#i really need to write more bc i haven't touched most of these fics in months and will likely never finish them

[hootyhoowoo]

ah! I totally get keeping your ao3 private! in any case, do you have any svsss fic recs you’d shout out? any ships is fine! bingqiu, Liujiu, 79, Liushen, I’ll take it!

Okay i'm sorry this took so long!! I was trying to look through my fics and see what would be appropriate to post bwaahahah

So disclaimer, i'm more of a one-shot type of reader for the most part, I really enjoy a nice hearty and wordy piece. I'm also a whore so I enjoy a lot of pwps!! I delve into omegaverse and some dead dove fics a lot too so please READ THE TAGS before reading

Also, these are more of my own personal reviews of the fics? You can read the summaries +tags to find out more :D I'm sure the authors can summarize better than I can

but anyway, I'll start out with the fics recommended to me by others, and ones that are so widely loved by the fandom!

These are multi-chaptered:

"I Wish You Were My Husband"- Feynite; Bingqiu, Liushen, and Qijiu all in one!

This fic was recommended by a good friend of mine, and it is sooo good anon. It's got wife stealing, love triangles, and is sooo hilariously funny it's made me genuinely laugh out loud while reading. There was times where I felt like I was just reading canon content and had to remind myself this wasn't mxtx writing. The author does a wonderful job in delving into Shen Qingqiu/Shen Yuan's inner mental gymnastics, and the complicated history and relationships between the different pairings is so tangible and well done. Not to mention the dialogue between SQQ and SQH made me CACKLE.

"Like A Tooth From a Mouth (I Leave A Hole)- Anonymous; Bingyuan (?)

Okay I started this fic but still haven't gotten through all of it, but the first chapter (first few paragraphs really) captivated me so much I was instantly hooked. Actually, I may draw this out at some point bc I really love the beginning of this fic. So angsty. So well written- especially once Liu Qingge gets introduced, he's so cute and I really like the dynamics of everyone in this one. Disciple!Shen yuan with his system and Shizun!Luo Binghe will always be messy and i'm here for it <3

"Shen Yuan of No Relation"- Gemi ; Bingyuan, Qijiu (i'll probably come back and edit if needed)

Ahhh. Ze fic of all time. OKAY so I haven't actually finished this one yet, i'm currently still reading. BUT I WILL SAY: It is so good so far. So good. The author's writing feels so hearty and their descriptions of the setting is something I fell in love with immediately. The way they write the characters is very endearing and i'm giddy with excitement to continue to read c: This fic was very very recommended by multiple friends so i'm happy to finally start it!!

"Love in Another Shape"- Celardor ; Starts Liushen -> Bingliu -> Bingliushen

Okay this fic was recommended to me by the same person who recommended IWYWMH so you know this shit is bangin. I have not read this yet, but I have had many people gush about it to me and had the lovely opportunity to chat w the author and they are the sweetest person so I'm very excited to start it next!!

'Satisfaction'- Raiiskaim ; Bingjiu

ohohoho ok- can I just say I love Raiiskaim's works, but this one is soooo delicious. It's got dead-dove like elements so be warned, but ahhh the follow up to this fic is "Discontent, and the spaces inbetween" and dude omg the ending literally made me gasp. Can't recommend this enough if it's your flavor.

"Blessing in disguise" - chamsie; ...implied Qijiu?

yeah i like omegaverse and i will not be shamed about it on my own blog. BUT this one is not...your typical pwp omegaverse fic. It's very shen jiu centered around him and his babby- shen yuan! it's very cute and good and I quite enjoyed it when I read it a whiiiile ago. Actually, I think it's time for a re-read. heh

-

These next ones are one shots

"We Should Stick Together" and "You're My Best Friend, I'll Love You Forever" - Pennydaniels; Liujiu

ohhhh my god. OHHHH MY GOOOOODDDD. Do you ever read a fic and have it touch something so deeply in you and it's like a soothing balm to a really rough aching burn? yeah so that's how these two fics are to me. I vividly remember reading them on an airplane and literally crying my eyes out I had to ask the flight attendant for tissues- and got side eyed by the other passengers. Specifically YMBF,ILYF.... this fic definitely shaped the way I would like to be loved. Excellent works, definitely recommend, read tags, as always. Pennydaniels is one of my fav ao3 authors, so definitely recommend checking out their other stuff too!

"Through the Widening Circles"- ancient_moonshine ; Bingjiu

Please read tags. It didn't bother me but ik it may not be everyone's flavor- but trust me when I say that this fic also made me sob like a baby, especially towards the end. The author does a great job of navigating through trauma and healing in such a touching way, but it is a pretty heavy fic because of these delicate topics. Such a good read, and I think one of my first SVSSS fanfics too!

"Vedaniya" - ancient_moonshine ; Bingjiu

Once again another fic by this amazing author, this one is a little more kinky ehehe but it's still very good and there's a gut wrenching scene that gets me every time near the beginning.

Anyways I hope this list satisfies! I can't wait to read more and get recommended more as we keep going on this scummy adventure :D if you have any recs, please be sure to drop them down below or in my inbox :3 always happy to add to my queue of reads.

[ordowrites]

Hey there. I really enjoy your works. I've been feeling really depressed, lonely and hated lately so I need some happy fics. Can I request a fic in which characters try to prove how much they care about the reader by making love to them and fucking them real deep? (My fav is Diluc but I'm happy with any male chara you write.) (If possible, no reader with a vagina. It kinda breaks immersion for me bc my body has a different anatomy.)

No pressure of course! ❤️ I hope you are having a good day

Hey anon, I hope this helps and I hope things start to feel better<3

cw: smut, slight bondage, body worship. diluc is slightly possessive and likes to bite, please forgive him. pet names ("baby", "darling", "my love", "my flame"), some angst, some fluff. hurt/comfort.

amab reader! minors dni, mdni. empty and blank blogs will be blocked.

divider by @/enchanthings!

"Too tight?" His voice is warm as he looms over you, a gloved hand running over your torso - making all the mental notes of fading hickies from the last time you two had made love, and he bends down and gives a soft bite to your chest, his hair tickling you a bit and you wiggle.

"'s fine," you mumble and he hums his approval as he starts to pepper kisses along your chest and lower abdomen. "You overthink these things." Or maybe, you think, I don't want to be showered in such tenderness. The feeling like you don't deserve such gentle touches and warm looks settles in the pit of your stomach again, a feeling you haven't been able to shake off for some time now, and you feel guilty for it - especially when he looks at you with those red eyes you always get lost in. It's automatic for you to pull at the silk bindings, always marveling in how soft they are and for a brief moment, your wedding ring catches the light of the candle and you're reminded that he married you of all people.

And there's that feeling again - it makes your stomach lurch and settles in a space between sadness and warmth. He keeps you warm and burning, always but you're not sure what you do for him. Most days, you often wonder if he loves you or if he's playing some long con game. Diluc always says he loves you, showers you with expensive gifts that you do adore - truly you do - and once gifted you a sword he commissioned from a very well known blacksmith in Fontaine. He also commissioned you a polearm - having taken notice that you had gotten interested in learning how use one. (And yet, you still wonder...)

Diluc gives a little hum. "Perhaps I just want to make sure the man I love isn't in any pain." Despite his words, he still pinches a nipple relishing in the soft gasp you give. "Is that so wrong of me, my love?" He sighs a little bit. "Baby, look at me." He grips your chin now, and you feel something rush through you and down to your cock that you can't help but arch upward a little bit to silently tell him what you want. For someone who claims to want to be sweet and loving, Diluc sure is not listening. Finally, your eyes meet his - your face a bit more red and he smiles, pleased. "Good boy."

With those two words, he captures your lips - a bit rougher this time as long as he possibly can while he fumbles to remove his own clothes.

You two break apart. You breathe hard, swallowing a bit.

"I love you," he says, firmly.

"I love you too." You answer, easily - watching as he removes his gloves slowly and you bite back a groan as you grind upward. A hand presses against your belly, forcing you down and still. "Diluc, you're taking too long."

"I'm enjoying what's mine," Diluc responds, easily. You fluster more. "Is that so wrong? Last I checked, I am allowed to enjoy my husband and how handsome he looks when he's red and needy." He bends down and bites your neck now, this time, it does cause you pain and you groan. "Do you know why, darling?"

You don't trust yourself to answer that and instead, you look away - to the mirror that sits close by. It dawns on you that you should really move that stupid thing when you have a moment as it keeps startling you in the middle of the night (and Diluc's decorative choices are honestly quite subpar for a man with wealth).

"Look at me," he commands and you snap your gaze back to him. Something about Diluc being so demanding of your attention turns you on more than you'd like to admit. "I asked you a question, my flame. Do you know why I like to take my time with you?"

You should answer - you know you should, but your voice catches in your throat as he starts to bite more at your skin, leaving blossoming purples and blues in his wake, teeth marks - all of these things that remind you of who your lover is. His Vision sits on the bedside table and it glows. You can feel the slightest touch of his flame your skin, but it doesn't burn and it feels good.

His mouth ghosts over your cock for a brief moment, and he grips it - not too firmly - and starts to pepper tender kisses along the hard skin. Diluc worships your cock the way he worships your body, reverence and as if you were a god sent for him to worship. Admittedly, you used to dislike receiving blowjobs from him because he always edges you, always takes his time until you merely a mess beneath him. You pull at your bindings when you feel his throat constrict around your cock and moan as he continues to tease, stroke, suck.

"Ah - Diluc-"

There's a brief moment where you're sure he's going to push you over the edge, but he finally pulls off - lips a mess with saliva and precum and you stare at him with need.

He bites your thigh and you moan even louder. Honestly, whenever you two have sex, you look like you've taken some weird tumble that has teeth. You remember asking him once about it and Diluc didn't seem to quite have answer, except that he simply enjoys marking you up so you remember that he loves you. He had offered to stop but you had told him, no, you don't mind.

Lube is squirted on his fingers liberally and he reaches down, pressing his fingers against your entrance.

"You never answered my question." You can't really apologize for being unable to talk while he was giving you a blowjob.

"My mind was pre-occupied." You quip. "Hard to think when you're the messiest person I met when it comes to oral."

There's a faint smile on his lips and he snorts. "That doesn't sound like a complaint." Diluc muses and you gasp as a finger slips in. "As far as I can tell, you quite enjoy when I get messy." He's not wrong. "Are you ready for me, my darling?"

Your breath catches in your throat as he removes his fingers and you nod. Diluc smiles and presses a kiss to your lips, tender and sweet as he pushes your knees to your chest. He presses the head of his cock to your entrance and you draw in a breath, bracing yourself for his size.

"By the way, I expect you to have answer to my question." The least sexiest thing Diluc can say, but you appreciate his attempt at alleviating how tense you feel as he slowly pushes in.

"I didn't realize sex with you came with homework and reports." You manage to quip out and Diluc laughs, and butterflies flutter in your stomach as you blush. He only ever laughs like that with you, deep, genuine - mirth on his face. "Do I have to also cite my sources?"

"So long as your only source is me." He nips at your lips again before fully hilting himself inside of you. You tug harder at the bindings, feeling as if your breath had been forced out of you. He groans. "So perfect for me." He frees your wrists from their bindings and you immediately wrap your arms around his shoulders, clinging for dear life as he starts to move.

At first, he's gentle with you - like he always starts off, as though he doesn't want to break you. Though he never does, no matter how rough he gets.

It doesn't take long for you to become a mess beneath him, cock aching to be touched as he fucks you as thoroughly as he can - hitting your prostate over and over again. Your cock twitches and you reach down to start stroking yourself off, but his hand pushes yours away and grips your wrists, pinning them above your head.

"Don't make me tie you up again." he groans as he grinds his cock inside of you and you let out a debauched moan, tears pricking at your eyes. "Look how beautiful you are. All for me."

"Nng, Diluc, please-" You gasp out as he hits your prostate again and he is pleased, moving the one hand that had been pinning you wrists above your head down to your twitching, leaking cock. His calloused hand wraps around your cock again and he starts to stroke in time with his thrusts, that hit you deep and make your eyes roll back.

Soon, you're releasing over his hand and your stomach, whining his name again. Diluc follows you not long after, releasing inside of you - but his cock remains, plugging you up.

Tender kisses are peppered along your face, slowly bringing you back down to him.

"Are you okay, my flame?" He murmurs as you slowly open your eyes. You draw in a few deep breath. Diluc's expression is one of love and worship

"Yeah, I'm...I'm fine." you murmur.

He slowly pulls out, some of his cum spilling as he does so. You almost whine at the loss of his cock and his body heat.

"My beloved," he murmurs. "Do you understand now?"

You do have answer, but you can't help but let a little grin form on your lips.

"I'm afraid I need to study a bit longer." you tell him. Diluc's gaze darkens with lust as he grips your hips and forces you on your hands and knees.

"Then I suppose I can help you," he says as he gives your ass a light smack. "I'll show you over and over again until you get it." Diluc's body encases your own, erection pressed against your ass again. "Make sure you know how much I love you and what I love about you until you never doubt me again."

And that is a promise.

[beanarie]

For the ao3 wrapped ask game: 3, 19, and 28!

in the interest of not spamming folks, i'm also including questions requested by anon 1, anon 2, @typicalopposite , @sanguinarysanguinity , and @capitalnineteen

thank you all for letting me yap about what a blast i've been having these past few months.

3- What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

i'll say opioids and antiemetics (where tommy and buck fall through a collapsing floor together). it was my first bucktommy fic and my first fic that wasn't a snippet in over a year. dry spells like that make me feel like i forgot how words work, but it flowed well, i got some of the characters' voices down, and that helped build my confidence again.

5- What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

oh, got my head checked by a jumbo jet (fix-it where buck gets amnesia), holy shit. people have been leaving the loveliest comments. it's been really rewarding because it was a gift for a friend and she liked it a lot. also the angst side of the story stems from some personal stuff as a healthcare-adjacent worker. losing someone you feel partly responsible for is gutting and it fucking sucks every time.

19- What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

i'm extremely ship monogamous and i never know what's gonna trigger my fic-writing lizard brain, so honestly i just wanna keep going with bucktommy. it would be great if fandom could maintain this energy after the hiatus. i haven't been in such a supportive and inspiring environment for a while.

20- Which work of yours have you reread the most?

i reread them all a lot, especially after they get really positive feedback because then it's like "oh hey. that part right there *was* pretty cool".

27- What do you listen to while writing?

just my internal monologue babey. music is too much of a distraction unless i'm at the stage where it's 95% done and all i need is to stitch the holes together

28- Favorite work you wrote this year?

of course (fix-it where they're both in the helicopter when it crashes) is the one i am most likely to have bookmarked if it had been written by someone else. i feel like i executed the near death scene effectively and i managed to touch on tommy's issues while threading in hope that he and buck could get past them together.

29- Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

Evan lays his free hand lightly, ever so lightly, over Tommy's battered heart before leaning forward and pressing their foreheads together. "I'm so proud of you," he whispers. "I asked you not to run, and you stayed."

(when i tell you this PAINS me bc i didn't figure it out fully until after i posted the last bit on here. so there are people who not only read the ending that's slightly worse than this but reblogged it. the subpar version still exists out there. i'm never letting myself post a proper fic on tumblr in its entirety again 😩)

[lovinglin]

I Really Wanna Stay at Your House

Sypnosis: Pico invites Lara to sit down and talk with him. What she didn't expect is the reason for it.

Ship: Pico/Lara 💚🩷

Word Count: 3k

WARNINGS: Hurt/Comfort, Degradation (Pico @ himself, I need to save this man). Not sure what else so lmk!

Happy PicoLara Anniversary!!! The long awaited fic is finally here! Just as a little funfact but this was originally supposed to be a comic but the script got too long bc I kept writing... oops. So it's a fic now! Hope it's a good read still. I haven't written in a long while and this isn't completely proofread but enjoy still 🫶

DNI: prosh1p/comsh1p do not even touch this post.

May 13th, 2024. Monday afternoon. Today was their anniversary, and it was luckily a quiet and slow day. At least it was supposed to.

Pico finds himself seated on the couch, back slouched on the backrest, fiddling his fingers as he was staring at the ceiling. He was feeling nervous.

He wasn't usually like this most of the time, especially on days like these. But today was different, because today, he invited his girlfriend to sit down and talk with him because there was something important he wanted to mention. No, it wasn't about the anniversary– they were both fully aware of that already. It was something more personal to him, something that has been troubling him for quite a while now. He couldn't start on that conversation just yet though, because she wasn't there with him.

She was still in their bathroom cleaning herself up. He had knocked on the door prior to this– asking her to join him on the couch once she was done. She agreed of course, and now he was just waiting for her to finish. But as every second passed by, he was starting to get a little more restless.

He was alone with his thoughts for the time being, his mind swirling around the topic he wanted to talk about with her. It was terrifying, imagining all the made-up scenarios on how this one conversation he'll have with his girlfriend could go wrong. He should really try looking on the brighter side more often, but right now he can't.

Right now he feels his stomach twist and turn, and it almost makes him want to throw up. He clenches one of his hands into a fist until the knuckles turn white, forgetting his own strength of all things. He hates how uneasy he gets with simple confrontation, even though this wasn't a confrontation at all. It was really just a simple little talk. But the fear of it still gnaws at him from the inside out.

All those negative thoughts die once Lara enters the room.

"Hey, what's up?" She smiles, and it's as almost as bright as the sun that's shining through the window. Maybe if Pico stares hard enough, he could see the faintest outline of a halo right above her head.

He notes her appearance briefly. She's wearing shorts and a loose tank top. Her hair was slightly fluffed up, an effect of hair-drying such thick hair after taking a shower. She looked so relaxed and refreshed, and it makes his heart skip a beat. She looks so pretty.

Pico clears his throat as he finally loosens up, lifting one hand up to wave at her. "Hi, hey." He greets, and the words come out more quiet than he'd like. He feels like he's staring. He's definitely staring. It's so obvious to her that it makes her chuckle, the soft laughter finally snapping him out his trance.

"Here, take a seat." He moves to one side of the couch, making room for her to sit on.

Once she's seated, she looks at him expectantly. "So..." She starts, looking off to the side momentarily before returning her gaze on him.

Being on the spotlight like this makes a lump form in Pico's throat. There it was again, that sinking feeling of how this whole thing could go wrong. He clears his throat once more, pushing his fear back before speaking.

"So... about what I wanted to talk about." He pauses, trying to find the right words to describe the topic he has in mind. "It's... well, pretty serious."

"Did something go wrong?" She instantly asks. She tried to keep it casual, wanting to keep the light and airy atmosphere despite the topic (whatever it may be). But she couldn't stop the worry that slips in her tone when speaking, her protectiveness starting to override.

"No, no- everything's fine actually. I mean it as- this is really important, at least to me." He explains, and it makes her sigh in relief. He wouldn't want to give her a heart attack this early on.

"I'm listening."

"Well, you see... it's not really easy to talk about."

"Something personal?" She asks carefully, wanting to make sure she's not overstepping any boundaries. She knows he should know he can decline answering if it touches on something private.

"I guess you can consider it that way." He answers with a shrug, seeming unsure himself if it could be deemed as such.

"Well, whatever it is, take your time. I'm listening whenever you’re ready."

"Right, uhm..." He mutters, finding himself a lot more hesitant all of a sudden. He doesn't know why he still finds himself this way, scared to open up and be vulnerable still. The person across him has witnessed him at his complete worst. They've both been through hell and back for each other, yet there's still unease despite it all.

He gulps again, trying to swallow down his dread. "It's just..." He groans, and it frustrates him how complicated he's finding this. "It's- it's really not that easy. I-"

"Hey, it's okay." She immediately tries to reassure him, reaching out to hold him. Her hand rests gently on his arm, hoping it provides some form of comfort. "Like I said, take your time. But if you can't tell me then there's no need to force it-"

"But I want to tell you!" He cuts off, his face practically pleading. "I've been dying to tell you this and it's killing me, I-"

"Pico-"

"Lara," he grips her by the arms, white eyes staring straight into her own. "You are the love of my life and the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. You've stuck by my side after all this time even after everything. After every breakdown, argument, every time we'd wake up in the middle of the night because one of us had a nightmare. Even after I've hurt you-"

"So did I-" She's confused and startled. She wasn't expecting this yet she's still listening. She just couldn't help but butt in during that one sentence.

Pico huffs. "That's not the point. My point is that you still stayed. Stayed to love me, care for me. Made the best out of the fucking mess I am. Everything. And I just-"

"Pico-"

"You're everything. You're seriously fucking everything to me and I- I don't know where I'd be without you. Not here, not right now that's for sure. I'd probably- no, I'd definitely be dead sooner or later if you didn't come into my life."

"That's not true!"

"It is. It fucking is and you know it."

"Pico- please," she's the one pleading now, worried on where his words are going. Although she appreciates his adoration for her, she didn't want it to come at the cost of him demeaning himself. "I- you're shaking."

"You're just... I don't want to loose you." He admits weakly as he looks down, feeling his grip loosen when she moves his hands away. They're wrapped around hers now, slender and soft fingers cradling his shaky and calloused ones. He intakes a breath of air and it's an unsteady one. "I can't loose you."

"I'm not going anywhere, love. You know that." She responds, gripping his hands tightly into hers. "We've talked about this. I'll always be right here for you, just like you will for me."

"You're- that's not-"

"What? What's not? Explain it to me, I don't-"

"Fuck. Just-" He's exasperated now. He knows he's not making any sense and the conversation isn't going the way he wants it to. But he just can't bring himself to say the right words. The direct ones.

It's when he finally pulls a hand free from her hold, reaching into his pocket before dragging something out. He places the item on the palm of her hand, albeit a bit roughly.

"Just take it."

"Wh-" She's so much more confused now.

When she finally looks down and reluctantly opens her hand, she finds a small, golden colored band, with a shimmering stone encased neatly on it that she knows is worth thousands. It's settled gently on her palm, and that's when realization hits her.

He was proposing to her.

"Pico- This is-"

When she looks up to look at the ginger, she finds him facing away from her. He was trembling ever so slightly and... is that sniffling she hears?

Oh.

It makes her sigh, free hand reaching out to tap him gently on the shoulder. The action makes him flinch for a second, but she hopes it makes her lover look at her once more.

"Pico..." she says softly.

He slowly turns around to face her again, and that's when she sees it. The state of his face, eyes filled with tears that couldn't stop themselves from spilling, and the flush on his cheeks that was evident. This isn't the first time she saw him get this emotional, but the reasons for such a breakdown is different this time around. It makes her sigh again, reaching her free hand out to hold him.

"Oh, Pico... love..."

"'m sorry."

"Don't be."

She softly whispers, cradling his face now, letting her thumb wipe away some of his tears gently. It makes him instinctively lean into her touch, nuzzling into the palm of her hand despite the wetness. Soon enough, he moves closer, starting to embrace her now as he hides his face away into the crook of her neck. She lets him do so, the action second-nature as she moves her hand to his back now, starting to rub soothing circles on it.

"I could've worded this whole thing better." He mutters, his breath hitting her skin and making her hair tingle.

"You did fine."

"No I didn't. I'm such an idiot."

She sighs once more, a bit more frustrated this time. "You're not! You're the smartest person I even know honestly." She contends, not tolerating his degrading comments any longer.

"Seriously though, you did okay, I promise."

Pico merely stays quiet, gripping his hands a little tighter on her waist as he contemplates things. The silence takes over for a few minutes, but it doesn't bother her. Not one bit, at all. She'd wait for eternity on him if she needed to, but luckily she didn't have to when she hears his voice once more.

"You don't have to... y'know, say yes."

"Now why would I do that?" She tilts her head to try and look at him, even though the only thing she can really see is the back of his head.

He hums for a moment. "Multitude of reasons. Main one is that you aren't ready."

"Well, are you ready?" It felt redundant to ask such a question, considering he did just propose to her. But knowing him? She knows immediately that despite him taking initiative- he still had some reservations in doing this whole thing. She knows him like the back of her mind at this point, and it wouldn't exactly hurt to ask still.

Just as she expected, she feels the hands on her waist grip tighter for a moment, while the face that was hiding in the crook of her neck lets out a muffled answer. That was all she needed to know his true feelings. He was still hesitant.

"I'm taking that as a no, then?"

"No- I mean-" He finally looks up to her now, revealing his face from hiding. His eyes meets her once again and it makes him feel like he's caught red-handed. His voice was a bit more raspy and strained, but he cleared his throat before speaking again to let his words sound clearly.

"It was... hard. I thought about it a lot, so many times, for a long, long time." He admits now, his voice slow and almost quiet from the shame he feels. "Every time I thought of proposing, it scared me shitless. I didn't feel ready- I wasn't at all ready. But the more time flew past us, the more scared I got about losing you. Scared you'd get bored eventually with how long we're still dating. But it also felt too soon. But I still wanted to show you much you mean to me- how precious you are. But I'm still-"

"Hey. Hey, breathe. you're shaking again."

"Sorry, I-" He intakes a deep breath of air. When that wasn't enough, she guides him with a breathing exercise to help calm his nerves properly. When she sees he's finally relaxed, she speaks up.

"It's okay. It really is." She gives him a gentle smile, wanting to reassure him. "I can understand how hard this is for you, I'm not mad at you or blame you for feeling scared. But I want you to know I'd never get bored or leave you just because we've been dating for so long now. Do you really think I'd throw away all of this—what we have—just because you haven't proposed to me sooner?"

"No, but..." He trails off, realizing soon enough how she has a point.

It was purely paranoia on his part, clouding his common sense and reasoning. Even after all the progress they did to lessen it and make him feel safe in this relationship, the doubts still crawl back into his mind every now and then. Now is one of those moments. His face shows the inner conflict that he's going through, and it makes her frown. She places the ring in her hand on her side for a moment, before using that same hand to cradle his face fully to make him look at her again.

"I love you. I love you so much, Pico. I could care less when you'd propose to me, so please don't worry about it too much. Do it whenever you're ready."

"But I want to do it now. I want you to- I just want to show how you're everything to me. I don't want to push this back any further."

"So are you proposing now?"

His breath hitches, but he nods. "Yes."

"Then I do. I mean- sorry," she giggles, and it makes the ginger chuckle in response too. "I mean yes. Yes, I will marry you."

His features finally relax as it contorts to give out a relieved smile. His laughter becomes louder now, more joyful as he wraps his arms around her tightly. It pushes her back onto the couch with him on top of her now, still embracing her as he sounded and seemed so happy. It makes her laugh back in response, the laughter contagious.

"I'm glad. I’m so fucking glad..." He sighs, before pausing for a moment as he looks up to her. "Ah, where's the ring actually?"

"Oh, I set it down somewhere on the-"

"Found it." He says with a chuckle before lifting himself up from his fiancé now. Right, she was his fiancé now, and so was he to her. He could get used to calling her that.

He sits up properly to look at her now, and it makes her do the same. He holds out his hand to her, making her understand immediately and comply as she put her hand on top of his.

Slowly and gently, he slots the diamond ring into place, watching as it glimmers slightly. Once it was in place, Lara brings her hand up to admire it, shifting her hand in different angles as she observed the precious ring now wrapped around her finger. It makes her smile.

"It looks beautiful." She whispers.

"Glad you like it."

"Like it? I love it! But also... you shouldn't really have gotten me something so expensive."

He scoffs. "But you deserve it."

"I'm scared I might loose something so precious. The guilt of doing so would eat me alive."

"Nonsense. I'm sure it wouldn't slip off your finger that easily. How does it feel?" He eyes the ring closely now, running his thumb over the jewelry to check if he got the right size for her.

"Fits perfectly." She answers, and that alone makes his insides swell with pride.

"See? No need to worry. Even if you did loose it, I don't mind buying a new one."

"Pico!"

"Whaaat?" He shrugs innocently, but there's already a clear smirk on his face that he was anything but such. "Buying that one didn't even leave a dent in my savings. Surely another one wouldn't hurt." He says it so playfully that the angel couldn't help but just sigh.

"You're unbelievable."

"C'mon. Let me spoil you every now and then." He wraps her arms around her once more, gently guiding them both down to lay on the couch again. He nuzzles his face into her neck and it makes her laugh.

"It's not that- just..." She looks away as she hesitates on continuing, her cheeks heating up from the next few words she thought of saying. It only makes the ginger all the more curious, trying to encourage her to speak up. When she does, her voice is soft and quiet, and reasonably so.

"Save the rest of your money when we settle down, yeah?" She says sheepishly, but there's also a hint of sweetness to it. It doesn't help the gentle expression she has on that sets butterflies loose in his stomach.

"So soon?" He teases, although it did make his heart skip a beat just thinking about it. "Not like I can get more as extra."

"I'm just saying. Better to be safer than sorry."

"Fine, fine." He sighs playfully, surrendering to his lover's decision. He moves his head to be on top of hers now, pressing their foreheads together. There's that same adoration in his eyes as he whispers. "Love you."

She can't help but chuckle, smiling as she returns the same gaze. She feels her heart swell with the love she has for this man that it almost feels overwhelming. "Love you too." She replies, before feeling the soft press of his lips against hers.

She moves her hands upward to run through his hair, and it makes him smile during it. They'll be here for a while.

[jinkoh]

big thank you to @sungbeam for tagging me in her wrapped! i've actually been meaning to make a wrapped of sorts anyway so this was a very welcome motivator to actually do it~

i decided not to include the drabbles that i've written (and am still writing) for my anniversary event bc i felt like they'd mess with the statistics lol

anyway this was very fun to put together so i hope you'll enjoy my year in review~

first: younghoon - lipgloss(feb 22, 4.8k)

this fic wasn’t just my first fic of the year but also my first time writing for tbz and the fic that got me out of a rather bad writer’s block. it felt so fun to explore a new group even though i didn’t know them that well at the time and maybe couldn’t portray them well either. idk it rlly marked a new start and made me enjoy writing again~   

last: jay - still monster(nov 10, 0.5k)

another group I only started writing for this year. it’s just a teeny tiny drabble, but it was still fun to write~

longest: haknyeon - rat in the trap (jul 12, 10.6k)

it took me months to finish this tbh. my fics are usually very character driven but this one actually came with more plot and word building and that kinda made it harder on me to finish. it’s not perfect but i still love this sm and it somewhat opened the door to me finding joy in writing more twisted things.

there is also (don’t) wait up on me which is technically longer (13k), but because it mostly wasn’t actually written this year i feel like it doesn't really count?   

most popular: eric - sleeveless (oct 6, 2.5k)

y’all need to go to horny jail but who am i to judge i literally wrote this (and it isn’t even that kinky anyway).

personal pick: haknyeon - seeping through the cracks (jul 23, 2k)

it was my first time writing a y/n who is. just not a very good person and it was so much fun. unsurprisingly the fic didn’t do well at all but i genuinely don’t mind because this is a v self-indulgent fic written just for me. it’s awful and experimental but i love it and in a twisted way it just feels comforting to read.

another thing i greatly enjoy(ed) working on is my soulmate series~

ateez — 1 fic

did i add the artist category just so i could talk about this? maybe so. but aside from tbz and enha i also wrote my first ateez fic this year. it’s only that one story currently (there are more in the works) but the experiences i had with posting it made me think that atinyblr is a very kind place so i wanted to take this chance to say thank you<3

pentagon — 1 fic

i swear i still love them endlessly--but writing for them has been feeling difficult this year, both for obvious ptg related reasons but also for private ones so i couldn't really bring myself to work on the ideas and wips i had for them. i'm glad i at least got to finish that one wooseok fic that i had in my drafts for a year or so.

enhypen — 3 fics

i kinda got into them over the last few months and though i’ve only written a few short drabbles for them, i’ve found it very fun so far~

the boyz — 40 fics

that is. kind of an insane amount. i know a lot of them are short blurbs bc i don’t really differentiate between full length fics and drabbles but. that is still a lot for me. especially because my writing process tends to be rather slow. but i suppose with how much i've come to love tbz it's not that surprising~

most fics: sunwoo — 8 fics

as kate said in her wrapped: “i may not bias him- but oh boy- i love writing fics for him.” there is just something about sunwoo that makes it very fun and easy~   

most words:

#3 hyunjae — 15.2k (7 fics)

#2 haknyeon — 15.5k (4 fics)

#1 younghoon — 15.9k (6 fics)

i do bias all three of these guys (some more than others) so it seems fair enough?

total fics: 43

(incl. 1 text fic)

total word count: ~80k

1.9k words per fic on average (i just love me my little drabbles~)

frankly this year was a huge mess and i'm glad it's over--but at least in terms of writing it's been very fun! i feel like i've challenged topics and formats i haven't really touched before and generally let myself experiment a little more. it also feels like the first time that a lot of my works were really written for me, because i enjoyed the idea and found it intriguing or comforting to work on, rather than writing with other people in mind, and that just feels nice and freeing~

i've also made some new connections this year that i am really grateful for! it's mainly to blame on deep diving into tbz and honestly? zero regrets. i've found deobiblr to be one of the sweetest and warmest communities i've ever engaged with and i'm so thankful to everyone who welcomed me with open arms and treated me and my writing with kindness<3

also let me just say special thanks to my dearest friend @blizzardfluffykpop. without kate a lot of my fics would have probably never seen the light~ there's so many stories that have their origin in our dms and bouncing ideas off you makes writing so much more enjoyable! and of course i probably wouldn't be a deobi without you, so thanks for pulling me under with you♥️

anyway--with that 2024 comes to an end! thank you to everyone who's been along for the ride this year, and let's make 2025 a good one~

[danieyells]

I asked bc some people are touchy with baby trap! Hshs either way I was thinking. VERY likely it's ooc but it's a thot

The mc manages to be freed by the curse but for some reason the matches don't work so darkwick is already like 'sure, finish studying here but you have to go on missions' I'm imagining that something like the Jiro dubcon fic happens but with some changes

like rather than just touching over their clothes he gets bold enough to slide inside them, and that the anesthesia is strong enough for the reader to barely remember it as a wet dream if at all. He ends up cumming inside thinking it would be alright bc he can give you some anomalous b plan pill, but during the while it takes the reader to wake up he warms up to the idea lightly, he wouldn't mind having to take care of your prenatal care. Maybe you could teach him how families work and feel

A few weeks later the reader is in a check up because of general sickness and soreness and Yuri notices something weird in their blood work like hCG so he questions them like "are you sexually active and you didn't think it was important to disclose?" "Mh? Nope since I came to the academy I didn't do anything" but Yuri doubts them bc that only means pregnancy!! So he tells them away and bitches to it with Jiro

"i'm the closest thing they have to a doctor, can you believe they lie about things like that?"

"I can take them next time"

"why do you care? " He starts leaving when Yuri figures something "jiro... Were you two alone two months ago???"

Either way next check up the mc is given a bs explanation about a wild mosquito anomaly that causes pregnancy when biting two people back to back and Jiro being bitten too. Nobody could believe it other than the mc hshshha

re: dubcon jiro fic

That's fair! Like I said, I have no squicks or triggers worth noting, so i just 'p' at just about any thought hahaha

DAMN ANON I DIG THAT the reason Jiro didn't go further in the fic was ultimately because that was part of anon's idea haha and i wanted it to have more of a dubcon and dubious feeling where it was kind of ambiguous if he actually did anything or not, but I feel like I definitely failed to give it the proper feeling of blurred reality lol. . .I think i was in too much of a rush to get the ideas in my head out and in the end I didn't entirely make what i wanted lolol

I think the matches not working could plausibly be explained away by the ring. Just a side effect of its defenses--it tried to protect them earlier after all! It wouldn't want the champion's memories altered further!

But yeah I. I like that a lot lol. . .it's a lot softer and less cruel than I usually like my babytrapping, but it kind of fits Jiro I think(or the Jiro in this fic anyway--)

(sort of kind of in and out writing and musing under the cut. It's like 1am as i write this, don't expect much--also doesn't entirely meet the idea but. /shrug) no written smut in this one.)

The curse is something mundane and silly that they already have the cure for. But they need to be put to sleep for it to work--maybe it's a simple curse where their body won't be able to sleep without outside interference, at which point the curse ends after a good night's rest once something puts them to sleep. Something utterly simple. But they're completely unconscious, at most a faint awareness of being touched that may not even be real. So unconscious that they couldn't wake up from the feeling of their cunt being broken into if they thought it was real. If they were even aware of more than pleasurable pressure at most. It's just a dream like many others. If they had a dream at all. By the time they wake up again it's just fuzzy, blurry, bubble-like thoughts, floating up and popping out before they can really be analyzed. They feel an ache in their abdomen, but they're aching all over and haven't eaten in a day due to the treatment. They can stand, they can walk, they can return to the Cathédrale Terminale. And they can sleep properly and don't feel anything but the ache of a particularly difficult mission, meaning the minor curse they experienced was gone. The days go by as usual, training with anomalous tools to be more useful on missions and studying various fields to help each house.

Jiro almost forgot about it when they come in one day feeling nauseous. It'd been weeks. Yuri had scolded him after reading the detailed medical log. But he, too, was too curious about the results to suggest they cancel his little "experiment" before he was caught.

They both agreed that sometimes ethics weren't worth considering when it came to experiments--or one's own strongest desires.

The anomalous emergency contraceptive he had considered administering after his rather untoward act of unprofessionalism had been placed back in its cabinet.

Injected along with medication to discourage side effects of the curse's healing, was an experiment of Yuri's that had been tested on several anomalies, increasing fertility and successfully allowing for some otherwise unnatural breeding patterns.

He'd drugged them and raped them and cleaned them. And after that, he'd all but guaranteed their pregnancy.

He couldn't imagine being like Yuri and being granted the privilege of acting like a spoiled child.

Perhaps the best way for him to experience 'family' would be to have his own.

That was the real reason the inspector had arrived, nauseous, to Mortkranken. But they weren't going to tell them that. Yuri scolded them for unsafe sexual practices, which they insisted with tears in their eyes they hadn't done despite the presence of hCG in their blood and urine. They had no idea how they could have become pregnant--surely there was an explanation? Yuri clicked his tongue in irritation, as though he suspected they were truly lying. Perhaps still somewhat annoyed by Jiro's misdeed, he said that they couldn't have simply been assaulted in the night by some scoundrel.

Jiro resisted the urge to snort.

In the end an explanation had been concluded--one rooted in some myth but hard to prove or disprove.

There supposedly existed a type of demon called a concubus. These demons feed on sexual energies and fluids. While they might typically seduce humans into feeding them, others were more 'shy' and would do so in the night while one slept. However many were infertile and these were able to impregnate humans using borrowed human sperm, as doing so provided them greater sexual pleasure and thus a more satisfying meal.

A female concubus(typically called a succubus) would have sex with a male human, take the semen, and have sex with a male concubus(typically called an incubus) who would absorb the semen from within the succubus, before impregnating another human with it. While the resulting child would still be human, as they were made only using the genetic material of human parents, the humans need not engage in intercourse to reproduce as a result.

Aside from the circumstances through which the conception occurred, it was an otherwise normal pregnancy with little to be studied.

Although such a horrifying conclusion shook them, they vaguely remembered wincing as Ritsu recited Japan's laws relating to abortion to a sobbing student some time before--surely this counted as rape and the pregnancy could be terminated? But with the way the ghouls were treated and restricted, something told them they wouldn't be allowed to leave campus for such a thing without reporting whoever had harmed them as proof.

And they'd been in Mortkraken long enough to know that no medical procedure would be normal here.

"You have some time to think about it." Is what everyone told them. Ritsu in particular gave them the exact amount of weeks.

Two things convinced them to carry the child to term.

The first was the realization that perhaps these demons would return to the scene of their crime--if they could be captured, the knowledge gained could help a great deal of people, especially the ghouls. Especially Luca, searching for his brother, and ghouls like Kaito, Haku, and Rui, who wanted to return to being human.

The second was the way Jiro placed a strong and heavy hand on their tummy, stoic expression somewhat curious. The way he looked at them and offered to help them. He didn't know much about babies or families or family planning, and he was a little scared to do more harm than good with his freakish strength and tendency to break fragile things--but it would be helpful to have a doctor nearby, right? And to not go at this alone?

"Even if it's not anomalous, a baby is sort of like an infectious disease." Was his comment that made them laugh for the first time the whole day.

(Yuri protested that Jiro handle this, as Yuri insisted he was the only real doctor present. Jiro managed to reassure him that surely an ordinary pregnancy would be uninteresting and unremarkable, and that the inspector wouldn't be willing to have their fetus subject to Yuri's experiments. If anything of interest or concern were to happen, Yuri would be the first to know besides Jiro. But surely he had more interesting subjects to examine?)

A matter of weeks later and the real shock came(for the scholarship student, although Jiro had forgotten, himself) when they ran a paternity test--Jiro had been 'struck by the demons' as well, and his sperm had been used to father the child.

". . .Huh." He was far worse of an actor than Yuri. Fortunately he wasn't one for big reactions to begin with. ". . .I guess that explains how I woke up a while back."

"Do you. . .still wanna help with it?" They asked in an uncertain whisper. "I understand if not. If you'd rather I not keep it. . . ."

"I kind of want it more." Jiro shrugged, continuing to mill about their checkup. "Is that weird? It's mine, so I don't think that's weird. Especially since it's with you."

They gripped their patient gown in their fists, feeling their face heat up from embarrassment. It was a bit of a stretch, and perhaps it was the sensitivity from the pregnancy talking, but that felt as close to a confession as they'd ever gotten from Jiro.

Perhaps these demons weren't all bad. Perhaps they were simply trying to help what they saw as a pair of lovers who needed a little push.

Maybe being a parent with Jiro wouldn't be so hard.

[mamawasatesttube]

As someone who reads a lot of fics with the "no metas in Gotham" (FREE MY SOUUUUUUUUULLLL) I can definitely say that its existence is silly at best, and terribly fucking hilarious at worst. It's even funnier when you actually compare that to stuff batfamily members say in canon not just because it's not something they would follow but also because it's just,,,, not something that would really make sense considering that most of them are either poc or gay (Bruce, honey, you're Jewish, what goes on in your tiny little head) and they 100% would feel personally offended at it, not in a "we're so sad about this" but more so "Bruce I will personally spank you, you dumbass"

Like Bruce honey, your daughter is a young Asian girl, ya really think it's a good idea to be functionally racist next to her??? Like are you sure about that????? What kind of makes this worse is that there is actually no need for this to exist for you to write a good story, it has no storytelling function, so it just comes off as silly and out of touch most of the time,,, because the people who write stories with that rule ARE out of touch. Anyway, I'm gonna go back to reading flash comics and being sick, I miss Bart, I miss my little boyyyy

< 🦎 >

sorry to hear that youre sick!! gives you some tea. also *puts on my impulse (1995) propaganda hat* if you havent already, you should read impulse (1995) it is literally the comic of all time

but yeah. i don't have much to add re: the """"no metas in gotham"""" fanon that i haven't already said, but yea it's just... no thanks. it's funny bc the times bruce has been written as being shitty about metas in canon, he was explicitly depicted as being in the wrong and getting told off by other characters for it, and yet...

but yeah i run the risk of just repeating myself if i say much further. tldr It's Not Good Writing Lol

[raz-writes-the-thing]

Well, you don't just feel like I enjoy your writing for your style and not only the character, that is very much what is actually going on. I never asked to be put on any tag list bc I have notifs turned on for everything you post anyway and therefore am informed that new writing from you has dropped without need for a tag. You are actually the only tumblr writer I do this with. Because sure yea I will occasionally go into the tags of specific xcharacters when the mood strikes me, which is how I found your blog in the first place, but I rarely click through into the authors' blog, let alone read their fics for characters I'm unfamiliar with. Your style of writing, your imagination for scenes, your ability to capture emotion, your consistent ability to steer clear of tropes that make me cringe and the more generalised personal touch you bring to your writing have all enchanted me and are the reason why I keep reading all your work, even if I've never heard of the character before and in some cases have never even heard of the fandom altogether before, + even if the reader character is the sub and therefore I have 0 interest in identifying with them lol. Maybe I wasn't clear enough about this before but yea your style is very much the thing for me here. (well okay possibly I also one more motivating factor to keep notifs turned on from you which is I kinda hope you might one day do something with the prompt or the character match-up request I sent you, but dw I'm in no rush and uninclined to leave either way) - 🌒

uh, excuse me- how did this get lost? when was this submitted? im? hello? i am so sorry that i haven't gotten to this before- i genuinely did not know this ask existed.

the fact that there are at least one of you out there (theres at least one more, ive seen it in their tags when they reblog) who read everything i post bc they have notifs on is insane (in a good way). enjoying my writing enough to read everything is so,,, its such a warm fuzzy feeling in my chest. its how you know people really actually enjoy your writing for the simple credit of your writing and not just because you write for a character they like-

im also very glad to hear that im able to steer clear of cringe for you. im not sure how thats possible but i sure am glad i can hahaha. i think i just avoid what makes me cringe for the most part.

im also sorry i havent gotten to your requests yet. theyre buried in my inbox somewhere. atm ive been very burnt out and stressed with work so ive not had any motivation really to touch my blog. i will attempt to find them and start on at least one thing for you this weekend. im working on it though! i have a couple wips too, so, eyes peeled!

but yes, thank you so so so so so much for this ask <3 you've really made my day and i am so grateful to have you as one of my beloved readers <3 <3 <3

[altruistic-meme]

oh you KNOW i gotta ask 10

and also 11 cause maybe talking about it would help

you are one cruel, cruel fiend, milo. why would you do this to me.

10. 🤡How many Wips are you actively working on?

alexa play "oh my dear lord" by the unlikely candidates

okay. okay. so in the interest of trying to limit what we consider ACTIVELY working on, i'm going to exclude fics that i'm not really sure if i'll ever finish and fics that i haven't actually STARTED writing, but i'm still going to include fics i know i'm going to return to even if i haven't touched them in a while. so let's check the WIP list...

3 for All for the Game (why is there) joy in this poison, Figurative Ghosts, go low

2 for Young Royals Dare(d) To Do It, Not Supposed to Know*

1 for Captive Prince laurent stabs damen

9 for Bungo Stray Dogs blackhole time fuckery, will you be mine? (no sir), The Port Mafia Boss's Most Loyal Dog, me-ow, dazai's job, abo au, outsider POV of corruption, who tf is slug????, not really a college au,

so that is... 15 TOTAL, most of which are currently bsd fics bc i have been bouncing between all of the WIPs there with incredible frequency cus my brain refuses to just STAY PUT ON ONE.

*techinically i haven't actually written anything for NSTK, but because it is one half of the Parallels AU and i have written for Dare(d), which is its partner fic, i'm still counting that as having worked on it. especially since they're 2 POVs of the same story, which means some of the events in Dare(d) will be shown in NSTK as well, so the same dialogue will be used in both for scenes they share.

11. 🛠Is there a scene or anything in the WIP you are struggling with right now?

oh this is about to be so long im so sorry

i think there's something im struggling with with all of my bsd WIPs right now, which is probably part of why there are just so many that i'm actively working on bc if i get stuck on one i can just move to something else for a while ;;;;

largely, i feel like im struggling a lot with figuring out Dazai and Chuuya's characters which obviously affects all of the WIPs since they're all skk-centric!! but they're both such complex characters with a super complex relationship with each other and i really love that about them and i want to be able to get that across, even in the shorter fics!! (this was also a struggle with the torturing kunikida fic, though since it was from Kunikida's POV it was a little easier bc i could show the contrast to what he expected of skk vs. what he saw that day to help get that across)

but just. characterization is ALWAYS an issue for me, especially when i first start writing characters. and i know that it'll be fine bc it always is, i think my anxiety about it causes me to put in the effort to really make the characters work and people usually really seem to enjoy them?? it is one of the things about my writing that people mention most often (and i will never tire of that, see: lots of anxiety about it) so i know i should calm down about it but HHHHHH

on the brightside(?) i do have a WIP that's still very much in the planning stages that will allow me to look at and play with a lot of the more toxic/codependent/generally unhealthy aspects of the two of them + their relationship while also giving me some more wiggle room in their characterization, which i think will be a fun way to help curb some of that anxiety when i actually start writing it.

and outside of that, looking at a specific WIP for an issue im facing currently: Loyal Dog is giving me SO MUCH TROUBLE bc i know what needs to happen and i know overall how the story is going to go and what the main points in it are. but actually figuring out how to write what i need to get down is. a struggle.

like it's just. i know the main plot and the main points and some of what needs to be done to get there. but the finer details are tripping me up. this time i think the outsider POV is working against me here, but also having it from an outsider POV is necessary to the story as i want it told!! idk. it's a LOT stupid little details that i need to plan and decide on while trying to make it plausible that's stressing me out more and hhhhhhhhhh

[ writer WIP asks to help me procrastinate writing ]

[cornflowershade]

thanks for tagging me @distant-screaming <333

Current time: 12:18pm

Current activity: Making some tea 🫖

Currently thinking about: ...how I don't want to go to work today lol. I love what I do but today I feel yicky (hence the tea) so I'm not looking forward to leaving my house. Especially since I have to be there for an extra hour bc of a staff meeting.

Current favourite song: c'mon I don't do favorites 😭 I've been liking Ordinary by Tilly Birds a lot though! :D

Currently reading: Wish I had something interesting to put here but uh. I'm not currently reading anything.

Currently watching: The Shipper! This show is WACK. And I love it. It's just. So wild, and funny. Also, First's acting is literally SO good. The way he sells the body swap I just. AGH. Also cute lil Ohm is there. And Jennie. It's a good time and I appreciate how unpredictable it is. It's been my little happy evening watch lately.

Current favourite character: I think this was my answer last time I got tagged in one of these but. Ray from Only Friends. He's just so!! <3

Current WIP: I have a few fanvids in progress. Not gonna say they're still going at a promising pace but, I want them to be done so bad! I have a really fancy fun edit going to New Rules for SandRay & NickBoston. I also have a Buffy Summers edit going.

Aside from that I have a few fics but—while I certainly haven't given up on them—I'm not sure I'd call them WIPs considering the amount of time it's been since I last touched them.

Other things I've been working on include writing down Thai words I know on flashcards, which has been a fun if time-consuming process! It's a personal goal of mine to work on learning Thai. I've actually never learned a second language but have always wanted to, so it's rather special to me! I don't know a ton yet but I'm proud that I haven't given up on it. And it's honestly so satisfying when I'm watching something or listening to music and realize I understood something small without having to read subs, or understand a teeny tiny joke that wouldn't come across in English.

Besides that, I was doing a giant WIP in October which I didn't get that far on, but that's making the floofy Wednesday Addams dress. I've at least finished drafting a really nice fitted undershirt and making most of the detailed leather belt with a thick pleather material I had—it just needs to be assembled but I didn't do that bit yet bc my sewing machine was having issues for a while there (anyway I cut out 110 little shapes for the belt by hand with an xacto knife bless my SOUL). Hopefully I'll get back to the project when I'm feeling more energetic again!

Alright, tagging some lovely mutuals :D @lamonnaie @softpran @celestial-sapphicss @justafriend-ql @firstkanaphans @khaofirsts

[pokespefangirl]

(For the Pokéstar Studios AU)

Hey this is the same anon, I'm super happy that you liked the idea! Sincerely, I am extremely stoked, thank you so much!

This concept has been running through my mind nonstop ever since that ask and I have a few more ideas. Not to pressure you to add this in the fic or force these ideas on you, yet again I'm just having fun sharing these.

Anyways, Blake and Black brother-in-law moments REAL?! Whitley and White sister-in-law moments TRUE!? Ugh i'm eating up these hypothetical scenarios.

White most likely assigns Black to be Blake's bodyguard whenever he decides to go out, since he has celebrity status and all. The same thing goes for Whitley, though I see Blake accompanying her a lot too. So Black has to thirdwheel, not knowing it's Blake enacting vengeance for all those time he was the thirdwheel when it was just White, Black, and him at the BW Agency.

Also more of how I think Blake would be as an actor, though in this scenario he never received super spy training, he probably got super intense media training from White. They're both coming up with insane, genius, absolutely unhinged strategies to manipulate the media, Light Yagami monologuing typa bamboozlery. And Whitley and Black are just having a pleasant chat, side eyeing them every thirty seconds or so.

I imagine Blake's acting style to be refined, perfect, infallible that it's almost too much. Since he doesn't understand emotions, he studies, studies, studies, and studies. Writing down what his character would do, analyzing every line of dialogue, down to the body language and speech patterns etcetera. That's how he's able to nail so many different characters. AKA Christian Bale ahh acting style.

Now for Whitley, she's the opposite, she's new and unrefined, full of flaws. But full of emotion, her performances reaches out and captures. Delivering the feel needed for the scene and character.

And it really fascinates Blake, how she's so in tune with her emotions, making him kinda obsessed with her reactions...

That's it for now, I haven't even touched the surface for Blake and White's sibling dynamic but I sort of don't want this to be novel-length. Yet again, I am so happy that you accepted that ask! I really look forward to what you're cooking up, take as much time as you need!

Lil Bonus:

Blake: *trying to spook/fluster Whitley* Great job on set, your acting needs a little more work but you've got potential.

Whitley: Oh! Um, thanks...

Blake: You should learn how to be more confident, we don't want people to think you're easy to take advantage of...those rumors in Pokéwood are not to be taken lightly. *attempts to rizz* don't worry I'll-

Whitley: OH NO, w-were you a victim!?

Blake: Wh-what of course not-

White: *Bonks him on the head* Of course not! I made SURE that never happened to him, and I will DEFINITELY do the same for you!

ANON YOU ARE DRIVING ME ABSOLUTELY CRAZY W HAPPINESS W ALL OF THESE GREAT FANTASTIC Amazing Awonderf IDEAS, OFC I NEED TO ADD ALL OF THEM NOW <3 NEED TO GO TO SCHOOL SOON SO I'LL ADD MORE LATER BUT FOR NOW I WAS THINKING

Blake is studying Whitley right?!!! Almost out of a curiosity as to how she feels and experiences all these emotions?? So naturally!! Especially her beautiful eyes that get teary whenever shes thinking about something sad! He could study her all day!!

To add to that: Blake never had pets or cared for animals bcs you know... sociopath and all, but he starts seeing Whitley feeding a stray cat!! ANd EVENTUALLY (WHEN THERES SOME ANGST POINT) HE STARTS FEEDING THE LITTLE KITTEN HIMSELF just from seeing Whitley when he's walking by all alone!!

And you're so right he'd craft his image with the convoluted intelligence of Light Fucking Yagami lmaoo that's so good!!

AND UK WHITE IS THE MOST AMBITIOUS GIRL LIKE SHE'S MAKING SURE BLAKE IS TOPPING ALL THE RATINGS AWARDS WHATEVE, BUT her YOUNGER BRO ALSO ANNOYS HER SOMETIMES W HIS HEINOUS SOCIOPATHY AND SHE HAS TO DO DAMAGE CONTROL LMAOO (mostly it's him being with all sorts of ladies before being w Whitley and unintentionally breaking their hearts cus they didn't interest him for too long)

AND BLACK IS SUCH A FIERCE BODYGUARD BUT ALSO WHOLESOME!! LIKE HE WILL KILL FOR HIS BROTHER IN LAW!! BUT OFC OFC HE'LL GIVE THE FANS FREE FOOD AND GIFT BASKETS ON HIS BEHALF TOO AND HELP THE FANS GET BLAKE'S AUTOGRAPH especially he'll help anybody whose disabled bcs it's the right thing to do!! God he's so good

so yeah Whitley!! Whitley is pure!! Unfiltered!! And blake doesn't know what that's like aside from his family everybody else in Hollywood tend to be shallow and judgemental and fake!! But Whitley s not afraid to cry, to smile, to laugh, she's not afraid of what ppl think and guess what!! Blake needs that bcs he's been hiding his sociopathy all along! Bcs his career would be over if anybody revealed his diagnoses!!

Initially it started out as fun that he studied Whitley and tried to get emotions out of her!! Initially he just joked she was becoming an addiction! Just something to have!! But then things started to get real and he began to experience!!

Something big!! Something else!! Nobody had ever kept him that interested in his life!! Jumping from person to person!! Director to Director!! Everybody was fed up with him but then came in Whitley!! And this man just cannot let her go!!

And ya know Black is ready to defend his whole family!! He's outside of his work hours still doing his job cus that's what he should do!! Is Prez okay?? Where should we go next?? Lemme be with you Prez i cant risk anything happening to u not on my watch imma be the best bodyguard ever!! And Blake's just standing there like- "Bet"

ANYWAYS I SAID I DIDN'T HAVE MUCH TIME BUT I GUESS I HAD TO RESPOND HAHAHA, thank you so much this whole au and concept is honestly making my day and i can't wait to finish it!!

[gornackeaterofworlds]

I,M & Z ;0

HEHEHE HI MIGHTY

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)? Reading: Yan and noncon I guess? And duping/secrets, which @/desceros does really well. Sex pollen. Writing: oh man. I like hurting my readers. A huge guilty pleasure is that I make massive written works. I can't keep it small or contained, I can't make blurbs or rambles. It needs a pre-established and somewhat explored relationship at the least, and I just tend to go for longer works. I like huge arcs. I also tend to make very....powerful, conniving love interests, visible in both Caiji in Butterfly Effect and Anni in my bay raph fic. Come to think of it, I also tend to pair them with bay raph-

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you’d care to share? Like writing premises? One about making bay donnie origami and taunting him with it in hidden places. Another about bay Mikey in a shame spiral and needing your validation. Another about bay raph learning to be gentle when he touches you. An idea by @luckycharms1701 where bay Leo aches to have Mikey's girlfriend. A short comic here and there about my human fnaf rise au. I hope to one day make turtle pov fics about how much they crave you. Something with bay Mikey x a bubbly reader that likes to eat(not a feeder fic, a chubby reader). I also hope to make loser!reader content😶‍🌫️ and more headcanon style nsfw. I want to make Yan works as well. Though all my premises are on the back burner at the moment, as I can't write for the foreseeable future.

Z: Major character death–do you ever write/read it? Is there a character whose death you can’t tolerate? You won't necessarily see it a lot recently bc I haven't been writing, but I write it a lot. I've killed Big Mama in my human rise comic. There's an average amount of character death in Butterfly Effect, though less than you'll probably think. I however have a very hard time reading it. I mostly read smut or romance, but in the angstier things I read it's still just canonical deaths, like rise bad future works. It's less that I hate it and more that I don't seek it out. I don't think there's a character death I don't tolerate, bc again I don't really read those kinds of works. I do, however, really struggle with reading works where the reader is dead? Too much disconnect, I feel. I LOVE alternate pov fics but I also like actually feeling and being alive, and most of them get very hopelessly sad, which is one of the few things that actually affects me

[jittyjames]

8 9 10 16 23

YEEHAW THANKS ANONNNN

8. for hamilton, i hope more people can appreciate aaron burr. he is the most underutilized character in the musical, and often times people just completely erase his character and characterization. i could go on for hours about aaron burr. his dynamics with everyone are amazing, and let's be real, leslie is arguably one of the most talented people in the cast. HOW DO PEOPLE NOT APPRECIATE BURR??? anyway for jcs, just jcs broadway 2012 in general. people don't even put this production in the core ones, and it makes me saddd :(( like guys i promise it's good. i know it's different BUT DIFFERENT IS GOOD!! they didn't appreciate it then, and they don't appreciate it now :((( but also for jcs, mary. i need to see more mary love. more mary fics, more mary fanart. just more mary pls and thanks.

9. OOOO for hamilton, I'm gonna go with jeffmads. i don't really venture into ships that don't involve alexander, but the dynamics in this one are good. i see really cute fanart and really cool fics that bring me joy even if i don't obsess over them, spend hours thinking about them, have the desire to write for them. it's a good ship. y'all should do it more. as for jcs....uhhhh.. most of the ships i like I go absolutely crazy for. I don't just enjoy them normally. I guess caiaphas and annas. like yes. good content. I love to see it.

10. OOOOO CAN I PUT ALL OF YOU????? PRETTY PLEASE?????? ALL OF YOU MAKE THE FANDOM EXPERIENCE SO MUCH BETTER???

ok I'm just going to rattle off some moots for hamilton: @firebalda @crys-sp @cecescomposition @starduckys @conjectureand-gloom @gabcakes @arkhamknight14 and the entirety of the founding fucks. I'm probably missing some, I'm sorry :(((

and for jcs, just the entirety of the jcs discord server. like all of y'all. you guys have made jcs such a good fandom, and you're all so talented. i love that we can just brain rot together

16. for hamilton, i feel like more details have already been obsessed over. I love the use of motifs for songs (like wait for it and burn being the same notes, just at different tempos and with different rhythms) like the implications there that burr and Eliza have some similarities in these songs makes my head spin and keeps me up at night. of course, this is just me being insane for hamburr. like lin is a smart man. he worked on this for years. he did that on PURPOSE. also the fact that alexander is constantly singing other people's themes, like eliza's and burr's, almost mocking them with it. in jcs 2012 broadway, during jesus' arrest, judas is trying to run to jesus with and outstretched hand only to get flung away by a guard. no one talks about this. i brainrot over this moment. judas canonically was trying to rescue jesus. and when he's just centimeters away from touching him, they're ripped apart. also not really tiny, but under-appreciated. the temple scene. the implications of judas walking through while jesus/mary avoid it, the way he's staring at the dancers (men and women), and the fact jesus gets so angry he shoves him that hard. like oh god, they took an already dense scene and made it even more heavy. WHAT WAS GOING ON THERE???

23. hmmm. this ones hard bc most the time, i actively venture into the fandom if it looks interesting. so this happened with hazbin hotel. some mutuals were fangirling over it, and i gave it a try and loved it!!! but i guess if I had to pick one I haven't looked into yet....I think it might be batman?? but not batman??? batman's kids??? idk I see it a lot, and they're always doing lots of whump stuff!

THANKS ANONNNNNN MWAH

[skzdarlings]

Hey darling :D

I haven't sent my usual play-by-play rants this time XD That chapter was to be digested in silence fr🧘‍♀️

A 10k word count is no joke so firstly, thank you for deciding to share this story with the fam <3 I can't wrap my head around the fact that there was supposed to be more, but you opted to make it a different chapter

So, dearest darling, I just wanted to say:

Each fic you do, the thing I find most exciting is the creative ways you dodge using 'y/n'. Let me tell you, I live for it. Like with the bodyguard au you decide to describe how he talks to mc instead of just simply slapping 'y/n' onto the sentence and calling it a day... and that just does it for me.

For this specific chapter I love how you used Jisung's and Hyunie's characters. Han starting the chapter literally made me go :( Partially bc he doesn't know his besties sleep in the same bed and have been doing so for the past 4 years. I wonder if they ever tell him...

With Hyunjin, ugh the character developed queen you are. Especially the part where mc is making sure he eats that cupcake ("You eat! You eat!"~Han Jisung) Tbh this chapter is so angsty bc yet again I go 😔 Sure, mc's life is basically hell but she has Felix... Who does Hyunjin have? :(((( I'm worried about him, does he have anyone he can rely on? :(

I audibly yelled when Felix caught mc with her hand in her pants 💀💀💀💀💀💀 I CACKLED! It was so funny to me like why couldn't a homegirl think of doing it under the covers😭😭??? Or in another bathroom of that humongous house

This brings me to the humanness of the chapter. A moment of silence for your ever-impeccable use of imagery🙇‍♀️ They're just kids. They really are just a boy and a girl at the end of the day. When Felix leaned over to peck her forehead I genuinely stopped reading for a second. The way he handles her so gently (most of the time hehe), coupled with the way she was counting the seconds.... Like darling be fr😭 How will I ever move on from this fic? I loved every description of how she clung to him because she didn't really know how else to deal with what she's feeling. And for heaven's sake Felix, KISS HER ALREADY! I love how I'm saying this knowing he can't. Ooh which reminds me, i loved the part where you said that crossing that line would have to be intentional. No not-so-accidental hanky panky here hah. For all the cliches that are allowed to slide in fanfiction, I once again love how you simply refuse to be ordinary.

Lastly, onto the smut hehe ;) The tension was everything to me. The build up was superb. All the times he rushed to the bathroom 😭😭✋ My favourite part was when he asked mc if Hyunjin had kissed her. I know that part wasn't steamy but if I was mc that would have told me all I need to know ✋ Anyways, you ate up every fic and it's author's pet with that mutual mast******** I would've physically died. The way you described everything fbdhgfjfjtjidbm

Separate sub-point for this bc the way SHE PUT HER HAND IN HIS MOUTH

🕳️🤸‍♀️💨

Hands were everything in this fic. And the way neither of them could finish without having physical contact with each other.

PLEASE SEND AN AMBULANCE

P.s: the way all it took was a 'shh' from him. That was personal. I felt targeted.

Ok, the end😂 These asks always end up being so long no matter how hard I try😔❤️

😭😭😭😭😭😭 this message is amazing, i so appreciate the time you take to write such amazing commentary!! it absolutely makes my day, you have nooo idea! 💗💗💗💗 i feel like i am so bad at replying to comments and just keep saying thank you hahaha but truly thank you thank you. those things you touched on were highlights for me when writing and i love to see what most jumps out at people too as readers. also hehe yes 🤭 the hand in the mouth was A Moment

thank you so so much again. comments like this really get me excited to write more 😊💗💗

[perexcri]

twice the fool PLEASE and also idk which one is vampire byler but THAT ONE please 🤲🧎‍♀️i would like to know what ur most excited about in those ones & also if you would mayhaps like to share a line/snippet~

HI LARK thank you so much for stopping by :D 💜

twice the fool (stonathan): this is my stonathan btvs au for the upcoming stonathan week!!

i'm very excited for it because i'm taking one of my favorite btvs episode plots and applying it to stonathan! if anybody can guess which buffy episode it's from i'll give you a gold star and dedicate my next cat to you~

i'm also excited to work with the older teens from st for once, and i think it's been really nice to creatively switch things up for me this way. i've loved getting to apply some of the buffy character archetypes to st characters: Robin is basically Buffy, i've made Nancy a mixture of Willow and Faith, Hopper is Giles (💀), and Steve is kind of the Xander figure

here's a snippet because i am very excited for Chrissy's role in this fic :)

Chrissy Cunningham – The Spelling Bee! – Serving all your Hawkins High magic needs – knock three times on the table in the woods behind the football field – walk-ins only! The teachers had been mercilessly scraping her fliers off the hallways’ corkboards, and Steve had grown so used to them that he hadn’t bothered to really consider them anymore. Since the hellmouth had been opened last year thanks to Will’s disappearance, all kinds of weird shit had been attracted to Hawkins, and Hawkins’ citizens had, in turn, become more attracted to some of their town’s oddities as well. Namely, a lot of the Hawkins High students had become interested in magic, Chrissy being the most interested of them all. She’d transformed from a total popular cheerleader type to the girl who sat in class and played with crystals or read people’s palms. She was still popular as hell and had the top cheerleader spot of course, but everyone had agreed she’d grown a little…odd. But Hawkins has always been weird, just grown a bit weirder, and odd is exactly what Steve needs right now.  Magic is what Steve needs right now. He knows Jonathan still feels something–he saw it in Jonathan’s eyes, in the way his fists had shook against his crossed arms. It wasn’t Jonathan’s heart that had made that decision, but his head, that infernal logic that’s been trained by years of abuse from a deadbeat father that said it was better to cut and run before you end up with a fist against your teeth.

in throes of increasing wonder: an interview with the vampire au i haven't touched in a hot second but never say never amiright lol

working on this one has been most exciting for me because it's set in New Orleans, a city i have spent a lot of time in!! i haven't really seen any byler fics where they're in the south (which like,,,i understand bc the south is The South,,,,,,but also there is some cool stuff here, and not everyone is horrible, right?). so when i have worked on it, it's been fun to incorporate my own knowledge and experiences with the city into my writing. i also will die on the hill that most US cities are largely the same and don't have much variance, but i do think New Orleans stands apart from the rest and has its own really unique vibe/culture. i know every major city will say but like,,,do they have Mardi Gras? do they have king cakes and jambalaya and beignets and a city that sits below sea level? no. they do not.

here's a snippet!

He approaches the mirror, and he examines the damage. Spots speckle all up and down his throat; when he tugs at his collar, they continue down his clavicles and shoulders. His lips are swollen and his hair is a mess, but what draws him in most is the bite. That’s all it can be–what it has to be. Teeth marks, sharp and punctuated against his skin, blood crusted around where the openings have swollen shut. He presses at them, flinches at the throbs of pain they send like shockwaves up to his head, which spins with dizzying delight. More dried blood flakes off and falls like crimson snow against his shirt, which he dutifully swipes away with a half-hearted hand. 

It’s not the strangest thing, especially in a place like New Orleans. He’s seen plenty of people in the wake of a passionate night out with all sorts of discombobulation: torn clothes, patches of hair missing, teeth fillings scraped out and matching tattoos scrawled into each other’s skin. It just means he has to wait for it to heal, to cover his neck like he’d have to anyway. Damn the October warmth; the least he could’ve done is have the foresight to do this in January or February, where he could at least put on a scarf.

thanks again Lark!! i'm wishing you all the best and sending you the best of vibes for writing fantasy au pt 2 :] 💜💜💜

[nehswritesstuffs]

Ask game! 💋💥💞💫

Ooooh, yay! Thank you~

This got kind of long, so my answers are under the cut!

💋when you leave comments on a fic, do you want to hear back from the writer?

Yes! It's rare for me to not want to hear back, but I know and understand that sometimes you got nothing else to say, since I've been on that end too.

💥find your least kudos'd fic - say something wonderful about it.

That would be TTOU Big Finish Snippet: Workplace Security [AO3] with its all of THREE KUDOS! *paper confetti* I really enjoyed writing something for The Thick of UNIT that was Jamie, Sam, and Bismuth. One of the great things about both Doctor Who and The Thick of It is the side characters and what they can bring to the story. While Doctor Who is able to access all of time and space with its side characters and give us more Human voices to lean upon for anywhere from an episode to a whole series/season, the side characters in The Thick of It give us a sense of just how many cogs are in the system and how big and far-reaching everything is, especially what the ministers and aides are cocking up. It's a reminder of all the banal shit in a government or other large organization and how much of said shit happens and yet you have to carry on best you can. Here we're able to explore all of those concepts in a short audio script fic that has no shortage of Bismuth attempting to figure things out, Sam being a sort of grounding force, and Jamie being... well... Jamie. my next-least at five is the beginnings of a rewrite of an old One Piece fic i haven't touched in years and i really need to get back on that bc i haven't touched the rewrite in more than a few months lol i'm too many dozens of thousands of words into the conceptualization to just drop it at this point

💞what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language

I'm going to answer this in regards to fan fiction only, since it has factors that don't impact published original fiction and vice versa. A tough one, but I would have to honestly say it's a weird combination of factors that can vary if certain criteria are met. Sometimes I begin to go through a fic where something's not up to snuff and I'll go "I'll entertain this for now" and it's lead to some surprising things. Part of this I think comes from cutting my fandom teeth with varying anime as a teen back in the 2000s. One of the things that I think makes sense when you think about it but we're easily able to take for granted is that one can utilize fandom as experimentation and practicing and figuring shit out. For some people, that's learning how to write a story. Others might know how to make words do things (wording is hard!), but they need practice at worldbuilding and storycraft. Some are trying to figure out how to stay consistent with a character, while on the opposite end of that, there's shit so silly that it can't help but be funny. If there's the right balance, then there are definitely things I can look over, but too many infractions clashing with one another and whoops Nehs out. There's also people who use fandom to practice foreign language skills in general. We see it often with weebs learning Japanese, but it also goes with people writing in English-as-a-Second-Language too. I've seen some really questionably-crafted stories that were rife with spelling and technical errors, but the soul of the story is there, if that makes any sense. They KNOW the characters, they KNOW what they want to tell, they KNOW how to get everything across in every possible way, and probably write really well in their native language, but in English...? They're working on it. And that's great! Part of me wants to branch out into that sort of thing one day, but the problem is that the communities whose languages I'm trying to learn are already very bilingual in English. But yeah... because all of those things were so weird and fluid and just desperately wanted in Anglophone weeb spaces FFN that it made sense to take what we could and encourage others when it came to writing about our anime blorbos. I dunno about everyone else's experience, but I rarely was in the middle of flame wars, so most of my fandom experience tended to be pretty cool. Also, having ESL family helps. It's no joke that it's hard translating everything in your head before you say it--some stuff gets lost in translation... literally!

💫what is your favorite kind of comment/feedback?

In lieu of a mini book report like was common in my teen years (lol), I really enjoy the ones that take something(s) that the reader liked about the story/chapter and picks it all apart. It could just be that they really liked a line or exchange of dialogue, or mentioning how events are going and how that messes with the story, or using context clues to try to parse out what's coming next. Knowing what clicks and whirs and gets into people's brain is so interesting to me and I love getting that information because then that's stuff for me to figure out as well about my writing and how it interacts with folks. Bonus points when someone does it on a by-chapter basis and/or on older stuff! I do also appreciate when someone legitimately corrects me, lol, 'cause Lord knows I'm not perfect.

Anyone else interested in having me answer some questions as I avoid writing actual fic? See what other prompts there are here.