#i miss erwin sm

[rafiascribbl]

Happy birthday bossman

[ghoularaki]

Will there be a baby breaths update soon? Sorry if I sound inpatient.

no you're okay!! i'm honestly glad you asked bc i have been meaning to give an update about this. so yes, i will be updating baby's breath soon just not as soon as either of us would have liked. i'm thinking possibly early july

i started a full time job back in april and it has been really hard for me to find a balance between working, my social life (offline and online), and keeping up with my hobbies/writing fics. i'm going to set a schedule for myself so i can actually sit down and write at least an hour each day, i promise </3

[squintsintwink]

I miss my townie makeovers

[rivangel]

i cant read bc of the tears in my eyes.

[venjras]

MIND GAMES - EREN YEAGER.

screaming, crying, throwing up, i love this one sm. hope you’ll enjoy it too. nsfw : slightly exhibitionism, dirty talk, fingering, dry humping, use of pet names, mention of alcool.

you felt on top of the world tonight, you could feel the electricity running through your entire body. heading to the bar where your boyfriend was waiting for you with his friends, since you were early for your date with your bestie you had decided to stop by for a quick hi. after all, it had been a while since you had last seen the boys.

you would have recognized your boyfriend's dark hair from miles away, sitting with one arm resting on the couch, shirt unbuttoned and a bold smirk as he talked to the others. it still seemed unreal that he was your boyfriend. sigh, entering his vision and immediately gaining his full attention. his gaze was quite literally setting you on fire, making it really difficult for you to walk properly towards them. “oh, oh, look who's back.” it was erwin's voice greeting you, bringing you back to the real world. in the meantime eren had stood up, immediately putting an arm around your waist and stealing a small kiss from you. “hello, my love.” his deep tone ran straight down your spine, creating a flock of butterflies in your stomach that made it hard to breathe. trying not to show it, settling next to him, taking off your jacket and leaving it abandoned next to your body, leaving your fit completely expose.

a flowing mini skirt that reached just above your mid thigh, a black shirt tucked into it, extremely tight, mid-knee boots and as a final touch hanging from your neck was the necklace he had given you for your anniversary. shiny. “didn’t think you’d miss me that much, don’t worry it won’t happen again.” you said sarcastically, greeting levi, jean and armin sitting around the rest of the table. they all adored you and it was a mutual feeling, right from the start you had found a really good connection and after all they had turned out to be such precious friends for eren so it couldn’t have been otherwise.

speaking of the devil, he hadn’t taken his eyes off you for not even a second. his arm was stretched out behind you, his hand caressing the back of your neck. he always needed some form of physical contact, even small and this thing had always driven you crazy. it made you weak, slowing down any logic and rational thought. putting you under a spell. you were all lost in talking, chatting about the news and joking animatedly. after half an hour you glimpsed your friend and stood up to hug her immediately. the skirt had risen up a bit, giving a dizzying view to the dark-haired man who couldn't help but lick his lips. just enough to tease him a little. tonight you felt inspired, you wanted to provoke him and maybe end up bent over in the back of his car. obviously the view was simply reserved for him, behind you all was the wall and it was something calculated to perfection. putting on your coat, bending a little to greet him with a kiss and finding his hand on the back of your thigh, caressing the naked skin with his fingertips. “i’ll take you home, hmm? have fun, babydoll.” and so he let you go, your head spinning and your friend’s words sounding all jumbled together.

the hours passed quickly, between one drink and another, not enough to make you drunk but enough to make you feel lightheaded. however, the feeling in the pit of your stomach had not abandoned you, in fact it had only increased. now you were in the car with him, in the passenger seat, you two were driving your friend home. and once you were alone, silence had fallen, but it was a silence full of desire, as if there was no need to speak to know what was going to happen soon. very soon. “baby..” you turned your head towards him, reaching out to caress his hair, now tied in a small ponytail at the back of his head. “i really, really need you.” the words had come out fluidly before you could even think about them, your voice full of need, of desire. taking his hand, already resting on your thigh, bringing it even higher until it collided with the edge of your panties.

the car suddenly stopped, luckily you were on a not very busy street and almost immersed in nothing but pitch black so it was rare for other cars to pass by. in no time you were on top of him, his mouth attached to yours, drinking you up desperately. hands squeezing your ass, pushing you down on his clothed erection, making you feel how much the whole situation was anything but indifferent to him. moaning against his lips. starting to move your hips against his cock, panting as you felt how hard he was. “need you so bad..” your voice was needy, pulling away from him just so you could look at him with pleading eyes, thinking that you could easily come just by seeing him with labored breathing and messy hair, totally fucked.

now he had you turned, back against his chest and the car visor lowered so you could see yourself in the small mirror. legs spread, blushing violently at the thought of being completely exposed to his merce. “you wanted to play, then let’s play.” he said huskily in your ear, making you want to clench your thighs together in search of some relief but being stopped by his hands that kept them well spread. “eren..” your voice was begging him, lifting your hips slightly as one of your hands went back, squeezing his dark locks, not thinking you could resist any longer. you needed him to touch you right now. “what a messy girl.” he quipped at the way your thighs seemed to spread wider at those word, your impatience made him feel lightheaded. his fingers stroking softly along your wet folds through the panties’ fabric. his breathing fanned along your neck and his lips curled when you shuddered into him, drinking in the twitch of your thighs and the muffled whimper slipped from your lips when he collected your slick, trailing it up to ease the first roll of your clit.

he watched your hips twist under his touch, making him press down on the sensitive bud harder before he's finding a pace and rubbing at you with two fingers. your hands grabbing at his forearm with every sinful circle of his fingers against your cunt, whimpering needily against his body and it's almost like you're begging him not to stop, and that only drives him to press into you even harder, more eagerly as he get lost in the way your lips part to moan when he finally sinks his fingers into your pussy. penties finally pulled to the side. “so fucking wet, my pussy it’s always so ready f’ me." he groaned, his tone wavering with the weight of his arousal. he took a handful of your breast through your shirt, grinning when he realised you've decided to go out without a bra tonight, rolling and twisting at the sensitive peak as you whimpered. “such a dirty girl..” eren’s words were heavy, only making the slick between your legs intensify, making it easier for him to sink his fingers into your tight walls, pressing them against the swollen, sensitive spots inside of you with every practiced twist of his wrist. your clit was getting puffier, more swollen with each graze of his palm against it and he couldn't help but pull out of your cunt to rub your slick around it. so so sensitive to his touch.

“e — eren.. ” you gasped, trying desperately to muffle your moans when you looked over to cast him a starry-eyed look, one that lured him in for a kiss that made the whole car spin as his other hand rolled your sensitive nipple between his thumb and forefinger. drinking in your next languid moan of his name, licking into your mouth with such an intensity that made you gasp.

“that's my girl, fuck — ” your thighs trembled around him, breaking apart from the kiss wetly to let your head fall back against his shoulder. he kept up his movements, sinking his fingers into your clenching walls with every few swipes just so he could feel the way you were soon going to be squeezing around his length. letting you ride out your orgasm as you grabbed at him and your hips twisted and jolted with every rub of his fingers as they pulled back to roll your clit, prolonging your blissful state until you were pushing him away with a whimper and breathless pant. but he was breathing heavy from where his chin was pressed into your shoulder, grazing his lips along your jawline when he tapped on your clit. chuckling at the way the tiny aftershocks made you jolt before he gently tapped on your thigh.

you just could never win with him, you would always end up at his feet in the end. not only metaphorically.

©️ venjras.

[neesieiumz]

𓆩☆𓆪 | 𝚂𝙷𝙴𝚁𝙸𝙵𝙵 ⸺ ⚞𝙴𝚁𝚆𝙸𝙽 𝚂𝙼𝙸𝚃𝙷 ⚟

⸻ synopsis ⫸〖 when your home gets flooded out by a bad storm, it's only right for sheriff erwin smith to help you out, right love?〗

⸻ warnings ⫸ sm*t. fluff. minors do not interact. part ii of the gold rush anthology. sheriff!erwin. bar-owner!reader. canon-age Erwin. reader is in her late twenties, or early thirties, however, you wanna see it. afab reader. female reader. black-coded reader. soft-dom!erwin. fingering. squirting. titty-sucking. full-nelson position (yes, can you tell I have a fantasy that I really wanna do?) soft-dom!erwin. he's also really stressed out in this. he also calls you "love" all the time. he also calls you a good girl during this as well. friends-to-lovers. p*rn with plot.

⸻ writers note ⫸ lol much like reiner's this took me like two months to write. y'all better pray it don't take me that long to do eren's or we're gonna have a problem!! I just hope you all enjoy this.

⸻ word count ⫸ 7.0k.

masterlist. | previous part in the anthology | next part in the anthology |

The bar was empty, the kitchen cleaned up, and all quiet as well. The air that once smelled of cheap beer and grease now began to fade into the smell of night dew and wet sand. You stood behind the bar, wiping down the few wet glasses to put away. Glancing out the door, seeing the moon and stars glowing against the midnight sky, sighing as your mind faded back to the events before. Back to the way Erwin and his men had rushed out of here. It has been chaotic for the people within this town. For the past two weeks, those bandits had been ravaging the town, escaping with no trace within the wind. You had overheard their frustrations from both the police force and Garrison boys and how they evaded their every movement. Wiping your wet hands against your dress, turning around to do a final count of the beer stocked behind you. It was a hassle, always being the last one, but you knew no one else could leave your bar the way you do. As you did so, you suddenly heard the door creak and swing open. Gasping, jumping in slight shock, grabbing the closest thing to you before a familiar voice hissed through the air. 

The very same man you were thinking about stomped right through the bar, face red, grumbling in anger. He wasn’t wearing his hat, probably left it at the office as he trampled on through. His bronze-brown vest was unbuttoned, showing off his buttoned-down shirt stained with sand and dirt stains. The smell of wet mud, rain, and sweat hit your nose but you said nothing as he made his way towards you, sitting right down at one of the bar stools. He let out a loud groan, reaching up, losing the scarf he tied around his neck. You let out a breath, not saying a word as you turned right back around, going to one of the beer barrels. Filling it with the one he drinks the most, before sliding it to him. Not missing a beat, he took the tall glass, downing most of it in one go.

“Thank ya kindly, love,” he said, slamming the glass down on the table. 

“Don’t go and break my glass, Erwin,” you joked, taking the glass and going to fill it. 

“My apologies, and no need for more, I’ll be too dizzy to head back home.”

You hummed, before lifting the glass up, sipping down the little you had already poured back into the cup. Erwin said nothing, watching as you licked your lips, shuddering slightly at the taste of the bitter wheat alcohol. 

“I don’t know how you boys can be drinking that shit all day,” a grimace took over your face. 

Erwin smirked, “it’s an acquired taste, could say the same thing about the fancy lil wine you’re always drinking.”

You rolled your eyes at that, smirking, “alright now Erwin..”

Rinsing and washing the glass, before taking the damp rag and wiping it down. Back facing towards him, you spoke once more. 

“Assuming from your attitude, you don’t have any good news about them bandits?”

Almost immediately, you could feel his mood dampen. He groaned, hearing sink further into the table. You glanced back at him, finding both of his large hands covering his face in further frustration. 

“I’m assuming that’s a no,” you said. 

He let out a softer sigh, before pushing himself up once more, looking at you as you shuffled around, still facing the back of the bar. 

“They’re tricky lil things, constantly evading my men,” he sighed, groaning as well as he sat up fully. 

“We chased 'em down to the big forest all the way out there, but we lost' em. Still don’t know how, not like there’s many places to hide up there. We even checked the big cave over there as well and all the possible trees they could hide in.”

Sighing, you placed the glass down with the rest of them before turning around and facing him fully. You leaned over the table, pressing your abdomen against the shiny wood. Using your free hand, you placed your pad on his cheeks, your longer fingers reaching his blond hair, while your thumb stroked his cheek. You could feel his smile form against your hand, smiling soon after that. 

“Kirstein’s been on my ass about finding them, they took a lot of his equipment and it was real expensive for him to buy new ones in the city. Told him to sell his wife’s jewelry and he looked at me like I got two cow heads.”

You couldn't help the chuckle that escaped your lips, thinking about Jean waving his fist over at Erwin, before speaking, “You can’t catch em all Erwin in one night, plus them robbers real sneaky too. First we’ve ever seen someone like this. It’ll be alright, m’kay?”

He nodded his head, and you soon moved your hand, lifting your body upright once again. He glanced around the bar, seemingly noticing that there was no one else there but him. He glanced over at you as you placed the wet rag on the rack hanging from the counter, before stepping out from behind it. Erwin watched you begin slowly turning off the lights hanging around the bar, dimming down all the lanterns. 

“Lemme walk you home, love. Can’t have you out here at night like this.”

You couldn't suppress your smile as you dimmed the last lantern, nothing but the low light of the moon peeking through the door surrounding, darkness swallowing you two whole. 

You sighed, walking back to the bar to grab your bag, “if by home, you mean the motel across town then yeah.”

Turning around, jumping at the sudden tall figure right in front of you. He peered down at you, eyes slightly wide. 

“What you mean by that, love? Why you staying in a place like that?” He asked you.

Letting out a shaky breath, and taking a step back. Erwin was close, so close that it had your heart suddenly palpated a bit, heat suddenly flashing through your body. 

“Um..” your mind went blank for a bit, before resetting, “that storm a few nights ago put me out, my roof and walls leaking so I grabbed what I could and ran down to the motel. Was soaking wet when I got there too.” You slightly snorted at that last part but Erwin’s face didn’t change at all.

“Now why didn’t you tell me about this? I could have helped you?”

You crossed your arms, taking a deep breath to help calm yourself just a bit, “and do what? You and the entire damn force were worried about those bandits. You know I don’t wanna be a bother, Erwin.”

His large, coarse came up to your face, pressing it against your cheek. Your heart kicked back up as he took a step closer to you, stomping over the distance you had put between the two of you. 

“Now you know you could never be a bother to me, love.”

You couldn’t help the smile, looking up into his usually icy blue eyes, hardened from years on the job, that now had a softened look to them. You couldn't help but use your free hand, reaching up and placing it on top of his own. The two of you smiled at each other, before dropping your hands at the same time. Erwin turned around, heading towards the opened door together. 

“I don’t feel comfortable with you staying in the motel, especially with these bandits running around,” he mentioned as he opened the door, holding it open for you. 

Sighing, turning around to lock up the bar, “well, what would you have me do Erwin? Everyone else I know is packed full, and I’m not going into the forest late at night. The carpenter’s are stretched thin with everyone else and won’t finish with my place until next week.”

You put your keys back in your bag, turning around to look at him. His face was lowered, eyebrows furrowed in a look of pondering as the two of you walked through the almost silent town. You could hear a commotion in the background, most likely people having their own get-togethers as well.  

“You could come stay with me. Until they repair your house of course.”

Your eyes widened, head swinging to look at him. The two of you locked eyes as your heart dropped for a quick moment. Stay… at Erwin’s place…? You shuffled a bit as you thought upon the idea, the idea of you two sharing a space for at least a week. Just for a quick moment, a flash of a much more, racy sight of him had your heart pounding a mile a minute. 

“I really don’t wanna put you out like that Erwin,” you spoke up, shuffling and looking away from him, trying your best to be still with your beating heart

Cool hands reached out to your chin, pulling your head up to look at the 6’2 man. 

“Now what did I just say, love? You could never be a burden to me, and you could never put me out.”

With no other words, his other hand reached out, sliding your bag out of his hands before swinging it over his shoulders. He began walking ahead of you, taking a few steps before looking back at you. He jerked his head, motioning for you to follow him. With no other words, softly smiling as you turned and walked towards him, the two of you walking in step as you walked through the town. Despite the sheriff's office being in the center of town, Erwin preferred to live a bit of the way in the opposite direction away from the forest. He likes being near the main entrance of the town, just in case something happens. As you were halfway there, a large gust of sudden cold wind blew past the two of you, causing you to shiver a bit. Your arms crossed each other, your hands stroking them to create some kind of heat. Erwin must have noticed your actions as all of a sudden, you heard a ‘plop’ before a weight fell upon your shoulders. Looking around, you saw the jacket Erwin was wearing draped across your shoulders. You looked up at him, noting him pointedly not looking back down at you as he continued walking. You let off a small smile, snuggling into the warm jacket, sounding off a soft “thank you” before continuing to walk behind him. 

The two of you soon got to his home, a simple two-story house given to him by the townspeople, a thank you for all that he does. You followed behind him as he fished for his keys out of his pockets, unlocking the door and pushing it open as he did so. He gestured for you to enter his home first, stepping out of the way for you. Soon after, he walked in behind you, closing the door behind you as you stood in his dark living room. He carefully slid past you, his hands reaching out to your waist to stabilize you easily as he walked over to a corner. Soon the room began to illuminate, allowing you to look at the quaint and simplistic living room. There was barely anything in the living room, a simple couch, a table along with a record sitting in the corner. Erwin straightened himself before turning around and walking abc towards you. 

“Let me take you to where you’ll be resting your head, love.”

He took you by the hand, causing you to gasp as he took you towards the stairs, which you hadn't noticed right near the front door. He guided you up the stairs, your bag still sitting and swinging on his shoulders. Coming up to the second floor, he took you down a hall before pushing a door open. You tilted your body behind him, peeking into the place where he led you. It was a bedroom, presumably the place where you would be resting your head for the next week or so. It was simple, a bed on a wooden stand with a night drawer right beside it. You followed behind him as he placed the bag right onto the bed before turning around. 

“This is one of the guest bedrooms, mainly for Levi whenever he comes into town, but he’s busy working on another case.” 

You blinked, nodding along as he explained where some of the things are. 

“The bathroom is the door right here,” he said, gesturing to the only other door in the room. 

There was also a huge dresser, instead of a closet which was fine as well, better for you since you wouldn't be staying for long anyways

“There’s one more guest bedroom down the hall, but it’s unfurnished so it's just full of boxes. So the only other room you’ll see up here is my own room.”

You turned towards him smiling, eyes welling up with tears of appreciation, “thank you again for this Erwin, you really didn't have to.”

He approached you, his long arms reaching out holding you on the shoulders, “how many times do I have to tell you, it's not a problem, love. Now, make yourself at home.” He said, before letting your shoulders go. 

He gave one last smile, before walking towards the door, opening it, and walking it out. The moment he left, you let out a sigh of relief, fanning off the sudden heat of nervousness from your face. You crossed the room, sitting on top of the bed before reaching for your bag. This was all you had brought with you when you left your home, most of your things water-damaged from the storm. You unzipped it, before sifting through all your clothes and things before pulling out a few night dresses that weren’t damaged. 

The rest of the night was uneventful, taking a shower to wash off the smell of alcohol and food on my body before slipping under the cool sheets. Despite the obvious unused in the room, the sheets still smelled fresh, like they were recently cleaned. You smiled, relishing in the soft feeling, unlike the itchy blankets over at the motel. 

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── ·

It had been three days since you had taken solace in Erwin’s home, and the two of you found yourself in comfortable waters so easily. At first, it was nerve-wracking being in such close proximity to him, but you soon found it easier the more he reassured you. He had shown you around in the morning after you had arrived, before personally walking you back to the bar to open up for the day. He would meet you at the end of the day, even if he had night duty, to walk you back to the house as well. His pure actions and gestures only made you yearn and pine for him more. 

As you stood in his kitchen, the bar closed up early to account for the sudden curfew the mayor had just put out. You knew Erwin was working hard and late nights, you would hear him come in late at night sometimes, your mind only tuning into his heavy footsteps creaking against the wood floors before falling back into your heavy sleep. And like clockwork, he would get up at the same time as you, to walk you to the bar. He would come in when it closed to walk you home before heading back to his office as well. You knew it was weighing over him, all this responsibility to bring peace back to your town, where more and more people were coming in from the city to experience the rush happening all over. 

You glanced over to your left, out the window, where you could see Erwin’s form hunched over, barely illuminated by the light inside the home. Sighing, you closed the pot of stew you were brewing, wiping your hands cleaning with a wet rag before walking out, towards the door. The breeze was blowing slightly, sand sifting out in the distance. The scenery in front of you was enjoyable, much more than what your own home would have to offer. The slight rancid smell of smoke pulled you out of your thoughts. Turning towards your right, seeing the blonde man hunched over the railing, a cigar in one hand, a glass of brown liquor in the other. 

“Those things’ll kill you, Erwin.” you spoke out, cutting through the slice of the night. 

His head turned slightly towards you, eyes staring right back at you. He smirked, lifting up his cigar before taking another hit. 

“This stress’ll kill me before these things do.”

You rolled your eyes, walking towards him, taking the space right beside him. The cigar smoke only smells stronger, so you knew this wasn't his first one of the night. He leaned back suddenly, throwing back the rest of his bourbon, pressing his half-burnt cigar into the railing, making another of what seemed to be numerous burn marks. Glancing behind you, at the small little area Erwin had set up on his porch, you found the bottle of bourbon along with a pack of cigars and another empty glass. You took a step back, grabbing the bottle and the glass before standing right beside him again. You poured yourself one before pointing the bottle towards Erwin, who looked down at the bottle, before holding his own glass out. You poured halfway to his cup, before placing the bottle on the railing beside you. 

You turned back towards him, tipping your glass towards him, and Erwin immediately clinked it with yours. You took a sip while Erwin basically downed the whole thing once more. Pulling the glass away, a scowl appeared on your face as you looked at the drink. 

“I still don’t know how you people drink this type of shit,” You spoke, reminiscent of when you took a sip of beer a few days ago, leaning down again the railing, holding the glass with two hands. 

He chuckled, shuffling closer to you, leaning over the railing as well. 

It was silent between the two of you, just taking in the scenery at the moment. The wind was blowing just a little harder than before, the air smelling just a bit humid from the past storms tormenting the town. You could see the Kierstein ranches in the distance, along with the forest where your friend and coworker lived as well. 

“Tell me what’s on your mind Erwin, you know I’m worried.”

His chuckle lightly echoed through the almost empty home, facing straight as he pushed himself up, “Hange’s been on me about getting these bandits. Luckily it seems they’ve stopped for now, but we still can't find whatever they’ve stolen. Towns ‘n a riot.”

You knew about the last part, as many angry men walked into your bar, cursing out both the thieves and Erwin for not finding their missing things. You were only lucky that your bar still hadn't been hit yet, but you couldn’t say the same thing for the other bars and pubs around town. You’d honestly never have seen anything like this, the way people have only confirmed three people yet they were able to flip a huge town like this on its head. You move your hand on his face towards his back, rubbing and caressing him trying your best to provide some solace. 

“Cut yourself some slack Erwin, there’s only so much you can do in this. I’m sure you are doing all you can.”

He only sighed, leaning back fully, looking up towards his ceiling, “but am I doing enough? There’s something I’m missing in this.” He shook his head, hand reaching up and basically slapping his forehead. 

“Fuck, I got a nasty headache,” he mumbled, before suddenly sniffing. 

He blinked, eyes furrowed in confusion, before turning back towards you, “you cooking something?”

You blinked, before the smell of char hit your nose, causing you to jump straight up. Squeaking as you raced inside, throwing the door open before running back to the kitchen. You reached the stove, grabbing the pot before moving it to an unused burner kneeling down, disconnecting the gas. You could feel Erwin’s eyes on you as you lifted the pot, sighing in relief as the smell of strong spices and herbs fully filled the air instead of a charcoal-burnt smell. Slowly you turned towards Erwin, locking eyes with his slightly concerned ones. 

“Want some soup?”

He smiled before standing up, you tried to tell him to sit down, as you didn't want him to do any to aggregate his said headache even further but he didn’t listen to you. He crossed the kitchen before standing right behind you, placing his hand on your waist as he reached up to the cupboards.

“‘Scuse me, love,” he said, opening the cupboards to bring out two bowls. 

His large hand rested right on your waist, letting an almost silent shaky breath as he squeezed it, bringing down the bowls to your level. Your hyperawareness only caused you to ache down there, your thighs squeezing together as he placed the bowls down on the counter. He helped you prepare the dishes, washing his hands before he did so. He grabbed the silverware along with two glasses of water as you ladled the food into the bowls. The two of you carried the food into the living room, rather than the fancy little dining room Erwin barely used. The two of you sat right next to each other, eating away at the late-night dinner you made. 

You did your best to keep Erwin’s mind off of work, and it seemed to have worked, the tense furrow on his brow reposting as you spoke of the latest gossip between the townsfolk, what you would hear day by day. How one of your long-time patrons’ had suspicions of his husband cheating, only for his husband and best friend to roll in two hours after he left. People have a lot of audaciousness is what he said after you told him about that. 

The soup you cooked soon disappeared between the two of you, along with the glasses of water as you spoke way into the night. Erwin had brought in the bourbon he was drinking, and the two of you shared the bottle, diluting it with water of course. You don’t know how it happened but the space you had put between you and the tall man had slowly decreased. Your thighs touching, shoulders grazing each other, the two of you unconsciously getting closer. 

“Oh, you got a little something here, love,” Erwin suddenly said, cutting into your giggles. 

Before you could say anything, his hand suddenly reached out to your face, his large hand cupping your face. 

With a slight sharp inhale, you could only look over at the side, seeing his thumb rub away at stains you had not seen from the corner of your eye. Erwin rubbed at it a little harder, but it seemed the smudge wouldn’t go away. He moved closer to you, leveling eye contact with you as his rough hands finally cleaned off the stain. By then, his face and you were so close together, your noses were barely touching. You let off a smile, thanking him for the help. He only smiled at your face, but his hand still rested on your face. Breathing deeply, as you closed your eyes, the scent of his sweat mixed in with his cologne, the smell of smoky vanilla bourbon, and cedar wood, along with the smell of blackened cigar smoke. It didn't deter you though. You could feel his presence get closer to you, the heat of his face radiating into your own. 

You opened your eyes just in time as Erwin closed the gap between the two of you, pressing his lips harshly against your own. You gasped, the sudden intensity catching you off guard, the sudden pressure causing you to stumble back a bit. Reaching up to him, one hand reaching up to his shoulder and the other resting right underneath his jawline. He tasted savory, the lingering taste of your late-night dinner still on his tongue. It didn’t deter you, in fact, you only pushed against him, your panties beginning to soak as his arms reached around you, wrapping and picking you up with ease. He placed you right on his lap, his other hand leaving your face, sliding down your hips to underneath your bottom, cupping it before squeezing gently. 

You suddenly let go of the kiss, lips wet as looked down into his blue eyes, which seemed deeper in color than usual. His usual cerulean blues now looked more like royal blue as you pressed your hips against him. You could feel his hard-on pressing up against your panties underneath your thin dress. Your hands reached, running them through his blonde hair. He smirked, lifting his head to look up at you.

“Erwin,” was all you said before he kissed you again.

You were much more ready for his kiss, accepting it with equal pressure. Unconsciously, your hips began to move above him. His gentle squeeze turned brutal as you rutted into him more, your juices beginning to seep into his rough jeans. Your hands soon left his hair, sliding down his neck, your delicate touches only causing him to shiver against you. Your manicured nails soon reached down to his shirt, the first few buttons unfastened already. Unbuttoning the rest, your hands grazed over his muscles, over every ridge and every scar from years on the job. He shivered under you, letting go of the kiss for a quick moment. 

“So fucking long,” he groaned, moving up against your ear, “I’ve waited for this.”

Before you could say anything, Erwin cut you off, pressing his wet lips behind your ear, trailing down to your neck. Steadying yourself, digging your nails into his side as he reached your collarbone, nibbling away at it. The aching within you only growing, and sweat beginning to drop down your back, seeping through your thin dress. His head soon dipped to the valley between your breasts as your own hands slid down to his jeans, fiddling with the belt that held them up. Erwin’s large hands left your bottom, reaching under before grabbing at the fabric. 

You could hear a stretch, the sound echoing through the room as you gasped, lifting your head to glare at the sudden cool air breeze against your back. 

“Erwin! I really liked that dress!” 

He only chuckled, seeing the rest of the scraps falling off your body, leaving you and nothing but your drenched panties. He only groaned at the sight, his hands leaving you as they shrugged off his vest, unwrapping his scarf. You assisted him, gliding your hands underneath the sleeves of his shirt, before sliding the shirt off his body. Once off his body. You threw the shirt into an obscure corner, before facing him again. Erwin thumbed at your panties, hooking underneath the waist and thigh band before slowly pulling it down. Your arousal dripped as you clenched around nothing, resting your naked body against Erwin’s half-naked own. Gasping as cool air hit your clit as he pulled your panties down fully, your nails digging into his biceps. The around you was hot as you lifted your legs up as best as you could, helping him slide the clothing off fully of your body. 

Seeing as you were fully naked while Erwin was still in his jeans, your hands gently brushed down his arms, reaching to his belt before slowly beginning to unbuckle it. At the same time, Erwin leaned down towards you, lips pressed against your neck. Hands fumbling as you shivered, the feeling of his trailing down your neck, towards your chest. His own hands slide up and around your waist, sliding up your abdomen before reaching your breasts. His large hands reached your breasts, pushing and massaging them. His lips soon wrapped around your hardened nipple, before sucking away at it. 

“Fuck,” cursing and gasping as a rush of euphoria shot through you. 

The fingers on his other hand squeezed your other nipple slightly, just enough to increase the inciting feeling rushing through you. Your hands slide up, grazing against his slightly scarred back, reaching into his soft, blonde hair before gripping harshly. The sensitivity in your nipples only amplified as he sucked at it. You let out long breathy moans as he teased you, letting out a particularly high-pitched moan as he suddenly pinched and moaned at your free nipple. Soon after he let up, the cool air hit your wet nipple before moving his attention to your other one. His hand slid back down your body, sliding in between your legs, before slowly parting your thighs, revealing your drenched cunt. His long fingers slipped in between your folds, swiping up and down in between them before slowly pressing his finger against your clit.

“Erwin,” you gasped, pulling on his hair, causing him to groan, lips still wrapped around your nipple. 

His finger continued to press and slowly rub circles into your clit, collecting the juices that continued to seep out of you. Your hips ground against him, your body aching for more, something else to fill the need trying to build within you. Erwin’s actions taunted you, his finger slipping in between your folds, the tip of his finger teasing the entrance to your hole. Your back curled as he slowly, ever so slowly, pressed his fingers inside of your, your arousal making it easier for him to slip inside of you. Your hips jerked and buckled, craving more and more stimulation. As he moved his finger, his mouth let go of your nipple, before resting his head right on our shoulder, lips lined up with your ear. 

“More,” you cried, burrowing your face into his shoulder. 

He only chuckled, his raspy chuckle only rousing you further, “you know you have to relax for me,” he mumbled. 

Taking a breath, you tried your best to, release the hold you have in his hair, sliding them and crossing them behind his neck, holding him close. 

“That’s it,” he murmured, before pressing another finger inside of you, “open up just for me.”

The stretch was slightly painful, but as quickly as the pain came, it went. You cried out even louder against his ear as his thumb pressed against your clit. Erwin’s fingers moved up and down inside of you, just as he began to nibble and kiss along the outer part of your ear, his heated breath only causing you to shiver and shudder against him. You tried to move your hips along the movement of his digits before a loud smack rippled against your skin, the pain heated so gratifyingly against you. 

“Stop moving,” his voice was harsh, it caused your heart to skip a beat. 

You trembled in his hold, but his voice commanded you, taking charge as your movements suddenly slowed down to a complete stop. 

“Good girl,” he groaned before continuing his actions. 

You could only whimper as his words, combined with the increasing pace of his fingering only caused the aching feeling building within you to surge and skyrocket. You basically drenched his fingers as he made his way with you, fucking you with his fingers while playing with your clit. Letting a high-pitched moan, you curled over, forehead resting right against Erwin as heat surged up and built within you. Your already quivering body trembles further. 

Suddenly, before you could reach that high peak, Erwin suddenly pulled his fingers out of you, leaving you shivering, cold and empty. You couldn't help but whine in his arms as he lifted his hands up, his two fingers and his top knuckles covered in your arousal. He soon pressed his hand against his lips, tasting your juices before licking his fingers clean. Once finished, his now-free hand joined his other, gripping your ass. Without warning, he suddenly stood up, his grip around you only tightening to keep you up in the air as you shriek, your arms tightening around his neck and shoulders. 

“Erwin—” you shrieked as you were lifted up into the air. 

Below you, you could see his pants and boxers pooled around his ankles before looking up to look at him. With no warning, you leaned towards him, capturing him into another kiss as you could feel him lifting the lower part of your body up, readjusting him and yourself. You melted into the kiss, your arms sliding back to allow you to hold his head between your heads. His usual cleaned-up hair was messed up, slightly drenched with sweat. Saliva was exchanged between the two of you, tongues swirling within each other's mouths. 

For a moment, you let go of his kiss, lips still pressed against him as you whispered, “I need you inside me, please, please, please, I can’t wait anymore…”

Erwin didn’t say a word, only enrapturing you into another kiss. Eventually, you could feel the tip of his hard-on pressing up against you, parting your inner labia. You let out a restrained moan into his mouth. With no other warning, he pressed on, overwhelming you even further. You abruptly let go of the kiss as you let out an impassioned cry, tongue falling out of your mouth as you brace yourself. The intensity had you convulsing within Erwin’s arms, your shaking legs easily held together by his strong arms. You could hear Erwin grunting and letting off heavy groans as he began to bottom out into you. His motions started off slow, just like his fingering actions before, allowing you to get used to his large size. The heated pressure around adding on to the sweat dripping down your body as Erwin began to move. 

“Fuck,” he cursed in your ear.

“Erwin,” you called out his name, laying your head on his shoulder as your face twisted in intensity. 

He grunted against you before speaking lowly into it, “Move your head, wanna— fuck— wanna see your pretty face.”

His voice was thick and sweet, like the most delicious chocolate cake, it coaxed you, as you moved your head, your locs brushing to the side as you gazed into his blue eyes. His pace quickened, the wet smacks echoing through the room, adding volume to your already thunderous moans. It was overwhelming, Erwin was overwhelming, a man who commanded the space around him, you couldn't help but succumb deeper and deeper to his glamor. He ravished you, his restraint breaking more and more as he savored your expressions, your sounds, and even the way you smelled. Your juices leaked all over the both of you, his hips plunged into you, the tip of his cock hitting your very core. The two of you bring out the best and worst in each other. 

You cried out his name once more, your body lurching against him, “Erwin, ahh—” You were suddenly cut off by your own lewd moan, dripping in lust. 

Erwin let off a deep groan disguised as a chuckle as he felt you involuntary clenching around him, the sudden tightening pushing him to a whole new level. His once strong-rhythmic thrust became erratic in nature. 

“You gonna come for me, love?” He groaned in your ear, the grip he had on your ass bruise-worthy. 

Nodding your head erratically, you only had a moment’s reprieve before your climax came rushing at you at full speed.

“Aaaahhh,” you threw your head back in ecstasy as you went still for a moment, everything tensing over as your orgasm washed over you. 

Erwin wasn’t letting up, as overstimulation began to set within you, your recently mind-numbing orgasm not helping you. You could do nothing but hang off for Erwin as he basically used you like a fuck-toy until he had reached his own peak. With a few final grunts, you could feel him spilling inside of you. The room now only echoed with your heavy breaths. Slowly, you opened your eyes, looking at his drenched blonde hair before using what little strength you had to pick up your head. The two of you locked eyes before breaking out into soft smiles. The two of you placed soft kisses on each other, as he turned around before slowly lowering your connected bodies on the couch. He slowly lowered you there before easing himself out of you, a slight hiss leaving your mouth as he did so. You grimaced as you felt your mixed fluids beginning to ooze out of you. You bent down, picking up your panties before sighing at the scraps of your dress on the floor. 

The two of you cleaned up, with you walking around in Erwin’s shirt while he stood in nothing but his boxers. He helped you put away the soup, and clean up the bowls you used. Once everything was clean, he dimmed out the latent, swallowing you all in darkness as you waited for him by the stairs. You could see his presence right in front of you, before squealing as he suddenly picked you up, bridal style. 

You wrapped your arms around him, before speaking, “you always gonna pick me up like this?”

He hummed, as he made it to the top of the stairs, shifting his body towards his bedroom door. He easily opened it with one hand whilst still holding you up. His room was quaint, with not many decorations, the few you could see were mainly photo frames of him and his team of police officers. Erwin laid you comfortably on the bed, however before he could walk to the other side and join you. A loud knock echoed through the house, jolting the both of you. You looked over at Erwin whose relaxed expression now took on a more hardened one. He walked over to his dresser, grabbing a pair of sweatpants before slipping them on. 

“Stay here,” he told you, seeing as you were beginning to push yourself off the bed. 

His words were stern and clear, so you sat back against the bed, watching him exit the room. Outside, Erwin walked down the stairs before eyeing his front door. Besides him, he reached into a drawer to pull out his gun. He slowly walked towards the door, slowly placing his hand on the knob before looking through the peephole. Erwin saw the familiar figure, relaxing as he opened the door fully. 

Standing on his porch was his secretary, a person he was not planning on seeing until he went in for work the next day. 

Erwin placed the gun on the table near him,, “almost thought you were someone else, what are you doing here?”

She let off a little awkward smile before handing him a file, “for you, sir.”

Erwin blinked, before taking the file and flipping through it. The familiar notes and words had Erwin furrowing his brow.

“This is the Kierstein report… Jaeger was supposed to get this for me, yesterday.”

The secretary shrugged her shoulders, “you know Eren was never going to get it done, especially when it comes to Jean. So it was either get it done or get Jean on our ass again.”

Erwin sighed, smacking the file against his head slightly, the migraine that had gone away slowly returning as he thought about his most ambitious officer. 

“I’ll have a few words with him tomorrow, get home, go get some sleep.” He called out to her, beginning to close the door not before hearing a noise, resembling a giggle coming from her. 

“Oh I’ll definitely get some sleep tonight, I wonder if you will as well.”

Erwin stopped in his tracks, turning back towards his secretary before seeing her point toward his chest. Erwin glanced down only seeing small red and purple bruises littered all over his neck and upper chest. His secretary could no longer hold back their giggles, muffling them with her hand as Erwin felt a flush of heat run through him. 

“Just, just get home.” He said sternly, before slamming the door shut. 

He waited until he heard steps leading away from his porch before letting out a breath, leaning against his door for a moment.

“Erwin,” your sweet voice called out.

He looked up, seeing you standing at the top of the stairs. He could see the light from the hallway illuminating, allowing him to see you standing there, still in his shirt. 

“Everything okay?” you asked, beginning to take a step down. 

He nodded his head, before placing the file on his living room table and heading towards the stairs, “Yeah, just someone dropping off a report, I’ll be up soon.”

You nodded your head, fiddling with the buttons before slowly turning your body. He could only stare as you slowly unbuttoned each and every button, before slowly lowering the shirt, revealing the top half of your naked body. You said nothing, only giving him a knowing smirk before walking to the right back to his own bedroom. 

Erwin glanced over at the report, before looking back up the stairs where you had just stood before him, enticing him. With no other thought, he left the report on the table before scaling up the stairs, making it to his bedroom, and shutting the door behind him. 

taglist: @kanekisfavoritegf @daisynik7 @where-the-blackbirds-sing @nathalunalune @secretanimesimp @kentucky-fried-me @levin4nami @liv-vy @mortqlprojections @invisible-mori @desiray562 @liliorsstuff-blog @sophiiluvvs @magictrump @ventdavi154 @ircngirl @lostinbeidou @missmadness123 @introvered-violinist @dior-fawn @saway4ma @reallongwire @nerdy-simp-7120 @stareatceiling @ehveerivv @zzg0d @custard-exe @phillygraves @rapsgoddess @pumpkin-toffee @theemrsjaeger @sharkiebarkie @jnsa-17 @itmightbejo @chile-im-embarrassed

[marsbutterfly]

Final Mission - Remastered

Summary: The rumbling begins to close in on you and your friends. With very few choices remaining, you have to watch as Hanji makes a decision that will alter the course of your life forever.

a/n: hello hello!! So ever since part 3 part 1 came out, I decided to start working on rewriting my very first work, for Hanji and for Attack On Titan. This piece has always meant so much to me as it was written with lol sm grief? anyway, I know it's been a while but Hanji pls come back, the kids and I miss you babes.

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: attack on titan season 4 part 3 (part 1) spoilers if you haven't watched it yet, angst, blood, established relationship, soulmate loss, a bit of resentment towards tbh everyone if you squint. | ao3 | wattpad | the original | wc: 3.3k

“You could break my heart in two

But when it heals, it beats for you”

“I’m the one who brought everyone here. I killed my comrades to come this far. I’ll take responsibility for it all,” Hanji says, her hands trembling while grasping the thunder spears firmly, eyes filled with terror while a shallow breath fights to leave her lungs. The ground shakes beneath you and a chilling sensation courses down your spine.

You finally find the courage to turn around to face her as she approaches the group, words dying and being reborn in your throat as you struggle to find just the right thing to say, eventually landing on the bleakest yet most desperate request, “Don’t you fucking dare.”

Her footsteps are heavy, contrasting clearly with those of the colossal titans as they march towards you. Her vision is focused on the young, blonde boy ahead of you and you can tell she is trying with all her might to avoid your eyes, afraid of the reaction you might have.

“Armin Arlert,” her voice is gentle, gentler than it has been in a while, almost as if the heavy burden of the world inside the walls has finally lifted from her shoulders and she could actually think straight, “I hereby designate you the 15th Commander of the Scout Regiment.”

The remainder of the words exchanged between the two of them simply echoes in your brain, going from one ear to the other, almost as if they were speaking sheer gibberish. It doesn’t make sense, none of it does. Why is she making him commander when she is still standing right there? Hopefully not for the reasons you are expecting, right? Your thoughts move a thousand times faster than the actual conversation flows.

Your eyes are fixated on the scenery before you, a mixture of feelings coursing through your veins and your heart feels like it has been missing a few beats as an intense void begins to creep from deep inside of you. The situation is not ideal: the colossal titans get closer by the second, the atmosphere becomes hotter with their steam clouding the air and an overwhelming feeling of despair grows in your chest.

You focus on the sound of her voice, the same sound that has brought you so much comfort in the most trying of times now makes no sense, no matter how you look at it. Her face, which has always been your absolute favorite piece of art to ever exist, now contorted into a pained and saddened expression. In fact, it reminded of the way she looked when Erwin announced she would be taking over the Scouts in case he didn’t make it through Shiganshina.

You are finally pulled out of this trance once she begins to move again, this time towards Levi, confused and worrying eyes following her every move carefully as she moves across the brick bridge. From where you stand, you can see the black haired man tightening his left fist, the breeze hitting every so lightly, just barely enough for it to lift his hair and show you that he is sharing a quick glance with you before returning to Hanji.

“Hey, four-eyes,” he says. That’s the first time you have heard him call her those two words since she became commander. He had told you once before he did it out of respect, seeing that she was now his superior, so for him to say it now, in a moment like this, that is when the realization and truth of the moment finally began to dawn on you.

“You understand, right, Levi?” Her voice trembles in the slightest, in a manner that would be unnoticeable to anyone else but you and the man she is speaking to, “my turn has come at last.”

Hanji raises her hands, fingertips trembling and causing the thunder spears to shake, the sweat glistening on her face as her pupils twitch, it’s a sight you hoped to never see. She tries to play her nervousness off, “I’m giddy with the desire to make a supremely cool exit. Don’t stop what I’ve got going.”

For the first time, her eyes meet yours and you realize only then how many tears she was holding back, a quiet sob dying in your throat as you yelp, your body rejecting your brain’s commands to move, legs stuck in place and swallowing has never been this hard.

With a sigh, you hear those three words out of Levi’s mouth, the same words that are now only chanted by a ghost or a distant memory, “Dedicate your heart.” It feels like a punch to the stomach, air can no longer find its way inside your lungs and you choke on your own saliva, there is no denying what is about to happen anymore and the overwhelming sensation that there is nothing you can do to change it overwhelms you.

She smiles and lets out a gentle giggle, “That’s the first time I’ve heard you say that.”

Lastly, she makes her way towards you. The need for oxygen is intense but the very second that her gentle fingertips touch your face, the world seems to stop for a moment and every worry you have ever had dissipates into the feeling.

“I truly hope that you can forgive me one day,” she says and the tears that dangled from her eyes were finally allowed to fall. With a smirk on her lips, she blew on your face so that your hair would move from one spot to the other and the smell of her breath fills you with a sense of nostalgia and despair.

“Please don’t say that,” you whisper, bringing your body closer to hers, “you are the only family I have left. I don’t know where to go without you,” your voice trembles, your throat is as dry as the deserts you’ve heard Armin talk so much about. The tips of your fingers gently twirl a loose strand of hair that falls on her face.

Hanji turns her face at a precise 90 degree angle to look at Levi, a stoic expression on his face though his eyes tell you everything you need to know about his feelings. A tear runs down Hanji’s face, but only one as she won’t allow herself to fully break down until you are out of sight, “Will you take care of her for me?” He doesn’t respond with words, the only thing he does is nod his head in agreement.

Her eyes make their way back to you as she uses both of her hands to carefully cup your face, lips meeting yours with a desperation you had never seen before, almost as if she is trying to engrave you on her own body. Her tongue glides with yours for a couple of seconds and you feel the butterflies rising in your stomach as if it were the first time you have kissed her.

The moment couldn’t have been longer than a few seconds but it felt like forever and a day, your body nearly melting in contact with her touch. For a split moment, you forgot about the rumbling, about Eren, about the sacrifice she was about to make, nothing mattered anymore. Nothing but this very moment the two of you share.

Everything feels ok for a little while, the warmth of her brown eyes reminds you of the many cups of tea you have shared in the barricades, the softness of her touch bringing up memories of times you’ve met under the apple tree in the courtyard, and the gentleness on her lips stirring butterflies in your stomach, much like the very first time you’d seen her.

However it does not last long. You are brought back to reality by the sound of her ODM gear going off, the hook gripping onto the wall and the cold feeling her lips leave behind. Hanji doesn’t give you enough time to stop her, she simply pulls away before you could even react.

She doesn’t say anything. In the years that passed since she became commander, Hanji had been preparing you for the inevitable moment when she passes away, when her turn to make a sacrifice to save your life would come. In that time, you let your guard down, you had convinced yourself something like that would never happen, not to the both of you.

Your eyes are fixated on her every move, every swing of her blade, every flicker of her cape, and there is nothing you can do. Frozen in place, you watch in horror as she manages to take down a few of the colossal titans on their path of destruction. It wasn’t enough. The engineers still need more time.

Trembling hands struggle to find a way onto your blades as a thought goes through your brain, “How can I help her?” By the time you manage to look back up, you catch a glance of a scene that could only be described as your worst nightmare: your beloved’s body, the person you’ve loved most for the past few years, catching on fire as a result of the bodily heat of the colossal titans.

Your heart sinks in your stomach and all you can do is scream. Your feet begin to move as you make up your mind to run and assist them but a pair of strong hands get a hold of your waist before you have time to move forward.

“Reiner, let me go,” you demand, in vain. No matter just how much you kick, or scream, or scratch him, his grip will not loosen and a sense of utter despair fills you. Your throat burns and your vision is blurred out by all the tears, your hands are shaking and there is nothing more you can do.

The last drop was the moment you caught a glimpse of her lifeless, burned to a crisp body falling from the sky like a meteor ready to destroy your life. You had no more fight left in you, no more strength remaining to try and free yourself from Reiner’s arms.

Something inside of your brain begins to slip away, was it your sanity? Or something more personal, like your spirit? No, this was a feeling you had encountered time and time again, expedition after expedition, titan kill after titan kill, hopelessness. Except this time, the feeling was a thousand times worse.

Without her, how would you be able to find Eren and stop the rumbling once and for all? Not only that, but for the first time, probably ever, you questioned her judgment, after all, how could Armin be commander? The boy who was chosen over Erwin, part of the reason why you found yourself in this situation in the first place.

No, there was no use in pointing fingers at each other. If in a situation like this, where life and death walked hand in hand, she chose him, then you would trust her judgment, even if you didn’t agree with it, even if you believed it to be the wrong choice.

Your eyelids grow heavier the closer you get to the plane, the tears have yet to stop running down your face and a full body spread of goosebumps has taken hold of your skin. You manage to take a deep breath before allowing your exhausted body to slip into unconsciousness and, for the last time, you hear her voice.

“I love you.”

The pounding sensation in your head is nearly too much to bear. You squint through closed eyes, slowly using whatever little strength you have left to raise your arm, shielding your face from the far too close sun rays. The atmosphere surrounding the area is so heavy you could cut it with a knife, but a determined Armin breaks free from the awkwardness. “Listen up,” he says, the confidence is his voice masking his true emotions, “Let’s go over the plan.”

Their voices are now a bit louder, the slight turbulence you come across every so often causes the plane to shake and every last bit of metal to scrape against one another. You can hear the sound of a pencil scribbling on the metal floor, but whether it is writing or drawing, you are unable to realize.

As the conversation goes by, your ears begin to ring and your mind can’t help but wonder how long it has been. You take your hand up to your chest, clutching tightly to the fabric that covers the area above your heart, it feels empty, like it has been broken in two and the pieces have been flung out into space.

Has it been seconds? Has it been days? No, while it feels like an eternity has passed, deep down you know that it has only been somewhere between fifteen to thirty minutes. Tears begin to pool up in your eyes once more, that emptiness eating away at your stomach while you choke down a desolate sob. You don’t want to draw attention towards yourself but yet somehow, you find yourself as the center of everyone’s concern.

For a while, no one dares to move, speak or even breathe. You can’t be bothered by their reactions or lack thereof, the pressure on your chest desperately needs to be released. The tears won’t stop flowing, air fails to enter your lungs as heavy hiccups erupt from deep within your soul. The void you feel could only be compared to a bottomless abyss, not knowing when it will end.

Once you have no more tears left, you try your best to use your arms to sit up, cursing yourself for being so weak in the face of such immediate danger. Footsteps approach you and a helping hand finds a comfortable spot on your lower back, gently assisting you in your attempt to sit. You don’t need to see the person’s face to know exactly who it is.

“Mikasa,” you say, not quite sure if it is a question or if anything else is going to follow.

“How are you feeling?” She asks, her voice is raspy and gentle, like she has been doing some crying of her own. You can’t help but smirk, not out of happiness, but because you know they all already have an idea of what your answer is going to be.

“It feels like my heart has just been ripped out of my chest and I had to watch as it burned,” you say and they all immediately understand that you are referring to the condition you were forced to leave Hanji’s body in. It is a stupid question but, for some reason, it does make the aching a tad bit more tolerable.

“Your hand is bleeding,” Armin points out in a serene voice as he walks towards you, his footsteps seem lighter than a feather in an attempt to not spook you away, as if you were a wild, injured little animal, “How did that happen?”

“I cut it,” You respond, dryly. Your lower lip quivers as you open your palm, revealing the smallest piece of green fabric. It is clear from the patter and the design that it came from one of the cloaks owned by the Survey Corps, no extra words are needed for all present to understand that it belonged to their fallen Commander. Though no one desires to talk about it, Reiner decides to take the fall.

“I may not have been so gentle when we were boarding the flying boat,” he says, using his left hand to scratch the back of his neck while the right one holds onto the rail above his head, “I’m sorry, y/n. I should have been more careful.”

You know what he is trying to do. It is clearly a lie and there is no denying any of it, but you appreciate his efforts to remove the attention from the sore subject. You purse your lips in what could be considered a small smile while quietly nodding your head.

“Would you mind if I took a look at it?” Armin asks, kneeling beside you while reaching his hand underneath your own. Perhaps he was right to treat you like a spooked animal, seeing as your immediate reaction was to move your hand far away from him, clinging onto the fabric for dear life as you push your body towards the back of the ship until you collide with the metal wall. “Please.” He begs.

“No,” you cower away, “This is the last part of me to have ever touched her. It doesn’t hurt, in fact, I can barely feel anything anymore.”

Once more he asks, “Please,” and you realize he isn't going to let the subject go. So before too much of your blood has a chance to soak the bit of cloth, you switch it towards your other hand, extending your injured arm until it touches the top of his thighs.

You whimper as a stream of clean water comes in contact with your open skin, dirt debris being washed away by the contents as best as possible. Your eyes never leave his face, the now 15th Commander of the Survey Corps taking care of you, your heart gets heavier the more you think of him in such a manner. His shoulders are slumped forward, as if there is a “not so fictional” weight on them. It doesn’t take long before he is finished bandaging you up.

“I am fully aware it is not the same but,” a masculine voice comes from the front half of the ship, “you still have us.”

Your eyes now meet Levi, whose crossed arms and stern face somehow brings you the slightest amount of comfort. With a helping hand from Connie, you make your way towards him, gently placing yourself between Pieck and the black-haired man, who ever so gently places a comforting hand behind your back. It is rare for him to demonstrate any sort of affection, so by the way his fingers feel against your clothes, you can nearly feel his own grief. Another lump forms in your throat, but you swallowed it this time.

“We’ll make sure that Hanji’s death wasn’t in vain,” Mikasa swears, false determination taking over her words, “We’ll return Eren into his old self, I know he is still in there somewhere, just waiting for us.”

Any sort of emotion gets drained from your face as you stare deep into her eyes, gray orbs looking deeply at you in hopes of any approval of her message. You raise your chin as you cross your legs, bringing your body forward, closer to her. You don’t want to be mean, nor do you want to make her feel like her attempt at comforting you fell into deaf ears, but all present right now know that what she has said is bullshit. 

“Mikasa,” your voice is stern, “do you remember what Annie asked you once in the forest and then again after we attempted to communicate with Floch?” She doesn’t respond but, by the expression on her face, you realize that she knows exactly what you are talking about. With no indication that she plans on acknowledging the subject, you continue, “She asked you if you would ever be able to kill Eren.”

She looks away, gripping her knees tightly. “That won’t be necessary!” Armin says, the nervousness in his voice is palpable as he desperately tries to change the subject while still hoping to provide you with the comfort he knows you need at this moment.

You sigh before continuing, “I know you want to bring him back. I may know that better than anyone else at the moment. But I need you to listen closely as I tell you this,” Your voice is louder than the engines, the tears begin pooling in your eyes once more, you bring the small piece of Hanji’s cloak towards your chest, a determined expression on your face, “There is no bringing him back at this point. He has gone too far. Even if you did bring him back, the remaining world population would kill him with their bare hands.”

“Why are you saying all of this?” Someone asks, though your mind has become nothing but fog so you can’t quite tell whose voice it is at the moment. You take a deep breath, allowing the cold air to fill your burning lungs.

“Because no matter what you all say,” any emotion is drained from your voice, “my final mission is to kill Eren Yeager.”

“If I could do it all again

I know I'd go back to you”

[okiedokie-sophie]

Erwin I miss you sm....

[shiftingparadise]

hiiii! i missed it here in tumblr, i was gone for months because of uni things, and i missed your blog and your fics sm! :(( and since aot: bad boy was revealed, can i please request a levi fic? where reader was one of levi’s friends from the underground? but they’re not the closest? like they’ve always been a little awkward with each other? almost like they only hang out because they have mutual friends? but then isabelle and farlan died, so they’re forced to be around each other but now without the other two supporting the conversation so it’s all painfully, hilariously awkward ! ofc, this is a no pressure request as always <3 have a great day!!

So, I'm not very good at funny story or jokes but I tried to stick as close to your request as possible and I really liked writing it, so thank you for this beautiful request and for your patience 🤍✨

Warnings: none

Word count: 1466

“Right, I’m going to the bathroom. Be right back”, Farlan let out a tired grunt before he stood up. “Okay”, you mumbled as you crossed your arms, your head resting against the wall behind you. 

Why? Why was it always so painfully awkward when you were left alone with him? You two known each other for years by now and yet … 

Your train of thought got interrupted by Levi slurping his tea. “Nice tea?”, you awkwardly asked, almost immediately regretting it. “Tsk”, Levi’s eyes glided to yours. There was an annoyed expression on his face, like usual. You cleared your throat in response. Anything was better than this silence. “Sick?”, his voice teared through the dense atmosphere. “Huh?”, your brows pulled together. “Your voice… You sound sick”. “Wow, thanks”, you narrowed your eyes. 

You didn’t know back then. That he meant to show you he cared. 

“Levi! Y/N!”, Isabelle’s cheerful voice greeted your ears. “Isabelle”, you happily smiled back as relieve flooded over you. There was nothing, absolutely nothing, more dreadful than being alone with Levi. Not because you didn’t like him, but you two just never got as close. “Isabelle, finally!”, Farlan brushed through his hair, “We’ve been waiting for you”. “Yeah, I’m starving”, you pouted. “Everyone’s always starving in this hell”, Levi coldly added. “Oh, come now Levi”, Farlan smiled, “It’s not that bad as long as we have each other”. Levi didn’t respond, instead a small and obviously uncontrollable smile appeared on his face. “Here’s the bread”, Isabelle threw a bag on the table. “H-huh?’, you frowned as everything washed away before your eyes. As if you were looking at a wet painting. 

‘Wake up”. “Y/N, wake up”. 

That voice… 

“Wake up”. 

“H-huh?”, you slowly opened your eyes. “It’s almost 10 AM, we got to get going”, Levi coldly replied. “W-where-“. “We’re leaving today for another mission”, Levi frowned. “Right, sorry”, you immediately sat up straight. “I’ll be down in five”, you softly responded before getting out of bed. “What were you dreaming about anyway?”, his crescent shaped eyes coldly staring into your tired ones. “Nothing”, you lied. “Nothing, huh?”, his hand resting on the door. “Then why’s there a tear on your cheek?”. 

A tear? 

“There isn’t”, you quickly wiped it away. 

Right. It wasn’t a dream. It was a memory. It was the last time you were all together in the Underground. The four of you. Before Farlan and Isabelle… 

“Wait”, you shook your head. “What the hell are you doing in my room, Levi?”, you raised your voice. “Someone, I mean I saw-“, Levi struggled to put out a sentence. “What?”. “Erwin asked”, Levi pinched the spots between his eyebrows. “Erwin asked where you were, so I came to check up on you. Thought you were dead at first-“. “Dead?”, you widened your eyes. “Yeah, found you with your mouth open, you looked pale and-“. 

Ah, yes. You could see it in his eyes. The moment he realized he was almost insulting you. 

“N-no, not that you look bad, just sick-“, he widened his eyes. “Wait, not necessarily sick-“. 

Levi wasn’t normally like this, but you were the only one that was left. The only one he could rely on.

“Right”, you turned your head. “See you in five, Levi”. And just like that, he left without saying another word. 

---

Levi looked at you from the corner of his eyes. You were both sitting outside, sipping from your tea. It was awkward, like usual. The two of you never seemed to get too comfortable around each other. You grabbed your cup and brought it to your lips, sipping. You cleared your throat, trying to make the silence a little less awkward. “Weather’s been nice lately, hasn’t it?”, he awkwardly looked at the sky as there was once again a painful expression on his face. “Yeah”, you stared into the distance, “No rain, right?”. “Right”. 

God, you really hated this. 

“Levi, Y/N”, Erwin’s stern voice came from behind you two. 

You noticed that Levi relaxed his shoulders, as if he was happy to see someone else. 

“Hm”, you coldly looked at him, “What do you want?”. 

You still weren’t too happy about being forced into the corps. After all, you blamed him for their deaths. You noticed Levi had started to warm up to him. You noticed their late-night talks, the way Levi’s eyes lightened up a bit when he talked to the Commander, Hange… Something you couldn’t understand. 

“I was wondering if I could join you two”, a kind smile on the blonde’s face. “Hange’s studying again, and the cadets are already in their rooms, so-“. “Whatever”, you rolled your eyes, “It’s not like we have an actual choice”. 

Complete silence. 

“Did you try my tea yet?”, Levi was the first to speak. “Yes”, Erwin smiled again, “It was delicious”. 

So, he could talk to the person who was responsible for the deaths of your closest comrades, but he barely managed to form a sentence when he was alone with you. 

“Right”, you chuckled. “I’m going to bed”. “Y/N”, Erwin called out your name, “I’d like you to stay. We can get to know each other a little more like this”. “I don’t want to-“. “Sit down”, Levi looked at you with an unusual expression, “Please”.

You couldn’t and didn’t want to understand why Levi got along with the commander. 

“No”, you coldly looked into his eyes. “Night, Levi”. 

“She blames me, right?”, Erwin looked at you as you walked towards the building. “Yes”, Levi took another sip of his tea. “Do you?”. “Yes”. “I see”, Erwin stared at his hands, who were resting on his knees. “And no”, the dark-haired sighed. “It wasn’t your fault, but if you didn’t drag our asses out of the underground…”. “The military police would’ve caught up eventually and thrown you all into jail”. “I know”, Levi stared at his commander. “Give her time, she’ll understand”. 

--- 

You were sitting in the cafeteria, staring into nothing. You didn’t know how you felt or what you felt. You just felt empty. 

You sighed when you heard someone open the door. You weren’t in the mood for company. “Tsk”, Levi clicked his tongue as you ignored him. 

“Good”, you thought, “It’s just Levi. It’s not as if he’ll start to make some conversation”. 

“Huh?”, you tilted your head as he sat in front of you on the table. “Here”, he frowned as he placed an apple in front of you. His voice sounded unsure. “An apple?”, you looked at him with a confused look. “Haven’t eat-“, his voice died away, so he cleared his throat before trying again. “You haven’t eaten all day”, he awkwardly looked at the ceiling. “You noticed?”, your voice quiet. “Of course”, his eyes found yours. He seemed a little insulted by your response. “An apple?”, you studied the fruit in front of you. “You like those”, he sounded unsure, as if he was asking you. “I do”, you gently grabbed it. “I bet Farlan would’ve scolded you for not eating all day”, he smiled. It was the first time he ever spoke of them after their deaths. “Farlan?”, you widened your eyes. “And Isabelle would probably try to make that shitty bread as tasty as possible for you”, his smile widened. “She was always so concerned, right? Farlan too, of course”, his eyes suddenly locked into yours, his smile fading. 

You didn’t know why. You didn’t know why you were crying when you thought all your tears were dried up by now. All the hurt, all the pain… You thought it was enough, that all your tears were used up. 

“You’re not the only one who misses them”, he looked at how your tears fell onto the wooden table. “But as long as we’re alive, they won’t die. They live on, inside our memories. We can tell others about them, about the stories in the underground. The good ones, the bad ones… We keep them alive inside here”, he pointed towards his heart. “I miss them so much”, you cried out. “I miss the way Farlan brushed through his hair, or how Isabelle called you ‘bro’. I miss the way they smell and, and-“, you wiped your tears away as you tried to catch your breath. “I know”, his voice sounded so warm as his arms wrapped around you. 

You never realized how warm he was. You’ve never been this close to him. 

“I’m happy you’re still here”, he tightened his grip, making it feel as if he needed this as bad as you. “D-don’t leave me”, you sobbed into his chest, “I-I don’t want to lose you too”. “I won’t”, he sighed. “I promised them that I’ll keep you safe, and I’m not going to break that promise”. 

[oorusandei]

okay but the ackerbond is so beautiful, and you can't deny that however you see this bond, platonic, romantic or otherwise, it's absolutely amazing.

erwin gave levi something to follow, something to believe in, a purpose.

eren gave mikasa a home, warmth, safety.

uri gave kenny kindness, hope, a new perspective of the world.

with the ackerbond, both the ackerman and their liege grow in strength. they make each other better. they're each other's missing piece. without the ackerbond, the ackerman is left hollow. (eruri </3)

please i love the ackermans sm

[rinamars]

do u think you would add itsuomi from a sign of affection to your list erwin coded characters?? like... idk but he gives off sm erwyy vibes somehow ughh-

on that note, i hope ur doing well :)

oh man i loooove a sign of affection!! i kind of see your vision, anon, idk if i'd add him to the list of erwin coded characters, but oh, some of the vibes are definitely there!!!!

maybe he doesn't have enough old man energy imo, but also he's just Too Cool, y'know? i like my erwin when he's a bit of a loser, in a sweet and endearing way 🤭

i'm doing well, my dear, except for the usual exam stress, but other than that all is well <3 i miss writing though sjdjdjdjdjd but tonight i'll make time for it!!! how about you, dear, all well?

[seeingivy]

ronnie I LOVE your new fic idea for eren and y/n (singlehandedly curing all of our dehabilitating academic validation 😔) i don't know if you know who @bloompompom is, but one of her stories is a eren y/n lab au and your story reminded me of it SM

and how was ur finals week? mine is going on rn and killing me 😭 i think i remember you mentioning graduating a while ago but i don't know if it was for you or just working there, but congrats on the end of the school year anyway!

ALSO i JUST began reading your sukuna fic despite not having watched jjk and the butterflies are INSANE (my cousin keeps telling me to watch jjk lmk if i should!) and tell me why i searched up who geto is and went 😳 (nanami kind of reminds me of erwin but idk if its j me?) im going to miss method acting so much pls keep giving us crumbs 😭

anyways sorry for the long yap i hope i'm not bothering you 😭 but i reallly enjoy your writing style one of my favs on this app, can't wait to see what you write next!!

much love, vie <3

hi pookie!!!!!

i have not heard of that writer or that fic, but i've added it to my list as a recommendation!!! but i will read it after i write mine bc i have a debilitating fear of plagiarizing to the point where sometimes I can't read fic on here bc im scared ill accidentally get so inspired I steal an idea without meaning to 😭 so i'm going to read it after!!!

my finals week was actually an attempt on my life. like I full on got a fever at the end of it and was out for a week. I didn't graduate (I have a year left!) but I did mention that i was at our graduation ceremonies because I work with our student first aid team and we deal with all the medical calls with public safety. and I hope your finals went well and you're getting some much needed rest!

WATCH JJK! (but beware it's like straight pain)....also like ignore the fact that I took literally the worst character in that show and went actually you are nothing like this. like actually my sukuna is so ooc it's insane but I also can do whatever I want and I don't care

thank you so much for your sweet words and the yap!!! I always love to hear it, it makes my heart so so warm 💌

[mileswrldz]

my ops on ships!!

eremika - my otp. my everything. it’s been two years and i still fucking cry over them. it’s to the point i see a field and i tear up. the dynamic that eren loves her more than everything and more than mikasa loves him. still mad at mappa for not animating them holding HANDS. i’m gonna kms when the end gets animated /j

aruani - THEYRE SO CUTIEJAJDJJSR i cant they’re literally so cute i love them and they’re dynamic and how armin fell for her and always visited her. HES SO DESPERATE FOR HER GODDDDD.

eruri - my other otp. there is absolutely no way they didn’t have a secret relationship going on. levi was always by erwin and even told him he’d follow him to hell. just like mikasa loved eren and protected him, levi did the same for erwin. THEY WERE LITERALLY ROOMMATES AND THEY DID EVERYTHING TOGETHER. levi trying everything in his power to stop erwin from doing the mission and wanting to immediately revive erwin. ENMIES TO LVRS IS MY FAV TROPE!! and their size difference is so cute GOD i can do a whole analysis.

yumihisu - MY BABIESSSS. the first aot ship i ever loved. they r literally gfs and in love. ever since ymir died historia was never happy. she doesn’t even love her husband. they were everything. i was a mess when ymir died.

jearmin - THEYVE LITERALLY HAD SO MANY INTERACTIONS. jean always has his arm around armin in some way. and they are always like touching in public it’s so cute.. and their size difference is adorable too. i’m a sucker for it.

levihan - i don’t ship them, i see levi as mlm and i cant rlly see hange w anyone. they are platonic soulmates to me tho!!

eremin - i def respect it, I just don’t rlly ship it. But I understand why people do, they’re rlly touchy w eachother. i’ll def write for it tho!!!!

reibert - i cant see it 😭😭 (will write for them tho)

jeanmarco - they were cute, it’s kinda meh tho marco was kind of a background character tho, i didnt rlly care when he died

ereri - absolutely not. you disgust me if i ship this. idk why this ship was and is popular. eren and levi have a father son relationship. will most definitely not write for this ship!!! i hate pedophiles!!

erehisu - no no no no no absolutely not stfu if you ship HISTORIA IS LESBIAN!!!!! it genuinely makes me physically ill whenever this ship is mentioned i hate it so much.

jeankasa - at first i didn’t like them at all, but they’re def an after war ship for me. i can see them together after the war, and i don’t have problem with it at all. during war i don’t ship it tho cuz it was heavily one sided

zevi - be so fr, (crackship tho)

flojean - anyone with floch is a crime

levi and petra idk their ship name - daughter/father relationship. she looks up to him like eren looks up to him. levi is mlm in my eyes.

sasha and connie - absolutely no for romantic but they are most definitely twins. they break my heart sm. connie loved her sm and def feels like half of him is missing :(

conkasa - crackship funny asf

mikannie - UGHHHH TOXIC GFS!!!!!!!!!!!!! wish they ended up together after war

sasha x niccolò - their dynamic is so cute. niccolò getting flustered over sasha is adorbs to. connie def hyped them up and if they got married, he’d be flower boy.

gabi x falco - CHILD LOVERS SO ADORABLE. MY BABIES. they both protect eachother i love them

reiner x historia - be SOOOO fr..

jean x pieck - where did this even come from

eren x annie - where did this even come from

hitchannie - toxic gfs 😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈☝🏻☝🏻☝🏻

mikahisu - ok they’re kinda cute… def prefer mikasa w historia over that farmer mf

[rivangel]

I would love love love an eruri snippet if you’re up to it! I crave emotionally vulnerable Levi and Erwin being especially gentle with him because he sees how he’s struggling to let said vulnerability show. Ugh I’m just such a sap for Levi crying in front of Erwin and Erwin making everything a little better ❤️ Your writing is always so engaging and I love how you write them 😭

hehehe sooooo this turned into more of a snippet kfgkksjd. i crave emotional levi and gentle erwin too, so i hope you enjoy!!

about: Years down the road, Erwin has to make a visit to the Underground, which stresses the hell out of Levi. He's so weak... right?

//massive hurt/comfort, Levi is traumatized (who's surprised), canonverse, established relationship, Levi being vulnerable>>>, disturbing topics | 2.0k

Fucking Nile. If Levi didn't know Erwin, he'd be angrier at him for this underhanded deal, especially with it having to do with the Underground. It's to get on Nile's good side. And being on the good side of the Military Police commander means funding.

It highlights the MP's cowardice, getting a squad of Scouts to do all the heavy lifting in order to attain a high-profile arrest Underground (Levi didn't get details, as if he wanted them) while the MP rakes in all the benefits. Like a heightened reputation among the pigs who practice politics. And as for the criminal?—Another will easily fill their place.

All lazy, inept bastards, every single one of them. Like one big happy family.

Erwin's alibi is rather simple. This is going down a few days before the bi-annual assembly in Mitras. That's how Levi ended up here, holed up in their hotel room while the action is happening below his feet.

Erwin has been gone since this morning, and it's probably late in the afternoon. He isn't sure, since he hasn't eaten since then, and though—on top of eating something—there's a hundred productive things he can be doing, he feels frozen in place in this armchair, basking in a trepidatious silence.

He's been hearing footsteps outside in the hall all day. Each one he measures in the back of his mind and registers as, Not Erwin.

All this alone time has at least given Levi time to decide whether he's grateful Erwin told him to stay (Levi would be recognized down there; rumors would inevitably sprout up of the retired criminal having relapsed on causing trouble), or troubled that he didn't go. Even though it would mean stepping foot there again, he doesn't like thinking about Erwin down there.

It’s not his first time, though. Erwin is fine, is going to be fine, obviously, but there is something about it that rubs him the wrong way.

Levi leans back in his seat and crosses his arms a little tighter as he gazes out the window, ambivalent to the rich city down below. People are heading home from work, and the late afternoon sunlight is casting shadows. Should be soon.

Slow footsteps, ambling their way down the hall.

Erwin.

Something in him relaxes, then leaps up as the lock on the door turns over, following the soft creak as it opens.

Levi inspects Erwin's appearance closely before Erwin even smiles and greets him. He's dressed the same he left this morning, shrouded in a long, nondescript cloak, and his uniform from the waist down, including the straps but missing his gear.

But he's filthy. Although it's slicked back, Levi can tell that the constant, stinking humidity got to his hair. Dirt, dried mud splashed on his white pants, some dark liquid—too dark to be blood but too congealed not to be sewage—splattered on his cloak (Said cloak is stringy and torn in a few places.), pants, especially his boots. Levi bristles at the thought, even though Erwin must've wiped them when he came in the building. They touched the Underground, therefore they're contaminated. He even smells very faintly of some sour, putrid dust-like combination that belongs only to the Underground. It makes him nauseous.

It's all like an ashen, filthy aura. On Erwin.

"Hello, Levi."

"You look like shit. Smell like it too," he snaps, unmoving. "Get in the shower."

Erwin looks surprised, not by the order, but his sudden and sharp aggression. Levi is telling himself that it's not Erwin he's mad at even as he acts like this, but it's not working.

"Don't you want to hear a debr—"

"No," he growls. He rises from his seat, ignoring his stiff muscles, and knocks the bathroom door to Erwin's side open with his heel. "You come back like this and think you have better things to do than get clean? You're disgusting."

Levi's glare could pierce skin. Behind his tone, Erwin senses a thinly-veiled threat that Levi wouldn't go through with. In fact he looks one more excuse away from biting his head off. The fact that he's making it at all means he's better off doing as he says without probing.

"Alright," Erwin says slowly. "Is there anything else you need from me?"

Levi doesn't relax, but at least his voice lowers. "Don't touch anything you won't clean after. You'll contaminate the bathroom."

Erwin nods again. "I understand."

"Tch, if you did, you wouldn't waste clean air asking stupid questions."

Levi continues cursing as he storms into the bathroom. He comes out with a towel, unravels it and lays it next to Erwin, all the while keeping his distance, he notices.

Levi takes a step back and crosses his arms. "Take off your shit."

Without moving from that spot, Erwin undresses, beginning with unclasping his cloak and unzipping his boots, followed by his straps and each article of his clothing.

Levi doesn't watch, and instead heads for the window near an armchair. He slides it wide open, and just stands, his back to Erwin until Erwin is finished.

"Anything else?" he asks.

"Go."

Levi is of course very passionate about cleaning, but this is obsessive, even for him. That worries him (Along with the fact that the room is untouched, and Levi was waiting when he entered. How long had he been sitting there?).

But for now, this is the right way to go about things. Levi couldn't radiate more standoffish energy if he even tried, but he seems calmer than before at least.

Closed in the bathroom, Erwin operates the knob that sends a harsh spray of water down on the tiled floor, and steps into the cubicle before it's lukewarm. In Mitras, the showers are always hot, but he both wants to be thorough, and get back to Levi soon. Something is deeply upsetting him.

When he's dried off and dressed in something more casual, he wipes off what he's touched for good measure, including the knob on the shower and the handle on the cubicle.

Opening the door, things look the exact same as he left them, except Levi.

Levi exists quietly whenever he's feeling "burdensome", Erwin knows that well. Upset, distressed. The last thing he ever wants is to be the center of attention, and the first is to be alone. In their case, that means hiding in plain sight.

Each piece of Erwin's clothes and belongings are individually enclosed in a thin, clingy wrap and stacked neatly upon that same towel by the door, including his boots. In fact, that entire spot where he came in smells and looks cleaner. Nowhere else.

The window on the far wall is still open, allowing the smell of the cool spring night to waft in. Levi sits there with his knees folded to his chest in front of the bed on the floor, apparently quarantining himself from the quarantine zone. He's expressionless.

Erwin frowns deeply. He approaches, but maintains distance. "I'm finished."

Nothing. And there's no work to be done that would allow them to quietly coexist together, or at least, not without leaving the room, which he won't do.

Step by step, Erwin approaches, and kneels down beside him. This position is unbecoming for either of them—high-ranking, veteran soldiers—but they aren't those two men right now.

Levi stares down at the floor in his presence, his bangs mostly obscuring his eyes.

"Look here, Levi, is this better?"

His empty gaze slides slowly over to Erwin's. With a blink, he's more interested in the floor again. He nods.

For several moments, it seems like there's something Levi wants to say, but it never translates to words.

Erwin offers him his hands palm-up to see for himself.

He raises his head and stares like he's never seen hands before. Erwin waits with unending patience, until Levi's fingers brush his palms, and with one finger, he brings Erwin's chin up, inspecting him for dirt.

He seems to approve. That is, he sits again and stares despondently ahead.

Erwin sits down next to him and asks, "Did neither of us expect this?"

He shakes his head, as if to rid himself of a thought, glances at the window, then back down again. His breath is getting labored

"It's over. It's alright." He hovers his hand on his shoulder, and when Levi doesn't react, he puts his arm around him. "That's over with. I know the air isn't as fresh in Mitras, but it's still nice, isn't it? The moon is out."

Levi stares out the window. He nods again.

He thinks he understands now. The presence of the open window reminds him that he isn't Underground, even traces of it is unacceptable.

Erwin looks where he's looking. "You will always have a view like this."

Levi takes a deep breath in, and then out, dragging his hands down his face. "I'm not stupid, Erwin. It’s the fact I’d gotten so weak without realizing it. Something... came over me when I saw you."

"The last thing you are is weak," he states firmly. He turns his head and props his chin on top of Levi's head. "You know, I've seen a few of the horrors there for myself, but that doesn't compare to surviving there. Moments that serve as reminders put one back on their guard. If you ever had to go back, I know you're strong enough to do it. But you don't, not ever."

"...Erwin..." His voice is so tight, like a dam on the verge of breaking. He trails off.

Levi worms closer to him, and when there's no more space left side-by-side, yet closer. Erwin carries Levi's legs across his own so that Erwin may shield him in his arms like he wanted to.

"Whatever you experienced, I would listen to you without judgment. You... must've been through so much pain."

“It…” Levi squeezes his eyes shut tight, willing himself to keep going, come to some conclusion. It's hard to pin down one reason, one story—it's all of it.

Levi works his jaw. “It… was"—his breath hitches—"hard."

The dam fractures, a well of emotion surging through, a flood. He loathes the sound of his voice when it shakes, and it's pathetic, pathetic to be rendered so weak.

Only Erwin ever finds a way to disarm and unravel him. He chose to sit here and tell Erwin about it, though he's only succeeded in crying like a whiny brat. Without admonishment, though, without praise—he carries this weight. He holds him as he stains his shirt with wet tears.

A moment is enough, but he can't seem to stop it. It's so intense that he can't even hang onto his embarrassment. He wants to sink into Erwin, or disappear through the floor, as long as these memories quit lashing his mind like whips. He grabs and pulls at his hair.

"It's alright, it's alright." Erwin rubs his back. "It's going to be alright."

He sobs. Even when his chest feels empty, utterly drained of sorrow, a weight sits solid where his heart beats. Will that ever disappear?

He has the feeling even if he screamed at the top of his lungs, it wouldn’t budge. It will always weigh on him, like his entire life weighs on him.

Almost, he resents Erwin for his feelings, because how could he do this to him? How could he tear past the defenses around his heart like this? Scarred so deeply it appears like leather, with missing pieces a select few people have taken with them when they left. When Erwin does, because he knows he will, his own life on the inside, won’t last long after.

His mind continues to batter him with vitriol. You’re so childish. You’re weak for this. This world doesn’t want you, and it definitely don’t care about you. Pathetic…

Those words are Kenny's.

"I can't take any of this back..." he whispers.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he whispers back. “I’ll sit with you until you feel better. Then, we can have tea. While I work, you can clean my things. It’s all okay. I promise you."

Erwin also succeeds by some miracle, to ease the weight with a remedy so simply as his presence. That's more than he ever could or would ask for in this cruel world.

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[asideblogofananimelover]

#hange levi and erwin are the councellors ❤️#im malfunctioning let them be happy#when someone ‘dies in battle’ they rlly just got hit in paintball and had to sit out#i guess im just missing when i used to go to summer camp#hange is def the councellor that is on bug removal duty because levi refuses to do it and erwin just kills them#hc that levi absoultely hates bugs sm#when someone gets homesick erwin lets them have an extra smore at the bonfire that night#if a kid gets hurt by falling over levi 100% tells them to ‘suck it up’ and ‘walk it off’#sasha will 100% steal your dinner or smore supplies out of your hands#someone always has to be on ‘sasha duty’ at meal times#armin is that one kid who passes out because it gets to hot#eren literally has to drag mikasa and armin into participating in camp activities#eren and jean got paired up on a canoe once and that didnt end well for ANYONE#canoes were banned for a week after that#connie and sasha will 100% chase other kids around with bugs. i just know it#annie goes HAM in kickball. she has never lost. mikasa almost beat her once but got distracted by eren getting in a fight#once some of the boys tried to come to the girls cabin during the night to scare them.#long story short. historia got scared and ymir almost broke someones arm#it wasnt pretty#aot#attack on titan#aot hcs#someone snuck fireworks in but i cant decide who#bertholdt is that kid whos like ‘tHiS iS aGaInSt ThE rUlEs’ whenever you try to do something fun#levi just KNOWS when someone tries to sneak out at night. he just ~appears~ behind them#reiner has def knocked over a younger kid on accident. multiple times. he just rlly beefy and doesnt pay attention#marco gets out first in every game they play. its getting sad at this point. annie pls stop tagging him first#ymir will def jump out and scare you if you try and go ANYWHERE in the dark#hange told the kids a scary story and armin/jean/and eren cried.#if theres a swimming race mikasa is going to win. idk she just gives me the vibes of a really good swimmer (via turnedinto-themoon)

I just had the thought of “aot summer camp au” and now this is the only thing I will be thinking of for the next week

[leyyvi]

I remember at some point in paychecks Levi mentioning that Erwin couldn’t have a sugar baby because he’d fall in love with them kind of deal. So my mind kinda ran with that randomly and I wanted to share, if that’s okay: what I’ve been imagining is him being like “mm this works for Levi, I should try it.” (He should not) And going on a website and getting the pro sugar baby. And like she can tell he’s never done this before but he’s so handsome and so fucking rich and NICE. So she makes an exception.

While she is the perfect companion for his business trips and giving amazing massages after a stressful day and is just everything he could ever want. So of course Erwin is catching feelings so fast and it’s the sugar baby who won’t commit. Cause it’s her job. So Erwin is like buying all her time. He’ll go bankrupt trying to have her all to himself. But Levi is watching all this like -_- “your an idiot.” (I’ve been in an Erwin pit after rewatching season 3. I’m just comforting myself, sorry.)

Oh my god this would've made such a great subplot I'm actually screaming while reading this? I love this wtf!!

"You're an idiot," Levi says as he's literally texting Reader hoping she had a nice day today and making sure she's eating properly pft. Levi will roast Erwin about being smitten even though he's in the same damn boat the little hypocrite!! God that would've made such a great contrast in character storylines you actually have such a nice idea here 😭

The irony of Levi constantly warning Erwin not to fall in love as he's doing it in his own way. The possibility of this sugar baby knowing/meeting Reader. (Plot twist it's Ymir's friend) The potential for tension and drama AGH thank you for sharing!!! I'm loving thisss