#i really never know how to tag anything weeee

[pastelwell]

Hiii : ) My hannigram fic Begin to Blur has been translated into Spanish, yaaay. I've now added the link to AO3.

Enjoy, and thank you to CelestialNights5 on AO3 for translating it.

Te amo x

[grymmnox]

weekly fic recs #18

weeee here we go

fandom(s): bungo stray dogs, the owl house

ship(s): soukoku, shin soukoku, and gen fics

Oneshots

putting the dog to sleep; mallow_mango - bungo stray dogs

mature | 28.9k words | chuuya/dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

"Why are you looking at me?"

"...Because I want to."

Or, the story of two boys, desperately trying to pull each other out of the darkness.

tainted sorrow (of a promise kept); mallow_mango - bungo stray dogs

mature | 17.6k words | chuuya/dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

"Oda... before he died, he told me to save the weak. But really... they aren't the only ones that need saving."

Or, seven times where Dazai is saved, plus one time where he can't be.

pranks because i love you and because views are cool; xxalwayssofia - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 5.1k words | chuuya/dazai

summary:

The five times Chuuya's tries to prank Dazai for TikTok and the one time Dazai gets him back (not).

That’s me, standin’ in the mirror; minukke - bungo stray dogs

not rated | 2.9k words | ADA & dazai, ADA & PM, atsushi & dazai, dazai & kunikida

summary:

“So...you’re Dazai from four years ago?” Kenji broke the silence first. He tickled his chin thoughtfully. “Wow, you’re really different!”

Dazai made a non-committal noise.

Or, teenage Dazai, Port Mafia executive and dubbed the "Demon Prodigy", finds out how much he's changed in four years.

It’s Not Gay If We’re In America; Mystic_Panda_4 - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 20k words | chuuya/dazai

summary:

Each December, Dazai disappears off the face of the earth for the last two or three weeks of the year, leaving the ADA completely baffled as to where he's gone, but who can complain when he returns in a much better mood than he was when he left, and the Agency gets two to three weeks of blissful Dazai-free antics?

Or, Soukoku gets stranded in New York one December for a mission, which kickstarts a cheesy Christmas story eight years in the making, all to cumulate in the Christmas of a lifetime.

*****

"I would never lie about something as precious as Christmas!" Dazai insisted, holding a hand over his chest in mock offense that Chuuya would even suggest such a thing. "I mean it with 100% sincerity, Christmas isn't a romantic holiday in America, you can ask anyone in this hotel if you don't believe me, so therefore it makes sense that if we celebrate Christmas here, in America, it won't be a romantic thing."

"That's about as flimsy of an excuse as saying it's not gay as long as you're wearing socks."

"It's not gay if you're wearing socks," Dazai insisted. "And it's not gay to celebrate Christmas in America either."

... But It Is Gay If We’re In Japan; Mystic_Panda_4 - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 5.7k words | chuuya/dazai, ADA & dazai, chuuya & PM, chuuya & kouyou

summary:

Dazai and Chuuya have been hiding their relationship with each other for the past eight years, and now that they are officially engaged, it's time to come clean. However... Double Black has never been the type to do anything the easy way, so naturally they let the Armed Detective Agency and Port Mafia know about their engagement in the most chaotic way possible: Not actually letting them know, and waiting til they figure it out themselves.

A sequel to my fic, It's Not Gay If We're In America featuring more fluff and less angst, Dazai realizing the ADA are more than just coworkers to him and Chuuya and the rest of the Port Mafia being saps.

Completed Fics

If the Far Side Saw You; birbleh - bungo stray dogs

mature | 9 chapters | 46.4k words | too many relationship tags i am tired. its centered around atsushi and dazai so its like them and almost everybody ok | READ TAGS

summary:

“Please.” The crouching child picks at Dazai’s pant leg. “Don’t leave.”

Dazai examines the gaps between the railing. “Comparing our sizes, you would more likely slip into the river.”

“… I don’t mean by accident.”

And Dazai knows exactly what the boy means and he can’t help but grin. His grin disregards the age of the ears listening. “So, you know what I’ve been wishing for all my life,” the mafioso answers darkly…

(in which two ADA members are reverted to their younger selves; Atsushi, when he is eight years old and Dazai, before he loses his friend.)

Incomplete Fics

A Horse Named Cold Air; Mayday505 - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 1/9 chapters | 14.2k words | chuuya/dazai, chuuya & dazai, chuuya & yuan, ADA & dazai, dazai & mori, dazai & ranpo, chuuya & shirase, chuuya & shirase & yuan, dazai & the sheep, dazai & yosano | READ TAGS

summary:

As time and wisdom often tell, however, humans tend not to realise their own faults and regrets until they are knocking on their door, crossing the precipice into reality, a cold wave of ice water awakening the present. They tend not to be able to truly reflect and arouse change, unless slapped in the face with their deepest regrets.

Dazai, despite assumptions, is no exception to this rule of transience. That fate will always catch up to its victims.

This made clear, by the darkness that envelops him, cool white tiles beneath trembling hands and the absent-minded drip of the tap above his head.

--

(Or, Dazai is forced to confront his past mistakes when a familiar figure comes to the agency seeking help in a missings persons case.)

City of Scars; EmeraldEclipse - bungo stray dogs

not rated | 12/? chapters | 25k words | chuuya/dazai, chuuya & dazai, akutagawa/atsushi, akutagawa & atsushi, minor or bg relationship(s) | READ TAGS

summary:

The same boy who called him a Chibi earlier entered the classroom before coming and taking a seat right next to him. Chuuya took a deep breath, maybe he didn't mean it earlier and it was just a slip of the ton-

"So, the tiny Chibi isn't a seventh grader?"

Oh for the love of God. Was it too late to change schools again?

Or, Nakahara Chuuya transfers to a new school, and it's everything like he expects it to be.

Well... mostly. If you can ignore the stupidly cute bandaged freak that keeps annoying him.

________

Previously named 'i knew you were trouble when you walked in (so shame on me for falling in love)'

Demon Days; Saturnidaes - the owl house

general audiences | 5/? chapters | 15.5k words | flapjack & hunter, hunter & luz, eda & hunter

summary:

Grimwalkers are created to serve. And creations can be changed, adjusted to perfection and syphoned dry of all flaws. Except the Golden Guards never learn. They serve and betray and then die by Philip's hand, and that is simply the way of things. But when Luz shoves herself into Hunter's life, she creates a crack in the cycle. Maybe this time it'll be different.

OR: an AU where grimwalkers are beasts that take the form of witches.

( A rewrite of 'Clipped Wings, Watch Me Fall'. )

Corpse-stink; crushpunchh - the owl house

teen and up | 7/? chapters | 27.9k words | hunter & luz, eda & luz, eda & hunter | READ TAGS

summary:

“The Emperor, er…” Hunter rolls onto his side. “He found out about what happened in Latissa on Thursday night. He’s not—” a merciful man, “—exactly pleased.”

"So, what? You’re here ‘cause the Emperor figured out Kikimora tried to kill you?”

(Belos finds out Hunter worked with Luz in Latissa. It does not go well. Belos eventually also finds out Hunter got a palisman in Latissa. That goes even worse.)

the sound of the demon calling you home; GlupBlippo - the owl house

teen and up | 12/? chapters | 16.2k words | caleb & hunter, belos & hunter, caleb & flapjack, flapjack & hunter, hunter & luz, eda & hunter, hunter & willow | READ TAGS

summary:

The voice inside Hunter's head that calls itself Caleb—and is, conveniently, "probably cursed"—hasn't bothered him in a while, at least until the human and that cardinal palisman decide to run his perfectly planned life off course. Now Hunter's back to arguing with a pissed off, blaspheming, disembodied voice, while also trying to keep his uncle happy—and, of course, trying to keep the stupid bird out of harm's reach. But he's handling everything perfectly fine. Never mind that Caleb seems to think that he is not, in fact, handling everything perfectly fine.

Or, Caleb ends up sharing Hunter's head and both are understandably pissed about it. Updates every other Monday.

[alwaysthrowsscissors]

Fic Writer Questions!

Thanks for the tag @venhedish dont mind if I do darlin'! Loved reading your answers too!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

17 and I started May 2020

2) What's your total AO3 word count?

84,430! Sooooo close to that 100k milestone I just need to get off my writing hiatus since I have a beefy one shot WIP and a couple kink-meme prompt fills started that will get me to the finish line!

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

On Ao3/as an adult, just Supernatural.

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Well Jung – This was my first and I’m still super surprised it took off so well considering all the head-hopping. I also hadn’t written fiction since high school so it’s pretty technically rough!

I Can’t Forget the Time and Place Where We Just Met – Who doesn’t love a good old-fashioned double amnesia fic! This was a SPN Masquerade fill and it was super fun to write!

Kiss the Cook – Another SPN Masquerade fill inspired by Dean in an apron in S15. Kitchen fucking is fun fucking!

Iodine and Stitches – 3/5 SPN Masquerade fills that I did fall 2020. Seriously such a fun event to participate in I cant recommend it enough. This is one my only fics with a serious tone throughout which is tough for this clown.

Double Jeopardy – Written for my buddy after finding out she has an intelligence kink! Cut to us giggling about Sam losing his damn mind when he plays Jeopardy with clever Dean!

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Listen…I can’t fully express how much comments give me LIFE! I want to know what you liked about my silly musings, I want to know your fav part, I want to know that I gave you a boner! I'll take a button smash, I'll take an emoticon. Anything, everything! I make a point to always respond back to show my appreciation for people taking time out of their day to make my day.

6) What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Without a shadow of a doubt Yesterday Don’t Matter if It’s Gone about what would happen if Sam and Dean hooked up during Mystery Spot and exacerbated Sam’s downward spiral during the months of Tuesdays. I write a lot of humour and this sucker is humourless PLUS has an unhappy ending! Weeee!

8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you've written?

Never have but not opposed to the idea.

9) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Nope, I’ve been pretty fortunate but I also write pretty tame shit. So if I start dabbling more in the archive warnings it may change. I do have a fun multichap wincestiel non-con WIP in the works 😈

10) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

AHAHAHAHAHA I’d say a good 90-95% of my 84k wordcount is smut! All M/M all explicit! Fun times over at Casa Scissors 😏. I do have some upcoming stuff that’s more plot heavy though which I’m looking forward to.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I fucking hope not that would be a big bummer.

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! And as a noob I had to pinch myself, it still fucking blows my mind! A lovely Ao3 user Yigelulu translated I Can’t Forget the Time and Place Where We Just Met into Chinese. It was so incredibly cool to see my words in another language and a great honour that they liked my fic enough to put in all that work!

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yup! Turn Your Head and Cough with my budbud Wearingdeantoprom. Dean gets his prostate rubbed for the first time at the doctors office.

14) What's your all time favorite ship?

Wincest wincest all the wincest! My brain is infected and there is no cure! I am a pro-shipper though ship and let ship my dudes. I also dabble in wincestiel and LOVE any combination of winkline and may write it one day. I don’t really read much from other fandoms. I’ve read some George/Fred (I like brother fucking ok?) and I love me some Jess Mariano/Dean Forester over in the Gilmore Girls camp (the perfect enemies to lovers) but its unfortunately such a small ship. Any souls reading this who like those ships, please drop any recs into my box!

15) What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

Anything I am passionate about I will finish. I’ve only killed one thing because I got bored with it but I posted my fav part for a fic challenge. I hate not having something to show for my spent time (I know it's a hobby but it's the principle damnit!) and I hate unfinished things. Those damn little ao3 red circles haunt me 🚫

16) What are your writing strengths?

Christ uhhh I’ll say I’m most consistently praised in comments for my dialogue and it’s what always flows the smoothest for me. I think my humour is also a strength, it comes very naturally when I write which is why I have a hard time keeping it out of my fics! Times are tough I just wanna make y’all giggle ok?

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

Frankly, my greatest weakness is that I don’t take it seriously enough to look at my past writing critically for improvement. I also write (non-fiction) for my job and had extensive training to do so, so when its for this hobby I honestly whip it out, edit a couple times, and slap it up ‘good enough’ styles and I don’t go back to re-read once posted. I think if I looked back, I could see lots of opportunities for improvement and could go from a fine writer to a good writer. I’d also say that I’ve written pretty fun fluffy cracky smutty stuff so I guess another weakness is a lack of depth of plot and subject matter. I do want to explore this stuff more though.

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

My concern is if you don’t speak the language fluently, then native speakers reading your fic might feel a big disconnect if you get colloquialisms and euphemism etc. incorrect. It could take them out of your fic if its not authentic enough. I don’t speak any other language fluently so it would END BADLY. I can speak and read French VERY POORLY and that’s it so no, I will never write in another language unless its jibberish I invented myself!

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

The only fanfic I wrote before SPN last year was a handful of super cracky, gen Gundam Wing fanfiction in high school!! They are on a broken USB stick which kills me I want to read them so badly! All my other creative writing was original fiction mainly horror/thrillers. I stopped when I started my undergrad cause...that shit is a lot of work yo.

20) What's your favorite fic you've written?

My first love is my first baby Well Jung. I love the plot, I love the humour in it, I love the heart, and it’s still some of my fav sex I’ve written. And the title makes me giggle too who doesn’t love a bad pun? I'm so thrilled it was so successful but it would still be my favourite even if 3 people read it. It made me rediscover writing as a hobby and helped me explore this wonderful (yet insane) fandom. I love all my babies and I even think the writing is stronger in other fics, but he will always be #1 in my heart.

OK this was fun I love talking about fic writing! If any of you read my stuff and want to know more, hit me with an ask; I love making new frans! Tagging @oddsocksandstuff @samanddeaninpanties @raidens-realm I think my other writer mutuals have been tagged by Ven!

[drawlfoy]

The Wonders of Ohio P.4

masterlist - find parts 1, 2, and 3 here

request guidelines

did you miss me :P

pairing: draco x reader

requested: by prepubescent me

summary: american high school student y/n y/l/n’s senior year gets turned upside down when her family hosts a british exchange student that’s clearly keeping some secrets.

warnings: language and drug use mentions

a/n: hi everyone...i know that this has been a long time coming but. here she is. i finally finished this after the draft sat for over 6 months...here she is though! i’m excited weeee

tags tags tags

word count: 2k

music recs: hate candidate by BLOODHYPE, archie, marry me by alvvays

“No, no,” Y/N interrupted,  gently pushing Draco’s hands away from his locker. “It’s right to the number, left past the next number once, and right straight to the last number. You twist it right to reset it...no, like this...”

“This is pathetic, I don’t even need to put anything in a box in the wall,” Draco snarled, his gray eyes flaming.

“It’s really not that deep,” she said, snorting at his attitude. “Do they not have locks in England?”

Instead of answering, he huffed dramatically and scowled. “Open it up for me, will you? It’s not worth my time to learn.”

“You’re going to be here for a whole year, you know.” Y/N’s remark contradicted with her actions as she reapproached the locker and twisted out the combination. “But how can I say no to you, ever the gentlemen?”

She held out a hand out expectantly as he stared at her, his eyes full of confusion. 

“Your phone,” she said.

“My...my what?”

“I know, it’s weird, but they prohibit phones in orientation. Something about bonding or whatever. Just give it here, and we’ll keep it in here. If it goes off in any of the activities they’ll take it from you.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Okay, okay, I respect that attitude.” Y/N smirked, patting him on the shoulder as he flinched away from her. “Just don’t be mad at me when they confiscate it until 2.”

He stared at her for a few seconds longer before clearing his throat and nodding. 

<^>

The speeches at the beginning were always the longest part--the unnecessary dramatization of the importance of high school, the faux motivation mantras, the “love yourself” bits ironically being performed by some of the most insufferable members of the ASB--and Y/N was ready to get it over with, Draco seemed to feel the same way, as every time she looked at him, he looked another shade of uninterested.

She tried poking fun at the performances a couple times to see his reaction, and surprisingly enough, it was slightly well received.

“You see the redhead down there?” she whispered to him, gesturing towards the current speaker with her chin. He gave her a tight nod in response. “That’s Heather, our ASB president. She’s a total tool. Spews all this ‘vaping in the bathrooms isn’t cool!’ shit but one time I walked in on her doing lines in the performance wing bathrooms. She’s crazy, I’m telling you.”

Draco seemed amused at this, resting his cheek in his palm and watching her intently. “Lines?”

“Cocaine.”

“Cocaine?”

“You know what? I’m gonna quit while we’re ahead. I don’t want to be the one to corrupt you.”

Draco scoffed. “You’re worried about corrupting me?”

“Well, yeah,” she said. “I’m not the one who doesn’t know what cocaine is.”

He sniffed at this, turning his attention back to Heather’s mind-numbing anti-bullying presentation that was clearly put together moments before. Silence ensued for the next few moments before Draco sucked in a breath and turned to look at her. “What’s an ASB?”

“Oh, you should be so glad that you have to ask that,” Y/N stage whispered. “It’s student government. It’s an acronym for something. I never cared enough to remember it. The elections are super corrupt--it’s basically a popularity contest. They don’t do anything either...I don’t even know why it exists anyways.”

“So I take it you’re not popular?” 

“By choice, I’ll have you know,” Y/N pointed out. “I just made friends with the people I had stuff in common with. We all just happened to not be big fans of putting vodka in our Hydroflasks and the like...What I mean by that is that we aren’t big partiers.” She was quick to clarify when she saw the confusion on Draco’s face. 

He didn’t seem to understand any more of what she had said, or at least didn’t show any interest in it, scooting away a few inches from her and turning his head back to Heather’s speech.

The presentation ended within another 10 minutes, much to Y/N’s delight. One had been enough for her--two orientations was pushing it.

Maybe that’s why all the ASB kids are so awful she thought to herself as they made they way to Draco’s first class on the schedule. If I had to be here every year, I’d probably be a grade A rat as well.

“How’d they put you in AP Physics C?” Y/N asked him as they walked into the science lab. “I’m in your same period...and I had to take two years of physics before that to be qualified to take it. Did you take a Physics A level or something? Is that what they call it?”

Draco blinked twice. “Er...sure. My professors told me that I was skilled in Arithmancy, if that’s what you mean..?”

“Arithmancy? Is that just a fancy word for math?” she pressed. “I thought you guys just called it maths.”

“You could say so.”

Before she could push for any more answers, someone behind them cleared their throat. Y/N spun around, her face lighting up when she saw who it was.

“Mr. Whitacre!” she exclaimed. 

“Y/N, my least favorite student,” he greeted, a cheeky smile concealed by a rather bushy black beard. “I’m surprised they haven’t kicked you out of orientation. Haven’t you head? This is supposed to be an event for new students...not jaded old souls such as yourself.”

“Oh, you know me.” She rested one of her hands on a lab table, raising an eyebrow. “I just couldn’t stay away from the thrilling suggestion of physics.”

“Sure. And you are...” 

Draco just stared at him for a few seconds with a disgusted expression until Y/N elbowed him in the side, hard. “You’ll have to excuse Draco. He’s still going through jet lag. Aren’t you, Draco?” 

Y/N sent him a death glare until he wiped the expression off his face and uttered an awkward, “Er, yeah.”

The rest of orientation was just as uncomfortable and unnatural as Draco’s introduction to Mr. Whitacre. Y/N was surprised to see that they had a very similar schedule as Draco seemed entirely clueless to what the subjects even were. She mentioned her concerns to him briefly, but he seemed entirely unbothered.

“It can’t be any harder than school back home,” he told her in his prim and proper voice, prompting a small smile to grow across Y/N’s face. 

“Oh, I’m sure,” she said, her voice hardly containing her sarcasm.

The rest of the morning was spent toiling around each of the empty classrooms and memorizing room numbers so Draco wouldn’t be lost come Thursday morning. Y/N wasn’t having an entirely terrible time, as, much to her surprise, Draco wasn’t a complete dickwad. There were moments where he actually had something interesting or worthy to say, and when he didn’t look like he just stepped in something disgusting, she enjoyed the walks between classes. By the end of 5th period, she had concluded that Draco could make absolutely anything sound beautiful in his accent.For once, they were both being entirely civil to each other, and Y/N found herself wishing that the school day went on a bit longer. At least...until the walk to French.

“Excuse me,” a voice carried over Y/N’s as she was in the middle of telling Draco some particularly hot gossip from last year. “I don’t think I’ve seen you here before.”

Heather stood to their left, leaning coolly on the wall of lockers, her right shoulder just subtly dropped in their direction. 

“Hey Heather,” Y/N greeted. “This is Draco. He’s our exchange student this year.”

“Hello.” Draco’s voice was stiffer than usual.

She smiled, her lips stretching out over perfectly straight white teeth. “Hi Draco! Listen, I know it can be hard here at first, especially if you haven’t grown up around here, but I swear we’re all super friendly.” She held out her hand, smiling even wider. Y/N hardly managed to hold back a laugh as Draco took it and limply shook it like one would fondle a dead fish. 

Heather’s face remained just as cheery. “I just want to say that, as ASB president, it’s my job to make sure you feel like you fit in. Let me give you my snapchat, so if you ever need anything, I’m just one snap away.”

“Oookay, thank you Heather,” Y/N interrupted, wrapping her fingers around Draco’s sleeve and pulling. “I’ll give it to him tonight if he wants it. We have to find French now.” She couldn’t tell if it was just her imagination, but she swore that she could see Draco send her a slightly grateful look.

“AP French? Quelle coïncidence! I’m headed there too.”

No matter how briskly she dragged Draco along, Heather was able to catch up and chatter away, asking him about life in the UK and how he found Americans. She couldn’t help but allow a little smirk when he answered, telling her “a little annoying, quite frankly.” 

French was even more insufferable than she was expecting it to be. The strict teacher, M. Smith (despite being more American than everyone in the room, yes, he did insist on being called Monsieur), coupled with the weird, forlorn glances Heather kept sending Draco made Y/N feel crushingly uncomfortable. With the way that Draco was fidgeting, she could guess that he felt the same way. 

Suddenly, 2 couldn’t come soon enough.

<^>

“So, what’d you think?” Y/N asked as they made their way back to Y/N’s car. She toyed with her lanyard, turning and twisting the keys until they couldn’t twist anymore. 

Draco stepped over to the passenger side door, waiting for her to press unlock. “Your friend Heather is very friendly.”

“She’s not my friend, Draco, I already told you that.”

“She certainly comes up to talk to you a lot for someone who isn’t your friend.”

She shifted into drive and began pulling out of the parking lot. “It’s an American thing. And plus, she wouldn’t be talking to me if I didn’t have a pretty boy with an accent living with me.”

Draco froze up, sending her a weird sideways look.

“Don’t be so overdramatic, kiddo,” she continued. “American girls go crazy for British accents. Trust me. There’s going to be so many girls throwing themselves at you come tomorrow that you won’t even know what to do with yourself.”

Y/N tried to keep the bitterness from creeping into her tone as she told Draco this. It wasn’t like she liked him or anything--no way--it was just frustrating to know that the moment he stepped foot on the school grounds tomorrow, he would be snapped up into a flurry of admirers. These few days had felt like she was keeping a delicate, sophisticated secret in the guest room in the hall over, but it was time for her to snap out of it. 

“The feeling certainly isn’t mutual,” he finally said. Y/N could see that his head was rested against the window as he looked out into the trees as they passed by a particularly wooded area. “American accents give me a migraine.”

“Funny, me too.”

“But you have one.”

“Your point? Pass me the Advil.”

“The...the what?”

Y/N sucked in a deep breath and tried to keep herself from bursting out into a cackle. “Paracetamol, maybe? I think that’s the British version.”

“Er...I’m sorry?” Draco had moved his head from its resting place on the window to send her a confused look.

“Forget about it.”

The drive back was silent for the rest of the way. Upon arriving, Draco made a beeline for his room and made no indication of wanting to come back out, so Y/N spent the rest of the evening ironing out her physics problem sets and getting her backpack ready for school. 

My last first day she thought to herself as she zipped her binders and pencil pouch up, a hint of nostalgia threatening to choke her up for a moment. 

The entire situation felt eerie and strange. All her life, she’d been waiting to get out of school so she could go to college and meet new friends and have her fun life experiences, and now it was all beginning to happen. She tried to imagine how Draco must’ve been feeling in that moment and could hardly manage to come up with anything she could relate to. He’d been uprooted from his home, his family, his life, all to move to fucking Ohio of all places to finish out school. Y/N would feel a twinge of pity if he wasn’t such a prick.

Which, by the way, now that she really thought of it, was perhaps becoming overshadowed by all the little things she noticed about him. Obviously, he was very pretty, but there was something else just magnetizing about him that she’d never seen before in a person. The way in which he carried himself, the regal manner he spoke in, the delicate and practiced motions of his hands whenever he did anything menial--it all added up to paint Draco as the picture of elegance. She came to the realization that she’d never met anyone quite like him before as she was getting into bed and turning her lights off. He seemed so incredibly detached from reality, but decidedly so, that she couldn’t help but feel fascinated with it all. 

And he was all hers to figure out for the next 9 months. 

final a/n: huhhhh isn’t that funny that i actually came out with a different fic than i said i would? i think i want to do that quarantine thing a little bit later and make it a series. i’ve planned that i want to finish mirror, mirror in the coming weeks and then transfer to writing the “one shot” that was scheduled to be posted today as a series as well as this. exciting stuff to come!

[miss-smrxtiee]

-Regret-

Ethan x F!MC (Eliana Valentine)

Summary: All it takes is 5 minutes for his world to turn his world upside down.

Warnings: Swearing.

A/N: CH.11 WAS JUST *chefs kiss*

OH tag squad: @aylamreads @aylamwrites @kaavyaethanramsey @choicesstan1 1 @kinkypot @ramseysno1rookie @vampireblissblog

If you would like to be removed or added just let me know!

~MASTERLIST~

moodboard by me!

————————————————————

Beep!

Life’s hard sometimes.

Beep!

It can be perfect one second.

Beep!

And the next it’s a living hell.

Beep!

But she never expected it to end like this.

“Eliana!” She her a voice through the window of her quarantined room. She felt like hell. She was in hell. But somehow she collected enough strength to lift her head and open her eyes, only to be met with his Atlantic blue ones.

“Eth- Cough! Ethan? Is everything okay? Cough!”

She saw a flash of pain in Ethan’s eyes as he took in her state, her eyes felt heavy and irritated, her nose was coated in a purple color from sneezing, her skin was pale and colorless, she was hot one minute and then freezing cold the next. Her body never seemed to take a break.

She looked how she felt.

“Gosh Rook...” Ethan felt hopeless and powerless. Her friend had already fallen into a coma and she was only declining.

“Can i come in?”

She nodded her head, her throat too sore to say anything else.

Ethan pulled on a hazmat suit and walked inside through the glass doors and walked over to her weak figure in the moonlight lit room.

“June, Baz, Sienna, and Jackie are all in the lab working, Bryce and Elijah went to go get them food and I came to check up on you.” He takes your hand and gives it a gentle squeeze.

“I don’t think I have anymore symptoms so that’s good but I still feel even more tired and sore.” She answers turning her head to look at Raf’s empty bed. Ethan cups her cheek and stares into her tired eyes.

“I’m not going to let anything bad happen to you, you’re going to make it through this Eliana.” Ethan’s voice was sure and thick with emotion and Eliana gave him a small smile.

“You haven’t called me Rookie since you walked in, that’s unlike you.” Eliana voiced before coughing a few more time into her elbow.

“I guess seeing you like this.” He gestures to your body. “Helped me realize that I...” he looked into her eyes.

“-care about you a lot... and you’re too important to me and I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure you walk out of this room” he finished.

Eliana smiles warmly at him and with that said, Ethan wraps his arms around you and you snuggle into his chest and suddenly feel at ease and more relaxed.

“Ethan if I don’t make-“ he covers your mouth with his gloved hand before removing it and speaking.

“You’re going to make it, no ifs or what ifs because you will survive this. You’re the strongest person I know and if anyone can do it, it’s you.” He says before snuggling back into you.

Will you though?

His voice is so sure...

But the way he holds onto you like it might be the last moment begs to differ.

The monitor continues

Beep!

Beep!

And you can only help but feel like one minute, one hour, a day, a week.

That the beep doesn’t stop and.. well.

That’s it.

You’re gone.

But Ethan’s grip on you gives you a small sliver of hope that this won’t be the last time he holds you.

It won’t be the last time he says he cares about you.

You’re not going to let it be.

So even as you feel your body weakening, you focus on the strong body that’s holding you. Caring for you. Making sure that it won’t be the last moment, despite the floating thoughts in your head that it will.

“Ethan?”

“Yes?”

“Thank you.”

And with that, you fall into a uncomfortable, but hopeful sleep.

After you had closed your eyes and went to sleep, Ethan rests his head against yours. He looks down at you and drops his mouth to your ear.

“I love you, Eliana”

————————————————————

WEEEE I’m really surprised this only took me about half a day to write but I hope you guys enjoyed this fic and please like and reblog to help out us writers! -S💖

[boobidabooski]

Sunday Afternoon

I’m still figuring out how to use this app so please bear with me. I’m also a weeee bit rusty cause I haven’t written in awhile. I hope you enjoy though! :)

Format might be a little wonky? :/

Summary: Harry cheated and tries to save the relationship.

Voicemail to Harry on Saturday, 4:36 PM: “Hey. Was wondering if you’d wanna come over and cuddle for a little? Really hoping you’ll get back to me, love you.

Voicemail from Harry on Sunday, 3:02 AM: “I’m so sorry, y/n. Jus’ atta lil’ get together with my friends. I shoulda called sooner but ‘twas hectic. I love you.”

Sunday Afternoon

I play the slurred voicemail for Harry after he had arrived to my apartment, showing him how he left me hanging for the whole night. I sent him a, “We need to talk,” text that everyone in a relationship always dreads. A tight line forms across his lips when the voicemail is done playing and he just looks at me with sorry eyes

“M’sorry love, I really am.” Harry says, trying to get me to look at him. But I can’t. I felt so hurt after being left alone like that for so long without any explanation or make up for it. But then I did get my explanation a little bit after I woke up today. A cheeky little post on Instagram made by a petite blonde girl named Ainsley. She had tagged him in a photo of him with his arm across her shoulders. A carefree smile plastered on both of their rosy faces. Rosy cheeks caused by the alcohol of course.

I pull up the picture, shoving it to Harry’s chest and letting him take a look as I go to sit on the small sofa placed against the wall of my tiny living room. I watch him swallow hard. My heart starts to fall a little knowing something did in fact happen between him and this woman that night. “Wanna explain to me why you’re all over a woman who isn’t your girlfriend?” I ask sternly but picking at my nails nervous for the answer I will receive.

“She’s just a good friend, baby. I promise. Nothing’s goin on between us.” He’s lying to me. And he knows I can tell. I’ve picked up on Harry’s telltales these past few months. He rocks back and forth a little on his feet when he lies to me. He picks at his bottom lip with his index and thumb when he’s nervous, and he’s doing both right now.

“Don’t fucking lie to me,” I say through clenched teeth knowing that my harshness will get to him. His head snaps up from the phone and he looks at me with confusion. He had been leaving me for hours on end with no explanation a lot recently. No calls or text messages to tell me he was safe. No I love you’s in response to mine.

“Don’t look at me like that, Harry. You’ve been ignoring me. Leaving me for hours on end. I don’t get texts from you anymore. I have no explanation for anything.” He still hasn’t said anything. He’s lost in thought, pondering on what he should say. He lets out a little sigh and looks away from me, remorse evident on his face. And that’s when my heart begins to beat rapidly against my chest. I can feel the pit forming in my stomach and my body begins to feel shaky.

“I kissed her.”

His words replay in my head. Seeping into me and making my already breaking heart shatter into a million pieces. Pieces that can’t be picked up and glued back together. His words are the only thought I have right now.

His words permanent in my mind like a tattoo. How could he do this to me after all the I love you’s? All of the little moments that made me feel euphoric just thinking about them. Tears start to stain my cheeks and my breathing is shaky. There’s a fire lit inside my body. Not the kind that was ignited from a kiss or a small touch that makes you feel all warm and giddy. The feeling that he had once made me feel. No. It was an angry, searing heat. He lied to me. He gave me false hope.

“I’ve done nothing to wrong you, Harry. I’ve done nothing but love you. Through everything. Why?” Those words sting the back of my throat. He can tell I’m starting to choke up and his eyes too start to well up with tears. I want to give in. I want so badly to just take him into my arms and run my fingers through his unruly hair. I want to wipe the tears from his beautiful green eyes. I want to tell him I love him. But I can’t.

“You did this. Why do you get to cry?” I seethe. His words, “I kissed her,” play over and over in my mind. I bury my face in my hands, trying to rid my mind of those awful words. I knew he’d hurt me. Why am I so surprised about this? I wasn’t expecting this forever love, but I also wasn’t expecting him to hurt me like he did.

“I-I don’t get to cry. I don’t deserve you. I fucked up. Royally.” He stutters through his words. He opens his mouth like he wants to say something every now and then but then he shuts it again, knowing there is no right words to say. There will never be any right words to say. Nothing he can say will take away this heart wrenching pain.

More tears stream down his cheeks. He looks away, wiping his face every time more fall. This is the first time I’ve ever seen him cry. It makes this whole situation so much worse. “I don’t know why I did it. Commitment issues? Fear? I don’t know..” He trails off in thought and I scoff at the pitiful attempt to explain why he would do something so cruel to someone he claims to love so much. He doesn’t get to cry, and he certainly doesn’t deserve me. What he does deserve is the guilt gnawing at him. He deserves that fiery regret. He deserves the pain that I will inflict on him when I tell him I will never love him again. I can’t love him again. Not after he kissed another woman when he promised he was mine. But who knows if he’ll even care.

“There’s no more to say and you can’t take back what you did. S’all just a waste now.” I whisper the last part, knowing he would’ve heard the pain in my voice if I had said it normally. “No-no, y/n, don’t say it’s a waste. It’s not a waste. I love you. I love you more than anything. It was one stupid, drunken kiss. She meant nothing!” His voice breaks more and more as he tries to salvage this broken relationship.

He starts to pace around the small apartment running his ring clad fingers through his hair. The dim lights add to the somber mood, but it also helps. Not being able to see every pained expression on his face. Him not being able to see mine as well.

“I can fix this. S’all gonna be okay. I love you, baby. Let me try, please.” He says coming to the couch and kneeling, cupping my tear soaked face. I grab his warm hands and put them at his sides. He looks down and sniffles. Whimpers escape my lips at the sight of him being in pain. But I shouldn’t feel sorry for him.

“You can’t fix it. It’s done and over with. A drunk mind speaks a sober heart after all.” He looks up at me with a somber expression. Tears keep spilling out of his eyes like a never ending river. I close my eyes, stopping myself from wiping the sadness off of his face.

“But I love you. So so much. It was so stupid of me. Please.” He whispers. He grabs my hands and kisses them. He starts kissing my knuckles and up my arms. Leaving a trail of tears and wet kisses all the way up to my jawline. “We’ve only kissed once and it was a quick peck. She’s out of my life completely. I only want you.” His soft lips move against my burning skin as he says that and I allow a whimper to escape.

“I feel like you should leave,” I say just above a whisper. He looks up at me, eyes wide. “No. No, I can’t. Y/n, I want to fix this. I need to fix this. I need you. I can’t lose you.”

“But you can’t!” I exclaim, taking his hands in mine and shaking them for emphasis. “You obviously wanted her a little bit! I know you love me, I do know that. It’s very evident. But not enough to keep me. And you made that quite clear.”

“I don’t know what happened! I wasn’t sober and it just happened. It meant nothing!” He breaks.

“I can’t do this right now. I just...I can’t. I can’t even think straight. I need time to calm down. And to really consider if you mean what you’re saying right now. I can’t just forgive you like that. As much as I want to because I love you more than anything. But I can’t.” I start to sob. “You have to give me time. M’not in the right headspace to make a decision right now.”

He only nods and stands up, readying himself to pack his things to stay somewhere alone. Or so I hope. He huffs and sniffles from time to time while gathering his things and I try my hardest to ignore him.

“You know I love you. So much.” He sighs.

“I know.”

[losfacedevil]

We’re  Making All The Same Mistakes// Jaylos Angst/Fluff

a/n~ These boys have my heart, that is all. Also I changed one prompt a weeee bit!

Requested: By @fleekybrowsss​ Prompts:  “Are you serious?” “I made a mistake.” “Yell, scream, cry, please, just say something, anything.”

Chuckles erupted from both boys as the television screen went blank for the hundredth time; the leader of the two falling off a cliff and taking his mate with him. The younger boy sighed as the older chuckled, both leaning back against the couch as they rested the game controllers  in their laps.

“You know, you’re really bad at this, Jay.” The older boy chuckled again, reaching over and rustling the gleaming white hair that sat atop the younger boys head. “You can’t rush perfection, de Vil.” The younger boy shook his head, leaning over as Jay reached out and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, pulling his closer. “Who said you were anywhere near perfect?” The younger boy quipped, brows raised as his gaze met the older boy’s. Jay chuckled again, shaking his head before pressing a chaste kiss to the younger boys forehead. “Are you serious, Los? You’re really going to question my perfection?” Jay asked, pulling his arm back as the game they were playing flashed back up on the television screen.

A comfortable silence fell over the boys as they started up the failed mission once more. Chuckles erupted from both of them as they tried to fight off invaders who were keen to get their gear.  Jay knew to follow Carlos’ lead - after all the boy had already beaten the game - and sighed as he watched the younger boys character clear a tricky jump. The older boy lead his character back a few feet before running at full speed only to miss the jump by a fraction of an itch. Carlos chuckled, shaking his head as he delivered an elbow jab to Jays rib cage.

“C’mon pretty boy, do better.” Carlos teased; knew exactly what he was getting into as the pet name slipped past his lips. The clatter of the game controllers hitting the floor was all that was heard as the older boy took the younger boy into a headlock, tossing him sideways onto the couch.

“What was that, de Vil? You challenging me?” The younger boy erupted in laughter, shaking his head slightly as the older boy dug his knuckles into his hair.  “I’m just sayin’ do better man! You suck so bad at half of these missions.” “I told you, you can’t rush perfection, Los.” The younger boy chuckled, digging his fingers into the sensitive skin at Jays sides, earning him chuckles one could mistake for giggles. “I just said do better, pretty boy.” The older boy rested his body weight on the younger boy;  reveling in the puff of air that ghosted against his neck. “Them fighting words, Freckles, and you know it.” Carlos chuckled, pushing lighting against the older boys shoulders to move him slightly. “The only fighting you should be doing is in the game so we can finally beat it tag teaming.” He chuckled.

The younger boy had a one track kind of mind; wasn’t big on picking up any kind of hints. Jay sighed, knew trying to change the subject at hand probably wouldn’t have worked but thought it was worth a shot. The older boy let his finger trail down the younger boys jawline, pressing a quick kiss to the tip of his nose.

“The mission is stupid anyway.” the older boy chuckled, the game long gone from his mind. “The whole point of the mission was to get to the bonfire and get the gold! Gosh maybe you’ll never be good enough to get the gold, you goof.”

Darkness shaded the older boys eyes as he pushed off of the younger boy, anger seeping through his veins. Sitting up, the younger boy rubbed his nose against the older boys jawline - unaware he had done anything wrong.

“I can’t believe you just fucking said that.” Pushing Carlos away Jay stood, making his way to the door in three swift strides. A hurt expression over took the younger boys features, cocking his head to the side he watched as the older boy yanked it open. “What the fuck is wrong with you, Carlos?” The sound of his name slipping past the older boys lips stung like the lit head of a cigarette to his skin. “What did I...? Jay!” He trailed off in favor of calling after the older boy.

Carlos leaned back against the couch, scrubbing his hands over his face as he started to think about the previous few minutes. A sigh escaped him as he picked up the forgotten game controllers; their conversation playing over in his mind. A wave of realization washed over the younger boy as the last sentence he had muttered replayed in his mind.

‘You’ll never be good enough to get the gold.’

The game controllers clattered to the floor once more as Carlos stood, fear and nervous energy coursing through him. Making his way for the door he grabbed the nearest sweatshirt - one that happened to be Jays - and pulled it onto his own frame.

“Shit, shit, shit, I made a mistake.”

~*~*~*~*

Carlos knew exactly where to find the older boy, quickly jogging from the dorms down to the tourney field. It was always where Jay went when he needed to blow off some steam or when someone - in this case his air brained boyfriend- pissed him off. The younger boy sighed as he pulled the hood of the sweatshirt up over his head, watching as Jay ran angry laps around the track.

He knew better than to get anywhere close to Jay, remembering how long his head hurt the last time he got in Jays way. Once the older boy was in his groove of angry laps there was no stopping him short - and Carlos had found that out the hard way. Crossing his arms over his chest he stepped onto the track, hoping Jay would spot him with enough time to slow his roll.

“Fuck out of here, de Vil!” The growl in Jays voice evident as he skidded to a stop in front of the smaller boy. “And take my hoodie off, how many times have I told you to wear your own clothes.” The older boy sighed pulling his hands back through his hair to get the strands off of his sweat soaked forehead. “Yours was closer, I had to find you. I made a mistake.” The younger boys voice dropped, the confidence he once had fading as the older boy now stood in front of him.

Jay averted his gaze, eyes never once meeting Carlos’. The younger boy steeled himself as he pulled the hood of off his head, knew this wasn’t going to be easy on either of them. Jays cheeks were flushed, sweat dripping down his forehead from the sheer energy he put into the few laps he had run; hadn’t expected the younger boy to come find him. Carlos sighed, reaching up to grip at his hair.  

“I fucked up. I... I didn’t realize something so stupid would hit a nerve, but I should have. I shouldn’t have been so fucking stupid. Jay, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. It was meant to be a stupid jab at how ridiculously you suck at that game. But I hurt you and I’m an ass and ugh. I’m so sorry, I really am.”

The younger boy pulled his gaze back to the older boys face -having been unaware it had drifted- as shock sunk in. He wasn’t sure what he was seeing as he watched the older boy pull his bottom lip between his teeth. His resolve had broken; all bad boy persona out the window as tears started to fall down his face.

“Uh, Jay?” The younger boys eyes widened as he took in the broken boy before him. Gone was the anger he was just exuding as heartbreak and sadness replaced it. Carlos began to panic as an audible sob slipped past the older boys lips. Jay sunk to the ground as he brought his hands to his face in a feeble attempt to hide the emotions he didn’t quite understand. “Jay, what the hell? What’s wrong?” The younger boy sat in front of the older boy, gently placing a hand on the older boys shoulder. Jay jerked away somewhat violently, his balance failing him as he crashed sideways on the ground. “What the fuck, Jay? Yell, scream, I don’t care what, please, just say something, anything.”

The younger boy felt tears well up in his eyes - cursed himself for his empathetic ways - as he watched his other half fall apart before him. A shaky breath slipped past the younger boys lips as he sniffled, hand finding the older boys side as he stayed laid out on the ground.

Emotions were something they hid, something that was only meant to be expressed when they were alone. Carlos knee Jay was soft, had heard the boy sniffling behind the closed bathroom door many nights. But never had he expected Jay to display any emotion but anger and happiness towards him.

“I fucking hate you.” The statement was spoken softly, almost as if Carlos wasn’t meant to hear it. The younger boy snapped out of his thoughts, eyes drawn to Jays bloodshot red ones. “Excuse me?” He wasn’t sure he heard right. “I said, I fucking hate you, de Vil.” The older boy muttered again, pushing Carlos’ hand off of his side as he sat up quickly. The anger that was once replaced with sadness fired back up behind the older boys eyes. Reaching forward he pushed the younger boys shoulders causing him to fall, his back connecting with the ground. In two swift movement the older boy was hovering over the younger boy; one of Jays hands pinning Carlos’ above his head by the wrists. “Fuck you and your stupid fucking comments. I hate you so goddamn much... but in the best way possible.”

The younger boy screwed up his face as he watched the older boy, unsure if his statement made any real sense. Jay sighed, his resolve breaking for the second time that day as he reached for Carlos’ face and traced his fingers down the younger boy’s jawline.

“How can you hate someone in the best way possible? That makes no sense, Jay.” The older boy chuckled, his anger slowly dissipating as the younger boys innocence seeped into him. He knew Carlos well enough to know the boy hadn’t meant any harm with his comment, he just got caught up in his mind more often than not. “Care to answer me? How does one hate someone in the best way possible.” Jay chuckled again, gripping Carlos’ chin so he couldn’t move his head again. “Just shut up and kiss me, de Vil.” Carlos chuckled this time, pushing up against the hold Jay had on his hands. “I would but yknow I can’t move.” Jay rolled his eyes, leaning to close the small distance between them. “Just do as I say.” Carlos chuckled again, lifting his head ever so slightly as his teeth nipped at Jays bottom lip. “Whatever you say, Alpha.”

[zimbyplays]

 100 Questions No One Ever Asks

i was tagged by two lovelies - @stardustsim​, @edgypandasimmer​, and @carmysims and i’m not feeling all too well right now but i figure why not.

1. DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR CLOSET DOORS OPEN OR CLOSED? Open. I used to sleep with them closed but then when I was younger and still had a dog, he would hop up on my bed and get ready for sleep, then stop and start growling at the closet. Frickin’ TERRIFYING. Eventually I found out it was a hanging mirror that he kept seeing himself in, but I’ve slept with the doors open since.

2. DO YOU TAKE THE SHAMPOOS AND CONDITIONER BOTTLES FROM HOTELS? ALWAYS, but I never use em...

3. DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR SHEETS TUCKED IN OR OUT? never tucked in. I hate feeling trapped. Hands and feet always out of sheet or blanket

4. HAVE YOU STOLEN A STREET SIGN BEFORE? ...shhhhhh (yes)

5. DO YOU LIKE TO USE POST-IT NOTES? I LOVE using post-its! But I rarely use em. They show up a lil in my sims legacy notebook tho!

6. DO YOU CUT OUT COUPONS BUT THEN NEVER USE THEM? I used to try coupons but I got lazy

7. WOULD YOU RATHER BE ATTACKED BY A BIG BEAR OR A SWARM OF BEES? Bear please. Let my death be quick. And not like the bear attack in The Revenant.

8. DO YOU HAVE FRECKLES? nope

9. DO YOU ALWAYS SMILE FOR PICTURES? most of the time they’re forced smiles, but that counts right

10. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? ...idiots?

11. DO YOU EVER COUNT YOUR STEPS WHEN YOU WALK? not in a long time

12. HAVE YOU PEED IN THE WOODS? nope, I have literally gone 3 days limiting my food/drink intake so that I could go without using the bathroom to avoid such things

13. HAVE YOU EVER POOPED IN THE WOODS? nope, see 12

14. DO YOU EVER DANCE EVEN IF THERE’S NO MUSIC PLAYING? All the time

15. DO YOU CHEW YOUR PENS AND PENCILS? ew no

16. HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU SLEPT WITH THIS WEEK?

do you mean sleep like *

winky wink

* or just like, actual

sleep

? Cuz if it’s the second one, then 1.

17. WHAT SIZE IS YOUR BED? king

18. WHAT IS YOUR SONG OF THE WEEK? “Whistle While I Work It”

19. IS IT OK FOR GUYS TO WEAR PINK? uh yeah, why wouldn’t it be

20. DO YOU STILL WATCH CARTOONS? Not really a fan of cartoons, except MLP:FIM. 

21. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE MOVIE? Least favorite... which means it’s a fave but not as much of one... right? Or do you mean most HATED?? Least favorite I guess is District 9 Most HATED is I Know Who Killed Me 

22. WHERE WOULD YOU BURY HIDDEN TREASURE IF YOU HAD SOME? Doesn’t matter, I wouldn’t remember where anyhow

23. WHAT DO YOU DRINK WITH DINNER? Sparkling water or maybe a clear soda like Sprite

24. WHAT DO YOU DIP A CHICKEN NUGGET IN? I like ‘em alone, or with honey mustard

25. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD? Chicken

26. WHAT MOVIES COULD YOU WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND STILL LOVE? This list is too long. I literally have dozens of movies where I can literally press “restart” on as soon as it ends and never be tired of it ever. Off the top of my head: What’s Your Number, The Birdcage, Two Night Stand, Ratatouille

27. LAST PERSON YOU KISSED/KISSED YOU? My lovely boyfriend

28. WERE YOU EVER A BOY/GIRL SCOUT? nope

29. WOULD YOU EVER STRIP OR POSE NUDE IN A MAGAZINE? hell no - nothing against others who choose to, but I never would

30. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A LETTER TO SOMEONE ON PAPER? Does like, a card count? Few months ago maybe? If you mean an actual letter tho, it’s been a couple years since I’ve lost touch with my pen pals

31. CAN YOU CHANGE THE OIL ON A CAR? nope but i might be able to figure it out

32. EVER GOTTEN A SPEEDING TICKET? nope. I’ve been pulled over for speeding twice, but they both let me go with warnings

33. EVER RAN OUT OF GAS? yes

34. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE KIND OF SANDWICH? does a burger count? I’m a fan of burgers. If not, then I dunno, it changes based on my mood/craving. I had a deviled ham sandwich recently that was pretty tasty. 

35. BEST THING TO EAT FOR BREAKFAST? eggs benedict.

36. WHAT IS YOUR USUAL BEDTIME? it varies all the time

37. ARE YOU LAZY? Yes. 

38. WHEN YOU WERE A KID, WHAT DID YOU DRESS UP AS FOR HALLOWEEN? I was a witch 3 or 4 times, a fairy, a ninja turtle, a bride, Princess Leia, a power ranger...

39. WHAT IS YOUR CHINESE ASTROLOGICAL SIGN? Ox I think

40. HOW MANY LANGUAGES CAN YOU SPEAK? just the one

41. DO YOU HAVE ANY MAGAZINE SUBSCRIPTIONS? Yes, to Shape and um... Women’s... Journal? I dunno they were free. Thanks T-Mobile Tuesdays

42. WHICH ARE BETTER: LEGOS OR LINCOLN LOGS? OMG I used to looove lincoln logs. ♥ ♥ ♥

43. ARE YOU STUBBORN? absolutely

44. WHO IS BETTER: LENO OR LETTERMAN? well this is a dated question... Leno. Used to love him. Letterman would literally put me to sleep he was so boring.

45. EVER WATCH SOAP OPERAS? Not unless you count WWE... I used to watch that until I was 14 or so, I used to call it a “manly man’s soap opera” cuz ooo-weeee the drama. 

46. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? Yes.

47. DO YOU SING IN THE CAR? Yes. But my singing volume coincides with the radio volume. I always sing one notch quieter than the radio. Unless I’m alone in the car. Then it’s anything goes.

48. DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER? Only if I’m playing music

49. DO YOU DANCE IN THE CAR? not really... I mean... well okay sometimes

50. EVER USED A GUN? nope

51. LAST TIME YOU GOT A PORTRAIT TAKEN BY A PHOTOGRAPHER? five years ago. At my brother’s wedding.

52. DO YOU THINK MUSICALS ARE CHEESY? of course, but that doesn’t make me love them less

53. IS CHRISTMAS STRESSFUL? Yes.

54. EVER EAT A PIEROGI? yeah... wasn’t impressed

55. FAVORITE TYPE OF FRUIT PIE? hmmm.... HMMMM.... I mean I love pumpkin pie with all my heart, but apple is a close second

56. OCCUPATIONS YOU WANTED TO BE WHEN YOU WERE A KID? paleontologist. Thanks Jurassic Park.

57. DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS? nope, unless you count the ones in the Sims. Those shits exist for sure.

58. EVER HAVE A DEJA-VU FEELING? yep

59. DO YOU TAKE A VITAMIN DAILY? hahahaha, no

60. DO YOU WEAR SLIPPERS? only if I’m sick and cold

61. DO YOU WEAR A BATH ROBE? only if I need to use the bathroom in the middle of the night

62. WHAT DO YOU WEAR TO BED? undies

63. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CONCERT? NSYNC

64. WALMART, TARGET, OR KMART? Walmart

65. NIKE OR ADIDAS? bitch I said walmart, I can’t afford either of those brands

66. CHEETOS OR FRITOS? cheetos

67. PEANUTS OR SUNFLOWER SEEDS? sunflower seeds

68. EVER HEAR OF THE GROUP TRES BIEN? uh no

69. EVER TAKE DANCE LESSONS? nope

70. IS THERE A PROFESSION YOU PICTURE YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE DOING? something in physics?

71. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? sure

72. EVER WON A SPELLING BEE? Nope, I got third place once

73. HAVE YOU EVER CRIED BECAUSE YOU WERE SO HAPPY? Of course, I cry at the drop of a hat I swear. There are 30 second commercials that will bring me to tears.

74. OWN ANY RECORD ALBUMS? nope

75. OWN A RECORD PLAYER? nope

76. DO YOU REGULARLY BURN INCENSE? hate the smell of incense

77. EVER BEEN IN LOVE? Yes.

78. WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE IN CONCERT? seriously I’m not picky, I just wanna go 

79. WHAT WAS THE LAST CONCERT YOU SAW? Journey with Steve Miller Band

80. HOT TEA OR COLD TEA? Hot tea

81. TEA OR COFFEE? Tea usually, tho sometimes I just need coffee

82. SUGAR COOKIES OR SNICKERDOODLES? hate sugar cookies, never had a snickerdoodle

83. CAN YOU SWIM WELL? not really

84. CAN YOU HOLD YOUR BREATH WITHOUT HOLDING YOUR NOSE? yeah

85. ARE YOU PATIENT? I lack patience

86. DJ OR BAND AT A WEDDING? DJ! I’m so against Bands at weddings but boyfriend wants a band and I’m like NOOOOOO. That might be because I spent a few years as a wedding DJ tho

87. EVER WON A CONTEST? sure

88. HAVE YOU EVER HAD PLASTIC SURGERY? lol no i can’t afford that

89. WHICH ARE BETTER: BLACK OR GREEN OLIVES? black

90. CAN YOU KNIT OR CROCHET? i’ve learned the basics for both, but have the patience for neither

91. BEST ROOM FOR A FIREPLACE? Living room

92. DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED? yes

93. IF MARRIED, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED? not married

94. WHO WAS YOUR HIGH SCHOOL CRUSH? hmm... well freshman year I saw our school production of Peter Pan and Peter was played by a Senior named Herman and I guess I like a guy in tights cuz DAYUMMMM. Of course, he graduated that year. So that was the end of that.

95. DO YOU CRY AND THROW A FIT UNTIL YOU GET YOUR OWN WAY? lol, no. but I will cry and throw a fit...

96. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Nope

97. DO YOU WANT KIDS? yeh

98. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR? green!

99. DO YOU MISS ANYONE RIGHT NOW? sure

100. WHO ARE YOU GOING TO TAG TO DO THIS TAG NEXT? NOBODY!!! Okay maybe @simplysims27​, and @sweetsugarspnsims​, and ANYONE ELSE WHO WANTS TO WASTE WAY TOO MUCH TIME ANSWERING ALL THESE QUESTIONS LIKE WTF I CAN’T BELIEVE I HAD THE PATIENCE FOR THIS

[btscloudy]

I got tagged by @mintycoolnessisrelevant (btw if you like voltron, skam, or laughter u should follow her) and thank u ^.^ Rules: tag 20 people you’d like to know better

Nickname: jay

Zodiac sign: Gemini 

Height: 5′7

Last Thing You Google: And then there were none, the book i was checking my sanity cuz i swore ive read that book before and turns out yes i have. its good btw if ur looking for a book to read, its pretty classic

Favorite music artist: bts (duh lol)

Song stuck in my head: born singer by bts, idk why it just poped in my head today

Last movie you watched: oh gosh idk...uh....i dont remember, its been a while

What are you wearing right now: grey sweats, green t-shirt, blue hoodie

Why did you choose your URL: was originally jaycloudy, cuz one of my nicknames is jay and i liked jc caylin at the time hence the cloud. Then i changes it to btscloudy when i became a bts blog. weeee story time lol

Do you have any other blogs: nope just this one

What Did Your Last Relationship Teach You: teach me? uh, that its not that hard to let go of someone if ur not that invested. lol that sounds terrible

Religious or Spiritual: nope

Favorite Color: Pink :3 and then pretty much pastel anything

Average Hours Of Sleep: bout 7 on weekdays and 8 or 9 on weekends

Lucky Number: 2, i mean ive always said 2 but it really isnt anything special to me

Favorite characters: chandler from friends, bts fanfic characters lol i dont get out much

How Many Blankets Do you Sleep With: sheet, comforter, blanket, and usually my jacket thrown on top. ..... i get cold

Dream Job: dream, like eating food on camera and getting paid. ik thats like dirty or something but can u imagine just eating, making faces, maybe talking, and getting money. yup. what i actually want to be tho is a physical therapist :)

I’m only gonna tag a few because idk 20 people(idk 5 but):

@fear-humans-not-wolves (i like u), @foreverevereverever (i like u to, ur a cool bean), @minyoong-ii (u seem nice and ur pretty), @awkwardlyjin (we have like never made any contact but i like u and ur blog).

you guys dont have to do it if u dont want to, but i would love to know more about yall :D

[chandelierslayer]

So... I also noticed while going through my archive that I tend to reblog other people’s stuff and go on huge rants/rambles/analysis-fests, while still piggybacking on their stuff, instead of making a whole new post. So I figured I’d fix that while I’m at it. I meant to start this sooner but NaNoWriMo has me pretty preoccupied. And I was sleeping way too much for a while. BUT ANYWAY ENOUGH ABOUT MY PERSONAL LIFE. Here’s the big rant about Zelda and how much I care for her (even though hearing her speak irritates me):

Also, keep in mind that this is in regards to the end of BotW, so if you don’t want spoilers... Well, I tagged this as spoilers so yeah.

I hate that she only talked about Link and Ganon and the fate of Hyrule etc. Just once, I wanted to hear her say ……

…..Actually, I don’t know what I wanted to hear her say. I don’t know. In all honesty, I just wanted to hug her. Like. I just want to sit her down and hug her and be like NO girlfriend, let’s talk about YOU for a minute. I’m gonna make you some fruitcake and tea and we’re gonna just chill and you can cry it out as much as you need to or whatever, just focus on YOURSELF for a minute.

You’ve been locked in this situation of keeping the reincarnation of the demon king sealed away so he can’t hurt anyone for a hundred years. A HUNDRED YEARS. 100 YEARS. There’s no way that was easy, even WITH the power of the Goddess and the Light Force and the Triforce of Wisdom (um… Triforce? It looked like the whole thing when she killed him. Are we departing from the “each of these three people gets one” system? ANYWAY). I can’t even begin to imagine what that would be like. How did your mind stay intact, honestly? I just.

You gave up everything. You wanted to have a fulfilled life, chasing your dreams, being a total fucking nerd and studying the things that fascinated you. You had goals. You had a life. And when the signs of the Calamity showed up you jumped to the task willingly, thinking “Oh yeah, my knowledge of ancient shit is gonna help us save the world, this is gonna be great” but then your dad forced you to leave that behind and go try to awaken the power of your bloodline. And you went. It was the RIGHT decision, because that power would be needed to take down Ganon, but that doesn’t make it FAIR. In ten seconds flat you went from happy kid studying things she loved for fun, to stressed-out kid beating herself up relentlessly because no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t feel the sacred power, couldn’t do the ONE THING that was expected of her, the one thing that could help her save the world. You took the weight of the world on your shoulders, literally, and even when your power finally awakened, you STILL felt like a failure because it was too little, too late. Your champions had all fallen, including your knight. You had to go take on the demon king. Alone. And a hundred years later when everything’s over you’re like “I’ve been watching over you all this time” like wtf get out of town are you serious right now? You didn’t even think about yourself, you just. I’m crying right now, y’all, for real. Oh my gosh. This woman.

Okay now that my face is dry…

I’m not even gonna BEGIN to get into how much I hate that Sacrifice at the Expense of the Self is always portrayed in shit as this great amazing noble thing because it’s BULLSHIT, it’s NOT noble, it’s fucking STUPID, and I get that in this case she had no choice BUT to sacrifice everything to save the world etc. because she was literally the only one, but PEOPLE WRITE SCENARIOS LIKE THAT ALL THE EFFING TIME. Especially with female characters. Like. You have a CHOICE. The people who wrote this story had a CHOICE, and they CHOSE to go this route. …Oh look, I said I wouldn’t go into it, and here I am, going into it.

Seriously though, I’m glad this was a Zelda who actually DID THINGS (there are more of them than people think), but I hate that her doing things happened at the expense of herself. Her life. Even before she lost her dad and saw her kingdom torn to pieces, she had to turn away from the things she loved and her very way of life as she knew it to chase some faerie tale she wasn’t even sure would work. Nothing is of her own agency, except that one final decision, once everyone else had fallen and her power was finally awakened, to walk back up to the castle and imprison Ganon by herself. And I mean. Hah. Right. “Decision”. Like she really had a choice in the matter. That moment is the most bittersweet. I just. UGH.

Zelda never really gets to shine without being diminished in some way. The Zeldas in the first three games (And ALBW) were just there to be rescued, the Zelda in Ocarina of Time got to help out a ton while in disguise (via cross-dressing! A++) but once she reveals her pink-dress-wearing, non-ninja self she’s reduced to yet another DiD. And an overly helpless one at that, for the sake of a last-minute race against the clock challenge. I mean, you can blast Ganon with a huge-ass beam of light, and lift up iron bars like it’s nothing, but you can’t dispel some flames and kill some basic monsters? I call bullshit. Oracles Zelda was only there for the linked game ending so the bad guys could try to sacrifice her to resurrect Ganon (weeee), and the Zeldas in the Four Swords trilogy were hardly there. WW and TP’s Zeldas are finally badass, though, the one in TP was forced to surrender her rule to a usurper king and sit by quietly - though she did get to do stuff later in the game. Tetra, on the other hand, was a badass pirate captain. Buuuuuut once her identity is revealed, again, she’s reduced to Princess Form, even having her clothes change magically from pirate garb to a pink dress (is that… did you put MAKEUP on her? With MAGIC? That’s not her skin tone! UGH.) for no reason whatsoever. What makes me happy is that in Phantom Hourglass, she’s gone back to her pirate threads and refuses to be called a princess. And rightly so! The world in which she was a child of the royal family is gone now, sealed beneath the ocean forever. She never knew that world. The Great Sea is where she’s really from. Just because you have a bloodline doesn’t mean anything, it doesn’t change who you are. Thank you for letting her be herself, Nintendo. YES I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS ABOUT THIS.

Spirit Tracks Zelda probly did the most out of them all, because she came along on the journey the whole way, albeit as a ghost most of the time (it’s a long story). And SS Zelda is another self-sacrifice person. Impa’s like “Lemme explain what happened forever ago and who you are and what you need to do and why” and she’s just like “Okay!” and does all the things. No second-guessing, no complaining, she just goes on this long journey and eventually seals herself away to save the world (please tell me this is not gonna become the trend) with nothing but faith that it’s gonna work out. I just.

YOU ARE SUCH A GOOD CHILD FOR SAVING THE WORLD AND DOING WHAT’S RIGHT BUT YOU ARE A PERSON TOO AND YOU MATTER AND YOUR THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS MATTER AND YOU DESERVE TO CARE ABOUT YOURSELF AND I LOVE YOU AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING ANYMORE IT’S LATE AND I NEED TO GO TO BED I HAVE WORK IN THE MORNING BUT PLEASE CHILD JUST TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF OKAY?

Here, have some old tags, just because they add to the ranting:

Zelda, The Legend of Zelda, spoilers, ranting, rambling, thoughts, sacrifice, self-sacrifice, writing talk, female characters, tropes, Damsel in Distress, crying all over my damn keyboard, WHY CAN'T A FEMALE CHARACTER JUST SHINE WITHOUT BEING DIMINISHED OR DEGRADED IN SOME WAY???, NINTENDO YOU'RE BETTER THAN THIS, YOU DO WELL, YOU DO SOME REALLY GREAT THINGS, BUT YOU NEED TO WORK ON THIS SHIT OKAY?, I'M SERIOUS, I'M LOOKING AT YOU TOO SQUARE ENIX, KAIRI LITERALLY JUST EXISTS TO BE FOUGHT OVER SACRIFICED FOR OR TO JUST SIT THERE AND WAIT OR BE IMPRISONED ETC., IF I CAN'T PLAY AS KAIRI IN KINGDOM HEARTS THREE I'M GONNA FLIP ALL THE TABLES, YOU TOO DIGIMON, DON'T THINK I DON'T SEE YOU STILL FAILING IN THE FEMALE REPRESENTATION ARENA AFTER SEVEN FUCKING SEASONS, YOU HAVE HAD SO MUCH TIME, COME ON, APPLIMONSTERS IS AMAZING AND I LOVE IT BUT GIVE ME MORE FEMALE CHARACTERS, AND LET ERI-SAMA ACTUALLY PUNCH SOMEONE, FUCK, I'M TIRED OF HEARING ABOUT DOKA-PUNCHES AND SEEING NOTHING