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kaypeace21 · 4 years ago

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Some of your favorite characters are Will’s split personalities (psych/narrative analysis)

This is part 2 of my DID analysis. Part 1 focusing on how the supernatural events of the series correlate to Will’s past with Lonnie. Before, I explain who I believe are alters of Will’s (previously called ‘split personalities’). I think I need to explain a crash course on what Dissociative Identity disorder (DID: previously ‘multiple personality disorder’) entails. And the supernatural manifestation within the show as well- Before explaining which characters I believe are alters of Will’s and why. So let’s begin.

There are 4 hallmarks of a potential dissociative disorder

“Dissociation is when instead of staying present in the face of stress you exit your thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations and zone out. . It’s as if your body is a computer that reaches overload for input then just shuts down.’ It’s considered a defense mechanism in psychoanalytic theory.”

‘An individual struggling with dissociation or a dissociative disorder may only experience one of the following or may experience multiple. Each individual’s experience with dissociation can be varied. Symptoms can last just a matter of moments or return at times over the years.”

1)“Identity confusion and alteration -When an individual forgets who they are or takes on a new personality unlike themselves.” (Aka his possession).

2)Dissociative Amnesia-”The forgetting of a major event, such as a childhood trauma or forgetting (traumatic) things happening in real-time.Many survivors of are able to “forget” until sometime later …when memories are triggered by certain events or when the body and mind are no longer able to conceal the memories.” (Aka Will’s ‘now memories’. The reason he refers to them as “now-memories” is because they are things he’s already experienced (as memories) but he’s only now remembering - because of his “dissociative-amnesia’

3)”Derealization-Feeling like the world is not real or is foggy.” (the upsidedown)

4) “Depersonalization-The sense of not being in control of, or not being connected to, one’s body.”

vocab and definitions (about DID) to keep in mind

CORE/HOST- “The core is considered by some to be the person first born to the body. The host is the alter who most commonly uses the body (which may or may not be the core).”

ALTERS - “are dissociated self states that can be highly differentiated from each other. They can have unique names, appearances, ages, gender identities, sexualities, memories (pasts), skills, faiths, political views, abilities, and ways of viewing and interacting with the world. Alters can even perceive themselves as different species, inanimate objects, or as members of a different race, gender, age, or ethnicity/race.No one can choose to have alters or what their alters are like. Alters' creation is entirely unconscious. Most alters have their own sense of identity. A host cannot actually control the alter.An individual with DID has one brain and one body. Dissociative barriers between alters are not literal boundaries, and knowledge, memories, skills, preferences, and traits may bleed through.Alters usually have a role or multiple roles in a smaller system- these roles may or may not appear contradictory.”

SYSTEM-”A system is a collection of alters within one body.Subsystems are two or more groups of alters that might have developed separately, and they may or may not be aware of the other group.”

INNER WORLDS-”it could be a house, to a city, or multiple locations-where alters go when not in control of the body. The innerworld is where alters can interact with one another and where there physical appearance is how they describe .Communication between alters may happen face-to-face (in each other's respective bodies, via the internal world). Expansive internal worlds can result when highly imaginative or dissociative systems use their inner world to retreat from the outside world and so play out entire stories within their mind. Alters may be perceived as having internal lives when not active in the outside world, and these inner lives may involve travel to other internal locations. Many internal happenings may be metaphorical or highly symbolic of the core’s past. Inners worlds may also have characters called "NPCs" (taken from the roleplaying term "non-player characters") that can interact with alters but they are more similar to imaginary constructs rather than actual alters (they can’t control the body and some are made consciously unlike alters-although that’s not always the case). These npcs can be background characters to make the world more real, and it’s not uncommon for parents, family members, or friends of alters to be NPCs.They can feel just as real as natural-born people . Different subsystems may reside in different locations in an internal world or may have non-overlapping internal worlds.”

INTEGRATION- This is essentially the closest thing an alter can do to die- but frankly I consider that comparison harsh. It’s “ when an alter permanently combines with the host or another alter.Fusion occurs when identities merge together and become a unified whole (retaining the memories and some traits of both merging identities.) Integration into a single, individualized identity IS the goal for some in therapy. But it is not, and does not have to be, for everyone. It is possible to achieve full healing by processing memories, establishing communication across the whole mind, lowering dissociative barriers, and showing aptitude in everyone working toward a common goal - all without actually integrating. Others may choose to integrate SOME parts, or "downsize", but still leave a small system to go about their life.”

“They may retain any number of independently acting alters. Reasons for choosing not to fully integrate can include: feeling that full integration is unnecessary; not understanding what integration actually entails and being afraid of "losing" their alters; uncertainty over how to navigate the world as one integrated person; being used to having alters around for company, entertainment, or support; alters having their own unique relationships that they're hesitant to lose; alters wanting to remain separate for their own sakes.”

SWITCHING-”Switching refers to one alter taking control of the body at the expense of another alter who was previously in control of body or ‘fronting’. Switches can be consensual, forced, or triggered.Switches can be slow, quick, or uncontrollably rapid. Switching can take seconds, minutes, or even days to occur.Stress (Will’s anniversary effect) or even a reminder of a trauma, can trigger a switch of alters. * I’ll talk more about this later

ALTERS DYING-“Even if mock deaths or temporary experiences of alters “dying” from old age (or other means) have been acted out in some systems, they aren’t actually dying. You cannot kill off a collective part of the conscious mind like you can a person. Their thoughts, memories, emotions will all still be there, so they must be as well. The part may have gone into extreme hiding/dormant, been momentarily immobilized, or merged with another part of the mind (integration), but they most assuredly did not and can not disappear entirely or “be killed”.

Next we’re on to the supernatural concept they chose to use for this disorder.

We see in the first episode. Will mentions x-men 134 which is about the dark phoenix . The show is litered with x men references like Dustin giving cerebro ( a machine belonging to professor x) to Will. Dustin also asks if El was born with powers “like the x-men.” And Mike also says El channels Will and Dustin once again says “like professor x.” Now- does anyone know who professor x’s son (David) and the ‘shadow phoenix”are ? Well his son is considered the most powerful mutant in the world and has Dissociative identity disorder (DID).At one point some of his alters literally escape his head and enter the real world as tangible people. The ‘shadow phoenix’ is also a sibling to the ‘dark phoenix’.And this ‘shadow phoenix’ (a ‘shadow monster’ if you will) terrorized David’s alters and forced them to integrate back into 1 personality .

In ‘scanners’ one psychic mentions how he “opened the door” to the people trapped in his own mind in order for Daryl to be Daryl again. While in ‘altered states’ the man (who saw flashes of another dimension) met his ‘unborn self in the crack in the void.’Similar to how Mr clarke and Alexi describes the portals of other dimensions being opened as a ‘door’. However, these doors were created before El- we see El created the one at the lab, but that doesn’t take into account the ones in the tree or the cave. There’s more portals we’re unaware of that allowed alters and npcs to escape and become part of the real world even before El opened the gate in s1. And unbeknownst to some of the characters and the audience we’ve already seen other ‘inner worlds’ of Will’s -besides the upsidedown . Which people (not part of the system) have interacted with . As Dustin in s1 said about the other dimensions / vale of shadows , it’s “ A dark reflection or echo of our world ...It’s right next to you and you don’t even know it” .

We see both mr clarke stab a pencil into a plate and Alexi a straw into a box to illustrate this. What’s interesting is the one other time we see this motion is when Lonnie says “someone should be held accountable” (referring to what happened to Will), as he hammers into the wall and it transitions to Mike mimicking mr clarke. Implying that Lonnie is responsible and will be held accountable in the future.

-There’s also the fact the ‘dark phoenix’ mentioned in the first episode of St is highly associated with fire- having pyrokinesis (like Will the wise) and who “had able to warp reality on a universal scale” . It’s like how the show talks about physics often, like in s3/1 (plank’s constant or Hugh Everett’s many worlds interpretations) - and Einstein who believed quantum mechanics wasn’t real said “God does not play dice with the universe." So since he was wrong , cause quantum mechanics is real , the quote should be “god plays dice with the universe.” Like Will does in the beginning of the first episode.Will is captured by the demogorgan (in the game) so he was captured in real life because he rolled a 7. I talked more about this more in the mf section.

- It’s similar to one of the Duffers admitted biggest inspirations for the series ‘altered states’. Who’s mental illness alters reality . He hallucinates seeing flashes of another dimension like Will.

We’ll talk about more evidence of this concept in the character breakdowns (mostly in the mf section). So now on to the alters (and Npcs) who escaped Will’s mind into the real world as tangible people.

Tr*gger warning now, because of how DID is caused. “The dissociative aspect is thought to be a coping mechanism - the person literally shut off or dissociated themselves from a situation or experience too traumatic, or painful to assimilate with their conscious self.As many as 99% of individuals who develop dissociative disorders have recognized personal histories of recurring, overpowering, and often life-threatening disturbances or traumas at a sensitive developmental stage of childhood (usually before age 6). It cannot form AFTER the ages of 6-9 years of age, aka 10 and up (though, once you have DID you can develop new alters at any time).DID is rarely diagnosed in children (and is usually diagnosed in adulthood or late teens), despite the average age of appearance of the first alter being 5.9 years old . ”

They’ll be brief mentions of dark subjects in this psych/narrative analysis because of this. I’ll also be listing movies said to inspire s4 of st (according to st writers), or mentioning movies name dropped by the cast, the Duffers , or in the show itself .

ALTERS

Max Mayfield & Billy Hargrove

When Max is first introduced - Mr Clark talks about “brain cells working together as one” (while talking next to a brain). Similarly, dustin/mike mention mr clarke when saying what’s essentialy a did system “A collective consciousness. this is the thing that controls everything. this is the brain.” This concept about Max , is mentioned again when mr. clark discuses phineus Gage saying he had “a total change in personality that even his friends called him no longer gage.” And emphasizes max and Will in this scene- showing one in clear focus, while another is blurry, and as they make eye contact Max turns away .

Both are poor, their bio dads aren’t around, both like horror films, comics and videogames. Both their bio dads left them . And both use bats in anger when emulating their abusers ,and both are heavily associated with rainbows. On Halloween she dresses up as a character who as a child dressed up as a clown on Halloween (Will’s fear/ what triggered him on Halloween) and whose surname is Myers (Byers?)

Billy, like Will , have nicknames for their real name- ‘william’. Both have abusive dads who called them homophobic slurs, and forced them to play baseball to man-up. Billy’s old baseball team is even tigers (the mascot of Will’s elementary school and matching Will’s tiger painting in his room in s1-2).The “it was a 7 “ vs “the wave was 7 feet”. Both hit with needles, into rock music , attracted to Wheelers ,and were the main subjects possessed by the mf. At one point the dark phoenix fails to merge with jean so goes to merge with her clone body as the next best thing. In this case the mf went to Will’s second alter William/Billy. And as Will states ��another me.” And both say about the mf “I’m sorry, he made me do it.”

Neil and Lonnie both push Jon and Billy against a wall. And Jon tells of a time where his dad made him kill a rabbit . And Billy’s last name “Hargrove” means - “grove filled with rabbits" . While, ‘Mad-max’ her nickname is based on the male 80s film character ‘mad max’ a man being terrorized by a r**ist biker gang who attacks both men/women. It’s also possible that Billy’s appearance was based on Will seeing mrs wheeler’s romance novels?

In the film “don’t breathe’- the reason why the siblings are from California is alluded to in a flashback of Jon & Will. The older sibling (with abusive parents) takes care of the younger sibling like a parent and the little sibling says she wants to be a surfer despite living in a land locked state (without an ocean, like Indianna). Older sibling says one day maybe they can live in California together . And the Older sibling tells a friend about how their dad left them, and how they were thrown in a dark trunk by an abusive parent as kid . Which was alluded to in s1, when Jon checked the trunk to see if Lonnie put Will in there.And we see the mf (who is emulating Lonnie) doing the same thing to heather, and tom (hitting or strangling them and then throwing them in the trunk).

Certain scenes, are alters re-enacting past scenes of trauma. “The family dynamics will be played out in a variety of ways but will most obviously be noted in the way the survivor splits off their system.Some survivors will internalize their family into their own DID system. Some alters may reenact trauma and ab*se, sometimes reinforcing ab*sers’ lessons to prevent further ab*se but sometimes serving as a permanent component of an internal flashback.“The reason, Billy acts/is racist is because he’s emulating Neil (but more accurately Lonnie) who told Will not be friends with lucas and thus recreates that moment with Max .lonnie in the s4 films is very racist. Another example, is Will has shown a fear of doors opening (in s1-2) shown by how the demogorgan unlocks the door telepathically (like El does often).And the mf opening doors by themselves in the house and arcade. Neil demands Billy opens his door. And right after Max stares at Will-Billy yells to open the door and tells Max “I’ll cut you b*tch” if she doesn’t open the door. This is because Lonnie said and did similar things to Will if he didn’t open the door.

What connects all 3 is that they all have an absent parent and have baseball associated with them mimicking a familial ab*ser. Even the mf is associated with the sport.

Alexi

Some “ alters can even speak a different language than the host. Despite, the host personality not knowing a single word of the language.’

Similar to Will who won the science fair for 4 years in a row- Alexi is a scientist who has a child like disposition . Will has a fear of clowns (a clown even triggered him on Halloween), and we see that after he’s attacked by a lonnie-look alike he dies surrounded by clowns.

He also sees a friend strangled by the lonnie-look alike (using 1 hand) and die. throughout the season the mf who emulates lonnie strangle people the exact same way, with one hand (doing this to joyce, el, heather, and jon). probably cause Will either saw Lonnie strangle someone or was strangled in this way. There’s also the fact when we first see Alexi - lights flicker like in s1 (illustrating a supernatural element associated with Will and others).

And stangertheory pointed this one detail out, when watching woody the woodpecker he says “can we watch loonie toons, now?” murray: ‘no’/ “can we play d&d , now? crew:no.

Also, “woody in the cartoon is terrorized by Andy and PAPA panda. To Woody's surprise, Andy's attempts prevail, and Woody is taken away to the psychiatric hospital— but not before his captors prove to be crazier than he is” (cough s4 spoiler, but that’s a post for another day).We also have a scene where murray compares him to a child bringing shit in and tries touching his junk with a metal detector. And when Alexi says to stop, Murray says he’ll do as he pleases in his house. Probably a re-enactment . And Murray mistranslates what he says occasionally as being “n*ked or exposed”, “penetrating a hole”. Also ‘alexi’ may also be a reference to Alexy in russian folklore. A clever-minded priest's son (Lonnie is alluded to be a religious zealot in s4 movies) who wins by tricking and outsmarting his foes and defeating a dragon by trickery. This is another connection to Will who is heavily associated with dragons- for a huge spoiler related reason - let’s just say mf’s can create dragons, Will drew a dragon, has a dragon poster, read a dragon comic in a s1 flashback , was there for the dragon video game, and Dustin mentions a dragon in s3 because of foreshadowing.

**The mindflayer (previously known as ‘Will the wise’) -persecutor alter

“A child that is heavily into fantasy might have alters who present as certain fantasy creatures that the child sees as being capable of protecting them from being hurt again.All of the personalities begin as friends and allies…” We see this with Will’s first alter- Will the wise. Who Will described as having fire powers to attack smart bad guys. And who is based off the rules of d&d.

“ Persecutors are alters who purposefully harm the body, system, host, core, or other alters. Most of the literature on the development of these persecutory alters reports that they usually begin life as protectors and then, for some reason, turn on the host, becoming persecutory. Kluft, in 1985, describes the persecutors as initially "taking all the suffering for the others (alters & host). Persecutory personalities originate from the shame and anger related to the traumatic experience and to the perpetrator. “

‘It is usually during the transition between childhood to adolescence when childhood protectors becomes a persecutor.” And begin mimicking the ab*ser. We actually may have seen this transition at the end of s1- where WW became the mf. In d&d lore, mindflayers are created by inserting a tadpole into a human- like what we saw at the end of s1 where Will coughed up the slug from the upsidedown. Meaning all that supernatural stuff we saw Will do in s1 was actually Will the wise (ww) before he turned into the mf. While the flashbacks in s1 (and singing in castle byers) were of the Will we saw in s2-3.

Will says WW is a wizard ( writing on a music tape in s3 “will the wise-wizard mix’ and having his password for castle byers be ‘rhadaghast’- a lotr wizard.)The way they describe d&d Wizards matches Will/mf perfectly “Wizards are adepts and magicians . wizards are able to create spells of explosive fire, sparking lightning, subtle deception, and gross mind control. Their magic summons monsters from other planes of existence, predicts the future, and turns defeated enemies into zombies. Their most powerful spells can transform one substance into another, summon meteors from the sky, and open portals to other worlds”.

Nancy even accidentally calls the mf the “mind -flamer” (aka fire powers of ww ). Dustin says the mf “takes over minds using their highly developed psionic powers” (like wizards).We see Will the wise described as having fire/lightning powers and in the first ep we see him leave Mike’s house causing the lights to flicker, turn on his bike light with his mind (before being attacked by the demogorgan), blink once for yes and twice for no to communicate with Joyce, cause lightning to spark out of the phones twice, and be proficient in guns like Lonnie. We know the mindflayer is also associated with lightning/storms (but that’s only because it’s one of Ww’s abilities). When Hopper sees Joyce’s phone he even says “storm bq-ed this pretty good.“ And in s2 a scientist said the same phrase while in the upside down looking at the burned equipment the mf created. Showing a correlation between Ww and the mindflayer. CAUSE THEY’RE THE SAME PERSON. In the comic we see electricity come out of Ww’s hands. And in s1 he drew his wizard character with lightning (BEFORE) he went to the upside down. And in s2 WW was drawn with flames on his cloak.

Will in his cannon journal even draws the mind flayer with red lightning, and later uses red paper to sketch clouds/lightning and pastes a picture of himself on to it. Because deep in his subconscious (along with the memories of his father- he realizes he created the mf/ww). And Joyce even describes the tunnels he draws as “like lightning.” And note in s1 we are told Lonnie taught Will baseball (and this was when Jon told Will not to mimic him)- and suspiciously there is a baseball and baseball-mitt next to the ‘shadow monster’ (mf) drawing and a bat (next to the ww drawing in castle byers). Cause mf= ww. Will lies and says the mf is just a sketch for a story he’s writing- but even if that’s not exactly true. The mf is still something he unconsciously created.And of course Will is called ‘zombie boy’ and in s3 when Will watches a zombie movie and writes a d&d story about juju zombies- the mf creates zombies and creates a monster resembling the thing (because when Will was writing his d&d story he was next to the ‘the thing’ poster in s3. In s2 Will playing dig dug which is about underground mazes- so the supernatural underground caves are made. And it’s a callback to the s1 d&d game with “troglodytes “ (cave men). And in s3 the Russians had the underground lab too - sort of being the troglodytes in a way.And similar to s1, after Will watches poltergeist Will/ww is thrust into the same scenario as the little girl (being trapped in another dimension- where the mothers can only hear their voices and communicate to them through electronics ). Like how rolling the 7 in d&d caused him to be captured by the demogorgan in the game and real life. Nancy saying: “So this thing is like a brain that’s controlling everything.”Hopper then says “So how do we kill this thing shoot it with fireballs?”And Dustin says “ No, No, fireballs you summon an undead army.”But Mike actually nails it on the head when he says, “If the brain dies the body dies … closing the gate will kill him(referring to Will).Because it’s not the mindflayers’ brain - it’s Will’s brain- that both Will and the mf share!

In the episode after the mindflayer enters Will - the episode is literally titled “ Will the wise”. Here we see a ‘slow switch’ occur.”Slow switches are when two or more alters (Will and mf) are co-conscious to varying degrees and slowly blending and retreating to allow one alter (mf) to gain prominence .Some indicators that a switch may be about to occur include feeling "spacey.”

In this episode we don’t see A full switch but ‘blending’. “ A full switch is rarely necessary. Instead of an alter switching to front, they can exert passive influence on the alter currently at front (Will) . Passive influence can be described as intrusions from alters that are not currently prominent in the mind or using the body. This may manifest as ego-alien thoughts, knowledge, memories, feelings, emotions, opinions, preferences, urges, abilities, or actions. These intrusions may vary in strength and influence and may result in the fronting alter taking actions or voicing opinions that they can't explain or account for.”

We see this with Will’s ‘now memories’ the reason he refers to them as “now-memories” is because they are things he’s already experienced (as memories) but he’s only now remembering them- because of his “dissociative-amnesia’ . An example is Will fearing the tub, and yelling at his mom -confused at his own reaction. Because ww is the one afraid of the tub not Will.This is because this is one of the locations abuse often takes place. There’s at least 20 movies where a bad guy tries drowning someone in a tub. In splice, the cell, and the ring all incorporate an ab*sive father trying to drown his young child. In the cell the father would beat his son, burn him, called him homophobic slurs, and almost drowned him and causing a seizure.When Will tries to take a bath it’s overplayed with Mr Clarke saying (in front of a model of a human brain) - “Organisms instinctively respond to danger, expose a bacterium to a toxic chemical and it will flee or deploy some other defense mechanism. We’re very much the same.” As a flash of Will’s “now-memories” occur as he stares at the tub. And we see a zoom in shot of the back of his head (which Will said is associated with memories) . And Mike stares at Will’s empty desk.Meaning, Will’s starting to fear the bath as he’s starting to remember (subconsciously) what previously occurred there because of WW- Lonnie/tubs being the ‘toxic chemical’ in the analogy.

WW fully takes control/switches in the following episode ‘Dig dug’ when he wakes up from the nightmare of Hopper being attacked in the cave- this is indicated by zooming in on the drawing of ‘Will the wise’ before he wakes up. And explains his odd behavior- of being oddly quiet . Looking up surprised at all the cave/vine drawings on the walls. It’s common for alters to pretend to be the host when they switch. He displays being able see into the future (like Will describes WW him being able to do in s3- like when ww in s2 says Hopper will die), and he late tracks Hopper’s location by closing his eyes like the drawing of ww. Mike mentioning he’s a ‘superspy’ right after he finds Hopper- the next episode is even called “the spy” as Mike realizes he’s the mf and says he’s “the spy”. He initially tried to help until the soldiers burned him (causing a seizure like Lonnie previously caused) and later when they burn him again. He decides to kill them- similar to how El killed 2 men for putting her in solitary confinement multiple times.

However, I need to point out “ protectors are still and always protectors. What changes is the protective behaviors no longer look obviously protective and in actuality may be harmful and life threatening to the host.” He still acts as a protector saying he got upset when they hurt him/Will. And participating in a supernatural-extreme version of ‘thought snatching’.”thought snatching" (taking away your thoughts) can be caused by the actions of alters.” So he incorrectly tries wiping all of Will’s thoughts/memories to shield the body from past trauma.

Mf is also hinted to be under the category of a ‘ demon alter’- Will being handed the “devil’s baby” firework and in the background is a sticker of a demo(n)-dog . “Demon alters are often a form of protector known as a persecutor.Some people have alters which are supernatural beings. These are regarded as possession-form identities, if a person is consciously aware of the actions of the alter then the person may describe themselves as feeling "possessed" by an outside person, spirit, deity (god), or demon.”

“Attempts to banish them using religious techniques such as "deliverance" or exorcism do not work permanently, can be harmful and may prolong any internal war between alters and preventing healing .”

“Ignoring them, trying to shut them up or restrain them, punishing them, or any of the various attempts at “getting rid of them” will not only never work (their needs will only become greater and louder), they’ll become more and more traumatized as you confirm to them their every belief about the world.

“You can’t actually “get rid of them” anyway, so it’s far better to try and understand them. “

So yeah- our heroes literally did everything wrong to make it worse.And literally mimicked Lonnie who tied him to chairs in his shed (and like Brenner did to joyce/ Russians did to Robin & steve) or to a bed (like brenner to Terry/lonnie to Will) and hurt and burned him (like Lonnie). Also, FYI the person who was calling Joyce at the beginning of s2 and freaked her out, and later called during the excorcism was Lonnie- why WW freaked out over the call.Noah was even told to watch the excorcist for the burning scene at the end of the season. Even the movie implied it was all based on a similar trauma and it was in the girl’s head- she even while possessed had the male voice of the man who was implied to have ab*sed her and said phrases he said in the film. Similar to WW’s deeper non-human voice he used to try and tell them to ‘let him go.’

So in the next season he was worse than ever and wanted revenge on the people who tried to kill him. Because he fears they’ll come after him again and hurt him- similar to Kali who says the people who are still after her ( and burned her with a taser stick/nancy with burning stick) are still after them and will kill them.

We also see the mindflayer despite in the show and d&d lore be sensitive to sunlight pick the summer to come back. Now, why is that? The answer is simple it’s when Will started to realize his romantic feelings for Mike. Joyce at the beginning of the season says “You won’t think it’s gross when you fall in love”?But due to his ab*se - WW DOES! And Will just responds to Joyce , unconvincingly, saying “I’m not going to fall in love.” But he already has!

“Even non-ab*sive romantic relationships may provoke the protector’s vitriolic reaction if the relationship takes on a meaning which feels threatening. Simply feeling the possibility of closeness to another person may be the trigger because of the protector’s prior learning that trust and dependency lead surely and inevitably to ab*se and hurt.”(Mierendorf, 1993). EX: a persecutor alter who identifies herself only as "Me, Myself" was questioned about her anger and violence to the host.

" she began becoming interested in boys, and dates, and all that [she trails off], and I hated it and I didn't want any part of it. So I quit, I wasn't going to do any more ... nobody was ever gonna touch me ...And whenever that would happen with Gretchen [the host] it would hurt me and I would hate it and I'd hate her, and I'd hate her for letting that happen . i wanted to k*ll her”

Whenever the Mf is close and Will touches his neck it relates to his romantic feelings for Mike. 1st time it’s on one of their ‘movie dates’, 2nd time when Will is sad when Mike and El walk off together down the hill to make-out, , 3rd time right after he smashed castle byers after Mike says “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls”, 4th time (after the fight with Mike) when Billy is yelling to open the door (a trigger) and confides in Mike, 5th time when Mike asks him to go away so he can talk to El in the hospital waiting area, and 6th time when Mike says he loves El.

And in s3, Mike says on a rainy day “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls” (and similarly Lonnie called Will a “fag” and a “queer”). Then he leaves Mike’s house, tears-up all his sketches, comics, a pic of mike (things he loves). And uses a bat that Lonnie taught him to use -to destroy castle Byers (which was also built on a rainy day , after his dad left).He uses a bat, despite saying in s1 he doesn’t like baseball. He has a bat in castle byers (next to a WW drawing) and a mitt/ baseball in his room (specifically next to a picture of the mindflayer.) and Will looked at the Will the wise drawing and then destroys castle byers with a bat. Showing WW/mf are the same person and that WW (and even Will to some extent) is still not taking Jon’s advice about not mimicking Lonnie.He uses the bat (lonnie taught him to use) to try to “man-up” and destroy or even taint the things he loves- castle byers & Mike . And after this, he grabs his neck (which in s2 he said he associated with now-memories) and then says “He’s back” (aka Lonnie’s influence/mf). And then everything supernatural begins to escalate.

-“ another ‘threat’ the, the persecutor believes the host may pose in adolescence or adulthood is breaking the silence about the ab*se and/or the multiplicity. We then witness the protector’s desperate attempt to control the client, to “save him” from the expected dire consequences of revealing the secrets.”

“The persecutor frequently protects the host through scare tactics; through fear and intimidation. In order for this scare tactic to work the host must be convinced of the persecutor's capacity and willingness (even desire) to use the utmost in force and destructiveness. The persecutor must, in short, be viewed as Putnam described: "a fearsome, loathsome, deamon-like entity” .When the danger posed comes from outside the system the persecutor uses the same scare tactics, trying to impress the intruder (in this case the therapist, etc) with his or her ferocity and proclivity to violence.The persecutor therefore becomes increasingly loaded with hostility toward the host, to the point where the original protective function can be lost to their consciousness.Finally, it should be obvious that the persecutor who uses threats of violence to protect the host may be quite worried about either the host or others uncovering the underlying protective intent of their actions because it disarms the power of their threat.”

EX:” Susan was a 31 year old woman who came in for treatment when she started recovering memories of inc*st which had begun with f*ndling and proceeded to r*pe just prior to adolescence. Susan reported a host of dissociative symptoms as well as feeling as if she had a "monster inside me who wouldn't allow me to heal.”Before the next session the therapist received a letter from an ego state named Shadow. The letter detailed how big and fierce Shadow was and how she was supposed to be feared, have control, and all the power.In the next session Shadow revealed that she had been using fear to prevent Susan from disclosing the ab*se. Shadow firmly believed that Susan's father would kill them if the abuse were disclosed.”

“As Putnam notes, while the persecutor displays “extreme contempt toward the host,” paradoxically, “the dominant emotion of the persecutor may really be love” (1989, p. 207). In fact, it is this very love which propels the persecutor in the harassment of the host -feeling it is a way to protect them from perceived threats. “

“ They are NOT the actual ab*ser.They are just copying behaviors shown to them by bad people, not harboring the intent, sadism or immorality of the actual perpetrators. We understand this change ( from protector to persecutor) and displaying ab*sive behaviors does not reflect an underlying character structure.Instead we understand the change as demonstrating a past adaptive instrumental use of violence in an attempt to preserve the system in the face of a [perceived] threat.’

**Another words, for anyone confused- WW went from childhood protector to teen persecutor because of perceived threats. Will (the host) becoming aware of his romantic feelings for Mike and Will slowly and subconsciously gaining his memories of past ab*se - and WW fearing once he remembers he’ll tell someone. So he wants to prevent this by scaring Will and others .And does this by playing the role/character of a scary monster- mimicking the scariest things he knows Lonnie and the mf from d&d. It’s also possible like some persecutors he’s forgotten his original protective function or like other persecutors he’s simply masking how he’s trying to protect Will (because if anyone knew he cared for Will the threat wouldn’t be affective anymore).

‘Alters "should be treated with equal kindness," despite their behaviors.Persecutors are often "misguided protectors" which can be negotiated with. With ‘patience, persistence and kindness" they can be allowed to choose a different role once the person is safe from ab*sers. The persecutor can be "turned into a constructive force" (Watkins, 1978, p. 397) and become “one of the therapist’s strongest allies and can play a major role in the healing of the patient” (Putnam, 1991, p. 205) (*I’ll talk more about this in my s4 analysis) .With healing a non-human alter can even turn human again! "I have an alter who was a persecutor for a long time. A lot of people see persecutors as bad and sometimes even the persecutors themselves see themselves as bad. This alter saw herself as an ab*ser and carried an awful lot of self hate, but she wasn't bad really because her motives were to protect us even though she wasn't going about it in a very good way. She thought that if she punished us and scared us into 'keeping in line' then other people wouldn't have to hurt us. Eventually she learnt that hurting us wasn't necessary, so now she is trying to learn how to protect us in more healthy ways."

-Wizard

There’s also important inspirations for the show to mention that support this theory:

Montauk Project’- The original title for Stranger things was “Montauk”- in reference to the Montauk Project. It was about experiments conducted on psychic children, where the scientists would “break” them psychologically to strengthen their powers and to program them. Duncan who could “open portals to other dimensions- let loose a monster from his subconscious.”

‘A wizard of Eathsea’ (which suzie mentions in s3)- Is about a male wizard Ged (Will) who casts a powerful spell, but the spell goes awry and instead he releases a shadow creature! The new Archmage, Gensher, describes the shadow as an ancient evil that wishes to possess Ged. But the ‘shadow’ turns out to be a representation of the darkest aspects of his personality. And the only way for the chaos to stop is for ged and the shadow to merge.

‘the dark crystal’ movie poster in Mike’s room is about a race called urSkeks who inadvertently divided themselves into two separate beings; the violent, materialistic Skeksis, and the gentle, contemplative urRu. It was only when they merged back together as one could harmony and peace be restored to the world.

‘Long kiss goodnight’- both (’good’ and supposedly ‘bad’) personalities also integrate into 1 happy personality.

In d&d “it’s also possible, although rare, for an extremely powerful mind flayer wizard to become a true lich, also known as an illithilich. illithid's last desire upon death was to be rejoined with its elder brain.” ( Will’s mind/ he wants to integrate with Will).

Even the way the mindflayer/ ‘shadow monster’ functions is similar to the ‘shadow phoenix’/how integration in DID works. “They considered feeding on brains as a euphoric experience as it absorbed its victim's memories, personality, and fears.”

The dark phoenix (referenced in s1ep1) fails to merge with jean so goes to merge with her clone body as the next best thing. In this case the mf went to Will’s second alter William/Billy. And as Will states “another me”. Later Jean, Phoenix, and madelyn (clone) merge into 1 person- the new-jean now having the memories and personality traits of all 3.

in s1 Mr clarke describes the vale of shadows (later the upsidedown) as being created by “necrotic” (’dead’-zombie boy) and shadow (shadow monster) magic. In d&d the Vale of Shadows, is as a lush valley hidden in the mountains that holds a sacred pool with the power to make dreams reality. (In this case nightmares representing past ab*se). He even describes his ‘now memories’ as ‘like a dream’.

In ‘never ending story’ referenced in s3 - the land of Fantasia represents humanity’s imagination and is thus without boundaries. However ‘the Nothing’ (the physical manifestation of darkness) which has taken over Fantasia and it’s inhabitants is a manifestation of the ‘loss of hopes and dreams’.

Silent hill videogames/movies (duffers cited as inspo):. “The bad guys faked Alessa’s death. Kaufmann prepared a substitute body of alessa; and performed the fake "autopsy (like Will) .Alessa believed that their current world must be cleansed with fire (WW’s fire powers). Alessa had a very dark, violent, traumatic and ab*sive childhood: r*ped, beaten, tortured, and even burned , all by the age of 7- “it was a 7″). She had supernatural powers and was called a witch. She had precognition (future/intuition) and pyrokinesis (fire) which developed after her ab*sive mother burned her (like ww). It’s also implied Dahlia her mother would lock Alessa in their house's dark attic for long periods of time for any irreligious behavior (the trunk).Alessa was "always" sad, and Alessa only found respite when escaping to other worlds through fantasy to cope with and comfort herself in the face of her harsh reality. At times, Alessa seems to completely withdraw inward, perhaps as a result of years of trauma as there are many instances of her becoming unresponsive when questioned.Because of all of her ab*se Allesa’s soul split in 1/2 (becoming Alessa and Cheryl).Selfless at heart, she cared for her second half /reincarnation more than she cared for herself, wanting to spare them the hellish nightmare she endured at the hands of her ab*sive mother and her cult. For seven years (it was a 7), Alessa endured her suffering because she had not wanted to destroy whatever small happiness her other self was able to enjoy, but little by little, it became more than Alessa could bear. Alessa's latent psychic abilities are triggered and she shrouds Silent Hill in fog and an altered reality to prevent her mother's scheme from advancing. Many of the drastic changes that befall the town in the game, such as the horrific creatures that come to inhabit it, are conjured from her imagination and delusions. “ ( personally i think Lonnie went to the house offscreen in s1 and tried to take Ww- why when lonnie is at the byers house they zoom in on a bullet in the tv for some reason with no explanation on how it occurred). Cheryl and Alessa also later merge again .

mystic river-in the 80s, a young boy who plays baseball is r**ed by 2 men in a cabin in the woods and escapes and runs into the forrest . He imagines perpetrators as werewolves and vampires as a way to cope. And imagines he’s in a scary world that no one else can see (that disappears when he turns around). And he even has a split personality. He wishes he could turn into a undead monster so he doesn’t have to feel the pain of being human anymore.

other DID movies/show inspirations for St (some realistic /some more supernatural so resemble DID) : prince of tides,primal fear (realistic DID ,caused by childhood se*ual trauma).supernatural/ or non realistic DID: elfen lied, exorcist, and Audrey rose .

Now on to the next point- “chronologically, it is the persecutory alter personality who creates the first split. Helper alter personalities constitute the second split, and as such, constitute a defense against the first split. These two successive splits constitute the basic dissociation. Further alter personality formations are only of secondary nature. In order to cope with the first split, the host personality produces companions resembling [him] as a second defense.The alter personalities developing in the second phase originate from the desire of the host personality to regain her previous strength and from her striving to create alter personalities resembling herself who share the same aim with her.”

So to make it simple some alters are more based on Will in order to combat the alters more based on WW/mf (the 1st alter/. protector- persecutor). So let’s talk about other alters based on ww/mf.

Kali Prasad (avenger alter/ different race alter)

“The avenger holds the rage from the childhood abuse and may attempt to avenge themselves or seek retribution from the ab*ser.”

”Different race alters are generally created for the stereotypic or imagined qualities of that race, as experienced or perceived by the host personality. Fike gives the example of a Caucasian patient with a Native American alter personality who represented spirituality and other-worldliness. “ we actually see Kali who is the embodiment of her religious counterpart.Kali is a (Hindu goddess). And Prasad is a holy offering to gods and goddesses in hinduism.

Kali’s name means “destroyer of all evil forces” and in mythology she was considered “ a divine protector and the one who bestows liberation to her children”. However , the goddess Kali’s iconography is generally associated with death and violence and paradoxically (at the same time) “motherly love”. Kali is sometimes considered the goddess of death but more accurately she “brings the death of ego”. She only kills demons. She is considered one of “the most compassionate of the gods because she provides liberation to her children”. She is commonly depicted holding a sword and the head of a demon. “A latitude soul sees mother Kali as very sweet, affectionate, and overflowing with incomprehensible love for her children” (the numbers and her gang of misfits).She is called the Divine Mother & Mother of the Universe. And when talking to El the sign there’s a says ‘spiritual advisor’ behind her.

“ It has been suggested that a male child that is being ab*sed might create a female headmate because he needs a "mother" role in the attempt to soften what might be angry and aggressive behavior on his part as a male DID sufferer. “

we see other evidence of her being an alter as well. Her saying she feels ‘whole’ with EL around. And In the episode before Kali is introduced. Will describes his now memories as “spreading” “growing” and “killing”. Meanwhile, after this Kali describes her and El’s wounds (caused by their father) in the same fashion. Kali describes how El has to face her trauma or else, like it did with her it will “spread.” Kali later makes a imaginary Brenner to tell El the same words Will said earlier- saying she has to face her trauma or else it will “grow” and “spread “ and “kill” her. in never ending story (reffed in s3) Sebastian who unbeknownst to him created an imaginary mythical world with characters who’d copy phrases their creator Sebastian said.

She also says everyone sees her and El as monsters because of their powers- something ww/mf feels (literally becoming one because of this and his ab*se). And Kali and El say that people hurt them -so they should be allowed to kill them. Kali making the distinction (more aligned with the mf) saying the people who hurt her are still after her -so she’s just making the first move and killing them as preemptive self defense. Something the mf also does, saying in s3 El could have killed him, and targeting those that hurt him and said they wanted to “kill” him in s2 . It’s the same logic as Kali.

And before kali and El talk we see kali look up to el, as they pass by graphiti that says ‘barbelith” which in the comics ‘the invisibles’- is the connection between humanity and the holographic world that we see. Aka her and Kali interacting in what’s actually the innerworld. Like Dustin said about the upsidedown “it’s a parallel world existing right beside you, without you even knowing it.”

why the tv of Kali’s tormenter (who tased her as a kid) is watching a show about a kid having a nightmare about being held down and having a needle put in her arm that kept getting bigger and bigger. Like how WW was pinned down and forced to take a shot in the arm.

Even the butterfly she creates could be possibly connected to WW- because butterfly decorations are above the byer’s phone (WW electercuted). And similar to Kali’s description the ficitonal russians (npcs) are also very stereotypical based on what an american kid might hear about ‘evil soviets’. They also use the same tasers as Kali’s ab*sers in the lab. In some movies it’s implied Lonnie may have tased his kids so maybe that’s why? And we see like how the gang tied up the mf to a chair, and shot him with a needle needle- the russians do the same to robin & steve.We also see Kali and El attack a man at a gas station -similar to the russian hitman npc from s3.

And Kali rescues a girl (npc) from a mental health hospital -called ‘dottie’ which is a term for being mentally ill. Lucas also claims El may have escaped from a psych hospital. Personally, i think this is foreshadowing of Mike helping Will out of one (like how Dustin and Lucas bring up ‘myers’ escaping one), but I digress. in Kali’s place grafiitti also says ‘o’bedlam’a poem about neglected mentally ill beggers . And compares her crew (of npcs) to herself and El- like dottie (mentally ill) because she’s part of a did system. Axel with his knife (lonnie loves his hunting knives and used to threaten Will with them and thus did so to el). And El and Will share the same stuffed bear- ‘so there’s the care bear’, one of kali’s crew even wears a clown mask, and axel wears the mummy mask seen at Melvald’s where Joyce works. There’s also the connection of the ‘rainbow room’ (with a rainbow drawing) on the door - relating to Kali & El and Will’s rainbow-ship drawing.And kali also likes rock music like Will/Billy. And when El first sees her-she’s near fire (ww connection).

El (caretaker & gate keeper alter)

“A gatekeeper is an alter who controls switching or access to front, access to inside or certain areas inside, or access to certain alters or memories. The existence of a gatekeeper is highly stabilizing for a system because gatekeepers can to some extent prevent unwanted switching, failure to switch when necessary, or failure to switch to the correct alter. They can help to prevent traumatic memories from bleeding from the alters who hold them to alters who could not yet handle them. They might police the boundaries between subsystems.These alters help prevent traumatized alters from fronting. This can be important because there is a chance that the trauma holders may want to harm the body.” In case you haven’t realized ... el is a horrible gate keeper-opening the gate and leaving it open for a year, not sensing it being reopened in s2 or 3 (too busy thinking about mike in s2/ dating him in s3), and thus causing more trauma to Will (who started to remember old confusing and traumatic memories), and causing Billy, and Max to be traumatized.

she’s also most likely a caretaking alter-“Caretaking alters are a type of a protector, they help manage and care for other alters, and sometimes external people (for example children). “

“They are often motherly, and may be modeled on a real person (WW’s appearance- WW looking like Will except having brown eyes, and El looking like the female equivalent). “Caretaking alters lack awareness of self-care and become exhausted easy; they only have a limited role and have little capacity for play, exploration or socializing.” El fighting to exhaustion, being isolated for most of her life and being in the cabin for 9 months (s2-3), comforting billy/Will, and again only not abiding by this when Mike is involved -hurting Max out of jealousy.

Her inability to speak well could be from neglect and social isolation, but ‘Ab*sive groups are known to have created alters which appear either "crazy" or learning disabled, for example training alters to scramble or garble words so they can’t report ab*se.Alters may be disabled when the body is not, for example a mute alter may be created in response to abusers instructions, e.g. "Don't talk.”

El also shows the trait of ‘memory sharing’.

Memory sharing

“We’ve managed to create a system within us. In order to grant access to memories with each other we have to come to know each other and gain each other's trust. Caroline says “when the memory sharing happens- the best way I can describe it to a non DID person is by asking you to remember/think about a movie with Wizards or characters like from twilight where they have the power to touch you and let you see their visions and/or memories. Sounds crazy I'm sure— but that's as close as I can possibly describe it.The memories literally pour into me exactly like that. “

After Will disappears, El appears to the audience for the first time. Having similar sounding names and having a striking resemblance (and 1 syllable nicknames ending in L) . Troy, Benny, Hopper, and an eyewitness all initally assuming she was a boy. Hopper even tries to track down El, assuming it was Will who’s hair was shaved- asking “could it be Lonnie’s kid?” and the man responding ��could of been the Byers boy”. Mike even says “Do you really think it’s a coincidence we found her in the same place Will disappeared?”The answer being No. The song “Alice” (from alice in wonderland) plays when El is at the restaurant -indicating El has entered a new world (our world). *Also, both Alexi and El are bribed with hamburgers to give the adults info they need.

El is an alter based on WW . Like WW she is afraid of the underwater sensory deprivation tanks her dad made her go into (Lonnie and ww with the tub). in s1 El used the pool/sensory deprivation to contact Will- the episode is even called “the tub” . And she thinks of this idea to talk to Will -after staring at the tub in the byers house and then remembering the deprivation tank. When in the pool or ‘tub’ at school the water slowly becomes dark as she enters the darkness- the void is a connection to the mf/ shadow monster.

She unlocks doors and it’s framed ominously just like the demogorgan does in the first ep. In d&d lore Mindflayers have “telekinetic abilities akin to mage hand (El was called a mage) and telekinesis.” I still think the mf may now have her telekenesis (which was originally his to begin with). We also see El fade away with the demogorgan as she and the demogorgan mimic each other’s body language. This was probably supposed to be El most likely integrating with the demogorgan (until the Duffers admitted to changing their minds). And In s1/2 she has black veins appear while not being possessed.

Dustin in s2 mentions the mf “doesn’t know it’s true home.” which is illustrated by El wandering around as Hopper, Becky, and kali try to convince her they’re her home. El saying she’s the monster in s1 is also how the mf aka WW feels about himself. And Will/ww was thrown in the dark trunk by Lonnie (perhaps after refusing to shoot an animal ) so for El it became Brenner throwing her in a dark room in solitary confinement after refusing to kill a cat. in s1 El draws similar to Will/ww and draws Brenner with a 3rd leg (cause even if brenner didn’t do so to her - the memory bled through from ww). Benny suspected El has been “ab*sed or something” and she didn’t seem to understand privacy -undressing in front of the boys.

El cries thinking of the time she killed a squirrel (typical hunting game) and eating it and somehow knowing how to make a fire (a Ww skill). El when re-enacting this forgotten experience of WW’s , spots a sketchy ominous hunter and throws a fired projectile at him and runs. Like WW who uses his fireballs to hurt the bad guys- in this case the hunters (Lonnie and his buddies). Similar to the demogorgan who killed 2 hunters in s1.

When she goes into the void and sees the demogorgan- we even hear a clock ticking in the background indicating this is associated with the past. When Will encounters the mf a similar thing happens- as the clock moves unnaturally. And similar to the mf she attacks her abusers and throws them into a wall (which mf did in s3). Throwing Nancy into a wall after she burned him.

Unfortunately in the ‘long kiss goodnight’ a girl with multiple personalities (Will/ww) was thrown and tied up in a trunk and when the trunk was opened the main villain tried to sell her for... you know . Then she escapes and jumps off a cliff into the water to escape the r**e (quarry flashback?) . This guy later tries to drown her too. While in skyfall, number-tattoos on the wrist were indicative of being sold into the s*x tr*de (El/kali’s tattoos- Will saw something?) . I really hope this isn’t the case - but this is the man who wanted to make money off his son’s death to to pay off his gambling debt. In one movie the bad guy sold his gf for a case of beer and some smokes, while playing a card game. And unfortunately, the fact Will was triggered to see the mf after Mike says “i’m not pr*stituting my sister?” may indicate something from the past as well (maybe Jon saying something ?). Along with El being chased by “bad men”. It’s possible those 2 hunters were pals with lonnie and got what was coming to them. On to the next point-

El - is the Cannanite (male) god associated with “salt water “ (pool filled with salt in s1) who “dwelled in a tent” (in s1 Mike’s blanket fort) . In s1 El owns a male lion doll and Will has a female lion . The fact El first appeared looking like a boy, is named after a male god, El in spanish translates to “he”, and she has a male lion toy could symbolize a few things. In ‘prince of tides’ when the boy cried the dad yelled for him to go put on a dress.In ‘the cell’ the ab*sive father beat his young son with a belt, burned, and drowned him (causing a seizure), threw homophobic slurs at him, and called him a ‘women’ multiple times while beating him. And said “I’ll teach you to be a woman.” Some specialists say one of MANY possible reasons a boy may have a female alter is cause they were “forced to cr*ss dress “ but obviously that’s not the only possible reason. (And no, this doesn’t apply to trans women- making sure no one tries putting words in mouth). I think of the moment where boyish-looking El runs away into the woods, and takes off her wig and screams in anger at the reflection of herself in the water -may be a recreated event from the past). The fact El [is a male god] and in spanish El (the way it’s spelled in the show means “he’) is also possibly intentional . In addition to the fact El is the only alter who physically resembles Will and is the only one with a buzzcut , unlike Kali (who in the flashback at Hawkins lab had all her hair) is something to take note. El could be an inverse of Will’s experience. El as a girl was stripped of her femininity from her papa. Because Will was a boy forced to dress girly cause of his dad . El having a male lion and Will having a female lion being used to symbolize this. WW was the one who went through this abuse and also had brown eyes like El ( unlike Will)- so in regards to physical appearence she is his ‘girl version’.Since like many ab*sers Lonnie gave Will mixed messages he could never abide by . In mad max furry road the villain named ‘daddy’ forced his sl*ve to shave their head and branded them with a tattoo like El (he also had 3 s*x s**ves)

-in s2 the song ‘don’t mess around with Jim’ plays. Upon character introductions of lyrics “Jim walker” pans to Jim Hopper and “boy named Will-ie Mccoy” (pans to El).

-Hopper in ep1 mention (El)eanor Gilipse-surname of girl in silent hill with powers/DID.

-the never ending story ref also alludes to how El was created by Will similar to another superpowered human (ww). El is atreyu and Will is sebastian. El is atreyu- who is said to be the chosen one. He falls from a great height and on to the beach shore, and comes across abandoned ruins, and then the villain gmork latches his jaws on to his leg (like El). It’s revealed atreyu isn’t actually the chosen one and everyone was wrong . And it was actually the poor human kid (Sebastian - who has a bowl cut and one parent and secretly had imagination-powers ) . Atreyu is told to look at the mirror of his ‘true self’ and is shocked to see Sebastian (his unknown creator) looking back at him. “turn around , look at what you see. In her face- the mirror of your dreams.”

-In the novel Sebastian even temporarily went evil when he lost all his memories except those of his father- similar to Will/ww. Sebastian created the whole fantasy story and it’s inhabitants (with their own sentience). So only he had the capability to remove the darkness from the fantasy world they inhabited. The darkness representing the loss of hopes and dreams.

-Elfen lied (another inspo for the series according to the duffers)- has a Super-powered protagonist/anti hero/ and tragic villain.”She has three split personalities due to past trauma . The three are Lucy, Nyu, and Kaede. Kaede : (childhood love/friend of Kouta) from ‘mapple house’ (cough- ‘mapple street’/ Will). Nyu: is mentally the age of a young child in the body of an adult, who can barely speak, and found by Kouta after she escapes the lab who experimented on her .Nyu is like a very sheltered child and has a very tiny outlook on the actual world and can only speak one word at the start of the anime (El).Lucy:Her violent personality, who has a distaste and hate for humans after humans traumatized her as a child. Although deep down she wants to be human (mf).”

We also see both the Will/mf and El called spies, have ptsd, described as ‘quiet’, and had their dads force them to kill animals. El growls like an animal after the mf growls at her first. And in regards to the supernatural Ww and El both have powers. They both could communicate through different dimensions using electronics. Both of their moms’ had “crazy aunts” . Both are called “schizos” in s2 because of their powers (did is most commonly misdiagnosed with schizophrenia which i do think that will occur initially- mrs driscoll not being believed about the supernatural because of her being a ‘paranoid schizophrenic’ is foreshadowing). Both Will and her had their brain waves monitored at the lab and their measurements were off the charts, plus they were being unknowingly recorded on video.They both tore through walls (with that pink gunk between the normal world and upside down). El even goes through the entrance covered in goo (like a baby) as a hint she was born from the upsidedown!

We see in Terry’s place (El’s room) symbols associated with Will- clowns and rabbits ( like how Lonnie made Jon kill rabbits on hunting trips). They even chose white rabbits- like those in Alice in wonderland and earlier associated with El.

El/ww can also both can track others when concentrating -Ww found Hopper, El found Will. Both communicated psychically by transferring their conscious- El to talk to Mike in his basement using the void (in s2) & Will to his mom in the living room (in s1). Also before Will goes missing , he asks Dustin for his X-men comic- later in reference to El, Dustin asks “Do you think El was born with her powers like the X-men?” And when Mike says El is “channeling him (Will)”. Dustin says “like professor x”-clearly hinting that they were both born with powers, like the X-men.

However, El is how Max described “her own person.” When Dustin says she’s “like a wizard (like ww) Mike corrects him and says “more like yoda.” And the longer she stays in the real world the more differences she has to Will/ww as she evolves into her own person. She doesn’t have many interests in common with Will :d&d, scifi, computers, science, horror movies etc. And like i’ve explained in other posts - she isn’t actually in love with Mike. And her obsession with mike not only inhibits her role as an alter but her own independence/personhood , along with Will’s healing ( which depends on Mike and other’s support). I think the main reason we never see Will & El interact significantly (despite the parallels) is because they’re growing apart as they develop as people and go on divergent paths. I feel like if someone doesn’t integrate it’s most likely El (and probably Max). While Kali most likely integrates- since she was brought to tears by seeing another alter and said she feels “complete” with El - hinting she’ll probably desire to integrate into Will/ww in the future. in ‘annihalation’ a poc woman with a 8 tattoo on her arm integrates with others into a god like creature too . EL may eventually go by Elle [in french means ‘she’] when she becomes her own person, and gains independence, perhaps?

demogorgan (fictional alters or ‘fictive’)

“Fictional introjects specifically are based off of fictional characters. These characters can be from television shows, movies, books, fantasy, and other forms of fiction.They don't have to think, act, look, or feel in the exact same ways that the fictional character does. Some fictional introjects can be ab*sive, and form as a way to continue traumatizing the system.”

“ One of the main purposes of a father introject is to control your behavior when you are away from the father with the same intensity as if you were right in front of him. The father may have a variety of parts that are loyal to him, his beliefs, his ways, etc.’

in d&d a demogorgon is a “demon from the abyss”. And are also called “the deep father” , indicating his connection of being based on Lonnie. We even see Lucas hand Will a ‘devil’s baby’ firecracker (and behind will is a sign that says demon-dog) to indicate that Will’s father is the ‘devil’. The demogorgan is also first referred to as “the man without a face” in the show. Steve suggesting he does have a face but he was wearing a mask. And when Lonnie first ‘comes back’ to Hawkins Jon says “mom, did that thing (demogorgan) come back.” And Lonnie cuts him off after the comment saying ‘that’s enough’. Lonnie also mentions to Joyce he explored the woods where Will went missing. And later Jon mentions how the demogorgan only ventures several miles from his house -like lonnie. Jon also tells Nancy about how his dad forced him to go on hunting trips and in s1 we see the demorgorgan kill a deer (typical game), attack hunters, and capture Will in the shed (which contained the riffle and sleeping bags for camping). We are also told in s1 Lonnie taught Will baseball, and when the demorgorgan knocks the bat out of Jon’s hand he gets on top of him- putting his face close like he was about to kiss him. We even see in s2 - the pic of the mf next to a baseball bat and mitt. And the demogorgan on multiple occasions was mistaken for a bear (which Will sketches and El also is into teddy bears) and bears symbolically represent “wisdom” (will the wise).

And Lonnie when closing the hole in the wall says someone has to be blamed for what happened to Will- and it transitions to Mike tearing a hole in paper and explaining what happened to Will with the demogorgan. Lonnie caused the ‘tear’ in Will’s psyche. Lonnie is even the one to mention how people ‘make things up to cope.’And how people in the city are “more real” (possible alter foreshadowing).

In d&d demorgorgons also have 2 heads with distinct personalities, one wanting to stay as one and the other wishing to separate (a hint at Will’s DID and the fight between WW wanting to integrate personalities and Will not wanting to do so).

~El ,Kali, and the demogorgon being alters is why we see the lights flicker when the demogorgan appears , and (sometimes) when El and kali use their powers- cause they’re based off ww who has lightning/electricity powers which we saw in s1. Causing the lights to flicker at Mike’s place, turning the bike light on with his mind, causing sparks of electricity to come out of the phone 2x , using lights telepathically to talk to joyce (blinking ‘once for yes and twice for no’, and using the lights to tell Joyce to “run”).

demodogs/dart (animal alters)

“In some cases, what presents as an animal is really a child alter acting as an animal. This is found in cases where the abused child was forced to act as an animal, usually a dog.”

In mad-max the r**ist biker gang - ties up one of their victims on a leash like a dog. In unleashed the adoptive father made his son where a collar and called him ‘his dog’. ‘Orphan’ the girl wore a collar and the bullies pulled on it calling her a ‘doggie’ and she starts screaming and having an episode in school. In s1 Hopper says he likes the book cujo , that one of the guards is reading, and at the end of the book they replace the dog Cujo with a dog named Willie. In ‘the cell’ the villain put dog collars on his m*rder v*ctims cause he wanted to ‘own them’. In ghost Busters, Mike -is Venkman- and Will -is Dana Barret. Dana finds a demon-dog in her fridge, and hires the ghost busters. And right before Venkman goes on a date with her she is possessed by the big-bad, Zuul, (who controls demo(n)-dogs). The s4 movies also allude to Lonnie possibly k**ling chester his dog cause when he was stalking Will (offscreen) chester would bark at him - like how he barked at the demogorgan - one of the only other times we hear a dog bark is when we see Lonnie (at his place).

*There’s also the parallels of Dart to El. Dart killed a cat. While El’s papa tried to make her kill a cat (which dogs stereotypically don’t like-Lonnie most likely forced Will to kill a cat. ).Heck the russians even reference cats -linking them to El and the demodog. El/Dart also both have sweet tooths (eggos and 3 muskateers). Both were called traitors and ran away- and initially caused a rift in the group. And dustin and Mike said they made “promises” to El/dart and that dart/el “trusted them” (mike &Dustin)”. Lucas in s1 also called El a ‘dog’ and El asked, annoyed, if she was Mike’s “pet”.

Jim hopper : Introject & adult alters

“System introjects are alters who are replications of a person from the outside world , who often believe they are the actual person (and not the replication). They may adamantly believe that they are a different person . These parts contain a lot of memories, factual information, emotional realities for how it was like to be near the outside person.Introjects can also be based off of figures that the dissociative child found strong, courageous, heroic, or otherwise worthy of being emulated and internalized and could theoretically protect them.”Jim even means to “supplant” (replace) or “supresede” (take the place of a person or thing previously in authority or use). Meaning, there was a Jim Hopper (Joyce knew in highschool) and a Jim Hopper alter based on him.

“older adult alters are created to serve a nurturing or parenting role, thus serving as a protector. (*protecting Will/el) . However, sometimes the age is related to taking on the identification of the ab*ser, and can therefore take on any of the other more hostile roles... Introjects which are mimicking ab*sers are trying to "keep you inline" in order to protect you from external ab*sers. They don’t dare relax their vigilance or let you fall away from the OLD RULES that were once so important.They are trying so hard to keep you safe. “

We even see the convo he has with El, is similar to Neil and his ex wife- a man berating the girl after coming home, calling her a liar, and asking about what man they saw. And El yelling and saying Hopper is “like papa” when he yells at her (the same season dr owens called him Will’s “pop”. Would not be surprised if Lonnie would berate Will about seeing Mike. There’s even a physical resemblance- blonde, blue eyes, and similar moustaches to him and Neil.And he also parallels Billy & Max in s3 with the ‘door’ imagery.

“Being an introject is a difficult and thankless task. This member of your system has spent all these years acting out a role that they dislike every bit as much as you do.” *(berating El about the rules- that were most likely initially Lonnie’s. A part of me suspects that cabin wasn’t Hopper’s grandfather’s but Lonnie’s secret cabin where he took Will. And berate Will about seeing Mike. He was shown in s1 fixing the hole in the wall. And Hopper says about the cabin “ A LOT OF HISTORY HERE’ ).

We see other alter hints too -He taught El morse code (which Will already knew). Murray says Hopper reminds Joyce of a previous “bad relationship” (lonnie). And the russians in order to get info, t*rture steve and threaten to rip out his finger nails , while, Hopper threatens to break the mayor’s fingers for info.

And when a Russian goes into the carnival game in a room with tigers and clowns, the speaker says “ if you dare enter the cave of horrors you may never know what you may find around the corner (clown laughs) . Don’t show your fear in the presence of the tiger or you may never escape this cave alive”.As he jumps out the tiger roars in unison with Hopper leaps out to attack.

The song you ‘don’t mess around with jim’ (from s2 and 3 that Jim dances and sings to ) is about a boy named Willie beating up a thug (who wears a hat) named Jim (representing resentment of father figures). We see Villains have zoom in shots of their cigareete trays- like the h*tman, Billy posessed by the mf, and Hopper before he yells and threatens El in s2.

In s1 It’s implied Hopper is addicted to pills , was an alcoholic (both him and Lonnie have many beer cans and cigareettes in their house- would not be surprised if Lonnie also had a pill addiction too) .

Introjects “ are NOT the actual ab*ser. They are a victim, a single part within a large beautiful mind, bred from the survivor's essence.They are just copying behaviors shown to them by bad people, not harboring the intent, s*dism or imm*rality of the actual perpetrators.”

“The introject in your system was there to help you when the stakes were very high and their job was deadly serious. It’s difficult for them to let go of that level of urgency. introjects represent how important it was, at one time in your life, to always be vigilant. Danger was always near you and you had to be careful of every move and every word, because your very survival might depend on not doing or saying the wrong thing at the wrong time.”

‘ introjects also represent the desperate hope that, if you could only do everything just right, obey all your ab*ser’s rules and anticipate exactly what was wanted of you, that it might lessen or even prevent some of the ab*se from happening. And gain approval or love from the ab*ser.”

We also see how he’s based on the mf/ww in a few ways: he describes his depression in s3 as being in a “deep dark cave” (the supernatural cave in s2/cave of horrors at the fair) and in s2 he says he thinks of himself as a “black hole” that will destroy everything around him including his daughter (the mf/Lonnie).

Now, cause people will mention it. We can’t take everything David says about Jopper seriously- he filmed s4 in advanced and lied constantly about the duffer’s not contacting him prior to this. I think he bs-es a lot and occasionally throws in hints. Like how in behind stranger things after mentioning Lonnie and Bob he compares jopper- to Jack and Evelyn from china town (who slapped her for lying -like Neil did to his wife. And we see duffers laugh hysterically and shawn exchange a look with them cause they know David is giving a hint that isn’t positive). And evelyn was also r*ped by her father (there’s at least 30+ st movies the Duffers have cited with that dad plot point, unfortunately . Along with about 6-10 DID movies). David said in an interview with total film : “ In terms of Stranger Things, you’ll be able to look back at season one and see a lot of things that happen further down the line that relate to that.I’ve had those discussions with them from the very first season. We were always interested in that idea of the Gandalf resurrection – Gandalf the Grey who fights the Balrog and then becomes Gandalf the White.” Well this is a lothr ref (Which Will is into) but i think it’s also just a Will and ww hint -since in silent Hill when Alessa and cheryl mege back into 1 they become a deity- a serene white-clad figure, even the dragon relates to Will. But, there’s also the fact David in multiple interviews describes Hopper as a ‘little boy’ . After s4 started he said about Hopper with Gold DERBY “ he’s also like a little boy who has been just so traumatized and so hurt that he can’t really have relationships with people that are full and that are honest... it makes it difficult for him to get close to people... all the joyce st-...There’s a lot to be revealed around the complexities of that story . Because when we know the ending you’ll be able to go back and watch it and see what we were planting in s3 , that paid off in s4 and s5. That will make those intimacy issues a lot more understandable.”

Since Hopper-alter thinks he’s the real-Hopper (Joyce’s old friend/ possible ex) he hits on Joyce.There’s the references to back to the future. Steve incorrectly saying it’s about alex keaton “trying to b*ng his mom.” And stobin’s exchange about the movie alludes to what Jopper actually is “I think that lady is trying to bang her son/ no, but, they’re the same age?/ He needs to get back to the future ,which is his time, cause he’s stuck in the past (trauma)/ W-What?”

And the season where Jopper was the most evident we see another alter (Billy) hitting on someone who is old enough to be/ resembles his mom. Her being a wheeler could also represent Will’s repressed feelings for Mike. Along with Illustrating his subconscious issues with parental figures cause of Lonnie. Dianne (Hopper’s ex wife) - even is a roman goddess of hunting.

In s2 Nancy asks Steve how his “grandpa’s time in the war is a metaphor for your life?” And steve compares the mf to the germans in the war. Dr owens mentions Will has ptsd like “ (vietnam) soldiers’, Hopper saying he had buddies like Will . “In the 70s there was a study that compared the post-traumatic stress symptoms in Vietnam veterans and adult survivors of childhood s**ual ab*se. The study revealed that childhood s**ual ab*se is traumatizing and can result in symptoms comparable to symptoms from war-related trauma.” Hopper isn’t actually in Russia -but in one of the innerworlds (after he jumped through the rift of the machine- into Will’s mind). We’ll see flashbacks but also present circumstances of his imprisonment echo Will’s past with Lonnie (if the movies indicate anything)- being starved, guards getting payed in order to let other prisoners r*pe a gay prisoner (than claim incorrectly because of his sexuality he wanted it) , as well as a gang of sadist men who r**e others and a warden using that as a threat to be compliant , being thrown in a dark room of solitary confinement and starved when they didn’t obey the warden, the warden being religious, etc. And the Anerican soldiers (in Vietnam) in the movies aren’t much better and do similarly horrific acts to civilians like r**e and bragging/ happily k*lling women, children, and the elderly. The drill sergant in vietnam calling them homophobic slurs & women, and chocking one of the soldiers with one hand, slapping one for not believing in christianity. Tying up a soldier in a bed , gagging him, beating him and saying “remember it’s just a dream.” Only praising them when good in fire arms.(movies : fullmetal jacket, papillon, shawshank redemption, platoon, welcome to marwen, etc ) . My assumption is while in solitary he has flashbacks of his life- and it’s more hints about him being an alter -the boxes in the basement are “vietnam” ,“dad”, and “ny” (and these are the memories of his we’ll see). And some of the bad characters in said stories will also parallel Lonnie . For instance in s2, Jonathan mentions Indiana writer Vonnegut- In his book ‘slaughterhouse 5′- Vonnegut begins the story of Billy Pilgrim, a man who has “come unstuck in time”. It accounts of Billy Pilgrim's capture and incarceration by the Germans during the last years of World War II, and scattered throughout the narrative are episodes from Billy's life with his dad, and his own wife and kids.Billy is forced to be part of the war and similar things against his free will. The moments start from his childhood when his father throws him in the water to teach him how to swim. He was unwillingly drafted into the war. Later, he is kidnapped by Tralfamadorians (aliens that are implied to be caused by his mental health issues/trauma) against his will. Therefore, he realizes that this concept is just an illusion.

We also see Hopper being violent/aggressive to Mike foreshadowing how Lonnie will treat Mike (difference is it’ll be played completely serious).

Sara : “littles “ also called a child alter (not based on ww)

“Child alters often talk in a child-like way, but unlike a biological child they can normally understand abstract concepts and long words. Some child parts may ... be playful and fun-living and have only positive memories. A child alter may also be an idealized representation of the "perfect child" from the "perfect" family, for example the "good boy/girl."

we see this in a few ways- Sarah winning the spelling bee (like Will winning the science fair) and Hopper describing her as very intelligent, but not knowing where she gets it from. She in the 1st episode is said to love science like Will (who won the science fair 4x) , and knows how to spell words like ‘odontalgia’. In s1, Joyce and Hopper pretend with Sara and Will to be a witch and an ogre eating them.And in s1 Will and her both own cat plushies. she has a tiger plushie (mascot of Will’s school, like with billy’s baseball mascott also being a tiger/ Will’s painting). And her hospital gown has clowns on it (Will’s fear). Hopper even pauses and has a flashback of sarah’s tiger when he sees Will’s lion plushie in the upsidedown .And when Will has a vine in his mouth imagines sarah with tubes in her mouth.We see despite the fact Hopper didn’t move to Hawkins until after her death- she appears to be at Hawkins lab?

And Holly’s drawing is similar to el’s in s1.And , in s1, like Will she has an episode alluding to her seeing the void as she turns her head scared seeing something no one else can.Then in s2, Hopper says Sarah became obsessed with blackholes - and latter says that blackhole (mf?) got her. It’s possible she saw the void or even the mf and misinterpreted it as a blackhole. And so she didn’t actually die of cancer - it was probably just symbolic of her integrating into the mf/ww (the blackhole ‘getting her’). Or it’s possible she’s just alive/in stasis in the innerworlds after her ‘simulated death’

Also can we mention how there’s lions, tigers,and bears (as plushies)- oh my. Along with the whole “home references”. Wizard of oz is on the movie list, and 2 wizard of oz movies shown in s3.

Robin Buckley

Robin Buckley (possibly an alter?)- Robin discusses with steve the legend of Prometheus , who not only gave human beings the gift of fire, and therefore civilization, but created them, giving them the gift of life. El watches frankenstein in s2 whose novel was titled “the modern prometheus”(another hint WW/Will created El). Steve when looking at Robin even says the biblical verse “let there be light” (the beginning of creation and human beings-i.e Robin).”And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.” (wow this doesn’t sound just like the black-watery-void in the upsidedown at all) XD. Robins were also considered holy birds by the God thor (the god of Thunder and lightning). She’s gay, into comics, rides a bike, and is afraid of drs just like Will is, and was tied to a chair for info like ww. She references surfing (billy) and has a spy storyline. She’s a smart, into rock music and wants to fit in . And makes fun of her friends’ love-lives to hide her own insecurities about her own romantic feelings and sexuality (that weren’t accepted at that time). And has feelings for a girl who can’t sing (mike) who pays too much attention to a person who didn’t even like them (Steve/El) . Buckley could be a ref to a ‘buck’ deer (like the one the demogorgan killed in s1/ typical hunting game). And another legend says that the Robins were red because it scorched its bre*st in the fires of Purgatory, mercifully taking drops of water in its beak for the lips of the parched souls in torment( the opposite of devil-lonnie).Robins also feature in the traditional children's tale Babes in the Wood, the birds out of kindness cover the de*d b*dies of the 2 abandoned children found in the woods with strawberry leaves (who had been k*lled by an abusive family member) . Not sure if mrs driscoll (being a strawberry name is a coincidence to that whole cherry/strawberry/heathers movie ref with alexi? Robin is also a unis*x/male name like most of the other gals on the list. While her crush ‘tammy’ (means ‘twin’. could be a clue about Robin being an alter?).

the rebuttal could be simply: buckley can mean ‘goat’ which would match her bff’s surname Harrington (’he-goat’). And just be a cute little nod to them.While Robin means ‘bright fame’ just like our fallen super-hero Bob ( since robin and bob are nicknames for Robert)- so could also be a simple nod to him.But her names could be both a nod and a deep ref- who knows.

Barb

Barb- Barbara means “strange” or “foreign” , while Barb means “stranger”. Her name could also be based on the saint Barbara- who was carefully guarded by her father who kept her locked up in a tower (like Hopper & Brenner to El/Lonnie to Will) in order to preserve her from the outside world . He later tries killing her. However, as punishment, he was struck by lightning on the way home and his body was consumed by flame (connection to ww who likes using fireballs against bad guys and who also has lightning powers). She’s best friends with a wheeler (although pictures show us unlike byler they’re not childhood friends). she may have been queer coded and had feelings for her bff (moping after Nancy leaves to sleep with Steve) . In a s1 flashback Will specifically watched ‘poltergeist’ with his mom- and is then thrust into the same scenario as the little girl (being trapped in another dimension- where the mothers can only hear their voices and communicate to them through electronics ). And barb’s pool scene echos the pool scene in the movie too-a women being attacked in a pool ( and could be considered similar to being attacked in a tub/sensory deprivation tank). And similar to El , she wakes up in the upsidedown and pukes up a white fluid calling for Wheeler- but gets no help. Unlike Will. For Halloween she also dressed up as a scary clown (Will’s fear) when Nancy dressed up as a bunny (an animal lonnie forced them to kill). She also is dragged away in a similar way to Billy -down stairs.

Her mom’s first name (Marsha) also has the same meaning as Martin Brenner- ‘war like’. A hint Lonnie is violent or maybe was a vet?

Other npcs

Besides the russians, we also have some of the americans who experimented in Hawkin’s lab: most notably Brenner and becky/terry Ives.

“Some survivors will internalize their family into their own DID system.“

Brenner and Lonnie have similar appearances (and in the original script he was suppose to be unshaved and wear plaid and jeans... prob too obvious to keep) . They forced their kids to kill animals, threw them in a dark places, submerged them into water, and also praised them when violent, and tied people to beds (yes lonnie did that - why mf and terry are both tied up there). Brenner even means- ‘someone who cleared forests by burning (showing his connection to ww with fire, and because forests is where hunting/ab*se took place).His collegue - the blond women’s name , Fraizer means - “of the forrest men” (the male hunters who terrorized Will/ww most likely).

Terry/ Becky Ives.Becky means “snare-a trap for catching birds or animals”. While Terry (Teressa means “huntress’) .While Ives means- yew wood (a tree).Terry’s backstory should also raise eyebrows when we see when going to Hawkin’s lab that the Byers’ car is there (a tip off this story isn’t reality but from Will’s subconscious).

Terry also turns in pain on the bed and sees sunflowers. And Will has a sunflower book next to his bed.

While Terry has an appearance similar to Jon’s (blonde and almond shaped brown eyes and Terry is a unis*x name) and both steal guns and drive a long distance in order to help rescue Will/el. This is the season of ‘mr mom’ after all (where Jon takes pics of Will on Halloween just like the other moms). Becky also compares Terry to Joyce too by saying Hopper would have been her type . And both joyce and terry/becky have a “crazy aunt” and were both deemed as ‘crazy’ when not believed about their children being kidnapped and indeed alive. we also see in El’s room (that Terry decorated) -bunnies (that lonnie forced the boys to kill) and clowns (Will’s fear). Along with fox’s which were in castle byers. We also see Owl’s in both the byers’ and Ive’s house (which also represent ‘paranomal wisdom’). And Winona mentioned the movie ‘prince of sands’ in an st interview. In that the psychiatrist interviews the older brother to fill in the memory-gaps of his sister (who has DID so can’t remember) he eventually admits both were r*ped as kids. And also tells a story in therapy about how their mom m*scarried and the dad threw the st*llborne in the freezer over night-so let’s hope throwing the demodog in the freezer and Terry’s miscarriage doesn’t have that traumatizing meaning. It’s also possible Terry isn’t an npc but a type of alter-given how her and El participated in ‘memory sharing’ and Terry’s power’s affected lights.”An alter may be stuck in an eternal flashback or refuse to accept that anything has changed since the period of time during which they experienced trauma“ (Terry being trapped in the time-loop after being tied to the bed/attacked).

Npcs ...but possibly other alters

I believe susie was a npc created because Will felt bad for Dustin - after the max/lucas situation. so he made what he assumed would be the perfect girl for him. She even has the same name as Max’s mom:susie vs susan. He met her from camp ‘Knowhere’ ( she’s from no where). The blonde american spy (who is also an npc) even mentions a science tech camp in s1 that dustin goes to in s3 .She has space related stuff in her room like sarah, wizard of oz poster (referencing Will), and she reads the ‘wizard of Earthsea’ -about a boy-wizard named jed who realizes the evil ancient shadow he’s been fighting is actually the dark part of his personality -and he needs to merge with it to bring balance. Everyone questions if she’s real or exists- similar to el asking Kali “are you real?”Stranger things instagram posted a fake movie poster- emulating ‘weird science’. A movie about 2 boys creating a ‘perfect women’ from scratch for them and comparing this created gal to susie (they aren’t endgame with this girl in the movie-despite her original programing). Like susie/dustin not being endgame.

Dustin on his canon spotify playlist even has the song ‘weird science’.Her appearance is based off what most boys liked, celeb ‘phoebe kates’. And it may be just a narrative device but in s2 Max lies about mormons at the door, the season before she appears.

And of course her song alludes to what’s happening in the narrative. “Make believe I'm everywhere Given in the light (demogorgan/ lonnie in shed) .dream a dream and what you see will be ( his nightmares based on his ‘memories’)/Rhymes that keep their secrets WILL unfold behind the clouds (mf on his clouds and lightning).And there upon a rainbow (Will/ his powers/ accepting his queer identity and healing) Is the answer to a never ending story.’

Similarly, Heather Holloway is most likely from Will’s mind (my guess an alter)-and her appearence is also based on Phoebe. In the show , they reference ‘fast times’ where Phoebe wears a red bathing suit just like Heather. Billy also mimics phoebe by slow-mo walking in a red bathing suit to the same song phoebe did in the movie.

After El and Max see the pic of Heather and her dad the lyric ‘loving you is a sin’ plays. And she shows an aggression mostly to her father- with her mom she simply dr*gs her but for her father she hits him in the head with a bottle and gags him with a rag and ties him up and throws him in the trunk after she was similarly tied up and thrown in the trunk (unlike the mom who was in the back seat). Billy and Heather were the ones with the most focus during their possessions - and Will said the mf would target “another me” ( another Will). She is str*ngled in the shower and later drowned in a tub into a dark abyss screaming for help before merging with the mf. Both susie and heather are names symbolizing flowers.Susie- means Lily. While Heather is also a variety of small shrubs with pink or white flowers which commonly grow in rocky areas.Holloway is a topographic surname, which was given to a person who resided near a physical feature such as a hill, stream, or type of tree. Also her dad (Tom- means ‘twin’ which could be another DID hint.like Tammy Tompson along with their names being associated with the nature/woods where ab*se took place).

Possible npcs or alters (BUT possibly just normal people from the real world) :

Murray Bauman (possibly an npc or alter?)- Between seasons Joyce mentioned going to Chicago with Will for therapy- where murray is from. Similar to Will who has a ‘do not enter” sign . Murray has a “keep door closed”. Both are proficient with shotg*ns . Murray drinks and smokes a lot like Hopper/Lonnie. He makes up a story about how what happened to Barb being a chemical leak. And next season the possessed are consuming chemicals and the npc russians are experimenting with chemicals. Hopper lied in s1 about having a friend from the times- and in s2 Murray from the times magically appears. He says Jon is easier to read than Nancy and immediately pegs his issues with his dad. He references Wizard of Oz by saying “people don’t like looking behind the curtain” (in the movie what was behind the curtain was a wizard-Will). He also has cameras everywhere like the american npcs. Also, it’d be pretty funny if he was investigating crazy conspiracies like aliens but never realized he was a part of one all along.

Erica-Not on the inspo list but she could be like Buffy’s sis from buffy the vampire slayer. The memories of Buffy and her associates were altered, along with relevant records, so that they believed Dawn always existed as Buffy's sister. Dawn is, however, a real girl, Buffy's biological sister, and has real memories of her fictional childhood. Erica has rainbows/sunflowers in her room in s2 (connected to Terry). And Erica is a plant that means “HEATHER”.

what all these possible alters /npc’s generally have in common is unlike ‘natural people’ they all have names associated with hunting or the woods (because that’s where a lot of the ab*se most often took place). name meaning : becky - snare (a trap for catching birds or animals). Teressa-huntress. Dianne (Hopper’s ex wife) - is a roman goddess of hunting. brenner- ‘someone who cleared forests by burning’. the blond women, Brenner worked with, Fraizer- “of the forrest men” (the male hunters who terrorized Will most likely). mayfield- open country (field) where madder (mæddre) grows', Hargrove-grove filled with rabbits" , Holland- wood land, Bruce (who was also possessed) - means WILLow lands .ives- yew wood (of tree) ,Bauman: comes from the German word "baum," or "boum" in Middle High and Old German, meaning "tree’. Bauman may have originally been a nickname for someone who lived by a tree. Holloway is a topographic surname, which was given to a person who resided near a physical feature such as a hill, stream, or type of tree. Suzie- lily flower. Susan (Max’s mom)- means lily, lotus flower or rose. Heather is also a variety of small shrubs with pink or white flowers which commonly grow in rocky areas. Neil -cloud. Buckley- buck deer. Rhadaghast (Will’s castle byers password)- is a wizard who protects the forrest and it’s creatures.

or an association with fire/lightning/god: robin- bird of the God Thor , sara- married abraham who tried to k*ll his son for god, barabara- saint who’s ab*sive father tried to k*ll her for not believing in his religion- so he was electrocuted and lit on fire by god. Kali/El are names of gods

the main exceptions being Hopper an interject . Although Hop could be a bunny pun, he even references bunnies in s3. And Jim meaning to “supplant” /“suprecede” ( replace/take the place of a person or thing previously in authority or use) hints at him being an interject.And heather’s dad Tom (who was possessed means ‘twin’) like Robin’s crush Tammy (’twin’) Thompson (’son of tom’) . And Marsha Holland (barb’s mom) & Martin Brenner both have first names meaning ‘war-like” (a hint at Lonnie being warlike, or being a vietnam vet perhaps?)

Ok, guys that’s about it- I hope you enjoyed. :)

#will byers #el hopper #billy hargrove #max mayfield #jim hopper #robin buckley #stranger things #kali prasad

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delos-mio · 4 years ago

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Out of the Woods - College!AU - PART 1

A/N: Welp, here it is! Part 1 of my silly little AU for my favorite silly little king. I really hope I can do him justice and I greatly appreciate any comments and questions you may have! No major triggers- only implied drug use, drinking, allusion to sexy stuff. So, without further ado..

If you had to gaze into a crystal ball at the beginning of the year, this would not have been the future you expected to see. You didn’t plan on being unhoused, stuck in an idle relationship, and debating dropping out of school all together. But here you were, trying your very best to pick up the pieces, salvage what little motivation to carry on that you had left. It could have been worse. It could have been much worse, at least that’s what you kept telling yourself to keep from crumbling entirely. You were never one to back down though, and these few hurdles sure as hell weren’t going to be the thing to break you. At least one of your problems was solved.

You had just emptied the last of the boxes left from moving and were hanging up the rest of your clothes when there was a soft knock on your door. Genya popped her head in, smiling brightly.

“Hey. I was just making sure you were getting settled ok,” she said.

“Yeah, I’m just about done unpacking I think.” You sat down next to her on the edge of your bed. “Thanks again for letting me live here. You have no idea how much you saved his ass,” you laughed.

“Don’t mention it! I’m happy to have someone else here, honestly.” She seemed to mean it, so you decided not to keep groveling. “Anyways, I just had a friend text me about a party tonight if you wanted to go?”

Your party days were almost entirely behind you. Freshman and Sophomore year were a haze of booze and recreational drugs, leading to you almost flunking out of school on more than one occasion. You’d since cleaned up your act, for the most part, and found you way back on the Dean’s list. But...it was a Friday afterall. And you’d just spent all day moving and contemplating your entire life- did that not earn a beer or two?

“Yeah, ok. Ok. That sounds good,” you said with a nod.

“Awesome! I think we’re meeting there around 10ish, so I’ll come grab you to get ready in a little bit.”

“Get ready? Are we 18 and going to our first frat party?” you joked, making Genya laugh.

“I was thinking about it more so as a roomie bonding activity, but if you wanna be a brat…” she drawled, trying to keep the smile off her face.

“Come back in an hour,” you finally sighed. Genya looked simply delighted as she exited, very clearly planning out looks for you both in her head.

As you went to finish up organizing your closet, you felt the familiar buzz of your phone in your pocket.

Matt: u coming over tonight?

You couldn’t stop your eyes from rolling back in your skull. That probably shouldn’t happen when you get a text from your boyfriend.

Y: can’t, sorry. Going out with Genya M: ok- have fun. Make good choices. Y: wtf does that mean M: just to make good choices? Jesus does everything have to be a fight? Y: i’m not trying to fight omg Y: i’ll just talk to you later M: k

K. He had some fucking nerve.

---

Across campus, Nikolai wasn’t having much better of an evening.

"Do I have to?"

"Yes." Aleks's tone was final; Nikolai knew there was no point in trying to bargain with him at this point.

"Jesus, fine." Nikolai’s fate had been decided and it was now mandatory that he go to the Delta Chi party that night. And here he had been looking forward to a quiet evening alone with his guitar and journal...

"It'll be fun, you sad sack. And I really want you to meet Alina," Aleks chastised.

"I didn’t know you missed my irreplaceable company quite this much."

Aleks gently threw a pencil across the table at his head. "Maybe you'll even catch a new fish of your own, huh?" he said with an obnoxious smirk. Nikolai just chuckled, nodding noncommittally before heading off to his bedroom.

It's not that he didn’t want to go. Well, he didn’t, really. But normally, he would. It’d been about a month since he called it off with the girl he met in Statistics. And it's not like he even missed her all that much- he knew she wouldn’t be around long from the start. But he was still stuck in the “mope in his room, write songs about heartbreak” phase of his healing. Because of such, he hadn't felt like partying much lately, but he’d blown off Aleks the last 3 weekends...he wasn't going to let Nikolai say no again.

Nikolai figured the least he could do is try and look presentable. It was unlike him to spend as much time in sweats as he had; his sense of style had always been impeccable. He was a man who knew he was handsome and knew the best way to broadcast just that. He pulled out tight black jeans and paired them with a powder blue button down with the sleeves rolled up, maybe a couple of the top buttons left undone. He pushed his golden hair back out of his hazel eyes and scrutinized himself in the mirror. To his horror, he looked like he hadn't had a good night of sleep in a week, which was true. Overall, it could have been better, but it could be worse. With a sigh, he grabbed his phone and keys before going out to find Aleks.

They got to the Delta Chi house, and there were already a few guys passed out on the lawn. Nikolai wasn’t surprised, but it was only 10:30. They must have been freshmen. Aleks lead the way to the porch where a petite dark haired girl turned around and beamed at them.

"You're late!" she says with a clearly fake pout. Aleks leaned in to kiss it away and Nikolai looked everywhere but at them.

"Sorry, sorry, I know. Miss Princess here had to be dragged out of his cave," he laughed at his expense. "Alina, this is Nikolai. Nikolai, Alina."

"Nice to finally meet you," Alina smiled. She's cute, he can give Aleks that.

"I’ll have you know I was not in a cave. I was waxing poetic about love lost, heartbreak and what have you,” Nikolai smirked as Alina laughed.

"Genya and her new roommate are already inside," Alina said, grabbing Aleks's hand.

Thank god. Not that he didn't want to spend time with them or get to know Alina, but he didn't really want to watch them suck face and play third wheel all night. Genya had been a friend of theirs since Freshman year- she smoked them down at a random dorm party and she'd been part of the gang ever since. Nikolai pushed through the crowd and made it along with Aleks and Alina to the kitchen. There were fewer people back here and Nikolai felt like he could breathe again.

"Nik," Genya chirped and threw her hands up excitement. "He lives!"

"You saw me Wednesday," Nikolai laughed. “But, I understand. Aleks was desperate for his company too. It must have been unbearable without me.”

"I really didn't think Aleks would get you to come," she said with an easy grin. Genya handed him a cup of what he assumed was beer. "Doesn't matter. You're here now."

They all circled up and chatted for a minute. For once in his life, Nikolai felt like he was noticeably quiet, but he found he didn’t have much to add. They didn’t want to hear about how he managed to cook a meal TWICE last week. Or how he’d written probably a dozen songs, all of them dogshit. Genya was grinning at a story their friend William was telling when she looked over his shoulder and motioned for someone to join them.

"Guys! Guys! This is my new roommate," Genya said. Ah yes, the new roommate. How could Nikolai forget?

New Roommate had wedged themselves into the circle two people away from Nikolai. He looked up from his cup and immediately locked eyes with you. Honestly, the name should have tipped him off. He never, ever thought he’d see you again. There's no way you possibly remember him, right? God, you were still so beautiful.

"Nikolai?" you asked with a tight voice, eyes jumping all around his face. And it's right about then that Nikolai wished he got a little more beauty sleep. Here you were, practically glowing, while he looked like the walking dead.

"Hey," he breathed out. It sounded a lot more desperate than he meant it to, but you always have had that effect on him.

"You guys know each other?" Aleks interjected.

"It's uh, it's been a few years, but yeah," you said with a blush, looking down into your cup. Aleks and Genya both looked at Nikolai with a raised eyebrow. He could feel the sweat pricking along his brow. Fuck, now all eyes were on him...

"Maybe there's a spot open for beer pong. Let's go check it out." Thank you. Subtle, Genya. "You guys can catch up," Genya said walking past you and patting Nikolai on the shoulder. The rest of his friends followed suit and Nikolai was left alone with you, staring not so subtly.

You hadn’t grown an inch. You’d lost the bright red glasses too. But, god, you were still the most gorgeous creature Nikolai had ever laid his eyes on. Really, he couldn't have lost his virginity to a hotter person.

It's your typical boy-meets-girl story. Nikolai first saw you at the rink where he played hockey in high school. Your parents owned the building and seeing as such, you were employed as the kid behind the concession stand. Nikolai remembered the first time he saw you, he thought you looked like a dork. A very hot dork, but a dork all the same. Nikolai began to notice you watching him in particular during practice, which just further flustered his raging teen hormones.

One night, after everyone else had left practice, Nikolai stayed behind and introduced himself to you. He’d never seen such a beautiful mouth and he had to resist the urge to kiss you right then and there. It became habit that he stay after practice and lean against the counter to shamelessly flirt with you. You often had the rink to yourselves by that time, so Nikolai felt like he could really be himself during those hours. He was still figuring out his place in the world and had stuck-up parents who would never approve of him taking you home. But in the lowlights of the concourse, he was allowed to have a crush on you.

Flirting led to making out behind the counter. Making out behind the counter led to hand stuff in your beat up purple van once you locked up for the night. Hand stuff led to him fucking you in the locker room shower. It was both of your first time and it could have been much less hurried. But you were young and inexperienced and horny as fuck and still exploring sexuality. You kept that arrangement up for the next few months until the season ended and Nikolai left that fall for school. He felt like a dick for not saying goodbye to you. It's not in his nature to ghost. It just isn't. He thinks maybe he was still scared of what it all "meant" and how much he really liked you. Maybe this was the universe telling him to make things right with you and make things right for himself.

"Hey, stranger," you said with a lopsided grin. Fuck. Nikolai was so done for if you kept looking at him like that.

"Hey yourself." And Nikolai couldn't help himself when he reached out to you to pull you in a tight embrace. Lucky him, you didn’t push him away and call him a fucking asshole; he thought he would have deserved that. You buried your face into his neck and the hot little puffs of air were doing way more to him than they should. You parted just enough to get a good look at each other.

"You look good," you said with a dark edge to your voice, bottom lip trapped between your teeth. He knew very well what he looked like that night, but you seemed to mean the compliment.

"You look better," he replied earnestly, because it was true. It shouldn't have been this easy to fall right back into things. But it was always different with you. Sometimes, he still thought you were the only one that really understood him without him having to say a word.

"Nikolai Lantsov, you always were a little flirt," you laughed. Your eyes crinkled at the corner and Nikolai thought to himself how beautiful you are when you’re playful. You’re always beautiful. He wanted nothing more than to whisk you away and have you alone. This time, he wouldn’t fuck it up. He wouldn’t let you go. You must have noticed his brain going into overdrive because you say "What's going on up there? What ya thinking?" You pushed a rogue lock of golden hair away from his face.

"Honestly?"

"Honestly."

"I'm thinking about how much I wish we weren't at a frat party right now. I'm thinking about how I want to be selfish and have you all to myself," Nikolai said low so only you could hear. You laughed a little to yourself and looked at him with sparkling eyes.

"I'm not stopping you," you drawled. Fuck. Fuck, ok. This was really happening.

"Let me tell the guys we're leaving and then do you maybe want to get some food?" Nikolai asked hopefully. You just nodded coyly with a small smirk.

"I'll meet you out front." You squeezed his hand once and started pushing your way through the sea of bodies.

Nikolai ran his hands through his hair and took a deep breath before nearly running down to the basement, eager to say goodbye and make his way back to you. Genya, Aleks, Alina, and William were playing each other, a beer pong table stretching between their pairs.

"Where's your old friend?" Genya asked with a shit eating grin.

"We're um. We're actually gonna head out. So, I guess I'll—" but he was immediately cut off by Aleks.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Nik, are you leaving with a girl?" he teased.

"Yes. I am." Nikolai looked at him defiantly.

"How do you guys know each other anyways?" Bill asked before launching a shot.

"Just from growing up. High school or whatever," Nikolai mumbled.

"Cmon..." Genya begged.

"Wouldn’t you love to know," he said, voice laced with snark. "I just came down here to say we're fucking leaving!"

"Well then you better not keep your girl waiting," Genya said with a silent kiss in his direction. Nikolai just flipped her off and took his leave.

When he got outside, you were waiting with your hands in your pockets at the bottom of the porch steps. He smiled wide at you and offered a hand, which you seemed happy to take.

"So, are they gonna give me a bunch of shit next time I see them?" you asked as you walked hand in hand to the little strip of 24 hour restaurants on the outskirts of campus.

"Probably. Nothing you can't handle," Nikolai winked. You laughed then a little giggle. It's such a familiar sound and just like that, Nikolai was transported back to the ice rink and you giggling between kisses behind the snack bar.

You made it to one of his favorite delis in town and he offers to buy you a sandwich, which of course you tried to refuse his offer. Nikolai simply won't hear it. He had 5 years of douche baggery to make up for and insisted. You finally conceded and thanked him with the sweetest smile Nikolai had ever seen. You found a table in the corner, away from the door and prying eyes.

"So, how'd you meet Genya?" Nikolai asked.

"We have a writing class together. And we got to talking and became friends. I needed to find a new place cause my old roommate had to drop out and move home. I couldn't afford the place on my own. And I mean, you know how Genya is," you laughed, "I told her all about it one day in class and she offered me a room at her place without batting an eye."

"That does sound like Genya," Nikolai nodded.

"I've only been there like, two hours. But it's been good so far. Genya's been super cool," you said with a smile.

"I can't believe that we've been at the same school this whole time and it's taken this long to find each other," Nikolai said, mostly to himself, but you heard him and reached across the table to grab one of his hands.

"But we did find each other eventually, yeah?" You ran your thumb over his knuckle.

"Yeah," he said, suddenly bashful. Nikolai was seldom flustered. He had nerves of steel and had confidence to spare on his worst days. But you. You cut through him, all the way down to the core, and that made him nervous.

"So," you started, "Tell me about everything Nikolai Lantsov. Surely you've been up to something the last few years."

"Not much interesting to tell," he shrugged. "Been studying history. Writing music here and there to keep myself occupied."

"Girlfriend?"

"Who wants to know?" he asked with an arched eyebrow.

"Shut up," you mumbled into your soda. He doesn't miss the blush that's spreading over your cheeks.

"No. No girlfriend." he paused, considering how honest to be. But fuck it, he owed you candor. "I actually broke up with a girl a little over a month ago." You looked back up at him then, your eyes searching presumably for whether or not Nikolai was still torn up about it. "She wasn’t...she wasn’t right for mw and I guess I was just done. I feel like I should still be sad about it or whatever, but I'm not. I don't miss her. The wallowing and self reflection has been great writing fodder though," he said with a laugh.

"I'm sorry, Nik. You don't deserve that."

"Don't I?" Nikolai looked at you and suddenly felt torn open. "I...I'll never forgive myself for what I did to you." You bit down on your lip and looked out the window. "I regretted leaving you, god, and like a fucking asshole. I regretted leaving you so much. I know saying I'm sorry isn't even close to enough. But god, I'm so fucking sorry." He knew there were tears threatening to fall from his eyes, but he swallowed them down best he could.

"I'm not going to act like it didn't hurt me. Because it really, really did. But I accept your apology, Nik. You know I could never stay mad at you." You paused for a minute before looking at Nikolai with a tiny fire in your eyes. "You know, I'm pretty sure I was in love with you back then."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I don’t think I ever stopped loving you," He said confidently. Your jaw dropped just for a moment before you're giving him that sexy grin that apparently still drives him absolutely crazy.

"Still?” Nikolai just smirked. "What if you don't know me anymore?" you asked and sucked at the straw in your soda.

"I'd like to." There's a shift in the air between you. Nikolai was sure you could both feel it. It was suddenly too warm in the restaurant and there's too much table separating you. He decided to take his chance. “How do you feel about going back to my place?”

You suddenly seemed very interested in your nail beds, picking anxiously at the skin. “You didn’t ask me if I was seeing anyone.”

Nikolai stalled. He didn’t. You asked about his relationship status and he was so absorbed with letting you know that he was, in fact, single, that he didn’t bother to ask if you were even available. Hadn't you been flirting all night? He'd certainly been flirting. But like you said, maybe he didn't know you anymore. Maybe this was just how you were these days. “Are you...are you seeing someone?”

“Yeah,” you sighed. Maybe it was his own wishful thinking, him hearing the resignation in your voice. Not that he wanted you to be unhappy. No, you deserved the world and he wanted nothing more than for you to have the sun and the moon and the stars. But, maybe there was still a chance for him yet. “His name is Matt. We’ve been together for like, a year or so.”

“Matt.” He let the name burn his tongue. “You love him?”

“Nik…” you warned.

“Just a question.”

“It’s more complicated than that.”

“Just my two cents here,” Nikolai started, leaning back into the booth, “But you deserve to be with someone you can gush about. Someone who when you get asked if you love them, you don’t think twice and say ‘they’re the love of my life!’”

“And you don’t think that’s him?” you said, huffing. “You think that’s you?”

“There’s a chance,” he smirked. “All that aside, I’m very glad fate has brought us together again.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you laughed. “I missed you too.” You looked at your phone quickly. “Shit, I should get going. I have a shift at 9 tomorrow.”

“Let me walk you home,” Nikolai insisted, standing from the booth and helping you into your jacket.

“Always such a gentleman,” you smiled, tapping him gently on the nose before walking ahead of him.

The walk to your and Genya’s place felt too short. Nikolai had made this trek, both intoxicated and sober, and it always seemed much longer. But now he was at your front door, hands shoved in his pockets as he shifted his weight from foot to foot. “If you don’t want to hang out again, I understand, but I need you to tell me now if you think it’s a bad idea,” he rushed out.

“Of course I want to see you again,” you said, rolling your eyes. “So dramatic. We can still be friends, right?”

“We can be best friends,” he smiled.

“I’m glad I ran into you tonight.”

“Likewise.”

You were both clearly just trying to prolong the evening at this point. Nikolai took it upon himself to put you both out of your misery and pulled you into his arms again. You gripped his torso tightly, melting your body against his. He held you close, both strong arms wrapped around your shoulder while he tucked your head under his chin. After a moment, he pulled back enough to leave a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“Get some sleep,” he whispered, his breathing a little hard.

“Ok,” you croaked, nodding. Nikolai stepped out of your space then, squeezing your hand one last time before walking back out to the sidewalk, waiting and watching to make sure you got inside safely.

#nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x reader #prince nikolai #shadow and bone #grishaverse #nikolai lantsov fanfic #shadow and bone fanfic #nikolai lantsov au #shadow and bone au #grishaverse au #ootw #masterlist

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ilalos · 3 years ago

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Lavender dreams (Anthony Bridgerton x OC)-Part 1/3

Word count: 3.1k

Anthony stormed into his office after breakfast with his mother following close. The proper introductions were made when Miss Grace, or Gigi as she preferred to be called, entered the dining room; he had ignored the little somersault that attacked his heart when he made eye contact with the young girl and instead of acknowledging the feeling chose to finish eating as soon as humanly possible and left the table in a haste.

“How could you not notify me of this visit mother? The responsibility of finding her a suitable match falls on me and I know nothing about this girl, do you?” he tried to keep his voice down, but the exasperation he felt still showed in the form of harsh whispers.

“I didn’t tell you because I know she won’t have a problem finding a suitor that would be interested in her” Violet sat down tiredly looking at her exasperated son.

“And how are you so sure of that?”

“Well, she is an only daughter to a wealthy man, she is a well-read young woman and an amazing piano player, not to mention her dowry is obviously substantial” she gave him a pointed ‘I told you so’ glare “and of course, she is beautiful”

“Even worst then, we’ll have to make sure that whoever marries her-“

“We won’t do anything but I’ll make sure she loves the man she chooses to marry and he does her, that was Rose’s wish and that’s what I’ll do” she stood up not wanting to hear any more of her son’s antics.

Meanwhile, in the drawing-room things seemed to be running smoothly as Gigi read a novel and Eloise sat next to her reading the latest Lady Whistledown, while Benedict draws the pair in his sketchbook.

“Ugh! I can’t believe tomorrow is the day where our whole future is defined by the judgment of the queen” Eloise couldn’t keep her discontent in after reading the suppositions of who could be this season’s Incomparable “Can you believe it? Tomorrow our settling down begins” she sighed dramatically.

“Stop scaring the girl, Eloise” Benedict chastised with a smile, not looking up from his sketch.

“It’s not like I have a choice on the matter, so I try not to worry too much about it” Gigi gave her a small smile as if trying to comfort her.

“Right?! Society makes us feel like we have no choice, we either settle for a boring man who will hopefully be interesting enough to-“

“I don’t think she meant that she is pressured by society, dear sister” chuckled Benedict

“Oh, then pray tell me what you meant Grace”

“My father is very ill” started Gigi with a sad look as she let the book fall on her lap “I’m his only daughter and he wishes to see me married and in love before his passing”

Silence filled the room after Gigi finished speaking, she picked her book back up and resumed her reading when Eloise’s voice suddenly cut through the quiet atmosphere.

“You could marry one of my brothers, you know?” She said it more as thought said out loud than an actual suggestion and it caused Benedict to loudly scratch his pencil against the paper of his drawing.

“I don’t think that would be a wise suggestion sister” he racked his brain trying to come up with a way to explain how adamant he was on NOT getting married anytime soon “I for one wouldn’t want to be the brother in question, no offense Gigi”

“None taken” she giggled “I understand where you’re coming from Eloise but neither of your brothers seems prepared, or willing, to get married this season”

“Well it’s your loss, these dimwits may not look like much but they are somewhat intelligent and also very desirable matches according to Lady Whistledown”

“Well isn’t this a warm welcome?” Colin's voice startled the siblings and their guest as they didn’t expect him to arrive for another month.

Benedict was the first to stand and embrace his brother while his sister seemed to be torn between welcoming Colin and running to the Featherington’s residency to notify her best friend of his arrival, she knew Penelope would appreciate learning the news before the whole ton started whispering about it or even worse reading about it the next day. Standing up she chose to run to her friend’s home and also drag her guest along to not leave her alone with her brothers who were already deep in conversation.

“Tell mother we will be back for lunch!” She ran to the door with an iron grip around Gigi’s wrist only stopping to give a quick “Welcome home brother!”

“It was lovely to meet you!” That was all Gigi managed to get out before being dragged through the streets of London towards the Featherington home.

/////Time jump\\\\\

The picnic had gone wonderfully and Violet could not have been happier, surrounded by all her children and one grandchild. For a moment she forgot the expectations, the pressure of the next day’s events that signified the start of a new season that would, hopefully, be less dramatic than the last.

The men chatted about Colin’s travels as all the older men had already taken the same voyages, in way less innocent intents than him (read: brothel tour) as he seemed truly interested in the culture, the sights, and the history of the places he visited. Of course, he had met many women on his travels and he had laid with some of them but of that, he wouldn’t speak in such proximity to his mother and sisters.

Later that evening the girls had gone to pick up their debut dresses accompanied by the duchess to get as much advice as possible in how to be the Incomparable of the season, Daphne truly didn’t know how she had achieved that and if she had to be completely honest she only went to spend some time with her sister.

When the girls arrived back at the Bridgerton home, Violet decided it would be early supper and early bedtime for everyone because tomorrow was a crucial day for everyone’s life. Lady Bridgerton knew she couldn’t control what her sons would get up to in the late-night but she would make sure that her debutants were well rested before their presentation to the queen, and she made sure of it by personally escorting them to their shared room and verifying they had in fact gone to bed.

Way past the middle of the night Gigi woke up with a start after having a nightmare about her mother’s death, tears were running down her cheeks and her heart was hammering inside her chest so fast it was almost painful. She quickly looked to Eloise’s sleeping form and breathed a sigh of relief when she confirmed that the girl had not been awakened by her. Slowly and quietly Gigi got up from the bed and grabbed her robe, she needed some fresh air to calm down and maybe some milk.

Little tears were still falling from her eyes as she walked to the kitchen but the hammering of her heart had subsided by now, as she passed the office she noticed light coming from the room and with a frown, she went to see who was there at this ungodly hour. It was Anthony who was hunched over his desk holding an almost empty cup of liquor, his other hand supporting his head and messing his once perfectly combed hair, he was looking at some papers that were carelessly thrown over the desk surface with a deep frown.

“Lord Bridgerton is everything okay?” she knew she should’ve just continued her path to the kitchen but seeing him so concerned made her feel a dull ache in her chest.

He was startled by her voice, almost dropping his cup and lifting his head so quickly he got a little dizzy. He took a good look at her and realized a couple of things: first, she had been crying, and second, even in the simplest of robes with dried tears on her cheeks she looked breathtakingly beautiful.

“Miss Gillingham what are you doing awake at this hour?”

“I could ask you the same thing” she hadn’t meant to sound so sassy but her sleepy brain couldn’t process much formality at the moment.

“It’s nothing that concerns you” he said it with no intention of being harsh but her small wince let him know it came out that way “may I ask you, where were you heading to before stumbling into my office?”

“I was on my way to the kitchen to heat some milk, couldn’t sleep”

“I could help you with that” he surprised even himself with the suggestion because he knew he couldn’t even turn on the stove “stay here, I’ll go to the kitchen, it’s no place for a barefoot lady to be in”

She blushed and looked down at her feet that were in fact bare. He got up from his desk and walked up to where she was standing by the door, he gently pulled her inside the room and guided her to sit on the couch, silently instructing her to stay there before taking his leave for the kitchen. After he left she decided it would be nice of her to refill his drink, she grabbed the liquor bottle that sat atop one of the many papers on the desk and poured it in the cup. She knew she shouldn’t be reading what was written on the papers but her eyes couldn’t help but wander around the surface and soon realized what troubled Anthony, someone was stealing from the family.

“You didn’t need to do that, I could’ve poured it myself” she jumped a little when she heard his voice.

“Nonsense, you went into the trouble of getting me...cold? Milk” she had one look at the small glass bottle he held in his hand with a small smile.

“Ah yes” he chuckled “I didn’t want to bother a kitchen maid so cold milk it is”

“I appreciate the gesture Lord Bridgerton” she took the bottle from his hands as he approached her “I understand you not wanting to wake any of the kitchen staff as one of them is clearly stealing from you”

“What are you talking about? Such accusations are not to be said in such a lightly manner”

“I apologize, sir, I didn’t mean to anger you” she looked down at her feet and tears welled her eyes once again.

“What makes you think one of our kitchen staff is stealing from us?” He was genuinely curious about her answer, not sure if he’d believe it but nonetheless curious.

“Here” she pointed to a piece of paper and his breath hitched at her proximity “it says that you bought 50 baguettes from the bakery today”

“Yes, what about it?”

“Well I saw your table this morning and there were no baguettes there, in the picnic he had croissants and for dinner, there were, again, no baguettes” she felt proud of the way he looked down at her in what could only be described as awe “Baguette is a bread that must be eaten within the same day it is bought as it will get stale rather quickly, it is also an incredible amount of bread for a relatively small family to eat” she completed her explanation and stepped back to give him room to see it for himself.

“I believe you are correct but I must know, how did you know this?” All Anthony could think about was how wonderful it would be to have a wife that could understand such concepts of family economy.

“The same thing happened at our state a couple of years back, our housekeeper claimed to buy enormous quantities of food to get the extra coin herself”

“Who caught her?”

“My mom” she smiled “She said men would’ve never noticed because they had no idea how a kitchen works, she did and she taught me that being a good wife meant not only raising the children but also making sure everything in the home is working how it's supposed to, among other things”

“She sounds like a wonderful woman” he wanted to embrace her with how small and sad she looked but he refrained from doing so, it would be highly inappropriate.

“She was” a yawn tore through her and she suddenly realized just how tired she was “Well good night Lord Bridgerton, thank you for the milk”

He took the vessel from her hand, set it gently on the table, and offered his arm to accompany her to the door.

“Goodnight to you too, and please call me Anthony”

She looked up at him one last time before turning and padding to her bedroom as quietly as she could. Meanwhile, Anthony sat back at his desk and chuckled in disbelief, he had spent the past three hours trying to know where the sudden increase of expenses had come from and she had solved it after mere seconds of looking, she truly was a wonderful woman and would be an even better wife. He couldn’t help but think for a brief moment that she could perhaps be a wonderful wife for him.

Morning came quicker than expected and the house was filled with running maids preparing baths, horses being brushed, and food being made. Anthony fired their housekeeper, Violet wanted to kill him as he chose to do so at the worst possible time and that forced her to make her personal maid the housekeeper to keep things running smoothly on such an important date. The girls came down with their hair done wearing robes so they could eat before getting dressed, Violet didn’t want them to spill anything on them but most importantly she didn’t want to have either of the girls fainting in front of the queen due to hunger, so breakfast in a robe was the solution.

Disaster hit Lady Bridgerton’s mind as soon as she saw the way her firstborn looked at Grace, he looked at her as if he was in love with her. She had no problem in her son choosing to court the young heiress but it would look terrible if he were to court her while she was staying in their home, it would certainly give the wrong impression. She rose from the table and grabbed her eldest daughter by the elbow prompting her to follow her out to the hallway where she proceeded to explain that she needed her and her husband to take Grace to Lady Dunbury’s house.

“But why? Is our presence bothering you mother?”

“Of course not dearest, but I must get Grace out of the house to avoid a scandal” at her daughter’s confused face she continued “your brother seems to fancy her and I’m afraid if he chose to court her it would look terrible if she was to be living under the same roof as him”

Daphne understood her mother’s reasoning and agreed that it would be quite scandalous for a debutant to live in the same home as the man who courted her. Back in the dining room, the Duke of Hastings was getting worried by his wife’s absence so he ventured into the hallway to find her and her mother speaking in hushed voices.

“My love! I was just about to send for you” Daphne reached her hand out to her husband and he took it with a wary look “My mother has asked us to take over Grace’s season at Lady Danbury’s house, and I wanted to know if that may be possible”

He wanted to say no, he wanted to avoid staying the whole season under the scrutiny of the ton and also that of Lady Danbury, but he couldn’t deny his wife the chance to spend this time close to her family and for her to take such responsibility was a task he knew she wished to do to make her mother proud. So despite wanting to deny such request he smiled and instead said he’d be honored to help her with such task and would make arrangements to speak with Lady Danbury and send their belongings there while they went to de debutants presentation.

The presentation to the queen goes uneventful until Eloise walks in accompanied by her mother, even though she failed to aid in catching Lady Whistledown The Queen admired the young lady and provided her with a nod of approval, which was an enormous statement coming from the monarch. Next walked in Grace with Daphne and to no one’s surprise, she was deemed the Incomparable by the queen with a simple kiss to the forehead.

The news traveled fast and as soon as both ladies arrived at the ball in Lady Danbury’s home their dancing cards were filled with prospects, well Grace’s was because thanks to Anthony’s ‘assistance’ Eloise’s was impossibly blank. Daphne and Simon had decided to allow Gigi to dance with whoever she liked and they would worry about background checks when the dances turned into gentleman callers.

Anthony spent half of his attention taking good care of his sister and the other half was put into painfully watching Gigi dancing with different men, but what hurt the most was seeing that the man that made her smile the most was his own brother. He watched Colin take her first dance and couldn’t help the jealousy coursing through his veins as he saw them smiling and laughing as he twirled her around the dance floor. Perhaps that jealousy is what prompted him to abandon his sister’s side and approach the purple-eyed girl to ask for a dance.

“I’m so sorry Anthony but my dance card is full for the night” she was truly apologetic even though she had no way of knowing the eldest Bridgerton would want her to save a dance for him.

“May I see it?” He read through the list of names and chose to scratch over Benedict’s name knowing his brother had saved himself a dance with the girl only to save her from another dance with an impossibly boring gentleman, so he wouldn’t mind giving his dance up to his older brother.

“Is that allowed?” She asked with a smile.

“It is when he’s your brother” he dropped the card and handed back her pencil “Do me a favor and save me a dance on the next ball, and all others after that” with a final smile he left her to dance with the next gentleman and went back to his sister’s side.

Part 2

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

I wanted to write this in 1 part buuuuut it came out longer than expected 😬 It’ll probably be like a 3-4 part story. If you took the time to read this I appreciate you :):):):):):):):):)

#bridgerton #bridgerton imagine #anthony bridgerton x oc #anthony bridgerton #anthony bridgerton imagine #my writing

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rhenuvee · 4 years ago

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The Heart in You pt2 (Fred Weasley x reader)

Request: Could you do something along these lines? Love you soo much <3 your imagines make me happier. It would mean the world to me if you could do this!! Request: Could you write a Fred Weasley imagine where the reader is Fred's best friend but they never really show affection, they insult each other all the time and occasionally Fred flirts, teasingly. But Fred gets all nervous and goes soft when y/n is visiting their home since its so small and you know.. they're poor and stuff... thanks <3

Link to pt1: Here

--------------------------------------------------

You were peacefully walking through the corridors, ready to spend a cozy Sunday afternoon being warm from the cold with your friends. It was quite surprising how little disturbance there was, as if you were in a scene in a movie.

That is, until you heard the sudden roars of laughter, clapping, and awe. You gritted your teeth- you knew that the peace was too good to be true. You decided to change your direction, hoping that this path would bring an end to this once and for all.

This was something you’ve been dealing with for the past week, and it’s been pissing you off. You found the source of the crowd of noise, seeing that it was coming from out in the courtyard. It was just as you expected.

“-and then there I was, cornered! Like a poor gazelle standing out in the open!” narrated a voice you knew too well. You stood watching from a distance with your arms folded, seeing as a specific redhead told a story you almost knew by heart by now.

Just as rehearsed for the past seven days a week, you saw the same dramatic gestures by none other than Fred Weasley. His stupid chocolate brown eyes which you couldn’t bother to look at, his stupid smile which you swore he had on 24/7- Although you had to admit, something even more stupid was the first and second years genuinely interested and believing in his anecdote.

“I almost died, but I stayed strong!” you facepalmed as he scrunched up his face way too dramatically. “She- the lion, sneaking up, ready to jump out and-”

“WEASLEY!” you yelled interrupting him, hearing enough of his crap. It seemed to scare some of the first and second years as they jumped and turned to see you.

“It’s the lion! Run!” shouted Fred. The kids yelled their lungs out and ran in all different directions all to get away from ‘the lion’. You marched your way to Fred, trudging your way towards him. You didn’t care about your shoes getting wet from the snow, all you cared about was slapping that smirk off his face.

“Yes?” he said rather casually from his spot, leaning against the wall.

“Yes? That’s all you have to say to the ferocious lion?” you asked incredulously. He chuckled.

“Actually, I do have something to say, though we may need a spell to translate between your roaring.” You scoffed at his terrible joke.

“I hate you.”

“We know that’s a lie, love.” You rolled your eyes. You knew that the reason the story started in the first place was because of that day you asked him to the yule ball. He tricked you, and his ego was just getting bigger.

“And what makes you think that?” you retorted.

“You’re the one who asked me to the ball, love.” he said scoffing. You mentally slapped yourself for having a question with an obvious answer. The term of endearment definitely didn’t help in trying to hide your embarrassment.

“I was drunk.” you replied quickly. Fred in turn laughed at your quick statement, causing you to laugh a little.

“Really? Then you should get drunk more often.”

“I think you’re drunk, gazelle.” you said poking his chest then turning to leave. Though, this didn’t stop him from hopping from his place and catching up with you.

“Am I now?” he asked pressing further.

“Yes Fred, bye.” you said as you were about to leave him and turn a corner.

“Alright, don’t miss me too much darling!”

“Fred!”

---

“Hey (y/n)!” called someone from behind you. You stopped and turned to see George who was slowing down to stop near your spot.

“Hey George. What’s going on?”

“Are you doing anything this holiday?” he asked.

“Hm, probably just gonna go home for the break, same as every year... why?”

“I was wondering if you’d like to come to ours for Christmas.” Your eyes widened at his offer. You had never been to the burrow before.

“You don’t have to, but I know it would make a certain gazelle really happy.” he teased. You rolled your eyes.

“If it would make him happy, why couldn’t he ask me himself?”

“Well riddle me this, would a gazelle purposely perch itself out in the open where any predator- ow!” You playfully punched George in the arm, seeing as the story was starting to rub on him.

“Sorry- what I meant to say was, it would also make myself, Ginny and Ron really happy. You’re our best friend (y/n)... also, mum’s been asking for you as well.”

“Your mum? Asking about me?” you said shocked.

“You’ve been mentioned here and there.” he said casually. You bit your lip, trying to supress a smile. You were invited to the burrow, which you’ve heard only good things from Harry and Hermione.

“Alright, I’ll send an owl to my parents and ask them.” you said. He nodded with a grin, knowing his twin would be ecstatic to hear this.

---

Your parents were a little surprised that you were going to spend the holidays at the burrow. They’ve never met the twins, just like how Arthur and Molly only heard a few things about you. Nonetheless, they were glad to see you so happy to be with your friends. On another note, you were very very nervous. Maybe it was because of seeing the rest of the Weasley family, but also for very stupid reasons.

“Oh (y/n), it’s so good to finally meet you dear! Come inside now!” You were welcomed by Molly herself, engulfing you in a tight and warm hug. You smiled, instantly relieved that Molly liked you enough to hug you.

“I’ve heard so many things about you.” she said maintaining a bright smile.

“And I’ve heard that you heard many things, all good I hope.” you said.

“Only the best.” she said swiping your cheek then turning to lead you deeper into the house. You walked in, and your eyes couldn’t help put to move left and right.

“(Y/n)!” You then saw Ginny appear, running as fast as she could down the stairs, then jumping and hugging you just like her mother did. You both squealed in excitement.

“Hey idiots! Your favourite person is here!” Ginny yelled calling for the twins.

“Ginny!” scolded Molly with her arms crossed. You giggled. You watched as the two tall figures stepped down to where you were.

“Well look who it is.” George said smirking and leaning in for a hug. Once you pulled away, you saw Fred, but you couldn’t help but notice something was weird about him.

“Hi.” he said curtly, but with a small smile.

“Hey...?” you greeted, letting your confusion be slightly present. He also went in for a hug, though it was a lot lighter than the ones you’ve received so far.

“Do you want any food?” asked Fred.

“Um sure.” you shrugged. You thought it was a little strange that Fred was being so ‘nice’ to you. I mean, like George said, would a gazelle let itself stand in the open and offer food for a predator? But you decided to brush the thought off, besides, you really ought to get that dumb story out of your head.

The first evening with the Weasley’s went well. You were able to meet the rest of the family as well as Harry and Hermione which you realized later that they were here. Molly’s cooking was delicious, and you were glad to be apart of the holiday gathering. You were glad that everyone was willing to welcome you, despite being new to the burrow.

It wasn’t until a couple hours after dinner, when it was late and you spotted Fred and George sitting on the couch, fiddling with what you expected was some of their future joke shop products.

“Hey.” you said heading over to sit with them. George smiled, then quickly jumped up to leave.

“I gotta go to the bathroom. See ya!” he said a bit too joyfully. I mean- tis the season, but one could not be that excited to go to the bathroom. You then scooched closer to Fred, and he noticed with a small grin.

“Hey you.” he said bringing his lanky arm to wrap around you and bring you even closer. You blushed at the extremely close proximity between you two, but if you were being honest, you didn’t mind one bit. This was secretly what you wanted, right?

You remembered the day you asked Fred to the yule ball quite clearly. After that incident, he was a huge ball of chaos and energy. You remember him skipping down halls, and how you had to chase him to shut up when he started the gazelle story.

And when the night of the ball finally arrived, you were a big bundle of nerves- and Fred was being a cocky little shit as usual... but aside from that, there were things he did that made you have the most fun you’ve ever had in your life. You didn’t forget how much he made you laugh and smile that night.

And now, you let the thought of his silence creep over again. He spoke and cracked jokes during dinner, but he was still quieter than you’ve experienced. You sat in the same silence as he seemed to be fixing a product.

“Fred...?” you said looking at him, a little surprised that your faces were closer than you expected.

“Hm?”

“Uh, are you okay?” you asked. You tried to ask it in the most subtle way possible. He only looked at you with an unreadable expression. The weirdest thing being that he had no witty comeback, or any line to start your typical banter.

“Yeah.” he said giving a closed mouthed smile again, then looking back at the joke products. Jeez, why did boys have to be so hard to read? To you at least.

“I just, ‘m surprised you accepted when George invited you here.” he muttered, but you heard it loud and clear.

“And why would you be surprised?” You didn’t know what to feel. His head pointed downwards- suddenly this moment felt really familiar. You were a bit skeptical if you were being truthful. After a long pause, he suddenly chuckled awkwardly to himself and sat up, leaned back until his head was tilted back on the top edge of the couch.

“I’m mad for you.” he said shifting himself so that his head was still tilted back but facing you. All your jumbling thoughts couldn’t force itself out of your mouth. You just sat there, your eyes bulging out of your head, and mouth in an o shape.

“W-what?” you managed to say. Now you were very very skeptical of what was to happen. You do not want to be tricked by him again, and leave you a blushing mess.

“I’m mad for you- do you need me to spell it out?” he asked. With the dim lighting you couldn’t see the slight flush of red on his cheeks. He brought his hand to cover his eyes, still showing his lips which were curved up in a flustered smile.

“I- are you being serious?” you asked in confirmation.

“Am I- yes I am (y/n), I’m mad for you. I said it three times, now you gotta believe me.” he said taking away the hand covering his face. You didn’t even try to hide the pink tinting your face. You shook your head, not knowing what to say.

“You still don’t believe me do you.” he deadpanned. You didn’t answer to that. He chuckled, already knowing your answer. In one swift motion, he cupped your cheek with his hand and brought you in closer for a kiss. You closed your eyes as his lips pressed against and moved in sync with yours.

You moved so that you were able to put both your hands on his shoulders to bring him closer. You could feel the hum from his lips when he heard you let out a little noise. Both of you were speechless blushing messes once you pulled away with the ‘smooch’ sound.

“Believe me now?” he said in almost a whisper. You nodded frantically, earning a smirk from Fred, as well as a beckoning gesture to ask you to cuddle next to him. You followed, snuggling up to his side, resting your head on his shoulder.

...

“I always knew you had a heart in you.”

...

“Excuse me?”

You tried burying your head further inwards, as you attempted to stifle your giggles about to erupt. Yes, you really did just pull that card on Fred Weasley.

“What did you just say?” asked Fred ducking his head to your level, trying to get a glimpse of what he hoped did not just come out of your mouth.

“Nothing!”

“You did not say nothing, princess.” he said trying to pry your hands clutching your face as you finally gave in and let out your laughter. You made the split second decision to bolt out of the living room and into the dining room to run away. Fred of course had no problem running after you.

You were both giggly as heck as you both circled the dining table, which happened to be the only thing protecting you.

“Take it back!’

“No!”

And once you said that, he made a dash for the tight corner and was able to capture you from behind. You squirmed with your legs kicking out as he held you tightly and swung you in a circle.

“Take it back!” he said in your ear.

“I won’t! This is what you get Weasley.”

“What I get? For what?”

“For...-” You realized then that if you said the reason, he would know that he was the reason you got flustered in the first place.

“What? Am I too handsome for you?” he asked as he placed you down, but still pinned you to the counter.

“In your dreams!”

“And in real life too.”

“Ugh, you’re so annoying.” you huffed crossing your arms. However, your attempt at trying not to smile failed horribly when you turned your head away from him.

“That means I won, princess.” he said smirking and tilting your head back to face him.

“Oh shut up Fred, you-”

“Make me shut up-”

“Whoa whoa whoa!” You and Fred both jumped when you saw George and Ginny intrude. And worse, when you were both getting riled up at each other.

“There will be no ‘make me shut up’ in this house.” said George mockingly as Ginny stood next to him laughing. You deadpanned at Ginny clearly not helping the situation.

“You’re not going to encourage them? It’s about time.” said Ginny.

“Gin, if you knew me, you’d know that I’m not even surprised.” replied George sarcastically.

“Oh sod off, both of you. Bein’ two creeps.” said Fred shooing them away. George and Ginny gave each other a knowing look and did as told. Fred then immediately turned back to focusing on you.

“So, what were you thinking on making me shut up?”

#fred weasley #weasley twins #fred and george #Fred Weasley x reader #Fred Weasley fluff #Fred Weasley imagine #fred weasley oneshot #fred weasley one shot

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kuroi-kotoba · 4 years ago

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SNK SPOILERS BELOW, MY THOUGHTS IN A WRAP-UP. It’s long and messy but I can’t help myself.

- first, I should say that I’m not EM shipper, however I’m definitely not an anti and I’m not oblivious to their bond. Interpret however you want, but only someone blind would refuse to see how much they mean to each other. I enjoy it in a platonic way. i hold EMA close to my heart

- this chapter is from Mikasa’s pov while 137 was centered around Armin

- the ‘thing’ happens. something people refered to as AU, a dream, a delusion. HOWEVER. this is NOT a delusion. it even goes back to the first chapter, where Eren said the same words, had the same ‘dream’. I agree that her headaches must have been connected to it. is Eren the one now showing it to her? it’s not clear

- and here is how I disagree that the ‘thing’ is an AU. it’s difficult to find words for it, but here is what I’m basing it on:

Mikasa wonders if that one day when Eren aksed her a question, her answer could have changed anything. perhaps. perhaps not. in my opinion, not to the extremum we’re seeing, the total opposite of what is happening.

Eren is out of character. i saw people saying that he would abandon everything if she just said so, but is it who he is? it looks to me as a sort of ‘what if’, a ‘possibility’, not definite other path. i can’t put a word to it. I love interpreting eren’s character and this page doesn’t sit right with me, and i don’t care about shipping, we shouldn’t reduce it just to it. it would upset me if yams truly believed this is who eren is after all he put him through. maybe it’s something mikasa would want (since we see it from her pov), a life with him.

1. ‘we abandoned everything and ran away like this’ - are you telling me that this boy who never backed down since he was a child, ran away from everything? from the sacrificed lives for his sake to reach this point? eren also showed zeke their father’s memories, and how eren was born this way, always a fighter

2. ‘I made Historia live through hell’ - after trying to protect her from breeding her like an animal? after saying he won’t sacrifice her? once again, set every ship aside, eren cared about his friends and historia was one of them

remember this page?

3. ‘Armin is probably looking for us’ - ARE YOU TELLING ME. THAT EREN. LEFT ARMIN BEHIND? it has always been EMA. armin is his best friend, his family

this is not eren. I agree, that maybe he longed for something simple like that, but he would not abandon everyone and everything because mikasa wanted to live with him, ‘just the two of them’. and if we can call it a ‘what if’, it makes sense for a character to be ooc. even his hair is short. it’s like mikasa remembers this younger eren, not what has become of him.

ABOUT FUTURE:

here, remember this?

the moment that changed eren forever when he saw the memories of his older self. the future full of destruction and what was coming

did he accept it immediately?

in his head, seems as if he still had a spark of hope, because ‘everything is still ahead’

here’s how he was coming to terms with what he saw, it was the last time his mind wasn’t fully made up, before he became ‘the devil’. it makes sense that Mikasa’s answer could have give more possibilities while his head was still a bit messy, but truly, could it? eren saw where he landed in the future, meaning his future self received the same answer from her since nothing changed. can someone really change the future or escape from it? eren fell in the steps of his older self, wanting it or not. it’s truly tragic how there seemed to be no other way, no easy path for him. if he chose to run away, he would still hate himself, he’d detest leaving his people, either way, there’s no happy ending for him.

it’s before the talk between him and mikasa happened. are you telling me he’s not determined here to fight for paradis? even if you see his feelings for her as romantic or not, family or not, he'd not run away from reality. he was chasing freedom his entire life

and here’s his conclusion. i believe it was meant to happen. we often question our past decisions, wonder if things could have gone the other way, and that’s what mikasa does. as sad as it is, I believe it was supposed to go like that, it’s truly tragic

- eren pushed away people he loves for their sake. but mikasa refused. i disagree that isayama ‘destroyed’ her character. no, she finally faced her feelings and chose to remember. but she’s not selfish, and she comes to terms that eren has to die

- here’s a bit from my other theory: i think eren became the devil for the world to unite and take him down. this way, the hatred could end. if he saw his future memories... he must have saw his death. we still don’t know his pov and I hope the last chapter is for him, but it makes so much sense. before mikasa beheads him, he looks at her as if he knew it was coming, as if he accepted it.

- maybe eren could never reach freedom, but maybe he wanted to give it to others

this is my take. once again, to say it in short, I don’t think ‘the thing’ is an AU since it presents eren in a very ooc way. i’m not looking though shipping but at the story as a whole. it saddens me that people fight over it, I’m talking about opposite sides since there are always people acting ‘extra’. no, it’s not just aww fanon shipping and screw eren’s character. no, mikasa is not destroyed and the kiss was NOT nec//rophilia, do people know the meaning of this word?? it was a goodbye kiss. she said her goodbye. this chapter is heartbreaking

all that’s left is waiting for 139 and clarifications.i hope yams doesn’t do some revival bulls/hit... as much as i love eren, it wouldn’t fit... i stand by my opinion and I’m open for discussion. pardon all mistakes and now brb, let me continue crying, because i will never be over eren.

#snk 138 #snk spoilers #aot 138 #shingeki no kyojin #snk #attack on titan #aot #mikasa ackerman #eren yeager #eren jeager #snk analysis #help #im so sad #mine

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a-bang-for-your-bucky · 4 years ago

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Welcome Home (part two)

(not my gif)

Summary: After not speaking to her brothers for over a year, Peyton Rhodes’ life is turned upside down when her boyfriend of four years cheats on her. She uproots her life with WWE and returns home to Atlanta. She finds herself among great friends and she is finding herself again after being lost for so long.

Pairings: Cody Rhodes x OFC (Sister), Brandi Rhodes x OFC (sister), Dustin Rhodes x OFC (Sister), past Seth Rollins x OFC, future Kenny Omega x OFC (maybe?), MJFx OFC( maybe?)

WARNINGS: SO MUCH FLUFFING FLUFF, explicit language, mentioned cheating (ONE EXPLICIT DESCRIPTION),

A/N: I tried to post this yesterday, but tumblr was not having it. Here is part two. Enjoy<3

Seth mentioned that WWE was traveling through Atlanta and wanted to know if he could stop by my place. I had gotten an apartment close to Brandi and Cody’s place not long after leaving. I said sure, but I was going to have someone here with me. I invited Kenny over and told him Seth wanted to talk and that I wanted, no needed, him to be there with me.

A knock at my door pulled me from my thoughts. Gathering myself together, I answered the door.

“Hey Princess.” Kenny Omega greeted me. I didn’t reply, I only embraced him. “You gonna invite me in?” he chuckled, hugging me tightly. I nodded against his broad chest. We released each other and moved into the apartment.

“Hey Ken.” I finally greeted him as the door closed. He smiled lightly. He knew I was still hurting.

“How are you?” He asked, sitting down on my couch. I shrugged, taking place next to him.

“Honestly, I feel worthless. Ken, I can’t explain it. I don't understand how he can still have this affect on me.” I said, no real emotion in my voice.

“Peyton Rhodes, you are not worthless.” Kenny rebutted, shocked at my words. “You are wrestling royalty. You are talented. And honest to God, you have Kenny Omega,” He paused to point to himself, “wrapped around your pretty little finger.” He explained, grabbing my hands. “Pey, you are my best friend. You are amazing and I hate to see you think otherwise. I could kick Seth’s ass all the way back to Iowa for making you feel this way.” I laughed, scooting closer to him.

“Kenny, thank you for coming. I couldn't do this without you.” I said, laying my head on his shoulder. He placed a light kiss to my hair.

We sat in comfortable silence for a while. Suddenly, a knock at the door, broke the silence. “I’ll get it.” Kenny said, getting up and walking to the door. Kenny looked through the peak hole on the door. Seeing the person on the other side filled him with rage, but he composed himself. Kenny opened the door. “Good evening, Seth.”

“What are you doing here, Omega? This has nothing to do with you.” Seth growled. I had started to make my way to the door, prepared to split up an all-out brawl. I placed a hand on Kenny’s shoulder.

“Ken,” I said, he shifted over, so that Seth came into my sight. “Seth, I told you I was going to have someone with me.”

“Yeah, but I figured it would be Brandi, hell, maybe even Cody.” I laughed at the mention of my brother’s name and shook my head.

“Cody wants to kick your ass.” Was all I said and Kenny interjected, “For the record, so do I.”

Kenny and I moved over to let Seth into the room because the last thing I needed was for a nosey neighbor hearing what was about to go down. The three of us moved into my dining room and sat at the table. I sat as far away from Seth as possible and Kenny moved his seat so we were shoulder to shoulder.

“So, Seth. Explain yourself.” I offered him the room to talk.

“I know what I did was awful and I will never forgive myself. But Pey, please believe me when I say she means nothing to me and I am so, so sorry.” he apologized.

“She doesn’t mean anything? Then why are you engaged, Seth? I saw the fucking pictures, with the giant rock on her hand.” I scoffed, wondering why I did this in the first place.

“She found the ring I bought for you, put it on, and took those pictures. We are not engaged.” he tried to defend himself, but something didn't feel right. I knew Mandy.

“That doesn’t change the fact that I walked in on you balls fucking deep in her in OUR locker room. Actions speak a fuck ton louder than words. I got the message. I wasted four fucking years on you. FOUR. I got pushed out of the title scene for you. I was basically demoted to a fucking escort.” I snarled, slamming my hands on the table.

Seth jumped and looked at me with sad eyes. He knew I was right, I almost ruined my career for him. "And I know Mandy. She may sleep with other people's boyfriends, but she wouldn't put on some random ring and announce she's engaged." Tears streamed down my face, and Kenny noticed, wiping them away. Seth’s sad eyes changed to jealous.

“So what, are you guys together, now?” He asked, his voice laced with envy. Kenny whipped his head to face him.

“If we were, which we aren’t, it wouldn’t be any of your fucking business. It’s called being a good friend.” Kenny seethed, gripping the edges of his chair. "You have no idea how much you hurt her."

I could tell this wasn’t going to end well. “Thank you for telling me your side of the story. But this doesn’t change anything. I think it’s time for you to go.” I sighed, and moved to get up from the table. Seth rushed to my side.

“That’s it? After everything, I only get 10 minutes to say my piece?” Seth questioned, offended. He went to touch me and I shrugged away.

I shook my head. I was done. I heard more than I needed. “I spent the last 4 months coming to terms with what happened. And I’m finally happy. I found myself again, after being lost for so long,” I paused, trying to compose myself. “I learned to love myself again. I fell in love with wrestling again, and I’m not letting anyone take that away from me.” I explained, moving away from him, giving Kenny the chance to move between us.

He pointed to the door, “I’ll walk you out.”

Seth accepted defeat and walked with Kenny, muttering a simple, “Bye Pey,” as he followed Kenny. Kenny opened the door, gesturing for Seth to walk out of it, but he stopped in the doorway. He turned around to face the other man.

“I can see you care for her, hell, you might even love her. Don’t fuck it up, Omega.” Seth advised. Kenny crossed his arms and scoffed.

“I don’t need advice from the guy who cheated on her. I know how fucking amazing she is. Goodbye, Rollins.” Kenny began shutting the door before he was even out of the way. He flipped the lock and walked back to me.

“Don’t cry anymore over him.” Was all Kenny said, wiping stray tears away from my face, before pulling me into a hug. That was the last night I ever cried over Seth Rollins.

We ended up ordering pizza and watching movies that night. Kenny had passed out half way through ‘The Greatest Showman’ mumbling about how he hates musicals. His head was in my lap, and I was running my fingers through those beautiful blonde curls. He had been my rock these last four months. I don’t know what I’d do without him.

At that moment, I realized that I was falling for him and that scared the shit out of me. Kenny made it so easy though. I did my best to push those thoughts down and finish the movie, but they were never far away.

The next morning, I woke up, surprisingly in my bed, when I remember passing out on the couch with Kenny. I got out of the bed and padded to the living room. “Ken?” I called out, not seeing him on the couch.

“Kitchen.” He replied instantly. I walked to the kitchen, finding Kenny, brewing coffee. “Morning, Princess.” He said, handing me a cup. I took the cup happily, needing the caffeine. “How did you sleep?” He asked, sipping his own coffee.

“I swore I fell asleep on the couch, with you passed out in my lap.” I teased him, moving back into the living room to sit. Kenny followed close behind.

“Yeah, sorry about that. But I woke up and you looked uncomfortable, so I moved you.” He explained, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand.

I smiled, getting myself comfy on the couch. "So Omega, what are your plans for the day?" I asked before blowing on my hot beverage.

Kenny looked at me with a huge grin on his face. Since AEW started, Kenny rarely had a day off to himself. "I'm glad you asked, princess. You have me for the whole day."

I squealed, almost spilling my coffee. "Lazy day with take out and movies? Or do you want to get presentable and go out?" I asked him.

"Let's get dressed. I want to spend a day out with my best girl." Kenny replied, setting his cup on the table, standing up and extending a hand for me to take.

"What about Kayfabe? I'm a heel now, won’t that mess with that baby face image of yours?" Kenny shook his head.

"Peyton. Fuck Kayfabe. Let's go out. Please." He smiled sweetly, batting those long eyelashes. And who could resist those grey-blue eyes.

I sighed, “Fine, we can go out and face the world.” I turned and sauntered back to my room to get dressed. I picked a maroon cami, jeans, and converses. I threw my chocolate brown hair into a messy bun, brushed my teeth, and joined Kenny in the living room again. He had gotten dressed in a pair of jeans and a plain black tee. Fuck, he looked good.

He lifted his head at the sound of my footsteps. He raised an eyebrow at my outfit. I shrugged it off. “Ready to go, Omega?” I asked, grabbing my leather jacket off the rack by my door. He hopped up, and out the door we went.

Kenny insisted that he drive, even though he was not used to Atlanta traffic. “So I have a surprise.” Kenny started, I hummed in response. “I got tickets to the aquarium. It was going to be a birthday surprise, but since we are here now, they traded days.”

“Ken! Are you serious? I haven’t been there in forever.” I bubbled, smiling so big, it hurt. “You are seriously the best friend I could ever ask for.” I had mentioned the aquarium a month ago, when we were talking about things we wanted to do but never really had the time for. I couldn’t believe he actually listened.

“You are more than welcome, Pey. I knew it would make you happy. Plus, I don’t think I’ve ever been to one.” Kenny confessed, casting a glance my way before his eyes returned to the road. Kenny really was all work and no play.

“Well, I am honored to pop that cherry for you, Omega.” I giggle, placing a hand over my heart. I could see Kenny roll his eyes before smiling. The rest of the drive to the aquarium was full of laughs and singing.

“I’m sorry, but how do people listen to this?” Kenny groaned as Brantley Gilbert flowed through the speakers.

I scoffed, feigning offense. “Brantley Gilbert is a Georgia native, show some respect. If you can’t deal with his music then we can’t be friends.” I shrugged, turning to face the window, before exploding in laughter. I couldn’t help but feel so free with him, and I hoped he felt the same way.

Arriving at the Georgia Aquarium, we quickly parked and made our way inside. We started with the tropical diver exhibit. The fish were beautiful, but nothing compared to the adult man standing next to me, looking like a small child.

He stepped closer to me, bending down to whisper in my ear. “It took less than 5 minutes to be noticed.” I cut my eyes to my right, where a few people were taking pictures. I smiled and shook my head.

“Just keep smiling and let’s have fun.” I whispered back, reaching a head out to him to follow me through to the next tank. Kenny’s words were floating in the back of my head the whole time ‘Fuck kayfabe’.

The rest of the day went by in a blur. I had never seen Kenny look so care-free. By the time we got back to my apartment that night, the wrestling world was buzzing. Kenny and I had gotten settled and were watching ‘The Mandalorian’ when Cody sent me a text with a link.

Not sure what’s going on.

You should see this. *link*

If you need me, let me know.

I clicked the link and it opened to a headline.

PEYTON RHODES MOVES ON WITH KENNY OMEGA.

From one main eventer to another, Peyton Rhodes has her eyes set on the best in the business.

Beneath the headline, it showed a picture of us with Kenny’s arm around my waist as we looked at the shark exhibit. I was pointing out sharks, and Kenny’s eyes were trained on me. I showed Kenny and he just laughed. “Let them talk, princess.” He casually threw his arm around my shoulders, pulling me into him and focused back on the show. I placed my phone on the cushion beside me, curled up closer to him, and shut out the world.

#Kenny Omega #kenny omega fic #kenny omega imagine #kenny omega smut #kenny omega fluff #cody rhodes #cody rhodes imagine #brandi rhodes #brandi rhodes imagine #matt jackson #Nick Jackson #Adam Page #friends to lovers #slow burn #kat writes

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folklord · 3 years ago

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3. winless fight

part 3 of HOAX series | din djarin x f!reader (au)

ao3 | my masterlist

summary: when you promised the Empire that you would destroy Mandalore, you did not expect that approximating your old friend would become yet another obstacle in your hoax. Suddenly, to know Din Djarin was to watch the death of your past plans and, at the same time, the creation of a faithless love.

warnings: this part is about war, literally. mentions of blood, death and injuries. emotional vulnerable din. season 2 spoilers. but don't worry, next one is all about romance | word count: 2k

thanks @mrpascals for the review <3

About ten Mandalorians stared intently at the Mand'alor instructions in the meeting room. All war strategies were taught by him in a didactic way and all questions were calmly answered. You were there for about ten minutes, waiting for your permission to speak. Bo Katan and Vizla often questioned Din about his tactics, but the two seemed to have opposite ideas. Din acted as a mediator between the polarities in the room.

"Can the Empire's presence be confirmed?" The Mand’alor asked, bringing you back to the present moment.

“I did a meticulous analysis. It was, in fact, a kind of BT-1, the ancient droid of Darth Vader.” All the Mandalorians began to whisper upon hearing the famous name, while Din continued to stare at you. “But that doesn't mean anything. The circumscribed initials are from a disabled imperial cruiser. And believe me, the Empire would not send messages or threats in the form of carcasses.”

Silence filled the room for a few seconds until Din’s voice echoed between the walls:

“You may leave. Kaya, please stay.”

It was surprising how everything was going according to your plan. Every person who left the room stared at you, especially Bo Katan - you already knew her from past situations, but her crystal eyes seemed to burn you when they analyzed you from head to toes.

Approaching Din after the last soldier left, you noticed that the visor was facing a specific place: Keldabe, the old capital. He seemed to have lost himself in his thoughts, so you decided to start a conversation.

"Din, if I may ask…" he turned to you, "Why are you so sure an imperial invasion will happen?"

"Because I screwed up Moff Gideon's plans." The tone of his voice as he spoke that very specific name sent goosebumps through your body. You kept staring at the helmet, waiting for him to explain even though you already knew what happened. “The child… Grogu was special. He is special… He was important to the Empire”

“Grogu…” you repeated the name, as an affirmation.

“Moff gave me the darksaber so easily, and laughed at Bo Katan's frustration when she saw me with the weapon that she wanted so badly… But he didn't care, as long as he had the kid.” His voice cracked. You could swear his eyes were teary. “But he didn't expect… No one expected a Jedi to save Grogu. Gideon shivered in fear as Luke Skywalker destroyed all of his droids, and he did it all alone.” The last word was said almost in a whisper. “The Empire does not dare to challenge him to get Grogu back, not without the saber that is now in my hands…”

“And you are sure that they will come because they know that Mandalore is already too weak to fight...”

Your words were chosen carefully. Din turned to face the board, and his left hand held a miniature of a Mandalorian soldier so tightly that you could only see half the helmet escaping between his thumb and forefinger. In that instant, you knew it was the perfect time for your next move because it was clear that Din took everyone out of the room to be alone with you, so he could be vulnerable. He trusted you enough to let you watch even the human being behind the tiniest beskar slowly slip between his fingers.

“Din, you saved my life… and it was so easy for you…” stepping closer, you took his hand between yours. The black glove was rough on your skin, but you didn't hesitate to draw small invisible circles over it with your thumb until Din was slowly undoing his fist. “I noticed, two different groups are respecting you and they are all fine… The child, Grogu, is fine” the miniature Mandalorian soldier was already a little crumpled, but you kept it on his palm. "There is no other Mandalorian with more honor than you."

When you finished the sentence, Din tried to remove his hand, but you pulled him by the fingers. The miniature fell to the ground, but the loud sound its fall produced was unimportant when you decided to hold his right hand as well. His hands were so big that they covered yours, but you found a way to fit them between your palms.

"I did what I had to do." His voice cracked.

“You did so much more…” you looked directly into the visor, trying to meet his eyes. “He wasn't your son and you crossed the galaxy to rescue him, you fought ruthlessly against villains to have him back… That's all Mandalore needs, a protector, a lover…”

“It was this love for him that made me less Mandalorian.”

The words came out with tremendous anger and pain. His hands dropped yours into the air, making you realize again how cold Mandalore's air was today and how he had warmed you. You rubbed your palms together to recover from the heat shock, while his last sentence still echoed in your ears. What made him less Mandalorian and yet worthy of the Crown? What had Moff Gideon not told you?

"Din, I-"

"Sir!" A child in mandalorian armor ran across the room to Din, leaving your words stuck in your throat. "Mand’alor, the Empire is here!"

His exit from the room was so fast that you almost didn't see it, and in the seconds you tried to process what had just happened, the first imperial attack came upon the skies: you saw through the window that the place you admired, where the children were playing yesterday, was already on fire.

"Kaya!" The same child who alerted Din called you, pulling you by your cloak. "The Mand'alor told me to give this to you." He handed a key into your hands. "He told you to take your weapons and go to the Great Room: Burc'ya vaal burk'yc, burc'ya veman."

The key was to the Kyr'bes Room, you deduced. Din had given you the key to the entire Mandalorian arsenal, unaware that you were the greatest imperial weapon - and you were pointed directly at him.

(...)

The next few moments went out so fast that you didn't have time to think. With the key in your hand, you opened the room and searched for your weapons. The rest of the arsenal was made of the kind of weapons that not even the soldiers could carry with their bodies and that would, therefore, also be useless to you. Din's voice echoed down the hall, mixed with the screams and doors being rashly shut.

With your weapons, you ran to the Great Room, the same one you were greeted in. Din was standing next to his throne, in front of hundreds of Mandalorians, all facing their Mand'alor.

“…and you know they only want me. So protect your ade, Mandalore's future must remain safe"

All the children were taken to a corridor on the right, and you noticed that none of them hesitated or cried. This was the most beautiful example of how Mandalore culture raised their warriors.

“We know all the strategies and we know that there are no better creatures than the Mandalorians when it comes to wars. But we also know that our weakness is in our differences. Don't you dare fall into the imperial tactic of playing us against each other… this is the oldest trick in the galaxy, and it always works.”

Din took his darksaber and walked across the room until he was face-to-face with Bo Katan.

“Someone once told me: Mandalorians are stronger together. This is the way.”

The huge doors began to open as some Mandalorians put on their helmets and took up position. The Mand'alor, in front of them all, held his saber in his right hand and the beskar spear in his left. You saw at the opening, the glare of the imperial bombs hitting the planet's ground.

“Aruetii! Aru'ela!” someone in the crowd shouted. You knew what it meant: foreigner, enemy.

Suddenly, the doors closed again. The rattling of armor echoed off the palace walls and all the Mandalorians turned against you. All the blood in your body was frozen.

One of them, in blue armor, came out of the crowd with a spear similar to Din's and pointed it at you, positioning it right in your chest. You almost acted on impulse and wrenched the spear from your body to start a fight, but Din's visor — highlighted over the crowd by the reflection of the darksaber's light — made you hesitate.

"What are you implying?" You tried to speak as calmly as possible.

"You entered the room confirming that this was an imperial droid. In the next moment, they are already on our planet. Aru'ela!”

Shit. Moff was a real son of a bitch. You weren't even allowed to take control of the situation… you were, really, just an imperial doll who needed to find a quick way out.

“Can't you smell smoke under your helmet? Your planet is coming-”

“Aru'ela!” this time, everyone screamed. Dozens of soldiers raised their weapons in your direction.

"KE'MOT!" Din's scream followed by the sound of the spear hitting one of the doors made everyone fall silent. In the next instant, everyone turned to him, except the man holding the spear, at which point was almost ripping off your clothing.

The doors opened again, probably on Din's orders, but you were too nervous to be sure. Then everyone shifted their bodies and turned their weapons down. The blue soldier with the spear ran the point down your neck, but without hurting you, just as a warning which you understood very well. When the entire doors were open, the crowd went out towards the battlefield that had become the Palace garden. It wasn't hard to tell Din apart from the rest of the crowd: his darksaber cut through every droid and every stormtrooper in just one try.

[...]

You were fighting for Mandalore. Everything you've done so far resulted at that moment when you decided to hurt the first stormtrooper - but this one seemed insignificant when you lost count of how many you'd already killed. You were an intruder, an aruetii, fighting for the wrong side as hard as your body and heart could - and you were already feeling the effects of that effort. Your now weak arms acted like an instrument of annihilation and your legs tried to find a balance between the bodies of imperial soldiers on the ground. Your entire physique felt like a death machine on autopilot. Nothing stopped you until you realized there were no more stormtroopers around, at the same moment when your eyes caught the glimmer of Din's darksaber against Moff Gideon's neck, and an imperial weapon bigger than an X-WING directed to the Mandalorian Palace.

From the distance you were, and the weakness your body was at, you couldn't see much beyond blurs. All the Mandalorians around had guns pointed at the Empire - which at that moment, as far as you could see, was just Moff Gideon and a dozen private soldiers. The instant you've managed to open your eyes again, the glow of Din's saber seems to have faded and you saw Gideon walk toward his ship. The imperial weapon was dragged into the cruiser, and everything disappeared into the sky.

When there was nothing else to distract you, your exhaustion took over. Your legs could no longer support the weight of your body, making your knees ache as you hit the sand floor. As you tried to draw in more oxygen, the right side of your body throbbed as if it had been burned. Sitting on your feet, you brought your hands up to your ribs, and shit, you were bleeding.

If there was anything in the galaxy that was divine, you'd be sure to beg now so you could at least get away near some body of water. You haven't seen or felt clean, natural water since you were a child when everything was still fine. In your dreams, you imagined your death with the sound of a lake in the background, but all you could make out at that moment was the sound of someone approaching you and beskar material crashing against some surface.

“Cyare… what did you do?”

-----

Part 4

@la-lunaluna @meetmwhallway

let me know if you want to be added on the taglist :)

#din djarin x reader #the mandalorian x ofc #the mandalorian x female oc #din djarin x you #king!din djarin #royality au #the mandalorian fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfiction

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professormembranexreader · 3 years ago

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Mem x Clumsy! Witch! Reader (Fluff)

Y/N POV

"fuckfuckfUCKFUCK-" I accidentally knocked over my jar of coriander into my pot. There goes that batch. I sighed as I headed to my sink to dump it out. I looked at the iron pot as I-

"Ow!"- walked straight into the low doorframe of the kitchen. I almost dropped the pot on my foot, but I caught myself before it happened. My foot wasn't safe, however.

The pot's contents spilled on the top of my foot, burning it. Being barefoot usually helps me get a better sense of my surroundings, and while it isn't necessary, it often yields better results...it was also way more comfortable. But in this case, it was the exact opposite. I sharply inhaled as the hot water spilled onto my cold foot, barely holding in a yelp.

"That's...not very nice-" I hissed as I limped the rest of the way to the kitchen. I dumped the remaining water into the sink and went to my bathroom to get some bandages for my foot. After doing that and bumping into several more things along the way, I decided to clean up the house so I wouldn't cause so much havoc.

To be honest, it wasn't that interesting. I cleaned some stuff, bumped into some other stuff, put away my clothes, caught my hair on a hanger, the usual. I'm just surprised I didn't trip on more things.

Finally setting down, I laid down on the couch. My boa constrictor curled up around my torso before taking up residence at my chest. It nuzzled its head affectionately into my neck and slithered back to the ground as if to say it wanted me to follow it.

"Okay there, (pet/name), where are we headed?" I jokingly said, getting back up. The snake perked its head up and pointed it in the direction of the forest I got most of my ingredients from. "Forest it is!"

I followed (p/n) through the trees and foliage. The spiritual energy felt strong here. The things grown here were perfect for using in my potions. I personally had planted several different types of trees, plants, and herbs. I continued following my familiar as they led me through the thick brush, weaving around and under stray branches and roots. Eventually (p/n) led me into the heart of a field of flowers.

I gasped. "Awww, (p/n)! How'd you know what I was planning to do tonight?" I pet its head as it slithered up and coiled around my leg. Going over to look for some roses, I started gathering ingredients for remaking the potion. I didn't need all these flowers, but they looked pretty. Not to mention they could make great flower crowns and Victorian bouquets.

After what only seemed like ten minutes, the sky began to tint itself with rosy and peach hues. "Come on, (p/n), we gotta head back before dark." It nodded and started slithering away, guiding me back to the house.

By the time we got back, the sun was just setting. I'd made a few flower crowns on the way back. Two symbolizing friendship, two symbolizing possible love, and two symbolizing passion. My plan was for him to pick one to give me some sort of sign, but chances are he wouldn't understand. That doesn't matter right now. Focus (Y/N)!

I set the crowns down on a table and started on the potion. (Comment if you can figure out what it is >;) lol) I put some fresh rose hips into the cast iron pot from before. Giving the water time to re-boil, I hung up my green fairy lights and made some more flower crowns for me and (p/n). Who says snakes can't rock flower crowns?

I heard the piercing whistle from my teapot and quickly went into the kitchen. Carefully, I poured the boiling water into the large pot over the rose hips. I quickly added a 1/2 teaspoon of catnip and a 1/8 teaspoon of crushed rosemary. I set the lid on top the "cauldron" and waited for it to steep properly while I played with (p/n).

A sudden knock on the door pulled me out of my thoughts. (p/n) coiled itself up around my neck like a scarf as I stumbled to the door.

"H-hey! What can I do for you?" I looked up at the man who was on my doorstep and oh my god it was him. Membrane was here.

"I was just wondering what that green glow was, do you mind if I investigate?" God, his deep baritone voice was so sexy. It sent shivers down my spine.

"Uh, w-well it's just my my fairy lights! Heheh," I rubbed the back of my head sheepishly, "But if you still wanna come inside, you can!" He was still for a while, before nodding. He ducked under the doorway and sat down on the couch, curiously looking at my deck of tarot cards. Watch, he's going to ask about how they work just wait.

"What are these...cards? Why do they have pictures on them?" I laughed and said that I'd tell him later after I finished making something. I strained the tea and poured two cups. I put a spoonful of honey in each cup before heading back to him.

"Before I do your reading, you want a flower crown?" I smiled. He went pink and muttered some form of "yes". He took one that was made of red carnations, gardenias, purple lilacs, and tulips. My heart jumped into my throat. That was the one for love. My eyes widened, but I quickly composed myself, sipping my tea. I took the other and put it on my head.

(p/n) slithered onto his lap, making this du- I mean weird face at me. I glared back and stuck my tongue out. Membrane looked confused until he noticed the snake around his waist. Letting out a quiet "oh" he asked me once more about the deck.

I shuffled the cards while explaining the gist of what they were. "Each card has a meaning. It can change on the way it is drawn or based on the cards it's with. Now, would you pick one of these four piles?" He did as asked and continued to watch as I kept going. "The reading I'm setting up is a three card reading. It usually is used to tell the past, present, and future of a person based on a question." I divided up the remaining stack into 3 piles and told him to pick again. This time, I spread the cards out on the table and told him to pick three. After he did so, I put the rest away in the box they came in.

"The first card you drew represents your past." Turning the card over, my eyes widened and I slightly frowned.

"What does that mean?" He asked.

"It's the Three of Swords. It means that you recently went through a state of intense sorrow. Did something happen?" He didn't answer, but I decided not to press. "There is a good side though," I started. He perked up. "The rain in the background symbolizes coming growth. You'll come out of this better than you started." I held his hand as I smiled sweetly.

"Let's see the next card." I said. I turned it over. I grinned, "This card represents the present. It's The Magician. I thought you would get this card!" I giggled. "The Magician is the master of the tools of tarot. He symbolizes awareness. Walking your talk, making your own path, I'm sure you know." I saw a slight blush from under the high collar. It went great with the flower crown.

"Last but not least, the future. This is usually a glimpse as to what you can expect soon. You may not want to risk a change. Finding that you'll get what you need, but not what you want. You have to decide if your desires can pull you out of your comfort zone." I took a moment to look at him. I could see the gears turning behind those goggles. "I bet you'll do great, don't worry."

I couldn't be sure, but I think he smiled at me. Both cups were empty, so I went to take them to the kitchen. I set my phone on the table as I left.

When I came back, he was gone. "Oh, I said quietly. I wasn't surprised. This usually happens whenever I like someone. (p/n) curled over to my phone.

I got a message.

🧪🤭Membrane🤭🧪

i love you too (y/n)

date next tuesday at 9?

read

I could hardly believe my eyes. I furiously typed a yes as I smiled ear to ear. My snake curled around my forearm as I squealed. Maybe there was hope for me after all!

#writing #membrane #professor membrane #professor membrane x reader

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lightcomingthroughthedarkness · 4 years ago

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Why we had to see that Becho Flashback and the Bellarke of it all

Alright, this is going to be a long one.

That flashback, and the way it is presented to the audience, exists for two reasons.

1. To enhance Echos’s storyline and struggles

2. Frankly? Because Jason was answering the criticism that we never saw Becho get together. Whether we like the Flashback or not, he doesn’t give a crap.

Basically, two birds. One giant stone, lol

Bellamy approaches Echo, they immediately start to joke around, indicating that while Bellamy hasn’t necessarily had a close relationship with her, he also hasn’t been openly antagonistic either. However Bellamy is still Bellamy, so they gave him 3 years, lol. Bellamy makes an effort to connect with Echo and the way to do that is to talk about the things that have made Bellamy dislike and distrust her in the past. It is afterall what binds them, their (shared) experiences. Echo’s actions that caused Bellamy pain. Octavia, Gina/MW. Echo has since season 2 looked up to Bellamy and we can see in this scene that she does feel some sort of way about her actions (her reluctance to look Bellamy in the eye). But Echo actually opens up the POSSIBILITY of working through those experiences when she starts to talk about them.

Bellamy shuts her down though. Bellamy’s intention here is to reach out to Echo, to be the leader he needs to be to keep them alive, to be the head and the heart the way Clarke asked him to be, to make sure that Clarke’s death was not in vain. That means Bellamy needs to grow and he needs to forgive. He cannot live with anger and resentment. It won’t keep them alive and it won’t help them work together to achieve Bellamy’s greatest goal between season 4 and season 5; TO GET BACK TO EARTH. That’s why Bellamy is all ”family this, together that, unit here” bla bla, lol.

Next up. Their strengths and weaknesses. Bellamy believes Octavia is his weakness because of the lengths he is willing to go for her and everything he’d do for her (Bellamy has since learned that Octavia is not his responsibility and love does not bring you down). Echo says Octavia is his strength. However they are coming at it from two different perspectives. Echo looks at Bellamy’s LOYALTY and dedication to Octavia as his strength. Someone to fight for, to commit to. It’s not that Echo is thinking ”Bellamy’s LOVE for his sister is the strength”. It’s what Bellamy does with it and how he shows that love that Echo draws from. Meanwhile from Bellamy’s point of view, it’s his unwavering love for his sister that motivates him. LOVE. Not a sense of loyalty for the sake of loyalty. It’s not that Echo can’t see love as motivation, it’s that Echo has no control of her feelings and how to express them or separate them. To Echo loyalty is love, dedication and commitment. And they are, depending on how you use them a way to express that love. So Bellamy being loyal to Octavia and going above and beyond for her, is his way of showing love, in Echo’s eyes. Even if Bellamy has to do horrible things for Octavia. Bellamy however does not see it that way. Perspective, people.

Which Bellamy points out to Echo. Her weakness is her loyalty. She will do things she knows is wrong for the people she is loyal to. That’s not right. You also have to do the right thing for the right reasons. Blindly following someone and not question them or yourself is how you end up with.. well, Echo. Or how Bellamy could have ended up had he stayed with Pike. Echo is taken aback by Bellamy’s comment here. ”How can loyalty be a bad thing”. ”it is when you do the wrong things because of it”. Bellamy has already learned this lesson. We’ve seen how loyalty is all Echo knows. She has done horrible things for other people because that is how Echo functions and how she shows love and dedication. But love does not destroy you. Love lifts you up. For Echo right now in season 7? We are seeing how losing Bellamy, her king, is detroying her because her overwhelming grief right now is the chaos that are ALL her feelings ALL AT ONCE and she does not control them or understand them and she does not know how to seperate them. Bellamy learned to separate his love for Octavia and feeling responsible for her. Echo has not. Who the fuck is Echo and what does she feel?

Which is why Bellamy ASKS Echo to be loyal to him and spacekru. Bellamy believes that Spaeckru are a family and will do things for the right reasons because he/they have learned after their experiences on the ground to do better (in season 5). Bellamy will go back down to the ground, be the leader Clarke wanted him to be and they will do things differently and better than before. If Bellamy and spacekru can show Echo a different way, then Echo will learn and do differently too. Right?

Shape-shifter Bellamy calls it like it is. Echo is a shape-shifter. She will become who she needs to become for other people. That’s dangerous if you do not have a sense of self. And we have seen Echo become who she needs to become because of the people she follows. She was who she was for Nia, for Roan, for Bellamy and for Spacekru. When she follows them, she is what they need from her. Which is why Bellamy belives that Echo has changed when we get back on the ground in season 5. Bellamy is running around all like ”Echo has changed. She proved herself on the ring”. And everyone was like ???? The irony that Bellamy called her out on being a shape-shifter and then he couldn’t see that Echo has become one for him as well. (Which is why Bellamy yells at Echo in 6x04 because she isn’t acting the way Bellamy needs her to act meanwhile Echo doesn’t know how Bellamy needs her to act because she can’t separate those feelings and because she doesn’t know that Bellamy actually wants her to act like Clarke). So why can’t Bellamy see that or understand Echo?

The Bellamy part of the flashback Like I said, he is trying to be the man and the leader he needs to be in order to make sure Clarke’s death was not in vain. He carries Clarke with him and he can’t bear the thought of letting Clarke down. So The Head we must become.

Notice how Bellamy barely lets Echo speak. Notice how Bellamy interrupts her and is all ”Echo, Echo…” when she is trying to actually say something. Every time Echo brings up the past, Bellamy is there to push her to the future. Basically ”lets not look back, we’ve all done bad things, we need to be a team, we need to move forward” etc. Bellamy cannot stay in the past. That’s where all his pain is. That’s where he had to do horrible things. That’s where he left his sister alone. That’s where Clarke is dead. Bellamy is so traumatized by what happened that he is desperately pushing for the future. By the grace of God herself, Bellamy will bring them home and he will not allow Clarke’s death to be in vain. Has Bellamy admitted to himself why he is runing towards the future so hard? On the Surface, sure. But I Think any deeper would have been too painful for him. Logically he knows they need to move on and survive. But admitting to himself that Clarke’s death broke him and that’s why he is so adamant to push everything aside probably would have made it worse for him (see how he lashed out at Murphy for mentioning Clarke’s name in season 5).

The kiss Well… Why did we need to see them kiss? First of all, straight up because of the backlash from fans that we never got to see Becho get together. Here we kill two birds with one stone. They were gonna do a flashback either way, might as well answer that question too. Bellamy and Echo could have had that conversation without kissing and nothing would have changed, we would have understood the message. But you don’t spend time and money in Hollywood for nothing. You got the actors, you got the set, you got the time and you got the (new) chance to explain an undeveloped story? You kill two birds with one stone. But I believe there is a third stone in this equation.

”How do we show Echo becoming a shape-shifter right in front of us while also showing the audience where her complex relationship to Bellamy came from?”

You make Bellamy make the move on Echo. Bellamy shows her kindness, willingness to give her a new home and a new leader. Echo is willing to become loyal to Bellamy (shape-shifting moment from Echo kom Azgeda happens right in front of us, she becomes Echo kom spacekru) BUT how do we also make Echo confused about her feelings for Bellamy as we have seen her question in 7x01? They kiss and turns their spy/king dynamic on its ass. But also, most importantly, it keeps Bellarke from becoming canon. Echo pulls back because she did not expect that kiss from Bellamy. Bellamy is literally pleading with her, look at his damn face, he needs this, he needs to move on, he needs to work towards something or the past will swallow him whole. He literally kissed her so she’d stop talking about what is ”real”. Echo questioning what is real on the ring, means quesationing Bellamy’s belief that Clarke’s death will not have been in vain, they will do better, they must do better so they have to believe in it too. And thus begins Echo’s very complicated relationship with Bellamy. She gives him her loyalty and he becomes her leader. But they are human, alone and both attractive and she likes the kiss, so they both give in to that attraction. And it keeps Bellamy motivated on the future he so desperately thinks they can have; by moving on, by surving, by going back to the ground, by showing Clarke’s ”spirit” that he did it. Her Death was not in vain. Bellamy’ s intentions are good but oh boy did they come from his Clarke trauma. And that’s not fair on Echo. But she also needed him to follow and it worked on the ring, where nothing could touch them and there were no risks. Doesn’t work with Clarke back in Bellamy’s Life. Bellamy came alive when he got Clarke back. Echo lost her mind when she lost Bellamy because she lost her identity. Which Octavia talks to her about too, since Octavia lost her identity when Lincoln died.

In that one flashback we get to see how Becho got together (problem fixed), where Echo’s ACTIVE identity struggles started, where the lines between her king/her boyfriend are blurried, where Bellamy is desperately trying to be the man and leader Clarke asked him to be and ultimately the very real reasons Bellamy and Echo do not work. Bellamy told her that her loyalty is her weakness and still she has not worked through that, which we now get to see and it is not pretty. That’s not to say that they didn’t grow to love each other and become a family too (”We’re family and nothing will change that - 5x01). They did, they had to. Spacekru shared 6 years. But Jason wanted to tell us where Becho came from and why they came to be. Rooted in trauma. And instead of helping each other grow the way Bellarke do, they instead hold each other back. Echo needs to break free for herself and Bellamy needs his person, Clarke.

#becho #bellarke #the 100 #the 100 season 7

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austarus · 4 years ago

Text

Harrison Wells (Eobard Thawne) Integrated Revelations (3/3)

**A/N: The picture/edit/gif does not belong to me.

**Hey guys, enjoy the final installment! Meanwhile, I’m going to go cry about physics because our physics department is shit and I’d rather much learn from Eo or Harry physics since they’ll actually teach me. Please don’t forget to comment, like, and reblog. It means a lot to content creators of all kinds!

Part 1 Part 2

Word Count: 5770

“Right here,” future Barry responded calmly as he entered the Cortex. Both versions made eye contact before future Barry sighed to himself. He knew he royally screwed up big time. The speedster was supposed to be in and out with the speed equation. I didn’t intend to get them all tangled with- with that Time Wraith… What’s done is done, but at least I know Thawne and I are in the same boat. Barry took a glimpse at you. Not that it’ll matter anyway. He won’t deny the immense hole that would dig itself in your chest a year from now. Stoic and devoid of any of the warm emotions you normally bring to the labs. It… is what it is. Eddie made his choice that day, ‘there are no such things as coincidences’.

“Okay,” Cisco stepped out of the small lab with Caitlin following behind. “Not how I expected today to turn out.” You gave Eobard a look as if to say, you trained him. Eobard ignored the meaning behind your glance while you both remained in the side lab, observing the interaction between these four.

“Yeah,” Future Barry agreed quietly to himself.

“Okay, so I'm-who are... who are you?” Present Barry stumbled over his words, his mind trying to catch up with what his eyes were seeing.

“Who is he? Who are you?” Caitlin chimed in with an arched brow, eyes moving between the two Barry’s

Present Barry frowned at the biological genius. “What do you- I'm Barry. I'm Barry. Your Barry. He's-”

“-Your doppelganger.” You face-palmed at Cisco’s revelation, whispering an ‘oh my god’ to yourself while directed your gaze up to the ceiling. Eobard started to wheel out of the small side lab, where you and held be at the back of the standing group.

“No, not yet.” Eobard gave Future Barry a subtle incredulous look as he continued to talk. He clenched a fist tightly, resting an arm on the armrest of his wheelchair You mouthed, ‘Bro, just shut up!’ and even made hand gestures to your mouth. “I am you, Barry. Just… different.” Present Barry nodded in awe.

Cisco looked between the two, an urge to know which Barry’s a fraud or not, and if any of this is actually real, “Wait a second, how do we know which one's the real Barry?”

A hurt look crossed Present Barry’s puppy-like expression, “Dude, okay, I've watched ‘Wrath of Khan’ with you like five times.”

“Imposter!” Cisco pointed an accusatory finger at Future Barry. You know, the one that’s been running around this entire time after the comms incident and insistence on a speed equation.

Eobard just shook his head at the nonsense between the two Barry’s and Cisco, trying to somehow keep it together before he popped a blood vessel. “Yeah, and every time at the end, you turn to me and you say, ‘I have been and always shall be your friend’."

“Haha! You, imposter!” Cisco cried out in frustration, both arms directed at the two different Barry’s. Caitlin just narrowed her eyes to a squint at Present Barry. “What is going on here?” You were just baffled at this point and 1000% done with Bartholomew Henry Allen aka the best person to run his mouth and reveal everything.

“Okay, guys, I'm sorry. This was not supposed to happen. The tranq dart that Caitlin made,” Eobard started gesturing for Future Barry to not mention anything, “was supposed to last a lot longer.”

“I did not give him a tranq dart,” Caitlin defended herself, arms up as an act of innocence.

“Okay, no, yes, not you, the you from the time that I am from.” You were now just screaming on the inside because Future Barry just kept talking, revealing things he shouldn’t be and exactly what he did to knock his past self out. Eobard just gave up sending visual signs and mouth words to stop talking like any sensible person. You just gave Eobard an a ‘I don’t know what to do with this one anymore’ look, and you’re pretty sure he was have the same thoughts. You sighed inaudibly when Eobard just shook his head in defeat and shrugged his shoulders at you.

“The time that you are from?” Present Barry asked with a high level of disbelief, the words sounding foreign on his tongue.

“I think what he's trying to say is he's from the future,” Eobard finally stepped in (not literally, just figuratively), wheeling himself forward. His eyes hadn’t left Barry’s, maintaining a sort of placid look, but the emotion behind his eyes were far from stoic. Of course, now he was dealing with two ridiculous speedsters of his archnemesis. You saw Eobard run his thumb over the tips of his fingers on one hand while the other remained on the control panel of the wheelchair.

“The future?”

“Yeah.”

“The future?”

“Yes.”

“Wait, the future,” Present Barry was cut off the third time he asked.

“Yes,” replied for the third time in a flat tone, Eobard’s mind already launched into various ways to keep Present Barry from learning the truth of his identity and intentions. More importantly, all the ways the yellow speedster can keep you safe and out of the scarlet speedster’s grasp for any sort of leverage against himself.

“Are we saying I can time-travel?” Present Barry finally questioned his future self.

Future Barry chuckled lightly, nodding gently, “One day.”

“Oh, that explains the white on the symbol.” Cisco piped up once more, ideas whirling through his mind already. You saw your other best friend’s excitement rise at the possible time theories. “Well, wait a second. Suppose we now change your emblem. Will it be because we got the idea from this? Or, I mean, that would mean-”

“Stop talking.” Eobard shut Cisco up before rounding his heated gaze to Future Barry with a pointed finger. “You stop talking too, all right? More you say, the more the timeline is disrupted. Now I'm going to assume that your presence here is the reason that thing is attacking us. Hm?” Eobard tried a 3rd time to signal Barry to play along without giving any more information of the future to his past self and the others. The tone change should have been a clear indicator too.

“What? What thing?” Present Barry’s face contorted in confusion at Dr. Wells.

He legit looks like a lost puppy.

“Have you ever seen ‘The Frighteners’?” Cisco asked his present time buddy, who nodded at the reference. “It's sort of like that, but scarier and faster and it's after you-after him.” The mechanical genius corrected himself, pointed at the future version of his best friend.

“Yeah, it's been chasing me ever since I got here,” Future Barry confessed.

“Okay, so how do we stop it?” Present Barry looked to everyone for some kind of answer.

“We don't know.” You responded with Eobard, glancing at one another before running a hand through your hair tiredly. You wanted to just go home and lie down on a bed with a fluffy blanket with your boyfriend beside you, threading a hand through your hair while you give him teasing kisses just to hear that deep chuckle. Three Barry’s is too much in one day, if I’m going to be honest.

“Then what are we gonna do?” Present Barry raised an eyebrow in confusion.

“The one thing we can.” You and the others watched Eobard roll away, he had a plan or came up with some sort of reasonable plan. Both Barry’s glanced at each other once more, but this time a look of awe and a wave of thrill definitely rushed through both. Possibly infecting Cisco along with them. But they knew better, knew that this Time Wraith creature could hurt anyone and that the Team needed leveled heads to eradicate it.

***

“What-What are we doing here?” Future Barry questioned, entering the Time Vault with you and Eo. His green eyes couldn’t help but glance over the yellow suit with Dr. McGee’s Tachyon device attached to it. The staged night mulled through his mind rapidly thanks to his speedster abilities. How they were all tricked into essentially handing it over to the Reverse Flash. Either way it seemed that Thawne was going to get it. Charging it up for the next time Eobard would need it. Pressing your lips to a thin line, you immediately drew up the necessary schematics and scans for the city on your tablet.

“We're here for the answer to your speed equation...” Eobard held up an odd flash drive as he stepped over to the plinth, popping it in. The villainous speedster turned back to you and Barry. “The reason that you traveled back to this time, and the key to running faster. Tachyon enhancement.”

“The tachyons should give you just enough speed to time travel back to your time without getting caught by the Time Wraith.” You added in, not really knowing if this Barry has actually used Tachyons before or not. “If anything, you just need to time things right to get through the breach and have someone on the other side destroy the Time Wraith. Either way once you start using your speed it’ll find you.”

“I know what it does, I just don’t see why you’re needed here when you can be helping the others out there,” Barry scowled at you, to which you rolled your eyes with lips pressed into a thin line. You’re already done with this shit attitude since he’s been here, but the frostiness in his demeanor honestly did hurt in some part of your heart. The corner of Eobard’s mouth twitched with the amount of disrespect that he’s been showing you since this version of Barry Allen had traveled here.

“That’s it, if you keep talking to her like that then there’s going to be more hell to pay for it. You won’t be just dealing with the Time Wraith, Allen.”

“Is that a threat?”

“It’s a warning,” Eobard looked at Barry with dangerously feral eyes. “You have a problem; you deal with me. Don’t you dare think of involving her in this feud.”

Barry kept his mouth shut for a moment, “This was not the deal.” He gestured to the plinth.

Eobard retracted the flash drive from the white column plinth once everything had been correctly copied to it. “If you think that I'm gonna hold your hand this entire way, you're sadly mistaken. Everything you need is on this drive. You follow its instructions; you will enhance the Speed Force in your system and run faster...” He dropped it in Barry’s open palm, “than you ever thought possible.”

“If this doesn't work, I'm coming back.”

Yeah, please don’t. I’m content without dealing with another Barry-time incident.

Cisco’s voice erupted from the comms set up all over the labs. “Dr. Wells, we need you.”

Eobard gave Barry one last look, whether it was a warning or a threat, you couldn’t tell. “Time to go home, Flash,” he responded sardonically.

***

The futuristic speedster exhaled through his nostrils, rubbing his face harshly as we stepped up from his wheelchair. The labs were vacant at the moment. His mind reeled through all the events that happened today. Tropical waters blue eyes flickered to the windows, he noticed that the sun was still in the air from the amount filtering into the Cortex. Eobard shifted his focus to the computer monitor, a thought whirling in his mind ever since both versions of this present time’s Barry had showed up. Words, phrases, hints. Everything that both had said to him about his future. I can’t trust either. With furrowed eyebrow’s, the dark-haired Wells impersonator ran a finger over the knuckles of his opposite hand. Not with my life on the line and her heart caught in the crossfire of it all. Guilt welled up in his chest, causing his stomach to churn uncomfortably.

A few seconds passed, he pulled out his phone to check the time. That was the excuse he gave himself because Eobard Tiberius Thawne knew exactly what time it was, there were clocks almost on every monitor screen in the cortex. But really, he was checking his lock screen picture. It was a picture of you on the beach of Coast City, gazing out onto the shoreline with the sun setting behind you. The fluffy clouds were dusted with velvety pinks and fiery oranges while the sun dipped to meet the cool blue waters. A candid picture, if you will. The sight of you allowed his tensed muscles to relax slightly. Eobard remembered how his heart had forcibly stopped, urging him to take a picture. How you added even more beauty to nature’s elegant scenery. How the waves gently glided with each, only to cascade onto the beach. You had coaxed Eobard to finally get out of the labs for once, to just take a trip somewhere for the evening. He had some speed after all. Just some time for you and him, that Barry and the others can handle one evening without him for guidance. “They’re adults Eo, let them handle a meta situation by themselves.” His heart ached if he were to… pass, leaving you here to face the others… alone.

His thoughts flickered back to the current situation at hand. He didn’t- He didn’t want to go down that trail of somber thoughts. Eobard had finally managed to convince you to go home for the day, he saw the exhaustion on your tensed shoulders, and he worried. He had allowed Barry to speed you home, that way you’d have arrived safely. The speedster knew what you would exactly do once you got home. Change into that new set of pajamas she recently bought, make some food while singing at the top of her lungs. Probably scare off a few birds and squirrels in the process. It’s sushi night, tonight. That’ll be interesting to see her make. Reluctantly, Eobard had to push thoughts of tonight off to the back of his ind.

“Alright.” A long sigh left his lips as he plopped down on a chair, adjusting his dark-clear glasses and recording remote in hand. Eobard slipped off his glasses, pressing his lips together tightly while avoiding the gaze of the camera. He needed to record some kind of will in case… Finally, looking up, he saw the determination in his own eyes, the realization of how his words could also be a possibility of occurring. “Hello, Barry. If you're watching this, that means something has gone horribly wrong.” While Eobard gathered his thoughts, he paused as an image of you popped into his head, he looked away. He swallowed thickly, “I'm dead and the last 15 years have been for nothing. Bummer.” He quirked an eyebrow ironically as his eyes meet the camera once more.

***

You pouted slightly, staring down at the bottle of painkillers on the granite-top island before your eyes glanced to your boyfriend’s alcohol cabinet. The headache would just not go away! With socked feet, you stood in the chilly kitchen in a new oversized sweatshirt and cotton running shorts. Your hair was in a loose, messy bun with the hood up over your head because the bum look is the most comfortable look, if we’re being honest. Do I want to make good choices tonight? You swallowed a bit and tapped a finger to your chin with your eyes flickering between the two once more. Your left arm crossed over your chest with your right elbow resting in your left palm, clenching and unclenching your right hand. Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, you chanted in your head as a pointed finger went back and forth between the Ibuprofen and alcohol cabinet. Halfway through the nursery rhyme, you found your gaze lingering more and more to Eobard’s tempting stash. Bad choices it is. With that you push the pills further away on the island and stomp over to the cabinet.

Why the fuck is bourbon the only thing here? You tilted your head with a raised eyebrow at the two fancy glass bottles. I swear this is the only thing he drinks when he needs to let loose a bit. Fancy bastard. Puffing out a breath, you grabbed the weighty glass bottle and shut the cabinet. I should get him to try a margarita or something. Pouring yourself half a cup of the amber-ish liquid, adding in a few ice cubes as you had seen Eobard do. You sealed the alcohol and put it away. You took a small sip, mentally knowing whether it tasted good or bad, you’d finish it. The liquid burned the back of your throat, allowing you to cough a bit before really tasting the drink. You shrugged looking at the cup. Not bad… I can see why he’s addicted to it. Though I still prefer my fruity drinks to hard liquor.

You saw a torrent of red lighting flash past the front door and to the direction of your shared bedroom. Someone’s home early. Shutting your eyes for a moment, you leaned back against the opposing counter to the island close to the fridge.

After a few moments, your speedster boy toy (yes, you use that phrase to describe Eobard mentally, ignoring its actually meaning because well… he’s your man and… he vibrates. Like a toy. You’re welcome.) strides through his home and to the kitchen, a towel hanging around his shoulders as he uses one hand to dry his hair. Eobard shot you a concerned look after seeing the bourbon and painkillers out.

“Don’t worry, I decided to make bad decisions with only alcohol.” You stand with one leg crossed in front of the other, handing him the cup so he can take a sip. He wouldn’t ever refuse his bourbon. “What happened to conserving your speed?”

“Couldn’t miss out on sushi night, also I wanted to wash up from all the... You know. I had too many Barry’s around me and I needed to scrub that off.” He shrugged at you, sipping the whiskey drink. You giggled, shaking your head at his dramatics about ‘Barry germs’. Eobard smiled to himself at your giggle, the sound of it made his speedster heart do multiple flips. He threw the towel in an empty bin by the laundry room.

“Sushi is located on the bottom shelf of the fridge.”

Eobard set the cup down and slightly narrowed his eyes at you. “Oh, you’re evil.”

“Learned from the best,” you winked at him, taking back your cup and downing the alcohol. Payback’s a bitch for all the times you purposefully put my things on the highest top shelf.

Slipping out the plate of sushi, there were six rolls left because obviously you ate some while you waited for him to come home. To be fair, you would have devoured the rest if he decided to stay in late at the labs. He took a roll and ate it while you poured yourself another drink with a second cup for him as well. “Mm, these are actually good. Nicely done, kitten.” He teased when he fully indulged in its taste and texture with that boyish smirk of his. You couldn’t help but play along.

“Are you insinuating that I’m not a good cook?”

“You’re just questionable at times, depends on the recipe.” Eobard continued eating, savoring every delectable sushi roll.

“At least I didn’t burn the pasta last time.”

“That was one time and I had to deal with Cisco and Barry on the phone!”

“Excuses, excuses,” you replied with a satisfied hum, pushing his glass to him.

“What about the time you added sugar instead of salt to the Königsberger Klopse?”

“They look the exact same and they were beside each other! It was an accident and you know it.”

“Excuses, excuses,” he mocked you with a cheeky grin, picking you up and setting you to sit on top of the cool granite island top. He leaned down to plant a kiss to your lips, a hand trailing to up your thigh. You shivered at his touch.

“You know, I didn’t notice it until today, but Barry’s a bit taller than you.”

“Your point?”

“Think it’s kinda ironic though. You’re shorter than he is, and you don’t have all your speed right now.”

“…”

“Is that also another reason why you hate him?”

“He’s like an inch taller than me, hardly anything to compete with him about. And my speed exceeds his own, especially in the past and with experience.” Eobard growled lowly, “Less thinking about him, more focus on kissing me.”

A cheery noise left your lips when he leaned once more for another kiss. This time hungrier with a hint of possessiveness. You knew how to push his buttons. Wrapping your arms around him, you pulled the speedster closer to you which allowed him to slot between your open legs. He smirked against your lips, feeling himself press against you. You played with the little hairs at the back of his neck as he began to nip at your lips. A little gasp left you which allowed his tongue to enter, exploring your mouth as you made a little satisfactory noise. His lips devoured your own. Your body moved on its own, pressing closer to him, his hands roughly wrapped your legs around his waist. The air felt hot and sticky, his speedster body warming up significantly at your every touch. Your hood fell off your head from the passionate kiss, loose strands of hair falling out from your messy bun. It felt exhilarating! Pulling away with one slow and sensual kiss, Eobard rested his forehead against yours as a heavy breath left him. His half-lidded eyes glossed over yourself- cheeks tinted red, breathing raggedly from the intensity of the kiss, and lips wonderfully swollen.

You both shared a small breath, feeling the world spin and spin, but the moment was just intoxicating. Neither of you wanted the moment to end. Letting out a yawn, you covered your mouth and Eo just chuckled lowly. Your hands now rested against his chest, feeling the pounding of his pulse underneath your palm. Eobard licked his lips at you, kissing your neck and nibbling lightly on your collarbone. You sucked in a breath, one hand running through his dark locks. His ears perked at the sound of his name leaving your pouty lips. Kneeling down for a moment, Eobard kissed the inside of your thigh before glancing up at you. You had your bottom lip between your teeth, gently gnawing at it as you observed him. The speedster only winked at you, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively before giving you a few more kisses and nibbles. He stood up once more to tower over you, kissing your temple as another yawn fell from you.

You’re too cute, my precious queen.

Eobard sped you to the bedroom with fiery red eyes and a coy smirk on his face, plopping you on the plush king-sized bed. A bed you had to continually badgered him to get with the promise that ‘rolling around in it’ would be much more fun than just with a queen-sized bed. He had already propped you up against the large pillows and under the comfort of the blankets. Eobard took the spot beside you, carding a hand through his now wild tresses. The speedster noticed your pained expression when you reached for your forehead, his insides churned at the sight. He reached out a cool hand to gently massage your temples. A little hum of relief escaped your lips, shutting your eyes at his cold fingers. The scientist assumed your alcohol consumption tonight was to lessen any pain from your head.

“That feels nice,” You mused to your boyfriend, curling up beside him. He curled his arms around you, your head resting on his sturdy chest. “The Barry that traveled with his daughter, I saw a few things when they talked.”

“I figured, have… you seen anything else?”

You shook your head ‘no’. “Only Savitar and Cicada, just the general foresight of their appearance,” you fiddled with the necklace he had given you, looking away. Eobard’s eyes caught the shift in your mood.

“What’s wrong, kitten?”

“Hm, nothing.”

“You only ever play with your necklace when something’s bothering you.” Eobard ran his teeth of his lower lip before taking one of your hands in his. “I swore to you that I would tell you whatever’s on my mind, especially when prompted by you. We both promised to be honest with each other, especially when it’s about our feelings.” His thumb rubbed soothing circles on your skin. The dark-haired man’s other hand hooked a finger under your chin, tilting your head to look at his softened gaze. He waited patiently for you.

You pulled away from him, “I just-I don’t know which Barry to trust. You… what if your plan to go home still fails? Even after they’d assured you’d go home when you help them? Both versions!” Your headache started to form once more, but not from your psychic powers. There was something else you weren’t entirely sure of either…

“…” Eobard exhaled through his nose soundlessly. He hadn’t wanted you to pick up on those clues… It broke him that you did. “I can only do what I can to go back. Failure isn’t an option. Not anymore, especially with how far I’ve gone.” The murdering, lying, stealing, scheming, and masquerading. All of it. “Do you trust me?”

“Always.”

“Then trust my plan… I’m doing everything I can with the least amount of collateral damage being caused in this time period.” You just nodded at his words, but that didn’t alleviate the certain weight you now secretly carried in your heart. Sighing to yourself, you decided to push it aside for the night.

“I hate how you can read me like an open book.”

“I hate that that beautiful mind of yours doubts yourself.” Eobard ran a hand over his face. I like that I can read you because then I can understand you. Especially if it’s when I can be doing better when it comes to us. I’m harder to read because… I’ve never really had someone quite like you in my life. Someone I can trust with no doubt in mind that you’re using me or going to backstab me. I’ll do better, I promise. For you, I’ll be good.

Pressing your lips into a thin line, you shift away from him on the bed to sit up with a serious look in your eyes. “I-I need you to be honest with me.”

“Always.”

“No lies. No shading the truth. None of that.”

The dark-haired speedster nods, returning your seriousness by adjusting himself. He wouldn’t dream of lying to you, ever. When he came clean to you and swore to you, Eobard intended to keep his word. You were the one thing that… that he wouldn’t mind spending the rest of his life with. Someone as precious as you that had grown so close to his crooked heart. His love that he could confide in all his fears and doubts and thoughts. You’re his special person.

“Eobard,” you started, “What do you think of me? Like, when you look at me?”

He remained quiet for a moment, looking past you before refocusing his eyes onto your locked gaze. A smile twitched at the corners of his lips. “I think of a cheeky and persistent person that can be a real pain in my ass sometimes.” You raised an eyebrow at him and crossed your arms as he continued. “But a spectacle, nonetheless, put together with strong willpower and fierce determination to achieve whatever she puts her mind to. I think of that kind heart of yours and… how it accepted a flawed and corrupt man as myself. I see a queen that keeps me grounded, a person that encourages me to grow and achieve my goals. I think of home.” You had unfurled your arms, your gaze softening as your heart ached at his words. “A home that I can return to at the end of the day with no shame. I can just be a man with none of my baggage or sins. I-I can love you with no guilt or shame or doubt. All your imperfections and quirks, they’re mine to cherish.” The scientist had traced the side of your face as his piercing gaze held you down, hypnotizing you.

“Eo,” you trailed off as he took a hold of your hand, softly kissing each knuckle. Leaning forward, you place a chaste kiss on his forehead before reaching for his lips. The kiss was soft, heartwarming, pure. All the things that the Reverse Flash was not because of his atrocious deeds in this time period and hunger for revenge against Barry Allen in whatever way possible, yet… Another thought flickered through your mind as your lips parted his. “Is Gideon able to tell you what happens to your future?”

Eobard simply shook his head, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “It only reveals the article about Barry, my supposed final battle with The Flash before he disappears.” After a Crisis, but which one would come first?

“But then what happens to you?”

“I don’t know.”

You sucked a breath in before opening your mouth once more, “I don’t want to be without you.” Is that selfish?

Eobard’s eyes widened a fraction, his stomach fluttering.He licked his lips slowly, eyeing your desperate gaze. “If I wasn’t a selfish man, I would have stayed away. But I am selfish and just the way you look, even then, it fuels my desire to be by your side. At every moment. Until death do us part.”

Your breath hitched; you should have been scared- terrified- repulsed- by his words. Red flags that would have gone off in any person’s mind, but- “I’m selfish too,” you whispered the words that came from the heart. Eobard watched you with electric blue eyes, a feral flash of red flickered behind his irises. You trailed a hand over his chest and over his heart. “Your mind, your heart,” You glanced at him under your eyelashes, “are mine. I don’t want them to belong to anyone else.”

“I’m not a good man. I can’t be what you want me to be.” I will never be good for you.

“…” You pressed your lips into a thin line. “You’re not good man, Eobard, but you’re more than enough for me.”

“You should have run the first time you found out.”

“I should have, but I don’t regret choosing you… I don’t want anyone else but you, Eo.”

“I am yours, and you are mine.” The speedster was truly smitten by you, gingerly he cupped your face with a firm hand as his azure eyes met yours. “I would do everything in my power to come back home to you.” He craned his head down to reconnect your lips together. There were no limits to how far Eobard Tiberias Thawne would go for him to remain by your side.

Even if it meant killing another person.

***

Barry and Nora ran through the speed-force, memories and events weaving past them as the sped through to return to their present time. “Back in Time,” by Huey Lewis still played in the background right as the touched the concrete ground of the Cortex.

“Did you even go?” Ralph asked with a terrified-ish look on his face.

Caitlin and Cisco just chuckled at their friend. Cisco shut of the music, “Told you time travel was weird.”

You had stopped in the corridor, overhearing the team in the hallway. Frozen in place as things started to set in your mind. A headache washed over you, but you had gotten used to them by now. You had to after Flashpoint. But you knew things had gone south, and by south, they had to take a detour. You were digesting the immediate revelations, all of it integrating together as things in the past now made sense. Both versions of Barry Allen knew the outcome. Yet Nora and her father revealed more than they should have to Eobard. After all, your psychic abilities allowed you to see what happens if the timeline that you’re involved in. Especially when it had to do with one handsomely intelligent and driven speedster by the name of Eobard Tiberias Thawne.

But did things really change? I’m still here. And Eobard…

You ran a hand over your face, pinching the bridge of your nose. Your feet carried you to the Time Vault while the others prepared for tonight. Pressing a hand to the wall, you unlocked the futuristic door into the neutral-colored room. A chill ran down your spine as you approached the plinth. Waving a hand over the circular center, you activated Gideon. The AI appeared in all its holographic form.

“Yes, Ms. (Y/N)?”

“Gideon,” your fingers ran over the chain of your necklace, “I need your help with something.”

“I am at your service.”

“I need you to…” you ran your tongue over your lips. Heart pounding in your chest as you chose your next words carefully. “I need you to tell me where Eobard is?”

“I’m sorry Ms. (Y/N), but I am unable to process your request right now.”

“Why?” Your voice rose, red was now seeping into your vision.

“It is not within my programming capabilities.”

“Is Eobard alive?”

“I’m sorry, but that is also out of my-”

“Then what good are you for?” You yelled in pure frustration, a fist slamming harshly onto the white column. A tear had left your eyes. Your body trembled as your voice shook when you spoke up again, “Gideon please, anything. Any news about Eobard is all I need. Any sign that he is alive. I can’t-”

Until death do us part.

“…” The AI was silent for a moment while you collected yourself miserably. “There is a hidden message for you that Dr. Wells wished for you to receive. Would you like to read the message?”

“A-a message, what-” You ran both hand through your locks, glassy eyes searching the placid look on the AI. The stone of doubt was slowly eroding away from your heart. “I-I, yes! Please!” The AI pulled up a screen, three simple words were configured in medium-sized black lettering. Your heart stopped for a moment as your hands tingled. Blinking a few times, you reread the words over and over and over- as it stared back at you.

Wait for me.

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