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gguk-n · 3 months ago

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Max Unravelled

Unravelling Max's Mystery (Max Verstappen x Online Friend!Reader)

Series Masterlist

Summary- Max accidentally made an account on google plus in 2013. He came across a poetry page and enjoyed reading them. He ends up friends with the poet. He loved the normalcy she brought to his life. He didn't realise when the comfort he felt for her turned into love.

{Max's POV}

2013

I was searching for something on my gmail account when a pop up for google plus came through; without much thought I clicked on it. Some how, I'm yet to figure that out, I ended up with a google plus account. One of the few accounts I got recommended was a poetry and story account. They wrote very eloquently; I could feel the emotions in every word. I started reading all their posts in my spare time and even commenting on the ones I liked. I found my self constantly checking back to their page to see if they posted something. Their poetry was relatable and understandable. I hope they always have a good day since their words always pick me up when I'm down.

The poet I had been enjoying so much is a girl, and her name is Y/N. She's around my age; I guess that's why I related to her work so much. We spoke for the first time ever on her birthday. She made a post about it being her birthday so I wished her. She was sad about not being able to enjoy her birthday, I felt bad for her so we talked for a while until dad called me to practise. That was the start of our friendship. We ended up talking on google plus a lot. We shared the same sense of humour and best of all, she didn't know about racing. It was like a breath of fresh air to not talk about racing. She doesn't even seem interested in it; so I can live as Max for a while now.

My birthday was shit but talking to her made everything better. I can't believe I got excited about talking to someone and that someone made me feel good even on one of my shittiest days. She's one of the nicest people I've had the pleasure of talking to. I really do wanna talk to her on phone, typing everything I want to say out feels tedious.

2014

I've gotten busier since this year with Formula 3. We barely get to talk anymore. She did send me her number and we chat on Whatsapp whenever we can. But obviously it is not the same. I've suggested talking on call a few time and she finally agreed; I just need to find the perfect time to get away from everything to talk to her. I felt so nervous to talk to her for some reason, what if she thought I was weird and didn't enjoy talking to me? What if she heard me and decided I wasn't fun? What if we had nothing to talk about? I called her while sitting in my driver's room, she picked up quite quickly after 2 rings to be exact.

Max- Hi, Y/N! Y/N- Hey, Max!! How are you? Max- I'm good, what about you? Y/N- Yeah, I'm good too. haha!! This is so weird talking to you. Max- yeah, you sound pretty. Why would I say that? That sounds so fucking creepy, I face palmed myself so hard. Y/N- You sound nice too. I mean....you have a nice voice. Max- haha, thanks, this is the first time some one has said that. She thinks I have a nice voice, do I? Y/N- soooo, what have you been up too?? You've been so busy lately. I could hear people outside the driver's room. I quickly locked the door before answering her question. Max- yeah, I've been busy with stuff. I'll be done soon for a while now. Y/N- That's great I need my best friend back! Did she just call me her best friend? I've never had a best friend before.

We ended up talking on calls a lot more. I would have her contact ringer saved with a separate ringtone so that I would know to answer it. She usually called at reasonable times, where ever I travelled as if she knew my schedule.

2015

I got signed with RedBull Racing's junior team, making me the youngest driver. It was such a surreal feeling. But this also meant I couldn't talk to Y/N as much as I wished I could. Training and the races kept me very busy. But she was very understanding and would always welcome me back, no matter how long I was gone for.

2021

The first time I'm regretting not telling what I do to Y/N was today when I won my first World Championship. I was surrounded by my team, my girlfriend and my family as I got out of the car after I finished P1 at Abu Dhabi but it felt strange; like I was missing someone. I wish I could share this win, the biggest in my life yet, with the person who makes me feel so special yet so myself.

When I asked her about Formula One, she didn't know about, she didn't even know the prominent figures. So, I wasn't as worried about her finding out but I did worry now; since my win was controversial according to the media. However, she never asked. Was she really unaware or playing dumb? I wasn't sure if I should be grateful I get to be just Max or sad that I can't share a huge part of my life with my best friend.

2023

Y/N and I have been friends for the past 10 years. Time really flies. I've gotten a lot better at balancing my personal and work life. Y/N is my well kept secret; like I'm the only one who knows her. She moved out for college and we've only video called since. She is still funny and still writes. I think it's so cool of her to stay passionate about what she loves and keeping at it. She loves my cats more than I love them sometimes, she get's so excited when I send pictures of them. She says they cheer her up and that Jimmy and Sassy are her virtual pets. They loved her too honestly, they would always recognise when she was on call and jump into my lap or the phone to see or hear her. She still doesn't know what I did for a living; we've kept that a 'secret' you could say. But really I just didn't know how to tell her I was a Formula One driver and a 2 time World Champion.

Today was like any other day, I hadn't spoken to Y/N at all. Whenever I called her, I would usually close/lock the door depending on who was at home. My girlfriend didn't know about Y/N. I didn't even know how to bring it up, honestly. I sat down on my SimRacing chair after I switched the livestream off. Her phone rang for a few times and then stopped ringing but she didn't answer the call. I tried again thinking maybe she was busy or didn't hear it. I called a couple times before texting her; no reply. I was freaking out. This was the first time in 10 years that she hasn't answered my calls. She won't even reply to my messages. I found myself pacing around the house. The door to the room opened to my girlfriend's daughter standing in front of me, "Maxie, why are you walking in circles?" She asked after observing me for sometime. "It's nothing" I said, trying to calm myself down more than give a reply to her question. All these horrible thoughts swirled through my mind; what if she was in an accident and no one knows? What if she got robbed? What if she hurt herself and can't get help? What was I supposed to do? I didn't even know where she lived. I just couldn't think straight. My hair was a mess with how much I was running my fingers through it, a few stands coming along when I almost pulled them out of frustration.

After 7 hours, she replied to my text. I had almost given up hope, but she said that she was fine and that her phone was about to die. I felt relieved knowing that she was ok. But the text was so out of character for her. I texted her everyday after that in hope of talking to her. We always spoke everyday and it had been years since we didn't speak for so long. Almost every text was left on delivered. I had a race this weekend which I won and went out to celebrate with everyone because they wanted me to tag along. I didn't see the text Y/N sent me a while after the race since I was at the club. I only saw it when I got home. As soon as I saw it, I called her. She answered after a few rings.

Max- Schat, how have you been? Haven't heard a word from you in days. You could clearly hear the worry in my voice. Y/N- I've been busy, school year ending and stuff. Why didn't you sleep yet? Max- You know my sleep schedule is non existent. Y/N- Yeah, I guess I do. What did she mean by that? Her voice seemed hoarse, was she sick?Y/N- You know how I do freelance editing Max- You've told me about it Y/N- The latest author I'm working with is a sports author. I was hoping you could help me since you are a walking encycylopedia. Max- sure schat, but what's up with you? You know I'm always there for you Y/N- Yeah it nothing, just stressed. Max- Take off, you deserve it I wish she took care of herself instead of working so hard without breaks. Y/N- The summer break is here soon, I'll be fine. So about that author... Max-Yeah, what sport does she write for? Y/N- Formula One. I don't really like reading lengthy articles and I'm sure one article wouldn't do a sport any justice. I felt the ground slip from under my feet. My palms had gotten sweaty suddenly. Max- You did not go through google yet, right? (I stammered out) Y/N- Oh no, what do you take me for? I got excited to learn about something new. Do you know who the reigning champion is? I felt like I was about to lose everything. I didn't know what to say, my mouth was dry. No matter what I said, I don't think I could fix this situation. Y/N- Some dude named Max Verstappen. You guys share the same first name. He has 2 cats too; named Jimmy and Sassy, who look exactly like your bengals. I mean he even looks like you, with horrible sleep schedule just like you. He even sounds like you. There was horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach and my lungs felt like there was no air in them. Watching her tear up was the worst feeling.

Max- Schatje, I can explain. Y/N- You don't have to Max. I never asked you what you did. You don't have to explain anything. Max- I wanted to tell you, it just never came up in conversation. Y/N- I get it, it's difficult to tell your friend who has amounted to nothing that you are the World Driver's Champion, best of the best in Formula One. Max- Y/N, it's nothing like that. You're great, you're kind, you're funny. She laughed, but that stung my heart for the first time when her laugh was my favourite sound in the world. Y/N- Those are character traits I possess, they don't describe my career goals or achievements. I know I work 2 jobs to stay afloat while you make millions, I know I wish I was an author and not their editor, I know you probably thought I was too stupid to understand your rich and fancy world. Max- No, no, you're so talented. I've read your work and I'm sure the right publication will pick your work up. Y/N- I got rejected for the sixth time today. All of this is fine except that you lied to me about being single while having a girlfriend for years and having the happy family you dreamt off. You didn't have to introduce me to her; not like my boyfriends met you. But it would've been nice if I knew. Max- It just never came up. (I held my head in shame) Y/N- I...we joked about setting you up with someone all the time. Please don't. I get it, we didn't tell each other about work goals or what we did as a job but personal life; I literally told you about every guy I've ever been with. I felt bad telling you thinking you were single. I feel stupid right now. I wanted to reach out and wipe her tears but I couldn't. Max- I'm sorry,Y/N. I promise I won't hide anything anymore. Please, don't cry. Y/N- My name is Y/N Y/L/N. I majored in literature in Uni and now work as a primary school teacher and freelance editor. I'm trying to get my book published soon. I broke up with my boyfriend 2 months ago. This fucking hurt, everything she said and the way she said it. Max- Please don't do this. Y/N- I believe at least one of us should be honest. Max- Let me fix this. Y/N- Don't worry. There's nothing to fix. Max- Please don't say that. You mean a lot me. (I felt tears in my eyes.) Y/N- Me too. That's why, I need time. I'll talk to you when I'm ready. Max- Please, I can't lose you. I felt like my world was crashing. Y/N- You won't. I'll always be there for you. I just need time. Take care Max I was crying as she said it. Max- Bye, take care Y/N. I'll always be here. And the screen blacked out, I could see my reflection on the screen, tears streaming down my face.

After I was able to clear my head I texted her telling her that I would always be there for her and I would like to clear up the misunderstanding when she's ready. I spent the next few months thinking about her. It was starting to affect my relationship. I couldn't really give my girlfriend time when my mind was occupied with thoughts of Y/N. When my girlfriend brought it up how we were growing apart; I had a fight with her. I don't know what came over me, but not talking to Y/N or not knowing what was up with her was making it very difficult for me to focus on anything. The fighting became a constant after that. I didn't understand why she couldn't let me be. I missed my friend but she wouldn't get it.

I was SimRacing when Y/N's name popped up on my phone asking me to call her. I guess she was ready to talk it out. I really wished that this wasn't the end of our friendship. I really hoped that we could get over the misunderstanding and still be friends. I told the team I had some work and called her immediately. She answered like always; I waited for her to speak with baited breath. She started talking and we cleared everything up. I apologised for hiding the truth from her. I told her how much of a constant she was for me in my ever hectic life; how talking to her made everything better. She listened to me, I listened to her and then finally asked her to come to my home race. I wanted to meet her. I couldn't live knowing that I had the resources but didn't meet the one person that mattered to me the most. She was hesitant at first but I offered to get her the tickets and insisted on her joining me at the biggest race of the season for me and finally she agreed. I was over the moon. As soon as we ended the call, I sent her the tickets. I found myself counting down the days to the race for the first time.

I was waiting for her at the airport when she got here. My heart was beating very fast as I waited for her to come out. When I saw her; she was beautiful, shorter than I expected but she looked cute with her bag in one hand and a back pack on her shoulder, her hair in a low bun, a small smile graced her feature. I don't think I've noticed anyone with such detail ever before. Our conversation flowed easily. It didn't feel like it was the first time we were meeting. I dropped her at the hotel and went off to do media duty's at the paddock when I came back she was still asleep, traveling must've tired her out. She got dressed while I waited for her to get ready, even giving my 2 cents on what she should wear. She looked gorgeous, I couldn't help myself, staring at her. The black satin dress hugged her curves in all the right places. Her hair flowed down her back, the jewellery sparkling against her body. We went to have dinner at a fancy dutch restaurant. She loved the food especially the apple tart. The moan she let out as she devoured the dessert made blood rush downwards. I found my cheeks heating up, thankfully the whole place was dimly lit. We walked around for a while after the meal, she made fun of my name but I couldn't care less. I apologised and she accepted it and hugged me. Her arms were soft and the embrace warm. I found myself wrapping my arms around her, my face buried in her neck. I was scared I was gonna lose her, forever. I've never been scared to lose anything but a race until now and the thought of not having her in my life seemed scary. She consoled me and we headed back to the hotel.

The rest of the weekend was uneventful except for my girlfriend being pissed; she fought with about Y/N. I don't get what her problem is, she's just a friend I've known since forever. I'm just showing her around. I was giving interviews when I saw her talking to Lando, I saw them laughing along in the corner of my eye. It made me feel strange, there was this feeling in the pit of my stomach and I didn't like it. When I got back, Lando had left since it was his turn. She found Lando cute and it irked me, I was annoyed hearing her ask me to set her up with him. We got back to RedBull hospitality when my girlfriend asked me to talk to her, I left with her reluctantly leaving Y/N with Checo.

"Listen Max, I get it, she's your childhood friend and all, but it's so weird how she suddenly cropped up when I or for that matter any one knew nothing about her. People are saying stuff about us since she stepped on the paddock and the way you are dragging her along." my girlfriend spoke. "What are people saying? I will not stand any slander against her" I cut her off. She laughed dryly. "WOW, they are saying stuff about us, Max, us, that you are cheating on me with her. You've been so distant for months until a month ago, I didn't know what went wrong and you wouldn't talk either." she said running a hand through her hair. "It's nothing really. She just knows me as Max and not Max Verstappen and that's why I'm closer to her. Nothing more." I said. "It's pointless talking to you" she said turning around. "If we're done, I'm leaving, Y/N doesn't know anyone here except me." I said leaving for the door. She huffed before she followed me out. Y/N looked worried about what was going on between me and my girlfriend but I calmed her down and we spent the day together. She tagged along during quali too. I saw her praying before quali, it made my heart swell. I was starting pole and we spent the night watching a movie even though Y/N wanted me to rest before the race, I wanted to make the most of the little time we had.

Y/N hugged me before the race wishing me. I wanted to win so bad, I'd won here twice before but this was different. I wanted to win in front of her. I raced like a mad man and then I heard it. I crossed first and my happiness knew no bounds; knowing she was watching. I got out of the car and immediately ran to her; hugging her. It was cathartic. Y/N said my girlfriend looked annoyed, but I couldn't care less. I watched my girlfriend leave, annoyed. When I received the trophy at the top step of the podium knowing she was watching me from below made it so much more worth it. Y/N wanted to go out to celebrate my win and I wasn't one to say no. I went back to the hotel to get cleaned up and ready for the night.

I was greeted by my girlfriend in the room, it was dimly lit as she was sat at the corner of the bed with tears streaming down her face. "HOW COULD YOU DO THAT MAX?" she screamed at me. "Am I a fucking joke? I let it slide, you said you were friends but the first person you go to after winning your race was her, what do you think people were whispering when you did that?" she said in between sobs. I didn't get what she was saying. "Do you like her?" she asked. "What? We're friends" I stated. She shook her head, "No, Max, you aren't. The way she looks at you is how I look at you. The way you look at her" She cried, "You've never looked at me like that" she lamented. "It's nothing like that" I began. "You should've respected me at the very least and broken up with me if you liked someone else, I'm not gonna be some girl's place holder till you can have her." she cried out. "You're not a place holder for her" I said. "Feels exactly like that" she said wiping her tears. I felt nothing my 2 year long relationship might be ending and I didn't care. I didn't even try to correct her, did I really like her? Was Y/N really more important to me? "We're through Verstappen, if you can't even fight for us, I'm not about to fight for us" she sighed dejected. I walked towards the bathroom to wash up while she packed up to leave. When I got out she was gone. I went to pick Y/N up.

She kept asking me about my girlfriend but I never told her that we broke up. I didn't want her to feel responsible for my decision. At the club, she got close to everyone pretty quickly. She was unstoppable, downing one drink after another. I hadn't touched alcohol since I was driving. The others kept handing her drinks much to my dismay. She asked me to come dance with her but I had the others to look after too. She was busy dancing surrounded by too many guys, one of them going as far as to touch her and grind against her. All I saw was red, I bid the guys good bye and stormed the dance floor to drag a reluctant Y/N with me; I ended up carrying her out on my shoulder. She wasn't very happy, screaming and hitting me till I put her down. She puked as soon as I put her down and joked about missing my expensive car, I didn't really mind if she hadn't since she was more important than the car. I got her medicine and left them at her side after putting her to bed.

We spent the next few days after the race sight seeing. Y/N brought up my girlfriend a few time and I ended up avoiding her. When we were cuddling while watching Barbie I felt my heart beating out of my chest as she scooted closer to grab tissue. When her hand brushed against my skin, it burnt and a weird feeling erupted in my chest. She seemed completely unaware of how she was making me feel. We fell asleep on the couch that night.

I wasn't able to avoid the girlfriend question any longer and told her that we broke up without making any eye contact on the way to drop her to the airport. My eyes stung and there was a lump in my throat; I wasn't sure it was because of my girlfriend or Y/N. I bid her farewell, she would turn back towards me to wave after every few steps; my eyes were blurry after sometime trying to prevent the tears from falling. I ended up crying after she left.

All the races after, I ended up going shopping after or before every race to collect some trinkets or stuff that was special to that place and mailing it to her with small notes attached. She would graciously open them in front of me on video call; the smile she gave me the first time she received was unparalleled. It made my stomach turn over. I wanted to make her smile every chance I got. That's how I ended up sending her a package after every race from every country until I got reprimanded by her for the excessive amount of gifts. She asked me not to send one after every race and stick to one or two in total; I was forced to agree to that request.

We were planning on spending Christmas and New Year together; she wanted to leave after Christmas but I was able to convince her to stay until I had to leave for pre-season training. I couldn't wait for the season to end and to spend the year end with Y/N. We celebrated me winning the championship on video call; even though I had hoped she could be present in person but it wasn't possible with her schedule. This championship felt better than the last two since I was able to celebrate it with her. 2021 me wouldn't believe me right now.

Y/N flew in as soon as winter break started for her. I had cleaned up the house as much as possible. I had told my cats about Y/N visiting who seemed excited. I picked her up from the airport and when we got home the cats were very excited to meet her; a lot more receptive than the other guests I've had over. We spent the next few days going to places and the Monaco GP circuit. She cribbed about walking the entire time we walked the path. It made me laugh.

The night before Christmas we fell asleep on the couch cuddling; I hadn't slept this well in a very long time. When I woke up, Y/N was no where to be seen. I sat up waiting for her to return when she came back, she looked so cute in her jumper and shorts with her hair a mess. We opened up presents after some time. She had gotten me a Sid plushie, an ugly sweater and perfume. I got her a Formula One book with my face, a coffee mug and a pendant. I wanted to get her more stuff but I was sure she would make me return it if she saw every thing. I think the house would be over run with the amount of stuff I wanted to get her. Then she brought the matching sweater she got with me; I put it on immediately. I wanted to match with her all the time. We had a bit of back and forth on the dinner but agreed on Turkish kabab.

New Year came too quickly, which meant Y/N would be leaving soon. We went clubbing on New Year eve. She didn't drink like the last time we were at the club but made friends with some of the guys there. Having a social butterfly for a friend was a bad idea. We counted the time down to midnight as the clock struck 12 and I turned towards her to celebrate I saw she was kissing one of the guys she had befriended when we entered. If the club was quite you could hear my heart shatter. That's when I realised that all these weird feeling and all the times I couldn't stop thinking about her was because I liked her, no scratch that, I loved her. I felt my heart constrict when she turned towards me and hugged me later. I didn't want to talk about it, this would ruin our friendship.

All I could think about was how it felt to watch her kiss another man. I hated it, the worst feeling, worse than DNFing or not winning. I hated knowing another man could touch her and feel her. I wasn't even sure how to bring it up since what were we if not just friends. I put myself into training for the upcoming season but those feelings I felt when she kissed another man were still fresh in my head and I couldn't get rid of them even if I tried.

I was able to convince her to join me during her spring and summer break. We had fun, I loved having her waiting for me at the end of the race. I didn't really enjoy all the media questions that had cropped up about Y/N when she was seen with me, before or after the race. During my summer break, I spent it at her place. When I got there, it was a small apartment; but it had a homely feel. She would cook food for me and we would watch movies; I had a few commitments with the team and would leave for some time but then be back. It was so nice to have some one to come home to. When she was having her book launch, I went to meet her at her launch with a bouquet of flowers. "Congratulations" I said while handing her the flowers and giving her a hug. "Thank you" she replied, a smile playing on her lips. We had celebratory dinner after. Immediately after that, we were on the news. It read that I had a girlfriend, she kept apologising but it didn't matter. It made me a little warm, I'm not sure what emotions I felt hearing people speculate that she was my girlfriend.

I flew back to Netherland for the race early, she would only be joining me on the race day due to work. It dampened my mood but there wasn't much I could do about it. She flew in the morning of the race; it made my day watching her walk out of the airport. We talked all the way to the hotel where she got changed and we headed to the paddock. I had thought it through; after the qualifying, I had planned on telling her how I felt. I was gonna win this race and confess to her. Knowing that I can't hold her while someone else can was eating away at me and I wanted to take the chance before it slipped away from me.

I started the race P2 and finished it at P2. In the final laps, the only thoughts running through my head were, I really wanted to ask her out as a race winner, I can't do that now. She probably doesn't even like me like that, did I really want to ruin everything I had with her. I stumbled out of the car towards her, a big smile on her face. And suddenly I said it; "I wanted to ask you out as a race winner" emotions were running high. She insisted me to continue and when I did, she agreed to go out with me. I was over the moon, my head was reeling. This race ending was not what I hoped for but Y/N's answer was something I really was hoping for.

She waited for me in the driver's room. I couldn't help but not touch her. Her skin against mine send electric shocks through me, I couldn't help but smile at the feeling of her against me. I wanted to have this feeling for the rest of the life. I wanted to have her next to me; it took me a while to figure that out but now that I had, I didn't want to let go. I loved her and I wanted her.

We were both in the hotel room at the end of night in each other’s embrace, "Can't believe you're my boyfriend" she exclaimed. "Can't believe you're my girlfriend either." I exclaimed back. "I've liked you since I've known you" she mumbled. "What?" I asked shocked. "Yeah, I've always had a crush on you. Teenage me would lose it right now if she saw" she said. "I'm sorry it took me so long" I muttered pressing a kiss against her lips. "better late then never" she laughed wrapping her arms around my neck, flipping me to straddle my hips. She bent down to kiss me again.

I could spend the rest of my life like this, if it meant I could have her forever.

Hope you had fun. Thank you for enjoying the story!!

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farfromstrange · 21 days ago

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Fictober Day 19: Nightmares

Fictober Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Pairing: Matt Murdock x F!Reader

Prompt: Nightmares (🌼)

Summary: Matt has a nightmare. Again.

Warnings: Angst, mentions of death, nightmares, mentions of violence, hurt/comfort

Word Count: 1.2k

A/n: This is more of a Whumptober thing than Flufftober because it turned out angstier than planned. It still has the comfort elements though, and Matt finally gets a hug.

Read Me On AO3! (I'll be cross-posting when I have time, so you'll only be getting the Tumblr version until I can get around to it)

The bedroom is hulled in darkness. Hell’s Kitchen is never really silent, but this late at night it is a little more bearable.

Matt came home only a few hours ago, covered in cuts and bruises that almost gave you a heart attack. He makes you a light sleeper because even when he’s safe and sound in bed next to you, you’re worried about him.

Day and night—every second of every day you are in a constant state of concern. You know how he gets. He seeks out trouble for the sake of the greater good, and he would jump in front of a buttle, too, if it meant protecting the innocent. You’ve almost lost him more times than you can count, so even when he tells you he is okay, you can’t stop; you can’t stop worrying about him because he is all you have.

When the bed creaks and a soft moan breaks the tranquility in the room, your eyes flutter open. You turn to look at the man beside you, though instead of finding him peacefully asleep, Matt is drenched in sweat, chest heaving with labored breaths as he writhes in the sheets, and his cries of agony wrap an iron fist around your heart.

It happens a lot more than he likes to admit—the nightmares. When the world gets quiet and the thoughts can roam freely in his mind, trying to find something, anything, to tear him down, that is when they come. The vultures find him in his most vulnerable moments, and then they feast.

He doesn’t like talking about them because he doesn’t see his dreams. Sometimes, flashes of memories turn into a mess of unintelligible sounds, and he feels like he’s on fire. Other times, his worst fears wrap a noose around his neck as though they are reality.

He dreams of losing you. He dreams of the coppery scent of your blood, feeling it stick to his hands as your heartbeat slips through his fingers like quicksand. He dreams of his dad dying, of his friends leaving, and of the wrath of God every time he feels to save someone. When he dreams, it almost always turns into a nightmare, and you feel so fucking useless every time.

You reach out for his clammy shoulders, trying to soothe him back to sleep, but the second you touch him, he jolts awake with a shout.

Matt doesn’t know it’s you. A cloud has engulfed him, tuning out everything beyond his own erratic heartbeat. He can still hear your screams echoing in his ear. So loud. So terrified. So dead.

They got to you, grabby hands determined to take you from him. When you touch him, all he can think about are the hands of the men who took you from him or the pain that spread through his chest like wildfire when your heartbeat disappeared into the void, and they laughed.

They laughed at him. They laughed at you. Because one day, he will be the death of you.

“Matt!” you call out. “Matt, listen to me. You’re safe. It was just a dream, baby. Listen to me!”

Your voice cracks as your pleas fall on deaf ears. You know better than to touch him, but tears are spilling down his cheeks and he’s grunting, and you just can’t help yourself. You want to make it all better. You want to fix him.

The second you brush his skin again, his nervous system reacts, though not in the way you expected him to.

His arms fling out, suddenly and aimlessly, catching your wrist in a grip far tighter than he means. And it hurts. You don’t want to, but your first instinct is to wince in pain. He’s a strong, strong man.

“Matt!” you shout. “Matt, stop! I need you to wake up.”

You’re not scared of him—you know he’d never hurt you. He doesn’t know it’s you right now, and you know that. This isn’t the first time he has lunged forward. This isn’t the first time he has thrown his arms around and accidentally hurt you. But the last time he did, the guilt almost killed him. If he thinks he hurt you again, God knows what will happen, and you can’t lose him. You can’t lose the man you love just because he thinks he is a danger to you.

You love him, nightmares and all. He needs you.

You throw your free hand up, reaching for his own. “It’s me! It’s me. Feel my heartbeat,” you insist. “I’m right here.”

For a second, his body goes rigid, muscles tensed, fist raised like he’s about to strike, but then he feels the steady thud, thud, thud of your heart in your chest, a sound so unique he could make it out in a crowd of millions, and his fist falters.

He stops fighting.

You press his hand over your heart, leaving no room for escape. “That’s me,” you whisper. “I’m okay. I’m right here.”

You’re alive.

For a split second, it’s like he can’t understand. He doesn’t want to understand because how the hell can your heart be beating when you just died? How can you be alive when he felt you slipping away from him?

His brows furrow and his fingers tremble against your skin. He’s still breathing hard, but slowly, painfully slowly, he begins to come out of the fog.

For a long moment, all he does is breathe—uneven, ragged breaths. It hurts you more than anything to see him like this, disoriented and terrified because he just doesn’t understand.

His head dips forward against your collarbone. You feel him clutch at you, hands grasping your shirt as if he’s afraid that if he lets go, you’ll disappear again.

“I’m sorry…” His voice is barely above a whisper. “I’m so sorry.”

“Shhh.” You have to try hard not to cry. “It’s okay.”

“I hurt you. I–”

“No,” you cut him off. “You were just looking for me. I’m okay, I promise.”

A sob tears through him.

“You’re okay. Come here. Listen.” You guide his head to your chest, resting his ear right above your heart where his hand remains, unable to move.

“Listen,” you repeat.

Matt’s eyes flutter. A singular tear travels from his lash line down his reddened cheek, staining the front of your shirt. You smell like him, but you feel like yourself.

“My heart is beating. I’m alive. I’m okay. It was just a bad dream. None of it was real or is ever going to become real,” you say.

He shudders. What if it does become real? What if he does lose you and all of this is just a cruel form of foreshadowing God put in his path?

Good Lord, he can’t think about that.

Your heart continues to dance to its most familiar rhythm, and he focuses on that. He focuses on you and the way you’re holding him or he’s sure he might lose his mind. Tonight was a bad one—a really bad one.

He’s not sure if he feels more guilty for waking you after disturbing your sleep once before, or that your wrist seems to be pulsating from the force he put around it. He didn’t mean to, but he hurt you.

You’re alive, he keeps telling himself. It was just a dream.

But he hurt you.

You cradle him against you. “Stop,” you say as if you can read his mind. “It’s not your fault.”

The guilt is too much for one man to carry, that much is true, but when he’s in your arms like this, it gets a little easier. Just for a little while, it gets easier.

He doesn’t have to carry it alone. He doesn’t have to fight the demons alone. He is not alone.

No matter what Matt Murdock does, you have vowed a long time ago not to give up on him. So, you stay, and you will continue to stay until you both die. And that, you hope, is a day still far, far in the future.

@ebathory997 @the-b33skn33s @scoliobean @drmeghanjones @lanae111 @gpenguin666 @linamarr @itwasthereaminuteago @norestfortheshelbywicked @yarrystyleeza @littlenerdyravenclaw @etanordoesbullsh1t @thychuvaluswife @harleycao @schneeflocky @imjustcal @pipsqueakkitten @merlinbtch @sya-skies @thatonegamefish @amberritonicole @pigeonmama @bohemianrhapsody86 @a-gir1-has-n0-name @winkev1 @callsign-ember @chittaphonstar @buckyyyismahhlife @trublu2u @xnatyx @zomtart @ethereal-blaze @littleagxs @ravenclaw617 @lucienofthelakes @steve-chandler

#matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x fem!reader #matt murdock #matt murdock fluff #matt murdock angst #daredevil #daredevil x reader #lizzi's fictober 2024 #charlie cox

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peacheeeliz · 25 days ago

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029. am i stupid (wc: 640)

The library was eerily quiet, with the distant commotion of the Valentine's Day Dance keeping the place a bit more lively. Mark sat in his seat at the study room table, head buried in his palms as he took in his last conversation with his now ex-girlfriend. He should feel sad. He should look back on those texts with sorrow; but he can't. No matter how hard he tries, he can't. He doesn't know what he feels. Happy? Shame? Content?

The study room door creaks open, and Mark's eyes rise from his hands to look behind him. They're met with your figure standing in the doorway, a concerned look washing over your face as you stared back at him. Despite that, a smile plays at your lips as you walk to join him at the table.

“I'm pretty sure you're missing out on a pretty sick party back there,” you tease, taking your seat beside him. “Ok, maybe not that sick. But you know what I mean.”

Mark lets out a soft laugh, “yeah, definitely not that sick.”

You laugh with him for a moment, but then you remember why you were out looking for the man. “Everything alright? You left in a bit of a hurry,” you start, eyes avoiding his. “I was a little worried, is all.”

His eyes soften, and the smile on his face falls, watching you look anywhere but him. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you or anything,” he tells you, reaching out to take your hand in his. He gently rubs his thumb across your skin, “I just needed some air is all.”

He pauses for a moment, taking in a deep breath. “Karina broke up with me, and I guess I just needed to take a break from the dance,” he explains, nodding slowly. “She, uh, started talking to another guy and ended up losing feelings for me. So, she broke it off.”

“Mark, I'm so sorry,” you say as you finally turn to look at him. Your heart races at the soft touch of his fingers grazing against your skin, and despite your words, your stomach flutters at the information he shares.

“I should feel heartbroken, right?” He questions, staring at you with soft eyes. “But, I don't. I guess you kinda know why, but I guess I'm more… glad? Than anything else. It saves for a messier break-up.”

A blush spreads across your cheeks at his gaze, so you turn away again. You take a deep breath, “maybe… you should just stay single for a bit.” Your suggestion takes him by surprise. “I mean, it's probably the healthiest solution.”

After a moment, he draws back away from you and pulls his hand into his lap, clearing his throat. “Yeah, yeah, you're right,” he sighs, but sends you a reassuring smile. “I should just stay single.”

A silence falls between the two of you, and the party just a few buildings away comes back into earshot. Mark wanted nothing more than to bring you back to that party – to bring you back as his date. But his head reels with your words, “you should just stay single for a bit.” He can't think of anything else but you. He was just so content with his break-up. Why now is he feeling heartbroken?

“We should probably return to the party. They're probably worried about us, ” you start suddenly, standing up quickly. “Uhm, I'll meet you back there, ok?”

Mark can only nod as you make your way out of the study room, slouching back in his chair as you disappear from his view. His heart is pounding right out of his chest, his mind replaying your words over and over again, and his head falls into his palms again.

Why must he be haunted by his inability to get over you?

synopsis ⤏ mark, desperate to talk to the cute girl in his japanese class, forms a study group. who knew that other struggling college students might want to join a study group?

a/n: double update since i ended up posting so late 😮‍💨 when i said slowburn, i meant SLOWBURN

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#kpop #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop smau #kpop social media au #kpop fanfic #nct #nct social media au #nct imagines #nct smau #nct scenarios #mark lee #mark lee au #mark lee fanfic #mark lee imagines #mark lee scenarios

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shirefantasies · 2 months ago

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Coming Out to Thorin's Company as a Lesbian (F!Reader)

This was definitely not inspired by anything of late, no... 😅👉🏻👈🏻 Thought this would be a perfect Sapphic September kickoff 💃🏻

Warnings: angst in some (all happy by the end though!), minor suggestive joking

Balin

"Balin?" The sound of your voice, unexpectedly timid, had the older dwarf swiveling on his heel, tails of his maroon coat fluttering a bit about his boots. "What's that, lass?" "May I speak to you?" "Of course," he answered, spreading his hands. A tentative smile crept onto your face. "What was on your mind?" He prompted as you settled in at his side, scooting as close as you could to the warm folds of his layers. "Well, it's just that the others... I think they are trying to marry me into their families." Balin shook his head at that, a hint of amusement glinting in his deep brown eyes, though no dismissal of your situation colored the way he looked at you. "None of these old fools' little brother is the sort of husband you had in mind, I trust?" With a deep draw of breath, you straightened in your seated position. "Moreso that I am not cut out for that life! That I can never see myself as wife to a husband, rather..." "Wife to a wife?" Balin supplied, bushy eyebrows raised. Lighting up like a bonfire, you nodded, gazing into the dwarf's eyes as new. "You understand!" "'course I do. You're hardly the first I've met of your sort. Now I'll not say a word to the others. Unless you want me to give them a stern talking-to, of course." "That would be great," you giggled, leaning even closer into the musky red about the secure form at your side to take Balin's arm in yours, "Just like a father. That is why I trusted you first." "Like a father," Balin repeated in a voice barely above a whisper, lips faintly smiling and tears glistening in his eyes.

Dwalin

“Look at the two of them- stone-faced as ever.” “Quite a nice couple, don’t you think?” “Oh, certainly. They’ll shut down everyone’s fun together!” Neither you nor the warrior at your side particularly appreciated the less savory stories being swapped that night, at least in Dwalin’s words “in front of Ori. He hasn’t gotten it yet, no need to scare ‘im.” That combined with the fact you both wielded axes apparently meant you were destined to wed and raise five beautiful axe-swinging maniacs. “You’ll be the one getting shut down if you don’t cut it out,” Dwalin shot back. Smirking, you internally vowed to do him one better. “As if we’d ever be together,” you added with a snort, “Maybe if he had a sister.” “Ah.” The princes glanced between you two, then themselves. “Well, why didn’t you say so?” Kili asked. “We’ll try to fix you with Gloin’s sister-in-law instead!” “Anyone would be better ‘n you two!” The older dwarf bellowed in response, casting peals of laughter over the fireside.

Thorin

“You remove yourself from us.” “You should talk,” you shot back, glancing up to meet the king’s eyes. At that, Thorin gave a conceding smirk and the faintest nod, settling at your side and bristling a bit less beneath his imposing furs. “I have little to say to that,” he admitted, “Save that much echoes in my mind.” “Indeed,” you agreed, folding your arms tighter across your chest, “Though certainly my troubles way less heavily than yours. I heard what you went through.” With a brief nod, Thorin encouraged you onward. “The first time I had feelings for another girl, well…opening up about that lost me some people. Important people. I felt like all I could do was hurt. Myself, others. Only pain seemed to follow in my wake.” “Standing strong for ourselves takes great courage,” Thorin told you, “But every time we rise, we have more to draw from. Many a time we are the only ones we have. Let that fuel the fire I see within you.” He rested a hand on your shoulder, giving a tentative smile that you returned, this time with a nod of your own. Silence and solidarity overtook you as you stood side by side and reflected, no longer alone.

Oin

“Did I hear that correctly?” Twisting that steel trumpet in his ear in a manner your brain could only perceive as painful, Oin’s gaze slid up to fix yours. Expression falling, you exhaled quickly. “Yes. But please forget it.” Tone rushed, you made to walk away, taking one long booted stride before a hand caught your shoulder. “You misunderstand me!” Oin told you. “‘S not like I can’t imagine why!” Chuckling, he loosened his grip as the muscles across your chest and shoulders relaxed. “Nothing wrong with that. I’m just surprised you chose me first,” he told you, this time much more softly, “But thank you. Anything I can help you with, you need only ask, eh?”

Gloin

“You’re quite good with that thing, you know!” Wiping some sweat from your forehead, you grinned at Gloin, whose axe you’d just parried with your spear. He nodded to the betrothal bead you wore. “No wonder you’ve snagged yourself a dwarf for a husband!” Face immediately fallen, you averted your gaze, unable to face his look of pride anymore. “What’s wrong? What did I say?” “You may not be so proud of me,” you answered, heart thudding in your chest. “Why ever not?” Lowering his weapon, Gloin closed the space between you with a warm, concerned hand upon your shoulder. “I have no husband,” you answered, “But a wife.” “Why wouldn’t I be proud of you?” The older dwarf asked at that, tone incredulous. “You still snagged yourself a dwarf, didn’t ya? I bet she’s almost as beautiful as mine! Don’t you worry none, lassie, just show me a portrait if you carry one!” Moved, you sniffled, placing your hand over his. “Thank you, Gloin. You’ve been like a father this trip.” Turning away, the dwarf took his turn to sniff at that, suddenly claiming a bout of allergies.

Bifur

“Bifur,” you signed, “You know that you have been very dear to me. Like the uncle I always wanted.” Smiling, the older dwarf fixed you with a look of interest. “I hope you still see me the same when I ask you for this help.” “Help? Help how?” He signed back, leaning forward. “How best to tell the others I like women.” “Are they trying to marry you?” He jokingly signed back, smiling and chuckling. “Not that I’d let them,” you teased, “But I think some of the older ones are trying to get me with their relatives. You and your cousins have really taken me under your wings. I feel safe with you.” You saw Bifur’s body relax, his thick brows softening in their angle. “Of course I will help you. I have an idea! And we can find each other wives!” With a great heh heh heh, he guffawed, bringing you out into a burst of laughter.

Bofur

“Well, you would understand. You’re half dwarf, aren’t you, lass?” “Me?” You asked, an indicating hand upon your chest and a look of confusion upon your face. “I don’t even look like a dwarf! Any particular reason you think that?” “That was your sister you lived with in the Blue Mountains, right? Or your half-sister and whatnot?” “Bofur,” you laughed, “That was not my sister! That was my wife! I am no half-dwarf, simply married to one.” “You’re married…to a dwarrowdam?” “I know,” you cut him off, turning away. You’d heard plenty. The shock, the invasive questions, the curses, even, and hearing it from one so sweet as Bofur would rend your heart beyond repair. Better not to look at him. “What an honor!” His chuckle of amazement turned you back around to look upon his smiling face. “Dwarrowdams don’t just choose anyone, you know. Why do you think I have no wife yet? What’s the secret? You must know, eh?” Your heart glowed at the sight of his warm hazel eyes, the way he teasingly elbowed you.

Bombur

“Yer sighin’ again. Something on your mind, dearie?” Given the nature of your exhale, you felt a pang of reluctance, but Bombur’s eyes shone so sincere and you’d seen how well he cared for others firsthand. Giving you his extra blanket, drawing your coat tighter, picking the bits you didn’t like out of the stew he ladled you. Holding you back with an arm across you as a goblin charged. You inhaled that time, breathing in a moment of comfort as your muscles relaxed, fire crackling at your back. “I suppose there is. I worry.” “About?” “About what the others would think of me if they knew. If they knew, well… that I fancy women.” Bombur’s hazel eyes widened, glittered. “Ye do?” “Yes,” you answered, nodding. “Why, that’s great!” The fiery-haired dwarf lit up, grinning. “My oldest daughter would be perfect for you! I’d been wishing I could make a real daughter of you, after all, and here comes this blessing from Mahal! …well, I s’pose, if you like her of course, guess I’m getting ahead of myself…” The embrace you yanked sweet Bombur into cut off his words, tears glinting in both your fluttering eyes.

Dori

“The others don’t understand my appreciation for nice things,” Dori remarked over the tea you shared and the fine piece of jewelry you marveled over, a delicate brooch with intricate filigree and pale blue gems, “Feels like it’s all ale and dams with them.” “And what’s wrong with dams?” You joked into your cup without thinking. “Then again, most people don’t understand my appreciation for them either.” Dori’s eyebrows shot up, but before you could brace for his concerned chastising all he did was chuckle. “I understand that one. I myself have never minded who I make my home with. Beauty exists in every form and there is no point denying that. If you find that in a lady, stick with it. No one will ever please everyone, so you’d best please yourself, my dear.”

Nori

The weight on your heart tugged down like a thick pendant as silence descended, fifteen pairs of eyes upon you. You made to turn away, gaze turning downward, right as the figure rose from his seat. Nori. “I fancy a lass or two myself!” He chimed in, wide hands upon his hips. A smile rose to his lips as his eyes met yours; his head even faintly, almost imperceptibly, nodded. Somehow of them all you hadn’t expected Nori’s support, but as soon as he’d spoken raucous laughter and teasing erupted as hands clapped the pointy-haired dwarf’s back and a few hit yours, asking your type and fighting over who had the better barmaid off somewhere for you.

Ori

“You’ve been married this whole time?” Ori gaped at you, childlike awe evident in those big brown eyes of his. “I have,” you answered with a shy smile. “Please describe him to me! I’ll make you a portrait while you’re apart.” Him. Ori’s smile, his almost pleading look, was so earnest, though, that you found yourself giving in and describing first the shape of a face, the way hair falls. “Her eyes are-” “Her?” “Yes,” you admitted quietly. “It’s a wife? You can- Oh, why didn’t you tell me! I’ve got the features all wrong for that.” Scribbling away, Ori glanced back up at you. “So you married another woman! How did you meet? How did you know you loved her? I think you two would look beautiful together. You’re both pretty.”

Fili

“Are- are you alright?” Innocent and softly-spoken as they are, the words all but jump you out of your skin, whirling you around with far more guilt than was warranted. Just as everything these days. Fili’s eyes droop a bit at the sheer agony he sees on your face. “No, you aren’t, are you? You can talk to me. You know that.” Tears threaten your eyes at that despite your smile. “What would you do,” you ask him, your own words quiet, “If some of the people you kept closest would not accept you? All because they think your love is wrong?” Softening his gaze further, the dwarven prince steps closer, opening his arms to you. “I would hold those who do that much closer,” he answers. The outer leather of Fili’s layers rubs with the gentlest friction against your cheek as your head falls down to his shoulder, your arms curling around his sturdy form. His own hold the small of your back, rubbing small circles. “No love is wrong,” he whispers, “And the one who earns your love is a lucky woman indeed.”

Kili

"Alright, you caught me." "What do you mean?" Brow furrowing, you glanced back toward Kili, who made no effort to lower the folds of the tunic he'd begun raising over his head. When your eyes met his, he gave you a wink. "I think you know. 's all right. I've been thinking about it, too." You hadn't even realized it was possible for your forehead to wrinkle any harder until it involuntarily did. "Wait, do not tell me you think that I came here to gawk at you." The dwarf prince smiled at you, expression still impish. "I think we could settle on the term 'appreciating'. After all, it's not like I've never appreciated you." "You wish," you interrupted, finally breaking into a smirk of your own, "Kili, you git, I like women. I only came back this way because I left my coat." "Oh." He finally loosened his grip, dropping the fabric back over his toned chest. His grin fell back down and his eyebrows shot up. "Oh. Forget I-" "It's forgotten." "We don't have to-" "Of course we don't." "How about that harpist back at Rivendell?" "Gorgeous. Although visiting Bilbo's people I met this one hobbit and she's the one I really haven't stopped thinking of..."

Bilbo

“Bilbo, you know I…I have no interest in men.” The hobbit had been teasing you about the way one of his neighbors looked upon you, his expression softening at your words. “I see. Women, then?” At that, you simply gave a nod. “D-don’t worry,” he held up his hands defensively, “I understand. I don’t much have interest in anyone, really. Well, like that. Unless I get to know them, then maybe…. But anyway, I’ve never put much stock into men or women or… the things they do. Much more important things in life, hm?” Humming in response, you nodded and smiled, giving his shoulder an affectionate squeeze. “Like gold and mountains and adventures, right?” “Or a good cup of tea. Crumpets? Oh heavens, I’d love a crumpet right now.” “Me too, Bilbo, me too.”

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justatalkingface · 4 months ago

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PSA: Speedrunning a story is BAD, or Speedrun Manga Hell.

I know, to the people who lurk in my home of MHA crit and BNHA crit, this isn't exactly news, but I want to practice posting more. So why not?

To sum it up in one snappy line? Spending time on a plot point is the difference between it being a story, and it being an outline.

At least in my mind, an outline is as much a series of messages to yourself than it is an actual story, one or two lines representing a larger concept you, the author, understand, placed to remind you that 'this is where that goes'. Fundamentally, it's not meant for the readers to look at, it's for the author use to help write.

Much like a flower needs water to grow, for an idea to bloom into it's full potential it needs time.

Time spent establishing it's existence in the story.

Time spent discussing or explaining the idea.

Time spent watching it play out in real time.

Time spent watching people react to it after the fact.

And though it was (as I've been going into) a deeply flawed story before that point, the War Arc is where MHA changed, turning from a story into more of a well illustrated outline. This was the moment that even the people who weren't paying a lot of attention to the plot started to notice, 'Hey, the story seems to be worse lately?'

Ever since that point, save only his most favored of topics (Endeavor, Bakugou, and Shigaraki's ever growing collection of fingers) Hori began rushing the story more and more, and there's no better example of this than the main character, Izuku 'I'm literally Hori's puppet' Midoryia.

Seriously, pick out a post War Arc part of the story, and I'll give you a list of points where Izuku isn't given the time any character with a real role in the story deserves, much less the actual main character.

Some universal topics, though, generally include:

What does Izuku think of: (insert plot point here)?

How are people in Class 1A responding to: (insert Izuku related plot point here)?

Often leading to the follow up question of: When is the last time Izuku talked to Class 1A, and not Bakugou (or to a lesser extent Shoto or Ochaku), how long was that interaction, and deep was that actual conversation?

What does Izuku feel when: (insert Bakugou's most recent/relevent insult/actual assault on his person)?

How much has time has Izuku spent mastering his latest abilities recently, not counting when he's in active combat while using them?

When is the last time the Vestiges have shown up as anything other than, 'background images that brood dramatically in the direction of Shigaraki and/or AFO'?

Why do all of these answers fail to satisfy you?

All of that, all of the spiraling issues that come from just those questions... and that's just (just!) the 'main character'. Think about how many characters are in the story at this point, think about how many plot points Hori has been (failing) to juggle. Even if they deserve less attention that Izuku... all of time needed is. Well. A Lot.

Off the top of your head... how much of that needed time was actually happened? For anything in this story?

*gestures broadly*

Exactly. Welcome to Speedrun Manga Hell. Welcome to The Illustrated Outline.

#bnha critical #mha critical #writing criticism #the difference between a story and an outline #the illustrated outline #welcome to speedrun manga hell #everything changed when the war arc attacked #izuku deserves better

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silverynight · 2 months ago

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The boy with red eyes

It's been a month since he's been training in the butterfly estate as a kakushi, and he's finally been given his uniform. Tanjirou is really happy!

He has lost count of how many letters he has sent to his family since he left home, but there's been a lot of them. After that slayer saved him and his family from a demon, Tanjirou thought about becoming a slayer as a way to help the Corps and send his family even more money than he ever did as a charcoal seller.

In his mind, it was a perfect plan. However, Nezuko and his mother begged him not to do anything that risky because they wanted to see him again at some point.

Tanjirou has never been good at denying them things, so he agreed, but since he was determined to help the slayers in some way, he found out about the kakushi and decided to become one instead.

"Isn't that risky too?" Nezuko had sent him a full letter telling him all her concerns about the matter and pointing out how much his siblings, especially Rokuta, missed him.

Taking a moment to think about them, Tanjirou closed his eyes right before he explained the situation in his next letter. Of course, everything has risks, but being a kakushi usually meant arriving at the place after the battle and helping the injured slayers as much as he could.

He is sure none of them are entirely happy with his new job, but Tanjirou is determined to help. One of the slayers, Murata, saved them from a demon after all.

With an excited smile on his face, he puts his new uniform on and remembers that Aoi said he could leave the butterfly estate now.

It's been an interesting month of learning about wounds and poisoning, also different kinds of blood demon art and how to deal with them. A huge part of being a kakushi is knowing how to move without being seen and not making too much noise, so he's been practicing that too, with the help of other kakushi.

Since Aoi says he's really good with patients, they immediately send him to the Mugen Train or what is left of it.

That's where Tanjirou meets one of the nine hashira. Weirdly enough, he hasn't seen Kocho yet, even though she's the one who basically lives in the butterfly estate; Aoi says she's been really busy lately.

***

As the crows around explain the situation to the group of kakushi, Tanjirou can't help but feel a wave of gratitude and admiration for the flame hashira.

He, along with a few of his fellow kakushi, kneel next to Rengoku. His crow assured them he's still alive, but barely; the worst part of his injuries are the missing eye and an open wound in his abdomen.

Tanjirou refuses to give up so he starts working; obviously, the Pillar needs to get to the butterfly estate immediately, but first, he needs to make sure Rengoku doesn't die on the way.

At some point, while Tanjirou keeps cleaning and patching him up, praying to the gods for his spirit, praying to them to keep him in this realm, Rengoku opens his eyes.

Tanjirou takes it as a good sign.

"Stay with me, Rengoku-san!"

At first, it seems like he's not paying attention, or perhaps he's not completely conscious, but then the flame hashira manages to move one of his hands and touch Tanjirou's right cheek or at least the mask that's covering his right cheek.

"But she's waiting for me." He argues, although he smiles softly at Tanjirou.

He has no idea whom he's talking about, but if he's seeing the spirit of a loved one already, that's not a good sign.

"Maybe she could spare you for a while longer?" Tanjirou tries. He's done with the hashira's abdomen and his eye, but his fingertips are cold.

"I think she likes you," Rengoku comments, looking happier.

Tanjirou hopes that means he's fighting to stay alive, but just in case he adds: "Would you stay with us then?"

"I'll stay with you."

***

The next Pillar he meets is Kocho herself; Aoi is struggling trying to get her to sit and let her patch a wound on her arm.

"I can take care of it myself... later. I have a couple of things to do."

Tanjirou knows he shouldn't interfere, but he worries too much about the people around him not to try at least.

"We care about you too," he says then, prompting the two girls to look back at him. "You have done a lot for us that perhaps trying to patch you up is not because we think you can't handle it yourself, but it's a way to show we appreciate you."

Kocho remains speechless for a while before smiling softly at him, for the first time, Tanjirou doesn't smell any irritation in her.

"You're just like her," she mumbles, finally sitting down, offering Tanjirou her injured arm. He immediately starts cleaning the wound. "Like my sister. She had a beautiful heart, just like you."

"I bet she was amazing," Tanjirou says, noticing that Aoi is still looking at him in shock.

"She was."

Tanjirou doesn't ask what happened to her because he can tell talking about her sister still hurts Kocho, but he can guess.

"All done!"

"I like your voice," she smiles again, before leaving Tanjirou and a very surprised and confused Aoi behind. "I have work to do. Have a nice day."

***

The red light district is almost completely destroyed; Tanjirou knows he must focus on the slayers who took care of the upper moon, but he can't help but make sure the civilians on his way are alright too.

After making sure the blond one and the slayer with the boar head are fine, Tanjirou approaches a group of kakushi who are trying to convince a hashira to stay still and let them check on his wounds.

There are three women with him that, according to another kakushi, are his wives.

Tanjirou notices the sound hashira already has bandages on his face and arm, which means that his wives took care of those.

"Are you hurt?" He turns towards the women first. "Do you want me to check on you?"

"Tengen-sama, look at his eyes," one of them squeaks in delight; she's the only one who has her hair down.

"Very flamboyant of you," Uzui comments, smiling at Tanjirou. "They look like gemstones."

"Thank y-you..." The next thing he knows is that his wives are introducing themselves and Uzui agrees to have Tanjirou to check on his wounds.

Everything seems to be fine, Makio, Suma and Hinatsuru are alright too, so Tanjirou feels a lot better.

The Pillars are definitely stronger than the other slayers because not only Uzui is still conscious, he can also move.

"I only let my wives touch me like that," the hashira grins as Tanjirou grabs Uzui's face gently and tilts his head to the side to make sure his eye is not bleeding again. His wives start giggling at that.

Tanjirou thinks he's trying to tell him not to touch him anymore, although he doesn't smell upset, so he takes a few steps back from them.

"We're heading back to my estate, why don't you come with us, pretty eyes?"

"He needs to report back to the butterfly mansion," a kakushi girl tells the sound hashira; she smells a little bit irritated. Tanjirou is not sure why.

"She's right," he says as Suma and Makio narrow their eyes at the kakushi girl.

"Well, I really hope you can pay us a visit soon anyway," Uzui smirks. "You'll always be welcome there."

"Thank you!" Tanjirou says sincerely. "I'll try to go there soon!"

***

Not all encounters with the Pillars are entirely pleasant.

Even though Tanjirou's life is dedicated to taking care of injured patients, he has to headbutt the wind hashira because he's pushing another kakushi away and hurting them in the process.

Tanjirou gets angry.

"What's your problem?" He hisses when the hashira is on the ground. "They're trying to help you! It's okay if you don't want them to touch you, but at least tell them instead of pushing them!"

Tanjirou helps two kakushi boys and a girl up while the others start shaking. He kind of expects the Pillar to attack him, but nothing happens.

There's only silence.

Shinazugawa is sitting on the ground, looking up at him with surprise and curiosity; he's no longer angry.

Suddenly feeling sorry, mostly because the Pillar has a red mark on his forehead and his chest keeps bleeding, Tanjirou decides to try again.

"Would you let me patch you up now?"

Shinazugawa nods, still staring at Tanjirou's eyes.

"Alright, please don't move."

For some reason, his fellow kakushi find it fascinating. Although, Tanjirou is the only one who takes care of the hashira because none of them want to approach him.

***

It seems Iguro doesn't like to be touched, but he allows Tanjirou to get closer because the boy asks for his serpent first.

"Are you alright?"

"I told you I'm fine already!" The Pillar hisses only to look confused when Tanjirou shakes his head.

"I'm talking to Kaburamaru."

"How do you know his name?"

"He told me. He's also worried about the bruise on your shoulder."

"Can you understand him?"

"Of course!" Tanjirou says, he knows the Pillar can't see his smile, but at least he hopes he can hear it in his voice. "He's very polite and kind!"

It seems like Iguro changes his mind about him after that, but he still doesn't let other kakushi touch him so Tanjirou has to work alone.

***

Tanjirou tries not to tear up when he reaches the swordsmith village; a lot of people died the night of the attack, but the two Pillars there did their best to keep the rest of the people safe.

Tanjirou is so proud of them.

He decides to help the kakushi who are trying to check on Tokito first, mostly because the mist hashira is one of the stubborn ones.

"I told you I feel better now," he whispers, slapping a hand away.

He either talks that low or he's feeling weak. Tanjirou gets closer and despite knowing he'll get his hand pushed away too, he tries to touch Tokito's forehead.

However, the Pillar doesn't do that. Instead he keeps looking directly into Tanjirou's eyes.

"You have a fever. If you don't have any major injuries, then let me give you something for that first."

"Your eyes. They remind me of someone..." He shivers, but gets closer to Tanjirou and smiles at him. "I like you."

"You were very brave," Tanjirou says and notices that the Pillar's crow looks ridiculously proud. "Thanks for saving the village."

Tokito's smile becomes wider and his face turns slightly pink. Tanjirou worries even more and asks one of the other kakushi around to bring him medicine.

"I tried my best too!" Suddenly, the love hashira is a lot closer, but at least it seems that she has already been patched up.

"They told me you were amazing!" Tanjirou nods, prompting her to squeak in delight. She turns red too, but the other kakushi said she didn't have a fever...

Must be something else. Maybe she's just tired.

"Oh, you're the kakushi with the red eyes!" Kanroji says, leaning forward. "Obanai has told me a lot of things about you!"

Then she tells him about the day he met him and when he gave her the stockings because she had mentioned that she felt shy wearing a skirt that short.

Tanjirou is glad that he has a good relationship with the serpent hashira now because he sounds like a very nice person, albeit with a sharp exterior.

At some point, Tokito complains he's not paying attention to him so Tanjirou has to give him a hug while the other kakushi bring a couple of stretchers for the injured ones.

Both Pillars end up falling asleep with their heads on Tanjirou's shoulders.

***

"Here. Take this," Aoi sighs, packing food for him and the Pillar he's about to visit.

The kakushi are not supposed to go to other Pillars' estates unless there's an emergency, but Aoi has told Tanjirou that Oyakata-sama is very impressed with the way he handles the hashira when they need it the most.

So Tanjirou has to go to the water estate, bring Tomioka food and perhaps convince him to rest for a while since Aoi told him he has two broken ribs.

When he knocks at the entrance, nobody responds, but Ubuyashiki was very insistent in the letter he sent Tanjirou, and he mentioned that he should do anything to talk to Tomioka.

So Tanjirou walks in without being invited. The Pillar gets surprised when he notices him there but doesn't say anything yet.

Then Tanjirou places the food in front of him.

"This is for you from Aoi," he says. "She also wanted me to check on your ribs, Tomioka-san."

"I'm fine," the water hashira retorts, but he doesn't ask Tanjirou to leave; instead he stares at his eyes. "You don't need to do anything."

"But I'd like to..." Tanjirou insists. "I know what you do for all of us and I'd like to show my appreciation in some way."

"Why?"

"Because a slayer from the Corps, one of you, saved my family a long time ago, and I'm still grateful for that. They mean a lot to me."

Tomioka keeps staring into his eyes while listening to Tanjirou's words, for a moment he thinks the Pillar is about to tear up, but he nods instead. Something changes in his demeanor.

"You can... see," he whispers, looking suddenly shy. Perhaps he doesn't like physical contact that much and that's why he often refuses help from the kakushi.

"I'll try to be quick," Tanjirou promises.

He helps the Pillar take his haori and the uniform's jacket off. Tomioka looks away and blushes when Tanjirou touches his ribs gently, barely using his fingertips. He notices bruises that haven't been properly healed and by the way Tomioka flinches in pain, Tanjirou is sure he hasn't rested enough.

"What?" Tomioka asks, slightly amused. "Even under the mask, I can tell you're pouting at me."

"You need to rest," Tanjirou huffs, feeling irritated. "You won't get any better like this! Come on, let's go to bed!"

"But..."

Tanjirou knows how to deal with stubborn patients, so he manages to get Tomioka to say in bed for a whole day while Tanjirou serves him food and makes tea for him.

"Please take care of yourself better, Tomioka-san!"

At least he promises to try before Tanjirou leaves again.

***

Himejima is really kind; the other kakushi are intimidated by his size, but Tanjirou doesn't mind. He always asks before he's about to touch the stone hashira so he gives his approval.

"It's fine. You don't need to be that careful," he sounds amused. "I can tell when you're approaching me because you're very loud."

"Oh," Tanjirou mumbles, disappointed. "Maybe I'm not that good at being a kakushi after all, we're supposed to be good at hiding and not making any noise at all."

"I don't think you're bad at your job," Himejima assures him immediately with a gentle smile. "I can hear you well because I'm used to rely on my other senses a lot. It's because of my training."

Tanjirou feels a bit better; he keeps cleaning the wound on Himejima's huge arm before covering it with bandages.

"You have a beautiful voice. Very sincere," he says after a while, touching Tanjirou's hand. "What color are your eyes?"

Tanjirou is not used to describing himself a lot. He feels slightly flustered.

"Uhh..."

"Red. But it's not exactly a warm red; they're deep red with pink hues that are more noticeable when the sunlight touches his face."

Tanjirou looks in surprise at the kakushi girl helping him with the bandages. He didn't expect her to answer for him. She chuckles.

"Sounds beautiful," Himejima says. He turns a bit towards the girl. "Thanks for describing them to me."

"You're welcome, Himejima-san."

After that, the other kakushi relax a bit around the stone hashira.

***

Every once in a while, Aoi is called to the hashira headquarters to give her report to Ubuyashiki and his wife about how everything's going in the butterfly estate and give her opinion on the kakushi performance of the month.

They usually call her at the end of a hashira meeting so she gets to see all of them every now and then; she still can't believe how Tanjirou can say those people are kind and nice because right now they look like the most intimidating people she has ever seen.

She always knew Tanjirou was a weird boy, but not exactly in a negative way; he's just too sweet for his own good.

Aoi gets to know the kakushi before they become one because they usually train in the butterfly estate. Tanjirou was even easier to remember since he was constantly volunteering to help her too.

He also talks to her a lot, mostly about his family and the slayers and hashira he meets while doing his job. He's probably the only one who has met them all.

"Excuse me, Oyakata-sama," the mist hashira asks before Ubuyashiki has the opportunity to dismiss them. "I'd like to say something, if you don't mind."

"Of course, Muichiro," Ubuyashiki says as Shinazugawa glares at Tokito; he's probably bored now that they don't have anything important to discuss.

"When I was in the swordsmith village, I met a kakushi boy," he begins with a smile so sincere it's like for a moment, he's another person entirely. "He was sweet and took care of me really well... his voice was kind; I could easily tell whenever he was smiling because he carries his emotions in his voice and his eyes. I have never seen anyone look at me with so much genuine kindness in a long time."

Aoi knows he's talking about Tanjirou. There's no one else like that.

"Our boy!" Kanroji sighs dreamily. "He was so sweet, I wanted to squeeze him! But I was very tired then, although he gave me a hug when I asked him!"

"So you finally met him, Mitsuri!" Iguro leans closer to her. "I told you he was different! I miss... I mean, Kaburamaru misses him; he was very nice to him when he took care of my wounds."

"I met him too!" Rengoku says then, grinning from ear to ear. There's an enamored expression on his face already. "I think he was the only reason I survived at all. I was ready to cross to the other side, but his sweet eyes pulled me back!"

"Ha! Don't let him fool you!" Shinazugawa smirks. "He seems sweet, but he can get mad too, and his anger is quite fun to watch!"

Aoi heard about the headbutting incident, but the worrying thing is that the wind hashira looks happy about it.

Tomioka stares fondly into the ceiling, almost like he's lost in his own memories.

"He got irritated at me for not taking care of myself." He sighs. "Muichiro is right, you can tell a lot by listening to his voice, even though his face is almost completely covered. He cares deeply about other people."

"It's true," Himejima nods. "His heart is pure. He was very careful with me even though I told him there was no need for it. We talked about his family before he left; I wish he had stayed longer at my estate."

"My wives adored him," the sound hashira smirks, looking almost hungry. "Once this is all over, I'll make him my fourth–"

"Oh, fuck off!" Shinazugawa growls, baring his teeth at him.

That's when everyone starts talking at the same time. Aoi worries for a moment, but Oyakata-sama and his wife seem to be enjoying the situation.

"Wait!" Kocho cuts them off. "How do we know we're talking about the same kakushi boy?"

Finally! Someone is asking the important questions, although Aoi is surprised by the jealousy she notices in her voice.

"What color are his eyes?"

"Red." Everyone says at the same time, even the stone hashira, which makes Aoi feel a little bit confused.

"So it's the same kakushi boy," Kocho huffs, slightly irritated.

"It seemed to me," Ubuyashiki says then, prompting everyone to shut up. "That you wanted to say something else, Muichiro. You brought him up for a reason."

"Yes," Tokito nods, looking slightly shy. "I'd like to learn his name and perhaps... get him to work at my estate."

Chaos unfolds again, mostly because everyone wants Tanjirou to work for them too.

Aoi rolls her eyes.

"You should ask Tanjirou yourselves," Ubuyashiki says with a soft smile on his face. "If he agrees, you can have him working for all of you exclusively, if that's what you want."

All the hashira look ridiculously happy about that. Aoi thought it would take them a while to agree to share him.

Although she has the feeling that's not the only thing they want from him.

"Can we see him now?" Kanroji asks with an excited smile on her face.

"Of course. I believe he's in the butterfly estate at the moment. Aoi can take you there."

Great. Now she has to babysit hashira.

***

"Inosuke!"

At the sound of his voice, all the hashira turn in the same direction. Aoi tries not to roll her eyes again, but it's becoming increasingly tempting the more time she spends with them.

Tanjirou is trying to get the boar head boy to stay still for once, but with very little success.

They're in the backyard now and she has no idea how Inosuke managed to do that if he just came back from a mission.

"Please, you have to take your medicine!"

Playfully, Inosuke pulls Tanjirou's mask down, making fall off his face.

The Pillars gasp and Kocho leans to tell something to Himejima as Tanjirou struggles to put it back on. He blushes.

After a while he takes the mask back and covers his face with it, but the damage is done; they all have seen the scar on his forehead, his cute nose and his red hair that is darker than his eyes.

Even Aoi has to admit that he's really pretty.

"You're so beautiful!" Kanroji says, blushing to the tip of her ears.

"Thank y-you," Tanjirou stammers, still flustered. "But please forget what you saw!"

Yeah, like that is going to happen.

"Oh! It's all of you!" He chuckles as he notices the rest of the Pillars. Aoi swears they make a disgustingly fond expression at the sound of his laughter. "I'm glad to see you again!"

"Would you marry–"

Kocho manages to hit Uzui on the face with one of her butterfly clips.

"Would you like to work for us?" Tomioka asks then, as they slowly gather in a circle around Tanjirou.

"I thought I already did?" He tilts his head in confusion and it's weird that even Shinazugawa seems to find that endearing.

"He means only for us, for the hashira," Iguro says, eagerly waiting for a response.

"Oh."

"You can stay in the hashira headquarters or here if you want. So you can take care of us whenever we come back from a mission!" Rengoku smiles with so much happiness, Aoi is sure she can hear the hearts in his voice.

Even though that should be impossible.

Tanjirou looks at Aoi then, almost like he's asking for permission.

"Oyakata-sama said it was okay if you wanted," she says reluctantly.

"Yes, I'd love to take care of you!"

Aoi is almost certain that they'll be coming here with a tiny scratch or headache, just to see him.

It's going to be a pain in the ass.

Tanjirou giggles when the Pillars start hugging him one by one; he seems confused with their enthusiasm, but since he's a sunshine, he probably thinks they're friends now.

Aoi sighs, well... at least she's sure the Pillars will let someone (Tanjirou) patch them up when they need to.

Even though she'll have to endure their obvious longing on a daily basis.

***

Patreon

#kny #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #tanjiro kamado #sanemi shinazugawa #tengen uzui #kyojuro rengoku #mitsuri kanroji #obanai iguro #shinobu kocho #gyomei himejima #muichiro tokito #giyuu tomioka #giyutan #kyotan

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thedeviltohisangel · 8 months ago

Text

All The Things I Did (2): It's All Around, It's All The Time

a/n: wanted to end with angst but i'll save it. send in blrub reqests for these idiots falling in love

The more he thought about it, the more it seemed like a good idea. All he had to do was ask. He had asked plenty of girls and women out on the town before. All of them had blushed and giggled and obliged with a twirl of their hair and a bat of their lashes. But this one. Cass. She was something else entirely.

John didn’t ever think about deploying overseas resulting in him standing outside the mess hall, hat in hand and a bouquet of flowers sweatily gripped in his hand, pacing and muttering self-encouragement under his breath. You’ve done this a million times. You just ask. So what if she says no? There are a million girls trotting around here you’ve already charmed.

“Major Egan?” Shit. He had thought she was already in there, now he looked panicked and not at all manly. “Am I late?” She checked the watch on her wrist, knowing she would never not be on time down to the minute.

“No I thought you’d be early so I was out here talking myself into asking you to dinner.” There was no better way to say it than to just say it. He expected her to look shocked or abhorred. Anything but the look on her face that made it seem that is exactly what she was expecting.

“Are those supposed to go with the offer?” she asked as she motioned to the grouping of wildflowers he had tasked the children who followed Lemmons around to help him pick. He held them out sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck as she lifted them to her nose.

“They’re not much-”

“They’re lovely.” She smiled, a real smile, and he felt a weight lift off his chest and his own smile spread across his face in kind. “Is dinner here or somewhere else?”

“Was thinking somewhere off base. Show you the John Egan worth knowing.”

“You’ll pick me up?” He nodded emphatically. “Then I will see you at 6.” That would give her enough time to finish her work day and get physically and psychologically prepared for whatever John Egan had in store.

“I’ll see you then,” he spoke with a hint of reverence in his tone, unable to even blink as she held the flowers to her nose again and damn near floated past him into the mess hall. Yes. Something else entirely.

----

She was nervous and she hated it. Hated that she was fretting over a fly away piece of hair only visible if the sun hit it just right. Hated that she only had two tubes of lipstick to choose from and neither of them were the right color. Hated that she had only reconciled breaking the rules to sneak out in anything other than her uniform to avoid Major Egan looking at any other girl in a pretty dress.

“Lieutenant Cooper, Major Egan is here for you.”

“Thank you, Mary.” Cass squared her shoulders and took one last steadying breath. She had faced down much worse. German border guards. Handsy bankers. Her mother when she enlisted instead of marrying Sidney Landry.

“You’re out of regulation,” were the first words out of his mouth when she finally stepped outside.

“Astute.” He opened the Jeep door for her, helping her in before rushing to his side.

“You look lovely.” He meant it sincerely. One of the most beautiful sights he had seen even before the war. And he was sure she would be even for long after.

The ride to a local pub was pleasant enough, John laughing at her earnest attempts to keep her hair in place in the breeze, making her laugh with her whole heart as he sang along to something on the radio. Sang or yelled, the verb was up for debate. He was a perfect gentleman, opening doors and pulling out her chair.

“You’ve given me plenty of grief over my debutante manners all in the hopes of covering up your own,” she mused as he returned from the bar top to their table with a couple of glasses. Coca-Cola for her, a pint for him.

“I’m not a neanderthal,” he quipped back. John went to raise his glass to his lips when he stopped, her hand resting lightly against his wrist.

“Not before a toast.” She cleared her throat. “To kicking Hitler’s ass and looking damn good while doing it.” The beer almost couldn’t get between the lips of his smile.

“You’re very surprising.” Cass hummed in acknowledgment. “I like it.”

“Like it? You like an ice cream flavor over another or you like the color of the tie your parents buy you for Christmas.”

“Well, love is a bit presumptuous, Lieutenant, but if you’re that taken-”

“Smitten. Tell me you’re smitten with me.” There was a dare behind her eyes. Daring him to dip his toes into shark-infested waters.

“I’m smitten with you,” he relented. John thinks she blushed. But before he could tease her about it, a pile of fish and chips was being placed between them.

“Miss Cooper, I wasn’t expecting you tonight! I got a fresh batch of my sponge in the back. Make sure you save room.”

“I will, Patricia, thank you.” John smiled at the interaction, enjoying this version of Spook. She was much more free off base. Captured the attention of everyone she came into contact with. He could only assume these were natural attributes for her job. Alleged job.

“How do you do that?”

“Do what?” she asked with a pop of a chip into her mouth.

“Wrap everyone around your finger in an instant.” He reached for her hand halfway across the table, Cass offering it instantly, filling the gaps in between her fingers with his own to emphasize the point.

“I could give you the same answer I told an empty suit in Washington a few years ago but the answer you want, it’s something I think you have to answer yourself, Major Egan-”

“John, please, Cass.” He was drowning in whatever this was. Needed her to give him an inch just to stay above water.

“John.” He brought her hand to his lips, kissing her knuckles one by one.

“Again.” She swallowed, mouth running dry and eyelids feeling heavy.

“John.” He could feel her pulse in her wrist. Flickering quicker ever so slightly. He thinks he could lose himself in this game. Willingly go insane if it meant having her look at him like this. “I’m smitten with you, too.”

----

Somewhere between the fish and the chips and the sponge and the more than a few pints, John had decided those two bikes out front were going to be his. And they weren’t for sale. So he had to earn them. Why not have some fun in the process?

“Aren’t you going to tell him he doesn’t have to do this?” Cass had thought about it but enjoyed the look on Bucky-no that was too much-John’s face to stamp out the fire.

“Major Egan, it’s just a stupid bet,” one of the British soldiers tried to reason with him.

“I have to do it now. Can’t look like a man who doesn’t follow through on his word in front of my girl.” My girl. That had slipped out when he was refilling his pint glass two or three pours ago. She was still tingling with the warmth it had provided.

“Who’s it gonna be then, Major?” Everyone echoed the call.

“I’ve played everyone,” he paused to hiccup, “and you Irish are about as good as hitting that bullseye as you are hammering your nails.” He pointed at a gentleman named Tommy and called him the best darts slinger in all of East Anglia, grabbing the apple to ready himself for the shot. Cass had resigned herself to the corner, content with watching John from afar.

“You two have been so cute together all night! Why don’t you go give him a good luck kiss?” A group of girls, around her age, had been at the pub either with their own soldier or hoping to find one. They had been longingly admiring the interactions between Cass and John. Like they were in their own little world in the corner of that pub.

“I don’t want to distract him,” Cass protested but she was already rising from her chair and smoothing her skirt.

“I’m sure he will find it a worthy distraction.” The cacophony of giggles followed her to her Major, Cass plucking the apple from his hand purposefully.

“Don’t go losing an eye,” she whispered.

“Fond of them already?” Her lips pressed together to block her words of agreement from slipping out. “Tell you what. I win those bikes from him but I want a kiss from you.”

“A kiss? That’s hardly a prize. Last I counted, you’ve kissed me plenty.” It was true. When she hadn’t rebuked his lips against her knuckles, he had moved to her palms and her wrists and had taken on the habit of kissing the top of her head every time he stood to refill their drinks. God, he had even allowed himself a sinful press of his lips to her forehead when they had swayed to the record playing in the corner only a handful of moments ago.

“A real, proper sweep you off your feet and make your head spin kind of kiss.”

“Then I guess that is worth playing for.” She handed him the apple and pressed a lingering kiss to his cheek either way.

“Alright, Tommy, just not the eye.” Cass held her breath as the dart sailed through the air and let it go once it lodged neatly into the apple on John Egan’s head. The whole place erupted and she watched with a smile and a shake of her head as he hoisted Tommy into the air. He caught her eye and smiled like a champion, straightening his jacket before walking towards her. Her arm extended to hit his chest once he was within reach.

“Outside.” The air inside was suffocating, especially under John’s lovestruck gaze. Her head already felt like it was spinning and he hadn’t even tried to kiss her yet.

“This seems sturdy enough,” he said with a wave of his hand towards a stone wall lining the road.

“Sturdy enough for-” she gasped as his hands grabbed her waist and lifted her on top of it. Their height leveled within a few inches. Instinctually, her fingertips found the hair at the nape of his neck and found purchase. He leaned forward until there was no moonlight between them.

“Can I kiss you?” he whispered. She chased his question with her own answer, her lips meeting his and a symphony echoing in her head. John met her in kind, cupping her cheek in the palm of his hand and stroking his thumb once, twice, three times.

“John.” It was a near moan. She wanted more, more, more. Her shoes fell off her stockinged feet, heels digging into his back to bring him closer.

“You’re going to be the fucking death of me.” He said all the words with one breath to minimize the interruption to the havoc her lips were wreaking on his heart. His arms wrapped tighter around her waist, lifting and turning so he was on the wall and she was on his lap. Cass relished the change in position. Mewling when his hands slid up from her ankles to her thighs and settled at the hem of her dress.

“I need to catch my breath.” She pulled away slightly and pressed a teasing kiss to the tip of John’s nose.

“That feels nice.” She giggled and kissed him again. “You all caught up on your breath?” Cass nodded and with a smirk, she crashed against him over and over again. And if he whispered again how he was smitten with her. And if she rubbed her nose against his with something more than smitten in her intention. And if John Egan looked back on that night from the confines of a POW camp in Germany, that was just between them, the moon and the stars.

#masters of the air #john egan #callum turner #mota #masters of the air fanfiction #masters of the air fanfic #john egan fanfiction #john egan fanfic #callum turner fanfiction #callum turner fanfic

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evergreenalice · 2 years ago

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I'll never get over the fucking tunnel of love scene, it's just the best fucking scene I love it so much

first of all, it follows the objectively amazing scene between Homura and Sayaka

the song "Dream World" begins to play as the Clara Dolls chant "fort, da, fort, da" in the background, the meaning of this I'm too lazy to explain, and if you don't know why the words "fort" and "da" are important to Rebellion, just look it up, there are better explanations than I can give. What's important is that these words relate to Homura and Madoka, the Clara Dolls are an extension of Homura, and thus Homura is presumably thinking about Madoka

as we see Sayaka's cape flying away from their confrontation, Homura begins a monologue

we see Clara Dolls dancing on a pink spool, representative of Madoka (if you don't know why, once again, I request that you look up "fort da Madoka") so once more an indication of where Homura's thoughts currently are

we see two swans, generally a symbol of love (fun fact, because of this one scene the moment I see swans I instantly think of Madoka Magica)

we see Homura standing on the front of of the boat, one of her familiars standing in the boat, not doing anything notable, I bring this up to come back to it later, also it's just a good shot

the world shifts as Homura moves through it, remember, this is essentially her dream, the things that appear are from Homura's mind

we see a paper Kyoko standing on an arch asking us if we're enjoying the movie (thank you for asking Kyoko :) Indeed I am)

a tunnel rises from the ocean

Kyoko says this, displaying essentially the ideal life for Kyoko, her relationship with Mami is never soured, and they're still friends, and they're just doing good stuff, none of the darkness that exists in reality

we see Homura's annoyed, perhaps somewhat conflicted even, face

we enter the tunnel, and it's clearly meant to be a tunnel of love, remember, the things in this world are created from her thoughts, there is a reason for a tunnel of love being here and it has to do with Homura's thoughts, EVERYTHING in this tunnel is from Homura's mind, it existing, everything in it, and where it leads, are from HER thoughts, keep that fact in mind

Mami just outright states that everything is ideal

beautiful shot, nothing else to say

Sayaka outright asks if this is so bad. She has a very goofy face because Homura is annoyed with her, I love this detail "YOU'RE TOO LATE SAYAKA I'VE ALREADY DEPICTED YOU AS THE SOYJACK!"

Homura accidentally criticizing herself, however, once again, EVERYTHING HERE IS HOMURA, this is an argument with herself, she's not disagreeing with paper Sayaka, paper Mami, and paper Kyoko, because they don't exist, they're HER, everything they say are HER thoughts, SHE thinks that this is the ideal world, deep down she wants to stay here, and she hates herself for it, viewing it as weakness.

we cut to Homura kneeling beneath goddess Madoka, Homura views Madoka as a goddess, not just in a descriptive sense, but a prescriptive one. In her eyes Madoka is a perfect being deserving of reverence, her love for Madoka is yes, romantic, but also has undeniably religious elements to it

Homura reaching up towards the statue of goddess Madoka as she talks about her sacrifice, it's just, VERY religious, she's over here like "Madoka died for your despair, accept her into your heart as your lord and savior" and it's like, Homura, this is a really unhealthy way to view your crush

this flashes on screen "who is dreaming?" the reason these runes pop on screen at this point is because it's important to this scene specifically, Homura is essentially denouncing whoever is guilty of being, for lack of a better word, a sinner, so these runes prompt the question of who the "sinner" is, and of course, it is Homura

we cut to a boat on fire

we see little paper cutouts of people drowning, presumably the people who should be being saved right now but aren't

Homura caresses Madoka's legs very heterosexually, I will come back to this later

the Clara Dolls throw tomatoes at the statue and Homura while saying "god is dead" in German, this most obviously signifies the blasphemy of the sinner who created this world (Homura) it's also a Nietzsche quote (Nietzsche and Rebellion is a whole nother conversation though)

it's also worth pointing out that the Clara Dolls's antagonism towards Homura is likely symbolic of bullying, which considering the way Moemura acts, is almost definitely something she went through

remember that everything here is from Homura's mind, that tunnel of love didn't even exist a moment ago, it was created by Homura's mind, that includes where it led, Homura's mind created a tunnel of love while thinking about Madoka that led her to Madoka

Madoka jumps down and lands on Homura, she doesn't emote much, but we know for a fact that this caused A LOT of emotions in her. Remember that familiar I pointed out that wasn't doing much? Well once again, everything in here is part of Homura, representing a part of her mind

as Madoka sits up, we see the familiar excitedly dancing with sparklers, because well, gay

as I said I wanted to come back to the statue's legs later, this is why. Where Homura touched it is marked in inky black. Her devotion to Madoka, her love for her, represented by the caressing of her legs, has only dirtied the statue. She views her love as a dirtying force. And for a lesbian that canonically went to Catholic school, views herself as a demon, and her crush as a pure perfect goddess, that certainly has implications, internalized homophobia is only one possible reading of this scene, but it's the one I choose to go with.

that's the end, I hope you enjoyed!

#Madoka Magica #PMMM #puella magi madoka magica #madoka magica rebellion #madohomu #homumado #madoka kaname #Homura Akemi #analysis

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redphlox · 4 months ago

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Do you think Toya ever had a chance? I feel like his descent into villainy as Dabi was inevitable, I know he has the equivalent of a Quirk disability but I feel maybe it wasn't meant to work like his father's Quirk but in a different way.

I wished Toya had the chance to go back home but Horikoshi pulled a cruel fate on us.

I didn't want Toya to be saved this way, it felt too late and he will always be seen as his family's regret and failure because he is the cruel reminder to everyone that this family was a mistake, nothing but a Quirk experiment.

He can never be seen as anything other than a mistake or regret to make up for out of guilt. I know his family is here now, but it feels more out of obligation more than anything.

I have a few thoughts about how disability is framed in BNHA but I'll reserve my thoughts until after the manga is officially over. I'm not sure if you've read my other posts, but I'm optimistic that Touya's fate isn't to die. I'm not going to entertain doom and gloom on my blog. I'm finding that spiraling is influencing others to think the worst of the worst and causing unnecessary heartache and anxiety. I'm not saying others can't spiral - just don't do it on my blog.

I don't agree with the idea that the family thinks of Touya as a mistake - where does the manga indicate the family thinks his existence was a mistake? Can you show me the panels? No, because they don't exist.

In 301-302, it's plainly stated that the family thinks Dabi was born out of Endeavor's ambition and selfishness and failure as a father. The other children were quirk experiments too, but Rei and even Endeavor NEVER state regret about starting a family - they don't regret their kids. They regret hurting their kids, but they don't regret bringing them into this world. Not once has Rei or Enji stated they regret Touya being born. Neither have the siblings.

The regret the family feels isn't that he exists, but that they feel they failed him in some way - Rei and Enji as parents, Natsuo and Fuyumi as siblings (even though it wasn't their fault at all.) It's only natural to feel responsible and guilty for your loved one's downward spiral and feel like you could have done more if you had known what would have happened (See: Spinner in 427).

The Todorokis love Touya unconditionally (although it was hard to show that during their childhood because of the abuse). That's why they united to stop him, why they united to come see him at the hospital, and that's why they want to talk to him and have SO much to discuss. Touya is literally shivering and his heart rate is speeding up from the happiness of finally feeling wanted and seen now that his family is at his bedside.

They're literally saying, "Tell me all your thoughts. I want to know. I want to be with you."

He's a hated criminal now - BUT they're not abandoning him. They're facing hell right now because of what he did but they're not forsaking him or distancing themselves to save themselves from the public's damnation. They WANT to be with Touya, even if it'll be difficult. They could have easily left him, deserted him, forsaken him, turned their backs, washed their hands clean of him - much like Hawks and his mother distanced themselves from his father.

But the Todorokis HAVEN'T spurned Touya, and WON'T. That's what they're conveying by being at his bedside and telling him they want to talk to him. Nothing he can do can make them stop wanting him. Sure, there might be some resentment and hurt feelings, but that doesn't negate unconditional love.

Horikoshi went out of his way to make each Todoroki family member state they were present in Touya's room because they wanted to be there. "We're not all here out of a sense of duty" = we're all here because we want to be. If reading 426 didn't convince you of that, you might want to step back and reread a few more times.

#bnha #bnha asks #bnha 426 #my meta

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astrologythingzzz · 1 year ago

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Moon sign observations ✨🌝

Hi everyone! I've thought about doing these for a very long time now! I'll be using my own experiences with the moon signs! 🌙

Some observations are going to be more accurate than others!

Take what resonates and please know that none of these are meant to hurt anyone! 🌝

P.s. I started a tiktok account. It's called Astrologythingzzz too. Check it out if you want to! 🧡

Aries moon

My mom has this placement. She's very ambitious, but also really loves to experience new things every other day! She can be very impulsive with money (it is in her 2nd house). Her emotions sometimes get the best of her. She needs variety and stimulation, when she was in her 20s she travelled a lot and had a big friend group! Personally, I've never met many people with aries moons so she's my only reference.

Taurus moon

My dad is a taurus moon. His most used sentence is "You can save money in every part of you life, but you should never save money when it comes to food." I think that's very typical for taurus placements. He craves stability and peace. He loves good food, dancing and family time. His love language is also giving you food that you like! He likes tradition, he's from Italy so he always makes sure that his children are very much in touch with his roots.

Gemini moon

That is my placement! I don't know anyone else with that placement, so I'll write down my own experience with this one. I'm bored easily, but I'm not superficial. Actually I'm not that social and not very outgoing. As a Child i loved reading and fantasising. I get very restless and nervous, sometimes I have sleep issues if my body is in distress (it is in my 12th house tho). I feel like there are two different gemini moon people, the one is the social, outgoing one, the other is socially withdrawn and nervous. Guess I got the latter one! 🌝

Cancer moon

These are the most loving, warm hearted people ever. They do everything for their family, they provide and make the best gifts! They really listen to the people they love, they also sense your feelings and are amazing at comforting. One of my best friends that I used to talk to had this placement. Sadly we are not involved with each other anymore, but she always felt like home to me. You can count on them to cook you your favorite meal or bake your favorite cookies!

Leo moon

Sadly I've never been truly involved with one. The ones that I know are very obsessed with their image. The girl has really long hair, she's even known for it. But the guy has always been very attention craving. He is very sweet deep down and romantic. But also kind of toxic, I feel like he's an unevolved leo moon. Hopefully I'll get to know more leo moons, they seem so warm and welcoming!

Virgo moon

My girl bestfriend has this placement. We both love talking about kind of everything (mercurial moons) wether it be books, gossip, personal stuff... She gets stomach issues when stressed. She loves animals, she has a very deep bond to her pet dog. She lives vegan and loves minimalistic interior design. She always cared for her younger siblings, cooking for them, sometimes even taking the role of a caretaker (she's a cancer sun). We haven't been very much in touch lately, but I still cherish her a lot! She helped me getting through many things and I can count on her to always be honest with me. I have also shared a flat with two other virgo moons, the one was absolutely crazy about houseplants, she had like 30 in her room. She was very nice and gentle, but a little too naggy for me. The other one is my soulsister, we always grabbed food or cooked together which was very fun!!

Libra moon

Sadly, I didn't have the best experience with this placement. A friend in school had this, and she just was very passive aggressive. She wasn't romantic or warm, she was rather cold and aloof. When I started dating my boyfriend, she got so jealous and accused me of never having time for her. We never really hung out anyways, but that's when she started getting toxic. Her mother was very strict so she also became like that. She was also the one person that always complained about the exams but in the end she always had A's. We lost touch after school and I'm very glad about it. I know that she was probably an unevolved libra moon, so I hope I'll get to know the nice, gentle and loving ones! 🌚

Scorpio moon

I lived with one for about 4 months. She was very shy, but she was willing to open up. When you criticised her, she felt completely offended and never really talked to me ever again. She moved out very soon and my other flat mates and I weren't so sad about it. She never talked to us, she didn't even get out of her room after this one incident, where we criticised her for never coming out of her room. We were 4 girls sharing a big flat, 3 of us were always going out and having fun together, she never even read our text messages so we just assumed she didn't want to be involved with us. She just seemed very cold. In the end she blamed us for being cold, even though we invited her out for like a 100 times. We were even a little scared of her, she just seemed so unfriendly. I have never heard of her every since and I'm not mad about it.

Sagittarius moon

I know some people with this placement. Actually many of them are studying to become a lawyer and they're pretty good at it. One of them is becoming a police officer the other wants to be a politician. They cherish their own opinion a lot, they love living life as they want to. They are down for partying every weekend, I also saw a connection with drinking too much... Sometimes the girls are "not like other girls" because of their love for danger and adventure. One of them always felt the need to rub under my nose how much she liked to perform sports and whatever. They are very sporty though. But I sometimes get the feeling they take themselves too seriously. Not my favorite moon placement, but they're alright. They can be a little braggy and their political views can be a little extreme. A love for animals and justice.

Capricorn moon

Sorry, but no. 🧡 They treat everything as a transaction, if they're giving you something, you automatically owe them. They can be funny though and really nice. They are very ambitious. I noticed they do have a problem with feelings, and if they're getting involved with you, it is for the long run. On the other hand, if you don't seem like the one, they will just leave you hanging around until they find a better option. Maybe that's just my experience. I feel like their childhood was very strict, they had to look after themselves and their parents weren't very supportive of them. Might have a narcissistic mom.

Aquarius moon

That's another placement that was my flatmate. She also had a very rough childhood. Her father wasn't even involved, her mother always favoured her brothers over her. It was really hard getting to know her and even though i had loved to stay in touch with her, I haven't heard of her after moving out, which is kinda sad. She was very emotionally codependent on her boyfriend, so there wasn't really space for any other relationship in her life. I just hope she's happy now. :) The other aqua moon I know studies the same subject at university like me. We get along very well, but we're not best friends. She also seems a little distant, she lives in her own world and has her own circle of friends. But she's very nice and very human(?) I love talking to her, it just makes me feel great! 🧡

Pisces moon

This one is a little tricky. My boyfriend has this placement, and he's the most gentle, kind, supportive, understanding and loving person I know. Pisces moons can be the most creative, selfless and caring people in the world. On the other hand, my bully in high school had this placement 💀 She always used me for homework and talked sh*t about me behind my back. I feel like pisces is a placement in general, that really needs to learn how to deal with their gentle and sensitive nature. It seems like many of them try to mask their feelings by being mean/ dominant/aggressive. But it's no weakness to show emotions! 🧡 Because of my boyfriend, it's probably my favorite moon sign! 🧡

That would be it! Hope you liked it!

If you can't resonate, please know that these are my personal experiences with the moon signs. Every moon sign has an evolved and unevolved part. I feel like I met a lot of unevolved ones. Sadly.

Anyways, see you soon, love you. Byee🧡

#astrology #moon signs #moon observations #leo moon #cancer #cancer moon #aquarius moon #pisces moon #libra moon #taurus moon #aries moon #gemini moon #sagittarius moon #virgo moon #capricorn moon #scorpio moon #astrology observations #astro observations

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aishangotome · 4 months ago

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Ellis Twilight: Chapter 10

Chapter 9

♡———♡

Jude and Ellis, their hats pulled low and their mouths hidden behind scarves, stepped into the casino with me.

(Both of them were attracting a lot of attention because they clearly didn't look like ordinary people...)

(But they haven't been discovered yet, right?)

With two suspicious-looking men flanking me, I started to worry that they might be mistaken for kidnappers instead.

Jake: Why are you guys dressed like that?

Jude: ................

Ellis: ................

Kate: Oh, um, we were outside for a long time and got cold!

Kate: Their lips are numb and their voices are shaking, so they said they might not be able to talk for a while.

I could hear Jude cursing under his breath at my desperate excuse.

(I think I heard him say, "Ya coulda come up with a better lie...")

Jake: Oh dear, take care!

(Whew! He doesn't seem suspicious at all)

Kate: Oh, thank you. It's not that bad, so don't worry!

Jake: Are you weak? You won't be able to make it in the circus if you don't train properly!

Jake laughed cheerfully and patted Jude on the shoulder with his large hand.

Jude: ................

(Oh, he's angry... I'll pretend I didn't see that)

Ellis: ..............

Ellis winked at me as if to say, "Nice save."

Jake walked further into the casino and stopped in front of a door with two security guards. He took off his hat and bowed.

Jake: Hey there, could you tell the owner that I brought some more circus friends?

(...The mastermind behind the kidnapping might be beyond this door)

(Maybe the victims are too...)

I took a small breath and entered the room.

The eyes of several strong-looking men inside turned to us at once.

Jake: Sorry I'm late for our appointment. I had a wonderful encounter!

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: I've been waiting for you, Jake! Are these people the wonderful encounter you mentioned?

Jude and Ellis: .............

(This is the casino "owner" Jake was talking about)

If our guess is correct, he's the one who orchestrated the kidnapping.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: You've brought some very... lively ones this time.

The man in silver-rimmed glasses stared at us rudely.

(This is the mastermind behind the kidnapping...)

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: Miss and gentlemen, judging by your clothes and the glow of your skin...

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: You don't look like you were lured to the circus by hunger for money or fame.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: Why are you interested in the circus?

(...He's suspicious...)

The moment I instinctively read the man's expression, I heard a click.

(The door to the room is locked...!)

A prickling tension filled the room.

In the strained atmosphere, Jude and Ellis calmly approached the man called the owner.

Jude: I've always admired the performances of Jake Grace, a man who made his name in a grand spectacle.

He spoke in fluent Queen's English.

His refined manner of speaking, devoid of his usual accent, was so different that it almost felt like someone else was talking.

(Wow, he's completely different... With this way of speaking, his identity shouldn't be exposed...)

Jude: However, I still have some doubts. There's always a catch to a good deal.

Jude: You're saying that you'll guarantee our food, clothing, and shelter until the circus is established. Are you the representative?

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: Yes. I'm in charge of the investment in Mr. Jake. Although, there are people above me.

(So this guy isn't the top of the gang either...?)

(Is he like one of the factions within it?)

Jude: Does the "higher-up" know about this investment?

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: ...I don't think it's necessary for a mere member to know that.

Jude glanced at Ellis and me.

From our experience in business negotiations and crisis situations, this meant... "Get to your positions."

(In other words...)

(It's time to start the commotion...!)

The moment Ellis kicked over a vase, I instinctively hid behind the table.

As the gang's attention was drawn to the loud noise, Jude spoke.

Jude: Restrain the guy with glasses. I'll take care o' the rest.

Ellis: Roger that.

As soon as they communicated in the brief moment the gang members were drawing their guns, Ellis lightly kicked the ground.

In the next instant, he leaped onto the table and then above the gang members' heads.

(...As always, his movements are amazing)

Before the panicked gang members could aim their guns, Ellis' long fingertips touched the owner's head... and the owner's wrists snapped together as if bound by an invisible rope, unable to move.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: Wh-What is this...?

Ellis: This one's done.

(He restrained the owner in no time. What about Jude...?)

Like a puff of smoke, Jude slipped into the midst of the opponents and touched their foreheads.

The gang members immediately collapsed to the floor one after another.

(Is that Jude's ability...?)

(The people he touched... they don't seem dead, but...)

The sight of people losing consciousness and collapsing as if their strings had been cut, without being punched or kicked, was eerie and sent chills down my spine.

Jake: Wh-What's going on? Who are you guys?

(Oh right, I completely forgot about Jake...!)

He was just being used by the gang.

If so, it would be dangerous for him to be in the middle of this brawl.

Gangster: Damn it! You brought troublesome guests!

Kate: ...!

I saw a gun being pointed at Jake in my peripheral vision.

Kate: Dodge it...!

Jake: Whoa!?

Without time to think, I threw myself at Jake with all my might.

I fell to the floor with Jake, who stumbled.

Kate: Ugh...!!?

Jake's huge body landed heavily on my leg.

A sharp pain shot through me, my breath stopped for a moment, and cold sweat broke out all over my body.

(It hurts...)

Jake: I-I'm sorry, are you alright, miss!?

Kate: I-I'm fine...

(The pain is making my vision blurry...)

But I couldn't stay down any longer, thinking that they might point a gun at me again.

Kate: ...Ha...

I desperately tried to lift my body, which screamed in pain with every breath, but I couldn't stand up. I could only lift my head while lying on my stomach.

(...! Everyone except the owner has lost consciousness)

Thanks to Jude's ability, the room was completely silent, and Ellis was holding a black-bladed knife to the owner's neck.

(Ellis...)

At that moment, our eyes met - his twilight-colored eyes looking at me with concern as I lay on the floor.

He looked like he was about to rush over to me, so I hurriedly suppressed the pain and gave him a smile.

(I'm fine!)

If we let the owner escape now, it would all be for nothing.

Ellis: ......

His twilight-colored eyes wavered with anxiety, but he didn't lower the knife.

Jude: 'Ey, you.

Jake: Huh?

Jude, who had somehow gotten close, touched Jake's forehead.

Jake's consciousness instantly vanished, and his body collapsed on the spot.

Kate: Why even Jake?

Jude: This is Crowns' job now. If he saw this, we'd hafta kill 'im too.

(Crowns' job...)

In my pain-blurred vision, I saw Jude walking away.

The restrained owner glared at Jude, who stood before him, with his small eyes behind his glasses.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: That accent, the bodyguard with the black knife... You're the trader who sent one of our executives to prison, aren't you?

Jude: Where are the recruits?

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: ...Even if I knew, I wouldn't tell you.

Even though there was no one left in the room to help him, the owner had an arrogant smile on his lips.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: If you kill me, you won't get away with it. I suggest you back off.

Jude: Is tha' so? Then die.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: What?

Jude: Even if ya don't talk, we can easily get the information by torturin' yer underlings.

Ellis: Wait, can we kill him?

Jude: There's no doubt this guy is the casino owna' an' the mastermind behind the kidnappin'.

Jude: From what he said earlier, the uppa' echelons of the gang aren't involved in this kidnappin'.

Jude: He's the one responsible fer the execution. If he can't give us any information, he's jus' garbage.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: Wh-What!? If you kill me, you'll make enemies of all the gangs in London!

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: The "higher-ups" won't stay silent either!

Jude: Ha, ya have a high opinion of yer own worth.

Jude: The "higher-ups" dun care about a memba' who screwed up by meddlin' in shady business without their permission.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: ...!

Seeing him turn pale and lose his words, Jude twisted his lips as if amused.

I remembered Ellis saying, "I love hearing the screams of people I hate."

Jude: Let me tell ya somethin' to take to yer grave.

Jude: There's no such thing as a human bein' who can kill an' get away with it.

Jude: If ya didn' even understand that an' still went around kidnappin' an' killin' people, then you'll regret it in hell.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: H-Huh... I'll talk, I'll tell you everything...!

The owner readily opened his mouth under Jude's threat.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: The kidnapping was a plan I started for money!

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: I happened to see Jake, who had fallen from grace and was drinking himself into oblivion, and I thought of using him...!

Ellis: Where are the people who were brought here as potential circus members?

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: --They were all handed over to a human trafficking broker.

Ellis: Where did they go after that?

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: Probably abroad. I don't know any more than that.

(So, Bill's acquaintances were all sold abroad by a shady broker...)

--If that's the case, they'll never come back.

Jude: Tch... Abroad, huh? That's outside our jurisdiction.

Ellis: Even if Victor tries his best, it'll be difficult to track them down...

Their voices deepened the sense of despair.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: Hey! I talked, didn't I? Let me go!

Ellis gave the shouting owner a cold look.

Ellis: ...I never promised to let you go if you talked.

Man with Silver-Rimmed Glasses: Wh-What...?

Ellis: Our goal is to stop the kidnapping. And then...

Ellis: To punish the perpetrators.

Ellis: We wanted information because we want to help the victims.

Ellis: Just because you gave us information doesn't mean you're innocent, right?

Ellis: That's why I can't let you go... I'm sorry.

(Ellis...)

In my fading consciousness due to the pain, I listened to their exchange.

The scenery had been distorted for a while now, and my head was getting hazy.

But even in this state, I knew clearly that Ellis was about to get his hands dirty.

For the sake of Her Majesty who ordered the mission, for the sake of the victims, and to prevent any more victims.

Even though I knew it was necessary, I couldn't help but feel my heart ache.

Kate: Ellis...

Unable to stop him or silently watch, I called out his name, and he smiled wryly.

Ellis: ...I'm sorry.

Ellis: Kate- close your eyes.

(Ah...)

Cranberry jam-like red splattered the surroundings.

Before the smell of blood reached my nostrils, my consciousness was swallowed by darkness.

---

(...Wait...)

(What happened to me...?)

I felt like I was being cradled by something warm and swaying gently.

I drifted in a vague sense of time for who knows how long... and slowly regained consciousness.

---

(This is... the bed in the basement?)

I saw a bag of ice water placed on my calf.

Roger: --There seems to be no abnormality in the bone, but judging from the swelling, there's a high possibility of a muscle strain.

Roger: She needs to avoid moving it for a few days.

Ellis: ..............

Jude: It's fine. We solved the kidnappin' case, so she can rest easy.

Familiar voices drifted into my hazy ears.

Roger: Well, that's true.

Ellis: ...Roger.

Roger: Hmm? What is it?

(Ellis...?)

Ellis's profile looked terribly uneasy, and my chest tightened.

I had seen him look worried before, but this was the first time I had seen him so downcast.

Ellis: Kate, she'll be able to walk properly, right?

(...Is he making that face because he's worried about me?)

Roger: Yeah, she'll be fine. If she rests properly, that is.

Ellis: Rest properly...

Ellis: ...Understood.

(Don't make that face. I'm fine...)

I tried to say so, but only a faint sigh escaped my lips.

Kate: Ah...

Jude and Ellis: ...!

Both Ellis and Jude looked towards the bed in surprise.

Roger: Oh, you're awake, lil' lady... Did you happen to hear our conversation just now?

Kate: Yes... I'm sorry for getting injured during the mission. And on top of that, I can't move for a few days...

My voice was hoarse at first and I couldn't speak well, but gradually I was able to move my mouth.

Ellis: ...Kate, don't worry about anything.

Interrupting my words, Ellis sat down on the bed where I was lying.

With a creak, the ceiling disappeared from my sight as Ellis filled my vision.

Ellis: It's not your fault that you got hurt or that you need to rest.

Ellis: Leave everything to me.

Kate: ...Everything?

Ellis: Yes.

Ellis: Everything.

Chapter 10 Premium Story

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#ikemen series #cybird #cybird otome #cybird ikemen #ikemen villains #ikevil translations #ikevil #ikevil ellis twilight #ellis twilight #ellis twilight translations #ellis twilight main story translation #ellis twilight main route translation

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fungalittleweirdo · 9 months ago

Note

Maybe one one of the brothers(rise) with a crush on reader but hears from Casey that resder marries/falls in love with someone else/doesn't make it.Whatever you feel like.ALSO LETS GO NEW WRITING BLOCK‼️‼️‼️

cyrill my friend i am going to feed you so well here

hmmmm

donatello x male reader, set a couple years after kraang-- the good timeline

i asked my friends to pick a turtle and a gender so i got that lol

i'll get more organised as i write more on this blog trust meee </3

enjoy!

Communicate With Your Lab Partner, Donatello!

"I see the way you look at him, Donnie."

He blinks, takes a deep breath, and shakes his head with an awkward laugh. "I don't know what you're talking about Casey, it's nothing. I've just been thinking a lot about him lately. I hope he and his eventual partner are happy together, that's all. I want my lab partner to be happy." Donatello's face contorts for a moment before it finally lands on an off-putting smile, "Anything but could affect the efficiency of which our labs are conducted."

Casey shakes his head and looks away, "Now I regret telling you about them." The time traveller sighs, standing up to frown at the softshell mutant. Donatello waves him off and urges him out of his lab, muttering about how Casey has nothing to worry about and that he would carry on like normal. But that very night he finds himself staring at the ceiling of his lab, blinking away the blurring of his vision. Donnie reaches for his phone without adjusting his posture, holding it above his face to check the time.

2:42 am.

He yawns, scrolling up to find his lab partner had texted him a funny picture of some cat meme. Donnie's lips curl up and his chest blooms with warmth as he reacts to the photo with a laughing face emoji, then responds with a meme of his own. His friend reacts with a straight faced emoji, responding with you're not funny, stop pretending you are. Donatello rolls his eyes, continuing to talk to him as the hours pass by, and when he checks the time again it is seven in the morning. It's time for the spiny softshell to head to bed even though he was meant to stay up all night regardless.

Lab Partner (7:02 AM): I know you should be heading to sleep now, but before you go, what's the weather going to be like Friday night?

Donatello sits up straight and winces as his neck's pain receptors send massive signals to his tired turtle brain, screaming at him to go to bed. He opts to shrimp over his keyboard as he checks his weather prediction algorithm, finding that there would be a seventy percent chance of rain over the tri-state area. He texts the extensive information to his lab partner, then asks him why he needs to know.

Lab Partner (7:11 AM): I asked this person out to go to Central Park expecting it to be sunny because of this week's forecast

Lab Partner (7:11 AM): But I trust your weather algorithm a lot more

Lab Partner (7:12 AM): Especially since they let Warren Stone back on the air

Delivered (7:12 AM): Scoff, any weatherman who associates themselves with that literal worm cannot be trusted for the weather. You came to the right turtle.

Lab Partner (7:13 AM): Yeah, I know I did

Lab Partner (7:13 AM): Get some rest, okay Don? I love you <3

Donatello's heart skips a beat and he stares at the screen for a moment, blinking at the three silly little words he somehow feels like he stole. Just for a moment, I could pretend... he thinks, pursing his lips as he responds in kind, then gets up from his chair to turn everything off in his lab, save for the emergency low lights. He begins heading toward his bedroom with his phone off in his hand.

The softshell is now lying awake, staring at his ceiling as he lay in bed fantasising of silly things he thought could never happen. It's bothering him, he knows it, but he doesn't feel like paying a visit to Dr. Feelings. His hand's gentle caresses on his plastron remind him of how his lab partner would hug him from behind and sway with him as he works, even though it always distracts him for a moment. The stim always brings him down to earth when he is in too deep in his work. Donatello misses the way he nuzzles into him when he's sleepy, spending days working on something together and letting him sleep on the air mattress he has set up in the corner. He misses the opportunities in which his lab partner would ask for him to sleep beside him, curling up in each other's arms.

Now that he thinks about it, Donatello and his lab partner are not strictly platonic, the way they interact with each other is quite intimate. The turtle blushes at the memory of his lips carefully planting kisses on his lab partner's head, and him doing the same. It was kismet, the way they met, since Donnie's lab partner was a former member of the Purple Dragons. Kendra let him go after he started spending too much time with the softshell rather than just spying on him. He risked so much for me, Donatello thinks, wringing his hands as he blinks away his exhaustion. He decides to take matters into his own hands, falling asleep with an uneasy feeling in his gut.

Donnie's lab partner wakes up with a start after a four hour sleep, promising Leo he would sleep more, then berating him for staying up late too. He makes himself a small breakfast and goes through his phone, then gets ready for his free day. Donnie calls him and he answers with a dramatic groan of annoyance. "Don, I swear, go back to sleep," he starts packing a bag to go out while listening to Donnie whine over the phone.

"I know! I know! You told me to rest and I already did. But you didn't sleep enough either so you're a hypocrite. I... wanted to talk to you about something."

"Can it wait? You need to sleep, dude."

"No, it can't."

Donnie seems to take a shaky breath, then speaks again.

"I need to tell you something important and I can't wait another day to tell you."

The mutant's lab partner sighs, then nods, even if 'Tello couldn't see him make the gesture.

"Yeah, I'll be over tonight. As long as you rest."

"I promise... I love you."

He pauses, the words ringing in his ears, bouncing around in his head like a screensaver avoiding the corners of its device. He's never heard Donnie say those words out loud before. He's never said them to him either, so the initiative shocks him into silence. Before the boy could respond, Donnie hung up the call and he stands in the kitchen with toast crumbs in his palm and marmalade on his fingers.

The difference between saying it out loud and sending it over text is made apparent in the boy's head, a realisation taking over as his heart beat faster in his rib cage. Oh... no... Being Donnie's lab partner has been fun these past few years, especially developing a close friendship like the one they have, but he finally realises how he must have come across. I should get my errands done quick to be at the lair in a timely manner, he thinks, washing his hands and grabbing his things to step out of his apartment, locking the door and starting his day.

Donatello is bleary-eyed and yawning to the point where his throat is dry. He stumbles into the kitchen to look for a glass of water, asking S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. to serve him some hydration. He gulps it down instantly and slams the glass down on the counter, then jumps at the voice in the corner of the kitchen.

"Happy to see you're drinking water, 'Tello."

An awkward smile plasters itself upon his face as he turns toward his lab partner, looking him up and down. He is wearing comfortable clothes as if he plans to stay a while. His tail twitches before he stops it from wagging in excitement.

"Ah, my favourite friend! I... I expected you to come to the lair much later."

"I can see that," He raises an eyebrow as he gives Donatello a once over, noting the black sweatpants he donned. "Cold?" The boy's arms snake their way around Donatello's waist and he jumps at the contact, nudging him away with a robotic laugh.

"Cold? Scoff! Who said I was cold?" Donatello now feels awake enough to serve himself his own water, watching it fill his glass as his friend stood beside him curiously. Then he gulps the entire glass down again.

"You usually wear clothes down here when you're cold. You don't opt for pyjamas like your brothers either, so you must be cold."

"Oh dear lab partner, how dare you use your observational skills on me."

Said lab partner chuckles and leans against the fridge. "You also don't reject my physical advances toward you... Is today a bad tactile sensory day?" He taps in a pattern against the countertop, signalling to Donatello that he is mildly worried. The softshell sighs and puts the glass down in the sink, stretching and cracking his limbs. He inhales through his nose, then exhales cool air that gradually calms him down.

"I am afraid of what I want to talk about."

The boy's eyes widen, his face depicts concern, and he moves on to sit on the stool beside the rack holding the pots and pans. Donatello goes to sit on the counter across from him. A couple beats of silence pass as the two look at each other, studying one another's body language. The turtle came to the conclusion that his lab partner is laidback enough to take the conversation seriously but without too much panic. He feels relaxed enough to continue talking, so he does.

"I am aware that the future Casey speaks of—whenever he feels ready to, that is—is much different compared to ours. Everything that happened in that timeline is completely irrelevant to now due to the butterfly effect. You know, how a flap of a butterfly's wings could summon a hurricane? Well... something he told me keeps nagging me. It keeps this voice in my head rambling on and on, it won't stop telling me things that make me feel... Things. I don't know what! I am feeling things and I hate when I do because I can't label them!"

Donatello stands up and begins pacing, cracking his fingers one by one as he continues to talk and his lab partner listens.

"Casey told me you had a partner in the future. It was great at first... spending a little under a decade together... then they were possessed by Kraang biomatter. You... you disobeyed Leo's orders to look for them, to capture them and keep them under control for when I found a serum to inject in them, one that could kill off the Kraang schmuck but leave their human flesh unaffected... But you didn't make it back to base."

He stands from the stool he sat on and approached Donatello, carefully holding his hands out, palms facing up. The softshell takes his hands and revels in their softness, visibly relaxing and staying put.

"Your passing is not what affects me the most," Donatello reaches up to cup his friend's cheek in his hand, swiping his thumb lightly across his face. "It's you sharing your affections with anyone other than I. That is what is bothering me."

The boy freezes, blinking up at Donatello with a confused smile. "You're the only one I share moments like these with. I don't understand what you're saying," he giggles, reaching up to squeeze Donatello's hand. The scientist is equally as perplexed.

"I'm saying that I love you."

He stands up straighter, rigid and unyielding. Heat spreads upon his face and he looks away, his laugh wavering.

"You know, hearing that in person sounds a lot better."

Donatello still holds his breath, waiting, waiting, waiting.

"I love you too, Donnie."

The mutant feels lightheaded when he exhales, then leans in for a second before stopping himself. His lab partner grins, nodding while he bites his lip knowingly. Donatello springs into action, gripping his friend's shoulders and pulling him in to meld his lips on his, tasting, savouring, fluttering his eyes shut as a grin stretched across his face, parting from the kiss with muddy, blushing cheeks.

"Can we do that more? That was really nice. I would like to open a document for this... if you let me."

He rolled his eyes and pulled his favourite turtle closer.

"Yes, you may, 'Tello. We have all the time in the world."

#rottmnt #rottmnt writing #rise of the tmnt #rise donnie #rise donatello #rottmnt donnie #rise donnie x reader #oneshot #no beta we die like gram gram #angst #light angst #fluff #angst with a happy ending #yippee

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