#i mean. i think the mv is just a friendship/‘idols are cool’ mv if you watch it with no thoughts; head empty

[ozis-paradise]

ØZI for Tatler

published july 3rd, 2020

[translated by me, proofread by @baobeejun]

Free like water, a born star! From Irene Yeh's son to the new king of popular music, the dazzling star you need to know: ØZI!

Bright red highlighted hair, equally red earpieces hanging around his neck. The boy with eye-catching tattoos is sitting on the make-up chair, skipping his feet while eating breakfast and he exudes a rebellious and free, yet delicate and pure atmosphere. Soon after his debut, he was shortlisted for six Golden Melody Awards last year and won Best New Artist. At the mention of his name, everyone will exclaime admiration and excitement, ØZI seems to have become a synonym of "cool" and "red" among the younger generation.

"I think I'm too rational, 100% rational, I should also be a little sentimental." This cool-looking artist was told by his agent that "his temper is very good, he most likely won't look angry." Isn't it a little unexpected for a rational rapper to be so talkative? Doesn't he also like to drink beverages with either honey or strawberry? Everytime ØZI gives a new answer, people have to reconstruct the imagine they already had in mind of him, contrasting to his appearance there is a vibrant and rich soul ready to stir trouble (in a "catching peoples attention" kinda way). Speaking of his definition of freedom, ØZI jokes "Freedom means that my agent won't call me, no work, blocking my agent's calls!" But in fact, the interpretation of freedom in his heart is somewhat aloof and mature: "Because society has a lot of rules, as far as I can tell, no-one is free; from family, love to friendship, they all have their own rules. But freedom comes from inner stability, it should be "like water", just then you're free. When it is placed in different containers, it becomes it's shape, it can adapt to every environment; to me, this state is freedom, because you can be free from restrictions and confined space."

When asked if he's free now, he mutters "Not necessarily, sometimes I get stuck when my inspiration runs out. It's been a little better lately, it wasn't like water in the second half of last year, instead it was more like ice cubes!" Last year was too busy to think, it was described by ØZI "like the mind is drying out". And because of his plans to go to the United States to relax at the beginning of this year - he didn't expect the immediate outbreak to happen - he got more time to produce, "I'm free now, I'm simply water now!", he smiles.

Living in a prominent family of performing artists - his mother Ye Ailing is an all-round entertainer, his father Chen Wenbin is a well-known photographer - ØZI's creative path can be said to be expected. Because his parents are both in the industry, he grew up in a musical environment ever since he was a child. But when it comes to his own creations, in fact, ØZI liked to draw as a kid. In Junior High, he liked to make and arrange music, in High School he began to write melodies, lyrics, from drawings to producing movies, "creations" of change because as a child, he liked to be "original" about this. He had six Music Videos, all on his iPhone. "At first, my dad said that there were a lot of problems with my Music Videos, so I was trying hard to improve, I learned about lighting and so on, just to prove that my Music Videos can look good, I wanted to get his approval!"

The requirement of children of celebrities is a blessing but it's hard to hold a grasp of it, it's difficult to excuse mistakes. The music world describes it as "to be born a Super Saiyan (means something like "Second-Generation-Star" because he's the son of famous parents). ØZI explains: "I was just lucky to be born into a musical family, I have enough space to be understood and supported. My dad knows what it's like to be a creator, my mom knows what it's like to be a performer. So I had the chance to train to become a Super Saiyan." It's a double edged sword, everyone was paying close attention when ØZI was nominated at the Golden Melody Awards. "After the rookie award, in addition to putting myself under a lot of pressure, I didn't change any of my creative motives and I'm very expressive. So if you don't get rewarded, you get mad at yourself." Maybe stress occasionally hinders his creative work, but at the same time, it's also a sign of determination to succeed and break through the golden sunken ship.

ØZI's first well-known Chinese song "Title" is about not being bind by anything, about wanting to have more freedom, more creative freedom for everyone. He's been making music for his "mission to internationalize Chinese Music" from the very beginning. "The internationalisation is something that not everyone can do, we listen to music from Latin America, Hip-Hop, K-Pop, it's all because of their atmosphere. For me, every artist has their own way of interpretating their culture. It's very important to let everyone know "Oh, that's C-Pop!"" And the new plans of ØZI will be followed by the release of some singles, a new album will also be released this year. He also revealed that he's working on three different projects at the same time now, experimental and core concept types. There's even a project that's "looking for the next stage of ØZI" trying to give his music a new image. "There will be a lot of music you have never heard from ØZI before, some experimental music, I can't reveal much!"

He's 100% rational when it comes to his family, but his sentimental tone betrayed him; when he talks about music, he becomes serious. Introducing his new tattoo is as exciting as being a little boy. His soul is free, but "ØZI" still has a lot of unavoidable restrictions.

"ØZI is the character I created, he's the embodiment of self-confidence, he has to be perfect. The self-confidence this character needs will be infused into my spirit, but this is only one part of it", he says slowly. With his high and straight nose bridge and the fine and smooth line of his chin, ØZI looks somewhat like his mother Ye Ailing; but he has taken off the label of being a celebrity's child, that used to stick on him tightly, a long time ago already. He's ØZI, free like water, a born star.

TATLER discusses with ØZI

What do you do to pass the time that make a perfect holiday?

Go to the beach of an uninhabited island alone or with a group of friends, lie on the beach and drink cocktails, read a book, maybe listen to music, sleep.

What do you like to do the most when you don't have to work?

Playing video games, eating, getting a massage, sleeping, watching Netflix.

If you could have one drink with an idol, who would it be?

Canadian Rapper/Singer Drake! So I can understand his logic of running his OVO Empire and see if I can absorb it and apply it on my own label.

Your motto?

The tattoo on my leg, it's a famous quote from "Batman: The Dark Knight Rises": "Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up."

Who is your life idol? Why?

Christopher Nolan, the director of "Inception"! Actually, everyone who gives me inspiration for a period of time is my idol.

What would you recommend to watch on Netflix?

I actually watch anything, from serious "13th" to pure entertaining "Too Hot To Handle", I want to absorb different elements.

Please define freedom in one sentence?

Be like Water!

Which abroad city do you want to visit first after the ban gets lifted?

Greece! I went there for the first time when I was shooting the MV to "Paradise Island", and I thought I have to come back when I get the chance to! It has a peaceful charm between the island and the city, it has their own ancient culture and beach parties, everyone is very relaxed and the atmosphere is very cool.

Favourite drink?

Apple Milk or Honey Water, I like the Honey or Strawberry kind.

When your mood is low, what do you do to cheer up?

Playing video games, hanging out with friends, working out.

What games have you been playing lately?

The remake of Final Fantasy 7, the graphics have changed very beautifully.

[utopianvoices]

one and only | l.minho

↭ genre: relationship au; angst, fluff

↭ word count: 2.2k

↭ a/n: big big shoutout to @chanrismatic for giving me basically the whole plot idea!

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

you and minho were no doubt a really busy couple

you were busy with your uni and he was busy with his idol career 

but that didn’t stop ya’ll from seeing each other as often as ya’ll could

which was really often

because you two always found time for each other 

he was your pillar of support when you were going through tough times in uni and you were his when he was going through all the stress of idol life

well it’s pretty funny how ya’ll met

because lo and behold

you were jisung’s sister

one day when you go and visit your brother at the dorm because who else are you gonna annoy other than your twin brother

this amazingly handsome and hot and pretty and cute boy opened the door you were knocking on incessantly 

“yea yea i’m coming calm yourself wo-”

he just stopped mid sentence and stared at you 

and you stared at him

and you probably would have continued staring if it wasn’t for him shouting for jisung

“JISUNG WHY IS THERE A GIRL WHO LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE YOU AT OUR DOORSTEP”

but what you didn’t hear because of how distracted you were by the loud clashing noises coming from the dorm is the “but the cuter and prettier version of you” that minho uttered underneath his breath

before you could say anything

a wild jisung catapults straight into your arms and squeezes the life out of you

“OMG IT’S THE UGLY TWIN!!! I’VE MISSED YOU SO MUCH!!!!”

“jisung i saw your ugly ass two days ago”

“so???? i still miss you”

yep ya’ll were a cute pair of twins

so you were just spending the day with jisung when you ask the question that’s been on your mind since the moment the door to the dorm opened

“hey poop, who’s the guy that opened the door for me? you know the one who wasn’t very good looking or anything”

clearly you were amazing at being subtle

jisung gives you the side eyes and just goes “hmMMHmm” in his head

“that’s minho hyung. he’s the dancer in our team, born in 1998 and will probably date you”

you did a double take and just put on your innocent face like nOoooooO you totally didn’t want to date him

but you end up dating him anyway 

end of flashback and back to the present

you were done with your classes pretty early that day because one of your professors called in sick

and it just so happened to be your last class

so you messaged your boyfriend asking him if he was free for lunch

and perfectly, he was out and about with the rest of the boys filming the street mv for their song “rock” 

and he was clear from schedules for the rest of the day

so replies to your message saying that they were just done with filming and that he will meet you at the starbucks with the rest of the boys

and adds a lot of fluffly and cringey emojis

which makes your heart go baduMP BADUMP

you leave your campus with a smile on your face and make your way to the starbucks

the boys were already at said starbucks fighting over who was gonna pay for the drink we all know its gonna be chan in the end

when minho feels someone tapping his shoulder

he turns around to see his childhood girl best friend

he smiles the widest smile because he hadn’t seen her for years after she moved away from seoul

and grabs her in a hug

“omG i haven’t seen you for so long!!!! it’s been years, (f/n)!”

“tell me about it!!! my my look at you minho you haven’t changed one bit” his friend teased him

while all this was going on, the boys were gaping at the both of them

before jisung let out a really exaggerated cough and gave minho a pointed look that screamed “please explain as to why you’re fucking clinging onto this girl”

but minho doesn’t catch onto it because of how excited he was to see his best friend

“guys this is my childhood best friend, f/n!!! we grew up together since our diaper days and i haven’t seen her in years!”

jisung, clearly not pleased about it, mutters a “right” and turns towards the rest of the group who were clearly tensed up

minho, forgetting about the rest of his friends, grabs his friend’s hand and leads her to a table, where they sit and catch up on all the years they had missed

and while all these eventful things had been happening, it totally slipped minho’s mind that his girlfriend was on his way to the starbucks, excited to see him after a good week of hardly any time spent together

you walk into the starbucks and spot the boys first, but finding it odd that minho wasn’t with them

but you still walk over to them and greet them with a hug

“hey guys where’s minho?”

“umMMmm well you see he-”

and before chan could explain the situation to you, you hear the voice of your boyfriend that you would recognise anywhere 

accompanied by a girl’s voice

you whip your head around just to see the girl grab minho’s hand and say the words that made your whole world come crashing down around you in a split second

“i can’t believe i’m doing this now but i’m in love with you minho. since we were kids. but i was too scared to tell you because i was convinced you were going to reject me and we would lose our friendship. but over the years my feelings just got stronger and here i am pouring everything to you”

you immediately turn around on your heels and leave before the tears start falling because you hated crying in front of people

minho looks at his friend shocked not knowing what to reply, when he hears a door slam

he turns around just to catch a glimpse of your furious silhouette leaving the starbucks

what the fuck did he just do

he was about to get up and go after you but jisung who had, together with the rest of the boys, witnessed everything stopped him with a glare

“don’t” was the only thing he mutters before running after you

minho can only stand there shocked as the sight of his love leaving the store with anger, frustration and hurt, drives daggers into his heart 

that’s when he remembers that his friend is still sitting there, watching the whole scene unfold with an open mouth

“i’m sorry f/n but i already have a girlfriend who i really love more than anything. and i don’t know what i’ll do if i lose her”

the thought of losing you was enough to cause the tears to well up in his eyes

f/n nods and shoots him a sad but understanding smile, knowing that she had no chance with him because he was clearly with someone who made him happy

“it’s alright minho. i’m just glad i got it out of my system because it’s been eating my alive, not knowing what you were thinking. i’m really sorry for causing all this trouble....” she trailed off, looking at the door uncertainly

“it’s fine, really. you couldn’t have known” minho mumbled, still unable to concentrate fully when his thoughts kept wondering back to you

“can we..... can we still be friends?” 

minho shoots her a small but genuine smile and replies with a “best friends forever”

the two friends smile at each other and she encourages him with a “go get your girl”

that’s all he needed to scramble up to his feet and make his way towards the door

the rest of the boys who had been looking at the whole scene unfold, rushed towards him once they realised he had sorted things out with his friend

they shoot her an apologetic smile and leave the starbucks in a hurry, clearly wanting to help their teammate get his girl back

you, on the other hand, were in your and minho’s shared apartment, bawling your eyes out into your pillow

the rational part of your brain was telling you that you probably shouldn’t have jumped to a conclusion and left without an explanation

but 99% of your brain was ruled by irrationality at that point

you heard your brother’s voice float through the apartment, seemingly sounding closer and closer as he walked towards where you were

you felt the bed sink as he sat at the edge, rubbing your back and whispering for you to calm down

soon you calmed down, hiccupping here and there as you crawled into your brother’s arms 

“you know he loves you a lot right? i want to tell you that maybe you should have listened to him but i don’t think that’s what you need now”

“you literally just told me dipshit”

“oops i guess it was meant to be jammed into your brain”

you smacked your annoying but loving brother and sighed

“do you think it’s too late if i go back and ask for an explanation now?”

jisung just turned and looked at you like you were dumb

which you kinda were, at that point of time

“y/n, my sweet sweet dumb sister, even if you were to hit him i’m sure he couldn’t get mad at you. have u seen the disgusting googly eyes he has whenever he sees you?”

and following this statement, jisung fake gagged, earning a light slap from you

you looked at him with determination in your eyes and got up, ready to call your boyfriend when the door to your apartment burst open, with 8 boys falling in one after another

but one stood out to you; he always did 

ya’ll just stared at each other, unsure of what to say, when the rest of the boys took the hint and left the apartment

“so ummm...” you trail off, not knowing what to say now that you were cooled down with 99% of your brain back to rationality

but before you could start overthinking, minho interrupts and just starts off ranting

“im so sorry baby i swear i didn’t know she felt that way about me and also i didn’t mean to forget about you it’s just that i hadn’t seen her in a long time and she was my best friend since i was a kid and i really feel like i’ve ruined things but like i really don’t want you to leave me and-”

this boy wasn’t stopping even for a damn breath

so you did the first thing that came to your mind

you smacked his head 

i bet yall thought i was gonna say kiss him but nAh fam 

he let out a small ‘ouch’ but it got him to shut up 

“i understand now.... i’m really sorry for leaving without listening to your explanation. and don’t be silly i’ll never hate you. you provide me with way too much entertainment” you say and shoot him a cheeky smile

he rolls his eyes and crushes you in a hug, relieved that you will still remain his 

just then he realised something

“did you just smack my head to get me to shut up”

you laugh nervously and slowly try to get away from his grip when his hands shoot to your sides and start tickling you

you scream-laugh and try to get away from him but somehow you just end up dragging him onto the floor 

he was hovering above you still tickling you when you grabbed his hands to stop him

both of ya’ll breathing heavily from laughing too hard 

and he just stares at you with this soft smile because he still can’t believe how he scored someone like you

cue the same thoughts racing through your head

and this is where he actually leans in and kisses you softly because why not

ya’ll were really the cutest couple out there

the boys slowly open the apartment door, afraid that you had killed minho or something because you were known for your scariness when you were angry

and they see ya’ll having this soft moment and they just have different reactions in general

most of them either aww-ed or gagged

but jisung, being an idiot, walked over and kicked minho off of you and shot him the best brotherly glare he could muster 

which wasn’t really a glare 

was more like a squirrel trying to look upset

which is really cute

but anyways yes

“you pull this shit one more time and i’m gonna...i’m gonna...uhm.. idK what i’ll do but you watch your back” he said as he narrows his eyes and shows minho a ‘i’m watching you’ sign with his fingers

you stare at jisung and wonder how you were related to that... thing that clearly had no more than one brain cell

minho pretended to be scared to humour jisung and raised both his hands in surrender

“yes boss”

and that’s how you and minho have a prospering relationship, with more understanding, lesser fights, and 8 other third-wheels (or eight-wheels)

∞ end ∞

[astros-turf]

Kpop Tag Game

Rules: List 10 biases not in the same group then tag 10 people. 

Tagged by @b-ace

Thanks for the tag yo, this is gonna be tough lol

1. Rocky - ASTRO

2. Yongguk - BAP

3. Jackson - Got7

4. Chan - Stray Kids

5. Jian - IMFACT

6. Jun - A.C.E.

7. Shownu - Monsta X

8. Chanyeol - EXO

9. Hui - Pentagon

10. Seungkwan - Seventeen

(ahhhh, 10 of my favorite dumbasses...)

2. Ultimate Bias

So, UB would have to be Rocky. Love that lil soff pebble.

3. Ultimate Bias Wrecker

So I don’t have bias wreckers, but my 2nd bias would be Yongguk... (and no, the above list isn’t in love order XD i just always list these two first ok??) I think out of all my biases he’s the one I was weak for the fastest... was sent one gif of his smile and literally demanded more immediately.

4. Favorite kpop song

HAHAHAHAHHAH right. yeah. Ok. Lemme just... I have.... playlist after playlist of favorites ok? That’s impossible. I’ll just follow @b-ace‘s method & tell you that the last song that was stuck in my head (and has been there for days? weeks?) is I am YOU - Stray Kids

5. First kpop song

Oh shit uh..... I.... huh. I feel like the first one I remember watching a mv for was Spring Day by BTS? I know it was BTS something.... If it wasn’t Spring Day I’d be surprised lol...

However!! I’ll tell ya later which song actually got me into kpop ^-^ (cuz BTS are cool and all but... they’re not why I like kpop)

6. Favorite kpop album/single

Yikes uh *glances at shelf of kpop albums* right... *glances at spotify playlists* yeah.... uh. I mean honestly, it may be Dream pt. 1 by ASTRO? Dream pt. 1 was my first comeback with a group? & I bought both versions of the album cuz new interest... and also cuz I got one of the versions signed & just... yee. Nothing like the beginning of an interest :)

7. Favorite kpop ship

Favourite Brotp/Idol friendship would have to be Minseok & Jongdae. They’re just so f*cking adorable man…Minho & Kibum too! Both adorable. So Soft man lol <<< YEE. I agree & same here so just gonna leave that there lol

8. Hard or soft fan

Soft. 100% Soft. Give me all the smiley, giggly, cuddly, soft content please and thank. <<< same lol.

9. Favorite kpop company

None. They’re all snakes. Can’t trust any of ‘em. <<< okay joon lol I’m just... yup.

10. Backstory of how you got into kpop

Right. So after being shown Spring Day and a bunch of other BTS and I think EXO & other groups/songs/etc... my friend was like “I think I know a group you’ll like.” & showed me Confession by ASTRO. I think I made it to the about... eh, 2 minute mark?? (should be right after R O C K Y’s first rap lol) before I decided, “Yup. Time to devote my life to these 6 cute idiots..... but especially this one with the smiles” & uh yeah, the rest, as they say, is history.

Tagging: uh, whoever wants to just tag me so I can see!

[taesthetes]

Hey I just need to get something off my chest and idk why I’m dumping this all on u but u seem like the nicest person on tumblr that I know but if ur uncomfortable or anything pls feel free to look over this. Lately I’ve been trying to stay away from bts and the fandom bc I feel like it’s toxic for me. It’s not like where I listen to them and follow them and obsess on a religious level but I feel like I’m more occupied w them than I should be. 1/?

After all they’re all just humans who get tired and lonely and miserable and aren’t perfect, yet we idolize them and depend on them for our happiness. Of course we should support them, but it’s to the point where it’s frickin ridiculous, like nothing exists without bts, u know what I mean? 2/?

And I’m at the point of life where t depends on me to make my own decisions and make choices that will shape my future, and I really don’t want to look back and regret wasting time watching videos and thinking about things that will essentially have no impact on my life. What I like about bts is that they seem to have a deeper motive behind just simple Kpop, but I think I’ve taken that too far to an extent where it’s become my excuse. 3/?

Bts are seven people who have worked hard to deserve recognition and truly deserve it, but they’re also seven men who have separate lives from me that I have nothing to do with. They’re people that I’ve never even met and I don’t know tbh, we only see the filtered and edited sides of them. It just feels wrong to look at the packaged versions of them and expect them to live up to my expectations or fantasies. 4/?

There’s also the aspect that they’re kpop idols, as in regardless of how different and unique they may be, they’re still going to follow the formula and act like idols who are polished and made as perfect as possible. The whole industry is based on us going crazy over their looks and dance and singing and whatever, and it’s so messed up to me that we r supposed to like them for something so superficial and in genuine. 5/?

Idk if I’m making a lot of sense rn. I just don’t think it’s right of me to force them into a mold that I’ve created in my mind and then get disappointed when they don’t comply, and expect them to be something different when this whole time, even I’ve been idolizing them based on their appearance and talents. 6/?

And then there’s the fandom, filled with a variety of people from all different backgrounds, races, ages, genders, etc. and while it’s cool to have something in common with someone, I’m just tired of having army be the only thing that defines me. When I meet someone that likes bts, it’s as if I personally don’t matter, like it doesn’t matter if I killed someone as long as I like bts. 7/?

I don’t know how to phrase this … the diversity and tolerance is amazing, but at the same time, I’d like more genuine friendships than fangirling over someone’s biceps and thighs u know. Lately I’ve been kind of falling out of listening to bts and stuff, but I find myself continuously going on social media so I can keep up with them in habit, more than being interested. I deleted Twitter and unfollowed all bts accounts on insta and tumblr, but without it I feel like I’m missing something 8/?

It’s just a cycle of me trying to discipline myself, not being able to do it, and getting sick of myself for being so pathetic. Even with fanfic, ur writing for example is literally better than like an average author, but I feel so stupid to fantasize about someone without even knowing them first. I don’t have a problem with fanfic, it’s more like I have a problem with myself reading fanfics. 9/?

I know most of my problems lie with myself, not bts or the fandom, so that’s why I’ve tried to bottle it up and pass it on but it’s really making me miserable. I know going to a fanfic author who I don’t know personally may not be the best idea, so pls don’t feel pressured by this message to do anything or say something. I think writing out my feelings and venting has made me feel a little better. 10/11

So I’m really really sorry for forcing this on you, and don’t feel obligated to do anything!! Thank u for ur amazing writing like always, and have a restful and amazing day!!! 11/11

hi, honey bee, it’s totally okay to talk to me about anything you want and also, you’re incredibly sweet for thinking that i’m the nicest person on here, thank you :’) but i really understand how you feel towards the whole fandom and bts.

yes, bts are just humans who get tired and lonely and miserable and aren’t perfect, but rather than idolizing them, it’s perfectly okay to like them for who they are as people and for the music they produce. it’s okay to appreciate someone for the work they do, like how we enjoy artwork and appreciate the artist for creating them or how we like the flowers planted in the park and appreciate the gardener for planting them.

i wouldn’t say that my happiness depends completely on them, but they do make up a little part of it because their music makes me happy. and music is supposed to make you feel things. their funny videos can make you happy, and that’s okay, too. i see stanning bts as a hobby i enjoy at times, not as my only source of happiness, because there’s so much more that makes me happy, like flowers, food, art, etc. however, depending on one thing for happiness is unhealthy, so i do agree that an obsession with bts is bad. there’s nothing wrong with supporting them, but yes, having a mindset that only bts exists is unhealthy. i just found this post that better explains how stanning a group is good and bad through the psychological point of view, and it’s pretty interesting! :D

i don’t think you’re wasting time watching videos of them. if they made you happy at the time, if they made you laugh when you were sad, then it was worth it. unless you’re choosing to watch videos 24/7 and neglecting your family, friends, academics, job, health, etc. then i don’t think it’s necessarily bad that you’re watching videos. it’s like watching your favorite tv shows or playing sports. it’s just another hobby. it has an impact on your life because it makes you happier.

i do understand your concern though as you move into a new chapter of your life. personally, i’m not as into them as i once was back in high school anymore. i did spend a good deal of time writing and posting a fic about them once a week. it really changed when i went to college though since my priorities and time commitments changed. i think you might be more occupied with them when there isn’t something else to fill that aspect in your life if that makes sense? i wasn’t particularly academically simulated in high school, so i had a lot of time on my hands even after spending time with friends and doing clubs. i got into kpop because that’s something easily accessible and it’s entertaining. but with the freedom that comes with college and harder classes, my time is filled more with going out with friends, studying, painting, spending time with my roommates, etc. and bts got less of my time.

yes, bts are people with separate lives who you may never meet, but that doesn’t mean you can’t appreciate and like them for what they do. and, they might not show everything about themselves to the public, but we can learn from the good examples they do show, such as their UNICEF work and lyrics that talk about more than just romantic love. i personally think that most of what they show is genuine, but there is a line to be drawn between enjoying the work they do and believing they are gods. but yes, i do get that their personas to the public can be fake, which is a bit /: because yeah, there are people who are in love with them and dedicate their lives to them, but we really don’t know who bts actually are.

i think, rather than idolizing them, it’s better to see them as humans and as people just like us. that tends to take away any fantasies or expectations i have of them. yes, they are kpop idols, and that’s their job. they’re just working to make a living doing what they love. yes, the industry is built upon the fans, but it’s like that with any music artist or celebrity. i think it’s okay to like bts, but not to the point where your love for them surpasses the love you have for people who are actually in your life.

and you’re making sense, don’t worry! i hope my answer makes sense, too. i think every fan goes through where you’re at right now. i had felt that way about bts and exo before, but i moved on from that and now see them as people whom i appreciate. it was just a process for me, but i think it has to do with me filling my time with other things and spending time with people i thought were more important, and my love for kpop is now just something that brightens my day a bit if i ever need it.

some fans can be very… enthusiastic, but that might just be because they don’t have anyone else to talk to about bts. but yes, i get what you’re talking about. sometimes, it’s exhausting to just talk about one thing all the time and be seen as just a bts fan, and not as your own person. but even myself, i think it’s exciting to find someone else that listens to kpop since for me, there aren’t that many people around me who do. but after the initial excitement, i’ve made many friends through our mutual love for bts. as friendships grow, we talk about other interests we have and other things we like, so we don’t always talk about kpop. many of my friendships started from a mutual interest, whether it be bts or art or a mutual dislike for a teacher or class subject haha, but it grows from there as we talk about other things and get to know each other.

it’s fun to have someone to talk about comebacks and mv’s with, but yeah, i get that there’s more to talk about. maybe you can try introducing a new topic? or going out with friends who don’t listen to bts? and hey, we can be friends if you want :D you can talk to me about your day, your favorite foods, your favorite tv shows, any pets if you have them, anything else you want! i haven’t listened to bts for a while now either, i only follow their official account on instagram, and i don’t check my tumblr for days, even months during the school year. i don’t think you have to cut them out entirely to the point where you feel like something is missing. but if you are no longer interested in them, do you have any hobbies you can use to fill up that missing feeling? maybe baking or cooking? drawing? going out with friends?

and you are not pathetic!!! you don’t have to cut off something entirely at once. it takes time, but you’ll get there. and omg alsjdhflaksdhfd thank you for saying that about my writing :’) and there’s nothing wrong with reading fanfiction! please don’t feel bad for reading it. fanfictions are just like any other stories out there, except you already have a face and a name for some characters. i personally don’t read them for the idols featured; i read them because the writing is so much better and there are so many more interesting concepts involved in fics than in books i can get from the library. 

and please don’t keep your feelings bottled up and be miserable ): you can always come talk to me if you ever feel this way. and if you have one, we can swap kakaotalk id’s if you want to talk since it might be easier to text that way :) or you can send in more asks! it’s always good to talk about your feelings, even if it isn’t comfortable at first. even if it’s not me who you talk to in the future, i hope you are able to share your feelings with someone else and not keep everything inside. you deserve to feel happy. and i’m happy to hear that you’re feeling a little better! you’re always welcome to vent into my inbox (or you can direct message me; i have it turned off for those i don’t follow, but if you send me an ask with your url, i can message you first, so we can talk that way, too, if you want!)

you don’t have to apologize; i’m just very glad that you’re feeling at least a little better now! i understand that there’s a struggle that comes when you’re dealing with something that’s been a part of your life for so long. your feelings are valid, and i have definitely felt this way before, and it’s always good to talk it out or have someone listening. and thank you so much for liking and reading my writing, sweetpea 💕 i hope you have a lovely and relaxing day as well! i hope you’re doing good, and you’re still feeling better today, honey bee 🌻💘

[jaeyooniverse]

Fantasy friend here ❤️ hope you're doing alright!

I was working on a personal project 😊 I like to write stories and I've been trying to get some creative work done every day (or at least most days sfdhsjgfshsg)

Ah I'm '98 line! Foiled by the progression of time 😔 but thank you, you seem like a really fun person too and I bet being your sibling would be super cool 💖

I'll definitely keep your recommendations in mind when I'm next choosing what album to listen through! Usually I start considering myself "a fan" of a group once I've seen all their music videos and listened to enough b-sides to make sure I like their music beyond just the title tracks, and have also gotten kind of familiar with the members' personalities - I feel like in k-pop there tends to be so much emphasis placed on knowing about the members that that aspect seems almost as important as the music/performance side of things, which is an interesting phenomenon, but I do think the music is the main draw of a group.

Tbh every Fantasy I know is just constantly 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 when it comes to Youngbin 😂 there's just something so endearing about him... all the members seem like super cool people though, they all have their own special charms! And yeah I think Chani would be really fun to hang out with - there are some idols who I look at and go "I want to be their friend" and at least half of SF9 is on that list lmao

Yeah with less songs I guess you have to stick with a theme, at least to a certain degree. A lot of it depends on the length of the album I think, like with 7 songs you have room for more variety than you would with 4 - that's one reason I like longer albums, there's just more space to include different types of tracks 😌 (except rpm because that album is so well put together!!! there's no need to add on to something that's already perfect)

That's fair lol, I like a wide variety of concepts as well - I love when there are some rock/punk elements added into the music so if they experimented with that I think it would be really cool, and I'd like to see them try a softer concept because I feel like they're versatile enough to pull it off, but I'm not going to nitpick if they decide to just keep doing what they're doing 😄

What would you say your favorite friendship in SF9 is? Are there any members you would like to see work together on a side-project song?

hiii ^^

oh nice! and that sounds like a nice little goal to have everyday. what do you like writing about?

aww man 😭 but hey that means you can have an big sis now 😁����

that makes sense! i don't think there's any group i stan that i havent seen all the mvs for at least lol but yeah honestly depending on how much music a group has out it could take a while before you listen to everything, and it's not like you have to hear everything to be able to say you like someones music. I dont really get people who say they stan a group but then don't like most of the groups music?? how does that work skhsksh but yeah i think that bridge between casual listening & stanning is getting to know the members. it is an interesting thing, how much the kpop stanning experience revolves around the members being relatable, entertaining, and accessible in some way. maybe thats how it is stanning other music artists too I wouldn't really know since I've only really stanned kpop groups 😅

youngbin is sooo endearing and you see it in pretty much all his interactions with the members and ugh the way he'll smile at them I just 🥺🥺🥺🥺

lolll same I would pretty much hang out with all of them! tho i feel like some members i would be really awkward with if it was just the two of us? 💀💀 unsurprisingly i think the member i'd wanna hang out with the most is jaeyoon skgsksh and youngbin :D

yes exactly my thoughts! like if you have such a short album and the songs don't fit some sort of concept/theme/vibe it just feels like you took a bunch of songs and threw them together, which i dont think is how albums should be.

oohh yes that would be cool to hear! i hope they explore those genres, then! oooh I am curious to see how sf9 would do a soft concept. i feel like the softest thing theyve done was probably for the so beautiful mv and that was so long ago 😂

oohh favorite friendship theres so many 😭 my first thought was youngbin & jaeyoon skgsksh i love them 🥺 but also hwiyoung & chani, hwiyoung & jaeyoon, and inseong & dawon ! oh and taeyang & hwi, taeyang & jaeyoon... there's so many pairings whose interactions i love it's hard to choose lolll do you have a favorite?

i was actually just thinking about this last night! jaeyoon and zuho have already blessed us several times but I kinda want zuho to make a track with dawon 😁😁 what about you?

also i meant to ask, what time zone are you in? i'm in EST 😙

[survivor-tierradelfuego]

Ep. 11: “Do you all think I am just floating over here with no one?” - Aimee

Amy A

Ben ☹️. I didn’t play too well with him and it was such a good blindside I couldn’t resist. I wish him well and I just have a feeling I’m next to go 

Olivia A

Okay umm we got Ben out but it turns out Kalle gave me a real idol? So I feel weird. The reason we began suspecting her of lying was because Hanuha people knew about Maddison’s safety without power advantage and Kalle was literally the only person who could’ve told them. IDK!!

Aimee

I’m just so tired of crying! Sarah tried to video chat and I just couldn’t. No one knew I don’t think that Ben and I were so close. Gaaaaah I’m gonna miss him so much! He just helped me so much to stay sane in this game. The last thing I need is anyone seeing me as a big hot mess. I can’t catch a break. 

Sarah

From two nights ago.... https://youtu.be/uebz8rVKNbg https://youtu.be/xQyiuiGeEpo

Pedro A

when i actually thought i was at the bottom........THERES EVEN A LOWER BOTTOM...THAT IM IN RIGHT NOW......chille ben screwed us BIG TIME....we were in a great spot..i dont even know what to say at this point

Sarah

Wow. Okay. I didn’t want to be a villain but here we are. I will post a video confessional soon but for now, the plan to vote out Ben actually worked. I called Maddison last minute and explained that Ben and Kalle were tight and were all over the place, playing both sides. Maddison found out that Kalle was a rat and was not being completely truthful and we both agreed on voting Kalle or Ben. We agreed on Ben because we thought Kalle was going to play her idol on herself.... turns out Ben was telling the truth in voting out Kalle to old Hanuha and Kalle actually gave Olivia a real idol. More to come... but for now I feel like a villain ahhh. 

Kalle N.

Well I said that my only goal was to make jury and not go to the FTC so it looks like Ben really helped me achieve that. THAT FOOL REALLY FUCKED ME OVER ON HIS WAY OUT THE DOOR. This is fine. I will never let him forget that I've beaten him twice now and that's all that matters. Did not see this tribal coming at all. Can't wait to get voted out next

Najwah

If I learned anything today is that we tend to read in and over think and make up scenarios in our head. Ben was actually on our side all along? Who would have thought. All the bits and pieces he told us today just didn't add up and Cody said he was different and everyone was just quiet and Ben didn't talk in the group, he spoke to people individually. I don't really understand what just happened but we wasted so much energy speculating lmao. And now where the hell do we go from here? Cody has become so paranoid also. The minute Ben told him that those people will be writing his name he became soooo paranoid wtf. Then he WASTED an advantage and idol at tribal? Just bc he still didn't trust the plan. I'm starting to think that Cody just can't trust anyone or any process. I really think he needs to chill more. Be more low key. Just try to be calm. If you get voted out, it's not like you're going to die or something. It's just a game after all. 

Aimee

Apparently tribe was getting too suspicious of how Ben and Kalle were so close. I still don’t get why I had to be left out of the vote though? Why can’t I get the respect to be told what is happening before the vote, so I have time to process my emotions and have my stuff together a little. https://immunityilol.tumblr.com/post/617448854807298048 Instead I get nothing. I get a call from Sarah right after Ben is voted out. Obviously I can’t answer it because I’m crying and no one knew I was super close to Ben. I’m just so angry right now first Grae now Ben! IS MADDISON NEXT!? FUCK! Like Gah I’m afraid to get close to anyone. But I just love getting to know people. I finally got to video chat with Maddison. Fucking loved it! She is great to talk to and great to have on this crazy skype isolation island. I need some interaction and realness right now. Ok I’m totally drinking. It’s hard enough to process all this nonsense sober. We will see what the next day brings. 

Aimee

Sarah I really don’t want us to end up like this Casanova music video. 😢💔 I guess everyone wants to blindside Aimee as a treat. I hope people got their jollies out of it. 🌟 Allie X - Casanova feat VÉRITÉ https://youtu.be/YpVunjboAWg

Sarah

From last night.... https://youtu.be/EirlyVVXDKk

Sarah

Day 21 https://youtu.be/aYiGStuSKDA

Pedro A

Im afraid Kalle will throw me under the bus...just to stay this week cause shes on the bottom....and im also afraid that maddison and olivia will try to convince kalle to vote me out...instead ....since they are coming for me ...GOSHHH..i hate my life...i need immunity...CAN I LIKE HAVE IT?

Pedro A

okay so im excited to see everyone's answers to this challenge...THIS WILL BE INTERESTING...it will reveal a lot of people real thoughts ..IM READY FOR TEAAAA YALL

Najwah

I enjoyed my day today. I think it's the first time I was fully in the real world in 22 days. I'm playing a reckless game right now. There are so many layers in this game but after last night's tribal and learning that Ben was being legit, I just feel bad. I love Cody but he's definitely a loose cannon and can't play low key. Which is definitely bad for my game. He and Sarah are trying to push me into getting Amy on our side, but our relationship just isn't like that. I don't want to make her feel used. I like her. I really like her a lot. I like Sarah too. And Cody. I want to be friends with all these people IRL lol so I don't want to play against them or lie to them. This game just gets harder every time someone gets voted off tbh but I'm at the point where I feel like "if my plan works, then great", "if it doesn't, then whatever. I get to chill on panderosa and get to sleep more and actually spend time with my family and friends who I've been avoiding since this started lmao" Also, I'd be able to work again. I haven't got much work done urgh. I don't know whether my super idol is real. I'm curious to see what tonight's challenge will reveal. I am not going in with any syrategy

Cody wants to go for Kalle and Pedro coz they voted for him? I don't know, I think that's kinda silly and I'm not about revenge. You have to think rationally. And we have made a few irrational choices of late because people read into things. I still wish Ben hadn't told Cody that everyone was voting for him. That's how so much of yesterday's shit started. I have been so tired since yesterday. Tired of the scheming and overthinking and being paranoid over nothing urgh. Aimee also wants to call me after the challenge. I'm kinda scared tbh. I had a dream last night that Aimee killed me lmao this game is haunting me and giving me nightmares. Honestly, I'd be okay if anyone left wins this game. Okay except Kalle. She's the only one I've not interacted with and she just seems dodge idk. Maybe I'm still thinking about Zack's stupid analysis on people. Anyways. 

Najwah

I'm happy for Maddison tbh. She deserved that. I just want to scream about Cody though? Why did Cody chop Aimee? Wtf. And that made Aimee chop Sarah before she chopped Amy or Maddison. I'm so confused. Ugh. 

Maddison

Apparently I don’t know much about this tribe. Yeet!

Pedro A

Villan of the season?....im honored...but bitter jury?...i didnt like that one..lol

Aimee

I chopped Pedro for Grae. 

I chopped Olivia and haha sorry I got so nervous on here that I just chopped the final chop, even though that was savage as hell... I called her a goat and then chopped her right out of the game. Oops hahahahaha. When I watch this challenge back I look like the C word with a capital C.... And that word isn’t “cartwheel.” I chopped Sarah for the Ben blindside. I chopped Amy for my mental health. I can’t lose Maddison! I’m so sick of being tortured that I truly am running out of fucks tbh. Just chop anyone, whatever. Why do I care...

Aimee

Ohhhh Najwah!!!! Don’t worry about not telling me about the vote or accidentally calling me a goat because you didn’t know the meaning. I think I would make a cute goat. https://nunyabizni.tumblr.com/post/615593098008035328 Love that you think I’m actually “the Greatest of All Time.” I adore you and our friendship 💖❤️💞 luv you girl!!! I know you’re truly being genuine unlike others. I’m waiting for this game to tip in our favor so we can run with it. https://youtu.be/TGwZ7MNtBFU This MV is dedicated towards Najwah after Cody swooped in and stole my final 2 with her. No hard feelings; I have my own stuff to sort out after my man Ben was voted out. I’m pretty confident you have a final 2 with Cody and I love that for you. 🧡💛💚 I’m happy y’all got together and are strong with Sarah. But here I am. Do you all think I am just floating over here with no one? Just not playing the game and grazing my grass over here like a “goat?” They really don’t know how close I was with Ben and they got stupid lucky on that one. I’m not as clueless as you all think... it’s in your best interest to reconsider. Also let’s not skip over the fact that Sarah and I both didn’t get an answer on touchy subjects for “who do you trust the most.” Yeah don’t think I didn’t peep that. 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 Sarah didn’t put me and I didn’t put her. I put Maddison. Cody had 2 votes. Najwah and Sarah put him. I’m not dense. I guess Sarah is cool with being that 3rd wheel. Loving the fact that apparently no one has been seeing me reaching across the aisle for damn DAYS trying to play with Maddison.... oh honey, oh girl...oh no no ... that was just Ben right? Yeah. My final 2 with Ben is gone so I’m rogue and hoping I can get Maddison as far as possible with me. Also! Just letting you all know I’m not a damn chump. It’s SO OBVIOUS that Cody Najwah and Sarah have a fucking secret chat that they’ve been in since the beginning of all time, which included Zack. You’ve heard it here first folks. Oh and I’ve known this for at least a week or two. The tells are so blatant, but catch me pretending to have no idea. I’m not the goat that you think I am, but I would LOVE you to continue to think of me of a goat and forgettable. If you knew what I was doing I wouldn’t be allowed to get to the end. If I’m on any players radars then that means I am doing a bad job. So, I absolutely loved what this challenge revealed. I know way more than people think I know, but I am playing up the ditzy card hardcore. I would much rather prefer to be a stealthy sniper that people think is not playing. Give me a chance to explain my game in the final tribal and you might regret that. I have been doing all the same moves as Ben and same exact strategy.... he gets called a big threat and blindsided and yet here I am with identical strategy and totally left alone and tbh a little disrespected but that works to my advantage. Perception is not reality! This could be everyone’s biggest mistake and I honestly love it. I just want Kalle and Pedro out tbh. I got my big boobs and my positivity. I’m mind strong and I’m ready to get this. Your lady is never giving up. If you blindside me again it better be me that gets voted out. Otherwise you’re all in a world of fucking trouble... https://64.media.tumblr.com/0389c791f095d54973543b32d4414577/984582d2a107588c-89/s540x810/c10ec7b961de2fd3b693a886ea7385b04ed3d653.gifv

Najwah

I am still tired. LOL. Amy L still hasn't replied to me. I think she hates me right now and I burned the bridge with her, which I'm obviously sad about because it's the only bridge I really cared about? Like she's the only person who I was 100% sure about and we've always respected each others allegiance to their alliances. Anyway. What does it matter now? I'm going to let Cody and Sarah make a plan with this tribal scrambling. Oh Cody said the reason he chopped Aimees rope is because he didn't want her to win immunity again lmao so he rather chops someone in his own alliance wtf I can't get over that fatal mistake. That and playing the extra vote and idol😭😭 ugh and I think people assume I am his goat or something lmaooooo I absolutely adore Cody but I really hope he doesn't mess things up for himself. Sarah wants me to get coins for them to buy an immunity idol. Do I really want to waste 5 coins again on someone whose just going to get paranoid and play it? I don't know. I need to think on it. 

Aimee

Welp I finally told my first lie in this game and hopefully it’s not my demise. I guess it’s my turn to be messy. I’m still coping with Ben being gone. 💔😢😫 Why the nut, did I tell Pedro I want him here. It was definitely too much alcohol and worried if he had another idol I would be the throw vote. Welp we will see if he throws that info all over the island. https://64.media.tumblr.com/d9f98e355c7e9229777fa982551cfd7e/tumblr_nr72mkoPHr1rs8h9do7_250.gifv https://64.media.tumblr.com/d37a2b6f76f83c1beaca2ca2bac6bb72/tumblr_nr72mkoPHr1rs8h9do3_250.gifv I’ve made peace with it though. This lady ain’t stopping, but if this puts me in jury. I’m honestly excited! I’ll finally get to talk to James, Grae and Ben again! And that makes my heart warm. ♥️ 

Pedro A

I'm probably going home tonight....kinda done with this.....I'm exhausted and emotionally drained from this experience.. I just wanna chill...at the end of the day its either me or kalle....so may the odds be in my favor!!

Najwah

I'm nervous about this vote. Apparently Maddison and co are willing to work with us to get Kalle out. I don't know how legit it is but I'm tired tonight and I just think I should do an early vote before people change their minds. 

Amy A.

So we had the game yesterday and there was a question about ‘closest Ally’ and no one chose me. I’m not really bothered about everyone else except NAJWAH. She didn’t choose me! I was the only one who chose her cos her name came just ONCE. Whoever she ended up choosing as her closest ally didn’t even choose her. It’s made me real life sad because I trusted her so much. Honestly, I didn’t even think twice about putting her name down for closest ally. I haven’t even spoken to anyone about tonight’s vote. Idk who I’m voting for but I know it’s not her cos I promised her that. That’s the only reason. Maybe I’m the one going home. I don’t know. 

Maddison

Let’s hope for a straightforward vote tonight with no unforeseen twists!

Aimee

https://youtu.be/m4Z0RN_KhK0 A flow mobz - thrill over fear (feat. luna blake) Omg I couldn’t sleep last night and I just woke up being bitchy about Pedro. I don’t think he actually has anyone besides maybe Kalle. My walls are up and I just want this vote to work in my favor and be Kalle. I hope there are no hard feelings after this game. I just want to get to know everyone during all this covid madness and have some fun. 🌈

[toxic-suga]

1, 4, 10, 12, and 13 for the BTS ask thing! :)

Sorry sorry sorry this is like a week late but I never got the alert for an ask?? Tumblr why do you do this to me. But yeah, anyway, thank you for asking! So, here we go:

1.My BTS bias

Oh boy okay so like, it’s Yoongi. But it used to be Taehyung. But the 21st Century Girls comeback live stage murdered me and Yoongi shot me his stupid little gummy smile and- well, that’s when I started to stan Yoongi, the little shit. I’m sorry Tae. You’re still my number two. Namjoon is my solid number three, my bronze boy, and the rest- *eyes Hobi and Kookie* alright okay I’m a Bangtan ho but who isn’t alright rip

4. My favourite BTS MV

Oh…oh…shit, okay, well when I first got into BTS I was really in love with Boy In Luv? Tae’s growly voice was nice and it’s just- it’s nice. Then I discovered Save Me so…yeah, Save Me is my favorite. Honorable mentions is the whole I Need U/Run and everything else in that whole concept ‘cause it’s A+++

10. My favourite fandom joke

“My heart- my heart is- oh my god” I don’t know if that qualifies as a ‘fandom joke’ but a lot of my Hobi posts usually have that as a tag because that boy- fucking bias wrecking all my shit I can’t with him. Oh yeah, and the “I’ll sue you Min Yoongi!” that thing, I love it a lot. Congrats to her for getting married recently.

12. My favourite BTS friendship (within the group)

Um…Jungkook and Namjoon? Maybe? I just really love the fact that Kookie idolizes him so much and respects him and that he joined BigHit because of Namjoon and just- *clutches chest* I can’t with them. Jin and Jimin is nice too OH AND JIN AND KOOKIE. Age difference? What age difference? They’re all children. I love OT7 friendship okay, I love them all. Yoongi and Hoseok too- Sope oh my god it’s great and- okay yeah I love them, I love them all.

13. My favourite rapmon quote

*softly* don’t…

I can’t answer this. There’s so many good quotes. Namjoon is- Namjoon is an inspiration alright, he’s my role model, he’s a light in the darkness that you wish upon. But if I had to choose…the only thing coming to mind is during the relatively recent vlive where he was in his Ryan pajamas and he was talking about what his teacher said to him? With the trees and branches?

I had to go look it up and it’s long so bare with me, this is under a read more because it got…hella long:

[in Korean]

“I have a teacher who counsels me and helps me with what I feel. I call him Mr. Ju. I’m not sure if he’s watching this but he always tells me this. I go on and on because I have a lot on my mind. I talk for an hour at the cafe. The teacher listens to my stories, and when I ask, ‘Am I a weirdo? Am I thinking too many useless things?’ Some people say that I have too much on my mind for nothing and some people say that I’m immature, but my teacher told me this. There might be some people like me out there, so let me tell you this too.

“My teacher told me that having so many thoughts at the age of 23 is not weird. Since your thoughts put out branches and it hurts and makes you confused but you’ll be in your 30s one day. My teacher is in his 40s. When you’re in your 30s and 40s the branches will be pruned and become a very large tree. That consoled me a lot although it may not mean anything. I’m sure there are people like me out there. Having a lot on mind and thinking more about everything than others. Thinking that I’m the weird one. I think some of you might be like me. Consider it as branches of your young days, of a young tree. It will be an experience. Of course it will hurt. You’ll have to go through a lot and pruning will hurt. But after time, it will be a great tree. I hope that each of you could be a great tree. Trees have names. I’m not sure if they have meanings as well. As trees have names, I’m sure that you all have great names and meanings. I’d like to say this in English.

[in English]

“Okay, so I saw that there’s no subtitle for this, uh, replay and for the Wings behind I felt really sad about the song. Now I’m saying that, you know there are a lot of people who are watching this V and there are a lot of youth and young people who feel like, ya know, they’re stra– like the song, Am I Wrong, am I… “Am I too thoughtful, or am I having too many thoughts in my mind, too loud of uh, I mean too much chaos in my mind. Is… am I the only person who thinks like this?” Think too many times and again and again…really sometimes this way. And, ya know, but what I could see is that so many people in the word right now feel the same thing. I think that can be named after like ya know chaos or youth or many things. I just want to say that a teacher told me that, uh, you know in your 20s, you have so many thoughts that’s like branches in a tree. If my brain were a tree, there are so many branches. There’s sadness, there’s desperation, devastation…there’s happiness, hope, everything. But, uh, when you get old, it gets cut and, ya know, and when it gets the shape of a tree we have to feel pain and experience many things. For the time. But after that in your 30s and 40s, if you got so many branches in your 20s, and you feel sad and sometimes you get lost, like I said in the song, if you get lost, maybe you, some day you will finally be a really beautiful tree. In your 30s and 40s. I sometimes meet some really good and cool…I don’t know the word, but old people. They’ve got so…they’ve got the attitude, ya know, like they’ve experienced so many things. So…maybe one day we can have that. Some day.”

Okay that’s it. Now, why is this my favorite quote? Short answer, it’s not, but it is a quote that really hit home for me. Long answer…well, like Namjoon said, there are people out there in the word like him that question everything instead of others because, yeah, I’m not the most…thoughtful when it comes to other people but I’m always questioning my place in the universe, what it means to be here, why my actions really matter and if I should even do anything because I’m just an absent speck in the vastness of the universe so why do my actions and achievements really mean anything? It’s a very…existential crisis type of mindset and its…nice, I guess, to see that he has those thoughts to? But then the quote by his teacher is also…I can take solace in it? That yes things are really questionable and unsure right now but that I can look back on it when I’m older from a better place, thing’s like that I guess. I dunno, this got really introspective and deep (as with most things when we bring up any of Namjoon’s speeches, fuck) but shit man, I don’t know. I just love BTS so much and Namjoon…like I said before, Namjoon’s an inspiration. He’s a person worth striving for. Shit I’ve got all teared up I just love that man so much oh my god I should’ve just went with “you got no jams” jokingly like I was gonna in the beginning holy shit man. Also, sorry for taking like a week to respond to this again, I didn’t even notice it in my inbox rip.

[snobmushroom]

K-Pop Tag [100 questions]

Source: beulbangmon

Since English isn't my native language, I may have done mistakes, please be indulgent~

1. Who was the first kpop group you became a fan of? EXO 2. How did you find out about them them? Two friends of mine were always talking about it, so... they gave me some songs to check and here I am. 😁 3. What is the first kpop song you heard? Wolf, from EXO, ad right after, Overdose. I became really interested in K-Pop after watching this MV. 4. Who was your first bias? EXO's Sehun (actually, he was the first I was able to recognize...) 5. Are they still your bias now? Yes, but less. 6. How does your bias rank in your heart? Do you love them more than, say, ice-cream? Huh... higher than ice-cream, surely, but higher than chocolate... I don't know ! 7. How many kpop groups are you a fan of right now? Ok, first of all, what does « being fan » mean ? For me, it means follow a group, learn their names, watch their TV shows, not only listen to their music (the list would be endless)... with that, I'm fan of 13 groups (and interested in so much more!) 8. Who are they? 24K, 2NE1 (well, now it's a bit harder...), B.A.P, Block B, BIGBANG, BLACKPINK, BTS, EXO, GOT7, iKON, NCT, SHINee and Seventeen 9. Which group is your favourite? This question is really hard... Like, really ! It depends on the area, on the shows... I would say BTS... 10. How long have you been a kpop fan? I listen to K-Pop since two years, but I became a hardcore fan since july 2016. 11. Who is your ultimate bias? … I change almost every weeks... I really can't pick one, I don't rank them... 12. Which kpop couples/friendships do you ship the most? I love friendship between all Bangtan members, and I ship Baekyeol or Kaisoo (and Hunhan, before....) 13. Which company is your favourite? I don't really have one, but I really like YG groups and style. 14. In terms of looks, which group is the best? EXO 15. In terms of songs, which group is the best? BTS, 24K and Block B 16. In terms of dance, which group is the best? SHINee... I really enjoy the crazy vibe on their dances... 17. Which group would you prefer to be classmates with in real life? GOT7 18. Which group would you prefer to be drinking buddies with in real life? BIGBANG 19. Which group would you prefer to work with in real life? BTS have many ideas, I think it could be interesting 20. Who would you want as a best friend? BTS's V, cause I have a similar mind, a bit (ok, completely) crazy and out of touch. 21. Who would you want as a brother? Baehyun 22. Who would you want as a sister? I don't know girl's names... 23. Who would you want as a boyfriend/girlfriend? Huh... EXO's Chanyeol or SHINee's Minho 24. Who would you want as a friend with benefits? HAHAHA. Let's check out my bias list... 25. Who would you want as a husband/wife? Huh... No offense, but I'm not really pro-wedding... like, not my style. 26. What is your favourite drama? I didn't watch many... I really love Hwarang, even if it's not ended yet. 27. What is your favourite radio show? Radiostar, this is the only one I know 28. What is your favourite variety show? Weely Idol, and After School Club. 29. Who would you like to see on We Got Married? I don't watch We Got Married 30. Who would you like to see on Running Man? I would like to see EXO again. 31. Who would you like to see on Hello Baby? Don't watch 32. Who would you like to see on Weekly Idol? EXO or BTS (again). 33. Who is your favourite WGM couple? DO NOT WATCH 34. Who is your favourite Running Man member? Yoo JaeSuk 35. Which group did you like best on Hello Baby? DO NOT- 36. Which group do you like best on Weekly Idol? SHINee's episode (october 2016 ? maybe november...) was sooo funny ! 37. What is your all time favourite music video? Huh. That's hard. Fantastic Baby [BIGBANG] was awesome. Blood, Sweat and Tears [BTS] was really beautiful. And, of course, B.A.P's Skydive 'cause it was like a little movie. And all Block B's MV, cause damn, they're f*cking crazy ! 38. What is your all time favourite song?

Huh. Just one ? I can't choose. Here a selection : Nilili Mambo [Block B], HOLUP [BOBBY], FIRE [BTS], Save ME [BTS], Blood, Sweat and Tears [BTS], Run This [EXO], El Dorado [EXO], Miracles in december [EXO], If You [BIGBANG], Of All Days [GD & TOP], Good Boy [GD x Taeyang],  No Jam [GOT7], Mad City [NCT 127], Daddy [PSY] yeah I totally assume, At Dawn [Suga] for the lyrics that I totally understand.

39. What is the last show you watched? Golden Disk Awards, last week end

40. List 5 of your favourite groups and then fill in the questions below about them!  EXO BTS BIGBANG Seventeen NCT

Group 1 - EXO

41. How did you discover them? 

Like I said, I heard about them by a friend. 42. What was the first song that you heard? Wolf 43. What was the first music video that you watched?  Wolf 44. Who was your first bias? Sehun 45. Which is your favourite song? El Dorado and recently, Run This (all the japanese EP was good, tbh) 46. Which is your favourite music video? Coming Over, because I love the aesthetic... Sci-fi aesthetic. Lightsaber, for the same reason (and because the three of them are wonderful af in this MV!) 47. Is your bias the same as of now? Nope. I can't choose one in EXO, but I would say Chanyeol, for his voice and his personnality. I really enjoy Kai's dance, too. 48. Your favourite pairing/friendship? Baekyeol, as a friendship (I don't really ship couples), and after the ISAC... Woozi and Chanyeol (I'm sorry, I laughed so hard when I saw them together...!) 49. Which member is the funniest? Chen. Chen is one of my EXO's bias, by the way. And my favourite singer. 50. What is your favourite show they have guested/starred in? Starshow 360 and, of course, Showtime... 51. What is your favourite album? Love Me Right and Coming Over

Group 2 - BTS

52. How did you discover them?

Huh... Youtube recommendations I suppose. 53. What was the first song that you heard? I really don't remember... Jump ? Or Boy In Luv ? 54. What was the first music video that you watched?  Like 53 55. Who was your first bias? Suga... or Jungkook. I don't remember (once again) 56. Which is your favourite song? Blood, Sweat and Tears... 57. Which is your favourite music video? Blood, Sweat and Tears... 58. Is your bias the same as of now? Nope → V 59. Your favourite pairing/friendship? I don't have one 60. Which member is the funniest? V cause he's not... on the same planet as others Bangtan's members. 61. What is your favourite show they have guested/starred in? Weekly Idol 62. What is your favourite album? Wings

Group 3 - BIGBANG

63. How did you discover them? 

Youtube, when you search fo K-Pop they're almost the first to appear. 64. What was the first song that you heard? Fantastic Baby 65. What was the first music video that you watched?  Fantastic Baby 66. Who was your first bias? G-Dragon 67. Which is your favourite song? If You, FXXT It 68. Which is your favourite music video? Fantastic Baby (and  BANG BANG BANG) 69. Is your bias the same as of now? Nope : T.O.P 70. Your favourite pairing/friendship? Don't have one. But I love how Seungri interact with others (they like him, even if they REALLY don't show it) 71. Which member is the funniest? T.O.P 72. What is your favourite show they have guested/starred in? Happy Together (2015) 73. What is your favourite album?

MADE

Group 4 - Seventeen

74. How did you discover them? 

I heard about them and watched their performance at MelOn Awards 75. What was the first song that you heard? Nice 76. What was the first music video that you watched?  Check In 77. Who was your first bias? Mingyu (I saw him in the public at the MelOn... I watched their performance BECAUSE I saw him. I totally assume that I am like a fly attracted by beautiful visuals). 78. Which is your favourite song? MANSAE and NO FUN 79. Which is your favourite music video? MANSAE, and Boom Boom 80. Is your bias the same as of now? Nope, after watching a few shows, I choose Woozi... 81. Your favourite pairing/friendship? Not decided yet... There is so many of them ! 82. Which member is the funniest? Don't know... Woozi 83. What is your favourite show they have guested/starred in? Their pre-debut show (I don't remember the name) 84. What is your favourite album? Going Seventeen

Group 5 - NCT

85. How did you discover them? 

Memes... yeah... 86. What was the first song that you heard? The 7th sense 87. What was the first music video that you watched?  The 7th sense 88. Who was your first bias? Taeyong 89. Which is your favourite song? Mad City and Paradise 90. Which is your favourite music video? Taste the Feeling (I assume), and their new MV : Limitless. 91. Is your bias the same as of now? Yeah... with Winwin creeping 92. Your favourite pairing/friendship? Don't know 93. Which member is the funniest? Winwin, in his way... 94. What is your favourite show they have guested/starred in? All the NCT Life. They're still rookies, so I think they can improve their « variety sills ». 95. What is your favourite album? NCT127 (I didn't listen to Limitless still)

96. Who is your favourite actor? Don't know them 97. Who is your favourite actress? No, again 98. Do you create any fanwork (art/fiction/ect)? Nope. I'm not that talented ! 99. Favourite korean word? Huh... Don't know... 100. Any cool kpop-related anecdotes to tell? I converted my little sister to K-Pop by teaching her all my bias names and faces... even if she's only 10. niark niark (evil French laugh)

Tadam ! It took me time, but it was really funny to do...

Send me if you do the tag 😉 (well, I’m not a pro of tumblr but MP exists, don’t they ? 😂)

[seoschangbin]

hello!!! nice new icon omg💞gosh i'm sorry your final went terribly): hopefully you did better than expected!!! always remember that as long you did your best thats all that matters🙇🏻‍♀️but only one left!!! you got this rachel😌n hmmm well honestly i chose my major bc it was my last option. i don't really have anything i'm good at n most of the majors at my uni don't appeal to me. i speak spanish n love my language so i thought majoring in it can't be too bad😥wbu? what do you major in? -🎁💫

aah thank u!! i saw felix look all petty nd my brain went: gotta make him my icon 😌 hopefully! not sure when marks are gonna be released but 😭 no one’s fault but mine 😭 but thank u! good luck on ur finals as well! 

do u enjoy ur major at least! :o nd i major in microbiology + immunology! 

omg for real??!!😭💞gosh thats absolutely amazing!!! just makes me even More excited for skzs future!💞my fave skz track, man, the toughest q!😭when i first got into skz i was Obsessed with n/s... n i still LOVE it so i'd have to say its my fave! i really have been loving spread my wings lately too tho😌💗wbu??? n which title do you think is their best? get cool concept, CUTEST! hope we get more of that🥺first music show today!!! hope they get to promote more! yet... i do want em to rest😖-🎁💫 

me too!! i think they helped writing the intros to the albums so its like 😞💕 but me too!! felix always says that he’d become a songwriter if he wasn’t an idol like ! show me songwriter felix! also omg.. n/s is ur fav! i didn’t like it for a while but now im like.. gremlin rap in the word of jo 😌 but i lovee spread my wings as well! my fav is probably voices or you can stay (*basic*) but my fav title is side effects! do u have a fav title? me too... me wanting skz to rest vs. me wanting to see them more 🤙😔

miroh first win chan omg🥺🤲🏼honestly i don't normally like blonde on most idols for some reason (probably bc i'm a mega dark haired enthusiast🥺) but omg it suits chan so well. for sure miss the waves n the soft aussie surfer boy style!!💓hehe definitely agreed with light haired binnie!!! i'm ngl terrified of a possible platinum blonde binnie but idk i feel like he'd pull it off! either way i'm mega biased so i'm sure i'll love it if the day came🙇🏻‍♀️HIS SELFIES THOUGH... how we feeling-🎁💫

me too!! the aussie surfer boy rly just pops in chan 😫 honestly i dont know if he’d pull it off but i wanna SEE he’s cute anyways so 😣😣 his selfies r so cute i wanna cry every time his changbeekies !! 

what brought me into skz...🥺it was truly their music that pulled me in! i've been into kpop since 2016 n ulted another group before n skz just hit really different! when i got into them i got into their music first so when i first listened to them i had no idea how they looked like bc i didn't watch any MVs or anything! until i looked up lyric videos n i saw how sweet they seemed! then i watched some videos of em n they were just so charming! i couldn't resist💞wbu? how did it all begin! -🎁💫

oh which group before skz!! oh CUTE their music rly is what cemented it for me too + they’re so cute and the biggest sweeties 💕 mine was just my tumblr dash freaking about lil aussie felix nd i decided to give their show a go LOL 

gotta get onto this new content!!!😤💞i saw a clip of hyunjin smacking changbin's tush with a hammer on asc n god the way i lost it bc binnie was just sticking it all out with confidence djskjd. i mean embrace your beef my dude!!! n gosh any group with animals is so so so cute, most wholesome concept😭💞eee so you've been here since the beginning! thats so nice hehe, elite stay😌💓n tysm!!! i just have one more final sunday n then another one tuesday n i'm free!😎i hope you've been well!💞 -🎁💫

omg mdfkgj that video was so funny they’re so cute i love changjin 😭 our beefy beefcake.. yea. He! omg i kno!! that would be so wholesome their bunny episode was so cute but skz all seem to rly like dogs/cats so 😣 omg u know this blog was made october 2017 makgkja I CANT BELIEVE I’VE BEEN HERE FOR SO LONG 😭 they’re the first group i’ve been into from the beginning so its :’( so much content being released left n right we’re drowning 

also here are a few qs i've got bc i'm quite curious n a lil nosy!!!🙇🏻‍♀️how did binnie become your bias??? was he always your bias? got any fave binnie moments??? any bias wreckers? always nice to know the bias basics!!! feel free to gush!!!😚💕-🎁💫

hehe bin’s RAP it’s so good he’s prob my fav rapper!! when i heard him doing matroshyka i was Hooked 😭 hbu how did u choose chan as ur bias hehe! + SO Many binnie moments i’ll have to think of a list for next time + my wreckers are felix and hyunjin recently those 3 have the cutest friendship!