#i really have to get my act together to organize information so then i can go out and expand on things ^^'

[hardware-sparks]

Uhhh your pinned post says tell me about things so… I wish we talked about Colon being Dutch more often, it isn’t an important part of his character but it means something to me. Like, Van Helsing (Dracula Famed Vampire Hunter) is ALSO Dutch, and there’s a lot we could do with them possibly being connected. There’s also a lot more cultural differences between the Netherlands and England/America, like, the Dutch swear with disease names and they’re way more comfortable with topics English and American people usually aren’t. Also, every European from a country known for its cheese I have ever met has something to say about American cheese and it’s never good ^^;

Idk, I know it isn’t that important to mention these things,, but it’s also a fun character aspect, and I think it’s neat and wanna do more things with it!

(Toast and Colon bickering during Eurovision…)

I think cultural background is also an important part of characterization! It affects how you speak, think, and dress. Also gives him more words to use because otherwise everyone sounds... too American.

[inlovewithquestionablecharacters]

Will Graham X Reader: Nightcap

Summary: Will needs a little help going to sleep after a nightmare.

Warnings: not proof read, smut, cowgirl, oral (f & m receiving), penetration ( p in v), pet names (baby), cursing, nightmares, cum eating, no use of y/n.

Word count: 1,8 K

He’s sweating through his sheets.

Even in his hazy state he can feel the cold sweat that covers his body. He tries to wake himself up but his body refuses. He’s staring at the stag before him. The animal itself isn't threatening. It's the feelings that come with it that cause Will to shake in bed. He feels something grab onto his shoulder and turns to look at what was touching him. His eyes find you, your mouth is open wide as if you were screaming but no sound comes out. He calls out your name just as his body sinks into the ground. 

Will snapped up from his bed, his heart hammering in his chest. His wet clothes cling to his body uncomfortably. He’s been in this situation before, the only difference is that this time he’s not alone. You're here with him. He feels bad for waking you up but he's glad he’s not alone. The palm of your hand warms his arm, causing him to stare at it. 

“You okay?”

“Yeah. Nightmares.”

“Are they always that bad?”

Will stops staring at your hand on him opting to look at your face. You're looking at him like a wounded animal and he hates it. But he supposes it's better than looking at him like he’s crazy.

“Not always but yeah most of them are…”

“Intense?”

“That's a word for it.”

Of course the only night he has someone sleep over he has one of the worst nightmares he’s had in months. He must have been quite loud for you to be able to hear him from another room.

“Sorry for waking you.”

“You didn’t. I couldn’t sleep. I was on my way to get a cup of water when I heard you. You sounded scared so I thought maybe I should check on you.”

Your relationship with Will was odd. You weren’t exactly friends but you weren’t just coworkers either. You’d been helping him organize information for his next class and hadn’t realized how late it had gotten. Will hated the thought of you driving in the dark because of him so he offered you a place to crash.

It was the first time you’d truly seen Will. You helped him cook dinner and the two of you had shared a bottle of wine. You talked until your eyes started to feel heavy. Will showed you to your bed and bid you goodnight. It all felt very intimate. You weren’t sleeping in his bed but this was the closest you’d been to each other outside of work. Will didn’t really know how to behave around you. He’d flush when you said anything remotely flirty to him and he would often find himself observing you as you worked. He was fascinated by you but instead of telling you that he bottled his desire deep inside himself. 

“Do you have more sheets?”

“Yeah in the closet.”

You moved over to the closet, searching for a fresh set of sheets. Will rose from the bed beginning to tug on the soaked sheets. He bundled the fabric in his hands before throwing it into the hamper. You made your way to him, handing him the clean sheets. The two of you worked together making the bed quickly. You pat Will's pillow lightly before moving away from the bed. 

“There. Good as new!”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Silence fell over the room. You started at the bed wondering if anyone had ever had the pleasure of sharing the space with Will. Will watched you deep in thought. He used the opportunity to observe you. Your body was covered by one of his shirts. It was an old piece of clothing, worn down by time but you made it work. An overwhelming need to move closer towards you consumed him all of a sudden. He decided to act on it. He inched himself towards you slowly, not wanting to break your train of thought.

You didn’t notice him move. When you turned to look at him, expecting him to still be far from you, you bumped into him accidentally. The palms of your hands came in contact with his chest. Will looked down at where your body touched his. Before he could do anything you pulled away, creating some distance between you two. You let out a small laugh, stuttering a bit as you spoke.

“I’m gonna get out of your hair. Goodnight.”

You spun on your heels rolling your eyes at yourself. How could such a small amount of contact flustered you so much? Will reached out to you, his hand grabbing onto your arm. You felt the tug on your arm making you stop and turn. 

“Stay.”

“We have work tomorrow. You need to sleep, Will.”

“I won't be able to fall asleep anytime soon. Stay with me. We can talk until we feel tired again.”

You knew you should say no but the way Will was looking at you:  eyes glossy due to lack of sleep, hair tousled due to his abrupt awakening, lips slightly parted as he waited for your response, made it impossible. So you stayed. 

What's the worst that could happen?

Things escalated quickly. You’d gone from talking about work, to intensely making out, to Will begging to eat you out in a matter of minutes.

And you let him.

Your hands curled into Will's curls as his tongue moved over your clit. His hands grab onto your thighs as you squirm beneath him. 

“Will ah i can’t-”

“Come on just one more. You can do it baby.”

He’d said he needed to destress a bit before going to sleep again and what better way to take his mind off things than absolutely ravaging you with his tongue. He’d already made you cum twice but he needed to feel you spill your juices one more time. Just a bit more and he’d be satisfied. He’d said that but it was a lie. From the second he’d felt your lips on his he knew he’d never get enough of the taste of you. He was clawing so harshly at your legs you were sure you’d have scratch marks tomorrow. The thought of having a reminder of him on your body, even if for a little while, exited you. Your hips rose from the bed as you reached your third orgasm. Will kept licking at you until you had to physically push his face off you. He laid his head on your thigh, staring up at you like a puppy. A warm smile spread over Will's face as he watched your chest rise and fall. He would have never imagined he’d find himself in this situation.  You let out a content sigh, finally opening your eyes to look at him. He was looking up at you like a god. It was then that you noticed he was waiting for you to tell him what you wanted. You placed your hand on his face, thumb stroking his cheek as you called out his name. 

“Yes beautiful?”

“Come give me a kiss.”

You felt the weight on your legs dissipate as he rose from the bed. He crawled over your body, arms flexing as he moved. Once he’d gotten face to face with you he leant down slowly to place a kiss on your lips. You held his face, pulling him closer to deepen the kiss. Your legs wound around Wills hips as you made out. He let out a small grunt when you accidentally grazed his hard on. Using all of your body weight you managed to flip your positions around so that you were on top of Will. You grinned down at him, hands splayed against his chest as you rocked your hips slowly.

“My turn.”

You inched your body down his. Will's breath hitched as you gave his hipbone a kiss. His hands gripped at the fresh sheets as you continued to tease him over his boxers. It was only when he let out a breathy “please” that you decided to indulge him. You tugged his boxers down, freeing his dick. You held him in your hand enjoying the weight for a moment before beginning to stroke him. The Will Graham you were currently seeing was nothing like the one you were used to. You’d never seen Will's body so relaxed. Your lips ghosted the tip of his dick causing him to whine.

“You want my mouth Will?”

“Shit baby please.”

He sounded so pretty for you. How could you deny him? As soon as your lips wrapped around his dick Will swore he’d never be able to forget the feeling. You boobed your head, tongue moving over the veins of his dick. Will tugged at your hair roughly, not being able to control his strength due to the pleasure you were giving him. Tears fell from your eyes as you gagged around his dick. He felt the droplets fall on his thighs causing him to raise his head from the people to look at you. A deep moan made its way out of Will as he began to buck his hips. Your grip on his legs tightened as he fucked into your throat. He was getting closer and closer to the edge. You waited eagerly for him to blow his load but then all of a sudden he was tugging you off of him. 

“ Will what’s wro-”

“Sorry baby can’t take it any longer.”

Will roughly tugged you onto him. He positioned himself at your entrance and before you could even process what was going on he sunk into you. You moaned out his name as he filled you up. On instinct you started bouncing on his dick. 

“That’s it baby. Ride me.”

“Jesus Will…you feel so good.”

His hands guided your movements forcing you to move faster and faster as he desperately tried to find release. 

“Fuck i’m gonna cum”

“Give to me Will.”

“Ah shit!”

Wills hips bucked up one last time spilling his load into your. YOu continued grinding on him as he came down from his high. Your hands moved to remove the curls that stuck to his forehead. Will gave you a sleepy smile as you caressed him. You leaned down to give him a kiss. His arms wrapped around your body holding you to him. You closed your eyes hearing the small snores that started to slip out of Will. You nuzzled your body closer to him.

“Good night Will.”

When Will woke up the next morning he found your frame nuzzled into his side, his arm slung over your waist. He placed a kiss on your temple before closing his eyes again. Sleep washed over him quickly. 

He waited from the nightmares to come.

They never did.

[ticktokrobotsnot]

Vapor

This is Part 2

You can read Part 1 here.

Pairing: Carmen Berzatto x fem!reader 

Summary: An accountant helps Carmen organize his not-so-shit-restaurant and gets invited over for family dinner. 

Word Count: 10k

__

The sky was blood orange and the reflection on the store window was mesmerizing. Y/n was supposed to be in the office getting ready for the full day ahead of her but she couldn’t resist slacking off for a bit, it was nice to finally enjoy the restaurant with no one inside. Y/n needed to be here early when a potential vendor came by to give some quotes. Carmen’s initial reaction was to stand his ground and act like some faux bodyguard because he couldn't fathom why some “sick fuck” would want to be alone with a woman in a restaurant at the ass crack of dawn without them having bad intentions—said it wasn't safe at all. Y/n had to inform him that the, “sick fuck” was a woman. And as soon as Carmen heard that, and realized they were going to be talking numbers for a while, he ran off to the farmer's market, wanting no part in that snooze fest. 

Y/n grabbed her laptop and started reviewing the binders she organized. Just as y/n was about to check her phone for any messages, she heard a knock at the door. A pretty blond woman looks at y/n with a bit of confusion. This woman wasn’t expecting to see y/n and y/n wasn't expecting to see this woman. Y/n walked to the door and opened a crack. 

“Who are you?” Y/n questioned. 

“I could ask you the same thing.” The women laughed but y/n wasn’t finding this funny.

“Natalie…” Y/n shook her head like a bouncer sending a teeager away without his fake ID.

“Natalie Berzatto.” She clarified and y/n recalled the name as a co-signer for The Beef, now The Bear. Y/n opened the door a bit more to let her in. 

Y/n gave her name but she didn’t know what else to say but Natalie was already filling the space. 

“Hi! It’s so nice to finally meet you, Carmen won't stop talking about you. You really saved our asses. Especially with the file organizing stuff, I found the old payroll stuff in like a minute, you're a real savant with stuff like that. Carmy is a real sticker for cooking but he is a real shit-”. It didn’t take a genius to figure out Natalie was nervous.

Y/n knew that Natalie was a part of Carmen’s family but she didn’t know how they were connected. One plausible scenario was that she was Micheal’s widowed girlfriend or wife, which would explain why anyone would co-sign the disaster that Micheal had created and promptly left. Y/n wondered why Carmen would be getting so chummy with his widowed sister-in-law, but then again men have done worse. 

Y/n bit the bullet, “How do you know Carmen?”

“I'm his sister… Sugar?” Y/n was starting to feel like a real idiot for not being able to piece these easy deductions together, she was losing her edge because it was to fucking early in the morning.

“Yes, Richie told me that “Sugar” was going to stop by this week. What can I do for you?” Y/n didn’t mention that she thought Sugar was going to be a stripper because of the name. 

“Actually I came to pick some old tax stuff… Micheal’s tax returns.” Y/n guided her to the office. Even if she didn’t look back she knew that Natalie was spying on her binders and laptop laid out on the counter, trying to find out a bit about y/n. 

“So, Carmy tells me that you two used to work together back in New York.”

“Yeah it was only for a few years.”

“Were you close?” Natalie probed. 

“We were…strangers at best.” Y/n chose to leave out the messy parts of her and Carmen’s origins. 

Natalie shook her head in disbelief. "That can't be true, he actually came to my place one day, pretty late. You know why?" Y/n, not knowing the answer, simply shrugged her shoulders. 

"He said he needed to make an important phone call, someone from his old job. He said that he wanted to ask for a bit of help." Natalie continued, her voice tinged with wishfulness "I thought maybe he was finally going to therapy or something." Y/n felt a strange sensation, like she was staring directly into the sun, hope gave Natalie a beautiful glow. 

Natalie's smile softened as she added, "And you know what? He made that phone call right on our porch." Her words carried a touch of warmth. "Well, at least he's reaching out for help. It's a good thing, right?"

“I recommended therapy to him too but I think we would need to put a gun to his head for him to actually go." Natalie let out a humored exhale. 

There was a lull of silence after she handed the tax returns. Y/n could sense that Natalie wanted to talk some more so y/n directed her to the bar stools out front. She checked her phone and saw that her vendor had a family emergency and needed to reschedule. After shooting a quick ok, she directed herself to face Natalie. 

"You can ask me anything. I've got plenty of time to kill." Y/n offered, feeling generous considering the recent kiss shared with Natalie's brother just a week ago.

“I was here a few times but I never had a chance to meet you?”

“I was probably apartment hunting.” Natalie looked like she was debating asking her next question.   

“What did you think of Carmen when you guys were back in New York?”

“He was like every other chef.”

“Nothing else? No pulling force?”

“No pulling force.”

“You moved state lines for him and you're saying there was no pulling force?”

“He asked me for help and I gave him some.” 

“You chose to stay. There had to be a pull.”

“The restaurant spoke to my soul, I had to stay.” Y/n was bluffing. 

“Bullshit, there was a pull.” Natalie said with a self fulfilled smirk like she had won a point in their imaginary game.

Natalie continued, “You know, he won a Michelin star. A man who cooks…is not too bad.”

“I don’t eat gourmet food. It’s pretentious.” Y/n didn’t want to make too much out of the kiss and make Carmen panic.

“I'm sure he can make something you will like.” 

“I have yet to eat something of his that would warrant him having a Michelin star.”

“You don’t like his cooking?”

“I don’t like anyone’s cooking.” Natalie couldn’t come up with something else. Point to y/n. A smile spread across y/n’s face and Natalie was relieved to realize that y/n wasn’t being serious. 

“What do you like doing?” Natalie probed. 

“I spend most of my time working here but I also read.” 

“Why did you leave New York?” Natalie blurted out.

“I don’t like working with other people, my boss was all over me. I thought Chicago would be a nice change of pace.” 

Y/n saw Natalie unlock her phone to respond to a text from someone named Pete, who had a pink heart near his name. Y/n knew that memorizing people’s passwords was an invasion of their privacy but it was fun to be a bit nosy. 

Y/n was also tired of getting the third-degree, she was hoping for a few fun questions asking if she ever murdered anyone or if she ever was contacted to be a part of a bank heist. She would be lying if she wasn’t a bit afraid that whatever she said would be relayed to Carmen so she didn’t want to say anything too damning. 

“You read romance?” Y/n saw the book peeking out of Natalie’s bag, it was one that she had read before. 

“Yeah, they’re my guilty pleasure.”

“Mine too. I liked that one.” Y/n pointed at the book peaking out.

“I hate it, it's filled with miscommunication. I’m only finishing it to justify the 12 dollars I spent.” Natalie said with a fake pout. 

“I love miscommunication because I suck at talking to people too. Much better than the one I just finished.”

“What killed your book?”

“Third-act break up.” Natalie nodded her head, it seems like they agreed. 

Y/n couldn't help but feel relieved; while the nature of Y/n's relationship with Carmen remained uncertain, it was evident that Natalie would become a more integral part of the restaurant. Carmen's recent discovery of three hundred thousand dollars hidden in tomato cans had sparked ambitious plans for renovating the place. Even if she ended up being nothing serious with Carmen, she needed to secure a stable support who wouldn’t completely hate her if shit hit the fan. 

They continued to talk about a few books that they had read, a few so trashy that they had to hide their faces in embarrassment from each other when reading the summary out loud. 

The door chimed and both women looked over to Carmen who was holding a few bags of produce and baked goods. Y/n went over and plucked the receipts for the top of one of the bags, she didn’t bother helping Carmen because he wouldn’t have let her help anyways. Carmen was gracious enough to put all the receipts together so she wasn’t digging to find them, she kept a record of them to write them off as a business deduction. 

“Nat, you’re here early?” Carmen spared a glance before opening a box of croissants to share and then disappearing to the kitchen to put everything away. 

“Yeah I had to pick something up, y/n was so kind to help me so early in the morning. Isn’t she just the best?” 

“Yeah…How did it go with the vendor?” Carmen mindlessly mumbled while busying himself with a notebook of recipe ideas. 

“Rescheduled.” Y/n didn’t look up, engrossed in cataloging some expensive mushrooms for record keeping. $268.43 for some mushrooms was honestly so ridiculous y/n needed to squint to see if she was seeing this right. 

“I need to return the favor.” Natalie started.

“It was just a few folders, you really don’t-”

“Why don’t you join us for dinner on friday?” Y/n felt like she was performing front and center.

“I couldn’t-.” 

“Please, Pete never wants to talk to me about…” Natalie was raising her eyebrows in the most unsubtle way possible so she didn’t expose y/n's softer side and her penchant for reading romance novels. Y/n couldn’t help but hide her face in embarrassment, “Yeah…fine. Just tell me what time.”

Observing the exchange, Carmen couldn't help but wonder if this was how dogs felt when humans engaged in their own incomprehensible conversations.

Y/n was starting to feel like she was edging closer and closer to Carmen’s limit. Kissing in the back alley of a restaurant and on the car ride to and from work was very different from being invited to his sister’s house for dinner. It carried a weight of intimacy, commitment, and solidity that made Y/n slightly uneasy, wondering if this was too much for Carmen. She waited for the other shoe to drop, Carmen would subtly show his discontent by telling Natalie that she shouldn’t force y/n to go to that dinner, which was just an excuse to create some distance. Y/n was surprised when Carmen asked what type of desert he should bring instead. 

Y/n kept her cool and excused herself to go to the office so she could get back to work. 

Carmen and Natalie moved to the kitchen where Carmen would experiment for a bit. Natalie sat on a stool next to Carmen who started washing produce. 

“She is very smart.” Natalie whispered. She took a glance at the closed office door.

“Yeah. Great with the books.” Carmen peeled and diced some garlic. 

“Nice too.”

“She is very nice.” Carmen started cutting some nepitella. The additional “very” caused some alarm bells to ring in Natalie’s head. She hid her smirk. 

“Everything about her is nice,” Natalie made sure to pay close attention to Carmen’s face, “Nice personality, nice face-” Carmen took a worried glance at the office door and then looked up at Natalie with wide eyes.

“Why, why, what are you-?” He was flustered. 

“I’m just sharing my observations. You don’t think she has a nice face-?”

“This is a business, we try to keep professional.” Carmen hid his fumble with fake professionality, unfortunately Natalie saw right through it. 

“Try?” Natalie teased. Carmen looked away to pretend to look for some dried porcini. He felt like an idiot. He understood why people used to see him as an easy target when he was younger, he basically showed everyone his buttons, and asked them to get pushed. Carmen continued to chop in silence. 

“I'm sorry, I just got a bit excited. I won't push.” Natalie gave her brother the benefit of the doubt, she always thought he would never get into a serious relationship but he liked y/n and y/n seemed like the serious girlfriend type. Natalie couldn’t help but nudge Carmen in the right direction. 

Carmen chopped in silence for a few minutes, debating if he should tell Natalie about the kiss. In his mind, he didn’t know if it was too soon for him to introduce his girlfriend to his family. Calling y/n his girlfriend felt unreal, past him wouldn’t believe it even if he saw it.  

He handed his notebook to Natalie so she could read measurements to him, he wanted her here for just a bit longer till he gained the courage to tell her about y/n. 

Tagliatelle with porcini mushrooms was the first test item of the morning, and he had to soak the dried porcini for 30 minutes, he was bummed that the market didn't have the fresh kind but he knew he would get the real shit when y/n got a hold of that vendor. He looked up at Natalie and tilted his head to indicate that they should leave. Carmen avoided the alley because he knew that y/n would look there first and he didn’t want her to overhear anything. They walked over to a nearby supermarket and started roaming the aisles. It was nearly empty because it was six in the morning. 

“I did something…and I need you to not…just listen and don’t make it a big deal.”

“I got it, Carmy.” 

“A while ago, I…” Carmen looked at all the different types of instant noodles they had on display. “So, we were in deep shit with these pre-orders and I was a mess and y/n and I were talking after…” Carmen moved over to the boxed pasta, he didn't intend to buy anything but he did read the nutritional facts.

“I umm, asked her to…” Jesus, Carmen wondered, why he didn’t make more friends so he didn’t have to talk to his older sister about something like this. Richie didn’t seem capable of giving any advice that wasn’t, “Just Do It”.

 “We ki…” Natalie kept her face hard but the second that Carmen turned around to look at a box of elbow pasta, she couldn't help herself but let out a small, barely audible squeal of delight. Her eyes widened, and a grin threatened to break through her determined facade. Natalie quickly covered her mouth with her hand, trying to contain her elation, making sure not to let Carmen catch a glimpse. She stifled her excitement with every fiber of her being, preserving the illusion of calmness for when Carmen turned back around, none the wiser.

“It’s been a while, and we k…” Carmen didn’t know how he was supposed to maturely ask for advice when he couldn’t even say a kiss in front of his sister while cringing. Carmen couldn’t do this, it was too open, too vulnerable. 

Nat cut him some slack and started asking questions instead, “Was it a one time thing?” Carmen subtly shook his head no. Her lips parted as she squeezed a jar of Pego to contain herself. 

“Do you regret it?” Carmen didn’t respond but that didn’t mean no, that ment that she was getting closer to the root of the problem.

“Do you think she’s going to regret it?” Carmen’s shoulder’s raised slightly, bingo. 

“Why don’t I gauge how she is feeling at dinner.” Nat knew he was about to run away from her for exposing too much and she had to give him an incentive to not follow his instincts. 

She continued, “We talked earlier, she said she hates your cooking.” Carmen’s head snapped up, Nat knew that y/n was just joking but it was still a bit funny to mess with Carmen. 

The look of shock transported her back to when she was eight sitting next to Carmy and watching Micheal convince him to finish a glass of milk or else he would lose all of his teeth to a calcium deficiency. This wasn’t the time to reminisce but it made her heart warm knowing that even after going through so much, there was still a part of young Carmy that persevered. She was feeling the burning in the back of her eyes, her hormones were making her sentimental. 

“Yeah she said that your food fucking blows.” Carmen caught on and let out a small laugh.

They both roamed in the aisle moving on to juices. Sugar free, diet, pineapple, orange. Carmen’s eyebrows raised when he saw the price of orange juice before putting it down and deciding to just make his own. 

Carmen started, “She isn’t the type of person who changes her mind easily,” but if she can make that shift to see him in a good light, maybe she'll stick around and eventually see the real Carmen—a pathetic, insecure loser. All he did was make a promise to her but he knew it meant nothing without actions, and he was unsure if he could control his anger or keep his obsessiveness in check when something especially difficult happened. If another shit storm made its rounds in the kitchen, would he really be able to be the bigger person? Carmen doubted it. 

Carmen just ripped off the bandaid, “I don’t know how to…I want her to not hate me. I know I'm going to..” Carmen waited till a child next to them moved to the other end of teh aisle towards his dad, “..fuck it up, but I dont want that to happen.” 

“What makes you think she is going to hate you?”

“When we were talking…she told me that I should have done better. And that I…needed to be “stable”, but I don’t know how to be that for myself, let alone someone else.”

“She isn’t asking you to do it for her, she wants you to do it for yourself.” Natalie offered. 

“Its like having to solve a word search to answer a stupid fucking puzzle. I don’t…” Carmen sighed in defeat. Nat knew that he was strong and it was impossible for her to fix this for him but that still made her palms itch seeing him struggle like this. She racked her brain, desperately seeking any glimmer of a solution that could offer him even a shred of relief. 

They both walked out the market towards the restaurant. “It's really hard…and it's not that I don’t want to, it just feels impossible.” Carmen muttered, he was close to giving up. 

A burning sensation welled up in the back of Natalie's throat, and she instinctively placed her hand on Carmen's shoulder as a gesture of support and to her surprise Carmen looked at her, saw her glassy eyes and hugged her. The shock knocked a few tears from her eyes.. 

Carmy was not a selfish person but Nat noticed that he was becoming a bit more aware that he takes up much more space then he originally thought he did. He now knew that his presence was big enough to be able to tear people down but was also big enough to offer meaningful support. He had come to understand his own significance, and this realization struck Natalie like a tidal wave, causing her to burst into uncontrollable sobs. 

“Does crying mean I'm fucked, Sugar?” Carmen asked, his voice tinged with humor and uncertainty, as he gently rubbed Natalie's back for comfort. Nat shook her head no.

“You'll be okay. You always are.” Nat wiped her face before continuing to walk back to the restaurant. 

Carmen snuck a few glances to see what was making his sister a sobbing mess, she wasn’t the type to break down like that, “Are you good?” Natalie nodded her head.

“Everything good at home?” It felt strange to say the word home, even after visiting multiple countries and living in many different apartments, Carmen couldn’t really call any place home. Home was supposed to be a sanctuary of warmth, Carmen's closest experience to that feeling was back in his family house—a place where the warmth was scalding and suffocating. Where it was a constant waiting game, anticipating the intense heat to escalate and cause everything, and everyone, to boil over. 

Carmen was acutely aware that he would never have a home quite like Sugar's. He couldn't help but wonder if he had what it took to be like Pete for someone else—always helpful, kind, and perhaps a little too accommodating. He questioned whether he had the capacity to fulfill that role and maintain his own sense of self. Granted, what about his “self” was worth preserving?

Natalie nodded her head but Carmen wasn’t convinced. “It's just a lot, you know. Seeing the place getting renovated. I used to hate that place, but..” She sighed, “...I picked up Micheal’s tax returns, I didn’t even need them for anything…I just wanted to see them to know what he was going through towards the…'' end. She didn’t need to finish for Carmen to know what she was talking about. They were in front of the restaurant and Carmen gave her a side hug and against his better judgment he tried his hand in verbal reassurance so he could be there for her, fully. 

“I think he tried his best to make everything look fine, and it’s nice to know that he was at least able to pretend till the...end.” Sugar looked up at him and didn’t comment on his successful attempt to be her support, not wanting to scare him. 

They wordlessly walked in the restaurant and Carmen finished up his dish. He made enough for one plate because he was expecting to have to remake it a few times. He grabbed a small plate and served a separate plate for y/n before knocking on her door. She looked up at him, not hearing him and gave him a “hmm” which echoed in his chest. She sat with them in the kitchen, taking her laptop with her. They all took the first bite together. Carmen watched both women’s reactions to gauge their uncensored reactions. Natalie’s eyebrows raised and she gave him a nod of approval. 

Y/n took a bite and looked up from her plate so see Carmen staring at her. “Why are you staring?”

“Do you not like it?” 

“It’s good.” Y/n put her fork down and propped up her head on her hand. 

“But, you didn’t-”

“I’m not really a foodie, so food is never like…” Y/n made an explosion sound and flicked her hands open, “Good, is the best you going to get out of me.” Natalie wondered how a chef and an anti-gourmet foodie were going to work. 

“Is all food just ”good”?” Y/n looked up and tried to think of food that was better than good.

“I like mom's cooking.” 

“What is her food like?”

“Intense…subtly in food doesn’t mean anything to me because I don’t taste the difference.” Carmen was waiting for more for y/n.

“I ate a lot of spicy, sour and bitter food growing up. My mom didn’t think that kids should eat different things than everyone else, so I guess pasta and mushrooms will always be just “good”.” Y/n felt like she was just shitting all over his profession but he asked for her opinion so he couldn’t get offended now. 

Carmen nodded his head before walking away. Y/n pierced her lips and looked over to Natalie wondering if she hurt Carmen’s feelings. Natalie looked just as bewildered. Just as y/n was about to find Carmen, he came out with a few more ingredients.

“What are you making?” 

“Something you will like.” 

“I liked what you made-” 

“Good is not enough.” 

“Come on, Carmen, it's something that everyone will like, it’s going to kill opening day.”

“But you have to like it.” Y/n sighed before indicating that he should continue. 

“You won’t be able to serve the food I like to eat, it would be considered a biological weapon.” Y/n was warning him but Carmen thought she was teasing him. He would learn to listen to her warning in the future. He put the porcini mushrooms to the side before getting started on some penne all’arrabbiata. 

Y/n laughed at him knowing that he wouldn’t have the courage to spice up a dish to her standard before grabbing her laptop so she could get some work done and also talk to Natalie about contractors. 

While Carmen chopped and stirred, y/n subtly glanced up at his flexing back and strong arms. She thought she was hiding it well but when she went to check if Natalie noticed she saw that Natalie was already watching her. Natalie snickered as y/n hid her face behind her laptop to hide her embarrassment. Carmen turned around to see what was so funny but was just met with the view of both of them with their faces hiding behind their hands. 

Y/n felt someone pass behind her and knew it was Sydney without having to look up. “Hey guys, what are we making?” She took a bite out of the pasta, which was slightly cooled but she still nodded her head. 

“It’s fire, chef. It would be great if it was hot, I want to remake it to see what it was supposed to taste like.”

Y/n couldn’t say that she completely forgave Sydney but y/n did respect that she went to Richie to give some type of apology after a while. Y/n could accept that the two of them wouldn’t be best friends, they just needed to be able to work together. 

Y/n went to Carmen’s locker before pulling out a few Tums for everyone, it looks like today was going to be pasta day because of her and she didn’t want to send everyone home with a stomach ache.

Carmen continued with his pasta, and served it in front of y/n. All the women took a bite,

“It’s got a kick to it.” Natalie said while reaching for a food container filled with water while wiping sweat from her brow. Sydney gave Carmen a, “This is fire, chef.” Y/n couldn't help but cringe inwardly at the comment because she knew she couldn't quite match their shared vernacular and the ease with which they expressed themselves with food. What private passion did y/n and Carmen share?

Carmen stared y/n down as she took a bite.

“It’s good.” Carmen waited for her to elaborate. “It’s too subtle.” 

Carmen smirked, “Yeah, next time I'll just make you a ball of fire for you to enjoy.” Y/n gave him a shit eating grin, it was just too fun not to mess with him, and when she saw him smile back she felt a bit of imaginary nostalgia, this was what she longed for back in New York. 

The restaurant was still closed for renovations and after a while a few other crew members came by to do some demo. Y/n was stuck on hold with the inspector's office when she was approached by Natalie, “I’ve got a doctor’s appointment so I've got to go, I’ll see you on Friday at eight.” 

The rest of the week flew by because they were on a very strict time crunch to open in a few months. Y/n wasn’t very worried but she could feel the nerves from everyone else and she knew it would be in bad taste to tell them to toughen up, so she let them be grown ups and deal with their own anxieties. 

On Friday, y/n left early to get ready for dinner, she opened an old moving box and pulled out a dress that she wore to an old work function. It was very tasteful because it was freezing outside. Y/n grabbed her gifts before running into Carmen’s car. Y/n took one look at Carmen and had to do a double take to make sure that she went into the right person’s car. Carmen’s hair was lighty slicked back, probably with pomade, and he was wearing a deep blue sweater with a white collar. 

“I didn’t know you had clothes other than aprons and Dickies.”

“You look..” Carmen marveled at the way her eyes sparkled with an inner radiance, drawing him in like a moth to a flame. He knew he wasn’t able to get the full picture yet because they were in a dark car but he could only imagine what she would do to him when they went to the well lit house. “..great.” Carmen wanted to punch himself for being so unoriginal but he couldn’t focus on anything. 

“Thank you, you look good too. Blue is definitely your color..” Carmen’s fingers loosened around the steering wheel, compliments had always made him uneasy; he spent the majority of his life trying to make himself as small as possible and now he was pushed into the spotlight and he wondered if he even liked it?

“Carmen, can you look at me for a second?” And when he swiveled his head towards y/n, she squished his face lighty before giving his puckered lips a soft kiss. Just as she was about to lean back into her seat, Carmen, unable to resist, slipped his hand beneath her hair, grasping the back of her neck and drawing her in for a deeper, more passionate second kiss. 

Yeah, he liked it.

“We are going to be late.” Y/n whispered before giving him one last peck. Carmen, still in a daze, fiddled with the radio so he could get his head straight. The ride to his sister’s house was quiet barring the soft jazz. Y/n was very nervous, they never had that conversation that said that they were official and for all she knew she was just a friend that Carmen kissed from time to time. She resisted the urge to ask right now because she was scared to find out that they were nothing more. She would savor the few minutes before she was inevitably introduced as a friend, or worse a co-worker. 

They pulled into Natalie’s driveway and got out of the car, y/n grabbed the bouquet of flowers and a bottle of wine and they rang the doorbell. 

"Why are you holding the tray like that?" Y/n asked, noticing how Carmen clung to it like a shield. Before she could receive a response, Natalie opened the door with a warm greeting, inviting them inside. Y/n handed over the gifts, but Carmen still clung onto his belongings. Just then, Peter descended the stairs, seemingly about to approach Carmen for a hug before his gaze landed on Carmen's protective tray. He hesitated and stepped back, realizing it was acting as a barrier. Y/n stifled a laugh, biting her cheek to prevent herself from laughing at Carmen’s immaturity.

Carmen greeted, “Pete.” Y/n could feel the dislike and she felt bad for Pete because he seemed nice.

“Carmen, it’s good to see you, man.”

“This is my girlfriend, y/n.” A sense of numbness overwhelmed her. It was like when people get run over by a semi and say that they don’t feel anything. Y/n extended her hand to shake Pete's, and she followed him into the living room. 

Carmen went into the kitchen to help Natalie and y/n made pleasant conversation with Pete, he seemed a bit soft but she could understand why Natalie might want someone like him. Y/n pretended to be interested when he showed her his Cubs memorabilia, she initially thought the Cubs were a fictional sports team made by the New Girl writers. 

Y/n and Pete walked over to the kitchen and asked if they needed any help. Pete looked like he wanted to actually be helpful but y/n had her fingers crossed hoping she didn’t have to do any cooking. It was weird to see Carmen let someone else take the lead while he watched. Even with Sydney, he still watched over everything like a hawk, not because he didn’t trust her, it's just because he wouldn’t let her fail. 

Y/n watched as everyone spoke and she wondered where she fit in. Natalie and Carmen were obviously close and Pete was doing his best to get close to Carmen, trying to bridge the obvious gap between them. Y/n had to stop herself from telling Carmen to either be nicer or for Pete to drop it.

Other than being Carmen’s new “girlfriend” and sharing small talk, what else was there for her to talk about? Y/n didn’t know them well but she could tell there was a lot of subtext between the three of them that added weight to their interactions that she wasn’t privy to yet. She was a flame trying to suck in any bubble of oxygen so she could ignite, she needed more information before she could actually join them.

 It felt like she was reading Dune for the first time, being dropped in the middle of an already moving plot and she was scrambling to play catch up. Carmen had a lot of triggers and she wondered if Natalie was the same. Even if they acted completely differently, y/n could tell that they were sidestepping something, like they were avoiding talking about a gaping bullet wound, and if siblings were acting like that it means that it's a problem with the parents. Despite the fact that they were in the kitchen, the three of them weren’t talking about the food. Y/n made a mental checklist of a few rules; 1. Don’t bring up parents 2. Don't mention food because it's a trigger 3. Pay attention to Natalie because she was not as good at hiding her feelings as Carmen. 

Dinner was served and they all took a seat, y/n took slow sips of wine and saw that Natalie’s wine was slightly darker than hers. Y/n was sitting across Natalie so she recognized the smell too, apple. She was drinking sparkling apple cider. Y/n hid her smirk by talking another sip, she would be a spy or something because she was killing it in the recon department. 

Dinner was starting to feel stiff, y/n took a deep breath and turned to Natalie, “Your cooking is to die for.” Natalie tucked in her lips but couldn’t help but hide her smile, y/n never told Carmen anything like that, barring the first day she got to Chicago, it was a petty way of getting back at him for blindsiding her by calling her his girlfriend. 

“Thanks, It's a family recipe.” Y/n wanted to stab herself with the fork, she just broke rule one and two. Just as y/n was about to make some asinine comment to change topics, Carmen did it for her.

“Can you pass me the bread, Sugar?” Y/n found her opening.

“Sugar, that’s a nice nickname, what’s the story?” 

Natalie paused and y/n had a feeling she fucked up, “We were having this Chrismas family thing and I added a cup of sugar into the gravy instead of salt. The name just stuck.” Y/n definitely fucked up, she was breaking rules left and right. Y/n scrabbled to put herself in the same level as Natalie.

“I’ve been there. My parents were having a few co-worker over for lunch and they brought a box of these expensive mangos and I was told to make some smoothies because it was boiling that day. I filled up the sugar container with salt without noticing and made them smoothies with a ton of salt.” Y/n saw that all eyes were on her and she didn’t allow herself to be nervous because she was trying to get a deeper point across.

Y/n continued, “I have never heard that many people gag all at once.” Their faces broke into a smile.

“What did your mom say?” Bingo, looks like the taboo parent could be narrowed down to their mother. 

“She didn’t say anything bad, she and her co-workers just laughed. I mean I was a kid and we all make mistakes. I ended up making lemonade instead.”

Natalie’s eyes lit up,“It’s a shame that all those mangos went to waste.” Natalie joked. 

“Waste?” Y/n had a fake offense, “I drank the rest to prove that it wasn’t that bad.”

“Was it that bad?” Pete asked.

“My blood pressure was through the roof. It was the first time I ever got a headache.” 

The rest of dinner was a bit more relaxed, y/n was expecting Carmen to talk a bit more because these were his people but it looked like she would have to do the talking for the both of them. They finished up dinner and y/n got up to help them clean up. It was y/n and Carmen alone in the kitchen while Natalie went upstairs to check on something, aka she needed some rest and Pete went to check up on her. 

As Carmen washed the dishes, Y/n stood by, towel in hand, drying them. The domestic scene felt comfortable, yet she couldn't determine if she truly enjoyed this newfound domesticity. She wondered if in Carmen’s eyes she was merely playing the role of the perfect partner – someone who could effortlessly navigate his family dynamics, fix his business, and be his own manic pixie dream girl. 

A selfish thought crossed Y/n's mind. What was she truly gaining from this relationship? She had been too afraid to make a move with Carmen after the kiss, fearing that one misstep could lead her to being shut out completely. She hesitated to voice her preferences about his food, to ask about the nature of their relationship, or to discuss their future plans if this relationship fell through. Y/n wasn't one to dwell in discomfort, except for her previous job, and she felt frustrated that she had to jump through so many hoops just to ensure that Carmen wouldn't leave.

They finished the dishes and y/n could tell that Carmen wanted to check on Natalie but he didn’t want to leave y/n alone. Y/n being a supportive girlfriend, practically pushed him up the steps before walking out the front door and leaning on the porch. Y/n grabbed her jacket and walked out. She underestimated the frigid Chicago air which felt like a sharp slap to her face, serving as a wake-up call. It reminded her that the warm and fuzzy feeling she had been battling within herself was merely fleeting, and that the reality of the world could be much harsher and more painful. 

Y/n couldn’t help but wonder why Carmen was even bothering with her, they had nothing in common but the restaurant. Work was everything for him and Sydney, their shared connection always pulled them together despite both of their volatile personalities. What pulled y/n and Carmen together? They both worked in the restaurant but Carmen didn’t have a passion for running said restaurant, it was a mere obligation that y/n took from him. If she stopped working there, what else did they have in common? 

Y/n came to the daunting realization that Carmen picked Sydney because he saw potential in her, a chance to let both him and her grow. However, he didn’t pick y/n because he saw something deeper in her, it was an act of embarrassed desperation. 

Was she just a means to help Carmen get his shit together? The restaurant meant a lot to Micheal and after he died Carmen stopped seeing the restaurant as something that was out of his reach but as something to connect him to his brother, a small thread connecting the estranged brothers. Y/n was there to hold up the connection in the vaguest of ways, she kept the restaurant afloat so Carmen could come to terms with Micheals’s legacy, good and bad.

She was lost in thought when she heard the door close, she turned her head to see Carmen was already lighting a cigarette. It was difficult for her to be objective when Carmen locked eyes with her with such intensity. Y/n ripped her eyes from him and faced forward looking at the neighbor's yard, they had nice shrubs. 

“I thought you left.” Carmen started as he leaned on the railing with y/n. He looked forward to see what was so interesting that y/n couldn’t look him in the face, it was just some trees.

“I needed some air.”

“You could catch a cold.” 

“I don’t get sick, sick is a mindset.” Y/n was obviously joking. 

She lowered her head so that she could feel the cold metal on her forehead, maybe a different type of pain would make this conversation easier. Her forehead landed on something warm, the back of Carmen’s hand. She turned her head to its side but remained connected to Carmen’s hand. The warmth radiating on her cheek was making her stomach do backflips. Even if she knew she shouldn’t be indulging like this she couldn’t help it. He felt too good and y/n was getting more and more greedy. 

“Hey, Carmen?” Carmen was still staring at y/n. “What do we have in common?” He looked taken aback.

“We like each other…” He was starting to feel the slow slitter of nausea because he knew the other shoe was about to drop.

“If we don’t have much in common, what do we talk about?” 

“We can talk about whatever we like. It’s nice to…be with someone who isn't wrapped up in the same things as me.” Carmen expressed a genuine warmth in his voice. Carmen wanted to say that she made him feel like the roof wasn’t going to collapse on him and that the small things weren’t going to destroy him but it felt selfish to describe how much he cared for her based on how she made him feel and not on facts about her. 

“I don’t care about fancy food.” Y/n blurted out.

Carmen chuckled, “You know about the vendors, where the supplies are sourced, how much they cost, and a bunch of other stuff. You do care, just in a different way than I do.”

“Is that a good thing?”

“It gives me perspective. It’s very realistic and grounded.” Y/n knew he was calling her realistic and grounded. 

“I like hearing you talk about my food.” Carmen offered.

“Even if it’s just “good”?”

“Especially if it's just "good". That means you're telling me the truth.” Carmen recalled a ninth grade world history lesson about the Rosetta Stone, an artifact written in three different languages and made it possible to translate some ancient language. Though he hadn't fully paid attention during the lesson, Carmen now saw the parallel. If Y/n had the courage to express her opinions on his food, it meant she was being honest with him about everything else. 

Y/n cracked a smile before covering her mouth and started laughing. It was a jarring sound, Carmen couldn’t pinpoint what the laugh was meant to convey but he knew it wasn’t good. 

“What?” Carmen asked, Y/n rubbed her face with her cold hands. 

“You said that you were scared of me a while back but now…” Y/n's laughter softened into a smaller chuckle, conveying a mix of amusement and irony.

“I’m scared of you.” The weight was lifted off her shoulders and slammed down on Carmen's. Y/n wondered if this is how the rest of their relationship was going to be; one person transferring their hurt to the other till the weight became too much to bear. 

"It's... I want to bring so many things up to you but..." Y/n wondered if this counted as an accusation. "..you’re so flighty. I don't know what to say that won't make you..." Y/n struggled to find a word that didn't feel so definitive, but the only word that felt honest was, "...leave."

The porch fell into an uneasy silence, both of them grappling with the weight of Y/n's vulnerability.

"I...I didn't realize..." Carmen stammered, his voice betraying his inner turmoil. "I would never just... leave." They both stared in silence, they knew that wasn’t true. Y/n lifted her head leaving the warmth behind, she knew this wouldn’t work if he made false promises. And against everything telling her to just accept his promise as law and ignore any doubts, she couldn’t fool herself like that. 

“That’s such bullshit.” Y/n lighty giggled. It felt as though a shark had promised to stop swimming—it was ingrained in their nature. In that lighthearted moment, a mischievous thought crossed Y/n's mind: What would happen if Carmen actually stopped running away? Would he cease to exist, like a fish in space? 

Her playful musings, though immature, offered a brief respite from the weight of their conversation. It was a temporary escape, a way to diffuse the tension. Y/n noticed that she brought all this shit up to comfort herself but she was giggling to make him feel safe. Even when she knew she shouldn’t, she couldn't help but try to make him feel better. 

As the laughter subsided, Y/n met Carmen's eyes, she forced herself to ignore the emotions he was conveying and instead tried to match his eyes with things she had seen in the past. If this ended poorly, she would miss his eyes the most and she wanted to know what else could match in intensity in case she never got to see him like this ever again, nothing came to mind.

Carmen felt like he was backed into a corner, he couldn’t promise her anything without her, justifiably, doubting him. 

"I don't want to leave you," Carmen offered, his voice carrying a mixture of sincerity and vulnerability. It was the most honest response he could offer at that moment. He couldn't guarantee that he wouldn't feel the urge to run, to escape when things got tough, but he had a genuine desire to stay. 

Y/n's eyes met Carmen's, her expression softened. She knew it wasn't a perfect answer, but it was a step forward. It was enough to know that he acknowledged his own complexities and still chose to be present with her.

They stood in the quiet watching neighbors turn off their living room lights and go upstairs. She wanted to test out whether, “They could talk about whatever they wanted too.” 

“What do you think they’re doing?” Y/n asked, Carmen parted his lips and turned his face to look at y/n so see if she was serious, she was.

“I think they go to bed and she has this super long night time routine and he is already asleep by the time she gets to bed. You?” Y/n knew that if they ever slept over at each other’s place, that’s exactly what would happen between them. 

“She probably got home from a shit day and she starts reading an easy romance book…Do you read any books?”

“They are mostly cooking stuff.” He took a drag from his cigarette.

“You read cookbooks for entertainment?”

“Sometimes, it's a part of the craft.” Carmen realized how fucking pretentious he sounded and was a bit ashamed but seeing y/n refrain from teasing him by bitting her lips made him not want to crawl into a hole and die of shame, her smile was addicting. “…but there is a lot of history and science too. '' Carmen knew he sucked at conversation but he would do anything to keep talking. 

“What was your last book?” 

Y/n and Carmen kept talking till they lost track of time and eventually when they had reached a comfortable lull, y/n could confidently say that they were in fact capable of holding a conversation about mundane shit. 

Against every fiber of her being telling her to end their conversation like this, she couldn’t help but ask, “What happens…if this ends?” Y/n didn’t know if she was supposed to use “if” or “when”; one was cautious, the other was a prophecy. 

Carmen didn’t look back at her, instead giving her, “You’ll still have a job…I’m not a dick…all the time.” Y/n lips curved upwards. 

“Will you be able to work with someone you’ve been in a relationship with?” 

“Yes.” Carmen wondered if the answer could ever be anything other than yes. 

Y/n knew that if this ended badly she would be allowed to stick around so that Carmen would have an excuse to throw himself at his work. She would be the catalyst to merge him from an individual to a vague reflection of Micheal’s legacy. 

Whether or not Carmen knew it, Micheal was a huge influence in his life and just like Micheal began to isolate himself towards the end, Carmen would do the same if they drifted apart. It was his inherent weakness and a relationship gone sour that would make it difficult for him to break the cycle that Micheal had started. 

“I won’t stay if it hurts you, Carmen.”

“I would want you to stay, y/n.”

“There is no trophy that comes with going through unnecessary shit.”

“I know, I would still need you.” Carmen hesitated but eventually placed his hand top on y/n's. 

“Because I can do the books?” Y/n rolled her eyes jokingly. 

“No…you do more than that. You are…” Carmen read books with a shit ton of adjectives, they had to be descriptive to describe food through text. Despite that, he was at a loss for words to describe her.

"You are..." he began again, this time his voice was a little gentler than before. He took a deep breath, hoping that he could find those words that would express everything he felt.

"You are very important to me,". His voice was soft like he was realizing this for the first time. 

The second time was meant for y/n, "You are very important to me."  I love you, y/n. 

Y/n locked eyes with Carmen for a moment. 

"You are important to me too." I love you, Carmen.

Neither of them had the courage to say that to each other, wondering if they were the only one’s feeling like this. 

They both had jackets on but y/n’s hands were freezing and she could feel Carmen’s hand was also ice cold. She knew that they had both reached their limits but y/n couldn’t help but relish in the cold for a bit longer. 

For y/n, the biting cold was always a catalyst for clarity, stripping away the unnecessary and forcing y/n to distill her focus onto the few things that mattered. Amidst the frost, she found solace in the simplicity. It was within this chilling environment that she discovered a clear chance to confront her inner turmoil head-on and confront the world. 

Carmen had always been drawn to the intense heat. It was as if the scorching temperatures matched the fire that burned within him, igniting his passion and driving him forward but leaving him with nothing to look back on. Extreme heat was his poison of choice, his way of confronting the world. 

Carmen’s heat was turning her mind into a messy slurry of slush. Y/n had to force herself to focus despite the fact that Carmen’s hand was providing her with a sliver of intoxicating  warmth.

“You didn’t ask me to be your girlfriend.” Carmen’s head shot up aback by y/n's words. He was excited to introduce her to his family, and he hadn't thought to ask her permission first. He tried to explain himself, his words coming out in a rush.

"I didn't mean to assume anything. I just thought that since we've been seeing each other for a while now, it was... " He took a moment to catch his breath, trying to gather his thoughts.

“I think you should try asking first.” Carmen stared at y/n not knowing if this was a trap to get rejected twice. He opted for silence.

“Carmen, ask me if I want to be your girlfriend?” Carmen didn't want to say the wrong thing, not when it was so important, for someone so important. Carmen trusted y/n so he stubbed his cigarette on the ashtray before taking a deep breath and asking, “Will you be my girlfriend, y/n.” 

Y/n wrapped her freezing hands around his neck accidentally grazing her finger on his neck making him shiver. She leaned in against his lip and even though they had kissed before this, Carmen felt like he couldn’t think. Y/n lips barely touching Carmen’s before whispering a soft, “Yes, Carmy.” 

Carmen closed the small gap between their lips. And y/n felt a gentle heat seep through the folds of her head making it difficult to focus on her freezing fingers, or her numb toes, or her goosebump riddled legs, or her shivering arms. Y/n felt Carmen pull her closer and even though they were as close as physically possible, it wasn’t enough. Carmen’s lips left y/n’s before trailing down the column of her neck, y/n could feel the blossoming of heat radiate from his lips. Y/n’s hands sank down to Carmen’s waist and slowly drifted up his shirt. The cold sent shivers down his spine as y/n’s hands moved at a glacial pace. 

Just as Carmen reached the collar of her jacket he looked up at her and y/n had to resist every irrational and reckless part of her that told her to continue. The realization that they were on Carmen’s sister’s porch made y/n look around to ground herself. She landed on a black box right near the door before looking back to Carmen with her mouth agape and her eyes wide open. 

“What?” Carmen questioned with furrowed eyebrows.

“We are on your sister's porch.” Y/n said with a thousand yard stare and a distant mutter.

“I’m not a fucking animal, obviously we aren’t going to do this here.” Y/n softly grasped Carmen’s face before turning towards the black box, a doorbell camera. 

“Jesus…fuck.” They both looked at each other before y/n scrambled inside with Carmen right behind her. Either they were caught and they had to face Natalie despite the embarrassment or they got to the footage before Natalie saw it.  

Y/n let Carmen lead her to Natalie’s room, who thankfully was still laying on her side, Pete had gone to the restroom. 

Y/n leaned up to Carmen before whispering, “Distract her.” Carmen sat near Natalie and asked her if she wanted some ginger-ale or if he should stop by a pharmacy. 

Natalie's phone was on the nightstand and y/n swiped it when Natalie wasn’t looking before unlocking her phone with the password she acquired from being noisy. She then deleted the footage of the last hour from her Ring app. Y/n wanted to scroll back a few months to watch Carmen call her for the first time but she didn’t have enough time. 

Y/n set the phone exactly how she found it and gave Carmen a subtle thumbs up. 

“I’m fine, I think I need to sleep this off.” Natalie sat up while glancing at y/n and y/n had to resist freezing like a criminal caught in the spotlight. 

“I’m really sorry-” Natalie started.

“Please don’t be. I had a great time. Is there anything we can do for you before we leave?” Y/n felt bad for taking advantage of Natalie’s pregnancy induced sickness but this was a matter of prestige, she wouldn’t be able to set foot in this house if Natalie ever saw the footage.  

Natalie shook her head no and they said their goodbye’s before Camren and y/n practically tripped over themselves running out of that house. They sprinted to the car and slammed the doors shut before bursting out laughing. Y/n felt like she was a teenager again, sneaking her boyfriend out the fire escape before her mom walked in. Carmen pushed his forehead into the steering wheel to laugh and the sound that echoed felt like it was melting itself into y/n’s brain, forever branded into her memory. 

“How many times have you been here, Carmen? You never noticed the fucking camera, you dick?” Y/n struggled to shake off the heat that pulsed up her body, Camren hadn’t even started the car yet and she was burning up. 

“I…I never looked, what kind of freak looks?”Carmen said in between laughs. Y/n gave him a fake look of disapproval.

“Turn the car on, Berzatto, you’re getting on my fucking nerves.”

Carmen turned on his car before pulling out of Natalie’s driveway, he was still snickering and in the streetlight y/n could see his neck turn bright red. 

“Stop by a CVS or something.” Y/n said while fiddling with the radio.

“You think you caught something from Nat.” Y/n resisted telling him that pregnancy wasn’t contagious, men are so fucking stupid. 

“You have condoms on you?” Carmen slammed on the break, lucky they were at a red light.

“N...no.” Scarlet crawled up his neck and up his face. Y/n didn’t know someone’s ears could ever get that red before. Carmen stayed still trying to collect his fractured thoughts. 

“It's green, Carmen.”

He stepped on the gas and y/n was glad that the roads were practically empty because he was driving like he had all the insurance in the world. He pulled over to a Walgreens and ran out of the car. Y/n shook her head at his shit parking, he was in between two spots. Carmen came back in a minute with a plastic bag, y/n could decipher from the shapes that he had also bought some gatorades too. 

Carmen pulled out of the parking lot.

Y/n didn’t recognize the streets on their ride back, “Your place?” 

“Mine is closer.” Carmen replied, his voice tinged with a mix of anticipation.

Y/n could help but giggle, she always loved it when he was desperate. She knew it was wrong, but she always felt such a rush of excitement when her control over him was at its pinnacle and they both knew it.

When they reached a stop sign, y/n glanced over at Camren and saw that he was already looking back at her. 

They couldn’t seem to care that they were wading in uncharted waters and they couldn’t convince themselves that this was going to end badly enough for them to not at least try. If they looked at each other like that, there was no way they were going to let each other go. 

__

End Notes:

Fire + Ice = Vapor; It took me an embarrassing amount of time to think of that.

There is a lot of tension and maturity that needs to be written in smut for it to be good and I just can’t do that. I tried for this one and I had to close my laptop and take a lap because the second hand embarrassment was too much. So those drafts have been deleted and I’m glad I never have to see them again. 

I didn't think people would like Turbulence, I was going to delete it after a few hours and just keep it to myself but i'm glad that people liked it so ig it's here to stay. I tried to keep this one more contained then Turbulence bc writing about multiple days is such a pain.

I really don’t know what else I might write about for these two, or in general, so if you have any suggestions feel free to send them to me. If your suggestion inspires me, you better believe that I'm going to get out of bed at 2 in the morning and start writing. Or we can bury these two in a shallow grave and forget they exist, which is also fine by me because I think fic aged me.

[cloudluvrrr]

"...I'm like your mother" Dan Heng x reader

minilial - asked: "Dan Heng with lazy reader so he would always act like a nagging mother and often scold reader"

--

why r the ones w black hair and emo the most put together cahracters dude (and the ones i want)

anyways HERE YOU GO POOKIE 💞

-- in the afternoon - the cardigans

-

you two were and unlikely pair, the most lazy and clumsy person (you) and dan heng the quiet rational one on the express.

-when he sees you lazing (wtf i s that a word) around he'll wack you with paper and drag you along with him to organize the archives (yay)

"this isn't fair" you huffed organizing the information he'd given you form penacony. "just do it, you have nothing better to do" he replied reading a book on the floor. "well your reading a book!" you mocked looking over at him "because I finished all my work, what have you done besides play game on your phone?" he said looking up at you. ".." with nothing to say you returned to your work, mocking him and grumbling under your breath.

-Even though neither of you have energy you two squabble a lot

-often about you doing nothing while he does all the work

-but he loves you beneath all that scolding and hitting

-he'll show it through buying you trinkets 😜or food (both r good)

-

you two were cuddling in YOUR bed (bc he sleeps on the floor like a weirdo) he read a book as you loosely followed along, before he remembered something. "hey did you clean the hallway like i asked" he asked looking over at you, soon realizing you forgot and looked away. "..yes" "don't lie to me, do i have to lock your phone away again. "WHAT NO" immediately getting up to do as your told.

"...I'm like your mother, telling you what to do" he said watching you get up. upon hearing this you stuck your tongue out and went to clean the hall.

-like i said before he often wacks you on the head, or tugs at your cheek/ear.

-when everyone else is gone though he'll kiss your cheek and rub it

'you dont listen to me, its for your own good'

'your not my mom your my boyfriend'

'.....'

-well more often than not he'll find you laying on the couch or sleeping, which he will drag you, and make you help him do something.

-that or he'll scold you for being on your phone too much

-and then you'll insult his phone case

-which ends up in him confiscating your phone and making you read

-but he loves you really, he can't really show it. But when your sleeping he will tuck you in and kiss your forehead. Or leave you credits to spend where ever the express is parked

-its when your awake where the problem begins

'i hate you' you grumble cleaning the windows alongside him

'you love me'

'....not right now'

--

this one is short and kinda bad but I HOPE YOU ENJOYED 😭

dude i got an email from my school

I WILL NO LONGER BE FREE 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔 im old as fuck

THANK YOU FOR 24 FOLLWOERS 😭😭🥳🥳

im glad you guys like my shit posting and bad fics 😍

(btw can u guys tell hwen i post from my computer vs my phone

-- COMMETN LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE I LOV YOU

[hangmanssunnies]

Inconceivable!

Summary: No one tells you how hard it is to have to plan to leave and hurt the love of your life. However, when you know you want different things, you must choose. And your baby is probably the only thing you can ever imagine choosing over Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw.

Pairings: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Fem! Reader

Fandom: Top Gun: Maverick 

Word count: 8.2k words

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, fertility problems, panic attacks, Angst with a happy ending, threatening to break Brad's heart, so many references to The Princess Bride,Soft!smut, Soft!Bradley, Organized!Bradley. Let me know if I missed any others.

Authors Note: No use of Y/N. As always, I love BradBrad so much y'all. I don't know if I can write nonangsty smut. I was thinking of him and kids. The next thing you know I wrote whatever this is. Bradley wearing glasses 🥵. I hope you enjoy this! My inbox is always open if you want to let me know your thoughts. Reblogs with your thoughts, opinions, and tags are always appreciated as well! I love reading through them.

You knew Bradley never wanted to be a father, which was just fine with you because you knew you couldn't have kids. You had known about your fertility problems for a long time and had long ago come to peace with it. 

Y'all had several conversations about children when you first started dating. Once you both felt like your feelings on the matter were hashed out, you had never really felt like revisiting the topic. Your life wasn't less or empty without kids. You were perfectly content with the life you and Rooster had made together. 

That's why you have no idea what to do with the situation you are in right now. You were at your gynecologist for your annual check-up. Taking a pregnancy test was standard procedure, something you didn't even bat your eyes about or worry over. What you weren't prepared for was the positive results back. 

"I'm sorry?" You choked out in disbelief. "That can't be possible."

"I know this is probably surprising, but," your doctor starts to say before you cut them off. 

"No. No, I have known since I was 17 that I can't get pregnant."

"Well, you are and can. Sometimes miracles like this can happen," your doctor responded kindly. 

She went on to ramble more and talk about some next steps and options. You felt shocked, not entirely sure how to process the information she was throwing your way. You left the office a bit later, promising to set up a follow-up appointment. 

Your first thought was to get an abortion. It was the obvious solution. Bradley didn't want kids, and you hadn't wanted them either. Right? You tried to think if it was true. Was it that you didn't want kids or just that you couldn't have kids? 

For the next week, you tried to run the pros and cons and sort out your feelings on what was happening. You tried to act as normal as possible with Bradley. You didn't want to bring anything up until you knew how you felt.

Part of you kept coming back to when you were a little girl to how growing up before you knew that you couldn't have kids, the promise you would whisper to yourself. The promise of how you would do better than your own parents did. 

You thought of the fantasies you used to have: the baby shoes, baking in the kitchen guiding a tiny pair of hands, sports practices, matching sweaters for family holiday cards, first recitals, proms and homecomings, dropping them off for their first day of college, and parent's weekends where you buy cheap booze, family trips, the possibilities of grandkids. 

Now suddenly, all those fantasies were a possibility again. A reality that could come true in less than a year. Thinking about them brought an ache to your chest. An ache that manifested as want, a desire so strong all the cons you could come up with didn't really matter, well, all of them but one. 

The biggest problem of the puzzle was Bradley, the love of your life. You had absolutely no doubt that he would do the right thing and stay by your side. However, you didn't want him to be a dad because he had to do it. The thought of him being forced to do something he didn't want to, just because it's the right thing, made your stomach roll. The idea of part of him resenting you, and eventually your child too, because of something you chose. That was something you couldn't live with. 

So even though you felt a heavy hurt in your chest, you knew you had to leave Bradley. You weighed that heartbreak compared to the want for this child that had bloomed in your chest, and one outweighed the other. So now, on top of thinking about the baby, you started to think through quiet plans of how it would hurt your husband least to leave him. 

You almost broke down one night and told him the two of you had been lying on the couch together. Bradley was casually spooning you from behind, one of his hands playing with a lock of hair while the movie he picked played on the TV. Of course, it was the Princess Bride, one of his all-time favorites. 

You were half watching the movie, half dozing. Bradley was too good at soothing you, and you had started noticing a significant change in your energy levels as of late. You mentally made a note to bring it up at the follow-up doctor's appointment you had scheduled. 

"I would do that," Bradley suddenly says, bringing you back to alertness. 

"Oh really?" you hum, unsure what he was talking about. 

"Yes, I would wait five years and chase after kidnappers, fight the prince, build a tolerance to poison, all for you, baby." 

Bradley's honest love for you warmed your chest like it always did. However, the current circumstances turned that warmth into a bitter aftertaste in the back of your throat. What you were doing haunted you. His hand drops your hair and traces down your arm until he threads your fingers together. His large hand in yours helped further break down your resolve. 

"What if I asked you to do something you didn't want to?" You ask him hesitantly. 

"If you wanted me to, then I would," Brad tells you plainly. As if that were a given, you should just expect that his desires would line up with yours. It doesn't put you at ease like you were hoping it would. 

"What if it was something you really didn't want to. Something bigger than sword fights and rodents of unusual size?" 

His hand flexes squeezing yours a little tighter. Bradley doesn't say anything for a moment, and you wait with bated breath. Finally, he nuzzles your neck with his nose before asking, "Do you have something specific in mind?" 

That was the moment, the moment that you could come clean to him. You could be honest and lay it all out on the table, but you don't. You can't. You aren't ready to let him go yet; it's too soon, you tell yourself. 

So you lie to him, finally pushing the words out your throat, "No, nothing specific. Just asking." 

Bradley's fingers that are laced with yours squeeze yours again, and you have the sneaking suspicion that he doesn't believe your lie. "Well, even if it was big. We would do what we always do. We'll talk about it and figure it out. Then I'll agree with what you want, just like I always do."

"You shouldn't do things you don't want to do just for me, Brad," you chastise him lightly. The heavy pit in your chest constricts even more. 

He kisses your head, pulling you a little tighter against him in his embrace. "Sure, whatever you say, babe." 

The whole thing sits with you for another week, and the doctor's appointment you made starts to creep closer. You are reading an article in incognito mode on your phone about nutrition during pregnancy and the importance of vitamins. Occasionally, you glance up to see Bradley sitting on the other side of the couch. 

He has a thick World War Two biography book wide open, nearing the end. His reading glasses are perched on the edge of his nose. Even though you had teased Brad relentlessly when he first got them, the glasses were actually really hot. The sight of them on him now makes heat start to bud in the bottom of your abdomen. 

You lock your phone and set it aside, looking more thoroughly at Bradley now. He was so so very handsome. You found it unlikely there would ever be another man you would allow into your bed after him. The edges of panic that seep into you every time you consider the inevitable end with Bradley makes a reappearance. You push it to the side as much as possible, but it creates a sudden desperation for him in you. 

"Bradley."

"Yes, my love?" He asks, not looking up from the page in front of him. 

"I need something."

"What do you need?" He turns the page of his book and pushes those damn glasses higher up the bridge of his nose. 

"I need you," you tell him, biting your lip. 

His eyes snap up from the page to look at you, and his eyebrows raise, processing your words. "What was that?"

"I need you to make love to me, Brad. I'm on fire." 

He dog ears the page he is on his book and sets it on the coffee table, turning to give you his full attention. His hands casually trace up your leg, massaging the tense muscles of your claves. 

You let out a soft sigh at the feeling. A few moments later, Bradley crawls up your body, pressing soft kisses to your neck and then melding his lips to yours. You sigh into his mouth, enjoying the taste of him, trying to savor it. You pull off his reading glasses so they aren't in the way, haphazardly tossing them away. 

When he starts to pull away, you wrap your arms around him, drawing him closer, not wanting any space between you. You trace one of your hands down his neck and under the collar of his shirt, tracing his shoulders, kissing him harder, slipping your tongue into his mouth. 

"What has got you so needy, sweet girl?" He asks you, confused, pressing a few soft sweet kisses to your throat.

"Just you, handsome man," you tell him, trying to draw Bradley back to your lips. Bradley smiles, hearing your words but then shifts off you and the couch. 

Before you can protest at his absence, he goes to pick you up. Like every time Bradley picks you up, you are hit with the worry that it will be the time he can't do it, or he will drop you, make heaving grunting sounds, or some other terrible mishap will come to pass. It doesn't, though; he secures you in his arms and starts to carry you through the house to your room. 

You start pressing kisses to the readily presented column of his neck then. When he reaches your bed and goes to put you down, you sink your teeth into the space where his neck starts to curve into his shoulder. Although he lets out a hiss, you hadn't held back with the bite. You made it intending to mark him. 

When he does set you down, you scramble hurriedly to start undressing him, desperate to see and feel the expanses of his golden skin. Unfortunately, you only get Brad out of his teeshirt before he stops you. His large hands close around your wrists, holding them tight, preventing them from moving further down, lower than the top of his abdomen. 

"Slow down, pretty girl. We got all the time in the world," he says. You know, he said it to be soothing, but he didn't know how wrong he was. He didn't understand the finite amount of time you had left together. 

So when he lets go of your wrist, you instead start to pull off your own clothes and settle yourself on the bed. You stare at him expectantly and let out the smallest huff. 

"Slow down." He tells you again, "And, don't move your hands off the headboard," When he is satisfied with how you are holding it, he starts to kiss down your body. 

"Why are you so worried?" he breaths out against your inner thigh, pressing feather-light kisses to the skin there. "You know I'm going to take care of you, my love. I always do. There's no reason to be so worried."

Bradley's words manage to hit the exact spot of comfort you are actually needing. Even though you are planning on leaving him. You still want him to take care of you; you want to do this with him. But, you also know that can't happen. So, regardless you feel more at ease; the desperation in you is not quite so hot, not making you jittery with need. 

Bradley rewards the way your body relaxes by licking stripe over you. You resist the urge to let go of the headboard and bury your hands in Bradley's thick hair. The way he sucks your clit into his mouth to roll his tongue over makes you arch, needing more. Bradley lays his arm across your hips, applying pressure to keep you still under him. 

The more you work to struggle against his arm, feeling your high edge closer and closer, a thought suddenly pops into your head. Is it still okay for Bradley to hold you down like this? Are you going to hurt your baby? It's an irrational thought, you know that, but your body instantly reacts to it. Of course, so early into your pregnancy, there is no reason this would be a problem, but you still drop your hips down onto the bed, no longer trying to move them against him. Your distraction pulled you far back from the edge. 

You try to focus on the feel of Bradley's tongue and how warm he feels with his shoulders caged between your thighs. But only a few breaths later, Bradley is lifting his head to look at you. 

He has a crease between his eyebrows, and his tongue that was just around you darts out to lick to own lips. "What just stopped you from coming?" he asks, concerned. His voice is thick and low. His hold over your waist disappears as he draws soothing circles on your hip. Bradley's concern draws you back to him and into the want you have for him. 

You let go of the headboard and stretch out your arms. Then, burying your hands in his hair, you tilt Brad's face to fully meet your eyes. 

"Make love to me, Bradley," you beg him. He stares at you for a very long minute, and you stare back at him, waiting. Finally, he pulls his eyes away from yours and stares at your center in front of him. 

"As you wish," he mutters the words. Rooster pulls himself off the bed and pulls his sweats off. You drag your eyes over his naked body, taking him all in. You lick your lips at the sight. 

"You are breathtaking, Brad," you tell him. That smile that melts your heart shows up on his face, and he glows under your praise.  

You crawl to the edge of the bed and trace your hands up his muscular thighs. You guide your hand upwards. You brush over his cock, not really giving it any attention, before outlining his side, watching his stomach and abs contract under your fingers. You go slowly, trying to memorize the feel of his skin under you. You kiss along his chest too. 

He leans down and captures your lips. You kiss Rooster back, glad that the fervor has left your body, but you are no less desperate for him. The desire to memorize him doesn't go. 

You urge him onto the bed, pushing him on his back. You straddle Bradley, settling over him, with his cock nestled in between your lower lips. You give a small rock, his head bumping into your clit. You moan a little and repeat the motion. 

Leaning forward, you rest your hands on his chest to give you more leverage. Rooster moves his hips with you increasing the friction. The pace is slow and almost teasing for both of you. 

Shifting your weight, you lean and kiss him again. Bradley's tongue slips into your mouth, running against yours. One of his hands comes up and rests on your hip, urging you, pulling you further down to rub against him harder. His other hand cups one of your breasts, his thumb running over your nipple in swirling strokes. 

You break his embrace just to reach your hand and guide him inside. Bradley lets out a heavy sigh as he slips into you. You resist the urge to slide all the way down his length, keeping it slow. 

"Fuck, you feel so good," he tells you, biting his lips. 

"Love how you fill me, Brad," you sigh once he is fully hilted. Both of you are breathing more elevated. When you start to move your hips again, Bradley closes his eyes and presses his head back into the bed. 

You immediately stop moving, glaring down at him. "No," you say, and his eyes open instantly, looking at you again. You reach up a hand to grip his chin affectionately, holding his face in place. "I need to see you." 

"You are so beautiful," he tells you. Bradley does as you want and doesn't break eye contact again. 

The room is filled with both of your moanings as you work together at a slow, steady pace. The way his hands run along your skin and back is almost reverent. The heat in you starts to build again. You grind down hard onto Bradley so that your clit gets more stimulation. 

Rooster's right hand comes around and settles on your lower stomach, applying pressure and letting his thumb dip down to brush your clit in light strokes. You gasp, a moan breaking from your throat. You freeze on top of Bradley's cock, enjoying the zing his thumb just sent up your spine. 

"That's right. So good." Bradley moans out, pressing his thumb harder into you. Even though he is filling you so deliciously, you don't feel close enough to him. You feel like you want to crawl into his skin. That would be the only thing that would satisfy your need for him. 

You grab his hand that isn't on your clit and thread your fingers together. His hand grips yours back. Bradley doesn't make any movement to shift either of your hips, content to play with your clit and stare into your eyes. 

"Fuck, I love you." Bradley groans out, biting his lower lip. You start to rock your hips into his again, but for the most part, keeping him fully hilted inside you. You almost feel like you are drowning in his eyes with how he looks up at you. His heavy-lidded gaze makes you clench around him.

Your moans and quiet pants mix with his. The tension in you grows as you swirl your hips into his. 

"Need this, need you." Bradley swirls his thumb a little harder and does break eye contact to nip your neck, sitting more up on the bed to get a better angle. Having more of your skin pressed together helps ease more of the ache in you. 

You grip his hair again, pulling him up, shifting, so you are chest to chest. Bradley's free hand clutches you close to him. You trace the scars on his cheek with your lips before kissing him again. 

"I love you," you sigh against his mouth. He groans and rocks his hips into yours, creating a bit more friction. Rooster understands just what you need, not pulling out of you. 

The two of you build a rhythm together; finally, you can't hold back anymore. The bubble in you bursts, and you clench hard around Bradey's cock. Bradley takes a few more gasping breaths and then cums in you with a low moan. Bradley starts to move like he is going to pull out of you, so you whine and hold him closer.  

"No, no. I need you closer," you tell him. You are still desperate to have him near. You press your nose into Rooster's neck, breathing in his natural musky scent. Trying to absorb the smell entirely, memorizing it before biting the skin and tasting it. 

"Woah. Woah," Bradley says breathily. You let out a low hum in response, trying to savor his sounds as well. You wiggle your hips against him again, where he is still half hard. You consciously clench around his dick, reminding yourself how full Bradley makes you. 

"Baby, stop," he says. Rooster's voice is wrecked, and his large hands hold your hips still. At first, you don't even hear his request until he repeats it more forcefully. Then he rolls you over onto your back and pulls out of you quickly. You gasp at the sudden loss of him. You have to lay there for a moment, trying to reorient yourself. Bradley is sitting on the edge of the bed, panting hard, his hands on his knees.

"Bradley?" You croak out, reaching a hand hesitantly towards him. He looks back at you, and his face is a mix of panicked and furious.

"What the fuck was that?" He asks you in a low growl.

"What was what?"

"Don't bullshit me."

"I have no idea what you are talking about," you tell him, drawing your eyebrows close together.

"That was was goodbye sex," he says slowly. Your mouth drops open, and you try to reach around your rattling brain to come up with an answer, an excuse. However, you find it completely empty. 

"That was the exact kind of sex we have before I leave and deploy. You had the same look." Bradley was almost shaking, and you had no idea what to say that wouldn't be a lie. 

"What's going on? Something has been wrong for weeks. I keep waiting for you to talk to me, and you fucking haven't." 

"I —" you start to say, but Bradley's eyes are so captivating, so genuine, you can't lie to him. So before you even know what you are saying, the words fall out of your mouth, "I'm leaving."

Rooster physically recoils at your words. The line of his back is taut, and his eyebrows draw together. His mouth presses into a tight line. His jaw flexing, and you can tell he is clenching his teeth. "What did I do wrong?"

"No, sweetie," you say quickly. "It's not you. It's me." You tell him gently. It was you, well, you and this baby, but Brad didn't need to know that. Your words only seemed to make him more upset. 

"Are you kidding me? You didn't just say that." He mutters it under his breath, pulling at his short curls in frustration and glaring at you. He is so tense the veins in his bicep and neck start to pop. 

"I'm sorry," you offer him quietly. 

"I don't want to hear sorry. I want to hear a reason. Were you going to tell me? Or just planning to disappear?"

"Of course, I was going to tell you."

"When?" 

"Soon."

"Why? "

"I can't..."

"No. I think I deserve to know why the love of my life is leaving me," Bradley says, frustrated. He stands up from bed, goes to his drawers, and pulls on some boxers to throw on. He also grabs one of his old Sigma Pi shirts out of his drawer and throws it for you to shrug on. 

You felt shame and frustration building in you. You didn't want to deal with this situation right now. You didn't want to have to tell Bradley why. Then to your absolute horror, and probably the hormones coursing through you, you burst into tears. 

Bradley's pacing halts for a moment at the sight of your tears, but then he resumes momentarily as he balls his fist tight. His knuckles turning a paler shade. 

"We want different things." You gasp out between the sobs racking your body. 

"We want different things," he repeats slowly, like he is trying to piece out some hidden meaning in the words.

"Yes," you hiccup nodding your head. 

"How could that be possible?" He questions you sharply. "If that were the case, we wouldn't have gotten married. And you didn't mention anything when we had our last relationship check-in."

Bradley was big on communication. He insisted y'all have seasonal relationship check-ins with each other to talk about anything that had happened and how you were feeling about your relationship. This conversation should have probably been reserved for the next one, but you couldn't wait a few more weeks before leaving, or Bradley would know.

You were going to start showing at some point; while all the articles you read were inconsistent about when that might happen, it would happen eventually. You knew it would probably be impossible to leave Rooster if he knew that you were pregnant. Every moment with him weakened your resolve to do the right thing. 

"Things change, people change." You weakly tell him. Not able to conceive a better excuse. 

"I don't understand why you are jumping into leaving me. Baby, why won't you talk to me?" Bradley suddenly dropped hard to his knees on the wood floor at the side of the bed. You winced at the sound it made. He pulls one of your hands into both of his. "Please talk to me," he begs you, holding your hand delicately in his. The puppy dog look Bradley has mastered coming out in full force. 

"I can't…"

"You can," he reassures you, swiping a thumb across your pulse point. You felt your stomach roll, the emotions in you going haywire. 

"I'm…" you trail off and then shake your head at him in denial of this situation. As soon as you tell Bradley, it will be over. 

"It's okay, baby. Anything. You can tell me anything. Talk to me. I won't be mad," he adds on for your benefit. Your plans all crumbled at that moment because how can you deny Bradley Bradshaw anything when he begs for it. 

"I'm pregnant," you finally whisper in a barely audible voice. With how Bradley reacted to your words, you might as well have screamed them. First, he flinches like a whole body flinch. Every muscle you can see tensing. He shutters and his grip on your hand tightens to where it is almost painful.  

Bradley freezes like that for a moment, blinking at you owlishly, before he drops his head down, hiding his face from your view. Finally, he presses his face down into the bed. 

You wait with bated breath. Rooster's grip on your hand didn't lessen in the slightest. You feel panic settle in the back of your throat when his shoulders start to tremble, and he still hasn't said anything.

"Bradley?" You flex your hand, resisting his tight grip, and he releases you. His hands fall limply on the bed. He still hasn't looked at you, though. 

Tears start to streak down your face faster, and a small sob hitches in your throat. "I am sorry," you tell him sincerely. 

"Are you really?" His low voice asks muffled. 

"Sorry, or pregnant?" You ask pulling up the collar of his shirt you are wearing to wipe away some of your tears. "Because it's both." 

His hands come to clasp themselves together, and you briefly wonder if he is praying. The shaking of his shoulders and the inability to see his face make it increasingly impossible to understand his reaction.

Finally, he looks at you, and those hazel eyes bleed back at you, tears still falling down his face staining his cheeks a bright red even through the healthy tan he has right now. Bradley's eyes trace over your face looking like he is searching for any trace of a lie. Then he examines your body under his shirt like he might already see a difference. 

As if there was a difference, he would be able to notice now that he didn't notice before when you were naked, and he was inside of you. You wrap your arms around your chest, hugging yourself under his scrutiny. 

"I'm going to keep it." You finally tell him now that Bradley's shining eyes are available for scrutiny again. His tongue darts out to wet his lips, and his face falls into a frown. "I'm sorry," you say again. 

You try to think of the right words to explain yourself to him. "When I found out, I realized I wanted this. I know we always said we didn't. But I really want this baby, Bradley. I am sorry I kept it from you. I just didn't know how to tell you. And then I saw these baby shoes in the store. They were so cute." Your fingers knot into the edge of the worn frat shirt you are wearing. His hazel eyes aren't giving you much to go off of. They are still darting around your face like he is trying to figure out what you are telling him. 

Brad abruptly stands up in the middle of your rambling. So, you halt your words. Watching him as he walks out of the room. You strain your ears, trying to listen to where he went. You hear the hallway door open and beeps coming from the safe. After hearing it click open and seal again, Bradley's feet can be heard on the hallway floor again. 

Your mind runs, trying to think of what he could have grabbed from the safe. Your important documents? You silently make a note that was something that you need to be sure to pack. You wouldn't want to come back to Bradley to get your passport or something after leaving. Could it be money? Was he going to give you money to leave with and give you some of the cash you two had been saving to move? 

The thoughts make breathing extra hard, and you start to suck air in and out rapidly. The panic floods your veins, making the walls of the room shrink inward towards you. Sharp tingles prick at your fingertips and toes. 

Before you can run through any other possible scenario, he gets back. 

You can't focus on Bradley enough to see him through the black that starts to edge in at the corner of your vision. You desperately try to pull a gasping breath in your chest. The action of breathing is suddenly too overwhelming. 

The panic of what you had just done finally cutting into you. That Bradley now knew the secrets you had been harboring so close to your chest. There is wringing in your ears, the shuddering wracking your body. You curl into yourself to try and shield yourself from the hurt and panic ringing through your body. 

Then, you are engulfed. There isn't enough weight on the outside of you to combat the storm of panic that was trying to burst out from the inside of your veins. Numbness fills your body, and you know you are close to passing out. The storm brewed inside you, desperate to escape your body, desperate to take you out at the same time. 

Heaving in breaths gets harder and more difficult. You dig your nails hard into the skin of your thighs, trying to scramble for anything to steady yourself. Fighting each desperate moment when there is s shift.

At first, you don't know what has changed. However, your breaths get a gasp longer, allowing slightly more oxygen, and the black in your vision starts to recede. You slam your eyes shut at the nausea you feel. The more air you can finally take in, the more you are allowed to start making sense of anything besides your own haywire body. 

You are wrapped in your weighted blanket, and the extra pressure is aided by Bradley. He is holding you tight within his arms and legs, and he has you pulled close to his chest.

His legs are wrapped around your hips and crossed in front of you. Giving the front of your body room. Your legs are trapped between you two. One of his arms is crossed over your chest, and the other is petting your head soothingly, playing with your hair occasionally. 

Bradley is humming to you. You try and focus on the tune. It's like a lifeline; you cling to the sound, letting it help your thoughts trail away from your panic. You keep trying to breathe bigger, longer breaths consciously now. 

It's a tune you have heard before. Finally, Bradley breaks from the humming, whispering one of the lyrics into your ear, and you can immediately place the song. 

"Love of my life," he mutters lowly into your ear, and then he returns to his humming. You are flashed back to a different time he sang this song to you. 

He had been perched on the bench of a piano. Fingers gliding over the keys in time, his sweet voice dipping between octaves. It was Love Of My Life, by Queen. It is the song Bradley sings to you before every single deployment. 

The song feels like a confirmation that you two will not be making it. A confirmation he is letting you go. This is the song that always fills the space between you when parting ways. The small semblance of recovery you had made is gone. Your breaths start to quicken again as you are dragged back into the panic. 

Bradley's arms flex hard, and there is slightly more pressure around you. The beads of the weighted blanket shifting under his hands. He continues humming the song, but this time he peppers in a few more of the lyrics. 

"Love of my life, don't leave me," he croons softly into your ear. 

You don't know how long Bradley holds you waiting for you to calm down. You don't ever feel at ease, but the slow breaths and Bradley's soothing voice help bring you down from the high and worst of the panic attack.  

You manage to let out a little whimper, and Bradley's arms start to loosen around you in slow intervals. You turn your face to the side, slotting your eyes up to catch a glimpse of him. Bradley has his eyes closed, and his face is splotchy and red from crying still. You fill in some of the lyrics to his humming in a cracked, barely there voice. Those beautiful eyes flash open, hearing your voice join his humming. 

He won't stop humming, though. Rooster's hazel eyes are so intense, a medusas snare, that even as hard as you try to close your eyes, you aren't successful. They have captivated you entirely. Bradley finishes humming the song and lets his arms slip from around you. His legs uncross, and they fall flat on the bed on either side of you. 

You push the weighted blanket off your top, so it is pilled around your legs as you ease out of your curled position. 

"BradBrad," you whisper for him. You are still trembling at the very tips of your fingers. The buzz and tingles at the front of your nose are still persistent, but feeling has returned to the rest of your body. The needles fade out of your hands and legs. 

"Love of my life," he hums sweetly again. His eyes have a tiny bit of worry, but for the most part, they are full of love and adoration for you. His body is borderline hot to the touch and feverish behind you. His heart is thumping loudly under your ear. 

Brad's now loose hands find new purchase, gliding over your hips, tracing slow, steady circles. Then his left hand starts creeping forward further. Bradley's large hand is suddenly under his shirt and splaying out flat against your lower belly. That is where it finds its perch. 

You gasp at the feeling of his hand, at the placement of it. Brad's fingers make the tiniest indents pressing into your skin. Your breath hitches at his squeeze. The metal of his wedding ring is warm against your skin, a nice contrast to the rest of his hand. 

Hearing the way your breath hitches, Bradley immediately lays his hand fully flat. Bradley now retreating to a feather-light touch. His fingers swirl in an unknown pattern on your skin. His hands like to trace the shapes of flight paths he has memorized. 

It was something Bradley had confessed to you one night during pillow talk. The two of you sprawled together. You were laying half on his chest. His fingertips were tracing the length of your spine, in feather-light trials, moving from the base of your spine to the small of your back, then following the path again. His fingers would sometimes brush into your hair and give small scratches before tracing your flesh again. 

"How do you do that?" You finally had asked him.

"Do what?" He responded, but something about the glint in his eye told you he knew exactly what you were referring to. Rooster just wanted you to admit it out loud. 

"You are so consistent, but you keep me on my toes." Bradley's hand stills where it had been gliding on your back. Then he started to trace once more, but this time his fingers making small movements and taking on a new drag like pattern dancing across your back. 

"Is that right?" He asked you, but there was a full-blown boyish smirk donning his face. 

You nodded your head, licking your lips. The tingles that his hands were sending through your body started to warm you up even after just having finished with him. "Yes, it rocks my world. So, why don't you let me on the secret?"

"I'm just that good, baby," he told you cheekily. 

"Bradley Bradshaw." You warned lowly.  

"It's flight paths." 

"What?"

"I use the flight paths I have memorized," his fingers danced in a looping motion doubling back and then tracing forward again.

"They make it easy to loop, but it's long enough that there is different pacing, or I use the piano," He told you, letting his fingers tap and shift along your back as if it was a set of ivories suddenly. It had made you giggle. 

"That might have been one of the sexiest things you have ever told me, Bradley." You had told him before you kissed him silly. And letting him showcase those skills with his tongue for the second time that night. 

Now, Brad's hand that is lying against your stomach also starts to follow a pattern. You open your mouth, but Bradley quickly cuts you off. 

"Please, don't say sorry."

"But I am."

"That was a bad attack."

It was true that you hadn't had one that severe in a while. "I'm—"

"Do not say sorry," he repeats. You sigh heavily and move to stop leaning against Bradley. However, he doesn't let you. The hand on your hip and lower abdomen fighting you and drawing you flush against him. He settles you, so you are comfortably leaning against his chest again.

"I am sorry," Brad finally says, almost a whisper in your ear. 

"You are sorry?"

"Yes."

"Why?" You question him. Not sure you understand what he is apologizing for.

"Why are you going to leave me?" Brad asks instead of answering your question. 

You sigh and close your eyes. You lean your head back, so it's settled on Bradley's shoulder. Then take a deep calming breath before responding. "I know you don't want kids. You have always been very honest about that, and it's not your fault I'm pregnant. 

"Well, I don't think you went and got pregnant by yourself. It's kind of a process that takes two contributing parties. Unless you are going to tell me that it's someone else's." Bradley says the words so incredulously that you know he has no doubt the baby is his. 

"I know you don't want this, but I realized I do."

"What if I do want this?"

"I'm not going to let you do this just because you feel obligated, Bradley," you tell him tiredly.

"No. I want this."

"How could that be?" You ask. 

You feel him shift behind you, and you open your eyes to see what he is doing. Bradley is reaching to the bedside table where you see a huge binder sitting. 

It is a binder that you know well. Bradley is a meticulous and organized person. He likes to refer to this binder as your Life Plan Binder. It was full of timelines, dates, references, and lists. Everything Bradley feels is necessary for y'all's life. 

You realize that this one is different from the one that lives on his desk. It is slimmer, and the front doesn't have a picture of the two of you slotted in the cover that the other did. 

"The LPB?" You ask him, confused.  

His left hand makes itself at home again on your lower abdomen, while his right hand puts the binder on your lap. Finally, you read the cover where it says alternative plans in bold lettering. 

"I'm sorry I left earlier, but I needed to get this." He mutters into your ear. Brad's tone is deeply apologetic. He flips the binder open, and there are labeled tabs. You fully realize this is a binder you have never seen before. You scan the tabs and freeze up in Bradley's hold when you see the one he is thumbing to.

It is towards the back, behind the different tabs, including restations, health, new cars, vacations, and retirement, is a tab that has a simple label. It's blue and just says, baby. Bradley flips to the tab, and you see the cover page of the section with the table of contents. In bold at the top of the page, you read Baby Bradshaw. 

A sob that ends up coming out as a broken laugh ripping from your chest. The section contents was filled out with thoroughly thought out plans on you having children, from a section with important timelines, appointments to schedule, college savings plans, and a section with boys' and girls' names that he likes. 

You bring one of your hands up to stifle the sobs that are bubbling in your chest. You hold your hand close over your mouth to try to hold back the sound. His fingers traced over the page and the table of contents for the section. 

"What is this?" You finally ask him. 

"It's my alternate life plan binder. For you know, if other things come up."

"Why do you have a Baby Bradshaw section?" You hesitantly ask. His hand is still warm against your stomach, and he flexes his fingers. 

"Well, a while ago, I started thinking about kids," he trails off, and you start looking through the table of contents again. You see that the most robust and largest section is actually related to adoption. You feel your heart melt in your chest. A new bright feeling of hope blossoms looking at the care, time, and thought he has put into this. As he continues, "and well… You know how I am. I wanted to be prepared for that possibility."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"I've been ruminating, and I don't know. Maybe I would have mentioned it at our next check-in. But I knew you don't…" Bradley doesn't finish his sentence, and you lose your mind a little bit.

You pull the large binger up into your hands and shift. You struggle and move until you turn in his grip. Your legs wrapped around Brad's waist. You want to see his face, which is easier in this position. The hand that had been placed on your stomach curls around your back and waist, steadying you against him. 

"You changed your mind?" You ask him. You let your hands trace over his chest, settling on cupping his face. Then, staring into his eyes, you look for any trace of anger or deceit. 

"You seem to also have changed your mind, baby," he takes the binder from where it was awkwardly pressed in between you two. It allows you to settle closer to him. Bradley sets the binder to the side, momentarily breaking eye contact to make sure none of the pages are creased. Your chests were almost flush together. You wrap your arms around his neck, and then he is the one to hold your face. His eyes reconnect with yours, and you once again feel like you are caught in them. 

The intensity and openness in his gaze make your lips move faster than your brain to lay out the whole truth for him. "I don't think that I ever wanted to not have kids. I had just accepted it because I knew that I couldn't." You explain, not breaking eye contact. Bradley's thumb traces a slow circle against your cheek. 

"I would never let you do this by yourself."

"I can't just throw a wrench like this in your life, Brad." 

He immediately starts shaking his head in protest. "It's our life. I'm not going to lie to you and say that you didn't hurt my feelings. If you left me," Bradly heaves a heavy shaky breath. You briefly wonder if he is going to cry again. Then he continues to explain, "I would be broken… shattered. I feel even worse that you didn't want to talk to me or tell me."

You can tell how deeply you hurt him. Even though you knew what you were going to do was wrong, now that you and Bradley are talking about it. You know you need to try and explain your rationale no matter how messed up it was. 

"At first, I wasn't sure how I felt. I wanted to talk to you, but I couldn't do that before I knew how I felt. But then I kept thinking about all the times we talked about you not wanting kids. How you had so many good, valid reasons for feeling that way. I know you, Bradley. I knew that you would do the right thing as soon as I told you. But you don't need obligation ruling anymore of your life that it already does."  

"So what if I was obligated? I agreed to be obligated to you for the rest of our lives when we got married. I want to be bound to you. I want to shoulder your burdens, just like you shoulder mine," Bradley says.

"A child is a lifelong burden for you to shoulder," you say. You need to know, need to be fully sure Brad understands. 

"Do you think so low of me? Do you think I wouldn't love something that was a mix of you and me?"

"There are plenty of people in the world who don't love their children." You tell him, swallowing hard. 

He lets out a long sigh, his breath fanning a bit over your face. "I want this baby. I want this baby with you. I want to be at every doctor's appointment. I want to know everything I've missed. I want family vacations where I can buy a Hawaiian shirt in three different sizes for all of us. I want little league games. I want a baby to sing to sleep. I want someone to put on top of the piano and sing to like my dad did. I want us to paint a nursery. I want Disney trips. I want to fight about curfew. I want to make breakfast on Saturdays and spend Sundays in the shop with football, restoring a beat-up first car. I want to make dad jokes. Fuck, I need to buy a pair of new balances."

Warmth fills you at his words. You let out a small laugh picturing Bradley as a stereotypical dad. How he wants all of that with you. That you won't do this alone like you have mentally been preparing yourself for since finding out. You run your fingers up and down his neck trailing it down his shoulder as far as you can reach before tracing back to his neck. A content sigh falls from his lips, and his eyes close, enjoying your gentle caresses.

"What are some of the names?" You break the silence after his confessions.  

"I like Westley," he says with a small boyish smile. You bite back a grin at the name, playfully rolling your eyes. 

"Oh, and is Buttercup on your list for girl names?" You ask him teasingly. 

"Maybe," he says. You lean forward and peck his lips. 

"You're not going to leave me," Bradley whispers with conviction. You know he is still coming down from the emotional roller coaster you just went through together. You also know Brad is going to need time to fully process this conversation and the change about to happen in your lives. However, you also know, without a doubt, that Bradley will be holding your hand at your next doctor's appointment. 

"No, I'm not." You confirm and brush your lips over his softly. 

"Stay with me forever," Bradley begs you in a voice a little too small for you to handle. 

You hold the hazel gaze for a very, very long moment. You let him examine you, see the truth, and honestly bleeding in your gaze before you respond. What you want to say at first is: I love you. However, those words weren't quite right; they didn't seem to fully capture your intention and the emotion in your chest you felt for this man. So instead, you settle on the words you think will most closely allow him to understand. You brush your lips against him again, whispering your answer into them. 

 "As you wish, Bradley."

[natureismynature]

Oh fuck it- I did the analysis.

Anyway, I want you all to remember that this is me talking about CHARACTER MENTALITY. This is me analyzing these characters' THOUGHT PROCESSES about the whole situation.

This is not me victimizing anyone, this is not me making EXCUSES for anyone, and this is DEFINITELY not me blaming Tazercraft for the other islanders' thoughts and actions. This is just me looking at relationships and characterization.

Okay, so the whole "Tazercraft situation" is an interesting one. They were betrayed, they were forced to relive their trauma, they lost a dear friend in the process, and so many more things. And we know that the person who arrested them, Foolish, doesn't understand how severe his actions were. He did that for FUN, with little to no remorse at first. But for some reason, the Islanders aren't that mad at him? Why? Why aren't they hounding on him? Why aren't they pissed? Why aren't they trying to save Tazercraft? Why aren't they avenging them?

Well, because if you look at it, the Islanders know Foolish more than they know Tazercraft. Yes, they're all friends, but Pac e Mike aren't as, well, *close* to the other residents compared to Foolish. Yes, they organize a lot of events for all the Islanders to spend time together and have fun, but most of the time, they're building said events together rather than speaking with the others. It's not very common that Pac and Mike have deep and personal conversations with the other Islanders, but Foolish is almost always the emotional support himbo. And yeah, Foolish used to build a lot too, but lately, he's been spending more time with the others just bonding and talking and getting to know them.

My point is, almost NO ONE knows Tazercraft outside of "The guys who makes cool games and give haircuts". While everyone knows Foolish as more than "The silly guy who builds things."

The only people (that aren't Brazilian) who I can think of that are very close to Tazercraft outside of their events, are Etoiles (he wasn't informed when they were taken, he's clueless of the situation), Fit (he's the ONLY one who's truly angry at Foolish to the point of considering murder), and Foolish himself. It would be kind of hard to find a justifiable way to be very mad if you know almost nothing about the victims (and this is not me blaming Tazercraft, this is just me looking at how people in general would react to situations like this)

Now that we've talked about the Islanders' relationship with TC in general, let's talk about specifics.

Cellbit, why isn't he mad? Well, because he WANTS to believe in Foolish. He wants to TRUST in Fooish. Because they were friends first before they were in-laws. Foolish was the one who stayed by him when he was at his lowest. The one who kept him sane by being more insane than him. And if you guys remember, he's still under the impression that Foolish is doing this to protect Richas. Cellbit's SON. Plus, he BELIEVES in Tazercraft. "They got out before, they can get out again." (Also, let's not forget that he's probably a sleeper agent and was instructed not to intervene with it)

Forever, why isn't he mad? Now for this one I'm gonna talk meta. Well, similar to Cellbit, he's under the impression that Foolish is doing this for Richas. But unlike Cellbit, he's not fully convinced. ALSO unlike Cellbit, he doesn't really know Tazercraft that much, he doesn't share the same history as they do with Cellbit and Felps. Now that we've established that, let's talk meta. qForever treasures his family, we know that, but the last time he lashed out due to strong emotions, the FANDOM attacked ccForever. You think he'll act strongly again after that? He's controlling himself this time. Bidding his time, waiting for the bomb to drop, waiting for the truth to come out, so he doesn't make mistakes again.

Badboyhalo, why isn't he mad? Well, because he doesn't know Tazercraft (he often forgets who's Pac and who's Mike) and he's best friends with Foolish. As much as he wants to be impartial and fair on his judgment, he's still biased. He wants ANYTHING than to believe that Foolish is doing this by his own volition. He's trying his damn best to find anything to excuse Foolish's actions. His reaction when Foolish told him the truth was "Then why is everyone mad at you?" because to him, it's just normal Foolish behavior to sell out his friends for a gun.

Richarlyson, why isn't he mad? Because he's a literal CHILD. A child that is hopeful and loves his grandma very much. He's very close with Foolish, he copes through jokes, and has already lost so much. He doesn't want to lose his trust on Foolish too. So for now, he'll give him the benefit of a doubt.

Fit, why didn't he tell anyone that he found Pac and Mike? Well, because he could be putting his beloved son in danger if he said that. It was RAMON who asked him to keep it a secret. He has things at stake too. He cares for his friends, he's rightfully angry at Foolish, but he would never risk Ramon's life.

Jaiden, why is she siding with Foolish? Well, because she was lied to and she sees him as a trustworthy friend. She knows how it feels to be suspected by every, to be made an errand girl by the Feds. She thinks Foolish is in the same situation and wants to be there for him like many people were there for her.

Aypierre and Phil don't really have strong bonds with Pac and Mike so we can't really expect anything from them. They themselves are pretty out of touch with other players as well most of the time.

Now, let's talk about the "they would have been thrown in jail either way" sentence that the Islanders have been throwing around. They've been saying this because, well, it's the truth. No matter what, Pac and Mike would have been thrown in prison. The Islanders are just confused on why it had to be Foolish who arrested them. They all know of the illegal things that Tazercraft has been doing, and they all know what happens to people who break the rules, which is why no one was surprised when their illegal acts caught uo with them. I'd like to point out that the first person to be jailed was Maximus, and as far as the Islanders know, jail in the island isn't so bad because Max got out fine after a day. They're not AWARE of how fucked up the actual prison is because Max didn't experience what Pac and Mike did. I'm sure that if they finally see Tazercraft again and hear of the horrors they had to go through, people would be more angry and wary if anyone else gets imprisoned.

Tl;dr:

At the end of the day, it all boils down to biases and ignorance. The Islanders know nothing about the prison and they're very aware that Foolish would sell out his friends for free shit. They are not surprised about his actions because he was never shy to say he'd do anything for free things. And they are not that worried because they don't know how bad it was in the prison. They were all lied to, and they are all friends with Foolish. But I'm sure that if they hear the full story from Pac and Mike's side, they'd have a LOT to say to Foolish.

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

I feel there has been a shift and that either Harry or his team are gunning for Washington DC hosting Invictus 2027 rather than Birmingham.

First Johnny Mercer lost his seat following the elections. He attended IG Dusseldorf but also exchanged informations with H about one of his case (his security case I think?). So the Sussex have lost a big supporter there. Now the Pat Tillman award. Not only is he getting an award named after an american veteran, but ESPN is not backing down. He's clearly trying to appeal to an american audience and he's receiving some help for this.

And last, I feel the britsh public has only apathy left for him, which is probably the worst response for him. The brits dont care anymore he's a prince. They already have William and Kate, who do royaling much better than him. Americans might not agree with the way he's acted, but the BRF still has a lot of appeal worldwide, no matter what SM say, so getting close to a real prince is still attractive. So I think Harry might really pivot and try to earn americans affection through the veterans and IG.

Could be. Harry can want Washington for 2027 Invictus Games all he wants, but Washington doesn’t want him. I live in the region and work downtown, and there’s been no stories or PR or any kind of information about the Invictus Games bids. That tells me there’s not a whole lot of establishment interest here and that Harry doesn’t have a Washington insider to help grease the wheels (he had the Obamas’ support in 2016).

And since the DOD has their own games, the Warrior Games, Washington doesn’t really need Invictus. When they want a feel-good story of their own, they turn in-house to the Warrior Games and our military hospitals. Which is precisely why Harry is cozying up to Warrior Games and the DOD; he wants to fold Invictus and Warrior Games together into a powerhouse to give him the legitimacy here in the US that he desperately craves and is constantly blocked from.

But that’s not likely to happen - Harry’s rent-a-royal status complicates things politically with US/UK relations and he’s deeply unpopular with the American public. (And yes, DOD brass is 100% paying attention to the backlash on the Tillman Award.) not to mention that pesky little lawsuit over his immigration and visa status that the establishment (yes, both parties) wants squashed.

Right now, Harry’s only partner is ESPN and ABC (which is confirmed by some of the tea that’s spilled recently). That’s not enough to get Washington onboard to host. He needs an insider that’s VERY high up the food chain, like White House high or Pentagon high, and neither option seems to be happening.

Washington, by the way, is much more focused on getting the 2027 NFL Draft. They’ve only been talking about it for 3 years.Washington isn’t going to pitch the NFL Draft and Invictus Games in the same year. The city government and the local officials want the NFL Draft. Invictus Games can’t bring in a quarter of the revenue, advertising, and profit of the NFL Draft and DC government isn’t going to risk losing the potential for a NFL Draft for something less assured.

Don’t forget, the Washington bid for Invictus Games only became known when Harry announced the shortlist last month. That doesn’t bode well, and neither does not having made the selection yet. My guess is they’re waiting to see what happens with the US election because if Trump gets in, Harry’s screwed; Trump hates the Sussexes and his loyalty to the BRF has been made very clear. That’s not the welcoming committee Harry and Meghan want.

But we’ll see. Time will tell eventually.

Edit: An anon shared Invictus's announcement about when they'll announce the host for 2027 Invictus Games and that included a link to a press release about the bids. As it turns out, the Washington Invictus Games bid wasn't even made by the city. It was made by the organization that owns and operates many of the entertainment venues within DC in cooperation with the city. That the city isn't leading the bid is also very telling.

AND the local papers - including the Washington Post - didn't pick up the announcement that DC was shortlisted for the 2027 event. If there was really an investment in choosing DC, the Post and the local press would've picked it up to start promoting it to help bolster the bid.

[andypantsx3]

hi andie!

do u have any tips for corporate girlies? my friend is starting out in the corp world !! and got a lot of reality checks over how harsh and 'corporate' it is :((

Ohhhhh my god yeah corporate culture sucks!! It's just a bunch of adult babies using fancy words tbh lmao, acting like we're going to war and/or curing cancer when we're really just launching a product no one wants or needs lol.

Not sure what industry your friend is or what role she's in but here are some general tips, starting with practical project tips to more personal/sanity check tips lol.

Make sure you understand your organization's goals and success criteria. This is so basic but in order to understand what leadership cares about and how all the different project components fit in, you're going to want to learn what are all the active projects, who owns them, what success is being evaluated on, and how those performance indicators are being calculated. I work with some people who have no idea what is going on (which, fair) but it ends up creating a ton of churn and can look super bad for them if they are not in step with what our corporate overlords expect from them.

Clear communication is key. Never have I ever encountered more communication issues than working in corporate; people often have one image in their head of what a task looks like where their partner teams might have another, and if you don't outline all the key details together, you could end up delivering something unusable. If you're an individual contributor (aka a task doer), make sure you ask clarifying questions of the project leads if they haven't specified (like, what testing environment something needs to be deployed to, what are the release gating procedures, what is the expected timeline, etc). If you're a project manager, make sure you're clarifying those details with stakeholders and passing that information to your team; prompt your team to ask questions even if they seem clear, and make sure you get that info for them ASAP!!

Documentation is crucial. If you make an implementation decision, document it. If you have a delivery, document it. If you have a process for anything, make sure you document it. If you have a meeting, get those notes out. If you have an agreement with stakeholders, make sure you get it in writing and get them to sign off on it!! Information is key to helping other people understand what you are doing, why you are doing it, what the expectations were from other related parties when you started doing it, and how it can be improved if needed. If you're a project lead or manager, start a folder or repository somewhere for all project communications, keep all your emails & slacks with stakeholders (because they will come back being snotheads and you can politely whip out receipts). :3

Be proactive. Observe the kinds of questions leadership asks, understand their concerns & needs. Then proactively make sure you are addressing those things in your work and/or in your reporting. For example, if you're reporting on a release failure in a weekly business review, make sure you call out things like: 1) what you tried to do to prevent failure, 2) what the ultimate blockers or root causes of failure were, 3) what your learnings were from that failure, 4) what you are going to do to fix it, and 5) what the revised ETA is. That way, even though things didn't go your way, leadership understands you are on top of things and proactively working to solve problems.

Understand priorities & tradeoffs. There will come a time where you have conflicting demands on your time. Work with your manager or org leadership to understand what projects are higher priorities than others, and do not be afraid to escalate to your manager or above if progress is threatened or if you need to clarify. For example, Project A is high priority and Project B is medium priority, but the project manager from Project B is all up in your business asking you to deliver something or investigate something that you don't know if you have time for. Loop in your manager to determine if someone else can take Project B, or inform them that doing B will impose these anticipated risks to A; are they comfortable with that? Then you can circle back to Project B to deliver the news that you're working on A, your manager has suggested this revised timeline or other POC they can work with, and if they have concerns they can escalate. (Usually this shuts ppl up :3)

Improve processes. I cannot emphasize this enough but try to think about how to do things better the next time around, even if things went solidly to plan. Do not get defensive about your work or the quality of your work; always be thinking (or asking other people) about how time could be cut off of something, what processes could be put in place to minimize touchpoints or decrease risks. If you can, try to impose this mindset on your team & ask for project retrospectives, and take specific action items out of those retrospectives! Trust me it makes things so much clearer and easier in the long run if you work to make things better over time!!

Get a mentor. Find someone who has the job you want to have or who seems to know the things you want to know about and ask them to work with you on that! Tell them what your goal is, whether to develop a special skill set to move roles, or develop a specific understanding of a project or concept, and ask them to help you develop a plan to get there. Set up regular time together and goals to work towards in that time. This helps you learn things faster and gives you someone who can vouch for you when it comes time for yearly feedback, role changes, or promotions.

Create a personal portfolio. Keep track of all the things that you do; all the projects you are on, what your role is, what you were responsible for delivering, and what resources you created as part of that, whether it's project wikis, some script, etc. Keep your manager aware of it so they understand your value and have visibility on your work; you can leverage this when it comes time for role changes or promotions. Additionally try to make sure you're working on high viz or high value projects; this gives you even more leverage!!

Do not tie your self worth to your performance or your job title. At the end of the day capitalism sucks, corporations are evil, and none of this shit matters. Even if you don't do something well once, you can improve in the future, and even if your company doesn't see it/isn't a good match for your skills, you have value!!! They profit from keeping you underpaid, stressed out, and dejected, but you are not just a 'resource' or a cog in a machine. You are a person; you will make missteps from time to time but you bring more value to this planet and the people on it just by existing than these capitalist enterprises could ever. Do do not burn yourself out trying to please them, keep yourself open to other job options, and make sure you have a good friend/family support structure in place to reality check you!!

Idk how helpful this was but I hope there was a little something in there that your friend could use. If she has specific questions on anything I'm happy to help out too lol; that might give me more idea what specific aspect she is struggling with & how to help!

[mayflowers515]

(Wholesome Cartoon AU) Smiling Critters' Families

Wanted to make this to go more into depth with the Critters' families and their thoughts on them. I mentioned some aspects about some families already in my lore headcanons, but here the information relating to them will be more organized and may have some extra details not brought up before.

Note: For the purposes of cartoon logic, real-life lifespans of animals won't apply here when it comes to the parents (since their ages are definitely beyond what ages they typically live by-)

I also have headcanons for all the families, and I will update this if I think up more for them :)

🧡☀️DogDay☀️🧡

Members:

NoonHound - father; 32 years old

Bio: Works as a cartoonist and is very passionate and easygoing.

DandieDawn - mother; 31 years old

Bio: Works as a daycare teacher; she is very caring but a bit of a worrywart.

DogDay - older brother; 11 years old

SunnySpot - younger sister; 6 years old

Bio: Filled with endless curiosity and bubbly charm, but can be a smart allec sometimes.

DogDay loves his parents a lot and respects all of what they do for him and his sister. He only wishes they could all spend more time all together. That doesn't happen too often due to his mother and father working busy jobs. As for DogDay's relationship with Sunny, he cares a lot about her, too. Sometimes, he can get a bit too overprotective of her in cases where it may not be needed. Even then, he likes to play games with her whenever she asks about it. She's very playful after all.

DogDay's parents, Noon and Dawn, work a lot to care for him and Sunny. They used to all live in a more drab town where the job quality wasn't the best. They stayed there to improve their financial situation until finally they could move to a better town to work better jobs. Though they can still be busy at times, the parents now have much more initiative to take a break compared to before. As for Sunny, she really looks up to and admires her brother. Though she gets annoyed whenever he overly coddles her, and she occasionally plays smart with him.

Headcanons:

Sunny has learned how to solve a Rubik's cube at a young age. In general she is good with completing brain puzzles, but solving a Rubik's cube is her favorite one.

Dawn's experiences as a teacher is part of the reason for being a worrywart. Due to the way the kids at daycare act, she tends to have this persona of her slip whenever she tends to DogDay and Sunny. She is often out of work very exhausted and tense, but she still loves her job.

As a kid, Noon drew cartoons as he has always wanted to be a cartoonist. However, he doesn't really like looking back at them since he views them as "cringy". If his kids were to see the comics he created, he would laugh at them as a way of acknowledging how "cringy" his previous work was, even if this may not have been the case.

Dawn and Noon have known each other for a long time, as they were next-door neighbors in their childhood town (not the same as the drab town I described, though). They were childhood friends for a long time, but Noon had harbored feelings for Dawn for a long time even before they got together. By the time their high school's prom came around, he confessed his feelings for her, which she reciprocated (turns out she felt the same way Noon did, but he was oblivious to this thinking she was just being shy originally).

Dawn's hobby whenever she isn't working is landscape work. This ranges from gardening to decorating. She gets really into it, too, often taking a long time to finish her landscaping work to fit a certain occasion (especially the case when holidays roll around). Noon likes to help with decorations sometimes because of his own passions relating to drawing.

DogDay's appreciation of his father's drawings is also what makes him so interested of other people's art, even though he himself isn't as artistic of a person.

🩷🍎PickyPiggy🍎🩷

(I'm changing my mind about the status of Picky's parents. They never disappeared now- I didn't like the original idea I had for them looking back at it; may put what I planned for them previously in another timeline though, but I'm not sure atm)

Members:

PerfectPiggy - father; 36 years old

Bio: The main cook of the family's kitchen; has good leadership skills and charisma.

PetitePiggy - mother; 34 years old

Bio: The co-cook and gardener of the family's kitchen; not afraid to get messy and is hard-working.

PickyPiggy - older sister; 10 years old

PerkyPiggy - younger twin sister; middle; 7 years old

Bio: Takes a lot after her mother and loves outdoor activity. She and her twin brother commonly bicker.

PowerPiggy - younger twin brother; middle; 7 years old

Bio: Though very reserved, he is stubborn and goal-oriented. He and his twin sister commonly bicker.

PlayPiggy - baby brother; youngest; 6 months old

Bio: A very happy infant who loves to play games.

Picky has a lot of respect for her parents. They were the reason she has such a passion in gardening and especially cooking. As a result, Picky is a bit closer with Perfect than Petite, but she is always enthusiastic at both learning new recipes and growing new crops. She has learned a lot about responsibility and discipline from them that reflects in the piggy she is. Picky has a motherly attitude towards her siblings. Whenever her parents can't take care of them due to being busy, Picky usually volunteers to help. She is a peacemaker to her siblings if Perky and Power get into fights or whenever Play starts to get upset. She also caters a lot to their basic needs. She doesn't deny any of them for any reason, though she can sometimes act slightly mean and sarcastic towards them depending on her mood. She usually apologizes when she goes too far with this attitude, however.

Picky's parents love all of their children equally. In the case of Picky, they are especially happy that she takes interest in their work. They secretly want Picky to help run the business with them when she's older, and potentially even inherit it if and when they retire. As for Picky's siblings, they have a lot of respect for their older sister. Especially because of what she does to make sure they get taken care of whenever their parents can't help for whatever reason. Perky and Power usually have Picky play with them when she can because she can also let loose and play with them just like any sister can. Though not much is known with how Play feels about Picky due to being so young, he appreciates her company just as much as everyone else's. He especially loves the games she plays with him.

Headcanons:

Before their start as a local restaurant business, the Piggies took their food service slow. They helped out in any food drives and potlucks they came across. Their favorite place to help out is in homeless shelters and orphanages. Picky especially likes to help out in the orphanage (I imagine this is how she and Bobby met all that time ago).

Both Perfect and Petite were into cooking, and they naturally took interest in each other when realizing during high school that they both planned to go to culinary school. During their time in culinary school, they fell in love and eventually became a couple.

Perky and Power aren't into cooking as much as their older sister or their parents, but they still occasionally help out in the kitchen, especially if it involves their favorite food. They can't help out in the same room, however, since they bicker even in the kitchen.

Perky is VERY messy whenever she helps out in the kitchen. She often has flour and ingredients all over her clothes after helping out. This would annoy Power, who is much less messy in the kitchen.

Whenever Power is in the kitchen, he is very by the book. He does a good job keeping track with the details explained in the cookbooks, but he will question whenever something goes against what he expects would happen.

Perfect sometimes cooks the food he makes for the restaurant business as a surprise for the family. To save money, they usually eat store bought food whenever those surprise days don't happen.

Petite probably has a lot of injuries due to what she has to work with in her garden. She especially hates wasps since they sting her a lot whenever she tends to the garden.

🩵🌈CraftyCorn🌈🩵

Members:

King SpeQuine - father; 41 years old

Bio: A very demanding presence in the kingdom and always strives to receive the best in everything.

Queen PrisMare - mother; 38 years old

Bio: Known to be emotionally distant and no-nonsense. She cares a lot about keeping the kingdom afloat.

(Princess) CraftyCorn - daughter; 11 years old

Crafty's relationship with her parents is... complicated to say the least. While she doesn't hate either of them, she doesn't exactly respect them either. They always talked down to her for interests that didn't relate to royalty and they also talked badly about anybody that didn't share their status, and Crafty disliked that. Despite this, Crafty always tried to please her parents so she could feel accepted by them. She was often talked down to for not fulfilling their expectations. Eventually, Crafty had enough of this and ran away in the middle of the night. She was accompanied by a knight who took pity in her situation. She doesn't like talking about her parents ever since she ran away from them. This is also the reason why she's so sensitive on the topic of her upbringing.

Crafty's parents didn't really love their daughter as a daughter. Rather as someone that could help them with the kingdom's reputation. They always nitpicked her for not fulfilling the visions they wanted for her to be. SpeQuine would especially be more nitpicky with his daughter. PrisMare is the same, but she has a sense of coldness whenever she does the same thing. Mainly because she doesn't know how to show love in the traditional sense, since she was always so focused on her kingdom and her kingdom only. These attitudes caused Crafty to run away. Not much is known about the parents' reaction to Crafty besides the fact they are desperately trying to search for her, unaware of her current location.

Headcanons:

Queen PrisMare actually used to be a big artist as a young girl, but she was bashed for these interests in a similar manner that Crafty was. PrisMare herself doesn't realize her own hypocrisy because there was a point in her life where her family would convince her that art was nothing but a waste of time. She commonly uses those experiences to convince Crafty to do what she and SpeQuine want her to do. Even so, I feel deep down, she would've secretly been proud of Crafty and her artwork, but doesn't show it so she can be a "good example" of "proper royalty".

King SpeQuine grew up in a rich family that spoiled him rotten before getting married to PrisMare. He was always taught that he always deserved the best of the best at all times, even if that realistically couldn't always happen. Due to the way he was raised, if he wasn't getting into a relationship with PrisMare, he would've stayed with his parents and never got a chance to work. His parents didn't care about the severity of running a kingdom at the time. They only cared that their son got with a royal because of the reputation it gives them.

Though they aren't seen or heard of much in the events of the cartoon, there are implications that the finding of their daughter is getting more widespread. These implications would grow more and more as the cartoon goes on (probably during a point where Crafty is going through an arc).

The natures of both PrisMare and SpeQuine also caused them to clash and not have as healthy of a relationship with each other either. They hid this from Crafty as much as they could to set a good example for her.

The only reason the parents got together at all is because PrisMare was pressured by her family to find someone to marry for their kingdom and SpeQuine's parents wanted him to marry a rich lady to upgrade their own status. Both PrisMare and SpeQuine seldom treat each other like married couples typically do. They may have a slight hint of care for each other, but this never extends to true love.

💛⭐KickinChicken⭐💛

Members:

CooperRooster - father; 40 years old

Bio: A social butterfly who likes to live in the moment. Can get too over his head at times, though.

WendyHen - mother; 39 years old

Bio: A sweet but self-conscious hen who wants the best for her family.

StrikinChicken - older brother; 17 years old

Bio: He is generally chill and agreeable. He likes to tease Kickin a lot, but he also likes helping him.

KickinChicken - younger brother; 10 years old

Kickin doesn't show it around others, but he is very clingy to his parents. He is especially clingy towards Cooper since he often spoiled him and his brother ever since they were young. Despite not being as close with Wendy, he still appreciates her a lot and usually tries to help her when she has her episodes of self-doubt. As much as Kickin looks up to both of his parents, however, it doesn't compare to the amount of admiration he has for his brother, Strikin. They have always been really close, and Kickin wants to be as cool as his brother. He worries whenever he feels he can't reach Strikin's level of cool, but Strikin usually reassures him whenever he feels this way.

Kickin's parents care a lot about their son, but they deep down worry a lot about him. He was picked on a lot at a previous school he was at, and they feel Kickin gets a lot of his own hidden self-consciousness from those experiences. As a result, they reassure Kickin that he will always be a star to them. Strikin also feels this way, but he is very close to Kickin. He checks up on him a lot, and he feels bad whenever he feels he couldn't do much to help him with his doubts, even when Kickin is just happy Strikin was there for him at all. Deep down, Strikin worries about how Kickin will feel once he leaves for college...

Headcanons:

Strikin plans to major in engineering once he graduates high school and goes to college.

Cooper used to be in a garage band when he was younger. He still has a rock guitar reminding him of those times. He hopes one of his sons pick up on his skills sometime.

Wendy likes to scrapbook in her free time. She may also have some embarrassing photos of her sons when they were really young. Strikin doesn't really mind, but Kickin would absolutely get embarrassed if his mom ever showed anyone those photos-

Wendy and Cooper had BIG crushes on each other during high school, but neither one of them knew about it.

When they did get together, I imagine it happened in a really funny, coincidental fashion. Like, when they were teens, they took part in a spin-the-bottle game, and Cooper just so happened to land on Wendy, which she was TERRIFIED about at first because she thought she would be way out of Cooper's league yet he still pursued her. They hit it off ever since that night-

Though I wouldn't be able to straight out say it in the AU (since I hc the cartoon was created in the early 90s where rep wasn't exactly normalized yet), it is very much implied that Strikin is gay. Probably what made Kickin himself feel more comfortable about realizing he was bisexual (this would also be implied).

Strikin has a BIG comic book collection with comics he doesn't even read anymore. He plans to give those comics to Kickin once he moves out to college (he doesn't give it to him sooner because he wants to surprise him).

💙💡Bubba Bubbaphant💡💙

Members:

(Ben) Benvolio Bubbaphant - father; 42 years old

Bio: An outgoing, fun-loving elephant who likes seeing the bright side of things.

Bridget Bubbaphant - mother; 43 years old

Bio: A kind, calm elephant who usually likes to reminisce on the past.

Bubba Bubbaphant - son; 11 years old

Bubba cares deeply about his parents, but he hasn't always been so trusting of them. For some time (prior to the series), he thought the relationship he had with his parents was "off", as if they couldn't be his real parents due to how different they are from him (size, color, etc). Eventually he realized the reason why, and he has become much closer to them ever since. He always appreciates how much they support his academic interests, and they always strive for him to achieve the best he can. Bubba likes Benvolio's energy, but he sometimes gets annoyed when he doesn't take certain things seriously. As for Bridget, Bubba admires how calm and wise she is. They also like to reminisce on old memories together.

Bubba's parents care a lot about their son. They originally were concerned for him because he would barely open up to them at a certain point in time. Once they realized why, they took extra time in making sure they valued their son for being himself and that they would always care for him. Benvolio has always made sure to do what he could to cheer up his son whenever he felt hard on himself. Meanwhile, Bridget usually helps Bubba whenever he wants insight on certain decisions he's about to make (he wants to make sure he's doing the right thing).

Headcanons:

The reason Bubba distrusted his parents so much in the past was because of how different their genetics seemed to be. He accidentally slips up on this distrust one time when he had an argument with them. Benvolio and Bridget open up about why this is the case. It turns out they are still his real parents despite how different they seemed. Just their genetics made him turn out to not be as similar to them. This discovery was part of the reason as to why Bubba has become much more inclined to learning new things nowadays. Afterwards, he starts to trust his parents more.

This misunderstanding led to Bubba's own fear of his lack of knowledge on certain things. Benvolio and Bridget are aware of this, and always let him know that there's still a lot for him to learn and that it's normal to not know EVERYTHING. Though this doesn't personally help Bubba very much, he would appreciate the support anyway.

Benvolio was NOT good at school back in the day. However, he would barely ever get any help due to the discrimination on him being so small for an elephant. This is eventually how he met Bridget, who was the only one who would help tutor him (she also had similar problems being rejected for her differences). Though they did clash sometimes, they eventually became high school sweethearts.

Bridget had a lot of achievements for her work in school back in the day, but this wasn't capitalized on as much during the time due to the discrimination following her. They have been given much more recognition as she grew older whenever anyone found out due to their world becoming more accepting of these differences.

The Bubbaphants loved to play board games together. They don't get TOO chaotic, as to them it's all just harmless fun to them. Sometimes, Benvolio likes to be silly about the way he plays and is usually the most dramatic whenever they play.

❤️❤️Bobby BearHug❤️❤️

Members:

Beckett BearHug - adoptive father; 34 years old

Bio: A tough-looking bear who has a bleeding heart on the inside. He has fighting experience.

Barbara BearHug - adoptive mother; 33 years old

Bio: Looks snobby, but she is actually very empathetic and gentle. She is known to have a rbf.

Bobby BearHug - daughter/adopted daughter; 9 years old

Bobby loves her parents a lot. She doesn't see them for their outward flaws, but rather as the parents she wished she was born with a long time ago. The truth is, these aren't her real parents. They adopted her after she was dropped by her real parents who neglected her. Due to her previous experience with those parents, Bobby gets really scared and apologetic if she feels she is being too much with Barbara and Beckett or if she isn't good enough for them. They always give her reassurance that they love her no matter what. Bobby sees them as her real parents because of the love they've given her that she needed all along.

Barbara and Beckett care a lot about their daughter. They always wanted to have a child of their own, but they were unable to for some time. They were glad to have the opportunity to raise Bobby after realizing her situation. As a result of realizing what she went through previously, they take extra care in being as kind and reassuring to her as possible. This is so she can know that they won't leave her or neglect her like her previous parents did. They love Bobby unconditionally as if she was their biological daughter.

Headcanons:

Bobby's biological parents are Homer HoneyComb and Cara HoneyComb. They had Bobby at a young age and at the time, they weren't at all ready to have a child. They kept her anyway due to pressure from both sides of the family, but they seldom gave her any attention outside of the bare minimum. This left Bobby starved for love at a young age, and as a result, she was more clingy to them. Homer and Cara took this clinginess as an opportunity to make her a scapegoat whenever they fought and brush her off as a "nuisance". They also used it as a reason to eventually abandon her. This all happened when Bobby was at the age of 5, and she was placed in an orphanage for some time after this. When she was 7-8 years old, she finally found loving parents in Beckett and Barbara.

Beckett is heavily trained in martial arts. He someday wants to teach this skill to his daughter, but he knows she may not want to do that at this point (she doesn't like to get her hands dirty). Beckett is patient about this aspect of Bobby.

Beckett's side of the family runs a honey farm that is far from the Smiling Critters' hometown. Whenever Beckett visits his parents, he makes sure to bring back honey to share among him, Barbara, and Bobby.

Barbara and Beckett met sometime when Barbara visited Beckett's family's honey farm. They related to each other a lot due to being misunderstood by others, and they eventually fell in love as a result.

Barbara actually works as a teacher at the school the Smiling Critters go to. To avoid bias, however, she agreed to not have Bobby in the same classroom as her. She occasionally checks in on her daughter whenever she is on break to make sure she's okay during the day.

Barbara and Beckett allows Bobby to visit the orphanage sometimes due to her positive experience with the fellow orphans there before getting adopted.

💚⚡Hoppy Hopscotch⚡💚

Members:

Scott Hopscotch - father; 36 years old

Bio: Passionate and a little aggressive. He can have a bad temper at times.

Rebecca Hopscotch - mother; 36 years old

Bio: Excitable and optimistic. She can be pretty reckless outside of parenting decisions.

Harley Hopscotch - older sister; 16 years old

Bio: Reserved and a bit shy, but very protective when it comes to her family's safety.

Hoppy Hopscotch - younger sister; middle; 10 years old

Holly Hopscotch - younger sister; youngest; 4 years old

Bio: She is carefree and imaginative, and her innocence is still very present.

Hoppy respects her parents a lot. They usually encourage her to follow her dreams of being a sports star. In fact, she was inspired to do it because of her mom's role in sports during high school and winning many medals. Hoppy also cares a lot about her sisters, though she wishes they would be more willing to play the kind of games she wants to play. That doesn't happen often since their interests are inclined in different directions. Hoppy would get protective of them if something happened to them.

Hoppy's parents are very happy with their daughters. Specifically for Hoppy, they appreciate the amount of energy she brings to the dynamic. Also happened because of their influence and their own energy. Hoppy's sisters also look up to her in their own right. Though Harley can act very cautious with Hoppy due to how reckless she can be, she appreciates what she does whenever she doesn't feel up to doing things. Holly really looks up to Hoppy despite not being into sports like she is. Holly usually likes piggy backs from her or Harley.

Headcanons:

This family seems to have a habit of cursing. Scott and Rebecca curse often whenever they're mad (mostly for Scott) or feeling intense about something (mostly for Rebecca). Holly and Hoppy usually have to be taken out of the room so they don't pick up on their cursing habits (Harley is the only one allowed to listen). Hoppy listens in anyway, so now she has a habit of occasionally cursing just like her parents. Obviously since the Smiling Critters is intended to be a kids cartoon, the swear words aren't actually heard by the viewers. They're coincidentally and comedically blocked out by something or someone every time. Ironically, Hoppy's parents would get mad if they heard their daughter cursing (secretly a bit proud at the same time, though). She usually tries not to curse in front of them anyway, but she occasionally slips up.

Family game nights are likely very, VERY chaotic with this family... Think like that Odd1sOut Monopoly scene-

Speaking of game nights, imagining this is how Scott and Rebecca met. One time they just had a game night with their high school friends. They basically had a game respects game attitude towards each other and grew very close ever since.

Harley wants to major in English once she makes it to college.

The sweater Hoppy has wrapped around her waist was given to her by Harley as a hand-me-down. Hoppy loved it so much that she has worn it ever since it was given to her. If she were to wear it, it would likely look a bit oversized on her-

Despite Hoppy getting in on the chaos of her parents, she will usually partake in making sure Holly keeps her innocence since she's so young. Basically like a "No! Not the baby!" situation like in Amphibia whenever something that would ruin Holly's innocence is about to happen.

💜🌙CatNap🌙💜

Members:

MewZizz - father; 34 years old

Bio: A calm, quiet guy who likes to play music for anyone willing to listen.

FeLune - mother; 33 years old

Bio: The resident "crazy lady"; She has a mysterious aura, but is she really what she seems?

CatNap - son; 11 years old

CatNap isn't by his parents often, but he still shows appreciation for what they do. Sometimes he can be a little embarrassed by the antics of his mom, but he will help her with any errands she needs done. As for his dad, CatNap appreciates the music he comes up with. He occasionally stops by to see his dad perform whenever he's awake.

CatNap's parents care deeply about their son. MewZizz is worried about his son's mental state sometimes, suspicious of the fact that he sleeps so often throughout the day. Though he knows why, he sometimes tries to convince him of better ways to go about the stress. This doesn't usually work since CatNap is so convinced that he just has to stay as calm as possible through proper sleep. Meanwhile, FeLune nags CatNap out of her own worry. Also because of a lot of the many traits they share with each other... She worries about CatNap going through the same judgement she went through, but she attempts to help him whenever he feels stressed about this.

Headcanons:

FeLune had a love-at-first-sight experience with MewZizz. She was always a part of the audience watching his performances. Eventually, she mustered the courage to talk to him, and they shortly got into a relationship afterward. For MewZizz, he loved FeLune's support and the quirks she had, so he quickly fell in love with her in a similar way.

The poppy gas CatNap has as his second scent came from FeLune's side of the family. FeLune herself had to deal with poppy gas, but she managed to control it to a healthy level. However, before she did, she would often get flak for having this ability, being deemed a monster by many for having it. As a result, this affects the way she feels about her son's poppy gas. She worries a lot about if people found out about this. Little did she know, her excessive worry about it is also what drove CatNap's own fear of the others finding out about his ability.

MewZizz often played lullabies for CatNap when he was younger. CatNap has fond memories of these lullabies, and he even hums them himself whenever he helps put others to sleep.

MewZizz and FeLune are very openly romantic in public. They do a lot of PDA, and sometimes this gets on CatNap's nerves because of how openly they do it.

FeLune was able to have their home installed with their own observatory. Besides his own bedroom, CatNap finds the observatory to be his favorite place to unwind.

(Phew... This took so long to make with the designs and descriptions =v=' I'm sorry for not posting about the AU in a while. I hope this makes up for it- Also tried to not be exactly the same as the existing family dynamics other people came up with for their own interpretations of the Smiling Critters- It's their original OCs after all- I did still get inspired by some things. If anyone has an issue with this, let me know and I'll work something out with my own characters since I don't want to copy off of anyone T^T)

Hope you guys enjoyed this (long) post!

🩷❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜

[sweatertheman]

to me, a really emotionally effective suselle denial is worth more than 10 suselles, because itd do wonders for noelle's arc, pull the themes of rejecting fate into focus, and illustrate a great point about how we play matchmaker with these characters, and how everyone else does too.

literally everyone seems to be gunning for susie and noelle to end up together, but the one person whose feelings about this pairing we've been ignoring, and the one person whose feelings actually matter, is susie! no one gave her a choice here! noelle didn't give susie a choice, she's incredibly possessive of susie and feels like she is owed information about susie, which she can then use to get susie to like her. noelle won't stop until susie is hers. ralsei never asked susie if she enjoyed her ferris wheel ride, or how she felt about noelle, he just watched from a distance and assumed how she felt, because it suits his deterministic worldview. rudy never asked susie if she wanted to go out with noelle, iirc, he just assumed she would say yes, because he loves noelle, and wants noelle to be happy. everyone else is just imposing roles onto susie, the same as they always have!

and while in the real world, having a gay lover is an act of defiance against oppressive social norms, in the world of deltarune, its the opposite! no one is telling her she can't, and everyone wants her to (with the exception of catti, and the couple asshole classmates). even if susie DOES have feelings for noelle, those feelings are sullied by the fact that everyone is still removing her agency, STILL telling her who she is and isn't allowed to be! would you still like your partner if you learned they had done everything in their power to make sure you would end up with them? obsessively collecting information on you in order to seem more appealing, constructing situations for you to meet up in a way where it seems organic, trying to get closer to you by any means necessary? i don't think susie would.

the thing susie seems to value most out of anything is her own agency in choosing what she gets to do, and how she gets to do it. no societal norm, social convention, narrative trope or gameplay mechanic stands in her way of choosing what she wants to do. she won't let you take her armor off unless you give her something else. when you give her a more powerful weapon, she won't accept a weaker one. she's too good for that. susie can dance on her own if she wants, she isn't stupid. it's not fair that kris gets to make all the choices, so its her turn now. heal prayer is boring, so she makes up her own spell. she challenges the idea that darkners are a slave race because she wouldn't want to be complicit in such a system. she believes they should be free to make their own choices. in what world would a person who values freedom above all be happy knowing that their partner wasn't going to let them make their own choice? this isn't even a question of whether or not susie likes noelle, its a question of if susie would be okay knowing that noelle feels, however unconsciously, as if susie belongs to her in some way. and i believe the answer is no.

and this rejection would hurt regardless of if susie liked noelle back, because we do like noelle, flawed as she is. and that rejection forces noelle to change in some way. either she accepts that susie's freedom to choose means the freedom not to be with her, or she doubles down and tries to win her over. she doesn't get what she wants, so she has to choose to get better and start seeing susie as a person, and not merely an idol, or a fantasy, or she has to choose to get worse, and cling onto susie harder.

my rejection of suselle is only somewhat about susie's feelings towards noelle, and is mostly about susie's freedom to not have those feelings, a freedom which is being violated by the "narrative" she exists in, the "Legend of DELTA RUNE"

she deserves a choice, and when the person in question, noelle, doesn't seem to care about how she feels, and only wants susie to be hers, i think she'll choose no, even if she did really like noelle. maybe even especially if she really liked noelle. people talk about how betrayed susie will feel learning kris is possessed and darkners are objects, but what about when she learns noelle was willing to change herself to be whatever susie wants, was willing to treat friends poorly, to almost stalk her, just to make her hers? would she be able to trust her feelings for noelle learning that it was all out of her control, that she hadn't been given a choice?

this isn't even to say they won't end up together in the end. its just to say it can't be like this. it cant be with a noelle who doesn't really respect susie's personhood and sees her more as an object whose affection must be won, and it can't be by the will of a divine entity that orchestrated everything for susie to end up with her. it has to be susie's choice.

this is kind of why i like ralsusie. what better way to make a display of your agency than to reject literally everything others have coaxed you into? rejecting the prophecy, rejecting noelle's advances, rejecting the player's agency, rejecting the concept of darkners not being real people.

its not like she can only choose to be the bully no one likes or the hero protector who ends up with noelle. its a false dichotomy, where fate locks her up and offers an escape, but the "escape" is only another cell. true escape is carving your own path, playing by your own rules.

[cantstoplovingjude]

Underneath the Black Veil: Harrison Gray Ch.1

This is from Ikemen Villains EN, Cybird owns everything.

My boyfriend, Harry, had a hard time waking up in the morning.

And as his girlfriend, it fell to me to make sure he got up.

(I knew it. He's still fast asleep.)

A half-finished mystery novel lay on top of rumpled bedsheets. He'd obviously stayed up pretty late reading it.

He looked so innocent while fast asleep, a part of me wanted to just watch him for a while longer. Alas...

Kate: "Harry? Morning sleepyhead, it's time to get up."

Harrison: "...Nn?"

He blearily cracked one eye open.

(Ah, he's awake.)

Or so I thought.

Kate: "Woah- Harry!"

He reached out to grab me and pulled me close, his face nuzzling into my shoulder.

Harrison: "Just a few more minutes..."

(Oh, he's still half-asleep...)

Harry didn't usually act like this when he was awake, so seeing him be so cute while he was half-asleep made me really happy.

Harrison: "You're so warm... it feels real nice."

(He's so cute... It wouldn't hurt to let him sleep a little while longer, right?)

Victor: "Gooood morning, Harry! Oh, Kate, what a surprise, you have such perfect timing!"

Kate: "V-Victor?! When did you get in here?!"

Victor: "I'll have you know that I did knock first."

Victor: "Well, aren't you two looking as cozy as a bug in a rug! Make a guy feel lonely, why don't you? Ohhh, let me join!"

Victor: "Clear the way, I'm jumping in~! Alley-oop!"

Harrison & Kate: "Woah!"

Harrison: "Huh...? The heck are you two doing in my bed?"

All the commotion had finally woken him up. After quickly explaining the situation, I turned to Victor.

Kate: "So I assume there's a reason why you've stopped by?"

Victor: "Correct, my dear! I am pleased to inform you that the two of you are getting married!"

Harrison: "Huh?"

Kate: "Pardon?"

I was pretty used to Victor's chaotic antics at this point, but marriage? I wasn't quite sure how to react.

Harrison: "All right, I'm sure you have a reason for this, right? So let's hear it."

Victor: "Have you heard of the organization called Amour? They claim to support people in their search for everlasting love."

Harrison: "Ah, yeah, I think I've heard of them."

Harrison: "I've heard that couples are throwing themselves at them, convinced that they've got a real shot at that everlasting love, or something."

Victor: "Fantastic, I knew I could count on you, Harrison!"

Victor: "And here's where it gets interesting. There's been cases of couples who've gone to Amour turning up dead. Quite a few, in fact."

Kate: "Do you have any idea who the culprits might be?"

Victor: "William and I are investigating the matter."

Victor: "We currently believe the culprit to be a member of the organization, who claims to the founder."

Harrison: "So what's this guy's motive? Money?"

Victor: "Precisely. All of the couples killed were due to be wed and were preparing for their future together."

Victor: "Whether it was for a new home, or a new addition to their family, they had all saved up a considerable amount of money. And THAT'S what he was after."

(I can't believe he's targeting all of these innocent couples.)

Kate: "There has to be another reason why you haven't directly confronted this man, am I correct?"

Victor: "Amour only holds weddings for couples who profess their love for each other."

Victor: "It's quite a special ceremony, said to grant everlasting love to those who participate. And it is for that ceremony only that our man will show himself."

Harrison: "So what you're saying is that you need a couple to lure him out. Which makes us perfect for the job."

Victor: "Exactly! But's it's not all doom and gloom, you know!"

Victor: "Kate, you'll get the chance to wear a beautiful-fake-wedding dress, and hear Harrison swear his everlasting love to you!"

(Harry and I getting married, huh...?)

The faint idea danced around in my head.

Kate: "I know we're only doing it so we can get close to Amour, but... the idea is a little exciting, I'll admit."

Victor: "You get it!"

But just as my imagination began to spin all sorts of ideas about a wedding with Harry...

Harry didn't look so enthused.

Harrison: "You sure about this?"

Kate: "Huh?"

Harrison: "I mean, it's good that you're up for this either way."

Harrison: "The fact Victor's here telling us about this means we don't have any choice in the matter at this point, right?"

Victor: "Correct. This is an order directly from Her Majesty the Queen."

Harrison shrugged and heaved a small sigh of resignation.

Victor: "Now give into the darkness of your wicked hearts."

==========

The carriage swayed as we made our way to the church Amour used as their base of operations.

But my thoughts were a million miles away. Harry's words from earlier stuck out in my mind.

(Am I sure about this...? Well, of course I am. But still...)

(Maybe I did let my imagination get a little carried away.)

Harrison: "If you keep staring into space like that, I might just have to kiss you, you know."

Kate: "Oh, sorry!"

I jumped at the sound of Harry's voice next to me. He smirked and began to play with my hair.

Harrison: "I mean, spacing out is fine and all, but let's act a bit more like a couple, yeah?"

According to Victor, we had to declare our love for each other for Amour to hold their special wedding ceremony for us.

And if they didn't believe it, we'd be turned away at the door.

(I have to pull my own weight if I want to do my job properly as Fairytale Keeper.)

(Okay, look sharp, Kate!)

==========

Follower: "Welcome to Amour!"

(Oh, wow...)

We were greeted by the gentle smiles of several people all dressed in the same pure white.

Follower: "And why have come to visit us today?"

Harrison: "I was told that if we had our wedding ceremony at this church, we would be granted everlasting love."

Harry wrapped an arm around my waist to pull me close, and let out a passionate sigh.

Harrison: "I fell in love with her at first sight. It wasn't an easy road, but after confessing several times, she finally agreed to go out with me."

(Wait, wh-?!)

Harrison: "Every minute of every day, my thoughts are filled with nothing but her. I can't imagine a life without her."

Harrison: "And so, I find myself here at my wit's end."

As I stood there, dumbfounded at Harry's ardent confession, one of the followers turned to look at me.

Follower: "I see, I see. And what about you, young lady?"

(Oh, right!)

Kate: "I-I... I feel the same! I love him with all my heart, and I want to be with him forever!"

(Shoot, my voice just shot up about an octave there...)

Harrison: "You have no idea how happy I am, Kate. I feel like the luckiest guy in the world right now..."

Harrison: "Come here, you."

Kate: "H-Harry!"

End Ch.1

[chaos-lioness]

Happy Rosh Hashana guys have some marker experiments with my new favorite Jewish character of all time, Brian Jeeter. And Krejjh!!! ID below, lengthy design decision ramblings below that :)

[ID: A marker drawing of Krejjh and Jeeter from The Strange Case of the Starship Iris. Jeeter is a light-skinned human with short curly hair. Krejjh is an alien with four arms and mid-length hair in elaborate braids. They are lying on a mattress together with their arms and legs overlapping, partly covered by a blanket. Krejjh is face down and their limbs are spread out across most of the mattress. They are drawn in purple. Jeeter is face up and smiling slightly in his sleep, and drawn in blue. He has visible top surgery scars and oxygen tubing leads from under his nose to a machine beside the mattress. Also on the floor are two pager-like devices, a pile of notes and books, and a tablet showing two figures in elaborate hats. END ID]

Marker test number two has been marginally successful!! Still trying to figure out how best to get a degree of smoothness. My main regret with this is Krejjh’s sleeping position honestly. ‘Krejjh is exhausted flops face down and takes up the whole bed’ is, I maintain, a hilarious idea. But now we can’t see them smiling back at Jeeter! Their fancy braids are supposed to be a Dwarnian thing, I wanted to give them something appearance wise that could have cultural significance. I figured Dwarnians might have a variety of hair textures just like humans, so I wanted to go with something that works similarly for lots of different types of hair. I have them on a mattress to drive home the makeshift way they’re using the new ship (I intended this to be set mid season 2). The stuff on the floor is supposed to be coms, linguistics research, and everyone’s favorite Dwarnian soap. Also, big thanks to @high-voltage-rat for answering my hopefully spoiler free vague questions, this was a good drawing to have a resident Biomed Person for! Believe it or not a lot of work went into figuring out where Krejjh’s extra arms should go that would not have been possible without her anatomy textbooks and well-informed suggestions. (The muscles for the bottom arms are upside-down versions of the musculature in human shoulders (and Krejjhs’s top arms) if anyone was wondering. Also the bone structure is behind their digestive organs, so their stomach pokes out more than a human’s… which you could also see if I chose their sleeping position better. Alas.) Also for telling me enough that I could Google the right words to figure out an oxygen tank but Future but like the Right Amount of future. (The nose piece is name dropped so I left that pretty much unchanged, but rat said you’d usually need pressurization at night so the ‘tank’ is a little more flexible and technologically advanced than what we have right now in the real world. So it can act like a cpap and it squishes but you still gotta lug it around, keeping it nice and cannon aligned.) Finally, they’re so uh. Scantily covered because the ship is allegedly kept at 37 degrees… which for a while I thought was Celsius but maybe it’s Fahrenheit?? Anyway. 37 Celsius is really warm. So. It was the only logical way.

[bandzboy]

I need everyone to see what’s really going on here because I’m not going to let this slide quietly. Shame on you. Shame on every single person on that list who thought it was okay to gang up on me and bully me into taking down my post. I spoke up about the harmful behavior that’s been poisoning this fandom, and instead of reflecting on that, you all decided to prove my point by attacking me. You think you’ve silenced me, but all you’ve done is show everyone exactly what you’re made of.

I came to this community to share my love for Seventeen, just like everyone else, but it’s become clear that some people here are more interested in creating drama and tearing others down than in supporting the boys. The way you and your so-called friends banded together to bully me into silence is exactly the kind of toxic behavior that’s ruining Caratblr. You’ve shown your true colors, and they’re ugly. What does it say about you that instead of addressing the real issues I brought up, you chose to attack me instead? It says that you don’t care about the truth, and you don’t care about the well-being of this fandom. All you care about is protecting your fragile egos and keeping up this charade of being ‘real fans’ when your actions prove otherwise.

You didn’t just hurt me with your bullying; you hurt the entire community by showing that anyone who dares to speak up about the issues here will be met with hostility and cruelty. You didn’t silence me—you only made me more determined to speak out. You’ve shown everyone watching just how toxic this fandom can be, and that’s on you, not me. You think you’ve won by forcing me to take down my post, but all you’ve done is expose yourselves as the bullies you are. Shame on you for thinking that you could get away with this without anyone noticing. Shame on you for proving every point I made in that post by turning against me in the way that you did.

This isn’t just about me. It’s about every Carat who’s been silenced by people like you, who think they can control the narrative by bullying others into submission. You’ve shown everyone what kind of people you really are, and there’s no coming back from that. Shame on you.

bold of you to say all of this truly but i am gonna point some things out real quick 1) you said you are not "not gonna let this slide quietly" and yet you are on anon AGAIN like you were behind an account made for the sole purpose of calling out a group of people that just have morals and opinions 2) you claimed we bullied you? it's interesting because my friends and i weren't the ones who made a list to target people and to possibly rally others to boycott our content and essentially put a target on our backs.

for the second (and last time i hope) you don't know me personally or you don't know any of my friends and mutuals that you put in your stupid list. you don't get to talk to me like you have it all figured it out when you truly haven't. all i am doing on tumblr right now is my part and sharing information about things going on in the world. you claim to call out "real issues"? please don't make me laugh. i don't know you either but i would assume that the way you are acting is because you are possibly insecure that you don't have a solid belief system and kpop is getting the best of you. us saying we don't like certain svt songs don't exactly affect your life. us saying that svt shouldn't collab with certain people because those said people aren't good and have a history of being awful is not a bad thing... that is called having a brain and having intact morals. me saying we should boycott hybe because of their continuous support and promotion of zionism by employing zionists and letting their artists collab with them is valid especially in our world's current climate. idk if you noticed... there's a genocide going on and people are dying because of this ideology.

i could explain why palestinian fans decided to organize this boycott to begin with but i can see this is useless because you aren't willing to listen. so i'll just say this: stop harassing people because you don't agree with their opinions and you possibly aren't healthily stanning svt. it's not our fault and we are confident about our beliefs and how we support them. you on the other hand may not be. so, i'm just asking you to reflect and leave us alone

[14dyh]

17 from the new list? hange getting rejected

Get Over Her | H.Z.

Pairing: Hange Zoë x gn!reader Summary: You helped Hange get over their rejection. Word count: 1.0k A/N: sorry anon i can't write about y/n themself rejecting hange so this happened :"")

It would have been impossible for you to miss it when Hange acts strangely– even for themselves. Being roommates for over a year, you've known how they take their coffee differently in the morning, never miss checking on Science Daily to tell you something fascinating, or how their footsteps sound when they're trying not to wake you up at night. 

You know Hange. 

Their pain wouldn't pass over your eyes and the way they ruminate in an excruciating manner that you're starting to feel the headache for them. It began with the rejection that happened weeks ago. Hange just came home, throwing over the flowers they failed to give in an empty bin and refused to say anything other than they got rejected, that's all, just kinda unfortunate this time, right? You knew better and recognized right away how the rejection slowly deteriorates them from the inside, even if they're trying to laugh it off by dousing those flowers with an organic-based chemical that speeds up the composting process (as Hange happily announced to you). At some point, you had to try and rip them away from that cruel cycle of never admitting their pain. Sometimes you would spend hours in the arcade, pull them along the quiet garden on the riverside to watch ducks, or watch plays and movies until you both pass out on the couch. From those moments, you managed to glimpse the sparkle in their eyes again which they lost a day later after seeing her. 

You want to shake Hange into reality and yell at them to get over her. But how can you manage to do such a thing when she looks like everything Hange had hoped for? 

She would pass by the hallway and everyone's attention would be stirred. Her grace and fragrance, or how she managed to stand out like a fascinating flower among a field of others. She was what Hange hoped to be the perfect opposite of their ideal paradox. But now they couldn't stand or act like themself whenever in the same room as her or not until they decided to space out and let their ideas absorb them. There were times that they would remain silent in school, but you knew that the sound of their thoughts was getting louder and louder to bear.

You were both in your dorm, studying in the dead of the night when they asked, "Hey Y/N? Do I sound annoying?" And it sounded more like a question out of curiosity than self-deprecation. 

"Well, not really..." you responded. 

"Not really? What does that mean?"

"I mean, why would you ask me? If ever you're annoying, I'll be the first one to get used to it so don't think I would mind that anymore,” you explained, sitting up from your bed as you tried to meet their eyes. Hange’s gaze remained far away. 

"So maybe I do sound annoying..." they pondered loudly before turning to you and continuing. "Was it my voice?"

Hange continued on and on, asking and piecing together information on that topic.

And you were getting tired and hurt from the inside as they thought that maybe their voice was annoying, or their humor, or their hobbies. You nudged their swivel chair with your foot. 

"Hey, stop that now. Why don't we go out? Maybe a midnight stroll or a snack. Anything to stop you from that nonsense."

You pulled them out of those thoughts again, taking the streets at midnight to walk around and get something to eat. To talk about anything else other than their rejection because you know it would make them break. The night faded into a deep dark blue and it was 2 AM. You forgot how you both ended up on the couch, drinking away your thoughts as Hange laid their head on your shoulder. They rambled on about funny anecdotes and fascinating theories that would concern anyone, and then they quieted for a moment before saying, "You know... I grew the flowers I wanted to give to her."

Hange only smiled before finally turning to you, "Heh, I like the sound of that."

They said in a quiet voice as though raising it any higher would cause them to break down. 

Then they chuckled before saying, "Those flowers were a cross-hybrid. And when I showed her, she said it looked like a weird sack of balls and I said noooo, it wasn't quite like that. It's supposed to symbolize how the sun dips on the fabric of space..."

They went on drunkenly, arms around you now as they leaned closer as if any attempt they would make to move away would result in great discomfort.

"And I thought it was a cute metaphor to relate her to the sun but... she only laughed at me. Not in a way you would laugh in amusement with my ideas. Somehow, it sounded mocking."

And that hurt, Hange's voice broke, prompting the sobs that came after. 

You held them close, a portion of your heart aching as someone made them feel ashamed of all the things you love about them. What angered you the most was that the girl never rejected them outright, maybe to keep Hange in a way to use them or entertain herself. You don't deserve any of that, your mind protested. You thought of Hange as everything wonderful that happened in this world, as all the poetry and love in your heart screamed. 

"I made a mistake... And I'm correcting that..." they muttered on your shoulder, on the verge of falling asleep. They held you tighter, their tears dripping down your shirt before they relaxed on your body. For a moment, you tried to make sense of their words, maybe they regretted falling for that girl after all and realized how much they didn’t deserve such treatment. 

As they drifted to slumber, still clung to you, your eyes found the small plant growing on Hange’s table that reminded you of the nebula you always talk about with them.

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Personality through quote

Thanks to @theprissythumbelina here and @mysticstarlightduck here!

Rules: give a quote from your OCs based on the prompt, then tag people with a new prompt!

[A quote about pets/animals]

Lexi: "Animals are so cute! I would love to get a pet one day! Not sure what I'd get though...or how much is too many... I think I can keep up with at least one dog and a cat!"

Maddie: "I can literally turn into animals. Yeah, of course they're cool. Big cats are my favorite. Did you know that cheetahs can't retract their claws? And also, the smallest tiger is the Sumatran. And also snow leopard's paws act like snowshoes? And--"

Ash: "Our house is a little crowded for an animal right now. I'm not sure how responsible I'd be with them, anyway, haha."

Gwen: "Oh, um. A few months ago our cat got really sick and...well there wasn't really a humane option. Um, anyways, we're not quite ready for another pet right now."

Robbie: "With my parents' schedule and me and Sammy losing track of time and everything around us, please don't get us a pet. Akash would have to take care of it, and I don't wanna do that to him."

Akash: "I would love to have a dog one day. Never had one growing up due to, well, everything going on. But I'd really like a pet one day."

Jedi: "I have always wanted a pet ferretsnake, actually. My sister wanted a kitsune. Having both would have been wonderful."

Carmen: "Atsila had Custos, and that's the closest I'll have to a pet." (She loves Custos and Custos loves her)

[A quote about their relationship with money (in the past and nowadays)]

Lexi: "I mean, I'm not suuuper familiar with how money works, but I definitely will be one day. Knowing myself, I'd probably be very organized. Whenever my mom gives me money to like buy something at school or the mall or whenever I go out with friends in general, I always budget beforehand and plan accordingly. But if I'm secure enough, I'd love to buy some clothes or supplies but also gifts for my friends!"

Maddie: "Similar to Lexi, I guess. I mean, I think I'd save up money so I can use it on big things later! A Lego set or something like that. But the patience for that sounds literally impossible."

Ash: "I am also fond of the idea of saving to splurge later. Splurging sounds fun, but you can't do it without saving unfortunately."

Gwen: "My parents have saved money for me to go to college since I was born. I think that's a noble cause. I think using money on schooling or pursuing what you care about, what your purpose is...that's good."

Robbie: "My mom has given me so many lectures about having a secured footing is important, and I get it, but man, it's hard to focus on that. I'd love to go on exciting experiences and all that. Me, Akash, Sammy, Lexi, Gwen--like all of us traveling around the world together. That sounds dope. Awesome. But Mutti says I have to save for that. I really need to focus more on her lectures. Maybe if she made a PowerPoint...."

Akash: "I am probably going to have to do Robbie's taxes and also give him financial advice. I have it in my four year plan for high school to take a semester long financial course in junior year. I plan to use that information wisely."

Jedi: "Saving money for a good cause is something I have always done. My education, Inutilia rights, the Aequales, charities. I believe money can do as much good in the world as anything else."

Carmen: "Pfft, I'm responsible with my money. I'd be an accountant if I had to [she would be miserable]. Make sure everything is paid off, then maybe spend some money on making life a little more comfortable. Like home organizers. Because some people can't seem to pick up after themselves."

Tagging @sparrow-orion-writes @talesofsorrowandofruin @writernopal @awritingcaitlin @winterandwords @drchenquill @keysandopenmind @pluppsauthor @pluto-murphy-writes @writingamongther0ses @willtheweaver @calicohyde + anyone who'd like to

Your prompt: [A quote about a hot summer day.]

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

[spaceman-earthgirl]

@itistakingover and I wrote an avatrice Switzerland fake dating au which involves Beatrice coming to terms with her feelings for Ava through some fake dating fun. Here's the first chapter.

Excerpt:

“Don’t be mad.”

They’re the first words out of Ava’s mouth when she finds Beatrice in the back of the bar, and Beatrice already knows she’s going to be mad in about three seconds.

“What did you do?”

“Listen,” Ava says, hands up in a placating gesture. “First, it wasn’t my fault, it just happened and-“

“Ava,” Beatrice cuts in.

“He just wouldn’t stop and I didn’t know what else to do but I swear, I didn’t mean to, I-“

“Ava,” Beatrice cuts in, more forceful this time. She’s getting worried, now half expecting to go out to the bar and find some guy knocked out on the floor. They can’t afford the attention if that’s the case, they can’t afford to move anywhere else, not right now.

(The thought of leaving here, leaving the home they’ve made, saddens Beatrice in a way she can’t afford to think about).

“I…” Ava’s shoulder sag and she bites her lip. “Hans thinks we’re dating.”

Of all the things Beatrice thought could’ve happened, of all the scenarios that are running through her mind and contingency plans for them all, this was not one of them.

“Hans thinks we’re…” Beatrice clears her throat before she can say the next word. “Dating?” Even then, the word comes out slightly strangled. She has to clear her throat again. “Why does Hans think we’re dating?”

“You know, Simon, one of the regulars?”

Beatrice is not following this at all but nods anyway.

“Well, he would just not stop flirting with me, he wouldn’t take the hint,” Ava starts, and suddenly Beatrice is mad, not for whatever reason Ava thought she’d be mad in the first place, but because of Simon and his inability to treat people with respect. She’s seen the way he looks at Ava, seen the way he flirts with her. More than once she’s had to stop herself stepping in and saying something.

“You’ve seen him, the way he acts sometimes, I wanted it to stop and he wouldn’t take no for an answer. I knew you wouldn’t appreciate me punching him but I also wasn’t really thinking and I just blurted out that we were dating. And Hans heard, which is now why I’m telling you, because I’ve dug us into a hole I don’t know how to get out of.” Ava chews on her bottom lip. “Are you mad?”

Beatrice sighs, trying to take in all the information and figuring out their best course of action. “I’m not mad.”

She’s not, she’s just wondering why God is testing her like this. This is not what she expected when she signed up to be a sister warrior.

Ava winces. “You seem a little mad.”

“I’m not,” Beatrice repeats. “Well, I am, but at Simon, not at you. So Hans and Simon think we’re…together?”

She’s trying to piece it together in her mind, come up with the best way out of this.

Ava nods.

“Simon won’t matter, we probably won’t see too much of him.” Especially because she’s planning to have a few words with him about respect and consent. “But Hans is a different story.” Beatrice thinks for another moment, and comes up with a solution. “We can tell him you were just lying to the customer to get him to stop.”

Ava pulls a face, and Beatrice already knows she’s not going to like whatever she says next.

“Afterwards, Hans made a comment about how we make a cute couple and I didn’t deny it.”

“Ava.”

“And then I told him you were the best and asked him if he could man the bar for a few minutes so I could come and see you. And here we are. He probably thinks we’re making out back here or something.”

Beatrice lets out a sharp breath, this is too much.