#i pray for her downfall on a daily basis | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

regrettablewritings · 6 years ago

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How differently do they think of each other now compared to when they first met?: You thought of Clark as anyone who’d ever met him before did: He was timid, and something about his demeanor seemed poorly suited for the frame that actually portrayed it. However, he seemed harmless enough; nothing worth digging into. That was what you had made sure to take note of during your period as a mole for one “Mr. Knight.” (You really wished Mr. Wayne would’ve thought up a less laughable alias, but he wasn’t paying you to criticize. Only to keep your finger on the pulse of Metropolis by infiltrating the ranks of the Daily Planet). However, as time went on, that initial response seemed to shift somewhat.

It didn’t take long for you to notice his frequent disappearances during the work day. When you inquired about it, an apparent friend of his, Lois, explained that it had something to do with some “health concerns” or whatever story he was supposedly working on that week. You raised a brow at the matter but took note for future reference. Part of you wanted to believe that your job (your real one as a mole) had been made a lot easier by potentially having a link to finding out who the caped Kryptonian was. But another part of you was suspicious of the possibility; after all, that would be far too good of luck for that to be the case, right? Probably.

You would’ve been happy to have left it like that, had it not been for the brief but relatively multiple occurrences where you’d witnessed Clark be able to perform acts that would have required excessive strength such as moving a full file cabinet with ease, or gripping the edge of his desk enough to snap the pulpy wood it was made out of. It was perhaps in your need to justify everything that wound up being your downfall. You were on a mission – a very important one at that – and it wouldn’t do to constantly pester your boss about every strange thing that occurred in the area. (If that were the case, you would’ve had the Bruce Wayne lurking around the nightclub scene, intimidating every other person who could do a vape trick through a gaged hole in their mouth.)

In this case, you looked to the small file of Daily Planet workers that Mr. Wayne had provided you with, pleased to use Clark’s farm boy heritage as an excuse for his freakish strength (never mind that he supposedly had health issues that may or may not have a supposed effect on it). But perhaps also you just needed a reason to not have to be suspicious of him: He was, from what few interactions the two of you had had, a very nice guy. Not a Nice Guy™, but a man who appeared to be nice by nature. You sure as heck never met one back in Gotham!

Clark admittedly didn’t have much of an opinion on you for the first chunk of your time undercover. It wasn’t necessarily that you didn’t appear in his awareness enough for him to form an idea of you, it was just that with his self-appointed position as a sort of guardian of the Earth (or at least Metropolis), learning about new coworkers wasn’t really on the top of his list. Especially with this Batman nonsense beginning to spill over from across the bay. But from what he did manage to take note of, however, you were polite and dedicated, always seeing your assigned tasks to the end – which was undeniably something that Clark couldn’t always say for himself.

He didn’t expect the latter to come back to bite him in his nigh-on invincible ass, though.

It didn’t matter to you that he’d insisted that all was forgiven: The amount of guilt you’d accumulated after being tied up into his near-defeat just wouldn’t quit.

“Please,” you said, almost seriously, “punch my body backwards. Fling me into the sun… Lois mentioned you got a place in the Arctic, right? Drop me off there and leave me to fend for myself.”

Once again, Clark found himself laughing (albeit in an attempt to alleviate the tension).

“It’s okay,” he swore. A beat before shrugging. “Well, not okay … But it’s all said and done. You didn’t mean any harm –”

“This entire UC mission was to figure out who Superman was so my boss could kick the shit out of him.”

“… Well, you didn’t mean the extent of the harm, anyway.”

Even after you placed your two-weeks notice at the Daily Planet, thus ending your time in Metropolis, the apologies wouldn’t quit. Nor did your efforts to attempt proportionate compensation via expensive fruit baskets.

(“Wow,” Lois breathed, observing the intricate designs carved into a large watermelon. The great fruit itself had been converted into a basket that now held grapes and honeydew and all sorts of other natural goodies. “Somebody must really like you, Clark.” She smirked as Clark’s ears burned red. He cast his eyes downward, but he knew she knew.)

But eventually he must have gotten sick of fruit or acquired a compost pile too large for the likes of the city, because eventually he contacted you and suggested the two of you settle this in a more agreeable way: Having a nice dinner and chatting. Even though Clark insisted it was something he’d managed to pull together, the fact that the restaurant was practically bare save for the staff gave you the creeping suspicion that he had called in a favor with Mr. Wayne. You intended on asking Clark if this had been the case (aside from his alter ego, the man was pretty honest about everything else), but first: You had to talk about the fight that happened so long ago.

It was by no intention (at least, not of your own) that the discussion would diverge into other topics, which then turned into conversations all a world of their own. Things like how different Metropolis was from Gotham. Or your respective personal lives when not saving the world or writing for a flimsy paper or being a billionaire’s second righthand. Or favorite dishes to cook. Or favorite past times. By the time the night was over, you’d forgotten what the two of you had come together for in the first place.

Fast forward to now, when the two of you are a couple. You still think he’s a dorkish sweetheart, but really only when he’s in civilian mode. This is because you’ve since come to know Clark as being far more multidimensional than the stereotypical, sheepish lad he sells himself as. You respect his sacrificing attitude, nerve-wrecking as it can often be. It’s interesting how a man can seem so ideal yet struggle so much with the weight of what his abilities carry, and he lets you know about that weight often enough. He wants to be the best hero he can, but that’s just plain impossible. Nevertheless, he tries and sometimes he pushes himself too far in the attempts. He needs a lot more comfort and validation than he lets in on, of which you are glad to provide.

Clark is quite glad to learn that being ambitious wasn’t just a trait you wore for your time undercover – it was something that you had arrived in Metropolis with, and one that you carried out in everything you did no matter how big or small. Let’s be real, Clark’s always admired a go-getter, so it’s no surprise that that is perhaps the trait he’s most excited about seeing in you. He admires your openness to carrying out tasks, something of which he can’t quite do as often as he’d like due to who and what he is. However, he’s more than happy to support you because you’re his biggest cheerleader and have faith in him. Going off of this, he also appreciates your loyalty. It’s an impassioned sort, assisted by the aforementioned sense of dedication you display. Once your mind is made up, it would take either a lot or your own self to actually sway you off the course you’d set. No wonder he was able to buy you as a genuine journalist for so long!

What do their friends/family think of their relationship?: Given that he’s far less hostile towards Clark post-fight, Bruce doesn’t feel nearly as threatened about the relationship as he probably could’ve been. Of course, he’s still put off by it: He hadn’t expected his spy to come back dating the very man he’d been afraid of all these years. However, given that he’s grown to trust Clark as a person, all Bruce can do is sigh heavily and just let things happen. The both of you are grown-ups, he trusts nothing weird is going to happen.

“Besides,” he resigns, “at least the guy can protect you if need be.” Damn right he could.

Neither of you get the chance to even tell Lois before she figures it out (the woman isn’t an award-winning investigative journalist for nothing). Honestly, she thought the two of you had been dating long before you actually began (“I thought that the fruit baskets were little tokens of affection after the fifth week of it happening,” she said). However, she is quick to regard the relationship as something straight out of a cheesy romance novel and she’s absolutely living for it.

“Enemies-turned-lovers – god, can Clark ever be a part of something not cliché?” she giggles into her morning coffee the day she figures out the situation. Suffice to say she’s at least glad that the man is actually interacting with more people on a regular basis than just her. On that note, the League also soon finds out (because let’s be real, Diana could either see it in Clark’s features, or Bruce blabbed about it). With the exception of Bruce (who is exasperated about it), the League is predominately neutral regarding the relationship. Actually, scratch that: Barry bluntly comments about how strange the union is because “didn’t [Clark] almost die because of the information [you] got on [him]?” He doesn’t mean to come off in any negative kind of way, it just perplexes him at first. However, given that he and Clark are “speed buddies” and therefore share kindred, sprinted spirits, he trusts Clark’s decision and is happy for him.

When you finally videochat your family so they can finally lay their eyes on your boyfriend, you have to pray to whatever god is out there that the camera feed is too grainy for them to make out Clark’s features too well. When your sibling commented on how Clark looks vaguely familiar, your stomach took a plunge into your bowls. Thankfully, Clark was able to play it off as a joke about how he just has “basic white guy face.” It manages to get a chuckle out of your family. All in all, they think you’ve found yourself a “fine young man.” It’s your friends, however, you struggle the most with. It’s not that they disapprove of the relationship �� far from it, in fact – it’s just that with them being physically present and far more social media savvy, it’s harder to keep them from recognizing Clark as the controversial Kryptonian. As a result, Clark kept his almost sheepish workplace demeanor, adding fuel to the image by always opting to wear clothes that are just unflattering to his figure. Nothing godawful, but definitely nothing to indicate at the 6’1” mass of pure muscle that he really was.

No neither side’s surprise, they bought it. Mainly because Clark was naturally very likable. Your friends boldly praise Clark for being “a rare breed of man”, and you for managing to snag him. It’s when they ask you guys how you met, however, that things had to be fudged a bit. As far as they know, you two met while he was interviewing you for a piece that wound up getting cancelled. You’re pretty sure they wouldn’t be able to handle learning you’re involved with espionage, much less that it was the reason you are now dating Superman.

How do their personalities/skills complement or contrast with each other?: While both you and Clark are go-getters, it’s really only in your own respective rights. For example, it’s in his nature to present it as tamer. He works in ways that, at their core, are meant to minimize damages to the best of his ability. (Whether or not this actually plays out, of course, depends on the circumstances.) This isn’t to say that you’re necessarily rambunctious but being that you were trained under and employed by a man with an “any means necessary” point of view, it’s easy to sometimes let your ambitions get the better of you. You both are also skilled in the ways of being elusive, with it being in your job description by the nature of the job, and with it being a necessity for him to be able to be Superman and Clark separately.

What is their favorite aspect of each other?: Even from day one, with what little you knew or cared about Clark, you had to admit: You admired his kindly nature. Depressing as it was to say, it just wasn’t a common thing to find in people, much less the men hardened by urban living. And your job and all its accompaniments hadn’t necessarily convinced you otherwise – you were just so used to seeing and reporting horrible, dark things about seemingly nice people that you had lost quite a bit of hope by the time Clark had rolled around. In fact, you honestly didn’t really by his willingness to help or his politeness – at first. But once he proved that everything about his efforts was genuine, you couldn’t help but admire those traits. A little too much so, in your initial opinion.

Part of you even questioned your own reliability, that maybe you took small, normal instances of him being a decent human and exaggerated them to godlike status to make your eventual romantic relationship with him more justifiable. But ultimately you clung to it: The universe was offering you a walking piece of Heaven, who were you to truly deny yourself that? Of course, it sometimes exhausted you to see him try to fulfill expectations that weren’t even necessarily there (especially with his Clark Kent alias), but more on that later. In healthy doses, his unselfishness was his strongest point.

Having been raised in a farming community, Clark grew up appreciating the value of working hard to get results. This has since bled into the real world where go-getters tend to gain some bit of admiration within him, especially those who use their determination to see a job through to a greater good. Granted, the situations wherein you tended to use this trait of yours are a bit controversial: Espionage, for all intents and purposes, was a shady business to get into, especially since his first awareness of your involvement in it required you to be a mole and feed your employer information, of which subsequently got Clark’s ass kicked. But you win some brownie points when he gets to observe that same diligence in you outside of work. If you set your sights on a project or something you wish to acquire, you’re going to see it through, from getting a recipe for a stay-in date night down, to attempting to fix the dryer despite knowing very little about handyman-ship.

Suffice to say, godly being loves a trier.

Do either of them have pet peeves about each other?: It may seem cold, but you hate that Clark blames himself for not being able to stop anything and everything. It’s ridiculous. He may be “godlike” to the eyes of many, but that doesn’t make him God, much less suggest that even God helps everybody. He just needs to accept to the vest of is ability that there are some (and by some, you mean plenty) of things he can’t do. That’s what makes him human. He doesn’t … take this bluntness too well. Yes, he knows you’re right, but the delivery of this type of sensitive subject doesn’t always flow sweetly through your lips. And that’s what he doesn’t like.

Your concern for his self-validation doesn’t always translate as being from a place of good intentions, unfortunately. Sometimes you just come off as cold and cruel. And that is probably when he dislikes from you: That despite being a very caring person, you seem to be a little more detached compared to him. You’re more so about people rather than for people, whereas he has built himself up as a figure for people and about people. As a result, he sometimes feels beside himself, thinking that your aloof nature shouldn’t be excused by what you’ve experienced and that it only contributes to a bigger problem as a whole.

The truth of the matter is that while both sides have valid arguments, the delivery of such concerns – especially when in the heat of an argument – can result in ill delivery of either impression.

The words “martyr syndrome”, “ridiculous”, “cold”, and “selfish” are likely to be thrown about until you either storm off or he practically blasts out of the apartment before he accidentally lasers the kitchen counter out of rage.

How would each reconcile with each other after a fight?: Cool down time is especially important in a situation wherein one member of the couple is capable of accidentally setting off a very dangerous super power when enraged. Clark would never hurt you, mind you; even when frustrated with you, he would never wish you ill in spite of what he may imply when blinded by anger. However, you make him pretty vulnerable, mind you. And sometimes, that vulnerability may mess with his ability to focus on trying not to smash a balled fist against the coffee table and turning it into toothpicks upon impact. And while you may not be anywhere near that strong or gifted with abilities that would allow you to destroy things with the same capacity, you still have plenty of anger to simmer down from.

Screaming into a pillow usually only does so much (mostly just making your throat and head hurt), so more often than not you’ll try to nap away the pain. If you manage to wake up before Clark comes back, there’s a slight chance you’ll be in a better mood. Maybe not a perfect one, but you’ve at the very least calmed down a bit. Depending on the situation, you may have even accepted that you can’t stay mad forever, let alone with him, and you want to just end this silly dispute and make peace. You wait up for him to return which, in itself, is a feat considering that his abilities allow him to literally travel all over the world in record time – which he has done in some cases under the duress of an argument. If you stay up for hours, even into the blooming light of the rising sun, he won’t even try to talk with you when he returns – he’ll just usher you back to bed and quietly say you’ll talk when you’re both well-rested.

When that time eventually comes, the keyword here is “softer.” Speak what you mean in softer language. Don’t sugarcoat it, but there’s definitely a better way to state your claim than, “Shit happens everywhere in the world, it’s not your job or even your ability to clean it all up, nor should you kick your own ass about it.” Clark will be patient and let you tell your side, nodding or furrowing his brows at certain comments, before telling his own side of the situation regarding himself. Then, when you’re ready, he’ll confide in you (in softer terms) his worry that you’re being too indifferent about the current state of the world and his place in them. He understands you don’t mean to come off in such a way, but it just concerns him that you’ve really given up on everything.

Of course, you haven’t. You just felt it was easier to cope with everything this way. He understands. Just like deep down, you understand that your beloved boyfriend just wants to bring to the world more peace than there was before he came. Neither part may necessarily agree with the others’ methods or how it may impact them (making you cold, making him filled with anxiety), but the most that you can do is be there for one another. Offer each other support and love and keep as much of a balance as possible. Because in the end, you keep him grounded and Clark lifts you up.

What would be their ideal vacation getaway together?: It’s hard to place where or even what vacationing with Clark would look like to be honest. Given who Clark is, he can’t always just up and decide to take a break. At least, that’s what he convinces himself. And it drives you absolutely nuts! Once Lois and Diana catch wind of this, they’re on Clark’s back like college students on free food, scolding him for “neglecting his boyfriend duties.” He only really gives in after Diana’s fifty-fifth insistence that the League can handle things in his absence. However, it then becomes a matter of where to go.

Given his abilities, he can and has easily traveled to other countries in very little time with few to no difficulties. But since he more often than not is not there to take in the scenery or culture, this makes it only a bit easier. However, you insist that on vacation he ought to act a little more normal so that he can get the full experience. This means you have to choose a vacation destination wisely, otherwise y’all have wasted money. Generally speaking, Clark’s nervousness about being too far from Metropolis is likely going to affect how far the two of you go at first, never mind how easy it would be for him to just fly back if the League truly did need him. However, enough nudging can result in a trip a little further from Metropolis than Clark would have expected to be besides Smallville.

He finds that he likes Yosemite Park. Not so much the crowds it tends to draw, but definitely the hiking trails and the potential picnics that could be had further away from the screeches of children and bellowing of their frustrated parents. Plus, his abilities make going further inward and elsewhere all the more easy, with getting lost or having to escape potentially dangerous animals being a thing of the past when Clark can easily fly above the treetops and back toward civilization if need be. Of course, he still tries to avoid being cocky and to keep his wits about him, but for the most part, Clark finds himself enjoying the vacation. Once he’s gotten through his hesitancies and potential guilt about relaxing, he practically collapses into a puddle of released stresses, his head warming your lap as the two of you enjoy the gentle breeze of the little patch of forest you decided to spend your little picnic for two in.

He dreadfully misses it when it comes time for him to resume his jobs as both a reporter and as guardian of Metropolis (and, furthermore, the world).

Think of a new way (AU, different situation, etc.) they could have met for the first time

The world was strange, and Clark wasn’t sure how much right he had to conclude that for himself. Because, on one hand, he was a flying, laser-shooting alien with unparalleled strength. But on the other, he was involved with a team composed of two technical demigods (both whose people were thought to be myths), a cyborg revived from the brink of death by a box, and a man fast enough to phase through solid material with just the proper amount of focus. This went without mentioning the fact that his enemy-turned friend was a billionaire who’d been dressing like a bat for the last three decades but, all things considered, that was arguably normal by comparison.

But, with the exception of Victor, you never would’ve assumed such oddities about any of them. Not at first glance at least. But that was the point: The world could only handle so much strangeness before people became too opposed to it for it to carry on. Which was why it made Clark a little more than on edge when things around Metropolis started to seem a little … odd.

It started off with little things: Black marks appearing in alleyways, cracking and booming noises often occurring before or after. “Not unlike thunderclaps,” witnesses would later say. TVs and other electrical devices going wonky or even outright snapping out of life. Fuse boxes would be blackened, the areas around them sometimes scorched. But the electric companies couldn’t find anything about the equipment that would suggest sabotage; and inspectors on the case found little to nothing that could suffice as evidence that there was purposeful vandalism. And with all the more obvious surveillance cameras damaged before any footage could be captured, there was only so much to go on. There was little rhyme or reason indicating a pattern to which areas got struck besides the fact that they tended to be in wealthier areas, but considering much of Metropolis was inhabited by the upper-class, it was nearly a moot note so the likelihood of a successful stakeout was remarkably slim – if performed by the average cop.

Bruce wasn’t a cop. But he also wasn’t the average detective. It had taken some time and a lot of surveillance, coupled with Lois’ own findings done on her own time, but by the end of a month and a half, they were pretty certain they had found their culprit. All that was left was to have Clark find them and bring them in, hopefully to join the League.

Why Clark?

“Pretty sure that if you get electrocuted, you’ll just register it as a tickle,” Bruce admitted. Blunt, but fair.

Still, Clark couldn’t help but think as he scouted the skies one night, maybe the rich guy who has plenty of time the next day to rest might want to go searching in the middle of the night?

But there was no use in arguing, much less at this point. Though some small part of him wish he’d put up a bit more of a fight beforehand. Normally, Clark was glad to have found the city experiencing little to no issues, especially at night. However, considering the added weight of expectations placed on this particular outing, there he couldn’t help but hold a little bit of anticipation in him –

VwwmmmmmpapapapKRACK.

It was faint, being in the distance, but it was nothing his hearing couldn’t register: The sound of fuse tampering and popping out of life. There, some odd three miles away: There was a glow swelling and slightly throbbing with diminishing power, crawling out of an alleyway into the night air.

Well, Clark thought somewhat optimistically. At least I won’t have to track them down based on looks alone …

+++++++++

Moving to Metropolis was supposed to be the start of something new. Something good and new, specifically. Not getting into a freak accident involving a weird, unnatural-looking cloud appearing just as you were checking out your apartment’s fuse box and waking up months later from a comatose state. That alone should have been enough of a cue that things weren’t going to go your way.

But, oh, it didn’t stop there. It would’ve been fine to have stopped when a majority of your clothes would stick to you regardless of the fashion; that was bearable. But it went on: From your phone exploding in your touch to your electronics following suit. It didn’t stop when the electricity in your building flickered with your rage; nor did it stop when, on a fearful whim, you attempted to summon as much voltage from as many transformers in a three-block radius as possible – and succeeded. Well, that is, before your attempts to return the acquired energy resulted in their sources exploding. You weren’t trying that again.

Not until you had a better grasp of it all… . But god, why was it all so dam hard to grasp?

You’d though it be best to practice in the richer parts of town – the electric company would be in a far bigger hurry to bring them their power back, the absolute bastards. But with how many generators and the like you were destroying, you were running out of practice space.

You groaned as you watched the circuit box before you begin to putter out of use.

“Greeeeat, (Y/N),” you told yourself. “You finally begin to get the hang of putting shit back where it came, you get a little too excited, and blam-o.” The all too familiar feeling of disappointment developed a sigh in you; you had long since passed feeling anxious about the destruction of property, and you knew you could do no good by trying to fix it. All you could do now was leave the scene, pretend to sleep peacefully, and try to figure out where to go next.

It had been nearly two months since you started your high-voltage, highly dangerous practicing; surely by now the cops were on to you, what with most of your “victims” being people of note. Logic said to shake them off your trail by moving to a type of location they wouldn’t have seen comic. But … that meant going to lower-income neighborhoods. And as much as you wanted to figure out how to stop blowing up electronics by touch, you really weren’t comfortable with doing it at the expense of those who needed the help more.

“Good evening,” came a voice, yanking you out of your nervous thoughts. It had taken your brain a moment to register it, but you could’ve sworn it came come from the sky: A type of voice dashing heroes in old movies would use; heroes with big, strong chins.

Superman did, of course, have such a feature on him, you came to find. But as he descending from the sky, into the alley (thus blocking your way out), you were forced to consider that every feature he had appeared to be big and strong: His towering height, his bulging muscles that the suit made no effort to hide, his … hands that would most definitely kill you if he so much as poked you with one finger.

That last thought alone, even in a hypothetical sense, was all it took for your fight or flight senses to kick in, your hands suddenly flying up in defense with fizzles of what electricity you’d collected springing in your palms.

Superman, however, did not flinch. He barely even regarded your sparkling, trembling hands (which did nothing for your confidence, both in your abilities and in your chances of getting out of this unmaimed).

“You don’t want to do that,” Superman stated. Simple as that. And he was right: You really didn’t want to have to “fight” him. But what else could you do?

On Clark’s own end, he could just feel the anxiety radiating off of you. He didn’t even have to listen for your heartbeat thundering in your chest. Honestly, though he hated to admit it, looking at you reminded him of seeing small, scared animals back in Smallville. Rabbits and mice found scittering about on the farm to be more specific.

On one hand, he was just glad you weren’t some hyper-powered hooligan willing to throw a punch in a fight they weren’t ready for. But on the other, he felt a little bad scaring you like this. It was probably best if he didn’t near you. For now.

“It’s okay,” he offered. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

You sighed and lowered your hands, your pitiful static fizzling to a halt. “Look,” you said quietly, “I promise I’ll go away. I’ll switch towns! I swear!”

At this, the man furrowed his brows. “I’m afraid that can’t happen …” Your heart plummeted before being slingshotted back into a revived desire to plea and flee.

“I swear, okay! Nobody was supposed to get hurt!” you insisted. “I don’t think anybody even really got hurt, per se … Just inconvenienced. But I promise, it won’t happen again – ” In the midst of your rambling, Superman took a step towards you. It was a simple movement, all things considered, but for you, in this moment of high stress, it might as well have been an outright threat. You couldn’t stop yourself from releasing a pathetic yelp, nearly stepping all over your own feet to take a few steps back.

Crap, Clark cursed. Okay, clearly acting serious and stern was helping nobody. At this point, you were probably going to run in the opposite direction and smack your skull against the dead end of the alleyway. To hell with this.

“Hey, hey, hey,” he suddenly said. He raised his hands in a weak attempt to show his change of demeanor. “It’s okay, it’s okay, I’m not going to hurt you.” You had to admit, even in your moment of fear, the sudden shift in tone was not lost on you.

He still had hints of old school hero in his voice, but now there was something … more? It was hard to place (especially in your current jumpy state), but you were just able enough to pick out nodes of what his voice now held: Sunshine; apples; the type of voice a sweet man running a humble little bookstore or fruit stand might have.

It had to have been a trap. You weren’t one to disapprove of Superman, given all that he’s done, but being on the other side of him just wasn’t doing much for your ability to think straight. And Clark could sense it.

“Hey,” he tried again. “I’m sorry if I scared you.” You blinked, a brow slowly beginning to raise. “We – I’ve been looking for you, per a friend’s request, and – ” No sooner had he said it, Clark regretted it. The look of resumed discomfort of your face made him really acknowledge that.

“ ‘Friend’?” you demanded. “Who the hell is your friend? What do you want?!”

Oh, geez.

“Listen, please, remain calm!” Clark pleaded. To him, in that moment, he’d thought he’d been sounding gentle enough. But as the nearby streetlights began to flicker, he knew better.

Once again, regret: If there was anything he’d learned working with Lois and Bruce, it was that telling someone on the verge of panic or in the midst of complete frustration to “calm down” in any sense was a bad, bad, bad idea. Saying so to a person who had powers, controlled or not, however? Absolutely terrible idea.

While your previous attempt at intimidation by way of summoning electricity had done little to impress Clark, he had to admit: You were a bit better at it now. The more the streetlights blinked, the more streams of electronic light appeared to gather towards you, specifically in your palms and feet.

“Look, buddy,” you hissed. “I’ve been dealing with a lot of crap leading up to this. I moved to a new city. I got goddamn electrocuted into a coma – ” At this point, Clark couldn’t help but notice thin streaks of static begin to make a beeline towards your eyes. Not promising, if his experience had told him so.

You gritted your teeth, increasingly glowing eyes narrowing. “Then! I wake up to these – these stupid, stupid powers! Powers I don’t have the first fucking clue of how to control. But do you see me running around, actively trying to kill people like every other goddamn psycho in this ‘city of tomorrow’? No! I’ve had to figure all this crap out on. My. Own.” The brights of your eyes increased, simultaneously illuminating the growing rage of your expression while also blinding Clark to being able to make it out in the first place.

At your feet, small currents began to sizzle against the crackling pavement. You were no longer trying to back away: You took a step forward, and it definitely made Clark feel worry.

“Could I have done it differently? Sure. Maybe. But don’t forget, Flyboy: I could’ve been so. Much. Worse!” Clark could hear the tingling rattle of lightbulbs struggling within the streetlights, trying to retain whatever power they could.

“I – ” But Clark was cut off.

“And you,” you growled, “have the audacity … To tell me to calm DOWN?!” In that moment, three things happened in the following order:

The first had been that your eyes, filled with so much fury, could no longer remain squinted; they widened, revealing themselves to be entirely white with pure energy at this point. The second thing appeared to be connected with the sudden snapping, due to it being how any lightbulb in a streetlight or artsy lamp within a three-block radius became overwhelmed – too overwhelmed to maintain proper form, in fact. They popped and shattered, leaving bits of glass to tumble to the streets below.

The third instance, however, had nothing to do with your powers: It was just Clark, getting a word in.

“I get it,” he said. Had there been any lightbulbs left, they might have shattered as well in sync with the snarl you gave the man.

“Quit lying!” you demanded. The wave of volts began to ripple all the more erratically. But Clark held his ground.

“I’m not lying,” he swore. He even placed one hand to his heart, the other upright. “Scout’s honor.” Unfortunately for him, the sincerity of a Boy Scout appeared to mean little to you. He went on, “I didn’t always have control of my powers. I didn’t have anyone to help me figure them out; I had to wing it!” You raised a bemused brow in reaction.

Okay … Clark thought. It’s … better than the glare, I guess? He swallowed. Dare to try one last time before things potentially get yucky?

“That’s, uh, actually why I’ve … come to find you,” he stated. “The friend? I swear he’s a good man. A little rough around the edges, but – ”

“You’re not helping your case,” you snapped.

“I’m a part of a sort of group, there’s people like you and me, and we think it’d be best if you joined – er, if you wanted to.”

“Ah. So, you want to basically make me into a weapon?”

“Nonononono, not that at all. I swear. It’s just – Look, even if you don’t want to join,” Clark bit his lip, “we could at least potentially find a way to help you get those powers under control so that you won’t keep breaking stuff.” A beat passed. “Well,” he shrugged, “it’s more like my friend will. He’s good with science and can definitely provide the right materials.”

To his credit, Clark did begin to notice an apparent lapse in the energy you were emitting. It was hard for the average eye to properly compute it but for him, the change was definitely there.

On your own end, you had to admit: The temptation was definitely lingering through his words. But then, perhaps you were just desperate and overwhelmed and looking for an out in this entire situation. But something still very much bothered you.

“How can I know I can trust you?” you asked, brow completely scrunched with uncertainty. The entire situation considered, it was still a bit of a shocker for one to not entirely trust the great and beloved Superman’s words. And, judging by his stumbling, it wasn’t a scenario he had been prepared to answer right on the spot.

“Uh – Becaaauussseee …” Another thing Clark had learned working with Lois and Perry Mason: The longer you stammer and search for answers, the less legit your word comes cross. His mind scrambled for something, anything that would win your favor over. But, in the end, there was only one thing that stood out. And, for the first time completely since landing in that alley, Clark felt just as nervous as you had.

“My … name …” He inhaled deeply, trying his best not to exhale chill winds. “My name … is Clark Kent. I work with The Daily Planet.”

You blinked. “… Pardon?” The voltage at your feet dampened.

Clark continued, “I’m a Kryptonian refugee, but I was raised here on Earth. The friend who sent me here is – ” He stopped himself short before deciding that Bruce could kick his ass about this later. “It’s Bruce Wayne.”

“Bruce Wayne?!” you interjected. Part of you wanted to call crap but the other part of you had to remember that the man in front of you was claiming to be a humanoid alien who worked at the local newspaper; who’s to say he really wasn’t acquainted with the rich guy across the bay? Judging by the hint of smile this Clark Kent guy let slip, you … honestly couldn’t bring yourself to really disbelieve him. The static at your fingertips dribbled into your palms before shrinking away.

“Yeah, uh … It’s a bit of a story,” Clark claimed, a bit of sheepishness in his voice.

The shift from mostly illuminated to just barely lit by the light of the moon was sudden and startling. But for Clark, it was a good thing. The ground immediately beneath you had been blackened by your doing, but you otherwise appeared perfectly fine, if a bit curious.

“Got proof?” you asked.

“I mean, I gave you my secret identity – that’s pretty trusting if I do say so myself,” Clark pointed out. As much as you hated to admit it, he had a point. And you were getting awfully tired. In fact …

In that moment, you had realized something: That was about the most power and damage you’d caused ever since getting these powers in one fell swoop. You were a little impressed. But you were also plenty concerned. Sure, you’d meant to be threatening in the moment, but the fact still remained: If the only other person around hadn’t been Superman, how easily could you have actually harmed another person in your moment of anger? The second you attempted to truly ponder it, a shudder threatened to ripple through your body; you did not enjoy considering those odds.

But how long until you got so pissed off that you pulled another one of those? How long until you actually did cause harm? That thought was even worse …

“Are you positive?” you mumbled, causing Clark to cock his head by an inch.

“I’m sorry?” he questioned.

You looked him dead in the eye and dared him to lie: “Are you positive you guys can, like, help me control my powers?” The smile he gave you alone would have been enough to convince you.

“We’ve trained with literal scientific anomalies and legends, Miss. I can assure you: You’re in good company with us.” The sweet, honey warmness of his voice did everything to calm the well of fear and guilt within you. It was more than enough.

“Okay,” you said with finality.

“Okay?”

“Mhm. Let’s do this.” Almost instantly, however, you raised your fingers to draw a point. “But I’m not fighting or anything. Just so we’re clear. I’m just coming along to get my groove in order, so tell your ‘friend’, Bruce Wayne, alright?”

The man didn’t even try to hide a chuckle at your stance. You were going to be just fine, he’d decided. And you? Well … the jury was still out on whether or not this was where your move to Metropolis would finally turn into a good, new thing.

#i had to repost because the original’s format was terrible on the app #regrettablewritings #hopefully this one is better...#clark kent x reader #clark kent imagines #clark kent imagine #clark kent headcanon #clark kent headcanons #superman imagine #superman imagines #superman x reader #dceu headcanons #dceu imagines

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prezaki · 6 years ago

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A Thousand Second Chances - The life story of Eddie Brock

from Venom (2018) Issue # 2

I just spent a week speed-reading through every single comic appearance Eddie Brock has made in the 30 years since his creation and I fell in love with his character hard and fast. In order to process all that I’ve learned myself, I feel like I need to write down his life story with thoughts and important moments. Figured I might as well make this public since it might help out other new fans who don’t have the time and madness to dig through 30 years of comic history. Any older fans reading, feel free to correct me if I’m getting my Marvel lore wrong, I am VERY new to this and hopelessly overwhelmed.

This fully ignores ‘Venom: Dark Origin’ because it frankly just contradicts every other mention of backstory. It also thus ignores Mary Brock, the sister who was invented to justify the Nova crossover issues and who doesn’t appear outside of these two things, because she frankly doesn’t fit the rest of the lore either.

Content warning for suicide applies everywhere here, it’s a topic that comes up time and time again in Eddie’s life.

This got... long.

Eddie is born as the son of Carl and Jamie Brock. Unfortunately, Jamie passed away during Eddie’s birth, leaving his father emotionally cold towards him. The family is wealthy so Eddie is always well-provided for, but he never receives any affection. In order to win praise, Eddie studies hard (top grades) and gets into sports (beginning his lifelong passion towards muscle training), but nothing is successful. His dad did apparently make some worrisome statements though. (from: Lethal Protector, except for the panel which is from the Maximum Carnage arc)

At some point in his childhood Eddie gets into a car accident that cost Carl a lot of his fortune. Nothing is specified about this as of yet, but it looks like the current arc might go into detail. (from: Venom 2018)

Eddie gets into college and when the Watergate scandal happens, he is inspired to change his career to journalism. This places his birth year around 1950, I suppose? (from: Lethal Protector)

After college, Eddie gets a job at the Daily Globe, where he works as a successful investigative journalist.

At some point here, he meets Anne Weying and they begin a relationship. She describes him as ‘smart, witty and boyish’ (though he’d never show it in front of his father). He used to love taking her to fairs and amusement parks. The two get married. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

During his work for the daily globe he encounters a creature named Krooba. This is some weird bonus story and I only mention it because this panel is honestly hilarious. (from: Marvel Flashback series)

Then the Sin-Eater murders shake New York and Eddie interviews a source who claims to be the culprit - but just as Eddie reveals their identity, Spider-Man catches the real Sin-Eater. Eddie is disgraced as a journalist because he fell for a compulsive confessor. He loses his job with the Globe due to this incident. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

This also fully destroys his relationship with his father whom he now doesn’t have contact to anymore. Anne says he lost his boy-ish charm here and started seeming a little mad. Their marriage falls apart. (from: Lethal Protector)

To make a living, Eddie now has to write made-up stories for gossip magazines. He describes these as ‘venomous’ and that descriptor is the reason for his later pseudonym ‘Venom’. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

He starts body-building excessively during this time in hopes to relieve the tension. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Through all this he blames Spider-Man for his downfall - this is not logical, but hey, blaming others makes things easier. Eddie is a person with an astounding one-track-mind and a tendency for splitting.

Eddie can’t handle the misery of his current life and grows strongly suicidal. However, he is also a practicing catholic and struggles with the fact that suicide is considered a sin. Thus he goes to the Our Lady of Saints church to pray for forgiveness before ending his life. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

In front of the church he hesitates and is encouraged to go inside by Deadpool, who is totally oblivious to Eddie’s actual intentions. Yes, really. (from: Deadpool: Back in Black)

In the church, Eddie encounters the symbiote that Spider-Man brought back to earth as his suit and which he then subsequently rejected after finding out it is a living creature. Both Eddie and the symbiote hate Spider-Man, so they take this as basis to bond together.

Important here is that it is literally canon that Spider-Man inadvertendly taught the symbiote how to love (from: Web of Spider-Man) and that the symbiote wants to try and make their relationship with Eddie more mutual than the one with Spider-Man (from: First Kill). So take THAT as you want.

In the first day of being together with the symbiote, Eddie takes down some criminals who murdered his neighbour and establishes his vigilante killing style through it. (from: First Kill)

Eddie makes first attempts to kill Spider-Man (whose civilian identity he knows thanks to the symbiote’s memories) by pushing him in front of a train and trying to throw him off a roof. (from: Web of Spider-Man)

There’s some weird special story set in this timeframe about how he gets the advice of some veteran he interviewed on the job once to do this. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Then he attacks Spidey directly and they fight in the church.... and well, Eddie dons a priest costume for a while, just... because aesthetic. He does have a flair for the dramatic.

This is probably the appropriate time to mention that from here on Eddie is always naked. Every time you see Eddie Brock wearing clothes, it is the symbiote assuming the shape of clothes. Eddie wears underwear at best and even that is often not present.

Eddie loses this battle with Spidey and is sent to The Vault, a super high security prison. Escaping from there, he kills a guard who happens to be an influential person’s son and well, it bites him in the ass later. Important here is also that Eddie absolutely always laments it when he ‘has’ to kill innocents. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

In trying to get to Peter after this, Eddie visits Aunt May a few times pretending to be Peter’s friend. It is hilarious. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

The next attempt at besting Spider-Man is ended by Spidey pretending to accept the symbiote back, which the symbiote is actually excited about, much to Eddie’s dismay. However, the bond with Eddie is too strong for the symbiote to simply sever it and both symbiote and Eddie pass out from the strain of trying. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

This is a good time to mention that in the 2003 Spectacular Spider-Man run it is revealed that actually Eddie had terminal cancer All Along and knew he’d die without the symbiote, so part of him wanting to kill Spider-Man is a wish to eliminate host body competition and thus survive. I personally absolutely think this is an asspull that undermines a lot of the first 20 years of characterization, but eh.

Eddie goes back to The Vault and has not one but two run-ins with the Avengers when attempting to break out. Neither attempt is successful and in the end he uses the symbiote’s abilities to fake his own death in order to successfully escape.

A huge battle over who gets to kill Spider-Man happens and Styx touches Venom... the symbiote takes the brunt of this attack to protect Eddie - and thus they seemingly die for him. And this is like written in 1990. Eddie literally cries about it. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Now a normal human, Eddie is sent to the normal human prison Ryker’s Island where he is cellmates with the serial killer Cletus Kasady. Eddie works out a lot in the cell and it drives Cletus crazy - he brings that up again more than once. Big mad about the muscle gains. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Though Eddie also just plain beats Cletus up during this time because Eddie hates people who kill innocents. This might have contributed to Cletus hating his muscles. (from: Carnage 2016)

The symbiote isn’t dead and returns for Eddie! They break out! Also the symbiote literally gives birth during this process, no biggie. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Venom and Spider-Man fight again. Venom actually gets Spidey unconscious in this battle but instead of killing him then, he... kidnaps Spidey to an abandoned island to have another fight. Eddie just gotta be that extra. During this fight Spidey fakes his death and escapes. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Eddie decides to live happily ever after with the symbiote and just stay on the island. They’re very happy together. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Sometime here, Darkhawk gets stranded on the island, fights Venom, gets spared by Venom. Life’s like that. (from: Darkhawk)

Then he meets Wolverine inside of Wolverine’s nightmare because sometimes Marvel is ???? like that ??? (from: Marvel Presents)

Eddie’d probably have happily stayed on this island forever, had the child the symbiote gave birth to not bonded to Cletus Kasady, creating Carnage. Spider-Man realizes that Eddie, knowing symbiotes, is probably a big help in fighting a symbiote-bonded killer so he reveals himself to Eddie again and gets him off the island to fight Carnage. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Once Carnage is defeated, Eddie just gets sent back to The Vault.

There is some weird episode here where Matt Murdock is his attorney and he tries to get free by pleading insanity and pretending the symbiote died. That fails of course. (from: Trial of Venom)

Then an even weirder episode happens where Venom encounters a bunch of villains and then just ends back up in jail anyway.

Which he then breaks out of and hears Spider-Man’s parents are still alive. This really gets to Eddie because in his mindset (which the symbiote only enhances - they influence each other mutually for the worse at this point) Spidey is a corrupting force and thus he needs to protect... his parents from him.... so he kidnaps the Parkers..... (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Spidey had ENOUGH of Venom at this point and tries to think of new ways to get him to stop already. Thus he contacts Anne and gets Anne to talk to Eddie. Eddie still very much loves Anne. It still takes Spidey saving Anne from falling debris and Anne’s subsequent explanation that Spidey IS saving innocents to make Eddie back off. But hey, he backs off!

And moves back to his birth city, San Francisco. Here a lot of things start happening very rapidly. Eddie encounters an underground city of social outcasts. A family member of the guard he murdered put together The Jury to kill him in retaliation. Life Foundation wants his symbiote. Spider-Man is there. Lethal Protector is a ride and I truly recommend it.

Life Foundation extracts symbiotes from Eddie’s symbiote to try and weaponize them, Spidey and Venom battle them together.

In the end, Eddie also saves the underground city from Life Foundation and moves in there as their protector, much to the joy of local resident Elizabeth who wanted him down there all along.

Then Eddie temporarily goes back to New York because Carnage is back. After getting badly beat up, Eddie comes to Spidey for help and... just goes to sleep on his couch. He changes into pajamas and all.

To stop Carnage, Spidey, Venom and the Black Cat form an alliance but Spidey remains strongly opposed to Venom’s muuuch more pragmatic view on life and death. He isn’t called lethal protector for nothing. Much moral debate is had. Maximum Carnage is a fun arc.

Then Eddie goes back home to his underground city and demonstrates his one-track mind in his solo series Funeral Pyre, where he tries very hard to help an undercover journalist trapped in a gang and still fails, creating Pyre in the process....

During some Daredevil issues, Eddie tries to steal a serum to erase Venom’s weaknesses but in the end doesn’t get it.

During some Silver Sable issues he... exists and helps her gang, I guess.

Then he appears in some Darkhawk issues where they rematch.

Back to solo-series; in The Madness, Eddie gets infected with a sentient virus, making it three people in his body. The virus is pretty crazy and assaults and frightens Eddie’s almost-girlfriend Beck, who is overall already convinced that the symbiote makes Eddie more mad. She states she can’t date him due to this and the two remain simply friends. Eddie gets rid of the virus in the end and returns it to where it came from.

The Enemy Within comes next and it’s just... goblins in San Fransico. Eddie teams up with Morbius against those goblins. Many goblins.

Then Venom fights Hulk because why not. (from: Venom vs Hulk)

Soon after, Venom appears in a few Iron Man issues because he believes Tony Stark’s business practices to be corrupt and tries to kill him for it.

In The Mace, conflict arises in the underground city and causes Mace and Venom to fight one another. Namely, people from the underground city attack others, who attack in retaliation - once Eddie learns that some of his people started this mess, he kills the offending underground city residents (and keeps it secret from Beck who asked him to spare them).

Venom then teams up with Nightwatch for a short appearance in the Nightwatch series.

During Nights of Vengeance both Elizabeth and Beck get kidnapped, inviting other characters to speculate on Eddie’s love life. Eddie states he won’t date either woman as he is too dangerous to date anyone. There’s also aliens who take over minds in this comic. That’s the actual main plot of these issues.

Now it’s time for Eddie’s next return to New York! Carlton Drake and his Life Foundation are working on something called The Arachnis Project (which is also the name of this arc) to create spider humans - hearing of this, Eddie travels to New York to get revenge against Life Foundation for the events of Lethal Protector.

The Jury has started working for Life Foundation in the meantime, though the events of these comics cause that connection to sever. However, they’re still in the same facility, so they do run into Venom there. Jury and Venom try to kill each other while Spider-Man desperately tries to stop any death on either end from happening.

Also Life Foundation gets defeated, obviously. Eddie returns to San Francisco.

Only to come back to NY shortly after due to news about the prison Carnage is held in.

Here, Eddie runs into Peter’s clone, the Scarlet Spider. In battle with him, Eddie gets separated from his symbiote and both of them get taken into custody to be studied, setting up the events of the Separation Anxiety mini-series.

Separation Anxiety marks the first time the reader ever gets to hear the symbiote’s thoughts and the majority of these thoughts are “Eddie” as the symbiote is desperate to return to him.

During this period of extended separation from the symbiote and with nobody to talk to, Eddie begins to reflect on his actions as Venom and starts second-guessing all the murders they committed. For the first time, Eddie is plagued by feelings of guilt.

Eddie gets broken out of this facility by the surviving symbiote-host-combos created by Life Foundation who seek Eddie’s help on how to communicate with their symbiotes. All of them are struggling to not get overtaken, making Eddie’s mutual relationship with the symbiote seem extraordinary.

Meanwhile the symbiote also breaks out and rushes to find Eddie, bond with him again and, in their worlds, ‘become whole, become Venom’. The symbiote does find Eddie in time to save him from Scream, one of their symbiote ‘daughters’.

But after being reuinited, Eddie tells the symbiote that he needs some time to think on his own to really figure out what of their actions was his choice and what was the symbiote’s. (the cap is from Planet of the Symbiotes which picks this back up.)

Before this storyline goes to its conclusion, Carnage briefly returns and travels over the internet, an ability which the Venom symbiote learns as well in the fight against Carnage. He returns back from San Fran to New York again for this. During this arc Eddie also makes a big mistake and almost kills an innocent man named Clive because he mistook him for being a malicious junkie. (from: Carnage Unleashed)

Then in Planet of the Symbiotes we then return to the break-up story. Eddie’s doubts about his own choices continue on strongly and get reinforced by Spider-Man to a point where Eddie rejects the symbiote. The symbiote, in emotional pain after this temporary break-up begins wailing. This wailing can be heard so far in the galaxy that it actually alerts the other symbiotes to the existence of earth, causing them to begin an invasion.

During this invasion, Eddie’s symbiote returns to him and reveals that for their species, they are considered abnormal because they seek to have a relationship with a host rather than dominate them.

The solution to the invasion is to let out an even more powerful mental scream to overwhelm the symbiotes with despair - Eddie and his symbiote fully bond again to achieve this and thus save earth. This is the arc that the movie presumably took Venom betraying his species for Eddie from.

Then during Sinner Takes All, we meet Anne again! There is a new Sin Eater around and she is being targeted - obviously, Eddie can’t let that happen and sets out to protect her. To heal her injuries, he lets the symbiote bond with her but doing so unleashes violent urges in Anne. She temporarily turns into She-Venom and murders a group of men who were attacking her. Once returning to her senses, Anne is horrified and gets away from Eddie - only to be taken hostage by an assassin who came to take revenge on Eddie for Clive, the person he almost killed during Carnage Unleashed. In the end, Clive himself calls off the manhunt on him, claiming vengeance wouldn’t make him feel any better.

Here continuity gets a little confusing because the next comic, Along Came A Spider, takes place soon after Planet of the Symbiotes and makes reference to Eddie not having talked to Anne since. This is why most continuities place Sinner Takes All before Planet of the Symbiotes, but that doesn’t quite make sense either due to the progression of Eddie’s and the symbiote’s relationship. Ah well, it is a mystery.

Anne is now under police protective custody, but the police also want her help to capture Venom. When Eddie calls, the symbiote travels over the phone-line and partially merges with Anne, which ends up also merging Eddie’s and Anne’s minds. Eddie immediately sets out to find her and retrieve her from the police.

On the way out, Venom gets into a fight with Spider-Man, which gives the police time to arrive and arrest Anne. When Anne calls Eddie from custody, she begs him not to come and bust her out, which he agrees to... but sends the symbiote through the phonelines instead, turning Anne into She-Venom once more.

Once the symbiote is back to Eddie (after some more fighting), Anne announces she wants nothing to do with him anymore because she never wants to get close to the symbiote again. She tells Eddie that only if he resists the symbiote and stops his vengeance quest, she’ll talk to him again.

Then Anne gets tangled up again anyway, as Rune frames Venom for murder and Venom has to save her once more. (from: Rune vs Venom)

Next there is a serial killer on the loose in New York! The police strongly suspect Venom to be the culprit, but it turns out to be Xenophage, eating everyone who has a symbiote inside them. (from: The Hunted)

While running from the police, Eddie temporarily assumes the identity of a skater and joins a group of skater kids under the name Rad Eddie. (from: The Hunted)

Eddie defeats the Xenophage. (still from: The Hunted)

Then comes The Hunger, one of the gayest comics from the 90s for sure. It starts out with Eddie and the symbiote holding hands at the movies. But Eddie once again has reason to suspect that the symbiote is making him more violent.

When Venom winds up actually eating someone’s brain instead of just using this threat as a catchphrase, Eddie is horrified. Seeing that Eddie will refuse any further brain-eating, the symbiote leaves Eddie. Eddie gets captured by Dr. Paine and experimented on.

Eddie finds out that the symbiote needs a chemical that is in brains but can also be supplied in other ways. Before he and the symbiote can fully bond again, Dr. Paine kidnaps the symbiote to also experiment on.

Of course, Eddie saves the symbiote and also finds out that chocolate nourishes his symbiote just as well, so he buys them heartshaped chocolate. (all from: The Hunger)

Then Venom gets pulled into some other dimension along with Wolverine, Scream and the skater kids from before. (from: Tooth and Claw!)

Next, Eddie gets finally captured by the police after all and put on trial. Matt Murdock takes over his defense again. When the prosecution calls Carnage for a witness, Carnage breaks loose and Venom, Daredevil and Spidey have to subdue him. In the end, no verdict ever comes as Eddie is secretly recruited by the Overreach Committee. (from: Venom on Trial)

Eddie is pretty delighted with his new James Bond gig. In License to Kill, we get to see him on a mission in great detail. Important here is that the Committee planted a bomb in Eddie’s chest as an emergency insurance to keep him in check.

Venom’s next mission is to protect a formerly corrupt government leader at a speech in a church. For this, Eddie goes undercover as a nun but instead of using the symbiote’s full shapeshifting abilities, he just takes his normal looks, puts on a nun costume and calls himself Sister Edwina. Iconic. (from: Sign of the Boss)

The next mission is... a pretty big misunderstanding. Eddie’s superiors use convoluted language to tell Eddie to scare Jonah J Jameson a little but Eddie thinks he is meant to kill him. In the subsequent clash with Spidey, Eddie hits his head hard and forgets Spiderman’s civilian identity and also the exact reasons for hating him. (from: The Venom Agenda)

The committee now decides that Eddie is way too much of a loose cannon for their taste and they want to get rid of him. While everyone takes too long to decide who should press the killing button, Eddie escapes the committee, but in the subsequent fighting the symbiote is seemingly killed. (from: The Finale)

Eddie without the symbiote is absolutely miserable and once more pretty suicidal. This is the beginning of an era, however, which makes the symbiote out to largely abuse Eddie. So when the symbiote returns, Eddie initially tries to get away from them to avoid more pain, only to be forcibly united with them again anyway. Venom then goes to visit Carnage and... eats his symbiote. Yeah. (from: Peter Parker: Spider-Man)

Venom then joins and subsequently turns on the Sinister Six. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Eddie finds himself missing Anne and wants to start over with her again. When he visits Anne, she is a paranoid wreck. As Spidey, now in a black Venom-esque costume again, swings by her window, she falls into panic. Eddie misinterprets that Spidey is what scares Anne and goes to fight him, but while he does that, Anne commits suicide. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

As Eddie grieves at Anne’s grave, Senator Ward shows up and steals his symbiote. Eddie gets arrested and sent to prison. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Now we’re entering territory of Venom (2003), the worst Venom comic. I don’t know what the hell is going on here, but the majority of it is about another symbiote anyway. At some point during this Eddie gets his symbiote back and fights the other symbiote.

Proving further that 2003 is the worst Venom year, we go on with a comic where the symbiote eats the adrenaline off people (not even what they ate before) and also with the reveal that Eddie has cancer and his cancer made his adrenaline amounts more appealing to the symbiote. To save Eddie’s life, Peter makes him rebond to the symbiote against either of their will. (from: Spectacular Spider-Man)

Then Carnage has another child which he wants to kill while Venom has other plans for it. (from: Venom/Carnage)

The symbiote gets stolen again during Spider-Man/Red Sonja, but it’s overall not that consequential.

What IS consequential is that Eddie is now back to having moral qualms with the symbiote... so he... decides to auction the symbiote off to super-villains and give the money gained to charity. Without the symbiote, his cancer will advance and he’ll die. (from: Marvel Knights: Spider-Man)

Finding out that the person he sold the suit to kills innocents indiscriminately, Eddie attempts suicide once more. He is taken to the hospital and narrowly survives cutting his wrists open. After that, he is kept in the hospital due to his cancer. (from: Marvel Knights: Spider-Man)

In the hospital, Eddie has reoccuring visions of the symbiote urging him to kill. When he finds out May Parker is in the same hospital, the symbiote tells him to kill her. Eddie does comply with killing a nurse, but stops himself before killing May. He tries to commit suicide once more, only to be saved by Spider-Man. (from: Sensational Spider-Man)

Eddie starts working Martin Li’s homeless shelter, where May Parker also works. A touch by Martin Li, who is actually Mr Negative, heals Eddie’s cancer completely. This also turns Eddie into Anti-Venom - the literal opposite of Venom, a hero who’s touch cures and is harmful to the Venom symbiote. Though Eddie tries to kill his old symbiote, now bonded to Gargan, the symbiote refuses to kill Eddie when Gargan wants it to. Love is a word that is used again. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

Eddie now starts over as a hero as Anti-Venom, healing people and busting drug cartels. (from: Anti-Venom: New Ways to Live)

Eddie is the first one to find out Martin Li is Mr Negative and tries to fight him. He is also the one to reveal Mr Negative’s civilian identity to Spider-Man, temporarily teaming up with him and Wraith to take the crime lord down. (from: Amazing Spider-Man)

At some point here, Eddie offers miracle healings with the Our Lady of Saints church as his headquarters.

When everyone in New York starts developing Spider powers, Eddie heals people from them. In the end, his Anti-Venom powers are all used up in order to large-scale cure the crisis. (from: Spider Island)

Meanwhile the symbiote is bonded to Flash Thompson and the two work as government agents.

Having had enough of symbiotes alltogether, Eddie sets out to kill symbiotes and hosts that are still around. (from: Venom 2011)

Against his will, Eddie is forced to fuse with the Toxin symbiote. (from: Venom 2011)

The FBI recruits Eddie to help them against Carnage. This is the comic that I like to summarize as ‘Let’s Go Lesbians Let’s Go’. In it, Eddie, two latinx lesbians, two black women and some other dude stop Carnage and an elder God. It’s a really good run.

For the first time, a comic makes Eddie accept culpability for his actions as Venom!! Also during this story, he loses the Toxin symbiote. (from: Carnage 2016)

When Flash Thompson and the Venom symbiote are separated, Eddie helps contain the symbiote (which had been going around with a criminal named Lee Price) and then breaks into containment to re-unite with it. Here is where he starts calling the symbiote ‘love’ and ‘darling’ all the time. Sadly there is no real explanation for his change-of-mind on the symbiote. (from: Venom 2016)

The symbiote and Eddie now actively negotiate trust and such in their relationship, it’s very good. When Eddie finds a dinosaur in the sewers, he brings it back to Alchemax which created it. In exchange for bringing the rest of the dinosaurs back, Alchemax chairwoman Liz Allan agrees to study the symbiote to see what is wrong with it, since it appears sick.

During this dinosaur quest Eddie meets and bonds with Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur!

Meanwhile at Alchemax, medicine for the symbiote is created. It turns out that remnants of Anti-Venom in Eddie’s body are making the symbiote sick. (from: Venom 2016)

Theeeeeen Eddie gets pulled into a parallel universe to battle an alien species called Poisons which kills hosts and permanently bonds with symbiotes. (from: Venomverse)

Back on earth, Flash comes to collect the symbiote, which struggles to choose between Flash and Eddie. In the resulting struggle, Flash turns into Anti-Venom instead. Venom, Anti-Venom and Spider-Man team up against Lee Price, who broke out of jail. (from: Venom Inc.)

Then the Poisons return and Eddie has to join the X-Men on a space journey to fight them. (from: Venomized)

At some point in between here, Eddie gets a job at The Facts Channel under the name ‘Mr. Sym’. Later Jonah J Jameson calls him out on how dumb that alias is.

The symbiote is about to spawn again and the FBI wants to interfere with it. Through trickery by Alchemax, Eddie and the symbiote manage to keep their baby. (from: Venom 2016)

The symbiote’s first host returns to earth and wants the symbiote back, who refuses and wants to stay with Eddie. By threatening their child, the first host manages to take the symbiote away anyway. Eddie bonds with the child symbiote, Sleeper, to go get his symbiote back. In the end, Sleeper lobotomizes the first host and uses his body to travel the universe. (from: First Host)

Due to causing way too much trouble, Eddie is now refused entrance to Alechemax. (from: First Host)

Jonah J. Jameson calls Eddie to protect Mary-Jane while Spider-Man faces a crisis with another arch nemesis. To defeat this nemesis, Eddie even lends the symbiote to Spidey. Flash dies in this big fight and Eddie afterwards attends his funeral. (from: Amazing Spider-Man #800)

The symbiote once more acts overtly violent and the resulting struggle in life results in Eddie losing his job at the Facts Channel. (from: Venom 2018)

Eddie Brock kills a god. (from: Venom 2018)

I don’t want to sum that run up any better than that, it is heartbreaking and should simply be read and personally experienced.

If you need issue numbers, this guide is your friend.

#eddie brock #venom #symbrock #is sort of in this #venom comics

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theresnosafeharbor4myships · 6 years ago

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this is the first chapter in a series that takes place during TWD episode 9x16 “The Storm.” It’s somewhat of a continuation of my story “Swept Away,” but you don’t have to read that to follow this (though I obvi think you should :))

Through the Storm - Chapter 1: A Glimmer of Light (also on 9L)

“The cold set in. Fires raged. The rot spread.” – Ezekiel ________________________________________________________

Carol watched the pipes deteriorate, and with them, her marriage.

The fissures steamed with heat and pressure, making wailing sounds of pain, and no amount of tape throttling the cracks seemed to help. They wheezed and hissed, threatening to break and take the life they’d faithfully pumped into the Kingdom for years.

And she sympathized.

Ezekiel tried. He’d coddled and tiptoed, pleaded and pushed, cried and comforted, eventually turning his own grief into a single focal point of compassion—her—hoping to hold on to what they’d had.

Like the pipes that cracked more and more each day though, the tendrils of caring, the desire to continue, the push to move on, the hope of shared comfort only felt like ribbons of tape wrapped too tightly, hoping to prevent the expulsion of what it held.

She felt the pressure building, knew the gasket would eventually blow. Even craved the release from the suffocation of human hands and paltry words that attempted to re-strengthen her.

She didn’t know how much longer she could hold on before bursting into uselessness.

Ezekiel didn’t deserve the inevitable blowout, but no matter how many circles of logic she ran in her head, she knew she was done. They were done.

He remained all he’d ever been: kind, caring, loving, and fanciful. But she…she’d become fire and ice, burning hot with anger and injustice one moment, her heart caving in on itself, leaving her stoic, emotionless, and indolent the next.

He was a Romeo—and she’d become his poison, a sweet concoction muting the bitterness inside until it was too late.

He didn’t see it like that, though whether he couldn’t or simply wouldn’t she couldn’t tell. She just knew they were wrong now. Maybe always had been, but with Henry between them, they’d managed the farce for far longer than she should have allowed.

She loved him well enough. Had spent the past six years as a reluctant right hand to the gentle soul who only desired safety and smiles for his people. He believed they could provide that.

She’d known better. Should have shaken them out of their fantasy, brought them back to this hellish plain, instead of attempting to live in their clouds of fancy. Or should have simply walked away.

Oh, yes, she was bitter. But mainly at herself.

Had she really thought she could love a child into adulthood, watch him grow into a man? Could protect him? Could hold on in a world that ruthlessly, grotesquely forced you to let go, that wrestled your grip away one finger at a time, bruising and breaking as it went? Had she really fooled anyone?

Just herself.

And her king.

And now monsters wearing the faces of the dead had woken her up from the dream that kind of was to find she’d never really been inside of it after all. She’d tiptoed the edge, dipped her foot in the river to test their waters, allowed them to think their fairy tale would outlast the horrors visiting the outskirts of their kingdom, but she’d known all along. She’d straddled the line of waking and dreaming, hoping she could forget for just a while, praying it could mean something different than all the heartbreak before.

She’d realized too late that she’d played the fool, not the queen.

She sighed, staring up into the shadows above the bed, her thoughts too loud, the hurt in her heart too heavy to grant her sleep.

How had it come to this?

Her thoughts floated back through time, over the years of claiming not to be a queen while living as one, the peace she’d felt while others suffered. Past the loss of everyone she’d started out with since that quarry, save one. So many had ripped a piece of her heart out, she now realized she’d had very little to work with, to offer to the husband who loved her more than she would ever love him. Through the evil deeds both done and felt, most of which she’d never spoken of to the people she cared for. Only one now knew her hit list, the people that haunted her dreams even still. And he, so shattered by their collective losses, had taken to living in isolation, which worried and wearied her more than nearly anything else had. Settling on each one of her lost children. The years had been brutal and cruel. So much suffering, things no sane person could see and live to tell of without themselves becoming a monster. The injustice of each loss. The cruelty of motherhood.

An ache gripped her heart so tightly she couldn’t breathe for a moment, only releasing it when she thought she might pass out, and she quietly gasped for air.

She couldn’t pretend any more. She couldn’t convince herself she was in love with a man when only the love of their son had kept them together. Couldn’t pretend to lead people hell-bent on maintaining the innocence and idealism that’d caused her son’s downfall. Couldn’t act like she didn’t have some role in his death as she’d quieted the warrior inside with the fairy tale she thought she could have. Couldn’t live like she knew how to keep a city from falling apart when that’s all she did inside each day, every hour, second by second, cracking and crumbling beneath years of solid wear until she rotted like those pipes.

Who was she anymore? Not a queen, not a mother, not part of the community she oversaw, and no longer wanting to be Ezekiel’s wife. Her roles felt threadbare, like a cherished shirt worn and washed a few too many times, now see-through, thin, and faded, a paltry remnant of the fabric and color it once was.

It was time to throw it away. She couldn’t lose herself, not again.

She’d allowed herself to happily believe it wouldn’t—couldn’t—happen again, not with the fortifications of a community that needed her, problems to fix, a child to raise, and a husband to support.

She’d been wrong. So wrong.

Those things couldn’t stop the dark from creeping into her mind, clouding out all that she’d thought mattered. It didn’t make the ache lessen or the tears dry up or even the fantasy real.

It had all been make-believe.

Her eyes darted to the quote Ezekiel liked, so much so he’d had it painted on his bedroom wall, the one she’d even quoted to him on several occasions.

“At times we crack, only to let the light in.” The ironic crack dividing the words nearly caused a maddening laugh to rise up in her, but she tamped it down.

She’d cracked alright, but no light shown here to brighten up her insides.

In the two weeks since they’d happened upon those stakes, she’d realized her son had provided the light in her life here at the Kingdom; he was the reason she’d stayed all these years. Without him, she no longer fit into the fairy tale illusion everyone else thrived in.

Henry was everywhere and nowhere: in every room, in every person, in all their thoughts, written on their faces, a shadow that stalked her night and day, dredging up not only his absence, but the absence of what she thought she still had.

She couldn’t stay still any longer.

Quietly, so as not to wake Ezekiel, she slipped from the bed and snagged her shoes from their place by the door, glad she hadn’t changed out of her clothes from the day.

She knew he grieved differently than she did, but it grated on her that he could at times still find peaceful rest when it had escaped her nearly her entire life, both before and after the Turn.

A wave of guilt crashed into her as she stuffed her feet inside her shoes and tiptoed through the building. Why should she begrudge him snippets of peace in this hell of a world, from the pain of loss he suffered, from the struggle he faced trying ceaselessly—and lucklessly—to get her to open up to him? What kind of person was she anyway?

She sighed, disgusted with herself, and suddenly felt the cloying darkness around her.

She needed fresh air.

Moving quickly now, she shoved at the front door, springing out into the frigid night air, taking deep breaths through her nose, the cold soothing her burning skin and lungs.

“Carol?”

She swung to her right, her hand instantly at her bare hip as she realized she’d left her knife on the bedside stand.

Daryl stepped out of the shadows into the moonlight, and she relaxed, kept the mask she now wore on a daily basis on the shelf, relieved the voice belonged to him and no one else.

He’d been in and out of the Kingdom the past few weeks, first taking Lydia to the border they’d been given, then helping the fair-attenders return to their communities. More and more she hated watching him leave, fearful he wouldn’t return. The thought of losing him, of becoming unmoored from everything in the past—from the only other person on Earth who was there at the beginning, who’d met the daughter she missed with every beat of her slivered heart, who’d known both of Judith’s parents, who missed the family they’d built through trial and error, who knew a prison could be a home and the lengths they’d go to keep the ones they loved alive—sent an ice-cold terror through her veins.

She hadn’t shared much of her grief with anyone, but she could with him…and had. He’d seen her through this before, had become a stabilizing factor in the world that never ceased tilting off its axis. There was very little they didn’t share with one another after all this time, and her heart burgeoned with gratitude that he’d chosen to come back here after ensuring the community groups made it home safely.

She knew it was for safety, yes. But she also knew he wouldn’t leave her until he knew she’d come through the darkness. It was his way, had become their way through the many goodbyes fate had forced them to say. The gravitational pull they had always felt strongest when the other threatened to spiral out of control.

Guilt came again, that she couldn’t share her sorrow with Ezekiel, who’d also lost his child, but she brushed it away for the moment, basking in the comfort of her closest friend, the one presence that didn’t invade or push but merely supported and had only ever unconditionally loved.

Nearly overcome with her warring emotions, she focused on the man before her. Shaggy hair she’d recently trimmed—she hadn’t realized how much she’d missed him, missed his unassuming nature, his quiet loyalty and rough edges, until she’d visited him with Henry—broad shoulders carrying his ever-present crossbow, solid stance that had supported her far more times that anyone else knew.

“You okay?”

She swallowed hard, unable to pretend with him, not wanting to lie. “I’m trying to be.”

He moved toward her. “Where’s your coat? ‘S freezing out here.”

“I…it’s…” She motioned back towards the building as he set his bow down on the steps and shrugged out of his own jacket. “Daryl…” She meant to protest, but his name on her lips sounded more like a sigh, and she couldn’t think clearly. All she knew, all she felt, was relief. Relief that she didn’t have to fight alone, that she didn’t have to keep up appearances for people who’d suffered, yes, but had peacefully lived behind the safety of walls since the beginning. Didn’t have to hide behind her own walls or pretend she belonged or that she was working through her grief instead of it taking her over. Didn’t have to wonder who she was around him or how to act or what to say. She could be silent and still or rant and rave or fall in a sopping mess or fume with fire and he would stay. Stay with her and by her and for her and let her work through the mess of life with silence and support and remind her of who she was and could be.

She needed him here.

Daryl slung the jacket around her shoulders and rubbed her arms, transferring his warmth into her cold limbs and freezing heart. She stared up at him in wonder, the moonlight falling behind him, casting his face in shadow. But she didn’t need the light to know the contours of his face, the lines of scars he hid beneath his hair, the tired, squinty eyes and high cheekbones, the mole on the left side of his face, the scruff that circled his mouth, his strong jawline. She knew the comfort of the arms that would catch her—had caught her—when she fell. And had helped right her again.

How could a person feel like home? His arms a sanctuary? His presence a balm? His friendship more important than any other relationship she’d ever had next to those with her children?

How could she get through this without him?

His hands slowed their movements, and he gently gripped her biceps. “You warm enough?”

She swallowed hard, past the realization that she’d always had a home where he was, that the kingdom felt more like a cage without Henry. That only one place lent light to the darkness inside her.

Staring up at him, she felt the first glimmer of warmth ease into the cracks in her soul.

At times we crack, only to let the light in, she thought.

“Yeah,” she answered softly, resolutely.

“Wanna sit down?” Daryl gestured toward the gazebo in the courtyard where a few blankets lay rumpled on the bench and his lantern sat, casting off a soft glow.

She needed to. Her world had just shifted, and she felt off-kilter, unsure of what lay ahead but desperate for warmth.

She nodded, and he slipped his arm around her shoulders, mooring her to his side as they walked toward the light.

#caryl #carol x daryl #daryl x carol #caryl fanfiction #caryl fanfic #my writing #personal #through the storm

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maximumflapshoesoul-blog · 6 years ago

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My nightmare neighbour

I really do live next door to a nightmare neighbour and for a year now she has stressed me out so much that i just want to scream. But instead of screaming i thought i would vent my frustrations by typing daily events in hope that putting it out there would ease my soul in someway. So here goes..it all started last summer with my son who was 11 at the time playing football in our own back garden with a friend of his. My son came upstairs to me saying next door wanted to speak to me. So i went down stairs and through to the back garden to see what she wanted..to my horror she started screaming at me about the kids playing and offering me a fight out on the front then she threatened me with a machete. I just got the kids in and shut the backdoor and took myself back upstairs. About 30 mins later the police arrived at my house as she had reported me. I explained to the police what had gone off and they were more than happy with my explaination as my neighbour is well known to the police for causing drama so the officer that came to see me said.

I really dont understand where all this had come from because before this i use to deliver parcels locally and often delivered to my neighbour and we use to chat.

On a daily basis me and my partner would hear her f..ing and blinding at her kids but turned a blind eye as we can all shout at our children but she was just exteme with it.

About a week after the first incident there was another knock at the door..this time it was the council police..a complaint had been put in about bedroom noise 😁 wow so now she wasnt just satisfied with controlling my son playing in his own back garden but now wants to control our sex lives 😂😂 obviously the council police left happy and nothing else was done about it.

I just want to say that my partner owns her own house outright so we are not council tenants so i really dont know what she was trying to achieve!!

For several months there was no more confrontations and no more knocks of the door from the council or police so thought she had just turned her attentions on to somebody else after realising she wasnt getting anywhere with us. Even though she still carried on shouting awful things to her kids (she shouted that loud you could hear word for word what she was saying) banging and slamming doors loud..tv on all night loudly or because of the type of person she is it wouldnt surprise me she put her tv right up to our bedroom wall..drilling before 7am on a daily basis..mowing her lawn before 7am..dragging her wheelie bin down her steps at 6.20 am followed by her gate then her door slamming. We knew she was just trying to get a rise out of us but we carried on ignoring her antics. Even though it was frustrating.

One morning in march i believe it to be the 12th me and my son was getting in my car as we usually would at 6.45 so i could get to work and my son to school. Before i got in the car i but our bin out as it was bin day. The next minute i heard her front door slam so i turned round and saw she was putting her bin out. I was minding my own business when i looked again she was stood at her back gate in her dressing gown with her arms folded just staring at me..i put my window down in my car shrugged my shoulders and asked what was her problem..with that she started screaming and shouting at me in a threatening way so i just put my window back up and drove off..she was obviously looking for an argument but i was not doing this in front of my child (she can scream and shout all she likes in front of her kids but not mine!).

When i got home from work that evening i phoned 101 and reported it to the police..the officer who came to see me previously rang me back and asked me if i wanted him to go and see her to which i said no but please just log it incase anything else happens.

Things on the confrontations side died down again but all the noises from her house didnt but yet again we just ignored her as we couldnt be bothered with her childish ways.

About a month later after the 12th March incident i recieved a phone call from social services..it had been reported to the NSPCC that my son was being battered in our home by me or my partner..obviously i was upset and angry that someone would do this..the social worker arranged to come and see me and my son so she could talk to us the very next day. The social worker was really nice..she spoke to me and my son separately and could see he was far from a battered child..she did then say she needed to speak to his school as thats just something they do. I wasnt worried about this as i know my son is doing very well at school..top groups for all subjects and he is in his school football team. About a week later i got a call from the social worker saying the case was closed and they are happy my son isn't coming to any harm. They said it was obviously malicious as they was a couple of referrals one was the 12th March (coincidence i think not) and another for January where the police were suppose to be involved..police had no record of it and they wouldnt because it never happened..also he was being battered on a daily basis..anyway if another referral goes through the person making the allegations will be investigated. So i hope she does as that might be her downfall!

Last week me and my son was coming home at about 6.30 pm..there was 4 children outside my neighbours house..i know one to be her daughter but was unsure who the others was..before we approached the kids started shouting stuff at us..i mean for god sake they must all be 10 and under..me and my son didnt say a word as we are not lowering ourselves to that level and carried on walking to our front door..as i unlocked the front door i noticed she was stood there arms folded staring i ignored her and carried on going in tp my house where the she shouted 'why you starting on the kids'..i just shut the door and carried on with my business.

The next day i got a knock at the door..it was the police again..sigh..she reported me..i couldnt believe it..me and my son had done and said nothing..she told the police im battering my son so that confirms she is the one who is making the allegations..i always start on her kids..please im a 43 year old woman who doesnt even really shout at my own child..apparently i also follow her daughter and friend on the park and just stand and stare at them..i havent been on a park for years ever since my son was small..its all ridiculous and its really winding me up but there is nothing i can do but sit back and pray that she gets her comeuppance one day.

I feel a little bit better for getting it all out of my head and now im going to start typing as things happen.

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shivershill2 · 3 years ago

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I will not discuss this with ladlestans. Read what is written under this tag. There is even another one who writes about this, very informative. You could read any of this, or you could ignore it and continue to push you agenda of 'Ladle did nothing wrong uwu. She is only an innocent precious bean, forced to go into a war against the mean church uwu'

So I don't know how active people are looking at this but I def have a questions at people who dislike her enough for this to exist.

1. Is there a subreddit?

2. The more important one.

So the thing is. I am planning to make something and I made a few character. I got Inessa, Seteths second daughter, Ayla, Claudes daughter, Coenrad as Dimitris son and Eckhard as Huberts son.

It plays out in heroes, so they all can exist together.

Eckhard is written as a young man who hates his 'leader' and father. (Byleth is not supported to anyone and left in regret, not being seen by anyone ever again.) Both of them the reason his older sister and mother, both he loved dearly were murdered. Eckhard has met the cast of Heroes(who are now older, Alfonse as the next king, with the summoner as his partner[yes I am a Kiralfonse slut, fight me] and their two children Christel and Mikael) and always wanted to leave his world for another 3H world.

Eckhard is the reason Ladle gets assassinated and leaves his wounded father behind, escaping to Askr, asking to move into a world he would be more welcome than the actual tyrannical shit he has to face.

He was able to group up a bunch of people behind his fathers back, as he was able to keep quite, mask his own planes behind being interested in his policing the citizens and enforcing his and ladles beliefs on those that do not follow her.

With the approval of Dimitri, Claude and Byleth, he joins their world, living under Dimitri and his family, ending up as Coenrad closest friend and right hand. A proud member of the blue lions and even starts to write about the goddess, praying to her on daily basis. Complete opposite of what he was taught as a child. Without his cursed last name, he finally can live in peace, find friends, without them being scared of who he is and who his father is. At the beginning he faced a lot of scepticism, but proves to be the opposite of what his father was.

So the thing is, I had not planned for Eckhard and Coenrad to end up together, but it just happened naturally for me and I was thinking about something.

I have added a whole ass group into my story, a beast tribe living hidden inside the forests. Most of them were hunted for sports by ladles people and she was the last survivor, who escaped into the safe hands of the monastery. She would join the blue lions, and I thought if she was in the game she could never be recruited into BE. At first I thought, she would start out as a BE student, but would leave to BL no matter what you do. She would be recruitable in SD, but her loyalty lies with the BL crew.

I really like Claudelth and Dimileth, but I was thinking, what would be worse for both Ladle and her loyal henchmen?

Eckhard, who is the cause for ladles downfall being together with either:

Dimitris and Byleth son, the one person Ladle hates (not me most because her racist ass hates the dragons and inhumans more) and loved the most. The one she could not have, that left her alone, even abandoned her in regret.

Dimitris and Calanthes(my beast unit) son, the son of the man he hates and ' a beast, a monster who mask themselves as a human', a woman who was hunted as a child, tail cut off for provit. Her life spared by her mothers and another member of her tribes sacrifice.

#anti edelgard

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theemichelleb · 5 years ago

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Black Love is Timeless

Nothing.

In this world.

Is more beautiful.

Than Black Love.

Let’s start with the fulfilling fantasies of walking down an isle one day to say “I Do” to the person of your dreams. Then fast forward to the daydreams of becoming so emotionally and spiritually intertwined with somebody that you fall in love and spend the rest of your life with them. Everybody wants it, honestly everybody needs it… so why’s it so hard to get to? Our expectations are built on fantasy instead of reality…

Don’t get me wrong… the man that holds the door for you, helps you out of the car, cooks dinner, does the dishes, and walks on the side of the sidewalk closest to traffic does exist. And no… it’s not only the men from the south that practice what’s often known as southern hospitality. They do pursue you and make you their priority when they know what they want and are at that point in their life. Some men… never get to that point.

There are so many debates going on about how race isn’t everything and how dating preferences are wrong (love is love), but they aren’t. They are a part of life, a larger part being… only a black man can love me the way I can love him. I have nothing against men of any other race, I look at and admire them from time to time just the same, but there’s just something about a dark chocolate man that gets my twists in a whirl.

Live your life in the reality of black love instead of in the fantasy of it. Love is complicated and comes with so much more than just itself. I am a culprit of creating these fantasies based off of a reality of “potential”. I’ve also been a culprit of remaining in a relationship because I am a woman of my word and if I say I love you and I’m willing to fight for us, that means staying through thick and thin. What I have come to learn in my late 20s is Love is just that… and then comes the rest. Allowing somebody to terrorize my heart, mind, and spirit because I pray they’d one day cherish what we have, the way I do, is the fantasy. Allowing myself to walk away and rebuild my mind, body and spirit from something that was not created for me, is reality.

Men are not evil… yes, there are some men that are malicious and will waste your time if you let them, but that is not the basis of man; and while I’m on that, there are some women that are just as malicious and manipulative as men are painted to be. We have to stop the negative commentary that black men ain’t -ish and black women are mean, nasty, and too much to deal with. That narrative is created as a tactic to prevent us from loving one another and building black families and powerhouses that will compete with the privileged that are currently running the world.

The black love era that we have entered is so amazingly beautiful and deserves to be celebrated!

As I get older, I notice things change and the only reason I know the stories are changing with my age and not with circumstances is because of younger sisters I have taxed with the same nonsense I once experienced at their age. The talk around black love, black fathers supporting their families, and black women supporting their men is 10 times different at 27 than it was at 21 and I’m truthfully thankful of that. Black love is so amazing, uplifting, inspirational, D.O.P.E., and creates a safe haven for me and the dreams that I had at a young age to find a love sculpted just for me.

I think it’s really amazing how energies work to connect us to new people, things, ideas, and movements. When I began to move into a space of peace and happiness while I was single and becoming more and more comfortable in my skin the way God made me, romance began to sprinkle itself into my purview, and the scope of the black love movement really opened up to me. I found it being placed onto my social media timelines, was introduced to new people and couples to follow to witness their experiences, and I noticed the chatter and talk of black love developing for my friends and family more than it had been before. All stemming from a peace and increase in the love I had for myself and my sister friends that surround me daily.

The more I find comfort in being out of my comfort zone my desire’s of marriage and family increase. I want to have kids and share a life with the one man God has molded for me to grow old and experience life with. It’s a blessing to have such amazing role models on what black love and marriage can be and how it can come along to help me acknowledge and accept it when it presents itself to me.

I have to admit I have developed quite the marriage crush on Khadeen and Devale Ellis, but I truly can’t help it, they’re so inspirational and attractive… the family is really gorgeous, LOL. Seeing them live their best lives and then take the time out to share their blessing with us is so beautiful to me. They change the narrative of love for me from being this fairy tale that only some get, to this realistic and attainable goal that is available for any of us. There is a man out there that will pick on you, make fun of you, lift you up, support and encourage you the way Devale does for Khadeen… THAT alone is powerful.

Black women fall into thoughts that we aren’t good enough for something that beautiful and amazing because we often come into contact with men that are not equally yolked with us, and when those ties break we feel we’ve lost a piece of ourselves because it didn’t make us feel all the “good” things we expected; which turns into self doubt and self shaming. A man will not tear down his queen or leave her feeling less than, and that’s, that hands down. I know of the downfalls of failed relationship after failed relationship because I’ve been there. I’ve given my all to something that I thought was greater than me but only turned out to be a placeholder, but after growing from those things I have developed the courage to accept life for what it is and continue to move on.

Every man is not destined to be your Prince Charming… one more time, every man is not destines to be your Prince Charming.

I believe there is one man out there destined to uplift me as the Queen God blessed me to be, and I do not agree with the microwavable generation that thinks marriage is a revolving door. It takes patience, hard work, dedication, communication, and honesty to make a relationship work and I’ve never been married so I won’t preach on how to sustain a healthy marriage, but I can give my insight on why I feel marriages these days don’t last. People get too caught up in the fantasy and don’t accept the reality that Love comes with fights, disagreements, moments that aren’t so pretty, and moments where you will feel less than. The difference between your fantasy being broken and experiencing reality, is if you’re abandoned at that less than feeling. When somebody respects you enough to not walk away from the ugly things that appear in a relationship and won’t leave you feeling less than, indefinitely, recognize the blessing you have.

There is the boy that will let you think you were everything wrong with the relationship and then there is the man that will make sure you know neither of you is perfect and you both ALWAYS have things you can improve on. Don’t stick with boy because you have to prove him wrong and be right… wait for the man that will help you be better which is more important than being right. Earn the love you seek by being compatible to the man you desire.

And please, please, please don’t turn into the woman that thinks “since he didn’t love me, nobody will.” That’s not true unless you make it true and words are powerful, you have to speak what you want to manifest in real life, and that ain’t it sweetie. Black love really is timeless so don’t give up on it.

Be D.O.P.E. black girl!

#love #black love #marriage #self love

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d1find · 6 years ago

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FAHM18 - October 29, Guinivir Lopez

Meet Guinivir Lopez, a Freshman at Northeastern University. Guinivir is from Brooklyn/Staten Island, NY; her upbringing was influenced by Filipino culture.

What do you think is the most common misconception about being Filipino?

I think the most common misconception about being Filipino is that our country is too poor and only has beaches. I'm very happy to see that this misconception, however, is slowly changing as people are finally travelling to our islands and seeing the other beauties and abundances that we have to offer. I think another is that we're neither Asian or Pacific-Islander and that we're all REALLY GOOD singers. Though I gotta admit that we actually do have some really outstanding singers out there.

How did you become aware of your cultural identity?

I was always aware of my cultural identity as I was growing up. I was raised by my grandmother and mother who both immigrated to America from the City of Ligao and they both received help from the Filipinos who immigrated here before them. I grew up attending Filipino holiday parties, where I met Lolos and Lolas, Titos and Titas, and Kuyas, all who were not related to me by blood, learning the popular line dances, and eating our cuisine on a daily basis. Every time I was asked for my ethnicity, I always said I was Filipino without a thought. It's just something that's ingrained in me even if I can't speak our language.

How much do you identify with the history of the Philippines?

I've never heard too much about our history, other than all the invasions and wars, while I was growing up. The Philippines was never really discussed in history or global classes. However, I did learn a lot recently about it through the NU Barkada's Roots GM. I learned that women in the Philippines were strong and respected and at many times, they were able to take power. Many were even given the positions of high power as priestesses. Even without learning about this, I can identify with this part of our history since I was raised by two incredible women who passed their strong and independent personalities to me.

Is religion important in your household? Describe a situation illustrating why or why not:

Religion was really important in my childhood as I was growing up more than it is now. I attended CCD classes and received all my rites on time. Every Sunday, my grandmother would wake us up early to have a big breakfast but we would never be allowed to eat until we prayed. Our prayers included saying Grace then reading a small passage from the Bible from which she'd tell me to analyze and find the lesson from it. Sometimes I'd be stuck staring at my food for an hour trying to comprehend the lesson. She also stressed the importance of looking our best at church. Although religion is not that stressed anymore in my immediate household with my mom and dad, I still pray at night and try to attend mass on Sundays.

Have you ever struggled with your racial/ethnic/cultural identity? Describe this struggle and how you overcame it:

I wouldn't really say that I've struggled with my identity since I've personally been on equal terms with it since the beginning but there was this one occurrence where my family and I were discriminated against in public. I've tried to put it behind me but on this one winter Sunday afternoon, we were leaving church mass and heading to the car. We had parked on a street parking rather than in the parking lot and that morning we had some snow flurries, the ones that don't really stick. Near our car, we started taking snow and throwing it in the air to rain on ourselves like just some fluff and for fun and an old white man came out of his house near where we had parked and started yelling at us about being inconsiderate people. He yelled words and phrases like, "foreigners," "Chinese", "go back to where you came," "you don't belong here," and he told us to clean the mess we made which was already melting. My dad yelled back at him, "First off, we're Filipinos. We're from the Philippines. Get your facts right." If people are going to hate at others, at least hate at them for the right reason. I'm Filipino, not just any Asian. I was born in America, a Filipino-American.

What are you most proud of as a Filipino/Filipino-American?

I'm extremely proud of how hard-working but happy and out-going we are. Whenever I go to group events, who's the loudest? Oh yeah, it's us. Whenever I meet new people, they always ask now: are you Filipino? "Oh hell yeah I am" and they'd start talking with excitement about how they love how friendly Filipinos are. Especially with productions or events, we may procrastinate a lot but the outcome always comes out bomb because of everyone's hard work. We just like to have fun and to laugh and I believe that we all live our best lives because of it.

What challenges did you face, growing up as a Filipino/Filipino-American?

On a light note, Filipino time. You just can't help but be late! On a heavier note, I've had to face the challenge of the #1 downfall about being Filipino. Gossip. I wasn't exactly born into the best of situations and my parents belonged to two different Filipino communities. I was raised and surrounded by only one of them. They raised me, taught me discipline and greatly contributed to the me that I am today. Many years later, I was introduced into the other community and it was hard to find myself being accepted into theirs. Everyone had already knew who I was even before I had introduced myself. They were all excited to meet me and whenever someone didn't know who I was, they would start going off on practically my whole birth story. Everyone had already knew about the circumstances I was born in, before my mother and grandmother explained it to me in detail and before I was at an age where I completely understood it. It was scary because I heard so many different versions about what happened and at some point, it became hard to figure out what was the real truth. Everything about me just spread and I never said a word. It ended up being really bad and I wound up finding that it was hard to walk into any place because I had grown a fear of hearing voices talking about me and saying things about myself that I didn't even know. When I'd greet people and they'd ask how I was doing, I always felt like I was suffocating because dark thoughts about them wanting to spread it around frightened me. It took me a while, but I eventually overcame this fear as I grew more mature and independent and I've made it an oath to myself to try not to involve myself in any rumors, be it of myself or of other people. I've learned that words aren't the only things that define us and we shouldn't let it define us or make us run from ourselves either.

Have you ever visited the Philippines? Tell a story or favorite memory from your visit!

I visited the Philippines around when I was 6 or 7 during the Christmas and New Year Holidays. I was there for what feels like a month, living the most relaxing and fun life I could, skipping school from halfway across the world. My town had a festival one night and my mother brought me out to enjoy the arcades, letting me play for a round. In that one round my mother let me play, I won and was able to pick a prize. I chose a gigantic bottle of soda. I brought it back home to my family so I could share with them and tell the story of how I won. Later in the night, my mother brought me out to the side of the house where some of our younger relatives were gathered. They had bought firecrackers and we lit them all night. There were hand held firecrackers and my most favorite one of them all was in the shape of a pyramid. My uncles lit the top and out came pretty firework lights, spilling out like lava. The lights from back then are still vivid in my mind and when I think about the Philippines, I always remember the joy and brightness from that night.

What do you feel most grateful for in your life?

I'm most grateful for the loving and fun people that I've been surrounded with, both my friends and my family. They've really supported me and it's because I have them that I believe that I'm living my best life. They're always there for laughs, for food and for rants and advice.

Tell us about someone who has had a big influence in your life:

My mother has had a really big influence in my life. She's the #1 consistent thing that's been in my life and she understands me even when I speak gibberish or just make groaning noises. She's been tough with me but she's also spoiled me and all my love for cute things, I get from her. I really love and am grateful her and for all that she's sacrificed for me and I honestly don't know if I can function well without her. Maybe I can since I'm doing pretty well dorming right now but it's only been 2 months and I've went to her for practically every little thing I don't know about. I love you Mommy <3

Describe the happiest moment of your life:

I've honestly had way too many happy moments to figure out which one was the happiest moment of my life but I guarantee that all of my happiest moments involved other people and having fun. If I had to choose one, it would be the first time I performed with a Filipino club. It was at my high school, Staten Island Technical High School and I was chosen to wear the Baro't Saya for the fashion show before we performed. I don't think I was ever as proud of being a Filipino as I was that night with the spotlight on me in front of a sea of people as the MC explained both my partner's Barong Tagalog and my dress.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

I see myself.... still being a short Filipino. I'll be working in a hospital pharmacy and I'll still be surrounded by the loving people I'm surrounded with today. I can't say for sure that I'll have kids 10 years from now but if I happen to have them by that time already, then I hope I'll be making them Filipino food for dinner that night.

Describe your immediate/household family:

There's my mom, my dad, and my little brother who's 7 years old.Do you have any stories involving your older/deceased ancestors?

Describe an extended family member you are most attached to and the relationship you have with him/her:

An extended family member that I am most attached to is my Lolo Rod, a Filipino who helped my grandmother when she first came to the States. He was the father figure in my life as I was growing up. He was the tallest Filipino I ever met and he danced with me many times, mostly because I dragged him out onto the dance floor all the time. He would often come to our house and whenever he'd brush his teeth, I would pop in and ask him about why he took out his teeth to brush them. Whenever he came, he always came with his wife Lola Offie and she would make us Beef Tapa. To this day, I still keep him dear in my heart and I remember him most on Valentine's Day to commemorate his death.

Is having a knowledge of family history important? Why or why not?

I believe it is important to have a knowledge of family history, even if it doesn't go that far back. I believe everyone has a right to have their stories passed down through the generations and I believe that it also can be a defining feature of someone's identity as it is in mine.

#FAHM

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