#i really want to reach out to dan and get him to come visit me maybe even take me away on an adventure but what if he says no…

[groupwest]

sorry can’t go out today trapped in the invisible coffin of my own making yes it will be all week i’m sorry

[neuvistar]

Biker! Dan heng, Sunday and aventurine?

Sfw and NSFW

Like I'm brain dead for them

DREAM RIDE. biker! honkai star rail men part one

— featuring ┊aventurine, sunday, (il) dan heng x fem!reader (all separate)

— warnings / content warnings ┊all consensual! sfw + nsfw, feminine terms used (she, girl, etc), cunniligus (aventurine #1 pussy eater strikes again), orgasm denial (sunday), jus a tad bit of subby dan heng, semi-public s3x? (sunday), blowjob (dan heng), use of vibrators (sunday), riding (dan heng) use of nicknames, multiple orgasms, bath s3x (aventurine), sunday is a MENACE here, reader implied 2 be a lil smaller than them, v4ginal fingering (aventurine), more tba! | 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT.

— a/n ┊NOT PROOFREAD ! might correct tmr if i’m not sleepy! <3 anyways hi guys writers block stopped biting my ass anyways guys i’m SOOO attracted 2 aventurine it’s acc insane he needs to be jailed from how majestic he is.. erm! whoever keeps sending asks abt biker! hsr men god bless u and ur entire family | reblogs r appreciated

⊹ 𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐄

sfw.

⊹ BIKER!AVENTURINE who would take you out for late night rides! he’s a total drama queen, let’s get that out of the way. he loves you, yes, but he’d get so pouty whenever you turn him down for your daily night rides with him, he sulks and sulks.. clinging onto your figure until you finally say yes! jokes aside, aventurine really does enjoy your company, he really does value quality time as he would go as far to even take you out to see the stars, feel the breeze and have some fresh air, or just have a midnight snack!

“come on, baby.. 2am is nothing! just come and ride with me for a bit, i promise i’ll have you back til 3?”

⊹ BIKER!AVENTURINE who always finds himself buying you gifts before visiting you and such! sometimes he’d just be riding around on the road and all of the sudden his hands are full of bags and gifts just for you before he gets to your place! he’s a huge gift giver, spoiling you to the brim.

“would [name] like this one.. no no, maybe this one. hm.. maybe both.”

⊹ BIKER!AVENTURINE who can be insecure at times, sometimes he thinks about whether he’s truly right for you or not. like, usually he wouldn’t give in to these thoughts but there are times where he’s just riding around at night n he suddenly stops n goes.. “what if [name] is bored of me?” even though he might not show it, poor thing needs A LOT and i mean A LOT of reassurance from you, please tell him he’s good enough for you!

“my darling.. are you sure i’m right for you? i mean, you know. i’ve just been.. thinking. you’re not gonna leave, are you.. hm? ‘gonna stay with me, right?”

nsfw.

⊹ BIKER!AVENTURINE absolutely loves having sex while you both take bubble baths, i mean.. it’s essential to have good hygiene, isn’t it? aventurine pumped his fingers within your pussy, circling his thumb over your clit as he licked his lips, nuzzling close against your neck. “mmh.. you like that?” his voice, husky and low as his fingers reached the deepest parts of your cunt, a sharp gasp caught in your throat as he held you firmly against him. watching you struggle to stifle your moans made him feel a combination of pride and surprise. aventurine gripped your waist lightly, offering support and reassurance. "damn, sweetheart.. are my fingers that good?" he murmured, his voice low and steady.

aventurine growled softly, pleasure coursing through him at your reaction. his fingers deeply thrusted in and out of you, feeling your tight walls spasm around his digits. with a lick of his lips, he added another finger within your drenched pussy.. the sound of water splashing against his fingers, his speed rising more and more.. stretching you delicately. "missed this," he groaned, adding more speed to his rhythm. "missed the way your body responds to me, my darling girl..” his eyes locked onto yours, seeing the desire mirrored back at him. he wanted to make you cum, that was his goal for the night.. to hear you scream his name again. the roughness of his fingers grew, the sounds of water splashing against his hand was enough to embarrass you, aeons.. he was going fast alright. “c’mon, sweetheart.. it’s been ages since i made you squirt. mmh.. these fingers are good enough to make you squirt, right?”

⊹ BIKER!AVENTURINE who would eat you out almost all the time, whether it’s on his motorcycle seat while he holds your body, or maybe his table filled with tools, or just a plain old bed. aventurine is willing to eat you out literally anywhere, his tongue piercing made it even better. aventurine savoured every second of this, allowing his senses to be consumed by your intoxicating flavour. your body trembled above him, carefully laid on the seat of his motorcycle as he chuckled against your pussy.. your hands buried in his hair as he delved deeper into your depths. the blonde’s tongue danced expertly, exploring every hidden crevice while his fingers played with your swollen bud. “you taste divine," he murmured against your sex, causing you to arch your back sharply. "just like the finest wine, only better." his words hung heavy in the air between them, fuelling your rising passion.

aventurine attacked your cunt hungrily, devouring your folds with complete vigor. aeons, he was obsessed with your pussy, and your taste. the way your wetness spilled out onto his tongue, mixing with the warm atmosphere surrounding the both of you drove him crazy. his large hands held you firmly against the seat of his motorcycle, hands roamed freely over your body, tweaking one of your nipples roughly while diving deeper inside your drenched pussy. your boyfriend groaned into your folds, feeling your walls tremble around him. “good darling.. such a good girl taking my tongue so well.” “.. ‘turine.. you’re gonna make me fall on here.. j—just eat me out on the desk..” you murmured, wincing when you felt a slap on your pussy. “whoops, sorry angel,” ugh.. this tease. “mm.. no-can-do, sweetheart. i like seeing you like this. just imagine, my cum leaking out of your pussy and right onto my bike.” he licked a single stripe on your cunt, chuckling when he noticed your legs quivering. “oh how fascinating would that be.”

⊹ 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐘

sfw.

⊹ BIKER!SUNDAY who has a habit of grabbing onto your waist, or just snaking his arm around it! i mean, he does this for many reasons.. one, to show you’re taken, and two, mm.. he just feels like it! sunday would do it on random occasions, whether he’s talking with his biker friends, at the cashier, anywhere! he loves grabbing your waist and he makes that very clear, maybe if he’s in the mood.. he’d slide his hand beneath your shirt as well wink wink

sunday glanced at your form, a small smile forming on his face when he saw you examining your surroundings. he snaked an arm around your waist, pulling your body firmly against his.

⊹ BIKER!SUNDAY who’s jealousy is intense. sunday would get angry at you, give you the silent treatment, or just bluntly ignore you if you were found talking and laughing with another guy other than him. he refuses to believe that you can be happy with other guys other than him. he would glare at other people he catches staring at what’s his, he was.. possessive. and whenever you catch sight of it, he would try and manipulate you to thinking he’s doing it for your own good! because all those men that were staring at you were bad! (wow, he’s a bastard) saying this, he’s a huge manipulator.. it can be a handful dating him.

“trust me, my love. can’t you see how those men were staring at you?” his voice was soft, dangerously soft. the malicious glint in his eyes didn’t hide anything. “they’re after you, angel. they’re after what’s mine. i’m only trying to protect you. why are you so doubtful of me, hm? do you not love me anymore? are you perhaps.. bored of me?”

⊹ BIKER!SUNDAY who loves being in control, this can be taken in a sexual or non sexual sense <3 sunday is assertive, and he knows what’s right for you. (most of the time!) he can be a bit controlling at times, but he means no harm! he just wants to keep you safe, promise! sometimes sunday would give you that look whenever you would try n defy him, he means business.. trust me. because of this, he can be cold and stubborn towards you at times without even knowing, geez.. he really needs to work on that.

nsfw.

⊹ BIKER!SUNDAY loves being in control, as i’ve mentioned.. but especially in bed. besides that, he’s so damn mean.. he doesn’t let you cum unless he tells you to, kissing your tears away with his lips. “ah ah ah, darling.. what did i say about cumming?” his eyes devoured your small frame, taking in every curve and angle of your body. sunday couldn't help but feel a surge of dominance and control over you, chuckling lowly. you was his, every fiber of your being was his, and he'd take care of you properly. his thrusts were hard to take in, his size and speed.. aeons. the way his cock slides in so easily had him biting his lip, he’s so mean and strict whenever you both make love, spanking you a few times whenever he sees you dozing off!

his eyes never left yours, even when he would immediately pull out when you were on the verge of orgasming, earning a sweet whine from your lips. “please.. please let me cum! sunday, baby please.. i can’t hold it anymore!” oh, how if only you knew how much he loves it when you beg. “oh baby.. i love it when you beg like that.” sunday groaned deeply from pleasure, landing another smack to your ass.. grinning at the sight of you swirling beneath him, “it only makes me wanna do this more.. it makes me wanna keep you here, stop you from cumming all over my cock. do you want that?” “n—no please.. please let me cum, sunday.. i need it—“ “keep begging, my angel. maybe i’ll let you cum if you keep begging and whining for me. come now, speak up.”

⊹ BIKER!SUNDAY who absolutely loves using vibrators on you whenever you both go out together, it’s amusing to him! (stupid bastard) he would increase it’s speed at random times to catch you off guard.. for his own amusement. listen, you really love your boyfriend but sometimes you just wanna slap that stupid smile off his face. you were casually picking out some candy in the candy aisle, a soft smile on your face before you felt that same old sensation within you.. causing a gasp to leave your pretty lips. “mm.. what are you looking at here, my love?” sunday murmured softly, chuckling at your vulnerable state. “sunday.. lower the speed please..” you begged, aeons! you were stupid to even think he’d decrease it’s speed!

your boyfriend smirked, the vibrator’s speed only grew more by the second as you could feel the wetness of your pussy seep through your panties, filling you with humiliation and embarrassment as you could barely walk, holding your hand over your mouth. “fuck.. sunday please..” you knew begging wasn’t gonna get you anywhere.. you knew you would have to have that stupid thing inside you for hours on end, overstimulating your pussy and entire body while your boyfriend watched and held you with pure amusement. to your bewilderment, there were times where sunday would go as far to fingering you by a nearby alleyway, his hands drenched in your juices. this man.. you wanted to be mad at him but you couldn’t bring yourself to be. sunday’s pretty fingers dug deep into your drenched pussy, knuckles deep while he had that same stupid sadistic smile on his face. “i should put that thing in you more.. look how wet your pussy is. it’s practically drooling for me, angel.”

⊹ 𝐈𝐋 𝐃𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐄𝐍𝐆

sfw.

⊹ BIKER!DANHENG who is more of a private relationship typa guy, he prefers to keep his relationships private! despite this, he still shows his love for you in many other ways, it’s easy to say that some people are even surprised he was dating you, because of how reserved he is when it came to personal matters <3 he values his and yours’ privacy, you can trust me on that!

⊹ BIKER!DANHENG who struggles putting on his helmet because of his horns (lol), you find it really cute! whenever he leaves your house, sometimes he takes 10 minutes trying to figure out how to wear a helmet because of his horns. he found this so annoying to the point he probably had a custom helmet made for him and his horns!

you nearly let out a giggle when you gazed at him, struggling to wear his helmet over his head. dan heng’s tail swished against his leg, glancing up at you with a slight frown. “[name], it’s not funny.”

⊹ BIKER!DANHENG who would teach you how to ride a motorcycle so you and him can ride around together, i mean.. you can’t blame him! he doesn’t show it much, but he really does hope to spend more time with you, and he thinks this is effective and efficient! dan heng would guide you through it slowly, keeping his hands on your waist while he helped your practice with the brakes and all you needed to know! to be honest, this was really just an excuse to touch you, but can you blame him? his large hands would brush against your hips, helping you adjust and sit properly, it’s a good thing these things take awhile to learn!

“mhm, i got you.” his thumb rubbed circles on your hips, humming. “you’re a fast learner, [name]. you never fail to surprise me.”

nsfw.

⊹ BIKER!DANHENG who just loves having your pretty mouth wrapped around his cock after an exhausting day of biking all day and night. soft gasps and whimpers left his lips as he showed a completely different side of him that night, full of pure desperation and need. “am i.. doing this right?” your voice was muffled against his dick, sending vibrations to his nerves as his hand was carefully placed atop of your head, body aching for release. “yes.. keep sucking me off like that..” with a grunt, he closed his eyes briefly while savouring the warmth of your tongue tracing circles around the sensitive slit.

"more please, baby..“ dan heng begged, arching his back slightly as your warm, wet tongue caressed the head of his cock, teasing him mercilessly before sliding down its veiny shaft. the sensation was foreign yet familiar, sending waves of pleasure coursing through his body. unable to resist any longer, he reached down, gripping your hair tightly as he thrusts his hips upward, pushing deeper into your waiting mouth.his breathing became heavier, the sound of each labored gasp echoing in the otherwise silent room, punctuated by the sloppy sounds of your mouth working him over. your tongue swirls around the base of his cock, teasing the sensitive area underneath his balls before returning to suck and stroke him feverishly. “you’re so good to me.. s.. so good to me..”

⊹ BIKER!DANHENG who would let you ride him just like how he lets you ride his motorcycles! he just wants to put your pleasure first, really. dan heng’s mind raced as he watched you ride him. he was going to lose it, he knew it very well. the sight of you bouncing on his cock, your pussy coating his cock with pure white juices, the sound of your gasps, and the feeling of your breasts against his chest created a whirlwind of emotions. he watched you struggle to stifle your moans while gripping your waist lightly, offering support and reassurance. "you’re doing great, love. fuck.. take your time and do what feels good," he encouraged, his voice low and steady.

he hoped his presence provided comfort, guiding his precious girlfriend to enjoy the sensations without feeling pressure to perform. their bodies moved in harmony together, lust fuelled by the thrill of victory as dan heng’s breaths grew ragged. his face flushed at the sight of your breasts bouncing, biting his lip at how overwhelming this was.. the sound of skin slapping against each other was all that came through, their moans punctuated the intensity of their shared moment. your hands grabbed everywhere.. his biceps, his chest, and oh.. even his horns. he was absolutely losing it. “sh—shit.. use my cock, use my cock for your own pleasure, beloved.. you’re doing so well..”

@ NEUVISTAR. do not plagiarize, claim my work as your own, translate or share my posts on any platform outside of tumblr.

[impactedfates]

Yapper Boyfriend - Various HSR Boys x GN!Reader

★ Summary: Your boyfriend loves to talk and you love to listen, though sometimes it puts a stop to what you're doing or you can tell it's getting him worked up. So what better why to make sure he's happy then stopping him with a kiss? (TLDR: Shutting your boyfriend up w/ a kiss)

☆ Characters Included (Separate): Argenti , Boothill, Mr Reca, Dr Ratio, Dan Heng + Sunday

★ Genre/Trope: Established Relationship + Romantic + Fluff

☆ Warnings: None

★ Extra: Mr Reca may be OOC (Getting used to his character still) // Sunday may be OOC // Slightly Proof Read // Writing kiss scenes are awkward...

Your beautiful boyfriend Argenti, he was the greenest flag you've ever met. You never minded his yapping and praises for Idrila, that's just how he was. And honestly, seeing him hold a long dead god with such high regard after all this time was admirable.

Though at times, it can interrupt your dates. And that's what was happening now. You were both visiting a planet and stumbled upon a shrine for the very goddess he worships. Immediately, he lets go of your hand and kneels in front of it, he sings his praises to it.

You could only sigh and smile softly as he did so. Though that wasn't the end of the praises you heard, even after walking away. The conversation you were having with your boyfriend slowly turned into him praising Idrila again. You knew why, it was rare to find any followers of Beauty these days let alone find a shrine dedicated to her.

Though, you'd much prefer singing praises to him and how great he was. You didn't mind too much listening. You knew he was passionate about his goddess and who were you to stop him. You couldn't help but admire him. You also couldn't mind just...

"It's just fantastic isn't it my love? Seeing a shrine so well kept for goddess Idrila. It's just-"

You quickly leaned up, kissing him softly on the lips. He was quick to reciprocate, leaning into your touch before you two pulled away.

"I...aha, sorry. Was I going on again my dear?"

"Don't worry, continue. You just looked so passionate about this, I couldn't help myself"

"Those forking, son of a nice ladies!!"

Your lover huffed. Boothill crossed his arms as he grumbled, letting you mess with his hair as he continued to complain. It was understandable, the IPC was incredibly annoying this time around. He wanted to get a drink at the nearby bar but some of the IPC subordinates were there and quickly tried to pick a fight with him.

Causing all of them to be kicked out. He grumbled more as he kept muttering things under his breath. A 'mother forking' here, a few 'shirt bags' there and of course 'fudge heads'

Your hands worked to braid his hair slowly, hoping it would calm him down like the previous times but it seems as though you'd have to use a different tactic.

You leaned his head towards you before quickly planting a kiss on his lips, effectively stopping his next words from coming out. He sat there in surprise, even after you pulled away, he just looked at you before quickly turning away with a chuckle.

"Well I'll be damned...got me there sweetheart"

"Reca-"

"And the camera movement! Why focus on the trees when the drama is happening with the characters!?"

"Rec-"

"Oh and don't get me STARTED on the lighting, like really? That kind of lighting for that kind of scene?"

"...Re-"

"OH AND DID I MENTION-"

You sighed, your attempts at even just soothing your partner's emotions coming to a fail. How could you do anything if he's going to criticize the movie you had just watched. Or was this just spite because you complimented one of the characters? You could only listen as Mr Reca continued his onslaught on the film's cinematography.

God you knew yourself the film was bad. This was meant to be a fun date night as you two cringed at the movies but your boyfriend was getting rather into it. Eventually after 5 minutes of this thorough review, you reach over, putting your hands gently on either side of his face, cupping his cheek. You quickly lean in to kiss him before he could utter another word.

When you pulled away he looked at you stunned for a second before grinning like an idiot. That god damn smile you fell in love with.

"Perfect! Brilliant! You see, THAT is what the lead should've done during that confession scene!"

You couldn't help but let out a laugh as he took your hands into his, as he praised your action, comparing it to the film. You will say though, your plan of stopping his review on the film was a success, even if now he was ranting about how great the "scene" was when you kissed him.

Aeons you only asked one question, you figured your boyfriend would know and now you're stuck listening to Dr Ratio yap about something, that you can't even tell has any correlation to your original question.

It's not that you minded, you loved learning new facts but the problem was...checking the time, if he didn't notice soon Dr Ratio would be late to his next lesson...and while that could be interesting and funny to see.

The oh so strict Dr Ratio late to his lesson. You didn't want that for him. But you didn't know how to stop him, when he gets into a lecture he really gets into it. So how could you...

Ah! You got it.

You stood up and walked towards him, tugging on his shirt so he'd turn his head towards you, you leaned up and kissed him. It was quick and simple before you pulled away.

"I-...what was that for?"

Oho, a blushing and flustered Dr Ratio is so much better then a late Dr Ratio.

"You have a class to attend remember?"

"...[Name], I don't go to school anymore"

"...Darling...you're a teacher"

When those words left your mouth you could see him mentally face palm as he quickly grabbed his items. He muttered out a thank you as he kissed your cheek, checking his phone to see how much more time he had left before rushing to his class.

Now Dan Heng wasn't really a yapper. He often listened to you yapping instead. And on the occasion he would shut you up with a kiss. It always made you flustered, and it wasn't even to really shut you up to be quiet. He just couldn't help himself, you looked so passionate in your topic he couldn't help but lean in to give you some affection before gesturing you to continue.

For once, you wanted to do it to him. To kiss him when he was rambling about something, make him flustered and just motion him to continue. But he wasn't one to easily ramble about something.

You eventually came up with an idea though, it wasn't exactly the best and it didn't exactly involve him rambling but...y'know if it works it works.

You asked him to read out the some of the texts to the databank, like a story book. He blinked at you confused but agreed. He read one, two and another until you finally put your plan into motion, you leaned up to kiss him. He was stunned for a moment as you pulled away.

"...was that your plan all along? To shut me up with a kiss?"

"...maybe"

He let out a small chuckle. Shaking his head in disbelief.

"You're unbelievable, to ask me to read out the data banks just so you could shut me up with a kiss"

You stayed silent for a bit with a blush, realising how silly the plan sounded now.

"...please continue with the databank talk..."

“I’m sorry”

Those words were the first thing uttered out of his mouth when you saw him again. When you opened the door and saw your boyfriend again.

“I’m…so…so sorry”

He repeats, holding your hand as he brings it up to his face. He looks at you, you can tell he’s holding back tears. Aeons you haven’t seen him since…well, the incident with the Charmony festive. You haven’t seen him since he was imprisoned, how he managed to get out?

You didn’t care, your boyfriend was back but…he didn’t look well.

“I-I didn’t…I thought…”

He struggled to get the words out, holding your hand as if you were a delicate doll and one wrong move would break you apart and he’d be alone again.

“…I just wanted the best for everyone…I-I promise…I…I didn’t think…about…all the details…I-I thought what I was doing was right but it wasn’t…aeons…I’ve hurt so many people haven’t I…”

You listened, hearing his apologies just spill out as tears threatened to follow suit. He couldn’t even look you in the eye anymore, he felt too ashamed too. How could he after all that he’s done?

Yet another apology was about to leave his lips until he felt soft ones fall on top of his. He froze, eyes widening in surprise as you kissed him.

How…

How could you…still give him affection? When he finally looked at you, you looked at him so gently, so kindly.

How

How did he deserve that? No he doesn’t deserve that, he doesn’t deserve the way you gently lead him into your house, sit him down and hug him…you’re…happy he’s okay?

He watched you carefully as you went to brew a cup of tea for the both of you…Aeons, he’s so lucky to have you.

Sorry for not uploading in while. Schools hectic and I’m a year away before I have to plan on colleges.

Anyways, I hope you all liked this one ^^

I tried to make sure the “kisses” were done at an appropriate time/scenario if that makes sense

I have another draft in the works so hopefully I’ll get it done eventually

[lovemybluebully]

Salad is a Four Letter Word

Soooooo Venom seems to be popular again, especially with my new pal @ticklishdeadpool so this one is for you, buddy! 🍻

While I don't think I'm going to see the new movie I did decide to dig into my graveyard of abandoned fics. Found this WIP that I had started after the first movie came out and have now filled in all the gaps for your viewing pleasure. It was a little tricky as I haven't seen the movie in awhile, but hope I did okay. For that reason, I probably won't be writing anymore Venom fics for the current time, but at least this one will be out there now.

It's a totally nonsense-type of fic. lol Didn't really have anywhere that I was going with it so it had been abandoned, but still just fun, silly interactions between Eddie and Venom. With tickles of course! Me, write a fic without tickling? 🤣 Good one.

If you have a flesh-loving alien inside of you, you don't threaten to force him to eat salad. 😆

Venom (Movieverse)

Word Count: 2,546

"What are we doing here? We don't like this place."

Eddie let out an exasperated groan as he stood in the lobby of the hospital, waiting for the elevator to come back down.

"I already told you, Anne just wants to be safe and have Dan check me out. You know, just in case my body is having any adverse effects to you practically living inside me."

"We can assure you it is not," Venom gave an offended growl from inside of him just as the elevator doors opened.

"Yeah, well as much as I'd like to believe you we'll let the body scan decide that," Eddie nodded as he stepped into the elevator and pushed the button to the correct floor.

"Eddie doesn't trust us," the symbiote accused, prompting Eddie to roll his eyes as they moved up the floors of the building. For a powerful super alien from outer space he could sure be sensitive sometimes.

"Shut up, it's not that it's just that I need proof. I'm a reporter, and I like to have the facts."

"The fact is you're being a traitorous piece of shit."

The elevator finally stopped as they reached the selected floor and Eddie walked out into the hallway. He sighed heavily once he stopped in front of the door to Dan's office; his eyes looking up towards the ceiling as if trying to find his calm.

"Tell you what, if you behave here then we'll go get some McDonald's after this. Fair?"

"....Ok, deal. But lets make it a quick visit! I'm hungry!"

"You're always hungry," Eddie shook his head as he opened the door where the doctor and Anne were waiting.

"Hi Eddie, really nice to see you again," Dan welcomed him as he stood up from his desk and walked around to shake Eddie's hand.

"You too. Uh sorry we're late. My alarm didn't go off, and when I was trying to get out the door Venom was being his usual primadonna self and-Gaah!" Eddie grunted when a single symbiote tendril reached out and poked him in the ribs, just under the armpit.

"Keep talking, Eddie," Venom hissed threateningly; his head popping out from his host's back and wrapping himself over the wide shoulders.

"Well now I see who wears the pants in this relationship," Dan laughed, but it died out when Eddie gave him an annoyed glare, not finding his joke amusing in the slightest.

"It's a good thing you're a doctor and not a comedian."

"And it's a good thing you're a reporter and not a giant loser....oh wait," Venom snickered to himself while Eddie glared back at him.

"That's it. Deal's off."

"NOOOOO!!!" Venom wailed in sorrow as Eddie gave a smug grin and reconfirmed his earlier comment.

"See? Primadonna."

"Come on, guys, take it easy. This will all be quick and painless," Anne tried to break it up, though always finding their antics to be amusing.

"Yeah, it shouldn't be bad at all. Very standard procedure. So if you're ready we can get this all underway."

Eddie was then handed a hospital gown to change into as Dan led the way down to the lab.

.......................................

"Alright, buddy, we're gonna do an MRI now, and I know you don't like that so take a hike for a minute," Eddie instructed the alien as he gestured a thumb away from himself.

"Do I have to?"

"Just do it, would ya?"

"Ohhh ok," Venom grumbled as he seeped out of Eddie onto the floor, mostly forming into a blob, but with a serpent-like head extending out. Eddie blinked for a moment and then smirked down at the symbiote.

"You know, I never noticed how cute you actually look like that."

"We are not cute!" Venom glared up at him as Anne looked the symbiote over and nodded.

"You kinda are," she agreed with a grin, causing Venom to hiss and slither off out of the room.

"Well lets get this over with before Venom has a heart attack from not eating for thirty minutes," Eddie joked, purposely saying it loud enough for the alien to hear.

"It's been an hour, you prick!"

"Ooooh sorry, one whole hour! Someone better call CPS on me," Eddie rolled his eyes and climbed up onto the table. He then laid down with his arms at his sides as Anne looked back at Dan to give him the go ahead.

"Alright, we're all set. Here goes nothing," Dan said over the speaker as he controlled the conveyor to slide into the tube until only Eddie's legs and feet were sticking out, "Now try not to move and this won't take long."

"Got it," Eddie nodded, but with the position he was in Anne couldn't resist teasing him a little.

"Comfy in there?" Anne grinned playfully, running a finger up the bottom of Eddie's bare foot as the man yelped and jerked his leg.

"He-Hey! Well not when you do THAT!"

"Sorry, it's just too easy," she briefly tickled his other foot receiving another squawk of objection as Eddie pulled up his knees to put his feet flat on the table.

"Heehee, stop it!"

"Get him again, Anne," Venom goaded into the microphone from where he sat next to Dan inside the control room as Eddie yelled back at him.

"Shut your mouth, parasite!"

Dan was trying to remain professional, but had to use his hand to cover his mouth so he could hide his amused smile.

"Lay still, please. Anne, leave the patient alone."

Anne smirked, giving him a wink as she walked away to join Dan and Venom. Once he saw that she was at a safe distance Eddie put his legs back down.

A few moments later the machine came to life and began the in-depth scan, while the three observed on the monitors in the control room. After a minute of looking at the pictures on the screens Dan cleared his throat.

"Hmm. Well that's interesting...," the doctor trailed off in his thought, making Eddie assume something was wrong.

"What? What do you see?! He hasn't been snacking on my organs, has he?! Venom!"

"Actually everything looks perfectly normal. Organs are all intact, no restrictions in your blood flow, heart looks healthy, brain functions are top notch. All in all I'd say you check out just fine. It's incredible," Dan put his hands up in astonishment as he sat back in his chair.

"So you're saying that having Venom inside of him hasn't done any damage whatsoever?"

Anne was just as surprised to learn this new information as Dan shook his head in response.

"Not that I can see, no."

"Told you, pussy," Venom sneered haughtily, slithering out of the control room back into view while the conveyor drew Eddie out of the machine.

"Well that's a relief," Eddie sat up and immediately began putting his clothes back on, "Guess I can sleep better tonight knowing that this parasite inside me isn't leeching off of my body so much."

"That can easily change if Eddie keeps calling us names...," the symbiote growled as Eddie just shook his head with an amused smirk. Dan then walked out into the room, scribbling some notes onto a clipboard.

"Alright, well since we're all done with that it's safe for Venom to get back into your body now."

"Yes!" Venom whooped as he quickly hurled himself at Eddie, knocking him back onto the table.

"Hey! Watch it!" Eddie grunted as he then found himself forced off of the table to his feet.

"Come on, lets go Eddie! Now!" Venom shouted as he took control and yanked Eddie's body across the room towards the door much to the surprise of the other two.

"Uhh, goodbye?" Anne gave an awkwardly half-wave.

"I promised him McDonaaaaaaald's!" Eddie's voice faded as Venom violently drug him out of the room.

A SHORT WHILE LATER....

"Happy now?" Eddie asked with a sickened frown as he recanted watching Venom devour over ten quarter pounder cheeseburgers. The alien belched in response from inside of him as they walked down the sidewalk.

"Yes. That will probably hold us over for another hour or so."

"You know, you're a pretty expensive date," Eddie groaned as he looked into his wallet, only having a few dollars remaining now.

"Would you rather we ate a human instead?"

"Uhhh no, heh. No, I'd appreciate if you didn't do that," he laughed nervously as he glanced around at all the people on the busy street that Venom could easily snatch up if he so desired.

"Well then you shouldn't complain. Besides, you love us."

"In a really screwed up kinda way, yeah I guess so," Eddie smirked, "Now shut up, will ya? People are gonna think I'm crazy if they see me walking around and talking to myself."

"People already think we are crazy," Venom pointed out, making Eddie shake his head.

"Not complete strangers. Now not another word until we get back home. Got it?"

"But Eddie we can't stay quiet that long..."

Eddie just kept his mouth closed, pretending he didn't hear anything.

"Eddie...."

Still Eddie continued to ignore him

"EddieEddieEddieEddieEddie!"

Eddie just continued facing forward as he focused on getting back to his apartment down the street.

"Ignore me will you...," Venom then grinned slyly as he crept out underneath Eddie's jacket to stay unseen and then gently squeezed the man's shirt covered ribs, making his body jerk in an unusual fashion.

"Gggnnh! You little...!" Eddie yelled just as he was passing a mother with her child, who looked at him accusingly as she pulled her daughter closer and hurried on.

"I'm...I'm sorry, I didn't mean....Not her, I just....," he tried to explain himself as he stammered after them to no avail, hearing the mother mention something to the little girl about, 'That is why you don't do drugs'.

Venom chuckled at how perfect the timing of that had been as Eddie growled.

"Alright, very funny. Now stay still and stay quiet," he muttered, trying not to move his lips too much as his outburst had attracted some unwanted eyes.

He'd made it another half a block before his sides were being attacked again as he stumbled and clamped his arms down.

"Eeheehee!" He gave a high-pitched giggle, prompting some of the street vendors to give him odd looks as he blushed and tried to walk a little faster.

"Will you stop? You're making me look insane."

"Can we talk again?"

"No!" Eddie hissed, "Just keep your fucking mouth shut, and wait until we-Ehahahah!"

The tentacled goo dug into his armpits for a few moments as Eddie squirmed in place and laughed wildly.

"No, not there!" He yelped just as the tickling stopped, looking up to find people had paused on the street to stare at him with curious eyes.

"I uh...heh.....I'm just uhhh....," when he couldn't think of any kind of believable explanation he quickly just turned and walked away again.

"I hate you so much right now," he whispered loudly through gritted teeth, hearing Venom laugh from within and knowing he was getting a big kick out of making Eddie look like a fool.

"Think that's funny? Well guess who's eating nothing but salads for the next week or two."

Venom's snickers immediately were cut off as he was now silent for a moment.

".....You're bluffing," his voice was full of uncertainty and worry and that made Eddie smirk, knowing he had the upper hand now.

"Tickle me again and find out, fucker," Eddie threatened vaguely, and just let Venom stew in his thoughts for now about whether he was being serious or not.

It seemed to work as he had now made it a few blocks without incident, even stopping to have a nice chat with Mrs. Chen when he came across her sweeping up her store front.

"Evening, Mrs. Chen."

"Hello Eddie. Not going to buy a chocolate bar today like usual?"

"No, no chocolate. I was thinking about going on a diet actually," Eddie smirked slightly as he rubbed at his stomach.

"Ohhh, he's not going to like that," she smiled, referring to Venom and knowing that he was the one who had the sweet tooth.

"Well it's for his own good. Besides he's been misbehaving a lot lately so I had to put my foot down. Say you don't happen to sell any saHAAlads, do yoohou?" His body spasmed out of nowhere as the shop keeper gave him a concerned look.

"What's wrong, Eddie? Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm f-INE! I'm juhust....Venom keeps....teehehehehee...I...I gotta go-ho, Mrs. Chen," Eddie stuttered through his giggles as he gave her a wave and continued on his way down the street.

"Don't worry, dear, he'll be back for that chocolate," Mrs. Chen called to Venom with a smile as the alien peeked out from under the back of Eddie's jacket and gave her a wink.

"V! What did I tell you?!" Eddie spat once they were out of earshot, "You really want to eat nothing but salads for a week?!"

All was quiet for a few moments before Venom finally gave a reply that made Eddie's skin crawl.

"Worth it."

A split second later and the tendrils were everywhere on his upper body; this time staying underneath his t-shirt to get directly at the bare skin. They were wriggling all over from his hips and belly all the way up his sides into his armpits, and there was nothing Eddie could do to try to hide his reactions.

The man was in a laughing fit now as he nearly fell over but managed to find his footing and continued to hurry down the sidewalk despite all the people staring at the hysterically laughing man as he went by. The tickling was unrelenting this time as he desperately looked for some kind of escape.

He finally was able to duck down an alleyway, stumbling and tripping over a garbage can as he went further down. After giving a brief look to make sure no one was around he collapsed with his back against a wall and shouted through his laughter.

"Okaaahaay! Okaahaahaaay! Hahahaha! You caahaan tahahalk agahahain! Now pleeeheease st....stop tihihickling meeheee!" His arms uselessly pressed to his sides as he kicked out and squirmed.

"And the salads.....?" Venom pressed with goo squirming up to tickle the reporter's sensitive neck as well, making him squeal out giggles.

"A johohoke! Juhuhust a johohohoke! Ahaahahaheeheehee! Plehehease buhuhuddy! I'm sohohorry!" Eddie shouted for mercy and was grateful when it was granted to him as he tried to calm down and get his breath back. Venom then popped out of his jacket to give him a shit-eating smile.

"Nice of you to come around, Eddie."

"....You're an asshole," Eddie glared playfully at him, giving him a small shove.

"Takes one to know one."

"Yeah? I thought I was a pussy?"

"Yes, but you're our pussy," the symbiote replied as Eddie's face gradually twisted in revulsion.

"Uhhh, thanks? I mean, that hardly sounds like a compliment, but thanks?"

"The best pussy we've ever had," Venom grinned proudly, in his mind thinking that had sounded better as Eddie only sighed and put his face in his palms.

"Please stop."

"Definitely the biggest."

"You can still eat me, right?"

[jtl-fics]

Fluent Freshman - Part 32

PREV

He had the first week back from Thanksgiving break off from both classes and practice.

The week off of classes leaves FF feeling like getting stabbed has been a net positive experience for him.

First he feels like it really cemented the apparent friendship he had with at least Andrew and Neil. Second, he technically had a job offer in his Freshman year. Third, and most important, his language professor who had wanted him to come and speak to his gen-ed Latin class of over 100 students told him not to worry about it and that he had gotten one of FF’s friends to agree to the presentation instead.

His relief was so immediate and all-consuming that he hadn’t even had the energy to pretend he was upset that he had been replaced. Thankfully his teacher just chalked it up to relief that he wouldn’t have to stand up and present when his stomach was healing from the surgery.

Coach Wymack and Abby wouldn’t even let him go to the Court. Kevin had tried to argue quite a few times on Sunday when that decision had been made. Argued that he could sit in and watch for strategy purposes if nothing else.

However, even Kevin couldn’t guarantee that FF wouldn’t get accidentally run into / knocked against considering his complete lack of presence.

Matt had rushed into Abby’s house having made a bee-line for it upon reaching the airport.  “Smiths! You got stabbed!” Matt yelled as if informing him of his own predicament.

“Yeah.” FF agreed as if it were something that could have been debated.

“What happened?! Nicky just sent a pic of the flowers he got you and the card?” Matt had asked pulling his backpack off his shoulder and to his front as he unzipped it and rooted around for something before pulling out an orange envelope. “This is from me and Dan, you remember her right?” Matt had asked.

FF thought of quiet conversations he has overheard over the phone and not so quiet noises Matt makes when engaging in some phone sex with his girlfriend.

“Yes, I remember Dan.”  FF had said diplomatically and accepted the card.

The card was sitting on the nightstand at Abby’s house next to the card the Monsters, his grandma, other teammates, and some cards from friends he had made outside of Exy. It feels nice to look at the multiple cards all wishing him well.

His Grandma was going to stay for two weeks and Abby was being incredibly kind to put them up

He spent most of that week sleeping, spending time with his grandma, getting yelled at by Abby for trying to do chores, and spending time with the Foxes that came to visit him.

Nicky had come over to hang out every day without fail. Most of the upperclassmen who were on the original ‘miracle’ team of the Foxes stopped in to see him regularly. Even Jack stopped in to complain about how Captain Neil presented a danger to the rest of them before giving him a Get Well Soon card and leaving.

It was a strangely thoughtful card that he’s near positive Jack’s girlfriend picked out for him. When the end of the week and the first game that FF would need to sit out from approached Coach Wymack asked if he wanted to come.

“You can’t play, but you’re still a Fox.” Wymack had said and his grandma had encouraged him to go and spend time with his friends. She’d hold down the fort for Abby, cook up a bunch of food for the the team to enjoy when they got back late.

So FF climbed onto the bus and sat next to Nicky who had declared himself FF’s bodyguard for the evening who’s safety he would only pass off to Coach Wymack during the game proper.

***

They’ve come so damn far from the worst team in the Division. His kids are thriving and because of that he’s gotten a larger budget. A larger budget to better help his kids with. David would be lying if he said he didn’t spend some nights wishing he could tell himself of a few years ago just how good it would get.

Still, the match is a lot closer than it should be.

He looks to his side and sees FF sitting there watching the game with rapt attention.

He looks as Sheena fumbles a pass that his newest problem child had mastered the timing of a month before. He sees Kevin’s shoulders go up in anger but Neil’s quick reflexes save it before the play is fully fumbled.

Neil makes a feint to pass to Kevin and the goal lights up putting them in the lead by 2 goals. David thinks of the numerous plays that would have gone smoother with the kid next to him playing instead of Sheena but there was no point in wishing for things that couldn’t be.

FF wouldn’t be playing until the Spring Championships started up and David would need to address FF’s medical hiatus and Lisa’s ‘family emergency’ that had her leaving the team.

It always stung when a Fox left but it hurt less when it was of their own volition instead of in a body bag.

He looks to the side again and thinks of the numerous decisions he had needed to make as Kevin slept in the car on the way to the hospital. Honestly, if he still was thinking about going after the hospital.

How the fuck did the hospital just leave the damn kid in a hallway for over an hour? He hates the thought of FF laying there in pain and bleeding watching as people went by.

He’s grateful that the kid didn’t seem to remember it.

He wasn’t going to mention it to any of the other Foxes, not even FF if he could swing it. He has no doubt that at the very least Andrew and Neil would go on a rampage and he’s near positive that Kevin would take special delight in it considering a week on he was still bitching about what he had seen in the Nutritionist office.

He’s not sure what Nicky would do but he knows it’d give him a headache.

Nicky takes a hard hit that has him subbed out for one of the freshman backliners. Nicky’s a little woozy and Abby confirms a very slight concussion that she’ll keep an eye on during the trip back.

They win by slimmer margins than they should but it’s to be expected.

“Coach Wymack?” FF asks.

“What’s up?” David asks.

“I’m going to go to the bathroom. It...uh...well it takes a while now.” FF says and David can read the embarrassment.

“Meet us at the bus. Be careful.” he orders.

FF nods and heads off.

Neil and Matt are on press duty and David preps the press to let them know about FF and Lisa. There are some questions about what kind of medical hiatus but David declined to answer knowing that Neil and Matt wouldn’t let it slip either.

His last two players get showered and on the bus.

He does a count and gets the correct number and starts the bus.

They’re just about to get on the highway when there’s a shout, “Wait! Where’s Smithy?!” Nicky exclaims full volume over the general conversation that had been going on throughout the bus.

David frowns, he had counted-

Abby. He had counted Abby’s head next to Nicky.

“Oh god dammit.” he says.

***

FF looked at where the bus should have been waiting for him.

He closes his eyes and hopes that the bus will appear between blinks. 

He opens his eyes again and finds...nope just fans milling about heading to their own cars and home. He gives a hopeful look across the parking lot wondering if the bus maybe just got moved back somewhere so that they could get out easier after he went and made them wait?

A lot of people. Some kids. Some disappointed Belmonte fans. Some excited Fox fans. Some general Exy fanatics who were discussing what the Belmonte team would need to do to stay in  for the Spring Championships.

No Palmetto State Fox team bus.

He swallows a bit of disappointment and moves past it.

He pulled up his phone to plug in Abby’s house and saw that it would be a 4 day hike from Belmonte. He looked down at his shoes contemplating if they’d make the over 300 miles of walking. The doctors and Abby had been very clear not to do too much exercise but surely it wouldn’t count since he was just going to walk? They said walking was fine right?

FF sighed at the thought.

Yeah, it wasn’t going to work.

His stomach hurts at the thought of a 5 hour car ride. Maybe there was a bus station nearby and he could make his way back via greyhound.

He was looking at his phone again when it started to ring and Nicky’s face was on his screen to let him know who the caller was.

He hit the answer button, “Hello-“

There was an inhale and FF had been on the receiving end of this quite a few times at this point so he held his phone the entire length of his arm away from his ear, “SMITHY, ARE YOU ON THE BUS OR DID WE FORGET YOU?!” Nicky screeches and it hurts his ears even from an entire arms length away. He wonders how in the world Nicky can stand being that loud with his minor concussion.

He stares at his phone dubiously for a few moments, worried that Nicky may shout again.

“Smithy?! Smithy?” He hears Nicky’s not quite as loud but very concerned voice. FF decides to bite the bullet.

“Hello Nicky, I am not on the bus.” He says.

“We fucking LEFT SMITHY!” Nicky yells and FF can hear a collective groan from across the line.

He may even hear Coach Wymack yelling something about ‘again’ and feels shame burn in his stomach. He should have just held in his pee. He hadn’t really needed to go that badly and it’s not like Coach Wymack doesn’t take bathroom breaks.

“It’s okay.” He rushes to assure Nicky. “I can…grab a bus or something. You don’t need to come back, I’m-“

“Young man, if you say that you’re fine I can not be held responsible for what I will do when I see you in the next 20 minutes.” Nicky threatens. “I also can’t be held responsible for what I’ll do to Neil since I feel like he’s infected you somehow.” He says.

He hears a distant “Hey” followed by an even more distant “Man, I hate to say it but I think he’s right.”

“I don’t want to bother you.” He says.

“Smithy, you are so far from a bother it is insane. How about I stay on the line with you okay?” Nicky asks but something has caught his eye.

Two kids haven’t moved as the rest of the world continued to. He watched as they clung to one another and no one seemed to take notice of them. He doesn’t understand how anyone could miss them with the bright orange children’s jerseys they had on. One sporting 01 - Josten and the other 10 - Josten on the backs.

“That’s okay Nicky. Call me when you’re close.” He says and makes his way over.

He can see the little boy’s hand holding the little girl’s hand tightly and is careful to walk around them in a way so that he wouldn’t appear out of nowhere. “Hey,” he squatted down to their height and the little boy still jumped slightly, dropping a small book to the ground, and the little girl hid her face in his shoulder. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I just noticed you looked a little lost.” He says and his muscles won’t pull in a way to offer a reassuring smile but he hopes he can convey it through his tone.

The little boy visibly swallows down nervous spit, “I’m not supposed to talk to strangers.” He says holding on tighter to the little girl.

“Smart, continue to do that.” He says immediately, “Can you just nod yes or no for me?” He asks instead.

The boy thinks for a long moment before nodding affirmatively.

“Great, good job.” He says, “Did you come to the stadium with your parents?” He asks

A nod in the affirmative.

“Do your parents know where you are?” He asks.

He shakes his head in a negative.

“Are you lost?” He asks.

Another negative.

“So you mean to be right here?”  He wants to clarify.

A nod in the affirmative this time.

FF takes a moment to piece together what he knows and looks down at the book.

An autograph book. “Oh, you wanted to get an autograph from Captain Neil?” he asks.

The little boy looks up but it’s the little girl who answers. She finally takes her face out from his shoulder. FF’s eyes can’t help but see the large burn scar on her cheek but also see how her eyes sparkle with delight, “You know Captain Josten?!” she exclaims in delight.

“Millie!” The young boy says. “He’s a stranger!” he hisses.

“Nu-uh!” she shakes her head, “Number 13!” she points at his jersey he had worn in solidarity. “He passes to Captain Josten!” she says brightly. “See Brandon?” she smiles.

It could just be a fan jersey though FF highly doubts that anyone would buy fan merch for him. He is no Kevin Day, Captain Neil Josten, or Andrew Minyard.

Still the little boy, Brandon, looks at him with wide eyes, “You’re Smith?” he asks.

“Yeah.” FF nods, “Captain Neil is my Captain.” he says.

“I love Captain Josten! I wanna marry him!” Millie says and FF can’t help but wonder if Andrew would squash such adorable competition. “His face is like mine!” she giggles.

“Yeah, your face is as cool as Captain Neil’s is.” FF agrees with completely sincerity.

“We came out here to get Captain Josten’s signature” Brandon says with a pout, “All the adults were in the way and it was...kind of scary.” he admits with a flush.

A thought occurs to him. He doesn’t want to leave these kids and brave the crowds to find someone to announce the lost kids. It would only be about 12 more minutes before the bus comes. Coach Wymack would be able to help and...

“They’re coming to pick me up pretty soon. How about we stay right here and we can get Captain Neil’s autograph together?” he asks.

Both kids light up at the idea. “Really?” they both ask.

“Yeah, I also want Captain Neil’s autograph.” he says because he does. He’s wanted Captain Neil’s autograph for AGES but had been too awkward to ask. Then Greg had come and made it seem like FF would want it just to sell it or something.

Now he has the perfect excuse.

***

David pulled into the spot he had left almost half an hour ago and barely managed to put the bus into park before most of his more senior players were prying the door open to go look for FF.

Nicky had called but FF hadn’t picked up and it had set his more paranoid players’ teeth on edge.

The only one that stayed on the bus was Nicky since Abby had a firm grip on him.

David sighed and told everyone else to stay put before exiting the bus and began the herculean effort of trying to spot FF in a crowd.

It actually wasn’t too hard as he found his players standing and watching as FF crouched with his back to them as two little kids in orange Fox jerseys were re-enacting something for him.

He’d be tempted to let them keep going if he didn’t remember Abby’s list of specific things FF shouldn’t do with his still healing stomach and squatting like that was definitely on the list.

“Smith.” he says and watches as the Freshman jolts and tips over, thankfully onto his side, from his squatted position.

The kids get nervous when they see him but then their eyes both lock on Neil’s face. For a moment his heart aches for his player, plenty of kids have cried about Neil’s scars but then his eyes land on the little girl’s face more properly and...

Oh...

Those are stars in her eyes. David looks at the two different Josten kids jerseys that the Palmetto store had released.

FF recovers from his tumble admirably, “Coach Wymack,” he says getting up onto his feet. “These two are lost, can you see if there’s a way to contact their parents?” he asks.

David nods and pulls out his phone and steps away slightly.

He watches over the interaction that happens next.

**

As promised, FF had taken the awkward lead of asking for it and had them form a line. It had been weird but he watched as understanding dawned in Captain Neil’s eyes as he saw the two Josten jerseys. It had felt even less weird to get Captain Neil’s autograph when Matt had jokingly gotten in line behind Brandon because he too wanted Captain Neil’s autograph.

FF felt a little bad that Captain Neil had been so flustered by the requests but at least he finally had the Captain Neil autograph he’d wanted since last March. It also felt nice when Captain Neil had smiled the way he did at Millie when she babbled about how they matched.

Andrew had bumped into him in the way that FF was learning meant that he was pleased with whatever FF had just done. Kevin and Aaron had been the ones to ask if his stitches were okay after his startled tumble.

Millie and Brandon’s parents were incredibly grateful and swore to continue to be lifelong fans of the Foxes. Millie and Brandon themselves had been more excited about their Captain Neil Josten autographs than being reunited with their parents. They had waved goodbye with Millie loudly proclaiming that her and Captain Neil would get married someday.

Climbing onto the bus he was subjected to a check over by Abby when both Kevin and Aaron dragged him to her. Then he was sat down next to Nicky who shoved him into the window seat and cuddled up. “I won’t lose track of you if I’m on you.” was his logic.

The bus ride resumed.

“I didn’t know you liked kids.” Nicky says head on FF’s shoulder. “I’ve watched you go to the other side of the street to avoid middle school kids.” he adds.

FF feels ice in his stomach.

“Middle school kids are mean.” FF says and doesn’t properly answer the question but Nicky is just concussed enough to not call him on it.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

NEXT

Like I said in my last part I will be tagging people separate from the actual update going forward. Still any requests to be added to the tag list feel free to put in the replies here.

[phantomskeep]

Putting the "Fun" Back in "Funeral" Excerpts Pt. 1

okay yes I am impatient and I kind of want feedback on this idea, so have some excerpts from the Dead on Main fic I'm writing! \o/ (also I have no idea how to format things LOL). There is a very, VERY large timeskip between E1 and E2, btw. Criticisms and opinions are very welcomed!

Warning for small bits of violence in E1, and for mention of blood in E2 as well as a suggestive ending ;)

------- Excerpt One -------

Danny sometimes wishes he could travel through time. Don’t get him wrong! He knows the danger of messing up the time stream (Dan, Desiree, and Clockwork all taught him that much) but there are still times when he’ll sit on top of a building, staring at the stars, wondering what he would change given half the chance.

Currently, however, he was debating on his life choices while not on a rooftop.

White gloved hands shakily grasped broken concrete, slowly lifting his broken body out of the crater in the middle of some random street. The latest ghost who decided to try their hand at using Danny as a punching bag was one that he hadn’t encountered before. His usual roster of ghostly enemies still came by, of course. Ember, Skulker, Lunch Lady, Johnny 13, Kitty and Box Ghost at least visited Amity Park once a week, if not more. However, the ghostly entity that Danny was currently facing? He had never seen them before.

As Danny raised himself out of his impromptu resting place he considered the being before him. Dark, void black skin and fur greeted him. The ghost’s face was an odd cross between a horse’s and dogs - long, block-shaped snout with a mouth reaching right up to under their dark red eyes. Pointed ears flicked wildly back and forth between a long mane that reached just up until the collar of the ghost’s thick golden necklace. The ghost’s choice of clothes baffled the white-haired ghost greatly, black dress shirt and (oddly enough) bright golden skinny jeans? Really? Who died and thought that was a good fashion choice?

Yeah, Danny was just as confused.

The other ghost looked down at the young halfa, “I cannot fathom how you are the one Hotep described to me.” He sneered, clearly mocking Danny. “The great Akuris will easily defeat such a pathetic child.”

Danny gasped, mock-offended. “Well, Mr. Fursuit, I will have you know that at least I don’t dress like an accountant in the middle of a mid-life crisis.” He smirked before resting a soul-piercing green glare at the larger ghost floating above where Danny stood. “Or would it be mid-afterlife crisis?”

With that, Danny leapt back into action. He swung a powerful punch directly into Akuris’s long muzzle causing the dark ghost to be pushed back. Amity Park’s ghostly hero did not relent on his assault, though. Danny followed the other ghost’s backwards momentum to bodily slam into his opponent’s soft belly in a move he often saw Dash pull during his football practices. The twenty year old halfa quickly grabbed the Fenton thermos off of his belt loop, taking the opportunity to finally capture the winded ghost.

A great sigh left Danny’s body as he hovered in the air, surveying the damage leftover from the fight between the two. It was well around two in the morning, judging by the placement of the twinkling stars. Today was the day of his coronation - exactly five years after he defeated Pariah Dark.

Originally, Danny was told he was technically king of the Ghost Zone in the aftermath of the battle. The young ghost had argued with the mysterious time-themed ghost named Clockwork who appeared. Danny was successfully able to get a five-year grace period of kingly procrastination.

Since then, Danny had grown up a little bit. He defeated his alternate evil self, discovered new powers, traveled through time on Clockwork’s request, graduated highschool, took a gap year to focus solely on fighting ghosts, and successfully never let his parents or the world know about his ghostly half. All in all, Danny considered it a successful five years.

All good things must come to an end, though. The half ghost kept staring dejectedly at the stars so far away. He knew that even though he probably *should* tell his parents what was going on, the fear of everything going wrong lurked in the back of his mind. After the events of Dan, the young man pulled away from his parents bit by bit. It was grief that drove Danny to rip out the most vulnerable parts of himself, after all. If he had nothing to grieve about then he would never be pushed into doing something as drastic like destroying the world, right?

Jazz disagreed very heavily with his mentality, but he was fine with that.

Another sigh left the poor halfa’s body and he re-hooked the Fenton Thermos to his beltloop. He might as well go back home to continue to lick his wounds before Danny had to, unfortunately, be crowned king. What a shitty Tuesday.

------- Excerpt Two -------

A delightful aroma wafted through the late morning air, easily slipping between the weak rays of sunlight filtered through the windows. Jason slowly blinked as he shuffled his way out of bed, slightly wincing when his bruised leg hit the time-worn wooden floors. He still hadn’t fully recovered from the latest fight with Scarecrow – something Danny certainly wasn’t letting him forget. Thinking of the ghostly man, Jason glanced over to the other side of their shared bed only to see the sheets rumpled but obviously used. With a small sigh, Jason pushed himself off his mattress and started his sleepy trek into the apartment’s kitchen.

The sight of a smaller, pale man with his exposed back to Jason was always something the man longed to see. The first time Danny was relaxed and comfortable enough around Jason’s home (and by extension, Jason himself) to make the pair breakfast had rapidly become one of the man’s most favorite memories. It made the middle of his chest hum with feelings of pride-safe-I-did-that-yes-home-safe. Of course, seeing his boyfriend only in space-themed boxers was something Jason loved for another reason, as well.

Danny let out a small laugh, pushing back against the strong chest bracing him. “Jason,” he whined, dragging out the man’s name. The other man just hummed and dropped his chin on top of Danny’s head. Large arms wrapped securely around the younger man’s torso and waist, Jason’s steady breaths moving Danny’s smaller body as the Crime Lord hugged his lover from behind.

“Yes?” The taller man asked.

Danny half-turned his head to look into Jason’s similar crystal blue eyes. “If you keep this up the pancakes are going to end up burnt,” he warned half-heartedly.

A deep chuckle shook the smaller man’s body and Danny couldn’t help but purr contently at the feeling. Jason always made the younger feel so safe. Even when he came back to their shitty little apartment deep into the heart of Crime Alley covered in blood, or when the Pit Rage got the better of Jason so early into their relationship. Jason, to Danny, felt so much like home sometimes it physically hurt.

“What if,” Jason said slyly, blue eyes-half lidded with promise. He leaned closer onto Danny’s body, his mouth ghosting across a pointed ear. “I wanted something different for breakfast instead?”

Danny gasped as Jason finally captured his lips in a kiss. Calloused, practiced hands ran over cold cheeks and through soft hair. The half-ghost ran one hand along the stove’s counter, finding the dial to turn off the stove quickly. The man turned around in the comforting embrace before fully facing Jason.

---------------

aaaand yeah that's it! I'm slowly finishing up chapter one and I'm hoping to get it posted this weekend ^-^

[shadowcatzone]

Here's a few xingyue ones i came up with, don't think to much of them.

___

Xingyue child, tears in their eyes: no please... i don't want to go to the shackling prison... i'll be good i promise...

???: You really are obnoxious. You're just like your father, and will also end up a criminal in the shackling prison, forgotten by everyone.

Xingyue child, falling to their knees: no, no please, please...

___

Xingyue child, running up to jing yuan: Uncle! Uncle...

Jing yuan, grieving: ...what do you want.

Xingyue child: i need your help, uncle, help me please...

Jing yuan: don't call me that... i don't have time for you.

Xingyue child: but... they're bad to me, they-

Jing yuan: I CAN'T SEE YOU RIGHT NOW! GET LOST [XINGYUE]!

___

Xingyue child, trembling: c, can i see auntie- i mean, can you tell jingliu her niece is here?

Cloud knights: niece? now is not a good time. I'd suggest you speak with her when you next meet her.

Xingyue child: b, but, if you'd just tell her-

Cloud knights: listen. Now is REALLY not a good time. I'll let her know her "niece" came here.

Xingyue child: o, okay... thank you...

___

Preceptor: oh, you poor thing. All alone... i'm sure you're SO scared...

Xingyue child: w-well...

Preceptor, smiling: ...how would you like to visit your father? Wouldn't that cheer you up?

Xingyue child, excited: c, can i? Really?

Preceptor, grinning ever wider: of course. Let's get you cleaned and dressed nicely, and i'm sure your father will be elated to see you...

___

Preceptor, grinning: guess what kind of surprise i brought for you today, your ever-dying highness.

Dan feng, chained up, deadpan: i'm sure you thought up another fun way to torture me before my "demise".

Preceptor: oh my! Wether or not that maybe true, you shouldn't use such language in front of children... don't you think?

Dan feng: ...what? What do you mean? ...you didn't-

Preceptor, euphoric: i've brought dear [xingyue] because she seemed so lonely! Come in dear!

Dan feng, panicked: no-

Xingyue child, skipping in: father! I m-

Dan feng: DON'T! [XINGYUE], DON'T LOOK AT ME!

Xingyue child, freezes up, stares at the ground: i... i missed you...

Dan feng, conflicted: ...i didn't.

Xingyue child: um, fa-

Dan feng: don't call me that. ...I thought i was finally rid of you.

Xingyue child: what, ...what does that mean.

Dan feng, close to tears: ...you don't seem to understand, let me be honest... *sighs* you... i only kept you around because of yingxing. If you're not with him... you don't need to bother showing your face. Get lost.

Xingyue child: but-

Dan feng, coldly: this is my last warning. Nobody will miss you, and i'm already convicted. One more crime won't make a difference.

Preceptor, gleefully: oh, so cold, your highness. Then, how about i discard this thing on the side of a road?

Dan feng: do as you will.

___

Xingyue child: w-wait, just tell me something. Do you know where my- where yingxing is?

Preceptor: hm? Oh, i've heard he's having a lot of fun on his own. It seems your precious auntie is taking her frustrations out on him. Killing him over and over again... *grins* and he doesn't have the luxury of dying.

Xingyue child, wide-eyed: w-what? No that can't be! You're lying to me!

Preceptor: then why don't you ask her yourself? Oh, that's right, she refused to see you didn't she?

Xingyue: she... she didn't refuse... she's just busy...

Preceptor: that's not wrong... face it. If she'd wanted to see you, she would've told the cloud knights to let you in, don't you think?

Xingyue: bu... but...

___

Cloud knights: *sigh* listen. She didn't have the time yet. How about you wait for her to reach out-?

Xingyue child: then, what about my dad? Yingxing is here, isn't he?

Cloud knights: -? Uhh...

Jingliu, moving around a corner: who told you that?

Xingyue child: the preceptors told me!

Jingliu: listen. I'll say it just once. I don't want to see you here again- and yingxing will not meet with you either. Go home.

Xingyue child: but-

Jingliu: am i speaking too quiet? Or did i stutter? Did i just say, i WON'T repeat myself?

Cloud knights: ...you did.

Jingliu: get lost, [xingyue].

___

Dan heng, carrying xingyue child: you mean to tell me. Every single one of you told [xingyue] to get lost. And not a single one of you checked to make sure if they were in serious danger?

Jing yuan: it's... not that simple... we were... all, kind of... grieving... of course i'm sorry-

Dan heng: you're really lucky that me and dan feng are two separate people. He would've kicked your asses off the luofu. AT LEAST.

Jingliu, sitting in and facing the corner: i only did what was asked.

Dan heng: and then you repeatedly killed his husband. I bet he'd have been thrilled.

Xingyue child: i'm sorry...

Dan heng: stop apologizing it's not your fault. Seriously, people, [xingyue] was his baby, weren't they? You knew, no matter what he said, he loved this child!

Blade: ...i remember none of this and am therefore not responsible.

Dan heng: yes i know this and i love you. Back to the point-

___

Yanqing: i thought vidyadhara can't have kids.

Xingyue child: how old are you?

Yanqing: 14?

Xingyue child: the high elder can. Once per incarnation they can... hmm... create an egg.

Yanqing: literally how though.

Xingyue child: like everyone else i suppose. Uh. Vidyadhara magic. Maid costumes. And, lots of sweat?

Yanqing: ...are you worried wether or not i know about sex?

Xingyue child: oh thank god. Yeah, they had sex and dan feng laid an egg.

Yanqing: ...an egg???

Xingyue child: ...it's complicated.

_____

:P

[petri808]

7/29/23 Fears prompt @allaboutnalu for Nalu Week 2023

Levy gently places her hand over her best friends, coaxing her to relax. “Try not to worry and have a little fun tonight Lucy, we’re celebrating your freedom.” The two women are at their favorite bar to drown their stress in alcohol, music, and maybe some eye-candy but who’s gonna snitch? It is a comfortable place that they’ve been coming to since their college years, and since they know some of the employees, they even get drinks for free sometimes.

“I can’t help it,” Lucy sighs. “Everything’s still so fresh,” she absentmindedly reaches up and touches her left cheek below her eye where it was punched a week ago. Thankfully, the bruising has gone down and it’s just tender still. This is the first time in probably a year that she’s been to this bar or really spent the night out just with her girlfriends because of her ex’s controlling behaviors. “Dan just won’t leave me alone. I’ve even seen him driving past my job or home like he’s keeping tabs.”

Lucy Heartfilia has just gotten out of an abusive relationship with her ex-boyfriend Dan. It started out like so many domestic abuse situations where they are perfect gentlemen, sweet talking, and romantic, but slowly and surely the psychological manipulation began. Guilt-tripping her when she wanted to hang out with her friends or visit her own family. Making excuses for why he wanted to drive her to and from work. Throwing tantrums when he didn’t get his way, verbally berating, or making rude comments about her appearance only to switch gears and be extremely apologetic. Dan would tell her he’d commit suicide if she left him, and so the guilt also kept her from leaving for fear that he might actually go through with it. Of course, it’s all a trap, to lure her back in emotionally and make her feel like things will get better.

It was always that hope of change that she hung onto as the cycle repeated itself again and again. Abuse and repentance. But there’s only so much someone can take, and thankfully for Lucy she has the support of a best friend that will not let her fall. Yeah, it’s great to be free, but there is always the sense of fear and dread when she must walk outside alone, like when she’s leaving her apartment building or office, or even shopping at the store. What if Dan makes good on his threats? She’s never been such a nervous person before that it’s sad how one bad relationship can leave a person tainted for the rest of their lives.

“Did you go to the court house to apply for the restraining order?” Levy queries.

“I did.” Lucy responds. “The process server is supposed to serve him tomorrow.”

“Good,” Levy responds with an approving nod. “Then if that bastard comes near you, the cops can throw him in jail!” She looks around to see if the server’s nearby before standing up. “I’m gonna run to the restroom, if the server comes by can you order me another drink?”

“Yeah, sure,” Lucy smiles. “I’ll make sure to.”

With the music an even tempo of soft alternative and pop, nothing to dance or too lively, it lulls the listeners into a pleasant mood. Lucy really misses coming to this ambient atmosphere after a hard week of pursuing and writing articles instead of going home to an unhappy relationship. If only… Her eyes narrow in towards the front entrance, widening in a flash as she sees Dan step through the threshold.

“Shit!” She grits her teeth and scoots down in the booth. “I knew it!” Lucy just knew he’d likely come looking for her since he knew this is a favorite hang out spot.

Lucy scans the room, eyes flitting around for a way to avoid being caught by him. She can’t get to the front door because it’ll take stepping into the open for him to grab her, and she rather not get trapped in the restrooms... Maybe, she keys onto the bar counter… maybe if she can get to the bartender she’ll at least have an ally to help her. Using the columns and darker areas along the walls, Lucy weaves through other patrons towards the bar counter.

“Lucy!”

Her body stiffens at the familiar angry voice and cringes when she sees Dan yelling and waving frantically while he picks up his pace. No, no, no! As he pushes through the crowd, Lucy sprints the final few feet and grabs onto the first guy sitting alone at the counter. Pink-hair, taller and fit wearing a nice buttons down business shirt and slacks like he just got here from an office. Under other circumstance she’d be ogling the guy not crashing his evening. “Hey babe!” She weaves her arm around his solid bicep. “Sorry I’m late!” Lucy leans close and whispers through a gritted smile, her eyes desperately focused and appealing. “Please play along!”

Just as Dan reaches them, the male who’s eyes at first startles from the intrusion, quickly catches the hint and pulls Lucy in, planting a kiss on her cheek, and all the while side-eyeing the other male. “It’s fine baby, I just got here too.”

“What the fuck!” Dan forcefully grabs the strangers shoulder and pushes while reaching for Lucy’s arm, but the stranger sweeps Lucy aside out of Dan’s way, further enraging him.

Placing Lucy behind him, the stranger stands up from the bar stool and holds his hand up to Dan’s chest without actually touching him. “What the fuck is right!” The pink-haired male menacingly narrows his gaze. “I suggest you back off buddy, I don’t give a damn who you are, but the lady clearly doesn’t want anything to do with you!”

“This ain’t your problem, asshole, she’s my girlfriend!” Dan spits back.

“No, I’m not!” Lucy screams as tears trickle down her cheeks. “You abusive bastard, I’ve got a restraining order on you so leave me alone! We’re done!”

Dan ignores both their statements and makes another lunge to reach for Lucy, but the stranger open palm pushes at Dan’s chest, forcing him to stagger back a foot or two. “Leave!” The stranger snaps, growling his words. “She’s my girl now, and if you keep harassing her I’ll make you sorry!”

At the strangers confirmatory words, Dan roars and lunges at the man who sidesteps and retaliates with an uppercut to his stomach, knocking the wind out of Dan who crumples to the floor coughing. Just as Dan tries to get to his knees, the bouncers are now there and grab him by his shoulders, one on each side they start pulling him away as he continues to shout profanities.

It’s over.

Lucy slumps against the bar top, leaning on it to stop from falling as the adrenaline rushing through her body begins to wane. “Thank you,” the words trickle out in a soft tone laced with held back tears. “Thank you sir, thank you so much,” Lucy repeats over and over.

“Lu!” Levy also finally manages to break through the gathered crowd and rushes to her friends side, pulling the blonde into a tight hug. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t here!”

“It’s over, Levy,” Lucy gently sobs a mixture of elated relief. “Thanks to this nice man here.” Now that she can breathe easier, she realizes this stranger is even cuter than she originally noticed. He has gorgeous green eyes that sparkle in the disco-type lights panning the room. The man’s smile also conveys a happy lightness that pulls you in deeper and wanting for more. She feels a bit of warmth brewing over her cheeks, but could anyone blame her after such a harrowing save by this hero?

Levy turns to the stranger while still holding her friend. “I’m Levy, and this is my bestie Lucy.” Her head tips to the side and eyes flit to the front door to accentuate the who. “That guy’s been stalking my friend, so thank you so much for helping her! He might’ve kidnapped her if he got to her.”

The stranger smiles. “It’s nice to meet you both, and don’t worry, I’m happy to help out a pretty lady in need. I’ve dealt with a lot of dumbasses over the years, so I’m used to it.”

“I bet,” Levy chuckles. “It’s a nice reminder that good guys still exist.”

Here they are chatting like old friends yet they don’t even know his name. Lucy pulls away from Levy to finish wiping away the remaining tears and clean herself up. “So, what’s you name sir?” She finally smiles genuinely. “Is there anything I can do for you, perhaps buy you a drink to thank you?”

The man pulls out a card holder and hands Lucy a business card. “Detective Natsu Dragneel at your service,” he smiles and winks. “A drink is fine, but what I’d really like is your number and to take you out to dinner if you’re up for it.”

A surprised gasp lets out as Levy looks to see Lucy’s face turning cherry red. Having known each other for years, she knew exactly what her best friend is thinking. “Yes!” Levy squeals while pushing Lucy closer to the man. “She’d love to!”

“Levy!”

[rembytem]

Dan’s First Full Moon

Content warning for:

-graphic violence

-blood

-animal violence

-death

Kevin triple-checks his inventory and runs through anything he might potentially need as well. As the full moon approached, Kevin anxiously demanded he pick Dan up for his friend’s first transformation. He felt and still feels incredibly responsible for Dan becoming a bitten werewolf so he’s going to do everything in his power to keep Dan safe from himself.

They had been talking after Dan’s impromptu hospital visit about the wonderful and scary new changes his body will go through. Kevin joked that it felt like explaining puberty except with more teeth and fur in the hopes it would lighten the mood. Thankfully, Dan replied with another joke. Kevin warned Dan of the sensitivity to light, sound, and smell as his eyes, ears, and nose adjust to the lycanthropy. His nose especially will make it hard to be outside because of the onslaught of new smells all at once.

“Sometimes you’ll feel really lonely. That’s normal so don’t be afraid to reach out to friends and family. That’s the wolf in you trying to find comfort in a pack,” Kevin explained on a call one night. “Next time you visit, I’ll teach you about pack life and we can howl together to strengthen pack bond. If you don’t mind that I consider you part of my pack that is,” Kevin feels embarrassed for suggesting it but making a pack with Dan will ease the new werewolf’s loneliness. If Dan decides to have different packmates that don’t include Kevin, he doesn’t think he’d mind that too much. Kevin was the one who failed to protect Dan after all. Why would he want someone weak in his pack?

*        *        *        *        *        *        *        *        *        *        *        *        *        *

Kevin drove to Dan’s and picked him up in the afternoon since the drive to the forest where Kevin normally shifts is rather far. The drive is so tense Kevin is worried Dan might snap from the pressure. His hands are clenched into fists so tightly Dan’s knuckles are white. Dan finally breaks the silence, Kevin pretending not to hear Dan’s heartbeat thrumming in his chest.

“Is this normal? To feel so tense and so tired?” Dan asks softly.

“Yeah, especially for your first shift,” Kevin replies. “It’s probably going to be the most uncomfortable you’ll feel.” Dan grumbles at that. The sound almost becomes a growl, which Kevin picks up on. Silence stretches between them until Dan seems to steel himself.

“What’s it like for you when you shift on a full moon?” Dan asks. He shifts his gaze from the road so he can look at Kevin. Kevin briefly matches Dan’s gaze but keeps his posture relaxed so Dan’s lupine instincts don’t take this as a challenge. He doesn’t want to appear threatening.

“Since I was born a werewolf, I technically don't have to shift on the full moon but it hurts when I don’t. Kinda like I worked out super hard the day before so my muscles are super achy and sore. Actually shifting? I’ve been doing it so much I barely feel it. But the other bitten werewolves I’ve met say their first shift hurts a lot because it takes the longest,” Kevin admits. “Sorry, that’s not very helpful.” He offers Dan a weak smile. Dan returns the smile.

“It’s okay. I’m just a bit anxious about it. You’ve done this before right?” Dan asks worriedly.

“Of course! I’ve told you before; I come from a family of born werewolves who take care of freshly bitten werewolves and show them how to wolf,” Kevin assures.

“What would the ideal scenario be tonight?” Dan asks as he plays with the hem of his jacket. Kevin flashes his eyes up to the sky before flicking them back down to the road. He tightens his grip on the wheel.

“You don’t immediately see me as a threat and we can run in the woods together. But that’s only happened a handful of times of the tens of bitten werewolves we’ve helped. Most of the time, we’ve had to tie them up so they don’t attack humans. We typically put muzzles on bitten werewolves after they shift in case they get loose and try to bite someone.” Dan visibly wilts at that to the point Kevin could practically smell his apprehension.

“You’ll stop me before I get loose, right?” Dan asks, voice shaky. Kevin spares a glance from the road and makes eye contact and Dan catches his breath. Kevin’s expression is resolute and probably the most somber Dan’s ever seen him.

“On my life, I’ll stop you,” Kevin promises. Something in Dan’s chest loosens and he finds himself sighing with relief, grateful that Kevin will protect others from him. Dan’s eyes are glassy as he smiles weakly at Kevin.

“Thank you Kevin,” Dan says softly. The rest drive of the drive is spent in silence except for the sound of Dan’s heart beating, albeit slower than earlier. It feels all too long and too fast as they race the setting sun to the forest. By the time they’ve reached the woods, the sun has completely sunk below the horizon. Kevin exits the driver’s seat pops the trunk open. The boxes of supplies he brought greet him, the silver chains sitting on top, front and center. Slipping on a pair of leather gloves, he takes the silver chains and lock and wraps them around the trunk of a large tree. Kevin can feel Dan’s eyes watching him intensely. He tries not to shiver. Kevin then pulls out a collar and muzzle from the box and puts them into the pocket in his hoodie. They were specially made by born werewolves so they’re woven with silver threads. Because it’s only thread, the collar and muzzle can still break but it’ll just take a lot longer. It also won’t burn as badly as pure silver like the chains. Kevin shuts the trunk door and just finishes attaching the collar to the chain when a sharp gasp from the passenger seat brings Kevin’s attention back to Dan as he spills from the car onto the grass.

“Shit,” Kevin curses as he rushes to Dan’s side. The moon is just barely filtering through the trees but it’s enough to spur Dan’s transformation. Dan cries out and his hand reaches out desperately so Kevin grasps it firmly. He doesn’t care that Dan his gripping it too tightly, using his werewolf strength unintentionally. He needs to be strong for Dan. He needs to be here for Dan. Dan’s body curls in on itself as his bones start rearranging themselves, cracking and mending in a cacophony of pain. He howls in agony as he squeezes Kevin’s hand, fresh claws digging into his skin. Dan’s face elongates into the muzzle of a wolf’s as his teeth become fangs that pick up the light of the moon. He’s panting heavily through the entire transformation, which Kevin chooses to see as a good thing. Blood seeps from Dan’s gums while his jaws were clenched from the pain. Dan’s snout is long for a wolf and Kevin can’t help but empathize with how it must have felt like an agonizing eternity during the shift. Kevin runs his fingers through Dan’s hair to soothe him, if only a little. Dark brown, wavy fur soon covers Dan’s whole body and he has to let go of Kevin’s hand as his hands turn into paws. A tail sprouts slowly from the base of Dan’s spine before it’s covered in fluffy fur.

Kevin steps back as Dan finishes his transformation with a final whimpering howl and collapses onto his side. It took a lot less time than bitten werewolf transformations he’s overseen in the past but it leaves him wary. He stays crouched and still as Dan catches his breath. Then, Dan slowly gets to his feet and sniffs the air. Now that Dan’s standing, Kevin can see he’s not dissimilar from how he is as a human. Everything about his wolf form is long and lithe. Kevin reminds himself not to underestimate Dan because he’s small and skinny as a wolf. But he makes a mental note to still be careful with Dan because of his lung.

Once Dan’s breathing evens out, his eyes bore straight into Kevin. Kevin inhales sharply when Dan makes eye contact. Dan’s eyes are fully reflecting the moon: his pupils a bright yellow while his irises are their normal pale blue. Before Dan can move, Kevin lunges at him and grabs his scruff with one hand and wraps his other arm around Dan’s head. Dan snarls and tries to free himself from Kevin’s grasp, snapping his jaws at the air. His shoulder is immediately complaining from the position but Kevin drags Dan to the collar attached to the silver chains. He lets go of the hand holding Dan’s scruff and snatches the collar from the ground, quickly wrestling Dan to the ground. Kevin holds one knee against Dan’s head and the other against Dan’s shoulder as he clips the collar around the werewolf’s neck. Now that Dan is chained to the tree, Kevin gets off of him and hastily retreats. Dan snaps at his heels only to be pulled back by the chain. He snarls at Kevin, saliva dripping from his fangs. Kevin sighs, resting against the side of his car. At least his lung doesn’t seem bothered from Kevin pinning Dan down.

“I’ll put the harness on you later so you don’t end up choking because of the collar,” Kevin tells Dan. His words don’t have any effect, which is expected. “I really hope I don’t have to hurt you. I’d rather not need to shift in order to stop you from killing someone.” Dan bares his teeth at Kevin before biting his chains. “No Dan, stop!” Kevin cries, leaping up from his reclined position as the silver burns Dan’s mouth. Dan, seeing Kevin rushing at him, growls and goes to bite him. Kevin throws his arm between him and Dan as teeth sink into his flesh. Kevin clenches his jaw so as not to cry out and further aggravate Dan. He uses his free hand to wrench Dan’s fangs from his arm but to no avail. Dan doesn’t want to let go. Kevin stares into Dan’s empty eyes, trying to see some semblance of him in there but he’s not there. So Kevin patiently waits for Dan to tire, ignoring the pain in his shoulder and arm.

“Let go, Dan,” Kevin commands. Dan does not listen or acknowledge that Kevin is speaking. He keeps staring into Kevin’s eyes. So Kevin decides to switch tactics. He throws his head back and howls, low and melodic. Dan freezes, his hold on Kevin’s arm loosening slightly. It’s just enough for Kevin to pry his jaws open and swiftly pull the muzzle from his pocket and slip it over Dan’s face. By the time Dan can react, the muzzle is securely fastened. Dan spits and growls, thrashing his head around to try and shake the muzzle off. Kevin steps back and exhales, finally taking the time to inspect his injury. He rolls the sleeve of his hoodie up and winces. It’s going to be a messy heal but it will heal nonetheless. Kevin slides the sleeve back down, the throbbing pain in his shoulder making itself known. He watches as Dan tries desperately to get the muzzle off, now fully ignoring the chain. Dan switches from whipping his head back and forth to rubbing his face against the ground and pushing at the muzzle with his paws. Thankfully for Kevin, Dan’s snout is longer than most werewolves’ so the muzzle won’t be going anywhere.

Kevin groans and sinks down, resting his back against his car. He takes a deep breath before running his hand down his face, sparing a glance at Dan. The bitten werewolf has stopped moving and is now staring at Kevin unblinkingly, his head somewhat bowed. Kevin huffs a chuckle before howling again, albeit weaker than last time. Dan’s head perks up as he watches Kevin howl. Kevin tries again, listening for Dan to make any sound with him. What he doesn’t expect is Dan to attempt to howl too but it’s a horrible screaming sound instead. Kevin can’t help but laugh at Dan’s pitiful howl but maybe it’s because of the muzzle. Kevin watches Dan try to howl again but he still can’t seem to figure it out.

“You’ll get it one day,” Kevin promises. “When you have a pack of your own, you’ll be howling properly in no time.” Dan, surprisingly, tilts his head at that. Kevin chuckles. “I’m assuming you’ll make your own pack after all. I’m just temporary pack since I’m the one that got you in this mess in the first place,” Kevin rambles, wincing as pain shoots up his arm again. Dan regards Kevin dubiously before pacing around as far as the chain will let him. “I know you’re restless but I can’t let you off the chain,” Kevin apologizes. Dan snorts at that and keeps pacing around. Kevin smiles and shakes his head at Dan before slowly getting up. He might as well bandage his arm since he doesn’t think he needs to shift tonight. It seems like Dan isn’t particularly bloodthirsty anymore.

Kevin removes his leather gloves and takes one of the small bottles of water he packed and cleans his arm with it. He takes the rest of the water and pours it into a bowl for Dan, placing it down where Dan can reach it. Kevin doesn’t turn his back on Dan, instead, he slowly backs up while watching the wolf. Dan approaches the bowl of water, giving it a precursory sniff before attempting to drink from it. Kevin smiles to himself before going back to bandaging his arm. With his bite wound sufficiently cleaned and dressed now, Kevin lowers his sleeve over the bandages and reclines against the side of his car with a sigh. His shoulder pain is ever present now but he doesn’t want to take any painkillers yet. Suddenly, Dan starts growling, pulling the chain taut with so much force that it shakes the tree it’s attached to. Kevin is immediately on guard but when he sees that Dan isn’t directing his aggression towards him, he follows Dan’s gaze. There’s a figure wearing dark camouflage clothing and night vision goggles. It isn’t until Kevin hears the click that he puts it together. Without missing a beat, Kevin barrels into Dan, knocking him over as he hears a bullet wiz over his back. Dan, already agitated, tries to sink his teeth into Kevin but the muzzle stops him. He snarls and scratches at Kevin to get him off and away from him instead. Dan shoves Kevin off of him with his hind paws, knocking the wind from his lungs. Dan is immediately pinning Kevin down by his shoulders, causing Kevin to cry out. There’s the sound of cocking a gun.

“Don’t shoot him! Please, don’t shoot!” Kevin shouts to the camouflaged figure. “He’s tied up and can’t bite anyone, please don’t shoot him!” The figure doesn’t respond, keeping their aim steady. Dan looms over Kevin with his teeth bared and ready to strike. The stranger must have taken a step forward to “help” Kevin because there’s a snap of a twig and Dan lunges for Kevin. Except the muzzle keeps his jaws shut and Dan ends up slamming his nose into Kevin’s eye. It would have been funny if not for the imminent danger. Kevin, taking this as a window of opportunity, grabs Dan by the scruff and rolls them both over so that Kevin is freed from being pinned. Using the spin’s momentum, Kevin shoves Dan away from him and hobbles over to the figure as he blinks the pain from his eye. Dan writhes and pulls against the chain violently to try and get to either of them. Kevin stays crouched and puts a hand to his shoulder. He should have taken the painkillers earlier.

“Are you one too?” the figure asks. Kevin’s head shoots up in alarm.

“No! Just my friend! I offered to help him with his transformation tonight!” Kevin lies. The stranger’s gaze drifts to Kevin’s arm where the sleeve is still bloody.

“Did he bite you?” the figure asks, taking a step towards Kevin. Dan shrieks, the chain holding him at bay rattling violently.

“No, he just scratched me,” Kevin lies again. They contemplate Kevin’s answers before turning their gun back on Dan.

“I’m doing you a favor, kid,” the stranger says before they pull the trigger. Time slows as Kevin propels himself forward, feeling his body shift in mid-air. Outstretched hands become claws. His teeth sharpen in his open jaws as his scream becomes a howl. While the night vision goggles and mask cover the stranger’s face, Kevin can smell the shock and fear burst from them as he sinks his fangs into their neck. Kevin gives the stranger a swift death. He hates how the blood floods his mouth. It tastes of the stranger’s life flashing before their eyes. He then turns his attention to Dan who appears unharmed. Dan doesn’t smell of gunpowder or blood. In fact, there is a neat bullet hole in the ground a little ways past where Dan is standing. Kevin limps over and digs up the bullet and the bullet from earlier, taking them in his teeth delicately before depositing them next to his car. Once the bullets are accounted for, Kevin makes his way over to Dan to double-check that he’s fine. Kevin sniffs Dan all over and deems him perfectly fine. Kevin then gives Dan a lick on the head before limping over to the corpse. Kevin paws at the jacket they’re wearing and reveals several silver knives, silver bullets, and a vial of dried wolfsbane. Werewolf hunter.  Kevin huffs and shakes his head. What a mess. He grabs the corpse by the collar and drags it away from Dan. If someone comes looking for whoever this was, Kevin doesn’t want them finding Dan.

Kevin walks back, in human form, to where he chained Dan to the tree and is pleasantly surprised to see that Dan is relatively calm. Of course, his eyes were staring straight in Kevin’s direction before he even saw him. “Did ye have a good time out here alone?” Kevin asks lightheartedly. Dan doesn’t respond at all but Kevin slowly notices all the scuffs on the ground. Dan must have tried to chase things but the chain kept him from pursuing.

“We should probably leave,” Kevin mutters. He picks up the silver bullets barehanded, hissing from the contact, and slides them into his pocket. He’ll stash them away later. Kevin checks his phone for the time and the screen informs him it’s an hour or two from dawn. Perfect. Kevin finally takes some painkillers for his shoulder. Thankfully his lycanthropy doesn’t let his injury get too bad but it can only do so much. He hasn’t seen many werewolves heal back 100% after being hit by a car, human form or not.

Kevin slips his leather gloves back on as he approaches Dan. “We’re going for a trip, Dan,” Kevin explains briefly as he unlocks the chain from the tree. He grips the end tightly, anticipating that Dan would try and chase after something as soon as he was free. Dan predictably starts pulling but he’s pulling in the direction Kevin dragged the body away. “No no no, we’re not going over there,” Kevin chides hurriedly as he starts leading Dan towards the car instead. It’s a struggle since Dan does not seem to want to get into the car so Kevin finally gives in and picks Dan up and manhandles him into the car and shuts the door.

“Oh feck, seatbelts,” Kevin sighs. He checks the trunk for if he brought the harness specifically for buckling into a seatbelt and after digging through the boxes, he remembers he has the harness in his hoodie pocket. He closes the trunk door and makes his way to the backseat. He opens it slowly and is ready for when Dan tries to bolt out but Kevin bodily blocks him and attempts to quickly get the harness onto the bitten werewolf. “Sorry Dan, this is mildly inconvenient,” Kevin apologizes as Dan snarls and tries to bite him as Kevin wrestles the harness onto Dan. Now that Dan is harnessed up and clipped to the seatbelt, Kevin doesn’t feel as nervous that Dan is immediately going to try and maul him while he’s driving. He double-checks that he’s not leaving any physical evidence of their stay or the scuffle they had before getting into the driver’s seat. Kevin backs out of the woods and makes a mental note not to come back here for a few months. He grips the wheel and takes a shuddering breath as the gravity of the situation sinks in. He killed a human with his own fangs. He can still taste their blood in his mouth. He hasn’t had to kill a werewolf hunter in a long time. Before he can distract himself too much, Kevin lets himself sob once before refocusing in the road. He feels tears streaming over his cheeks but he can’t bring himself to wipe them away. Shifting and snuffling in the backseat brings Kevin’s eyes to the rearview mirror. Dan is leaning as far forward as the seatbelt will allow him with his long nose twitching in Kevin’s direction. His glowing eyes are wide and curious.

“Aw, are ye worried about me Dan?” Kevin chuckles, though his voice is a bit strained. Dan tilts his head and whines softly. Kevin sniffles a bit before looking back at the road. “We’ll be at my place soon. I just have to drive around a bit more in case we’re being followed,” Kevin assures Dan. He hears Dan huff at him before settling back down. It takes a little longer than Kevin would have liked but he makes it back to his house without incident. He heaves himself out of the car and shuffles over to the back seat door to let Dan out. Dan growls at him while he unbuckles his seatbelt but he doesn’t rush out of the car like Kevin though he would. Rather, he patiently allows Kevin to lead him to the house. Kevin fumbles with his keys but he gets them inside. He locks the door and the deadbolt before stumbling to his bedroom. He unclips the silver chain from Dan’s collar and throws it into the corner of his room, discarding his leather gloves promptly afterward.

Now that they’re not in mortal danger, Kevin can truly take in Dan’s wolf form. Somehow, his fur on the top of his head resembles his bangs. Dan is fairly tall for a wolf too, his head reaching just below Kevin’s chest. But if Dan stood up on his hind legs, he would certainly be taller than Kevin. Dan stares back at Kevin during this scrutiny, his pupils still pale like the moon. Kevin ruffles Dan’s fur before flopping onto his bed. He nearly jumps out of his skin when he feels the bed dip and Dan’s long, muzzled nose is right in his face.

“Oh feck, you scared me Dan!” Kevin laughs as he pets Dan’s face. He grabs Dan’s long nose and gives it a gentle shake. Dan snarls lightly so Kevin lets his nose go and sighs. Dan, with the muzzle on, manages to bite a bit of Kevin’s sweater and shake it vigorously until it slips from his teeth. He then sniffs all over Kevin, his nose poking Kevin while he smells him. When Dan pokes Kevin’s injured arm, he curls his nose away from it and bares his teeth. “Ah, now there’s no need for that. You’re the one that did that to me,” Kevin chides. He sits up, making his back crack in the process, and pulls the sweater off over his head with a groan. His fecking shoulder. Kevin inspects his bandaged wound and unwraps it. It healed over pretty well, the punctures in his skin have already closed up leaving pink indentations. Dan sniffs it, his wet nose cool against Kevin’s skin. “See? Good as new!” Kevin assures. Dan eyes him dubiously but he settles down on Kevin’s bed, nosing the pillows innocently. “Alright, the sun’s gonna come up soon so let’s get some sleep before then,” Kevin says as he lays back down, feeling himself slip into unconsciousness.

Kevin’s not sure what time it is when he wakes up but the sound of bones cracking and whimpering tells him it’s dawn. He turns his head and sees Dan’s lupine face scrunched in agony as he paces around on the bed panting anxiously. Eventually, he can’t stand anymore and collapses onto the bed and into himself like a dying spider. Kevin reaches out and pets Dan’s head, knowing he can’t do much else to comfort the bitten werewolf as he shifts back. The fur slowly recedes until it’s just a fluffy mess on the top of Dan’s head. His front paws elongate and his claws recede to his human fingers. The long snout confined to the muzzle shrinks away until the muzzle is holding nothing but empty space. A formerly trembling tail disappears back into Dan’s spine. Kevin drapes the blanket they’re on top of over Dan as he finishes shifting back to a human, unsure if he’ll still have his clothes on. Dan’s hands find the blanket and he clenches them tightly as he catches his breath from the transformation. Kevin waits patiently for Dan to recover mentally. It doesn’t take long, maybe Dan heard Kevin moving around because he opens his eyes and they immediately go to the muzzle loosely wrapped around his head.

“What in the hell am I wearing?” Dan croaks. Kevin chuckles but he makes no move to pull it off Dan. Dan doesn’t seem to have the energy to remove it either.

“A muzzle. Doesn’t quite fit you this way,” Kevin replies. “Because of that, you didn't bite anyone.” Dan sits up and sighs with relief until he sees Kevin’s bare arms.

“Then what’s that?” he asks, pointing to the pink scarring on Kevin’s arm. Kevin lifts up the previously injured arm just enough to see how well it’s healed.

“Oh, yeah, I’m not anyone,” Kevin says nonchalantly. Dan scoffs and holds Kevin’s arm gingerly.

“I bit you,” Dan states, his voice shaking slightly.

“It’s okay, Dan. Don’t beat yourself up about it. Remember, I’m a werewolf too,” Kevin says softly. “I knew what I was getting into last night.” Dan runs his fingers over the indentations from the bite marks.

“Did it hurt when I bit you?” Dan asks.

“Nah, I’ve been bit worse before,” Kevin replies, half telling the truth. Dan buys the half lie and sets Kevin’s arm back down.

“What happened last night?” Dan whispers, eyes already glassy. He holds the blanket tighter around himself. Kevin tries to sit up but can barely get his shoulders off the bed before his aches and pains force him back down. He exhales in frustration before trying again. This time, Dan helps him upright, which he thanks him for.

“Well, you certainly wore me out. Getting that muzzle on you wasn’t easy,” Kevin says lightheartedly. “But chaining you to a tree was. By the way, you still have the collar and harness on too.” Dan raises his hands to his neck where he finds the collar, much too big on him. He unclips everything and holds them delicately in his hands. Dan looks up at Kevin to continue speaking, hands starting to tremble.

“But there’s more that happened. I remember hearing gunshots,” Dan whimpers. Kevin nods.

“A werewolf hunter tried to kill you last night,” Kevin states. “They failed, obviously.” Dan starts frantically checking himself and the bed for any bloody trails or grazes or anything and upon finding nothing, he looks at Kevin expectantly. Kevin takes a shuddering breath before saying, “I killed them, Dan. To protect you I went for their throat because I thought I’d fail you twice.” Kevin then covers his face with a hand to hide his tears. Dan doesn’t need to see him break down right now. Thin fingers wrap around his hand and slowly lower it from his face. Dan’s brows are furrowed but his eyes are clear and determined.

“I’m sorry you had to make that decision but I am grateful you did,” Dan says gently, still holding Kevin’s hand in his. “I don’t hold that against you. You haven’t failed me.” Dan doesn’t expect Kevin to lean forward heavily and practically slump against Dan’s body much less in wolf form. The shift is instantaneous and catches Dan off guard from Kevin’s weight. Kevin’s forehead rests underneath Dan’s chin while the rest of his body is nearly flush with Dan. Dan doesn’t quite understand this behavior but he runs his hands over Kevin’s back soothingly. He doesn't comment on how Kevin is shaking in his arms but he does rest his cheek on the top of Kevin’s head. Even though he’s meant to be comforting Kevin, Dan finds himself calming down while petting Kevin.

“Thank you for protecting me, Kevin,” Dan says into Kevin’s fur. Kevin grunts before pulling back and shifting back to his human form. He looks into Dan’s eyes with an expression Dan can’t quite place but Dan feels at ease.

“Of course, Dan,” Kevin replies.

[cartoonygothopossum]

Migration

I first saw a trailer for Migration in the theater where I watched Barbie. From what I understood about the plot, (and perhaps also because it was made by Illumination), I was somewhat interested in seeing the movie. Admittedly, I forgot about the movie, until I saw fan art of it earlier this year. It was then that I realized the movie had already come out last year.

Now that I saw it over five months after its US release, it was a fun, cute movie. Mack, the father mallard, was so fearful and overprotective that he reminded me of Marlin from Finding Nemo. Considering that he told his ducklings a scary story intended as a cautionary tale, I'm starting to wonder whether that story reflected a trauma he experienced in the past. I could kind of understand why Mack would be afraid of the outside world, but I could also sympathize with his mate, Pam, who wanted adventure. I may be an introverted homebody, but even I need to be able to get out of the house to have fun sometimes, especially since I'm now completely dependent on my family for transportation. The sibling rivalry between the ducklings, Dax and Gwen, was amusing to watch. I found it interesting that Mack changed his mind about traveling, only after the weird Uncle Dan told him that he (Mack) could end up alone like him (Dan). As glum as Dan seemed to be, I liked how he seemed to have a soft spot for Gwen.

The mallard family certainly ran into trouble during their journey, but I was pleased to see that they made friends. The herons did look like they might kill the mallards, so I was relieved when the female one, Erin, saved them from a fish. The leader of the pigeon gang, Chump, was quite intimidating for such a tiny bird, but helped lead the mallards to Delroy, a scarlet macaw who knew how to get to the family's intended destination, Jamaica. The white ducks from the duck farm were also quite friendly. They could've convinced the mallards to stay at their farm forever, but thankfully, that didn't happen.

That chef, though, was crazy! It's one thing to be particular about how a dish should turn out, but taking the dish and smashing it against the wall was uncalled for. He seemed like an incredibly tough boss to work for, and considering that he bought the white ducks from the duck farm, I'm guessing he really, really likes cooking ducks. Though it's common for pet birds to be housed in cages, Delroy clearly didn't like being in his cage. I wouldn't be surprised if that chef mostly neglected him. I was happy for Delroy when he was finally freed from captivity. Of course, that wasn't the last we saw of the chef, since he managed to find and capture the birds, except Dax and Gwen, in that motel.

Initially, I was confused as to why Dax was unable to fly by the time the birds reached the motel, but now, I recalled that as the birds were escaping from the chef at the duck farm, he lost some feathers. Thankfully, though, the feathers left behind at the motel enabled him to fly again. How awesome it was when the birds managed to escape from the chef and finally reached Jamaica! Everyone was enjoying themselves there, and Delroy reunited with his family. It was also nice to see the duck family who visited the mallard family's pond again. Now that Mack has gained a love of adventure, I hope he doesn't take it too far!

[landosgirl97]

My Hat- Jake “Hangman” Seresin

A/N: Yes, this was inspired by footloose. The only warnings really are fighting and drinking. This has been in the drafts for a while and I decided to finally post it. ENjoy!

Warnings: Smut, drinking, this is 18+

As Jake “Hangman” Seresin’s best friend, we went almost everywhere together, so when he said the squad was going out for to the Hard Deck where they were haven’t a Honky Tonk night, I wasn’t going to say no. I loved the crew and country line dancing so it was a definite win-win for me. I wore a crop top, my good jeans, and the cowboy boots I bought last time we went to visit Jake’s family. He was in a button up, jeans, boots, and a camel colored Stetson cowboy hat. I tried not to be affected by the small smirk on his face or the toothpick in his mouth as we made out way to Bradley’s Bronco where it was Bradley, Phoenix, Hangman and I. We drove to the bar, Hangman picking the songs to get up “hyped” for the bar. We all wanted to make our way to the dance floor but Jake didn’t want to dance. He wanted to stand, watch and drink for a bit. So I joined Bradley and Phoenix out on the dance floor. We started out with a few easy line dances that we all knew, but thankfully for the more complicated ones, there was someone up front to lead everyone. I noticed Hangman had finished his first beer and started drinking his second when I made my way up to him. “Come dance with me Jake!” I yelled over the music. He scoffs, “I don’t dance.You know that!” I rolled my eyes and grabbed his hat off his head, placing it on mine. He reached for it but I moved away, swinging and swaying my hips to the music, knowing he’d be watching me. Hangman and I were never official, but in our group it was pretty well known that I’m his and he’s mine. You can cut the sexual tension between us with a knife.

I made my way back over to Brad and Nat and finished the dance. We went and got drinks, dancing to a few more before I was approached by another man. “Hey, pretty lady, wanna dance?” I of course nodded my head, snaking my hands around his neck and his landed on my waist. He hand brown hair and brown eyes, he was cute and put together, but not like Hangman. We danced for about half a song until I felt someone’s hand on my shoulder. “Hey man, get your hands off of my girl!” The guy scoffed as Jake turns to me, “you never dance with another man with my hat on! That’s disrespectful. Are we clear?” I just shook my head at him smirking. “Hey, get away from her, she’s dancing with me.” Dave- Dan said. “Well that’s my hat so lay off her,” Jake said. As Jake made a break to grab me, Dan (I think?) took his hand, running it down my back until he squeezed my ass.” “Hey! Hands off!” I said, looking at him. I felt Jake move me behind him as he laid a punch straight into Dan’s face. Dan punched Jake back, knocking him backward and reaching for me again. I went behind him, grabbing a beer bottle off the bar, and shattering it over his thick skull. He immediately flopped down to the ground. Jake looked at my in surprise and grabbed my hand, running us out of the bar with Nat and Bradley close behind. Jake stopped before we got in the car, grabbing both of my cheeks and looking me over. “My little brawler, you ok?” I nod, taking off his hat to hand it back to him, but he shakes his head. “No, sweetheart, it’s yours now. My girl.” The way he said it and looked in my eyes made butterflies erupt in my stomach. “Let’s get back, huh babe?” I asked. He nods his head and we hop into the Bronco and head back to my house, hands intertwined and smiles on our faces.

I unlocked the front door and, being the gentleman he is, he stayed outside. “Jake, you can come in.” He raised an eyebrow at me, “you’re not gonna make me go home?” I shook my head at him. “Not a chance! I know what wearing a mans hat means, so get your cute ass in here and let me take a ride, cowboy.” Jake smirked before quickly sweeping me up and hauling me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes as I held on to his hat, laughing. He shut and locked the door behind us and kicked off his boots before he walked up the stairs to my bedroom. He plopped me on the bed and immediately hovered over me. I let him slide his hands under my shirt, sliding it up and over my head, knocking his hat of of my head. He leaned over me, and grabbed the hat, placing it back on my head. He got back up, pulling his shirt up over his head and unfastening his pants and pulling them down. I watched as his cock snapped up against his stomach. I immediately flipped us over and lined him up with my entrance and sinking down on him. I gasped when he bottomed out, feeling him against my cervix. I used one hand to grab his thigh behind me, the other grabbing the hat on my head, grinding my hips against him. He let out a loud groan at the feeling of hitting against my cervix. He sat up, forcing our bodies together. I wrapped my one arm around his neck as he gripped both of my ass cheeks harshly with his nails digging into the flesh. He helped lead the pace by meeting my hips in short thrusts, his other hand trailing down to rub my clit. “Fuck- Jake.. I-“ He nodded, connecting our lips in a quick, heated kiss before my head fell back and my toes curled. “FUCK!” He moaned, filling me up with his warm cum and letting his head lull down onto my shoulder as we caught our breath. “Well cowgirl.. looks like you’ve earned your title.” I giggled, “save a horse, ride a cowboy, right?!”

[thesoulspulse]

Danny Phantom Randomness (Heartbeat)

Not sure if this has been done before but if not, I have an idea. So I was thinking about how Danny’s human half didn’t survive when Dan was created from his ghost half and Vlad’s combining and thought of this really sad but meaningful moment where Clockwork brought his ghost to the past to let him say goodbye to the friends and family he lost to help his spirit pass on so there wouldn’t be two Danny’s in the same timeline. After all, the existence of half-ghosts themselves is already a paradox but it’s hard to say what’ll happen to Vlad and Danny once they actually DO die. That is, if they even can (plus immortal au’s are fun like that.)

Anyways, the idea here is that after Danny’s ghost manages to say goodbye to his parents, sister, Sam and Tucker, he makes a last minute decision to visit Vlad one more time too even though they were still enemies in the past. Even if he can never say this to the Vlad from his timeline who watched Dan kill him, Danny wants to let Vlad know what happened wasn’t his fault and for better or worse he knows he was trying to help. So Danny shows up at Vlad’s, is met by the usual snarky comments like “finally come to your senses to join me hmm Daniel?” or something to that effect but instead he just hugs Vlad, wishing he could change the future so neither of them had to lose someone important to them in such a horrific way, but knowing he can’t.

Vlad of course suspects something like a Specter Deflector being attached to him like last time so he’s just about to push Danny away when he notices something that makes his blood run cold. Danny...he doesn’t have a heartbeat! Alarmed now Vlad asks Danny if something happened and Danny, who has begun glowing with a warm golden light, smiles sadly and says:

“I wish we had more time but before I leave I just wanted to let you know it wasn’t your fault. In the end, you tried to help without the usual strings attached and I’ll never forget that. So thanks, Vlad, for finally doing what you said you would. Being there for me when I needed it. And in the future, when your second chance finally comes, don’t hesitate to take it because we’ll be waiting for you on the other side...”

Then he vanishes, implying that Danny’s moved on and is reunited with his friends and family who thankfully didn’t become ghosts after the Nasty Burger explosion, and Clockwork resets time in order to make it seem like this conversation never happened. But deep down, Vlad remembers what Danny said to him subconsciously which is why, when a young Danny appears in the future asking for help he uses the Ghost Gauntlets to help him stop Dan from recreating the dark timeline by removing Clockworks time amulet.

What we don’t see is the old and frail Vlad sink into his chair not long after, just barely holding onto life which is fading fast but then he sees a familiar light and a hand reaching out of it towards him. And despite all the mistakes Vlad’s made in his life by saving Danny -and by extension the world- it’s enough to help him make peace with himself and join his Danny in heaven after holding on long enough to give a version of his little badger a second chance to avoid a fate worse than death. That said, I still wish canon Vlad had gotten some kind of redemption arc instead of becoming progressively worse as the show went on but that’s what fanfics are for!

Anyways, hope you enjoyed this little snippet even if it’s kinda jumbled up. Just wanted to get the idea down before I forget since the main point is seeing Danny go out of his way to comfort Vlad and let him know the death of his human self wasn’t his fault. Plus, it’s nice to imagine Future Vlad got to move on peacefully too after making up for his biggest mistake of accidentally creating Dan.

[phanfictioncatalogue]

The Isle of Man (2) Masterlist

part one

2018 (ao3) - outphan

Summary: Dan has a chat with Kath, about his relationship and future with Phil.

amidst the chaos (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: “Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen” -Bobby, age 7

And, Like Putting On Glasses, I Saw the World in Perfect Clarity (ao3) - cactuslester

Summary: Dan thinks this trip to the Isle of Man will be like all the other trips to visit the Lesters. Little does he know, Phil has a 3 carat surprise for him.

A Quiet Coffee Date on IOM (ao3) - ByTheFire

Summary: Dan and Phil go to explore downtown while Kath runs some errands and find a queer coffee shop

Christmas Coming Out (ao3) - FandomFeels17

Summary: He didn't intend to come out to his mum in his future mother in law's kitchen at Christmas... But here he was, doing exactly that.

Deep Breath (ao3) - ahappyphil

Summary: Dan and Phil visit the Isle of Man to finish TABINOF

from the ashes of everything now (ao3) - dizzy

Summary: a series of stories set after Dan and Phil reach Isle of Man, originally posted in the comments of 'in the half light'

home is in the hills (ao3) - watergator

Summary: dan spends christmas with phil's family on the isle of man

(yes this is an actual thing that happened irl im dead)

i’m fine (if you are fine) (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: But the sun is rising now, streaks of orange and gold spread across the candyfloss-coloured sky, shards of light catching in the sea below. Their faces are pink from the climb, and pressed together on the bench the December chill doesn’t seem so bad. They can see for miles from their seat. He doesn’t want to be cynical about everything any more.

[the morning before dan leaves the isle of man for christmas, he thinks about the future]

maybe this christmas (ao3) - blackbirddan

Summary: In all the years they've known each other, Dan and Phil have never been able to spend Christmas Day together. And it's looking like they still can't, even with how much things have changed this year. Unless...

a.k.a. Dan’s family spend Christmas in the Isle of Man.

Written for schnaf as part of the 2019 Phandom Fic Fests Secret Santa exchange. Prompt: Christmas dinner with the family

Mitten (ao3) - yikesola

Summary: Dan really truly thought it was going to take longer to feel normal on the Isle of Man again. He’s changed so much; the world has changed so much.

A fic about knits and rules.

No Man Is An Island (ao3) - strawberrysunflower

Summary: While drunk and desperate to get away from the creatively-stifling hubbub of London, Dan rents a farmhouse on the Isle of Man for four weeks to finish writing his latest book. All he wants is silence. Peace. Solitude.

Then he meets Phil, the farm owners’ dorky, clumsy, stupidly handsome son.

Safe Place (ao3) - ahappyphil

Summary: The Isle of Man is warm and unseasonably sunny, or maybe it’s just Kath. Maybe her maternal glow just radiates off this little island.

Sea Glass (ao3) - kae_karo

Summary: Phil arrives on the Isle of Man to house-sit at his family's cabin while it's repaired and sold. Except the cabin's in far worse shape than expected, and Phil's got to find somewhere else to stay (Phil POV)

Seagulls Screaming (kiss him, kiss him) (ao3) - Allthephils

Summary: Dan goes to the coast with his family and shares a fleeting moment with a boy on a cliff. It’s brief but it’s clear, this is only the beginning.

In another world, this is their origin story.

shiver, but shiver with a friends (ao3) - orphan_account

Summary: it might be cold, but the view of the moon on the black ocean and phil next to him makes it more than worth it.

teach me to breathe again (ao3) - phantasizeit

Summary: Phil reflects on his anxiety while he observes the ocean on the Isle of Man with Dan. This quickly dissolves into playfully chasing each other in the rain.

the brightest shade of sun (i had ever see ) (ao3) - Tarredion

Summary: one dawn on the isle of man can be enough to unite two craving hearts, even if a lot of heartbreaking thoughts are revealed along the way

The Next Chapter (ao3) - wheniamqueenx

Summary: 'Dan is standing on a doorstep just outside of Manchester, it is the twenty first of December and he isn’t supposed to be here. He should be with Phil who has probably has not yet removed himself from the sofa, pyjama pants still softly clinging to his hips.'

or

Dan goes to visit Phil's mum, alone.

these are the places i will always go. (ao3) - commonemergency

Summary: "If it were the last few days on earth where would you want to spend it?" Dan eventually asks, thinking back to that story with Martyn and Phil.

Phil thinks, and then says, "Well I guess it'd be here. With my family and you. What about you?" Or the one where Dan goes with Phil to the Isle of Man and thinks about what family means to him.

Vow (ao3) - Lackless

Summary: Dan and Phil get married

want you so bad i can taste it (ao3) - larasunbetadscribbles

Summary: Protect me from what I want.

Or: Dan and Phil get absurdly drunk and start making out in the middle of a pub, with Martyn and Cornelia coming to rescue them from doing something incredibly stupid.

We Have Each Other (And That’s All We Need) (ao3) - Phanfictionhoe

Summary: Dan and Phil have finished their 2018 tour and are visiting Phil's family on the Isle of Man before they go home. This is supposed to be a nice calm vacation for the two after the stress of the tour, however Phil can't find it in himself to calm down. Dan decides to help him out a little bit...

without twilight or compromise (ao3) - dizzy

Summary: Dan and Phil explore an old bookstore.

[duskwoodgirl4life]

Chapter 15

MC's POV

These last couple of weeks have been such a world wind everything as happened at once Astrid gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. They had decided to call her Hope Richy was over the moon. I don't think I have ever seen him this happy before I can see how much he loves her. Jake and I went to visit Astrid in the hospital and meet Hope. She is so beautiful I must admit it was making me slightly broody but I didn't want to freak Jake out.

Cleo had been spending more time with Alan helping him settle into his house, I could tell she was trying extra hard to make him feel welcome. I still wasn't sure it was a good idea for her getting so close but I didn't say anything at least not yet. I decided I would see how things go before saying anything. If I felt Cleo was going to get her heart broken I would step in.

Jessy is slowly getting better. She can be in the same room as Richy now, I was concerned that they wouldn't be able to be around each other. Things still aren't perfect but they are being adults about the situation which is good. The rest of the group have been coming in everyday to grab a coffee and a slice of their favorite cake. They have all come round to the idea of the coffee shop and they can see how well it's working.

Lilly and Dan have been getting close. They have always liked each other. I'm happy that Dan has found someone who makes him happy. He's been doing so well at the delivery job Cleo and I gave him he is loving life right now. Thomas and Hannah at doing good Thomas proposed and Hannah said yes they are busy organizing an engagement party at the aurora.

Jake on the other hand has been a bit distant lately. I don't know what's got into him. When I ask him what's wrong he just tells me nothing and that everything is fine. I'm worried that he might be having doubts about being with me, sure it was all amazing in the beginning but now I think he's having second thoughts.

Who do I reach out to? I could talk to Cleo but she's so happy with Alan. Jessy is still dealing with what happened with Richy. I could reach out to Dan but I really don't want him to say I told you so. I guess the only option that is left is to confront Jake and make him tell me what's wrong.

After work MC headed home it had been a long day and was grateful for it being the weekend. When she arrived home Jake she overheard Jake on the phone to someone she couldn't quite make out who it was. MC decided to move towards the kitchen where she could hear Jake talking. As she got closer to the kitchen Jake spotted her and ended the call. MC looked at Jake with a puzzled look on her face MC walked towards Jake and stopped in front of him.

MC: Alright Jake what the hell is going on? Why are you acting so fucking weird

Jake: nothing is going on I already told you stop being so paranoid

MC: Me paranoid? You're the one hanging up the phone whenever I walk into a room

Jake: well maybe I wouldn't have to if you didn't keep eavesdropping on my conversations

MC: What the hell is that supposed to mean?

Jake: Your always there listening in to what I'm saying

MC: Well if that's the way you feel then fine I'm out of here.

Before Jake could say anything MC stormed off to the bedroom slamming the door behind her. MC grabbed an overnight bag and started packing, throwing everything she needed into the bag. Once she had finished she grabbed the bag and walked out of the bedroom. Jake saw MC carrying a bag and instantly ran over to her.

Jake: MC where are you going?

MC: I don't know but I know one thing I'm not staying here another second

Jake: MC please, we can work this out please stay

MC: why the hell should I? I tried talking to you and all you could say was I was being paranoid

Jake: I'm sorry MC, please forgive me I..I

MC: Jake, what the hells going on? I thought we could tell each other everything and anything

Jake: we can, put the bag down and grab your jacket I need to show you something

MC grabbed her jacket and followed Jake out to the car, Jake drove into the town center and parked the car outside a house. The house was beautiful and it had a white picket fence. Amazing garden Jake took MCs hand and led her towards the house and stood near the picket fence.

MC: Jake what on earth are we doing outside somebody's house?

Jake: this isn't just anybody's house MC this is our house

MC: W-what?? Y-you bought this for us?

Jake: yes MC I did, that's why I couldn't tell you who I was talking to

MC looked into Jake's eyes, her own filling with tears, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him deep.

MC: I love you Jake

Jake: I love you to MC, come on let me show you around the place

Jake took MCs hand and together they explored their new home together, Inside there was a beautiful wooden staircase that led upstairs. Upstairs was a master bedroom with an ensuite bathroom. The bathroom had a massive walk in shower to the side of the shower was a big bathtub big enough for 2 people.

Down the landing was another 3 rooms beautifully decorated, each having their own ensuite bathroom. Downstairs there was a dining room, next to that was the kitchen which was lovely and spacious. Following on from the kitchen was the living room. It was so spacious MC couldn't stop smiling. She was so happy as she was looking round she felt Jake's arms wrap around her waist.

A couple weeks later MC and Jake were all moved into the house, Jake had rented the apartment out to Cleo as she was looking for a bigger place.

Cleo's POV

Things with Alan have been going so well we have been getting on really well, at first Alan was having his struggles with the adjustments of living a normal life again. Whenever he was having a bad day he always talked to me about it. He was still getting therapy which was a massive help to him as I could only help so much. I have been thinking about asking him to move in with me but I haven't been able to find the right time.

We have been together for some time now and I feel ready for the next step in our relationship. The only thing that is scaring me is if I ask him and he says yes we could find we are not right for each other. Then on the other hand we could find that we are right for each other and it all works out.

Alan's POV

Things with Cleo have been doing so well I had my reservations about us being together but I am glad to be proven wrong. I can feel like she wants to take the next step within our relationship. I am worried about it that I can not deny but at the same time I do care for her so much. I have a therapy appointment later today so I can seek advice from my therapist. I do still go to Cleo with my problems but not all of them as sometimes it's things she can't fix.

I have been helping her settle into her new place. She's renting it from Jake and MC, it was a very kind act for them to do asking Cleo as they knew she was looking for a bigger place. I want to be able to move forwards in my relationship with Cleo but I am scared I love her of course.

Should I push myself to move forwards with her or do I just back off completely and leave duskwood. I've thought of this for so many months now and yet I still find myself in duskwood. I feel like the only thing that is truly keeping me here is being with Cleo. She is my everything everyday as we grow closer and closer.

We haven't slept together yet. I don't want to pressure her into something she doesn't want she hinted at wanting to but it's just not happened. Do we just bite the bullet and get it over with, do we stop letting our fears and doubts cloud our relationship.

I think if this is going to happen I want it to happen the right way, Cleo deserves to be wined and dined. I will book a table at the black swan and have a romantic dinner and afterwards see where the night goes.

Jake's POV

I've never seen MC this happy before, well I have but that's a whole other story, she's so happy in our new place. We have been busy getting everything unpacked and where we want things to go. It's been a lot of hard work but we have pulled it all off and it's all been worth it to see the smile on MCs face.

Tomorrow we are going to pick up paint samples. We can't decide which shade of blue will look better in the bathroom or in the kitchen. There is another surprise I have for MC that she doesn't know about. I have been keeping this from her. It's been a lot easier to keep this surprise from her.

It has been one long day. MC is having a long soak in the bath, I told her I would order Chinese takeout so we don't have to mess about with cooking. Now that I've finished ordering the food I go to sit down on the sofa with a glass of whiskey.

I sit down taking a small box out of my pocket and opening it up, I stare at the diamond ring in the box and I can't help but smile. I am so excited to ask MC for her hand in marriage.

[burned-lariat]

Hello, I've come to cheer you up. (and myself lol)

Jex: The bane of my existance

The day Dex decides he doesn't need Joss' her whining ass anymore and as the kids would say, slide into Kristina's DMs, is the day I will compliment Chris and Dan on a job well done. That would be a hoot. lol

I'm not going to lose out on the potentiality of Dextina for more Benson propping that goes absolutely nowhere. The math is not mathing.

ChayLynn: The light at the end of the tunnel

I've got to muster up this one cause the writers are giving me scraps to work with. The last ep they were on, looks like we're turning a corner finally. There were some callbacks from a year ago that I'm not sure anyone caught.

March '22: It was this time last year that ChayLynn had just wrapped up the Bailey Louise fake family situation. BLQ left town soon after giving Bailey back, leaving Chase to wonder what was going to happen next between them. A few days past and radio silence. Chase was worried about the status quo of their situationship. The word "lost" is what Michael and Maxie used to describe how Chase felt at the time. He finally reached out to her, texting "How are u? " He'd felt the distance she put between them. Days later Chase runs into Willow. He was surprised to find out BLQ was back in town. He catches up with BLQ, catching her off guard. He was worried about her, he missed her and he wanted to make sure she was okay. The friend she never knew she needed in her life. The point is, he didn't give up on her considering she kept him in the friend zone. He fought for her because was worth fighting for.

Fast forward to now and we have this unexpected visit. Chase didn't plan on running into her due to his initial intention to visit Willow and the baby at the gate house. No one was home so he stops by the main house. Boom, surprise BLQ answers the door. She's so happy to see him, a welcome surprise. A stark difference from last year this time. She was so eager to talk to him about anything really. It happened to be about babies and reminiscing about bath time with Bailey. She needed to buy as much time as possible, anything to keep him around a little longer. Maxie's interruption was warranted, their convo was cut short. Keeping with the theme that BLQ misses her best friend, a boost she never knew she needed. After visiting with Willow and the baby, Chase comes back out ready to leave again. Another theme is where Chase is waiting for that day when BLQ expresses how she really feels. But alas, a fleeting moment between the two. He's good at hiding how he feels for the most part but that doesn't make him the world's best detective lol. At the end when he's leaving, Chase asks BLQ of she was okay? She gives him a broad answer, "Yeah, you?". He doesn't give her an answer, leaving a lot for interpretation. She'd hoped she could get inside his head, his heart. Anything to keep her going as she feels like the time she has being around him is dwindling. The moments she took for granted before, she's now scared of what will happen when there will be no more. Chase left her watching him walk out of her life once again. Her bright light, the true shining star of her life. Denial is not just some river in Egypt. This moment was meant to tell BLQ to not give up on herself because that would mean she'd be giving up on Chase in the end. He's still rooting for her, hoping she can still be that brave person her fell for a year ago.

I got misty-eyed writing that lol. 😭 I hope I've given you with enough to get you through these next few weeks. The NB should be interesting in the least. Hold on, ok.

P.S. I'm editing my ChayLynn one shot still. They are worth the agony. Hopefully over the next few days, I need to get this story out of my system or else. 🙂

Until next time...

Your presence is always welcomed!

Honestly!!! Like give us the whiplash plot twist of Destina fucking and Joss walking in on them! That's mess, that's soap! And I genuinely ship them - like I think Destina has "it." It's not me pulling an agenda like w Dexsha...ish 😂

That was a whole year ago?? It feels like three years ago! 😭 So much crap has happened, holy shit. And I always love your ChaLynn analysis because you're on the nose about everything while simultaneously giving everyone the hope they need. This was so insightful - deep down he wants her back, the person she grew to be, and whenever he's around her, she just lights up as much as she shuts down over how she hurt him. They're just...🤧

And oh boy I hope we get good content for the NB - I'm nervous about that whole shindig 😅 and YES!!! I wish you luck in your editing endeavors, and I can't wait to read it when it's out and published!

[annieintheaair]

I wanna know how far we'll go before it happens; if there's an expiration date on all the magic. I wanna know that if we make it to the finish that I'll go first, that it won't hurt if I'm not living.

Everything is weird. You’re not here but there are many yous. There’s the you that’s Dan and there’s the you of my last relationship. Somehow, being just Annie, just me, just I, no us, no we, doesn’t feel right. That’s what’s really weird for me — I’ve always been ok just being me, no +1.

I waited until the last minute to start packing. I imagined us living together, as planned, packing for our trip. I stayed up until midnight slowly gathering things to put in my suitcase but it didn’t feel right because I knew we were no longer taking this trip together.

In the morning, I got ready and thought about how I take this trip every year but this year is different— we planned this trip together and now I’m going without you. It just doesn’t feel right.

At the airport, I thought about how we’d probably be at a bar grabbing drinks before our flight. On the flight, some other guy sat in the seat next to me. I automatically didn’t like him because he wasn’t you. He constantly shook his leg and he smelled kind of bad.

Nothing felt right. Landing in NJ, I thought about how last time I did that, we were there together.

I went to dinner that night with my family and there was a mention about how you reached out to me recently. Everyone said to stay away from you, don’t talk to you, and keep you in the past.

After Dan passed away, everyone was quick to tell me how they would have forgiven him and accepted him if I had allowed him back into my life. Dan always said that, too, but I never believed it at the time. Did everyone say this after the fact because they knew it was too late and they’d never have to? 

When people are still here, it’s easy to hold grudges and refuse to let go of the past. When someone is gone, you really have no choice but to let it all go. Forgiveness comes easy when someone has died.

For those still here, forgiveness feels more difficult. I consider myself to be a very forgiving person and feel like I have already forgiven my exes for the things they did, just like I forgave Dan after all of the things he ever did to me. Withholding forgiveness doesn’t help you. When I tried to see silver linings after Dan was gone, I at least felt better knowing that at the time he died, he knew I had forgiven him.

When I wanted to say so much in response to my family at dinner that night, I kept it in and didn’t react instead. Forgiveness isn’t theirs to give, but mine. The ways I hurt, still hurt at times, but that doesn’t mean that I haven’t forgiven you.

We made the drive the next day to Martha’s Vineyard. To get there, we have to drive through Rhode Island— Providence in particular, and I have so many mixed emotions being there. I remember, for years, we’d drive through and my heart just ached. I’d get sick to my stomach thinking about Dan and who he was with after me. These days, I drive through, taking in all of the nostalgia. Some things look the same and never change, but the city is ever changing— new buildings, new roads, and I’m sure lots of new people.

Someone, much like myself, is about to embark on their college journey at JWU within the next few weeks. Maybe they’ll meet a cute future chef at Snowden dining hall that first night after their parents drop them off. If Ultra is still there, or maybe a new club in the same location, they’ll share their first kiss on the dance floor and they’ll change each other’s lives forever.

The way the highway forms around the city, like a great big hug, has me feeling like I’m home again every time I’m there. I think about it often, how it would be nice to pickup a work trip and visit but then again, there’s no one there that I want to see anymore. Maybe there’s a weird part of me that thinks Dan is hiding in the city somewhere and if I go back, I’ll find him, but I know that’s not reality.

After a day of driving, we finally made it to Woods Hole to get on the ferry. It was drizzling a little and it was a cooler, somewhat gloomy day. Either way, I was excited to be away from work for a bit and back to a place that knows me so well.

Happy place— it has always been my happy place. The worries of the world kind of disappear while I’m there. Maybe that makes me irresponsible in a way or maybe it makes me more relaxed. I’m really not sure.

The year Dan died, I didn’t get to go to Martha’s Vineyard but I went to The Cape for a weekend after my cousin’s wedding. I went the year after he died and now again, here we are, almost two years later.

I felt like I really checked out for the week. I didn’t talk to many friends or think about work much. Every once in a while, I was reminded that going home eventually not only meant going back to work but getting back to my house and having to deal with all of the unpacking and my Honda Civic, that was having issues before I left for my trip. Why is life so full of problems in the real world? Being on Martha’s Vineyard makes me feel safe, like the island protects me from the realities of the world.

I concluded my trip on Tuesday evening, taking an outdoor shower under the stars. I kept seeing shadows, like maybe Dan was there with me. I looked up, and there was one overly bright star. I imagined that it was him, up there in heaven, watching over me.

We went to a Vineyard Sound concert earlier in the evening and one of the eight guys said he was from Winchester. I thought he reminded me of Dan’s childhood friend, CJ. I felt like I should be cheering in the crowd when the guy introduced himself and his hometown but what would I say? That the love of my life, who died almost two years ago, was also from there?

I wish, everyday, that there was some way to bring Dan back. If I had to give up 10 or 20 years of my life to have him here with me, I would. They say life is short but I feel like life is incredibly long for those of us who have lost someone we love.

I constantly wonder if I’ll ever find happiness again. I want to be with someone who I know, without a shadow of a doubt, loves me. I want to see it in their eyes everyday.

I saw the movie, It Ends With Us, the other night. I mentally prepared myself for it because everyone said there were domestic violence scenes that they couldn’t watch. Am I desensitized? I watched the whole movie just fine. Not that I didn’t see anything wrong but I didn’t feel like anything in the movie was so bad to let go of someone without giving them the opportunity to change. I felt like the male main character would possibly change after the movie. I haven’t read the books so I’m not sure what happens in the second book but I doubt the female lead would end up taking him back.

I recognize that forgiveness doesn’t mean taking people back after they hurt you, and although that can be a result of forgiveness, it isn’t required. I wish people could be more honest about what they want. Why did you reach out to me recently? Did you want to come back around to see if you could try to hurt me again? Why would you say you want to be friends? Is it some sort of trick?

The thing is, I have no plans to get back on any dating apps ever again. By being off the apps, I’ve been able to meet people in real life, which I think is how it should be. If we met in real life and not on Bumble, would we even have dated? You texting me got me thinking — you got some weird version of me that wasn’t very happy. I was feeling like a fish out of water in my new town and you lived in my old town. You felt like home and going to see you on the weekend was like going home. We’d be out and refer to your apartment as “home” because it felt like it was home for both of us together.

Even though weekends with you felt like I was home, I was still a guest in a way. I couldn’t maintain my old life while living in yours. I felt like I lost part of my identity. Maybe we would have worked out if we had been living in the same area and not dedicated our entire weekends to being together. We could have met up on a random Tuesday evening for dinner or my work schedule could have been different and not revolved around you. Part of me wishes we had that chance to do it all over again.

Anyway, I’m flying home to Texas today after what would have been our vacation and tonight, I’ll be working, because nothing sucks quite as much as spending a night home alone, knowing today would have been our one year anniversary of when we went on our first date. Work distractions somehow sound so much better.

Happy, what would have been, our one year anniversary.

xoxo

Annie