#i remember the last time i touched his face a few years ago

[missaengg]

A Bittersweet Reunion

Pairing: Caleb x f!reader Tags: nsfw, mdni, developing relationship, light angst, some plot Word Count: 4.9k Because standing before you is a face you never thought you’d see ever again. Standing before you, dressed in his colonel’s uniform with an apple in his gloved hand, is Caleb, who’s supposed to be dead. The same Caleb you watched die a year ago. The same Caleb you mourned for months, still mourned deep in your heart even though it might appear to the world you’ve moved on. ao3 link here.

Your eyes snap open abruptly, blinking to clear the haze blurring your vision as they adjust to the dim light, a ceiling you don’t recognize coming into view. Dazed, you sit up rapidly, a wave of dizziness overcoming you from the sudden change in elevation. 

Your brain attempts to clear the fog, trying to remember how you came to be on this couch, in this room. The last thing you remember, you were on a mission, tracking down a potential lead about the Aether core not too far from Linkon City. It was supposed to be a simple scouting mission to verify the lead, but a few minutes after your arrival, you were ambushed from behind, your consciousness turning black. The next thing you know waking up in this strange location.

You reach for your holster, cursing under your breath when you find it empty.

The realization you’re unarmed slams the precariousness of your situation into you, the high alert of potential danger returning clarity back to your muddled brain. It’s only now that you notice the blanket draped over you, that your body rests on a black, leather couch. The leather feels smooth under your hands, an attestment to its high level of quality, which fits the caliber of what appears to be a penthouse living room. Though, it’s too dark to distinguish much more than the outline of the sparse furniture inside save for the brief flashes of lightning bursting through the wall-length windows.

Your eyes dart left and right as you try to regain your bearings, searching for a clue as to where you are or who might’ve attacked you.

“You’re awake.”

A deep voice cuts through the silence. Somewhere in the back of your head, you have a nagging sensation that you recognize this voice. There’s a sense of familiarity as though you’ve heard it many times before. A voice that you’ve missed ardently for the past year, but it couldn’t be. It’s impossible.

The long tail of a heavy, black coat and a pair of pristine knee-high, leather boots sweep into your vision. Your eyes follow the intruder’s form up, your heart wrenching when they settle on his face. Because standing before you is a face you never thought you’d see ever again. Standing before you, dressed in his colonel’s uniform with an apple in his gloved hand, is Caleb, who’s supposed to be dead. The same Caleb you watched die a year ago. The same Caleb you mourned for months, still mourned deep in your heart even though it might appear to the world you’ve moved on.

“You’re alive?” The words tumble out of your mouth before you can stop them.

Caleb meets your gaze, a flicker of something akin to regret crossing his galaxy-colored purple eyes. After a momentary pause, he answers, “I am.”

He provides no explanation. No apology. He provides nothing, but silence, and it hangs heavily in the air, the only two occupants of the room frozen in place. One frozen from guilt. The other from shock.

You break the silence first, hesitantly reaching for his face, your fingers gingerly tracing the curve of his cheek. “Is it really you?”

Caleb nods, leaning into your touch and placing his hand over yours. “It’s me… I’m back.” He nuzzles your palm causing you to gasp and lay your hand flush against his face.

You can feel the warmth of his cheek on your palm, the pressure of his large hand covering yours. The warmth spreads across your hand and down your arm, proof that the Caleb before you isn’t a dream. That he’s real and alive and in front of you. 

But you’ve had this dream so many times before only to wake up, your hand grasping nothing that you don’t trust what your senses are telling you. “I’m not dreaming? You’re real?”

Caleb chuckles, and you feel his facial muscles shift and his amusement vibrate on your fingers. “I’m as real as I’ll ever be, Pipsqueak.”

You close your eyes, wondering if you dare allow yourself to believe this is reality, that he won’t disappear when you open them again.

“Hey.” Caleb’s voice pulls you out of your reverie, and you feel his hand cradle your chin, tilting it towards him. “It’s really me. I’m really here.”

Holding your breath, you open your eyes one at a time, still skeptical as to whether this is just another dream, but when your vision clears, it’s filled with Caleb’s gentle smile. Tears spring to your eyes. “Caleb…” You lurch forward, throwing your arms around his shoulders. “I missed you. I missed you so much.”

Caleb returns your embrace, patting your back in soothing circles, the same way he did when you were children. “I know. I missed you too.”

It’s only now with his arms around you that you can admit to yourself this isn’t a fleeting illusion, that he’s actually here in the flesh. Hugging you.

That he’s been alive for the past year and didn’t tell you.

The relief you feel shifts into a seething rage that courses through your veins like fire. You shove him away, roughly, clenching your hands into fists and slamming them into his shoulders. Once. Twice. Three times before you feel any semblance of satisfaction. “You’re alive, and you didn’t tell me?!” You hit him again, each contact of your fist with his torso echoing your frustration and grief. “Why? Why didn’t you say anything?!”

Caleb simply stands there, doing nothing to block your assault as if he knows he deserves every ounce of your ire. He allows you to pummel him, over and over again until you stop of your own volition, too exhausted to continue.

“I couldn’t,” he replies when you finally settle, casting his gaze away from you to the floor. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry? Sorry?!” you snarl, disbelief raising the volume of your voice with each word you spit out. “Sorry doesn’t cut it, Caleb. You let me think you were dead for a year. A year!” You punch him one more time. Hard.

“I know.”

“I mourned you for an entire year, Caleb. Why? Why didn’t you tell me?” Your voice cracks as it trails off, your unshed tears adding a hoarseness to the otherwise clear timbre of your voice.

“I’m sorry…”

You slump back onto the couch, your spent fists dropping listlessly into your lap. “Where…where have you been all this time? Why couldn’t you tell me you were alive? Why couldn’t you contact me?” The questions come quickly as your fingers twist together with so much force, they turn white. “Why?”

“I’ll explain everything. I promise.”

You stare at your childhood friend who refuses to look you in the eye while rolling that stupid apple in his hands. You want to keep demanding him for answers, anything to explain himself even if they’re half-hearted lies, but seeing him alive triggers the memory of the explosion that killed him. Even a year later, you can still recall the scene so vividly. You can still feel the raging heat burning your skin. The eruptive force knocking you off your feet. The acrid smoke stinging your nose. The despair as you discovered the necklace you gifted him through your blurry vision and your ringing ears.

No one could’ve survived a blast of that magnitude. No one. But somehow Caleb survived, and if Caleb had been alive after all this time, then it’s possible he might not be the only survivor.

“Grandma,” you whisper, your eyes widening with possibility, a hope you haven’t felt in a long time blooming in your heart. “If you’re alive, does that mean…Is she…?”

“No,” Caleb answers curtly, his kind eyes turning cold. “She’s dead.”

Your face twists. A part of you knew that it was a slim possibility, but the resulting devastation is the same, slashing the delicate hope you dared feel to pieces. “How did you…survive?”

Guilt ripples below Caleb’s stony expression. His silence creates a suffocating tension that hangs palpably in the air, so long a horrible thought pops into your head. One so awful it kills you to even consider it. One you can’t even begin to entertain, let alone fathom.

“Were you– Did you–” cause the explosion? You want to ask, but the rest of your question withers away in your throat because the idea of Caleb being responsible for Grandma’s death is too horrific for you to voice out loud. 

Caleb doesn’t say a word, but he doesn’t have to. The pained expression he wears on his face says everything.

“No…Caleb, tell me that’s not true,” you demand, searching his face for even a hint that you’re wrong. Dead wrong. “Tell me you didn’t– Tell me I’m mistaken, that I don't know what I’m accusing you of.”

Caleb flinches at the sharp edge in your voice. “It had to be done.”

“I don’t understand.” You lean forward, desperate to know what he’s thinking, desperate to make this all make sense even if in some twisted way. “She took us in and raised us when we had nowhere else to go. How could you?”

“Pipsqueak, I…” Caleb runs a tired hand over his face, over the bags under his eyes and his haggard, sunken cheeks. “I didn’t have a choice.”

“How can you say that? Of course you had a choice,” you shout, vehemently shaking your head and bolting upright onto your knees. “How could you murder the woman who gave us a home?” You’re so incensed you almost don’t notice the way Caleb clenches his fists and grits his teeth, but you don’t care. You don’t care if he’s agitated. You need answers, answers only he can give. “Caleb, answer me.”

“Because she hurt us!” he explodes before softening. “Because…she hurt you. She had to pay for her crimes.”

“Caleb, she saved us.”

“She experimented on us.���

“And then she had a change of heart,” you argue.

“It doesn’t matter. She’s just as culpable as the other scientists,” Caleb says with a finality. “She hurt us – hurt you – and for that she had to pay.”

“No, Caleb.” You press your lips together, surveying the man barely holding himself together in front of you. A man you barely recognize anymore. “She saw what they were doing to us and broke us out. You know that.”

Caleb laughs harshly, his laughter devoid of any warmth, ringing hollow in the cold, dark room. “She didn’t.”

“What?”

“The organization decided that we’d be less stressed in a home environment so they tasked her with raising us. It was just another means to gather data for their experiments.”

“That…” That you didn’t know. Deep creases form in your brow as you process this new revelation, but deep down you know it doesn’t matter. Not anymore, now that she’s gone. “It might’ve started that way, but she never went back. She took us away and hid. She made it right.”

You startle when Caleb ruffles your hair the way he used to in the days before he “died”, a ghost of a rueful grin on his lips. He takes a seat on the black marble coffee table, looking down at the apple in his hand as he muses on old, painful memories. “You were too young to remember, but I remember everything. I remember how they kept us locked up. How they poked and prodded us. How they ignored our screams.” He levels his gaze with yours. “I remember how you’d cling to me after they were done. How you’d cry yourself to sleep in my arms. How powerless I was to stop it – stop them. I remember it all.”

A storm rages in the depths of his gaze, one so turbulent it causes your breath to hitch in your throat. “Caleb…”

“But I’m not powerless anymore.” Caleb’s eyes narrow into slits. “Not anymore.”

Buried deep beneath his fury, you catch a glimpse of the scared, little boy he must’ve been back then. The same hurt, little boy who bravely protected you the best he could with no one there to comfort him. You reach for him, slowly, but your hand falters at the last moment. “This isn’t you. This isn’t the Caleb I know.”

You silently plead with him to deny everything he’s just said. To say he hasn’t changed. That he’s still the same Caleb, the same childhood friend you’ve always known.

Caleb smirks, the corner of his mouth twitching upwards, but his eyes are blank. Emotionless. Dead. 

“Caleb...?”

“Did you honestly think I’d always be the same kind-hearted boy from your childhood?” he asks cruelly as he lits the apple to his mouth and takes a bite, his canines glinting as they sink into the fruit. A streak of lightning hurtles through the night sky behind him, bathing him in an ominous glow.

You watch in muted horror as he chews methodically, taking his time to grind the white flesh between his teeth and swallow.

“I’m not the Caleb you knew anymore,” he says remorsefully. “I changed the moment I started my revenge.”

“...Revenge?”

“For what they did to you,” Caleb growls, slamming the apple down on the table and spraying flecks of juice over its polished surface. “The ones who experimented on us. Ever. I’m going to destroy them piece by piece from the inside out until there’s nothing left. So they can’t harm us – harm you – ever again.”

You yearn to tell him that he doesn’t have to, that you don’t need revenge. That you only wish for him to be back in your life, but the steely resolve engulfing him gives you pause because you can sense that nothing you say will change his mind. Nothing you say will stop him. “Is that what you’ve been doing all this time?” you ask instead.

Caleb nods.

“All by yourself?”

He nods again.

Something inside you breaks to know that he’s been on his own, alone, consumed by anger, pain, and hate. You reach for him again, but this time you cradle his head in your arms, nestling it into your shoulder. “You don’t have to do this alone. I can fight with you.”

Caleb stirs, his fingers clutching the hem of your shirt like a child clutching someone for comfort. “I want…I want to keep you in a world where it’s just the two of us. I want that more than anything,” he begins, quietly, his voice muffled by your body. “But until everything is resolved, I need to make sure you’re safe and sound. I need to know you’re out of harm’s way.”

You pull back, placing both of your hands on his shoulders, looking him square in the eyes. “I’m not the same young girl from back then. I can handle myself. I’m a Hunter, I fight wanderers for fuck’s sake.”

The corners of Caleb’s mouth quirk upwards into a tiny, wry grin, the first genuine smile breaking through his frigid exterior. “I never said you couldn’t, Pipsqueak.”

“Then why?”

Caleb cups your cheek, stroking it with his thumb. Despite the leather glove, the warmth of his hand somehow manages to reach you, sinking below the surface and stoking a bittersweet nostalgia. “Because…” His voice trembles. “...it would kill me if something were to happen to you.”

His eyes waver with fear, regret, and…longing. A wistful yearning that you know all too well, one you’ve suppressed time and time again. Your head tilts before you process what you’re doing, your lips seeking his if only to satisfy your desire to touch him, desire laced with your own anguish and need.

“Squeaks…” Caleb stops you before your lips meet. “Don’t… Don’t tempt me.”

“I’m not,” you snap, jerking back, the realization of what you almost did and his rejection burning on your cheeks. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking. I–” 

But you’re interrupted when Caleb grazes your collarbone, the intimate nature of his touch furthering the scorching blush spreading on your face. His finger hooks under the silver chain around your neck and pulls, exposing the small apple charm and nameplate with the words “When U Come Back” inscribed in the metal from where it hides under your shirt. 

His breath hitches, eyeing the necklace in his hand. “You’ve been wearing this all this time?”

Your heart twinges when you see the charms glittering on his palm, remembering all the nights you clutched it to your heart as you cried yourself to sleep. The way you felt it pressed against your sternum when you laid a hand over your chest every time you missed him, multiple times a day.

“It was the only thing I had left…of you.”

Caleb curls his fingers around the pendants, taking care not to tug the chain lest he hurts you. He closes his eyes and bites his lip, a shudder-like groan rising from deep within and ripping through his throat. “Do you know how difficult it was for me? To have to hold myself back while seeing you everyday? I know what I feel is wrong. I know you only see me as an older brother. But I’ve always held myself back and endured. Day, after day, after day. It was suffocating.” Caleb opens his eyes, staring at you imploringly. He breathes heavily as if each labored breath is a battle to restrain himself. “So don’t make this harder for me, Squeaks, cause I don’t know how much I can hold back anymore.” 

You bring your hands to the sides of his face, leaning forward and resting your forehead against his, your faces so close, the tips of your noses brush together. “Then don’t. Don’t hold back anymore,” you whisper. “I never thought of you as my brother, Caleb. I want this. I want you.”

Caleb draws in a sharp breath, and then his arms are circling your waist, pulling you into his lap. His lips find their way to yours, moving with an urgency that matches your own, a frantic need to consume him in his entirety.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a long time,” he husks, pulling away just enough to speak, his ragged breath a wisp of heat on your lips. He sweeps his thumb tenderly along your bottom lip, a wanton heat flooding his hooded eyes.

You forget how to breathe. The lust in his eyes holds you captive, sending your stomach aflutter. “Me too,” you murmur.

A quiver runs down Caleb’s tense body, and then his lips are on yours once more, holding you tight as though you might disappear if he lets go, his large hands pressing firmly on your back as they roam. Neither of you break the kiss, not even to breathe, so consumed by the hunger to feel one another after being apart for so long, as if you couldn’t get enough of one another. Because you couldn’t. Not after a year of missing him, wishing you could hold him in your arms, dreaming of his touch.

Caleb’s breath mingles with yours, his tongue darting to the slight part between your lips, demanding entrance. You accede, and his tongue slips in, entwining with your own. You can taste the remnants of the apple he ate just moments before lingering on his tongue adding a sweetness to the dizzying onslaught of passionate kisses you share.

All your senses are filled with Caleb. Moaning, your fingers dig into the stiff fabric of his coat along his broad back, reeling from the scent of his cologne, the warmth of his embrace, the tickle of his teeth nibbling your lip, his heady pants puffing in your ear. But it’s not enough, not even close to being enough.

You want more.

His lips relinquish their hold and travel down the curve of your neck, a trail of fleeting, feathery kisses left behind in their descent. Waves of pleasure radiate from each epicenter, tingling down your spine and pooling into an unsatiated arousal.

A surprised gasp darts out from between your swollen lips when his teeth graze over where your heartbeat pulses as your hips twitch, your body now painfully aware of just how even the simplest of his touch is driving you to the brink of insanity. How even the most gentle of his caresses are igniting a fire you can’t extinguish on your own. “I want…I want to feel you.”

Caleb growls, a guttural sound filled with his desire, evidence of his crumbling resolve. Reluctantly, he pulls away from your neck, fumbling in his haste to remove his crisp, yet cumbersome officer’s coat. He discards the heavy fabric to the push carpet, and once he’s free, you waste no time reaching for the buttons of his shirt, slipping each confining circle through their tethers as fast as your fingers can allow. His bare torso comes into view, bit by bit, each reveal quickening your pulse until your heart hammers in your chest.

Caleb loosens his tie, but before he can finish pulling it off over his head, your mouth is on him, tracing every rise and crevice of his muscles with your tongue, with your lips, and with your teeth.

“Shit, Pipsqueak,” he rasps, somehow managing to toss his tie aside while your mouth distracts him.

A strained ache pulses beneath the surface that fuels your desire, emboldening you to leave a dark, red bruise wherever your mouth lands.

“Squeaks, slow down,” Caleb hisses, pushing you back gently, but you cling to him, steadfast, refusing to quit your torment.

“No,” you mumble against his flushed skin, continuing your ravagement much to his detriment. “I just got you back…I want…I want you…”

Caleb mutters a near inaudible ‘fuck’, and then springs into action, hauling you to your feet. Soon, the two of you are a tangle of limbs and fabric in an attempt to separate flesh from cloth. Tugging your shirt over your head. Yanking his shirt over his shoulders. Unclasping bras. Unbuttoning pants. Unbuckling belts. One by one, they too join the discarded clothing on the floor, cast aside without a second thought.

Your lips locked together, Caleb falls back on the couch, and you fall with him, your legs tucked, straddling his thighs. A hand on your lower back, his other slides to your breast, kneading the soft flesh and thumbing your pert nipple intent on eliciting a sweet little moan.

You give him what he wants. You moan, a throaty, sultry, breathless moan.

Caleb buries his face in between your naked breasts, planting reverent kiss after kiss along the swell. He catches a nipple between his teeth, flicking it with the tip of his tongue and rolling it in his mouth.

Your fingers twist into his hair, your body humming from delight. A particularly naughty nip drives you to gasp his name and arch your back, your throbbing sex grinding down into his pelvis and dragging along the length of his clothed erection, the thin fabric of his briefs one of the last two barriers separating you from him.

“Caleb,” you whimper, a wordless plea begging him to make you his, to claim you as his own.

Caleb presses one last kiss to the divet between your breasts. “I won’t be able to stop myself if we continue,” he pants, his voice strained with restraint. Do you still want this? Want me? His unspoken question quivers in his probing gaze.

“Caleb, I want you.” Holding his gaze, you sit up on your knees and hook your thumbs over the waistband of your underwear, dragging it down your thighs, over your knees, and off your ankles. You toss the thin item of clothing aside. Your answer to his question. “Don’t make me wait any longer. Please.”

Caleb releases a long, drawn-out groan, what little resolve he has left crumbling. He tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear, caressing the side of your face as he commits every detail of you to his memory. “God, you’re beautiful.” 

He kisses you again, sweetly, tenderly. His hand glides down the side of your body, grazing the plush of your thigh with the pads of his fingers, coming between your legs and running through your folds. As he does, he violently twitches, feeling how ready you are for him, how your slick arousal coats his fingers.

A shaky whimper escapes you when Caleb finds his way to your clit, stroking the sensitive bud in sloppy circles. Shockwaves of pleasure rip through your lower abdomen, leaving you squirming, mewling, whispering his name and biting back moans.

“You’re driving me crazy,” Caleb murmurs into your ear. “The way you sing for me.”

His voice reverberates in your ear, husky and low, a spine-tingling thrill throbbing in your sex, your need for him growing too painful for you to ignore. Dizzy with desire, you reach for his briefs, intent on removing the last obstacle keeping you from him. “I want to feel you…feel you inside me.”

Caleb curses, lifting his hips so you can pull his underwear down past his hips and his thighs, kicking it off once you reach his knees. He grasps the sides of your hips, simultaneously guiding you down onto him as he thrusts up to enter you. You sink down his length, gasping as your warmth encases him and his cock drags on your walls.

“Caleb,” you cry out, reeling from how he’s stretching you with his girth. You feel yourself clench around him, hearing Caleb grunt as your walls flutter to accommodate his size.

“Shit, you feel…feel so good.” Caleb rakes his teeth over the crest of your shoulder, his chest heaving in and out, his passion getting the best of him. “Fuck.”

Tightening his grip, he rocks you against him, his movements controlled, slow. Your lips meet, stealing the breath out of each other’s mouths, coming together and parting, building into a heady whirlwind. As your kisses grow more fervent, so too do Caleb’s thrusts. Your hands fall forwards, bracing themselves on the back of the couch. Your legs hinge at the knees, rising and sinking onto Caleb to match his urgent rhythm.

This – Caleb’s body joined with yours, his fingertips digging into your skin, his lips claiming yours – is everything you’d ever wanted, better than everything you’d ever dreamed.

Better than all the times you spent touching yourself imagining him inside you, claiming all the intimate parts of yourself you wanted to save for him. Better than dreaming of how it’d feel to be in his arms, kissing him, being kissed by him. How he’d whisper your name and stroke your hair. How he’d hold you tight and never let you go.

Breaking the kiss, you throw your head back, the unmistakable tightening of the coil pulling your muscles taut. Caleb plants his lips on the side of your neck, sucking down, collecting the taste of your skin on his tongue. He bucks into you at a relentless pace, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix with each deep thrust. You can barely keep up with how fast he’s going, how quickly he has you riding his lap.

“Caleb,” you mewl, your eyes closed, your mouth parted. “Caleb, Caleb, Caleb…” You ardently whisper his name over and over again.

“Say my name,” Caleb mumbles. “Say it again.”

“Caleb…” you whimper.

The coil is tense with pressure, on the cusp of snapping free. 

“Tell me you love me,” Caleb pleads, his breath wisping on your skin.

“I love you.” You brush your lips on his brow. “I love you.” On the pink glow dusting his cheeks. “I love you.” On the tip of his nose. “I love you.”

Caleb tilts his head up seeking you, and you rest your forehead on his, your lips mere inches away from one another, your breaths mixing together, drinking each other in.

Caleb’s hips snap into you, hard, and then you feel it, the coil springing free, releasing all the pent up tension it was holding. All the words you’ve wanted to say to one another over the years. All the repressed emotions. All the happy memories and the shared joy. All the grief and anguish and pain. All of it culminating into a burst of ecstasy roiling through your quaking body.

You passionately cry out his name, tremors coursing up and down your body. Caleb continues rolling your hips together with his, your rapture pushing him further over the brink, but when your walls pulsate around his length, he catapults over the edge, slamming you down onto his lap as he floods you with his own euphoric bliss.

Foreheads pressed together, Caleb whispers “I love you” before closing the distance between your lips, savoring how you taste, how you feel. He gently shifts your bodies, still joined together as one, until you’re both lying on the couch, wrapped in each other’s arms.

You snuggle into his firm chest, relishing how perfectly your bodies seem to fit together, how your head seems to tuck effortlessly under his chin. Your eyes flutter closed. The steady rhythm of his heartbeat in your ears lulls you into a state of drowsiness.

You feel safe. At home. Protected. Cherished. Loved.

As the hazy tendrils of sleep tug on your consciousness, it faintly occurs to you that you didn’t ask him how you came to be here in this penthouse suite with him. But you push the thought from your mind. Right now, you’re just happy to have him back. Right now, you want nothing more than to stay in his arms.

Tomorrow. You can ask him tomorrow.

But for now, all you want is to hear the steady rhythm of his heartbeat and the warmth of his embrace.

For now, all you need is him.

The answers can come tomorrow.

Taglist: @william-rex

[yunotrbl]

stay like this forever

pairing: dad!jaehyun x reader

w.c: 1.1k

genre - fluff. lots of it.

summary: you and jaehyun are preparing for and celebrating your son's fifth birthday.

note: this is my first time posting on here.. and it's probably not my best because i had to cook something up rq..

Both you and Jaehyun watched as the clock struck midnight, exchanging gentle smiles afterward. 

It was officially your son’s fifth birthday, and both of you were feeling a whirlwind of emotions. How had it been five years already? You remembered the day as if it were yesterday—the fear, the excitement, and the pure joy all at once. You recalled how happy Jaehyun had been, the smile on his face when he held his son for the first time. His boy.

Tears filled your eyes as you thought about it. It took so much effort to bring a healthy baby boy into this world. It took even more work to build this perfect little family—two beautiful children with the best parents they could ever ask for. Your heart felt so full.

 “Our baby is growing up on us, huh?” he chuckled, pulling you into a hug as he noticed the pout forming on your face. “He’s the best thing that ever happened to me. So is our baby girl.” He glanced at the baby monitor sitting on the coffee table, your daughter still sound asleep.

Jaehyun was in the middle of helping you decorate the living room and kitchen for your son to see when he woke up—a tradition that Jaehyun had shown you from his own childhood, and one you had grown to love. 

“Doesn’t feel like that was five years ago. Look at my baby,” your voice shook as you looked at his birthday pictures over the years, scattered across the table. He had inherited his dad’s entire face. At first, you might have been a little jealous, but over time, you grew to love it, and so did Jaehyun.

“He’s handsome like his daddy,” Jaehyun replied, and you didn’t even need to look back to know he was smiling. You nudged his shoulder playfully, rolling your eyes as you wiped your tears, focusing on the task at hand—wrapping gifts in the colorful spiderman paper your son picked out days before.

He was a pretty simple kid for his age, asking for just a few toys and a Polaroid camera. But you and Jaehyun, being the parents you are, planned an entire day dedicated to him. After all, he deserved it. He was truly amazing.

Once you both finished decorating, you stepped back to admire your work. 

“How many kids like Spider-Man these days?” you asked. It seemed like every kid did, but at least this year you could actually find decorations, unlike last year when Jaehyun went through hell and back to find cookie decorations to give your son the sugar cookie party he wanted. The thought made you giggle.

“I don’t know, probably all of them. Spider-Man is pretty cool,” Jaehyun replied with a warm smile, pulling you closer until your foreheads gently touched. The corners of your lips lifted into a smile that mirrored his joy. 

“What’s with that look?” you asked, playfully teasing him as his dimples made their appearance, more prominent than usual. 

With a tender grip, he took both of your hands in his and said, “Thank you for giving me the greatest gift of my life. He’s absolutely perfect, just like his mama.” 

Your heart fluttered at the compliment, and a wave of emotion swelled within you, causing your bottom lip to quiver. “Dammit, Jae,” you whined, burying your face into his shoulder to hide the tears that threatened to spill. He chuckled softly, a sound that felt like a warm embrace, and pressed a gentle kiss to your head, rubbing your back in soothing circles.

“Let’s head to bed, ‘kay? You’re especially emotional tonight,” he suggested, a playful grin stretching across his face as he continued to rock you ever so slightly. “At this rate, your tears are going to fill up the whole room like Spongebob,” he joked, bursting into laughter at his own silly comparison.

“You’re so lame,” you replied with a laugh, playfully nudging his shoulder again before taking his hand and leading him up the stairs, shutting the lights off.

—-

The next morning, the sun's warm rays filtered through the curtains as you trailed behind Jaehyun into your son’s room, the camera clutched tightly in your hands. Jaehyun was balancing a beautifully decorated cupcake adorned with a flickering candle, a glimmer of excitement in his eyes. Birthdays were really his favorite days of the year, and it showed.

As he pulled open the blinds, the soft morning light flooded the room, gently rousing your son from his slumber. He rubbed his eyes groggily, mouth forming a confused little pout. When his gaze landed on the two of you, he squinted against the brightness, still trying to shake off the remnants of sleep.  

You settled beside him on his bed, rubbing his back, while Jaehyun knelt down infront of him, holding the cupcake aloft. 

As your son’s sleepy eyes widened in realization, a radiant smile spread across his face, lighting up the room like the sunshine itself. He instinctively covered his mouth with his small hands, his cheeks turning a warm shade of pink from the surprise.

You let Jaehyun take the lead as you both sang "Happy Birthday," giggling at your son’s shy reactions.

“Happy birthday, dear Sunjae! Happy birthday to you!” The excitement in your voices filled the room, and his face lit up even more. With a quick breath, he blew out the candle on his cupcake, his happiness shining through as he pulled you both into a tight hug.

In a playful tone, Jaehyun gently rubbed little Sunjae’s back and whispered, “Happy birthday, sweet boy.” 

You leaned in and showered Sunjae with kisses on his cheeks, your heart bursting as his giggles filled the air like music. “We love you so much, little peach,” you said, your voice warm and full of love, soaking in this perfect moment together. 

Sunjae started to squeal as his baby sister rushed in after hearing all the commotion. She dropped her stuffed bunny at the door and jumped onto the bed with him, pulling him into a tight hug. 

“Happy birthday, Sunny!” she exclaimed, pushing you and Jaehyun aside as she squeezed her brother tighter. Their bodies rolled over on the bed, and they both burst out laughing.

“Aren’t you the sweetest girl ever?” Jaehyun asked, smiling at your two little ones.

“She gets it from you,” you replied, and the way he smiled at you said everything.

He was happy, you were happy, and your babies were happy. How lucky were you to share this moment with the person you love most and the two children you created together?

[naughtyneganjdm]

Threads of Desire: A Christmas to Remember - Chapter 6

Summary: Working one one one with Guy is not what Y/N expects it to be and when she leaves work, she has to come face to face with the decisions that she made the night before with Negan.

Characters: Negan Smith, the reader (OC), Guy, etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/61111030/chapters/159641806

Warnings: 18+, Swearing, Cheating, Angst, Smut, Heavy Touching, Oral etc.

Notes: Now that one of my other stories is finished, I will do my best to update this as much as I can so I can get it finished. Thanks to anyone that reads. Sorry life got so busy. If you want to read the other chapters, be sure to check them out here.

No sleep was something that Y/N had pretty much gotten used to over these last few days. By now? She was living on caffeine. Today she was surprised she could even keep her head up. After everything happened last night, Daryl had stayed over until it was time for her to start getting ready for work. So that meant the only sleep she got was between the time she crashed after getting home yesterday and when Negan came over.  Caffeine was pretty much her lifeline right now and she was incredibly thankful for it. Especially today since Guy had personally requested her to work one on one with him. That was a big surprise. For the last four years all she had been was Maggie’s sidekick. Now she was actually working with the owner of the company on a big project. It was shocking that Guy would even trust her touching something like this or respect her opinion at all. Being a glorified slave working under Maggie really didn’t give her the right to an opinion.

Yawning out, Y/N turned her head to gaze over at the clock on the wall of Guy’s office. While she was enjoying getting to work on what she was, it was getting pretty dark outside. It was a very long days’ worth of work. Surprisingly? Guy was very much dedicated completely to working today. Everything was very detailed, full of information to help her work efficiently and they made a decent team. By his actions, it felt like Guy was training her for a certain position and it was her first day on the job. If this was someone’s first day on the job though, they would have never had to work this much. This was a lot for someone who had been working in Maggie’s position for years. Someone who was just starting? If they didn’t know what Y/N did, they may have fallen on their face with everything Guy was throwing on them.

Getting to work with Guy today meant that it left Maggie all alone to herself. Amusingly enough, Y/N couldn’t think of the last time that Maggie had ever worked alone. Maybe in her first few weeks on the job before she got Y/N hired as her assistant? Regardless, Maggie was very startled when she learned today that Guy requested Y/N to work with him. Multiple times Maggie tried to insert herself into what they were doing, but Guy never allowed it. That didn’t stop Maggie from making her presence known when she would walk in multiple times during the day to see what they were working on.

Shaking her head, Y/N tried waking herself up enough to finish her work. Today Guy had started her day off with a coffee and breakfast that he bought for her. And when lunch came along, he got her another coffee with their lunch. Even with two coffees, she was doing her best to stay awake.

Shifting in her seat, she stole a quick look behind her to see that the office was completely dark except for the backup lights that remained on during the night. Considering how long they had been here? It was obvious that the two of them were the last people there. Maggie had gone home hours ago and she knew that because Maggie came in to tell them that. There was no longer any daylight coming in from the windows and Guy’s office was the only place on this floor that was lit up. Being alone with Guy certainly was a strange feeling, but it didn’t bother her all that much.

Turning back to her work, she straightened up her posture hoping that she didn’t appear to be bored. It was then she saw across from the large table in Guy’s office that he was staring out at her from the other end of it. His elbow was resting on the table with his hand holding his head up from where it was resting in his palm. Having his big, brown eyes locked on her made her nervous. When their eyes locked, he gave her a big smile and she returned the gesture with a smaller smile.  

“I think we need to add some more shots of espresso to your lattes when we get you them next time. Pump you up with caffeine. I expect my employees to keep going for as long as I need them,” Guy winked, adjusting his body to get more comfortable in the seat that he was in. Reaching for the pencil that was on the table, he started sketching at something again. Hopefully that wasn’t him upset with her.

“Sorry,” she frowned forcing herself to continue looking through the paperwork that Guy had given her about an upcoming show that they were having. “I just haven’t slept much over the last few days. I promise I’ll do better tomorrow.”

“You’re doing fine today,” Guy assured her keeping his focus centered in on his work, “If this is what you’re like on little to no sleep, I think we’ll be lucky to see you work well rested.”

“Thanks,” she was surprised to hear Guy say that, but she was going to take the compliment. Giving her a nod, Guy cleared his throat. Wiggling his finger at her, he motioned her to him. Standing up from where she was seated, she moved around the table and looked at the drawing that he had done. “This is for the winter collection?”

“It is,” Guy leaned back in his chair observing her gazing upon the drawing. “There is something that you don’t like about it.”

“It’s not that I don’t like it,” she began, biting down on her bottom lip realizing that she was stepping out of line. It wasn’t her place to give her opinion on things like this. “You know what? No. Never mind. It looks great. I’m sure when you make it, people will love it.”

“No, no…” Guy reached out to snatch her hand to pull her back toward his end of the table. Standing up, Guy forced her to take a seat in his chair. “If you think there is something I could do better, show me. I need a moment to stand anyways.”

“I don’t want to offend you, I just know it’s the main piece for the show and…” she started, a rush of liquid warmth flooding throughout her body with Guy hushing her. Shaking his head, he leaned forward to grab the pencil and handed it to her. “Can I talk it out with you first?”

“I’m listening,” he muttered, grunting out with him stretching out his body by raising his arms up in the air. The movement drew his shirt to lift to reveal his lower abdomen causing her to swallow down loudly. Forcing herself to look away, she started to anxiously erase at the parts of his design that she thought could use some work.

“I just think it’s very simple for something that was made by you. You like to stun and wow people. It was the thing that drew me to you from the start. It’s not that you go overboard, it’s just that you add something unique. Different. It’s what makes you…well you. It’s what let’s someone know they are wearing the Vixen brand.”

Pressing his hand in against the back of the seat and bracing his weight on the table beside the drawing, Guy watched her draw out what she was thinking when adding to his design. It made him smile when she seemed to get lost in her idea until the very end. And when she was done, she pushed the art before him with a nervous glance.

“If you hate it, that’s okay. It’s easy to erase and go back to what you want,” she thought aloud with Guy looking it over. Anxiety was eating away at her with the person she had admired most of her life finally getting a real look at her work. “I guess it’s kind of a nod to one of your original pieces from years ago. Just a little bit different. That was a piece for spring though, so we want something more…”

“Like this,” Guy commented with a firm nod of his head, sucking at his bottom lip. Moving over toward his desk he set the drawing down and gave her a thumbs up. “I’ll see what I can do. You keep surprising me. You know that?”

“In a good way, I hope,” she noted moving back over toward where she was sitting originally to get back to work on what she was doing before. Moving across the office, Guy sat on the edge of the table and motioned her to stop.

“Both yesterday and today I have been going out of my way to quiz you on what you know,” Guy explained to her, reaching up to brush his fingers through his dark hair. “And you haven’t missed a step. Not once. You know more about this company than I think Maggie does.”

Well, that was a true statement, but she didn’t know how honest she wanted to be with him, “I’m sure that’s not true.”

“Oh no, it’s very true,” Guy claimed, stroking his fingers down over the side of his chiseled jawline. “You know way too much for someone who is just a personal assistant. I mean, I know they say the nurses are better at the doctor’s job than the actual doctor, but this is a little too on the nose.”

Forcing herself to look down, she cleared her throat and attempted to reach for the work to finish again, but Guy pushed it back on the table. Outstretching his hand, he faintly grabbed her chin to get her to look up at him, “You really do admire the shit outta me, don’t you?”

“Maggie’s words?” she wondered with Guy giving her a firm nod, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat. “If you mean admire you in the way that you’re the whole reason I got into this business, then yeah. I do. I did.”

“Did?” he repeated the word with her sliding back in her chair and getting him to release her face in a way that wasn’t rude, just a way that showed she didn’t want to be touched like that right now.

“You’re kind of a dick,” she responded getting a deep rumble of a laugh to fall from Guy’s throat. That was probably too bold of a thing to say, especially since she had been working with him all day. “You haven’t looked at me once in four years. But suddenly you see me one night in Maggie’s apartment while you are fucking her and you end up liking my breasts. So now I’m okay?”

“Let’s work this out together,” his voice was deep, a rumble of a growl falling from his lips. In the moment his accent was quite thick and it made her sigh. She’d be a fool to say that Guy wasn’t attractive. He was. A lot of things about this man were very charming, but there was still that rage for him that she had. “Let me ask you this. What have you done in the last four years to make me notice you?”

“Exist?” she pointed out, her eyebrows full of emotion when she shifted uncomfortably before him in the seat. “Do you know how many times I passed you in the hallway or how many times you came into that office and you never saw me?”

“I don’t want to lie to you,” he began, thinking over what he was about to say and he threw his hands up in the air. “I’m not gonna hide it from you. I’m an asshole. I’m arrogant. I’m rude. I do think only a certain type of person deserves my time. But when you impress me, I will treat you very fucking well. I came from nothing, I worked my ass off to get here and I’ll be damned if someone tries to make me feel bad for that. Yes, I missed out on some incredible talent with you. I recognize that, but you accepted your position. If you would have come to me and talked to me. Maybe something would have happened.”

“Jesus,” she scoffed, looking away from Guy. It had a lump growing in her throat with how eerily familiar that sounded. “I have been hearing that kind of thing a lot lately.”

“It was a long time ago that I hired Maggie on. I like people that have influence over others and at the time I thought that was her. And I thought she had talent,” he rambled on, his voice growing rasp. “I’m assuming you applied at the same time and I was unimpressed by your resume. Or maybe I saw Maggie’s first and I stopped looking after Maggie’s. Did you ever think of that?”

After that comment? Yeah, she started to feel pretty stupid.

“What if I’m willing to give you the job I originally gave Maggie when she first started?” Guy offered up, simply shrugging his shoulders and sighing. “I’ll give you that empty office down the hall. It’s not as big as Maggie’s, but it is still nice. And I’ll sign you on with a higher pay than Maggie had originally.”

“Why?” she didn’t understand how all of a sudden Guy was willing to put himself out there and give her the one thing she had wanted for most of her life.

“Because you’ve impressed me and before you even suggest it’s because of your tits,” he interrupted her thought process, holding his finger up to motion her to wait. Moving around the table and back to his desk, he grabbed the drawing she helped him alter and set it down before her. “It’s not. Maggie saw this before she left. And she said nothing. You? You made it better. You have endless fucking knowledge of this company and you sat in the shittiest possible position for four years. So maybe I’m fucking impressed and willing to give you what it is you finally want.”

Swallowing down hard, she didn’t know what to say and it had Guy throwing his hands up again, “So, what’s your answer? If I’m willing to write up a contract, will you take the job?”

“When?” she breathed out, her eyes lifting as she adjusted again in her chair.

“I’ll have you keep working with me until the end of the year and then on the second, we’ll officially start you. I’ll start paying you now for it though,” Guy offered, lowering down to sit on the edge of the table again caressing his hands over his thighs. “I don’t know why you even look like you’re contemplating it. You would give yourself completely to me, right? And I mean in a workplace setting.”

“As much as I possibly can,” she agreed, nodding her head and tipping her head to the side when she considered her personal life. “While I would love to dedicate my entire life to things, I do have a daughter.”

“You have a…” Guy paused, his dark eyes growing big. “How did I not know that you have a daughter? What is your daughter’s name?”

“You didn’t know I existed five days ago,” she reminded him causing a dramatic roll of his eyes before he nodded with acknowledgement of her statement. “Her name is Jordyn. She’s eight years old and she comes first.”

“Jordyn? You mean like little Jordyn that runs around the office sometimes?” he muttered and it impressed her that Guy could even recognize a child in the office since he seemed so oblivious to the world around him. “You share a child with Maggie’s boyfriend?”

“Kind of,” she didn’t know how to answer that question, her chest aching at the thought. “Jordyn’s mom died when she was a baby and I’ve been taking care of her ever since. So while I’m not her biological mother, I’m…”

“Fuck that biological shit. My mother left me on the kitchen floor when I was two years old took off on me and I was raised by my stepmother who is more my mother than that bitch ever was,” Guy scoffed, waving his hand in the air dismissively. “Okay, then I understand. I will be understanding of you and your daughter. You have my word. I’ll work with you.”

Outstretching his hand, Guy held it before her and she knew that this was a big decision. There was the chance that Maggie could get angry with her, that Maggie would try to keep Jordyn away from her, but this was her dream. Leaning forward in the chair, she took Guy’s hand in hers and gave it a firm shake. With a faint smile, Guy released her and then headed over toward the desk to write a few things down.

“Okay, that’s enough work for today. Let me take you to dinner so we can celebrate your new job,” Guy offered reaching for his jacket to pull it on. Standing up from where she was seated, she headed for her belongings and started to put her jacket on too. “Do you like Italian food?”

“You’ve already bought me breakfast and lunch. Along with coffee,” she recalled with Guy stepping before her looking down upon her with his dark eyes. Amusement flooded his handsome features with her reminding him of all the things he had done for her today. “You want me to go home and sleep Guy. Tomorrow is Thursday. I have two more days of work to get through for you. And I haven’t slept all week.”

“Go to dinner with me, then you can go home and I’ll allow you to come in two hours late. How about that?” Guy stepped in close to her lowering his hands and making her nervous when he started to button her jacket together for her.

“You’re not my boss, Maggie is,” she reminded him of what the truth really was right now. “And I don’t think she’d be okay with that.”

“Well too damn bad. I’m Maggie’s boss which means I have the final say,” he nodded toward the door for her to leave. Grabbing her bag, she felt Guy’s hand pressing in over her lower back to lead her toward the elevator. It was strange walking through an empty office like this. Standing side by side with Guy felt awkward beneath the small amount of light that was still shining above them. Being this close to him had her heart hammering inside of her chest. Even though this was all still so nice, she couldn’t help but think of Negan’s warning yesterday about Guy wanting to have sex with her. And that might have been the only reason he was doing this. “I have to be honest with you about something. I lied. Maggie told me you applied on the night you came to her apartment. So yesterday I went back and found your resume. My assistant does a good job with filing things.”

That was a bizarre confession, especially since a few minutes ago he was acting like he didn’t even know that she applied, “And your resume was very impressive. Which does tell me I saw Maggie’s first. You had a hell of a recommendations list. All those professors backing you? Not one of them backed Maggie. Not even Negan Smith.”

“So you know his name?” she stammered, a smirk tugging at her features since he had only been referring to Negan as Maggie’s boyfriend. “Now do you know him for only being Maggie’s boyfriend or…”

“Everyone who is anyone knows who he is,” Guy stressed to her, giving her a quick glance from where she was standing. Moving forward, he pushed the button a few more times in irritation that the elevator wasn’t coming up faster. “I knew him from baseball and I knew of him from his work with the movies.”

“You hardly react when you see him,” she was impressed that Guy seemed to be a fan, but never showed it. “I would think you had no idea who he was if I had to make that kind of bet.”

“I can’t act like someone impresses me. It would look bad for me,” Guy admitted with a roll of his dark brown eyes. “Someone like me needs to pretend that they are the biggest person in the room. That’s just my attitude.”

“Maybe you can work a little on that,” she teased him drawing out another scoff from his lips. “Hey, people might like you better.”

“You’re a ball buster, you know that?” he smirked giving her an arch of his eyebrow. “The fact you let yourself be overshadowed for so long confuses me. You should have been walking into my office and demanding my attention. You would have gotten it if you let the real you shine through.”

“Good to know that my whole life I’ve been held back by not being too forward,” she noted realizing that it was a common thing everyone was telling her lately. An amused rumble fell from Guy with his handsome features locked on her. “Sorry.”

“No, I like the spiciness,” Guy explained, dropping his hands so that they were resting at his hips. “I do have a question though. And I hope it doesn’t offend you. Too much.”

“Oh boy,” she exhaled, finding herself entertained and preparing herself at the same time.

“Not once have you thrown yourself at me. We’ve been alone all day. And nothing,” Guy reminded her with a dramatic expression, tipping his head from side to side. “You didn’t even try to sneak in a grab here or there.”

“And neither did you,” she commented, clapping her hands together in a way that had Guy groaning under his breath in frustration. “I like working with you and we were just working. I want this job Guy. I don’t want to have sex with you.”

“I like working with you too,” Guy assured her, leaning forward and resting his shoulder against the wall. “But the question is still there. Why not make a move? Do you not find me attractive? Am I not your type?”

“Oh, you’re very much my type and you know you’re attractive. You use that to get what you want, which I applaud you for,” she responded, reaching out to place her hand in over his chest to pat over it in a playful manner. It had him flashing her a big smile that she knew in most cases she would be incredibly charmed by. “You’re hot. Your body is very nice. And if I met you in other circumstances, I would love to be fucked by you.”

“Jesus,” Guy slurred, his eyelids growing heavy with the way she just said that so straight forward. “I don’t understand what the problem is then. I’m attractive. You’re attractive. Why can’t two attractive people have sex?”

“You’re my boss,” she pointed out honestly finding herself wishing that the elevator would just make its way up to them. It was a few hours after what she assumed would be prime traffic time so she wasn’t understanding why it was taking so long. “That’s why?”

“Okay? And? We work good together. I bet we’d have good sex together,” Guy suggested, licking his lips and bobbing his head about. Most people would probably be offended by this point but she just found herself entertained with how hard he was trying. “Even today, we could have fucked on the desk and then got back to things. I can do that kind of thing.”

“I won’t lie to you Guy,” she began, stepping in closer to press her hand in over the side of his face. Unpredictably it made his eyes flutter to a close and she couldn’t believe she seemed to have that kind of effect on him at the moment. “I want you to respect me. And I want you to respect me for my work. Not because we had sex.”

Dragging her hand away, she went to hit the button a few more times with Guy’s dark brown eyes slowly fluttering to an open, “You were the person that I admired most going into this work. I’m flattered that you want to have sex with me and in most cases, I would jump at the idea. But I would rather be respected by you than fuck you.”

“God, you’re cute,” Guy scoffed, his nose wrinkling considering what she was saying. “I’m not just saying that because I am wildly attracted to you. I do respect you. The fact you haven’t slept with me? That says a lot. Usually most people I throw myself at don’t put up a fight.”

“I’m not surprised by that,” she chuckled, thankful that the elevator looked like it was starting to head up toward them. “You lay it on thick.”

“Maybe, but? I do mean it though. I will still respect you if we end up having sex,” Guy whispered causing her to burst out laughing. He laughed in response, throwing his hands up in the air as they spoke almost in a defense. “And I will still want you to work for me.”

“Do you just want to jerk off and come on my tits?” she inquired, her eyebrow arching in curiosity surprising him with her bluntness. “I mean, that’s what you focused pretty heavily on the other night in Maggie’s apartment.”

“You have nice breasts,” Guy defended himself, placing his hand firmly in over the center of his chest. “You can’t blame a guy for taking a shot at it.”

“I’ll accept the compliment,” she rolled her eyes nodding toward the elevator again. “But I don’t want to be like Maggie. I’m not going to let you come on my tits. No matter how hot the visual might be.”

“So you like the idea of me coming on your tits,” he commented getting a glare from her in response. “Okay, okay. You don’t have to be so sassy about it. But you telling me no? It just makes me want you so much more.”

“That’s typically how it goes,” she reasoned with Guy knowing that when someone had everything they had a hard time being denied when they finally were. She saw it with Maggie and she could see it with him. “You also had sex with Maggie by the way which really just makes me uncomfortable.”

“Now that is a lie,” Guy cracked with the doors opening up to the elevator. Holding his hand out, he let her get on the elevator first with her giving an odd expression. “You don’t care that I had sex with Maggie. I get there is some kind of thing going on between you and her, but if anything? If you really wanted to, I think your sex would be incredible because you’d have something to prove. To show me that you are better than her.”

“I am better than her,” she stammered, leaning back at her corner of the elevator. “I’m very good at what I do. I know my body well and I pay attention to details. Very well. If I rode your cock I would have you addicted to me, that’s how good I am.”

Some of the color drained from Guy’s face with his lips parting. Looking down toward his pants, Guy laughed and let out a tense breath, “And here I was thinking you were a good girl. You just made my dick hard by saying that. And you want me to act normal toward you? That shit just went out the window. I’m gonna picture you fucking riding the shit out of me all the time now. Every time I look at you.”

She couldn’t help laughing at the situation, he was throwing it out at her so she was just throwing it back at him using something similar that Daryl had told her the other night, “Thank you by the way.”

“For what? Getting an erection?” Guy grumbled under his breath, shoving his hands into his pockets to try to get the material pulled away from his body. “Or because I haven’t forced myself on you after that comment? Because if that’s the case, what’s the fun in that shit? I’d really much rather you wanting to do it.”

“No, not that,” she was quick to shake her head knowing that he was focusing pretty heavily still on the sex stuff. “You’ve actually really brought my self-esteem up. I wasn’t feeling too good about myself lately, but having someone as hot as you wanting to sleep with me? It’s kind of elevated things for me.”

“Oh, don’t tell people that I brought your self-esteem up. I might actually start to get known for being a good person,” Guy groaned, dramatically acting disgusted at the thought. “We need people to think I’m a bitchy asshole. It sells so much better than a nice, ego lifting person.”

“Wouldn’t want that,” she teased, shaking her head firmly. “You make me laugh. I think I should be offended by the things you say, but you make me laugh.”

“It’s because I’m good looking. If I was ugly and gross, you’d probably be offended,” Guy suggested throwing his hands up in the air getting a shocked expression from her. “Let’s be realistic here, I should have you running and getting me in trouble. But you’re one, too dedicated to this job and two, you’re flattered by it. You just told me that.”

“Did you go after Maggie this hard?” she couldn’t help but wonder getting a tiny laugh from Guy. “I assume the two of you are close.”

“No, I sleep with Maggie when I’m horny. Well, okay. No. I’m horny all the time. I sleep with Maggie when the opportunity presents itself and I have nothing else,” Guy explained to her, his head shaking as he spoke. “Maggie threw herself at me during something like what we just did together. I’m not going to turn away a blowjob by someone beautiful. You can call me an asshole for fucking around with someone who is dating another person, but I just don’t care. If someone wants to have sex with me and they are hot? As long as I have a condom or they do? I’m fucking ready to go. And even though Maggie is dating Mr. Smith there, I’m pretty sure she’s infatuated with that pizza boy. She only fucks me because she wants me to be in awe of her, but she’s just a fuck for me. I don’t view her as anything beyond that.”  

“That pizza boy?” she repeated what Guy had just said, her heart skipping a beat. What the hell did that mean?

“Yeah, the cute one that comes by all the time. Maggie is always buying pizza for the office just to see him,” Guy rambled on, waving his hand about when the elevator doors opened once they reached the main floor. “And no one really eats the pizza. Consider where we work honey. It’s obvious that it’s to get to see that cute boy.”

“I had no idea,” she admitted realizing that for once she didn’t pick up on the small details. Stepping forward, Guy placed his hand in over her lower back urging her forward out of the elevator. “I guess you have a better eye for detail than I do.”

“That’s why I’m the boss,” Guy winked, his fingers curling around her wrist to get her to stop. “So you do think I’m attractive though? For my ego.”

“Yes, I think you’re attractive,” she chuckled having his face flush over with red. “Why does the top fashion designer that used to be a model need me to tell them that they are good looking? You know you are.”

“Because you’re the only person crazy enough to tell me no,” Guy frowned, dropping his hands to his hips when he stood before her. “Okay. How about this? If you’re ever feeling incredibly depressed. I mean like…super, super down. We can pretend that you don’t work for me. You can show up at my apartment and we can spend hours having sex. I will happily work to make you feel better. It won’t change our working environment at all.”

“I’ll think about it,” she knew that it wasn’t going to be something that she would be brave enough to really do, but with Guy snapping his fingers at her, she knew that he saw it as hope. “It’s very unlikely you know.”

“Unlikely still means there is a chance,” he debated with a small laugh causing her to roll her eyes again. “And I promise it won’t change the fact I have respect for you and still want you to work for me. And the work environment thing…I mean, if you want to have sex in the bathrooms or something, that’d be kind of hot, but…”

“Enough,” she pushed at the center of his chest having his laugh growing since she was amused with his over-the-top antics. “You’re not what I pictured. You know that?”

“Right, you thought I was gay,” Guy responded, his eyebrow arching showing that he had heard her conversation with Maggie when they were at Maggie’s apartment. It had her stopping in her tracks, panicked when she realized that he knew that. “One thing I also have is incredible hearing.”

“I’m so sorry,” she was worried with how Guy would respond and he dramatically shook his head. “You heard all of that mess then. I’m sorry. You should have never heard all of that drama. And the things that were said about you.”

“Mhmm…” Guy smirked when she stopped to stare up at him. “I’m not offended that you thought I was gay Y/N. Most people probably assume that. I think Maggie did too until she saw me flirt with someone. I’m also aware why you won’t sleep with me. You know, beyond the whole wanting me to respect you thing.”

“And why is that?” she wondered, her heart skipping a beat when Guy pointed behind her. Looking over her shoulder, she let out a long exhale when she saw that Negan was sitting in the waiting area. Once they locked eyes, Negan stumbled to get up from the chair.

“You’re twitterpated with Maggie’s man,” Guy was quiet enough so that only she could hear him. “And I say fuck him. He wants to fuck you too. Look at the way he’s staring out at you with those puppy dog eyes. Desperate for your attention.”

“I don’t…” she shook her head, looking to Guy who gave her a smirk. “We’re just friends.”

“Right,” Guy smacked her ass as he stepped beyond her drawing out a tiny yelp from her. “We’ll take a raincheck on that dinner. Why don’t you go work your cowgirl skills on that man. And if you come in two hours late tomorrow, I’ll fully understand. I know what I would do if I were you right now and it would be to drain that beautiful man dry.”

“Guy!” she gasped at how forward he was being when he gave her a wink and headed for the doors.

Instead of responding, he just headed out of the building allowing Negan to approach her. Holding his cell phone at his side, Negan looked between her and then to the doors where Guy had left, “Negan? What are you doing here?”

“I uh…” Negan rubbed at the back of his neck showing the discomfort in his body. “I was waiting for you?”

“This long?” she replied with Negan giving her a small nod. Considering her work schedule normally would have had her getting off work hours ago, she wondered how long Negan had been sitting there waiting for her. “Why?”

“A few reasons really,” Negan began, his thick eyebrows bouncing up as he shoved his phone back into his pocket. “He didn’t…he didn’t hurt you, right? Like, force you to have sex or anything?”

“No, no he didn’t,” she promised him realizing that there was a genuine worry that Guy would have forcefully thrown himself on her. “We didn’t have sex. I won’t let that happen. I told you that.”

“I know you did,” Negan seemed shy in the moment, pulling his jacket closer to his body with him tipping his head back. “I was wondering if you wanted to go out and get a drink with me or something.  Maybe go somewhere to eat?”

“Why didn’t you just call me?” she wondered, realizing that she may have tried to end her workday earlier if Negan would have let her know that he was here. “You would have known I was working late and you wouldn’t have had to sit here that long.”

“I was afraid you wouldn’t have answered,” Negan explained, his hazel eyes filled with an emotion she couldn’t read. After last night? He was probably right. Things were complicated now. They were no longer friends. They were something else. Two people who did something wrong. “Please? Can we just hang out and go somewhere?”

“I’m not sure that’s the best idea,” she admitted, wishing that she may have had warning to prepare herself for whatever she could say to Negan.

“Why not?” Negan frowned, his posture slouching forward with him visibly disappointed. “We’re friends. We should be able to hang out sometimes. Right? Just the two of us?”

“Because you’re Maggie’s boyfriend,” she reminded Negan hating to admit it, but it was true. There seemed to be a desperation in his features and she didn’t understand why. “Why are you suddenly so eager to spend time with me?”

“Why are you suddenly so eager to not want to spend time with me?” Negan threw that back out at her with her frowning. They were pretty much talking right now like what happened last night didn’t. And it made things weird. “We were so close for so long. Is it wrong for me to want that again? I just want the two of us to be close again. I miss you. I miss us.”

“And what about Maggie?” she brought up the elephant in the room. The thing that made all of this more complicated. “Doesn’t she want you home?”

“Maggie is supposed to meet up with her family tonight. So it doesn’t matter anyways,” Negan declared, reaching out to curl his fingers around her wrist loosely after she went to turn away from him. “Jordyn is spending the night at a friend’s house. And I want to spend my time with you. Please.”

“Damn it,” she cussed under her breath. With those big hazel eyes and the way his expression looked truthfully incredibly pathetic, she couldn’t tell him no. It was his way of begging and she always had a very hard time telling him no. “Fine. We can go somewhere to hang out and talk for a while. Just nothing too extensive, okay?”

“I saw a place right down the street. I’ve heard people talk about it a few times. I know you love Christmas and it’s like a sports bar that really decorated heavily for the holidays,” Negan’s fingers stretched out to hook with hers to lead her toward the door. Following him, she didn’t know how to react with him wanting to hold her hand while they walked. Right now would have been the perfect time for one of them to say something, but they didn’t. There were small flurries of snow falling from the sky as they walked down the busy street together. When they got to the place, Negan led her toward the door. From the outside they could tell that it was busy. But that was pretty normal for New York in general. Especially around the holidays. Stepping inside had the both of them pausing immediately to gaze upon the place they had just entered. Negan wasn’t wrong. It looked like the North Pole exploded and this was created. It was very much in your face and it had the both of them gazing upon the many decorations that people were up and out of their seats looking at. “Uhm, whoa.”

“You’re not kidding,” she knew that she liked Christmas, but this was very extensive. There were so many decorations hanging from the ceiling, covering the walls and set up on the floor that she was surprised there was any room at all. “Wow would be an understatement.”

“Well hello there, welcome to the jolliest place on Earth,” the host greeted them at the door and by the expression over the woman’s face they both could tell that she was sick of repeating that welcome. Reaching for something from behind the counter, she grabbed a set of reindeer antlers moving forward to place them on Y/N first. Lifting her eyes, she heard the antlers jangle from the bells that were hanging from them. Of course it was hilarious for Negan until the host put a set on him as well. Standing frozen at the entrance, she knew they were both debating if this was the place they should have been right now. “Would you like to sit downstairs today at one of the tables or would you like to go upstairs in the bar area?”

“Is upstairs quieter?” Negan wondered, his nose wrinkling when he looked around the first floor to see how many people were there with children climbing all over things. “Maybe there is an area that is a little more private for two people to be able to…talk?”

“Upstairs would certainly be that for you since it’s more adult themed,” the host waved them on, moving for the stairs with them both cautiously following her up them. “You will get the occasional person from downstairs wanting to come up to see the decorations up here, but a majority of them are downstairs. You’ll have a better time up here.”

Uncomfortably Negan cleared his throat with his eyes lifting to look up. Giant red ornaments were hanging above them and the stairs had garland covering them. The second floor was definitely the better place to be. Up here? There were more televisions than there were downstairs. She assumed on a game night this would be very busy, but since it wasn’t there were only a few stragglers around or people just looking at the decorations that remained on the second floor. Downstairs there were loads of families wanting to spend the holiday together. Up here? It seemed like most of the people were solo just getting off work wanting a drink and a place to relax. It felt like two completely different places. Except for the overabundance of decorations

Leading them toward the far corner of the bar area, the woman motioned them to take a seat. No one else was near them and if they were? They weren’t paying attention. Thankfully they were tucked away so they could have some peace.

Y/N was the first to sit after they took their jackets off and when Negan lowered himself down across from her, the bells on his antlers rang causing his cheeks to flush over with embarrassment. Laughing to herself, she reached out across the table to tap playfully at the bells. By doing that she received a glare from Negan that had her bursting out in laughter.

“It’s not funny,” Negan frowned, allowing her to continue to swat at the bells on the antlers. No one else on the second floor was wearing those fucking things so he didn’t know why the host put the antlers on them.

“Oh, it’s hilarious,” she corrected him, having a hell of a time. She was certain that she looked ridiculous, but she was getting a kick out of screwing with Negan. “Look at you. You look so cute with that on. You picked a great place. I’m glad I agreed to this.”

“I’m glad you’re having fun,” Negan scoffed with her reaching for her phone to pull it out to take a photo of Negan who just stared out at her. There was a strong red color in Negan’s cheeks showing that he was embarrassed. His dimples were prominent and she knew he didn’t want his photo taken, but she didn’t care. Multiple photos were snapped and it had Negan growling out under his breath. “Have you had enough?”

“Not yet,” she snickered, reaching out to grab his chin to give it a small shake. It had the antlers jangling again with her bursting out in laughter.

“You know you have them on too,” Negan reminded her, lifting his hand to flick at a bell that was on hers. “Who are you even showing those photos to? Why did you need so fucking many?”

“Oh, it’s for me and I plan to show Jordyn,” she answered with a bright smile, sweeping her thumb over Negan’s jawline. “You are adorable. You see, I’m nowhere near as embarrassed as you are. Your cheeks are so red. I’m used to making myself look like an idiot, but you? Nah. This has you all embarrassed and it’s cute.”

“Thank you,” Negan huffed, his eyebrows furrowing after she finally let go of his face. Snorting out, Negan rolled his eyes, but decided to keep the antlers on. Not because he wanted to, but because she seemed so fucking happy. In other circumstances, he may have taken them off, but with her so amused? He decided to keep them on. When the waiter came to the table, Negan grunted at the list of drinks that they gave them. It was very Christmas themed and at that point in time, he wasn’t in the mood for something that was overly, flavorful? “Can I just have a bottle of beer please? Something good.”

Ordering the same thing, Y/N observed that it seemed to make the waiter happy that he didn’t have to put on a big show for them. The way they were dressed there had her assuming that they were supposed to be Santa’s elves. This place was amusing to say the least. After he left, she turned her attention to the televisions that they had in there. Out of the corner of her eye, she could tell that Negan’s attention was fully on her while she was still taking everything in.

Tapping his hands against the top of the table, Negan wished she would have been focused on him again instead, “Why were you working so late tonight?”

“Guy wanted me to work with him personally,” she explained, accepting the bottle that the waiter brought for her first. Taking a sip of the drink, she didn’t even seem remotely bothered by the idea that she was working late. Clearing his throat, Negan got her to look at him and she shrugged. “What?”

“Just like that? Nothing more?” Negan thought about what both her and Maggie said with Guy wanting to have sex with her. How long he waited for her downstairs had him worried. Seeing so many people leave and knowing that Y/N was still working didn’t sit well with Negan. “He didn’t…force himself on you or anything?”

“No, I told you. And if he did try to force himself on me I would have knocked him on his ass. Don’t worry about it,” she waved her hand about in the air dismissively, but it wasn’t a thought that he so quickly wanted to let go of. Telling him not to worry only had him worrying more. “We’ve talked about things. He knows that I don’t want to sleep with him and he’s accepted it. Kind of.”

“Kind of?” Negan repeated, his throat tensing up at the idea of Y/N’s boss making it obvious that he wanted to sleep with her. Most people wouldn’t be this nonchalant about that kind of thing. Last night, when Negan showed up at Y/N’s place, he expected her to immediately accept the job offer he gave her. Not continue to stay in a work environment where she was being sexually harassed. “How do you deal with something like that?”

“You haven’t touched your drink,” she ignored the question, pointing toward the bottle that was in front of Negan. Avoiding answering him was the best option right now. Especially if Negan found out that she accepted a position that Guy had offered her. What was supposed to be a moment where the two of them hung out was becoming something where Negan was solely focused on her work relationship with Guy. That wasn’t something she wanted him to do. “Are you hungry? Do you want to order some food or something?”

“I don’t…” Negan paused, reaching out to place his hand in over hers to get her attention back on him when she started looking around the bar again. Frustration flooded throughout him and it was visible in the way that he looked at her. “I don’t understand. Why are you acting like nothing happened?”

“Because nothing happened. I just worked with him the whole time,” she promised him, but when she answered him he licked his lips uncomfortably and it was obvious that’s not what he meant.

“I meant with the two of us,” Negan corrected her original assumption of what he was asking her about. “You’re acting like yesterday didn’t happen. First with the changing room and then last night…”  

“Because I have to,” she swallowed down hard, drinking more of the beer that she had ordered. Suddenly, she felt like the room was severely hot around them. “I can’t focus on something that was an accident that shouldn’t have happened. I had been harassing you for over a day. I upset you. And you felt guilty. It’s okay. We both got tied up in a moment.”

“Your account of things are vastly different than mine,” Negan frowned, pushing his drink forward and leaning further back in his seat. There seemed to be so much on Negan’s mind that he wanted to talk about, but he was having a hard time getting it out. “All I keep thinking about is you. About the way that it felt inside of you…”

Choking, she set the bottle down and felt like the world was spinning around her with the way Negan’s eyes were on her.  Silence followed with Negan nodding his head. Suddenly she wished she was anywhere but here. Shifting in the seat, she tried to focus on one of the things that was on the television but realized that it was a commercial on pretty much every screen.

“Does it really help to talk about this?” she questioned, keeping her head down so she didn’t have to focus on him. “What is talking about this really going to do for either one of us other than make me feel worse about things?”

“Why worse? I would think this was something you would want,” Negan stammered, his throat tensing up when he looked around the room making sure that people were distracted. “After everything I’ve heard, I would think that you would be happy to have me this hooked on you.”

“You’re still dating Maggie, right?” she interrupted Negan’s thought process, having a rush of color flooding into his face. Just by that reaction, she didn’t need an answer. She chuckled shaking her head in disbelief. “You say one thing and your actions do another.”

“You’re acting like I spent a lot of time with Maggie and I didn’t. After everything, I went home and I checked to make sure that Jordyn was okay. Then I went and slept on the couch. I didn’t even go back into my bedroom,” Negan recalled what happened in their time apart from one another. “When I woke up in the morning, we maybe talked a few minutes before she left the place.”

“You don’t have to defend yourself for talking to your girlfriend,” she declared, shaking her head in disbelief that they were ever having this kind of conversation. “I just can’t think of things a certain way if you are still with her.”

“Okay, but hear me out for a second,” Negan pled with her, his right hand lifting from the table to wave it between the two of them. “I just need to know that if I do give this whole thing up, that you are willing to be in a relationship with me. That there is some kind of possibility between the two of us. That there is a future in this.”  

“Not with you dating Maggie,” her words were firm stressing to him the importance of that fact alone. “The problem I have with what happened last night Negan is that you didn’t want to be a cheater again. What happened between you and Lucille? You swore to never be that person again. But we started having sex last night Negan. We did something…”

“This is different,” Negan defended, the vein at the side of his neck bulging slightly. Hearing that felt like a copout and it had her scoffing. “It is different. When I was sleeping around on Lucille, I didn’t have feelings for the people I was cheating with. It was just something to do to make myself feel better. Whereas the two of us have a history. We have something here between us.”

“Since when?” she snapped hating to be so negative, but it was hard not to be. A large amount of color flooded into Negan’s face with him dropping his head down and huffing out. “My whole point Negan is that this thing with me? Cheating? It’s making you someone you never wanted to be.”

“Yeah, well…” Negan licked his lips, but what could he say to that? It was hard hiding things from her because she was probably the person that knew him the most. “I never said I was a good guy. You knew that. And you still wanted me. Right? You still want me, don’t you?”

“Negan,” she had a hard time approaching the subject feeling suddenly very much on the spot. “If this was happening four years ago? Yes, I would have been in heaven. But a few days ago I was listening to people tell me how in love you were with Maggie. If we do something? It will be just like when you were with Lucille. You’ll feel guilty about your affair and you won’t leave Maggie. You will just ghost me even more. And that? That scares me. Because if Maggie finds out, I could potentially lose everything with Jordyn because Maggie will be furious with you. Having an affair? It could take Jordyn away from me. And she’s everything to me.”

“Nothing is gonna take Jordyn away from you,” Negan persisted, his voice deep and raspy with the lines in his forehead creasing further. Hearing that she was scared of losing Jordyn had his chest aching at the thought of it. “Nothing.”

“Easier said than done,” she couldn’t help feeling emotional in the moment with the thought of no longer having Jordyn in her life. “I love your daughter.”

“And she loves you. I’m not separating the two of you,” Negan promised, his hand stretching out to cover hers. Being assured that she would never lose that bond was a good thing, but Negan had also told her a long time ago that they would always be incredibly close. So she didn’t know what to believe. Gradually pulling her hand away from Negan had him frowning. “And as far as comparing Maggie to Lucille? The love that I had for Lucille? It’s nowhere near the same thing. It’s not. I don’t feel guilty for what happened last night. I don’t.”

“Negan, I know you better than anyone. I know the way your brain thinks,” she circled her finger in his direction, having Negan drop his head down and the sound of the bells jangling drew a laugh from her throat. How was she supposed to keep this conversation serious with those damn antlers on Negan’s head? “Right now you may not be feeling guilty about what we did. Things are emotional right now. They are brand new so they feel addictive. You yearn for them. But eventually? Realization is going to hit you that you had a four-year relationship with Maggie. One you worked really hard on. So while you may feel good in the moment? These feelings you are having? They are going to die down.”

“No, no. I don’t think so,” Negan was being defiant with what she was saying, grunting when the sound of the bells came again when he shook his head. “If I would have had sex with you when I was married to Lucille? Yeah, it would have been bad. Both because of the abuse of power with the whole professor thing and…”

“Break up with Maggie and then we will talk,” she cut him off, her eyebrows bouncing up with Negan scoffing. Reaching for his phone, Negan started to type something out and she was quick to snag it. Looking to what he had up, she shook her head and let out a frustrated sound. “Were you really just going to dump her through text messages? You can’t do that.”

“I can. And I’m going to,” Negan countered reaching for his phone, but she was quick to pull it away from him. “Why can’t I? You wanted me to dump her. And I will. To prove to you what this means to me. I’ll do it right fucking now.”

“You need to think more clearly about this,” she suggested, lowering his phone down and keeping it in her hand. “This is a four-year relationship you have had. I saw the way you talked about Maggie. You’re not thinking clearly.”

“For the first time in a long fucking time, I’m thinking clearer than I ever have,” Negan reasoned with her, throwing his hands up and he looked stressed. “My eyes are open to the way things really are and it’s you I keep thinking about. Please stop being so fucking stubborn.”

“If you liked me as much as you claim to, why now?” she wanted an answer from Negan, who bit down hard on his bottom lip. “What’s so different now? Four years ago I would have been falling at your feet. I was at the end of my school year, so your whole I was a professor skit doesn’t work for me Negan. I think you’re high off an emotion because I was honest with you. And you’re fucking with me.”

“I’m not,” Negan defended himself, placing his hand in over the center of his chest. “I was stupid back then. We’ve already had this discussion. Last night…I realized what an idiot I was. A huge fucking idiot. I don’t know what I was thinking over the last few years. I just thought we were supposed to be friends. There were so many times I wanted to, but I was your professor and…”

“You slept with my best friend,” she dug that in, leaning further back in the seat that she was in. “I don’t care what you say. If you felt something for me, you wouldn’t have fucked Maggie.”

“I made a…” Negan realized that he was about to call Maggie a mistake which had him pausing to think about his words. But with how he was feeling right now? That’s how things felt. Because with all the thoughts he had been having, he was comparing how different his life would have been if he made the choice to pick Y/N instead of Maggie. And he realized his life would have been much better off in his opinion if he hadn’t allowed himself to fall for Maggie. “I made a mistake.”

“You don’t think that,” she half laughed and Negan hated that she was having a hard time even looking at him. “We shouldn’t even be having this kind of conversation when you are still with her.”

“You took my phone, so I can’t break up with her,” Negan scoffed, holding his hand out toward where his phone was.

“You don’t break up with someone over the phone or through text messages. Even though I can’t stand Maggie, that’s really fucked up,” she complained, her face scrunching up in disgust at the idea. “And if you break up through text and not in person, it lacks that personal connection. It needs to be done face to face. Because through text? Maggie will just come to you, guilt you and this will be the same conversation all over again.”

“I don’t understand. Do you want me to dump Maggie or not?” Negan thought aloud, confusion flooding his features. There was so much going on. She told him to dump Maggie, but when he went to do it, she stopped him. “Listen, all I keep thinking about is you, and after last night? After last night, all I want is you. I laid awake at night thinking about the small amount of time that I was in you. The way it felt to be wrapped up in your arms and the way you look at me.”

“I’ve always looked at you like this,” she reminded him with a saddened sound. “I probably looked at you better in those first four years. You say you wanted to sleep with me. Yet when you had the chance, it was Maggie you fell for. I just can’t stop thinking about you showing up with those flowers for her. And then showing up to see you sleeping with her…”

“I wish I could go back,” Negan struggled to find the right words, stuttering as he spoke. In this moment, it was hard to look at her. Because he knew that she was right. “I loved being around you. You made me so happy. It’s just Maggie made the first move and I fell for it. I hadn’t had sex in so long and I let my dick guide me.”

“Negan, the young girl inside of me wants to fall for this. Because that young girl? You were everything to her. And she would have done anything for you,” she recognized the person she had always been when it came to Negan, “but the way you looked at her? And the way you talked about her…”

Stopping herself from getting any more emotional about this whole thing, she stood up from the table and it had Negan sitting forward, “Where are you going?”

Tugging the antlers from her head, she set them down on top of the table and swallowed down hard, “I’m going to use the restroom. I need a moment.”

“Hey,” Negan called out to her, but she was quick to head in the other direction needing that time just to calm her emotions.

Following the signs to the restroom, she headed toward the bathroom that had a big photo of Mrs. Claus on the front of it. Considering the other had Santa on the door, she was pretty sure that she was heading to the right place. Pushing the door open made her stop in her tracks at what the inside of the bathroom looked like. String lights surrounded the top of it with decorations flooding the walls. Looking to the stalls, she saw that the doors were wrapped in paper with bows on them. There was no need for the bathroom to look like this, but it did. “Holy shit.”

The sound of the door pressing open was heard and she looked back over her shoulder to see that it was Negan entering the bathroom behind her, “Negan, Jesus. There was a time where I wanted this from you and now that I need space from you, I can’t get you to leave me the fuck alone.”

Stopping when he got to the center of the bathroom, Negan looked around the room with amusement at just how ridiculous it looked. It made both of them laugh even though it was a tense moment, “I know.”

Still, Negan said nothing. Which made her uncomfortable. Stepping forward had her stepping back until Negan had her cornered, “Negan?”

Lifting his hand, he dragged his fingers across her bare shoulder and down over the length of her arm. In that moment, his eyes never left hers. It had her shaking when he dragged his fingers back up over her shoulder.

“Please…” she didn’t know how to respond with Negan’s fingers grasping faintly at the strap of her dress. Pushing it down over her shoulder, Negan nervously licked his lips. Waiting for her to stop him just in case, he realized she wasn’t going to. Loosening the material allowed the front of her dress to drop down in over her breast revealing it to him. There was a vulnerability to her right now with her tremoring before him. Dragging his hand down over her shoulder toward her chest, Negan circled his thumb in over the nipple that was exposed. Arching her back forward closed the distance between the two of them. Negan’s eyelids grew heavy with want, his head dropping down for him to start pressing kisses over her shoulder. “You don’t want this.”

Hushing her had her whimpering with the vibration of it against her skin. Kissing down the same path his fingers traveled had her head tipping back against the corner of the wall. Each caress was wet, lingering and the warmth of his tongue flicked against her skin. The added sensation of his short beard scratching at her flesh felt amazing as his lips traveled between the valley of her breasts. Licking his lips, Negan tipped his head back palming at her breast. Stealing a quick glance at her, Negan hummed and pressed forward to kiss at the underside of her breast. Starting off with tiny kisses, they grew in strength as he continued peppering them over her flesh. Sticking out his tongue, he dragged it out flat against her skin having her purr at the sensation. Circling her nipple with the tip of his tongue had her breathing loudly, her fingers lifting up to caress at the back of his head. Once his lips surrounded her nipple it had her purring out, a moan following.

Forcing herself to look at him, she sank her fingers into his thick, dark hair. Watching him was something she truthfully didn’t want to miss. Panting, she felt a fire flooding through her veins with the way he looked. It seemed like he was enjoying himself while he teased her nipple into a taut bud. Varying between kisses, soft suckling and teases of his tongue. Pulling away with a wet sound, his lips parted while he worked to get the material of her dress down over her other breast. Quickly, his mouth covered her other breast pampering it just as he had done the other. Moans were escaping his throat, tickling at her flesh. All of this was driving her body to warm up rapidly. Her heart was hammering away inside of her chest.

“Negan,” she moaned out his name having him growl against her flesh, sucking tenderly at her nipple. Drawing her closer to him, Negan’s hands settled at her hips. Squeezing them firmly, he pulled his mouth from her body with his long eyelashes fluttering.

Dropping down to his knees in front of her, Negan kept his eyes locked on hers. Biting down on his bottom lip, his hands caressed over the backs of her legs massaging at her body. Dropping her hand down, her fingers swept in over Negan’s jawline with his head turning to kiss at the center of her palm. Tipping his head back, Negan growled out with her dragging her thumb out across his bottom lip.

“You are so fucking beautiful,” Negan slurred, his hands sliding further up toward her thighs. Pushing at the bottom of her dress, Negan worked it up toward her hips. Curling his fingers around the back of her thighs, he squeezed at the flesh that was there. Caressing further up, his hands palmed at her bottom before hooking his fingers into the hem of her panties. Unhurriedly pulling them down had her tremoring before him. Broken breaths were falling from her lips with his hazel eyes locked on hers. Getting her panties to her feet, Negan helped her step out of the material. Still not breaking his stare, Negan pushed her panties into his pocket and licked his lips. Finally dropping his eyes, he gazed upon her most private parts and it made him suck in a sharp breath of air. Sliding in closer to her, Negan started pressing kisses at her inner thigh. “If you want me to stop, just tell me…”

This is where she should have said something, but she didn’t. She liked the way the warmth of his mouth felt against her flesh. The way his short beard scratched faintly at her skin also felt incredible. Bracing one of her hands over his shoulders, she knew if she didn’t that her trembling legs might start to give out on her. There was something in the way that Negan’s hands were caressing at her thighs and her hips that could affect her more than anyone else had when they touched her.

Soon his kisses were moving in over her hips causing her to whimper. The warmth of his breath was lingering over her center with Negan gazing up at her again. Caressing in over her inner thigh, Negan allowed his hand to trail up toward her center. Palming in over her body had her tipping her head back with a small purr escaping her lips.

Leaning in, Negan faintly kissed at her body getting her to shudder upon the contact. Every kiss was teasing at first. Just testing the water of things. But soon his tongue flicked out against her flesh. Dragging the tip of it along the length of her sex had her tremoring against him. The sounds he made were the most delicious thing and it fueled him. Growling against her flesh had her hips arching up to him and he had to grab a firm hold of her to keep her in place. Crying out, her fingers sank deeply into his hair, her whole body tensing up when his tongue traveled the same path up and then down. Circling her clit before suckling at her sensitive folds.

Watching him pleasuring her had her heart skipping beats. Continuously he pressed wet kisses against her body, suckling at her flesh and teasing the length of his tongue over the areas he was learning had her reacting the most. It looked like Negan thoroughly enjoyed what he was doing, taking his time to build up the sensation of it all for her.

Humming against her flesh, Negan dragged the length of his tongue up her folds before teasing at her clit. Tenderly slurping at the sensitive bundle of nerves had her crying out. Pampering her flesh with wet kisses and skillful caresses of his tongue had her biting down on her moans in attempts to keep quiet. Lazily shaking his head side to side, he drew out z-shaped lines against her flesh drawing her to rock against his movements. Pulling back with a wet sound, his fingers lifted to caress at her flesh with his hazel eyes hungrily locking with hers. There was something about the way he looked at her that made her feel like the only woman in the world in that moment. His pupils were dilated, his lips wet and his breathing loud. Everything about this showed that he was enjoying what he was doing yet desperate to see how she looked.

The rough pads of his fingertips circled her clit before dragging down the length of her sex toward her heated center. Keeping his eyes locked on hers, Negan pressed a finger unhurriedly into her and it made him smirk with the undeniable moan that escaped her lips. Even though she was trying to hide it, she had a hard time with the length of his slender digit sliding into her warmth.

Even the way he smiled at her had the desire she felt for him growing. Starting to thrust his finger inside of her, Negan pressed forward to focus on her sensitive bundle of nerves with his talented mouth. Wet sounds were filling the small bathroom with him pleasuring her and soon he added a second finger inside of her.

Dropping her head back, her eyes slammed shut with how good everything felt. Maybe this was all so enhanced with the potential of them getting caught too. This was a busy place. It was very likely that someone could have come in at any time. Yet neither one of them seemed to care. Every motion of his mouth over her grew in strength with her tugging harder at his hair.

“That’s it,” Negan coached her with a deep rumble of a growl, his words vibrating against her flesh. A loud slurping sound followed having her thighs a trembling mess. Forcing herself to watch him, she could tell that he was actually finding pleasure in what he was doing with the way he was moaning against her body. Shaking his head from side to side, Negan’s long eyelashes fluttered to a close. Everything felt like it was spinning with a liquid warmth rushing to her core.

“Negan,” her fingers curled tighter into his hair when he got her to an orgasm between his fingers and his mouth having her a shaking mess against him.

Leaning back on his knees, Negan looked up at her with a proud expression. Licking his lips, Negan hummed when he pulled his fingers from her body and she let out a whimper. Starting to kiss up over the lengths of her abdomen, Negan suckled at her nipple before returning his mouth to hers. The taste of her lingered over his lips and she purred out with Negan’s tongue brushing against hers. By the way her legs felt, she wondered if Negan’s hands weren’t holding onto her if she would have been able to stand. Kiss after hungry kiss kept her worries from escaping her until she firmly grabbed a hold of Negan’s shirt and pushed him forward against the counter. Hissing out, Negan’s hazel eyes narrowed and a wicked smirk tugged at his handsome features.

Closing the distance between them, she palmed in over the center of Negan’s pants causing him to let out a deep rumble of a moan. His eyelids grew heavy with want as she swiftly started to undo his pants. How easily she managed to get the material apart surprised Negan. Reaching her hand inside, she stroked at his length realizing that he was completely rigid beneath her touch.

“This is what you do to me,” Negan informed her with a rumble of a growl, tipping his head back and sucking in a sharp breath when she started kissing over the side of his neck. Pressing his right hand back, Negan braced himself against the counter when she lowered down to her knees. Caressing at the back of her head with his left hand, Negan winced when she pulled him out of the tight confines of his pants. Stroking at his girthy length had Negan’s hips bouncing forward, panting at the way she confidently caressed at his body. “Fuck…”

Brazenly she leaned forward and started pressing wet kisses at the tip of Negan’s manhood enjoying the sounds he made when she did it. Dragging her tongue out across the slit had her collecting the taste of him, his hips bouncing forward toward her. While it would have been nice to drag things out, she knew that they were in the middle of a public bathroom. In a very, very busy place. All it would take was someone downstairs coming up here to go to a less busy bathroom.

Lifting her stare, she watched Negan’s reaction when she took the tip between her lips. A moan escaped him, the vein at his neck became more prominent and his eyes fluttered to a tight close. His fingers were stronger at the back of her neck sliding in over her scalp with the wet laps of her tongue at the length of his cock.

“Fucking hell,” Negan moaned out watching her bob her head over his erection returning the gesture of what he had done for her. Curling his fingers around the counter tighter, Negan could sense that his hands were shaking. There was a want to help guide her head over his length, but he was already enjoying what she was doing on her own. “That feels so fucking good.”

Her right hand was caressing the base of his erection, matching tempo with the movements her mouth made. Her other hand was over his waist, squeezing firmly at it. His heart was hammering in his chest, his body on fire with the sensations she was drawing up inside of him. Giving herself a moment to breathe, she pulled her head back and stroked her hand firmly over his throbbing length. Focusing on the sensitive tip had Negan swallowing down hard, humming out as she easily picked up on the sensitive areas.

Moving in closer to him, she dragged her tongue out across the area at the underside of his cock where the shaft and the tip met. The sound he released was so rewarding that she continued to focus on that area noticing that it had Negan tremoring. Starting to lap her tongue at the length of him caused his hips to bounce forward.

“Please,” Negan begged drawing forth a smirk from her when she took him back into the warmth of her mouth. Doing as he pleased, she worked to continue to pleasure him. With her left hand she palmed in over his lower abdomen beneath the material of his shirt while her right continued to pump over his cock in tempo with the movements her mouth made over him. Feeling him tensing up before her, she knew that he was close to coming. The sounds of his moans grew raspier as his hips bucked up toward her throat with her eyes coming to a tight close. The first line of his cum hit the back of her throat with him clinging tightly to her. Continuing to pleasure him, she swallowed down the rest of his release. A wet sound filled the air when she pulled her lips away from his twitching cock. “Fucking hell.”

Swallowing down hard, Negan reached for her and picked her up in his arms, quick to spin her. Lifting her up, he set her down on the counter and pulled her right to the edge of it. Licking his fingertips, he dropped his hand between her thighs caressing at her already sensitive flesh. Locking his eyes, Negan hovered his mouth in over hers with the warmth of her breath causing him to shudder.

“You are fucking incredible,” Negan slurred, his thumb on his free hand dragging out across her full, wet bottom lip. A loud sound caused the both of them to jump until she realized it was the sound of her phone going off. Scrambling to grab it had Negan reaching down to push himself back into his pants. Bringing her phone up, she felt her heart skip a beat seeing who it was an alert from. “What? What is it?”

“It’s Maggie,” she lowered the phone having Negan reaching for her phone so he could look at the text she sent.

“We need to talk,” Negan read it off and waved the phone about, his brow line creasing while she hastily fixed her clothing. By her body language, Negan could tell that she was starting to get ill at ease with what they had done. “Hey, hey. Calm down.”

“Negan, stop,” she demanded with him attempting to touch her. Holding her hands up she made sure to keep the distance between them. Her breathing was loud and her body was still incredibly hot. “What we’ve done? What we keep doing? I’m a horrible person.”

“No. No, you’re not,” Negan stressed to her, working his pants back together with a loud sigh. “You have loved me for a very long time and…”

“I’m making you cheat on someone. Someone I used to call my best friend,” she was overwhelmed with the idea hearing Negan’s breathing becoming uneven. “I never believed in this kind of shit. In fact,” she paused to think about how angry she got with Maggie for cheating on Negan. “I have torn into people for doing this kind of thing. I’m no better than them.”

“Hey,” Negan called out with her heading toward the door and he wrapped his fingers around her wrist to pull her back to him. Grasping her jaw between his thumb and index finger, he urged her to look at him. “Where are you going?”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, reaching up to get Negan to lower his hand away from her face. “I can’t…I can’t do this Negan. I’ve got to go home. I’ve barely slept the last few days and I just need time alone.”

“Hey, please…” Negan pled with her, his hazel eyes visibly disappointed when she made her way to the door. “Everything I’ve said to you, I mean it.”

“I think you believe it now, but I need you to work out your shit first Negan,” she informed him, shaking her head and letting out a long sigh. “What we did today was wrong and you know that just as much as I do.”

----

Tags: @slutlanna976​ @fuckthis-and-fuckthat @jennydehavilland @pixelb4rbie @ibelongtonegan

@smallsadjellyfish @labyrinthofheartagrams @msjamesmarch @thebeautysurrounds @hotfornegan

@redmercysugar @caprithebunny @tuttifuckinfruitty @emoryhemsworth @a-girl-interupted

@akumune @stoneyggirl2 @xsarcasticwriterx @haleygreen23 @xhannahbananax03

@sanctuaryforthelost @burningredaffair @killaweiser @dead-of-niight @ayumi-wolf

@promiscuousbarnes @lanadelnegan @peachihellcat @dilfsandmartinis

[kathlare]

a quiet farewell

Lando Norris x Amelie Dayman

Summary: Amelie is in the process of leaving her London apartment, reflecting on her time spent in the city, her experiences filming Wicked, and the complex emotions tied to her past, especially regarding Lando. As she prepares to move back to New York, she encounters Max Fewtrell, an old friend who offers support.

Wordcount: 1.8 k

Warnings: none

full masterlist // request over here!

December 12th, 2022 - London, United Kingdom

The sky outside was dull and overcast, typical of London’s December weather. A soft drizzle kissed the windows of the apartment as Amelie packed the last few of her things into cardboard boxes. The place, once filled with the bustling energy of her life in the midst of filming Wicked, now felt eerily empty. It had only been a few days since she’d wrapped her part in the musical, but the transition from being on set every day to leaving the city felt abrupt, like she was shedding an entire chapter of her life.

She wasn’t exactly sad to be leaving. London had been a stop on the way to something bigger—something new. But still, this apartment held memories of long nights spent rehearsing, of quiet dinners alone, and of course, the occasional visits from friends. And then there was Lando.

It was impossible to think of this apartment without remembering the time they had spent here together in 2021. The endless hours gaming, the spontaneous trips to get food in the middle of the night, and the strange, unspoken chemistry that had built between them, even when they both pretended it was nothing. The friendship that had slowly evolved into something more—a situation ship, as Lando had called it. But that was before it all came crashing down.

Amelie paused for a moment, leaning against the stack of boxes. She hadn’t spoken to Lando in over a year. The last time they had seen each other was at the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix a few weeks ago, and she had barely acknowledged his presence. She couldn’t even remember what had happened, but she had made her choice to keep her distance, focusing on the relationships that mattered now.

Amelie sighed and shook her head, trying to shake off the memories that seemed to hover around her like a cloud. The past year had been a whirlwind of emotions, both good and bad, and now she was moving on. There was nothing more to do here in London. It was time to return to New York, where everything felt a little more like home. As much as she had enjoyed her time here, the city had become a place of memories she didn’t need to revisit any longer.

The soft sound of footsteps echoed in the hallway, and Amelie turned her head, expecting to see one of the building’s tenants or maybe the landlord checking in. Instead, she froze. Standing at the end of the hallway, looking up at her with a slight frown, was Max Fewtrell.

Max leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, his face soft with curiosity and concern. His trademark casualness was present, but there was a hint of surprise in his eyes.

—You’re moving out?— he asked, raising an eyebrow. His voice, though warm, carried a touch of disbelief, as if he hadn’t expected to see her leaving so soon.

Amelie hesitated, the box in her hands suddenly feeling heavier. She hadn’t seen Max in a while. Their friendship, though not as close as it had once been, still lingered in the odd, quiet way that time and distance did. But seeing him now, standing in the hallway of the building they’d both shared, she felt a twinge of familiarity.

—Yeah,— she replied, trying to keep her tone light. —I’m heading back to New York. Finally done with the filming, and there’s not much for me here anymore. Just... need to get out of this place, I guess.—

Max nodded slowly, stepping forward, his gaze flickering over the boxes stacked by the door.

—If you need a hand...— he started, his voice casual, but with the underlying sincerity that Max always had when he offered help.

Amelie gave a soft chuckle, looking up at him.

—You don’t have to do that, Max. It’s just a couple of boxes.—

Max smirked, shrugging nonchalantly.

—Yeah, well, I’m sure you’ve got everything under control, but it’s not like I’ve got anything else to do today.— He paused for a moment, as if weighing his words. —Besides, I haven’t seen you in forever. Thought I’d at least offer. You know, in case you’re planning to tackle this mountain of stuff alone.—

There was a hint of awkwardness in his smile, but it was genuine. They hadn’t been as close after everything had unfolded, but there was still a comfort in his presence. She nodded, setting down the box with a sigh.

—Alright, alright. I’ll take the help.—

Max’s face softened as he moved to grab one of the larger boxes. They made their way down the stairs, the quiet buzz of the building’s usual hum filling the space between them.

After a few moments, Amelie couldn’t help but break the silence.

—How’s everything going with you? I mean... I know it’s been a while, but you look... good. Busy?— She glanced over at him, half-grinning. Max had always been someone she could talk to, even when everything else felt complicated.

Max looked over at her, raising an eyebrow.

—Yeah, you know, same old. Busy as always, I guess. Not much new on my end. Been mostly trying to dodge the craziness around the F1 scene. You, though? Looks like you’ve been living your best life.—

Amelie snorted softly, running a hand through her hair.

—Yeah, I guess. Filming “Wicked” was... well, it was a lot. But it’s over now. And with all that, I kinda lost touch with everything else. Which... maybe wasn’t the best idea.—

She could feel the words hanging between them, the unspoken tension, the reminder of what had happened back in 2021, between her and Lando. The last time she and Max had truly spoken, everything had been different—before she’d wrapped herself in the whirlwind of her film career and before things had soured with Lando.

Max tilted his head, eyes softening as he glanced over at her.

—You know... I’ve always said this, but... sometimes you need to get lost in the chaos to figure stuff out. Even if it’s just for a while.—

Amelie nodded slowly, grateful for the kindness in his voice.

—Yeah, I guess that’s what I did. Got lost. It was easier that way, you know?— She paused, her voice trailing off. —I needed to figure things out on my own, without distractions, without... well, without things that reminded me of everything I was trying to leave behind.—

Max didn’t push her, but he nodded, as if he understood exactly what she meant. Their friendship, even though it wasn’t as strong as it once had been, still carried that unspoken connection. They didn’t need to dive into every detail to understand where the other was coming from.

—Yeah, I get it. Sometimes stepping away is the only way to make sense of things, even if it takes a while to come back to it.— Max’s voice was steady, like he was trying to ease her through whatever mental hurdles she was running into.

They reached the lobby, and Amelie set the box down near the door to the outside. Max followed her, setting down his own box with a grunt.

—So, New York, huh?— Max asked, casually resting his hands on his hips. —Back to the big city after all this time. Must be a strange feeling, leaving London behind. You were here for a while.—

Amelie let out a quiet sigh, rubbing her hand over her forehead. —It is. But... it’s time. Things here were never the same after... everything that happened. And besides, New York is where it all started for me. It’s home. I can’t stay here forever.—

There was a slight pause between them. Amelie looked up, seeing Max's expression soften, though his gaze was distant, like he wasn’t just talking about New York anymore. She knew what he was thinking, or at least, she thought she did.

Max shifted his weight, eyes narrowing slightly as if weighing something in his mind. He tilted his head, his expression thoughtful.

—You went to Abu Dhabi, didn’t you?— he said casually, the question hanging in the air. It was an observation, not a question for confirmation, but Amelie knew exactly what he meant. It wasn’t just about the Grand Prix; it was about everything that had happened before.

Amelie froze for a moment, the weight of his words sinking in. She didn’t answer immediately, instead staring at the ground for a brief second before meeting his eyes. She could feel the familiar tension rising in her chest, the same knot that had formed every time she’d crossed paths with Lando or had to confront something she had buried away.

—So, he told you, huh?— she said, her voice quieter than usual. She let the question linger in the air as she met Max's gaze with a mixture of resignation and something else, something more vulnerable, maybe. It wasn’t just about her going to Abu Dhabi. It was about what had transpired since then, about the unspoken things that had been left in the air after that weekend.

Max didn’t flinch, and he didn’t look away. He gave her a slow nod, his eyes soft but still carrying that knowing look that had become a part of him.

—Yeah... he told me. I didn’t know you were back in the mix after all this time. Honestly, I thought you’d cut ties with the whole F1 circus for good.— He shrugged, his tone not judgmental, but still full of curiosity.

Amelie swallowed, leaning against the doorframe for support, her fingers still pressed lightly against the cardboard of the box she had been holding.

—Well, I guess I had a few things I needed to work out on my own, you know? Lando’s... Lando. And I don’t have to explain myself to him, or anyone else, really.— Her voice was steady now, though there was a sharpness to it she hadn’t intended. The mention of Lando always made her emotions twist into knots. It was hard not to think of him when everything they had shared felt so recent, even though it had been a year since everything ended. She didn’t want to admit how much it still affected her, how much she still carried from that time.

Max could sense the tension in her voice, the way her body stiffened as soon as Lando’s name slipped into the conversation. He knew better than to push her further, especially when it was clear that Amelie wasn’t ready to dive into the past.

He shifted his weight, looking down at the boxes stacked outside her apartment. The weight of the moment hung in the air, but Max wasn’t one to let things drag on in uncomfortable silence for too long.

—Fair enough. I get it. You’ve got your reasons. But just so you know, he wasn’t exactly... thrilled to see you ignoring him at the Grand Prix.— Max’s voice had an edge to it now, just a hint of teasing.

Amelie’s eyes snapped to him, and she could tell that Max was well aware of how touchy the topic was. His tone wasn’t judgmental, more like an offhand remark that hinted at the unspoken understanding between them—an understanding that had survived even after all the weirdness and distance.

—Right, well... I’m sure he’s had plenty of things to occupy his time since then.— Amelie’s voice was almost too calm, the words slipping out before she could stop herself. She couldn’t help it. She had spent so long trying to move on, but there was always a part of her that felt tied to Lando, even after everything.

Max met her gaze with a knowing look, his eyebrows furrowing slightly.

—Yeah, well, you know how it goes. Lando’s got his distractions. But I think he’s still got a bit of a soft spot for you, you know? Doesn’t help that he’s been with a string of girls who... kinda remind him of you.— He didn’t say it to be cruel. In fact, there was something almost sympathetic in the way he said it, like he understood the mess that had been their situation.

Amelie’s stomach twisted at his words. It was always like this with Lando—his way of moving on without truly letting go. The girls he dated were nothing more than placeholders, distractions from the real thing.

—Jesus, Max, I don’t need to hear that right now, okay?— Her voice cracked just slightly as she tried to keep her emotions in check. The last thing she wanted was for her complicated feelings to spill out in front of him.

—Alright, I’ll shut up about him. I’m just here to help you with your boxes. No need to dive into that drama.—

Amelie appreciated that, more than Max could probably understand. They hadn’t talked about Lando much since their falling out, and it was clear to her that Max was trying to navigate the delicate space between them. He wasn’t intruding, but he was still offering her the connection and understanding that had once been a pillar of their friendship.

They finished unloading the boxes into the bus, the last of Amelie’s things being packed up and ready for the move. There was still a bit of awkwardness hanging between them, but it was different now. The tension from before had softened, and they were back to that easy, familiar rhythm that had always existed between them—quiet conversations, small gestures of support, and a sense of understanding that needed no explanation.

As they finished, Amelie turned to face him, taking a deep breath before speaking. Her voice was quiet but urgent.

—Max... can you... please not tell Lando about today? About me leaving? I just... I don’t want him to know. Not right now.—

Max looked at her for a long moment, his expression serious. He was quiet for a second, his gaze flickering to the ground before meeting her eyes again.

—I won’t say anything. You have my word, Amelie.—

Relief washed over her, though she tried not to show too much of it. She nodded once, the weight on her chest lifting just a little.

—Thanks. I... I just can’t deal with him right now, you know? It’s... complicated. It’s always been complicated. And I just need a clean break, without anyone telling him what’s going on. Please.—

Max gave a simple nod, his lips curling into a soft smile.

—I get it. You don’t need to explain. You’ve got enough on your plate.—

Amelie smiled, her eyes softening as she finally relaxed, feeling the last of her defenses slip away. For a brief moment, it felt like things were back to a place where they could just be friends again—no pressure, no hidden meanings.

She glanced over at the bus, the large vehicle waiting to take her back to New York. It was a new chapter, a fresh start.

As she picked up the last of her things, Max helped her with the final box, and they exchanged a few more quiet words. It was strange, this feeling of moving on, of letting go. But in the end, it was for the best.

When she was finally ready to leave, Max turned to her, giving her one last casual salute.

—Take care, Amelie. You’ll do great out there. Don’t be a stranger.—

Amelie nodded, her voice quieter now.

—I won’t. Thanks, Max. And... I’ll see you around, alright?—

With that, she climbed into the bus and closed the door behind her, the last of her ties to London slipping away with a soft hum of the engine. She sat back in her seat, closing her eyes for a moment as the city began to fade in the distance.

For the first time in a long time, Amelie felt like she was finally free.

[freebooter4ever]

holy shit for the first time in ten years i forgot nicks birthday

[dear-ao3]

so. as you may know it’s christmas eve. as you probably don’t know i am eastern european. and probably the only real tradition anyone holds onto is christmas eve. normally my great aunt does all the food and very begrudgingly sometimes lets everyone help make like. one thing.

well.

this year. the year of our lord two thousand and twenty four. she decided she was done cooking and it was up to everyone else.

so i got a phone call from my mom a few weeks ago being like hey so. you’re making the cake. got it? good.

the cake in question is a walnut cake. i was entrusted with my great aunts recipe about seven years ago. i’ve made it twice. the first time i fucked up the frosting quantity. the second time i fucked up the eggs. both times were passable at best and notably! my great aunt did not taste either of them.

and i have to make this cake. on christmas eve. it is dessert. for everyone. my extended family will all be eating the cake. the walnut cake. on christmas eve. even my great aunt.

so yesterday, december 23 if you are counting, i went on the annual Last Minute Christmas Food Shopping Trip with my father, watched him climb into the case to get his half and half like he does every year, and stressed about my cake as i made sure i had all of the ingredients.

then. we went to my great aunts house. where i was met with Trial Number 1: The Cognac

this cake has cognac in the frosting. not a big deal really. except for the fact that my mom hates that there is cognac in the frosting. (my mom is hell bent on making christmas eve dinner vaguely healthier. no one else agrees.) and i was to be making the cake in my moms house.

also important to note: we (as in my parents) do not own cognac. mostly because none of us drink.

so my great aunt is like oh i have to give you the cognac. cause she knows. i am baking the cake. the walnut cake. (my dad told her. he is a traitor). and i say okay. sure. this won’t be a problem at all.

so she gives me. a shot of cognac. and when i say a shot. i mean an Entirely Full Shot Glass of Three Hundred Dollar Cognac. in a jar. for the cake. the walnut cake. that i have to make.

upon bringing the cognac home my mom says no we’re not putting that in. the cognac sits on the counter in its jar. no one touches it.

then i was met with Trial Number 2: The Frosting.

this recipe requires a pound of chopped walnuts. first. i couldn’t even find the walnuts. my sister and i searched high and low and in every cabinet we could find but no nuts. i called my mom. and said mom where are the walnuts? and she said. “they’re in the nut bag behind the basement door.”

oh of course. how could i have missed the nut bag? a holiday bag full of bags of nuts that was half hidden by wrapping paper and also behind a door?

in any case. could i have used a food processor? absolutely. did i? no. half because i forgot and half because i didn’t want to accidentally grind the walnuts into a paste. so i enlisted the help of my younger sister to chop the walnuts By Hand while i embarked on the real devil: the frosting.

which remember. is supposed to have cognac.

so i cream my butter. i add my sugar. i’m careful not to over sugar. i taste it a million times. i add my coffee and my vanilla extract (instead of cognac. which is still sitting on the counter) and it was all going so well until. the butter rebelled.

now remember. one time when i made this. seven years ago. i made too little frosting. so i made more this time. and i thought i had all my conversions right but evidently i did not because suddenly there was too much liquid in my frosting and it split.

the frosting for the walnut cake that everyone was going to eat. on christmas eve. the very next day.

i felt like a contestant on great british bake-off getting smited by the tent.

so i did the logical thing and shoved the whole mess into the fridge hoping that it would sort itself out overnight.

then it was time to face Trial Number Three: The Cake Itself.

as i have said this cake is a walnut cake. the christmas eve walnut cake that has been at christmas eve longer than i have been alive. and it requires no less than ten egg whites. which i whipped and i added to my walnuts and shoved the whole thing into the oven in my two baking dishes.

only to discover no less than 40 minutes later that the batter in the pans was Not Even (despite my best efforts). so i cooked one longer than the other and hoped that i hadn’t monumentally fucked up the walnut cake. like i had the frosting. which was in the fridge. and i was ignoring.

which leads to Trial Number Four: The Egg Yolk Cake

see i had ten egg yolks. i didn’t know what to do with them. my mom said flush them. my dad said make a custard. i proposed making egg nog. my mom said she didn’t want it in the house cause it was too fattening (a blatantly incorrect statement. please, if you are reading this, go drink a glass of eggnog. or some other fun festive drink. food is for the soul.) so i produced a recipe for an egg yolk pound cake. i made it. i still don’t know if it came out good cause i haven’t tasted it. i hope it did. but that was not the point. the point is the walnut cake. the christmas eve walnut cake.

and the following morning i was met with Trial Number Five: The Frosting Part 2

first i threw my failed frosting back in the mixer and it immediately secreted a brackish combination of vanilla extract and coffee so i did the only thing i could. facetimed my dad and said “father there are problems abound.” and he gave me the fatherly advice of “make it again.”

and so i did.

with more correct measurements. still scared it would split at any second.

though it didn’t.

and i didn’t add the cognac.

maybe no one will be able to tell???

my mom said that if anyone asks the first batch of frosting failed and i had to toss it. this is technically true.

but i had frosting. i had two uneven cakes. and it was time for Trial Number Six: Decorating

decorating cakes is easily in my top ten least favorite activities. decorating the christmas eve walnut cake is easily in my top three least favorite activities. because i am terrible at decorating cakes. and also because it has a filling.

the filling is jam. and i once again made the wrong choice because i put the jam on first before the frosting. which to be fair is what the directions say. but as everyone knows, the directions in recipes you get from your eastern european great aunt are not the real directions. so now i had to smear butter cream. on top of jam. for the filling of the walnut cake. for christmas eve. that we would be eating in a few hours.

and we didn’t have a cake plate. we had a large dish.

i had to use my fingers. i had to use three spatulas. i got jam everywhere. but i did it. and as soon as i set the top cake on top of the filling i realized my monumental mistake: i was supposed to trim down the cakes.

so now they were uneven. and lopsided. and there was nothing i, a mere mortal tasked with the impossible task of making christmas eve walnut cake, could do about it.

so i continued to spread my frosting. which i had enough of. and tried and failed to not get jam everywhere.

in the end it was almost presentable. not great. slightly lopsided. and definitely not as nice as any of my great aunts cakes.

which left me with Trial Number 7: Chilling It

our fridge was being taken up by other important christmas eve things (though not as important as my cake. the walnut cake) so i had to put it in the car. which was fine because there is snow on the ground.

i covered my cake. the walnut cake. in tin foil and hoped i wouldn’t accidentally squish it. and then i went outside. i tried to steal my moms shoes to walk outside. she was not impressed.

“you know, saph,” she said. “some of the time you’re pretty great. the other half of the time you’re really weird.”

i could not agree more.

i put my cake on the trunk. prayed to the cake gods and went inside.

on the one hand if the cake is good, i will be stuck making walnut cake for christmas eve for the rest of my life. on the other hand, if it sucks i will never have to make another one.

Trial Number Eight: The Tasting still waits.

[izadi234]

Forget me not

-Warning: Contain yandere themes, neglected! gn!reader, mention of low self-esteem, the writer's first language isn't English.

Yan! Batfamily x gn! reader

Chapters

Chapter 1

Chapter 2 (You're here)

Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5

Chapter 2

The moment you retreated to your room Alfred's gaze hardened as he looked at the kitchen door through which you had left.

With a sigh he returned to making breakfast, however, something couldn't stop going around in his head.

Why?

Why do you have to leave?

Why do you have to leave ME?

He doesn't blame you. Your "family" has done nothing but ignore you and push you aside on more than one occasion since you arrived at Wayne Manor. And if it weren't for him, Bruce wouldn't have remembered to pay for your needs and education.

No. He could never blame you for your decision, but he can blame Bruce and your brothers. He had never felt such anger for them, not even when Martha and Thomas died at the hands of that cruel man. But that never had a solution, but this did. His family has a solution and he was going to fix it for you and for you. To always have his ray of sunshine at his side.

He wasn't going to lose you without having fought a war.

But for now, he had to stay calm. He sighed once more and finally relaxed as he served breakfast on the plates. He has to talk to Duje after you told him about your decision.

He had to think with a cool head. As he had told Bruce many years ago: "Fear doesn't make you think clearly" and not only was he scared of his little ones going out into the world alone, he also had anger built up. And he was going to use those two feelings to his advantage.

It was not for nothing that he was a very feared soldier during the war.

You were in your room as usual texting with a friend when Duke knocked on your bedroom door before coming in.

"Hey (name)!" said Duke happily who sat on your bed while you sat at your desk

"Oh hey Duke!" you greeted him with a smile anyway "How was school today?"

"A little boring, but at least it's Friday now" he chuckled

"And you? How was your day?"

It's now or never.

You sighed and got up from your spot to sit next to him on your bed.

"I have something to tell you Duke…" you put a hand on his shoulder

"And what is it?" He asked worriedly seeing your seriousness "Don't tell me it's something bad"

"No, it's nothing bad. At least I don't consider it bad" you started to say "But, Duke, I've decided to move out of the mansion"

"…What?…" he said in a quiet tone of voice surprised by your words

No, it can't be…

"I know it's sudden, but I can't stand this place" you sighed "I want- No, I need to start over without being in the shadow of others"

You turned to look at him and caressed his cheek.

"But this doesn't mean we won't see each other again. We'll be able to talk and keep in touch" you offered him a smile

Without saying anything, Duke hugged you and nestled his head in the crook of your neck. You put a hand on his neck and caressed him.

"Just… Don't forget about me…" he said after a few minutes of silence.

He pulled away from you and wiped away some tears that threatened to fall from his eyes.

"I could never do that, brother," you wiped one of his eyes with your thumb.

After that emotional conversation, you and Duke spent the afternoon in your room talking and watching movies on your laptop. However, Duke's mind was still on that conversation.

There was no chance that you would leave him. He had to find a way to prevent you from leaving his side.

The week you moved went by so fast that when you realized it, you were already taking the last box with your belongings out of the mansion.

You looked back at that mansion one last time and felt like that little kid again who arrived with fear and excitement to what he would call home for years. But soon your face darkened as you remembered the suffering you had experienced there. Without thinking twice, you turned around and got on your motorcycle, but not before securing your last box. You started the bike and left Wayne Manor.

You hadn't said goodbye to Alfred nor Duke but you left a letter on both of their beds wishing each of them the best, thanking them for everything and giving them the phone number of your second cell phone in case they needed something or just wanted to check on you. However, you didn't leave anything else, not even an address. You wanted to completely erase the Waynes from your life, you wanted to erase the fact that you were a Wayne too. You wanted to forget them so much that you turned off the cameras in the mansion for a period of time so you could take out your things in peace, so that no one would see the license plates of your motorcycle that you had been keeping at a friend's house and whose motorcycle was registered.

If nothing else, you had developed the same paranoia as Bruce and decided to take every measure to avoid being located. You even thought about going to live in Metropolis or Star City but the rent and sale of apartments there were much more expensive than in Gotham. Maybe when you earn more money once you finish college.

But for now focus on your present.

Before it is taken away from you.

When you got to your apartment you let out a sigh that you didn't know you were holding. You looked around, there were some pieces of furniture that came with the apartment like a leather armchair that was a little worn but looked pretty new, a wooden bookcase, several coffee tables, some pots and kitchen stuff. The only thing you had to buy was your bed but your best friend did you the favor of giving you a headboard for your bed as a gift of independence and you only bought a mattress. It wasn't as comfortable as the one you had in the mansion but at least you had things you could consider yours. NOT thanks to Wayne, but thanks to your efforts.

You put the box on the kitchen counter and before going to your room you saw several boxes.

Damn... You hadn't thought about how lazy you were going to be when you had to unpack.

That same day you left, Alfred had returned from going grocery shopping. At that time of the morning you and he used to spend the morning together, while you were in your online classes, he did the housework along with the food. Between the breaks you had between classes you used to go see what he was doing in the kitchen and you were his personal taster.

Now that you were on vacation, you spent more time with him because Bruce, Tim and sometimes Damian went to Wayne Enterprises, Dick and Jason weren't usually at the mansion and Duke, Cass and Stephanie were training in the Batcave or with their friends. For that same reason Alfred was alarmed when he called your name and you didn't answer.

He quickly went up to your room only to find it completely empty. His heart raced and he started to sweat lightly.

You couldn't have left so quickly, right?

He went down again and checked all the rooms in the big mansion and found nothing. Only his own room was missing. As he entered he could see an envelope of your favorite color on his pillow. He approached and read it.

In the letter you apologized for not saying goodbye to him in person but if you did you were more than sure that you wouldn't be able to leave. You also left him a private cell phone number where he could call you and you wished him all the best.

It had been a long time since Alfred felt the need to cry but without realizing it he had already shed a few tears. He couldn't believe that his little one was already gone.

After having shed a few tears, he quickly wiped his eyes and composed himself. No, he couldn't cry because you were going to return. He was sure of that.

However, he would let you enjoy your independence a little before implementing his plan for you to return home to your family. With him.

But first he'll have to talk with Duke.

Helloooo! I hope you liked the second chapter! If you did leave a heart and i'll see you in the next one. I kind of think this chapter is kind of bland but the story is just begining. This are the first impressions of you leaving the Manor but soon enough the rest of the family will appear.

Thanks you for reading!

-Izadi <3

TAG LIST

@eyeless-kun

[spencerrreiddd]

Three, Two, One. - Chapter 1

Summary: You and Spencer have worked in the BAU together for years, since the beginning but now, he's your boss and something quite big is happening in your life & soon to be Spencer's life after needing each others help to unwind.

Pairing: UnitChief!Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader

WC: 3.3k

Warnings: Pregnancy, Angst, Cheating??

A/N: LOW & BEHOLD- here lays my first beauty. - my apologies is this is complete shit, I have not written in a while & I may have to get my special touch back. - anyways, i hope you guys like it ! 🔪🤍

Three, Two, One. Chaper 2.

three, two, one-

pregnant.

You were pregnant. You were pregnant with your bosses baby.

Spencer has not always been your boss, you actually started working for the BAU a month before he had even started working there.

He took over Emily's position once she moved up to FBI Director a few months back, at that congratulations party is when something sparked between you and Spencer- just, neither of you acted on it

You remember exactly how and when it happened too, it was the party after his promotion to Unit Chief. Goddamn promotion parties. You didn’t think you drank that much, until you woke up naked beside your new boss.

The temptation to pack a bag and hop on a flight across the world sounded so appetizing right now in your mind, too bad that it isn't realistic & you were going to have to face the facts and that was including, him.

There was never any “no speaking of this” - only us meeting up at my apartment, his apartment, our hotel rooms when we were on a case and needed to ‘unwind’ - the last time you and Spence had even slept together was 2-3 weeks ago anyway, of course when y'all needed to unwind after a case. Who could've guessed that one?

You were snatched from your thoughts when you heard your phone ringing from your bedroom- running for it, you were hoping that it wasn't Spencer.

‘Penelope Garcia 🖥️💖🍩’ 'thank the heavens' you silently think to yourself

“What’s up, Penny”

“Spencer is busy, he put me on duty to call you to find out if you plan to show your face at work today, ya know- since it is a work day and no show, no calls are frowned upon here" Your neck snaps to look at your alarm clock.

"Also, he wants to see you in his office once you get here"

7:32 A.M - have I seriously been staring at a positive pregnancy test for an entire hour?

“Fuck. See you soon. I'm leaving right now"

The short drive to work felt longer than it should have, probably because you took back roads to avoid having to see him again so soon. If you were already running late, what is a few extra minutes?

So many thoughts flying through your mind. How are you going to tell him? Oh hey, by the way, ya knocked me up so what’s the plan bud?!

“I'm doomed" You mutter to yourself getting out of your vehicle to go face reality, to go face the man of your now growing child. This has to be a nightmare.

Getting off of the elevator, the first person you saw was Alvez- boy, you were thankful that it wasn't Spencer, even though you'd be seeing him in just a few minutes.

"Looks like you saw a ghost"

"Yeah, Luke, something like that"

"You want to talk about it?"

"Not right now, I just want to forget about it- I need to see Pen" yeah, Y/N, like you'll actually be able to forget about it.

You make a beeline directly for Penelope's office, you have to tell someone about this before you actually lose your mind.

"Pen, I have news and it has to stay between you and I only"

"Your secret is safe with me, my love"

"I'm pregnant.. with Spencer's baby" you hesitated even saying the last part but wow, that felt good to get off of your chest, too bad it won't feel this easy with Spencer. Just thinking of having to tell him has you feeling like someone is choking you out.

"Oh."

"Oh? Pen, I am in a state of panic, a state of shock and you say 'Oh'- I don't know what to even begin to do here or how to even tell Reid that I am carrying his.. spawn"

"Spencer has a girlfriend or did, as far as I kn- okay, when did you find out” She cuts herself after seeing the look of horror on your face after hearing the beginning of her sentence, understandably so!

You were NOT the type of person to sleep with a taken man.

You were confident that you were about to face plant the ground right here and now in Penelope’s office. Did Spencer have a girlfriend or not? And were you about to go physically fight him for doing this to her, if so? You would be considering yourself jobless at that point.

“I found out this morning, literal minutes before you called me to get my ass here” you were in a pure state of panic and you had many good reasons as to why.

“How long has he had a girlfriend, Pen?” you continued- you were sure your skin was blistering with how hot it was at this point. Was it hot out of anger or the panic attack that was charging at you? Who knows anymore because you didn’t care enough in this single second to sit and determine that.

"I don't know, he just mentioned a date a few weeks ago then didn't mention anything again but I know he's still in communication with her and by the contact name in his phone, I don't think they are just friends" Penelope lets you in on all of this, nervously- like she isn't supposed to be saying anything at all.

"Thanks, Pen" You murmur to her her as you leave, you have to leave her office, the longer you are in there, the more it feels like the walls are literally closing in on you.

Walking into the hallway, you don't know which direction to go- You should probably go see Spencer and give him some bullshit excuse as to why you were late.

It was barely 8 A.M, maybe it was past 8 A.M now- your mind is going too fast to try and keep up with time. Regardless, it's too early in the morning to drop a pregnancy announcement on someone.

Finally, you muster up the courage to walk into the bullpen to go on the hunt for Spencer, as much as your mind and body are telling you to just bolt to your car and never look back.

"Tara, do you know where Spencer is?" You ask quietly, so that you don't disturb the others around you

"No, I saw him walk out of his office a few minutes ago but I haven't seen him go back in. If you find him before me, let me know because I need to go over some things with him"

"I'll go knock and see if he's back, thanks Tara"

You can visibly see his blinds are closed but majority of the time they are closed anyways, so that doesn't even matter to you. Walking up the flight of stairs to get to his office is exhausting, it feels like your legs weigh 1000 pounds each.

Standing in front of his office, you hear talking inside- You can very clearly hear a females voice inside talking to him but you honestly couldn't tell if she was over the phone or actually in his office by how muffled it is, it's safe to assume that it is a phone call.

"No going back now since you're already here" You mumble to yourself

Knock, knock, knock

"Come in" You hear a muffled Spencer behind the door

As your opening the door, you quickly hear him state to the woman on the phone 'I have to go, I'll see you tonight' - God, as if you haven't already wanted to run away all morning, it keeps getting worse.

"Pen said you wanted to see me?"

"Yes, please sit" He says, gesturing to the chair

"Are you okay, Y/N? - You were late this morning, we've worked together for many years now and you've never once ran late, it's not like you not to communicate" You can see on his face that he cares, he didn't bring you in here to give you a lecture over something small, especially since this is your first time ever running late.

"Y-yes, I just woke up late and then getting to my car, I realized I had a flat, so I had to ask my neighbor to use his pump to fill it" You lied straight through your pearly white teeth and you were confident that he knew it to, just by the look he was giving you

He stares at you for a moment, trying to read you for anything. You were thankful for the fact that sometimes you were an impossible person to read

"Please, just communicate next time- It's not a big deal you were late, we just didn't know what was going on until I had Garcia get a hold of you"

"I will, you have my word- Am I good to go now?" You ask while standing up, yes, the talk went better than expected but you still wanted out of this office as fast as possible.

"Yes, thank you for coming to talk to me. Oh, also before I forget to mention it, at some point today whenever we both have free time, I would like to have a conversation. If it's just at the end of the day that's fine. It just needs to happen"

All you can bring yourself to do is nod your head and walk out of the room, based on the ass end of the phone call you walked in on- You have a pretty good hunch what he will be saying to you, especially after what Garcia also let you in on

It makes your heart ache- knowing that he could have a girlfriend, knowing this thing that the two of you had will be coming to an end, by no means were you and Spencer in a committed relationship but you would be lying to yourself, if you said you hadn't gained feelings for him and actually wanted more than just a 'fuck buddy' outcome

"So, is he up in the office? I really need to see him" Tara asks while already walking up there and away from you before you can even give her an answer.

You know for a fact that you are not going to be able to focus on work at all today even if you try your hardest, your anxiety is skyrocketing through the roof waiting for this conversation with Spencer and still, wondering when and how you are going to spill the beans about carrying his growing child.

"Alright, what is your issue? Are you pregnant?" Alvez is like a brother to you, nothing has been off limits in the talking department but this just sent you for a whole loop with how bluntly he asked.

You were confident that if it were possible, your eyes would've popped right out of their sockets and into your lap.

"Alvez, I am not discussing this with you right now" you whisper yelled to him, you didn't mean to come off like a bitch at all but god only knows who could've heard him.

"Well, Y/N, If I am being entirely honest. Penelope lets some things slip from time to time" He states like it's the most obvious thing ever.

All you can seem to do is look at him like a dear in the headlights, you feel your skin getting hot and prickly, it feels like there are someones hands around your throat squeezing harder and harder by the second.

"I have to go, I need to go home, I need air" It all comes out in a panic, you get up from your desk and bolt out of the bullpen and down the stairs, you don't even care to take the elevator. You cannot be stuck in a tight spot right now, a tight spot like an elevator.

"Please, just communicate" - "I will, you have my word" the conversation in Spencer's office goes through your mind and you know that you have to communicate with him that you just left work for the day and you don't plan to come back today, atleast- you couldn't and thankfully, it was Friday.

to: Spencer 'The Genius' Reid

'I have to excuse myself for the day, I'm sorry that I am having to send you a text message about this rather than coming to your office- this is me communicating with you. I will return back to my work duties on Monday, unless of course, a case pops up over the weekend then I will be here'

'also, I know we need to have a conversation, I also have something I need to tell you- let me know when you would like this conversation to take place' -

After sending your texts to Spencer, you set your phone on DND because at this point, you don't want to deal with anything or anyone else today, emergency or not.

Driving home was an entire blur, I mean you made it home alive, so that's what matters, I guess.

Walking inside, you plop onto the couch and turn on your favorite comfort show.. Modern Family.

A few hours later, you wake up in the exact place you laid down at- you thought your couch was so comfy until now when your entire body is in pain.. well, maybe it was your horrible sleeping position.

5:13 P.M -

"sweet baby jesus on a motorbike" You mutter to yourself after looking at the clock

"what are you doing to me?" You ask while poking your non-existent baby bump, granted it was a great sleep so you weren't trying to complain- you had heard from JJ in the past that early pregnancy is exhausting and you will sleep.. ALOT.

**BACK AT THE BAU**

"I just practically asked her if it was true but maybe in a more blunt way, it wasn't meant to come out so.. blunt" Alvez explains to Penelope who apparently watched you sprint out of work.

"I specifically told you not to say anything to her about it, I didn't even mean to let it slip to you of all people, Luke. I don't even think that they were in a relationship which makes this so much more difficult for her, as I could imagine" Pen snaps back at Luke.

"It's not going past me, I'm not opening my mouth to anyone about it" Luke says while walking to the Elevator with Pen, finally the work day was over

"Yeah, you let it slip to someone or who knows, I accidentally do again and Spencer is going to find out which right now, that doesn't need to happen" Pen states while being wildly unaware of who just came up behind them

"What doesn't Spencer need to find out right now and why can't he find out right now?" He asks from directly behind Alvez and Garcia, looking between the two of them for a answer.

Luke and Penelope both seem to jump straight out of their skin, not expecting to be crept up on- in reality, it was not Spencer's plan to creep up on them, he just happened to be leaving at the exact time as them and they didn't hear him coming up in the middle of their 'supposed to be' private conversation that was happening out in the open.

"I- uh it's nothing, well, sir, it's nothing in regards to me, i'm fine- it's not my place to tell you, it wasn't my place to tell, Luke- it just slipped and I am blabbering and I just realized that I need to get home" Before Spencer or Luke could say anything to her or anything more to Spencer, she's in the elevator with the doors closing.

'Nice Penelope, real nice' Luke thinks to himself, feeling a bit annoyed and slightly scared

Turning to look behind him, he sees Spencer's eyes boring right into him like he's staring right into Luke's soul, just waiting and searching for answers.

"Is there anything that you know, Alvez?" Spencer finally breaks the silence, otherwise who knows how long the two of them would've stayed standing there in the awkward paralyzing silence.

"I just know Y/N had to leave early today because, well I don't know why but I just know she left- you're her boss too, she should've communicated with you, right?"

"Right, Luke and she did, I have been trying to text and call her since I received her messages and nothing is going through" Reid is quick to bite back, getting quite annoyed himself being left in the dark and now that he is adding the pieces together, he's assuming these secretive things that "he isn't allowed to know about currently" are about you.

"I don't have any other information, what I told you is all I know- but I do need to get home to Roxy" Luke matter-of-factly states even though Luke knows that Luke is lying, well- not about Roxy but about the first part.

"Mhm, alright. Have a good night, Luke" Spencer gave up on trying to get any information out of the turnips that don't bleed but he is confident when he says this is about you and he will get to the bottom of it.

Back at your apartment, you've finally relaxed after a nice hot shower and ordering from your favorite chinese food joint and yes, still watching your comfort show but this time from the comfort of your own bed.

You still haven't even taken your phone off of DND mode, in your mind all you thought was 'if it is important enough, you know where I live and if you don't, contact Penelope Garcia' and the most important part, you were at peace.

You weren't worried about this pregnancy, you had accepted your fate, you weren't worried about Spencer or his new situ-relationship, you weren't even worried about what had happened with Alvez or Garcia. Peace.

"jesus Spencer, what the fuck" You yell out after walking out of the room and coming face to face with him, to say that you were startled was to say the absolute least

"Well, you would've known I was coming if someone didn't have their phone on airplane mode" He bit back with a darkness in his eyes and maybe a bit of worrisome, you couldn't tell everything with how dark it was.

"I know that I gave people a key to my house for emergencies but our conversation or how I was protecting my peace on a Friday night is not an emergency and frankly, if anyone was that worried, you would've sent someone sooner" You were once again fed up and wanted to continue to be alone with your favorite person, Phil Dunphy.

"I was going to drop our conversation until this weekend or even Monday, when we see each other in person again but funny enough, I was walking out to leave for the day when I walked into Luke's and Penelope's conversation and it was about you and something that I shouldn't be finding out about right now- would you happen to know anything about that?" Spencer replied, getting more and more fed up by the second.

If Spencer didn't know any better, he would say that you looked like you just saw a ghost- he was dead on the money about the conversation and some secret rooting back to you- now to just get it out of you.

Calming down after seeing the state you were rushing into, he comes to you with a softer approach - "Y/N, I want to help you. We've known each other for years, since I started working for the BAU, please let me know. Let me know what is going on. I'm not going anywhere"

You felt like you were about to up-chuck your chinese food all over this poor man, you know you need to tell him.

'Y/N you will never know the outcome of this unless you open your mouth and spill those words to him, be brave, be bold' You think silently to yourself.

"Spencer, I'm pregnant - You are the last person I slept with. I am pregnant with your baby"

if this is horrible, sue me - i haven't written in forever and honestly, this is a little bit longer than i thought it would be - whoops!

FEEDBACK IS APPRECIATED

& yeah, yeah- i left this on a cliffhanger, if you beautiful humans actually like this, i had planned to make this a 2 parter story or who knows, if i make the next part longer then it could be 3 or more parts.

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

How about Aegon or Aemond corrupting jace's twin? Maybe Aegon does the corrupting and Aemond is into her?

The list of morally wrong things in this one is astronomical, but it’s House of the Dragon so it’s okay. Also, this is part 1 (let me know what should happen in the next part!). I wanted to wait until it was fully finished to post, but this is 6k already so I'm splitting it

Warnings: 18+, smut, uncle/niece incest, corruption, fingering, oral (m receiving), non-consensual touch (not by Aegon or Aemond), protective!Aegon,

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

It all began when a letter from your grandsire arrived at Dragonstone, inviting you to spend summer in King’s Landing. You hadn't seen your grandsire since his fiftieth namedays, which was about two years ago, so you were more than pleased to accept his invitation. The gardens were beautiful in the summer…and you hadn’t seen Haelena in a while. 

It was absolutely not in the hopes to see your uncles again.

‘’Are you out of your mind? You’re going straight to the dragons’ den! Have you forgotten how they treated us all these tears we lived there?’’ Jacaerys said, walking into your bedchamber like it was his own.

The news of your summer plans must have reached his ears after his lesson with the Maester. 

‘’They’re not horrible people, you just never got along with them,’’ you fired back at your twin brother as you continued packing your bags for tomorrow.  

Growing up, your brothers had a few differences with Aegon and Aemond — many stupid fights and a lot of bullying on both ends —, but you never had the same treatment. Mayhaps it was because you were spending more time with Haelena than the boys. Or mayhaps they just took their teasing too seriously. 

Jacaerys was not letting it go. ‘’They called you a bastard in your back, like they did Luke and I.’’ 

The first time you heard the word from Aegon’s mouth, it hurt you. Being a bastard was badly seen. Especially for the children of the heir of the Iron throne. His slur branded your mother as a whore. 

Having heard, Jacaerys had come forward, the two pushing and shoving until Ser Criston and Ser Harwin separated them. When informed that a fight had occured in the courtyard between Aegon and Jace, your mother was mad at Jacaerys but also flattered that he had defended her honor. 

‘’We both know the truth about our father, Jace,’’ you reminded him, refusing to be blind. 

Although you and your brothers were conceived from an infidelity, you didn’t feel shame in being your father’s child. You remembered Ser Harwin being around in King’s Landing and making your mother happy. He was a kind and honorable man. Leanor was rarely ever present. 

‘’If the court finds out about our father, I won’t be recognized as heir. They’ll never allow a bastard to sit on the Iron Throne.’’

‘’We’re Targaryens, and that’s all that matters, all you need to sit on the throne,’’ you insisted. ‘’Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to finish packing.’’

⁂

At your return from King’s Landing, you’ll be meeting suitors — which you dreaded. That meant that this summer was going to be the last summer before becoming a wife. The thought of getting married made your stomach churn. Marriage was not something that interested you — at all. Like your mother, you would much rather ride your dragon and travel than live in a Lord’s castle and start a family.

Your arrival was announced to the King, who summoned you in the throne room. 

He stood from the throne as you approached, a smile spreading across his face. ‘’Ah, there you are,’’ Viserys said warmly, stepping down to meet you. ‘’It's good to see you back in King's Landing.’’

You returned the smile. ‘’Thank you for the invitation, Your Grace,’’ you replied respectfully.  

‘’You’ve grown,’’ Viserys remarked, his gaze appraising you. ‘’And you inherited your grandmother's beauty.’’

Though you never had the chance to meet Queen Aemma, you knew it was a compliment. The King always spoke fondly of his late wife.

‘’I’ll be ten and eight soon,’’ you informed him. 

‘’Already?’’ The King raised an eyebrow and you nodded. ‘’Time flies, doesn’t it? We’ll have a tourney in your and Jacaerys’ honor. My first grand-children turning ten and eight, it deserves to be celebrated.’’

⁂

You changed out of your traveling dress, then went looking for your aunt and uncles. 

First, you spotted Aegon soaring overhead on Sunfyre, the golden dragon gleaming in the sunlight. He had gotten so large and beautiful. You’ll have to ask Aegon to ride together next time he goes. 

Next, you made your way to the training yard, where you knew Aemond often spent his time. As expected, you found him there, sparring with Ser Criston, his movements swift and precise. He was much better than your brothers at sparring, you mentally noted.

You called his name excitedly as you stepped down the stairs, which you realized was a mistake when he almost got taken down by Ser Criston. You apologized, but Aemond shook his head. 

‘’No harm done,’’ he assured you, putting away his sword and walking over to you. 

The last time you were in this training yard, you kicked Aemond’s ass. You were only kids, but it was still one of your greatest victories. Sword-fighting was in your blood. With a little bit of training, you would be as great as the boys in this yard.

‘’Can you still hold a sword, Princess?’’ 

⁂

You and Aemond cleaned up just in time for dinner, where you greeted the Queen and Helaena. They had the same hairstyle, which reminded of you and your mother, Rhaenyra. Children look up to their parents.

After dinner, you, Helaena, Aemond and Aegon retired to the latter’s chamber and spent the evening talking, laughing and eating small cakes and other sweet treats that you had requested from the kitchens.  

‘’These pastries are divine,’’ you said, loving the bitter raspberry mixed with the sweetness of the tart. ‘’We don’t have anything like this on Dragonstone.’’ You took another bite, humming at the taste.

Just as you finished your third tart, Aegon stood and excused himself. ‘’It's been wonderful having you here, dear niece, but duty calls.’’

You glanced out the window, noticing the silver glow of the moon and the twinkling stars against the dark sky. ‘’At late hour?’’ 

Aegon paused for a moment, a confident smirk spreading across his face. ‘’Some duties can only be fulfilled at night,’’ he declared cryptically, his gaze flickering mischievously towards Aemond, who could only shake his head in response.

‘’I wouldn't exactly call it duty,’’ Aemond remarked, trailing off as Aegon interjected with a mischievous grin.

‘’A treat, then,’’ the older prince continued, redirecting his attention to you with a knowing look. ‘’You enjoy pastries. I, however, have a preference for women.’’

Confusion clouded your expression. ‘’What do you mean?’’

‘’Sex,’’ Aegon declared boldly, his eyes gleaming with mischief. 

Your gaze fell to your feet, color rising in your cheeks. ‘’Oh.’’ 

Aegon's lips twitched with amusement at your reaction. ‘’Ever had sex, dear niece?’’ 

‘’Aegon,’’ Aemond interjected, his voice a warning.

You shook your head. 

It was a good thing that Helaena had fallen asleep or she would have covered her ears. Sex always made her uncomfortable. 

‘’Not even with yourself?’’ Aegon continued. 

Confusion struck your face. ‘’Eh, no.’’

‘’You’re missing out.’’ 

⁂

Every night, you watched from your window as Aegon sneaked out through the secret passageway of the Red Keep. You had discovered these passageways when you were playing hide and seek as kids. Aemond always complained that hiding there was cheating, but you and Aegon did it anyway.

You couldn't help but wonder what was so great about sex that made him go out every night.  

One night, you decided to follow him. The curiosity was too much to resist. 

You snuck early through the secret passageways and waited for any sign of Aegon's approach. The damp, narrow corridors brought back memories of your childhood games. 

Finally, you heard his familiar footsteps echoing down the passage. As he rounded the corner, you stepped out of the shadows. 

‘’What is my favorite niece doing here?’’ Aegon asked, raising an eyebrow. He had a dark cloak over his shoulders, covering any signs that could give his identity away in the city. 

You took a deep breath, your heart pounding in your chest. ‘’I want to come to the pleasure house with you.’’ 

Aegon stared at you for a moment, then laughed. 

‘’I'm serious, Aegon. I…I want to know about sex.’’ You tried to make your voice confident, knowing Aegon would send you to your chamber if he sensed a sliver of uncertainness. 

Taking your hand in his, Aegon led you through the maze of streets and alleys. It was bustling with people. Merchants and artisanal liquor sellers were pushing their beverages at you, almost forcing you to have a taste. Some people were drunk and stumbling about, while some were playing instruments with surprising skill, their melodies blending with the occasional fights breaking out nearby. You could hear obscene sounds from darkened alleys, adding to the chaotic symphony of the night. 

It was your first time coming to the city, and the overwhelming sights and sounds made you clung to Aegon, not wishing to get lost. 

He came to a stop when you reached a dark wooden door. Aegon pushed it open and pulled you inside. 

The stuffy air hit you immediately, making you wrinkle your nose. Aegon took off his hood, but didn’t let go of you. You were under his responsibility tonight. Around you, people lounged around in various states of undress, some lost in laughter, others in more intimate activities that brought a pink tint to your cheeks. 

Aegon made a stop to the bar, ordering two cups of wine. One for him, and one for you. 

‘’Drink,’’ he said. ‘’It’s nothing like what we have at the Keep, but it'll help you relax.’’ 

You took the glass and sipped tentatively, the sour taste of the wine making you grimace. He was right about this wine being disgusting. You had to force it down your throat. 

‘’What do you do when you come here?’’ you asked, looking around with a mix of curiosity and unease.

Aegon leaned against the bar as he downed the rest of his drink. ‘’I get my cock sucked. Or I fuck some whore. Depends how I’m feeling that night.’’ 

His bluntness caught you off guard, and you felt your cheeks flush. ‘’What of me? How do I…’’ You bit your lip, the words shy on your tongue. ‘’I don’t have a cock.’’ 

‘’You don’t need a cock for pleasure.’’ Aegon set his empty cup on the bar. ‘’Come with me.’’ 

You followed him through the mass of people, avoiding touching or being touched by anyone. Some of these people were very handsy and pushy, asking for things you didn’t quite understand. 

One the way, a woman approached Aegon, her dress barely clinging to her body. She smiled seductively at him, her eyes flicking to you briefly before returning to him. ‘’Care for some company tonight, my prince?’’ she purred, hoping to make some good money tonight. 

Aegon glanced at you, as if gauging your reaction, then back at the woman. ‘’Not tonight.’’

The whore looked at you behind Aegon, giving you a full stare down, and glared. Did she take you for another whore? In your silk dress and jewelry around your neck?

You followed your uncle to a room, gasping in shock when you saw a woman being penetrated by two men. One was standing at her head, her mouth wrapped around him. Spit was dribbling from her mouth, but she didn’t seem to care. And the other was thrusting into her from behind, loud moans leaving their mouths. To your right, a woman with saggy breasts was bouncing on a bearded man’s cock. She craned her head back to kiss her partner, sweat covering both their bodies. 

It was not at all what you had expected. No one seemed shy or embarrassed of exposing themself in front of so many people. In fact, they didn’t seem to care at all. They were just there to take what they needed. 

‘’Don’t listen to what your Septa told you. Sex is not just for baby-making, sex is for pleasure. For the woman as it is for the man,’’ Aegon purred into your ear as you watched the people around you. ‘’Men find pleasure from their cock.’’ He pointed to a man getting his male part sucked, his head thrown back and moaning. ‘’And women from their cunny.’’ He pointed to two women in a corner, one with her hand between her partner’s legs. She seemed to be feeling great pleasure, you noticed.  ‘’Although most people here indulge in penetrative sex, penetration is not necessary for pleasure. You can find that same pleasure — at least similar to — by yourself.’’

‘’I want to try,’’ you stated, wanting to feel the same pleasure as her. 

Aegon shook his head. ‘’We’re only here to watch. I’m not letting any of these men get their hands on you.’’

You frowned. ‘’How am I supposed to learn?’’ 

Aegon motioned for one of the unoccupied whores to come up to him. Her hair was brown and very long. He gave her body a few caresses, then pointed at you as he explained something to her. She nodded in understanding and took your hand, leading you to a corner where a ‘bed’ was not being used.

‘’Larissa is gonna teach you the ways to pleasure,’’ Aegon explained. 

⁂

On your return from the brothel, you said a giggly ‘good night’ to Aegon and disappeared inside your chamber, excited to undress and try what Larissa had taught you. You had studied her movements, which had triggered tingly feelings between your legs. 

You unlaced your dress and boots, then flopped down on your bed. You opened your legs, exposing your pussy, and took a short moment to look down at it. It was different from Larissa’s. Your hair density was different and you didn’t have the floppy skin she called ‘petals’, but you didn’t think too much of it. All bodies were different, she said. 

The cool air of the room made the throbbing between your legs worse. Was this how it was supposed to feel? 

Tentatively, you lowered one hand between your legs, right against your throbbing core, and breathlessly gasped when you made contact with your sensitive skin. You threw your head back against the wall and closed your eyes at the new found sensation. 

Wetness stuck to your fingers and you pressed harder against your core, causing your eyelashes to flutter. ‘’Ahh.’’ 

Your fingers traced the seam of your slit, spreading the wetness around. Each touch sent waves of sensation through you, making you want more. Taking it to the next level, you swiped between your folds, causing you to moan as soon as you met your sensitive flesh. 

You continued doing so, humming in delight and feeling yourself relax more into the sensations your fingers were bringing. Why had no one told you about this kind of pleasure before? It was much better than eating raspberry tarts. 

Another moan slipped past your lips, the tingly feeling between your legs intensifying. You pushed your hips down onto your hand and sighed softly, arching your back from the bed. But it wasn't enough. 

Something inside you was tingling. 

Finding no better ways to relieve these tingles, you slid your middle finger inside of yourself. Immediately, your walls closed around your finger, warm and wet. It felt strange — and sinful. You began moving it in and out, your mouth opening to form an ‘O’ shape. 

‘’Oh Gods…’’ 

You began pumping your finger in and out a bit faster, thinking it was what you needed, but it did not make the tingles go away. It did feel good, but after a moment, your hand was getting tired and the tingles were growing more intense. 

‘’What am I doing wrong?’’ you asked aloud, feeling frustrated. 

⁂

On the morrow, after your afternoon tea with Helaena, you knocked on Aegon’s door. He rarely left his chambers during the day — other than for dinner or to ride Sunfire —, so you knew he would be there. 

Taking a deep breath, you knocked on the heavy wooden door. The sound echoed in the quiet hallway. Moments later, the door creaked open, revealing Aegon in his usual princely attire. His silver hair was tousled, and his eyes had a tired look. 

‘’I need your help,’’ you said, not wasting time with formal greetings. ‘’Something seems wrong with my body, I’m afraid…’’ 

Aegon raised an eyebrow, leaning against the doorframe. ‘’What do you mean?’’

You hesitated, second thinking if you should be going to him about your intimate problems. After all, Aegon had boy parts, how could he help you? ‘’What Larissa taught me last night, it is not working. I tried, but I cannot…make the tingles go away. My finger is not enough.’’ 

Aegon's expression shifted from curious to alarmed as he glanced on both sides of the halfway, making sure no one had heard you. If anyone knew of your little escapade into the city, Aegon would be in a lot of trouble. 

Then, he stepped aside, gesturing for you to enter quickly. The room was somber despite the large window dorning over the city, and the bed was unmade. You couldn’t say you were surprised by the latter. 

Aegon shut the door behind you, pulling you out of your observation, and turned to face you. ‘’You should be more careful of the matters you speak about outside closed doors. You would be surprised by the number of ill intentioned ears that are waiting for bad whispers in this castle.’’

You nodded, having not thought of that. On Dragonstone, there weren't as many maids or servants.  They mostly assisted your mother and the younger children, or busied themselves with cleaning tasks in the lower floors of the castle. 

‘’Take a seat,’’ Aegon invited, sitting down in a large velvet chair at the center of the room and gesturing towards a loveseat right across for you. ‘’And tell exactly what you mean by ‘not enough’.’’ 

You pursed your lips, trying to find the right words. ‘’I do not know how to put it into words… All I know is that when I inserted my finger inside myself, it felt good. But the tingles intensified and my finger wasn’t enough anymore. A-am I broken, Aegon?’’ 

He laughed quietly at the last remark. ‘’Broken? No. You’re not broken, my darling. You’re simply not doing it quite right. You see, in order to truly satisfy yourself when you’re all alone…a finger simply isn’t enough.’’ Aegon leaned in his seat, speaking closer to you. ‘’Would you like me to show you how to truly do it, properly?’’

You were most certain that you should not be doing this, but going back to the brothel was not a possibility at the moment. It was likely closed during the daytime and, although Helaena was a woman, you doubted she could be of help. 

Aegon stood and pulled you with him, guiding you to his bed. ‘’Lay down. Make yourself comfortable.’’

You scooted back until you hit the pillows, glaring at the sheet when your foot got stuck in it. If Aegon would make his bed in the mornings, it would not have happened. 

Once you were settled, he pulled your dress up, letting the layers bunch at your hips and pushed your legs apart. You were completely exposed to him, and rather than feeling uncomfortable under your uncle’s gaze, you spread yourself wider, desperate to feel good. 

‘’Gods,’’ Aegon growled under his breath. His hand gently rubbed your inner thigh, caressing your soft skin. ‘’You have one magnificent cunny, dear niece.’’ He moved his hand up the inside of your thigh, gently playing with your soft sparse hair there, almost teasingly. ‘’Makes me want to kiss it.’’ 

You whined, feeling a tinge of shyness at his compliment. ‘’Aegon…’’ 

‘’I mean it. I’ve seen a lot in my short life, but none ever compared.’’ He pressed his fingers firmly against you, making you mewl from the contact. 

It felt different from your own fingers. More pleasurable. 

Aegon kept up the circular motions, using a bit more pressure, as he watched your expression flicker with pleasure, your mouth open and eyebrows knitted as a moan slipped from your lips. He began swiping his thumb over your clit and it made you moan so loud anyone who was passing in the hallway must’ve heard. 

Your reaction made Aegon chuckle, amused. He brought a finger over your lips, shushing you. ‘’If you do this again, you’re gonna alert one of the maids. We don't want that, do we?’’ He stroked a piece of your hair, looking at you like you were the most beautiful woman he laid his eyes on.

You shook your head. ‘’I-I’ll be quiet,’’ you promised.

‘’Now, I’m going to put my fingers inside of you,’’ he explained as two fingers slipped down and entered you, sinking between your folds.

You gasped and pushed your hips against Aegon’s hand, realizing this was exactly what you needed. ‘’Ahh, this feels so good.’’

Aegon’s smirk widened, his eyes darkening with desire as he felt your hips move against him. ‘’See, nothing is broken. You just needed uncle Aegon’s help.’’ He increased the pace a bit, his fingers moving rapidly as your breath came in short gasps and moans as your mind got lost in the sensations. 

Your whole body was on fire, trembling by need as his thumb started rubbing your clit again. You felt the heat inside yourself intensify, you could feel the release you so desperately craved was building. 

You whined, grabbing the sheets next to you. ‘’A-Aegon, something feels strange. I think— I think I’m going to pee.’’ 

You squeezed your eyes shut and focused on not wetting the bed. How embarrassing would that be?  

‘’You’re not going to pee. Don’t worry.’’ Aegon continued his ministrations. ‘’This is good. This is exactly what you want.’’ 

‘’No. I’m going to pee, I’m going to—’’ You interrupted yourself as your back arched off the bed as your final release hit you, your hands fisting one of the pillows so hard you almost pierced a hole with your fingernails. 

Aegon’s free hand covered your mouth just in time, muffling your cries while you rode out your pleasure on his hand. 

⁂

You sat on your vanity chair while servants were cleaning up the aftermath of your bath. Your chamber smelled of lavender oil, which you poured into the water to help get a great night of sleep. The beds were luxurious in the Red Keep, but it lacked the comfort of home. 

‘’Will it be all, Princess?’’ your handmaid asked after brushing your freshly washed hair. 

You thanked her for her service. ‘’Yes. Thank you, Dyana.’’ 

‘’I will see you in the morning, Princess.’’ 

Dyana left your chambers, and you waited for the servants to do the same. You didn't want to press them, but you were impatient to watch them leave. 

Once everyone was out, you laid on your bed and pulled up your nightgown. 

At supper, you had sat across Aegon and your eyes had fallen on his hand holding his goblet of wine. Precisely his long, thick, and dexterous fingers. You knew it was sinful to have such thoughts during a family meal, but you had been unable to keep yourself from thinking about the intense pleasure Aegon's fingers brought you. You had to clamp your thighs under the table, feeling a needy ache in your cunny. 

Your fingertips skimmed over your folds, and you let out a small moan. You've been waiting all evening to do that. Your index finger slipped down to the pearl Aegon touched this afternoon and you made small, soft circles around it. A jolt of pleasure went up your spine. That felt so good. You continued rubbing soft circles, causing arousal to leak down your cunny. 

You ceased the attention to your clit and brought your middle finger down to your entrance, spreading your wetness before sinking your finger inside. A sweet moan echoed in the room, but you reminded yourself to be quiet. Always quiet. 

Closing your eyes, you imagined Aegon slipping his long, thick fingers deep inside you. Your walls clenched down on your finger, and then you slipped in a second. 

‘’Ah, Aegon.’’

Like the night prior, your fingers were too small to reach where you needed. Frowning in frustration, you searched around your chamber for something that resembled a finger. There was a forgotten spoon from when you had tea brought up — too small — and a wooden stick used to roll parchment paper — too big. Lastly, you saw your hairbrush on your vanity. Perfect. The handle of it was smooth, it shouldn’t hurt.

You wiped your fingers on the sheets and got up to grab it. You brought the hairbrush handle down to your cunny and paused. Although you were alone in your chamber, you couldn’t help but worry you would get in trouble if anyone found out about this. Shaking that thought, you cautiously pressed the handle to your hole, and steadily pushed it in. You felt your cunny squeezing and slighting bucking your hips at the brush. 

The sensation was foreign, but not unpleasant. As you pressed the handle deeper, you let out a soft gasp, quickly covering your mouth with your free hand to stifle any more sounds. You moved the brush handle gently at first, allowing your body to adjust to the unfamiliar intrusion.

Your other hand moved back to your clit, resuming the soft circles that had felt so good before. The combined sensations were intense, sending waves of pleasure through you. Your breath was short and your eyes fluttered closed as you imagined Aegon with you, his fingers instead of the brush.

The handle moved in and out, your movements growing more urgent as tears formed at the corner of your eyes, overwhelmed by pleasure. Your hips rocked against it, whining needily as you felt the pressure building, your muscles tightening as you edged closer to climax. Your walls clenched around the handle, and with one final push, the pleasure overwhelmed you. Your body shook with the force of your orgasm, your back arching off the bed. 

You stayed there for a moment, panting and trembling, the handle still inside you. That felt… You couldn’t find any words to describe it. 

Slowly, you pulled the hairbrush out, and placed it on the bed. Its handle was coated with your slick but you didn’t bother to clean it, pulling the covers over your body and drifting to sleep. 

⁂

‘’Good morrow, Uncle,’’ you greeted, crossing paths with Aemond in the halls of the Red Keep after breaking fast.

Aemond gave you a short nod.  ‘’Good morrow, Princess.’’

‘’Are you heading to the dragonpit?’’ you asked, noting the faint scent of smoke clinging to his black leather riding doublet. 

‘’No. Returning, actually.’’

A pout formed on your lips, disappointed. ‘’That's unfortunate. I was heading there and hoping we could go together. I would go with Aegon, but he is not a morning person, as you know.’’

‘’We could go in the morrow after breaking fast?’’ Aemond suggested, watching as a smile lit your face. 

⁂

Just as you were about to seek servants and ask them to prepare you a bath, Aegon knocked on your door and asked if you wanted to join him for another night in the city. He didn’t have any friends to accompany him, and Aemond was too much of a prude to go to brothels. Although you were younger, you didn’t have a stick up your ass. 

On the way, Aegon dropped a few gold coins and got you sweets from a street baker. He wiped the cherry glaze on your lips with his thumb, sucking it into his mouth. 

You sat at a table and indulged in wine amongst the men. Around you, women were dancing in their smallest clothes, entertaining the customers inside the brothel. Beside you, Aegon watched the curious fascination on your face while sipping his wine, pleased to see you were having fun. He made sure to drink enough to relax, but not too much he wouldn’t be able to keep an eye out.

When you finished your cup, Aegon rose to his feet and took you to the back of the brothel. Excitement was bubbling in your stomach, hearing the sounds of pleasure coming from men and women behind each of the curtains. 

As you entered one of the rooms, a woman came up to Aegon and begged to suck his cock for free, desperately wanting a taste of the prince. She was only wearing a piece of cloth tied into a skirt, her small breasts and pointy nipples bared to all. 

‘’Watch and learn, little one. Your future husband will enjoy this,’’ Aegon said with a wink. 

He shoved his breeches down, exposing his surprisingly large cock to everyone in the room. You stared at it with wide eyes. Were all the cocks big? You peaked around you, searching for comparisons, but nothing seemed to come close. 

When you drew your eyes back to your uncle, the woman was kneeling before Aegon, his cock already in her mouth. The action surprised you, but you took notes and watched as she bobbed her head down his shaft, sucking and slurping as spit dribbled from her mouth. Your eyes flickered to Aegon, who was groaning, taking pleasure from the woman’s mouth. 

‘’Agh, fuck,’’ he slurred, his head slightly back. ‘’That mouth is made to suck cocks!’’ 

On the ground, the woman looked satisfied to please him. She moaned as Aegon grabbed a fistful of her hair and forced himself deeper into her mouth, groaning obscenely until he released his semen down her throat. Some spilled from her lips, but Aegon didn’t wipe it off like he did with the cherry glaze. He pushed her off him and re-dressed himself. 

‘’Do all men enjoy this?’’ you asked. 

He chuckled softly before responding. His eyes met your wide, curious gaze. ‘’Oh yes, most men enjoy it very much. Now, would you like another cup of wine?’’ 

You smiled. ‘’Please.’’ 

You sat on a couch by yourself, waiting for Aegon’s return. Before you, a woman was getting her cunny pounded by a bearded man. She moaned loudly, grabbing at her nipples. The sight made you think of the hairbrush you had inserted in yourself last night. It had filled you up nicely, but you couldn’t help but wonder how delightful a cock must feel.

Lost in your thoughts, you didn’t notice the man who approached you until he grabbed your hand and placed it on his cock. You froze, a bewildered look on your face. He said something, but you couldn’t hear it, too focused on how clammy and hairy he felt. You tried to retract your hand, but he gripped it tightly, forcing you to rub him.

The Gods must have heard your prayers because Aegon returned with the wine and saw what was happening. His jaw clenched, and his eyes narrowed in anger. He quickly stepped in, his presence commanding attention.

‘’Let go of her or I’ll cut your fucking cock,’’ he threatened through clenched teeth, his hand on the dagger tucked into his belt. His voice was low and deadly, leaving no doubt that he meant every word.

The man’s eyes widened in surprise when he heard Aegon, and his grip on your hand loosened enough for you to slip away. You wiped it on the skirt of your dress, trying to erase the feeling of the stranger’s cock. Washing them with soap and water would have been better, but there was no bassin to do so.

‘’I-I apologize, my prince. I did not know the whore was yours—’’ the man stuttered, making excuses, but  Aegon didn’t want to hear them. 

He grabbed his shoulder and pinned him against the wall, bringing the dagger to his throat.  The man's eyes widened further as the dagger's blade pressed against his skin, fear flashing on his face. ‘’She’s not a fucking whore,’’ Aegon’s voice was low and dangerous, his eyes burning with rage. 

The man swallowed hard. ‘’I-I apologize again, my prince. I meant no disrespect.’’

Aegon took a step closer, the dagger still at the man's throat. ‘’Don’t. Touch. Her. Again.’’ He looked down at his manly parts, then back at his face. ‘’Unless you want to lose your little cock.’’ 

 ⁂

The journey back to the Red Keep was silent. Aegon's grip on your hand was tight, his knuckles white from the tension. He was fuming, his eyes still narrowed in anger, his mind clearly still consumed by anger from the incident at the brothel. He kept you close, his gaze scanning the surroundings to ensure no one else tried to approach you. 

When you finally reached the safety of the castle, he stopped in his tracks and turned to you. Guilt was consuming him. What happened was his fault. If he hadn’t left your side, this man would not have forced your delicate hand on his filthy cock.

Aegon opened his mouth to speak, then shook his head. He walked past you, abandoning you in the secret passages. 

—

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[midnightcrw]

I almost lost you

Pairing: Cregan Stark x fem!reader

Summary: You never thought you could be as sad as you are now.

Warnings: mention of losing your child, being stabbed (tell me if there should be more triggering things in this one-shot)

a/n: Even though I have never watched hotd before and only heard what happens in the show, I fell in love with Cregan Stark even though he was there for a few minutes. Also note that I'm not the best at writing, especially when it comes to hotd.

You thought you knew what sadness was when you couldn't get pregnant even after being married to Cregan for over a year, but this feeling was far worse.

You had finally fallen pregnant a few weeks ago, and that was probably one of the happiest times for you, as you had not told your husband and were waiting for the perfect moment, but things changed drastically when someone broke into your bedchambers while you were alone. You didn't even have time to react when a man wearing a cloak stabbed you and left you bleeding on the floor.

Painful wasn't even enough to describe it. It was agonizing the way your body froze in shock and you only registered the way the knife was pulled out of your stomach. You couldn't even remember the last four days because you were only lying in bed, not a single word leaving your lips as you had to process what had happened.

Cregan had not been here since that night. He was looking for the man who did it and he was furious, at least that's what the maid had said.

Slowly sitting up, your back now resting on the pillows as you traced the area of your injury, covered by a bandage and your nightgown over it.

"Lady Stark!" A woman's loud voice made you flinch as your heart threatened to burst out of your chest. Your eyes, now wide open, looked at the woman as you realized it was one of the handmaids.

"I'm sorry, my lady, but you didn't respond," the young woman said apologetically, looking down in shame. "Don't worry, it was my fault for letting my mind wander. Why did you come here?" Your voice sounded scratchy as you spoke for the first time in days.

"Lord Cregan Stark has arrived and wanted to know if you would like him to come in," at the mention of his name you got nervous, not knowing what was going to happen, but you nodded and motioned for her to let him in.

Only her footsteps could be heard as you began to fiddle with your fingers. You wanted to see him, but at the same time you didn't, too afraid of disappointing him.

The movement of your fingers stopped abruptly as you felt the bed sink down and your name was called softly in a whisper.

You were both in love with each other even before you got married, and you were perfectly content to call each other by name rather than by some title. It made you both more comfortable and felt better than calling him 'Lord' or you 'Lady'.

But in that moment, you wished he wouldn't. You wished that he would treat you as heartlessly as you deserved.

"Please look at me," his gruff voice was the only thing you could hear besides the wind from outside and you hadn't dared to look up, it felt like someone was starting to strangle you until you couldn't breathe anymore.

Your eyes were still looking down and you could see his hand hesitating to touch you as he pleaded with you again and this time you listened.

Slowly, you looked at him, your eyes almost lifeless as Cregan's were filled with concern.

When your husband opened his mouth to speak, you interrupted him by whispering, "I was with child.

And that's when Cregan's expression turned to confusion. No one had told him since you had wanted to be the one to break the news, but unfortunately not in the way you had wished for.

"What?" It was the first time you had ever heard his voice so strained. He started to shake his head in shock as his eyes moved rapidly to find even a hint of a lie on your face and when he didn't find it, the silence grew.

You hated it, you hated the way he looked at you in sadness and you hated it even more that he wasn't angry with you.

"I couldn't even give you an heir," your voice finally broke as a tear ran down your face, your lip trembling as you bit down on it to keep yourself from bursting, but the moment Cregan's arms engulfed your frame, you began to sob your heart out as your body shook while your husband tightened his hold on you.

Even though you couldn't see Cregan's face as it was buried in the crook of your neck, you knew he was letting his tears fall as you felt them on your skin, and it wasn't because of the child, it was because he was terrified of losing you.

Every day he had made it clear that the only thing he ever wanted was for you to be alive, happy and healthy. Not once had he complained about the lack of a child in your life, because he was content to have you around.

"That's the least of an issue, yeah?" He said as he kissed your cheek, still holding you in his arms. "We can always try again whenever you want, alright? The only thing that's important is that you let your body heal first," he said as his lips kissed your tear-stained face several times while reassuring you.

"But you need an heir," you sobbed softly as he let go of your body to hold the sides of your face in his hands. The look on his face suddenly became stern as he maintained eye contact, "An heir can wait." He said as he slowly touched his forehead to yours, "I almost lost you," he fretted as his eyes became glassy like you'd never seen them before.

His beautiful eyes that you could never look away from and now all you wanted to do was look away, not to see the fear in them.

"But you didn't," you replied, "Yes, I didn't, and I've never been more grateful for anything in my life," the moment he finished his sentence, your lips met his with an urgency that was almost primal.

The kiss was raw and filled with emotions that neither of you could put into words. It was desperate, a clash of needs that both you and Cregan could feel as your hearts pounded against your chests.

Your hands tightly curled the fabric of his top as one hand cupped your face while the other tangled in your hair. The two of you were almost breathless as he pulled away to rest his forehead on yours for a second before giving your now swollen lips a feather light peck and pulling away completely.

Your eyes traveled the contours of his face as he began to speak breathlessly, "We should sleep, it is late," you merely nodded as he stood to undress.

And not once did you look away as he undressed, the scars around his skin always drawing your attention. Some of them were already so pale that you couldn't see them unless you got close, while the rest were in shades of red.

Catching yourself staring, you quickly shook your head and moved down to rest your head on the pillow, and a moment later, your husband was lying next to you, his chest unclothed.

"Your wound hasn't caused any problems, has it?" He asked as he turned to the side to get a better look at you.

Your hand made its way to touch the spot where your wound was, "It's healing well, from what I've been told."

"Can I see it?" Cregan seemed hesitant as he spoke, but you only nodded, slowly pulling up your nightgown as you lay on your side for him to see.

The moment your wound was visible, Cregan gently touched your skin. "It's already scarred," he murmured as his eyes inspected the red scar on your stomach.

"It looks ugly," you said as you slowly pulled the material down until your husband stopped you, "You never told me that mine looked ugly."

Without hiding the truth, you muttered, "Because yours are beautiful.

Cregan shook his head at your answer, his eyes softening a fraction as he looked at you, "That's not true. Both of our scars look the same, but you can't see beauty in yours just because it's marring your skin and not mine"

Without letting you respond, he continued, "You are beautiful, inside and out. There's no need to call any part of you ugly because you're insulting my wife, the love of my life, and the lady of Winterfell."

Not saying anything, you buried your face in his chest and that was enough for him, to feel your heart beating against his as you held on to him.

[tasteracha]

a/n: hey @chvnnie remember when you asked me to write this like a year ago? i did it. inspired by that one skzcode clip of seungmin teasing felix and felix getting pissed off. warnings: seunglix x afab!reader, meanish dom felix, sub seungmin, smut - MINORS DNI.

you’re woken up by jarring voices, the tv that had been providing you background noise for your slumber having gone to sleep shortly after you did. it takes you a moment to identify the sounds, your brain coming online a few moments after your heart, beating rapidly in your chest from being kicked out of unconsciousness so abruptly. 

“you don’t have to be so fucking mean all the time,” you register felix’s voice first, a dangerousness hiding in his dark tone that doesn’t come out often. he’s usually so positive even when he’s in a bad mood, optimism cracking away at any negative emotions in a way you admire. 

“i wasn’t being mean,” seungmin scoffs in return, and you can hear him walking down the hallway towards the living room where you laid with bated breath. “you’re just being sensitive, lix.”

oh, he’s done it now. 

seungmin sees you first, a blinding smile taking over his face as he walks over to you to run a hand through your hair. you relax into his touch, relishing in the comfort while knowing that a fight was about to break out soon - you knew the difference between felix being sensitive and being genuinely angry. 

right now, even without seeing his face, you knew it was the latter. 

felix walks into the room and you swear he looks six feet tall, standing with his arms crossed and a look on his face. it makes you shiver though it isn’t directed at you, and it goes unnoticed by seungmin even though his hand is still buried in your hair - he was too occupied with smirking at felix, pouring gasoline into a fire that was already blazing towards the ceiling. 

you know what they say, play with fire and you’ll get burned. you hope that seungmin was prepared for what is about to occur. 

“you want me to take care of this, lix?” you ask, your role of Professional Seungmin Tamer coming increasingly more natural as the days went on. it is a last ditch effort to calm the flames. 

“no,” felix’s jaw is set in a hard line, and you can see his teeth grinding together. “i’ll take care of him myself.”

“take care of him myself,” seungmin mocks, snickering to himself for a moment before choking around it from the sudden feeling of felix’s hand around his jaw. felix has moved like a ghost, crossing the room in quick strides and covering seungmin’s body with his own in a silent motion. seungmin’s hand falls from your hair, reaching up to wrap around felix’s wrist - not moving it away, but rather bracing himself against the storm.

seungmin is usually taller than felix, but he’s left looking up at him because of how his knees buckle. despite his clear disadvantage, seungmin lets out a growl at felix’s touch.

“awh, you going to bark for me?” felix coos at him, not an ounce of warmth behind his words. “puppy.”

“you wish,” seungmin hisses out, the breath leaving him completely when felix tightens his grip on his jaw and uses the other one to brace the back of his neck, trapping seungmin completely against him. 

“how can you say that when i can tell you want me so bad already?” felix says, looking something wicked as he wedges a thigh between seungmin’s legs. from where you are you can’t see the younger man’s crotch but you’re certain that his jeans are tented with arousal; your own core was starting to pulse with heat just from watching them, despite you not being touched by either of them. 

“i don’t want you,” seungmin scoffs, trying to turn his face out of felix’s grip and failing. he was lying; seungmin always wanted felix, but nine times out of ten it was on his own terms. you can only imagine how fast seungmin’s head was spinning right now at the sudden change in dynamics. 

watching seungmin twitch his hips against felix’s thigh was maddening. this is the first time you’ve seen felix take control of seungmin like this. maybe felix would make seungmin ride his thigh - that was something you’d be delighted to see. 

“then why are you so hard?” felix’s mouth twists into a grin, wicked and sharp, as he presses his leg further forward, putting pressure on seungmin’s cock and making him moan. 

seungmin, for all his false bravado, submitted beautifully and easily when it was for you. it didn’t surprise you that he did it for felix too, but the sight of his muscles losing their tautness all at once was something to behold. he falls into felix’s arms, boneless and grinding his hips in little circles against the older’s thigh, the fight drained out of his body as quickly as it had arrived.  

“i hate you,” seungmin mutters weakly against felix’s chest as he chases a high he must know he won’t be allowed just yet. the fight left his body, not his mouth, evidently. 

“you’re just making this worse for yourself with every word,” felix chuckles, dry and mean, as he turns seungmin around and pushes him roughly forward. seungmin stumbles and throws a glare over his shoulder, but the effect is lost when he continues to let felix manhandle him. 

“baby,” felix calls out to you, his tone shifting to warmth instantly. you perk your head up and you can’t suppress the shiver that wracks through your body as he cocks his head towards the bedroom while leading seungmin there, a clear invitation to join them for whatever felix was planning to do. you’re on your feet before you can blink, anticipation burning through your veins. 

you have to pause and take a deep breath when you reach the door frame before going in; you knew that what was about to happen was like a fantasy pulled from the deepest depths of your mind. when you gather the nerve to peek inside, seungmin is already naked on the bed, his bottom lip hidden between his teeth as felix fastens his wrists to the headboard with the soft ropes that typically adorn his own. 

“open your mouth,” felix digs his fingers into seungmin’s lips, ignoring how the younger thrashes against the bonds keeping him in place. felix leans forward so that he’s kneeling over seungmin and slides his free hand into his dark hair, scratching softly at his scalp before curling his fingers into a fist and pulling.  “this is all the lube you’re getting, so unless you want me to fuck you dry you’d better do as i say.”

the words sound unpracticed as they spill out of felix’s lips, but seungmin’s lips part with a gasp nonetheless. he chokes on the digits as felix explores his mouth, reaching every crevice and swiping around his annoyingly white teeth. his fingers coming out glistening with saliva, wet and dripping as he lines them up with seungmin’s hole. 

felix opens seungmin up brutally, sliding two fingers in and cooking them up with a look of satisfaction on his face when seungmin jumps. it was a caricature of their usual dynamic, with felix typically melted into the sheets as seungmin uses him however he sees fit. felix finds seungmin’s spot with practiced ease, letting out a laugh when seungmin cries out at the intense pleasure. he avoids it after, scissoring his fingers almost clinically, teasing seungmin with the sensation that is so close but that he won’t be granted.

contrary to his claim, felix squirts a generous amount of lube on his cock once he undresses before he pushes in slowly, letting seungmin feel the drag of every inch. the younger’s breaths come out in violent shudders, and as you step closer to look his pupils are almost completely blown over his irises, barely a hint of chocolate brown to be seen. 

felix presses a kiss to seungmin’s forehead when he bottoms out, the gentlest touch he’s given him since he started. it shows how spaced out seungmin is that he leans up into the touch, craving felix’s touch like he would starve without it. seungmin’s eyes are glassy, a spaced out expression taking over his face that you’ve never seen before. he tends not to let his guard down, even during the most intimate moments that you share, and you hope that you get to witness this again. 

felix keeps a steady pace, dragging out slowly before pushing back in with a snap, driving seungmin further up the bed with every movement. 

“love?” felix calls out, and both you and seungmin make a noise. you know that felix was talking to you only when he ignores seungmin completely, continuing to snap his hips, pulling breathy whines from seungmin with every thrust. “will you come here?”

he says it like a question but your body thinks of it as a command as you float over to him, stopping just inches from the bed. felix unfastens seungmin’s wrists from the headboard, keeping them pinned together, and pulls him up. he turns him and wraps his arms around his chest until they are both kneeling upright, flush against one another. his cock remains buried inside of seungmin the whole time and you can’t help but give him a look of impressed approval. he looks pointedly at you and then the space he cleared out in front of seungmin in response, and you flush as you kick off your sweatpants and climb into the bed, laying on your back. 

when did felix learn how to tell you what to do with just a look? you didn’t know where this was coming from, but you loved it. 

felix places seungmin gently onto you with the carefulness that you expected from him on any other day. if it weren’t for him not wanting to crush you with seungmin’s weight, you were sure he would have thrown the younger onto the bed with little to no thought. seungmin settles against you like he belongs there, nuzzling his face into the juncture between your shoulder and your neck, and you can feel how hot his cheeks are against your skin. his cock settles between your thighs, hard and rigid, and you let out a sympathetic hum when felix stops him from rutting up against you. he reaches around seungmin and lines the younger man up against your hole, a little clumsy with his movements, and you can feel his leaking cock twitch against you. 

felix pushes seungmin into you with a snap of his own hips, driving himself deep into seungmin as he gets buried into you in one motion. the moans you and seungmin let out harmonize into the thick air, the scent of sex swirling with the noises in a colorful kaleidoscope. the colors burst into fireworks as felix sets a fast pace, pleasuring the both of you so naturally. 

felix leans past seungmin to kiss you over the younger’s head, and seungmin keens at the sight of it. he’s sandwiched between the two of you, chasing pleasure from every angle, and witnessing the two people he loves most in the world make out on top of him - you’re not sure that he can even think in coherent sentences right now. with his cock surrounded by your tight heat and felix’s own ramming into him, you’re surprised he can even keep his eyes open. you know that this is the moment where he surrenders himself to felix completely. 

you reach your limit faster than you ever have, your clit untouched and throbbing; just the obscene sight of seungmin being used between you and felix is enough to bring you to the brink of pleasure.  

“seung- lix, can’t,” you gasp out, every push of felix’s hips driving seungmin’s cock further into you, making you jolt - it’s too much. 

if it’s too much for you, you can’t imagine what it’s like for seungmin.

you thought that felix would take pity on you and let you finish, too focused on punishing seungmin, but instead he pulls out of the younger man and pulls him out of you with a harsh pull. 

seungmin all but wails at the loss, bucking his hips down onto the mattress. you hadn’t realized how close he was, too lost in your own high, but his brow was pinched and his lips were twisted just right to tell you that he was. 

“please, please,” he begs, flipping himself over to kneel in front of felix. “let me come, please.”

“you think you deserve to after what you did today?” felix looks down at him, eyes cold as ice. your own neglected orgasm was brushed away by the sight of seungmin begging. he was usually too proud to beg, too in control of situations to even need to, but in this moment he was completely helpless to felix’ whims. 

“i’m sorry,” seungmin loses control over the tears brimming in his eyes, fat tears dripping onto his cheeks. “‘m sorry, sorry, didn’t mean to-”

he falls forward into felix’s chest, entire body shaking with his shuddering breaths, and you see felix falter for the first time tonight. he looks at you with slight panic, the coldness melting away into affection towards the man crying into him, and you simply nod at him. you know what to do, you blink. you can do this, you smile. 

“puppy,” felix shushes him, running a hand down seungmin’s spine. “it’s okay. you’re being so good for me now, right? my good boy.”

“‘m good,” seungmin hiccups into felix’s chest, nodding his tears into felix’s skin. 

“you’re sorry, and you’ve been punished, right?” felix coos at him, trailing his blunt fingernails up and down seungmin’s back. “you’re alright.”

“i can come?” seungmin’s words come out nasally from his tears. 

“yes, puppy,” felix moves his thigh so that it’s between seungmin’s legs, trapping his weeping cock against the flexed muscle there. “take what you need.”

seungmin whines out a broken thank you and starts his hips at a rapid pace, chasing the high that he had been denied over and over. you lose count of the sniffles, whines, and moans he lets out, but you can tell exactly when he comes because his entire body seizes and his throat constricts around a high keen. 

felix strokes his back through it, shushing him and pressing gentle kisses to his cheeks and face. you can’t help but smile at the gestures, a little overwhelmed at how naturally felix fell into this rhythm.  your smile freezes when his own turns sharp, and he winks at you before flipping seungmin over and sliding back into him. he pushes seungmin down onto the bed and the push of hot breath he puffs out at the impact hits your forgotten cunt. felix pushes one hand down onto seungmin’s nape as he fucks back into him, chasing his own high and nurturing your own. 

you can feel seungmin’s lips trembling against your core with every thrust, his body pushing up against yours until he’s trapped between your legs. he licks at you un uncoordinated motions, but it’s enough. a few beats of time later, between the harsh slaps of felix’s thighs hitting seungmin’s ass and seungmin reaching up to squeeze his hands around your thighs, you come with a content sigh. your legs tighten around seungmin, keeping him close as your hips jerk against his mouth, and the sounds of felix coming are drowned out by the blood rushing through your ears. 

the next few moments pass by like snapshots, blurred images separated by shocks of camera flutter, and by the time your brain catches up with your body you’re laying down in a new position. your head is pillowed on felix’ chest, him sandwiched between you and seungmin, the latter’s fingers tangled between yours. 

“what the hell just happened,” you blink a few times, jaw almost dropping open when you see the utter contentment on felix’s face. 

“i think i discovered something new,” felix’ voice is languid, rumbling against your ear like a muted symphony. 

“if this is what it takes for you to learn things, we need to piss you off more often,” you tease, teasing a finger around felix’s nipple just to hear him hiss and see the soft glare he sends towards you. like a kitten. 

a puppy and a kitten; what were you going to do with these boys?

“speak for yourself,” seungmin mumbles from felix’s other side, coming back to himself slowly. he glances blearily at you, and his drying tear tracks and red rimmed eyes make him look so incredibly beautiful. “i can’t move a single one of my limbs.”

[viceroywrites]

deja vu - part 1

i decided to make a full-fledged multi-chapter fic out of this idea that i posted a few days ago with a cyoa ending potentially

thanks so much to everyone who showed so much love for it and hope you enjoy this series!

this is my first time writing for gravity falls so i hope to do it justice!

planning out your road trip through the pacific northwest, you find yourself inexplicably drawn to the town of gravity falls.

little did you know that this town held more memories than you could have possibly imagined.

too bad you didn't remember any of them.

stan x fem!reader/ford x fem!reader

original fic idea | part two

tag list: @awitchersbard / @theilluminatidragonqueen / @jazzypop-op/ @maryclanders/ @chaimshelii /

@starship606/ @swimmingrascalbatdragon / @stanfordsbaby

He wasn’t in bed.

You woke up in the middle of the night to find the space beside you empty, the blankets cool to touch, indicating that a warm body had not even slipped into the sheets. Begrudgingly, you slip out of the warm comfort of your bed to search for your lover.

Your bare feet pad against the wood floorboards, creaking with each step you take. Your fingers balancing a candle that you used to illuminate the way, too lazy to try and turn on the lights. 

You descend down to the basement, pushing open the metal door that reveals an intricate lab full of oddities and gadgets with a triangle shaped portal looming just behind the glass window. You let out a yawn, approaching the figure that had his back turned towards you. His six-fingers spin the pen in his hand effortlessly as he rests his chin in the palm of his hand.

Your soft yet groggy voice calls out as you place your hand on his shoulder, “Ford, come to bed. Your research will be here in the morning.”

Stanford jumps at your sudden touch before relaxing when he hears the sound of your voice. He puts his pen down, placing his hand over yours with his thumb running soothingly over the back of your hand, “I’ll be there soon, just head back upstairs. I just need to finish this last equation that's been driving me mad the whole day.”

“Stanford…” You say with an edge to your voice, knowing that he could easily stay up the rest of the night working tirelessly on this portal that he had been working on for the past few months.

“Alright… I concede. You win this round, my dear.” Ford sighs, turning to face you finally with a tired smile. He gets up from his seat, pressing a soft kiss against the top of your head before following you up the stairs but not before looking back at the portal.

-

You had the dream again.

It always starts the same. Walking down a staircase, the floorboards creaked with each step you took. Your eyelids feel heavy almost as if you’re resisting the urge to fall asleep. Your feet carrying you down to a basement. The warm flames of the candle you hold illuminating the way.

Your fingertips push the cool metal frame of the door to reveal a figure sitting in front of a desk, facing away from you. Your hand reaches out to touch their shoulder and as they turn around to reveal their face to you, you awaken.

Your eyes open abruptly, staring at the dark ceiling as your alarm echoes through the empty room. Slowly sitting up in bed, you instinctively reach across to turn off your alarm and turn on your lamp before your hand reaches to open the drawer of your bedside table, feeling around for something. Your fingertips brush against leather and wrap around the item, pulling it out to reveal a journal.

These dreams happened almost every night over the years. It had gotten to a point where you started logging them, just trying to find any pattern or meaning behind them.

You turn to the page labeled ‘The Basement’ - adding another tally mark in the margins that you used to keep track of the frequency of each dream. You close your eyes, trying to conjure up any distinguishable features from this mystery person but nothing new arises. 

Sighing, you shut the leather-bound journal, putting it to the side.

Now was not the time to be worrying about your cryptic dreams, you were supposed to be getting ready for the trip you had been planning for the past few months. 

A road trip through the Pacific Northwest, starting in Northern California and making your way up to Seattle.

You hop out of bed to start getting ready for your journey ahead. After completing your morning routine and slipping on some comfortable clothing for the long drive, you make your way to the kitchen, grabbing the map that was stuck to the fridge with a magnet from your alma mater, Backupsmore. 

Having already packed your bags into the car the night before, your feet make a beeline out the door, wanting to hit the road before sunrise to give you enough time to hit the places you wanted to visit on the way up to your final destination for the day, Portland. 

Unraveling the map in your lap, your eyes scan over it, reviewing over the route you had planned out today. Your gaze lingered on one particular spot you had circled closer to Portland that was unlike any of the stops you had chosen.

Gravity Falls.

You couldn’t explain what drew you in to choose this town to stop in out of all the surrounding towns near Portland. You knew that you had an old friend, Fiddleford, who had moved out to this area to do research. You had even visited him once during his time out there. However, you hadn’t heard from Fiddleford in years, correspondence seemingly dropping off as he stopped answering your calls and your letters always ended up returning to you.

Trying to push aside thoughts of your lost connection, you put your car in reverse, pulling out of your parking spot and heading out onto the open road. The winding roads take you through the lush forests that enveloped the region. As each hour passed, you could see the sun slowly starting to make its way up the horizon and decided to stop to watch the sunrise at Redwood National Park. 

After the brief stop that you used to stretch your legs and grab a cup of coffee, you make your way back on the road. Your original plan was to stop at almost every National Park on the way up to Oregon but after hitting a pocket of traffic that put you behind a whole hour, you decide to skip a few stops and make your way directly to the town of Gravity Falls, figuring it would be your last stop with the remaining amount of daylight you had left.

Unfortunately, you had hit another bump in the road, pretty much derailing the first day of your methodically planned out trip.

Your car had suddenly stopped in the middle of the forest about five miles out from the town.

Cursing under your breath, you step out to assess the cause of your delay. Your hands pop open the hood of your car, breathing a slight sigh of relief when you don’t see any steam or smoke. Figuring that the most likely cause is the battery dying on you, you pull out your phone, trying to look up the nearest towing company to hopefully bring you into town to get it looked at.

As you’re waiting for the screen to load due to the poor signal out in this forested area, a gruff voice calls out, asking if you need a hand.

You look up to see a red convertible with the phrase ‘El Diablo’ etched on the side on the other side of the road. Its owner, a man with gray hair, glasses and a stubbled yet chiseled jawline, wearing a black tank, a shiny medallion that sat on his exposed graying chest hairs, and a brown leather jacket, stares back at you, one hand on the steering wheel while his arm dangles lazily outside of the rolled down window.

You pause, taken aback as something about his features seems… familiar. You quickly snap out of your stupor, realizing you’ve just been standing there in silence.

"Uhm… yeah if you have jumper cables, I just need to get my car running to get to the next town and hopefully get a replacement battery,” You reply, figuring this option would be way cheaper than hiring a whole tow truck.

"Of course, I have jumper cables, toots - look at my car, you think I haven't been stranded out here myself." The stranger chuckles, making an effortless U-Turn with one hand before pulling his car close to yours. Your cheeks warm at the nickname given to you by this man you met literally seconds ago, This guy’s a total silver fox.

You step to the side to give him access to hook up the jumper cables after he fishes them out of his own trunk. You both stand in silence while he attaches the cables to your car before his deep voice cuts through, "So uh, what brings you out here? You just driving through?"

You almost chuckle at his awkward attempt to make small talk, "Sort of. I'm doing a whole road trip through the Pacific Northwest. I was gonna check out this town ahead, Gravity Falls, before I make my way up to Portland."

The older man blinks, expecting you to just be passing through the town at this time of a day. Normally, tourists only stop into town in the early hours of the day on their own journeys up north. His lips spread into a grin, pulling out a business card from his leather jacket. "Well, if you're stopping by, you gotta check out the Mystery Shack! One stop shop for mysterious oddities!"

You take the business card with a giant question mark on the front. He retreats back to his car, turning on his engine before nodding over at you as a signal for you to start up your own engine. You slip back into the car, slipping the card into your pocket before turning on the ignition. You breathe a sigh of relief as your car stutters back to life. Glancing up, you see him grinning back at you before the two of you step out of your respective vehicles.

“Thanks again for your help… sorry, I didn’t catch your name. I’m Y/N.” You say, extending your hand out in gratitude. The silver fox’s large hand envelops yours, shaking your hand firmly, “Stan Pines, nice to meet ya. It’s no problem, wouldn’t want to leave a lady like yourself stranded in the middle of the woods.”

“Do you say that to all the ladies that end up stranded in the woods?” You can’t help but tease, earning a hearty chuckle from Stan. “Well, let’s just say that’s not a common occurrence out here. So you thinkin’ about stopping by the Mystery Shack?”

You pause, stuffing your hands into your pockets as you thumb the edge of the business card Stan had given you. On one hand, you should probably be heading back on the road to make it to Portland and this Mystery Shack sounded like a tourist trap. On the other hand, the sun was starting to set and you weren’t keen on driving through the forest in the dark. Maybe it would be best if you stayed the night in this quaint town and start again the next morning. As you look up at Stan, you make your decision, deciding to appease the man who helped you so graciously.

You also had to admit you found him quite charming and curiosity got the better of you.

“Sure, lead the way.” You say with a casual shrug. Stan grins, “I’ll make sure you get a personal tour of the Mystery Shack. No need to worry about other tourists.” Your eyebrow raises in amusement before slipping into your car, “What, you know the owner?” You blink at the smirk that spreads across Stan’s lips, “Sweetheart, you’re looking at the former owner, Mr. Mystery himself.”

You bite back a giggle, “No wonder you were laying it on thick, just trying to get more tourists to visit, huh?” Stan rolls his eyes mirthfully “Hey, I was trying to lend a helping hand… though I have a good sales pitch, don’t I?” He grins, shooting finger guns towards you with a wink.

This’ll be interesting. You think to yourself as you follow behind Stan in your car, pulling into the empty lot of the Mystery Shack. You snort, seeing how the S dangles off the side spelling out Mystery Hack, before pointing it out to Stan as he exits his car. His features grimace as he grumbles out, “I noticed” before beckoning you to follow him, twirling his keys on his index finger.

Stan proceeded to give you a detailed tour of the Mystery Shack, spinning elaborate tales surrounding the variety of taxidermy animals that he had mismatched together. Despite the absurdity of it all, you can’t help but get sucked into his tales, seeing the clear passion and excitement he had for this place. You burst out into laughter at the sight of the Sascrotch to which Stan beamed at, “Good one, right? Probably one of the highlights of the Mystery Shack.”

You weaved your way through the shack, though there were certain sections of it that looked oddly familiar. Almost like you had walked down these hallways before. A wave of deja vu hit you as you walked through the doorway into the gift shop. “Usually this is the part where I try to sell people on an overpriced souvenir but I have a feeling that the whole schtick isn’t gonna work on you, is it?” Stan admits.

“Probably not but I’ll take a look around and see if there’s anything that catches my eye.” You chuckle, making your way around the space as your eyes scan the various trinkets. Your fingertips run across the mugs with question marks painted on them. You decide to use this opportunity to make small talk as you mill around the gift shop while Stan leans back against the counter, “So, you said you’re the former owner? Who owns it now?”

“One of my former employees, Soos. Kid’s been working for me since he was… well a kid. Only person with as much passion as me about this place.” Stan says, glancing over at the Employee of the Month picture that still hung behind the counter that showed a younger Soos. “What made you step down as owner?” You hum, thumbing through the t-shirt rack. 

Stan smiles fondly, “Me and my twin brother actually just got back from traveling, we’re only in town for the summer. It was always our dream to travel the world together by boat, and we finally got to make that happen.” You look up, smiling at how warmly he spoke of his brother. Stan catches you staring and crosses his arms defensively, “What?”

“Nothing,” You say, shaking your head before thumbing through the assortment of keychains and stickers that were displayed. “So twin brother, huh? What’s he like?”

“You’re sure asking a lot of questions… not sure if I should be flattered but it feels like I’m being interrogated by a government official.” Stan comments with a grin. You pause with dramatic effect before looking up and admitting, “Well technically, I do work for the government.”

Stan freezes, his stance becoming defensive as he looks you up and down, “Oh shit, really? Man, these cover-ups are getting better and better but I swear I haven’t broken any laws… recently at least.” Your warm laughter fills the room, finding the look on his face priceless, “Relax, I work for the National Parks.” Stan’s posture relaxes at the realization and he rolls his eyes, “Alright, you got me good. So what do you do? Are you like a park ranger or something?”

“No, I’m a geoscientist. I pretty much study rocks and fossils. Kinda boring day to day but sometimes I’ll come across a precious gemstone and keep it for myself… even though we’re not supposed to take anything off a dig site.” You admit sheepishly, rubbing the back of your neck. “Using the government’s resources to your own advantage? I like the way you think.” Stan chuckles.

You pick out a magnet to add to your fridge when you return as a reminder of your side quest at the Mystery Shack. Stan rings you up though you notice a significant markdown in the original price after he insists on giving you the employee discount. As you walk out of the gift shop outside, you round the corner back to your car. 

Little did you know that you would run into the man that you once loved as someone with a long tan trench coat was outside fiddling with a device with his back turned to you. Stan elbows you in the arm to catch your attention, "That's my poindexter brother that I mentioned, Ford. He's always working on some geeky invention."

"You know I can hear you, Stanley?" Ford sighs, turning around to face you two.

Time slows down as he meets your eyes, memories flooding back to him before landing on the last memory he had of you - your back turning away from him, your hand slipping through his fingers after he chose to continue with his research despite your pleas.

He freezes, seeing the woman that left him all those years ago, "Y/N?" He calls out to you.

You blink, staring back at this man that you had never met before calling out your name.

Stan is just as confused as you are, looking between the two of you. 

You tilt your head in confusion, “Uhm… sorry, have we met before? How do you know my name?”

[harrysfolklore]

first win - op81

gif by @princemick <33

summary: the road to oscar’s first grand prix win. wc: 3.4K

folkie radio: OSC’S FIRST WIN 🥹🥹🥹 that race that so stressful but he did it and i’m so happy! fun fact: i wrote this fic last night bc i just FELT oscar was winning, i just added today’s race a few hours ago 😭 i hope you like it! leave feedback

MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

February 5, 2023. Bahrain Grand Prix

Today was the big day. Oscar Piastri was set to make his Formula 1 debut as a McLaren driver.

You've talked about this countless of times, sharing dreams and fears, mapping out every step of his journey from karting to the pinnacle of motorsport.

Now, as you stood in the garage with the crowd's energy buzzing around you, it was hard to believe that moment had finally arrived.

Oscar was going through some pre-race talks with his team. You caught sight of him from a distance, his face a mask of focus and determination. When he spotted you, he broke into a smile, and for a brief moment, the tension seemed to melt away.

You make your way over to him as he finishes up with his team.

"Ready to set the track on fire, hotshot?" you tease, playfully tugging at the sleeve of his race suit.

Oscar grins, a mix of excitement and nerves dancing in his eyes. "Well, hopefully not literally. I don't think the team would appreciate a barbecued car on my first outing."

His chuckle is tinged with a hint of nervousness. You notice his hand fidgeting with the zipper of his race suit – a telltale sign of his pre-race jitters.

"Hey," you say softly, taking his hand. "Remember what we always say? You've earned this. You belong here."

"I know. It's just...," he took a deep breath, "It's really happening, isn't it? All those years of dreaming, and now..."

"And now you're about to drive the pants off everyone out there," you finish for him, your voice filled with confidence.

As the final call for drivers echoes through the garage, you both know it's time. Oscar's eyes lock with yours, a swirl of emotions passing between you. Without a word, he pulls you close, his lips meeting yours in a tender kiss. It's brief but filled with emotion.

"For luck," you whisper as you part, your foreheads still touching.

"With you here, I've got all the luck I need," Oscar replies softly, his smile warm and genuine.

With a final squeeze of your hand, he heads to where he's needed. You watch him go, your heart racing with anticipation.

The race begins, and for the first 14 laps, everything seems to be going well. Oscar is holding his own, fighting in the midfield, showing flashes of the talent that got him here.

But on lap 15, your heart sinks as you see his car slow down, veering off the racing line. The team radio crackles with the devastating news: "Box, box. We have a steering issue. We need to retire the car."

You watch, helpless, as Oscar brings the car back to the pits. The disappointment is palpable as he climbs out, his debut cut short.

As soon as he's free from the debrief, you find him in his driver's room. His face is a mask of frustration and disappointment.

"Hey," you say softly, taking his hand. "You okay?"

Oscar sighs, squeezing your hand. "Not really. I just... I wanted to finish the race, you know? Show everyone what I could do."

You pull him into a hug. "And you will. This is just the first race, Oscar. There are plenty more to come."

July 9, 2023. British Grand Prix

Silverstone is one of the most special races in the calendar, and for Oscar it's even more special because England is his second home.

He really wanted to deliver a great result. So far, he hadn't been able to place above P8 and he desperately wanted to improve that.

"I know you're nervous about tomorrow," you said as you laid your head on his chest, feeling him tense, "But you're going to do great, baby."

Oscar wraps his arm around you, his fingers tracing gentle patterns on your shoulder. "You really think so?" he asks, his voice a mix of hope and uncertainty.

You prop yourself up on your elbow to look at him. "I know so. You've been getting stronger with every race. The car's improving, and you're more comfortable with it. Plus, this is Silverstone - you know this track like the back of your hand."

He smiles, some of the tension leaving his face. "I do love this circuit."

"That's the spirit," you say, leaning in to kiss him softly. "Now get some sleep. You've got some racing to do in the morning."

The next day you watch from the garage, your heart swells with pride as Oscar delivers a perfect drive. As he crosses the finish line in P4, the garage erupts in cheers. It's his best result in Formula 1 to date, a performance that will silence any remaining doubters.

When he finally makes it back to the garage, helmet off and face beaming, you're there waiting. He sweeps you up in a hug, both of you laughing with joy.

"You did it!" you exclaim as he sets you down. "I told you you could do it!"

Oscar's eyes are shining with elation and pride. "We did it," he corrects you. "I couldn't have done this without your support."

September 24th, 2023. Japanese Grand Prix

You're perched on the edge of your couch, eyes glued to the TV screen, your heart racing as the lights go out at Suzuka. It's killing you not to be there in person, but work commitments had made the trip to Japan impossible.

Your mind flashes back to your conversation with Oscar yesterday after qualifying. His voice had been filled with excitement and a hint of disbelief as he told you about securing second place on the grid, right behind Max Verstappen.

"Can you believe it?" he had said, his words tumbling out in a rush. "P2! Right behind Max! I mean, I knew the car felt good, but this... this is incredible!"

You had matched his enthusiasm, your pride evident in your voice. "I told you you could do it! Just imagine what you could do in the race from there."

Now, as the race unfolds, you find yourself alternating between cheering out loud and holding your breath. When he crosses the finish line in third place, you leap off the couch, screaming in joy. His first podium and in just his 14th race.

You watch the podium ceremony with tears in your eyes, your heart swelling with pride as Oscar stands there, beaming, champagne in hand next to Max and Lando. It's a moment you've both dreamed about for so long.

It was killing you not to be there.

Hours pass, and you know Oscar must be caught up in team celebrations and media obligations. You're itching to talk to him, but you don't want to interrupt. Finally, just as you're considering going to bed, your phone rings.

"Hey, podium finisher," you answer, unable to keep the smile out of your voice.

"Hey yourself," Oscar replies, and you can hear the grin in his voice. "Sorry it took so long to call. It's been absolutely crazy here."

"Don't apologize! I'm just so incredibly proud of you, Oscar. You were amazing out there. Your first podium, it's a dream come true."

There's a moment of silence, and when Oscar speaks again, his voice is thick with emotion. "I just wish you could have been here. It doesn't feel quite complete without you."

"I know," you say softly. "I wish I could have been there too. But hey, this is just the first of many podiums, right? I'll be there for the next one."

"You bet it is," Oscar chuckles, "And you better be, I need someone to help me wash all this champagne out of my hair."

You laugh, feeling a mix of joy and longing. "I love you, Oscar. Enjoy your celebrations. You've earned it."

"I love you too," he replies warmly, "And I miss you, we have some celebration on our own to do."

October 8th, 2023. Qatar Grand Prix.

The heat in Qatar is suffocating, but the excitement in the air is even more intense. You're back in the paddock, determined not to miss another milestone in Oscar's career. Yesterday's sprint shootout had been a nail-biter, with Oscar securing pole position for the sprint race by mere hundredths of a second.

As the short-format race begins, you hold your breath. Oscar gets a perfect start, maintaining his lead into the first corner. As the final lap approaches, the McLaren garage is in shambles.

When Oscar crosses the finish line in first place, the explosion of joy is deafening. You're jumping up and down, tears streaming down your face as you watch him punch the air in triumph. He's done it - his first ever Formula 1 race win.

As Oscar pulls into parc fermé, you can see the emotion on his face even through his helmet. When he finally removes it, his smile is brighter than the Qatari sun. The team swarms him, and you hang back, letting him soak in this moment with the people who've worked so hard to make this possible.

When he finally breaks free and spots you, his face lights up even more. He rushes over, sweeping you into a tight embrace.

"You did it!" you exclaim, your voice muffled against his race suit. "Your first win, Oscar! I'm so proud of you!"

Oscar pulls back, his eyes shining with. "We did it," he corrects you, just as he did after Silverstone.

You laugh, wiping away happy tears. "Well this is just the beginning. Next stop, Grand Prix victory."

May 5, 2024. Miami Grand Prix.

The air in Oscar's driver's room is heavy with disappointment. You watch as he paces back and forth, still in his race suit, his face a mixture of frustration and barely contained anger.

The race had started so promisingly - Oscar had taken the lead early on and was driving beautifully. But then, a collision forced him into an unscheduled pit stop for a new front wing, dropping him down the order and out of contention for a podium finish.

"I had it," Oscar mutters, running a hand through his sweat-dampened hair. "I was leading the race, I had the pace. If it wasn't for that idiot..."

You step closer, your heart aching for him. "I know, baby. You were driving amazingly out there."

Oscar stops pacing and looks at you, his eyes filled with disappointment. "It's not fair. We've worked so hard, the car was perfect, and then..."

He trails off, shaking his head. You close the distance between you, gently taking his hands in yours. "Hey, look at me," you say softly.

Oscar meets your gaze, and you can see the vulnerability behind his frustration.

"You're right, it's not fair," you continue. "But that's racing sometimes. What matters is how you come back from this. And you will come back from this, stronger than ever."

"I just... I wanted this so badly."

You pull him into a hug, feeling him slowly relax against you. "I know. And your time will come, Oscar. This doesn't change how talented you are or how hard you've worked. It's just a bump in the road."

May 26th, 2024. Monaco Grand Prix.

The streets of Monaco buzz with anticipation for one the most important races in the Formula 1 calendar. For Oscar, this was his second time racing in Monaco, and the excitement was palpable.

From your spot in the McLaren hospitality suite, you had the perfect view of the circuit. Oscar thought you were back home, watching from the living room, but you couldn't miss this race. You wanted to see him shine on this iconic track.

You had coordinated with the team to keep your presence a surprise. As Oscar has his last quiet moments in his driver room before the preparations started, you sent him a quick text: "Good luck, love. Drive fast, be safe. I'll be cheering you on from home!"

Oscar's response was immediate. "Thanks, babe. I miss you. Wish you were here, but I'll bring home a trophy for you."

You smiled, knowing that he was in for a big surprise.

The race began, and Oscar quickly settled into a rhythm. He defended his P2 position until the checkered flag waved.

The team erupted in cheers, and you felt tears of joy streaming down your face. It was his third podium finish, and it was in Monaco of all places.

Oscar climbed out of his car, waving to the cheering crowd, his face glowing with joy and relief. As he stood on the podium, spraying champagne and celebrating with Charles and Carlos, you made your way down to the team area.

When the podium celebrations were over, and Oscar was heading back to the garage, you waited for the perfect moment. As he turned the corner, you stepped out, catching his eye.

"Oscar!" you called out, your voice carrying over the noise of the paddock.

He froze, his eyes widening in surprise. "What are you doing here?" he exclaimed, a huge grin spreading across his face as he rushed over to you.

"I couldn't miss this. I had to see you race in Monaco," you threw your arms around him, laughing.

Oscar hugged you tightly, lifting you off your feet. "You sneaky little... I can't believe you're here!"

"Congratulations, baby. You were incredible out there," you pulled back slightly, looking into his eyes.

"This... this is amazing. Thank you for being here. It means everything to me."

"I wouldn't have missed it for the world," you replied, kissing him softly.

July 7th, 2024. British Grand Prix

Oscar had been more motivated than ever. After finishing second the previous week in Austria, he was eager to claim his first Grand Prix victory, and what better place than Silverstone.

He started strong, fighting his way to the front and eventually taking the lead. The team was buzzing with excitement; victory seemed within reach.

But then, disaster struck. A poorly timed pit stop strategy caused Oscar to lose crucial positions. Despite his best efforts, he crossed the finish line in P4. It was his best finish at Silverstone but not the victory he had hoped for.

Later that day back at Oscar's apartment you watched him pace back and forth. He finally stopped and leaned against the window, staring out into the night. His shoulders were tense, and his jaw was set in frustration. The silence was deafening.

"What's on your mind?" you asked softly, breaking the silence.

Oscar didn't turn around. "I don't want to talk about it," he muttered.

You stood up and walked over to him, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. "I know you're upset. But sometimes talking helps."

He sighed deeply and turned to face you, his eyes filled with frustration and disappointment. "I was leading the race. I could have won. My first victory, right here at Silverstone. And it slipped away because of a stupid strategy call."

You reached out and took his hand, squeezing it reassuringly. "It wasn't your fault, Oscar. You drove an amazing race. Everyone saw how talented you are."

"But it doesn't change the fact that I could have won," he said, his voice cracking with frustration. "I've been waiting for this moment my whole life, and it was right there. And now... I don't know when I'll get another chance like this."

You pulled him into a tight hug, feeling his body tense before he finally relaxed against you. "Your time will come. I know it will. You've shown everyone what you're capable of, and there will be other races, other chances. This is just one race in a long career."

Oscar pulled back slightly, looking into your eyes. "I just wanted it so badly. To win here, in front of the home crowd... it would have meant everything."

"I know," you said softly. "And you'll get there. Maybe not today, but soon. And when you do, it'll be even sweeter because of everything you've gone through to get there."

July 21, 2024. Hungary Grand Prix

The Hungaroring buzzed with excitement as the cars lined up on the grid. Oscar, starting from the front row, felt a mixture of determination and nervous energy. As the lights went out, he got a perfect start, pulling away cleanly from the pack.

Lap after lap, Oscar maintained his lead. The team's excitement grew with each passing circuit. This could be it - his first Grand Prix victory.

However, as the race progressed, pit stop strategies began to shake up the order. After a particularly well-timed stop, Lando emerged just ahead of him. The tension in the McLaren garage was palpable.

Soon, team radio crackled to life. Reminding both drivers about strategies, and particularly asking Lando to give the position to Oscar, creating tension both on and off track.

In the final laps, Lando finally relented. He moved slightly wide in a corner, allowing Oscar to slip past. Oscar crossed the finish line first, claiming his maiden Grand Prix victory.

The team erupted in cheers, but the celebration felt somewhat muted. As Oscar climbed out of his car in parc fermé, his face was hard to read.

As you watched Oscar ascend the podium, your heart swelled with pride. Despite the complicated circumstances of his win, seeing him stand on the top step, the Australian national anthem playing in his honor, was a dream come true.

The champagne spray began, and you couldn't help but smile as Oscar, Lando, and Lewis doused each other in celebration. For a moment, the tension seemed to melt away as the three drivers laughed and enjoyed the moment.

As Oscar descended from the podium, his eyes immediately sought you out in the crowd. You managed to catch him just before he was whisked away for interviews.

"Congratulations, champ," you said, pulling him into a quick embrace.

Oscar hugged you tightly, his race suit still damp with champagne. "Thank you for being here," he murmured against your ear.

You pulled back, searching his face. "How are you feeling?"

A flicker of emotion crossed his features. "I'm not sure yet. I need to process everything."

"I understand," you nodded. "Go do your interviews. We'll talk properly later."

Oscar's eyes softened. He glanced around quickly, then leaned in and gave you a quick kiss. "Love you, see you after."

Hours later, after all the media obligations and team debriefs were over, Oscar finally made his way back to the McLaren hospitality area.

As he entered the room, his eyes immediately sought you out. You were there, beaming with pride, and the sight of you seemed to melt away some of his conflicted feelings.

"There's my champion," you said softly as he approached.

Oscar's face broke into a genuine smile, the first one since he'd crossed the finish line. He pulled you into a tight embrace, burying his face in your neck.

"I did it," he murmured against your skin. "I actually did it."

You pulled back slightly to look at him, cupping his face in your hands. "You did. And I am so incredibly proud of you, Oscar."

His eyes searched yours, vulnerability evident in his gaze. "It wasn't exactly how I imagined my first win would be," he admitted.

"I know," you nodded, understanding in your voice. "But that doesn't make it any less of an achievement. You drove brilliantly today, from start to finish."

"I just wish... I wish it had been a clean fight to the end, you know?" Oscar sighed, leaning his forehead against yours, "Without the team orders and all that."

"Hey," you said, making him meet your eyes again. "This is Formula 1. It's rarely ever straightforward. What matters is that you proved yourself out there today. You're a Grand Prix winner now, and no one can take that away from you."

A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. "When did you get so wise?"

"Oh, I've always been wise. You're just finally starting to notice," you teased, earning a chuckle from him.

"Thank you," he said quietly. "For always being here, for believing in me even when things get complicated."

"Always," you promised, leaning in to kiss him softly.

The kiss deepened, both of you pouring your emotions into it - your pride and joy, his relief and love. When you finally parted, Oscar was smiling more brightly.

"So, Grand Prix winner," you grinned, "ready to go celebrate properly?"

[nottswitch]

— if you’ve been nice, you get…

────────────────── 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐫. ──

summary: your boyfriend’s return from one of the meetings with his father is always a gamble, a shot it the dark. this time, he simply needs you close.

pairing: mattheo riddle x reader

cw: 18+ smut, established relationship, fingering, oral (f receiving), p in v, unprotected sex, creampie, body worship, cockwarming, praise, cursing

wc: 1.8k

a/n: soft smut with mattheo always has a place in my heart <3 enjoy!

⟡ navigation ; m.lists ; mattheo m.list ; kinkmas 2024

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A knock on the door of your dorm in the middle of the night was not a surprise – ever since Mattheo left a few hours ago, you’d been waiting, waiting and waiting. He did tell you to get some sleep, as usual, and as usual, you didn’t listen; not that you deliberately tried to go against him, you just couldn’t sleep at all. You never could – not when he was possibly being hurt by his maniac of a father while you were comfortable in a warm but very lonely bed. So, when a quiet thump echoed through the room from the other side of the door, you felt your heart fluttering and dropping to your stomach at the same time.

Mattheo was back. But you didn’t know if he was back in one piece.

You nearly bolted out of the bed, hurrying to open the door – the last thing you wanted was making Mattheo wait. As soon as you turned the handle, he stumbled into the room, his arms wrapping tightly around you. You could almost feel the anxiety radiating off him, evident in the slight tremble of his hands caressing your back, in the shaky exhales fanning the crook of your neck, in the way his foot punched the door close behind him with way more force than needed.

“Baby,” you murmured, your own arms sliding up to embrace him as well. You felt up his back and sides, unconsciously searching for any signs of wounds or bruises, your ears tuned to hear the faintest hiss that could potentially escape his mouth. When you, thankfully, didn’t hear anything like that, you allowed yourself to pull away a bit, searching his face with a relieved yet still worried look in your eyes. “How–”

Mattheo didn’t let you finish, crashing your lips together in a kiss filled with nothing but pure desperation, as if he was trying to reassure himself that you were real, that you were physically there, in front of him, in his arms. You closed your eyes, letting him feel your presence and enjoying his, your hands soothingly moving up and down his back and shoulders. His right hand cupped your cheek as the kiss started losing its intensity, the movements of his lips mellowing out into tenderness.

“Need you close, princess. Please,” Mattheo whispered into your mouth, continuing to kiss you right after. You didn’t need words to understand him at the moment, but his pleading voice painfully tugged at your heartstrings, and you immediately understood everything he was trying to say.

“You have me, baby. I promise,” you whispered back, keeping the tremble out of your voice as best as you possibly could. Mattheo couldn’t do that, letting out a shaky breath through his parted lips. His hands moved down your body, a firm touch remembering each and every single inch of it, before he lifted you up, squeezing the back of your thighs. He carried you towards the bed, his steps urgent yet soft at the same time, gently lowering you onto the sheets.

His fingers hooked under the edge of your sleeping shirt, pulling it up to bare your skin – the contact Mattheo craved like a starved man would crave a crumb of bread after years of famine. His lips moved from yours down your jawline, latching onto your neck in a second, his tongue flicking out to taste the sweetness of it. He wasn’t leaving marks this time, like he usually did, as if he didn’t have enough strength to do it – he simply needed to know that your skin was still there, available for him to taste, that no one had taken away the privilege of being this close to you yet. His hands caressed your stomach, your waist, your chest, kneading the soft flesh of your breasts as if it was the last time he would be able to touch them. He was constantly afraid that it would be, especially right now, which made him savour each moment spent doing what he loved most in this world.

“My beautiful girl,” he whispered, lavishing your collarbones with wet, sloppy kisses. His eyes flicked up to your face for a moment, and you saw desperation still written all over his features, manifesting in the time he took to make sure not a single millimeter of you remained unloved. “The sweetest little thing in this entire fucking world.”

The trail he left all over your body, down your torso, to the waistband of your pajama pants made you shiver from anticipation. You wanted him in more ways than one, but you knew that he needed to feel all of you, which made you hold back on begging him to take you already. Although you couldn’t suppress the moans and whines that left your lips in a delightful string, the sound being angel’s music to Mattheo’s ears. He needed to hear you, to have proof that he was the one making you feel good, giving you pleasure – the only state he wanted to see you in that moment, lost in him and his touch.

Your pants were pulled down and discarded in a gentle yet somewhat hurried manner, Mattheo’s lips instantly attaching to your inner thighs. He kissed his way up, nuzzling his nose into your already dripping pussy before diving in. He had no intention to tease you right now, his aching heart screaming for him to be buried between your legs, the place he was sure he belonged in; and you were letting him, your needy sighs and pretty moans filling the quietness of the dimly lit dorm. It was all he asked for, and he got even more than that – your fingers tangled into his curls, your nails lightly scratching his head, making him moan right into you. Mattheo felt your wetness dripping down his chin and onto the silky sheets, but it didn’t matter – nothing mattered other than being completely and utterly consumed by you.

His fingers eagerly slipped into your entrance, curling and pressing into the spot he knew made you moan louder, relishing the feeling of your walls squeezing him – a sign that you were close, close to coming undone because of him.

“Need you to cum for me, sweet girl,” he murmured against your folds, his voice muffled, desperate, wanting. He felt a burning need to make you his, even though you already were, in every sense of the word – but he needed to reaffirm that.

“God, Matty, I-” Your words died down, turning into a whimper when he started pumping his fingers faster, his tongue swirling around your throbbing clit. Your release was accompanied by a tug at his hair, which nearly made him sob – he lapped everything up, slurping sounds riling you up all over again.

The path of Mattheo’s lips up your body, straight to your lips, was marked by your juices trickling out of the corners of his mouth that he made no effort to wipe away. You tasted yourself when he kissed you once more, one of your hands wrapping around his shoulders to pull him close. Mattheo pulled away the tiniest bit, just enough to take off his sweatshirt and pull down his jeans and boxers, tightly pressing against your right after. The skin-to-skin burned into both of you, your body still warm from lying in bed before he came, and his being the flaming heater it usually was.

“Please, love,” he muttered, his voice hoarse after everything he was doing just a minute ago. You felt his cock pressing between your thighs, the slight overstimulation of your sensitive pussy making them clench around his hips and lift up, searching for the friction you never had enough of. “I need you so bad.” His voice cracked at the last word as he felt your heat against him, his length twitching at the contact.

“You have me,” you whispered, reassuring him once again that you were his, and he could get what he so fiercely wanted. He took in a sharp breath as you shifted beneath him again, urging him to finally take you – and he was more than willing to show you how important you were to him, how he’d give you everything he had and then some.

Mattheo’s cock slid inside of you in a slow and gentle way, filling you up inch by inch until his crotch was firmly pressed against you. You gasped, pulling him down for another kiss, and he easily obliged, his lips moving against yours in a gentle but eager way. He started thrusting his hips back and forth, your walls squeezing him in a way that made him groan into your mouth, the satisfaction of being buried in you making its way to his brain and heart.

“Love you so fucking much, baby,” he nearly whimpered out, the air growing hot between your faces as both of you panted, the pleasure enveloping you in a warm, tingly blanket. “I can’t lose you. Ever. You hear me, sweet thing?”

“You won’t– Ah, fuck…! You won’t lose me,” you replied in an equally wanton voice, your words breaking up as the tip of his cock hit the spots that sent your mind into the kind of overdrive that chased all thoughts away, leaving the feeling of him, just him. Mattheo cupped your cheek, gazing at you with that intense affection that only he was capable of, his deeply brown eyes vulnerable, unable, unwilling to hide the entirety of his emotions, the love he felt just for you.

“Never letting you go, baby. Never in my goddamn life.”

You came together, the moment a manifestation of the connection you shared, the climax bringing you closer than ever, which was barely possible. Mattheo lowered himself onto the bed next to you, wrapping his arms around your waist and bringing you to him, his hands mindlessly tracing circles on your back. You felt his cock softening inside of you, but he made no effort to pull out, drops of his release seeping out and onto your inner thighs.

“Can I stay inside? Please?” he asked, his eyes pleading as he looked at you, searching your face for, hopefully, an agreement. “I’ll wash the sheets tomorrow, just�� please, love?”

You smiled, not entirely surprised by his request – it wasn’t the first time he needed to be as close to you as possible, which meant being inside of you in the most literal sense.

“Of course, baby,” you replied, giving him a small kiss on the lips. How could you deny him anything when he was looking at you like that?

Mattheo let out a satisfied hum and snuggled up to you, burying his face in your hair. As you dozed off, he felt his anxiety melting away just a bit – it never truly left, but at least in that moment, he could feel your warm body next to him and know that he got to love you and keep you.

[jilixthinker]

slowly to me

=͟͟͞♡ virgin!felix × noona!fem reader

=͟͟͞♡ bestfriends/roommates to lovers

word count: 7.4K

content warning: explicit sexual content, sub!felix, soft dom!noona reader, felix is a virgin, corruption kink if you squint, mutual masturbation, clit play, fingering, cock play, dirty talk, unprotected sex (as usual), creampie, they are clueless idiots in love.

a/c: i wanted to write this for the longest time and now i am kinda nervous sharing it because it feels more personal (?) and intimate than usual. hope you will enjoy it ♡

=͟͟͞♡ please, consider reblogging if you like my works!

[00:17 AM] fefe 🧚‍♀️

noona 💙

are you awake?

please tell me you are

I can't find my keys 😪

i know it's late

don't hate me

You blink your eyes open a few times. The sound of your phone buzzing on your nightstand is insistent over the chattering noise coming from your laptop. You must have fallen asleep more than 30 minutes ago, considering that you are not familiar with the episode of the anime you are currently watching. Your fingers brush against the cover of your phone and you finally grab it with a sleepy grunt. When you unlock it, not without typing the wrong code twice, you notice that your chat with Felix is already open, a few notifications popping on the screen.

[00:18 AM] fefe 🧚‍♀️

noona 😪😪

[00:18 AM] you

where are you now

[00:18 AM] fefe 🧚‍♀️

outside 😪

noona, my savior

my only light in the darkness 💙

You force yourself to sit on the bed as you yawn. When you read the last text, you chuckle despite of how sleepy you feel. It's a little bit late to be coming back home, even for Felix, but you don't mind. Felix usually stays awake till dawn, always prone to chat and watch tv series together whenever you cannot sleep. You help each other in your own ways, yours being the responsible counterpart in your household.

You find your slippers with your feet and you finally stand up, heading outside of your room and to the corridor. It's pretty warm already this time of year, and you don't even bother putting on something over your light pajamas. It's just Felix anyway, he did see you at your worst so many times that you cannot even remember.

When you open the door, Felix is fighting with the zipper of his denim jacket. He is dressed casually, almost as if he didn't put any effort on what he was going to wear. A pink hoodie is picking out from his black slacks, and his hair is styled in a messy bun, a few locks escaping from the hair tie and covering his eyes.

"Noona, I owe you." he huffs, offering you a toothy smile as soon as you let him in.

"Don't mention it. I don't even have plans for tomorrow morning, I can just sleep in." you yawn in response, plopping on the couch and closing your eyes again.

Felix hums and throws his jacket on the nearest chair of your shared living room before letting himself fall next to you, face immediately finding its favorite place into the crook of your neck.

"How was your date?" you ask him, circling his shoulders with your arm and letting him scooch closer to you.

You feel his cold nose nuzzling against your collarbones and you chuckle, bringing your hand to the top of his head and starting to untie the loose bun. Felix puffs and you can hear his lips curving into a small pout.

"As always." he mumbles. "He was cute. Funny. He paid for my order."

You nod, and your fingers find their way up to his scalp, scratching it lightly and pulling a soft grunt out of his lips. "But..." you add, waiting for the inevitable epilogue.

"But..." he shifts from his position to lay down with his face on your lap. "- I felt nothing. He was very handsome, and smart. He was nice. I could tell he would make a great boyfriend. But I just looked at him and... I couldn't see myself kissing him, or touching him. It felt like looking at a nice painting, you know? I don’t know what is wrong with me."

"Nothing is wrong with you, Lix." you murmur in the dark. Your thumb moves from his soft locks and start circling the plump skin of his cheek. Felix huffs again and rubs his nose against your lower stomach. He does it often, and it makes him look like a small kitten looking for some comfort. Your heart always sinks at that.

"I am serious." you continue. "Feelings cannot be controlled. It's not your fault if you didn't feel attracted to him. Maybe he just wasn't the one."

Felix looks at you from his position, his big pleading eyes are a little tired.

"And who will be the one, noona? I am 23 and I didn't find a single person yet. I didn't even... you know." Felix lets out a sarcastic chuckle. "Can you tell how hard is it to reach this age without experimenting with anyone? I feel left out."

"Does it bother you so much? Being a virgin?" you ask him. Felix and you are used to talk a lot about everything without any sort of embarassment, but he only mentioned the topic of his inexperience a few times in your many years of friendship.

You didn't believe him at first. Felix was... Felix. The most precious human being on earth, smart and kind, generous and funny, witty and reliable. Your bestfriend, your proclaimed soulmate, and the prettiest person you've ever seen. Him being a virgin sounded like a joke to you. He confessed it when he was 18 at the time, and he was a little tipsy after a few bottles of beers you two had shared after moving into your new apartment. You could tell it was an uncomfortable topic for him, and you never asked him again. You just told him that he was young, and that the situation would change quickly in the following months.

But years passed, five to be exact. And Felix didn't have sex with anyone. He finished college, started working and met people, he started dating even, but as soon as the people he was seeing asked him for something more, he shut everything down and disappeared from their lives.

"It does bother me, yes." he answers quietly. "Because I am not afraid of intimacy itself. I just... don't feel the right attraction. I want to, but I can't. All these pretty boys I met, and the furthest I've gone is kissing. I don't know what to do, noona."

Felix shudders and you pull him closer to you. His voice is almost a whisper and his breathing is getting a little heavy. Your fingers go back to stroke through his hair gently, as you try to calm him down.

"Have you considered dating girls?" you ask him. "You told me you felt more comfortable with them."

Felix's arms circle your waist as he hugs you tight. He looks at you intently with a shy smile. He looks so tiny all curled up like this.

"I do love girls. More than boys actually. I thought about that a lot." He murmurs as he pulls you so close that your stomach is pressed completely against his cheek. "But I feel shy around them. I cannot help but thinking that I would mess everything up. With boys... it would be easier. I know how a male body works. But I have no clue on how to, uh —"

You chuckle at his words and you lean forward to pinch at his nose, amused by his reaction. "How to touch them?" you smile at him.

Felix laughs and lets out a breathless sigh. He pulls away slightly, though keeping his eyes locked on you. You can see a light blush appearing on the apples of his cheeks.

"Uhm, yes. That." His voice is still playful, but you can hear the nervousness in his breath as well. "You know I have never kissed a girl before. Just boys. Uh–, I know nothing, noona." he exhales.

You scrunch your nose and you let yourself relax against the sofa behind you. Felix's arms are still linked tightly around your waist. "There is nothing to be ashamed of, Lix," you breathe out. "Human nature will do its thing. When you'll find yourself in that situation, your body will know what to do."

"I'm not so sure." he murmurs, starting to rub his nose against your hipbone, sniffing at the fabric like he always does when he is feeling a little overwhelmed.

Your hand finds its way toward the back of his neck and you apply a slight pressure on the skin there. Felix lets out a shaky breath.

"You will see. With the right person, you won't feel uncomfortable at all. It's normal to don't know stuff, you know. We've all been there. And each body, each person, is different. You can figure things out along the way, by asking and learning." You try to reassure him. "It's not a performance. You should just focus on feeling good and let the other person feel good too. I promise it's not so complicated as you think."

Felix hums quietly and a mellow silence falls around you. The room is still dark, it should be around 1 a.m. now, but a beam of moonlight shines through the window, reflecting small glimpses of silver upon Felix's hair.

Felix feels small and soft on your lap. He is still hugging you, and you know him enough to sense that he is restraining himself somehow. You can feel the distress in the way his tiny hands are fisting the cotton of your pajamas around your waist.

"Lixie, sweetheart..." you murmur, voice little higher than a sigh. Felix holds tighter on you, as if he is scared of you running away. As if you could.

The fact is that you love Felix. You always did, in a way. You cannot tell exactly when you fell in love with him, but it happened sometime between your last year of highschool and your freshman year of college. You remember Felix grabbing your hand when you graduated in summer, sweat under your dress from being exposed to the hot sun, waiting for your speech. You remember him intertwining your fingers and smiling at you with devoted eyes when he helped you moving in your new dormitory. You remember him wetting your shoulder with warm tears because you were going to be separated from each other for the first time. And, oh. At a certain point you just knew.

You never talked about that, of course. You didn't think you needed to. Things between you were perfect already, and you were happy you've managed to slip neatly into your routine. Felix needs you in a way nobody else can comprehend. And you need him too, in a slight different way. And it's okay, you've always been good at managing your own feelings.

"Noona..." he answers timidly.

"What are you thinking about? I can hear the sound of your brain working no stop." you shrug, looking at him. The moonlight looks the ideal light to admire him, you find yourself admitting.

Felix looks over at you, his lips upturned with a reluctant smile. "It's just... I don't think I will ever find this person." he sighs softly.

"Why so? I cannot imagine anyone who wouldn't want to be with you. You are perfect." you say, eyes jumping down to Felix's delicate frame. His button nose covered in freckles scrunches a bit over the line of his plump lips. They look moist. They must be soft.

From his gaze, you can see that your words are the last thing Felix was expecting to hear from you. "Because–" he stutters while the pressure of his hands on you becomes almost too much, "–there is already... ugh, nevermind."

The silence that follows his semi-confession is heavy on you. You freeze at the admission, and you can tell from his eyes that he didn't mean to let that slip. That's it – you think – there is someone. Someone who Felix cares about, maybe that he even loves, and that is keeping him from living his life freely. Someone who apparently doesn’t reciprocate his feelings, given that Felix is trying to see other people and complaining about them with you.

Fuck, that hurts. You could have seen it coming, but it still hurts.

You open your mouth to formulate any sort of coherent words of encouragement that you can master, but Felix decides to move from his position at the same time you shift on the sofa to look at him. The impact of your bodies gives gravity a push, and you both go down with a loud humph, landing on the couch with your limbs all entangled. Felix groans as his back collides with the leather, and you open your eyes to check up on him, only to stop as soon as you realize how close you are to each other.

His lean and warm body is all pressed up against the cushions, and suddenly any trace of stoicism has fled the situation. You don't even remember what you were going to say, to be honest. All you are conscious of is Felix's body and the way his eyes are looking at you, making you flush with an unknown tenderness. You take a deep breath and the realization that you can feel his parted thighs caging your hips and his arms pawing at your shirt hits you hard. And maybe it's the late hour, maybe it's because you've spent the last hour talking your hearts out – and the last years repressing your feelings –, or maybe it's because Felix looks so vulnerable like this.

Whatever it is, instead of laughing everything off and move from this awkward position, you keep looking at him as some strands of hair fall onto his forehead and his breathing gets a little quicker. You find yourself thinking that maybe this is the most beautiful Felix has ever looked.

"Noona." he murmurs, and you can feel how the air shifts around you. His make-up is a little bit smudged around his eyes, you notice, and you lift your hand to rub at the corner of his eyelid with your finger. Felix trembles lightly as you touch him, and desire tugs at you, pushing you towards a path that you know is not wise.

"Noona–" he breathes out again, this time not much louder than a whisper. "I want to try something."

"Felix," you say unsteadily as Felix's hand grabs at your pajamas a little more firmly. "This isn't a good idea."

"Why so?" he asks, voice all tiny, shifting closer to you anyway. Everytime you try to look away from his lips it's like your eyes have been glued in place. "You said that with the right person it wouldn't feel uncomfortable. I– you.. I don't feel uncomfortable with you."

You sigh at his words. You are sure there is almost a thousand reasons why you shouldn't be doing this. First of all, Felix doesn’t love you. Not the way you do, at least. And he is hurting now, he is sad. He is not in the conditions of taking such a decision. But you can hardly manage a coherent thought right now, with him being this close to you.

He doesn't like you back, you cannot do this.

"Felix, I am honored that you trust me this much. I really am." you manage, but your voice sounds faint. "But this is not the right thing to do now. You don't want it to happen this way."

At that, Felix pauses and looks at you. He bites his lip, as if he was looking for the right words, and his eyes looks different, almost watery. "Don't you..." he stutters, "am I not good enough?"

You blink in confusion and a thick layer of guilt fills your stomach to the brim. You hate seeing Felix in distress, you cannot stand the way his timid smile leaves his face. You would give him the moon if that would make him happy.

"Oh no, Felix, sweetheart," you confess, bringing your hand to cup his cheek. The freckled skin feels soft and warm under your fingers. "this is not what I meant. I just– fuck," you swear in protest. "I just don't think I am the right choice. You deserve the right person for this."

Felix’s gaze fractures and he suddenly lets out the tiniest sigh, a pleading look framing his delicate traits. He turns his face to the left, leaning on your touch and he rubs his nose on the palm of your hand.

"Noona, you are not the right person. You are my person." He shyly admits, voice muffled on your skin. "But I can understand if you don't want this. If you don't want me the way I do. I am sorry for bringing this out, I should have kept that for myself."

You freeze, guilt becoming dread and pooling on your stomach. Oblivious to any of this, Felix gives you a small, sad smile and continues, "I tried to ignore it, believe me, I did. I kept myself from feeling this much because I knew it wasn't the same for you. But I can't help it, noona. I started seeing other people in the hope that it would eventually fade away. But it didn't. And now I am making a fool out of myself." Felix looks over at you and his smile is not the one you are used to see on his face. "Sorry for ruining everything," he sighs, "I just love you."

Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no.

You feel a fist of air being pushed out of your lungs like a truck. Felix's eyes are big and sweet, and a single tear escapes from his lashes to roll down the apple of his cheek. You fucked up. You fucked up so bad. You misunderstood everything. Guilt nestles in your chest like a stone, scraping at your heart.

"Felix," you say, your voice sounding foreign and groggy, "Felix. You love me? You love me?"

Felix's eyes jump down to your lips just for a second, and then back at you. He sniffs as he brings his free hand to his face, rubbing the tear away. "I do." he admits. "I really do."

The truth in his tone has you let out an inaudible gasp. Then, in the span of a second, just the time of a blink, everything changes.

"Say it again." You whisper as your eyes lock into Felix's. And then Felix opens his mouth, just barely, and his muttered words stay still on the tip of his tongue.

"Say it." You repeat as your thumb shifts, stroking slowly along his jaw and down to his chin. "Wanna hear it again."

Felix blinks, and he looks like he can't come up with something to say at all. "Noona, what are you, uh–" he gasps when your fingers catch his bottom lip, pinching it a little to enjoy its softness.

"Lix, sweetheart..." you whisper, letting your face fall slowly down to his neck. The insides of your tighs press against the outside of Felix's as to trap him there. "You want me, uh? You love me?" you tease him, your hand coming up to steady him by the chin, keeping him still while your mouth finally founds the tender skin of his neck and you place a single peck under his earlobe. "I wanna hear you saying it."

A weak whimper makes itself known at the bottom of Felix's throat when you angle your head to the side and leave a humid trail of kisses all along the column of his neck. "Noona, I... why are you – ah – why are you doing t-this?" he mutters with a sigh.

You grin against his skin at the sound of his affected voice, and you nose at his chin blowing another tiny peck there. "Just say it." You repeat.

Felix's eyes are semiclosed now, but his pupils are wide and dark, and your grip on his jaw tightens a bit. Just another wet kiss on his Adam's apple is sufficient to convince him to give you what you're asking for. "I want you." He grumbles as his legs start to tremble under your weight. "I love you." He breathes.

And that's it. Felix doesn’t have the time to even realize what is going on before you are pressing down with purpose, your lips firm against his and your hands buried in his hair as he lets out a tiny sob. His mouth is cherry red and sweet, and your lips slid against it, applying just the right amount of pressure to have him melting against the couch. The kiss feels almost electric, and the low groan Felix exhales bubbles up into the back of your throat.

Felix is soft, and his body becomes malleable and pliant beneath your touch as soon as he clings onto you with fervent hands, a little desperate to keep hold of how good he is feeling. He moans beautifully every time your lips detach from his to catch some breath, and his fingers find your face too, curling against your cheeks and keeping you close to him.

As soon as your tongue licks languidly at his bottom lip, his mouth opens up to let the warm muscle slip into his mouth with a low grunt. You can feel that Felix is not experienced in the way he is unable to do anything but tremble with pleasure in the bracket of your arms as your lips glide against his, slick and wet. He lets out another whimper when your tongue licks at the roof of his mouth and your head feels dizzy and heavy with desire.

You cannot remember the last time you felt this good and this right, to be honest. Felix’s confession is still lingering in your brain as your hips press against his in a swift movement, coaxing a soft moan out of the boy under you. You smile in the kiss, feeling as if everything in the universe is finally in its designed place and, at the same time, all condensed in the way the two of you are wrapped up in each other so tightly that you can’t keep track of where one of you starts and ends.

Reluctanly, you force yourself to separate from Felix's tender mouth just a few millimiters. "Lix, baby," you whisper lovingly on his lips. "You have no idea how long I wanted to do this."

"Y-you wanted this?" he pants, parting his legs more and allowing you to slot your body inbetween of them. His breath is sticky and hot and you feel yourself getting restless on top of him.

"Sweetheart. You have no idea how much I love you. How much I want you." You confess.

"But... but you've never–" he stutters under your gaze. "Oh God, don't tell me we've been this stupid!"

You chuckle and nod slowly. "Apparently, yes, we have been." You smile, and your chest is so full of fondness and love that it's hard to breathe. "And we wasted a lot of time. But at least we're here now."

Felix nods timidly and you lean in again, this time just kissing and nipping at the sensitive skin under his chin. You move closer to Felix's ear and then back towards his jaw. He starts to breathe harder, hands clutching the shirt of your pajamas, and his thumb brushes against the hardened nub of your nipple, making you hiss quietly.

Felix moans when you start licking at his lips again.

"Good?" you ask, smiling against his skin.

Felix nods. "Yeah. Y-you can keep going."

You comply, because you could never deny anything to him. You softly suck his upper lip between your teeth and let it go with a loud pop. Then you move to his neck again, and you bite him carefully a few times until Felix starts to squirm beneath you. The thought that you are the first person, the first woman, doing this to him has heat rushing to your face and you wonders if Felix wants to do more, or if he wants to keep things over the clothes. You are okay waiting. You've waited for years.

"Can I… can I ask you something?" he stutters when your hands find his hips and you start caressing them in tiny circles.

"Of course, Lix. You can ask me anything." you reassure him, rising your head from the crook of his neck and looking at him fondly.

"You know what we were talking about before," he breathes shyly, eyes big and teary. "I wasn't able to do anything with all the people I dated because... they were not you," he admits. "and – uh, I don't know how to say this. It's embarassing."

Felix sighs as he tries to hide his face behind his hands, but you stop him by grabbing his wrists.

"Do you want to try? Now?" you ask calmly, ignoring the burning lava that is flooding into your veins at the thought of having Felix like that, just for you.

Felix nods again, all soft and timid. "I wanna try. With you." He mutters as his hips buck involuntarily against yours for the first time. And that's when you notice that Felix is hard under you, cock stirring to life when you grind down into him as a response to his movement. "B-but I don't know anything, noona. You have to show me."

You hover your face over Felix's for a moment, searching something into his eyes before diving in again for a kiss. Felix hums languidly against you and you pull his tongue into your mouth, sucking on it before letting it go slowly, teeth dragging. Felix groans deep in his chest and you can feel the vibrations go straight to your pussy. Then the realization that you are finally doing it hits you.

You. And Felix.

I need to stay focused, you think when you start feeling your head becoming too clouded with desire. Felix feels so tender and warm against you, and it's difficult to concentrate when your arousal begins to pool in your panties, just a few layers of fabric separating your core from Felix's poor neglected cock. The kisses get sloppier but Felix doesn’t seem to mind, and you quickly find a rhythm between the movements of your lips and the gentle rocking of your body against his.

"What do you want to do, sweetheart? You can tell me." You hum as your mouth latches again onto the spot between Felix's neck and shoulder, sucking and then soothing the skin with your tongue.

"Ah, fuck…" Felix curses when your hand finally trails down his chest and lightly grazes his cock from over his pants. He feels sensitive and overwhelmed in the best way possible, and he feels like he is losing his mind already. "W-want to touch you, noona, please. Please, I've been wanting to touch you forever."

A tiny moan escapes from your parted lips at Felix's confession and you are pretty sure that your panties are now ruined for good. You can feel the hot stickiness gluing them to your entrance.

"Okay, baby." You sigh, shifting your weight in order to lift your hips a little from Felix's body. "You can touch me. I'll show you how. Is that what you want?"

Felix pants and his fists close again on your shirt as if he's trying to steady himself. "Y-yes please. Show me." He answers, and he looks completely blissed out, hair as a messy crown around his beautiful face.

"Okay." You concede, gathering all of your weight on your right arm to pull down both your pajamas shorts and underwear with just one quick motion, air finally hitting pungently the heath of your pussy.

Felix gulps and you see his Adam's apple bobbing deliciously as he stares at the way a sticky string of slick is connecting your entrance to the cotton of your panties. You feel your core pulsing at the sight and you let the garnments fall on the ground, climbing back to Felix's body and straddling his lap.

Felix looks up to you, but his eyes keep flicking back between your face and the mound of your pussy, and you try to thrust gently against the hard fabric of his jeans, just over his hardened erection. When you rock your hips tentatively on his bulge, your clit gets caught on the cold metal of his belt, making you hiss. Your pussy throbs, releasing a gush of arousal over where Felix's cockhead should be.

"Lixie, baby." You breathe out. "Noona needs your hand for this."

Felix cheeks are as red as cherries and he hiccups at your request, nodding twice and pliantly offering you his right hand. He places it just near your thigh, not daring to get any closer to your heath without any given permission.

You smile softly at him and you wrap your thumb and index around his wrist, bringing his palm to the front of your pussy and letting it brush against the hood of your clit for just a second. "I guess you watched porn before, uh, baby?" you ask him grinding gently on his hand. "I think you know a bit about female anatomy already."

Felix sighs and a wanton moan rises from his throat when he feels your engorged clit bumping against his skin. "Y-yes, I have." He blushes.

You laugh breathily at his shyness and you let his hand slide past your front to eventually press on your labia, guiding his slim fingers to spread the wetness gushing from your hole.

"Usually I prefer to be stimulated here," you say, nudging the pad of his thumb against your sensitive bud. "In little circles." and you move your hand in tandem with him, circling your clit and trembling a little from his insecure touch. Another spurt of arousal drips from your pussy and coaxes Felix's fingers, making him moan.

"But now I want it inside." Your voice is sickengly sweet, and Felix looks like he is one step away from hyperventilating. His teeth dig on his bottom lip and he sighs in pleasure.

"Please," he whines. "Please, let me."

You roll your hips so that the tips of his fingers catch your entrance, and suddenly you sink down in just one motion. His middle and ring finger meet you halfway, and he watches your face in adoration as the two digits push into you. You let out a small whimper when his palm finds your mound again, and you finally sit on him fully.

"Ah – noona. G-god." He keens as he feels his fingers being wrapped up with your warmth.

You lift up from him, desperate for some friction, your hand still grabbing his wrist to guide him and help him. "Baby, fuck, finally." You grunt as your hips swing forward and back to create a sort of rhythm. "Wanted you like this for the longest time, you have no idea."

Felix mewls as he hears the squelching sound of his hand against your throbbing cunt. The schlick schlick is filthy and loud, and his head starts spinning. "Noona, you are so soft, so warm. Fuck, why are you so wet?" He cries, eyes big and round and locked at the way your pussy is engulfing a part of himself.

The drag of his fingers makes your head floaty and you grind further down onto his knuckles, the stretch making you want more and more.

"That's how it's supposed to be with a woman, sweetheart. We are programmed to take." You chuckle breathily as you slowly but steadily fuck yourself onto Felix's fingers. "But you are too, right? My sweet boy. You are just taking what I am giving to you, isn't it?"

Felix moans and his pads involuntarily curl upwards, brushing against your gummy spot as his head falls back, deep groans tumbling out of his parted lips. "Ah – too wet noona, too wet. I wanna, w-wanna..."

"What? What do you want, baby? Tell me, I wanna hear." You sound rightfully out of breath while you fuck mercilessly Felix's digits and you flood his hand with your juices. You shift forward to kiss him on the mouth and his palm finds your clit again, sending jolts of pleasure through your spine.

"Wanna... w-wanna be with you. Please, noona, I've waited. I need – oh, God – I need you fully. I l-love you so much, I always wanted it to be with you." He sighs against your mouth before you can slot your lips together and lace your tongue on his, sucking the wet muscle slowly until Felix is reduced as a squirming mess under you.

"Oh my sweet boy, my angel," you praise him as you try to slow down your movements. If you keep going with this pace you will cum too soon, and you want to finish together with Felix for your first time.

Felix follows your mouth and with his free hand he timidly brushes your left breast, staring at the way it bounces with every thrust of your hips on his hand. It looks mesmerized by the way your body moves and gets wet over him, preparing itself to welcome him inside even if he doesn't properly know what to do.

With a low grunt, you force yourself to stop your thrusts and you peck Felix on his tumid, soft lips. His hand falls uselessly on his hip while you balance your body on his waist to finally get rid of your last piece of clothing, throwing the filmsy shirt of your pajamas away.

Felix looks at your naked body as he if he was admiring a painting and, despite of your confidence, you find yourself blushing a little under his devoted gaze. You dreamt about this moment so much, pondering that it would never come, and now it feels almost surreal to have Felix all for you as you always wanted.

"I love you, Felix." You whisper lovingly, a tear stuck on the corner of your eye. "I love you so much."

And Felix beams. His eyes, watery with pleasure, lit up and bring a smile to his beautiful face, the face that you wished you could caress and claim as yours for so many years. "I am yours, noona. Please, make me yours." He murmurs softly.

You kiss him again, and it's hungrier this time, even more than the kisses you already shared. And then the kissing melts into licking, and then into biting, until Felix's hand finds your waist and then falls to cup your ass.

"I need you out of these clothes in 10 seconds." You mutter with a breathy sound, and Felix is fervent to obey, quickly getting rid of his pants and underwear and throwing his pink hoodie away, far from you.

When you crawl back into his lap, Felix is sitting on the couch. You find your place on his legs, straddling him until you are face to face and you can hear the sweet sound of his erratic breathing against your ear.

"I want to do it like this." You breathe out, gently nipping at his lips and then placing a small kiss at the corner of his mouth. "Wanna see you."

Felix sighs and his aching cock, now finally free from the constriction of his pants, throbs against your lower belly, spurting a gush of precum which dribbles into your navel. "I can't believe this is really happening." He hiccups, pleasure making his head feel dizzy.

You smile fondly. "Me neither." And you bring your hand down, resting your hot palm over his shaft and giving pressure until you are dragging the skin of his cock up and down. Felix melts with a breathy mewl.

Felix has a perfect cock, you think, and then you say it out loud. "You have a perfect cock, baby."

Felix gasps and he throws his head back, hitting the cushion of the couch. You can see that his face is flushed with arousal and embarassment, and that makes you feel lightheaded.

"So perfect," you continue, playing with your fingers and bringing your thumb to the engorged tip, smearing the thick droplets of precum all along his aching muscle until you graze his balls. "Perfect size, perfect girth, perfect color. You know how pretty your cock is, baby? Not too long, but chubby. I love it."

"Noona," Felix sighs painfully, thighs parting under your weight to give you more space. He looks fucked up, and you barely touched him.

"I want to play with it forever," you say, picking up your pace and jerking him fully. "And I will do it. I will touch this sweet cock all day long, making it cum so many times, making it feel so so so good."

"Please, please, please." Felix keens and throbs again on your hand, now hard as a rock and trying to stay as still as he can.

"It looks so tasty, too. Wanna slurp it in one bite." You whisper as you swirl your index on the slit of his cockhead and Felix lets out the sweetest groan you could imagine. It's so easy to pleasure him, and he responds to you so well.

"But not now," you reassure him. "Now I need you inside of me. Need you as deep as you can. Need you to be mine."

Felix forces his eyes open and his hands grip into the underside of your thighs, bringing you closer to him. You cross your arms behind his neck, slotting your lips together once again because you just can't get enough of Felix's breathy moans as you bring him to the edge with you.

"Noona, I don't, ah– I don't have a condom." He urges to tell you when you circle your hips against him and his tip catches the entrance of your pussy.

"We don't need a condom. I am on the pill, and I am clean." You pull away to mouth at Felix's neck, and you suck at the column until you are gliding your mouth over his Adam's apple. "And you are too, obviously. Don't worry about that, sweetheart. I need to feel you all hard and raw inside of me."

You kiss Felix again, breaths coming out in restless wisps, hips frantic. "Can you take it?" you ask against his lips, your right hand gripping Felix's wet cock. Felix nods, gulping loudly. With your arm reached behind you and your head dipped forward, you slap the tip against your cunt, eyes never leaving his face.

Felix swallows, and you can feel his heart racing as you nudge his cockhead against your heath, pussy clenching and unclenching for pleasure. You look at him in the eyes for one last time, and then you sink.

When Felix's tip breeches, you whimper at the stretch with you head lolled to the side. You push your hips down, taking Felix's chubby cock slowly until you’re seated on it. And, with his cock fully inside, Felix groans and tears finally spill from his eyes, wetting his cheeks and rolling down to his chin.

"Ah– oh, God, please! P-ple eh e-ease." He cries as he grips your hips so tight that he is gonna leave marks.

"Easy, baby. Easy." You pant, eyes rolling on your skull at the way the head of his cock presses perfectly on your spongy spot. Felix's tongue lolls out from his mouth, and you take the tip between your lips, suckling lightly on it before lifting your hips up and then slamming back again.

"It's too tight, too tight, too w-wet," Felix sobs, a dribble of saliva forming a tiny bubble at the top of his upper lip. You lower your head to look at the way you are taking Felix to the brim, his swollen balls resting on the curve of your ass, and you let out a lewd sound at the view.

But it's not enough, because this is Felix's first time, and you just know from the way he is trembling that he is not gonna last long, the poor angel he is. You played with him a bit too long considering his inexperience, and now you can feel him twitching inside of you, bringing you close as well with just a few pumps.

"I know, baby, I know. You feel so fucking good too. You fill me so well, look." And you take one of the hands that are gripping your hips, making it slide against your pussy to let him feel the point were you two are connected.

Felix grasps the base of his cock with his wrist and he tries to push it even deeper inside of your wet heath with a loud groan. "It's so, s-so good." He repeats mindlessly.

You gather all of your strength, gripping into Felix's shoulders in front of you and letting you knees carry your weight as you finally begin to ride his cock. You raise your ass up just to feel the tip catch at your rim only to force back down, fast and hard.

"Noona, ah– noona!" Felix grunts out, "F-fuck, I can't, I c-can't!"

At a particularly deep thrust, Felix cries out again, a slew of filthy words and many slurred versions of your name coming out of his red, juicy lips.

"Baby, Felix, baby." You moan, letting yourself fall against his chest and beginning to move your hips in circles. You feel his cock hitting deliciously at your cervix and your clit rubbing on Felix's hip bone.

"I lo-oh-ove you." Unable to help it, Felix begins to thrust up quickly, grinding his cock inside of you and smashing his warm cheek against your shoulder, as you involuntarily squeeze your walls around his shaft.

You are trying to make this last a little bit more, but a tight coil of pleasure starts to form in your lower belly, and Felix's heavy and raspy whines tell you that he is in your same conditions. "Feels so good, sweetheart. So thick and hot, you are making me cum, ah– so quick." You blabber, head feeling floaty. "Are you close too? Tell me you are close. Wanna come with you."

Felix hiccups and his thrusts become messy and erratic, cock leaking inside of you as you clench around him. "Close, close, s-so close." He picks you up by your thighs to throw you onto his cock as if you were weightless. "Can I, ah a-ahhh, w-where can I–?" he sobs out with every thrust.

"Inside, Lix, my love. Cum inside," you praise him. "So good to me. So good." And you whine as Felix fucks desperately into you, a thick layer of sweat on his freckled skin.

Two more pushes are what it takes to have your pussy clenching hard and tight around Felix, and as your clit rubs one last time against his pubic bone, your eyes roll backwards and you cum with a filthy long moan, flooding Felix's cock with your juices.

As the orgasm hits you, you smash your lips against Felix's and suffocate your whines on his mouth. As soon as Felix feels you pulsing around his drooly cock, you see him going cross-eyed. Then, he pushes almost violently into your heath and comes with one final, deep smash of his cock, filling you up.

Voice hoarse with pleasure and a little out of breath, Felix moans softly, face finding its comforting place in the crook of your neck. "I love you." he whispers.

You both stay silent for a couple of minutes, and you loll your head to the side to huff warm breaths that tickle Felix's temples.

"How do you feel?" You asks, bringing your fingers to slowly pet Felix's damp hair. You tongue feels heavy inside your mouth, and your legs muscles sting. But you are happy.

"I feel like I waited for this moment for my entire life." Felix's words are slow and shy, despite of what just happened between the two of you. You can feel him chuckling against your shoulder. "I still have to process what is going on."

"We have time." You murmur, kissing his forehead and hugging him lovingly, keeping him safe in your arms. "Now we have all the time in the world."

Felix smiles. The room is not dark anymore.

©️ jilixthinker, 2024. please do not copy, translate, or republish my works anywhere.

[holysmokesblog]

Could it be real?

Vander x reader

Words: 0.5k

Warnings: -

Summary: You must face a fact that seems impossible, but it’s right there before your eyes—it’s just a matter of believing it.

Note: It's been over two years since the last time I posted something here. I hope you enjoy this piece, and that the translation is correct since I'm not very good at English. <3

He was there, just a few meters away, but he didn’t seem like himself. He didn’t look like him, didn’t sound like him, and didn’t even smell the same. He was simply unrecognizable.

Vi’s heavy hand rested on your shoulder, pulling you out of your thoughts. You looked at her, searching for answers, but she only stared at the massive creature lying on the ground.

“Are you sure it’s…”

“Completely.” Vi didn’t let you finish your question. She released your shoulder and approached the giant, who lay asleep a few meters away. She gently touched its back. The beast stirred uncomfortably, but upon seeing the young woman, it relaxed. “I have no doubt.”

You stepped closer, slowly, afraid your approach might alert the massive being, but it kept its back turned.

“Just look at him, and you’ll understand.”

The creature hunched over, trying to appear smaller (an impossible feat), and took a cautious step forward. You stepped back, which made him freeze in place.

Finally, the immense creature turned, and you saw him. He wasn’t how you remembered. He didn’t look like the man you’d fallen in love with in the Lanes, the one you’d shared most of your life with, built a family with. But without a doubt, it was him.

“Vander?”

Your mind raced, struggling to comprehend everything that was happening—how your husband, the man who had died years ago, was now back in a body that wasn’t his own.

You remained silent, unable to respond. Your brain kept trying to process everything, but no answer came. Vi, still enraged, was about to say something else when a loud snort stopped her.

Seeing that you wouldn’t come closer, Vi stepped in again.

“I know he looks different, but I swear, this is Vander. He remembers us.”

“How is this possible?”

“We’re not sure, but you have to trust me.”

“I searched for his body for months. I didn’t… I didn’t find anything—”

“That doesn’t matter anymore!” Vi snapped, furious. “He’s here now. We can help him; we can bring Vander back! How can you not be happy?”

The massive creature that had once been your husband took another step in your direction, but this time, you didn’t back away, so he kept advancing. Panic gripped your chest with every step he took, the fear that touching him would wake you up in your apartment, drenched in tears.

When he finally reached you, he lifted one of his enormous hands and gently brushed your cheek, wiping away the tears that had begun to stream uncontrollably.

“Is this real?” You looked into his eyes. “Please,” you begged. “I don’t want to wake up.”

Vander didn’t dare touch you again, fearing you might run away, but you couldn’t stand it any longer. You buried yourself in his chest. He hesitated for a moment but finally wrapped one massive arm around you, lowering his face to your head and inhaling deeply.

“You’re real,” you murmured through your sobs, unable to believe it.

“I’m here,” he said in a deep voice, squeezing you gently with the arm that held you close.