#i might have missed answering something cause i didnt answer them in order but fuck it

[itsfrenchfornothankyou]

okay so you said genuine question and im not from around here but i do have an answer! so you've unlocked an unskippable cutscene!

this is a much bigger topic than it appears on the surface, and i might be able to answer your question succinctly and briefly, but it would miss out on a lot of the stuff happening behind the scenes which is actually very important!

since this is going to be quite long (I did a rough notes on my thoughts and what i might say and it was almost 1k. so.) i am going to put the rest under a readmore

but now that you've clicked the button and commited, let's break this into parts for both our sakes.

part 1: moral purity and the loss of 'squick'

so there's been a fun phenomenon happening lately online, and it's the idea that you can assign morals by the type of things that someone likes. that the act of enjoying something or disliking something is an inherently moral act.

this in itself has a lot of reasons behind it, and digging through that history would be an essay in its own right, so im going to glaze over it. but the current state of affairs is that your own personal taste, be it in media, in people, or yes, sexual thoughts (even ones without actions) are in themselves, moral.

no matter the cause of these feelings, the outcome is this: if you find yourself liking or disliking something, there must be some reason behind it. if you find yourself grossed out by something, there is a moral and justifyable reason behind it.

this is, to me, related to the loss of the idea of a 'squick'; something that just grossed you out. 'squicks' didnt have to be triggers, they didnt have to be evil or harming you, they were a preference about something you just personally did not like.

now however, along with other terms, we have lost the idea of a 'squick' and so if you don't like something there must be a reason this thing is evil.

so now you have people seeing things like animal packers, and they are for some reason uncomfortable with them. where we might have once said 'oh well, not for me', we must now have a reason for why we are uncomfortable with this idea.

1.5: the perpetrator and the victim

in any given situation, to prevent discourse from becoming muddied or hard to answer, there must always be a person who is definitively in the right, and a person who is in the wrong.

this is a really normal reaction, it's hard to accept something as not having a clear answer, and so it's easy to find ourselves doubling down on something so we dont have to confess to the worst thing of all 'i dont know'.

Coming from disability advocacy, it's important to recognise that there are going to be situations which are not clear cut, in which nobody has done anything wrong, but people have ended up hurt or upset. sometimes needs and people are simply incompatible, and there's nothing wrong or evil there.

but that is difficult and scary, so instead it's much easier to talk about the victim and the villain. if someone is being hurt (i am looking at something that grosses me out) then someone must be intentionally hurting them (evil gross kinksters)

In this understanding of things, the discomfort itself must be harm done, and if harm is being done, then someone must be at fault. it becomes a matter of who is the perpetrator and who is the victim. So in order for them to be uncomfortable and not be evil themselves, the thing that is making them uncomfortable must be evil itself.

now that we've established these things we can actually get around to answering the actual question you asked:

Part 2: why zoophillia?

if this person has deemed the act that these people have done to be evil or bad, why not just call the act itself (which i am given to understand is hyper-realistic animal packers?) evil?

well what you surely understand, and somehwere in the back of their brain they understand, is that that's incredibly fucking stupid.

if you walk up to the average person and say hey, this person is doing this evil thing, and explain that, theyre going to think you're insane. so how are they supposed to tell the average person that this person is evil? they escelate it to most awful acusation they can think of in the moment.

in most communities, the terrible thing that they will accuse someone of is pedophillia, but in the therian circles, they dont need to escelate it to that point, because there is already a hot button topic they can point to instead.

Zoophillia, as i am given to understand, is one of the most hot button topics in the therian community. it is the group which is regularly aligning themselves with therians, that many if not most therians want nothing to do with.

it's also a group that is often conflated with therians, meaning that many therians have an immediate 'no fuck off that's not us' reaction to it, as a form of self preservation. because as soon as people have made a claim that you may be a zoophile, and you fail to respond in the appropriate way, you will be cast out of your own therian in group.

so the use of using zoophillia as an acusation is two-fold. for one, it makes people take the accusation seriously, and for two, it prevents people from doing their own research and looking into it.

because if you are told this person is evil, and if you support them you are also evil, at that point any questioning on your part is seen as complicity in evil acts. as apologism. this person is evil and if you ask my why, you must also be evil.

so lets circle back a little bit here, earlier i mentioned that the typical claim is pedophillia, which everything i said previously about evil acts is still true of, but you might not fully believe me about people escelating to the nearest most terrible thing they can think of, but the thing is that i have seen this before.

Part 2.5: tired asexual

hello again, youve probably never heard of me before, so let me tell you that I'm Asexual. more importantly, I'm an asexual person who has been on tumblr for a solid decade.

if you werent around in the mid to late 10s, you might not know just how bod aphobia on tumblr got, but i was there for it. and you know what the most common accusation of why asexuals, and anyone trying to discuss asexuality were evil?

because discussing asexuality was pedophillia.

yeah, asexuals. the well known 'lack of sexual attraction' community.

Now I can go into the series of claims that led to this, hell I could probably go diving on my old blog and find screenshots of these actual accusations, but that’s kind of besides the point. The point here is that the actual reasons people give for it being ‘insert evil thing’ are unimportant.

yeah, when i say it to you, a person who i am assuming knows a little something about asexuality, that that was the claim, your first thought is that that's an insane thing to say.

but for a lot of people the first time they heard about asexuality was in this discourse. so their brain is now primed to make the connection of 'oh, okay, asexuality is evil.' and now, when they see people defending asexuality, they're already defensive. they assume youre trying to trick them, or make them complicit.

asexuality is not the only place this tactic has been used though, you see it all the time. it's at its most common in things like homophobic legestation, anti-trans bills, or drag bans.

These people cannot justify the initial action as evil, so they jump to something you are more likely to agree with, and try to argue it is the same thing. this is what we call equivocation.

equivication is an incredibly effective tactic in fear-mongering, splitting up groups of people, and getting something innocuous labeled as morally wrong

'Think of the children' is a good example of this. No it’s not that im transphobic, it’s that I’m concerned about children. Therefore, if you’re arguing against me it must be because you yourself hate children and want harm to come to them.  

but not everyone is as obvious as to say 'think of the children' or some other line we've heard a bunch before. they find new ways to say it, and because the current safety tactics are to watch for certain phrases and words, people dont know how to look for underlying beliefs and sentiments, leaving people more vulnerable than ever to this kind of manipulation.

so now i've hopefully answered your initial question of 'why zoophillia', i want to take this a litte bit further and ask, 'what is the end goal?'

part 3: what next?

okay so would you believe me, if i said that until now ive actually been taking an incredibly good faith reading of the discourse so far?

currently I have been presenting this as a misdirection of discomfort, but not necessarily actively malicious. now however, i want to go back to the ace discourse.

bigots on tumblr weren't actually starting shit with the ace community because they really had a bone to pick with asexuals, they were doing it because they were transphobes. Surprise!

this isnt speculation on my part, transphobes have since openly discussed that they used aphobia as a kind of 'gateway' to 'gatekeeping'

if they come out of the gates talking about how 'transexuals are evil' and should be 'kicked out of the lgbt community', then they would be immediately revealed as transphobes and most of the queer community won't listen to them. these transphobic talking points have been around long enough to be identifiable and more easily discussed.

asexuality however was, particularly at the time, very under-discussed. it also wasnt a part of the 'standard' LGBT acronym, which made it easier for them to make the argument that asexual people should not be allowed to be considered part of the community.

aphobia at the time was considered less divisive, you could be more easily convinced that this community you have never heard of is evil, dont question it. theyre pedophiles and groomers, if that isnt enough to convince you theyre evil it must be because you're also an evil person, so don't question it or do your own research. then we might come for you.

This was wildly successful! And now that that campaign has gone so well, they can now openly admit that they were secretly transphobes all along! And wow, you already aligned with us, so you need to double down on hating trans people because the rest of the queer community doesn’t want you back after that bullshit!

now maybe you consider this to be a particularly poor faith reading of the current discourse. maybe i had you in the first half, but all of this stuff about secret transphobes and conservatives playing along in ways that are more acceptable seems a little far fetched and conspiratorial to you. a bit of equivication here and there isnt inherently a sign of deeper sinister intentions. isnt all of this a bit of a stretch?

and maybe youre right, maybe im just someone who has seen something similar play out before, and im jumping to defence at something that wont become the same issue.

but isn't it interesting that the people being most vitriolistically upset about all of this, and attacking the creator of these things and accusing them of zoophillia are also misgendering him?

[Tw: Zoophilia mention]

Genuine question: WHY do so many people in this community jump on everything they find weird and immediate label it as zoophilia?!

Like- animal packers, fantasy toys, yiff art, pet play, kink gear, LITERALLY ANYTHING.

Seriously, relieving dysphoria, having "dirty" urges related to your identity, even straight up liking some freaky shit does NOT mean someone is attracted to animals. And it definitely does not mean they are actively harming/thinking of harming real animals.

People really take whatever is too weird for them and try to accuse it of war crime. Be better y'all.

[sailorhyunjinz]

Do you write yandere? If so, can I request skz yandere headcanons on how they would react when S/O rejects them because she doesn't wanna deal with whole drama that would come with dating an idol?

i mean kinda?? i have a seungmin yandere fic in my drafts sooo BUT YEAH

oh also, requests are not open but im just gonna do this one cause headcanons are kinda fun BUT REQUESTS ARE CLOSED <33

also why is the felix one so short-

Warnings; yandere!skz, rejection, k-dnapping, slight gaslightning or like manipulation, restraints, threats, aggression, mentions of masturbation, stockholm syndrome

Chan

nobody rejects him. nobody.

you two were friends from school and you were sooo happy when chan made it as an idol, finally persuing the dream he had been yapping on about for years. 

but in the midst of that he realized that he had feelings for you, he missed you all the time, just wanting to hang out with you and maybe explore the things he had on his mind. so,, he decided to confess when you guys were at a cafe.

“look y/n,,, there’s something I wanna tell you” he started to which you tilted your head

“nooo,,, are you guys going on a tour again,,, i wil miss you sooo much channie” you said with a pout but the boy shook his head.

“i like you y/n” 

your mouth stood agape, this was not what you expected and truthfully,,, not what you wanted. 

“chan,,, y-you know thats not possible” you said with a frown, looking at him straight ahead.

“of course it is,,, why wouldn’t it be? w-what are you trying to say y/n?!” his voice started growing louder, you looking around in order to see that people werent turning their heads towards your table. 

Minho

you have made a big big mistake my friend- 

wont even hesitate to keep you hostage in his basement LIKE IM NOT JOKING-

might just tie you up and like,,, not even do anything to you, just talk to you and admire you, maybe tracing your facial features and cuddle closer on the cold floor

just wants to keep you as a pet or smth and you are scared out of your mind cause you cant move cause of the restraints, you cant speak because you have silvertape across your lips that he only removes to feed you but if you start screaming you wont get any so you deicde to just stay calm and quiet before someone saves you and play along. 

i mean you do,,, kinda fall for him but you know you cant,, but you cant help but to fall for him and miss him whenever he’s out on schedule things

he always returns to you and you get so happy when you see the little crevice of light from outside when he opened the basement door

whenever he lies next to you, you put your head against his shoulder and take in his scent the best you can

he told you everyday that he would let you go if you agreed to date him but you shook your head,, maybe cause you liked being his prey. 

Changbin

he’s more of the threatening type of yandere,,, like,, not that he’s violent but if you try to block his number he will create new ones and keep on sending you messages about how you have betrayed him and how he wished that you loved him back and all that,,,,

you guys often meet because you go to the same college and are students in the same department sooo,,,, avoiding him is pretty impossible 

he stares a lot at you,,, you guys have a couple of classes together and he just stares the entire time, his eyes are just filled with revenge, he somehow wants you make you his, own you but he doesnt know how yet, for now he can just look.

watch this fucking message conversation just be this;

[why did you talk to him during class?]

[you could have just asked me]

[nobody loves you like i do. no one y/n]

you are never getting rid of him basically,,

he’s gonna get to you first ;))

Hyunjin

i feel like he goes more to the stalking route than the kidnapping and drugging and whatnot- 

ok,,, you rejected him,,, but that doesnt mean you’re getting rid of him.

ohmygod what if he turns into a peeping tom- cause he obviously knows where you live. 

like yall were not even that close?? he just saw you backstage at one of the concerts and thought you looked good so he decided to go up to, you werent an idol so no problem he thought.

but he gets a bit too,, hasty with his decisions and often falls for people randomly and so when he politely greeted you and gave you his number you simply shook your head, explaining that this wouldn’t be possible since you worked in the same industry and you needed to stay clear out of any scandals in order to keep your job. 

no was not answer in Hyunjins mind. 

luckily he managed to catch your full name by flickering through some papers in an office and also saw your full adress there, knowing exactly what he was going to do on his free time. 

Jisung

if im being completely honest,,, i have no idea-

like,,, he gives me kinda pervy yandere vibes,,,

what if youre like his ex before he became an idol and now he wants to get back together with you-

oh,,, he masturbates to your pictures-

i feel like he always thinks about you, wondering what you like and wants to write songs about you but he doesnt do much-

but when he finds out that you have been hired by the same company as him to work as a like,,, economics accountant thingy he is all of a sudden vEEERY interested-

always asking the manager of when the group will have meetings with the accounting team,,, although they had nothing to do with them-

he just wanted to be in a conference room with you (and think pervy things about you in your tight office skirt and white blouse)

you went to the toilet on day and you saw him lurking around the same floor,,, WHICH ONCE AGAIN WAS NOT CONNECTED TO THE GROUP AT ALL- 

and idk,,, probably sneaks in with you and locks the door before you even react that theres someone else in the toilet- 

i feel like he’s pretty mild,,, but when he’s alone with you he is aggressive broooo

probably pins you to the wall and threatens you or smth along those lines,,,,,

(writing this is what my life has become to-)

Felix

“what do you think you’re doing?”

you turn around again, you had just thought of just leaving with a vague answer to his question but he was not having it. 

“answer.” 

his words sounded cold, his dark voice making an entrace, the exact one you’ve heard on many of the songs you listened to.

“felix,,, you have to understand,,, u-um,, if we date theres gonna be some issues” you said but he just stared at you with cocky eyebrows and a dark gaze, running his tongue on the inside of his cheek.

“do you think i care? would i ask you if i cared?” he said to which you shook your head automatically, what more could you do?

“you get until tomorrow to think and if i don’t get the answer i want well,,, we’ll see what i’ll do to you.”

Seungmin

he plots shit behind your back yk?

he’s more of the sneaky type of yanderes (oop spoiler to a fic heh)

like he makes this like fucking year long plan where the objective of the mission is to make you obssessed with him-

he starts kinda subtely,,, first its going to the same gym as you and like,,, knowing where you placed your stuff

and then he starts putting small notes like under your waterbottle when you went to grab something that say like “i think youre cute, call me” and then his number

you obviously dont react,,, because why the fuck would you contact a stranger at the gym 

BUT THEN you realize that its him, its mf kim seungmin. yo,,,, u didnt know he went to this gym,,, that was not,,, the best-

of course you got a bit interested,,, you wanted to know how he was off camera,,, like just in his everyday life and i meeean,,, he was attractive but obviously you should stay away bc,,, he’s a celebrity but seungmin didnt want to stay away

he notes somehow started to get more aggressive,,, suddenly being like “why are you ignoring me?” and such,,,

and one night you were left alone in the gym with him,,, it was sooo quiet, only the sounds of your strained breaths as you lifted a dumbell

here where the plan came to play ;))

Jeongin

he’s obsessed with you and you are not going anywhere, even if you rejected him. 

he’s more clingy?? LIKE HE WILL NOT LEAVE YOU

ok sure,, he falls more into the stalking category too,,, 

also veeeery much a obssessed kinda yandere,,, like his mind is not thinking about how to like capture you,,, more about how to make you soooo comfortable and fool you into loving him despite the circumstances?

i just imagine that you work in a cafe and jeongin often meets you there when he buys coffee and you are already in awe when you see fucking yang jeongin enter the coffee shop on your shift but you were even more excited when he leaves his phone number on a napkin and slides it over the counter before leaving. 

you thought about it,,, contemplating multiple times but,,, you decided it would be best not to since well,,, safety purposes 

but he would visit you and every day his face got more and more perplexed cause he wondered why you didnt call

mf would not leave you alone, he would even wait outside the coffee shop until you finished your shift and walk you home,,, so now he knew where you lived- 

and then do the same thing over and over again until you talked to him.

does. not. give. up. 

[threecrowsinatrenchcoat]

For One More Hour or One More Day

Dukeceit Week Day 6: Horror/Comedy

Remus and Janus work in IT, and Remus never fails to make Janus' life a bit more exciting than it should be. Janus wouldn't have it any other way.

AO3 Link: [here]

Word Count: 1416

Warnings: swearing, typical Remus-levels of implied sexual content. 

@dukeceitweek <3

-

[06032021 Network Node Down- 172.12.203.1 - Dee Why ]

Janus stared at the next ticket in his queue. He didn't even have to look at which tech wrote it. He just knew. He picked up his phone and dialed. 

“'Sup, DeeDee?" 

"Because they use ancient technology and refuse to upgrade, that's why." 

There was a beat of silence on the line. Janus didn't need to see him to know Remus was grinning like a maniac. 

“Oh, JD, I haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about," Remus said finally. His voice was laced with barely-contained glee. 

“Uh-huh, sure," Janus replied dryly. He watched on his screen as an incoming call diverted from his in-use line. "Do you want to clarify for me, in excruciating detail, what, exactly, it is that broke this time? After all, if it's something I can fix from here, it would save the company an awful lot of money. And you know how I love saving this company money." 

“You don't feel like taking work calls either, huh?" 

“Ree, I haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about."

-

[06142021 CRITICAL | Device failed Availability and Latency checks - Dispatch Requested]

Janus sat in his truck for a few minutes, cross-checking the address across his e-mail, Slack, and the ticket itself. And yeah, they all matched. This wasn’t a repeat of that time Remus had changed the address on the ticket from 96th St. to 69th St. as a joke. 

(Janus had almost gotten mugged. He was still a little salty about that one.)

But this time, all the addresses matched. The problem was, he was parked in front of a restaurant instead of the usual office building, and that just didn’t seem right. He opened up Slack on his phone. 

Janus D’lyre: Are you sure the address is right?

Remus Rey: Yeah, it’s right.

Janus D’lyre: It’s a restaurant. 

Remus Rey:  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Janus D’lyre: Are you positive it’s right?

Remus Rey: I just write the tickets, Dee, I don’t do a background check. Just go in.

Janus sighed. He got out of his truck, hefted his tech bag over his shoulder, and went inside.

It was a nice restaurant. Very fancy, with a goddamn chandelier hanging over the front lobby. Field engineers weren’t required to dress in a suit and tie, but Janus did by habit- and he was glad he did, because he would feel like a horrible slob standing here in jeans and a polo.

“Can I help you?”

Janus looked over to the host, standing at the counter with a bright smile that only looked 52% faked.

“Yes,” Janus answered. “I’m here about the network issues?”

“Oh!” The host- his name tag read ‘Patton’- brightened up a bit. “Yeah! Remus is waiting for you, this way!”

“Remus is what?”

It was too late. Patton had already darted around the counter and off into the dining area. Janus sighed and, regretting every life choice leading up to this exact moment, followed.

Sure enough, Remus was waiting for him. Patton led him to a quieter area of the restaurant, where Remus was sitting at a table. Well, sitting was a generous way to phrase it, because in reality, he was tipped back on the rear two legs of the chair, combat boot-clad feet up on the table. He jumped up eagerly at the sight of Janus, and somehow managed not to fall backwards and crack his skull open. 

“Hey! You made it! Thanks, Pat!” 

“No problemo!” the host replied with a grin before heading back to the front counter. Janus briefly considered that he might be having a fever dream right now.

“Remus, what the fuck?” 

“Told you it was the right address!”

Janus glared. “That is not what I’m ‘what the fuck’-ing you about.”

“I mean, I’d prefer me fucking you-”

“Remus.”

“Well, you work so hard, DeeDee,” Remus said calmly, as if he wasn’t standing in the middle of the fanciest restaurant on this side of town, dressed in his usual tank-top and leather vest combo and probably mashing dirt into the plush red carpet, and definitely doing something that should get him fired. “I thought you could take a break, and we could have a nice dinner.”

No, he wasn’t doing something that should get him fired. He was doing something that should get them both fired. 

“You’re joking, right?”

“Kinda a lame joke.”

“Remus, you had me dispatched to a random address for a fake problem, to have dinner with you on company time?”

“‘Course not, who do you think I am?”

Janus did not dignify that with an answer. He turned to walk away.

“Jannie, wait!” Remus darted around the table to get in front of him. Janus stopped, and glared. “This is Roman’s restaurant! It’s not a random address, he’s an actual client.”

Janus’ glare lessened. Ok, sure, they did have some smaller commercial clients. And sure, Remus had mentioned his brother’s restaurant was using them as tech support now after a bad experience with a different company. But- “It’s still a fake problem, Remus.”

A shit-eating grin spread across Remus’ face. “Nah. I unplugged the router.”

Janus snorted in a totally dignified manner. “You didn’t.”

“I did.”

“...Well, I suppose… I’d better investigate the issue. Couldn’t be solved remotely, hardware problem and all.”

Remus held out a hand. Janus took it, and let Remus lead him back to the table.

“Great, cause I already ordered!”

-

[06192021 Switch is problematic. Unable to get into the switch || Serial No. 111-0203-2018]

Janus very calmly cleared the ticket, set his work phone to away, pulled out his personal phone, and sent Remus a text. 

Jannie-D: I know you’re upset I didn’t let you fuck me last night. Get over it. 

Remster: i will not 

- 

Virgil Caligo: yo are u and remus like good?

Janus D’lyre: We had a small argument last night. Why?

Virgil Caligo: [image attached]

Janus sighed. Virgil had sent him a screenshot of a ticket update Remus had just posted.

[06292021 Ticket #00679 Update.] ‘The device is not only unresponsive to simple ping requests, but is being kind of a jerk about it. 100% package loss, a tragedy. Device was confirmed to be connected to a working power source, but they all say that, so who can really be sure. Dispatch requested, please confirm maintenance window. Actually showing up would be great, too.’

Janus hastily typed a message to Virgil. 

Janus D’lyre: Did you take that one?

Virgil Caligo: ya. logan didnt see dw

Janus D’lyre: Thanks. You can transfer it to me, I’ll take care of it. 

Janus leaned back in his chair and rubbed his temples. What a comedy of errors this day had been. It was the last time he’d forget he and Remus had a date night planned, that’s for sure. 

- 

Remus sighed when a priority ticket popped up in his queue. He was having a grand time ignoring his other queues in favor of sculpting a rather elaborate dick out of the green Play-Doh he kept at his desk, but he really did not feel like getting bitched out by Logan for missing a priority ticket. Grumbling to himself, he stuffed the Play-Doh back into its tub and opened the ticket. 

[06292021 Ticket #00679 Update.] ‘Likely a hardware bug. Possible remote fix with reset and reconfigure. Device information missing from online records. Please check file and update record.’ 

Fuck. Remus hated pulling files. What a pain. He trudged his way upstairs to the records room, which was always dark and depressing because nobody ever went there because who the fuck used physical paper in 2021?

But when he unlocked the door and pushed it open, the light was on. And every surface was covered in flowers.

“What the fuck?” Remus asked the flowers. They didn’t answer. But, at the small desk near the door, there was a stack of green boxes from his favorite bakery- and on top of that, he saw an envelope with his name on it. Eagerly, Remus tore open the envelope. 

Inside, he found a single sheet of Janus’ fancy stationery paper, the kind with the little holographic snakes along the edge that he only ever used for special occasions. And on that paper, one single sentence, penned in Janus’ elegant, flourishy handwriting: Ok, you can fuck me tonight.

- - -

[06292021 Ticket #00679 Update.] ‘I take it back, the device is no longer being a jerk, and I love the device very much.’ 

[infrequent-creator]

Busted

Summary: Japanese thief, Yume Iwao, is on the run to find a hiding spot. Little did they know, it was the League of Villains’ hideout. 

A/N: Ahhhhh this is my first time writing on here in a while. I made an OC who i thought would be cute with Shiggy. I hope you like them as much as i do! (chapter 2 has the tickles in it hehe)

Word Count: 1,414

TW: adults drinking, marijuana use, brief kidnap?

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

Sirens wailing downs the streets of Japan.

"Shit.." Yume whispered quietly. They pushed their black glasses up on their nose.

Clutching their backpack strap tight, Yume scanned for a hiding spot. They couldn't go home until dark, they lived pretty far. Plus, the police would surely follow them. Luckily the stores they knocked off were on the older side of the city. Most of the homes were condemned, so lots of homeless people used them for shelter. No biggie. Nothing that they couldn't handle, they've surely been through worse. Quickly digging through their backpack, they changed the hoodie they were wearing. Yume shoved the rest of their hair under the hat.

They settle on a house a couple streets away. Plus, they didnt even need to break anything to get inside. The back door was cracked open. Slipping inside, they let the door shut gently behind them. The air was somewhat stale and old, but it'll do. Walking a little deeper inside, they open the closest door. Flipping the light on, gasping as their blood runs cold. It's a bedroom. The room wasn't much, just a bed, a cage in the corner, a small table with a computer covered in notes, and a closet. Iwao needed to get out of there fast, before whoever lived here came back.

Suddenly, the back door opened. Yume froze in place.

"I told you, hot head, leave the pipe in the door when we go out. What if we lost the key?" a raspy voice spoke.

"Then you're even dumber than I thought, not that I'm surprised.." another low voice responded. Shit shit SHIT! They become frantic, quickly turn the light off again. Yume ran to hide inside the closet, leaned against the cool wood in the back of it. Their anxiety teetered on the brink of a panic attack. Air fills their lungs as they take deep, controlled breaths.

"Yeah yeah guys quit your bitching, I'll order food later. I'm gonna change first, this shirt smells like shit." Whoever lived in here, their scent was very pleasant. The slight sense of tea and old spice filled Yume's nose. They heard the bedroom door close, then some rustling. They slowly peak out of the crack in the closet door. There was a guy in the room, crouching by the cage.

"Hey buddy hey, you miss me huh? You miss daddy?" He cooed at the cage. 'Who was he talking to?' They wondered.

He stood up fully, gods he was tall. His scraggly light blue hair hung to his shoulders. He set his phone down aside, only to grab the bottom of his shirt. Yume's cheeks heat up as he pulls it off, but all that goes out of their mind when they feel something jump down onto their shoulders. Yume let out scream as they tripped over something in the closet, falling through the doors. They ended up face up at the ceiling, frozen. Suddenly, the man was on top of Yume, pinning them to the floor by the throat with 4 fingers.

"Who the FUCK are you and why are you in my room?!" He growled in his raspy voice, his red eyes dilated.

They stuttered as they spoke. "I-I'm sorry..! I was just-!"

"What's going on in there?" the second voice from earlier shouted from outside.

"Dabi get a rope and a chair, quick!" Panicked breaths fill Yume's lungs. There was the sound of the bedroom door slamming into the wall. Another man rushed in with the requested items. He was definitely scarier than the guy that had them by the neck. The thing was, the grip wasn't even tight. He was only using 4 fingers to hold their throat, maybe his quirk had something to do with that.

"What the fuck is going on here, Shigaraki?" Shigaraki...why did that name sound so familiar? Yume didn't have time for this, these guys were probably going to kill them, or worse. Which meant they had to act fast. They used their shoulder to shove Shigaraki into the wall. They rush to the door, trying to get past Dabi. Sadly, he was stronger than they anticipated. He dropped both items and grabbed them. Quickly, he threw their backpack to the floor, twisting your arm behind their back. Yume yelped in pain, trying to shake him off.

"Feisty little brat you found Shiggy, maybe they'd make a nice new Nomu?" Dabi growled in their ear.

"LET GO OF ME YOU FREAK!" Yume screamed. Shigaraki was on his feet, one hand on the chair. Dabi spun them into the chair, landing roughly. Both Shigaraki's hands used all his strength to hold their shoulder's down. Again, only using 3 fingers and a thumb on hold each shoulder. What was his deal? The two passed the rope back and forth around Yume torso, all the while they tried to wiggle free.

"I'd stop moving around brat, wouldn't want these fingers of mine to slip.." Shigaraki's raised finger gently teased the skin on their shoulder. Yume froze at the feeling, their skin was tingling, almost vibrating. It didn't hurt, but it was certainly a strange feeling. What kind of quirk was this? Not wanting to risk it, reluctantly they stop moving.

"Much better, now. Who are you...and why the fuck are you in my room?" he walked around the chair to stand with Dabi. Yume finally got a chance to get a good look at the both of them.

Fuck they were both terrifying. Yume felt their lip quiver, their eye glossing up a little too.

"Not talking huh? I'd reconsider that. We'd hate to have to use our quirks on you, brat." Dabi stepped closer to Yume, their struggling amplified. Suddenly, Dabi's whole arm burst into blue flames. They shrank away with a yelp, the flames inches from their skin. Yume closed their eye under the glasses they were still wearing. Dabi let his flames go out, leaving a stinging heat on Yume's cheek.

"The results could be dastardly..." Shigaraki's right hand slowly inched to Yume's face.

"W-Wait.. hey get away from me...don't touch me HEY!" Their eye open with fear. 5 fingertips touched on the lenses of their glasses. Before their eye, Yume's glasses turned to powder in their lap.

"Well well, look at you. Does that have to relate to your quirk? They might make an interesting Nomu yet.." Shigaraki pointing at Yume's eye.

"Y-yeah I can um, petrify things...anything." They explained softly.

"Interesting. Tell me brat, why haven't you used it on us yet?" Dabi cocked his eyebrow.

"B-Because...I don't like using it on people unless I have to. I mainly just use my bat." Nodding to their bat on the floor near their backpack.

"Really...such a shame. Now listen, if I don't get some answers as to why you're in my room..." Shigaraki quickly snatched Yume's backpack off the floor, dumping the content on the bed. "...or I'll start putting my quirk to use." He picked up one of their personal items, which just so happened to be their art tablet.

"Ok ok...jeez..my name is Iwao Yume. I'm here because I was hiding from the police." Making eye contact with their lap. Dabi laughed a little, causing you to look up.

"The police? What could a tiny thing like you do to make the police chase you?" He snickered. Yume huffed.

"Open the brown bag there...but anything in there is mine." Yume said assertively. Shigaraki grabbed the bag and opened it. Dumping it out, at least 200,000 yen fell on to his palm.

"Oh shit.." Both of them said under their breath.

"Where did you get this much money?"

"I robbed a couple stores in the same mall before the cops were called. Please, I really need it. I'll leave right now just.. please don't take the money." Yume's eye welled up with tears peaking in both corners. Both men looked at Yume, to tell the truth. They both felt a little bad, of course neither of them would admit that to each other, or Yume.

"No." Shigaraki put the money back in the bag and closed it. Yume looked a little startled, some tears dropping from their eye.

"N-No?" Yume asked, suddenly very worried.

"No, you can't leave here. They'll be looking for you. They find you, they find us. You're staying here tonight." As he spoke, he let all his fingers touch the rope.

Wait... WHAT?!

[negandarylsatisfaction]

[SUMMARY: Negans wives become jealous after he begins to like the new woman who has joined the sanctuary. Taking advantage of her innocence and English not being her main language, the girls plot against her, making Negan go back on one of his own rules.]

Got Negan speaking some spanish.

Smut

Negan and Valentina. PART ONE

"My oh my..." Negan squinted his eyes at the sight of you across the room from him. Not paying attention to who was watching you, you continued organizing cans of fruit as you were told to do that day.

"Is that the new chick you bought here this morning?" Negan looked over at Simon beside him.

"Yeah, I put her on supply duty. Her english isnt so good but she moves quick."

Negan looked back at you, your caramel complexion and long wavy hair catching his attention.

"And why the hell have I not been introduced to her?" Negan responded with a raised brow.

"You're the one who said not to bother you if I found people I felt could fit in here. Trust my judgement, dont you?" Simon asked Negan noticing he wouldnt take his eyes off you.

"Of course I do. I also trust you to tell me when a fine piece of ass joins us, she might want to join the others," he explained referring to his wives. His response causing Simon to shake his head.

"Ehh...shes a little different from the other ones buddy. That's why I didnt mention her."

"Different? How?" Negan asked with interest as he turned to Simon.

"Shes a quiet one."

"The quietest ones are the freakiest," Negan grinned as he chewed on a toothpick.

"What's her name?"

"Valentina," Simon answered crossing his arms. Negan slid the toothpick around his mouth with his tongue before pulling it out and flicking it to the side.

"I'll be right back," Simon watched as Negan made his way to you knowing exactly what he would try to do.

"Excuse me, Miss Valentina is it?" Negan spoke in a charming voice as you continued organizing the cans straight in a box.

"Shit, I dont think I've been properly introduced to you. I do run this place so I should know everyone here, shouldn't I?" Immeditaly you stopped what you were doing and looked up at him with a look of embarrassment.

"I did not know this was your place. My apologies." Negan frowned at you not expecting your politeness or being so attracted to the sound of your accent.

"No need for an apology, darling. Im Negan and it is my upmost pleasure to meet you." Negan spoke charismatically as he slowly checked out what was before him from head to toe. The look of innocence pulled Negan more towards you. Smiling at him you shyly crossed your arms not knowing what else to say.

"How about I give you a tour of my Sanctuary."

"A tour?" You answered with a puzzled expression.

"What's that?" You asked, not knowing too much English there was many words you did not understand.

"A tour, when someone shows you around. Shit, I'll be your personal host. What do you say, honey?"

"Oh, I guess. Yes." Your response exciting Negan.

Negan showed you the men at work, he showed you where everyone got together to eat and then he left his wives for last. He led you into a room with four women. Slightly confused by how they were dressed and how their faces changed when they saw Negan, you did not say a word.

"Dont be shy, sweetheart." Feeling his hand on your lower back as he gently pushed you close inside you smiled nervously.

"These women here are my dear, dear wives." Negan looked back at you to see your reaction. With a frown you looked at each of them as they stared back at you.

"Wives? All of them? I dont understand."

"Mmmhm." Negan bit his bottom lip with a smile.

"These women get special access to many things here at the Sanctuary and all they have to do is be my wife."

Negan explaining to you the rule did not notice the way one of his wives Sara, was looking at you. Right away you began to feel uncomfortable that this man had all these women, you were not sure if he was trying to come on to you with the offer.

"That is um....very nice-" you struggled to find the right words as you took a step back.

"I should get back to my work," Negan fully turned to you with your response.

"See that's the best part," he spoke in a matter of fact tone.

"As my wife you dont have to do any of that work, sweetheart." Standing still, you observed the way he looked at you. Clearly, he was attracted to you.

"In my country...we work for our needs. We work hard...nothing is for free."

"Hm," Negan responded as he looked down at you. He respected your way of thinking, if anything it made him more interested.

"I cant argue with that, darling." Negan winked at you as he stood beside you. The women watched the way he placed his hand on your lower back once again as he led you out of the room. You were the first woman to deny Negans offer but they saw the way he looked at you. They could tell he liked you and they didnt want to share Negan with anyone else.

The next few days you continued to work with the supplies as you had planned. Negan watched as you helped around with the kids, he thought you were a very sweet woman. He thought you had a softer touch than the others. Today you took a different task and helped with the cooking, you didnt notice how much Negan had his eyes on you. The man was captivated by your beauty. As you cut up the vegetables in the kitchen, Negan quietly entered. Humming to yourself, he entered the room and took it upon himself to stand beside you.

"Mind if I keep you company, sweetheart?"

"If that's what you like," your accent making him smirk. Negan leaned against the counter with his arms crossed, an amused expression on his face.

"What?" You looked up at him confused.

"Nothing...its just the way you speak."

His response making you frown, you weren't sure to be offended or not.

"What's wrong with the way I speak?"

Negan chuckled as he stepped closer to you.

"Oh...absolutely, nothing. I actually find it kind of..sexy." He answered with a grin making you look away shyly.

"I know men like you." Negan frowned as you responded with a soft voice.

"Men like me? What's that suppose to mean?"

"Que se-" you cut yourself off not meaning to respond in spanish.

"I mean-"

"Woah woah woah. What was that?" Negan leaned in closer to you.

"Were you about to just tell me off in Spanish?" He asked with half a smile, he couldn't deny it. The sound of you losing your patience in your first language aroused him.

"Please....go on," Negan teased.

"What I was going to say..was that-"

"In spanish, Valentina," the sound in his voice sounding like an order.

"Te gusta coquetear. You like to flirt...you chase after many women...womanizer."

"Mmmmm..." Negan bit his bottom lip and shook his body liking the sound of you talking in your language before he took another step closer.

"Well just for your information, Valentina. I dont chase after women, I flirt. But I cant help when a woman catches my eye like no other has..." His husky voice making you look up at him staring directly down at you.

"And I have to admit, you've really caught my eye." You could feel your cheeks begin to blush before turning away shyly.

"I better finish cooking." Nervously you responded continuing to chop up the vegetables as Negan remained beside you. Feeling his eyes heavily on you, you began to cut faster when suddenly you sliced your finger.

"Ow!" Negan turned serious at the sound of your scream.

"Shit." He instantly took hold of your hand taking a close look at your cut.

"I'm fine, I just-"

"Come here." Negan took you by your wrist to the table and sat you down across from him.

"Its nothing, Negan-"

"You cut yourself pretty fucking deep." Negan pulled out a small bottle of whiskey from his pocket and opened it with his mouth before quickly pouring some on your wound. You gasped trying to pull your hand back but he held you tightly.

"Easy, honey." Negan blew lightly on your wound as he looked at you and relieved the burning sensation.

"Better? Or am I going to get told off again in spanish?" Negan teased making you playfully scowl at him.

"Let me see this." Negan grabbed a cloth and patted it dry. Quietly you watched how gently he moved, how softly he touched your fingers. You had to admit, you were surprised to see a man like him move so lightly with his hands. He seemed so concerned with your wound. Sara, one of his wives unexpectedly walked in catching your hand in his as he treated you. Quickly you pulled away and stood up noticing the irritated look in her eyes.

"Sara, you need something?" Negan turned to her as she changed the expression on her face.

"No, we were just looking for you. All of us have been looking for you." Sara responded as you turned away wrapping your finger in a bandage.

"Alright. I'll be right there. You can go." Sara not liking his response turned and left the room as Negan stood up and walked towards you.

"You always carry a bottle of that stuff on you?" You asked with your back to him.

"Some times, never know when a pretty lady might accidentally wound herself." He teased making you laugh.

"I'm not so bad after all, am I?" His voice made you smile as you tied your finger up.

"You're still a womanizer," you responded playfully.

"Till one catches my eye." Negans tone wasnt as playful as yours, he meant what he said. Not knowing what to respond to that you changed the subject.

"Well thank you, even though it burned," you laughed as he stood behind you.

"I would've finished taking care of it if you didnt get up and run away so fast."

"Its okay, you're a busy man. Your wives are waiting."

"Let them wait." Negan responded not knowing Sara was hearing eveything behind the door. Never had Negan neglected his time with his wives before and they did not like this.

"I got it. Let me finish cooking, I'll see you around." You turned to him with a smile before continuing to make dinner.

Sara had already been complaining to the other women on how much attention Negan had been giving you. Not realizing just how much these women were growing to despise you, you went about your days not thinking of them. Negan on the other hand bought a smile to your lips everytime he came to mind. Everyday he took time out of his day to have some conversation with you. You would always catch him staring at you from afar, it made your heart flutter. He respected the fact that you didnt want to be one of his wives, that you werent like the others but that's what seemed to make him like you more. A couple days later you found yourself back on supply duty. Negan stood by the door as you marked off the number of each item on your clipboard.

"Everything going good?" The sound of his voice instantly make your heart skip a beat. Turning to him with a sweet smile he walked towards you.

"Yes, everything is great."

"Let me take a look at what you've got going on here." Negan stood right behind you looking over your shoulder as he read over what you had written down. The feel of his body so close behind you made your breathing begin to grow unsteady.

"Shit, this looks about right." He murmured behind you. Negan took a peak at the sight of your cleavage watching your chest rise and fall quickly, he could tell you were nervous with him standing so close.

"So, is good?" You questioned him before swallowing nervously.

"Valentina, tell me...how do I say 'very good' in spanish?" He asked close to you.

"Um..its muy bien," Negan licked his lips at the sound of your voice.

"Muy bien," Negans deep voice sent shivers down your spine, you had to admit he sounded smooth.

"Did that sound good?" He asked slowly, it was hard not to show how much you liked it.

"Mhm," Negan grinned behind you hearing the nervous excitement in your tone.

"How about..beautiful?" You suddenly felt Negans hand gently take hold of your waist making you softly gasp.

"Negan.."

"Say it." Taking a deep breath you hesitantly responded.

"Hermosa."

"Hermosa," he whispered behind your ear seductively, you could tell he was trying to turn you on and it was working until you remembered his wives.

"Negan-" you spoke breathlessly finally turning to face him.

"What are you doing? You know how I feel-"

"No I dont. Tell me again," his eyes were intense, he was turned on just as much, if not more than you were. His hands pulled you close against him as you looked up at him hesitantly.

"I'm not one of your wives...that's not who I am..we cant..-" you spoke but your eyes did not follow. He could tell how weak you were, how close you were to giving in to him. He leaned his forehead on yours, making you feel his breath touch your lips.

"Negan....I dont like being with someone who has...who has others."

"I havent touched them since we met," Negan spoke hoarsley. And it was true, the man couldnt bring himself to be sexually aroused by them with how much he thought of you since he met you. You found it hard to believe but it was true. Finally you both closed your eyes and let each others lips press against each other. Negan groaned with his mouth on yours, for so long he had been wanting to taste you. Not as one of his wives, not as just another woman he wanted but a woman he longed for. His lips trailed down the side of your jaw onto your neck as he sucked on it making you moan. Lost in the passion neither of you heard someone enter the room, that someone being Sara.

"Negan," her demanding voice making you jump back turning away from him as you fixed your hair.

"God dammit, what did I tell you about interrupting me?" He yelled at her in frustration.

"I'm sorry, I'll go." Embarrassed and angry, not expecting him to react this way, she left the room as Negan followed to where you moved.

"Now...where were we?" He pulled you against him making you put your hand to his chest to stop him.

"Negan no, I'm sorry. Those girls dont like me-"

"You think I give a shit?"

"Its not just that, I dont do this like this. I'm not one of them." You struggled to explain to the best of your ability in english. Negan felt frustration run through him, so turned on he could burst knowing he was so close to having you. So close until someone barged in and interrupted the moment. Negans breathing was heavy, you could tell how much he wanted you.

"Dont let her ruin what was happening between us."

"Its not her-"

"Then what the fuck is it?!" He suddenly yelled making you back away.

"You dont yell at me! Quien crees que eres!?" Negan raised his brows, a sudden smirk slowly forming on his face.

"So that's what it takes for you to talk to me like that huh? And what exactly did you just say?" Negan stepped closer as you crossed your arms holding the clipboard against you.

"Not that it matters because either way you sound so sexy..." Negan couldnt hide his arrogant and flirtatious side.

"Who do you think you are?" You repeated so he could understand.

"Thinking because you are the leader of this place you can yell at me or fuck me when you want-"

"Oh baby, talking dirty to me now?" Negan was amused by your reaction, his response only irritating you more.

"Alright, alright. I'm sorry." Negan finally gave in, as much as he liked the sound of you speaking in Spanish, he didnt like you being angry with him. As this whole time, you had never become angry with him.

"But if you must know, that's not the way I think, doll. I actually fucking like you." He admitted making you blush.

"Do I wanna fuck you? Of course I do, cant you see how fucking hard you have me? I can't lie about that but, I also fucking like you. Do you see me making any god damn time for my wives? Why do you think they constantly come looking for me when I'm with you?" Negan had a point, either way at that moment you didnt want to speak about it any longer.

"I think I should continue with my work, I'll talk to you later." Turning your back to him you continued to count over the items, Negan walked out in frustration cursing at himself.

Sara angrily ran to the other women and told them what she had just witnessed.

"So that's why hes barely been with us this past month, hes been with that broad," one wife complained.

"Hes never done this before when other women arrived, what makes that chick so special?" Another complained with frustration.

"I dont know but we've got to think of something to get rid of her. She needs to go." Sara responded when suddenly Negan pushed the door open.

"Sara, can I see you for a moment." Negan called out for her making her smile, not realizing Negan was in anything but a good mood.

"Yes, Negan," she responded happily as she closed the door behind her and faced him.

"Do me a favor dont fucking look for me unless I look for you. Dont ask of me, dont call for me, forget I'm fucking here. Understood?"

Sara's jaw dropped not expecting him to ever act this way with her.

"Y-yes. Sure." Angrily he walked off, only confirming the thought in her head that you indeed had to go.

Sara and the women had planned on introducing themselves to you, as they had never spoken to you themselves. As you finished organizing the supply room and locked the door shut you turned to find Negans wives standing outside the door.

"Um hi," nervously you smiled at them as you felt strongly that they disliked you.

"Hi, Valentina right?"

"Yes."

"My name is Sara, this is Susan, Sherry and Lisa."

"Hi, its very nice to meet you." You werent able to look Sara in the eye knowing she had just seen you and Negan together...kissing.

"I know, we havent really met..but why not right?" All the girls laughed simultaneously as you smiled awkwardly.

"We wanted to ask if you'd like to join us for dinner?"

"I-um sure," being completely caught off guard you weren't sure what to say. The girls happily walked with you to the kitchen and you sat with them quietly.

"Look Sara, about what you saw-"

"What about it?" Sara responded playfully.

"We've all been there with him, now it's your turn. Dont feel bad." She laughed as you felt a kick to your gut. You knew Negan had many wives and fooled around with everyone but you still didnt like hearing it.

"He did that with all of us, whenever one of us were new, we were his main priority for a certain time." She lied through her teeth, she knew none of them ever got personal treatment this way. She saw the disappointment in your eyes.

"Oh. I understand." Your expression quickly changing, the girls could tell you liked Negan and was hurt by what you heard.

Their plan of pretending to be nice to you to gain trust was working, the things they told you of Negan made you never want to speak to him. You felt like a fool falling for his words, how could you be so dumb? The man had so many wives and you for some reason thought you were special? Walking outside with them after dinner instantly caught Negans attention. He frowned and squinted his eyes from where he was watching you speak to his wives. Negan had a funny feeling about this and didnt like the sight of it.

"Oh shit, hes coming," you heard one of the girls whisper when Negan suddenly showed up before all of you, his eyes directly on you.

"Ladies."

"Hi, Negan," they all spoke together while you stayed silent making him step up to you.

"I dont get a hello, Valentina?"

"Negan," you muttered low making him look at the other women strangely.

"Valentina....I'd like to have a talk with you. Alone."

"I'd rather not."

"I didnt ask," he shot back making you look up at him. Looking back at his wives as Negan walked ahead, you could tell they were annoyed but, what could you do. Quietly you followed Negan far from where his wives stood before he turned to you with a very serious look.

"I dont want you talking to them."

"Why not?"

"Cause I said so. I dont trust it," you scoffed rolling your eyes.

"What dont you trust? That they're making me see you for who you really are?"

Negan frowned stairing down at you, his eyes looking directly into yours.

"What are they telling you about me?" He spoke low leaning his face close to yours.

Before you could respond Sara suddenly appeared besides both of you.

"Negan I have to tell you something."

"God dammit Sara, havent you learned-"

"I'm pregnant," you gasped at her words. A heart sinking feeling as you felt a knot in your throat. Sara was desperate to push you away in any way she could.

"Excuse me?" Negan looked at her puzzled as he walked towards her slowly.

"I-I should go." You began to walk away before Negan reached back and grabbed your arm without turning back to you.

"No Valentina. Stay right here. Now, what the fuck did you say, Sara?"

"I'm- I'm pregnant, Negan."

"Bullshit," he responded coldly.

"What the fuck do you think you're trying to do?" He spoke with a low angry voice, he knew exactly what Sara was up to and he wasnt going to let it happen.

"Its true, I am."

"I havent touched you in over a month."

"Did you forget that time in the supply closet?" She asked with wicked eyes, you looked away in shock, feeling disgust.

"Oh you want to play that fucking game with me?" Negan yelled at Sara charging towards her as she stared up at him boldly.

"Go back to the fucking room. Get the hell out of my face." Sara looked over at you in disapproval before storming off back inside. Negan turned back to find you with glossy eyes, he could tell you were attempting to hold back tears.

"Valentina-"

"I should've known. I knew you was a womanizer, a man with many-many wives." You struggled to express yourself properly.

"Val, shes lying. I havent touched her since I met you. I didnt want to."

"My name is Valentina," you snapped at him with your accent emphasizing on your name.

"And it doesnt matter, we are not you know...um a couple or whatever-"

"We can be."

"I dont want to be one of your wives!"

"I dont want you as one of them god dammit, I dont even want them!" Negan yelled making you silent. You didnt know what to believe with everything they had told you.

"I just want to go to my room." You responded in a calm manner as you looked away.

"Then go," Negan walked off angrily that you wouldnt believe him, angry that he ever lived the way he did at all. Quietly you went off to your room just wanting to cool off. Negan headed to where the wives were to discipline them and happened to walk into the hallway hearing them talk their next plan out.

"We have to get rid of her, hes not giving up on her and shes-"

"Shes not going to leave, she has nowhere to go, " Sherry responded.

"And Negan sure as hell wont make her leave. We're stuck with her."

"Unless......unless we do something to her." Sara suggested as Negan over heard with a straight face.

"What do you mean do something to her? Like hurt her?" Susan asked in excitement.

"Yeah, I mean, Negan wont know. He can just think it's an accident." Negan pressed his lips together angrily at the thought of anyone hurting you.

"What do you girls say?" Sara asked looking at all of them eager for a response. It didnt take long for them all to agree. Negan had a rule to never hurt women, but hearing them even think of hurting you made him want to bend some rules.

"We'll just get her one day while Negans out of the sanctuary. Trick her into being alone with us-" The women suddenly gasped at the sound of Negan entering the room.

"Negan, we weren't expecting you," Sara laughed nervously hoping he hadn't heard anything.

"Oh, I know that," Negan responded sarcastically as he stood before them.

"I needed to have a talk with you ladies. Now you ladies know what one of my number one rules are, dont you?"

"Yeah, to not do any harm to women." Lisa responded confidently.

"Exactly, now what are some things I hate?" Negan stepped closer in a very slow manner.

"Lies," responded one wife.

"Being crossed," responded another as Negan slowly pulled out his gun.

"Exactly! Now do you ladies know what this is?" They watched as he placed a silencer on his gun before pointing it at a random space.

"Is that a-" before Sherry could finish he pointed the gun at Lisa and shot her dead making all of them scream.

"So I heard from a little bird that you guys had a plan." Negan pointed again and shot Sherry.

"Shit-" Sara muttered in fear in shock at the cold blooded action Negan was taking.

Quietly you sat on your bed not being able to stop thinking about Negan. Were you actually starting to have feelings for this man? Maybe you should've let him really express himself to you, you knew those women didnt like you after all. With a sigh you stood up and decided to go find Negan and really have a one on one conversation with him.

Negan had by now shot down everyone besides Sara, terrified she put her hands up as Negan walked towards her.

"You thought you could cross me and get away with it?" Negan smirked as she shook her head.

"I...I apologize. I p-p-promise I wont-"

"A little to late for that dont you think?"

Walking towards the main room you could see the door cracked so you knew he was in there. Just as you reached the door you slowly opened it to a sight you would never forget.

"Ne-" you gasped just as Negan pulled the trigger and shot Sara through the head. You let out a scream covering your mouth in shock, Negan turned to you as you observed what was before you.

"Valentina," the look of complete terror in your eyes you couldnt believe what you saw. Visibly shaking, your eyes fell on him then back to his gun still in his hand. Quickly putting it away he took a step forward making you scream taking a step back. Negan could tell he had just instilled fear into you, fear of him.

"Valentina, sweetheart.. I can explain."

Not saying a word as you struggled to breathe you slowly took another step back before making a quick run for it.

"Valentina!" Negan yelled running after you catching you from behind in the middle of the hallway. You screamed as he covered your mouth and held you against him not letting you go.

"I'm not gonna hurt you!" He yelled as you cried trying to get away from him before he pulled you down on the floor against him.

"Shh, listen to me," his hand still over your mouth as he held your arms down around you.

"I had to do it," Negan whispered in your ear out of breath. He could feel you trembling against him, he hated knowing he made you feel this way.

"You think I wanted to do that? You know I dont hurt women but...those women wanted to hurt you. And I wasnt going to fucking allow that." You cried trying to push his hands away, you didnt believe him.

"I know you're scared but you have to trust me dammit!" Negan having more strength than you exhausted you, finally you gave up out of breath against him. Feeling you relax in his arms he slowly dropped his hand away from your mouth. Hesitantly you looked back at him in a way you had never looked at him before.

"No.. don't do that." He whispered looking down at you.

"Dont look at me like I'm a damn monster," you couldnt help noticing the blood splatter on the bottom side of Negans face before looking back into his eyes.

"You killed those women..." you spoke in a shaky voice.

"You werent suppose to see that."

Shaking your head in disbelief you kept picturing all four of their bodies laying dead on the floor. You couldnt believe the same man so gentle with your wound could do so much damage. You had no idea the kinds of things Negan had done.

"No....I-this isnt right.." you slowly began to push yourself away before quickly standing up and rushing off. Just wanting to get away from him you ran into a random room not realizing it was his bedroom. Before you could rush back out Negan entered and locked the door behind him.

"Now you're gonna hear me."

"Negan, please I want to go. Please." You began to cry as he walked towards you with deeply knitted brows.

"You think I'm gonna hurt you?" You couldnt look him in the eye as he stood inches away from you.

"Those women wanted you dead which is why they're dead and you think I'd fucking hurt you?" Slowly blinking through your tears you looked up at him hesitantly.

"Dead?" You whispered confused.

"Yes they wanted you dead and they were going to hurt you the next time I wasnt around and I would've killed them then too." Looking down you noticed the view of his gun, instantly making you uncomfortable. Negan followed your eyes and could tell it made you feel unsafe.

"You want me to put it away, then will you fucking listen to me?"

Without you saying a word he slowly pulled it out of his pocket and hid it in a drawer beside him.

"Why?" You suddenly asked looking up at him innocently.

"Why what?"

"Why for me...you do this? I dont understand I-"

"I thought I made myself clear about that, sweetheart." Negan slowly stepped closer to you not wanting to frighten you.

"I cant help when a woman catches my eye and I haven't had a woman catch my eye in a long fucking time."

Got cut off with this post, I'll post part 2 in a bit!

[ikarosapollo]

tagged by @zuukko ah thank you bethan!!

Rules: answer these 85 statements & tag 20 people

the last:

1. drink: soda

2. phone call: my mom

3. text message: my partners mom

4. song: what’s it gonna be - shura

5. time you cried: the night from thursday to friday last week? i think

have you ever:

6. dated someone twice: yea

7. kissed someone and regretted it: nope

8. been cheated on: not that i know of 

9. lost someone special: yeah

10. been depressed: i mean,,im pretty sure i am but ive never been diagnosed so

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: nope

favorite colors:

12. blue

13. purple

14. black

15: thats like,,it tbh asdghf

16:

i guess??

in the last year have you:

17. laughed until you cried: oh yeah for sure

18. found out someone was talking about you: yeaa

19. met someone who changed you: yep

20. found out who your friends are: i mean, kinda? idk

21. kissed someone on your facebook list: yeah

22. made friends: yep!! this past year ive made some really good friends and i love them all

23. fallen out of love: nope

general:

25. what did you do for your last birthday: uhh i have shit memory, i think i watdhed horror movies with my friends and played until dawn? im pretty sure that was last year..

26. how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them

27. do you have any pets: kinda, i mean its technically my partners cat but i love him

28. what time did you wake up: like,,6 am? i stayed in bed for a while tho

29. what were you doing at midnight last night: i think i might have fallen asleep already idk tho

30. name something you can’t wait for: going to london at the end of october for comic con!!! c:

31: what are you listening to right now: ring of keys from fun home

32: have you ever talked to a person named tom: no i dont think so

33: something that’s getting on your nerves: bethan wrote swedish and honestly?? mood??? actually speaking in general cause i always mess words up,, also like,,people,,,in general,,tbh

34. do you want to change your name: my birthname yeah cause i havent changed it yet

35. hair color: brown

36. long or short hair: short

37. piercings: i have an industrial and a few on my ear lobes, but that it,,for now

38. tattoos: i dont have any yet but i’m planning on getting at least one or two

39. blood type: i have no idea

40. nicknames: matt, matty, matti, tory called me atthole once and theresa called me matt thigh ass if those count asghjdf

41. relationship status: taken

42. zodiac: libra

43. pronouns: he/him

44. most visited website: tumblr, youtube is probably a close second

45. right or left handed: right

46. surgeries: a few, cause i was sick and also once i ha to reattach two of my toes when i was little lmao

47. sports: sports? idk her

48. favorite tv show: uh, criminal minds and elementary maybe? rn at least

49. vacations: i used to go to the mountains every spring but my grandparents sold their cabin so that’s not happening anymore, otherwise? ive been like,,no where

50. sneakers: i have like, one pair, and then a million pairs of converse

more general:

52. eating: i just had breakfast 

53. fave drink: orange juice i think

54. what you’re up to: looking over applications for the safeshironet and also im having anxiety about a meeting i have later

55. waiting for: top surgery,,going on t maybe,,also comic con!!

56. want: to be able to actually do something with my life at some point

57. get married: i’m not sure, maybe

58. career: ive always wanted to be an author but idk, id love to work with books tho so, librarian or working in a book store would be nice

which is better:

60. hugs or kisses: both

61. lips or eyes: eyes

62. shorter or taller: shorter

63. older or younger: neither tbh

64. nice arms or stomach: uhh arms? i guess

65. hook up or relationship: relationship

66. troublemaker or hesitant: like,,,what i like in a person or me? cause im hesitant af but idk man

have you ever:

67. kissed a stranger: no

68. drank hard liquor: yeaa

69. lost glasses/contacts: nope

70. turned someone down: yeah

71. sex on the first date: nope

72. broken someone’s heart: im pretty sure yea,,,

73. had your heart broken: ye when i was like 12 ajsdghf but also recently but not romantically

74. been arrested: nope

75. cried when someone died: yeah

76. fallen for a friend: yep yep

do you believe in:

77. yourself: moslty? nope

78. miracles: idk tbh, probably not

79. love at first sight: not really

80. santa claus: nope

81. kiss on the first date: i mean, yeah if thats what you wanna do?

82. angels: maybe? idk tbh

other:

83. current best friend’s name(s): elin, linnea, noah, theresa, lois also aleesha probably, idk those are the friends that are the most important to me rn, but i love all my friends :// they’re all the best :((

84. eye color: brown

85. favorite movie: the man from uncle

im tagging: @dianaofthemiscyra @transkeiths @ejharts @marshmallow-galaxy @macnkeith @connerkcnt @timotydrake @sharkiestshark @blackstarfires and @strawberrysombra 

this is really long and you guys dont have to do this if you dont want to <3

[chubbyjungkook]

Just a chance

It was a normal day in taehyung's life , he was sitting in the university cafeteria ,scrolling down his phone as he waits for his  childhood best friend to arrive  when he heard a familiar voice calling his name and someone hugging him 

" hey jungkoookie , i was waiting for you " he answer giggling as he ruffled the younger's hair , jungkook sit down next to him as he saw , jungkook's boyfriend , Seokjin sitting down too 

" hey taehyung-ssi how you doing ? " he ask as he place some food they had bought in the cafeteria  for the 3 of them 

"Did you enjoy winter break ? " the younger ask as he started eating some of his food 

" i'm doing fine , i spend the winter break with my family it was nice to see them after so long " he answer as he started drink some juice 

"We went to my parents house also my moms told me that you should come visit soon " he comments with a soft smiled 

They continue talking about their small break and about some thinks about of the new cicle until jungkook decided to ask the older the question that he had been wanting to ask 

" ummm hyung and what happened with minhyuk ? " he asked as he watch the older expression turn serious 

" You know he was an asshole as all the boys I met " he says normally he was used to it . Between them , taehyung at always being in the heavier side and he had been bullied for that in high school , jungkook always defended him , so he was used to people being mean at him

"Fuck " he heard jin sigh " i didnt though he would turn out to be an asshole too , im s- " he was cut back for the excited jungkook"s  voice 

"That's amazing ! " he say as he watch seokjin and taehyung stared at him as he was crazy " i mean  umm im angry that he was an asshole and i wanna hit him so bad but since you are single now , i want you to meet someone " 

" first of all he wasn't my boyfriend we just went to some dates and two , kookie i don't really feel like meeting someone right now " he mumbled softly as he stares as his plate before he glance at jungkook back 

“i know you didn't had good experiences with the guys you had know , hyung ….. but i swear he is a sweetheart please hyung , just give him a chance “ he says softly as he watching him with his cute doe eyes

“i mean taehyung-ah , you know i don't always encourage jungkook when he want to set up dates or things like that but i know jungkook’s friend and he seem like a nice person , you should give him a chance “ he mumbles softly 

“ahg fine , i just do it cause i want you too stopped trying to make me meet people “ it was normal that jungkook try to find him dates , he normally rejected all of his best friend possible option but for the first time Seokjin was also agree with jungkook “ who is it ? “ he ask as he finish his food and take some sips of his juice 

“Park jimin. You remember him right ? we used to hang out with him in middle school“ he watch the older frown softly before he nodded

“yeah i remember jiminnie , he moved abroad right ? “ he mumbled a bit sadly as he remember that jimin was his first crush back then but he never told him because he was shy, jungkook nodded as he take a bite on his sandwich 

“ Yes , he did but when we were in Busan he recognized me . He said he had come back and he is living here in Seoul now and he will start studying here and guess what ? “ he watch taehyung watch him expectantly “ he ask me about you , i show him some pics of you and fuck you should saw him he look completaly whipped , he ask me if maybe you wanted to go on a date  with him “

His cheeks blushed madly at the younger’s words “yah jungkook you might be exaggerating he might just wanted to talk again “ he tried to stay serious even though he wanted to smiled softly 

“i was there so i can tell he was really whipped , anyways if he just wanna talk to you again there might not be any problem “ jin comments calmly as he give one cookie a bite 

Jungkook grabs the older’s phone as he saves Jimin's number on it before handing it back “ there it is !  just message him hyung , no matter what i'm sure he would enjoy going out with you “ the younger smiled softly at him before the bells ring . Jungkook and Seokjin got up as they waved at him before heading to their classrooms , taehyung walk to his classroom as he was considering if he should message jimin 

After classes he was looking for jungkook and jin so they could go home when he saw them making out , he giggled softly as he decided to send a message to jungkook 

                                                                                                                To:♡jungkookie♡ 

 I'm going home , don't worry ;))                   

 i hope you "enjoy " your night                          

  kookie . 

To : taehyungie 🐯

OH FUCK YOU SAW US ?!

I'm sorry hyungie haha and

YES i will enjoy it :)) 

                                                                                                                                                                                    To: ♡jungkookie♡

 Ew, gross i don't wanna know

  that 

To : taehyungie 🐯

Mean :((

Oh yeah , don't forget to message 

Minnie , hyung ! 

See you tomorrow                  

                                                                                                                                                           To:♡jungkookie

Yeah . Don't worry , i will 

See you tomorrow , tell Jin 

hyung not to be too rough

on you i don't wanna hear you

whining all day 

To : taehyungie 🐯

OMG SHUT UP HYUNG 

read at 6.30 

He giggled softly as he headed to the bathroom to take a shower , he changed and laid down on his bed staring at the ceiling wondering if he should message Jimin . He grabs his phone as he sigh 

To : jiminnie-hyung 

 Umm …..jiminnie ? Hi its me 

 Taehyung , jungkookie gave me 

 your number ^^

To : tae- tae 

Oh , hi taehyungie ! Yeah 

Its me jimin :)) 

How are you doing ?      

To : jiminnie hyung 

I'm doing fine and you ?Kookie  

Told me you move back to  seoul

To: tae-tae

Yes i move to seoul 

i really miss korea 

umm well …. i guess jungkookie 

already told you but i wanted to

ask you out 

read at 7.45

Oh fuck , was jimin inviting him to date ?! he never thought his middle school crush ask him out , he could feel his hands trembling as he try to write a coherent answer 

 To: tae-tae

i mean you don't have to

accept if you don't want to 

, taehyungie 

                                   To : jiminnie-hyung

ow , no , really  i want too  

                                                                            To: tae-tae

oh , really ?? 

wanna go out and take lunch

 with me after classes ?

                                                                      To : jiminnie-hyung   

Yeah , its fine for me :)) 

To: tae-tae

okey , i’ll wait for you in the library 

See you tomorrow honey ;) 

 Fuck did jimin just call him honey ?!  he could feel his cheeks blushing at the older’s words as he write his reply 

                                                                                  To : jiminnie-hyung                                                                                                                

 See you tomorrow ,      

  hyung :D

  read at 8.01

He let his phone aside as he stared at the ceiling , he didn't think he had been so excited in his whole life , he tried to sleep but he was just too excited to do that . He was think about the “ date “ ( he wasn't sure to call it a date ) with jimin that he didn't realized he fell asleep 

-----------------------------

He wakes up when he hears his alarm as he turns it off , getting up to choose some clothes he tries to choose some clothes . He ends up wearing some jeans and a hoodie as he walks to the university .

As soon as he arrive he try to look for jungkook in his classroom watching him sitting in the back , he went and sit next to him 

"Someone seems excited ~" Jungkook hummed as he let his phone aside smiling at the older " you message jimin , right ?  Tell me what happened " he mumbled in a excited tone 

"He ask me out and he are gonna have lunch today after classes " he answer with a smile 

Jungkook smile warmly , happy about how happy the older look " you have to tell me about it " he giggled as the teacher enter the classroom 

As the hours pass taehyung was getting more nervous and excited by the end of his classes he walk with jungkook and jin to the library 

"Hyung , calm down i can watch you trembling " he says as he giggle 

" shut up im nervous " he says biting his nails anxiously as they got closer to the library 

" i know but just calm down , everything is gonna be alright " he says in a calm tone as he stop the older from biting his nails 

" well i guess we have go now , good luck with your date taehyung-ah ! " he smile at the younger 

" good luck hyungie , tell me everything after ! " he says as they both leave 

He waits for jimin outside the library , he waits for some minutes and jimin hasn't arrived yet . Did he plant him ? No jimin wasn't like that …… or that what was he hope 

Some he hear some loud footsteps and someone touch his arm 

" taehyungie ? Oh my god i'm sorry for keeping you waiting " he says as he tries to catch his break , since he obviously had runs to there but his voice sound guilty

"Don't worry jiminnie , i didn't wait that long " he answer smiling as calming as he could as they started to head to a restaurant nearby 

" you change a bit since the last time i saw you " jimin mumbled , taehyung's smile drops a bit , he knew the older was referring to his weight and he had expected a comment about it 

" yeah i know i used to be kinda chubby at middle school , now im properly chub- " before he could finish his sentence , he was cut back by the older

" you are even cuter now ~ and you look more mature now , you are really handsome taehyung - ah " he says smiling fondling at him 

He wasn't expecting the older's words and he couldn't hide his noticeable blush in his chubby cheeks 

"Ow i-i thank you .. you are even more handsome than the last time i saw you , i mean you were handsome back there too " he wished he could flirt as good as jimin did , but he saw a small smile in the older's face 

"Aish you are cute " he mumbled as they enter to the restaurant 

The restaurant look nice and cozy , taehyung couldn't believe he had never came there before 

"This place is so nice , jimin ~ " he mumbled softly as they sit down on a table at the back of it 

" i had came here sometimes , i thought you might like it " he smiled softly 

They talk about their lives in this year until the waiter arrives asking them if they were ready to order jimin order kinda fast since he had come there before but taehyung was struggling to choose 

"Want me to help you choose something ? " jimin mumbles softly as he feels him squeezing his hand under the table 

He nodded at him and jimin choose something for him from the menú 

"W-what did you chose ? " he ask curious about what the older order for him 

" i remember you really like spaghetti back in middle school so i order you some ,thats ok for you ? " he ask the last part in a worried tone 

" yeah , i still like pasta so much" he giggles softly 

There was a small silence , it was comfortable for both of them , until jimin had the encourage to break itn

" well the reason why i wanted to ask you out was because i wanted to tell you something …. " the confidence in the older's voice was gone now which made taehyung a bit nervous 

" you need to tell me something ? Oh then go ahead , i'm listening " he smiled softly at him trying to hide his nervousness 

" Okay look , I have liked you for a while now , I could tell you before I move out but I really need to tell you this , Jungkook told me a bit of your bad relationships experiences but c-can you give me a chance taehyung ? If you don't want to then that's ok , we can still be friends right ? "  he feel the older calm down after he finish talking watching him expectantly for an answer 

" wow , are you dumb ? I like you since middle school and i was so obvious that i just thought you didn't like me back " he answer giggling softly making jimin laugh too " and yes i wanna give you a chance " he smiled softly at him 

" fuck thank you so much taehyungie ! " he days with a big smile they talk for a bit before the food arrives 

The waiters place a salad for the older and a huge plate of spaghetti for him , it was bigger than his normal portion of food as he gulp down before he takes a bite of his food , his eyes widened at the amazing taste of it , he hear jimin laughing softly as he give him a glance 

" it tastes good doest it ? Looks like you like it " he says softly as he eat some of his food   

“it tastes so good !” They talk about university and Taehyung talks about his life in seoul until now . They were having a really good time. Taehyung didn't realize he had finished the huge plate of pasta , his cheeks blushed madly as he gave his tummy a glance just realizing how full he felt . The waistband of his jeans were digging painfully into his bloated tummy as he tries to rub his tummy through the pocket of his hoodie try to hold back the urge of burping 

He watch the older’s plate realizing he still had half of his salad there making him blushed at how fast he had finish his food , the older look at him and then at his plate smiling softly at him 

“wanna order some dessert ? there some tasty cakes here , jungkook told me you really like sweet thing “ he giggled softly as he saw taehyung blushed a bit 

“I'm kinda full , hyung … i don't think i can finish it ” he mumbled softly as he rub his tummy softly 

“oh come on you should taste some dessert , if you can finish it then you can take it home , there no problem “ he answer smiling softly at him 

Even to he feel really full , the cake sound tempting , he was really full but he sure can fit some cake there 

“umm okay , some cake sounds good “ he smiled softly at him as he try to choose between all of the good-looking cakes  

“you should choose this one “ the older point at a chocolate cake that look really taste at the pic in the menú “ i think you might like it “ 

he nodded softly “ then i wanna order that one “ he smiled as the older order the cake for him  

After some minutes of waiting , a waiter place a whole cake making taehyung’s eyes widen 

“hyung i think this is a bit too much for me … would you like some ? “ he mumbled as he stared at the tasty chocolate cake 

“i don't like sweet things that much , you don't have to finish it all . Just treat yourself ,cutie “ he giggled softly as he saw taehyung cheeks blush madly 

Taehyung started to dig into the cake , it was the best cake he had ever eaten . They continue talking when his tummy started to hurt a bit , he look down at his plate realizing he had eaten only the half of the cake 

He pressed his fingers against his bloated tummy , feeling how hard it was . He unbuttoned his jeans as discreet as I could , he was glad that he decided to wear a hoodie so it wouldn't be so obvious but what taehyung didn’t know was that jimin was watching him with a small smirk 

“oh , you are almost done with your cake , taehyungie ?   “ he ask the younger with a small smile as he take a sip of his drink 

“ u-uh yeah ….. im really full to be honest , i don't know if i might finish it “ he mumbled as rubs his stuffed tummy 

“ ow i know you can do it taehyungie , you can finish it and be a good boy for hyung , right ?~" he mumbled softly making taehyung shiver softly 

good boy ? he like how that sound coming from jimin’s mouth 

he nodded softly as his cheeks blushed when the older smiled warmly at him . He started to shove some bites of the cake eagerly into his mouth , soon in the place was only left a small part of the cake 

“want me to help you , baby ? “ Taehyung blushed madly as he nodded softly , Jimin got closer to Taehyung grabbing a spoon of cake and feeding him . After some bites he finally finish the cake and he feel like was gonna pop  

Jimin smiled softly at him , giving his tummy some pats before he called the waiter and paid for their meal .

“are you ready to leave ? “ he ask softly as he saw taehyung rubbing his tummy softly , he place one of his hands on the younger’s tummy looking at him for permission when taehyung nodded he started to rubs his tummy 

“ y-yes we can lea-” he was cut back by a blech when the older rubbed circles in the hardest part of taehyung’s tummy concentrating the pressure there , he covered his mouth as his cheeks blushed madly “oh my god , excuse me i'm really full “ 

“don't worry taehyung , it's ok “ he smiled warmly at him as he helped the younger getting up from his site making taehyung whined at how heavy his tummy was . He take taehyung back to his flat , promising that he will take him out to eat more often 

maybe he could get use to it  

---------------------------------------

After some months dating Taehyung was more happy and heavier , Jimin always made sure he was well-feed . He would buy him his favorite food and a lot of desserts everytime they would go out 

Jimin ask him to move in with him when they had been dating for 6 months , taehyung excitedly accepted and living with jimin just helped his weight gain , he used to have all the kitchen stoked with greasy food and a lot of sweets , taehyung was a bit shy at the begging to grab anything from there but jimin say he could eat us much as he wanted and it soon became a routine . 

“tae-tae im home ~ “ jimin shouted as he head to their living room finding taehyung lying there around a lot of wrappers and the younger eating a tub of ice cream as he watch some drama in the tv 

“uhm , hi hyungie “ he mumbled softly as he smiled softly at him before he shove some more ice cream into his mouth 

“looks like someone already had dinner  ~ “ he teased the younger as he watched taehyung cheeks blushed madly 

“ i was craving something sweet , i couldn't help it “ he giggled softly as he let out a loud belch “ can you feed me the rest of the ice cream please ? “ he mumbled softly as jimin sit beside him 

“fuck you are so gassy now ~ “ he giggled softly as he grabbed the icecream tub “ mhm you are so lazy to finish it by your own , mhm ? “ he shove a spoonful of ice cream into taehyung’s mouth

he whined softly before he shawlow the ice cream “don't tease me ~  just continue feeding me the ice cream “ he mumbled softly 

he continue feeding the rest of the ice cream to the younger until he finish it all as taehyung was whining while jimin rubbed the younger’s , digging his fingers into the hard swell in taehyung’s tummy making him belch loudly 

“fuck continue rubbing it , please~  “ he whined softly as the older giggled softly 

" uhm you like it when i do it ,right ?~ " he mumbled softly as he continue rubbing the younger's tummy 

He moaned softly when the older pinching some of the soft fat in his underbelly making his cheeks heat up 

After the pressure in his tummy was ease , jimin got up and clean all the wrappers in the coffee table before sitting next to taehyung again 

" do you wanna see something else on the tv ? Maybe a movie ? " he ask as he place his small on taehyung's plush waist rubbing his thumb back and forth 

He nodded softly " yeah a movie , sounds good " he mumbled , snuggling closer to the older

They watched the film cuddling each other until taehyung decided to talk 

"Hyungie ? " he heard jimin hummed quietly "Would you be okay if i wanted to gain more weight ? "  he mumbled in a nervous tone as he bite his bottom lip softly 

Jimin paused the movie before turning to taehyung. " tae-tae its it obvious that I'm more than ok with it ? It's your body after all plus you will look so cute if you got even chubbier ~ " he giggled softly before pecking the younger's lips  

His eyes widen in surprise before he hugs the older tightly " how about we make a goal ? How about 250 ? " he mumbled as his cheeks blushed lightly 

He nodded softly " mhm if you wanna reach that goal , then you should start eating more ~ " he smirked softly at taehyung 

"You should feed me more then ~ " he teased the older with a small grin 

"Mhm i gladly will , honey " jimin answer before he pull the younger closer for a kiss 

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

warnings: extremely negative feelings towards a sibling, distressing / intrusive thoughts. placed under a break due to the content of the message. remember, I'm not a mental health professional.

updated with additional viewpoints from readers at the bottom!

I'm sorry in advance.

I really hate my older sister. She never respects my boundaries, insults me frequently, and is just annoying and hypocritical in general.

I've always had these issues with her, but she lived at her own apartment away from me and the rest of my family, so I've been able to control my hatred of her. But last year in March she moved back in and sold her apartment. She has no plans of leaving anytime soon, and I can't stand her.

We shared a bedroom for about a year because we were also taking care of my cousin who also moved in with us last year. My cousin has since moved out, but my sister is unfortunately here to stay for a couple of years. But with extra space, I was able to move into the spare bedroom and thought that would be the end of my problems.

It wasn't. In fact, she has become even more unbearable. The hardest part of this relationship is that she has a weird obsession with being with me. I'm not sure if this is because she loves me, or she's just weird. I think she's weird because my parents never act like she does.

Our bedrooms are right next to each other. There's really no reason for her to miss me. But every single fucking minute she's coming into my room to bother me. I would have more empathy for her if she acknowledged my limits, but she doesn't.

She's constantly cuddling me after I've said for MONTHS that I don't enjoy it and it makes me uncomfortable. She constantly belittles me by saying I couldn't live without her, and that I would be a mess if it wasn't for her (mind you, I've lived without her at the house for YEARS and I was perfectly fine). She's constantly in my business, interrogating me about every little thing. She once locked the door and wouldn't let me leave the room without answering her questions for 20 minutes; she asked me about a $30 Amazon order containing manga I ordered with MY OWN MONEY. And I had permission for my parents to order it! It wasn't her business whatsoever.

I've tried to keep her out numerous times; I've gotten in trouble for it. My parents say I'm being mean and that this is her way of loving me. What I feel like they ignore is that I'M UNCOMFORTABLE. Her way of "loving me" HURTS.

I've tried communication. I've had multiple meetings with my family about my boundaries and they say they'll change, but they never do.

Another factor that worsens this is that I have borderline personality disorder. I'm currently being denied therapy or intervention of any kind. I get told my mental illness is a result of me having an attitude and hating my family.

I writing this to you because I've been having very alarming thoughts recently. I'm been somewhat suicidal as long as I can remember, but this is different. I've been having nightmares about killing my family/my family killing me. I don't want to kill my family. As much as they have abused me, I know they truly love me deep down. But when I'm in a mental breakdown, I don't think for the most part. I'm afraid I'm going to do something to hurt them if they continue to push me. I'm too scared to turn myself into the police and I don't want to be taken away from my home. I truly need therapy, but it's expensive and I'm not allowed to get it.

Are there any options left for me? I love my family and I want to get better, but I can't stand them. It'll be a while before I can live on my own, and I don't think I'll make it that long.

I'm so sorry.

I appreciate that you came to me, however, please remember I am not a mental health professional.

I do not have the best relationship with my family. I've come to accept that they just exist and I moved away from them. I keep a strict level of familiarity with them for my own sanity and well-being. There are people in my immediate family I don't talk to anymore or only speak to in certain situations, with other people around to buffer my emotions. No one in my family understands or respects my mental health issues and I have ceased talking about it with them.

I will admit, I had to ask for help. I'm going to share the answer of someone I trust, because they are much more level-headed when it comes to something like this.

Use different words with your sister. Instead of "I'm mad or annoyed", use words that bring out more empathy - "You're making me sad and uncomfortable. You're hurting me." Anger is usually perceived as something within you, something you must control. But sadness is usually not perceived in the same light. People usually see sadness as something that has a cause and perhaps letting her know that she is the cause will have an effect on her. Using different words when speaking to her may slowly change her perspective.

When it comes to your parents, well, parents do not usually understand sibling dynamics. They're fucking useless most of the time when it comes to problems specifically between siblings. It might be better if you say something like, "Her constant intrusions are affecting my school work. My grades are going to drop." Usually, parents respond more urgently if you say you education is affected - and it doesn't matter if it's true or not, we're just trying to get them to help in some way.

I had to remind them it's summertime lol

Oh shit, you're right. Er. Well, In any case, it seems you've tried having reasonable discussions with your parents and it doesn't seem helpful to continue discussing this particular topic with them. Maybe get into fitness since it's summertime. Go outside, do something active. She can't cuddle you if you're running, right? Then you can also be stronger and feeling better physically improves mental health. Put some music on, go hiking or running, take yourself out of the situation.

I don't know if this is possible, but perhaps if you're experiencing a mental breakdown and you're afraid of hurting your family, run out of the house? It might be better to be physically away from them at that time to avoid saying or doing anything you regret. It may help clear your head and help your family realize that this is something that is truly debilitating to you.

I don't know your age, so I don't know if the school thing is relevant. It's only a suggestion.

You said it will be a while before you can live on your own. When I knew the cons of living with my family outweighed the pros, I did everything in my power to prepare myself for leaving because I needed a goal in order to survive. I needed distractions, reading, writing, gaming, music, anything else to occupy my mind and help control my thoughts. There was a time when I needed music to fall asleep (headphones in on low volume).

Also... uh.

I'm not saying you should do this. I'm only saying I did.

My siblings and I have physically fought before. One has scars from fighting me. The scarred one is the one closest to me currently.

Not saying you should do it.

But I did.

If anyone feels comfortable enough to share how they dealt with it in their own situation, please do. Maybe more perspectives can help this person.

--

some other experiences sent to me:

anon #1

I don't think I had a situation that extreme but my brother was a little like that. I honestly had to become kinda rude and indifferent. Like he'd always use my laptop and stuff and I put passwords on everything and just don't tell him. And then when he tried to hug or cuddle id say I don't liek it and just push him away physically now this soudns fucking obvious when I say it this way but like I don't think I read that u tried it ? Idk I discovered I have a loud annoying scream that neighbours will hear, and fucking strokg legs I used to kick him away but like I was tiny so I don't really endorse violence but I didnt like being close to a 'boy' essentially at taht age so yea... Idk man siblings are weird and I have had intrusive thoughts so I think I didn't handle it well but for a few years I became an asshole to him and then now I'm good with talking sometimes and I keep it short and sweet and I've mentioned that I'm sorry for being mean in the past bcuz like I am ? Bcuz I'm not an asshole ? ( But like I did what I had to do ) I hope u get the help and support u need

anon #2

I read the message from the previous anon and I have to say I relate to what they say. I wouldn’t say i’ve completely dealt with the situation when it comes to my parents.

I have 4 siblings and i’m the oldest, my sister that’s 2 years younger than me always gets in my way and is a tyrant. Because she’s much taller than me she overpowers me and i also have scars from when we’ve fought. My parents don’t intervene because they say we’ll make up soon and I honestly can’t stay mad at people for long. I also live with my parents and am not able to move out anytime soon until I get my degree.

A few weeks ago my mother was complaining to my father that I don’t help around the house and all that bullshit but it’s obviously not true. Anyway. My father came into my room and threw all my clothes from my cupboards on the floor and said my sister and I must get out of his house. He was literally pulling us and we were crying because where the hell would we go. My smaller siblings were begging for him not to chase us out of the house but he was ballistic. He was constantly throwing insults at me, calling me selfish and disrespectful. I was having a mental breakdown and I said i hope that God takes my life away because i’m too weak to do it myself. I kept saying that and when my parents heard me. They called me crazy and were laughing at me and said i should take it back because instead of me another one of my family members would go.

My parents don’t care about mental health and therapy. It’s all unnecessary to them. But after that night I tried to find my own way of getting rid of the negative thoughts, I choose to ignore what everyone tells me. I agree with everything that you said about trying to get away from their family when they have those thoughts. I try meditation and praying. I���m not sure if that person follows any religion but that’s what helped me. And writing can be cathartic. Also remember that you’re not alone, there are so many people out there who share your sorrows and can relate to your situation. I think about my little siblings who i’m close to and what it would be like if i wasn’t there.

Maybe if they could get a pet? I know having a pet can make you feel less alone and you feel a sense of responsibility towards them. As for their sister, she needs to see their point of view and tell her that she makes her feel overwhelmed with the things she does. She can spend time with her and try to make her understand that they need their space too.

anon #3

I also have sum advice 4 the sibling anon frm a fellow bpd buddy:

Does ur view of ur sister change from "i hate her" to "she's alright" sometimes? Viewing sum1 as all bad or all good is common in bpd ppl and usually changes alot. I rec writing down the moments where she shows she loves u. This could be thru buying smth for u or doing smth 4 u. I had a similar relationship w a friend and this exercise helped me remember that she might not have intentions to hurt me and might b trying 2 bond. Repairing the relationship might take a while. Talk alot if u can, it seems like ur family is at least willing to hear u out, even if there behavior doesn't change much. Keep sum distance if needed. Working out and finding fun hobbies is good.

If u feel like ur breaking down, try breathing exercises n identify 5 things u notice thru ur senses. What do u feel? What do u smell? What do u taste? What do u see? What do u hear? I personally like taking myself down rabbit holes. For example: I see a yellow jacket > this shade of yellow is a cool tone > what makes a color "cool" or "warm" > why do we associate red with warmth > what if the sun was blue > what if ocean water looked orange > is water wet

I usually end up forgetting what was making me upset. If it was a big deal I would still remember, but at least I would b less emotional and a bit more rational.

Search up cognitive behavior therapy and dialectical behavior therapy and try 2 practice sumthing similar 2 exercises u would perform w a therapist. Squeeze stress balls. Masturbate (this blog is perfect 4 that lol). Maybe watch some videos done by therapists on youtube. I watched a couple of videos abt therapists reacting 2 fighting in movies and I learned alot (this video was very fun to watch)!

Anyway that's what helps me! Good luck 2 u!!!

[chappedandfadedvds]

Nov 1st, Sunday 09:11

Rain pounding against the window. A slow steady rythm. And a hazy greyish tint lay over the serene room of the awoken boy in bed, buried under thick covers. He blinked his heavy eyes open, not yet having caught enough sleep to feel the energy to do anything more than that.

It took him a moment to recall the date, sunday. Given it was still pretty dark inside his room, he guessed it to be fairly early. Or maybe the clouds outside his window just didnt allow for more light. And he would be lying if he didn’t appreciate hiding in a halfshadow, as he looked into the calm sleeping face of Lucas. 

Jens didn’t remember them falling asleep that close to each other, after they all had basically stumbled tired and worn out into bed last night. Time and curfew forgotten and all of them deciding on a spontaneous sleep over. He barely had been able to catch a glimpse of Lucas pulling off his socks and jeans, before crawling into bed, while Jens got his sister her beloved pillow to cuddle.

There was some rustling coming from the foot of the bed, on the floor, on three matresses from Lotte and their mom, Milan, Sander and Robbe had made themselves comfortable. He listened carefully in order to pick out if someone else was awake like him, but figured that they in fact were still fast asleep, leaving Jens to appreciate that this moment was his only.

It came daringly close to how he felt waking up next to Jana, without the low guilt of cheating on Britt, that had broken them up in the end. Instead there was a different feeling of sadness settling in his heart. It wasn’t really sadness though, it was something else, but then it wasn’t and Jens couldn’t find a word to settle on to describe it.

He watched the face of Lucas. He shouldn’t find a boy’s face as attractive as he did. Not that he couldn’t appreciate a beautiful man, but it didn’t came with a desire to touch or kiss said man. Jens really tried hard to think back to an instance in his life, where he might have pushed these thoughts away in favor for falling for girls only. Some sort of internalised fear of feelings for people of his own sex. But there weren’t any and it drove him crazy. It meant it shouldn’t be any different to waking up to all his other male friends. And yet...

Jens closed his eyes and  imagined all the mornings he woke up next to Robbe, they were the closest friends for years, constantly touching and hugging, did he ever felt attracted to him in that way? He thought his friend looked good, yes. And that he felt some love for him, yes. Would he want to kiss Robbe? Probably not. Would he have kissed Robbe back if his friend would have tried to? Maybe, but than no, no he didn’t think so? It was confusing to reconstruct old memories.

As Jens pulled himself out of his thoughts with a pained expression on his face, he found the worried blue eyes of Lucas watching him thoughtfully, biting his bottom lip as he so often did in contemplation.

„Nightmare?“ Came the faint whisper and than an attentive hand from under the blanket to brush away a strand of hair on his forhead.

Jens fortunetely remembered that breathing was a crucial part of living and tried to do just that, before shaking his head slightly. 

„Good.“ Lucas mouthed with a vague smile on his lips not yet convinced, his hand sinking onto the pillow between their faces, next to Jens’s. So why the fuck wouldn’t he move his fingers slightly over. If Lucas would have been a girl, he wouldn’t have thought twice about it. He probably would have taken him out on wendsday already. The first step is the hardest. Jens’s mind provided this stupid universally applicable line, that sounded cheesy and overused and nonethelss true.

He was a coward he knew that, but even stretching his hand out, so that their plams flat on the soft fabric below would cause their little fingers to touch, seemed like a huge accomplishment right now. They weren’t even close to hold hands. This as well may just have been a sheer accident.

Lucas’s open blue eyes darted surprised towards their touching fingers and back up at Jens searching for his gaze, with a question between them, both didn’t dare to ask. Not even in the comfort of an early quiet morning. Rather Lucas lifted his little finger to intertwine them, swallowing nervously, as he did so with caution. He was scared, Jens knew, because he was just as much afraid of crossing a line. The beating of his heart, and the blood rushing through his body swallowed up any sound of the rain, he had heard so clearly a minute ago.

There was just them, and them almost holding hands.

Jens curved his finger around Lucas’s, putting some pressure in it, just to reassure the boy that he wants this too. And it seemed to work, as the tension in their bodies diminished, leaving them to study each other faces in a comfortable silence. 

There didn’t need to be words to understand each other in this second. Jens knew that it would leave him restless once they would leave this moment behind them. He knew he would have to seriously start question his sexuality, and everything that would probably happen from here on out. But for now he could push the panic in the back of his mind off to deal with later.

Good luck to future him.

„Ow. Fuck“ Jens cursed under his breath wincing, not wishing to wake anybody else, but it did catapult both of them back into the reality of this room they shared with four other people, oblivious to this promising discovery between them.

Lucas’s gleeful snort let Jens send him a pissed off look, before he turned his head as far behind him as he could without letting go of the merest gentle touch between them. He saw his sister with his phone in his hand watching him innocently. As if she hadn’t dug her tiny sharp knee into his back just now.

„You are awake. Can we have breakfast?“ Lotte quietly asked, blinking up at him, knowing she already had won this. Apparently she also was convinced she had woken him up and that was just fine with Jens. He didn’t need his sister to belabour him with questions. Especially if he didn’t really know the answers to them himself.

„How late is it?“ He whispered and was promptly presented with his bright lit up phone screen.

9:43

He guessed it was actually an approbiate time to have breakfast and nodded.

„Alright, let’s go.“ The words barely left his lips, when his sister was sitting up and out of his bed, tip toeing around his room to get out, without stepping and waking the three boys on the floor.

Jens looked back at Lucas who smiled and whispered delighted: „I’m actually getting quite hungry myself, so I think Lotte has great timing. And after the pumpkin soup from last night, I can only imagine what feast we are gonna have today.“

„You are an idiot, you know that.“

„Yes.“ Lucas affirmed happily smiling away. This was unfair. Now Jens felt the explicit need to actually dish out a great breakfast and impress this dumb dutch boy.

„Fine.“ Jens agreed, feeling weird breaking off the shared bare minimum of human contact, as he withdrew his hand in favor of getting up. As did Lucas behind him, stretching and about to collect his things from the floor. When he was hit by a pair of grey sweats, that Jens had thrown in his general direction, putting a pair on himself. He shrugged at Lucas, trying for a nonchalant look, while moving over to his room door, that stood slightly open from Lotte’s escape.

On the floor was Milan rolled up into a ball of a body and a blanket, only his head sticking out. And right beside him Robbe tangled around Sander, who didn’t seemed to mind loosing all his senses in his body apparently. Or maybe he was just different, because Jens could very well recall all the times his arms and legs had fallen asleep under the weight of a girl half on top of him. 

Jens smiled at them regardless, maybe one day he could have that too again. He kinda missed it.

„You coming?“ He heard Lucas whisper at him from the doorway, looking very pretty with his untidy bed hair and in Jens’s sweats. He seemed to be just as happy watching the couple to Jens’s feet as he waited for Jens to follow him down to the kitchen. 

The were almost there when Jens felt Lucas taking his hand, squeezing it before letting go again, to help Lotte, who was about to climb on the counter to get some tea cups out.

„Wait, wait! I can do that. I get the plates and stuff and you can set the table instead, okay?“

Jens stood there for the moment it took him to work through his storm of emotions again. Why did he feel just so much these days, be it good or bad? This wasn’t normal. But he seemed to feel every emotion just double as much as usual. Everything triggered a whirlwind of thoughts and it scared him. What if this would never stop?

He swallowed it down, settling for a smile instead and went over to join them.

„Say, can Mister Chef here also do some american pancakes for his dutch starving guest?“

„You bet.“ He smirked at the challenging amused look Lucas threw him over the shoulder. Playfully smacking the boy’s head, Jens shoved him away from the oven, in order to prepare the best breakfast the six had in their lives. 

Well at least as great as their fridge and pantry allowed for.

[yuvon-writes-letters]

To, Yu

Okay, I was gone, and the moment I came back, i [The sentence randomly stops]

I’m, not upset at the fact you lied, i actually had an inkling for awhile now while you were describing the rooms for the first time, it looked like you wanted to continue, but stopped yourself at the last second. I understand why you lied, seeing all of those things must’ve been hard, but Lis and I can’t help you if we don’t know anything, ok Yu?

It sounds like, you found ways out, but both are, not good for you? I don’t know, my brain’s all fuzzy and I can’t comprehend words right, maybe I’m getting something wrong.

My point is, when you build up the guts to, please please please explain to us, or at least me, on what’s in that North room, I don’t care if it’s bad we need to know everything we can about the realm so [The sentence stops again]

Sorry, I’m just, kind of on the edge. Of course you don’t have to tell me now, but

If, it’s not intruding on personal space, what the hell happened between you and Jake? I’m assuming that Jake lied about something, but I don’t think we would do any good if there’s bad blood between the two of you. I sent my Jake the letters too, and he agrees as well.

We’re both worried about you, so, don’t hide anything, alright? [The rest of the text is blacked out]

Rai and Jake

|Hello, real person behind Rai here, I wanted to clarify some things because I don’t think I made it clear before (I’m sorry about that). Rai is a complete OC, their not a self-insert at all, and they have their own life completely separate from mine. Although it is true that I’ll be busy on July and won’t write letters frequently, I wanted to give an in-character Roleplay reason as to why Rai is not as active as the first few letters, hence the panicking at the last letter.

I, the real person, am completely alright, Rai, is not, not at all :)|

Rai,

Thanks for understanding. I'll try to hide as little as I can from now on.

What I think are the two ways out are sitting still and looking pretty, which I despise the concept of, and killing the MWAF by paying an even price, which I hate the idea of even more. (Blacked out) I checked out the altar room a little more, and the phrase "An eye for an eye" (or something approximate because Google Translate) was on the back of the altar in Greek. Jake helped me translate it before we argued.

Mixing mythologies yet again. So far we've got Egyptian, Greek, and... Biblical? I think that's from the Bible. Sue me, it's been a while since I took World Religions.

Actually... no. I guess it hasn't. It just feels longer than it actually was.

I'll try to be a little more specific about what's in the north room. It's not... quite as bad as I made it out to be before, but I was already freaking out and in a bad headspace from remembering the freaky stuff, and I blew it a little out of proportion. I'm not sure how I'd even explain what it really is, though.

It's something similar to a hologram, transparent enough that you can see the trees through it. There's some text in white that doesn't seem to be addressed to me, implying that I'm stuck between the end of something and the beginning of another. Then there are a couple bars— five, to be exact —and two of them are filling with orange very slowly. The others are untouched so far. It's implied I'll be out of this place when all the bars fill up to full. I'm not sure this text was necessarily written by the entity, though. If it was, I think it'd address me a little more directly.

I don't think the argument Jake and I had is necessarily all that useful to the investigation, but since I'm trying to not keep secrets anymore, I'll say it regardless. The cause is tangentially related to the case, anyhow.

I asked him a little while ago whether he could find out if there was a missing person's out for me or not, so we could figure out the extent of the stasis. Then drama happened and I completely forgot all about it until two days ago. I asked him again then, and he sort of acted a little cagey while telling me that he was still in the process of investigating, and told me to wait another day. So I did. I don't think he expected me to remember, since I forget things all the time, but I don't forget things I'm really invested in and I REALLY wanted to know the answer to that question.

Jake made an excuse and went offline when I tried to ask again, which sort of made me think the worst. In hindsight, thinking that anyone who could've reported me missing was dead was pretty stupid, but you try being rational in the face of an unknown like that. In any case, I got anxious, and that sort of blew everything out of proportion, and then that made me more and more upset, and given all the other bullshit inherent in this place and the stress I've been through lately I just completely broke down. Had to sit down and put my head down so I was less likely to pass out from my hyperventilating. Luckily, I knew what was going on and I know breathing exercises, so it wasn't as bad as it could have been.

In any case, when I was back to being semi-functional, I unlocked my phone again, meaning to close out of the chat, but apparently my last few texts before I had to stop had managed to get across to Jake at least a portion of how freaked out I was. He probably figured it out based on all the typoes and the lack of punctuation or something, his "flaw" (if you can call it that) only seems to make him oblivious to tone and not to outright out of character writing styles.

So he finally told me that there wasn't a missing person's out for me, and not only that but everyone who might have put one out pretty much forgot I existed. He got my fucking parents to answer a "survey," and they only filled out that my half-sister existed, not me. Legal documents and stuff were still all in order, but literally the only people who seem to remember I fucking exist are the Duskwood crew and you and Lis and he had the nerve to tell me that he didnt want to tell me because it wasnt essential information and it would affect my judgement

Back now. I screamed abuse into the woods for a couple minutes, so I feel a bit better now.

I can see his point, logically, but for fuck's sake, there are some things that don't have much to do with the case that I do need to know regardless. This is one.

I'm not going to cut contact with him forever. To put it callously, neither of us can afford that. But if I talk to him now, I'm going to end up saying something or other I'll regret.

Right. Other topics.

Rai, are you doing alright? I know you've got personal issues going on, and I'm not trying to pry into them, but your writing is sort of disjointed and you mentioned being "fuzzy" and "not comprehending words right". Are you getting enough to drink and to sleep? I know weird shit happens to me when I get dehydrated. If you ever feel like you're about to pass out, sit down and put your head between your knees. If this continues, maybe you should see a doctor. Do you feel like your head is stuffed with cotton balls, at all? Any other symptoms?

Feel better :(

—Yu

(The letter tucks itself into the paper clip with the others.)

[talpup]

Ok so working theory so far (i haven't re-read everything yet,but i don't know when i'll get the chance to so here's what i have): we know the dragon king and griffon queen wanted to end the war/guarantee future peace/power so they wanted to imprint their young to secure that. The griffon king disagreed and hid Teris- but he couldn't hide a missing royal baby forever, so the dragon king/his servants tracked down teris' last known location; which was with shouta's sphinx family. The dragons attacked bc they were initially trying to get teris back-but when they couldn't find her, dragons and griffons ordered all sphinxes to be killed,not bc they didnt choose a side, but because by hiding teris they betrayed BOTH sides since she was a tool for them to unite dragons with griffons (and guarantee the survival of both royal families, with their power as rulers). This led to different factions being created in the war- some loyal to the griffon king only, some to the griffon queen and dragon king, some to the dragon king only. But eventually everyone turned on each other and the dragons and griffons were exterminated. (Orrrrr shit started getting out of whack with the elementals, so the council members banded together to secretly kill the royal familymembers on both sides, so they got the dragons and griffons to revenge murder each other).

The council is hiding knowledge of the war because if people found out that they turned on the kings and queens they swore allegiance to, then they are no longer trusted/respected authority figures, and EVERYTHING they do/say will come into question... including the festivals to appease the elementals.So if fourths lost their faith/respect towards the council, they wouldnt appease the elementals, and the elementals would start fucking oblvi up again. Also fourths might see that as valid reason to start a coup against the council.

Also i know all for one has something to do with this and i am missing analysis on a lot of stuff but its late so im going to sleep zzzz

Ooo... Theories! I love theories!!!

Brief reminder. In chapter 13, Teris' remembered dream shows her father saying it was time to leave, after she and Shouta spent the day playing together, and Teris asking her father if they could stay a bit longer. Her father said he was afraid not, and when she asked if she would get to see and play with Shouta again, the Griffon King's answer was "I hope so, my dear. For all our sakes, I hope so.”

Also in the latest chapter, His Purple Highness' thoughts shared what they asked the Sphinx leader for and the agreement Teris' father and Shouta's grandfather came to: "Finding the Griffon Queen and Dragon King’s plans as abhorrent as they did, Shouta's grandfather had asked for little in exchange for preforming a block on Teris to prevent a forced imprint. The only thing the Sphinx leader had wanted was King Lheas’ word that the Griffon’s would stop killing his kind for not choosing a side and joining in the war, and a private audience with Teris."

So we know that the Griffon King didn't ask the Sphinx's to hide Teris. But your current thought is that the King didn't take Teris back home after visiting the Sphinx's but hid her somewhere, and the Dragon's came looking for her, tracking her to the Sphinx's and killing Shouta's pack? Interesting... I like it.

But here's a few hinting/leading questions to help further your theories:

If the Griffon King had gone to the Sphinx's to put a block on Teris to stop any forced imprinting, why wouldn't he just return home to his mate and Queen, secure in the knowledge that a such a terrible thing could no longer be done to his daughter?

Presumably, so long as the Griffon Queen and Dragon King didn't find out what the Griffon King had done (in having Shouta's grandfather put a block on Teris) they would have merely thought the attempt to force an imprint on Teris and Kai had failed. It's not like they would've had a lot to go on to be sure such a thing would've worked in the first place, seeing as it's such a long held illegal thing to do and there's little to no remaining ancient records of it being done.

Also, if the Griffon Queen and Dragon King's plan to force an imprint was such an abhorrent thing that the Griffon Queen's loyal and loving mate/King consort was willing to work against her for the first time ever, it stands to reason that others (whether Griffon, Dragon, or merely severing them) would turn against them for it as well. Others like say the Dragon Court for instance.?. I'm not saying Ptick was right about the Dragon Court rising up and killing the Dragon's and only wrong about why (Ptick saying it was cause the Dragon King and Griffon Queen threaded Kai and Teris, instead of them wanting to force imprint them); but this might further lean itself to the "Ptick was right" theory.

As for the Elemental's. The scene in the last chapter with His Purple Highness telling Nemuri all that was mostly just to further explain how knowledge spells work, and (needless as it currently is) let readers know Nemuri is set to be the Dryad King's successor and be Dryad Queen.

Here's a couple lines from that scene where HPH is remembering: "The aged Sphinx had warmed to him during their meeting and privately admitted to being the sole bearer of a knowledge spell that imprisoned an ancient and terrible evil. Not so ancient as the Elemental’s the elemental leader’s were imprisoning, the Sphinx leader had told him with a wink; the great Sphinx naturally aware of the knowledge spell his ancestors had helped His Purple Highness’ ancestors with."

Since the knowledge spell Shouta's grandfather passed onto a young, unknowing Teris and locked in her head is the one keeping All for One imprisoned, and Shouta's grandfather admitted to HPH (His Purple Highness) that the ancient and terrible evil the knowledge spell he carried wasn't keeping something as "ancient as the Elemental’s the elemental leader’s were imprisoning" it's safe to say that All for One isn't an Elemental and the Elemental's won't be playing a part.

Actually, I'll flat out tell you, the Elemental's won't be playing a part in this fic. One, because I got so many moving pieces in this fic that I don't wanna kill myself by adding the Elemental's. lol And two, because this fic is part of an original series, and (whether I end up making it a fanfic or original fic) I have later plans for the Elemental's and the world of Oblvi in a later book.

One last thing. Seeing as it was so small that most might have overlooked it, I will say that there is a hint at what All for One is in the opening scene of the latest chapter.

In any case, thanks for sharing your working theories! I really did love hearing them. Feel free to share any more if you get a chance and want. I hope some of my hints and leading questions helped you along. Thanks again!

[kate-read-that]

Everyone knows there's two groups in Scott's town: bikers and players. On one hand, bikers are a mess to be around: always looking for trouble, making noise, partying all over the city.... a mess. Th issue is, most have good grades and know enough about machines and motors and such to give classes to the mechanics from town.

On the other hand, players are nice looking, kind hearted, smart boys that never make a fuss and are always there to help the community however they can. Most are football players, runners and basketball players or all of those at the same time. They're a charm to be around, if you're lucky enough to get in their circle.

"Welcome to Pop's, please sit wherever, its early yet" says Peter to his friends, careful to keep equilibrium on his rollers.

"Thanks Mr, we'll take the same table we usually do" Steve laughs and goes sit at their usual table with the rest.

Serving the table next to them, pretty blond looks at Peter with adoration.

"Is Claire still trying to get you to ask her out, Peter" MJ asks, fully knowing the answer already. Peter whines.

"I've tried to discourage her in a million ways! I'm bi, but I'm not interested in her, I dont know why she doesnt get it!"

"Man shes hot and funny, what is there not to be interested about?" Sam asks, one broe arched in disbelief.

"If you like her, ask her out! That'll get her off me" Peter begs while writing down their orders, even thought theres no need.

They always order the same food and wait until Peter finishes his turn to go so something around the city, and tonight's no exception, until new company arrives.

The door opens to Tony S., major douchebag of the city, and his friends, the major dumbasses, Nat, Clint and Bucky B. Peter's friends instantly look awkward and pissed, and the other persons in the diner look at Tony's and his friends with dread. Who know what they might be up to. The fact that they cant be thrown off high school because his amazing grades pisses off a lot of people.

Peter swallows and calms himself. He hopes Tony wont cause problems in the diner, because that's the last thing he needs and tmhe really doesnt want to kick anyone out. Besides, he isn't sure how he would kick them out if he had to.

Despite his nervousness, he rolls to them and smiles politely: " Welcome to Pop's, please sit wherever, today is not as full"

"What about you sit on my lap, darling?" Tony claimed he was bi a long time ago; more than claimed, he was caught having sex with some guy under the major's statue. Peter counts to five so he doesnt reply to that.

"Choose whatever table you want, I'll go serve you right now" he then turns around to give the cooker his friends orders, hoping he doesnt look too startled.

Tony usually mocks them in high school, and they mock right back, but he has never said anything sexual to him. It's strange, thinking of him that way, like someone you can have sex with. Peter shakes his head and rolls back to Tony's table.

Nat and Clint are too busy signaling at each other to notice he's there, and Bucky is checking something on the other side of the diner. Peter is too shy to say something when no one is paying attention, so he waits until Tony tells his friends to shut up and order already because they're making Parker loose his time.

Peter looks at him surprised, but smiles and starts taking notes. Clint has a little bit problem to order, because his deaf and his parents couldnt teach him to talk until he got in school, but he manages. Peter likes Clint, he's nice and seems a good person, but he doesnt understand why he mixes with the rest.

Nat is adopted and she's always in trouble for this thing or the other, she's always quiet but when she talks is like she's always trying to test you, somehow. Bruce had to give her math classes for a while and he said she's actually not that bad, but she still scares Peter.

Buckys parents are cool, they let him leave alone, which sounds incredible, but hes always argues with teachers and missing class, and hes always inappropriate and rude to people.

And Tony's parents are as rich as it gets, but they like to live away from big cities so they're here until tony graduates. Peter doesn't know much about them, except that they no longer pick Tony up when he gets arrested so one of the members of their staff does it. His uncle Sam is a cop, and he says theres nothing sadder than parents that dont care about his son enough to get mad at him.

So Peter tries to be kind to them, but it's so hard when all they do is mock him and his friends. Besides, Tony always has the expression, like he's to good for everyone else! It drives Peter mad.

"I'm going to have the Burguer 6, with chips and a piece of that ass" Tony pretends to read seriously from the menu, but his friends dont laugh. Peter's tired of the jokes, but he needs the job and Tony is not going to ruin this for him.

"Sure thing, dude, maybe when hell freezes. What else?" The others do laugh this time, to Peter's confusion, and order their meals.

.....

"Dude he absolutely hates you" Bucky seems to find this hilarious, even though hes Tony's best friend and he should support him, dammit!

"Of course he had to wear shorts, not like I could keep my mind straight or something" Tony moans, watching Peter roll away like the cute doll he is.

"You're like an animal dude" Clint says, little sloppy but understandable.

"Pathetic" Adds Nat, as if Tony needed confirmation of the screw up.

"And besides, since when is your mind straight?" Bucky laughs at his own joke, like the idiot he is, Tony thinks, while checking the other side of the diner again.

"At least I dont stalk Rogers from here like some kind of pervert" Tony smiles wide at Bucky's affronted face, blushing and frowning. "Whatever".

"Dude, just tell him you're into him and ask him on a date, this suave shit is not your style" Clint signs, too tired to try and talk. Tony signs back "Suave is totally think you jerk!"

"Not when you care" Nat interrupts as direct as always, looking seriously at him. "Food here is good but if you did yourself a favor and went straight to it we wouldnt have to come here and hear you whine"

"Straight?" Bucky chimes again, entertained. Nat hits him in the back of the head "Idiot."

"I will, alright? I will"

Rught then, Peter comes back with their drinks and Tony leans back.

"I dont know what I like the most, you coming to me in those cute rolls or you going away in that killer short"

All his friends look at him exasperated, and Tony cant believe he actually said that to Peter. Hes never going to get a date with his cheesy fucking lines.

But Peter laughs. Not a big laugh, okay, but a short, cute one that he tries to hide.

"Maybe youd like me better without both, huh Tony?" He leans towards Tony a little, his hand on Tony's shoulder for a second.

Hes gone just as fast as he came, leaving the whole table shocked.

Tony knows he should close his mouth, but he cant believe Peter Parker just legit flirted back at him. What the hell? He needs a cold shower right now, and his friends need to stop looking at him.

"Did you pay him to say that or something" Tony knows Bucky is trying to be funny, but truth is he cant explain that act either, and when he looks at Nat and Clint for help, they're just staring at him like a third head just grew out.

...

Peter is hyperventilating.

"I cant believe I flirted back. What the hell is wrong with me?" His friends are looking at him like he just told them he likes to dance hula naked in december, and Peter cant blame them

"Huh, maybe the fact that you've had the hots for him for years?"MJs voice cuts the air. Peter looks at her in disbelief.

"I have not! He's arrogant and careless and despective and rude and..."

"And hot and intelligent and funny, in your opinion" MJ adds, smiling "I've seen you laugh at his jokes when you think no one is watching, and you cant deny hes hot and smary"

"Maybe you should date him"

"Dont be ridiculous, I'm leaning to girls in this period of my life. And he's into you, not me"

Peter couldnt believe MJ. He did not have the hots for Tony, and Tomy was not funny, not all the time anyway, and Tony Stark was not into Peter in any way, shape or form.

And yet he had felt so good flirting with him. Seeing his amazement when Peter had answered. For once, Tony was not in control of everything and playing his jokes, he was shocked.

And Peter did that to him.

So Peter decided, what the hell, let's try this out. If he ends up being an asshole, my friends will kick his ass for me.

"If you like him, go ahead, but he looks like too much trouble for me" Steve said, looking worried. He and Bucky had been childhood friends, but they bad separated later in life and Steve didn't like to be close to him or his friends, Tony included.

"Yeah, and if he's a jerk to you well talk to him" Sam smiled threatingly, clapping his hands.

"Nat is really nice to be around when you meet her" added a blushing Bruce, who had been crushing on the ginger since they met but was way too shy to say or do anything.

Peter kept working until he had to deliver Tony's food. He tried not to show he was nervous and he definitely didnt check his ass before going out the kitchen with the food.

"Number 6,8,12, and 3 for you guys, with chips for everyone and a piece of ass for Anthony" he looked at Tony intently, trying to guess his reaction. For a second Stark just stranded there, shocked, until he slapped Peter's ass so strongly all the diner turned around. Or maybe it was because Peter had let out the loudest moan a boy his size could produce.

Peter thought he was going to kill himself. What was that?? One thing is flirting,but that? He was so losing his job. Trying to keep as much dignity as he could, he said "That's more than a piece, and it hurt, you idiot" and he turned around and left, head high and eyes burning from shame.

....

Tony was going to kill himself.

"Dude, what the fuck? He was kidding you dumbass" Bucky, again, was laughing at him. Although this time Tony couldnt blame him, fuck it. What the hell was that?? It's not like Peter's bubble butt didnt deserve one or two good slaps, but Peter worked there!

On the other hand, how could have Tomy anticipated that Peter was going to react like that? That moan could have brought people from the death, nd it certainly brought some of Tony's parts as well.

"It seemed like he liked it" Nat said, like she was reading Tony's mind. She was trying to keep herself from laughing, while Clint signaled that he was scarred for life.

Tont got up without knowing what he was doing. People weren't looking directly anymore, but he knew they were still totally focused on his movements. He got in the staff room without problems. Apparently Claire was too shocked to say nothing about it.

As soon as he got in he saw Peter, sitting in a corner, head buried on his lap.

"Dude what the hell? Are you alright?" Tony rushed to him scared. Peter just laughed.

"You're kidding? I'm si getting fired after that. What the fuck, man? In which world is that an appropriate way of flirting?"

"So we were flirting?" Tony wanted to confirm, and he realized now he sounded like an ass.

"Oh my god you slapped my ass but you dodnt know we were flirting? Dude! You're all class arent you?" Peter frowned at him.

"Didnt seem like you cared" Tomy knew he was being a dick, but he couldnt help it when Peter was right there, all long legs and blushed and nervous and biting his goddamn lip making it even redder than usual. If possible, Peter got even more red. "I liked that a lot, but that doesnt mean you can do it in my job, you idiot"

"What about my place? When you finish here?" Tony knew he was going to be totally rejected after that but he had to try, right?

"Ah, no, I'm not letting you win after that. You're taking me on a date first, and if you behave I'll let you take me to your place and well see what happens" Peter said, knowing full well he was going to be ditched.

"Deal"

"Wait, you sirious?" Peter opened his eyes in disbelief.

"What, you're not?" Tony arched his brow.

"I am, I am. Okay, deal"

"Can I ask you something, before I leave?"

"What?"

"Would you wear those shorts to our date?"

[willofhounds]

I need to connect

https://archiveofourown.org/works/23330155

A/N Once again this will be another one-shot.

Warnings: No happy ending. Soulmate au. Aizawa/Izuku pair

"Speaking"

:Thoughts:

Aizawa's POV

Coffee in between hero work and before he was needed at the school was his usual routine. There was one shop in town that made the best roast. It was strong enough to keep him awake most mornings.

Shouta was more exhausted than normal, however. More than one cup was needed to keep him alert.

Heroes from all over the city were called in for a fight. Apparently, the Kings were at it again. Normally heroes didnt interfere with the Kings as they kept to themselves. However, the Red and Blue King were becoming increasingly public with their fights. It seemed almost as if a war between them was on the horizon.

Just before the appearance of quirks, there was a discovery in Germany. Scientists had found a Slate with unrecognizable carvings etched into it. They called it a relic and began to study it.

Germans and the Japanese thought it would create the next level of soldiers for war. Given the state of their world at the time it could have made the difference. If they could only learn how to forcefully activate the relic.

The relic was rightfully dubbed the Slate. By bringing mice as test subjects they found the Slate resonated with certain rats. When they resonated with it the rat would gain heightened intelligence or extra powers. Their powers were marked by a sword above their heads. It would be later named a Sword of Damocles.

Despite the scientists' best efforts, they were unable to get it to resonate with a human. Until a bombing run happened on their facility. More than half of the scientists were killed. Including a young scientist who was the twin sister of the head scientist.

Her brother was saved by the Slate's power and was given the power of the Silver Sword of Damocles. Adolf K. Weissman became the First and Silver King.

After that Japan took it back with them. A young Lieutenant became the Second and Gold King. With Weissman wanting nothing to do with the world any longer he took control over it.

As time passed it was revealed that there were 7 Swords of Damocles. Those who wielded the Swords and the powers that came with them were declared Kings. Kings only answered to themselves and in serious situations the Gold King.

Then came quirks and with the heroes. In the beginning heroes and villains alike fought against the Kings. It wasnt until the Gold King stepped in that peace between heroes and Kings resumed.

As long as innocents weren't injured the Kings would answer only to each other. Clansman had to answer to laws just like normal citizens. Though most ignored that rule. They felt the only ones they answered to were the Kings that commanded them.

Times were changing though. The Gold King was getting old and could no longer keep control over the younger generation. SCEPTER4 led by the Blue King stepped in when things got too dangerous. Or if the Red King was involved.

Heroes were beginning to be needed for rescues more often than before. SCEPTER4 could create shields to protect civilians but the flames of HOMRA were powerful. If the police even though it was HOMRA, SCEPTER4 would be immediately notified.

Heroes couldn't even put out the fire correctly until the Red King left. His mere presence was enough to keep the flames going.

Last night had been no different. Shouta helped rescue trapped civilians while SCEPTER4 tried to suppress HOMRA. At one point it appeared the Red King had lost control over his powers. Even at the first aid site half a mile away, they could feel the heat.

It was well after three am when the two groups dispersed. More than a dozen members of HOMRA were captured and arrested for their part in the destruction. None of them seemed particularly important and that frustrated the underground hero.

As he entered his favorite coffee shop he noted that it was mostly empty. A boy maybe in his late teens or early twenties was ordering at the counter. From the back all he could see was his green hair and that he was wearing a black t-shirt with jeans. The way he held himself spoke of quiet confidence.

The barista said cheerfully, "Its good to see you again, Midoriya. Your usual again today? How is Totsuka doing?"

Midoriya replied equally as cheerful, "I am well. Need Mr. Kusangi, Tatara, and Mr. Mikoto's coffee as well today. Mr. Kusangi was injured last night against the mafia group that's been causing trouble. Then the Blues showed up and only aggravated his injury. So Tatara and I will be running the bar."

There was a widening in the barista's eyes as she exclaimed, "Oh no! Poor Mr. Kusanagi. I know he means a lot to you guys. He's always looking after those of us who can't look after ourselves. Or those of us who are being bullied. Before HOMRA we had no one we could really go to for help. Heroes in this area are too overworked to help with anything like the mafia."

Shouta froze in surprise. HOMRA attacked a mafia group? That was why they were out last night?

That didnt fit their M.O. From what he learned they were a ragtag group who focused on their own needs. Heroes and the police never considered that there might be more behind the fights.

Midoriya answered, "We will always look after those that we can. If anyone else tries to let me or Tatara know. Or you drop by the bar anytime."

"Goodbye, Midoriya. Tell Mr. Kusanagi that we all hope that heals quickly."

Midoriya turned to face Shouta who stayed as relaxed as possible. He couldn't arrest this kid right now. Not only was he likely another small fry. Heroes and police couldn't take in a King or clansman unless they were committing a crime.

He was lucky that his hero clothes could be mistake for civilian clothes. Unless he pulled his goggles out from under his scarf then he wouldn't be seen as a hero.

Midoriya passed by him and because of the small space between Shouta and the door. Their shoulders bumped. Right where the soulmate mark that he had hidden every day since he decided he wanted to be a hero. The younger man didnt even pause as he went through the door.

Another thing that had appeared with quirks and King were soulmates. Most people had a soulmate and when they turned seven their mark appeared on their body. Shouta's was of a black cat with red eyes and a green bunny encircled by a red flame. Connecting the two animals were a white that looked like his capture scarf.

Something itched in the back of his mind. It felt off in a way but for the moment he ignored it. He needed information and this was the best spot to get it. A quick text to Hisashi asked his friend to watch his homeroom class.

With that done he approached the counter. The barista gave him a grin and inquired, "What can I get for you?"

Shouta replied nodding over his shoulder at the door, "Black coffee with two sugars, please. What can you tell me about that boy?"

"Midoriya?" She questioned absent-mindedly, "Honestly not much. I first met him when HOMRA first took him in. Word is that his mother was murdered by a villain. HOMRA took him in when his father abandoned him. Ever since that day he has not left them. Like most members, he is loyal to a fault."

"Do you know his first name?"

She nodded as she replied, "Izuku I believe. Izuku Midoriya."

That was all the information she could give on the teenager. It was enough however that he could start an investigation when he got back to the school.

As he expected both Hizashi and Nemuri cornered him as soon as he returned. They were curious about why he would be late. It wasn't often that he was late beyond a few minutes.

With some well-timed snaps, he was able to get then to back off. He didnt want to get them involved until he was sure about the boy. That would require research.

What he found was alarming. Izuku Midoriya was classified as a missing person but presumed dead. Inko Midoriya had been murdered by an unknown villain in their home when he was just 6 years old. Hisashi Midoriya had taken custody of the child for a short time before he disappeared.

Three months after the murder of his wife Hisashi filed a missing person's report on Izuku. The police searched but there were no signs of the boy. It was as if he disappeared off the face of the earth.

If he was picked up by HOMRA then that would make sense. If Midoriya was part of the fighting then the higher ranking members would protect him until he could protect himself.

Shouta's estimation of his age was right on the mark. Midoriya was 17 almost eighteen now. He had been with HOMRA for over a decade. That would make the bonds thicker than blood. It would also make him one of the first clansmen.

When the mother was murder Mikoto Souh had only been a King for a few months. Would a King mark a child as a clansman was the question. There wasn't enough information to answer it.

In the afternoon he took a nap in preparation for the upcoming evening. He awoken not by his alarm but by his soulmate mark burning like it was on fire. Anger that was not own coursed through his mind.

A moment later his phone went off. An officer said on the other side where explosions could be heard, "Eraserhead! You need to get down to the Southside immediately. Villains have acted HOMRA's base!"

Fuck! Absolutely nothing good could come of this.

Izuku's POV

He ducked behind Mikoto as a blue flamed villain rushed at HOMRA. The heat that his King gave off in response even made members of HOMRA flinch. They were strong and resistant to fire. That did not make them invincible, however.

There wasn't time to hide behind his King. He had a job to do that only he could perform.

Most of the clan were heavy tanks like fighters. There were three who preferred to stay out of the fighting.

One was Anna Kushina. She was the princess of HOMRA. Like Izuku she had been taken in when her family abandoned her. She was born a Strain. Someone who had abilities but they didnt come from a King. She could see the auras of Kings and clansmen. As a second ability given when she became a clansman, she gained a location ability. They thought she had a slight clairvoyance ability but it was hard to tell.

The second was Tatara Totsuka. He was a friend of Mikoto and Izumo before HOMRA was founded. Tatara held the ability to calm the hearts of those around him. In all the years he had known the older man he had never seen him fight. Always using his ability to stop a fight before it truly began.

Finally was Izuku. After his mother was murdered by a villain and his father abandoned him Mikoto took him in. With the help of Izumo and Tatara, he learned what he would in school. Through Mikoto, he learned how to fight.

Unlike the others, Izuku could use his flames in a fight. The difference was that he chose not to. He held the ability of barriers. Drawing runes in blood activated flame barriers. If you did not carry the mark of the Third King then you could not pass through the barrier.

It wasnt a perfect technique. The amount of time it took to create the runes in made him a target. Though he found out if they weren't removed then they could be used multiple times.

There were traps laid all around the bar for just such an event. Still, he had to set extra rune circles. That would make the barriers stronger. It also gave Yata and Rikio time to evacuate the civilians.

As he finished drawing the final rune he sat back on his heels. Blood dripped from his palm onto the ground. To get adequate blood to draw runes with he had to cut open his palm. He activated his red aura cauterizing the wound. Another pink and silver scar appeared on his palm.

Bringing up his wrist he tapped on his watch calling Yata. The younger boy answered, "Yo?"

"Are all the civilians evacuated? The runes are drawn and ready to be activated," he said watching as Izumo's flames struck out at the villains.

The villains were a tag team that he had seen before on the news. One had a size quirk that allowed his body to grow to enormous sizes. The other could shrink whatever they touched. Including organic materials.

It made sense that Izumo was the one fighting him. Izumo used his lighter to attack at long range. He was the strategist of HOMRA.

Yata replied, "All civilians are evacuated. We are ready for a full-on attack. Be ready to raise the barriers. Yata out!"

Izuku shouted disconnecting his phone, "As soon as Yata and Rikio enter the circle I'll activate the barrier! Anyone not suited for this fight fall back and assist the injured civilians!"

"Sir!"

Members of HOMRA sprung into action. The lower members ran towards the villains. They would keep the villains from escaping. The middle-ranked members were leaving the area to assist the civilians.

Two taps to his shoulder signaled that Yata and Rikio were entering the barrier site. A twinge of annoyance went through the back of his mind. It wasn't his own annoyance. This wasnt the time to think about such a thing though. He had to set the barrier.

Izuku put himself on the battle side of the barrier. Cutting open his hand again he placed his bloodied palm on the primary rune circle. A black shadow rushed across the barrier line into the fighting. It was already too late to stop him from activating his aura the circle's flames erupted from them. It formed a barrier of fire.

He shouted above the fighting, "King barrier is set!"

Mikoto only turned to give him a slight nod. Then nonchalantly joined the fight. Even against villains with quirks he never went all out. The only time Izuku ever sees him get serious was against Reisi Munakata.

Reisi and Mikoto fought like cats and dogs. It was because they were order and chaos in terms of their powers. Blue and red Kings were forever destined to clash. No one could say otherwise.

Izuku stood ready to join the fight when he found an unwelcome sight within the barrier. A man in black sweats with a scarf wrapped around his shoulders stood there. Covering his eyes were a pair of yellow goggles.

It took a moment for Izuku to recognize him. It was the man he bumped into at the coffee shop. Those goggles themselves struck a cord within Izuku. They looked just like the one on his soulmate mark.

His mind was racing. They bumped shoulders in the coffee shop. That was when he started feeling emotions that weren't his. The shoulder that he bumped held his soulmate mark.

The man asked watching the fights as they broke out, "What is going on here?"

Izuku pulled a lighter from his pocket as he said, "Villains attacked our home. Without heed of the civilian's homes that line our streets they attacked. Low and middle-ranking members kept them busy while everyone else evacuated civilians. HOMRA may seem like reckless thugs to you, hero but we care for those who cannot defend themselves. The barrier of fire was only set when everyone was gone."

Eyes widened behind the goggles. Izuku could feel the man's surprise and understanding. Everyone looked down upon HOMRA for being a gang of thugs. The lower-ranked members fit that bill more than the higher-ranked.

Outside of fighting with the Blues HOMRA tended to keep to themselves. It was only when one of their own was threatened that they picked fights.

Izuku was startled by a flash of movement that did not belong to the fighters. Just inside the doorway of the bar stood Anna and Tatara.

What in the twelve hells were they doing outside of the bar? Orders were to stay in King's room.

Mikoto snapped, "Midoriya! Protect Totsuka!"

That had him moving ignoring the possibility that he ran into his soulmate.

:No Blood. No Bone. No Ash,: he chanted within his mind.

The tiny embers that lay just beneath the surface of his skin erupted into flames. He didn't need the cadence for setting barriers. If he wanted to fight then he needed the embers ignited into a true flame.

Rushing to Tatara's side he checked on both he and Anna. They were in good health. Simply watching the fight between the clan and the villains.

The lighter in his hands was just like the one Izumo carried. In fact, most of the middle-ranked members and higher had one. It didnt matter if you smoked or not. The lighters carried the mark of HOMRA engraved into the metal.

They were a right of passage for every clansman. After serving the clan for a year each clansman was given a lighter and a pack of cigarettes carrying the mark. They would forever be a reminder. No matter where you went or if their paths strayed from that of the clan. They would forever be apart of HOMRA.

Izuku used him as a long-range weapon. The metal was strong enough to withstand the flames of his King after all. It would be a waste not to use it when he didnt smoke.

Watching the fight play out was just like the others. Misaki Yata the red-haired vanguard attacked using his skateboard for speed and extra power. Both he and Rikio acted as tanks. They hit hard and blocked attacks meant for the King.

Izumo was watching for any sort of opening to land long distant attacks. The stiffness of his posture spoke of the pain he was in. Under normal circumstances, he wouldn't even be in the battle but it was all hands on deck with this attack.

And the King... Mikoto was never one to go with any plan other than his own. The man had heat radiating off of him. Nearby metal object began to distort the closer he got to them. The two villains froze as Mikoto closed in on them.

Above their heads was the Red Sword of Damocles in its glory. Their fires were feeding off of its strength. Fires that were nothing in comparison to the King's.

A rough sounding unfamiliar voice said next to him, "So this is the power of a King. I have not seen this up close like this before."

It was the man from the shop. What was he doing following Izuku?

Izuku responded with a growl, "This is just Mikoto toying with them. Only us clansmen are truly giving it our all. We wish to end this before the Blues decide to make an appearance. Who are you?"

The goggle bearing man replied, "I am the underground hero Eraserhead. I've seen the destruction your people cause. It's hard to believe that you would be attacked without provoking it."

"You're just like everyone else," Izuku bit out scathingly, "You only see what we do in the present second. You don't see past that at why we do what we do. Or at what cost..."

A hand closed around his shoulder cutting Izuku off. A pleasantly warm and calming fire went through him. It calmed his anger at the man in front of him.

Looking back he saw the warm light brown eyes of Tatara staring at him. There was a slight shake of the man's head. Izuku took a deep breath to calm his anger.

Heroes were all the same. They looked down upon the clans. Thought so little of them that they were little more than villains. That wasn't the truth, however.

HOMRA took a lot of the blame for people just having fire quirks. It was easier to write off for the police than spending time actually investigating. They didnt deserve that kind of reputation. HOMRA looked after each other. The eyes were family. Sometimes the only family that they could count on.

Tatata said his eyes turning cold in a way that was rarely seen for the soft-spoken blond, "You should not underestimate a clan's determination. Or let what you see on the outside affect your judgment," then something shifted in his face and the Tatara so lover why the clan returned, "Come by the bar sometime. Find out who we really are and what it means to be HOMRA."

There was that gentleness that showed a scared child that there was still good in this world. With his insistence, Izuku was taken in by HOMRA. He became the youngest clansman of the red clan.

Eraserhead huffed and a flash of annoyance went through Izuku. It wasn't his own. The soulmate bond there was no denying it any longer.

Then suddenly the man leaped forward. Using his scarf he attacked the villain that had strayed to close to them. A quick knee to the face and the villain was out cold. It all happened in an instant. If he had not been watching he would have missed it entirely.

The second one who was already pinned to the ground painfully by the vanguards. Yata had his foot planted in the villain's back. The others had his hands tied so that he couldn't getaway.

Mikoto called out, "Brat, take down the barrier. We will hand these two over tonight," Mikoto bent down to growl at the one they had pinned.

It was too far for Izuku to hear but he had an idea. Most likely a threat for them to never return to the city. While not all of it was HOMRA territory they would know if these two came back. If they did they would not survive the second encounter.

Concentrating on the runes he destroyed the primary rune circle. The barrier fell with it. The flames dissipating almost immediately. The buildings and roads were scorched but without any permanent damage.

Almost as soon as they fell the area was swarmed with police, SCEPTER4, and heroes. Choosing to ignore them he went to check on members of his clan. A handful of lower-ranked members had some broken bones but nothing too serious. Izumo was by far the worst off. He tore his stitches in the fighting. Pale he was barely able to remain standing.

As third in command of the clan Izuku began barking orders. That had the ranks moving and taking the injured inside the bar. The uninjured formed a perimeter in order to keep out unwanted guests.

Mikoto and the higher ranking members faced off with SCEPTER4. They were tired from fighting with the two villains but they would stand their ground.

Eraserhead called out, "Heroes stand down," eyes turned towards the man questioning his order, "HOMRA did not start this fight. They were attacked by these villains. As is their right they protected themselves and subdued them."

Police and heroes alike gave them wary looks and a wide berth. The vanguard released the unconscious villain while Eraserhead put cuffs on his. Mikoto aided Izumo back into the bar followed soon by Tatara and Anna.

Izuku stayed to answer the police and heroes' questions as well as those from SCEPTER4. A small smile crossed his face when he caught Reisi glancing at the bar with carefully concealed worry. Only six people knew this but Reisi and Izumo were soulmates. Their soul marks were of the Red and Blue Swords of Damocles circling in harmony. An action very rarely seen in their time.

As much as he disliked the clan itself he would not deny the man information. If it was him he would hope someone would alert him on the changes of his soulmate.

As the heroes and police began to disperse the civilians returned to their homes. Many called out thanks to Izuku and asked him to wish his clan well.

He approached the Blue King cautiously eyeing the stiffening members of SCEPTER4. Reisi held up his hand to stop them from coming any closer then stepped so that he met Izuku halfway. A flash of jealousy went through Izuku but he quashed it knowing it was not his own.

Izuku said with a small smile, "He overextended himself," there was a furrowing of the King's brow as the only sign of his worry, "Don't worry he will be fine in a few days."

There was a near-silent sigh of relief and tension released from the other's shoulders. In a whisper, Reisi said, "Thank you. Look after him and Souh. Those two are always getting into some trouble."

Then he turned and began barking orders. Slowly even SCEPTER4 began to leave. Then only Izuku and Eraserhead were left. With a glare in the man's direction, Izuku turned to head inside the bar.

[sraawrats]

🦇🎃Kana’s Halloween Hangover Rec List🎃🦇

Love Halloween? Not ready for it to be over? No worries! Old and new, these are some of my favorite spooky, suspenseful, and supernatural Kylux reads--perfect for drawing out your favorite month a little longer!

which is 100% why i’m posting this on november 1st, definitely not because i didnt manage to finish it before yesterday. nope, not at all

My Baby’s a Devil in the Bedroom | @callmelyss

- E - 4/5 chapters, 14 645 words - “Oh, obviously.” Kylo let out a shaky laugh and ran both hands through his hair. “Wait, no, you’re serious. You’re a fucking demon.”

“Well, yes, not to put too fine a point on it.” Hux smiled, clearly pleased with himself at the joke. “Or more accurately, I’m a succubus. A sex demon.”

—

Kylo has an unusual squatter. He's pretty fine with it. -

This fic is seriously amazing. It’s a super fun idea, the dialogue is hilarious, and it perfectly balances the sweetness and humor with angst/intrigue. Plus, I’m absolutely taken with snarky, smug, candy-tasting succubus Hux <3 <3

strange phenomenon | @brawlite, @kyluxtrashcompactor

- E - 8/8 chapters, 65 756 words - Kylo Ren is haunted by recent tragedy. He answers an ad posted by one Armitage Hux for a roommate, and he thinks a fresh start will help him begin to heal. He brings next to nothing with him from the past when he moves in.Or so he thinks. -

This fic is wonderfully suspenseful, and perfect if you’re looking for something to keep you on the edge of your seat. I also had a lot of Han feels when reading this one. Overall it’s just really nicely well-rounded with heartfelt and genuine characterizations, good spooks, and some searing sexual tension.

Something Wicked | @marlonbookcase

- G - 7/7 chapters, 22 514 words -  Kylo and Armitage have been friends since they were kids. Now in university, they run a semi-popular YouTube channel called "London Below" where they investigate all sorts of haunted and paranormal happenings in and around London and try to answer the question, are ghosts real? When they take on the mysterious and tragic case of the Pendle Witches, they come face to face with the spirit world in a way they never have before. Will they make it out of Pendle alive? Are ghosts real? And most importantly, does Armitage return Kylo's affections? -

I love Buzzfeed Unsolved. I love Kylux. I love this fic. A lot. As it says in the description, it’s not an exact Unsolved AU, but it really captured the format/feel of the “paranormal investigator” genre, so if you’re a fan of that, you’ll love this. Bonus points for some mutual pining and sugary fluff 👀👀

Second Spring, First Fall | @huxandthehound

- T - 5/? chapters, 7 018 words -  Nothing brings people together quite like the holidays. Well, maybe not Halloween... After a scare, Hux has to confront his neighbor. Lucky for him, Kylo might be a little sweeter than his tricks let on. -

A cute multi-chap made of Huxloween prompt fills! Lighthearted, but it’s still got that Halloween spirit. Plus I’ve got a soft spot for sweet modern AU Kylo :))

Some Strange and Unnerving Events | @longstoryshortikilledhim

- E - 10/10 chapters, 158 815 words -  As a boy in a dreary school on the moors, Kylo Ren had only one friend, a red-headed boy whose sharp tongue and wit drew Kylo to him. But that friend was taken from him. Now grown, Kylo goes into the service of the master of Stormfield Hall, the enigmatic Lord Arkanis, who is seeking a tutor for his charge. Kylo's past will come rushing back to him, both in his new employer and some unusual circumstances that bring to the fore powers that Kylo thought long-suppressed. -

This fic hit me like a ton of bricks. This fic hit me like TWO tons of bricks. Start this one when you’re ready to be feeling it for a few days afterwards. It’s an incredible historical AU with magic and a great murder mystery--it basically pushes, like, all of my buttons. And it’s /genuinely/ spooky, I had to start keeping a light on while I read it. Oh, and it features definitely my favorite Millicent ever. If you’ve got the time for something long, go for this one.

Reach Out in the Darkness | unicornsandbutane

- E - 2/2 chapters, 9 321 words - Having spent a decent amount of time researching the history and folklore of Arkanis, Cadet Hux strikes out one chilly evening in search of some legendary creature that's supposed to be extremely powerful. If the myths aren't true, all he's wasted is time. But, if they are based in some actual fact, then what a boon such an entity would be to his cause. He doesn't know what he will find, but he is prepared for any (absolutely ANY) eventuality. -

Tentacle monster Kylo. I am unapologetic. It’s really good.

Witchfeather | Whatever21ism

- E - 14/? chapters, 16 015 words - Armitage Hux is a new witch trying to establish himself in a new town. One day he goes out seeking a familiar, particularly a cat, somehow instead he ends up with a raven who is much more than they appear to be. -

A favorite of mine! Apothecary witch Hux & his crow familiar Kylo. There’s some really nice worldbuilding and crow Kylo is super cute. Possibly abandoned, but defs worth checking out what’s there & showing the author some love.

First Order Investigations | @mistresseast

- Unrated - series, 3 works, 58 094 words, incomplete - Hux and Phasma have been running First Order Investigations since high school, and Dr. Snoke's metaphysical research graduate program seemed like the perfect opportunity to pursue their interests under the protective umbrella of academia. Unfortunately, that meant allowing Snoke's personal project, a taciturn medium named Kylo Ren, to join their team. Hux and Kylo mix like oil and water, or, more accurately, like fire and gasoline, and Hux is convinced that working effectively with Kylo is absolutely impossible. They hate each other, and Hux is content to leave it that way.

But then, a case in the sweltering heat of South Carolina begins to change things between them, and Hux finds himself questioning not only Kylo's feelings, but his own as well. -

Paranormal Investigator AU of the highest quality. The detail and thought put into each investigation site is incredible. I love this fic to pieces, and if you like ghost stories, you will too.

Undead | @heyktula, @splinteredscript

- E - series, 2 works, 6 855 words, incomplete - They’ve been circling around each other for years. Kylo Ren, the most powerful vampire in Supreme Leader Snoke’s house, and Armitage Hux, the human liaison between the world of mortals and that of eternal darkness. Baiting, taunting, the cord between them growing ever tighter.Sooner or later, one of them is going to snap. -

A lovely and dark vampire AU~~ Gives off some real classic Kylux vibes, and is an absolute pleasure to read :D

Fixer Upper | @irisparry

- T - 5/7 chapters, 10 034 words - When Armitage Hux starts with First Order estate agents, he thinks the house on Alderaan Drive is an insult, a patronising set of training wheels for the new boy. He is ... not correct. -

Adorable haunted house AU! I love both of their characterizations in this one, especially shy, grumpy ghost Kylo~

Hair of the Dog That Bit You | @theweddingofthefoxes

- M - 9/9 chapters, 21 597 words -  Ren owns a popular tavern, and Armitage is a respected physician in town and the surrounding villages. Their years-long friendship will survive anything -- even the bite of a werewolf. Won't it? -

Full disclosure, I haven’t actually finished this one-- I have a tendency to get distracted unless I finish something in one sitting, rip. But I remember being SUPER stoked about starting it, and anything by weddingofthefoxes is guaranteed to be a treat, so I’m putting it on here anyway :D tbh now that I’m thinking about it again I’ll probably finish it tonight.

The Eldritch Effect | @generallyhuxurious

- E - 17/17 chapters, 67 899 words - For the last three years Major Donal A. Hux, formerly of the British Army's Parachute Regiment, and Kylo Ren, estranged son of US Defence Secretary Leia Organa, have been tooling around North America investigating "weirdness"- and they're plenty weird themselves. Their latest tip off is leading them towards a haunting in rural Alabama. But first they need to make a stop in Trinity, South Carolina... -

A real goofy Paranormal Investigators AU that I super love (but I also need to catch up on rip). It’s an American Gothic AU, but you don’t need to have any knowledge of the show to follow along (I don’t). It also comes with a series of oneshots set in the universe but outside the main plotline, so when you finish the fic and inevitably want more, you’re covered ;)

blackbird, fly | @acroamatica

- M - 19 265 words - One sunny afternoon in the mountains of Washington state, Ben Organa-Solo walked out into the woods.

He never came home.

Six years later, a journalist specialising in missing-persons cold cases decides to follow his footsteps and see where they might lead. -

This is a sad beautiful horror AU that is very close to my heart. The writing is just gorgeous and the suspense is beautifully done. Also, it about doubled the amount of emotions already attached to the song Blackbird for me (I still get a little heart-squeeze every time I hear it)

what’s real or isn’t | @brawlite

- E - 12/12 chapters, 57 398 words - Hux's new house is not haunted. It isn't. -

Super surreal haunted house AU. There’s also monster sex. This is definitely a staple of spooky Kylux fics :D

How to Kill a Living Thing | hedgerowhag

- E - 10/10 chapters, 25 394 words - It starts like any other horror movie: a young man moves into a strange old house full of relics of the past and becomes haunted by some strange entity. However, Ren doesn't find the monster that he expects. -

This one has got some of the most stunning, spooky visuals I’ve ever read. I could picture every scene and character so clearly. Plus, I love Hux’s characterization--he’s kind of a shit, and it’s beautiful.

Twenty-Six Weeks | @vmprsm

- E (eventually) - series, 4 works, 28 539 words, probably complete - Two mature adults need to do two things: live an a house with a stranger for six months, and keep their secrets to themselves. How hard could that be?

Apparently very. -

The author made a point of trying not to give too much away in the summary/tags, so I won’t either :D I’ll just say it’s one of my favorites, and definitely worth a read if you haven’t already~~

The Brief Wondrous Return of Vampire Boy | @hollyhark

- T - 21 190 words - Two days before Halloween, Hux hears a rumor that Ben Solo is back in town. While Hux does not believe the sensational version-- that his estranged childhood friend/enemy escaped from an asylum and is out for revenge --he is left on edge as to how to proceed. -

One of my favorite Halloween fics; it really encompasses the feel of fall/Halloween but also, like, good ol’ ~teenage bullshit~. There’s a lot of creepy Snoke stuff, some dealing with the fallout, and a nice hopeful ending :))

Ghost Encounters of the Hux Kind | carefulren

- T - 9/9 chapters, 25 610 words - Kylo purchases an old, abandoned house in order to get away from his family. He just wants the chance to be alone for a while, and he considers this house as the start of his new, isolated freedom.

Everything is going as smoothly as possible, until it's not.

Perhaps, Kylo isn't living alone after all.-

A sweet and soft ghost  story AU. I adore the ending <3 <3 

Spookylux Huxloween 2018 | @nofootprintsinsalt

- T - series, 31 works, 36 896 words, complete - Huxloween 2018 - 31 benarmie fics in 31 days -

A series of benarmie fluff/horror for the Huxloween prompts this year! These were so so fun to read throughout the month and I adore the little universe that develops as they go on :))

Of Our Time | @ezlebe

- E - 15 297 words - “Do you know how many people would think it’s weird you walk around in the day?”

Hux grits his teeth in vain against an uncanny sensation, his own words digging and clawing up his throat to leave behind the taste of blood and bitterness thick on his tongue. “I could care less. I was made this way before there were movies – before fucking Stroker. Call me a demon if it makes you feel better.” -

I only read this really recently, and I was BLOWN AWAY. Seriously, this packs so much into 15k--it’s got feels, it’s got lore, it’s got steamy smut. What more could one ask for?

Shiver The Whole Night Through | @theweddingofthefoxes

- T- 5/5 chapters, 7 977 words - Ren's always loved hunting, so when he's told his paid time off won't roll over into the next year, he decides to take a week, get his gun and rent a cabin in the woods. But it takes no time at all for the hunter to become the hunted. -

This one’s very accurately tagged “Mind Games,” which really made it stand out to me--I do love a good spooky woods story~~

The Ghost Under My Bed | @longstoryshortikilledhim

- E - 19 525 words - Amateur witch, aspiring actor and full-time family fuckup Ben Solo discovers that his house is being haunted. Best part? His very own poltergeist, Armitage Hux, is kinda cute. Worst part? Well. He's dead. -

THIS IS THE SWEETEST GHOST STORY. I love it so so much. The sweetness of their relationship set against the sad backdrop of both of their histories gives this one a really unique feel. And the ending is guaranteed to give you the warm fuzzies <3

--

aaaand that’s all, folks! Lord, this post turned into a behemoth lmao. I just. really love supernatural stuff. (on that note, if anyone has read/written anything even tangentially spooky/supernatural, feel free to send it my way. I will happily give it a read ;)))

Happy reading! ^_^

[siriuslyarrogant]

Snapshots of a teenage heartbreak

I didnt want to genderbend the characters or change the pronouns of the song. The song , She by Dodie is here

/Am I allowed to look at her like that? Could it be wrong when she's just so nice to look at?/

Jack first notices him across the ice - how didn't he notice before in the locker room or the meetings. His eyes are bright and gleaming and the way he moves on the ice is a thing of beauty. Jack realises it's not admiration for a teammate when Kent catches his eye and smiles. Jack's heart is beating out of his chest. Jack knows that keeping this hidden is going to make him paranoid - it will give his brain more to worry about. However Jack thinks Kent's smile might be worth it.

/I'd never tell. No I'd never say a word./

Kent's smile isn't worth it. Not when it's also shining bright when their teammates are joking about in the locker room. Joking about it like it isn't something that makes Jack want to shut himself in the bathroom and curl in on himself. He could make them stop - he's the captain, they would listen to him. But Kent is making it into some crazy story, playing up the golddigger storyline like it's some movie. Then one of their teammates - Thomson - finally has enough of Kent's performance and says "Shut the fuck up. No wonder Zimmermann isn't giving you the chance to pawn his money off him, you're so goddamn annoying."

Another teammate - this time Scott, Jack thinks, says "Yeah, he'll probably have to go through all the girls in Canada before even thinking about a guy taking his cash - much less you."

They're wrong. They're so wrong but Jack can't correct them, his feet are struck and his eyes are avoiding Kent's. Jack is going to have to get uses to controlling his heartbeat and remembering that people can't read his brain. Remembering no one knows how he feels. Remembering to not yell out that they shouldn't treat their teammates like that and that his first choice would be Kent - always will be.

/And oh it aches. But it feels oddly good to hurt./

Jack has been ignoring Kent for the past two days - asides from a couple times at practice. He does to see if it would get rid of some of his feelings - it doesn't. Jack knew falling for Kent was a bad idea, terrible for his future and awful for his mental health - yet he did it. It's not Kent's fault so Jack shouldn't blame him - can't blame him really. Every time Jack thinks about kissing Kent his hands shake but still there is about a hundred scenarios in that Jack thinks about doing it. Maybe one day if Jack actually does kiss him, his hands won't shake.

/And I'll be okay. Admiring for afar./

Sometimes all Jack needs is Kent meeting his eye across the rink or, seeing him laugh with their teammates at a party or, bobbing his head to music while studying, to be happy. To remind himself that this is enough. That he doesn't have to take Kent on dates or say "That's my boyfriend" when Kent scores a goal, to still be Kent's.

/Cause even when she's right next to me we could not be more far apart./

They had another fight. It might've been Jack's fault this time - but he stopped counting long ago. Jack doesn't know how it started this time but it ended the same as always - with Kent mentioning the draft. He knows Kent finishes their fights like that so that he will win. Kent knows that Jack will close off when he mentions it. Jack also knows that Kent doesn't know that nearly everytime he says something about being first pick, afterwards Jack has take another pill. Even though Jack actually thinks Kent should go first, not him. Just everyone will criticise Jack if he doesn't be the best of the best.

/Cause she tastes like birthday cake and story time and fall. But to her. I taste of nothing at all./

Jack is laying in a hospital bed. He knows he missed the draft, knows that is where Kent is, knows that's why Kent isn't here. But Jack still wants him, he tries to explain to his parents that he wants to see Kent but they just say he needs rest.

It's the day after the draft and the doctor asks him if he purposely took too much, if the pressure of hockey was too much. Jack answers honestly and when the doctor lets his parents in he hopes Kent is also with them - he's not. His parents say he's on the plane to Las Vegas. Jack lost him and hockey at the same time. Somehow this wasn't one of the scenarios in which he thought he would.

---

/And she smells like lemongrass and sleep. She tastes like apple juice and peach./

In between the 8 hours of the draft and getting on a plane to Vegas, Kent tries to tell his mum he has to go see Jack. His mum just says that Jack needs rest and Kent can see him later. Kent is going to be across the country, later. His mum must realise that he needs to be alone because she leaves their hotel room to get some ice.

In the scenarios Kent thought up about his draft day he was always with Jack. He would wake up on the day of the draft with Jack in his bed and then they would go first and second. It wouldn't matter what order. Kent had a million goodbye speeches ready for when one of them headed to New York and the other to Las Vegas. Kent didn't think the last thing he would do with Jack before leaving was kiss him goodnight two days before the draft. He didn't think to remember how it felt to kiss him. Didn't think to make last forever.

/You would find her in a Polaroid picture. And she means everything to me./

Before getting on the plane, Kent opens his wallet to see the photo he put there over a year ago of him and Jack. He remembers the day Alicia took it, they were laughing at Bob. Kent's smiling at Jack like he is the best thing ever. Kent still thinks that. Will always think that. Jack Zimmermann will always be the best thing that happened to Kent. And Kent doesn't know if Jack will ever talk to him again.

[izzyhcnds]

for the ask me things, all the ones featuring the numbers 4, 6 and 8.

….sophie…. omg…. i love this. thank you. im going to put these answers under a cut because i got a bit chaotic while answering these and it ended up very long. update: tumblr sucks and i cant seem to put in a cut so im very sorry if this takes up your whole dash.4: Do you drink? yes! I didn’t for a long time but then i became a #disaster

6: Age you get mistaken for? like around 18 ish. though i am still occasionally carded for 16 things.

8: Want any tattoos? i do! but I have never decided on one for long enough to actually want to get it so maybe in a while if i still like the idea i have just now! 

14: Biggest turn offs smokingggggggggggggggggggggg. the smell just doesn’t come off and i hate it

16: I’ll love you if you’re a genuine person. cant stand people who are just all mean or all nice. theres something wrong with everyone but theres still no need to be nasty. 

18: Most traumatic experienceheres a fun trauma instead - i dislocated and broke my toe by walking into a doorframe…. six months later i did it again. on the same damn door. i stopped coming in contact with that door, so i thought i might finally be safe. Earlier this year I went to london. my friend and i were going to go out dancing. i poured my first drink. didnt even take a god damn sip. i walked into the bed. my toe popped right the fuck out. i had to phone the nhs emergency line and had to figure out if i was being a wimp. i was not being a wimp. hopped down to reception, ordered a taxi, got to the hospital and gave everyone a laugh as i fully knew what i was doing with the xrays and the laughing gas. it was a Night. we met a cute boy too and bonded over our broken feet and how hard it was to hop. his name was george. miss you boo. 

24: My relationship with my parent(s) its good. i still live with them, which can be a bit… tense. 

26: My biggest pet peeves people eating with their mouths open

28: A description of the person I dislike the mostfun fact theres quite a list! but the most? hes orange, his name rhymes with Ronald Rump and is rapidly taking away the rights of our trans siblings, which is wholly unacceptable. Remember to talk to your representatives and tell them shit like that isnt okay!!. 

34: What I find attractive in women?god i dont even know it changes so damn much cause every pretty girl i see is suddenly the prettiest girl ive ever seen. A genuine smile is usually a constant though.

36: Where I would like to liveI love scotland and i think i always want my home to be here but i’d love to travel some more.

38: My childhood career choicefor most of my life i thought id be dead at 21 (not like a SH thing, i was just convinced going to be murdered or that god was going to smite me) so i never really thought about it, I just did what ever i liked in that moment. 40: Who wish I could bei want to be a bit more badass, so ive started learning a couple of weapons and weightlifting. so thats fun. 

41: Where I want to be rightnow so i work in a windowless room so the simple answer is anywhere but here. more specifically im hanging out with my friends and playing boardgames tonight so there or at my friends where im going for tea tomorrow. im excited.

42: The last thing I ate porridge! 

43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediatelyPhoebe Tonkin. I’ve had such a constant crush on her, H20, Secret Circle, The Vampire Diaries/ Originals,, ugh. i loved them all. 

44: A random fact about anythingi always have very detailed day dream on the go, right now our world has just become the atla world and everything is amazing and awesome. its like i can see it. 45: Selfiei took this when i was on my day off from presenting my research at conference and i like it but i never posted it anywhere. my hotel room was great i loved it.