#i need more fics discussing their relationship
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The VIP Booth | Vander Smut Oneshot đ«đ€
(Gif creds: me <3)
Pairings: Husband!Vander x Wife!Reader
Pronouns: Fem!Pronouns
Rating: NSFW, 18+, MDNI !! You WILL be blocked! đ€ș
Word Count: 3.1k (whoops. got carried away with storybuilding)
Tags: Cunnilingus, Fingering, Face Fucking, Finger Sucking, Hair Pulling, Semi-Public Sexual Acts, Established Relationship, etc.
Summary: You coax your husband into eating you out in the only private area The Last Drop has to offer.
Notes: AAAA!! Idk if this idea is ANY GOOD but it came to me in a moment of delusion. The last bit was probably a little rushed, too. SORRYYYY. Iâll make it up to yall later.
Also, tell me Iâm wrong when I say that Vander will go to any length to eat some pussy. Do it, cowards. I dare you. YOU KNOW JUST AS WELL AS I DO THAT THIS MAN WOULD HAPPILY DIE WITH HIS FACE IN BETWEEN A PAIR OF THIGHS.
Asks/Request fics are coming soon, as well as a few more special treats for yâall!! Enjoy, my lovelies, & stay tuned. đ€
(I can see you, minors!! Get outta here đ€șđ€ș. BACK! BACK, I SAY!)
Inside the walls of The Last Drop, there was one booth unlike any otherâa private, exclusive spot tucked away behind the bustling central room. It was a booth reserved for those willing to pay for top-tier service, offering a secluded escape from the usual chaos of the barâs environment. But as co-owner of The Last Dropâand wife to the main ownerâyou didnât need to fork out any cash to reserve it. Especially not on a night like this. Noâtonight, luck was on your side. The booth had gone unclaimed by any paying customer.
Truthfully, the undeniably significant feature were its curtains. The enormous maroon tapestries that enveloped the entrance ensured complete privacy, shielding it from prying eyes. After all, thatâs what made it the VIP boothâan oasis of solitude amidst the drunken chaos of the crowd.
With the booth left unreserved, its privacy ensuring a rare moment of seclusion, and the crowd blissfully distracted by their own drunken revelry, the opportunity was simply too perfect to pass up. You had concocted a devilish planâone that had been simmering in your mind all night. It wasnât just about messing with your husbandâit was about messing around with him.
Your overwhelming desire for your husband was impossible to ignore on any given day, but tonight, it seemed even more intenseâan insatiable hunger that gnawed at you, its cause elusive and beyond your comprehension. Whatever the reason, it gripped you with a force you couldn't obstruct, leaving you restless and consumed by pure unadulterated lust.
This, naturally, allowed your plan to unfold effortlessly, as if guided by an invisible hand, bringing it closer to fruition.
To carry out your devious plan, you had carefully cultivated the trust of one of the few individuals who worked for you and Vander. They werenât exactly employees in the traditional sense, but rather a handful of people you kept on the fringes, offering a few coins in exchange for their occasional assistance. Their loyalty was fleeting, bought with small tokens, but it was enough to serve your purpose. Especially in a moment such as this. A seemingly crucial oneâat that.
You kept things vague, framing your request as though it were purely concerning a business discussion needing to be had. You asked your employee to discreetly inform your husband that someone was calling him from behind the velvet curtains of the VIP booth. You also made it clear that the employee should mirror your discretion, avoiding any mention of your name or your connection to him.
The employee appeared curious, even somewhat uneasy, at first. That was, however, prior to you slipping a generous cash bonus their way, eliciting their cooperation without room for protest.
"Go on, please," you plead with your unsuspecting employee, your voice laced with a blend of urgency and excitement. "But rememberâdonât tell him itâs me."
As the employee slips into the bustling crowd, you struggle to contain the surge of excitement building within you, all while fighting to maintain a sultryâyet composed, demeanor. You adjust your hair, breasts, and clothing, making subtle moves to enhance your allure and mystery. Every gesture is deliberate, designed to keep you as collected and captivating as possible, cultivating an air of intrigue about you as you desperately await the arrival of your beloved husband.
They fulfilled your agreement as you waitedâapproaching their boss and informing him that someone had entered the VIP booth, insisting on speaking with him directly.
"VIP booth? Thought nobody booked it tonight," Vander remarks, raising an eyebrow and crossing his arms over his chest as he takes a moment to process the information. Normally, you were the one who handled the VIP booth, and heâd have gladly passed this task off to youâif the employee hadnât mentioned that the VIP âcustomerâ specifically requested Vander. Looks like heâd have to put on a more hospitable facade and give them what they wanted.
If only he knew just what this "customer" truly wanted from him.
After a series of grunts, groans, and huffs, Vander finally made his way to the booth. After forcing a welcoming smile onto his face, he slowly pushed aside the curtains.
"Sorry for the wait. You wanted to speak to the ownerâ"
His voice faltered, trailing off faster than it had taken him to summon the words.
You feel your own response threaten to catch in your throat, but you wonât cave. You abandon your nerves.
"Why yes, I did. Although..." you drawl, your tone laced with playful mischief, "...'speak' isnât exactly at the top of the list of things I want to do to the owner."
Your sultry gaze locks onto his, deliciously teasing. Vander, already an imposing figure, looms even larger from your vantage point in the booth. Seated as you are, you find yourself craning your neck significantly just to meet his eyes, the angle only amplifying his commanding presence.
A slew of unidentifiable emotions cross his face in a mere flash before fading into a singularlyâequally mischievous to yoursâ-expression.
âWell. Seeinâ as how you are the VIP patron of the night, how can I oblige you?â He queries, his eyebrow raising once more.
Your heart stutters beneath your breast as his expression shifts, his eyes darkening with a lust-filled intensity that sends a shiver through you. The chemistry between you two never failing to baffle you.
"...Serve me," you murmur, your voice soft yet determined to keep the air thick with seduction.
"And what, if I may be so bold to ask, can I serve you with?" he inquires, his voice dipping low, the provocative edge in his gaze unwavering.
"Your body." you quip, your voice steady despite the flutter of nerves stirring in your gut, desperate to make it quiver.
Vander eyes you carefully for a moment, savoring the way your confidence wavers. He deliberately toys with the knowledge of how easily he can unsettle you, his gaze lingering as if relishing every flicker of hesitation you try to hide. A smirk slowly spreads across his mouthâthe very one you ached forâhis eyes glinting with an all-knowing, deviously sexy twinge. He nods softly, his hand rising to casually caress his beard as he watches you, the tension thick in the air.
âMmhmm. I see," he murmurs, his tone laced with teasing amusement. "Who am I, if not a man willing to care for his loyal customers?" He phrases simply, the words carrying a heavy, unspoken promise before he moves, gracefully lowering himself to his knees across from you. Thereâs a moment of silence, the air thick with anticipation, before he slowly begins to push himself beneath the table that had kept you both apart.
You donât dare look beneath the table, almost afraid to meet his gaze at this moment, unsure of what you might see on his face now that the situation has shifted. The tension coils tighter, each passing second amplifying the anticipation that overwhelmed your senses.
You practically jump at the brush of his shoulders against your shins as he crawls to them, the rush of anticipation making every nerve in your body jolt. The aching desperation pulling through you draws attention to your core as you feel his strong hands gently caress your legs, the heat of his touch settling on your knees, sending a shiver through you. The way your teeth begin to tug at your bottom lip seemed like the only way you could physically process your eagerness.
Vander remains silent, his hands moving deliberately in opposite directions, the gesture designed to spread your legsâyet he did so with enough force to split you down the middle if he hadnât been careful enough. It isnât until he successfully parts them that he speaks again.
âNo bottoms? My. What a dirty girl you are, my dear customer. What if someone else had walked in here, hmm? Did you plan on flashing your bits to any bloke who popped his head in?â He teases, practically groaning some of his words, the guttural tone an unintentional yet instinctual reaction to the sight of you so bareâ-so clearly prepared for whatever scenario it was you anticipated happening in this little corner of the establishment.
It was obvious to your husband, from the way you were reacting, that the possibility of him crawling under the table to bury his face between your thighs hadnât even crossed your mind. The surprise and hesitation in your twitches and subtle movements told him everything he needed to know.
The distant, familiar chatter of real customers beyond the thin barrier tightened the knot in your stomach, throwing you into the reality of the moment. It became an unrelenting presence, grounding you in the tension that hung in the air. Meanwhile, the hot, damp breath of your husband seethed against the cold slickness seeping from your cunt, a stark contrast that deepened the unease coursing through you.
A shiver ran up your spine, your body trembling as nervous spasms raked through your bones when he edged even closerâhis hair grazing your skin in that familiar way you knew so well. It wasnât uncommon for your husband to spend most of his time down here, yet no matter how often it happened, the anxiety it stirred within you never waned.
You had an even harder time controlling how your body writhed as you felt the warmth of his tongue flush itself against your sopping heat. Your nails pressed into the soft wood of the table, digging in as you braced yourself, your body jerking. The spasms faltered for a moment, your body going rigid once he started violently lapping his tongue against your aching clit. The abrasing way his beard rubbed against the skin of your thighs sent you into a spiral.
You had expected him to fuck you directly on the table, to take you in the way you were used toâbut instead, he toyed with you from beneath it, the unanticipated choice leaving you bewildered. You had been aching for what felt like ages, the desperation almost unbearable. It was a struggle to keep your mouth from partingâyour head tilting back, eyes closing as your husband began to ease the tension that had gripped you for so long.
All you wanted was to whimper, to cry out for him, but you couldnâtânot with the patrons so close, just beyond the curtains. If he had only fucked you as youâd expected, he wouldâve easily pressed a hand over your mouth to keep you quiet, as he had in similar situations before. But this time, you knew he had chosen this path deliberately, testing whether you could hold your composure.
It was his unspoken way of making you atone for the ploy you used to get him here. He was a patient lover, understanding that even though you had pulled him away from his workâwhich he didnât mind as much as he let onâyou were just too eager to be patient. Always attuned to your needs, he was more than willing to satisfy the cravings of his most cherished wife, finding joy in fulfilling your desiresâno matter the time or place. The absence of his familiar presence behind the bar, and the slight potential for upsetting customers, felt like a small price to pay in exchange for the chance to fully indulge in you. To unravel and claim you in ways only he could.
His tongue was relentless. He sloppily sucked and licked at your needy clit, his nose rubbing against the mound of flesh above as he devoured you. His hands were as equally hungry as his mouth, and in need of something to grab. He manhandles your legs, draping them roughly over his shoulders, his fingers gripping at your plush thighs as he curls his arms around them. In doing so, he pulled you closer, your back slipping against the booth as he guided you down, drawing you nearer to him with a purposeful force. His cock was begging to be set free from its cloth prison as he sunk his tongue deep into the void of your cunt. The rhythmic, wet sounds became a melody more captivating than any song he'd ever heard, especially when paired with the soft mewls of you struggling to stay collectedâand most importantlyâsilent.
You can both hear and feel his laugh against you, a deep, low chuckle that carries a mix of arousal and amusement, vibrating through you with every huff. He found the way he could make you squirm incredibly sexy, the reaction sparking a deep sense of pride within him. There was something about the ease with which he could unsettle you that thrilled him, and he took great satisfaction in knowing how little effort it took. He knew all too well that it only took something as simple as a certain look to have you coming undoneâand right now, he was determined to make you come undone. All over his tongue.
Vander knows just how wild his fingers can make you on their ownâ yet especially so when paired with the mastery of his expertly quick and thoughtful tongue.
He wasted no time in combining the two, intent on making you crack under the pressure. While Vander didnât particularly want to be caught by patrons, eitherâor, for that matter, by one of your employeesâhis desire to make you scream was always his top priority.
He grips your thighs with more gusto than before, continuing to pull them further apart in hopes of expanding his âworkspaceâ. He releases one of them, the fingers of that hand moving to replace the tongue that was working its familiar magic inside you. He doesnât give you so much as a single moment to collect your thoughts as he makes the exchange, effortlessly ramming and curling two up into your cunt as his tongue continues its prior attack on your clit.
You swore you were seeing stars behind your eyelids, your grip on the table faltering just like your efforts to stay in control. You couldn't even attempt to cover your mouth, not with the relentlessâyet unintentionalâway your hands found their way under the table, tangling in his hair and gripping with enough force to pull some strands loose.
You greedily buck your hips down to meet the thrusting of his digits, pulling his head as far into your cunt as possible. He doesnât complain. He never would. Maybe it was his own type of preferred masochism, but heâd consider suffocating and perishing in between your legs in this way, a noble death.
Your toes ache from the force with which youâre curling them, your legs clutching and winding around his shoulders and neck like a python.
By now, you had abandoned all caution, hope, and effort to moan quietly. You were practically screaming over the deliciously knowing way he prodded his thick fingers into your cunt. He had long forgotten to move them in and out. He knew exactly what spot drove you mad, and he made his most conscious effort to curl them into it as rapidly and frequently as possible.
As much as Vander adored your cries, they were truly becoming far too loud. He really didnât want any curious folks to come wandering in to spoil the moment when you were so close to your inevitable peak. He has no choice but to silence you. With the hand that remained on your other thigh, he removed it from its resting place, reaching up from beneath the table as he gazes up at you. With a smirk against your cunt, and his eyes studying how your head was still thrown back against the booth, eyes shut tighter than a steel trapâ-he shoves two of his free fingers into your mouth. Your eyes shoot open. You look down at him, earning a wink from your husband as he smirks harder against your cunt. The eye contact was filthy, in the most erotic way possible. It always made you feel slightly awkward, in an oddly arousing way, when you made such a type of contact with him in the heat of a moment like this.
You willingly sucked on his fingers, now understanding the purpose for his actions after a thoughtful moment. He groans against your cunt, luckily the sound being muffled by how much his mouth was buried into it. Your tongue swirls itself rapaciously around the digits, drool falling from your mouth as you did so. Vander simply canât tear his eyes away from such a sight. He groans more as you lower your own gaze, your expression deadly with seduction. He was almost pissy that both of his hands were occupied at the moment. He was anxious to palm at his cock, desperate to find friction of his own now.
His tongue and lips were still working their relentless job on your clit, suckling every few seconds amidst the slurping. The way his facial hair brushes against it every now and then almost sends you into hystericsâbordering on a full blown frenzy.
Your legs are quaking, twitching and spasming with every harsh lick to your clit. It was so sensitive, you couldnât help how it shocked your nerves, causing them all to fire simultaneously. Electricity burned in your veins, desperate to chase your orgasm as it made your hips flick against his mouth faster than he could lap at you.
Your orgasm burrowed itself into the pit of your stomach, commanding you to follow it down to your cunt.
It didnât take much longer for you to keel over the edge of your impending climax. It burst through you, your legs clamping shut around his faceâa move which Vander was used to by nowâ-hips mindlessly gyrating against his face as you brutally cum around his fingers. Vander can feel your walls clenching and relaxing back to back with each additional thrust he gave, your voice begging to slip past his fingers as you come undone. He thought you had been dripping wet at the start of thisâbut he had been sorely mistaken. Your arousal was seeping out of you despite his fingers plugging you up.
âAttagirl..â He whispers against you, giving your clit a few final licks before reluctantly pulling away. The grip on his hair finally loosened as your body went almost completely limp. Your breathing came in rapid, shallow gasps, just as desperate as Vander, himself, now was. His cock was so hard, it felt like it was being choked by his trousers. But he had the patience of a saint. He could wait as long as needed for you to collect yourself once again.
âSo, was the service to your liking?â he asks, his tone teasingâand entirely rhetoricalâas he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. The fingers that had been in your mouth slide free as he takes a moment to compose himself.
âIâll take that as a yes,â he chuckles, clearly amused by how speechless youâve become.
âJust donât forget to tip your server..â He teases, alluding to the painfully obvious fact, that this situation is far from over.
#arcane smut#arcane x reader#arcane#vander x reader#arcane imagine#arcane x reader smut#vander arcane#vander x reader arcane#vander x reader smut#Vander smut#Vander smut imagine#Vander x reader imagine smut#Vander smut Drabble#Vander x reader smut oneshot
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In the mood for...
Nov 28th
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1. Hi, thank you for all that you do!! I'm itmf wangxian fics where LWJ is going through qi deviation and WWX is angsting about how to save him. Any timeline, AU, whatever. @thegertie
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2. itmf some meddling juniors! wangxian main couple please, rather getting together but will read established, modern au or canon era, all good :)
đ The Absolutely True Story of the Yiling Patriarch: A Manifesto in Many Parts by aubreyli (T, 19k, WangXian, In-Universe RPF, Romance Novel, LJYâs sense of justice, OYZZâs sense of romance, Featuring a surprise appearance by WWXâs oft-absent sense of shame, Look the ducklings just want their sort-of dads to be happy okay?, And itâs not like WWX or LWJ are doing a good job of ensuring their own happiness, LJY rejects canon reality and substitutes his own, highly relatable actually, Post-Canon Fix-It, primarily drama-canon with cameos from novel-canon, The Absolutely True Story of the Yiling Patriarch: A Manifesto in Many Parts by aubreyli [Podfic] by Rhea314 (Rhea))
A Dramatic Reading by pupeez4eva (Not Rated, 5k, WangXian, Humor, Post-Canon, Public Confessions, oblivious wangxian, The Juniors accidentally write Wangxian fanfiction on a cursed scroll, Everyone suffers the consquences, Getting Together)
not unspectacular things by taizi (T, 14k, WangXian, The Parent Trap Fusion, Unconventional Families, Adopted Children, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Getting Back Together, Happy Ending, the kids are alright, Families of Choice, Modern AU, Meddling Kids, Unreliable Narrator, Good Sibling JC, Protective NHS, One Big Happy Family, POV Third Person Limited)
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3. hello! recently read a couple fics where wwx turns into a kid (specifically around the time he was on the streets) and others have to look after him for a while, would anyone have more recommendations? i read be the first to see the spring and one other i canât remember but iâd love any recs
â€ïž grow by cafecliche (T, 14k, WangXian, Age Regression/De-Aging, Character Study, Post-Canon, [Podfic] Grow by jellyfishfire)
home is where we are by halfdemonvash (T, 17k, wangxian, JC & WWX, Twin Prides of YĂșnmĂšng are Bad at Communicating, JC & WWX Reconciliation, but only somewhat because these these things take time, Age Regression/De-Aging, Angst and Feels, Hijinks & Shenanigans, accidental baby acquisition but itâs actually your older brother, references to wwxâs past being homeless, and also his past food insecurity, rated T for jiang chengâs language, and light sexual content in the beginning, Post-Canon, YĂșnmĂšng Siblings Feels, Junior Trio Shenanigans)
found your writing on my wall by howodd5ever (T, 25k, WangXian, Accidental Baby Acquisition, De-aged WWX, Post-Canon, Getting Together, jl makes an appearance, lsz best boy, Referenced Child Neglect, discussion of parental loss, child food insecurity, Case Fic, Kind Of, Nightmares)
Rewritten by yamadori (Katsumi27) (G, 6k, WangXian, Age Regression/De-Aging, Emotional Hurt/Comfort)
sugar stains by lanjingyeet (T, 18k, WangXian, Kid Fic, (kind of), General Shenanigans, Spirits, questionable parenting, junior trio on babysitting duty, Age Regression/De-Aging, Child WWX)
Glimpses Of The Past by A_simple_Cookie, GoschateWabn (G, 52k, WangXian, WIP, Age Regression/De-Aging, Good Sibling JC, YLLZ WWX, Young WWX, Childhood Memories, Fluff and Angst, Twin Prides of Yunmeng Feels, Twin Prides of Yunmeng Dynamics, LWJ Has a Yiling Laozu Kink, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Humor, Family Bonding, Post-Canon, WWX Needs a Hug, Gremlin WWX, Hijinks & Shenanigans, beware WWX shenanigans inside) WWX regresses to all different ages in turn, so childhood, Cloud Recesses, Sunshot, YLLZ etc
đđSilver & Gold by beeswaxing (E, 162k, wangxian, post-canon, fix-it, fluff & angst, hurt/comfort, de-aging, established relationship, non-sexual intimacy, cuddling & snuggling, BAMF WWX, horny teenagers, underage kissing)
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4. Hi! Thank you for all that you do. For ITMF I would like to know if someone has recommendations for fics with Nie Mingjue discovering his brother intelligence or more people realizing how smart Huaisang or his part in the whole plan against JGY. Thank you again. @anime-trash-parody
while covered in mud by merthurlin (T, 12k, NHS & WWX, NHS & NMJ, NHS & Wen remnants, mentioned wangxian, canon divergence, fix-it, NHS goes farming and Hates It)
This Time Around by KouriArashi (T, 83k, JGY & NHS, NHS & WWX, JGY & WWX, Time Travel Fix-It, Kid Fic, Families of Choice, Angst, Grief/Mourning, Politics, Class Issues, Past Child Abuse, Moral Ambiguity, Everybody Lives, Eventual Happy Ending)
A Future Family In A Broken Past by Hauntcats (T, 121k, wangxian, WWX & Wen Remnants, Jiang Family & WWX, WQ/MM, JYL/NHS, LXC/NMJ, Not JiÄng Family Friendly, Not Cultivation World Friendly, WWX Needs a Hug, Family Dynamics, What is a good family?, Fear of emotions does not excuse abuse, Not Jiang Clan Friendly, Angst with a Happy Ending, Time Travel fix-it, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, LXC needs a hug, Everyone Needs A Hug, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Not YZY Friendly)
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5. Itmf more like Ready for Blood On The Ground by mondengel. Just Lan Wanji not having the patience for everyoneâs shit after his Wei Yingâs death and either saying or doing something about it. Please please please @queenkittykat336
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6. itmf a fic where wwx only remembers lwj as the dorky shy kid but when they meet again after awhile he realises lwj grew up hot
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7. A) are there any fics where wwx is a mafia boss and lwj is his trophy wife (or partner whatever) and doesn't take shit from anyone? I also don't mind if it's the other way around (like lwj is the mafia boss)
B) fics with loads loads loads of angst I wanna cry
7B)
voicemail mementos by waywardwriter (T, 3k, WangXian, Major Character Death, Modern, Getting Together, Angst, Grief/Mourning, Closure) I'm someone who takes a LOT to make cry and I was sobbing by the end of this
to the act of making noise by words-writ-in-starlight (WordsWritInStarlight) (G, 19k, LSZ & LWJ, LSZ & WWX, WangXian, Grief/Mourning, Father-Son Relationship, inquiry, LSZ is the best of boys and I will not hear debate, Music, Angst, Fluff and Angst, Found Family, [Podfic] to the act of making noise by Ceewelsh, flamingwell, kisahawklin, Rionaa) and for extra tissue warning, check out the podfic version with music
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8. Speaking of zombie apocalypse that ive seem from the last ficfinder, do you know any apocalyptic setting fanfic where wwx dies because he's bitten?
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9. Hi, for Itmf are there any story where wwx brags about being really experienced in relationships only for being totally outmatched by lwj?
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10. Itmf fics where the juniors find out how WWX looked before he died. Thanks so much!
Is Your Old Body Considered a Halloween Costume? by The_peregrine_falcon (G, 3k, WangXian, WWX's original body, Junior quartet makes an appearance, LQR's blood pressure is going up, LWJ is chief cultivator, Fluff, Canon Compliant, Post-Canon)
little a-ying by byeollie (Not Rated, 16k, WangXian, Curses, Age Regression/De-Aging, Fluff, Babysitting, everyone has to look after a mischievous wwx, lqr has a heart, Established Relationship, Junior Trio Dynamics, Unreliable Narrator, Family Feels, Found Family, Kinda, yunmeng bros reconciliation, Post-Canon, Mild Hurt/Comfort)
Transcend by covalentbonds (not rated, 7k, WIP, WangXian, Post-Canon, Fluff and Humor, Smut, YLLZ WWX is prettiest fight me)
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11. Hello! Thank you for the last itmf. A) This time I'm in the mood for preferably longer fics (50k and above) that focus on either one of these characters: Nie Mingjue, Nie Huaisang, Jiang Cheng, Lan Xichen.
I would like to see if there are any fics that focus on their character development and/or their romantic lives. It can be them with another character from mdzs or even an OC character. Just no Reader and Y/N please.
B) And fics that have Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan as the main couple.
Thank you so much for all your recommendations and have a nice day! @broodyelii
11A)
you made a rebel of a careful man by bluecottontail (VOlympianlove), VOlympianlove (T, 64k, NieLan, WangXian, past XiYao, Grocery Store, Meet-Cute, Romance, fast burn, Single Parents, Dating, Fluff and Angst, Domestic Fluff, Self Confidence Issues, Love at First Sight, Modern AU, Marriage Proposal)
Flourish by cicisears (M, 130k, Xuansang, WangXian, QingLi,XiYao, NieLan, YaoSu, NSFW, ish, dicks are mentioned, as in dick sucking, Friends to Lovers, Secret Relationship, Closeted Character, closeted guy didn't know he was closeted, Angst and Fluff!, Found Family, Homophobia, Casual bed sharing, until it's not casual, Sexy times implied, Parent Death, Super Minor Character Death, College Life, Pining)
Thin Ice by Nie_Miso (E, 66k, WIP, WangXian, College/University, Football | Soccer Captain NMJ, Dual POV, Cheerleading Captain LXC, Wangxian progression, Rivals to Lovers, Slow Burn, Locker Room, bisexual awakening, Light Dom/sub, light question mark, Background WangXian)
only love can hurt like this by bluecottontail (VOlympianlove), VOlympianlove (T, 53k, NieLan, WangXian, XuanLi, XiYao, Crazy Rich Asians Fusion, Inspired by Crazy Rich Asians, Modern AU, Singapore, Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Cheating, negative xiyao relationship)
đThe Gold Lotus by The Bathhouse (Cleoptrix) (E, 61k, ChengSang, XiYao, ChengYao, JueNing, Wedding Planner, Modern AU, Fluff and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mutual Pining, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Bickering, Misunderstandings, miscommunications, POV Alternating, Chengyao is not endgame, Nonbinary NHS, Asexual NMJ, Morally Grey NHS, Morally-Grey LXC, speaking of, Cheating, but not really, JC Has Anxiety, JC Has a Panic Attack, JC has a Therapist, JC Gets a Hug, Slut Shaming, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Guilt, Platonic Sex, Spanking, Under-negotiated Kink, Massage, Affirmation as Punishment, Everyone is verse except for JC, bottom JC, Power Play, Light Dom/sub, Overstimulation, Edgeplay, Biting, Kink Discovery, Foot Fetish, Body Worship, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Face-Fucking, Cock Warming)
Unique in All the World by The_Storybooker (M, 58k, ChengSang, background XiYao, Modern AU, Aromantic NHS, Asexual JC, Consent, Relationship Negotiation, Compatibility, Friends to Lovers)
Flowers Over Boys by morichrome (T, 55k, XiCheng, Background WangXian, Background XuanLi)
đAudience of One by WinterDreams (T, 181k, XiCheng, WangXian, Implied MingYao, Modern AU, Celebrities, Inspired by 10 Things I Hate About You (1999), Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Singer LXC, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Needs A Hug, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Swearing, Slow Burn, Family Feels, Family Bonding, childhood crushes, past emotional abuse, Post-Betrayal, Venerated Triad Feels, Yunmeng Duo Feels, Nightmares, Fluff and Angst, hand holding, Babysitter Ä-QĂŹng, Domestic Fluff, SongXiao mentioned relationship, Soft XiCheng, Eventual Happy Ending)
11B)
Cloud 9 by Chokolateaddictz (E, 4k, XuanLi, Modern AU, Office Romance, Fluff, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Till it resolves, Other MDZS characters make appearances, Original Characters, The intricate politics of Old Family Money, Best boy JGY)
Aftermath by KouriArashi (T, 57k, XuanLi, WangXian, XiYao, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Everybody Lives, Romance, Developing Relationship, Family, Sibling Bonding, Light Angst, Politics, Attempted Sexual Assault, some murder on occasion)
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12. Hi! This is for ITMF. I want to read a "WWX falls first" Fic. To be honest, i dont know if i want to read "WWX falls first" Or " Mean LWJ" Fic. But considering the " Mean LWJ" Fic that i read mostly a "WWX falls first" Fic, i think i want a combination of that? Thanks! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername
Honesty is the Best Policy (Except if Youâre an Asshole)by piecrust (E, 22k, WangXian, Porn with Feelings, College/University)
đAs It Should Be by kuro (M, 36k, WangXian, Slow Burn, Arranged Marriage, Fluff and Angst, Miscommunication, Dubious Consent, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Siblings, Running Away, from your problems, as adults do, Eventual Fluff, Background Relationships)
How You Would Let Me Have You by longleggedgit (E, 15k, WangXian, XiQing, Arranged Marriage, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Divergence, First Time, The LXC/WQ is a "mutual beards" situation just FTR)
the river and the sea by sasamelons (T, 7k, WangXian, Soulmates, Arranged Marriage, Misunderstandings, Angst with a Happy Ending, Idiots in Love, Falling In Love, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Mutual Pining)
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13. Hello
Any fics that have Wen Ruohan and Wei Wuxian interacting. Preferably antagonistically/wrh underestimating wwx becuase of his status.
đPendulum by ShippersList (M, 69k, wangxian, graphic depicitions of violence, rape/non-con, underage, A/B/O, Canon Divergence, Non-Traditional A/B/O Dynamics, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Misunderstandings, Canon-Typical Violence, Spies & Secret Agents, Fake Character Death, Slow Burn, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, BAMF WWX, Attempted Sexual Assault, Canonical Character Death, Mutual Pining, Good JGY, Introspection, Self-Sacrificing WWX, Love Confessions, Protective LWJ, past child sexual abuse)
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14. A) Itmf: please rec me books set in end of the world/ apocalypse/ zombie (or infection) au. I read one zombie au recently and it was so damn good. Left me hungry for more. Anything above 60k is good.
B) Are there any longer than 50k fics where yzy isn't abusive/bad and is a normal parent without being ooc? I don't want it to be the focus, but a part of the fic? @constellation-dks
14A)
â€ïž A Corpse Called By Name by jaemyun (Not rated, 64k, WangXian, Zombie Apocalypse, Angst, Horror, Zombie WWX, Eventual Happy Ending, yunmeng trio, Eventual WangXian, WWX is dad material even in death, Humor, YLLZ but make him dead, A Corpse Called By Name by jaemyun [Podfic] by Miss Appellation (Lizeth)) Amazing story with Zombie Wei Ying, one of my favorites! Around 64k
Apocalypse AU Series by Anonymous (Not rated, 211k, WangXian, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Zombie Apocalypse, Mpreg, Heavy Angst, Dialogue Heavy, Childbirth, Background Relationships, Canon character deaths, Minor Character Death, Canon Compliant, Family Drama, Post-Apocalypse, Gun Violence, POV WWX, Minor HuaLian, Suicide Attempt, Suicidal Thoughts, Established WangXian, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Past Sexual Assault, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Parenthood, Married HuaLian, Everyone Has Issues, PTSD, Near Death Experiences, Memory Loss, Natural Disasters, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, Eventual Romance, Protective LWJ, Suicide, Violence, Rebuilding, Recovery, Family Fluff, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Baby LSZ, Engagement) zombie apocalypse, rather dark and explicit themes, angst especially for Wei Ying. Includes Xie Lian and Hua Cheng for company, people being at their worst and a bit of scheming Guangyao. Beware of warnings, but really interesting
When the Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation takes a week off by galaxy_in_your_eyes (T, 20k, WangXian, Modern Cultivation, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives, only those that deserve it, kind of fix-it, Zombie Apocalypse, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Attempt at Humor, POV Alternating, Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Gore, Mentions of Suicidal Thoughts, Brief Mentions of Cannibalism, Zombies, We donât see the Zombie Apocalypse, It happens behind closed doors, WWX in quarantine, Wangxian being Wangxian, Mentions of Smut, Established Relationship, Courtesy Names, local necromancer gets sick with the flu) Not REALLY the full on end-of-the-world Zombie apocalypse + shorter than the requester asked, but an amazing read with Wei Ying being sick and appreciated for veing the smartest person in the room
Android!LWJ by Winglesss (E, 22k, WangXian, Android LWJ, mechanic WWX, Burial Mounds, Temporary Mute Character, Mute LWJ, temporary disabled character, Disabled LWJ, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt LWJ, Mutual Pining, Falling In Love, Modern, Science Fiction, Robot/Human Relationships, Robots & Androids, Post-Apocalypse, Post-War, Scientist WWX, PWP, Porn with Feelings, Explicit Sexual Content, Anal Fingering, Multiple Orgasms, Forced Orgasm, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs) Another pretty cute but also shorter Android Lan Zhan au in a post-apocalypse setting, with smutty stuff in the second part
đ Long Road Home by ValiantBarnes (Cimila) (M, 58k, LSZ & WWX, SL & LSZ, SL/WWX, Zombie Apocalypse, Blood and Gore, Demonic Cultivation, Found Family, Falling In Love, Sign Language, Minor Character Death, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Developing Relationship, Modern Cultivation, Body Horror, Trauma, Healing, Road Trips) note, this is WWX raising A-Yuan during the zombie outbreak and then WWX/Song Lan, no characters appear
Darkness Before the Dawn by Selenay (E, 64k, wangxian, Zombie Apocalypse, Modern With Magic, Necromancer WWX, Reunions, toddler A-Yuan, There Was Only One Bed, There are zombies but not graphically horrific zombies, Angst with a Happy Ending, Find a home in the middle of an apocalpyse) Wangxian zombie outbreak story with full cast of characters
The Edge of Night by Hobbsy3 (M, 277k, WangXian, XuanLi, Modern AU, Zombie Apocalypse, YĂșnmĂšng Siblings Dynamics, Accidental Baby Acquisition During a Zombie Apocalypse, Junior Quartet, (except theyâre all babies), Angst with a Happy Ending, Minor Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Gore, Ensemble Cast, Worst Zombie Fighting Team Ever, Found Family)
đ when the sun goes out by travelingneuritis (E, 176k, WangXian, Modern Cultivation, tech cultivation, Necromancy, Angst with a Happy Ending, insecurity around adoption, Dad!WWX, dad!lwj, Grief/Mourning, Mistaken Identity, Mood Whiplash, Body Swap, sex tears!, Falling In Love, Consensual Somnophilia, apocalypse (localized), Smut, unrealistic sexual stamina, Flashbacks, Time Skips, Illustrations)
14B)
â€ïž And Time Is But a Paper Moon by sami (M, 138k, WangXian, XiChengQing, Time Travel, Fix-It, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Healing, Mental Health Issues, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Depression, BAMF WWX, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, BAMF JYL, Getting Together)
So Dear A Loss by Comfect (T, 89k, FengYuan, WangXian, Good Parent JFN, Good Parent YZY, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, No Fall of Lotus Pier, No Golden Core Transfer, Communication, Adopted Sibling Relationship, Fluff, Everyone Lives/Nobody dies)
đthe thing with feathers by RoseThorne (G, 43k, WangXian, Time Travel, Hurt/Comfort, Memory loss, Arranged marriage, Good Parent YZY, Good uncle LQR, Angst, Butterfly effect) I'd also recommend the thing with feathers although it falls slightly short of 50k at 43,231 words.
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15. Please gimme more fics like dispersing clouds!!!
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16. Looking for genderfluid wwx or just wwx whose not afraid to wear a skirt/free every now and again
đ how to make your dad fall in love with your high school teacher in five steps; the complete and bulletproof guide by ravenditefairylights (T, 90k, wangxian, modern, coffee shop au, nonbinary LSZ, hurt/comfort, trauma, past abuse, past domestic violence, healing, hurt WWX, found family, hospitalization, therapy, single parent WWX, pining, teacher LWJ, unreliable narrator, chronic pain, queer platonic relationship, genderfluid WWX, autistic LWJ, fluff & angst)
emergent properties by luckymarrow (E, 8k, WangXian, Modern AU, Family Fluff, Trans Male Character, Trans LWJ, Queer Families, Queer Youth, Adoption, Baby LSZ, Teen MXY, Crossdressing, but not as a kink, gender expression, Dilf4Dilf Wangxian, Penis In Vagina Sex, Blow Jobs, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Smut, gender euphoria, Cunnilingus)
Cute Femboy Gets ~HUGE SURPRISE!!!~ by ScarlettStorm (E, 32k, WangXian, Modern, onlyfans au, Porn, like in the writing and as a plot point, sex worker WWX, Adhd WWX, autistic LWJ, Fashionista LWJ, Nonbinary NHS, genderfluid WWX, Feminization, (absolutely not forced and in fact very desired feminization), Date Night, Fluff and Smut, Established Relationship, Gender Exploration, they're just disgustingly in love, and they gotta fuck about it)
The Other Woman by baxia (G, 4k, MM & WWX, MM/WQ, WangXian, Modern, College/University, Misunderstandings, MM thinks LWJ is cheating, Not Cheating, Genderfluid WWX, MM & WWX friendship, POV MM)
Concrete Spaces by manaika (G, 34k, JC & WWX & JYL, WangXian, JYL/JZX, JC & JL, JC & LSZ, Family Dynamics, Family Bonding, JC's avuncular powers, WWX is LSZ's Parent, LWJ is LSZâs Parent, Everyone Is Gay, No Straights Within The Premises Of This Fic, Genderfluid WWX, ace/aro JC, trans JZX, self-expression, identity and presentation, LGBTQ Themes, JC Is Judging You)
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17. Hello, I'm in a mood for fics that explore the relationship between a-Yuan and the Wens ^^
keeping score by hauntedotamatone (T, 6k, LSZ & WWX, Background WangXian, the opposite of reconciliation, Protective WWX, Duelling, Grief/Mourning, not for jc fans, Swordfighting, Resentment, LSZ centric, No JC & WWX Reconciliation)
â€ïž nevermore, nevermore by agloeian (T, 120k, LSZ & everyone, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Not Everyone Dies, Hurt/Comfort, Found Family, Eventual Happy Ending, Angst, Suicide Attempt, Implied Sexual Content, Canon-Typical Violence, discussions of mental health, Spanish Translation, ĐĐ”ŃĐ”ĐČĐŸĐŽ ĐœĐ° ŃŃŃŃĐșĐžĐč | Translation in Russian)
đ The Moon Reflected Upon Two Springs by Rubberduckieassassin (M, 2k, Post-Canon, Fierce Corpse WN, WN-centric, Farmer WN, WN Needs a Hug, Gusu Lan Juniors Dynamics, Good Kid LSZ, Good Kid LJY, Wen Remnants Mentioned, Burial Mounds Settlement Days Mentioned, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Five Stages of Grief, Melancholy, Building A Home, Family Feels, WN is learning how to 'liveâ again)
body and soul by TooSel (E, 41k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Marriage Proposal, Everyone Lives AU, Cultivation Sect Politics, YĂlĂng WĂši Sect AU, Adoption, Smut, Friends to Lovers, Angst with a Happy Ending)
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If you didnât get an answer to your ask here, donât forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesnât have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - itâs all good!***
#wangxian#mdzs#wangxian fic recs#i'm in the mood for a fic#the untamed#wangxian fic search#wangxianficfinder#long post
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thinking about rex and cody and their emotional support twins that they accidentally adopted and now share custody of and would die for
#i need more fics discussing their relationship#because rex and cody were THERE#they saw echo and fives lose their batch#so give me content about them đ€đ€đ€#do not tag as clone/cest#captain rex#commander cody#arc trooper echo#arc trooper fives#star wars#the clone wars#the bad batch
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i rmr when all the initial meta around endgame was coming out people were talking about steve being depressed and whatnot and it's like well yeah but he's BEEN depressed, like he woke up alone in this century and he kept going, now i can understand it being worse this time after finding a family and getting bucky back and losing them all except of course that's not why endgame steve was on about so like......the people writing meta were trying to connect these things that of course weren't really there on screen because that simply wasn't our steve
but i think it really could've been SO interesting to see this is the thing that finally makes steve stay down like he's lost so much and he just CAN'T keep fighting like i get some people think that's what they were going for but considering the ending......it's really not. and so i'm just thinking about a version after iw, maybe he gets some of the thor treatment except not turning his depression into a dumb fatphobic joke lol and maybe nat and others are trying to get through to him and it just doesn't work and then we get some flashbacks (which you could have done for all the original avengers actually which would be particularly important for bruce and nat and clint who did not have their own trilogies) including his mom telling him "you always stand up" and THAT being the thing to finally get him moving like it would've been such a perfect way to finally show sarah rogers some respect and ACTUALLY show steve really struggling instead of whatever they tried to do with him in that movie
#steve rogers#mcu#anti endgame#why am i still rewriting this movie five years later#really though i think i rmr just trying to work through it all#and a lot of the meta i was reblogging initially still wasn't really accurate to endgame or the rest of the mcu#like they were still making steggy more important than it canonically was while trying to explain why it was a bad ending#and it's kind of like you can say steve would respect that peggy had a life and wouldn't interfere with it but that's about it like#going on about how he DID love her so much and just wouldn't be selfish enough to do those things#or that she was soooo important to his moral compass (hence why so many fic writers had her telling him to go back to bucky lol insanity)#are just not accurate lmao i do think much as she may be rightfully disliked#while canonically he did not LOVE her he did respect her even if we think that's annoying bc she's an asshole to him in catfa#but yeah no he had a moral compass before her i understand what people were going for with the compass being symbolic but like....#any time she said anything did he listen? except for maybe when she told him he was meant for more? it really doesn't seem like it#nor did he need it! jesus! the whole point of catfa is he was chosen for a REASON he was already a good man#he did not need peggy 'sure i'll let nazis into shield' carter to teach him shit#but yeah it was bc i followed one stucky blog at the time who was reblogging a lot of good shit but a lot of that nonsensical shit too#and i was just reblogging it all bc everything sounded better than endgame#and i really did start seeing more of the discussions around peggy where her culpability in catws hadn't even occurred to me#bc i was so in fic from the beginning of joining fandom that not only was their relationship made as impt as stucky#it was also made out like what happened to shield was hurting her legacy and it's like...but she had to have at least SOME responsibility#and yeah eventually it's like okay no it's not just that steve wouldn't Do That it's also that they would've been a terrible couple#and not only would he not be so selfish but he wouldn't give up everything for HER lmao but he would've for bucky as was shown over and ove
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âThere is no fanfic on Stephs treatment I have checkedâ thatâs like the whole point.
#Iâm not saying ur wrong bc itâs not canon#Iâm saying ur wrong bc ur perpetuating the misogyny that got u there in the first place#and yeah imma take it there it IS that deep to me sorry#like this isnât like a diff in opinion on an arc or smth#this is quite literally the bigotry that fandoms supposed to be an escape from manifesting itself again with a rainbow flag over it itâs so#like first of all not that serious but concerning to me is getting into smth without knowing the source material#u donât need to know the exact timeline of events and which specific Batmobile Bruce had in every era duh#thatâd be hypocritical to say I read character to character screw the timeline lmao#but itâs like. ur telling me u adore Dick Grayson and have never picked up NTT?#u wanna analyze the queer coding in Timâs character but youâve never read his og robin run?#u wanna talk about Damianâs character growth but youâve only read Batman and Robin 2020s?#u ADORRRRE steph and cass and you havenât even read batgirls#and thatâs like nonissues#my issues are u wanna discuss how Barbara is actually so cold and cruel to dick for how she handled Catalina and youâve never read birds of#prey and actually dick never cheated so (this isnât me being hypocritical if youâve seen that post I just lowk changed my mind)#or if he did it was justified or whatever#you wanna talk about how Jason and Roy are soulmates and you canât tell me a single thing besides heâs an archer a father and an addict#itâs like ur putting shit out there about these characters and their relationships and you donât know them#and more people who donât know them see ur shit and do the same thing#and thatâs mid level issue#the BIG issue is that yâall have not unpacked ur racism misogyny or classism enough to do this and then turn around and say ur fixing dc or#whatever. u have not done enough work to speak on Jason or Damian and say they deserve better whilst u water down their anger into smth#palatable and sweet on ur white faves. u donât get to complain about how thereâs not enough about steph and all u do is spread more made up#shit to infantilize tim. and Iâm not saying Iâll never read a tim centric fic thatâs ooc and stupid and have fun#I do that and I donât talk about it bc that shit should not be the main writing you find when you look for BATMAN lmao#and even then they HIGHEST problem is that even when people make more content centering the woc poc and yes even WW it still doesnât get any#traction bc yâall havenât unpacked as much of ur racism and misogyny as u think u have#making hcs about tim being a Barbie and Jason being a feminist and dick painting his nails is not progressive when Steph and cass are#cardboard cutouts or the vehicles through which the white men discover feminity is ok actually and nothing else#and then Duke and Damian are the token straights or allies. like yâall are so sick lmao
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actually ascension needs its own post since that's the one with the most details to speculate over and im starved for soho talk so i will talk to myself if need be
First the cover again, because I kinda can't get over it:
my only thing is that I had been hoping we might get Lizbeth on a cover again since she's never been on one of the boxsets before, despite being the 2nd person credited on all 4 of them (even if that's just alphabetical, still, she's the only one of the four main characters who never makes the cover)
But letting that go...
I know we already kinda knew the brief for this one but damn I didn't expect it to go quite this hard. Maybe that's just because the Parasite & Ashenden covers were (comparatively) similarish to each other and I was so pleased with Unbegotten's, and then got so used to it as the placeholder for Ascension while they kept postponing it, I wasn't expecting anything this colorful or detailed or with what I can't help but register as Fun New Outfits even though these are still like, pretty damn basic as far as costumes go. Still, it's a different vibe from everyone in suits and trenchcoats on every cover, technically. (Oh the woes of being an audio fan such that two characters owning sweaters actually does qualify as new information)
On top of just being visually delightful though, I know we knew religion was gonna be a fairly big part of this one, but I didn't actually expect to get quite this much of it - though I'm glad of it for a number of reasons. The BF twitter already made the ineffable joke so I don't have to, but also yeah I did very much spend all of season 2 episode 4 of good omens half convinced Samuel Barnett & Dervla Kirwan were about to pop up around any given corner (if you will go around being gay supernatural and horrible at your messy bureaucratic jobs in midcentury soho then I'm sorry, this is where my brain's gonna go) - so, fuel to that fire. But in terms of actual important things, at least one of my Soho wishes looks to be being granted because we have a Rev Edward Folgate on the cast list, which must mean we're finally meeting Norton's father, even if his mother & brother don't appear (which they could, technically, I've definitely seen BF not list all the doublings on their cast tabs before). Religion, domesticity, and the nuclear family are all things that absolutely fascinate me when it comes to Norton's character, so getting any amount of story involving his father & his church is something I've been actively hoping for for a long time now.
(I will say I'm a tiny bit bummed Saffron Coomber isn't on the cast list to play Mia again, but I kinda figured she wasn't going to be since Greg Austin's Armitage, who's making his first recurring appearance after originating in Unbegotten, was listed ever since the boxset was announced - presumably if she was also returning, that would've been handled in the same way. But since Unbegotten ended with Lizbeth and Mia going on a date, I still held out hope. Who knows though, maybe things did go well for them and Lizbeth just has a better work/life balance than Norton so she can date someone without them getting dragged into every scifi plot. I know that's not a very common accomplishment for any Torchwood agent, but a gal can hope)
At this point I know I'm completely in the realm of speculation & even wishful thinking, but I'm really really hoping we get some more clues as to Norton's overall timeline in this one, and I have a feeling that even if there's nothing as direct as dates given, the events of a plot like this one are going to heavily influence my personal interpretation of it.
To say that life & death are major themes for the soho crew feels wildly reductive, but even by Torchwood's standards and taking into account its origins as a piece of media with Jack Harkness & his newfound immortality at the heart of it, the living/dead status of this bunch has always been fantastically up in the air to me. Obviously Ghost Mission introduced Norton as kind of a ghost before revealing more obvious ghostly characters later on to which the title might have been referring, but his being from the past did beg the question of his survival into Torchwood's present era all the same, which Outbreak later alludes to much more directly, and his habit of showing up via hologram in multiple stories only further obfuscates any certainty we might have about where & when he definitely can be said to be alive and well. Then you've got Lizbeth and Gideon both being effectively 'brought back to life' via paradoxes that prevented them ever having died in the first place. Again, they are very very far from being the only Torcwhood characters this happens to (for a sprawling EU, it's really rather impressive how often & in how many different ways Torchwood as a whole manages to circle back to being about like. chaotic undead queers at the end of every day. though I suppose that consistency is part of why I keep falling in love with its different iterations again and again). That's without even getting into the question of Norton's dubious fate in God Among Us - and I say dubious because I know some people take that to be his ultimate death, but I personally think that reading something as vague as that as having any kind of finality rather goes against the spirit of this whole world/series, not just because I want him to live. (There are obviously other ways to make him survive/reappear, but I don't see this as a River Song scenario where we can safely assume one of his earlier-released adventures had to happen at the end of his personal timeline). But wherever God Among Us falls for him, he does very much meet God in it - or at least, a god, since the sentinel in Unbegotten is also described as a god of sorts, and even if he doesn't ultimately have the status of the god Jacqueline King is playing there, Unbegotten is still full to bursting with ghosts/undead/came back wrong/echo characters to continue underscoring that life/afterlife theme.
So all things considered, even allowing for the fact that we know Norton's twin hobbies are lying about himself and abusing time travel to suit his own ends/ever-shifting alliances, I find it difficult to believe we could get through a whole 6-part boxset about religion & death without something providing some kind of compelling evidence about where this adventure fits in among his other run-ins with apocalypses and gods and ghosts and dead-but-still-here characters/creatures, so I'm very much looking forward to any further exploration on that front.
And lastly, and least intellectually, I really want to know what the hell 20th-century Torchwood's obsession with Reginalds is. Reading through the cast list, I had to do two separate doubletakes over the character 'Sir Reginald Peebles' - firstly, because I had Reginald Rigsby on the brain, this being Soho (and the other Troughton brother being so active on BF's releases for this same month) - and secondly, because reading this in conjunction with the announcement for the July monthly adventure in which the new main Torchwood guy of the 20s is apparently called Sir Reginald Dellafield, there was a brief moment where I took that monthly release to be a tie-in with Ascension. I don't expect it to be, but damn. was it really so popular a name?
anyways, catch me thinking about those stained glass windows for the next couple months I guess (and knowing Torchwood Soho, for a long long time after it comes out as well lol)
#torchwood soho: ascension#let's start with the most obvious shall we? behind norton - hellfire or divine radiance? whadda we think?#i know one's much more likely for him but also consider: he's been a fairly good boy by norton standards anyway lately#well i say 'lately' like i know when this takes place#idk why but i kinda feel like this starts very soon after unbegotten#comedy is probably why honestly. since that ends with them being like hey! something went right!#i think ever since i first heard that i was like ok cool so the next installment's gonna be something earth shatteringly bad#& it's gonna kick off dramatically literally one second after this scene ends right?#not that it wouldnt be nice to have some (clearly-defined) timeskip there#tbh i feel like that's the one thing that's missing with soho sometimes - those little medium-sized gaps in continuity#where either speculation or even a missing scenes style fic would go#between parasite & ashenden lizbeth was dead and andy wasnt in the right era for soho shenanigans#and norton and gideon went through SO much offscreen (offmic?)#rebuilding torchwood and starting a relationship and breaking up and getting possessed by space eels and destroying torchwood again#that's like... Too Much to analyze/meaningfully discuss without a few more details from canon#and between Ashenden & Unbegotten it's very unclear how much time has passed#norton certainly seems affected when he sees gideon again for the first time but we also know he went there for him so how long was it?#that and we have literally zero explanation for what andy's doing in the 50s in that one to begin with. has he been there continuously?#or did he leave and come back? if so did norton even have to try justifying it to him?#or does andy just accept at this point that he'll be summoned for anything norton feels is noteworthy? honestly either's plausible w him#but also we have so little confirmed about what torchwood looks like at this point in time!#maybe andy gets summoned for all missions bc he norton and lizbeth are virtually the only agents left after gideon quits#there's just a few too many things unexplained/alluded to for me to go total total fandom mode on this#speculating & theorizing about everything that happens off-audio#doubtless this is mainly bc of norton's general untrustworthiness#like im sure a different main character would've left the audience with fewer uncertainties after this many hours of storytelling#but with soho im still left needing just a tiiiiiny bit more before i feel im knowledgeable enough about the situation to expand upon it#in the traditional fandomy 'transformative' way#right now most of my fanning over it is just speculation about what precisely we can be confident in from the dialogue we do have#but i'd like to go further than that truly. these characters captivate me. obviously.
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...am I thinking about a story divergence bonus chapter for the sexting fic? Maybe so.
#maybe even two of them.#but definitely one where they agree to meet before they figure out it's each other#and then have a small crisis and then very good sex#and afterwards a little discussion about relationships xD#anyway#i hate my brain#would like the ability to finish things instead of starting a new wip every other day#kaj rambles#that sexting fic#i need to write more cotta/goodween smut anyway
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cross that line ê€ (l.h)
part two
pairing: Logan Howlett x fem!reader
summary: For a long time, you were content hiding your feelings, but lately, the longing for someone you canât have has become unbearable. Despite knowing he could never be yours, you still cherished the sweet ache in your heart whenever he smiled or gave you a warm, platonic hug. Then, one day, everything changed.
genre: fluff + angst + smut (18+ mdni)
word count: 14k (14k on the dot to be precise but yeah uhm. sorry. I swear I'm normal)
warnings/tags: friends to lovers, roommates to lovers, thunderstorms, idiots in love, mutual pining, assumed unrequited love, jealous!reader, reader is described as shorter than logan, emotional!reader, miscommunication kinda, inexperienced/virgin!reader, loss of virginity, unprotected sex, piv sex, soft!dom logan, ok⊠just in overall bye, logan is soft for reader, sub!reader, vaginal fingering, oral (f!receiving), multiple orgasms, creampie, overstimulation, major size kink, praise kink, dirty talk, oral fixation. some daddy kink? breeding kink aaaaa sorry. I wrote this while ovulating. theyâre both FREAKS. scent kink? lots of pet names. this is high key sweet and turns filthy. logan is worshipping his sweet girl ok! reader is a mutant. reader has hair, no further description though. this is not beta read sorry!
a/n: GUESS WHAT!!! user healmydesires is back with another self indulgent fic about a new blorbo! Iâve been having all random kinds of scenarios about logan in my head and I just didnât know which type of story to go with. until I felt like there werenât much of inexperienced/virgin reader fics for logan and tbhïżœïżœ thatâs kinda my brand (Iâm high key kidding but lowkey thatâs what I love to write the most) if youâve read my works so. I thought Iâll write what I WANT to read. so this is high key self indulgent. english isnât my first language so pls bear with me <3 also ngl.. a lot of it is just smut đ I literally wrote this while ovulating⊠EDIT (19/09): I kinda edited it a bit because it had a lot of grammar mistakes and I'd often jump from present tense to past tense so ye
this goes without saying, but if you don't like it don't read it <3
AO3 âą masterlist
Being roommates with your best friend had its perks. You were together almost all the time, sharing both the big and small moments. As fellow teachers, you could easily swap teaching tips, lend each other a hand with tasks, or offer guidance when you were feeling stuck. Your tall best friend effortlessly reached the top shelves, and you both enjoyed laughter-filled moments during movie marathons. Sharing responsibilities became more fun tooâsplitting chores like cooking and laundry felt easy and natural. Plus, there was comfort in knowing your best friend was always dependable, ready to support you whenever you needed it. And whenever you were in need of a hug, your best friend was probably already ready to envelop you in his warm embrace.
But it also had its disadvantages.
Especially considering that Logan Howlett, your best friend, was quite the menace.
Logan had always had a rugged handsomeness that effortlessly made people swoon all around him. It wasn't fair how pretty he was. He had always been lucky with finding partnersâor rather, when it came to finding bed or sexual partners. He'd often bring those one-night stands or partners to your shared apartment only to have sex with them. Logan had never been the type to stick with one person, always preferring flings over long-term relationships. Or so you thought.
You, on the other hand, had always craved a long-term relationship. You dreamed of finding your true loveâsomeone to share adventures with, to have fun with, and to dive into deep, meaningful and random conversations. You loved the idea of being with someone who let you be your true self, where you could spend hours talking about the most random thingsâdiscussing your favourite TV shows one minute, and passionately criticising capitalism and the world the next. You were all about affection, from kissing to being held, but you also longed to hold your partner close and make them feel cherished, just as much as you wanted to feel loved in return.
Unfortunately, you had never had the chance to experience anything like that.
It wasn't like you had never had the chance or had the opportunity to explore and possibly experience a potential relationship. You had just never been really interested in creating a relationship with a stranger.
Plus the thing was, your best friend wasn't just your best friend. You had been in love with Logan for god knows how long.
Charles Xavier was the one who had introduced you both, years ago. You remembered that day very vividly.
You had just arrived at the Xavier Institute, and the professor had offered you a two-sided job, to be a teacher at the school and be part of the X-Men.
You'd always done your best to keep your powers hidden, but being welcomed into a school designed for people like youâa mutantâfelt incredibly liberating. That's why you hadn't hesitated when Charles Xavier invited you to his school. You'd always known you were powerful, with the ability to control and manipulate water, but you had kept your abilities a secret, not wanting to be treated any differently in a world that didn't really like or understand people like you.
As the professor took you around the grounds, you couldn't help but be impressed by how big and beautiful it all was.
You were so captivated by the mansion's grandeur and stunning architecture that you didn't even notice a guy casually leaning against the nearest wall outside of Charles's office. But the moment your eyes met his, it felt as if time itself stood still. Looking into Logan's eyes, you felt like you could drown in them. You had never seen anyone so effortlessly handsome.
Completely entranced by him, you almost forgot to introduce yourself. Your body heated up in the moment, and the professor definitely noticed. Logan Howlett gave you a knowing smirk, making the warmth inside you intensify even more.
That day you both became friends, though you still didn't quite understand why, given how different you both were. Logan was gruff and blunt, while you, though capable of being direct, tended to choose your words more carefully. He was passionate and strong-willed and opinionated, and sometimes he let that get the best of him. You were deeply in tune with your emotions, while he always seemed to hold back, keeping certain feelings tightly guarded. Logan was never one to be very straightforward with his emotions. He would rather keep most of them to himself, and didn't want to seem too vulnerable. Communication was something you valued and needed a lot, but Logan, by contrast, didn't seem to rely on it as much. You were an overthinker, always caught up in your thoughts, and he would often step in to ease those worries of yours.
You could say that opposites attract.
Over time, your friendship grew, and one day he asked if you'd like to move in with him into a new apartment near the institute. He craved a bit more peace and genuinely enjoyed your company. It seemed like a good idea, so you thought, why not?
You couldn't pinpoint the exact moment you fell in love with your roommate. All you knew was that one day, you were suddenly overcome by an emotion so intense, it was unlike anything you'd ever felt before. It hit you all at once. Before Logan, you'd never really had a serious crush, never experienced feelings this powerful for anyone. You often told yourself it must have started shortly after you moved in with him, but deep down, you knew that wasn't the truth. This feeling had been quietly growing from the very first moment you met him, slowly building until it became impossible to ignore.
It was funny, you thought, how life had a way of bringing you thingsâand peopleâyou never realised you needed. People like Logan, who became so essential that you couldn't help but wonder how you had ever lived without them. People like Logan Howlett, who somehow managed to be both your saving grace and your greatest temptation.
â©âË.ââŸââșââ§
A few months into your roommate arrangement, you still couldn't get used to Logan constantly bringing one-night stands to your shared apartment. It was pure torment.
As you ate cereal at the kitchen island, one of Logan's many one-night stands quietly slipped out of the apartment. You rolled your eyes, as Logan routinely walked them through the apartment to the door, their faces often adorned with sly smiles as they fluttered their eyelashes at him. A knot of anger twisted in your belly as you watched them play with the collar of his shirt, their fingers lingering while he made no move to pull away. You'd never felt such intense rage before. He responded with a grunt as they would casually give him a goodbye kiss.
You hated experiencing feelings like these. It was a gross emotion, a heavy sensation that felt thick and tar-like, clinging to your chest and making you ache with its heavy weight.
Anxiety? Sure, you were often more anxious than most mutants, but that wasn't the feeling you had at this moment. Maybe it was jealousy? You disliked how that emotion fit so easily on your tongue, leaving a bitter taste.
Each time you witnessed these scenes unfold, jealousy and frustration would wash over you. Or how you'd feel utterly awful whenever you accidentally overheard them having sex.
As Logan reentered the apartment and closed the door behind him, you couldn't help but snort. âSo, what number are we up to now?â
He stared at you for a moment, before chuckling and shaking his head with a smirk. âNot sure, lost count.â He shrugged, grabbed an apple from the fruit basket on the kitchen island, and took a bite.
âWhat was their name?â you asked, staring daggers at your bowl of cereal.
Logan shrugged again. âI don't know, and honestly, I don't care,â he replied curtly before walking away.
You couldn't understand how he could be so nonchalant about this situation.
It wasn't just jealousy; you longed for any kind of affection or love from Logan, more than you ever thought possible. You were grateful to be his best friend and you knew it might seem foolish to hope for a chance with him, but you couldn't help yourself. Deep down, you feared you'd always feel this lonely, believing you could never fall for anyone but him. He was everything you craved and needed in life.
You felt foolish, constantly embarrassed and rejected. More than anything, you felt hurt, knowing that you were the only one to blame. It was your own feelings that had caused all this pain.
The thought of him one day falling in love with someone else made your stomach sink, but you pushed and suppressed your sadness aside daily. It didn't really matterâLogan was free to date whoever he wanted. He was your best friend, only his best friend.
One day, you'd have to come to terms with the fact that he would always be just your best friend.
You just hoped that one day it would become easier to deal with these feelings.
â©âË.ââŸââșââ§
It was the middle of a cold winter night â the air cool against your skin, even with your large pink puffer jacket to keep you warm. The thick curtain of night enveloped the sky, painting it a deep midnight blue, with stars twinkling like the clearest diamonds. Despite the cool ambient air, you found yourself relaxing, your shoulders gradually easing.
âYou see that there?â you pointed up at the starlit sky, leaning unconsciously into Logan's warmth as you both lay on the grass of the X-mansion grounds. âThat's the Pleiades. People often mistake it for the Little Dipper, but it's just a star cluster.â
Logan hummed, but his eyes were focused on you, how you gazed up at the stars with an awestruck expression. A gentle smile tugged at his lips, as he enjoyed how you looked so endearing as you were so engrossed in the stars that you loved so dearly.
He glanced up at the part of the sky you were pointing to, located the cluster of stars you had mentioned. He studied it for a moment and thought he had seen something similar to the Pleiades before, but never illuminated in the night sky like this. Logan's gaze then returned to the earth, settling back on the grass where he lay beside you.
âBeautiful,â Logan whispered as he stared at you. âTruly beautiful.â
You were too busy gazing up at the sky to realise that he wasn't talking about the sky.
For as long as you could remember, you had loved the night sky, finding its dark embrace profoundly comforting. More than that, you adored the starsâcoming out at night to bask in their radiance, with their distant coldness soothing your soul.
You had always felt so mesmerised about the universe, especially the stars and the moon. They appeared beautiful, glittering magnificently beside one another as they hovered in the upper stratosphere.
âWhy did you bring me out here, Lo?â you finally asked, looking up at your best friend. You noticed him smirk down at you and saw a fleeting hint of hesitant insecurity in his green eyes, but it disappeared as quickly as it had appeared.
He shrugged against you, still grinning. âI know how much you enjoy stargazing, and I'm aware you've had a rough week, so I wanted to give you a chance to relax for a bit.â
You softened as you gazed up at him. Logan was rightâyou had been having a rough week. The children had been sweet, but the workload had been overwhelming. You couldn't help but appreciate how Logan was always looking out for you.
âThank youâŠâ you whispered.
âAnything for you, sweetheart.â He winked before he looked back up at the sky. âWhy don't you show me another constellation?â
You giggled as you pointed out another cluster of stars, but more often than not, Logan found it hard to focus on the stars. After all, he had a bright light of his own by his side daily that captured all of his attention.
â©âË.ââŸââșââ§
A year had passed since you moved in with Logan, and autumn was already around the corner. The temperature was gradually dropping, and the air became crisper. The trees' leaves were starting to fade from vibrant greens to tamer shades of bronze and gold. You had always loved this time of yearâit was that perfect season where you could bundle up in layers when you were outside, then retreat indoors in the evenings, getting cosy with a hot chocolate and a good book.
It was during seasons like this that you found yourself wishing you could cuddle up with someone, enjoying a movie or simply each other's company. But it wasn't just anyone you wanted by your sideâit had always been Logan for you.
For the longest time, you were content in just keeping all your feelings hidden. Lately, though, the longing had been getting harder to bear. Wanting someone you knew you couldn't have was starting to feel unbearable, slowly eating away at you. And even though you knew he could never be yours, it didn't stop you from savouring the sweet ache in your heart every time he smiled or when he pulled you into a warm, platonic hug.
All the stupid fluttery feelings in your stomach every time his eyes would catch yours, or the way your heart beat fast whenever you were in close proximity to him. You knew it had been years since you'd known Logan, but you couldn't help the effect he always had on you. The way he left you yearning for more. But, of course, you tried to bury those feelings down deep, reminding yourself that Logan could never feel the same way about you as you felt about him.
â©âË.ââŸââșââ§
One lazy afternoon, with no classes scheduled for you to teach, you found yourself by the lake on the X-Mansion grounds, practising your water bending. The water flowed seamlessly around you as you moved your arms, bending it effortlessly to your will. As you went through each movement, you could feel a pair of eyes on you, observing every precise motion, your muscles tensing with each fluid shift. A light sheen of sweat formed on your brow, and your face held a fierce look of concentration as you focused on perfecting your stance and movements.
Several moments had passed, and the person watching you still hadn't spoken a word. By now, you were almost certain it wasn't just anyoneâit had to be Logan. Anyone else would have said something by now, maybe greeted you or asked about your training. But not Logan. He had a way of lingering in silence, watching you in that quietly intense way of his, never feeling the need to fill the space with unnecessary words.
âWell, are you just going to stand there and stare, or do you plan on saying something?â you asked, a playful smile tugging at your lips.
Logan grunted, âI think I'll just keep watching. I quite like the view from here.â
A flush of warmth spread across your face, butterflies fluttering wildly in your stomach at his words. You hesitated for a moment, pausing your movements before he spoke again.
âDon't stop on my account, sweetheart.â
You knew he was wearing one of his signature grins, and you so desperately wanted to wipe it off his face. As you grew more flustered, a wave of frustration built up inside youâhow could this man always have such an effect on you? An idea sparked in your mind, a mischievous smirk tugging at your lips. Deciding to continue your water bending practice while he watched, you let the water flow effortlessly around you, fully aware of his eyes tracking your every move.
Once a peaceful stillness settled in the air, you saw your opening. Without warning, you spun around with swift precision, bending the water toward him and drenching him in seconds.
Logan stood there, completely perplexed as you broke into a fit of giggles. He was drenched from head to toe, and you knew it wouldn't be long before he sprang into action. Sure enough, just seconds later, he smirked again, though this time it carried a sharper edge. âYou think this is funny, bub?â
âYeah, I kinda do,â you replied between laughs, unable to contain yourself.
But then, Logan's grin turned devious, and with a determined march, he began closing the distance between you. Your eyes widened in realisation, and without thinking, you bolted away.
âYou're not getting away with this, princess,â he called out, his voice low as he gave chase.
He moved swiftly through the gardens, but you were quicker, slipping just out of sight every time he got close. His eyes darted around, scanning the area, frustration slowly turning into determination. You could hear him muttering under his breath, his footsteps getting louder as he searched for you. Your heart raced as you ducked behind a tree, trying to stifle your laughter. The thrill of the chase had adrenaline coursing through your veins.
For a moment, you thought you had lost him, but then he sniffed and just as you peeked around the tree, you saw him spot you from across the grove. His eyes gleamed with mischief as a smirk curled at the corner of his lips. âI got you,â he muttered before he moved towards you with renewed speed. You tried to slip away again, but it was too lateâhe had you cornered.
Soon enough, two strong arms caged you in, trapping you between the tree and his chest. A startled yelp escaped your lips as you tried to back away, only to realise there was nowhere to go. âGotcha,â he murmured, his voice low and teasing, the familiar playful glint in his eyes making your heart race even faster.
You squirmed, trying to find a way out, but his grip tightened just enough to keep you in place without being overbearing. âLogan! Let me go,â you protested, laughter bubbling up in your throat despite your attempt to sound serious.
âThought you could get away that easily, huh?â he teased, leaning in so close that you could feel his wet clothes and the warmth of his body. The heat from his proximity spread across your own, making you acutely aware of how close you were. You bit your lip, your cheeks becoming hotter as his smirk widened. The sight of your flustered expression seemed to delight him, his satisfaction evident in his playful gaze.
âWell, this is cosy,â you remarked, but your voice barely rose above a whisper. There was a tremor in your tone, one that matched the rapid beat of your heart.
âHm, I think so too,â he responded with the same teasing tone. You gazed up at him with bright eyes as the golden hour of evening cast a warm glow around you both. It took all his willpower not to look away, not to acknowledge the tension that hung thick in the air.
You shifted against the tree, searching for a different way to elicit a reaction from him. Your touch light, almost accidental, but it sent a shockwave through him, his breath hitching in his throat. You could feel him stiffen, sensing the tension as he reacted to your contact.
He leaned in, just enough that he could feel your breath against his skin, just enough that the space between you became almost non-existent, and just enough to hear your breath hitch.
Logan closed his eyes, as he pressed his forehead against your own. Every time he tried to speak, the words got tangled up in the mess of emotions swirling inside him. All he could think about was how close you were, how your touch burned through him, how the smell of you, that unique soft scent of yours, filled his senses and made him want to lose himself in you.
âLoââ
Before you could finish, Ororo's voice rang out, calling your name. You felt a wave of disappointment wash over you as you realised your moment with Logan was interrupted. You had forgotten about the promise to cook together with her and Jean, and your friend's timing burst the bubble of what you thought might finally be a shared moment with him.
He grunted in frustration, pulling away from you and looking off to the side. Ororo, Jean, and even Scott soon found their way to you, their presence drawing closer. As they approached, each of them wore a grin that suggested they had noticed the tension between you and Logan. The air was thick with unspoken understanding, and it was clear that your friends had picked up on the charged moment that had just been interrupted.
You cleared your throat and stepped reluctantly away from Logan, trying to regain your composure. You forced a smile as you addressed your friends, saying, âSorry to keep you guys waiting.â You then walked away with Jean and Ororo towards the mansion, though you couldn't help glancing back over your shoulder. Each time you looked, a hint of longing appeared on your face as you cast a final, wistful glance at Logan.
As you walked away, you heard Scott remark, âYou look wet.â
Logan responded with a huff, âFuck off, Summers.â
You couldn't help but wonder what would've happened if your friends wouldn't have interrupted you.
â©âË.ââŸââșââ§
It had been Friday evening, and you were in your office at the institute, finishing up grading the last of the papers while waiting for Logan. The two of you had plans to head home together, but he had yet to come and find you. Growing impatient, you decided to look for him yourself. You grabbed your bag and jacket before going out of your office, closing the door silently behind you. The smell of stew wafted through the mansion as you jogged down the stairs from your office to the kitchen. You quietly approached and paused when you saw him with Jean. She was chopping vegetables, while Logan leaned against the island, holding a cup of coffee.
âI don't see why you don't just do it. Everyone can see how perfect you two are for each other,â Jean had sighed.
Your eyes widened and you bit your lip nervously as you instinctively hid behind the wall. You truly hoped Logan wouldn't smell your scent while hiding, considering his heightened sense of smell. You knew you shouldn't be eavesdropping, but your curiosity had gotten the better of you. Jean's words had left you intrigued about what they were discussing.
Logan huffed, âI've already told youââ he tried arguing, but Jean cut him off mid-sentence.
âLogan, come on,â Jean said pointedly. âYou keep denying it, but everyone here has seen the two of you dance around each other for years. You can't honestly tell me that you're just friends. Friends don't act the way you two do with each other.â
âWhat's that supposed to mean?â Logan asked, tilting his head to the side. Your stomach churned as you realised they were talking about the two of you. Silently, you pressed your back against the wall and shuffled further behind it, continuing to listen.
âIt means that friends don't stare at each other longingly, or they don't flirt with each other, and they certainly don't cuddle together while sharing the same bed,â Jean said, emphasising her point as Logan began to argue. âBesides,â she continued, âyou've known her for a while now. There's no one you've been more comfortable with than her. We all know you'll look after each other and be happy together. So why haven't you done anything about it? All we want is for you both to be happy,â Jean concluded.
You bit your lip at her words, feeling a mix of hope and nervousness churn in your stomach. With trembling fingers, you held your breath, waiting for Logan's response. When you heard him sigh, you felt your world begin to crumble around you.
âYeah, but Jean, it's not like that. We are not like that. We're just friends,â Logan had replied. You had pressed your teeth harshly into your lip, biting down so hard you feared you might draw blood. It was the only thing keeping you from sobbing out loud. Logan's words replayed over and over in your mind. While you had always known he felt that way, hearing it confirmed so casually had left your heart breaking.
Not wanting to listen any longer, you silently turned and hurried toward the main entrance, trying to be as quiet as possible. Once outside, tears flooded your vision as you ran to the mansion gates, searching through your bag for your phone to call a cab. Since you hadn't brought your car and had driven in with Logan that morning, calling a cab was your only option.
When the cab finally arrived, you slid into the backseat and gave the driver your instructions. As he drove you home, you took a deep breath, struggling to swallow the lump in your throat. Your breath came in labored gasps as you fought to keep from breaking down in tears. Your mind was running a mile a minute as you tried to process his words. Silently you let the tears flow down your cheeks.
When you arrived at your building, you paid the cab and noticed your phone buzzing incessantly. You quickly silenced it as you entered your apartment, not bothering to look at who was trying to contact you.
Once you entered your bedroom, you broke down just then as you let out a choked sob while stripping off your clothes. With great effort, you managed to put on your pyjamas before climbing into bed. Soon, you would let your destructive thoughts take over. Deep down, you knew you shouldn't have eavesdropped on their conversation and jumped to conclusions, especially since Logan wasn't done speaking with Jean. But you couldn't bear to stay and listen any longer. You felt too vulnerable as you let his words echo inside your head.
You had been ignoring all the texts from your friends and the calls from Logan specifically, too drained to even hold a conversation.
Eventually, you felt sleep overtaking you, utterly exhausted from a long workweek and an emotionally draining evening.ââââââââââââââââ
â©âË.ââŸââșââ§
That same night, you had jolted awake to the sound of a loud rumble. Outside, storm clouds loomed ominously over the city, with thunder crackling through them every few minutes. The storm had been raging outside your apartment, with thunder booming so fiercely it shook the windows. Curled up in your bed, you had whimpered softly, clutching a thick blanket tightly around youânot just for warmth, but for comfort and a sense of protection.
You had never liked thunderstorms, and by now, you must have tried a thousand different ways to distract yourself from them. You'd put on headphones to drown out the noise, but the knowledge of the storm outside still fed your anxiety. Thunderstorms always had a way of making you feel small and utterly helpless.
You felt a tightness building in your chest as you trembled beneath the sheets. Tears welled up in your eyes as you tried to steady your breathing and calm yourself down. In moments like these, you felt truly helpless. You knew you shouldn't feel ashamed for being this terrified, but you couldn't help it.
You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to focus on the song playing through your headphones, desperate to drown out the storm. Moments later, you felt the bed dip. Slowly, you opened your eyes and found Logan sitting at the end of your bed, his soft gaze fixed on you with a look of quiet concern. A wave of relief washed over you just at the sight of him. Part of you wanted to ignore him and continue being upset with everything that had happened earlier that evening, but you couldn't find the power to do so. After all, he probably didn't even know why you were upset and who were you even kidding, he was everything you needed.
He was sitting there shirtless, dressed only in a pair of grey sweatpants. His hair was tousled from sleep. If it weren't for the sheer terror you felt because of the storm outside, you knew your cheeks would be burning at the sight of him like this. You noticed his mouth moving and, reluctantly, you slid one headphone off your ear to hear him.
âW-what?â you squeaked, your voice barely above a whisper.
âSweetheart,â Logan whispered cautiously into the darkness.
At the sound of his voice, the tears that had been brimming in your eyes finally spilled down your cheeks. âI'm so sorry, I feel so stupid,â you whispered, taking off your headphones and quickly trying to wipe your tears away, embarrassed by your emotions and the fact that you were terrified by the storm.
Seconds later Logan was climbing up the bed and he was lying right next to you. His strong arms wrapped around your shaking form almost immediately, holding you tightly.
âShhh it's okay sweet girl, I've got you,â he whispered softly as he kissed your temple. Warmth spread through you at the action and you melted into his embrace.
âI hate being scared of them, Lo,â you mumbled into his chest as he squeezed you tightly.
âIt's okay princess, I got you. I won't let anything happen to you.â His hands, surprisingly soft, were stroking your skin in a soothing manner as he continued to press soft kisses around the top of your head.
As Logan held you, you felt yourself slowly begin to calm down. Even though the storm showed no signs of letting up, his presence made you feel much more at ease and secure. Logan meant everything to youâhe was your anchor.
âPlease, stay,â you whispered as the last few tears slipped down your cheeks.
In the dark, Logan whispered your name and tightened his embrace. âI'm not going anywhere, baby girl.â
As Logan held you close, you felt your body relax gradually. He gently ran his hand through your hair, pulling the covers over both of you and adding an extra layer of warmth.
You reflected on how he often spoke to you and the way he treated you with such care. You couldn't help but overthink his sweet and gentle treatment. You knew you were more emotional and needed extra reassurance and patience, but you had never considered that he might actually have feelings for you beyond friendship. You often felt like a burden to your friends and especially to Logan. You were fairly certain you were the only one he treated this way. His teasing sometimes seemed like it could be flirting, and despite your attempts to deny it, deep down you sensed that you were somehow special to him.Â
But another part of you couldn't shake what he had said earlier that night to Jean. You felt deeply conflicted and confused about everything happening between the two of you. The uncertainty and mixed emotions left you struggling to understand his true feelings, unsure of how to navigate the situation.
So you did what felt best to you, which was communicating. Even if you hated confrontation so much, you hated being unsure even more.
âLo?â your voice trembled as you whispered against him.
âYeah, sweet girl?â He said gently.
You took a little longer to respond, lost in your own thoughts, overthinking everything. Your heart was practically beating out of your chest. Sensing your hesitation, Logan spoke up again, breaking through your spiralling mind.
âAre you okay?â he asked, his voice lingering in the air as your eyes fluttered open. His head was tilted slightly, worry etched across his face.
â'M-am fine⊠I justââ you stuttered, your voice cracking. Logan stared at you, waiting patiently for you to finish. âI need to talk about something, or-or it will probably eat me alive if I don't.â
Logan's brow furrowed as his concern deepened, but he remained patient, waiting for you to continue.
âI- I overheard you and Jean earlier tonightâŠâ your voice barely above a whisper.
Recognition settled over him at your words. He sighed shortly after. âWhat exactly did you hear?â
âYou saidâŠâ your voice faltered, cracking slightly before you took a deep breath, closing your eyes. âYou said we weren't like 'that,' and that we were just friends. After hearing that, I couldn't stay. It hurt too much.â You paused, your words tumbling out in a rush. âI know I shouldn't have eavesdropped, and I'm sorry... I justââ Your voice trailed off as you buried your face in his chest, your rambling finally coming to an end.
He let out a deep sigh, pulling you closer into his embrace. One of his hands gently cupped your cheek, causing your breath to hitch at the contact. âSweetheart,â he said, his voice steady but filled with warmth. Slowly, you opened your eyes, tears welling up as you met his gaze. Logan's expression softened, and he let out a soothing sound. âAngel, if you'd stayed a little longer, you would've heard the rest of the conversation.â
âW-what?â You squeaked, your heart pounding against your chest as you anxiously waited for him to continue.
âFirst of all,â he began, locking eyes with you as he spoke, âI told Jean that I couldn't tell you how I felt because I never thought you'd feel the same way. I figured you were better off not knowing how I feel about you becauseâŠâ His voice faltered for a moment, a heavy sigh escaping him before he continued, âI've always believed I didn't deserve someone like you. Someone so beautiful, so patient, intelligent, caring and so sweet.â
âLoââ It was difficult to process everything he had said. You had been so sure that he didn't feel anything more than platonic for you, so hearing that he did was overwhelming and you needed to let it sink in. âI just thought... you know, with all the people you've had over in the past, you wouldn't feel anything for me,â you said, your sadness making it hard to finish the sentence and your nerves bracing for the words you had been dreading to hear.ââââââââââââââââ
âI know it sounds stupid, but I kept convincing myself that if I would have meaningless sex with random people that I would get over you. That if I told you how I felt, Iâd lose you,â he went on, his vulnerability tugging at your heart. âThatâs the last thing I want. You mean too much to me to risk that. I love you, and the thought of losing youâeven if it meant not having you the way I wantedâwas unbearable.â
Tears welled in your eyes, slowly slipping down your cheeks as he poured out his heart, leaving you in disbelief. You hiccuped through your tears, âYou... y-you love me?â
His expression softened further as he took in your puffy eyes and tear-streaked cheeks. Gently, he used his hands to wipe away the tears that were slipping down your cheeks, handling you with far more tenderness and care than you had shown yourself earlier.
âOf course I do,â he replied softly. âIn every universe, there's no one I love more than you.â
âLogan, you deserve me. Just as much as I deserve you,â you said, cupping his cheeks as tears continued to stream down your own. âYou don't have an idea how much I love you.â
Logan smiled softly before placing a gentle kiss on your forehead. His arms tightened around you as he began to pepper your face with tender kisses. You couldn't help but giggle against him, feeling the tension between you both melt away bit by bit. The tears slowly came to a stop.
As the emotional intensity of the moment subsided, you felt a sense of relief and contentment. The storm outside seemed to fade into the background as you basked in the warmth of your newfound understanding. You knew that challenges would still come, but facing them together felt infinitely more manageable now that you had acknowledged your feelings for each other.ââââââââââââââââ
After placing a final kiss on the tip of your nose, he pulled back, his gaze filled with such deep affection that it left you feeling overwhelmedâbut in the best possible way.
Logan caressed your face with fondness as he admired you. âYouâre beautiful.â
Youâd feel flustered instantly. âYouâre so handsome Logan.â You whispered timidly.Â
âReally?â Heâd smile down at you.Â
âYes,â you whispered, continuing to meet his gaze shyly, your heart racing as his touch lingered on your skin.
You felt his hand slip beneath the hem of your nightshirt, his fingers tracing the soft skin of your back. A shiver ran down your spine at his touch, drawing his playful gaze as his eyes glinted mischievously. Your breath hitched when his other hand brushed against your bottom lip, sending warmth flooding through your body as his touch became more intimate, exploring you with quiet intensity.
âDo I make you nervous?â he teased with a devious grin.
âI guess you do,â you admitted, biting your lip bashfully.
âAnd why's that?â Logan asked, leaning in even closer. You could feel his breath against your lips, his nose brushing gently against yours.Â
Thereâs a moment of silence as Loganâs face moves closer and closer to your own, both unable to verbalise just how desperate either of you feel for each other.
His hands are warm as they wander all over your back, underneath the soft fabric of your pyjamas. Your eyes flutter close as you enjoy his attention. You feel yourself get lightheaded by his affection and by the close proximity of your bodies.
As your eyes remained locked with his, the intensity between you grew. You found yourself studying every detail of Loganâs faceâthe small moles scattered across his skin, his beautiful green eyes, the rough stubble along his jawline. Your gaze drifted from his eyes, down the slope of his nose, until you were irresistibly drawn to his lips. His mouth looks so inviting.
How much youâve dreamed of having them on your own.
You swallowed dryly at the intensity behind his eyes, your heart beating madly in your chest. A flare of heat rushed to your cheeks as you resolved to reveal the truth. You didnât want to keep it from him any longer, especially with him looking at you as if he was about to devour you.
âB-because Iââ you finally spoke as you stumbled over your words. You felt weak in his presence, but in the best way imaginable. Heat spreads through your body, a feverish sensation overwhelming your senses. Your heart raced, refusing to calm down, and your limbs trembled uncontrollably. It wasnât the kind of fever that came with illness, but a warmthâtingling, like anticipation coursing through your veins. You whimpered as the same warmth settled between your thighs. âI need y-yoââ
Before you could finish your sentence, his lips crashed onto yours, kissing you with an intensity and passion that left you trembling and helpless, while soft whimpers escaped your throat. Heâd tug your body fully closer against his own as his mouth claimed yours.
All your thoughts overwhelmed your brain, disabling any rational understanding of what was going on. Gradually, you leaned into Logan, melting into his embrace. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders and kissed him back.
Logan groaned as he continued to kiss you with a fierce intensity, giving everything he had. You felt his tongue tracing your lips slowly. Knowing what he wanted you parted your mouth slightly, allowing him to slip his tongue inside and swirl it around yours.
You absorbed all his passion, savouring the warmth of his closeness and the sensation of his rough yet soft hands holding you tightly. You didnât want to ask how this was happening, nor did you dare question whether it was real or just a dream.
One of his hands roamed over the bare skin of your back beneath your pyjama shirt, leaving goosebumps in his wake, while the other explored the tender curve of your neck. He held you with such tenderness as his mouth continued to move ferociously against yours.
You whimpered against him as warmth and wetness continued to pool between your thighs, your pussy throbbing as his voice rumbled with a chuckle. âYou okay there, kitten?â he asked softly, his voice low as his lips brushed against your jaw.
You knew he could smell your arousal, knew he could hear how fast your heart was beating. You bit your lip, trying to stifle another sound, and you tried to bury your face into his chest, feeling the heat spreading across your face and body. Logan was having none of that, his lips quickly reunited with yours. He groaned softly, a deep rumble in his chest, as you trailed your tongue out to seek purchase in his mouth, and he opened for you without hesitation. His hands gripped at your waist and brought your body flush against his.
You wanted Logan to consume your very being. Claim you as his completely.
Soft little noises of pleasure kept leaving your mouth as he continued to kiss you. His lips pressed against yours, guiding the kiss with a gentle control that made you melt into his embrace. You surrendered completely, letting him lead as you revelled in the sensation. He was so good at kissing that all you wanted was to stay in this moment with him forever.
He pulled away after what felt like hours to breathe, his warm pants fanning across your heated face. He was still holding your face with one hand, and his thumb on your cheek moved a little, stroking your skin with so much tenderness. Murmuring against your lips, he said, âIâve wanted to do this for so long. I love you so much.â before delving back in for more.
You whimpered as he nipped at your bottom lip, then gently swiped his tongue over it to soothe the sting. You gasped, and Logan seized the moment to explore the inside of your mouth with his tongue once again. As the kiss grew more heated, you moaned, feeling lightheaded and dizzy.
Surprisingly, you completely forgot about the storm thatâs raging outside.
Logan devoured you, pouring all his love into you and claiming your mouth and kissing you with so much passion, your body shuddered with want, from the need for him. He moved his lips with yours and swirled his tongue with your own. His hand then moved to tangle in your hair as he pressed his body to yours completely.
Your hands moved to bury in his hair as well. When you pulled at his hair it was a bit rougher than you intended to and it tips his head all the way back and he lets out a loud, wanton moan that makes your whole body flush with arousal. You whined as he finally pulled away, as he left your body flush and panting and craving so much more.
His mouth then moved from your lips to your cheeks as he whispered his love for you again and again. He started trailing long, hot kisses down your jaw and neck. You whimpered pitifully as he suckled lightly on the side of your neck, tilting your head back instinctively to bare more of your soft skin to him.
âFuck, baby, youâre everything.â He groaned as he bit down gently on the junction of your neck and shoulder. You cried out, impulsively grinding your hips against his own, desperately searching for some much needed friction against your throbbing clit. âYouâre mine.â Heâd growl against your skin.
You gasped, your eyes flying open when you felt his erection pressing against your pussy. You moaned as your core started clenching around nothing, begging for some attention, his attention.
Logan groaned as you continued to grind against him, grasping your hips into his hands to halt your movements. You whined in protest, as he then rolled you both over, hovering above you as he pinned your arms gently against the mattress.
âSo needy.â He chuckled as a devious smile would grow on his face. âDoes your sweet little pussy want some attention?â He grinned when you whimpered underneath him, before he continued. âI can always smell how much you need me.â He growled before he rolled his hips against yours again. âThis virgin pussy is always begging for me to fill her.â
You didnât have time to become embarrassed as high pitched whimpers slipped past your lips as he continued to grind against you. Youâve craved this man so bad, and now that he was yours you didnât want to hold back anymore. He intertwined your hands together as he moved his big straining and clothed cock against your now soaked panties.Â
âLove those little noises you make for me, such a good girl.â He moaned against the skin of your neck as he pressed open mouthed kisses and licks across your skin.Â
You whined as he gave you a particular hard thrust. You could feel how massive he felt as he rubbed his cock against your clothed folds. You couldnât deny that it made you nervous but all you could think about was that you needed and wanted him to take you so bad. More wetness would pool down your heated cunt as you fantasise about him filling your tiny pussy with more than just his cock. âAh, n-need yo-you LoâŠâ
Suddenly everything became overwhelming, the temperature in the room rising quickly, the feel of his thick cock thrusting against you, the feel of his touch as it wandered all over your skin and the fact that you were going into a foreign but intimate territory with your best friend had you feeling hot all over.
His features softened as he took in how overwhelmed and flustered you looked. He slowed down his movements and one of his hands would move to hold your face as he slowly leaned down to peck your lips. âYouâre okay baby girl, Iâve got you. I will take good care of you.â He whispered against your lips. His low voice sent a new wave of arousal down your body. âTell me what you need, kitten.â
âYou, I need you, Logan. I've always only needed you,â you whimpered against his lips as you reconnected them. His hands gently caressed your thighs, and your mind became hazy with intense lust and overwhelming love for him. Your brain instantly turned into mush as you continued to kiss each other passionately.
The kiss then increased with an intensity that had you gasping for breath. You rolled your hips into his, rubbing your throbbing clit against him for some friction against your core. You moaned into his mouth as you rubbed against him. The front of his sweatpants strained as he moved along with you.
As you kept losing yourself in the kiss, you felt his hands wander up your thighs up to the hem of your shirt. His fingers brushed delicately over the sides of your ribs, moving up and down your skin repeatedly, his fingertips mapping out every dip and curve as they wandered all over your skin.
âYou're beautiful,â he whispered against your lips, admiring you, making you glance up at him shyly from beneath him. He pulled away just slightly only for him to hold the hem of your shirt, and you could tell what he was about to ask before he opened his mouth. You bit your lip and nodded vigorously, causing him to chuckle breathlessly. âYou want me to take this off?â He questioned as he tugged at the fabric gently.Â
You nodded bashfully, unable to use or trust your voice during that moment.Â
He smiled softly, his hands gently brushing under your shirt before hooking his fingers into the fabric. Slowly, he lifted it, and you raised your arms to help him slip it off.
You felt heat rising on your skin the way his eyes roamed all over you, taking in every little detail. The way Logan was looking at you, eyes filled with nothing but love, adoration and lust, made you feel so alive.
He discarded the piece of clothing to the side and began mouthing along your collarbone with affection. You trembled underneath him as he showered you with his attention. âYouâre so beautiful,â he whispered repeatedly as his mouth travelled all over your exposed skin.
His large hands moved to the curve of your waist where it met your hips and clutched it, holding you tight as he littered damp kisses and nips to your shoulders and any skin along the way down to your breasts. You whimpered as he traced the tip of his nose over the swell of your breast.
He smirked as he looked up at you, breathing in through his nose as he inhaled your scent and you couldnât help but shiver when he exhaled warmly through his mouth and onto your nipple. âFuck, baby girl, youâre so hot.â
Then, he wrapped his lips around one nipple, teeth just skimming your skin as he sucked and licked with passion.
âL-Lo,â you mewl as you try to grind your hips against him, your cunt seeking friction as it throbs with need.
âFeeling good kitty?â He quipped back as he grins up at you. You felt your skin flush with heat as you just stared down at him. Lust was written all over your face and he had no trouble reading your expression. So he resumed licking, long, lavishing licks with the flat of his tongue over your pebbled nipple as the other hand which was occupying your other breast, travelled all the way down to your panties.Â
As his fingers slipped underneath the band of your lacy underwear, down to where you needed him the most, his mouth fell open to unleash a loud groan onto your nipple as he felt your wetness, sliding his fingers between your soaked folds.
He explored your wet cunt patiently. Heat overwhelmed your senses as Logan continued to litter soft kisses all over your chest. Your hands found his head, running your fingers through his hair as his mouth continued to wander all over your naked skin.
Loganâs lips moved slowly down your body, kissing every little place he could find on your skin while his hands traced along.
Soon, he would retreat his hand from your heat, leaving you a whimpering mess. He then leant forward, his face meeting your sex, breathing in the smell of your pussy, running his nose against the damp patch on your underwear. You whimpered as he inhaled your scent. âFuck kitten,â he growled as he couldnât seem to stop smelling you. âThis pussy smells so good, I canât wait to taste ya.â
A devious smile played on Loganâs lips as he looked up at you through his eyelashes. âI am sure you taste just as good as you smell, if not better.â He groaned before taking your underwear between his teeth, while pulling it off your legs slowly. A shuddering breath left your lips, speechless as you watched him take off your lacy panties, becoming needier the longer you watched him. Logan kept looking at you as he slid down your body, pulling it off of you when it reached your ankles.
Once he took them off completely he gently pushed your legs wide for him, whimpering as the air hit your wet slit. He took a moment as his eyes took over you, your glistening centre clenching around nothing as he continued to stare at your wet hole. The man between your legs would moan at the sight. Not much later, Logan smirked as he kissed all the way up to your leg, taking his sweet time to give your body the attention you deserved. He pressed soft kisses from your ankles up to your knees, his hands moving along with his mouth, caressing the insides of your thighs as he gradually moved up your legs.
His lips lingered on your thighs, licking and sucking some kisses on your soft skin, Loganâs lips were so close to where you needed him the most yet he felt so far away.
âSo pretty,â he murmured as he guided your legs over either of his shoulders.
You were about to beg as his lips detached from your thigh, only for moments later to feel him nuzzling against your pussy, smearing your juices across his lips and opening you up to his skilled tongue.
You gasp and squirm at the contact of his wet tongue.
He then pulls back for a second, âpussy tastes so good,â he moaned before his fingers moved to spread your outer lips for him. âBut I think I'm gonna play with my girl for a bit.â Logan smiled as he slid a finger inside of you, watching the way your body squirmed at the sensation, moaning against the pillow next to you as you tried to muffle yourself.
You moaned as he moved his thick and long finger inside your tight walls. âSo wet for me baby girl, youâre literally dripping on my finger,â he said before he pressed some kisses on your pubic bone, making you buck your hips in response. âEasy, kitty, we have all night.â
âL-Logan, please please I need more. Need your mouth and just. More. Pleaseeee need you so baââ your whining got cut off the moment you felt his lips wrap around your clit, sucked it into his mouth, coaxing a loud but broken moan out of you. âF-Fuck!â
You felt like screaming, you didnât know what to do with your hands, feeling so lost and overwhelmed with the pleasure Logan was giving you already. He dove between your legs, licking a stripe up through your folds and teasingly dipping his tongue into your entrance along with his finger before he travelled up to your clit, spreading your lips with his wet appendage before sucking your button into his mouth.
The whine that came out of you only drove Logan to seek out more of those heavenly sounds. As his one single digit pumped in and out of you, you couldnât help but appreciate that his fingers felt so much more pleasurable and thicker than your own. As bliss overwhelmed your senses, you felt your whole body start to tremble.Â
Your core began clenching around his finger, begging for more. He pumped his finger in and out of you at a leisurely pace. Instinctively you tried moving your hips, slowly, grinding against his hand and mouth as he moaned. He gave you an intense look as he continued to fuck you with his finger. His eyes couldnât seem to stay in one place as he admired how beautiful you were underneath him.
You were panting heavily, barely able to think straight, your mind turning hazy as he slowly slipped a second finger inside your tight channel.Â
Logan moved them slowly at first as your pussy tried to adjust to the addition. The stretch was overwhelming but oh so satisfying. Little whimpers left your lips as he fucked you with his fingers. He moved his face back to meet yours, engulfing you in a passionate kiss, swallowing all your little mewls.
You gasped, his tongue slipped inside your mouth, kissing you with so much passion, giving you everything he had to offer. âThat feels good doesn't it, princess?â Logan groaned as his thumb made contact with your clit. You bucked your hips and nodded quietly. âUse your words pretty girl,â he taunted while he curled his fingers inside you as he played with the sensitive spot inside you.
âYes, please please Lo, feels⊠so good.â You moaned loudly.
Soon his lips travelled all the way down your body as whines and whimpers left your trembling lips, silently begging for more â all while he was still finger fucking you.
Logan inhaled your scent as soon as he leaned forward, but didnât let you wait in anticipation much longer. He wet his lips before his head dipped between your legs, warm tongue licking a slow stripe across your outer lips, all the way up to your button.
âAh, fuck!â You cried out, your hips bucking off the mattress.Â
Squeaky, senseless noises bubbled up from your throat wantonly. Your hips stuttered against him and he just sighed like there was nothing in the world he'd rather do than this, eating you out on your bed.
You were a mess of his name, chanting and stuttering over and over again like a prayer. Your eyes squeezing shut to the point of tears, his mouth licked up your clit, as he continued to finger you while one of his other hands was holding your hip, pinning you to the soft sheets as you bucked into him, trying to urge him to do more.
The way he build up your arousal by pumping his fingers in and out of you, curling up ever so slightly to find the spongy spot inside of you. The familiar coil in your belly continued to build up as Logan suckled on your sensitive bud. Your abdomen tightened as he began quickening his pace again, his fingers hitting into that sweet spot with precision, had your toes curling as you clenched your thighs around his head.
Logan was lapping at you with determination, moving his fingers continuously as he slowly got you to the edge.
âOh, myââyou whimpered, trembling digits sinking half into his brown hair and the other against your teeth, as you tried to silence yourself. âFuck, aahh Logan, f-fuckâŠâ
He moaned against you as his lips sealed around your clit and you bucked your hips at the action. Warmth spread throughout your whole body as he began talking you through it. âFuckinâ- you taste so good. Feels so good. Youâre just⊠everything.â
You whimpered as he continued. âCome on,â he grunted as he pumped his fingers faster in and out of you. âCome on baby, cum for me.âÂ
âAh, d-daddy,â You gasped loudly as your whole body trembled even more, the hot familiar feeling continued to spread all over your body, your body tingling, your hips moving at their own accord against Loganâs hand and face. Totally unaware of the word that slipped past your lips as your body tensed as he called you âa good girlâ and shortly after you came against his mouth and around his fingers.Â
âThatâs my girl.â
Your whole mind felt like exploding and all you could see were stars. You felt so overwhelmed by the amount of pleasure and emotions you were experiencing. Your body still trembled as you felt yourself come down from your high.
As you slowly came back to your senses you felt him gently pull his fingers out of your pulsing hole. But you still felt Loganâs mouth on you, licking and sucking at your pussy and it didnât feel like he was gonna stop any time soon. You whined as he moaned against you while he licked against your tight entrance, licking up your release, his tongue prodding your slick hole.
ââS too much.â You whimpered at the overstimulation.
Logan ignored your pleas, moaning against your heat as he continued to eat you out. The man you adored so much between your legs kept sliding his tongue up and down your sensitive slit. Your little mewls and other noises of ecstasy spurred him on, to move his lips back up to your clit, sucking the nub softly between his lips.Â
âYou love having daddy eat your sweet pussy donât you?â He smirked, looking up at your flustered and embarrassed face as he continued licking your soaked cunt. âNo need to be embarrassed, baby. I like it.â
The walls of your pussy clenched furiously, the empty feeling inside you intensifying with every lick, and as your wetness trickled out of you, your core practically begged him to fill it up.
âOh sweet girl.â Logan tutted as you began grinding your hips against his face as moans kept spilling from your lips. âYouâre so sensitive, kitten.â He chuckled as he pressed a kiss to your clit.Â
Eventually he leaned down, finally slipping his tongue into your entrance, he curled the muscle upward to brush your walls, the sight of your fingers bunching the fabric of the sheets in a tight grip encouraged him to do it again and again.
Writhing below him, you felt him lick up and press against a sensitive spot inside that had you seeing stars, while your hips bucked against his face uncontrollably. Your fingers moved once again, gripping onto his dark hair rather harshly as you pushed your hips against his face shoving his tongue deeper inside your hole.
âPlease,â you begged. ââM close.â
âPlease what?â He taunted as he continued to lick your heat.
âP-please,â you stuttered and paused before finishing timidly. âDaddy.â
âGood girl,â he said before plunging his tongue back inside you as his thumb came up to press against your little bundle of nerves. Moments later, the tension snapped inside your lower tummy, cumming with a loud whine, your hips stuttered as your vision blurred. You cried out his name, your voice unable to remain steady.Â
Your hips stuttered until the final waves of aftershock pass. As you slowly came back down to reality again while you tried to catch your breath, you heard him praising you softly while he continued to lap at your wetness gently. You whined and nudged him away with your leg, only to react with a chuckle.
âTaste so good, baby. Could eat your sweet pussy all day.â He grinned as he licked the wetness off his mouth. Logan smirked, holding eye contact with you as he brought his glistening fingers to his mouth.
You giggled as he licked his fingers clean, feeling slightly embarrassed by the action. Trying to hide your flushed face, you lazily raised your hands to cover it, but Logan wasnât having any of it. With a gentle smile, he placed tender kisses all over your hands, pulling them down slowly. Then, he leaned in closer, pressing sweet kisses to your nose, your forehead, and both your cheeks before finally capturing your lips. Each kiss was playful, filled with warmth, as laughter bubbled softly between you, his grin widening against your mouth.
He pulled away with a satisfied sigh, a warm smile spreading across his face as he reached to touch the side of your neck, tracing his fingertips up and down.
You exhaled as you melted at the feel of his touch and kissed his thumb as it came to trace across your lips. Your shaky legs wrapped around his hips, and with a playful gleam in your eyes, you gave his thumb a tender lick, holding his gaze as you rubbed your still sensitive heat against his clothed cock.
âF-fuck, you canât just do that kitten.â He groaned as his hands came to hold your hips, stilling your movements.
You whined, pouting as you looked up at him. âWhy not?â
âItâs hard to control myself around you.â He grunted as he started grinding his cock against you. Your gaze wandered downward, following the line of the vein near his V-line as it disappeared beneath his grey sweatpants. You couldnât help but whine underneath him as he continued to grind his covered cock against your growing wetness. You gasped after giving you a particular hard thrust, thatâs when you realised and felt he wasnât wearing any underwear underneath them. He felt massive. âIâve been trying to control myself for years. I think Iâd have to control myself a bit longer.â
âW-why?â you hiccuped as he kept rutting his hips into yours.
âDonât wanna hurt ya.â He mumbled, as his cock strained against his sweatpants.
âBut I know you wonât.â You said, your voice steady, filled with all the confidence you could summon. You watched as his jaw clenched, his grip tightening slightly as he held himself back, resisting the urge to just take you like he always wanted.
âHow are you so certain?â His breath hitched when you tightened your legs around him.
âI-I, because I trust you.â You continued to stutter as you both rolled your hips against each other. His eyes darkened with desire, but you could tell he was trying to restrain himself, fighting against what he truly wanted, even though the tension between you was nearly unbearable. Still, you held his gaze, unwavering. âBecause you love me.â
Logan groaned, his eyes squeezing shut as he fought to keep control, every muscle in his body tense with the effort. You could see the conflict etched across his face, the battle between what he wanted and what he was trying to hold back. His grip on you tightened slightly, a sign of the restraint still lingering in him, though it was slowly slipping away. His breathing was ragged, and for a moment, you thought he might give in. But then, he swallowed hard, forcing himself to stay still, clinging to the last shred of restraint that hadnât left him yet. âYou donât know how hard this is,â he muttered through gritted teeth, his voice thick with desire. âHow difficult itâs been, every day since I met you, trying to hold back while being around you.â
âI think I do, Logan,â you whispered, gazing up at him. âMaybe not in the exact way you feel it, but Iâve struggled too, convincing myself daily that I could never have you. And now, realising I couldâve had you from the startâitâs almost unbearable.â You bit your lip, noticing how his expression softened. âThatâs why I donât want us to hold back anymore. I donât think I can endure it any longer. Please, I need you, Logan. I love you, and Iâll always want youââ
Your words were cut off as Logan surged towards you, cupping your face as he kissed you passionately. His lips moved fervently against yours, as if he was trying to make up for every moment of restraint. Making up for any lost time. The intensity of his kiss made your head spin, your heartbeat quickening as you melted into his embrace. His hands then started roaming around your body, his hold on you tightening occasionally, pulling you closer, while his breath grew heavy as you felt every emotion as he kissed you. You clung to him, pouring out every feeling and emotion out with every heated kiss.
âI love you,â Logan murmured between tender kisses, breathlessly whispering your name.
Your own hands began wandering all over his body and eventually down his solid chest until your fingers met his abdomen, slipping momentarily underneath the waistband of his sweatpants. With a mix of urgency and desire, you tugged at them while whimpering underneath him as you continued to kiss him deeply.
âJust relax, baby. Iâve got you,â he whispered softly after pulling away from the kiss. He eventually took it upon himself to slowly peel back, shuffling a bit to rid himself of the last piece of fabric on his body. He tossed it aside, fully exposing himself to your hungry eyes.
Your breath hitched, your eyes wide. Fuck, he was massive. Long and thick in all the right ways. Just as you thought, the vein between his V Lines moved down to his cock. A spark of heat shot down to your pulsing core as you imagined how he would fit or fill you up. But it was also accompanied by a twinge of nerves.
Logan chuckled as he moved closer to you, his lips chasing your own as he enveloped you in another sweet but deep kiss.Â
The two of you kissed languidly for a moment, treasuring the heat of each other's bodies as your lips slot together with ease, but soon enough the kisses become deeper, more frantic and hands start to grip tighter and legs tangling together.Â
It's like you're both starved, this insatiable hunger for each other.Â
You couldnât help but roll your hips against his to feel his thick cock. You whined as it turned slick as you kept grinding yourself against him, and he had no trouble gliding his hips against you and rutting it into your clit.
You gasped openly into his mouth, desire growing quickly. You were so wet. Logan swallowed your whines with his lips against yours, hips rolling against you. He kissed you full with fervour, his grip on you intensifying heatedly.
He held his length in his hand as he kept rubbing the head of his cock from your entrance, up to your clit, circling until you were squirming underneath him, and back down. The thought of his thickness finally entering your pussy made you wetter by the second, turning you more on. Logan swallowed your little mewls with his mouth, his hips rolling with yours.
You were trembling against him, full of anticipation. His body covered your whole body with his. You writhed against him, wishing he was just in you already and filling you up and consuming you with pleasure once again.
âP-please, Logan.â You stuttered, your body trembling underneath him as you waited for his next move.Â
Logan hummed as he concentrated while circling your clenching hole teasingly. You arched your back slightly as you whined, silently begging to finally fill your pussy the way youâve always wanted him to do.
âRelax, baby girl.â He whispered after he licked and kissed underneath your ear.
âPlease d-daddy, I-I need you.â You whimpered in anticipation. Logan would grunt loudly before nudging the tip of his cock against your soaked hole. Your legs trembled underneath him, a mix of nerves and excitement. âWant you to fill this little pussy. Need you t-to fill it with more than your cock. N-need your cum.â You whispered seductively against his ear as his last bit of restraint snaps.Â
At your words, Logan gradually put more pressure on your entrance making you whimper underneath him, once he finally slid his tip inside you, a gasp elicited from the both of you.
Youâre aware this was just barely the tip of him, but you couldnât help but feel the stretch burn already. Logan slid in so slowly it was agonising. You cried out as he gradually pushed more of his pulsing cock inside your own clenching hole. He was so big.
You tangled your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck, pulling slightly as you whined underneath him. He panted along with you, his warm breath fanning over your face while he kept his forehead pressed against yours. The stretch stung, but his pace kept it bearable. He guided himself a centimetre further, then another, another, until you were digging your nails into his scalp, a gasp spilling from your lips.
His hips stilled instantly once he heard the pained noises falling from your lips. Tears began to prickle at your waterline, a combination of discomfort and the overwhelming feelings that were coursing through you.
âDoing so good for me baby,â he praised as he peppered your face with gentle kisses. âYouâre doing so good for me.â
âPlease,â you whimpered as your eyes fluttered close.
Logan continued to move almost painfully slow, letting you adjust to every centimetre of him. After a couple of seconds you were able to relax more into it. You whimpered, clutching his shoulders at the stretch, the heat in your abdomen growing as your walls fluttered around him, pleasure beginning to bloom in your stomach.
âSo fullâŠâ you whined.
âSuch a good girl,â he grunted softly. You think there wasnât a possibility to get more wet but as he utters those words you felt your heat get even more wet. He leaned down as he kissed your lips gently, as he filled you up bit by bit. He hoped the sweetness of his embrace would soften the sting.
Youâre trembling as you canted your hips up, begging for him to fill you to the brim, while you gripped the bedsheets between your fingers. âPlease Lo, need more. I can take it, daddy.â You whimpered as you involuntarily and repeatedly tightened around his thick cock.
He groaned at your desperate whines, losing his composure momentarily as he thrust the rest of his length all the way inside your tiny hole. The head of his dick kissing your cervix once he bottomed out. You cried out as you were trembling underneath him, trying to adjust to his size while your pussy kept pulsing around his cock.
âFuck, so fuckinâ tight.â He hissed as he let you adjust to his cock.Â
His lips came to press soft and tender kisses all over your face as he let you relax. Tears brimmed at the corners of your eyes as you continued to adjust around him. You felt so full, as if he was made for you, and only you. The feeling of him filling you up so completely had you seeing stars and digging fingernails into his shoulders. You felt one of his hands finding your hand, lacing them with yours as the other one reached up to your face.
His breathing was heavy as you squeezed his cock repeatedly. Small whimpers left your lips as you squirm underneath him.
You needed more.Â
You hadnât even realised your eyes had drifted shut until you slowly opened them, gazing up at Logan with a soft, pleading look. âPlease, Logan.â
âWhat do you need, sweetheart?â he murmured, his voice a low rumble that vibrated deep in his chest.
âNeed more.â You whispered.
âAww, does my sweet girl need me to move?â he teased, tilting his head with a playful smirk.
âNeed you, please.â You begged as your pussy clenched around his thick cock rather hard which made him groan above you. âPlease, I need you to fuck me so bad.â
His breath hitched as he exhaled shakily, before nodding quietly. Slowly, he started moving inside you, gentle but deep. One hand reached down to play with your clit, while the other one went to intertwine your fingers together, holding your hand tightly.Â
The sting hurt for a while, but it easily morphed into a more pleasurable feeling as he moved against you. Youâre so overstimulated from all your previous orgasms that the sensation he was giving you was mixed between pain and pleasure.
He grunted as he dropped his head to your ear to kiss and lick at the sensitive skin just below it. Soon enough the pain would completely disappear and all you could feel was pure bliss.
Slowly, you were getting used to his girth, anticipating it every time he pulled out of you before moving forward. Your legs are splayed open on either side of his hips as he ground his cock into you. The angle was so good, gradually he would pick up his pace, leaving you a whimpering mess underneath him. As he fucked into you in languid strokes, the sound of slick skin and your noises of pleasure could be heard in your bedroom.
âHow do you feel?â he whispered against your ear.
âFeels so good.â You moaned as you tightened around his cock, this time voluntarily.
You whimpered as he picked up the pace, angling himself in a certain way inside you. He finally leaned down to wrap his arms around you, the action elicited a gasp out of you as you grab at the sheets around you, as he fucked you harder and faster.
Every time heâd thrust inside you, his pelvic bone would drag along your throbbing clit, making you cry out his name in pure ecstasy.Â
âYouâre taking me so well, sweet girl. Doing so so, good for me.â He whispered against your skin as he moved to nuzzle his face against your neck.
Soft grunts fell from Loganâs lips whenever he hit a specific deep spot inside you. You whimpered as his lips moved back up to your lips, enveloping them in a heated kiss. You melted completely against him, holding you close to him as he fucked you. He snaked one of his hands down between your conjoined bodies finding your clit as he rubbed two fingers over the sensitive nub.
At a certain point you felt him slide into a pressure point in your core and coupled with the way his fingers circled your clit, it had you clenching like a vise around his dick. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head from the pleasure he was providing you. The whimpers that fell from your lips became higher pitched as he picked up his pace.
âFeeling good, kitten?â He groaned, as his lips curled into a mischievous smile as he admired the way your face twisted in pure bliss. Too overwhelmed by the new experience. Filth and praise continued to come out of his mouth as he fucked you. âThis pussy was made for daddy.â
His mouth covered your own instead as he swallowed all your little noises of pleasure, you could feel the tightness return in your belly, the tight coil that pulls tighter with every movement and every touch.
Your whimpers, gasps of pleasure and pants increased as ecstasy and warmth overwhelmed your senses.
âTaking daddyâs cock so well, baby.â
His hands couldnât get enough of you, sliding around your hips and lower back, wanting to feel all of you, touch you everywhere. You whimpered at the feeling of his speed, feeling another orgasm coming so close, eyes tightly shut and legs locked bruisingly around Loganâs hips. He could feel it too, in the way you clenched and squeezed around his length, and he began to drive even harder into your pussy as he tilted his hips gently, searching for the one place that he hoped would blow your mind.
âAh, daddyââ you hiccuped as he fucked you so good you felt like a blabbering mess. âNeed you to come inside my pussy...â
âIs that what you want?â He growled as you pulsed around him. âCanât believe it⊠itâs your first time and youâre already begging for me to cum inside. So filthy. Youâre close arenât ya?â
You nodded furiously as your arms trembled as they wrapped around him, your nails digging in his back as he moaned on top of you. The feeling of the coil tightening in your belly, was tingling down to your legs, ready to snap at any moment.
âYouâre so beautiful,â he whispered, cursing under his breath when you purposefully tighten your walls around him. âBet youâd look even prettier with my cum inside your pussy. All full and messy.â
âPleaseâŠâ you moaned as you thought about him filling you up. âPlease Lo, baby, daddy⊠please fill this pussy up.â
He grunted as he buried his face into your neck as he fucked into you, making the whole bed rattle at his force.
âYou want to cum pretty girl?â
You nodded frantically at his words while your eyes fluttered close as you bit your lip harshly. You were bucking up beneath him, nails digging into his skin even more as his hand moved back to your clit as another came to intertwine your hands together, pinning them to the bed. He rubbed your clit with enough pressure to ensure youâll cum around him.
âCum for daddy.â Logan demands softly.
And when he finally nudged against that spot inside you coupled with his deep voiceâ you were exploding, shattering, and detonating all at once, as you cried out his name. Blood was rushing so wildly in your ears that you couldnât possibly hear the way you wail and sob as he crashed his lips onto yours, swallowing all your noises. Your head lolled back, your back arching violently as you twist and contort in pleasure underneath him.
âThatâs it, good girl.â Logan moaned in your ear as your walls spasmed and pulsed around his cock, begging him to cum inside, desperate for him to fill you up the way he promised.
âFuck,â he groaned, pushing himself up as he thrust deeper into you, the head of his cock hitting your cervix repeatedly. âYou want me to fill this pussy up? Make it all messy?â
You were still in a daze but you were able to understand him so you nod vigorously at his words, whining even more at the sensitivity. Your pussy squeezed around his cock in anticipation. âPleaseâŠâ
âFuck, take it baby.â It washed over him instantly, hips stuttering into you as he grew desperate, eyes squeezing shut when he felt his cock throb inside of you before hot spurts of his seed splashed along your walls, painting them in ribbons of white. The warmth of his seed filled you up and spread inside your pussy. The feeling made you whimper, limbs limp on the bed as he shallowly thrust into you, making sure you took every last drop.Â
His warm cum filled you up deeply, the mild heat of it settling deep inside you and causing you to squirm under him. Logan panted as he let his body slump against yours. He rested on top of you, trying to steady his breath. His cock was still nuzzled deep within you, still half hard as it kept his cum from leaking out.
It was a blurry haze when you came back to your senses, your whole body was aching whilst simultaneously feeling the most relaxed you've ever been, equally as exhausted as it was energised, and you didnât bother trying to question why. Just pure contentment.
Once both of you caught your breaths, Logan leaned his forehead against yours before kissing you tenderly.
âThat wasâŠâ He breathed, smiling tiredly at the complete dopey mess he's made of you; hair all over the place and eyes lidded heavily, heated skin glowing and your lips looking swollen from all the kisses youâve both shared.
âOh yeah, that was mind blowing.â Your voice came out hoarse, still recovering from the height and volume it had gone, and you cleared your throat gently before you smiled up at him.
âI love you.â He whispered before he captured your lips in a deep and lazy kiss. You could feel his soft mouth smiling against yours as you whimpered against him. You felt yourself melting against his embrace as he wrapped his arms around you.
âI love you too.â You whispered back against his mouth.Â
You shifted slightly when you felt that he was still hard inside you. Biting your lip, you squeezed purposely around him at the realisation. Logan groaned at the feeling, his large palms sliding up your sides in a soothing manner.Â
âDonât do that.â Logan grumbled but you saw a hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.
âWhy not?â You giggled as your hands trailed through his hair.
âMakes me wanna fuck you again.â Your boyfriend mumbled.
âHm, thatâs kind of the point.â You continued to giggle.
Logan chuckled as he pulled his head back, looking at you with a mirthful smile.
Before you knew it, he pulled out only to man handle your body in the position he wanted you to be. Manoeuvres your body until youâre on your tummy. His hands came to hold your hips, pulling them up, your ass in the air for him.
He kneads the flesh of your cheeks before spreading them apart for him. Your body slumps slightly forward with exhaustion but Logan is quick to grip your hips, holding you in the same position. âOh kitten, Iâm not done with you yet.â He tutted.Â
Your cheeks flushed with heat as you prepared yourself for a long night filled with passion.
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#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett smut#logan howlett#wolverine x reader#wolverine smut#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett x you#wolverine fanfiction#logan howlett fanfiction#logan howlett fluff#hugh jackman#hugh jackman smut#hugh jackman x reader#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine#wolverine x you#my writing
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For Cryinâ Out Loud
pairing: post-outbreak! joel miller x afab! reader
how to help the palestinians and what it means to write for the last of us characters
word count: 7.9k
description: living with joel is complicated, especially when you canât sleep due to nightmares. when you find yourself in his bed, you canât help yourself. but joel sure can. give him a day to mull it over.
warnings: pretty slow burn, kinda forced proximity, kinda angsty, unspecified age gap (donât like it, donât read it), joel gives you tons of nicknames (darlinâ, kiddo, etc.), discussions of nightmares and possible mental illnesses, some fluff, reader isnât really described, joel is kinda a gaslighter, heâs also a bit pervy, unprotected p in v (wrap it yâall), oral (f! receiving), dirty talk, joel like worships you!!!!!, joel licks his fingers clean, giving genitalia pronouns, joelâs a big boy. think thatâs it. lemme know what I missed!
authorâs note: I really enjoyed writing this. the idea is pretty simple but I love domestic jackson!joel. I promise iâll try to switch it up soon and write something that isnât jackson!era lol. support your fav fics by reblogging and commenting!! thanks love ya <3
For some reason, you always find yourself standing at the threshold of the front door when you cannot sleep.Â
The air was especially brisk tonight. You wrapped yourself in a gray chunky sweater you found in the lost and found in Jacksonâs thrift store, hoping to regain some warmth. Your bed may have been comfortable, but it was the place where nightmares usually plagued you.Â
It was too late to be awake, and you knew that if you were caught, you would hear it from Joel. He always reprimanded you. Every time he caught you up late, it was like your father woke up and found your hand in the cookie jar.Â
The dynamic between you two had changed since arriving in Jackson, and you almost resented him for it. When it was just you, him, and Ellie, you were managing a family unit. Joel was always the protective father, you being the mom or the voice of reason, and Ellie being chaos.Â
When Ellie and Joelâs relationship shifted, he took on a fatherly role for you. It bothered you. A lot.Â
In a moment of contemplation, you hear footsteps coming down the steps behind you.Â
Heâs wearing flannel pajama pants and no shirt, his hairy tummy something you did not see often.Â
âWhat are you doing awake?â He questions, his voice groggy with a twinge of annoyance.Â
You do not feel like explaining yourself, but you knew you wouldnât be able to get out of this situation without a justification.Â
You huff, leaning your back against the door frame so you can get a full look at the broad man. âCanât sleep. Thought staring into the darkness would help.â
He grunts, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. âHowâs that workinâ for you, sweetheart?â
You could not close your eyes without the haunting dreams that seemed lively and so real. Every night, you had the same recurring ones. You were being chased, hunted, or murdered. Or all of the above. You would wake in a cold sweat, not wanting to shut your eyelids ever again.Â
âHm,â You say, staring back outside for a brief moment, ââWas better when you werenât looking over my shoulder.â
He chuckles, âGet back to bed.â
âI canât, Joel.â
âYou can and will. Youâre no good when youâre tired.â
âIf I close my eyes, Joel, I will just have the same goddamn nightmares I have every night. And I will end up doing what Iâm doing now, which is trying to get some fresh air to forget them.â
âYouâre not gonna forget âem with some fresh air. You just need to⊠get over them.â
The breeze picks up as soon as he says it, almost like the world knew the tension would have to be broken with some frigid air. You retort with, âAnd how do you get over yours?â
"I just accept them," he says, a hint of defensiveness in his tone. "I don't have time to dwell on them. There's always more important things to worry about."
"I'm more tired in the morning when I just endure them." You explain, trying not to cry about it. But you are so sick of them. The same thing every night.
âI get it. One day they will subside, Iâm sure of it. But for now, you gotta-â
You just want him to shut up. At the same time, your mind is trying to remember the last time you did not have a nightmare. The memory makes your stomach churn. âYou remember that one time we were forced to share that sleeping bag? Back in Pittsburgh?â
âYeah,â His tone was wary, âWhat about it?â
"That was the first night I didn't have it." You explain, your voice a bit shaking at the insinuation. You donât want to face the fact that Joel, the man that you have known for going on 10 years, kept your nightmares at bay. The same man who continuously rejected you and told you that he was old enough to be your dad. The same man that told you no, I donât like you like that. I never will. That Joel.Â
âAnd? Why are you bringing this up now?â
"Because every night I go to my bed and I'm forced to face them alone. When you were there... they didn't even bother holding my mind hostage.â
He took another step closer, closing some of the distance between you two. He towers over you and you canât help but stare up at him in awe. Joel has always been a complicated part of your life. You consider him your sexual awakening, honestly, but he will never ever know that. Over the years, heâs only gotten more handsome.Â
But now, he has a curious expression written all over his face.
"Are you saying you want to share a bed with me?" he asks, his voice gruff and low.
You suck in a deep breath, not wanting to answer. You knew that was stepping over a boundary for Joel. He liked his space. He didnât like you impeding on that space, especially. Your bedroom was the furthest away from his for a reason.
"I don't know." You manage to say.
Joel's gaze darkened, his expression was completely unreadable. You wish you could read his mind, but you should be grateful you can not.Â
Because in Joelâs mind, heâs trying to formulate a way to convince you to stay away from him altogether. The wall he has built over the last decade was intentional. He did not want to hurt you any further. He already knew you had feelings for him, but he was an old man. He did not want to drag you into his mess, all the baggage he carried. He looked after you, he shared a home with you, and thatâs it. Strictly platonic.Â
He shifted on his feet a little, unable to tear his eyes away from you. You shook like a little leaf.
"You don't know?" he repeated, his voice a low rumble.
You nod, "I don't know if I want that."
You do want that. But you want more, too. You knew you would be playing with fire. You would just be disappointed.Â
Joelâs temptations are buried deep but they still fester every now and again. Some days he would catch a glance at you getting dressed in the crack of your door and have to take a cold shower. As soon as he felt those emotions bubble in his chest, he would try to distract himself. Maybe he would take a longer patrol. Maybe he would go to the Tipsy Bison and try to find a woman to take home. That one never really worked.Â
âWell, what do you want then? Because standinâ at the door and letting all the cold air in ainât gonna work for me or you.â
You look down at your picked-over fingernails and contemplate your next sentence. You don't want to be heartbroken in the morning when you wake up and he's there sleeping peacefully next to you and you're not... his.
"I want to sleep with you."
Joel was not expecting such a blunt response from you, but he appreciated you not beating around the bush about it. He gestures for you to step out of the doorway so he can shut the door, which you do.Â
He looked down at you, his eyes raking over your face, taking in the exhaustion and uncertainty.Â
"You sure?" he asked, his voice a gruff whisper.
You just nod as he locks the front door. You couldnât believe you were doing this.Â
Joel couldnât believe it either. Maybe it was the tiredness or the instincts he felt to protect you, but he was not mad at the idea of sharing his bed with you.Â
You signal for him to go upstairs, âYou lead the way.â
-
Joelâs room was always off-limits to you. So when you step into his small little world, you take it all in.Â
The artwork around the room was mainly nature landscapes. He had a big dresser right at the room's entrance with picture frames of Sarah, Ellie, and other family members. You were even included in one photoâa picture of you and him on some horses from last year.Â
A shirt littered one side of the bed, so you took that as it was probably his side. Unfortunately for you, it was the right side. You felt a pang of guilt realizing you would probably end up restlessly lying in Joelâs bed if you were stuck on the left.Â
Before he can pull back the blanket for himself, you stop him.Â
âUh, can I sleep on that side?â
He completely halts in his motions, turning his head towards you with a blank expression. âMy side? Why?â
You lick your lips, already regretting this whole thing.Â
âBecause I have had this superstition since I was a kid that I could only sleep on the right side of the bed."
Joel wants to laugh, but he doesnât. He can tell you are at war in your head about the question, your expression practically anticipating his rejection.Â
"Superstitions, huh?" he said, a hint of a smirk playing on his lips."You and your weird beliefs."
You watch as he crosses to the other side of the bed and lifts the blanket. Is he actually letting you have his side? Maybe he doesnât hate you.Â
âYou could also call it a compulsion, but superstitions seem more fun and less like a mental illness.â
He laughs this time, his deep chuckle making you feel a bit more relaxed about the situation. You did not feel like a burden as much. You walk to the right side and pull back his navy blue sheets and blanket. The spot looks warm and inviting so when you crawl in next to Joel, you start to realize that youâre back in the same situation you were in years ago in that sleeping bag. He was so close and warm and you wanted nothing more but for him to hold you and keep you comfortable.
But then another thing came to mind before you could imagine his arms around you.Â
You usually sleep on your right side or back, but now you don't know what to do because you didn't know how Joel slept.
"Do you sleep on your side or back?"
Joel studies you as you fidget beside him, your uncertainty causing him to smirk slightly. It was almost endearing, seeing you be completely out of control of your surroundings. He remembers back when you were traveling with him you had an obsessive need to straighten up everything before you fell asleep. You had to roll yourself up in your sleeping bag the same way every night.Â
"Usually on my back," he said finally. "But I can sleep on my side, too."
You swallow, trying to picture yourself sleeping. For some reason you felt the urge to have control of the situation, dictating exactly how he has to sleep, too. "Can I... I'll sleep on my side if you can sleep on your back? Is that okay?"
Joel had to suppress a smirk at your request. You knew he was trying to hold back a snarky remark. Instead, he surprises you.
"Sure, you can sleep on your side," he agreed, shifting his body weight onto his back, "ân I'll sleep on my back. No big deal."
You turn to face him, tucking the pillow further under your head. You can tell his eyes are heavy from exhaustion. You know it's time to shut up, to go to sleep, but you feel the need to say something else to him. Sometimes your brain concocts questions and statements and you know you shouldnât say them, but your mouth betrays you. Â
"When was the last time you had a girl in your bed?"
Why the fuck would you ask that? You think to yourself. It fell out of your mouth like drool.
Joel's eyes widened at your blunt question, surprise and a hint of embarrassment coloring his expression. You knew he was probably just expecting you to lay here next to him, maybe roll around a bit, then sleep. But instead, itâs an interrogation.
He took a deep breath, his mind rattling around as he tried to think of a response. He didn't want to admit what his genuine answer was to you, but he too could not help himself.
"Why do you want to know that?" he asks, his voice steely.
You hate that he even responded because now you needed to defend yourself.
"I uh, don't know. I don't know why it matters."
Joel chuckled softly, noting that you probably just had a case of word vomit. You always told him you were infamous for putting your foot in your mouth, especially in awkward situations.
"Curiosity got the better of you, huh?" he asks, rubbing his face with his hands. âYou just canât help yourself, sweetheart.â
He shifted slightly, rolling onto his side to face you, his gaze studying your expression.
You smirk, grateful that he's letting it slide. When he turns onto his side and he's at eye level with you, your face drops a bit. He is ruining the vision in your head. Heâs throwing a wrench in your plans.
"You're supposed to be on your back, sir."
Joel couldn't help but chuckle softly at your comment. He knew he was supposed to be on his back, but the new angle allowed him to see you better in the faint moonlight.
"Don't worry," he said, a hint of humor in his voice. "I'll turn back over in a minute. Just... enjoying the view for a bit."
You roll your eyes, lifting your hands from under the covers and lightly hitting his arm. You knew he was just fucking with you now.Â
"Okay, for that, I want to know the answer to my stupid question."
Joel let out a low laugh, the sound rumbling deep in his chest. He shook his head, amused by your persistence. You start to think about it and you have never really seen him bring anyone home. Maybe it had been a very long time and he was embarrassed.Â
"Alright, alright," he said, a hint of resignation in his voice. "Last time I had a girl in my bed..."
He paused for a moment, his eyes dropping to the covers, his mind racing to find the right words.
"Go on..."
Joel took another deep breath, his voice dropping even lower as he spoke.
"It's been a long time, kiddo," he admitted, his voice pierced with a bit of shame. "Almost ten years, if I'm being honest."
Your eyes widen in surprise. "No way... You've never just... got it on with someone in bed?"
Joel's face flushed with embarrassment at your blunt question, a mix of shock and slight irritation flashing across his eyes.
"Jesus, you really don't hold back, do ya?" he muttered. He shifts a bit, trying to get comfortable in a different way. He hadn't expected the conversation to turn so personal, so quickly and he did not want to face you anymore. He was mortified.Â
You mentally slap yourself in the face.
"I'm sorry, I am just tired and delusional. Uh, you don't have to answer that."
Joel could practically feel the humiliation radiating off you and he too felt the exact same way. You knew how to add to an already awkward situation.
"No, no, it's fine," he reassured you, his voice a bit gentler now. "I get it. You're tired, and your filter has taken a backseat."
"Yeah, exactly..."
He shifted on the bed, turning onto his back again, his gaze shifting to the ceiling, avoiding your curious stare.
You could not help but stare at his side profile. A prominent straight nose. His downturned lips are surrounded by some fine lines that show his age. He was a beautiful man now, but you canât help but imagine him back in his 20s. He had to have been a hit with the ladies back then.
Joel could feel your gaze on him, studying his face. And while you were not scrutinizing him, he felt like a commodity in a museum or something. He forced himself to keep his gaze on the ceiling, refusing to meet your eyes.
"So⊠ten years and no sex?â
You could seriously, not help yourself.
"Correct.â He grumbles, still not meeting your stare.
"Damn, Joel." You mutter, adjusting a bit to sit up a little more on your pillow. "I seriously thought you were sleeping around the whole time we have been in Jackson.â
He finally turns your way, a bit of offense on his face. âWhy would you think that?â
You shrug, not wanting to insult him. But thatâs how you formulated your grudge towards him. It was easy to just chalk everything up to problems with random women you have seen around town.Â
âYou just give off the energyâŠâ
âWhat?â
You huff, laying back on the pillow. âI donât know, Joel! I feel like when Iâm around you all the ladies think youâre handsome. They stare.â
âThey are staring because youâre always following me around and we arenât married or⊠together. They think we are odd.âÂ
You had never heard such things around Jackson, but it does sort of make sense. Everyone was probably just confused because you two lived together but were not a couple. You can admit it is bizarre, but it just did not feel like an option any other way, in your mind. So Tommy gave you two a bigger house and you set up separate rooms.Â
But in actuality, Joel secretly told Tommy that he did not want you too far from him. So when Tommy couldnât give you any other houses nearby, Joel just told him that you two would be roommates.
âWell fuck âem.â You mutter, trying not to sound too offended by the thought of people gossiping about you two.
Joel just nods. You settle by tucking your arm under your pillow. You yawn, the exhaustion now taking over your body. You watch Joel grab a pair of reading glasses from the side table and a book. You decide not to bother him, especially because he probably wanted to just read himself to sleep instead of being interrogated by you any further.
You close your eyes and eventually fall asleep. The deeper you get, Joel notices how your breathing pattern changes. When heâs finally ready to get some shut-eye as well, he watches as your body crawls closer to him. Your arm swings over his stomach and rests on his forearm. He is so shocked he does not move a muscle.Â
You adjust some more, not knowing what you are doing. Your leg creeps up and tucks right between his. You snuggle your face right into his chest. The only movement Joel decides to make is slinging his arm over your shoulders to pull you in tighter.Â
Itâs the first time in years that you two slept soundly, with no interruptions. No nightmares, no sudden intrusions, nothing. Silence and snores fill the room and thatâs it.
-
When you wake up, itâs slow and gradual. Your brain hardly computes that youâre laying on top of Joelâs shirtless frame, until your hand runs across his warm tummy.Â
You crook your neck up, looking at the handsome man you are spreading across.Â
His lips are slightly ajar, letting out hardly-there snores. They are so pretty and pink and you cannot help but touch them with feather-like fingertips. You would feel so guilty waking him up-
His eyes slowly open taking notice of your actions even though you tried not to stir him. Your eyes fly open in shock, but he does not seem very annoyed. He smiles.Â
âMorninâ darlinâ,â He says in a deep sleep-laced voice. You smile back at him, loving that he decided to call you the nickname you always got giddy over. You press your fingers into his chest before replying.
âI didnât have a nightmare.â
His hand comes up from your shoulders and tucks some hair behind your ear as he stares down at you, âThatâs good kiddo. Iâm glad you slept well.â
The intimacy is almost too much. The way this is how it would be if you woke up to Joel every morning. It sends your brain into overdrive and you force yourself to ruin it a bit.
âWoulda slept even better if you didnât talk so much in your sleep.â
Joel froze for a moment, his cheeks immediately flushing pink with embarrassment. He sits up a bit more, adjusting to the brighter lighting in his room. He knew he had a problem with talking in his sleep. Ellie used to talk about it all the time. He dreaded hearing what he was saying while curled up next to you.
"Uh... what did I say?" he asked, trying to maintain his composure.
"Something about it felt so good to be pressed up against someone, I don't know..."Â
You could not help yourself and started to laugh. You knew you were going to get a rise out of him.Â
Joel's face flushed an even deeper shade of pink as you started to laugh, clearly amused by your joke. He could feel his heart racing in his chest, his mind racing as he tried to come up with an excuse. He was just dreaming, it was not about you.Â
"W-what?" he spluttered out instead of making an excuse. "I didn't... I didn't say anything like that."
You have a shit-eating grin on your face and you press your hands on his chest to prop yourself up. You enjoyed watching him squirm.
Joel's eyes flickered down to your hands on his chest. He sickly thought they felt so right placed there. He imagined what you would look like fully mounting him.Â
He tried to keep his expression neutral, but you could see through his stone-cold exterior.
"You're messing with me, aren't you?" he grumbled, a hint of suspicion in his voice.
"Fully fuckin' with you." You giggle, hoping he is not really that mad at you.Â
âYouâre a brat.â
You move your foot slightly, running it up his leg. It sends shockwaves up his body, having you so close and moving around so seamlessly.Â
"No, you said something about how beautiful, alluring, and incredible I am. Said I was the girl of your dreamsâŠ"
"Yeah, right," he said, a hint of playful sarcasm in his voice. "You expect me to believe that?"
"So, you don't believe me?"
"No, I don't believe you," he says, his voice stern but playful. "I think you're a dirty little liar, trying to play me for a fool."
"A dirty little liar, huh? Well, it's good to know that you don't think I'm beautiful, alluring, and incredible." You giggle at his acknowledgment, knowing he caught you red-handed.
"Oh, I never said that," he smirked, a hint of teasing in his voice. "You are all of those things, darlinâ. But you're also a dirty little liar who likes to play games."
"So you think I'm beautiful?" You crack, the biggest smile painted on your face. You donât even care that heâs calling you a liar because it does not matter. Joel thinks you are beautiful.Â
ââCourse I do.â
You push yourself up onto your butt, sitting crisscross next to him. He secretly wishes you were still curled up on top of him.Â
âYou always this nice in the morning?â You ponder, your fingertips starting to toy with the hair on his stomach. He tries not to pay mind to it, letting you have full access to touch him.Â
But itâs driving him insane. The way you look freshly woken up, completely enamored with the idea of him calling you beautiful. You have some puffiness under your eyes and your lips are more swollen than usual.
âI am always nice to you.â
You let out a scoff, âNo, youâre not.â
He notices the shift in your tone and starts to get defensive, âNow youâre just lyinâ.âÂ
Joel always loved to gaslight you in these situations. You knew better than to let him get away with it, especially now. âNo there was that one time you told me you did not like me and that you would never like me. How you are old enough to be my dad-â
âBecause I am!â
And thereâs the wall. The only constant in you twoâs relationship. He was so good at throwing it up when feelings were being expressed. When vulnerability was presented, Joel could not help but reject it.Â
âAnd the worldâs fuckinâ ended, Joel! Big deal!â You almost yell, moving your hands from him.Â
Why does he already miss your hands?
He huffs, crossing his arms over his soft chest. âWe have had this conversation for the last 10 years.âM not sure why we keep rehashing it.â
âAnd every time you turn me down itâs another fuckinâ stab in the heart.â
âYou know why we canât,â He practically growls. You can not stand to even look at him anymore with your bitterness and irritation taking over.Â
âWhatever, Joel.âÂ
As soon as you say it, youâre already leaving his room and heading to your own. When you slam the door, you hope you have made your point. You want to scream and punch a hole in the wall, but instead you just furiously stomp around the room and grab your clothes. You had patrol at noon, so you needed to get to the mess hall before breakfast was over. You try not to cry as you strip down and get dressed.
Joel sits in bed, reeling. He hates that it has become a conversation every six months. He hated that rejecting you always sent you into a spiral of hating him for extended periods. Itâs not that he did not want you, it was simply just not in the cards. He was too old to be in love. He was too old to play house with you. He just could not submit to the idea of leading you on, especially because you had so much more life to live.Â
He finally works up the courage to get out of bed and put on some clothes. He opts for putting on his typical jeans and thick flannel. It was getting colder and he knew by the end of the winter, you would end up with half his flannels anyway, so he had to enjoy them while he had them.Â
You storm downstairs, going to the back door for your boots when you spot him in the kitchen.Â
âYou got pat-â
âYes.â You respond quickly, shoving your foot into your shoes. He stands behind you with a mug full of tea, watching your every move.Â
âWho are you-â
âJesse.â
He was asking his usual questions, which you were not in the mood to answer.Â
âHey, can you-â
You snap your head back at him, giving him the glare you gave him as a warning usually. By now, he takes it as a hint and backs off. But not this time.Â
âCan I what?â
He rolls his eyes, âCan you fuckinâ not be a brat about this?â
You wish your glare came with knives. If that were the case, Joel Miller would be dead on his kitchen floor.Â
You are so thrown off by the question that you just watch him get angrier when you do not respond.Â
âAre you serious, right now?â You press, keeping your voice from cracking.Â
He brings the mug up to his mouth, taking an obnoxious sip. When he pulls the mug away, you notice how steaming it is. âYou always pull this shit-â
âNo, you do! You do this shit to me every fuckinâ time, Joel. You sweet talk me, make me feel comfortable, have me lapping everything up in the palm of your hands, and then you snatch it away. Then have the audacity to get mad at me!â
You are yelling now and it is throwing him off. Joel knows better than to interrupt you like you do to him. You were the kind of person who would calm down if you felt heard.Â
The way he knew you down to your core made this all so painful. Because if he was not so stubborn and true to his convictions, he would have fucked you the moment you touched his lips this morning.Â
âI ainât tryinâ to make this harder than-â âToo fuckinâ late.â
You think back to the moment last night when you knew you were going to hurt your own feelings by sleeping with him. You knew better, yet here you are, still blaming him for your stupidity.
He stands there, still holding his mug, staring you down like a wounded doe who got pierced with an arrow. He feels guilty like he misled you. Before he can say anything, you are lacing up your boots and leaving out the front door without another word.Â
-
All day long, Joel wanders around the house trying to get rid of the pit in his stomach. Nothing works. A shower. Reading a book. Cutting wood. As soon as he tried to use laundry as a distraction, he reached into his hamper and found one of your t-shirts. He held it close and smelled it, trying to wrap his head around how he got here.Â
You spend all day, silently fuming on horseback with Jesse. When he tries to get you to open up, you ice him out and tell him to focus on the trail in front of him.Â
You get back by sundown, the sun setting making it a lot chiller than you expected. You decide to take the long way home, wanting to avoid being home for as long as possible. You were not ready to face Joel, let alone share a space with him. But unfortunately, during your patrol, you fell into some mud and needed a shower. The more time it spent on your clothes and body, the grosser you felt.Â
You open the front door, announcing that you are home. It was a habit you and Joel developed after you both pulled guns on each other during late-night arrivals.Â
You hear Joel mumble something from the living room, but you do not stop to listen and continue on your way upstairs to the bathroom.Â
You strip down as soon as the door is closed, tossing your muddy clothing into a hamper in the corner. You would get them washed and hung as soon as you shower off.Â
You hear Joelâs footsteps creaking around the upstairs hallway as you scrub your body with homemade soap and warm water.Â
When you start to dry yourself off, you hear Joel grunting something in the hallway. You wrap yourself in a towel and peek your head out the door. Heâs on his hands and knees wiping something off the hardwood. âWhatâs goinâ on?â
He looks up at you, your body only covered in a bleach-stained blue towel. It makes his head spin. He canât even be mad that you tracked in mud.Â
He swallows, gripping the cloth heâs using tighter. âYou got mud everywhere.â
You step out, not even really thinking about the fact that you are not properly dressed in front of Joel. You were still mad at him, anyway. Who cares what he thinks?
âSorry, I couldâve cleaned it up.â
He returns to wiping the wood, âItâs fine, I got it, kiddo.â
You accept his response and move on to your room, but the draft you leave behind drifts to Joelâs nostrils. Your soap smells like lavender and it always sends his mind racing when you are fresh from a shower. He clears his throat, trying to get through the emotions filling his chest.Â
But itâs been like this all day. Youâre all around him even when youâre not physically here. How can he get away from you? Why is he trying to run in the first place?
Heâs on his knees in your hallway, cleaning up your mess, sniffing the air you leave behind because heâs fucking in love with you and he cannot help himself anymore.Â
Joel starts to think about how peaceful he felt having you next to him last night and how he would love to feel that way every night. For once heâs not thinking about what everyone else would think. For once heâs thinking selfishly and caving into every desire he has ever pondered about you. How would you feel under him? How would your lips feel pressed against his pulse point?Â
His body was on fire, thinking about you.Â
You are fiddling with some clothes in your dresser after you flick on the overhead light. You do not hear him come into your room behind you.Â
You are so wrapped up in your own thoughts that when he clears his throat to announce heâs in your room, you scream. Loud.Â
âFor cryinâ out loud, woman!âÂ
You grip your towel tighter when you turn and see him standing at your mercy.Â
âJoel, what the fuck?â You yell, gesturing to the fact that you are practically naked. He does not care, of course, and his ears are ringing from your piercing scream. He gathers himself as you shift back, trying to create some distance from him.
He is trying not to gawk at the fact that your grip on the towel against your chest is only pushing up your cleavage. Heâs biting back everything. âCan we talk?â
âTalk about what? The fact you crept into my room when I was trying to change? Are we past boundaries now?âÂ
You are pissed, trying not to rattle off another million things to discuss with him. Heâs only really talking about one thing.Â
He scoffs at your last statement. âBoundaries were already out the window when you crawled into bed with me last night.â
Silence fills the room as you completely stop breathing. The anger you originally felt dissipates.Â
âJoel-â
âI ainât doinâ this back and forth anymore,â He starts shifting in his spot, unsure if he really should be doing this. âI canât live how I've been livinâ. Somethinâs gotta give.â
You furrow your eyebrows, confused.Â
âYou are the one who wonât give, Joel.â
As soon as you say it, he practically drags himself over to you. Completely destitute. You have never seen him look so desperate before. You can tell that heâs been at war with himself ever since you left this morning. His eyes never lied.
His hand creeps up your bare arm, leaving goosebumps in his wake.Â
But then you remember his words from this morning. You start feeling like this is just a moment of weakness for him and that he will regret it later. You had to stop it before it was too late. You did not want to deal with the consequences.Â
âJoel, you said we canât-â
âFuck what I said,â He cuts you off, âDo you want this?â
You stare into those brown eyes, searching for a sign of hesitance. You cannot believe Joel is being this vulnerable with you.Â
But, you do want him. God, you have wanted him so badly for so long. You have searched for him in every man you have ever been with since knowing him.Â
Your mouth opens but nothing comes out. He takes note of your parted lips, every word failing you at that moment.
âDarlinâ-â
âYes,â You finally manage. âYes, I do want this.â
Itâs all he needs. He closes the gap between you two by wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you into his space. His lips crash onto yours, not wasting another breath of air waiting to indulge in his sickest fantasies.Â
You are all Joel ever dreamed about. He knew that once he caved and physically gave in, his world would be shot and everything would revolve around you. For years it had been a teetering object on a cliff, one nudge would have him falling. He always managed. But now, he was falling head first.Â
His lips move so perfectly with your own. Your hand released your towel and found the tufts of his curls at the base of his head. You did not care that the article pooled around your feet, leaving you completely bare in front of Joel. You have wanted this all along. To be uncovered, to be stripped down to the rawest form. He broke the kiss briefly just to scan your naked body, his forehead pressed against your own.Â
âFuck, you are so beautiful.â
Your heart stutters as his hand traces your stomach down to your hips, all the way down to your ass. He stops there, grabbing a handful.Â
âI need you,â You choke out before pressing your lips to his over and over again. âRight now.â
He mumbles âjumpâ into your mouth and you do so, his hands working quickly to hike you up onto his waist. He carries you to your bed, wasting no time dropping you onto your back.Â
He cannot get enough of your soft, swollen lips. Every time he pulls away slightly, he dives in again even more aggressively than the last time.Â
You are so hypnotized by the way he feels on top of you. In the light, he seems so much broader than he was last night. Heâs still fully clothed, to your dismay. You start to tug at his shirt, motioning him to remove the articles that are in your way.Â
He throws off his shirt before he stands up at the edge of the bed and pushes down his jeans.Â
âJoel⊠I-â
He just shuts you up with another passionate kiss. Itâs all tongue and teeth like heâs trying to melt into your mouth. Your hands trail up his back, gripping onto his shoulders, holding him down so he is pressing against your nude body.Â
âGod, I have wanted this for so long,â He sputters, trying not to sound too desperate. âBeen wanting this.â
Thatâs when his hand reaches down between your thighs and gathers the wetness your slit has to offer. His fingers dance across it, starting from the top all the way to your spongy entrance.Â
âPlease, Joel.â
He loves the lust-laced tone you speak with when you say his name. It almost makes him cum there and then.Â
You watch as he makes his way down your body, peppering kisses from your shoulder to your hip. When he parts your legs, you feel quite exposed. The adrenaline of being so spread for him manifests into a moan.Â
âYou are divine, baby.â
The use of that adjective is so-not-Joel that it makes you giggle. He notes your reaction and decides to sink down into you. When his mouth gets close to your core, itâs no longer a laughing matter.Â
He uses his fingers again, using them to spread open your pussy lips. He cannot keep his eyes away from how dripping you are. âThis all for me?â
âY-yes, Joel.â
âGod, I was a fuckinâ fool for so long. Couldâve had her earlier and I never fuckinâ caved. Such an idiot.â
Him giving your cunt pronouns was enough to have you throwing your head back and shuttering. His touch was magnetic like he knew exactly what buttons to push as he rubbed his fingers and palm over your core.Â
âYeah, youâve been missinâ out. Every nightâŠâ You swallow before looking down at the man that is enamored with your pussy, âE-every night I would lay in this bed, fuckinâ myself just thinkinâ about you.â
He growls at the statement, before teasingly kissing your clit. âEvery night, hm, kiddo?â
âGod, yes.â
Your eyes squeeze shut as he leans forward more and dives in. His nose is pressed firmly against the top of your pussy, nudging forward every time his tongue enters your hole. When that motion became consistent, you began to note the rumblings in the pit of your stomach. A familiar build-up that you managed to get when you were playing with yourself.Â
His fingers move in tandem with his lips and tongue. While his middle and pointer finger slide in and out of you, his lips wrap around your clit. Itâs overwhelming and all-consuming.Â
You do not know where to center yourself, so your hands grip the bed sheets you were completely soaking as Joel pulls the first orgasm out of you.Â
âThatâs it, baby, sheâs cryinâ for me, hm?â
You hardly make a noise, the orgasm is so earth-shattering that you just writhe on the mattress.Â
âOh my godâŠâ You groan, finally able to catch your breath. When Joel removes his fingers from you, you watch as he slowly brings them up to his lips.
When he inserts them in his mouth, you gawk at him, unsure how to react. He watches your expression and chuckles darkly.
âMm, never seen a man enjoy the taste of ya?â
You shake your head. âNever expected to hear those words leave your mouth, either.â
âWait âtil you hear what else I got to say.â
He stands up beside the bed, grabs your hips, and brings them to the edge. He is tossing you around with ease, bringing your lower body flush with his. He yanks down his briefs, revealing himself to you. You instantly take notice of how well-endowed he is. You never thought you would ever be close to his cock, let alone have it lining up at your entrance.Â
âJoelâŠâ You stop him with your small voice, but still welcoming him in with your legs opened wide, âI donât know if it will fit.â
He grins, âIt will, baby. Just relax for me, okay?â
You watch him slide his member along your center, the feeling so blissfully overstimulating. You whine a bit, raising your hips to his.Â
But Joel continues his torture, enjoying the way youâre squirming under him. The way your eyebrows are knitted together, your eyes shut as you grind up into him. Itâs the prettiest sight.Â
âReady?â
Your eyes fly open as you watch him ease his way into your core, the sound of squelching filling the room. You donât think you have ever been this wet for someone.Â
âOh my fuckinâ god, JoelâŠâ
He smiles as he inches in, âSqueezinâ my cock so good, darlinâ.â
When heâs fully sheathed inside, he tests the waters by drawing out slowly. You roll your hips in a circle, trying to feel out every inch of him. He fits, but you know once he starts to move faster, the stretch will become overwhelming.Â
Heâs trying to focus and not blow his load immediately. You look so beautiful below him, your tits slowly shifting back and forth every time he draws back and forth. He reaches out, wanting to feel the flesh between his fingers. God, he craved every inch of you, he realizes.Â
You open your legs as far as you can, letting him hit you at a different angle. The movement allows him to slip in a bit more seamlessly, so when he speeds up his thrusts, you donât feel like you will completely split in half.Â
He brings your leg up to hips, and feeling your soft delicate skin against him makes him lose all sense. His hips snap faster the more you moan out for him.Â
âFuckinâ Christ, girl. I canât believe I was missinâ out on this cunt,â He babbles, âNeed this cunt every day from now on. Gonna have you all to myself every night.â
You are too fucked out of your mind to read into those implications.
ââM all yours, Joel.â
He smiles, slowing down a bit. âKeep talkinâ like that and âll finish a lot sooner than you.â
You sit up a bit, your eyes flickering over his entire body. He notices you checking out his nude frame, which makes him feel a bit more bold. He leans down, capturing your lips in a hungry kiss. You love the way his tongue slips into your mouth so effortlessly. When he opens his mouth, his facial hair tickles your nose a bit which makes you smile. When his hips pick back up to a quicker pace, it sends you gasping into his mouth.
âPlease, Joel,â You whine, that familiar build starts up but this time itâs like a freight train. Moving so quickly down every nerve ending in your body. âIâm gonna cum.â
ââM with you, darlinâ. Soak this dick. Iâm right behind ya.â
His dirty talk causes the crash. Your body practically lifts off the mattress. You cry out so loud you are sure a neighbor could hear you. You try to gain your bearings, but you are panting like you just ran a mile.Â
Joel fucks you through it, but the restriction your pussy is putting on his cock sends him over the edge. His hips stutter into yours, his seed emptying into your spent hole. He just keeps repeating your name as his thrusts slow down.
He has never had such a visceral orgasm in his life. His knees are weak and can hardly keep up his weight. He practically falls on top of you, which does not offend you at all. His warm sweaty body on top of you is almost reassuring.Â
âYou okay, kiddo?â He finally mutters as his hot breath fans the nape of your neck. You just nod, bringing your hand up to his salt and pepper hair. You tug lightly, smiling to yourself.Â
âIâm more than okay.â
He finally sits up, his cock spilling out of you as he adjusts his position. Your hole drips a mixture of cum onto your newly clean sheets, but you could care less. Itâs just another thing to hand wash tonight.
Joel stumbles to the middle of the room, picking up your bath towel. He uses it to wipe himself up before coming over to you. Your legs are still slightly apart so he decides to clean you up a bit. Heâs gentle, knowing that you are probably still sensitive.
Once he finishes up, he crawls next to you as you continue to recover. Your bones felt like jello so standing up to adjust yourself was not an option.
So instead of facing him, you stare up at your ceiling fan as his eyes lock onto every detail of your profile. It brings him back to one night you two shared under the stars a couple of years ago. It was his turn to keep watch so you curled up in your sleeping bag by the fire. He admired you from across the flames, the orange hues lit up every angle of your face. It was at that moment that Joel realized that he could not picture his life without you. You had weaseled your way into every facet of his life and he used to resent the impact you had on him. You were younger, more patient but still stubborn like him. You made him laugh, like genuinely laugh, for the first time since the infection. While you may have been a bit impulsive with your emotions, he envied the way you could say exactly what you were thinking.Â
Joel did not want to love you, but it was impossible not to.Â
You finally look over at him, noticing the softness in his gaze.
âAre you okay?â You pose, scrunching your nose.Â
He gives you a toothless smile, his eyes crinkling a bit. âI just canât wait to sleep next to you for the rest of my life.â
tags of people I love and who may wanna read (no pressure I just love u) (some of u did ask tho) : @ashleyfilm @hockeyhughes @pedrospookie @guiltyasdave @amanitacowboy @myownwholewildworld
#joel miller tlou#joel miller#joel miller fanfic#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller fic#joel miller x afab!reader#joel miller x female reader#pedro pascal#tlou au#tlou fic#tlou smut#joel miller fanfiction#fic: for cryinâ out loud#the last of us smut#gracieheartspedro
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LOADS OF FUN : TODOROKI x READER
SUMMARY: After moving into your first apartment together, Shouto seems more amorous than ever. You're not sure whyâbut when he comes home to you doing a load of laundry, more than your clothes are about to get tumbled. TAGS/WARNINGS: nsft (18+ only, minors please dni!), pro hero au, gn + afab reader, established relationship, fluff, emotional sex, table sex, cunnilingus, the shouto domesticity kink agenda goes absolutely crazy in this one lol (2.8k) NOTES: This piece is part of my pretty boy summer Shouto x Reader collab! Please go check out the other incredible fics people have written over the course of the summer; you will absolutely die over how good they are. This fic was also made possible through donations to the Fics for Gaza project. I cannot thank everyone who donated to one of the charities enough, as well as those who organized, reblogged, discussed, and got the word out. Lastly, I am so grateful for your immeasurable patience with me as I take time between fics to manage my workload, I hope I'm not too out of practice here lol. In summary: thank you, thank you, a million times thank you.
The sound of the door opening was hidden in the thump and glug of the washing machine starting its spin cycle.
Halfway across the house, you were obliviousâyou had the clean laundry spread out on the kitchen table, hunting through the pile trying to match one of Shoutoâs socks to another that seemed to have vanished into that mysterious void which opens somewhere between the laundry basket and the dryer. One of his shirts was half-folded over your shoulder, abandoned in favor of the sock search.
The rest of your things were still mostly tangled together on the table, warm and fresh and cottony, the few shirts youâd already folded sagging off the kitchen chairs.
It still gave you a little thrillâeven several weeks after youâd moved in togetherâto see Shoutoâs things twined up with yoursâhis enormous socks dwarfing yours, your sweaters clinging to the occasional piece of his hero suit that hadnât seen enough action to need his agencyâs industrial cleaners.
It all added to your sense of satisfaction with your afternoonâa frosty weekend day youâd spent cozy indoors, moving slowly and leisurely through some chores. A pot of soup simmered on the stove, and your favorite playlist worked itself through in lazy loops. Shouto was due off his rotation soon, and you hummed contentedly to yourself, entertaining pleased little fantasies of curling up with him for the rest of the weekend.
Which of course is when something moved in the corner of your eye. Your hum sawed up into a strangled screech, and you whipped around, flailing. Shoutoâs sock launched itself full force at the intruder before you even registered youâd thrown it. In your shock, your leg caught against the table and you went stumblingâ
âright into a pair of warm hands that caught you about the waist.
Your hands were on the manâs shoulders to push him off before you realized you recognized the touchâand that youâd caught sight of a distinct mop of scarlet and white hair as youâd whipped around.
âShouto! Again?â you scolded reflexively, even as your heartbeat stuttered out of its wild kick into high gear. You tipped your head back to stare your boyfriend in the face, shoulders slumping in relief, letting him take some of your weight.
Shouto peered down at you, that tiny scrunch between his brows that indicated concern. âAre you alright, love?â
Your heartbeat pounded thunderously in your chest. âIâmâfine. But my god we need to get you a bell. I almost peed.â
Shoutoâs mouth shifted minutely into something that might not have registered in anyone elseâs face but was most definitely a regretful downturn on his. He looked even more unfairly beautiful than when heâd left you this morningâa little flushed and windswept from the unseasonable cold, that full mouth pink and pretty.
Your mind flicked momentarily off and back on like a circuit breaker, the way it always did when you had to process Shouto.
Youâd understood he was once-in-a-generation levels of beautiful before youâd even met him, his face staring up at you from the glossy pages of various tabloids over the years. But in person, even after years of knowing him and several more dating him, Shoutoâs appearance still managed to cross all the wires in a personâs brain. His features were an incomprehensible blend of aloof and elegant, sensual and warmâlike a cold masterpiece of a marble sculpture had suddenly found himself with a consciousness and human desires and miles of warm skin.
âI did not mean to startle you,â he said, his voice low and warm. He sounded sincerely regretful.
You knew he hadnât meant toâyouâd long suspected his silent tread was habitually ingrained in him from years of hero work. And, in your most private and ungenerous thoughts, you suspected from years of making himself unobtrusive in his fatherâs home. The thought sat sour in your mouth, like a slice of pickled lemon.
You resisted making an equally sour face, shoving the thought away to make space for the reflexive flush of pleasure seeing Shouto always brought you.
âWelcome home, Sho,â you said instead, smiling up at him. Shoutoâs hands moved on your waist, sliding gently beneath the hem of your tee-shirt to rest on the skin there.
He was still in his hero uniform, and as usual you felt a little goofy in comparison, in nothing but a tee and a well-loved pair of fraying sweatpants, which were this afternoon decorated with little flecks of soup from a brush with the pot.
But Shoutoâs eyes were warm where they rested on you, and that perfect mouth crept back into a contented set. His long fingers smoothed over your skin as he watched you, thumb brushing your hip. He did not look like he found you at all goofy.
In fact, as his eyes dropped down to your ankles, slowly dragging back up to your face, you rather thought he looked a little appreciative. He even took a rather ungentlemanly step back, still holding you, to better take in the whole picture. His eyes wandered over the swell of your hip, the lines of the shirt against your chest, before darting to his own shirt, still folded over your shoulder.
His fingers flexed tellingly on your waist, and those heterochromatic eyes were both a little bit darker as they flicked back to yours.
His obvious regard made you feel warm. You shifted on your feet, shuffling.
âI was justâdoing laundry,â you said for something to say, your mouth feeling kind of dry. Something about him always made you feel sort of shy and light-headed, even after all this time together. âAnd I made soup. I was thinking we could eat on the couch and watch one of those horrendous old All Might films?â
Shoutoâs eyes darted to the stove, then beside you to the pile of your laundry, lingering for a long minute. His long lashes dipped, almost fluttering as his gaze traced over the tangle of your things together. His eyes flicked back to you. He was still for just a moment, watching you assessingly.
And then all of a sudden the world spun in front of your eyes. The hands at your waist lifted you clean off your feet, and you let out a startled âoof!â as you found yourself laid out in the pile of laundry on the table, sheets and sweaters bunching beneath you.
Shouto moved over you, stepping between your spread thighs, right at the edge of the table.
âYou have no idea,â he intoned in a deep, delicious tone that went right down your spine, âwhat it is to come home to you like this.â
You wondered at that, feeling a strange combination of confusion and flattery, when Shoutoâs mouth descended onto yours. His mouth was soft and sweet and insistent and absolutely perfect. The table groaned as he laid some of his weight out over you, pinning you into the laundry as he kissed you.
Your fingers clutched at him immediately, curling in his silky-soft hair, cupping his face to yours. One of Shoutoâs own hands shifted to your thigh, holding you against him as he pressed himself harder into you.
You heard yourself making little gasps of appreciation as Shoutoâs mouth moved down to your neck, laving hot kisses down your throat. You reveled in the feeling of him over you, broad and strong, his shoulders blocking the glow of the overhead light, casting shadows over you.
Heâd been a lot like this lately, ever since youâd moved in together. Heâd been adequately amorous before, of course, and blessed with a pro heroâs strength and unflagging stamina. But a few weeks after youâd moved in together youâd actually decided you needed to reactivate your gym membership given the amount of incredibly athletic sex you were suddenly having over almost every surface in the house.
One of the only spots yet to be touched was the table though, which Shouto seemed determined to rectify at this very moment.
He pulled back from you, his mouth flush from your kisses, looking a little entranced as he stepped out from between your thighs. You made a little noise at the loss of weight and heat over you, but Shouto caught the fabric of your sweatpants, gently but determinedly tugging them off of you. Your underwear was tossed right over one broad shoulder as Shouto went to his knees, and then his mouth was right back on you.
A wave of wild heat licked up your stomach at the noise of appreciation he made before sealing his mouth over you, strong fingers clutching your thighs to keep them apart.
âOh my god!â you said, pleasure zinging right up your spine with the first lave of his tongue over you. âShouto!â
Shouto let out a deep, pleased hum, two long fingers sinking into you embarrassingly easily as he worked your clit with his mouth. Your back arched and you could feel your clothing shift with you, Shoutoâs shirt balling up under your shoulder blade, still half-draped over your shoulder.
âOh, oh!â you heard yourself saying as your fingers twisted in the clothing, shuddering with every lick and suck of Shoutoâs perfect, amazing, talented mouth.
He worked you with the expertise of long, dedicated practiceâeverything about him calculated to drive you insane. One moment he was excruciatingly soft, mouth slack and the touch of his tongue as fleeting and light as the brush of a butterflyâs wing. Then the next he was sucking relentlessly, teasing firmly with the tip of his tongue as his fingers played with you.
Your first climax hit you mortifyingly quickly, and Shouto seemed to know it before you did. His grip tightened on you, holding you down as you bucked against his mouth. Shouto looked more than a little smug as he got to his feet again, unbelting himself and laying back out over you.
He kissed you some more, the taste of yourself always a sort of shock to your system. But Shouto never seemed to mind, and if anything only seemed hungrier for you, mouth pulling at yours like he meant to devour you.
You felt the touch of his hand between your thighs as he lined himself up, then sank into you easily, groaning appreciatively like heâd just sunk into a hot bath. He bit carefully at your neck, one large hand pressing your stomach down to keep you pinned against the edge of the table where he wanted you.
âI always want to come home to you like this,â he intoned into the skin of your neck, his mouth sucking dizzying patterns into your skin. âAlways.â
You could barely think past the slide of him inside you, thick and full and blissfully exquisite. He really was the most perfect man on earth, and he always felt like it too.
You barely managed to blink your eyes open to watch him, trying to catch his meaning in his face. Shouto watched you back, those blue and grey pinned on you like he couldnât bear to look away from you as he moved inside you.
âYouââ you panted out, trying to cling to the thoughts threatening to wiggle out of your grip. âWhat do youâ? Of course youâll always come home to me.â
Shouto bucked into you harder, the slap of his hip against the bottom of your thigh echoing loudly over the burble of soup on the stove. His eyelashes fluttered, mouth softening, and a realization struck you almost dizzy.
Oh, he really liked that.
You suppressed a wave of giddiness, charmed and helplessly pleased that he seemed to like the idea so much. Was that why heâd been so especially ardent this past month? Was it really because youâd moved in together?
Shoutoâs arm hooked under one of your legs, drawing it up firmly over his shoulder so he could press even further inside of you. He looked so good like that that you nearly lost the thread of your thoughts, especially when his next thrust felt like that. Your eyes nearly rolled back in your head.
âAh!â escaped you. âFuck, Shouto. Like that, please!â
Shoutoâs thumb pressed down on your still-sensitive clit and he had to dig the fingers of his other hand into the flesh of your leg to keep you from bucking him right out of you with the way you squirmed. Sweet fucking gods he was unreal.
Shouto fucked you harder, the sound of your skin slapping together obscene in the quiet of the kitchen.
You tried again, struggling to watch his reaction with the way you wanted to throw your head back and babble nonsense instead.
âYouâll always come home to me,â you repeated, gratified when Shoutoâs grip on you tightened, a soft sound escaping him. âYou want me right here for you?â
âAhâyes, love,â Shouto panted, staring down at you again. He looked like he knew what you were doing but didnât care. âYes,â he hissed.
âJust like this?â you prompted, trying not to slur the edges of your speech when he gave another particularly mind-bending thrust of his hips. His chest rose and fell heavily and he looked a little wild-eyed, gazing down at you.
âLike this, for me,â he said. âIn my home, in our homeââ
You could hear the table squeal and groan with the force of his next thrust, and then you had to grip the sides of it to steady yourself as he fucked you, looking blissful. Your nails scrabbled at the edges of the table, caught in between a million sensationsâthe glorious fullness of Shouto inside you, the gentle grind of his thumb against your clit, the way he looked all flushed and beautiful and panting and wantingâ
You squeezed your eyes shut, too overcome with the sight of him to look at him anymore, but it was no use. Your entire body trembled as you came, and Shouto let out a low swear at the way you clenched up around him, hunching over you and pressing himself so impossibly hard against you as he came too.
He slumped down against you, weighing you into the soft-smelling cotton of the laundry you were now definitely going to have to rewash. You could feel his chest rise and fall as he panted, his breath tickling the skin under your ear. He left an unbearably soft, sweet kiss just under the lobe, at odds with the near-wild way heâd just been fucking you.
You warmed, petting through his hair with a helpless affection.
âWell now I know what time I should always do our laundry,â you said.
Shouto huffed into your neck, but you could feel a tiny smile curve his mouth.
âIt is not just that,â he said, but did not elaborate for some minutes until you elbowed him gently. He peeled himself off of you just enough to look down into your face. âIt is the thought of our life together. Our clothes piled together. You in the home we chose and we madeâŠâ he said, trailing off.
But you thought you got the sentiment. It was about how easy it was, how uncomplicated. A safe place to come home to, no expectations, just soup and a pile of sweet-smelling laundry and someone happy to see you. It was something far away from what he'd grown up thinking a home was, possibly something heâd thought heâd never haveâsomething you were determined to make him realize now that he always would.
You let your fingers pull through his hair again, smiling up at him. âI am going to have to do our laundry again, though,â you teased. âIn case that interests you.â
And despite what heâd just said, Shouto did in fact look a little too interested. You watched his mismatched gaze trail over to the closet that opened onto the washer and dryer. A contemplative look snuck across his handsome face, carefully curling the corner of that plush mouth.
âThere is another place we have not yet broken in,â he said slowly, voice dipping low. He looked down at you with an earnest expression completely in contrast to what he was suggesting.
You couldnât help but laugh, and that was all the permission he needed to pull you up, gathering you up in his arms and layering a fat handful of laundry on top of you. His belt buckle rattled loosely beneath you where he'd barely done it up in his haste, and you laughed harder when he turned off the stove as you passed it.
Though it turned out to be a needed precautionâas neither of you found yourselves free to sit down to dinner for several hours yet.
#todoroki x reader#todoroki shouto x reader#shoto x reader#shoto x you#todoroki x you#todoroki x y/n#shouto x reader#shouto todoroki x reader#bnha x reader#mha x reader
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LOVED the sit down fics. Please consider: US telling THEM to sit down. What are they going to do? Argue and sleep on the couch? (Love your works!! Always makes my day when I see a new one)
AHHHHHHHHH! ANON OMG! I love this. I giggled and kicked my feet the entire time I was working on these. I had so much fun jumping back into the Imagines Series after Kinktober with this prompt. While I'm still working through the 3.5k Spooky Bingo event, I am returning to my usual content.
For those curious, THIS is the fic that Anon is referring to.
Presented in four double drabbles.
For the masterlist and how to submit your own request, click HERE
Content & Warnings (per the warnings MDNI): established relationship, suggestive themes, flirting, arguments, swearing
Word Count: 800
ao3 // main masterlist // imagines & what if masterlist
John Price
âJohn. We have to talk about this.â
âWe are talking.â
âNo. Weâre arguing. And youâre not listening.â
âOf course Iâm listening, love.â
âThen what did I just say?â you ask, exasperated.
John opens his mouth and then pauses. He loses steam, the gears turning as he realizes heâs wrong. He takes a deep breath and then holds up his hands. âIf Iâm being honest, loveââ
âFuck. Sit down, John.â
Your tone is sharp, and John drops into a chair, completely silent, his gaze locked in on you.
âIf you are not going to listen to me, then Iâm ending this discussion. We can come back to this later. When weâre calm.â
John is always the steady one. Heâs your rock, but for whatever reason, this one discussion has transformed into an argument.
There is silence after, and you have no idea what John thinks of your sudden authoritative demeanor. His face is blank, and then his mouth turns up into an amused smile.
âWhat?â you ask, suddenly flustered.
John relaxes into the chair, spreading his thighs wide in invitation. âYouâre so fucking beautiful when youâre angry, love.â
âDonât distract me, John,â you mutter, the irritation beginning to melt away.
Kyle "Gaz" Garrick
"We're having this out," says Kyle, grabbing your upper arm. He tugs you against him, head tipping forward in an intimate gesture.
"I don't want to argue with you," you reply.
"And I'm not done." His tone is calm but firm. Whenever Kyle sets his mind to something, it can be difficult for him to change course.
"Well, I am." Kyle's hold on your upper arm tightens a bit. It's not painful, but he draws you closer. "Now, sit down."
"Whaâ"
"Sit. Down."
Kyle draws back, startled. His hold loosens and descends to grasp your wrist as he sinks onto the sofa. You rarely assert yourself, but you're frustrated with him.
âI am done fighting about this. Either we find a compromise, or we end this discussion.â Kyle breathes deep, his gaze intense as you continue. âYou can sleep out here if you wonât budge.â
âI sleep beside you,â replies Kyle.
âThen talk to me. Donât push me around.â
Kyleâs hand on your wrist softens, his thumb gently caressing the inside of your palm. It makes you shiver, and Kyle pulls you closer. "I'm sorry," he murmurs, voice soothing.
"Can we talk now? No fighting?"
"No fighting," he agrees.
Simon "Ghost" Riley
Irritation bubbles under your skin, creating a buzzing sensation that puts you on edge. You and Simon rarely fight but the two of you always circle back to the same issue.
âIâm sick of talking in circles. We have to figure this out.â
The corner of Simonâs mouth twitches. âIâve already told you how I feel about it,â he says.
âI understand but we have to find a compromise.â
âIâm not willing to budge on this.â
âSimonâ"
He pushes in, invading your space. âYouâre the one thatâs undecided.â
You hate being bossed around, and you hate it more when Simon flaunts his dominance during a disagreement.
âSit down,â you growl.
Simon blinks, startled. âWhat?â
âSit. Down.â
Simonâs gaze narrows, the middle of his brow creasing. But he sits, settling on the sofa.
âI understand how you feel but I need you to listen to how Iâm feeling. This is a big decision, and I want us to talk through things. Iâm not just going to bend over and take it.â
âBut you like it when I bend you over.â
âSimon Riley!â
Simon smirks âNeed to let out a little steam?â
âYes,â you mutter, flustered. âBut this conversation isnât over.â
John "Soap" MacTavish
Arguments with Johnny almost always end in sex.
Heâll use his tongue, his fingers, and then eventually his dick until youâre blissfully fucked out of your head.
âYou are not distracting me,â you say sharply as Johnny moves in, a sly smile on his face.
His hands settle on your waist, gripping tightly. You know if you donât get a handle on this now, youâll be face down in the bed with ass in the air in moments. Itâs Johnnyâs favorite position.
Placing your hands on Johnnyâs chest, you give him a bit of a shove, creating space. âSit down, Johnny.â
Johnnyâs eyebrows rise suggestively. With a sauntering sway, Johnny sits on the edge of the bed. Heâs shirtless and wearing grey sweatpants. They hang dangerously low on his hips.
You cover your eyes. âWe need to have a conversation that doesnât end in sex.â
âI donât see the issue.â
âOf course you donât,â you mutter.
âI like it when you boss me around.â You can feel his heat just before his arms slide around you.
âOh my God,â you groan, pushing at his chest. âSit down.â
Johnny teasingly nips at your neck. âOnly if you sit in my lap.â
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First time having sex is awkward!
pairing :: Virgin!Megumi x Virgin!Reader
warning :: college/university AU, awkward sex, safe sex (finally), lingerie stuff, fingering, slight overstim, very soft, would you hate me if I said this wasnât rly proof read, need this out of my drafts asap
note :: very inspired by @sonotpattismith fic Hold Me And Explore Me, hereâs the link!
For the years youâve been friends with Megumi youâve never ever known him to discuss a single intimate topic. For the five months youâve been in a relationship with him, that fact never changed.
Megumi was a prude, basically.
It wasnât as though you were one to spill secrets about your personal moments either. Occasionally youâd let the odd story slip when drunk (mainly letting loose some poor experiences being felt up during your younger years of dating), but other than that, you kept your mouth shut.
So when Maki asked you a completely out of pocket question, both you and your boyfriend turned to ice.
âHave the two of you even fucked yet?â
No. Of course you havenât. You hadnât even come close! Despite the air being thickened by everyoneâs collective drunkenness, you felt a small part of you would resent Maki for the rest of your life after putting you in this situation.
Your jaw slacked open and you took in a breath. The truth lilting on the tip of your tongue.
âDonât ask personal questions like that.â Megumi cut, to everyoneâs collective disappointment, they groaned. Somewhat tipsy himself, Megumi still had the clarity to get the others off your scent and thankfully his harsh words had sent them on another chatting spree devoid of your sex life.
Maki, keen gaze still locked on both you and Megumi, muttered a swift. âGuess you havenât put that set to use, huh.â Before taking a sip of her vodka mix.
You flushed immediately, embarrassment mixing with the warm alcohol in your bloodstream, coating your cheeks a deep plum colour. Mortification filling your wide eyes, you glanced at Megumi who held an unbothered expression, one of boredom and calm.
But for a split second, his dark blues swiped over you and you caught the slightest hint of curiosity in his narrow gaze. What set?
You snapped your head forward, neck aching from the whiplash.
The âsetâ Maki was referring to, was bought during a shopping trip Nobara invited both of you to. She needed a refill on her skincare items, Maki needed a new set of sports bras and you needed an excuse to leave your dorm room.
Makiâs chosen store was the closest, so the three of you headed there first. Inside, your eyes caught on the walls covered with expensive underwear made of lace and silk hanging on thin mannequins.
âI should get a new bra, too, my favourites are getting worn out.â Nobara mumbled, looking at the odd racks assembled by colour and size.
A particularly captivating bodysuit grabbed your attention; a smooth ivory piece decorated with straps and shining gemstones, having tuffs of silk peak out of the sides like a skirt and wings. The shiny fabric called to rest comfortably against your skin. It was the most expensive, being shown off at the front of the store to lure young women who wanted to wrap their pretty bodies and show off to their boyfriends. Just like you.
âThat oneâs too cutesy.â Nobara uttered, following your tranced gaze. âLingerie is a scam anyway, truth is men donât even care. They just take it off.â
That was right, Nobara had had sex. Unlike you.
âWould you⊠help me pick something nice out?â You asked, a gentle and shy invitation.
Despite her previous slander of lingerie, her cheeks glowed in excitement. âSure. For you and Fushiguro, right?â
âI guess so.â You kindly but nervously replied. Nobara lead you deeper into the store, coming to a back wall with more designs, all notably darker with plenty more lace.
She gazed over the options. âWhat do you usually like to wear?â She asked.
âI donât knowâ nothing?â You responded, awkward hand lifting to fiddle with a purple bralet.
Nobara side eyed you, giving a suspicious look before she askedâ much too casually. âFirst time?â
âYes.â You nodded, the fabric of the bralet suddenly becoming very interesting!
âFirst time with Fushiguro, or?â Her trail lilted delicately, hopefully displaying herself as a safe person to spill your secrets to.
âFirst, first time.â You uttered quietly.
In a quick swish, Nobara grabbed your shoulders and pulled you to her. âSeriously?â She asked.
âYes, seriously. Is it hard to believe?â You frowned, too mortified for her questioning.
She nodded. âYes! Youâre a total catch.â
âWell, itâs not like Iâve never done anything.â You added, hands defensively rising to your chest. âIâve been in relationships before, Iâveââ you lowered your voice. âIâve fooled around.â
âOh I bet you have.â She added, grin replacing her surprised gape.
âStop it, youâre so embarrassing.â You pushed against her shoulder, freeing yourself from her death grip.
âOkay, first set, first set.â Mind now back to the mission, she returned to the racks of bras and thongs. âYou should have something simple, but sexy. Black, too.â
âWhy black?â Plenty of other colours filled the store.
âFushiguro likes dark things, so heâll like black on you.â The sensible explanation left her with a shrug.
Would that really be the case? Would Megumi look at your body being cupped by expensive black fabric and yearn for you? You could hardly imagine it. Megumi was never eager for anything, he was the type of guy to react to things with tame calmness. Would he blush? Reach to touch you? Kiss you?
Nobara handed you a neat, black matching bra and thong. âGo try this on.â She instructed, offering you an encouraging smile.
Face to face with your lewdly dressed body and flushed expression in the dressing room only made your anxiousness grow. Nobara had picked a beautiful set, a nicely patterned lace bra broken up by thick black straps pushed up your boobs, coined by a gemstone hanging off the middle. Small ripples of black sheer peaked from the supportive boning, similarly decorating the thin black straps curving around your hips holding up the lacy thong which too, had a gemstone hanging off the centre.
Fuck, Nobara had good taste.
But despite the fact you bought the matching underwear a month ago, nothing came of it. Youâd worn it every single time you saw Megumi; a casual date at the park, an afternoon out at the movies, a night in lounging around. Just in case, you had thought, just in case something happens.
And because you wore them everytime you saw Megumi, they clung to your body now, at the very party Maki judged you for not having shown them off yet.
You sipped at your bitter alcohol mix, avoiding both the stares of your boyfriend and your friend. Nobaraâs chanting became a welcome distraction, telling Yuji to âdrink drink drink!â Down his can of rum. Everyone cheered at his final gulp, including you.
Megumi, however, remained silent.
When the night came to a tired end (at about two in the morning), Megumi and yourself walked to your dorm in a sobering stumbled.
Arms around his neck, you brought Megumi into the plush bed with you, planting messy kisses along his hairline and laughing about the mischief of the night. âItadori is going to be so hungover.â You muttered.
âHm.â He thoughtlessly replied, craning his head so your lips made contact with his instead. He leaned over you, slowly letting his body sink into yours and sandwiching you between the bed and him.
In these moments of privacy you felt closest to Megumi. Heâd unabashedly pull you in, kiss you and hold you tight.
You hummed against his lips, bringing your hands up to rake your nails through his hair, a trick you knew would immediately cause him to go soft against you, and he did, waist falling between your legs and hands twitching against your sides. He groaned softly and you wished you could record the sound and add it to a private playlist.
Chasing the mild heat in your abdomen, you furthered the kisses shared, moving into making out instead of peppery pecks. He followed you, daring to nip at your bottom lip (a habit heâd picked up from the one time you did it to him).
Your legs wrapped around his hips, pulling his warmth in closer. That shift was what made both your clothed sexes connect. Jolted by the feeling, Megumi slipped from your lips to your ear, whispering a breathy command.
âShow me your set.â
He wasnât even quite sure what he was asking, but he had an idea, a lewd idea. He knew he needed to know what Maki was talking about, what she knew about his girlfriend that he didnât.
You gulped, an audible squeak catching in your throat. âYou really want to see?â You asked.
He nodded silently, watching your every move as you hesitantly lifted your shirt up and over your head. His narrow eyes grew wide at the sight of your tits cupped by the stunning black garment. You hid in the pillow behind you, digging half your face into the plush at his bewildered expression.
Megumiâs hand had already began moving without him thinking. In what seemed like slow motion, his large palm came to fit around your boob. His thumb rubbed over the soft lace and because of its thin fabric, you gasped as it tickled your sensitive middle.
The noise sobered Megumi from his drunk, tranced state and he pulled his hand away like it had acted on its own free will. He sat up, eyes concentrated on your flushed, messy figure. Fuck, he was so in love with you it hurt.
âI should go.â He uttered softly, pressing a curt kiss to your head.
âWhat? Butââ You babbled something, voice cracking.
âThis isnât a good time, itâs late, youâre drunk.â He reassured your rejection with another kiss.
âYou wonât stay?â You asked, leaving you as more of a plea.
âNot tonight.â He finished. âIâll see you tomorrow.â
You were then left empty and cold, and despite wrapping yourself in layers of blankets, you felt as naked as ever. The question what was wrong with you? Pulling you into a drunkenly tear filled sleep.
The next morning, the barking of your third alarm pulled you from your slumber. You smacked at the screen of your phone, lifting your now throbbing head from the sweet embrace of your pillow.
Almost immediately Megumiâs rejection of you last night reminded you why your eyes were so crusty with dried tears. However, you didnât have much time to linger on it, already being late for your morning lecture.
Lunch was when you saw Megumi next. You were reading over your papers in the yard with a furrowed brow, your phone to your ear.
âWhat do you mean, you donât know?â You asked.
âI mean I donât know! Youâve know Fushiguro pretty much the same amount of time I have, why donât you know if heâs had sex?â Nobara snapped back, voice slightly fuzzy through your phone. âOh, letâs not forget the fact youâre also his girlfriend!â
âI know, I justâ ugh. Why is this so complicated?â You huffed.
âIt really isnât, girl. Youâre just making it complicated.â She added back, unfiltered judgment in her tone.
âI know, I know.â You were weak before her unwavering moral superiority.
âTalk to him. Neither of you did anything wrong, he was probably still drunk and didnât want to show you he had whisky dick or maybe he is a virgin and was just too nervous to fuck you.â You wondered for a brief moment who Nobara was around that could hear her talk about your (lack of) sex life.
âI doubt it.â You murmured. Finally your eyes caught the tall shadow that was Megumi and you fiddle to catch your phone as it dropped from your hand. âI gotta go, heâs here. Bye!â
One hand deep in his pocket and the other carrying a bag bloated with book, Megumi walked to you, standing tall over your sitting self.
âNobara?â He asked, head jutting towards your phone.
âYup, she uhâ just wonât stop calling me.â You breathily laughed, stupidly covering the fact you had been the one calling her nonstop.
His careful eyes surveyed you, immediately grabbing something was amiss. âHungover?â
Lord knew you werenât going to bring up last night if he didnât. Youâd rather let it die in the past. âI was this morning, but Iâm alright now.â You offered a kind, but forced smile. âYou okay?â You returned, gazing up at him.
With the baggy top youâd hurriedly put on this morning, Megumi could see past the collar, eyes catching the familiar black bra. You were so rushed this morning, you didnât have time to change it. His heart squeezed painfully, hand twitching as it recalled the feeling of the fabric. The same hand that fucked his dick until he came thinking of you once he was alone. Fuck, he was pathetic. âIâm fine.â He gritted. Even through the drunk haze of the prior night, that memory of you below him was as clear as day in his mind.
âYouâve got baseball this afternoon, right? Do you want to come over afterwards?â You asked.
âI can, why?â So you could show him more of your gorgeous body?
âJust to hangout, nâ chat.â You added, as casually as possible. Technically you werenât lying.
âIâll come.â He assured. His hands lifted to touch you, but Megumi decided better, shoving it back into his pocket. âWill I see you at practice?â
âIâll be there.â You smiled.
Youâd watched Megumi play baseball since he was young, having been one of his biggest supporters (besides Gojo, of course) since you two became friends. Youâd love to watch him play, sitting on a nearby bench with a book to read or your computer to finish an assignment.
Megumi had never admitted it out loud, but before each swing of his bat, heâd gaze out into the empty audience chairs to catch a glimpse of you. You were always there, always looking at him.
It never failed to make his heart swell, even after the two of you began dating, seeing you sit there just for him was the kind of loyalty that made Megumi obsessed with you.
Today, though, it seemed Megumi had more on his mind than he usually did. It was so obvious in the way he played. He was distracted.
On the walk back to your dorm, you could tell he was clearly unimpressed by himself.
Once inside, you excused yourself to the bathroom just to freshen up.
Reflecting from your mirror like a ghost haunting you, hung your cleanly washed thong. Now dry and ready to be worn. Maybe, just maybe, finally ready to be seen. The old habit still clawed you, just in case, you thought, just in case something happens.
You slipped out of the bathroom, a sudden nervousness taking you. âHey, can we talk?â You asked, finding a seat next to Megumi on your bed.
His furrowed expression disappeared the moment he heard your tone and his eyes lifted to you expectantly. You inhaled.
âIâve got to tell you something.â You stated, voice wavering despite your desire to sound sure.
âYeah?â
âIâm a virgin.â You finally uttered.
âOh, okay.â You could hear in his voice, the slightest hint of bewilderment. Mostly at the suddenness.
âIâve never had a dick in me, okay? So Iâm nervous.â You let the words out like Megumi had you tied up, forcing a confession out of you. A tight pause filled the air as you let the weight of your secret fill the room.
âWhy are you so embarrassed? Itâs not like Iâve had sex, either.â Megumiâs narrow eyes squinted at his furrowed brow. His cheeks tinted pink, clearly out of his comfort zone to admit this.
âYou havenât?â You felt free of an imaginary weight that lifted from your chest.
âYes? Youâve been my only girlfriend, I assumed you wouldâve just guessed.â
âSo nothing? No hookups or anything?â
âNot my thing.â
Your chest bubbled with a freeing excitement. Youâd have to thank Nobara later and let her know sheâs the goddess of advice. âThank God, I was so worried.â You exhaled.
âWorried?â His hand came to grasp your arm. Had he seriously done something to make you worry?
âWhen you left last night, I thought I did something wrong orââ
Fuck. Of course. âNo, you didnât.â He squeezed your arm. He was just an idiot, a drunk, horny idiot. âIt was the alcohol, I didnât think it was a good idea. You didnât do anything. You were perfect.â His eyes avoided you, cheeks growing darker.
Was he embarrassed? You kissed his jaw, eagerly planting a peck free of doubt.
The kiss seemed to break him from his mumbling as he adjusted your aim, pulling your chin up and kissing your lips. He kissed you again, and you could feel it in his affection too, an excitement to explore you, be the first to learn your body.
To reach his lips better, you moved to straddle Megumi, planting yourself on his lap and letting yourself be enveloped by his affection.
He pulled you down with him as his back fell into the mattress and as you rocked on his lap, you felt the line of his dick through his pants.
Then reality hit you. You two were going to do it. You sat up, blinking at the boy beneath you.
ââŠHey.â You peeped, a stupid joking tone wrapping your words.
âHey.â Megumi replied, his own words threaded with dull awkwardness.
âDo you.. come here often?â You continued, hands fiddling with the collar of his shirt.
He exhaled sharply, amused. âI do.â
âSame.â You nodded slowly. Another flustered moment of silence passed over you.
Megumiâs mind seemed clouded and unbothered by the pause, eyes becoming focused on your shirt. You could guess what he was thinking about.
âIâm wearing it again.â You muttered. His eyes flickered to you, holding an intense gaze youâd only seen him have in serious situations of concentration. âDo you want to see?â
His jaw clenched, and he nodded once. âYes.â
You offered your shirt to him, prompting him to be the one to take it off you. His thick hands took the fabric, slowly pulling it up and over your head. His eyes caught on the black set again. Now, his gaze weakened, still tense but clouded by a soft desire.
Finally letting in to what he really wanted to do to you the previous night, Megumi sat up, cradling your abdomen to keep you stilled on top of him as he pressed a kiss to the skin that spilled out of your bra. He lightly sucked, no doubt hoping to leave a red mark.
âMegumi.â You softly murmured. The sound pricked his ears like a melody. He continued, more driven kissing and sucking up until he reached your collar bone and cheek.
Face just below your own, Megumi gazed up at you with his usually bored eyes, but currently they were anything but, holding a softness for you that could only be explained away by love. Riddle in the blue of his irises held the deep specks of lust. You wanted more, wanted to see his eyes flutter from pleasure.
Megumiâs thoughts similarly danced along the same trail as your own but despite his somewhat tame expression they were nasty compared to your own. Mostly, they lingered south. His fingers hooked the sides of your pants.
âI want to see the bottom pair.â He murmured, fierce eyes pinning you to his command.
âO-Okay.â You shyly huffed, moving back so Megumi could undress you with more ease. His eyes lingered on your own as he slid off your bottoms, like a boy closing his eyes as he opened his birthday gift so he could be more surprised by the reveal of it fully unwrapped in front of him. As much as you wanted to shy from his gaze, you couldnât.
Finally your pants were off, tossed off the bed with your shirt. You watched his gaze flicker to your thong, and you shivered at the exposure. He leaned in, hands resting on your knees in an attempt to let you know he wanted them open, you didnât comply, far too embarrassed. âPretty.â He muttered. The swarm of butterflies in your stomach fluttered uncontrollably.
One of his hands snaked down your thigh, coming to grasp the gemstone hanging from the front strap. He twisted it between his thumb and index finger, and you badly wished it heâd play with your clit like that.
Then, his hand dragged over the lace fabric, so dangerously close to your bundle of nerves that your legs creaked opened on pure instinct. Megumi huffed at your bodies desire to be touched, taking the moment of weakness to slip himself between your legs.
Lower now, his fingers dared to slide over your clit. You gasped and his hand stunted.
âFeel okay?â He breathed, lust kissed eyes glowering at you. Donât make him stop, not yet. Not when he was finally able to feel you.
âFeels good.â You murmured. Megumiâs jaw slacked and he panted a suppressed grunt at your pathetic words. Almost immediately he continued the motion, familiarising himself with what spots of your cunt would made you hiccup and your tummy twitch. âM-Megumi.â You whined with no real purpose behind your plea.
Hot, it was becoming too hot. He left your pussy for a second, pulling off his shirt and tossing it like he had your pants. Your cheeks blazed at his thin but muscled body. Youâd only ever caught sight of his abs on a windy day, never had you seen his bare chest before. His skin was so smooth and light, your fingers begged to memories each curve and bump.
He closed the space between you, coming to press messy pecks on your lips whilst his hand returned to your cunt. Your hands rested against his thudding chest, letting yourself fall into the bedding.
âI can feel your heart beat.â You huffed, somewhat excited by the rapid pace. âNervous?â You asked, a teasing prod.
âEager.â He corrected, collecting your lips in another kiss.
His ring and index calmly slid up and down, the tips of his fingers daring over the patch of wet forming around your sex. You wanted to do the same, wanted so desperately to feel more of his body, but your nails stilled, dug into his chest waiting for some kind of permission you couldnât even ask for.
And Megumi, the utter mind reader, took your wrist with his free hand and led you on a trail down his abdomen. He mustâve felt your hesitancy and made the move for you, that, or he was desperate to feel your hands wander over his body.
And your featherlight fingers curved over the dips of his abs. In reaction to your sweet touch, you felt his rubbing become messy and he pressed hard against your clit. You gasped into his mouth, nails scraping against his tight stomach and his jaw clenched tight, swallowing a grunt.
âMore, Megs, please.â You blurted, hole dripping and utterly prepped for whatever Megumi wanted to stuff inside you.
He remained somewhat levelheaded, thinking that if he fucked you now, heâd cum too quick and this would be all over. He couldnât bear the thought of leaving you unsatisfied. So despite his aching cock, his fingers dipped under your thong and circled your weeping cunt. He was going to savour every single second.
Slowly, he pushed past the rings of your wet chasm. And fuck. His fingers and dick mustâve been connected, because he couldâve sworn he felt the ghost of your inside around him just like they were around his fingers.
His cock twitched, leaking a fat blob of precum. âShit.â The way your pussy jumped at his curse didnât go unnoticed by him.
âOh Godâ Megumi, hng.â Your legs weakened, turning to jelly at the feeling of his warm fingers pressing against your tight, sensitive walls. Megumiâs two digits were thicker and rugged from gripping a bat all his life, the perfect size and texture against your trembling insides and otherworldly compared to your own.
âGood?â He asked.
âYeaâ mhm.â Your eyes fluttered shut, hands hesitating over Megumiâs torso until they gripped his tensed arms.
His mouth hung open, too distracted by massaging your insides to dedicate his lips to you. Hot pants filled your mouth as you desperately kissed him, each breath of his slowly filling with grunts to the symphony of your whines. Each moan from you battered his dick, making it pulse painfully for you.
His fingers chased your twitching hips, pushing in deeper each time you squirmed from the sensation. Until the tips of his fingers slid against the spongey sweet spot inside of you that was hidden in the curve of your chasm.
âRight there!â You squealed, the hight of your voice surprising both of you. âCurl your fingersâ Mh! just like that.â
He did so, pushing his digits against the sweet spot, lightly pressing and smoothing over the area. You trembled beneath him, clinging to his body like he was your life support.
Megumi loved every second of it, watching your body contort from just his fingers. He just wanted to watch you like this, utterly drunk on pleasure, for forever.
He wanted to make cum so badly it was driving him mad.
âOhh, please donât stop.â How could he? Your pussy had just begun clenching around him so gorgeously, tightening like the building orgasm inside you.
Megumi had only realised youâd cum after you yelped his name and your walls sucked on his fingers, trying to milk them of cum. He wanted so badly to feel the sensation around his cock.
âHngâ thank you, thank you.â You babbled embarrassingly, kissing along Megumiâs throat.
He couldnât stand it anymore, the lack of you around his dick, uncomfortably he palmed his boxers, trying to adjusted his blood filled cock.
The trance of afterglow seemed to subside as you gazed over Megumiâs frustration. Although you were undone, you still craved more of him inside your fuzzy chasm. âMore?â You asked, an invitation.
Megumi nodded, thanking the heavens you werenât done with him. His hand dug into the wallet in his pant pocket, digging out a condom. He pulled it out, half pruned fingers covered in your slick attempting to tear it open.
It was like youâd been slapped in the face with the curt realisation that he had prepared for this. Just as you went to buy lingerie, Megumi had gone and bought condoms. He mustâve thought it couldâve happened at any moment to keep one in his wallet.
He brought the wrapper to his teeth, being frustrated with his inability to open it and tore it open with his clenched teeth. You sucked in a breath at his flimsy eagerness.
The bashfulness that came with revealing himself seemed to skip Megumiâs mind, as he pulled down his baggy pants to let his leaking cock free of the fabric.
Your eyes shot up to the ceiling, needing to look elsewhere as you heard him slide on the plastic birth control. From the glimpse you did catch you could tell he was thin and long. Your attention dived back down once you left a gentle hand rest on your hip, his thumb rubbing over the bone.
His eyes, once you met them, held a simple question; are you ready?
You nodded, closing your eyelids and bracing for his length. However the feeling never came, only his lips as they trailed from your tummy, over your bra and up to your lips.
Your hands cradled his head, nails dragging across his scalp and he grunted. This felt familiar, the feeling of his body softening against yours as you pressed simple kisses onto one anotherâs lips. Through the intimacy, you felt Megumi readjust, pulling your underwear to the side and lining his tip against your sopping sex.
Closer now, you hugged him through the stress. He slowly sunk into you, the plastic of the condom feeling cool against your hot insides. âFuck.â He hissed, nipping at your bottom lip.
You sobbed, letting the sensation of being filled by your boyfriend feed your mouth with curses.
He entered slowly, just as much for you as it was for him. His face, flushed red and eyes fluttering in pleasure. You not far from the same, mouth agape with lewd noises spewing out.
He bottomed out when your hips met, taking a brief minute to calm your collective gasps. You gazed down, drowsily taking in the enrapturing sight of you two being connected. Megumi moaned weakly at your smitten stare, feeling himself fall apart from inside you.
âSâokay?â He asked.
âY-Yes, you can move.â You permitted desperately.
He drawled his hips out carefully, rolling inwards again. Your insides still buzzed from his fingers, raw and sensitive to his filling cock. He could feel you spasm around him, forcing friction when he desperately needed you to be still so he didnât cum prematurely.
Another breathless curse left him as his length dived back into you. âOh fuckâ I love you.â You gaped at the words, wondering suddenly was that the first time heâs ever said that?
He rolled his hips again, breaking up your quick declaration. âLoveâ mhâ you.â
He cradled you, pulling your body in with his unlikely strength as he fucked you gently. Youâd never felt so close to another person before, having him so deep within you, filling your body with pleasure.
Megumi had lost most of his composure, becoming a vocal mess as he humped into your heavenly insides.
âSo tight.â He uttered into your skin. âSâperfect.â He kissed your skin, sucking hard hickies into your chest and neck.
âMnhâ love you, hng.â You repeated, too cock drunk to babble anything else.
Messier now, his hip rolls became somewhat frantic, chasing the building mountain of his orgasm. âS-Shitâ Iâm gonna cum.â The statement rolled off his tongue in a pathetic whine, another crack from his usual composure.
âDonât s-stop! Please, Gumi ahh.â You were already being worked to your second orgasm, you couldnât bare to be emptied of him before you reached your high. Your legs wrapped around him, keeping Megumi in.
âNghâ fffuck.â He plowed harder now, his cock tip perfectly fucking against your sweet spot. Suddenly his tame thrusts became a stuttering mess as he muffled your name into your shoulder.
You could feel him orgasm, feel his cock jerk, feel his cum bloat the tip of the condom inside you.
Noticing him slow, you rolled your hips, desperately fucking yourself onto his mid-orgasm dick.
His hands smack at your sides, attempting you to pull you off his overstimulated dick.
âAlmost almost almostââ You pleaded.
With what he had left in him, Megumi took your hips and helped you grind yourself on his cock. He bit your shoulder, muffling the pained moans leaving him.
âFuck!â You squeaked, his dick slid over your g-spot again, finally bringing you to your spine tingling orgasm. Your insides spasmed around Megumiâs dick, and he whined at the feeling, growing painfully hard again.
Your body went limp, as did the tight hold you had on Megumi. Both your bodies sat panting, utterly fucked out and glistening with sweat.
Raising from you, Megumi looked over your flushed, messy state, his cock still warm fitted inside you. He savoured the sight, thinking that if he could take a photo of this, heâd keep it in his wallet.
âWe should shower.â He murmured, painting kisses along your shoulder.
âMhm, okay.â You nodded.
Fuzzy insides retracting as Megumi slipped from you, you sighed longingly, whilst he grunted, disappointed he couldnât live inside you.
You groggily sat up, kissing him before attempting to move off the bed but Megumi kept you back, hooking a finger around the strap of your bra.
âHow much was the set?â He asked.
âUhm, not much, Nobara helped me pay for it soââ
âIâll buy you another one.â
The heat that had just left your cheeks suddenly returned.
#jjk#jjk x reader#megumi fushiguro x reader#megumi x reader#megumi x you#megumi smut#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro x reader#fushiguro megumi#Fushiguro Megumi x reader#megumi x y/n#megumi fushiguro x you#Jjk smut
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casual - ln4
summary: youâre in a situationship with lando norris, one that you know is going to break your heart, but you canât seem to walk away. wc: 11.7k
folkie radio: i was about to scrap this entire fic bc i just didnât like they way it was turning out but i finished it đ iâm still not really confident about it but i hope you enjoy it. disclaimer: this is angsty !!
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
You and Lando. Lando and You. An undefined space, more than friends, less than a relationship. You remember it like it was yesterday, though almost a year has passed.
It started innocently enough. As a data analyst and strategist for McLaren, you often found yourself working late nights, poring over race statistics and performance metrics. Lando would sometimes wander into the office, restless after a day of simulations and meetings.
At first, your interactions were purely professional - discussing tire degradation rates or fuel consumption patterns. But gradually, conversations began to drift, getting more personal and personal.
The shift happened subtly. One night, after a particularly grueling race weekend, you were both exhausted, sprawled on the office couch analyzing data. Lando's head drooped onto your shoulder, and for a moment, neither of you moved. The air crackled with tension.
"We shouldn't," you murmured, even as you turned to face him.
"Probably not," Lando agreed, his blue eyes flickering to your lips.
The kiss was inevitable, months of built-up attraction finally finding release. And then came another, and another.
When Lando suggested heading back to his place, you found yourself saying yes without hesitation.
Before you knew it, you were in his apartment, you could feel the tension in the air. Lando stepped closer, his hand cupping your cheek.
"I've been wanting to do this for a while," he murmured, before leaning in to kiss you again.
Clothes were shed as you made your way to his bedroom, falling onto his bed in a tangle of limbs.
The next morning, sunlight streams through unfamiliar curtains, and you blink awake, momentarily disoriented. Lando's sleeping form beside you brings the memories of last night flooding back.
Lando stirs, his blue eyes meeting yours. "Morning," he mumbles, a shy smile playing on his lips. "So... that happened."
You nod, unsure of what to say. "It did."
An awkward silence stretches between you, the weight of the previous night settling in. You would be lying if you said that you didn't enjoy it. You did. You enjoyed it a lot. But you knew the implications of getting close with someone like Lando Norris.
"Look, Iast night was great," finally, Lando speaks. "But my life, my career... it's complicated."
"I understand," you reply, trying to hide the embarrassment on your face, "I mean, we're work colleges after all, it's complicated for me too."
"I'm not saying I regret this," he quickly adds, "I just... I can't offer you something else right now."
You take a deep breath, weighing your options. "So what are you offering?"
"Honestly? I don't know," Lando runs a hand through his tousled hair, "But I'd like to keep seeing you, if you're okay with... not defining things?"
And so begins, your undefined journey with Lando Norris. From that moment, your relationship existed in a grey area. At work, you maintained professionalism, but stolen glances, brushed hands and the way your clothes always ended up in his bedroom floor told a different story.
You know it's not ideal, to have a situationship with Lando Norris. Not when you know you could really fall for him and jeopardize your job. But at the same time, you can't walk away.
You love you job so much, and the fact that you're willing to shut the rest of the world away in order to focus on what you needed to do proved it.
As the Japanese Grand Prix weekend unfolded, you found yourself buried in work. The Suzuka circuit always presented challenges, and you were determined to give the team every advantage possible.
You were so engrossed in your data analysis that you barely noticed Lando enter the temporary office setup. His hand on your shoulder made you jump.
"Christ, Lando! You scared me," you exclaimed, pulling off your headphones.
He grinned, but there was a hint of something else in his eyes. "Come with me," he said, taking your hand and gently pulling you up.
"Lando, I'm in the middle of-"
"It can wait," he insisted, leading you out of the office and towards his driver's room.
Once inside, he closed the door and leaned against it, watching you with an intensity that made your heart race.
"I miss you," he said simply.
You felt a pang of guilt. It had been weeks since you'd had any real time alone together. "I've been busy," you replied, trying to keep your tone light.
"Busy doing what?" Lando raised an eyebrow.
"Coming up with strategies so you can win races, actually," you retorted, a hint of challenge in your voice.
"Oh really? And how's that going?" he stepped closer, a teasing glint in his eye.
"Well, if you'd stop distracting me," you tilted your chin up defiantly, "Maybe I could finish and you'd find out."
Lando chuckled, closing the distance between you. His hands found your waist, pulling you against him. "Maybe I like distracting you," he murmured, his breath warm against your ear.
You shivered involuntarily. "Lando..." you warned, but there was no real resistance in your voice.
"Tell me about these strategies," he said, his lips now trailing along your jawline. "How are you planning to make me faster?"
You struggled to maintain your train of thought as his touch sent sparks through your body. "Well," you managed, "I've been analyzing your cornering speeds and-"
Lando cut you off with a kiss, deep and passionate. When he pulled away, you were both breathless.
"Sorry," he grinned, not looking sorry at all. "You were saying?"
"You're impossible, you know that?"
Before he can even reply, you drag him for another kiss. His fingers tangled in your hair as he pulls you closer, your hands slid under his team shirt, tracing the lean muscles of his back.
When you broke apart, Lando's eyes were dark with desire.
"I thought I was the one who distracted you. Seems like you're just as needy as I am," he smirked, his voice low and teasing.
"Don't flatter yourself, Norris," you felt a blush creep up your cheeks, but matched his playful tone, "I'm just... thorough in my research."
Lando's laugh was warm against your neck as he pressed a kiss there. "Is that what we're calling it now?"
"We're not calling it a relationship, aren't we?" you blurted out before you could even think about it.
Lando's expression softened for a moment, a flicker of something unreadable passing through his eyes. But quickly, his trademark grin returned.
"Well, we're not calling it a relationship," he said, his tone light and teasing, "maybe we should call it a 'performance enhancement program'. You know, for the sake of the team."
You couldn't help but laugh, even as you felt a twinge in your chest at the casual deflection of the relationship topic. "Oh, is that what this is? And here I thought I was just your favorite data analyst."
"Oh, you definitely are," Lando murmured, leaning in for another kiss. "The very best at... analyzing my data."
You rolled your eyes at the innuendo but smiled despite yourself. "As tempting as it is to continue this 'program'," you said, gently pushing him back, "I really do need to get back to work. Those race strategies won't write themselves, you know."
"Fine, fine. Go make me faster on paper. But don't forget, I might need some hands-on analysis later."
"We'll see about that, hotshot," you replied, straightening your clothes and heading for the door. "Focus on your qualifying first."
It's late, well past midnight, when your phone buzzes with a text. You're still up, reviewing data from the day's practice sessions. The message is from Lando, of course.
"Room 507. Now. Please?"
You can't help but smile, imagining the impatience and desire behind those words. You type back:
"Demanding, aren't we? What if I'm busy?"
His reply comes quickly: "Busy with what? I know you're probably still working. Take a break. You deserve it.â
You laugh softly. "I deserve it, huh? Well, when you put it that way..."
"So you're coming?"
You pause, pretending to consider it, even though you both know you're already reaching for your room key. "I suppose I could spare a few minutes."
"There's my girl"
You slip out of your room, heart racing with anticipation. You've done this countless of times before, sneaking out of your hotel room to end up naked in Lando's, but you still felt like a teenage girl every single time.
The hotel corridor is quiet, your footsteps muffled by the plush carpet. You're so focused on reaching Lando's room that you almost collide with someone rounding the corner.
"Whoa, sorry!" You step back, then freeze as you realize it's Oscar, who looks equally surprised.
"Oh, hey. Bit late for a walk, isn't it?"
Your mind races, searching for a plausible excuse. "I, uh... couldn't sleep. Thought I'd grab some ice."
"Ice?" Oscar's brow furrows slightly, "At this hour?"
"Yeah, you know... for my water," you say lamely, cringing at how unconvincing you sound. "Helps me... think better. For work."
"Right," Oscar says slowly, clearly not buying it but too polite to press further. "Well, don't let me keep you from your... ice-enhanced thinking."
You force a laugh. "Thanks. Goodnight, Oscar."
As you hurry past him, you can feel his curious gaze on your back. You silently pray he doesn't mention this encounter to anyone else on the team.
One of the main reasons why you agreed to mess around with Lando without a label was exactly that, the fear of putting your job at risk. You worked hard for it, and you would never forgive yourself if you lost it due to getting in a relationship with one of the drivers.
Which lead you to getting in a goddamn situationship.
Finally reaching room 507, you knock softly. Lando opens the door almost immediately, pulling you inside with a grin.
"Took you long enough," he teases, his arms wrapping around your waist.
"Yeah, well, I just had to convince your teammate that I'm wandering the halls at 1 AM in search of ice. So thanks for that," you retort, but there's no real annoyance in your voice.
"You ran into Oscar?" Lando's eyes widen, "What did you tell him?"
"That I needed ice. For thinking."
"Ice for thinking?" he bursts out laughing. "That's the best you could come up with?"
"Hey, you try coming up with a believable excuse on the spot!" you protest, swatting his arm playfully.
"Fair enough," Lando concedes, still chuckling. "Now, where were we? I believe you were going to help me with some... performance analysis?"
As Lando leans in, your lips meet in a passionate kiss. The tension that's been building all day finally releases as you melt into his embrace. His hands roam your body, pulling you closer as the kiss deepens.
"I've been thinking about this all day," he murmurs, his voice low and husky.
"Oh really?" you tease, running your fingers through his hair. "I thought you were supposed to be focusing on your lap times."
"Who says I can't do both?"
Lando's lips find your neck, trailing kisses along your jawline. You tilt your head back, a soft sigh escaping your lips. Your hands slide under his t-shirt, tracing his sides.
He guides you towards the bed, your bodies pressed close together. As the back of your knees hit the mattress, you fall back, pulling Lando with you. He hovers over you, his weight supported on his forearms.
"You're beautiful," he whispers, his eyes roaming your face.
You reach up to cup his cheek, drawing him down for another kiss. This one is slower, deeper, filled with unspoken emotions.
As things heat up, clothes start to come off. Lando's shirt is the first to go, followed quickly by yours. Skin meets skin, and the world narrows down to just the two of you, lost in each other's touch.
The night stretches on, filled with whispered words, soft moans, and the rustle of sheets. You can't help but think that this undefined thing with Lando is getting more complicated by the day but you decide that's a problem for future you to worry about.
After an exhausting triple header across three different countries, you finally have a well-deserved two-week break.
The past few races have been grueling, with long nights analyzing data and strategizing for each track. While you love your job, the intense schedule has left you drained. Now back home, you decide it's time to unwind and have some fun with your friends.
It's Friday evening, and you're getting ready for a girls' night out. Usually, youâd spend your Friday with Lando, but this time you were dying for a chance to let loose, dance with your friends and forget about work for a while.Â
And maybe, forget about your little situationship, too.
Speak of the devil and he shall appear, they say. Because as if on cue your phone starts buzzing with an incoming FaceTime call. Lando's name flashes on the screen.
You answer, propping the phone up on your dresser. "Hey, Lan," you greet him while still doing your makeup.
"Hey, you," he replies, his eyes widening slightly as he takes in your appearance. "Wow, you look hot. Are you going somewhere?"
You nod, turning back to the mirror to continue applying your eyeshadow. "Yep, heading out tonight. It's been ages since I've had a proper night out."
"Oh," Lando says, his tone curious. "Like, out out? Are you... um, going on a date or something?"
You can't help but smirk a little at his barely concealed interest. "Why, Lando Norris, are you fishing for information?" you tease. "I mean, I could be going on a date. We're not exclusive, after all."
Lando's expression falters for a moment before he catches himself, forcing a casual laugh. "No, no, of course not. I was just, you know, curious. Making conversation and all that."
You watch him in the phone screen, noticing how he's trying to play it cool but failing miserably. His jaw is tense, and he's fidgeting more than usual.
Taking pity on him, you decide to put him out of his misery. "Relax, Lando. It's just girls' night. After that triple header, I need to blow off some steam with my friends."
"Oh, right. Cool, cool," the relief on his face is palpable, "That sounds fun."
"Were you jealous, Norris?" you raise an eyebrow at him.
"Me? Jealous? Nah," he scoffs, but the slight blush creeping up his neck betrays him. "I mean, like you said, we're not... you know."
"Exclusive," you finish for him, feeling a familiar twinge in your chest at the word.
"Right," Lando nods, looking a bit uncomfortable. "Anyway, I hope you have a great time tonight. You deserve it after all the hard work these past few weeks."
"Thanks, Lan. I plan to."
"Call me if you need me to pick you up," Lando assures, making you smile softly. Maybe he actually cares about you, you think.
"Don't worry, I can handle myself."
Just as Lando was expecting, you call him around 2 AM, asking if he could come pick you up from the club.
He doesnât think twice before heâs getting up, putting a hoodie on and grabbing his keys to leave the house.
His car pulls up outside the club about 15 minutes later. You make your way to the vehicle, sliding into the passenger seat with a giggle.
"Thanks for coming," you say, leaning towards him with a grin.
âOf course, love,â Lando looks you over, a playful smirk on his face. "Looks like someone had fun tonight."
âI did, but I missed you,â you say as he starts driving, youâre not sure if heâll take you to your place or his, but you donât want to sleep without him, "Oh! I have to tell you something,"
"Well do tell," he encourages, glancing at you with interest.
"There was this guy at the club," you begin, noticing how Lando's eyebrow quirks up. "He was really handsome, and he was flirting with me."
"Was he now?" Lando asks, his tone light but with an undercurrent of something else.
"Yup," you say, popping the 'p' sound. "I pushed him away. Because even though you might not be my boyfriend, I only want you. No one else."
Lando's lips curl into a pleased smile. "Is that so?" he says, his voice low and teasing. "And here I thought I was just your favorite Uber driver."
You burst into laughter, the sound filling the car. Then, feeling bold, you place your hand on his thigh. "Will you sleep with me tonight?"
Lando doesn't even flinch. Instead, he shoots you a mischievous look. "Just like that? Usually, I at least buy you dinner first."
You groan, moving your hand from his thigh but he quickly catches it and kisses your palm before resting it there again, âOf course Iâll stay with you, baby.â
As you arrive home, Lando helps you inside, his arm steady around your waist. You stumble a bit, giggling as you lean into him.
"Careful there," he says, "Let's get you sorted, shall we?"
He guides you to the kitchen, one hand on the small of your back. You hop onto a barstool, watching as he moves around your kitchen with surprising familiarity.
"Let's get some water in you," he says, filling a large glass. "And maybe some food too. When's the last time you ate?"
You scrunch your nose, trying to remember. "Um... before we went out? I think?"
Lando shakes his head, a fond smile on his face. "No wonder you're in this state. Drink this," he hands you the water, "and I'll make you a sandwich."
You sip the water obediently, watching him as he rummages through your fridge. "You don't have to do all this, you know," you say softly.
"I want to," he looks up at you, his eyes soft. "Let me take care of you, yeah?"
As you finish your water, he slides a plate with a sandwich in front of you. "Eat up, pretty girl. It'll help sober you up."
You take a bite, suddenly realizing how hungry you are. As you eat, Lando leans against the counter, watching you with amusement and something else you can't quite name.
"So," he says casually, "tell me about this handsome guy at the club."
You swallow your bite, looking up at him. "Jealous, Norris?"
"Just curious," he shrugs, a smirk playing at his lips. "You said you pushed him away?"
You nod, setting down the sandwich. "I did. He was nice, but... he wasn't you."
The words hang in the air between you, heavy with implication. Lando's eyes sparkle, but he doesn't say anything.
You slide off the barstool and step closer to him. Your hands find his chest and you lean in, pressing your lips to his. He kisses back, his hands settling on your waist, pulling you closer. The kiss deepens, and you feel a warmth spreading through you that has nothing to do with the alcohol.
But then Lando pulls away gently, resting his forehead against yours. "Let's go to sleep, pretty girl," he says, his voice low and a bit rough. "You need rest."
You pout, your fingers playing with the collar of his shirt. "But I want you," you whisper, leaning in so your lips are inches from his.
"And you can have me," he says softly, cupping your face with one hand. "But right now we're going to sleep."
You start to protest, but he silences you with a gentle kiss on the forehead. "Come on, let's get you to bed."
As he leads you to the bedroom, Lando's mind is in turmoil. He's acutely aware of the growing feelings he has for you - feelings that go far beyond the casual arrangement you've had so far. The way his heart races when you're near, the constant urge to make you smile, the fierce protectiveness he feels - it all points to something deeper, that both thrills and terrifies him.
But with these feelings comes a familiar fear. Commitment has always been hard for him. The demands of his career, the pressure of the public eye, the fear of letting someone down - they all contribute to his hesitation. And yet, as he looks at you now, soft and vulnerable in his arms, he can't help but wonder if you might be worth the risk.
In the bedroom, he helps you change into comfortable sleepwear. As you both lay down, you curl into his side, your head on his chest. The steady beat of his heart is soothing, and you feel yourself starting to drift off.
"Lando?" you ask, your voice sleepy.
"Hmm?" His hand is running through your hair, the gesture comforting.
"Do you push away the beautiful girls that come up to flirt with you? Like I did tonight?"
You feel his chest rise with a deep breath. There's a pause before he answers, "I do," he says softly. "There's only one girl I'm interested in."
You lift your head slightly, trying to look at him through heavy-lidded eyes. "Really? Who's that?"
He chuckles, the sound rumbling in his chest. "I think you know, pretty girl."
You're fighting sleep now, but you're determined to get an answer. "Well, I don't believe you," you mumble, the words slurring together. "Prove it."
Lando opens his mouth to reply, but he realizes you're already asleep, your breathing evening out. He looks down at you, a fond smile on his face. Pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead, he whispers, "Maybe I'll show you soon."
The Hungarian Grand Prix has just concluded, and the atmosphere in the McLaren garage is torn between elation and tension.
Oscar has claimed his first Formula 1 victory, a monumental achievement for him and the team. However, the circumstances of his win have left a bitter taste in Lando's mouth, casting a shadow over what should have been a moment of pure celebration for everyone.
You're standing off to the side, your mind racing. The strategy call wasn't yours directly, but as part of the team, you can't help feeling partly responsible for the decision that affected both drivers.
As Lando storms into the garage, his face like thunder, you brace yourself for the fallout. His usual easy-going demeanor is nowhere to be seen, replaced by a storm of anger and disappointment. You've seen Lando upset before, but this felt different.
"Lando," you start, reaching out to him, your voice soft and tentative.
"Save it," he snaps, his blue eyes flashing with anger as he brushes past you. The coldness in his voice makes you flinch. "I don't want to hear it. Not from you, not from anyone."
For the rest of the day, Lando avoids you like the plague. You take separate flights home so you don't really see him or hear from him after you left the circuit.
Over the next few days, you try reaching out via text, each message more desperate than the last. But they go unanswered, each 'read' receipt another twist of the knife. This isn't like Lando, to shut everyone out so completely. You can't help but wonder if this is about more than just the race.
Finally, unable to bear it any longer, you decide to go to his place. It's a risky move, you know, but the thought of leaving things like this is unbearable. Using the spare key he gave you months ago - a gesture that had felt so significant at the time - you let yourself in.
The apartment is quiet, but not empty. You can feel his presence, sense the tension in the air.
"Lando?" you call out, your voice echoing slightly in the silent space.
You hear movement from his bedroom, and soon enough he emerges, dressed to go out, and freezes when he sees you. His expression hardens, the warmth you're used to seeing in his eyes replaced by a cold, distant look. "What are you doing here?"
"We need to talk, Lando," you say, your voice firm despite the nervous flutter in your stomach. "You can't just shut me out like this. It's not fair, and it's not right."
"I don't have time for this right now," Lando's jaw clenches, his gaze darting away from yours, "I'm heading out."
"Of course you are," you say, unable to keep the bitterness from your voice. "Because going out and partying is so much easier than facing your problems, isn't it?"
His eyes narrow, a spark of anger igniting, "What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means you're running away," you say, taking a step closer. "From the race, from the team, from me. We're all just trying to do our best, Lando. The team made a call, and it worked out for the best. Why can't you see that?"
"Because it wasn't the best for me!" Lando explodes, his composure finally cracking. "Do you have any idea what it's like? To have victory in your grasp and then have it taken away? To be told that you're not good enough, that your teammate is the better choice?"
"That's not what happened, and you know it," you argue back, your own frustration bubbling over. "It was a strategic decision, not a judgment on your abilities. You're letting your ego cloud your judgment."
"My ego?" Lando's laugh is harsh and humorless, "That's rich, coming from someone who's never had to make these kinds of sacrifices."
The words hang in the air between you, sharp and cutting. You take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm of emotions inside you. You's never had an argument like this before.
"Fine," you say finally, your voice quiet but firm. "Go out if that's what you want. But don't call me when you're feeling lonely later tonight. I'm not just some convenient comfort for when you decide you need me."
Something flashes in Lando's eyes â hurt, perhaps, or regret. But it's quickly replaced by a hardness that makes your heart ache.
"Don't worry," he retorts, his voice cold. "I can always find another girl to keep me company. I don't need you for that."
The words hit you like a physical blow, and you take an involuntary step back. The undefined nature of your relationship, once thrilling in its potential, now feels like a weapon being used against you.
"Is that what this is to you?" you ask, your voice barely above a whisper. "Just a convenient arrangement? Someone to warm your bed when you can't find anyone else?"
Lando's expression softens for a moment, regret flickering across his features. But he doesn't take back his words. Instead, he turns away, his hand on the front door.
"You know your way out." And with that, he's out of the door.
A week later, Formula 1 has moved to the iconic Spa-Francorchamps circuit in Belgium. The air is thick with anticipation - not just for the upcoming race, but for the looming summer break that follows.
You've thrown yourself into your work, burying your emotions under a mountain of data analysis and strategy planning. The tension between you and Lando hasn't gone unnoticed by the team, but thankfully, everyone's too focused on the upcoming race to pry.
You haven't spoke to Lando after your argument at his place, and you blocked his number, leaving him unable to contact you.
As you make your way through the paddock, your arms full of printouts and your mind racing with tire degradation calculations, you spot a familiar figure approaching. Lando, clad in his McLaren team shirt, is walking purposefully in your direction. Your heart rate spikes, and you quickly duck into a nearby hospitality area, pretending to be engrossed in conversation with a group of engineers.
This dance continues throughout the day. Lando tries to catch your eye during the team briefing, but you keep your gaze fixed on your tablet. He lingers near your station in the garage, but you find urgent errands that take you elsewhere. It's exhausting, this game of cat and mouse, but you're not ready to face him - not yet.
As the day winds down, you're making your final rounds, double-checking that everything is set for tomorrow's practice sessions. The paddock is quieter now, most team members having retired for the evening.
You're so focused on your checklist that you don't notice the approaching footsteps until it's too late.
"We need to talk," Lando's voice, firm and tinged with frustration, breaks the silence.
You spin around and Lando stands before you, his blue eyes intense and determined. He's changed out of his team shirt into a simple t-shirt and jeans, his hair slightly tousled as if he's been running his hands through it.
"Lando, I-" you begin, but he cuts you off.
"No, don't give me another excuse," he says, stepping closer. "We've been dancing around each other all day. Enough is enough."
Before you can protest, he gently but firmly takes your arm and starts guiding you towards the McLaren motorhome. You could resist, but something in his tone, a note of desperation perhaps, makes you comply.
The motorhome is quiet and dimly lit as Lando leads you inside and up to the second level where the drivers have their private areas. He ushers you into his room, closing the door behind you.
The space is unmistakably Lando's - a gaming setup in one corner, a few personal photos tacked to a board, his race suit hanging neatly on a hook. The familiarity of it all makes your heart ache.
Lando runs a hand through his hair, pacing for a moment before turning to face you.
"I'm sorry," he blurts out, the words tumbling from his lips as if he's afraid he'll lose his nerve if he doesn't say them immediately. "I'm so sorry for how I acted, for what I said. It was awful, and you didn't deserve any of it."
You stand there, arms crossed, trying to maintain your composure even as a lot of emotions overwhelm you. "You were an asshole, Lando," you say quietly.
"I know," he nods, "I was angry and frustrated, but that's no excuse. I took it out on you when you were just trying to help." He takes a step closer, his eyes pleading. "I've been miserable this past week. I missed you so much, and the thought that I might have ruined everything between us⊠it's been killing me."
Despite your best efforts to stay strong, you feel your resolve weakening. You're weak when it comes to him, and you're pretty sure he knows it.
"I missed you too," you admit softly. "But Lando, we can't keep doing this. We can't just pretend everything's fine and then lash out at each other when things get tough."
"I know, I know," Lando nods eagerly. "I want to do better. I want to be better," he pauses for a moment, his gaze dropping to the floor before meeting your eyes again. "And I didn't go home with anyone that night, by the way,"
You furrow your brow, momentarily confused by the seemingly random statement. Then, like a flash, you remember his cruel words from that night in his house.
As you laid in bed the night of the argument, you couldn't help but wonder if Lando had gone home with someone else, and if that was how it worked when you were not there.
And it hurt more that you ever thought possible.
"Oh," you respond, aiming for nonchalance but not quite hitting the mark. "That's⊠I mean, you didn't have to tell me that. It's not like we'reâŠ"
You trail off, unsure how to finish that sentence. What are you, exactly?
Lando takes a step closer, his blue eyes intense as they lock with yours. "I know I don't have to tell you," he says, his voice low and earnest. "But I want you to know. I only want you to keep me company, not anyone else."
Your heart skips a beat at his words, a warmth spreading through your chest. But almost immediately, a more cynical part of your mind chimes in. He wants you, but he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you. He wants the comfort, the intimacy, but not the commitment.
"Lando, IâŠ" you begin, but the words catch in your throat. You want to ask for clarification, to define what this is between you, but fear holds you back.
Lando seems to sense your inner turmoil. He reaches out, gently taking your hand in his. "I know I messed up," he says softly. "And I know things between us are⊠complicated. But I mean what I said. You're the only one I want."
You look down at your joined hands, then back up at Lando's face. Despite despite the voice in your head warning you to be careful, you feel yourself giving in. The pull is too strong, the desire to be with him overpowering your rational mind.
"Okay," you whisper, squeezing his hand.
Lando's face breaks into a relieved smile, his eyes lighting up. He pulls you into another embrace, holding you close. You allow yourself to sink into his warmth, pushing your doubts to the back of your mind for now.
When you finally pull apart, Lando's expression is soft, almost reverent. "Are we good?" he asks, a hint of uncertainty in his voice.
You take a deep breath, considering the question. Are you good? There's still so much left unsaid, so many questions unanswered. But looking at Lando, feeling the comfort of his presence, you can't bring yourself to disrupt this moment of peace between you.
"Yes," you say, managing a small smile. "We're good."
The early morning sunlight filters through the curtains of Lando's Monaco apartment. You stir slowly, consciousness creeping in as you become aware of the warm body next to you. Opening your eyes, you're greeted by the sight of Lando's peaceful sleeping face, his features relaxed and vulnerable in a way they rarely are when he's awake.
It's been two weeks since your conversation in the motorhome at Spa, and true to form, you and Lando had fallen back into your familiar rhythm without missing a beat. The race weekend had gone well, with both McLarens finishing in the points, and you'd flown to Monaco with Lando for the first part of the summer break without a second thought.
As you watch Lando sleep, you can't help but feel that being here with him feels right in a way that's hard to describe. You know that this thing between you, whatever it is, is a ticking time bomb if you don't define it soon. But every time you think about approaching the subject, fear holds you back.
So you've chosen to ignore it, to live in this blissful bubble for as long as you can. You tell yourself that you'll deal with it later, after the summer break, after the next race, after the season ends. There's always a reason to put it off.
Lando begins to stir, his eyelids fluttering open. When his gaze focuses on you, a slow, sleepy smile spreads across his face. "Morning, beautiful," he murmurs, his voice husky with sleep.
"Morning," you reply softly, unable to help the smile that mirrors his.
Lando reaches out, his hand cupping your cheek as he leans in for a kiss. It starts soft and sweet, but quickly deepens as he pulls you closer. His other hand trails down your side, leaving goosebumps in its wake. You sigh into the kiss, your own hands exploring the familiar planes of his chest and back.
As things start to heat up, Lando rolls you onto your back, hovering over you. His lips leave yours to trail kisses along your jaw and down your neck. You arch into him, your fingers tangling in his hair.
Just as things are about to progress further, there's a sharp knock at the front door.
"Ignore it," Lando whispers, leaning in to capture your lips again.
You lose yourself in the kiss for a moment before another, more insistent knock breaks through. Lando groans in frustration, dropping his forehead to your shoulder.
"I should probably see who that is," he sighs, reluctantly pulling away.
You watch as he gets out of bed, admiring the view as he pulls on a pair of sweatpants before heading downstairs.
Curious about who could be visiting so early, you decide to follow after a few minutes. You grab Lando's discarded t-shirt from the night before, pulling it on. It falls to mid-thigh, long enough to be decent for a quick peek downstairs.
As you descend the stairs, you hear familiar voices from the entryway. Your heart drops as you recognize the second voice - it's Max Verstappen. Panic sets in as you realize the compromising position you're in, but it's too late. You've already rounded the corner, coming face to face with both drivers.
For a moment, everything freezes. You stand there, a deer caught in headlights, wearing nothing but Lando's shirt. Max's eyes widen in surprise, darting between you and Lando. Lando looks equally shocked, clearly not expecting you to come downstairs.
Mortified, you turn on your heel and bolt back upstairs, your cheeks burning with embarrassment. As you retreat, you hear Max's voice, tinged with amusement and surprise.
"Dude, isn't that one of your strategists?"
You don't hear Lando's response as you shut the bedroom door behind you. This is exactly the kind of situation you'd been afraid of, the reason why leaving things undefined was so dangerous.
Downstairs, the conversation continues.
"Yeah, she is," Lando admits, running a hand through his hair nervously.
"Wow, okay," Max lets out a low whistle, "So⊠how long has this been going on? Please tell me it's recent and not, like, during the season or something."
Lando hesitates for a moment before answering. "It's⊠been a while actually. Over a year."
"A YEAR?!" Max exclaims, his voice rising in disbelief. "Lando, mate, are you serious? You've been hooking up with a team member for over a year and nobody knew?"
"It's not just hooking up," Lando defends, though his voice lacks conviction. "It's⊠complicated."
"Complicated?" Max raises an eyebrow, "Sounds like a disaster waiting to happen if you ask me. Does the team know?"
"No," Lando shakes his head, "And I'd appreciate it if you didn't say anything. It's not affecting our work, so no one needs to know."
"Hey, not my circus, not my monkeys," Max holds up his hands in surrender, "But seriously, Lando, be careful. This kind of thing can blow up in your face if you're not careful."
They exchange a few more words before Max takes his leave, reminding Lando about their plans for later in the week. As soon as the door closes behind Max, Lando bounds up the stairs, taking them two at a time.
He finds you in the bedroom, already dressed in own clothes. You're pacing nervously, chewing on your bottom lip - a habit he knows you fall into when you're anxious.
"Hey," he says softly, approaching you cautiously. "I'm sorry about that. I didn't expect Max to show up unannounced."
You stop pacing, turning to face him. "It's fine," you say, but your voice is tight. "I should go."
"What? No, please don't go," Lando's face falls, "Max won't say anything, I promise. He may be a bit of a prat sometimes, but he can keep a secret."
"I'll just have a walk around the harbor, I'll be back," you say as you grab your phone from the nightstand.
"But why?" Lando asks, a note of panic creeping into his voice. "Is this because Max saw you? I swear, it's not a big deal."
"I'll meet you for lunch, okay? you say softly, avoiding Lando's gaze.
"Okay," he replies simply, not pushing for more.
Without further conversation, you gather your belongings and head for the door. Feeling more conflicted than ever before.
After Max caught you together in Monaco, you stayed a few more days with Lando before reluctantly going back home, and he took on a trip with his family. You don't really see him for the rest of the summer break, until he showed up at your place two weeks before it was time to get back to work.
"So," Lando says as you laid in bed, "ready to go back to being all professional and proper soon, Ms. Strategist?"
"Oh, I'm always professional, Norris. It's you who can't keep your eyes off me during briefings."
"Me? Lando gasps in mock offense, "I'll have you know I'm the picture of focus and concentration."
"Sure," you drawl, "That's why you kept 'accidentally' brushing against me in the garage."
He leans in closer, his voice dropping to a husky whisper. "Can you blame me? You're irresistible when you're talking about tire strategies."
You laugh, pushing him away playfully, trying to ignore the flutter in your stomach at his proximity. "Smooth talker. Is that how you charm all the girls?"
"Nah," he grins, pulling you back towards him. "Just the brilliant, beautiful ones who can calculate pit stop windows in their sleep."
Your breath catches as he nuzzles your neck, his stubble tickling your skin. For a moment, you consider bringing up the conversation you've been avoiding all summer. "Lando," you murmur, "we should probably talk about-"
He silences you with a kiss, deep and passionate. "Or," he says, his eyes dark with desire, "we could make the most of our night."
You know you should resist, that you should have that conversation you've been avoiding. But as Lando's hands start to wander, you find your resolve weakening, as always.
You don't really hear from Lando after that night. He says goodbye after breakfast the following day, and then it's radio silence.
You try not to think too much of it, the break is coming to an end and he has responsibilities and work to go, it's not personal, you try to convince yourself.
But your mind can't help but wander. Is he with someone else? Is he avoiding you? Did you make him upset and you failed to notice?
But you don't dare to bring it up to him. He's not your boyfriend, after all.
The transition back to work after the summer break is jarring. The McLaren Technology Centre buzzes with activity as everyone prepares for the upcoming race. You're immediately swept up in meetings, data analysis, and strategy sessions. Despite working in the same building, you and Lando barely cross paths for days. The few times you do see him from afar, he's always surrounded by engineers or caught up in simulator work.
Finally, the team arrives at Zandvoort Circuit for the Dutch Grand Prix. The atmosphere of the paddock envelops you as you make your way to the McLaren garage, your arms full of strategy documents and your mind racing with last-minute considerations for the race.
As you approach, you spot Lando and Oscar chatting animatedly near the entrance. Your heart does a little flip at the sight of Lando, and you can't help but smile. You've missed him more than you care to admit.
"Morning, boys," you call out, aiming for a casual tone as you near them.
They both turn, matching grins spreading across their faces. "Hey there, stranger," Lando says, his eyes twinkling with that familiar mischief that never fails to make your stomach flutter.
Oscar, ever the gentleman, moves to take some of the papers from your arms. "Let me help you with those. How was your break?"
You smile gratefully, handing him a stack of documents. "Thanks, Oscar. It was lovely, very relaxing. How about yours?"
As Oscar launches into a story about his time back home in Australia and his trip with his girlfriend, you can't help but steal glances at Lando.
He looks good - tanned and relaxed, with a hint of stubble that you know from experience feels delightfully rough against your skin. You quickly push that thought aside, reminding yourself of where you are.
"Oh, that reminds me," Oscar says suddenly, turning to Lando with a sly grin. "How did that lunch go the other day? With Emma?"
You feel your body tense involuntarily. Lunch? Emma? Who's Emma?
Lando's eyes widen slightly, and he shoots a quick glance your way before looking back at Oscar. "Oh, uh, it was fine. Just a casual thing, you know."
But Oscar, oblivious to the sudden tension, presses on. "Come on, mate, don't be modest. Emma told Lily it went really well. Said you two really hit it off."
You feel as if all the air has been sucked out of your lungs. The documents in your arms suddenly feel impossibly heavy.
Lando runs a hand through his hair, a nervous habit you've come to recognize. "It wasn't⊠I mean, it was just lunch, Oscar. Don't make a big deal out of it."
"I'm just saying," Oscar continues, still grinning, "she seems really into you. Might be worth giving it a shot, yeah? It's about time you settled down with someone nice."
You can't bear to hear any more. "I should get these to the engineers," you mutter, already turning away. "See you guys later."
As you walk away, you hear Lando call out your name, but you don't stop. You can't stop. If you stop, you might fall apart right there in the middle of the paddock.
You make it to the back of the garage before you hear rapid footsteps behind you. "Hey, wait up," Lando's voice comes from behind you, slightly out of breath.
You turn slowly, trying to school your features into a neutral expression. "What is it, Lando? I'm kind of busy."
He looks at you, his eyes searching your face. "About what Oscar said⊠it's not what you think."
"What do I think, Lando?" you raise an eyebrow, fighting to keep your voice steady. "We never defined what this is, remember? You're free to have lunch with whoever you want."
"It was just a favor for Oscar," Lando steps closer, lowering his voice. "His girlfriend's friend is new in town, and they asked if I'd show her around. That's all it was, I swear."
You want to believe him. God, how you want to believe him. But the memory of those blissful days during the summer break, followed by days of silence and now this⊠it's too much.
"Look, Lando," you say, hating how your voice wavers slightly, "we both knew this couldn't last. We have jobs to do, careers to think about. Maybe⊠maybe this is for the best."
"What? No, that's notâŠ" Lando starts, reaching for your arm, but you step back.
"I really need to get these to the engineers," you say, gesturing with the documents still clutched to your chest like a shield. "We should both focus on the race this weekend. That's what we're here for, right?"
Without waiting for a response, you turn and walk away, your vision blurring slightly as you blink back tears. You can feel Lando's gaze boring into your back, but you don't turn around. You can't.
As you round the corner, out of sight from the main garage, you lean against the wall for a moment, taking deep breaths to compose yourself. The rational part of your brain knows you're overreacting, that you should hear Lando out. But the emotional part, the part that's been dreading this moment since this situationship began, is in full fight or flight mode.
With one final deep breath, you push off the wall and head towards the engineering room, burying your personal turmoil beneath layers of race strategy and tire calculations. Lando Norris was consuming every part of you.
The tension between you and Lando remains palpable throughout the race weekend. You both maintain focused on your jobs, but there's a hint that something is not right with you.
The truth is, your situation with Lando has been consuming you for weeks now. What started as a casual arrangement has grown into something much deeper, at least for you.
The more time you spend with Lando, the harder you fall for him. And it's terrifying. Being casual isn't enough anymore; it hasn't been for a while. You've reached a point where you don't think you can continue this way. The pain of loving him in secret, of always being on the edge of something more but never quite reaching it, is becoming unbearable. You need clarity, commitment - or you need to walk away before you lose yourself completely.
To make matters more complicated, Lando wins the race at Zandvoort, securing his second victory of the seasonâone he had been craving since Miami. Your heart breaks even more as you realize you can't even celebrate this moment with him properly. Watching him on the podium, champagne in hand and pure joy radiating from his face, you feel like crying right there.
You want to run to him, throw yourself into his arms and celebrate with him, tell him how proud you feel and how much he deserves this. But you can't, not until whatever is going on between you gets sorted out.
It's not until after the race, when the celebrations cool down and the team begins to pack up, that Lando finally corners you in a quiet moment.
"Can we talk?" he asks, his voice low and urgent. "Please?"
You hesitate, glancing around the garage. Most of the team is busy with post-race duties, paying you no attention. With a sigh, you nod and follow Lando to a more secluded area behind the motorhome.
"First of all, congratulations on the win. You really deserve it," you say as soon as you're alone, trying to keep your voice steady.
Lando gives you a bittersweet smile. "Thanks, but that's not what occupies my mind right now," he replies, his eyes searching yours with an intensity that makes your heart race, "I don't understand what happened back there. Why won't you believe me about Oscar's friend?"
You cross your arms, a defensive posture you're all too aware of. "It's not just about her, Lando. It's⊠everything."
"What do you mean, everything?" he asks, brow furrowed.
"I mean this whole situation," you take a deep breath, trying to organize your thoughts, "I thought I could handle it, butâŠ"
"But what?" Lando steps closer, his voice softening, "Talk to me, please."
"But it's getting harder," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. "Every time I see you with someone else, every time we have to pretend there's nothing between us, it hurts a little more."
Lando reaches for your hand, and this time you don't pull away. "You're the only one I want," he says earnestly. "You have to know that."
You let out a humorless laugh, shaking your head. "You always say that, Lando. But you still won't fully commit to me. It's hard to believe it when you won't put a label on us, when you go out with other women-"
"That wasn't a date," Lando interrupts, a hint of frustration creeping into his voice. "I told you, it was just a favor for Oscar."
"I know, I know," you say, pulling your hand away and running it through your hair. "But that's not the point. The point is, I don't know where I stand with you. We've been doing this dance for over a year now, and I still don't know what we are to each other."
"I thought you were okay with this. With us staying without a label. You agreed to keep things casual."
"I was okay with it," you turn away, blinking back tears. "But it's not enough anymore. At least, not for me."
There's a long moment of silence. When you turn back, Lando is staring at the ground, his hands shoved deep in his pockets.
"What are you saying?" he asks finally, his voice small.
"I'm saying that I can't do this anymore, Lando," you say firmly, "I want more. I need more."
"We agreed it was too complicted," Lando looks up at you, his eyes wide and vulnerable, "That we couldn't be in a relationship."
"I know what we agreed," you say, your voice cracking slightly. "But feelings change. People change. I've changed, Lando. And I can't keep putting my heart on hold for a someday that might never come."
Lando steps forward, reaching for you again. "Please, don't do this. We can figure it out. I'll try to be more open about us. We can tell our friends."
You shake your head, cutting him off. "It's not just about telling people, Lando. It's about commitment. It's about knowing that when I go home at night, I'm not just someone in your bed. It's about building a future together, not just living for the moment."
"I don't know if I can give you that. Not right now," Lando's face falls. "My career is at a great point, and-"
"And mine isn't?" you interrupt, a flash of anger cutting through your sadness. "Do you think I'm not risking just as much as you are? If not more? But I'm willing to take that risk because what we have⊠what we could have⊠it's worth it to me."
You watch as emotions play across Lando's face - confusion, fear, longing. Finally, he speaks, his voice barely audible. "I don't want to lose you."
Your heart aches, but you stand your ground. "Then give me a reason to stay, Lando. Show me that I'm more than just a convenient distraction between races."
Lando opens his mouth to respond, but you hold up a hand to stop him. "Don't answer now. Think about it. Really think about what you want. Because I can't keep going on like this. It's not fair to either of us."
With that, you turn and walk away, leaving Lando standing alone behind the motorhome. As you make your way back to the garage, you can feel the weight of unshed tears burning behind your eyes. But you don't let them fall. Not here, not now.
You've laid your cards on the table. Now it's up to Lando to decide what he's willing to do with them.
The Monza race weekend flies by in a whirlwind of noise and action. You keep yourself busy, diving deep into numbers and race plans to avoid thinking about your feelings. It's easier to focus on tire strategies and pit stop timings than to deal with the ache in your chest every time you see Lando.
When you do have to talk to Lando, you both act normal and professional. But there's a tension in the air between you, like a tight rubber band ready to snap. You catch others giving you worried looks sometimes, and it makes you feel even more on edge.
Lando has not given you any kind of response to your talk in Zandvoort, and it's been just a week, but you feel like you know his answer. He's not willing to give you what you ask for. And it hurts, more than you can say.
As Sunday night gets closer, whispers of Carlos Sainz's birthday celebration begin to circulate through the paddock. You know Lando will definitely go - he and Carlos are really close friends. A small part of you wishes you could go too. You imagine laughing with your coworkers, having a drink, and forgetting about all the drama for a while.
But then you think about seeing Lando there. You picture having to smile and act like everything's fine when it's not. The thought of making awkward small talk with him, or worse, seeing him chatting happily with someone else, makes your stomach churn. It feels like too much to handle right now.
In the end, the thought of facing Lando and all those people is just too much. You decide to skip the party, even though a part of you feels guilty and a bit left out. But the relief you feel at making this decision tells you it's the right choice for now.
As the sun begins to set after the race and everyone gets ready for the party, you retreat to your hotel room. You order room service â a plate of pasta that you barely touch â and settle in for a quiet evening alone. You try to lose yourself in a book, but the words blur on the page, your mind constantly wandering to thoughts of Lando. Is he at the party now? Is he having fun? Is he thinking of you at all?
Meanwhile, at Carlos' birthday celebration, Lando finds himself struggling to enjoy the party. He mingles half-heartedly, his laugh a beat too late, his smile not quite reaching his eyes. He can't help but scan the room periodically, hoping against hope that you might have changed your mind and decided to come.
Max, observant as ever and knowing his friend too well, notices Lando's distraction and pulls him aside.
"You alright, mate?" Max asks, "You look like you'd rather be anywhere but here."
Lando sighs, running a hand through his hair. "Is it that obvious?"
Max nods, taking a sip of his drink. "Want to talk about it?"
For a moment, Lando considers brushing it off, but the weight of the past week suddenly feels too heavy to bear alone. "It's about her," he admits quietly.
Max doesn't need to ask who 'her' is. By now he knows the situation his friend is caught up in, "Trouble in paradise?" he asks.
"More like paradise lost," Lando lets out a humorless laugh, "I think I really messed up, Max. I was so worried about keeping things casual, about not complicating our working relationship, that I didn't realize how fucked up the whole thing was."
"So what are you going to do about it?" Max asks.
Lando looks around the room, at the laughing faces and clinking glasses, and suddenly feels very out of place. "I don't know. I just know I can't be here right now. Not when things are like this between us."
"Then go," he says simply. "Go find her. Talk to her. Life's too short for regrets, especially in our line of work."
Lando looks at Max, a hint of his usual playful smile returning despite the situation. "When did you become so wise, Verstappen? Did all those championship trophies finally knock some sense into you?"
"Someone has to be the voice of reason around here," Max rolls his eyes, but there's a fond smile on his face, "Now go on, get out of here before Carlos finds you and makes you stay, I'll distract him."
"Thanks, Max. I owe you one," Lando chuckles, patting his back.
"You owe me several, but who's counting?" Max grins, clapping Lando on the shoulder. "Now go get your girl."
With a newfound sense of purpose, Lando slips out of the party. His heart pounds as he makes his way to your hotel, not even sure if you would want to talk to him.
When he's finally standing in front of you door, he knocks softly, hope and fear warring in his chest as he waits for you to answer.
You're curled up on the bed, still trying and failing to focus on your book, when you hear the knock. Confused, you glance at the clock - it's barely past 10 PM. The party should still be in full swing. Who could be at your door?
As you pad over to the door and peer through the peephole, your breath catches in your throat. It's Lando, looking slightly disheveled, his hands shoved deep in his pockets.
You hesitate, your hand on the doorknob. Part of you wants to fling the door open and throw yourself into his arms. But another part, the part that's been hurt and confused for the past week, holds you back.
Taking a deep breath to steady yourself, you slowly open the door, trying to keep your expression neutral despite the emotions inside you.
"Lando?" you say, trying to sound calm even though your heart is racing. "What are you doing here? I thought you'd be at Carlos' party."
Lando looks a bit messy, like he rushed over. He shifts from foot to foot, looking nervous. "I was," he says. "But I couldn't stay. Not when you weren't there."
You lean against the doorframe, crossing your arms. You're trying to protect yourself, even though you want to believe him. "You left your best friend's birthday party early because of me?"
Lando nods, looking right at you. His eyes are so intense it makes your heart beat even faster. "Can I come in? I think we need to talk."
You hesitate for a moment. You're scared of getting hurt again, but you also really want to hear what he has to say, even if it breaks your heart. Finally, you step back and let him in.
As he passes by, you catch a whiff of his cologne mixed with the faint scent of the paddock - a combination that's uniquely Lando and achingly familiar.
Lando walks into the room, running a hand through his hair. "I've been doing a lot of thinking this past week," he begins, turning to face you. "About us."
Your heart starts to race, but you force yourself to remain calm. "And?" you prompt, when he doesn't continue.
"And you were right. About everything," Lando takes a deep breath, "I've been so focused on not complicating things, that I didn't realize how much I was hurting you.â
"Lando, I-"
"Please, let me finish," Lando interrupts you softly, "The truth is, I've been scared. Terrified, actually. Of commitment, of letting someone in completely, of potentially damaging our careers if things went wrong. But this past week without you⊠it's been hell", he takes a step closer to you, his voice dropping to a near whisper. "I've dated before, had relationships, but nothing has ever felt like this. What we have⊠it's different. Special. And I've been an idiot for not seeing it sooner."
Your breath catches in your throat as Lando continues, his words coming faster now, as if he's afraid he'll lose his nerve if he doesn't get them all out. "I kept telling myself that keeping things casual was the smart thing to do. That it was protecting both of us. But all I've done is push you away and make you doubt how much you mean to me."
He runs a hand through his hair, a gesture you've seen him do countless times when he's nervous or frustrated. "The truth is, I'm crazy about you. I think about you all the time. When something good happens, you're the first person I want to tell. When something goes wrong, you're the one I want to turn to. And it scares the hell out of me because I've never felt this way about anyone before."
Your heart is pounding so hard you're sure Lando must be able to hear it. You want to speak, to tell him how much his words mean to you, but you can see he's not finished yet.
"I know I've messed up. I know I've hurt you by not being clear about my feelings, by not giving you the commitment you deserve. And I'm so, so sorry for that," Lando's voice cracks slightly, and you can see the sincerity in his eyes. "But if you're willing to give me another chance, I want to do this right. No more hiding, no more pretending we're just casual. I want to be with you, properly. I want to tell our friends, take you on proper dates. I want everything."
He takes another step closer, close enough now that you can feel the warmth radiating from his body. "I can't promise it'll be easy. Our careers, the media attention, the travel - it's all going to be complicated. But I'm willing to fight for this, for us, if you are."
You stand there, momentarily stunned by Lando's words. Your mind is racing, trying to process everything he's just said. You've dreamed of hearing something like this from him for so long, but now that it's happening, you find yourself almost paralyzed.
Taking a shaky breath, you finally find your voice. "Lando, I⊠I don't know what to say. This is everything I've wanted to hear from you, but I'm scared too. What if we try this and it doesn't work out? What if we end up ruining our friendship, our work relationship?"
Lando's hand finally makes contact with your cheek, his touch impossibly gentle. "Those are all valid fears," he says softly. "And I'd be lying if I said I wasn't worried about the same things. But I think what we have is worth the risk. Don't you?"
You lean into his touch, your eyes closing for a moment as you savor the feeling. When you open them again, you see Lando looking at you with such tenderness it makes your heart ache.
"I do," you whisper. "I really do. But Lando, I need you to be sure, if we do this, I need all of you. No more half measures, no more hiding."
Lando nods, his thumb gently caressing your cheek. "I'm sure. I want all of you, and I want to give you all of me in return."
The sincerity in his voice, the look in his eyes - it's everything you've been longing for. Unable to resist any longer, you close the distance between you and press your lips to Lando's. The kiss is soft at first, tentative, as if you're both afraid this moment might shatter. But then Lando's arms wrap around you, pulling you closer, and the kiss deepens.
It's not your first kiss, not by a long shot, but it feels different this time. There's a promise in this kiss, a commitment that wasn't there before.
You pour all your pent-up emotions - the longing, the frustration, the love you've been holding back. Lando responds with equal passion, one hand tangling in your hair while the other presses against the small of your back.
When you finally break apart, Lando rests his forehead against yours, a smile playing on his lips.
"I've missed you so much," he murmurs. The relief and happiness that flood Lando's face are beautiful to see.
"I've missed you too," you admit. "More than I wanted to admit, even to myself."
Lando's hands start to wander, tracing patterns on your back that make you shiver, you melt at his touch, but then your mind starts racing again.
"Where do we go from here, Lan?" you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.
Lando takes a moment to consider your question, his hands still gently caressing your back. He pulls back slightly to look into your eyes, his expression a mix of tenderness and determination.
"Well," he starts, a small smile playing on his lips, "I think we take it one step at a time. We don't need to rush anything, but we also don't need to hide anymore."
You nod, encouraging him to continue.
"First things first," Lando says, his voice growing more confident, "I want to take you on a proper date. No sneaking around, no pretending we're just colleagues grabbing a quick bite. I want to take you somewhere nice, hold your hand in public, and not care who sees us."
The thought makes your heart flutter. "I'd like that," you reply softly.
You wrap your arms around him, feeling a sense of peace settle over you. For the first time in a long while, you feel truly happy and hopeful about the future.
"So," Lando says after a moment, a hint of mischief in his voice, "since I left Carlos' party early to come here... does that mean I get to stay the night?"
You laugh, playfully swatting his arm. "Cheeky," you tease, but there's no real accusation in your voice. Instead, you lean in and kiss him.
As the kiss intensifies, you both start moving towards the bed, hands roaming and clothes starting to come off. This time, there's no holding back, no pretending this is just a casual thing. Every touch, every kiss is infused with the promise of something lasting.
Two weeks later, you're in Baku for the Azerbaijan Grand Prix.
You're in the McLaren garage, eyes fixed on your tablet as you analyze the latest telemetry data. The familiar sounds of mechanics working and engineers discussing strategy fill the air, but you're completely focused on your task.
Suddenly, you sense a pair of eyes on you. Without turning, a smile tugs at your lips. You know exactly who it is.
"See something you like?" you ask playfully, still not looking up from your work.
You hear a low chuckle, then feel a warm presence behind you. "Just admiring my girlfriend," Lando's voice is soft, meant only for your ears.
He wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you gently against him. His lips brush your shoulder in a tender kiss that sends a shiver down your spine.
The past fortnight has been a whirlwind of emotions and adjustments. True to his word, Lando has taken you on proper dates and you've made your relationship official. You still feel giddy every time Lando calls you his girlfriend, a fact that hasn't escaped his notice. He seems to take particular joy in introducing you as such, his eyes always seeking out your reaction.
"How's the data looking?" he says, giving you a quick squeeze.
"Pretty good, actually," you turn back to your tablet, but remain in his loose embrace. "Your last practice session showed some promising improvements in sector two."
"That's my girl," Lando murmurs, pride evident in his voice. "Always making me look good."
You chuckle, elbowing him gently. "You do that all on your own, superstar. I just provide the numbers."
You turn in Lando's arms, facing him with a soft smile. The garage bustles around you, but in this moment, it feels like you're in your own little bubble.
"You know," you say, your voice low, "I never thought I'd be standing here like this with you. In the middle of the garage, no less."
Lando's eyes crinkle as he grins, his hands resting comfortably on your waist. "Having second thoughts?" he teases.
"Not at all," you shake your head, your smile widening. "It's just different. Good different."
"The best kind of different," Lando agrees, echoing his words from that night in your hotel room.
"I should probably get back to work," you say reluctantly, not making any move to step away.
Lando nods, but doesn't loosen his hold on you. "Probably," he agrees, a mischievous glint in his eye. "But firstâŠ"
He leans in, pressing a quick but tender kiss to your lips. It's brief, mindful of your surroundings, but filled with promise.
As he pulls back, you can't help but laugh softly. "You're incorrigible, you know that?"
"You love it," Lando grins, finally releasing you from his embrace.
"I do," you admit, your heart full. "Now go on, superstar. You've got a car to drive soon."
As you watch him blow you a kiss which made you throw your head back in laughter as he left, your heart feels full.
You and Lando. Lando and You. Finally, together.
#lando norris#lando norris x reader#f1#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 smut#f1 fluff#f1 imagine#lando norris smut#lando norris imagine#lando norris fluff#ln4 x you#ln4 x reader#ln4#charles leclerc#harrysfolklore#f1 x reader#formula 1 reader#formula 1 fanfiction#1k
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Give Me One More
Pairing: Soft!Dark Bucky Barnes x Female Reader
Summary: You don't need Bucky. He's going to prove you wrong. Over and over and over...
Word Count: Over 3.7k
Warnings: DUBCON to be safe, explicit sexual content, unprotected vaginal sex, oral sex (f. receiving), overstimulation, masturbation, established and slightly toxic relationship, pet names, possessive behavior, family drama, betrayal, threats (not against reader), loose backstory, slight feels (it's me, okay?), Bucky Barnes (he's a warning and a bit mean, okay?).
A/N: I spoke about prisoner!Bucky ages back and I couldn't let this go. Especially not when I'm looking at that beautiful edit by the more beautiful @nixakimbo! â€ïžNot beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own (but thanks to @whisperlullaby for discussing this man with me!). Divider by the talented @saradika. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
You pushed the curtain aside to look out the bedroom window, the clouds dark and thick in the sky. Your home used to be your safe haven, a place of comfort, and all you wanted to do now was escape from your prison of sorts. Not the kind of place your boyfriend, Bucky, spent time in. The bars that kept you in couldn't be seen by the naked eye.
âCan't stay in there all day,â Bucky said from the hall, his deep voice reminding you that you weren't alone.
Youâd never be alone again.
âYes, I can,â you called back. You had been in your bedroom for well over an hour since you snapped at him and left him alone in the living room. If staying in there meant avoiding him, you were fine with that.
You half expected him to stomp down the hall, but he only said, âYouâre being a fucking brat.â
Blood rushed to your cheeks as anger flowed through you. âLeave me alone, asshole!â You shouted, feeling every bit like the brat he said you were.
You werenât sure what set you off today. It could've been because you were still angry that Bucky used you. How long did it take for an empire to fall? In your case, six months.
Half a year ago, Bucky Barnes bumped into you at your favorite coffee shop. Literally. He was large, built like a powerhouse, but his grip that kept you from falling was so gentle. One look in his cerulean eyes and you were a goner. He easily charmed his way into your life and bed. He treated you like a princess, better than any boyfriend before, and you naively believed it was fate that brought you together.
You shouldâve known it wasn't the beginning of a happy new chapter in your story. It was a clock winding down to your doom. More specifically, your fatherâs doom. Because Bucky wanted to destroy the man who helped land him in jail.
The White Wolf, a nickname for Bucky you recently learned about, wasn't a good man. Far from it and far from being a reformed criminal. He took it personally that your dad got him put behind bars for a short time. So he tore his life apart. Took his job away. Urged his friends to abandon or turn on him. Got him put in jail. Bucky even rubbed it in his face that he fucked his daughter. All in six months.
It would almost be impressive if you weren't the one living with the aftermath.
Had your dad known exactly who you were seeing, he may have tried to stop you.
âAsshole,â you muttered.
What Bucky didn't plan on was falling for you or so he said. You were, apparently, his chance at happiness. Because of that, he wouldn't let you go. And he expected you to just forgive him and move forward.
How could you forgive him?
He promised heâd hunt you down if you tried to leave him. You naturally tried and didn't get very far. The sick part was how much you enjoyed him chasing after you and bringing you back. After he fucked you where he found you.
As if he read your mind, he called out, âI know you're frustrated. Bet if you sit on my cock you'll feel better.â
Your cheeks flamed, your panties damp. Damn him for still arousing you with so little words. âGo fuck yourself.â
That actually wasn't a bad idea. He was right. You were frustrated and itching to get out of your own skin. Maybe if you got yourself off, youâd feel a little better. Not happy, but better.
âI don't need him,â you said.
That was what you told yourself as you stripped down and got on the bed. But as you ran your hands along your breasts, gasping as you moved one hand lower, it didn't feel right. The normal fire within you didn't burn. Didn't even a flicker. A raw ache instead outweighed the pleasure you tried to give yourself.
âDamn it,â you muttered.
You heard Buckyâs dark chuckle from the doorway and made the mistake of looking his way. You weren't sure how long he'd been standing there, but his cock was free from the confines of his pants and he lost his shirt at some point, too. He didn't attempt to hide the array of scars and tattoos that littered his torso. Ones you traced with your fingers and tongue more times than you could count. Back when you weren't a pawn in his game.
But if you really were a pawn, why did he have your name tattooed over his chest?
âLooks like you need a hand,â he said, brushing back his long hair as his eyes moved along your body from head to toe.
You ignored your racing heart as you said through your teeth, âGo away.â
He tore your life apart like a tornado, leaving destruction where there was once calm and beauty. Instead of letting you pick up the pieces, he continued to wreck everything around you. He broke you, too, but you were also the only thing he put back together.
The smirk he gave you was one you used to adore. âWhatâs wrong, princess? Still mad at me?â
You scoffed. Was he serious? âYes, Iâm fucking mad at you.â
âStill mad about the past? Or is it because you can't get out of your own head long enough to make yourself come?â He taunted, slowly stroking his thick cock. âDid you ever actually get yourself off before me? Or did you not know what an orgasm was until I gave you one?â
You watched with a lustful gaze as his hand moved up and down, your eyes not leaving the sight as you desperately tried to get some sort of relief. âI had plenty before you showed up,â you hissed, sliding a finger into your tight hole.
âYou know, all you have to do is admit that I'm right: That I've ruined you and all you can think about is how good it feels when I'm fucking you. Admit it and Iâll get you off.â
Pushing another finger inside yourself, you refused to admit that he was telling the truth. Nothing felt as good as he did. And that was the problem, wasn't it? You shouldn't want or need him. Not after everything he had done to your family.
He groaned as he watched your fingers sink in. âYou're so pathetic laying there. My pretty little slut wants to prove the impossible. Just wants to prove that she doesn't need me when we both know that's a fucking lie,â he grunted as his cock twitched, making you clench in want despite your anger at his words. âBetter hurry up and say it. Otherwise I'm going to come all over you and you're going to be left begging to come and not get off at all.â
You whined as a tear fell from your eye. âYou're an asshole. The lowest of the low.â
He chuckled as he brushed his thumb along the tip, watching as your eyes followed the motion. âNow you're just trying to hurt my feelings and that's mean, princess. That isn't you. I'm the mean one in this relationship.â
Your fingers froze as you narrowed your eyes. âRelationship? Don't you mean your prisoner?â
Your breath caught in your throat when he smirked, something darker than before. âYou think you're a prisoner? You have no fucking idea. Iâve been to prison. This is a fucking walk in the park,â he said, pouring more salt in the open wound when he added, âAnd your dad knows all about prison now, doesn't he?â
You choked on your next breath. âHow dare-â
âRelationship, prisoner, my girl. You're still fucking mine,â he snarled, the sound sending a shiver down your spine. âAnd I'm still right. So just say it. Tell me you need my cock and I'll get you off. Fuck that pretty pussy so good you cry for me. Won't even make you apologize for repeatedly calling me an asshole.â
âI wish I never met you,â you blurted out.
Guilt churned in your stomach at the hurt in his eyes. Why did you still care after what he did? Why did he matter to you? âYou don't mean that,â he whispered before he blinked, ice in his gaze. âYouâre just being a fucking brat.â
You let out a small scream of frustration when you removed your fingers and reached for your side drawer where you kept your vibrator. If Bucky was going to keep being an asshole who wouldn't get you off, your toy would. But he didn't let you get very far. Not when he was on you in a flash, throwing the toy far behind him and pinning your wrists above your head.
His breathing was almost as heavy as yours.
âOh no, princess. You're so confident you can come without me then that must mean you don't need any help at all coming,â he smirked, gripping your wrists tighter as you squirmed beneath him. You didn't dare look down when his cock brushed against your skin. âIt's cute that you think you're stronger than I am. That sexual frustration must really be fucking with your head. I can fix that.â
âYou're fucking sick. I don't⊠I⊠I don't need you,â you said, not having to see your eyes to know your pupils were blown with lust. Your tongue darted out to lick bottom lip before your gaze settled on his, challenging. âYou need me more than I need you. What was it you said? That I was the best pussy you ever had? And youâd be happy to keep your cock in me all day every day?â
âJust like my cock is the best you ever had.â
You opened your legs a bit more when he clenched his jaw. âAnd you don't want to finish on me. You want to be in me. If it were any other guy, he'd-â
He growled when he grabbed your chin. It was a reminder of just how strong he was and how he could hurt you if he wanted to. âThere are no other guys. Do you fucking hear me?â
It was your turn to smirk. Bucky was a lot of things, but he never strayed. Not once. He would forever be faithful. âYou sure about that? Maybe I can't relax right now, but if you won't fuck me Iâm sure I can find someone who-â
He flipped you on your stomach and gripped the back of your neck before you could finish that statement. âIf you think I wouldnât kill any guy who touches you, youâre out of your fucking mind. Keep pushing me, sweetheart. See what happens.â
You bit back a moan at the gravel in his voice as you turned your head to the side, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye. It was dangerous to poke the bear, but you were past the point of caring. Especially when fury looked beautiful on him. âWhat's wrong, Bucky? Don't like the taste of your own medicine?â
He leaned down, his breath harsh against your ear. âI prefer the taste of your pussy. Always so good for me. You wanna hear that I need you? Fine. I fucking need you,â he rasped, biting at your earlobe. âHappy?â
âAnd that youâre sorry?â
âFor hurting you? Yes,â he whispered, nosing along your neck. âNever meant to hurt you.â
You shuddered, almost delirious from needing to come. And the fact that he admitted that he needed you. That he was sorry for hurting you. But you weren't ready to play nice. âI'll be happier when you finally decide to fuck me, but you're just a fucking asshole, aren't you?â
He let out a slow breath. âYeah, I'm a fucking asshole.â He nipped your earlobe roughly again in retaliation before settling between your legs and teasingly brushing the tip of his cock along your folds. âAnd I'll fuck you when you say you need me, too.â
You tried to push back to take him in, but he kept a firm hold on your hips. You tried to wiggle out of it, but it only brought you frustration as you groaned. âIf you're really going to make me say it, don't hold your breath. You can't threaten me, Bucky. You're all talk. And guess what?â You said, smiling sweetly. âI can find another guy to fuck me better than you can.â
You couldnât see the thunderous look in his eyes, but you heard the low and menacing chuckle in his throat. It sent chills down your spine. Maybe you pushed too far this time, but you didnât care. He deserved it and worse.
âYou're trying to piss me off and I want you to remember that you pushed me to this,â he said more to himself than you before sheathing you in one hard thrust, your mouth falling open in a cry at his sudden intrusion. âHope you enjoy the bed since you won't even be able to walk out of this room.â
You stared at the wall, your eyes unseeing as Bucky tore you apart. Seconds passed. Minutes. Hours. The sound of his grunts from behind you filled your ears, along with the brutal slap of skin-on-skin. Your body burned, the overwhelming stretch from his cock making you lose sense of yourself. You told yourself heâd finish fucking you soon, but that felt like ages ago.
You also told yourself there was no way youâd have another orgasm, but he proved you wrong. Climax after climax, your release practically flooded around him. At this rate, you really wouldn't be able to get out of bed.
âBucky,â you gasped, trying to grip the sheets for purchase as he pulled out and slammed back into you. âPleaseâŠâ
You were boneless, exhausted, and he just kept going. âOh, no, princess. You wanted to get off.â
Tears of ecstasy streamed down your cheeks, whimpering when you felt yourself on the cusp of another orgasm. How was that possible? How many had he given you? âBucky, IâŠâ you moaned as you clenched around his cock again.
He cooed, a taunting sound when you choked on a sob. âSo good, but I want another.â
âI don't⊠â Your eyes rolled back, your head spinning. âI can't.â
Youâd seriously lost count at that point how many times youâd come. And your whimper didn't stop Bucky from mockingly cooing again. âAww, you don't think you can? My poor little fuck doll can still talk which means she hasn't had enough yet. This pussy is so fucking wet for me, so swollen,â he taunted, reaching underneath you and flicking your overstimulated clit as a choked moan escaped you, your walls tightening around him once again. âSee? Your greedy little cunt can't get enough of me.â
Why did your body need him so badly? âI can'tâŠâ you whined as he licked one of your tears away, seemingly unbothered by the sheen of sweat on your face.
âYou think anyone else can do this? Work your body up like this over and over again?â He grunted against your cheek. Your eyes squeezed shut at his harsh panting, his pace not slowing. âAll you had to do was say that you need me. But no. You just had to be a fucking brat.â
You practically wailed as you teetered on the edge of another orgasm. âI-I need you. Just you, Bucky,â you said. At least, you thought you said it. You had a tough time stringing any thoughts together with his cock splitting you open.
But his thrusts donât slow. They were just as relentless as before. âOh, no. You had your chance to say it,â he snarled, leaning up to pull your hips back against his. âAnd my pussy is telling me all I need to know. So just lay there and give me another.â
The pleasure bordered on the edge of pain as a sob escaped. There was no possible way you could come again. As much as you thought you couldnât take it, your body tensed. You still craved him and wanted to give him one more. So you did. You shattered. It was almost too easy that he managed to pull another orgasm from your pliable body.
Or maybe you were just easy for him.
Bucky smacked your ass hard enough to make you cry out, his hand kneading the flesh with a delighted groan. âFuck, each one is better than the last, princess. You want me to fill you up huh? You wanna feel me dripping from you?â He chuckled darkly, finally slowing down as you let out another sob. He shushed you before he put a hand on the back of your neck and kept you down. âIâm gonna fill you up and youâre gonna take it. Then, I'm gonna lick you clean until I'm satisfied.â
âNoâŠâ
He gave you one more smack for good measure when you made a sound of protest. âC'mon, princess. Beg for me to fill you up. If you can talk.â
You didnât know if you could. You were practically a drooling mess as he drove in as deep as he can go. âPl⊠Pl⊠BuâŠâ you tried to moan, another tear falling as he shushed you again.
âGot you cockdrunk, didn't I? Need to be pumped full? Then let me give you every. Fucking. Drop.â
A tired moan came out when he filled you up, giving a few slow thrusts as he finished. Your body trembled beneath him, a whiplash of chills and heat. You barely registered him pulling out before he flipped you onto your back. Glassy and unfocused eyes. Makeup smeared all your face. Tears stains on your cheeks. You mustâve looked quite the sight.
He relished in ruining you.
And the beautiful bastard didnât even look like he broke a sweat.
âShould I call you a dog? Youâre drooling, princess,â he smirked. You didnât have it in you to argue as his eyes drifted down to your pussy. It was still twitching and leaking with your mixed release. He licked his lips as he slid down your body more to fully take in the sight. âAnd you look good enough to eat, so I think that's just what I'll do.â
âWhatâŠâ you gasped. He couldn't. Not after all that.
You whimpered as you tried to push him away with a tired hand, but he grabbed your wrists with a tsk. âNo, no, no, sweetheart. You keep your hands to yourself. I told you I wasn't done with you and it's rude to keep a man from his meal.â
You were still floating from the multiple orgasms he gave you when he took his first lick. Your shivers picked up again and he groaned at your taste before diving in. Any strength you had to try to push him away depleted immediately, even with how sensitive your walls felt. You couldn't stop him.
Youâd never be able to stop him.
After a minute, your eyes widened when you felt him build you up again. âNo,â you moaned, but the sight of him between your legs, eating you like he was starving, was too much.
He just hummed against you. "Give. Me. One. More.â
Your back arched when his lips latched onto your clit, forcing the orgasm from your worn out body. You werenât sure if you made a sound, but you trembled as your release went on for what seemed like forever. Buckyâs tongue lapped it all up, humming before he sat back and looked at your wrecked form again. He made a show of licking the shine from his lips and looked just as proud as ruining you with his tongue the way he did with his cock.
âIf you ever try to threaten me with another man or refuse to admit you want me again, I'll make sure to tie you to this bed for a week and refuse to let you come even if you beg for it. And I shouldnât have to mention what else I can do. Do you understand?â
You trembled, knowing exactly what Bucky was capable of. While he never laid a hand on you to inflict pain, you knew the damage he did to others. Like the bodies buried and cold in the ground because of him. Not to mention the connections he still had at the prison. All he had to do was say the word and that would be the true end of your dad.
With unfocused and teary eyes, you gave him a nod. âYes, Sir,â you whispered.
âNow tell me you love me and that youâre sorry,â he ordered.
A tear slid from the corner of your eye. ââŠLove you. Iâm sorry.â
His smile was tender and for a second you forgot about everything else. âThatâs my good girl,â he praised, your heart betraying you like your body did when he kissed your lips. âAnd I love you, too.â
You whined as he left your line of sight, but he came back almost right away to sit beside you, the bed dipping under his weight. âDrink it, princess,â he urged, his voice gentler than before he helped you take a sip of water. He even smiled again when he wiped another tear of yours away. âWe can go back to the way it was before, you know. When you were blissfully unaware and we just quickly fell in love.â
The pain in your heart came and went as your breathing evened. You wished you could go back to innocent movie nights and meals. To waking up beside him with a smile on your face. To making love so passionate that you believed you were made for each other. There was no changing anything or going back. You could only move forward with him by your side.
Bucky sighed when you didn't say anything. âI know Iâm a piece of shit, but I won't stop loving you. And I think you learned your lesson.â
You blinked a little as you took another sip, on the verge of passing out.
âYouâre mine and Iâm never letting you go,â he whispered, brushing the gentlest of kisses against the top of your head. âDonât you ever fucking forget that.â
So... I know he isn't all good, but I had fun writing this and I hope you lovelies enjoyed it! Would love to hear your thoughts and maybe I'll expand on this? Love and thanks for reading! â€ïž
Masterlist â Bucky Barnes Masterlist â Ko-Fi
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hey i love your work so much and if itâs not to much go ask i was wondering if you could do a fic where fem!reader is part of the cast on obx and she is really close friends with drew where they are flirting and what not and everyone ships them and they are at an interview with the rest of the cast and that gets brought up? sorry if that doesnât make sense! if you donât have time itâs completely
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authors note thank you so much lovie!! i'm open to take requests and write them. i've thought of this concept before and all i gotta say is thank you for requesting this because I NEED THIS!! super sorry for not posting for a small while, there were stuff i needed to take care of first.
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summary having a close relationship with drew that send hints to fans they like each other based on the way they flirt with each other.
warning(s) flirting, shipping, co-stars secretly like each other?
Being apart of the Outer Banks cast has been such a blessing. You've created relationships with people you consider family now and who you can count on no matter what the circumstances are. Being on set for weeks on end filming scenes and making memories is what you look forward to most.
You grew closer with Drew Starkey because your characters are dating in the show and always next together on set too. Drew has become someone that you consider very important in your life.
You joined the Outer Banks cast during the second season. Drew appeared in a couple appearances near the end of the season, implying that he is interested in someoneâ love interest. You recall fans going nuts trying to figure out if this will continue. Fast forward two seasons, and your characters are together.
After a long day of filming, the cast decided to gather for dinner at a local beachside restaurant. The atmosphere was vibrant, with laughter and the sound of waves breaking on the shore. You and Drew were seated next to each other, much to the joy of your cast members, who were closely watching your interaction with Drew.
"Drew, look at the camera," you softly sang, your phone in your hand on the table, Drew in the frame of the videoâ he was speaking to Rudy across the table. He gives you a look that shows he knows you are heard before looking down at your phone and waving.
"Oh! "Hello there," he smiles even more when he sees himself on the screenâyou giggle at the end of the video before sharing it to your Instagram story.Â
"You posted it on your story?" he inquires, his body language focused solely on you. "I obviously had to; it was cute," you said as you placed your phone on the table next to your wallet. You suddenly felt nervous in front of Drew.
He raises his eyebrows in satisfaction. "Cute, huh?" He smirks and smiles, patting your thigh.
Fans began to ship you and Drew together as your relationship grew. The chemistry between you two is clearly obvious on and off screen, which is why you perform scenarios so well. Fans go berserk every time you post something on social media about Drew.
You two flirt without even realizing it at times. You will compliment each other as if you were a relationship, but this is nothing out of the norm for you two. Even your cast members have boarded the train and made a few comments about when you'll finish up together.Â
You can't lie, he's an attractive young man. There's no doubt about that.
Few hours after you posted on your story, fans have been discussing the video you shared in which Drew looks at you as if you are the most beautiful person on the planet and no one else is present.
Today, you and the cast will be doing interviews all day to promote Season four. For the first portion, everyone will sit in the same room as the interviewer, but thereafter everyone will be separated.
"Alright, everyone," said the interviewer, "we've got some fun questions from fans today, and they're dying to know more about the dynamic between some of our favorite cast members."
Everyone said "Oooo," anxious to see what else the interviewer would say.
"Let's start with a fan favorite," the interviewer added, her eyes sparkling mischievously. "There's been a lot of talk about the chemistry between you two." She pointed to Drew and you. "Care to share any insights on that?"
Your stomach dropped.
The question hung in the air, drawing a chorus of âOohsâ and playful nudges from the cast. You felt your cheeks heat up as you exchanged a glance with Drew. His blue eyes sparkled with amusement, a smirk playing on his lips
"Well," Drew said, leaning in slightly. "Y/N and I have always been close. We simply clicked, you know?"
"Really?" the interviewer asked, lifting an eyebrow. "Because the way you two flirt on and off set is pretty convincing."
You laughed and shook your head. "We simply have fun with it. Drew is a terrific person, and we like joking around. "It keeps things moving on set."
"From our first reading together, I knew she was going to be a great co star of mine and we've formed an amazing bond throughout the years" Drew says with his hands. In gratitude, you give him a pat on the back.
Your cast mates' eyes are constantly drawn to you and Drew since they can tell you have mutual feelings for each other. Granted, you two have scenes together all the time and have developed a strong bond. However, you consider being more than friends with him.
The interview continued on with more questions popping up that were exciting to answer. In the back of your mind you were thinking about the question about Drew and youâ do you want more?
Later that evening, you and Drew returned to your apartment and relaxed in your living room. The city lights outside your window gave a soft glow across the room, and the steady hum of the air conditioner broke the silence. You'd both changed into more comfortable clothes, eager to relax after a long day.
"Today was something, huh?" Drew murmured, breaking the silence as he sprawled down on your couch, seemingly at peace.
"Yeah, it was," you said, sitting next to him. "They really went all in on the whole shipping thing."
Drew chuckled, a deep, warm sound that made your heart race. "Yes, they did. "Makes you think, doesn't it?"
He sat up, his face instantly serious. "About Us. I mean, everybody sees it. Hell, we see it, don't we?
Your breath became locked in your throat. The playful flirtation, the lingering touches, the way your heart raced whenever he was closeâit all hinted at something more than friendship. However, hearing him say it aloud was another. It made it real.
"I suppose we do," you confessed gently.
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please, please, please | spencer reid x reader
wc: 2.8k, rating: explicit/18+
tags/warnings: office sex, professor!spencer/student!fem!reader, age gap (20 years?), rough sex, blowjobs, unprotected sex, vaginal sex, title kink (being called sir), questionable relationship, dubious consent (they both want it but again itâs teacher/student soâŠ)
a/n: read too many professor!spencer fics and decided i had to throw my hat in the ring. i feel crazy and i need him desperately. pls go crazy with me too. (ao3 link here!)
It doesnât take an FBI profiler to notice how Dr. Spencer Reid fails to hide the way he stares at you in his lectures, his eyes always lingering on you even when heâs addressing the entire classroom.Â
Maybe youâre just sensitive to his gaze, because heâs an extremely intelligent man whose attention youâre more than happy to have on you, given the fact that he is insanely attractive.
Maybe youâre just as attracted to him as he seems to be with you, because you absolutely preen at the attention Dr. Reid gives you in class, words of praise over your ideas often free-flowing from his lips.
Maybe because you know how hot you are, you shouldnât have come into Dr. Reidâs office in a low-cut top and a short plaid skirt asking to discuss your final essay in his Criminal Psychology class.Â
Both you and Dr. Reid know youâre more than capable of acing this paper, your in-class ideas clearly brilliant enough to impress Dr. Reid himself. And yet, youâre in his office, seemingly worried about how to get your thoughts across on paper.Â
It doesnât take an FBI profiler to notice how youâre positively bluffing, a little too eloquent to sound truly uncertain of yourself in your work for Dr. Reidâs class.
It doesnât take an FBI profiler to notice the way Dr. Reid is staring at your tits in your top, eyes only flicking back up to your face when he realises he should be looking at you while you speak instead of at your⊠assets.
âSir, did you catch what I just said?â You prod, very aware he most definitely did not hear you. You note how his eyes widen when you call him sir.Â
âUmâ Well, Iââ Dr. Reid starts, but itâs no use.Â
You stand up, putting your hands on the desk as you sigh, âDr. Reid, Iâm sorry if Iâm boring you with my thought process.â
Your arms frame your tits just right, and you catch the way Dr. Reidâs eyes inevitably flit down to your cleavage. Itâs so obvious when he looks back up at you, and you see his face redden. You quirk an eyebrow at him as a challenge of sorts, and he looks somewhat apologetic.Â
Dr. Reid clears his throat. He avoids your eyes for a moment, as he moves to take off his blazer. âI apologise. Iâm just⊠distracted at the moment.â
âI wonder why that is,â you hum, twirling a piece of your hair with your index finger, like youâre deep in thought. Then, like the already-obvious answer just hits you, you add, with a pout: âOh! Do I distract you, sir?âÂ
âWhat are you doing?â Dr. Reid asks, and you can hear the way heâs trying to keep his voice steady, calm.
âI donât know, sir,â you shrug. âMaybe you should share your thoughts with me.â
Dr. Reid blinks at you, takes the sight of you in. âWell, youâre giving me a hard time right about now.â
âWhy?â You cock your head to the side. He closes his eyes and breathes in deep, just for a moment.Â
Your professorâs tone biting, he answers candidly, âYour revealing clothing choice makes it difficult for me to focus. I didnât expect you to dress like a slut when you were coming into my office for a simple consultation.â
Your sharp inhale is audible in the pindrop-silent room. Dr. Reid meets your eyes. He pauses for a moment, and you watch his tongue dart out to wet his lips. His eyes are dark. With a flick of his finger, he says, âCome here.â
You think of leaning over the desk just to fuck with him even more, but Dr. Reid looks so serious you think you might be in actual trouble. You scurry over to his side of the desk, standing next to him. He turns his chair towards you, and you can see the bulge in your professorâs pants. Heâs big.
âYou want this?â Dr. Reid says gently. Itâs a loaded question.Â
Pulling your lower lip between your teeth, you nod. âYes, sir. I want you.â
âGood. Then get on your knees.â Itâs a command, in a deep voice youâve never heard from Dr. Reid in the past three months in his lectures. You hope your knees wonât bruise from the way you fall to them in a heartbeat.
âI didnât think you would be such a slut.â Dr. Reid smirks, and it makes a shiver run down your spine. His hand reaches towards you, cups your cheek. He slaps your cheek gently, but the suddenness makes you gasp. âFuck, you drive me crazy in class, but now I have you like this? I must have done something amazing in a past life to have you on your knees for me now.â
âSir,â you exhale shakily. His touch is soft, his thumb stroking your cheek with a surprising sweetness.Â
âLetâs put that mouth to good use, hmm?â Dr. Reid says, his tone warm, syrupy sweet. He reaches for his belt, the metal clink as he undoes it making heat quickly pool between your legs. The belt gets tossed aside and he unzips his fly, pulling his half-hard cock out. You watch as his large hand wraps around himself, as he strokes his cock absentmindedly. His eyes are only on you. Your body flushes hot with arousal.
Dr. Reid beckons you closer with a finger. You look up at him, and you take his cock in your hand. His eyes tell you everything you need to know. You lean forward to take him into your mouth. You wrap your lips around the head of his cock softly, the warmth of your mouth probably feeling like heaven as Dr. Reid moans quietly as you do. You swirl your tongue over his tip, tasting the saltiness of his precome.
His hand comes up to the back of your head as he watches you suck his cock. Youâre kitten-licking at his tip, which doesnât seem like enough for him. Dr. Reid pushes your head down on his cock, forcing you to take more of him into your mouth. Heâs big, so the sudden fullness of your mouth coupled with the way he hits the back of your throat makes you choke slightly. You glance up at him. Heâs smirking.Â
âIâm sure you know how to suck cock, donât you? Like this, sweetheart.â His tone is close to condescending, as the fist in your hair drags your head up and down on his cock. While itâs not like you donât know how to please a man, Dr. Reid treating you this way makes you swoon â his teacherly mannerisms turning you on impossibly.Â
You gag as Dr. Reid fucks your face down onto his cock, his groans mixing with your wet, choked noises. He clearly seems to enjoy this, using you how he pleases, uncaring of your own arousal. Itâs so hot you feel like you might explode. You hope youâll get more out of this than just sucking your professor off, because if he doesnât reciprocate you might have half a mind to report him for unprofessional conduct.
But Dr. Reid is moaning into his fist, eyebrows furrowed as you blow him, and youâve always wanted to please your professor; be it in class or right in this moment.
You reach up to grab Dr. Reid by his wrist, tapping his arm to get his attention. His eyelids flutter open, revealing his gorgeously deep brown eyes. He looks at you, slightly concerned. âWhatâs the matter?â
You swallow hard. âSir, Iâ Will you fuck me? Please? I want- I want to feel you inside.â
Dr. Reid closes his eyes for a moment, breathes through his nose. âHoly fucking shit,â He murmurs to himself, before he says, louder, âOkay. Yes. Fuck, youâre so sexy.â
You donât get up from your knees, not just yet. You look up at him, hands in your lap, waiting for him to tell you what to do. You smirk up at him. Dr. Reid sighs, rubbing his face with his hand, and says, âYou little minx. Get up on my desk.â
He extends a hand to help you up, your legs shaky from being on your knees. You look behind you to figure out how to get yourself onto the desk, but Dr. Reid is also on his feet now, and he hoists you up onto the desk, easily getting between your spread legs. You steady yourself by placing your hands out behind you, and shudder when Dr. Reidâs big, warm hands grab at your thighs. He squeezes at the flesh, before one hand comes down to your clothed pussy. He swipes his thumb over your clit, over your hole, and he tuts. âYouâre so wet already. You must be desperate.â
You shudder. Dr. Reidâs touch is not enough to feel good, as he barely teases you over your panties. âYou should do something about it, Professor.â
âI will,â he says. Dr. Reid exhales, looking down between where your bodies are pressed close, his hard cock pressed against your cunt. âLook at what youâve done to me. Youâve ruined me.â
âSir,â you say sultrily. âYou should fuck me now.â
âI will,â he repeats, his hand on your hip. He looks you up and down, and then Dr. Reidâs hand is sliding across your thigh, his fingers slipping up the hem of your skirt. You feel calloused thumbs teasing at the waistband of your panties, feel them dip past the elastic to pull them down.Â
Cool air hits your cunt, as Dr. Reid slides your panties off your legs. Heâs looking down at you, between your legs, clearly enjoying the view. You clear your throat, and he looks up at you, almost sheepish. He says, his voice cracking slightly, âYouâre gorgeous.â
You smile. âYouâre not so bad yourself, Dr. Reid.â
âYeah?â He laughs. âIâm glad you think so.â
As you talk, Dr. Reid has mindlessly started to rut his cock along your leaking cunt, your steadily-flowing slick making the slide easy. Itâs so good, even just the friction of your professor frotting against you. You hold back a moan, looking up into Dr. Reidâs eyes.
âSirâ Oh, fuck,â you moan, as his cock slips inside of you with the way he grinds against you, your hole letting him in too easily. Youâre so wet that heâd just slipped in. The feeling stuns you both, wet heat around Dr. Reidâs cock. Heâs still rocking his hips back and forth, which pulls him out of you and pushes him back in. The head of his cock pushes back into you, and you both moan. You cry, âMore, Dr. Reid.â
Dr. Reid steadies himself as he starts to fuck you, the movement of his hips shifting as he thrusts into you proper. Thereâs a practised ease in his thrusts, confident as he takes you on his desk. Your head falls forward, hair in your face, as your body takes in the feeling of your professorâs cock buried inside of you.
âYou feel so good,â Dr. Reid grunts, his cock fucking in and out of you. Heâs filling you up just the way you need it, his thickness stretching you out so deliciously. You clench around him at the praise, and his hips stutter. âSo tight for me, sweetheart.â
And then, you canât explain what you do next. You canât help yourself, as you wrap your arms around him and bury your face into his neck, smelling his musky perfume and sweat. You whimper. You feel so good you donât know what else to do with your body, but Dr. Reid doesnât push you away. One of his arms wraps around your waist, his hand on the small of your back feeling so warm through your thin top, even though youâre feeling so hot you could explode.Â
You feel yourself being pushed onto your back onto the heavy wooden desk, Dr. Reidâs weight pressing down on you. Like this, you feel his cock press inside of you impossibly deeper, and itâs so good you feel like screaming â you donât, obviously you canât, but you muffle a moan into his shoulder instead.
âSuch a good girl,â Dr. Reid murmurs softly, his cock punching deep inside of you. Each of his thrusts sends electric pleasure up your spine, through your nerves, and youâre tearing up from how good this feels. âFuck, I wish I could hear you scream for me.â
You whimper, a broken cry pressed against his neck. âDr. Reidââ
âOh, I know, sweetheart,â Dr. Reid coos softly. âYouâre doing so good, keeping it down for me. So good for me.â
You donât like feeling so pathetic, but Dr. Reid makes you feel safe even while youâre vulnerable, while heâs fucking you on his office desk. You sob, âDr. Reid, itâs too goodâ Iâm gonna cum, Iâ pleaseââ
âCome on,â he grunts, his voice laboured as he pants. âCum for me, my darling.â
Your gasp is louder than youâd like it to be, in a professorâs office of all places, but you feel too good to remember to keep it down. You shudder through your orgasm, unable to control the way your body reacts to all the pleasure given to you.Â
âFuck,â Dr. Reid blurts, his cock sliding out of you faster than you expect. You whine, but Dr. Reid is cumming all over your cunt, thick, hot spurts all over already-slick skin. âOh, shit. Fuck.â
Youâre thankful Dr. Reid didnât cum inside, only because he didnât have a condom on. You feel like a mess, but Dr. Reidâs looking at you like youâre a goddess. You feel his softening cock resting on your thigh. You want to go again, to feel him inside of you again, but perhaps thatâs too desperate.Â
When his head is clear, Dr. Reid is quick to step back, reaching into the desk drawer.Â
âSorry, let me justââ The commandeering, dominant Dr. Reid you just met is now gone, back to his slightly silly, bumbling self. He takes two wipes out from the packet of wet wipes he had pulled out from the drawer in his haste, but his hands are gentle when he wipes you clean. His touch is soft, sweet, and you feel so special in his hands. âIâm sorry I made a mess of you.â
You chuckle. âDr. Reid, Iâm more than okay with it. I think it comes with the territory.â
He smiles, albeit a little awkwardly. âYeah, youâre right. I just donât do this often, I suppose.â
âOh, please. As if you donât have other students throwing themselves at you too, Dr. Reid,â you laugh, waving him off.
âI do, but Iâve never done anything with them. Even if they try to proposition me, I tell them to leave my office. Iâve only⊠Itâs just you.â
Youâre stunned for a moment, blinking up at him. âYou⊠Seriously?â
He frowns slightly. âDoes it seem like I sleep around with my students often?â
âNo! No, I justâ I didnât expect that. I thought you would be more⊠experienced? Considering how readily you let me⊠seduce you. I guess.â
âYouâre definitely convincing,â Dr. Reid smiles. âBesides, I think youâre really special. Iâve never had a student like you.â
âOh,â you say, because what else can you say in this scenario? Should you say anything else? Itâs starting to hit you now, the implications of what youâve just done walking into your professorâs office like this. âThatâs⊠flattering.â
He tilts his head, brows furrowing. âYour pause seems to imply you donât really mean that.â
âOh, no, Dr. Reid, not at all, Iââ You shake your head. âIâm really flattered that you think Iâm special, I justâ Iâm not sure how I can navigate this. Weâve had sex, and itâs really hitting me now that I should not have seduced my professor because thatâs definitely a violation of conduct, andââ
âHey, relax,â Dr. Reid says, putting his hand on your shoulder. You breathe in deep. Dr. Reid looks at you warmly, and says, âI know we probably shouldnât have done this, but I couldnât resist you. And besides, itâs already done. Weâre close to the end of the semester anyways. If youâ Iâ If you want to continue this⊠outside of campus, Iâd be more than happy to.â
âDr. Reid,â you gasp, shocked that your professor would even be interested enough in you to suggest something like that. A relationship, outside of class? Or whatever it is he was thinking of. Frankly, even if Dr. Reid wants to meet once a month just to fuck, youâd take whatever you could get, especially with a man as gorgeous as him.
âCall me Spencer. Please,â he smiles. âOutside of class, at least.â
You grin. âOkay, Spencer.â
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