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dreaamerwrites · 2 years ago

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[ JEALOUS ]

rating: PG couple: cho guesung x female reader request: "can i ask you to imagine cho gue sung if he gets jealous because of one of the other players?" tags: jealousy, cake, kangin shenanigans, making out in a hotel hallway lol note: reader has had a crush on guesung for a long time. she was starting to wonder if her feelings might be reciprocated while they were apart during the Qatar World Cup, but during a welcome back party for our KNT boys, guesung begins to act very, very strange. /

You realize something is wrong immediately.

You can’t quite put your finger on how you know. He’s standing on the other side of the room, several feet of carpet, appetizers, and rowdy footballers stretching out in the space between you two. Seungho is laughing at his side. Jinsu must’ve cracked a joke, because Guesung appears to be laughing too now. But…

But you can tell something is wrong.

Maybe it’s that tight set to his jaw. (You can see it clench and unclench, an unhappy habit you know he’s been trying to break for months now, per his dentist’s orders.) Or maybe it’s his arms, crossed over his chest. He’s standing broad; feet apart, shoulders squared. He looks half-ready to fight or bolt – and yet, still, he continues to laugh between Jinsu and Seungho. As if everything is fine, as if nothing’s wrong.

His eyes briefly flicker over. They meet yours. You frown at him, trying to ask and convey:

What’s wrong?

Guesung’s expression does not change as he looks away yet again.

“Noona, did you taste this yet?!”

Suddenly a fork comes in line with your vision.

You look to your left, startled. Kangin had been chatting animatedly by your side for the last few minutes but, with Guesung looking so off, you hadn’t been able to pay much attention to the boy. The Mallorca boy smiles down at you with a broad, earnest smile, all teeth and dimples, and you immediately soften.

“No, not yet,” you reply, leaning forward to take the bite of cake he offers to you. It tastes of blueberries and whipped cream. “Are you guys even allowed to eat stuff like this?”

“Of course,” Kangin’s grin grows even wider, a truly impossible feat. “It’s Day 1 of our vacation. I deserve this today. Isn’t it good?!”

The sweetness clings to you, both from the cake and the boy.

“Yes,” you laugh, shaking your head. “It’s very good.”

Pleased, Kangin moves to take another bite for himself now. He’s settled close to you, as he had been for the last hour…

(I’ve missed you, noona! he had exclaimed, as soon as he had found you waiting in the hotel suite, still adding the last finishing touches to the makeshift welcome party you and the rest of the Seoul-based staff had thrown together.

The day had been a hectic one – their flights delayed, the airport erupting into chaos, countless fans lining up outside the hotel where the team had intended to touch base before all going their separate ways. You had been a mess then, hair still up in a sloppy bun, a pile of knotted streamers in your hands. Kangin had nearly tackled you down with a hug regardless.

You should’ve come with us, he had whined, arms still tight around your waist. Qatar wasn’t the same without you!

Over his shoulder, at that moment, you had seen Guesung walk in, face gaunt, eyes tired. He had stopped briefly when he saw the spectacle before him – Kangin hugging you in a wild bear hug, walking you backwards and nearly knocking over a bowl of confetti in the process – before shaking his head and making his way immediately towards the bar cart.)

That had been one hour ago.

And now, Kangin is still pressed into your side, curled up beside you on one of the hotel suite loveseats – and Guesung…

Well, Guesung has still not even come to say hello.

You’re trying very hard not to take it personally. It isn't as if you have any claim on Guesung. He isn't even your boyfriend, after all. You're close of course. You're close with all of them really. But… but Guesung had been different. Had felt different.

Especially over the last few weeks, throughout the World Cup campaign. You two had been talking more than ever. Constant phone calls, constant texts. You had spoken to him more over the last few weeks while he was in Qatar than you had ever before.

(And when he’d fall asleep, mid-sentence, mumbling to you over the phone about just wanting to do well, to make everyone happy, to make you feel proud of him… well, was it wrong for your heart to have flipped at the promise? Was it wrong to start to wonder if, for the first time in years, that perhaps your feelings weren’t so one-sided after all?)

You did well, Guesung. I missed you. I’m proud of you, Guesung. I missed you.

You had had so many things to tell him in-person and yet, now, you can’t even find the courage to approach him from across this very hotel room.

Was it possible for someone to feel far away, even while in the same room? How had he managed to feel even closer, when he had been oceans away before?

“You wanna know a secret, noona?” Kangin suddenly asks.

He’s pressed to your side, radiating a comforting kind of heat that briefly distracts you from how strange Guesung has been all evening.

You force yourself into a brief, small smile before turning to look at Kangin again. He has a small smudge of whipped cream on his Cupid’s bow. He looks as soft, kind, and sweet as ever. A boy, enjoying his cake, just happy to be here at all.

“Sure,” you can’t help but laugh, reaching over to wipe the cream from his lips with your thumb, endeared. He blushes sheepishly at the action, licking at his lips afterwards. This time, you press your shoulder into his instead, laughing teasingly. “What’s the secret, kid?”

This gets him back on track.

Momentarily forgetting his sheepishness, Kangin straightens up, sitting broad in the loveseat with you, shoulder firm against yours. He gives you an owlish, knowing look.

“I’ve been conducting an experiment,” he says, very matter-of-factly.

You raise a brow, licking the icing off your thumb. Kangin doesn’t bat an eye.

“You see, when we were at the airport, some of the hyungs were all making fun of… someone,” he raises a brow right back at you, all swagger now, as if he wasn’t just caught with frosting on his lip. “They all knew you’d be here, waiting for us when we got back, ya’know.”

You’re not quite sure where this is going.

“They were making fun of him, saying that… that someone would probably be soOOOooOo happy to see you,” Kangin hums, clearly pleased with himself. “He tried to deny it the whole trip. Said it wasn’t a big deal. Said he just wanted to see you just like everyone else. Said it wasn’t like that.”

Wasn’t like that. Suddenly your heart is caught in your throat.

“Kangin,” your smile falters.

Kangin’s expression transforms from faux swagger to warm encouragement in a split second. He sets his cake down onto the coffee table and, hands free now, shifts even closer to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder.

“I needed to call bullshit,” he smiles warmly, no malice lacing his words whatsoever. Just pure kindness and laughter. He radiates so much softness that you can’t even admonish him for swearing. “I wanted to make them acknowledge that: nope, this is exactly like that.”

Kangin squeezes your shoulder firmly, never breaking eye contact with you.

“Noona, you deserve someone who will be honest about their feelings. You deserve someone who will be proud to have you in their life and who will fight to keep you always.”

(Just want you to be proud of me, Guesung had murmured sleepily on the fourth night.

His voice had sounded far away on the phone. You had pressed the receiver closer to your ear. You could catch what he said next just barely. It came so soft and sleep found him so quickly after that you wondered if you had dreamt it all.

Just want you to want me too, he had whispered. Just want you.)

“So I started wondering, ya’know. If this guy can’t even be brave enough to tell his friends that he likes you, then will he ever be brave enough to deserve you?” Kangin continues, this time more flippantly than before. His gaze flickers over to the side of your head but he holds you still, does not let you look away. “So I needed to run a little experiment.”

Suddenly Guesung is standing before you.

This time, Kangin lets you look up, look away. Lets you look up into Guesung’s face, to find his expression pinched and unhappy, his big hand brushing Kangin’s off of your shoulder with focused intent.

Guesung grabs your arm and lifts you up and off the couch.

“We’re going,” Guesung grits out. “Now.”

“Guess I know my answer now,” Kangin laughs loudly, a full-bodied laugh. You can see he has some whipped cream still left on his chin, too, that you hadn’t noticed before.

You glance between the young boy and Guesung in confusion – but Guesung doesn’t give you a chance to squeak out another question.

He leaves behind a laughing Kangin and pulls you further and further away, his hand firm on your arm, fingers pressing into your skin as he pulls you through the crowd of people, his steps so wide that you nearly trip over your own feet to keep up with him.

Heungmin is laughing now, just as loudly, and you can see Jinsu and Seungho doubled over in the corner.

Guesung does not spare anyone a second glance.

He does not even spare you a glance until you’re out, finally, standing in the hotel hallway, the suite room slamming closed behind you. Your back hits the wall.

“I’m – what – what’s going on – ” you sputter, Guesung’s hand still tight around your arm. “Guesung, you’re hurting me.”

He drops his hand immediately, as if burned. Still, he does not look at you. He stares down at his hand instead. His chest is heaving and his expression has morphed from frustrated anger to one of disbelief, as he stares down at his palm. He clenches it closed into a fist, his knuckles white.

Just want you to want me too.

“Sorry, I’m – I’m sorry,” Guesung is muttering now, voice low and gravelly. Thick with something uncomfortable. “I shouldn't have – sorry, I grabbed you. I shouldn’t have – ”

You can hear the party even through the thick hotel room door that separates you from the rowdy footballers. You can almost hear Kangin laughing, still.

Be brave, he’d probably tell you.

Be brave, he’d probably tell the both of you in this hallway.

Slowly, you raise your hand to cover Guesung’s closed fist. His hand is so big, compared to yours, that you can barely cover half of it. You raise your other as well. Cradling his fist in both of your hands, you smooth your thumbs over his clenched knuckles. You can feel him shiver at the touch and finally, finally… you buck up the courage to look up.

To look at him.

Guesung stares down at you, towering over you with his height. He blocks out the hotel light behind him, still breathing heavily, shoulders shaking, and, for once, all you can see is him. The hotel room, the laughter, the party: everything fades away. There is only you, and there is only him.

The silence is deafening.

His mouth is pressed into a thin line. His expression is still unreadable, guarded and unhappy, but the beauty mark just below his eye is so endearing that you can’t help but soften, despite yourself.

For the first time that evening, you think you may finally understand what was wrong all along.

I miss you, his eyes seem to scream. I missed you!

You let go of his hand to reach up to cradle his face carefully instead.

“It’s okay,” you whisper into the silence of the hotel hallway. “Don’t be sorry.”

Be brave!

“I missed you too,” you admit quietly.

The change in his expression comes so swiftly that you can barely register it before he crushes you against him. He presses your face into his broad chest and wraps his muscled arms around you tightly, desperately. He holds you so close that your own chest rises and falls with each breath he takes. His breath is warm and harsh against your ear, a faint whine of unhappiness rising up when you wiggle in his arms, trying to free your own arms so that you can wrap them around him. Only when your arms circle his waist does he finally let out a ragged, relieved sigh.

Still, he does not let you go.

“I hated it. All of it,” he mutters into your hair. “Everything in there. I'm sorry. I hated that Kangin was the first one you saw. I hated that he was with you all night. I hated that we didn’t speak and that you didn’t look at me and that you were looking at him and –”

He’s rambling now, all nonsense and tight breaths.

You smooth your hand down his back. Follow the curve and dip of his spine. Rub soothing circles into the base. He seems to melt into you at the touch, though he’s careful not to rest his weight onto you.

You don’t think you’d mind it, really. You tug him closer, still.

“I didn’t know,” you whisper back quietly. “I’m sorry too.”

This stops the rambling.

Guesung seems to go still in your arms. And then, unwillingly, reluctantly, he slowly pulls back. His hands are locked behind your back so neither of you can go very far, but he pulls back just enough to get a better look at your face. You’re not sure what you look like. Your hair feels like a mess, from being pressed up against him just now, and you’re sure you’re flushed as well – but…

But Guesung looks at you like you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

And, damn, if he isn't the most beautiful thing you've ever seen as well.

His mouth is red and his cheeks are flushed. He stares down at you with such intensity that you want to squirm under his gaze, but still he holds you in place. You swallow. His hair has come loose, the pomade softening, and a few strands fall into his forehead. You want to push them back. You want to hold him closer. You want him to…

“You didn’t know?” Guesung asks softly, breaking your train of thought.

You shake your head slowly. He licks his lips. Watches you watch him too.

“You didn’t know that I’ve missed you like hell for the last few months? You didn’t know that the first person I wanted to see after our Portugal match... was you?”

Guesung’s gaze never leaves yours.

This time, you do shiver.

“You wanted to see me first?” you reply shakily, a slight tremor in your voice.

Guesung sweeps one hand up from your waist to the side of your neck. Normally he runs cold, you know, but today he is warm, skin hot against yours. His thumb smooths over the slope of your jaw, the touch purposeful and tender.

“I always want to see you first,” he replies, just as shakily, his voice giving him away.

You cannot hear Kangin laughing anymore. You do not hear anything but the sound of Guesung’s soft voice and your own heart thumping loudly in your chest. It’s time to be brave now.

“Good,” you reply.

You tilt your face up to Guesung. And then, staring into his eyes, you lift yourself up onto your tippy toes, rest your hands on his shoulders, and lean up and into him.

When your lips find his, the first kiss is unbearably soft.

A barely there brush of your lips at first – but then there's a second, and then a third.

By the fourth, Guesung is hungry as he pushes you back further against the wall, one leg slotting between yours, his big hand cupping your cheek to tilt your mouth up and open for him even more.

“Missed you,” you murmur between kisses, his tongue catching your bottom lip. You shiver when his other hand stops at the small of your back, thumb sweeping across the stretch of skin there that appears as your shift lifts just slightly. “So proud of you. ‘M so proud of you. Wanted to tell you all night.”

He shakes in your arms at this, holding you closer, his thigh warm between your legs.

“Proud of me?” he mumbles back, pressing another kiss at the corner of your mouth, nose brushing against yours. “Missed me?”

You nod, dizzy now, breathless as he kisses you in earnest. Your hand finds its way into his hair and you give the strands a light tug, pulling him back slightly. When he tilts back, you can see him clearly now. Mouth wet, pink with your lip balm, his hair even more mussed than before. He’s heaving now, chest rising and falling with each desperate breath.

You can taste that cake still – blueberries and whipped cream clinging to the backs of your teeth – but you can taste Guesung too, you think. You lick your lips.

He seems to melt at the sight.

He sags against you, pressed firmly against you, wedging you between his thighs and the cool wall behind you.

��Did you really?” he leans closer, pressing his forehead to yours.

For someone who just kissed you as if their life depended on it, a flash of uncertainty shines in his eyes.

Oh, Guesung…

You decide to be brave enough for the both of you.

“I did. I’m so proud of you. And I missed you so much,” you answer steadily. Your hand in his hair is gentle. You brush the strands back slowly, carefully. Breathe in his cologne and let yourself get dizzy with it. “Wanted you. So much.”

Guesung looks dizzy himself.

He nudges his nose against yours. You’re sure the position must be uncomfortable for him, towering so high above you but leaning down so that he can reach you, like this. He does not seem to care. The uncertainty in his eyes seems to be fading now.

“Really? You wanted – want me?” he clears his throat. Presses himself closer to you, all heat between your legs, shuddering when your fingers card through his hair, nails grazing the nape of his neck. He tries to laugh shakily. “Even more than Kangin?”

The joke catches you so off guard that you let out a helpless, breathless laugh.

“Is that really a question?” you ask, looking down at the predicament you two are in briefly before looking back up at Guesung. Do you see this right now? is what you should really be asking. Instead, you decide to humor him. “Of course more than Kangin. More than anyone else. Always. I wouldn’t be out here kissing Kangin like this!”

This seems to appease him.

He crowds against you even closer, nuzzling your nose with his, sneaking a quick kiss to your cheek.

“Good,” he murmurs. “Only kiss me like this. Only want me. I know I only want you.”

You know there will be lengthy conversations after this. You know the two of you will need to discuss your feelings properly – will need to iron this out and speak like adults, rather than kiss-drunk kids who want only to be wrapped up in each other’s arms. You know that that will all come...

But for now, you let yourself have this.

Be brave.

“Only want you,” you promise, voice soft. Reassuring. Guesung is warm and solid in your arms.

He is everything you could ask for at that moment.

He is everything you could ask for always.

“I promise.”

Bonus cut:

Several minutes later, after a few more lengthy, hungry kisses:

Guesung fixes his hair, ruffling the strands between his fingers, as he gazes at you thoughtfully. You raise a brow at him, as you readjust your shirt, trying to tuck it back in from where he had pulled it loose.

“What is it?”

He purses his lips, a curious look in his eyes.

“You tasted like… blueberries. Do you always taste like berries?”

You pause.

And then, schooling your expression into the most neutral one you can manage, you sniff: “Did you get to try the cake we got for you guys? It’s blueberries and cream. …Kangin fed me some. Didn’t you see – ”

(Really, you both had tried to straighten yourselves out in vain. What was even the point of trying to straighten out your shirt again?)

You yelp when Guesung reels you back in, big hands immediately grabbing onto your hips as he pulls you closer, staring at your mouth with intent, chasing you for another kiss.

“I’ll kiss it away. Gonna kiss you til you taste like me instead,” he growls roughly, mouth open and wet against yours.

You can only laugh into the kiss in agreement.

#cho gue sung #cho gue sung imagines #no proofreading we die like men #LOL #soccer fanfic

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thoughtfullyluckyperson · 4 years ago

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Hello do you have any vampire Knight fic recs?

I do, nonnie! But they'll mostly be Kaname/Zero fics, that's my VK otp. And mostly long fics since I just love long fics the best. Sorry for the wait, I had to refresh my memory and check my ereader’s fic folder. So, here we go.

Crimson Door, Blood Moon and Secrets in the Dark and all fics of Blackened Wing’s AU universe. I would suggest reading three main fics in this particular order and then reading smaller ones however you please (they’re mostly missed scenes and side stories and they don’t impact the main plot much; my favorite is Five Hundred Miles, aka the jungle survival story). Anyone who had read something in VK probably had already read this, since it’s the fic(s) that kinda formed kaze fandom. But still, they should be here just in case someone somehow missed them.

That’s a canon divergence AU that forks from the canon on rather early chapters, so many latest canon plot twists don’t happen here (Kaname is not Kuran the Ancestor but young orphaned Kuran heir and Yuuki is not a vampire/his relative, from big ones) and many things are also unique to this universe. Which makes it so delightful, but also sucks because you won’t find it anywhere else. And I kinda like how this universe unfolds more than canon one. It’s pretty slowburn at first and then has plenty of smut later on (and what a smut! if you need a finest vampire smut, it’s the right choice, everything that could be done with one’s neck/teeth/blood is done here and what couldn’t is done too lol). Relationship is mostly m/m, but the story goes through f/m/m threesome phase at some point (there is no f/m/m smut in major fics but it’s present in a couple of smaller ones). I personally hate threesomes tbh, but here is the rare case when I don’t mind, it adds to the story and isn’t so big too. “Secrets in the Dark” is unfinished but the main plot is already over at that point, so it doesn’t leave you hanging. Though there are unresolved mysteries left for a sequel that didn’t happen, but you can read it as finished too. Sorry for babbling but I just love it. It’s not without flaws ofc, don’t let me raise your expectations sky-high, but read it if you didn’t.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5428521/1/Hold-Me-Now-It-s-My-Turn it’s a kaze sequel to Zero/Yuuki long fic but you can read it on its own. At least, I did so. It’s a family drama set like 30 years into future. Zero marries human Yuuki, they get their happily ever after, but after a few dozen happy years Yuuki dies from an illness. Zero doesn’t really have reason to live anymore, and he doesn’t want to be Kaname’s charity case but Kaname can’t let him go. So there is a widower-with-kids Zero and Kaname who pined after him for years.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4600471/1/The-Other-Half-Of-Myself from the same author as the previous (they have some smaller fics too, look in their profile) That’s a very peaceful undramatic unproblematic school romance, as sweet as it can get. “Kimi Ni Todoke KaZe edition, the fic“ basically lmao, if you ever watched KNT. A tad boring for me personally because it’s so undramatic, but nice.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5629351/1/Unholy-Matrimony A very popular fic with an accidental-marriage-in-Vegas trope and then some spy shenanigans and mad scientists etc. Kinda a bit OOC-ish for my taste but enjoyable enough read anyway. There is a sequel too, it’s unfinished but close to it, so it won’t leave you all frustrated.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5053495/1/The-Stranger Total AU, Wild West, Zero, Ichiru and Yuuki are orphaned siblings living in the middle of nowhere and one day they find a wounded stranger. Of course they have to save him, of course there is something wrong with him (as in, he’s not quite human), of course there are people searching for him and they’re not nice... Here is an author I feel conflicted about - on one hand, it’s a quite good author, on the other, our kinks/squicks differ a lot and ff.net doesn’t have tag system so you never really know when something squicky is going to jump on you. But I remember “The Stranger” being mostly ok in that regard so I can recommend it (don’t read the mini side story tho if you aren’t into incest; oh, and Kaname is an asshole but what’s new). From what I’ve also read of this author (because when there is not enough content, you get less picky and more brave heh), “A strange relationship“ has rather abrupt angst ending but you can kinda fix it in your head, “The right to choose“ sent me to Pluto with a pro-life stance of some characters even when I was ready for the forced pregnancy trope, “A place for us“ has various incest, infidelity, gerontophilia, rape, everyone-just-wants-Zero and so on. So beware. But if your kinks will align or you’re not easily squicked, then you find a lot of decently written multichapter and complete stuff to read.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5596000/1/His-Eyes I remember it as a classic Cross Academy kaze story. You know, with patrols, uniforms, screaming Night Class fangirls, full moons, jumping from windows, secret meetings in a forest, exchanging blood for favors, falling in love with a rival... Nothing groundbreaking but I remember liking it quite a bit. Though now the notes say that the author edited smut out to save it from ff.net or something and I’m not sure if it’s worth reading in this state. I have an old unedited version saved in epub format tho, so if you’re desperate, probably it wouldn’t be a giant crime to share it.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5318440/1/Beginnings, https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5421652/1/First-Times, https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5709621/1/Pleasure-Dome A trilogy of non-vampire AU oneshots I remember being decent. Kaname and Zero are university students who meet in a nightclub.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7359668/1/Unexpectedly-Close-To-The-Edge it’s most likely abandoned and I typically don’t like to read abandoned stories and not sure about recommending them. But this one kinda stands pretty far from typical roads and I was intrigued enough to try. It’s pretty dark so be careful, there are rather brutal scenes of torture, rape and pedophilia I had to skim through (not between kaze and not shown as something good, but still). Timeskip after Yuuki leaves with Kaname, a rewrite of vampire society, purebloods are monsters and it’s shown in all gore-y details, Rido is alive (again), Yuuki is dead, Kaname is dying, there are intrigues of various levels, Zero is in the middle of this shit storm as a burnout bitter hunter mistreated by the hunter association. It’s like “VK meets Berserk” or so. I would’ve really liked to know how it ended, huh.

King's Gambit, Knight's Tour A short post-canon character study, it kinda strikes the nerve for me. Can recommend the author in general, I like their other fics too.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31540631 One more of theirs, Kaname is a Hannibal-esque serial killer and Zero is his grumpy flatmate

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8173330/1/Servant This fic needs more love. A well crafted story which takes all the canon into consideration and works with parts that are not so exploited in fandom. AU where it’s Kaname who turns Zero and it changes the flow of story in interesting ways (Zero doesn’t meet Yuuki etc). It’s angsty though, and the ending is kinda intertwined with the canon too. (Oh, here it is on ao3)

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7804163/1/My-Eternity Another unfinished one but I hope it’s a very slow in-process and not abandoned. Very slowburn AU where Kaname slowly grows fond of Zero instead of Yuuki in their childhood and it changes things with Rido etc.

Some of these fics I had read pretty long ago though so I’m not sure if I’d like them right now or not. And it’s an old fandom, not very alive recently, so old fics tend to have certain tropes or manner of writing etc. Sorry if it’d be the case for you. But I hope you’ll find something you like :)

(Also, if you’ll be searching for more, ff.net is your friend (albeit a cruel one, since, well, no tags). The majority of VK fics are archived there since ao3 was not a thing back when the fandom was most active. It’s a thing with many old fandoms. But you don’t have to read stuff on ff.net itself, it’s quite uncomfortable for longer reads. There are apps for downloading fics from there as epub/mobi/txt/pdf files and reading offline on your device. I personally use FanfictionDownloader for PC, and here or here you can do it online too).

UPD: Here is an old rec thread where other pairings can be found too.

#vampire knight #kanazero #kaname x zero #kanamezero #fic recs #Kaname Kuran #Zero Kiryuu #hmm maybe I forgot something and add more later #kanze #kaze #dammit I'm not even sure about the right ship tag #tumblr is oddly void of content #it always was kaze but it's too short as a tag and has too much unrelated content

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waitmyturtles · 2 years ago

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Couple of thoughts on a beautiful summer Tuesday.

1) New tumblr-er here: I couldn’t have ever thought that my EAW post on Young-woo and Jun-ho would get so much love. Feeling so happy and full that people are understanding what I was grasping with Young-woo and Jun-ho. Here’s to hoping that the EAW writers continue to present Young-woo’s agency via Jun-ho as a total and unspoken given (because that’s the way it should be in society!).

2) In-between waiting for the EAW new episodes, absorbing KinnPorsche, and totally, TOTALLY missing Old Fashion Cupcake and new Kinou Nani Tabeta material, I did something cute and crazy!

If you’ve read the English scanlation of the OFC second volume, you see that Nozue-san does something cute and crazy with cooking -- he adds doubanjiang (the jiang jiang sauce) to nikujaga. I LOVE TO COOK, and learned basically everything I know about Japanese cooking through KNT. Nikujaga (meat and potato stew) is generally supposed to be more on the sweet side, rather than spicy, but Nozue-san throws a curveball by adding Togawa’s favorite panda sauce.

Soooooooooo, what did I do -- I combined Shiro-san’s recipe for nikujaga [from Volume 2 of the manga, using tsuyu (noodle sauce) as the main seasoning] and adding Nozue-san’s doubanjiang to it. And holy shit, it was amazing! And my kids loved it (I didn’t add too much jiang jiang, it would have been too spicy for the kids). The kids generally love nikujaga because it’s sweet, but my older one really liked the slightly more savory version.

In summary: COOK FROM YOUR FAVORITE MANGAS, because like, you’ll be happy, and if you have progeny, they’ll be happy, too!

#old fashion cupcake #kinou nani tabeta #extraordinary attorney woo #cooking #why yes i use mangas more than cookbooks

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onlysmon · 5 years ago

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May-20- 2020 3:45 am

I wish you all the best in life you'll always always have a special place in my heart. I've known you through all my different experiences in life, we've been through so much together. Today i'm ending a journey and starting another, and you're still here. i just want whatever is best for us, either we are together or not. I'm going to always remember you, you'll never leave my prayers. Things might not be the best right now but i'm so thankful to have someone like you. I want things to get better i want to be able to tell you how much i love and care about you, how much i think about you, i want to talk about all the different things that happen throughout our day, make amazing memories with you, i want to make your days just to see your smile, and i want to be able to send this to you without thinking that you might not care this much about me. But as long as you are going to be happy with or without me i just want everything thats good for you. I love you so much smsm <3 i miss our calls i really do, i miss your laugh and everything, i even miss being jealous yom t7awl tnrfzni, w3 7ta shtgt yom knt tz3lni w a9e7 w enta matdry bs b3dain tgoly a7la klam. i miss sitting in the corner with my teddy w nsolf f pubg w agolk 89ayd :( wayd wayd wayd mtwlha w 93b a3wd nfsi enh mabtrd hl ayam. 6b3n a9e7 w aktb w ad3e w akml 9ya7

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writeanapocalae · 5 years ago

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Nano Last Updated 12/11/2012 Part 45

Everything hurt. Everything always hurt but he just didn’t notice it before. His leg was throbbing in pain and nothing he normally did was making it stop. He’d taken too many pills to cover the pain but they weren’t kicking in fast enough and they never worked anyway. He tried lying down differently, but that just made it worse. He tried walking on it but stopped when he feared he would wake the neighbors up with his swearing. He ended up on the couch, where he spent most of his days, drinking straight from an old bottle of Jameesan’s Whiskey that his sister had given him the Christmas before. He was watching some infomercial on a squirt bottle full of water that was supposed to make plants grow faster, but he was sure it was just water, as he massaged the aching limb.

His shoulders hurt too but he ignored them, they weren’t as bad, neither was his back although it was begging for his attention, and his arm, and his head. The pills and the whiskey would take care of them soon enough, or so he hoped, and if his leg stopped throbbing he would fall asleep where he was.

In three hours it would be 7am and Terrin would come by with breakfast and yell at him for sleeping on the couch. She thought he was lazy, not going to bed and sleeping there but that wasn’t it. It hurt too much and sometimes he couldn’t sleep there. He would come out here and fall asleep in front of the soap operas and infomercials. He never told her how much it hurt, he couldn’t tell her, he didn’t want her to worry.

He’d buy another bottle of whiskey the next day and some beer and whatever else he could carry home. He had been saving the whiskey, he didn’t want to waste it, but it was a hard night and his leg wasn’t giving him any sort of a break.

He had drunk half of the bottle by the time it overtook him and he was asleep, the ever changing light of the television screen bouncing off of the walls like a lighting display. If anyone in the apartment across the street looked over they would think him a nutjob, staying up until four in the morning watching such crap but he was sure no one was looking out their windows at this time of night. Even if there was someone they would be used to his ever glowing apartment by now.

His dreams were short and segmented and full of the work he would never be able to do again. He did not remember any of them as they passed but when he woke up to a loud knocking on the door he remembered a feeling that had been present throughout. A feeling of bitter disappointment. He knew he had let his father down.

He groaned as he became more cognizant and tried to get up before the door opened by Terrin had already pushed her own spare key into the lock and let herself in. She glared at him as she entered, her busty self wrapped in a thick black coat.

“Jace, did you sleep on the couch again?” she glared at him.

“Good morning.” He sighed.

“Why don’t you sleep in your bed?” she was gesticulating, her arms wild as she pointed back towards his room, “It’s twenty feet! Surely you’re not so lazy you can’t walk twenty feet to your bed!”

“Good to see you too.”

Her dark eyes fell onto the half empty bottle of whiskey. She lifted it up in her hands and stared at it again before resuming her angry accusations, “And you were drinking? That’s good, that’s healthy! What’s wrong with you, Jace? It’s like you don’t want to get better!”

He stared at her. Sure she had said those words before, but never like that, never so serious. He did want to get better, of course he did. His stupid leg had cost him his job, the only thing he’d ever wanted. He was a police officer, just like his dad, and now that was all gone. All gone because he had to get distracted, had to get bitten, and then in the surgery they took too much of the muscle in his leg and the nerves were all wired wrong and he wasn’t supposed to work again. He’d never be back on the field, never make his father proud of him, because he was busted and broken.

“I haven’t missed a day of therapy.” His voice was quiet and he couldn’t look her in the eyes. The words didn’t hurt as much as they had when she first said it was a joke but this time there was too much anger in them. She was disgusted in him.

He was a waste of space, a mess, a slob. He was nothing that his sister wanted him to be. He was useless now that he was broken. There was no point to him existing if he couldn’t do anything, if he was just a disabled man with a sniper rifle pointed out of his window.

He felt a bit like Jimmy Stewart in Rear Window, his leg useless, nothing better for him to do than spy on the neighbors. He glanced over at it, collecting dust at the window. It was a KNT-308, black and thin and gorgeous, so comfortable against him that it was hard for him to see things close up. It seemed wrong to see without a scope. Things were small, far away. She was starting to collect dust, just like him.

“And does your therapist know you’re sleeping on the couch watching tv?” Terrin put her clenched fists on her tiny little waist. Jace looked her over, at her strength and beauty, her dark skin, her round red lips, her black hair cascading down her face in waves. He didn’t understand how she could be single; he’d seen how men stared at her.

“Yes.” He shrugged, taking his eyes away.

“And?”

“He says it isn’t good for me.” He admitted.

“And the drinking?”

“Same.”

“What are you doing?” she closed the space between them, looking down at him. He was pulling himself off of the couch, a bit shakily, looking for his cane. He always lost it when he traveled in the night. “You’re exacerbating the healing process.”

That wasn’t her, that wasn’t how she normally spoke. She had heard it from the doctors and his therapist probably and she liked to use it against him. That fit her just well. She was a strong person, a bit pushy, and she was good at getting under his skin.

“Sometimes it hurts.” He shrugged, “I come out here and try to get over it and end up falling asleep.”

#old writing #my writing #nano 2012

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tobiasfarnal · 4 years ago

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Against Medical Advice

Private Mary Sparklecog sat on a small stool in the Oribos Idyllia happily eating a piece of sugar-encrusted fish and looking at the latest missive from her Knight and giggled a bit.

“PVT Sparklecog:

CDR Felmourn has issued the medical company a task; to ensure the well-being of KNT Farnal for the duration his attentions remain engrossed in his current magical project.. whatever that may be. I have decided that the responsibility of this task is to be placed on you. Please ensure that KNT Farnal does these four things; eat, hydrate, bathe and sleep to promote his well-being while his attentions are otherwise elsewhere. As his personal aide, and a medic no less, he will defer to you in matters pertaining to his health.

If you have questions, please return to the Enclave earliest. I shall expect a report on your work at the close of KNT Farnal's project. If KNT Farnal has any questions, please show him this note. KNT Farnal, this serves as my direct order to PVT Sparklecog.

Respectfully,

- K. Brightmaul, KNT

3A1 A/OIC”

“Oooo,” the little gnomish medic said to herself. “I get to give orders to a Knight! Yay! Oh, this will be fun and Knight Farnal does sometimes get a little sleepy and bleary and sometimes stinky, so he does need someone to look after him. Weird that Knight Brightmaul’s hand got all jumpy underlining that word ‘will.’ Something must have interrupted her.” She slid down off the stool – missing once again the Height Adjustment Module she’d scavenged in order to make Captain Tinkertorch’s radio equipment functional here. Some fucking Knight can’t take a bath and you get put on the shit duty, said the Voice in the back of her head. An entire medical ward full of wounded, our ass kicked so severely we had to run, and you’re confined to barracks, then made the babysitter of the snot-nosed kid. If the little bastard can’t keep his shit together well enough to eat his lunch, then what the fuck is he doing anywhere near the field?

She ignored the Voice. She always ignored the Voice. The Voice was a terrible, hurtful, bad, meany person. The Voice thought that all there was to life was family melting away to radiation or friends falling behind enemy lines. The Voice didn’t understand how good life could be if you just…looked at it right. So she pushed it down, like she always did, then put on her bestest, brightest smile and trundled off to find her new charge.

***

She didn’t have to look far.

She found him, clothes rumpled, staring at some weird set of arcane symbols on the wall of the Enclave, just next to the Idyllia. The bags about his eyes told her all she needed to know about his state of sleep, though he didn’t have the odor he sometimes accrued.

“Knight Farnal?” she asked from behind him.

The Knight jumped a bit, clearly startled, though Mary had made no attempt at stealth. Mary giggled at the reaction as this officer took a moment to compose himself before speaking.

Dumbass knows we’re not secure here, and he lets himself get taken by surprise that easily? Doesn’t need a medic, he needs a bodyguard. Or a fucking brain cell, that’d help.

Mary’s smile grew wider as she pushed the Voice back down. “Sir? I’ve been sent by Knight Brightmaul, because you’re being a silly-billy and not sleeping or eating or drinking or stuff and that’s not good for you and so I’m here and I’m going to help you and you’re going to feel sooo much better when we get you on—”

“—yes, Sparklecog,” said the Knight in a clipped tone, cutting her off. “Thank you. I was told to expect your presence. We can have further discussions once I’m done ensuring this ward line is secure. It’s the first time I’ve had our new allied mages do the work, and I need to make sure that it’s up to snuff.”

So we’ve got a half-awake moron double-checking wards set up by the Horde. We’re all going to die here. You get to watch everyone die again. And again, and again, and…

The Voice kept on like that, but Mary stopped listening. Instead, she gave Knight Farnal a giggle. “Oooo, you’re working on super-cool wardy-safe stuff, right? I was on Derrinar’s patrol, and so I like that there’s wards to make us all safe and stuff when we’re being all talky here, that’s a big yay, but don’t you think that it can wait for you to get some sleep because you’ve been up and awake even though you’d been putting together that meeting with our new allies and then you opened that portal and now you’ve been working all night just double-checking someone else’s work and maybe that can wait for eight hours while you—"

“—Shut up, Private,” said the Knight in a whip-crack order tone. “I know your orders. And I will sleep, I promise you, once I know these wards are secure. I’m not risking another security lapse like FOB Indestructible. Am I understood? That. Will. Not—”

It wasn’t Mary that moved her hand. It was the Voice. The big meany-head in the back of her brain where she put all the bad stuff that had happened to her. She knew she had to guard against it at all times, but every once in a while it slipped the leash and took control. Like now.

Knight Farnal looked down at the hypodermic needle the Voice had ejected from Mary’s wrist-dispenser and into his thigh. Then he looked at Mary, an expression of pure disbelief and shock on his face for just a moment before the sedative cocktail took effect and his body went slack.

The Voice wanted to just let him hit the stone floor of Oribos, but Mary had control again. She tapped a couple of buttons on her other wrist, and her patient-moving units had deployed from her waist, levitating up to catch Knight Farnal as he crumpled and ensure that his fall into unconsciousness was safe. “That wasn’t very nice,” she said, more to herself than anything else. “Maybe if I’d talked to him more he would have seen that he had to follow his orders and get some sleep and eat and bathe and stuff.” As she spoke, she deployed her H4ND-EE unit to begin dragging Knight Farnal’s unconscious form back to the medical section of the Idyllia.

Fuck him, said the Voice. Your orders are to make sure he sleeps. Mission a-fucking-ccomplished.

Mary sighed and continued onward, wrestling with something she hadn’t wrestled with in a long, long time. For the first time since the end of the Fourth War…she wasn’t sure the Voice was entirely wrong.

#wyrmrest alliance #wra alliance #thefortyseventh #wyrmrest rp #wyrmrest roleplay #wow rp #wow rp character blogs

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chamomilehoneytea · 7 years ago

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i just read your recent post of knt and ohmygod. oh god. i really feel like crying :') it's gonna end soon and they all are gonna part ways. can't wait to see the ending esp for the side couples!! anyway, i'm really into friends-to-lovers stories, can you recommend some animes/mangas that are based on that? i need to distract myself from knt ;-; thank you sm for bringing us updates and everything!!

Hey @chokokonhanbin!! I’m sorry for replying so late!

I’m crying right there withyou!! Even though the story has been winding down for about a year nowthis announcement really makes the impending conclusion seem real… While I’mgoing to miss the series a ton, I really can’t wait to see how Shiina wraps everythingup for our main characters! She’s been working on this series for over tenyears, so I’m sure she’ll take great care with the ending. And hopefully we’llget that heavily foreshadowed timeskip epilogue so that we can see them allworking and married and having babies (omg!!).

Friends-to-loversstories are the best! I’ve compiled a list for you of some anime and manga thatI think fit that category, although some of these might be a bit of a stretch.I tried to pick series in which the relationship isn’t mutually romantic fromthe very beginning (of course, sometimes one harbors secret feelings for theother, as in the case of Ryu and Chizu :D). Many of the series I’m recommending are not “romances” but they do contain romantic subplots and relationships.

Theremay be some small spoilers in here, but I’ll try not to give anything majoraway - just enough for you to see if you might be interested.

Let’stalk more under the cut…

ANIME

1. Akatsuki no Yona (Yona ofthe Dawn)

Thisseries is a really popular shoujo about a sheltered young princess, Yona, whois forced to flee her kingdom after her father, the king, is murdered. Shenarrowly escapes with the help of her childhood friend / bodyguard, Hak,and the two set out on a long and dangerous journey…

I’veonly seen the anime adaptation, but the story is really great; Yona grows a lot and hasexcellent character development. Her relationship with Hak is also reallywell-done - if you like protective male love interests who would die for the girls they love, I think you’ll enjoy this!

(Bonus,she collects a lot of male friends throughout the story, so if you’re intoreverse harems…)

2. Gosick

Ifyou’re a fan of mysteries with a little gothic flair, you might really enjoyGosick! The story is set in the first half of the 20th century at a fancyacademy in the fictional European country of Sauville. Kazuya Kujou, a bulliedstudent at the school, meets a mysterious, doll-like girl in the library - thetwo lonely teens gradually become friends while unraveling all kinds of mysteries.

Thisseries has some dark elements, although I don’t remember it being too graphicor intense. The two main characters come to rely on each other, and theirrelationship is really sweet.

3. Kiznaiver

Ican’t say too much about this one without getting into spoiler territory, butit’s about a group of teenagers, all from different backgrounds and social circles, who arebrought together as part of a secret experiment. The story is literally allabout feelings (literally haha), and there’s a lot of falling in love and romantic angst. While I would say the story is primarily focused on the natureof friendship and empathy, there are a few friends to lovers pairings…

4. Shinsekai yori

Thisis an incredible, thought-provoking story, and I highly recommend it for that.If you like dystopian / sci-fi settings and themes, this will probably appeal to you -again, I don’t want to give too much away, but there are a few friends tolovers relationships. Though I wouldn’t call this series a romance, it does explorehuman relationships, and consequently, romantic relationships do receive a fair amount of focus.

5. Toradora!

Toradorais, in my opinion, one of the best romance series out there. The two maincharacters are both outcasts, for different reasons; Ryuuji is a kind, gentleboy with an intimidating face, while Taiga is prickly and aggressive in spiteof her small stature. These two unlikely friends unite to help each other findlove - Ryuuji has a crush on Taiga’s best friend, Minori, and Taiga has a crushon Ryuuji’s best friend, Yuusaku. Their relationship is developed really well,and there are a lot of really emotional moments. Can’t recommend it enough!

6. The Rose of Versailles

Anoldie but such a goodie! This series from the 1970s takes place in pre-revolutionaryFrance and follows Oscar de Jarjayes, a girl from a noble family who hasbeen raised as a boy from birth. The only biologically female guard at court,Oscar is assigned to protect the newly arrived future queen of France: the verykind, but very naive, Marie Antoinette.

Thisseries is completely amazing. Oscar is an incredible and complex character whowrestles with her gender identity while kicking ass and thwarting all kinds ofassassination plots. Plus, there’s a pretty complicated relationship with herbest friend since childhood, Andre… If you like history, drama, courtscheming, sword fights, old school bishies, sparkles, and tons of angst, I think you’ll enjoy this. I will warnyou, this is not a happy or light-hearted series (French Revolution) and it’skind of on the long side (40 episodes).

MANGA

1.Hotaru no Hikari

Hotaru is a young woman in her late 20s whose social life is practicallynonexistent; she loves nothing more than lounging around at home in casualclothes, eating junk food, reading manga, and sleeping. She finds herself living in a house that is owned and occupied by her handsome 40 year-old boss, Takano; though he likes to pick on her for being a “dried up woman”, he always helps her through the problems in her messy love life.

Hotaru and Takano are at very different points in their lives, but they become such good friends over the course of the series; they feel completely relaxed and at home when they’re together. Will this unconventional friendship blossom into something more…?

2. Omoi, Omoware, Furi, Furare

This manga is by the author of “Ao Haru Ride” and “Strobe Edge” and is currently serialized in Bessatsu Margaret, alongside “Kimi ni Todoke.” The story revolves around 4 high school students, two girls and two boys. One female protagonist, Yuna, is a shy but sweet girl who loves shoujo manga and has a very idealistic view of love. The other, Akari, is a bit more jaded and has had experience with relationships, giving her a slightly more cynical, realistic perspective. Rio is Akari’s stepbrother, and though Yuna has a crush on him, he’s secretly been in love with Akari since before their parents started dating. Kazuomi is Yuna’s childhood friend, who despite his seemingly carefree nature, has a lot going on under the surface.

Both pairings begin as friends and are still building towards romantic relationships. It’s interesting to see how the characters change through their interactions with each other - it’s a great high school shoujo, and I think the characters are fairly complex for teenagers.

3. Koiiji

This series is a pretty mature love story. The main character, Mame, is a 30 year old woman who has harbored unrequited feelings for her childhood friend, 35 year old father and widower, Souta. Throughout her life she has confessed to him, only to be turned down; still, she continues to love him.

The story is not sugary or idealistic - it feels very grounded in reality, even if that reality is complicated and at times disappointing. Souta doesn’t magically fall for Mame, and her love may come to nothing in the end. But the story is really interesting, and the characters are pretty well-realized - they’re always capable of surprising themselves and the reader. If you want a more realistic, bittersweet story, then I think you might enjoy this.

I hope some of these series interest you! Looking at this list I realized I don’t actually watch / read too many friends to lovers stories - but I do really enjoy them, and these in particular had relationships that stood out to me. I saw that you liked another recommendation ask I published recently - I would also recommend all of those manga series to you as well! Thank you so much for reaching out to me, and happy watching / reading!! :)

#kimi ni todoke #asks #chokokonhanbin #thanks for asking me for recs!

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