objective, set in stone standard for what any disorder really is. The eating disorder rate has certainly changed over time as a product of all manner of cultural influences -- was that a bunch of people faking it for attention too?

I really struggle to understand why Freddy, a Marxist, has refused to engage with Marxist critiques of psychiatry at all whatsoever. SO many excellent books have come out on the subject in recent years, from Micha Fraiser-Carroll's Mad World to Robert Chapman's Empire of Normality. He seems, for his own reasons, to be heavily invested in the pathology paradigm and to view regular people as completely lacking meaningful insight into their own mental states, and those with forma diagnoses as utterly incapable of determining what is best for themselves (while also arguing that people with such diagnoses should always be held accountable for their actions). It's frustrating because I like to read his perspective on many topics, even when I disagree with him, but I can't find his work challenging or interesting here because he's so steadfastly incurious about the scholarship that goes against his own pre-conceived notions, so he ends up writing rants on the subject that feel at once earnestly felt but ignorant and reactionary.

[the-fabled-void]

*emerges from lab, with messy hair, eyebags, and carrying a conspiracy board*

We've been thinking about Frisk's personality the wrong way! They're not either merciful or murderous, or flirty or childish. They're all of them at once. Their personality is one of possibly. They aren't one individual option, but choice itself.

They represent something we don't consider a part of their personality as a human, and that's something that makes them *so* human. Because humans aren't a set of choices, but all of those choices combined, and the drive and possibly to make any of them at any given moment.

They're not a blank slate or something you project yourself onto. They're their own character, you just help them choose.

The choices are always there, Frisk always has them. The choices are not ours, they're theirs.

The Frisk who flirts with every monster, being silly and becoming friends with them? That's Frisk.

The Frisk that's pissed off at everyone but still wants to be friends? That's Frisk.

The goody two shoes who's as nice as possible? That's Frisk.

The Frisk that does what is necessary to achieve the best ending? Frisk.

And the Frisk who kills off everyone, just to see what happens? Still Frisk.

They only allow the player to choose between a very specific set of actions. Fight, Act, Item, Mercy. And the ACTS change from monster to monster, only a few they seem really fond of staying the same.

As expected from a kid, they seem to be driven by curiosity. They want to know as much as possible about a given Monster. Conversations- there's quite the extensive set of options when calling someone. You don't have to give them any input for what to say if they choose to call anyone. Simply calling is enough.

It's implied they made quite a dirty joke if they're told to flirt with Toriel after calling her mom. Because believe it or not, kids sometimes know about weird topics without engaging in them.

Even their expression could be used as evidence: -_- is now they look- their eyes closed, they're allowing you to guide them.

Despite how people portray them, they're not a silent protagonist, they're not speechless. They're actually quite talkative.

It's like they recognize that you want to play the game, and that you can only do that by giving them choices. And they allow you to give them choices. But only those specific ones.

It's like they're saying "you can play, but you gotta play by my rules"

Not to mention the circumstances that have to happen for you to know their name.

Because despite all these options, the kid does have a preference. They want to be friends with everyone. Or at least, they want everyone to be as happy as they can make them. That's why, only once you manage to help them free everyone, you get to learn that they're called Frisk.

"You're not really [Player Name], are you?"

That? That's Asriel, not just acknowledging that Frisk is not his childhood friend and kindered spirit. The one he misconstrued in order to relate to them, who wasn't perfect, but still trying their best. He knows Frisk not them.

No, he's acknowledging that, despite everything, despite the choices made in their regard, Frisk is happy. Someone chose for them, but they did it by their rules. Everyone is happy, just like they wanted. And Frisk did not change as a person.

You do not learn Frisk's name if you do not appease them.

Instead, they disown your choices, and you by refusing to let you know who they are, if you don't make them happy.

If you do the opposite of what they want you to do, you only get what you've been doing reflected back at you.

By someone bearing your name but not your face.

And they? [Your name]? Chara? ? They will remind you, even if Frisk is gone, that you were the one to drive them away.

"You didn't follow the rules, you betrayed the trust I gave you. You proved yourself unworthy of control. I won't even allow you the illusion of playing through me anymore."

You thought you could do what you want with them, but now, they're rejecting you.

Despite how little control they seem to have, Frisk is the one pulling the strings.

This is their game.

[yawujin]

Hallo would you be alright with writing (you don't have to) v3 boys x blunt reader (male)

Example: *someone walks into the room wearing baggy pants and a long coat* reader:"you look like you have stubby legs"

Also side note I think it would be funny if tenko has beef with him due to him sometimes calling her out on her shit (I don't like tenko that much)

Pls&thx

request | v3 boys x a very blunt reader

type | react , non killing game, male reader

shuichi saihara ♡

shuichi definitely appreciates you being able to be unapologetically blunt and honest

sure he can be too but

sometimes it's hard for him to be completely honest with some people

he goes to you the most for constructive criticism

rantaro amami ♡

he likes that you keep people in check

when tenko tries to call rantaro a 'disgusting' male, you step in and tell her rantaro is fine just the way he is

rantaro is a pretty nice guy after all

and you just have no problem telling him that

K1B0/kiibo ♡

you can bet this man was DEVASTATED when you told him his singing is really not good, like, at all

he's really happy when you do give him praise for things he's especially skilled at though

is appreciative towards you when you step into an argument he's having with someone

you're always reminding him that not everyone is 'robophobic' and they're just joking with him

korekiyo shinguji ♡

he finds your ability to be so blunt very admirable

if someone tries to give you shit about you having no filter

korekiyo will remind you that being honest is a sign of good communication

he's happiest when engaging in conversation with you about his anthropology work because of your opinions on various topics

kaito momota ♡

"he's obviously not an idiot if he was able to pass the exams to become an astronaut" is what you said when everyone called him an idiot

"FINALLY, THANK YOU (Y/N)!!!" he exclaimed happily

"he's smart in his own way" you smiled

"hey! that's very backhanded!!" he cried

eventually kaito, got used to your comments and it made him toughen up

it was so refreshing that he found someone that talks so freely

gonta gokuhara ♡

you ward off the people that like to make jokes at gonta's expense

at times, gonta asks you not to be so harsh

sometimes you let people off easy, other times not so much

"thanks (Y/N) for protecting gonta" he gave you a tender hug

gonta often goes to you for advice on how to be more gentlemanly

ryoma hoshi ♡

likes that you can be brutally honest

doesn't mind that you don't sugarcoat your opinions on his plays during tennis, especially if he didn't give it his all at practice that day

when that happens, you joke with him by using his own catchphrase back at him "you've still got a ways to go"

he always looks forward to your compliments when he does do well though

kokichi ouma ♡

a very interesting dynamic to say the least

your truth and his lies clash most of the time

for example:

someone will walk into a room with you two inside, and ask your guys' opinion on their outfit

"it's shit" you say

"it's perfect!" kokichi remarks

you two get in a mini argument, and the poor person walks out of the room confused on how they really look

[tuttle-did-it]

PSA FROM EXHAUSTION.

Signed up for a series of online lectures. Couldn't understand a word, couldn't lip-read speaker (which is very difficult anyway). Couldn't participate, couldn't engage, couldn't understand. Had to leave because it didn't even occur to them to put captions on

Folks, if you are posting ANY video online or send it to another human, please enable captions/subtitles.

Deaf people need captions

Hard of hearing people need captions

People with audio processing conditions need captions

People with ADHD often need captions to maintain attention

People who are not native speakers of the primary language need captions

People who are watching something in a private space and are not able to watch with volume need captions

People with learning difficulties/differences/disabilities need captions

People trying to watch something with bad audio recording need captions

People who have migraines/headaches and really can't deal with sound but still need to watch the video (for whatever reason) need captions

People who have colds/ear infections/went to a concert without ear protection and have bad tinnitus need captions

People who are very new to a topic need captions

People who are multi-tasking need captions

people with misophonia need captions

People who are neurospicy and just need fucking captions need fucking caption

People need captions.

And, whilst I have your attention, don't just use autocraptions from the computer that only get about 65%. I mean, look-- I'll take auto craptions over nothing, but there is a reason deaf people cal them 'craptions.' We hate them, it's very often word salad, and it's just useless. You can process the video through with autocraptions, and then go in and make corrections where the craptions got it wrong. And, if you feel super fancy, you could even put in things like full stops and commas to make it easier to read.

Also, when captioning, please put actions/reactions in brackets. Anything off screen, any noises we may not be able to hear. Examples: [Audience cheers] [Explosion off screen, people shouting] [sound of phone ringing.]

If something is inaudible or the sound does not catch what they said, please signify this. If it's a montage and there's music with no dialogue, say this. Examples:

[Mulcahy speaks indistinctly.]

[inaudible]

[audio cuts out]

[no audio, no music]

[music- Sinatra' song (song) plays; no audible dialogue or sound from scenes]

[dialogue from film 'My Darling Clementine' plays in background whilst Hawkeye whistles]

[music is interrupted by the sound of a record being ripped or pulled off a record]

If you just feel REALLY generous to the audience and really want me to love you, please feel free to put tone that I might miss, such as [Hawkeye whispers] or [Klinger shouts]. Maybe it's visible on the screen from expressions/body language, maybe not.

Hawkeye: [imitates Groucho] Hello, Room Service? Send up a larger room.

Hawkeye [imitates British accent:] [drops accent]

And, when there may be confusion on when characters are speaking. Examples:

[Multiple characters talk at once.]

Potter: [speaks dialogue from 'My Darling Clementine' at the same time as a character in the film]:

Margaret [interrupts Frank]:

Hawkeye and BJ [speaking together:]

Also also, if there are multiple speakers, please show this. [speaker 1: ] [Speaker 2]:

Even if you don't receive a request from anyone to put on captions, please just add captions. Simple accessibility considerations, please. Some people don't even realise they need captions until they see then and go 'oh, yay. Captions.'

I know it may take a little bit of time and planning, but there are more of us out there than you realise. So please, just add captions.

If you ever doubt how important captions might be to someone, sometime just put on a video. Put on an episode of a show you haven't seen before. Mute it, watch it with no captions. See just how much you manage to get without ANY captions.

CAPTIONS.

CAPTIONS.

[charrfie]

no offence but the fact that normies found clinical trial is my 13th reason

Please forgive me anonymous, your use of the word "normies" made me giggle quite a bit..... but rest assured I understand your sentiment and I most definitely agree with it (even if I wish you had been a little nicer about it, lol). I have a lot of issues with the way clinical trial has been approached by a vast majority of fans, honestly. It's hard to know what to start with even. But I do feel that at least part of the reason people have had such a hard time understanding the source material is due to popular creators covering the game and exposing it to a general audience that otherwise would not engage with the game. Not to say I find said creators themselves at fault for this, since it's partly the reason I discovered it as well. It is a double edged sword, for sure. And there are a lot of people who DO understand it! Excellently, at that! This just sometimes seems difficult to appreciate if you- like me- check the tags every morning/night like the newspaper and come across multiple posts in a row either misinterpreting characters personalities, intentions, or.... you know. A million other things. Expected for a game with layers of nuance intertwined with each story beat, but still. For those that do understand, I appreciate you haha

One thing that I believe a lot of people don't understand when analyzing the game is that..... it's not exactly meant to be. Pretty? I guess? And that's part of the reason I connected with it as much as I did. In a majority of the media I've come across in my lifetime that has to do with people who aren't "good" at being people (for lack of a better term), never have I seen something so shamelessly depict the way isolation and mental illness make an impact on every single little aspect of someone's life. There is no self-censoring, no cushioning of the blows, nothing. And its fucking genius!!!!!!! I have seen so many arguments about angel's reactions to certain things being outlandishly stupid, lee's actions making him undeserving of his true ending's fate, etc, but I couldn't disagree more!!!!!!! People are weird. Weirder, when they are lonely and often taken advantage of. And that is SUCH a core part of what clinical trial is all about. The game makes you sit down and swallow the fact that lee is not an innately evil person without feeling the need to make his actions more palatable. Without making angel need to excuse it. Clinical trial has such respect for both parties and their feelings/experiences/autonomy, while not needing to say "this is bad" or "this is good" about anything. And especially when handling such a delicate topic. It's fucking genius. And I could talk about it for forever. But before engaging at all with ct, people HAVE to acknowledge this shit. That maybe good people can do bad, bad things, and that maybe "good" and "bad" aren't concepts applicable at all sometimes. Maybe sometimes, people are just people.

This sums up my thoughts on the general game here well enough for now (especially given how short of an ask it was haha), but before I conclude this post I do have to speak on how much the common perception of angel's identity bothers me. Especially considering how much of a core element of the story it is; I would be remiss not to bring it up at least once. Please note that I very intentionally use the word "identity" here rather than "gender" because that's only a singular element of who they are as a character. I'm talking about everything: their identity as someone that's mentally ill, as someone who's physically ill, as someone nonhuman, and as a nonbinary individual. Even still, I leave certain facets of their identity out that I can't possibly cover in the scope of this ask right now!!!! But bear with me in what I do feel equipped to talk ahout currently.

It is- without hyperbole- IMPOSSIBLE to understand angel without taking into account all the external and internal factors impacting who they are, what they think, and what decisions they make. IMPOSSIBLE. You, the person reading this right now, are an individual with YEARS AND YEARS of experiences, memories, and interests. The way your brain works, how you label (or don't label) yourself, how you think and do things, how you even talk... ALL of this is a culmination of the people you have known and the experiences you've lived through. That is a beautiful thing. A gift. Would it not be ridiculous of someone to claim that all of that is entirely irrelevant in the way you live your life? You might think that asking you to understand everything intricacy of a character before engaging with the material they're from is asking too much, but I disagree!! Clinical trial is about complicated people and complicated relationships that have been molded by their surroundings. I do not feel that asking that be acknowledged is a bad thing. Do your reading homework to prepare for the quiz, essentially.

All this is to say that I wish- just once- people would consider why angel chooses to act the way they do. I wish I could see even one piece of art of angel having to get up slowly from seated positions or wearing compression stockings all the time lest their orthostatic hypotension gets the best of them. I wish the shit that messed with their every action in the game had more of an impact in the fan media I see. I wish people might stop addressing them as human at all, because when angel says that they feel inner peace thinking of existing as an animal, that's not symbolism, that's not metaphor, that's truth. I wish every other post I see of them wouldn't address them as a girl or a boy. I wish nonbinary people stopped getting fucking erased. I get wanting to project. I get wanting to see yourself reflected in fiction. Trans representation is much more rare than cis rep, but I promise you there are infinitely more binary/binary-leaning trans characters for you to project onto than the things that I and others have. I wish people would GET who angel was before bothering to have anything to say about them.

I think angel and lee are some of the most authentic and transparent real life people I have ever seen in fiction. It is a crime they are difficult to be recognized as that.

I fear that I sound sort of pretentious talking about the game in such a manner as this but....... alas. I am allowed to be a little bit pretentious about media that speaks to me on such a level, I suppose. Please don't think I mean to diminish the efforts of those who DO get it. All of your work is fantastic. At the end of the day, this is just the internet. You are allowed to have fun on it. I am in no position to stop you. I even hope that you might find the joy you seek in doing so! But if I might ask you to consider the story and characters with a bit more depth.... I would very much appreciate the effort :^]

I hope that for both your sake and mine, anonymous, that people will start engaging with clinical trial in a better, more earnest way soon! Thank you for your ask~ peace and love

[olderthannetfic]

My two favourite things in the world are both books that have all the elements that I enjoy, and I mean this in the sense of both the ID-gratifying elements like whump and fucked up intriguing character dynamics, and broader and more poignant topics about society and humanity and how it all functions and also some fucking beautiful writing.

Thing A has a massive fandom, whereas thing B has a fandom of like 20 people. This is due to several factors: A got an adaptation and lots of promo, and is also in a genre that doesn't seem intimidating and that fandoms tend to like interacting with, whereas B begins in a way that feels too highbrow/complicated so loads of people bounce off of it even though in the end it has more or less the same mix of ID-gratifying elements and poignant commentary on human nature.

I need to be clear that it's the combo of the two (+the sheer quality of the writing and plotting) that makes those books my two favourite things ever. There's just something very comforting about a work of art that effortlessly gets the things that you perceive about the world at large and find important but ALSO includes all your favourite kinks and trashy romance dynamics.

Now, you'd expect the fandom A to water down the source material and reduce it to incorrect quotes but there's actually a large and quite popular contingent of people engaging with the more philosophical/moral/sociological themes of the work, with excellent quality meta that gets as much traction as the cutesy ship fanart and people going apeshit over the whump and the meowmeowness of the morally questionable characters. There's arguments and fandom drama as well but I cannot describe how much I fucking love it there simply because the average fan understands the source material fairly well and is ready to engage with all of its elements, hot romance and whump and reflections on human nature and all.

OTOH fandom B tends to attract snooty intellectual types - and you can immediately tell from the profiles that they're snooty intellectual types. Lots of people calling themselves "bluestockings" and having the most stodgy upper middle class academia person attitudes imaginable. Which makes sense because you need to have a certain level of... confidence in your ability to comprehend complex things in order to not give up on the canon material halfway through? There's a very prevalent attitude of thinking they're cooler than other people because they're into this super deep and complicated thing.

The funny thing is that they seem to absolutely refuse to engage with the actual themes of the work and insist on mangling them and misunderstanding the characters to gush over the whump and the toxicity of it all. This, combined with the small size of the fandom, and the snooty intellectual attitude (sensitivity to opposing opinions because they've built their entire personalities on being Very Smart and Always Correct included!), and the frequent incapacity to comprehend that sometimes the grey morality and ambivalence is ON PURPOSE, makes me very reluctant to engage with the fandom at all even though the brainrot about the canon material is by this point an integral part of my soul.

I go into the tag almost every day - it gets a couple of posts per week from the same 15ish people and almost all of the ones that aren't jokes that fall flat misunderstand the canon while being obnoxious and snooty and gatekeepy as fuck.

Whereas in fandom A nobody's really putting on airs - they're all like "yeah we like this popular thing, isn't it cool! let's talk about the cool thing!" I don't know what my point was with all of this, beyond the fact that, man, I WISH fandom B were more like fandom A and it makes me sad that it's not.

I just want more cool people that I can discuss shit I like with, yeah?

(funnily enough I'm pretty sure that like 50% of fandom B are also at least casual fans of A, or at least A's mid adaptation, they just don't often have a lot to say about it.)

--

*id

[brw]

Man, how do you even tell if something is "in character" for a comic book character? Especially the really old ones. There's been so many authors and artists not only building off each other but contradicting one another. Do you just pick out the runs you like? What if the run you dislike is important? What a mess

I mean, yeah. When dealing with characters like ones from very long running comic book series' that involve many different writers, artists, other creators, with various different politics, backgrounds, expectations and opinions to show through their writing through the medium of a shared universe in comic books, conversations around characterisation become very murky. But to me, that's part of the appeal. I think if you're getting into an old, established shared universe like Marvel Comics or DC with the expectation that everything will be canon all the time, or that characterisations of characters who have been in consistent publication for years, decades, and in some cases, coming up to centuries are going to stay static is one that is going to set you up for failure, in which case company-owned shared universe comics as a medium may not be for you. And that's okay! They don't work for everyone!

Something I think about a lot is that everyone has their own sense of canonicity, of which events do and do not matter, and that extends to writers too and it's important to sometimes approach things from the perspective of where they might be drawing certain things from. Comic book writers and creators aren't just like, people who have been living and breathing comics since birth (although some, like Jim Shooter, are). Taking for instance, Sabertooth. Did Victor LaValle write the most canon Sabertooth ever to exist? Probably not! But LaValle as a horror writer, as a very politically conscious and acclaimed novelist, has other things to say about Sabertooth than following every single comic published before him, and we have an incredibly fascinating and beautiful story for it. The opportunity to have interesting artistic and novel ideas explored just as much as the people who are clearly more based in the actual lore and history of comics like an Al Ewing is what makes this genre so wonderful to me. Each can have their own space, and sometimes even within the same character and the same team.

And yeah, there is an element of picking and choosing, but I also don't think it's right to like, dismiss anything outright. If you have to dismiss a lot, after a certain point you don't actually like the character you're reading, just the idea of them, which I think is where problems arise and where maybe more singular visions in books or creator-owned comics might suit someone better.

It's difficult with comics because you aren't ever dealing with comics in a vacuum, either–the biases of comic creators and their politics always colour their writing. I've been talking a lot about Charles Xavier for example, and he's a good example of this, because he serves equally as a mouthpiece for tolerance and acceptance for writers, and as a scapegoat for their political or personal frustrations. He is often a representation of a writers' disability politics and perspective on wheelchair users, regardless of if that's something they knowingly engage with or not. And you can't really disentangle Charles' character from ableism, because so much of his character has depended on tropes surrounding the disabled body. So trying to engage with Charles outside of this context, ignoring the ableist tropes inherent in his writing or erasing his disability outright, by both people who love him and people who hate him, leaves so much out that after a certain point you're not engaging with this character at all, you're just looking at a very vague representation of him built from your own expectations and opinions and not what the reality of his character looks like.

It's a difficult topic, and I don't really have a straight answer for you. Because on one hand, I do, as I said, think it's wrong to dismiss textual history outright, or to make blanket statements over certain eras or periods. Like, I've talked before about Claremont's racism and Zionism, which has infected the entire X-Men because of how much contributions he made to them as a franchise, but Claremont X-Men is still like, Good. It's Zionist, and racist, and incredibly fetishising towards Asian people and black women, and those are inherent to it, but there's a reason why that run is as acclaimed as it is, because even with that baggage it is still a story people love and people come to and people want to talk about. Things don't become massively popular across generations without having some artistic merit, something that speaks to people.

But, equally, striving for more tolerance, and making a safer, more open, more critical space in comic book communities is necessary, and a very important step in that process is acknowledging the sordid past of a lot of our favourite comics. Enough time has passed that people are willing to acknowledge that while the contributions made to comics by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby are impossible to overstate, and that those comics are artistic and beautiful and strange and have a very important place in the history of pop culture and American culture as a whole, they also are deeply misogynistic! They have very flawed opinions and perceptions of black people, and there's a host of anti-communist rhetoric that spins into active sinophobia. And we're having those conversations more and more, which is good, and necessary to start reappraising these comics and creating a better environment moving forward, but it's important to keep up that momentum for the likes of a Chris Claremont or a Grant Morrison.

There's not really a clear answer I can offer you, ultimately. To a point, it is a choose your own adventure story, but to another, comic book history is a complicated, ever changing and ever fluid thing, and dismissing parts of it to preserve your opinions on characters that are ultimately fictional takes away from what makes this kind of comic book interesting to me, and what makes it a unique creative medium.

[skibasyndrome]

I wanted to ask your thoughts about a topic that I think might resonate with you since a lot of your writing surrounds it and since you talked about it the other I thought it'd be nice to hear what you have to say.

I grew up feeling very ashamed of having sexual feelings, and other things taken in account made me really repressed. For a very long time I didn't even admitted to myself I was queer until I was actively in a fandom with queer people.

But sex in general was always taboo regardless of gender but for some reason young royals has destroyed a bit of the misconception I had around it. The show in itself depicts a beautiful and safe environment for queer sex which I'll always be so grateful for.

And then fanfic came along and that was another block taken down because fanfic allows us to be even more free in our writing etc but sometimes I feel conflicted about how it can feel good to feel this free reading about these characters but irl still have this block.

Your writing is so amazing in that regards because your character are exploring it all and I don't know how it would be if writers would stop themselves from writing what they'd want to bc they're afraid of what others might think... I wouldn't have read all these stories and felt myself freed from societal rules of what's okay and isn't.

But sex is also drench in shame regardless bc if you like kinky stuff your weird, if you like too much sex then it becomes dangerous. But writing about those very things feels like a rebellious acts, do you agree? It's like art can do so much and sex in that regard is something we have to push through as well in order to make our point across like there's nothing wrong with it but why do we hold on to the shame more ? Of course we can keep it strick to fanfic I don't expect you to reveal yourself etc I was just thinking about the way yr is different in that concept because it challenges us to see sex differently because Wille and Simon see it differently, does that make sense ?

Hi, dear anon! Thank you so much for sending this in and for trusting me with it 🫂💜 I definitely have loooots of thoughts on this, and I hope that I can express them coherently. Sorry if this gets rambly!

First of all: I'm very, very sorry that you grew up with all that shame around sex and sexuality around you. I'm really happy to hear that things are better now (at least the part about admitting to yourself that you're queer 💜) You deserved better, everybody deserves better. But I relate to that a lot. I grew up in a politically and religiously conservative environment, so of course sex was something people got shamed for and homophobia and queerphobia was rampant.

Interestingly enough (or maybe it's not that interesting at all, who knows) being in a fandom did the same thing for me, except I got lucky because I was able to find a place in a fandom and with fellow queer people at a pretty young age. I think without that, I would've had a way harder time coming to terms with my queerness, even though I remember already thinking about it when I was like eight or something. It's absolutely invaluable to be able to get a sense of community like that and to know that there's more out there in the world, be if for you and your own identity or just what's possible for humans in general. I'm endlessly grateful for fandom and especially for fanfic for being able to provide that!!!!

And the funny thing is, even though this is far from my first fandom and far from my first time engaging with queer content there was still something incredibly special about Young Royals and the way (queer) sex is treated on the show (and I know it's not just queer sex, but that's kind of the lense I use to look at it, so I'm going to be focusing on that). Like... even though, technically, I had it all more of less figured out already, the show did change something for me, and even 1,5 years later I'm still struggling to put it into words. But there's something about the way the sex is depicted that makes it so... uncomplicated? Like, even though the sex is very central to the story, to the way Wilmon connect, and to one of the main conflicts (with the video tape), it's never an issue in itself. They're both so quick to admit it, they did nothing wrong (maybe... maybe the most important line of the whole show to me tbh). And even though shit hits the fan because of the video and they both go through hell and back in all kinds of ways because of it, there's never any inherent shame around it. It's so different and refreshing in that sense - these two guys like each other, so they do what feels right for them, and there's no issue with that. It's almost... celebrated? Is that the right word? throughout the show, it's what they do for comfort and connection and to feel closer to each other. I don't watch nearly enough tv or movies to really know if that is overall as revolutionary as it felt to me in particular, but... yeah. For me, personally, that was one of the first times queer sex on screen looked like that. It really is exactly how you call it, beautiful and safe!

As for the freedom that come from reading fic: yep. hell yes. That is definitely a big part of why I love writing and reading fanfic. It's freeing, in so many ways. Of course that's not something that's exclusively limited to fanfic, and you will always find me talking about the inherent emancipatory potential of art of all kinds, but I do think that, especially compared to what you'd call traditionally published (romance) books, fanfic has a lot more freedoms. Fanfic writers have the possibility to publish the most self-indulgent stories ever, we don't have to tie everything into a neat bigger plot, we don't (unless we struggle with perfectionism, but... you know) have to try to make the story perfect or fit into any of the molds traditional publishing or literary history provides for us. We can create straight from the heart, on a whim, to work through shit or to ask questions or just because we thought of something interesting and couldn't let it go. And, when it comes to smut, we can just (again, theoretically, I won't pretend there aren't always all kinds of pressures that do influence what people feel comfortable writing and publishing)... write whatever.

It makes it easier to explore things that other types of media don't always give people the space to explore, like smut, kink, queerness, all sorts of different forms of relationships. And I think it gives a lot of writers the time and space to just explore. And I think that's something more people should be allowed to, both in fiction, but also just in their minds or even in life, explore. This can mean all sorts of things, but I also very much mean those things, sex, kink, queerness, relationships, etc. But especially for people who don't have the means to get into these things themselves, for all kinds of reasons, but also for people who don't really want to explore things as themselves fic can provide a safe space. Because you do get a close insight into things you've maybe never seen before or even thought about before, you get to experience them alongside the characters, and it can go all sorts of ways. It's safe, because you're not putting yourself on the line, but you're also right there, emotionally.

And that is not to say that reading smut is something that has to do with personal sexuality for people (although I think it absolutely can), but it's like a playground to just. Exist in. See what happens. Enjoy the variety of ways human beings can express their feelings for each other, enjoy the variety of ways human being can experience joy and connection and pleasure, or even the more difficult emotions. It's cathartic to be able to see all that.

I think that is also where the difference between reading about characters experiencing these things vs trying to face them in real life comes in, because fic is such a safe means of engaging with (sexual) things. It makes sense that it's easier to enjoy these things theoretically. Because even after we go through all these efforts of trying ourselves out and deconstructing the harmful notions and the internalized shame and then things society or our parents of whoever got into our heads instilled in us, they're so difficult to fully get rid off, and there's always more puritanism of all flavors coming our way. Don't beat yourself up about not being at a level of comfort that you want to be at (yet), but I hope as time goes on this will get easier for you 💜 I know thus far this has been a very allo kind of conversation, but you know, even if sex isn't something you're interested in for yourself at all, there's still a lot to be taken from engaging with it through fiction I think. That's also part of the beauty, even if there's something you could never envision for yourself - you can experience if through art!

I'm so incredibly happy that my writing could contribute to you feeling freer yourself, that is an incredible compliment and I appreciate you so much for saying it 💜 I really feel the same way about all the fic I've gotten to read, honestly. And I do love that we have fandom spaces to, for the most part, be able to read and write freely. I do think that's an act of rebellion in itself! Creating art is always rebellious in some ways, and art that you will not get paid for and thus don't have any restrictions on even more so (again, nuance, out there in real life art should get funding, but it should still always be able to exist independently of market pressures). I think especially in a society that's still so horribly sex-negative (because even though sex is omnipresent in a lot of ways there are so so soooo many restricting ideas tied to it, like for whom is it okay to have sex, how much sex, what kinds of sex etc) and queerphobic it's absolutely an act of rebellion to lean into these things and depict them as the beautiful and messy and amazing and complicated parts of human existence they are for many people.

And this is where I tie it back to Young Royals specifically: Again, not an expert on all things media depiction of queer sex, but to me personally, YR and Wilmon are revolutionary, just for the fact that their sex is so normal. Not in a normative sense (because, fuck that. there's no normatively normal way of having sex, it's all beautifully weird), but in the sense that it's just what they do. Because they want to, because it feels good, because they want to try things out, because it brings them comfort, all kinds of reasons! And it's never something they think they shouldn't be doing, it's never something they are made to regret. It's the people out there who try to shame them that are the problem, never these two queer guys having sex. That's fucking beautiful and comforting and will forever be one of my favorite aspects of the show.

[taska-rokanh]

Befriending Spock Headcanons

My first Star Trek content! Spock is my favorite character by far and I feel like he needs some love. A lot of my Star Trek content will be romantic, but I feel like especially with Spock, it's necessary to explore the first steps of just becoming friends, because it's harder to break down his walls and he's not one to just act on attraction at first sight.

Warnings: none

Word count: 1.1 k

- People have very different, often very polarizing opinions on Commander Spock. You'd heard more than enough stories about how cold, calculating, unforgiving, and inhuman he was. 

- But when you met him, all you could think was that he was so cool.

- He was incredibly intelligent, capable of making smart and informed decisions regarding basically any situation that affected the ship in minutes, and always acted with absolute certainty. Despite that, he did not want a command of his own and readily accepted his own mistakes, readjusting accordingly. What was there not to admire?

- You tried your best to be friendly, but you knew it was a long shot. Not only was he a Vulcan, he was your commanding officer. You weren't sure how he regarded any sort of personal relationship, really.

- Still, you found yourself engaging him in light conversation in the halls, the mess hall, or the lift. You broke it off quickly if it didn't seem like he wanted to talk, which surprisingly was very infrequent. If you got him talking about science, or the history and philosophy of Vulcan, it was quite easy to get him to talk.

- Spock is... I'm not sure how he would describe it, but I suppose, pleasantly surprised to find someone that not only tolerates his discussion of such topics, but actively pursues them.

- Whether you know it or not, you've chosen the most effective method of breaking the ice.

- Spock encourages this by consulting you on data that is outside of the normal scope of your duties as often as possible. He enjoys being challenged, and surmises that you must, as well. You have a natural curiosity and a scientific mind, one that with proper training could even attain his level of authority in time. These discussions don't feel like replacement training sessions so much as informal academic chatter, though.

- Spock starts to show that he considers you a friend through verbal encouragement first. It's often very dry and hard to detect, but it's there.

- He once corrected you regarding a postulation you'd made when analyzing some data that was adjacent to your field. You said, "Oh, right, that makes more sense. Sorry, I'm a little stupid sometimes," out of habit, something that you knew you should probably grow out of.

- He looked at you, perplexed. "Ensign, you should not insult yourself for being unaware of a highly specialized piece of information that allowed me to see the facts in this particular light. Every scientist, no matter how intelligent, has their blind spots."

- You smiled at his encouragement before raising your eyebrow in doubt. "Even you?"

- Spock hesitated for a moment before considering his ineptitude in handling his friendship with his captain and now, it appeared, you as well. "Of course."

- You didn't believe him, but thought it was sweet of him to say so. "Thanks, Commander."

- "You may call me Mr. Spock, or Spock, if you prefer."

- "Sure thing, Mr. Spock."

- The Mr. gets dropped shortly after.

- Every smile you manage to get out of him is an absolute treasure, as it is very rare. Something tells me that the first smile he gives you would be in a situation in which you are distressed and he is trying to reassure you, perhaps he sustained a nasty injury and you are very concerned. The smile is fleeting and feels a little unnatural, but the effort he put into it was enough to convince you that he would recover. little did you know there was little effort expended--seeing your care for him, it was almost irresistible.

- Every smile you give him is treasured by him, though they are so much more frequent. It is true that humans smile with so little provocation, but it's still nice to know sometimes that he's the reason and not the butt of some joke (looking at you, Kirk and Bones)

- There are two facts about Vulcans that are very relevant to this situation: 1) Vulcans are touch telepaths, meaning that touch is very, incredibly personal and reserved for special situations (except for Sarek and Amanda cuz they're whores), and 2) Vulcans are, in fact, very emotional people.

- Keeping these facts in mind, there must be some way for Spock to express his feelings of appreciation and camaraderie for you, and it cannot be in the average human manner (handshakes, pats on the back, high fives)

- So instead, he takes a more vested interest in your wellbeing, asking if you've eaten, drank water, slept, etc. especially when you've come back from an away mission and are busy analyzing new data.

- You often seem to find each other following each of the Enterprise's adventures. These are often time-sensitive and life-threatening, and as a low-ranking science officer, often your only orders are to stay put and protect yourself. 

- The first time or two after you've become friends, you try to hide how shaken you are--you know you're fine, really. You just can't help that your reaction to coming down off the adrenaline high is to literally shake and sometimes cry a bit.

- However, Spock sees through what you're trying to do and reassures you that you are safe. "I know."

- "I intended to convey that you are safe to express any emotions you may currently be experiencing."

- Oh.

- You usually end up sitting with Spock somewhere, your quarters, your lab, the mess hall, the holodeck, shaking and crying before recovering after a bit. The emotional expression always makes Spock a bit uncomfortable--not because he's disgusted by it, but because he doesn't have/doesn't feel comfortable expressing the skills or the emotional intelligence needed to interact with them. 

- His simply being there is enough. You recover in 15 minutes or so and can carry on as before.

- "Have you considered consulting Dr. McCoy regarding the management of your anxiety surrounding these events? They seem to cause you a high degree of stress."

- You shrugged. "It's just my body's response, it doesn't bother me," you reassured him. "Besides, I've got you."

- The feeling of being needed in a way not associated with his intelligence or his duty was unexpectedly welcome.

- In time, he comes to take a more active role, bringing you food and water while you're working or offering to make a bit of progress on your work while you take a short rest--Vulcans don't require as much sleep as humans, after all.

- After a while of this, you mention to him that you feel that you could be a more proactive friend, when he takes so much time and effort to look out for you, and ask him what you could do.

- He looks at you, perplexed. "Your presence in my life is quite sufficient," he assures you. "Your companionship proves to be a gratifying part of my daily routine in any measure."

- He has no idea how sweet he can be.