#i pushed really hard to get this next part out during the weekend but didnt have time so here surprise monday upload

[crystalninjaphoenix]

Resurgence

A Jacksepticeye Fanfiction

Part Twelve: The Next Course of Action

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Summary: A week later, Jackie and Sam manage to find Marvin, and a new lead. But then they’re interrupted. And things quickly go downhill from there, as static fills his mind...

(It’s been too long, I missed this. I missed writing these overarching plots and chapters, I should write this more, haha)

Time passed. The four remaining boys settled into a routine. Get up, scour the Internet, go to work (or look for a job for the two who didn’t have one already), come back home and resume the search. Schneep still didn’t have his apartment back, so he roomed with Jackie. JJ insisted that he was fine at home alone, but almost every night Chase would open his door and quietly let Jameson inside to sleep over before returning to his house the first thing next morning.

Sam stayed with Jackie. They got really attached to him really quickly. When he fell asleep, he always woke up with them curled up on his chest, glowing softly. And when he went out on patrol at night, looking for crime and also keeping an eye out for the kids, Sam followed. Jackie didn’t mind. The little eye could look out for themselves, and it was nice to have company on these cold nights in the city.

It was a week before they found a lead. Or rather, a lead found them. Jackie was out on patrol in the northern part of the city—the most run-down part. Most of the buildings here were abandoned, and there were a lot of empty warehouses that nobody used anymore. Or at least, nobody was supposed to. The entire section was rife with criminals, to the point where Jackie actually tried to avoid it if possible. He was just one man, and he was outnumbered in this area. But...to be honest, he was starting to get a bit frantic in his search for the kids. They all were. A week missing was never good, but in these circumstances, with the glitch on the loose...

Jackie was sitting on the roof of one of the buildings, which might have been an old apartment complex before it was abandoned. His legs dangled over the edge. He sighed, and rubbed his eyes under his mask. Sam flew in front of his face, pupil wide and radiating concern. “What? No, I’m fine, Sam,” he insisted. “Just tired.” Sam flicked their tail, as if to say, yeah, sure. “No, really! It’s been a long night, and nothing much has happened. Nothing has happened...at all really.”

Sam gently bumped against him, emitting a cheerful energy. Jackie smiled a bit. “Yeah, I’m keeping up that positive mental attitude. Gotta have hope. Gotta make sure the others have it as well.” He had to. He was the most optimistic one of them all; if he gave up, they would follow, and they couldn’t afford that.

Sam’s glow dimmed a bit, then re-brightened. They darted away, heading toward the roof exit of the building before turning back around and looking at Jackie expectantly. “What is it?” The hero frowned, puzzled. “You want to...show me something?” Sam bobbed once. Jackie clambered to his feet. “Alright, lead the way, then.”

Sam led Jackie back down through the abandoned building and out onto the street. Once there, they zoomed off in a seemingly random direction. “Wh—Sam, wait up!” The little eye was incredibly fast sometimes. Jackie sprinted to keep up. Sam didn’t slow down, not even at intersections. They turned and dashed in a twisting route, until Jackie began to suspect they didn’t know where they were going.

At one point Jackie turned a corner and ran head-first into someone in a purple hoodie. He didn’t stop to apologize, mostly because there was no time if he wanted to keep up with Sam, and also partly because the patrons of this city section didn’t usually look too kindly on vigilantes and he didn’t want to draw attention to himself. Not too long after that, Sam took a side street and darted into an alleyway. A second later, Jackie heard a voice: “Who the—Sam?! What the hell are you doing here?!”

Jackie paused for a moment in shock, then ducked into the alley. “Marvin? Is that you?”

The alley was small, big enough for two people to walk side-by-side but not much bigger than that, and also dark. Sam’s green glow helped Jackie see the outline of a person. “Jackie?” the familiar voice gasped. “I gotta—hang on a sec.” He muttered something Jackie couldn’t make out, and suddenly five glowing orbs sprang into existence, giving off a soft yellow-green light. Jackie blinked a bit to let his eyes adjust. Now he could see that somehow, against all odds, he’d run right into Marvin. His mask was on, and he tapped his wand nervously against his palm. “What’re you doing here?” he asked.

“Well, I was out on patrol, then all of a sudden Sam went off and I followed because, y’know, seemed important. I think they knew you were here?” The eye was currently swishing around the floating lights, looking illegally cute.

“Okay, wow, uh—I didn’t even know I was gonna be here. That’s impossible.”

“The fuck do you mean?”

“I mean that I have no plan,” Marvin admitted. “I’ve just been kinda...wandering around the city, and the area around it. What’ve you guys been doing? How are the others?”

Jackie sighed. “Well, things could be going better. Chase is obviously a mess. He’s...having a bad time right now. I don’t think he’s eating, and he’s oversleeping a lot. I can tell something is up with him, but he won’t tell me anything. And JJ started having nightmares again—”

“What?!” The glowing orbs briefly flared before dimming again. “Oh fuck, sorry, didn’t mean to do that.”

“Nah, it’s okay. But, uh, yeah. At least he’s been telling us about them this time. That’s progress!”

Marvin looked doubtful at Jackie’s falsely cheery tone. “I see...and, uh, Schneep? How’s he holding up?”

“Not...too well,” Jackie said slowly. “He’s trying to get his job at the hospital back, but apparently they replaced him with an amateur and he’s pretty angry ‘bout that. And the other day, I was doing some cooking and he was offering to help, but I pointed at him and said ‘you go sit down and wait, I’m doin’ this cause of friendship,’ only I, uh, was holding a knife and the time, so when I pointed it at him he freaked out. I...really didn’t mean to, I didn’t even think about it, but...”

“Jesus fucking christ,” Marvin muttered. “I leave for a week and everything goes to shit.”

“Y’know somehow I doubt anything much would’ve changed if you’d been here all this time. Didn’t you once tell me that you liked to fuck things up?” Jackie’s mouth twitched. “Those exact words.”

“I don’t remember that, but yeah, sounds like something I’d say,” Marvin shrugged. “What about the kids? Am I off the hook yet?”

“I think you should remember that you put yourself on the hook in the first place. You were like a gullible fish.”

“No, I was a fish that was like ‘yeah, Chase can’t outrun the cops, I have a better shot.’ But anyway, is there any progress?”

Jackie shook his head. “You have no idea how many deep web searches Chase and I have ran. I’m gonna end up attracting the wrong kind of attention, again. Also, I’ve been looking for them at night, y’know, like I’m doing now. But nothing. Do you have anything, or has your lack of a plan gotten in the way?”

“Hey, don’t underestimate my improv skills!” Marvin wiggled his fingers, unintentionally causing the orbs to flicker. “Ya know there’s a whole magic underground? I didn’t either, but they’re surprisingly helpful!”

“Uhh, when you mention something underground my instincts scream ‘illegal!’ at me. Should I be concerned?”

“Nah, they’re cool. Been around for decades, mostly trade spellbooks and talismans. It’s just underground ‘cause, well, most people don’t believe in magic.”

Jackie squinted at him. Marvin wasn’t quite looking him in the eyes. “Really?”

“Yes, really,” Marvin insisted. “Anyway, if you know where to look you can find all kinds of cool shit. And...I might have found something?”

Jackie’s heart leaped. “Really?”

“Yeah!” Marvin nodded vigorously. “Okay, so, you remember the scrying spell and how it went wrong?”

“Vividly,” Jackie muttered.

“So I was wondering if that was because of him, or if I just didn’t know what I was doing, or something else. I did some digging around, and found two explanations for why it blew up. One, he was able to catch me watching and basically warped the connection until it broke. Entirely possible, even plausible, but there’s another option. We reached the kids perfectly well, but they weren’t in this reality.”

“Uh, what?”

“Shut up, I’m explaining.” Marvin flicked his wand, and a simple diagram appeared, made of green light and hovering in the air like a hologram. It was a simple sphere, with several flat circles floating around it, connected by thin streams of misty green. “Okay, so this globe is the world, right?” Marvin tapped it with his wand. “It’s the universe. We live here. But these things—” he tapped one of the circles “—are what we can call pocket dimensions. They’re different realities, connected to ours. Some are constant, some appear sporadically, sometimes you can summon the entrance, sometimes the entrances open on their own and you can accidentally walk through. They’re all pretty small though, the largest one being the equivalent of a small country in size. Following me so far?”

“Uh, yeah, I think so.”

“Okay, so here’s the kicker: you can’t scry into a pocket dimension. If you try, then the spell will backfire on you, violently. Pretty similar to what happened to us. And we haven’t been having luck with finding Bobby and Trevor, have we? Maybe for a good reason?”

“Wait. Wait wait wait.” Jackie’s mind was whirling. Sam stopped their frolicking and settled down on the top of his head like they could hear his mile-a-minute thoughts. “You’re saying they might be in one of these?!”

“Exactly!” Marvin shouted triumphantly. “Seems like something he would do, right? And it would also makes sense why we couldn’t find Schneep those months, too! We looked fucking everywhere!”

“Oh my god,” Jackie breathed. No wonder there was no sign of the kids. He’d been starting to suspect they were somewhere else in the world entirely, but maybe they weren’t in the world at all. “And-and can you get into this pocket dimension? Is that possible?”

“I’ve been working on a few tricks,” Marvin grinned. “I’m trynta figure out how to open entrances. I almost had it night before last, almost got into the mirror dimension, but it didn’t stay open very long. And there are a couple more tricks, especially when it comes to, say, forcing your way into a hostile pocket. But I’m sure that if I just keep practicing we can at least try to find them.”

“Marvin that is fantastic news!” Jackie rushed forward and wrapped his arms around the magician, squeezing tight.

“Whoa, hey! Non-consensual hug! I need to breathe here!” Marvin didn’t actually sound too upset.

“Sorry,” said Jackie, not the least bit sorry. He let go and stepped back. “It just—god, finally, some progress! It feels so good!”

“You tell me. It’s only been a few days and I’m already sick of being an outlaw. Obviously we need to wait a bit longer, but I—what’s Sam doing?”

Jackie turned around. Sam had been dislodged from their perch when he attack-hugged Marvin. Now they were staying completely still in the air, as if suspended their by a wire, facing the entrance to the alleyway. Their optic nerve was sticking upward, like a cat raising its tail at a threat, and they’d started glowing brighter. “Uh...I dunno. I’ve never seen them do this before.” Jackie crept forward, glad his super suit boots muffled his footsteps. The tip of Marvin’s wand flared a dark green, then Marvin walked forward, completely quiet. The two of them exchanged looks, silently agreeing on a plan. When they reached the alley entrance, Jackie held up three fingers. Then two. Then one, and—

In unison the two of them jumped out onto the street, Marvin going left with his wand at the ready and Jackie leaping right. Immediately Jackie saw someone and tackled them, falling to the ground. The person yelped. “Get off me!” Jackie rolled away and stood up, but remained at the ready. It was the same guy he’d run into earlier, in the purple hoodie. But now he had more time to look, and realized he recognized him.

Marvin looked his direction and scowled. “Oh fan-fucking-tastic, it’s one of those detectives.”

It was the shorter, dark-haired one, Detective Akela. He rubbed the back of his head where it hit the pavement and glared up at Marvin. “Yes, it’s one of those detectives. I’d say it’s good to see you again, Mr. Moore, but it’s not.”

“The feeling is mutual, dickface.”

“Marvin, no,” Jackie said sternly. “You’re not jumping straight into insults.”

“I can jump straight into whatever I want, the dude tried to arrest Chase!” Marvin yelled.

“Well, yeah!” Jackie yelled back. “Because that’s his job! Maybe if we didn’t antagonize the police, they wouldn’t arrest any of us!”

“Fuck that! I can antagonize anyone who goes after you guys, I don’t care what their job is!”

“You two do realize I’m still here, right?” Akela said, climbing to his feet.

Jackie’s head whipped toward him. The detective seemed like he’d been listening for a while... “How much of that did you hear?!” he asked, slightly panicked.

Akela hesitated. “I didn’t hear anything. I was just passing by and you two jumped me.”

“Bullshit!” Marvin spat. “Sam started acting weird, they must’ve realized you were eavesdropping on us.”

“Who the hell is Sam?” Akela demanded.

Marvin and Jackie glanced back down the alley, but the eye seemed to have disappeared. “They’re probably hiding,” Jackie muttered. “But the point is, we know you heard us talking down there. You’re kind of an awful liar for a detective.”

Akela looked like he wanted to keep fighting, but then his shoulders slumped and he seemed to give up. “Yeah. I know. Lydia always handles that part. I’m more of an observer, or a, um, thinker. She finds the pieces, I put ‘em together. So, uh, yeah, I heard pretty much everything that went on in there. You bumped into me and I thought, ‘hey, there’s the vigilante, better follow him!’ because I’m...an idiot, I guess. And I may have...caught a lot of that.”

“Wow, you told us all that way too easily,” Marvin said in a biting voice. “What are you even doing here?! Nobody lives in this area! And out this late?!”

“It was a shortcut, alright?!” Akela snapped. “Not all of us have his luck—” he pointed at Jackie “—and get an apartment of our own in a central part of the city! And some of us work late shifts, and have to walk through the deadly part of town to get back home so we can sleep!”

Jackie suddenly became very still and silent. “How do you know where I live?”

Akela went pale. “I—well, I—I mean, I heard you—you both seem familiar with each other, and also, we-we-we did background checks on most of you, so I’m pretty familiar with your faces at this point, and, uh, you mentioned the others, and I was there—”

“Fuck!” Marvin shouted, sparks flying from the end of his wand. Akela jumped back. “Fucking perfect! Now he knows who you are! Now he knows where I am! Now everything’s fucking awful!”

“Marvin for god’s sake, calm down!” Jackie snapped. “He’s not gonna tell anyone, right?” He glared at Akela. “Right?”

Akela looked away, putting his hands in his hoodie pocket. “I...don’t know. At first I thought I would have to, what with the Brody kids missing and you confessing...I thought I would hear some information that might find them, and break the case. But then you two started talking about weird shit, and it might be code but you seem like you’re trying to find the kids...and now I’m just confused.”

Jackie sighed. “Look, we’re not the bad guys here. Marvin isn’t the bad guy. He just wanted to protect his friends. And I know you’ve got that-that video footage, that you thinks proves everything, but it doesn’t. We’re on the case as much as you are, and we know a whole hell of a lot more than you do. It would be safer if you stayed out of it.”

He glanced at Marvin to see if he would back him up, but Marvin was staring suspiciously at Akela’s hoodie pocket. “Do you...have something in there?” he asked slowly.

“Just my phone,” Akela hurried to respond.

“Well I can see you playing with it through the fabric. Why are you doing that?”

Akela took a step backward, and that only confirmed Marvin’s suspicions. In a flash, quite literally, he was directly in front of the detective, who was struggling to pull away as Marvin tried to get into his pocket. Only a few moments of wrestling later, and Marvin backed away, holding a black smart phone in his hand.

Jackie gaped. “Marvin, I was just trying to explain we’re not the bad guys! You’re not helping when you do shit like this!”

“Dude, he was recording us!” Marvin showed the phone’s screen to Jackie. “He got a lot of it too!”

“Give it back,” Akela growled.

“Or what? Do you have a gun on you or something? No, I don’t think so, otherwise you just would’ve confronted us instead of lurking in the shadows.” Marvin pursed his lips. “Now the question is, should I delete this video?”

“I’d like to point out that you two were hiding in the shadows, and I was on the streetlamp-lit sidewalk outside!” Akela countered. “Look, just, give me back my phone, with the video, and I won’t tell anyone about Mr. Parker’s midnight outings.”

“You make it sound so formal,” Jackie muttered.

Marvin looked at Jackie. “What d’you think? Should I delete it?”

Jackie hesitated. “I have no idea. I trust him, but...” he didn’t need to finish the sentence. That video could easily be used to identify Jackie as the vigilante, for anyone who was clever enough to put the pieces together like Akela did.

Marvin shrugged. “Oh well.” He tapped the delete button on the screen. Akela made a strange kind of squeak sound. “Guess it’s better safe than—” He cut himself off. His eyes widened as he stared at the screen.

“What is it?” Jackie asked.

“It—it came back,” Marvin breathed. “It came back.” He pressed delete again, only for the video to reappear once more. He tried again, with the same result. “It’s not going away!”

Akela’s eyes darted between Jackie and Marvin. “Why do you two look so worried? It’s just a glitch. Sometimes deleted photos or videos look like they come back, but they don’t actually. You guys win, okay? It’s gone forever.”

Suddenly, Marvin dropped the phone with a gasp. It landed screen-up on the pavement. The phone was glitching rapidly between different apps, lagging and breaking under a layer of white noise. It was letting off a faint sound of static that was steadily growing louder. At times, it almost seemed like voices—or laughter.

“Shit!” Jackie gasped. Marvin didn’t say anything, just pointed his wand at the phone. A concentrated beam of green lightning shot out and hit the phone in a flash of yellow sparks, breaking it into three pieces.

But the static didn’t stop.

Akela could only stare. “Why did you do that? No, how did you do that?! How the hell did you do that?!”

Marvin didn’t answer, only looked at Jackie with wide eyes. “He’s here.”

Jackie could feel his heart pounding out of his chest. But he nodded. “We need to leave. Now.”

“What’s going on?!” Akela sounded like he was trying to be brave, but there was a tremble in his voice. “Who’s ‘he?’ Why are you so scared—what the hell is that?!”

Sam had finally chosen this moment to come out of the alley where they were hiding. They flew over to Jackie and settled on his shoulder, radiating worry.

“That’s Sam,” Marvin said curtly. “Now listen close, detective.” He took a few steps forward and grabbed Akela by the shoulders. “You don’t know what’s going on. Keep it that way. The more you know, the more attention you draw, and you do not want his attention. Just go home, go to sleep, and forget tonight ever happened. Let us take care of this ourselves, because you have no idea what the fuck you’re getting into, and trust me when I say you don’t want to know. Now go.” He let go of Akela’s shoulders, but the detective could only gape up at him. He growled, then clapped his hands, causing a flurry of green sparks to fly outward. “Get out of here!” Akela jumped, then ran across the street, disappearing around a building corner.

The static was getting louder.

“We should split up,” Jackie said.

Marvin whirled on him. “Are you insane?! Have you seen any horror movie ever?! Splitting up is the worst kind of suicide in these situations!”

“Marvin shut up and listen to me!” Jackie shrieked. His tone quieted Marvin. “Look, he’s only one glitch—demon—entity thing. He probably can’t go after both of us at once. And I know, you’re gonna say we’re stronger together or something, and you’re right, but I—” Jackie swallowed. “I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you. If something happened to both of us, and I couldn’t do anything to stop it. Don’t make me watch that happen.”

Marvin was at a loss for words, for once. But he nodded. “I don’t get it, but...sure. If you want. Take Sam with you.” He started back down the alleyway. “And...be safe. I don’t think I could live with that either.” He was gone.

Jackie waited only a second before taking off in the other direction, Sam still on his shoulder. The sound of the static followed him, hissing in his ears no matter how fast he ran or how much he turned. Jackie didn’t let himself stop, just kept sprinting. He had to get to safety. Where was that again? Home? That sounded slightly better than anywhere else.

I͏t̀'͏͡͞s ̵̨a̸l̶̡l̵͝ ̡͏y̶̨͢ǫ́u̵͝r͏ ̸f̷̕á̀͠u͠l̨͢t̵͠

Jackie skidded to a halt in surprise, before immediately starting back up again. He could’ve sworn he heard...but he shook it off. Hearing words in white noise was not a good sign. Neither was seeing it in the corner of your vision, which totally wasn’t happening nope not at all. Hadn’t he already run down this street? Twice? He had no choice, he had to take a break and get his bearings.

He forced himself to stop again, panting. Sam fell off his shoulder and tumbled to the ground. They glowed weakly, their light...flickering. Dimming. They shivered weakly.

“Sam, are you alright?” Jackie gasped. The words came out slowly. He had to blink through the fog in his head. Sam looked up to him, trembling. The answer seemed to be no. 

I̵͝t̶̸̕'̶͏s̷͟ a̧l͝l̕͞͠ ỳ̸͡o̷̡͢ứŗ̸ ͢͠f̴au͞͝lt̛

“He’s not good for you, is he?” Jackie asked. Sam made a sort of half-bob in confirmation. “Sam, you have to go. You can fly a lot faster than I can run.” That made the little eye’s glow brighten a bit as they jumped up and hovered in the air. “No, Sam, go. The rest of the guys need you, don’t they? And I don’t want to imagine what’ll happen if he gets you.”

That didn’t faze Sam at all. They shot straight up to Jackie’s eye level, then flickered and dropped down a foot. “See?!” Jackie exclaimed.

I̴ţ̕'̢s̀ ̶̶͢a̵ll͟͏ ̷y̢͝o̢͡u̕͏r͝͝ ̷̢f̛a͏̶̷ù̕ļ̶̴t 

Yo̕͠u͝ ̵͏ḑ̧͢i̴̸d thi͝s

Jackie noticed he was shaking. Why was he doing that? Sam looked up at him with a concerned gaze. “Sam, you gotta go. Please,” Jackie pleaded. Sam stared at him blankly, their light flickering more and more. Then an air of determination came over them. With a sudden burst of energy, the eye darted forward, ramming right into Jackie’s chest with such force that he stumbled back a few steps. He gasped. He felt something warm deep within him; a burst of appreciation, he assumed, for Sam’s unwillingness to leave.

Sam’s light dimmed, and they dropped to the ground.

Jackie’s mouth suddenly felt really dry. “Sam?” There was no response. The hero knelt on the ground next to them. “Sam?! Are you okay?!” 

Į̛t'͢s̕ ̶a̢lĺ ͢yòu͟r͠͠ ̷̢fa̶u̶l͞t̶͟͠

The little eye didn’t move at all, their glow barely visible. Gently, Jackie scooped them up. They were the size of a tennis ball, but they seemed so much smaller. “Sam, please. Answer me!”

Y̛ǫ̵ù̴̡ ̢̧d͢id̷́̀ t̛̀͢h͟͝i̛s̶͡

“Sam, please I can’t have—I can’t have—not this too!”

I̛̩̮̗͈̝͔̩͡t̛̟̝͍'̧̳͓̗͖͉̜͔͎͞s̵̴̝͇̲̲̤ ̪̕̕a̯̭̻͔͝l̨̻ļ̙̜̮͖͍́ͅ ͉̻̫͕̮̝̩͞y̸̭͍̬̗̰̰̳̭̹o̶̸͕̖̪u̻̣̣r̳̥̱͍̱̝̫͠ ̵̙̠̗̙f̖̼͓a̗̖̬̩̙̪u̶͉̭͓̘͟l̴̠̱̲͉̲̼̠̜t̘̠̼

“I tried! I’m trying!”

Ý̸̯̻̬̬̝̱o̷͡҉̼͔̟̥u҉͡ ͕̙̙̥͢ͅd͈̤̤i̵̭͉͕̤͎̠̣d̪̘̻͢͡��̙̳̼̰ ̢͏̟͔͎̰͕̼͉͡ṯ̢̛̀h̴҉͉͉̯̘̖i̮̬̼͕̬͕̹̤̬̕͠s̮̹͎͎̖̥̤̦͡

Jackie felt tears in his eyes, and then—

It happened between one blink and the next. There was a man, kneeling on the sidewalk, holding a small green orb in his hands. And then? There was nothing but a few red shadows drifting in the wind and the sound of triumphant laughter.

[shipuu]

So i find tratie adorable so this how i think they got together

We are gonna make this realistic not that “fell in love when we were 16 and somehow managed to stay together through everything”. Nothing wrong with that trope. But like i said ~~realistic

Katherine gardner - originally from washington dc. She went to gerogetown uni.

She has always been passionate about the plants and first decided to major in Agricultural Studies, but then she didnt really like it.

So she switched to environmental studies. Not exactly about plants per se. But still related to the environment.

She sees the way humans are destroying the world and genuinely wants to help

Shes got good friends in college, sleeps around a little bit. Has a good relationship with her father.

Extremely hard working. Work ethic 1000000. Graduated with honors. Got a job at an enviromental consultancy firm in new york.

Travis off to college. I believe he went to a college in ny to be close to CHB and connor. Probably a community college seeing as he couldnt afford other unis

Nothing wrong with that. His relationship with his mom is rocky. So she wouldn’t be able to help out.

Majored in business administration. He takes it lightly his first year, seeing as how he isn’t used to the education system because he lived at CHB his whole life.

He genuinely wants to be successful. To have a life for himself and connor. So after first year kicks his butt, he works hard and raised his GPA the following years.

Extremely good at math and numbers. He steal messes around, playing pranks on people but nothing harmful. Also sleeps around a lot. (Nothing wrong with that)

Malcolm pace made an offhanded comment about how travis should start a new club at uni called “how to steal” and he considers it before shoving the idea away.

During the summer, he helps chiron with any business related things (tax forms, buying shirts, selling strawberries). Connor and him still play a lottttt of pranks

Graduated with honors. Lives in brooklyn With connor who is currently attending college. They still visit CHB from time to time.

So this one time, he steals something but then gets caught. Nothing expensive. A petty offence really. He calls chiron up to save his ass but chirons like NOPE.

So he gets charged. And the court gives him community service since it really was a petty offence.

He has to work with those “plant a tree” volunteer services during the weekend.

Katie is also volunteering there for fun and mostly because during the weekend, she has time to spare.

Travis goes there and is genuinely surprised to see her since he hasnt seen her in 4 years. ( she doesnt visit CHB as often. And even when she does she doesnt see the stolls)

Katie is genuinely surprised too.

First day, they dont talk the whole morning- just planting trees. Katie is still curious as to why he is here. So by the afternoon she asks him.

Shes isnt one bit surprised about the stealing thing. She also forgave them about the Easter Bunny cabin incident as it was 8 years ago??¿¿

Hes kinda nervous and blushing when he tells her the truth. Tbh he had a tiny crush on her back when they were teens. But it sorta went away, as they didnt interact much.

They catch up and its mostly just small talk. The next day, they talk more and katie realises travis has changed. He isn’t as annoying anymore. Travis also realises that katie has changed as she doesnt lecture and scold people anymore. Shes become more chill

The volunteering thing is over so they exchange numbers, promising to keep in touch. However over text, their convo is dry seeing as they arent THAT close and with their busy adult lifes. They slowly drift apart.

Fast forward another year. Katie works at her environmental firm and they start a new project. The firms brings in business consultants because the project has to be a success. One of the consultants is obvio TRAVISSSSSS.

Again both of them are surprised to see each other. Like always they dont really talk in the beginning. Mostly small talk. But then they get paired together for a part of the project.

So then it begins, late nights, coffee runs, laughter at 11pm in the office. Trying to work on numbers and investors and getting the most out reach on this project.

They get to know each other on a much higher level. They start to like each other but wont say anything.

Travis admits katie is gorgeous. And katie admits travis is handsome (not to each other. They just think about it)

2 months later, katie invites travis over to work on the project, trying to come up with an action plan. He brings over beer. And they settle in. Its 2 am. And they both are tipsy.

The project is long forgotten, and start talking about weird things like is cereal soup? Is gucci even worth it?

Its 2 am. Katies apartment is dim because of the lighting. They are both drunk. Sitting on the floor, extremely close to each other. Travis find hers absolutely gorgeous. Her cheeks are flushed coz of the alcohol. And shes wheezing so hard coz of what he said.

Katie thinks he looks hot as hell. And with his knowledge on business she finds him 1000 times more attractive.

Travis kisses her first, he pulls back about to apologise, before katie grabs him by the shirt and kisses him back. They have drunk sex on the carpet.

When travis wakes up the next morning, he realises he fucked up. Sleeping with a coworker. What was he thinking? You dont mix business and pleasure.

So he leaves her apartment. And when katie wakes up to see him not there she is kinda hurt.

They see each other in the office next day. And travis cant make eye contact with her. Katie is super confused because she thought he had a good time.

When everyone goes to lunch. She grabs travis and pushed him into a broom closet. And practically interrogates him.

Travis admits he likes her and she says the same. They’re super close to each other(coz of the tiny closet). The electricity in the air is charged. And they kiss again.

Travis doesnt wanna have sex in a closet so he picks her up, slams her on a table in the closet, bunches her tight skirt around her hips, and goes down her.

And katies just trying not to moan loudly. But failing miserably. Travis stoll knows how to eat pussy.

The rest of the day is filled with luscious glances, slight touches, her putting her hand on his thigh under the table and slowly inching upwards.

They meet up that evening at her apartment. And they agree to start dating. They keep it lowkey not yet telling connor.

After 1 month, they tell connor who btw called it from day one. He’s extremely happy for them.

Travis gets a bit jealous when guys flirt with katie and vice versa. But the two them only have eyes for each other.

Katie gets paired with another guy from the office for some work. Travis also notices that the guy checks katie out a lot, even though she is oblivious.

because of their conflicting work schedules, and how they never get to see each other. Katie working on the project with “that guy”travis is busy with his work, and helping connor out in his senior year. Late nights where they miss each other so much

And thats when their first real fight happens. Hes yelling. Shes yelling. Travis gets insecure that katie doesnt want him anymore. Katies positive they are gonna break up.

In a last ditch effort, she goes to his place. And have a painfully truthful conversation on how they both messed up. They promise to do better and communicate more

That night they make ~~love~~ to each other. Not sex, LOVEEEEE.

After that its smooth sailing. They have fights now and then, but nothing they cant handle.

Their first “I love you’s” is a week after they made love to each other. She was making dinner ( shes a fucking amazing cook) and travis is standing behind her arms around her waist, chin on her shoulders.

And they’re talking and he says “well thats one of things i love about u” and after a second he realises what he said and practically freezes. Katie stops stirring the pasta and turns to look at him.

They both just kinda stare at each other and travis is so fucking nervous and then katie breaks out into the most breathtaking smile he has ever seen. she tells him i love u back.

Their kissing turns to making out and he picks her up, slams her on the kitchen counter and they have sex. (They also turned off the stove dw)

2 orgasms later. They finally eat dinner. And things between them are fucking amazing

After dinner they retreat back to the bedroom where katie is screaming his name and travis’ grunting heavily.

And it’s complete bliss.....

Also side note. Hermes and demeter 100% approve

[bellasharifuddin]

The Day I Became a Mother

It’s been a while since I last post anything here, typing feels awkward as well. But this has always been a thing that I wanted to do since the day I’ve given birth, to document and blog about my pregnancy and my birth journey, so in 4-5 years to come when my memories fade, I can always come back to reminisce every detail that I keep here, like a memory capsule. 

The Day I Found Out I Was Pregnant. 

You know, when people say that when you have a strong intuition about something, trust your gut feeling, because it’s often true. Mirin and I have always talked about having kids, me wanting a baby so much within months after we got married, however, Mirin having second thoughts about it. We were both married for less than a year, sleeping on a toto without a mattress or a bed, living in the deep slum of Wangsa Maju area where the rats are larger than the cats. Hahaha. Naturally, given our circumstances, he’d want to take things slow. 

Fast forward to a couple of months, we went out for some steaks and karaoke on a weekend night. I told mirin to stop by Watsons, for me to buy a pregnancy test kit. Mirin didn’t question much, because occasionally I would randomly buy one, just for fun. But this time, I didnt just get one. I ended up buying three. Why? Because somehow, I had a strong feeling this time. I just felt... weird. It was a feeling that I can’t put it into words. 

We came home at midnight, I went to the bathroom too “pee on the stick”. Then I saw the first line... a few seconds later comes the second one. Oh my god. Okay. I knew Mirin was standing outside the toilet door, waiting. Eventually, I had to break the news to him. When I showed to Mirin, we both ended up hugging and crying. Was I happy? Was I in shock? Was I sad? Yes, a little bit of everything. Its funny that all you’ve wanted was a baby, then when it actually happens, suddenly you’re freaked out. Happy that its a blessing. Sad that it hits you without a warning. 

                                                      Pregnant!

When the morning sickness finally kicked in, I knew we couldn’t live in the current house. Its not the best place to raise a child. And the next-door neighbor was having major renovation that was super loud and noisy. After sleepless nights and searching for a new place, we eventually moved out. Bought our first bed, bought our first dining table, bought our first gas stove. A many of firsts. Soon we finally bought a baby cot from Ikea. We bought it too early. Although it was too early to put it up, but Mirin assembled it anyways. I could tell that he was excited. It was such a fun and exciting moment, for the both of us.

But those were the fun part. Like most pregnancies, the not so fun part about being pregnant was me being diagnosed with Pregnancy Hypertension during my 36th week of pregnancy. My blood pressure spiked up to 140/100 on two consecutive readings, and the next thing I know, that I’m sitting in an ambulance, on my way to Hospital Kuala Lumpur’s emergency building. 

                     At Hospital Kuala Lumpur. Waiting for an available bed

                  Mirin bought me the entire family mart food available xD

I spent 3 nights in their maternity wards, finally discharged after the doctor told me that I was clear to go. While I was in the hospital, it pains me to see new mothers struggling during the COVID19 pandemic. Throughout your stay, no visitations were allowed from anyone including your husband. If your baby cries or if you’re in pain, you’d have figure it out yourself. I remember praying to god while crying that I do not want to be induced there. The ward was stuffy and hot. There were too many people crammed in a room. It was hell. 

The Day That I Give Birth

One week after my discharge, we both went for my monthly checkup with my OBGYN at Pantai. Again, my doctor advised me to be induced tomorrow, since my blood pressure spiked again, and I was almost full term (38 weeks) so it was okay to go. She told me that “It’s best to get the baby out or else you boleh kena sawan” OMG Okay okay. So we packed our bags, ate sushi for dinner, slept soundly for the very last time, and headed to the hospital again at 9 am the next morning. 

                         Induction day. We definitely overpacked haha

       Arrived at the hospital lobby, did a mandatory swab test before entering

Appointment card. Booked and paid for the accommodations prior to checking in

I was told to change into my labor robe (I’m not too sure what it’s called), and waited. When my doctor finally arrived, she then began to insert some sort of a plastic strip deeeeeep into my cervix. Ouch, that hurts. Okay, so that’s how induction works eh? Then I was given antibiotics into my IV drip too, since I was GBS (Group-B Strep) Positive as well. 

                                Toilet selfie! Calm before the storm

After an hour, I felt the contraction. Initially it was uncomfortable, then it hurts like hell. The contractions felt like period pain but like a million times worse. Occasionally, Doctor Haslinda would come and check on my “bukaan”. Hours passed. 1cm... 2cm... 3cm.... when I finally said:

“Omg sakit sangat dah tak tahan, I want an epidural!“

Ok no, that was a lie. I initially didn’t want to take an epidural. I wanted to try and bear with the pain, but Mirin convinced me to take it, so after tossing and turning like a dying fish I finally said okay. 

The anesthesiologist came after what felt like an eternity, and asked me to sign a consent form. I’m not really sure what was written in that. Siapa je ada masa nak baca terms and conditions panjang panjang bila tengah contractions??? 

He told me to sit on the edge of the bed, while hugging a pillow. I remembered him injecting some numbing spray, then I felt the BIG NEEDLE poking through my spine. Then.. that was it. It was so fast. The entire process took only 5 mins. Was it painful as I thought it would be? No. Was it still scary tho? Yep hahaha.

Soon after, Dr Haslinda pecahkan air ketuban when I was 4cm dilated. It didnt hurt because I was on epidural, but I felt so much warm liquid flowing out non-stop. So bizarre. 

Once you’re on epidural, you’re basically bed-ridden. No bathroom trips anymore, my legs feel like jelly. Sometimes the nurse will come to empty my bladder with a catheter. When the epidural kicked in, I could finally sleep. I slept like a baby. I slept for hours. Painless. No more feeling like a dying fish. And so I thought.............

3am. I woke up with INTENSE CONTRACTION PAIN. Why is it so painful? I thought I’m on epidural? I called the nurse straight away. Turned out the epidural drug ran out. It was sooo stressful because the nurse that was on duty that night didn’t know how to topap balik the epidural drug into the machine. She called her colleague, then the colleague also tak tahu. Then both of them spent like forever to troubleshoot how to use the machine, sampai lastly kena call doctor tanya. YA ALLAH, rasa macam nak maki je. 

7am the next day. Bukaan baru 7-8cm. Doctor decided to use another form of induction to speed up the process. It’s called pitocin, and injected through my IV drip. Within MINUTES, I could feel very intense and painful contractions, that the epidural can’t even help. So throughout the remaining 7cm to 10cm, I felt every inch of real labor pain. I clenched Mirin’s hand. So tightly that I think it got bruised. A minute felt like an hour, and an hour felt like years. It was soo bad that my memory was so fuzzy. 

Finally, it was 10cm. Time to go. They put both of my legs up, macam gambar bawah ni haha: 

                                      Picture courtesy from Google

There were two nurses, one small cute Malay nurse, one pregnant Indian nurse, and my OBGYN, Dr Haslinda. I love them all, they were so supportive and nice to me throughout my labor process. My doctor taught me how to push correctly:

“Take a deeeeeeep breath then tahan, clench your fists, chin down and teran macam nak berak sekuat-kuat hati“

I was so determined to get the baby out. I just wanted the contraction pain to end. I did everything they told me to do. I hold on to Mirin’s hand, and PUSHHHHHHHEDDDDDD! I could hear Mirin saying “You’re doing great sayang!” After several pushes, and some sips of water breaks, the baby’s head is almost out. The head was the hardest to push. Besar! I literally felt like my down there was stretching to its limit. Once the head is out, I did another small push, and the rest of the baby’s body macam keluar instantly macam super slimy like that haha. 

Finally the baby is out! 8.26AM! The contractions stopped immediately. I instantly feel like I wasn’t pregnant anymore. The doctor then injected something on my thigh, then my uri just popped right out haha. My body felt so tired, but so so light. Lega, yay no longer pregnant haha. I ended up having second degree perineal tear without an episiotomy, and was stitched. I felt the benang, ngilu. I felt the needle pierced through my muscles too. But it didnt hurt so it wasn’t too bad. 

The baby gets cleaned up. Then soon all of the nurses left the labor room, it was just me, Mirin and our baby. Mirin picked her up, and azankan. Mirin started crying, I cried too. It was magical :’)

We did skin to skin and tried breastfeeding for the first time. As I look at her, hair was so thick. Her cute little fingers. Her beautiful face. She’s perfect. 

                            I slept for 5 hours straight after the labor

Thinking back, I have no idea how I managed to muster such courage to go through all these. Mirin even told me that during the active labor stage, when I was pushing, at one point I pushed so hard that my entire face turned blue. Talk about adrenaline.

Do I want to have another baby? Well, lets keep a rain check on that question for another few more years to come xD

[chilly-me-softly]

Part two of Jack? Him saying he didnt have to comeback for you, just to be with his son and you were upset by it bc it means that hes not going to love you anymore so you decide to work overseas, making an arrangement to jack every two weekends he gets to see his son. Then one day you got into an accident without the baby and jack realises how scared he was if he were to lose you but you weren't willing to act like nothing happened between you two bc you were so hurt by his words and actions.⁰

Part 1

The situation between you and Jack was more or less the same, still quite embarrassing and of few words. In those months you had let Jack arrange to come and see Dylan as best he could, making sure you were alone so he could have the baby all to himself.

It wasn't easy to have him in your sight almost every day, every time you looked at him you wanted to talk to him, but something was blocking you. You would stand aside and let him enjoy those father/son moments until the child required your presence and then you would take a deep breath and put aside everything you were feeling, acting like a good mother and nothing more.

He kept his words, he was there for his son and if not for matters concerning him, he wouldn't talk to you so much. You understood him, but it still hurt honestly. And Dylan had started eating solid food which meant that it wasn't up to you all hours of the day, so Jack started taking him to his apartment. He had set up a room for him with the help of some of his already fathered teammates and started spending time alone with his son in the most appropriate way - without you.

The fact that Jack was present and willing to keep Dylan when he wasn't training cut the babysitting cost in half. Raising a child costs a lot of money, and your maternity leave was over too quickly for your taste. You worked hard to give your child a decent life, happy that you had a job even before you and Jack met, and when you were offered a promotion you were left stoned.

You wouldn't have thought twice about accepting it before, but now there were many things to consider. You were given a week to think about it, and you were counting on taking every minute to make a decision.

One of the positive aspects was the salary increase that would help you and not a little in giving your child a decent life. One of the downsides was that they would have promoted you, but your new office would have been in another country which meant moving with a toddler to a town where you don't know anyone and, more importantly, getting Dylan away from Jack. Again.

You didn't know how he would react, but you were really considering moving and everything. And you have very little time to decide and talk to him about it so you decide not to waste time, to find the words for once and face him.

When he brings Dylan back to you that day - Jack had taken him to his parents' house - you make him sit down, the sleeves of your shirt pulled down on your hands more and more as a clear sign of discomfort. "Can we talk?"

"What's going on?" he sits on the couch, his complete focus on you as you don't know where to start.

"I... I've been offered a promotion at work"

"Well, that's great, isn't it?"

"Yeah" you sigh, "but to accept it, I'd have to move"

"Where?" he asks serious by staring at a point in front of you.

"In Germany"

He scoffs, "Are you going to accept it?"

"I don't know, I'm thinking about it. It would be a great opportunity of course and I don't have... anyone to hold me here anyway"

"Sure!" he rolls his eyes smiling sarcastically, "You've already kept me away from my son for months anyway, why not keep doing it. I'm nobody"

"Jack, I'm not trying to keep you away from him. That's exactly why I wanted to talk to you"

"What exactly do you want me to do? Tell you not to go? I can't (Y/N), I'm nobody in your life and I wouldn't have the right to do that anyway... if it makes you happy"

A shot to the heart while he keep repeating those things and remembering what you did, as if you don't regret it enough already.

Finally you agree, a deal with the company to let you fly home every two weeks so Jack can spend time with his son. Difficult days when Jack doesn't even look you in the face when he comes to pick up the baby, you leave him for a few days so you can fix everything for the move and those days you fly off and find yourself in Germany, with your mother by your side to help you once again with your mess.

You can't see him face to face every day but you still make sure Jack gets pictures and videos every day and video calls every night to say good night to Dylan, the video losing connection every time without even saying goodbye when is up to you and your heart tightens every time.

You like your job, your baby is growing every day and your mother is starting to push you to go out with someone even though she knows Jack hasn't gotten out of your head yet. You find yourself counting the days between visits, even if once again you just leave Dylan and go away until it's time to pick him up. But just those minutes are enough in a way, not having the chance to talk to him properly and then not feeling the hatred he feels for you, is enough.

Actually Jack doesn't hate you, but he can't help but make sarcastic jokes or ignore you like you did with him during pregnancy. He can't help but think that you could have kept the existence of his child from him for who knows how long. He knows that sooner or later he'll have to put that crap aside to behave like an adult and raise that child in a peaceful environment, despite the situation, but he can't at the moment, he feels it's too soon yet. 

But then he gets a phone call and everything changes. Your mother calls him desperate and worried, you've been involved in an accident and he's at the hospital, in the background he can hear his baby crying and for a moment he's relieved that he wasn't involved but it doesn't take him long to get on the first plane to come to you.

He's worried, the whole trip he's thinking about you. It's true that he can't stand you right now, but you are still the mother of his baby and he doesn't want anything to happen to you. Yet his heart beating as he approaches the hospital, tells him that he's not only worried about the mother of his child; he's worried about you and that's it, no labels. Anger is still a feeling, it means he's not indifferent to you, he couldn't bear to lose you.

He doesn't waste time taking his son in his arms and giving him some of his warmth when he gets there that night, even if he has fallen asleep in the meantime. Your mother explains to him in general what happened, still shaken by a few sobs, and Jack cannot help but look in the direction of the rooms, eager to make sure with his own eyes that you are okay now.

He tells her to go home, it's not a place for children after all, and that he would warn her of anything. So the woman leaves after he gives his baby one last kiss before going into your room.

A bruise extending from the shoulder to mid-arm immediately catches his attention, you have your eyes closed and your head turned to the other side of him. They keep you there for observation overnight but you should be good enough to be discharged in the morning, although the pain in Jack's eyes when he sees you there is quite evident. He'd rather be him in your place than see you like this.

He sits in the chair next to your bed and shakes your hand, kissing your palm. You open your eyes slowly, turning your head and sighing, and when you see Jack, you frown.

"Jack? What are you doing here?" there's scratches on your face here and there, and he's suppressing the desire to caress your cheek and smiles.

"Your mother called me. She was worried"

"Dylan's fine, he wasn't with me"

"I know, I know" he kisses your knuckles again, "I sent them home, your mother was visibly shaken and there was no point in letting them stay here"

"At least you succeeded, thank you" you sigh with one hand in your hair still a little numb.

"I suppose she did it because someone would have stayed with you" your eyes fall on your intertwined hands.

"When your mother called me..."

"Jack" you interrupt him right away, but he shakes his head.

"No please let me finish" he looks at you pleading and you nod your head slightly, "when she called me, the world collapsed on me (Y/N). I didn't think I'd ever feel anything for you ever again I'm honest, and yet the idea of never seeing you again scared me"

"Jack"

"And not because you're just the mother of my child, but because you are you. I really thought I didn't feel anything for you anymore, but now I realize I can't be without you. If something had happened to you, I-"

"Jack, we've been apart for a year and a half now. I think you've had a chance to think of everything, don't you?"

"We've always been in touch with each other though, for-for Dylan and for his sake. Imagining that I could lose you opened my eyes (Y/N)"

"Wouldn't it be nice to give Dylan a proper family, play together and be happy?"

Images of a life together as three appear in your mind as you smile lightly imagining how your baby boy is running towards both of you, Jack's sulk when the baby calls you and not him, playing in the park together or staying in bed on a rainy day.

"It would be a dream Jack, but we can't" Jack's smile dies down.

"Why not?"

"Jack, you left me because you didn't love me anymore and you kept telling me every available moment until almost yesterday"

"I was hurt, okay, what was I supposed to do? You kept the fact that you were pregnant from me"

"See? We could never get over it" you shake your head at that, your head bursts from what happened and what's happening now.

"It's also true that you never risked dying before, I thought I had more time to make things right between us" he admits squeezing the other hand in yours as well.

"I've never risked dying before"

"Involved in an accident? Doesn't change things" he shrugs looking at you.

"Look, I know this may sound weird, and I still have a lot of confusion in my head, too. But I can assure you I've never been this worried before, not even when you fell off your bike in front of me"

"Oh right laugh at other people's misfortunes" you hit him lightly with your free hand, moaning for the sudden movement and he's right next to you.

"Easy" he looks you in the eye, passing a hand through your hair and then bending down leaving a kiss on your cheek, a slight pinch in that place where his lips collided with your skin and your heart beating wildly.

You have such confusion in your head, you don't want to make a fool of yourself but at the same time you want to be happy again. You want to be able to finally forgive yourself and knowing that Jack might be willing to forgive you might be a step forward.

 Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6

[keis-simping-disaster]

The Babysitter pt. 2

Hey, it's me. I'm sorry for the long ass delay

Warnings: I guess underage, starker, smut, mature language, whatever you might find offending? I guess I dont know nor care.

Let's get into it now

Link to part 1

_________________________________________

The two turned and smirked at eachother once the door closed, they had no prior knowledge of eachother but they knew in due time that they would have eachother somewhere in the apartment, having a real pleasurable time. However, neither Peter nor Tony knew when, they had the whole weekend to themselves since May went on her trip.

Tony looking around the apartment checking what there was to do and make for food throughout his stay, before turning to Peter. "So Pete, what would you like to do?" The first thing that came to Peter's mind was you but his mouth just spewed out the words, "maybe something to eat?" Tony nodded looking kind of disappointed but he would never let Peter know that. He then picked up his keys and motioned to the door, "let's get going then, because I cant cook to save my own life without it tasting like trash or being burnt that it's just ash." Saying this caused Peter to snort, which caused Tony to look at Peter who was blushing and covering his mouth, "alright, whatever that was Pete, that was adorable." Saying that cause him to blush even more that it went below his shirt collar.

______________

During their entire lunch at a diner, Peter and Tony talked about interests and dislikes. Tony mainly flirting wanting to tease and make him squirm in desire. When the two got home, Peter was rock hard in his jeans, luckily he wasnt to noticeable cause he wasnt too endowed in size in that department, nor did he really care, he was into dominant guys and rather bottom, which he had the best bubble butt for, but he never had a partner yet he knew what he wanted. When the two entered the apartment, Peter sensed the vibe around Tony had changed from the first time, it was more dark and hungry. When he turned to look at Tony, he only caught a glimpse of a big bulge in the ripped skinny jeans of the other boy before Tony's lips were pressed against his. The kiss was anything but sweet, it was rough with primal lust and the scratch of his goatee. Tony's hands started at his hips when Peter didnt pull away they moved to his ass that hes been eyeing since he met him. Peter, although shocked at first started immediately kissing him back just as rough, loving the feeling of Tony's facial hair rubbing his skin red. When he felt the older boy's large hands on his ass he moaned and pushed back against them, filling Tony's hands with more of that soft round flesh.

Tony felt how turned on Peter was by the way he was trying to hump his leg and press his ass into his hands at the same time. Pulling away from the kiss, tony murmured against his lips, "you want me baby boy? Cause I want you, gonna ruin you for anyone else with my big cock~" That practically had Peter moaning in want and almost rolling his eyes back, it was all so new, but he wanted it so bad. Just managing to speak, he looks at Tony, eyes blown with lust, "God yes"

With that, Tony picked up the 16 year old Peter, and carried him to his room, with directions. Once in the room he practically threw Peter onto the bed before climbing onto it over him. He pulled the push pink lips into another deep kiss and ran his hands under Peter's shirt, dragging his calloused pads of his fingers across the sensitive nipples. Causing Peter to gasp and arch his back, "fuck Tony, that feels good. Love your big rough fingers on my nipples." Smirking tony pulled away and pulled off Peter's shirt in one felt swoop, leaving Peter confused for a second before Tony starting kissing, licking and nipping and the boys sensitive buds. Once done with his administrations to both of them, he pulls away sitting up on his haunches. Below him he sees a panting Peter, hair messy from his own hands with hickeys on his chest, collarbones, and neck, his lips swollen and bitten and a deep blush down to his chest. Everything seemed perfect to Tony which turned him on more. He got off the bed to pull off his own clothes after removing Peter's pants and boxers, seeing luscious pale skin, practically hairless, a hard little cocklet leaking and pink, and perfectly kissable thighs he'd like to mark up a little later. Tony decided to tease peter by stripping unbearably slow, causing him to whine in need. "You need to use your words baby. Daddy cant possibly know what you want." Peter blushed impossibly more, and spoke gently but in need, "I want you to hurry up and fuck me daddy." Hearing peter refer to him as daddy made Tony even more hard if possible, and threw his clothes off as fast as possible letting his cock spring out before slapping him in the stomach. Seeing the length and girth of Tony's cock had Peter's hole clenching in want but his jaw went slack and eyes widening, "h-how big?" Smirking Tony replied, "oh just a nice 10 inches. I'll be gentle on you baby~" peter was left practically drooling and moaned just at the knowledge. Tony taking this as a go ahead got on the bed again and carefully turned peter onto his stomach and hiked up his butt so it was in the air. He saw his perfect bubble butt on full display, and pink virginal hole. Unable to resist Tony leaned in and gently bit onto the round mound of flesh and began sucking hickeys. After being satisfied with his art Tony decided to stop teasing a little bit and licked to Peter's hole, causing him to gasp at the new weird feeling of Tony's tongue against his rim. Moaning when he pushed his tongue in and exploring as far as he could.

After Tony deemed his hole was wet and stretched enough for his finger he pulled away and spit on his fingers, 3 to be exact, before pushing the first in. New to the intrusion, Peter gasped and moaned, he felt it be still for a moment before starting to move in and out and curling against his walls. Pretty soon after that a second finger entered Peter's little hole and he winced slightly at the small stretch but began moaning when the fingers thrust into him deeper and suddenly he let out a scream and came when Tony hit his prostate. Tony slowed his movements with his hand to keep him stimulated but not too much it would hurt, "such a good boy. Cumming on daddy's fingers" he smirked as Peter rode out his high. Once back in touch of reality Peter pushed back against Tony's fingers that were still inside him "keep going, p-please."

Tony still very horny kept going addthing the third finger slowly, he knew it felt good but wanted to make sure he didnt overstimulate peter. After a little while he felt that peter was stretched enough he lubed up his cock and lined up with Peter's hole that was clenching around nothing and slowly slide in, holding back on ramming in and fucking him like a bitch in heat. Peter let out a long moan when Tony's cock slide in with ease, immediately he knew he was addicted and practically drooled when he bottomed out.

Tony looked down at peter and saw a small bulge in his stomach showing just how deep he was in his boy now. Seeing it made him growl in possessiveness, "look at that pete, I'm so deep in your small body I can see it. I'll ruin you for anyone else~." Peter looked and blushed deeply seeing the bulge as well, "n-no dont want no one else." With that came a smirk from Tony who began to thrust slow but deep into Peter. Immediately peter clung onto the older boys shoulders and wrapped his legs around his waist, loving the feeling of being full and stimulated. Speeding up Tony let out a groan of pleasure feeling how tight Peter was still around him even after fingering him wide open, he knew he wouldnt last long especially when peter was making those high pitched cute moans which gave away how close he was already too. Without warning peter suddenly came having been sensitive from his first orgasm a little bit ago, causing him to clench around tony tightly. Tony moaned loudly at the feeling and started to lose himself in chasing his own pleasure, he started speeding up even more and thrusting even harder into Peter's prostate hes been gently grazing the whole time. Screaming in pleasure Peter's eyes rolled back as well as his head as he arches his back off the bed. Taking his chance as hes fucking into peter as hard as he can he bites his neck to leave a dark mark of teeth but not breaking the skin and cums deep in the boy who came for the 3rd time with him. Slowly riding out their orgasms none of them said a word and just mutually kissed and caught their breaths. Coming to a stop tony didnt pull out just yet as he panted against Peter's bruised up neck, Peter brought a hand up Tony's neck and into his hair to pet him with praise, his voice too broken to speak. Tony slide out of peter after a couple minutes and laid next to him, sweat covering both their naked forms and glistening in the dim light. Peter was the first to speak after a long comfortable silence to catch their breaths, "that was really good." Tony agreed with a hum already starting to doze off from using all his energy, Peter then spoke again cuddling Tony by laying his sweat matted head on his chest, "I think I'm in love with you already." Tony took a moment to answer as he wrapped an arm around peter to bring him closer even if he was hot, "I love you too, you're gonna be mine forever." Smiling peter closed his eyes and they both fell asleep, happy and together as boyfriends.

[diamondsnpolaroids]

I know I havent posted in awhile, and I will catch you all up on my weekly polaroid progression shots but I've really been struggling this week and I need to get it out somewhere.

Yes. I am still pregnant. In 3 days I'll finally be 40 weeks. A milestone I never thought I'd get to because this entire pregnancy has been a rollercoaster of emotions, pain and endless struggles. I didnt want to be pregnant this long. At all. This is going to be long and there will be a lot of personal details, but I need to get it out. I'm tired of having all these thoughts with no outlet.

Since I was 16 years old I was convinced I would never be able to have a child. It was always a devastating thought until I got to the age of 22 when i finally kind of accepted the fact and was okay not becoming a mother. The one thing i wanted between those years, the one thing that broke my heart was I'd never be able to experience the feeling of being pregnant. That may seem silly because that's such a short period of time when it comes to being a mother. 9 months of growing a human compared to the years and years of seeing that person grow is so minuscule. But for some reason that was always what broke me most.

I was dating the same man that entire time. I was 16 when we first starting dating, and I'll be convinced till the day I die that he was my soulmate. He was my best friend over absolutely anything. I could be my totally authentic self with him. He knew how weird I was and stayed. He watched me drown myself in my depression and stayed. He saw me act like a child, like an adult, my worst and best moments. Experienced my grief and my biggest accomplishments and was always right there for me. Growing up with an alcoholic drug addict father I knew I needed a man that would never abandon his family for those things. He was the man I knew I never needed to worry about.

I never really noticed the abusive behavior. The mental torture, isolation, the control he held over me, how hard his harsh words would hit.. it never really crossed my mind because when the good times were good, they were great. When they were bad, I was convinced it was all on me. My depression was the controlling one. My insane mind was the problem. Never him. Then the alcohol started to take over. He consumed himself in it whenever he had the chance. His childhood was ruined by this substance just like mine was and he was slowly turning to it instead of working out his trauma that it caused. Hed increase the intake slowly but surely and when it got too much for me to handle I'd cry and beg that he stopped. Seeing how upset it made me the first few times hed stop or slow down. But it was never for long. Hed go a week and then once again it would slowly increase and the cycle would continue. After awhile, I was "crazy" and he was "just doing what everyone our age was doing". No one our age was drinking 6+ a night on week days and spending $200 at least per night on the weekends. By the time we hit 7 years it got to an all time low. April of 2019 I realized all of this wasnt okay any more. An old friend had walked into my life and for the first time in years I was treated like a human being with feelings. Real feelings that were valid. I was told and shown that I was no where near the same happy girl I once was. It was all over my face and in my body language that I was a totally different person and not in a good way. It was clear just by looking in my eyes that I was severely depressed. I was reassured that my decision to split to work on ourselves was indeed the best step forward I could have ever taken.

My boyfriend reluctantly agreed to end the relationship for the sake of bettering ourselves or else we'd never last as a long term couple. He stopped drinking. Wed still hangout but was met with an extreme depression on his end, begging for me to stay and help him through it as if I hadn't tried for years and years. I knew nothing I could do would make him change, it needed to be a decision he made for himself. He had ruined every part of my being and I needed to explore who I was as an individual. My old friend made me feel ways I hadn't in years and eventually I caved to my emotions and desperate need to feel wanted without the attachment and abusive behavior always on my shoulders. I wasnt with my ex, and I kept it from him. After a month I started to notice his changes but it wasnt enough. He still tried to keep me wrapped around his finger while questioning my every move. He was working on it though, and I was noticing the change, but I couldnt stop what I was doing.

After another month he found out. He was upset, naturally, but was still around. He still wanted to work on it. Then 3 days later I took my first pregnancy test. It was positive. I kept it to myself praying it was a fluke. I took 2 more the next day. It wasnt. I took one last one, called my doctor, then called him over. I told him, and it wasnt an ideal reaction. He was forcing an abortion on me. For someone who never thought they could get pregnant, to find out after years that it was indeed possible, I just couldnt. This was a miracle in my eyes. Once I told him I couldnt, giving him the option to sign off all his rights and to stay away if that's what he wanted, he accepted he was going to be a father. But he also disappeared. Just up and left, and I was met with the worst mental abuse he could ever dish out for weeks. I had never felt so low in my entire life. Being told our child is a mistake, how terrible of a person I was and how him not being around is totally and completely my fault. What i failed to mention is for the last 3 years of our relationship he would use snapchat to talk to girls behind my back. I'd check his phone after every fight and hed go out drinking, just to see up to 7 different girls names with a "sent" notification beside them. I'd delete them off his contacts, confront him, ect ect, but he never stopped. I was always ashamed I stayed with someone who could do this but my love for him was so blind and so strong.. I couldnt let go.

Whenever I would mention all the hurt he caused me, it never compared to me sleeping with someone else while we weren't even together. It was ALL. MY. FAULT. And he couldnt take even an ounce of responsibility for how he treated me and pushed me out of his arms. After 2 weeks of us knowing I'm pregnant, he started seeing someone else. He was drinking beyond what he ever was with me, and now he was with someone else. Some girl who was also fresh out of a long term relationship, totally okay with the fact he was to but also expecting a baby with. I shouldnt have been mad or upset, we weren't together, but it hurt. I wanted the man I thought I'd never have to worry about being a good dad to actually be here with me on this journey. But he wasnt. For the months to come he gave me promises that their relationship wasnt an offical thing and reassured me he doesnt think she'll be around long. I shouldnt give up hope on us. My hormonal, emotional self prayed that was true.. until they became official in September.

Once that happened, it was like a ghost town. I only saw him for the 3 ultrasounds we had to pay for. He never came to any doctors appointments, he didnt feel the baby move, nothing. The entire time blaming me for him not being around. I sat at home every day after long shifts at work knowing I'm all alone in this world, growing a baby, doing everything by myself while he lived his life with no responsibility, laying next to her every night. Every day my heart broke. Some days were better than others, but not a single day I didnt wish and pray that hed atleast be there for his child. I knew my feelings weren't relevant anymore, I just wanted my son to have a father. He needed to have a father. I wasnt going to let my kid go through life always wondering why he wasnt enough for him like I did. I still hurt for myself, but no where near as much as I hurt for my son. I was given empty promises from my ex, he said hed call every day so atleast if he didnt watch our baby grow inside of me, hed atleast know his voice when he finally arrives. But hed go days without calling, and it would somehow turn into my fault because I hurt him too much to call his son.

I've spent this entire pregnancy working on myself, on my mental health, researching how to be a mother, what I need to do and stay away from, how to cope with every type of situation that may arise. I've done nothing but work on growing myself to be the best person I could be for my son. He just stayed drinking away his problems, distracting himself in every type of way he could. Avoiding all responsibilities of becoming a father soon.

Fast forward to about a week ago, when a phone call got a little spicy heated between us and ended in me sending him some snapchats of myself by his request. I know I shouldnt have, he was with someone else, but I missed him and wanted one last feeling of being wanted by the man I always thought I'd marry. I did exactly what broke me the last 3 years of our relationship and I really didnt feel bad about it. For 2 days this continued until it just stopped and he got cold with me. Once again, I'm left broken hearted but this time, I know it's my own fault.

During the time before this, for months I highly considered giving my son my last name. It made sense. He wasnt reliable enough to even spend 30 seconds every day to call his son, how could I ever believe hed be there every day for him once he was born? It was logical. Everyone who knew our situation told me I should even before I brought up that being an option I was weighing in my mind.

A few days after our snapchatting stopped, I had to finally tell him. I couldnt bring myself to blindside him with something so serious. I should have, really, but I still hold his feelings deep in my heart, and I couldnt hurt the man I spent over 7 years with like this. So I told him. He broke. But not in any way I ever thought he would. He confessed how he still loved me, how everyone around him knows he still loves me, ending with how much this would break his heart, giving us no chance of ever being together again. We'd never be able to do things as a family, hed never look at me or our son again. It was, to say the least, extremely intense. But it also left me wondering if this was one of the many manipulative ways he knows to get what he wants. He always brought "us" up to get his way on things. It felt genuine, but I'm also extremely hormonal and yes I still love and miss him like crazy.

It's been a few days since then and theres been no word of any feelings since. Hes been cold and more distant and my heart is once again broken into a million pieces. Hes called a couple times but he still misses days. I was given the go ahead to try and self induce labour by my midwives so I have been. When he calls and asks what I did with my day, I'd tell him. Last night apparently I shouldnt have. I was met with anger because I should "leave him be, he'll come when hes ready" as if he knows any kind of physical pain I've been through these last few months.

These past 2 weeks alone I have felt nothing but pain. Between feeling my hips separating, my pelvic bones shifting and my son's head descending lower, constant back pain, not being able to walk properly, my kid sitting on nerves leaving my legs feeling paralyzed or sending shocks into my vagina. Not being able to sleep more than 2 hours at a time max, peeing every hour on the hour, his feet kicking my ribs so hard I curl over, getting his feet stuck under them as well. The pains are unimaginable as you can see, now mixed with all the emotional distress I've been under... you could imagine how I'm ready for this child to enter the world. But no.. I'm being selfish. He isnt ready. I'm fine to keep going. Because apparently my ex knows everything my body is enduring just to bring our child into this world. It broke my fucking heart last night when he yelled at me for it. Absolutely shattered it.

Which brings us to this picture. I couldnt sleep once again, and every time I woke up I was met with mind numbing depression and long crying spells. I feel more alone than ever. My 16-22 years of age is crying for me knowing this was all I ever wanted out of life and it has been constantly ruined and brought down by a man I never knew would act the way he has been. This pregnancy was so easy in almost every aspect compared to most women, I've been so so blessed to have such an easy time physically and yet I constantly feel as if he has ruined this experience for me. Sometimes the mental abuse from a man is worse than the physical. And he knew exactly how to ruin this all for his own selfish needs. I've spent all day today feeling ruined, beaten down, and just straight up depressed. I'm not ready to be a mother, infact I am absolutely scared shitless to be one. But I'm willing to go through being scared over all this physical pain I've been through that seems never ending. I'm ready to meet and love my little man. But once again I feel like I cant even be happy about it because of my ex.

I'm tired. I'm so so so tired of being so inlove with a man who has shown me time and time again he wont be the father I always knew he could be. My heart hurts so bad for my son every single day. And I'm just.... tired. Which is why I'm posting this picture along with my story. I know some women have it worse with their pregnancies and the fathers leaving. I know some men can be all of this plus physically abusive towards women. I know I dont have it the worst, but I'm trying. I need to for my son. I doubt this post will get very far, and I know a lot of judgment will come my way for it, but if my pregnancy journey can help even one woman not feel so alone, then I'm happy with sharing it.

[princessmcpurpledork711]

So, I wanna know about Mason and Ryuki more.

Of course! They met in elementary school. Mason was really shy and mostly kept to himself. Ryuki came up to him and sat with him at lunch and they were practically inseparable ever since. They were both dorks. They played together, watched anime together, and drew together. They were over at each others houses constantly. It was the norm for them to be together.

It seemed natural for Fernando to assume that Mason would go to the same private middle school he sent Camille to. Honestly deep down, Mason knew his family was thinking that. But it didnt feel real until the last two months of sixth grade and his dad taking about getting the paperwork done for the transfer. No discussion, just the unspoken understanding, like it was some law he couldn't break. So Mason didnt even fight it, he just retreated. At the end of the school year, Ryuki promised him they would keep in touch. They could still hang out whenever they could. At first, it seemed that would be easy. The whole summer, they hung out at each others houses, sleepovers and text messages.

It hit Mason as soon as he entered his new school without this best friend next to him how lonely and anxious he was. Everyone at this school seemed to single out Mason, feeling his nerves and uneasiness. He was vulnerable and an easy target. He was alone and miserable. He wouldn't talk to his family about it, always responding with 'It was fine' when the how was school question was asked. He still kept texting Ryuki, but never mentioned what actually happened at school. Ryuki was used to being the more talkative of the two, and normally Mason would be grateful for that, but hearing how Ryuki seemed to be doing well, you know besides missing his friend, made Mason feel like he was the only problem he had. His responses got shorter and shorter. He retreated into himself, would only go to school and then lock himself in his room. He wallowed in his growing depression.

Ryuki did his best to get through school. It was really weird to not have his best friend with him, but he needed to adjust. He followed all his school work well, and acquainted himself well enough with classmates. But he never really stopped thinking about his best friend. He texted him every day. He wanted to make sure he was doing okay. He wanted him to remember that he was always going to be his friend. And it was fine for a bit. School got in the way of actual visits but as long as they kept communicating it was fine. But their conservations started to get shorter. And by the end of the school year, he never got another reply. He really wasn't sure what to think of it at first. What he did notice is that he would always read the messages he left. Rarely he would even see the little ... come up but eventually disappear. This just made him keep texting him every day. Just to remind him that he will always be there for him whenever he needs him. He texted him everyday, always hoping that hell reply one day.

The start of Masons eight grade year was torture. He was getting bullied, and he just stood there and took it, not caring about himself anymore. He went home and did homework. When he finished, he would do literally nothing. Ryuki kept texting him about his new friends he met this year, and he just kept thinking how he was better without him and how he was just kinda drifting through life, not sure why he still even bothers. Hes thought about dying but had no energy to act on it, even though he now slept excessively.

Meeting Stephanie was shock. His cousin was just as shy and awkward as he was, and she was an artist and getting into anime. It was probably the most he talked in a day since 7th grade. But when Steph was talking about her friends she offhandedly mentioned Ryuki and he just sat there on his bed in shock. Steph put two and two together and realize not only was Ryuki Masons only friend, but Mason was the person he texted every day with no response. It was weird, but Stephanie knew how much they both missed each other and after a ton of talking and crying with both each other, and his family and cousin Al downstairs, he decided to finally talk to Ryuki again. Steph suggested a hangout at Ryukis house the next day (a Sunday) Ryuki accepted his best friend back with open arms. After the hangout with all the friends getting to know each other, with only Mason left at Ryukis house, he finally told him about what happened. Tears were shed and hugs were given, and they promised to never lose contact again. With everyone agreeing, they all hung out together every weekend until Mason could finally go to the same school. The rest of eight grade went by well, with Mason finally shrugging off the bullying and focusing only on schoolwork and his new friends.

High school made it feel like the gang was officially complete. They were the weirdos that sat in halls drawing during breaks and lunch drawing. They were cool with that. They all became happier and comfortable with each other and that's all that mattered. Now with that said, it was obvious to everyone since that first meeting that Mason and Ryuki were crushing hard on each other. Not that anyone was gonna do anything about it. Ryuki may have been the most outgoing of them, but he was still shy when it came to that department, and Mason was a gay disaster who was bad at feelings so neither was going to confess. (No one else could push them they aren't any better XP)

It was actually in their junior year, which was last year, when they went to a con when they got together. (Luckily quarantine didnt affect this part of the story, barely. Literally it happened like two months before it started) These dorks have gone to cons since freshman year together and this year they decided to cosplay as My Hero characters. What ended up happening was that Mason went as Todoroki and Ryuki went as Midoriya and this group stans Tododeku and they kinda subconsciously ended up couple cosplaying. They didnt mean to, but walking around the con they stuck together, having fun in character and being awkwardly close together. A lot of people came up to them and asked if they were couple cosplaying. They were awkward messes (pretty in character honestly) and eventually this caused them both to ask themselves how they really felt. (As a cosplayer/roleplayer I feel my characters feelings so much that genuinely feel the hurt/anger/happiness/love) I feel like these feelings were pushed to the surface and both realized how deep they really were. On Saturday they hung around a group of BNHA cosplayers and they all decided to throw their own party in someone's hotel room (they were all minors and they wanted to nerd out and party) Usually shy these babies, but surrounded by equally nerdy people made them go for it. It was fun, snacks, music, watching the show. Then one of the cosplayers had an idea. They put on a slow song and encouraged all the OTPs to dance together. A few of the them get up, and others just dance for the hell of it. Mason and Ryuki looked at each other for a bit, but they danced. They really fell into the moment. They were really close to each other by the end of the song. Mason ended up pulling Ryuki to the balcony and awkwardly but eventually confessed. They were awkward, but happy. They embraced and softly kissed eachother. (The whole party saw them and cheered for the OTP. They were peeved, but still keeps in contact with a few of them, especially a Bakusquad they got along with, they actually seen some of their webcomic before!)

Quarantine starts two months after they got together. That sucks. But they face time every day. And they've met up maybe three times, but as safely as they can. They can't wait until they can actually be together again. Because they will never let anything come between them again.

[lady-une]

A Tempting Offer

Happy Halloween!!!!! I dont care what people say, this month is 31 days of Halloween in my life! Since I didnt get enough requests for the full month I am just going to do two a week. I hope you like this one! Thanks to @realmckitten for sending in this request. As always please leave me some feedback, love it if you want, and share. Help me shine some spooky nyongtory out there.

Jiyong was tapping to the music filling the car as he drove out of the city. The sky was starting to change, soft pinks, blues, and purples painted the sky. Tonight was going to be so much fun, he had searched online for a haunted house that had good reviews and wasn’t PG. Jiyong was sick of all the little kids screaming and the adults laughing as they went through the haunted house. No, he wanted something that would actually scare him and his love. Seungri sat in the passenger seat typing away on his phone, always the business man he was forever responding to emails either about his restaurant chain or about his label. Jiyong smiled as he felt his heart swell with pride over the man Seungri had become. The two had been through lots of ups and downs over the years. The hardest parts were of course during their enlistments, Jiyong a few times thought he was going to go mad as he waited for Seungri to come out. That first week out they two spent it locked up in Seungri’s apartment. Everyone was under strict orders to not disturb the couple, even Yang Hyun-suk who wanted them to get started on their comeback had to agree to leave them be or face the wrath of an angry dragon.

“Where are we going tonight Ji?” Seungri asked as he slid his phone back into his pocket.

“A haunted house of course!”

“Not again, the last one was super lame. There was nothing but little kids running around, and I swear babysitting Su-Ra for Youngbae hyung for the night was scarier than that haunted house.”

Jiyong let out a loud chuckle as the memory of the night came rushing back to him. Youngbae and Hyo-rin had asked the couple to watch their daughter so they could go out for dinner. Jiyong was more than happy to watch the cute little girl meanwhile Seungri was a little more apprehensive. It wasn’t like he hadn’t watched a baby before, but this was different. This was family he was watching. Leading up to the night of babysitting Seungri had spent so much time reading up on how to keep a 5 month old entertained and things they should be working on for their developments. Jiyong sat back and watched Seungri go over the baby books and play classical music as he tried to get her to follow along. Jiyong eventually stepped in and took her off to play with her toys. While she was playing in her jumper Jiyong took Seungri aside to let him know he was doing a good job, but he just needs to have fun with her.

“Don’t laugh at me, that was nerve racking. I was so worried I would do something wrong.” Seungri said as he pouted and crossed his arms.

“Ri-ah, you were so damn cute with how you were so worried about the baby. You will make an amazing dad one of these days.”

The comment from Jiyong had Seungri uncrossing his hands and grabbing onto Jiyong’s. Seungri wanted nothing more than to start a family with Jiyong and had high hopes that soon he would be able to. He wasn’t dumb, he knew it was going to be an uphill battle but he had the love and support from their families and friends. He would go to war for Jiyong.

Pulling up to the warn down looking warehouse Jiyong parked the car before reaching into the backseat. Handing Seungri a dark denim jacket and a facemask that was black and had a glow in the dark ghost on it. As Seungri was putting on his face mask Jiyong also put on his dark denim jacket and his black facemask that had a glow in the dark vampire teeth. The two men exited the car and began walking towards the building. There were other cars in the parking lot with people lining up against the wall of the building. The windows were dark, the place truly did look abandoned. There were no lights outside of the building with the except of the lit torches at the entrance. Seungri strained to listen for any sounds or screams coming from inside the building but heard nothing.

“Ji are you sure this place is open?” Seungri whispered to Jiyong who was bouncing with excitement.

“If it wasn’t open then would people be lining up. Don’t worry this will be fun.”

Jiyong took his hand out from his pocket to grab Seungri’s before returning it to his pocket. Seungri stood closer to Jiyong before resting his head on Jiyong’s shoulder. He knew Jiyong would never lead him wrong, and he just had to have faith that whatever reviews Jiyong read must have been right. A bit of fear of what was to come started snaking it’s way through Seungri’s body, a bit of excitement was also starting to mix it’s self in. The two slowly moved forward towards the door as they listened to the other couples laugh and tease one another.

One couple at a time were allowed through the door, sometimes it took a while before another couple was allowed entry and other times it was fast. When they were close enough to the door they were trying to listen every time it opened for some kind of sound from inside but heard nothing. The man dressed in all black with a hood over his face was also of no help. The man simply stood there and opened the door when it was time. There was no radio on him that they could see so the two assumed he had an ear piece in. The adrenaline was coursing through both of their bodies as they became the next couple to enter. Seungri’s body was starting to tremble a bit, whether it was from the cold air, the fear of the unknown or a mix of them both he wasn’t sure.

The hooded man simply opened the door and waited for the two men to enter. Jiyong went first pulling Seungri behind him. The door shut not with a thud but with softness that had it not been for the deafening silence from being cut off from the outside they would have never known it was closed. The two looked around the entrance that looked like any entrance to a haunted house. Corny Halloween decorations were thrown about on the walls, fake mummies and dead bodies were off in the corners. The light in the room came from a large neon sign that hung over a door that said enter. Jiyong pulled Seungri by the hand as he opened the door that lead to a stairway going down.

“I guess that’s why we couldn’t hear anything.” Jiyong said as he began his decent.

Their feet made loud clanking noises each step they took down the metal stairs. Single bulbs on a strand illuminated their way down. The closer to the bottom the more sounds they heard. Loud thunderous screams and shrills could be heard mixed in with the sounds of zapping and cracks. Jiyong looked back at Seungri with his wide grin, the look of absolute excitement helped fight back the unease Seungri was feeling. Seungri could take just about anything but haunted houses did freak the younger man out a bit. Yet every year he put his own fear aside to make Jiyong happy whom loved everything spooky.

When they finally reached the bottom of the stairs they were met yet again with a door but this one was metal on a sliding pole. Jiyong grabbed the handle and slid it to the side to allow them entry. Once the two were inside the door slid back into place with a large crashing noise. The room they were now in was pitch black save for black twinkle lights that were strung from the ceiling. Seungri moved to stand behind Jiyong grabbing onto the back of his jacket as Jiyong moved forward in the darkness. The two men slowly moved forward and Seungri noticed that the room seemed to be getting smaller as they went, as if the walls were coming closer to them.

“Ji?” Seungri whispered.

“I know stay close to me.”

Seungri pushed himself as close as he could get to Jiyong as the two moved down further. The walls weren’t really walls, they noticed they were some kind of hard cloth that was soft in some areas. The two continued to move or rather squeeze through the tight space when suddenly hands pushed against the fabric trying to grab the two men. Seungri had let out a yelp when the hands first appeared causing Jiyong to laugh a bit. Jiyong thought this was rather interesting but not that scary.

When they finally were at the end of the dark room they walked through another door that lead to a kitchen where it was set up as a bloody mess. Green glow in the dark arrows were painted on the floor to show them their way out. The two men took in the room and noticed a robotic figure at the counter cutting in a jutted motion down on another fake torso.

“Do you think we should get their number? This room is set up in such detail, maybe they could help with some MVs in the future.”

Before Seungri even had a chance to respond the two were passing the table with the torso when suddenly the torso sat up and reached out for the two as he let out a large scream. Both Jiyong and Seungri screamed as they jumped back away from the now alive torso. Jiyong grabbed Seungri’s hand and tried to comfort him, the whole time he himself was scared and his heart was rapidly beating. Leading the way out passed the screaming man the two walked through the door and into another room.

The room they were now in was set up as a living room with an active fireplace. Sitting in front of the fireplace was a man and woman sipping from glasses. The room was warm and had a pleasant aroma to the room. Jiyong thought long and hard on what the smell was and the only thing he could picture was a memory of a past holiday. One where him and Seungri had jetted off for the weekend to a ski resort, the two of them had stayed locked up in their villa far enough away from everyone that they knew they would not be disturbed. The whole weekend the two were lost in each other, they had barely left their bedroom except for the need of food.

Jiyong was brought out of his memory just as he was walking by the couch when suddenly a bloody hand shot out from underneath the couch grabbing onto Jiyong’s ankle. Jiyong yelled a loud “fuck” as he tried to shake off the hand that was attached to him. Seungri was shouting for the hand to let go when suddenly the fireplace exploded sending fire out but not far enough to engulf the two men. Both of them jumped back as Jiyong tugged hard enough that he didn’t care if it ripped the limb from the person under him. Seungri covered his face from the heat as the fire went back into the fireplace. Meanwhile Jiyong was searching for the two people who were previously sitting on floor in front.

“Where is the couple?” Jiyong asked out loud.

Seungri uncovered his face and began looking for the couple when a soft whisper caused both men to jump again. “Would you two care for a drink?”

Jiyong and Seungri spun around to find that the couple that was previously in front of the fireplace was now behind them offering them a cup of red liquid.

“Ahh no thanks.” Seungri respectfully declined as he grabbed onto Jiyong and ran out of the room and into the next area.

“What the fuck was that?” Jiyong asked.

“I don’t know, that was crazy. Do you think they planned that?”

“That’s some crazy special effects. How did they contain the fire?”

The sound of classical music filled the room as the lights came flickering to life. Jiyong looked up and into the new room they were in as they noticed 3 couples dancing around the room in a waltz. The attire they were in was that of the 17th century, the women’s dresses matched that of the men. Black fabric with gold threaded detail blended into the red silk of the swaying dresses. The men’s clothing was also black but instead of gold detail theirs were blood red. The faces of the dancers were painted white with their eyes blacked out. On top of their heads were old fashioned white wigs with the women’s hairs done up in extravagant updos.

“This is weird, the room doesn’t even look like it belongs in the warehouse.” Seungri commented as he looked around the room.

“It doesn’t, how are there windows down here?” Jiyong said as he stepped forward.

Suddenly two men appeared out of nowhere in front of them, they bowed before them, then extended their hands out.

“I think they want to dance.” Jiyong said.

“I don’t know if I want to dance with them.” Seungri responded back as he stepped closer to Jiyong.

The two men shrugged their shoulders before taking one another into their arms and spinning off out on to the dance floor.

“Ji how do we get out of this room. There are no arrows.”

J

iyong looked on the floor and the walls and noticed there was no sign as to how to exit the room. Grabbing onto Seungri’s hand Jiyong started walking out into the dance floor looking for a way out. A crash of thunder sounded, and the lights went out causing them to come to a hault.

“Ji…”

“Don’t let go of my hand.”

When the lights came back on the room had changed, gone was the lavish dance floor. What was surrounding them was a blood bath. The men all laid out on the floor their throats slashed as blood poured out from their wound like rivers. The women stood above them looking down with their bloody daggers still in their hands.

“Ji we need to leave.” Seungri whispered as to not draw attention to themselves.

The whispering was in vain as the women all at once raised their heads and looked at the two men left standing. Like soldiers the women all stood straight before walking towards them. The lights began to flicker, Seungri was gripping on to Jiyong’s hand as he watched the lights go in and out as the women advanced towards them. Just before the women reached them the lights went completely out, Jiyong could hear Seungri whimpering next to him. The lights came back and the women had formed a circle around them but the faces that were once painted white were now replaced with ones that had hollowed out cheeks and sunken in eyes. They looked as if they hadn’t been fed in years and were starving. The once blacked out eyes now color to them, they were red and looking at both Jiyong and Seungri as if they were a thanksgiving feast. Beyond the women Jiyong could see an exit sign glowing in blue letters. Where that was the whole time he didn’t know.

“Ri we need to run towards that sign. Hang on tight.” Jiyong said as he laced his fingers with Seungri’s.

“What…”

Jiyong didn’t even answer but instead took off in a mad dash pushing passed the women and towards the door. Screams could be heard along with the sounds of swooshing fabric, Jiyong knew they were being chased and that they needed to get to the door. Moving faster he finally reached the door and pushed it open before pulling Seungri through it and slamming it shut just as the women were reaching them. Seungri was bent over gasping for breath, he had removed his face mask needing all the oxygen he could get.

“Ji I love you, but I want out of this place.” Seungri said as he stood up.

Jiyong walked over to Seungri and pulled him into his arms, he could feel his body shaking in fear. “Don’t worry, I will get you out of this.” Jiyong reassured Seungri.

The room they were in now was a basic hallway with another sign that glowed in yellow. There didn’t seem to be any tricks set up for this room as the two walked towards the door. Pushing past it they entered a bedroom now. The room was just as lavish as the ballroom. A grand king sized bed sat in the middle of the room, mirrors were positioned above it and on one side of the wall was a fireplace with a fire heating the room up. Jiyong took in the room and noticed two doors but neither had a sign above it.

“Which door should we take?” Jiyong asked.

“I don’t know, why don’t we open both and see where it takes us.”

Jiyong and Seungri moved forward but when they reached the bed one of the doors opened and a billow of steam escaped from the door as a man walked out. The man was tall with black long hair that curled at the bottom. His skin looked flawless with his pink lips pulled into a smile. The man had a black silk robe left open with matching black silk pajama pants, he rested his body up against the door frame as he took in the two that stood before him. Seungri felt as if the man was undressing him with the way he was looking at him, that smile was still on his face but the look in his eyes screamed hunger. Jiyong noticed the way Seungri was fidgeting under the mysterious man’s gaze and stepped in front of him to shield him from the looks.

That move made the man laugh and push off the door frame, the way he moved along the floor had Jiyong questioning if he was even touching the ground. He moved with such grace but at the same time exuded sex appeal. The air surrounding them began to feel heavy the closer the man came to them. Jiyong made sure that Seungri was behind him as the man finally reached them. The man raised his hand up so that his delicate fingers brushed up against Jiyong’s cheek causing his skin to break out in goosebumps.

“Such a protective man is your mate that special?” The man’s voice was soft and delicate but had an aurora of nobility to it.

Jiyong let out a low growl.

“I see.” The man responded, he looked past Jiyong and right into Seungri’s eyes. “He does look delicate; his eyes shine as if they have seen years and years of pain.”

“Leave him alone.”

“I would never force myself upon a lovely man such as him. No, I wait for them to beg me to touch them and they always do.”

“He won’t.” Jiyong responded to the remark in a deep voice that Seungri had not heard in years.

“Oh you both will, but I am getting ahead of myself. I have an offer for the both of you.”

“We don’t want it.” Jiyong said as he stood taller, trying to make himself look more intimidating.

“Just listen to my offer little dragon. If you don’t want to take me up on it then I will let you both walk out of here.”

“Ji just listen so we can go.” Seungri finally spoke up, he wanted out of there.

“Fine.” Jiyong said as he glared at the man.

“I don’t offer this to just anyone but you two caught my attention. How did a delicate panda catch the eyes of a little dragon? Such a coupling must be looked down upon by everyone. Yet in my world it wouldn’t be. No, you two would be celebrated. Your love would be able to bloom and grow as it should. What I offer is a life, free to love the way you want. Free of any hate and unacceptance. You will have a longer lifetime to live out your life, free to do and see the world. I only ask that you share one night with me in my bed.”

“Are you a vampire?” Jiyong asked.

“I suppose you could say that, except I don’t fear the sun, crosses, or other holy objects. I am free to walk in the sun, I can eat food just as anyone else, and I don’t age. Do I drink blood? Yes I do, blood is life after all.”

“So you want to drink our blood?” Seungri stuttered out.

“Yes, but not too much. I take my blood in the throes of passion. The taste is richer and less painful.”

“So you want to fuck us and drink our blood and then we become vampires too?”

“Little dragon you have such a dirty mouth, I wonder what else you would do with it. But to answer your question yes. So what say you? Will you give me what I ask, or will you walk out this door.”

Jiyong shook his head, “We will pass on your offer. We very much like our life right now.”

“You want to stay in hiding? You want to keep your love for one another hidden from the world because you fear what people will say?” The man asked as he crossed his arms.

“Yes, even though we might never have the acceptance of the fans we both will continue to live our life the way we are. Some day we will come out to share our love for one another with our fans. But for right now we are happy. We have the love and support of everyone close to us. That is enough for us to continue.”

The man smiled as he uncrossed his arms and put one hand in his pocket and pulled out a black business card. He handed it over to Jiyong, “If at any point you want to change your mind you need only call that number. This life isn’t as bad as you think. It is freedom, where yours is prison.”

Jiyong nodded his head before grabbing onto Seungri and walking towards the other door, the whole time he made sure that he was positioned in between the man and Seungri. Once through the door they found themselves at another set of metal stairs that lead up and out of the building. Once they were out of the building they walked back around to find the lot was empty except for Jiyong’s car. The two made a mad dash towards the car and got in slamming the doors shut and locking them. Jiyong started the car up and tore out of the lot jumping back on the highway and heading back to the city.

When the two finally arrived at their apartment they sat on the couch. Neither had spoken a word since they left the warehouse.

“Ji where did you find that place.”

“It was on the list of the top 5 haunted houses in Seoul. They had really good reviews but none of them mentioned any of the rooms. It sounded like a normal haunted house so I thought it would be fine. Had I known it was going to be like that I would never had taken you there.”

“Do you think he was a real vampire?”

“Vampires aren’t real.”

“Then how do you explain the fire and the rest of the stuff that went on in there.”

“I don’t know, but let’s just forget about it. How about we watch a movie.”

“A happy movie?”

“Of course, what shall we watch? The little mermaid or lilo and stich?”

Seungri smiled as he scooted closer to Jiyong getting himself comfortable as Jiyong turned the tv on. The thoughts of the possible vampire and what he offered swam through Seungri’s mind. It was a tempting offer, but he had to have faith that their fans would support the couple no matter what.

[lim-lifeinmotion]

A story about a boy just a little bit broken

I would like to tell you a story About a boy that is broken Not by much Only just a little bit if at all You see this boy was a happy child He did normal happy child things He’d play and sing and dance Even if not very good but oh how this boy liked to play In the mud, mud pies, mud soup He liked the mud he did Stuck in the mud, mud scrub, mud bath mud, mud, mud, mud, mud He was an odd little child, Liked playing with barbie dolls, ken dolls He had no preference really And eating snails He enjoyed spending time with his friends Although mum made this difficult sometimes You see mum didnt always agree with the other mums Im sorry you cannot see them anymore But that is okay because he had plenty of other friends to play with But none were like them He felt sad and lonely Where are all my friends? This boy also loved to fish! What a thing it was Spending time with dad who he never really saw One weekend away this little boy had a new friend Of who’m he’d like to play! A new friend he thought  “I’m so happy” Mummy and daddy should we play? Allright said the little boy He knew nothing better Down his pants went I dont understand why? Touches his pee pee Nobody can touch that? But a new friend is a new friend “This is our little secret”? Okay So everynow and then They’d play mummy and daddy She was a lot older  He was only 3 he didn’t know any better He did not want her to touch his pee pee Or lick his private parts But a new friend is a new friend Will everyone be angry? So as the years went by mummy and daddy wouldn’t stop fighting To count the days when they were happy? He was young but even he could count as high as 10? It’s all your fault we fight they said Time and time again If it weren’t for you kinds we wouldn’t have these problems “I don’t want to be the problem”? How do I not be the problem? Be a better boy, listen a little more, Maybe if i stay home I can show mummy I‘m a good boy I dont want you to go away This little boy found a new friend!  Hip hip horaay He was so happy and excited A reason to wake up every day But this boy could never stay over Not for a whole night What if mummy was gone when I get home? Please take me home, I want to go home now. Once more mummy disagrees with the other mummy, I am sorry you cannot see them any more I’m sorry I’m not supposed to talk to you I have to listen to what mummy says Now they wont stop fighting, And we’re moving in with my aunty I liked her dog and her pool and her piano A few years we were happy, no more yelling at last But as this boy got older He saw his sister being yelled at Please stop fighting I don’t like to see you all cry When she was 15 she had had enough He didn’t want her to go but knew mummy would be happier if she did So she did We were happy again Daddy came home but the fighting continued Only with my other sister now It wasn’t long before she moved out  A few years into highschool You see everyone in this family Was in the top of their clases They were not dumb or stupid They weere in fact extremely smart Nerissa was good at english,

 drawing, she was also a very nice singer Tyla was good at netball and maths, she was so popular and so was nissy Ryan was good at maths and art and really enjoyed running and sports, He wasn’t the storngest but he could run and never look back But now everyone had moved out And I was again all alone The boy had no friends Although everypne knew who he was At school he’d walk and chat Bounce between groups making them smile and laugh You’re so funny ryan So many friends now! But on the weekends it was playstation and games Nobody wanted to hang out with him  Out of uniform he really didnt belong And the yelling started again His entire life he did not think it would ever be him? But im such a good boy mummy I try my best every day Until one day It was time to leave You see out of nowhere he met a boy A boy he fell in love with Someone that liked him, thought was funny and kind It’s all he’d ever wanted The boys became close They shared their first kiss Their first everything What a time to be young, to be alive He would get bullied  By the younger students Because the older ones knew his sisters Everybody loved them But they no longer went to school They both left way too young They were so smart and so popular I dont understand why? But this boy didn’t care The silly words people would say He was happy and in love He finally had a friend He started living with this boy, His family were like his own No fighting no yelling A safe and peaceful home for two years they lived together until they grew apart When you’re young you are curious There is so much to live for to see and to do He began to see the darkness again His home was gone again He had no friends The words now had power He tried but he let them in Fag they would say Push and shove him they would do In class he cried At home he died He began to wonder about death How beautiful it would be So he took the knife and made his first cut An addicion he would soon regret At first they were small On the wrist because thats were people did it right? But too many eyes saw  You cannot wear an armband all year So he took the knife and took to his thigh So much more flesh to cut I can go deeper and harder now than before This boy truly wanted to die Bloody sheets  Vodka bottles He stopped going to classes But did all his work He didnt want to be a drop out But he didnt want to go to school So in a bottle of chi he’d mix A bottle before, during and after school Nobody suspected a thing, He never wore uniform anyways He was never rude or inpolite The opposite in fact He had to be a good boy He had a job which he quit Becausee he drank and cut and cried Nothing could stop it A part of him had died So he decided he needed money Skipped a few weeks rent Was told they needed to talk So up he went and left He didnt mean to hurt them He didnt want to be a burden They found the bottles and the bloodied mess He didn’t want to make them angry So back he went “home” To the yelling and screaming The rules oh the rules Do not exist From here things fall apart and there is no more rhymes That little happy child, he was dead now, he died a long time ago and all that was left was darkness, sadness, an anti depressant shell He spent his days drinking and taking drugs and cutting himself. Nothing made sense, the only clear thing in his existance was the fact that he no longer wanted to be in this world and he made it clear that he was just waiting to die. I missed a lot out of this story, a lot of good things happened, he was so loved but honestly those memories are all but faded and bleak lost somewhere in the dpeth of the lonliness he had felt his entire lfe, the sadness, the emptiness that filled him. He was annorexic and coudln’t eat, he saw his weight go from 64 down to 48 where it would stay for some time. He met a lot of amazing guys but none felt right, none gave him that feeling that young cute boy did and no matter how hard he tried all he ended up leaving was a wake of destruction and hurt wherever he went. I could count 10 different people he ended up destroying, 2 earned the label. He never intended to hurt them, he really tried, he just wanted to feel loved, to feel something, anything at all. But never could. He sold his body for sex at the age of 17, he needed money to continue drinking and living because partying to forget was all he knew. What a messed up life this poor child had, no wonder he’s a god damn mess until the other day he knew anything bad that could have happened had happened to him, the other day when he remembered he was molested. He’s been raped by his best friend, molested when he was a child, sold for sex, beaten, thrown to the ground, abandoned on the side of the road by his parents. literally kicked out of the car at 3 or 4 years old and I just remember him standing behind the car screaming and crying, begging to let him back in. He been cheated on, drugged, ruphied, overdosed and died. He’s tried to kill himself on more occasions than I can count of both hands and both feet. He’s put himself in hospital but never once has he intentionally tried to hurt someone, Never has he ever laid another finger on another human being that he hasn’t blacked out and done in a fit of rage, childhood trauma is funny like that. I am not a bad person and I know this to be true but I feel like there is little more that life could throw at me, little more that I can have done to me because I have seen it all, been through it all and I am so angry at the world for this. For so long I see eyes that reflect the soul, I know how to play this game, I managed to trick myself into believing I was happy in order to stop myself from killing myself, you can sure as hell bet I will trick you too. When you look into my eyes and you see that pure innocent smile, that cheeky grin, the light sparking as it fills you with that infections glow. Sure some of the time it is genuine but for the most part I am just so sad and there is no way I want to put that onto anybody else, ssssssssso I will fool you into believing I am happy and so damn peaceful but my actions reflect someone so broken, so detroyed, someone that has next to no love or respect for themselves because how can I? After everything? Im working so fucking hard to make this work, to re learn the things I had stripped away from me, pice by piece, like tiny cracks forming on the glass I was constantly trying to fix and mend but like so many cracks I couldn’t keep up with the speed at which they were forming and shaterring. I became so very good at fixing them but now I am left with a broken soul, A shattered mind, a scarred body, left trying to yet again mend the pieces but she is so very tired, a life without a brake and I am ready to put the brakes on before I break because breaking is all I know how to do, breaking is what I do best but I just need a brake because it will break me otherwise. I know I am such a powerful person, I am so god damn resiliant yet still so fucking loving regardless of all this shit. I wonder sometimes how the fuck I am still here, kicking, working, moving forward trying to make a better life for myself, because with all this on a page and missing quite a lot, that is too much for one 24 years of “life”, That is too much for anyone to endure. I havent even mentioned my sisters life, how they both tried to kill themselves, “Home” was that bad that they would rather have died than exist. My youngest sisters boyfriend killed himself when she was 16 or so, she wanted to follow, had a note and the noose all ready. How much shit can life throw at somebody before it really is just starting to take the piss, I feel my life is just one big fucking joke because no way can this be real, no way can this be the reason I was put on this earth for. If there was a god why would he look at a 3 year old and smile telling him he was going to be sexually assaulted time and time again, beaten and abused for the rest of his 25 years in the world. How fucking dare you. How fucking dare you. This may seem like I am asking for pity but that I do not want, I don’t need your sympathy because it makes no god damn difference o me, It doesnt change the chemicals in my brain, it doesn’t give me a reason to get up in the morning or give me comfort in bed at night. I want you to know how fucking cruel this life has been and why I am so god damn fuking messed up in the deepest and darkest way possible. “Why” is the big question of endless possibilities but this is one of those reasons, one of the many possibilies, the endless ways my life could have gone and destiny looked at me and chose this path for me. Fuck you, Just fuck you and your bullshit lenses about flowers and fairies, I grew up with the monsters under my bed, the headless horseman was my ride through hell and back, Samara was my pen pall and nobody was there for me in the end to protect me, I can’t even protect me, I can’t say no to people so I just close my eyes, pretend to be enjoying it and let it happen. Fuck you Unedited rant because fuck reading this to edit its way too fucking much

[patriotsnet]

Why Are Republicans So Afraid Of Trump

New Post has been published on https://www.patriotsnet.com/why-are-republicans-so-afraid-of-trump/

Why Are Republicans So Afraid Of Trump

Officer Goes From ‘sadness’ To ‘rage’

Why Are Republicans Still So Afraid Of Trump? | The 11th Hour | MSNBC

Sicknicks partner on the Capitol police, Sandra Garza, wrote an essay about the attack and the aftermath in which she said in part, I saw officers being brutalized and beaten, and protesters defying orders to stay back from entering the Capitol. All the while, I kept thinking, Where is the President? Why is it taking so long for the National Guard to arrive? Where is the cavalry!?

She added, As the months passed, my deep sadness turned to outright rage as I watched Republican members of Congress lie on TV and in remarks to reporters and constituents about what happened that day. Over and over they denied the monstrous acts committed by violent protesters.;

For example, when Gosar called the Jan. 6 attackers peaceful patriots.

During the Benghazi hearings, Republicans were laser-focused on trying to place blame on then-Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. But after four years of investigations, most of them purely partisan affairs, they found no evidence of criminal wrongdoing on her part.

Republicans dont want anything close to that type of scrutiny on the Capitol attacks of Jan. 6. In fact, they dont seem to want any scrutiny at all.

Almost as if they know what will be found.

Almost as if I didnt have to use the word almost.

Reach Montini at .

Trump Is Here To Stay And Republicans Should Be Worried

There are Republican office holders who genuinely embrace Trump. For other leading GOP politicians and strategists, it’s a calculation: placate Trump and his crazy stuff now, win the Congress next year and start to move on.

That’s a fantasy.

The narcissistic former president is incapable of just going away. The Trump brand hardly suffers though it seems every week a new book comes out on his tragic governance and those from people without subpoena power.

Start with the 2020 election, which should be history; Biden won the popular vote handily and the electoral college with several states to spare. That has been validated by Republican state officials, dozens of court cases, Congress and Trump’s own attorney general and vice president. It was more clear-cut than Trump’s victory four years earlier and two other presidential elections in this century.

Time to move on, right? Trump won’t allow it.

Trump is an effective demagogue. Six years ago, he had many Republicans questioning whether Barack ObamaBarack Hussein ObamaWhere is Joe Biden’s ‘red line’?Newsom recall spurs unprecedented turnout campaignBiden is steering America to lose asymmetric warsMORE really was born in the United States, even though Obamas 1961 birth in Hawaii was in the newspaper.;

Actually, the former president could take credit for the rapid development of the extraordinarily effective vaccines but this might help Biden, avoiding which apparently motivates Trump more than the lives he might save.

Todays Republicans Really Hate Democrats And Democracy

1) Trumps supporters have embraced anti-democratic ideas

This chart shows results from a two-part survey, conducted in late 2020 and early 2021, of hardcore Trump supporters. The political scientists behind the survey, Rachel Blum and Christian Parker, identified so-called MAGA voters by their activity on pro-Trump Facebook pages. Their subjects are engaged and committed Republican partisans, disproportionately likely to influence conflicts within the party like primary elections.

These voters, according to Blum and Parker, are hostile to bedrock democratic principles.

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John Kasich Says Republicans Are ‘afraid’ Of Trump

EmbedEmbed

Former Ohio Gov. John Kasich speaks with NPR’s Leila Fadel about the GOP’s unwillingness to stand up to President Trump, who still refuses to accept the results of the presidential election.

LEILA FADEL, HOST:

Last night, President Trump received another loss in court. A federal judge in Pennsylvania dismissed the campaign’s attempts to stop the certification of Pennsylvania’s votes. This is just the latest of more than two dozen failed challenges brought by the Trump campaign to overturn the election results. President Trump refuses to concede, and for the most part, his party has supported his efforts to pursue legal challenges based on false allegations of widespread voter fraud.

Very few high-profile Republicans have publicly acknowledged Joe Biden as the winner, but one of them is John Kasich. He’s the former governor of Ohio and a 2016 Republican presidential candidate, and he joins us now.

Governor Kasich, welcome.

JOHN KASICH: Thanks, Leila. Glad to be with you.

FADEL: So you endorsed President-elect Joe Biden. He won this election. What do you make of President Trump’s attempts to overturn the results?

KASICH: It’s just absurd. The whole thing is – it’s just – it’s ridiculous. I mean, he has clearly won this election. And it is just sort of amazing to me that Republicans just keep sitting on their hands. It makes no sense.

FADEL: That was the former Republican governor of Ohio, John Kasich.

Governor Kasich, thanks for speaking with us.

Republicans Still Scared To Death Of Trump

Trump went on yet another unhinged rant this weekend during a speech to donors in Florida, attacking Mitch McConnell as a “stone cold loser” for refusing to go along with his attempt to steal the election, but you won’t find any profiles in courage in the GOP willing to stand up to him.

Case in point, on this weekend’s Fox News Sunday, South Dakota Republican Sen. John Thune was asked about Trump calling him “weak and inneffective RINO” earlier in the year and saying he might back a primary challenger to Thune. Thune responded telling host Chris Wallace that “I’ve been through wars in South Dakota, political wars, with my own party when I ran the first time, with the Democrats in a couple of hotly contested Senate races, so being afraid of a fight or somebody coming after me is not something that’s going to influence that decision,” but Thune refused to admonish Trump for his rhetoric, and refused to stand up for McConnell when asked about him as well.

Which is pretty much the equivalent of “I support Trump, but I really don’t like the tweeting” that we heard from so many of them over the last five or six years.

As the Fox article discussed, Trump called Thune “Mitch’s boy” when urging Gov. Kristi Noem to challenge Thune in 2022, but no amount of insults are apparently ever breaking point for these jellyfish.

Recommended Reading: Who Is Right Republicans Or Democrats

Why Republicans Are Scared Of Texas New Abortion Ban

For years, conservative legislators have passed increasingly restrictive abortion laws, knowing theyd be struck down by the courts. Now, Republicans are going to have to defend their views at the ballot box. And that might not go well for them.

At a pro-choice rally in Texas in 2013, one sign reads “Republicans, your seats aren’t safe.” | AP Photo/Eric Gay

09/18/2021 08:41 AM EDT

Link Copied

Sarah Isgur is a graduate of Harvard Law School who clerked on the Fifth Circuit. She was Justice Department spokeswoman during the Trump administration and is the host of the legal podcast Advisory Opinions for the Dispatch.

When the Supreme Court allowed Texas 6-week abortion law to stand earlier this month, it was presented asa major victory for anti-abortion conservatives. After all, Republican state legislators in deep red states have long been passing increasingly restrictive abortion laws, only to see many later get struck down in the courts. Finally, one law got through .

Whats going on? When considering the political ramifications of the Texas abortion law, Ian Malcoms famous line from Jurassic Park comes to mind, with a little social-wars twist: Your were so preoccupied with whether or not they could that they didnt stop to think if they should.

So the more relevant question is whether the abortion issue motivates voters in both political camps and which side it motivates more.

Filed Under:

As Gop Makes It Harder To Vote Few Republicans Dissent

ATLANTA In Arizona, a Republican state senator worried aloud that his partys proposed voter identification requirements might be too cumbersome. But he voted for the bill anyway.

In Iowa, the states Republican elections chief put out a carefully worded statement that didnt say whether he backs his own partys legislation making it more difficult to vote early.

And in Georgia, Republican Lt. Gov. Geoff Duncan left the room as Senate Republicans approved a bill to block early voting for all but the GOPs most reliable voting bloc. Duncan instead watched Mondays proceedings from a television in his office to protest.

This is what amounts to dissent as Republican lawmakers push a wave of legislation through statehouses across the nation to make voting more difficult. The bills are fueled by former President Donald Trumps false claims of widespread voter fraud and many are sponsored by his most loyal allies. But support for the effort is much broader than just Trumps hard-right base, and objections from GOP policymakers are so quiet they can be easy to miss.

Its a startling shift for a party whose voters in some states, such as Florida and Arizona, had embraced absentee and mail voting. Several Republican strategists note the party may be passing laws that only box out their own voters.

Read Also: When Did Republicans And Democrats Switch Platforms

An Effort To Investigate Was Blocked In The Senate

Its different with the Jan. 6 insurrection. After Republicans in the Senate blocked a bill to investigate, the House decided to investigate on its own.

This time around, however, all but two Republicans in the House Reps. Adam Kinzinger of Illinois and Liz Cheney of Wyoming voted against setting up a committee to find out what happened on;Jan. 6.

All of Arizonas Republican representatives voted no.;This would include Reps. Andy Biggs and Paul Gosar. You may recall that right-wing political activist Ali Alexander claimed that these two Arizona representatives worked with him to plan pro-Trump rallies, including the one that ended with an attack on the Capitol.

That kind of connection to the Capitol riot seems to be what Republicans are worried about. They;fear the exposure of possible;links between the rioters and Republicans, and the implications that may have for former President Donald Trump.

Gladys Sicknick, the mother of Brian Sicknick, said of the Republicans who voted not to investigate the event, I just dont believe anybody could vote no, it doesnt make sense.

Republicans Can Govern Without Winning A Majority That Threatens Our Democracy

âRepublicans Are Afraid Of Donald Trumpâ Despite Election Loss, Kasie Hunt Says | TODAY

So, lets talk about why Cheney is once again on the chopping block and what that means for the Republican Party moving forward that is, can we finally stop debating whether the GOP is Trumps party now?;

But first: the role of the Big Lie. For a while now, refusing to accept the results of the 2020 election has proven a fealty test of sorts to Trump, and its one Cheney has refused to take. How much of that is responsible for Cheneys current situation versus her politics being increasingly out of step with the rest of the party?

related:Bidens Push For Big Government Solutions Is Popular Now But It Could Backfire Read more. »

nrakich :Its the entire reason for her current situation, Sarah.

Ideologically, Cheney is a faithful conservative at least as conservatism used to be defined. According to DW-Nominate, which uses voting records to quantify the ideology of every member of Congress on a scale from 1 to -1 , she has a score of 0.515.

And according to FiveThirtyEights Trump Score, she voted in line with Trumps position 93 percent of the time. Instead, her main transgression appears to be not going along with the Big Lie .

micah : Yeah, agreed. The idea that Cheneys troubles are about policy the argument that her hawkish foreign policy views or her free-trade-y views are behind her split with the bulk of the GOP is a bit silly?

Americans are living in two different realities right now.

micah: Yeah, agreed.

Thats scary!

Don’t Miss: When Did Republicans And Democrats Switch Platforms

Is The Census Wrong

nrakich: I agree that its circular, Micah. The reason more Republican elites dont criticize Trump is that theyre afraid of his voters punishing them. But what they dont seem to realize is that they themselves also have power to shape those voters opinions! Theres a lot of evidence in political science that elites can shape public opinion.

sarah: Do GOP elites, though? So much of Trumps story in 2016 and 2020 was about the high voter turnout that he was responsible for driving. And although I think we should question how much turnout helped the GOP in 2020, there does seem to be an unspoken fear among GOP elites that these voters arent really Republicans now that is, they wont turn out for anyone other than Trump which is why so many GOP elites are scared to break with Trumps messaging.

micah: What do you all think would happen public opinion-wise if Republicans in Washington came out hard against the Big Lie but Trump and state-level Republicans kept it going?

nrakich: To be clear, it would be a political risk for Republican politicians to come out forcefully against the Big Lie. A solid chunk of the party would likely stand by Trump and continue to think the election was stolen. But it could lead to serious infighting within the GOP. At least, though, our democracy would be on a healthier path.;

But, hey, Im not staring down midterms.

micah: I think they are not long for this world.

I mean, how many are even left?

sarah: Or John Kasich.

Republican Party Faces Rage From Both Pro

By Peter Eisler, Chris Kahn, Tim Reid, Simon Lewis, Jarrett Renshaw

13 Min Read

WASHINGTON – After riots at the U.S. Capitol by President Donald Trumps supporters, the Republican Party is facing defections from two camps of voters it cant afford to lose: those saying Trump and his allies went too far in contesting the election of Democrat Joe Biden – and those saying they didnt go far enough, according to new polling and interviews with two dozen voters.

Paul Foster – a 65-year-old house painter in Ellsworth, Maine – is furious at party leaders for refusing to back the presidents claims that the election was stolen with millions of fraudulent votes. The party is going to be totally broken if it abandons Trump, Foster says, predicting Trump loyalists will spin off into a new third party.

I just wish he would run away with his tail between his legs, Cupelo says.

Though Republicans have now lost control of the White House and both houses of Congress in just four years, Trumps base remains a potent electoral force in the party. That base helped him capture more voters some 74 million than any Republican in history. The vast majority of his supporters, including 70% of Republicans, remain loyal, according to new Reuters/Ipsos polling conducted days after last weeks riot at the Capitol, and many activists say theyre willing to abandon the GOP for any perceived slight against their leader.

Recommended Reading: Dinesh D’souza The Big Switch

Republicans Are Suddenly Afraid Of Democracy

Were not a democracy, Republican Senator Mike Lee tweeted in the middle of Wednesday nights vice-presidential debate. He was reacting to something hed heard onstage there, in his home state of Utah. Another tweet: The word democracy appears nowhere in the Constitution, perhaps because our form of government is not a democracy. Its a constitutional republic. To me it matters. It should matter to anyone who worries about the excessive accumulation of power in the hands of the few. Hours after the debate Lee was still worrying the thought: Democracy isnt the objective; liberty, peace, and prospefity are. We want the human condition to flourish. Rank democracy can thwart that.

Why did Lee choose this momentless than four weeks before an election in which his party seems likely to suffer defeatto make the familiar, even pedantic, point that we live in a republic rather than a pure democracy? Why did he insist on the point so vehemently that he neglected to mention that power in the American system ultimately lies with the people, which means that our system could also be called a representative democracy? Did he mean rank as in foul, rancid, or outright? If the last, does that mean the tyranny of the majority leading to perverse rule by the few? What did this short, misleading course in Civics 101 have to do with anything?

Time To Reckon With Gop Radicalization

The lies about 2020 and the increasing dedication to destroying democratic institutions in the quest for power are inextricable from one another. As Jay Rosen says, the press is comfortable calling out the former it can be packaged as a fact check.” But being forthright about the latter requires depicting one party as far and away the only primary threat to our democratic stability. Thats accurate, but its uncomfortably adversarial.

Relatedly, describing Republicans as cowards who fear Trump casts their machinations as mere reluctant efforts to cope with externally imposed circumstances theyd prefer not to be dealing with. This lets Republicans off the hook in a very fundamental way. It risks misleading the country about the true depths of GOP radicalization and the real dangers it poses.

Read more:

Also Check: How Many Democrats And Republicans Are In The House

[kawaiibeela]

2017 in review... i guess?

so i guess im gonna do this lol... its not really a review of my year but i will talk about a few major personal things over the past few months that happened to me, LONG LONG LONGGGGG POST UNDER THE CUT

a lot of people complained about 2017 being a shitty year, a continuation for 2016..... and i thought it would be too.... and thats how it started.... i was stuck in a crappy job for 6 years.... i wanted to leave so badly but i was also scared.... scared that what if i couldn’t find anything else? scared in my skills as a graphic designer.... i hated all my work and everything i produced from that job, i got comfortable at this job.... i could come and go as i pleased, i could take any day off i wanted.... but they were toxic people, they judged me very hard for liking the things i did, they were very negative about everything, they forced stuff on me that wasn’t part of my job, they made me feel very awkward, they would make “comments” about my religion when it didn’t fit their needs...it was very uncomfortable at times.... i would just lie to myself and to other people when asked “how’s work going?” i would say “not bad, its pretty good, i’m doing some fun events” but i was slowly drowning inside.... my parents and close friends would always tell me “you need to quit!!! just quit!!! find something better!! you’re better than this place” but i never believed it..... i never believed them..... when i should have been listening to them....

i started to tell myself, this is enough.... i cant deal with this place any more.... i started to work on my portfolio website.... but i hated it..... i hated everything about it..... everything in there just reminded me of my old shitty job that i hated... all this effort put into something that i hated... because i was forced to do what the clients wanted, it was frustrating!!

a few years ago, i went to this graphic design conference that was meant to help people find jobs, i went to a portfolio review and all 3 reviewers told me the same thing, the work i put in seem forced and not my style, they said to add stuff i was passionate about and stuff that i enjoyed and my work would speak for itself, every person that i showed my arashi posters too, said it was my strongest piece.... i should use that piece for sure!!

that helped me get a sense of what i wanted!! i deleted everything from my old portfolio site, except my logo which i actually still love, i kept 1 project from my old job which was the biggest and most challenging one i worked on to show that i have real life experience.

i decided to develop my arashi project into a full campaign, i added more pieces, i designed more stuff, for the fun of it.... every weekend for a while in the spring and summer, my friends and i were meeting up at cafes to help focus on stuff, i got a lottttt done there!!! i wanted to focus on stuff that was important to me, fandoms!! duh!! arashi of course, kiramune which had recently at the time become my new loves, and oldcodex!!! i decided to try and make designs based on them for fun!! i took kirafes 2017′s design and I remade it for myself, i imagined how i wanted the goods to look, i imagined how i wanted the posters to look, the pamphlet, and it took forever, but it was fun, it was frustrating but it was rewarding to come up with something i was proud of!! something i was happy about!! something that when i talked about it, i could explain what i wanted to and why i did certain things. 

for the oldcodex stuff, i made an editorial piece, i wanted to reflect their personalities so i just kept trying different things until i was happy!! in the end it came out really great and i was able to do that piece pretty fast as well too!!

i also kept in my portfolio parts of a magazine that i had worked on.... but i wasnt happy with a lot of parts of that magazine too... so i made my own pages to “add in” about the olympics and they came out really nice!!

i was confident in my portfolio for once.... it took months and months of work.... but i was happy about it... i was proud of it.... i was excited about it.... but...... i was scared..... scared i wasnt ready for the next step.... what if i put all this effort into it and im still not good enough? how will i feel then? i also hate going to interviews because of my anxiety as well too....

but finally around the beginning of September, i was actually able to 100% complete my portfolio, my business cards and resumes were also complete...

and i was scrolling down on facebook... and one of my old friends posted something..... we were really close during college, we took graphic design together but as the semesters went on, we drifted apart as well too... it had been probably like 4-5 years since i’d ever talked to her even.... but she posted “looking for a junior graphic designer for a 3 month contract” and i kinda looked at that for a while... i messaged one of my friends about it and said “hmmmm...... my friend just posted this.... what should i do?” and she told me “just message your friend and apply!!! just do it” she gave me that push because she knew how much i hated my current job too!! 

so i messaged my friend and asked her if she could submit my resume to HR.... and she did.... that was on friday.... i was scared.... and nervous.....but then... on a tuesday after work..... my phone rang and i got a call from the company..... its a photography company here in Toronto that has locations across Canada. they wanted me in for an interview.... a what??? wait what??? an interview???? they said they looked at my portfolio and were interested....... ehhhhh??? i was in shock..... but i was so happy too!! but scared..... the last interview i went on was like 2-3 years ago and it went pretty bad......... so i had no idea how this one would go..... the HR person was really nice though... she had told me that i would be interviewed by herself, the marketing manager and the art director.... i was scared as hell..... she gave me their names so i looked them up.... the art director........ he was so good..... his website was so nice!!! i started to lose confidence again but, its funny.... he was japanese.... i thought “oh crap, what if he tries to read parts of my portfolio?” i had used japanese interviews in my kiramune project but i couldnt find stuff for each member so i just copied and pasted, i thought “hes gonna know im just making stuff up” LOL I just kept thinking of useless thoughts in my head..... but i thought.... whatever.... im just gonna do it...... my interview was on thursday, i had called my old job and told them i couldnt work that day and they said it was fine because it was a really slow time... i obviously didnt tell them i was going for a job interview.... but i went anyways, i got there really early so i just sat somewhere and went over stuff i had planned for my interview, i had written stuff down in my journal and was gonna use that as a guideline for when they asked me questions, they asked some things similar to what i had planned but they asked some different stuff too... they were so nice.... throughout the interview they had kept complimenting my stuff, they said everything flowed very nicely and they really liked me work, they had asked me how i got interested in design and i answered the most face palming thing.... i mentioned anime... and i said i used to watch anime and pokemon as a kid and i dreamt of being an animator in japan and then i was like “oh no.... i didnt just tell them im a weeb did it?” and i was like “oh god, my life is over” haha i felt really embarassed ahaha oops LOL but then they were also really impressed by that answer too.... they asked if i had any retail experience and i told them i had experience working at this amusement park after high school too and it helped me deal with customers and stuff too... this was a job i had from like 10 years ago or something, it wasnt even on my resume any more, is just one of those jobs u get to make money.... like..... i thought nothing of it..... but they were SO EXCITED about it when i told them, they were like “wow!!! thats so great!!” they seemed so intrigued in everything i said!! the HR person was like “you seem very energetic!!” and i was like really happy!! no one really compliments me or my work usually haha XD 

towards the end of the interview, they asked if i had any questions for them and i asked them 2 questions and they seemed really impressed too!! haha they were like “those are great questions” haha 

at the end of the interview, i asked for their business cards so i could email them and thank them for taking time to interview me. they thanked me and the HR person said she’d be in touch the next few days

after the interview, i messaged my friend who had helped send in my resume and she said “just between you and me, they came upstairs and i think they really like you” omggg i felt sooo happy haha

on the way home, i remember getting really lost LOL it took me almost like 3 hours to get home i think XD i ended up finding a small japanese store that i bought a bunch of stuff from ahaha

so... i waited the weekend..... it was monday.... and i didnt hear from them.... tuesday went by and i didnt hear anything, i thought i must not have gotten the job, but then wednesday again, i got an email from the HR person, asking if i could email her 2-3 references... which i had none... so i asked 2 of my old coworkers from different jobs and they replied right away too because they also knew i hated my current job ahah so i sent my references and then on thursday while i was at work... i got a call from the HR person saying “i called both of your refernces and they both said wonderful things about you so we would like to offer you the 3 month contract position” like OMGGGG i almost screamed of joy!!! i was jumping up and down outside the office haha XD 

i told this job that i would need 1 week to give my old job a heads up tho, so i could start on the following wednesday

but then i got scared again, i had to tell my current job i was quitting... i mustered up the courage and just told my one boss first, she was so happy for me, she gave me a hug and she wished me all the best too!! but then i had to tell the owner of the company and his wife, theyre both assholes so i didnt wanna tell them, but my 1 coworker helped me figure out how to tell them.... so i told them and they were unhappy but i told them id help for 1 last event (until the end of october) they appreciated that at least 

so that following tuesday was my last day being in office at that crappy job i hated!!! i literally left there SKIPPING with a HUGGGEEE grin on my face!! i would never have to go back to that horrible place again!!! omg i was soooo happy!!!!

im getting tired of writing all this now LOL so im gonna fast forward a bit, but the new job was amazing, people there loved me and they were so appreciative of me, it was a huge 360 turn!! 

i was working at this new place but then in the evenings id help at my old job by working from home, that was horrible, i couldnt deal.... after that last job at my old work was done, i told them i couldnt help out any more and theyd have to find a new designer.... after 6 years of working there.... 6 FRIKKEN YEARS!!!!!! i told them i was probably going to have my contract extended and i told her i was so excited and she messaged back saying “thats not good for us but anyway congrats” like WTF BITCH!!! I HELPED YOU OUT SO MUCH!! I WAS SO NICE TO YOU!!! GOOD FUCKING RIDDANCE!!! I CANT EVEN WITH YOU!! LIKE OMG!!! i told her id send her files that i worked on and she replied 2 days later that she’ll download them later my last message to her was just “k” i was SO FUCKING DONE!!!! I HATE HER SO MUCH!!!

ANYYYYYYYWAYYYSSSSSSS...... fast forward another few weeks?months? my manager told me that she was able to get me to job full time..... FULL FUCKING TIME........ this was my first EVER full time job that related to my career, the old crappy one was never full time.... this is the first one ive had thats full time and ill get benefits and vacation and everything!! like OH. MY. GOD. i left work SOOOOOO happy!!! i actually CRIEDDDDD tears of joy!!! i couldnt believe it!!! i cant believe it!!! like omg!!! they all congratulated me!!! they were so proud of me!!! i was proud of me!!! i told my parents and i think for the first time in mine and their life, THEY were proud of me!!!! like it was amazinnnnggg!!! its still amazing!!!! we had a work lunch party and my manager was like “id like to take this time to officially tell you all that Nabeela is now full time with us” and they all raised their glasses and cheered to that too!!! like OMGGGG I WAS SO HAPPY!! (also hella embarassed since im still awkward af!!) but SO SO HAPPY!!!!

HONESTLY GUYS...... i am 30 years old now..... 30........ its NEVER too late..... nothing in life is set in stone..... no matter how 1 person does things, doesnt mean you have to be like them too....you can always do things at your own pace!!! sometimes things dont go as you imagine them but things WILL AND DO get better!!! things will be alright in the end!!! thats how i ended my 2017 and started my life as a 30 year old obaa-chan XD 

theres a lot of goals and things id like to work on for 2018 but i hope 2018 will even better for me and all my friends, family and followers!!!

if any of you actually got through all of this, then im so sorry and also thank you so much for reading LOL to all my friends who supported me through this hard moment in my life, thank you very much!! 

if any of you are curious about my portfolio, you can check it out at www.nabeelahamid.com ^__________^ thankssss!!! if any of you guys are designers too, tips or positive criticism is always welcome too!!

to all of my friends and followers who are already in 2018, HAPPY NEW YEAR AND I WISH NOTHING BUT THE BEST FOR ALL OF YOU!!!!! and to those still in 2017 like me, lets bring in the new years together!!!

[lostdreamsandwishes]

Much Needed Rant

I’ve never done anything like vent online before, but my one best friend and I are in abit of a fight today. I don’t know what to say... i guess a quick “get to know me” would help to fully understand the story.  

First things first, I am very bad at finding the right the words when trying to express my feelings and thoughts so please bear with me (yes as a 20 something adult who grew up knowing english I am not eloquent at all).  

My best friend, A, is someone who i’ve been with for almost 5 years, he and I met online.  He is the first person I think of when I wake up and the last person I think of at night, he lives with his parents and so do i.  He and I are pretty similar and we have friends, but mainly just stick to the two of us.  We don’t text our friends often and are pretty bad at keeping up in people’s lives. I am currently in nursing school and he works at the same hospital I work at.  He is a security officer and is expected to do 16 hour shifts if someone from the next shift calls in.  Nursing school is very stressful and I am just about to finish my first semester.  

The other day I was at school trying to practice some nursing skills at the school practice lab since I had a skills validation the next day.  It was very stressful since the skills I needed to know were quite alot and were very detailed.  I always study with my nursing buddy, M, she and I practiced for a few hours and decided to go to the computer lab to work on other assignments.  

For the past few days A and I have been sick with a sinus infection, where it has affected us differently.  For A he is completely exhausted, congested, weak, and doesn’t have an appetite.  For me my left ear feels clogged, making it difficult to hear, congested, sore throat, and headaches at the most random times.  

A has been going to work sick and I have been going to school sick also. So as I was at school texting A, he finds out that he has to do an unscheduled 16 hour shift since someone from the night shift had called in (A works 3pm to 11pm typically).  This had made him frustrated and the little energy he had meant he needed to conserve until 7am, that is if his shift ran smoothly.   After finding out about the long shift I offered to bring him food. 

A few days ago my dryer at home broke, which meant I needed to take all of the laundry at home to the laundromat.  However due to a busy weekend I couldn’t do it til that day.  M and I were at school studying until 6:30 in the evening and we parted ways.  I rushed to the laundromat since I needed to get 2 large bins of clothes done and make time to study still.  Doing this, I completely forgot about my promise to A and had to tell him that I can no longer bring him food because of all of the things I needed to get done.  He was basically let down that I couldn’t bring him food, but ordered something before it got late.  We argued about me bringing him food, I felt like he was trying to make me feel bad for not doing that for him.  It wasn’t like he ever asked about how my day was going and the only thing we spoke about that day was about him.  I didn’t want to push him since I knew he was frustrated, but there was a point where I just snapped and was like “I’ve had a hard day too, stop making me feel bad about this.  I just want to go home and rest because I need to wake up early for school the next day.”  It seemed like it made him see my perspective since he dropped the topic and tried to make a joke about something else.

 After spending a few hours at the laundromat I went home and ended up crashing til 3am where I felt absolutely horrible.  I had a splitting headache and I knew that today was going to be a bad day.  I popped 2 ibuprofen and went back to sleep for another 2 hours.  I then got ready for school and arrived to school at 7:20 am.  The day was long day where I had trouble hearing from my left ear, had major stress from my skills validation and a presentation that I needed to give for my fundamentals class.  M and I ate a sandwich for lunch, she had tuna and I had chicken.  M then got a bad case of food poisoning and we went to another nursing buddy of ours’ house ,B.  I drove the three of us to B’s house in M’s car.  M was nauseous and ready to throw up any second.  The moment we arrived to B’s house, M was throwing up.  B and I took care of her unitl she decided to rest. 

 During the chaos, A was texting me asking me what I was doing and where I was.  I didn’t get the chance to reply quickly, but once I replied I told him I was at B’s house studying.  

This is where it begins...

A was then confused and said that I was being inconsiderate for not even calling him before he goes to work.  That hes tired from working 16 hours, only sleeping for a few hours and having to go to work at 3, that it would have been nice if he and I could have talked even if it was just for 5 minutes.  I explained to him that M was not feeling well and I assumed he would just understand and back off.  I was wrong. He and I began to argue, I explained what happened and said how I was helping M with B.  A then said that if B was helping her I didnt need to help and I should have studied or try to rest .  I didn’t understand why he was being like this.  M was the one person this semester who was the one I can rely on and helped me the most, so me helping her when she is sick is nothing.  Now here I am frustrated that he is the one being inconsiderate and is upset that I would help someone.  Its not like I dropped everything and decided to go have fun.  I still tried to study after everything that happened.  

I’m used to giving in and just apologize so that we don’t argue, but I felt really wronged this time and i didn’t want to take it lying down.  I got home around 5:30 pm and was trying to wind down from the day before getting back to study.  Eventually I fell asleep and woke up from a phone call from the hospital, it was A.  Groggy and disoriented I answered the call and once I gathered my bearings we spoke about what happened.  I guess I was hoping it was some sort of misunderstanding on one of our parts, but really he just wanted me to look out for myself and not worry for others.  i understand that, but M isn’t just anybody.  She was the person who helped me study for my exams, she is the only person I really meet up with outside of school and is someone I’ve been very close with in the past 4 months.  A and I argued over the phone to the point where we were both too stubborn to give in and we just ended the phone call.  Now its been hours since our argument and  I am still frustrated over what happened.  I wanted to get a few things off my chest and figured that since no one knows of my tumblr i could rant freely. Was I wrong? Did i misunderstand? Did he just misunderstand? Is he only acting like this from the lack of sleep + him being sick?  I am tired and on the verge of  a breakdown.  

[barry429484077-blog]

mature in latex - 10 Ways Xhamster Mature Lesbian Can Make You Invincible

Mark - Brianna and I were an unlikely match. I am white 63" and 205lbs. I could of been the poster child of a SoCal surfer dude. Blonde hair, blue eyes and no body fat to speak of. Brianna is Blasian (Black/Asian) 58" tall with a brickhouse body (38-24-38). She is stunningly beautiful with light brown skin and intoxicatingly exotic eyes. We attended the same college and definitely ran in different crowds. She was studious and I was there to party. I had a reputation on campus with the ladies....manwhore. I had the looks and sported a thick 8 1/2" cock. I noticed Brianna one day and set my sights on my next conquest. My ego took a major hit when she would not give me the time of day. I persisted over the next few days, causing her to snap at me. Brianna unleashed on me. How I objectified women and she would not be another notch on my bedpost. I tried to play it off, but deep down I knew she was right. I was an ass whole. After much soul searching, I decided to find her and apologize. I noticed her sitting alone out in the main courtyard. I nervously asked her if I could speak to her. She looked at me for a long minute and agreed. I asked her to accept my apology for being an ass. We sat and talked for a couple hours. I walked her back to her dorm. For the first time my thoughts werent to say anything to get in a girls pants. I asked if we could meet for lunch the next day and she accepted. We spent more time together over the next month. Unbelievably, she told me she was still a virgin in her junior year of college. I joked with her about hearing rumors she was a lesbian. She said, "What?!". After recovering from a rib punch. She told me her retired army sergeant dad was very strict with his only daughter. She wasnt allowed to have boyfriends and it carried over into college. I asked her to be my girl. She new I was sexually experienced. She told me she cared for me, but wasnt ready for sex. I knew she was giving me and out. I looked in her eyes and she was tearing up. Hugging her tightly, I told her I could wait as long as it took. We had some heavy make out sessions over the next couple of months. She gave me hand jobs and became infatuated with my 8 12" dick. She let me play with her big tits and pussy through her underwear. I am not going to lie I was getting very frustrated. Unexpectedly, Brianna initiated having sex the first time. She asked me to be patient and go slow. I made it about her. I kissed and sucked on her very hard nipples. I slowly removed her panties and took my time before licking her pussy. and came squeezing my head between her thighs. Entering her with my focus on pleasing her rather than just getting mine was new for me. Her eyes were glazed over as she gasped and moaned. We fucked slowly at first as she adjusted to my size. She had at least two orgasms before I came. I looked at her amazing body while she came down from her orgasm. I was in love with her and was happy about it. We finally met each others parents after dating for a year and a half at our graduation. Her dad shook my hand clearly letting me know it wouldnt go well if I hurt his little girl. He was a big guy about my height but broader in the shoulders. Her mom was Thai very beautiful and petite. I am the spitting image of my dad. My mom was tall at 510" with long slender legs and amazing blue eyes. I surprised everyone (except my dad he helped me buy the ring) including Brianna at dinner. I got on bent knee and proposed. The look her dad gave me made me pause for just a second. Her dad Ray cut me some slack when he found out I was getting commissioned in the Army. They were an Army family. Brianas two older brothers were already enlisted. Ray pulled me aside and verbalized what I had been picking up on with his looks. He said, "treat her right and you and I will get along." I knew he meant every word. I left for training that summer. Receiving my first assignment after completing the training. We were going to Germany! Brianna and I were married and off we went to start our life together. The first year was all about us. We lived in a small house about ten miles from the base. I loved being a platoon leader. Brianna was doing some part time teaching at the base school. Our home life was great. We studied German together and traveled when we could. We were having sex frequently and over time Brianna was my best sex partner ever. Brianna was so humble she really didnt realize how good looking she was. Her humility was one of the things I loved about her. She could have been so vain looking the way she did. Army officers and their wives were required to attend socials. We were often the youngest couple at these events. I would have to take a lot of crap from higher ranking officers mostly in jest. Brianna regularly turned heads and was always the center of attention. I would often overhear comments made about her body, ass or full lips. My first reaction was to get angry. Over time this anger eventually turned to pride and then fantasies. Before I met Brianna I experienced a few threesomes. Buddies and I would share a girls. I even had sex with two bi-sexual girls once. The attention Brianna was getting combined with my past experiences fueled some pretty hot fantasies. My current platoon sergeant transferred out. His replacement was a muscular Peurto Rican. Louis was in his late thirties and came across hard. He was 511" and 220lbs of muscle, tattoos and scars. The prominent scar on his left cheek was a nice accessary. He later told me he got it in a street fight before he joined the army. His mom made him join the army because it was safer than his neighborhood. I couldnt match Louis in hand-to-hand combat. But I was more than a match running and swimming. We had a very competitive relationship. He was my subordinate, but we became more like brothers over time. We would grab a few beers after work every day. I learned he was divorced with two kids he missed very much. He blamed himself because he couldnt keep his dick in his pants. One day, he looked at me over his beer and said, "How did a geek like you land a babe like your wife... sir?" I responded, "with good looks and a big dick." He replied, "I thought officers were always honest?". We laughed it off but all the while I was thinking, holy shit Louis has the hots for my wife. On the drive home all I could think about was Brianna having sex with Louis. Brianna and other significant others would regularly watch us play softball. Brianna though Louis was very intimidating. This one particular softball game Brianna sat with some of the single girls. She overheard gossip about Louis and his sexual prowess. During dinner, Brianna cleared her throat and said she overheard some of the enlisted girls talking about Louis. By this time she was blushing and couldnt make eye contact. I was all ears at this point. Louis was making a name for himself with the ladies. I laughed and said well he is single and spends half his life in the gym. I said, "I thought guys like that were jerks.". She replied, "they are!". She changed the subject to her day teaching. I tried to listen to her , but my mind drifted to her and Louis. We were having sex that night and she was very excited. I again fantasized about Louis fucking her. I was fucking her from behind. Her big hard ass was slamming back against me. I blurted out, "imagine its Louis fucking you." She moaned slamming back even harder. I looked in the mirror, the look of lust on her face was intense. I got bolder and asked her, "if she wanted to fuck him." She didnt answer, moaning louder. I asked again, her head lowered to the mattress and she screamed, "yaaaaaas!" She experienced the most intense orgasm ever. It was too much for me and I blasted in her pussy. We lay there catching our breaths in total silence. She finally cuddled up next to me. She guiltily told me I was the only man she wanted or needed. I didnt push the topic. However, I drifted off to sleep thinking about Louis fucking Brianna. The next weekend we had a two-day softball tournament. I sprained my ankle during the last mature sleeping sex game of the day. An medic iced it down and gave me some crutches. Brianna had been drinking so I asked Louis to drive us home. She was pretty chatty on the way home. I dont know if it was the booze or her nerves being around Louis. I was thinking about my plan. I took a shower leaving them alone. When I came out I caught Louis looking at her ass while she made us something to eat. He quickly looked away, grabbing me a beer from the cooler. Brianna brought us food, excusing herself to go take a shower. Louis .was looking through our movie collection. I told him to pick one out. He selected "9 1/2 Weeks", a favorite of mine. He asked, "if it was a bad choice?". I gave him our hand signal for negative. Brianna came out looking refreshed wearing one of my t-shirts. Her big tits and ass were still pretty obvious. I noticed she put on makeup as well. She joined me on the couch and I passed her a beer. It took her a minute to realize what we were watching. When she did she gave me "the look". During the movie we were all quiet. Brianna would sneak glances over at Louis and turn back to the movie. After the movie ended I asked Brianna to get Louis a towel and some clean clothes. She looked at me like I was crazy. She returned with a towel and clothes. Louis was barely out of the room and Brianna asked, "What the hell are you thinking?" I calmly looked at her and said, "I cant drive him back and hes been drinking. Are you willing to drive him back?" She punched me in the ribs knowing the answer. I took a deep breath and told Brianna I wanted us to live out a fantasy. She looked confused and then said, "are your fricking crazy?" I replied, "maybe I am, I cant get it out of my mind". She said, "I dont think I could do anything and definitely not in front of my husband." Louis came out at that moment wearing shorts and a tank top. We both had seen his arm and calf tattoos before. Now you could partially see his back tattoo. I asked him to show us and he pulled mature women in bathing suits up the back of his shirt. Brianna said, "Oh my gosh!" I am not sure it was the beautiful mosaic tattoo that covered most of his back. Or his washboard abs and large pectorals. Brianna said she always wanted a tattoo but her dad would kill her. Louis looked at her and said, "Youre not your daddys little girl anymore." A look past between them that emboldened me. I thought to myself no guts no glory. Brianna was acting nervous. I took a deep breath and said, "Louis I want you and Brianna to have sex.". Louis stopped in mid drink. Brianna just looked down at the floor. I asked Louis, "do you want to have sex with Brianna?". Louis responded, "She is very beautiful." I said, "that wasnt my question." He looked at Brianna and said, "yes." Briannas head snpped up looking straight at Louis. I asked Brianna the same question. She replied, "yes". Brianna turned to me saying she was to nervous to do anything in front of me. I told her I would stay on the couch. I wanted her to do this. She sat back and thought for a minute. Brianna asked, "Are you sure?". I kissed her and whispered yes in her ear. She got up and walked over to Louis holding out her hand. I could see he nipples stiffening though her shirt. She led him into our bedroom. The last thing I saw before the door closed was her lifting the shirt over her head. I laid there for what seemed like an eternity. I thought she was going to change her mind and burst out of the bedroom. Then I heard her start to moan and gasp. My dick was instantly got hard , it was really happening! She let out a long gasp saying, "Please go slow.". The bed was making a slow rhythmic squeaking sound as her moans grew louder. I could tell she was trying to be quiet when she started blowing her air out instead of moaning. Louis started really laying the pipe. Between the bed springs and Briannas moaning it sounded like a rock concert. She was crying out, "Fuck me!", "God your dick feels so good!". She came screaming, "Yes! Cum in my pussy!" I cleaned my own cum up using my shirt. Laying there replaying the whole thing over in my mind. I dont know how much time passed. Brianna began moaning again. The bed was squeaking like crazy. They fucked for a while ending with Brianna cumming again very vocally. For more info in regards to pictures of milfs fucking review our own web-site. I finally drifted off to sleep waking up to the smell of bacon cooking. Brianna came out looking freshly showered. She couldnt make eye contact with me. She started picking up and tossed Louis uniform in the wash. I grabbed her as she walked past me and pulled her to my lap. I told her I loved her and I was ok with what happened if she was. Her eyes watered up and she kissed me. I knew she was experiencing some inner turmoil. But we would work through it together Louis handed her a plate and she went at it hungrily. I said, "looks like you worked up a serious appetite.". We all busted up laughing and that seemed to drain the tension out of the air. The next few days were surreal. We had only been married two years and I let another man fuck my wife! I couldnt believe how much I was turned on by what happened. Brianna was still clearly confused about her feelings about what happened. She was married and it was wrong. She felt guilty because she enjoyed the sex. What would her dad say! We talked for hours about what happened. We came to a mutual conclusion we wanted it to happen again. She wanted to include me but still wasnt comfortable enough. I told her I could wait. I cornered Louis who had been trying to avoid me. Hard to do when we sit in the same office. We went for a beer after work. I told him everything was fine. Brianna was ok and said she enjoyed it. I mentioned she and I would be at the club Friday night. Brianna - I was raised in a strict conservative home. Dating Mark was a big step for me. When we eventually had sex I was hooked. Mark was patient and a good teacher and I fell deeply in love with him. When he proposed to me it was the happiest day in my life. The fact my dad didnt shoot him was the second happiest day of my life. I was determined to be the best wife in all the history of wifedom. It was a fairy tale I moving to foreign country with my prince charming. I enjoyed being on Marks arm at his socials knowing many of the other women envied me. I was always confident about my looks but never thought of myself as gorgeous. Mark started telling me about some of the off hand comments made by the other soldiers about me. I just told him it was the testosterone talking. I didnt mention it was very flattering. When I heard some other women talking about Louis, whom I thought was intimidating. I was shocked initially. Then embarrassed about what they were saying. I had to admit he was sexy milf in that bad boy kind of way. I dont know why I just didnt keep it to myself. I mentioned the conversation about Louis to Mark. He jokingly laughed it off and I felt embarrassed about bringing it up. Angry at myself for the thoughts I was having. That night Mark was really getting it in. He repeatedly brought up Louis. I did imagine it was Louis pounding my pussy. I had a toe curling orgasm. Afterwards, I panicked and told him it could never happen for real and that he was my one and only. When Mark asked Louis to drive us home after he sprained his ankle. My first though was, why not one of the other guys?. On the drive home my mind was all over the place. Was I making more out of this than what was really there? I was to nervous to sit alone with Louis while Mark showered. I went into the kitchen to make dinner. I felt like I was being watched. It was probably my booze amplified imagination. I went and took a shower trying to clear my head. I composed myself and went back out to the living room. The next thing I know I am watching soft porn! I made a mental note to give Mark hell later. I couldnt help looking at Louis during the movie wondering what he was thinking. The movie ended and Mark asked me to get Louis a towel and clean clothes. I thought, "what the hell!. While Louis was gone Mark brings up his fantasy again. I started to freaking out. For some crazy reason I thought about what my dad would say! I told Mark I couldnt do it and definitely not with him in the same room. Before I could choke Mark. Louis came out from the other room. It was hard not to look at his body. He had an amazing body covered in beautiful tattoos. When I saw his back tattoo I started feeling tingly all over. Still thinking no way in hell could I do anything.....maybe. Now I was super nervous and my mind was going from the gutter back to my dad losing his mind. Then Mark turns the world upside down. When he asked Louis if he wanted to have sex with me and his answer was yes. My first thought was, "he wants me!". The I thought, "Oh me GOD, I cant!". When I looked at Louis and saw he was serious. My nipples started getting hard and my pussy wet. There was no doubt in my mind I wanted him at that moment. I told Mark I was too nervous. When he told me he would stay in the living room. I knew I was losing this battle. I took a deep breath and decided to go for it before I changed my mind. I led Louis into our bedroom not looking back. If I looked back I would have chickened out. I walked in removed my shirt staring straight ahead. When I heard the door close I considered running back out. Louis pressed against me and cupped my breast testing their weight. He started kissing my neck and I tensed up. He asked me if I wanted him to stop. I answered, "No.". I felt his hard dick against me as he tweaked my very hard nipples. He removed my panties and turned me to face him. I let my hand trace down his chest over his ripped stomach to his cock. Marks cock is longer but not as thick. I couldnt come close to wrapping my hand around him. Louis led me onto the bed where we kissed and he went down on me. I had to push him away because I was about to cum. I was trying to be quiet. He kissed his way up and sucked on my rock hard nipples. I was getting so hot and when he started rubbing his big dick up and down my pussy. I hissed, put it in!. When he started I had second thoughts the pressure was crazy. I asked him to go slow. I think I started a slow long orgasm before he took his first stroke. He started fucking me in earnest and I dont know how many times I came. His dick seemed to be hitting every nerve ending in my pussy at the same time. He started breathing heavily. He asked me where he should cum. I remember screaming, "in my pussy!" We laid there in the afterglow. I started thinking about Mark. I couldnt believe how quickly I forgot about Mark being in the next room. Louis fucked me senseless and I loved it. How could I forget about him? I wanted to go out to him but was unsure of how he would react to me enjoying it so much. I ended up falling asleep. Louis woke me sucking my nipples and rubbing my pussy. He pulled me on top and I reached between us and guided him inside me. I still had to work him in slowly, but it felt so good. I rode him as he played with my tits and ass for quite a while. I was so into turned on I know I was getting loud. I squatted over him and bounced up and down as hard and fast as I could. Louis flipped my on my back and pounded my pussy. I had my hands on his ass pulling into me. I came with my face buried in his shoulder. He came shortly after me, filling me up for the second time that night. He collapsed on top of me with his big chest smashed against my big tits. I no longer was nervous and I knew my life had changed forever. I woke up to an empty bed and breakfast cooking. I went into the bathroom. Looking in the mirror I looked a mess. My hair looked like Medusa, bite marks on my breast and my lipstick smeared making all over my face. Al around my mouth my skin was red from whisker burns. I took a shower and went to face the music. Mark was eating and very talkative. I was to nervous to look at him. Then he pulls me onto his lap and tells me everything is ok. I was so scared he would regret what happened and be mad that I clearly enjoyed myself. I looked at Louis and knew I wanted to fuck him again. Not at the risk of losing Mark though. I was so confused. I fretted about it for a couple days and then Mark and I talked. He finally convinced me we were ok and he wanted to do it again. The next day Mark said we were going out dancing Friday night. Dancing is something I love to do. I also wondered if Louis would be there. I was both nervous and excited. But what would my daddy say! /u/HomeFlipper1970

[chunmakowski3-blog]

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About a week ago I received a relatively innocent Snapchat photo from a girl Id long given up any of hope of ever hearing from again... mostly because theres about 8,000 miles separating us. Ill call her Cèleste for our purposes today. We had a short "How are you" conversation as prior lovers are prone to do and the reminiscing on her has lead me to resolve to contribute to this sub instead of just lurking today. Ill be including some buildup as frankly its inseparably woven into the fabric of my memory of this night but Ill include a break down below for you to skip to if the sexy is what you seek. Additionally there may be some moral choices present that you may or may not agree with.. thats your prerogative. The Friday night we met was a pretty normal fall Southern California evening. I had worked the day shift at the bar where I was employed and got off around 6pm after helping with the happy hour rush. I came home to an empty house. My wife at the time had gone down to LA from the small college town where we lived with a couple of friends and our housemate to a concert/celebrate a birthday but unfortunately I wasnt able to get off work the full weekend so I was left behind.. which was fine with me anyway, the band wasnt my thing and I dont care for clubbing which was mostly their whole weekend plus my wife and I hadnt really been getting along for the better part of four months anyway so I figured some time to decompress and be alone would be nice. I hit downtown about an later and found a spot at the bar of a place Id walked past a few times but never gone inside. It had an eclectic vibe split between people watching playoff baseball and dancing to the loud house music pumping so I figured Id hang around. She came in with her friend about thirty minutes later. She was maybe 53" in her dark converse sneakers. She cut a great figure (I had no idea) in a gray T-shirt with French writing and dark jeans.. But I think it was the black leather jacket that really oozed confidence and raw sensual mystique. When she sat at the bar I had a flashback to college: that first day of class when everyones picking seats and a cute girl walks in, surveys the room and winds up picking the seat next to you. I wasnt even single or looking for a girl to pick up and it still had me flustered a bit.. but once they had their drinks and started chatting with each other the feeling passed and it was back to baseball. Or at least so I thought.. shortly after returning from a cigarette break her friend began talking with a young man and Cèlestes attention wandered. I cant remember who started the conversation (likely her), but Ill never forget the feeling of being entranced staring into her gorgeous bright green eyes while she repeatedly pondered how anyone could enjoy "bays-bowl". I answered her sarcastic jabs with a bit of sass and it piqued her interest enough to skip the next smoke break. The connection was almost instant. We ordered a couple more rounds and talked about cultural differences, history, languages and education. When shed first come in Id guessed she was an exchange student at the local University, perhaps 19 or 20 using a fake ID but in fact she was 23 and freshly graduated. She and her friend were taking a three month long tour of California before taking jobs back home. The conversation inexorably turned to our love lives and after telling me she was single and not looking to settle down any time soon she asked about me. Drunk with infatuation (and maybe a couple of whiskey shots) I replied that I too was single and just working in town because.. hey, its a college beach town. This is a time to mention that this only worked because I didnt have a wedding ring on. My wife and I had decided to forego rings in favor of matching tattoos.(We were HS sweethearts. Young and dumb, I know.) Eventually Cèleste wants to go somewhere else as she and Nathalie were only in town until tomorrow. Nathalies beau had ditched her so they ask me to lead them somewhere new and fun. We take off as Nathalie closes her bill but as were walking down the street Cèleste starts feeling not so good.. I lead her down a side street and into an alley where she proceeds to... Yeah. I hold her hair until shes done, then flag Nathalie down and offer to call them a cab but for whatever reason Cèleste decides she wants to stay out. She drinks water at the next bar while sobering up as Nathalie flirts until last call and then we head to the beach. The three of us sit on the sand listening to the waves and share a spliff while we look at the stars and talk until about 4am. It was so serene and the mental stimulation/connection I felt with her during that chat will forever stay in my memory. Cèleste is much more sober than Nathalie as this point and starts talking about getting an Uber for their 45 minute trip home. In my infatuated stupor I offer my house as an alternative. Now, wary reader, before you assume my awful intentions I wasnt thinking with my little head. Id ruled anything like that out the second those drinks had come back up for a visit. I explained how my roommates were out of town and that theres a spare bed they could have. Cèleste hugged and thanked me and they agreed so we caught an Uber home. Cèleste was very cuddly on the drive, thanking me for being such a gentleman after her episode while Nathalie was basically about to pass out. We got in the house and I showed them their room/bathroom and said goodnight. I heard the shower turn on as I changed out of my clothes, turned off the lights and closed my eyes listening to the water falling and thinking about my strained marriage and exciting it was feeling a romantic connection with someone for the first time in a long time. The next thing I remember is being jolted awake at the feeling of the bed moving and waking up to see the outline of a curvy nude body and those gorgeous green eyes crawling towards me in the darkness on hands and knees. I could see the outline of a smile creep across her face and her arm lightly grazed mine. My brain started a fight between the alarm of "What are you doing!?!" and "Wow..." Id had group experiences with my wife before but never gone behind her back like this. The reservations began building in my stomach, but those eyes drank away all of my hesitations. Id been staring at them all night, mesmerized, and when her arm grazed mine the warmth of her skin was enough to send me over the edge of hesitation. I reached my hand up and cupped the side of her face, bringing her closer to me. She inched forward until I felt the tip of her erect nipple on my chest. Her breathing quickened as I smiled back. She whispered "I wanted to brush my teeth before I did this" in that sultry accent and leaned in for a soft but passionate kiss. I returned it as my hands began exploring her body. My right hand came off her face and immediately went to her round full ass. It was so soft, round and full. Id been staring at it all night and determined the jeans shed worn had done her ass plenty of justice. She moaned lightly into my mouth as I gripped her cheek and pulled her body down on top of me. I knew she could feel me starting to swell against her thigh and she broke our kiss, lifting her head up to grin. "Quest-ce que cest?" She cooed, reaching her down my stomach and under the lining for my boxers. She ground her thigh gently against me as her small hands wrapped around the head of my rapidly rising penis. I grunted quietly and began softly kissing her neck and upper chest, nuzzling my way towards her breasts still keeping a firm grip of her ass as her petite fingers worked their way as around my tip and down the length of my shaft as best the could. She leaned back indicating she wanted up so I let her get to her knees. The moonlight coming through the window illuminated her frame as she worked to try to get my boxers off and I could finally clearly see her chest. I was pleasantly surprised to see that even only being 53" she was blessed with very full Cs that were extremely perky.. I heard a gasp as she finally released me from my boxers and apparently discovered that I was equipped above her expectations. She leaned down presumably to inspect closer but the next thing I knew I felt a warm, wet, enveloping sensation as she pressed her tongue flat and firm against the bottom of my cock and slowly dragged it up the entire length. She was on her knees now just to my side closely inspecing the tip of my dick with her tongue when she again dragged her tongue up my length. I groaned loudly and then inhaled sharply as a primal lust began building in me. Reaching out my hand I slapped her ass hard, triggering a moan from her. She remarked about my size, mumbling about how Im the biggest shes tried to blow as she continued taking a mouthful of my now rock solid dick. I groaned in reply and slapped her ass again as she started to circle the outline of my tip with her tongue. I told her to stop teasing me and take it already, which she enthusiastically did. My fingertips traced her lower back as she lowered her mouth in small increments before pulling back and repeating. I made my way to the outline of her pussy to find she was soaking wet and easily slipped a finger inside of her. My lust grew with every sloppy slurp of her swallowing me and every moan of pleasure from feeling my fingertips teasing her swollen pussy lips before disappearing inside her. Finally I couldnt sit idly by anymore. I picked her head up off me and pushed her head down to the mattress. Her as looked amazing sticking up into the air as I got to my knees, kneeled beside her and buried my fingers into her pussy to the knuckle. She gripped the sheets as I watched her face contort and her mouth go agape. I began thrusting my fingers into her, giving myself a break from stimulation as I teased her gspot with my fingertips and smasked her ass with my free hand. In case you loved this article as well as you would like to get details regarding mature smoking video i implore you to check out the website. She moaned repeatedly rocked her hips back to meet my fingers and with her rhythm building I could tell she was close. Listening to her groans made me feel so powerful and animalstic. I asked her repeatedly "You like that? Huh?" uncaring about her milfs friends response though it was always yes. I told her how sexy she looked as I held the back of her neck and finger fucked her wet pussy. I took my left hand and reached under her, first squeezing her nipple before letting my hand slide down her stomach to her clit. I barely applied any stimulation before she gripped my calf with her arm and let out a loud "Yessssss!!" as I moved my hand in a circle across her clit while continuing to thrust into her with my fingers. I got a small cut actually from where her fingernails dug into my leg as her orgasm hit a crescendo and she bucked backwards onto my fingers one last time before collapsing. We smiled and laughed as she recovered. During the down time I lost my erection which she promptly massaged back to life. The lust to take her quickly returned and I rolled her onto her back, taking her legs in my hand as she guided my girth between her legs and inside her. Her pussy felt so warm and wet, it squeezed every inch as I made my way inside. She moaned with every small thrust until my whole length was soaking wet. I put her legs over my shoulders and grabbed her hips as I began long stroking in and out. The combination of hearing her moans of pure pleasure and the movement of her hips as she rocked back onto me as I filled her up, her pussy clenching and squeezing every inch of my to try and milk my seed into her was unlike anything Ive ever felt. I grunted loudly as we picked up the pace and found a rhythm together. I was entranced by the sight of her full, pert breasts bouncing and swaying with every thrust and zoned out slightly.. unable process the overwhelming amount of positive stimulation and forgot everything except my primal need to fuck this beautiful creature beneath me and fill her with my seed. I barely even noticed her second orgasm until she started tapping my shoulder, signaling me to slow down. I hadnt cum yet but we were both tired and out of breath so she told me to fuck her again and not stop until I cum. I leaned in the kiss her and slowly started gyrating my hips inside her as I did. She groaned lightly, grabbed my ass and pulled me even deeper into her as we built a new rhythm. Eventually it became too much and I felt that familiar feeling building within me. I began to speed up and let my strokes build longer. I told her I was going to cum soon and her response was an airy "Très bien". I felt her begin to contract the walls of her pussy after I said that milking every inch of me to coax my cum out. I asked her where to cum and she replied "anywhere". It took every ounce of discipline in my sexy mature big ass body not to continue pumping and fill her up but I held back, pulling out and releasing my load all over her chest. Her tits were completely covered as she leaned up and stuck out her tongue to clean up what was left on my dick. After we cleaned up she cuddled up next to me, I wrapped my arm around her and we fell asleep. In the morning, once the whiskey wore off, I started to feel then pangs of guilt realizing the gravity of what Id just done but that was temporarily alleviated as Cèleste woke up and we proceeded to have sex again. Her body was just as beautiful in the morning light. We kissed goodbye as she and Nathalie got in the Uber to go back to their hotel, then kissed again after I had to meet her about 2 hours later after she noticed shed left her leather jacket at my place. It was a different kiss, that second one... Ill always remember that too. /u/sexytimethrownow

[ves-abs-roq-pas-blog]

The Last Four Months

Hi Ves!

Wow it’s been a long time since i’ve used that greeting! I just wanted to catch you up on the happenings and problems these past few months lol.

Back in June all the way until August, I was really happy here. I was still excited and I truly enjoyed moving here and the time I spent in Texas so far. It wasn’t until the end of August/early September when things started to get bad. It was when school started.

So i guess I have to take this back all the way to last February when I first decided to move. I was never actually sure of my decision-if it was the right one or not. I decided so quickly without really thinking much. The thing I never told anyone is that I kind of decided to move to run away from Jersey. I don’t know if you remember about this, but a while ago, around the same time I decided on Texas, I dropped my biophysics class and was really upset about it. Well, I guess that was one thing I ran away from. I was thinking about how it was so hard to face everyone after giving up like that. That class was also a requirement to graduate with a physics degree at Rutgers, and I wasn’t sure I had the strength to face going back into that class again. I hated failing and instead of getting back up and trying again, I kind of just ran away. Around that time was also the time I started skipping out on going to MBC and going to different churches while lying to everyone saying I didn’t come home for the weekend. I really was not enjoying church and I wanted to switch churches really badly at that time but I kept thinking about how awkward it would be to move churches while still being in the same town as everyone. And praise and worship made me feel so fake. I wasn’t enjoying what I was doing and wasn’t in the right spirit and I was supposed to lead the congregation into worship when all I could think about was if I was playing the right chord and what Mel could possibly correct me on this time. And then I thought of how i switched my major to Physics and if that was the right decision. I let so many people (push, his friends, and my professor) sway my decision to switch, but I didn’t know if it was what I really wanted. So instead of staying and fixing all these problems, I was like “okay i’ll move to Texas, start new, and forget all these problems”

And for a while it was great, but when school started, I absolutely hated it. My friends from Rutgers were texting on our group chat about where to get lunch and I was really upset that I couldn’t be there with them anymore. And I hated all my classes. I missed my physics classes and my classmates and professors at Rutgers. I still to this day love Rutgers more than my school now and that’s my biggest regret was leaving behind that school. I was so unhappy with my school that it was so hard to focus on any of my schoolwork (plus i was working and i was running out of time ot devote to studying). I ended up failing my first exam. And by failing, i mean legit failing, I got a 62 on it, the worst grade I’ve gotten in college. I was freaking out about everything. I began freaking out about my future too because I was so unhappy at this school, but I was stuck here until graduation because it’s affordable, and they had a program where I could get my engineering degree here instead of transferring to a university. It made me really upset, especially when Cookie and I went to visit University of Houston. I fell in love with the school and Josh, Cookie, Dane (another friend we have here who already goes to that school), and I wanted to go to U of H all together and experience university and I was too scared to tell them that I don’t think I’d be a part of that. Community college sucks lol.

I wasn’t making any friends, I was doing so bad in school, and I wasn’t getting any opportunities here. One of my biggest “what if’s” was not taking the research position I was offered because I moved here. I was so scared that I would never get that opportunity again, and I think I proved myself right because I can’t land anything here.

Then it was time to get an apartment and move out of their house. Tita Donna was asking my mom when we were going to move out and it was really embarrassing because we really were trying, but it was so hard to find one that was in a safe area and I really started my bad anxiety during those 3 weeks. No matter what we did, we really couldn’t find an apartment. There was one that we got approved to and it was in such a sketchy place I couldn’t even sleep at night thinking of how I was going to live in that place. My brother works until 10 or 11 every night and I had no idea how I could be on my own in that scary neighborhood. It got to a point where everytime I thought about it, I would just start crying (even in class) because I was so scared. I really never felt fear that bad in my life. I didn’t want to stay in their house any longer because that was just rude, but I didn’t want to live in a place with crime and gangs, especially when it was an hour away from Josh’s house in case of emergency. All that plus school plus work and i just couldn’t breathe. Sometimes I couldn’t even get myself to go to class because my anxiety was so bad I didn’t even want to get out of bed and face the day. That only put me in a worse situation because it made me more behind on my schoolwork. And as all this was going on, I was trying to hide it from my parents because I didnt want them worrying about me because there was a lot going on with them at home (which also added to my issues but i wont go further into that bc thats my parent’s personal stuff lol).

I started feeling like I really made the wrong decision. I was panicking that I did the wrong thing and messed up God’s plan for me. I was freaking out and didnt know what to do and just wanted to start over and try again.I was seriously thinking about dropping all my classes and flying home without even telling my parents. I wanted to go home and take a break to think about what I was supposed to do next. Maybe go back to Rutgers and try again.

My mom called me one day and I couldnt hold it anymore and I just started crying and told her everything and asked to come home. She didn’t know what to do either lol. She didn’t want me to give up and come home. She and my dad told me that they were doubting it too and wanted me to come home but told me to just be strong and that they believed I could get through it. They were saying that doubt was holding me back from the blessings God has for me. They said that moving would be really hard but worth it because if i stayed behind in jersey, I’d be stuck and never learn how to trust God, take chances, and unlock all the blessings behind the door.

I was telling my mom about how I felt really guilty that they were paying my tuition and I was failing and how I might have to graduate late and all that. And I was scared of my mom getting mad at me because me graduating late was never an option. Last year, I was on track to graduate early and I’ve always been on that end of the spectrum, overachieving and all that and I was scared to tell her that it changed. They were okay with it though, they said that sometimes some circumstances are uncontrollable and if i cant graduate in time because of moving schools, it’s okay. It’s not the worst thing in the world and life goes on. They told me I could transfer to U of H after finishing my prereqs if school really makes me that unhappy. They said that it doesn’t matter how long it takes me, as long as I make my hard work and theirs worthwhile. We also found a really nice apartment near here (one finally approved our application thank God). And I’m doing a lot better now. It’s just sometimes I still get random panic attacks and feel kind of just frozen and don’t know what to do even if theres no reason behind it. Everything could be going just fine, but I still feel uneasy and anxious and I hate that.

I start my new job tomorrow and I’m trying to stay calm about it but it’s kind of making me anxious because it’s another new place with new people and what if I suck at it? I just can’t stop overthinking everything and thinking of the worst possible things that can happen in any situation. But I know it’s just my mind playing with me, everything is okay, it’s just hard to remember that sometimes.

Thanks for listening

Love, Abs

[caredogstips]

Why are deadly extreme athletics most popular than ever?

Five parties died in the French Alps last weekend in boasting occurrences from paragliding to wingsuit hovering. What pushes people to test the eventual limits of their own security?

Darios ready, adds Dario Zanon. Three, two, one, remarks Graham Dickinson. Vive la France! they both wail as they leap from the summit of Le Brvent in the French Alps and spread their offstages to begin the Rock Star Line, one of the most hazardous routes in one of “the worlds” most dangerous sports.

Zanon and Dickinson are members of best available, however. Utilizing the flappings of cloth that connect their limbs and legs, they skip expertly past cliff margins and between trees at more than 110 mph. After less than a instant they liberate their parachutes and stray down, whooping, over Chamonix. A daytime after Zanons footage of the flight was posted last September, it had been watched a million times. Since then, it has been watched at least 10 million more.

On Wednesday 8 June this year, Zanon returned to Chamonix and climbed the Aiguille du Midi on the other side of the hollow for a solo flight. On the Sunday his figure was found on the glaciers 5,000 ft below. Most likely no one will ever know is which small-minded occasion went wrong. Small things become large-hearted instantly at 110 mph. He was 33.

Dario Zanon flying the Rock Star Line in September last year. He died in France in June.

It does happen to the best. Mark Sutton, “the mens” who parachuted into the London Olympics stadium garmented as James Bond, was killed wingsuit hovering in the Swiss Alps in 2013, while filming for EpicTV. In May 2015, Dean Potter, a famous US climber and wingsuit flyer, expired with his friend Graham Hunt. They had rushed from Taft Point in Yosemite Park, California. In July last year, the record-holding Colombian wingsuit flyer Jhonathan the Birdman Florez died during rehearse in Switzerland. The Briton David Reader succumbed two weekends ago. Last weekend five people croaked in separate incidents in the French Alps: two climbers, a paraglider, a hang-glider and a wingsuit flyer. Wednesday introduced two more, in separate accidents: an as yet unidentified British “mens and” Uli Emanuele, Zanons former piloting partner. Be a Hero, answers the video they obligated for specific actions camera company GoPro in March.

It is hard to find exact fleshes on the notoriety of extreme sports, but it is even harder to find anyone who is of the view that they arent smash. In 2006, the British Parachute Association entered 39,100 first jump-starts. Last time there were 59,679. Counts of full members regular skydivers have been rising at a same pace. The British Mountaineering Council had about 25,000 individual members in 2000. Last September there were almost 55,000. The number of people clambering Everest has rocketed since the 1990 s. The balance of status of women climbers is increasing too, up from about 16% in 2002( BMC illustrations) to 36% now( Sport England figures ). Hang-gliding figures have suffered since the 1990 s, according to Michelle Lanman at the British Hang Gliding and Paragliding Association( The kit is so much heavier ). But paragliding and paramotoring( paragliding with a monstrous love) are doing very nicely. SurfingGB also reports that British surfing continues to grow rapidly.

Uli Emanueles video for GoPro. He croaked this week.

You precisely get into it and then progressively build up, be developed further mentions Jess Cox, 27, an instructor at her leaders business, Fly Sussex Paragliding, near Lewes. Better flights involve get higher, further, doing debagging or acrobatic material. Sorry, debagging? She indicates me a video on her phone. It was recorded by a pal shortly after they had both hopped off a 7,000 ft mountain in Turkey. Cox is moving high-pitched above a sparkle body of water when suddenly she falls from her harness, surely to her fatality, until a brand-new paraglider unfurls out of her knapsack and she swoops away. Woo-hoo! she squeals, watching. I adore it! That was one of the best days of my life. Its exactly the most exciting circumstance Ive ever done. The high-pitched lasts for daytimes. Youre walking around on a cloud when you have a great flight. You actually experience what you do. You really cherish it

Of course, the drawback of detecting something you adore this much is having to do without it sometimes. You cant make the crack be too long or you get itchy feet, Cox says. Some people become wholly haunted, retire their jobs, live in a van and only circulate round the world with textile in the back, leaping off material. It does kind of devour you. Its entirely addictive. When possible, Cox actually flies to work in the morning with her paramotor. Shes never fright, she says, unless you weigh nerves before rivals. Nor should she be. Like more extreme athletics these days, paragliding is much safer than it appears, as long as its done properly.

Jhonathan Florez, seen here contesting in the Wingsuit World Championships in China in 2013, died during tradition in Switzerland last month. Picture: Long Hongtao/ REX/ Shutterstock

For others, theres no denying that danger is part of the entertainment. On his website, Dickinson says that when unpredictable episodes happen( birds, dead tree branches, etc) I feel like I am operating in pure survival mode. I can feel my heart rate speed up, my appreciations increase, and my focus narrow so that everything seems to nearly slow down. During these instants I try to only focus on the current, the immediate here and now. I think this integrity of thoughts and thought is one of the many reasons I continue to do what I do. Being able to escape the interference, clutter and business of daily life is a rare treat in this world.

Its the luminous beginning of a red-hot daytime and Tim Cox meets the amateur paragliders and explains what they are going to do. I weigh 16 men as well as four girls. Mark, 28, and Andrew, 39, are both musicians at Glyndebourne. We had this day off and I concluded, Lets go and do something stupid, Andrew pronounces. Hes done a skydive once before and it panicked him. I only recollect contemplation, Deem it together, nurse it together, prop it together. I was hopeless to be on the ground. Hes hoping this will be a bit calmer. Mark, on the other handwriting, is a struggle director and well up for it. Hes done a bit of kite-surfing, diving and caving, but has still not been anything up high. I think its just for people who dont do very well at a barbecue, he reads. So many of our colleagues are happy to sit with a bottle of prosecco in the sunbathe for four hours, he tells. I get fucking birthed. Gives go and jump out of a mound! Hes made his GoPro, primarily to take times which could be used to scoff his partner, who wishes she were here.

How wingsuits toil

Sometimes referred to as birdman suits a wingsuit flight intents by distributing a parachute.

Martin, 25, is working in advertisements in London. He did a tandem paraglide with an teacher only a few years ago, and the experience lingered, so hes back to have a go on his own. He acknowledges to being a little bit apprehensive. Among all the josh of the others, he seems quiet and solicitous. Paul, 59, has been paragliding four times before, twisting his ankle on the last. He works in insurance and has always enjoyed trot, dive and climbing. He formerly had a captains licence. When he was diagnosed with cancer six years ago, he got more serious about his fitness and finally lost enough weight to try paragliding. He announces his cancer Nigel and takes pleasure in ignoring its requests. This is one in the eye for Nigel, he announces, as we climb the hill up to the launch area. He postponed some chemotherapy to be here.

Paragliding examines easy, at the least to start with. The equipment is not a parachute but an inflatable offstage, which is laid flat on the hilltop, then fills with breeze, takes shape and face-lifts leaflets off the dirt. Once the basics of territory and equipment-checking are illustrated, the tandem fliers are fastened into a big pitch-black fanny, hooked up to an teach, dragged back by the glider attracting as it rises, then a few speedy stairs launch them sends into the air. The first pamphlet, Andrew, is up 10 instants after we arrive. Bloody hell, mentions Martin.

The rest take off, and its clear theyre having a good time. Smoothly, gracefully, they fly backward and forward over the hillside until it seems almost dull, this boating around, as the initiated called it. Drifting down from the tandems return grabs of conversation that you might well exchange over prosecco. When involved, their teachers liven thoughts up with big-hearted changes and coilings, which appear very exciting. Their domination is so good that they can come over and waver within touching distance while we talk.

Mark Sutton, “the mens” who parachuted into the London Olympics stadium dressed as James Bond, was killed wingsuit moving in the Swiss Alps in 2013. Photo: CHAMUSSY/ SIPA/ REX/ Shutterstock

Science teacher Becky, 35, sits next to me, watching her banker boyfriend, John, enjoy his 39 th birthday present. Its like wearing a nappy, he enunciates when first fastened in. That was awesome, he says on property. Becky did a skydive formerly( crazy at the beginning) and a bungee rush( much worse, because you have to step off ). They didnt provoke in her the addiction that it did in Jess. She talks about the skydive like it was a first taste of marzipan good, yes , not over-rated , no particular need to do it again. Its trying brand-new circumstances, isnt it? she reads. Life would be a bit boring if you dont try new things.

Was life boring before extreme plays? It was surely less safe than it is now.( Gaze up the violent crime and road accident statistics .) Some do Evel Knievel started the cult by showing girls that roughly croaking “couldve been” refrigerate. Some say nonsense, “its been” Sondre Norheim. Or Otto Lilienthal. Or Franz Reichelt. Or Leslie Irvin. Or George Freeth. If you have no idea who those people were, then we havent reached the phase yet where the pioneers of downhill skiing, gliding, parachuting, skydiving and surfing are household names, but it is clear that what they started is no fad. You maybe know somebody who has done all the things these men were considered lunatics for trying. You may have tried a few yourself.

The Dangerous Sports Club needs a special mention, in part for exemplifying the crazed inventiveness and nonconformist ethos of extreme play. Organized by a group of well-to-do sidekicks at Oxford University, the DSC liked to think up perilous capers to play-act wino and in black tie, such as a ancestry down the ski slopes of St Moritz on a Louis XIV dining decide or a grand piano, or voyaging through gusts to the remote islet of Rockall, then accommodating a tea party. A younger is part of the DSC afterward constructed the monstrous trebuchet, which shot beings 100 ft into a net, eventually killing a 19 -year-old student announced Dino Yankov. The enormous gift of the DSC, nonetheless, is bungee jumping, which they acted for the first time on Clifton Suspension Bridge in Bristol on April Fools Day 1979, after a nighttime of boozing, without any preliminary tests.

Sutton with stuntman Gary Connery, in 2012 in Henley-on-Thames, preparing for a jumping. Photo: Gary Connery Archive/ Getty Images

Safety goes more thought these days, but the spirit of experimentation has never undermined in extreme sport. A decade ago, plain basi startle was the new frontier.( Instead of skydiving from a plane, you use a construct, feeler, encompas or Earth cover not bridge because the founders “ve decided that” babe hopping might not be taken as gravely, according to Phil Mayfield, who was one of them .) Today base jump-start is tame without a wingsuit, and wingsuits are tame unless you use them to get close to happenings, from time to time so close like Emanuele piloting through a 2.6 m defect in the rock-and-roll that it is obviously dangerous. But the peril reached him famous.

Perhaps next it will be jet-powered surfboards.( They prevail .) Or kids everywhere will model the Russian roofers who get themselves photographed hanging precariously from towering structures, and often autumn. Last-place month Luke Aikins became the first person to skydive without a parachute. After a descend of 25,000 ft, he landed in a giant net. It is breathtaking, he discovered.

At experiences the inventiveness is virtually ludicrous. Base jumping blindfolded, or with your bird-dog( that was Potter ), or with a parachute attributed to perforates in your back: youll find all of these online. But then, thanks to rugged cameras, video hosting and social media, these brief but stunning times of extreme play are as well-suited to 2016 as “couldve been”. No broadcasters offer billions for skydiving or skateboarding privileges just yet, but GoPro, Red Bull and others sponsor some of best available athletes to roam the world stirring exceedingly marketable clips. If we want a reason why extreme athletics have flourished so much this century, this neat fit between the producers and the money looks just like a good guess.

The number of first-time parachute rushes in Britain has increased by 50% the past 10 years. Photo: Ken Fisher/ Getty Images

And these may still be early days. Harmonizing to a report from the US presentation busines Delaware North, 100 hours of GoPro video are uploaded on to YouTube every minute, and sales of war cameras are growing at 50% a year. By 2020, extreme plays will objection professional and collegiate squad athletics for the claim of most-watched category of plays material, research reports responds. Today theyre a blip on the screen compared to the big business of professional sports, but participation in action and undertaking athletics has outshone conventional plays at the recreational level.

And where their commercial limits lie, it is hard to say. BMX and snowboarding are Olympic occasions now, and clambering, skateboarding and channel-surf will be in 2020. But I wonder whether plays such as wingsuit hovering had now been passed the limit of safety. Perhaps the same get for freediving, in which people rival to swim as deep as is practicable while hampering their breath, and where leading proponents, such as Natalia Molchanova and Nicholas Mevoli have recently died.

Pushing is part of sport, of course, but whats being pushed here is safety. A good footballer or tennis musician always wants to be tested against better opponents, but their opposings are human, so that can only proceed in so far. In extreme athletics, the antagonist is danger. As one of the worlds best known climbers and wingsuit flyers, Steph Davis, wrote in January, the limit comes when you hit the terrain. Instead, she advocated, Perhaps advance intends something very different. Perhaps it makes refining the experience, becoming safer, more beautiful and more mindful. Davis has been married twice, to Dean Potter and Mario Richard. Both men died in wingsuit collisions( Potter after their divorce ). Perhaps the future of extreme sports is hearing to be less extreme.

Read more: www.theguardian.com

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