#i really hate to reblog it here especially bc of my lack of activity

[mariogoetze]

blog/important update

hey lads, with the most recent absence due to covid-19 i had a lot of time to think especially in general and about my future. in that time i also thought about tumblr and blogging and after being here for almost a decade i decided now would be the right time for some major changes. you can read them right below, thank you!

i’ve been on tumblr for a long time almost a decade if you’d like to say. i’ve had the pleasure to meet a lot of nice people, sure some encounters were here and there not nice, but most of them were very good and helped me to develop on this site. honestly back then when i joined this site i really didn’t know how it worked i used 3 different tags for the same person and i wrote in my posts 2 languages going a few sentences first with german and then switching to english afterwards. luckily i’ve met a lot of great people who’ve helped me to develop on this site and helped me to grow not only as a blogger but also as a person, which i’m really grateful for. even tho this site is a hellsite i still learned a lot of things which i was unaware of before and there were also things which i managed to develop which i’m proud of. at this moment i’d like to thank all of those who’ve helped me in the beginning and those through and through my road bc they made my journey on here really amazing filled with lots of joy and also lovely moments as well, so i’m really grateful. i’ve really experienced all kind of things here the world cup 2014 was probably one of the best ones but also emotional matches were the fandom stuck together and sometimes some wins were amazing to celebrate and there were even some defeats which made the fandom closer and let’s not start with all those memes and shit posts which made the interacting really delightful.

with more time on being here and with more inspiration and motivation i received i edited through the years and it was really great. from shitposting, to making memes and to edit pictures and to create gif it was really a hell of a blast! back then when i first joined this site i thought i’d never be able to make gifs and some years later i developed which was really a special moment for me. people telling me they enjoy my edits made me really happy and all the amount of support i received meant really a lot to me. so if you’re reading this and you’ve supported me and my work then let me tell you: thank you. it really warms my heart and i appreciate it.

but to speak now about the major changes on my blog and the update itself, let me start with saying that there are 4 major reasons why the changes will happen. let’s start of with..

1. schedule - my schedule after summer will change which means that i’ll have to work quite a lot and that won’t change anytime soon. as an editor it takes quite a lot to make actually edits (depending on what you edit and how much) and i don’t think that once i come home at 6 pm that i would like to make edits for an hour or so, if you get me? i would rather relax, listening to music, perhaps go to the gym or do something else. with my new upcoming schedule in the near future it will make it hard for me to be posting much at all as i don’t really have the time for it anymore. i dealt before quite well as i had a good balance with my studying, i will continue my studying in the future but for now i will switch to my education and hopefully in the future i will finish what i started and become a teacher.

2. fandom - interacting is one of the key things on tumblr. sure you can just make your posts and go by it i mean in the end tumblr is there to space out, i’ve been enjoying my freedom and to be able to post whatever i want whenever i want and just letting my creativity full out it was really great but nowadays i feel like more and more people are dying out on tumblr, sure they are for example nice and funny people in the bvb fandom and i do enjoy them very much but i still feel like compared to 5 years ago there is a major difference. a lot of my friends have left the fandom, those were people who inspired me to post and in general to be an active part of this fandom, sure they are still great people (shootout to all my mutuals) in it which like i said above really enjoy but i still feel like we got a lot smaller and it’s kinda less fun? i mean it’s still rolling and going but with a lot less fire than it used to be.. at this point i would like to say that i’m not trying to ruin anyone’s fun i mean if you’re still enjoying what you do then that is wonderful and please keep it up. for me the fire just got smaller and the desire has shrunken tbh. i think it’s logical tho i mean when people leave you enjoyed interacting with and also the the dynamic of the fandom changes and the club also with coaches and players it does make sense. those who are currently there are doing a good job and they kept me motivated till my last breath to keep me going so i would like to thank all my mutuals for being lovely human beings. i feel like in general you need to take more care at what you write, post and say, i mean if you for example were not happy with a certain player’s performance or in general if something bothers you, you need to watch out because there could always be someone who could hate on you for doing so and that kinda sucks.

3. favre - if you follow me for a longer period of time you will know that i was never really found of him. i don’t hate him but i do dislike him for many reasons. i personally don’t see us winning a trophy with him as he’s lacking of the mentality of some other great coaches who have won some trophies recently and in the past. for me he just doesn’t fit into the system of bvb as he gives me this ‘chicken’ scared kind of vibe. the tactic changes to play with like 3/5 defenders is something i find also quite questionable that we are not able to play with just 4 defenders and also let’s not talk about that time our players were lacking off motivation. sure it’s not all the coach who is to blame but for me he’s the major reason for a lot of questionable things, decisions and results which happened in the past. now that favre said a few days ago that he wants to continue to work with bvb and zorc said that they don’t look out for a new coach i think that totally ruins it for me.

4. favorite player - now it’s official (not like that it wasn’t obvious before) but yes mario will leave bvb. obviously my heart will always beat black and yellow, but i’m really disappointed in the way how mario is leaving. after he came back and fought of his disease he has always given his all for this club. in his playertribute he wrote how after he came back he understood more the club and how the fans feel and i totally dig that as whenever he played he always showed heart and wanted to win, especially last season when he was one of the best if not the best player who alongside other players like jadon almost made it possible to capture the bundesliga title. after that amazing 2nd leg of the bundesliga what happened afterwards? he got treated like shit. benched all over and never gotten a chance to play. after 6 games of being benched and a 1+ minute sub in the ucl at the 91′ minute he played vs bremen and guess what? he scored, he provided 3 goal chances, his pass accuracy was very high and he became man of the match. favre said he played very well and what then? he got benched again. i really hate how bvb is treating him almost like as if he was just air you know and i don’t think he deserves that, i mean he has given his all whenever he got the chance to play but to treat him like this is is just very unfair. he showed that he still has qualities and can actually play well and help the offensive but not on favre’s watch.

so now with mario leaving i don’t think i will do much edits as i used to because in general it hurts me really that he is leaving i grew up with him being in bvb as a 17 yo boy who just came from the youth. now he is rotten on the bench and gets treated like shit and his last match? well i don’t know if he will even play by the amount of time favre is benching him. but one thing is to say: once he’s gone he will find a new club and finally play again and find his happiness and that makes very happy.

but back to my blog now: one of the main reasons why i joined this site is because of mario götze, my fav club and of course the love for football, to express my feelings in a different way as you know such as edits or text posts and so on. now that mario is leaving i don’t think i will be really motivated to make edits and since my schedule and tumblr itself is changed/is changing i decided it would be the right time to take a step down.

so no i’m not leaving tumblr - i just change my blogging style and activity. i will definitely make less edits, i will probably reblog much more, i will still try do to make posts here and there (if my schedule and mood allows it and is good) but i don’t think i will be any longer the blogger i used to be for a long time on this site as i think with mario leaving bvb and also with now almost a decade of difference of tumblr and all the changes with happened on this site, the fandom itself and people leaving i think it’s fitting to make this step. i joined this site when mario left bvb and now that mario is leaving again i think my active-phase of being a football-editor is coming to an end. 

i will still be around like i said, just in a different way and style. i’ve made some great friends on here and there also a lot of nice people who i still need to get to know better and to which i look forward to! i really appreciated all the support i’ve received through out my journey and i just wanted to thank you it really always meant a lot to me! my journey is now ending now and i’ve really appreciated being able to express all my creativity and feelings for such a long time with your support you’ve always encouraged me to do even more and to feel good at what i’m doing so thank you! i look forward to my new chapter as now blogging will be different to what i’m used to but regardless i look forward to it.

i’m not ded i’m just taking a step back and i’m in the second seat row now. thank you 💛

[asillydreamer-on-a-crazyworld]

I like that they will get a divorce but I hate that is was Dean that handed it over. The last few episodes the writers are trying really hard to make Dean look like the good guy, even though he has been the worst husband ever. I hate we never got an argument about the cancer lie and it looks like it will never happen now. Dean always talks about how it is her fault that everything bad has happend, like wtf? Also I kind of had to cringe when I saw the new promo with Beth hugging Dean.

You know… I wish it was her too, just bc I would feel better watching Beth hand the papers to him. But this is me saying what I wanted, however, this is not my story, it’s Beth’s. I understand why the writers chose to not follow that path, bc I get it. She wouldn’t ask for a divorce now, bc like we saw later in that scene of her laying on a bed with Ruby and Annie by her side, her only worry was about her kids and about not having anything of hers to get from this divorce.

Where would she live if he took the house? How would she support herself and the kids? What if HE TOOK THE KIDS FROM HER? 

Like me and other ppl always talked about, Beth doesn’t have anything on her name. It’s all Dean’s. She was trying to take her own steps into life by herself again, be someone that could provide for her kids alone. Until Dean forced her to give up on this dream bc of jealousy. How could she be the one asking for a divorce now, if she just found herself in debt with Rio again? 

and look, I don’t see how this could have happened in a different way, how Beth could be the one at this point of the show to ask a divorce from Dean when they both care about the kids a lot and these children have gone through a lot lately. We know Beth would never put her children on the terrible situation of having both their parents fighting over a divorce like I think it would happen if Beth snapped and told Dean to leave.

I mean, he would probably take the kids away from her bc rn he has control of the money they have and everything else. Right now, Beth has nothing, no money, no properties, nothing on her name. How would she fight over the custody of her kids?

I know we wanna things to happen in a certain way, one that pleases us but one thing I love in this show is how even though there are a lot of crazy things and circumstances happening in the women’s lives, many things happen just like real life… Especially the relationships in this show. One proof of that is how I’ve seen posts here, some I wrote myself, about how we all related to some things that happened to these women. Hell, some even could relate to MP as well.

so, it made sense to me that, in the end, he was the one to ask for the divorce and I was glad that the first thing she asks or talks about is the kids. When she said “but I’m trying”, I don’t think she was pleading for another chance on their marriage for him, but for her kids.

That is why I loved how she went and told him she liked to have sex with Rio ( we could argue it was not bc of that at all only bc it was just 2 times but this is for another post). It must have hurt a LOT to Dean, bc I believe one thing he hated the most was the fact that Rio had Beth, more than once in his head ( well, now it is true lol). We all know he rly didn’t care for the criminal activities she was getting herself into, bc he even offered to help. U can argue with me about his motivations but we all know he really gave her an ultimatum and started talking about “Worrying for the kids’ safety” after he realized Beth and Rio had sex.

That being said, I do believe that Dean finally realized himself that forcing Beth to accept his terms wouldn’t do any good in the long run. He knows she would keep cheating him with crime/ Rio in his head ( he has been there himself lol). And for a man like Dean who couldn’t stomach the fact that it was his wife now cheating on him.. Doing something he knew it was not fair to someone u were supposed to love? He couldn’t deal with that. He is still such a misogynist man bc I think he couldn’t make himself play house with her knowing she would probably come back to Rio in his head and keep fucking him, like I believe Beth would, happily, if so to keep her kids with her.

Classic  White male. I had this theory that maybe he would flip and blackmail her and well… In a way he did but I think that it was better this way. Beth didn’t become weaker in my eyes just bc she wasn’t the one to ask for a divorce and less of a boss bitch.

 I understand your frustration about the lack of confrontation about the cancer lie but I agree with @bensonstablers about the reasons why this didn’t happen. One of them is how Beth felt guilty herself that he was shot and probably that she didn’t know how to feel… If she was relieved or disappointed that her husband almost died. Beth is not a mean, evil person and even if I agree Dean is not the husband of the year, far from it, he is not a monster. He is good with the kids ( even if he lost his own in his damn house) and I believe that he cares for Beth, even in his twisted way. So I think deep down, Beth couldn’t wish for Dean’s death or be happy about it bc she is not a selfish person. She probably thought of her kids, without a father they certainly love and how close they were to lose him.

It doesn’t mean that all the things left unsaid between them can’t come back later… I doubt this season will be the last for Dean / Matthew Lillard. And the last episode showed us that the writers don’t forget things…So, I also wouldn’t say they are gonna try to make Dean look good… Or bad… I mean, I know there are characters we all hate with a passion, but underneath it all, at least I know that everyone in this show is not all black or White… They all navigate in between, meaning that none of them are sinners or saints. They have good and bad sides and they make a lot of mistakes, and some are leaning more on the dark side than others.

That is sometimes I say that I love to hate a certain character, but I’m mostly just kidding. I know that we need to see these characters with an open mind bc they are complex, beautifully written characters and that is why I love this show so much and why I have so much Faith in the writers of this show. 

They are not perfect and maybe they can disappoint me in some way - bc let’s face it, it happens!-, but right now I’m liking the direction they are taking things.

And about that hug?

I wouldn’t worry about it. I mean, I reblogged a post here talking about that hug and I meant what I said: it’s not bc they are divorcing that they need to be enemies now. These two share the same love for their children and they know each other for more than 20 years. Also, I don’t think Dean hate Beth enough to not offer her some kind of comfort when she is so worried about going to jail and be separated from her kids.

Again, I understand ur dislike or even disgust for that scene, bc like urself I’m not blind to Dean’s faults ( they were many after all), but again, he is not the monster of the story. Not right now anyway.

[aroworlds]

i'm a mod on an aro-ace blog which, if i am not there to reblog aro posts, mostly focuses on the experiences of aces and the ace community. i'm scared of reblogging aro posts even though no one (of the mods) has said anything about what i should post/not post. i think maybe i'm scared of inconveniencing aces (and aro /aces/) with aro content. i haven't contributed with aro content in a whole year bc of this fear even though i want to be aggressively and unapologetically aro

I wish I could sit a few well-known ace community bloggers down and show them the asks I get on this blog–sit them down at my desk, hold their heads straight so they can’t look away and then make them scroll down this Tumblr to see what you’re all saying. I wish this so much, anon, and it pains me that the best I can do is support and validate. Our conversations do matter, but these words remind me that our fight will be won in tiny, grudging steps, not the sweeping change we desire and deserve.

Anon, your feelings are not irrational: this isn’t an overreaction to attitudes that don’t exist, and I think it’s important to hold onto that. It’s too easy to feel like our fears aren’t valid, that it’s our own anxiety holding us back, and that isn’t the case here. This has happened because the ace-spec community as a whole has failed in its support of most folks who identify solely, predominantly or significantly as aro-spec. (Essentially, anyone who doesn’t or can’t centre the ace as first and foremost.) This failure to support doesn’t need to be explicitly voiced as antagonism–a silencing of aromantic and aro-ace experiences and conversations versus the centering of alloromantic ace experiences and conversations in ace spaces does this with remarkable effectiveness, no individual person needing to voice explicit aro antagonism or erasure. You’re afraid because ace-spec and general a-spec spaces, at least in recent history, have not been encouraging and supporting of unapologetic aromanticism.

In fact, because this isn’t explicit hatred, much of the time, it’s so much harder to answer. We feel like we’re responding to something that isn’t there; we feel like the anxiety is irrational or unsupported. If we are included at all, it’s only in ways that don’t threaten the narrative of alloromantic asexuality being centred and paramount, and when we question this centering and the resulting forms of aro erasure, we don’t get hate from much of the ace community–we just get ignored.

As someone who had my sister refuse to talk to me or look at me or treat me as a human living under the same roof for six months and more, being ignored isn’t a kindness. It’s damaging and traumatising. It’s just damaging in ways that are less visible and less understood, ways that lead to anxiety and uncertainty, ways that make it so difficult to step up and speak. When you have no assurance of an audience, you learn not to speak at all, and finding your voice after such silencing (especially while such silencing continues) is a difficult thing. I’m still struggling with it, and that might not seem real, given the words I spend on this blog, but I’ve spent three weeks now not publishing a finished story in part because I am so afraid of speaking and so afraid of the consequences.

Anon, if you don’t feel safe in being aggressively and unapologetically aro on the blog you mentioned, don’t. Your safety comes first, always, before activism and community building. You aren’t causing other aros harm by first looking after yourself: this situation is not of your making and you are not contributing to or enabling it. Activism–and this is activism–never comes before your comfort and safety, and it is truth that engaging in it opens us up to harmful responses, often lacking the ability to easily bear them because of the pain that drives us to activism in the first place. Not all of us, for thousands of reasons, have the ability to bear this, and that makes nobody any less of a person or an aro-spec. In a world where to be who we are is a hundred shades of wrong, just existing is a radical act, and I swear to you that is always, always, enough.

You are not less boldly, defiantly aro because you have been forced into a situation where it is unsafe to express yourself. Your aromantic pride is not less because you can’t speak it, and I have no time for anyone who believes otherwise.

If you’d like to start increasing the aro on this blog, though, start small. Start with really safe pieces to reblog like aro-ace characters, pride art or positivity, and introduce these more slowly onto the blog–one each day or every couple of days, say. Start with media least likely to be deemed objectionable and slowly get your followers (and co-mods!) used to seeing this content. You can then, still slowly, start throwing some aro-specific pride media and positivity, some allo-aro media, some aro-spec identity posts, some aro experience posts, etc, still focusing on content that leans towards positivity and pride. At the same time, you can start increasing the frequency, balancing out the more aro-specific works with pride and positivity pieces. When this has become normal blog fare, you can try a few of the less overtly frustrated-with-allo-ace posts about aro-ace erasure (if appropriate for the blog, of course) and work your way up towards real aro-spec community conversations (if appropriate for the blog). The same applies for your original content, anon–start small with pride art or positivity posts, let your followers grow accustomed to these and then start slowly feeding in posts that address aro-spec identity and experience, like stories or creative non-fiction posts, later building up to conversations on erasure.

A shift straight from everything ace to posts about aro erasure in the ace community risks ruffling feathers amongst followers and mods. That this risk is real says how much aro erasure is accepted and unconscious (oh, amatonormativity!), and nothing about the approach I’ve suggested is right. This is another case, anon, where we’re looking at a long, slow battle, inching our way towards progress. It involves a great deal of patience and hand-holding, both of which are so difficult, but I think it’s the best way of making change with the least (not none, just least) chance of hate or antagonism.

(If you never want to post anything difficult and just stick to media and characters and positivity, that’s also appropriate. You get to draw the line, always, on the kind of media you reblog and the conversations you have. Promoting positivity or identity exploration is absolutely an act of activism and it is no less empowering or vital an act than those of us who talk about erasure. I don’t get to have conversations without the work of folks who, through promoting positivity and 101 content, allow people to understand they are aro-spec; I’d be nothing here without those bloggers.)

I’ll stress again, anon, that if you can’t do this, for whatever reason, that is absolutely fine. You are no less aro-ace for keeping yourself safe. Your comfort and safety always becomes before activism. If you feel able to take that first dangerous, difficult step, though, this is how I’d do it. I’ll mention that this blog, today, has a very different timbre from its beginning; I never imagined having community conversations of the sort that we’ve found ourselves needing. Starting with safer things like media content or positivity is an important part of allowing bloggers, mods, followers and the blog itself to grow and develop–gradually and organically. I see no reason why this can’t happen anywhere else.

Good luck, and please know that whatever you do, anon, you are already and always aggressively and unapologetically aro. You wouldn’t have sent in this ask if you weren’t.

[evexe-n]

30, 34, 37 & 38 please! :D

[40 questions - meme for fic writers]

30. Do you accept prompts?

Ehm, not at the moment? I still have some from a year ago that went unanswered………OTL

Though I always reply to random headcanons/plot ideas sent my way, and I sometimes end up doing a drabble of lil’ ficlet for it, in general I’m very bad at writing what I’m told/asked to write………

34. What are your thoughts on non-con and dub-con?

YOU HAVE OPENED THE FLOODGATES. IN SHORT, I HAVE ANGRY EMOTIONS™ ABOUT IT (but below the cut for brevity’s sake. Also this won’t be about the YGO fandom so much as a general rant for all of the fandoms I’m in).

Trigger warnings(?) for brief(?) discussion of the way non-con and all related themes were portrayed in some of the less avory fics I’ve read, for lack of a better term.

Ok so let me start this off by stating that I did, once upon a time, not have as strong an aversion to fics with the non-con/dub-con label as I do now. I never actively seeked them out, but I never flat out refused to read a fic for containing these themes either. It’s how I came across many of the things I’m about to sum up. I’m still of the opinion that if you like reading them or they help you in some way, that’s great!

However, over the years I, personally, have developed a strong dislike of 95% of all dub/non-con fics, because I continuously encountered a lot of things that squick me in those stories. Here’s some specifcs:

In case of the non-con occuring between the main pairing:- I prefer reading fics where I don’t absolutely hate one of the main characters. When I love a pairing enough to want to read/write fic of them, I tend to love both characters equally. Having straight up non-con between them is a surefire way to ick me out- Here’s a point that’s going to come up a lot: often it’s just really OOC. And if it’s not OOC then it usually uses tropes like sex pollen/abo/aliens made them do it, which have their own subset of problems. Some people don’t mind OOC portrayals, but I am not one of those people

In case of the non-con happening between one main character + someone else (usually an antagonist):- I get it, you need an evil ex. For plot reasons. But I guarantee you there’s about 99 more creative ways to make this person a douche without immediately going the full-out non-con route. Especially when it’s an established character for whom it would be completely OOC.- Not every villain has to lust after/prey on your protagonist, it’s ok. Sometimes they can just be murderous psychopaths or megalomaniacs without the added sexual predator vibes. I promise you they’ll still creep me out. You lose shock value when you make every villain have the same motivation (namely, subjugating your protagonist by fucking them) so maybe switch it up every so often?- Alternatively: just because ‘rapist’ is shorthand for ‘evil asshole’ doesn’t mean every evil asshole in your fic has to be a rapist.

Just general things about dub/non-con fics that squick me out:- Please, I’m begging you all, stop using rape as a plot device to create drama and prolong the resolution of your fic. This is aimed at those fics that are going along nice and steady, nearly all loose threads are resolved when suddenly, oh no, kidnapped by the abusive ex/someone got taken advantage of after they got drunk at a party/etc! Fics where rape is treated as nothing more than another bump in the road that the couple needs to overcome to be together is just, yikes.(This does NOT refer to the fics where the author has a story to tell specifically about dealing with (sexual) abuse and and trauma. When it’s the entire focus of the fic, it’s usually treated with due respect instead of ‘ok and then A got raped by C but B still loves A so they’re all ok again in 2k words bc true luv’)- I heavily dislike power imbalances/abuse of authority, and this can be played up beyond belief in non-con- So often I’ll see the ‘dub-con’ tag used for something that, by all means, should be labeled non-con. I’m willing to accept ‘these two idiots are pining for each other but think it’s unrequited, both get drunk and make out/sleep together while intoxicated oh no’ as a dub-con, maybe. If only one of them is drunk? If both are drunk but one is explicitly saying no? If they’re under the influence of outside forces (ye olde ‘sex pollen’ trope)? That moves from dub-con into non-con territory imo, because either only one party could give full consent, or none could. I don’t care how enthusiastic they were about it Deborah, your a/b/o heatfic still has a total lack of clear-minded consent- Here’s the big one that I wish I had never encountered, but I have: fics where non-con/rape is described in detail, as in, it’s treated as if it’s just a run-of-the-mill PWP fic and written as if I’m supposed to find this sexy????? UHM??? I’m pretty sure I’m supposed to find this traumatizing to read, and I am, but for all the wrong reasons.

There is the remaining 5% of fics tagged dub/non-con that I CAN read, and even love sometimes though, just to be clear.

Fics where the dub/non-con happened in the past, off-screen. The further removed from the act itself, the more likely I am to be able to read it. I don’t have a problem with reading about trauma aftermath, I have trouble reading romantizations of non-con.

I can read PWP fics involving bdsm scenes of rape fantasies, but even then it has to be established that the two people about to engage in this scene are all on board or I’ll close the tab in 0.001 seconds flat

Fics dealing with the aftermath of canonical abuse/rape/trauma/etc. If only because these fics are often written by salty fans, so they rarely glorify the acts that were depicted in canon and include a fair amount of knowledge (or research at the least) on both the characters and their traumas. These fics I do seek out sometimes to get closure for something canon glossed over. If you think this point is about comics, it is. Specifically about Dick Grayson (Robin I/Nightwing). I’m willing to throw hands about both the Mirage and the Tarantula incidents they put him through and then handwaved away. Don’t get me started on that Deathstroke and Terra thing back in the day either.

Tl;dr - I prefer my fics consensual, that’s the baseline here.

37. Talk about your current wips.

...................suffering. That’s it that’s all my WIPs thanks for coming to my TED talk.

On a more serious note, I think most people that follow me know that the big WIPs are the 5SOD one and WDMC. WDMC is next in line to be updated as of now, but fuck if I know when I’ll get around to writing the end of that chapter. For a fic where I already know the entire plot, writing it sure isn’t going smooth =-=

38. Talk about a review that made your day.

I don’t think I could name a singular review that made my day, so much as all reviews do that for me? And this does include tags on reblogs for fic updates on tumblr, those are amazing to read.

Basically I just crave validation and feedback, so I thrive on every single comment I get. The YGO fandom especially spoiled me with this, because y’all just seem to love leaving comments??? I’m so happy with it, but it was one hell of a culture shock when I wrote stuff for other fandoms afterwards & comments came in less often.

here’s a fun little comparison, because I love analyzing my fic stats!

YGO, sorted by kudos:

vs my other stuff sorted by kudos

(I’m not shaming the other fandom btw, they are rly generous with their kudos and I love them for it, it just took some getting used to because of the different levels of feedback that I got. Unless it’s chaptered fics, that one did really well for some reason :’) )

That being said, I get really giddy when people comment on fics that I consider personal favorites. For YGO, Hypnagogia is one of them, as is The Flower Speaks (for the sheer amount of effort I put into it haha).

[obaewankenope]

The Gospel of the Anakin Apologist + The General Rudeness of Unrelated Comments on a Post

So @stonefreeak had an anon show up and whine about Padme. I and @sanerontheinside added our two cents in then *waves hands* SOME ASSHOLE shows up and wants to play ‘Anakin is a victim and Padme is a stupid ho and Obi-Wan is to blame for EVERYTHING EVER’ on the post even though, amusingly enough, it has no bearing on the discussion in the slightest.

Ergo I got vexed.

Actually all of us did bc wow stupid much.

The rest is under a read more because wow this got long and salty.

Also I’m tagging people so they can share the salt: @meabhair, @kyberpunk, @maawi, @markwatnae, @lilyrose225writes, @knight-kennedy, @punsbulletsandpointythings, @deadcatwithaflamethrower, @myurbandream, @jhaernyl :)

You see, we were discussing Padme as a female character and the double-standard around female characters being expected to be perfect and male characters essentially being able to do whatever the fuck they want so long as they’re pretty (pick a fandom, any fandom, you’re guaranteed to see the same dichotomy in treatment of male - female characters).

Apparently we can’t do that shit tho bc ‘oh no you’re blaming my bae!!!’ like wow, really fucking stupid much.

Anyway, to explain why I’m raging (why all of us are raging actually: it’s glorious to behold and I feel so blessed to experience the righteous fury of my spouses and friends) I personally feel like this particular person has literally pulled the embodiment of that “she doesn’t even go here” meme because whoa boy, their reblog does not belong here.

Now, in general I’m usually quite happy to let the morons roll on by like the sad little tumbleweeds of ignorance they are. But not when it’s on a post informing others of the behaviour and perception of gender/sex relations and treatment of characters in fandom. When you show up here and want to blame a single character who is flawed, especially just to venerate and excuse the behaviour of another flawed character... well, then I feel obligated to respond.

It’s not personal it is it’s just in my nature.

Okay so, first paragraph of their reblog (and subsequent stupid dialogue included) sums up the situation on Mustafar as ‘Padme should have been a good wife and sided with her genocidal husband who just helped wipe out thousands of lives (including children) bc she’s his wife’ and that ‘Obi-Wan is responsible bc he tried to do his duty as a Jedi’ and apparently that’s wrong as according to the Gospel of the Anakin Apologist.

Of course, they make a general, sweeping statement about Obi-Wan, describing him as a ‘fantastic space cop but an asshole friend and a person in general’ which, as I’m sure you’re all aware, shows a typical lack of understanding of what the Jedi are in universe, and also the background of Obi-Wan and Anakin’s interaction.

This isn’t unusual and I’m not gonna berate people for not knowing about the EU (Extended Universe) materials, or those damned benighted Junior Apprentice (JA) novels about Obi-Wan’s padawanship (and Anakin’s later on). The thing is though, there is plenty of information available about Obi-Wan, his background and so on on various websites -- Wookieepedia, to name but one -- so I don’t think it’s fair to be so quick to judge a character, any character, without understanding their background.

Even if this blogger is uninitiated into the ranks of SW lore and such, even if they only have the movies to go on, I still consider them to have a shockingly particular mindset and perspective of the relationship between the three protagonist characters.

So, here’s the thing, the below is a direct quote from their post. As you can see it’s... a particular perspective.

Padme should have sided with Anakin or Obi-Wan clearly when Anakin confronted her about Obi-Wan being on the ship, Obi-Wan killed Padme by appearing while they were talking, Padme might’ve been able to talk some sense into Anakin or join him, i guess Obi-Wan was afraid Padme would flip sides and decided to burst out with his “hello there” bullshit, if i was Padme i would have immediately said            “that fucker snuck on my ship i had nothing to do with this, take care of him my love!” or “oh shit, well i didn’t plan this Obi-Wan tag in!”            i know she was shocked and all that jazz but lady think on your feet, you went to meet your fugitive husband who just killed a academy full of space coplings on isolated planet and a space cop popped out of your trunk, use your words and use them quick! Anakin choking his wife in anger is understandable when you think of it from his perspective,           “ok im on the hide from the law(Jedi), ill contact my wife and get her to safety” “hi love i came alone as you asked”            “oh thank god for a moment i thought you might sympathize with the corrupt jedi” *Obi-Wan dumb ass pops out of the shadows* “hello there bitches!~~”            “wtf Padme?! you brought a cop to our meet out?! you do know i am wanted dead right!? You little bitch! i did this all so i could keep you alive and this is how you repay me? i killed younglings to get this power Padme fucking younglings! you ungrateful little bitch ill kill you!” “hey bro let her go you said you wanted to save her right? kind of doing the opposite right now”            “… god damn it i hate it when he is right, lets fight!”

First of all, they’re working on the assumption that Anakin was hiding from the Jedi. Second of all, that he was hiding from the Law(Jedi). Perhaps their memory has failed them, but I’ll provide a little breakdown of how the third movie actually went so they can understand that their initial narrative is... well, to put it plainly, ‘wrong and really wrong’.

1. Separatists vs Republic battle with Obi-Wan and Anakin going after Dooku. Dooku dies by Anakin’s hands after being disarmed (this is murder btw, rules of war mean that if your opponent loses or surrenders, then you don’t kill them -- this is generally considered a war crime). 

2. Obi-Wan and Anakin talk about stuff and then Obi-Wan heads off to chase Grievous alone. This is after Anakin has been put on the Council by Palpatine even though he’s only been a Knight for a while. The Jedi do not approve, Obi-Wan is cautious and advises Anakin to be careful (Anakin ignores him by the way and continues to be friendly with Palpatine).

4. While Obi-Wan is off after Grievous, Anakin has Palpatine’s identity revealed to him. Gets played into saving him from Mace and co in order to keep Padme alive (even though she isn’t dead by the way). Anakin then goes to the Temple with a collection of Clones and helps murder every Jedi there. He purposefully murders the children in the Council chambers. 

5. Obi-Wan is nearly killed after defeating Grievous because of Order 66. He escapes and hides. Meets up with Yoda and Bail. Goes to the Temple. Finds out that Anakin killed Jedi and is heartbroken by this fact. Then he goes to Padme after being tasked by his superior to go and defeat Anakin. He tells her the truth and she refuses to believe him.

6. Padme goes to meet with Anakin who is on Mustafar, drowning in his angst-ridden guilt of now having become an accomplice to genocide. Obi-Wan tags along, knowing that Anakin and Padme love each other so much that both would forsake their duties. He hides and Padme doesn’t know. Anakin doesn’t notice.

7. Padme rejects Anakin BEFORE Obi-Wan shows himself, because she realises he’s literally gone crazy. Then Anakin turns on Padme and chokes her into unconsciousness, even though she’s heavily pregnant and he ‘loves’ her. Obi-Wan gets Anakin to focus on him and they fight.

8. They fight to the point where Obi-Wan has the high-ground and Anakin does a stupid and gets his limbs cut off. Obi-Wan leaves him to burn to death (brutal) and goes to Padme. He takes her for treatment and instead watches one of his oldest friends die while her children are made into orphans.

9. Movie ends with Anakin becoming the giant suit version of Vader and Obi-Wan on Tattooine delivering Luke to his aunt and uncle.

Anakin isn’t evading the law, aka the Jedi, he’s killed them. Obi-Wan is the one evading the law because it wants him dead. Anakin is on Mustafar because Sidious told him to take out the Sep leadership. Padme meets him there after hearing the truth from Obi-Wan and only believes it when Anakin admits it himself. Then she rejects him. Obi-Wan does his duty as a Jedi -- sworn to destroy the Sith -- and the end is that Padme dies because Anakin loses his temper and lashes out at her.

I may be Anakin apologist but considering his situation he didn’t act out of character, id be pissed off too if i contacted my wife when i am in hiding and she brings a cop there (it seemed like that to Anakin since he didn’t know Obi-wan snuck on board) before i can explain myself to my wife

Firstly, you are an Anakin apologist and he did act out of character. His behaviour after discovering Sidious’ identity and stopping Mace from killing a Sith Lord is out of character. Anakin is a bright, kind and friendly child with a temper issue. Anakin is someone who hates injustice and despises the way some people are treated by others for no other reason than because of where they were born or who they were born to. He was a slave and then he became a Jedi; he went from victim to protector. His final character jump sent him from protector to oppressor. That’s not in character, that’s specifically cultivated and justified behaviour because he puts his own needs above absolutely everything else.

He also had the chance to explain to Padme. He didn’t deny what he did and Padme actively rejected him when she realised he wasn’t sorry for what he’d done ‘in the name of love’. You’re justifying abuse and don’t even realise it.

Think of it like this, in a galaxy where there are force powers etc shit you keep seeing horrible nightmares of your wife dying, your mother gets kidnapped by space isis and killed,             you butcher the village in retaliation and tell your wife about it, after which the greatest political figure of your “country” tells you that there is a way to save your wifes life from the faith that seems foretold (like someone offering you a cure for cancer when you think your wife has cancer),            the old dude tells you you have to do something to get the cure (equivalent would probably be extracting stem cells from kids spines or something lethal), well you love your wife and can’t let her die because love,            well you go and do the dirty deed like a loving husband would can’t let your honey bun die, now you’re kind of in hiding waiting for your old dude friend to wipe out the cops (rought shit but it will all be worth it when i save my wife from certain death),            you contact your wife and tell her to meet you in some backwater planet where you two can talk it out, you can tell her why you did it and you can finally save her from her faith, your wife finally arrives the joy we are finally together, listen wife the reason i killed the younglings is “Everybody down on the ground, the Jedi man has arrived!”,            all your efforts to get the cure, all you did in the name of saving your wife and she brings a cop to execute you (that’s what he thought and can’t blame him, how the fuck did she not know Obi-Wan snuck on board?)

Firstly, Shmi Skywalker was kidnapped and tortured by Tusken Raiders on Tattooine, not ‘Space ISIS’. The settlers on Tattooine are the proverbial invaders of a planet where the Tuskens are the natural species. So your metaphor is inaccurate and shows but a lack of understanding and also a clear desire to produce extreme sympathy for Anakin. We don’t know why the Tusken’s took Shmi but it’s generally considered unusual behaviour. We do know that they have attacked farms on Tattooine before and that they have been united by an ex-Jedi at one point when Obi-Wan was in exile. This is all we know. So you’re making an assumption that they’re evil terrorists when you don’t even have the material to back you up. 

Anakin killed an entire village of Tuskens, including women and children. There is no excuse for that. Unless you think it would be acceptable for a US soldier to execute the children in an Iraqi village because some of the inhabitants were part of Al Queda? 

Obi-Wan had already informed Anakin in Attack of the Clones that ‘dreams pass in time’ referring to Anakin’s recurring problems with his dreams about his mother. Anakin didn’t inform Obi-Wan of anything after that and so Obi-Wan has no knowledge. He tried to help, in his own way. Anakin’s behaviour and fear of what he dreamt about Padme drove him to extremes of behaviour -- the love he held for her is what destroyed him because he was so selfish as to refuse to let her go.

The dangers of attachment isn’t of falling in love, it’s in that love turning into obsession which is what happened with Anakin. Palpatine used Anakin’s fears of losing Padme to sway him into his service and with Mace’s death, sealed his fate and that of Padme. 

Do you honestly think Padme would have died had she not been choked into unconsciousness by her ‘loving’ husband on a boiling planet of death, after the revelation that her husband had willingly committed genocide because of his love for her? 

If you do then there’s no hope for you.

The dialogue of the Mustafar scene is below, read it and perhaps recognise that Anakin admits to having become obsessed with power and paranoid. Perhaps also recognise how Padme only rejects him after he says he’s going to overthrow the Chancellor and together they can rule the galaxy.

Padme: Obi-Wan told me terrible things Anakin: What things? Padme: He said, you’d turned to the Dark Side. That you... killed younglings? Anakin: Obi-Wan is trying to turn you against me Padme: He cares about us Anakin: Us? Padme: He knows. He wants to help you... Anakin, all I want is your love Anakin: Love won’t save you Padme, only my new powers can do that Padme: At what cost? You’re a good person, don’t do this! Anakin: I won’t lose you the way I lost my mother. I am becoming more powerful than any Jedi has ever dreamed of. And I’m doing it for you. To protect you Padme: Come away with me. Help me raise our child. Leave everything else behind while we still can! Anakin: Don’t you see? We don’t have to run away anymore. I have brought peace to the Republic. I am more powerful than the Chancellor. I- I can overthrow him. And together you and I can rule the galaxy. Make things the way we want them to be Padme: [backs away, shaking head] I don’t believe what I’m hearing. Obi-Wan was right, you’ve changed Anakin: I don’t want to hear any more about Obi-Wan. The Jedi turned against me, don’t you turn against me Padme: I don’t know you any more. Anakin... you’re breaking my heart. You’re going down a path I can’t follow Anakin: Because of Obi-Wan?  Padme: Because of what you’ve done! What you plan to do! Stop! Stop now! Come back! I love you! Anakin: LIAR! Padme: No! Anakin: You’re with him! You brought him here to kill me! [Starts choking HIS WIFE] Obi-Wan: Let her go Anakin!

The end of this interaction is that Padme rejects Anakin for going power-mad, Anakin admits he’s become a stranger to her and then attacks her over a perceived betrayal -- out of character for someone who at the beginning of the movie thought Padme might have been cheating on him and then APOLOGISED for thinking such things in the first place. 

In conclusion to your post that I’m not going to ever reblog, but will link here so others can read it in full, I have to say that your ending paragraph is... well, a fantastic example of selective thinking and something I daresay several of my friends from my psych classes would have had a field day with the dispositional and situational bias you exhibit.

who nearly killed Anakin and Padme? Obi-wan freaking Kenobi, well done douchebag, be sure to lie to his son that Vader killed Anakin to pit a son against his own father, Obi-wan was a fantastic space cop but an asshole friend and a person in general, dude is the reason Luke’s father is a space cyborg and Padme is a corpse, but that’s not all let’s turn their son into a space cop and tell him to kill daddy cyborg, he’ll never know it was his father, if he did this could really backfire but who gives a shit ill probs be dead by then