#i need winds so bad im gonna throw up

[ilynpilled]

jaime seeking out the executioner ser ilyn payne immediately after the lancel conversation with real swords this time and taking him into the godswood to escape all eyes and ears and confessing having sex with cersei on the king’s bed at darry and then hunting arya for her thinking “the things i do for love” —which we know is tied to bran— and ending the chapter with “kill me if you can.” [turning into “it pleases him to humiliate me nightly. it might please him even more to kill me. he liked to believe that he was getting better, but the improvement was slow and not without cost. underneath his steel and wool and boiled leather jaime lannister was a tapestry of cuts and scabs and bruises”] THEN the next chapter is the brienne chapter at the quiet isle with septon meribald holding confessional + the discussion about sandor, sin, crime, pity, and mercy. then the juxtaposition of that with the seven pointed star and the high septon’s punitive justice of “without confession there cannot be forgiveness” —> “there can be no penance without pain. no man should spare himself the scourge […] i seldom feel so close to god as when i am being whipped for mine own wickedness” —> “ser osney shall taste [mercy] in the afterlife. in the seven pointed star it is written that all sins may be forgiven, but crimes must still be punished” which is ofc the same thing that ser bonifer said to jaime after their talk of sin/crime and forgiveness/punishment and sending sinners to the block for their crimes despite repentance as he folded his hands before him like a steeple in a way that reminded jaime uncomfortably of his father

[irisintheafterglow]

Hey there!

Saw your requests were open (if it isnt,just ignore this)

But i just love your satoru x reader and co parenting megumi????and i would KILL to see like, something bad happening to reader (like a mission going wrong,she passing out or getting sick or all) and boys just panicking cause satoru loves reader,and megumi sees her as his mother???

Sorry,im a sucker for hurt/comfort trope

Lots of love!!! you're amazing!

aww this is so cute, thank you for the request anon <3 wrote it as sick fic instead of injury since i,,,, have written like 3 things with that trope recently so let's do a fluffy sick fic instead lol. hope you like it :))

cw/tags: established relationship (pet names babe, baby, sweetheart), gn!reader, some explicit language, mention of eating

"the kid thinks you're gonna die," your boyfriend says as he enters your room, setting a grocery bag on your desk and digging around for the bottle of orange juice. "you're starting to worry me too, honestly."

"i'm not gonna die, babe; i think it's just the flu," you groan, propping yourself on an elbow and attempting to sit up. you're unsuccessful, the throbbing in your head and the chills in your arms too overwhelming. you fall back against the pillow with a less-than-ceremonial thump. satoru crouches in front of you, eyebrows drawn and forehead wrinkled in concern. he pulls down his blindfold and you're met with the bright blue eyes you loved so much.

"yep. looks like you're dying soon," he declares with a curt nod and you scoff, a chuckle turning into an aggressive fit of coughing. satoru is lightning-quick, grabbing a new bottle of water and snapping off the cap before holding it up to your lips. "here, drink." you push his hands away, wordlessly insisting that you can drink on your own while still hacking relentlessly. "nuh-uh, just let me help you." with a frown, you let him tilt the bottle toward you and take a few careful sips. "you are frustratingly stubborn," he sighs.

"i have to be if i need to deal with you all the time," you joke hoarsely, sips of water becoming gulps.

"yeah, but you love me for it," he finishes and you agree with a shrug. "easy, there," he warns as you keep downing the water. "don't want you choking again."

"i'm fine, satoru."

"you've been working yourself too much, you know."

"hypocrite," you counter and he frowns, taking a seat on the edge of your bed. you were right, even though he didn't want to admit it. satoru was always the first one to say that someone was working too hard, just to take the burden for himself. it was a red flag, you said a few weeks ago over convenience store sushi; you also noted his 'concerningly inflated ego, lack of spatial awareness, and general disinterest in things that could be momentarily unpleasant.' you'd finished it, though, with a long-winded comment about how his red flags, in all their scarlet glory, made satoru himself. maybe it was just his melodrama, but he'd cut off his hand if it meant you were able to joke like that again.

"i'm serious. i think your body's shutting down because-"

"because i've been away too long, i know. i don't need a lecture right now, satoru." you swallow the last of the water and settle back onto your pillow, grumbling when you feel the side of your bed sink with your boyfriend's weight. "baby, you're gonna get sick, too."

"that means i get to take a day or two off," he points out, fitting his face into the divot between your shoulder and neck. despite your complaints, he throws off the comforter and replaces the blankets with his arms. "don't grrrr me, babe. you need to burn off your fever and i run warmer than any of these sheets."

"aren't i sweaty and stinky and yucky? how can you be touching me when i'm all gross?"

"you mean, how can i love on you right now when you're just being a human?"

"mhmm. you don't find it gross?"

"of course not, sweetheart," he reassures you with a kiss to your shoulder. "i'd be a real dickhead if i only loved you when you were feeling 100%."

"yeah, you're only half a dickhead for other reasons," you murmur into the pillowcase and he laughs, the sound reverberating against your back. before your eyes settle shut, you catch the door of your room opening and vaguely make out a messy head of black hair peeking around the corner. "megs?"

"oi, adults only," the other occupant of the bed threatens, pulling you closer and attempting to flip you to your other side to face him. you unbuckle satoru from around you, though, and manage to sit up. megumi pads carefully into the room, like you'd crumble into sand if his steps were too loud. "come in, i guess," your boyfriend says dramatically with a wave of his hand.

"satoru, i swear-"

"sorry, baby. shutting up." satoru flops back onto your bed and you reach out to megumi, who stares at your hand for a moment before rushing into your arms. "hey, megs. since you're here, you mind grabbing me a soda from the breakroom?"

"i thought you were shutting up, satoru," you remind him, voice poisonously sweet. he echoes your reminder in a mockingly high-pitched voice. "i'm gonna kick you out of my room if you don't stop, mister."

"you wouldn't dare," he gasps.

"oh, i would."

"yeah," he concedes. "you definitely would, but i love you for it." with satoru temporarily placated, you return your attention to the small child in your arms.

"you doing okay, megs?" he nods, eyes shut against your chest and holding you tight. "i'm not gonna die, buddy. i promise." you rub your hand up and down his back, combing your fingers through his hair when you're abruptly swung backward onto the bed. "jeez, satoru, what are you-"

"get the kid, it's nap time," he mumbles with finality, resecuring his body around yours and motioning for megumi to climb in. he does, and you drift off sandwiched between your boys, feeling a little lighter for the first time in days.

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[revehae]

i’m not asking you to write for wonbin but if you ever do js know i wiillllll be there !

yall have finally did it yall have won yall have Cracked me i hope youre happy bc i kinda am… i had this idea before he cut his hair now im feeling like that one harry styles fan tweet and i don’t even stan fr

warnings: drug use, addiction, is this dubcon idk

wc. 670

dealer!wonbin x (f) rich!reader.

wonbin knew you wouldn’t turn down his offer. not in the state that you were in, moody and tense as ever. the girl he’d seen around here and there at parties hadn’t come back around, not since he’d first seen her bump a line or two, and she’d been replaced by you.

what you had become over the months, at least.

not that wonbin would have it any other way. he liked having you kind of dependent on him, knowing he was the first person crossing your mind when you needed a fix. but the brief interactions, meeting you at a party or somewhere shady at night, your car window rolling up as quickly as it had gone down, weren’t enough anymore.

“no.”

“no?” you repeated, like the entitled, spoiled rich girl you really were deep down. wonbin had to give you credit, you cloaked it well, but when you were desperate, you showed your true colors. “what do you mean no?”

wonbin grinned playfully, in a way that he knew would aggravate you. “i mean, i set everything aside for my buddy, and i don’t have enough for you right now.”

you rubbed your nose and ran a finger through your hair, exhaling exasperatedly. “well, tell him to wait. i need it more than he does! is he paying you? i’ll pay you twice as much!”

there you went, offering him your pocket money, throwing it away like it was nothing just for a second of your high. but wonbin didn’t need your money. selling cocaine to recklessly needy addicts like yourself was a very lucrative business.

he shook his head. “sorry, that’s not gonna cut it. but i thought of something better.”

you were in the middle of losing what was left of your mind when wonbin said that and your eyes immediately snapped back to him, fixed to him before he could even get the words completely out.

“i’ll give you two grams if you let me fuck you,” wonbin said casually, a wild grin tugging at his lips. “six grams if you let me do it raw.”

you were a little reluctant at first, but wonbin wasn’t surprised when you finally caved, thinking to himself, that was too damn easy.

because he was nice, wonbin let you snort a line before he touched you, but he was on top of you not a second later. in spite of that, he didn’t move like he was in any particular hurry, snaking a hand up your shirt and pressing his lips against your lips. then your neck, your collarbone, your belly. almost affectionately, almost.

it started to work you up quickly, and you even got annoyed, tugging at his hair, but wonbin didn’t care. matter of fact, he could feel his body getting hotter, burning a thousand degrees. he wanted to savor every second of you, every touch of you, every smell of you.

wonbin really liked the smell of you. the sweet scent helped masked the madness underneath when you were like this. he leaned in to sniff your hair, your neck, your clothes, your hands.

it made his dick twitch in his pants and he couldn’t control himself anymore, yanking it free so that he could steer himself between your open, inviting legs, moaning shakily and blowing his hair out of his eyes as he pushed into you. 

knowing that only a few months ago, your dignity would have never let you consent to something like this, wonbin almost felt bad. he may have sold the drugs, but he never touched them otherwise. too many people he had seen wind up like you, selling themselves out for a moment of ecstasy.

but he wasn’t so different. your cunt squeezed and throttled the life out of his cock. sweat was the reason your body clung to his. you were muttering his name, dragging red lines down his back with your fingernails. and for the time being, there was nothing wonbin wouldn’t do for his moment of ecstasy.

[localicecreambiter]

demi god LU time

the law of hyperfixations says you must combine interests at every given chance

adding a cut here as to not clog feeds!! its a real long post

i wanna hear thoughts too! so dont be afraid to comment. these are my personal opinions and i wanna hear if anyone agrees or disagrees :D (apologies for all the tags btw)

edit to add the stupid doodle

the gods all have favorites, and ironically none of them are their own kids (save for hades: he loves his kid. doesn't make him a good parent, but you know?)

In a more Zelda timeline abiding setting; Originally they weren't all at camp halfblood at the same time, but time shenanigans decided they were to be brought together

Imagine Chiron’s surprise when 7 of his dead campers waltz into camp (this happens EVERY SINGLE TIME they enter camp. Dionysus is completely unfazed, knowing the bs time shit the gods are dealing with atm)

By the time they enter camp in Wild’s Hyrule for the second time he kinda understands (Wind and Sky didnt have a Camp Halfblood, for the record, for obvious reasons)

Alternatively, its some form of modern au where they’re just from different parts of Hyrule (skyloft, downfall, ordonia, windfall peninsula, hyrule town (different from castle town), the list goes on) which would make a lot more sense for this kinda au (the world would’ve just had a LOT of calamities within the span of a few years, some of the heroes knowing about camp and others not so much)

(i think Legend, Wars, Time, Wind (post WW) and Four would’ve known about Camp Halfblood while the others were just kinda on their own until after their quests) meaning over half of them didn’t have prophecies and just went to deal with the issue themselves, possibly meaning on their journey they learned of camp

Ok well, all of them but Wars, who grew up at Camp Halfblood

All Zelda’s are children of Athena, save for Skyward Sword Zelda since she's the reincarnation of Hylia (yeah, im keeping the original Zelda goddesses! What of it?)

At some point fairly early on, a Zelda only had a son, who got together with Athena at some point and boom

Sky: child of Zeus 

self explanatory 

God of the skies? his name is literally Sky

not to mention how fucking powerful he is?

he was the "first" Link; Zeus was technically the first God, it makes sense (this is such a stupid reason)

The skies are his home, Zeus finding someone on Skyloft and “falling in love” with their love of the sky too results in this bad boy right here

The demise fight? Only a zeus kid could harbor lightning like that

A camp counselor in the modern setting (ik typically once you’re 18, you’re no longer a camper really, but shhhh)

Wind: child of Poseidon 

Don't roll your eyes, i've got a reason!!

the 4 wind gods throw a fit anytime he's sent on a quest (they all love him even if they won't admit it)

A world purely ocean and islands? Poseidon would have a fuckin ball

The Great Sea needed a hero, Wind was brought about more for necessity than out of the want to have a child (this leaves a hard disconnect between wind and the gods, knowing his dad didn’t really have him out of love for his mom but because the world needed to be saved)

The irony of Poseidon being the patron of pegasi and horses and Wind not knowing what a horse is will never not be a funny thought

Has more control over the wind than he does the sea (for now) 

he, like Legend, pointedly ignores that he's a demi-god, especially since he comes after the Hero of Time (kinda hard to live up to that, even outside of a demi-god au)

The ocean and winds are his mood ring: you upset him the wind gods are after you

In a modern setting, the same reason applies kinda; a quest under the sea would be virtually impossible for anyone but a child of Poseidon, and hell knows a cyclopes isnt gonna be sent (gotta love those prophecies) 

OR!! OR AND HEAR ME OUT

Wind isnt a demigod

The wind gods still adore him, but he doesn't have the hero’s spirit and i think that’d kinda translate to not being a demigod, yet still being the one who was destined to go on the quest because there just weren't any demigods to do it

Still not set on which id go with

Legend: child of Hades 

Ah yes, child of the big three goes on so many quests trope. Love to see it

he's Apollo's favorite favorite (Warriors is jealous as hell. Thats his dad! Wdym he likes Legend more????) 

Pointedly ignores the fact he's a demigod (at least, he definitely tries to)

Blessed by (and beefing with) so many gods from his quests

probably one of the few heroes who's spoken to their godly parent (trust me, it was out of obligation rather than free will)

Prefers helping out the more minor, underappreciated, and not as needy or bitchy gods (like Hestia, for example)

curses the Olympians constantly, they've learned to ignore him, hes their best questing kid

Sort of a general camp counselor since Hades doesn't really have kids (its technically his last year but hes been there the longest out of everyone)

Managed to block the oracle over iris message

After his trip to the dark world and lorule, the gods go haywire around him, much to his delight (because it means they leave him alone)

Hyrule: child of Hecate 

adopted by Hermes (much to the dismay of all the Hermes children)

I was on the line between Hecate, Apollo, and Hermes; Hyrule’s affinity for magic and the blood curse resulted in Hecate to win 

Very detached from the gods, the help he receives is never outright but more subtle blessings

The gods like to ignore Downfall after Legend died tbh (outside of modern, obviously)

Well, they still ignore Downfall as a city/country. 

Only learned of camp thanks to Legend, otherwise he wouldn’t have had a clue it existed

Wild: child of Athena 

Also adopted by Hermes 

One of the more chaotic children of Athena

The idea of Athena being his godly parent sourced from his resourcefulness and quick battle (or just general) strategies, along with his pre-calamity self being stoic and more on the critical side

Completely forgot he was a demigod and just let loose, Athena is more than slightly perturbed by him and yet so infatuated

Supervises archery at camp

Warriors: child of Apollo 

exemplifies almost 0 traits of his father other than his looks and his affinity for medicine (shit archer, shit musician, can't write poetry)

blessed by Athena during the war since he was struggling so much, she always has a soft spot for the heros since they fight to protect her daughters so hard (aka pity blessing) 

Actively beefing with Ares 

Aphrodite likes to keep an eye on him, mostly for entertainment (she woulda eaten the whole Cia debacle UP)

Very notorious in camp considering he was a war captain at the ripe age of 17; once learning of the whole Camp Jupiter has apartments and college for half bloods insisted and led a project at CHB to get something similar built (which is where he, Sky and Twilight stay after turning 18)

Twilight: child of Demeter

His love for ranch animals and caring for his farm lead me to this decision

Also the whole wolf thing, that also counts

Appalled by the fact Wind doesn't know what a horse is considering he's literally the son of Poseidon (jealous the kid can talk to Epona and he can't)

After his journey to the twilight, the gods kinda flicker between Greek and Roman around him so they tend to avoid him like Legend

blessed/cursed by Lupa, hence the wolf thing

Teaches foraging lessons at camp

Four: child of Hephaestus

He's the smithy, I couldn’t not say he's a Hephaestus kid

received a lot less help from the gods since he was one of the first 

started advocating that heros receive help from the divine after LU concludes so those after him have a fighting chance (not in the modern setting)

I havent played many of his games, but the kinstones sound like a thing Hephaestus would scatter across the earth as scrap from his creations

Not one of the fire wielders (the only one that can wield fire is Red when split, mostly because of the elemental bs in minish cap)

After drawing the Four Sword, Janus (despite being roman (i like to think the four sword would be a roman artifact, it just feels right)) was suddenly pretty interested and bestowed what wisdom he had for the demi-god

Vulcan, Neptune, Aeolus, and Ceres all came together to forge the elemental stones; the Minish were still the ones to bestow the sword to Hylian people

The gods tend to avoid him too, for the same reason they avoid Twilight and Legend (dark world shenanigans and the Four Sword)

He loves the damn forge at CHB, and was ecstatic seeing the one at Camp Jupiter

He was asked by Chiron if he would be interested in running a forge class for young demigods (be it his siblings or anyone interested) but sadly declined 

Has that air of responsibility to him, being a seasoned quester (and while his 3 doesn't stand to Legend’s 6, its still pretty sizable) hes looked up to by the younger campers

Time: child of Demeter Kronos? 

The Kokiri were so Demeter core dont even tell me they werent

I guess they’d kinda act like nymphs and dryads in a sense??

His abilities use to relate to his mother until the events of his first quest: the Ocarina of Time was designed to slowly corrupt the user, being a creation of Kronos’

However, it wasn’t really designed with a demigod in mind sooo…

Also self explanatory, the titan of time? Duh… huh?? what do you mean he was taken over?? What do you mean he was a child of Demeter?? No he wasnt lol that Neverrr happened

the reason he's the only “child” of a titan is mainly because of the fierce deity mask literally making him god-like, meaning he has a lot more power harbored in him sooo (the second he dawned that mask he discarded his old identity for that of a titan’s child, since it was also cursed object)

Don’t ask how he came to being Kronos’ kin, no one knows, not even he does (I do) (no, it does not imply a Hylian wandered into Tarturus and got out alive to have the baby)

Avoids interacting with the gods at all costs, he's weary of them as they are of him (even if he saved the world twice)

Extras :)

Ravio: child of Pluto 

blessed by Minerva for his natural quick witted nature and clever war strategies, if her own daughter can't succeed she might as well make sure ONE does

can tell if a rupee is real or not by glance alone

Sheerow scares the fuck out of the gods, which in turn means Ravio puts them on edge, a thing very few can achieve

the gods never gave him much thought until the events of albw, to which he suddenly gained like four pair of godly eyes on him

can and will plan one of the worlds most successful heists, refuses to participate 

also beefing with Ares (not Mars, Ares)

Based on my personal HC that Ravio’s some sort of artificer (be it replicating magic dungeon items or just flat out creating new ones) i think Vulcan has his eyes on him too

Hilda: child of Minerva 

by far the strangest child Minerva ever birthed

exemplifies the traits of a hero rather than a ruler

a little jealous her mother likes Ravio more than her

gods be damned, she's not going to let them neglect her kingdom anymore 

a force of fucking nature that single handedly forced a meeting with the gods and somehow forced them to agree to start restoring Lorule (she got the idea from Legend, who has done this multiple times for multiple different reasons)

[heartofwolfe]

Whole reason i made a new blog Can i get a word about eurylochus. Im sure other people have said it but if so then ill gladly add on the noise. I dont think hes as hypocritical and bad as some people have made him out to be? And i want to go over his crimes one by one, to bring them to a less exaggerated ground.

"He was going to abandon those men in Circe's island, therefore he had no right rebelling against Odysseus after Scylla."

I need us all to review both situations for a second. With Circe, Eurylochus witnessed what she's capable of, he KNEW Odysseus wouldn't be able to take her. Between losing his captain (and KING) and "cut their losses", it was probably logical for him to leave those men behind in place of losing any more lives or Odysseus himself. Had he known Hermes would show up to help, I'm sure he wouldn't have been so adamant on leaving. He's the voice of the crew, after all.

But Scylla? Odysseus withheld the information of what they were going to encounter in that lair. Odysseus deliberately made him light up torches (one of which would've been for HIM) that would sentence the 6 men that'd carry them. Of course, upon realizing this was his plan, he'd be mad. And we have to realize the rest of the crew are just as sentient as Eurylochus: Seeing their king give up 6 lives like they're nothing for the sake of getting home to his wife... how do they know they won't be next? The 3 men at Circe could've left like Eurylochus did, it was a slip, but Scylla was a choice. (A choice I think was the best outcome! Im not coming for Odysseus here, and I acknowledge and agree it was probably the safest way to get through Scylla. But it doesn't negate the feelings of the crew).

"He opened the wind bag and it got over 500 men killed! With that body count, he was still hypocrital to critisize Odysseus for sacrificing 6 men to Scylla"

I mean, yeah, if we leave it at that. Why don't we ask Poseidon what would've happened to Ithaca if they arrived at the shore instead of being sent to him directly?

Yes, opening the bag is breaking Odysseus' trust. He did wrong at this. But if we are gonna get nitpicky, Odysseus shouldn't have revealed his name to the Cyclops at all— Or just kill him, like Poseidon and Athena told him he should've done. I think they're both at fault for this, and even then, killing his fleet over the entirety of Ithaca is probably the best outcome somehow.

But like, overall, I just don't think we can use the 500 men excuse to throw bricks at this man. No one, not even Odysseus, realized they pissed off Poseidon by hurting Polyphemus and that's where the storm was coming. It's just cruel and it is very obvious it weighted not only on Odysseus but on Eurylochus as well.

"He killed Helios' cow despite Odysseus warning! And then got mad at Odysseus when he didn't sacrifice himself for the crew?"

I feel like he is a little unfair for getting mad at the end, but it is also just very human. We can think of it logically because it is a story we are witnessing, but most if not all of us would've lashed out and felt betrayed if our lives ended because our closest friend (and person that was supposed to look out for us) needed to see their lover.

And the cow... I need you guys to put yourself in his shoes again. Eurylochus didn't believe they'd make it home, he had given up on life, he couldn't trust his brother in arms to bring him home alive anymore. And hunger is so heavy (sorry). Between dying of starvation or drowned by Poseidon, and dying swiftly by divine intervention for pissing off Helios, he probably didn't care (and, like, if he didn't do it someone else in the crew would've. Is the thing.)

I actually think it's such a well done thing, the way he kills the cow because he gave up but deep down doesn't actually want to die— Which is why he gets desperate and seeks for Odysseus' guidance once again when he realizes what he's done. The cow is probably the hardest thing to defend from him, but i think it is so human. And so tragic.

And I need to clarify again— This isn't against Odysseus! I think he makes so many mistakes and is so selfish but also human in a way, I can see where every character is coming from in this musical. And the Odyssey is about a man losing his humanity in a journey back home, so his actions have to be. Bad. But there's a treatment of this characters that ends up coming off as a disservice to each of them. Using Eurylochus as a scapegoat to make Odysseus look better just feels like missing the point of both and their complexities to me. Cause even after defending Eurylochus here, none of these actions are entirely justifiable! He IS hypocritical and selfish as well, and maybe a bit cruel at times. But he's not the root of all evil. If he were, Odysseus wouldn't be the lead.

This post is pretty over the place, so I apologize!it isn't meant to be read as an essay or anything too serious despite the tone that might come off of it. I'm just mostly voicing my thoughts about these characters re: some takes I've seen here and there in other platforms that I can't go too much in detail about. Would love to hear other thoughts, agreeing or disagreeing, although i might not respond too in detail. Also please befriend me i need friends into epic LOL

[aaasdgnklm]

hey hye wanna hear my epic rant too bad ur gonna anyways

spoiler warning for epic: the musical, the thunder saga

Ok so the thunder saga. genuinely I’ve been shaking so much every time I’ve heard it. I’m gonna go song by song and this is a rant so theres gonna be a shitton of tangents sorry

1. suffering

this title scared me SO MUCH when I heard it cause like oh fuck my poor little guy(hes a king and has fought multiple wars and killed thousands of people) doesnt need more shit happening to him like leave him alone and then the melody was so upbeat and I was like huh?? and then ‘penelope’ starts talking and I’m like. pardon. what. sorry?? I was confused as shit, mostly at how nonchalant ODYSSEUS was. my first assumption was its gotta be one of the gods fucking w/ him but then why is he so casual? so I thought it was a dream. but then there were little things, penelope’s asking him to get in the water(which. reminds me of. someone HAHSBHADBH), and then he says hes scared of the water and I’m like. my guy I hope youre not afraid of the water youre a captain on a ship. but then I realized theres no way odys afraid of the water unless its bcuz of posideon, and penelope WOULDNT KNOW ABOUT THAT so he wouldnt say “you know I’m afraid of the water”. and then ofc shes like “daughter” and I’m like nope. this aint penelope and its not a dream cause then it would be odysseus’ mind making her up and hed never think daughter. And then odysseus asks how to get home and at this point I’m like hm. ok. so this is some kind of water based monster trying to pretend to be penelope to lure him in, right? (ALSO the fact that the only time in the song odysseus drops the act is when he says “but scylla has a cost” is so mmmmmm)and then. and then.

2. different beast

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT THIS IS WHERE THINGS GOT GOOD. like I love suffering but different beast scratches my brain SO GOOD and the rest of the saga was uphill from there I ahhhhhhhh. initial reaction: odysseus’ explanation that he knew what had been happening the whole time was SO GOOD and had my mouth hanging open the whole time. and then when he says “cut their tails off, we’re ending this now. throw their bodies back in the water. let them drown.” ohhhhhhhhhh my god holy fuck this was when it kinda hit for me- odysseus was not fucking around in monster hes actually BRUTAL in the thunder saga and I honestly hope it continues cause fuck yeah character development. also there were SO MANY lines in this that are just SO GOOD. “youve been tryna take my life this whole time” “I know exactly what you are, youre a siren.” “my real wife knows I’m not scared of the water, and my real wife knows I dont have a daughter.” “we found a ship with no crew” “sirens know about every route and horizon now I know how to get back to my island!” “so you can kill the next group of sailors in this part of the sea? nah, you wouldnt have spared me. I made a mistake like this once it almost cost my life, I cant take more risks of not seeing my wife. cut off their tails!” “kill them all!” and then the “odysseus” at the end I’m like why does that sound familiar? MFER ITS CAUSE ITS IN THE “You dont think I know my own palace? I built it.” SOUND CLIP IM

3. scylla

silly little sounds. silly little men. silly little deaths. ok so I watched the livestream so I saw the anamatic and holy SHIT the moment that eurylochus realized why odysseus had him light six torches was BRUTAL. also eurylochus’ confession that he opened the wind bag? ohhhhhhh ok MOTHER FUCKING SON OF A BITCH also when odysseus said “not much to say” god he sounds so tortured I cant with this. and scyllas voice in general is so ahhhhhh ESPECIALLY the “Hello.” and DROWN IN YOUR SORROW AND FEARS. CHOKE ON YOUR BLOOD AND YOUR TEARS. BLEED TILL YOU RUN OUT OF YEARS. WE MUST DO WHAT IT TAKES TO SURVIVE. GIVE UP YOUR HONOR AND FAITH. LIVE UP YOUR LIFE AS A WRAITH. DIE IN THE BLOOD WHERE YOU BATHE. WE MUST DO WHAT IT TAKES TO SURVIVE. with the fucking crunching and screaming in the background lik e ok. I needed this in my life.

4. mutiny

THIS IS MY FAVORITE. eurolychus’ confrontation with begging odysseus to tell him hes misinterpreted the situation, comparing odysseus’ past actions and fights to how he dealt with scylla, finally ending with him yelling at odysseus to “SAY SOMETHING!”, odysseus’ “I CANT.” and the looong pause before the boss battle starts. odysseus and eurolychus’ fight, both of them clearly not wanting to but knowing they have to. the chanting their name in the background. and then when odysseus says “I am not letting you get in my way!” and the sound of a stab- I was so scared hed actually killed eurolychus(yes I knew he dies I watched the overly sarcastic productions video on the odyssey too) and then ODYSSEYUS’ labored breathing and asking “why?” like I’m sorry jorge DID THEY STAB YOU TO GET THIS LYRIC WHY DOES HIS PHYSICAL PAIN SOUND SO GENUINE and then the. the fucking. the fucking luck runs out reprise. the MOMENT I realized it was the melody from luck runs out this is when I started crying.(dw past me it gets worse) the way that the crew is basically like “yeah remember when we asked what would happen if you fucked up? well you fucked up. and now youre finding out.” plus the fact that they are so clearly driving home we dont trust you. you failed to keep us safe. basically telling him ‘youre a bad leader’. that must have HURT. and then the fact that eurolychus bandaged him up and was waiting for him to wake up ough my heart. but also the fact that hes tied to helios’ statue? like. um. buddy. looking an awful lot like a sacrafice there. hahahahahah I’m loosing it. anyways, the luck runs out reprise hitting hard once again. like HARD. holy shit, odysseus’ “please don’t tell me you’re about to do what i think you’ll do” when that was what eurylochus said to him and then EURYLOCHUS CALLED HIM “ODY” I CANT and the eurylochus clearly being fed up(but not fed) while odysseus is actually begging him to please please think about this you can HEAR the desperation the need to get home and knowing if eurylochus kills the cow they probably wont? and then odysseus’ scream of “euRYLOCHUS NO!” cut short by the sound of eurylochus killing the cattle. and then the instant ‘oh no.’ like just INSTANTLY knowing they’re fucked and eurylochus STILL LOOKING TOWARD ODYSSEUS FOR GUIDENCE EVEN THO HE LITERALLY MUTINIED AGAINST HIM LIKE A DAY AGO AND HAS ODYSSEUS TIED UP AND AT HIS MIRCY AND HE STILL DEFAULTS TOWARDS ODYSSEUS FOR LEADERSHIP CAUSE HE STILL TRUSTS HIM and odysseus IMMEDIATELY taking charge and trying to get them out. the rushed full speed ahead melody, the boom of thunder and odysseus’ dread-filled “we’re too late.”

5. thunder bringer

IT LIVED UP TO THE HYPE GUYS!! sure enough the teasers we’ve seen are FUCKING AMAZING in the context of the song, zeus having an inflated as shit ego and taking up SO MUCH space, just like constantly talking about himself even tho IT AINT ABT HIM its so in character for what a massive dick he usually is in the greek mythos. and zeus deadass saying “if i were to make you choose, the lives of your men and crew or your own why do I think theyd loose?” right before MAKING ODYSSEUS CHOOSE. I’m. also odysseus sounds so.. small in this song. I dont know if its the fact hes literally having a mental breakdown or that zeus needs to be the biggest cock in any room he walks into but odysseus’ little “choose?” and him asking “please dont make me do this” JUST LIKE WHEN HIM AND ZEUS FIRST MET, the when does a man become a monster melody playing as odysseus tries to decide with penelopes voice asking him to come home pushing him over the edge wow. just wow. and the the conversation between odysseus and eurylochus? “captain?” “I have to see her.” “…but we’ll die.” “i know” I’m SORRY I CANT FUCKING DO THIS WHY DOES HE SOUND SO BROKEN AND REGRETFUL AND SAD AND OH MY GOD. AND THEN THE FUCKING ANIMATIC SHOWN IN THE TRAILER THE WAY HE JUST POINTS TOWARDS HIS CREW AND THEY ALL LOOK SO BETRAYED AND LOST BEFORE THEY START ATTACKING HIM AND THE LAST SHOT OF HIM CLOSING HIS EYES AS THEY PIN HIM TO THE MAST BY THE NECK WITH THEIR SWORDS AND THEN LIGHTNING STRIKES THE SHIP HOLY. also if you think about it this choice was kind of the final stress test for odysseus, because this is the ultimate decision: should he be a good king, captain, and friend or should he take the small chance to see his wife again? cause its not just about who lives and dies, its about who gets to keep going, who gets to see home, who gets a chance and who looses right now. and how could he choose the people who just stabbed him in the back and have doomed them multiple times over seeing his wife whom he loves and would do anything for? honestly, with what I know about how odysseus is, I wouldnt be very surprised if he was weighing the choice both from the emotional (seeing his wife or saving his crew) and factual (hes probably the strongest and most fit leader among them, they might not do too well on their own, ithaca needs a king and he doesnt know if telemachus can be that, one person has a higher chance of surviving than a large group in a journey(ingreekmythologyanyway), and they did just make a really dumb mistake that odysseus wouldnt have made himself and yeah ok maybe hes a little salty but still.)

genuinly the whole saga is so amazing and I’m so looking forward to the wisdom, vengence, and ESPECIALLY ithaca saga. by the way I could actually do this for every song in the musical/every saga tbh

thanks for coming to my tedtalk, I fucking love epic: the musical

[ohwell-itsme-but-danganronpa]

Official Miu Iruma Post

[contains debate about the 4th case & trial of v3, post-game irouma, a dating show au with saiouma & kiiruma, talk about her abandonment issues, parental HCs and toxic yuri, just the normal way conversations in the Pit go, I simply cut out some of the screaming, distractions and put displaced replies closer to what they're replying to]

Hina: Kokichi’s Chapter 4 plan right It’s to do two things: Save him from Miu Make himself the villain Right Cause if that’s the plan WHY PUSH MIUS BODY OFF THE ROOF Clown: That was gontas idea!! Hina: No I’m blaming Kokichi for this fuck you Ves: i think he actually meant to kill everyone but that's an unpopular opinion sndhsgfgfh Hina: THEN HE SHOULDVE LET MIU KILL HIM IM SORRY MIU HAD THE BEST MURDER PLOT IN V3 AND SHE DIDNT EVEN GET TO USE IT BECAUSE KOKICHIS A FUCKING MINDREADER Apollo: LIKE HOW DID HE KNOW? WHAT. SHE WAS ACTING WEIRD SO HE CHECKED THE COMPUTER CODE? [yes. I assumed that this was just. canon] Sini: HE COULDN’T LET MIU KILL HIM Ves: NO?????????? THAT WOULD BE FUCKIGN STUPID???????????????????? Hina: No but if his plan was to kill everyone, Miu probably could’ve gotten everyone killed Ves: "i COULD convince the strong one and the detective to help me and carefully manipulate the trial til the end, but why don't i just throw it all to the wind instead-" miu was VERY OBVIOUSLY gonna kill someone dude Clown: MIUS SO BAD AT HIDING HER INTENTIONS BUT ITS OKAY I LOVE HER

Hina: Okay no I’ll give him that But Kokichi makes a lot of assumptions Like the “He’d be frozen in a touch” thing That’s a big assumption to make Ves: NO IT IS NOT THAT IS JUST ASSUMING MIU ISN'T COMICALLY STUPID IF SHE DIDN'T THINK OF THAT SHE WOULDN'T DESERVE TO BE CALLED A GENIUS if miu has control over the virtual world, then of course she'd add some way to stop him from resisting. that's an educated guess Clown: He didn't think he was going to be frozen but I think he assumes Miu was smart enough to make a fail safe!! She needed to do something to make him killable. I don't think he knew what it was but he knew she did something! Especially since she's openly telling everyone that she took away all dangerous objects and diminished their strength?? What are you scheming queen?? Apollo: I get he's smart but can he even read code because I doubt it was just written 'freezes when Miu touches' [with what monokubs pulled up for them. it was kind of written like that] Hina: No code is usually written very fucking simple Me: It wasn't an assumption? He knew. Because he looked into what she was doing.

Apollo: I still think he should have just 'decided to piss her off' and not show up to the meeting on the rooftop. Either that or he acts real sus so someone follows him up and sees her about to murder him Clown: I think he did act kinda suspicious! Like actively making a show of needing someone to watch him or clearly getting pulled off to the side so Miu could talk to him. Chee: He was being more sus than usual and that made V3 think “someone needs to watch him” Idk why they sent Gonta over when its Kokichi actually Clown: I like to think he gave her a chance to back out. If Miu had seen him act this way and still proceed with her plan. Well that that was that. Again. Probably not what they were intending BUT LET ME BELIEVE THEY WERE FRIENDS AT ONE POINT SOBS Chee: DUDE NO I ALSO LOVE THINKING THEYRE FRIENDS THEY FUCKING WORKED TOGETHER FOR FUCKS SAKE Tehyre friends to me fuck whatever canon goes against that!! Ves: she picks him because he's one of the only people who would conceivably go to a secluded place with her and that Hurts me Me: With his views on killers he most likely thought that Miu will go for a kill no matter what and will do something else if she's not forcefully stopped. Plus, he was pissed off first, she betrayed him and he was especially cruel when talking about her after that, some elements of the plan were going out of the way to say "fuck you" to Miu (and using that to draw more suspicion to himself, but that was not necessary to do that), I think he wanted Gonta to be the winner, as somebody who stayed on his team, making it his victory, but then Gonta wasn't following the plan, meaning that he must have betrayed him too, and then Kokichi lost it

Sini: OOOOH! You mean the interpretation of him killing everyone… Let’s be real, if that’s the case, then yeah, he was dumb. Cause even with what Ves said, HE STILL FUCKED UP! FUCK REVERSE PSYCHOLOG! WHY TF WOULD YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH SM YOU DUMB BITCH!? YOU’RE GIVING OUT MORE EVIDENCE He was so dumb for it, idc. Bro, stfu….Saying Gonta is the culprit!? WHY!?!? SHUT UUUPPPP I get the logic but fuck man! It’s so risky and stupid! Why would you do that!? Ves: OH I DON'T THINK THAT WAS PART OF THE ORIGINAL PLAN CAN YOU IMAGINE LMAO that's BEYOND "risky and stupid" sini did you think i thought this the whole time HE'S BETRAYING GONTA AT THAT POINT I- Chee: YEAH I THINK THAT WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN Me: It definitely wasn't part of the original plan, that was the moment he snapped Sini: Oh. I knew that too but I forgot how you interpreted it. But he does similar shit even in the beginning of the trial. I just….I think it’s dumb. This is part of why I don’t think he planned to kill everyone Oh yeah, I know that. I just wasn’t sure what they meant, there are many ways you can interpret this theory. But yeah, I agree that he thought there would be no reasoning with her and she would kill him regardless. While he could’ve let Miu kill him, keeping Miu alive is good in case the plan were to ever fail. Her plan was really good, even Shuichi noted that without finding out about the secret of the virtual world that they would’ve been fucked. She could’ve very well won had he just let her kill him, but still, it’s better he have control over the situation than potentially die for no reason while the game continues. I get that. But like….What did Gonta do to not follow with the plan? From what I remember, by the time Kokichi outed Gonta….He didn’t do anything?? No one suspected him until he brought it up. Gonta became suspect because of him. Why would he do that? Are you saying he got so pissed that Gonta was good at not being sus that he changed his mind? Cause I honestly find that ridiculous. It is literally essential that Gonta not be suspicious so that they win…. Was it a method to make Gonta not suspicious by making him suspicious? But again, why? No one was ever suspecting him and he should know that most of everyone would never suspect him as the culprit at that point because it’s Gonta. Yes, they’ve suspected Gonta plenty times before and you could say they only reacted that way cause Kokichi was the one saying it, but…I feel at that point everyone grew closer to Gonta and would have that genuine bias. Kokichi outing Gonta just led to him spewing more evidence that got them fucked even before he snapped at him. He was basically giving hints since the beginning of the trial. I always read it like he was doing what he usually did until Shuichi and the others pissed him off. Then Gonta pissed him off by denying everything and everyone believing him despite the evidence. Ves: it's not that gonta didn't follow the plan, it's that he followed it too well. you have to remember that kokichi had no way of knowing about the cord mixup; from his perspective, gonta was just lying his ass off. and he was lying so well kokichi wouldn't've been able to tell if he hadn't seen him kill her. even in an interpretation where he planned to betray gonta from the beginning, i think that would've freaked him the hell out

Sini: But he wasn’t really lying before…. He wasn’t doing anything. He was barely present in the trial until that point. Ig that’s a form of lying, maybe Kokichi expected him to be all nervous and shit?? But….Is that good enough reason to out him and abandon your plan??? I see some people say how he could’ve suspected Gonta as the mastermind, but I can only see him suspecting that after he outed him. And even then…If he was the mastermind…Why would he follow his plan in the virtual world in the first place? Surely Kokichi must’ve thought of that. To think he’s the mastermind based off of good lying alone, while understandable, is also a bit of a stretch. Kokichi knows there is more to Gonta than what people see, he’s seen him lie before. It’s just at that moment where it’s taken to a whole other level that even rivals his own (at least that’s what he thinks). But still…I just….He said that unprompted and I can’t think of a good reason as to why he’d do that after planning all this out There is Gonta debating Shuichi before I think but that’s still not enough to do something like call him the culprit I feel…. I just don’t understand it. Maybe I’m giving Kokichi too much credit, but it’s weird. Ves: gonta has repeated that he doesn't understand over and over in a very convincing (because it's true) way by that point tho idk ch4 doesn't make a lot of sense to me without the idea that kokichi was originally planning to follow through TBF though it's the clearest example of kokichi being a microcosm of v3; it's meant to be up to the player to decide what they believe, and that means there's evidence both ways. it's definitely a weird way to write a character Sini: But again, Kokichi knows he isn’t stupid. He must know he can probably pull off just saying “I don’t understand”. Not to mention, I don’t think he’d do something like this at all. Chapter 1 he acknowledges how if they die, they can just bring in new people and the games will continue. While everyone dying is a unsatisfying ending, it’s not enough to end the game. It has enough entertainment value and not enough scandal where it could do that much damage. Kokichi must still think this is all a show even if at that moment where he believed what he saw in the vault was real. Is it really winning the game and bringing justice to those who died if he follows the rules practically to a T and kills everyone? It’s not that much of a satisfying ending for him either. Ig he could’ve not known what else to do and was overwhelmed with despair, but I personally don’t think he’d want things to go that way. But that’s just me. I agree that it’s written in a way where you don’t really know what’s the truth. I understand the theory and I think the idea is cool, with enough evidence to support it. To me though, it just doesn’t jive

[I just got hit in the face with a crack theory: What if he made it so it looks like he gave in to the motive and wants to kill everyone so the mastermind doesn't intervene before he gets to flip the switch on them?] Ves: that's a totally fair interpretation!! i haven't asked - do you think he believed what he saw at the end of the tunnel :o? oh and also. i think believing what he saw would undo his ch1 belief about them just bringing more people in..? where would they get them from Clown: I guess that's assuming he'd believe the world really did end. But thats vauge too, how much did he believe it? How long? Did he even believe it in the first place? WHO KNOWS Ves: i think he did believe it. i mean, he was THERE. he saw the broken world stretch out to the horizon, he felt the air leave his lungs that's very different than a flashback light Sini: Well, that’s the thing. I feel like he believed what he saw but soon afterward started to doubt it given everything else he witnessed. Why things are the way they are…It only makes sense if it’s a show. Kokichi himself acknowledges that in Chapter 5. The flashback lights….There’s so many things to not be trusted here. If they can pull off crazy rooms, executions, and robots, could they fabricate what he saw and experienced? Maybe it is real but there are survivors out there. I think Kokichi was in constant conflict about it Ves: it could be a show for just one person. i think that'd haunt him and yeah i agree about him being in constant conflict Clown: I do think he believed it for a good while!! It's hard not to. It probably effected him more than he realized. But at the same time the world around his is changing in completely unnatural ways, he acknowledges that it feels as though they're following a script sometimes. So that gave him room for doubts. But he couldn't really be sure Kodaka was a coward for not giving us a bonus unlockable scene where ouma sees the world end, BY HIMSELF, ALL ALONE, and just implodes in on himself for a little while I wanna see how he reacted!!! I wanna see why he even managed to get up again!! Ves: MAYBE I'M ALSO A COWARD JESUS Sini: I’m fine with not getting anything. The whole point is that he’s a mysterious character. The way we see him is supposed to be somewhat similar to how Shuichi sees him, constantly questioning wtf he is up to and how he feels But that would be cool tho Clown: I can agree with that! I do love that there's so much room to theorize about him This is entirely self indulgent askshjdh WHERES THE POV SWITCH KODAKA?? WHERE?? Sini:Yeah, same. I indulgently want a Kokichi Ouma novel but writing wise that’s a shitty idea Clown: Yeahhh, unless their willing to break away from the embodiment of a lie thing, at least a little, than i wouldn't have high hopes Or they could evilify him more thats also something that could happen

Hina: Me writing a whole Kokichi Miu fight scene be like Chee: no dude I actually enjoy that BC THERES NO WAY AFTER ALL THAT HAPPENED IN GAME THEY WOULDNT FIGHT Im just still praying theyll be friends after the fighting or something [sob emoji]

[conversation went into detail about how fucked up Kokichi novel could turn out to be if we got it (and so it's best it doesn't happen)] Clown: Miu and kokichi get an explosive divorce Ves: okay no i want this actually that sounds HILARIOUS Sini: That already happened in V3 tho Me: they are SO divorcecore <3 /pos Ves: they are the OPPOSITE of the "i don't argue with beautiful women, my wife hits me with a hammer and i walk it off" tweet Me: and I love that for them! frenemies irouma is nice, but they could take that to a higher level Ves: IT IS romantic iruma is just so inherently hilarious that "higher level" is divorce court Sini: “My wife tried to hit me with a hammer, that bitch got strangled” Clown: It's like the ending of one of those shows where they try and pair everyone off into couples but they explode as a result Maybe literally Miu puts a bomb in oumas cereal Sini: It’s their love language, dw Clown: They only got married because the people of their affections also got hit with the straight people ray and they're mourning together/hj Shuichi should marry maki to make it worse Ves: they're all cheating on each other Worst Suburb Of All Time Me: this gave me a VIOLENT flashback to that one hamilton songfic (Say No To This? I think) where Miu wrote Saihara a threathening letter bc Ouma was her husband and saiou was having an affair

Sini: Salmon Mode: Love is Blind edition Ves: hold on i've got a better one the ultimatum …actually hold on maybe i'm NOT joking an ultimatum au would kinda slap… are saiou in preexisting relationships or did they come together shuuichi issuing the ultimatum to kokichi would be TASTY but so would them falling in love and leaving their unhappy relationships for each other,,,, one person in a couple wants to get married, the other isn't so sure. they go on the show where they pick another person to be in a 'trial marriage' for a couple weeks, then go back to their original partners, then decide 'the ultimatum' is 'marry or our relationship is over' Clown: Oohh man I dunno. Them as a preexisting couple is ANGST AND PAIN and ✨️ drama ✨️ But them coming together is [teary eyed cat emoji] Hina: Okay but that's so good if they're preexisting in a relationship Me: the "getting back together" energy (despite there being no break-up and only a threat of it) is definitely up your alley and it could be neat, but them getting paired up for a few weeks fake relationship that's not intended to last should be injected in my bloodstream immediately or I'll die Ves: they're meant not to last, to be a test before they go back to their Real partners, but they find themselves happier than they ever were AUUUUUGH Hina: If we're being realistic though wouldn't Kokichi bail the moment Shuichi offers an ultimatum like that? Ves: IF WE'RE BEING REALISTIC NEITHER OF THEM WOULD GO ON REALITY TV IN THE FIRST PLACE THIS EXISTS SO I CAN HAVE FUNNY SAIOUMA COUCH ASIDES AND ENDGAME SMOOCHES Clown: Can't remove brain from shuichi giving the ultimatum because ouma is a flighty nerd- NEED THERE TO BE A SWEET SCENE WHERE GONTA AND KOKICHI BOND BECAUSE OF THEIR SIMILAR CIRCUMSTANCES BUT ON OPPOSITE ENDS. Gontas straightforward point of view seems illogical, it doesnt even take into account how much could go wrong, but its suprisingly comforting. Maybe ouma shouldn't focus on the fail safes… AND HE GAINS PLUS 1 BUDDY OLE PAL [I skipped a big part of the conversation suggesting other couples, but one of them was Gonta and Kirumi] Ves: gonta and kokichi come out Best Friends he's the best man at the saiou wedding unsure if kokichi gets this privilege also because. kirumi. but STILL Clown: She doesn't want his greasy face in the wedding party thats understandable If you wanna add some ✨️ drama ✨️ maybe shuichi is just a tad jealous over seeing ouma so genuinely connect with someone. After such a short time too?? Shuichi goes "this is fine" as if he isn't iron gripping the table Ves: he thinks kokichi's left him for bigger tits greener pastures meanwhile gonta is patting his back while he wails drunkenly about shuuichi inevitably leaving him he's NOT jealous he is a responsible partner he does not feel Bad Emotions he does NOT- he's not coping and seething that gonta is better at protecting kokichi from spiders

Ves: who is shuuichi's partner. rantarou is Not Allowed it hurts my brain Hina: Wow smh Miu/j Ves: he'd never pick her but GOD it'd be funny Clown: MAYBE KIIBO, FOR THE EXTRA LACK OF BRAIN CELLS Did Miu drag kiibo there?? Ves: love hotel abandonment issues flashbacks Clown: She would vent this in a completely public scandalous way I love that for her Miu iruma the walking disaster beloved Ves: why doesn't kiibo want to get married? is it just bc miu's being Like That about it or does he have his own issues Hina: What if their relationship is still fairly new Like less than a year Clown: "We aren't financially stable and the average expectancy of dating years before marriage is 4-6 years, we haven't yet to agree upon how many kids we would have because 8 is illogical. I think we should wai-" and Miu is throwing a tantrum Ves: i don't think i've ever seen kiiruma as anything but a fluffy side ship this is spinning in my brain oughhh miu iruma you are the worst gf of all time i love you messy bitch she's gonna key his car they are neurodiverging in opposite directions kiibo's autistic robot ass is planning things out according to nothing but logic meanwhile miu is traumatized and brain damaged and putting beans in all his shoes he doesn't Get why she's so sensitive about this he's said he's not going to leave her, and he's never proved himself a liar, so why doesn't she believe him??? actually on that topic. why do u guys think miu is Like That?? she apparently has very severe abandonment issues but they're brought up ONCE and NEVER EXPLAINED it bothers me i need to fill that gap with hc

Sini: Miu [handshake emoji] Kokichi Crippling trust/abandonment issues. Your love? They do not see Ves: and that's why they make such inch resting friends :) Sini: I hc her mother left her and her dad. Perhaps she also had a childhood friend who abandoned her since in the Love Hotel she sees you as one Ves: i'm inclined to say someone (a parent?) just BOOKED it while she was in the coma Clown: Oohhh!!! Similar hc!!! I also think she was raised by a single dad. Mom was too focused on her career Ves: i gave her a single mom LMAO does she just radiate Divorced Kid Energy??? Sini: SHE DOES HONESTLY What if they left after her coma? I can imagine it going like that…. Ves: i mean her personality was probably different by then maybe they just…didn't like her anymore…… Clown: Ahsgshwhs, I just think part of her sense of humor comes from the fact that her father was like…one of those drunk uncles who gives you shittiest dating advice and has been divorced 3 times and is not at all a bad person but has clearly made far too many mistakes. And he's her MAIN caretaker. And so he talked to her more like a friend than a daughter and so she really was craving some sort of bond she considered unbreakable, someone to take care of her. AND WHATS THAT?? ON TV?? YOUR ROMANTIC ENDEAVOR WOULD DIE FOR YOU?? YES PLEASE??? Ves: SHE JUST WANTS SOMEONE TO OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR FOR HER, IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK Sini: Men these days, smh Hina: Easy, don't date men Ves: WOMEN WILL NOT FIX HER ISSUES HINA Clown: WOMEN COULD MAKE HER WORSE, TOXIC DOOMED YURI WHEN Ves: her and ouma, if you're not a COWARD Sini: Toxic doomed yuri fem!Kokichi/Miu. 100k words- Me: where [and I still don't see a fucking link] Hina: Ever female Kokichi I've seen scares me So yes I am a coward Me: multigendered Kokichi then, it can still be yuri and that's my preferred hc anyway Ves: kokichi's already a girl to ME. multigender queen Hina: I mean Big boobs Heterosexual Female Kokichi Sini: The big boobs are a red flag Me: I can excuse heterosexuality, but I draw the line at Kokichi with boobs /ref Sini: YOU EXCUSE HETEROSEXUALITY!?

[speakofthedebbie]

this one goes out to my platonic soulmate @starryeyeddreamer21 :3 (IDK HOW MY HCS ENDED UP SO SIMILAR TO YOURS I SWEAR IT JS HAPPENED-)

only the hazbin gang + luci and cherri cuz im biased

hazbin charas rated least to most likely to crash the car during the charlie-mandated bonding road trip

husk

dont wanna js repeat what i said here but i strongly believe he would be the least likely to crash. forget what people say about old people driving, id trust his old man back over literally anyone else any day of the week.

2. alastor

(whaat i was checking when cars were invented to see if he would even know how to drive one no siree-) on a serious note, while i just cant picture him driving, i feel like he would still know how out of principle. he'll def put on some jazz and throw you out the window if you try to change it.

3. luci

while starr (can i call you that?) brings up the good point of him not needing to cuz flying/teleportation/having drivers, you cant really live as long as he has without knowing a thing or two. his ass would def need pedal extenders tho LMAO-

4. vaggie

she also tech need to cuz wings/princess of hell girlfriend priviliges, i wouldnt put it past her. but once again, gonna need some pedal extenders-

5. sir pentious

while he doesnt have feet, im sure hed be more than able to make a lil something. i mean he piloted a zeppelin, im sure he can manage a car-

6. charlie

inspired partially by Igual (long winding chaggie fic that you should totally check out!), i feel charlie would be the type to just.. not know how to do basic things cuz of her sheltered upbringing (no hate to her parents, lord knows theres a lot of shit to shelter her from in hell lol) she would be waaay too overly cautious, to the point where it earns her more problems. i wouldnt exactly trust her behind the wheel, but if worst came to worst it probs wouldnt be that bad.

7. niffty

first of all, short. second of all, given her already erratic behaviour in the show, im not sure it would be wise to trust her in a vehicle. that is if they dont forget her loud house style LMAO-

8. angel/cherri

theyre both so bad they had to share a tier. likewise to starr, theyre def the daredevil types. to quote starr: "[Angel]'s always driving like he's running from the cops" and honestly, given his life history, he probs was LMAO- i love them, but i would not trust their asses behind the wheel if it killed me. just like them driving probably would-

seriously, go check out starr's version! i was focusing purely on the driving aspect, so theirs is more in dept

next up, picking random ass words and making hazbin headcanons out of them- (jkjk... unless?)

[rimaurimau]

the whole 1975 thing pisses me off. people cant seem to comprehend that this isnt some black and white situation where its just homophobia because its so much more than that. i couldnt care less if he jacked off on stage, the problem is that he did this in a country thats incredibly queerphobic and because of that is incredibly strict on what bands can play here and what they can and cant do/say. We malaysians don't get alot od international bands as is, so bands like this and the strokes coming here of all places in our shit hole country is huge. but him saying and doing all that did this:

- cancelled the entire event because our government caught wind of it and shut it down after the first night when it was supposed to go on for 3

- probably made the rules and restrictions for bands to play here even tighter

- made other bands hesitant to play here

- maybe even tightened up the laws on queer people here in general, even more worse than they already are

- possibly put a lot of queer malaysians in general in danger because if the pigs suddenly decided to investigate the event further and question the organisers or people who attended and those people happened to be queer and they found out? theyre going straight to jail because that's how queer people are treated here by our government

yeah there are a good chunk of people here angry purely because of homophobia, that fact isnt something that can be denied or glossed over. but the most important thing here is the queer people that are gonna be put in danger. we're already consistently used as a political scape goat. but now we've finally started to take baby steps in the right direction of progress after finally electing the first pm in our history thats leftist (when in reality he's centrist at best) and now with how matty healy behaved and what he said, our governments fear of queer people have been confirmed and we might be in even more hot water. they've already discussed about making being queer a mental illness and this might give them the push to confirm everything.

what he did did nothing but do bad. we didnt need some white guy to tell us how oppressed we are, how queer people are ridiculed discriminated and abused, trust me buddy, we've lived here all our lives, we know, we dont need any white saviour telling us this.

people will scoff at countries like Malaysia because of how queerphobic it is and simply throw any empathy and kindness out the window, but people seem to forget that this queerphobia exists for a reason. the queerphobia here exists because WE exist, because WE QUEER MALAYSIANS EXIST. it doesn't just exist just because, they're hateful of us because we are here, they're hell bent on getting rid of us because we are here.

I've seen some people say "then just don't get international bands" why? why dont we get to have the opportunity to see the bands we like? why dont we get to have fun? what makes so inherintly lesser that we dont get to indulge in stuff like this like people from other countries do? we already are barred from being openly queer, is it so much to ask that we just want to have a good time by seeing bands we love? do we not deserve that just because people think our government and the shit heads here represent our entire country, acting like theres absolutely no queer communities here constantly fighting for our right to exist? is that why people think so lowly of us?

queer malaysians are now in danger and our progress have been set back 50 steps thanks to matty healys "activism". I understand that he did it in good faith, but it just came off as entitled, privileged and selfish, especially with how he handled it after the fact.

if you're here to argue or insult me on this post, dont bother, im blocking you. im not wasting my time.

[gryphonlover]

Unscheduled Brainrot

So I drove to another state to visit my fiancee at their college today, which was super fun and awesome. I got to pick them up from class AND I SAW A DUDE IN A JACKET THAT WAS JUST NICHOLAS CAGE’S FACE. LIKE THE BACK OF THE ENTIRE JACKET WAS JUST HIS FACE. IT WAS ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE. WHEN MY WRIST STARTS FUNCTIONING AGAIN IM GONNA NEED TO DRAW WIND IN IT. DUDE IT WAS JUST INCREDIBLE TO WITNESS

but on the way home I was trapped in the far lane on a huge interstate highway because this asshat pickup truck was intentionally not letting me get around him by either speeding up or slowing down. like he was doin’ it on fucking purpose. and i almost missed my chance to merge onto the highway that leads to MY state. had a bigger pickup truck not ridden that guy’s ass and pushed him faster, i would’ve been pushed onto a different highway going to a secret third state, and a part of this god forsaken country I’ve never been before. but no, the bigger truck came to my rescue so slay to irritating assholes who HAVE to go like 90 miles an hour or they’ll explode, this time it came to my advantage because he stopped the asshole guy from slowing down when i tried to slow to get behind him. i think i should be allowed to eat his tires…

i also didn’t have to go to the ER or urgent care today so MASSIVE fucking slay, because I was hell bent on visiting my fiancee and quite frankly nothin was gonna stop my ass- I had to cancel my plans yesterday because of this weird ass reaction i keep having, but i refused to do so today and thank god it didn’t bite me in the ass because having to cancel this would’ve ruined my whole month more so than this obnoxious reaction has so far (its starting to cause problems again and I’m considering biting my arm off /hj)

i need to get back on top of things for whumptober, but i keep getting ideas for cute little fics of Twi just chilling and having a nice time. and like, that’s great and all, but its WHUMPtober, not “Twilight makes flower crowns for his goats” tober

anyways, I really hope you’re doing alright, take care of yourself and get plenty of water food and rest :) *throws good vibes your way*

and also i hope this shit is coherent 😭

- crazylittlejester

@crazylittlejester

That sounds like an awesome outfit, actually. :0 Maybe not my style, but I would definitely wear that at least once to terrorize my college friends.

Glad you didn't get lost, that could've been bad. :[ I only drove for a road trip twice, and the second time I almost fell asleep at the wheel.

Honestly, you deserve a break. Good for you. Fingers crossed that whatever it is goes away and minds its own business.

Hear me out: Twilight gets a nice vacation while everyone else is whumped in the background. They don't say anything because they don't want to stress him out since he's finally relaxed.

Things have been going okay. I'm starting to feel negative consequences creep up on me again, but I've been getting lots of love and hugs from my roommates. :)

[haunted-linguini]

Hey, I saw some of your matchups and was wondering if you could do one for me? I’ve never done one of these so forgive me haha.

I am a 5’3 girl, though I tell people I’m 5’4. I’ve always been considered ‘the weird kid’ but as I grew up people started to use it lovingly. Because I don’t let people get me down. I was a dinosaur kid, and I am currently a Theatre Kid. The feeling of being on stage invigorates me, and being able to be someone else feels euphoric. I love movies, especially Quentin Tarantino movies. My favourite movie is Alien, because I’ve always wanted to be like Ellen Ripley. I also love video games. I have long, shiny black hair. Straight and hard to curl and I love when my friends braid it. I’m of Native American decent. I’m pretty strong, and usually get into play fights with my friends. A teacher has told me I look like I’d be ‘a good wrestler’. I’m usually wearing something comfortable. I’m good at many forms of art, painting, drawing, sculpting, crafting. I especially like drawing monsters, creatures with sharp teeth. Usually because I need monsters for DND. Also because I like horror movies. Corey scenes are my favourite, because I love the acting and special effects. I may go “gross” but I will have to keep watching.

I don’t get in trouble much, even when I should. Because I’m one of those teens who teachers like too much to be mad. I have a potty mouth, and my friends usually can’t control what comes out of my mouth. So I say things I shouldn’t, but I also say things people need to hear. I know how to help people because I know how it feels when you need it. Im very good at insults, because my insults are true. But I’d only insult my best friends. And I only insult them on things I know they won’t be mad at or feel bad about. And they insult me back in a heartbeat. It’s a sort of loving thing. My friends either describe me as “sparkly and happy” or “gonna take over the world, but not know what country you’re taking over” because I may be smart but when I get going I lack common sense. My philosophy teacher may or may not think I’m evil, but that’s ok. I have a good grade in that class. Travelling with friends, they always insist on getting me one of those book bags with leashes on them because I wander a lot. I can’t help but get distracted by following a leaf I saw in the wind or a bird that just seems to want me to follow it. On hikes I go off trail because I can’t help but think I know better. My favourite song is Love Story by Taylor Swift, and I’m sorry but I scream the lyrics with my friends. In the front seat of the car, child lock on, making the boys in the back sing along. Nothing more fun. I’m very accepting of anyone and everything, and understand why people do bad things. I was raised in a not so nice area, so I saw things happen to people and saw what become of them. So I try to look for good in anyone, and I’m good to people who hurt me. Because you never know what hurt them. It’s why I make friends so quick.

Also, Starbucks coffee gets me wired. Very hyper after any Venti iced coffee. Get me Starbucks and say “hello gorgeous” and I will love you forever.

you fr sound like an anime protag and i want to be your friend :,)

(also sorry for the delayed response i'm working like 2.5 jobs rn ;-;)

i match you with: Jeff the Killer!

Jeff is the type of guy to see someone throwing insults and his interest is immediately piqued

will casually offer up bait to get a snarky response out of you

it's his way of flirting

despite what ANYONE thinks, jeff is a theatre kid at heart

the flamboyance, pretending to be someone you're not - it all gets him

jeff also gives very much 'kid on a leash at disneyworld' energy - and he LIKES that someone else will indulge him in his chaoticness

ADORES the bluntness: because that's how he is and would prefer someone to cut to the chase instead of beating around the bush

would be the type to casually ask you out during a hang out sesh eight times

"i adore you"

"what?"

"I SAID I NEED TO GET NEW SHOES"

eventually he makes it obvious through some gesture like getting you a coffee and writing a note to you

but if you ever speak of it to ANYONE, he will deny deny deny

until it becomes impossible to do so

"dude why are you blushing at their text...?"

"STOP LOOKING AT MY PHONE WHAT THE FUCK"

def a softie at heart and will give all the smooches and lovins

just make sure it stays between you two

will still hold your hand in public

for your his sake

i hope you enjoyed!! :)

plan on getting to all the reqs in my inbox tonight!!

[domjaehyun]

jewel my looooove it’s been a few days !!! 🥺 i have one more shift tomorrow (it’s a day shift this time hehe) and then im off for the rest of the week and weekend :) one of my best friends is visiting me for the weekend too i’m soooo excited i lowkey have a crush on this guy so i’m like super excited to have him over a for a few days 😭😭 DID U HEAR SMTHN?? ���. anyways bub HOW ARE YOU I’ve missed you terribly and oh my god i have so much haechan content for you SO MUCH HES just so 💕💘💞💗💓💖💕💘💞💗💓💖💘💞💗💓💖💕💘💞💗💖 u know ?? i hope u enjoy and as always LOVE U and i’ll come back after my shift tomorrow <3 — 🫧

HIII omg you got this being off sounds exciting :D and OMG GOOD LUCK W UR LOWKEY CRUSH THAT SOUNDS SO FUN NO I DIDNT HEAR ANYTHING…MUSTVE BEEN THE WIND…. i’m good!! i’ve been taking out my hair to get it redone soon and i’ve been writing :D and OKAY HERE I GI

1) he’s trying to kill me. he is . look at his goddamn face i need him so bad

2) THIS IS THE CLIP THAT CONVERTED ME IM GONNA SCREAM he is so fine look at him eye fúcking the camera like that i need him right now

3) he’s the handsomest ever i love him i LOVE HIM he makes dabbing sweat look so attractive

4) he is SO CUTE WTF HES SO!!!

5) id pass out if he showed up looking this good to my fancall

6) he’s my baby girl i fear i NEVER SAY THAT BUT HE IS

7) i need his bbl atp I NEED IT *spongebob meme*

8) NO I CANT I CANT I CANT I NEED HIM

9) i’m ready. gimme it. gimme it NOW

10) when he :’)))))) i love him HES THE CUTEST EVER

11) that first pic is devastating me AS IS THE LAST ONE UGHHHGGHGGGH

12) haechan i cant live like this anymore HES SOOOOOOOO CUTE I NEED HIM SO BAD

he really is so *screaming, crying, throwing up sounds* i’m glad u get me 🥲

my sense of time is warped I HOPE UR SHIFT GOES/WENT WELL :’) ILYSM HAVE A GOOD DAY!!!

[azlovesem]

Yeah. Or somrone who got away with a lot of murders and people are happy that hes not in jail. Only scum bags died and the main thing everyone even god needs to remember. They were all bad i judged for myself forget yuz. And i aint gonna fuckn miss any of them. I dont care if it was gods cousin ill fight anyones god on the issue. Im Azriel if uiu ask people some say im God in my own right. Bad ass of heaven oe face of God its why im pretty handsome. But scareed. So font fuvk atpund or ill kill you and uour do called hod next. Noticc i put a small g whrn i doeak of uour god yhats an i sult. The highest i sult. Azriel thats my name ill see you and your pissant punk ass or any other goof bag name on the battlefield on my earth. I am war my name means murder and war as well. Fuck that book its a book of nonsense lies you dont get. Ill interpret your religious text better than your highest priesr or whatever. Holy roller. But ehat a waste of my time. Ill opt to defeat you militarliy befire i ever do that. I chalkenge all the highest of the highest priests to duels no not arguments. A duel to the death with sword or pistol. I rule you lost already im just gnna kill you for fun. It dont get harder than me or this im challenging your right to exist period on my planet. Lets go whose first??? What hood fo uou fo here who do you help? Why should you not burn or be blown away. I feel you know i know youre false so get right begore its too late. It gets real resl fast when desling eith Archs trll uiur stupid goof ass lies to someone else.i figure out a military solution to you instead. All people are just people. And modern man is leaving religion where it belongs in the fuckn dustbin of history you realize thats hapoening and will continue to. Its just progress natural. Wheres thos god you speak of. He didnt sjow up from what i can tell ours did. So we ll decide the issue. You know what that means as usual. Wind that war down. Politicsl help isnt coming. Dont make us ask again you know what that means too. I already know they wont stop. Strike one small battle at a time. Back the main force up. A friends dsughteebthats yhw most i can say. Ya back up or i havevto find someone in new york and throw them out a window. You understand. Gor me its budiness for hom iuts his daughter.

i

[pesterloglog]

Dave Strider, Dirk Strider, Jake English

Meat, page 5

DAVE: bro im watching you on the tube and i gotta say

DAVE: while the beatdown you just received was as thorough as it was humiliating im afraid as usual the solution to this problem should probably not involve your decapitation

DAVE: you fucking drama queen

DIRK: Damn.

DIRK: Are you sure?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: jake just kicked your ass

DAVE: thats really all there is to say on the matter

DIRK: You’re probably right.

DIRK: But still not entirely sure we should be so quick to rule out my beheading as a catchall solution to any given problem.

DIRK: It really could save us all a lot of trouble in the future. Especially me.

DAVE: its really amazing how this meme we have going here continues to be exactly as funny as the day it was established

DIRK: Isn’t it always though?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: by the way

DAVE: how DID you get your ass kicked so bad

DAVE: jake sucks and his raps are fucking awful

DAVE: please tell me this garbage show is as rigged as it looks

DIRK: Dave, there’s such a thing as showmanship.

DIRK: I’m sure I don’t need to explain this to you, of all people.

DAVE: ok cool its fake just making sure

DIRK: Sigh.

DIRK: We really don’t like to use that word.

DAVE: lmao ok

DIRK: Holding back a little to achieve certain results doesn’t necessarily mean you’re participating in a farce or rigging the event.

DIRK: We do this all the time. We hold back our thoughts, our true feelings, our full potential. We disguise how much we know about what and when, for many purposes. To ease relations, to let others behave naturally and make up their minds without undue intervention. To wait for the right moments to show our hands, to pick our battles.

DIRK: In life, there are many reasons to show restraint, which would never be regarded as an attempt to rig reality.

DAVE: oof

DAVE: my dog you are full of some SHIT today arent you

DIRK: Absolutely.

DIRK: And when it comes to theater, there are just as many reasons for restraint. To build tension. To set the stage. To give the people someone to root against.

DAVE: is that what youre doing now

DAVE: making people root against you

DIRK: What, by losing a round? No, man. That’s just standard pacing stuff when it comes to battlecraft.

DAVE: no i mean by holding up the whole fight by talking to me

DAVE: i can see you on tv

DAVE: theyre booing you dude

DIRK: Oh.

DIRK: Then yes, I guess that is what I’m doing.

JAKE: Dirk are you going to be much longer with your telephone call?

JAKE: The crowd is getting feisty... you didnt get too badly winded from our last scrum did you dirk?

DIRK: Haha, no Jake. I’m fine. I’ll just be a minute.

JAKE: What about the agitated rabble? Theyre starting to throw things.

DIRK: I don’t know. Do a dance or something. Sing a song.

DIRK: They love anything you do.

JAKE: Ummm.

JAKE: Ok sounds stupid but ill try.

DAVE: why do you want people to hate you so much

DAVE: its fucked up

DIRK: You’re reading way too much into it.

DIRK: If I wanted another round of embarrassingly indulgent and mutually masturbatory psychoanalysis, I would have called my daughter instead.

DAVE: hm

DAVE: do i need to point out how fucking weird what you just said was or can that start going without saying at this point

DIRK: I think it can go without saying.

DAVE: nice

DIRK: The point is, playing myself up as a villain figure in this hacky rap pageant has nothing to do with getting people to dislike me. Besides, everyone loves a good villain. When they boo, they don’t really mean it.

DIRK: I think you’d be surprised by how popular I actually am.

DAVE: i dunno man

DAVE: did...

DAVE: did someone just throw a diaper at you

DIRK: There’s gonna be some diapers, yeah.

DAVE: sounds bad

DIRK: The point is, this is much less about me, and more about providing a foil for Jake’s heroism and charisma.

DIRK: It’s very important that his popularity continues to be cultivated, to maximize his political capital.

DAVE: political capital

DAVE: what the fuck are...

DAVE: ok how long have you known about the jane thing

DAVE: i mean is this something you have been planning for like

DAVE: a long time or

DIRK: Planning is such an intense word.

DAVE: god damn it

DIRK: Look, let’s just say there have been some conversations.

DIRK: Does that meet with your approval?

DAVE: jane is a shitty candidate dude

DAVE: shes going to be so shitty

DIRK: I thought you’d feel that way.

DIRK: I respectfully disagree.

DAVE: i get shes a good friend of yours and all but even you have to admit how far up her own ass she is

DIRK: Of course. I consider it to be among her best qualifications for the job.

DAVE: christ

DAVE: ok if nothing else have you at least taken into account the DEVASTATION to the economy this will cause???

DIRK: You know perfectly well how much we differ on fiscal policy.

DIRK: Maybe this isn’t the best time for one of our epic debates on the subject?

DAVE: yeah what was i thinking

DAVE: wasting the time of the dude currently holding up a televised rap contest so bad hes gettin diapers thrown at him

DIRK: Dave, I think if you search your soul, you’ll come to the same conclusion I have. Jane is just what this planet needs.

DIRK: We’ve all had our fun here, but it’s easy to overlook the fact that civilization on Earth C is hardly a sustainable proposition.

DIRK: Just beneath the surface, it’s quite a dangerous and unstable place.

DAVE: i know that

DAVE: which is why actually i think it would be cool to have a president that is good instead of bad

DIRK: He’s not as great as you think.

DAVE: what

DAVE: who

DAVE: obama??

DAVE: how dare you

DIRK: No, fool.

DIRK: Karkat.

DAVE: oh

DIRK: I think your heart is in the right place, but the dude is a complete amateur.

DIRK: He’ll get eaten alive. I also have a hard time imagining he even wants the job.

DIRK: Really, it’s an awful idea for him to even run. Think about how much it’s going to inflame the interspecies tensions on this planet. Is that what you want?

DIRK: I’m happy for both of you, really. It’s nice that you encourage and support each other in this way. But you’re sending him on a fool’s errand which can only end badly.

DAVE: wait

DAVE: how do you even know hes entering the race

DAVE: we like just decided this

DIRK: A competent political operative has his ways.

DIRK: Besides, it was always pretty obvious to me you’d react this way the moment the announcement was made.

DAVE: ok thats kinda creepy i guess but it doesnt change anything

DAVE: hes running for president and hes going to fuckin win end of story

DIRK: Fair enough.

DAVE: though now im wondering

DAVE: since you and jane have been planning this for a while how many key endorsements have you locked up

DAVE: cause if youve already got jake on your side then i guess we might as well just fucking quit

DIRK: I wouldn’t worry about that.

DIRK: He and I don’t quite have the rapport we once did.

DIRK: He’s “over me” and doesn’t spare opportunities to make ostentatious demonstration of this claim.

DAVE: um

DIRK: Basically he doesn’t like being told what to do. Especially not by me.

DIRK: So it’s fair to say as of now, he’s still fully in play.

DIRK: Not that I should be encouraging you, really.

DAVE: you are one doubletalking son of a bitch you know that

DAVE: i cant tell if you dont want us to run or are reverse psychology mindfucking us into running

DIRK: Does it matter?

DAVE: i guess not

DAVE: not like i can just stand around and wait for president crocker to like

DAVE: write fucking grammar laws into the constitution

DIRK: Good.

DIRK: That’s a heroic attitude to have, which I’m pleased to hear. Even if your plan is stupid, which it is, and even if Karkat would be an atrocious president, which he would.

DAVE: nuh uh

DIRK: Sorry to cut this short, but diapers are starting to come down pretty hard right now, and some of them haven’t even had their babies removed.

DAVE: what

DIRK: That was a joke.

DIRK: Goodbye, Dave.

DIRK: Sorry for the momentary diversion, Jake. Now where were we?

JAKE: Momentary??? Gadzooks man you were on the phone for half a friggin hour!

JAKE: I know you like to get the crowd all hot and bothered but we are supposed to be professionals here!

DIRK: You’re right, my bad. Won’t happen again.

DIRK: How about you kick off the next round?

DIRK: I bet this crowd will settle its shit right down the moment you drop the latest rhymes you’ve been tinkering with.

DIRK: You know the ones.

JAKE: Gasp.

JAKE: You dont mean...

DIRK: Oh. But I DO.

JAKE: Tally ho its me, jake mcgee!

JAKE: Popping my pistols off, two shots and a kiss

JAKE: My aim is tops, i never miss

JAKE: One shot to the heart and the other to your lips

JAKE: Im heedless

JAKE: You cant impede this

JAKE: While these cads are all hat and very little cattle

JAKE: Cattle so weak one fears they might be feedless!

JAKE: As i prattle and digress you try to make your egress

JAKE: In the middle of the battle, but surely ye jest?

JAKE: FIDDLE FADDLE!

JAKE: My rhymes are known to bring the rattle

JAKE: I rattle those bones right down to the bit

JAKE: Im a mellifluous old chap who knows how to take a hit

JAKE: Im the tip...

JAKE: Tip top of the morning!

JAKE: A rip roaring halt to your snoring

JAKE: Like pouring butter on bacon

JAKE: Their hunger awakens!

JAKE: All the rascally scalawags

JAKE: And dastardly jackanapes

JAKE: Always ask of me, mate what is shaking?

JAKE: With golden gas pipes such as jake-eng’s

JAKE: Im dodging their shade and ducking their jape-slings

JAKE: While my rump stokes a thirst that my rhymes have been slaking!

JAKE: When the splendid lads and ladies ask me “how do you do?” i -

DIRK: Whoops. Jake, sorry to cut you off...

DIRK: Looks like I’m getting another call. Really need to take this one.

DIRK: Gonna have to wrap this battle up sooner than scheduled.

DIRK: Yo Rose, what’s up?

[blazeismyname]

AUGH YOU JUST KEEP FUELING MY SILLY HYPERFIXATION.

BEFORE I GET INTO MORE! I ANNA SAY THAT I KINDA WANT TO WRITE THIS? IM SETTNG A DEADLINE FOR A DIFFERENT STORY AND IF I CAN GET IT IN BY THEN THEN ILL DEF WRITE THIS!!!

So, without further ado, in order of your points, tome for hyperfixation rants

Yeye, Gaston proposing! Like, at least in the musical (again, bringing that up), he makes it a whole entire REALLY awkward song. Like, full on him telling Belle he's gonna make her a housewife with a bunch of children who are gonna all be boys. I think for Marius, it'll be a million times more tame because bad at villain + basic respect. And, consider, Brian following it with "Take a piss fuck boy". And Carmilla would definitely be so proud when she finds out. Probably from remark from Marius after hes over Brian like "Rmemebr when you told me to take the piss and called me a fuck boy?"

Yeah, I was thinking about the entire getting Camrilla committed thing. Doesn't really fitt.... umm, I'm trying to remember what Belle sees in the mirror during the play. I think it's him running through the woods to find her himself? So maybe Carmilla just doesn't return after that and then isn't able to thus calm the crowd?

SO MY WHOLE THING WITH NASTYA AND CAMILLLA!!!! My whole idea was that Carmilla was watching from some upstairs window, and Nastya like, pretends to cast a spell and throws out some sort of like, finally crushed bone glitter while Carmilla actually does the spell.

Oh, no doubt Marius played the violin. I think that EVERYONE pitched in. Lumim (Lumiere Tim) was strumming a damn guitar with his candlestick hands or something-

AND YES!!! THEY NEED A MONTH!!! I was ignoring the whole few days thing and was just acting like it'd be a good amount of time because I firmly believe with these two, a lot more time is gonna be needed.

TS PROMPTLY KNOCKING MARIUS OUT IS SO FUNNY- What if the "safe" place is Carmilla and Brian's house LMAO-

SLAMS MY FIST AGAINST THE TABLE. TS NOT BEING NOTICABLE SINCE IT'S LITERALLY A FUCKING TOY SOLDIER IS SO GENUIS I A POLIETLY SHAKING YOU AROUND LIKE A RAGGEDY DOG TOY OF A DUCK /POS/POS/POS

THEM FIGHTING IN THE RAIN OYGH! ESPECIALLY IF ITS SUPER STORMY AND BRIAN KNOWS HOW JONNY FEELS ABOUT STORMS QND IS FREAK8NG OUT LIKE "He's probably so scared... AND GOING TO DIE! MARIUS! TIM- WHOEVER!"

AND MARIUS SOBBING- ugh- I can just- ugh- he's scared and upset and worried, and TS isn't listening until it freezes, and he's sees the expression on its face and then sobs into TS... and TS end up hugging back as Brian dashes with Jonny in his arms, also sobbing his eyes out

Creature Jonny will always win. It's a creature, Jonny. For the symbolism, he gets a brief moment of male patterned baldness and half his hair falls out but he grows it out again eventually. And Brian is all for it (if not teasing Jonny a little after Jonny looses some hair) (JONNY KNEELING ON THE GROUND, HOLDING THE FALLEN HAIR, SHOUTING AT THE FUCKING OUTER GODS BECAUSE HE VERY MUCH WANTED TO STAY HAIRY, KEEPS HIM AND HIS BF NICE AND WARM!!!)

The bookkeep being blind is.. AGH, I love it so much. AND TH PARALLELS TO FRAKENSTEIN. LISTEN, I MAY HAVE ONLY WATCHED ANALYSIS THAT WENT THROUGH THE PLOT, BUT I STILL UNDERSTAND IT AND I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOURE DOING AND ITS MAKING ME SO HAPPY AUTISM RIGHT NOW, YOU LITERALLY DONT UNDERSTAND

To explain further what the wind-up key was, it was supposed to show how short time was turning on the rose to the point where Clocksworth was one sentience removal from being a clock. Thus, this would stress Lyf out MONUMENTALLY because he literally doesn't know if he'll be alive from one second to the next. I don't think Marius would immediately be able to understand what the wind-up key is and why it's upsetting Lyyf, but he would know that he cares about the clock dude and needs to comfort him.

Purring Jonny was considered, I was just withholding it for a later date. Glad to know you're in my mind. BUT YES. AND THERE HAS TO BE SOME SILLY SCENE WHERE BRIAN HEARS IT AND JUST IS LIKE "shit, that's cute"

OH MY JON, AND THE CASTLE FELING IT. LIKE, AURORA IS SO UPSET BECAUSE THIS IS SOMEONE SHE KNOWS AND JONNYIS BITTER ABD PISSED FOR PICKING A FLOWER OR SOMETHING AND THEN SHE HEARS THE DESPERATE CRIWS OF A SON AND IS JUST COMPETELY JUST, SAD AND SLIGHTLY PISSED AT JONNY (she refuses to comfort him and help him through the castle till he genuinely says sorry). I imagine that Ashes is like, "You feel it too, right? She's not happy. Jonny really did it this time, " and Tim, Bertie, Lyf, Ivy, and Raph aren't up to their normal shenanigans and are all solemnly like "Yeah. We feel it".

EXTRA STUFF EVEN THOUGH THIS IS GOING ON LONG

"But he's-" "The most interesting boy in town! That makes him the best..."

BRIAN. SINGING. THE BEGINNINF SONG. AND LIKE, IN THE MOVIES AND STUFF THE OTHER VULLAGERS ARE SINGING BUT INSTEAD ITS JUST WHISPERS AND BRIAN IS SINGIN AND DOING HIS THING

The 3 ladies swooning over Gaston have to make it in. I don't care who. I don't care how. I just think that Marius either hired them to be his ego boost or dated them and they're not over him. I just think it'd be funny

Anyways, this took like an hour, and I started watching Beauty and the Beast, so I can kinda be a little more versed, but I forgot sk I gotta get back to that... and also, no nap for me cause of this silly hyperfixation- bye

Beauty and the Beast, but it's the Mechanisms.

Jonny must be the beast because feral Jonny and the whole heart thing... prove me wrong.

Tim or Brian is Belle.

Rest of the Mechs are the servants in the Beast's house. With an exception for Marius as Gaston cause I can totally fucking see it. He would suck at it though because it's Marius. And also, short Marius HC.

This is probably not new. But it's been brewing in my head for a good few months, ever since I put my Mechs OC in the iconic Belle dress.

[mod-casey]

HOW HE'D MEET YOU ! arataki itto x male reader

notes: reader is a dude bcuz im a gay man that likes itto and theres not enough male readers so fuck u ill do it myself ig 😈 also this isnt proof read, eng isnt my first language, and i did this in like 2 hours pls dont kill me lmao 💀 OH AND THIS ISNT A STORY, ITS A STORY IN HEADCANON FORM 😭 i legitimately suck at writing stories in story form so have this half assed thing instead 😓

warnings: cursing, blood, injuries & violence. (but its all very brief, not detailed, and not severe so dw)

arataki itto doesnt actually have a label for himself. hes never felt the need to do so, he just likes who he likes without much of a reason. if someone were to ask him which way he swings, he says: "i swing whichever way the wind will blow me to!"

you guys met through pure chance, and it was super cliche. as you were walking through the bustling streets of inazuma city after the disbanding of the vision hunt decree. he was also nearby, competing with the local children again.

after losing for the tenth time to the same child, he makes a loud groaning noise, which caught your attention (and the attention of everyone in a ten mile radius). while everyone else was looking at him with dislike, you were staring in pure interest, which he noticed.

his eyes widen as he looked at you. there was no way someone being so beautiful was legal, was there? he stared, and stared, and stared and st- "MISTER ITTO! HELLOOOO??"

one of the kids yelled, an annoyed look on his face as he just watched him stare at you for a good few seconds. itto finally snapped out of his trance, with a very clear blush on his face that he poorly tried to hide.

"oh uh- my bad, kid! was just a little tired- kind of spaced off for a little bit- but hey! im back on my A game, so lets go at it again!" he held out his closed fist, offering to play another round of rock, paper, scissors. the child bregudgingly accepted, knowing how this was going to end.

itto was hoping that he would win this time, specifically to impress the cute guy that was behind him. "rock, paper, scissors, shoot-!" the kid and itto chanted synanoumously, then revealed which of the three choices they picked at the shout of the last word.

itto held out a rock, and the young boy choose a paper. "DARN IT!" the oni yelled, once again catching the attention of everyone nearby. an adult all of a sudden snapped at him, condescendingly telling hin to stop bothering everyone, including the local kids.

"...did you really have to go and fight him?" you spoke as you patched up his wounds, caused by the tenryou commission trying to calm down the quirrel between the adult and itto. after they confronted the claymore user, he instantly started escalating the fight, straight up insulting them.

"well yeah! if they dare want to challenge arataki "the favorite of the kids" itto, then im gonna give 'em an ass whop- OW!" he winces as you dabble some alcohol solution to his face wound, caused by one of the tenryou guards punching him pretty hard.

"stop being a big baby, i've heard the stories of you and your adventures, you'll be fine." you spoke as you examined his wound, throwing away the cotton ball you used to clean his injuries, placing it on the top of the small bundle of blood red cotton balls next to you.

"yikes, thats probably gonna leave a bruise in the morning." you took a sharp breath in from sympathy for him, knowing its gonna hurt for awhile. "man, that sucks. i sleep on that side!" a small pout was put on his face as he complained. "don't worry, its not that bad, just some bruising and a bit of blood. it won't take that long to heal."

after a bit more checking, cleaning and bandaging, you finally stood up to stretch, while itto went to check out what he looked like with all the gauzes around most his wounds. "hm! i kinda like it." itto adjusted his hair a little while looking into his reflection, noticing a few hairs out of place. "kinda gives me the "badass, fighter boy" vibe."

after a long yawn, you looked at him to see what he was talking about. "woah- yeah you're kinda right." you nodded at the sight of your hard work. "right? anyways- sorry that you had to be the one to patch me up. my gang usually does it, but i gave the boys the day to rest since we didn't have anything to do today. my bad!" he gives a little nervous chuckle, shrugging his shoulders.

you smiled at him. "its fine, i don't really mind. i have some experience from needing to heal the other people in my adventure team, so its best i did it." a look of shock was suddenly on the other mans face. "woah- you have an adventure team?" "yup, we do alot of stuff all around teyvat. commissions, important bounties, peoples requests, all that stuff." "cool! if you ever need any help with missions, call my gang up! consider it compensation for the healing." he gave you a cheesy wink, which did make you laugh a bit.

"ill consider it, itto." was all you said, before you realize that your team was probably waiting for you, which made you quickly gather up your (somewhat) used first aid kit. you bid adieu to the oni very quickly, not even waiting for a response before heading back off to inazuma city to find your teammates.

"see you around, pretty boy!" he shouted while he watched you run away from his prephiral vision. it made him a little upset to know he couldn't banter with you anymore, but he knew that he would see you soon.

itto also starts to pack up his things, and head home to the camp his gang was staying at. he was excited to tell them about you, but after a bit of thinking, the oni decided to hold off on it for a little. when he sees you again, he'll definitely be sure to get you as a new recruit for the gang, and introduce you to them by then.