#i put on falsies myself for the first time today how to people do it 🤩🤩 nd i couldnt push my glasses up or my lashes would brush against

[seungminsmile]

omg @ the stays sitting between seungjin... what does it feel like to win 😔😔

[causeimthesupernovaa]

Gold Digger

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• Zuho + Reader

• Genre: Angst

• Words: 2.6k

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You entered the hall filled with the extravagant melody of violins and cellos together, arms tangled on his. Everybody was staring while you two walked down the stairs. Some stares were of approval, other of the complete oposite. You didn't care, though. The only opinion which mattered to you was Juho's.

"Mr Baek," a woman in her fifties with a elegant hairstyle approaches you. "I'm glad you came."

"Of course," he smiles. "I would never miss your charity dinner."

They start chatting and your mind drifts away. You had a mission tonight, and you wouldn't go home until you had fulfilled it.

Shit. You didn't even know how you'd manage to do it. He might hate you forever...

"I found your dress to be very beautiful, miss...?"

You turn your attention to the host.

"Y/N. Thank you very much," you smile and look briefly at your own body. The red dress outlined your figure with grace and liveliness. You'd never been so beautiful, you thought.

To be sincere, Juho was the one who gave it to you. You could never have payed for something like that, not to mention all the jewelry and professional makeup you were also wearing. Before, this was everything you've ever wanted. This life, all this luxury... well, but now it meant nothing to you.

"Make yourselves comfortable," the host bows slightly and moves away.

Juho touches your face.

"Are you alright? You look a little absent-minded."

"It's nothing," you fake a smile. "Let's just sit down."

He agrees with a nod and you go look for the sits reserved for "Mr Baek". It doesn't take long and you find them.

"Mr Baek! We ended up in the same table, isn't that great?" a man asks as you sit down in front of him.

"Yeah, great," Juho's eyes say something else... He doesn't notice, though.

"Won't you introduce us to your companion?" the woman next to him smiles.

"Ah. Mr and Mrs Yang, this is Y/N, my girlfriend."

You greet them with a little leaning of the head.

"She's lovely," Mr Yang says. You could almost taste the falsiness in all that talking.

"For how long have you been dating?"

"Six months. We completed six months last week," Juho answers proudly. You can't help but smile a bit.

"Hmm, interesting. I heard you didn't come from any of the great companies," Mrs Yang remarks with pretended casuality.

You would usually retort, but not anymore. You knew you were as fake as those people. Actually, worse. Because you pretended to be sincere.

Your glare crosses with Juho's. He seems to see the pain in your eyes.

"Thank God," he lets out and stares at the Yangs coldly. "I wouldn't want to involve myself with people like you."

Silence follows.

"What did you say?"

"I think you understood it perfectly, Mr Yang. Y/N is way superior to the kind of people you two are."

"No one treats my fami—"

"Don't pay attention to him, honey. Let's just go. This event isn't worth our presence."

The two of them get up and get away mumbling in between each other.

You turn to Juho. Little did he know that you deserved his cold, harsh words too.

Still, your heart got warm seeing him defending you like that. When the subject was Juho, it was always like that: your stone heart would melt completely.

"I love you," you say without thinking.

The boy widens his eyes.

"I-I—"

"Hi! We are sitting on this table too," a friendly couple interrupts you, sitting next to you. You two smile back at them, giving end to your conversation. Soon the dinner starts been served.

For the next one hour or two, an awkward mood sets in between you and Juho. You didn't talk to each other. You would just focus on the seafood in your plates and sometimes chatter with the other couple.

You had never told Juho you loved him. Ever.

He had already done it plenty of times, but you'd never answer. You didn't dare to. How could you, when you didn't deserve to love him, didn't deserve to have his heart? Tonight, though, your heart had spoken on its own.

This was just so wrong. He was completely handed over to you... but your relationship was an illusion. Well, at least it had started as one.

But you couldn't take that lie anymore.

You get up from your chair.

"Juho, can we go outside for a bit? I need to talk to you," he looks at you and gets up too, following you in silence to the mansion's garden. You stop in front of some flowery bushes. "Juho, look I—"

He puts his hands on each side of your face and gives you a brief kiss.

"Thank you, Y/N, thank you," he says, eyes looking lovingly at you.

You look back confused.

"For what?"

"For everything. Loving me, having entered my life..."

Wow. With the lie's weight on your stomach, you had even forgotten about your confession from earlier.

"You don't have to thank me for anything, Juho. The one in debit here is me."

"Nonsense. You appeared in my boring and repetitive life and completely lit it up. I know I've said this a million times, but I want you to be sure, to know every minute how I feel: I love you, girl."

He takes you by the waist and gets your body close to his, joining your lips together. You forget everything then. There's no room to think, his warm mouth being too much against yours. There's only room to kiss him back, and you do.

Juho tilts your body and you smile against his lips. He would always do that. There was no one who kissed like Baek Juho. The way his hand grabbed your dress's fabric on your back, the other hand tangled in your hair...

You hug his pale neck as he starts playing with your tongue. Ah... he could go broke right now and you wouldn't even think for a second about abandoning him... Oh!

The memories flood your mind and you part your lips from his.

"What's the problem, Y/N?" he looks at you calm, hand still on your back.

You sight and let go completely from his arms.

"I can't take it anymore," you stare deep into his eyes. "I need to tell you something, Juho."

7 MONTHS BEFORE

"So? Will the energy really go down?"

"Trust me, Y/N. Have I ever let you down?" Inseong says with a mischievous smile on his face.

"Ok, ok. I just want everything to work out."

"You're elaborate, aren't you? You've planned everything detail by detail."

You grin.

"Of course. It's going to be my livelihood for the rest of my life."

"Well... I wonder if I should be helping you at all. Are you sure you can take lying for the rest of your life?"

You immeadiately frown.

"Don't go judging me, Inseong. I don't have any degree or something and refuse to live in such a mediocre manner for the rest of my life."

"Damn. Ok, then. I'll go on with my "mediocre" eletrician life while you wear Prada and deceive yourself."

"Seong, that wasn't what I meant. I—"

"Don't worry about it, Y/N. There, I've finished," he closes the eletric board and gives you some kind of remote control. "Press this red button and it will all happen just as you so well planned."

You were about to say something, but he leaves through the front door and gets in his car first, getting away fast.

Okay, you probably shouldn't have said that to him...

All your guilt vanishes when the bell rings, though. That's it, Y/N. You can do it.

"Juho," you say smiling as you open the door.

"Oh, hey," he bows. "Here it is. I'm so sorry to have kept your watch. I don't even know how it ended up in my backpack, to be honest," he scratches the back of his neck.

You smile, taking the object in your hands.

Of course he didn't know. You were the one who put it in there on purpose during your Highschool class reunion last week. It was a wonderful plan, wasn't it? You just had to write your name on the back of your watch for Mr Heir to come look for you.

"Don't worry about it," you smile. "Maybe your backpack was open and I ended up letting it fall into it when I took it off to go to bathroom or something."

Or maybe you took advantage to put it in there when he went to the bathroom...

"Oh, it doesn't matter. At least you have it now, right?" he smiles. "Well, I've got to go. We'll see each other a—"

"No, no. It would be very rude of me to just let you go like that."

"Hum?"

"Come in, Juho."

"I really have to—"

"It will be very quick. Just a coffee?"

He sights and smiles. He seemed reluctant. You hoped his personality didn't end up screwing everything up. He was already reserved like this back in school days...

"Alright. Just a coffee."

You smile and pull him inside.

"You can wait on the couch. I'll be back with the coffee in a second," you say and go to the kitchen. Once there, you take the remote from your pocket.

You take a deep breath. Now was the time. You press the red button and the sound of energy and lights going out echoes through your small house.

You hear Juho's voice.

"Y/N, did something happen over there?"

You come back to the living room.

"I think this sound was of a power outage. I won't be able to heat the coffee up..."

"It's okay," Juho gets up from the sofa. "I didn't want to bother anyways. Thank you for everything, Y/N. I'd better be on my way now."

"Okay," you pretend to be a little disappointed and walk up to the door with him. You put your hand on the door knock and pull it down. The door doesn't move. "Uh-oh."

"What is it?"

You look at him.

"The door unlocks automatically from the inside. It's an... eletric door."

"Are you saying... we can't get out?"

"Yeah?" you lower your head. "Wait a second. I'll call the power company."

"Ok."

You go to your room and wait a little until you go back into the living room.

"They said the problem it's from a little far away from here," you tell Juho.

"Alright. And how long will it last?"

"They couldn't really answer that."

You smile internally. It would last until something brewed between you two.

...

And it did. You admit it, you had to force it a bit, but in the end you got the future Han River Corporation CEO to ask you out. Well then, you went out, and one month after that he asked you to be his girlfriend. Everything was going according to plan... until you began feeling very happy, and not for the reasons you had thought you would be...

"Are we watching something today?"

"Sorry. Not today," you take a sip from your juice. "I'm going out with Juho today."

Inseong's smile disappears.

"That's all you do now. You don't have time for me anymore."

"Don't overdo it, Seong."

"I'm not! You spend so much time caressing Juho's ego you don't even hang out with me anymore."

"We're hanging out now."

He shakes his head.

"Oh, really? That's only because you needed my damn help to install your new TV given to you by dear Juho! You only think of yourself, you know? Playing with two men's hearts and don't giving a shit."

"Stop being so dram... Two? Two men?" you look at him without understanding.

"Yes, Y/N! Two. Stop playing innocent! You know very well I've been crazy about you since forever! You know what? I'm sick of enduring your egocentrism in silence!

You were in shock.

"Seong, I—"

"Don't touch me!" he takes your hand away from his shoulder. "When you decide to be a good friend, look for me again."

And with no more words, he leaves through the door, only the heavy shadow of what he said remaining in the room.

You were still crying when Juho arrived to pick you up. You had completely forgotten about it.

"I think it's better if we don't go out today," you say through the intercom when he rings the bell.

"Why?" he asks through the other side.

"I think I'm sick. Bye."

"Wait up! Is that a crying voice?"

You don't answer for a second.

"No."

"Y/N..."

"Good night."

You get away from the door and throw yourself back into the couch.

But your phone rings. Nice.

You answer it.

"Who is it?"

"You haven't checked it, have you?"

You take your phone off from your ear and check the name.

"Juho, we can talk later, ok?"

"Please, Y/N, tell me what's the problem. It's hard to see you so down."

You close your eyes and sight. He would probably never go away until you said something. You open the door.

"Juho, I—"

You're caught off guard when the boy flies to you, holding you tight.

"You don't have to say anything. I'm here with you," at that moment you can't take it anymore. You break down in tears on his shoulder, even though you knew you didn't deserve his comfort. "Shh," he caresses your hair. "It is all going to be alright."

Why were you such a fool? You ended up telling him about your fight with Inseong and letting him comfort you, distract you. You were a fool. You ended up letting him stay, letting yourself go by his cares. You were a fool. You ended up letting yourself get to know the real and wonderful Baek Juho, ended up making love with him that night. You were a fool. You endep up falling for him.

.

Juho listened to your story until the end in silence. You'd have prefered if he had yelled at you. The silence, always so comfortable between you two, was now unberable.

"Won't you... say anything?" you ask uncertain.

"What do you want me to say?" his voice leaves his mouth in a whisper. When he lifts his head and his eyes meet yours, you see silent tears. "There's absolutely nothing to be said."

Another silence. You knew you were completely on the wrong, but a little bit of hope insisted on shining in your chest.

"Juho, I love you for real now. If you left everything and all your money, I'd still follow you."

Slowly, very slowly, he takes a step your way. Your heart jumps, anticipation killing you inside. He takes your chin in his fingers and lifts it, his eyes seeming to spark. At last, he dives in and joins your lips together. At first, you thrill at his touch, but it doesn't last. You soon realise it wasn't his usual kiss. No. It wasn't sweet, not even a bit. It was agressive, indelicate. There was love, but there was also hate, regret and broken heart.

It was your last kiss.

"It's too late now. The woman I used to love, the woman I though was different from everybody else doesn't exist. I hope I can get rid of these feelings soon, though I doubt it," he laughs dryly. "I'm such a fool I'll probably keep loving you even if I hate you."

He takes one step back, tears shining as they go down his cheeks.

"I meant it, Juho," you say and hold his arm desperately. "I love you for real now."

He takes your hand off gently.

"Go find another rich man with whom to play, Y/N."

And just like that, he turns around and leaves your life forever. Midnight had arrived. The insignificant Cinderella's prince was gone.

The sobs almost prevent you from speaking, but even so you shout out to night, hoping he was still close enough to hear:

"I'll always love you, Baek Juho!"

[punkscowardschampions]

Lux & Amber

Lux: Hey, Amber, I was wondering if I could talk to you, when you've got the time to 💬 back and forth for a bit 😌 Amber: Hi Amber: this'll work... Amber: are you okay? Lux: Yes in the sense this isn't a total emergency Lux: but no in the sense I'm not bothering you for no reason Lux: I don't know how to start this Amber: total emergencies are what my mama's for anyway, but I'll still try to help, if I can Lux: Yeah Lux: not that I'll be having that kind of emergency ever Lux: well, it was his idea Lux: and I don't know whether he expected me to follow up on it or not but I'm going to Lux: so maybe I don't feel as insane Lux: it's about Dash Amber: Oh Amber: we're not together if that's what's worrying you, it was just once Amber: and it won't be happening again Lux: I knew you weren't Lux: maybe knew is an overstatement, thought, anyway Lux: what do you think of him? Amber: you did, because he doesn't do 'together' and we all know that Amber: what did he do to make you feel insane? Amber: I think it's probably similar to the way he made me feel stupid, but I'm ready to be wrong Lux: How did he make you feel stupid? Amber: I thought we were friends, we're not Amber: and I thought that maybe he was just a little lost, but he knows exactly what he's looking for Lux: Yeah Lux: I think it might be the same Lux: he said one thing at the time Lux: but then today he said something that made that all so Lux: gross Amber: because he wanted something different from you today from wanting to have sex with you Lux: he said it was part of the tour Lux: which in itself...but then he said he only did it to 'tourists' Amber: I've been here for months, how am I a tourist? Lux: I know! Amber: my family lives and works here and he goes to school with me, I see him every day for like hours, on the commune and outside of it Lux: I wanted him to admit that it was a lie, that this was like family, because that isn't what you do to family, even if it's totally chill or whatever, you still don't view all these girls as your sisters, like you clearly do the boys as your bros Lux: but he couldn't do that, 'cos if this is all bullshit then what is he doing Lux: but then that amounted to him essentially saying he did it to the most fucked up, vulnerable girls, who he knew would go away before it became an issue for him...and that's me, so, everything else he said is untrue and manipulative and Amber: I don't think he understands family for what it's worth, whether he really believes this is one or he's hiding behind that Amber: but if that's his perspective, I understand now why he seemed to immediately regret sleeping with me, because it's unlikely I'm leaving any time soon Amber: even if my 'vulnerability' did jump out Lux: you've at least confirmed I'm not hysterical Lux: he said I should ask you, that it's cool Amber: I'm sorry he hurt and used you like that, I didn't realise I'd have to start warning every girl here Amber: or that he was THAT person Amber: yes, he lied to me and stole from me but he's not the first hippie boy I've met who tried to do some kind of free love revival Lux: he said he wasn't scared of me 'telling' on him to these girls because everyone else is into it too Lux: but he asked me not to multiple times so clearly he doesn't think everyone would still be down if it was total transparency Amber: plenty of people here are into it and whatever you say or don't say, there'll be girls who are still into him Amber: I fell for it after everything I'd seen and heard because he made me want to, I was still willing to give him another chance afterwards Amber: pretty face and prettier words, right? Lux: I'm just sick of dealing with people who are shitty Lux: just because they're not as shitty to me as everyone else Amber: there are people here who would listen, I hope, hold him accountable instead of falling into the forgiveness and understanding speech immediately Amber: my mama, for one, if it came from you instead of me Lux: there's people here who don't like me too Lux: more than that Amber: Who? Lux: I'm not trying to turn this into a big tattle-tale party Lux: I tried to tell him but he wasn't listening Amber: you can tell me, I'll keep my temper and listen Amber: nobody wants to listen to teenage girls and I'm not feeding into that lie that we're all hysterical, even though I am angry Lux: some of the older ladies Lux: they don't think I am a teenage girl Lux: that I've co-opted the experience of being a woman for the aesthetic, without ever having to face the adversity and struggles they do, as biological women Amber: I don't have the vocabulary to express how disgustingly narrow and dangerous that thinking is Lux: it's interesting to hear it from a perspective other than religion, I guess Lux: but still Lux: he thinks it's perfect here, and everyone is Amber: and his brother thinks it's hell on earth Lux: you know his brother? Amber: I met him and my 'aesthetic' jumped out for him Amber: he decided who I am because I live here Lux: I almost thought he'd made him up Lux: in a weird way Lux: I don't know how you get Dash and then him, from what he sounds like, anyway Amber: their experiences are actually entirely different Amber: Dash has opted out of any of the struggles, by being here, so it is perfect for him in that way, I guess Amber: like a utopia Amber: it's no wonder his brother thinks none of us live in the real world Lux: He doesn't 'do' responsibility, he said that Lux: responsibility to be an alright person really is the minimum Amber: plenty of people here obviously don't either Amber: those woman you mentioned don't even understand their own privilege, they just want to tell you yours Lux: don't get me wrong Lux: here is fine Lux: and lots of the people are nice and whatever Lux: but whenever I talk about my family it's like this smugness of how backwards they are when I've got the same treatment from plenty of non-religious folks for no reason but disagreeing Lux: my parents think they're saving me from eternal damnation, because they love me, that's not nothing Amber: like the thinking that anything about living this way makes us superior isn't backward Amber: they're pretending to be free and open is the key to the kingdom and the only way anyone gets to be here Amber: but it's not Lux: I just need somewhere I'm safe Lux: so I can actually sort out what I'm doing with the rest of my life Amber: I know what you mean Amber: I feel like I'm always asking for time to figure things out but it doesn't happen like that Lux: Sorry to put more strain on your time right now Lux: it just Lux: ugh Amber: honestly, it's a relief that there's someone else who feels the same about this place Amber: I can't talk to my parents about it, they love it here Lux: You can talk to me about it any time Lux: even if I am your dad's teacher's pet right now Lux: I just get really bored of the manual labour here, I don't mind chipping in, obviously, but being stuck here all day every day, I want to be using my 🧠 Amber: he talks about you A LOT and I am jealous but I'm not holding it against you personally Amber: if only you could take my place in school... Amber: but for now, do you want to come with me? Somewhere where everything is concrete and plastic? Lux: Dash would be so upset we're not talking about him right there Lux: sounds like heaven Amber: does he 'do' upset? 🙄 Lux: I'm trying not to care right now Amber: we're caring about 🛍💅 like teenage girls with like ZERO struggles Amber: I full intend to buy the most uncomfortable and impractical bra ever and wear it everywhere those women are Lux: 😆 Lux: as long as I can find some falsies to fill mine Amber: I probably should too, there's not much going on here Amber: and when you're in a better headspace, I'll introduce you to my friends from school Amber: I think it'll help Lux: really? 😀 😃 Amber: Yes, some of them are so 'normal' it makes me feel 👽 Amber: but in a good way Lux: I could use that Amber: the conversations hit different because they are Lux: I liked talking to him Lux: 'til he messed it all up Amber: not to be ✌☮🕊 but do you want to give him another chance? Lux: I really don't know what I think or what I'm going to do yet Lux: I've got no desire to hate anyone or be petty Lux: but he isn't sorry so Lux: I'm just a pushover and an idiot if I give him another chance Amber: caring is important but you need to care about yourself too, especially if he isn't sorry Lux: I just hope he can make some better choices Lux: but unlikely Lux: he's happy with how it is right now Amber: treating girls right instead of passing them around like 🚬🌿 isn't growth he's ready for Amber: yet Lux: its hard to know what I should say Lux: if anything Lux: to these other girls he was openly being nasty abouy Amber: his honesty was brutal, why soften the truth if it only protects him? Amber: you can always show them the relevant parts of the conversation if you kept it Lux: I'd feel like crap if other people got hurt needlessly when I knew Lux: but I'm hardly endearing myself to them if they don't see it how I do and they just think I'm trying to like, claim him or whatever nonsense Amber: I can do it, he's already made all those jokes about me being 💔 Amber: and I've been here long enough for everyone to know who I am Lux: 🙄😒 Lux: why are guys like that Lux: they say they wanna chill with down girls but then their ego makes them wanna believe you're actually in LOVE with them Amber: I wish I knew, and that I didn't have sex with him Amber: but he probably would have said I did anyway, I guess Lux: He's the second person I've ever Amber: well now I'm really 😠 Amber: my dad'll be upset about it but if I see him around I will hit him Lux: I mean, I'm straight Lux: so I was gay Amber: that's adversity if those judgemental woman would like to get into it, liking boys is the biggest struggle Amber: they really don't make it easy for us Lux: Are there any boys you like that aren't him Amber: I need to make better decisions, so that means saying no to that question Lux: Gotcha Amber: but it's a lie and I'm not lying to you today too Amber: just so you know Lux: I appreciate it Lux: probably got enough frivolous boy chat for the both of us though, so you can try to be better Amber: he did say he likes me, I do have that in writing, but what have we learned today if not to trust stuff like that Lux: is he from school? Lux: not all guys can be total assholes, right Lux: that sounds like something those old ladies would say Amber: he's a good person but he insists he's bad for me, I have to listen to that, don't I? Lux: depends why he thinks that, I suppose Lux: it could be an insecurity thing Lux: or a genuine warning Amber: he thinks it's genuine, and I know why he does, we are very different Lux: good different like your school friends Lux: or the bad kind Amber: I don't know Lux: Tricky Amber: it's another thing I need more time to figure out Lux: You'll have it Lux: boys wait for girls like you Amber: girls like me? Lux: Beautiful Amber: that's girls like US Lux: 😌😚 Amber: beautiful and weird and getting out of here for a while even if boys are waiting for us Lux: heck yeah! Lux: he's waiting on Cleopatra though, currently Amber: who? Amber: is she new here? Lux: oh, that's not her real name Lux: umm Lux: another 💎 Amber: he's not waiting for me Lux: Sapphire! Amber: of course Lux: I don't know her Amber: she got here a few weeks ago, her brother Onyx tends to speak for her more than she does for herself Lux: don't love that Lux: was picturing Liz Taylor Lux: wouldn't need to worry about her Amber: did he say she looks like Elizabeth Taylor? Lux: just Cleo Lux: well, 'vibe' which can mean everything and nothing, I really don't know Amber: I don't 👀 it Lux: like you said, if anything his words are pretty Lux: which is nice, in a fucked up kinda way Amber: I don't think I'll try and remember how he described my 'vibe' though Lux: just let me know if he's doubling up on 👼s Amber: there are less 👼🏽 it would be creative Amber: but no Lux: not going to keep a list for him so he can keep track or anything Amber: if he keeps one himself I didn't find it when I searched his room Lux: wait, WHAT??!? Amber: he stole my stash, I didn't want my dad to get upset with me so I went to his house to see if I could get it back Amber: that's how I met his brother Amber: I didn't find it, if he smoked with you, that was on me Lux: asshole Lux: I need to find something cute to wear at the shops Lux: it's the most teen girl response possible Amber: [tells her where she can find all the best clothes because it'd be such a free for all cos nobody has proper rooms or storage like] Lux: 🤞 having my ankles on display is a CHOICE LEWK Lux: ['cos how many of these malnourished girls are 5'10 lol] Amber: ✂ Amber: short shorts are a teenage girl staple Amber: I'm going to get something else pierced while I'm this young and beautiful Lux: 😄😄 I have the legs for it 💁 Amber: and if you get 😽 called, you get to say everything Dash refused to listen to earlier Lux: Alright, I'm ready 😎 🤩 🥳 Amber: 🙃 Amber: let's go!

[hollands-poppet]

WISE GUY PT 1/ MOB! TOM HOLLAND X READER

Summary: you’re studying abroad with school when you suddenly find yourself at the hands of one of London’s most powerful mobsters.

Word count: 2.3 K 💛

So I’ve actually been quite nervous to post this but so many amazing writers on here inspired me to start my own fic. I hope you guys truly enjoy this, I’m so excited to unfold the rest of the story for you guys. Also shout out to my best friend for helping me with this moodboard..💛

warnings: there is cussing but future parts will have tons of smut fluff angst death all that other good shit

“But [Y/N] this is the first night we actually have free..” I’m listening to my friend on speaker on my phone as I am pouring almond milk into my Special K cereal.

“Alex, I’m tired.. This studying abroad shit is harder than I thought. I don’t know how you guys even convinced me to study out here in London.” I grab my bowl of cereal, I walked from the kitchen to the living room. I plaster myself in the couch and pull up Stranger Things on our shitty TV. Our apartment was small but cozy, one bedroom. I slept on the couch.

“That is even more of a reason to go out dude, we didn’t come here to sit on our asses.” She says through the phone, I roll my eyes and let her blab on while I put her on mute. I zone out until I hear, “ [Y/N] ? [ Y/N] !?!” I quickly unmute her, “ Oh, uh yeahh..sure.” I hear her gasp, “Oh my god, you’re down!? Yaaass! Okay, I’m gonna pick up Cesar and we’ll head over to the apartment in a bit.” She hangs up before I could say even bye.

I wasn’t too sure what I had agreed on but I’m pretty sure I just said yes to going out. I put my feet on the table in front of me and press play on the current show. Drunk Nancy comes up on my screen, “We’re bull-shiitt..” The character Steve responds, “You don’t love me?” I scoff, I can’t believe he actually thought that Nancy was in love with him. We’d been out here for two weeks from LA, and I hadn’t met one anyone out here. Not that I was looking of course but I wanted to live out my fantasy of dating an English guy but that wasn’t happening.

It’s been about 20 minutes since I had gotten off the phone, and I hear the front door open and its Alex and Cesar, they’re laughing so loud I’m so eager to know what they’re laughing about. “Hey [Y/N]!” Cesar says as he drops his bag on the floor and takes a seat on the couch. Alex and Cesar were my best friends from school, I’ve known them since I was 16, I’m 22 now. We just happened to go to the same college, and they both convinced me to study out here for 2 months, I mean it was paid for by my scholarship so that was just another reason I came out here.

“Hey, what are you guys laughing at?” I ask as I take a sip of my water.

Alex and Cesar glance at each other before she answers, “Oh, just how you’re gonna die when we’re at that strip club tonight.” I cough and lightly spit up some of my drink, “Strip club?!” Alex plops herself in between Cesar and I, “And you can’t back out [Y/N]! You said you would come!” I bring myself to my knees on the couch, and before I speak I think to myself, “Shit, I can’t let her know I wasn’t listening..”

She puts her hands on my shoulders, “Besides, it’ll be funny dude! Getting a little strip tease from a girl and besides I read reviews about the club and it has good music.”

Wow, even a better reason to go I guess.. I just roll my eyes at her remark and sink into the couch. I don’t know what to expect later tonight.

-

-

I really don’t know what to wear, I brought so much clothes but I swore I didn’t have anything for tonight. I looked through my luggage, and I remembered I had packed one dress that was meant for a “night out on the town.” Although when I packed it, I didn’t intend to wear it to a strip club, shaking my fucking head. Alex also told me to dress boujee, she said it was a hella fancy club so I guess the dress I had was perfect.

It was an long sleeve rose gold bodycon dress, with sequin detailing that really made the dress look expensive. It wasn’t but nobody had to know that. I sprayed glitter on my body, adding a nice glare to my skin. FUCK. I didn’t pack any heels, I ran to Alex’s luggage and pulled out a pair of nude heels, what a life saver. I curled my [Y/H/C] hair and did a really natural make-up look tonight. I highlighted my face to the gods, and threw on some falsies and a nude lip that really brought out my [Y/E/C] eyes.

Alex walked into the bathroom, and her draw dropped, “oh my god, you look expensive [Y/N]!”

I pop my hands into my hair creating more volume, “well you said to dress boujee Alex, I’m just trying to look the part!” I look back at her and she looks just as expensive as me, and knowing Alex she is probably wearing an expensive Chanel dress. We hear Cesar from the living room, “Let’s go before they play all the good music!!” I give Alex a quick hug and start to walk out of the restroom before she grabs my wrist, “are those my heels?”

-

-

The fact that Alex even found this place on Yelp is weird because our taxi literally dropped us off at the most sketchiest place. It was literally an alley that was 30 minutes away from our apartment and the alley only had one light on and it felt like we were about to get mugged at any second. We followed the light that was centered in the alley and we saw a black door that read “knock twice.”

THIS WAS FUCKING SKETCHY.

“Well knock, this was your idea Einstein.” I push Alex forward as she knocks, she’s shaking. The door opens and a man in a suit opens it and immediately looks at us, “Password?”

Cesar and I turn to each other and our eyes widen, we were definitely not in the right location. Before any of us say anything, Alex responds “Wise Guy.”

The man nods his head and moves out of the way so that we enter. Alex steps in first and Cesar and I follow.

I catch up to her side and nudge her “What was that about? What password?” As we keep walking, cigarette smell hits my nose and it reeks of alcohol. She hangs on to Cesar’s arm and starts dancing while walking towards the inside of the club, I stop her before we pass into the next room.

“Alex! What’s going on? Why did he need a password?”

She turned and has a guilty smile, “Uh, I forgot to mention that… this is a strip club that…”

I shake my head waiting for more in her response.

She bites her lip, “It’s basically a place where mobsters hang out. No biggie [Y/N]”

My mouth drops, “Are you fucking kidding?!”

Cesar is starting to get anxious.

“They’re playing good music, can we go inside please?”he asks while tugging on Alex’s arm.

She adds, “Yeah, we’re never gonna see these people again [Y/N], so chill. You can take a taxi back if you want but it’s best if we stick together.” Cesar pulls her arm and they both head through the door without me. I could tell they were annoyed with me. Anyway, I was not walking in that alley alone, so I decided to walk up to the door and take a deep breath, not knowing what to expect to see when they open.

As I open the door, all I could think was that Alex was right.. the club looked totally boujee. Everyone except for the strippers looked like they had loads of cash. I see Alex and Cesar getting down on the dance floor. It’s not a big place, you can see everyone in there, I try not to make eye contact with anyone. I go straight to my friends who are dancing their lives away. I touch their shoulders, “I’m gonna go get a drink.” They nod, they don’t request anything, I have a feeling they’re butthurt because I was making such a big deal. Whatever. I start making my way towards the bar.

I’m inspecting the whole club while making my way to get a drink, the booths and tables were so extra, black leather and all. Each table had a strip pole, practically naked women are all pole dancing. I was surprised when I made it to the bar, it was pure marble, damn thank god I got dolled up today. I feel a hand grab my ass, and quickly remove the hand. I look to see a gentleman in about his late 40’s looking at my body so thirstily, he says “You’ve got a nice arse, sweetheart.”

I literally make a gagging face, “If you ever touch me again, I swear to God, I’ll punch you.”

He laughs in my face, the bartender sets his drinks down and he walks away.

The bartender throws his rag over his shoulder, “You sure are brave enough to be talking to the men in here like that.” I roll my eyes.

“Fuck that. There are a bunch of naked women in here and he has the audacity to grab my ass? No sir.” He laughs, and asks “What are you having sweetheart?” I start tapping my acrylic nails on the marble, and think for a second “Mmm, a tequila sunrise would be nice.”

He smiles, “You got it.” He walks away from me, and I decide to take a seat. I pull out my phone from my purse, and see a text from my mom “I miss you, hope you’re having a great time!” I smile, ahh how I missed that lady.

I’m start scrolling through instagram when I see a shot of vodka get set down in front of me. I’m confused, “I didn’t order that.” The bartender looks at me while still making my drink, “Ah, that shot was sent to you by that gentleman over there, at the VIP booth.”

I follow his pointed finger and find myself staring at the largest booth in the club. I see two gentlemen sitting watching me stare back at them.

In the distance, I can only make out a blonde with blue eyes. My vision is blurry, I have shitty eyesight, I forgot to get a new prescription in LA before heading to London. I squint my eyes, and see the other gentleman next to the blonde raise his glass at me, I look back and pick up my shot and raise it back at him. He nods slightly and drinks his shot, and I follow. I turn back to towards the bartender who sets down my drink in front of me, he looks at me worried, “Be careful with that one. He’s dangerous. I can tell you’re not from around here.” I take my drink, “What do you mean?” Before he could answer he is interrupted by a voice I don’t recognize.

“I couldn’t help but to notice you from across the bar darling.” My eyes widen and I turn my back to see a brunette with slicked back hair and his left eyebrow combed up. His suit is a dark burgundy, he’s so polished and I could smell his cologne. So hot. He grabs my hand and kisses my knuckles, he looks up at me and says “I seen how you handled that man who grabbed your arse..impressive.” I’m pretty sure I’m blushing.

I tug my hand away and set it back on my lap, “Well thank you. By the way, thanks for the drink.” I keep eye contact with him while my tequila sunrise finds its way to my mouth. He responds, “Why don’t you come join me and my mate Harrison at our table? I can buy you more of those drinks.” He smirks, waiting for my response, I pull away from my drink,“You can’t buy me sir, I can buy my own drinks, thank you very much.” I stand up and begin to walk away until I feel him grab my wrist, “I’m not trying to buy you darling, I just want to talk to you..”

Fuck, he was charming. I’ll give him that but the bartender literally just told me that he was dangerous. He brought my wrist up and hecradles my hand, both of his hands are holding it now while my left hand is holding my drink. I see Alex staring at me while she is dancing with Cesar, she mouths the words “GO WITH HIM!” I look back at him and smile. My first thought is what the bartender had said: 

 “Don’t go with him. He’s dangerous.” 

But then I start to think about what Alex said earlier,

 “You’re never going to see these people again.”

She was right, fuck it. I mean, I’m probably never going to talk to this guy ever again after tonight. I make eye contact with him, I pull my hand away from his and take the cherry out of my drink. I bite into the cherry and watch him smirk as he rubs his thumb across his bottom lip. I take another sip, “Fine, I’ll hang out with you at your table.” He grins, “Perfect,” he takes my hand again and puts it on his shoulder. 

He starts to lead the way back to his booth, the stranger turns around and the first thing I see are his lips “Sorry poppet, I didn’t even introduce myself. I’m Tom. Tom Holland.”

Well that was super exciting, please leave me some feedback! The next part should be out in a couple of days! Much Love, -Amy 💛

PART 2

[fibula-rasa]

Cosplay the Classics: Greta Garbo

Greta Garbo was one of my very first favorite actresses. That perfectly magnetic face was a force even on a television screen. I set my VCR to tape every movie she was in as they appeared on TCM, then bought them all on DVD as they were released. In high school, a few of my friends even crafted Garbo-themed doodads for me because she wasn’t plastered on all manner of goods like Audrey Hepburn, James Dean or Marilyn Monroe were in the early 2000s. Though I didn’t put voice to it at the time, seeing a woman whose romance so clearly knew no gender was formative for me.

Garbo is by no means obscure, but even more people need to be watching her films. Don’t fret! Filmstruck to the rescue: Greta Garbo is their star of the week!

No time like the present to try my hand at a wearable Swedish Sphinx look. I aimed for late-silent Garbo, a la The Kiss (1929) and The Mysterious Lady (1928).

Taken and collaged by photographer Clarence Sinclair Bull in 1931, this photo spurred on the sticky nickname.

The Face of Garbo

The face of Garbo has inspired odes in spiritual, philosophical, and psychoanalytical terms over the past century and, yeah, it would be way above my pay grade to contribute to that canon. In lieu of that, let’s learn a little bit about how Garbo’s image was constructed.

When Greta Garbo made the trek from Sweden to Hollywood in 1925, she had all the raw ingredients to be a screen star. A face with no bad angles that still and film cameras can love alike is rare. All Garbo needed was a bit of polish to marry her outward appearance to the languid grace of her performance style.

Off screen, Garbo was often reported as wearing unassuming baggy trousers, loafers, and oversized sweaters. A thoroughly uncomplicated person. On screen, Adrian collaborated closely with her to style and design fashions that would follow her every move in seventeen of her feature films.

While I didn’t do a full-body look this time around, I tried to choose a top that would slouch with my posture.

Garbo’s makeup is beautifully consistent across her fifteen years in Hollywood. The application evolved as camera and projection technology advanced, but the shapes remained the same. Starting with Torrent (1926) and her first few silents, her makeup was drawn in higher contrast with heavier lines. In the late silents and her first few talkies, the lines were softened with more gradients in her eyeshadow and lipstick, and film cameras and lighting rigs began to capture more subtle gradations of light and dark. Throughout the rest of the 1930s all the way to Two-Faced Woman (1941), the lines were thinner and more delicate and paired with further shading, but still with a graphic effect.

from Torrent (1926), The Mysterious Lady (1928), and Conquest (1937)

The theme of her iconic look was a dreamy sensuousness, and I personally love that her makeup design is so simple. If applied properly it could be flattering on any face.

Read on after THE JUMP

Garbo wore a heavy line across her lashline, usually the darkest drawn element on her face. If you had the eyelashes of a mortal this line would be too heavy, but we’re talking about Garbo here. I put on a full strip of falsies. 

The line elongates the eye, much like a cat-eye flick, but it extends down and out to create a sultry-but-kind look. (Note: this liner style is currently en vogue in Japan right now & I think it’s overdue for a comeback on this side of the Pacific.) On the outer edge of the lower lashline a lighter line is drawn from the end of the upper line to the lower lashline, forming a small triangle. This finishes off the elongation of the eye. To make it more striking, you can fill in the triangle with a lighter nude liner.

On the lid, Garbo’s crease was emphasized sharply. Across the makeup eras described above, first it was a deep line that met the eyeliner in the corners, then a more natural gradient still with a cut crease, and then back to a distinct line, but applied with a much lighter hand.

from Flesh and the Devil (1926), Anna Christie (1930), and Two-Faced Woman (1941) 

Her eyebrows were plucked and drawn thinly, as was the style at the time. Regardless, Garbo usually followed her natural brow shape.

Garbo’s skin was described as remarkably flawless; Louise Brooks called it “petal-like.” So, a good powder is a must. Reportedly, she used a Max Factor foundation with a silver tint so the light would reflect strongly off her face. (This also probably explains why in a few of her films her face is so much brighter than her usually quite tan neck and shoulders.)

For blush, I used a simple dusty pink because her cheeks are much fuller than mine--so I didn’t want to add dimension. Dusty pink was also her favorite color. Like really.

Garbo’s New York apartment was decked out ceiling to carpet almost exclusively in rose pink!

Her lips were lined in a single tone following her natural shape. My lips are fuller but not as wide as hers so I drew them out a bit at the edges with a lip brush and filled in the shape in this method:

from The Kiss (1929)

Over the past year or so, I’ve experimented a lot with wet-set curling to improve my vintage chops. Many 1930s styles are difficult to achieve and Garbo’s is the least fussy hairstyle I’ve attempted from the period. So, even before the effortless long bob Garbo sported for much of her life, her styling was simple.

There are some accounts that she was a little erratic about working on her image but it must have been some relief that Garbo had close collaborators ironing out the glamor to accentuate her own art. Garbo took acting very seriously without much interest in being a movie star. Time has told that with Adrian as a costumer, Max Factor as a makeup designer, Clarence Sinclair Bull as a portrait photographer, and William H. Daniels as a cinematographer, an adequately sublime, timeless image was created to match her sublime, timeless performances.

Garbo’s Reach

Often when people talk about Marilyn Monroe’s predecessors, they can’t seem to get past her fluffy blonde hair. They draw endless parallels to Jean Harlow, with whom she shares little more than a hair color. Monroe herself idolized Garbo. And it shows if you’re looking for it.

All together, the lazy/sexy ideal is embodied by both women. Where Monroe usually infused this spirit into dizzy comedic roles, Garbo primarily put it to use playing women of mystery. Suffice it to say, both stars have reached an iconic status at least in part because their roles were intertwined so cleverly with their respective public images.

I look to Monroe’s eye makeup as the dead giveaway. Monroe and her makeup artist, Whitey Snyder, created much the same shapes but with gentler lines.

When Garbo first emerged with her long bob, it was admired by fans, but magazine writers were quick to point out that this was unflatteringly long and advised that only Garbo could pull it off. Likewise, Monroe was put down in the press for her too-long unstylish hair--some journalists even comparing her to a dog. (The ideal then being closer to Elizabeth Taylor’s neatly coiffed short curls.) Funny that both styles are considered almost universally flattering today.

According to Katharine Cornell, when Garbo was considering a return to the screen she wanted to star alongside Monroe. Garbo confided that she wanted to play Dorian Gray with Monroe as Sibyl Vane. If you’re queer-hearted like myself (and Garbo) it’s devastating that we never got that film.

I suppose I’ll sign off now with tears in my eyes for what could have been and for the mutual appreciation that Marilyn Monroe probably never knew about.

[gladblackwoman-blog]

It’s the Climb!

   Hello GLADies? Okay I’m trying to think up a cute name to call my (less than 10) followers lol. GLADies is all I could come up with. Let me know in the comments if it’s a keeper or if you have any ideas of something better. I would like to hear them.

   Okay, now on to the subject at hand. I promise this blog will be a lot lighter than the last two. Also, full disclaimer this blog is not sponsored in anyway or serving as an ad for the products that will be discussed.

   As of now I hope you are all aware of my current journey to a healthier mind and body. If you are not, I encourage you to go read my last blog posts. On this journey my goals are to: rebuild and grow my relationship with Christ, put an end to my hair pulling, maintain a solid workout routine, and (a new edition) focus on my career goals  and reaching them. Now hopefully me discussing what steps I am taking to see all of these things happen will help someone else, but I am also documenting this to be a reminder for me whenever I feel like I’m veering off of my path.

 Maintaining a Healthy Relationship With Christ - This is a bit scary, but this may be the hardest out of all of my goals to accomplish outside of a community! Yes I said it!! So my number 1 piece of advice to give myself and others is to find a great community and stick with them. Now I know this isn’t an easy task, but it is possible. These people will be your backbone in this process!

Saying goodbye to Trich - So I don’t know if any other people with Trich will read this or even people who wear fake lashes, but I don’t know about you, but I hate eyelash glue and I hate wearing fake lashes. I love the look of actually having eyelashes but I do not have the patience for falsies all of the time; I would rather have lashes of my own. I would also rather not take to pulling out my eyelashes and eyebrows as a relief to my anxiety because it truly just worsens it. So a couple things have been very helpful for me in accomplishing this. The first thing that I found to be helpful was a eyelash growth serum made by Younique called Moodstruck Esteem Lash Serum. A friend of mine sells this product, and I was pretty skeptical about it but it is proving to be helpful. Now my lash growth isn’t exactly speedy, but remember my lashes have been subjected to years of pulling and plucking, so the fact that my lashes are growing at all is a blessing! The main thing that Younique has been the most helpful with is keeping my hands away from my eyes; I’ll explain. Don’t let this scare you lol but if you get the product in your eye it does sting a bit, ok a lot. So whenever I try to pull my lashes after I have put the product on my lashes it burns, which is a great motivation to stop pulling. Another source of helping me put an end to my Trich which I am super excited about is a support group. So the support group I am a part of is an imessage group of women ranging from 22 - 50s and right now we are all challenging each other to go 60 days pull less or pull free. This has been really comforting for me in knowing that I am not alone in my Trich!

Healthy Life - So I could say a lot about this, Lord, but to avoid having the longest blog in history I am going to limit myself to a few helpful tips and I will touch base on this topic in the future for sure. So, I also have a friend who is a Plexus ambassador which is a company that provides multiple products to help you become your healthiest self and I am currently using the Slim+Boost combo which is amazingly helping curb my bad cravings and boosting my energy level. Now one, this product actually works, and two, I spent money on it so of course I am motivated to make the most of this journey. The thing that has actually been helping me the most in getting up and going to the gym is waking up early. Yes, getting my butt out of the bed has been the most helpful thing. Now I don’t know how to help you get out of bed because I really have to for myself to stand up out of my bed some mornings, but obviously try to get some sleep, and yes I mean more than 3-5 hours. Even if you workout at night, make sure you are getting sleep and still try to wake up early to have a good start to your day. Oh yeah and drink more water!!

Being a Boss - Same as fitness I could talk about this for days (future blog to come). I have this mantra that is “I need to be famous tomorrow!” Now this is a simple and joking way for me to say, “I need to be on my grind today so I can be where I want to be in life career wise.” This is definitely going to have to be another blog but basically, surprise, surprise I want to be a writer, specifically for television and film. Writer is like a happy pill for me, so I just continue to write, whether it be a blog post or a movie script.

  Yeah, so this is how I am attempting to kick but in my everyday life and how I will become a boss! Peace and Love! Until next time GLADies :)

[skincare-us-blog]

Dee Poku, Women's Advocate + Entrepreneur

New Post has been published on http://skincareee.com/dee-poku-womens-advocate-entrepreneur/

Dee Poku, Women's Advocate + Entrepreneur

“I grew up in London, but lived in Ghana for a few years, which was a very formative experience for me. My parents missed home and wanted their children to have the same experience that they had. I think particularly as a woman of color, it was very grounding for me to be in that environment where everybody looked like me. I was able to aspire to be anything I wanted to be, without worrying about any sort of impediment to my success. In Ghana, education is everything so I really thought about my studies in a very serious way.

I was a young teenager when I went back to London, which is a very insecure time in anyone’s life, particularly for young girls. I was different, I had picked up a bit of an accent, and was a bit of a nerd. As far from being in a cool crowd as you can get. [Laughs] Going to university was a revelation for me. It was very freeing. I initially wanted to study chemical engineering, but I ended up switching to math. It’s so interesting that now there’s this push to girls into tech…at the time I remember thinking, what am I doing here? Out of my class of 150 people there were only 2, 3 girls. It didn’t feel like a very comfortable place for me to be in.

CAREER My initial plan was to go into finance—which would have made my parents very happy—but I just had a change of heart and I decided to take a year off. I think I’ve always tried to be creative and I was boxed into a science box. I interned at this fashion PR company, called Lynne Franks, and then they offered me a job. Its claim to fame is the founder Lynne was the inspiration for one of the main characters in Absolutely Fabulous… Do you know that TV show? It’s actually really funny. Then I moved out of fashion and into film marketing, which is where I spent most of my career for 15 years. Before I had any commitments in my life, I would just sit in movie theaters all weekend long and just watch movies. I found my calling in them. I was very lucky in respect that I got to work with such incredible filmmakers. I’ve worked on so many good movies—Lost in Translation, Brokeback Mountain, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind…

For a while, I was using my marketing background to consult for various non-profit companies—quite a few in the women’s space. That ended up segueing into the global branded company I founded, WIE, Women in Inspiration and Enterprise. It kind of happened by accident. I was at The Important Dinner for Women in 2010, which brought together all these powerful, impressive women—Queen Rania, Wendi Murdoch, Christy Turlington, Hillary, Oprah, you name it. We were all asked to make a pledge, to go off and do something with it. I was just so in awe of the success, intelligence and experience I was surrounded by and thought how incredible that women like me and behind me can have this sort of access in such a rarified environment. We started out with just one conference, and it has since grown into a network of women with a variety of different events designed to create those connections and learn from one another. I didn’t know I had a voice in making a difference in that space, and then the more I got to learn about other people, the more it inspired me to do that, too. Ultimately I just want to see parity in the workplace, more women in leadership positions, founding and growing major companies.

SKINCARE My philosophy is that beauty absolutely comes from within. I always look my best when I am looking after myself. For me it starts more with little rituals—diet, lemon water in the morning, pure cranberry juice—things that are constantly cleansing. I don’t drink coffee at all, I like to drink green tea. My skin is really in-between and when I am not looking out after myself, I can breakout. I just got a breakout today. This week I had a gazillion things going on, and I didn’t sleep much or eat well—it’s just that simple. I was like, ‘Great, I have a photoshoot and a zit.’ [Laughs]

I started using Ole Henriksen years ago because their headquarters was right by my apartment in LA. I used to go there for facials. In the morning, I use the On The Go Cleanser [ed note: discontinued] with a mitt and then once a week, I use the Clarisonic brush. I also use the Aesop Fabulous Face Cleanser because it smells really nice, and it’s not too harsh. I think I’m always looking for things that are not too drying or stripping for my skin. I gravitate towards clean beauty and I love Gwyneth and Goop. [Laughs] I love the philosophy, so that’s what I started to use and that worked well for me. I really like the Replenishing Night Cream, but I have run out. I also like using the Skinceuticals CE Ferulic Serum, which a facialist told me about. Sometimes at night I will use micellar water and wipe that off, because I can’t be bothered washing my face. I also like to use the No7 Total Renewal Micro-Dermabrasion Exfoliator once a week. That’s from my English days, its super grainy. I also like the Boots Botanicals Ionic Clay Mask which I use once a month.

MAKEUP In my fashion PR days, I experimented with makeup more, although I don’t know that I did it very well. [Laughs] Now, it’s about finding that confidence in yourself and knowing what you look like. It comes with age, it’s like when you know what suits you when you go to the store and pull out what’s best for you.

If I wear foundation, it’s always so hard to get the right shade so I mix two. I like the Make Up For Ever HD Foundation in #178 and the Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics Tinted Moisturizer in R5. A makeup artist first suggested that I mixed them and I was thrilled. I used to have a fear of photoshoots because makeup artists just never get it right on my skin. I mean unless you’ve got Pat McGrath, it’s not the right shade and you just have to kind of take your own.

My lashes aren’t very long, so I am always looking for anything that enhances my eyelashes and eyes. I find that Maybelline brands are just really good. I use the Maybelline Falsies Push Up Angel Mascara. It’s not a brush, it’s a thin comb but it really coats the top and bottom lashes. I’ve run out but I really like the Bobbi Brown Long-Wear Gel Eyeliner that comes in a pot with a brush. I do the whole of the top and half of the bottom. And I love it. People are always talking about Ruby Woo, but it’s really the best lipstick ever invented. It’s not too bright, not too pink, it’s a deep, rich red. Sometimes I don’t wear any makeup during the day and then if I have a meeting or if I go out, I put mascara and lipstick on and that does me fine.

HAIR I cut my hair last year and it’s the best. Just so freeing. I was definitely someone who liked to hide behind their hair. I just felt I couldn’t pull off short hair, and my husband really thought that I could. He has fancier hairdresser than I do—so does my son—they both use Mika at Salon AKS. They were having their hair cut and my son was just like, ‘Mommy get your hair cut, too,’ and suddenly that was that. There’s still such a gap in the market and there really aren’t any great salons for black hair. I find the women from the Caribbean and Islands just get it, so I go to Harlem for a great, cheap blowdry or braids. I really like the Aveda Be Curly Shampoo and their Brilliant Conditioner. I also use the Organic Root Stimulator Hair Mayonnaise as a really good home treatment, it’s very enriching and puts moisture back in your hair. The Redken Glass Look Smoothing Complex is great when I am using a straightening iron and then I would use the Living Proof Frizz Nourishing Oil to protect it.

BODY Having moved to Brooklyn three months ago, my routine has definitely changed. I have a 5 year old who’s very active—he wants to ride his bike, scooter, play basketball and run around obviously here he can do those things. The thing about LA or London is that you have a garden, and parks on every corner, it’s just different. But I love it here, I’m definitely a city girl. I’ve lived in cities my whole life, I crave that hustle and bustle.

Right now we’re very into oils. When my son was born in 2012, I did so much research into products for him that I could use as well. We use these cocoa butters from Everyday Shea, they’re very simple and great. There’s this brand called Daughter of the Land, and it’s an organic, fair trade oil that is great to use all over the face and body. They have three different ones with different grades of heaviness and I combine them all. I do like fragrances though. Over the years I’ve gone through four bottles of the Bvlgari. It’s really great and clean. I also love the Cartier So Pretty. I used to wear it all the time although I think it was discontinued, and I certainly haven’t seen it in America.

Once in awhile and I’ve been meaning to go back, I get facials with Mamie, she’s kind of the one. She’s great with black skin and there are a lot of people that go to her, she has very fancy clients. I try to go to her every few months for a deep clean facial, and I feel like it lasts a long time. I love, love saunas, Hammam, anything with steam. I used to go to a spa on Greenwich street in Tribeca—Aire Ancient Baths. I also used to be obsessed with Russian Turkish Baths. It wasn’t the most glamorous place, but I loved it.

I think that in general, the more I can incorporate my beauty and health routine into my day to day, the better it works for me. I don’t exercise that much, I’m very simple. I used to run and do yoga, but that had fallen by the wayside a little bit. I would rather not take a car or subway than go to gym, so I just walk everywhere and take the stairs. It’s cheaper, and you can multitask. I am about to try—just because I’ve been hearing so much about her and following her on Instagram—Taryn Toomey’s The Class. It looks amazing. I’m about to give that a go, maybe I’ll do it by the time this comes out. [Laughs]”

—as told to ITG

Dee Poku photographed by Tom Newton in New York on June 2, 2017.