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#i say ''kinda-alien'' because like. he's an alien but also actually not really an alien at all. it's complicated lmao.
batsplat · 3 months
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casey also talks about sepang 2015 what do you think of that
oh in that podcast? uh... lemme listen again...
yeah idk it's not really anything new I'd say? he's said basically all the same stuff in more interesting and extensive ways elsewhere. I think casey inevitably has a very 'well feuding is bad and helps nobody' point of view, has expressed that before in the past, does it here again, and he's also drawn a parallel between himself and marc on several occasions. which... well, of course there's similarities in terms of public discourse or whatever, but the parallel really falls apart whenever casey argues the feuds cost valentino. like, I do think it's sometimes important to just. keep in mind. it's interesting that casey draws this comparison in his mind but that doesn't necessarily means he's right about this. I'm not sure how you'd argue that starting a feud with casey cost valentino anything competitively? you can argue it didn't help him I guess, and then we can have a debate about the ins and outs of the 2008 season. we can also have an argument that in a hypothetical world where casey isn't ill in 2009, valentino doesn't break his leg and casey isn't on a piece of junk in 2010, and valentino isn't on a piece of junk in 2011-12, then actually maybe valentino sparking open animosity with casey COULD have cost him. but we don't know that! didn't happen! I wish we could have found out, but we never got the chance! as it stands, the tally on this is pretty straightforward: casey won the title when things were reasonably civil between them in 2007, and valentino took control of the following season at the exact moment he worsened the relationship between the pair of them in 2008. obviously, it's all more complicated than that and casey would of course argue laguna didn't negatively affect his subsequent performances... but it certainly didn't help them. like, at the very worst valentino escalating tensions in 2008 is a complete net neutral. after 2009, them being bitchy to each other every other tuesday was completely competitively irrelevant beyond maybe affecting how they approached occasionally fighting for a podium position. hey, maybe casey used that feud to fire himself up through sheer spite throughout the later stages of his career, but that doesn't actually support his anti-feud stance - it's basically the exact same thing as what valentino does. they're both quite similar in that regard! always so hungry to prove a point, to show how someone else is wrong. kinda half the point with this feuding business is to get yourself going, get yourself motivated, yeah. he straight up openly admits to using yamaha's repeat rejection of him as a way of giving himself motivation, and at the end of the day that's really not all that different?
anyway, what else does casey say... oh yeah, that him and the other aliens were already kinda prepared for this and had learned vale's tricks. that valentino had only been able to get into the minds of the previous generation. welllllll *wiggles hand* sure, I mean, he did clearly have to change his approach... he couldn't just use the exact same playbook to get to them, either on-track or off-track. but that's why he did change up the playbook... again, whether you want to believe valentino won his final two titles 'in the head' rather than just through pure pace kinda depends on how you assess the evidence, but it is at the very least a debate. and, y'know, it's always worth remembering that valentino's most important mind games with casey didn't happen in a press conference... it was on the track. and the on-track stuff really is just embedded in how valentino approaches winning. speaking of aliens, this is what dani and jorge have said:
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like, valentino's entire approach to his riding, even to the way he's setting his bike up, is deliberately about directly fucking with you... he's not actually always trying to be faster than you as much as he's trying to give himself the tools to make your life miserable, to pressure you into mistakes, etc etc... and again, especially with casey (if anything because he was so mentally sturdy), the off-track stuff was really just window dressing. (I know they bicker a lot after 2009 but it's just so fundamentally irrelevant to actual on-track competition.) so you can be aware of those tricks, but it also doesn't necessarily help you when someone's being nasty to you on-track in a way you just fully do not enjoy. which is what it was like for casey! for casey, a lot of this comes back to the truly unpleasant context of how he was perceived by the public, how he was treated as mentally weak or 'broken' or whatever partly because he had the misfortune of coming up against a bloke who had the reputation for breaking rivals. I think it's quite natural to end up with a bit of a hardliner 'actually I've never been mentally affected by a result in my life' stance - and of course casey is a lot tougher than a lot of people give him credit for. that being said. sometimes your rivals affect you, shit happens, it's part of the game. it's fundamentally a nice idea to think that valentino's tactics weren't just morally wrong but also ineffective, which is kind of the appeal of this narrative, right? you want to believe you're above that, you want to believe you were adequately prepared and wise to valentino's tactic. it's unsurprising and understandable that casey does tend to tell the story that way, but again it's *wiggles hand* also hard to describe it as completely factual
uh. what else. oh I'm thrilled casey does canonically know valentino and marc were friends, he has said he wasn't following motogp too much during that time period so you couldn't be sure of that. does this mean anything? does it tell you anything? well, no, but it's just a pleasing thought to me. I like that. oh also 'provoking particularly aggressive riders isn't a good idea' is kinda a funny take from casey? like, he of all people would hate the idea of being cowed by someone's reputation like that... casey's right that provoking fast riders can potentially be dangerous, but y'know I do think that's probably not news to anyone almost nine years later. um. that's all I've got I think
#i will say idm getting asks like this AT ALL but i do hope that's not like. the only bit of the podcast people are paying attention to#my thing with sepang 2015 takes is that like... when's the last time anyone has said anything genuinely interesting about that event#which yes big words from the feud blogger... but in fairness a lot of the sepang 2015 stuff is from old notes. that's my excuse idc#but that's kinda the thing... i feel like i haven't really had a new original thought about the whole drama for three plus years#u do kinda run out. basically the takes say more about the person saying them than about the actual event at this point#which. yeah. casey's comments on sepang '15 are primarily interesting in what they tell you about how he feels towards valentino#mind u he's actually quite nice about valentino in this one? casey call him let's finally organise that dinner#heretic tag#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#oh casey does go on another spiel against riders who win at all costs. ships that passed in the night of feuds i always say#also he gets the age he enters the premier class at wrong. i held myself back in the last post from pointing this out for tonal reasons#but if people want my podcast hot takes. i do simply have to mention it. just to set the record straight here#'they battle for podium places after 2009' genuinely. twice. like the alien era giveth but a lot of the time it really does just taketh#somewhat ironically casey wins the duel when he's on the shitty ducati and vale wins the duel when he's on the even shittier ducati#whatever that tells you idk#casey was always promising the laguna rematch would've gone differently and I love that conceptually but also we just don't know#he was like next time I WON'T play nice and it's like?? omg what does that look like. casey what were you cooking#for ethical reasons it's probably fine but for character arc reasons it's objectively ass that casey ended up being able to do all his -#- racing in a way he was entirely comfortable with for his second title in 2011. like it's just a complete waste of a year#you have this whole thing building for four years and then 2010 comes along and it's like. well that's enough narrative intrigue now! <3#also casey/jorge are fundamentally too interesting as individuals to have had such an obscenely boring on-track rivalry and yet here we are#it KILLS me because if you rearranged it and made valentino's dogshit ducati years like. 2009 or something#and do a straight title fight between jorge and casey THEN I genuinely think it would've been way more interesting#the problem with valentino is that he is fundamentally the WORST imaginable character you could invent to be casey's foil#literally everything about valentino could have been designed to be a casey-specific nightmare#but unfortunately that also makes him objectively the most interesting rival casey could have gotten#like morally it's on the edge. but narratively? literally could not have gotten a better villain in casey's story#constantly dancing on this faustian line of having to imitate valentino to beat him while trying not to lose yourself... juicy
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blaiddraws · 2 years
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Wait I have no idea what is going out in the gunsmoke au, all I know is nobori is wanted, I have no idea what’s going on, can you give me the stupidest summary you have?
weird kinda-alien guy forgets he's an alien and lives in denialtown for decades when the nonhuman aspects start becoming obvious
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I'm just. like. do y'all even know how complicated all of this is going to be to explain to non-Who initiates.
#'yes see#there is an alien who travels through time and space#and every so often he changes his face#so while they're all /technically/ the same character#there are a whole bunch of actors who have played them#and they're all numbered to make everything easier#except we don't count the time the Tenth one kinda made a clone of himself#or the one who comes between the Eighth and the Ninth one#because they came up with him later on and also he used a different name so he's technically *not* ''The Doctor''#and then there are a whole bunch of them that happened before the First one but they don't remember being those ones so we don't count them#except by using the names of the actors who played them sometimes. and there's really only one of those anyway.#and also there are a few who don't actually exist in the main continuity#so those get called by the actors' names too#*and* in ADDITION to the one who's a clone of the Tenth one#there's also the one who came after the Thirteenth one who has the exact same face as the Tenth. but he's not the Tenth really.'#like. guys. really. WHO thought this was going to be a good way to get new people into the show again.#there's ALREADY such a learning curve for this show. and now they're gonna pull THIS on us.#I have a hard enough time trying to explain 'there's a time-traveling alien who changes their face' to my coworker#gurt says stuff#doctor who#the fourteenth doctor#david tennant#nuwho#classic who#tenth doctor#I don't even know how to tag this we still don't even know what we're CALLING him guys this is a disaster--#the power of the doctor#power of the doctor spoilers#I'm gonna stop tagging that soon I think#if they haven't watched it the only way they haven't had it spoiled is if they're off the internet. in which case it doesn't matter.
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waitimcomingtoo · 7 months
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And I’ve Been Meaning To Tell You
Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
Synopsis: you overhear Peter denying that he likes you so you go out with another guy, leaving him to crash your date and tell you how he feels
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“At what point does the staring because you’re pining for your friend become staring because you’re a stalker and planing on wearing her hair as a wig?” Ned asked after following Peter’s gaze and seeing he was once again staring at you from across the cafeteria.
“I don’t know. I think when I start wearing baseball caps and standing outside her window with binoculars.” Peter sighed happily and rested his chin in his hand as he continued to stare.
“But, it’s not gonna get to that point though, right?” Ned laughed nervously.
“I don’t know.” Peter shrugged. “She lives on a pretty high floor.”
“That’s not the answer I wanted.” Ned said quietly.
“I had a dream last night that I asked her out and she said “I’ll see you at 8” without ever telling me where we were meeting just like in the movies.” Peter said proudly.
“You should not be proud of that. Why don’t you just ask her out with your out loud words for once?” Ned asked him.
“Because the dynamic of our friendship will be-“
“-forever altered past the point of repair and things will eventually return to normal but never feel the same.” Ned groaned as ge finished Peter’s sentence. “Yes, I know. Thats always your excuse. But I really don’t think she’ll say no.”
“You don’t know that.” Peter insisted. “I can’t risk it.”
“Peter, it’s so obvious you guys like each other. She always laughs at your jokes and nobody, and I mean nobody, finds you funny. And I know you like her back because you stare at her all the time and got goosebumps that one time her ponytail hit you in the face.”
“It smelled like freedom and prosperity.” Peter whispered.
“So ask her out and smell her ponytail all the time.” Ned whispered back.
“I just can’t, okay? And I don’t even like her like that. So stop bringing it up.” Peter said and looked over at you again. He watched you leave a group of friends and walk over to him and Ned.
“But you guys obviously want to be together so why don’t you just be together?” Ned asked him.
“Because I don’t like her and she doesn’t like me, okay? That’s that.” Peter whispered harshly just as you sat down at their table.
“Hey guys. I’m pretty sure I just got a veinte out of one hundred on my Spanish quiz so.” You sighed and dropped your backpack on the table.
“Hi.” Peter’s blushed and smiled at you. Your bad mood quickly eviscerated and you smiled back.
“Hi Peter.”
“If you want, I can help you study for your next Spanish quiz. I took it last semester and did fairly bien.” Peter offered.
“Really?” You lit up. “Thanks, Pete. That would be so bien of you.”
“No problemo.” Peter said back.
“This feels…racist.” Ned mumbled as he watched the interaction.
“I, uh, I watched that movie you were talking about the other day.“ You told Peter with a nervous smile.
“You watched Alien? Did you like it?” Peter asked excitedly.
“I did but it made me kinda paranoid about, you know, aliens. But I liked the part when the alien came out of the guys chest. I never realized that scene was from that movie. I felt like I was finally in on the film bros inside jokes.”
“Yeah. I like that part too. I also like the part when he swam up the filters motor and stuck that pebble in there so the tank would get dirty and have to be cleaned, giving all the other fish a chance to escape.” Peter replied. It took you a minute to get it but when you did, you burst out laughing. Peter blushed at how hard you were laughing at his joke while Ned watched the interaction in disgust.
“That was not funny.” Ned shook his head. “Not even a little bit. It was a little criminal actually.”
“What? Yes it was. Peters always funny.” You insisted.
“Isn’t he though?” Ned faked a smile before rolling his eyes.
“Hey, back off. I liked the joke.” You defended Peter, making his blush deepen.
“Thank you. I like your jokes too.” Peter told you.
“Ugh.” Ned groaned. “This is revolting to watch. Why don’t you guys just get married already?”
“That’s not a bad idea.” You said. “We’d get a tax break, right? Whatever that means.”
“It’s when they break your taxes in half.” Peter answered.
“Oh, is that it?” You laughed. “Sounds about right.”
“I know because I took that accounting class freshman year. You weren’t in that class so you wouldn’t know.” He teased you.
“Hm. Is that the class they cancelled because not enough people signed up?” You teased back.
“Yep. That one.” He nodded. “Wow. The memory on you. You’d be an excellent gatherer if this was Hunter gatherer times.”
“Aw, Peter. That’s the nicest thing a guys ever said to me.” You smiled and touched your heart.
“If you liked that compliment I have like eight more in the chamber ready to go.” Peter told you.
“Oh my God. Just make out already. But not in front of my clementine.” Ned grumbled and peeled his clementine. You and Peter fell silent at his exclamation. Peter’s face burned with embarrassment while you avoided eye contact with either of them.
“I’m gonna go refill my water bottle. I’ll be right back.” You smiled awkwardly and quickly left the table.
“Nice job, Ned.” Peter hugged. “You just made her so uncomfortable she went to fill up a full water bottle.”
“I told you, dude. She obviously likes you. I was just pointing out the obvious.” Ned defended himself.
“She doesn’t like me.” Peter insisted.
“Are you kidding me? You just made a Finding Nemo joke and she actually laughed. Not even fake laugh. That was a genuine belly laugh at the worst joke I have ever had the misfortune of hearing. She’s down horrendous for you.”
“No, she’s not. She just sees me as a friend. And I don’t even like her like that so it doesn’t matter.” Peter lied in an effort to change the subject.
“You can’t hide the truth from your best friend. I see right through your lies. You like her. I know it and you know it. Why can’t she know it?” Ned asked.
“I told you to stop bringing it up.” Peter grumbled, growing frustrated now. It wasn’t uncommon for Ned to bring this up but it was happening more than usual lately and all it did was remind Peter that you’d never be together.
“But-“
“I don’t like her, okay? I never did. I don’t think she’s pretty, I don’t find her funny, and I don’t want to be her boyfriend. I don’t know why you don’t believe me. I swear, I do not like her like that. I never have, and I never will. Okay?” Peter snapped. Little did he know, you had come back to the table and heard his whole outburst. You blinked a few times as your stomach sank but put on a brave face and sat down.
“I’m back.” You forced a smiled but didn’t meet Peter’s eyes. Peter’s eyes widened when you sat down and he looked at Ned.
“How much of that did you hear?” Peter asked you.
“How much of what?” You played dumb. You had to pretend you weren’t crushed that the boy you’d been pining after for years just very aggressively confirmed he didn’t like you.
“Nothing.” Peter lied and exchanged another look with Ned. Ned shrugged before changing the subject to move away from the moment entirely. You pretended to listen as you tried your best not to look as disappointed as you felt.
Once your break was over, you left the cafeteria and went for a walk around campus to clear your head. You ended up on a bench and sat down before taking a big sigh. You hadn’t noticed the guy that was sitting on the other end of the bench, but he certainly noticed you.
“Hey.” He said. You looked around for who he was talking to but found no one.
“Me, hey?” You asked and pointed to yourself.
“Yeah. You, hey.” He smiled and nodded his head.
“Oh. Hey.” You smiled back.
“I’m Drew.” He said.
“Y/n.” You said back.
“What’s the matter, Y/n? You look forlorn.”
“Oh, it’s stupid.” You waved your hand.
“Not to me. Tell me about it.” He insisted and scooted closer to you. You looked down at the lessened space between the two of you and laughed shyly.
“It’s nothing. I just overheard my friends talking about me.” You told him.
“Oh shit. Was it bad?”
“Not necessarily. But it didn’t make me feel good.”
“Damn. That sucks.” Drew said. You nodded in agreement and an awkward silence fell between you.
“I like that shirt.” He said suddenly and nodded towards your shirt.
“Oh, thanks. I borrowed it from a girl I didn’t even talk to anymore.” You replied as you pulled on the shirt.
“Finders keepers.” He shrugged. “You should wear it when I take you out.”
“Why would I wear a shirt you’ve already seen when we go out?” You laughed.
“So we’re going out?” Drew smiled.
“I guess we are.” You shrugged and realized you had just agreed to a date.
“Cool. I’ll pick you up Friday.” Drew winked at you before getting off the bench. You smiled at the unexpected interaction before realizing you had not gotten a single detail.
“Wait, pick me up where?” You called after him, but he was already gone. You slumped back in your seat on the bench and felt an equal mix of confusion and excitement. Maybe this new guy was exactly what you needed to forget about Peter.
The next day, you sat with Peter and Ned at your usual spot in the lunch room but barely paid attention to their conversation. Drew had found you on Instagram and you’d been talking to him all day. Peter had noticed your thumbs flying around your keyboard and the smile on your face and felt curious and ever so slightly jealous about who was making you smile like that.
“Is that good with you Y/n?” Ned asked you.
“Sorry, what?” You asked and put your phone down.
“We were saying we were gonna get chicken wings and watch the Trixi Mattel documentary.” Peter informed you.
“Again? And I can’t Friday.” You told them.
“Why not?” Peter asked.
“I have a date.”
Ned and Peter exchanged a looked before started to speak at the same time. They both stumbled over their words and spoke over each other as they gave you all their thoughts and opinions on why you should not go on this date. You tried to cut in but Ned kept listing Criminal Minds plot lines where women were murdered while Peter asked question after question about the guy.
“Slow down. One at a time.” You shouted over them and they both went silent. You pointed to Ned to signal that it was his turn to talk.
“You have a date? With a human boy?” Ned asked in disgust.
“Yeah. Is that surprising?” You asked, sounding a little hurt that they were so shocked.
“No.” Peter replied and looked at Ned to signal for him to say the same so that you wouldn’t be offended.
“Yes.” Ned said immediately. “Who the hell is this guy?”
“Ned.” Peter said warningly.
“His name is Drew.” You shrugged.
“Drew? What’s his brothers name, draw? Stupid fucking past tense ass bullshit name.” Ned grumbled.
“Jesus Ned.” You laughed. “It’s a normal name. It’s short for Andrew.”
“Andrew?” Peter scoffed. “What is he, an apostle?”
“I don’t think there was an apostle named. Andrew.” You stated. “I think they were all named Mark. And like, John or something.”
“I don’t know. I wasn’t there.” Peter waved his hand. “Why are you going on a date with this potential psychopath?”
“Because asked me on a date.” You said simply.
“And you said yes? When we don’t even know this guy. What if he’s into hardcore drugs and wants to use you as a drug mule for his next big drug operation?“
“He seemed fine.” You shrugged.
“So you’re gonna risk your life going on a date with this lunatic because he “seemed” fine? What if he’s a cannibal?” Ned asked.
“I don’t think he’s a cannibal. He was just sitting on a bench on his phone.”
“Oh my God. He sounds completely insane. Check the sex offender registry for his name right now.” Ned instructed Peter. Peter started typing his name into his laptop so you shut Peter’s laptop with a roll of your eyes.
“Why are you guys being insane? I thought you’d be happy for me.”
“I’m about to end my life over this.” Peter mumbled.
“Me too.” Ned added. “What even spurred this reckless decision?”
“I don’t know. A guy hasn’t shown interest in me in a while. This guy did so I took a chance. Is it really that crazy?”
“Yes.” Ned said immediately. “You’re ludicrous for this. You are absolutely Pitbull featuring Ludacris for this. Saying yes to a date with a stranger. This girl has lost her damn mind.”
“How else do you meet people?” You asked them.
“You don’t.” Peter said a sarcastic laugh. you threw your hands up in exasperation and Peter and Ned exchanged a look.
“What he means is, you should try asking a friend out. That way, you already know them and know you won’t get diced and quartered into a bunch of little pieces.” Ned said kindly.
“Why would he dice me and quarter me? Wouldn’t one or the either be enough?” You asked.
“Probably not for this lunatic.” Ned laughed like it was ridiculous to suggest.
“I think you guys are over reacting. What if he’s just a nice guy wants to take me on a date?”
“No guy wants that.” Ned groaned.
“Wow. Thanks Ned.” You said sarcastically.
“What I meant was, Peter has something to say.” Ned said and pointed to Peter. Peter turned bright red and gave Ned an angry look.
“You do?” You asked Peter.
“No?” Peter replied.
“Right.” You smiled tightly and looked away from him, making Peter know he blew it.
“Where is the date?” Ned asked.
“I don’t know. Some frat house. He said his friend is having a party and he wants to take me.”
“A party? At a frat house? With underage drinking? Oh great. So this guy is a law breaker. He probably has an extensive criminal record already. And I bet it’s for the drug mule thing.” Ned insisted.
“We’re all 21. You literally turned 22 last week.” You reminded him.
“I don’t see how that’s relevant to this conversation.” Ned brushed you off.
“What kind of first date is a party anyway? A girl like you deserves to be taken on a nice, well thought out date that doesn’t involve getting drunk around strangers. If I was the one taking you on a date, I’d make a picnic of your favorite snacks and we’d eat it on the rooftop of my apartment while the sun sets.” Peter stated.
“But you’re not the one taking me on a date. He is. He likes me, you don’t.” You said sharply, making everyone fall silent. You hadn’t meant to snap at Peter like that but it bothered you that he was aggressively putting down your date after rejecting you.
“What? Am I wrong?” You asked the table.
“Peter.” Ned whispered but it was loud enough for everyone to hear. You looked at Peter again but he just couldn’t do it.
“No. You’re not wrong.” He said quietly. You nodded your head like you expected that before getting up from the table.
“I just wanted my friends to tell me they were happy for me. Instead, we just had one of the weirdest and least encouraging conversations I’ve ever been an apart of. I’ll see you guys later.” You grumbled and walked away.
“That went well.” Ned said once you were gone.
“She definitely overheard me. I totally hurt her feelings and drove her right into the arms of that cannibal drug mule. Why did I say those things?” Peter asked and rubbed his face in frustration.
“I don’t know man. I would have stopped at “I don’t like her” but you really went off.” Ned agreed.
“Because you were annoying me with how much you were asking.” Peter whined. “Oh God. What am I gonna do now? Shes gonna go to that party and fall in love with draw and forget all about me.”
“I’ll tell you what we’re gonna do. We’re gonna find draw’s party and crash it. And you’re gonna woman up and tell her how you feel.”
“How are we gonna find his party? We’re not exactly good at attending parties.”
“I have my sources.” Ned smiled deviously.
“You’re just track her location on snap maps, aren’t you?” Peter sighed.
“Yeah, I’m just gonna track her on snap maps.” Ned admitted.
When Friday came around, Peter and Ned were glued to their phones as the tried to find out where you were. Luckily for them, you had been posting a plethora of pictures of the party to your Snapchat so they easily found where you were. Unlucky for Peter, Drew was featured in all of the pictures and you looked like you were having the time of your life. Peter swallowed down his jealousy and got dressed to go to the party. He rehearsed his speech for you in his head as he made his way through the crowd. He finally found you in the kitchen in the arms of a girl he didn’t recognize. Your eyes lit up when you saw him and you tried to go towards him but immediately tripped over your over feet.
“Peter!” You cheered and threw your arms around him. The girl who had been holding you let go of your waist while Peter looked at her in confusion. You stumbled into Peter and had a hard time keeping yourself up straight
“You know her?” The girl asked Peter.
“Yeah. She’s my best friend. What’s going on? Who are you? And where’s draw?”
“I’m Serita. I found her all by herself. She seemed pretty upset.”
“Well if it isn’t Peter Peter pumpkin eater. He actually doesn’t even like pumpkin flavored things. He doesn’t like me either. He made that very clear.” You laughed and clapped Serita on the back. Serita looked at Peter in amusement but he was too focused on how drunk you were.
“Are you drunk?” Peter asked in shock.
“What? No.” You scoffed and nearly fell over.
“She’s wasted.” Serita told him. “I got her to drink some water by telling her it was a big shot of vodka.”
“I’m just here to feel the heat with somebody.” You said and held your hands up in defense.
“I’ve never seen you drink this much. What happened?” Peter asked you.
“Psh. I’m not as think as you drunk I am.” You denied the obvious with a wave of your hand. The action caused you to stumble again and you had to grip Peter’s shirt to keep from going down.
“You can’t even stand up straight. Where’s draw?” Peter asked again and looked around the room for your date.
“I don’t know.” You shrugged. “I’m pretty sure he left with that pretty red headed girl from our statistics class sophmore year. With that teacher who had that cat with a silly name. Remember him? What was the cats name?”
“Kitty puss.” Peter reluctantly admitted.
“Kitty puss!” You cheered again and nearly dropped to the floor.
“I got you.” Peter said and tightened his grip on you. “But if he’s on on a date with you then why did he leave with another girl?”
“Because he didn’t get what he wanted from this girl?” You shrugged with a sad smile. Peter’s eyes darkened and he looked at Serita with a clenched jaw.
“What did he want?” He asked her.
“To get her drunk enough to lower her standards.” Serita stated. “That’s what he does to all the undergrad girls on this campus. Or at least, he tries to. Girls his age know better and stay away from him. But unfortunately for your best friend here, she didn’t know about his reputation.”
“Sterling Knight should have had a bigger career after Starstruck. He was funny and could sing. I never found him all that handsome but he had star power. He deserved more from Disney and I’ll die on that hill.” You interrupted their conversation to say.
“That’s nice, sweetie.” Peter smiled kindly at you before looking at Serita again. “I’m gonna take her to the bathroom and try to sober her up. Thanks for taking care of her. I’m glad she had a friend here.”
“Oh, I don’t know this girl. I just noticed she needed someone and stayed with her.” Serita explained. Peter raised his eyebrows in surprise before giving her a grateful smile.
“Oh. Well thanks for noticing. I got it from here.” He said before picking you up bridal style. You laughed gleefully and wrapped your arms around his neck, making Peter turn red again. Serita noticed this and stopped him.
“Hold on. How do I know I can trust you with her?” Serita asked. “What if you don’t even know her and you’re just trying to do what Drew was trying to do?”
“I promise I know her. Look. She’s my lock screen.” Peter said and showed Serita his lock screen which was a photo of the two of you.
“Best friend, huh?” Serita smirked.
“Please.” Peter whined. “I can’t hear it from you too. I’m an idiot and I know that. That’s the whole reason I’m here.”
“Well good luck. She’s been talking about “my Peter” all night.” Serita patted his back before walking away. Peter smiled at that before carrying you to the bathroom.
“Is this how Lady Gaga felt at the 2011 Grammys when they carried her in in that giant egg?” You asked as you rested your head on Peter’s shoulder.
“We will never know how Lady Gaga felt while being carried in a giant egg at the 2011 Grammys. You’re just being carried by your idiot friend to a disgusting frat bathroom that probably has salmonella and syphilis all over it.”
“Romantic.” You chuckled and held Peter tighter. He shut the bathroom door behind the two of you before gently putting you down on the countertop. He started rummaging through the medicine cabinet while you swung your legs.
“My tummy hurts.” You whined.
“I know. Take this.” Peter instructed and handed you Tylenol.
“Magic beans?”
“Tylenol. Drink this.” He chuckled and handed you back the cup of water from Serita. You chugged the water with the pills and wiped your mouth before giving Peter a sad smile.
“How do you feel? Do you need to puke?”
“No.” You shook your head. That action made you nauseous and you hopped off the counter to throw up into the toilet.
“I had a feeling that was gonna happen.” Peter mumbled.
“Don’t tell Kitty Puss about what a wreck I am.” You pleaded and threw up again.
“I won’t.” Peter laughed and held your hair back.
“I’m gonna die.” You whined and slumped against the bathtub. Peter sat down beside you and got the hair out of your face.
“You’re not gonna die.” He assured you. “You’re just gonna have really bad breath and carpet burn on your knees.”
“I hate carpet burn.” You said and started to cry. Peter had a feeling the tears weren’t just from the carpet burn so he wrapped his arms around you.
“It’s okay. Let it all out.” He said softly as he rubbed his hand on your back. You wrapped your arms around his neck and cried into his shoulder for a minute before pulling away. He grabbed a tissue from the counter and wiped your tears for you.
“I’m sorry.” You said quietly as you stared down at your lap.
“What are you sorry for?”
“For going on this date.”
“No. I don’t want to hear that. You don’t have anything to apologize for.” Peter shook his head as he continued to dry your eyes. You pushed your hand away and held it so he would look at you.
“I do. I only went because I was mad at you. And I posted all those things because I wanted you to think I was having fun with another guy. But I wasn’t having fun. I was thinking about you the entire night.”
“Well you fooled me.” Peter chucked. “I thought you were halfway in love with this guy already. But why were you mad at me?”
“I heard you the other day. I heard you tell Ned you didn’t like me.” You admitted and gave him a sad smile.
“Oh, that’s not-“
“And it’s fine.” You cut him off. “I shouldn’t have gotten mad at you over that. It’s not your fault you don’t like me. We can’t help what we don’t feel.”
Peter stared into your eyes and saw a sadness he’d never seen you show before. You had sobered up a little but still weren’t completely there. He wanted to tell you how he felt, but he wanted you to be sober enough to remember it.
“So what happened to your date?” He changed the subject. You gave Peter a sad smile and shrugged your shoulders.
“He wasn’t much of a gentleman.” You admitted. Peters jaw clenched but he tried to remain calm for you same.
“Why do you say that?”
“I kept trying to talk to him and get to know him but all he wanted to do was get drunk. So I kept drinking whatever he handed me because I thought that would make me a more “fun” date.” You told him. You looked down at your dress and nervously fiddled with the hem of it. Peter stayed silent as he watched your eyes fill up with tears.
“I got all dressed up. I did my hair and my makeup. I tried to look pretty for him.” You said sadly. “But he didn’t even compliment me when he saw me. And he didn’t laugh at any of my jokes. I kept feeling like I was annoying him any time I asked him a question. But I was just trying to get to know him.“
“Well he’s crazy for not complimenting you. Because you look very pretty tonight.”
“Oh, please. My makeup’s running down my face and I probably have puke on my dress.”
“Doesn’t matter. You’re still the prettiest girl in this room.” Peter told you.
“I’m the only girl in this room.” You reminded him and pointed to the bathroom wall.
“Doesn’t matter. You’re the prettiest girl in any room you’re in.” Peter stated. That brought a smile out of you and you slipped your hand into his.
“You’re sweet.” You smiled in appreciation and gave his hand a squeeze. Peter squeezed you back before getting the hair off your forehead. You leaned into his hand and looked into his eyes.
“What happened tonight?“ He asked quietly.
“Well, once I was drunk enough for Drew’s liking, he asked me to go up to one of the bedrooms with him. I went because I thought it was because he wanted a more private place to talk. I thought he wanted to hear what I had to say. Imagine that? Imagine your date being interesting in something you had to say? But he didn’t care about that. He didn’t want to talk.” You laughed sadly before looking down at the floor with a heavy sadness.
“What did he want?” Peter asked and braced himself. You looked up and met Peter’s eyes with a sad smile.
“You know what he wanted.” You said softly. Peter gulped and nodded his head so you wouldn’t have to relive it. You let out a sigh and wiped your tears on the back of your hand.
“He didn’t even kiss me.” You laughed sadly. “He just shut the door and tried to unzip my dress. I pushed him away and yelled at him, and then he got upset that I was upset so he left me in there. I was too drunk to go after him so I just sat there for a while in the dark. By the time I came back down to the party, he was already making out with another girl.”
“What’s this guys problem? He got to take the most incredible girl in this city on a date and he blows it in every way possible? He’d be lucky to talk to you, let alone go out on a date with you. How could he not see what a privilege he had just to be near you?” Peter said with genuine anger.
“Thanks, Pete.” You chuckled and felt slightly better about the night. Peter was about to go off more until he saw the look on your face. You didn’t need to hear Peter’s gripe right now. You needed comfort.
“Should we kill him?” Peter asked after a beat of silence.
“I think so. Serita told me he’s got a bit of a reputation for this kind of thing. I had no idea.”
“I can’t believe Ned was right and this guy really was insane.” Peter said, making you laugh.
“I know. I guess this means we should listen to him more.” You laughed. Peter smiled at you before scooping you up again and kicking the door open.
“Woah. Where are we going?” You asked as he carried you straight out of the party.
“On a real date.” He replied and you fell silent. He carried you all the way to his apartment building and swung up to the roof.
“Stay here. I’ll be right back.” Peter said and he slipped out of his button down. He draped it over your shoulders to keep you warm before racing downstairs.
When he returned, he had a picnic blanket, his portable Death Star night light, a lunchables pizza, and two bottles of water. You smiled as he laid the picnic blanket down before patted the space beside him. You sat down and he wrapped a blanket from his bed around the both of you. You cracked open your water bottle and downed it while he put together the lunchables. He handed you one of the pizzas and you did cheers before silently eating them as the sun began to rise.
“Are you enjoying your meal, madam?” Peter looked away from the sunrise to ask you.
“Why, yes I am. This is one of the finer lunchables I’ve ever eaten. Compliments to the chef.” You played along.
“The chef thanks you kindly.” Peter replied and you both laughed.
A comfortable silence fell between the two of you for a minute as you watched the sky become pink. Peter looked over at you and felt his heart ache over the way the sun was lighting up your face with a warm glow. You were holding your blanket tightly around your body to shield yourself from the morning air and had your eyes shut to let the night wash away from you. Peter knew in that moment he was in love and it could not be unspoken any longer.
“So, uh, remember when we were in the bathroom before and you said we should listen to Ned more?” Peter began.
“That doesn’t sound like something I would say. But I guess so. Why?” You wondered and looked over at him. Peter looked you in the eyes and gulped.
“Ned was actually right about a second thing.”
“Two things? Is he going for a personal record?” You laughed. When you saw that Peter wasn’t laughing, you stopped smiling.
“What is it, Pete? Something bad?”
“No. Not bad. Just, um, just a little clarification, I guess.” Peter began.
“Clarification about what?”
“I know you heard me telling Ned that I didn’t like you. And I know that it hurt your feelings. Which I totally understand why it would. It was overkill. But what you overheard the was my frustrated attempt to get Ned to stop insisting that I liked you.”
“Oh. Okay.” You said slowly and never took your eyes off him. Peter stared into your eyes for the last time before everything changed.
“And the only reason he keeps insisting that is because it’s true. He was trying to get me to tell you how I felt and I snapped at him because I was scared that if I ever did tell you how I felt, you wouldn’t feel the same.” Peter finished. You stared at him for a long time but Peter couldn’t read your expression. You were definitely pensive but he didn’t know if you were upset with him or relieved to know the truth. You turned your face back towards the sunrise and stared out at it.
“Hm.” You hummed.
“Hm? That’s all you have to say?” Peter asked nervously.
“Sorry. I was just thinking about that part in the movie Alien when the two main characters get directions from that school of fish and all the fish take the shape of an arrow to show them which way to go.” You said very seriously. Peter shook his head before cracking up laughing.
“Wow. Ned must be on a roll because hearing my own joke repeated back to me makes me realize how unfunny it was.” He admitted, making you laughing.
“I still laughed.” You shrugged. “Even if it wasn’t funny.”
“You did.” He realized with a smile.
“Probably because I like you so much.” You shrugged again and stopped looking at the sunrise to look at him. Peters smile grew and he reached over to hand your hand in his. All that pining and anticipation had led to that moment of you finally admitted how you felt about each other.
“Yeah.” He smiled. “Thats probably why.”
Tag list 🏷️
@thebookwormlife @imanativeofswlondondahling
@tom-hollands-wifey
@whatareyouhidingpeter @takenbyheartstrings
@imyourliquor-youremypoison @andreasworlsboring101
@peterparkoure
@justcallmehitgirl @jackiehollanderr
@emmamarshmellow @unbelievableholland
@sovereignparker @every-marveler-ever @undiadeestos @eridanuswave​ ​
@solarxmoonchild @canyouevencauseicant
@quaksonhehe @lovelessdagger
@thesuitelifeofafangirl @marshxx @nooneinvitedfascistbarbie
@maybemona
@alexxcorona113 @lethal-wisdom
@pandaxnienke
 @officialsimppage @peterbenjiparker @itsemohours
@freakofmusic25 @tomholland85
@olixerwxxd @leilanixx
@whereismytelephone @so-very-asleep @white-wolf1940
@spideyspeaches @hihiweezing
@mathletemadison  
@dhtomholland @insomniac-nerd-posts-things @prancerrparkerr
@hallecarey1 @adayasgeorgia @blackwidowisthebest @imawhoreforu
@ciarahollands
@nellabellaa @pinklxmonade @boogywoogywoogy
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lazycats-stuff · 6 months
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What about Batfam x male reader where the reader was actually the first child Bruce adopted and he was the practice child. He hated growing io because Bruce had really no idea what to do and then the other kids came along and now Bruce kinda understood what to do. He hates family time because he never felt like family, he was just some doll the others could practice on so later they wouldn't make mistakes. And i imagine at some point they snap. I feel like what if Damian brought over Jon for dinner and Jon was like "oh I thought Dick's the oldest, you never told me about (reader)" and reader just slams down their fist and goes to their room. At this point the rest of the family try to comfort them but the reader only screams about how they never were a son or bother, they were only a practice doll for them to use and then throw away
This has angst written all over it... Ah. Angst train it seems... Also, I think I changed the end a bit, but that's fine...
Summary: (Y/N) was nothing but a test child for Bruce. He finally lets them have it
Warnings: angst, resentment, author sucks at angst, but hey, I tried, yelling, mentions of anxiety, the fam is trying, (Y/N) is mad beyond belief, implications of child neglect... If you can call it child neglect.
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(Y/N) (L/N) was the oldest member of the Wayne family and the first child that Bruce had adopted. (Y/N) didn't have a good life at all before he met Bruce. (Y/N) could also argue that Bruce didn't treat him well as well, since being emotionally unavailable is not a good trait to have when you have children.
As the years went by, he hated growing up in the manor and with Bruce. He had food, a roof over his head and some sort of education. But that wasn't enough. The feeling of resentment that (Y/N) had has only grown as the years went by.
The feeling of being a test to Bruce, to see what he need to improve made his blood boil. He was a test pancake for Bruce and some sort of feedback to Bruce. It made (Y/N) mad beyond. Bruce could have gotten his shit straight when he started to have him as his legal child.
(Y/N) wished that he could forget everything about Bruce. About the family too. Even before Dick came, resentment building up in him nearly exploded. Looking back, he should have exploded on Bruce and Dick... Maybe even punch them. Maybe he should have done it.
When Dick came, (Y/N) saw signs that Bruce was improving, but he didn't show that to (Y/N). Years went by and Damian came. To say that Damian pretended that (Y/N) didn't exist is an understatement. (Y/N) tried to get closer to Damian, but Damian always pushed him away. (Y/N) took the signs and gave up, sadness and anger boiling inside of him. But he did observe Damian and Dick. In matter of a few days, they were close.
Dick did it without even trying.
So, (Y/N) has decided to alienate himself from the family, at least until he gets enough money to leave. Thankfully, the resentment towards Bruce and the rest of the family made him even put everything he had in school, even though no one cared about it. He had straight As and he was on his way to go to college that was far away from here. He knows that he can do it.
Even as Tim and Jason came, (Y/N) tried to be close to them, but none of them cared. None. (Y/N)'s solace became his own room and would avoid the family at all costs until it was time to eat where he had to step out. That only solidified the fact that he was going to leave as soon as possible.
Either way, he just had to alienate himself and move out. Then, everyone in the house would be happy.
However, everything would turn on its head when Damian would bring his boyfriend Jon over to meet the family and by default (Y/N). If only (Y/N) knew what would happen.
Dinner rolled around and came down to eat. He didn't expect to see Jon, but was nice to introduce himself to Jon, trying to be nice and just get this stupid dinner over with. He put some food on his plate and just ate in silence while everyone else talked.
He listened to bits and pieces and just stayed silent. He finished his plate quickly and pushed it away and sipped at his water, just being polite and getting ready to leave back at his room.
" Damian, you didn't tell me anything about (Y/N)... I thought that Dick was oldest of the brothers. " Jon said and (Y/N) froze.
Damian didn't tell Jon about him...
(Y/N)'s anger boiled over and he slammed his fist into the table before standing up quickly, knocking the chair over. Everyone got startled at the actions and watched in silence as (Y/N) left the dining room.
After a few seconds they all jumped into action, trying to stop (Y/N) to comfort him. (Y/N) slammed the door of his room shut, locking to make sure no one could enter, before he broke down on his bed. He hugged his pillow and sobbed into it.
It shouldn't hurt like this. He should have been stronger than this. Not cry over them.
" (Y/N), please open the door. " Bruce said through the door.
" Please, we just want to talk. " Dick added and (Y/N) snapped at that, anger boiling over once again.
" Talk?! TALK?! Stop acting like you care! " (Y/N) yelled at the top of his lungs.
" We do care. " Jason started.
" You don't give a single flying damn about me! I was never a son or a brother to anyone! I was only a test toy to Bruce so he could see what he could fucking improve! I was never a fucking brother either! Damian fucking proved it! " (Y/N) yelled at the top of his lungs, tears streaming down his face.
Everyone stayed silent and (Y/N) sobbed his heart out. Damian swallowed hardly, realizing what he did and how that hurt (Y/N) deeply. Maybe he shouldn't have...
Everyone glanced at each other. They stayed silent as they listened to (Y/N)'s sobs. Just how much pain did they brought up onto him?
" (Y/N), look- " Bruce started and (Y/N) screamed again.
" Don't you dare care right now! I'm moving out in a few days anyway and I don't need your pity or apology! " (Y/N) yelled, trying to wipe the never ending stream of tears.
" Moving out?! " Bruce yelled, eyes wide in shock. He know he has no right to tell (Y/N) what to do, but something flared up in Bruce. " No, you're not moving out! You are going to stay put because we have to solve this problem! "
" Are you shitting me Bruce?! Work things out?! "
" I'm not shitting you! I have to make things right with you! You are my son too! " Bruce yelled through the door.
" I don't give a single damn about any of you! "
Bruce took a deep breath, trying not to explode. He knows he has no right to be angry, but (Y/N) was still his son. " (Y/N), I am your dad and we will solve this problem. "
" We won't solves shit Bruce! "
" (Y/N), please, " Tim started, but (Y/N) cut him off. " Shut up Tim! "
Tim bit the inside of his cheek and stepped back.
" (Y/N), " Jason started, " You need to calm down, you'll give yourself a heart attack. "
(Y/N) wanted to scream even more, but he felt like he was going to die from this situation.
" Shut up, all of you! "
Now Dick started. " (Y/N), we may have been bad brothers- "
" May have?! You were- No, you are the worst brothers! " (Y/N) yelled and clenched his fists as he started facing around the room.
Dick sighed and stepped back. At the moment, everyone knew that (Y/N) talking to them without yelling at them and more importantly, he needed to calm down first.
But with how much anger and resentment there is, it is going to take a while.
" Lets leave (Y/N) alone for a while. He needs to be alone for now. " Bruce said and gently moved everyone away from (Y/N)'s doors, who was inside, trying to breathe more normally. He felt like he was going to jump out of his skin in the next few moments. He calmed down after a while, but he was still anxious beyond belief.
Unfortunately, the threat of moving out is just a threat and not a promise. (Y/N) sighed as he sat down on his bed. It was a stupid move to say that while he didn't have everything secure yet. Stupid.
(Y/N) went to the bathroom and washed his face and drank some water, to soothe his soon to be sore throat. It won't be nice to talk in a few hours.
Either way, it's better than leaving this room in order to face his siblings and dad. No, they are just roommates here, until (Y/N) can move out and just finally cut them out of his life.
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yesimwriting · 8 months
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I feel like the reader in best friend!Felix is actually really smart, heck, let's say genius even, but is really oblivious when it comes to sentiment. The reader gives off nerd vibes, but they're so smart to the point it's a cool kinda thing. And if this was before Felix met Oliver, I feel like reader, like Farleigh, would get bad vibes from Ollie too but would be too shy? I guess, to say anything cause hey, they're new and stuff. I like the fic:) It's nice to read something like that, without the explicit content, I mean:D
A/n: omg love this,, definitely doing a bestfriend!felix blurb on this concept later, i just wanted to explore character dynamics for a second lol
fun fact: i originally pictured bestfriend!reader as a literal genius with -3 street smarts, it's just info that didn't make it into the fic!!
also i could see reader as being so smart they skipped a grade (if we want to add to the power/social imbalance by making reader a little younger, but not like weirdly younger) open to thoughts on this !
i picture bestfriend!reader as having an elle woods quality to their intelligence in terms of awareness (and maybe aesthetic, it is the early 2000's lol),, reiterating the most complicated parts of a lecture perfectly during a study session while half focused on applying lip gloss, aces exams while hungover (bc felix insisted on going out), and never registers how impressive all of it is
very much "what? like it's hard" but as literal as that statement could be
which could add to reader's shyness/uncertainty bc she forgets she's a little intimidating
okay but the potential of reader getting bad vibes from oliver if she became close friends with felix a little after oliver did?? too good
reader doesn't want to alienate oliver, he's the only one around felix that's also an outsider, that should make it easier to bond
but!! because reader is that smart, she has this gut feeling that tells her to keep him at arm's length,, but bc she's not the best at picking up on feelings, it's basically just that 6th sense thing that girls have that tells them when a guy has weird/unsafe intentions
bc reader can't articulate their concern, or understand it, they try to be nice, but oliver can tell that there's this distrust there
it drives him crazy
first of all, reader should be the easiest one to win over bc she's not one of the elites and she's a little awkward from time to time, it's frustrating that there doesn't seem to be a crux for him to use to weasel his way into reader's heart
oliver's aware that he can get close to felix without the others liking him as long as they tolerate him enough in public, but with reader, oliver knows more about felix's real feelings for them than felix does
that adds this timing element to the situation that’s stressful, because as soon as felix realizes how he feels about the reader, that will be that
meanwhile, reader is a little worried about being dropped bc of the tension between her and oliver, but oliver doesn’t fully notice that, he’s too distracted by his feelings
it's not fair, oliver "had" felix first, but oliver's perfectly capable of adapting to the situation, so he accepts it and looks at it practically
oliver knows that there is no fully "in" with felix unless you like him, so despite any resentment and jealousy he feels towards you, he decides that he'll do whatever it takes to get it
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no1deepspacehater · 7 months
Text
NSFW ABC's - Xavier !
A/N: Zayne is up next for this one! Minors look away ofc! Also some minor spoilers in letters E and K
Enjoy!
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Mostly, he’s so ready to sleep, but if that doesn’t fit your needs, he stays up for you. Need a shower? He’ll help you wash up. Something to eat? He’s not the best cook but cereal after sex always hits the spot anyways.
His most preferred aftercare is after a cold shower, you both just cuddle each other to sleep. You’re his favourite teddy bear to hold.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
For him, his arms. Strong and buff from years, and I mean years, of sword practicing. Upper body strength of the Gods, perfect for holding you up with he fucks you against the wall, or just caging you in while you ride him. Grip his arms in any position and he’s beaming.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Moderate amount when he cums BUT he leaks. One stroke and his dick is wet. Prefers to cum inside/with a condom just because it gets sticky and messy, but is SO more than down if you want him to cum anywhere else.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
While masturbating has accidentally came on one of the plushies you gave him. He fell asleep right after and it left a stain he couldn’t wash out. Said plushie is now hidden away where you’ll never find it, and when you ask him about it he always says he lost it.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
SPOILERS FOR HIS LORE!
Ok so here’s my headcanons, he’s either:
Has NEVER had sex because, well, he only wants you. Probably doesn’t watch porn for the same reason. Most knowledge he’s have is conversations with close friends but no hands on work.
HAS had sex before, but with previous lifetimes/timelines of you. Kinda more fun to work with this one because, he’d know all your sensitive spots, even ones you don’t know about. He’d now just how to rile you up and have you seeing literal stars.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
When he has energy or is in that type of mood: variations of missionary, I feel like he’d be into wall sex.
Other than that, as long as your on top of him and he could see your face, he’s happy. Sometimes he’ll let you do your thing while he’s being a little pillow princess, othertimes he’s the one in absolute control even though you’re above him.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Always light giggles here and there because you both are being so cute. Sometimes though he’s not serious but he gets in this focused/locked in type of mode when you both are having particularly passionate sex.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
HEAR ME OUT HERE!! Rarely clean shaven just because he’d literally rather sleep. It’s not a jungle, but definitely had to start keeping it lower when you both do start to get intimate. I’d say once a week at least, once every two weeks at least. Now listen closely, he’s got a happy trail, nobody argue with me. His hair down there is a bit darker/browner than his actual hair, but it’s still pretty light that if you look too fast you’ll miss it.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
He’s a sappy little alien boy. Always showering you with praises so most of the time you’re a smiling blushing mess, which makes him smile as well. Even when he’s being dominant he’s calling you cute little pet names, anddd he’s got that smug little snark that’s just waiting for you to challenge him so he could show you who really is the most powerful here.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
Doesn’t really do it much because sleep >> anything else. When he does have to release some pent up energy he generally just does it to get it out of the way and falls back asleep. Sometimes falls asleep dick in hand mid stroke.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
I feel like he would be into roleplay. It’d take him a while to bring it up, but once he does it kinda helps him to actually express his emotions more in a way? But having you dress up as different things turns him on as well (the maid outfit is not surviving the night).
Also hear me out on this I feel like he’d have a pregnancy kink. (SPOILER: Something about you both living long enough to have a family) You’d just look sexy with a belly to him.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
His or your place, where you can really let go. As for specifics:
The bed, the kitchen counter, the bathroom, the couch, to the windowww to the wall. As long as your both comfortable, he’s so down to screw you anywhere.
But thats not to say you both haven’t gotten... freakaayyy in the staff room closet at work once or twice... or five times.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Though he can just hear your name and he’s turned on, he particularly likes when you sass him back or give a little attitude. It’s like a declaration of sexual war between you two and he’s adamant that he wins.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Won’t bruise you too hard or hurt you in a serious way (like blood and stuff). He can’t, he just can’t. Hard choking as well is uncomfortable for him.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Lives for eating you out/giving head. Even if he’s too tired for penetration he’s got more than enough energy for you to sit on his face and just let him go wild. Or literally he’ll get on his knees and just keep going harder everytime you tug his hair when he’s hitting a sweet spot. Will literally overstimulate you every time because he’s just having so much fun.
As for receiving, he doesn’t ask for it much but would neverrr decline. He twitches so much and constantly has to hold himself back from bucking his hips up and shoving his dick down your throat. Hearing you swallow all of his cum makes him literally orgasm a second time.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Fast, no, rarely. Slow, sensual, rough in an almost primal like way but still soft? Yes! He needs to feel every bit of you, and make sure you’re feeling every bit of him.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Appreciative of a good quickie. Though he’s more qeen on having ample time to do with you what he wants, there has been situations where he’s had to pull you to an empty room and set a new world record for the both of you. Sometimes the both of you are at home doing the nasty when you get called to a mission, and then suddenly it’s a race for time lol.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
If it’s for you, he’ll try anything (within reason). He is a risk taker as well, because really to him it’s not a risk if he’s going to succeed anyway. Just has to make sure he’s thought of every outcome and weighed out the pros vs cons, which he can decide very quickly when you’re looking at him like that.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Depends on how much time between the rounds. After round one, let him take a quick nap and he’s back on it like white on rice. Anything more than that will require a full day of sleeping with cuddles with you.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
I feel like personally he never bothered with toys, but would not be opposed to use one on you. It’s like having another way to satisfy you (and tease you endlessly). He likes to feel your touch rather than a toy but he’s okay with anything you want mostly.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
He’s such a switch, honestly. One day he’s begging for you and the next he’s making YOU beg until you literally can’t handle it.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
This man is a moaner and whimperer. He tries to hold it back mostly so it’s a lot of hot whimpering and mumbling at first but keep riling him up he’ll get louder. Says your name like a prayer always.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
 Turns your plushies around before you guys have sex, all of them. He says he doesn’t want to taint their innocence.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Thick in diameter, average sized in length. Definitely a shower but it’s pretty like him in every way anyway. Has one (1) prominent vein that hits just right. Colour just slightly darker than his skin colour (he’s pretty pale so) but tip is a light pink (#E6C5AD, if you will). Turns more red as he’s about to cum/is stroking or whatever. Yes I have thought a lot about this.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Having to wait lifetimes for your lover can leave you pretty wanting at times. That being said Xavier doesn’t really indulge in himself too often, and he’s quite the sleeper so in general it’s pretty low. But it can lead to some fun times where he’s just teasing you forever.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Like a LIGHT. After proper aftercare he is ready for the nap of his life.
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llamagoddessofficial · 11 months
Note
Hey, how would the siren guys react to a whale shark mc? Heheee, :0 (whale shark face) fella
HEEEE
Sans: Since whale sharks are filter feeders, she's technically a mermaid!
I imagine that a whale shark Mc is incredibly chill and relaxed. She's very big, very beautiful, and very friendly... adult whale sharks don't really have anything to fear, so she's easygoing and sweet-natured with pretty much everyone.
She thinks he's handsome, and very smart. Orca would only pose a realistic threat to her if they approached in a big group, but he's alone- she's not even slightly worried. She asks him about life as a predator, his adventures around the world, she dreams of seeing the poles but she's not built for staying in cold water. He entertains her with stories of the arctic.
... Sans isn't used to encountering mermaids who aren't terrified of him. He isn't used to encountering sirens who aren't terrified of him. She talks to him like he's a normal person, engages with him... it actually makes him less insane and murderous, as it's the first time he's been treated like a person since his pod died. He naturally becomes deeply attached to her... she's delighted he wants to keep her company and she welcomes his presence. They're 'best friends' that travel around together. It's good that she's a filter feeder, because though he'd absolutely kill for her, he has no need to.
Red: Red loves a big beautiful lady. This is one of the fundamental laws of the universe. The bigger the better- and she's literally the biggest shark out there. What's not to love? He's head over heels. His only regret is that they can't seriously play fight, because she could probably snap him in half. That's hot- but it would be inappropriate in public.
She loves his attention. Sure, Sans is handsome, but... well, Red is literally the ideal by shark standards. Being a filter feeder doesn't make her resistant to his scars, his teeth, his charms. She giggles when he calls her majestic, she flushes when he says he'd like to sightsee coral reefs with her. But she doesn't really take his flirting seriously. She thinks he'd want a girlfriend who's more aggressive, an apex like him- someone with more 'bite'. She's seen how feisty female tiger sharks are. She's not like that.
Sans is absolutely seething that this asshole is trying to steal his girlfriend. They're regularly at each other's throats when her back is turned. It's very easy for her to break up their fights, though, since she physically overpowers them both.
Skull: Pretty similar to Sans, in respect to Mc being sweet and friendly has the dual effect of calming him down but also driving him kinda wild for her. Whale sharks do occasionally make dives to deeper water, so it makes sense their paths would cross.
He's enraptured. She's like a big, friendly angel, her pattern is literally rays of sun. He wants to be near to someone who isn't afraid of him. He's a little heartbroken he can't bring her food gifts, since they don't eat the same way, but pebbles still work. And he's deeply impressed by how much plankton/krill she can eat in one go.
Though the difference between them isn't as intense as it is with leaf sheep Mc, she's still a very pelagic creature, and he's a very NOT pelagic creature. She's fascinated by his completely alien, deep-sea biology. Lots of her being delighted by his light shows.
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lavaridgecookie · 5 months
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Horror Movie Time with Sonic F/Os
General imagines for watching horror films with Sonic characters! What types they're into, what kind of movie watcher they are, etc. I originally wanted them to be able to be read as romantic or platonic, but eventually I just kinda went full romance.
Characters: Sonic, Shadow, Silver, Amy, Rouge, Omega
Spoiler warnings for Poltergeist and Alien, and a very minor spoiler warning for The Thing
Sonic:
Is more a fan of the 'campy' horror movies, although he'll also watch slashers - they get his blood pumping and his heart racing, and he lives for that. He doesn't like seeing you actually afraid, so he'll definitely take your tastes into account when picking a movie- if you say no to a specific thing, he'll tease you a bit but he'll pick something else.
Does NOT like supernatural horror. He will not watch ghost movies. He won't watch movies about doomsday scenarios. Basically, if he doesn't think he could fight it off in real life, it horrifies him and he can't stop thinking about it. What if that stuff happened to him? Happened to you? Haunts him for days or months afterwards. You made the mistake of watching The Thing with him, and for three weeks afterwards you had to talk him out of making you do the blood test every time you were apart for more than 5 hours.
He's fine with werewolf movies, for obvious reasons. Been there, done that, still tries to use his foot to scratch his ear sometimes.
All in all, he just wants to have fun with the movie, and with you. If you say 'tonight, we are watching a bunch of Disney Channel Original Scary Movies and eating our weight in popcorn,' he'll be just as happy as if you wanted to watch every Halloween movie.
Shadow:
Is a more all-around moviegoer, although since meeting you, he's found slashers are harder to watch. He can't help but think about you suffering through those scenarios, and ultimately dying.
Meanwhile, he loves sci-fi and supernatural horror. He's a product of science, he knows what it can do, so he can completely relax when watching movies like Alien.
In fact, and he'd never tell you this, he likes that one a LOT more after meeting you. He can easily see you in Ripley's place- resourceful, smart, trying to keep everyone alive. Going back for Jonesy seems like something you would do. He likes imagining you, triumphant, coming home to him.
Shadow likes it a LOT when you cling tightly to him- you can grab his arm as hard as you want, you can squeeze him like you're a boa constrictor, whatever. It doesn't hurt him, he's the Ultimate Lifeform! He likes the physical contact that he doesn't have to ask for, but he also very much enjoys knowing he makes you feel safe.
You should definitely expect him to start appraising the movie afterwards- he doesn't actually care, but he wants to talk to you and he's not great at conversations without a set topic. Please indulge him.
Silver:
is kind of a weenie and and doesn't really like actually scary movies all that much. He's been through enough, thank you. He's much more of a children's Halloween movie guy- your Mostly Ghostlys, your Scary Godmothers, your Cry Baby Lanes. Basically, nothing scarier than Tremors.
If you do make him watch a horror film, he's shaking in the first five minutes, and once bodies start piling up he's crying into your shirt.
There is one exception.
He loves Tobe Hooper's Poltergeist. Everything about it speaks to him, and he loves sharing it with you. He'll hold your hand whenever Steve and Diane are supporting each other, and he'll pull you into his chest and hold you during the scary parts. Afterwards, he'll tell you about how he hopes you two can be together like that someday- how he'll never abandon you when things get tough, and how he knows you'll stick by him, too.
He likes it because throughout all the horrible things, everyone is looking out for each other. He loves that everyone lives. And if you like the movie, too? He's the happiest hedgehog that ever lived.
Rouge:
Is a big fan of slashers- the gorier the better! She's the kind to cheer when some idiot gets murdered. But she also much prefers watching them at home, with you. She wants her head in your lap, taking sips of red wine in between mouthfuls of heart-stoppingly buttery popcorn, just having a great time with you.
But, and you won't find this out on the first date, she's also a huge film buff and adores the cult classics. If you so much as mention cult horror, she'll start trying to get you to watch her Criterion Collection DVD of Hausu, and wants to discuss the finer points of horror.
And she is trusting you not to spoil her reputation by telling anybody else about this. Especially you shouldn't tell anybody that she LOVES Them!
She also really likes horror films with a romantic bent, and she keeps saying that she'll tease you during them but honestly when the time comes her eyes are glued to the goddamn screen... it's the perfect time to slip your hands into hers.
Amy:
Likes two kinds of horror moves. She loves psychological horror- it keeps her guessing, keeps her engaged. When you watch with her, she likes to voice her theories out loud, and loves to hear your thoughts on it!
In the same vein, she also likes cult classics- her favourite is the 1962 film Carnival of Souls. Expect a lengthy discussion every time you guys watch a more 'cerebral' film- she really does like to hear how you felt about it! It helps her feel like she can see into your world a bit better.
But on days where she doesn't have that much brainpower to spare, she really enjoys a good horror/comedy. Her go-to is the Three Flavour Cornetto trilogy, but honestly she's not that picky. You guys watched Werewolves Within together and about died laughing. The genre is basically the mental equivalent of icecream to her.
Whatever you two watch, you are smushed up together in one corner of the couch. Doesn't matter who's in front and who's behind, one of you has your head in the crook of the neck of the other.
123-Omega:
He also like slashers, and he's kind of unbearable to watch 'em with. Every time anybody dies, he either says 'That would not have happened to me' or 'I would not let that happen to you.'
It's kind of cute, but once you're an hour and seven deaths deep, it can get a bit annoying. That said, you appreciate him for who he is, so you knew this was a bit inevitable and you love him anyway.
Once you asked him what he would do to protect you from 'unkillable' slashers like Michael Meyers, and after a second of thinking, he picked you up, took you out to the gun range, put you down behind him, and proceeded to absolutely obliterate everything in front of him one long, sustained round of heavy fire. Probably used up at least $6k of artillery. He then turned back to you and stated 'Michael Meyers could not survive being turned into a fine mist'
You were still in your jammies, and you couldn't help but laugh so hard you fell over. God bless your loving sentry turret.
~~~
Hope you all enjoyed! These were fun to write for, and I'd definitely be willing to do more for other characters if requested!
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dreamerinthemoonlight · 5 months
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Love and Deepspace Guys with an S/O that Craves Affection
Original Ask:
੭ ᐕ)੭*⁾⁾hii! i just wanted to say that i lov your works, especially the love and deepspace hcs, and i wanted to request the Love and deepspace boys with a reader who craves attention and love because they never got it from their family.
thxx have a wonderful dayy!
CW: none? Maybe hurt/comfort, gn!reader
A/N: hoenstly, this one was a little rougher to write. Not that I mind, but I'm fairly familiar with the feeling, and dredging up old BS is never fun. That said, I like imagining our boys in these kinds of situations. It's very theraputic
Requests are OPEN
Rafayel
Honestly, I think of the boys, he's the person who would have the hardest time
It's not that he's not affectionate, but part of his personality is that indirect, teasing method of communication
In this particular situation, I feel like you would need a very direct form of affection
I do think fish boy would be very willing to I've that affection, especially in a physical form. He seems like the sort who would really enjoy cuddles, but getting praise and affection directly is not going to be as easy
If you're direct about your needs, however, he will do his best. He doesn't want to alienate you and he really does want to give you the best he can
On the other hand, 100% expect him to give your family no respect whatsoever. Raf is totally willing to be rude and even more aloof than he is normally and he may very well not even give them the time of day
Your family wants to visit? Nah. He's just going to recommend a visit to the beach instead. If you are, somehow, on good terms with your parents he's going to take a lot of persuading to get into the same room, much less be cordial. Granted, it's hard enough to get him to consider a social engagement to start with, so that's not really a deviation from normal behavior
Xavier
Sweet, sweet, sleepy Xavi is the exact opposite of Raf. He is amazing at this, in part because affection comes very easy to him--at least after you get together
He is super fond of cuddles and time spent together and anything like that, so giving it is a natural extension of that
I will say, he's not as verbally expressive (it's kinda hard when he sleeps so much) but given that his favorite pillow is probably you, I think the point gets across quite well
The one downside is that sometimes you can be feeling particularly in need of attention and affection and well, he's asleep. Or at work. But probably asleep, so he's a bit unaware
Of course, he's totally down if you tuck yourself under his arm and cuddle anyway, but sometimes you need him awake
But he's fairly aware of this and insists that you communicate and wake him up if need be. And he will at least try to stay awake. No guarantees (I mean how the fuck does he manage to sleep standing up?), but he'll try
Zayne
Zayne is actually hard for me to peg, despite him being 100% my bias
For Zayne, action trumps words. He's a quiet person, but he's actually very demonstrative
He's also very cerebral about it and observant, so he may very well pick up on your need for attention and love before you're even aware of it yourself
He does research and definitely recommends therapy. He's well aware that it can be difficult to fulfill your needs because, well, overtime
He's a workaholic and that habit is hard to break, especially with his own issues and his care for his patients
That being said, when you're in the same place, expect a lot of affection
Whether it's holding hands, or a hand around your waist, or little things like taking care of your physical well being. He has this knack for making you feel seen and safe and cared for without verbally expressing his emotions
He also makes sure you know that if you need to call, you can. If he's free he'll never ignore you and get back to you as soon as possible
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thoughtsonkm · 23 days
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Bye Jeju, you've been good..
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Eyes always on the prize Jungkookssii mm
The trio was really wholesome in some moments but I'm so ready for Jikook's cozy winter times. It's literally their default setting.
This type of lighthearted mood and way of talking about the topic brings me peace for them. They looked relieved and confident in their choice to stay together. I don't know if they actually knew since September about the lottery verdict or they were just manifesting real hard ahead of time because in their mind there's no way they're separating (like no we don't accept any other answer than being together) but either way what matters is the result and their content feeling.
The way Tae was on the phone the whole time like 'yeah I've heard your enlistment talk 348392 times already' 😂 There really is a sort of "danger" to them having only one extra person on the table cause they get too engulfed in each other. They need a big group when they go out or else 1-2 ppl will feel kinda alienated lol
Jimin in this dark flannel fit got the whole fandom in shambles and rightfully so.
~
Gotta say every time Jimin entertains Jungkook going on and on about topics he knows/has info about, my fondness for them reaches a whole new peak 🥹
~
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I get they were trying to display their strength with their typical pool shenanigans but Jungkook?? You need to chill man there's plenty of other ways to "help a man from drowning" 😂(could this type of insane underwater hair grab be considered bf privileges? lol)
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This towel scene is so 'boys' coded but also a little frisky you feel me? It just has that vibe you know..
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This episode's cuddle was kinda my favourite so far tbh (the CT one is in its own hall of fame given how it was more of a hungry feast than a cuddle). Idk why it just felt very soft, squishy and needy.
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NOW THIS is a confirmation about the perilla leaf debacle. Kook was so careful about it I was dying laughing. It can be a risky choice HAHAHAHAHA
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mimi 🤝🏻 cats kook 🤝🏻 dogs
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WALK THROUGH FIRE FOR YOU, BABY I ADORE YOU 🎶
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This scene was the funniest of the episode. The theatrics, the dramatics, the "asking for more sausage while Jimin was leaving". PEAK
The way he was worried about his taste buds lol. Food really is his #2 priority damn. (#1 being Jimin)
Btw this scene doesn't prove anything but the fact that their hyung-dongseang dynamic is almost ✨nonexistent✨.
~
I noticed they always look at the crew in front of them after smth happens or a joke or whatever. Instead they should look at the camera and break the fourth wall, it would be so funny.
~
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He's been thinking about it since NYC your honor..
~
Out of topic but during 3 days in Jeju we could see them from time to time with a mic in their hands, especially Jimin, but they never showed any karaoke scenes. ROBBED
~
The suspense about Sapporo is not good for my liking. Like they don't need to make Japan more mystical than it is already, we know it's gonna be the softest thing ever.
Why so hush hush huh? I expect an announcement video by Sunday! (max. monday!)
Anyways..Sapporooo here we cooomeee
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batsplat · 1 month
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the reaction to pecco/casey comparison post made by motogp acc on insta is kinda funny bc so many ppl are like “how dare you compare pecco to casey when pecco has the best bike on the grid and casey rode that garbage ducati” . but what about casey’s 2007 title run guys and how in some ppl’s eyes it wasn’t that legit or something bc of the bike advantage. like obviously comparisons between eras are often pretty pointless and devolve into pointless arguments and circle jerking for your fave guy but…..
lol oh man. here is the post for context
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world's most boring discourse generator. the most predictable replies imaginable. did you know that. casey stoner. was very good... and had a bike that was tough to ride? did you know that. did you know the aliens were all very talented? did you know that casey's stats are very impressive? wow. you're telling me now for the first time
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when I first saw the tweet, I did immediately go. *sigh* why are you setting pecco up like this. it's obviously interaction bait and, well, it does work every time. the phrasing "has equalled or outscored most of" casey's achievements at ducati is a bit unnecessary but like... god. who cares!! the only place stats like this belong is in spreadsheets proper hardworking fans made themselves to compare random shit for their personal amusement. bring back real fandom
and yeah, listen, I don't even really have the energy to engage with the merits of comparing the two sets of stats... it was a different time. you can say that casey had on average a less dominant bike than pecco did, which would be true - and he only had the clear outright fastest bike in one of his ducati seasons. you can say the level of competition was higher or lower back then, depending on whatever agenda you're pursuing. you can make arguments about when it was easier to rack up wins, given only around six bikes back then were even capable of winning races - something which is only kinda becoming true again now with the superiority of the gp24. you can point to the ducati back then being a considerably harder bike to ride. you can point to pecco's more impressive internal competition, you can point to casey's era having some undeniably pretty decent riders in the mix. you can do all of that. and it's a complete and utter waste of time. the main point of it is to have another bout of wanking about how much worse today's riders are, which, I cannot stress this enough, who cares!! literally. why does it matter. quality of viewing experience isn't directly linked to some imaginary talent-o'-metre, that's just not how sport works. everyone knows casey is one of the biggest talents this sport has ever seen! it is perhaps the single least controversial take in the whole sport. nobody's erasing casey's achievements. thank you to the random instagram user for securing casey stoner's legacy by bashing pecco. we've solved the crisis, guys, wrap it up
anyway, look. pecco's a two time premier class champion. nobody will die if he's mentioned in the same name as casey. people used to try and discredit casey's achievements... eventually the consensus morphed to acknowledge that he was obviously extremely good. once pecco's retired, the same thing will presumably happen to him. nostalgia comes for us all
#all sports interaction bait is. bad.#*hugs knees and rocks back and forth* idc who the goat is idc idc idc idc you will never make me care who the goat is shut upppppp#it is kinda cute how similar their numbers are mind u#who cares which one of them is better. let's discuss to what extent their neuroses match up#'he was an amazing rider whether you agree or not' - valentino rossi in 2013#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#i just never really get the 'well back in the day the level was higher' stuff because... real talk. does it matter#it'd be a problem if you currently had one guy who was just on a different planet to everyone else. but you don't#also the two best eras for racing this century happened when that was the case so honestly even that bit might be negotiable#but as long as it's competitive... like. who cares...? who gives a shit about how objectively 'talented' these guys are#and you can say the racing isn't great. which yes. agreed!! but mate do I have news for you about 2007#admittedly the highs racing-wise were higher in 2007 but the lows were. well#the amount of revisionism you see with this stuff is crazy like the way people talk you'd think the gp7 was a donkey#god if the aliens hadn't averaged a crazy feud rate i'd hate them so much. worst type of sports fandom is wanking to the ueber talented#casey may be my number one girl but i might be the only person on the planet who is a fan of him in the objectively correct way idk#also not to be mean but a lot of the most annoying people defo haven't actually watched many of casey's races lol#current tag#heretic tag
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suzukiblu · 10 months
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excerpt from the one where Tim Drake goes to an alternate reality and decides to get his other self laid via the local Kon's bisexual awakening:
"Hey, remember when you saved my life earlier?" Tim asks. 
"Yeah, kinda," Kon replies in amusement. "Seeing as it was about two point five seconds after you rigged the evil alien robot army to self-destruct and helped save our entire literal reality's life, so I was definitely paying attention." 
"Flatterer," Tim says with a smirk even as he waves him off. The self-destruct function wasn't even that hard to hack, comparatively. That time he'd downloaded Lex Luthor's active IP files from his personal office while the asshole had been on his damn computer–now that'd been tricky. Interdimensional alien invaders barely compare. And the Brainiac incident still gives him stress migraines when he thinks about it for too long. 
Metropolis sucks and Tim frankly has no idea how his own Kon can stand the place.
But like, getting off-topic here. 
"Well, I was gonna say you should let me pay you back for that," he continues. "But since you bring it up I'll also accept a show of gratitude on behalf of your reality, whichever gets you off harder.” 
Kon laughs, because he is apparently adorable enough to have assumed that was a joke. Precious little moron, Tim thinks fondly. 
"You know, you're a lot less uptight than our version of you is," Kon says, grinning down at Tim before flashing Tim's other self a smirk. "No offense, Rob. Dude's clearly just doing more yoga than you or something. Maybe drinking more tea? Taking the occasional bubble bath?" 
"Silly me, if only I'd invested in more bath bombs in my life," Tim's other self says dryly. 
"It's probably my sex life, actually," Tim himself puts in with an easy shrug. Turns out when you stop pretending you don't have a ridiculously high libido and actually just indulge the thing, a lot of life's little annoyances become a lot easier to handle. Go figure. "Plus my boyfriend Bernard is really great, just his entire existence does wonders for my mood in general and he also makes me eat real food on occasion and monitors my caffeine intake much more reliably than I'm capable of doing on my own. The man is a living antidepressant and I don't even mean that in a fucked-up way, he's just that good." 
"Boyfriend?" Kon blinks at him, then puts on another grin. It takes, Tim cannot help but notice, exactly two beats longer than his real grin would've. "Ohhhhh, okay, so the problem is just that you're not getting laid hard enough?" 
"It is not," Tim's other self says dubiously, watching Kon just a little bit warily and obviously worried about his potential reaction to the word "boyfriend". Well, Tim never claimed to be emotionally intelligent about Kon, so no surprise his other self is also a dumbass there. 
"It kinda is, actually," he tells his other self. "I was tracking my cortisol levels the last time I went on a solo away mission and let's just say they were . . . concerning? Like really concerning. Like by the time I got back I was kiiiiind of convinced I was going to need to go on anti-anxiety meds again. But then I jumped my Kon in the Titans Tower med bay instead and that pretty much solved the problem." 
Kon . . . pauses, sort of. Tilts his head. Tim's other self looks a lot warier.
"'Jumped'," Kon repeats carefully. "Like . . . what, you dragged him to the gym to spar or something?" 
"Like I blew his back out so hard that when he came his TTK fritzed out and disassembled my recovery bed," Tim clarifies helpfully. "It really helped with the cortisol levels issue." 
Kon blinks. Tim's other self looks pained, but also desperately envious. Tim would also be desperately envious if their situations were reversed and so does not blame him for said envy in the slightest. 
"I thought you said you had a boyfriend?" Kon says after a moment, sounding a little odd in a very telling way. Or at least very telling to Tim, anyway. 
As is the way that he's not looking at Tim's other self at all anymore. 
"Open relationship," Tim says. "Also Bernard thinks you're stupidly hot and really likes hearing about the kind of stuff you let me do to you. I've actually been debating inviting you over for his birthday so he can watch us live for once but I haven't asked you yet." 
"What, so your Kon is the side chick?" Kon jokes, awkwardly putting on another just barely belated grin. 
"More like my kept boy, functionally speaking, but he's having a 'weird about commitment' phase right now so I've just been making a lot of sugar baby jokes to soften him up," Tim replies with a shrug. It's only sort of been working, but it has been working, and he's willing to take his time on it. It's not fair to expect Kon to only be easy, after all. "Long-term goal is to marry Bernard and ideally get Kon to 'live-in boyfriend' status somewhere in there, but that would also require him not being weird about commitment and also figuring out how well he and Bernard get along in the same space, so we'll just have to see how that one goes." 
"Uh," Kon says. "Why?" 
"Because you are incredibly important to me and also look like a very horny Renaissance sculptor made you out of calacatta marble," Tim tells him matter-of-factly, gesturing meaningfully at him. "Frankly it's criminal that you ever put clothes on."
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inbarfink · 8 months
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I mean, the thing is that fiction about aliens is almost always going to be about some sort of Other on some level. Whatever it’s about demonizing or fear-mongering about some sort of Outsider Group or trying to get the audience to sympathize with the Other via the metaphor of a lovable alien. 
And Invader Zim is kind of an interesting spot there because, like, it’s not just ‘Bad Outsider Out to Destroy Our Beloved In-Group’ or ‘Poor Sympathetic Outsider Being Put-Down by the In-Group’. First thing first because Zim is kinda both. He is both the Outsider secretly hiding inside the in-group plotting their destruction - but the narrative and framing also sympathizes with him and supports his view of the in-group (that humans are stupid and gross).
So he can’t really be A Scary Demonized Outsider when he gets so much narrative sympathy and support, but also… he is a murderous little world-conquering bastard and most of his suffering is generally just him gets exactly what he deserves so he can’t be your classic sort of Sympathetic Outsider either. 
And the other thing is that the in-group is not even really involved in Zim’s conflict. Zim’s biggest challenge in conquering the earth is Dib, another Outsider. Often, despite being a human and thus part of the literal in-group, Dib is an even bigger Outsider to humanity than Zim is.
Zim and Dib are both Outsiders, and Zim isn’t just an Outsider as an Alien on Earth - among his own people he is in the same situation as Dib is, an Outsider in his own in-group. (Not that he can ever admit to himself that is the case). So these two Weirdos are fighting to protect/further the goals of two in-groups that will never actually accept them. 
And so often their main weapon against each other and the primary danger and the source of their suffering for themselves is the same thing; the in-group conformity and enforcement of social norms. 
Dib’s main evidence that Zim is an Alien is, most of the time, just the fact that he looks and acts weird. But also he himself is constantly bullied for looking and acting weird.
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And Zim’s most constant source of anxiety while undercover on Earth is the fact that he’s going to get caught being Too Weird and then not just fail his mission, but get brutally dissected and experimented on. But his best defense against being exposed is… basically just to point out just how much Dib also Diverges From the Norm.
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It’s the story of two Weirdos trying to get the other punished for being weird in some way, while the Normies just kinda look on and laugh at them both. And the actual thing they want, recognition and acceptance from their in-group is the one thing they are doomed to never actually get. 
And honestly, I think that's actually what makes a lot of real-life Outsiders cling to IZ, especially while we’re teens. I think, in a way, the fact that it’s kind of a messy Outsider narrative makes it more relatable to the messy middle-school/high-school experience than something more neatly crafted to be uplifting to the Weird Kids.
I mean, I certainly see the obvious value in fiction that’s actually trying to create a positive narrative for queer teens or autistic kids or maybe just scene kids or any combination of the following. This sort of media is very good, and can be just as important to some folks.
But... also the truth is that when you’re an edgy teen wrecked with self-loathing for Weirdness you don’t even fully understand “There’s nothing wrong with me and all the people making me feel like they are Bad!” can be a hard message to really believe in. Sometimes it’s easier to start from “Maybe I am all the terrible things people say that I am but.. still deserve love and sympathy, I can still be the hero of the story”. 
And because, sadly, the problem of Weirdos attacking each other for being Weirdos using the same rhetoric that’s used to hurt them, just for the sake of approval and recognition from in-groups that are never going to treat either of them as nothing but a joke - is not a phenomenon exclusive to the Silly Alien Invader Nicktoon.
And Dib and Zim’s rivalry is a great basic framework to explore it both in analysis of the canon and in fanworks.
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somerandomdudelmao · 1 year
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ok wait hold up can we actually just like talk for a second about Donnie's behavior in these last few pages??
Before he found out about the infection, Donnie was still very nonchalant about a lot of situations, but he always had a sense of care and compassion for certain things, like for example, his family and friends. He used a lot of sarcasm and was overall just the snarky autistic tech dude who had more love than he could even imagine giving. He had a relentless grip on his bad-boy image, was stubborn as all hell, but was a well-rounded, lovely guy!
And then the realization hit that he was going to die sooner than expected. Then...
Poof!
Now he's just a shell (Hahaahahahahaha) of who he used to be. Now all he has for himself is a bunch of self-deprecating jokes, responsibilities to pass on to others, and a lack of hope that is just so incredibly unlike him. He still has the sarcasm, sure, but this time it's a lot more dry and emotionless. There's no brevity or lightheartedness to his words anymore, it's all just a monotone mess of half-assed goodbyes and thrown out dreams for the future. Any method of survival has seemingly been lost to time for Donnie, so now he's just kinda... Accepting the fact he's gonna die soon, which only leaves him with his own decaying body and a voice he doesn't even want anymore. And judging by the way he just ignores or shrugs aside everyone's concern, it's all basically just him saying, "Welp, guess I'll die. Here's my shit, no will required."
Also another thing I noticed is that Donnie is basically not allowed to really do anything anymore because he's at risk of dying sooner than he already thinks he will. If he gets more rest and works less, his death come significantly slower.
Meaning he must feel incredibly useless right now.
I think I've also pinpointed the time when this all started happening to Donnie btw. It's a very small moment and I don't have the screenshot on me rn but I think it was in the robo-Raph comic, specifically the moment when Donnie was zooming over to Casey and went "Past" that Kraang alien dude on the way. I imagine he didn't really go past and instead went through, because u know, he's Donatello. If given the chance to commit murder, he will commit, and he very much had the chance right there. I think he went through that Kraang alien, (Very plausible given how fast he was going like jesus- ) got its blood inside a cut or something, and it infected him via his veins or something. Kind of a stretch to assume this since it literally could've been something that took place before the time of this comic series, but this was the earliest instance of foreshadowing/possible infection that I can think of.
I also want to apologize for making all those jokes about like taking you to court and throwing you in jail and stuff because maybe they came off as mean or rude at some points. And for constantly flooding your inbox lol-
Thanks for existing and for making this comic, and congrats on beating the deadline at work! I think you deserve a cookie for that! *Gives a million more cookies* oh yeah and those are for you being you
Oh my fuckiNG GoD...
I don't even know what to say to that
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I guess I just want everyone else to be able to read it too because..oh shit...oh wow.
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blue-sadie · 1 year
Text
Yandere Hope
Spider, Neteyam, Miles, Jake, Tonowari x Na'vi Reader
Prt 1. Prt 2.
Them being yandere for you
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Spider Socorro
His a jealous yandere your a na'vi and his a human people say it could never work but he'll make it, he gets irritated when other males try to court you even infront of him.
It all started when you became friends with him and the sullys you were one of the very few that treated him like a actually person and not some alien.
It took him a while of planning but when he does kidnap you he kinda starves you out so when he does finally feed you, you see that you need him to survive, he keeps you in a cage in a hidden cave far from the village so no one can ever find you.
If you escaped he'll become more desperate and manipulative he'll use the excuse of keeping you to himself because your the only one ever nice to him and guilt you into coming back to him.
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Neteyam
He's a possessive yandere, he fought to get where he is today he doesn't want to be seen like he gets handed everything because of who his dad is and he'll do anything to get you.
When he arrived at your village with his family you where the only to smile at him and not talk bad about him and his family, you also joined in on teaching them your ways.
He brings you back to his homeland because he knows of places he can keep you and he knows you don't know anything about the forest so he hopes the fear will keep you trapped.
When you do escape and he catches you he will take drastic measures and actually break your legs for punishment and when your sobbing he'll just pat your head while saying I fought for you now your mine.
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Miles Quaritch
He's a serious yandere he takes no jokes what so ever he doesn't like anyone other then him talking to you or even looking in your direction he'll take it as a threat and kill them on sight.
You were spiders adoptive mother and so you probably met when he held the sullys kids and spider hostage and he saw how spider responds to you so that also fuels his desire for you.
He probably also caught you after you followed spider down after he fell and decided you would be an excellent prisoner.
If you ever escape he'll use spider as bait and yes spider wouldn't mind it either and when you come back he'll put an electric collar on you.
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Jake Sully
Isolating yandere he'll do anything to make sure he's the only one around you, friends oh they just heard one really bad rumor about you he'll stop at nothing.
You were neytiris best friend and kinda hung out in the background of their lessons making sure he doesn't try anything on her but as he became more na'vi you opened up to him.
He got a small base made so he can keep you there he'll make sure there's limited resources for you and when you run out he'll make you beg for more.
If you escape all hell will break loose he'll threaten you by saying he'll give out important info to the sky people and when they destroy most of your home he'll tell the people you were the one to give that info out.
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Tonowari
He's a condescending yandere he'll make you feel low of yourself when you hang around other people and become a bit distant if you still carry on and make you beg for his forgiveness.
You are jakes sister and came with them to the village because quaritch was after you too, tonowari took it upon himself to teach you their ways.
He makes a hut further in the islands that no one knows about and keep you there but he'll still give you everything you need as long as you behave.
If you escape he'll turn into a mean yandere because why would you leave him how could you think you can live without him.
Tag.List
@sweetirilly
@greekgods15
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