#i never thought I'd be good enough for that but I've sold my art more than once 🥺🥺

[maraeffect]

got a lot done 2day and made yummy coffee for myself and redecorated my part of our office and started my new skincare routine (((((:

[pien-art]

-FAQ-

Hello! I've gained a whole bunch of followers lately and I've been getting a lot of questions about commissions, what my setup is, what brushes I use, etc, so I thought I'd make a post about it to answer everyone's questions at once !

Putting them under the cut <3

Commissions:

Commission prices are listed in my pinned post. You can send me a private message about your commission idea and we can get to talking :) It is helpful to have enough references handy (character, outfit, descriptions etc)

I am generally a fast drawer but I also have a job and a physical disability so there might be moments I can't work on your commission. But that is never longer than a few days at most.

Payment is upfront, the full amount and via paypal only. I know this might seem a bit scary but unfortunately there are a lot of people who end up not paying for commissions and I want to avoid that.

During the process I will send you frequent updates and will ask for input, to see if it is going in the direction you want. You can ask for changes during the sketching progress but once I've started on line-art and coloring, no big changes will happen. (You can for example ask for a different color for a shirt etc, but not for a different prop or pose or expression)

When it is completed, I will send the drawing to you via email. The drawing will remain mine and it is not to be sold or profited of by the person who commissioned me. If the commission is for something commercial/for selling, that needs to be discussed. I prefer to do drawings only for personal use!

For more questions, my dms/asks are open :)

How long have I been doing digital art:

I've been drawing digitally for about 5 years now i think? But before that I've been drawing and painting traditionally literally since the moment I could pick up a pencil.

Set-up:

It's just me and my ipad and apple pencil laying on my bed. I wouldn't even know where to begin for those whole multi-monitor/screen setups ;-; I draw only with Procreate

Brushes:

I tend to play with different brushes from time to time to get different textures, but generally i use the same few for most of my drawings/styles. My favorite one is the Peppermint Brush, for sketching. I use it in every drawing i make! I always sketch with it, and often do the line-art with it as well! And it makes for a nice textured brush for rendering as well! (i used it for a lot of rendering of the armor in this drawing)

The (procreate) brushes i use a lot are

for medieval style: inking - Ink Bleed (for line-art) artistic - Quoll (for coloring)

for general style: calligraphy - Chalk (coloring/rendering) sketching - Peppermint (line-art/sketching)

for realism: calligraphy - Shale Brush (full rendering) Also using the shale brush for smudging and erasing when drawing realistic

for lineart: smooth pencil from this pack by Heygiudi

How/why do you choose a base color:

I tend to look at a few different things when deciding on a base color/color palette.

the overall color of the reference pic

the color i associate with who or what i am drawing

the feeling/vibe i want to give off with that drawing

color has a BIG impact on the vibe of a drawing, so it is something i keep in mind when im drawing.

Using a color as a base to start, helps a lot with my drawing process. It helps me pick out other colors so they match better. It helps me get light/dark values right. And the chalk brush i use, has gaps between the strokes, so the base color will always come through a little. Having the same color come through in the entire drawing, helps pull all the colors together if that makes sense? I always start with a solid base color when i am painting traditionally as well!

Advice:

PRACTICE!!! just keep drawing and practice. I know this is such generic advice but truly practice is The Way. Learn from other artists but don't compare yourself to them. Everyone's artistic journey is different and there's no "good" or "bad". And most importantly make sure that you have fun when you're making stuff :3

I also learn a lot by studying art I admire and love. Figuring out what it is I like about it. (for example, the line thickness or the shapes or texture etc), and try to incorporate that in my own style in a way that is not directly copying or stealing.

[awriterinthenight]

"It's ok love", Part 2-Anthony Lockwood

requested: anonymous

words: 3255

warnings: reader's family being horrible, people judging her job and body and how she isn't married, slight misogyny, swearing. (I had a lot of fun writing some of the family dynamic and making up reader's story about her family and I have so much more of her back story to reveal and I'm so excited. Also all of my stories are usually female reader unless otherwise stated, or sometimes no gender is mentioned if I can, but I just prefer to write it like that) thanks for reading, enjoy. Please enjoy, my laptop decided to combust twice while writing this and this took me like 2 hours.

summary: Anthony and reader have arrived at reader's family's place. Anthony is gone for his job and reader is stuck with her family. He comes back to her crying in her room after her family dinner.

The train ride from hell finally ended with Anthony waking me up, telling me we'd arrived at our stop. I got up groggily, reaching to grab my bag, but Anthony stopped me.

"I've got it love," he said, grabbing mine and his bags, carrying them off of the train.

I couldn't help but smile at his act of service. I'd known him long enough to know there was no stopping him when it came to him helping people. He loved it. Doing acts of service for people was his love language, so I never stopped him when he did stuff like this for me.

Leaving the train, we called a cab, and I gave them the address to my parents place. I was nervous the whole ride. Mostly because of how Anthony would react to seeing how rich my family truly was. I know it sounds dumb to be embarrassed by being rich, but it was more of the fact that people would judge me for it and the fact I chose to be an agent. Everyone would always say how dumb I was for running away from such a lavish life, and how becoming an agent, potentially almost dying everyday, instead of staying safe in my family's house and wealth, was such a stupid idea. It was even worse when they would add that I only did it because I was 'rebellious' or 'just a kid' who didn't know what they were doing.

But it's the exact opposite. I'd rather be using my talent for something good than wasting it away. Why sit around doing nothing my whole life, when I can go out and help people. It felt like what they probably told Maria Anna Mozart, when they told her to stop making music, and that she had to marry someone and give up on her dream, or telling Van Gogh to just sit in his depression rather than work his way out through art.

Then again, I was only one agent amongst thousands, but I still believed I could potentially make a difference. Part of the reason people would say stuff like that to me was mostly because I was a girl. I was the oldest too, so I was expected to marry rich, find a good husband, and continue the family legacy. Not, run away at 15 and join an agency, where I could potentially die. Which is also a bad thing according to my family, since because I was the oldest I was their heir, or something like that.

I was so consumed in my self deprecating thoughts, that I didn't notice we had arrived until Anthony leaned over asking, "Is this really your family's house?" he asked, seemingly shocked by the estate and the rather vast size.

I let out a long sigh, "Yup, this is it," I confirmed, opening my door, leaving the car and walking towards the door.

"I knew you said your family was well off, but that seemed to have been an understatement," he said, breathing out a laugh at how big my family's place was.

Moving towards the front door, I take out my keys, unlocking the door, "Well my family had a decent amount of wealth on both sides, which then basically doubled when my grandparents married, then again when my mom and dad married. Then when the problem came around, they were some of the first people to create flares specialized for ghost hunting. Once that made a shit ton of profit, they then sold it making even more, so yeah my family is fucking loaded," I exclaimed, bitterly adding the last part as I unlocked the door.

"Seems like the next seven generations of your family are set for life," he joked, leaning against the wall.

I let out a small laugh, "Try more like ten maybe," I added, opening the door to the place, "And, this is only the east wing we're in. Wait till you see the entire main house."

His eyes went wide at my mention of this only being part of the place, "If this is only part of it, I can't even imagine the rest of the house," he said, in utter amazement of how my family lived.

I opened the door, letting us in as I turned on the lights, "Well, make yourself at home," I told him, walking toward the stairs in the front to head to the bedroom, "This part is actually quite small. Only two bedrooms, or actually more like one. I turned the other one into my own little space for random hobbies, so there's only one bedroom, but it'll be fine," I said, realizing we would be in the same room.

Climbing up the staircase in the entryway, we reached the 2nd floor, turning left towards the bedroom. The room was fairly big, there was a fireplace, a couple couches, a bay window, a desk covered in papers and pens I left, and the massive bed in the middle. Of course the room was painted my favorite color, and had some of the decorations I left. Alongside the posters on my wall that I didn't take down when I ran away.

I watched as Anthony took in the room, "This feels like a toned down version of you," he said, since my room at home was comprised of my favorite color walls that I begged Anthony to let me paint, more decorations than were in here which was saying something since my old room here was still somewhat fully decorated, posters on all the walls, and my room at home always had fresh flowers, since Anthony would buy them for me, even though I never asked him to.

"Well I couldn't take all my stuff when I left, so a lot of it stayed here," I told him, finally walking into the room, after just leaning against the doorway.

Anthony looked at me, then the floor, then me again, "If you don't mind me asking," he started, clearing his throat before continuing, "Why did you leave a place like this?"

I could feel myself partially freeze. I told him that I hadn't really told anyone else, but I never told him anything about why I left, or my family before I ran.

Taking in a deep breath I finally spoke, "I think that's a story for another time. Plus you have a job to get ready for," I told him, changing the subject.

He nodded, not pushing any further, "I should probably start heading out. I'll go call a cab," he said, moving closer to me before leaving, "Have fun, and don't worry about anything, okay," he told me, grabbing me by my waist, planting a soft kiss on my forehead. He rarely ever did this, only when he knew I was anxious or sad.

"Okay," I said, taking a calming breath in and out.

He then left, calling a cab, leaving when it arrived. I could hear the door close and that was when I knew I was alone for a little bit before my family showed up.

Usually before something big like this they liked to spend the day out. Letting the cooks and the rest of the staff prepare, undisturbed by my family's loudness. I took this time to unpack my clothes into the dresser, since I was gonna be here for a couple of days. Tonight was our families dinner, then tomorrow night was the actual party, and the day after would be when the immediate family stays and just congratulates my sister as we all prepare to make our departure for those leaving.

***

It had been about an hour since Anthony left when my family started to arrive. I could see through my window them entering the house, filling in one after the other. My sister getting married was a big deal to them, so everyone from my mom and dad's siblings, to their cousins, to my cousins, to great aunts twice removed, was here to celebrate.

I took a big sigh before heading down to the main house where everyone was. Making sure I looked good enough in my fairly new black dress, smoothing down my hair, and having to tone down my makeup since I was supposed to look like I wasn't wearing anything to create some illusion, or something. I don't actually know, I didn't pay attention when my mom was talking about that.

Opening the door basically alerted everyone of my presence. I entered the reception room where everyone was hanging around in, having a few drinks, and making the same small talk to the people they could and couldn't tolerate.

The first to notice me was my sister who came running at me, as if I had come back from the dead, "Oh I'm so glad you're here," she exclaimed, squeezing me so hard I think she forgot that I had to breathe.

"I'm happy to be here too, especially for you," I said, though she knew the first part was a lie, but definitely not the second part.

She finally pulled back, her eyes widening in happiness, "You have to meet my fiancé," she practically screamed, with a smile so big I'm surprised her face didn't hurt.

I smiled too, since her smile was always infectious, "I will soon, let me just make my way around the room before grandma writes me out the will for not greeting her the second I walk in," I joke, since I was probably actually already written out of multiple wills for running away.

"Okay, okay, I'll let you go, but you have too. Plus I think she'd rather give the dead hamster in the backyard more than us when she dies," my sister adds jokingly, referring to the hamster we had to bury when I was 7 and she was 5.

I take a deep breath, starting to move around the room. The second I see champagne, I quickly grab a glass to help encourage me to stay here and not just run out. Like I said, I started by greeting my grandma on my dad's side, who mentioned how I was 'too muscular' since I was an agent and being in top condition was basically a requirement if you don't like dying. My grandma on my mom's side was actually a lot nicer. Complimenting my hair, asking who my stylist was. She was never horrible, we just didn't talk much since her and my mom didn't get along well. My grandpa on my mom's side was nice too, admiring how I was an agent, and how I was in his words 'saving the world' which I thought was an overstatement.

Next came all the aunts and uncles. If I was lucky I could avoid the bad ones, or keep the small talk to a minimum, only spending time with the decent ones. On my dad's side I had three aunts and one uncle who were blood related. I caught up on some of my family's life from two of my aunts, and got more comments on how 'they could never possibly work such a vigorous job' and how 'I will one day realize how I made the wrong decision. I left those two quickly, heading to my favorite aunt who greeted me with open arms.

She filled me in on the actual family drama, who was mad at who, who divorced who, who was seeing who. She was an amazing aunt, and the only I truly remembered fully by name, the others I only really remembered when asked, or if they were at an event with me. But my aunt Kathy was amazing and always slipped me a couple of extra bucks, or nice shoes.

Soon I had to leave her and head towards more of my mom's side. My mom's side was...well...scary to say the least. They very much believed that I shouldn't be working, especially in a job like being an agent, so I knew I was in for some passive aggressive comments. My mom's side had three uncles, one of them being adopted, and two aunts who were like Madeline and Louise. They always gossiped, but not in a fun way like my aunt Kathy. More in a deceitful way, both of them were on their 4th divorce. I stopped keeping track at some point. Both talked about how my job was a crazy thing to do, and how they remember their teenage rebellious phase.

I left them before I got a headache, moving onto talking with my uncles. Besides that the two blood ones were a tad misogynistic, they were okay. They mostly talked about business, and how sales for equipment for agents was at an all time high, to which I just smiled and nodded, not really knowing what they were talking about.

The adopted one was my favorite uncle. While he wasn't blood related, he was the best in the family. He was always joking, and talked about how his sister was also an agent before losing her talent and becoming a secretary. We talked for a little bit till I spotted the person I was looking for.

My cousin Jade. I found her semi-hidden behind a plant, holding two glasses of champagne, mouthing the words to 'Maneater' as she hid her device that was playing the music she was listening to. I walked up behind her asking, "Are you listening to Maneater at a family party," which startled her.

"Christ, I thought you were one of the aunts coming to scold me," she said, relieved it wasn't one of our aunts, "And yes, it was. Its better than listening to stuffy small talk all night."

"You're not wrong," I said, agreeing with her statement, "Then again, drinking the fountain water is better than small talk." We continued our conversation for a while till we were all called for dinner.

The main dining room was big enough for both my mom and dad's side, plus their partners, and some of the older cousins from each side. The younger kids were sent to the other smaller dining room, where they were served their own stuff, and away from all the adult talk.

Dinner started off somewhat nicely. I stayed talking to Jade, who was next to me, my grandma from my dad's side on my other side, but she ignored me for the most part. Everything was going great, conversation was flowing, the food was nice, and everyone was giving my sister nice compliments and congratulations.

It was perfect, until it wasn't. My grandma who I was sitting next to had to pipe up and say, "You should take less food, no man would want someone built like you," while I was grabbing another piece of chicken.

Almost everyone either quieted down or went silent as her voice projected through the room. My uncle soon defended me, "There's no need to talk like that, let the girl eat." Sadly though that wasn't the end of that.

"Well, if we let her keep being like that then no man will marry her. Especially at this age, her sister is already getting married, and she doesn't even have a boyfriend," she said, meaning every word she said. I was only 20, my sister was 19. It was a one almost two year gap, yet she was still getting married young and before me. I chose my career over marriage, something I apparently wasn't supposed to do but did anyway.

Now others started talking. My two gossiping aunts said how, "Someone would probably marry me. I have to do something once my "talent" fades," putting talent in air quotes, as if my ability was nothing, or how, "Maybe he won't be rich like she was supposed to marry, but maybe she can trick some somewhat handsome guy."

"She's the one who's supposed to inherit their fortune?"

"I'd rather live in a swamp than look like her."

"At least I can get a boyfriend, and not have a job. She can't even get one and her job is just sad." My cousins said, insulting me like I wasn't there.

Everything felt surreal. I could feel Jade rubbing my arm trying to comfort me as she was talking to me, and on the other side of me was my grandma berating me for basically just existing. All the chatter around me of everyone pointing out my mistakes, and how I wasn't married felt overwhelming, making me want to cry.

What was worse though was how my parents didn't say anything. At least my sister tried to shush people and get them to stop. My parents did nothing though, maybe even added to the chatter.

I eventually got up, leaving the room. Tears stinging my eyes, the feeling almost as bad as the one my family made me feel. Jade tried grabbing my arm to get me to not leave, but she let me go, not following so i could have my space.

The second I walked into my part of the house and into my room, I could feel the tears pouring. I was leaning against my bed, trying to let everything process fully.

I didn't think I was that bad looking. I was usually complimented on my style or looks, even hit on once or twice, which I really didn't like, but still I thought I was still decent looking. My job wasn't the worst either. Especially at my age, most agents lost their talent by now, but I still had mine and it was working better than ever. Yet, no matter how much I tried to reassure myself, their comments still got to me.

I didn't even hear Anthony enter the house, or even my room. But the next thing I knew, he was right in front of me, holding me, asking what was wrong. I told him everything. I don't think I'd seen someone more shocked before.

He shook his head, looking me in my eyes, "Your family is wrong. You're gorgeous, don't listen to them," he said, trying to comfort me, "And, you're one of the best agents in the world, and I say that with full confidence. You're amazing, please don't listen to them darling." He held me for a little bit longer, continuing to comfort me.

Soon he got up, getting ready for bed, as I did the same. We got situated in bed for the night. There was only one bed, but we decided to be mature about it and just sleep in the same bed. It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world, and it's just for two nights.

We were originally somewhat far apart from each other, before I turned towards him, "Anthony," I said, my voice rather small.

He turned towards me, "Yes, darling," he said, his voice low and tired.

I took a breath before I asked, "Did you really mean what you said?" thinking that maybe he only said it to be nice.

"I meant every word, love," he told me, moving his hand to wrap around my waist pulling me close to him, "Why don't you get some sleep. Don't worry about it, I'll take care of it in the morning," he told me.

I didn't know what he meant, but I was tired from the day's events, and drifted off into sleep in his arms. He held me close the entire night, my head on his chest, with his arms wrapped around my waist.

Taglist (ask to be added)

@almost-gabrielle @scarlett-8 @archiveoftara

[mickimagnum]

Devin's Dude Ranch: Episode Two (Part Two)

*as Devin reenters the house, she is immediately approached by Albert*

Albert: "Devin, hi. I'm so glad I caught you. How's your evening treating you?"

*Devin smiles widely*

Devin: "It's been good. And yours?"

*Albert flashes a boyish grin*

Albert: "Well. it's better now that I'm talking to you. Hey, do you want to go somewhere to chat?"

Devin: "I thought you'd never ask."

*the next shot shows Albert and Devin on the couch on the back deck. they're sitting with a few inches between them.*

Albert: "Why don't you move a little closer?"

*She looks at him warily, but in a playful way, before settling against him*

Devin: "Alright, but no funny business."

Albert: "Wouldn't dream of it."

Devin: "This is probably better for me anyway. so I don't have to look directly at your face."

*Albert chokes out a laugh*

Albert (confused, but lighthearted): "What do you mean?"

Devin: "Well, Albert. Frankly, you're just too damn beautiful. When I look at you, sometimes my brain just reboots."

*Albert laughs again*

Albert: "That's a new one on me. I apologize for my face. Do you want me to get a paper bag or something?"

*Albert's eyes shine at Devin*

*Devin bites her lower lip and shakes her head, on the edge of laughter*

Devin: "It might help, actually, but...maybe we should just treat it like like immersion therapy. The more I'm around you, the more I'll get used to it, that kind of thing."

Albert: "Alright, but I just want to make sure you know that I will do whatever it takes to make this work."

Devin: "Including wearing a paper bag for the rest of your life?"

Albert: "Exactly."

Devin: "This was a very helpful conversation, thank you."

Albert: "Anytime."

*they make eye contact and instantly break out into smiles*

Albert: "So tell me about you. What got you into training horses?"

Devin: "In short, my Dad. The long version is, my family has been training horses at least since my great-great-great grandfather. It's in my genes, I guess you can say. I've been doing it literally my entire life."

Albert: "That's amazing. And is this your family's ranch?"

*Devin looks steely eyed for a moment and clears her throat*

Devin: "Uh, no. It's not. This one is all mine."

Albert: "Do you not want to talk about it?"

*A weak smile flickers across Devin's face before disappearing*

Devin: "It's a bit of a touchy subject," *she sighs before continuing* "But, like I said, I've spent my entire life training horses, working for my Dad. He got sick a couple of years ago. Lung cancer. But, instead of leaving me the family ranch, who it should have gone to by all rights, it was left to his brother instead. He ranch, the business, all of it. When I confronted both of them about it, they told me a woman had no business training horses or running a business 'on her own.' My Dad died six months later and my uncle, well, he has everything except the monetary inheritance I was left, which I invested into this ranch."

*Albert exhales*

Albert: "That is seriously *bleep*ed up. I'm so sorry that happened to you. And to be treated that callously by your own family .... unimaginable."

Devin: "It was honestly the worst betrayal I have ever known in my entire life. It really is true what they say about people's true colors coming out when someone dies. But, enough about me. Tell me something about you."

Albert: "I would much rather talk about you, but if you insist..."

Devin: "I do."

Albert: "Well, I'm a chef. I used to own a restaurant in San Myshuno, but I hated the administrative side of it and missed cooking. So, I sold it and went back to the kitchen, and honestly, I couldn't be happier with my career re-pivot."

Devin: "Oh, that's amazing. What's your favorite thing to cook?"

*Albert ponders for a moment*

Albert: "I'd have to go back to basics; a good grilled cheese can be a work of art."

Devin: "Aahhh. I was not expecting that answer. I figured it'd be something more gourmet."

*Albert chuckles*

Albert: "Clearly you have some things to learn about me."

Devin: "What an exciting prospect."

Albert: "What about you? What's your favorite meal to cook?"

Devin: "Oh that one's easy. Both to cook and eat; frank and beans."

*Albert throws his head back, covers his face with his hand, and laughs*

Albert: "Wwwhhattt?"

*Devin is now also laughing*

Devin: "You're not the only one that's full of surprises."

Albert: "That is such a cowgirl answer. I love it."

Devin: "I grew up on it! It's like, a childhood comfort food. For most kids it's mac and cheese. For me was it's frank and beans."

Albert: "As long as I can sleep downstairs on frank and beans night."

Devin: "Why? You'll be eating them, too. We'll both be fartin' up a storm."

*Albert bursts out in a loud chorus of laughter*

Albert: "Oh my god, this is the sexiest conversation I've ever had."

Devin: "Hey, this is real talk. This is what you get to look forward if you want to be in a relationship with me."

Albert: "Trust me, I'm looking forward to it so much."

*suddenly Milo appears amidst the pair's laughter. it slowly dies down as they realize he's standing there*

Milo: "Hey, guys. I'm sorry to interrupt. I was just wondering if I could talk to Devin when you're done?"

Devin (who seems a bit caught off-guard): "Yeah, Milo, sure. Just give me a minute, okay?"

Milo: "Yeah, sure. Thank you. And sorry, again."

*Milo walks off*

*Albert sighs with disappointment*

Albert: "I guess it's too early get to keep you all to myself."

Devin: "That's what they tell me."

Albert: "Well then, you go do your thing. I'm going to get a drink."

*Albert and Devin get to their feet*

Devin: "I enjoyed our chat."

*the two enter into an embrace*

Albert: "Me too."

*he cradles her head and kisses her on the forehead*

*As they separate and Devin walks away, she's smiling and blushing. Albert watches her walk away for a few moments before heading inside*

Albert (in diary room): "Just half an hour with this girl and I'm hooked. She's so easy to talk to. I didn't want our time to end. It was hard to let her go. And there's definitely chemistry there, and a connection forming. I hope she feels it, too. 'Cause, man. I can't wait to see her again."

*Looks directly into the camera as a lopsided, boyish smile spreads across his face*

Devin (in diary room): "Albert," *folds her arms at her waist and smiles to herself* "Yeah, there's something about him. I definitely feel the chemistry. I like being around him. It's comfortable. I do have this nagging worry at the back of my mind though...with him being a city boy, I'm not sure if he's really down for the ranch life, you know?"

*camera cuts to Milo waiting for Devin. he looks pensive. Devin is approaching him from behind*

Devin: "Hey there."

*Milo turns see Devin approach. His eyes instantly light up and a warm smile spreads across his face*

Milo: "Hi."

Milo: "How are you? You're still okay from...earlier?"

*Devin offers a reassuring smile*

Devin: "I'm okay. I've been training horses my entire life and have had worse falls than that, trust me."

Milo: "Again, I am so sorry. I don't know what I was thinking trying to pull that off."

Devin: "You were thinking you wanted to make a grand entrance."

*Milo glances at his feet, rubs the back of his neck and reluctantly nods*

Devin: "That's alright, man. That's what tonight was all about, I suppose. But, we're past that now, so it's cool for us to move just on. You've learned from your mistake. And I've learned to dodge you if I see you running my way."

*Milo and Devin both share a short chuckle, before he shyly nods in agreement.*

Devin: "So tell me something else about you, besides the fact you're an accident prone cutie."

*Milo looks up at her startled and then tries to mask it, but only manages to blush*

Milo: "Me? I, uh, I'm a musician. Nothing big, yet. Still tryin' to make it, I guess. I still work a day job and all."

Devin: "I love that. What instrument?"

Milo: "Guitar. And I sing. I write my own music too."

Devin: "Wow. You're a triple threat. I really want to learn how to play guitar. I've just never really found the time."

*Milo's eyes light up*

Milo: "I'd love to teach you!"

*Devin smiles up him*

Devin: "I'd really like that. As long as you promise to be patient with me."

Milo (his voice soft and sincere): "Always."

*the pair stand in silence for a moment, locked in eye contact, smiling at each other before Devin speaks again*

Devin: "So, what do you do for your day job, then?"

*glances down at his feet and begins absentmindedly kicking at the ground*

Milo: "Well, that is less glamorous, truth be told. I work at a burger joint."

Devin: "Nice. Do you like it?"

Milo: "It's not my dream, but it's not bad."

Devin: "Whatever pays the bills, am I right?"

*Milo looks relieved and nods as a smile plays at the edges of his mouth*

Milo: "What about you? How'd you get into making nectar?"

Devin: "Oh, that! I took a local class here in Chestnut Ridge not too longer after I moved here, just a sort of for fun/self-improvement type of thing. Turned out I really enjoyed it and had a knack for it. I decided to use it as a way to pay for the horses until I got my first few trained up and sold, but man, the business just really took off! Now most people know me for Echo Valley Nectar and not the horses, which is exactly the opposite of why I got into it."

*Devin grasps her head for dramatic effect and laughs*

Milo: "Fate is crazy."

Devin: "You can say that again."

*her words are followed by another void of silence as the two steal glances at each other*

Devin: "So, what do you hope fate has in store for you?"

*Milo's eyes search her face as he considers his answer*

Milo: "I think you know one thing I'm hoping for," *he glances away and smiles down at the ground again, clearly embarrassed by his forwardness* "Besides my person to grow old with, a good dog, a successful music career, to see the world, and one day a small family. A lifetime supply of tacos would be nice too."

*Devin can't resist smiling and bites her lower lip in an attempt to suppress it*

Devin: "That all sounds amazing. Especially the lifetime supply of tacos part."

*Milo's laugh rings out. after it subsides he says:*

Milo: "Your turn."

Devin: "Also, my person. Also, a small family one day. Also, to see the world. And I guess just a lifetime of successful horse-training. That's really all that's left that I'm really want to spend my life doing."

Milo: "Well, it sounds like our ideal futures match-up pretty well.*

*the two stand in silence again, smiling at each other*

*Devin begins to shiver and glances over her shoulder back toward the house*

Devin: "It is getting cold out here. Is it okay with you if I head back inside?"

*Milo shoves his hands into his pockets. he looks disappointed, but nods.*

Milo: "Of course, yeah. Go warm up."

Devin: "Thank you, sweet Milo."

*they hug*

Devin: "Oh my Watcher, you're so warm."

*Milo chuckles*

Milo: "I've been told I run hot."

*Devin holds on a few moments longer*

*Milo grins to himself in the extended embrace. he is blushing*

Devin: "Mmm. That's nice," *she finally pulls away* "I enjoyed spending time with you. And I'm looking forward to more. Soon."

*Milo is still blushing*

Milo: "The feeling is very mutual."

Milo, in diary room: "Devin's incredible. She's so kind and warm. I haven't met any other girls like her. And we our vision of the future matches so well that maybe this is fate. Maybe she is the one. Watcher, I hope so."

Devin, in diary room: "Milo strikes me as being a little bit shy. Or maybe he's still in his head from earlier tonight, I don't know. It's making building a connection a little hard. But, I definitely feel like there could be something there. He's an incredibly sweet guy. I can see myself really liking him, but we just have to keep working on our connection to see."

PREVIOUS | NEXT

Albert submitted by @bakersimmer Milo submitted by @belsasim

[shesasurvivor]

What's your headcanon for Katniss and Peeta's children?

How old was Katniss when give birth to their daughter?

How many years apart between them in age?

Your headcanon for their name?

Who gets the singing and art skill from their parent?

Bonus question : please give recs of your fav everlark post-Mockingjay fanfic.

Thank you :)

@curiousthg

So many, @curiousthg! One I'm kind of into, though I'm not really sold on it being my actual, solidified head canon, is the idea that the girl was an unplanned pregnancy that took Katniss (and Peeta) by surprise. Finding out she was pregnant sent Katniss through a whole spiral of emotions that she wrestled with before ultimately deciding she wanted to keep the baby.

I've always placed Katniss as being somewhere around 35 before she had her first child. I give them a couple of years to sort through everything they've been through and figure out their relationship before the subject comes up in earnest for them. That places them around 20 years old when the first conversation comes up, and 15 years later, she's 35.

Well, Katniss tells us that the boy is a toddler, and that the girl is old enough not only to be in school, but to be in a grade that would begin teaching her about The Hunger Games. So I want to say maybe somewhere between 5 and 7 years between them? Sometimes I head canon that the 10 in "5, 10, 15 years" is the girl's birth, and the 15 is the boy's birth. But again, not entirely sold on that idea at all. But yeah, I'd say at least 5 years between them.

I like to follow the naming conventions that Suzanne Collins set in place. For the District 12 girls (at least in the original trilogy), she used a lot of flower names. This is especially the case with the Everdeen family. Yellow blossoms are especially pertinent to Everlark's future family (why I named my short-lived Everlark children series that name). Also, the meadow song is especially important, since it foreshadowed that Katniss and Peeta would one day have children together. As such, I've decided that their daughter's name is Daisy Mellark.

As for the boy, I've never been quite as solid on my choice of name for him, but I usually go with Orion. I like that it ties into mythology (even though it's Greek, not Roman), he was a hunter that is usually associated with Artemis, and I'm drawing a blank on this one, but I seem to remember there being a connection with fire. But the cherry on top? 'Orion' can be shortened to 'Ri,' which, of course, would be pronounced as Rye. ;) All that said and all these years later, I'm still not sold on the name for their son lol.

I always thought that their daughter was probably the more artistic one between the two, and liked to give their son the inclination for hunting. But honestly? They're probably both talented at both their parents' specialties, and it's probably more likely one tends to lean more towards art and one more towards hunting. As for singing, I think it's pretty clear that having a good singing voice seems to run in the Everdeen family, so I think both children would probably have equally good singing voices.

And man, it has been way, WAY too long since I've read any fics about the Mellark kids, and I don't know that I could even remember any at this point! So here's the link to my own mentioned above, lol. (That said, I know there's TONS out there that are amazing! I just haven't had my head in the fandom for a while.)

Yellow Blossoms

[mcalhenwrites]

I was lamenting to a friend about how little I had read this year (compared to how much I wanted to). They mentioned that I was doing my best while juggling two jobs - which led to me adding that I work more than that. On top of self-publishing and my receptionist job, I do take art commissions and I sell amigurumi at events (hate that for me). I'm also going to be working at the dog treat bakery when it shows more profit. (Not a matter of "if" but "when" here, and that's likely within the next couple of months.) Then I pointed out that... I have read 90 books this year so far. It is actually 91, and almost half of them are manga/comics while the other half are novels.

A ton of the books I have read come from libraries, which still is good for authors! And it is very good for the libraries to show traffic. :) I have purchased some or been gifted books this year. I decided to take a photo of the ones I know I've gotten this year, though I can't tell you if they're all here. I remember buying two of these as a reward for publishing Geckos. Hahaha. I'm saving for a car, but sometimes it's nice to reward myself with a book every paycheck, if I feel like I can get away with it.

Oh, and I bought Reverie on kindle for $2 bc it was on sale and I had just started my new job, so I thought it would be an acceptable treat at that price. (Ryan La Sala posted about the sale and I was like, "Oh, I liked The Honeys! I should read that!") I'm really sad that I can't do more. When I was whining, I was partially upset bc I had hoped to catch up with reading online as well. I haven't been that great at keeping up with AO3. I have browser bookmarks of things I want to read just stacked up. There are some authors on tumblr I want to catch up with. I can tell you right now that I love Lily Mayne's stuff and wish I could buy the entire Monstrous series in one go instead of every few months or so with no idea when I'll get the next. I'd love to have more manga, esp if it stops getting published! (Too burned by the past on that one, now I fret about how many I probably will never own and aren't at libraries to read.) So yeah, anyway. I do want to be better! But I did move twice (states and then apartments) and acquire a job and do a ton of other things, I'm trying really hard to stay afloat financially. BTW... NOT buying a book every paycheck might save money in the long run, but is still isn't enough to buy a fucking car or a house, and I'd like to better tolerate my life in the 3000 years it would take for me to save for either one of those. And right now, I'm shifting more toward reading library books and avoiding any purchases of books to save a little. I haven't bought a book in... the last month or so? I'll be so happy when I'm finally secure enough to not just buy books from all the authors I love but afford to always preorder (this is very good for authors!) and gift friends books!!! And commission artists for all sorts of things! And buy prints! I'm gonna give all the love I can! (And in the meantime... if anyone wants to buy my books... hahaha... It would go for a car right now, not books, but hey, maybe if I sold 1000 copies of Geckos, I could also splurge on a nice box of books and hold a giveaway.)

[niratheraven]

I thought I'd share my overall thoughts on G Witch here. This is going to have lots of spoilers for it and other Gundam shows so BEWARE SPOILERS

I haven't been this exited watching a Gundam show since I watched Turn A a few years ago. Waiting with anticipation every week for Sunday to watch a new episode and loving it when it aired felt amazing. Few pieces of media do that for me. I liked the finale. I don't feel that strong about it. I'm happy that the girls had a gayly married ending. Sure I wish we had more, but I would say the same for Turn A, and many other media I've enjoyed. Now, do I think it was a good Gundam show? When I was thinking about this 20 minutes ago in the shower, I asked my self "What is a Gundam show?". Therefore I came up with 3 arguments about what defines Gundam.

Gundam is a show that depicts the disparity between the rich and the poor + giant robots in space. Every Gundam show has a major conflict that drives the characters into action, whether it is Zeon against the Earth federation, or Celestial Being against the world, and in G witch Earth against the space corporations. In the end it's always the big players play with their expensive space toys and the rest suffers because of it. The difference between those and G witch is that the characters are not fighting for one side or the other. We see attempts by Miorine to partially resolve it but in the end the show depicts only the resolution of their personal conflict. UC Gundam never resolved its conflict fully either, but the characters managed to get to the end of their current war while fighting for either side. A new war would always start in the next series. Now, is G witch a lesser Gundam for not depicting fully this major conflict? Maybe, if Gundam was just that. Some could argue that that is just a small part of Gundam, instead they could say:

Gundam is a Shakespearean drama with homoerotic tones written by a jaded director + giant robots in space. The grand conflicts, the revenge plots, the mysterious characters, you can see the Shakespeare influence in Tomino's work who also is a big fan of stage plays and the like. G witch fits somewhat well in that context, but we do get a proper gay relationship between the main characters + Utena references. While this categorization works for Tomino's Gundam, it doesn't feel the same for other Gundam shows, where many of the original drama of Gundam became just a point of reference. The revenge plots and the conflicts became Gundam tropes. The original Gundam became the inspiration for most of what followed it. The context of Gundam's creation was doomed to be lost by the following series in the franchise. And that context being:

Gundam is a toy commercial. The reason why Gundam exists in the first place was to sell toys. That is how a lot of art is created. Someone with more money than they could imagine wants to spend it by hiring artist to create for them. It has been like that since the birth of civilization and it still continues to be. Of course the political drama that Tomino created is appreciated beyond the original scope of the production companies, but Gundam still managed to sell those toys... well not at first, but later it certainly did. G witch has excelled in that department. It managed to create a compelling story that got a lot of people into the franchise and into gunpla. Model sales records asside, G Witch isn't going to be remembered by the fans as the Gundam with the most toys sold. What we will remember is this being the first gundam with a fem protagonist who is also in a gay relationship throughout it. One of the main criticisms of the show echoed throughout the web is that it's not enough. It's not enough episodes, it's not enough conflict, or world building, it's not enough GAY!!! I think one of the shows biggest weaknesses it's also one of its strengths. Its subtlety. The show is very subtle in many of its aspects, like the conflict Earth-space, but the most important one, the relationship between Miorine and Suletta. Their relationship develops in subtle ways. We see a hug, a hand holding, or a conversation between the two in the garden or their rooms. We never see the romantic development fully, but it's implied that it is happening off screen. That would definitely leave an audience starved for more lgbtq+ representation to want more. But, considering the context of THIS particular Gundam's creation, it's a miracle we even got what we did. A while ago I heard about the film Suzume by Makoto Shinkai, who has made quite a name for himself with films like Your Name etc etc. In an interview he mentioned how he wanted to have a fem love interest for the main girl protagonist, but that was not to be because of objections by the producers. And if that happened to a big name director, what about G witch? I don't know what this series went through to even get made, but I can't imagine it had it easy. That thought makes me appreciate its subtlety while also wanting for more. Overall, I loved the show, even if it is not perfect, even if I wanted more out of it.

Also also, I wanted to add in regard to what is a Gundam show, Mobile Fighter G Gundam broke all the rules of previous Gundam, it was so outlandish that it had a poor reception by Gundam fans of the era, but went to be appreciated as one of the best in the franchise. So who's to say what makes a good Gundam? Certainly not its "fans".

[rain-is-moody]

(super long post ahead)

Hello !

I just want to preface this by saying that I'm starting this blog as a way to document and be able to look back more on my life, especially with my journey as a full-time artist. I've thought about vlogging or making short-form videos instead, but I'm not that comfortable being on camera so this is the best option! — thinking of this as a visual diary :)

☆☆☆☆☆

I'm Reign (or Rain, whichever is ok)!

I'm a 26-year-old Filipino artist/designer residing in Manila, Philippines and I own a brand called WE ARE MOODY aka MOODY CLUB.

I feel like I've never formally introduced or talked about what my brand is and how it started to anyone so I guess this is the right opportunity to do so!

To start, Moody Club is a variety brand that aims to tackle everyday emotions in a fun and creative way through art and design! I want to let people know that being moody is normal— or even cool! I'd like to subtly send out the message that you should embrace your feelings, whether good or bad because ultimately, it's part of being human.

The brand was formed in 2019 when I was about to graduate from college. I got a Bachelor's degree in Applied Arts and majored in Visual Design at a small school here in Metro Manila. I always knew I wanted a career in the creative industry and at that time I was heavily into streetwear fashion, so I started We Are Moody Clothing!

^ some of the merchandise I sold in 2019!

It was really fun to make designs and make them come to life, but back then, I had no clue how to operate a brand. I didn't know how to find the right suppliers nor how to efficiently sell online and manage my expenses. To be honest, it was hard especially since I didn't have any connections with fellow artists or entrepreneurs to ask advice from or at least interact with. So, I put it aside and got a job instead. It was a different industry but it helped me earn more income. Unfortunately, however, the pandemic hit, and the place I worked at shut down permanently.

I was struggling mentally during the early months of the pandemic (along with trying to sell baked goods from home aka MOODYBAKES — but this story's for another time!). I felt like time was being taken away from me and that I wasn't doing anything worthwhile. It truly felt like I was running out of time 'cause I was entering my mid-20s as well. Soon enough though I discovered the online journal community — specifically, the K-pop journal and deco world!

It was kind of the start of me "healing my inner child". I was drawn to making more handmade crafts, collage making, and sticker collecting. I definitely found comfort in cute things! It was the outlet I needed. I was also lucky to get to know fellow journal/deco lovers and eventually some local artists.

When I started gaining a following as moodzlover (my journal/art account on Instagram) I got to know KITA, a local artist whom I've admired and looked up to since I was a college student. She noticed my work and asked to collaborate. That was probably how I also slowly entered the ARTPH (local online art scene) community.

KITA X RAIN COLLAB

I vividly remember her telling me to start a shop too so I could sell my art in various forms such as stickers, prints, etc. It definitely motivated me to become a full-time artist like her! (I will be forever thankful for her friendship).

So that's what I did! Fast forward to a few months later, I re-branded WE ARE MOODY/MOODY CLUB and registered myself as a full-time self-employed artist!

I was worried that people might not really like what I make since I took a long break from designing or making art in general (I used to hate drawing in college) but thankfully, I've only been receiving love and support since then!

I've done several product releases, art markets, and collaborations in the past 2-3 years. Just last year, I became a partner artist at a physical consignment store and I was also able to buy my own website! Moreover, I moved from working alone in my bedroom to working in a shared studio space!

I feel blessed to be where I'm at right now but I have so many things I still want to do, and there's a lot of work to be done to get to where I want to be. Honestly, I still think I'm running out of time sometimes, but that kind of thought will always be followed by me remembering the saying, "Everyone has their own timeline".

I know I've come a long way but there's still a long way to go! There may be times when I feel stuck or tired but I still love what I do and I want to continue to make myself and other people happy.

I'd like to apologize if this has gotten way too long but I just wanted to share a little piece of my story!

Thanks for reaching the end of this post :)

You can check out my brand here: @we_are_moody on x and instagram wearemoody.store My personal socials: @moodzlover on x and Instagram @rain_is_moody on instagram

[sabrinatvband]

Fat Evil Women devlog 1

I'm working on a new comic and I thought it would be good to share some notes on its production. I think this will be the only devlog I share publically for this comic; I'll probably include a start-to-finish log with all of the concept art and layout roughs as a tier bonus when I sell this on itch.io later. But, here's a very generous taste.

This comic is eventually going to be sold as a CBR file on itch, but I'm also doing to try printing it on A3 paper [which will be folded] and making a small batch of physical copies to give away. It will probably be 32 pages long. It's going to be an anthology [with one particularly long story]. In other words, it's going to be a complete comic, like one you might buy in a comic shop, rather than something more "informal" in shape. In the future, I plan on making enough of these to collect them in trade paperback form, perhaps as a print on demand book?

So far I've done a couple of layouts and compiled a ton of notes. Work on this project began with a simple two-page layout for a bimbo sequence.

I did all the pencilling, inking, and coloring in between two and four hours I think. The first panel on the second page uses an old drawing of the bimbo character I'd drawn several months ago.

I then made a sequence using a Goblin Queen character I'd created around a year ago. Here's the sequence and the original illustration I'd done. The second incomplete panel is from an old drawing I started but never finished.

Yes, the Goblin Queen who looks nothing like a goblin is meant to be a reference of sorts to the Goblin King from Labyrinth, if you were wondering. Except my Goblin Queen mostly hangs out with dark elves.

These sequences are only meant to be rough guides for the final drawings, but I put way more efforts into my layouts than I actually need to. After making these two page sequences, I decided to do something a little more ambitious.

I illustrated a woman wearing a shiny black dress, and she reminded me of an old indie porno producer character I'd created a while ago named Demonia [please ignore how terrible the old three part sequence looks; I didn't know how to draw fat women yet].

When I started plotting this sequence out in my notebook, it was only four pages long. But I added a bunch of extra panels in later and brought it up to six pages [The numbers are original panels, and the letters are ones I added in after making the first complete rough layout.]

I made some concept art for characters I'd mentioned in the script that didn't have designs yet, as well as a few locations. I then compiled all of that into a CBR file I can refer to while working on the final art [the blacked out bits in the thumbnails are photo references].

I then started work on another sequence that quickly grew beyond the six pages I was initially planning on doing.

A few years ago, when I first started using my Wacom, I illustrated an androgynous spider creature. Much more recently, I started moving overseas and started designing new characters in my sketchbook that I was planning on making digital pieces with later, and I revisited my spider concept. If you overlay the rough spider drawing from the sketchbook page with the digital WIP below, you'll notice I did a whole bunch of warping and stuff to the individual limbs to make it look better.

This WIP will appear in finished form in the spider comic somewhere; look out for it.

Anyways, I decided this spider would be perfect for a weight gain sequence, and so I started making concept art.

This is just a fraction of the concept art I created. I've done at least 15 pages of work for this comic, and a lot of it is exploratory work. In the beginning, I had basically no idea what the plot of the sequence would be, and designing new characters and illustrating scenarios gave shape to the story.

After making maybe three or four pages of sketches, and writing a list of elements I wanted to be in the story in my notebook, I made this rough synopsis of the plot. I then started working on a CBR file for the spider sequence that includes photo references, sketches, old designs I want to repurpose, scans of my notebook, etc.

Work was slowing down in my notebook, and so eventually I made a text document and started writing down panel-by-panel bullet points. Of course this all needs to be adapted into rough visuals, but I covered a lot of ground with this after building my foundation.

You might be wondering what the point of all this pre-production work is. The problem with comics as a medium is that it's extremely time intensive, and so you have to get all of the iterative stuff done long before you put pencil to bristol board for the first time [assuming you only use bristol board during the very last stage of your process].

[Old comic artists were sometimes drawing upwards of 40 pages a month, and they didn't have time to think things out so thoroughly. But for people who aren't drawing multiple books a month, it's been common to do multiple waves of layouts for decades, and this pre-production stuff has only gotten more common. Which is good; quality > quantity. The video on layouts below is a great overview.]

While I was doing layouts in my notebook for this spider sequence, I started working out a page that ended up not hitting all of the notes it needed to. If I'd been drawing by the seat of my pants, it would've been a big problem, but when you're doing layouts with illustrations only two or three steps above stick figure drawings, re-doing a page is not a hassle.

You might be wondering what my actual workflow is for producing finished art. Once I got very used to the feeling of using an Intuos Wacom, I told myself I was going to draw comics entirely digitally. It made a lot of sense; I could use layers, perspective work is a lot easier digitally, and I can fix mistakes and/or warp things a lot more easily.

Over time, I realized I hated doing everything digitally. There are many things that are better digital, like coloring. I prefer drawing pin-ups digitally. But I really don't like drawing an entire page digitally, and I realized my previous serious comic attempts had all petered out when it was time to start doing the final work in the computer, after the layouts and stuff had already been completed.

Of course, I'd tried making professional quality work without computers before. But it's nearly impossible to do that inside of a sketchbook [although I'd drawn many joke comics in highschool using a sketchbook], and using only bristol board I had problems with things like perspective; I have a lot of respect for older artists who couldn't use any digital tools.

So, I've resolved to buy a scanner and printer. I'm going to make final layouts in my art programs that have skeletons laid out where I want them, perspective grids, panel layouts, etc, and then I'll print them onto bristol board using light blue ink [which doesn't get picked up by a scanner]. I'll then do the final pencilling and inking on bristol board, scan those pages, and do any touch-ups and coloring in the computer.

I forgot to mention that none of these comics have words. Perhaps future issues of Fat Evil Women will have dialogue and stuff, but as a conceptual thing this first issue is basically completely silent. When I was making panel grids digitally to start working on some final layouts, I noticed that, when you don't have any speech bubbles, a traditional six panel grid looks way too square and vertical. So, I've decided to make my spider sequence on a four-tier grid, which shouldn't be a massive change. The entire story uses uniform rows, and so it just means moving stuff back. There are no dramatic page-turn moments that will be compromised by this change.

I might have to alter the Demonia sequence as well, but probably not. Since the height of the panels in the two page sequences are variable, I think I'll leave them exactly as they are.

I was planning on including a giantess sequence in this first issue as well, but if I reach 32 pages without it then I'll have to push it to a later issue. But since I'm moving to four-tier layouts, I might end up with a lot fewer pages than expected.

[wildhornsberry]

Something something art something something feelings

I've made more art in the past 12 months than I had in the past 12 years combined. I'm not exaggerating.

I started drawing when I was old enough to hold a pencil. Also not an exaggeration. I got in trouble in school a lot because I spent most of my time drawing (although untreated ADHD was partly to blame), and I stayed doing that until high school. I auditioned for and was accepted to a performing arts high school, and I started off feeling so great about it. Everyone else was really good and I got insecure sometimes, but I generally felt like I was among peers.

I had a friend at the time who was (and still is) extremely talented, and I passed her in the hallway while changing classes. She'd seen a drawing I'd done on the wall in one of the classrooms and she asked if it was mine. I said yes. She said "Yeah, I could tell. You have a really distinctive style." I said thanks. She said "No, it's not good" and then just walked away. Instant shame.

I didn't realize at the time how much that impacted me, but in retrospect, it was around then that I stopped trying to do my best work. I stopped taking my work seriously, stopped submitting pieces for galleries/etc., stopped making art outside of school, and started really phoning it in when I had school projects. And then after that, I just didn't do it anymore. Once or twice in college when I was desperate and needed to pay for something, I sold frankly insultingly underpriced paintings. Outside of desperation? Nothing.

I also didn't realize how much it impacted me when I showed my best friend at the time some fan art I'd done for a book series they thought was stupid (and it was, but ya girl was 13 and v much the target audience), and they told me as much -- that it wasn't good, the books were stupid, and that fan art isn't Real Art. I remembered them saying that to me, but I didn't really get the impact until I decided I wanted to do Ghost fan art and I immediately clammed up and thought it was just a waste of time and no one would be able to take me seriously. 16 years later.

I've been doing the whole Professional Artist thing this whole last year. I've completed 37 individual pieces this year. I have 9 more planned. I've shared almost all of them publicly and all of them have been well-received. And yet I'm still convinced that there's nothing interesting or unique about my work, that each new piece has to be better and bigger and shinier than the piece before it or no one will like me or my work anymore, and that anyone looking at my work is only looking at it to scan for the flaws.

I wonder if those things would have hit me so hard if the other circumstances in my life had been less How They Were (there was a lot going on in my life at that time). Maybe. Maybe not. It doesn't really matter. It's just amazing the impact we can have on each other. Adolescent pettiness set the tone for so much of how I feel about my work. But I guess the point is that my confidence went away, but my creative impulse never did and I'm proud of myself for engaging it again.

Art has been healing for me. Sharing it, even more so. So thank you for letting me share it with you (and thank you if you read this far).

Anyway, that is more than enough earnest for now. I gotta go scream into a pillow k bye

[wozman23]

The Best of Not-E3: Summer Game Fest

I'm still bummed that E3 is no more. I moved out to LA shortly before its demise and thought I'd have plenty of time to attend the event. Yet here we are, in this post-E3 world, with glimpses of the joys of the past like that with Xbox Showcase, and plenty of lulls, like with practically everything else. I think the world of gaming is in a weird place. Development costs are unsustainable. I've said time and time again that the “bigger is better” trend has be ruining games and stifling creativity for over a decade now. Games take way to long to make these day, and the risk is not often worth the reward. Indie games have rebelled against that trend, but all the unique, fun B tier games that used to occupy the space in between are either dead, dying, or under duress. Still, gaming is one of my biggest hobbies, and I can't help but be excited about what is to come the next few years, even if those experiences feel fewer and farther between.

Best Announcement: Alan Wake II: Night Springs DLC

It's no secret that I'm a massive fan of Alan Wake. Don't believe me - look at my last post. So the events started on a high note with Remedy's studio lead, Sam Lake, making another trip from Finland to LA to announce the Night Springs DLC. Seeing him dance his way out on stage put a smile on my face. I was giddy. And then announcing that the DLC would be out the next day came as a surprise. I just finished up the last game I was playing yesterday, and I'm so excited to hop back into the warped, insanely creative world of Alan Wake. I can't get enough of it. I want to see what vision Sam and the team have for where the franchise goes next. And I want to continue to try to string together my own theories about Alan, his story, and how he intertwines with the Remedy Connected Universe. As much as I could easily fall back into my psychosis and make this post about how that announcement was the “Game of the Show” for me, I want to shine some light on the little guys.

Best Indie: Screenbound

The second announcement to blow me away was the indie game Screenbound. It's such a cool concept! And the art style looks so great. I love puzzle-y platforming games, and it looks to mix both genres well. It reminds me a lot of one of my favorites from last year, Viewfinder, which was also love at first sight. And before that there was Toodee and Topdee, which merged 2D and top down game play perfectly. In each of these game's cases, they immediately stood out as games that were looking to take me on experiences that I'd never been on before. Viewfinder and Toodee and Topdee were two of my most anticipated games, and in the end they were my Indie GOTYs the years for those years. Lets hope Screenbound follows in their footsteps.

Best of Show: South of Midnight

I remember looking forward to Contrast from Compulsion Games. We Happy Few was lost on me. But when they showed off their teaser trailer for South of Midnight at last year's Xbox Showcase, I was interested thanks to the rich atmosphere. Now we got a better look at it, with a fleshed out world, some interesting characters, and some game play, and it shot up my Most Anticipated list. I've always been fascinated by the Cajun accent. In almost every case, a heavy accent is a distraction for me. I've always joked that if someone has a noticeable accent, I assume they're dumb. Southern, New Yorkers and New Jersey-ers, all those weird Chicago/Mid-west/Wisconsin/Minnesota accents – all a bunch of dummies. But that Cajun and Creole accent rises above the rest. And here, it is on full display as a love letter to Louisiana. The second that massive catfish showed up, I was sold. He looks cool. He talks cool. He's just cool. This trailer had a lot to take in. A massive gator. Cool looking traversal options. That really cool, stop motion-like animation style. I'm so on board for this one! Apparently it's been drawing a lot of comparisons to Kena: Bridge of Spirits, both good and bad, but I loved that game to death as well, so bring on all the comparisons! I'm always a bit scared when a developer gets acquired by Microsoft. We've seen the ugly side of that with the closure of Tango Gameworks, fresh off their best game Hi-Fi RUSH. And while I applaud Microsoft for their approach with Game Pass, bringing all of their games to the platform on Day 1, I question how profitable that is, and how they decide what is a success and what isn't. And I find it absurd that I can still stream everything via my outdated Xbox One without the pressure to upgrade to a Series X. (Although I recently found my first sacrifice: In Senua's Saga: Hellblade II I couldn't use photo mode since Cloud users stream the PC version which doesn't have a dedicated in-game button for screenshots. But that seems like a small sacrifice to make considering I that by working some gift card deals I just gave them like $150 to play everything they release for the next 3 years.)

Outside of the Xbox Conference, and the initial Summer Game Fest salvo with Geoff, there wasn't much to be excited about. And while Sony did have a show a little while ago – that would have been abysmal if not for Astro Bot – I'd have liked to see more this weekend. I've been critical of Xbox for quite some time now, but they really knocked it out of the park this weekend, at least in terms of putting on a good show. I just renewed my PS+ yesterday, but I feel like I get far more value from Game Pass.

Honorable Mentions:

Doom: The Dark Ages – I loved Doom (2016). Eternal lost me a bit, largely in part due to that one pain in the ass enemy type that felt like it didn't mesh with the series' core ideas of fast, action-packed, brutal game play. Going to the Dark Ages is a really cool twist, and the shield looks like it will be a ton of fun!

Indiana Jones: The Great Circle – I've never seen any of the films. But this feels like a first person, spiritual successor to Uncharted, which I know is a bit odd since the former inspired the latter. And more Uncharted-likes with giant, dynamic set pieces are fine by me.

Deer & Boy – I love cinematic sidescrollers. This one looked so gorgeous and cute. Nothing more needs to be shown for me to add it to the heap of cinematic sidescrollers I'm anticipating. Some join the Pantheon of Greats among the Playdead games, Little Nightmares, and a few others. Others fly too close to the sun. Let us hope this one can keep up with the gods.

Atomfall – Fallout 76 got some new content or something. But I'm over it. Move on. Give me Fallout 5. Atomfall could fill that gap much like Atomic Heart tried to. Let's just hope it strays closer to Fallout in game play than it does to Atomic Heart in namesakes since it was a pretty big letdown when I played it at launch.

ASTRO BOT – The dissolution of Sony's Japan Studio was disheartening. They made some great games over the years. One of my favorites being the criminally underappreciated Puppeteer at the end of the PS3's life cycle. It was such a creative piece of art. The amount of love that went into shaping its world, aesthetic, characters, bosses, levels, and game play variety was absurd. It felt like they out-Nintendoed Nintendo. The game sold so poorly that I believe I may have bought the only copy. From there, Japan Studio went on to make a few Astro Bot demo experiences for PlayStation VR, then fleshed out a terrific full game, ASTRO BOT: Rescue Mission, then baked ASTRO's Playroom into the PS5. All were brilliant platformer experiences that Sony needs more of. So it was bittersweet when it was announced that most of Japan Studio was being shuttered, with the only remaining team being ASTRO BOT's Team ASOBI. ASTRO BOT and Puppeteer seem to share a lot of the same design philosophy. They're super creative and feature some really great boss design. I have to assume that some of the developers who worked on Puppeteer are still working on ASTRO BOT. And I'm really grateful for their contributions. Sadly, outside of this, most of the big Sony studios are in between games right now. We really don't know when Naughty Dog will release something next. Marvel's Wolverine probably still needs some time to cook. Sucker Punch's future is unknown. And the same could be said for countless others like Santa Monica and Housemarque. Usually I walked away from E3s and Not-E3s really excited about what's on the horizon – oohh, we don't know what Guerrilla is doing... what's on the horizon for Sony and wondering what the heck Xbox is doing. But this year they pulled a complete switcharoo. Also the Lego Horizon game could be fun. Let's throw it in this category.

[casspurrjoybell-17]

Heart’s Choice - Chapter 40 - Part 1

*Warning Adult Content*

Carlos

John's house is quiet and lonely without him and if I didn't have Becky and the dogs to keep me busy and entertained, I'd quickly lose my mind in the quiet stillness.

His late brother's style leaned towards industrial chic, making the place look more like a museum or a modern art gallery than a home, I wonder if it's too soon to talk about redecorating, once John gets back.

If he ever does.

Whatever business David and he had with the vampiric council lasts longer than the promised 'few days.'

Soon, days become a week, which now stretches into two.

At first, John had texted me with regular 'if brief and cryptic' updates and called in the evenings, though he didn't 'or maybe couldn't' tell me much about what he'd been up to but on the fourth day, he sent a single text in his characteristic broken-lined, emoji-free style, which read almost like a poem.

Hurts too much to hear your voice Be home soon Sorry

After that, I hadn't heard from him and he hadn't replied to my messages or returned my calls.

I guess he'd turned his cell-phone off but that didn't stop my imagination from running wild and taking my anxiety along for the ride.

The best I can do is to keep myself busy and between the dogs and figuring out what to do with the rest of my life, that's easy enough.

"What about your shop?" Becky asks as we sit together one evening on the titanic leather sofa in the lounge.

She's leaving for Sacramento in the morning, where she has a job and a life of her own to get back to and we're spending our last night together eating pizza and playing with the dogs.

"Can't you just move? Start again?"

I take a bite of pizza to avoid answering right away.

Once the crime scene had been cleared, the county had taken possession of the garage, along with the rest of Lucille's estate.

Even if I'd been able to continue renting the space, I wouldn't have wanted to.

The thought of all the hours I'd spent working with the bones of murder victims inches beneath my feet still makes me shudder.

It would have been worse for Kyle, had he lived to know it, as those victims had been his parents.

Poor kid.

"Not easily," I say at last.

"Especially not now that I've sold most of my equipment."

I'd had little choice.

Sure, I could have rented a storage unit while I hunted for a new rental site but all of that costs money I don't have.

I poured everything into my business, put all my eggs in one basket, as my aunt would have said and now it's gone.

At least I got some money for the tools and machinery.

Not much, given it was already used when I bought it but something and something was better than nothing, which is another thing my aunt used to say.

Rick comes trotting over with his favorite stuffed rabbit in his mouth and presents it to Becky, inviting her to play tug-of-war with him.

She takes hold of it and lets him tug away to his heart's content while she talks.

"You know, David is far from my favorite person," she says.

"But if nothing else, I have to admit he's always been there for John. He's offered to write John a blank check several times, though John never accepted it, he'd have made a wonderful father-in-law, if he wasn't so damn creepy."

Sensing that she's missing out on the attention, Morty joins us as well, resting her head on my knee and shoving her muzzle beneath my hand.

I scratch her ears and smile distractedly.

I'd taken her and Rick to the groomer earlier that day, so their coats are clean and shiny and they smell pretty good, for once.

"Call me stubborn but I prefer to make my own way, if I can. I relied on my aunt for long enough, I want to stand on my own two feet, even if I have to crawl at first and yeah, I'm aware of the irony of saying that while living here rent free."

I nod at our expansive and expensive surroundings.

John could sell this place for several million dollars, if he wanted to.

"Speaking of your aunt," Becky says, keeping her tone carefully casual.

"Have you had any word?"

Sighing, I leant into the creamy, genuine leather cushion at my back and stare up at the exposed beams of the high ceiling.

"Nope. Nothing but I guess I'm getting used to that."

Morty whines and Becky reaches over to rest her hand on my arm.

"Another thing about David, if I trust him with nothing else, I trust him to take care of John. They'll be fine. As for your looking for your aunt, have you thought of hiring Freya?"

"Freya Hunter?"

She gives me a look.

"How many people named 'Freya' do you know?"

"Fair enough but Freya's a bounty hunter."

"Exactly. Finding people is literally her job."

"Finding people for a fee," I remind her.

"I'm broke."

The look she's giving me grows more intense.

"Carlos, I've known the woman for two weeks and I can already say with absolute certainty that you're practically family. I'm sure she'd take it on if you asked."

I shrug and wince.

"It's complicated. You know how I explained that the Morellis were demon-hunters? Well, my family was the same. We mostly stuck to the incorporeal shit but we weren't above shooting werewolves or staking vampires, if the chance arose. Speaking of vampires, you're taking all this really well."

It's Becky's turn to shrug as she serves herself another slice of pizza.

"People are people," she says.

"I figure vampires and werewolves and whatever else is out there, are just people, too. Like John and Freya and you. Everybody just wants to be happy and most people are good."

"I'm glad you see it that way. Good or not, I think most people would have run screaming."

[ombrellica]

Hello! I've had an exciting month. A lot of good things happened to me. For finishing the set of drawings in the last post I treated myself to a pink dsi xl. This colour was never sold in my country so I took a risk and ordered one from overseas. In my memory the dsi xl was the best way to experience ds games. I kind of wish I was able to keep the one I had when I was younger, but that is life. I really love the colour of this dsi xl so maybe it was for the best. I was also pleasantly surprised to see the zelda game in the list of dsi ware redownloads. It's a little shame that this was in fact the only game downloaded onto the ds during the lifetime of the dsi shop. But hey if you only get one game to choose from, zelda is many people's top picks! I may soft mod the console in future to get my hands on nostalgic dsi ware games. I've had a huge blast playing Pokemon Heartgold. I caught a shiny metapod:

It's name is Red Moon! Also this month has been a very big month for me with gacha. I've been saving on and off over the last six months for these banners.

First up is Tears of Themis.

I got the anniversary Atrem! I am currently working to get Vyn too. We're on hard pity. Aw. I am waiting for the sharing returner code to refresh so I can save 180 s chips. At this point I might as well hey? I was also lucky enough to win a copy of the thank you letter from the twitter raffle. It hasn't arrived yet, but I am watching that letter box closely.

In a surprising turn of events, Oberon dropped on Fate Grand Order on the same day as ToT anniversary!

People were debating online when this servant would be available. Many people thought the banner would start a week after the release of the story. As you can see I earned this servant for free. While not always diligently, I have been working towards saving for this character since January.

I've never announced it on tumblr before but I am actually quitting this game. Now that I am becoming serious about my art stuff I don't really have the time for a game that requires a looooot of commitment and investment. Also the magic is pretty much over for me with this game. Since last year, I've been skipping a lot of dialogue and doing the bare minimum. I think the last time I enjoyed a fgo event story was the summer camp one. That was so mysterious and filled with thrills! I was one of the players who thought my game was playing up because of the gender swap shenanigans. I think fondly of that memory.

I've been looking forward to Oberon ever since I first heard about him years ago from the jp fans. Np 3 is really a nice way wrap it all up. I sort of want to get revenge on the Douman banner from last year. As far as activities are concerned that's over, but I may for a time passively collect login bonuses. But honestly if I stop feeling like doing that halfway, no hard feelings.

Finally we have Genshin!

Wanderer was guaranteed so the more exciting thing here is the r2 weapon! I wasn't sure if I'd get the weapon at all so I didn't prep for it to avoid disappointment. I'll get onto leveling it up soon! The other exciting news is this patch was truly made to celebrate Kaeya! Not just the costume: I also got my final constellation for him as well as a weapon!

I am so happy with how July unfolded. I ended up taking a break from art to emotionally process a recently resolved issue from my past. How do I say this... It's finally over now but it had affected the way I lived my life for a decade. I am going to live more peacefully for now on. Be less afraid and be apologetically like myself. That kind of thing.

To finish things off today, here's a picture of a little dog that passed away nearly a year ago. I still think about him. Stay safe stay well.

[living-undead]

I didn't really have a good way of presenting this before, but using SQOTD seems like no better way to do so, so I'll make this the way I go about this.

I'd first like to take a second to mention all the blogs that are actually the reason I even started using Simblr and getting into playing Sims heavily, modded or otherwise, due to their amazing posts, amazing edits, amazing cc and/or their captivating Simstyle. Blogs like @pralinesims @sammi-xox @nv-games and @squea I might as well refer to as the genesis point for me deciding to join Simblr to begin with; I had always had a fascination with Sims for a long time but I didn't realise the community behind it was so expansive and diverse, and I love that I was able to experience all of that thanks to them. 💜

I would also like to send some love out towards the people that welcomed me into the Sims community with such open arms. My very first EVER mutuals on Tumblr and the people who, whenever I would post or talk about something were there, reblogging, interacting, even just being kind for the sake of being kind, always having the best energy, etc. If it weren't for @miralure, my very first mutual, such a positive light in my life. @virtualfolk, an absolutely inspiring individual who was my second ever mutual, thank you so much for being such a beacon and congratulations on developing such a beautiful blog! @matchalovertrait and @ruthplaysthesims, Y'ALL ALREADY KNOW, Amy and Ruth have ALWAYS tried to include me in any events, ask games, mutual love spreading, etc. that may happen on this site and I always know that if nobody's got me they do. @nanamail, one of the most talented visual artists (and yes, I consider what you do with your posts ART) I have ever seen, someone I will always consider a friend and always think so highly about. And finally, @nigmos, one of the realest mfs on this damn website. Someone who I consider to be such amazing, kind, caring individual with so much love to give it's insane. I probably wouldn't be nearly as active as I am now. Just knowing that I have them in my corner makes my day. 💜

I would also, finally, like to acknowledge the blogs that have inspired everything about how I play Sims, blogs whose posts I always feel inclined to reblog whenever I see them on my dashboard, blogs that I don't know if I could live without because of how amazing everything they do is; blogs like @venriliz who I definitely consider a friend at this point, someone whose renders are not only awe-inspiring but also so brilliantly devised it makes me feel like every inch of it was meticulously placed. @pearlean, I don't know how else to put it that hasn't already been said. Every post they make is like a master chef getting in the kitchen, locking in and deciding to make a dish so good it looks like an episode of Food Wars. PLEASE never stop being such a creative light! @kuroashims, what can I say? I like One Piece, Elfy likes One Piece. I like Sims, Elfy likes Sims. AND GOD, ARE THOSE SIMS SO FUCKING COOL!! I don't think I'll ever get over how PERFECT they look for the characters. @circusjuney, Hi June!! 👋🏽 Don't mind me I just wanted to say that your Simstyle is a huge inspirtation to me and every post you make is so beautiful... anyways I hope you're having a good day :). And @elderwisp literally, quite simply, so graciously, so seriously... YOUR STORYTELLING IS AMAZING!! Everything about it is part of the reason I've tried to start developing compelling lore for my OCs and everything you put out is so well-thought out I wish these were books sold on shelves more than Sims tbh 😭.

Anyways, I think I've rambled on for long enough. To any and all who I have not mentioned in this post, I wish I could go on forever because you all are lights in my life but I feel like I've rambled for long enough; know that you are loved, you are appreciated and everything you do, every like I give, every reblog I do, every message I leave is genuine and I absolute appreciate all of you and everything you have done. I hope you all are having a wonderful day, and if you aren't I hope tomorrow will be the best day of your life. Take care of yourselves. 💜

Also, another more public happy birthday to @linalinsims! 💜💜💜

📩 Simblr question of the day: any other simblrs that you love?

answer in whatever way is most comfortable for you and feel free to share this SQOTD around, make sure to use the hashtag SQOTD and tag me in separate posts ~ 💛

This question was contributed by : @/missmoodring ~thank you for the SQOTD contribution~ (This is question 7 out of 10 that they have contributed :))

[cartoonsaint]

I'm loving your thoughts on the hlvrai characters! Can i ask your thoughts on Forzen for the ask game?

YEA I FUCKING LOVE FORZEN HE'S SO FUNNYYYYY also i love that they had scorpy double up sjfdljasdf like rtvs is a pretty big crew they couldn't find?? ONE other person?????

FAV CANON TRAIT: alright so there's lots of ways to interpret forzen and i know that "someThing like benrey" & "old enough to be shipped with other characters" are popular but they're not my favorite bc taking him at face value is just. so amusing to me. SO my fave trait is: he just wants to graduate!!!!!

sure maybe he's an older student but my first thought was 'COLLEGE??? this man's a BOY?????' like i am a year out from 30 (yay!) and let me tell you there's leagues of difference between who a person is at 20 vs a decade later. 20 is a KID. he's only just stepping into adulthood and he's fucking HERE, at black mesa? not just in the military (YIKES, not good for anyone, but the draw of a college education and upward mobility can be really tempting) but in the middle of an alien invasion?? and then his entire team dies and he STILL puts himself directly at odds against the bizarro super murderous science team??? and then has the guts to fucking try to talk his way out of it with BEYBLADES, and that WORKS???? and then he somehow kidnaps the immortal dog of the most murderous guy on the team (who also was the one most swayed by said beyblades) and has the chance to try to negotiate for himself... only he can't even articulate what it is that he wants?????????? honey u could have just gone home. the military's dead and gone man i don't think they're all that concerned about ur college education rn

this young man's only got a fraction of an idea of what's going on, but dammit he's got guts and he's gonna give it his all anyways!!... and then his all goes so, so badly. god, how silly. how wonderful. unstoppable object but it has no idea what direction it's supposed to be going so it just goes in circles and doesn't end up doing any damage whatsoever.

LEAST FAV CANON TRAIT: why why WHY does he speak french. he's canonically the last surviving member of the UNITED STATES military, not canada's so why does he speak french why would he do it in the middle of a hostage situation why pLEASE

FANON PET PEEVE: this is not quite a pet peeve but i do laugh every time i see it: there seems to be a lot of post canon domestic-y art that just... ignores him? forgets him? actively excludes him? like the whole crew will be there, the science team and benrey and sunkist and the g-man and darnold, and everyone's alllllll happy and together and forzen is just. never even mentioned, at all

why?? cuz he was a boot boy? benrey is some kinda effed up space god thing, bubby sold gordon out to the military, coomer tried to kill him with 300 clones, the g-man fucked around with gordon's life for the sake of his son's bday party. they've all done terrible things but they all get to be part of a happy, hopeful ending. and all we know for certain that forzen did is be part of a truly shitty organization (and, um, hold a dog hostage... but come on, sunkist was in no real danger), which to me doesn't seem like enough to exclude him from like. a future with happiness?

post canon domestic stories are about forgiveness, aren't they? they're about making up for what happened and finding common ground? about learning and becoming better people? forzen, ex-military ex-dognapper and outside of the hell that was Black Mesa, lost in life and probably never gonna graduate now, running into the group of people he'd expect to hate him most... only to find that he's actually welcome? that's a story i'd love to hear, is all.

also i think it's so easy to be funny with him. pleeeeeeeeease please use him more please i've never asked before <3

[mcalhenwrites]

A break from social media and how I use it has really been good for me. I need to be careful not to be sucked back in again. I should aim to mostly just post updates, but I do want to talk about my characters/writing as well. I will continue promoting my book, and ofc my Patreon and KoFi which are both "MCalhen" ;) I've been thinking about taking most (not all) of my fics and original works out of the private collection on AO3. I have a dilemma with one fandom (it's a nightmare circus of drama and several authors were chased out or hurt well before me), but I hope to eventually have the nerve to overcome that and say, "Too bad, you have to put up with the existence of my writing alongside yours. Get over it." Another thing is that Rascal isn't coming out of the collection. I plan to delete it. It's getting edited, I'm adding a couple of scenes I think would benefit the storytelling, and I'm publishing it. :) I'm on the fence about whether or not to release the original Seasons with comments closed, bc while it might be fun to compare it to the new one... so many things have been improved. Maybe it's also important to realize that if someone is that fixated on saying an earlier draft is permanent, that's a them issue and has nothing to do with me. A lot of my current WIPs are divided between if I'm going to publish them or post them on AO3. I have a few that I'm uncertain about either way. I want to share some work for free, and I have some stuff that's dark enough, self-publishing isn't much of an option right now. Note that when I promote my patreon and kofi, it's for original writing and art. No fanfic or fanart. The only link it has to AO3 is that I draw sketches of things from original stories posted to AO3. I will never post commercial links to the site, as that is against TOS. Seasons will always be free. Which leads to another thought: I wonder if I could get away with crossposting it to any sites? (I considered fictionpress.) I'm feeling better and want to keep sharing my work. I want to keep monetizing some of it. I want to be an author. I also really want to share things for free. Seasons is one of those stories that resonates a lot with people, and I know how badly I've always needed a story like that told. It's why I write, is to tell stories I need. But that one is... uniquely special and personal. I always want it to be accessible without any paywall. But I still need to make a living. So some books will be sold. Some will not. Just slap me if I ever get to be one of those big names who thinks I can do whatever I want, like those people on AO3 who say that they won't update their fics unless you pay them on patreon. (That's something you report to AO3 as a violation btw) I don't know where a good place to ramble about my stories is - probably here, since people can send me asks about characters and stories - but I'd like to do that, bc I enjoy doing it. :'D Anyway, I have my goals mostly figured out. Maybe someday I can post more of my work without hiding it away (yes, what you see is a fraction of what I write). Maybe I can also publish and make enough money to afford things I need, including a house with a yard and garden.