#i missed alot of the text sorry its fixed now!
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faithst · 1 year ago
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HOW ZB1 SOLVE ARGUMENTS
pairing zb1 x gn!reader
genre fluff, tiny tiny angst warnings mentions of food
notes hii anon~ thank you for requesting and i hope you enjoy this 💗
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masterlist<3
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— kim jiwoong
arguments rarely happen with him
he’s a goofy guy that treats you right 🙏
if an argument does happen, he makes sure to not escalate it
omg healthy relationship ftw !!!
he sits down with you, gently grabs your hands and lets you talk first
he won’t say a word or move an inch, he just listens to you talk while caressing your hand with his thumb
he nods while you talk to make sure you know that he’s listening 💗
“i’m so sorry, love. how do i make it up to you?”
— zhang hao
arguments w hao almost never happen
cause you can never take him seriously 😭
but in a case where it does happen; he needs time to think
maybe for a few days cause he’s trying to piece up the right words to say
he’ll ask the other members for advice
during this ‘thinking’ time, he’d still send you texts and funny pictures of himself as if nothing happened
because hao literally cannot go a day without talking to you in any form. so when fights happen; he texts you
eventually he pulls up to your house with his violin and starts knocking on your door 💥
“hey there my lovely partner!! i’m so sorry and i miss you alot. please do not say anything until i finish my song!”
— sung hanbin
another absolute sweetheart
hanbin is a really open minded person so arguments rarely happen
but if it does, he stops it right away before it can actually happen
both of you were a bit sensitive today, nothing was going like expected
this caused a small argument between you two
as the tension increased, hanbin almost raised his voice at you
but he stopped and realised what he was doing and immediately went up to hug you ☹️
“i hate this.. let’s not fight anymore.”
— seok matthew
he’s a bit stubborn when it comes to arguments
yeah, sure he’s salty but he won’t ever let the argument drag for days
after an argument, matt needs some time to recollect his thoughts
but if you ever think that he isn’t gonna make it up to you the same day; you’re wrong ❌
you were about to head to bed, obviously annoyed at him
and he’s like ‘no, stop. we don’t do that.’
“do what..?” you ask, really wanting to escape the tension by drifting to sleep
“we don’t go to bed angry with eachother. let’s sort this out, okay? i’m sorry..”
— kim taerae
he’s absolutely terrifying when it comes to arguments
no, he doesn’t raise his voice or says mean things
he’s quiet, too quiet
taerae needs time to think but it won’t take longer than 1-2 hours
after he recollects his thoughts and emotions, he comes searching for you
and he sees you on the floor beside the bed, hugging your knees
he sits down beside you and intertwines your fingers
there was a brief moment of silence before he speaks up
“i’m sorry, darling. let’s fix this okay?”
— shen ricky
contrary to popular belief he will buy his way out of the fight, he sticks little notes and gives you love letters instead !
you had a fight one day and ricky was thinking of a way to get you to talk to him 💭
so he placed sticky notes everywhere !
you arrived to your shared apartment and there was one on the table infront of the door that read ‘1) hey! welcome home’
there was another on the fridge as you walked into the kitchen ‘2) there’s strawberries in here!’
ontop of the strawberry box, there was another ‘3) i also made you some coffee!’
you closed the fridge, turned around and there was a cup of coffee with a sticky note plastered onto the cup ‘4) you should probably take a shower now, you’re stinky !!’
you walk into your shared bedroom and there was ricky, waiting for you as he handed you a letter that read;
‘5) i’m sorry for the other day.. will you forgive me?’
— kim gyuvin
if its a small argument, he might be extra salty towards you
however, if it’s a big argument; he needs time for himself to think
the ‘time’ he takes ranges from a few hours or sometimes even days
but he’s real clingy, so when he doesn’t get to cling to you; he folds easily 👋
after a few hours, he’s sitting across the room from you
doing literally anything to spark a reaction from you; a joke, a dumb remark, sending you pictures of eumppappa
eventually, he just sits next to you and hesitantly holds your hand
“i’m sorry.. can we not fight anymore?”
— park gunwook
arguments with him are never on serious topics
it’s mostly a debate; apple vs orange juice type thing 🍎🍊
and oh boy, does gunwook have alot of opinions
he starts bringing out logic and safe to say it becomes a bit annoying
so you’re both there, ignoring eachother
gunwook wants to be able to ignore you for days on end but he literally can’t
usually it’ll only take a few hours cause guilt consumes him easily
awkwardly shifts over to you and pokes your cheek 😞
“i’m sorry.. do you think you can forgive me..?”
— han yujin
stubborn 💯
will not be the one apologising
until his friends are tired hearing him complain about you so they just push him to apologise first
also won’t admit he misses talking to you
but he can’t take the loneliness anymore so he takes his chances when he sees you sitting alone
yujin sits next to you, making you quirk an eyebrow 🤨
“i thought you were ignoring me.” you say “i just thought you were lonely.” he responds
you let out a small laugh “uhuh, and?”
“and… actuallyi’mtheonethatsreallylonelyandi’mreallysorry!” he says with one singular breath, making you laugh “okay, yujin. i’m sorry too.”
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© keiwook | 2023
tag @bruhiamistake @trashydez @chxrrymxxnlight @haesunflower @big-uwu-stan @gnwookie @yjhcloud @kpoprhia @channiesprincess @blaycke @watamotee33 @hazyskyline @doobinnies @haechan-nahceah @chanlixed
here to join the taglist !
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fragileinthemaking · 6 hours ago
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hii, i hope youre doing well today and i was curious about some things about your ed (possible tw later?). I've been in your situation (somewhat, not to this extent) and am currently bul1mic with exercise as the form of purging/slowly healing idk. I wanted to know first of all how do you manage to burn more than 1k calories in a day because that is literally INSANE, I never thought that its possibls so I'm really really curious about your methods.
I also wanted to know your opinion on healing and the ed itself. Do you wish you never had one, do you hate counting c@ls, do you miss your life before the ed? Did it help you in any way (did you notice physical changes)? Are you experiencing any health problems because of it, are you dizzy or yellowish, have you ever fainted? Do you feel proud when skipping meals or anybody points out something ab the ed? Do you wish to heal but don't have the courage/will to, are you forced into healing, are you comfortable in the ed and want to continue and not start a healing process? How do you feel when you overeat or can't exercise the c@ls out? How do you feel about the future, do you wish to continue like so, do you wish to heal or neither of them?
I know it's A LOT of questions actually and I'm really sorry about it, I will explain now. When I was deep in my ed I never actually thought about it and what is going on with my life and I'm genuinely curious as to how it sounds and how my perspective was, I'm really trying not to offend you right now so please don't answer to anything if I'm offending you in any way!!
Hii I'm fine with any questions but damn that's alot (not in a negative way just alot of words and im bad at reading large groups of text)
First of all tw for ed stuff anyone that doesnt want to see this
with the burning 1k c4ls. my (almost) daily exercise typically burns around 500-700. secondly im a minor, im in school, pe is a legal requirement and that burns between 300-900 depending on what we do so combining those i can burn up to 1600 a day or if i do my normal stuff for twice as long that can also reach 1000 which i sometimes do on weekends when i have more time.
healing is something which if you want i highly encourage you get. i wish i had never gotten one, i wish i had never started counting c4ls, i wish i had spoken to someone before it got worse. i no longer feel like im able to get help and ive gotten myself to deep in the rabbit hole to get my mindset out so if you want help and its never to late then do it. get the help you need ill support you all the way.
i hate counting c4ls. i only eat in public when i have to and i always have to secretly look at the c4ls and hope nobody sees. ive written them on my hand afew times when theyre really random numbers and have been questioned about it so just had to lie to my friends which i hate doing. life before an ed fells like it would be so much more free and i would be more careless and do whatever i want without wondering how many c4ls in burning/gaining from that activity. if i could go back to when i started having an ed i absolutely would and change whatever i can to not end up like this.
the only physical symptom ive had is my stomach getting smaller but im waiting for the day my thighs / ass (idk what a more appropriate name would be) get smaller as they make me insecure. im not sure if its from having an ed but im almost always dizzy espescially when i stand up to fast. ive never fainted or been yellowed.
when i skip i dont feel proud more like im doing something correct and nobodys ever pointed out an ed but if they did i would deny it but secretly be proud someone noticed. i dont want to heal. i might have in the past but currently i have no plan to. i want to continue my ed without help. (my mindset is just 'if its a problem its your job to fix it' and i dont want to fix it). ive been put in counselling which has 6(i think) sessions left but if they think im really bad then i might be put in actual therapy. ive hinted about an ed with things like 'i often skip meals' and 'i just forget' or 'i dont have an appetite' and secretly hope they might catch on and get me help.
when i overeat or cant burn the c4ls i just feel sick and like im a failure. theres not really anything else i just feel bad and like i failed at having an ed. for the future my main goal is to reach my ugw and stay there getting lower if possible but not higher unless i really want help.
That was alot of questions but i feel like this is a place where i can talk about whatever(especially my ed) without anyone judging me or knowing who i am. im glad i could think about my ed on a deeper level other than just 'hmm weight be gone pls' so like thanks?? idk i hope i answered everything i might have missed a question. im always open to any question anyone has i just like talking to people and getting to know them.
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xoioel · 1 year ago
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➤ REWIND
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parings: Mina x Fem!Reader
genre: angst
warnings; break up
summary; a story based on the song 알고 싶지 않아 (REWIND)
note: this is my first ever story;) and i hope you enjoyed it. I might make this into a full story of you and Mina getting back together😻 I love my bias wrecker Mina😍😻😽
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I don't wanna know how you’re doing. When I look back, it was nothing at all
Looking back at all the fun times you had with Mina hurts. The days when the both of you would play Roblox and Minecraft for hours laughing and giggling over the littlest things now just are memories. It was about 6 months since you and Mina got together and the both of you were inseparable. Your duo was the most loved by the Once’s and everyone loved your relationship especially the other 8 members of TWICE.
I'm doing alright, just like what you said, The dream I've wished for has come true; I’m not curious about you
Today, Mina said that she needed a break from the relationship and it looked like she was happier away from you… It hurt alot but you knew you couldn’t destroy yourself over her. You tried over and over again to contact her but she only said that ‘You’ll be alright Y/n. its alright to be hurt about us but we need space’
I didn't know it would be this simple; Was our break up that easy for you? Now it's all in the past.
You didnt think the two of you would need to ever have a break since you both always talked everything out and you both were happy but to her it wasnt. She had broken up with you and she didn’t really care at all either even after all of the times you reached out to fix things she never responded and broke you so much.
My pretty figure when loved someone so much. I miss you so much
Once has noticed the change in your demeanor every time you went on v-live and someone asked about your relationship with Mina. They said it loon like you wanted to cry and tell them the truth but you knew you couldn’t. And it was all true.. You loved Mina so much and you would do anything for her but it obviously was the same for her.
I don't wanna know how you're doing; When I look back, it was nothing at all
Its been a weeks since the both of you broke up and your members found out you and Mina broke up but Mina wasnt there and they asked you what happened but you didn’t care for her anymore and you just told them that Mina fell out of love and now you could care less about her..
Im doing alright, just like what you said. The dream I've wished for has come true; I'm not curious about you
Its been a month since you’ve broke up and you finally feel a little bit better about yourself since you’ve broken up with Mina and now it was time for the READY TO BE’ World Tour |||| and you knew you would have to act like the 2 of you were in a relationship but you decided not, You did have to interact with her for your duo parts in MOONLIGHT SUNRISE and when Nayeon spun the wheel and your other duo parts in other songs.
Our relationship wasn’t as beautiful as the ones in the movies. It was just the kind of love everyone has. Or did I’ve changed so much? (Yеah)
Maybe your ready to speak to Mina again but you see that shes already texted you. She began to say how sorry she was and asking you in you could restart your friendship even if it doesn’t lead to us getting back together. But you don’t respond; You’re a completely different then you were 2 months ago, your not the girl who lets people back into her life even if they hurt you anymore but even then you look back and think ‘maybe i should give her 1 more chance’
Because of how you're likе that back then. I couldn’t help but to hate you, I endured it like that; You gave me everything
It was so hard to go from loving someone to hating them but that was the best thing to do so; just to save yourself and not fall into a depressing life. Even when you were in a relationship, she gave you everything. All of her attention, love and trust but you guessed it wasn’t enough. The days she wouldnt text you at all or even acknowledge your existence but you didnt realize it till it was too late and she left.
I don't wanna know how you're doing. When I look back, it was nothing at all
Now its been a few weeks since the READY TO BE’ World Tour happened and you were so much happier with being with ONCE but every time you saw a poster with Mi(N/N) it just hit you hard and You just smiled at them and not saying anything about Mina. But you knew that she didnt mean anything anymore since she left you so she obviously didnt care at all.
I'm doing alright, just like what you said. The dream I’ve wished for has come true; I'm not curious
It was encore and it was the Likey dance break and Momo said that you and Mina should do the dance break together and you wanted to break down and cry but Twice and Once began to chant you and Mina’s duo name so that made the both of you walk to the center of the stage and do the dance break. When the dance break finished she held your hand and you felt so happy that she wasn’t giving you the cold shoulder. And she whispered in your ear that shes sorry and she loves you soo much.
I don't wanna know. Ooh-ooh. I'm not curious. Yeah-yeah
You didnt even want to think about what Mina really said to you but when you all said your goodbyes and got off of the stage Mina grabbed your hand and brought the two of you into the bathroom. And she begged for your forgiveness but you couldn’t give it to her after she broke your heart. No yet of course..
I don't wanna know how you're doing. When I look back, it was nothing at all
Its been a few days since you last spoke to Mina and you finally responded to Minas numerous text messages that she was explaining that she was inna bad head space and she didn’t really mean to hurt you. But it was very hard to forgive her after she put you through hell. All the memories you both had were nothing to you.
I'm doing alright, just like what you said. The dream I've wished for has come true; I'm not curious
You went to Jihyo and talked to her about you and Minas problems and she told you that Mina was tell the truth. She also told you about how much Mina cried to her about how she treated you and that she couldnt even look at me without feeling shameful about what she has done. You would of never even though Mina even though that was because how how she looked on the outside. She always looked slightly upset anytime a interviewer asked about you and hows you think of the World Tour. Because she knew that you loved preforming infront of ONCE..
I don't wanna know how you're doing. When I look back, it was nothing at all
But you couldnt take her back this easily, Not when you cried to your therapist about how much she has hurt you and you didnt want to go back down that path. All of the memories you both made in her house, at your favorite stores and many other places just makes you sick. Just maybe. One day you will take Mina back…
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© xoioel — do not copy, translate, or share my work.
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is-the-primate-vid-cute · 2 years ago
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[video description: video is a tiktok by user @dukelmeurcenter. The video is filmed inside an indoor enclosure, featuring a female red ruff lemur eating from a large vine of grapes, with two very young offspring near her. The infants are looking around with their mouths open, mom is calmly eating her grapes, and touching the babies as they seem to try to bite her face. Text reads "Meet Hubble and Kitt, twin red ruffed lemurs! ruffed lemurs are very bitey, but mom, Ruby, is trying to teach them manners. These are Ruby's first infants, but she has done a great job taking care of them!" Upbeat tune plays in the background. End video description.]
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sunnysidevans · 4 years ago
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𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 - 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐓𝐰𝐨 | 𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐞 + 𝐅𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐊𝐢𝐬𝐬
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Summary: Everyone goes through stages in life, meeting new people, falling in love, getting married , having children. Some people think it won’t happen to them but maybe fate hadn’t lead you in the right direction. 
PREVIOUS STAGE  | STAGES MASTERLIST
Warnings: swearing? SUPER DUPER FLUFF , 
Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader
READERS POINT OF VIEW
A few weeks after the night in the bar along with the multiple lovely bouquets Chris sent you and multiple text conversations, you couldn’t wait to see what he had planned for your date. You sat at your desk, scrolling through pinterest for outfit inspirations as you had no plans, no idea what to wear or how to dress accordingly. “(Y/N!)” Casey yelled from his office, startling you and closing the tab quickly, and standing and fixing your skirt walking into his office, “yeah?!” you asked quickly with a smile on your face. “You know” he started, standing from his desk watching you from his 6”5 stance, “I admire your hard work, I do, but you seem distracted lately, I think you need to start, leaving things at home” he nodded buttoning his suit jacket as he walked around the desk “and I have more files I need you to do, so I would like you to start those and I do indeed to have you in the office on saturday” he nodded again, your face twisted, biting your lip you spoke up “but um, sir I have plans this weekend” you spoke looking up at him, you hated looking up to a him, he made you feel small, he shrugged walking to the door with his briefcase “I want them on my desk saturday morning (Y/L/N)”.
You flopped down on the couch, you had finally felt composed enough to talk to Chris, how could you tell this amazing sweet man that he planned something for it to fall through and ruined by your terrible boss. Your thoughts were interrupted with your ringtone breaking through your brain, after finally processing you picked the phone up quickly “Hello?” you asked, biting the skin around your nail, a nasty habit. “Hey!” Chris’s cheerful voice peaked through the speaker, making you smile, “Hey you!” you smiled sitting up, petting zeus behind the ears as you listened to chris rustle on the other side of the phone “you okay?” you asked, checking the time, seeing it was late,knowing it had to be late for him as he was working in Los Angeles for the week. “Yeah! Yeah uh” you could hear the nervousness in his voice, scratching the back of his neck like he did when you first met “I hate to do this” he started with a sigh “I have to stay in LA for a few more days.. So I won't be home in time for our date” you let out a sigh of relief as you heard the confusion in Chris's voice “(Y/N)?” he asked “oh! I’m sorry I am just kinda relieved and that sounds awful but my boss gave me a huge boatload of stuff I needed for him on saturday” you sighed softly as a sigh of relief through the speakers, “First, I’m so sorry your boss is a dick, and you should do your hardest but I know you will, and Two, that makes me feel alot better and less than a dick for having to bail” he said with a laugh “okay I hate to call and run but I just know its getting late” he smiled “go get some sleep okay?” you smiled biting your lip, “okay okay, you two, say goodnight to zeus for me” he laughed hanging up the phone after you two shared your goodbyes.
Sitting at your kitchen table, you looked over the files Casey had sent home with you, holding a cup of coffee in your nightgown, you had now clue why he gave you these files, did he know about your excitement for a date and planned to sabotage it? You sighed,starting to get a hold of yourself and starting on the files. A few hours had passed when your phone pinged with a notification, setting your phone down you looked down to see a text: “CHRIS: I hope your not working too hard beautiful, I just wanted you to know I was thinking about you, and that I am so sorry again about our date and that I am planning to make this date as good as it can be, ;)” you laughed, smiling at his use of emojis and the way he wanted to reach out and make sure you were doing okay, you smiled with reply: “(Y/N): oh! First stop apologizing for the date! I’m sure you are going to make it worth my while, also you reaching out gave me the small refuel I needed, I hope YOU aren't working to hard handsome, I hope to see you soon, oh and enjoy this <3” you smiled attaching a picture of zeus you had taken this morning, hoping it would brighten his terrible workday it seemed to be, you set your phone aside, smiling. You began to work on the files again for the few hours of daylight you had, thinking about how you couldn’t wait for this date. 
TWO WEEKS LATER
Saturday finally came around, after two weeks of not being able to have coordinating schedules, Saturday was finally it. Friday seemed to be a long drag of sitting behind a computer and looking at multiple files you needed to do, but decided to wait on. Sitting at your desk you sat and watched the time continue to tick,slowly. You hoped that the day would come to an end fast, you hadn’t been this excited for a date in a long time. Nina, the other mentee in the office walked up to your desk with a grin, looking up at you furrowed your eyebrows looking at her, “okay you need to spill” she laughed coming around your desk to sit beside you “uh what?” you asked with confusion in your voice, “you have not seemed this happy in a while, and you are so jittery you need to tell me what has you all jittery” she smiled, rubbing her hands together, you haven’t really told anyone about having a date, you did plan on not disclosing with who. “Oh, I have a date tomorrow” you smiled,trying to bite back the smile as she squealed “oh my god! That's what has you all jittery! Aww! I want to hear all about it okay?” she asked standing up from her chair as the clock finally struck five, you nodded in response as you quickly set your things aside and headed out the door for the weekend. As you were walking to your car your phone pinged with a text: “CHRIS: can’t wait for tomorrow <3”, with a smile you slid your phone in your purse, you couldn’t wait either. 
You stood in front of your floor length mirror in your bedroom, looking over your outfit as you debated if it was good, the clock had finally hit six and the sun had finally set. After adjusting the outfit you planned you were ready, as you finished the last swipe of lipstick a knock was heard at the door followed by Zeus. “Shush!” you laughed backing him away from the door, opening the door to Chris, holding another bouquet of flowers, you smiled looking up at him as he smiled, “hi” he smiled wider looking at you “oh come in!” you pulled the door open for him smiling moving aside “these are for you” he smiled holding the flowers to you with a smile, you took the flowers nodding quickly with a laugh “i thought they may be for zeus!” you laughed walking to the kitchen and putting them in water. Following Chris out to his car, arm and arm you asked “what are we doing?” you asked,looking up at him as he held the door open for you “hey, didn’t I say i wouldn’t let you down?” he asked as you climbed in laughing in response with a nod.
After about a twenty minute drive Chris came to a stop, with your eyes closed you felt the car jolt with the stop, with a laugh you spoke “can I open my eyes now?” you asked as he chuckled in response “yes” he smiled laughing, as you opened your eyes you saw the huge projector, a drive in. You smiled with a giggle as you looked over at him “a drive-in movie?” you asked as he nodded quickly “i thought it would be perfect!” he smiled “I could do something else if you don-” you cut him off quickly “no I love the idea of going to the drive in” you smiled “I feel like its grease” you smiled again looking over at him. You laughed sitting back as he pulled out a bag from the backseat, “now I did get a few snacks, but i did bring like sandwiches because they were the easiest to sneak in, I know it’s not much” he shrugged with a smile as you held your hand out “well bring it over” you laughed, opening the sandwich bag and taking a bite from the sandwich as the movie started. Sitting and watching the move for a few minutes till a familiar face popped up on the screen, “Oh my god!” you laughed looking between the screen and Chris “is- is that you?!” you asked looking between the movie and him smiling widely “wow” you sat back in the seat with smile as he shook his head “I really didn’t know they were playing this” he sighed, “makes my ego look huge as fuck huh?” he laughed “but yes that's indeed me” he laughed again smiling, you sat back in the seat, holding his hand in your lap, an excited smile on your face “Well now I’m excited” you looked at him,smiling.
You fell asleep halfway through the second movie, missing the second half of Mr & Mrs. Smith. You adjusted in the seat as you felt the blanket on you, waking up slowly you could hear the soft hum of Chris's radio as he drove and the soft hum he was humming. You opened your eyes slowly,looking up at him with a smile. “Hey you” he smiled driving down the road,watching you from his peripheral “hi” you whispered with a smile as he stopped at a light,turning to face you, smiling. You sat up  in the seat and watched the buildings pass by as Chris eventually turned down your street. You looked at him as he turned into your driveway, and on que zeus started to bark, you both chuckled as you turned to face him, “Thank you, I had fun, even though I fell asleep” you whispered,smiling at him “hey, I understand, I also had fun, you were a great date, even falling asleep” you laughed at his response, looking over his face you couldn’t help but your eyes dropping to his lips, he noticed it as he leaned closer, “is this okay?” he asked softly, his breath fanning your face as you leaned closer, connecting your lips. After pulling away you smiled at him, biting your lip you giggled grabbing your things looking at him “I’d like to do this again sometime” you smiled as he nodded “oh for sure” he nodded smiling “I’ll call you?” he asked, you nodded, shutting the car door behind you. As you made it into the house you couldn’t help but quickly shut the door and lean your back on it, letting out a sigh you smiled, the butterflies wouldn’t stop, you couldn’t help the continuous flutter in your stomach. Maybe he is special.
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TAGLIST: @onetwo3000​ | @memoriesat30 | @denise1605 | @angrybirdcr @hopefulbonkvoidland | @tessa-bl | @patzammit | @uniquebeautyqueen
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kpurereactions · 4 years ago
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ca you do a bts or nct version of the got7 (a member yells at you) imagine you did a while ago :) thank you
PT. 1
Your stomach was a never ending pit of nerves. All day circling the web were pictures of H/N smiling as he whispered in some girl you didn't recognized ear. You paced, constantly checking his location as you waited for him to get home. You had a plan, to ask him about the pictured rationally, and not jump to any conclusions until you had a chance to talk to him. It was the right thing to do, and for all you knew it was one of his make up artists and she was fixing something on his face. You knew not to believe the comments on line.  ‘We need to talk.’   
Your heart stopped at his text, and everything you did to try to get yourself to calm down and think rationally. He showed up guns a blazing, throwing his backpack on the ground and kicking off his shoes. Seeing the way he was reacting made your blood boil. He had no right to be the mad one in this situation. 
“What is your deal?” You asked as he completely ignored you to open your fridge. 
“My deal? Why, do you think your special enough to know everything that is going through my head?” He snapped back. 
“Um, no? I guess? But I definitely think Im special enough to get an answer to something as drastic as this?” You said with a sarcastic tone as you slid your phone with the picture on it across the counter at him. 
“God, you really are crazy, aren't you.” He started, his voice raising. “You know, maybe instead of obsessing over me, and trying to keep your relevance through me you should grow up and get a life of your own!”
He watched you with hateful eyes as tears started to well up. He knew the one thing you were the most insecure about was the perception that you were only with him for his fame. 
You turned and walked into your bedroom, locking the door behind you. What ever was going on in the photo didn't matter anymore. He went somewhere you never thought he would go, and the thought that he felt like you were only with him to stay ‘relevant’ broke your heart. 
Taeyong:
He must have left after his blow up because there was no attempt to come after you. You laid in your room crying for hours, and when the tears finally seemed to stop you left your room to a dark apartment. It wasn't hard to notice the things he brought with him were all gone, and he was no where to be found. You sat in your dark apartment not doing anything for a long time, not really sure what to do. Or where you stood with Taeyong. It wasn't until your phone lit up did your eyes leave the window you stared out of. It was him.  You contemplated not answering, but deciding to be the bigger person you answered and put the phone on speaker, but didn't say anything. 
“Y/n?” He said. His voice completely different from before. You didn't answer.  “Im sorry.” He started, you could imagine him hunched over picking at his nails as he spoke. You thought about biting back but chose against it, not wanting to cause anymore damage.  “That picture was a set up, if you will. My make up artist wanted a picture that made it look like we were in a relationship to show he friends but when her friends posted it it became a huge problem. I spent all day being yelled at for something I didn't realize was happening. I shouldn't have taken it out on you. 
You could hear the sadness in his voice, so you had to forgive him, but you made it very clear that you were not okay, and he would spend how ever long it took to make it up to you. 
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Kun:
He’d be quick to realize just how out of place he was and would quickly run after you, stopping to door before it could fully lock. He’d just grab you and hug you tightly. He wouldn't say anything, because he wouldn't know what to say, but you could tell by the way he hugged you he wanted to take back everything he said. He’d hold you until you eventually wrapped your arms around him too, and once you did a tear would roll down his cheek.  “I shouldn't have said that. I shouldn't have taken my bad day out on you.” He said, a sad smile on his lips as he tucked a stray hair or two of yours behind your ear. 
He’d tell you all about his day and how he got ripped for falling into a trap set for him by a stylist. He wouldn't ignore what it was he said either, and make it very clear that he didn't think at all that you were in anyway only with him because he was famous. 
By the time night rolled around the two of you had slumped into the bed and laid there giggling, as he got around to telling you about the good things that happened during his day. 
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Taeil:
Speaking to anyone like this was so out of character for him, and it shocked him just as much as it shocked you that he exploded like that. He’d stand there, staring at your door, not sure what to do, and he’d stand there, staring as he listened to your sobs, completely frozen. He’d eventually move to the couch, and sit there with his head in his hands, completely confused as to what it was he was going to do to make this situation better. 
When you finally came out, the sight of youre red face made him break down. You were shocked to see he was still there. You were also confused as to why he didnt try to talk to you in the hours past. He would just look at you with the saddest eyes and and when you sat next to him hed turn his head into your shoulder and whisper ‘im sorry’ as you stroked his hair. 
You wouldnt be able to bring up the photo again. Youd hear from other members about the situation and how the picture looked 100x worse than it actually was. Theyd also tell you that you werent the only one accusing him of something he would never do in a hundred years, and how he came to your place right after Johnny and Jaehyun ripped him for it looking like he was being unfaithful. 
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Johnny:
You would hear the front door slam right after you slammed your own door, and you wouldn't hear from him until the next day. You had spent alright feeling sick to your stomach, convinced now that your relationship was over. He had never yelled at you like that, so to be in this situation you feared the worse. The next day you laid on your couch, still softly crying at the thought of loosing him, and the last words he would have said to you. 
You got up only when there was a knock on your door. Lifelessly you walked to it and slowly open it. Only to turn around and walk away when you saw Johnny standing there looking just a rough as you probably did. You turned to walk away but the feeling of him quickly grabbing you from behind and holding you tight made you tense up. 
You honestly didnt know if you could forgive him, but as he held you tightly he spoke into your shoulder a sincere apology. You turned when he was finished to see he had started to cry and when you walked away slightly he let out a soft sob. 
“You cant treat me like that.” You said sternly, tears forming in your own eyes. You watched as he nodded and sighed before wrapping your blanket around him and accepting him as he wrapped you in his arms. The two of you stood like that for a while, and once he was finally ready to talk again he explained everything and how it was just one big misunderstanding. 
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Yuta:
He wouldnt take you storming off as an answer. He would be fully aware of his actions and he would act fast to fix it. He’d grab your hand before you could turn to close the door and pull you back out to the kitchen. He’d point at your phone and tell you quickly that this photo was a misunderstanding and the person who took it posted it with malicious intent. As soon as that was out his tone would soften. He would explain where he was coming from. How he had just got out of a five hour meeting where he had to convince people who didnt believe him the truth and then help identify the person who posted the photo. 
When that was done explaining that he acknowledge what he said. But by the time he had gotten to that you were already holding his hand and had already made up your mind to forgive him. Hed sigh, feeling bad now for ruining the evening, but things would get back to normal when you suggested food, and the two of you would be able to unwind on the couch
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Doyoung:
Doyoung would be in shock at your reaction, and then what he said would really settle in. Hed sit at your door, knocking and pleading for you to open the door. Hed send apologies your way through the door as he desperately tried to get you to open it. When you finally did, hed just look at you and when the tear you were trying to hold back finally broke hed sigh and wrap you in a hug. Hed tell you he didnt mean what he said. He’d apologize for taking his hard day out on you and ask you if you wanted to hear about the picture. 
The look on his face though had already confirmed that it was all a miss understanding, so when you shook your head he would nod and pull you into a soft, sweet kiss. Hed ask you if you forgave him and you would see the world lift off his shoulders when you nodded. Seeing how hard he fought to get you to understand was more than enough. 
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 I was going to do all 23 members but... its alot. So heres part one. 
Kitty
39 notes · View notes
baeklination · 4 years ago
Text
Ocean: the deep (2)
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Pic: comma.
Date: 210114
Warnings/Contains: angst, abuse (ment./emot.), gen.explicit language
Pairing: au! Baekhyun x F. Reader
WC: 7,9k
NOTE: It’s not all angst, but describing it as fluff feels off. On sensitive/explicit topics.
Prologue  Masterlist
                                    ¤¤
Alot of us tell ourselves “I’d know”, but chances are you wouldn’t. Not if they didn’t want you to. And if they did, showed you a sliver of the truth, would you be brave enough to see it instead of thinking up an excuse? 
                                     ¤¤
“Are you okay?”, Beanie asks, putting the break on her stroller so you can sit down on the park bench.
“Me? Yeah, I’m fine. A little tired. Still getting used to drinking wine instead of mixed drinks I guess.”
“No, not you. I mean you guys, you and Baekhyun.”
“What do you mean? You saw him last night.” Doubt finding its way to your mind - she has after all known him for longer than you. “Did...Did he say something to you?”
“No, but I noticed…”, she turns to you, stalling. “Don’t get mad, alright?”
“Why would I get mad?”
“Just… I’m gonna say something and I don’t want you to get mad at me.”
“Okay, I won’t get mad, Bean. What?”
“I’ve been married to Minnie for a while now, so I see Baekhyun alot, and I’ve heard some things - rumours I guess - that maybe, you know…”
“Don’t say it, Bean. Please don’t say it.” Heart sinking, you brace yourself and ask her.
“That he sleeps around..?”
“No, not that. More that he’s maybe...not so...kind.” 
“What..?”, you burst out.
“Like I said, it’s rumours, I never really hung out with his girlfriends before, so I wouldn’t know. But I…”
Beanie’s fidgeting makes your throat tighten.
“I feel like Baekhyun used to dote on you, but lately he’s been acting more like...your dad.”
“That’s ridiculous..!”, you say, swatting your hand in the air. “Besides, don’t dads dote on their kids, hm?” 
“But you’re not his daughter”, she says bluntly, fixing her eyes on you.
“Are you talking about something specific that happened last night?”
                                          ¤¤
  Hearing the lock turn you breathe a sigh of relief; having a dinner party at home without the owner of said home wasn’t your plan. Baekhyun stops in the living room to greet his guests and engage in the usual banter - as if he didn’t see half of them earlier in the day - before you hear his footsteps nearing the kitchen. 
“Sorry I’m late, sweetie. I just couldn’t seem to get out..!”, he huffs.
Putting on your best Suzy Homemaker air (jokingly, of course), you turn around with your arms open.
“You’re just in time, Baekhyun. Honestly, I just took the lasagna out of the oven.”
“Wow, this looks great…”, Baekhyun says, taking the sight of your carefully planned dishes in before kissing you. “But…Are you wearing that?”, he says leaning back, his eyes slightly narrowing.
“Hm? You picked this dress. Don’t you remember?”, you say puzzled.
“Of course I remember. But it’s...more for me, isn’t it? Just me. Maybe put on something more modest?”
“Modest..?”, you laugh. “This isn’t worse than any of the other girls...” 
“Well, you don’t have to be like them, do you? You’re my girl, aren’t you?”, he coos.
You know he’s being overly sensitive, but it won’t cost your ego much to change - not as much as this dinner ruined would, so you lift your hands up in defeat.
“Okay, you win”, you sigh.
His smile lights up not only his face, but your entire being. His hands on your cheeks is a promise of sweet touches to be given later on; his lips one of your name being whispered in love.
“I’ll set the table, sweetie.”
¤
“You changed your dress?”, Beanie asks.
“Serves me right for not wearing an apron”, you chuckle as you sit down.
Baekhyun takes your hand and smiles. 
“Please, everyone”, you gesture to the fully laden table “enjoy.”
                                        ¤¤
“No, I mean in general.”
“Well, in general, you’ve nothing to worry about. Sure, I don’t get flowers delivered every other day like before, but that’s because I practically live with him now. You know how it is”, you say, gesturing to her stroller. “The beginning is always a fairytale, and then it becomes something else. You don’t need all the trimmings when you realise you…”
“Love each other?”, Beanie says, leaning forward with big eyes.
“Yeah…”, you say, shrugging your shoulders.
“Baekhyun said the L word to you..!”
“A month ago. And every day since. God, why am I embarrassed to say it!? Stop laughing, Bean!”
“I’m sorry. This is great!”, Beanie replies, clapping her hands. “Now I feel bad for dragging him like that...”
“I won’t tell on you.” You sit quiet for a moment, then continue. “And when you say “dad”, if you mean how he sometimes suggests things for me to do, or wear, I dunno, it’s because I’ve asked him to. You know I’m not from around here, so sometimes when we go places, say for dinner, I want to know what cutlery to use, or what those goddamn french words mean, you know. It’s embarrassing - for me - to be so obviously misplaced…”
“Shit, don’t I know it…”, Beanie shakes her head. “What? You know I grew up on the other side. First time Minnie took me to a corporate event...he called it “a party”, so you know I rolled up in my shortest sequin number and my highest glitter heels… Shit, the looks I got!”, she wheezes.
“Those stiffs must’ve thought you were the entertainment!”
“Hey! But you’re right. I tell you, Minnie didn’t get any for a week.”
After wiping her tears Beanie gets serious again:
“I’m sorry, alright? Only looking out for you. But who knows...soon I might be looking for a maid of honour attire”, she smirks.
You cross your fingers and smile back.
                                         ¤¤
“I’ll be a happy man the day I don’t have to read the name Seung Inc. again”, Baekhyun sighs and slumps down on the couch, lifting your head to rest on his thigh.
“Settlement getting the better of you?”
“Their stupidity might”, he chuckles, giving you a kiss. “I’ll take Ga’ round the block before bed.”
“No, I can do it.”
“I could use some fresh air. And your overdramatic drama starts soon, doesn’t it?”
“It’s a perfectly lifelike show, Baekhyun. What, you mean your boss doesn’t slap you cross the face?”, you giggle, remembering his disbelief at the scene.
“No, but I might slap him one of these days. Come on Ga’”, he says, getting up and patting his thigh. “Gawa, come here.”
Gawa doesn’t move, so you nudge him off of the couch:
“Go!”
“Why do I always have to call that dog three times?”, Baekhyun shakes his head.
“What that dog thinks is anyone’s guess. He probably likes the way you say his name. Don’t forget-”
“Bags. I know.”
  Feeling a little antsy you busy yourself with a bit of tidying up in the kitchen, emptying the dishwasher, wiping the counters and the like. There’s really no need, as you’ve already done it, but it’s something to do while waiting for Baekhyun to come back, for him to go to bed. “Take it easy. It’s just a search, what’s gonna happen? Nothing. It’s not true, so nothing.” 
When he’s finally tucked in you bring in his water bottle - which he always forgets - and put it on the nightstand. 
“Thanks.”
“All set?”
“Beyond all set…”
“Mm, I can see you won’t need a bedtime story to fall asleep”, you say, running your fingers through his hair.
“Depends…”, he says, seemingly half asleep. “Depends on the story”, he smiles, guiding your hand downwards.
You pull it away. When he doesn’t even bother opening his eyes you know he wasn’t serious anyway, so you turn off the light and say goodnight, closing the door behind you.
                                     ¤¤ 
  Finishing your show you mute the TV and sit still for a while, making sure you can’t hear any sound except Gawa’s snoozing. “Let’s just do this.” You grab your computer and start reading. You’re relieved to find you can’t relate to most of the things you read, but once in a while the text makes you stop;
Patronizing; one month: 
Going through your phone Baekhyun had laughed when you suggested he wouldn’t like finding you going through his. “Go ahead. But I doubt you’d be able to discern anything.”
“What, ‘cus I’m not a corporate lawyer suddenly I’m dumb..?”
“No...But put it this way. Since I am a lawyer I know certain things. But you know things I don’t, sweetie. Like scanning barcodes, or working a cash register. That’s more your thing”, he had smiled. 
You had definitely felt some kind of way about the conversation. But seeing as he’d already said he wasn’t calling you dumb you didn’t find the words to approach it without it seeming like you were picking a fight.
“Joking”: Two months:
 “Baekhyun, I don’t think this is my size. Why’d you cut the label off?”
“It was huge. I knew you’d do it anyway. Maybe you’ve gained weight…”,  he said, chuckling at how the fabric cut into your waist.
You knew you hadn’t, and comparing it to your other trousers, the one he bought was definitely smaller.
Monitoring your whereabouts: three months:
Stacking condiments on the shelf at work you’d seen him coming down the aisle; a lovely surprise in the middle of a long shift. “Hi..! What are you doing here?”
“You weren’t answering your phone, just wanted to see you’re okay.”
“I don’t have it on me, you know that.”
“Okay, you got me. I was gonna pretend I wanted snacks, but really I missed you.”
You had found it adorable that he’d gotten into the car just to see you. But had he maybe done it to see if your text was true - if you were really covering a shift for a sick coworker? 
“Sweetie…”
Drunk with sleep you rub your eyes. Baekhyun is kneeling next to the couch, the white light from your laptop making him an angelic figure in the otherwise dark room.
“Oh”, you scrunch your face. “I must’ve fallen asleep…”
“You must have”, he says, brushing your hair behind your ear. “Who’s being abused?”
You jerk, suddenly fully awake, and look at your screen: “Signs to look out for”. You scramble to sit up and close the web browser.
“No, Beanie just-”
“Minnie’s abusing Beanie?”
“No. Someone in her mom circle...she thought maybe. I don’t know…” You know it’s impossible Baekhyun doesn’t hear the lie, but he doesn’t let on. “I just thought I’d see if there’s anything she could look...out for, you know. She’s busy with the baby and all...”, you shrug your shoulders, trying to brush it off as nothing special.
“If she’s that busy maybe she shouldn’t put her nose in other people’s business”, he says, cocking his head.
There’s an almost undetectable smile on his lips which sends a shiver through your body.
“It’s not like that, she-”
“Come to bed”, he says getting up on his feet.
“I... Come on, Gawa.”
“No, he stays. I don’t want him in the room.”
  There’s something distinctly different in how his shoulders look as he walks away. Something that makes you drag out your visit to the bathroom, hoping he’ll be asleep by the time you’re done. Tiptoeing into your room you breathe a sigh of relief, until you get into bed and he immediately rolls over to hug you. Any other day this would’ve been nothing less than what you expected - and wanted - but now all you can think of is how fast your heart is beating, and whether he can feel it or not. And Beanie…“What if he asks her? I can’t tell her to lie for me, then I’d have to explain why I did it in the first place…” But your thoughts are interrupted when Baekhyun exhales loudly into your neck and pulls your body closer, easing you out of your underwear.
                                         ¤¤
  Cutting the alarm at 08.15 you sit up to find the bed empty. Well, empty of Baekhyun. He’d let the door stay open for Gawa to jump into bed, as he is now halfheartedly wagging his tail, looking at you. The fact that he’s not already in your face, vying for your attention means Baekhyun has both walked and fed him. And that means he’s not angry with you about last night.
“Ay, ay”, you sigh getting out of bed, tying your robe tightly. “Maybe I should cut back even more on my hours like he wants. Whaddya say, Ga’? Staying home watching dramas all day, wouldn’t that be something?” 
 Shuffling out to the kitchen you see a note on the counter: “I’m meeting Seung Inc.redible ass for dinner. Home early, call me if you want take out.” Baekhyun always ends his notes with a star. Never a heart, or a smiley, but a star. Today it makes you pause, mulling last night over in your head. Not so much thinking as feeling. “Sweetie…” Nothing had happened, yet deep down you know something had. But since it is deep down you swat it away with ease, going about your day as planned. 
  Coming back to your apartment to find half of your plants either dead or hanging on to life by a thread was the twig that broke the back of your dubble home lifestyle. The surfaces being covered in dust and your clothes smelling stuffy was just icing on said broken back. 
“...and cleaning up feels like a waste since I’ll be gone and the same thing’s gonna happen..”, you complain over the phone to Baekhyun. 
“Sweetie..? Are you asking me if you can move in with me..?”, Baekhyun says at the other end. You can tell he has a smile on his face.
“Wha-no… I’m not”, you laugh, suddenly realising that’s exactly what it sounds like. “I was just venting.”
“So you don’t wanna move in with me?”
If you say yes it will really seem as if you were fishing, so you just stare at the phone. 
“You there…?”
“Yeah, I just… Are you really asking?”
“Yes…”
What you want to do is swing from your lamp like it’s a merry-go-round and scream, but you keep it cool, clearing your throat.
“Well, it’s a pretty big decision. Of course I’d say yes, but I have to confer with my associate.”
“This associate of yours, does it happen to be a big furry thing who is probably lying next to you, listening in..?”
“Maybe…”
“Mr. Gawa, I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse.”
“Baekhyun! I’ve seen that movie - it’s not a good offer..!”, you holler.
“Okay, okay”, he laughs. “My offer is love. Good enough?”
You scrunch your face and smother a yelp of delight.
“Good enough, Baekhyun…”
“Great”, he huffs. “Typical Seung, calling to rain on my happy moment… You’ll come home tonight then?”
“My first night as the lady of the manor, wouldn’t miss it. Go easy on him..! Love you.”
“Love you. Bye.”
  You sit in disbelief for a moment. Did an everyday phone call with Baekhyun just end in you moving in with him? A dozen unfinished thoughts goes through your mind; giving up the apartment seems daunting somehow; what do I do with all my stuff; does he have room for what I wanna bring..? But it is mostly happy thoughts painted in pink.
“Hope this puts an end to the tiffs we’ve had lately. Brings it back to how it was before”, you sigh. “Look alive, Gawa - you’re moving up in the world..!”, you say, wrestling with him for a bit.
                                           ¤¤ 
“Agh!”, you huff, kicking your shoes off in the hallway and dropping your bag on the floor.
Baekhyun, for once home earlier than you, gives you a curious look from the sofa.
“Rough day?”
“My car won’t start..!”
“How’d you get home?”
“It was fine, but when I turned the ignition off my headlights wouldn’t go out, so I was gonna do it again, but it wouldn’t start. I’ve been sitting in the parking lot for fifteen minutes revving the engine like Wacky Races..! I had to cut the battery ‘cus of the lights”, you complain, slumping down next to him with your head in his lap. “I was so angry I almost forgot Ga’ in the car. Ahh, that fucking car, Baekhyun..!”, you laugh desperately.
“You gonna leave it at the shop?”
“I can’t afford it right now. Not again.”
“Don’t be silly, I’ll pay for it.” 
“I don’t want you to. I’ll take the bus.”
“What’s a bus?”, Baekhyun frowns, choking a smile.
You roll your eyes at him and shake your head, as if you don’t think him playing with high class manners is funny. 
“Wait, I wanna lie down”, he says, stretching out on the couch with you as his blanket.
“I’ll give you money for the cab tomorrow”, he says, kissing your hand.
“There’s no cab. I’m taking the bus. But thank you.”
“Some start to being the lady of the manor… Speaking of which, did you give your… How many months is the notice...?”
“Three. No, I…”, you pause.
Baekhyun shakes his head a little, a question.
“I thought you might wanna talk it over.”
“We already did..? You having second thoughts?”
“Of course not..! It was just in case, since I was whining about it, maybe you asked...on the spur of the moment, kinda?”
His honeyed laughter rings in your ears.
“You think I’d ask you to move in on the spur of the moment?”
“Well, no...when you say it like that it sounds different..!”
“ Ah, what to do with you, sweetie”, he sighs. “You wanna have a party maybe?”
“A party?”
“Not a rave, but invite a few people, you know.”
“Hm...eh, I hadn’t...hm, okay.”
“We don’t have to.”
“No, I just hadn’t thought about it. It’ll be fun, let’s do it. Wait, I don’t even know - do you have a storage room in the building? If my stuff can fit there or whether I should rent something?”
“You’re bringing your things here, aren’t you?”
“I mean the big things, my furniture and…”
“You don’t need them anymore, just throw them out? Or are you planning on leaving me..?”, Baekhyun teases.
“Nooo. But I spent money on them, I don’t wanna just chuck ‘em out.”
“It’s stupid, but do as you wish”, he sighs.
“It’s not. Humour me. For a while at least.”
In these mundane things is where your heart is, feeling Baekhyun’s breathing and warmth through his thin t-shirt while he watches the news, lightly scratching the nape of your neck, but otherwise paying no particular attention to you. 
                                         ¤¤ 
  Even though you at first hadn’t a thought of having a moving-in party, the thought really grew on you, and you decided to throw something together. It was all rather ad-hoc: drinks, ramyun, games, a few shiny balloons you’d gotten from work and a dozen guests. Most of them were from Baekhyun’s office, but that didn’t matter, you knew and liked them well enough. Oddly enough, Beanie hadn’t gotten back to you today. You knew she was coming, she’d been too excited about the news not to, but you couldn’t get a hold of her now. You’d been checking your phone so often it was borderline rude, so you’d left it in the kitchen for some peace of mind, but now hearing your ringtone you excuse yourself and dash to get it. It’s not her.
“Hey, I forgot the code to the gate..?”
“Didn’t I send you a text with it?”
“Oh… I forgot that to..! Sorry, be right up.”
  Without being unappreciative of the friends that are here you can’t help missing the one who isn’t. You could probably drink and laugh away the night with anyone of these people, but with Beanie it’s different. You don’t know if it’s because both of you are from “the other side of the tracks” and somehow ended up in fancy places, but you do know your connection with her was instant, like meeting your twin from another lifetime. You know her word is her bond and that’s why her silence unnerves you.
“Problem?”
A little startled, you spin around to see Baekhyun.
“Nah, just Katy asking for the code.”
“Really..?”, he frowns. “You seem a bit…” 
“I thought it might be Bean…”, you shrug your shoulders. “Can you try Minnie, please?”
“He’s out of town on business”, Baekhyun replies casually.
“What?”
“He had to go, sweetie.”
“Had to go? Don’t you decide that?”
“What’s your point?”
“Well… Why didn’t you tell me?” 
Baekhyun cocks his head to the side. It makes your chest tighten.
“You want me to ask you how to do my job?”
“Of course not”, you say, deflated. “I’m just disappointed.”
“Well, you have guests in the other room. Maybe you should think more about them instead of sitting in here having a tantrum over someone who doesn’t even answer your calls. Shouldn’t you?”
You don’t want to let Baekhyun off the hook for not telling you about Min, but you know it wouldn’t make a difference if you continued. 
“I just don’t get why Beanie’s not picking up… What if something’s wrong?”
“She has a kid, she’s probably busy. And at this hour”, he says, looking at his watch “...she probably has her phone on mute. Come on now. I spent a lot of money on this, you don’t wanna ruin it for everyone, do you?”
Letting his words sink in, logic and guilt alike, you come to terms with the situation and realise that you really don’t want to ruin it for everyone, or yourself. You shake your head with a crooked smile.
“That’s my girl. No more pouting”, Baekhyun says, with a light poke on your nose. 
  Getting into bed you look through your phone one last time; check the call log and text messages, in case you’ve somehow clicked Beanie away, but there’s nothing there. Now, with not so little alcohol in your system you don’t worry about her being okay, but about your friendship. Had you done something wrong? Or rather, did she think you had; had she misunderstood something maybe? You try to put it out of your mind, but it sits like a little pebble in your gut, only given a break by Baekhyun.
“Thank god they’re gone..!”, he exclaims, dragging you on top of him. 
“You talked the most, drank the most-”
“I was trying to scare them away”, he laughs between kisses. “Every fucking time you moved on the couch I imagined it was me under there… Now be a good girl and ride me, sweetie.”
                                        ¤¤ 
As you hadn’t been able to get a hold of Beanie the following couple of days you had made up your mind to go to her and Minnie’s home - one of these days. Deciding to do something and having the courage to do it can be two very different things, and it fell on divine intervention to push you forward.
Waiting for Baekhyun to pick you up from the mall you spot Minnie walking across the parking lot.
“Min..!”, you shout, zig-zagging your way through the parked cars.
He smiles when he spots you, but you detect a degree of discomfort in it.
“Oh, hi. What are you doing here?”
“I’ve been to lunch with my mom, just waiting for Baekhyun to pick me up.”
“Lunch date with mom, that’s nice. I haven’t seen you in a while, how are you?”, he asks, as he starts for his car again.
“I’m good. You?”
“I’m good, just came back from out of town-”
“Yeah”, you interrupt. “That’s actually what I wanted to ask you about… Is Beanie alright? She didn’t come to my party and I can’t get a hold of her.”
“Yeah, she’s fine. You know how it is, busy with the baby and all… She probably just forgot.”
 Even with his face turned away as he’s putting his bags in the trunk you can tell he’s not being honest. You’re not sure if you want to know why though. You study his face as he rounds the car to the driver’s door - he’s clearly uncomfortable, trying to force a normal demeanour, so you press him on it.
“But I don’t think she’d forget about it. Or not get in touch on her own - we talk almost every day, Min.”
“Shit...”, he says, fidgeting with the keys. “I asked her not to go, okay. To keep a little distance for a while.”
“From me? Why? I thought we were-”
“No, it’s…”
They way he’s frowning and struggling with his words you know why.
“Baekhyun asked me to”, he finishes, holding his hands up in defeat.
“What, no. You must’ve misunderstood, Min”, you say, not wanting to let on what you’re really thinking. “Why would he?”
“He didn’t say, he just… Aeh, you know what? Maybe I did misunderstand him. Talk to him when you see him, it’s probably nothing”, he says, getting into the car.
“Yeah, I’ll tell him you ruined my party over nothing”, you chuckle. “Tell Bean to answer next time, alright?”
“Will do. See you around?”
“See ya”, you say, waving him off.
  You spend the few minutes you have left to wait wondering - fearing - why Baekhyun would ask such a thing of Minnie. Actually, you’re not wondering at all - you know why. But if that’s the case what does it mean? Why wouldn’t he sit down with you and have a conversation about it like an adult? Why would he essentially order Min to keep her away? He must know what it looks like… And what would Beanie think it looks like? What the hell are you gonna tell her when you see her again? “If you see her, you mean? I will see her.” You promise yourself you won’t let Baekhyun get away with this, that you’re gonna have a proper talk about it. But your resolve gets a nick as soon as you get in the car, for a moment pretending that it might just be a misunderstanding…
“How’s your mom?”
“You know, same old, same old.”
“Nothing new on the westfront..?”, he smiles at you and takes your hand.
“Not much. But I saw Min. Bumped into him, I mean. Just now.”
You can’t tell if you sound casual. When Baekhyun tightens his grip on your hand you definitely feel less than casual.
“Hm. Beanie?”
“No, it was just him. He-”
“So what’d he say?”, he asks, keeping his eyes on the road.
This is your in, but you’re not as brave as you were five minutes ago. If you bring it up you can’t unsay it and everything that follows will be your doing; do you want to spend a wonderful evening with your man or do you want to walk around on glass shards?
“Beanie thinks you don’t like her…”
He spares you a quick glance with a furrowed brow.
“He said that?”
“Not exactly. He said, eh, I don’t wanna be a tattle tale...”
“What are you, ten years old?”, he scoffs. “We can talk about it when we get home”, he continues and lets go of your hand. 
 It’s sickening, the darkness that emanates from him. Even shifting in your seat to look out the window you feel like a bother to him. You don’t want to “talk about it”, you want to shout at him for trying to decide who your friends are, and for cutting you off. But you also wanna sweep it under the rug, beg his forgiveness with your saddest eyes and let him know he’s more important than anyone else.
                                            ¤¤
  From the garage to the elevator to the hallway, every step feels like you're walking closer to springing a bear trap you set for yourself.
“You’re hovering...”, Baekhyun notes when you stand by the kitchen island, watching him scroll through his phone.
“Well, you said...we were gonna talk…”
“What’s there to talk about?”
You look at him, dumbfounded, until he puts away his phone and raises a questioning eyebrow.
“Minnie. Did you say anything to him about Beanie? I’m hoping it’s a misun-”
“That he should keep her away? Yeah.”
“Why would you do that? She’s my friend!”
“Don’t raise your voice at me.”
“Baekhyun…”
You try to find the right words as your eyes start burning, but end up throwing your hands up in defeat.
“She’s my friend…”
“Sweetie”, he says, coming up to you, looking down at you. “I’ve known her longer than you, I think I know what’s best.”
“I can take care of myself. Make my own decisions.”
“Sure you can. But I’m the one who moved you from a tiny apartment to a skyrise flat, no?”, he chuckles.
You know he sometimes has a tendency to poke fun at you, but this was different. Going from letting you know it doesn’t matter what your paycheck says to making sure you know it does - the audacity doesn’t make you angry, it hurts you.
“Why do you have to put me down? Like in the car, when you called me ten..”
“What am I supposed to do with you when you act like this then?” Pausing, seemingly drawing pleasure from your expression he continues in a softer tone, putting his arms around you “I was only kidding, you’re too sensitive, sweetie.”
“I guess I am...”, you whisper, knowing you can’t make him listen anyway. “I’m gonna take Ga’ out.”
   Giving Baekhyun the silent treatment doesn’t work. He sees through it, thinks it’s childish and wants no part of it. Besides, he’s better at it than you are; making some calls, working in his home office, reading the paper while seemingly not noticing your silent rebellion. After a while the TV and Gawa can’t keep your fearful thoughts away, the ones where he decides you’re no fun anymore. The clock is creeping closer to dinner time and that’ll be make or break as you see it - making up and eating together or eating alone and making a bad situation worse. You don’t want to give up even more of your pride, but his silence won’t stop any other way. “And besides, a relationship is about diplomacy. Sometimes you have to let the other person win.. It’s normal.”
 You walk past his study and the kitchen to find him lying in bed with his phone. Quiet as a mouse you sit down on your end, suddenly scared it won’t work, that he’ll brush away your attempt at reconciliation like so many bread crumbs from the mattress. “Do I beg?” A part of you is disgusted with yourself because you know he’s waiting for you to crawl back. He doesn’t look at you when you turn around to face him, but oh, he’s waiting alright. Shuffling up next to him you cautiously lower yourself down, hoping he’ll let you in. When he moves his arm for you to lay down, putting it around you when you have, the release you feel is immeasurable. Winning or losing isn’t so important. Baekhyun is. He runs his hand over your hair, eyes still fixed on the phone, you stretch your arm out, tucking your fingers beneath his shirt to feel his warm torso. That other stuff may be important, but not right now. 
                                            ¤¤
“Dear Diary in my head… Why didn’t I say anything? I’m not afraid of him, so why was I afraid to? I was lazy ‘cus I didn’t wanna go on with the fight. But I’m not a fucking school girl wanting a boy’s approval, so I should’ve insisted. Now it sounds pathetic, “I should’ve insisted I be allowed to see Beanie”, like he’s my dad - shit, that’s what Beanie said… I AM allowed to see her, goddamn it, and I will, I don’t care. He’s the one being unreasonable - as if I love every single one of his friends..! If that article is what he's mad about it doesn't even make sense, ‘cus he’s not like that. But what if he is...like that rumour she was talking about… Jesus CHRIST, I’d know if he was! Now I’m just winding myself up ‘cus I’m irritated, stop it. I know how he is; hot headed in the moment, but forgets about it quickly. I mean what, he’s gonna hate on his colleagues wife forever? Ah-ah, he’ll get over it. And I need to stop being such a pushover when we argue, that’s for damn sure…”
                                           ¤¤ 
“How many times have you seen her?”, Baekhyun asks coldly, holding up your phone.
You hadn’t, as you first thought, forgot to take it with you to the bedroom last night - he’d taken it before you woke up. There’s no room for you to come up with a lie, white or other. Actually, this time there’s not even room for your dread as you immediately get pissed off at him for taking it.
“I didn’t opt out of having a password for you to go through my phone”, you say sternly, going to retrieve it from him. When he moves you fix your eyes on him “Baekhyun..!”
“How many times?”
“A few times. She’s my friend, and I missed her. I know y-”
“A few times?”
There’s a glint in his eye that makes you unsettled so you make like you’re starting breakfast, with him following you.
“What do you talk about?”
“Nothing. This and that…”
“For example..?”
“I don’t keep a log, do I?”, you mumble sarcastically, more to yourself than him. 
Before you have time to react he's grabbed your arm, making your head bounce against the wall.
"What did you just say?", he spits in your face, but seeing how you cower, eyes locked on his hand hanging in the air, he remembers himself. "So fucking dumb", he hisses, releasing his grip on you with a shove to the side.
Toppling over, trying to compose yourself you see him snatching his blazer from his seat before leaving. 
  In an instant Baekhyun has made you so small you feel that the chairs, table and island are all towering up around you where you sit on the floor. Your eyes are fixed on the door, terrified you’re going to see the lock turn open. You won’t hear it through the piercing sound in your ears. “He was gonna hit me…” Understanding he’s not coming back you stand up, bracing yourself against the wall. What now? You look around aimlessly, not even realising you’re clutching your arm, until you see your phone on the counter. Like a bolt the obvious answer hits you: “You can’t stay.”  Hurrying to the closet you grab one of Baekhyun’s overnight bags - he won’t miss it - and open the drawers, grabbing a handful of everything and stuffing them in it; tearing clothes off their racks, making the hangers fall to the floor with a clank and sweep toiletries in  with one movement. Lacing up your shoes your heart threatens to break your chest in half. You repeatedly call Gawa, then remember your mom’s had him a few nights.
“Where’s my...” You look around for your jacket in a fever, unable to focus. 
“Did he take my jacket? My keys...no...”, you think even though you’re certain you never saw him with it.
“Ah!”
 Running to your room you breathe a sigh of relief when you see it hanging on a chair; putting it on you check your pockets to see everything’s there and *qo...*. You freeze. Was that the bolt sliding? Not hearing any other sounds you slide your phone open, ready to call whomever, leaving sweat marks over the screen, and inch your way out to the dining room. 
“Baekhyun..?”
 Your bag is right there. If he’s somehow managed to come in without you hearing it, he’s seen it, and with the open floor plan the only doors in the apartment are on the bathroom, office and walk-in closet - all situated round the entrance. You can’t lock yourself in. Your gut churns as you expect him to round the corner with his head to the side - the way it always is when he disapproves of something. Feeling like he’s toying with you, you give way to despondency, wiping your tears before you keep walking and turn the corner. But he’s not there. The door is locked. You sink down on wobbly legs, catching your breath. Grabbing your bag you hear that sound again, and realise it was just a glass bottle in the bag settling, knocking against another one. 
“Fuck! Jesus Christ…”
 Sitting down you start thinking about where to go. In the back of your head you’d assumed your mom’s place, but now you see there are only two ways that could go: you don’t tell her why, so she’ll invite Baekhyun in when he comes looking or you do tell her and she’ll insist you report him to the police. But what’s there to report? “He DIDN’T hit me. He grabbed your arm! Yeah, he grabbed my arm in a fight when he found out I’d been lying to him… They won’t do anything…”
“Why did I lie to him..! None of this would've happened if I’d been honest, just told him the first time I saw her. And if I hadn’t acted like that when he asked… Of course he'd be angry, anyone would. Being angry is one thing, punching someone is different. But he didn't… I mean, haven't I been so annoyed I've wanted to hit him? It's not the same thing! Why not? Because he happens to be stronger than me? It's still violence...You KNOW why it isn't… If he HAD, sure, I'd never let him near me again, but he didn’t. He wouldn’t… He wouldn’t.”
 Going back and forth with yourself in your head was just a formality and a way to convince yourself you're the type of person that 1: won't tolerate being treated like shit, and 2: would give someone a second chance. “Everyone deserves a second chance. At least a chance to explain themselves.” 
Putting your things back you make sure they are exactly as they had been, while ignoring the voice that asks why you’re worried he might be able to tell a difference. Now there’s nothing left to do but somehow pass the excruciatingly long hours until he gets off work...
                                        ¤¤
 Not hearing from Baekhyun all day had you go from thinking he’d been wrong to fearing he’d still think you were.
If you can forgive him then surely he can forgive you, right? If he’s still angry, you’ll make an effort; if he doesn't say anything about it, neither will you. You’ll go on as usual, have a visit with your mom, be fine. 
Standing in front of the mirror in your closet, trying to figure out what top to wear has a different feeling to it today; you're trying to cover up your arm. There isn't any bruising on it as far as you can tell, but you never know… When the lock turns your pulse goes up. You’ve been anxiety ridden all day, as well as longing for him to come home, so you can really put this thing past you and go back to normal. 
He peeks in through the door with a gentle smile and presents a bouquet - yellow peonies.
"I think roses are the official flower of apology, but I know how you love these."
“He’s not mad, thank God, he’s not mad…” 
"I don't know what came over me”, he starts, coming up to you. “It must be all the stress at work, with the buy-out and I… I would never hurt you! When I saw that look in your eyes I couldn’t believe what I was doing-”
“Why didn’t you call me all day?”, you ask, teary-eyed with relief.
“I wanted to, sweetie, but I...every time I picked up the phone I saw that look and I didn’t know what to say… I’ll never hurt you again, I swear.”
“You real...really scared me”, you manage to say through choppy breaths.
“I know. I’ll do whatever you want, give you anything you want”, he says, hugging you tightly “...just forgive me.”
You don’t take pleasure in seeing him distraught, but note that suddenly the roles are reversed - he’s the one pleading, and you have the power to lift him up.
“You have to promise me, Baekhyun.”
“I promise, sweetie. I promise..!”
He tips your head up by the chin:
“You believe me, right?"
With such sincerity in his eyes and tremble in his voice, how could you not?
“Good”, he says when you nod, giving you your long awaited kiss. “I’m so sorry…”
“Let’s...”, you exhale deeply, turning to the mirror again.“Let’s not talk about it anymore, okay?”
“Sure. What are you up to?”
“I'm just deciding what to wear. We have to be at my mum's in forty-five minutes, so if you're gonna shower before we go…”
Coming up to stand behind you in the mirror, the way he puts his hands on your shoulders makes you wince, if ever so slightly. But he doesn't notice. 
"Do you really think it's a good idea for us to go over there today? I think we could really need this time for ourselves. Don't you agree?"
"But I've already told her we're coming over…"
"I know, but with everything that's been going on… Tell you what...You go put these in water and I'll give her a call, tell her I've got a migraine."
"I have to get Gawa, she's had him four days already", you say, happy to have found a good reason for going over.
"She won't mind will she?", he asks, spinning you around to look you in the eyes. "Aren't I as important as him? I've really missed you today, sweetie."
You don't want to upset him again, and you've really missed him too. So you give in. 
Curled up on the sofa with your head on Baekhyun's chest, his fingers are playing with your hair.
"Sweetie? Have you thought about maybe letting your mum have Gawa?"
"Have him? Past tomorrow?"
"Keep him. For good, I mean."
"What? No, why?"
"Don't get upset", he says soothing you. "I don't mean he can't come over from time to time."
A sickening feeling creeps into your heart, but not wanting to risk another fight so soon you hold your tongue. Nonchalantly flipping through the channels on the TV he adds:
"We don't have to decide anything now. It's just...something to think about."
                                            ¤¤ 
  Drying your hands after finishing up the dishes at your mom's you hear Baekhyun from the living room:
"... to have him full time."
Your stomach's in knots as you join them. Baekhyun smiles and grabs your hand. 
"I was just telling your mom how we think she should keep Gawa - if you want to, of course", he adds thoughtfully, looking at your mom. 
"But he's your everything, honey", your mom, correctly, points out. "Why would you ev-"
She cuts herself off with eyes growing wide.
"Are you pregnant..!? Oh, oh..!", she blurts out before you can stop her.
"No!"
Baekhyun bursts out laughing, pulling you to sit on his lap.
"Not yet, mother. But who knows, might not be too long before you hear the tapping of little feet around here…", he jokes.
At least you hope he is. Not feeling entirely comfortable with the turn the conversation has taken, you get up, calling Gawa to you. 
"Well, I guess we should be going, mom. Come on, Baekhyun, Ga'."
There's a flicker in Baekhyun's eyes, but you know he won't make a scene in front of your mom.
"We'll give you some time to think about it", he says, hugging her goodbye. 
You can feel the cold emanating from him like dry ice in the elevator. 
"I'll drop you off at home before I head into the office", he says, clearing his throat. 
"It's Saturday, you're off."
"I might as well get some work done if you don't want to be with me. If you choose that animal over me."
                                         ¤¤
  Forty-eight hours ago you had been looking forward to the weekend; visiting your mom with your handsome, successful boyfriend and winding down with the love of your life - Gawa. But nothing had gone the way you had imagined. Even after the incident it was as if Baekhyun hadn't let go of your arm, keeping you under his eye and forcing you to prove your loyalty to him. But then again, you had just been through something big, however short it was. It was only natural he'd want a little more attention from you than normal, right? He probably didn't mean for you to give Gawa up for good, it was just bad wording. He loved seeing you happy, why else would he buy you flowers and jewellery, insist that you cut back your hours at work to be home more, call you every other hour to say hi? 
  Thinking about it in those terms made it simple - if not easy - for you to do what he wanted. Because he was what you wanted, wasn't he? So, not having told him you were returning Gawa to your mom the same day you were waiting for him to come back home. What had started as excitement about pleasing him had, as the hours passed, turned into a tremendously guilty conscience and now, lying in bed as he approaches, you can't even pretend to be happy.
"Why is it so dark in here?", he asks, throwing his blazer on the bed. "Where's Ga'? Gawa..!", he calls.
"He's not here", you answer him, your back still turned against him. "He's with mom…"
"Oh, sweetie", he sighs, laying down behind you, giving you a kiss on the neck. "I didn't mean for you to take him back today. Turn around, let me see that pretty face. That's better", he says, brushing the hair out of your eyes.
"My red eyes and runny nose is better?", you pout, partly fishing for a compliment. 
"Mm-hm. Of course I don't like to see you sad, but I really appreciate what you've done. It shows that you respect me. That you really care about me."
Little by little his words push away your melancholy. The way he's looking at you now, with his gentle brown eyes and sweet smile, prickles your skin. This is the reaction you had wanted from him.
"And besides…", he continues, slipping his hand under your t-shirt "I've been thinking about what your mother said… About a baby."
"No. Baekhyun, that's insane. That’s…"
"Why? Too soon? Who decides that? Look...", he says, nudging your t-shirt up to show your stomach "...can't you imagine a little Baekhyun growing in here? Or my daughter? Walking in the park with the stroller, showing the baby to everyone at work… I’d show you off to everyone the minute I found out."
“Aeh..”, you swat your hand as he gets up, but when he’s out of the room you scrunch your face with delight at the thought of it. Somehow you can see it. But in your stomach isn't just the butterflies of an imagined little life - it’s the whispered knowledge that you've left the right love behind.
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sero-sphere · 5 years ago
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Writing Prompt : Serial Killer Tomura Shigaraki
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listen so i know its been awhile. alot of things happened. i got a new job, my computer broke, my computer got fixed....bnha season 4 ended. Tiger King was a thing, and obviously quarantine.
also sorry this is what i decided to post first. youve all been warned!
Prompt: a serial killer who finds their victims through dating apps has finally chosen their next target. they've been texting for a while and had planned what would've been a fatal first date, but then the country went on lockdown. the killer keeps in touch figuring they might as well keep around another potential victim except...they’re kinda starting to like this one.
(Serial killer Tomura x f reader)
Warnings: murder, non-con everything? , mention of rape? idk its bad he kills people. maybe a little hybristophilia if you look real close.  (pls just remember none of this is real and proceed with caution....thnks)
1 week before quarantine:
It had only been three days since you re-downloaded tinder off of a whim. There had been some pretty interesting matches up until this point, but you were flip flopping between two guys mainly. One was tall with dark hair. He was covered in burns that only seemed to add to his allure. He was hot, figuratively and literally. The other was another kind of mystery all together. He had denied all your requests for any more pictures of himself. He obviously had the standard few shown in his bio, but those were mostly all body pics. It’s not like he was even that big, his muscles were no doubt toned as anything, but, like the first boy, he was littered in scars that intrigued you. The chemistry the two of you shared seemed stronger in your opinion than with the first. You were dying to see him in person, after all you had only been able to see so much during your facetime calls.
After some time, you finally narrowed it down. You decided to take a risk and go with what was behind door number 2. Tomura Shigaraki.
 1 day before quarantine:
After a few days of chatting, the two of you had teased each other so much you couldn’t stand it anymore. You were just dying for him to ask to see you in person. You and your friends had stopped going to the clubs recently, and you just hoped your now empty schedule would line up with his at some point this week. Everyone around you was getting sicker and sicker so the club was definitely a no go for now. Plus, with the way you looked, it might be a bit dangerous. Still, you hoped to play your cards just right, and finally get him to give in. You decided a little impromptu face time session was the next step. Removing your sweatshirt, leaving you in only a tank top, you grabbed your phone.
-----------------------------------------    ≧◠‿◠≦✌    -----------------------------------------
Halfway through the call you were starting to tune him out when you heard him snap at you. “What are you paying attention to? Those eyes should be on me.”
Bashfully, you turned back to your phone. “Sorry, I mean, have you seen the news? Not only do they talk about the virus 24/7, they also talk about those murders all the time.”
“Oh…yeah?” He hardened slightly at the unintended mention of him.
“Yeah, I mean if the virus doesn’t take me out…I’m pretty sure this guy might. All the victims look almost exactly like me.”
He really was a sucker for your innocence. “Oh, I guess he must have a type...”
“Yeah it’s quite interesting.” Your eyes flicked up to your screen, then back to the T.V
“Interesting?” Shigaraki was genuinely confused.
Returning your gaze to your phone, you finally answered him. “Yeah I think so, why you don’t?”
Interesting was the last thing people called him. Freak, psycho, yeah, but interesting? “I’m not sure…why, are you interested in him?”
“Well, you just said he has a type…I just wonder what it is about girls like me that make him go crazy….I bet you he has mommy issues!” You said with a giggle.
“Hah, mommy issues…”
“Either that or he’s got one of those weird brother sister relationships…maybe if I pretend he’d let me live.” You moaned slightly into the speaker. “Oh, oniichan~”
He coughed to stop himself from moaning. “Maybe it’s a bit of both.” Admittedly you did look like his mom and sister. More similar to which, was the real question.
“Oh, you think?… Who doesn’t have family issues these days….”
He was silent as you continued to theorize about him unknowingly.  He couldn’t stop himself from asking “What would you say to him, ya know? You said you look like his victims…haven’t you thought about if it was to happen to you?”
“Hmm….. I guess I’d ask him why?”
“Why what?”
“Why kill them? Like I wonder what happened in his life for him to be able to do something like that?”
“That’s what you would say? Not scream for help?” All of his past victims screamed, God he hated that. That’s why he ended up shoving his cock down their throats half the time. Anything to get them to shut up.
“If I’m going to die anyway why not take the opportunity to get to know him a little. Might sound morbid, but he doesn’t let people get away.”
“Seems like you know a lot about this guy?” He asked probingly.
“I’ve been curious, nothing really going on in the world other than this virus...”
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1 week into quarantine:
After that conversation Tomura became intrigued as to what you would think when you finally realized who he was. If you would really be brave enough to ask him ‘why’, right before he decided to take your life.  He was looking forward to the day you would finally agree to leave your house again. You were in the middle of a global pandemic after all. Until then, he had his ways of continuing his mission.
He started by hacking into the local hospital records. Truth be told he wasn’t ready to die, or be caught yet, so every week he would hack away for the names of the women who had recently been tested, and were found to be negative for the virus. He then sifted through their social media for girls that fit his profile. There weren’t too many, and he had to settle for a few that were a bit out of his age range.
A few weeks went by, the two of you keeping in touch every night. Tomura still finding suitable replacements until you were finally in his grasps. He didn’t want to give himself away by dragging you out, there were no excuses he could even think of at this point. It was better to wait, at least that’s what he kept telling himself.
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3 weeks into quarantine:
“Victim? Victim, honey you’re my fifth one….”
After the deed was done, and he was just about to head out of there, Shigarakis phone started to ring. He was going to ignore it at first until he saw it was you.  It was rather unusual for you to call this early. You both kept to a strictly late night schedule. Curiosity got the better of him.
“Hey…” He answered, huffing into the phone. He was ashamedly out of breath after everything that just transpired.
“Oh hey, I didn’t think you were going to answer.”
“Well. I did…so what’s up?”
“Why do you sound so out of breath? What were you jerking off…” You said teasingly.
“No, I was about to though…” He wasn’t lying, he usually goes home to finish himself. Maybe now was the chance to take a little risk.
“Wanna help me get there?” Yup, he was doing this.
“Yeah, of course I do.” You replied, unaware of what the person on the other end of the phone was really about to do.
 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3 weeks and 2 days into quarantine:
“Hey Tomu, you hear about what the killer left behind this time?” You all but nearly shouted, as soon as Shigaraki accepted your facetime call.
“Hmm, what was it?” If he had to take a guess, he bet he could figure out what it was.
“He came all over her face, he’s never done that before!…do you think he killed her before or after?”
“Probably before…” Probably? Yeah right, he knew for a fact he killed her before your little call to him.
“Yeah you’re probably right. They said this one was a bit older, I wonder if that helped him out more…ya’ know cause his supposed mommy issues.”
“Somehow I don’t think that’s the case…”
He couldn’t really tell you it was you, who indeed got him there. Staring at that body that somewhat resembled you, while you were saying all those things to him. He really couldn’t wait to have you. He usually wasn’t a man of patience, so he couldn’t figure out why he hasn’t actually killed you yet. He kept making up excuses but deep down, he knew he was growing quite fond of you. He couldn’t help that you were stroking his ego every time he did something riskier and you would comment on it.  
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4 weeks into quarantine:
 The last girl was different. They no longer felt right to him. He knew he had to have you. He wondered if he would miss you after it was done. Was he going to fuck you before or after? You weren’t going to be alive to theorize with him afterwards, that made him a little sad. He picked up his phone and shot you a text.
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softyoongiionly · 5 years ago
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Fear and Dumplings: Chapter Fourteen
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(GIF isn’t mine)
Confronting your fears for a final grade sounds unappealing but, with Yoongi as your partner, things might not be so bad.
Summary: You’re in your final semester at University when your Abnormal Psychology professor assigns you a partnered project surrounding your greatest fears. Lucky for you, your partner just so happens to be a cute boy named Min Yoongi.
Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader
Genre: Underground Rapper! Yoongi, Soft!!! Yoongi, Fluff!!!, some moderate angst (later), smut (later later), slow-ish? burn.
Word Count: 10.3k (lol, i wanna die) 
A/N: please scream along with me as I drown in a pile of emotion. I’m sorry the last three chapters have been so emotional, yoongi is a complicated boi and, needs roughly 25k to get out all of his feelings. ALSO, the next chapter will finally feature Jimin’s showcase, please send him love and good luck. Not like he needs it lmao
I LOVE YOU
Warnings for this Chapter: moderate angst, SMUT (oh my god its alot), mentions of anxiety and hardship, language, too many feelings.
Warnings for the Fic: mentions characters confronting their fears, characters in uncomfortable situations, emotional moments between characters, mentions of bad parenting, explicit language throughout the fic, moderate angst, and very explicit smut later in the story.
Chapter 14: Angels and Angels
“Jimin, if you move again, I’m going to shove this needle into your perfectly sculpted butt cheek…” You mutter, pinching Jimin’s ass, the sweat on your brow growing significantly.  
This causes a giggle to erupt from your best friend, who is currently contorting his body so that he can stare at himself in the mirror. 
“Yah! Do you miss your little boyfriend that much that you have to take your sexual frustration out on me?” Jimin wiggles his ass in your face and, you admonish him with a smack to his hip as you try your best to finish sewing his costume. 
Jimin called you that morning in a panic after he had ripped his showcase outfit during rehearsal so, you had quickly rushed over after your morning classes to resolve his crisis. 
“He’s not my boyfriend…” You counter, a smile threatening your mouth, “I do miss him though…” 
Jimin stalls his movements, allowing you to finish up, “You really like him don’t you?” 
The smile comes in full force but, thankfully Jimin is facing away from you when it does. 
“Maybe…” 
He rolls his eyes but, allows your vague response, turning slightly to examine your handy work, “You should invite him tomorrow, I still haven’t met him…” 
There is a flutter in your stomach at Jimin’s suggestion. You know that Jimin gets extra credit for the number of people that attend and, having Yoongi there would fill an extra seat. 
All the more reason to invite him… 
“I mean, it’s a big night for you Minnie, if you’re ok with him being there then, I’ll see if he’s free.” You attempt to keep your tone casual but, you’re slightly nervous at the thought of Yoongi being there as your date. 
Professor James cancelled Tuesday’s lecture due to illness and, Yoongi texted you Thursday morning that he wouldn’t be in class that day. Not seeing him for an entire week didn’t exactly sit well with you but, you were determined to not read too much into his absence.  
Jimin smirks, smoothing his hands over his hips, head tilting side to side in the mirror, “It’s my fourth showcase Y/N, it’s not that big of a deal…” 
A scoff leaves your lips, “Um??? It’s your senior showcase, you’re the reigning champion and, you’re about to make history as the only collegiate dancer to win the showcase four years in a row; of course it’s a big deal!” 
He giggles as you shove him playfully, a bit of nervousness creeping into his gaze, “You really think I’m going to win again?” 
 “Jimin,” You turn him towards you, holding each of his wrists in your hands, “I know you’re going to win again.” 
His beautiful smile graces his lips as he thrusts himself in your arms, the white sequins scratching against your skin. You hold him anyway though, you know he needs it. 
“Thank you…” He mumbles into your hair, “I don’t know what I’d do without you…” 
You smile into his neck, the warmth of Jimin’s words filling your heart, “Oh Jimin….I don’t know what you’d do either…” 
He pinches your side, “YAH! Don’t be mean! I would survive…maybe…” 
Squirming out of his hold, you giggle, patting his hip gently, “I don’t know what I’d do without you either Park Fairy. I’d probably die…” 
He points at you,” Exactly, don’t be a brat…” His tone his firm but, the smile on his lips is hard to miss. Jimin turns his attention back towards his full length mirror again to examine his costume. 
It’s a beautiful piece, skintight, covered in white sequins and, thin pearlescent lycra that hug Jimin’s body perfectly. You wondered if this was his entire costume as Jimin was known for quite an elaborate set up. 
“I love this costume by the way, it’s beautiful,” You marvel, putting all of your sewing tools back in their box, “Is the theme still a surprise or can you end my suffering and tell me?” 
Jimin smirks, eyes carefully scanning over his backside,” It’s still a surprise, my leotard is only the base piece, I have a lot more in store…” 
“RIP my mascara…” You lament, snapping your sewing kit shut before grabbing your phone off of the coffee table, “Should I text him now?” 
He giggles, amusement coloring his face as he turns to you, “Why do you look so nervous?” 
“I’m not nervous.” You grumble, thumbs tapping away at your screen to get to your message thread with the dreamiest rapper on Earth aka Min Yoongi.  
The last message that you sent him was wishing him luck on the rest of his composition, which he has been working tirelessly at for the last half of the semester. He only responded with a thumbs up emoji and, that was yesterday at 7:49pm.  
Suddenly, as your fingers hover over the keys, you feel slightly insecure at the lack of communication between the two of you. Last weekend had been amazing and, Yoongi made sure that you arrived back at your apartment safely and during the week he had said something to the effect of ‘I miss you’ without actually saying it.  
Jimin notices your hesitation, “What’s wrong?” 
Your teeth find purchase on your lip but, you avoid his gaze and focus in on your phone. 
“Nothing…I just_” A sigh leaves your lips as you tap the screen to keep it from going black, “ I don’t know… Yoongi and I had a really good time last weekend and, I’m used to not really hearing from him but, I kind of thought after everything that happened between us, there would be a little more communication. I don’t expect him to text me all day or anything but, we both agreed that we liked each other….a lot so, I thought he’d…” 
“Act like a boyfriend?” Jimin offers, a bit of his playfulness diminishing, focusing in on your emotions. 
The word sends butterflies through your stomach but, you shove them out, trying not to drown in your emotions. 
“No…I mean yeah but, like we aren’t together yet so, I can’t expect him to…I don’t know…” Articulating your emotions is not always your strong suit and, for whatever reason, you seem to become especially impaired when Yoongi is involved. 
“Jagi…” Jimin begins, sitting beside you, the sequins scratching your skin as he wraps an arm around your shoulders. “…you’re allowed to want his attention regardless of whether or not you both have a title. Titles are nice but, the feelings are much more important…” 
You deflate a little bit, leaning into Jimin, your teeth still working against your lip, “I really like him…like I want to wake up next to him and, make him breakfast and do cute shit with him and, I’m not used to feeling like this and, I want to crawl into a hole and, never come out…” 
Your pink fairy giggles, pressing a kiss to your head “Yah, you’re not allowed to crawl into a hole, my showcase is tomorrow…” 
“Can I do it after your showcase?” You mutter against his leotard, your thumb tapping your screen again to ensure that it doesn’t go black.  
Jimin scoffs, “I literally just told you that I can’t live without you, do you want me to die?”  
His brows are raised in playful accusation and, you try your best not to get to distracted by how adorable he is. 
“No...” You grumble, lips fixed in a firm pout 
He chuckles now, nudging your hand towards your phone, “Okay then, text him.” 
With a roll of your eyes, you unlock your phone for the third time and, begin typing your message. 
You: Hey, I’m not sure what you’re up to tomorrow, I know you’ve been working on your composition but, my best friend is performing in a dance showcase in the main theater. Do you want to come? I figured we could carpool and, maybe get dinner afterwards or something? Let me know when you get a chance! 
By the end of your message, you feel your heart doing somersaults beneath your sternum. Why the hell were you so nervous? Shouldn’t you be passed this by now? 
“See? I knew you could do it...” Jimin cheers, kissing your head once more before moving to carefully take off his costume. 
“Yes, now I just have to endure a slow painful death while waiting for him to respond...”  A sickly sweet smile is on your mouth which causes Jimin to throw his head back in laughter. 
“Aren’t I supposed to be the dramatic one in this friendship?” 
“No Jimin, you’re the beautiful and talented main character and, I...”You gesture to your chest, “...am your socially inept, quirky side kick...” 
This earns another boisterous round of laughter from your best friend who is currently checking out his nearly naked body in the mirror.  
“Okay, first of all, thank you for calling me beautiful. Second of all, you’re can’t possibly be the sidekick...” 
Your eyes narrow, “Why not?” 
Jimin whips around in your direction, bubblegum hair a disheveled mess ontop of his head, a brilliant smile on his pretty lips, 
“Because you’re my hero...” 
With a mouth parted in shock, you process just how ridiculous your best friend is. At your expression,  
Jimin rushed into another fit of laughter as you respond. 
“Alexa, play Hate That I Love You by Rihanna...” 
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After Jimin leaves, you wait approximately 5 hours before getting a response from Yoongi. The response does nothing to aid in soothing your nerves:
Yoongi: Hey sorry it took me so long to respond. I’ve been working, I think I may be able to go but, I was wondering what you were doing right now. I’m having some trouble sorting through something, I know it’s late though, so I understand if you’re sleeping.
Your brow furrows. His message seems odd but, you don’t want to pass up an opportunity to see him. Plus, you definitely wouldn’t be able to sleep knowing that he’s having an issue.
You: I can come by, what’s the address? Are you ok?
5 more minutes pass before another message comes in,
Yoongi: I just want to hang out, this week has been kind of rough.
Yoongi: 8294 Han Road. I’m in the 4th studio space. Just ring the front and, tell them you’re here for me, they should let you through. Sorry it’s so late.
You frown at his admission, wanting nothing more than to be with him now that you know your suspicion is correct.
You: Don’t be sorry, I’ll be there as soon as I can.
His message comes through within seconds and, you can’t help but feel a little nervous at seeing him in his studio. There’s also this feeling; a feeling that indicates that something is wrong. Yoongi has never asked you to come see him and, that paired with his odd behavior this past week has your stomach in knots.
What if he didn’t want to see you anymore?
You both agreed that you liked eachother but, life was busy for the both of you. The conversation on the Ferris wheel inches its way back to the forefront of your mind. Yoongi said that you two getting together would be a bad idea, was he returning to that conclusion?
 He never explained why he felt that way in the first place.
The Uber ride to Yoongi’s studio costs you $9.78. You didn’t realize how close he was to your apartment and, as the car pulls up to the faded brick building, you feel your heartbeat grow to an alarming level.
“Thank you, have a good night…”
“No problem, have a good one.”
The exchange with the driver is short and, given that he didn’t talk to you the entire car ride, you decide to rate him 5 stars.
 As you approach the front entrance, you notice the soft blue neon sign hanging off of the door that reads: SoundCrowd.
Clever.
You’re definitely in the right place.
The door swings open effortlessly and, you’re met with an empty lobby. Tables, chairs and, various flyers containing the studios information are the only things that greet you when you walk in. The clear glass that separates the lobby from the reception desk make the whole place feel like some sort of medical clinic; it’s not exactly a beacon of creative energy. You hope Yoongi’s studio space was less clinical.
“Can I help you?” A deep but, friendly voice calls from behind the glass.
The receptionist is an older guy, maybe in his mid-30s, wearing what looks to be a ghost busters pajama set.
“Yeah, I was looking for Yoongi? He said he was in the 4th studio space…”
The man smirks knowingly, “You’re here for Min huh? Tell you what, I’ll let you through but, you have to promise me you’ll try to get him to go home. The dude’s been here for like four days straight…”
Your brow furrows, “Four days? Are you serious, he hasn’t gone home or anything?”
The man clicks his tongue, “I live upstairs, and his car’s been here since Monday. He used my shower about an hour ago but, other than that, I don’t even think he’s left the room…”
A sigh leaves your lips at the information, “Jesus.”
“Are you his girlfriend?”
The word makes your heart go fuzzy and, your first instinct is to say yes but, the last thing you need is for Yoongi to find out that you made your relationship official without him.   
“Uh no, we’re just_” You trail off, searching for the right word, “we’re dating but, he’s been a friend of mine for quite a while…”
He smirks, waving you over to him, “No need to explain, I’m just happy Min is getting some sort of human interaction. He’s been a god tier introvert ever since I’ve known him. I’m Sejin by the way…”
A hand is extended through the opening in the glass and, you accept it graciously, bowing your head.
“Y/N,” You smile, “it’s really good to meet you. How long have you guys known each other?”
Sejin squints his eyes for a moment, tilting his head in thought, “Oh geez uh, let’s see, Yoongi’s 25 this year…uh…ten years maybe?”
Your brows go up, “Oh wow, are you from Daegu too?”
At your seemingly normal question, Sejin grows visibly uncomfortable, as if a realization just crossed his brain. You fear you may be asking too many questions but before you can amend, Sejin speaks up again.
“Uh, Yoongi’s never mentioned me has he?”
“No, he hasn’t, I’m sorry…” You smile looking towards the buzzer near Seijin’s hand, wishing you would have just asked him to buzz you in.
“Oh don’t be sorry at all,” A soft smile is sent your way as he sees that you may have gotten the wrong impression. Sejin nods toward the door, “Yoongi lived with me for a while when he first came to the city, I’m a friend of his older brother. I’m sure he’ll tell you more about it if you ask; Here let me buzz you in, he’ll be straight down the hall to your right.”
Confusion swirls in the forefront of your mind but, you smile nonetheless, turning towards the door, “Thank you so much, it was nice meeting you.”
He bows his head, offering a small smile, “Nice meeting you too.”
There are rooms lining either side of the long hallway, some of which emit a low hum of music through their barriers.  Yoongi certainly isn’t the only night owl plugging away in the building.
Turning right at the end of the hall, you’re met with a black door boasting a sign that read “#4.” The irregular heartbeat is back as you raise your hand to knock at the door but, your desire to finally see Yoongi after nearly a week overruns the nervousness that you feel.
“Come in.” You hear his voice through the door and, quickly, you turn the knob and, let yourself in.
You’re met with a confusing sight. 
The studio space was dimly lit with a low hanging turquoise fixture that sends a calming wave of light throughout the small room. The walls contain various speakers and, electrical equipment and, along with a work desk, you notice a giant monitor, nearly the size of a flat screen and, every production tool that any musician could ever dream of. However, there was also several indicators that Sejin was right about Yoongi never leaving this room. There’s a black pull out couch on the right side of the room that looks like he hasn’t been slept in, a few pieces of Yoongi’s clothes scattered on the floor and, perhaps the most disturbing thing is the overflowing trashcan in the far corner of the room containing nothing but empty coffee cups. From what you can tell, there isn't a single take out box so, that either means that Yoongi has been taking his food trash out or, that he hasn’t been eating at all.
And then there’s Yoongi, who’s just turned to look at whoever just came through his door. He’s sitting in the black desk chair,  dressed in a pair of torn up black jeans and a grey hoodie, his formerly platinum hair is a faded brown now and damp from his shower. He musters a small smile for you, his normally cat like eyes are sunken in, clearly from a lack of sleep and, his lips are chapped, another indicator that he hasn’t been taking care of himself.
“Hey you…” You smile, setting your purse down by the door, trying to gauge what’s going through his mind.
“Hi…um thank you for coming…” He rasps, his eyes shifting nervously over you, fingers itching to reach out for you.
You shake your head, “Of course, is everything ok?”
Yoongi opens his mouth immediately as if he’s already has an answer prepared but, he deflates soon after, looking at you helplessly, “No, not really I-“
He takes a deep breath, looking away from you, trying to keep it together. You don’t say a word as you close the space between you, moving to stand in front of his seated figure. Instantly, you pull him into a warm hug, holding him tightly, not needing him to explain just yet.
Yoongi feels so much of the tension melt away from his body as he feels your embrace, his arms coming up to reciprocate, burying his face into your hip.
The two of you don’t speak for a few seconds but, you feel Yoongi shake silently, not daring to untuck his face from you as he lets the tears spill over his eyes.
This causes your heart to shatter but, you don’t break the silence yet, allowing him to process his pain how he needs to. You keep him close though and, rub his back soothingly as he collects himself.
“I’m sorry…” He mumbles into your yellow sweatshirt, regretting that he’s staining the material with tears, “I should have texted you more, I just…this week’s been really hard.”
You shake your head, holding him tighter, “Don’t be sorry, I knew you were working on your project this week, it’s completely ok…”
This is said for his benefit of course, you didn’t want him to worry about your fear that he had lost interest when he clearly had something much more pressing going on.
“I wanted to text you…the first night I got like this but-“ He cuts himself off to sniffle, still not releasing you from his grip. “I didn’t want to bother you, or freak you out or anything…”
“Hey-“ You tilt his face towards yours, thumbing away one of the tears that is attempting to roll down his face, “-you’re never a bother to me, especially if something is wrong…”
He turns his face to place a gentle kiss against your thumb before sighing out shakily against your skin, “I can’t get this fucking song right Y/N. I’ve been at this for 5 months now and, it always comes out wrong, I’ve rewritten it like 10 different times and, I can’t do it. It’s shitty. I’m not cut out for this, I’m not good enough to go pro, I should’ve_”
He trails off, his eyes reddening as the tears collect once more at the corners of his eyes, “ I should’ve listened to my father, he told me to major in business, he said this would happen and, he was fucking right.”
His words create a deep ache within your heart.
How could someone so talented, doubt their abilities so much?
It’s not the first time you’ve seen it but, you’ve yet to understand it.
“I know you’re upset, I know that this seems impossible right now and, you’re unbelievably frustrated but, Yoongi…” You tilt his head back towards yours, your gaze growing firmer, “You were born to do this. You are the most talented musician I’ve ever known and, the quality of your stuff? The way you write, the way you think, it’s a sign. It’s a sign that this is what you’re meant to do. You’re not meant to be in a suit, slaving away at a corporate job you don’t even like, that’s what everyone else is doing. Yes, it may be more stable, it may provide a steady income and, give your parents something to brag about but, it isn’t you. Your happiness is in music, I can see that. You light up when you talk about it, you lit up on that fucking stage, and had half the city eating out of the palm of your hands. You are so incredible, you have no idea…”
Yoongi feels his heart swell in his chest, no one has ever spoken to him about his music like this, not with this much passion. But then again, Yoongi’s never known another person like you, he’s never known another that can make him feel so good.
“But jagi…the song…it’s not coming together, my professor is going to hate it…” He urges, anxiety still squirming around in his stomach. He wraps his arms around you tighter though, feeling a bit of comfort at your words.
“Did you think the crowd at Glacier was going to hate your song too?” You point out and, as you do, he bites his lip, sniffling again.
“Yeah…I did…”
A hand is carded gently through his damp hair as you smile down at him, “And look what happened Agust D, you became the city’s champion underground rapper. Did you lock yourself up in this studio and live off of Americanos for weeks on end then too?”
A smile threatens his lips, “You remembered my order…” he sighs, nodding reluctantly at your question, “I do this a lot…”
A breath is released through your nose as you smile gently at his observation but, the frown between your brows remains, “I don’t want to tell you how to live your life Yoongi but, you can’t do this to yourself. I know self-doubt can be borderline parasitic sometimes but, you have to try and cut yourself some slack. I know how hard anxiety can be, I know it can make you feel like the world is coming to an end but, please know that you are so much more capable than you realize. Sometimes it helps to step away from something and, revisit it when you’ve had time to clear your head. I have to do that with my proposals all the time…”
Yoongi moves back slightly to wipe a hand over his face, taking a deep breath as he nods in consideration of your words, “You’re right…I know you’re right. It’s just hard for me not to fall into this cycle sometimes. I got help when I started school, for my anxiety and, it helped but, old habits die hard you know? I just start overthinking everything…I can never get rid of that part.”
You lean down to press a kiss to his forehead before slowly helping him to his feet. “You might not ever get rid of that, you’re only human. Overthinking is my first reaction too but, over the years, I’ve slowly learned to not trust every crazy scenario my brain comes up with.”
He smiles and, this time you see it reach his eyes, the sight calms you significantly. “You’re…”
Yoongi shakes his head, “I knew you’d say the right thing, you always do…”
“Come here.” You smile, pulling him into a hug, tucking your face into his neck, “I’m sorry you’ve been going through this…try to reach out earlier next time ok? So this doesn’t go on so long, you know I’m here for you.”
He nods sagely, rubbing his hands on your lower back, “ I will, I promise…”
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Roughly an hour later, after you’ve gotten Yoongi to eat a good meal, the two of you start indulging in one another, the lack of contact starting to get to both of you. 
Your lips peck against Yoongi’s gently, just as a means to soothe him, your hands placed firmly on his shoulders.
 “I just...” He whispers against your mouth, attempting to melt away against your touch.   
He needs it, now more than ever.  
“Hm?” You hum gently, combing your fingers through his hair, nails scratching tenderly at his scalp.  
“I just don’t want to think anymore.” He breathes, responding more and more to the kisses placed against his lips.  
The column of his throat is eagerly arching towards your lips in a silent invitation. At the sight of his swallow, tender flesh, you frown at the lack of color there.  
“Your marks are gone.” You murmur, kissing the corner of his mouth  
Yoongi swears he wants to cry. He's kept his distance all week, trying to make sense of his emotions, trying to perfect his composition. But now, with you here, touching him, loving on him, he realizes how desperate he is for you; for relief.  
“Make new ones please...I just want to stop thinking...help me.” He practically keens his response but, he keeps it in check for the most part, not wanting you to consent for the wrong reasons.   
You bring your eyes to his, holding his desperate gaze, a smirk beginning to play on your lips.  
“How do you want me to help you?” You tease, encouraging him to articulate his desires.   
His cheeks flush even more, his Adams apple bobbing as he attempts to swallow back his nerves.  
He doesn’t know what’s come over him but, your tone compels him to his knees and, as his jean clad limbs touch the tile, he speaks, “You know...you know me, you know how to take care of me...”   
The response goes straight between your thighs; his small voice, his display of respect, you can tell this is something he’s had on his mind or awhile and, after the week he’s endured, you conclude that he needs to let loose.   
A finger is curled under his chin, directing his cat-like eyes up towards your own. You can tell he’s nervous but, the way he shifts eagerly on the floor tells you he’s more than ready for you.  
“You think so?” You coo, thumbing over his chin, smirking down at him  
He nods eagerly at the conclusion of your first sentence but, continues to nod throughout your teasing.  
“Use your words...” You urge, tightening your grip on his chin, admiring how beautiful he is on his knees.   
“Ye--...” His voice is already shot so, he clears his throat attempting to speak clearer, “Yes...”  
Your teeth press into your bottom lip, as your hand moves from his chin to push his faded brown hair away from his forehead.  
 “You want me to call the shots so you don’t have to?” You’re taking your time to rile him up, knowing it will pay off for him in the end.  
Another eager nod comes from Yoongi as he pushes against your hand, his doll-like lips going dry from his heavy breathing.  
“Yeah...I trust you; I’ll be so good for you, I promise.” He vows, lips brushing against your wrist, his dark eyes never once leaving yours.  “Please…” 
You tug on his hair then, drawing a whimper deep from within his chest. Yoongi feels his nipples harden as the pain pricks deliciously against his scalp.  
“You like this right? When I pull on it?”   
“Yes.” He breathes, shivering as your fingers brush across his lips and, down over his neck.  
“And...” You whisper, keeping your tone gentle as your hand wraps around Yoongi’s throat.  
This causes him to exhale shakily, his cautious eyes widening like saucers as he stares up at you.  
“Wh-…"  
You attempt to finish your sentence but, Yoongi’s shaky voice beats you to it, his request tumbling clumsily past his lips.  
“Fuck...please choke me...”  
He sounds so weak and, yet so sure of himself at the same time. You two had just begun breaching your sexual interests but, stepping into true dominant/submissive roles is something you’ve yet to do.
Whatever is about to happen, is going to be completely new territory for the both of you.   
The tightening around Yoongi’s throat makes him see stars; he feels like one of those cartoon characters that’s just been hit with a ton of bricks. Its intoxicating.   
“Oh-” Yoongi’s voice is raspier underneath your grip, his dick plumping up painfully against the zipper of his jeans.   
“You like when I choke you?” You coo, still holding his throat but, decreasing the pressure slightly.  
He nods, gasping as you tighten your grip again, testing the waters. Yoongi can already feel the dampness in his jeans but, he doesn’t care, he wants so much more tonight; he wants you to ruin him.   
“Use your words...” You remind him gently, urging him to open up as your free hand combs back through his hair.  
He exhales shakily once again, “Yes...”  
A fond smile is on your face then as you take a moment to run your fingers through his chestnut locks. You slowly urge him towards you so that he’s close enough to rest his chin against the center of your stomach. Yoongi stares up eagerly, awaiting instructions, his breathing uneven and, you take the small moment of silence to tug on his hair again. This causes his hands to come up and grip your outer thighs in desperation and, if he wasn’t already suffering in his jeans before, he definitely is now.   
With a salacious smirk you slowly bend at the waist so you can brush your lips against Yoongi’s, holding his gaze all the while, “I need a safe word from you...can you think of one for me?”   
Yoongi can’t think of anything aside from you at the moment along with his painfully hard dick threatening to bust out of his jeans but, he tries his best to wrack his brain for a suitable answer.  
“Dragon.”   
He scans your face for approval, hoping his choice was sufficient and, if you weren’t fulfilling the role of caretaker, you would be melting onto the floor right now.  
“Dragon it is...” You smile, combing a hand through his hair again, resisting the urge to tug on it, “You use that word anytime you need to ok? And we’ll stop...”  
Yoongi returns your smile, exhaling at the touch of your fingers, “Ok...”  
“Good boy.” The words are spoken into his hair when you lean over to kiss the top of his head. His hands haven’t moved from the outside of your thighs and, at the touch of your lips, he squeezes them again, “Stand up for me.”  
At your request, you move away from him, offering your hands as support. Yoongi looks at them tentatively before interlocking his fingers with yours and, slowly moving to his feet. Through the holes in his jeans, you can see how red his knees got from kneeling on the floor.  
You want the rest of him to match...  
“Come here...” You practically coo at him, curling a finger in your direction, beckoning him towards you. Yoongi never takes his eyes off of you as he takes the three steps necessary to reach you. As he stands before you, you keep his eye contact and, curl your fingers underneath the hem of his grey hoodie.  
“Arms up.”   
He obliges immediately, raising them high above his head, allowing you to slowly pull the material off of his body. Yoongi feels the hairs on his arms stand at attention as the cooler air of the studio hits his exposed skin. Without instruction you hook a finger underneath his chin and, silently bring his lips to yours. The two of you kiss, slow and sweet, taking time to lull deeper into one another. Your tongue slips in first, laving against Yoongi’s timid but eager mouth, as your hands begin slowly moving up the sides of his torso. A smirk is pushed into the kiss when Yoongi shivers at your touch, his whole body on fire for you.   
“You trust me to take care of you right?” You murmur into his mouth and, not two seconds go by before he’s nodding. “You’re gonna be good for me?”  
A half of a whimper slips out of Yoongi’s swollen lips, his hands come out to touch your waist as he nods again.  
“Yes, I’ll be good...”  
You smirk again, deciding that one of your goals tonight is to get Yoongi to feel more comfortable talking dirty to you. It’s a quality he possesses and, you can tell it’s something he’s into but, it takes a certain level of lust to send him there.   
“Why are you gonna be good for me?” The question is spoken between a few kisses and, you can’t express the delight you feel when he’s cheeks go red again.  
“Because-” His words are cut off as you slowly start to tickle your fingers over his ribs, the pads of your thumbs inching toward his erect nipples. “…. you deserve my respect. You deserve my obedience...”  
Good answer.  
“What makes me so deserving hm?” You coo against his neck, sucking gently against the sweet spot at the juncture of his collar bone. Before he can answer, you swipe your thumbs over his nipples. Yoongi swears he already feels like he’s going to pass out but, he does his best to answer coherently.   
“All women deserve my respect but, you...” He breathes, his head falling back on his shoulders, exposing his skin to you,, his hips rutting forward as you continue brushing your thumbs over his nipples, “you’re the best woman I know...you always take care of me, you’re always so nice to me. I wanna give you everything I can, so I’m worthy for you.”   
Yoongi is more than worthy enough for you but, given his history with insecurity, you can’t say his answer surprises you. However, if you weren’t melting into the floor before, you certainly are now.   
“You are worthy angel, come here...” The whispered command brings Yoongi’s mouth back onto yours as he swears he could cry at the particular pet name you just chose.  
Do you really think he’s an angel?  
He can’t imagine why...  
With your bodies pressed together and, your lips delicately tending to his, you speak again, initiating the rest of your plan, “Are you ready to play Yoongi?”  
Another nod comes from the angel in question, his nose nudging against yours as he does,   
“Mhm...”  
God, you didn’t know you’d be this into his submission but, here you are, completely drenched and he hasn’t even touched you yet.   
“Sit down on the chair for me, hands on the arm rests.” 
He follows orders, sitting down on his desk chair, spreading his legs to accommodate the throbbing erection pushing against his zipper.  His long fingers curl over the edges of the arm rests as his chest rises and falls with his increasing heartrate.     
You watch him carefully, mulling over multiple options that will hopefully make him cum so hard he can’t think straight. The first move you make is removing your hoodie, baring your black lacy bra to him: an article of clothing you chose specifically because you knew he liked it.  
The thing is though, Yoongi is no ordinary man. When he’s truly submitting, he does nothing without permission, not even look at you. Even as you step in front of him, Yoongi’s eyes stay glued to the floor but, the ever increasing motion of his chest gives away his reaction.  
“Didn’t you miss me Yoongi? Why aren’t you looking at me?” You grin, knowing the answer already 
He shakes his head, not wanting you to misunderstand him, “I missed you, so much, I just hadn’t asked permission to look at you yet. May I look at you?” 
“You may.” 
He doesn’t need further coaxing. He immediately brings his eyes up to your body, scanning over you eagerly, wincing as he feels his dick twitch in his jeans. 
“So pretty...” He murmurs, eyes full of adoration, “thank you for letting me see you...” 
“Don’t look away.” You demand softly, smirking in his direction as you slowly unclip your bra, revealing your breasts to him. As the cool air of the studio hits your sensitive chest, your nipples harden causing Yoongi to finally lick his lips.  
He wants them in his mouth so badly but, he wouldn’t dare question your plan. He knows you’re going to do right by him. 
“Jagi...” Yoongi pulls in another deep breath to calm himself, resisting the urge to gawk at you, “you’re so beautiful...” 
You’ve moved in closer to him, standing between his thighs in just your leggings before dipping down to kneel on the floor. 
As your nails slowly slide up his legs, you respond, “I wish you knew how beautiful I think you are...maybe then you’d be able to see what I see.” 
Yoongi’s lips part in awe of what you just said, feeling very overwhelmed before the two of you have even started.  
“You think_” He exhales, eyes fluttering with the sensation of your fingers inching closer to the inseam of his jeans, “…you think I’m beautiful?”
Your fingers tickle over his inner thighs before crawling over his unstable hips and towards his zipper. As you reach his erection, your eyes travel to his, catching a glimpse of his fucked out expression. His pupils are dilated, his lips are swollen, cheeks pink and puffy like fresh cherry blossoms, his fingers twitch on the arm rests; he’s growing desperate with anticipation.
“You are the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen Min Yoongi. I wouldn’t be caught dead on my knees for any other man…” You whisper, holding his gaze as you yank down his zipper, the motion causing a gasp to leave his lips. The relief is minimal but, Yoongi is grateful that his swollen dick finally has the room fully stand at attention. 
You deserve his full attention.
“You’re beautiful…” Is all he manages, his ability to form coherent sentences slowly slipping away.
His hips are lifted at your instructions as you pull his jeans and boxers from his hips, leaving him completely exposed to you. Yoongi feels a little insecure, his got a bit of a tummy on him as he’s been skipping the gym and, eating nothing but takeout the past few months. He didn’t shave either and, he’s waiting for some sort of negative reaction from you but, instead he feels the sharp pull of arousal in his stomach as you start kissing up his thighs.
“I should punish you for the way you’ve treated yourself this past week…” You admonish before taking the tender flesh of his inner thigh between your teeth, sucking hard enough to make him squirm.
Yoongi’s breath catches as he winces from the pain, his thigh jumping away from the sensation, “I’m sorry…I’m really sorry.”
Your tongue laves over the battered flesh before you make your way to the other thigh, taking time to blow cool air over his engorged dick. He shivers whilst thinking of what he would give to be in your mouth right now but, he won’t beg. He won’t try and sway you in any direction; he wants your full control.
“I told you last weekend not to talk shit to yourself didn’t I? So you can imagine my surprise when I come in here tonight and, you’re doing just that…you don’t want to disobey me do you?” You coo, pouting your lips before sucking his skin back between your teeth, creating an identical mark on his right thigh.
“Ah-“ He whimpers, squeezing his eyes shut, feeling rather tipsy at the sensation of pain, “No…of course not. I want to listen…”
A dark chuckle leaves your lips as you start placing kisses up his thigh, a wicked sense of delight coursing when his dick twitches towards your mouth, “Oh he wants to listen now does he?  Is it because my lips are so close to your dick?”
Yoongi grips the arm rests, his fingers slipping off due to the sweat created by his palms. Despite the cool temperature of the room, he feels like he’s on fire, he doesn’t think his ever been this turned on in his life.
“No, that’s not the only reason…” His hips jerk along with his stomach trembling when he feels your nails tickle their way over his hips, “I want to be good for you.”
As your nails conclude their teasing over his lower stomach, you let them rest against his hip bones as you ask your next question, “Mm, then you’ll sit there like a good boy while I have my way with you then won’t you?”
Before he can answer your question, a ragged whimper leaves his throat when you scratch your nails harshly across his soft pale skin, leaving aggravated lines of red as you do.
“Oh my fucking god…” He mumbles, eyes watering when his dick does the impossible and swells further, “I’d sit here like a good boy no matter what you wanted to do to me…”
He confesses, his faded chestnut hair sticking to his forehead, his eyes completely blown out with lust.
You prepare your nails to scratch him again and tickle them up the sides of his body, taking a moment to brush your fingertips over his pert nipples. Yoongi’s body is really sensitive but, his chest in particular always garnishes a special reaction from him. Your nails settle right where his heart is and, you can actually feel it pounding against his chest, “I want you to touch yourself for me…can you do that?”
Yoongi lets out a shaky breath and, once again you interrupt his answer by dragging your nails across his chest, digging in harder this time.
He actually feels his dick leaking at the sensation whilst his body arches off the desk chair, craving more of your touch.
“I have to go slow…I’m so hard right now, I don’t know how I’m gonna last….” He warns, his eyes shifting in uncertainty and, you take the time to admire how utterly innocent he looks.
Yoongi may be intimidating to those who don’t know him but, to you, with you, he is the softest man you’ve ever known.
But now isn’t the time for tenderness, you know what he needs.
He needs to be ruined.
So you’ll do just that…
Your hand comes out to wrap around his neck which elicits another gasp from his pink lips, his body going limp at your touch. You squeeze gently, just enough to slow the air circulation and lean in so your lips can brush against his.
“You’ll last because I tell you to last, because this dick belongs to me doesn’t it?”
Yoongi’s face is weak with pleasure as he nods eagerly, a small whimper leaving his lips, “Uh huh…”
A smirk forms on your lips as you squeeze his throat a little tighter, his dick jumping in response, “Say it…”
“My…my dick is yours jagi…” He gasps when you use your free hand to brush gently over his aching nipples, the sensation a huge contrast from what you’re doing to his throat.
“Your cum is mine…” You egg him on, dragging the pad of your thumb gently over either of his nipples.
“Ugh fuck…” He curses, his eyes locking onto yours and lull in and out of focus, “My cum is yours…everything is yours…”
Licking your lips, you loosen your grip slightly, giggling wickedly as he tries to reach for your lips, “You want me to hurt you while you jack off baby?”
Yoongi swears you must be sent from heaven, or maybe hell, either way, he’s dancing on the edges of euphoria at the moment. It’s like you know exactly what he’s thinking, he’s never known anyone who can anticipate his desires so well.
“Mhm…” He hums, the sound edging very close to a coo.
There is something that crosses your mind, something you hadn’t thought of before this began: was Yoongi capable of going into subspace? Because the glossy eyed expression, the yearning look, the pliant posture and slack jaw, everything about him looks like he’s heading in that direction.
“Yeah? You want me to hurt you really good?”
His mouth falls open as soon as you slide your cupped hand up his throat, your thumb brushing tenderly against his lips, “Yeah…please hurt me…”
Oh fuck, he’s right there…
“Suck…” You command gently, staring into his eyes, which have started to glaze over at your touch. He takes your thumb in his mouth, sucking eagerly, holding your eyes for approval, laving his tongue against the tip of it. “show me how you touch yourself baby…”
He nods, still sucking on your thumb before removing his sweaty hand down to his aching length. Yoongi’s eyes squeeze shut as he slowly curves a fist around himself, and, his leg twitches when he starts stroking his dick.
The relief is instant and, you feel the vibrations of his moans against your thumb. As he works himself up, you move away from him to kneel back between his knees.
His breathing is heavier, his toes are fidgeting against the floor but, his eyes refuse to leave yours, even as they threaten to close from pleasure.
You slowly tease your nails down his chest, over his ribs and hips, dangerously close to his dick, over his now bruised inner thighs and, all the way down to his ankles.
He brushes his thumb over his tip, a small whimper leaving his lips as his eyes squeeze close at the sensation. He’s already close, you’ve been winding him up for the past 45 minutes but, he holds on desperately, not wanting this to end.
“What do you think about when you touch yourself Yoongi?”
He takes another shaky breath and, does his best to swallow properly, despite his mouth being completely dry, “Lately, all I think about is you…I don’t even watch porn that often…”
Before you ask another question, you dig your nails into his calves and slowly begin dragging them up his legs. His whole body jerks in response, his hand faltering over his tip, he has to pull away for a moment, he almost came right there.
“ohmygod….” He keens, mostly to his self, his wide eyes looking away for a moment while he desperately tries to get a hold of himself.
“Oh but, you do watch porn? You’re cumming for other women then?” You tease and, Yoongi would panic that you’re actually upset but, the playful smirk on your face tells him that you’re just giving him a hard time.
“I don’t watch women…” He breathes, a ghost of smirk now playing on his own lips, “I watch men mostly, women in porn are annoying…they’re all annoying honestly…”
This makes you giggle but, you feel yourself growing wetter at the thought of Yoongi, getting off to men.
“So you think of me sometimes?” You’re still teasing him and, he knows you’re fishing but, he’s so into you he doesn’t care; he’d write a fucking thesis on you if he had the time.
He shakes his head, stifling a moan as you drag your nails over his hips when his hand reaches the tip of his dick; he really doesn’t know how he’s going to last.
“No…you don’t get it…” His breath is fucked and, his dick is so hard he wants to cry, it takes everything in him not to beg, “I think about you all the time…I’ve been thinking about you, ever since I came to your house that first time…”
Lust swirls deep in your panties; you don’t know how much longer you’re going to be able to do this either, his dick looks so good, hard, swollen and aching to be fucked. But you haven’t finished ruining him yet, you want him completely desperate before you give in.
“When I pulled your hair the first time?” You smirk, your hands travelling up his body once again as he nods, licking over his lips.
“Ye…yeah…that’s why I left so quickly, you made me hard…” He gasps again as your hand makes it back up to his neck, “…I…are you gonna choke me again?” His eyes look wary, almost frightened, the motions on his dick slowing again, “I don’t….jagi, I don’t know what to do…I don’t want to disappoint you but, if you…if you choke me again, I don’t…”
You smirk, tightening your hand around his neck before he can finish his sentence, “You’re gonna what baby?
“Oh fuck-“ He squeaks, his eyes starting to water when he squeezes over his tip, trying to halt his release, “Jagiya…I can’t…I can’t hold it, you have to stop…”
“Hold it, or I’ll tie you to this chair and leave you like this…” You hiss into his mouth, and his brow furrows in desperation but, his balls tighten further at your threat. The hand around his neck doesn’t cease its constriction and, his hand actually begins to move faster on his length.
His starting to learn…
“Good boy…don’t stop…” You kiss at his lips but, not long enough for him to respond to you, his whole body on fire and shivering at the same time.
Yoongi nods in determination, a shaky breath leaving his nose as he follows orders. He tenses however as you stand up, your left hand coming up to comb through his hair, which is matted against his forehead with sweat.
“Please…” He whimpers but, its not for permission to cum, you know exactly what it’s for.
Curling your fingers around the roots of his hair you tug hard enough to push his head back against the desk chair and, before he can even react, you use your other hand to tighten around his throat.
That’s it, that’s what breaks him.
Tears collect at the corner of his eyes as they widen like saucers, his mouth falling back open as he tries to cry out but, he’s too hoarse to do so.
“Y/N please…baby…baby please, pleasefuckme, pleasefuckme, I can’t…I need you...“ He’s completely lost it, he’s rambling, his eyes aren’t even in focus.
He isn’t even really looking at you but, you know you’ve got him, he’s made it there.
In less than ten seconds, he’s out of the desk chair and onto the pull out couch. He trembles beneath you; his hands reach up as if the lack of contact is painful.
Leaning down to him, you press a tender kiss to his lips to which he responds like a starving man.
“Please jagi…please I need you so bad, I’m sorry I need you, I need you…I really fucking need you…” He sounds like his about to cry and you nod, your tenderness returning just as quickly as it left, your panties pushed haphazardly off of your hips
“Hey…hey...I’m coming angel, I’m coming, just breath for me ok? I’m going to make it better…” You coo, pressing him gently into the squeaky mattress of the pull out couch, the cool sheets welcome against his hot skin.
He nods, not fully able to focus as he wraps his hands around your hips. You press another kiss to his lips before your final command is given, “As soon as I sink down onto you, I want you to cum ok? Can you do that for me?”
Yoongi’s bleary gaze finally locks onto your eyes, his body weakened with desire, “I’ll do anything for you…”
You can’t even recognize his voice, it’s so small, so weak and, so in…
You can’t say it.
Not yet.
But you can feel it, its bubbling right underneath the surface.
As soon as you sink down on him, you give him a few good strokes of your drenched heat before his whole body arches off the bed. Yoongi’s face is buried into your neck, his dull nails dig into your hips as he lets out a cry that shatters you.
You can feel how much he’s cumming as shot after shot of his release paints the inside of you. He’s cumming so hard that he starts crying, his silent whimpering enough to send you over the edge with him.
“don’t stop…don’t stop…” He cries into your neck, holding you so tight to him that it restricts your movements.
All you can do is nod as white hot pleasure takes over your senses, your orgasm just as intense given the events of the last hour.
Yoongi completely loses himself, he cums again, his hips glued to yours as he cries for you. Part of him would feel embarrassed but, he’s too fucked out to care. He’s too in…
Not yet.
He can’t say it, but it’s in his throat.
Its in his heart.
God, he’s never felt so good in his life, he never knew it could be this good.
“Y/N…” He croaks when your hips start settling down. His face doesn’t leave your neck but, he starts sucking gently on it, trying to ground himself.
He feels like he’s floating.
“Baby…” Yoongi practically coos, hands glued to your skin, still sniffling as his tears slowly come to a halt.
The smile that graces your face is brilliant and full of adoration. You slowly pull off of him, “I’m right here angel, I got you…”
You want to get him in a more comfortable position so you can hold him but when you try to pull away to do so, he panics, his glossy eyes widening in fear.
“No…no…” He tries to protest but, you kiss his forehead to reassure him
“Shh…I’m not going anywhere, I just want to hold you…come here for me…” You murmur, kissing his forehead again.
He’s suspicious, not thinking clearly but, he trusts you, not moving more than an inch away from your body as you shift the two of you to sit against the back of the couch. Yoongi scrambles to get closer to you, making himself smaller as he lays his upper half into your chest, tucking his face back into your neck.
“I got you baby boy, I got you…” You whisper, hoping the soft blue light in the studio will soothe him further along with gentle kisses pressed to his skin, “You did so good for me angel…”
Silent tears fall down his cheeks as he tucks further into you, “I did good?”
He checks again, feeling so vulnerable and, yet so safe at the same time.
You smile, pressing a kiss to his sweaty forehead, your nails gently combing his hair back, “You did amazing. You were so good for me.”
His small mouth curves in a dreamy smile, still trembling but, feeling slightly more grounded, “You keep calling me angel….you’re the angel…my angel.”
“You can’t steal my nickname…” You giggle, causing his small smile to turn into a gummier smile as he nuzzles your neck.
“So pretty…” Is all he can think of to say but, you know he’s talking about your laugh.
God, you feel like crying right now though, you could have never guessed that you could feel this strongly about another person.
When a comfortable silence falls over you, you take a moment to notice how banged up he really is. His body is decorated with pinks and purples, scratches, bites, a hicky or two; you really did a number on him and, you want to take care of his skin before it gets too uncomfortable.
“Yoongi? Baby, I need to put something on your scratches, I have cooling gel in my bag-“ You begin to say but, his eyes quickly widen again and, the same panicked look returns.
“Don’t…don’t go-“ He urges, holding you tighter.
You know it’s a symptom of him being in subspace, he doesn’t actually think your leaving but, a lack of contact with you makes him nervous.
“I’ll come right back, my bag is on the floor…” You assure him gently, pressing a kiss between his eyes.
His eyes flutter shut at your kiss and, his hands tighten on you one last time before, he kind of gets a grip on himself.
He knows he’s being a little unreasonable but, he’s never felt like this before, he feels intoxicated and so incredibly needy.
“Ok…” He reluctantly agrees
Another kiss is placed to his forehead before you move quickly to retrieve the gel from your purse. As soon as you sit back down with him, he immediately wraps himself around you, hiding away in your neck as you start to apply the gel to his skin. His breathing is beginning to even out as he melts into you, letting you take care of him.
Like you always do…
“How do you feel?” You whisper into his hair as you smooth the substance over his neck, which has reddened slightly.
“I feel high…” He muses, sounding a little bit more like himself.
His response causes you to giggle, “I’m that good huh?”
Yoongi smirks, kissing your neck slowly, “You invented sex…”
Another giggle bubbles over your lips, as you pull the sheet over Yoongi’s body, “Do you feel better then?”
“Mhm…” He hums into your neck, kissing up the length of it before finding your lips. A soft kiss is placed there before he speaks again, “I wish I could articulate better but, you fucked me stupid jagi…”
Smiling into the kiss, you comb a hand through his hair, scratching gently at the scalp, “Don’t worry about it, take your time, I’m right here if you need me…”
The two of you stay like this for quite some time, holding each other, as you slowly settle back down. Yoongi stays quiet for the most part, doing his best to center his thinking which proves to be quite easy as the only thing he can really think about is you.
A half an hour passes before he finally speaks up, feeling the need to explain something to you.
“I used to live here…” He murmurs, face still tucked into your chest
Your brow furrows at his statement, “Here? At the studio?”
He shakes his head, “It wasn’t always a studio, ten years ago it was a halfway house for troubled youth…”
The beating of your heart stalls but, as you open your mouth to respond, Yoongi continues, his voice stabilizing finally, “My parents are not supportive of what I do. When I was a teenager, we used to fight all the time about it. They tried to force me to stop but, I never listened. I snuck out to do music all the time and, started failing out of school. One night, my father came in and freaked out on me, he destroyed my lyric pages and, threw everything away. The next day, I came home from school and, they had kicked me out. My older brother tried to stop them but, they wouldn’t listen...”
Your chest feels tight as you try your hardest not to let your emotions overflow; you never knew how much Yoongi has endured.
“Sejin, the guy at the front desk, he’s a friend of my older brother,” He rasps, placing another kiss to your skin as a means to soothe himself, “he took me in with nothing but my old laptop and, the clothes on my back. My parents wouldn’t let me take anything. I finished school in the city and, ended up landing a scholarship at our university, that’s where I met Hobi and, reconnected with Namjoon. Once he found out what happened to me, he insisted I move in with him while I got my degree. The rest you already know…”
You hold him tighter, kissing his forehead for the 100th time, “I’m so sorry Yoongi, I didn’t know you went through all of that. You’re so strong for pushing towards your dreams despite everything being so hard for you…”
He smiles gently and the wise look has settled back into his eyes as he looks up at you, “You see why I get a little nervous sometimes now…I’m so worried that my parents are going to be right.”
Nodding, you thumb over his cheek, “I do but, please know that you’ve already proved your parents wrong. After everything you’ve endured, you still keep pushing and, as long as you keep dreaming, you’ll never fail…”
A sudden kiss is pressed to your lips then, which Yoongi turns slow and sweet.
Just like him…
“On my worst days, I tell myself that all of this will be worth it someday…” He whispers against your lips, continuing to kiss at them
“It will be, everything will pay off...”
“It’s already started to…ever since my classroom switched…” He smiles, brushing a piece of hair from your face.
Intense emotion blooms fully in your heart when he responds and, you have to shake your head to keep yourself from crying, “Does that mean you’ll be my date tomorrow then?”
He chuckles, his eyes brightening up significantly as he leans into your lips,
“Tomorrow and, any other time you’ll have me.”
if you let me, here’s what i’ll do: i’ll take care of you
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happys-crazy-queen22 · 7 years ago
Text
A Very Awkward Dinner
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(Gif Credit to @stilinskikissme )
"So I hear Sweet Pea is coming for dinner"? Jughead asked as he snatched a frie from your plate. You smacked his hand away. "Yeah that's right, dad said it was fine". "What are we having"? He asked questinablely. "You're going to be there, so it doesnt matter what we are having". "It does, if chicken nuggets and mac n cheese than yes but if its lasagna then no". "What, you like lasagna, I saw you eat a whole one by yourself all at once". "You piglet". "True, I really dont want to come". He slumped over. "Deal with it, you could bring Betty". "Cool". Purking up, he was excited to have Betty over for dinner and you were very happy that your dad actually let Sweet Pea come for dinner. Even though Sweet Pea was a Serpent, FP didnt like him dating his daughter. But after a while FP got use to it and when Pea stood up for you when Ghoulies tried to attack you, FP welcomed him with open arms into the family. Sunday dinner was in the process of being made when you got a text from Pea saying he was running late. "When are we going to eat"? Jughead whined as he came in, slumping down in a chair. "Sweet Pea's running late and dinner is not ready yet, so go wait with Betty". "She's hungry too". "Then eat something you baby". Giggling as you threw a pack of cookies at him. "Happy now"? "Very, these are my favorite". He danced around as he went back into the living room. "Oh god, I have a toddler as a big brother, how did this happen"? You questioned.
Finally dinner was done just as Sweet Pea came in carrying a bag. "Hey Princess". He came up behind you, kissing your cheek. "Hey Pea, what took you so long"? "I had to stop at the store". "For"? You crossed your arms. "Condoms". Your jaw dropped. "You stopped to get condoms , why did it take you so long"? "You know why, they had so many and I didn't know if you wanted the mint kind or the extra pleasure"? He smirked seductively. "I can't believe you're late because of condoms". While Sweet Pea and you were arguing about condoms, FP, Jughead and Betty came in quitely listening to every word yall said. "Dinner ready"? FP's stern voice made you both jump and making you blush in horror. "Yeah, lets eat". Jughead came in giggling, Betty hit his arm telling him to stop. FP's eyes never left Pea, just starring a hole in Sweet Peas head. Dinner was quit and very awkward, all you heard was metal hitting glass, the sound of food crunching and the crickets churping. "This is really good". Betty bravely spoke, trying to break the tension between Sweet Pea and FP. "Thank you, it's Peas favorite". Sweet Pea smiled, making FP stir in his seat. "So Y/N, what is your favorite"? Jughead chuckled. "Shut it Jug". You gave him the evil eye, kicking his shin under the table. He rubbed it as he spoke. "Why, I want to know and Pea might need this answer in the future". Sweet Pea turned his head blushing. "Stop Jughead". Betty warned him. "I dont know about all of you but I lost my appetite". FP threw his napkin on his plate and stormed out side. "Thanks alot Jug, I wanted a nice dinner and you have to start something, you couldn't have just let it go"? You wiped away a tear, feeling like you missed up this dinner, your relationship with your father and his and Sweet Peas relationship. You got up going after your father as Sweet Pea laid into Jughead. "Dude, what kind of friend and brother are you"? "Why are you doing this to Y/N"? Betty asked. "What, if you came here with condoms she would have done the same thing as I'm doing now". "No she wouldn't and you know that".
Mean while outside, FP lit a cigarette, running his hand threw his goatee, letting out a sigh. "I thought you quit"? You came up, wrapping your arms around you. "I did but I just found out my little girl is having sex, I think I'm entitled to smoke". "I'm sorry, I didn't know he was going to stop and actuallly get them now". "i just thought you'd be different". "What's that supposed to mean"? "I thought you would get out of this town and not be caught up with a Serpent". "Dad, I will, I am". "But I love Pea and you can't change that". "I'm not your little girl anymore". "You'll get pregnant and that will hold you back". "I'm not going to that's why he got condoms". "They dont always work, ask your brother". "Eww, gross". Scrunching up your nose. "Dad I'm going to have sex and I'm trying to be as careful as I can, at least Sweet Pea is doing his part, half of the population of guys dont take the time to do that". "He's different, he cares about me". "I just dont want you to end up like I did, like your mom". He sniffled. "You'll always be my little girl and I want to see you secede in life". "Dad, I promise that I will get out of here, even if that is with a kid attached to my hip with Sweet Pea working every job under the sun. We will make everything okay". FP came over to you, wrapping his arms around you, squeezing you tightly. "I just want whats best for you". "I know Dad, just dont get mad at Pea for caring for me". "I just can't believe he brought condoms to my house". He chuckled as you giggled into his shoulder. "That was stupid but at least we're protected". Laughing, FP groaned. "Yeah, I guess, just dont do it in the house okay"? "That's why Sweet Pea lives alone, Dad". "Oh god, you're going to kill your father Y/N, do you know that"? "Don't die on me, you'll have to meet your grandkids one day". "Stop right there, you're not having kids until you're married, have a degree in something and financially ready". "Okay". Going back into the house, you heard Betty yelling at Jughead to stop. Your heart stop for a second. He was trying to kill Sweet Pea. Oh shit! "What the hell it going on here, boys"? FP pulled them apart. You went over to look at Peas face. Betty looking at Jughead. "He wants to marry Y/N". Jughead breathed out, fixing his clothes. "What"? You and FP said together. "Not now, in the future". Sweet Pea held up his hands. "I love her and I want to be with her, so marrying her is the way to go, right"? "How close to the future"? FP asked, tilting his head, starring deep into Sweet Pea eyes. "Two or three years". "Rough estimate". FP's eyes went wide, you getting married means babies, meaning you may not get out of here, which made him go crazy. "RUN PEA RUN, cause you're dead". "What"? Sweet Pea and you looked at each other. "I'm not ready for kids yet, Dad, so calm down". You rolled your eyes. "Wait kids, no that's why I wear a condom when we have sex". Sweet Pea blushed. "You know that doesnt always work, ask Jughead". You laughed. Sweet Pea had a questonable look on his face. "Hold up, I'm a condom mishap baby"? Jughead said shocked. Betty and you started to giggle. "Sorry son". FP chuckled. "Well wasn't this a wonderful, awkward dinner". You laughed, wrapping your arms around Peas waist, as they all joined in.
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pokefanbri · 4 years ago
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When you feel the world has turned its back on you, or you turn your back on the world.
I promise will never, I will never make you feel like you're alone, that you cant come to me at your weakest because I would do what I can to help you be strong & help you up when you're down. That I'll take care of you, You're pain is my pain & I will help you the best of my ability to see it through with you. You will never have to worry of my locality or trust fading, because if I love you, you won't ever have to question how much & I will do everything in my power to do right by you. But my forgiveness shouldn't be abused or taken for granted to where my respect & love fades, just makes it harder when trust is being built & the taken away...its really not hard to show worthiness just dont be shitty to people.
Just know if you need me,I'll be there, I truly mean it, just don't walk all over me & lie to me makes things so much worse then it has to be, do right from the start. My heart is pure, but it's been hurt so much because it cares so much about the people that have broken & taken advantage of it, and even when destroyed, let down, & weakened its still loves with a passion..not completely broken but puts on another bandaid & keeps going.
Men are more complex than it seems. But I know they love & care of those that love them the most. I just don't know how he'd feel if he lost me too, if it would hurt just as much. If he loves & cares about me like he says, why hurt me at all, its unfair 😔 If im to really love somebody fully, they just have to be the sword to my shield, & fight along side me, by a good rock to get through things with. Hopefully reach a true purpose & something bigger than ourselves. Care for eachother & have our backs, because who else is gonna look after us when nobody else can. We have to look out for eachother. I'd much rather not lose hope, & not lose a dear friend over foolish things or whatever lost in translation when we're so much better than that, it's not worth the pain that comes with it, & beats having to lose somebody that means so much. With equal understanding & validation of our feelings I know we can overcome things if we believe we can, doubting ourselves & being so full of guilt & regret gets nowhere, & we punish ourselves cuz we don't know what we're doing or how to handle it. It's just how do we come to terms with everything that happened, find peace..to forgive ourselves so we can forgive eachother for the mistakes we've made & how alone we felt when together & worse now that we're apart..all of if that got us to where we are now...its a whole mess. Whats the point in breaking somebodys heart that had nothing but good intentions for you. Its hard enouph to find someone who genuinely cares about you. We're both pretty strong willed, strong when things are tough & only even stronger together.
I hate to admit it, but he did drastically shaped me into who I am now & where I currently am life. Which makes me feel my life was formed to this point, directed & led to him for a reason, he helped shape me, make me better, something did..because I'd do anything for him & be there for him if he needed me even if I was hurt which is so fucked & im worth so much more but he still for whatever reason is worth it to me..& cause we had a messed up beginning to something that could've been greater there's alot left unfinished. I feel so damn empty & lost without him, I feel stuck & trapped with nowhere else to go & I'm just waiting to be saved. I just want to see his face again, hug him tight, be his best friend again & show him as much light as I can. Really look into his eyes & show him how much he means to me. Because he's the best person I've ever met & he has no idea what my heart goes through for him. I miss him so much & it hurts that he's not here. He became a purpose & priority the moment I laid eyes on him & its so hard to let him go, I feel like I can't when theres supposed to be more than what I was I given & chances that have been blown without understanding why or how to fix it 😭. I can't go on with my soul somewhere else. Honestly my heart hasn't felt anything like this for anyone before, which makes the pain of the loss even more dreadful to bear. I don't want to lose him, he was the world to me, we were good to eachother the best we could but fell short, it happens..I know it in my heart we could do even better if we just try. But I also know it'll take time, even space to get a grasp on things & I just have to be patient.
When I love with a full & unimaginably heavy heart it doesn't care about getting hurt, it's the risk it takes to try & find somewhere it belongs. It has to hurt so that it knows the depth of how it can really love. And for intended purposes, I feel it's reached its cap when it comes to him. But is weaker & lost without him. Sorry to say but it's the God honest truth.
I have to let this out & say this now at my emotions peek while I can, cuz im a tired wreck rn that's literally crying out in anguish for him to hear her. There's no way to contact & I need him so much right now. I know he's around.. so where ever you are babe I hope you're hearing me somehow. I'm so sorry, I don't mean to be a nonstop wreckless talking idiot but I need to be heard just as much u know. Im probably too blunt & brutally honest sometimes for my own good too, but take with a grain of salt I don't mean to trouble you or cause you anxiety too or anything I miss things if I don't pay attention to every text give.. me a break? I have regrets & worry when anything I could say could mess things up when I mean well. Please don't be scared or hide,take all the time you need but plz dont leave me hanging again, the chance wasn't ruined it's okay. Hurts so much but I don't hold it against you just talk to me, where do we go from here, the things we've said we meant them..they can't just be taken back we've been through this before with unfulfilled promises...how do u say good heartwarming things without real meaning to it, just gets lost & forgotten, brushed aside like they meant nothing. Mean whats said & give me more credit where it's due, meet me in the middle,communicate, i can't do 1 sided decisions in general or relationship wise I need to be heard too.. understand me too & help me understand you more. Im just trying the best I can. We're grown as people we should be able & mature enough to not do the same dumb things over again when it should've been better. Idk pave a good path not destroy it right? Is this a minor setback or can we actually make a major comeback? Please forgive me,you know you can trust me. Just tell me it's gonna be okay, we'll be okay, reassure but be able to back it up. You must know how scared I am to lose you I just can't babe you're 1 in a million to me. Please don't give up before we even start. I still care about you nomatter what. Realistically, u know as well as I how shitty of a situation this is, we're besides ourselves, & can be a pain in eachothers butts...but we can make it through I just know it. I promise I will be there for you. Always
I hope you miss me too. I love you
I hope you're okay & well, & are eating well.
Take care of yourself, Hopefully talk soon if you're up for it
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sweet--sensation · 7 years ago
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Runaway (ft. Ong Seungwoo)
genre: fluff because requested!! college!au character/s: Ong Seungwoo
 inspired from bruno mars’ runaway. I did this style before so will be trying to do it again.
So easy to forget our love, All of the little things we do, Like calling for no reason Just to say the words "baby I love you" I know lately, I've been busy But a second doesn't go by Without you crossing my mind It's been so long since we had time Let's take a day & make everything right You were waiting by the bus shed next to  your house for your boyfriend Seungwoo, today were both your free days from the exhausting university life. Running in different majors had been the only thing keeping you both together from spending a lot of time with each other. Now that you both had a day free, he promised to spend the whole 24 hours with you.
So thus, here you were in your black tights, ankle boots, that cute little black and white dress you bought just for today, and a denim jacket over it. It had been a while and you wanted to look good infront of him.
The few minutes of being together a few times during lunch weren’t enough. Video calls during busy nights of studying, and when there was more time, both of you would spend the hours of slaving to your courses from the library and him driving you home, but lately things had been less and less as your majors started demanding more and more time.
Being an engineering student, and one of the top students at that, you understood completely why Seungwoo was busy. “it’s for our future” he had said a lot of times before, and still, the thought that he was thinking about spending his whole life with you made you feel queasy and utterly soft.
20 minutes had passed and still no sign of your boyfriend Ong. It wasn’t like him to be this late. The latest would usually be a max of 5mins and you were starting to worry.
An hour had passed and you felt dejected, you had called him a few times but he never picked up until you called his mom and finally finding out he was suddenly called by one of his groupmates saying that the project they had due tomorrow was no longer working, and being the leader, he had to immediately go and fix the problem.
“No biggie, I still have half the day to spend with him” you told yourself as you picked your bag up and walked back to your house, opting to wait for him there instead.
You had a few projects you had to finish up yourself being a visual arts student, but you were willing to put them on hold for a day just to be with your boyfriend, besides you were almost done with them anyway.
A familiar ringtone filling your room, picking up the phone right away with a smile on your face.
“Hey baby” You both greeted at the same time making you chuckle. You missed him so much.
The same wide smile slowly falling as you bit back the tears and the feeling of rejection or some sort, you had expected him to tell you that he was outside waiting for you but instead, he had called to apologize for today’s plans.
Apparently he needed to fix the whole machine, one of their group mates had accidentally broke it while trying to fix it’s movement and now only two of them were available and would take the whole day.
You would have wanted to come and visit but before you could respond, he seemed to be in a hurry, hanging up the phone before you could talk. “oh okay. I love---” click. “...you”
You were dejected, suddenly heavy in the chest as you push your phone away, changing into house clothes and had opened up your laptop to finish up editing the short movie that your group would be passing for the college film festival. Atleast it was something to keep you busy.
And although it had been hours, you had taken a lot of glances over at your phone but still, no notification from Ong.
You kind of missed highschool, being around him alot, you weren’t in the same class either but atleast you and him had enough time to be around each other. All of a sudden, a small thought crosses your mind, enough to pierce your currently fragile heart.
What if this was the start of you both drifting away from each other?
Girl, you've been so patient Spending nights alone & not complaining But I'll make it up to you, And I promise today I won't keep you waiting Please give me this one chance To remind you of everything we have I won't give up I'm too much in love And I want you to know that
It had been a month since the incident and him apologizing more and more often for dates he had to cancel. The calls were getting fewer, him hanging up more often as well. He sounded so stressed a lot lately and even though the heaviness in your chest was becoming unbearable, you had to keep it in. You loved him, you loved him too much you were willing to wait.
You were in the same university, completely different buildings and the most you both could do had been exchanging smiles when you passed by each other. You missed him, you missed him terribly, you were quite busy yourself but you always wanted to make sure you made time for Seungwoo.
Finally, the stack of projects done, being up till the early mornings to finish up editing. Spending days living off on caffeine and energy drinks were temporarily coming to and end. Finally getting a few days to rest.
And in all honesty, the past week Seungwoo had never left your thoughts, as much as you were busy, tired and dreading sleep, you wondered just how much tired he was. Wanting to comfort him but it wasn’t like you didn’t have the time, you would have made a few hours but everytime you would ask where he was, he’d have to say bye as sometimes you could hear angry voices of his groupmates arguing with each other.
Another month passing by as more dates continued to get cancelled, crying alone at night as you often felt like you both either needed to break up or needed a break. It felt like you were the only one who cared more for the relationship, calling often, texting him often, wanting to meet up for a while. You probably looked and sounded clingy, but it didn’t matter. You just wanted him to know you were still there for him.
Having free period, you had asked one of your close friends to come with you in the engineering department.
A few students recognizing you for either being Ong’s girlfriend, specially the higher batches and his batchmates, or being one of the members of the team that made it to the top 3 for the college film festival. The movie was shown for a week in the auditorium for anyone who wanted to watch.
“Huh? That’s Ong sunbae’s girlfriend?” You could hear a the confused whisper of a freshman towards the senior that had just greeted you. “I thought Kyulkyung unnie was his girlfriend”
now that, broke you into a hundred pieces but had shaken your head and kept the smile on your face. Ong would never cheat on you, you knew that, he had proved that a hundred times that despite the prettier girls after him, his eyes were only for you.
You held the lunch box you had a tad bit tighter that Chungha had noticed, a worried look spreading through her features as she tries to bite back words she wanted to ask.
“Hey Ong, Your girlfriend’s here!” It was Sungwoon, basically informing the whole class who had been busy chatting away, having their class recently ending. You met him a few times before and had been acquainted with the small male.
Your boyfriend had looked up as he was eating from Kyulkung’s lunch box, and damn they really did look good together but his wide smile just felt like a blur to you as you could only force a small smile and leave the food ontop of the closest table along with the small note you had written. He was making his way towards you when you had grabbed your friend’s wrist to drag her away from the room, hurriedly out of the building. You couldn’t hear him shouting your name and running after you, you didn’t see him contemplating if he should skip class or go to you once their professor had entered the room.
You were just so tired, and the feeling of being tired from school and from waiting was taking its toll on you.
You had not bothered to check your phone for the whole day, it was running on empty anyway and you had fallen asleep as soon as you changed and layed down on your bed.
What you had attempted for as a quick nap had turned into a full on sleep and your parents understanding how tired you must have been, never bothered to wake you up
not even when Ong had driven to your house that night, you weren’t picking up his calls nor answering his messages, and he didn’t know why you ran away from him like that.
Notes on your table scattered everywhere, photos of the both of you that had been the only companion you had when you were missing him. He was looking at it all, glancing from your desk and to your sleeping figure. He couldn’t help but press his lips into a grim line.
He felt so guilty all of a sudden, realizing he had been taking you for granted, realizing that despite him canceling out on all your dates because of school, not once have you ever brought it up to complain to him. The hurt you must have felt everytime he had to say sorry he couldn’t come.
Kneeling down next to your bedside, his fingers gently tangling themselves into your tresses, looking down at you softly, his thumb grazing gently against your forehead as he lays his cheek on the mattress just watching you sleep.
He had hurt you far more than he was aware but he had no intentions of letting you go. You were far too perfect for him, everything he wanted and more.
You were woken up for no reason but being in such a groggy state made you think you were dreaming when your eyes fluttered open only to be greeted by his handsome face and a soft smile on his lips.
“Hi baby” he greeted unmoving.
“You’re even in my dreams now?” A single tear escaping your eye as you reached out to touch his cheek with a bittersweet smile on your own lips. You had nuzzled into your pillow and took a deep breath before falling asleep again, although you swore his hand in yours felt so realistic.
Just take my hand, Fall in love with me again Let's runaway to the place Where love first found us Let's runaway for the day, Don't need anyone around us When everything in love gets so complicated It only takes a day to change it What I have to say can't wait All I need is a day So let's runaway for the day And I'll give everything in this moment And I promise to make everyday just like the day
You’d been asleep from 5pm till 7am the following day, atleast you have managed to rest for a solid 14 hours, your body feeling a little more re-energized. The type of feeling that caffeine can’t give plus the irritability from the past days now gone.
As you got up from bed to prepare for your first period which was a 9am class, you noticed your phone plugged up and fully charged and the photos and letters scattered on your table the past days were now stacked and organized back into it’s boxes on your table. “Mom must have fixed it” You thought as you went straight to the bathroom.
Choosing a simple plain black shirt, chucks and pants with a hoodie over it, you were ready for school after applying abit of make up.
Finally taking a glance at your phone, your eyes widened having over 50 missed calls all from Ong.
18 unread messages from your boyfriend 3 from Chungha 6 from your groupmates and other school related stuff
You had read the other messages first, pressing your lips together as you scrolled over Seungwoo’s messages. They were mostly asking where you were, why weren’t you picking up and some of the messages just the word “baby”, baby? babe :c, written on it. Your lip caught inbetween your teeth as you continued to scroll down. He was completely worried and you were feeling so guilty until you scrolled to the latest message and hell was it long.
“I know you’ve been busy but you still always made time for me. I know you have things you deal with too, and lately I haven’t been there for you I know I’ve been lacking as your boyfriend for the past months but I would like you to know that my feelings for you have never changed.
I still love you the way I have always did, the way I always do. There’s no one else for me other than you. I can’t imagine a life without you, I don’t want to imagine my life without you in it. You’re my past, present and future. You are everything for me. I’m sorry for all the times I haven’t been there for you when you needed me. I’ve been saying sorry to you a lot of times now but I sincerely really really  heol very very want to apologize maybe for a lot of things. Not being able to answer your messages, cancelling on our dates... and a lot more I probably am not even aware of
But not once have you ever said anything about it, instead you patiently waited for me and understood all of my situations.
How many times have I ever told you that I’m lucky to have you? Because I really am and I don’t want you to ever forget that.
I’m sorry, I’m the luckiest person in the whole universe because I have you in my life and most of all
I love you baby. Never ever forget that”
It was barely 10 in the morning and you were basically a mess of emotions. Wiping away the tears that won’t seem to stop from flowing. The message had been sent at 3 am.
Needing to fix your make up again but unable to do anythign with the puffy eyes due to the emotions you weren’t able to contain, you had made up your mind to just further fix your eye make up later on when you get to school.
A wide smile on your lips unable to be wiped off as that mere message from your boyfriend had you smiling the whole time, forming words in your head as you were planning to reply to him later.
“Hey gorgeous, you seem to be in a pretty good mood”
Startled by the familiar voice as you turned around to look at the male just as you closed the gate.
“Seungwoo!” you gasped out loud, a smile forming on his own lips as you’re suddenly enveloped in his arms, a gentle hug and the warmth of his body to yours making you sigh in complete satisfaction as you held onto him tighter than you had thought you would. “I missed you” breathing out the words quietly as neither of you wanting to let go just yet. It had been a long while since the least time you’d been this close to each other.
Looking down at you, your cheeks start to heat up at the way she stares, making you feel a little shy. “Wh-what? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing” His smile never fading. “I just realized again how beautiful you are. I haven’t seen you this close in months” he whispered back leaning in to press his forehead on yours.
“Seungwoo, it’s past 8... don’t you have a 7:30 class?”
“Baby! Why ruin the moment!” 
You couldn’t help but laugh at his reaction as he pulled away, taking your hand in his whole leading you towards the pick up truck that you’ve never seen before.
“Ah yeah this, my uncle asked me if we could switch cars for the week” he stated as he ushered you to the front seat, going to the driver’s seat afterwards and helping you buckle up.
It had also been sometime since he picked you up in the morning to school specially now that you no longer had the same schedule for morning classes.
“Uhm so I know that you always tell me you don’t want flowers but I still buy them for you anyway..... It’s been a long time since I gave you anything really.... so here” Your eyebrows raising due his words, speechless as he hands you a bouquet of pink roses 
“Seungwoo..” that was all that you could mutter again as you cradled the bouquet gently in your arms. He looked triumphant but it seemed like there was more to come.
Before he started the car had he reached out from the back again to give you a familiar looking stationary envelope, an all too familiar design capturing your gaze as you were once again overwhelmed with emotions.
It was one of those stationary he would give you from time to time even prior to dating him officially. It had been more than half the year since the last time you received such a letter and the fact that this one had over 3 pages in it, you couldn’t hold back the tears again, needing to take a moment. Covering your face with your hands as you started to sob quietly.
“no baby, baby please don’t cry” he muttered in a soft tone, stopping the car briefly on the side as he reaches out to wipe your tears.
Shaking your head, you looked at him with tears still pooling in your eyes. “I’m just.... so.. happy” you could barely get the words out. God did you want to hug him right here, kiss him right now but it took all your self restraint to keep seated.
It took a moment to calm you down not wanting both of you to be late for your classes, his hand on yours, thumb grazing over your knuckles as the smiles on your faces unable to leave your lips.
All the crying had made you grow a tad bit tired, falling asleep briefly until you woke up moments after.
“Baby... this isn’t the way to the uni” You noticed as he took a turn, opposite the direction of the university grounds. It was on the way to your old highschool completely puzzled as the car finally talks a halt on a familiar convenience store.
“Babe...” He had started off as he bit his lip and looked down. “Let’s run away”
“what??”
“Just for today”
It wasn’t something you had ever expected from Seungwoo. He was the type to go to class despite having a fever and now he was asking you to ditch school the whole day. It wasn’t a problem for you but for him...
“It’s because yesterday.... I just realized” He started off. “I haven’t been spending any time with you and just this once, I want to forget about everything and everyone and just be with you”
The whole day had been nothing but fun, both your phones turned off surprisingly he had also admitted to asking permission from your parents that he’ll be taking you out tonight but perhaps had omitted the part about skipping class today.
Starting from the convenience store during your highschool years, the place you guys first met, the same place your story started to unfold really.
Walking around the neighborhood hand in hand, two college kids who were finally getting this much needed break from everything else.
The day spent with him was slowly getting by, being close with Seungwoo, hearing him laugh, his smile, the soft and sudden kisses most of the time, just everything was making you realize how much you love him, just when you thought you couldn’t love him much more, he had proved you wrong.
“What’s wrong?” He whispered with you in his arms, cuddling at the back of the pick up truck. Mattresses and pillows all around the back, night had fallen and both were you now cuddling with the makeshift fort.
Shaking your head as you keep the smile while he pulls you close looking down at you too. Months since the last time he held you like this, 8pm still and he didn’t want the day to end.
“When you ran away from me yesterday...” He started off again nuzzling his face on your neck this time as you could feel him hold you tighter. “...that was the first time you ever left me like that... and.. it scared me” He whispered unable to face you. “and after that, I couldn’t get you out of my mind, I was so confused but most of all scared. We haven’t been talking a lot for a while and at some point yesterday, I started thinking what ifs. ‘what if she’s growing tired of me’, ‘what if she thinks I don’t love her anymore?’, ‘what if she actually leaves me because of this or that’. I didn’t want to think... no, I couldn’t see a life without you. Maybe I’m just being over dramatic I just didn’t want to loose you”
His confession made you press your lips together, how many times was he going to make you cry today out of the overwhelming feeling of loving him and being loved by him?
Gazing at each other softly, slowly leaning in as both eyes flutter close, his lips on yours moving softly the corners tugging up as you couldn’t help but let out small giggles once he pulls away to plant a few more pecks.
“I love you” he says in a way that seemed like it was meant for only you to hear, but that didn’t matter. It didn’t matter even if he wouldn’t shout it out loud infront of others, what mattered was that, he says he loves you and proves it.
“Running away with you was the best thing I’ve ever done since school started”
Laughing over his words, nuzzling against him further.
“This time, I promise to really make time for you” His nose on your cheek as the smile not once leaving your lips.
“I really really wow, very  very heol, just love you with all my heart, mind and soul”
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I LOVE PINK PEONIES AND PINK ROSES OKAY : ((((( and pink carnations asfjakfha
its not as fluffy as I would have wanted it to be. uGh,
I do not encourage skipping school oki : )))))
---
an anon requested for a jinyoung fuckboy scenario but didn’t state which jinyoung. I did a poll but no one answered so.... :c I might write a woo jinyoung fuckboy scenario next.
and chapter 3 for tadhana soon!
- admin e
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minimin1993 · 5 years ago
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S/M 8
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Warning: None
Once Min got finished changing she excitedly ran out of the bathroom seeing Sebastian lay on her hotel bed waiting for her.
“Ready?” He said sitting up smiling at her.
“Yes! I miss you the last month, it's not the same without you.” Min said slipping on her nike shoes. 
“I miss you too Princess, come on New York awaits before you fly back to Korea in a week and start promoting again.”  
“Oh jeez don’t remind me, I am officially on Vacation mode.” Min said as they leave her hotel room. 
“Come here, it's going to be cold, it’s December after all.” Sebastian said fixing her scarf making her giggle.
“Did you forget I live in Korea for the past few years and it snows there.” She said hooking her arm with his as they walk down the night streets of New York seeing all the Christmas decorations. 
“Yeah I kind of forgot that a little.” He said chuckling seeing the smoke coming out of his mouth.
“Is the Rockefeller Christmas tree close by? I really want to take some pictures there before I leave.” Min asked excitedly. 
“Its within walking distance, we could go after dinner.” 
“Okay, what did you have in mind?” 
“Pizza?” Both said at the same time as they both starts to laugh. 
“Pizza it is, New York is known for their pizza anyways.” Sebastian said as the walk to the Pizza place that was known for their food. 
 Once they both settled into the booth and started eating, Min moaned at how good the pizza is.
“Dam I am going to miss food like this when I go back to korea.” She said stuffing her face. 
“Oh yeah you said you guys have different food standards over there.” Sebastian said eating his pizza.
“Yeah, even McDonald taste different. How do you think we get to stay skinny?” She said jokingly. 
“You mean borderline anorexic.” 
“True the korean girls are pretty skinny there, and the idol world is worst. We got to stay within a weight frame. I am happy my entertainment allows my group to be more on the fit aspect then skinny, thats Tiffany group image. Since my group is a mixed race group its alot easier.” 
“Do you ever plan to move back to America?” Sebastian asked out of nowhere making Min stop midbite to think.
“To be honest. I really do not know. I am still in contract with my entertainment for the next 3 and a half years, but if the Marvel movies go well I might move back here. Why?” She said 
“I am just curious, you seem to enjoy America a lot but your on the other side of the world. What made you go over there anyways? I don’t think I ever asked, all I remember is you telling me is you are from San Francisco.” 
“Blame Tiffany, she influenced me since I was little to like everything Korean and her family accepted me as their own so it was natural that we both audition together. And somehow we both got accepted together. To be honest though I am happy we weren’t in the same group though. Her group is too strict for me. But hey if Tiffany didn’t influence me I would have never auditioned for Marvel and get casted as Linda which leads to meeting you.” She said proudly.
“Weren’t your family sad when you left?” Sebastian asked making Min choke on her food causing him to jump up to help her before handing her water. 
“Are you okay?” Sebastian asked trying hard not to laugh.
“Yeah, let's go see the Tree, I am excited.” She said changing the subject standing up but Sebastian stops her. 
“Min whats wrong?” 
“Nothing come on let's go.” She said with a sad look on her face trying to stand up again 
 The moment they walked to the Rockefeller Tree Min was staring at it in awe but Sebastian can’t seem to shake the sad feeling he was getting from her before he heard sniffing, turning to see Min trying to discreetly wipe her tears.
“Princess what’s wrong?” Sebastian asked stopping in front of her placing both hands on her shoulders seeing her shake her head refusing to look up. “Princess?” 
“Sebastian please let it go.” Min said finally looking up at him with such a painful look on her face making his heart clench before pulling her into a hug. 
“I am sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.” 
“No it’s not you, you didn’t know.” She said.  
“Do you want to tell me?” 
“Lets just say, I don’t have a family.” She said quietly crying into his chest.
“That’s not true. You know why?” Sebastian said pushing her arm length to look at her face still holding her making her look up at him shaking her head.  
“You have us now, me, Chris, Tiffany, and your kpop crew. We are your family okay? Don’t forget that.” Sebastian said wiping away her tears placing a kiss on her forehead. 
“Come on, I know a place with really good hot chocolate then I can teach you how to Ice Skate.” Sebastian said grabbing her hand and walking away to the hot chocolate stand making Min giggle sadly. 
“How are you so sure I don’t know how to Ice Skate?” Min joked following him to the hot chocolate stand. 
“I don’t, just hoping so I can be a badass on the rink.” 
“Pft, you wish. Just to let you know I am actually a pro at Ice Skating, I use to do compe….” Min started but stopped not wanting to go deep into the subject.
“A pro huh? Then you gotta show me then.” Sebastian said after catching her stopping herself from finishing the sentence and decided not to talk about it. 
 The pair had lots of fun the next few days going Ice Skating (which she schooled him), clubbing and ate lots of food while having movie marathons. But the week passed by way to quickly for their likings the next thing they know it he was dropping her off at the airport. 
“Well I am going to miss having you with me.” Sebastian said hugging her.
“I know I am going to miss you like crazy too, but hey you could always watch my performance on Youtube. The next few months will fly by really quickly, the next thing we know it will be the movie’s press tour and premiere watch.”
“True and you will be filming again after that.” Sebastian said looking at her. 
“Mmhmm, I honestly can’t wait to meet RDJ and Scarlett. God dam my woman crush on her is strong.” Min said day dreaming of Scarlett making Sebastian laugh as he nudges her head playfully.
“You are something else I swear. It's almost time for your flight princess.” Sebastian said looking at his watch that Min had gifted him for his birthday. 
“Oh before I forget I got something for you for Christmas.” Sebastian said pulling out a box from his pocket. 
“Hey unfair, you said no presents…” Min said pouting. 
“Yeah you can’t give me a present because your crazy ass spent over 4 grand on this watch for me.” He said waving the watch in her face making her giggle.
“Hey you deserve it.” She said sticking her tongue out. 
“Uh huh, don’t open it until you get situated on the plane okay?” Sebastian said 
“Fine fine. I’ll see you in a few months, Sebastian, I am going to miss our piggyback rides.” Min said pulling him into a hug. 
“Uh huh, I am going to miss you too.” He said placing a kiss on her forehead making her giggle before she let him go walking over to security check. Sebastian stood there watching her until she passes through Security and she turns back and waves at him.
“BTW I lied, I hid your Christmas present in your kitchen. Have fun looking for it, message me when you find it.” Min said loudly giving him 2 thumbs up making the other passenger laugh at her as Sebastian stood there in shock before laughing.
“You are something else Princess.” He replied shaking his head at her. 
“Ehh, bye Sebby.” She said shrugging her shoulders cutely before blowing him an air kiss. 
 Once Min got settled into her first class flight seat she pulled out Sebastian gift to her for Christmas, when she opened it she gasped seeing a beautiful Sapphire Key Necklace.
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Meanwhile Sebastian had got home and started to look around his kitchen only to find his gift hidden behind her Captain Crunch cereal she’s been eating at his apartment making him chuckle. Once he opened it he finds a Hugo Boss Trifold Wallet. 
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 Ding.
Sebby (>^-^)> 
    Found it. You are a dork princess. Thank you. 
MinniePrincess ^.^ 
    I am glad you found it, took you long enough.
    And thank you for this beauty
Min texted as she sends a picture of herself wearing the necklace to him. 
 True to word the pair had kept up communications at least once a week. The moment Min landed back in korea her schedule has been through the roof preparing for the end of the year MAMA performance plus multiple comeback performances. Min been religiously wearing the necklace that Sebastian had given her unless she was on stage and it clashed with her outfit which rarely happens. 
During February on Min birthday pictures floated around the internet of her holding hands and being very cozy with her SHinee's Jonghyun and their entertainment released an official statement confirming the relationship before Min posted an official picture of the pair on her instagram of Jonghyun giving Min a kiss on the cheek. When Min told Sebastian that they were together, he was through the roof screaming 'I knew it, I knew it was going to happen and tell Tiffany she owes me $20' making Min laugh as her friends were making bets on when they would get together.
Min relationship with Jonghyun never got in the way of her close friendship with Sebastian which she was happy for. A couple more months flew by and the next thing you know it Min was once again packing her bags to start filming of the new 'The Avengers.' 
0 notes
charmanderxerneas · 7 years ago
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1-50 all of them
Oh boy
1. I’m wearing a grey t shirt with mustaches on it and jeans
2. I love you silly
3. No you’re the first person I’ve ever dated and since it’s been going for a couple years and we haven’t broken up yet it means no
4. I’m about 4 and a half feet tall I think maybe probably
5. I weigh 80-100 pounds i am a smol
6.I want a lesbian flag tattoo
7. I already have my ears pierced and i dont think I want anything else
8.There are so many otps I’ll just have to pick a few: Rupphire lapidot zadr suitloon and payjay
9. Steven Universe
10.Imagine Dragons but I mostly listen to video game music and that’s like the only band I know
11. I miss having alot of friends and being productive
12. Right now it’s The Gospel of Dismay” by Dagames omg its amazinggggg
13. 14
14. Aquarius
15. Brown
16. “Is that Irken equipment you’re using? That’s Tak’s ship you’re sitting in, isn’t it?” “Yes it is, Zim, it fell from-” ”Isn’t it!?!?” “I SAID IT WAS!!! Man, you have a problem with listening, Zim.” “ISN’T IT?!!!!?”
17. uhhh i don’t know anyone.... does rebecca sugar work?
18.purple
19.loud
21. tumblr
22. like 5 minutes
23.10 minutes
24.yes you were there
25.red hair (its really cute)
26.mean personality
27. monophobia and the dark i have to sleep with the light on
28. asshats on tumblr
29. about an hour or so ago
30. in 5th grade pokemon x and y was new and awesome, and i made a scratch account, combining the names of my favorite starter and my favorite legendary. i’ve used the same username ever since
31. harry potter
32. gospel of dismay i listened to it because i had to put it for my favorite song
33.my little pony
34. you when we had that google hangouts chat in the middle of the night
35. i dont have a phone, but the last person i texted using my mom’s phne was my brother’s friend max, he’s pretty cool and we’re kinda friends but i think he thinks im annoying as all hell
36.tacos
37. your house so we can cuddle
38.my room
39. YOU
40.(IM SORRY MY CAPS LOCK KEY GOT STUCK AGAIN :() 2 WEDNESDAYS AGO WHEN WE LAST SAW EACH OTHER
41. (yay i fixed it ^^) yesterday with that asshat on deviantart but they apologized so its fine
42.blue >////
43. grey
44. blue
45.no
46. uuhhhh i think it was soccer a couple weeks ago in pe or something???? idk
47.uhh i think it was me singing along the mlp theme song when i was binging the 7th season
48. i’ve never done a prank call ever
49. 2 wensdays ago with you
50. the imitation game
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sarahjane0886 · 8 years ago
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The Road to Us 1
Book 1 - Can I Trust You With My Heart - Chapter 1 - Questions & Long Talks (This series will have 4 Books, each spanning the different segments of their journey, With the exception of the final piece of the final book, this is completely written. Enjoy!) 
The past 6 months had been filled with the hectic schedule of Season 18 of DWTS, summer obligations and Sway. The group had two weeks before Season 19 cast announcements were made. Peta had opted to stay for a few extra days after Sway to spend some time with Nicole. It had been awhile since she had gotten some one on one girl time with her best friend. They spent the first few days hanging out doing a bunch of nothing just catching up. On the fourth day Nicole had two work meetings that she needed to attend so she left Peta to her own devices promising she'd be back for dinner. Peta was just coming out of the shower when she heard her phone signal she had a text.
'Hey, I heard you were still in town and wondered if you'd get lunch with me? I wanted to talk to you about something.' Peta flopped down on the edge of the bed as she read Maks's text over and over and over. She wasn't sure how to respond. After their nasty breakup which left her trying to repair her heart for months, she was leery of time alone with him. Sure they had done Season 18 together, danced in Sway together, as well as a couple other appearances, but as much as Peta knew what her heart wanted she wasn't sure she could take letting their friendship go beyond professional levels again. She decided she'd dry her hair first before answering him. Once she was done she had made up her decision.
'Sure, let me know what time and where.' She said as she hoped she wasn't making a mistake.
'How about that little cafe on 7th and West? In like a half hour? I can come to Nicole's or meet you there?'
'That works, umm its up to you on where you're meeting me tho.'
'I'll meet you at Nicole's, we can walk there.'
'Sounds good, see you in a half hour.' Peta chucked her phone on the bed and began to scurry around figuring out what she was wearing and her hair and makeup. At one point she scolded herself for wanting to look nice for him but convinced herself she just wanted to look nice in general. Eventually she settled for a black over-sized t-shirt that fell off her shoulder, denim shorts, a long colored necklace and her black ankle sandals. She did her makeup quick and simple and waited in the living room for Maks to buzz in. When he did she met him down in the lobby.
"You look nice." He said as he leaned into kiss her check, noticing her flinch slightly before letting him give his usual greeting.
"Thank you, you too." Peta smiled as her nerves hit an all time high.
"Let's head on out." Maks said opening the door for her and leading her out. They began walking down the street in silence and Peta suddenly got nervous that this was gonna be awkward as all get out.
"So you have any hopes for a specific partner this season?" Maks said breaking the silence.
"No not really, I mean I obviously would like someone who was willing to work and be a good asset to the show but there's no one in particular that I'm really pushing for. And further more we don't even know they are calling me back yet."
"What? Are you serious? They'd be crazy to not call you back right now. You're like the hottest most popular girl on there."
"Thanks but I think a lot of people would disagree."
"Like who?"
"Half the fans, they either love me or despise me. It's quite ridiculous at times."
"You just gotta ignore the mean ones, they are just miserable humans who are jealous of your amazingness and your accomplishments."
"You sound like you could be my campaign poster. Shouldn't you be rooting for your brother?"
"I am, but that doesn't mean I can't root for you too. You're my friend and you're part of our family." Peta was ready to say something more but they had arrived at the cafe so they headed and got a table. They discussed the menu options and ended up picking two meals to split cause Peta couldn't make up her mind. They continued to talk easily over their meals keeping their old rhythm between normal topics and teasing the others. Peta felt herself pull back a few times as the voice in her head was fighting the normalcy and comfort she felt in this moment. She'd then immediately sink back into the normalcy. They finished up and Maks went to take the bill.
"Hey let me do my half." Peta protested immediately.
"Let me do this one please, I invited you, you can invite me next time and I'll let you get it."
"How thoughtful of you, but fine that just means you're stuck with my ass again."
"I think I don't mind that. I'll be right back." He said taking the bill and going to the counter to pay. He returned and waited for her to stand up and they headed out. "You wanna walk for a bit?"
"Sure you said you had something to talk to me about?" She said quietly.
"Yeah, let's go down to that park down the block and we'll hang there for a bit if that's okay." Peta agreed and they headed their in silence. Maks' nerves escalated because of what he wanted to talk to her about. Peta's head was spinning at what he wanted to ask her. Finally they got to the park and found a bench away from the chaos of the families, children and everything.
"Sooo...." Maks trailed off as his nerves got the best of him.
"Yes..." As she pulled her legs up on the bench and tucked into her self.
"I'm going back out to LA for the fall and I'm going to start living out there for a good majority of my time."
"That's great news, do you have stuff going on out there? Any jobs?"
"Well yeah a couple small things. But that's not what I wanted to talk to you about."
"Okay well what is it?" She said as she began to fiddle with a loose string on her shirt.
"I miss you...I miss us." Maks blurted out.
"Uhhh...." Peta trailed off as she looked at him. He jumped in quickly trying to cover up the ridiculous way he blurted that out.
"I know I have no right to ask this because I hurt you tremendously but the past two years without you have been horrible. I should have never left you the way I did and I miss everything about us, everything about you. The way you giggle, the way you snuggle in one last time before you fall asleep, and the way you fiddle when you're nervous, kinda like you're doing right now."
She froze and moved her hands to her lap, clasping them together.
"So like I said I know I have no right to ask you this but I was wondering if maybe I could have another chance with you, with us." Peta just stared at him as a million things raced through her mind.
"Maks...I don't...I can't....I need a minute." She stood up and walked away as tears filled her eyes. She shook her head as a trail of memories ran through her head from the night they broke up.
Peta was sitting in the living room waiting on Maks to come down for dinner. They had made plans to go out that night, wanting to celebrate on their own before the craziness of Valentines Day started. She had on a deep red dress with black heals and she had curled her hair. She was settled on the couch. She finally heard footsteps and stood up to look at her boyfriend. To her surprise he was still in sweats and a t-shirt.
"I can't do this anymore." He said looking at her.
"Do what anymore?" Peta said getting nervous. They had been fighting alot lately but she thought they had fixed everything.
"Us, you, this. I can't do it anymore." He said coldly.
"So you're dumping me?"
"That's usually what that means." He said as he glared at her.
"Just like that?!" She yelled at him.
"Just like that."
"You're not even going to give me a reason." She said as she tried to hold her composure."
"Well I don't really have to but it's clear that we aren't on the same page with anything. I want to move on with my life and career and I can't have you holding me down."
"Cause I do that?"
"You do if you're not on the same page as me, you're more interested in your spot on the show and all that. I want a family and I want to move away from the show. I can't do that with you.
"I never said I didn't want a family!"
"You did, when we talked about it. You don't want one."
"I don't want one right now! Maks I'm 26 years old! For god sakes, I have so much more in life to do before I have a family and children. That doesn't mean I don't want one a few years from now, just not right now."
"Whatever Peta. I don't care anymore. I'm done, with you, with us, with our fighting, and our different places in life."
"What in the hell do you want me to do right now?" She got pissed. She was scheduled to be in NYC for 2 more days before she had to fly back out to LA.
"I don't know. I don't care. I'm going to the gym. I'll be back in two hours. That should give you enough time to figure it out and to not be here when I get back." And with that he left her standing in the middle of his living room to figure out her life.
She shook her head as she came back to the present and noticed that he had moved beside her. He went to touch her and she pulled away.
"Don't Maks." She moved away and crossed her arms.
"I...okay." He said as he put his head down.
"Do you have any idea of how much you hurt me that night? I thought we were okay, I thought we were getting back on track and I was excited and then you came down and you were so mean and cold. I had no idea."
"I'm so..."
"Save it. Sorry isn't going to fix that one Maksim. You have no idea what it took for me to get past that. None."
"I may have talked to Nicole and Sharna."
"Hearing and seeing it are two different things. If I hadn't have had them and your brother and Kelly. I don't know where I'd be right now."
"I was selfish and arrogant and I didn't think about how it would affect you. I was only concerned with myself."
"You think?" She snapped at him.
"I'm different now though Peta. I promise. The past two years...they've changed me."
"How in the hell am i supposed to believe that? You think that one season on the show where we both have partners and a round a Sway where we dance together and I'm just going to trust you again?!"
"No, well, I don't know. I just wanted to ask for a chance, pretty..."
"Don't! You lost the right to call me that that night."
"You're right. I did. But will you let me please try to earn that right back?"
"Maks, I don't know if I can do that again. I can't get hurt like that again." The weight of the entire day fell upon her shoulders right then and she sank to the ground and pulled her knees into her chest. He knelt down beside her, sitting there quietly while he waited for her to collect herself. She finally looked up at him not sure what to say in that moment.
"Can I say something?" He asked quietly.
"Go ahead." She nodded.
"Okay, first, anything I said, about us, do you miss it? Do you still feel it? Aside from the fear I've put in you, is any of that still in there?" He said softly. If she said no that would be the end. He wouldn't push her for something she didn't feel anymore. She looked at him trying to decide if she should answer truthfully or just lie and be done with all this.
"Yes...but Maks..." He stopped her then putting up his hand. She stopped her murmuring and just looked at him.
"I know you can't go through that again. And you should have never had to in the first place. I should have never done that to you. And I know it doesn't fix it but I'm sorry. I truly honestly as much as I can be I'm sorry. Can we maybe just try to go slow? Be friends, hang out, do lunch dinner, talk on the phone sometimes, text each other when we want or need but nothing more than that until you're sure you're ready. Nothing else until I've proven to you I changed and that I won't do that to you again."
"What if it doesn't work?" She said softly as she looked at her toes.
"What if it does?" Maks said as he moved a little closer to her noticing she didn't flinch or pull away this time.
"I don't know Maks, I don't know." She leaned back against the tree as tears filled her eyes.
"Hey, P, don't cry."
"I don't want to. I promise. I really didn't think this was going to come out of your mouth today. I don't know what I really thought you'd want to talk about. It's a lot Maks and bringing back all those feelings. It hurts and I'm scared."
"Of me hurting you?"
"And the opposite, what if we do this and I can't do it and I hurt you?"
"That's a chance I'm willing to take."
"We have to go slow. Like super slow."
"I'm okay with that. You're in charge, you control the pace and if you get uncomfortable then we'll take a step back. You just have to promise you'll tell me if you need to slow down."
"I promise. I'll make sure you know, trust me."
"I do." He smiled at her and she gave him a weak smile back. He stood up and reached his hand out to her to help her up. Once they were standing he asked her another question timidly. "Can I give my friend a hug?"
"I think that would be okay." She smiled as she waited for him to open his arms.
"Come here you." He said as he gently pulled her into his arms.
"Don't hurt me Maks, please?" She whispered into his chest as she sunk into that familiar hug and smell of him.
"I won't Peta, I promise. We've got a long road ahead of us but I promise I will do my very very best to not hurt you."
"Hearing that is good enough for me, now how about we start this new journey with some ice cream?" She said with a tiny twinkle in her eye.
"You and your ice cream, let's go miss." He said as he let her out of his arms and they began to walk out of the park ready to try this again.
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fxikb0ay-blog · 5 years ago
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