#i never really bought the fact he was having an affair i hated his ass 4 other reasons but honestly this has drawn me in | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lovecinnatwist · 4 years ago

Note

Please tell me that Dick leaves Kara, that he and Jason get happily together.

It feels like it’s been 100 years but here's another chapter!

The Cost of Freedom Chapter III

Warnings: Includes Omegaverse, Cheating and Angst

She didn't show up.

Even after she told him she would, she still didn't show up.

Dick's body aches and hurts in a way that makes his insides twist. His thighs are damp and sticky with sweat and slick, the emptiness between his legs echoes in his chest. The first thing he feels after bitter disappointment is rage.

She lied to him.

He can't stand being in the nest for another moment. It smells too much like Kara, her sunny fragrance clings to his skin like an absent lover. It makes him sick. In his fury, he rips the entire thing apart. He pulls everything that's her's out of the nest. The blankets, the pillows, the fabrics- he wants none of it.

He tears everything of hers out with a stinging sense of justice. He flings it all as far away as he can. He can't stand to look at a single reminder of the alpha.

His frustration doesn't ease, even after he gets rid of every trace of her from the nest. Dick's glad for the plastic cover over the mattress. Like this, he doesn't have to worry about her scent sticking to it. It satisfies him but only for a moment. Soon his eyes snap to the closet.

Rage turns out to be an excellent motivator.

He feels intense pleasure in ridding the bedroom of everything that's hers. Things she's bought him, her clothing, her scent. He pushes it all out into the hall. Then with a brush and bucket, scrubs the place down. He does the window sills, the grout, every place where she could possibly live. It helps, but barely. There are traces of her everywhere.

It takes him the entire day to chase her out. He moves the bed from the centre of the room to up against the wall. It's a safe position and this way he can sleep with his face to the door. It leaves a big space in the middle of the room. One that he readily knows how to fill.

Once he makes up his mind, he starts moving Kal's things into the master bedroom. The crib is the first thing he gets. He arranges it right next to the bed, where he can readily get to it during the night. Then, he gets the baby's clothing and places it in the dresser where Kara's once were. It works out perfectly. Then from there, it's easy to drag in the rocking chair and make his den cosier.

He dumps his alpha's belongings in the nursery. Unable to will himself to at least fold her clothing or put them into the dresser. She doesn't deserve his aid or his kindness. In fact, a voice inside his head whispers that he should burn it all.

He narrows his eyes and for a moment, considers it.

'You’ll eat those words, and it won’t be me who feeds them to you.'

Jason's voice rings in his ears and cuts through the haze of rage.

Jason.

He thinks of the alpha for the first time in days. Jason had never been hesitant. Not with him or their relationship. With a cocky, confident smile, the other alpha made him feel special. To him, Dick's something irreplaceable. A treasure to be cherished and cared for with the utmost diligence. During the entirety of their affair, Jason never stood him up, never lied to him, and never disappointed him.

Jason loved him.

Dick's heart flutters at the thought.

Love.

Unlike Kara, Jason didn't need him. The alpha saw him and chose him. That fact alone fills him with awe. Butterflies flutter in his stomach.

" I fucked up. "

The sudden urge to see Jason strikes him like lightning. He needs to apologize. He needs to tell Jason that he had been right about everything. He wants to run out of the apartment and find the alpha immediately. It wouldn't be hard. He would probably be at Big Al's, or maybe down at the Red Hood Motorcycle club.

His keys are on the kitchen table, he could grab them, get on his bike then ride out and never look back. He bites his lip and starts towards the kitchen. Nothing but him and Jason on the open road. Kicking ass and taking names just like in the good old days.

His keys are just insight when something makes him lose his footing. Dick curses as he stumbles to catch himself. He grips the wall, looking around for whatever almost made him twist his ankle.

All he finds is one of Kal's baby blue socks. He reaches down to pick it up. It must have fallen off when Lois came to pick him up a few days ago. He chuckles. They were almost too small for him now. Soon it would be time to get new ones.

Something wet rolls down his cheek.

Dick reaches up, his fingertips come back damp. He lets out a shaky breath that becomes a sob.

Kal.

Like a cup ready to overflow, one tear breaks the damn. There's no way to stop himself. The sudden well of emotions makes him shake. He picks up the soft smell of milk and baby powder from the small scrap of fabric. It makes his heart clench.

He never thought that he would become a parent. Kids weren't a thing in a freescape. There's found family of course, but settling down? Absolutely unheard of. Even in his daydreams, he never let himself want it. Now that he's had it though. He doesn't ever want to let it go.

Jason might love him in all the ways he wants, but Kal loves him in ways he never knew he needs.

Hot tears fall with fervency, the sting of saltwater makes his eyesight blurry. It never did matter if Kara came or not did it? After all, no matter how their relationship fell apart, he would always stay.

He would never leave.

It's that thought that teeters the last of his composure. He cracks. Fat tears spill down his face until he can taste them in his mouth. He can't keep himself from weeping.

He cries for his baby, his sweet Kal who he never wants to be apart from. He cries for the loveless relationship he's caught in and will never leave. He cries until every vulnerable part of him is bare, and there's nothing left but soundless screams.

Then he screams at who he's become, who he's let himself be. He hates everything, but more than that he hates himself.

He's so busy wallowing in his own sorrow that he doesn't hear the soft click of the door. Not until it's too late. Kara's sunshiny aroma presses against him. It's nowhere near as bright as it usually is. While typically Kara can light up a room, right now she seems just as small as Dick feels. Teary blue eyes stare at teary blue eyes.

" Are you leaving?"

The question hangs between them so heavily, Dick feels like he can reach out and touch it. His throat feels raw. He can't bring himself to move from where he's standing. He feels weak. Like he's lost all the strength in his body. He's burnt himself out on rage, and all that remains now is defeat.

" No- No, I'm not. "

He doesn't want her to see him like this. He doesn't want to look weak. He's quickly starting to learn, however, that wanting things doesn't mean you'll get them. He hates the relief he sees in her expression. He hates that he can smell it in her scent. His heart clenches, and the words fall out before he can stop them.

" I'm having an affair. "

Kara grows deathly still. Dick's pulse picks up as he watches for her response. She doesn't say anything for what feels like an eternity. He can't read her body language. He expects her to be hurt, disappointed or maybe even furious. Instead, all he gets is a small broken smile.

" I know. "

The words cut through him. The alpha looks at the floor, seeming to be searching for what to say next. Dick can't bring himself to look away. His mouth feels dry at her admission. Of course, she knew, she had super senses. This thing between him and Jason had been going on for months. How did he really think he had hidden it from her?

Kara flexes her fingers several times. She looks just as beaten as Dick feels. Guilt twists in his stomach and makes him feel sick. He wants to run away from her. He doesn't want to face the truth.

Kara peers up at him, and it becomes harder to breathe.

" Maybe we should sit down? "

He's reluctant to take the offer, but she sits in the single couch leaving him the love seat to himself. Carefully he creeps over and curls up on the furniture. It's new and soft. Something Kara's brought them from the Garden. He looks at the paint, carpet and decor. This has been their home for so long now. He can barely remember what it had been like to sleep in his old dusty shack.

He doesn't look at Kara, and she doesn't look at him. It makes things somewhat more manageable. He isn't sure who's turn it is to speak. He licks his lips, trying to think of a way to broach the conversation. He doesn't want another beat of silence to stretch between them.

" You didn't show up " It shocks him how soft the words are. He doesn't recognize the anxiety in his voice. He reaches for the edge of his pants and plays with the hem. He wishes he could summon up some of the anger from earlier, but all he finds is fatigue.

Kara sighs and Dick can hear her shifting on the couch. He risks a glance. She looks torn, her brows wrinkle where they crunch together, and her mouth is in a frown. Dick swallows and her eyes flicker to his.

" I was going to, I tried to- "

She looks genuine as she speaks. She can barely keep eye contact with him, her gaze quickly falling to the rug. Dick wants to reach out and soothe her but more than anything he wants answers. His omega is right at the surface, begging to know the truth. He barely realizes he's wreaking of distress until Kara's own aroma shifts to comfort him.

" I couldn't do it. I tried and made it all the way to the bedroom. I wanted to be with you, but when I thought about what I would have to do- "

Her voice chokes off, and Dick has to stomp down an omega whine. He wouldn't console her. Not when she left him for days to ride out his heat when she told him she would be there. She closes in on herself, posture crumpling.

" I know that I should be able to, I know that it's natural, but- "

Dick can genuinely see her hands trembling. Her skin is growing paler by the second, while shame peppers her scent. Even without seeing her eyes, he knows what kind of expression she's making. He won't support her, but he can't help leaning forward in his seat.

" The thought of doing it makes me sick to my stomach. Whenever I think of going all the way- of being intimate, all of a sudden I'm nauseous. "

Dick wishes he could bite back his pathetic whimper. Kara's eyes snap to his and then she's standing. The sight of her up on his feet makes him skittish. He presses back and away from her. He doesn't get a chance to run before she's backing off. Her hands held in front of her in a submissive posture.

His heart pounds in his chest, it's loud enough he can hear it in his ears. He watches Kara for signs of movement, but she stays perfectly still.

" I'm sorry- I'm so sorry Dickie, I shouldn't have lied to you. I was just so scared you would leave us. I thought maybe if I could do it, you would stay. "

Her words hit him hard. The familiar feeling of disappointment sparks to life. The more desperate she becomes to explain, the more defensive he feels. He's on his feet before he knows it. His omega right with him, roaring in his head.

" So that's what it was? The only reason why you said you would. Was to stop me from leaving? "

Dick hates that the words break his heart.

He doesn't realize he's inching towards the exit until she reaches out.

" Dick wait- please wait. "

He shouldn't. He should get right out of the house and as far away from her as possible. His legs don't move though. He just stands there with his throat burning. Another fresh round of tears starts to fall before he can stop them. He feels like he's going to suffocate. She stares at him helplessly.

" I didn't know what else to do. You started seeing Jason and I panicked. "

It hurts more than a slap to the face, his guilt cools off any remaining flames of frustration. He opens his mouth to defend himself, but nothing comes out. There's nothing he can say. What would he have done if he found out Kara had been seeing another omega behind his back? The answer that creeps to mind almost sounds ominous.

Whatever he had to, to keep her.

" I was so lost, Dick. Kal loves you, and when I felt you distancing yourself, I had to do something. I know what it's like to grow up without a mom. I want better for Kal. I don't want to be the reason why he grows up without you. "

Dick wonders if she knows her body is trembling. If she knows that the look of sheer panic on her face makes her look breakable. He can smell nothing but desperation and fear. It's thick enough in the air that it makes him feel sick. He fights with his instincts before reluctantly deciding to comfort her.

It isn't much, just a hand on her shoulder. It must mean a lot more to her because soon she's crumpling in his touch and folding into his arms as if she belongs there. He freezes, this close he can smell everything in her scent. The betrayal, the fear and the anxiety hangs around her like a dark cloud. He squeezes his eyes shut.

" I don't want Kal to grow up without me either. "

Kara tightens her grip just enough for him to feel her strength. He squeezes her back.

" Do you love me? "

He doesn't know why he asks her. Right now things are so delicate between them, it's probably the worst timing. He feels her tense in his hold. It's as clear an answer as words would be.

" Not the way you love me. "

It hurts less than he thought it would. Hearing it out loud is awful, but more than that it feels like he's finally able to exhale.

"Thank you for being honest. "

They stand like that for a while, in an awkward half embrace. Dick doesn't bring up the fact that Kara is getting his shirt wet, and she similarly ignores his uneven breaths. The exhaustion from his heat and the emotional conversation starts to catch up with him.

" We should break up. "

Kara's breath hitches, but she doesn't say anything. Carefully, Dick untangles himself from her.

" Kara I love you, and I love Kal, but this isn't healthy for either of us "

Her eyes are red around the rim. She only holds eye contact for a few seconds before looking away. She gives a small hesitant nod.

Dick takes both her hands, and it somehow brings her attention to him. He's too tired to smile so all he does is look. He takes in her beautiful face, her wild untamable blonde locks, the freckles that splatter over her nose and stores it all in his memory.

" You and me? We'll always be GCG and always be pack. That won't change no matter what, but I think it's time we do what's best for both of us. "

He can face his actions honestly now. As much as it hurts, he knows that this is the right thing for both of them. Kara looks up at him with lost blue eyes, and it makes his heartache. He still loves her. Maybe he always would.

But as she said it, it's a different kind of love, and for her, it isn't romantic.

" I am sorry for cheating on you Kara."

She doesn't say anything, her eyes drop to the floor. Her scent betrays her hurt.

“ I deserved it.. “

When she folds her hands over his chest, he feels her emotionally distancing herself a bit. He pushes into her space a bit to force her to look at him.

“ No. You didn’t no one deserves that. I’m sorry. “

Her eyes get misty again making him do the same. His heart aches for her and the guilt squeezes his throat. He doesn’t know what else to say.

" What happens next?"

It’s a good question, he hadn't thought that far at all. He shrugs before taking a few steps back. The weight of the week crashes into him with enough force that he nearly staggers. All he wants to do is shower and sleep until this entire conversation feels like a faraway dream.

" You tell me Alpha. "

Kara's attention snaps to him so fast he thinks she nearly breaks her neck. He can't help the tiny minute smile that slips onto his lips.

" You still trust me with that title? "

Dick doesn't hesitate. " I trust you with my life. "

She takes a step forward to touch him, but seems to realize her place and stops. Dick watches the battle on her tear damp face. The conflict, he feels it too. It won’t be perfect, and it won’t be fixed right away but it’s a start.

Kara offers him a hand and he takes it. It burns in his hands warm like the sun. He soaks up her touch.

“ We’ll figure this out. Somehow. For Kal. “

He shakes her hand. Her gratitude and appreciation peppers the air like perfume.

“ For Kal. “

#The Cost of Freedom #Ficlets #JayDick #Omegaverse #gotham city garage #DickKara #Angst #Cheating Fic #Asexual-Kara

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jalapeno-princess · 4 years ago

Text

Treat You Better

Mark Tuan X Reader

Genre: Angst with a bunch of terribly written smut ahaha idk why I keep trying to write smut I can’t write smut to save my life

Word Count: 12.6k

Warning: Intended for 18+ audience; cheating, degradation, riding, oral (both male and female receiving) face fucking, doggy style

Summary: Mark was at the club with a few of his friends when he spots you walking in all alone. Knowing the kind of person you were, Mark was well aware that you hated the night life. You were the definition of homebody and you weren’t a fan of clubs or bars which made Mark confused seeing you making your way in to the dimly lit establishment. Not wanting anyone to take advantage of you. he finds himself walking towards you with the intentions of making sure you were safe. He then finds out that you were there to find someone to get revenge on your boyfriend Jackson with. As much as you hated the idea of one night stands and sleeping with strangers, all your rationality was thrown out the window as soon as you found out Jackson had been cheating on you with his receptionist. What started off as an innocent little dance with Mark turned in to riding him in the back seat of his car and it’s in that moment of lust that you find out Mark’s true feelings for you.

A/N: Hey guys! I’m back at it again with an extremely rushed story and I’m not too sure when I’ll have the time to write again but I hope you enjoy this story. It’s based on a song called “Soliá” by Bad Bunny which means “Used to” in Spanish. I’ve been getting in to his music a lot these days and even if I don’t speak a word of Spanish, I love each and every one of his songs (they’re actually almost all about sex hahahaha) but he’s an amazing artist and I love how he speaks out for those who can’t use their voices. If you have a chance, definitely go check him out he’s awesome and so is this song.

She arrived alone, she went out without her friends Revealed, in alcohol looking for a way out From that fake relationship Baby, I saw how you look at me I repeat it to you in case you forget it Send him a message that says To not leave you alone Because he could lose you If one day he sees you again From me, tell him to not leave you alone Because he could lose you If one day he sees you again

Mark was quick to turn his attention to you the minute you walked in to the club. Although it was extremely dark besides the strobe lights moving around, the music was blasting and almost every single person there was grinding upon one another, he couldn’t help but let his eyes wander to your curvaceous figure the minute Yugyeom pointed you out.

He had to do a double take; when the younger boy nudged him and motioned towards the entrance he almost didn’t believe it was you. Everyone who knew you personally was aware of the fact that you hated bars and clubs and never understood why people would spend so much money on alcohol and having a bunch of sweaty bodies pressed up against you.

Curiosity got the best of him; why exactly were you there and better yet, why were you alone? If anything, Mark would’ve expected you to be there with your group of friends; they were always out on Friday nights and Mark saw them every now and then but you never tagged along. Maybe they were already somewhere in the crowded room and you were going to meet them.

There was a tiny voice in the back of his head, the one that cared about you more than he probably should that told him to go up to you and make sure you weren’t messed with by one of the drunk and visibly horny men. However, he knew not to get involved whenever it came to you. He knew that you’d never put yourself in a dangerous situation; but with the outfit you were wearing, a short, red dress that stopped right at the beginning of your thighs and hugged each and every one of your curves, he was sure you were going to be the star of the night.

You looked extremely beautiful and Mark couldn’t find it in himself to take his eyes off of you. Your hair that was normally thrown up in a messy bun or neatly tied back in a ponytail was currently down in bouncy waves. Even from far away, he could tell that you were hardly wearing any make up and it was something he always admired about you. If he was being honest, there were many pretty girls in the club wearing outfits similar to yours and even more revealing in attempts to catch the attention of men.

However, you didn’t even have to try to look as sexy as you did; it just came natural for you. From the moment you were introduced to one another, he noticed that you weren’t one to care about your looks or what you wore. You cared more about your job, your personality and your desire to help others rather than your appearance and what people thought about you. In his eyes, you were the most beautiful girl he’s ever met both on the inside and out.

He wasn’t used to seeing you so dolled up. You were always so shy and modest. If you weren’t wearing your scrubs for work, you’d either be in jeans or sweats and even then, Mark would find himself staring at you in awe of your beauty. But seeing you with your breasts and ass on display for the first time since meeting you over two years ago was driving him insane. This is his favorite look on you so far. Before he could process what he was doing, he found himself walking towards you; he didn’t even feel the need to tell his friends where he was going.

All he cared about in that moment was going up to you and finding out what you were doing there. The closer he got to you, he could feel his heart racing. This was a mistake; he couldn’t stop the gut feeling that you were upset with him and you had every right to be. Yet it didn’t stop him from tapping on your shoulder once he finally made it over to where you were standing. As soon as you turned around and a soft smile rose on your face, he released a breath of relief. He’s been beating himself up about the entire situation for the last couple of months.

When he first found out that your boyfriend Jackson who just so happened to be one of his closest friends was cheating on you, he wanted nothing more than to find you and tell you the truth. Sure, they’ve been friends for over ten years and he’s only known you for two, but he knew cheating was wrong especially because you didn’t deserve it. Everyone and their mothers knew just how much you loved your boyfriend. You gave him everything and more on a silver platter. Whatever he needed, you got for him or did for him without complaining. Your sole purpose was to take care of him and make sure he was both happy and healthy.

Mark was always envious of Jackson. Not only was his younger friend more outgoing and very friendly on top of being very muscular and athletically talented, but he had you. When Jackson first told their group of friends that he was in a relationship, none of them could believe it. Jackson was the definition of a fuckboy. All throughout high school and college, he was infamous for sleeping around with almost every girl in their grade. There was even a rumor that he hooked up with everyone on the cheerleading squad and although it wasn’t confirmed, Mark wouldn’t have been surprised to hear that it was true. Jackson was a crowd favorite; all the guys on campus wanted to be him and all the girls wanted to be with him.

That’s why he couldn’t believe Jackson was ready to settle down and commit himself to one girl. The first day he met you stayed in the back of his mind for the last two years. He was quick to pick up on how soft spoken and introverted you were. Probably because he was exactly the same. It was obvious that you and Jackson were the complete opposite of each other and the longer Mark got to know you, the more he felt like you deserved better.

In the beginning of your relationship, Jackson was such a gentleman. He was quite the romantic; took you on cute dates, bought you flowers, opened doors for you and always pulled out your chair. He was also very vocal to his friends about how much he loved you and how he thought you were the one. Never in a million years did any one of them think that Jackson was going to find someone that made him want to change his playboy ways, but you did and they still had a hard time understanding how.

Unfortunately, temptation got the best of him once a new receptionist was hired at the company Jackson was working at. Being the overly friendly person he was, he’d start small talk every now and then with her, but then it grew in to more and one night he found himself fucking her up against the wall in one of the storage rooms.

He knew it was wrong, and he never hated himself more than in that moment knowing that he cheated on you; the only person whose ever meant anything to him but he couldn’t find it in himself to stop. Nor did he want to break up with you no matter how much he knew you didn’t deserve it. Two months in to his affair, there was one night he went out with Mark, Jinyoung and Youngjae to a bar and he got a little too drunk.

Only four shots in, he began going in to explicit detail about his little dalliance with the receptionist and it took every bone in Mark’s body not to jump across of the table and sock him in the face. How could he do that to you? He told the guys that he had no intentions on giving you up because you were the best thing that’s ever happened to him yet he talked about his coworker as if it was the most normal thing to do. As if there was nothing wrong with fucking someone behind your back.

Jinyoung tried his best in keeping Mark calm; he was the only one that knew of Mark’s feelings for you. Mark knew it was wrong to develop feelings for his best friend’s girlfriend, but it was inevitable. You radiated such a bright and positive energy. Although you were always to yourself, even when you went out with their group of friends, Mark was one of the lucky ones who got to know how you really were. You were very passionate about your job; as hard as being a nurse was, you loved helping people in any way possible.

He got to spend time with you every now and then if he went to Jackson’s place and since the two of you both worked at the hospital, you’d eat lunch together every so often and sometimes you hung out even without Jackson being there. It was in those moments; watching your eyes light up as you talked about your love for cake boss, seeing you practically stuff your face with ice cream and hearing on you talk on the phone with your mom that Mark found himself wishing that he could be more than just a friend. He wanted to be the lucky guy that loved you.

Mark has never felt this way about anyone before and you weren’t even his to be fond over but here he was, mentally beating the shit out of Jackson and wanting nothing more than to rip that dress off of you. During one of your lunches together just a few weeks ago, you expressed to Mark that you felt as if there was another woman in Jackson’s life.

First it started off when he started contacting you less and you understood that he was busy, but so were you and yet you made it your priority to make sure he was eating all his meals on time and getting enough sleep. Then came the excuses as to why you couldn’t hang out together and the cancellation of dates. You confirmed his infidelity when you were over at his place one day and found a thong in his hamper that obviously didn’t belong to you. When the first tear fell when you were explaining everything to him, Mark could physically feel his heart sink to his chest.

The confession was at the tip of his tongue, but it wasn’t his place to tell you no matter how badly he wanted to. It had nothing to do with his loyalty to his younger friend, Mark was willing to drop his entire friendship with Jackson if it meant getting to be with you. But he didn’t think he should be the one to relay the devastating news, which is why he confronted Jackson and ended up giving him a black eye almost three days ago. They ended up getting in to a heated argument with Jackson confronting Mark about having feelings for you and Mark telling Jackson to let you go.

Jaebeom and Yugyeom had to practically rip their older friend off of Jackson or they were sure he would’ve sent him to the hospital. Your boyfriend might have been more muscular, but Mark was physically stronger. For someone with such skinny arms, he could throw a punch.

“Hey, what are you doing here? You’re not alone are you?” He was trying his best not to look at you up and down, especially because now that he was closer to you he had a better look at you and your breasts were ready to pop out of your dress. Jackson was an idiot for cheating on you. Not only were you breathtakingly beautiful and right now you looked lethal, but you had the biggest heart and Mark felt like you deserved the entire world and more. He wanted to be the one who got to experience your love.

Jackson no longer deserved it; no longer deserved you and Mark didn’t care what happened between the two of them anymore, he was going to make sure you left Jackson for good.

“I came here by myself actually. I really don’t know why you guys come here so often, this place is bullshit. But I think you and I both know why I’m here. I don’t see him here, he’s with her right now isn’t he?” Although you looked eerily calm, the words bitterly fell from your mouth and Mark could feel his chest tighten at the realization that you now knew of your boyfriend’s affair.

“Y/n—“ you put your hand out in front of him and shook your head. You were there to get drunk and had every intention to end up in bed with someone later that night. If Mark were to say anything to try to defend Jackson or if he were to lie, you’d probably decide that you made a mistake in coming to the club and leave before the night could really start. You may have considered Mark a good friend, but you had a huge feeling he knew his friend was cheating on you and didn’t feel the need to inform you. His loyalty was with Jackson or so you had thought.

“I’m here to have a good time and to find a reason to move on. Don’t worry about me Mark. I’ll be fine. I’m a grown woman, I can take care of myself.”

When Jackson first asked you out over two years ago when he met you at one of his trips to the emergency room, he found himself falling for you faster than he’s ever done with any girl. There was something about you that was different; that stood out from all his one night stands and flings that never lasted longer than a month. To your surprise, you had a few friends that knew who he was and they informed you of what he was like; how much of a womanizer he was and how he never dated anybody.

You told yourself you didn’t want to get involved with him and that you wouldn’t allow someone like Jackson to take advantage with you, but being the kindhearted person you were who tried so hard to see the good in people, you allowed him to take you on a date which led to many more throughout the course of your relationship. Jackson both told you and showed you with his actions just how much he loved you and loved being with you. You were excited knowing that out of all the girls he’s been connected to, that you were the one who ended up changing his ways and that you were the first girl he’s ever been in love with.

Everything seemed to be going so well in your relationship and you couldn’t be happier. However, as soon as he began growing distant towards you, you couldn’t help but feel like there was a reason behind it.

Hearing that you were there alone worried Mark; especially because he saw the way a lot of the men in the club were looking at you with so much lust and fervor in their eyes. He wasn’t a mind reader, but he knew a lot of the guys probably had the same idea in mind and he cringed at the thought of someone taking advantage of you. You were extremely vulnerable in that moment and for you to come to the conclusion that you wanted to go to the club with the intention of letting one of these disgusting and undeserving men get to take you home later on made his skin crawl. Which is why he didn’t find it surprising when he began following you to the bar with every intention of keeping an eye on you.

“Mark, I said I can handle myself—“ the glare he sent your way was chilling, but it also excited you. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t find Mark attractive. In fact, there were some days that you considered him better looking than your own boyfriend. He had the softest heart shaped lips, the prettiest brown eyes with the cutest little mole underneath his right one, a well-defined, sharp nose and such a breathtaking smile.

Whenever the two of you talked, you could never keep your eyes off of him. But it wasn’t just his charming good looks that had you swoon over him. It was how gentle he was; how he treated you like you were the only girl in the entire world. How he looked at you with so much admiration and adoration. How he made you feel important; made you feel things Jackson never made you feel once in your entire relationship. Since you were so in love with Jackson, you never got to admire Mark in that way. You were so blinded by love, that you failed to pay attention to your surroundings.

That was until you found out Jackson was being unfaithful; then you began seeing Mark in a different light. You started falling for his sweet words; how he would compliment you on something only he would notice. When you colored your hair a lighter shade, he wouldn’t stop going on about much the color change brought out the color of your eyes and made you even prettier than you already were. Not even Jackson would notice things like that. He always made time for you, put effort in checking up on you and told you the lamest jokes to make you laugh. These days you’d hardly ever receive a hello from your boyfriend.

The more time you spent with Mark, the more you began losing feelings for Jackson. You also finally came to the realization that you deserved to be treated the way Mark treated you. But Mark was off limits. There was no way you could be anything more to Mark than a colleague at work and someone who was dating his friend. You hated cheaters and the idea of cheating made your skin crawl, but you wanted to get back at Jackson for doing it to you.

Although you didn’t think he even cared about you or what you did anymore, you wanted to hit him where it hurt. When you took your first shot of tequila, you hated how strong it was and how it burned the back of your throat, yet you found yourself downing two more and right before you could take another one, Mark grabbed it from you and downed it himself.

“Hey, slow down. Take it easy, the night is still so young y/n.” You rolled your eyes at his comment and began looking out at the dance floor. The patron was starting to kick in and you wanted to let loose.

“Hey Mark?” He saw the glint in your eye and he knew whatever you had on your mind couldn’t be good, yet he found himself humming in curiosity.

“Dance with me?”

Today she wants to dance all night long, eh She is almost single I don't introduce anyone to her, that make her bothered Total, at the end of the night she has what she wants The moon already indicated to her She posted something on her story, someone got mad Her song played and she dedicated it She says she wants to do it with me good, huh Let the windows fog The girl is grown up, how can someone scold her Don't ruin her night, huh The Kardashian is no longer for Kanye There have been many disappointments, eh Lies from all of these assholes, eh Once again they failed her She would give it a chance, but she ran out

Mark should’ve said no. There were red flags going off in his mind, but he didn’t seem to care. At all. His friendship with Jackson was nonexistent at the moment and he didn’t want you dancing with a stranger with evil intentions. You were oblivious a force to reckon with, but at the same time being quite the lightweight, you were already a bit tipsy and Mark knew you wouldn’t be able to handle yourself if he did end up leaving you all alone.

Heat rushed to his face when he felt you reach for his hand and intertwined it with yours. Your fingers were fairly smaller, but your hands fit perfectly with his. As soon as you made it on to the dance floor, you wrapped your arms around his neck and began dancing. A soft giggle fell from your lips when you noticed how timid and flustered he was being so close to you. He hesitantly placed both his hands on your upper back but they didn’t stay there for too long. With the courage you didn’t think was possible for you to have while you were sober, you brought his hands down to your lower waist and continued to move your hips gracefully to the music.

“Don’t be such a hardass Mark. If you’re gonna dance, do it right.” Oh he was hard all right. He was hard as soon as he saw you over twenty minutes ago. It was inevitable for him to get so turned on by you. He’s had a crush on you for almost two years now and here you were, smiling up at him while swaying back and forth to The Weeknd. After a couple of moments, Mark finally let loose and allowed himself to dance along with you. He never wanted this moment to end. You looked so free; so in your element and he wanted you to always be this happy.

He craved to be the source of your happiness and he knew he would treat you the way you deserved to be treated. The two of you were in your own little worlds that you failed to notice that his group of friends were looking directly at you and everyone but Jinyoung were so confused. Why was Mark dancing so freely with you knowing that you were his best friend’s girlfriend? Did he not feel the least bit of weird knowing who you were and that it was wrong for him to have his hands so close to your ass?

None of them said anything about it though and they were all still so upset with Jackson to want to tell him what was going on so they all pretended like they saw nothing. The next song was a little more sexual, and you didn’t even think as you turned around and began grinding on Mark. Your mind was too clouded with alcohol to realize what you were doing could jeopardize not only your friendship with Mark but his friendship with Jackson. However, you couldn’t find it in yourself to care.

Feeling his hands make their way down to your hips as he helped you gyrate your ass against his hips sent chills down your spine. As the song continued to play, your movement became more rough, causing Mark’s pants to tighten even more than they already were. He was hard as a rock and on the verge of coming by the feeling of your plump ass rubbing against his cock. Once this song was over, he was planning on excusing himself to the bathroom to fix the huge problem in his pants but not before bringing you to his group of friends so that they could keep an eye on you.

You however, had other plans. The hardness against your ass caused the coil in your stomach to tighten and you could feel the wetness between your thighs growing when Mark started to thrust upwards. When he brought one of his hands up to your chest and cupped one of your boobs, you released a soft moan. At this point, all your sanity was thrown out the window and before you could process the entire situation in front of you, your lips were on his.

The kiss was rough; you barely gave Mark any time to prepare before smashing your mouth against his and he knew he shouldn’t be taking advantage of you since he was aware that you were inebriated, but he couldn’t help himself. He’s dreamt of learning what your lips would taste like and feel like molded against his own and now that he knew, he wasn’t going to be able to get enough. His hands playfully squeezed both your ass cheeks before cupping your face in his palms and deepening the kiss. It was rough; your teeth began clashing against his and both your tongues fought for dominance.

Mark felt as if his entire body was in flames; but at the same time he felt like a bucket of cold water was thrown on him and woke up each and every cell in his body. To his dismay, you pulled away to catch your breath and before he could reconnect your lips together, you went on your tip toes and whispered in his ear.

“Let’s get out of here.” He felt embarrassed at how eagerly he nodded in agreement and followed directly behind you as you made your way towards the exit. His mind was too busy being filled up with the thought of what the two of you were going to do that he didn’t even think about letting his friends know that he was leaving and he didn’t even think he could make it back to either of your places. He wanted you now. Even if it meant taking you up against his car in the middle of the parking lot. Once you both made your way to his truck, he headed straight for the back seat with every intention on fucking your brains out. You didn’t even have to say anything; although he wished he asked you what you wanted to do first.

He wanted to make sure the two of you were on the same page, but before he could speak up, you were pushing him down on the chair and reconnecting your lips together. You brought your hands up to both his cheeks and kissed him like your life depended on it. Although he was kissing you so passionately and intensely, you could feel like he still wanted to be gentle with you and the idea made your heart flutter.

“M—Mark.” With the way he was looking at you with an unfamiliar look in his eye that looked like a mix of adoration and something you couldn’t put your finger on, you wanted to show him just how much he meant to you. You took one of his hands and brought it down to your extremely soaking pussy. “Fuck me. Now.” His eyes widened in shock and he didn’t think you of all people; the shy and gentle y/n who had a hard time telling patients bad news because her heart was so big who also couldn’t tell the barista in the cafe that her order was wrong was capable of having such a dirty mouth on her. He felt his resolve slowly coming to it’s end at the feeling of how wet you were and he was so close to just saying fuck it and taking you right then and there in any and every position possible. But being the gentleman he was who cared about you, he wanted to make sure that you were doing this for all the right reasons.

“Are you—are you sure about this y/n? I don’t want you doing this because you want to get back at Jackson. Honestly it might even be the alcohol talking for you and I don’t want you doing something like this while you’re not in the right mind. Knowing you, you’re probably wanting to do it right now because you’re vengeful and want to hurt Jackson the way he did with you, but I don’t want you to regret this—“ you placed a sloppy kiss on the corner of his mouth to get him to stop talking before sliding his index finger back and forth along your entrance; collecting all your juices that he caused when he pressed his hard on against your ass.

“I want this Mark—I’ve wanted you for quite some time. I came out tonight to get fucked by a stranger so that Jackson and his infidelity no longer clouded my thoughts but now—now I want you to fuck me so hard that I can’t walk for the next week. I’m not drunk at all, I sobered up the minute I felt your erection graze my ass. You—you’re all that I want Mark. Please—fuck me.”

You didn’t care how desperate you sounded and you felt ashamed for sounding so needy, but you’ve dreamt about having sex with Mark on numerous occasions and now your dreams were going to become a reality.

“You don’t have to ask me twice baby girl. Lay down for me, I’m gonna make you feel so good. Gonna let you know how much I’ve been wanting this—how long I’ve been wanting you for. Gonna eat this pretty pussy of yours and then I’m gonna rearrange your guts. Understand me baby?”

You let out a soft whimper at the term of endearment. Only then did you process his words and your heart speared at the idea of him harboring feelings for you. There were a few times that you felt Mark held some kind of feelings for you. You don’t buy a donut every single day; their favorite donut to be exact for someone you considered just a friend. You don’t stay at work for an extra hour waiting for someone you considered just a friend to finish work so that you could take them home yet Mark seemed to do that for you almost every single day.

If his shift ended before yours did, he’d wait for you no matter how long he had to wait for just so he could take you home. You questioned his feelings for you so many times, but you kept lying yourself by saying he did all those things because he was a good friend and wanted to take care of you for Jackson’s sake. Mark placed you down gently before placing his knees on either side of your hips. He left a chaste kiss on your lips before slowly making his way down your body. He started off at your neck, licking and sucking on the soft and delicate flesh.

You let out a breathy moan when you felt him bite down all but gently on your nape and you were sure it was going to leave a mark but you were more than excited at the thought of him giving you a hickey. After loving on your jaw and neck for a few minutes, he made his way to your breasts and kissed both of them lightly before practically yanking down the top part of your dress, exposing your beautiful mounds and he grunted when he saw that you weren’t wearing anything to protect them.

“Fuck—do you have any clue how fucking beautiful you are y/n? And how intimidatingly sexy you are? Do you have any idea, how many eyes were on you tonight? This dress—you knew exactly what you were doing when you put this dress on tonight didn’t you baby? Mmm, you like that huh? Like me calling you baby don’t you y/n? Your tits are so fucking huge and so pretty. Who knew you were hiding such a beautiful rack under all those stupid scrubs. I’m gonna take good care of you tonight—gonna make you feel so good. Jackson will be nothing but a name by the time I’m done with you tonight. Now sit back and enjoy the ride baby.” He engulfed his mouth around one of your breasts before massaging your other one and toying with your nipple.

The feeling of him loving on your chest was such an indescribable feeling. His mouth was warm against your perky breast and whimper fell from the back of your throat when he brought your nipple in between his teeth. He continued his ministrations for a couple of minutes, flicking and nipping at one of your nubs while twisting and pinching on the other. Your hands absentmindedly made their way in to his hair and you couldn’t help but tug on it as he fastened his movements. When you felt him groan against your mounds, probably because of the grip you had on his hair, you sighed in content. He pulled his mouth off of your breast in order to show love to your other one but not before informing you exactly how much he enjoyed sucking on your tits.

“How does it feel for you y/n? Feel good? You like how my mouth feels sucking on these pretty titties of yours don’t you? Because I know I do. Just give me a couple of minutes to spend on your tits then I’ll make my way down to your cunt. Okay? I’m gonna take my time with you tonight—gonna show you how perfect you are and how you don’t deserve anything but the best.”

Although the two of you were doing something so naughty, you couldn’t help but smile at his sweet words. However, when you felt his tongue licking circling around your other nipple before completely taking whatever he could fit inside of his mouth, your lips formed a small “o” at the feeling. During your relationship, you and Jackson had sex multiple times and you’d be lying if you said he wasn’t a good lover. He was great in bed.

Not only was he rough, but he was also very naughty and always whispered the dirtiest things in your ear while he pounded himself inside of you. However, he was more focused on himself; he’d always expect a blow job every single time the two of you had sex but he never ate you out unless he was in the mood. Another thing you could do without was the fact that he only cared about whether or not he came. There was nothing wrong with him wanting to make sure he reached his orgasm, you just wished he be more adamant in wanting you to receive the same pleasure.

The way Mark was taking his time learning each and every curve while showing love to every one of your body parts made your head spin. It was one thing for him to say you were beautiful but it was another thing for him to prove it with his actions. The longer he spent on your breasts, the faster warmth grew between your legs and as much as you loved breast play, and you loved the feeling of Mark’s mouth sucking and nipping on your chest, you needed his mouth sucking on a different body part of yours soon or else you were going to lose it.

“M—Mark.” He pulled his mouth off before looking up at you with his cute little doe eyes.

“Yes baby?” You reached for his hand and brought it down to your core, cupping it all but gently so he could feel just how wet your pussy was.

“Please—touch me—eat me—fuck me with that pretty mouth of yours. Do anything Mark please—“ he giggled softly in to your neck at how submissive you were acting. How could someone sound so cute while begging for head? Even if the two of you had yet to do anything really, he knew he wanted to have you again and again. As many times as he possibly could. Thankfully Mark didn’t seem to be the teasing type; he made his way down to your thighs, pulling your dress down and taking it off completely.

“Fuck—how can you—you can’t be real. Shit y/n, I know I’ve said this countless times already but you’re so fucking sexy.” Soft kisses and a couple of love bites were left in his wake as he gently grazed his hands along your sides. Once he finally made his way down to your entrance, he left multiple kisses on the inside of your thighs. Absentmindedly, your hands found purchase in his hair, gripping softly when he blew a cool breeze against your core.

“Such a pretty pussy—so so pretty—“ He took no time in licking a strip along your clit. His tongue was firm and solid as he lapped up all of your juices. Both feeling and hearing him hum against your cunt tightened the coil that was building up in your tummy. He continued his licks but didn’t take too long before he brought your clit in between his lips. The feeling of him nibbling and sucking against your nub felt like heaven. To add to your pleasure, Mark pressed a sloppy kiss at your core and leaned himself away from your cunt so he could bring two of his fingers up to your entrance.

“Wanna feel how tight you are for me y/n—wanna see if you can handle me later—you already taste so good baby, let’s see how well you take me. I wanna see the effect my tongue is having on you.” Countless moans began falling from your throat and you could feel your eyes roll to the back of your head once you felt his fingers make their way in to your tight walls. One of your biggest weaknesses were Mark’s fingers. You always found them so long and skinny. Whenever the two of you ate lunch together, you’d take notice how pretty his fingers were as he’d write something down or whenever he played video games, you’d watch as his fingers would flick at the controllers so swiftly and you’d find yourself wanting to know what else his fingers were capable of.

Having him scissor you open while continuing his attack on your pussy with his tongue was driving you to the brink of insanity. Whenever you’d find yourself daydreaming of what making love to Mark would feel like, you always imagined it to be an otherworldly experience and as you have his face buried in to your core, you couldn’t help but feel as if it was even more than that. His pace with shoving his fingers in and out of you was relentless. And God, the feeling of his teeth grazing against your over sensitive folds would forever be etched in to the back of your mind.

“Mmm—Mark—so so good—I’m almost there—f—fuck.” Your wanton moans and breathy curses only drove him to go harder and you couldn’t stop the screams that filled his car. It was getting too much for you to handle and with the way Mark was grinding himself in to the chair to get any friction against his extremely hard and painful erection, you knew you weren’t the only one losing your sanity.

“Let go for me baby.” Those five words did wonders for the burning sensation in your chest and soon you were practically seeing stars. Mark literally fucked the shit out of you with just his fingers and mouth alone. Your spine tingled with excitement at the idea of what he was capable of doing to you once he did both of you a favor and penetrated you. He looked up at you with the most adorable smile once he licked you up entirely and you couldn’t help but giggle at how he looked so adorable with your essence all over his face.

“Come here.” You didn’t have to ask him twice; he quickly got up from off the floor and connected your lips together. His kiss was more softer this time and it gave you the chance to really take in the beautiful man hovering on top of you. After years of having an internal battle with yourself; trying to lie to yourself saying you only appreciated him because of his devastatingly good looks and how nice he was towards you and that there was no way you could possibly have any feelings for him whatsoever, you came to the conclusion that you’ve always harbored feelings for the older boy. And that says a lot seeing as how you were sure you loved Jackson with your entire being.

When he began to grind himself against your naked sex, you broke out of your thoughts and released an erotic whimper; one that went straight to Mark’s pants. The rough material of his skinny jeans against your sensitive nub was something you weren’t used to, but it was a pleasurable soreness you couldn’t get enough of.

“Take off your pants. Now.” If this was under different circumstances and he had the normal amount of patience he usually did, then he would’ve laughed at your impatient demeanor. He would’ve also teased you and went against everything you were asking of him just to mess with you. But since this was the first time he got to have his way with you after pursuing you for the last few years, he was just as excited as you were. Breaking away from you for a few seconds, he yanked his shirt off not caring if he were to ruin it or not and pulled his jeans off, leaving him in just his underwear. Your mouth watered at the sight of his dick imprint against his briefs and you took no time in reaching over to palm him over the thin material. Seeing him bite his lip at your touch made your cheeks warm and before you could continue your ministrations, he ripped your hand away and sat you up.

“You’re gonna ride me like the filthy slut you are. Then you’re gonna suck on my cock. Am I clear?” There were so many times you’d find yourself wondering what Mark was like behind closed doors. You got to see him interact with patients every now and then and he was always so sweet; so patient with them. Your personalities were practically mirrored each other’s, which is why you found it hard to believe he had such a dirty mouth on him. Although you hated the idea of men degrading women, you loved hearing him say such erotic and naughty words. You nodded in agreement, closing your legs together at the thought of finally becoming one with Mark.

Sometimes you wondered what life would’ve been like if you were to meet Mark before Jackson. Sure, the last two years with Jackson were some of the best years of your life so far, but you couldn’t stop the tiny voice in your head telling you that Mark was so much better for you. You began to worry at what was going to happen after the two of you finished your love making session. Did he really want you like he claimed he did? Or was he just having sex with you to have sex? You didn’t want to ruin your time together before it could really start and looked up at him while dragging your finger along his well defined body. How was he so ripped for a x-ray technician? When did he have the time to work on his body knowing that he worked 40 hours a week with overtime?

“You’re so hot.” It came out a whisper, but the giggle that fell from his lips made it aware that he heard it and your cheeks grew red in embarrassment. He placed a soft kiss on your nose and placed some of your hair behind your ear so he could get a better look at you.

“Stop being so cute. It makes it hard having all these vulgar and filthy images of what I plan on doing to you right now.” After playfully pinching your butt and a couple of stolen kisses later, he pulled off his underwear and threw it somewhere on the ground. Your breath hitched at the sight. Not only was he long, but he was also very thick and you had to take in a big gulp when you realized how he was going to vehemently stretch out your walls. Noticing your blank face, he couldn’t help but feel like something was wrong and he hated the thought of rushing you. You were his best friend’s girlfriend for God’s sake.

This was all happening too soon. You came out tonight with vengeance on your mind and he knew it was wrong to be an accomplice; to be the one you fooled around with but he didn’t care anymore. He was aware how unethical it was to lose a friendship of over ten years for a girl he’s known for two, but you weren’t just some random girl. You were the love of his life and once the two of you were to call it a night, he was going to try and see if you were willing to take things further in your relationship.

“Everything okay y/n?” You didn’t realize that you must’ve been blanking out and you nodded quickly while flipping the two of you so that he was laying against the seat and you were on top of him.

“You’re just—um—yeah.” He looked at you in curiosity before placing his hands on both of your ass cheeks and kneading them all but gently.

“I’m sorry—I didn’t quite get that y/n. I’m gonna need you to speak up if you plan on sinking on my dick at all tonight. Don’t hide from me baby. I want to see the real you. The you that no one else gets to see. Be loud for me y/n.” A soft sigh fell from your lips before bringing your hand to his face and bringing his cheeks in between your fingers.

“Your cock is huge and I can’t wait to feel it inside of me. Is that what you wanted to hear? Don’t lie, you want me to ride you just as much as I want to so even if I didn’t admit it you—“ The forceful kiss he smashed against your lips got you to stop all together.

“I’ve wanted to fuck you the minute I’ve met you. Well—I mean I wanted to do a lot of things with you. I wanted to kiss you at the most randomest times of the day, I wanted to hold you and to be held by you. I wanted to beat you in halo and have you take out your anger from losing on me in bed. I wanted to take you out on cute little dates and have you meet my family. Everything Jackson got to do, I wanted to do it. I hated seeing the two of you be all lovey dovey knowing that I had feelings for you—have feelings for you. I still can’t believe we’re here right now and I’m just seconds away from burying myself balls deep in that tight cunt of yours. You mean a hell of a lot to me y/n. I’ll take good care of you baby—not just right now. If you’ll give me the chance—I’ll treat you the way you deserve. I’ll give you my all—everything I have. I’ll never give you a reason to question your worth. You’re so fucking perfect y/n and you’re all I could ever want—need in my life.”

You didn’t even realize you were tearing up until he brought his fingers up to your cheek to wipe away a stray tear. He ran his thumb across your bottom lip and you playfully brought it in to your mouth, seductively sucking on it to get a rise out of him. When you first found out that Jackson was cheating on you, you were quick to blame yourself for not being good enough. You began to feel like you weren’t enough for Jackson. Not pretty enough, funny enough, smart enough, sexy enough. You felt worthless and you were afraid that any man would get tired of you and move on to someone more exciting; more thrilling who did more than baking new recipes she saw on the food network and reading romantic novels in her free time.

Mark however, in less than an hour made you feel like you were the most beautiful girl in the entire world. Like you were an ethereal goddess on this hell forsaken earth and he’s always treated you this way. It just took so long for you to finally come to that realization and now that you did, you knew that you wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of your life loving and being loved by Mark.

“Take me Mark. I’m yours.” The growl that came from the back of his throat sent you in a frenzy. For someone who had such an adorable and extremely contagious high pitched laugh, it was hard to believe that he had such a deep and raspy voice. Whenever the two of you had shifts early in the morning, you were lucky enough to hear how hoarse and rough his voice could get and it was extremely attractive. Now that it was being used in such a sensual and lustful atmosphere, you couldn’t be more turned on.

“Wait—y/n, I don’t have a condom. Fuck—“ you gave him a smirk before taking his cock in your hand; you grazed your thumb against his slit and spread the precum around the tip before cupping his length and dragging your hand along his girth. Watching him throw his head back while biting his bottom lip in attempts to keep in his moans and grunts gave you a huge amount of confidence you didn’t think was possible. In most of your love making sessions with Jackson, you let him dominate you every single time. It wasn’t like he gave you much of a choice though; he made it aware that he never submitted to anybody.

Seeing Mark; completely putty in your hands was a sight you’d never get over wanting to see. After giving his cock a few pumps, you lined him up at your entrance; gliding his tip along your folds to collect some of your essence from earlier as lubricant. Neither of you were prepared for the delicious stretch once you finally sank down on him. Your walls were so warm; so tight and so wet and Mark knew he wasn’t going to last long. He could come right then and there if he really wanted to but he didn’t want to seem like a loser who came in less than three minutes no matter how crazy you were driving him.

The two of you moaned in sink and he immediately sat up; not being able to physically stay away from you. He wanted to be as close to you as he possibly could. His chest was warm against yours and the feeling of his heartbeat made you smile against his neck.

“I’m on the pill if you’re okay with that.” He nodded quickly and smashed his lips roughly against yours.

“You feel so fucking good—so fucking tight—I’m gonna need you to do something soon—ride me y/n. Fuck me like you hate me baby—I wanna see those tits bounce for me.” You took his arms off from your waist and shoved him back down to his previous position. As much as you loved the feeling of his arms wrapped protectively around your body, you wanted to watch his facial expressions as you bounced on him. He looked at you with so much lust in his eyes; seeing you so forceful and commanding made his dick twitch. You grabbed tightly at both of his wrists and pinned them above his head before you got off of him and sank back down. His cock was throbbing at this point and you were sure he was probably suffering not being able to do anything about it for the last hour.

Feeling his cock glide perfectly against your tight, velvety walls was mindblowing. He began meeting your thrusts roughly, shoving himself as far as he could go in to your pussy that this position allowed him to. Mark may have been underneath you and readily allowed you to take the lead, but he was a power bottom. He couldn’t help himself; you just felt so good each and every time your ass sank down and clapped against his abdomen. Sure, he already thought you were so beautiful, but having you there with your hair a tangled messed, your otherworldly figure naked and bare, breasts bouncing, sweat building up on your body with your skin glistening and your face reacting to each and every pump of his dick against your core, Mark felt like this was when you were the most beautiful. There was nothing he loved more than hearing his name fall from your lips the rougher he thrusted himself in to you. Skin on skin slapping filled up the car and the windows began to fog.

“M—Mark—fuck me—“ he giggled softly and cupped your cheek with his palm as you continued bouncing on him at a fleeting pace.

“Isn’t that what I’m doing baby? Fuck y/n—you feel so good. I love being buried in this tight cunt of yours. Tell me y/n—whose making you feel so good. Whose cock is stretching you out so well huh? Fucking say it y/n.” You placed one hand on his chest while bringing the other one to wrap around his neck. He gasped at your movements and you could tell it wasn’t something he was used to, but he didn’t do anything to stop it nor did he seem like he wanted you to pull away.

“You Mark—you. And only you. Your cock feels so good—you’re so—ugh—fucking huge—“ right as you were about to continue, a noise interrupted the two of you and you wanted to ignore it, but you knew exactly what—or who it was.

“What is that?” You groaned before looking around for your phone. You had no clue where anything was at this point; your mind was so set on having Mark fuck the living shit out of you so you didn’t care about anything else. “Nothing, ignore it. Keep fucking me.” His hands cupped both of your breasts and playfully flicked both your nipples before continuing to massage them. Unfortunately, your phone went off again and this time, Mark grew curious as to who might have been calling.

“Maybe you should answer it. It must be important if they’re calling a second time.” You looked towards the ground in search of your phone and rolled your eyes at the caller id.

What perfect timing he had. “It’s Jackson.” The frown that rose upon Mark’s face made your heart sink; he didn’t understand why he was so bothered. He was the one with his dick inside of you at the moment, so what did it matter if Jackson was calling? His grimace didn’t last long when an idea immediately popped in to his head.

“Answer it.” You looked at him in disbelief. Did he really think you were going to answer your boyfriend’s phone call while you were currently riding another man? He had to be crazy; but the devilish grin on his face said otherwise. “You heard me y/n. Answer it. Answer him while I fuck you. Let’s see how much of a good girl you really are.” It was risky, and you were afraid your cover was going to be blown as soon as you said hello. But you didn’t care anymore. If Jackson were to find out what you were doing right now and who you were doing right now, then so be it. You were already having such a hard time controlling your moans and stifled cries of pleasure, what more now while talking on the phone with your boyfriend?

“Hey—what’s up?” Mark looked at you with an unreadable look in his eye but deep down you knew it couldn’t be good.

“What am I doing—I—uh—I’m working out—yeah—f—fuck—hmph—sorry, there’s this one squat that’s—so fucking hard—“ he lifted you off of him in one swift motion and flipped the two of you so that you were lying on your stomach and he was hovering over your back. Out of all the positions, doggy style was his favorite. Mark couldn’t count on his hands how many times he pictured you on all fours as he fucked in to you with no mercy. He didn’t even give you any time to prepare before inserting himself back inside of you. Jackson had to be an idiot for not even thinking that you were currently fucking someone else. Your moans were that of pleasure, not pain.

Mark’s pace was relentless; he was practically in jack rabbit mode pulling out and pushing himself inside of you at a pace that was driving you closer to the edge. He found his way in to the crook of your neck and left a few wet kisses there.

“You—you wanna come—over? Right now? Oh, um, I’m actually really tired—FUCK—sorry I just stubbed my toe—I’ll probably take a shower and go tO BED FUCK—“ For some reason, knowing that Jackson was on the other side of the call heightened Mark’s desire to want to hurry up and reach his orgasm. Something about the fact that the two of you were so close to getting caught aroused him even more. You didn’t even have the chance to continue before Mark yanked your phone away and threw it back on the ground. If you weren’t so focused on your release, you would’ve been mad at the lack of care he had for your expensive technology. But you could feel your orgasm building up and it was all you wanted at this point.

“He talks too much—you’re supposed to be focused on me—how do you think he’ll feel knowing that his best friend fucked his girlfriend doggy style? You like this position don’t you y/n? You like how it feels getting your back blown out. Love the feeling of your beautiful ass clapping against my navel? Love being on your knees like the dirty girl you are. I hope you know once we’re done in here, I plan on taking you back to my place and having you again. I’m never gonna get enough of you y/n. I love—I—fuck I love you so much ahhh shit—“ his creamy, warm liquid filled up your body in deep, rushed squirts. You couldn’t put in to words how full you now felt and you didn’t know if it was because he filled you to the hilt with his cum, or because he just confessed that he loved you.

Being the insecure person that you were, you couldn’t stop the tiny voice in your head telling you that he said it in the heat of the moment. There was no way he could love you. He was Mark Tuan; one of the most popular and sought out bachelors in your entire hospital. Every nurse, receptionist and medical assistant had eyes for him and you couldn’t blame them. He was gorgeous and you were sure he could get anyone he wants; especially someone without baggage from a toxic relationship with someone he called his best friend. Mark could do so much better than you.

Although you could tell he was tired, he continued his thrusts inside you while bringing his hand down to your clit and rubbing on it to help bring you to your orgasm. He wanted you to feel the euphoria he was feeling since you milked him dry of everything he had and rode the living hell out of him. Before you knew it, you were soon seeing stars and coming a second time that night in less than an hour. Jackson, and any one of your previous boyfriends could never get you to come even once the entire duration of your hookup. Your heart warmed at the idea of Mark wanting to make sure you were having an equally amazing time as he was.

He was the first man who seemed genuinely interested in making sure that you were taken cared of and as selfish as it sounded, you craved to have another chance to be one with him. Once you both reached your highs, he turned you over and gently placed you down on the seat before plopping himself on top of you. Usually you would complain about how sticky and sweaty your partner was after sex, but something about Mark was different from everyone else. You wanted to be as close to him to be able to feel his heartbeat.

The one that was practically beating against your chest like a snare drum. He leaned back to take a good look at you and stole one kiss from the corner of your mouth while brushing some stray hairs away from your face. “That’s my pretty baby. Such a good girl y/n. I can’t—that was—fuck. You are ethereal. I know I told you to fuck the life out of me but shit—I didn’t think you’d actually do it. I’m gonna need to have you at least three times a day.”

You let out an exhausted giggle while tracing some patterns on his back. No matter how tired you were though, watching him stare at you like you were some marvel, like the person who set the solar system in the sky made you want to show him what the idea of making love to him again did to you. “Mark. I want to suck you off.” The fit of coughs that fell from the back of his throat was unexpected. In his past experiences, Mark never forced a girl to ever do something she didn’t want to do. One of his favorite parts of sex was receiving head, but he only wanted his partner to blow him if she wanted to; not because she felt like she had to. However, hearing you confidently confess that you wanted to give him a blowjob made his heart flutter and he could feel himself getting hard again.

“God y/n, you’re too good for me. I can’t wait to fuck that pretty mouth of yours.” He was quick in pulling himself out of you; the whimper that fell from your lips at the absence of him inside of you made him stifle back a laugh but seeing you sink to your knees was a sight that Mark would’ve never thought he would ever see in his 27 years of existence. You put your hair up in a makeshift ponytail and brought his dick in to the palm of your hand. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t think penises were ugly. Genitals in general were extremely ugly; but something about Mark’s made your cheeks warm and your core throb. Was there nothing wrong with this man at all? It was obvious he was God’s favorite.

You spit on the tip of his cock to lubricate him before you began pumping him from the tip of his cock down to his balls. You brought your thumb against the side of his length and slowly glided it back and forth. Then, after what felt like hours to Mark, you placed a kiss on the tip before wrapping your mouth around it. The feeling of your tongue circling against the head while you ran it in between his slit made him want to pull his hair out. You barely got to do anything and he felt like he was overstimulated. You lowered your hands to both of his balls and began fondling them while completely engulfing his dick with your mouth. You tried to take as much of him in to your mouth as you possibly could.

His tip hit the back of your throat with each and every thrust and you could feel tears building up in your eyes. It hurt; your mouth was already opened as wide as it could possibly go and Mark lost himself in how amazing it felt. Your mouth was warm and tight; just like your cunt and he was enjoying the feeling of your teeth grazing along his veins.

“Fuck y/n—you’re swallowing me so well. Your mouth—fuck your mouth—so warm—so wet. You look so pretty like this; with my cock down your throat. Even prettier with it buried in your soaking pussy. Do you think I could—would it be okay if—I face fuck you? Sorry baby—it’s just too much. Don’t hesitate to tell me if it hurts okay? I just—fuck I can’t wait to feel you choking on me.” He allowed you some time to prepare and to get in to a comfortable position. When you gave Mark the okay, he reached for your ponytail and gave it a light tug.

“Wait Mark—before I start, I want to try something.” The question was on the tip of his tongue, but stopped altogether the minute he felt you bring one of his balls in to your mouth; roughly sucking and grazing it ever so softly with your teeth. You didn’t spend much time on his balls, you wanted nothing more than to feel him fuck your mouth but you wanted to show his body the same amount of love he was showing to yours. After nipping, sucking and fondling both of his balls, you brought your mouth back on to his cock and let him control the pace and tempo of his thrusts. He placed one hand on the back of your head as the other yanked at your ponytail. You could feel your jaw working pretty hard on swallowing him and you could feel saliva falling from the sides of your mouth; but the moans, animalistic grunts, and compliments of how good you were blowing him made the pain worth it.

Not too long after you began sucking on his cock, your phone started to ring again and you had a fear that Jackson put two and two together. At this point, you didn’t give two shits if he were to find out. Matter of a fact, you wanted him to find out. You would even take a picture of Mark’s dick down your throat if you could. Even if Jackson no longer loved you, his ego would surely hurt if he were to find out you slept with his best friend and if you told him that not only was Mark more well endowed, but that he was a much better lover than Jackson could ever be. You were in shock when Mark picked your phone up with his foot and glared at him for doing so, but in even more shock when he answered the phone.

“Hey man—it’s Mark. Y/n can’t talk right now, my cock is shoved deep down her throat and we would like it if you would stop interrupting us I’m trying to bust a nut in her mouth right now. Bye.” Your eyes widened in shock at his words; not only did he confess that you were blowing him, but he said it so nonchalantly. Like getting sucked off by your best friend’s girlfriend was something natural that happened every day. You pulled your mouth from off of him and looked at him in awe but all he did was smirk and give you a noncommittal shrug.

“What? It was gonna come out sooner or later. Don’t act so surprised, you weren’t all that inconspicuous when you were riding this cock while talking to him. Oh you’re exercising all right—clenching your tight pussy on my cock—they call that kegel if I’m not mistaken. Now, be a good girl and take me back in to your mouth.” You playfully rolled your eyes at his command and wrapped your lips back around his cock, taking him as deep in to the back of your mouth as you could. Whatever you couldn’t fit, you wrapped your hand around and began pumping him; the sounds that fell from his lips were so heavenly.

Never in a million years would you have ever thought you’d find yourself on the floor of Mark’s car with his dick down your throat but you weren’t complaining. He continued to thrust roughly inside of your mouth, trying his best not to hurt you too much but you just felt so good. Watching as you hollowed your cheeks as you continued bobbing your head up and down brought him so much pleasure. There was so many things he wanted to do to you and with you. Face fucking that pretty little mouth of yours was always at the top of his list and he still couldn’t believe it was happening. Feeling you choke on him as he continued ramming himself inside of you is what finally got him to break and to your delight, he released his load in your mouth. You milked him of everything he had and made sure to leave one more kiss on his tip before pulling your lips off with a loud pop.

“Damn—Jackson really fucked up didn’t he? Fuck—you can’t be real. You suck dick like your life depends on it. I always knew you were a kinky little shit. You were made to suck my cock y/n. That was incredible—you were—wow. I can’t even tell you how much I loved that. I always knew sex with you would be an experience but I wasn’t prepared for that.”

You let out a soft giggle, but your mind was filled with so many different thoughts. He told you he loved you while he was buried inside of you. Did he really mean it? Or was he having a mental breakdown and wasn’t able to think of what he was saying? But he also mentioned on having you again and that he’s dreamt of having you like this for a while, so that had to mean something right?

“What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours? You’re spacing out y/n.” He reached out for you and brought you on to his lap while running his fingers along your ribcage. Mark knew you long enough to learn the meanings behind your different mannerisms and he could tell something was on your mind. He was going to make it aware that he was telling you the truth earlier. Taking care of you and your happiness was his new main priority. All he ever wanted to do was to be the main reason behind your breathtaking smile and contagious laughter. He wanted to remind you every single day of how you were the most special person in his life. No matter what this was going to do with his friendship with Jackson, he was going to let it happen.

“Mark.” You looked up at him with curiosity in your eyes and nervousness in your chest. “You said you love me and that you wanna take care of me from now on. Did you—um—do you mean it?” You brought your attention to the ground; not quite prepared for his answer. If this was a spur of the moment kind of thing, you were screwed in more ways than one. Not only were you newly single, or at least had every intention on breaking up with Jackson now, but you didn’t want to lose your friendship with Mark. You were mad with yourself for letting your carnal urges take over, but he was allowing it to continue. He could’ve stopped you the minute you began grinding your ass against his crotch, but he made it aware that he wanted you just as much as you wanted him. His lips were warm against the corner of your mouth; he began placing feather light kisses all around your face until reconnecting your lips together.

There were times in your relationship where you no longer got butterflies from kissing Jackson and that’s when you knew there was a chance your relationship was going to go downhill. Kissing Mark however was a completely different story. Your body felt electrified. His kiss ignited a fire in your bones and you couldn’t stop wanting to kiss him.

“I meant every single thing I said y/n. I love you—I’ve been in love with you for longer than I’d like to admit. I um—I don’t know how to say this without sounding like an asshole or a bad friend—I’ve actually been single this entire time because I’ve only ever had eyes for you. Pathetic right? I’ve been pining after my best friend’s girlfriend from the beginning of their relationship. I just—I’ve always thought the world of you. I always admired you; your determination, work ethic, your kindness, generosity, intelligence—you’re the most astounding person I’ve ever met. I knew you were out of Jackson’s league when he first introduced us to you and the more time I spent with you, the more I realized that nobody really deserved you. Not even me. I don’t know how you feel about me, but I can only hope by the mind blowing sex we just relinquished in that you have some kind of feelings for me. Even if this was a brief lapse of judgment on your part, I hope you realize that you deserve so much more than what Jackson can give you. I’m sorry for not telling you of his infidelity earlier, but I wanted him to tell. I can promise you I’m not hiding anything else from you and if you give me the chance, I’d love to be yours y/n.” His confession sent your head spinning and you didn’t think you could form the words to show him how much he meant to you and how excited you were to take things further in your relationship. Seeing that beautiful smile of yours that he loved so much light up your face made him mirror your expression and placed a soft kiss on your nose. “I’m taking that pretty smile of yours as the answer—“

“I love you too. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have any feelings for you. I think I always felt something toward you and only now did I realize that it was love—I knew it was wrong to like you while I was in a relationship so that’s why I tried my best to ignore all the romantic thoughts I’d have of you. I just—I didn’t think I deserved you. You did so many things for me—things that Jackson didn’t even do for me and I couldn’t help but thinking that I was with the wrong person. Just a few months ago, I started wishing it was you whenever I kissed Jackson or whenever we had sex. Every time he held my hand or pulled me in to his embrace, I’d pretend it was you. I always felt this connection with you and sometimes I’d mention inviting you over to Jackson’s every now and then so I had an excuse to see you. You know when I found out he was cheating, I had this crazy idea of getting back at him and this naughty fantasy of fucking you in my bedroom and having him walk in on us would replay over and over in my head. I’d love to be yours Mark. It’s all I ever wanted. Things would’ve been so much better if I met you on my own in the hospital before I met Jackson, but let’s not worry about it. We’re together now, that’s all that matters. But Mark—what about Jackson?” He let out a scoff.

“What about Jackson? Fuck him—wait don’t. I’m going to be the only man you fuck from now on. I lost all respect for him when I found out he was cheating on you. How could anyone in their right minds do such a thing to you? You’re the most flawless being in existence and his dumbass took advantage of you. Now his karma is going to suffer watching me take care of you in the ways he failed to. Maybe we should go and make that fantasy a reality right now? There are so many ways and so many places I plan on taking you in baby. You’re mine y/n and I’m going to make sure everyone in your building knows it once I’m done with you.”

#got7 imagines #got7 smut #mark tuan #mark tuan imagines #mark tuan smut

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sobdasha · 4 years ago

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i’ve been rereading a lot of my favorite stuff for months now

since I'm lacking in spoons for library trips

And when I was cottoning on to the fact that I have, in fact, been autistic all along, one of the things I realized is that the connecting thread between the kinds of stories and kinds of characters that I like is in fact that they display autistic or autistic-adjacent traits. I had realized this, come up with a lot of examples. I knew this.

Haha yeah as I'm actually rereading the things the evidence is damning that I did not come even close to understanding the full depth of it.

~ Taucris Ithesta is Autistic and Other Adjacent Things re: Leckie's Novels ~

Actually let's start with The Raven Tower because you can't actually argue with me about autistic Siat.

Siat actively avoids eye contact, is """shy""", speaks too softly, has an excellent grasp of humor, likes rocks as a special interest, likes to collect rocks, likes to sort rocks, likes to line up rocks, has one (1) bff to conduct social interactions for her, notices patterns, is good at learning, and is considered disabled by society's standards.

Ughhhhh all that talk about rocks makes me sad all over again that I pitched my rock collection when I moved out (I saved the best fossils, though).

(ETA: I have since bought more rocks because polished gemstones with carvings on them make for great stims, I am very pleased with me)

Okay so now that that's been established, let's talk about Strength and Patience of the Hill.

Because this rock gets me. Originally I figured it was probably, y'know, like with Ancillary Justice Leckie's given me an ace-aro main character and I can identify with that as an ace-aro. But unlike Breq, who very much loves people and wants to take care of them and found family etc, Strength and Patience of the Hill doesn't give much of a shit about people. With some exceptions of people that are it's people, how dare you mess with them, Strength and Patience of the Hill will kick your ass. Although even then I'm not sure Strength and Patience is all that great at taking care of people. Also Strength and Patience of the Hill is very much absorbed in its own selfishness, very much consumed with his own internal world, and I am also a jerk like that so it was very relatable.

(Yes I am using multiple pronouns because one of my many favorite parts of the book signing was watching everyone scramble over pronouns for a rock because "It never came up so I never figured it out" and I'm pretty sure Strength and Patience doesn't even use pronouns because why would you need a gendered pronoun to refer to yourself??? You don't even need a name to refer to yourself, actually I'm pretty sure Strength and Patience doesn't actually consider itself to have a name.)

So it made sense that this rock just really gets me. I know it's bad when the majority of representation for ace-aro characters is stereotypical robots or rocks or aliens (oooh or sentient space rocks wait wAIT now that I've said that I've just realized the Myriad is the definition of a Crystal Gem, pffft) or whatever but honestly I don't care because I just really identify with the robots??? So I really liked it, YMMV.

(It's probably also bad if the trend for autistically-coded characters is just stereotypical robots or rocks or aliens or whatever too but like honestly a big autistic #mood is feeling like you are a robot or an alien or whatever so maybe that's why I'm not offended???)

My point being that Strength and Patience of the Hill displays a lot of autistic traits and is therefore very relatable, in this Ted Talk I will.

Strength and Patience of the Hill processes things slowly. She will come up with the perfect retort and tell you 5 years later with absolutely no context.

It loves daydreaming, staring at things, noticing patterns, and enjoying quiet and solitude. It loves thinking about why things are the way they are. Look I have fantasized about what if I could exist as just a pair of eyeballs and a mind floating around in space, observing things, thinking things, and not having to actually interact with the world, and I'm pretty sure this rock is living that life. (Until y'know it gets told life doesn't work like that.)

Despite his slow processing speed, and taking a while to learn language, Strength and Patience of the Hill is good at learning things, and I feel like it's the kind of sort-of-sideways, context-based accumulation of knowledge that I learn through as well.

Strength and Patience of the Hill has one (1) friend, and through the Myriad it benefits from the fact that the Myriad has an actual social circle, without having to put forth any effort of maintaining friends on its own, which is 100% the way to do it.

Strength and Patience of the Hill tends to attract the other "quirky" kids--that is, my impression is that the people who become his priests tend to be those people who look at the world a little differently, those people on the fringes. Trans people, autistic people, people with other disabilities.

Strength and Patience of the Hill trying to explain the state of affairs in Vastai to Eolo: "Okay so my first memory I can recall is…" No, okay, no, I know, it's just literally how the narrative has to be told, I'm not criticizing, but that doesn't make it any less reminiscent of "autistic person trying to explain a simple thing but starts in with 10 pages of context first to ensure the over-explanation makes sense" (haha that's why I consistently got stuck training endless new hires, I'm literally so bad at it that I'm the best in the department and I hate life).

Difficulty understanding other's feelings/points of view/circumstances (I know it's because he's a rock and a god but that doesn't make it any less relatable), hmmm what else…

Oh right, a typical interaction with Strength and Patience of the Hill:

Person: (gives offering) Strength and Patience: (offering is accepted because the transaction literally occurred, no need to respond) Person: "(asks petition)" Strength and Patience: ... Strength and Patience: wait Strength and Patience: what Strength and Patience: wait was I supposed to do something else Strength and Patience: did you ask something of me? Strength and Patience: I don't understand what you asked????? Strength and Patience: it's been an entire year now it's too awkward Strength and Patience: i'm sure it's. Fine. Strength and Patience: It's fine. (rinse and repeat)

Like I said, this rock gets me.

(Haha I was reading through my notes from the book signing and I found "Strength + Patience doesn't give a shit about balance, Strength + Patience is just selfish, which it manifests as apathy, which is why this rock gets me. All of my best interpersonal traits also spring from not giving a fuck and waiting ppl to go away faster lol" and why is that, oh because ~I'm~ ~autistic~ pfffft)

I started this post a while ago and this was as far as I got and I don't remember if I had more??? Time to talk about Taucris probably!!!

(I'm skipping Ancillary Justice etc for now because I do want to make a post about that but like there's just. So much. In those books. It's masking all the way down. So it can be its own post. One day.)

Because I waited so long I forgot what I was going to write so I'll just grab the book and flip through and comment as I see things.

To start off with: Taucris and adulthood. I've seen other people pick up primarily on the gender aspect of it--that Taucris waited until almost 25 to take her adult name because she she never figured out what her gender was (non- uhhhhhh what's the word for binary when it's three and not two? Non-tri-something Taucris in a society with 3 options but all 3 options are gendered? I'll go with that.) What really resonated for me was that Taucris waited until almost 25 to take her adult name because she never felt like an adult. And I get that ~everyone feels that way~ but I feel like it's Different for Taucris in the same way it's Different for me. Anyway I feel like no matter which aspect you choose, it's probably an autistic vibe.

Also Taucris seems to have a bit of a flat affect? She seems very serious (both in body language and in speech), and kind of intense sometimes when she talks, and Ingray notes how Taucris usually doesn't smile (she smiles with Ingray because Ingray makes her comfortable) and has always been """shy""".

Also Taucris...talks strangely? I am not sure exactly how to explain it. It's not written badly or anything, it's...you know how sometimes you suddenly sit back and look at dialogue and go no one speaks like this and it throws you out of the story because you dropped your suspension of disbelief? Taucris kind of gives me that feeling, and only Taucris. Almost like her speech is a little bit stilted? Awkward? She's very serious and matter of fact and says things like "You've always been so kind to me" with a straight face. But it doesn't feel like a """bad writing""" (quotation marks for subjectivity) thing. But I notice it every time I read her dialogue… I think it's just that Taucris is autistic and awkward and that's how she speaks. Also I think she's adorable.

Police work is Taucris' special interest. So much so that that's the entire reason she became an adult, so she could engage in her special interest better. She's ~weird~ for her single-minded interest and her interest in a job below her ~status~ and she doesn't care, she set her heart on this anyway, volunteering and interning so on.

Oh that was something else I was going to talk about--Taucris mentions feeling like she doesn't have her shit together, not like Ingray (who also doesn't feel she has her shit together. Kind of like "no one really feels like an adult). But Taucris seems quite calm and capable in Planetary Security. I don't know if this is just masking, but...I really hope that she does feel that way in her job. That because it's her special interest, that helps balance out the stress of being alive and simultaneously employed full-time. That because she's been volunteering and interning here so long, she's been familiar with the office and it wasn't a stressful transition. That she acts confident because she feels competent and respected. Taucris may look calm and cool and collected on the outside and be screaming on the inside but I hope she actually feels pretty good on the inside too.

I would also like to say that I like Taucris' nother. Despite what Danach implies, I get the picture from Taucris that e is supportive of Taucris' personality and interests even when e doesn't get it. E indulged her interest in police work, e didn't understand why Taucris wasn't taking an adult name but tried to be patient about it...so I assume that also means that e was understanding of all of Taucris quirks and stims and particularities. E's been a good support system while Taucris' peers have not.

(Except for Ingray, Taucris' one (1) friend.)

I like Taucris' relationship with Deputy Chief Veret too--the way Taucris quietly manages breakfast so e doesn't have to think about it or be put out (this is The Love Language to me, not being inconvenienced, and I feel that this is part of my personality because my personality is autistic, so). I don't know why specifically Taucris does this, but all the reasons I could come up with feel very wholesome. Taucris respects Veret as her boss and as a person. Taucris is empathetic and thoughtful (she doesn't like Danach but she tries to consider and understand where he's coming from; Taucris isn't Hatli but she considers Veret's fasting etc to be valid rather than a choice of superstition). Taucris' situation is different but she knows that it doesn't feel good to be treated as weird, to be sneered at because you don't act the way people expect you to. Taucris, being autistic, maybe has a lot of experience with "perfectly good foods" she won't eat. Taucris strikes me as someone who observes quietly, and considers carefully, and maybe takes a long time to make up her mind but when she moves it's deliberately and not carelessly. Which is, to me, a masking trait.

In the quantum version of this post I was going to write everything so polished and lay out my points so nicely but clearly that didn't happen and I don't know where to end this and I'm sure I didn't even explain things that well so I'll just say, I feel it was very autistic of Taucris in the last chapter to just be like "well IDK what you want from me and rather than expending massive effort trying to suss it out and guessing wrong I'll just be direct: I know you can't talk about what happened so I won't ask you about what happened unless you want me to ask you about what happened in which case you should say so and I will ask but I think maybe you just need to watch a movie with me instead."

#sobdasha fic adjacent #al provenance #the raven tower #HAPPY AUTISM MONTH #look i actually did a thing while it was still april #all my faves are autistic #also is this not showing up in the tags as punishment for my sins or like can I not see it because dumblr

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popculturebuffet · 4 years ago

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New X-Men Xtrospective Part 2: Germ Free Generation (Annual, #117-120)

Hello all you happy mutants! And welcome back to my look one of my faviorite runs of one of my faviorite super teams by one of my faviorite comic book writers!

For those of you just joining us.. it’s been a while. I did the first instalment of this retrospective back in early January as a present to my friend for christmas, as he had never read E is for Extinctoin and what with this run being vital to the current, utterly brilliant Krakoa era of X-Men. But with both Black History Month and Valentine’s day, February had no real room for this one and march ended up being just as crammed with me doing essentially the entire della arc of ducktales in one month. I didn’t mean for this retrospective to get pushed so far back, but since I gave up doing weekly coverage of Final Space I had some room on the schedule so this retrospective is back with a vengance with two entries this month and hopefully at least one a month afterword to keep it at a decent clip.

Last time I covered the background of this run and didn’t really find much for the issues after, so I won’t have to spend as much time on background.

So since i’ts been a few months, a refresher is probably in order

PREVIOUSLY, ON X-MEN: Our merry mutants enterted a marvelous new era. As Charles redidciated to the dream with new equipment and a new uniforms our hero encounter a new villian: The Mysterious Cassandra Nova, a powerful telepath who used an uwitting patsy from the trask family and a defucnt sentinel factory to slaughter the mutant nation of Genosha, killing 16 million mutants in the most horrific act of genocide against mutants ever known. And the fact there has been more than one genocide against mutant kind MIGHT, just MIGHT be the reason they blackmailed for peace with life saving drugs instead of helping willingly and freely in the current comics. Just maybe.

Cassandra was captured by the X-Men soon after but escaped and nearly got a hold of Cerebra only to be stopped thanks to a combination of former enemy, genoshan resident at the time of the genocide, and that bitch Emma Frost who snapped her neck and Charles himself who uncharacteristically shot Cassandra in the head. That night Charles took a bold step over that would change the X-Men forever and told the world on live tv:

While all of this was going on we got caught up on the team’s personal struggles, currently consisting of Cyclops, Jean Grey, Beast and Wolverine with Emma joining as of the issue we’re about to cover. Beast is grappling with a secondary mutation that makes him look like Aslan, the jesus of narnia and all lions. Meanwhile Scott and Jean are grappling with their non existant sex life as Cyclops possesion by Apocalypse shortly before this story has severely rattled him and caused him to close himself off emotionally.

So that’s where we pick up. Our heroes are now no longer hiden saftely in the shadows from a world that hates and fear them but are out front and center with the world watching. And we’ll see both how that helps their cause and how it puts them directly in the cross hairs under the cut. Content Warning: This review discusses Transphobia and a scene involving a school shooting. If either of these are a trigger for you or something you do not want to read about please skip this part of the retrospective for your own well being. Thank you and have a lovely day.

The Man From Room X:

We have three stories today: an annual that introduces our final team member and the main villians of our next arc, a one off that moves the main plot for the first 12 issues along, and a three part arc about said villains. Before we get into the Annual, I have to talk about it’s weird gimmick: The issue is entirely sideways. I don’t mean it’s bad though some parts are problematic I mean when bought it’d be on it’s side and in my trade I have to flip the whole thing over on it’s side to read it. It’s just a .. weird choice. Not the weirdest thing about this issue somehow but not unexpected from Grant as they like to play with the formula.

We open in said Room X, a location in China where a mutant named Xorn is kept and showed off to a mysterious group of dickweeds in suits representing “Mr. Sublime”. His jailer, General Aao Jun,, shows him off as most bad guys would : By undoing his helmet and thus disntegrating two innocent children just by looking at them. Sublime says they have a deal.

Meanwhile also in China the X-Men are there for a funeral and Emma and Scott trade insulting questions back in forth: She mocks him about his lack of sex with Jean lately and he brings up her criminal past. As for why Emma’s still with the x-men.. it’s out of pragmatisim. WIth Genosha gone, the x-men are the saftest faction to throw in with.

As for why the X-Men are in China, Charles has rapidly expanded his operations now he’s public by setting up X-Corps, a multinational humantarian aid organization dedicated to helping mutants in need wherever they sprout up. He’s set up offices in Hong Kong, Amsterdam, Mumbai and Melborne.

He’s also half assed it, at least for the Hong Kong office and only gave them two employees: Domino, who those of you not as familiar with the comics may remember from deadpool and Risque.. who I honestly had never heard of before New X-Men and frequently forget existed. I just looked her up for the first time and she’s a minor mutant who was an associate of X-Force and Warpath’s love intrest. She could compress matter causing it to implode. My assumption here is that Morrison simply picked a minor mutant at random for the job.

But yeah naturally with only two mutants charged with, according to domino “All of asia” went horribly and the x-men are there for Risque’s funeral and to find out what happened. Unsuprisingly it’s tied into our cold open: Risque had found evidence of a mutant trafficking operation and died fighting them off and Dom is naturally f eeling in over her head since said operation involves the chinese goverment, who according to her exccute most mutants at birth and John Sublime and his cult.

We soon see a press confrence from this asshole and find out what his deal is: Sublime is the head of the U-Men, a group that belivies they are a “third species” of mutants trapped in human bodies that deserve to have the surgery to make them into mutants, and thus wear weird suits until the world is pure and allows them to have surgery for it.

Yeahhhh this.. this is really fucking uncomfortable and is going to be present throughout today’s piece so let’s just go ahead and rip that band-aid off: The U-Men come off as HIGHLY transphobic. They use terms similar to trans people call themselves trans species and are trapped inside a body they don’t belong in. It’s VERY uncomfortable to read as a result and something that hadn’t really sunk into till thsi reading but once it had.. oh god does this not age well.

The one thing that keeps this from runing the run and Grant Morrison as a whole for me.. is that I do not think for one second it was intentional. Grant themself is genderqueer, nonbinary and a cross dresser. None of this means they CAN’T be prejudice, being Queer does not magically make you immune to being prejudiced. But before this Grant had the genderqueer sentient street Danny the Street over in doom patrol and a trans main character in his book the invisibles, Lord Fanny. And given New X-Men’s biggest flaw as a whole is clumsy early 2000′s unforutnate implications such as a good chunk of the things about Cyclops affair with Emma, we’ll get to that at the right time, Angel in the next arc and Dust, who was introduced as from afganastan wearing an outfit not seen in the country and speaking a language not spoken in the country. Grant didn’t make these mistakes TWICE, it’s why I still have respect for them, and this won’t be the first or last comic i’ve forgiven for being stupid for it’s time. But I will still call Grant out when I see it. Just because I respect an author just because they changed my life does not mean I won’t call them out when they fuck up. And if they prove to be truly vile, have harmed someone or what have you I will cut them the fuck out of my life. I’ve done it with JK Rowling, Warren Ellis, Brad Jones and Joss Whedon. I would do it with Grant if I truly belivied they were transphobic and instead didn’t just write something very stupid without thinking the metaphor through 20 years ago.

So anyway back to the comic book bollocks as Wolvie and Dominio prepare for an infiltration and flirt a bunch. We also find out Jun is a mutant himself with a power only Grant could dream up: his skin, hair and what have you that falls off him turns into a naked golem for a bit before expiring. And if you hadn’t read this issue before reading this review, yes that actually happened. While the first arc had a BIT of Grant’s trademark batshit insanity, the series REALLY starts to pick it up from here: This issue has a mutant with functioning star for a head, a poorly thought out bucnh of sci fi new age organ theives, and a general whose power is “makes naked clones out of his dandruff”. Oh and his fondest wish?

I just... I don’t know how to respond to that. I don’t know how you respond to an old man’s weird murder fetish that he tells a somehow even creepier cult leader while said cult leader is paying him to buy a star man, and their both surronded by the creepy old guy’s skin golems that weirdly look like mudokons. Look i’ve read Grant’s entire utterly bonkers run on doom patrol. I’ve seen a man who looks like a question mark use a bicycle that makes everyone high like their on LSD for president. And THIS is what breaks me.

So while.. THIS is going on, Dom and Wolverine plan to do it all night long on the professor’s credit card, no really he gives all his professors carte blanch to use school fun, and inflitrate, Dom through the elvator this horrorshow just took place in and Wolvie james bond style. Also I gotta say I REALLY love how Morrison writes Domino. She’s wittiy, entertaining and her power is as awesome as always, super luck if you didn’t know. It’s a real shame he didn’t add her to the team: She wasn’t on any other x-teams, with X-Force having been rebranded into X-Statix by this point. She would’ve been a fun addition to the cast.

Naturally wolverine is found out.. but that was the entire plan, for him to serve as a distraction then cut his way to domino while she steals something from the vault. As for the rest of the X-Men, Cyclops, Beast and Emma are all downstairs in the parking garage and find a secret entrance. Jean is not on this trip and that’s a major plot point for this run. This is where Risque died.. and it only get’s worse when Hank goes inside, finding a bug like child, basically htink a giant caterpillar but with tons of human arms inttead of legs with her wings cut off.

Thankfully as Logan and Dom escape above, the U-Men are dumb enough to storm down bellow.. and while they incapacitate beast with some launched tiny knives, designed to incapcicate but leave them in tact for harvest, Emma beats the shit out of them and get the info out as only she can....

Granted she could’ve just turned back to normal and used her telepathy.. but what fun would that be? Plus they have blockers and you know CUT UP A FUCKING CHILD. SO yeah fuck them, let emma have her fun.

Thanks to her they find out the U-Men are a front for illegal organ harvest, and while they can’t prove sublimes attached Emma suggests killing him. Good idea but Scott suggests the lighter approach and we find out what Dom stole, a key, something Emma can psychcially scan. She warns it might take her a bit to get something.. only to be flooded instantly and we find out who the man in the box was. Shen Xorn... i’ll let emma tell you more herself.

It’s stuff like this why, despite some serious flaws like the U-Men debacle and some stuff to come, some I mentioned above other that’s just with the plot that i love this run. Morrison just gets how to really tell an x-men story and the real tragedy of being a mutant. That just for being diffrent, you get shut out, or in this case thrown into a box when you could’ve and should’ve been something more. As emma turns herself to diamond to deal with the psychic backlash, Beast has some solemn words to share.

That night Scott rests in his bedroom while presumibly hearing some truly horrific and sexy things next door while talking to jean before clocking out.. only for Emma to head in in a sexy dress with champagne. What happened? Well we won’t know for sure for most of the run.

The next day the U-Men prepare to load and we get some scrap of what the idea was supposed to be: John talks to Ao Jun about his procedures. We see wings crudely sewen to his back and his throat implaants hurting “But one day I will fly”. THe IDEA is their supposed to be lunatics, people who envy mutantkind but don’t actually respect their culture or their sense of personhood. It’s not the worst idea and had Grant not used trans termnology for htis, it would’ve been a great one. I think he INTENDED for them to be coopting the idea of being trans and what not to maks their true intentions.. which is problematic due to debates like the ones on bathrooms where a lot of transphobic asshats make the bad faith argument a bunch of people are going to pretend to be trans to assault people.

We’re.. we;’re not even to the main storyarc yet.

But things soon go wrong as Xorn’s starhead starts to collapse into a black hole, with no solution as the x-men took the key to his helmet.. and assault the compound. Turns out the star collapse thing is Jun’s revenge on humanity for lockig him down here and he gets his neck snapped. Scott has a solution though.. and it’s stuff like this why I fucking love Scott Summers and get annoyed when people call him “boring”: He realizes Xorn is comitting sucicide.. so he’s going to talk him out of it. Not just for everyone else but he deserves to live. And while Emma points out only logan among htem knows chinese and she can’t get through to Xorns’ head due to the way his brain works, Scott has a simple workaround: Use the nearest chineses speaker to teach Scott chinese. So.. with that he talks to Xorn.

And that my friend is Scott Summers. A man who faced with powerful man whose given up, whose lost all hope... convinces him he can still go on. That living’s better than dying.. and that it does get better. The issue closes with Xorn basking in the sunlight for the first time in decades while Domino sweats having an extremley powerful unknown mutant out in the world. Scott’s already thought of that.. and signed him up with the x-men. Granted it won’t be until our next article that he actually fully joins the team, but w’ell get to that next time.

This issue is great... while the U-Men stuff is pretty bad and isn’t going to get better, the tale of xorn is excitiong, Aao Jun is an intresting antagonist and the sideways gimmick suprisingly works. So now we’ve finshed our apitizer let’s get on to the main course.

Danger Rooms:

We open in well.. the Danger Room with Beast training a new student.

This is Beak. Beak is my faviorite character Morrison came up with and one of my faviorite X-Characters. Beak is a bird like boy who can fly, it’s just a struggle and due to looking diffrent and not having the most impressive power has very low self esteem. It’s also part of something Morrison took a concerted effort to do: introduce more mutants with genuinely odd apperances and drawbacks. Like we saw with Ugly John last time and Aao Jun in the previous issue, Morriosn really likes adding weird mutants but he also uses it to give a genuine downside to being one. While this isn’t NEW to x-men, Morriosn upped the scale and number of characters like this with weird powers and apperances. We see a bunch of human passing ones too but the backgrounds just jammed with all sorts of unique designs and students. It’s also the point where the school became far more crowded like the movies, a good call on my part both to help those coming in from the movies, and to help sell the mutant baby boom going on. After all it wouldn’t make sense if the school was just about 5-7 students and a bunch of grown adults doing superhero stuff like usual would it.

But we get to see that Hank is a good teacher, as he reminds the boy that he’s getting better and won’t be an x-man overnight, and worries about him to the professor, wanting the boy not to slip through the cracks, figuratively, and not to feel like an outcast.. especaily here. But Hank dosen’t feel blue for long, metaphorically he was blue long before he became the lion minus the witch and the wardrobe, as he has a date to night.. and so does Charles.

Or rather he did.. his girlfriend trish, a long time love intrest of his and a reporter.. breaks up with him. Over voice mail. While in washington. And the reasons she gives are not great

Yes Hank’s transformation is radical.. but not only was it not his choice... she’s being a coward, sending the message it’s okay to dump someone because hteir a mutant or because they happen tobe diffrent and that efffects your career. Again it’s moments like this that make the run soar over the more awkward bits.

Meanwhile Logan’s off doing logan stuff, i.e. gazing at a deer. Wow. Jean followed him. Both notice a space ship: Despite recently outing himself as a mutant, leading to an increased number of students and a bunch of rioting morons at the gates, Charles has decided NOW’S a good time to take a vacation to the Shiar empire. As for why Jean’s really out here, her marriage to Scott isn’t doing so good and while Logan encourages her to stay it’s just not that simple: Her telekenisis is coming back, stronger than ever. She feels the most alive she’s been while he’s shutting her out and feeling his deadest. She tries to turn to logan for comfort but he shuts her down. Just wait two decades jean... he’ll open up to a threesome. In all seriousness though having Jean try and come onto Logan .. will backfire slightly on later storylines. But we’ll get to that eventually.

In the basement Hank is studying Cassandra or rather a virtual version of her since her body is naturally in storage. And he’s found out something disturbing: She’s Charles Genetic Twin.. oh and it gets way worse. The Professor’s weird behavior? Barely staffing the hong kong office, leaving suddenly with rioters t the gates, outing himself? About that...

Cassandra tourtures Hank with the possiblity he’s devovling and then tries to mind controlli him into cleaning himself with his diploma when Beak enters. The good news is this allows hank to shake off her control and tackle her, showing off why hank mccoy is fucking awesome in the process.

That is the Hank McCoy I know, love.. and miss dearly. The one we’ll probably never get back sadly after what others did and what Percy’s had to do to reconclie with all they did.

Unfortunately beak being around means cassandra can force him to beat beast into a coma with his bat. She plans to tear Charles dream down around him and make him watch.. and cryptically says he tried to kill her. She then cheerfully leaves Jean in charge.. and talks about just how much damage one could do with an entire interstellar empire in the wrong hands....

This issue is also excellent and sets up the next two arcs nicely while giving us a nice peak in hank’s head. Great stuff. The artist also hid the word sex in a lot of the images see if you can find them.

Germ Free Generation Issue 1:

So now we get into our main story for today. This story and the one before it were drawn by Ethan Van Sciver whose a talented artist.. but also highly contrversial for being a conservative. I myself.. don’t know what he’s said or did, though calling himself “Canceld Superstar’ on twitter really isn’t a good sign. So I really can’t comment on it but I also know someone would mention it if I didn’t bring it up and if you know what he did please enlighten me.

So we open with a school shooter who also scooped out a guys eyes and is part of the U-Men. He get shot by the swat team while making his speech> it’s an effective opening but one that’s become more uncomfortable to read with each passing day due to school shootings going up and up in number. And mass shootings in general and I... I need a second. I need something to relax me

Thank you Stoopy. Your doing Odd’s Work.

So the news reports on this and we soon see how Jean watches the news.. by using Cerebra to read the minds of every person on the planet. Neat. Everyone’s talking about them. We also get a hint for later as we hear on the suicide of one martha johanson who wrote the note in her own blood. She’ll be important later.... and I mean that both in the context of this retrospective and for the fact she’ll go on to be part of x-men in perpetuity.

This is also where another great concept of Morrison’s pops up: Mutant culture. After all mutants are a minority, they should have their own culture. It’s something Hickman’s era has taken and ran with, but it’s a damn good idea and one that it shoudln’t of taken almost 20 years for someone else to use given Decimation was undone way back around 2012 in Avengers Vs X-Men, aka that event half hte articles on the mcu around the fox sale used as either their image for the article or asked about happneing. And yes that is a pet peeve of mine: while I do think like Civil War AVX could use a movie version to make it better, I don’t think it’s an event that could be done right away and would have to be almost entirely redone anyway given the context for AvX is entirely couched in decimation i.e. something NO ONE wants in any x-adaptation.

So it turns out while watching the news in a next level way Jean is also talking to Logan. “Stay out of my personal fantasies”. Yeah I .. I don’t think your ready for a hairy canadian dry humping a transformer.. specifically killbison. And yes.. that is an actual transformer and why yes, I have been waiting to bring him up.

And he is , and I am not making any of this up, part of a group of decpticons known as the breastforce. Your life is better for knowing that and you are welcome.

Anyway as you’d imagine a genocidal old woman in her brothers’ body leaving the X-Men to fend for themselves after having a teenager bludgeon one into a coma after publicly outing them with a rabid bunch of bigoted morons at the gates has not gone great. Henry is still out and despite the short staffing Jean needs logan to stay where he is as he’s close to an emerging mutant and within range to go get her.

Emma of course has never been so fucking irate in her whole life and is plotting various forms of psychic tourture with the help of her proteges the Stepford Cucokoo, 5 teenage mutants who functoin best as a unit and are easily some of MOrrison’s most prominent additions to the x-cast. Unlike a lot of the x-kids, they’ve been featured prominently in every era of x-men after this including the current one.

Jean decides for a less “Make them hate us even more” approach, but no less pissed off, opening the gates and going out directly to chew out the assembled bigoted morons, pointing out the ones carrying “Mutants Go Home!” signs are especailly dumb as this IS her home. And while she dosen’t point this part out, it’ the same for all of them: most of the mutants are either adults who choose to live here, teenagers who along with their parents choose to live here, or in the majority teens who have no where else to go due to either being abandoned by their families or it being way to dangerous for said families for them to stay due to bigoted assholes like the ones holding mutants go home signs.

A member of the press asks if she’s willing to talk to the media and she refutes most of his bullshit allegations: He asks if their building an army, she and Scott respond they are not and are simply educating mutants and protecting them. When he counters with the fact their living weapons and wearing uniforms... she counters with the fact she’s wearing them to protect herself, rightfully, from people like her, and the x-men are an aid orginzation going where needed to protect the world and while asshole points out no one apointed them.. jean shuts him down by pointing out there are no mutants in goverment and a genocide just happened, so someone has to do the job. Another random asshole tries to pipe up with “Genosha declared war on us” and Emma senses this is just going to go round and round and round and simply presses the assembled mob’s “bliss buttons” in their brains to knock them out. Non violent but honestly warranted: A dangerous part of bigoted assholes is they’l bring up racist bullshit to try and couch it like an actual conversation. None of these complaints really hold water if you looked at the x-men’s history for more than 5 minutes. Yes Charles is training them to fight and yes hte ingial class was an army but every class since has only been trained for self defense: they still got into adventures and what not, but it was usually by their own choice or because they were thrust into them by circumstance. Xaviers is exactly what jean said and endudgling these morons, while good on paper, only makes them seem legit.

Jean retreats to the infirmary where she’s on the verge of breaking down from the sheer weight of everything. Cyclops proves that despite not being the best husband right now... he still loves his wife, offering to go look into Sublime with Emma and hoping Hank wakes up. Turns out his mind for now is a big blank room.

So she can’t get any info off his skull, and neither of the two think what happened with Beak adds up. Something is up here. Their also coming down with colds which will be important later. And just as important.. Magneto is becoming a symbol among people and merch sales with his image are on the rise. We then get this.

So Jean is trying to be a supportive, honest wife, and while the questions incredibly insulting.. his answer is equally so. Spoilers, as mentioned we do get an answer long after this.. and they did not. So Jean is wrong to be suspcious, at this point, but is at least trying to be polite about it and gave him the benifit of the doubt.. and Scott basically said he slept with her without actually saying it despite not having to. You could’ve said “no we did not have sex, we simply talked all night”. It’s not ENTIRELY better given the horrible state of their relationship right now, but it’s still better than HEAVILY implying he rocked her body to the break of dawn for no damn reason.

So we meet our next major addition to the cast Angel Salvador, an abused teen who is a mutant.. and whose abusive and molesting step dad beats her and throws her out over this. The scene’s a bit overdone, coming off like an after school special.. but it’s what happens AFTER that’s truly heartwrenching.

A poor scared teenager clutching herself, finding herself homeless alone and desperatly wishing she wasn’t what she was. It’s just a striking image and shows how well Grant uses the mutant metaphor. I could easily see myself in that position had my parents not been good peopl and had I come out far sooner as bi. The idea of desperatly hoping your not what you are simply becaus eof what hell it brings, despite all the joy it can bring too. . it’s heartbreaking to hear.

Naturally though things don’t get much better as the next morning the U-Men have found her, calling her a freak and successfully kidnapping her.. if only because while she uses acid spit to escape, she flies into a power line.

We then get Sublimes meeting with Emma and Scott and a BETTER use of teh u-men as while Grant made the horrible mistake of calling them “transpecies”, seriously what the fuck were you thinking, the way sublime frames it here is a MUCH better, much less accidently bigoted concept.

The idea isn’t bad: A group of humans jealous of the mutants powers, blatantly ignoring the horrible downsides and mountain of persecution that comes with being one. Grant just made the mistake of couching in in Trans metaphors, clearly trying to have the U-Men steal from Trans People too as a way to make themselves seem legit. And I say if you want superpowers.. fine.. wanting to be a superhero or a mutant is fine, the issue with the U-Men is their copoting a culture, trying to be part of mutantkind without having any of the drawbacks and by actively butchering them. It’s why the concept HAS shown up elsewhere; it’s not TERRIBLE, Grant just made a bad creative choice that’s only gotten worse as Transphobia has ramped up further and further.

Sublime denies it when our heroes bring up Hong Kong.. but naturally he’s simply just keeping them talking long enough to bring out his trump cards, an army of u-men and a brain in a jar he uses to incapacitate them.. and announces his plan to use the school as an organ farm for his third species.

Meanwhile Logan finds the U-Men in their truck preparing to rip angel apart.. and given he snikit’s soon after.. i’ts very clear whose REALLY about to get ripped apart.

Germ Free Generation Part 2:

Part two begins wth Sublime monologoging about how Mutantkind are just cattle to them and reveals the brain is martha’s, her sucicide having been faked and her brain currently being controlled to use as a weapon.

So while Johnny monlogues we find out what happened with Wolverine last issue he didn’t cut up the guys yet as they fired their little flichete guns at him... it was about as useful and effective as you’d expect and the massacre you were expecting occurs. Though in a nice bit of reality the fact wolverine’s soaked in blood and just killed a bunch of blood shockingly does not make the already frighttend teen feel he’s safe and she spits acid on him. Logan pours some stuff on the acid, figuring rightly a black ops murder farmacy would have something to counteract it and tells her she’s safe now .. and tells the guy behind him not to try it. He’s stupid and does anyway and likely gets a claw to the head off panel.

They go to a diner to eat and find a local asshole who threatens them with a shot gun to leave once angel uses her power to digest and goes on a rant about how he snapped his own son’s neck to prevent him being born a freak. Just.. fucking hell this arc is not good for my depression. We get some more angst from Angel and whiel her dialouge is not the best, i’ts a too bit mark millar flavored edgelordy for my taste and if I wanted that i’d go read Ultimates or Ultimate X-Me, her pain is real and Logan helps her through it.

Back at the Mansion the U-Men are on their way to strike, whlie Jean unaware continues to buckle under the weight of all the shit she’s had to deal with, feeling SOMETHING is making them weak with the colds and something worse is going on and thus tries going to Beak’s mind instead and gently helps talk him through it, showing her grace and empathy.. and in return finding out Charles was the one responsible. The alarms flair up and Jean tries calling the police now that’s an option.. but it goes exactly how you’d expect.

Also a second artist took over for this issue and the next Igor Kordey. He’s fine, but not nearly as good as Quitely or Van Sciver and it shows. Meanwhile Beast awakens and heads for the body drawer with Cassandra’s body, and professor’s mind in it.

However Jean’s finally had enough and got her second wind. She’s outgunned, outmanned and left to her own devices. And she’s fucking fed up with it. She steels herself and assembles the students. This is obviously a last resort.. but some of them can defend themselves and their going to need to. But today they won’t be learning.. they’ll be teaching and as the U-Men call them defensless Jeans simply asks “Are you sure about that?”

Germ Free Generation Part 3:

So we come to the finale of this arc. Angel is once again an ungreatful brat to logan and he opts to just leave her there if sh’es going to be like that pointing out being a mutant sucks, it’s going to keep sucking.. and she needs to deal with it instead of lashing out at him and herself over it.

We get back to the U-Men, one of whom is utterly flabergasted they want to him to cut of Cyclops head... only for Emma to awaken.. and take back her regular form meaning she has her telepathy back. The only reason they were able to get her ealier is she was in diamond mode which is stronger but lacks that, a nice way to check and ballance her new powers. She quickly takes them out and disables Martha.

Back at the school we get one of Jean’s definting moments for me and a true chance to show how badass she can be. Before this while Morrison wrote her well, and his version’s still my favoirite, she didn’t really get to do much and was motly in the background. This arc has been her time in the limelight, having trouble grappling with all the stress of running this place by herself.. and emerging from it stronger, more capable and ready to kick some racist weirdo ass. She tries a few diffrent tactics first, having a mutant with a voice power project it to make them think their san invisible army and having the cuckoos fuck with their heads but when both fail, Jean REALLY gets to show off. Thier blade ammo gets turned into a cool looking 3 dimensioinal shape with her telekneisis, and in a cool moment and a wise use of something gross makes the only one of them with useable powers throw up, before issuing a badass boast, wreathed in flames all while she crumples their guns into uselessness. and tears open their suits.

Bad ass.. and logan and Angel arrive just in time for the cecendo as hte u-men flee in terror

The Phoenix has been Reborn. Jean Grey has risen from the ashes and returned to full power.

Meanwhile Sublime is pankcing.. and it gets worse when Emma shows up, fully enraged after all of this and has some words for him.

Iconic. Emma prepares to drop him out of a building but Scott rightly tries to get her to back off, pointing out the pr nightmare it’d create and the fact that they have enough evidence ot shut him down. Martha however has other ideas and gets him to let go of his own accord, falling to his death.. but given he’d aranged a stunt for the press apparently this gives our heroes deniability and Martha her revenge.

So we end this three parter as Jean revels in her new power, and Beast returns with an announcment:

Final Thoughts for Germ Free Generation: This arc is pretty good if forgetable. The struggle of Jean to run the school herself and her rising from the ashes of her own pain at the end with the power of the phoenix at the end is fantastic, finally both giving her a chance to shine.. and a worrying sign for her friends given what her phoenix force copy whose memories she has a copy of, long story, did is awesome. The other parts are okay and ehhhhhhhhh though. Scott and Emma’s investigation into the u-men while having a really good climax, is pretty standard x-men stuff, and Wolverin’es trek with angel is just okay with Angel being highly intolerable during this arc, with Morrison trying a bit TOO hard to make her a “realistic” teen instead coming off as horribly unplesant. She’s supposed to just be lashing out but comes off obnxious as a result. That said this arc does furhter a lot of Morrisons best idea and introduce more, and is a great setup for our next arc, which we’ll get to in two weeks. Soooo

Next Time On X-Men: We find out just what the hell Cassandra Nova is, what her plans are, and what happened with her and charles as our heroes come down with a cold as the might of the shiar empire bears down on them. It’s IMperial in two weeks.

Next Time ON This BLog: Speaking of long Delayed Projects, I finally return to The Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck as a young Scrooge starts his prospecting career, learning the ins and outs from a rich new mentor, and finding the price tag striking it rich comes with. Raid a copper hill with me tommorow.

If you liked this review, subscirbe for more, join my patreon, and if there’s a comic you’d like me to cover suggest it in the comments or outright comission a review from me via ask. See you at the next rainbow

#new x-men #grant morrison #cassandra nova #shen xorn #beast #hank mccoy #jean grey #cyclops #scott summers #wolverine #logan howlett #angel salvadore #beak #barnell bohsk #the stepford cuckoos #the u-men #john sublime #marthan johanson #ethan van sciver

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janiedean · 4 years ago

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now I'm curious what Heidegger did if you're open to elaborating :P

I am always open to rant on heidegger *rubs hands* THEREFORE I SHALL NOW GO ABOUT IT:

now, problem #1: heidegger is SADLY seen as like THE BIGGEST GENIUS GAMECHANGER OF THE 20TH CENTURY, THE BEST, HE CHANGED EVERYYYTHIIING blah blah blah, to which I say: BULLSHIT

and now we go on to the fact that THE FUCKER DIDN’T EVEN FUCKING KNOW WHAT HE WAS SAYING BUT WROTE EVERYTHING IN SUCH A WAY THAT IT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE TO UNDERSTAND IT IF YOU DIDN’T BREAK YOUR HEAD OVER IT *and* on top of that his mantra was saying that you weren’t a true philosopher if people could understand what you were saying’, which means that since everyone things he’s a genius WHAT HAPPENED SINCE THEN WAS THAT EVERYONE STARTED WRITING STUFF PUTTING IT IN A WAY THAT THE AVERAGE PERSON WOULDN’T UNDERSTAND and I hate it because that’s how the category got the fame of ‘ah those people thinking about thin air and expressing themselves without making people understand’ WHICH IS NOT TRUE THAT’S NOT WHAT PHILOSOPHY IS ABOUT

when I say the fucker had no clue, I mean that literally he wrote this essay in the thirties then twenty years later he writes a letter to someone else about it and says ‘I RE-READ IT AND I THOUGHT I PUT A BIT TOO MUCH MEAT ON THE FIRE’ translation for I DIDN’T UNDERSTAND WHAT THE FUCK I WAS WRITING

which also adds up with the fact that the moment you actually understand something and dig in deeper in his bullshit you find out IT ACTUALLY MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE/DOESN’T HOLD UP AND I HATE IT

I shall now give you TWO examples of that before I move on to the stuff that also made him a literal piece of shit under all senses

now, the essay above was a complete fucking lsd trip about how you could understand the essence of the world THROUGH ART which was a complete mess but like at some point he goes around ranting about this van gogh painting with two farmer’s shoes. heidegger is all there like SO SINCE THESE SHOES BELONG TO THE FARMER/HIS LANDLADY WHO ALSO WAS A *FARMER* YOU CAN SEE THE DIRECT LINE TO THE EARTH and a whole load of other bullshit that hinged on THE SHOES BELONGING TO A FARMER/A POOR PERSON right, so yours truly goes like ‘hey you know what I’m just gonna go read up on that painting so I can bullshit the exam if needed’, I go look that shit up and THE FIRST THING WIKIPEDIA SAID WAS THAT THE SHOES BELONGED TO VAN GOGH AND ANY CRAP ART HISTORIAN AT THEIR BEGINNING OF CAREER WILL KNOW THAT so why??? why??? that makes your entire dumb point FALL DOWN, WHY?????

other essay: heidegger decides to teach us all that THROUGH POETRY YOU CAN SEE WHAT LANGUAGE IS MADE OF, which you say okay fine, he’s gonna use more than one poet to prove his point, right? NO, he goes for german poet friederich hölderlin and nO ONE ELSE, and like you could already argue that if you’re discussing LANGUAGE using *one* poet just from your mother tongue is kind of stupid but nvm that, in the middle of the usual nonsense he goes like OH BECAUSE SINCE HIS POETRY WAS THAT GOOD/DEEP/WHATEVER HE COULD SEE THE TRUTH OF LANGUAGE™ THROUGH IT AND THAT MADE HIM GO INSANE, except that if you know anything about the dude’s life it’s pretty obvious that okay he had a bad mental breakdown at some point but the signs started being seen after his sweetheart died so like......... THAT WAS NOT ABOUT THE POETRY™ IT WAS ABOUT THE FACT THAT THIS POOR GUY ALREADY WAS MOST LIKELY SCHIZOPHRENIC AND THE GIRL’S DEATH MADE IT WORSE like it’s not a mystery so why

and that is just TWO things you can possibly grasp but like being and time is all like that about I’M EXPLAINING YOU THE MEANING OF EXISTENCE and honestly fuck that noise

now you’ll say okay that looks like this dude conned half of the world into thinking he was good but what’s the rest of it bc your vehement hatred of him can’t just be that

WELL POINT IS THE DUDE WAS A DAMN CERTIFIED NAZIST™ WHO WAS ALSO A HYPOCRITE TO BOOT AND I HATE HIS ASS TO DEATH

now we can start with the fact that he was a pupil of other important philosopher™ edmund husserl of whose work I’m not a fan but who personally I have nothing against, now this dude already planned to leave him his position but WAIT HE WAS JEWISH, what happens when hitler comes to power? he gets laid off ofc and heidegger SAYS NOTHING AND TAKES HIS PLACE AND REMOVED THE DEDICATION TO HIS FORMER MENTOR FROM THE 1941 EDITION OF BEING AND TIME and basically he never said or did shit against the regime and imvho it’s obvious reading his works that he... bought into it, but wait more on that later

on top of that the fact that he was supporting the regime/not doing anything against it and having affairs with his students two of which had jewish ancestry/were jewish JUST FUCKING IRKS ME because while I’m not gonna bitch about the affairs since he and his wife most likely had some... agreement bc his second son was from her lover not his but he recognized him anyway and he had affairs all around I suppose that was fine, but WHAT THE FUCK YOU’RE A PROFESSOR AND YOU FUCK YOUR STUDENTS? IDC THAT HALF OF ACADEMIA DOES IT YOU’RE STILL A PIG ffs

ANYWAY like the thing is that since everyone thinks he’s A GODDAMNED GENIUS (my ass) EVERYONE HAS CONSEQUENTLY IGNORED THAT HE SUPPORTED THE GODDAMNED REGIME EVEN IF JUST AFTER THE WAR HE WAS SIDE-EYED FOR THAT never mind that in some goddamne other essay from the 50s he compared concentration camps to industrialized agriculture and ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS, and like NO ONE ACTUALLY SAYS HEY YOU NEED TO STUDY THIS ASSHOLE BC HE’S IMPORTANT FOR CONTEMPORARY PHILOSOPHY BUT KEEP IN MIND THE NAZISM IS STRONG which would be honest naaaaah most people in academia used to pretend he just collaborated and the likes -

until someone published his private diaries a few years ago when it was obvious he was supporting the regime and suddenly 80% of academia was like:

BECAUSE OF COURSE HOW COULD SUCH A GENIUS HAVE AGREED WITH HITLER WELL he did fuck off

and you’ll say okay but why does it piss you off so much? IT DOES BECAUSE THEN I HAD TO SIT THROUGH LECTURES OF PEOPLE BITCHING ABOUT ANCIENT GREEK PHILOSOPHERS BEING MISOGYNISTS WHEN IT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THEIR THEORIES AND I WOULDN’T HAVE PRESUMED AN ANCIENT GREEK DUDE WOULD KNOW BETTER while I’d presume someone in nazi germany with a brain functioning would have known better and could have known better, but NO WE’RE IGNORING THAT BECAUSE WE CAN’T ADMIT THAT OUR PRECIOUS GENIUS WHO ALSO IS IMVHO NOT WAS A GODDAMNED HITLER SUPPORTER

AND I HATE THE WHOLE HYPOCRISY OF IT like please I don’t mind studying people’s work when I hate their ideology but I hate people pretending it wasn’t like that just because it would make the dude look bad yeah guess what idc also because 99% of what he said was bullshit anyway

tldr: the asshole was an unrepentant nazi supporter who didn’t really change that much after the war, 90% of his writings is incomprehensible and what’s comprehensible is basically ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME and on top of that he’s the reason why all contemporary philosophers can’t talk in understandable terms by the layman if you pay them to AND why everyone thinks we’re a bunch of stuck-up fucks who spend their time thinking about nothing and I really fucking hate that asshole’s guts and if there was ONE overrated person in the history of philosophy it was this piece of shit and that’s 100% of the reasons why I avoid contemporary philosophers like the plague if I can afford it :)

thanks this was my ted talk I hope you enjoyed it ;) ;)

#janie rants #martin heidegger for ts #philosophy for ts #from the bottom of my heart FUCK THIS ASSHOLE #ciaran #ask post

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rhetoricalrogue · 4 years ago

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31 Days of Wayhaven, Day 30

Prompt: Night Rating: G Words: 1,804 Characters: Cameron Buchanan, Nicolo Morelli Summary: This is the fic, if it were a show, that would be titled The Boys Talk About Their Feelings. AKA, Unit Delta (D for Demotion!) field missions are boring as hell. Note: The mention of a certain type of shapeshifting animal is a nod to the Wayhaven Writers Group and a certain Saturday book club reading.

For the @31daysofwayhaven event.

Stakeouts were usually the most boring thing Nicky could think of doing. Nothing usually happened on them and he hated staying still in one place. At least this time he was partnered up with his Commanding Agent so the company was good and he didn’t have to sit out in his car freezing his ass off alone.

“You think there’s going to be any movement?” he asked, taking a sip of his coffee. Drinking wasn’t the wisest idea he had, seeing that he’ll have to go out and find a tree or nearby bush take a piss behind sometime within the next hour or so, but the coffee was hot and he needed something to keep him awake. Napping while doing boring surveillance was a surefire way to make sure that something important did happen that he would unfortunately miss.

“Probably not.” Cam relaxed in the driver’s seat and grabbed a snack sized bag of chips he’d packed. Stakeouts always made him hungry and it was one of the few times that he liked to indulge in junk food and convenience store ready made meals, especially if Nicky was around. It was funny, the man had serious Opinions, capital O and everything, when it came to restaurant food, but the two of them could tear up a 7-11 if left alone without adult supervision, namely Penny and Winona. “Looks like this is another wasted evening.”

“I wouldn’t say that.” Nicky raised the night vision goggles he had been messing with and pointed towards some people who were walking away from their car. “I think that’s a drug deal.”

Cam, who had no need for night vision goggles, tracked Nicky’s finger and rolled his eyes. “Nick, those are kids. They look like they’re twelve.”

“Then they’re out past curfew. We should sneak up and scare the hell out of them.”

Cam gave him a disbelieving look before opening his chip bag. “I’m not going to scare a few kids just because they’re walking home in the dark.”

“Spoilsport.”

“You want to be the next cryptid creepypasta on Reddit or somewhere, be my guest. This isn’t the sixteen hundreds where you just had to worry about being stabbed if these kids were carrying knives, Nicky. Kids these days are probably carrying mace and knives and I for one do not wish to spend my evening cold and covered in pepper spray.”

Nicky caught Cam mumbling especially when I could be spending my evening someplace better under his breath. “So, scaring a few juveniles is out of the picture and we both know that tonight’s another wild evening of sitting in the car watching these two were...were-” he turned to Cam. “What sort of shapeshifters are they again?”

“Bears. The husband and wife are on thin ice for apparently attacking a home intruder. They shifted into bear form while attacking her because they were afraid for their children sleeping upstairs.”

Nicky ran a hand over his face. “You’ve got to be kidding me. We’re dealing with the case that some of the agents are dubbing the Goldilocks Affair?”

Cam sighed. “Look, I didn’t name it. I feel bad for them, they were just defending their home.”

“Yeah, but they could have beaned her upside the head with a bat, they didn’t have to practically claw her to death. From what I heard, the Agency had to go in as a group of doctors to memory wipe her and make her believe that she was out jogging in the woods when she slipped and fell down a ravine.”

“How did they make her injuries look like she fell? I saw the file report, there were definitely bite marks involved.”

“You got me, you know how I feel about the Agency when they start doing shady shit like this.”

Cam nodded, grabbing the binoculars on the dash and looking around the area. He paused when he saw the husband stare out the window, his hand at the curtain. “I can’t believe that these people think that we’re here as security, just in case the woman has friends who figure things out and want to retaliate.” He gave a brief wave back when the man waved at them.

Nicky dug in the plastic bag full of food and pulled out a waxed package. Unwrapping it, he took a bite of the handheld fried pie inside, the chocolate filling seeping out from the edges. “I guess it’s better than them being paranoid and knowing that we’re here to look into them to make sure they don’t start making a habit of eating people in the privacy of their own home.” Nicky stretched his long legs in front of him and started tapping a wordless tune on the car’s console as he chewed. “So, you and Penny, huh?”

Cam stiffened. He was wondering how long it would take for Nicky to bring that up. It had been a few days since Cam had told Nicky of his and Penny’s relationship, and he was surprised that it took their friend this long to start to pry again. “Yes, me and Penny. I thought we went over this already.”

Nicky grinned and playfully punched him in the arm. “We went over the fact that you and her were an item, and the fact that you were going to be a prude and not tell me a single sex-related thing, but we never really went over how the two of you went from sighing and mooning over the other when you thought the other wasn’t looking to holding hands and leaving socks on doorknobs.”

He rolled his eyes. “There’s not much to explain? I asked her out to dinner and made it clear that I wasn’t asking her out as a friend. She agreed and we spent the evening talking about how much we wanted our relationship to change.”

“That,” Nicky spat, flopping in his seat and leaning his head back dramatically against the headrest, “has got to be the most boring of how I met my girlfriend stories I’ve ever heard. Where is the drama? The emotion? The sizzling lust that finally gets to ignite after years of longing?”

Cam laughed. “Sorry to disappoint.”

“This is the worst. Twenty years, I’ve waited for payoff to all the pining and this is what I get? Disgusting.”

“Well, we can’t all be you, Nicky. When are you going to tell me about you and your surprise wife?” As if by magic, Nicky’s phone lit up with a text notification from Isabela.

“Speak of the devil,” he murmured, swiping at his phone and giving the picture on his lock screen a fond smile before opening up their chat. “I told her I’d be working tonight, but she was free to text. Didn’t think that you would want to hear me whisper sweet nothings into my phone or else I would have said that it would have been okay for her to call me.”

“Thanks,” Cam deadpanned, finishing his chips and digging into the bag for the sandwich he’d bought. “But Nicolo, are you actually okay with this? I mean, the woman put a spell on you that won’t let you die, didn’t try to find you and made it impossible for you to find her when she was pregnant with your daughter, and from what you told us, stabbed you to death when you went to meet her.”

Nicky shrugged. “We all have our flaws.”

“Nicky, she killed you. You were dead on her kitchen floor. If that’s not a red flag that this relationship is toxic, I don’t know what is.”

“And I’ve been dead in many other places over the course of my life, that isn’t new.” Nicky had a faint smile on his face as he finished texting. “This, Cameron. This talking with a woman and slowly getting to know her instead of heavily flirting just to get into her bed for a brief fling? This is new.”

“And what do you think about it?”

“I don’t know yet. Part of me doesn’t want to put too much hope in this working out because I don’t want to be disappointed if the other shoe drops, but part of me does want this to work out.” He lifted his phone as it vibrated with her reply. “I’ve gotten to know my daughter, Cam. Having a family wasn’t quite the first thing on my mind back when I was still alive. I thought I had time to play around and be the romantic, but really I was just being a fool. And I’ve continued to be the fool all these years because it was easier to fall back on that aspect of my life instead of growing up.”

Cam shook his head. “Come on, Nicky, I think you’re not giving yourself enough credit. You’ve been a fine asset to this unit and there’s no one else I’d trust to have my back than you.”

“Thanks, you don’t know how much that means to me.” He looked at him. “And you know that I trust you and our team with mine. You’re my brother, Cameron, even if I am older than you by a few centuries.”

“Family is important, and I hope that whatever happens with yours works out for you.” He paused. “But really, what do you think will happen between you and Isabela? Will you ask her to come here? Would you leave the Agency?”

“I don’t know. You know how Facility life is, Cam. She’s a witch who’s had her own space for centuries, she’d hate it here.” Nicky laughed as he took another sip of his coffee. “Then again, could you see me as a civilian? I wouldn’t know what to do with myself, especially since I wouldn’t have the same salary to buy all the shiny new gadgets I can get my hands on here, not to mention having disposable income to get bespoke clothing whenever I feel like it.”

“I’ve seen stranger things, though I’ve got to admit, seeing you in a day job? That would be the weirdest sight of all. What would you even do?”

“I could always be a food critic.”

Cam snorted, but hid the sound by opening up a can of soda. “Well, whatever you decide to do, I’m sure that you would be brilliant at it.” He eyed him. “And don’t take this the wrong way, I’m not pushing you out of the unit either. I would love to have you around forever.”

“An eternity watching werebear houses and making sure that little tea shops run by witches were up to code?” Nicky drained his coffee cup and reached into the bag for an energy drink Winona would have had a conniption over if she’d been there to see him drink. . “Count me in.”

#31daysofwayhaven #my writing #Unit Charlie #cameron buchanan #nicolo morelli

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ladyreapermc · 5 years ago

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Fic: Catching Feelings 4/? (Keanu x OFC)

Summary: AU in which Keanu is down on his luck after he comes to Hollywood trying to be an actor. To earn some money, he joins this app for escorts and meets Steph, a rising star who hires him to try to forget her ex. Neither of them are expecting to fall in love and all the problems it brings. Previous chapters: 1 2 3

Author’s Notes: Once again, thank you for all the lovely feedback. They really make my day. Here we are with a new chapter. Let’s get on with the angst.

Wordcount: 3146

Warnings: smut (unprotected sex; prostitution).

His new jeans were still a little uncomfortable tight and the t-shirt felt a little itchy even if the fabric was soft against his skin and, as Keanu looked at himself in the mirror of the bathroom, he couldn’t understand how he looked so different when he was wearing the same type of clothes he always did.

Maybe it wasn’t about looking different but feeling it. The fabric covering his body right now cost more than two months of rent for his apartment and that was a strange thing to know. Also strange was the fact that Steph bought all of this for him in a blink of an eye, without hesitation or asking him anything in return. Keanu didn’t know what to do with that. Only that it didn’t feel right. It felt like he was taking advantage of her, of her kindness and it made him feel like a piece of shit.

“Ke, you’re ready?” she called out and he smiled at the nickname. He loved how it sound in her voice.

“Yeah,” he combed his fingers through his hair one last time, before stepping out of the guest room, jacket hanging from his arm.

He found Steph sitting on the couch while putting on her ankle boots. She was dressed in a short black dress that hung above her knees and accentuated her gorgeous curves and he felt the familiar stirring of arousal in his belly. He could just flip her skirt and fuck her senseless right there on the couch.

“I know that look,” she said with a smirk as she stood. Even in heels, she was so much shorter than him. “Not yet, lover boy.”

She grabbed the tweed coat that was laying beside her and led the way to the garage and threw him the car keys, which Keanu caught more out of reflex than anything.

“Can you drive, please? I hate doing it in heels.”

Keanu nodded, getting the door for her, before sliding onto the driver’s seat of her Audi, hands caressing the soft leather of the wheel as he admired the vehicle.

“Do you want me to give you two a moment?”

“Sorry,” Keanu replied with a chuckle, starting the engine and groaning as it purred to life. This was one hell of a machine.

“Are you sure? I think this car is turning you on more than I do,” Steph teased as she got the gate open and Keanu flashed her a grin.

“Nothing turns me on more than you do,” he assured, maneuvering the car into the street and Steph smirked.

“That’s good,” she said, turning her body his way and glancing at Keanu under her lashes. “Because the car didn’t forego its underwear just so you could fuck it in the club’s restroom.” She pulled her skirt up high enough so Keanu could catch a glimpse of her dark curls, before she pulled it back again, smoothing the fabric over her legs.

“Fuck Steph!” he hissed, his dick throbbing in his pants. “You can’t just do and say stuff like that when I’m driving.” She just chuckled in response, looking out the window.

“I’ll be good from now on. I promise.”

Steph did keep her word and dinner was a quite pleasant affair. They talked and laughed and ate some delicious dishes that Keanu couldn’t name for the life of him. He had only one glass of wine through the night so he could drive without breaking the law, while she worked her way through some of the sommelier’s suggestions.

Keanu cut her off after the third glass because her eyes were getting a little glazed and her speech slurred. If it was up to him, they would go straight home – and he didn’t want to think over the fact that he was thinking of her house as home – but Steph insisted that she was perfectly fine and still wanted to go out dancing.

He helped her back into her coat and tucked her closer to his body as they walked through the small mob of paparazzi waiting for her outside. Keanu was nearly blinded by all the flashes and questions shouted, but he managed to get her safely inside the car without any incidents.

“You’re ok?” she asked as he pulled the car into traffic, hand rubbing circles on his thigh. “I know how that can get overwhelming.”

“I’m fine, babe. A little blind,” he joked, making her chuckle, but it was weak. “You hate it, don’t you? That part? The lack of privacy?”

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” she sighed, looking out the window. “It makes me wonder if it’s all worth it sometimes.”

“Do you love what you do?” Keanu asked and Steph nodded, glancing at him as he caught her hand and squeezed lightly, making her smile. It actually reached her eyes this time around. “Then it’s worth it.”

“Thanks, Ke.”

Things went a lot easier in the night club Steph led him to. It was pretty exclusive and the bouncer waved them in as soon as he spotted her. They dropped off their coats and she led him straight to the bar, opening up a tab and asking for a shot of tequila.

“You’re sure you want to go straight for the hard stuff?” Keanu asked, shouting over the pounding beat of electronic music.

“Yes!” Steph declared, sprinkling salt on his hand, before licking it, swallowing her shot and sticking the lime in her mouth with a wince and head shake and Keanu just chuckled, ordering himself a beer, before following her to the dance floor.

They danced most of the night. Well, Steph danced, Keanu stood close to her, swaying awkwardly from side to side. It made her giggle and pull him closer, trying to guide his movements with hands on his hips, but without much success.

She pressed her back against his chest, grinding against him and Keanu swallowed hard, mouth going dry and skin even more overheated in the bad illuminated club. He knew she was doing it on purpose by the way Steph pushed her ass against his crotch, bringing his hands to her thighs. Better men than Keanu would get a hard-on from that.

“I need a sec,” he said in her ear, feeling the vibrations of her laughter before he pulled away and headed for the restroom, washing his face with cold water to try to get himself under control.

Once Keanu was sure he was ok and his dick was under control, he checked his phone, noticing a few missed calls from his bandmates. He texted his apologies, promising to be at rehearsal tomorrow, before pocketing his phone and heading back into the club.

A small wave of panic caught him when Keanu didn’t spot Steph right away. She had a little too much to drink and was vulnerable to creeps. He should never have left her side. He was there to take care of her, keep her safe.

“Hey buddy,” he called out to the bartender, catching his attention. “Did you see the girl I was with?”

“Steph?” he asked, and Keanu should’ve known she was a regular there. He nodded and the bartender gestured over Keanu’s shoulder. He turned around to look, catching sight of Steph arguing with her ex at the balcony of the VIP area.

Keanu made a beeline to the stairs, worry increasing by the second, but was stopped at the stairs by a bouncer.

“Sorry pal, can’t go up without a bracelet.”

“My…” he hesitated, unsure of how to describe Steph. “Friend is up there.”

“Sure, they are,” the bouncer snorted in disbelief, blocking the way, arms crossed over his chest. Keanu took a moment to evaluate the situation. He could probably take this guy, even if he wasn’t much of a fighter but that would get too much attention and he knew that was the last thing Steph wanted.

With worry still twisting his guts, Keanu stepped back his gaze shifting to the couple in the VIP lounge. What had looked like a heated argument moments ago had shifted into an intimate conversation. Kevin was crowding her space; his hand tracing patterns on Steph’s arm as he spoke in her ear. Jealousy burned in the pit of his stomach and something in his chest ached.

Keanu had been so stupid to let himself believe this thing between them could be anything more than some adventure to her; some crazy fun. Hire a hooker, sleep with him while she was on a break with her boyfriend. Maybe even let herself be photographed so he could see and be jealous. Keanu meant nothing to her, and he should’ve known.

He snorted at his own naivety and moved away, grabbing his jacket on his way out. The cool drizzle falling made him hug himself as he hailed a cab. When Keanu got inside the car, he thought he heard his name being called out, but ignored it.

---

In the first couple of weeks, Steph would send him requests every day. They hadn’t shared phone numbers and the Mars and Venus chat was only available when both parties accepted the transaction. So, Keanu kept refusing it until she gave up; even if it broke his heart every time he got a new notification and saw it wasn’t her.

Keanu shoved the clothes she bought him to the back of his closet and made sure to keep himself oblivious to any news that featured her. He blacklisted her name on his google news notifications and avoided all gossip magazines whenever he stopped by the newsstand to buy himself some cigarettes. If Steph’s face showed up on his TV, he made sure to change the channel as quickly as he could.

Instead, he threw himself into his band and work. He upped his price again on Mars and Venus and Keanu really thought that would make his requests drop, but it only seemed to encourage these women. Like Scott had told him, they were mostly older, some widowers or divorcees who wanted a company for the night or something pretty one their arms for an event. Every once in a while, a married one would hire him to make her husband jealous.

Keanu made clear from their first interactions in the chat that he wouldn’t sleep with them and most of them accepted his conditions. Some still tried to seduce him, but he remained adamant even if he felt attracted to them. He was never good at keeping feelings away from sex so he couldn’t let himself be vulnerable to what happened with Steph.

After a month, he had made enough to get himself a better apartment and moved away from the one he had shared with Scott. Keanu was even managing to send some money back home, help his mom and sisters a little. He didn’t feel as awkward about being an escort anymore and got quite apt at hiding his face whenever he was out with a client in an event and someone happened to snap a picture. Keanu liked to keep his anonymity.

He still worked at the bike shop, more out of habit and love for bikes than actual need and Dogstar finally managed to record their first demo. Now they only needed a producer to give them a chance.

With all that was going on in his life, Keanu managed to push Steph mostly out of his mind. She still haunted his dreams, but there was nothing he could do about that. It wasn’t all that surprising that he was caught off guard when Gard called out his name one day, holding the phone against his chest.

“Ke, there’s a woman on the phone wanting to talk to you about a bike.”

Figuring it was just a customer he had helped in the shop, Keanu didn’t think twice about answering with a quiet greeting.

“Hi,” she breathed out and it was enough to make his heart hammer against his chest. “Please don’t hang up. I’ll be quick, I promise.”

“How did you get this number?” Keanu asked, his voice breaking a little and Gard shot him a worried look.

“I researched all bike custom shops in Los Angeles until I find one owned by a Gard,” Steph explained, and he could hear the small sad smile in her voice. “I know you don’t want to see or talk to me, but your bike has been sitting in my garage for a month and I know how much it means to you so I just wanted to know if you want me to arrange it to be sent to Gard’s shop or…”

“No,” he cut her off, squeezing his hand into a fist to keep it from shaking. “I’ll pick it up. Can I?”

“Of course, Keanu. It’s yours,” Steph replied with a sigh. “I’m leaving for France in a couple of weeks until then…”

“I’ll pick it up tonight,” he said running his fingers through his hair. Keanu should just get this over with. “Is eight, ok?”

“Sure.”

Keanu hung up without saying goodbye, dropping the phone and rushing to the restroom, dry heaving on the toilet as his lungs struggled to catch a breath. He thought he was over this. Over her. Apparently, he had been wrong.

At eight, Keanu stepped out of the cab in front of a house he thought he would never see again. His hand shook as he pressed the call button on the intercom, hearing the electric buzz of the lock releasing. Steph saw him through the security camera and let him in without a word.

His foot felt like they weighed a ton as he crossed the red brick pathway to her front door, which was pulled open before he could even reach the porch. Keanu froze at the sight of Steph standing there, oversized t-shirt – his he realized – and dark leggings, her hair falling messily around her round face, her brown eyes sad and hesitant as she watched him.

And he knew he was going to regret it later but he stalked towards her, hooking an arm around her waist and catching her lips in a kiss. Her arms wrapped around his neck and her legs coming around his waist as he lifted her up and pushed her against the wall, kicking the door shut with his heel.

Their kisses were hard and frantic, almost bruising as they all but tore each other’s clothes off, hands desperate to find skin they craved for. Keanu dipped his fingers inside her panties, spreading her wetness over her folds before his fingers pushed inside her, making Steph gasp and claw at his shoulders. He hissed against her neck, biting at the tendon, his cock throbbing and aching for her.

“I need you inside me,” Steph gasped, tugging at his hair to make him look at her. “Right now.”

“I don’t have any condoms with me,” Keanu said, rubbing at her clit to make her moan and rock her hips.

“I don’t care,” she whimpered, pulling him closer again for another hard kiss. “Just fuck me, Ke.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he grunted, her tone making him just as desperate for her. He pulled his fingers away from her cunt long enough to rip her underwear away and line himself against her opening.

They moaned together as he pushed inside, the feel of her walls quivering and stretching to accommodating him, hot and wet and so goddamn tight nearly driving him to the edge.

Keanu held her against the wall, his hands probably leaving bruised on her soft skin as he supported her weight and started to thrust into her.

Steph groaned, her hands grabbing at his hair, squeezing to the point of pain as she gasped and panted against his mouth and Keanu could taste the wine in her lips as their breaths mingled together and he swallowed her curses and praises.

“Yes, Ke. Just like that,” she pleaded, head thudding against the wall as he sped up his movements. “You’re gonna come inside me, babe? Fill me up?”

“Fuck yes!” he grunted, and she bit on his lip and ran her tongue over to soothe the sting. “I wanna see my cum dripping out of you.”

Steph whimpered again, her hand sneaking between their bodies to swirl her own clit and Keanu could tell she was close by the needy little cries and the way her walls were squeezing him. He was nearly at his limit too, pleasure building on the base of his spine and making his body hypersensitive and his movements uncoordinated.

“I’m gonna…” he warned, thrusting a couple of more times before his climax made his vision white-out for a second and he almost missed the way Steph moaned his name as she came too, cunt pulsing around him deliciously.

Keanu locked his knees together, his thighs quivering with the effort of keeping himself and Steph upright. He gulped huge gasps of breath as she ran her fingers through his sweaty hair almost soothingly.

“Let’s go to bed,” she invited, pressing soft little kisses over his face and Keanu sighed. He wanted to say yes. He really did.

“I can’t. I have a client.”

“Oh.” Steph’s eyes clouded for a second before she looked away from him and nodded. “Better put me down then. You don’t want to be late.”

“No,” Keanu sighed, letting go of her legs so she could stand on her own. “Can I…?” he gestured towards her bathroom and she nodded, still not looking his way.

He felt like a jerk as he cleaned himself up and tucked himself back into his jeans. When Keanu stepped out, Steph had put his shirt back on, but he could still see the evidence on their desperation on the marks on her neck.

“I’m sorry,” he said touching his own neck and she shrugged.

“They’ll fade,” she said, leading the way to the garage where his bike was parked right next to her car, the keys inside his helmet.

“I wasn’t getting back together with him, you know?” Steph said, starting Keanu. “He tried to sweet-talk me, but I knew he was only doing it so I could put a good word for him with Fincher. Which I wasn’t gonna do.”

“Oh,” Keanu said dumbly, guilt making bile rise to his throat and he swallowed around the painful lump and looked away. “You deserve better anyway.”

“I know,” she nodded and stepped up to him, kissing his cheek so gently and affectionately, it brought tears to his eyes. “Goodbye, Keanu.”

He didn’t manage to say anything in response before she had the garage door open for him. Keanu looked at her one last time, his throat blocked by sorrow as he put on his helmet and sped away from her house and her life. Or so he thought.

xxx (tbc) xxx

go to part 5

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#keanu reeves #keanu reeves fanfic #keanu reeves imagine #keanu reeves x ofc #keanu reeves x original character #fanfic #smut #series #catching feelings #original character

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the-explodin-kittins · 4 years ago

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theimperfetc:

spankfuckabuseme:

Oh Tumblr, I have quite the story for you today. I’m back from my break with quite the cautionary tale. My message? Don’t fucking trust people from the internet. I know this, I really do, I’ve been burned by crazies here before. But the sociopaths just keep getting smarter and better at lying. Take this to heart, learn from my mistakes and naivety. Just because it happened to me doesn’t mean it has to happen to you too.

So here’s a tale about how I got catfished on tumblr.

A few months back, I got to know a fellow blogger, @silence-in-submission and her Daddy, @thewolfsdarklair/@kinginthesheets. I was talking with both of them for a bit, but then things got a bit more personal and serious between Wolf and I. We got to know each other, had a lot in common, and started messaging on Kik damn near constantly. He told me he was a single dad, and that his ex walked out when his son was 3 months old and it’s been just him ever since. I’ve never actually trusted anyone on tumblr enough to give them more than a few details about myself, but this slimeball is good at making you trust him and charming the pants off women, myself included. He made himself into the perfect man and played the part well. He used my vulnerable state of going through a divorce to weasel his way into my heart.

BUT! Though shady, this isn’t even the most scandalous part of my tale…yes, I’m a piece of shit man stealer, I’ll own that. But try to keep up, so far we have a tumblr submissive, and a tumblr girlfriend. Girlfriend knows about submissive, submissive does not know about girlfriend. Read on.

Anyways, we start chatting more and more often and he tells me how amazing and special I am, I’m the most incredible woman he’s ever known. I let him into my life enough to show him pics and videos of my son and I. My sweet kiddo blew this monster kisses on FaceTime. He shows me photos and videos of his son and himself. Snuggling on the couch, coaching his sons T-Ball games. Father of the year, swoon! Plays up the single dad card, hard. He messages me nonstop, “good morning beautiful” every morning, phone calls on our commutes to work daily. We had the same favorite bands. We both loved to cook. He told me about his family. His careers. He would message me links to sweet country songs of how he felt about me. My ringtone for him was “Crave You” by Thomas Rhett, I legit bought a damn ringtone for this dickwad because that was “our” song. He would conveniently disappear over weekends, busy with his single dad gig, but in reality he was otherwise occupied.

It was soon, but man I was sure I was in love with this joker. My dumb ass bought a plane ticket to see him, with his enthusiastic blessing. I was supposed to go see and stay with him over Easter weekend. We were both so excited! We could finally be in each other’s arms at last, he said it felt like “I had been his for a lifetime” already. We were going to sight see in his city, cook dinner together and have loads of crazy, kinky sexy. I had a countdown app on my phone counting the days, minutes and seconds until I was with this amazing man. He conveniently disappeared from the face of the earth a few days before and surfaces the afternoon before my flight to tell me he’s out of the country for work and he’s so sorry but I have to cancel my trip. I thought it was odd he flew out of the country without a heads up, but he said it was super last minute and he needed to make arrangements for where his son would stay when he was gone. He was “overseas” for over a week before he told me I would have to cancel my trip. He’s gunna make it up to me 10fold, he misses me, he loves me. Ya know, it was fishy, but shit happens with work. I was devastated and mad he didn’t tell me sooner he was away on work. But here I am, out the better part of $500. He’s “out of the country” for another week and once he’s back, I sent a care package to him and his son of stuff for them. I went to copy and paste the address he gave me and google popped up with the address and it was a commercial building, not a home. Strange. I asked him on the phone why he gave me a fake address, and he casually told me it was the building he worked in. Still strange, why wouldn’t I send it to your house? Oh well. I was so excited to send something from me to him. It was super cute, love letter with cartoon hearts at all. I’m a SUPER thoughtful and romantic person, I went all out asking him if he would be my boyfriend “officially”. I got him stuff from his favorite shows and movies, same with his son, and here I am out more money on this joker. He thought it was super cute, said his son loved the books and he loved the figurines I sent him.

So we plan another trip, two actually. He tells me he’s flying here for the weekend April 26-30th. My son had a brief stay in the hospital due to illness and he was the perfect boyfriend during the whole ordeal, calling while I was at the hospital and cooing “awww poor buddy” when my son would cry. Messaging to make sure we were ok. Everything is going well, we’re released from the hospital and my boyfriend will be here in less than a week! Ahhhh! I just moved to a new house and I’m working on making it presentable and homey for us to nestle up in over the long weekend. I got us tickets to see Infinity War together. We were going to go dancing and I had a babysitter! Yet again, the same as the last trip, he falls off the face of the earth for “work.” This was on Friday the 20th and I have yet to hear from him again and as far as he knows, he thinks I still think he’s planning to come here Thursday and he hasn’t said a word to me! I’m sure he was planning an elaborate work story for this Wednesday to message me with, but I’m sure he will see all of this before then and hopefully not waste his time. We also had plans for me to pick him up from a nearby town May 7th after a work trip that would bring him back this way so soon! I was so lucky, I get to have the man I love sleeping next to me two weeks in a row?! Luckiest girl ever, so spoiled.

But…something just felt…off? the other day. My PTSD from him canceling the last trip was making this past weekend feel eerily familiar. He was off the radar again, I was sick with worry, and I had the impending doom feeling in my gut. Part of me knew there were never any plane tickets.

I had ran a background check on him previously and most things he told me checked out. His age, where he lives, his family members he has mentioned in passing. No marriages or crazy criminal charges listed (but man, 20 was a rough year for you, wasn’t it man?) I missed a small detail the first go around. I missed an eviction suit from last year, with a codefendent listed of the female variety that I was positive wasn’t a family member. Facebook to the rescue, and to my utter dismay, his codefendent was in fact his WIFE since 2015, the MOTHER of his son who supposedly bailed, and they have ANOTHER son who recently turned 1! His wife also may or may not currently be pregnant with number 3, I’m not positive. Oh my. All the happy family photos, I swear to you I threw up where I was at when this news sunk in. The man who said he saw a future with me, saw marriage with me, couldn’t wait for us and our kids (the one I knew about anyways) to all be together at last. We casually discussed me moving to be closer to him in the future if our trips went well. If this would have played out longer, who knows how much of my life I would have ruined for the lies this man told me. But…he already had a happily ever after.

I had been fooled. And not to any fault of my own, other than my naivety. I’m not an idiot, I did my due diligence and did a background check, but one little line on there was missed and I ignored all the little details about him that were sketchy because of the way he made me feel with his words. This man is an expert liar and sociopath. Who knows what shit he spins to his wife to cover his ass with his online affairs. I feel so bad for her. I feel so bad for anyone else he’s involved with. I feel so bad for myself for getting mixed up with this mess. I hate that I didn’t trust my gut when I felt like he was too good to be true, because part of me always knew he was too good to be true. The last photo is the last contact he had with me last Friday, keep in mind he’s supposed to be flying to see me Thursday supposedly. Oh and PLOT TWIST! The child he said he was a single dad to? Send me photos and videos of? I sent him a carepackage? IT’S NOT HIS CHILD. It’s his wives from another man! So he exploited a child that’s NOT EVEN HIS.

Silence, I felt, and still feel dirty, for beginning a relationship with a man who was already in a D/s dynamic, but he said he wanted more with me than that - led me to believe you were just a hobby and I was the real deal. He told me to say the word and you would be gone, that I was “so much more to him than that.” Led me to believe he was slowly breaking things off with you to be with me completely. And I sincerely bought into it, unfortunately. I thought he had told you about me when I sent you those cryptic messages a few weeks ago. I also played along when he sent me fake messages to screenshot to calm you down. The messages telling me to back off from your dynamic in February we’re also fake. I know, I’m an awful bitch for toeing in on your property, but you’ve got to know he played us both the same and I fell for it hook, line and sinker. What I did wasn’t right, I’m sorry, but we’re both victims here and I’m glad I was able to uncover the truth about this piece of shit. It’s not us. There’s nothing wrong with you, beautiful girl, this man is a selfish monster, don’t let this ruin you and for the love of god don’t believe whatever lies he’s going to tell you to keep you around. You can do better. We both can.

My dearest N, you sociopathic anal hemorrhage. I know you thought you were smart, how could this crazy little 20 some girl blow up your spot? You’re alpha, established, educated, and wise. You had it all figured out. There’s no way that your loving B would ever be suspicious of you, because I just LOVED you so extremely, right? All you need is love, baby. Well, love be but a feeling and though I felt it strongly for the person I thought you were, logic and the truth always win. I’m not an idiot, honey, and I fucking figured it out. The lies roll off your tongue like cotton candy. You know all the right things to say. But you can’t talk your way out of this explosion, buddy. I hope the lies and drama were worth the shitstorm you’re about to experience. You say you don’t do drama but my sweet idiot, you ARE drama. I’m sure you can understand why I had to go and message your wife every conversation, detail, photo and video you’ve ever sent me because being a Libra, you’re all about justice, my badass teddy bear. I’m sure you’re tempted to lash out now and try to hurt ME by sharing the intimate pictures and videos I sent to you of myself, but let me remind you that’s called “revenge porn” and given your job, you know that isn’t legal. Every person you cross paths with is either a blessing or a lesson, and though I KNOW my presence is a motherfucking blessing, you’re gunna learn this goddamn lesson today, fuckboy.

So let this be a lesson.

1. Block this dude. Both of his accounts. He’s bad news. There’s good people on tumblr, and we don’t need this sociopath muddying our waters. I’m sure he will resurface with a new blog, but heed this cautionary tale. 2. Don’t ignore red flags because of sweet words. Actions speak louder than words. 3. Don’t meet people from the internet without a background check, and check it thoroughly and use every tool the internet gives you to verify family members and details about the person you’re meeting. A person can be anyone they want to be online, and men like this think they’re invincible. 4. Make someone work hard to earn your heart. Even if someone seems to check all the boxes and seems like your perfect man, if he is, he will earn your heart - you won’t have to give it to him with hesitations, you won’t have to wonder at night when you’ll hear from him next.

I don’t know if this asshole is a prick, a sociopath, a monster, or if he just thinks he’s smarter than everyone else. Well, he’s not. Not for long enough. If you know of this vaguely human-shaped piece of shit, then spread the word. He shouldn’t have contact with anything more than the fucking curb. I expect both his blogs to be gone pretty much right away here, but he’s obviously an addict to this kind of behavior. He’ll be back and looking to get his kicks off of the vulnerable again.

Be careful who you let in this deep, people are more fucked up than you know. If something seems off, look into it harder. And trust your gut. Mine knew something was wrong with this sack of bees with a face, but didn’t step in in time.

@thewolfsdarklair you’re narcissistic enough to be reading this. Fuck you. With a rusty garden rake, in a counterclockwise swirl, in the lemon and salt depository of hell.

#douchecanoe

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uncloseted · 5 years ago

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Effy’s Closet Watches Skins: 303 “Thomas”

Hey guys! Sorry for the delay in this recap. I actually did a whole thing and then promptly restarted my computer and deleted it all. But hopefully that means I just had that much more time to think about this episode and this recap will be a really good one. More after the cut...

- The first thing I want to say is I love the images of Thomas at the very end of the intro. You may not have noticed this, but for each episode, the intro ends with two shots of the character whose episode it is. In Thomas' case, the first shot is of him alone in a field, turned away from the camera. He's in a new place, totally isolated. And in the next one, he's looking up, optimistically and cheerfully. This is new to him, but he's going to figure it out.

- The first shot is this gorgeous view of the city, juxtaposed with Thomas' rundown, abandoned flat. It's dingy and there's trash everywhere. We don't see Thomas yet. Just a close up of his hands putting down his cassette player and a photo of his family. Already, we know what's important to Thomas- he's musical, and he cares about his family more than anything else. The music starts playing, and we pan up to see Thomas with a big smile on his face, practicing in the dusty mirror- "hello! I am Thomas! So glad to meet you!" South African rapper Mapaputsi's song "Kleva" is what Thomas is listening to. It's juxtaposed with images of Bristol- the Union Jack on a flagpole outside his building, the English flag flying off of someone's balcony. Already, we've been introduced to the core of Thomas's dilemma throughout his entire time on the show- how much is he Congolese? How much is he British? How much should he assimilate to British culture?

Thomas does an adorable dance in his layers and layers of coats, hats, and gloves. This flat may look dingy to us, but to Thomas, it's luxury, and he's clearly so happy to be here. He sets up his toothbrush and toothpaste with love, cleans some of the trash up, and sets out his sleeping mat. The water in his shower comes out brown at first, but it's okay! It goes clear eventually. The color of his skin contrasted against the red tile in the bathroom is gorgeous. The camera lingers for a second on Thomas' necklace that he later gives to Pandora- this is a necklace that's clearly important to him.

- Thomas exits his flat and looks out over his new city. A woman comes out of her flat with her young son. Thomas introduces himself, just as he practiced, with a big smile. The little boy responds, "hello!" before getting dragged away by his mother. Clearly she's not quite as excited to meet Thomas as he is to meet her, and he looks a little bit put down about it.

- Thomas calls his own mother, and she's not too different to the mother we just saw. Thomas excitedly tells her that everything is great, that he found a super cool flat, that he's excited for her to see it, it's super luxury, really incredible... and all she wants to know is has he found a job. "Yes!" He lies, "I'm a sweeper... it's super easy", but before she can ask further, his card runs out of minutes. He goes to the convenience store where he bought the card, saying "I bought this card for 120 minutes!" The guy behind the counter is not having it. Like Thomas, he's an immigrant, but he seems less than sympathetic to Thomas' plight. "My mother, she'll be very, very upset...." starts Thomas, and we get another insight into his personality. He cares very much about what his overly critical mother thinks and wants to do her proud and prevent her from being angrier at him. Thomas digs in his pocket for more money, desperate to call his mother back, when some young English kids come into the store and begin stealing candy. The man takes out his baseball bat to go and intimidate the boys, but Thomas' focus is on the donuts. Finally, he rips himself away to get involved in the fight that's quickly escalating in the shop. A side note: the till in the shop says "no change given for the telephone", so it seems like maybe people try to rip this guy off frequently, or maybe he's just stingy. Anyway, Thomas pulls one of the kids away and has a lovely little line, "cunt is a very bad word! Even in England, I think..." Then his attention changes to the man, "what is this Paki they call you? Is that bad?" And the man responds, "I'm from Delhi, I hate Pakis!" I'm not sure why I love this line so much, but I do. I guess it's because there's something so ridiculous and human about someone who was just targeted for their race being like, "I object to what you said because I also hate the group you just associated me with!" The shopkeeper appreciates Thomas' help and rewards Thomas with a big bag of donuts, and Thomas looks pleased with himself that he could be of service. As we find out through generation 2, Thomas is someone who takes honor very seriously, and who always wants to do the right thing (even when he's not totally sure what the right thing is).

- At this point, if this is your first time watching the episode, you're probably wondering, "who are all those hooligans that we saw in the other two episodes, and who is this kid?" But the show has a way of getting us to care about characters, and Thomas is no exception. Anyway, he sits down at a bus stop to eat his donuts, and the camera pulls out. Surprise! There are Effy and Pandora, just waiting to meet this new boy who will eventually be very, very important to them. And of course it's Effy and Pandora- who else would make friends with a random boy at a bus stop? Maybe it's a bit ridiculous, but Pandora is ridiculous, and Thomas is a bit ridiculous, so the whole thing works really nicely. At this point, I also want to point out that his series 4 episode starts in a similar way. Instead of focusing on Thomas, it focuses on a new character, one we've never seen before, Sophia. She walks by all of the main characters of gen 2, but instead of finding her Pandora, someone who will reach out to her and help her fit in... she jumps. Skins is brilliant sometimes. Back to the plot, Pandora is eyeing Thomas' donuts. It's hard not to, Thomas is eating them so enthusiastically. Meanwhile, Effy is sitting disinterestedly, smoking a spliff and holding an Irn Bru. Thomas belatedly realizes that he thinks he's being rude, and says, "of course! I have too many!" and offers Pandora one. He offers Effy one, and she turns him down. "Effy doesn't do donuts... [she does] drugs!" explains Pandora. This is Thomas' first proper introduction to the idea that England has very different morals from Congo, but he's willing to see what happens. Pandora takes a bunch of hits of the joint, and Thomas looks concerned (as he should be, given what happens next). Thomas gives this cute small smile, like he likes this girl in spite of himself. Effy looks super done with this whole situation, but Thomas doesn't seem to clock that. He reaches out to shake her hand, like he practiced- "Hello! My name is Thomas! So glad to meet you!" I wish I had something insightful to say about this interaction, but really I don't. Thomas' energy compared to Effy's apathy is sort of funny, and I think again highlights the fact that the English are very different from the Congolese (or at least, from Thomas).

Pandora pukes, and Effy is disgusted because this is the second time in two episodes that Pandora has done that. Thomas throws Pandora over his shoulder like a goat, and they go to Effy's house. Between these scenes, her boots changed from awful vinyl knee highs to her normal Sancho boots, but that still doesn't save this outfit for me. What are those pearls, Effy? Taking some fashion tips from Katie, I see...

- They enter the house, and Thomas pronounces it incredible. Effy seems surprised by this, because she thinks of it as just a normal house, and it's a nice moment that underlines that Thomas had a very different upbringing from the rest of the gang. There's also a blink and you'll miss it moment where Thomas realizes his hand is on Pandora's ass, and he looks just a little pleased before being all, "I must do the honorable thing!" and moving it. They bring her upstairs and plunk her down on a chair. "I think maybe these donuts are no good for you" he says with an incredibly endearing smile. It's so obvious that he likes Pandora despite the fact that she's puking and overall just a total mess. "Yeah, that must be it," Effy says, and she's warming up to him a bit. She offers a little smile... and then she hears some noises from the other room. Her suspicions have been confirmed- her mum is indeed having an affair. Thomas barges in and introduces himself to Anthea and Steve, breaking the tension, and Effy seems to appreciate it, giving him that little smile again. Then she looks down, I guess because she's trying to process this, but it's hard to know what she's thinking. Is it an "oh shit, I was hoping that this wasn't true" or is it a "fuck, now I have to keep this secret"? It's hard to tell.

- Thomas tries to make nice with his bitchy neighbor again- "good evening!" and she shuts the door without saying anything. Thomas is clearly upset that she doesn't like him. He goes to sleep and then is rudely awakened with a punch to the head. Surprise! It's Johnny White, he owns this flat, and Thomas is squatting there. One wonders whether his bitchy neighbor turned him in. This scene is great because Johnny's thugs are pure nonsense. Johnny is trying to be serious, but clearly his thugs don't really know what they're doing and aren't very bright. One of them (I think his name is Bennie) is played by the same guy as Mini's mum's boyfriend, but I don't think they're meant to be the same character. "Put the kettle on, please, lads," Johnny instructs, and they sit there staring at the kettle. Heavy goes to say something, changes his mind, waits a few moments, and then offers up, "It's taking a long time there, boss." The second thug comments, "I keep saying, like. Probably shouldn't watch it. You know?" Hilarious. Skins does such a great job with its comedic extras. The water eventually boils and Johnny White pours it into a cup noodles with tobacco sauce and downs it, because he wants Thomas to "know what kind of man he's dealing with".

Thomas mostly looks disgusted and a bit confused at what he's suppsoed to take away from this. Mostly he seems concerned about Johnny littering. He demands that Thomas give him "£300 deposit by Desperate Housewives on Thursday." There's a great interaction between the thugs that you might miss if you're not paying attention: "JOHNNY: Say goodnight to Thomas, boys. MAN 2: See ya, cocker. MAN 1: Cheers, Thommo. All the best. MAN 2: Be lucky. MAN 1: He seemed like a nice lad to me. MAN 2: Yeah, but John's gonna fuck him. MAN 1: Oh, yeah. He is." What can I say? I'm a sucker for a punch clock villain.

- Thomas records a message for his family. Even though he's spent the majority of the episode complaining about the cold and his life has just been threatened, he tells them, "here, the sun shines just like at home and there are many wonderful people." He's an inherently optimistic person. He really believes that things are going to work out. He sings his siblings a song, which continues to play over a shot where Thomas (the only black person in the group) tries to get onto a truck so that he can do some construction work. One of the men tells him, "this isn't your work", but then takes pity on him and lets him know about a temp agency where they'll take anyone.

Thomas goes into the office and tries to make smalltalk with the woman placing him in a job. She asks for special skills, and he offers "I play all music. I run very, very fast. Like a dog. Also, I am mathematical. I will solve any equation." With each question she asks, he looks excited, like maybe this one will be the one where he has the right answer! But she deems that he has no special skills, qualifications, or experience of any kind, and his face falls. But still, he pushes on- "my mother is coming, you see, and she is a very fussy lady". Even in the face of literal gangster Johnny White, Thomas is most afraid of his mother.

- Thomas is now a janitor at Roundview, because of course he is. He cleans the hallway very thoroughly and admires his work. Then the bell rings, and a hoard of students come through completely destroying all the work Thomas just did. He looks crestfallen. Effy walks by, but she doesn't notice him, or maybe she doesn't recognize him. We get a really great and iconic interaction between Katie and Effy here. Effy is clearly still preoccupied with her mum's affair, and Katie still just wants Effy to like her, I guess because Effy still isn't giving her the time of day and that only makes Katie want her validation more. "KATIE: Effy! Effy! Effy! Excuse me! Effy, hi! Look. I got a new top. It's cool, isn't it? When you've got tits like mine, you've gotta flash them haven't you? EFFY: Sorry? KATIE: Breasts, girl. You should try it. EFFY: I never try." Katie looks genuinely confused by this, like she doesn't understand what sort of game Effy is playing. Katie's whole life is about trying, and so the idea that she just... wouldn't... is perplexing to her, I think especially because Effy has everything Katie tries so hard to get. Effy walks away and Katie turns her attention to Emily to get her anger at the interaction out of her system. "Stop fucking following me, would you?" Emily tries to protest, but Katie's already gone.

Thomas has noticed the situation and engages Emily. "THOMAS: A strange place, this college. EMILY: Sorry? THOMAS: Everyone is loud and they care about nothing. EMILY: Yeah. You're right. THOMAS: You are the same as your sister. EMILY: I'm not the same as her. THOMAS: No? Maybe you're a little more pretty. EMILY: Cheeky." Thomas is giving Emily an opportunity to take her power back, whether he means to or not. He's letting her say, "I'm not like my sister", and it seems like it might be the first time she's ever actually said that out loud to someone. Maybe because Thomas is new, or the janitor, she feels like it's safe to say that to him. He tells her that she's the more attractive one, and that's definitely something Emily hasn't heard before. She looks reluctantly pleased and it's adorable.

- Emily walks away, and Thomas pronounces her backside as being "most satisfactory". I like this because at times Thomas can seem a little too honorable. This gives us a little reminder that he's still a teenage guy. He turns his attention back to the hallway only to realize that it's a complete mess again. And then he hears Africanish music and abandons his job to follow the noise. It's a dance class where they're "acting Africa" and "stalking leopards". Naturally, Pandora is in it, being an adorable... gazelle? Maybe? It's hard to tell what she's supposed to be, but she's really into it, and Thomas is charmed. Pandora keeps dancing even after they're supposed to be done, in typical Pandora form.

Thomas goes over to the drums and looks at the instruments. He's comforted. "Hello, friend," he says as he begins to play. This is the first time this episode where Thomas allows himself to let down his cheery exterior, to really feel homesick. Pandora sneaks back into the room to see him under the guise of forgetting her tail. She complements him on his "fast fingers" and then says, "Thomas? Why are you crying?" And I love this because 1) Pandora remembers his name, even though she was so drunk she was puking when they met, 2) Pandora recognizes him, even though Effy didn't, and 3) she's not beating around the bush. She sees he's upset and she doesn't want to be polite and pretend like she doesn't notice. She just wants to help. It's a really lovely scene, Pandora, an English girl, dressed up like Thomas' homeland, reaching out and trying to make him comfortable in his new home.

- Pandora takes Thomas to her Aunt Elizabeth's house, and fuck is that exterior shot gorgeous. They have a nice little conversation as they walk up to the house, "PANDORA: Effy told me you carried me back, stripped me naked, and laid me tenderly in your bed. THOMAS: Excuse me? I didn't... What? PANDORA: You must be wondrously strong to carry me. THOMAS: I've carried heavier goats. PANDORA: You're funny! THOMAS: Am I? PANDORA: Yeah. And you like all the same things as me. Dancing, doughnuts..." I love this conversation. First of all, Effy, you sly dog, you laid the groundwork for this ship! But also, I like that they're showing us Pandora and Thomas getting to know each other, finding the things they have in common. They're showing us why this relationship works, and in the thirty seconds that this scene is, I'm completely sold on the idea that they should be together. Their outfits are great, too. Pandora is all pastels and polka dots and Thomas has more muted tones and stripes. They both look a bit ridiculous. They're not matching, but they're complementary, and I think it's such a nice reflection of their relationship, two people who are the same naive, optimistic, slightly bizarre type of person. Thomas asks how many people live in Aunt Elizabeth's place, and Pandora says, "one! Auntie Lizzie has a wicked load of stuff." And again, as in Effy's house, the point is underlined- this is not a world Thomas grew up in.

Auntie Elizabeth has a set of chainsaws displayed on her wall, as well as an umbrella stand filled with canes. She does indeed have a wicked load of stuff. Elizabeth gives them tea, and it turns out to be made from pot. Thomas realizes that he has an opportunity here, and says "I would be very pleased to see how it's grown". Aunt Elizabeth says that they can go once they've gotten "well and truly sconed" and I'm not sure if she knows the tea is weed or not. Thomas says, "maybe I could sell some. I think people would like it very much!" Aunt Elizabeth tells Pandora that she could do much worse and gives Thomas as much weed as he wants. They go back to Thomas' place, and Pandora says, "You don't have much furniture in here, do you, Thomas?" Thomas replies by talking about his mother again: "I must buy some before my mother comes. She is a powerful lady, most powerful. Especially on the backhand." Pandora goes on a little rant about how there's hardly enough tea in the bag for three or four cups, and that's definitely not enough to buy a sofa, and looks horrified when Thomas puts the "tea" in a joint and goes to smoke it. Finally, Pandora understands. "You're amazing!" she says, and she kisses him in this really squishy, adorable, totally Pandora way. "Wow, now I get it. That was kissing." They're such a great ship and the writers really messed up in series 4.

- Meanwhile, at the Stonem house, Effy is having a silent staredown with her mum while her dad prattles on about a fight Steve got in with the Managing Director of their company the background. She has wine with her dinner, which I guess explains some things about where her parents are when it comes to her. "You liked him, didn't you, love?" Jim asks Anthea. Effy smiles a knowing smile while Anthea tries to get out of this conversation, but apparently Jim has invited Steve over for drinks because they have a lot in common. That you do, Jim, more than you know. "I've made a friend!" Jim says, and it's a bit heartbreaking because he seems so excited that he's got a friend. The door rings, and Jim says, "that'll be him now" and goes to answer it. Anthea and Effy get a moment to themselves. "It's more complicated than you think," Anthea tries, but Effy is angry. "It doesn't seem complicated. You're fucking my dad's line manager. No biggie." Pandora shows up, and Jim asks her her name again. When she answers, he mutters "ridiculous" under his breath, and I love it. Anthea is trying to hide her face so Thomas doesn't recognize her, but to no avail. He goes up to Jim and says, "So glad to meet you again! You look different with your clothes on!" I think that's pushing the limit of what's believable, but maybe to Thomas all white men look the same.

- Cook, JJ, and Freddie are standing in a parking lot. JJ tries to voice that he's still upset with Cook, but Cook is way beyond that. Cook ogles the girls, and Freddie informs him that they all hate him because he's a tit. Pandora and Effy explain the situation, and it becomes clear that Effy has gathered the troops here to help Thomas out. At the mention of Johnny White, Freddie looks like he's about to back out, but at the mention of 13 ounces of weed, he's convinced of staying. Then Naomi appears. "Hi!" she says, and gives a little wave. She's happy to be included. But then right away, Katie is on the offensive, making gay jokes about Naomi, and Naomi turns right back around to leave. "See you". This is Naomi putting herself out there, and she immediately rejected and othered by this group. She so badly wants to be like everyone else, to be included even though she wants everyone to think she doesn't care, and in just a few seconds of being there all of her suspicions are confirmed. She doesn't fit in, these people don't like her, they're not going to accept her... and that's the final straw for Emily. It's one thing to follow along with what Katie wants when she's the only person getting hurt, but this is Naomi, the love of her life, and Emily isn't going to stand for it. She can't let Naomi feel hurt and left out, and she needs to fix it right then and there. "Oh, for fuck’s sake! She didn’t kiss me, OK?...I kissed her. I was drunk and someone gave me MDMA and … I felt like fucking kissing someone. Satisfied?" Finally the viewer gets confirmation of what we've suspected since the first episode- the relationship between Naomi and Emily is not nearly as simple as Naomi being some sort of predator.

Effy gives this little smile. She's proud of Emily for finally standing up to Katie, and she's been on this Naomily ship from the first time she saw the two of them in a room together, so I think she's very satisfied with the way this is progressing, thank you very much. Then Effy looks over her shoulder, because of course Naomi is about to come back. Emily has stood up for her, acknowledged in a small way that she likes Naomi as something. Anything more than this would drive Naomi away and make Katie angry, but this? This is just toeing the line, and Emily gets what she wants. Then Cook makes a gross comment about Naomi and Emily kissing, and Effy immediately shuts him down, "you promised us a party?" And I love this, too, because she's protecting them. Naomi and Emily aren't ready to talk further about their feelings and she knows that, so she distracts Cook. Effy seems on the surface like she doesn't care about anyone or anything, but really, she's someone that wants to protect everyone around her as much as she can.

- Cook moves a manhole and reveals a gold light to rival the briefcase in Pulp Fiction. It looks like they're in some sort of cave, and everyone goes to sell Thomas' weed. But wait! Johnny White is here, and things are going to get messy. But first, we have some more Naomily to attend to while Johnny White gets trampled by some pilled-up party kids. "how much have you sold?" Emily asks Naomi, "I've done three bags." Naomi looks scared and also like there's nowhere she'd rather be, and like she doesn't really know how to reconcile the two. Naomi puts up her wall, "I don't even know why I'm doing this" as if the reason ("I'm doing this to spend time with you") isn't perfectly obvious to them both. Effy appears to lurk in a corner and watch her favorite ship progress. Naomi says, "I don't care what your sister thinks," but she does, she totally does, because what Katie thinks is important to Emily and Emily is important to her. Naomi is standing sideways this entire conversation, not even looking directly at Emily. Her body language is totally closed off. Emily says, "Yeah, well, I do. So thanks anyway."

The she takes a chance, not quite knowing how it will land. She's been good about not pushing Naomi too far up until now, but now she's put herself out there for Naomi, and I think she's wondering if maybe Naomi will do the same. "I didn't take MDMA that night. I just wanted to kiss you. I want to kiss you now." Naomi accuses Emily of being gay, and Emily apologises. She knows that's too much for Naomi, that she's pushed her too far. There's so much tension in this scene, both of them wanting but not knowing how to express their feelings in a way that's safe. Naomi is too scared of what will happen if she says yes, if she admits that this is what she wants. She knows it's something that could make or destroy her entire life. So she runs away. "Yeah, me too" is her response to Emily's apology, and on the one hand it seems like a "I'm sorry I can't be what you want" but I think it's really a "I'm sorry I'm not brave enough for this right now." Emily being gay makes her life a lot more complicated, because now the potential for something to happen is real. "Shit shit shit" Emily says, because she knows that she's pushed Naomi too far and maybe ruined her chance of something ever happening. Emily turns around and there's Effy, who gives her a smirk and shakes her head a bit.

- Thomas enters the scene and hastily asks, "which are you?" to which Emily responds "gay! I mean, Emily." I think this is the first time she's said that out loud and again, Thomas is the one giving her the opportunity to distance her identity from her sister's. He finds it important to know which one she is instead of treating them as interchangeable. He gives her the opportunity to say who she is. And in response, he's the first person she trusts when she comes out, even if it's accidental. Later, he’ll be the person she goes to when everything is fucked up with Naomi, but we’re not there yet.

Then Johnny White pops up out of nowhere, and he's like "you're on my turf, we're going to beat you up" and Thomas runs, taking this opportunity to show off his rap skills. Pandora is very impressed and blows him a kiss. She's lame and it's perfect. Johnny for whatever reason doesn't recognize Thomas now that he's wearing a hat, and leaves, so Thomas is safe for now. They leave the party and count the money. Effy seems pleased that she's made this happen. - Johnny White shows back up and threatens Thomas before he notices Cook. He rips his necklace off of Cook's throat, but before things can get worse, Thomas steps in. Cook helped him out tonight, so I think he feels like it's the right thing to do to protect Cook (which is why it's so upsetting when Cook betrays him by sleeping with Pandora later). They're friends now, and friends protect friends, at least in Thomas' mind. So he says, "You must be some kind of English pussy cunt. You heard me. I think you're afraid. Possibly your father was a homosexual donkey. I will fight you by myself. You can choose any weapon." Johnny challenges him to a spicy pepper eating competition.

Everyone looks very solemn, and Effy is making this face like, "how on earth did we get into this situation?" She also looks nothing like herself in these scenes. Johnny says that his men will rape all the women if Thomas loses, and Bennie is all, "Um, boss, the lads... The lads aren't too keen, you know, on the rape." And Johnny is like, "I'm talking dangerous! Can't anyone talk dangerous anymore? FFS." And it pulls this contest back into the realm of reality again, so it ends up sort of working.

The shot of the peppers is really lovely and so, so Skins. Effy looks almost embarrassed to be here. Thomas takes a handful of them and Bennie seems genuinely worried for him, but Thomas is perfectly fine. He smiles- it turns out this is his special skill from the village. Everyone is tentatively proud of him, and he even gets a "well done, Thomas" from Effy. Apparently his mother would forbid him from eating them, but he was a very naughty boy and has built up something of an immunity. Now Thomas knows he's in a position to bargain- "If I win, I pay you no money, and you leave me and my friends alone forever." Johnny White predictably gets very fucked up from eating the same amount of peppers Thomas did, so Thomas wins. The gang is very amused.

- Thomas has finally gotten that couch he wanted earlier in the episode, and the gang is celebrating with booze and weed (and donuts for Thomas). Thomas also has a mobile phone now, so he no longer has to rely on those phone cards he was buying at the beginning. Pandora demands he come to bed with her, saying that she wants him to be her first. She says "what do I want? Surfing and turfing. When do I want it? Now" and it's adorable because she's clearly trying hard to be sexy but doesn't quite know how.

Before Thomas can get down to it, though, the doorbell rings, and finally, after hearing so much about him, his mother arrives with a big smile. Maybe she's not as strict as we thought? Thomas' siblings run in to hug him. They clearly adore him and missed him. "Let's see the flat," she says, and he responds with, "but I thought you weren't coming until next week!" She demands a kiss and then says, "it's too long for you to be without supervision" and smiles like she's made a great joke. Her honorable, up before sunrise to milk the goats son would never get up to anything irresponsible. But just as she says that, Katie walks by with a bottle of rum, Effy and Cook are passionately making out (it's worth noting that Freddie is not participating in the party, instead sitting exasperatedly on the couch), and Pandora comes to ask him when he's going to come jump her, because she's taken her bra off and everything... before realizing that there's a woman at the door, and she should be trying to impress her.

Thomas' mother says that she's sending him home and that all of the Skins gang is disgusting. We see one single tear roll down Thomas' cheek, and then he's packed his bags to go back to Congo. Pandora sits in her Aunt Elizabeth's house, her head in Elizabeth's lap next to a giant chainsaw. It's interesting that she goes to Elizabeth instead of her mother- we'll learn in the next episode why that is. Sidenote: we see Aunt Elizabeth smoking a joint in this scene, so it seems like she did know what the “tea” was all along. Last thought: Effy seems OOC in the latter half of this episode. Less in control, less fit and mysterious. But she has just found out that her mum is having an affair and they've just gotten in a fight about it, so I think she's taking more drugs than usual. Which explains why her face is a little more expressive than usual.

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holylulusworld · 6 years ago

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The love of his life – How I fell in love with you

Request: Divorced Jensen x Reader (26 years) when she's virgin and he's her first and he's so so in love with her more than with her past Danneel and ask her to marry him during filming spn and after a year she gave birth of a boy Called jarsen because she's best friend with jared and gen love her like a sister? 2 parts maybe and Smutty, angsty (ex wife bitch) fluffy? Pls I really love, appreciate and support your work

Please consider this is a fanfic. I don’t accept any hate toward the wives of the SPN cast. I support and love them all! If you are a hater, play somewhere else kiddo!

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: fluff, age gap (reader is 26; Jensen 40), nervous Jensen/reader, a date

The love of his life Masterlist

One last look, only one last look. God, you’re beyond nervous. Why did you agree to go out with him? He’s so out of your league. Dammit!

Well, the dress ain’t that bad. The light make-up and your hair look great. Still, you know you’re not the kind of girl he’s usually dating.

What if he wants more? What if he’s the kind of guy thinking a girl should let him have her after one date?

Jensen didn’t seem that kind of guy. He’s nice…smart…and he really listened to the things you had to say.

----

When you hear a soft knock at your door you try to calm your nerves down. He’s here…

“Whoa…you look beautiful,” is the first thing he says and you blush furiously.

“Well…thank you,” you stammer nervously.

Offering his arm Jensen leads you out of your apartment complex. Opening the door to the passenger seat for you he can’t stop smiling. His heart beats a mile in a minute next to you.

Driving in silence he gives you side-glances and you smile. When your eyes meet his he flushes red.

“So you like the restaurant?”

“Yeah. Maybe I’m not objective. The owner is the father of a friend of mine and I worked there for a while until I finally got a job as a writer.”

“Friend? Like ex-boyfriend?” Jensen mutters.

“No, just a friend. Like you and Jared. I never had a boyfriend before…” You admit.

“Uh…wait…Never? Like never…never?”

Flushing red you realize what you just admitted to an almost complete stranger.

“I…uh…”

“Wow! I mean you’re beautiful and smart. I thought the guys would run after you day and night.”

“What? Not really. There were a few guys hitting on me but they were so…rude.”

“Rude?”

“Like… ‘oh baby you look great and all, but do you know what really looks good on you? Me’.”

“A guy said that? Really?”

“Yes, then he tried to grab my ass! My fist collided with his jaw and that was that.”

“All guys were like that?”

“I had a few dates with a guy. He seemed to be nice. After the third date, he expected that I have sex with him. That guy told me he bought me dinner so I owe it to him. That ass bought a burrito and I paid his and mine not the other way around.”

“That’s…I have no words. I’m out of business for a while but I can’t believe guys act like a caveman.”

“The reason I agreed to go out with you was that you’re the first guy…you didn’t try to... You were nice, not intrusive. I liked you.”

“I like you too.” Jensen rasps and you smile.

-----

“So this is your friend?” Alfredo asks and you nod.

“Alfredo this is Jensen,” you say smiling.

“Lei é bella (she is pretty), isn’t she? Treat her good. She never brings a man to the restaurant, except she likes him,” Alfredo says and you blush.

“I see.”

“To be correct she never brought someone here before young man. She really must like you. Our bel fiore (pretty flower) is very shy and very precious. Don’t hurt her young man.”

“I know she’s precious. I swear I will never hurt her, Alfredo.” Jensen says.

Blushing even more (if that’s possible) you look into gorgeous emerald eyes. Stroking your hand gently Jensen’s hand is slightly shaking.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure, Y/N. Go ahead.”

“The divorce was hard, right? I saw the pictures of you…you looked so sad. She really hurt you.”

“I knew her for so long. I thought I can trust her, that I know her inside out but I was wrong. She had an affair and I didn’t see it, Y/N. It felt like someone just ripped my heart out.” Jensen admits.

Out of instinct, you jump up to hug Jensen tight. Kissing his forehead you gently stroke his back. A low moan leaves his lips and you realize what you just did.

“Sorry…sometimes I’m a bit…I…”

“Don’t be sorry. Thank you. Everyone else told me to be strong or get over it. How can you get over such a betrayal? I loved her and she just tossed me away. Now I’m finally able to move on and she calls me. Telling me how sorry she is.”

“Oh…you want to go back to her?” You ask sadly.

“No, never. We are over. The divorce was the best thing could happen to me,” Jensen rasps.

“Why?”

“Cause I met you. I would’ve never met you without the divorce.”

“You are really charming, aren’t you?”

“Hmmm…it’s the truth, Y/N. I feel so good with you. I haven’t felt that good in years. Honestly, I never felt that good ever before. Not even with her.”

“I…oh…that’s…”

“I think I love you, Y/N. I know it’s crazy we don’t know each other. We barely talked but I’m head over heels for you. I already told Jared so…” He says. (Hiding the fact he told Jared he’s going to marry you).

“I like being with you, Jensen. I never felt so comfortable with another man before.”

“Does that mean we can meet again?”

“I’d like that.”

----

Walking you to your apartment Jensen holds your hand. When it’s time to part ways he sighs. Not wanting to let you go he just stares down at you.

His hand gently cups your face before he kisses you softly. Arms wrapping around his neck you stand on tiptoes to kiss him back.

“We definitely will go out again,” you gasp.

“How about I show you the set tomorrow? We could have dinner later.” Jensen asks hopefully.

“Tomorrow? Sounds great. I can’t wait to see you again, Jensen.”

“I can’t wait either…”

Forever Tags

@donnaintx, @screechingartisancashbailiff, @fallen-wolf22 , @curly-haired-disaster-deactivat, @sister-winchesters99, @mogaruke, @the-is13, @helloitsmeamie203, @strayrosesbloom , @thewinchesterco, @hobby27, @kittycatlover18, @gh0stgurl, @marvelfansworld , @sandlee44, @hawaiianohana15, @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt, @katpatrova17, @notyourtypicalrose , @onethingthatkeepsmealive, @natura1phenomenon, @flamencodiva, @echoesofpassion, @cocklesbelli, @anushay1998, @voltage-my2dlove, @wayward-gabriel

Dean/Jensen Forever Tags

@spnfamily-thewinchesters, @love-my-not-natural-babies, @supernatural-bellawinchester, @butifulsoul125, @lyinginthegingerlocks, @mirandaaustin93, @hawaiianohana15, @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester, @20gayneen, @x2closebut2farx, @janicho88, @thefaithfulwriter, @dreaminemz, @negans-lucille-tblr

#SPN #spn fanfic #spn tag #Jensen Ackles #jensen x reader #the love of his life masterlist #fluff #request fill

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squirrel-moose-winchester · 6 years ago

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Two Wrongs Make a Right

Titles: Two Wrongs Make a Right

Pairing: Demon!Dean x Demon!Reader

Word Count: 4008

Summary: With Dean as a demon, he happens to have a bunch of run-in’s with Y/N, whom he called a “demon bitch.” With his uncaring personality, he finds a thrill in trying to get her in bed. To get her to swallow her pride and beg for… all of him.

Warnings: All the SMUT, Explicit Language, Rough!Dean, Oral (Female Receiving), Sexual Tension, and… that’s all I can think of.

A/N: This is my entry for @ain-t-bovvered and @waywardbaby’s Followers 666 Challenge!! The Sin that I chose was Pride and the prompt I saw fit was #37: “I’m sorry, I cant understand what you are saying because I don’t speak little bitch,” which will be italicized and in bold :) I was surprised at how much I enjoyed writing demon!Reader and demon!Dean. I felt like it gave me the freedom to be the ruthless bitch I could be but chose not to. LOL. I hope you guys like it!!

Also, I am still debating in turning this into my first series ever!! So please tell me what you think about it and if I should continue the story!! Thank you!!

Disclaimer: Not my gif.

“That’s it. I can’t deal with you two bickering morons right now,” Crowley muttered before vanishing off to who knows where.

You rolled your eyes as the King of Hell left you with your current arch nemesis, Dean Winchester. The arrogant bastard thought he had the right to boss you around and tell you what to do. Was it your job to wait on his every need like a little bitch? Hell no. You don’t take orders from no one, and you weren’t about to start just because the infamous Dean Winchester now had black eyes. He could be standing on a giant ball with one foot, juggling bowling pins caught on fire, with a monkey dancing on his head, and you still wouldn’t give a rat’s ass about the man. He was infuriating.

“So what do we do now?” He asked, that smug smirk plastered on his mouth. How you wish you could just slice it right off.

“I could always skin you alive, starting with your toes all the way to that pretty little face of yours?” You suggested.

“Oh sweetheart, I love it you get all riled up.”

“Fuck you,” you hissed.

“I also love it when you talk dirty to me,” Dean countered quickly. He was always a witty one.

You scoffed, rolling your eyes at the once righteous hunter. “Why are you even here again?”

“Why are you?” He answered your question with another question, one of the few quirks you loathed about him. He knew how much that ticked you off, so it always brought him great pleasure to get the chance to do it.

“I was here first,” you snapped.

“Well, I’m staying because we’re practically best friends,” the sarcasm oozing from every syllable.

How he managed to piss you off so hard was beyond you, but you had had enough of him. “Get out. Leave,” you demanded.

“Now why would I do that? I like the company here.”

“Fine. I’m a little bored of this place anyways. You have fun,” you faked a smile before storming out. Dean watched your hips sway all the way out the door before he got out of his own seat to follow. If Dean was something as a demon, it was persistent, especially when it came to you. He was going to get you to swallow your pride one way or another and get you to beg for him. Beg for his cock. Beg for him to make you feel unbelievable full, aching, and satisfied.

You were walking down the dark streets, unfazed by the creeps lurking around. You were a demon; you could easily kill any loser that rubbed you the wrong way. There was no longer anything to be afraid of. Even if they hurt you, you were already dead.

“Hey there gorgeous, want to have some fun?” A large drunk man walked up to you, his half-lidded eyes undressing you.

“If by fun, you mean me cutting off your dick and shoving it down your throat so you choke and die on it, then yeah. Let’s get this party started,” you smirked, your eyes flashing completely black.

The man seemed to sobered up quickly, stumbling backwards before bolting in the other direction. You chuckled at how pathetic he was before continuing back to your motel room. Dean watched from afar, enjoying your warm and enchanting personality. It made him wonder what type of person you were when you were alive.

According to Crowley, you had sold your soul back in the 1920’s to save your husband. 10 years later your debt had to be repaid, but a few hours before you were to be mauled by hell hounds, you had found out about your husband’s secret affairs that’s been happening ever since you bought him back to life. So, you made another deal, Crowley being the one to seal it. You wanted revenge and asked to be returned to your body as a demon so you could kill him with your bare hands, with the face your husband had come to know. He was going to pay for what he did. Crowley on the other hand was more than happy to oblige. He’d get two souls for it. Yours and his. They only catch was that you had to work for him, and if that was the small cost you had to pay for your revenge, then so be it, and the deal was sealed with a kiss.

Just as you entered the motel room, you sighed heavily with annoyance. “What the hell are you doing here?” You growled.

“Thought you’d might like some company,” Dean cooed.

“Not by the likes of you… ever.”

“Oh c’mon. Stop denying the fact that you want me,” Dean stepped into the light, his signature smirk playing on his unworldly pink lips.

“As if. Now get the hell out.”

“Only if you ask nicely,” he grinned, taking a step closer. Right when you were about to open your mouth, Dean was suddenly standing before you, his chest pressed against yours. You didn’t react, simply scowling at him, killing him a millions times over in your head. “Oh, Sweetheart, we both know you want me.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t understand what you’re saying because I don’t speak little bitch,” you retorted.

In a flash, Dean on you. His arms securely trapping you flush against his body, mouth harshly attached to yours, and hands roughly squeezing your ass. You couldn’t help the moan slipping passed your lips as Dean ravished you. It was unexpected and did nothing to help alleviate the sexual tension you had for the man.

You hated him, that was for sure, but at the same time you craved him, which was why you hated him all the more. You were in control of yourself, and you weren’t about to let some cocky demon Winchester tear all that apart, no matter how tempting he was, but now it was too late.

Attempting to keep your façade up, you broke the kiss, yanking your bottom lip from between his teeth, then struggling to escape his grasp, but it was futile. Somehow, despite the years in difference, he was still stronger than you. While you fought for release, Dean latched his lips to your neck, sucking, nibbling, and licking, leaving dark marks everywhere.

“Your mine,” he growled against your skin, his words hitting you hard in your core.

“In your dreams,” you gasped as he bit down hard at the junction where your neck met your shoulder, breaking the skin. Dean licked up the blood, loving the way the metallic liquid tasted.

“Haven’t you ever heard that sometimes dreams do come true,” he whispered in your ear, his hands squeezing your bum once again, this time hard enough to elicit a yelp from you.

Dean took that as his opportunity to connect his lips to yours again, his tongue sneaking in to taste every inch of you. When you didn’t comply, he quickly and recklessly backed you up against the wall, thoroughly trapping you.

With you now more secured, he let his hands travel up your hips, slipping passed the fabric and over your bare skin, fingers leaving a tingling sensation as he caressed your naked torso. His hands quickly found your chest, releasing a loud groan of approval when he realized that all this time you were braless. He could have reached over to you any time he wanted and feel your hardening nipples in his large palm through the thin cloth you wore.

“Son of a bitch,” you managed to say when you pulled your lips away from him, needing to catch your breath.

“Fucking tease, you know that?” Dean’s breathing was just as labored as yours. “You always walk around without a bra?”

“No panties either,” you revealed, a smug grin on your lips.

“Such a bad girl,” Dean snarled, both of his hands now covering your twin mounds. A loud yelp echoed through the room as he squeezed your breasts hard, your nipples caught between his fingers as he pinched them.

The back of your head hit the wall at the sudden pleasure. That was one thing you had realized when you became a demon all those centuries ago, your senses, when it came to sex, was a lot more sensitive; a lot more intense, but the way Dean touched you drove you over the top, but you’d never admit that. You would never give him the satisfaction.

“Tell me something I don’t know,” you replied, shoving him away from you with all your might. Dean stumbled back, his eyes black and brows furrowed in disappointment. “Keep your hands to yourself, Sweetheart,” you mocked, straightening yourself.

Dean growled, stalking back towards you, his body language sending off a few alarms in your head, but you weren’t going to back down. “Your mine, now submit,” he barked.

“Oh, ho, ho,” you chuckled with purpose, “I don’t belong to no one. I don’t anybody, especially you,” you spat, poking at his firm chest.

“That’s what you think.”

“Really? What makes you believe that I’m yours?” You inquired, crossing your arms over your chest, and shifting all your weight onto one side of your body, sticking the opposite hip out.

“Because I said so,” Dean stated, his voice so low you could barely understand what he was saying due to the vibrations.

Once again, as you were about to say something, Dean had stolen your attention. He had propelled you onto the bed, your tiny figure bouncing unflatteringly on the mattress. By the time your steadied yourself, Dean was already on top of you, literally ripping your shirt in half.

You gasped at his wildness. “You dick, this was new,” you muttered.

“Does it look like I give a shit,” he countered, “now shut up.” His lips were back on yours while his hands worked on removing the rest of your clothing. Dean had had enough of your playing hard to get and he was now going to take what he believed was his. You.

Through your struggle, Dean had yet to hear you say “no,” but it never came. Dean had you bare beneath him, taking hold of both your wrists and pinning them about your head with one hand as he pressed his body between your legs. With his free hand, he grabbed onto one of your legs, prying them open to reveal your soaked cunt to him; all wet and ready.

Dean kissed your swollen lips hard one last time before licking and sucking his way down to your pussy, leaving dark marks as he went. Hovering over your sopping cunt, you could feel the heat of his breath, the heaviness of his breathing. You could tell that he was trying to control himself, and you weren’t any better. He could see your chest heaving erratically. The little things that you were doing didn’t get passed him, for example, the way your fist clenched the sheets, the subtle quiver of your legs in anticipation. He knew what you wanted, but he was going to make you beg.

“So wet,” he commented, making you bite you bottom lip. “What do you want?” The question alone implied his intentions, but you didn’t speak. You couldn’t speak. If you did, only a loud moan would come out. You desperately wanted him, needed him, but you were prideful. You didn’t need a man. You didn’t need him.

When Dean got no response, he delicately blew on your clit, the sudden cool air causing your body to jolt a bit. “Shit,” you finally spewed, squirming in his grasp. You hadn’t expected the sudden act.

“C’mon Y/N, tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you. Submit.”

“Screw you,” you gritted.

“That’s the plan,” Dean replied, chuckling.

As if on perfect timing, just as your lips parted to speak, Dean quickly sucked on your clit, letting it pop out of his mouth in one swift motion. You moaned loudly, your entire body arching from the surprising pleasure, and your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

“Atta girl,” Dean teased, capturing the sensitive nub in his mouth, keeping your wrists still pinned above your head, and throwing your leg over his shoulder so he could taste you better. “Tastes better than any pussy I’ve had,” Dean confessed, “need to taste more.”

Dean finally released your wrist, but before you could try and push him away, his hot slippery tongue plunged inside of your sweet hole, tasting more of you. With a loud yelp, your hands flew into his hair, pulling and pushing his head closer to your aching heat. He was so good with his tongue that you couldn’t help but want more. Your body reacted on it’s own, as if Dean was controlling you, and perhaps he was.

He didn’t relent, continuing to expertly devour your pussy. At this point your eyes were shut and rolled back, your spine arched like a perfect bridge, and your thighs began to shake violently as Dean held them a part from crushing his head.

You were so close, so damn close and Dean knew it. Dean read all the signs of your impending release, and pulled his lips away right before you could let go. “Fucking hell!” You screamed when he detached his lips from your pussy lips. Glancing down, you saw Dean smirking at you, his lips, chin, and the tip of his nose wet with your juices.

“Tell me what you want.”

Your hands were gripping on to Dean’s hair, right at the roots for dear life. You needed to find your release. That son of a bitch pulled away on purpose. He knew very well what he was doing to you, but your stubbornness and your pride was getting of the way of probably the best orgasm you’ve ever received simply by mouth.

Feeling the loosening of your grip on his light brown locks, he knew you were finally calming down, which was his cue to near you to the edge once again, so he swiped his tongue along your entrance before assaulting your clit. This time around, Dean held nothing back, the coil in your stomach tightening quickly.

“Dean!” You shouted his name, your entire upper half lifting off of the bed, now sitting up, and your legs quivering in pursuit to shut tight, but Dean held you down fast. Despite you tugging on his hair, Dean continued his ministrations, edging further and further to fulfillment. “Please,” the words finally slipped passed your lips, as your whole body trembled with arousal.

You watched as his lips connected with your pussy, watched how he ate you out like a starved animal. As much as you denied it, he was gorgeous, especially with his head between your legs. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you neared your tipping point.

“Please. Please, please, please!” The word fell from your lips repeatedly, needing to find your release.

“That’s right. Beg for it,” Dean mumbled against your core, the vibrations only adding more to the pleasure.

“Fuck! Please, Dean. I need to come,” you begged.

That was what Dean was waiting for. That was all he needed and he demolished your cunt. Sucking, licking, biting, growling, the whole nine, and in a matter of seconds, you were coming undone. You screamed through your release, hunched over Dean’s head, pulling on his hair while your legs shook.

When you finally calmed down, you threw yourself backwards, sighing in delight. Dean propped himself on his knees, taking in every aspect of you. There were tear stains on your crimson cheeks and tears still rolling down the side of your eyes. Dean smiled knowing those were tears of the best orgasm ever, but now, he needed to be inside of you, and he knew just the way to get your approval.

Leaving you to recuperate, knowing you were going to need it, he rid himself of his clothing. He was completely bare when you finally managed opened your eyes, immediately being drawn directly to Dean’s massive cock. You might have been a demon, but you knew it was going to hurt. You had never had anyone remotely close to being his size. He was long and extremely thick. Yum.

Dean wasted no time in proceeding with his plan. He already got you to beg for release, now he was going to make you beg for his cock like the good little cock slut you were meant to be. His good little girl.

Positioning the head of his shaft at your opening, he poked at you teasingly. The anticipation had your heart thumping against your ribcage to the point that was all you could hear. Your cunt was drooling with hunger, wanting, needing him inside of you. You were yearning for the burning stretch of his huge cock slipping into your tight little pussy.

“You gonna finally tell me what you want, Y/N?” Dean smirked down at you, knowing he had you going crazy for him.

You stared daggers at him, eyes squinted with infuriation, however, he was right. He had you right where he wanted you, and right where you never wanted to be… at the mercy of some arrogant, cocky, self-centered, womanizer of a man. You’d be a fool to let this happen to you a second time. Just because you were a demon, didn’t mean you had no feelings. That blasted man had somehow wriggled his way into your darkened heart, and as much as you tried to keep those feelings locked up, each day proved to be most difficult.

It was your wit and your determination… no, it was your pride that kept you from entirely falling for him, plus the grudge you’ve kept against them. Dean Winchester and his brother had tried to kill you on many occasions, so why were you so riled up by a man that, once upon a time, wanted you dead? Damn you Winchester!

“Well?” Dean interrupted your thoughts, stimulating a long and languid moan to fall from your lips as he pushed barely the tip into you. “Tell me what you want,” his words came out demanding, rather than playful. It was obvious now that he needed you just as much as you needed him, but it was his pride as well, wanting you to submit completely to him.

Dean shoved the top of his length into you again, this time leaving it in, allowing you to appreciate how amazing it was going to feel with him fully sheathed inside you. He watched your expression, loving the way your eyes rolled to the back of your head, back arched, allowing his eyes to drink in how perfect you were. Allowing him and his thoughts to deliberate how much he wanted to torture you with utter bliss that your body falls apart. He wanted to wreck you with his body, wreck you with his cock. He was going to make you his little sex whore if it was the last thing he did.

“Fuck, please!” There is was. You were finally crumbling beneath him, absolutely submitted to him. Little miss badass demon was finally going to beg for him. Beg for his cock.

“Sorry Sweetheart, I didn’t hear you,” Dean chuckled menacingly.

“I need it. I need you!”

“Need me to what?” He whispered in her ear after leaning over her writhing form.

Your arms wrapped themselves around his neck, bringing him closer, just as your legs did by wrapping around his waist, attempting to pull him into you. “I need your cock. I need you to fuck me, please!” You were a begging mess, your mind now blanketed with nothing but the cravings you’ve resisted all this time.

You screamed as Dean buried himself inside of you. He pushed harder and harder, forcing you to fit all of him. The pain was immeasurable, but it only heightened your arousal. You wanted him to take control. You wanted him to do as he pleased with your body. You wanted him to dominate you in every way possible. Dean was a beast and you wanted to be his victim.

He started to pound into you, drawing non-stop pleas of pleasure from your lips. His name fell from your perfect lips like a mantra for the gods, except Dean was your god. He felt you tightening around him, reaching your peak surprisingly quick, but this time Dean wasn’t going to deny you of it. He wanted to feel you strangle his dick with your tight cunt.

With every powerful and bruising thrust, Dean sent you over the edge, your body convulsing violently as the, by far, best orgasm set fire through every nerve endings. Dean moaned with pure satisfaction when liquid came flying everywhere, forcing his cock from you.

“Damn baby, you just squirted. That’s fucking sexy,” he cooed. “Let’s see how much more you can give me, Sweetheart.”

Without allowing you to calm down, Dean was already thrusting back into you with a new found drive and goal. He was going to fuck you soaking wet!

You cried out as the sensation zapped through you, the coil building up in your abdomen again. “Fuck!” You screamed, the feeling just as overwhelming as the first one, your juices squirting out as Dean pulled out, watching.

Suddenly, Dean scooted downwards, his face at your pussy. You noted the excitement in his eyes, making you wonder what the hell he was up to now, but before you could ask, he stuck two of his rough fingers inside of you, pumping viciously against your g-spot. His lips trapped around our clit, sucking, licking, and biting, drawing strings of profanities from you.

“That’s it baby, squirt in my mouth,” Dean encouraged. Your eyes shut tight as you let go. Dean had his mouth open, drinking all you had to offer before going licking over your slit and sucking on your clit, not wanting to waste the taste of you.

“Holy shit!” You cried, tears streaming down your face again. This was the first time in your history that you’ve ever squirted. It was no surprise that Dean could pull it out of you. This was something new and only added another tether towards the green-eyed Winchester.

“Now it’s my turn to come,” Dean murmured, lining himself back at you entrance, “and I’m going to fill you up really good,” he added.

Dean charged into you, drilling into you and making you scream, begging for him to fill you up. For the umpteenth time, you reached your high along with Dean. He grunted, stuffing you up with his hot seed while your pussy squeezed him of every last drop. When Dean was done, he collapsed on top of you, his breathing labored just as yours were.

Once you were able to catch your breath, you pushed him off of you and hopped out of the bed and into the bathroom where you cleaned yourself up. You took a good look at yourself in the mirror, more color on your face than before and body littered with hickies from that damn Winchester. You couldn’t believe that you let it happen. You couldn’t believe that Dean had managed to get you to beg for him, beg for release, beg him to fill you up with cum, but never again. This was a one-time deal and you were going to make sure of it.

Returning to the main room, you started to slip on your clothing as Dean laid naked under the covers watching you. He didn’t seem surprised that you were leaving, merely observing as you gathered your things.

“So… same time tomorrow?” Dean questioned, that annoying smug grin on his face.

“Go fuck yourself.”

And with that you were out the door, Dean’s smirk never faltering. In fact, he took those words as a challenge, and he never backed down from a challenge.

“Y/N, you’re mine,” he announced to himself, before falling back into the sheets.

Say Something Nice Here!! (Also let me know if I should turn this into a series!)

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