#i need out i need out i need out
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Am I truly at the end of my rope with how this situation has taken all my energy or is it just 3AM
#i just want to cry#i want T to let me cry#for my own sadness#not for some sad scene on youtube#i need out i need out i need out#i am tired and that's why#i can't cut myself i can't cut myself
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Would like to no longer work not in a “lazy and wanting handouts” way but in a “most companies would chew me up and spit me out if it benefitted them and I don’t think I can live with that for another 40+ years” way.
#that’s right fuckers I am once again complaining about my job !!!!!!#I’ve applied for 10 jobs in the last 6 months and gotten an interview at exactly zero of them#so I’m stuck at my entry level job that does not pay me enough to most out of my parents house#where the vibes are rancid and I’m overworked and there’s no upward mobility and I’m going to kms !!!!!!!!#i need out I need out I need out
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ahaha . more of family's getting increasingly bad health complications likely from just living in this fucking house. Haha. Gets Scared
#🐠.txt#vent#i need out i need out i need out#i hate that i can't seem to get anywhere with my donation posts#begging on the internet does fucking nothing for me but i have nowhere else to go#i have no friends irl nor any friends online who live close enough to crash by or something#even then thats a temporary solution#i hate how cruel this country is#i hate how cruel this whole fucking planet is#i can't have anything#and my familys ''planning'' goes nowhere every time#and they usually just brush it off for another year or two#until something happens Again. and Again#currently half the planning is just buying more shit to ''make the current house better'' and complicate getting out even more#as if we're not living in a rotting biohazard#and im not allowed to make a gofundme or anything for whatever reason . they dont trust me with it but won't do it themselves#i hate it here!!!!!!!!!!!! i Really do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#i wish i could just move with a friend or partner but thats even more money#and i think id be insufferable to live with tbh#but thats genuinely the only solution i can think of anymore. im never gonna afford my own rent or food from th commissions i rarely recieve#i literally can't get a job#i can barely stand longer than a few minutes#i dont even have middle school education much less anything further than that#i feel like im just doomed to sit here til i die
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I've been seeing a lot of knight posts recently. pretty great
#i really do agree we need a kneeling knight emoji i'd use the FUCK out of that#can i tag this 'chivalry' or perhaps 'arthuriana'#shann talks shit#chivalry#arthuriana#maybe even#paladin#edit: thanks to the people reblogging this i now know of knightposting#knightposting#second edit: listen I didn’t hv an oc in mind when I compiled this but I just remembered that I do hv a knight oc#morghen coded#compilation post
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it’s cheaper to buy vegetables here
#robot alchemic drive#I CANT FIND THE OG POST FOR THE LIFE OF ME it’s like it got vaporized out of existence ???#and i needed this on my blog again. i just needed it#my posts
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since spotify wrapped is coming today i just want to bring awareness to the fact that around 86% of the songs on spotify are currently demonetized since spotify decided that tracks with under 1,000 cannot be monetized. not only that the ceo of spotify cashed out $35.8 million dollars in spotify shares in the third quarter of the year and it has been reported that he earns more than the top artists on the platform.
for a platform that claims to support artists, this is outrageous and i hope people realize that an artist who is starting out, cannot make a living out of spotify streams simply because daniel ek and his friends made it worse for the artists trying to start a career. if you wanna support musicians and the possibility for them to get a living wage please follow United Musicians and Allied Workers (UMAW) which are trying to make The Living Wage for Musicians Act a reality so musicians can be paid fairly through streaming platforms and get the cut they deserve.
#this is a daniel ek hate blog btw#i thought this was important#bc this isn't talked about enough#i found out about umaw this year#and truly we need unions for musicians#that fight for more rights and fair pay#spotify#spotify wrapped
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Something something, living rent free in my mind and such, anyway I love them.
#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool#wade wilson#wolverine#logan howlett#poolverine#deadclaws#mcu#gosh I really need to find a good style to draw them#I drew wolverine's face FOUR times cuz I hated the way it looked hhhh#this movie took Hugh Jackman out of one of the boxes in my head and put him in a spinning wheel right in the middle of my brain#my art
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I’m just so fucking pissed off man if they can surgically airstrike international volunteer food workers three consecutive times to ensure their operation is wiped out completely what the fuck is left for anyone to say
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Please note. The orange one is not included because A. He isn’t a billionaire. And B. Calling him obnoxious is too kind for him.
#billionaire#rich people#Elon would just be insufferable#just the worst case of “needs to be the smartest kid in the room syndrome ever#I feel Zuckerberg has actually worked on himself a lot lately and he would be reasonably chill to hang out with#still evil#but he doesn’t come across as insecure alien anymore#bezos also seems like he’d actually be a cool guy to hang out with#again. still super evil#but I think I could survive a few hours stuck with him without bludgeoning myself to death
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Katniss is such an unreliable narrator. She says "Then something unexpected happens. At least, I don't expect it because I don't think of District 12 as a place that cares about me" girl you deliver strawberries to the Mayor, you hunt and trade for the district, when you fell at Prim being chosen someone caught you, when you went to Prim people parted for you, when you volunteered EVERYONE stopped. Idk how to tell you but I think you're a pillar of the community.
#katniss everdeen#the hunger games trilogy#the hunger games#primrose everdeen#hunger games#batcavescolony reads the hunger games#suzanne collins#'now it seems i have become someone precious' NOW? GIRL BFFR you're their hunter girl#and this isn't negative just bffr girl#your WHOLE DISTRICT did the three finger salute that you yourself says means admiration thanks and goodbye to someone you love and on top is#old a rarely used. your WHOLE DISTRICT decided in that moment that they needed to bring back this sign of respect for YOU#...................................................................#idk why some people are thinking i mean this as negative i don't she is unreliable but its not intentional. like when Peeta heart stoped in#CF she doesn't know what Finnick is doing at first cus she doesn't know off the top of her head what cpr is. she also thinks Peeta after the#reaping is acting for the cameras. he isnt we dind out later his mom basically told him Katniss was gonna win and he would die. obviously#shes not doing it on purpose shes just for lack of better words uneducated? as in she doesn't know everything shes not omnipotent#so when Plutarch (? second games guy) shows her his mokingjay hiden watch shes like *wtf that's weird?* then the people traveling to#district 13 show her the mockingjay cookie and explains it and she then goes on the difference between his watch and their cookie#and why does eveyone act as if district 12 is as bad as the capital? they CANT help Katniss and Prim in the way you want. they cant give#them food. none of them have any! and im not putting iton Katniss but they hid they needed food so they could stay together. it sounds like#some of you are in this our world mentally of what people do after a loved one dies (brings food constantly checks on them etc) district 12#cant do that. they dont have food and they're all suffering. you cant give someone food when you have none to give. then theirs the fact#that peeta DID help. Peeta buring the bread and tossing some to her then taking a beating from his mom is a HUGE thing in the books.#he used his resources to help her like you all said someone should.#district 12 DID (rip) care about Katniss before the hunger games. why do you think she was allowed to hunt? or how her trades were good#these are the little ways 12 can shows Katniss they love her. but again Katniss doesn't see this and YES its because she had ptsd before the#hunger games as well. i swear some of you make it seem like d12 was all living a life of luxury and glaring down at Katniss.#other things that show Katniss is in hight standing with at least her people of d12 is her dad was known enough through d12 for peeta dad to#comment on his singing along with his commenting on her mom. also her mom is a healer in the community. yeah her parents arnt the top but#of d12 but they are/were definitely high staning in the Seam.
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my dead goth son and his friendly neighborhood personified concept of insanity
#really happy with how michael turned out :] i might stick to this design#rapunzel ah glowy hair <3#i do need to workshop gerry though orz#have been working on this during breaks from my other projects and god it took way too long to finish#fun fact the final file for this is over 2gb 👍 forgot i was recording the timelapse#i could post it if anyone would be interested#the magnus archives#tma#michael distortion#michael shelley#tma michael#tma distortion#gerard keay#gerry keay#tma gerry#gerrymichael#doorkeay#technically? i’m not one to draw ship art usually but this one’s close enough i think#tma fanart#fanart#my art#digital art#illustration#magpod
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Posting on AO3 is like, I'm doing this for myself, but also immediately refreshing the page every 5 seconds to see if you get any hits comments or kudos. But totally only writing for me.
#ao3#I legit have fics I just never posted an only wrote for myselft#then decide to share#and just all composure goes out the window#I need to have that feedback#I can't be on any social media but tumblr for this reason
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Dick (Nightwing) and Jason (Robin) stare at Bruce. One sports pleading eyes, the other a shit eating grin. There’s a child between them with black hair and blue eyes.
Bruce, he doesn’t know what’s happening but he doesn’t like it: No.
Dick, grinning: He’s our younger brother now.
Jason, nodding seriously: You’re not gonna take him from us.
Tim, got kidnapped while taking photos of patrol, just happy to be there: Where’s the Batcave?
Bruce: what.
Dick, grinning wider: He’s ours now.
#batman#dc comics#kid!tim#I love those fics#they need to make Nightwing a little more unhinged tho#like I would expect both Jason and Dick to hate each other until they find a common enemy (Bruce)#and annoy the shit out of him#or until they find stalker Timothy Drake following them are met with a bought of brotherly concern so strong they don’t even blink an ey#they don’t even care when tim accidentally calls them by their civilian name#they just look at each other and kidnap him#Tim’s just along for the ride#he gets to swing with them through Gotham (so cool!!) and ride nightwings motorbike!!! and see the batcave!!!#little eight year old Tim’s dream come true#tim Drake#Jason Todd#dick Grayson#Robin#Nightwing#bruce wayne#batfamily#batfam#mine
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also worth noting that "abusive" doesn't actually mean "irredeemable" either.
there's a lot of people that have done things in the past that were bad, because they weren't taught any better, or they were in an overall toxic situation where EVERYONE was shitty (like a cult), or they were just at an especially low point and hurt others for it.
you don't have to forgive them. you don't have to ever speak to them again. you can be angry with them until you die if you want.
but society cannot function if we don't allow them to move on. to change their behavior and fuck off somewhere else and build meaningful relationships without bothering you again. we need a path for people to change, or nothing ever will.
#like re: the last post#npd SHOULDNT mean 'youre an abusive person'#but also people who have abused people in the past can still become better people in the present#you know?#and as i metioned vaguely in that post. the way we currently treat people with NPD probably CAUSES THEM to lash out at and abuse others#if u abuse someone they lash back out at you and suddenly theres fun mutual abuse happening#so they need a way out of that cycle
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im sorry but i cannot stop thinking about isha's pastel memories that play during her sacrifice scene.
look at how full of colour this beautiful fuckin shot is:
it's been well established in episodes 4-6 how grim and dark the undercity has become under cait and ambessa's new rule. but look at how isha sees/remembers it - because of jinx.
jinx, who went through a severe childhood trauma that has carried over into her present self - she covers extremely destructive weapons and grenades in bright pinks and blues, neons, childlike doodles, graffiti. (joy and destruction, powder and jinx, a contrast so striking it becomes like a signature for her).
and then we see the world through isha's eyes. when we meet her in episode 2, she's running through sewers, from goons dressed in black; it's grimy and grim. and then all of her recent memories are done in these childlike pastel, almost crayon-y sketches. because what isha saw was jinx covering a dark and grim world in colours.
and so isha covered her world in colour, too.
because jinx made her world bright.
isha looked at jinx and saw the child in her. she saw powder and she saw jinx. she saw joy and destruction. and that's why jinx gave isha so much hope. isha knew the world was grim and dark - but then she watched jinx, and she learned that you can paint over all that grim darkness with neon blue spray paint.
that's why isha believed in hope. that's why in her final moments - in a scene that is lit dimly and dramatically - she sees nothing but a bright world coloured in pastels.
never underestimate the hope of a child.
#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane s2#my post#arcane s2 spoilers#arcane season 2#arcane season 2 spoilers#sry tagging the shit out of this i dont wanna ruin the scene for anyone#jinx arcane#jinx and isha#isha arcane#jinx#god i just.#the thing about jinx's trauma that has been so poignant up until now being the exact thing that isha needed!!!#a child seeing the childlike behaviors of an adult and seeing it not as trauma but as bravery and hope#and it's WHY jinx has become this unwilling symbol of hope for the undercity. bc they *also* see her covering a dark world in colour#anyways.#i could say more and maybe i will later but. yeah#jinx made isha's world bright. im gonna be SICK
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wanted to get this idea out of my head before i move on to other things aye🤙
#mouthwashing#fanart#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#daisuke mouthwashing#swansea mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#this was supposed to be a quick thing#it got a bit out of hand :“)#i desperately need to do some colour studies bc good lord i struggled here
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