#i pinky promise im doing everything in my power to get better but im not getting better and its okay to accept that | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dotnscal · 1 year ago

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ignore this please. its the madness. shield thine eyes. its just fun for me to write these things down.

this is about to be so scary. all of my mental illness has been poured out

romangerri absent from much of this bc i dont have the mental capacity to think about them without boom. my head explodes.

the complexity of this is that kenstewy exists in a multiverse for me. like. there are 60 kenstewy universes existing in my head and i make no effort to differentiate them

anyways. selections from...

fearless (tv)

PEOPLE WILL HATE. PEOPLE WILL HATE FOR THIS........ but i had 1/3 of a celsius the other day and positively lost my mind listening to you belong with me imagining. the cheesiest kenstewy predicament. you know the one. it was insane. but wonderful

speak now (tv)

back to december..... yea its gonna be another kenstewy bullshit im sorry... im sorry.... just the hows life / tell me hows your family.... it feels like them.... then ithink about summer all the beautiful times / i watched you laughing from the passenger side / and realized i loved you in the faaaaall.... yea. yea

ours ... honorable kenstewy mention.... i lose it after the first verse but the first verse is like. lowkey them. sorry.

foolish one.......... i know its cheesy but... kenstewy pining....

you are not... the exception... you will never LEARN YOUR LESSON!!!!!!

you know how to keep me waiting / i know how to act like i’m fine / don’t know what to call this situation / but i know i can’t call you mine

cause when my head is on your shoulder / it starts thinking you’ll come around

cause you got her on your arm / and me in the wings / i’ll get your longing glances / BUT SHE’LL GET YOUR RING (!)

i can see you. honestly in my heart this is solidly a romangerri song.but i also think its sexy slay office romance business sex vibe. so it can really be utilized anywhere and everywhere <3 versatile queen

castles crumbling. if i think about this song too mcuh re: succession i will genuinely make myself sick and vomit.

power went to my head and i couldnt stop / ones i loved tried to help so i ran them offffff / and here i sit alone behind walls of regret / falling down like promises that i never kept

my foes and friends watch my reign end i dont know how it couldve ended this way..........

now theyre screaming at the palace front gates used to chant my name now they’re screaming that they hate... me......... never wanted you to hate me....

red (tv)

state of grace ACOUSTIC. VERSION. i have no fucking evidence for this and no clear reasons but the ambience. the feel of it. is very...... kenstewy.

girls with daddy issues know that better man is not about a romantic relationship its actually about daddy issues when you see it with the daddy issues third eye. so.

on that note. the moment i knew can also be applied to daddy issues imo. i do this activity on a regular basis. and one day i thought about shiv bday or some fancy thing that logan did not attend (only one instance of this tho bc she is pinky <3) and it made me want to vomit and also die.

red kenstewy ill die on this hill

1989

I KNOW PLACES. insanely kenstewy song idk man cant elaborate

sometimes i listen to clean and its like slay kendall bc obviously. when i was drowning thats when i could finally breathe. but also everything other than that line is far too fucking positive to be a kendall song in my heart

you are in love. stfu kenstewy it physically hurts me to listen to it.

ONE NIGHT. HE WAKES. STRANGE LOOK. ON HIS FACE. PAUSES. THEN SAYS. YOURE MY. BEST FRIEND. AND YOU KNEW. WHAT IT WAS. HE IS. IN LOVE.

reputation

look what you made me do this is. this is silly talk. but its so kendall. the drama of it. MY FATHER IS A MALIGNANT PRESENCE ERA. the old kendall cant come to the phone right now.

i dont like your kingdom keys / they once belonged to me / you asked me for a place to sleep / locked me out. then threw a feast WHAT?!!? (thinking about it... this is also giving tomshiv a little hehe... shivorce....he did lock her out and throw a feast kinda)....

READY FOR IT IS ALSO KENDALL REP ERA. PLEASE IF YOU HAVE SEEN THE READY FOR IT KENDALL ROY EDIT WHERE IT OPENS W READY FOR IT AND WHEN SHE SINGS ‘KNEW HE WAS A KILLER’ IT FLASHES WITH K L R. PLEASE. PLEASE. IVE LOST IT AND I NEED IT. BADLY.

dont blame me kenstewy no i wont speak on it just the aura and vibes. my drug is my baby but also cocaine :o

dancing with our hands tied is simultaneously tomshiv (early tho. pre shivorce era) and kenstewy (i’m a mess but i’m the mess that you wanted).... i. I LOVED YOU IN SECRET

you said there was nothing in the world that could stop it / i had a bad feeling.

dress. you know. you know who this one is about. (let siobhan roy be horny). actually looking at thelyrics right now im also feeling some. shall we say. kenstewy mental illness seeping in (i dont want you like a best friend.... WHAT THA FREAK???)

getaway car honestly any fucking relationship in this show bc theyre always fucking around on each other!!!! theyre always up to shady shit!!! DONT PRETEND ITS SUCH A MYSTERY THINK ABOUT THE PLACE WHERE YOU FIRST MET ME (waystar royco)

so it goes... yea i cant comment it just fits everyone and everything but to me it will always be early tomshiv

lover

the man...... like cringe obviously ew cringe cringe. one time i said this to my sister and she said ‘thats because you havent experienced sexism.’ well now i have and im sorry but if i like to listen to the man and feel strongly about shiv roy i can do what i want and fuck you!!

false god cough cough kenstewy. no elaboration at this time.

unfortunately they are all the archer to me. all of them every last one. it oscillates depending on the line sometimes.

i cut off my nose just to spite my face / and i hate my reflection / for years and years.......

cause all of my enemies started out friends... coughcough romangerri coughcough shivorce....

WHO COULD EVER LEAVE ME DARLING... BUT WHO COULD STAY....

folklore

august. AUGUST. its kenstewy 20 year situationship to the fucking max.... early days... harvard days....... stfu i know they were summering in the hamptons and LIVING THIS SONG

whispers / of “are you sure?” / “never have i ever before” ..... stfu

wanting was enough / for me it was enough / to live for the hope of it all / cancel plans just in case you’d call

SO MUCH FOR SUMMER LOVE AND SAYING US CAUSE YOU WERENT MIIIIIINE TO LOOOSE

illicit affairs.... im not saying it im not saying it im not saying it NO! NO! GOD NO! (kenstewy affair era) NOOOO NOBODY SAID THAT

hoax........... another daddy issues song to me......... but also shivorce..... it contains multitudes....

peace. to me peace is like. tomshiv before they had very obvious and insurmountable issues and when they maybe liked each other. i feel that shiv has a very (repressed) desire to love and be loved and just kind of cant do it but like.... in her heart she wanted them to work but also.... they did not <3 oh baby they did not <3

exile.... yea its gonna be the shivorce yea yea yea who was shocked. who was surprised.

seven you already know where its going.

i’ve been meaning to tell you / i think your house is haunted / your dad is always mad and that must be why / and i think you should come live with me / and we can be pirates / then you won’t have to cry / or hide in the closet

knife to my fucking gut aside.... oh baby is he (kendall) hiding in the closet :P (im so silly)

my tears ricochet giving daddy issues sorry.

i didnt have it in myself to go with grace / ‘cause when i’d fight you used to tell me i was brave

you had to kill me but it killed you just the same / cursing my name / wishing i stayed / you turned into your worst fears

not even gonna take a crack at this is me trying. figure it out for yourselves i cant open that can of worms.

the 1 i wont say it (kenstewy)

mad woman... shivvy. honey. were gonna get you out of here. ITS OBVIOUS THAT WANTING ME DEAD HAS REALLY BROUGHT YOU TWO TOGETHER.

evermore

many people have said to me (no people have said this) olivia. if illicit affairs is giving kenstewy affair for you. what about ivy. i cant really speak on it but it just doesnt give the same effect. it doesnt fit them to me. idk.

coney island SHIVORCE. ANTHEM.

did i close my fist around something delicate? / did i shatter you? yup. yup.

champagne problems i do not feel particularly strongly about actually in relation to succession ( i feel very strongly about it in my every day life ) but. she wouldve made such a lovely bride what a shame shes fucked in the head.

now the daddy issues sufferers will once again recognize that tolerate it is also a song about daddy issues.

“i notice everything you do or dont do / youre so much older and wiser and i / wait by the door like im just a kid / use my best colors for your portrait” yea yea

“i made you my temple my mural my sky / now im begging for footnotes in the story of your life / drawing hearts in the by line / always taking up too much space or time”

midnights

one time i was listening to anti hero and was like haha its kind of kendall bc its so dramatic and shit but then i was like. there are very few circumstances where he would admit to being the problem.

ok sorry. sorry i know i said coney island shivorce anthem but MIDNIGHT RAIN. SHIVORCE ANTHEM.

i broke his heart cause he was nice (STFU) / HE WAS SUNSHINE I WAS MIDNIGHT RAIN / HE WANTED IT COMFORTABLE I WANTED THAT PAIN / HE WANTED A BRIDE I WAS MAKING MY OWN NAME (!!!!!) / CHASING THAT FAME

havent thought in depth about this one but. maroon. tomshiv. boom

labyrinth is SO early tomshiv that it hurts. shiv liking tom and being like. fuck what the fuck what the fuck. no.

great war everybody because everybody fucks each other up in multiple ways. they are all always having great wars.

mastermind is also astronomically tomshiv. they are both mastermind and mastermind is them but particularly shiv.

no one wanted to play with me as a little kid / so ive been scheming like a criminal ever since / to make them love me and make it seem effortless / this is the first time i felt the need to confess

hits different so fucking embarrassingly kenstewy its EMBARRASSING. how kenstewy it is to my heart.

i pictured you with other girls / in looooove / then threw up on the street. (tell me that is not young kenstewy)

MOVING ON WAS ALWAYS EASY FOR ME TO DO. IT HITS DIFFERENT. IT HITS DIFFERENT CAUSE ITS YOU.

wouldve. couldve. shouldve. need i say.... shivorce. and it goes BOTH WAYS. particularly first verse and the bridge

if you tasted poison you couldve / spit me out at the first chance

living for the thrill of hitting you where it hurts / give me back my girlhood it was mine first

ok so sorry about this. i think im done now ( for now evil laugh). i think this was good for me. i do not have many fellow succession enjoyers in real life and do not wish to floor those who i am acquainted with. so i needed to write this down and throw it out here to drift away in the waters of oblivion.

cant believe taylor swift wrote so many songs about succession....

#i need help.#normal people make playlists #evil people do this.

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oh-for-fic-sake · 4 years ago

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Love Is Blind

Masterlist

Summary: The time has come to reveal your and Henry's relationship to your brothers, simple right? Well it would be if your wasn't the baby sister to the infamous Shelby brothers.

Warnings: RPF, Swearing, Slight Angst, Fluff, Confrontation, Implied Violence

A/N: so here is the Peaky Blinders AU that i started a few days ago, Im really happy with this and had a lot of fun with it. But please excuse the typo's

Taglist: in reblogs

You looked around the road eyes wide ,watching the passers by. The peaky blinders were everywhere... this was always a risk, not to mention you wasn't entirely sure where each of your brothers were. Or aunt Polly you only knew that Ava was off with her lover Fred. And you were doing much of the same... Well not Fred but Henry, your own lover. You'd met him when welcoming Tommy home from the war... He was hard to miss tall- taller then Tommy even! and injured he was searching the crowded dock but... It was clear to see that noone was there to greet him off the boat. He looked distraught and shattered. You were a bleeding heart and had approached him as your family had a small get together, you'd given him a hug pressed a sweet kiss to his cheek and welcomed him home giving him one of the flowers in the bouquet you'd brought for tommy. He had appreciated it, more then you'd ever know.

What you hadn't known was that he was moving into a home a few streets away. A few weeks later you saw him and he thanked you politely, you couldn't help think how very handsome he was, perfect blue eyes but for a speck of brown in his right eye, sharp regal features and pale alabaster skin now free from the bruising of his injury. He hadn't been as broad or muscular back then, but had been tall and lean.

Over the next few months chance meetings became dates, dates became full days basking in one another's presence until finally after a few months you'd fallen for the amazing gentle giant. It had been hard falling so hopelessly in love with Henry and having to hide from brothers and gangsters alike. But somehow you'd both made it with minimal near misses. Three years. Three years you'd been having this secret romance with him. But now you wanted more, as selfish as it was you wanted to be free to love him in public. Without worrying who may have seen you or if Aunt Polly will tell Thomas.

Yes she knew alright. There are no secrets from Aunt Polly. She said you done well and had even spoke with Henry a few times, she liked him. He wasn't in the business but could protect you, his shear size would be enough of a deterrent to others. And honestly she thought Tommy would get along with him, henry was clever and had an imposing frame. If Tommy had the chance, you knew Henry would be pulled into the fold, you were just unsure if that's what you both wanted.

Henry hadn't had much luck with work at first when he was here, so he became a boxer for a time learning to fight and defend himself and bulked up. It was terrifying to watch him be so ferocious in the ring and you thanked god each day Henry had avoided gaining a crooked nose. A few times you'd run into Tommy at the fights, your brother had singled you out and had you brought to him to stand and watch. But you were pleased to find out that your brother always placed his money on your man... So that was a good sign wasn't it?

Henry knew you didn't like his fighting but continued, he wanted to offer you everything. A home with kids and garden a cute little dog and the best clothes and food money could buy. So he saved everything! Kept all his winnings and in just over a year he had a nice sum of money in bets from his winnings and managed to earn enough for a small house. Since then he had a job doing the heavy lifting in a local Steel works.

Everything was set! Henry had a home for you, which you had a hand in help decorate. He promised a long and happy future with you! There was just the small problem of your family. They were... Protective to say the least, not only were you a Shelby sister but younger then Ava.

You quickly left the street today you were meeting Henry by the docks where Tommy kept the horse he'd just got. It was close... but not too close, it was worth the risk to be able to see Henry. Today was the day. You both decided! Henry will talk to them, introduce himself to your brothers this afternoon at the pub before they could drink too much.

You rounded the barn casting one final glance over your shoulder out of habit and slipped into the stalls. You could see him already, his flat cap and dark blue suit. Oh god he had dressed up for it, shit tommy would laugh him out of the bar. You chewed your lip and quivered you were anxious, this could be make or break. If Tommy was against it there was no way you could sneak about and keep your relationship going. They would chase henry out of Birmingham. Or kill him.

You stepped around the horse and giggled watching as henry gave himself a little pep talk twisting his signet ring on his pinkie with shaky hands. He was terrified and so were you. He paused and spun around to face you when he heard the small clicks of your heels on the concrete floor.

"W-what do you think?" he said spinning around holding his hands out letting you get a look at him. You stepped closer to him trying to settle your rapid heart. He was immaculate, stunning and handsome, sculpted by the gods... But looked too pretty. And god knows a Shelby girl wont be allowed to date a pretty boy. You smiled at him stopping inches away from him and walked your fingers over his chest slowly unbuttoning his suit jacket.

"You are magnificent... But a little too refined." you hummed motioning for him to shrug out of the loose suit jacket. He hissed out a shaky breath as you took the jacket from him and tucked it over your arm. That was better, the vest and white shirt showed his frame perfectly, and it also showed the slight strain on the buttons of his shirt. Hinting at the powerful man hidden beneath. You wanted them to see he was a strong man and it wasn't all the cut of the suit. You needed them to see you'd chosen a strong man capable of protecting you.

"There perfect" you said stepping back straightening his tie a little and stood back eyeing him carefully. There really was nothing more you could do. He would have to prove himself in what ever test your brother would conjure on the spot. By god you hope he impressed them.

"Yes you are" he quipped quickly eyes locking on to you making you blush and look away tip toeing around the horse in the stall that hid the two of you. Henry drew in a deep breath watching you closely. This was it. Today was the day, and he hadn't a clue what he was going to say to the great Shelby men. He cursed under his breath turning from you for a second. You understood, this wasn't just your future you were risking today, it was his life. Not many impress Tommy and far less managed to get in his good books when they were trying it on with the baby sister.

"You know that you have to just... Go in there and say 'I'm dating your sister' Right? Be firm and tell them like it is! Stand up to them! They would respect that" You cooed grinning at him from across the barn watching as your love eyed you from the other side of the magnificent white horse Tommy had recently got.

"What and have John blind me with his blades?" He scoffed at you before rounding the horse ducking under the stallions huge head and leant forward trapping you with huge hands resting either side of the horse stall you were leaning on.

"Ugh Johnny boy couldn't even reach your eyes Henry... Its just Tommy and Arthur you need to watch..." you rolled your eyes at him trying to act normal and ignore the black cloud hanging over your head. If this was the last time you were to be alone with him you wanted him to remember you as you are, not the nervous terrified woman you were at this moment. You smirked rising on your tip toes and teased his lips with your breath making him groan silently, the deep contracting of his wide barrelled chest the only give away to the effect you had on him.

You pulled back just as he dipped down to meet your lips and giggled at him as he wound his large arms around you hoisting you up by your waist and sat you on the wooden fence on the box stall bringing you eye level with him. You giggled folding your arms in your lap with his jacket knowing he wouldn't let you fall, he never did.

"Ah just Tommy and Arthur... That is cruel, I'm shaking in my shoes love" he teased wetting his lips with the luxurious pink tongue you knew all too well.

"Aww my poor bear, so frightened of my brothers I know, perhaps this will help you find that courage of yours~" you cooed before pressing forward kissing him on the lips. His lips drew up into a beaming grin and he stepped closer forcing your legs to part and dress to rise up to your knees as he devoured you in a heated yet forbidden kiss.

"Well then lets go shall we?" He grumbled eyes alight with a new want, a deep desire he had never shown before. It was thrilling and awe inspiring. Like he had a new lust, a lust for life and not just what was hidden beneath your skirts.

"Oh love like you said Tommy and Arthur?! I'm going to need all my strength for this meeting" he laughed as your face held a look of shock and disbelief then a petulant pout when you realised there will be no quick romp in the hay this afternoon. With one final wink he spun around heading for the door.

You stood outside the pub. Your brothers were inside, you could feel it. There was a buzz in the air, the destinct feeling that followed 'the boss' hanging around. You had drawn a little attention walking the streets With henry at your side. People watched as the young Shelby woman walked arm in arm with an undisclosed male carrying his jacket no less. It made you cringe hearing the murmurs of 'should we tell the boss' 'does tommy know?' 'should we help her?' but luckily none made any moves towards you as you moved deeper and deeper into the heath. Towards the pub. You slowed as you neared the final destination and henry pulled out his cigarette tin fishing out the small stick deciding to have a quick smoke before entering the proverbial lions den.

"It will be okay... He will... Test you, but remember family is everything and I'm his youngest sister so..." you trailed off, the truth was you didn't know what Tommy would do or say. He was unpredictable and cunning, he liked to test people. You just hoped Henry passed with flying colours... or the only thing flying will be... you closed your eyes trying not to think of what would happen if things went sour. Henry could die, literally die today for loving you. It curdled your stomach you cant loose him. You hoped Tommy would see that.

"I know that... Here twos?" he said offering you the small cigarette he had been dragging on quickly nervously trying to pull some more courage from the small stick. Because once he was inside he couldn't show any weakness. It was daunting unable to show weakness when the love of his life was on the line. Henry was under no illusions Tommy could and would kill him, and there would be little Henry could do.

"Just remember y/n no matter what I love you. I will always love you" henry said as you toom a few drags on the cigarette. You whined and nodded breathing out the smoke trying to exhale all the tension and anxiety with the fumes.

"I love you too Henry, so much more then I thought I could ever love anyone" without a thought Henry pulled you to him and pressed a kiss to your lips. He didn't give a damn he was kissing the forbidden princess right outside her king brothers castle, or that the others around them would see. Be needed this one final pick me up before faceing the firing squad.

You smiled pulling back handing Henry the remainder of the cigarette and nodded to him. You got this. Then entered the pub walking right into the private room where your family sat. Instantly Polly looked at you frowning seeing you were pale, worried. Then her eyes flicked to your hands still folded with Henry's jacket draped over them. She drew a deep breath and sat straighter looking at the three males wearily. Oh god.

"Tommy I need to talk to you" you said seriously. But the blue eyed man rolled his eyes flicking the ash off his cigarette into the crystal ashtray before speaking dismissively trying to wave you off.

"Your not having that cat its final" john and Arthur chuckled at the automatic response Tommy gave but you frowned. You wasn't to sure what to say next, you didn't want to agitate him but you needed him to listen.

"No its not that- I have something to tell you and its important" you said drawing the attention of John and Arthur, but tommy heaved a sigh and moved stubbing out the lit cigarette and flicked his eyes to you letting you know he was listening.

"Mr Shelby could we talk?" You looked up seeing Henry standing there, tall and wide. Firm and unafraid confidently eyeing your brothers in a way oud never seen before. People cowered. Henry wasn't there was no hint of the anxious man outside. Henry was on a mission.

"Not now can't you see I'm speaking with my sister?" He grunted his voice was even. But to others could be seen as irritated. You turned as Henry didn't so much as flinch, you thought he'd run off but Henry let himself into the room standing closely behind you, one hand moving to his head removing his flat cap revealing the neat styled hair. The usually fluffy curls pulled into a slick style that accentuated his angular features. You nodded to him with a smile pleading him to carry on. What you didn't expect was for henrys huge arm to wrap around your waist in front of your sibling's. Fuck. You felt the shift in the room, anger and shock radiating from the men but an overwhelming curiosity. They wanted to watch this, it was rare someone was so god damned stupid as to put hands on you.

"She is the reason I'm here Mr Shelby" Henrys voice carried over the small space in a low determined tone. You tucked yourself into him, pivoting and twisting a hand to his tummy resting there, fingers twisting the button on his vest. You just needed to feel him, you felt like you were shielding him, but it was also self soothing. You needed to reassure yourself he was here for you. No one else. You.

"Oh? And why is that then?" Tommy shifted leaning back eyeing the man who was being so familiar with his baby sister. Tommy was no fool, you hand flinched or pulled away, this male had been around you enough that you were used to him touching you. You gravitated towards him like... like a lover? Tommy's blue eyes bit into the man. As unsettling as it was seeing his sister so close to another man Tommy couldn't help feeling a little relief, a small spark of joy. If this was your beau you'd done well. Tall, muscular wide and imposing. Not many would pick a fight with him, even drunk people would steer clear of him.

"She invited me" Tommy smirked hearing the man speak, he was confident. Unafraid that boded well too. He wasn't a fucking coward... or atleast he was pretending not to be.

"This is what I wanted to talk to you all about...Tommy, Arthur, John... This is Henry... My?" You hesitated and looked between henry and our family. You just froze, clammed up at the calculating look on Tommy's face. It was frightening being scrutinised by him.

"Lover sweetheart we agreed no more secrets" Henry finally broke the silence tipping his face down to yours with a smile. Ignoring your family in favour of snapping you back to reality.

"Oh no you fuckin' aint sonny boy- y/n you get your ass over here now!" Arthur broke the silence with a rough voice shouting, ordering you to round the table and sit next to him. You grit your teeth and shoo, your head at Arthur watching as he turned red in anger. You wasn't like Ava, you never caused trouble or made trouble for your brothers, heel you were a 'goody two shoes' always doing as you were told. But this time you refused to do as you were asked and stayed put.

Tommy ever the eagle eye noticed. He had been ready to rip this man to shreds but, your simple act of defiance caught his attention. You wasn't a girl to play silly games, so to blatantly refuse and tell them no and side with this Henry meant you were serious. This was serious. And Tommy was wracking his brain he recognised this man... But from where? He was sure he wasn't a blinder so who was he?

"Now y/n don't make me come and get ya"

"I said no" you snapped at your eldest brother, but your eyes were on Tommy. Henry squeezed your waist as you stared down your most threatening of brothers. Eyes locking with his blue gaze as you held your ground. The smallest of smirks tugged at his lip. You were unsure if it was good or bad but he wasn't scowling so you'd take that as a win.

"Your the one that was boxing...pulverised the others" Tommy said pointing slowly at Henry whilst pulling a crystal glass of whisky towards him, his thumb skimming the rim of the glass in thought. He was thinking, scheming... but then again when was Thomas Shelby not scheming?

"Yes, not that it was personal I needed to win" henry spoke clearly not letting the severe glares f your other brothers shake him. He was impenetrable a solid rock- a mass of a man all firm and sharp angles determined and poised.

"Oh? And why is that then?" Tommy purred still keeping his cards close to his chest, no one knew what he really thought of you and henry or the relationship at that moment. But he was speaking, not shooting. And that was all that mattered.

"I needed the money to buy a house for your sister" Henry said plainly placing his hat on the table in front of him. It was a strange gesture but one you understood. He was making himself comfortable but also using it as a metaphor throwing his hat in the ring so to speak, showing your family he had no intentions on hightailing it out of there and leaving you in the dust.

"You did, did you?" Here was something, a twinkle in the cool blues. You tried to dig deeper but as soon as it was there it had vanished. For a second you dare say your brother was impressed with your choice in man.

"I wasn't coming to you without being able to offer your sister something... I wanted to prove I'm capable of providing her a future" Henry shrugged feeling Tommy with a stare. You shivered hearing the iron will, the absolute control Henry had over himself. John scoffed and leant over the table glaring at Henry dragging on his cigarette then spoke up trying to mimic Tommy's own indifferent threatening demeanour, but failed. There was only one Terrifying Tommy.

" and some tiny house on a backstreet in Birmingham is a future?" john scoffed laughing outloud trying to dampen Henry's resolve. But your man was ready and grinned smugly showing off the perfect teeth and stunning looks.

"Medium actually... not huge but its bigger then what she is used to, with front and back garden bought and paid for... Last week I even got her a kitten... Russian blue expensive but y/n wanted one and I wont deny her" he replied without missing a beat. Henry was proud of what he had achieved, and so he should be. The house he had managed to buy was a nicely sized three bedroom home, and it was indeed larger then where you lived with your family at the moment. Well decorated and furnished with tasteful furniture most of which you picked out together.

"And what you think I'll give my blessing because you got her a bloody cat?" tommy drew the attention back to him. You swallowed dryly. Tommy sounded mad now. You moved shuffling in front of Henry trying to cover him more, yet your hand wandered behind your back and you clasped your lovers hand tightly hoping things wont go from bad to worse.

"No, you don't need to bless anything, I'm not here to ask. I'm telling you that we are together and serious...We've been a couple for almost three years... And its about time I informed you" your breath hitched as Henry's voice resounded in the room. Oh god that was too far! You paled and snapped your head to him on the brink of tears and pressed back into Henry trying to make him pull back, but no. The man was a brick wall- immovable and stubborn... yet cool and unfazed. But what struck you most was the shock on your brothers faces. No one had spoken to any of them like that for a very long time. And for good reason.

"There is a fine line between courage and stupidity Henry" Tommy said recovering from the shock quicker then the others. He didn't even see you now standing on shaking knees trying to shield henry as much as you could with your frame. But it was no use, Henry was to big, you were but a tiny waif of a woman in front of him. But Tommy bore his curious gaze into the huge man. It would appear your love now had his undivided attention.

"I know, but I'm on the right side of it. I love your sister. And I have loved her for three years, since the day I got off the boat" tommy tilted his head to the side surprized once more by your lover. You drew a slow breath in. You knew tommy respected those who fought for their country.

"You served?" came the question as tommy poured himself another glass and then lit up another cigarette. You saw a quick smile light up his face, but again it was gone before anyone could really notice. Henry heaved a deep breath and nodded, he was no fool. He took a chance and it had paid off, or it seemed to have paid off he wasn't staring down the barrel of a gun or had a peaky cap flung at his face.

"Yes, along side you in fact... I was smaller then... Easy to miss. Your sister showed kindness to me when I had no one and nothing. She gave me hope, hope for the possibility of family and a normal life. She managed to ease my terrors and pull me from the memories of the war. And for that I will give her everything" henry spoke, you noticed your brothers each shrunk. They understood, the war left scars on the mind and it was true even henry had suffered, but you were able to sooth him and bring him back from the worst night terrors. Tommy grunted and flicked his gaze from you to your man then back again. There was a warmer hint to the blues, dare you say an acceptance. But even you knew he was still going to pull something out of the bag and throw a curveball at your love. Tommy still needed to test Henry, but atleast you could say so far so good.

"And taken something I assume?" Polly hissed looking away as your brother spoke. You rolled your eyes, did he seriously want to know if you'd fucked? Tommy held Henry captive in his gaze he knew the answer but for some reason he wanted the hear it out loud. You couldn't help this was Tommy's test, he was daring your lover to lie to him. You prayed Henry wasn't that stupid. To your reliefe he proved he wasn't as he replied sincerely.

"I shared something freely given I assure you there was no pressure" the statement wasn't smug, henry didn't make you sound like an achievement, something to conquer. And he made it clear that he hadn't pressed you into anything. It earned him a nod from all three men, you smiled they were coming around to Henry. Thank fuck!

"And you come here and say that to my face? Tell me you've broken in my sister? You certainly have balls" your smile dropped and you shifted on your feet. What just happened? Things were going great, and now they weren't? Luckily Henry was more prepared for this then you and he answered smoothly not fazed by the way things had turned so quickly.

"Yes I'm not going to stand here and lie about our relationship I love her. And I'll not hide it a second more. I will protect her and cherish her she has my upmost respect"

"So you say you respect her? Yet... She's carrying you jacket around like some maid?" tommy tried twisting things pokeing at Henry trying to get a rise out of him. Probably so he had a reason to chase him off. But you wanst having it.

"Tommy, I'm holding it so he cannot run! Stop being an ass" you growled releasing Henry's hand and moved forward seething at your brother who lounged back regarding you carefully.

"That's enough mouth from you y/n you've done enough becoming a fucking little whore when our back is turned?" you paused takeing half a step back as tommy's furious gaze landed on you. You quivered feeling hurt, flushing in anger and embarrassment. Not once had he spoke to you like that, you were always praised by your brother, protected and loved to hear him growl at you so cruely was heart breaking.

"I'd ask you don't speak to her like that-" Henry spoke up growing angry himself with the way Tommy had spoke to you. But henry was ignored as Tommy began to lay into you hissing venomously belittling you in front of your family and lover.

"Tell me sister is this some last mineut attempt to cover up a bastard? If so is it even his? For all we know you could be bed hopping all over the heath" you whined at the assault mouth hanging open trying to form words but it was hard. Your eyes welled with tears. Call you a cry baby but you loved your brothers and tried to do them proud to have one of them be so nasty cut you deep.

"No!- Tommy of course not-"

"So your just becoming the heaths bike then? To think after everything you'd sink so low to ruin yourself- Ava was one thing she's always ran around behind our backs but you? I really expected better then to become a two bit whore" his words were like razors ice picks hitting your chest, he always knew how to slice deep. It came with being a blinder- but you never thought you'd be on the receiving end. You moved back another step bumping into Henry, you wanted to run and hide. For the first time in your life you were scared, you didn't want to feel your brothers fury.

"Do not speak to her like that in my presence ever again" Henry snarled brushing past you hiding your quivering from behind him. He was livid and for a second you thought he was going to swing for your brother.

"She's my sister-" Tommy started looking back at henry who had taken the bait hook line and sinker. But was cut off by henry stepping forward leaning over crowding Tommy thumping the table with more force then necessary. Everything jumped, the glasses ashtray even the bottle leapt from the table. You jerked gasping as the bang echoed in the room.

"I don't give a fuck. You wont ever talk to her that again. She is mine and brother or not you will treat her with respect or you will pay for it!" everything stopped. No one moved. No one breathed. It wasn't everyday someone threatened A Shelby, least of all Tommy. Henry growled at your blue eyed brother. Tommy tilted his head taking him in.

"H-henry?" you whispered moving forward pressing a hand to the small buckle as the back of his vest tugging him back, making him stand at his full Hight just in time as John shot up from his seat ready to lunge.

"Oi! Don't you talk to him like that I'll have your fucking eyes!" he roared jumping up turning on your lover but Tommy stopped him fisting a hand in his jacket and tugging him to sit back down... He was grinning?

"Tommy?" Arthur asked not following, but then again he always was a few steps behind everyone. You frowned blinking back tears and gasped. That bastard! It was a trick! You slumped and wrapped yourself around henry before anyone could realise what happened. Henry curled himself around you frowning confused and you tucked yourself into him.

"Any man who a the balls to defend her against me...Will protect her from anyone..." Tommy spoke and tipped his head to the seat across from him offering Henry a seat at the table. You both sat quickly beside one another Polly moved pouring you both a drink, you looked like you needed it.

"So? So you mean we can be together?" Henry asked trying to keep up with how he'd just gone from having a target on his back to having a seat with the family. Tommy smiled nodding whilst bringing his own drink to his lips sipping the amber liquid then spoke.

"Mmm But you've broken her... You'll repay me for ruining her by making her an honest woman"

"The rings in my pocket" Henry said rubbing your back as you shook next to him, the adrenaline and worry now rushing through you. All these years of anxiety washing away with sweet tears of reliefe. Henry tucked you under his arm and held you close on the bench seat hushing you as you crumbled. You didn't really register what was said instead pressed your self into him hands tugging his clothes trying to calm down.

"Then do it- but you ever turn your fists on her I'll kill you" Tommy threatened holding out his cigarette tin offering one to henry, he took it thanking him then popped it between his lips and lit the white stick. His hand only quivered slightly, the rush of what just happened hitting him.

"It will never happen, I couldn't live with myself if I ever made her feel less then perfect let alone harm her" he said squeezing you tighter to his side.

"Then we have a deal?" tommy smiled, a genuine smile as he spied the two of you. He had no doubt, if henry was willing to go toe to toe with him in his pub, in front of his family- probably the most dangerous thing you could do in the heath. Then henry will take care of you and protect you with his life. Plus Henry made you happy and that was all Tommy could ask for, your safety and happiness. Contrary to what people thought he had no issues with anyone dating his sisters. He just didn't want his girls to have weak simpering husbands to protect them should the worst ever happen... And Henry knew how to shoot a gun from his time in the forces, so when handed a weapon Tommy wont have to worry about having a newbie protecting his baby sister. And Henry will be given a gun to protect you with.

"That we do" Henry grinned shaking Tommy's hand and quickly snagged your own placing a thin gold band on your left ring finger before you could even muster a single sound. You blinked wiping your eyes pawing at the salty droplets and gasped seeing the band on your finger, a small diamond in the centre or the dainty ring.

"W-what your not e-ven gonna ask me Henry?" You stuttered at him hiccupping and sniffling trying not to have a full blown breakdown and cry from both relief and happiness. Henry laughed pressing a cheeky kiss to your cheek making you flush and tuck your head back into his chest trying to hide from the onlookers.

"Now why would I give you the chance to say no? Hmm? I may be a tad slow sometimes but I'm not a complete idiot" he purred finishing with a small chuckle, that the others echoed everyone had calmed down accepting the news. You whined at him and slapped his chest lightly pouting as henry laughed.

"Besides your brother and I made a deal" he added as you pulled back eyeing your new ring with a weak smile managing to control yourself bar a few sniffling gasps and the odd rogue tear.

"Oh s-o I'm b-business?~" you tried to tease him but the words lost their bite as you were still tearful from your crying. You were weepy you couldn't help it, today had been stressful- hell this past week had been stressful!

"Business? No... Your my world love" he cooed not caring in the slightest at how soppy he sounded. He wasn't here to put on a show for your brothers. He was here for you.

"I love you" you said peeking up at him with a shy smile.

"Good to know~" he hummed winking at you taking another drag of the cigarette, but you pouted sticking out your bottom lip like you did each time he teased you.

"Yes, yes I love you too" he caved pressing a chaste kiss to your lips drawing a growl from your eldest brother, but nothing was thrown so you summarized you were safe.

"Congratulations Henry I told you they weren't that bad" Polly spoke up quickly ending your sweet kiss before anything could go south.

"Yes Ms Polly you were right, we should have listened to you" henry admitted rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly

"Wait pol you knew?" tommy growled snapping to his aunt but the older woman rolled her eyes. Honestly you think he'd learn by now. No one pulled the wool over Polly's eyes.

"Who to you think has helped keep her from having a kid for three years Tommy! At least that's one thing I don't have to worry about anymore thank god!" she huffed pretending to be annoyed but you knew she was happy for you. She had been routing for henry, and trying to get you to tell the boys for a long time. You were just scared.

"Polly! Stop it" you squeaked flushing, no one needed to know just what Polly had been helping you with! Least of all your fucking siblings!

"What its true? Now your free to pop them out without any uncomfortable questions from this lot, and i have no doubt it will be soon" she teased with a smirk enjoying tormenting you, she had bit her tongue for too long it was about time she got to poke fun at you. You were such a shy innocent little thing.

"Oh my god stop" you moaned ducking down as everyone chuckled at your expense. Henry then made it worse by ducking down beside you and whispered in your ear.

"...She does have a point love" then nipped at it quickly before turning back to your brothers as your face flamed.

It hadn't been the easiest of days, but in the end all the worry and anxiety had paid off not only had you managed to reveal your relationship to your family with no casualties. But you also became engaged to the man of your dreams. Tommy seemed relived, he was happy for you in his own over protective brotherly way. The freedom that came with todays outcome was worth it and now you and henry were free to start your lives together. Truly start with a marriage kids the whole nine yards! And you'd never been happier.

#peaky blinders au #henry cavill #henry cavill fic #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill fanfiction #rpf #henry cavill au #henry cavil x y/n

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jiminiediminie · 4 years ago

Text

A not-at-all brief commentary on BE-hind story interview.

We really got over an hour of BTS just talking about their music. They really told the media yall don’t ask the right questions so let me do it for you. Love that for them.

But honestly I am so happy that they decided to do this. Because most of the time interviewers don’t ask the right questions or it is in a situation where they have time constraints. Or the interviewer never even listened to the album in the first place (think james corden saying his favorite track on be is dynamite probs because it seemed like that was the only one he knew).

I appreciate as well that it is the members interviewing each other. They could have just as easily sat each member in a room and asked them the questions off screen. But they didn't. I think that adds such a personal element to the interview. Bts members likely know about each other’s music (even solo music) better than anyone else. So who better to talk with the members about their music than each other?

Running commentary of each interview below the cut.

JK interviews Jin

Blonde jk for the win

I lost count of how many times they shook hands please they are so annoying

Jin please don’t downplay your talents. That hurt my heart. If I could describe his voice in one word it would have been powerful. I hope that jin got to see all the praise after the fix you cover. Because he killed it in that.

I loved getting to hear the behind the scene of jin’s role in stay; I didn’t know his role in it before he talked about it.

I’m glad jin got to release abyss and put so much of his own work into it. It is also so amazing to hear how much help joon is to all of the members when it comes to lyrics and music. A talented king.

Slightly surprised there wasn't more clowning around in their interview since these two are usually so chaotic together. I thought jk would clown jin when they started talking about jin being older but he didn't. Growth.

Hobi interviews JK

Hobi looks so soft in that cardigan

Hobi right off the bat asking about the mixtape. He knows what we want.

Jk talking about how he wants to try writing songs not just about his own experiences was so interesting to hear; can’t wait to see what he comes up with in the future.

Him talking about all the different things he wants to try but it’s almost too many was very relatable. That feeling of having so many choices you don't know where to start. But that does mean that when we do get a mixtape from him it will be from varying styles of music and i am all here for that. Personally holding out for rocker jk or acoustic jk.

His favorite song to sing is euphoria; that’s so sweet it is such a gem of a song. I think I would have chosen still with you since it’s pretty different than a lot of the other songs he sings.

Hobi saying “you’re all grown up” to jk and jk saying “i'm not the old me” really hit me in the feels. Hobi and bts really did watch jk grow from a slightly awkward pre-teen to the confident man he is today. They must feel so proud of him. 23 yo jk is not a baby of bts anymore. He does what he wants. He wears what wants. He has long hair and dyes it blonde then blue just because he can. He even talked about how his voice has matured. Im glad that the members see that too and seem to be proud of the person he has became.

3 main tracks. 3 mv. 3 choreos of different styles. Yes do it jk please im begging. After seeing him dance in black swan at mma i want to see more contemporary dancing from him. And i feel like after getting still with you and stay he can write songs that would fit that vibe. I just want to see jk’s dance talent showcased more.

I don’t know if the fans could survive 3 separate jk mv. We barely survived a live performance of my time.

Tae interviews Hobi

Tae in that emerald green sweater. He looks so good. He should wear that color more

I love how serious tae is about playing the interviewer. The actor in him never sleeps.

Hobi talking about the dual meanings behind the title of Dis-ease was so cool. Fans obviously caught that it could mean multiple things. But as far as i know that was never confirmed. Now that it is I am once again impressed with the thought they put behind everything they do.

A psychological occupational disease. Your mind hobi

I think it’s so cool that hobi recorded it by himself and how he said that doing it like that allows him to grow as a producer since he has to listen and edit himself. They really just always continue to grow in their roles in music don’t they?

Hobi talking about how he would love to solve his own problems but then remembering that he is part of a team really shows how much they trust and rely on each other. So he and jimin worked on the melody of the bridge together and then joon wrote the lyrics. And now we have the most iconic bridge of all time. Still holding out for a dis-ease live performance or music video (I’m a clown I know).

And lol at tae being like call me next time dude

“I would like to share my music with everyone” -- please do

Please tae is so sweet and attentive!? “When you talked about music i noticed you had a smile on your face and i thought ‘he really loves music’”. “But personally if i had your skills I’d be showing off and be proud of myself”. Kim taehyung is the embodiment of a teddy bear

And closing it with actor tae again -- “can i get your autograph”

Jin interviews Jimin

Two seconds into the interview they are clowning each other with jin saying to talk informally. Yet as soon as jm did (and that slight smile when he did), jin is like I was talking to myself. Chaotic as expected of these two.

Jm talking about his process for music being “just go as i feel” makes so much sense for him. He is an easy going person and it makes sense that it reflects in his work style.

It’s so cool that him coming up with the melody of the dis-ease bridge was just because he was humming to himself and the producer liked it -- almost serendipitous if you will

I love when people praise jimin for his vocals. So hearing him talk about how they used his vocal in place of a female for lgo’s chorus stroked my jm bias ego

Joon is seriously the best human ever. Jimin didn’t want to bother the other members to help with christmas love but joon contacted him and helped with the lyrics anyway. Bts seriously has the most amazing leader.

“I’d like to try making an acoustic style song”. Please do it jimin. Acoustic bts is my weakness but especially acoustic jimin. Songs like promise sound so good with his singing style.

Jin shaking jimin’s pinky 😂

“I’m a little disappointed in the MC” “but you know if you looked around there is no MC like me” -- jinmin’s relationship everybody

Jimin interviews Joon

Minimoni look so cozy in their sweatshirts sitting on a plush rug.

“You know we have this youngest member”. “Oh jungkook?” “No the real youngest” “Oh seokjin. That’s a shame” -- please minimoni are so funny and joon knew immediately who jm was talking about when he said the real youngest.

“It felt like I was doing the only thing i could do” . Please let me give you a hug joon

Joon’s mind continues to amaze me. How he talked about needing the concept or key word to give “flesh” to the song was such a good way to explain how he approaches music.

“What do you mean little? You play a very big role” -- lol jimin speaking facts. I already mentioned how amazing it is that he helped jimin and jin with their individual songs. The fact that members who want help with their own music always seem to go to joon really tells you how much of an amazing and talented human being kim namjoon is. I can’t remember the context, but there was this moment that jimin (or was it hobi?) said something like “what would we do if we didn't have rm”. They are truly lucky to have him.

Release that minimoni subunit now please and thank you

Tell us what you’re working on joon don't be shy. Joon mentioned that his music is like a diary. I would love to know his thoughts expressed in music now. 2018 joon who made mono and 2021 joon are two very different people. Bts has grown so much since then.

Joon interviews Yoongi

The work colleagues! Did you know they have worked together for 10 years?

Yoongi’s fuzzy sweater. So soft

Yoongi saying he writes songs when he is bored. Lol i love him so much

It’s really interesting to hear them talk about their lyrics getting rejected. I guess we don’t hear much about that part. And lol at joon just laughing and saying he guesses he didn’t grasp tae’s intentions for b&g.

I like that this was more of a conversation than an interview. I love it when these two just sit together and talk about technical stuff that i don’t understand (like the festa interview)

Yoongi is such a good person to make music with. JK wanted to add humming to telepathy? They added humming to telepathy. I had wondered the reason why there are two different versions of the song. I prefer the longer one tbh

Yoongi wants to make an acoustic song? Hell yeah. Jimin does too. So yoongi x jimin subunit acoustic song with yoongi playing the guitar (please). Also a folk song?? Yoongi your taste i like it

I can’t wait to hear yoongi sing im so excited for him

Yoongi talking about how they made this album with no pressure and got to just do what they wanted and that it was received so well. How he wants to keep making music like that. That makes me happy. I want them to continue to get to do that. I love the big productions and concepts of their albums. But if they are happier making albums like be that do not have that then that is what i want them to do.

“Please listen to telepathy a lot” -- what yoongi wants yoongi gets. Go stream telepathy

Yoongi interviews Tae

The title of blue and grey is because tae wants to overcome that feeling. My heart.

He looked so shy talking blue and grey. I am so excited to see him get to talk about kth1 when it comes out. I could listen to him for hours.

English guide track? Release it tae

“I felt kind of proud of myself” -- you should tae

Yoongi straight up asking tae why he didn't include joon’s lyrics was interesting. It’s cool to know that tae had the kind of power to choose what he felt would fit the emotion of the song.

It doesn’t surprise me that tae feels so much pressure to make sure the tape is good before it is released. It seems like when it comes to solo work the members really do feel more pressure since they aren't sharing the burden with the others.

“Please look forward to it” -- don’t worry tae everyone is

We know from the preview that there are 13 songs potentially on the mixtape. That would be so amazing if he released it with so many songs. Tae’s voice sounds so good in so many different styles so i know that it would be so varied.

Final thoughts -- I love that they got to do this. I hope going forward they do this more for their albums. And from what the members said they enjoyed getting to be so involved in the process of making the album. It would be amazing if that continued. While a lot of their hit songs are not made fully by the members, those songs that are often have more meaning to the fans. b&g, stay, telepathy. These were songs from the members. We got to hear their actual thoughts put into these songs. I hope that bh sees how well this album did and lets that continue.

Congrats if you made it to the end!

#my thoughts #bts #ot7 #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #jinkook #hopekook #vhope #jinmin #minimoni #namgi #taegi #jikook #naabc

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butterfliesinmyguts · 4 years ago

Text

A Helping Hand

summary: reader always helps around and levi wonders why.

warning : fluff, angst, and happy lovely stuff(may or may not turn into a series)

“ you did better today...” Mikasa breathed pushing my body off of hers. I finally was able to take her down. before dinner, she’s been helping me train to get better at combat.

a smile fell on my face, getting up and dusting myself off, “ keep it up and I’ll be more scared of you then those titans are..” I was able to keep up with Mikasa in ODM training, which was nearly impossible for everyone else. i felt at home in the air- as soon as my body begins to float, everything thing else zones out. my swords were just an my arms extended and I felt so powerful killing titans- scared yes- but powerful, but on ground I’m a clumsy wreck.

“ now let’s go eat before our meals fall victims to Sasha” letting out a laughed, I quickly remember a promise I made earlier today.“ could you save me a potato or something? I promised Jean I’d cover for his stable shift...” My friend sighed, “ again y/n?” quickly nodding, I set off to the stables.

I didn’t mind helping, if it was me I would want someone to offer to help me. sometimes I helped hange with mission plans, the days we go into town a lady sometime needs help carry supplies in her store, at the end of the week I help armin with reading, and at the beginning of the week I help captain levi organize his papers.

helping Levi is my favorite part of the week, if I’m in his office late enough he’ll set a cup of tea in my face with the words “ drink “ following after. while in my focused trance of replacing the water for the horses, and daydreaming about my captain Levi- two feet come into my line of vision. looking up my eyes were met with cold grey ones and then his trademark frown.

“ why are you out here, this is Jean’s punishment” dropping the buckets to the dirty stable ground, I wiped the sweat off my palms against my pants- fucking Jean, you told me this was duty.

“ just giving him a helping hand” my voice cracked, trying to laugh off the pure nevrousness that his presents brings me. I admit that im extremely fond of captain levi. he’s was the only guy that has ever made my stomach go crazy just by looking at me. the way he holds himself, short- yes- but never looked down on. he is humanity greatest soldier, during training I swear that he watches me. I feel his eyes burning my skin, the one time I did catch him Levi’s eyes widen and his breath hitched. I would kill to even be able to hug him, sometimes I imagine what it’s like to kiss him-but know that’ll never happen, hange told me that he thinks I’m silly and child like - he’d never feel that way about me.

“ - and now you’re standing there looking stupid, are you going to answer me y/n?” I realized that I’ve completely blocked out everything he said.

“ i.. please repeat the question- I’m sorry.” pinch his nose, my captain shook his head toward the ground. “tch, I asked you why your doing his punishment ?” shrugging, I began to brush the horses. “ I like being a helping hand, -“ before he got the chance to scold me I continued with “ it’s the only thing that makes me feel happy..”

looking up to catch him staring at me, our eyes locked together and for the first time ever I saw his eyes soften. taking him in, cause I may not ever be allowed to do it again, my heart ached. Levi is beautiful, breathtaking. his youthful glow made those dark orbs glow,if lips werent in the plain straight line- they would be puffy and pinky- so kissable. pulling my eyes away I finally breathed, trying to focus on the brush going through the horses hair while Levi still watched me. “ if that’s the case I need help mapping out the next expedition, hange told me your quite intelligent.” my cheeked warmed and a smile began to creep up on my lips- hange is getting so much praise next time I see them.“ I’ll find out for myself..” that smile dropped. “ come to my office after you clean and change from your filthy clothes.” nodding I watch the man walk towards the dining hall. On the inside, I was doing leaps. more time with levi, and we’d be talking to each other- I get too share my thoughts with levi.

“let the horse boy have fun with his siblings, and if I catch you doing other’s chores I’m making you run until the sunsets...” and you giggled.

during dinner levi couldn't help to think of you. why did you look at him like that, was there something on his face? maybe you were just scared, but no he’d always caught you looking at him. rather it been during training, in the dinning hall, and even doing expeditions.

Recalling back to when he first saw you, that smile you had permanently planted on your face- stupid what made y/n so happy? he was even more stunned when you got your ass handed to you by reiner during training and yelled “ again!” with that grin. that beautiful smile, y/n was beautiful- everyone knew it. levi heard eren, jean, connie, armin, and even hange talked about what they would do to have you in they’re beds, they all ranted about you body- Levi will admit that he has imagined your shy breath as his hand roamed your skin but It's more than looks with you, you care so much and you're gentle with him.

y/n would make sure that you take off your boots when entering his office ( which is tedious a job in itself ) but you did because Levi hated it when his floors were dirty and when on missions you squeeze all you cadets hands just to comfort them. no one ever has been gentle to him, it made him feel important but more importantly, why couldn't he stop thinking about you.

after showering, you changed into you nightclothes and headed to levi office. you knocked softly to quick “ come in..” I opened the door to Levi pulling two cups of tea. “ your late, I hope you didn't finish the stables...”

pulling your shoes off placing them beside his door you watched him pour, “ I didn’t” assuring him. moving towards the desk, examining the maps- Levi’s notes were so oragnized and neat. each note had so much detail about the surrounding area. while familiarizing with the map, Levi placed the tea cup infront of you. “ drink.” Brushing passed you, he set down in his chair.

why would he risking going in the open field for 740 meters, “ wouldn’t it be better to use this patch for cover?” expressing my concern, levi leaned up and listened to me rumble about the how it’ll be longer but it’ll save more cadets- every change I got I took a peek to see if he was still listening.

those sliver eyes watched me draw circles and point at the map, bottom lip between his teeth. i imagined how good it would feel to push my lips against them, the relief and pleasure that would rush through my body. I craved him “urh- but those are my thoughts..” finishing pushing away from the desk, distracting myself by sipping the tea.

“ where would we stop ?” Levi questioned, my heart warmed up, I stood over him to explain better “ over there would be a great rest point..” pointing to it, my neck completely in front of levi. I felt his breath hitched, clearing my throat i grabbed the pencil marking the on the map. “ I notice a cabin the last time we traveled...”

“ tch, impossible that’s a bit of the trail, with those tree you couldn’t have seen anything..” looking down in shame “ well while everyone was sleep I explored, even found a waterhole..”

I knew the risk of exploring, but I couldn’t help myself. while setting up for camp I saw a stream pulling down and I just had to see.

“don’t ever do that again...” nodding feeling ashamed, does this mean I have to go stay in the dungeon like eren? his eyes lighten a smirk playing along his lips.

“ just don’t go alone okay?” smiling at his words. sitting across from him I continued to tell him my discoveries - making sure he took notes of the waterhole and fields filled with berries. Levi forced me to write all my finding down, and he promised to even follow me on one of my ventures next time.

as time flew by tea cups were spilled, by me of course, and I was forced to re write the papers I ‘ ruined ‘ leaning my head on this desk my eyes flutter - wake up y/n - yawning I turned to levi still writing, how is he still writing? that tea was not keeping him up. so much energy, my eyes trailed his toned arms- the veins moving every in each stroke. blinking I distracted myself from my dirty thoughts.

“ you need to sleep levi” stretch my bones, the pop and crack give me a shot of adrenaline so I can actually wake up. “I’m fine” he muttered.

Levi eyes sunk from the lack of sleep, he was fighting it- too focused in his work to care that his eyes were burning and skin was red with an indention on his finger from the pen. “ they’ll be there tomorrow I promise..”

I reach to grab the papers, placing my hand softly on his bicip- he stiffened instantly and pushed my back into his bookcase. my ass landed on the ground,“ owe!” I cried, rubbing my back. fuck he is strong for a little guy, wow.

“y/n!”

levi rushed over and I swear his eyes were widen, like he was worried that he actually hurt me. Levi quickly leaning down watching me.“ I didn't mean to that y/n” a couldn't help but smile at him. were so close right now, my nose filled with his fresh scent- mint and tea leafs.

“ don't worry captain I-” levi’s hand pat my head. I could fucking scream in joy right now. did he just pat me? he never touches anyone. what does this mean, pulling away I watch his hand close as his finger tips carcassed his palms. as if he was trying to saver the feeling of my head, huh?

“your being gentle with me, why?” questioning him- levi set down in front of me. “ why not, your gentle with everyone else..” my eyes widen, he notices me In that way? planting his hand on my cheek, my heart stop, It felt so warm- his thumb wipe the tiny tear from the corner of my eyes. I’m blushing “I just flung you, and your still smiling why?”

shrugging “ I should have known that what’s going to happen” breathing out, I stared at his lips. “ y/n..” nodding not looking up at him. just kiss him, Levi is right there.

“ l'm going to kiss you..” he leaned and pushed my hair out of my face. repeating those words in my head, “ is that okay?” nodding quickly our lips came together as Levi took me in. I felt his chest against mine, and I couldn’t help but to grip his collar pulling him closer.

our lips begun to dance with each other, levi hands landed on my waist pulling me on top of his thighs. that smile still planted on my face between the kisses, while my hand combed his undercut.

my daydreams weren’t even a compare to the real deal, gently rubbing the back of his neck, Levi groaned into my mouth. With each movement we gained a slow rhythm,our body flowing against each other. I couldn’t help but to moan in pure pleasure I was feeling.

levi pulled bac slowly and watched me with my smiled in a drunken daze. replaying the moments in my head, Levi just kissed me, Levi my captain levi thinks of me- he thinks I’m gentle. a “ wow” left my mouth as he got up, leaning down quickly to steal one last kiss. my smiled never left my lips as I stood up leaning against the bookcase as finger tips brushed over my lips, hope the tingling sensation never went away. Im buzzing, I’m buzzing- all because of him.

watching the man, pick the fallen books up his eyes went to the window . “ it’s almost dawn, go get some sleep” Levi ordered coldly , point toward his bed.

fuck, “it’s dawn already!” I darted around Levi’s office trying to clean my area and while getting myself together. Levi stood there confused, as my actions all clicked in his head- arms crossed tightly along his chest.

“ I promised sasha that I’d help her with her hair this morning- I hope she’s not up already- oh no” slipping on my shoes on. opening the door to walk out, I give him a warm smile. “ I’m so sor-“

“ don’t worry, thanks for the helping hand..” leaning in to kiss him I was met by a closing the door. dumbfound I stood there, “what?”

part 2!

#shall we date leviathan #levi x reader #captain levi #levi aot #levi akerman #attack on titan x reader #aot x y/n #sasha aot #mikasa ackerman #levi attack on titan #odm gear #attack on titan

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myhaikyuuthings · 5 years ago

Note

Bf Hc's for Kageyama bokuto and iwaizumi?

oh my babies, yes ofc!

Boyfriend Headcanons

Kageyama:

very shy when you first start dating

you’re most likely his first relationship so he has no idea what he’s doing

will leave milk on your desk for you, share his milk and even buy your own whenever he buys himself one

would l o v e for you to come to his practices and games

bonus points if you help him practice

spending time helping him practice is the quickest way to get him to open up, fall harder for you And you get more time with him

it’s really a win win to help him out

he loves you 50.1% and volleyball 49.9%

does he love you 100%? yes of course but he also loves volleyball and if you ask him to choose between the two of you? he will have a very very hard time

i feel like he’s the type to absolutely lose himself in a kiss

hes not huge on PDA but if you kiss him in public, he literally can’t help himself

he thinks he’s addicted to your kisses

doesn’t show affection much in the start he doesn’t know how

but once he gets comfortable with you and you start showing him more affection? he wants it Constantly

hold his hand, please

if you’re cuddling his head is either on your chest while you play with his hair, or you’re laying with your foreheads touching just enjoying being with each other

not the noticeably jealous type but he definitely has his tipping point

he tries not to step in if you’re talking to someone or someone’s flirting with you, he trusts you fully

but if he thinks for one second he Could lose you to that person or you look uncomfortable he will step in and not feel bad about it

a lot of your dates are volleyball related tbh

going to watch games together, practicing together etc

but he likes quiet dates too, take him to a park or a coffee shop and he’s thriving

actually really good at communication tbh

if he has an issue with you, he comes directly to you about it almost immediately

he doesn’t like having to overthink if he’s got something to be upset about or not he’d rather confront the problem together

expects the same from you, but understands if sometimes you just Can’t bring up what’s bothering you

will wait impatiently for you to come to him

he just really loves you and wants to make you happy, whatever that is for you

12/10 boyfriend

Bokuto:

i’m in love with him so this is a little biased I’m sorry

upfront about everything

he’s upset? you will know and you’ll know why within seconds

really bad at hiding his emotions as we know

but you appreciate that! never have to play the guessing game with this boy

he is so so so affectionate

from day one, his hand is practically glued to yours as long as you’re okay with that

we love a respectful king

he needs constant validation tbh and he deserves the praise so it balances out

doubts whether or not he’s good enough for you sometimes

he just thinks you’re the epitome of perfection, so he can’t wrap his head around why you would want to be with him of all people

lowkey insecure and idk if thats an unpopular hc but i stand by it

you get promoted to #1 Bokuto wrangler when he’s having an episode

go to his games, his practices everything

when you’re there he’s at the top of his game, his spikes? unstoppable. his blocks? unbreakable

if you happen to miss a game or practice they might as well not even put him on the court

hes so sad omg

he understands Why you couldn’t come, doesn’t help that he’s missing you

the type to want to be around you 24/7

if you have classes together he will hold your hand throughout the entire class, usually leaving his dominant hand useless because he doesn’t want to mess up Your notes

will 100% ask to borrow your notes

study dates! you rarely get anything done but if you promise him a kiss for every question he gets right you have his attention for a solid hour

after that he gets distracted by your kisses

loves loves loves kissing you

if you don’t like kisses on the lips? no problem he will pepper your cheeks with kisses

gets jealous very easily

won’t approach you about it though

just goes directly into ‘emo mode’

takes a little bit to get him out of it tbh

usually a simple “you know you’re the only person I want right? I love you, you’re my person” and a kiss to his forehead and he’ll perk back up

kuroo flirts with you just to throw Bokuto off his game when they play against each other

if you’re ever uncomfortable with anything, he will remove you from that situation

has thrown you over his shoulder to get you out of situations before with no issue

loves to work out with you! if you’re not into working out he will beg you to let him lift you instead of weights

doesn’t matter what you weigh, he can and will lift you

constantly reassures you that you are the most beautiful, intelligent, caring person he’s ever met

you’re sad? not on his watch. he will listen to whatever is upsetting you and if he can fix it he Will, if not? he’s doing everything in his power to cheer you up

cuddling him is a mess. you don’t have a set position you two cuddle in

the most common is you laying your head on his thick thighs while he runs his hands through your hair and vice versa

big spoon, little spoon, he doesn’t care as long as he can touch you

when it’s too hot to cuddle, he Must at the very least have a pinky touching you or he gets restless

15/10 respectful, funny, kind, talented boyfriend. marry him seriously he will marry you with zero hesitation

Iwaizumi:

you two roast Oikawa together #couplegoals

he’s big on taking care of yourself, proper sleep a good diet lots of water

if you’re forgetful like me and don’t always take care of yourself properly he will text you every few hours to remind you to drink water and eat something

not huge on pda, mainly because of Oikawa, he doesn’t want to hear his mouth

but if you love pda, he’ll compromise, just try to keep it to a minimum around the captain

no shame in his love for you though

if you tell him you don’t feel the love he is doing a full 180

will full on make out with you in front of Oikawa if that’s what it takes for you to realize how important you are to him

come to his games. he won’t ask you to nor does he expect you to but it really helps him

knowing that you’re out in the crowd cheering for him, it’s his biggest motivation

bonus points if you’re louder than Oikawa’s fanclub

loves going on dates with you

the type to pick you up at random times for impromptu dates just because he misses you

not super clingy but definitely likes having you around, he knows you both have your own life and he respects that but if you can spend time together he wants to

will leave practice early if you tell him you’re sad or miss him

super cuddly in the privacy of your own home

wrap yourself around him like a koala and he is in heaven

honestly just loves feeling like he can protect you, even if you can protect yourself

will 100% help you study, and is super nice about it

you were skeptical after hearing the horror stories from Oikawa but honestly he has a ton of patience with you and will go over the same question for an hour until you understand it if necessary

just wants you to succeed

another one who loves your kisses

he likes making out and everything but the small kisses mean more to him

when you kiss his cheek before a game, or press a kiss to the back of his hand while you’re walking together woooo

he just feels so loved and knows you have no other motive

with make outs theres always the chance the other person is just horny, but these? they’re so innocent and he can feel how much you care about him with them

not the greatest at expressing himself at first but not terrible either, you make do

once he fully opens up though, you know he loves you

won’t let you stay sad, if you’re upset for whatever reason hes just

“let’s go bully shittykawa that always makes me feel better”

if by some miracle that doesn’t help you, time for cuddles movies and calming tea

gives the b e s t massages with no complaint

just a really good boyfriend 11/10 caring, funny, protective

#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu reaction #haikyuu headcanons #iwaizumi x reader #bokuto x reader #kageyama x reader #haikyuu!! reactions #haikyuu!! imagine #haikyuu!! headcanons #bokuto #bokuto kotaro #kageyama tobio #kageyama #iwaizumi #iwaizumi hajime

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ladyideal · 4 years ago

Text

Valentine’s Day Drabbles

We all know what this day is all about. Lmao. While it shouldn't only be one day you should be appreciating your partner, let's do this anyways.

Star Trek:

AOS Crew: Jim, Scotty, Bones, scones x reader, mckirk x reader

Disco Crew (s2 only): Pike, Tilly

Almost Human: John Kennex

LOTR: Aragorn, Eomer, Legolas, Boromir, Haldir

The Boys: Billy Butcher, Hughie

Marvel: Bucky Barnes, Dr. Strange, Steve Rogers (if you don’t mind me trying to write him), Stucky x reader

Rules:

Please reblog. 🙂 Share the love around.

It’s open to anyone and everyone, but it would be nice if you were following me.

I will allow anons this time. But please. One ask per person. If I get too many anon requests, I will reserve the right to write first come first serve.

Send in an ask with your prompt(s) and character/ships. If you want to suggest other characters on the list, just ask.

If you would like a pet within the story, lemme know. I'll be forever grateful. Or if you want something specific, also put that in.

Last date to request for a drabble will be February 12th, 2021.

Mix and match, choose more than one prompt if you wish.

If you've got any questions, feel free to message me. 🙂 They’ll be all be posted on the 14th!

Prompts Below:

1. “Be mine until the end of time.”

2. “I’ve been hit with Cupid’s arrow.”

3. “Happy Valentine’s Day, from now until forever.”

4. “Only if you promise to be my valentine.”

5. “Happy Valentine’s Day!” “Um….. is that today?”

6. Preparing a special Valentine’s Day dinner together.

7. Trying to find the right words to write in a Valentine’s Day card

8. Making homemade chocolates for their beloved

9. Planning and proposing to their significant other on Valentine’s Day

10. Wearing brand new lingerie for a sexy evening together

11. Attending a Valentine’s Day party and finding an impromptu date

12. Your crush giving you advice for the night of Valentine’s Day when they think you already have another date

13. Being surprised by flowers and chocolate sent to your work from a secret admirer

14. Forgetting tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, and frantically rushing out to find a last-minute gift.

15. Writing a secret love letter and leaving it on your crush’s desk

16. “Roses are red, violets are blue, all I want for this V-Day is to do you!”

17. Candy hearts

18. Roses

19. Blind date/set up by friends

20. Chocolates

21. Movie night

22. Late for a date

23. Wrong restaurant

24. Strangers alone on Valentine's day

25. Friend(s) date

26. Rained out picnic

27. Low on money/homemade date

28. Surprise date while working late

29. Forgot to get anything

30. Babysitter canceled/Family date night

31. Secret admirer/admitting a crush

Situations:

32. Person A and Person B are friends and neither of them have a date for Valentine’s Day, so they decide to order takeout of some kind and watch a movie together. At some point, hidden feelings are revealed.

33. “ Happy unimaginative, consumerist oriented and completely arbitrary, manipulative, and shallow interpretation of romance day.”

34. Person A has been in love with person B for years and is trying to work up the courage to ask them out on Valentine’s Day.

35. Person A is friends with Person B and Person C and believes they belong together, so when Person A and Person B agree to set each other up on blind dates, Person A sets person B up with Person C.

36. “I know a Valentine’s Day proposal is cliche, but won’t it be romantic?”“ This Valentine’s Day is officially Pal-entine’s Day.” “ Isn’t that the emperor from Star Wars?”

37. “I’m not good with feelings, but here goes nothing. My life sucks less with you in it.”

38. Person A plans the most romantic day ever, not realizing Person B hates Valentine’s Day.

39. Valentine’s Day break up.

40. “ I don’t even want to hear about Valentine’s Day, okay? The love of my life is dead.”

41. “This holiday is so pointless.”

42. “Do you maybe want to go to the Valentine’s dance with me??

43. Person A and Person B were going to have the most amazing date ever, but there was a snowstorm and now they’re stuck at home.

44. “You still have your Christmas lights up? It’s February! Get your life together!”

45. Person A and Person B have to spend Valentine’s Day apart.

46. “What? I do not like him/her/them! We’re just friends.”

47. “Wow, you suck at flirting.”

48. Person A is stood up for a date. Person B, who is secretly in love with them, does everything in their power to cheer them up.

49. Quarantine Valentine’s Day.

50. Person A and Person B debate which fictional couple they would be. And there was only one bed!

51. Person A doesn’t know Person B and Person C are together, until Person C walks into Person B’s room on Valentine’s Day without knocking.

52. Person A sets up a romantic scavenger hunt for Person B.

53. Person A is late for a date with Person B.

54. Person A accidentally buys Person B a gift they are allergic to.

55. A carriage ride at sunset.

56. “Hey, we should play spin the bottle!”

57. A date gone horribly wrong.

58. “I need help picking an outfit for a date tonight.”

59. Person A and Person B make a bet. If Person B loses, they have to go on a date with Person A.

60. Stargazing.

61. “I got a new dress. Do you like it?” “I’ll like it better when it’s on my floor.”

62. Medieval royalty romance AU

63. Person B is in love with Person A, who agreed to go out with Person C for Valentine’s Day.

64. Romantic getaway.

65. Personalized candy hearts.

66. Person A and Person B are on a date when they run into Person A’s ex.

67. Person A confesses their love to Person B, who does not return their feelings.

68. Person A and Person B decide to platonically go on a date.

69. Everyone spends the whole day trying to get Person A and Person B together.

70. Person A and Person B get into a situation in which they think they are going to die, so they pour their hearts out only to be rescued at the last minute.

71. First Valentine’s Day as a married couple.

72. Person A tries to prove they aren’t in love with Person B by setting Person B up on a date.

73. A picnic in the park, but it’s snowing.

74. Person A gives Person B a romantic gift and Person A vows to keep it forever.

75. Caught cheating on Valentine’s Day.

76. First kiss.

77. “This has been terrible, but at least I’m with you.”

78. Person A has a surprise planned and Person B is dying to know what it is.

79. Person A and Person B are on a date and discover Person C and Person D have secretly been together for months.

80. Cupid’s arrow

81. Getting stood up on Valentine’s Day

82. Watching the one you love on a date with another

83. Pinky promise me forever

84. Massages

85. Open prompt

Credit prompts to @vv-writing-prompts, @writing-prompts-list, & @im-the-letter-t

#valentines2021 #valentine's day prompts #taking up drabbles

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honeypirate · 4 years ago

Text

Thanksgiving Kisses

Aizawa x fyn

A/n: okay so I felt very inspired by fire force and mha so I wanted to write a character who’s quirk is like Sho’s adolla. I also thought it would be cool to have the readers hero name be Adolla.

Hero name: Adolla

Hero suit description: simple black body suit that goes to your ankles and wrists. Easy to move in and keeps you warmer so you can hold your time freeze longer. A belt that holds your katana on your back. Thigh high black combat boots that hold several throwing knives and a dagger.

Quirk info: readers special attack requires chilling the surrounding area to such a low temperature, it reduces the heat that causes the natural expansion of the universe, resulting in time passing more slowly for everything; the sole exception being the reader, who remains at normal speed. The only downside being you can’t hold it for too long or else you’ll freeze.

My change is that Reader can also transfer the body heat from attackers into making her attacks with a katana even more powerful.

I feel like I really like this version of reader. “Adolla” reader will probably be a reocurring character for my fics.

☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎☁︎︎

“It doesnt count if you’re already planning your defeat”

You’re in the training grounds, critiquing a student that you’re giving one on one lessons after school. He’s not even trying at this point and it’s starting to annoy you.

“If you’re not fighting like it’s your last fight you’re going to get no where. You’re already accepting that you’ll fail, so you’ll fail. How can you grow into the hero you need to be if you’re not even trying?” (Wow. I sound like Mr Aizawa) you think to yourself as the student gets mad and attacks.

You activate your quirk and take a few moments as the world cools, in your demension of silence, to really look at the student’s form as he came at you. His quirk was fire and he had a fireball headed right towards you as you walked up to him, he was getting faster you’d give him that. You lightly shove him back on his butt as you release your quirk. He falls back with a grunt. “You’re getting better, quicker. If you can learn to control your anger you’ll be a great hero” you say and help him back to his feet “that’s it for today” he bows and then leaves running away from you.

You picked up your black jacket from the ground and sigh. Your teaching outfit consisted of loose black combat pants tucked into black boots with a white tank top tucked in to your pants. You had your Katana slung across your back and didn’t feel like removing it to put on your jacket so you just threw it over your shoulder. You liked to show off the tattoos on your right arm, a half sleeve of flowers and butterflies from your mid forearm to your shoulder. But for more professional meetings you kept a jacket with you, it also helped keep you warm if you had to use your quirk for so long.

“You could go a little easier on him” you chuckled as you turned to the man in the doorway, walking towards him you say “I could but the world won’t go easy on him.” He smirks and when you’re right in front of him you touch his chest “I’m just teaching like I know you would Sir” you smile coyly and look up at him Through your lashes, he chuckles “I keep saying you don’t have to call me sir. We’re coworkers and you’re not even that much younger than me. Call me Aizawa. Or Shouta even” he says and you get even closer to him and whisper “I know you like it when I call you Sir” you wink and then laugh when he blushes. You pull back and smile innocently. “Shouta it is then” You would always mess with him and tease him, the only other person he’d let tease him was Present Mic, it made you feel special.

Shouta Aizawa and you were like two peas in a pod, cut from the same cloth, you understood him and he understood you perfectly. When working together or fighting together you can read each other like a book.

You’re walking down the sidewalk with him now, heading back to the teachers dorm “Do you have any plans next week for Thanksgiving?” He asks you and you look at him with a look of shock “Shouta? do you remember my American holidays?” You ask and clutch at your heart “I’m so shocked and a little impressed.” He rolls his eyes and you laugh “I don’t have any plans. I was going to go to my parents place but they decided to go on a cruise so Im going to just stay here. I’m probably going to do some work and then cook dinner. Traditional thanksgiving dinner.” You clear your throat “I notoriously cook too much, do you wanna come?” He looks serious for a second before bumping his shoulder into yours “I’d love to. It sounds fun.” You smile at him suddenly excited “cool! You don’t think it’s weird if it’s just us right? I can invite other people but I’m just not as close with anyone else.::.” He laughs “don’t worry it’ll be fine. Not weird”

You’re bouncing with energy and excitement as you text your mom for recipes, he thinks it’s adorable as he quietly watches you in his peripheral vision. When you shove your phone into your pocket you get an idea “also Shouta?...do you happen to be good at cooking? Maybe you could come over early and help me?” You sound shy and looking at the ground “I can cook. And I’d love to help you” he says in his normal gruff voice, trying not to show how his heart fluttered and how he got excited to be around you in a setting outside of work.

You were at the dorms now and had to part ways “okay. So if we don’t have anything crazy happen with villains, you can just come over after classes are over and after you’re done with whatever work you have and we can cook and listen to music. It will be great!” You can’t help but hug him, smiling more when he hugs you back. “Thank you, Shouta. To be honest I was sad because this is my favorite holiday.” You pull back before you let yourself melt into him like you really wanted to. “You’re my hero” you say dramatically and he smiles and tucks your hair behind your ear. “I’m glad I can help”

You can’t help but activate your quirk for a few seconds, looking up at him, leaning softly into his touch.

You release your quirk and he looks confused for half a second, was your skin this cold when he first touched you? You smile up at him “I’m gonna go prepare. Thank you again. See you later” you hate leaving him. He’s like a magnet to you, you wanted to be around him always. So it was always hard to say goodbye.

He hated watching you go, always wanted to reach out and stop you, to pull you back to him and hold you tight. But he never did. He was always so afraid of having someone he loved, afraid they’d get hurt or targeted from villains. But with you it was different. He had no fears because you were by far the most powerful hero he knew. More powerful than All Might because of the fact that you could stop time. He’d have nothing to ever worry about with you, but still he held back. Overthought about it, anxiety bigger than he could handle right now.

As strong as you were, you enjoyed being low key. You never wanted to be the number one hero, you confessed to him one night walking home together, you wanted to help people not be in the spotlight. He was one of the few people who knew truly how your quirk worked and he’d always keep your secrets. You only wanted to help people like you wish someone could have helped your best friend when you were kids, who was caught in the crosshairs on the sidelines of the action. You used your quirk to focus on bystanders first then help with the villains. He adored that you were focused on doing good and not fame. Once you disappeared he shoved his hands into his pocket and went to his place.

The next day you went out and bought the groceries you would need. You were so excited you didn’t even mind carrying the heavy bags back home. “Y/n why didn’t you call me?” Aizawa appears behind you and takes some bags from your hands “Hey Shouta! I should have, you’re right! I didn’t expect it to be so much” you laugh and smile up at him as you distribute bags between you both. The way the sunlight hit you just then, you looked like an angel to him, like you had a real halo. “Next time. Promise?” He says and You laugh, warmed by how much he cares “Pinky promise!” You say and reach out linking your pinky with his around the bags you carried. That small action made him fall harder for you. The rest of the walk filled with easy conversation, he carried the groceries to your apartment before excusing himself to finish his original errands before running into you.

Before you knew it, Thanksgiving arrived! You prepped the night before making two pies, got up early to make your moms famous stuffing and stuffed the Turkey. Setting a reminder on your phone to come back and put it in the oven during lunch.

You wore socks that had turkeys on them and that was the only change to your appearance. You teach your classes and train your students before heading back to your place to flip the turkey and start prepping the other side dishes. You get home and kick off your shoes and setting your Katana on it’s shelf. You squeal excitedly as you look around your clean apartment and your small table in your dining room set up and decorated with nice plates and silverware as well as nice thanksgiving centerpieces you borrowed from home.

You flip the turkey and connect your phone to your surround sound speakers that play in the kitchen and living room, playing your favorite playlist which you mixed in holiday music to so it was a perfect mix.

While you’re in your room, changing into a red blouse tucked into a black cotton pencil skirt. Aizawa texted you to let you know he’s coming over now and you get a little nervous. You get done changing and do a little makeup before heading out and getting out ingredients and cutting boards, thankful to have busy work so you could do something with your hands. He knocks and you tell for him to come in.

“Hey Shouta. Thank you again for helping me” you smile and he nods “no problem. What do you need me to do?” You freeze the moment, he’s rolling up his sleeves and you take a good look at what he’s wearing. He actually dressed up nice for your two person party. A black button up shirt into black nice pants. He slicked his hair back into a low bun and had on socks with turkeys on them, your face flushes and you feel the cold make it’s way up your neck and back before you let the moment go and let your quirk go. You smile in embarrassment from your actions, glad he wasn’t looking at you to see the steam from your flushed cheeks and the ice. “Well the turkey needs anither hour or so, I’ve made a cheese ball and crackers for snacking in case you’re hungry. It’s what my mom used to do for us growing up”

He looks at your hands as you cut up an onion, your fingers expertly dicing. He loves your beautiful hands. Your voice brings him back to the moment. “Maybe you could make the sweet potato casserole. I have the recipe right here” you wash your hands and grab a note card from the top of the fridge. “I’m making the green bean casserole and then when we’re done the turkey will be done and we can bake them. Then after that I have cranberry sauce and bread dough to make into rolls.” He takes the note card and gets busy. You already boiled the potatoes so it wasn’t hard work, as you guys worked you talked and flirted. You stole many glances at him wishing you could reach out and kiss him. After he was done with the casserole he started making the cranberry sauce.

You finished the green bean casserole and then checked the turkey “it’s done! You grin at him and then say “can you get it out of the oven for me? It’s really heavy.” He smiles and nods “of course” he knows what you’re doing. Making him feel more manly with you, he knows your strength and this would be easy for you, but still he gets the hot pads and takes the turkey out of the oven and you easily pop in the casseroles quickly.

He sets the turkey on a towel on the counter, keeping the lid on so it would stay warm. He turns to you and you smile “thank you Shouta” you say quietly and before you realize you’ve reached out and tucked a stray strand of his hair behind his ear. You rest your hand on his cheek and gaze into his eyes.

He places a hand over yours on his cheek and his other hand on your waist pulling you close to him as he looks down at you. You look down at his lips then back to his eyes with a blush starting to reach your cheeks.

“HEYYYYOOO” Present Mic’s voice rang out through your apartment and you and Shouta quickly parted and busied yourselves with other things. “Hey! In the kitchen!” You call out. Shouta clears his throat and you look over at him and wink before Mic comes into the room

“hey Hizashi what’s up?!” You say excitedly and he matches the excitement “how come I wasn’t invited to the party?!” You laugh “I’m sorry I just. It was last minute and I assumed everyone was busy. You’re welcome to stay! And Hey I have an idea! While we wait for this stuff to bake we should put up my Christmas tree!”

Shouta should have groaned and hated this, should have rolled his eyes, but the way you lit up with excitement about putting up a tree made him happy. He smiled at you and nodded. “Sounds fun y/n” he said. Hizashi looked over at him with a furrowed brow “okay! I’ll go get it from my closet!” You wash tour hands and skip from the kitchen down the hall

“Aizawa!” Hizashi whisper yells when you’re gone “what?” He says gruffly “you sly dog. You like her!” He said and pushed Aizawa’s shoulder lightly to which Aizawa just huffed and left the kitchen.

You heard every word, your apartment carries sound so easy, Aizawa liked you! He didn’t deny it! He was trying to kiss you earlier! Amazing! You do a dance in the closet.

You realize you can’t reach the box you roll your stool from your vanity over into the closet and slowly climb on top of it, going slowly to keep your balance, once you had the box in your hand you smiled big and began to lower it to the ground but you lose your balance and the wheels of the stool rolled out from under you,

As you screamed in shock Aizawa ran and slid onto his knees catching you before you fell onto the ground “y/n!” He said looking down at you and you laugh “my hero” you say and reach up stroking his cheek.

Present Mic came running in but paused and kept quiet when he saw you both from the doorway. He decided to go back and check on the casseroles and nab some of that cheeseball he saw.

“You could have came and asked me for help” Aizawa said, still holding you to him as you stroke his cheek “and lose the oportunity to be held in your arms? Never” you say and brush your lips against his softly. You pull back after a second and just look into his eyes, a small smile on his lips as he looks back at you.

You kissed him. Your lips touched his. He wasn’t dreaming right? This is happening? Realistically it’s only been a minute since you kissed him, but it feels like his world has exploded into something beautiful. His heart is beating wild and he has butterflies in his stomach, you fit so perfectly in his arms. Your lips were so soft. Once he was sure he wasn’t dreaming his lips crashed into yours again. You melted into him, kissing him back with just as much fervor. He bites your bottom lip and takes advantage of the moment you gasp to deepen the kiss and stick his tongue into your mouth. You moaned into his mouth and pushed him down onto his back and straddled his hips. Your skirt riding up your thighs gave him the perfect view of your lace underwear when your head whipped up to the sound of the Alexa timer signaling the oven was done. “The food!”

You were on top of him one second and the next second you were gone. Activating your quirk to run into the kitchen, popping up right next to Present Mic with a mouthful of cheese and crackers which went flying from his mouth when he screamed at the top of his lungs when you just appeared out of nowhere.

He chokes on the rest of the food in his mouth, coughing with a hand on his knee, you say “Alexa stop please” as you take the casseroles out of the oven. “They look amazing!!” You squeal in excitement and turn around making eye contact with a very confused Aizawa.

“Sorry Shouta...” you whisper and try to contain your laughter. He just gives you a look that says you’ll continue that later when Hizashi leaves. “So I guess the Christmas tree is forgotten about...” Hizashi says when he finally swallows his mouth full. You pop the rolls in the oven and go get more plates to set out another spot.

When it’s time to eat you make sure they have drinks before you stand at the head of the table with a carving knife and fork in your hands you look at your friends here. You look at Aizawa the most, his expression was so kind and loving it brought happy excited tears to your eyes. “Thank you guys for coming. Aizawa for indulging me and Hizashi for showing up out of the blue. You don’t know how much this truly means to me. In my house thanksgiving has always been just a celebration of family and all of the blessings we have had through the years.” You clear your throat and laugh a little at the happy tears that spill from your eyes. Your friends are smiling at you and you continue with your speech “I am so thankful for you guys and to be able to be at this school in my dream job. you’re my friends and I’m happy to call you my family as well. Okay that’s enough of my tears” you laugh and take the napkin from the outstretched hand of Aizawa near you, dabbing your eyes to not mess up your makeup. “I’ll cut the turkey now and we can dish the rest!” The laughter and conversation ensued as your little table of two close friends began to eat and exclaim how delicious your cooking was.

After dinner was over, Aizawa and Hizashi helped you clear the table to set out the pies and whip cream and refill drinks, as they enjoyed dessert you excused yourself to the kitchen. Boxing up leftovers for them if they wanted to take some home.

“You’re something else y/n” you looked up from your last box up into the eyes of the man you were falling for “It’s my way of showing thanks to you guys for all the love I have felt tonight. We’ve all been through so much with each other, for each other, for this school. You guys are my family.” You smile back at him as you stack the boxes on the counter.

He takes your hand and pulls you back into the living room where they have have cleaned up and they’re and Present Mic is smiling wide and says “to y/n! For giving us such a wonderful night free of stress and full of delicious food!” Aizawa hands you a glass and lifts his own “to y/n!” He echos and you smile and can’t help the few tears that fall. “I’m so happy you both enjoyed yourseves.” You say and Aizawa pulls you into a side hug.

Aizawa helps you quickly do all the dishes and Present Mic takes it upon himself to put up your Christmas tree and string it with lights dramatically while singing a bad rendition of jingle bells to which he didn’t know all the words.

“So” you say with a cute laugh “about the uh,,, closet times” you giggle while rinsing a plate and placing it in a drying rack “the closet times. That’s what we’re calling it huh?” You laugh “yeah. That’s what we’re calling it. For now at least. Maybe later we can call it the moment you realized how amazing and wonderful I am and how you realized that was the moment you couldn’t live without me” you say with cocky humor and he turns off the water and finishes washing the last dish. He passes it to you and you rinse it and then take the towel he’s offering you to dry your hands on. “If we wanted to pin point that moment I’d say it was the second day I met you. The closet times was you moment I realized that I should have been kissing you all this time” you feel all giddy in your chest when he softly reaches out and takes you by your cheeks and kisses you again.

You pull back when you hear a whistle in the doorway and laugh when you see Present Mic in the doorway wagging his eyebrows and dancing. “Get outta here” Aizawa says with a little smile before he goes back to kissing you. You giggle against his lips and kiss him back. When he pulls back you tuck his loose hair again and say “nah I’m always gonna call it the closet times” you laugh when he gives you a look.

You take out the left over boxes and hand them to Hizashi as he makes his way out the door. “Thank you y/n. Tonight was just what I needed too” he kissed your cheek and then was gone.

When you turn back to look at Aizawa he’s already walking over to you. You have butterflies in your stomach as he pulls you to him and kisses you hard. “If you want to know the moment I fell in love with you that was the third day I knew you” he says and you laugh. If it was the time I beat your ass in front of your students then that’s the time I fell in love with you too” he laughs and nods “that exact moment I knew I had to have you” you kiss up his neck softly “I’m so thankful for you. And for your kisses” you whisper and he laughs “I’m thankful I finally have you in my arms. I can see why you love this holiday so much y/n. It’s one of my favorites now too” he kissed your forehead and you sighed, feeling like you finally had everything you needed in life.

#mha #mha fanfiction #bnha fanfiction #aizawa fanfiction #aizawa sensei #bnha shouta aizawa #mr aizawa #aizawa x reader #aizawa shouta #shouta aizawa x you #aizawa x y/n #aizawa x you

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t-underneaththeradardancing · 4 years ago

Text

17 things

i wuz tagged by @write-as-rains

now the query iz - dew u really wanna get to know t better - lol

1 nickname uh t iz 1 - uh tone deaf in punk rawk daze - cross eyed monkey in grammer skool - 2 ppl have called me tony machine lol

2 sag witch i have been told means i am both an awkward fucktard and good at flirting

3 vertically challenged idk at some age cuz it was “average” tho the low side i decided 5 ft 6 - its on my eye d - maybe 5′5′

4 only read 1 potter when i wuz teaching 5th grade - liked it well enough but grad skool so idk houses

5 i think the last thing i googled was how to spell hydrangeas - i kept leafing out the e

6 song stuck in head all of them lol prolly listened to dermot kennedy lost 30x in the last 24 but imma trynna nail it - and it keeps giving me ideas to play on one of vita’s songs im working on - u know im a bit obsessive compulsive yah?

7 in this incarnation on tumblr - 526 followers

8 sleep? this iz tumblr where everyone is wired on cawfee and sleep deprived - if im lucky 4 or 5 hours tho i go for way too long on 3 or less - been sleep deprived insomniac since earliest memory

9 lucky # keeps slipping through my hand as lykke li ( side band liv - forget how to liv ) sing but 4

10 imma livin the dream just instead of making $ imma bleeding lol but ... currently a multi media mogul - i make an excellent fool tho - oh wait i did wanna try quantum comedy

11 wearing @2dcloud tee sent by @maggieumber (if im not wearing a 2dcloud which wuz my stage go to until vita started painting t’s for t - imma wearing 1 vita painted) - jeans - blue - blue and black socks - slippers

12 before we b doin 12 i just hafta say 17 is a lot of questions - oh fave song - u gotta b kidding - i listen to music constantly daily - i get obsessed w a new song or 2 daily and listen countless times esp if i get it my hed i wanna cover it - see obsessive compulsive

13 fave aesthetic moon thru clouds

14 margaret atwood will do as favorite author - dont really categorize things as favorite - too many flavors

15 instrument imma guitar player i can play solo or w others - instrumental or can howl along but i wish i could piano better ( im hella good if i only play white keys lol ) or at all really

16 all cat and crow sounds are wonderful and of course birdsong (myriad gentle love thots prayers feels sent and received daily )

17 random idk pretty much tmi alla time at t- underneath dancing

always play the wild card if it comes up

i actually have been pretty fukkin lucky despite a heart attack a little over a year ago not quite completely recovered from - and u never know - if it wuznt for befriending a delusional psychopath whom i didnt realize wuz total evil - and thru them meeting and playing w teen age musicians - and going to wat ended up being a party way too soon after heart attack - i wouldnt have met vita who is everything i ever hoped for in a band mate and more

never under estimate the power of a pinkie promise

after all this - my 2 brain cells agree

consider urself tagged if u wanna

and u no how i end most scribbles

love

#poetry i guess #tag #sacred art productions

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spidey-d00d · 5 years ago

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I've Got You [Peter Parker x Reader] One Shot

“I got you. It’s going to be okay, I promise. Please you’re going to be fine”

Warnings; Near death, pain, fighting, kinda sad not gonna lie

A/N; This took me 10 years to write but I hope its ok! I have another come either sometime during this week or end of this week. Anyways, let me know what you think!

~~~~

“This is going to be dangerous. We all know it, but it needs to be done for the safety of the people in Queens. This is the home of one of our own too, so we make sure we help them and get the job done as soon as possible.” Steve blabbled on the same thing he had been all week. Everyone was prepared and knew what was about to take place, you all knew something bad was going to happen during this mission. You could just feel it, and that is why Steve keeps repeating his same speech over and over again.

You stared off into space, but your eyes focusing on the glass wall behind Steve who was in front of the conference room. Thinking about all of the things that could go wrong, the people you could possibly lose. You were still young, just 20 years old. That is barely anything, you have barley lived, but this is what you signed up for when joining the team. You knew what was to come. You understood the risks you would have to face on a daily basis.

You didn’t want to think about losing the one person who was important to you. He was everything that kept you, well you. He was your rock in everything. Losing your parents and not having family, helping you from your mental stability, to training, to any paperwork that you struggled on. He was there no matter what.

Snapping back to reality, the group was dismissed with 20 minutes to collect your things and meet back together to start the mission. No one said a thing to each other, knowing everyone was considering the factors to this mission. Going to your designated room, you started getting clothes, both mission and everyday clothes just in case. You never know what is going to happen even if everything is planned out to the minute. It could all change in an instant. You took one last glance at the picture that resides on your nightstand.

It was of you and Peter, on one of the biggest nights of your lives, the day you were announced as Avengers. After, well everything on Titan, and the rest of the planet, when Tony half-assed put you two on the team, and five years later after everything was better in the world and you and Peter came back from being dusted and stuck in a world with Strange and Shuri, they had a real press conference to reveal the team in a whole, new and original.

You debated on if you would take the picture, before catching yourself. ‘I will be back to see this picture. No doubt about it, because I am me, and these are the Avengers. Everyone is going to be okay and come out of this fine.’ Deciding not to add the wooden frame to the bag, it was zipped up and thrown by the entrance to your room, before you did one last sweep to make sure nothing would be left behind.

You were trying not to psych yourself out because that would just lead to issues, but you couldn’t help it, something was bound to happen. Everyone knew it, but they tried to ignore it.

Life was about to get a lot more complicated, a lot more than anyone thought.

Coming back into the view of others, you knocked the last person out in your block.

The team had split up onto different blocks to get done with the agents of the other side faster. It was tough, but without them knowing where you were, it was a little less pressure.

Over the intercoms, you could hear many people struggling. You didn’t realize how many people Hydra had under their belt but you did now.

Running to the nearest person, who happened to be Natasha, you turned yourself invisible at will so they wouldn’t see you coming. Someone had Nat pinned down on the ground, so you ran up, wrapping your arms around his neck, choking him and pulling the body off of hers.

She was confused at first, before remembering your powers. You two fought side by side before clearing her block in a matter of minutes.

You were getting tired and weak, and so was everyone else. This is a fight like no other. They never stop coming, from every direction, they just started multiplying.

Soon, all of the Avengers were in one area, backs pressed against each other, staring at the impenetrable circle of enemies forming around everyone. Somehow, like a magnet, your hand found his. The ones that hold you tight when you needed someone there, and the ones that always ran themselves through your hair. They were covered by a thin material of red and baclk stripes, but you could still feel the warmth. It comforted you just a little, knowing he was there.

It was quiet from the group of Avengers, all assessing everything going on in surrounding areas. Knowing what was about to go down, Peter turned to you, slowly.

“I-I love you, and I need you to stay safe, okay? I can’t lose you, not today, not ever. So you stay safe and you don’t get hurt alright?” He said as fast as possible. You knew he was nervous because he was rambling, but this was not the time.

“I will be safe Parker, if you promise me you will come out of this without a scratch or Aunt May will have Cap’s ass. I love you too.” You tried to make light of the situation, and held up your pinky.

He held up his pinky, intertwining the red fabriced pinky to your bare one, both of you leaning in to kiss your thumbs, something you two had been doing for a while to seal the promise.

Not long after, the circle was closing in, and you started getting more worried each step the otherside took.

Soon, you had no choice but to fight. All you did was throw punches and try and not get hit. Punch after punch, and kick after kick, it seemed to never end. You were far past exhausted but there was no room for error because it wasn’t only your life on the line, but also the citizens of Queens.

You were one push away from being knocked onto the ground, but you couldn't let that happen. You were going to finish this fight even if it was the last thing you do.

All of a sudden, a new feeling in your body was occurring. You had never felt this before, but it felt like a wave of energy was flowing through your body and it was building up so fast you didn’t have enough time to process anything before it was released.

It felt like fire in your veins, burning every inch of your body as you screamed in agony. You don’t know what the wave of energy did, because after it left your body, you fell onto the ground. Barely breathing, you were starting to fall in and out of consciousness. You could see blobs of color but other than that, you weren’t seeing much.

In a matter of seconds, there were many heads above your face. You couldn’t make out who it was, but you felt someone lifting your head onto their lap. As they kept brushing your hair away from your face, you knew it was Peter, you could just tell. There was a lot of people talking but you focused in on his voice and only his voice.

“I got you. It’s going to be okay, you’re going to be okay. You promised Y/N. You’re going to fine!” He started getting louder, something that happens when he is starting to get worked up. “I know it hurts, but you need to stay awake. Keep your eyes open for me okay? Keep looking at me!” He continued, trying anything he can to keep you awake.

Everything hurt, it hurt so bad and you knew that closing your eyes and going to sleep would take the pain away but Peter kept keeping you awake. It was quite annoying, but you knew it was for the better. Fighting sleep, you focused on the blob of red above you. He hasn’t taken his mask off yet. Odd.

Suddenly, you were being picked up and someone started moving you. Groaning in pain, they started picking up the pace.

You could remember much after that, but the next thing you knew, you were in a comfy bed. Your eyes were closed, so there was probably some sort of time difference from the last thing you remember.

Slowly opening your sensitive eyes to see the bright room, you winced because it burned. You could hear rustling coming closer to you, but you focused on opening your eyes still.

Soon enough, you fully opened the,, and were met with Bruce, Tony, Cap, and Nat standing over you.

“Wh-what happened?” You cleared your hurting throat.

“You released some sort of burst of energy, that wiped everything out for blocks and blocks. How did you do it?” Bruce was fascinated in your random outburst.

“I don’t know, honestly all I remember was being tired from fighting, and then the next thing I know, its like a fire in my veins, and then pain, a lot of pain.” You tried focusing on the past events but not a lot was coming to mind.

“Why don’t we give her a little bit to wake up some more before we bombard her with a thousand questions okay?” Natasha tried to push the three boys out of the room. “Feel better Y/N/N [Your Nickname] “Thanks” You let out quietly, slightly smiling her way.

They left the room and you started to look around, turning to see a very broken looking Peter in the seat next to you. His eyes were red and swollen from crying, nose red and stains from where his tears repeatedly trailed down his face. You had never seen him like this since… well ever.

“Pete..” You let out quietly.

“I thought I lost you. You promised, you promised that you were going to be safe and not get hurt.” He let out very quickly, all in one breath.

“I didn’t know that I could do that, I swear, and I'm here now, I’m okay now.” You tried showing him you were okay by sitting up, but it sent an excruciating pain up your spine. You groaned and fell back onto the bed, and Peter was up in an instant.

“Are you okay?” He let out frantically, but you just nodded, squeezing your eyes shut for a moment until the pain passed.

“Im fine” You let out with a breath after the pain passed.

“Now come here please.” You moved, to your best ability without hurting so he could lay on the bed with you.

Climbing in next you, he put one arm behind your neck and pulled you close to him. Laying your head on his chest, you smiled, knowing he was real and really there. You weren’t dead and everyone was now okay, the mission was over and you weren’t, so all was good at the moment.

“ I love you Parker.” You grinned.

“Even though you scare the shit out of me most of the time, I love you too.” You could hear him smiling.

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x-dudes · 7 years ago

Note

Can you do a Poe x reader where the reader is a sarcastic mechanic. She and Poe constantly argue like they hate each other but in reality it’s like they’re flirting unknowingly. While arguing, Poe interrupts her by kissing her? If that makes sense

Notes: Totally does!! I gotchu. Also, from the moment I started writing this Han and Leia parallels (without all the toxic tendencies in their relationship) just grabbed at me and I almost couldn’t resist. hope you like it!!! It’s kind of long so you can find it under the cut for convenience sake.

Published: December 28th, 2017

Warnings: Some spoilers for The Last Jedi? Nothing too major. I’d say it kind of spoils the opening scene but it was put under a read more link regardless.

The sweltering heat of the main ship’s gas system almost overcame you, causing heavy beads of sweat to drip from the skin of your face, neck, and back as you worked vigorously on your repairs. A little BB unit sat propped up on your workbench, with it’s center panel opened as you examined the mainframe. Moments earlier he had gone through major electrical damage, evident still in the singed appearance of the orange paint and the heat the droid still radiated hours later, and you were assessing the damage from within, hoping silently it wouldn’t be anything that couldn’t be repaired with what you had available.

“How’s he looking?” A voice called, breaking you from your concentration. You flinched slightly, causing your hand to press against the heated metal of the droid’s outer shell and obtain an oblong burn across your forearm. Though recognizing the voice in question, you refused to let yourself appear anything less than snide and disdainful as you finally lifted your head up to lock eyes.

“Don’t talk to me.” You answered, turning your chair back to the little droid and placing your electric wedge between two magnetic plates along the damaged perimeter of his body.

“(Y/N),-”

“Poe, I’m working, and unlike your job, mine consists of serious concentration and deliberate thought.” You scorned, sending an electric shock through the metallic plates of the wedge and effectively rebooting the droid’s motion system.

“Woah, woah, woah, be careful with my droid.” He chuckled.

“His gyrosystem was in permanent motion lock. Y’know that thing that allows him to even move in the first place? Although, I think it might do him some good to do something other than follow you blindly. So did you want a frozen droid? ‘Cause I can always take out one of his chips if tha-

“I think I get it.”

“No, Poe, I don’t think you do get it.” You snapped. “BB-8 almost died out there- I don’t know if you believe that droids can die like that, I know it’s kind of a ‘controversial’ topic.” You placed air quotes around the word controversial. “But I do. I believe that there’s some other part to them that we can’t build or program. You see it in BB-8, don’t you? He sees it in himself. I know he does.- He’s in here kind of frequently you know?” Of course, it couldn’t be some sort of talk with (Y/N) without a snarky comment or sarcastic remark. “And he risked it all, knowing that this could mean everything, to help you be a careless idiot, because he trusts you. He did it because he loves you.” For once, Poe stood before you completely wordless. Any thoughts of what he could say all died down in his throat before they had the chance to surface. The thick silence was cut with the sounds of happy whirring and chirping as the familiar little droid powered back up. Poe only watched as (Y/N) screwed his plate back into place and gave everything a good shake to test for durability. BB let out a series of low whistles, causing you to laugh as you met the droid’s gaze.

“Sorry, sorry. Hey, Beebee, how ya’ feeling?” He whirred in response. “I can imagine…” You replied as you cleaned the sweat and oil from her palms. You stood up to stroke his side, and Poe watched carefully as the little droid leaned into your touch, hearing your words from just moments earlier play on loop in his head. “Well, I think you’re very brave.”

“Oh, but I’m careless?” Poe gloated, nudging your shoulder with his fingers as he pulled closer to your workbench.

“I think you’re certainly something.” You taunted.

“What kind of something?”

“Well, the last time I was as mean to you as I’d like to be, General Organa called me into her quarters to scold me.” You teased in return, a faint smile playing at the corners of your lips just faint enough for BB-8 alone to notice. “…to say the least.”

“Wait, her quarters?”

“Yeah, and I was still really young and real new to the Resistance mech team, too, so I was convinced that I was going to walk out of there wearing my ass as a hat or something because I couldn’t keep my mouth shut.” You chuckled.

“Oh, man, I don’t even remember what happened that day. What did you do?”

“I think that was one of many times I would threaten to beat you senseless if you didn’t start taking better care of BB-8.” You quipped. “Poor fella…”

“So what’d she do to you? You know, (Y/N), I think ass hats are going to be the next big fashion trend of the decade.” He taunted, scooting closer to your seat on the workbench. You replied with a tempting ‘hmm?’ which he couldn’t help but smirk at. “Yeah, because you are one.”

“Fuck off, Poe.” You replied, shoving him roughly from his seat with a visible smirk. “Getoutta here, your atrocious face and horrendous personality make my working conditions just about unbearable.”

“And we were getting along so well…” He mocked, wiping an imaginary tear as he lifted BB-8 from the table and placed him on the laminate flooring of the ship.

“Uh uh uh, what do you think you’re doing with h-”

“I’m taking him home? As he is mine and I think I have the right to do so?”

“And what makes you so sure he’s all fixed up? That one flight repair won’t turn him into scrap metal and spare parts?” You countered. He stood silent. “Yeah, thought so.” You crouched to speak one-on-one with BB, hearing him whir conflictedly. “Hey, I never said you couldn’t go. Just go easy on yourself, alright? And check up with me at least once every couple of days until I say otherwise, you got that?” The droid rolled his head to signal he understood. “That means no being reckless for you, either. Promise?” BB-8 extended one of his thin metal arms from his chest in a sort of pinky-promise. Your little finger wrapped around the arm with a grin as you stood up to face Poe once again. “If he ends up back in here, I’ll have you wearing your ass as a hat. Are we clear?”

“I’m sorry, princess.” He sneered, one eyebrow raised in his signature Poe Dameron fashion that you’ve grown to resent. “But I think I can handle him.”

“You fucking better…” You called, though he and the little droid were already stepping away.

BB-8 chirped his concerns through the speaker, trying to keep his voice low until they turned the corner. It came out as more of a question than anything else, though it still made Poe chuckle in disbelief.

“Like her?” He repeated. “Yeah, I guess she’s alright…”

“I told you, I told you if he found himself in there one more time, Poe, I wouldn’t fucki-”

“Yeah, I’m aware, princess, what did you expect me to do? I needed him. We can’t all sit along the edge of the battlefield doing-”

“Call me princess one more time see if I don’t smack you into next year.” You threatened, feeling him grow closer with each insult spewed at each other. “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t report to the General that you’re unfit to hold a droid and that BB-8 should essentially be repossessed.” You prompted. He turned his head in serious thought, making you realize only now that you could feel his warm breath fan out against your cheeks.

“Shit- (Y/N), you can’t be seriou-”

“I’m absolutely serious. You and Organa are already kind of on thin ice here, Poe, and for good reason, too. It wouldn’t be very hard at all to report the instances in which-”

“Well then why haven’t ya’, (Y/N)?! Huh?!” Poe snapped slamming his fist on to your workbench with such force, and at such a close proximity that it was second nature to jump.

“Poe,” You began, evening your voice out so were no longer shouting. Fighting wasn’t your goal, you reminded yourself.

“With such an active effort to call me out on every mistake I make with ‘im, why haven’t you just turned me in already?”

“Poe, I-”

“No, I don’t want anymore bullshit from you, (Y/N)! I wan-”

“Because I didn’t report them, Poe! I DIDN’T REPORT ANY OF BB’S PREVIOUS DAMAGES BECAUSE I KNEW IT WOULD GET YOU INTO A LOAD OF SHIT YOU DIDN’T NEED TO BE IN, EVEN THOUGH IT WAS AGAINST VERY STRICT RESISTANCE CODE THAT I DID, ESPECIALLY WHEN SAID DROID HAS HELD INFORMATION CRITICAL TO THE ENTIRE WELLBEING OF THE RESISTANCE. ALL BECAUSE I WAS TRYING TO KEEP YOU OFF THE BENCH AND AWAY FROM THE SHITTY SIDELINES AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, BECAUSE WITH HOW OFTEN BB-8 IS IN HERE I ACTUALLY KIND OF BEGAN TO BELIEVE IN YOU. A LONG TIME AGO, ACTUALLY. BEFORE FLEEING D’QAR, BEFORE THE BLACK SQUADRON, MAYBE EVEN BEFORE YOU BECAME ‘THE POE DAMERON’ POSTERCHILD PILOT OF THE RESISTANCE WHO EVERYONE BUT LEIA’S AFRAID TO CALL OUT, BECAUSE THEY THINK HE CAN DO NO WRONG.” You stopped to catch your breath in short pants, realizing you had moved yourself even closer as you screamed at him. You spoke again, voice now gravelly and soft from misuse, yet still just strong enough to speak your peace. “God, you’re such an idiot. Although I guess this is partially my fault, because I didn’t realize at the time that you were actually kind of a prick- stop that.”

“Stop what?” Poe replied, stepping closer with his signature eyebrow raised in a taunting look. Although this time it was different, and you couldn’t place why.

“Looking at me like that.” You answered.

“Looking at you like what, princess?”

“Stop calling me that.” You stated softly.

“What, Princess?” You nod bitterly. “Weren’t you a princess?” He recalls, thinking back briefly to a conversation he overheard between yourself and Leia.

“Not exactly. Though this is something you would know if you bothered to pay mind to anybody but yourself f-” Your snide remarks died on your lips as Poe feverishly closed the distance, pressing his own to yours. He pulled away, a smug look marking his features. “What? Do you think that just kissing a woman solves all of your problems? You questioned, sneering angrily, yet placing your hands over his chest and keeping him in place by the lapels of his jacket.

“Not exactly. But the years worth of backed up sexual and romantic tension? That’s another story.” You rolled your eyes in a dramatic display, pushing him away from you with a soft thud. He furrowed his brow, unsure of whether to follow as you walked away.

“My shift ends at seven.” You explained, turning back to meet his confused gaze a few feet behind you with a taunting smile. “You want to wait up for me? We can finish this afterwards.”

#frankie takes requests #this was actually pretty fun to write #I enjoyed it #Poe Dameron x Reader #Poe Dameron Imagine #star wars imagine #poe dameron #still taking requests ;)#i even have a prompt list or 2 reblogged if u don't know what to request ;)#just a thought

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secludeed · 6 years ago

Text

I’m sorry, Jen.

Wednesday, July 11, 2018. Approximately 12:15 AM. Corner of Hacienda Blvd. and Temple Ave.

The light is red as I approach it coming to a stop. I am pressing both front and back brakes, Jen sitting behind pushing against the tank as to not press against me before coming to a halt. I notice a sheriff patrol car speed through the perpendicular intersection, another car slowly turning left. I am stopped. The light changes from green to yellow to red. It is our turn to go.

With my clutch held all the way down with two fingers, I rev a little to let her know the light is changing and she holds onto me again. However, the light changes, I accidentally rev too high, also accidentally release the clutch much faster than I anticipated, popped a really high wheelie in which I could not control, and we ultimately come crashing down to our right, in the middle of the intersection.

I rush to her, make sure she’s okay, and she is standing. I tell her to hurry to the side of the road, to get out of the intersection, and she does so. I proceed to pick up my bike, cannot start it up, and push it to where she was. She tells me that something is wet, like water, and a witness pulls over to check on us. Other bystanders check up on us as well as we sat on the floor and me trying to look after her injuries. At this point I feel stinging on my body, a minor case of road rash but nothing else. I look at her injuries. Scraped wrists, slight bruising on her pinky, and overall just minor scratches throughout her hands. She hands me the water to open, and I pour it to help clean her off, to which it is stinging her, normal. Immediately, Nate is called, and I tell him about the situation. He eventually shows up with a bag of ice, a first aid kit, and we are sitting down cleaning up the blood and everything as she is wincing in pain from the wipes. Bandages are placed on the more injured areas, and she asks Nate to go home to retrieve a jacket to hide her injuries. As he leaves, I try my best to look after her, and her pinky is swelling up, and so I try to hold the ice on her wrist and pinky she says is hurting.

All she can think about is how she’ll have to explain this to her family. All I can think about is how to help her, care for her, and my own fucking mistakes.

Nate returns, her mom is calling and worried, and we get a sweater over her after covering the rest of her scrapes. I really do not hope she sprained her wrists, or broke or fractured anything, and by the looks of it there was no intense swelling, she had control of her limbs, and it was just bruising and cuts and scrapes.

Nate leaves to take her home. I reassure that I am okay, and I will promptly be leaving to head home as well.

I rode completely slowly the entire time, not dangerous, but not the speed limit. I thought about all of tonight, what I was going to say, what I was going to do. But most importantly I thought about her, and how I truly fucked up tonight.

Here I am now.

Jen, if you are reading this, I know I told you a lot of what I was thinking earlier via text.

First, I thanked Nate and only talked positively and wished him well for tonight.

Next, I apologize profusely, and maybe even excessively, for there are no words, actions, or thoughts that will make any of this better to me.

You know me, Jen. You know enough about me to know that this is going to haunt me for a long time after tonight, and for the most part it may never go away. Who knows what I am going to do tonight. All I promised was that I would be safe, and I will be here for you no matter what.

However, you do not know everything about me. I honestly wanted to tell you, but last night got late, and today was busy, and quite frankly it all went south. But nevertheless, the point still stands, I have a list on my Notes on this phone. It encompasses essentially most of my thoughts from last night, things I wanted to say to you but never got the chance to.

Jen, I am going to be absolutely honest here. I like you, you know that. I am attracted to people that understand me and my struggles, that is why I was so attracted to Eileen, my ex. She believed in me and listened to me when nobody would or understood. You are like her, you took the chance to listen to me, and that is why I am so attracted to you.

Don’t get me wrong, however. One of the topics I wanted to discuss is that although I do find you attractive, as a person, I understand and respect your decision to stay as friends. First and foremost, I have grown up a lot since both my relationship and as a person in general. I have immense respect for you, and would never try to jeopardize the friendship and connections we had. And therefore, knowing full well at this point that neither of us were ready for a relationship, as well as respecting you saying “don’t ever fall in love with me” sometime between our friendship, that my attraction to you is purely mental, not affectionate. That is why, when I say I love you, it is not because I am craving a romantic relationship or anything of the likes. Instead I mean it wholeheartedly as a person, a genuine human emotion in which I want the best for you, care about you, and need you in my life as friends or anything more. In short, I love you, but I am not in love with you.

Moreover, you know this, but to anyone that stumbles upon this post, I do care about you, Jen. I wanted to give you the world I thought you deserved but never had. I would go out of my way to spoil you and give you everything, not as an inconvenience but as an act of care for you. After tonight, whether you believe me or not, I still do care about you, maybe even moreso now.

And to the point in which I say you know me, but you don’t fully know me: last night was just skimming the surface of my problems. Yes we are both a little messed up. Yes our problems are different and unique in their own ways. And no I will not argue with who has it worse or whatever because that’s just absolutely stupid and ignorant. Regardless, what I wanted to say to you is that deep down, I am a messed up psychopath in my mind. I can imagine doing things that can not only harm myself but all other people, in the snap of a finger. I don’t say this to anyone because why should I? It’s all horrible regardless. Some things I think about are things like how selfish I can be or am, and how manipulative I can be.

You tell me to be myself, to take care of myself or to treat myself out because you think this will make me feel better. No. I put myself through mental agony, and often times physical agony as well like refusing to eat, sleep, or drink anything or even self-harm as a form of suppression from acting impulsively upon these thoughts. If I were to let everything roam freely, it would cause chaos, and real quickly all of my bridges and friendships and ties will be burned down. I can think and say really negative thoughts. I am irresponsible with power, money, and other people’s trust. I can mess up people’s lives with everything they tell me, or the things I know because of how observant and “trustable” I seem to be. But I choose not to because that not only harms myself, it harms everybody I care about, everybody I choose to live for. As for being manipulative: I tend to guilt trip people often, even unintentionally. Do you know one of the reasons my ex was with me for as long as we were together, and why she left? It was because one night upon me opening up with her, I ignorantly muttered that without her in my life I was likely going to be in prison or dead, and if we broke up and ended negatively, I would have killed myself, but not because of her, but by my own inner demons. Of course, this was taken the wrong way, and she knew in the back of her head this was a very real possibility. However, she ultimately swallowed the pill one week and decided enough was a enough. She took the chance on herself and on me, and look where I am today. That is just one case of my manipulation. I am very, very good with manipulating words, phrases, thoughts and even emotions to my favor, but I often times try to catch myself before doing so.

How I felt about Nate? I don’t know. I didn’t like him, not because I hated him, but because I didn’t know him. He hadn’t really proved anything to me to show why I wanted to be friends with him other than some common interests. And I don’t mean this in a bad way, I just mean that I am very selective with my friends, which is why I have so few that I truly do connect with and care about, like you. But after tonight, I can only think positive about him.

And you know me. I give people the benefit of the doubt. I try to look at the positives in everything of everyone around me, like I tried to with Nate and like I do with you. It is because I used to be the opposite before, and it only hurt me more, and I decided to change. Thus, to prevent myself from being the manipulative, disgusting person I know I can be, I told you the same thing I do for myself: pick your friends carefully. Now I did not tell you to drop Nate, even if it sounded like I did. The matter of fact was that I told you to be careful with who you let in your life, especially being a woman, as often times people try to take advantage of others, something I refused to let happen between us. That is why I told you to live your life to the best and funnest you can but at the same time to be careful with your life as well. Like I said, I am not here to control your life. Im merely here to try and guide you to a happier, more fulfilling life. Yet it seems that despite how much you’ve helped me, how happy you’ve made me, how much of a hole you’ve helped me out of, that ultimately I can always fall back down, and more often than not fall deeper than where I started.

I get it. I get a lot of things because I am pretty observant but I get it. Shit happens, accidents and mistakes happen, and as fortunate as we are that nothing worse happened, I still do think about it and kick myself for it, being too hard on myself as you pointed out. But I also understand that this will subside, better and worse things will happen in the future, and to just not repeat the past, something I definitely will refrain from letting happen.

More often than not, I know it is clearly irresponsible of me to be depending on others to call me out on my shit or to take care of me. The truth is, I am ignorant and stupid. I am reckless and careless. And I do not know how to improve without the help I desperately need, but refuse to call for. Special people like you are really all I have in my life, and although I do take advantage of the time we have together in our lives, I cherish each and every memory as much as I can, even long after everything is over. I hold onto the past too much, and that is one of the main reasons why I am where I am today.

I will tell you this, the same I told my ex: I owe you my life. Thank you for saving me, even if it’s just for a brief period of time. What I mean is that you have given me a glimpse of happiness in life again, a sense of fulfillment and purpose, and above all else, a reason to want to live. And often times, I take these moments for granted, and miss it all completely once it is gone. Therefore, whatever happens from here on out, you will always know and understand about me. And more importantly, as long as you are here I can promise I will be here too, not just for you but for myself too. I don’t have much in my life, and very very few people know as much as you do, if not more.

Jen, this is only the surface. I know I say that all too often. But the truth is, I cannot simply say everything that goes on in my mind. I am not just some encyclopedia of problems that can be searched or filtered. Instead I can give you a glimpse of what my demons are, what I am facing or thinking and tell you or explain to you what or how I think. I hope you understand that, for even I do not fully understand myself. But having two people to understand do help immensely, because as you know I think, I overthink, and I have way too many thoughts in my head, more often negative above all else.

I am sorry Jen. I honestly had a lapse of judgement tonight, took advantage of your trust in me, and hurt you, something I never had in mind or ever wished to happen. I completely understand if our friendship is negatively affected or even tarnished after tonight, for I have nobody to blame but myself. You of all people understand how hard I am on myself, so me not listening if you said it was just an accident or anything is just the way I think. I hurt you, and I apologize for it. I am owning up to my mistakes and trying my best to learn and move on. But these things haunt me, and they are only more weapons I can use against myself that will bring my mental health downwards even more, I hope you can understand that. The demons inside of my mind are ever growing, especially in strength and in numbers, and it is because of people like you that I can use to counteract these demons. So for situations like this, I feel it is a battle I must fight alone, a battle that will ultimately make me stronger if it does not kill me first. But having you by my side does definitely help, so I am eternally grateful for having you in my life.

I am so deeply sorry Jen. I do not know how I will ever be able to repay you for this, how I could possibly make up for it. This will always be a sobering moment in my life, and I will always reflect upon this to keep me grounded, and to keep me growing. Rock bottom is near, Jen, and whether or not that is a good thing, it only means that I care more and more about you, and you really are that special person I cherish in my life at the moment. I am so sorry, Jen. I really am. I hope you can forgive me for all of this.

#accident #tw:depression #late night talks #personal #tw:suicidal

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dent-de-leon · 7 years ago

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Hey there Leo, if it's okay with you, I wanted to ask about your thoughts on that bedroom scene. I don't know why it just doesn't sit well with me- it's just that to me keith seems too reserved and... sad... not relieved or open until the very end when the "as many times as it takes line happens". Maybe it's just me because I guess I expected a more im-so-relieved-youre-alive-hug scenario? something just felt off about that entire exchange and I can't point my finger at what.

I think a good way to read shiro’s bedroom scene is to compare it with Lance’s scene in Keith’s room. Because the fact that we get one almost right after the other is definitely intentional, and on some subconscious level, I think you’re meant to compare the two. It’s even a case of two former paladins talking with their lion’s successor. And while Lance’s talk with Keith is kinda touching and it’s really nice to see the two of them opening up more, I still think it has a distinctly different vibe from Kuron and Keith’s.

For one thing, we start off outside in the hall. This is different from Lance’s scene, where we begin in Keith’s room and see the new red paladin just walk in. In the case of the latter, we feel like we belong there. However, with the former, we feel more like an outsider looking in. We hear just snippets of their talk at first, like we’re listening in on a private conversation, a fact that accentuates just how intimate and personal this scene is. It’s like the viewer is uninvited and these words are just meant for Keith and “Shiro.”

When we finally do see someone, it’s this extreme closeup of Kuron. This really highlights how downcast and drained he looks, how his hair is all long and matted and unkempt, how exhausted and defeated he is. There’s no closeup like this with Keith and Lance’s scene, a fact that really makes this shot stand out. It’s a sign that Keith and Kuron are more intimately familiar with one another.

Another thing–in the later scene, when Lance walks in, he has to kind of give a reason why. Keith even points out it’s a surprise to see him stop by–“Must really be bothering you if you’re coming to talk to me.” This is not something that happens usually. And yet, Keith’s talk with Kuron bypasses this part completely. There’s no equivalent to Lance awkwardly knocking and trying to start up a conversation with Keith, because these two are already on a level where having quiet talks with one another is the norm. Because honestly, seeing Keith in “Shiro’s” room during his recovery is just something you’d expect. It’s not something surprisingly uncharacteristic or a shift in dynamic, so there really doesn’t need to be any explicit reason for it.

Now, I’m certain that Keith’s place in the first scene is equal to Lance’s in the second. And likewise, Kuron’s role in the conversation is taken by Keith later on. So, let’s compare them. Keith removes his jacket before Lance stops by, and that doesn’t seem like much. But visually, we can see he’s kind of being more casual and open. He’s also wearing black instead of red, which equates to Lance seeing him as the leader–and by extension, the black paladin. But, that being said, everyone’s seen Keith without his jacket before. In contrast, Kuron is dressed down in an undershirt that makes him seem a lot more bare and vulnerable, because no one else has seen him when he wasn’t completely put together.

Similarly, Kuron still looks disheveled and haggard. He doesn’t feel the need to cut his hair or shave in front of Keith, has no reason to keep up appearances the way he does with the other paladins. Around each other, they can just be themselves. This is emphasized by the fact that Kuron is still lying in bed, and remains painfully honest with Keith about his condition. He says, “I’ll try,” instead of some comforting lie like, “I’ll be fine.” He’s in a position of weakness, And Keith is noticeably standing above him. This makes Kuron look especially down and defeated, and added to that that Keith is put in the role of his caretaker, his protector–clearly, the lines between successor and mentor are very blurred.

Typically, Keith’s position could be seen as having power over someone, as being some kind of aggressor. And yet, he’s taken on the role of Kuron’s guardian, his knight in shining armor. We can glean from Keith mentioning that the others would love to see him that so far they have not, that only Keith has been allowed in Shiro’s bedroom during this delicate time. That he’s the one who not only rescued him but is taking care of him, is staying at his bedside. There’s an intimacy here that’s quite rare. Kuron has really had it rough, but he still doesn’t hold himself back in front of Keith, doesn’t try to maintain a facade. He can allow himself to be exposed and fragile and he knows Keith would never take that trust and shatter it.

Now, let’s compare that to Lance’s scene. Right away, a different dynamic is established. They’re both standing on equal ground, but still noticeably closed off and distant at first. There’s an uncomfortableness, an unfamiliarity to their interactions that you don’t get in the previous scene. Kuron lying down in bed with Keith standing over him undoubtably puts him in a more vulnerable position. But he’s okay with that because this is Keith, and Kuron trusts him to see this side of him. In comparison to that, Lance and Keith both seem very guarded around each other. Their walls aren’t down the way Kuron and Keith’s are.

The tone is also very different. Keith and Lance, while discussing Lance’s insecurities, manage to still inject humor into the scene. For instance, the little thing Lance does where he adds his right index finger and then instead of taking away that finger he just fucking??? removes the pinky from his left hand?? And lmao it just like looks so out of place and silly and it’s really endearing and cute and I love it?? Like, little visual cues like that help to put the viewer more at ease. Lance’s expression is also gold. They’re covering a meaningful topic here, but they do it in a way where it doesn’t feel too heavy.

Now, real quick let’s talk lighting. Kuron’s room is darkly lit, and everything is bathed in this abysmal, dark green hue. It doesn’t feel normal or comforting, it’s like…nervous anticipation. Like something here is very wrong and both Keith and Kuron are just waiting for the other shoe to drop. But again, this is a quiet, completely serious, bleeding open heart to heart in a dark lit bedroom. That feels way more revealing and intimate than two friends talking in a brightly lit, more casual atmosphere. There’s no sense of intensity, heartbreakingly overwhelming emotion, or overhanging danger with Keith and Lance. It’s two friends just having an honest talk and trying to help each other out.

Also, the point of Lance’s talk is very different from Keith’s. Lance goes to Keith to talk about himself, to express his inferiority and do what he thinks is best for the team. So yes, he does this because he cares about the team. But this doesn’t manifest as “Hey, I know things have been rough lately, and we just got Shiro back and he seems really hurt–are you guys doing okay?” it’s “So, maybe the best thing I can do for the team is step aside.” Lance is a good kid and his heart’s in the right place, but at the same time, I think he kind of assumes everything is his fault somehow. So he’s being very understanding and trying to do something selfless, but really, this is more so about his own problem than Keith’s.

Now, compare that to Keith, who’s asking Kuron how he’s doing, how he’s feeling, what the hell happened? Lance talks to Keith because he’s worried about the rest of the team, and is so wrapped up in his own insecurities he tries to take the blame for everything and reflects it all back on him. Keith in contrast, never makes the conversation about himself, and focuses completely on Shiro’s wants and needs, on trying to reassure him–something that Keith also does for Lance instead of the other way around. Now, this doesn’t make either Lance or Keith better or more caring than the other. It just means that the focuses of these two talks are very different with very diverging outcomes. Likewise, you can tell that Kuron and Keith are a lot closer by their conversation. It’s easy for the two to open up and reach out to one another. Keith’s heart also goes out to “Shiro” in a way that you just don’t really get from his interactions with Lance.

Now, let’s talk about the end of both scenes. Because even then, there’s another parallel. Right when Keith is about to leave, we know Kuron calls him back. Similarly, Keith does the same with Lance. And then? Both Kuron and Keith make a kind of joke that’s meant to put the other person at ease. In the case of Keith, this is especially interesting, because Kuron’s just done this for him. So, when he sees things might end on a bad note, what does he do? Take a page out of Kuron’s book and try to cheer Lance up with a little joke. Now, that being said–while we know it makes Lance smile, there’s nothing that really grabs you about “Leave the math to Pidge,” in the way that “How many times are you gonna save me before this is over?” does. Again, Kuron’s talk with Keith is heavy. Even the humor is somewhat dark and foreboding.

Of course, it’s also very deep and heartfelt. Kuron might not be Shiro, but he has a lot of Shiro’s memories. He remembers Keith always being there for him, remembers Keith rushing in to save him, remembers the overwhelming relief when Keith promises that he’ll be alright, that everything will be okay–that he’ll make it, that nothing’s going to happen to him. It’s incredibly sweet and heart-wrenching. And again, rather than feeling like something you’d hear about someone’s bro, this brings to mind a fairytale romance. Shiro teasing Keith about being his brave knight and always running in to save him. And Keith’s promise that he’ll rescue Shiro “as many times as it takes,” while looking back at Shiro with a smile so warm and fond and completely confident in their happy ending? Yeah, there’s just an aching tenderness to this scene that you don’t usually see. And it certainly feels more in line with something you’d expect from Shiro’s love interest. Regardless of intent, this scene really does read as romantic.

There’s also the fact that, when Keith makes his promise to Kuron, he’s stepping out of the darkness and into the light. Kuron might be left behind there in the “dark,” but Keith is still shown as the person that can bring him back out into the “light.”

#keith #sheith #shiro #kuron #voltron #meta #anonymous

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