#i really need like a check please renaissance

[zimmseric]

them!!

[synergysilhouette]

10 Disney hot takes/unpopular opinions (Part 7)

I'm sure the title is self-explanatory. You know the drill! Check out part 6 here.

Phoebus is Disney's best main-supporting character--I know I stated this objectively, but obviously "best" is subjective. I always appreciated his kindness and strength, and while he doesn't really grow in viewpoint since he always has a strong moral compass, his allegiance changes, and we love to see it when a good guy stops working for the bad guy! Only wish he got to sing.

2. Aurora's dress is the best Disney princess gown--I think it's because of the uniqueness of it; the sharp elements instead of rounded aspects, as well as the pink color (which helps her stand out; blue pits her against Tiana, Jasmine, and Cinderella). Plus I love when merchandising gives her a blue AND pink dress.

3. Eric should've sang in the musical and he and Ariel should've gotten to talk after the battle--I'm glad other adaptations (the live-action remake, the Broadway adaptation, and the anniversary special) have fixed the singing part, but I do feel like it was a missed opportunity to not have Eric sing in the film. It's kind of disappointing actually that it's actually other characters who sing most of the songs rather than the main character (who only gets 1.5 songs) and her love interest. Plus I always wished we got a reconciliation scene between Ariel and Eric rather than a "back to square one" approach they did.

4. I think Disney could get away with more (censored) violence--Kind of an oxymoron, but what I mean is that "Pocahontas" and "Mulan" got away with violence in a way that was still digestible for a younger audience. Not saying that every Disney film needs a lot of violence, but when violence is warranted, they can do so by getting creative with how it's shown, rather than it being offscreen or skipped over.

5. Mirabel should be a Disney princess--I know some people see the DP line as kind of elitist and only admitting "a certain type" of heroine, but aside from adding diversity to the line by being the first Latin-American princess/first South American princess/first Disney princess with glasses, she's also a well-written character who's personality and heart makes her join the line without feeling like she's just there for the sake of optics.

6. "If I Never Knew You" is the greatest Disney love song--I've said it before, but not on a hot take post. It stands out as a song that isn't about the sweetest moments of love, but the darkest elements and consequences of love. Not saying I want the next Disney couple to have a sad ending like Pocahontas and John Smith, but a love song when all seems lost is really unique, and I kinda wonder if this song would've won an Oscar if it had been included in the final cut.

7. We need more complex stories with complex antagonists--I feel like Disney has started telling more complex storylines with "Frozen," "Zootopia," "Big Hero 6," "Encanto," and "Raya and the Last Dragon," and I want them to continue to. Obviously you want a story with a happy ending and something to please the kids who may want something uplifting, but that doesn't mean you can't have more grey-area movies with the protagonist having to change/grow their perspective, and the antagonist not necessarily being a villain.

8. "Tangled" is the wrong movie for Disney on Broadway to be working on--While I understand that it's a popular film, there are renaissance films that should've gotten that treatment before, as well as "Moana" and "Encanto" feeling like better ideas, especially in order to capitalize on their viral impact.

9. "Frozen 2" has the most (emotionally) impactful soundtrack of the Revival Era--I've thought a lot about this, but while Disney always has an emotional song or two in their musicals, "Frozen 2" is an emotional journey from start to end; even the fun songs like "Some Things Never Change," "Lost in the Woods," and "When I'm Older" have a profound meaning to them, a sense of change that Disney should've brought into the 2020s with them. While I found the film narratively clunky, all of the songs (even the ones I wasn't big on) still left me with a feeling of fufillment, like I had just went on an amazing journey of self-discovery. Mature movies like that usually aren't musicals, so I'm glad this was.

10. The Bronze Age is one of my least-favorite Disney Eras--If you know my channel, you know my opinion on animal-centric films; not a fan, with "Zootopia" being an exception because I loved the plot AND they were somewhat human in the world/setting. Almost all of Disney's films during this era were animal-centric, and none of them were good enough for me to be engaged. And while I find "The Black Cauldron" underrated, I do kinda wish Disney had made it a musical instead.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Common Knowledge 1

Warnings: non/dubcon, power imbalance, bullying, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

Characters: Geralt of Rivia, Harald Halfdansson, tall & plus-size reader

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

You unfurl the strip of legal pad, marked with Professor Halfdansson's messy and pointed writing. The usual scribble that has you squinting at your returned papers. He must be the only instructor in the college that still handmarks his assignment.

Like much of his style, his slanted cursive is chaotic. Often, his lectures or spiraling tangents about his trips to Norway or some mythos unrelated to the topic at hand. He is a well of knowledge, but one which is often overflowing and bottomless.

The subject is far from your first choice. You prefer history with a human subject. Your intrigue is those events which truly occurred, people who once walked the same earth as yourself. Mythos and belief is a human creation but it hardly captures your imagination.

Along your search for title jotted onto the scrap, you find several other books to sate your personal preferences. A book on the Beothuk and their demise and another illustrated index of Renaissance art. Finally, you find the rear corner of the store, the mythology shelves nestled behind Spirituality and New Age.

You hover your finger before the rows and lean in, squinting through your lenses as you search out the rather Nordic-sounding name. You sense a shadow at the end of the aisle but do not look over. You'll just be on your way once you-- there it is.

You pinch the spine of the deep blue tome and slide it out. The cover is stamped with gold runes and lettering, a viking helm the central image. You double-check that it matches the professor's scrawl, however you can never be sure as his Fs look like Ss.

You set it flat on your armful of book, balancing the weight with the rest as you crumple the scrap and tuck it into your pocket. It's a bit more than you want to spend but it will be useful in maintaining your average through Halfdansson's course.

The shadow comes closer and you shift out of the way for the approaching customer. You sidle away as they huff, a breath that fans around them. He leans into the shelf and you sense his head shift and his gaze follow your slow retreat.

"Ah, you are a fan of vikings?" He asks, stopping you in your tracks. "You must've watched the show, hm? Cute series but not very accurate, you know?"

You blink, taken aback but his tone and his assumption. It isn't the first time you've met the attitude in your chosen discipline. When it comes to military history or the lives of vaunted men, there is often an intonation towards female scholars. You have been dismissed more than once.

"Never seen it," you lie, "you seem the type though."

You note his snow white hair, a peculiar shade, drawn back into a half pony, and his blindingly pale eyes. He wears a tunic better housed in the closet of a LARPing club and looms with an air of indignation. He puts a thick hand on the shelf and leans, no doubt used to towering over others.

"Funny, that is the very book I came for," he intones.

"Oh, what a coincidence."

HIs jaw ticks and he snorts, "seems you've found quite the lot--"

"I have. A whole trove."

You go to turn away and hear his sole clomp down behind you, "surely you can grab another encyclopedia. I really need that one."

"Uh, no, this is what I need."

He follows you down the aisle as you keep a quick step, uneasy at how he trails you so fervently.

"Maybe you should grab another one."

"I have all the others. I've been waiting months for that to come into stock," he insists.

"Well, you can find a kiosk and order one in--"

"On a three month backorder," he interjects and grabs your arm. "I'll pay you--"

You spin back to face him and hit his chest with your books, "don't touch me."

"Well, just..." he retracts his hand, "hold up. I'm trying to talk to you. To barter--"

"I'm sorry, but I need this book for class," you hug the books and back up, overly aware of the tingliness from where he grabbed you. You don't like being touched. At all. You can feel your heart pumping.

"Does the school not have a library, little girl?"

Your mouth falls open. Little girl? This guy just can't help himself. You haven't been rude, maybe matter-of-fact, but he's been downright mean.

"Not for sale," you push your shoulders up and back away.

You twist on your heel and speed away. You weave between the shelves and discount tables and join the winding queue at the counter. You don't look back and sway in your boots, waiting your turn.

"I could give you several recommendations for an alternate text," the man appears at your side, crowding you inside the black cords that rein in the queuing customers.

You ignore him and turn your head away. You wish he'd just take a hint. If you heard a single please or any sort of respect, you might consider it. He's only been a jackass and judging at first glance, he's too old for that.

"You don't need it–"

You move with the line and he growls, shifting with you.

"Look, girl–"

You snap your head back and give him a glare. He sucks in one cheek and exhales heavily, "miss, I am asking you nicely–"

The associate at the counter calls for next and you take your cue. You quickly cross the space and put your haul onto the wooden ledge. You hear the pushy stranger snarl something under his breath. You refuse to look back as you hand over your membership card.

Men like that are the very reason you despise the general public. Hard to fathom how you can be so intrigued by the human condition when you can hardly bear to be around other people.

[some-stars]

so my sister is visiting this week and ofc with all four of us here there are a lot of Feelings in the air, and apparently the way i cope with that is to dive deep into my #1 comfort fandom & pairing of all time, which is, of course, dark angel and max/alec, who i will be shipping on my deathbed. the show isn't streaming anywhere and it's never going to be, it's buried in the disney vaults (it was on fox originally) and they're never ever ever going to let it out, but it was SO good and if there were any justice in the world i'd be allowed to see 2024 fandom's take on the greatest and most important OTP of all time ever.

if you have not watched the show and are wondering how a 2 season science fiction/action show from 2000 can possibly have given us the greatest pairing of All Time, you need to think about all the ~energy that jensen ackles brought to supernatural that made destiel the force that it became, and then picture him (8 years younger than s4 of spn) pouring all that energy into depicting how his secondary character was deeply, deeply in love with the heroine of the show, and TPTB had a clear mandate to keep her with her assigned love interest but several of the writers just as clearly shipped her with alec, who was demonstrably more interesting and better to and for her. and then in the middle of all that throw an early cancellation RIGHT after setting up max and alec as the leader & lieutenant of a mutant resistance movement, in a location where the assigned love interest literally couldn't go without dying (also he and max can't touch for sci-fi macguffin reasons and have just spent a miserable season pining after never even getting to fuck once). and alec is just doing that ackles-style Quiet Self-Abnegating Devotion the entire time. it's fucking LETHAL. i never stood a chance.

(also young jessica alba was not half bad as an actor herself! but she's definitely not the driving force behind the Energy between them in every single scene, although her and jensen do have fantastic chemistry)

anyway this is i think the saddest thing in my life, that there's never going to be a second dark angel renaissance (the first was after spn got big, ofc). and since it originally aired in 2000-2001, and then had a second burst of fandom popularity from like 2007-2010, there's not a lot on ao3 either. it's basically just my one fic, a whole blessed bunch of good stuff from victoria_p, and 4-5 other stories that are decent to good. and that's it. for the most beautiful important meaningful in love pairing of all time ever forever. life is not fair. anyway it is available on various illegal streaming sites and also secondhand DVDs and you should REALLY check it out, bc there are many other things to recommend it besides the world's best ship that i did not get into here. season one is objectively better but alec shows up in season two, so i recommend watching both. and then PLEASE come talk to me, i have ONE (1) friend who's into it and i'm dying.

[wolfertinger]

"Please keep anon for privacy + so I dont get harassed by Salem's flying monkey

As someone that's in a few well-known furry circles... the amount of support he gets publicly for someone so privately despised is something funny asf. I can't post screens, again for safety, but every. time. he posts. my feed is full of vagues about how sick they are of seeing his ugly rabbit and how they're just waiting for him to inevitably fuck up already and ditch this persona like he did last time...

Majority of the time it's minor bitching like despite being a furry, why he exclusively draws his anthros with uncanny anime girl faces and only draws skin textures despite drawing *furries*, or how cringe it was referring to yourself as a modern Renaissance painter while saying that everyone that doesn't draw like you is a "no note andy". Yeah brother, a lot of your mutuals saw that and didn't fuck with it, that kind of attitude in art circles is rotten asf. No one likes a self absorbed dick that punches down on the less talented, doesn't matter how good you draw, it's social suicide. Don't be a dick.

The more he posts the more people are slowly waking up to his fetishization thoug. Even saw a pretty popular artist the other day go full DNI if you interact with him.

I really don't wish ill on Salem but it is a bit cathartic, finally seeing people say what was on everyone's mind... I'd say he needs a reality check but his cards have already started to fall. The tides are turning and it's no ones fault but his. "

[skepticbeliever-bookclub]

O' our beloved fellow shippers & readers

This week we celebrated our 100th round. That means we have been doing this long enough to have read 100 fics give or take since the founding of our sweet little club. This mod is honoured to be at the helm of a fun practice that has brought quite a few of us together and introduced us to some great titles. In celebration, we decided to host a Renaissance Round. This meant, we wanted nominations from any of the first 31 reads we've done as a club and would you believe it? The members voted in the very first fic we ever read as a club.

Made it so Far in Time by addandsubtract

This is one of those true underrated classics. Written in 2018 Buzzfeed era but so prescient with characterisation, many of the members couldn't help picturing 2022!Ryan with the above pictured Shane in college. Time-travel really gave us a gift and this fic gave us all we needed for a world where the guy in this photo meets a Ryan who already knows him.

Rating: E

Summary: “I’m, uh. I’m pretty sure the you I’m friends with is older,” Ryan says, and then winces.

Book Club Thoughts

i appreciate, as well, that if anyone's going to end up with this weird time travel situation and just roll with it, it would be them. like yeah, ryan could freak out, but shane is there which is a calming factor. and shane's brain is probably just frozen (both by what's happening and by the hot guy who just woke up in his room)

I would love to read a Shane pov of this. And how this changes everything

What fascinates me throughout the fic is how much less guarded college Shane is

this fic is so cute and good I want to just hold it in my mouth

I love the plot twist of Shane actually caring about Ryan a lot, because with time travel scenarios you think "oh he probably forgot about this" but here we have Shane in deep very much in love with Ryan for 10 years maybe more

so much of the hindsight of their situation is muted behind what Shane doesn't say in these scenes but his body language is explosive with years of pining and dashed hopes

Also imagine being like 20 and losing your vcard to a 28 year old Ryan bergara

what i thought was so interesting was that young!shane was kind of a chill cool dude, like the early versions of shane characterization in the fandom, while the fully fledged adult shane was much closer to how we now characterize him

WOULD YOU LIKE TO JOIN US FOR OUR NEXT DISCUSSION? CHECK OUT THE FAQ, AND SEND US AN ASK! IF YOU’RE LOOKING FOR FIC RECS, PLEASE CHECK OUT OUR READS, NOMINEES AND BOOK CLUB REC LISTS!

[in-the-pocket]

Hey! Personal jazz enthusiast blog here and saw you interact with my blog a few days back. You've got a really cool blog concept!

Just curious, are you into the history of jazz/lindy? I've been thinking a lot about how 'white' it appears to be as of late. No bad thoughts about your character! I just mean in general. Hope to hear your thoughts! :)

[ OOC:

Hey! Thanks for the compliment and checking out the random blog that probably liked some vintage photos and music posts lol. I genuinely appreciate it.

Next, absolutely no offense taken. The Toni (me) behind this blog is a POC and damn proud of it. <3 Honestly? You're right. There's a lot of discourse about this very thing in the Lindy Hop community because of dancers around the world that are the modern faces of the community. Laura Glaess is a great example. Phenomenal follow, truly innovative and so expressive and retains the spirit and character of traditional vernacular/solo jazz dancing. Pop in "lindy how to" in Youtube and she's always gonna be in the top results.

To be so forreal with you, personally, it doesn't bother me when it comes to the big names in the jazz/lindy world. Y'know why? Because they appreciate the history and roots of the very music they revolve their lives around. And you have awesome big faces in the communities who are BIPOC, like Tim Christopher (who I've danced with, btw, he's fucking insane-- such a clear lead, so smooth, literally effortless for him. He's also insanely encouraging lol) who keep the history alive and educate people.

The white-washing of jazz and swing bothers me when we talk about popular media and more casual members of the two communities that simply don't care enough to learn about the foundations. Which is fucking insane to me. How tf do you get to pop turn variations? Fucking practice the fundamental move of rotations. How do you hit a staccato run that suddenly turns into 3/4? You fucking. Practice normal runs. You need a foundation to build on.

So why should music history be any different?

I'm a bit more forgiving of jazz listeners only, but jazz musicians and serious dancers that say they "love the community"? Yeah nah. Being ignorant but willing to learn is one thing. Simply not caring is another. Imo it says a lot about a person, no matter how good they are.

(Keep in mind, my blog is still an infant lol. I'm curating a lot more behind the scenes to get it to the place I want it to be at.)

My aim with this blog definitely isn't to white-wash the very communities I adore/call home. Yes, Pip is white, but she's a talented musician who knows about the men and women that paved the way for her to be where she is. They were Black, dancing in the Savoy Ballroom, fueling the Harlem Renaissance and facing oppression and ridicule for it the whole time.

This is a role play blog and I don't want to be annoying lol BUT I have every intention of retaining the very heart and soul of jazz through appreciation, analysis and teaching/education posts. If you decide to stick around, those posts will be tagged under "music ed".

Thank you thank you thank you for this insightful question. I'm actually pretty pleased to know someone took a look at my blog and despite it being for role play decided to ask if I really understood where all this came from.

You're kickass for that, deadass. Thank you. ]

[mlmgaze]

Fic snippet

Post-season 1 where Daniel escapes  gracefully exits Dubai but then Armand shows up and wants his interview. And other vampires show up as things go👀!!! 

This bit is from the first Daniel Armand interaction. Add to the (beautiful wonderful) pile of fics where the “whore number” line comes back up.

“Please. I insist.”

Not letting up on his glare, Daniel pulled up his bank’s web portal in another window.

And there it was. He resisted the urge to rub his eyes like a cartoon character. After nonetheless double checking himself a few times he looked up at Armand. “What’s this supposed to be?”

“Ten million dollars.”

Daniel kept as still as he could, like Armand was the fucking T-Rex from Jurassic Park, and tried to focus on keeping his thoughts to himself. “Why?”

“I believe that was the compensation you requested to sit in a room and let someone talk to you,” Armand said mildly.

Daniel exhaled sharply and started re-working his game plan for this whole encounter. He was fully aware he should be having some reaction to getting ten mil dropped into his fucking local credit union savings account, but he was more focused on the relief that Armand hadn’t said “whore number” anywhere in his answer.

“So…what, you want your turn now? Because it went so well with your boyfriend?”

“Most of what happened that week was inadvisable. But, yes, I have some things I’d like to get ‘on the record.’”

Unfortunately, Daniel believed him. The Vampire Armand was standing in his kitchen and Daniel wasn’t dead, and the money really was there. All signs pointed to another harrowing little story time. But it wasn’t reluctance with which Daniel flicked open a new notes document. No, it was only-barely-veiled excitement. Louis had given him decades of first-person testimony to history. The kind of primary source any historian would kill for. If he played his cards right, Armand could give him centuries of it. No academic would ever believe a word of it but Daniel would know. And he was desperate for it.

“All right, I accept.” He tried for a stern, unshakeable glare. “If you’re serious.”

Armand didn’t even blink. “I’m quite serious.”

“Okay.” Daniel gave a cursory shove to his glasses and dove in. “First question: Where’s Louis? And what did you tell that made him hit the road that fast?”

“I don’t think we’ll be starting tonight, Daniel.” Armand finally broke eye contact and glanced down to begin buttoning his coat. “Five hundred and fourteen years, remember? You need time to do your math. And your research.”

“Not a great start if you’re ignoring my first question,” Daniel commented dryly.

Armand was already at the door. “Good night, Daniel.”

“Yeah,” Daniel grumbled. He turned his attention to Google, wondering if he should go for post-war Paris or the renaissance first.

“Good luck with your taxes this year.”

Daniel snapped his head up to see Armand sporting what could only be called a shit-eating grin. And then he was gone.

Fucking vampires.

[painterofhorizons]

Merry Soon To Be Reaping! I have some Holiday Harbinger questions for you. First, do you have any objections to leather or leather-craft items? Second, what are your favorite quotes from the games? Third, what is your (or Reda's) favorite color? Thanks!

Merry Soon To Be Reaping to you, too, dear nonny!

Thank you for your ask. 😊 How exciting!

(let's use The Gif in the hope that it'll make it easier for you to find my answer)

So I don't have tools to do leather crafting myself, but I do have some nice leather items indeed. I used to be quite into middle ages and medieval markets in my late teens and 20s (ren fairs depending on where you are, in Germany medieval markets are more common than Renaissance themed fairs) and have some kinds of small leather items from that time, like a small pouch and a few bracelets, and I have a leather cover notebook somewhere. Used to work in a store that sold Finnish products and the owner handcrafted covers for knifes (he also carved the knife handles and was a really cool dude). So I do appreciate leather made things. (the same way I do eat meat, trying to be mindful about consumption and especially on animal care and handling)

(I hope that was what your question aimed for, but if I didn't answer it to your needs please feel free to ask more/again!)

Favorite colors: mine are dusky pink and yellow. If you would ask Reda in person she wouldn't necessarily have a favorite color, but from the brain behind the character perspective I would say she finds a deep comfort in, like, neon colors in a dark night, so like a deep dark blue with neons.

Favorite quotes: 🙈🙈🙈 I really want to give you a deep, meaningful answer here - but I fear I can't really do that. That's the same way I can't name you any song titles or such, I'm so bad in remembering that kind of things. One quote that always gets me though with Reda Shepard is the very early ME1 "I'm a marine, not some tourist on vacation." towards Nihlus. It is on point with Reda's, let's say, "sense of humor"/no-bullshit-attitude.

Also anything Anderson says to/about Shepard will get me emotional.

I do remember I once had a screenshot printed out years ago and put on my desk that was a quote from a scene in 3 and quite motivational. 🤔 I did post a picture of my desk here years ago and remember someone commented on the quote, so I might be able to find it. I will comment here if I'm able to find it.

Edit: I did find the picture of my desk I was thinking of but I did not have the screenshot on it I was thinking of. 😅 Let me check if I posted a screenshot here at some point. 🤔

Edit edit: I found the ten year old screenshot I vaguely remembered. XD 💪 is this one:

Kick their asses is quite motivational isn't it? 😂

I'm sorry I'm not able to shoot you a couple of fancy quotes here other than the not a tourist one.

[himikochan]

Hey there friends- today I finished up my ribbons and checks dress!

It was a weird googling rabbit hole that got me started on this project- I was actually looking for a painting of an Italian Renaissance kirtle, but ended up finding the Peculiar Seamstress's Tartan Caramel Dress and felt inspired to do something a-historical and cozy. I ended up doing a similar silhouette because it was just so sweet on her.

I meant to finish this project in a month, but I often took breaks so I'm not feeling too hard on myself. I only used ~2.5 yards/meters of fabric (it was 60in/152cm wide, 2 full yards/meters and the last was cut to a half width) and I decided to play with this giant spool of ribbon I had!

I spent quite a while draping the bodice pattern and putting together historically constructed 16th century boned sleeves which was a treat. You can see in the first picture that I fully lined the bodice with a beautiful cotton print too. It felt really good to create a garment for the joy of the process and the materials.

The front closure is alternated hook/eye pairs and I think I might need to re-do all of them or pin some kind of stomacher behind them because it keeps breaking open. But overall, I am so pleased!

This next project, I am pretty annoyed about, actually. For FIVE years, my grandma has persistently asked me to re-line this jacket for her. For context, she is completely physically capable of doing it herself. She worked as a seamstress for YEARS and taught me to sew, but she doesn't want to re-line it herself and doesn't want to pay someone to re-line it. And I also don't want to re-line it! And she'll say I already agreed to it and I haven't! But she got my aunt to just dump it at my place and she wants to wear it for New Years!

I'm so mad!

And I guess I'm just going to do it because she's like 90!

So I spent about 2.5 hours today carefully taking out the lining. It's going to be a bitch, frankly, to re-line because it's constructed VERY well and in a very frustrating way. So there's the silk outer layer, a layer of wool flannel, and then the shredded silk lining.

Unfortunately, the seams are all done in a super duper traditional Japanese style where the layers are machine stitched together and then tailor tacked so the layers are all offset to have a nice soft fold to each of the edges. I'm not really sure how to explain it more clearly.

But basically every piece is sewn together many more times than they usually are and I cannot rip out the seams because I cannot put it together in a way that will hang as prettily as it does on the body now.

What I need to do is carefully cut the lining fabric where it is sewn down (but not cut the seam), re-create the lining as a bag lining, install the lining at the cuffs/edges like you would normally, and then tack them to the garment at the side seams too.

So far today, I spent 2.5 hours carefully cutting the shredded silk. And then I discovered the fabric she wants it re-lined in is a cheap thick polyester!! Ugh!!!!!!!!

[not-so-mundane-after-all]

"About the Blogger" Meme

@ambeauty thanks for tagging me, love 💕

Star Sign(s): All I know is that it's Pisces. What does that mean really? No clue, never checked.

Favorite holidays: Halloween, even though it's not that wildly celebrated where I’m from, barely at all. But I love watching the craze about it online and participate in online celebrations. Other than that, Christmas, because of food and family.

Last meal: one of my favorite traditional Polish dishes - bigos

Current Favorite Musician: Does Rachel Zegler count? Because I am obsessed with The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes Soundtrack

Last Music Listened To: Marjorie by Taylor Swift and some other Evermore tracks for Evermore’s and Taylor's birthday (Dec 11th and 13th)

Last Movie Watched: in theaters - Renaissance: a film by Beyonce! Blew my mind! And at home it was my beloved Prospect - a watch party + live reaction (screaming about Cee and Ezra) with my friends the Bees on Discord. As Ezra would say, “This is so exciting!”

Last TV Show Watched: I am making my way through a Supernatural rewatch, finished 7x05 last night. I’m excited to finally be on S7 because S7 introduces my favorite female character ever, Charlie Bradbury!

Last Book/Fic Finished: Book - The Rule of Wolves by Leigh Bardugo (right before S&B was c*nceled, not fuckin fair), and Fic - “The Stag” by AFireInTheAttic about Katniss and Haymitch going hunting because I am in my Hunger Games Renaissance era and PapaHaymitch feels are roaming free

Last Book/Fic abandoned: I bought the entire The Witcher series just to struggle through the first book 🫣 the story is good but the way it's written, my god. Why do our Polish writers have to make everything so difficult? All the fat jokes and sexist jokes and misogyny, you can tell these books were written by an old grumpy douchebag. As for fics, I had to drop out of some Katniss and Haymitch fics because they had shippy undertones and weren't tagged right (please people tag your fics appropriately when it comes to relationships, I am begging on my knees)

Currently reading: Book - Percy Jackson and The Chalice of The Gods by Rick Riordan, Fic - “After All We've Been Through” by TheFelineQueen96 aka my darling @ellies-little-gun, an incredible Joel and Ellie story

Last Thing Researched for Art/Writing/Hyperfixation: spinal taps and bone marrow biopsy for my Titanstober fic I am flesh, bones... I am skin, soul… I needed to learn about this to figure out the balance between medical accuracy and using these procedures in unethical ways/as forms of torture, as I’ve seen done on some TV shows in the past, like The 100. I even rewatched those scenes for inspiration

Favorite Online Fandom Memory: as my bestie mentioned before me, definitely the day we all lost it over Brenton's birthday post dedicated to Anna. I had my phone in my hand when that notification appeared and I nearly dropped it, that's how bad I was shaking.

Favorite Old Fandom You Wish Would Drag You Back In/Have A Resurgence: probably The Magicians for me. I wasn't active in that fandom, only a little towards the end of the show, but I loved it so much and it has two very strong platonic pairs that I was absolutely obsessed with, Quentin & Julia and Margo & Eliot, and I kind of wish I could write for them. Maybe after a rewatch though 👀

Favorite Thing You Enjoy That Never Had an Active or Big "Fandom" but You Wish It Did: Let me use this part for advertising and say PROSPECT!!! WE ARE SMALL BUT MIGHTY, ALL 5 OF US! Jk there's a bit more of us, but not by much and the movie is incredible. So go watch Prospect everyone!!! Come lose your mind with us over Cee and Ezra!!!

Tempting Project You're Trying to Rein In/Don't Have Time For: My brain is flooded at the moment with Katniss and Haymitch, I already cave in and wrote one fic even though I am officially on a break till January. I want to write more for them and definitely will, but I need to go back to my two ongoing Titans projects. Only my love for writing Titans is currently the size of a dying candle flame and I am trying to stoke that fire up (rereading my own fic to get back to the story) and failing (it's not working, I got nothing)

No pressure tags for the besties @undertheknightwing @legendsofentity @skoulsons @ellies-little-gun @sotvtaughtmehowtofeel @dilf-din

[morticiafattymshasabeard]

Physical Stores you can Buy Gothic Goods in, by Morticia Fattyms

Okay you Spooks,

Let me just state that you should always wear what feels comfortable *on you* and looks good *to you*. To be Goth isn't the clothes you wear, strictly speaking, and there isn't a Defined Look. Have FUN with yourself! If you think you look good and you feel good like that, that's all that matters.

Gothic Aesthetic and Fashion is colloquially referred to as "Goth" all of the time. Goth is a term used to describe some songs, and has many musical genres that find their audience under the name of "goths". Anyone with Google-Fu understands that sometimes the simplest tag is the most effective for reaching a larger audience. To keep our wonderful community of Artists and Creators thriving, growing, and easier to navigate, I'm saying Goth, Gothic, and Alternative interchangeably or where appropriate. 

The loaded question,

"What makes something Goth?/Why do Goths like these things?" (Surprise, it's actually 2 questions!)

   There isn't a predisposed rule about Bats, Bauhaus, and Halloween being Goth, we just happen to like them as individual people and found people that ALSO liked them. Its a surprisingly, almost singular circle, Venn Diagram. That being said, we do tend to appreciate a lot of the same design elements, and can thus comfortably find items we enjoy by engaging with the use of word "goth". We enjoy symbolism, creative use of colors, and recycling older designs to create  newer ones. We definitely take inspiration from thousands of sources, like Victorian fashion, fetish gear, and Punk's DIY attitude. Your look should be personal to you, inspired by the things you love to engage with, and feels comfortable for you to enjoy wearing while dancing. 

That said, not everything I list in my endeavors to support the growth of our community will be strictly gothic, because there isn't a defined look to being Goth. I hope you'll still check it out, and, if you like it, support it! 

It's pretty easy to find "Gothic style" online, but do you really trust that "gothic mall online" drop shipper? Are you on a budget and shopping fast fashion apps that send clothes you end up not liking? It's okay if that's what you do, it really is. There is something to admire about the convenience and lack of social anxiety we enjoy from Online shopping. However, I want to talk about Physical Stores.

While my favorite store, Anarchists Closet, has closed, my love for that shop, it's amazing owner, and the community it brought together, is undying. Anarchist's was loudly inclusive of it's customer base, was active in the community through events, ticket sales, and fashion shows, and ensured we'd see our favorite pieces at events again and again. Their Mission was always clear: We Dress Everyone!  The world needs more Anarchist's Closets, and I'm going to Find them! 

Here's a few stores you can stomp your stacks into and play dress up in for an hour or two. Please, buy something from them. Hell, get a gift card for your friend you thought of in there if you can't find anything for yourself. The Community needs these stores to thrive so that more can be inspired to start up! Be inspired to start your own wildly unique and wonderful Alternative store for us to explore! 

This is Definitely NOT a COMPLETE list. (In fact, I got overwhelmed writing this and took forever to publish haha)

Email Gothic.info.666@gmail.com when you find places! World Wide Accepted! Please include a full street address with business' name!

Clothing Shops

Coven Dark Boutique- 63B Wharf St, Salem, Massachusetts 01970

Die with Your Boots On - 9 Church St, Salem, Massachusetts

Gothic Renaissance NYC- 110 4th Ave, New York ,New York, 10003

The House of Goth- 19014 Gulf Freeway Friendswood, Texas 77546

The Ossuary -77 Wharf Street, Salem, Massachusetts 01970

Ravens and Rockers- 14815 N. Florida Ave. Tampa, Florida

Rumors - 3 locations: Virginia & North Carolina 

Spark Pretty- 333 East 9th Street New York, New York 10003

Subculture Corsets & Clothing (BY APPT ONLY)-2604 Powers Avenue Jacksonville, Florida 

Witch Bitch Thrift -105 Whitney Ave New Haven, Connecticut

Home Decor and More 

Cemetery Pulp- 3950 E Sunset Rd, Suite 106 Las Vegas, Nevada 89120

Hail Dark Aesthetics- 2410 Gallatin Ave. Nashville, Tennessee 37206

Hail Records & Oddities- 720 Main Street Covington, Kentucky 41011

Hidden South -7124 Saint Claude Avenue Arabi, Louisiana 70032

The Weeping Glass- 746 East Warrington Ave Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania 15210

I want to end this on a small love note to a new found source of community for me: 

Alternative Markets.

We have to keep them going, to keep the Community going.

Whatever you want to call yourself, an Alternative, or Punk Rock Flea Market, Faire, or Festival is where you want to go to find the people hand-making intricate, meaningful, and life saving products. To be clear: you would be the life saver in this situation, where you buy something from a creator, offsetting the cost of the booth rental and travel costs that can really cut into budgets. Many people have conditions that make working regular jobs difficult, vending at markets are often a good source of income for them. Additionally, they're a fantastic opportunity to find a new favorite Local Band to support as well! Whoa! That's a 2 for One, Pal! Score! 

     Many are free, or have free parking but charge entry. I do suggest taking enough cash for your daily purchases, just in case there's bad signal in the area, a Food truck can't take digital payments, or you decide to buy a local band a drink.

Thanks for reading! Let me know if you find any local physical shops I should add to future blog posts.

 Also, let me know about events happening near you! Gothic. Info. 666 is building a network of event promotion for the Goth/Alternative communities, and we'd love to have your help! 

We'll be posting submission guidelines soon! 

[dykeza]

Edit: this post is too long it’s going under read more so I don’t feel as evil tagging it okay thanks. Hi guys it’s me the asshole again can I say smth possibly controversial and tone deaf? Okay thanks .

I think a terrible amount of backlash towards SSO is done under the assumption that SSO is a small team that became a large Horse Game Corporation with a monopoly on Horse Games in the last 13 years . This is not true. SSO is still a small game worked on by a small team (there’s frequent posts on their instagram featuring basically the whole team— including like the Singular Lady that models all the horses. Like that’s One Person, Maybe More but Not A Lot More). Just bc it has more polish does not mean it’s suddenly not made by a small team in a likely rented office space who strive to pay their workers fairly. Lots of ppl on Reddit saying shit like “I wonder if the higher-ups at the sso company make it so the designers can’t do whatever they want :(“ There aren’t any higher-ups. It’s important to me that you know that. SSO hiking prices and lowering rewards and releasing smaller and smaller updates CAN be a bit shitty, I’m not saying it’s not. I’m saying there’s nuance that’s lost when a bunch of primarily older teenaged and adult women and queer ppl— (I am aware how insane that sounds but I don’t think many straight cis dudes are rockin with the horse game, and if they are they’re not the majority) —are yelling in Instagram comment sections about how shitty the SSO dev team is because they (checks notes) have to raise the prices of their horse game because they have to maintain a livable wage for themselves, pay rent and utility bills on their machines and spaces that they need to even make the game, and pay for marketing and other expenses, in a global post-Covid hyper-inflated economy. So woe is you that star coins cost more. A 10k star coin gift card used to be 108 dollars around my neck of the woods (America) and now it’s 79.99. That’s less money btw in case you can’t do math because you’re too blinded by your rage over game designers, artists, developers, and coders being paid more than peanuts to update the same fucking game for 13 years WEEKLY. Okay man. Whatever. Old man yelling at cloud over here. A lot of this has been building for months-years now but the Medieval Arena update really like, made it apparent to me for some reason. Maybe it’s cuz I like the update I think it’s cute I think it’s nice and small and quaint. But like— it’s So Obvious that the Medieval Arena and all its little additions and the future ones were made by a small team of people who just, wanted to have a fun Renaissance Fair in their game that they make. Bc yknow, again, they’re updating and making a game that they are paid to update and make because they want to update and make it. Sorry you don’t like shitty jousting mechanics and a cute lil fairground . Do you also hate the sun for shining? Oh you miss the old events? Oh you hate that sso is all corporate and lifeless now? Should we tell everyone? Should we invite Bella Hadid? Have you even once considered that maybe the people who make the game are People making a Game, and they can do whatever they want with their game? You, yes you, can also do whatever you want. You have the hands that create. You don’t get mad at an artist with a canvas and paints for doing art the wrong way, right? So why is it okay to get mad at an artist with a computer and a coding software for doing art the wrong way? Every horse, building, character, clothing, tack, tree, bush, boat, car, and all the hundreds of other things in this game are made by hand by dedicated people but yeah, you’re mad that they Chose To Do Something THEY Wanted To Do over doing the thirteenth birthday event in a row to appease a bunch of people who never seem to be happy with their art anyway. Fuck off. Sorry for yelling. I’m not sorry but sorry for yelling. Please die.

[astrid-delacour]

more things my friends have said as marauders quotes

Barty: sperm shaped drinks are the best kind of drinks

Lily: I do what I want /DEBAUCHERY

Pandora: did you just use debauchery as tone tag

James: sleep paralysis possum

Remus: I'm like a functional alcoholic

Evan: I'm not edgy but my friend had a dream last year

Marlene: he's so basic I can't see him

Sirius: do they make foot lingerie

Sirius: you look like the grinches dog

Evan: I would never call the ace alliance it's legal name in casual conversation

Mary: your hair is the colour of the devil

Sirius: it's not gay if we both have girlfriends

Regulus: I am better at the tism cause I make the noise

Lily: who drew balls on my board?!

James: I'm like Thomas Edison and you're that welsh dude

Remus: Stalin?

Regulus: I'm mean but not detriment to dental hygiene mean

Sirius: this is the one thing the Catholic Church would back me up on

Marlene: she's so mommy, I want to use her thighs as earmuffs

James: give me the fucking magnet back you hoe

James: we do not call 12 ear olds hot in this establishment

Barty: are you a Rick or morty?

Evan: idk

Barty: I feel like you're a rick cause you're autistic

Barty: I'm a whore for jack skellington

Dorcas: I'm a whore for sally

Lily: omg we're literally the bubonic plague

James: whatever fruits your loops

Sirius: I'm not to gay for anything, except heterosexual relationships

Remus: that takes a level of common sense I don't have

Barty: I've added a sneeze for every year of my life

Sirius: "*takes dramatic bow and twirls hair like a Renaissance girl who's secretly a witch*"

Marlene: fuck you and your two prong fork I have a seven prong fork

Marlene: she's a bitch but I love her that's my opinion of her (about dorcas)

Regulus: take an IQ test rn and while you're at it take an "am I gay" quiz

Regulus: ok 1684 the men were being whores and the girls were being whores (describing his family)

Mary: can you guys stop being horny on main please? (Talking about Canada)

Lily: nothing goes harder than the electoral college at homecoming

Pandora: I'm still on my autism high

James: you never know how fast you're walking until you body check a wall

Barty: it's really hot when you hear the tortured screams of a child predator dying

James: no one pulls my leg on leg day

James: thank sweet cheesus

Dorcas: it's a requirement

Evan: THATS A LIE. That is a LIE

Dorcas: it definitely is....

Evan: sweet lord Jesus

first year: vou have to come vou stand in line and have chicken fingers

Dorcas: I'm signing you up for Tuesday

Evan: I hate you

(In a baby voice) Sirius: I'm wubber wou're gwue what ever bounces off me stwicks to WOU

(Also baby voice) Marlene: jwokes on wou I'm cement *closes door and leaves*

Sirius: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!?!? MARLENE! MARLENEEEE

James: so we've got a white a black and a Hispanic. I love cultural diversity 

Mary: ohhhh so he PlaysTM golf

Mary: right person wrong time except by wrong time you just don't like him and right person you mean he's ugly

Mary: I hot girl summered a little too close to the sun

Lily: you would put an e minor in there

Mary: Marlene needs to be spayed

Marlene: you're like garage band

Dorcas: Lily I think my song is killing Marry

Lily: good

Lily: it needs a little more work and by a little I mean I haven't started it

Dorcas: this is not a no judgement zone, this is a very judgement zone

Sirius: dairy-free, gluten-free, uhh vegan-free, it's all the frees

Dorcas: how self sabotagey are we feeling today

James: .... functionable

Peter/Remus: what? did you just say functionable?

James: ....veah

Peter: it's functional

James: seriously?!?!

Remus: yeahhhh

James: I was homeschooled ok!

Remus: how long have you been saying it like that?

James: anyways...

Dorcas: I'm not getting that sappy! They don't deserve that!!

Mary: your eyebrows are like 3 business days from your eyelids

Marlene: that is the bassiest bass

Mary: sometimes you just have to accept the crack

Peter: James would be a court jester

Pandora: that's very hannon-y

Pandora: like power ballad but make it cats

Lily: how loving should be as easy as ...?

Marlene: COW

Marlene: like cow eat grass

Mary: loving should be as easy as 'insert metaphor here'

[white-poppie]

How Ran Likes em'

Characters:  Ran Haitani x reader Genre: Crime AU Warnings: casino, poker, gambling, drinking, suggestiveness Writer: @ white-poppie

Song recommendation:  Gangsta by Kehlani

This fic is an excerpt from my book:  L'appel du vide  (Please check it out !!)

Tokyo Revengers (東京リベンジャーズ)

"Wait how did I lose again?" you pouted fakely, staring at the dice. 

You liked the black dress that you were forced to wear. A tight bodice that fell till your knees and renaissance-style puffy sleeves that adored your shoulders. 

Your phone lay in your purse, connected to it was a chip, Naoto and Mitsuya could hear everything.

"You bet 5 and it landed on 6," the man chuckled at your unknowingness, "first time here?"

"Yeah, my friend said she would be here, but she cancelled at the last minute, so I thought why not try a hand when I am already here," you muttered, "but I am failing miserably!"

"Wish someone could teach me though," you whispered softly, but loud enough for your prey, no rather your hunter to hear.

Cloudy violet eyes travelled across the table, meeting your gaze, you pretended to squeak in surprise at the encounter (which wasn't really pretence, because, boy were you scared.)

Ran raised his eyebrows at your reaction, a little toothy smirk adorning his porcelain face.

He walked over to your table, a hand swirling the Vodka glass in his hands, standing behind you, he chuckled when you visibly tensed at your position.

"Need a hand, pretty?" he said huskily and you shivered in slight fear, "I'll help you with the game."

"That- would be g-great thank you" you answered, suddenly the corset wrapped around your waist felt much tighter.

"Are you from Japan?" he questioned

You fake gasped and smiled, "yes! you too sir?"

"Mhm," he smiled, secretly liking the fact that you addressed him as 'sir.'

✅: Ran loves being called sir.

He looked at the host, "what game you playin'?"

"Hazard," he answered.

"Ooh, a simple one," he said breathily, "Listen, doll,  you'll be given two dies, choose a number between 5 and 9 and roll, you get money or get money taken from each right or wrong answer."

"Got it," you nodded taking the dice in your hands. Shaking them in your hands.

"Pick a number," the host asked.

"7," you answered and rolled the die and it landed on 7!

You smiled at the host, he passed you the 20000 yen ($150)

"Ooh~ you are a first learner," Ran grinned.

"I calculated the median (middle value) as soon as I understood the rules, a high chance of a win," you answered sweetly.

"Impressive."

✅: Ran likes em' smart

"Say, doll, wanna watch me play poker?" he asked and you nodded shyly, how pretentious.

Ran chuckled and guided you to the poker table, everyone there just screamed 'rich' without even uttering a single word. The wooden table glinted under the yellow light, people wearing suits and their women practically stuck to them with glue.

"Give me the deck," he told a man who looked like he was in his forties.

"Eh? It's my turn right now!" he panted out, keeping a hand on the woman's spine who sat on his lap.

Ran smiled and took out the gun that was tucked under his shirt and kept it on the table, a kind smile was etched on his face, "the deck, old man."

The man gulped ad handed him the deck, and the lady squeaked in terror. "Let's go," he told her and left his seat, another man took the opportunity and sat opposite to Ran.

"Didn't know guns were allowed at Casinos," you said as calmly as possible.

"They aren't, but people make an exception f' me," he looked at you and winked. A few seconds of quiet went by as he spoke again, "what's wrong, doll, scared?"

"More like intrigued," you said cheerily.

Ran chuckled at your response, "aren't you an interesting one."

"By the way, I didn't catch your name yet," you asked.

This made him suddenly go stiff and for the first time tonight, you feared for your life.

"Usually I don't answer when people ask me this, but it's Haitani Ran."

"Ash(Hai) Valley(Tani) and Orchid (Ran), you have a pretty name."

✅: Ran likes em' occasionally bold

Ran laughed at your etymology of his name, "how adorable," he whispered, "let's start the game, shall we?"

Saying that Ran Haitani had skilled hands at Poker would be an understatement. His nimble fingers worked quickly through the card deck, shuffling his cards in some squanderingly extravagant way.

You weren't going to lie, you were impressed.

"You are so good at this," you said staring at his hands, "like a magician."

"Wanna see some real magic doll?"

You nodded excitedly, mentally groaning at the act you had to put up.

"Get me a Martini princess, I'll win for you til' then," he chortled, giving his opponent a dangerous glint.

You nodded and walked to the bar, "one martini please."

✅: Ran likes em' obedient

Ran wasn't lying when he said he was going to show you some magic. You had absolutely no idea how he had managed to win 10 million yen ($74,300) in a matter of minutes. He extended his hand and you gave him the martini.

"Cheers," he said while bumping the glass in the air, towards his opponent, he was mocking them. The man tsked and left at his humiliation.

You clapped in delight, "sir that was amazing!"

"You were the lucky charm, pretty," he smirked and you couldn't help but cringe at his blatant flirting.

"I failed to catch your name," he asked.

"Tanaka Yumi," you smiled while placing forward a fake name Naoto had given to you.

"Tanaka Yumi, would you be interested in working for my organization?" he asked, you heartbeat lifted at his offer, he had fallen right into your trap.

 "Don't have to do much, just run a few errands, listen to everything the members say, calculate a little and most importantly, not tell a single soul where you were and what is happening inside the premises."

"May I know what is the name of the organization," you asked to appear genuine.

"Bonten." bingo.

You gasped at his statement, "Bonten as in the criminal organization?"

"Mhm," he chuckled, "you'll get a lotta money though, and if you disagree...I'll have to kill you because you know too much."

You gulped and nodded, "I-i- accept sir, I am in need of money, my brother passed away recently, he was the only one I had in my family,' you sniffled.

Ran cooed and patted your head in faux sympathy, "there, there."

You looked at the time and gasped, "I will have to leave now sir, would there be any interview for the job?"

"Nope, I am the interviewer and you are hired, come to work from tomorrow," he searched his pockets and took out a card, "remember doll, no harm will be done to you as long as you keep your mouth shut."

You nodded and bowed at him.

'Ran Haitani,' you thought.

'Tanaka Yumi,'  he pondered.

"I am going to ruin you."

Tags:  @rintaroubby @nanaseishiro @dislownini @idowritingandstuff, @bakaface @denkis111, @jazzylove,@maybeleftoverjourneys, @lordmypantsaresocool, @futuristicallykawaiiturtle, @kristaline2dmensimp, @astrofai

Tokyo Revengers (東京リベンジャーズ)

[teecupangel]

From @decaffeinedduck

I love how we all agree Altair can't cook

This overachiever needs to have at least one funny weakness for my sanity XD

Although I think it is less of Altaïr not being able to cook and more of him thinking that throwing everything in a pot counts as stew and it’s edible enough so he can have more time with other more important things like training or reading.

From @knine-nights-loves-ac

I Wanna imagine Desmond remaking something from Ezio and just getting progressively more annoyed that he can’t get it quite right until he’s literally just cursing in Italian wondering why the fuck the ratios of the spices are off

“I would like to start his video with an apology for the latter part of last video which is mostly be being censored every two or three words in. And Becs would like to apologize for not censoring two different ways I said [censored]. In Becs’ defense, my Italian is created from a marriage of someone from Florence and someone from Tuscany soooooo…”

The audio picked up someone clearing their throat from behind the camera.

Desmond sighed and rubbed his face once before continuing, “Anyway, so I lost my cool because these!”

Desmond placed the herbs and spices that he had used-

No.

He had tried to use in the last video.

“So these [censored] that you can find in supermarkets? They’re fake-”

“Desmond!” Someone hissed from behind the camera, making Desmond take a deep breath.

His next words had a hint of Italian accent that was slowly getting thicker.

“These do not taste anything like they should taste. I don’t know if it’s because they’re dried and powdered, I doubt it, that sounds something, or they added some other [censored] into this puta[censooooorrrreeeeeeddddddddd].”

The video changes to the logo of Desmond’s Youtube Channel and the words “we are having technical difficulties. Please bear with us while we (and by we, I mean me) try to fix this”

The screen stays on with a soft string music for about two minutes before returning to Desmond who was now just sitting with his hands on his face.

He took another deep breath before dropping his hands, his accent returning to his usual American accent as he said, “Sorry about that, guys. Anyway, if you really want your food to taste like it did during the Renaissance, I would suggest checking your local farmers’ market for people who sell the actual good shit [a censor that immediately stopped because the one pushing the censor button realized he missed his mark, damn it].”

“Next week, let’s go with a comforting soup that my ancestor during the American Revolutions would make when he was traveling.” Desmond waved as he said, “I’ll see you guys next week.”

.

Most upvoted comment:

“Sooooooo… anyone wants to see Desmond just lose his shit after eating ‘Italian’ fast food?” Reply: “I would pay to see him just eat Chicago pizza. I’m sure his Italian ancestor’s going to possess him again and give us that sexy Italian accent.”

so i have this idea in a Desmond lives au after the solar flare he starts a channel like tasting history with max miller in which he recreates historical dishes that his ancestors used to make with Shaun and Rebecca appearing by tasting what he makes

(The video starts with a man addressing the video in a beautiful clean kitchen)

“So this isn’t my usual content but I’ve got a lot of requests to do a reaction video on this youtube channel called ‘I Am Not My Ancestors’ where he recreates recipes he got from his ancestors. At least, that’s what he claims. A lot of you asked me to check if his recipes are what a household from that time period would make and I asked Desmond, he’s the owner of I’m Not My Ancestor channel if he’s alright with me reacting to them and I received his permission.”

“I’d like to make it clear that he has no hand in any of my reactions. This will be the first time I’m watching the videos I’d be reacting to and there’s no script, we didn’t talk about what I should say or what I shouldn’t say. I can even show you guys his actual reply to my email.”

(The video cuts to some kind of recorder, most probably a phone camera, aimed at the screen of a monitor showing an opened email)

Subject: Re: Requesting permissions to react to your videos

Sender: Desmond M iamnotmyancestor@yahoo.com

yeah go ahead man.

(The video returns to the man in the kitchen)

“So with his permission… let’s check out some of his videos, shall we?”

(The video changed. On the lower left corner is the same man, now wearing earbuds. The rest of the video appears to be a screen recording of the Youtube Channel ‘I Am Not My Ancestors’. The mouse clicks on the Cooking Playlist and clicks a video titled “What an Assassin from 12th Century That Can’t Cook Cooks”)

(The video changes to a normal looking kitchen with a young man. A prominent scar mars his lips and his eyes seemed to glow gold at certain angles although it looked mostly light brown)

“So… I’ve been focusing on Renaissance Italy food for a while now and I thought I’d branch out and make something my other ancestors made. Then I remembered my ancestor from 12th century Syria doesn’t know how to cook.” The man said as he placed his hands on the counter, “But, well, let’s try it anyway.”

(The video continues with the man listening down all the ingredients he’d be using to make what he calls ‘road food’)

(The video is paused and the man on the lower left begins to speak)

“Okay, so this is one of his latest videos and I just want to talk about all the ingredients he’s using for this… ‘road food’. All of these can be bought in Syria and I’ve seen all of them used in different dishes in historical cook books. The more important part is that all of these? Can be found in the wilds during those time and I believe that he’ll tell us that these ingredients are used because they don’t cost any money, only time and a discerning eye. Let’s see if I’m right.”

(The video plays once more)

“You can also change any of the things I listed to whatever wild plants to find on your way. Normally, if your mission takes you to a place that’s more than a day ride away-”

“By horse.” Someone off camera added.

“Yeah, by horse. Thanks, Becs. Anyway, if it’s more than a day ride away, what you usually do is stay in a nearby bureau- hm? Oh, right. A bureau is what the Assassins call their… mini headquarters in other places. So they have their headquarters in Masyaf, Alamut and Ḥalab and they have bureaus on other places as well.”

(The video paused and the man on the lower left speaks once more)

“While I can’t verify his claims, the Nizaris of which the Assassins are from did have strongholds in Masyaf, Alamut and this Ḥalab is more known as Aleppo to many of us. Anyway, let’s continue.”

(The video is played once more)

“But sometimes, you go to a far away place and the supplies they give you is lacking because Al Mualim is a stingy old man who’ll tell you that ‘an Assassin must triumph over’ this kind of bullshit so you learn to live off eating game and grass-”

(The video is paused and the man on the lower left commented)

“I believe this Al Mualim he speaks of is Rashid al-Din Sinan, known as the Old Man of the Mountain. From the way he speaks, it’s either he knows Rashid himself. Or, of course, he has a journal of his ancestor who has certain words to describe Rashid. I’m sure it’s the latter.”

(The video plays once more)

“So this is what Al-”

“Your ancestor.”

(The man on the lower left tilts his head but does not pause the video)

“My ancestor would make during those ‘tiring’ times.”

(The video continues as the man starts to cook, starting from preparing a small game and then… throwing it and all the other ingredients in a pot. The man on the lower left stared at him with an open mouth.)

“Yeah, that’s it. Just wait until the meat is cooked. While you wait, you should patrol the area, check your map, write on your journal… the usual stuff.”

(The video transitions to the same place but the man is now on his phone, seemingly tapping on the screen.)

“Desmond… isn’t it cooked yet?”

“Hm? Oh, yeah. I told you guys this is the easiest shit my ancestors can cook. This is also the only thing Alta-”

“Your ancestor.”

“My ancestor can’t fucked up. Anyway, let’s have Shaun try it out.”

(As the man grabs a bowl and pours the soup in it, a man with glasses stepped to the frame with arms crossed)

“Guys, say hello to Shaun, our resident taste tester and the actual historian in our little group.”

“I’ve been tasting everything you make for these videos. They already know who I am.”

“Yeah, yeah, just taste this.”

(The man with glasses took the bowl and blew his spoon before taking a mouthful. He chewed for a moment before nodding.)

“It’s okay.”

“You're British, of course you think the lack of flavor is okay.”

“Hey.”

“Anyway, the main point of this dish is to sustain us. Good food will always be welcomed but what we need is the nutrients and energy food gives us. After we get to the bureau, we’ll have some actual good food.”

(The video pauses and changes to only show the man in the beautiful kitchen)

“Okay, so let’s talk about the recipe itself…”

(The video continues as the man list down all the ingredients and where they have appeared in historical books, referencing other recipes similar to the recipe that the video used)

“I think I should watch more videos, maybe one of his Renaissance Italy videos because it seems like this ancestor of his is quite… the ‘frugal’ and practical kind. Let me know in the comments which videos you’d like me to watch nex-

(The video stops and the laptop closes)

“Desmond, he called Altaïr frugal and practical.”

“Not because he wanted to. What do you think he did when he was traveling with Maria? That man tried out every food he saw.”

(is this in the same universe as #Da Vinci's secret lover Not-Salai? Maybe? Maybe not? idk)