#i said to myself that i wouldn't make any parallels of this BUT I CAN'T HELP MYSELF

[itsallaboutbl]

Love in the air (2022) // Love in the Air: Koi no Yokan (2024)

[king-crawler]

HEY HI HELLO

Sorry for the random message here In the asks, it's ok if you don't see this or answer it since you probably got a lot already and I understand if you don't see this!/gen

But first of all, I just wanna say

I CANT BELIEVE I HAVENT WATCHED YOUR ANALYSIS VIDEO SOONER IM SO FUCKING LATE MAN

It's so well done and so fucking funny, I was literally smiling and cackling through the whole thing, it's shocking how similar our humor is

NOT TO MENTION THE END SCENE AREE YOU KIDDING HOW DID YOU MATCH THE LYRICS SO PERFECTLY TO THE FUCKING LORE ITS INCREDIBLE 😭💜/GEN, POS

It's insane how much dedication is put into it, let alone singlehandedly feeding turbo fans as myself

Genuinely thought it's so nice seeing more content for a hyperfixation I've had since 2012, and the fandom coming back along with this video Genuinely brings me so much joy as someone who's loved this movie since I was a kid

Sorry for the ramble but genuinely thank you for making that video, I can't wait to see what other stuff you do, wreck it ralph or not I WILL be tuning in/gen, pos

Okay second of all

The main reason why I'm sending this is because of sometning I noticed while rewatching a scene in the movie

Now, this might be me over analyzing as I usually do but it feels TOO. OBVIOUS.

SO

IN the kart bakery scene where vanellope and ralph go to bake a kart, they obviously make their way into the building and into the main room

You see all the Karts of course, and It pans to the one vanellope chooses

Which, at first glance you wouldn't really pay too much attention, especially when watching it for the first time, she's just picking the model she likes

..but looking back at the scene

Vanellope's kart model, how it was supposed to look, looks very

Familiar

Because the kart she chose..

...is a red and white kart

With stripes down the middle, with a very similar shape to a..certain persons kart. Now this might just be nothing, it's probably just like I said, and over analysis on my part

But the kart the chose looks WAY too similar to turbo's, not to mention the stripe is down the middle, just like turbo's car on the cabinet art of him

And vanellope could've chosen ANY kart

But it was that specific kart she chose, out of any of the karts

Not to mention in some of vanellope's concept art...

(Art made by Lorelay Bove)

..Vanellope's concept design and turbos designs strike SCARILY uncanny resemblances to each others designs

From the helmet and colors

All the way down to her GOGGLES having the SAME. YELLOW. TINT. that candy's have in the movie, which have the same effect here. There's no way that this didn't have the intent to mirror turbo purposefully

So with that in mind, the kart vanellope chose in the kart bakery scene being turbo foreshadowing, wouldn't be too out of place, nor would it be too far off

Turbo's foreshadowing was always prominent, even in the smallest details you wouldn't focus on, just like he's infecting this world as a virus, little by little, everywhere. You. Turn.

Aaaand that's basically all I have to really say

Sorry for the long ramble, I've been thinking of submitting this for awhile now, especially after I told a friend about this and they mentioned that this should be submitted to you

So I decided to go ahead and just do it, no matter how wild my comparisons might sound-

Anyways, I hope you have a good day, night, or what time it may be, and keep being awesome! I can't wait to hear back if you see this! Bye-bye! ❤️🏎🏆

P.s

I've been quoting these since I watched the video and haven't stopped

Thanks for destroying my humor even more-/pos

Okay bye bye now-

-skitters away-

NO YOU'RE SO FUCKING RIGHT OH MY GOD VANELLOPE WAS ALWAYS A TURBO PARALLEL??? CHAT IS THIS TRUE. IVE NEVER SEEN THAT CONCEPT ART OF HER TEEHEE THANKS FOR SHARING

also God. This is 99% just a coincidence with zero merit because its such a common gesture- but Ralph and Vanellope doing their thumbs up.. maybe Turbo parallels ?? and like the EXACT same poses too:

Vanellope having one hand on the steering wheel and the other doing a thumbs up while facing the camera.

Ralph hunched over doing the double thumbs up with the visor tinting his face yellow. EXCUSE ME HMMM?? WHAT THE FUCK??

NOW COULD I BE CHERRY PICKING? PERHAPS. but when Turbo has barely a minute of screentime, there's not a lot i can pick from, and things SURE ARE LINING UP... (I'm cherry picking)

SO SHHHHHH... ❤️❤️❤️❤️ LET ME HAVE MY LITTLE CONSPIRASCY

[nobodysuspectsthebutterfly]

Thoughts about the supposed direction Rhaena's storyline is going in Hotd and the apparent Nettles erasure? Disappointing but... I can sort of see where they could take it? Idk... looking at grrm's posts in hindsight kinda makes me even more disappointed if he is as well (he just can't get his adaptations right atp but idk)

Well. Pre-ep7, we're still pending any Rhaena-Sheepstealer bonding, but I'm basically 😑🫠 about the rumors. (I dislike borrowing trouble, I'm not even sure how many of the rumors are true -- actually I'm pretty sure many of these supposed "leaks" are straight up lies -- and yet. Still *disgruntled meh* and *"we're all fine-everyone's fine here" dread*.) Rhaena is one of my more beloved F&B characters (it's the Sansa parallels, I can't help myself), and Nettles has been a super fave since TPATQ and TWOIAF. (Particularly TWOIAF, since the Burned Men fire-witch reveal; heck, I think my little dollmaker is still one of the few fanarts of Nettles in the mountains.)

I mean, sure, I understand that Rhaena's book storyline during the Dance, where she's offpage from basically the start of the war until nearly the end of it, socializing in the Vale and waiting for her egg to hatch, would be difficult to adapt in an action-oriented visuals-oriented television show. (Like Rhaenyra this season sure isn't just catatonically crying from Luke's death until Jace's.) And I'm glad Rhaena's getting more to do, and I'm glad it's directly addressing her feeling slighted and ignored by her family since she doesn't have a dragon. However...

I do not want Rhaena merged into one character with Nettles! I do not want Rhaena to have Sheepstealer and not her hope-for-the-future (doomed hope, and yet) baby dragon Morning, that hatched for her. Also note how pink Morning, worn as a fashion accessory, so suited Rhaena's coquette personality vs her sporty, adventurous twin sister... I mean, I've said before, I understand adaptations can be different, this still wouldn't make HOTD even close to a "loose adaptation".* But I do not want this adaptation to lose Rhaena's personality that I loved.

Or for that matter, to lose Nettles's character, and her importance to the themes and worldbuilding of ASOIAF. (See also.) And her importance to the plot -- but god knows, they're doing all sorts of things with Daemon and Rhaenyra on this show, toxic romance or what have you, who knows if once Daemon reaches his emotional breakthrough or whatever at Harrenhal this season, if they want to backslide him into a cheating plot in S3 while Daemon is again stuck in a castle for months.** Nevertheless, I'd be deeply disappointed to lose scenes like "as well as her dragon, the girl had taken to riding Daemon", or the last morning in Maidenpool scene... and um, you can't really fit Rhaena in there, or if you did, it would certainly put the lie to the ship denialists' "he just treated her like a father, platonically bathing naked together!" (Also the pretty blatant fake S3 leaks including one where Rhaenyra decides Rhaena has betrayed her... are pretty blatantly fake, sorry.)

And then there would be the frankly racist erasure of the one book black character. "Oh but the show made the Velaryons black, so it's not erasing, it's adding more!" No, sorry. (1) I was and am all for adding more racial diversity to the show and especially to Valyrians, but face it, when you take the book's secondary character Velaryons, two who get killed off early and are portrayed as lesser to the "true" Daemon/Rhaenyra marriage, and make them black, you've already done a lot of hinky damage there. (2) What, it's that hard to write three distinct black girls with very different personalities and one from an incredibly different background? I don't see Addam and Alyn getting merged. I don't see Aemond and Daeron getting merged. I don't see Hugh and Ulf getting merged. But I'm not really one to speak here, for this particular discussion I'd point you to @ride-thedragon and @venusintheblindspots-blog and @chrkrose, among others, they have many many posts on this subject in far greater detail and better argued than mine.

OK, so. I still have hope that Nettles -- even if not cast for this season (sorry y'all, that extra is an extra) -- may appear next season, and all this worry will turn out to be a tempest in a teapot. Per last report from the HOTD panel at SDCC, the rumor of Rhaena and Sheepstealer definitely doesn't happen in ep 7, though, yes, there's one episode after. And if it does happen... I'll be strongly disappointed. Deeply, deeply disappointed, and probably far more suspicious of future adaptational changes. But, for me at least, it's not a dealbreaker like GOT S5 was.*** I won't be happy at all about the storyline, but I would like to think the show will remain high quality re themes and character and all. Time will tell, though. Time will definitely tell.

As for GRRM, when his complaints seem to be "wild dragons shouldn't be in the Vale" and "the heraldry with four legs is wrong", well, I struggle to see that he's that disappointed in the adaptational changes. Believe me, I am well used to reading between the lines re GRRM and adaptations, something like the fact that he's not visiting the HOTD writers' room when he's in the UK is nothing. Catch me if at Worldcon or his Oxford lecture in August, GRRM again says that he could write a whole novel about Nettles, or if actually says something about non-Valyrian dragonriders, ok?

*I was just reading up on The Beast (2023) vs Henry James's “The Beast in the Jungle”. lol HOTD doesn't compare. Don't even think it, man.

**You know, this reminds me of how the Dance in F&B is not paced very well for individual characters, they keep going offscreen for months at a time. From shortly after Rhaenyra's crowning to the Fall of KL, Daemon just sits at Harrenhal and occasionally ventures out into the riverlands. From shortly after the Fall of KL until the Battle Above the Gods Eye, Daemon just... sits at Maidenpool and occasionally ventures out into the riverlands (with Nettles). Yeah, obviously a show would need to write more for him to do, he's a main character.

***Thank god HOTD isn't the sort of exploitative shitshow that GOT was. All y'all thinking it was a better adaptation because of your nostalgia goggles (and/or shitty memory) need to actually reread the books (especially AFFC/ADWD) and then submit yourself to the real-world misogynist and homophobic nonsense of S5-6 again, ugh.

[charismaofobedience]

what makes you think mikoto is good rep? specifically, what is it about double that convinces you?

Okay okay, it took me some time to perfectly articulate my thoughts on how MIkotos system isn't horrible rep and instead was tackled... Somewhat well? This was also written after me and another friend who's a system discussed this extensively and how our own situations lowkey match the situation Mikoto himself is facing. Under the cut because I did *not* expect this to get so long </3

To start it off with some debunking of things people have been mentioning as "oh but this proves he's not a system" (after Milgram itself confirmed them as one but oh well), the whole thing on how DID only appears during childhood isn't... Really the full truth? The most common thing to happen with DID is, instead, for someone to develop the conditions for it through their childhood, but the symptoms only start showing when older. I myself was a case of that and while it started around my 6 years, we only had our first split at 14. Mikotos just happen to be later. I personally also think that, during the phone call with his mom, there wouldn't just have a random baby crying noise for no reason. He probably developed it that early, but just didn't split until recently, however that's just my own reading and not anything confirmed.

For the point of "but then, why don't the milgram rules work on John if he is indeed the killer? This proves it's Mikoto who killed", just look at irl court cases of systems. The one being judged will always be the host almost all the times, after all, he's the main one who fronts, and not whichever alter committed the murder. The host and body would be the one in jail etc in a real life prison, not the alter who committed it. Milgram is a perfect parallel to that, with Mikoto being restrained and the Es barrier working on him even if he didn't commit any murder while John, the alter and one who committed the crime, doesn't has any restraints or barrier that work on him. Because Mikoto is the host and core of their system, not John.

Second, some quick system terminology. I'll be using the terms host, protector/persecutor and dormancy on this, so for a quick understanding: Host means that, basically, that alter is the one who mainly fronts and takes care of things, may or may not be the core ("original" person), but at Mikotos case I'll assume he's both the core and the host. Protector is what the name implies, they're alters who have as their purpose to protect the system and body. Persecutors just so happen to be protectors who have more drastic means to do things and will inherently be harmful to the system in a way in another, they are not necessarily bad, and might instead just be misguided and think what they are doing is a solution for a issue and that by doing so they're protecting the system. Finally, dormancy is when an alter of a system... Well, goes into dormancy. They can't come to front anymore and will be "asleep" for some time or even forever depending on the conditions. A inclusion is also possible, where two alters (or more) will become one etc, but I don't think that will be the case for Mikoto.

So, as it's settled, Mikoto is the Host and Core of the system and Orekoto/John is the Protector/Persecutor of it. Let's get to the explanation now.

Mikoto's split seemingly very much occurred due to the stress situation he had been feeling from his work. We have John welcoming him home twice through the mv and noticing that Mikoto isn't smiling or anything when coming home anymore and it isn't the only times judging by the "another day" mention. We can see on the second one he's either getting the subway to go home or go to work (probably the first one), but on the first time it's said we get to see Mikoto's phone and, specifically, messages coming through and through.

All the texts are coming from his boss, and from the looks of it Mikoto works for a black company in Japan, so it's no wonder he's stressed and very clearly depressed there. Judging by the time Mikoto would be going back home at midnight and, at that time, he's texted by his boss that he needs to remake a whole product and correct mistakes from another thing for the next day of work, and with "next day" you can bet they mean "when i see you in around 10 hours". For now, this is the main reasoning and sustenance we have for "but why did he split?", aka, Mikoto was under a lot of stress on work and it lingered even when he was home to the point that, eventually, John split as himself and, as himself said, he's got Mikoto, and he could leave it all to him.

By this point I like to think it was already John fronting to reply to the boss call. John got tired of Mikoto overworking himself to the brink of breaking down to appease to his boss and superiors and, wanting to help, came to front to "take it all on" in his own words. I think bringing MeMe up for Double discussion is extremely important because we have to remember that MeMe was visibly only from Mikoto's point of view while in Double we have John telling his own point of view. I don't think Mikoto is lying about not knowing he's a system etc, but instead that Mikoto thinks something is wrong, yes, that he knows whoever this person ruining his life is both not him and him at the same time (mirror scene), but isn't aware exactly that he's a system. John is portrayed as scary and evil and cruel etc in MeMe because that's what Mikoto assumes to be happening, Mikoto doesn't know whatever John is doing and what are his intentions, we knew since them Mikoto is the type of guy to take things happening to him lightly (joking about the milgram situation etc) because he may think he deserves it, and this extended to his work and personal life. Through MeMe we see Mikoto looking sad and not smiling anytime until we got to the ending in the headspace where he's sitting on the couch somewhat smiling, but not looking downright miserable like he is in double because Mikoto's main focus was that there is some scary guy there, not that his work life was putting him under so much strain to the point of splitting. Hell, his work life was never brought up until Double anyways, because Mikoto didn't think it was important and kept playing as if it was cool (even during the call with his mom in Double, as John showed us) and that he could handle it, meanwhile Double has John showing us just how miserable Mikoto looked after work and some situations that would happen on his day to day work, how he never went back home smiling etc. MeMe has a bigger focus on Mikoto, as a Host, not knowing that he's a system and how scary that can feel when you're fully unaware of why you're seemingly doing certain actions that you're not aware of when they're brought up to you, meanwhile Double focuses on his alter, John, telling us about his own motivations and the truth about Mikoto's daily life, showing us that whatever it is he did was to protect Mikoto because being a protector is his role in the system. Mikoto didn't take his issues seriously in MeMe, and in Double John gives us a glimpse on how bad it was. For Mikoto, all of his personal issues were coming from the fact that there was an Evil Scary Serial Killer guy around, while John tells us that nuh uh, it was capitalism all along and he'll protect Mikoto from that stress.

The voice drama also tracks some of these points, such as Es mentioning that Mikoto laughs whenever he's troubled and rarely gets angry or frustrated, ignoring problems, and Es mentioning that John acts more rationally, contrary to what he expected... After all, Es' only views of John came from MeMe as a mv, and then from John getting angry and frustrated as Es because, in the beginning, to John it all felt like people were trying to trouble and hurt Mikoto yet again. He was just doing his job as a protector.

I've seen most people say that the "made me a scoundrel" refers to us, the viewers, but also... I feel it might also just be John talking with Mikoto himself. Mikoto saw John as a evil bad alter on MeMe as we just discussed, and from what we see here... Yes, John is violent and impulsive, but he's still a protector who did things with the goal of "I need to protect Mikoto" in mind. We didn't knew that through the entirety of MeMe because Mikoto himself didn't know, and John might be frustrated that the guilty verdict could have come only because Mikoto portrayed himself in such a way first and foremost. John asks him why he's crying because I'm fairly sure he isn't aware that Mikoto isn't aware of him either. The main issue at play here is the fact their system communication is horrible if not non existent. They can't communicate with each other properly for some reason even through writing etc, so there's no way for them to be certain of how the other feels. There's no way for Mikoto to know why John was doing all that. There's no way for Mikoto to know John was trying to protect and help him.

John in the middle of Double even states that he doesn't know why he's there. So yes, most of us are all assuming it was all due to Mikoto's stress with work, but hell we could all be wrong because, again, Mikoto refuses to open up and actually talk about issues with anyone. "Come to know me as an honest man" is John asking for all of us and Es to go and know him as himself, as John the alter, and not the vision Mikoto had of him on MeMe and the entirety of trial one. Because yes, you can't change the violent nature of his, but we should at least come to know and understand that he is a protector and was simply trying his best to protect Mikoto from something (what? We don't know and can't be sure, but yet again, our best bet for now is his job). John is seemingly willing to open up more this trial, admitting he is indeed the one who committed the murder and asking Es to understand the situation they're being put under, with Mikoto feeling stressed and please forgive him, because Mikoto is not the one who committed the murders. I'm sure we will get more on their situation etc when the questions for Mikoto and Kotoko come, but for now we only have that.

John simply wished to save and protect Mikoto, he himself doesn't know how it all ended like *this* (Mikoto as guilty and not innocent, running away from him on the train because, again, Mikoto isn't aware John is simply trying to help him). Having John asking us to forgive Mikoto many times through both the mv (first image of these 3) and voice drama (next screenshot) basically affirms his beliefs and wishes, that he wants us to guilt him, but not Mikoto. After all, if we get another guilty verdict? In his own words Mikoto will go into dormancy due to the stressful situations of having two guilty verdicts in a row, but if Mikoto gets a innocent this time around? Then, there will be less need for John to front... After all, if the situation becomes a bit more calming for them, then John's purpose of protecting Mikoto will be gone for some time... What we can't have, however, Is Mikoto going into dormancy and then forcing John as the new host, because John wouldn't know what to do by then. He was born to be a protector and his identity is intrinsically connected to this role, the duty of protecting Mikoto, for him, comes above him as his own person. With Mikoto's dormancy, John himself would lose his purpose and motive of existing.

And even so, John apologizes at the end of the milgram, questioning even his own existence that "none of this wouldn't have happened if I wasn't even born". In John's eyes, he failed on his role of a protector by getting Mikoto into this situation. The protector guilt is shown so greatly on John that I did tear up a bit when first watching the Double mv and reading the lyrics. The fact they expanded away from the "scary evil alter" troupe that Mikoto made us belief in trial 1 into a protector/persecutor who feels guilt that his actions caused harm to the host? Into a protector with low empathy who cares more for the well being of their host than his own? Mikoto was neutral on the scale of "is this good system rep" for me initially because, again, Mikoto himself didn't know he was a system. Now we got more information on how things work thanks to John and, from the feelings of how scary finding out there's someone else besides you to the fear of realizing that the person who did whatever the hell it was wasn't you mentally, but it physically was you at the same time is terrifying. I think their writing was very well handled to cover the topics of fear and guilt from both sides. Mikoto is still a host who's unaware of the fact he's a system. John is a protector who feels like he failed on his role after getting Mikoto into this mess. Their communication, due to seemingly being a recent split, is non existent so they cant fully talk with each other to comprehend the other. To me, this is a perfect example of how it felt when I myself found out I wasn't a singlet. I don't think Mikoto's writing is perfect and has no flaws, not at all, but on the grander scale of things? Having this type of rep coming from a japanese song media franchise is great and almost unseen since it's mostly always used as a joke or for the scary evil alter trope alone. Milgram and the team could do some stuff better, sure, but from what we have right now? It's far from me of calling them "bad system representation". After all, just like John tells Mikoto, they're both doing their best.

[gottagobackintime]

I find it fascinating to witness the straight audience of any media not being able to pick up what the makers of the movie/show puts down.

It’s like when people reacted to the “You wear fine things well” scene in Our Flag Means Death with “aw, they’re such good friends” whereas the queer audience went “omg, this is happening”. We all had access to the same scene, we’d all watched the build up to that scene but the straight audience wrongly read it as friends/straight whereas the queer audience had suspected they were building up to a romance but this was the confirmation. Even the creator of the show was baffled that people were surprised that Ed and Stede fell in love. Because he thought they had made it obvious.

And as I said, we, the queer audience picked up on it. And I feel like the same thing is happening with Ted Lasso. Do I know that Ted and Trent will get together? No, I am unfortunately not a writer on Ted Lasso. But you can’t deny that there are clues pointing to it. But the straight audience barely pick up the fact that Ted and Trent like each other, be that in a platonic way or romantic way. I’ve seen several reactions to the last episode of season 2 and ONE of them included the scene where Ted reacts to Trent not being in the press room. All of them severely cut down the scene in the parking lot. One of the scenes most of us Ted/Trent truthers point to as a huge piece of evidence for it going canon. The parallel of them meeting in an empty parking lot, just like Ted and his ex-wife and Roy and Keeley. But because Ted and Trent are both men it couldn’t possibly mean anything. And Ted has an ex-wife and a kid so he can’t possibly be into men, as if there is no such thing as being bisexual. “But I’m pretty sure Trent has a family, he has a kid right?” So? He could be divorced, we also have no idea if his daughter has another dad or a mum. And the same thing applies to him, it doesn’t mean he can’t be into men (take also into account all of James Lance’s interviews, and his choice of shirt in one of them, friend of Dorothy anyone? He's the captain of this ship, we're just along for the ride tbh.)

Then we have the wonderful “I’m so not homophobic, in fact, you are homophobic because you think Ted is gay just because he likes musicals and has ‘feminine’ traits” um no… it’s the fact that he kind of acts in a way that an ally wouldn't. Yeah, he called himself an ally in that one episode. But every single person who is now out as queer who at one point considered themselves an ally because "I’m not one of them but I sure think they're neat" raise a hand 🖐️ (been there, done that. Was very into queer things before I realised I myself am one of them). What it always comes down to is "it's pandering", "it's tokenism" (having the main character on the show be queer wouldn't be fucking tokenism), "not everything has to be gay", "why can't men just be friends, there is a severe lack of male friendships on tv". And like the last one makes me go??? There are a MILLION friendships between men on TV. There are even multiple friendships between men in Ted Lasso. Beard and Ted, Ted and Higgins, Ted and Roy, the himbos and so on. Having Ted and Trent become a couple wouldn't really change anything because there are still friendships between men. They also claim that Ted is needed as the "straight without toxic masculinity" representation. As if Beard isn't right there. The man who has no problem going to an immersive show about the menstrual cycle. Has no problem with shrieking when he's surprised and so on.

I also like that if we'd get Ted and Trent together, we'd get two middle aged queer dads. Which isn't that common. It's not even super common to see people realising they're queer late in life on TV, and yet it happens every day. Because let's face it, most queer men on TV kind of look like Colin, and I don't mean that as a bad thing. And I'm looking forward to his storyline. But it's also nice seeing middle aged or old people finding themselves and being allowed to be who they are (see Ed and Stede from OFMD). Also would enjoy seeing people lose their minds when they realise they've been fooled this entire time. It'll be like Black Sails all over again.

I do not have any doubts about the fact that, had Trent or Ted been a woman and they saw Trent give up his career because of Ted's influence, they sure as hell wouldn't protest people thinking they'd become a couple. But because it's two men it's just delusional for some reason (homophobia).

What I'm saying is, it's clear that the straight audience has a hard time picking up subtext and clues that the makers are planting. Because they've never had to do that. Because they are always clearly represented. They don't have to look for minor side characters and hope that they might be queer. Because the main character is straight and most of the supporting cast too. When you've grown up with a lack of representation or with representation that is meant to be subtext, you'll learn to pick up on it. And you do look at media differently. I just wish that the straight audience could listen to us for once, without getting defensive and dancing around the fact that they are uncomfortable relating to a character that turned out to be queer.

[telomeke]

Get to Know Me Tag :)

I was tagged by @lamonnaie at this post here. Thanks for tagging me! 😍 It was such fun to read your responses; now here are mine. 🥰

do you make your bed?

Never ever. I'm pretty messy, and if I don't watch my hoarding tendencies I will morph into the worst pack rat. But I like a bit of clutter around me; I think it helps my creative side since my output (whether at work, or writing on Tumblr) is always tidy and tidied up to a fault, which can stifle creativity (at least that's what I tell myself! 🤣).

what's your favourite number?

Don't have one. However (even though I like to think I'm not superstitious) if I can I'll try to avoid the number 13 and anything with 4 in it...

what is your job?

Not gonna get too specific, but my work involves design, project management and construction.

if you could go back to school, would you?

I was too stressed out at school to want to repeat the experience. But I wouldn't mind a bit of time travel back to advise my younger self not to take things so seriously! 🤣

can you parallel park?

Yes. Not well, but the car will be fully in the lot eventually. 👍

a job you had that would surprise people?

Some minor modeling jobs when I was younger. Hush! I don't like to talk about it. 🤫 You wouldn't think it to look at me now (me 🤝 Ricky Gervais 😂).

do you think aliens are real?

There are too many planets out there for our little blue marble to be the only habitable one, so yes I do think there are aliens out there. I just don't think we've been visited by them yet though! (Aylin doesn't count. 🤩)

can you drive a manual car?

Yes. Mom taught me how to drive in one... until the day I jammed on the accelerator when she said "Step on it" and I almost up-ended us into a ditch. Then I was sent to driving school instead. 🤣

what's your guilty pleasure?

Ooh. It's this bad boy here:

Sadly I've been over-indulging, so chocolate is now banned from the house for the foreseeable future. I'm still lusting after it though. Other guilty pleasures: I do like a good nightcap, so any (gluten grain-free) alcohol makes me light up – cognac, cabernet, sherry, sake, port... (But I don't always know my limits, so this is now banned too.) And a steamin', stonkin', trashy BL every now and then (bonus if there's a nice muscley actor for me to get all googly-eyed over – shoutout Gap Jakarin!). 😁🥰

tattoos?

I like art and have fanboyed over beautiful tattoos before – but I'm put off by the permanence of them, so I have none myself. Don't like the idea of not being able to change them much once they're inked in, because I will always be wanting to change things up if I were to get one. And no, even for looking at I prefer an uninked bod over an inked one. It takes a lot of work to get a body in shape, and I can't understand someone wanting to cover up the results of their hard work at the gym. 🤷‍♂️

favorite color?

A deep, rich blue most of the time. But when the mood hits, I like a bright, bold red too.

favorite type of music?

My tastes are a bit eclectic, leaning lighter and not challenging. Anything with a strong melodic line will get me hooked. Bonus points if the lyrics can come together with the melody to tell a story, and elevate it even more. So – pop mostly, but I also like R&B, soul, light jazz and the odd heartfelt country ballad or foot-stomper (go Queen Bey! 😍). Also like things with a nostalgic bent (I melt at Karen Carpenter, Seals & Croft, and England Dan & John Ford Coley). And then throw in a couple of show tunes in there for good measure! My YouTube playlist is all over the place – Sheila Majid, New Country, Renaissance, Nunew, Miley Cyrus, Streisand, Li'l Nas X, Ayumu Imazu, The Carpenters, Clean Bandit, so many others, all side-by-side.

do you like puzzles?

I love them, especially word and logic puzzles. I'm always shouting over Pat and Vanna. 🤣

any phobias?

Oddly, not the usual suspects, but I'm a bit phobic about birds. They're just creepy up close, even though I find them fascinating and beautiful with a bit of distance. While the bog-standard creepy-crawlies don't bother me one bit – I'm the one always getting called in to whack the roaches and chase away rodents. I dream of getting a cobalt blue tarantula as a pet (but that's not going to happen for various reasons, alas).

favorite childhood sport?

I wasn't that sporty growing up (classic bookworm) but I did enjoy a bit of soccer when I got to play. But I guess my favorite was probably swimming, though I didn't compete.

do you talk to yourself?

All the time. There's a nonstop monologue going on in my head and I've been known to startle people by accidentally voicing that conversation out loud. So I've learnt not to do it around others. 🤣 And no I'm not hearing disembodied voices; it's just me keeping myself company (plus I find it helps me focus my thoughts).

what movies do you adore?

My all-time favorite: Cinema Paradiso; it really pulls unabashedly at the heartstrings, but then again I'm a sentimental fool and love it all the more for that. That's also why I like Love Actually, especially the scene where the repressed Jamie (Colin Firth) travels to Portugal in order to confess his feelings to Aurélia (Lúcia Moniz), having realized he loves her despite the language barrier, and doggedly learnt Portuguese just to make his declaration – and then he finds out that she, lovelorn and bereft, learnt English just in case ("just in cases") he came back. 💖 And my second favorite is from the other end of the spectrum, actually quite a bit before my time as well: Hello Dolly! 😆 Don't judge... A couple of songs in there are really amazing – Love is Only Love and Just Leave Everything to Me especially (which are not in the stage version) are mindblowingly good. The former is almost pithy in its bare-boned purity, all about looking at love without sentimentality while reprising themes heard earlier on in the musical; the latter has the among the cleverest lyrics set to music I've ever heard:

Streisand is in fine fettle portraying a campier, more youthful incarnation of Dolly. Such a shame it was not better received. The costumes are spectacular too.

coffee or tea?

Coffee (or rather the caffeine it contains) is my drug of choice, and I drink buckets of it. But I like a good cuppa when I'm feeling nostalgic and/or sentimental, because tea is what I drank a lot of growing up – at my gran's there would be a perpetually-replenished, giant kettle of dark, bitterish Oolong on the sideboard for whenever you felt like some (which was often), while at home there was always a big pot of tea on the table in the morning, that would then be set to chill in the refrigerator after breakfast. I would always have an ice-cold milk tea with the papers when I got home from school, and it was my favorite daily ritual.

first thing you wanted to be growing up?

A paleontologist – like a lot of kids I loved dinosaurs, and I can still rattle off the names of the more well-known ones (including every one in Jurassic Park 👀). But that got pushed aside for more practical considerations later. Still wish I'd explored my second childhood ambition more though, which was to be a writer/journalist. Maybe that's why I like posting so much on Tumblr! 😍

Onward tagging (too many people as usual, but no pressure to play if you don't want to or can't 🥰): @hughungrybear, @relativelydimensional, @neuroticbookworm, @wen-kexing-apologist, @waitmyturtles, @airenyah, @twig-tea, @solitaryandwandering, @recentadultburnout, @lurkingshan, @grapejuicegay,@bengiyo, @urikawa-miyuki, @pickletrip, @suni-san, @kattahj, @dimplesandfierceeyes, @7nessasaryevils, @imminentinertia, @befuddledcinnamonroll, @pandasmagorica, @nihilisticcondensedmilk,@shortpplfedup, @rokklagio, @thegalwhorants, @brazilian-whalien52, @callipigio, @respectthepetty, @corettaroosa, @colourme-feral, @virtualtadpole, @aroceu, @belladonna-and-the-sweetpeas, @delesaria-blog, @dribs-and-drabbles, @inventedfangirling, @jiirotu, @visualtaehyun @happypotato48,@akawrites000, @kleopatras-cat, @dc-alves, @toschistation, @lovelyghostv

I've been tagged by others in various tag games over the past few weeks but have been too busy with work to be able to play. 😭 Not gonna post half-assed replies if I can help it, but then I'm always beset by dread thinking people might assume I'm ignoring them for whatever silly reason. But I just haven't had the time until now.

If you've tagged me and I've not responded, please know that I really wanted to but I just kept getting sidetracked by urgent deadlines. (In fact, my drafts folder is full of half-written tag game responses that are too far beyond their use-by date to ever see the light of day. 😮) So to any and all who see this, please accept my apology for not replying to your tags and invites, and if you'd like to play along with this one even if I haven't tagged you directly (and you have the time for it) – please do so! I'd love to read your responses! 😍

[vashtijoy]

I was wondering if it is possible that the surname "Akechi" is actually a pseudonym/alias . . . like, his celebrity name, and not the surname of his mother. I don't think the game ever hints at it but it came to me because Dietman and the Silent Requester uses the alias concept and my brain kinda automatically assumes everything in that mission has some kind of parallel to Akechi himself, and because it would make sense to use a different name (that he chose for himself) from his mother for his Detective Prince image, honestly. Do you think that's possible?

This is a fun one, but for myself, I think it probably isn't that likely. Ditto the idea that Akechi is mukoseki (essentially, unregistered at birth, which would have put him at a very significant disadvantage).

Akechi obviously has a life beside what we see. He's registered in high school and is participating in university entrance, all of which he might struggle to access if he was unregistered; he's presumably registered as "Akechi Goro" and not a second name unknown to us. He's remarkably high-achieving, which tells us that he hasn't just been parachuted into a (probably private, as he makes a big deal of earning his school fees) high school post-Shido; he was likely in a good middle school before that, through his own efforts. He tells us he obsessed about his grades so someone would want him. School will have been a big deal for him—up to a point.

He must have been registered with a doctor at some point, and so on. He will have taken standardised tests in elementary and middle school, and those tests will have needed a name, and have gone on file. By the point of canon, he's taken the national mock exams. By the time he's in high school, people do not know that he's an orphan, that he was an unwanted child, that he never had a father—he's successfully hidden it all. Which is a story in itself, if you ask me; a story which might suggest a successful change of identity—or simply that he got into private school, perhaps on a scholarship, and never told anyone his history. Yusuke mentions that his Kosei scholarship entitles him to a free place in a dorm; I like to think that Akechi, in middle school, may have benefited from something like this.

He also works in multiple fields—he must get paid by someone, even if Shido isn't paying him a yen. So he must have a bank account; he must pay tax on that income—two things Shido might certainly be able to help him with, if he saw fit. But even if Shido gave him the apartment he lives in and a credit card for his day-to-day expenses, there's still a lot going on, that that alias would have to take into account.

Shido is capable of a lot, but Akechi can't ask Shido for help establishing his anti-Shido alias; that would ruin the plot. He could, perhaps, strongarm people's shadows into doing things for him, changing things, forgetting him; we know he interrogates them. We never see him do any of that, but you could easily hypothesise it, and I wouldn't put it past him at all.

But in the days before the Metaverse, Akechi already has a lot of paperwork pointing to him; he's not a ghost, he hasn't fallen between the cracks; he's a boy with a life and a history. He's not somebody who can just start going by a different name—not without it raising questions, and drawing attention. Not without people looking up years later, when he's on TV, and saying "hey, that's <name>".

but mom

It seems to me that Akechi is just going by the same name he's had all along, perhaps because some part of him wants Shido to know who he is, perhaps because it's his mother's name, it's his name, and he doesn't want to cast it aside. But then why doesn't Shido recognise his name, like he recognises his face?

It's often said that Shido just doesn't remember people, but in fact he remembers Joker's name—he remarks on it when he sees the death certificate, though he doesn't know where he's heard it. He is doing the same thing Joker is, when he knows Shido's face, his voice, but can't place them.

My suspicion is that Shido just never knew Akechi's mother's name, and that Akechi knows that was the case, and why it would be the case. I think she was a sex worker all along, and that Shido was one of her clients; that, perhaps with the charm and cleverness her son would later show, she wormed her way into his good graces, as much of a mixed blessing as that would have been.

Akechi does not really say, for instance, that his mother and Shido "had a relationship"; he uses the word aijin, which is much more like a mistress, or plaything. Some boys at Shujin talk about how Shiho is going to be Kamoshida's next aijin after Ann. Shadow Okumura suggests to Cognitive Sugimura that he make Haru his aijin—"just take her as your lover". A couple of women on Harmony Alley laugh about becoming the aijins of politicians so they can be spoiled rotten. And Akechi says that his mother and Shido had an aijin kankei—an aijin relationship; she was his mistress, and when she became pregnant, she was dropped like a hot potato.

Akechi's mother might well have used a name that wasn't her own, for her work. She might well have gone only by a given name. That seems more likely to me than Akechi setting one up for himself.

is it a stagename?

One thing makes it very clear that "Akechi Goro" is not a stagename, even if it is an alias: Akechi is not famous at the start of canon, and so he has no need for a stagename. We watch the Detective Prince develop in realtime. And Sae, who's clearly known him awhile, knows him as Akechi; he hasn't adopted a different name for the screen.

could you do it anyway :|a

Absolutely. Go wild. You don't even have to think about this shit if you don't want to. That said, if I was writing this, I would probably face tweeny Goro with at least a few of these issues.

[cosmics-beings]

Are people seriously trivializing Starscream's treatment towards the Seeker twins? Starscream's first major appearance outside of his cameo in ‘Decoy’ had him shoving Novastorm out of the way to get the Allspark from Megatron, despite the fact that the action was completely unnecessary and counterproductive because it could have weakened Novastorm's hold on Megatron.

In the first few minutes of ‘What Dwells Within’ it is obvious that Starscream puts his safety before that of others and he even shoved Skywarp out of the way. The Seeker twins were shown to be becoming easily intolerant of Starscream's behaviour towards them, they even called him out for it! Once again, Starscream doesn't hesitate to run up ahead of the Seekers and the Malto's and we saw a crucial moment where the former actively choose to go a different route— this was a purposeful decision because naturally predators would go after a singular prey rather than a group. It's what Starscream would do.

Fortunately for Starscream, Hashtag is a good person and risks her own safety to help him (Jawbreaker, Mo and Robby also tried to go back but the door shut too quickly for them to follow), she argues that the others wouldn't have abandoned them and confronts Starscream about his treatment of others while also acknowledging his abuse. Seemingly, never having his abuse acknowledged or believed he then proceeds to step in front of Hashtag to protect her from what he thinks is the Dweller. His first selfless action. He then reacts in shock when he notices that the Seeker twins didn't leave. He expected the other Malto siblings to return but he was genuinely shocked that Skywarp and Nova Storm came back for him.

At the end of the episode Starscream departs with the two of them who were presumably waiting for him to talk with Megatron. While it is likely that "safety in numbers" also came into play, we saw that they were becoming intolerant of his treatment towards him and there would be no reason for them to stay with Starscream but in my opinion at least the show made it vaguely clear that Starscream is going to make amends for his behaviour and treat the Seekers twins better. I feel the need to point out that Starscream didn't want to go with Megatron (who treated him badly) because the latter made him feel unsafe but the Seekers (who were treated badly by Starscream) chose to remain with Starscream despite his treatment towards them. It felt like they were giving Starscream the opportunity to make amends and the show was leaning towards Starscream personally having to reconcile his relationship with the Seekers and how he treated people before facing Megatron in the future because it's definitely going to happen.

The irony is that to diminish how Starscream treated Skywarp and Novastorm, would be to diminish Starscream's character. He continued the cycle and almost definitely would have kept continuing it if Hashtag hadn't made him realize the error of his ways, much like Dot and Megatron— and that's the beauty of it! It's a parallel! Megatron saw Dot exhibiting compassion for his own soldiers and helping move his wounded, which made him realize his terrible and/or dismissive treatment towards them. While Starscream received compassion and understanding from Hashtag, making him realize he was doing the same thing as Megatron!

If Starscream can realize his treatment towards the Seekers twins wasn't good, then why can't the fans?

Honestly, as upsetting as it can be, I understand why. A lot of people, myself included are extremely protective of Starscream because Starscream's narrative has never taken this route. There has never once been a time when Starscream's abuse and trauma at Megatron's hands has been taken seriously to the point where he is defended. And not just defended, but the abuse is called out.

That said, I think that , after wanting that for so many years, a lot of people take any crtiqiue of how Starscream' treated people - especially the Seekers, as us saying a.) he deserved is abuse at Megatron's hands or b.) us saying that we don't believe what he went through. A lot of people are seeing any critique directed at Starscream and his treatment of others as an attack on his character because, like i mentioned before, it is the first time Starscream's abuse has ever been taken seriously, and hasn't ever been made a joke.

That said, while I understand and while in the past I admit, I have been like that (especially in regards to TFP Starscream, I used to be very upset when people would bring up how badly he treated Knockout, and called him abusive because it was hard for me to accept that Starscream himself was repeating the cycles of abuse. BUT to deny his treatment of Knockout would be unfair to both characters), I think that it is a huge disserivice to Starscream and the Seeker twins to say that Starscream didn't treat them poorly because it is canon. And talking about this doesn't diminish the abuse he went through, but it's also a point that was highlighted in the episode and during his conversation with Hashtag.

Because Hahstag mentioned it and called it out, and because aside from Starscream's abuse being properly addressed, the whole point of that episode was also to call out Starscream's actions and to stop him from perpetrating the same abuse that Megatron implemented on him. That is an integral part, and this also brings up a discussion about abuse victims and how fandoms tend to percieve valid abuse victims as always having to be these sweet, innocent perfect angels that can do no wrong, and if they aren't, then their abuse isn't valid or meant to be taken seriously.

Thats what I am seeing with Starscream.

Most people who are against holding Starscream accountable do not understand that abuse victims aren't always perfect. Abuse victims can be mean, they can be cruel, they can hurt others because of their trauma, and they can even start out as bad people before their abuse. Abuse victims aren't going to be innocent all the time, in fact, many times we aren't.

Even as a victim of abuse myself, I constantly find myself having to struggle with being violent or being manipulative because of what i've been through in the past (luckily, i am not violent at all but, i have to always deal with insturisve thoughts of violence because of my abuse!) That doesn't make me a bad person or mean that my abuse shoudln't be taken seriously.

Likewise we have Starscream - Starscream and I aren't the same with how we treat people at all, but a lot can seriously be said at the fact that no, Starscream isn't this sweet, innocent bean who has done no wrong. he has actually done a lot of wrong, and we even see--as you mentioned in Earthspark, he was not kind to the Seeker twins at all. In fact, he was cruel to them, wiling to let them die. He was not above physically hurting them whether it be pushing or shoving or even KICKING and if that is something that he's done constnatly, then yes, that is abuse and it is a cycle of repeated abuse.

And guess what? Despite what ive said above - that does not mean that Starscream's narrative of abuse is invalidated at all. Starscream is still a victim of abuse, Starscream still deserves healing, clarity, community and support. The thing fandom needs to understand is that bad people can be victims of abuse, and that doesn't mean they deserved their abuse at all.

In the same note, even Megatron HIMSELF is a victim of abuse and as we see, not only was a genocidal warlard, but because of his abuse he turned around and abused Starscream. And that said, Megatron still doesn't deserve the abuse he recieved, but at the same time he 100% is responsible for how he treated Starscream and needs to make up to him.

The cylce is literally repeated with Starscream.

Like you cannot watch the episode and see Hashtag call out Starscream and not think that he has to change, or that that was an important part. Starscream being compared to Megatron, is ABUSER and that being called out and highlighted is not something that can be ignored or talked away. That is an important part, for us to realize that Starscream has to change.

Because yes, Starscream goes through abuse in every continuity, but he also hurts other people and never changes, which has made it incredibly difficult for people to actually empahtsize with him. So if we are going to applaud Earthspark for how it handled his abuse, then we are going to have to also applaud it for the fact that unlike other continuities, Earthspark makes him change and makes him be held accountable while also validating his abuse.

Again, bad people can be abusers. that does not mean they deserve their abuse.

Lastly, I think we can't ignore that there is a lot of misogyny that plays into this. Because if we had guy!Skywarp and if Nova was a guy, then i don't think people would be passing off us talking about their mistreatment as 'babying' them. Fandoms, eps tf fandom, does this thing where they pretend to care about fembots, but then don't really give a fuck if they are treated bad by male characters and can easily write it off of make it funny. Or use their suffering as a way to woobify said male character.

This part you've said really makes sense to me: " The irony is that to diminish how Starscream treated Skywarp and Novastorm, would be to diminish Starscream's character. He continued the cycle and almost definitely would have kept continuing it if Hashtag hadn't made him realize the error of his ways, much like Dot and Megatron— and that's the beauty of it! It's a parallel! "

Because if Hashtag didn't say anything, he wouldn't have changed. And also, a huge aspect is that people mention that Skywarp and Nova stayed with Starscream so that had to mean he was treating them good, but that's not true. He is their leader, they have no choice BUT to follow him because they don't know anything else. So of course they're going to stay with him. In Dweller episode was quite literally when they made the choice to leave him, but only returned when they were with the Terrans.

Going back to your point is that Starscream had to change, because again, not all abuse victims are going to be perfect and healing from trauma if you've hurt people means humbling yourself, and admitting you've done wrong and hurt others. And we need to see him change, because if he changes and doesn't hurt others it MEANS that he is also healing and he is also growing and finding support.

And yes, as much as people don't like to admit it, Starscream and Megatron are parallels, they have been since IDW! The same way Megatron had to change, prove himself, and protecting those he hurt (albeit my man has a loong way to go with Starscream), Starscream has to do the same with his trine but also others he's hurt as well.

WHEW I just agree with most of what you said, and it just highlights why I am so attached to Starscream, because I see myself in him.

And i apprecaite that his narrative of abuse is complex. I just wish fandom understood that abuse victims aren't always going to be these perfect people, because when you do that you make it very difficult for various abuse victims to be heard. And a lot of these idea perpetrate into real life.

[hyenahunt]

Obbligato: Epilogue - 1

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Characters: HiMERU, Tatsumi

Proofreading: Remi (JP) & honeyspades (ENG)

Translation: Peace

HiMERU: (I believed every one without question, priding myself in having such a wonderful little brother — in Kaname — without a second thought.)

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Time: Present day.

Location: On the stage for the filming of COMP's promotional video performance

HiMERU: ( — My warning came too late.)

(We vastly underestimated the resentment of the Non-Special Students, who had been persecuted at the time.)

HiMERU: (I wish I could rationalize why, say that I wasn't able to read the air as well as I should've been able to due to being unable to do much from my base abroad...)

(But if I had truly wished to protect my brother, protect Kaname, then I would have been there for him.)

(He is my family — I should have dropped everything to be at his side. Sooner, before everything came to an end.)

(I will always regret not doing so.)

HiMERU: (I believed every word of my brother's reports, even though we hadn't interacted before then.)

(I vainly assumed that, because he was my brother, that he would be just as brilliant as myself.)

(However, Kaname was the opposite. Every step was a misstep and, not wanting to be scolded, he covered each one well.)

(Everything he said to me was nonsense, merely dressed up to appear otherwise.)

HiMERU: ("This job was a huge success!" "I'm flawless, without parallel." "Nothing's wrong." — He'd repeat these claims over and over again, but every one was a lie.)

(A lie a desperate child might make so that his guardian wouldn't abandon him.)

(I couldn't see through those lies. I believed every one without question, priding myself in having such a wonderful little brother — in Kaname — without a second thought.)

(I will always regret not doing so.)

(I was an idiot.)

Tatsumi: In thinking over the memories we're to speak on for COMP once more—

There's hardly anything we can record, isn't there?

HiMERU: You knew that from the start, Tatsumi.

An unbelievably cruel social disparity. Rampant discrimination, bullying rife with violence — a thriving cult-like group who called the catacombs home.

And at the end of everything, a riotous fight broke out.

There is not a single thing in those memories we could boast about to society. No, not a single person would want to enroll in Reimei Academy if they heard of it.

Tatsumi: There were happy, fun moments as well, as few as they were.

Certainly, those days were my youth.

HiMERU: Prettying it up with cathartic words like "youth" won't change the fact it was Hell.

Additionally, that incident that ended your youth — it absolutely can't be publicized.

It has already been dismissed as a simple scandal, a story long forgotten.

There is no one who'd like to dig it up now.

Tatsumi: You know, I always wondered about what happened at the end. I still don't quite understand it to this day.

— "Do you remember that Akehoshi?"

The day that HiMERU-san and I formed our unit, a video with that mysterious line began to play in the auditorium.

HiMERU: It reminds HiMERU of the past SS. No, perhaps they used that video once more as it proved successful in destroying your rebellion.

Even in death, “that Akehoshi” keeps on causing problems for the industry. No wonder he’s a taboo subject.

Tatsumi: You mustn't speak ill of the dead. There are no religious connections to that, it's simply human decency.

Tatsumi: In any case, once that video began to play, the Non-Special Students who had gathered climbed the stage in a frenzy.

Then, before we could stop them, they cursed HiMERU-san and began to assault him.

The teachers turned a blind eye. The Special Students, who were obliged to HiMERU-san and held him high as their representative, didn't help him either.

I thought such violence was wrong, and I went to stop them—

But I failed, and before I knew it they had struck me off the stage.

HiMERU: Mm. And the Special Students, who had thought you such an eyesore, took advantage of the situation and assaulted you as well.

It truly was a nightmare. A scene straight out of Hell.

Tatsumi: Yes. Naturally, I don’t like to recall what happened back then.

You and I were hospitalized, seemingly without any hope of recovery... It's a miracle we are able to stand here as we do today.

You especially, HiMERU-san, as I got off quite lightly compared to you.

HiMERU: Hmph. HiMERU is resilient, that's all.

HiMERU: (What a joke. Truthfully, the damage that was done to Kaname cannot be undone — he's still in the hospital to this day.)

(He remains in a near-comatose state, waking only to scream incoherently.)

HiMERU: (My little brother was destroyed, torn to shreds by hatred and brute force.)

(Trampled by idiots, he's still suffering in agony at rock bottom.)

(Even though he hadn't done anything wrong.)

[ ☆ ]

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[kiss-my-freckle]

Full Episode Commentary

2x5: Kill or Be Killed

Gif posts relevant to this re-watch:

Stelena's argument 1x4 parallels

They open this episode with a flashback of Mason. Katherine pushed him to trigger his werewolf gene, and she did this similar to the way Damon set up Tyler's fight in 2x2. The important thing to know about this flashback of Mason and the truth of what Katherine did to him… is Damon's realization that he's no different than Mason. He ruined himself for her when he was just another toy. He's no different than Mason and Trevor. That's why Damon is done with Katherine. 2x1 was the full-blown scale of this realization, that's why he broke wide open and killed Jeremy. He didn't need Katherine to tell him that she faked her death for him to know that he died for nothing. Katherine levelled his ass. He became a vampire for nothing just as Mason became a werewolf for nothing. It was all for Katherine and whatever use she found in them. Damon's entire existence was a lie. So this is where things start to get interesting for Damon.

"He kept coming at me. He got in his head that I was sleeping with his girlfriend." Mason has absolutely no idea Katherine spearheaded his kill, but he is describing vampire compulsion while telling Tyler this story. Katherine not only got him to trigger his werewolf gene, she used his friend to do it. She had Mason killing his own friend in self-defense to trigger his gene. Like wow. She sent 26 of her friends to their deaths for the sake of faking her own, and she admits to doing it without blinking. She gets Mason to kill his friend in self-defense to trigger his werewolf gene. This woman is no joke. She doesn't care who they care about, she only cares about herself.

"On every full moon, I lose control. If I don't sedate myself and chain myself down, I'll kill anything in my path. You have to be careful. All it takes is an accident, a car wreck. Any death at your hands, and you'll have a lifetime of this. You don't want it Tyler, trust me."

So yeah, it's painful to watch Mason because you're getting Damon's truth at the same time. That's what makes this gorgeous. Damon has already reached this realization. Mason hasn't. Tyler continues to hide the moonstone because Mason lies like Stefan does. He's lying about why he wants the moonstone, so yeah… Tyler's keeping it for now. They cut to Jeremy and Elena. He's gonna be the reason Mason loses his moonstone because Tyler's gonna run his mouth to Jeremy. Jeremy and Elena are talking about Tyler being a possible werewolf. They don't know much about werewolves, so they're not sure what to think about him right now. Jeremy tells Elena it shouldn't be hard to figure out.

"There is no us. I said that I wouldn't keep things from you anymore. That doesn't mean that I want you involved in it. This is dangerous, Jeremy. You have to stay out of it, okay?"

What Elena wants and what Jeremy wants are two different things. This is "do as I say, not as I do" hypocrisy. That's why I love it when Jeremy leaves Elena's room just so Stefan can enter it. It's do as I say, not as I do hypocrisy. What Stefan and Elena are doing is dangerous. And if they think Katherine won't find out, they're nuts because she puts Stefan's stalking abilities to shame. She basically infiltrates Elena's house the way Damon infiltrated the council.

Stefan: Okay, how about this? Today, when we're fighting, if I say "I can't do this anymore, Elena", what I'll really mean is that I love you. Elena: And when I say, "Fine Stefan, whatever", well that means I love you too.

This scene of Stefan and Elena basically shows how most of their argument is real. Because yeah… the easiest way to fake an argument is to have a real argument. It feels less scripted that way. Look at me telling ya'll how to lie lol. They're basically pulling a Damon repeat through Katherine. When Jenna stabs herself, it parallels Damon force-feeding Elena his blood. "Fool me once, shame on you." Since I'm on the subject of lying, this is now the second season Stefan and Elena spend lying to someone. First season Damon, second season Katherine. So yes, Elena gets very good at lying. "You're gonna pretend to be a mother?" Caroline is such a bitch to her mother, but these are my favorite storylines for her… the ones with her parents. "You know, there's pretending to be a mother and then there's reality. Let's not push our luck, okay?" I can't believe this came out of her mouth. Like damn.

Whenever I consider Damon in his human life with Elena, I consider all of these Mystic Falls events. "I think you're the one that needs to watch his back." This scene Stefan has with Mason is similar to his scene with Logan. In threatening Damon, Mason threatened Stefan because they're brothers lol. Mason basically does to Stefan what Damon did to him. He shakes Stefan's hand, then prepares the attack… only Mason is intent on taking down both brothers. If he takes down Damon alone, he knows Stefan will kill him. That's why he involves Liz. Suddenly, the guy that doesn't involve himself in council business involves himself in council business to get rid of the Salvatores. Mason is actually risking himself in the process. All either of them have to do is open their mouths to Liz about him being a werewolf. Damon doesn't because he plans to kill Mason himself. The one thing you don't wanna do… is try to kill Damon's brother a second time and have him actually be there for it.

"Stefan, please tell me you don't seriously think a hand shake just solved our problem."

Stefan is pissed that he can't see Elena out in the open as he has been, that Katherine is affecting his relationship so much that he has to see Elena in secret. That's why he acts as if Katherine is Damon's problem when she isn't. Katherine forcing them to see each other in secret isn't Damon's problem. "So thank you, because we don't have enough problems." That's why I consider this comment from Stefan self-serving. Katherine isn't Damon's problem, and he's putting his issue with Katherine over Damon's issue with Mason. He doesn't care that Mason could kill them with a single bite so long as he can see his girlfriend out in the open, that's how ridiculous he is.

Katherine isn't Damon's problem. Not yet anyway. Stefan is just pissed that he can't see Elena out in the open. He's gotta be secretive about it. So what's gonna happen is Stefan is gonna help Damon with Mason and Damon is gonna help Stefan with Katherine. Then yeah… they're gonna combine for Jules to save Caroline. Damon doesn't consider Katherine his problem until she has Jenna stab herself. Then he's gonna be like… yeah, we gotta deal with her. Damon likes Jenna. I think it's her equal part responsible parent and equal part fun that he likes. Anyway, they're gonna switch. Damon will help Stefan with Katherine and Stefan will help Damon with the werewolves.

"Stefan, please tell me you don't seriously think a hand shake just solved our problem." I can't stop laughing at Damon. He knows.

They cut to Jeremy at the Grill. He's about to push the werewolf issue with Tyler. It's insane to me that Aimee considers Jeremy damaged goods. This girl knew Matt had a girlfriend and still chose to hit on him. And when Caroline showed up, she decided to make out with Tyler because she couldn't hook up with Matt. So no, I consider Jeremy too good for her. As I was saying about Mason… he treated Jeremy like a dick at the mayor's wake. He and Tyler were bonding over their dead fathers, and Mason totally interrupted. Now that Tyler is on the outs with Mason lying to him, Jeremy is about to get some intel. True as it should be, people prefer honesty. I feel that's ultimately why Mason blames himself for Tyler when he returns in Ghost World. He lies to Tyler the way Stefan lies to Elena. You don't get to pick and choose what truths to tell. You're either honest or you're not. Tyler hosts a four person party. Him, Jeremy, Aimee, and Sarah. Sarah is totally hitting on Jeremy.

I find it odd that neither brother thought to make a move with Mason despite knowing he'd try to kill them. They actually gave him time to make his own move. So because he's dealing with two vampires and it's not a full moon, he's involving Liz. "I just thought that we were stronger than that." Elena is hilariously lying, and I'm like... is your love strong enough that you're willing to lose your Aunt Jenna? If so, carry on. As much as I love Katherine in season 2, this entire storyline is too much teen drama for me. Fake fighting just so Mama Katherine can have her man all to herself? Come on, you're 500 years old. Just wait til Elena dies in the ritual, then you can have Stefan all to yourself. I have a seriously problem with teens acting this teenish because this 500 yo acts teenish.

Damon buys Liz's problem with Caroline, so he has no idea about her problem with him being a possible vampire. But it's a good way to separate the truth from the lies. This show gets pretty tricky in that department because Elena is carrying on two separate relationships with two brothers. Just as Stelena keeps secrets from Damon, Delena keeps secrets from Stefan. Different in the fact that Damon knows most of what's going on because he's not stupid. It's hard to keep anything from him. Yes, her and Caroline had a moment, but she's lying without lying because it's easier that way. She's basically hiding her moment with Mason behind her moment with Caroline. So you get this fake Stelena argument where most of it is real. It's the best way to lie as Liz just did to Damon. Because Damon had his own moment with Elena that Stefan doesn't know about, he picks up on it and lies to Stefan about how he knows. It's a bit hard to explain, but it's the reason Damon pulls two separate responses. I've included my Stelena argument gif post for this scene. Every scene in this episode has an opposite scene. Damon and Caroline are beautiful in this episode. They basically rehash their carnival moment.

Caroline tells Elena that talking to Stefan is a bad idea. It's a bad idea because of Katherine, but in choosing that moment to argue with Stefan, Elena outs herself to Damon. She literally just confessed her undying love for Stefan to Damon in 2x1. Now she's, "Fine, Stefan, whatever." She should've known Damon wouldn't buy that. He also knows Katherine is the root of their fake drama because she was outside the Grill for their first fight. Damon drops it because he wants nothing to do with Katherine and he's not gonna admit to Stefan that he tried to kiss Elena. Stelena's lies have to push so far that Jenna stabs herself. Then Damon will get involved. It's not like Damon is gonna lose sleep over Stefan and Elena having to see each other in secret. They're the ones choosing to be stupid. Jenna isn't about the knowing, she's about the consequence. Elena's issue with being a doppelganger reignites. She wants to know if Stefan is using her to replace Katherine. He just got done spending the day with Katherine, and he never once called Elena to tell her, so yeah... it's an issue for her. "How could you hate her and be in love with me?" Knowing why he hates Katherine will allow Elena to see if he's using her to replace Katherine… for the things he hates about her. "You're reaching." Elena isn't reaching… just like Damon wasn't reaching when he told Stefan that Mason is supernatural. It's important to look at terminology to understand where all of this leads. Know what it means to reach because Elena knows exactly what she's asking. "I'm not… I'm not Damon." A contradiction because Stefan is the only one that hated Katherine. They both know Damon loved her very much. But like always, Stefan tries to use Damon to deflect. I'd rather just skip over this argument because I already did a gif post for it. Damon slams Stelena because they suck at communication.

They cut to this four person party. Jeremy is trying to figure out if Tyler is a werewolf. Jeremy is good at drawing, but he's not Klaus. Klaus is really good. Tyler is so startled by the werewolf drawings that he lures Jeremy into another room. He considers it a personal assault, so he assaults Jeremy. Their scene is written like his carnival scene with Damon. This is exactly how Damon would react to someone learning his truth. Damon and Mason are hilarious. Wow… Mason really screwed himself with this one. Had Damon not been distracted by the argument Stelena just had, he would've known that Mason roofied the drinks. Yeah, Damon is pissed. Liz realizes that a member of her vampire-killing council is a vampire lol. Like yeah, he totally killed vampires to sell himself as a human lol. I love Caroline's moment with Elena here, admitting she's not a good friend at all. She then notices something's up with her mother. Damon is pissed more than before because of the vervain, and so pissed that he's not thinking straight. He's acting impulively, which is what Mason wanted. He wanted Damon and Stefan storming him at once because he's the bait. It's like the easiest thing to do to an impulsive person. Get them to not think, to just follow you. Liz and two deputies. They inject Damon and Stefan with vervain. Because Damon has yet to build a tolerance, it's enough.

So the difference between Mason and Damon is clear. While Mason would stab Damon in the front rather than the back, he's not strong enough to take on Damon because it's not a full moon. So yes, he has Liz getting her hands dirty for him. It's really a cheap shot if you ask me. He literally has a woman doing his dirty work. Tyler tells Jeremy that Mason is a werewolf, but he's not… yet. He basically explains the process on how to trigger his gene. Tyler views Mason the same way Stefan views Katherine. He's not here for him, he's here for the stone. He doesn't consider two birds, one stone. Like duh.

Insane that Mason has Liz and her deputies taking Damon and Stefan into the Lockwood cellar where he turns into a werewolf… and she has no idea he's a werewolf. If she did, he'd be down there with them. "Old slave quarters from the original Lockwood house." The reason I was disgusted with Tyler when he took Aimee down there to make out with her. Mason tries to stay because he wants to make sure they die. He made a big mistake walking away lol. "Well, I'm guessing that he only has to worry about that during a full moon. Otherwise you're not as strong, am I right? Or you would have killed Damon by now." When Stefan confronted Mason, I knew what was gonna happen. It only takes one vampire to take him down. What I like about this episode is how Mason is written opposite Jules. The only way to drag it out painfully, is by hitting Damon's humanity. That's the only way to truly torture him. What makes this extremely uncomfortable for Damon, is knowing that Liz could have tortured him by threatening to stake Stefan to get her answers.

It's sorta like this… John and Anna repeat, only it's Liz and Stefan. I love what this does to Damon. He's not just gonna kill Mason, he's gonna enjoy it. Damon could use Caroline to connect with Liz, but he refuses to. That's another thing I love about this scene. He won't tell her that her daughter is a vampire. That's Caroline's truth to tell. Poor Caroline. She doesn't want her mom to find out about her, and Elena's like… I'm going in there to save them by myself then. Yeah, Damon is refusing to use Caroline to connect with Liz. He's hoping their friendship is strong enough. It's not… Liz hates vampires. She's literally getting ready to stake them when Elena comes in. "Mom." This is why I love Caroline's storylines with her parents. They're so insane. She just killed Liz's deputies right in front of her to save her friends. "Damon's right, you know. If there's ever time to break your diet…" I love how Caroline contradicts herself in her hate for Delena. In 4x7, she tells Elena that Damon is never right. Damon is right most of the time. The animal diet makes it take longer for Stefan to heal. It weakens every aspect… compulsion, healing, strength, even speed. That's why I'm so frustrated with season 4 Stefan. He's gonna go on the human diet to handle Katherine, but expect Elena to defend herself against Connor on the animal diet.

Mason tainted what Damon had. The ability to at least imagine Liz accepting him as a vampire. Because of Liz and Caroline, Elena now knows how Stefan can hate Katherine but be in love with her. He can't love vampires. She's watching Caroline out herself to Liz the way Katherine outed herself to Stefan. Liz's compulsion will follow, so that's included along with Katherine's compulsion on Stefan. Yes, Elena sees the full scope of things through Liz and Caroline. "I can't take this. Kill me now." Liz hates Caroline so much that she begs Damon to kill her. "Relax guys. No one is killing anybody." lol…

Jeremy: Why didn't you give it to him? Tyler: Because he wants it. I'm a dick that way. It's important to him for some reason but I don't trust the guy so I'm not just gonna hand it to him.

Tyler talks to Jeremy about this moonstone. I'm pointing out this part of their conversation because Tyler and Damon have a great deal in common. That's why Damon wanted the Gilbert device. He wanted it because John wanted it and he couldn't trust him. Sarah is the kind of girl I wouldn't party with. Tyler and Jeremy almost lose their shit because she falls down the stairs and plays dead. Some girls are cool to hang out with, but they get too stupid when they're drinking.

Damon is so sweet to Liz. The cellar may not be the Ritz, but she's getting star treatment. He's as particular about his sheets as he is about his clothes. "You have no idea how wrong you are about that." Two birds with one statement. What's beautiful about these scenes is that they're written opposite the carnival. Damon basically admits he was wrong for saying what he did when he tried to kill Caroline. A moment of technicality on Damon's part. Even though she is already dead, she's not gone. Damon is more than honest about vampirism, and he makes sure people know it. Now he regrets it with Caroline. It's kinda like his comment to Jeremy in Denver. Jeremy calls Rose a dead vampire, and Damon tells him that's redundant because vampires are dead lol.

"He can hear us wherever we are because he drinks this." Just so you undertand where I'm going with this... Damon can hear Stelena argue because he's on human blood, but Stefan can't hear Delena talk because he's on the animal diet. It's because of this, Damon is left with another secret to hold onto. It's because Stefan can't hear Damon and Elena that he's blind to the truth of her feeding him.

"Hey, Stefan didn't drink the people blood, if you were curious. But he needs to, and deep down you know that." I'm just gonna say it right now... everything you saw of Stefan feeding in season 1 matters in season 2 lol. As romantic as Stefan might think this moment is, she's basically feeding him because Damon just told her to. Imagine Damon telling Elena to feed Stefan her blood to survive Frederick. That's basically what I'm telling you, but you have to view it scene for scene as compared to the first season. That's why they argue at the fridge that Stefan still has stocked full of blood bags. And yes, they do repeat the Miss Mystic pageant. That's why Elena ends up at the stairwell in 2x8.

So yes, picture Damon telling Elena to feed Stefan as she did here. And yes, Damon knows that in order for Stefan to maintain, Elena will have to feed him. He can't moderate his blood intake drinking from blood bags, and they both know it. Elena is pissed, but she has to accept this truth.

Fans aren't gonna like what I'm about to say, but... this is every reason why Damon and Elena end up together. Damon doesn't need to sink his teeth into Elena to drain her, and people are consumed in different ways. Damon is pushing Elena darker just by pushing her into that room to feed Stefan. He's basically bleeding Elena of her humanity, slowly and gradually until she becomes a vampire. He is her death and her life, the problem and the solution. She argues with Stefan but listens to Damon because they have that connection. They simply build from friendship to romance. And yes, they've always been like this. He persuaded her to Atlanta, persuaded her to bait Noah, persuaded her into the tomb with him... because they have that connection. Their trust and understanding is at such a level that not even Stefan can understand it. Damon is simply able to get through to her in ways that Stefan can't.

I love this conversation Elena has with Caroline. She can't even go home, that's how scared she is of Katherine. Mason tries to contact Liz, but gets her voicemail. He's gonna find out soon enough. Tyler walks in to give him the moonstone because in order to let go of it, he has to let go of all of it. He's done letting it consume him. "I heard." This is Damon's way of telling Elena that he heard because he's on human blood. He wants her to know that he overheard her argument with Stefan.

It's important to know that Stefan's diet isn't the only important part of their argument where Damon is concerned. "Katherine took a little vervain every day and built up a tolerance to it. I could do the same with blood." Damon overheard this and started building his tolerance to vervain. That's why Jules' friend has a hard time dropping him. He got hit with vervain by Stefan in 1x4, hit with vervain by John in 1x22, and just got hit with vervain by Liz. He's done getting hit, put it that way.

So you get this loop back to 2x1. "It's you and me, Stefan. Always." Suppose I should point this out now. Damon and Elena are written in 2x1 and 3x1. Stefan and Elena are written in 2x5 and 3x5. Stefan stops being her always when he rips into her. That's why "always" comes into this scene when she feeds him. Elena's love for Damon is written opposite her hate, so she falls for Damon on her birthday.

Mason has no idea he's giving Katherine the werewolf sacrifice and the moonstone for Klaus' ritual. Something he won't realize until he watches from the other side. "What was that stunt today that you pulled with Damon and Stefan Salvatore? I told you to stay away from them." Katherine knows everything, and she's not happy about it.

The open and close of an episode. They hold off on Katherine until the end, until they're ready to reveal her connection to Mason.

I think it's funny, some of their full circle stuff in this episode. How is Stefan gonna vervain Damon and try to desiccate him for 50 years when the sheriff wants to kill them both lol

[kassandras-one-braincell]

Heyy. Just wanted to chip in and tell you in case you didn’t know. Amanda Overton said for Sevika, she gets sober this season. So, I think it’s less, uh, dangerous (?) to write for her.

Obviously I’m not you and I’m definitely not trying to tell you how to feel. But if you feel like you can’t write for her because she triggers you, just want you to know she’s also getting sober so hopefully that makes it easier…

Hi sweetheart. That's really interesting to know, and I think that general trajectory makes a lot of sense given the surfacing parallels between her and Vander.

I have a really complex relationship with writing Sevika. There's a lot of stuff involving her that I never posted, intentionally, which I wrote as a form of shock-therapy during my first few sober months. Her grit as a character is really important to me, and I can't isolate her from a gritty context in my brain, but I'm now at a stage where I can work with this comfortably, and in a transformative way.

Back in spring or summer last year, I used her as a projection of the shame and disgust I felt with myself as a reconciling addict. It helped a lot, and I'm happy to say that it's not something I need to revisit. But while writing for her wouldn't trigger me, I'm not in any hurry to gloss over the more human, less palatable elements of her character in my writing. It won't be everybody's cup of tea, and that's fine. I'm looking forward to writing her - and writing as a whole - again.

[vickyvicarious]

A Jonathan-Lucy parallel, with Mina as the narrator in both because iirc you had asked for more! About how both Jonathan and Lucy are in a trance while seeing Dracula again, both Lucy and Jonathan needing to snap out of it, Mina in both times being disturbed at how both Lucy and Jonathan are talking to themselves rather than to Mina, and Mina in both instances choosing to not talk to them about it because of her agreeing with both to never speak of their trauma:

Lucy:

“His red eyes again! They are just the same.” It was such an odd expression, coming apropos of nothing, that it quite startled me. I slewed round a little, so as to see Lucy well without seeming to stare at her, and saw that she was in a half-dreamy state, with an odd look on her face that I could not quite make out; so I said nothing, but followed her eyes. She appeared to be looking over at our own seat, whereon was a dark figure seated alone. I was a little startled myself, for it seemed for an instant as if the stranger had great eyes like burning flames; ... I called Lucy’s attention to the peculiar effect, and she became herself with a start, but she looked sad all the same; it may have been that she was thinking of that terrible night up there. We never refer to it; so I said nothing, and we went home to dinner.

Jonathan:

I felt Jonathan clutch my arm so tight that he hurt me, and he said under his breath: “My God!” I am always anxious about Jonathan, for I fear that some nervous fit may upset him again; so I turned to him quickly, and asked him what it was that disturbed him. He was very pale, and his eyes seemed bulging out as, half in terror and half in amazement, he gazed at a tall, thin man, ... I asked Jonathan why he was disturbed, and he answered, evidently thinking that I knew as much about it as he did: “Do you see who it is?” His answer seemed to shock and thrill me, for it was said as if he did not know that it was to me, Mina, to whom he was speaking:— “It is the man himself!” The poor dear was evidently terrified at something—very greatly terrified ... He kept staring ... Jonathan kept looking after him, and said, as if to himself:— “I believe it is the Count, but he has grown young. My God, if this be so! Oh, my God! my God! If I only knew! if I only knew!” He was distressing himself so much that I feared to keep his mind on the subject by asking him any questions, so I remained silent. ... After a few minutes’ staring at nothing, Jonathan’s eyes closed, and he went quietly into a sleep, with his head on my shoulder. I thought it was the best thing for him, so did not disturb him. In about twenty minutes he woke up, and said to me quite cheerfully:—

Oooh, I love this! It really drives home how in a lot of ways Jonathan's condition must have reminded Mina horribly of Lucy.

She was better when Mina left Whitby but before then she had been suffering in her sleep and waking Mina often in the night, was often pale and tired, distressed but wouldn't talk about why...

Then she goes to get Jonathan and he too is pale and weak, easily worn out, deeply traumatized but cannot speak about why, suffers in his sleep from nightmares that wake Mina often in the night...

And then there is this moment, which in addition to echoing Lucy's distressed trance-like recollection of her 'nightmare', also perhaps reminds her of something else. The way Jonathan wakes and is abruptly quite cheerful, inviting Mina to tea - obviously the most direct parallel as readers is to Mina's own similar action after waking from her hypnotic trance today. But for Mina at the time when it happened, I can't help but think it might have reminded her of the way Lucy would sometimes wake the next morning full of energy and cheer after having a bad night (being drunk from). But this didn't really ever seem to last, and when something similar happens with Jonathan, Mina takes it as the final straw that he is not being helped by her ignorance and she needs to read his diary to know how best to aid him.

That's all from Mina's perspective. But there's also a neat contrast between these two moments of speech, a kind of bookending. Lucy can only talk about her experience after Dracula has just left town. His absence partially frees her from the influence that so fully ensured her silence, and even ignorance. Jonathan meanwhile had already escaped Dracula's sphere of influence and his own silence/ignorance was more self-imposed/natural vs supernatural. For him it is Dracula's arrival in town (or at least, near enough to be noticed) that momentarily breaks his silence and puts him back into that trance-like memory.

And yet while both of them speak in Mina's presence, it's mostly only at her. They are really talking to themselves, or to an imagined version of Mina who shares all their knowledge, and despite them speaking to her of their experiences, neither account is enough to clearly communicate anything. In fact they don't know fully themselves what they would be communicating, and it's not until other context is added that Mina can look back at these moments and know what they meant.

[twotangledsisters]

HII so I'm asking anonymously since I'm kinda shy to show myself but would you like to help us in making Cassandra's tangled adventure/cta for short? we're really lacking in people and most of us are multitasking and we really need writers and when I said we needed them the first writer I thought was you since I love your work and because your work is so good I sometimes get excited whenever you reply to my comments in your work. But back to the whole cta thing, the story is about Cassandra finding her true self since she had a sort of identity crisis and she's gonna find her purpose basically and there's gonna be a group for her with 2 ocs and lady Caine whose goal is to stop being a pirate queen since there was no reason for her to be a villain/pirate with her not even being in Corona anymore and so I ask you if you'd like to join? But I'm sure you have a lot in your plate already and I can send you a link to our discord server if you have a account. Also if you can't join I understand that lol but may I ask you to like, spread the info about making the spin-off?:)

Oh, that sounds awesome! I love fan projects like that :D

And I am super flattered that you enjoy my work and thought of me!

The idea of Cassandra finding her identity after the show sounds super engaging! And makes a lot of sense, she spent her life wanting to be a guard, became a villain instead and then left, she's got some figuring out to do, and it's always exciting to see Lady Caine included in projects as I always find the parallels between her and Cass' story awesome!

I would love to help out and contribute here and there, but I wouldn't say I'm able to sign onto any projects fully right now, I just have a lot of my own projects going on and while I may give the illusion of consistency with my publishing schedule.... I am not consistent.

(the trick is to mostly upload completed projects, as well being so ridiculously far ahead that you can just quit writing for a month and keep uploading without anybody noticing... it works for me, but it does not work for team-projects unfortunately)

That and I'm pretty slow to respond, my ability to process words, think of a response and then find the words to communicate that response is... not great.

So yeah, project sounds awesome! Would be happy to help here and there but can't say I have the time to take it on fully. I do really hope you find plenty of people for it though as big fan projects are awesome and I do not see enough of them!!!

[astargatelover]

Thank you for the tag @sonnet-of-anarchy!

Make bed?

Nope - never have 🤷‍♂️

If you could, would you go back to high school?

Hmm, nah, I think I'll pass

Can you parallel park?

I can't even drive! :D

A job you had that would surprise people?

I've actually never had a job.

Do you think aliens are real?

I don't know, it seems pretty likely - probably no planet-spanning empires that'll come knocking on our door anytime soon, but something? I wouldn't rule it out.

Can you drive a manual car?

Again, can't drive.

What is your guilty pleasure?

I refuse to feel guilt for pleasant things (perhaps I am like Julian in that way 🤔😨)

Tattoos?

None and no interest in getting any - they can look very nice, tho

Do you like puzzles?

Love them! Both jigsaw and riddles

Any phobias?

Agoraphobia I think, though that's very tied in with my generalized anxiety. Thalassophobia maybe (ocean big and scary). I also refuse to get on any sort of plane.

Favourite childhood sport?

If you'd asked me as a child I would have said chess - unathletic little me always liked that little work-around xD I hardly ever actually played, though.

First thing you wanted to be growing up?

A veterinarian

Do you talk to yourself?

I talk to myself in my head all the time - it's called thinking

What movies do you adore?

Oof, that's a tough one... You know, I'm not sure there's any pattern! I can tell you I despise horror, tho, just 'cause it's bad for my psyche. (But more power to horror enjoyers.)

Coffee or tea?

Peppermint tea - I don't drink caffeine

Favourite colour?

Canola yellow

Tagging: @galadhir @truelittleblackstar @aidanchaser @valkoinenlintu @cricrithings @science-bish and anybody who feels like it

[starfanatic]

We've heard a specific position about Apollo, and in general, it's normal that some people like it more, some people like it less — everyone has a different experience of perception, emotional return from the representation of the personality image of a particular character in a particular culture, and so on and so forth😅

But here's the thing, I'd be interested to hear your opinion and thoughts about Athena. I don't like her myself, and quite strongly, though intellectually I accept and above all see her good side, the supposed psychological vulnerability to her role in favoritism. And you mentioned your attitude to it here, so it would be very interesting to hear your name.

Speaking about the return on the image of a person, I personally directly grasped the relationship between how exactly pets were found, and why they are not favorites ХD Athena is what I despise, favoritism, but Apollo is more complicated. Admiration for his talents gives rise to a terrible fear of the opposite sides of this coin (not necessarily his, but rather in general): vanity and pride

I think in reality, I'm VERY unfair to Athena, I will admit it. I tend to let Ares get away with a lot of the shit he does simply because I'm rooting for the "underdog" over the winner. But that's simply to do with Athena's actions and the consequences. No matter what Athena does, Zeus will love and cherish her for it. Athena attempts to usurp him and instead of punishing her like EVERYONE ELSE including his wife, he lets her get away with it. I would've found it so much more entertaining if she actually had a consequence for her actions, if she didn't ALWAYS come out on top EVERY single time. Yes she is the goddess of wisdom, but I cannot tolerate how UNFAIRLY she's treated. I think if Ares at least won once against her I wouldn't root so strongly against her, but alas that isn't true.

Though on the flipside, after a tiny bit of reflection I realized that realistically, I wouldn't be the only one upset about Athena even including Ares. I feel like Athena's relationship with A LOT of god is confirmed strained or non-existent, or realistically they wouldn't get along. I've said this already but Athena at the end of the day is treated like COMPETITION. If Ares were to beat her, not only would it jumpstart his ego but it would also make Zeus eat his words (and hopefully make him proud too). Apollo's main competition for favorite child is Athena, and no matter how much I love Apollo he has priorities. I'm not sure about Artemis but I believe she might be the only person possible to get along with Athena... MAYBE.

For the other women, Athena tends to have a "I'm better than the other girls" philosophy so I'm not even sure why she's considered such a feminist. I will admit I remember reading some passages as proof of this but I can't find them??? But I think that even if there wasn't proof of this, I think it would also happen to Athena. (WARNING we are getting into FANON type characterization, this isn't really proved in any mythology passages, but more or less what I can pull out from her characterization). Zeus isn't the most feminist person alive (in fact he's probably one of the least), and she tends to follow in his footsteps. Yes I'm a WOMAN but Aphrodite is a "slut" because she isn't wise in the same way I am. Yes I'm a WOMAN but Hera can be too emotional unlike ME. Yes I'm a WOMAN but Artemis is too wild, she should just be calm and collected like I am. She falls into this habit that ALSO makes her even MORE isolated from the rest of her siblings. It's mostly pride then misogyny but still.

She's not very in tuned to her emotions, though that's because I like paralleling her with Ares. Ares, in my opinion, is the master of emotion and vulnerability which is why it's so easy for him to make people angry. Even the most calm of gods can be set off by him because he KNOWS and FEELS emotion so strongly he knows how to manipulate it in other people. I doubt Ares will ever realize this until someone points it out to him, but still. Athena is the opposite. She's cold, hard logic. She doesn't understand emotions in other people and does NOT like feeling strong emotions herself. Vulnerability is something she's incredibly uncomfortable with as well.

NOW I WILL talk about Apollo, send me another ask, I think I'm a bit confused on what exactly you want me to say about Apollo, sometimes I have a hard time reading and understanding things. I hope this answered your question.

[kckenobi]

thanks for the tag @katierosefun !!!! 💗

do you make your bed? hardly EVER, but in my defense, I pretty much am only in my bedroom when I'm going to sleep or am talking on the phone

what's your favorite number? It's been 8 since I was a kid and my mom said it was her favorite number ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

what is your job? teacher!

if you could go back to school, would you? I'm finishing my masters in a couple of weeks, and unfortunately I really haven't enjoyed it — but that's not because I don't like learning and school, more just a product of the actual institution and the fact that doing night classes half-time with a full-time job is fuckin hard!!! so I wouldn't rule out going back to school, especially because someday I think I'd like to train future teachers and that often involves a PhD, so we'll see :)

can you parallel park? YES and that's honestly my greatest flex.

a job you had that would surprise people? I don't think i have any super surprising past jobs.....i sing in weddings on the side? And funerals?

do you think aliens are real? Totally, it's statistically SO unlikely that the conditions for life as we know it occurred only once

can you drive a manual car? Okay listen,,,,LISTEN,,,.,,,I HAVE driven a manual car. I CAN. However,,,,,it was horrific. My grandfather taught me bc he had a manual and thought everyone should know how to use a stick shift, and I was like haha!!! How hard can it be!!! I love learning new things!!! WRONG it was SO HARD the car stalled CONSTANTLY bc I couldn't time the clutch/gas change properly, literally hyperventilated when I had to (gasp) STOP AT A RED LIGHT on a HILL bc oh god what if it starts going backward and I can't stop WHAT IF— so yeah, honestly I wish I liked it bc it did feel kind of cool, like flying a space ship bc you as the driver have so much more control than with an automatic transmission. But sadly, I did not cross the bridge from stressful to enjoyable lol

what's your guilty pleasure? I try not to feel guilt about the things I enjoy, but maybe it's how much sugar I like in my tea and coffee?

tattoos? sadly I have a weird thing about symmetry (and also making permanent decisions LOL) that I think will probably prevent me from getting one, but I do like the thought

favorite color? probably green!

favorite type of music? folk!!! We love some acoustic guitar and cutting lyrics

do you like puzzles? It seems so contrary to my personality but I actually hate puzzles. They take too long and for no reward bc then you just have to put it all away lol

any phobias? I am claustrophobic, though I've gotten so much better than I used to be!!! Ur girl can ride elevators and be totally calm unless they make weird sounds or there's too many people on them, which is fabulous woooooOoOoOo!!! Also randomly, this is a new one, needles?

favorite childhood sport? I was not a sports person, but baseball

do you talk to yourself? I have an hour commute to work, so the 2 hours I spend alone in the car daily are RIPE with out-loud conversations I have with myself

what movie(s) do you adore? Finch made me SOB, in the best way, and it's still one of my favorites even though I haven't seen it since the first time 3 years ago. Just—at the end of the world there are still butterflies. And to keep going, to be human, is to just love someone more than yourself. TEARS

coffee or tea? I hate that now my answer is generally COFFEE, who am I, i identified as a tea drinker for so long

first thing you wanted to be growing up? an astronaut (but alas, see claustrophobia), and a singing veterinarian (maybe I thought I'd sing the animals back to health, who knows?)

no-pressure tags: @lightasthesun @giggles-and-freckles @pandora15 @siarrawrites @ahsokryze @skywalker-tano-kenobi