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chicgeekgirl89 · 3 years ago

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The Fifteen Minutes After

Fandom: 911 Lone Star

Characters: Carlos Reyes, T.K. Strand

Rating: EXTREMELY T

Summary: "It felt like a challenge. And the answer was no. Carlos absolutely could not handle whatever was going on right now, hence why they were about to walk into his home and do whatever it was you did with a one night stand you picked up at the bar."

A/N: "Yes, I recall the fifteen minutes after we met." Since we didn't get to see any of those fifteen minutes I have filled in the blanks. Episode tag for 1.01. Huge shoutout to @bluenet13 who basically deserves a co-writer credit at this point because I literally can’t post without her.

Read it on AO3

Captain Strand’s son was…not a good dancer. Carlos had to bite his lip to keep from laughing as he watched the other man attempt to shimmy and follow along with the steps. It was adorable. Incredibly, wonderfully adorable. And no matter how bad his hip shaking was, Carlos still found him incredibly attractive.

Also, he should probably introduce himself so he could stop referring to him as ‘Captain Strand’s Son’. “I’m Carlos, by the way,” he said as they turned to the left and then to the right.

“T.K.,” he said, flashing him a ridiculously cute smile.

T.K.? Well that was different. Carlos would have pegged him as more of a Ryan or a Chris, but T.K…he liked it. He liked him a lot.

“Does that stand for something?” he asked, kicking out his feet in time with the music.

“Yep.” T.K. gave him another sassy smile that said he would probably have to work to get the answer.

The dancers turned to face the back wall and Carlos turned with them. When he turned back he found T.K. checking out his ass. His eyes slid up to meet Carlos’ and he didn’t look in the least bit sorry to have been caught. “Like what you see?” Carlos asked, flashing a smile of his own.

Like what you see? Who the hell was he tonight? Carlos was a confident guy, but he wasn’t usually so cocky with people he’d just met. His mother had raised him with manners. All of which had apparently gone out the window the second he got an eyeful of T.K. Strand.

“Not bad,” T.K. said, his eyes full of laughter and…a little bit of desire? Maybe? Was Carlos reading that right? God, he’d been out of the dating game too long, he couldn’t even tell anymore.

“Not bad?” he repeated.

“You heard me,” T.K. said with a smirk.

Carlos felt himself growing tongue tied. Yet another thing that didn’t typically happen. He was a controlled guy. Confident. Not falling all over himself over a guy he’d known for all of five minutes. What the hell was wrong with him?

“It’s just kind of hard to tell,” T.K. said leaning close to him, “with your jeans on.”

If Carlos had been sipping a drink he would have choked. As it was he missed a step and nearly stumbled into the woman next to him. “Sorry,” he apologized as the song ended and the crowd shifted around him.

By the time he looked up again T.K. had moved back to the bar, but his eyes were still on Carlos, who found himself walking toward him as if pulled by a magnet, butterflies fluttering in his stomach. He absolutely had not come here tonight looking for a hookup. He’d just come to hang out with Michelle. He hadn’t even thought about the hot firefighter from the call earlier. And he definitely hadn’t been hoping he would see him again sometime.

He was halfway back to T.K. when his path was blocked by Michelle. “Hey you need a drink?”

“Uh, no, I’m good,” Carlos said, looking past her to where T.K. leaned against the bar top, a smirk all over his face, clearly having clocked the situation.

Michelle peered at him closely. “You okay? You look a little flushed.”

“What?” Carlos snapped his eyes back to her. “Yeah, yes, I’m fine. It’s just hot in here.”

His eyes found the bar again, but T.K. had disappeared and Carlos felt something akin to panic as he scanned the room trying to find him. Which was ridiculous. Because they didn’t even know each other. At all.

“You sure you’re okay? You’re acting strange,” Michelle said skeptically.

“I—yes.” Carlos caught a glimpse of T.K. headed out the front door. “I’ll be right back.”

Michelle called something after him but Carlos was already gone, pushing through the crowd to the front of the Honky Tonk.

The night air was cool against his burning cheeks as he searched the parking lot for T.K. “Well fancy meeting you out here,” said a voice to his left and Carlos pivoted to find T.K. sitting on top of the low porch railing that ran along the front of the building, half hidden in the shadows.

“Are you leaving?” Carlos asked, trying to keep his tone casual even as desperation filled him. He didn’t want this man to go. For a thousand reasons he couldn’t even explain.

“No, I was waiting for you,” T.K. said, taking a step forward.

Carlos’ breath left him in a rush and before he could even think he was moving, crashing into T.K., lips seeking, hands fumbling.

It was intense. T.K. tasted like spice and mint and a little bit of smoke. And Carlos wanted more. So, so much more. He was used to being the one in control, but T.K. met and matched his every move, parting his lips, hands sliding under his shirt, bodies bumping up against each other.

Carlos moved to T.K.’s neck and smiled when the other man let out a groan, his fingers fisting in the fabric of Carlos’ shirt. His hips bucked against Carlos’ and Carlos made an appreciative noise of his own.

His heart was pounding so hard in his chest it was almost painful but he couldn’t stop, didn’t want to stop. He just wanted more and more and more.

It wasn’t until he felt T.K.’s fingers on his belt buckle that a tiny sliver of reason managed to worm its way through the screaming haze of his libido. He pulled back just a little bit, his breathing so ragged it was like he’d just run a marathon. He felt almost dizzy with want and lust. “Wait, just, hold on,” he rasped.

T.K. made a noise that almost sounded like a whine, but he allowed Carlos to take a half step back. “We can’t—I’m a police officer, I can’t hookup with you out here like this.”

“Are you sure?” T.K. asked, lips finding Carlos’ earlobe and Carlos felt his resolve weaken so much his knees almost gave out.

“I—yeah. I mean your entire crew is inside.” Another thought struck him and his eyes grew wide. “Your dad is inside.”

“Maybe we should get out of here then,” T.K. said, his voice low and full of sex.

Yes, yes, that was a thing you could do, right? They didn’t have to stay here, they could go somewhere else. “My place or yours?” Carlos asked.

“Yours,” T.K. said immediately. He seemed to realize he’d spoken too quickly and looked a little bashful. “I uh, I currently live with my dad.”

Well that was fucking adorable. How could this man be so cute and so sexy at the same time? It didn’t seem possible.

“No shame in that,” Carlos said. “I lived with my parents until I graduated from the police academy.”

How had they gone from pawing at each other to such easy and practical conversation? Carlos felt like his head was spinning. T.K. smiled and adjusted his shirt so he looked slightly less rumpled. “Just uh, just give me a minute?”

“Yeah, sure, of course, take your time,” Carlos said immediately.

T.K. looked him up and down and let out a breath, pointing a finger at him. “Don’t go anywhere.”

He disappeared inside and Carlos took a second to try and unscramble his thoughts. He pulled out his phone and texted Michelle. Heading home. Headache.

Seconds later a text came back. Really? Okay. Feel better.

Of course she wouldn’t be suspicious. Because Carlos never took guys home. Ever. It was a rule. A big rule. Not something that he did. Until tonight. Apparently tonight he did. Oh god, what was he doing?

He was about three seconds away from hopping into the Camaro and driving away as fast and as far as he could when T.K. reappeared, all smiles, his hair still mussed from Carlos’ fingers just minutes before. “You good?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Carlos said. “Yeah let’s go.”

If Carlos had been worried about the twenty minute drive home and whether it would be awkward or a mood killer, he didn’t need to be. T.K. was charming and easy to talk to. He kept the conversation flowing so easily that Carlos felt like he’d known him for years rather than minutes.

“So you have any weird roommates I need to know about or anything?” T.K. asked as Carlos turned onto his street.

“No,” Carlos said. “No roommates. I live by myself.”

“Interesting. Are you sure I’m not a serial killer or something? Isn’t it a little dangerous for you to take me home like this?”

Carlos chuckled. “I’m a cop T.K.”

“Oh, so you think you can handle me?”

It felt like a challenge. And the answer was no. Carlos absolutely could not handle whatever was going on right now, hence why they were about to walk into his home and do whatever it was you did with a one night stand you picked up at the bar.

Carlos glanced over and looked him up and down. “I guess you’ll have to wait and find out.”

The butterflies were back as they walked through the front door. He was completely out of his depth and trying hard as hell not to let it show. He tried to remember everything Adriana and Francesca had told him in vivid, explicit detail about their own one night stands, but everything seemed to have left his brain except for T.K.

“Can I get you anything?” he asked as he turned to lock the front door. “Water or—”

Before he could finish, T.K. was on him, lips against his, hands in his hair, hard and hot and intense. And for all his nerves, now that the moment was here, Carlos didn’t hesitate, grabbing T.K.’s ass and pulling his hips into his own. It felt like his whole body was on fire. Appropriate since the man he was currently making out with was a firefighter.

It seemed like T.K.’s hands were touching him everywhere at once, tangling in his hair, gripping his waist, sliding across the planes of his chest and stomach, and Carlos couldn’t get enough of the way his fingers moved so tenderly across his skin.

Carlos’ own fingers were making quick work of the buttons on T.K.’s shirt. “Is this okay?” he managed to ask.

T.K. nodded, letting his head fall back against the wall, eyes closed, breathless as Carlos pressed a kiss to his chest for each button he undid. He was holding back a little bit, trying to gauge T.K.; what he liked, what he didn’t, although, so far, it seemed like T.K. pretty much liked everything. “My bedroom’s upstairs,” he mumbled against T.K.’s skin.

“Okay,” T.K. said, but he didn’t seem to be in a hurry to get there, grabbing Carlos’ face and lifting him so their mouths met once more.

His hands moved to Carlos’ belt and this time Carlos didn’t protest as T.K. undid the buckle and then moved onto Carlos’ jeans. He paused briefly, eyes meeting Carlos’. “Yeah?” he asked, searching for consent.

“Yeah,” Carlos replied and T.K. wasted no time undoing the button and the zipper, pushing his jeans down until they hung low on his hips.

Carlos wasn’t sure how they made it up the stairs without dying, both of them half undressed, falling all over each other. When they finally reached his bedroom he felt desire burn down his spine so hot and fast he could hardly stand it. He steered T.K. toward the bed by his hips and gently pushed him down. “Oh so that’s how it is?” T.K. asked with a laugh as Carlos pulled his shirt off.

“Yeah, that’s how it is,” Carlos said as he climbed onto the bed. “Do you think you can handle it?”

“I guess we’ll find out,” T.K. said with a grin.

Time seemed to slip away and before he knew it, it was the early hours of the morning. T.K. was up and pulling on his clothes. “You can stay, you know,” Carlos said, shifting in the bed. “If you want. It’s late.”

“You don’t do this a lot do you?” T.K. asked with a smile.

Carlos barked out a laugh. “Not really.”

Never would be more accurate, but T.K. didn’t need to know that.

“I gotta say I’m surprised. A guy like you,” T.K. let his eyes wander appreciatively over Carlos’ body, “I can’t believe everybody in that bar wasn’t trying to take you home.”

Warmth flooded through him. Was this bliss? It wasn’t love. For sure. You couldn’t fall in love after one heated make-out session and a couple hours of mind-blowingly good sex, right?

“I already called an Uber,” T.K. said. He sat down on the edge of the bed. “This was fun though. We should do it again sometime. Give me your phone, I’ll put in my number.”

Carlos reached for his nightstand but came up empty handed. “I think my phone’s in my pants downstairs.”

T.K. grinned, clearly remembering exactly how those pants had come off. “Do you have a pen?”

Carlos managed to find one and T.K. took it, then reached for Carlos’ hand, carefully writing down his cell number. “Don’t lose it,” he said with a smile.

Carlos would have it tattooed onto his skin if necessary.

T.K.’s phone buzzed and he looked down. “That’s my ride. No don’t get up,” he said when Carlos began to rise. “I’ll lock the door behind me.”

He leaned over and pressed one more burning kiss to Carlos’ lips. He turned when he got to the doorway, biting his lip and eyeing Carlos critically. “Very nice.”

“What?” Carlos asked in amused confusion, pushing himself up onto his elbows.

“Your ass. Now that I’ve seen it, I can say for sure, it’s very nice.”

T.K. grinned at him and then vanished down the stairs. Carlos snorted and shook his head. He wasn’t sure what the hell had just happened, but whatever it was, he’d liked it. A lot. And he really hoped they would do it again.

#911 Lone Star #911 LS #Tarlos #Carlos Reyes #T.K. Strand #It's not smut #But it's close #Lots of making out #And clothes coming off #But the private times stay private #Carlos is a sucker #And totally in love with T.K.#And T.K. is down for a good time

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ordinaryschmuck · 3 years ago

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What I Thought About "Yesterday's Lie" from The Owl House

Salutations, random people on the internet who absolutely won’t read this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons!

Here it is! The midseason finale of The Owl House Season Two! An episode featuring Luz going back to the human realm, is hyped up to heaven about how painful it'll be for the audience, and features more anxiety by how Creepy Luz is a thing. And BOOOOOOOOY howdy were fans not ready for this. I'm sure as hell not ready for when I wrote this intro at *checks time* thirty minutes before watching the official premier. Yup, the words you're reading right now are from me in the past, when everything was still pure and simple. Whereas future me is still probably destroyed by the events that transpired. Isn't that right, future me?

Future Me: Actually, it wasn’t that bad. The ending hurt, sure, but other than that, it wasn’t too painful.

Wow, that is some neat input! At least, I think it was. I wouldn't know because I literally wrote that after watching the episode. With the words you're currently reading being written at *checks time* twenty-six minutes before the premier...this whole intro is confusing, isn't it, future me?

Future Me: Sure is.

Yeah, it's definitely confusing. In any case, let's dive into this spoiler-filled review as we find out together just how painful this episode was! Take it away, future me!

Future Me: Will do! Major spoilers ahead, folks!

Now, let’s review, shall we?

WHAT I LIKED

Luz’s Room: We only see it for a short time, but everything about it just screams Luz. The pile of weird-looking stuffed animals, the witch hat in the center of the floor, and the fact that she has bunk beds, a single child's dream (Or so I've heard). It's a small thing, but I love it.

Vee: Here she is! The character previously dubbed Creepy Luz who now turns out to be yet another new addition to the ever-growing list of characters that we, as a fandom, would give our lives for. Because holy s**t was Vee the best type of expectation subversion. Showing us all the ominous ways of how she basically took Luz's place made fans assume that Vee was an evil doppelganger. Turns out, she was just a tortured soul that was desperate to live a new and better life and lucked out in finding Luz's. What Vee does is...questionable at best, but seeing what she went through with the experiments Belos pulled on her, you understand why she would do it. And I personally love it's that same background information that makes Vee resentful of Luz of all people. Luz's life is a relative dream come true, and running away from that would be insane to someone who spent most of their existence through imprisonment and experimentation. It's an intriguing point of view, even though it's admittingly flawed given how it's mostly Camila that seemingly made Luz's life bearable. But the flaws don't matter. What matters is that you can see where Vee is coming from, and to me, personally, I think she's understandable enough to make me root for her to have some kind of happy ending. Whether as Luz or as herself, I'm hopeful to see Vee get some semblance of peace.

Camila: *Round of applause* Don't mind me! Just taking the time to love how all them sons of b**hes who thought Camila was a bad mom are now heavily invalidated. 'Cause, guess what? Camila is a fantastic mother, both to her daughter and her daughter's doppelganger! Allow me to walk you through the highlights:

How Camila looks like she’s not okay with the fact that "Luz" is clearing out her weird stuff, seemingly acting too different to the Luz she knows. Added to the fact that Camila doesn't like it.

How Camila drove Luz to camp whether than letting her take the bus

The fact that Camila takes that box of junk back in, not willing to part with the tin foil sculpture Luz made.

The way she was willing to play along with the game she thought Luz was doing, supporting her daughter's creative mind that Camila admits to being glad to see.

And, best of all, the willingness Camila had to help this poor creature, despite the lies it lived.

It's that last part I really want to touch upon, though. Because an action like that shows just how much Luz's heart comes from Camila. The kindness and generosity of helping this poor creature, who she has every right to run out on, proves how Luz learned to be everything she is today through Camila's own loving heart. Vee was scared and hurt, and the second Camila saw that she was then more than willing to help because of it. It's something that Luz would do, and it proves that even though Camila didn't exactly get everything right, she's still a great mom where it counts.

“A new life”: A perfect line.

Initially, it makes audiences think that it has everything to do with replacing Luz. It's only through future context that we know it's about escaping the s**t show Vee once lived through that it's clear she's talking about starting over. It hits us with intrigue on the first viewing, only to hit harder with the feels during a second. Really well-done.

Luz in the Mirror: A well-done surprise that makes fans curious about how this even happen in the first place. Kudos to you, writers.

The New Portal: I don't mind that they found a way to build this off-screen. Showing Luz and the gang slowly building a new portal would have been a little too tedious to watch, and it's so much better to just start this episode out with it. Besides, maybe we'll get the slow and steadier version now that we've seen how quickly building one might not have been the best way to go, given how fast that thing fell apart.

Luz Between Dimensions: I have no clue what the hell that place she was in is called, but it's awesome! The overall design of the realm is the correct type of unsettling, like it's oozing with mystery, but it's somewhere that you probably don't want to be in for too long. Whoever designed it deserves all of the credit because I don't want to even think about all the hard work that went into making this look as well-made as it was.

Luz Resisting to See Amity: What? Luz and Amity are adorable, and seeing Luz's immediate thought about seeing Amity makes my shipping heart scream with glee. Don't judge me!

Hiding Luz’s Dad’s Face: Well, that was a fun story while it lasted.

So, it turns out that Luz's dad really was a part of Luz's and Camila's life at some point, but not anymore. As for why remains to be seen, as we don't really know yet if we'll see him make an appearance. I'd say that the odds are high that he will, given how much of a point this episode made about keeping his face hidden. Shows don't usually do that unless the goal is to hype up some official reveal, and I can't wait to see what comes of it.

Luz Telling Herself to Count to Five: Hey, more evidence for how I relate to Luz! I know how it feels to be all panicky about a specific situation, and I only got better when I took the time to calm down for a bit. Sometimes, I even tried the "count to x" method that Luz used...it never worked, primarily because it made me feel worse when people told me to do it, but I still tried it! Plus, there's also some narrative foreshadowing when after Luz says five, the realm shows her Vee, or Number V, which is a pretty cool detail you'll notice on a rewatch.

Luz Helping Vee: I gave Camila praise for helping Vee in the end, but that doesn't abstain Luz from her own set of recognition. The second that Luz realized that Vee wasn't really a threat and is far from evil, our favorite human does what she can to help and even makes a deal where they're both happy. Because, of course, Luz is that perfect of a protagonist who is more than willing to help others in need. And it's why we love her so.

Looking for Magic that Eda Left Behind: A pretty cool idea that gives Luz and Vee a chance to bond and giving us an insight into Eda's past antics and misadventures in the human realm. Not much I can add to it, though.

Gravesfield: It's surprisingly not as jarring as I thought it would be to spend an episode in the human realm. I thought for sure, after all that time in the Boiling Isles, there would be something off about walking around a normal environment for a change. Turns out, it's almost easy to get used to. Or, for me, it is.

But I will say that there's this neat use of colors when comparing Gravesfield with the Boiling Isles. In Gravesfield, the coloring looks dulled down and standard, which is a stark contrast to the bright vibrancy of everything we've seen in the Boiling Isles. It's a subtle way of showing how things are different, aside from the major discrepancies we could come to expect. And I think that's why I appreciate it much more.

Eda’s Called Herself Marylynn in the Human Realm: Hang on...hang on...do you mean to tell me that the crack theory about Eda being Stan's ex-wife is actually true?

...

...What even is this show?!

Vee Making Friends with Camp Members: This shows the most apparent difference between Luz and Vee. Where we see Luz is already fearing the many ways that could go wrong with interacting with teens, Vee revealed that she adapted to her situation and had a chance to make friends. The implications of this are worth discussing another time, but for now, I'll say that it's pretty intriguing that we gain this much insight into both Luz and Vee through such a small thing.

Belos Wanting to Learn How Basilisks can Drain Magic: ...Didn't Raine say that Belos was taking away magic? If so, I think we can figure out how he's doing it. The question now is: Why?

Jacob (The Curator Guy): This guy was a riot. At first, Jacob seemed like a threat with the way he trapped Vee and was apparently stocking her, but the second he goes off about his conspiracy theories, it becomes clear what type of character he is. And was it a blast seeing how much of a crackpot this man is. It wasn't cool seeing him wanting to dissect the precious angel that is Vee, but I still chuckle about things like his "Flat Eather's Certificate." So while he's not that much of a threat, he's still fun to watch.

The Owl Beast was in the Human Realm: ...How did that happen? When did it happen? And how the hell did Eda get out of a situation like that?! Who knows, but it's still a shocking piece of news to learn.

Luz Telling Camila the Truth: Hey, she faced her fear after all! Although, the results aren't as pleasant as when Amity faced her fear two weeks ago.

Camila is a Veterinarian: ...One insignificant reveal...managed to destroy so many fanfics. I mean, we probably shouldn't have just assumed Camila was a nurse...but what the f**k else were we supposed to think?! Sorry for seeing the scrubs, and the first thing that came to my mind was "nurse" and not "vet."

By the way, that had to have been intentional, right? There's no way that Dana Terrace didn't think we'd assume Camila was a nurse. She'd had to have put off a reveal like that just to trip up her fans. And if that's the case, then that is a major d**k move...but that's why I mildly respect it.

Two Human Brothers went to the Demon Realm: Turns out we don't have to be in the Boiling Isles to learn more about it. Because now we have more information about how two humans were taken to the Isles with the help of a witch, thus setting up a grander reveal if it turns out that one of the humans was Philip and the witch was Belos. Because if that's true...then there's more of a history between those two than we thought.

Jacob has a Training Wand: This helps me believe that it's highly likely for Jacob to make a return and to have a power boost for when he does. After all, focussing all that attention on the training wand is way too convenient for it not to come up again in the future. Meaning we're most likely going to get more pain from Jacob if he shows up again.

Camila Beats the Crap out of Jacob for Vee: ...Writers, don't make me choose between Camila and Eda on who's the better cartoon mom. I know Eda's technically not a mom...BUT I STILL DON'T WANT TO CHOOSE DAMNIT!

Also, the sandal...just...

Why the f**k does Camila have a sandal in her purse? I don't know. Is it still funny that she does? Most certainly.

Camila and Luz’s Talk in the Rain: Ooooooooh, I was not ready for this...

I wasn't ready for the crying.

I wasn't ready for the hurt in Camila's eyes when she found out Luz chose to stay in the Boiling Isles.

I wasn't ready for Camila asking if Luz hates being with her that much.

I wasn't ready for Luz profusely stating how it was never Camila's fault.

I was not ready for Camila to tell Luz that she'll try to do better.

And I definitely was not ready for Luz to barely have enough time to promise that she'll come back.

This episode wasn't the twenty-two minutes of nonstop angst that I thought it was going to be...but this short scene more than make up for it.

Luz Tries to Stay Strong: Yet another thing she unwittingly learned from Camila. Camila tried to keep a brave face when Vee was with her and Luz, most likely not wanting to tear either of them down in the process. Luz does the same thing here as she avoids talking about the details of what went down in her sort-of journey back home. And seeing her clearly fake smile slowly droop into an uncertain frown, it uh...it definitely tore me up inside.

WHAT I DISLIKED

I want to say it's perfect, but there's one major issue that really bogs this episode down.

Continuity Error in How Vee Replaced Luz: Having Vee take Luz's place the same day Luz appeared in the Isles is a smart idea on paper...if it wasn't for the fact that it's impossible.

Because Eda closed the portal door the second that she saw Luz, meaning that there's no way for Vee to go to the human realm. It's a major plothole that makes no sense, and it might just be the first time ever that this series wasn't so closely knit with its story. Which ends up taking a dive in quality in the process.

IN CONCLUSION

I'd say that "Yesterday's Lie" is an A-. Everything about Luz, Vee, and Camila is incredible, combined into a story that ends in tragedy and uncertainty for the future. That plothole may drag things down a bit, but everything else is handled so well that I'm not lying when I say it's easy to forgive and forget.

(And that's ten episodes in a row without a single stinker. HOW THE F**K DOES THIS SEASON KEEP WINNING?!)

#the owl house #the owl house spoilers #toh spoilers #luz noceda #camila noceda #camila is a good mom ok!#toh vee #emperor belos #what i thought about #the owl house reviews

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starbuck · 4 years ago

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All of Armitage’s Looks: Rated

Well, this was inevitable, wasn’t it? Being someone who very readily admits to having Armitage’s entire wardrobe memorized (and who will not apologize for how weird that is), I feel that I’m the perfect person to make this post, although perhaps not the most objective...

So, without further ado, allow me to present to you: every single one of Armitage’s Looks in chronological order: Rated.

#1 - Enjoying The Birthday -- 11/10

Unlike most named characters, Armitage does not appear until episode 4 but oh what an entrance it is... Look at that smile!!!! Actually, take an extra good look because you’ll never see it again.

Outfit-wise, this is just his normal steward uniform but I like those boots. Probably not unique to him but they’re very nice and remind me of a pair I own.

Bonus points for being the second person on the tackle-pile, following Tozer.

(You could accuse me of rating too high right off the bat, but look at his smiling face again and tell me I’m wrong.)

#2 - “Mr. Armitage, what do you report?” -- 8/10

And thus we are introduced to Armitage by name. Appropriately, he is partaking in his most consistent character-defining activity: protecting Tozer from harm (which, in this case, is the Not-Bear which has just come out of nowhere and ripped part of Heather’s skull off).

I’m gonna be honest: I don’t like how this style of coat looks when it’s fully buttoned-up. I think it’s awkward and boxy (see Gibson’s coat in the mutiny-planning scene at the beginning of ep 7 for a better idea of what I mean) and this is before Armitage figured out the belt trick that corrects the problem so I’m deducting points for the coat.

Luckily for him though, his hat is of my favorite variety in the show so I’m delighted to see it despite it just being his uniform. Also loving our first look at his blue sweater (peeking out beyond his coat-sleeves) and his gray gloves.

Further points added for this being the first of many scenes where he carries a gun, endlessly confusing the fandom at large about what the hell his job is.

#3 - tfw You’re Responsible For This -- 5/10

So I’m just gonna come right out and say that this is one of my favorite images of him in the entire show but, just as Look #1 was rated higher due to the context of the scene despite the outfit itself being average, this one’s rating, in turn, must suffer.

Things I love about this: the hat (obviously), the fact that the coat looks worlds better just because it’s slightly unbuttoned, the delicate dusting of snow, the way his face looks at this angle.

Things I don’t love about this: literally Everything Else.

Aiding in the racist kidnapping of an innocent woman and then not owning up to it twenty minutes after your introduction is not a good look, no matter how emotionally conflicted about it you are.

#4 - Who the Fuck is This Guy? -- 6/10

October 20th, 2019 was not the day that my obsession with Armitage began, but it was the day that I took a screenshot of this exact moment because I had no idea who this man was or why we were getting a close-up of him. It would take me two more months to figure his identity out.

But, to the point, not much to say here since it’s just his normal uniform again except that this is our first proper look at his hair which I absolutely adore. Also loving the little anchor buttons on his jacket - very cute!

Once again, points deducted for the unfortunate context.

#5 - Slops! -- 7/10

This look is noteworthy for a few reasons. First of all, we see his tan slops for the first time! Slops just sort of look horrible by default unfortunately but I’m enjoying the hat + slops combo here... it works for him. Secondly, Armitage disappears for the entirety of episode 5 so this is the first time we’ve seen the man since the lashing scene. I guess it was so traumatic to witness that he had to take a break.

He has a gun again though, so things can’t be all bad.

#6 - Big Carnivale Hours -- 8/10

I have given up on trying to figure out what the hell is going on with the marines and their costume theme. Are they knights.... with crowns? That’s all I’ve been able to figure. Who’s idea was this? (Despite having no evidence, I blame Pilkington.) So what does that make Armitage? Is he a squire? Or a knight that just doesn’t have a crown like the others because they ran out of them? Whatever the case, he’s clearly a part of their theme despite not being a marine himself which I think is adorable regardless.

Speaking of adorable, let’s just forget everything that happens for the rest of this episode and appreciate how he’s hanging out with Tozer and Heather. Isn’t that nice? God I’m distressed.

Taking a look at the costume itself, you’ll see that it’s essentially a cut-up burlap sack and a sheet over his regular uniform but realism is not the goal here and the DIY vibe is actually quite nice imo.

#7 - Enter: The Belt -- 10/10

The belt has arrived on the scene! Note its success in not only making the coat itself more appealing but making the coat + slops combo work against all odds.

We really get it all here: belt, (unbuttoned) coat, hat, welsh wig, gloves, and slops! What more could I possibly ask for in an outfit? It’s both stylish and practical.

And plus, I like his attitude in this scene - optimistic-leaning realism about the dangers ahead. I can get behind that.

Overall, no complaints from me - this is a perfect look.

#8 - tfw You Allowed This -- 7/10

This is a Significant Look mostly because we see his hair again, for the first time since episode 4! It’s a bit longer and more unkempt but still maintains a pleasing shape overall. Honestly, I think it looks good this way and its a pity we didn’t get to see it more in the transition stages (assuming it was steadily growing out since ep 4 like most people’s). Additionally, there’s a bit of stubble going on here which I respect.

Rated lower than it might be simply because, as has been established, slops on their own are just kinda ugly. I don’t have a lot to work with here outfit-wise. His face is lovely but this screenshot is a sepia-toned nightmare.

A bonus point for his desperate “please explain this clearly illegal thing we’re doing in a way that makes sense to Little” glance at Tozer, who is already on it.

#9 - Agony -- 8/10

It took me awhile, even after becoming aware of who Armitage was, to appreciate how truly miserable he looks in this scene. And I mean, why wouldn’t he be miserable? Tozer, a man who Armitage risked his own life to drag to safety at Carnivale, is about to be executed for something that’s arguably just as much Armitage’s fault and there’s not a thing he can do about it.

So... that’s depressing.

But, looking at the outfit itself, we see that it’s pretty similar to some past Looks. In fact, it’s identical to what he was wearing when the Tuunbaq attacked Heather with the exception of the belt which is, of course, a new addition since then! And look at the difference a belt can make... You almost don’t notice that the coat is buttoned up all the way.

#10 - The Same Outfit But Now He’s Saving Tozer So Its Cooler -- 9/10

Y’all ever think about the fact that, when things went to shit, Armitage’s first instinct was to grab a gun, find Tozer, and rescue him? I mean you probably don’t but I do. Constantly.

Obviously I love this part and the outfit is still solid (note how well the belt shows off his figure!) but it loses out on being a perfect 10/10 because he must have dropped his hat while picking up the gun so we never see it again. A necessary sacrifice but one that I mourn nonetheless.

RIP Armitage’s cool hat, ??-1848.

#11 - The Blue Sweater -- 8/10

It’s warming up so that means we finally get a look at the lovely layers that have been hiding under Armitage’s coat. It’s important to me to bring special attention to the sweater because, although (as I’ve mentioned) he has it on all the way back in ep 4, this is one of only two scenes in the entire show where we get a proper look at it.

Further, not only is he wearing the blue sweater, but he also has a blue vest on over it! Now, I’ll admit, these aren’t exactly complimentary shades of blue but it still works for me.

Note also that the belt he had around his coat has been repurposed to aid in holding up his slops-pants over his normal pants (which are held up by the suspenders). Does this man’s resourcefulness ever cease?

As much as I’d love to give a higher rating for the blue sweater, I can’t ignore the new beard which is... it isn’t... it’s Not Great. I don’t have as much animosity towards it as I used to but I can’t pretend that I love it.

#12 - Let Us Fly These Deadly Waters! -- 9/10

I’m not sure why but I’ve always found this outfit very appealing. The tan slops-pants go nicely with the white shirt and blue vest. It’s a solid look - I’d wear this irl honestly.

And bonus points for his trying to convince Tozer to leave Hickey, even though he was ultimately unsuccessful.

(P.S. - yes, the title for this one is a Moby-Dick reference... Did you really think I would make it through this entire post without one?)

...and now, last but not least, I present to you my absolute favorite Armitage Look™... all the other times I said some other outfit was my favorite, I was lying because what I am about to show you is truly the cream of the crop. Without further ado:

#13 - Kidnapping is Bad So At Least Look Good Doing It -- 12/10

Are y’all seeing this? Are you SEEING this????? It is episode fucking 10!! Everyone is dying!!! And yet here’s Armitage waltzing up in his best outfit of the entire show. What the fuck!!!!!!!

Do I even need to explain why this is exceptional? Just look at it! Look at how the vest is buttoned up and tucked into his slops-pants! Look at the suspenders over top which match the slops-pants in color! Look at the gun and keyring that look like they were made to accessorize this outfit specifically! Heck, even his hair and beard look much better from this angle.

Now, I’m not trying to discount the fact that Armitage was absolutely miserable throughout this entire episode, and understandably so, but, even with that in mind, I can’t bring myself to rate this look any lower. It’s just That Perfect.

If one must inevitably die horribly in the arctic, this is an excellent outfit to die in.

Well, that’s that! Thank you all so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed this! I’m glad that my ridiculous opinions about Armitage’s wardrobe finally came in handy for something other than my own amusement.

#the terror amc #the terror #thomas armitage #hell yeah let's tag this nonsense!#tbh i'm very proud of this post tho #it literally did take me all day #12 hours from conception to completion (with many breaks of course!)#and worth every second!#I love this man and his exceptional fashion sense #and i need you all to appreciate it as well #like i said - i hope y'all enjoy and thanks to those who read through my rambling!#love y'all!

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jbuffyangel · 5 years ago

Text

The Good and the Bad: Arrow 8x09 Review (Green Arrow & the Canaries)

Arrow did another backdoor pilot for the spin-off even though 7x16 felt like one,

but it’s clear from this episode things have been… retooled.

Not always for the better. I liked Green Arrow and The Canaries more than I disliked it, but I’m an easy sell. If Olicity’s progeny are available via my television then I’m watching. Period. End of discussion.

There’s good content for the writers to mine, but there’s definitely some kinks to work out.

Doing things a little different with this review. Yes, I can change.

It didn’t feel like a fully fleshed out episode and I have a feeling we’ll be repeating this pilot in some form if Green Arrow and The Canaries is greenlit, so for now we’ll just hit the highlights – the good and the bad.

Let’s dig in…

What I Loved

This is the first episode immediately after Crisis, so we don’t entirely know how the present day is impacted, but the future certainly is bright. Mia and William have grown up in an almost paradise. Star City is the safest city in the country. There’s been no crime for almost twenty years and it’s all thanks to the city’s hero – Oliver Queen.

Source: feilcityqueen

It’s nice to see Oliver being honored years later by the ungrateful twats of Star City. They are slightly less ungrateful in my eyes. However, it’s even more wonderful to see that Oliver’s children grew up safe, protected, and maybe even a little pampered. It’s everything he wanted for them.

The big stick with this carrot of course is Oliver not being able to raise William and Mia.

Mia Smoak is the princess we were promised and she is ready to ascend the throne. I loved everything about her character.

Source: kathmcnamara

The alternate timeline/universe (?) has softened Mia. There’s no anger. No dark and twisty past. No hatred of vigilantes. No resentment over lies and betrayals.

Mia knows her father was a hero, but she hasn’t grown up hiding out in a cabin with Felicity. Instead she grew up with William in the Queen Mansion (where she currently resides). On the surface, Mia’s life has been pretty friggin perfect, even if she’s a little adrift. That said, the Grand Canyon sized hole in her life is that her dad is gone.

Source: oliverxfelicity

Mia blissfully wakes

Source: kathmcnamara

and is proposed to by… JJ DIGGLE!

Source: kathmcnamara

We have a scantily clad naked Diggle boy and he’s already dropping down on one knee. This show is my crack.

This also means JJ Diggle isn’t evil! Plot twist!! Dun dun DUNNN!!!

Source: kathmcnamara

Mia says yes after a brief hesitation and the DIGGLE BROTHER LOVE TRIANGLE HAS COMMENCED. I know I’m the only person who wants this love triangle, but I don’t care.

JJ is the “good” brother and Connor isn’t “evil” but he seems like a colossal screw up with questionable facial hair.

But also maybe I like the facial hair?

It’s clear he has an adversarial relationship with Mia, but so many romances have been born from loathing. Enemies to lovers is a classic trope. I’m all in.

Of course, we’re supposed to expect Connor in Mia’s bed since the Season 7 flash forwards more than hinted at a brewing romance between the two,

but instead it is JJ. A plot twist the Olicity fandom called ages ago.

John Jr. is new and improved though. There isn’t much to dislike about this version of him. He’s kind, sweet, sexy, attentive and pulling out expensive jewelry in the first five minutes. What’s not to love? There’s a smol and tol aesthetic happening too. Everyone knows that’s my shipping jam.

Things immediately get rocky though (pun intended). First, JJ gives Mia the Queen family engagement ring.

Source: arrowdaily

Mia makes a point of saying it was her mother’s which gives me the feels.

I never had the same issues with Moira’s engagement ring others did, but even I can recognize there’s some bad juju in it

Next, Mia gets her memories back (more on THAT later) and officially remembers her fiancé was a psychopathic killer who ran one of her friends through with the pointy end of a sword. It’s a little difficult to kiss JJ after that visual.

Things don’t get much easier after Mia accuses JJ of being the mastermind behind Bianca Bertinelli’s kidnapping. (Yes, she’s Helena’s daughter). He’s not the kidnapper. All his secrecy revolves around the honeymoon JJ is planning. It does lead to a truly hilarious moment between the two characters.

JJ: Jumping to conclusions is I’m cheating on you not that I’m a kidnapper. For the record, I’m neither.

It’s a heavy moment, but I died. It’s going to be a little hard to pick out cake now.

The scene itself is heartbreaking. Charlie and Kat acted their asses off in it too. JJ thinks Mia doesn’t want to marry him. She hesitated before accepting his proposal (Yes, he noticed that Mia. So did I). JJ believes Mia is commitment phobic. It’s not wildly unlike how Oliver’s story began. Thank God there’s no cheating with siblings though.

Mia is merely struggling with the idea that her fiancé was a cold blooded killer in another world. She just needs some time to… adjust. She’s also a little commitment phobic. After stopping the real bad guys, Mia reassures JJ, but she doesn’t tell him the truth about who she is.

Mia: I couldn't imagine spending my life with anyone else."

I see your not-so-subtle wink at SmoakNHawke writers. I AM SO HERE FOR THIS.

The truly awesome moment with JJ’s character is when he gets his memories back too. I was not expecting this and was genuinely surprised. Charlie Barnett is a PHENOMENAL actor. He played that scene perfectly.

Giving JJ his memories back is a stroke of genius because now he's a more complicated villain (I hope). He gets to struggle with his love for Mia and his loony tune desire to take over the city.

Katherine McNamara also does a fantastic job of blending the two versions of Mia after she gets her memories back.

Source: supercanaries

She’s reeling from the suffering and loss, but Mia is still our bad ass princess who takes no crap.

Source: oh-my-hades

She is still every bit the hero Oliver and Felicity raised her to be.

Source: feilcityqueen

She’s just a little more pragmatic. Her communication skills are much improved. One of the best moments of the episode is when she gets to show up L*urel with her “new” experience.

Source: supercanaries

Mia telling L*urel where to stick it was a long time coming. We had to wait twenty five minutes for it to happen, but it was GLORIOUS when it did.

Source: arrowversedaily

William is a perfect cupcake, excited to be Mia’s man of honor, but bummed his boyfriend cheated on him. We hate Kevin.

Source: arrowdaily

He encourages Mia to join Smoak Tech, but she’s not sold on joining Mama’s company. William running Felicity’s company fills me with a deep and abiding joy.

William Clayton-Harris-Smoak-Queen is perfection from start to finish.

Source: oliverxfelicity

The chemistry between Ben and Kat is so natural. William’s good natured teasing about their “family heirloom” exuded warmth and love.

Source: feilcityqueen

I adore how comfortable the two characters are now. Erasing William and Mia’s separation is the best thing to come out of Oliver’s Crisis retcon.

ZOE IS ALIVE because I said she would be and I like to get my way.

Source: oliverxfelicity

Din*h owns a bar (Thea’s old club) and lives in the apartment upstairs (Thea and Olicity’s old loft).

Source: canarynetwork

She woke up in the future after Oliver’s funeral and discovered she doesn’t exist in 2040. I’m only mildly curious about this. The bigger shock is Din*h is tolerable. She’s compassionate towards Mia and often serves as the peace maker between her and L*urel. She feels like an older and wiser Din*h Dr*ke. More like Season 5 Din*h, but not so angry.

Also, hello that voice? She can be like Lorne on Angel and randomly break out into show tunes. Juliana did a beautiful job.

E2 Oliver cheated on L*urel with Sara too. There is no universe where L*urel & Oliver end up together. Nobody hates L*uriver more than these writers.

What I Hated

L*urel. I hated everything about L*urel.

At first, I thought I was being too sensitive, but after a certain point it was clear she is just an asshole. L*urel being unbearable in Arrow pilots is a tradition apparently.

It starts with how Mia gets her memories back. There were some spoilers out on this, but I wasn’t entirely sure how it would play out onscreen and yeah… total dick move.

Source: supercanaries

L*urel destroys Mia’s life by forcing unbelievably painful memories on her without discussing it with her first. And for what? So, Mia can help L*urel find her kidnapped friend.

Even the newspaper article L*urel drops about the Green Arrow failing the city doesn’t excuse the way she gave Mia her memories back. I understand she is trying to convince Mia to be a superhero, but I feel a more effective approach would have been to sit down, grab a cup of coffee, offer the pros and cons of getting her memories back and then let MIA DECIDE.

Source: supercanaries

L*urel didn’t need to grab her from behind at her graduation/engagement party. It had the uncomfortable vibe of mind rape and no amount of “girl power” makes that okay.

Oh hey - if J'onn J'onzz from Superg*rl is going around and zapping people’s minds without clearing it with them first -

What was with L*urel insulting Mia every two seconds? UGH. Where is that damn bird baton?

There’s a fine line between snark and nasty. L*urel was just nasty.

L*urel decides Mia is a lazy, self absorbed, idiot because she’s not immediately jumping at the chance to be the Green Arrow. She literally blew this kid’s life apart, gives her no time to process, and immediately begins insulting her because she’s not following all of L*urel’s commands.

On what planet does L*urel have any authority over Mia's life?

They have a warm and fuzzy heart to heart about choosing to be a hero to smooth over L*urel’s wildly unpleasant personality, but it’s ludicrous. L*urel didn’t even rate a goodbye from Oliver. I find her suddenly being an expert on what Oliver would want for his daughter pretty tough to swallow.

This conversation should’ve been with William. PERIOD.

Source: oliverxfelicity

It’s insane L*urel is judging anyone about anything because SHE IS A MURDERER. But sure, being a socialite is the real crime. Thank goodness L*urel is here to stop all the shopping.

The show was desperate glaze over Bl*ck Sir*n’s history with bizarre explanations.

L*urel: I wasted a lot of time pretending to be something I wasn’t because it was easier.”

So, Bl*ck Sir*n was pretending to be a murderer because it was easier?

That’s not a thing. You don’t pretend to a murderer. You just are one.

Bl*ck Sir*n wasn’t like Oliver Queen. She killed good and innocent people. We’re just supposed to accept she was always a good person simply because she says so? Sorry sweetheart, the evidence does not exist. I would send your ass to prison for a good 25 to life, but the network didn’t ask for my opinion about your participation in the new show. THEY SHOULD HAVE.

Then there’s the way they casually avoid things Bl*ck Sir*n has done.

Din*h: I can let go of the people I lost and mistakes that I made.

Din*h lost her boyfriend because L*urel murdered him. They ate French fries and drank milkshakes in a ten second scene and now we’re supposed to believe they’re best friends. Umm… no. If you want to make this friendship believable don’t pretend their history doesn’t exist. Most of your viewing audience is coming from Arrow. We remember that L*urel killed Dinah’s boyfriend.

L*urel: D you’re up. You ready?

Din*h: Never not.

Ugh. Cringe. Arrow was effortlessly bad ass because Stephen Amell made Oliver Queen look effortlessly bad ass.

The action was show, not tell, and that includes the dialogue. There is no making L*urel and Din*h cool, so just-

And POSE. It’s like mannequins in a Macy’s window. YIKES.

Source: canarynetwork

They force this “Ra Ra Girl Power” nonsense with clunky lines and empty camaraderie while at the same time; L*urel eviscerates Mia’s life choices by insulting her all hour. If you want to bolster “female relationships” on this network then start with the women treating each other with respect.

There was a criminal lack of William, Zoe and Connor. TERRIBLE DECISION.

Hopefully, this changes dramatically if the show goes to series. This is what I meant by “retooled.” It is clear two different concepts are being slapped together. The one we saw in 7x16 and whatever KC pitched to the network. The biggest flaw in this backdoor pilot is how disjointed it feels.

It’s like there are two shows. Mia has her life with William, Zoe, JJ and Connor and the other show is Din*h and L*urel. It’s similar to Oliver and L*urel/Tommy/Thea versus Diggle/Felicity in the beginning of Arrow, but it feels really unnecessary to make that mistake again. I do not feel Green Arrow and The Canaries is Marc Guggenheim and Beth Schwartz’s vision for what they wanted the spin-off to be and it is GLARINGLY obvious.

No mention of Felicity or Diggle. Yes, I understand why. We have to watch the Arrow series finale to find out what happens to our beloved characters. Mia and William never mentioning Felicity and JJ and Connor never mentioning Diggle & Lyla is WEIRD. Particularly since it was Mia’s graduation and her engagement party with JJ.

Stray Thoughts

I vote for this to be Mia’s next tattoo. Source: amunetblack

Well… that’s new information Din*h. Source: shawgroves

Why is L*urel calling Din*h “D?” When did that start?

Rene is running for a third term. Do we need to be concerned about a utilitarianism regime happening?

I will never believe Din*h can do “Felicity stuff.” Where the hell is William?

“Oh frack you.” FINALLY.

The adversarial relationship between Mia and L*urel is a wise choice given how KC and Katherine McNamara interact online with each other. Or don’t as the case may be.

What is happening with L*urel's boots? Are there bombs attached to them or something?

The lipsticks on L*urel and Din*h are not good. There's a lot of eye makeup happening too. Let's tone it down makeup department.

This is my face whenever I see L*urel too. Source: supercanaries

You killed her fiancée L*urel. Pay your fucking tab.

Female Big Bad. Could be awesome. Just have to wait and see.

I'm really glad William and Mia are rich again. I missed billionaire money. It's fun.

Disclaimer: Any gifs on the blog are not mine. If you would like a gif removed from my reviews, please message me. 8x09 gifs credited.

If you’d like to support the blog, please buy me a cup of tea!

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ifdragonscouldtalk · 5 years ago

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I never realized how much I wasn’t bad at math but was assumed to be bad at math because it took more time and different methods for me to understand than other people until I took Calc I in college

For those that don’t know I go to a pretty prestigious liberal arts/sciences college on the east coast and Calc I or Stats I are required for graduation from ANY individual (yeah, even me, an English major). For literal years I had been struggling with math. The last time I had felt confident in math, it was in middle school when I first took Algebra, which I aced thanks to a lovely actress and mathematician called Danica McKellar. She wrote math books specifically targeted towards preteen girls struggling with math, and I absolutely adored those books even though they were math and I had always struggled with math.

I actually enjoyed doing math that year, I loved her explanations which made the math seem so easy and simple, and she had a lot of really uplifting quotes and advice for girls too! The reason I needed her books, however, was because they had placed me in the wrong math class -- instead of pre-algebra they had placed me in the one below it, and when my parents found out they were really pissed because i was a “gifted” child, so the school said said “well, she needs to learn pre-algebra over the summer” and my parents were like “consider it done”. And sucks to be the school, because I aced that fucking class.

Only math class I ever aced.

I had taken AP Stats my senior year of high school, and if I had taken the AP test for that I would’ve been able to skip the college Calc. If I had taken the test. I was so incredibly lost in that class -- and not just me, the valedictorian and salutatorian were in my class and they struggled -- that I seriously thought I was going to get a D or F in it. I’ve failed (like, 54% FAILED) math tests before, but never the entire class, and I had done early acceptance to my college. The stipulation on early acceptance is that your GPA doesn’t drop and you don’t get lower than a C grade in any class, and a C was pushing it, and I’ve been hovering at 76 the entire class. (Note, the grading system in my county is an 8-point based system, meaning you needed at 92 to have an A.) I called my college, panicking that they were going to kick me out, and explained that my teacher was really bad and I could give them testimonials from the other students in the class, but to please not kick me out that I was really trying. The person in the admissions office who I spoke to asked me which school I went to and then replied “Oh yeah, we’ve heard about your teacher, you’re fine.” Not exactly what my high school wanted to hear.

So the high school ended up letting a bunch of us drop the AP test, something they’d never done for any previous AP test, and refunded us. I decided in college that even the idea of taking stats again gave me so much panic that I wouldn’t take it, and I had done alright in Calculus, so that’s what I ended up taking, second semester of my freshman year with one of my friends who also struggled with math.

And that class changed my perspective so much.

Math in high school drove me to insanity. Hours long sobbing fits, panic attacks, depressive episodes, tearing up my homework and screaming into my textbooks. I was expecting something along those lines for college, because it was supposed to be even harder. Me and my friend walked into class the first day, both terrified because we remembered Literally Nothing from high school math, and our professor, a self-professed introvert and a very shy and kind woman, was insanely patient. Calc I, at least the section we took, was really for the liberal arts majors who just Did Not do math. She said she had never planned on teaching, had only been doing it for a couple years, but really enjoyed it.

Even when we asked stupid questions, she tried insanely hard to understand where we were coming from. If we were having trouble verbalizing what we were confused about, she never pushed us to go faster, she gave us the time to work out what we were trying to say, often ending up with us answering our own question. If we were confused, she was very good at explaining the concepts in a different way. She gave us big-picture ideas, what the formulas could be used for, but never tried to push us into thinking we might use these in our every day -- she flat out said we probably wouldn’t, but they were good to know anyway!

And we asked stupid questions. Like stupid questions in the sense of almost-every-one-of-us-couldn’t-add-4-and-9 stupid questions. But she never ever gave any indication of judgement for that fact. Sometimes we would confuse her -- how did they get 12 from 4 and 9? -- but never once did she get annoyed when we didn’t understand. And we didn’t understand a lot! We literally spent two class periods on one concept she expected to take twenty minutes, and she never got mad or tried to rush us along. Our questions were ALWAYS answered.

Not saying the class wasn’t hard, because it was. My friend and I would spend an hour every single day sitting at my desk, slaving over the work, my dad (a math major) on the phone trying to help us. We both got Bs in that class, and we were so overjoyed.

I don’t think I had a point to this post, but if I did, it would be math should be patient. Not everyone understands Shakespeare when they first try to read it, and not everyone understands math when it’s first explained. The idea that everyone should understand a concept when its explained the same way to every person is asinine. Not everyone learns the same way, and I know so many people who have gone into huge spirals over math. That’s not how it should be.

So many people don’t go into STEM because of the math portion. Because we’re afraid of it. But in a workplace, we have the time to double check and to ask questions and to try and understand, in a way that school never lets us.

I think I absolutely would’ve adored math and probably would’ve gone into Bio, if only someone had taken the time to understand that I didn’t.

tl;dr High school math, and especially with those standards of learning implemented, literally destroys students who otherwise just need a helping hand, not a bad grade

#long post #sorry lmao #dragon life #math

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frenchtoastpanda · 5 years ago

Text

The Leverage finale

Gonna rant in public because @rainaramsay expressed interest. I have no theme this is just my thoughts as I rewatch this episode. Idk why I’m doing this. (Also I don’t know how to format, so sorry about that)

Oh right I forgot that this is a fucking sad episode why am I doing this to myself

Ooh the return of the Steranko! I am very glad they brought that back

I just love when they bring things back in general, like in the white rabbit job all of the companies looking to buy dogson are previous marks and how they have like three brand names for safes that they reuse a lot. It just makes it feel like a real world that people live in.

The theater! Perfect for Sophie! And the mentioned the tunnels, which I believe we encountered in the gold job

Sophie says “I have just the thing” and my immediate response is always “the play’s the thing” even though I know it’s from a different play than the one they are doing

And can we talk about how they are doing the same play as the pilot? Actually I will probably yell about that closer to the end

Parker being all emotionally cognizant and Nate just reciting physics formulas in response

God I love this bit (and I love that they are still including references to Nate’s alcoholism)

Just, Parker, the new mastermind, who doesn’t “let feelings get in the way” (like Hardison - this is the reason he can’t be the mastermind, much to his chagrin. He’s too much of a cinnamon roll)

Nate says she spins problems like puzzle pieces until they click, but I think it’s more like juggling all the fiddly bits inside a lock until it clicks open

HE TRUSTS HER HE TRUSTS HER HE TRUSTS HER!!!!!!!

Zachary is the lead! Love him!

Sophie saying she doesn’t miss acting at all 😏

She is a good director, though

"I'm exactly where I belong" I'm gonna die I am so happy for all of them

Oh no here we go

Cut right to Nate covered in cuts being interrogated about the mistakes he made

"Mr. Ford, how did your friends die?" CUT TO COMMERCIAL

This must have killed me the first time around

I do love this investigator though. I think I remember from the commentary that it wasn't originally supposed to be her, but it worked out really well

Nate looking around like he's confused (and trapped) while not being able to put together a full sentence (I'm not sure if I ever developed a solid headcannon for how much of this scene was him faking and how much was actual injuries from the actual crash) (I'm open to ideas!)

Ellen giving a vicious predatory little smile when she says that she's here to help him

I wish I could do gifs or screencaps or something. This is one of my absolute favorite callbacks! Parker in that little black bonnet thing jumping off a building having the time of her life and the boys do their "twenty pounds of crazy in a five pound bag" thing (whuch my autocorrect recognized as a phrase for some reason? Do I really yell about that but enough for it to suggest those words in that order? Fantastic)

But this time their faces and voices are full of affection. She may be an insane thief/mastermind, but she's OUR insane thief/mastermind

And coming after the white rabbit job where we had that line about how she's not and never has been crazy, the fact that you can tell they are saying this as a callback without meaning the crazy part is just perfect

It makes me wonder how many other times they have repeated this, because you can't convince me they haven't

Aah Sophie's horrible rendition of Lady Macbeth! Same speech, different ways of doing it just as badly (props to Gina Bellman)

Is this the same outfit? Hold on I need to check.

Y'know, I didn't think they changed that much physically over the years, given that they are adults, but going back to the pilot, I keep going awww look how tiny they were! (Especially Aldis. Like I know they had problems because he was getting too hot and ripped, but Damn)

Anyway, the dress is very very similar, same color and pattern, but it very slightly different. I will maybe post my very very horrible pictures after I finish this

Parker is so good at computers now that she has this adorably bored face when hacking! I love that they taught each other their stuff!

Using chaos as a distraction and co-opting the expected response as a cover! One of my favorite tricks!

Parker changing in the elevator! And the boys turning to give her privacy! And this isn't even the first time they did a callback to this! I love my respectful boys! Remember when Hardison turned the David around? So pure!

Ah, we are setting up for competency porn and then it all goes bad! Aah!

I love Eliot's little "wassup?" Before fighting the guy. Points for intimidation, Spencer

My stronk babies opening an elevator with their fingertips

And Hardison's recurrent fear of heights combined with Parker's love of them

She says "I got you" (twice)

Oh god Beth's acting in the elevator shafts

Oh I'm gonna cry

Oh and a "dammit Hardison"

Oh Gina's face

Even in a situation as tense as this, Eliot still takes the time to empty the gus and toss it away

I don't think I've ever seen him check for an ankle piece, actually. How has that not come up before now?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

"Age of the geek, brother" I'm sobbing

I mean, so is everybody

Look at this acting!

I love that they didn't go for the clichéd established couple dying in each other's arms, but instead put Eliot in the middle, giving us our yummy hurt ot3 goodness

And Parker sitting up so she sees the other two go

Ugh. Where's that poetic cinéma image when you need it?

Anyone remember the perfectly timed bridge from the pilot?

What number Lucille are they on?

I love that they actually stop in from of the barrier at the bridge, then take a moment to decide before just going for the crazy impossible stunt because why the hell not at this point

Ah Nate and Sophie are holding hands on the way to death too!!

And cut the scene before they reach the top of the bridge. Time to see Tim show us why he's an academy award winner

Ooh and here's where we find out she was lying! (Should this be the part where I started wondering if Nate knew? Probably. Did I? Not even a little)

There was a big twist where the person Nate was facing off against was playing him in the pilot too

But John fucking Rogers didn't play ME in the pilot. I take that personally.

Ooh hints at the true story are being dropped

Ellen is almost adequately suspicious

JUST WALK TWO FEET FORWARD ELLEN! LOOK AT THE STAGE! COME ON!

"You loved them very much" Yeah he did. They all did! Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh!

She knows he's lying, I love that (just like Dubenich knew Sophie was manipulating him)

"The only thing I ever had"? That's intense, Nate

God Tim is a good actor

(Like I low-key don't like Nate at all, but Damn he is well acted)

And he just turns it off, just like that

Wow

I am really into her little impressed face when he goes all Sherlock and explains how he knows they are at interpol

The glass! Of course Sterling brings him the glass! Not a pilot callback, but a good callback nontheless. The commentary says it's literally the same exact glass every time. I will have to go back and verify that at some point. I swear it didn't have those ridges around the bottom in at least one episode, but I also trust John Rogers, so idk

I love how sterling knows everything from the moment he appears, and Ellen doesn't even know what the black book is

"That's why you joined Interpol? Screw justice. You're the order guy?" What a good line for Nate and Sterling's relationship

Nate's not even interested in hearing Sterling's evil speech of evil about the bailouts

I actually really love the little exposition flashbacks

Her look of horror and dawning comphrension when he explains why he is there is fantastic. If we bring this show back, can we have more of this lady?

Yeah, Ellen, why IS he still lying to you??

Sterling remembered to be cautious about the coroner's van, but not cautious enough!

That's some timing. How did Nate arrange that ? Oh right, this was triggered by the arrival of the van, which he probably set the timing of

Nate's face after "Parker's still in the server room." Yes, sell that fear to Sterling! Make him believe he's right! I wouldn't have thought to fake a reaction to that. But that's why I'm not a griffer

And he trusted sterling to have a snark remark so that he could have an attention-stealing reaction to distract him

I try every time to see the kids going in, and I never manage to catch all of them

Why does Nate turn away here?

God, that really is a terrifyingly lifelike Hardison face

I gotta say, the first time I saw sterling shoot the Hardison corpse, I was really convinced that he was right and he was really killing Hardison for the first time

"Second question... No, Nate, why don't you tell her what my second question is?"

Honestly, the first time around, I had forgotten about that secret meeting between Nate and Hardison

"The plan's the thing" A callback to earlier in this episode. I'm dying. I love this show so much

And they can do that without being annoying because every leverage episode is like three or four episodes rolled into one. Sometimes more!

That's one of my favorite parts, but also one of the very few downsides

I get so excited watching the flashbacks that show how it all happened

Omg I love the thing where they stack! Parker crouching, Eliot just above her head, Hardison looming tall! It reminds me of the princess bride for some reason

Sterling is the Trojan horse, the way out is the way in...wait, didn't they do that with at least one other episode, where the floor was a horrible way in, but last minute they used it as a way out?

Are these callbacks or parallels at this point?

Sophie taught Nate how to act! "She found her calling." Yeah she did! So proud of her!

"Your ride to a life sentence in a secret prison has arrived" So dramatic for someone who knows Sophie is behind the wheel

Ooooooohhh he called him James!

"You and I are not the same" okay sterling

"Justice is always easy" YES GO STERLING wait that's a callback to the justice vs order thing earlier in this episode. I just got that

I have seen this so many times and I still notice something new every time I watch it

Does John Rogers have a tumblr? I want to tag him but I don't think he does

What is Parker wearing? Why is one sleeve randomly yellow?

I can't believe Nate is proposing in a hoodie

I love how the kids pop in with insults and Nate just agrees. He knows it's true

That's a huge fucking rock

"Did you steal it?" "No." "Oh, cause that would have been more romantic"

"I'll steal the first anniversary ring" lol I love these guys

Parker insists he follow the proper procedure

Oh wait, the ot3 are gonna branch out with other crews?

Y'know, in an alternate universe I could have shipped Eliot and Sophie

GOD

I'M CRYING AGAIN

"You're the smartest man I know" where have we heard that before?

Parker recognizing her feelings! (And they've been preparing her for this the longest)

Aah, the circle shot from above and the breakaway, but this time not everyone breaks away!!!!!!!!!!

"You do know that Laura is not my real name, don't you?" Sophie I'm gonna kill you

And then the big obvious callback to the pilot, where Beth meticulously studied Tim's acting to recreate it

Loving the look of this scene. The costumes, the blocking, all of it

And they made sure to switch which parent was crying

Very excited for leverage international. Gimme!

#leverage #the long goodbye job #meta #leverage meta #it's less a meta and more me screaming #but whatever #hopefully my autocorrect didn't renter this unreadable

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ae0nx · 5 years ago

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FRUITS BASKET ‘19 EPISODE 23 VS FRUITS BASKET ‘01 EPISODE 19

Ok! We’re finally here! We’re at the beginning of the storm! I’m so nervous... I didn’t know how to do these comparisons especially the storyline in the 2001 version not syncing up completely with the 2019 version. But I’m just gonna try and puzzle piece my way through it, ‘kay? :)

-------------------------------------------------------------

Also, just some notes that I wanna state about the 2001 version so I don’t keep repeating myself for the next 2-3 weeks:

- I love love love the opening. It breaks my heart and heals it every time I hear it and the images of the characters by doorways/windows/alleyways looking outward and always to the side of the frame is a great artistic choice and metaphor. Also, the lyrics are just simply... everything. ‘Let’s stay together always...’

- Some of the colour choices in clothing (or even the hair) that the characters have are... interesting. I definitely find myself appreciating the newer version as you can tell they put more thought into it, even if I do think the power ranger assigned colours are kinda silly. But really? Kyo wearing pastels?! No way. ...But I kinda love it anyway. Outfit Appreciation: 2.5 stars.

- I adore the music box sounding background music. It really adds a lot of whimsy to the show and kinda reminds me that Fruits Basket in a lot of its elements takes inspiration from fairy tales.

- The English dub voices obviously sound different and in comparison to the 2019 version, you can really tell how much they’ve all matured as VAs. ESPECIALLY Laura Bailey and Jerry Jewell.

- I also adore how ridiculous and mostly comedic the 2001 version is. Which makes the later turn in the anime so much more heartbreaking and tough to watch as it comes as such a shock compared to the tone of the rest of the anime. Unbalanced? Maybe so. But on a shallow kind of level without thinking too hard, I can enjoy it.

- I love 2001!Shigure. Again, it’s a shallow choice and I don’t deny he’s a lot more interesting and fleshed out in the manga/2019!anime. I just like 20-something year old, new-father-to-two-teens-but-he’s-not-like-a-FATHER-he’s-a-’cool-older-brother’ who likes to laze around the house in his kimono and ISN’T MENTALLY TRAUMATISING THEM. Well, without meaning to anyway... AND LOOK HOW CUTE HE IS.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Right! Let’s get into it!

This is me knowing the future trauma I’m going to have to go through with this anime.

But in all seriousness, the 2019 version really captured Tohru’s depression a lot better. Especially with the later scene where she breaks down in front of Kyo in the bedroom. A+ crying from Laura Bailey, I really felt it this time. As I said, the 2001 version seemed like it didn’t wanna deep dive too much so I’m glad we get a deeper in look to the complexities of Tohru this time.

It might be a translation ‘nothing’, but I find it interesting that Kyo felt like he jinxed her. Especially linked with his comments to Kagura later about how he feels ‘no one should want to hang around him’. I mean we’ll get into the reasoning for this most likely in the next two episodes but you can probably guess why... Poor kitty.

(Also side note: Do you think that’s why - out of everyone that has been bullied in this anime - Kyo seemed the least affected by school bullies? Is it cos of his experience within the Sohma family and his curse, that he almost expects that everyone he meets would treat him like that? It’s interesting because Hana had the same thought process towards her own bullying but she never fought back... But Kyo did. I might just conclude this thought as it just being in his nature to fight back, but we’ll see...)

Also, 2001 giving us Kyo freaking out in cat form about Tohru’s fever was pretty funny. Man, they really did do an overkill with the transformations back then...

2001 really was not good at showing the gradual progress of Kyo controlling his anger around Tohru as much as the 2019 version. Yes, in the 2019 ep, Kyo was still annoyed that Tohru wouldn’t just relax and concentrate on getting better but my God, Kyo is sooooo shout-y and yell-y in this version! And I don’t wike it lol.

However I shouldn’t shit on the moment too much. I do think 2001 wanted to show us that Kyo saw how receptive Tohru was to Shigure being calmer and nicer and it kind of influenced him to take more of a gentle approach to Tohru later. Kyo being influenced by Shigure is... questionable... but whatever, it’s got good intentions! (I still like the 2019 version better)

Momiji with the oversized work outfit! He’s so adorable I could cry.

- I’m kinda bummed that the 2019 version didn’t include the ‘Kyo stealing leeks from Yuki’s garden’ moment. It’s a hilarious moment (especially with Yuki’s reaction) and it is just PEAK ‘it’s not stealing if you’re taking it from family’ energy that I adoreeee and stand by lol

Really, 2001!Kyo... are you five years old?

‘ 🎵And at most... I’m sleeping all these demons away...’

‘ 🎵But your ghost... the ghost of you it keeps me awake’

Kyo seeing ghosts of Tohru is both unintentionally funny and dramatic in both versions to me, I’m sorry. I’m really just a child.

Where do I start? Kyo being ever so dramatic with the goggles and the face mask... Shigure with the all-knowing troll look. 2001 really gave us some gems and I think we all tend to forget that.

Plus...

I. LOVE. THIS. BROTHER. DYNAMIC. (I know it isn’t accurate don’t ruin the fanfic going on in my head)

- Tohru being depressed that she wasted Yuki’s time and didn’t fulfill her mother’s wishes makes me wish she was more so just concerned about herself and how she’s gonna pass for herself? But it is very much in her character to do so, so I guess I’ll let it slide. And I guess Kyo said what I said in well... his own unique way of giving advice.

- But when it came to the actual soup porridge scene, I lean more towards the 2019 version. There’s so much said in Kyo’s body language and Tohru’s own inner thoughts. She’s really falling in love with him and she doesn’t even know it!!!

THAT PEEK FROM HIS ELBOW?! COME ON!!! STOP IT. MY HEART. these dumb fuckin kids...

I loveee the 2019 porridge moment so much more, but this moment right here just ELEVATED the whole moment. It says so muchhhh without saying much at alllll and ohhhh this poor boyyyy...!!!!! It really took a fluffy moment and just stabbed me in the heart and I guess I respect you for that? Thanks...?

I’m so glad the 2019 version is feeding us in stupid made up songs. *chef’s kiss* haha

- I’m really glad that Kisa calls Hatori ‘uncle’ in 2019 and not ‘grandpa’ like she did in 2001. Cos as someone in their mid-twenties that shit was straight up offensive lol

The Momiji and Kyo moments are always so heartwarming in this version. My faves. <3

- Also I dunno why but I really liked Hatori, The Doctor Who Smokes in the 2001 anime. It didn’t make sense but quite honestly if anyone in this anime chose to smoke to let off some steam, it should be him. (Not an advocate for smoking)

---- Right! No more 2001 comparisons cos the episode that is equivalent to this part of the episode is also riddled spoilers for the next 2019 episode so... just normal review from here. ---

Why is it that Yuki’s insults against Kyo always hurt so much more?! They are both terrible to each other but for some reason, I always feel it more when Yuki verbally backhands Kyo. Maybe it’s the way Eric Vale practically venomously spits out these words or maybe it’s cos Yuki kinda has more privilege than Kyo so it feels like he’s kicking a literal homeless cat.

- Also, my poor boy! Definitely felt myself sympathising a lot more this time around to how weak he was feeling.

Lol I felt that exasperated breath. At least this time, Kyo doesn’t call Tohru’s umbrella ‘a sissy girly pink umbrella’. A minor improvement? (So, I might of watched a bit of the 2001 version of episode 24...)

...Need I say anything? <3

- HEADLINE: Shigure ships Yuki/Tohru and Kyo/Kagura? What is he up to...

- Kyo shouting at Kagura in the middle of the supermarket was a shitty move but Kagura mooshing his head in response was great... what a terrible but very entertaining couple lol

- Kagura’s ‘If I told you, you’d cry...’ is giving me all the heart pain. How many times can I say that I’m not ready...

I’ve seen people in the tag compare this moment to his porridge moment with Tohru and while I agree, it does seem like Kyo just naturally wanted to help Tohru compared to Kyo feeling obligated to hold hands with Kagura. But errrrm.... I just think Kyo is a good kid haha. And while I do think he CLEARLY holds Tohru in a very treasured and locked away place in his heart, he just doesn’t like it when girls cry around him and will do anything to stop it. I also think he does care about Kagura, and that he’s more so annoyed that Kagura doesn’t seem to get that he won’t love her in the way she loves him (and well... her being a tsundere lol). But I could be wrong! I’m a walking manga amnesiac as always...

*HIGH PITCHED SCREAMING*

Talk about FINALLY. They really named the episode that and made us wait until the LAST SECOND OF THE EPISODE TO GIVE US THE WORDS: ‘You look well...’

What a tease.

And we’re not even gonna get into the preview for the next episode and how three words made me tear up minutes before I had to go to a party on Friday night.

Wow. This might be the longest review so far. I don’t doubt that next week’s will be longer lol. The reason why I wanted to do the 2001 comparisons will probably make more sense next week and I will also say my thoughts on the 2001 version of the events with the umbrella and Kagura and Kyo’s date next week before I go into the review.

Jeez, this took two hours to write. WHY DO I DO THIS?!

#fruits basket #furuba #fruits basket 2019 #fruits basket 2001

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faunusrights · 5 years ago

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OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 15

IN THIS EPISODE OF MURPHY LOSES THEIR SHIT ON MAIN:

“Tell her I said: fuck you, you miserable, conniving bitch. I don’t answer her summons. I don’t obey her orders. I’m through. I’m through with her, with all of you—”

THERE’S LORE, BUT IMPORTANTLY MURPHY REMEMBERS WHY THEY THINK CINDER’S HOT. LITERALLY.

already??? already??? yes, already. this chapter is called ‘nothing personal’ anmd i think that this is a lie. this is abt to get very personal very quickly.

It had taken two more days for Glynda’s soul to become bearable enough for Cinder to sit next to her on a bus.

out of the funniest lines they could have used to open the chapter up, this is just Peak. there’s so many moving parts to this. glynda’s rank soul. cinder having to be nice for TWO DAYS to make her chill out. the fact they’re taking the most menial form of transport of all time. oh my god they were sat beside each other. this is already so funny.

Gravity Dust glittered like volcanic glass.

👈😎👈 we sure love volcanoes around here huh

The clearing Cinder found was some twenty minutes from where she left Glynda with instructions for something salty for her.

im almost POSITIVE im not supposed to find these lines funny but cinder you are RADIATING salt you are COMPOSED ENTIRELY of salt please. you’ve asked for smthng salty and glynda’s gonna come back announcing she’s foiled all yr plans on accident again.

Mercury had stopped sending messages a month and a half ago. Emerald’s last one was a week old.

im almost definitely mentioned it in a prior liveblog but its worth remembering: cinder’s relationship w/ merc and em rly was the deciding factor in me suddenly loving her as a character and i just. every interaction they have hurts so good. cinders got TWO kids and even if her face says otherwise she loves them very much and that heals me on the inside

“There’s no way anyone knows about this island. We’re the only ones out here. Merc and I have to get his shitty frozen pizzas airshipped in.”

“Still. Be careful.” She paused for a moment. “...Is that all he’s eating?”

“You know he’d die before he ate a vegetable.”

“He will, at this rate.”

I LOVE U MOMMA CINDER AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA this is SO good. this section HEALS ME!!!!!!!! which is good because i have a feeling the rest of this will gore me alive

"I promise. At the end of all of this, I'm coming back and I'm not leaving again. Trust me."

aaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA god u cant tell thru text alone but this section is K I L L I N G me and H E A L I N G me and also KIL L I

“It doesn’t have anything to do with trust,” Cinder said, miserably. “I need you to be safe.”

N G M E

The line between us and them had felt so concrete.

god i just. theres so much i still cant say that isnt 👈👈👈😨👈👈👈 but cinder and hati and all this other STUFF happening in the bg is so good and i just love how nuanced this dumbass is. cinder fall, the woman who never wins, and her brief moments of comfort. she is my ANGEEEEEEEEEEL

Now the only thing left was to deliver her to Atlas; if she had to speak with her more to do that, she would.

Not that she wanted to have to admit that to Hati.

cinder:there’s a lot of we and our going on and i’m a little nervous that the more we talk the more thats gonna happen and i gotta say; not a fan.

and [Glynda]’s desperate for—”

A heritage? A purpose? Belonging?

“She’s desperate,” Cinder finished, softly. Then: “She’s coming willingly.”

this might be another 👈😎👈 situation or im just drawing parallels like a three year old with a newfound ruler but HRM. CINDER. HRM.

Rather, her stomach twisted at the implications. Everything was ready. The machine worked. All that was left was to deliver the final piece.

“Okay. Good.” It was good. It was the culmination of years of work.

whats good and fun is watching cinder wrestle w/ her own humanity and its rly good because even as she tries her very best to use ppl to her own ends that pesky lil soft bitch inside makes her second guess everything and its GREAT fun. u can rly see that as soon as she spends longer than an allotted 10 minutes w/ somebody she starts being like ‘hrm. oh no’. oh cinder. u soft bitch. ilu.

The spot beneath his wing, though… Cinder folded into it as though it were meant for her, as though they were meant for each other, bodies fitted so easily. Here, safe, she closed her eyes and dreamed bleakly of the days to come.

i swear to god i cannot wait until [redacted] and [redacted] and [REDACTED] happens cause then i can lose my shit abt this ALL OVER AGAIN but for now. for now. immerse myself in cinder cuddles. im holding back but on the inside im feral

but Cinder was all calm, sliding through the trees like she belonged here. Like it was her domain by birthright.

FERAL.... FERAL!!!!!!!!!!!!

Because they were not friends, Glynda asked, “Where are we going?”

i love that glynda has to preface it like a reminder. because they were not friends. because she cannot trust winter. because she blocked oz’s number lmao. it’s great seeing how much more... clinical, i guess, glynda’s thoughts are, and it’s a great way to show the narratives differences? its GOOD is what im trying 2 say on main,

Instead, she complained, “It’s so difficult to be so wanted.”

firstly: i love cinder “i have a complaint” fall is secondly: i am going to read into this. i am going to read into this and divine a second meaning. i am reading into it.

Cinder emerged from the dark like a leviathan sloughing off a sunless sea. It rippled around her shoulders, swallowed the back of her skull, but the only sharpness to her was her smile. It was the first time Cinder had smiled since returning from her meeting with the Manticore.

oho. ohoohohohoooohohohooOUGHHOHOHO she hot. nasty mean lady big hott.

“You don’t scare me,” Glynda insisted.

“Silly you,” said Cinder. “Come on. I’ll lead.”

hohogughgohohoghgh f flirtign.......................,,,,,,,,,.,.,.,.,.,.,.

a faint light was stirring to life before her—suffusing out along Cinder’s chest and throat, spilling from her heart and out through her skin. In the beginning, it was so faint it seemed to be an illusion; but no, soon enough it was undeniable, and Glynda could even make out the rough shapes of the wall and floor.

YEEEEEEEEES i love. glowy lantern cinder. like theres a lot of fun little canons abt cinder in this fic i adore but the fact that she glows is like fuckin TOP. look at her. lil candle baby. shes like a microwave bean toy. i adore her.

She walked like a queen through her domain, seemingly irrespective of where on Remnant they were; even here, underground, in forgotten left-behind places, Cinder reigned.

god im sorry im too busy being gay to even be paying attention to anything rn i LOVE cinder to DEATH,,,,,,,,,, she knows shes the thing 2 be feared around here and its so good. i cant wait for her to open her big mouth and fuck it up again!!!

“High Leader Khan requires your presence in Mistral, Ms. Fall. She advises that you attend promptly, in order to discuss the missing members of our organization.”

A hum. Cinder said, “I don’t want to.”

GHSDFGSDFGHKJDF cinder you are. smthng else. shes just so LIKE THAT. what a great chapter for cinder this has been im SIPPIN baby

okay im doing a lot of leaping haead here and its not for lack of having anything 2 say in fact its QUITE the opposite because this whole bit is. wow. we got lore??? lore??? abt so many things??? what does any of it mean????? I AM NOT SURE BUT IM LOVIN IT (tm)

“It’s not a Semblance, idiot.” The control in Cinder’s voice was all staccato, pitching cold to inferno in an instant. “It was a gift.

okay bear with me for this JUICY LORE but i am Deeply fascinated by this section. im not gonna. say anything because idk how this is tying up yet (bear with) but HOO. HOOOOOOO. im trying to like keep grabbing sections but this whole part is SO GOOD i am loving-- like-- id have to-- TRUST ME THE OG WASNT AS SPICY AS THIS OKAY

THIS IS SO MUCH SPICER AND ITS GOOD

Cinder glowed like the magma heart of a volcano.

ITS SPICY ITS GOOD ITS 👈😍👈

im gonna have to reread this bit to get the full effect because the downside of a liveblog like this is having to stop-start but OUGHGHGHGUGHUGH THE LORE,,, THE MASKS,,, THE FANG??? also sienna dont listen 2 her baby i love u too

Cinder looked like a line to be crossed, and even though they weren’t friends—rather the opposite—Glynda found she didn’t want to cross her. Not now, when the emotion was still raw on her face.

oughgh... the vulnerability. cinder... snoft... but also angery 😔

this was SUCH a good chapter im DYING i love cinder in offal hunt to BITS and this arc is already feeding me so much good shit. fuck yea. FUCK YEA. HELL YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--

#rwby #offal hunt #liveblog #welcome to the cinder fall defence squad how may i take yr order

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bakugaykatsukii · 5 years ago

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I Talk About Bakugou Because I'm Bored

Bakugou. He's best boy. My son.

No, actually, I'mma explain in as few words as possible why I absolutely adore his character.

Oops this got long.

Okay, so it's the first chapter/episode (I'll go off the anime because it's practically identical and more widespread) and it opens with Deku narrating. This is to establish an immediate connection between the audience and the main protagonist; it conveys how important Deku is. Plenty of shows do this so it's not really a big deal, just common practise. HOWEVER, the second character we hear speak is Bakugou, who is insulting Deku.

This is framed in a way that's supposed to make us dislike him, and continues all throughout the first episode. He's presented as a four year old trying to beat up our main character, and then his next scene is being ten years older and Still Trying To Beat Up Our Main Character. This makes him seem rotten to the core, as his character hasn't changed whatsoever in that time, and as an audience we know very little information about him.

On top of that, within this first episode he is deliberately made to have no redeeming qualities, nothing that could make him sympathetic in any way. The Sludge Villain fiasco isn't until ep2, and in this one he literally tells Deku to kill himself, reaching peak middle school bully. He destroys something the Main Protagonist clearly treasures and is privelaged in every conceivable way, even his (later obviously intense) desire to be a hero is simplified to monetary gain, with "I'll be even richer than All Might himself!!!" (or something to that effect). Later on I'd explain such a line to be a result of young Baku trying to quantify his future success, something he never mentions again after the Sludge Villain.

In these first twenty minutes of the anime, he's been absolutely dragged through the mud. Not only is he this arrogant, selfish, mean bully, he's also the sort of bully we can all relate to having, making him even more dislikable! It's so easy for an audience to write him off as irredeemable almost immediately.

But then comes ep2. Seasoned anime watchers likely brush over some small details, but the fact that the Sludge Villain attack happens when Bakugou is 14? Wow. At this point no one likes him, and to many people seeing this happen could come across as a sort of karmic punishment, deserving and therefore less sympathetic. And so Horikoshi succeeds in continuing to make him dislikable but also adding depth to this character who so clearly believed he was invincible.

However, any such depth is pretty much ignored by the audience. I've watched many reactions, and, at this point, due to Bakugou's sub par personality, most people don't care about what happened upon first viewing. To be fair, it's treated as background until Deku steps in and proves himself a hero, at which point he's promised a quirk and That's all anyone can think about.

(also there's some symbolism in this ep because Bakugou and Deku were both attacked by the Sludge Villain and saved by All Might, showing they are actually equals in character and have a lot in common.)

Anyway, so for the first few episodes no one gives two shits about Bakugou because he's meant to be dislikable. He's set up to be as bad as possible without needing to be arrested/never being redeemable. Yet, he's also not clearly set up to be redeemed whatsoever. Let me explain:

Quick break from bnha to head over to atla, Zuko is the perfect redemption arc. And some of that can be attributed to his presentation in the first few episodes: where he's portrayed as antagonistic but still honourable, and has a tragic past. He's the sort of character you know isn't actually bad at heart. But Bakugou hasn't got any tragic back story to speak of, and certainly isn't honourable, so we don't expect a redemption.

That's so interesting to me, because it basically means his character could go in any direction but most shounen fans expect him to be the typical rival. He's mean now and will be mean later, nbd. Will probably betray Deku in order to gain more power. That sort of stuff.

But, as the first season progresses, we're shown that Bakugou (on top of all of his anger issues and cruelty) is also so incredibly determined, to the point where it's harmful. A lot of people, even in season three, expect him to accept the LoV's offer, but as early as ep7 he's shown to be dedicated to being the best on his own. He utterly fails at pretending to be a villain, and doesn't manage to work with his "villain" teammate. When the USJ attack rolls around, he fights alongside Deku.

I feel like I've just word babbled for a while so here's a picture:

Isn't that adorable? Anyway, I continue.

Okay, recap: Bakugou is presented initially as bad and in no way sympathetic, but throughout season one some of his good qualities do get highlighted.

The Sports Festival is probably when I was most on edge about who my favourite character was. Todoroki vs Deku vs Bakugou was a whole internal debate. We all know who eventually won though. Point is, this is the first time Bakugou is supposed to seem likeable.

Like, yes, he helped out at the USJ, but he was still reckless and angry about it. In this arc his flaws stop seeming so antagonistic (even though he's now more at odds with 1-A than he's ever been) and are framed humorously; if you think about it, the only times you're not rooting for Bakugou in this whole arc is when you're laughing at his antics. He stops seeming like a massive unforgivable bully and becomes a secondary threat behind Todoroki, even though he ultimately wins the Festival.

One of the first things he does in the season is tell people messing with their class go away, albeit bluntly, and is then complimented for it by Kirishima, who is the nicest guy in the class! No longer are we supposed to necessarily dislike him, as he's being developed after all of season 1. Him saying "I'm gonna win" as his speach is expected by the audience and laughed at- absolutely nobody watching was scared he'd hurt Deku in some terrible way due to it.

The cavalry battle demonstrates that he can work in a team after some adjustment time, and he gets his own antagonist (Monoma) who we all root against! This makes us closer to his character, as in a way we have a common enemy.

Then obviously the single battles are super interesting, his one against Uraraka especially turning people to his side. Since Aizawa, who as an audience we trust after his actions at the USJ, backs up Bakugou's actions, we accept them as the right thing to have done. Especially since Bakugou later calls Uraraka "not fragile", demonstrating that he can respect people and actually isn't as discriminatory as his earlier actions against Deku might lead one to believe. Everything about this fight is pure gold.

The rest of his fights are also very interesting, so let me go off on a little tangent. He's the only person to 1) be uninjured by the end of the festival (he did win tho so...) and 2) he's the only person to win all of his fights by forcing his opponent into submission. He knocks out Uraraka and Kirishima, goes to knock out Tokoyami but has him give up instead and then knocks out Todoroki! His fights are so much more violent than the others, who are primarily trying to win by pushing their opponent out of the ring or by immobilising them, which could make him come across as more aggressive (which he is). But it actually works for his character considering the way he demonstrates respect is by giving his all, therefore in order to show he cares about these fights he has to go for absolutely decimating the person against him.

Also, interesting side note to all that, out of our main three festival contenders, Bakugou is the only one who actually needs to use the festival for its intended purpose: impressing scouts. Todoroki, as the son of Endeavour, is already known throughout the hero community as a promising young talent, and could even get the No2 hero to coach him if he so wished. Deku even says himself that he doesn't necessarily need to get scouted when All Might is already teaching him. Out of the three Bakugou has the most incentive to actually show off here, no guilt/baggage required.

Anyway blah Stain arc blah. Bakugou picks Jeanist to intern with, which many might think makes him shallow. Their quirks are in no way similar and their images are almost diametrically opposing, and Bakugou only chose him because he's such a highly ranked hero. However, I believe the creators crafted this pairing in order to convey how good of a future hero Bakugou promises to be. BJ, in these episodes, is all talk. He's such a superficial hero that, in order to rectify Bakugou's foul personality, he gives him a haircut. He demonstrates the arrogant nature that Stain hates so much. Meanwhile, Bakugou ignores him and is still arrogant in his own way, obviously, but not for anything other than his own pride. He, when you break it down, spends all of his time working towards a genuinely good goal, just to prove to himself that he's worthy- no desire for fans or fame in there, he wants success but isn't actually looking for any of the perks that come with it. This, imo, makes him better than BJ. Also, Bakugou never actually says he is working with BJ due to his rank and could be doing it because their quirks botha require so much time, practice and effort.

Okay, so, now for the final exams. This is where I decided he was my favourite. He works with Deku etc and proves to the audience that he can work with him and won't necessarily become a villain, plus All Might lets loose a little and proves he too can be violent and mean.

What I really love is about ep24 s2 is actually the bit that makes a lot of people chuckle: where Bakugou bites AM's hand. This kid has been giving his absolute all, putting every ounce of strength into beating his idol, because, lbh, his self worth depends on his success here, until he literally cannot raise his arms to punch anymore. And yet, he still refuses to go down, despite every odd against him. Something about that tenacity is just so incredible to me.

It's almost 1am, let's have another break, shall we?

Idk I thought it was funny when it came onto my dash.

Btw, it's now I wish I knew how to hide most of a post lololol.

Season three is just Baku's season, ngl. Like,,, so many of his Stans got their start here, and it's not hard to tell why. A big reason why Bakugou felt irredeemable was because he had no reason to be so mean, but the narrative makes up for that by then putting him through so many bad experiences.

There's been a million metas on why he's so perfect in this season, and this is already abhorrently long, but ah well.

Okay so he's captured by the League through no fault of his own. As the audience when we find out Bakugou is missing we immediately think he's done the dumb thing and gone off on his own, but it's quickly revealed that he's already been kidnapped. Tokoyami is also taken, cementing that the LoV are looking for kids with some villainous feature, but also showing that their perception of what makes a child villainous is skewed, since we know Tokoyami is good.

At the hideout Baku is entirely restrained and silent, so clearly against his will. If we remember every other time he's been restrained (so goddamn many) we'll think back to the Sludge Villain, finding out Deku had a quirk, after his *win* against Todoroki and his internship with BJ. In this way, it's obvious to tell that this is all a Bad experience for him, as those were all very negative times in his life. There's no way he'll join them.

None of the pros even consider it a possibility. Aizawa defends him against the press (and, once again, we like Aizawa! So we trust him) and none of his classmates think he could be evil, they're all primarily concerned for his safety. Even BJ, who insinuated that Baku could easily become a villain, doesn't appear to believe he'll turn down that path.

Also Baku is pretty cool when he fights of the villain like I'm ngl.

And then, when he sees All Might? And his face screws up? With his lip trembling? It's undercut with a joke but he's so obviously just a scared/relieved kid in that moment and it's gut wrenching to remember that.

It's really getting late and I'm at 11% here so speed round through the provisional licence exam.

He can tell Shindou is two faced

Even though he's blunt he's still got the instincts and smarts of a hero

The class looks up to him

Aizawa has a lot of favouritism for this child, y'all, how did I not notice this?

His failure here is intrinsic to his character growth as it means he hits absolute rock bottom and we can move onto:

Deku Vs Kacchan 2

Where to even start. The guilt and pain he experiences has made me tear up several times just from thinking about them, and that GODDAMN VOICE CRACK AS HE YELLS nope it hurts too bad.

It's sort of the culmination of every emotional issue Bakugou has exhibited throughout the series. He can't find self worth without constant praise and pressures himself to be unimaginably perfect, to a self destructive point. He has no support system in place to help him with these issues. His anger stops being repetitive/funny/annoying and is finally, clearly shown to be more damaging to himself than to anyone else, as he feels the only way he can deal with his stress and hurt is by lashing out at those who try to help him.

In this fight we also learn why Deku, even though he's Baku's victim, still looks up to him so much. And the whole dynamic is so perfect I might cry rn.

I am annoyed, though, that further than that Baku's mental health has been pretty much entirely ignored for 200 manga chapters. Probably my only complaint about him.

At an entirely selfish level, I can relate to Bakugou. Obviously I'm not a teenage boy with explosion powers who bullies people in order to feel any self worth, but the high standards for himself? The pain at any failures? Being told through childhood how great you are only for it to be torn away in your teens? That's all so painfully relatable to me, and so I feel an even deeper connection with his character.

One last picture to finish off:

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jojotichakorn · 5 years ago

Text

HIStory3: Trapped: Review (& General Info)

About the Series:

Summary: A police officer and a gang leader were killed in a gunshot attack four years ago. What's the secret behind this case? The only survivor, Tang Yi, is now the gang leader. Shao Fei is a police officer, who’s been following Tang Yi around for the past four years, trying to figure out what’s really happened during the attack. Will he be able to get to the bottom of the case? And can something unexpected come out of their rivalry? (Trailer)

Couples: Main gay couple, as well as two side couples - one gay, one straight.

Running Time: 10 episodes - around 45 minutes each - 8 hours in total

Cast (& their Instagram pages): Jake Hsu (Shao Fei), Chris Wu (Tang Yi), Andy Bian (Jack), Kenny Chen (Zhao Zi), Diane Lin (Hong Ye), Sphinx Ding (Dao Yi), Zhang Guang Chen (Andy), Stanley Mei (Li Zhi De), [more].

Where to watch? VIKI (if you watch on mobile, you’ll have to download the app).

Related Shows: HIStory is a recurring Taiwanese BL series, however, each season is separate from the others and none of them are connected in any way, so there’s no other Trapped content out there.

My Review:

Rating: 9.5/10

Short review: Trapped is my favorite BL of all time. It has a good plot, fantastic acting, the most wonderful couple ever (whose intimacy is handled incredibly well), amazing characters, awesome friendships and a whole list of other great things. Despite having one controversial character, a slightly questionable background couple and a not-so-satisfying (though still not bad) ending, I don’t think there’s anything that could stop you from enjoying it. And though, as usual, it’s obviously your own decision to make, it’s definitely a must-watch in my book.

Extended review (under the cut):

I consider Trapped the best BL that exists to date – without a shadow of a doubt. Not everyone agrees with me and that’s entirely understandable, however, I assure you that even though someone might prefer one or a couple of other BLs to this one, everyone considers Trapped one of the best ones for sure.

The plot of Trapped is thought-out and actually good. It obviously isn’t a masterpiece of modern cinema, however, unlike so many other BLs, the plot actually matters. It’s interesting, gripping, well-thought-out, with a nice mystery and some unexpected reveals that might actually surprise you. Everything gang-related isn’t just there for show – it’s done tastefully and doesn’t seem cheap at all, you truly believe it. So many moments are hilarious, especially in the beginning. And the show is very meticulous and careful with all its little details, so there are no annoying minor plot or aesthetic inconsistencies that could take you out of immersing into it. The pacing of the plot is a tiny bit slow in the first couple of episodes, but it needs that to build itself up properly, and it quickly picks up as soon as it can.

The characters in this show are amazing. You will not only fall in love with the mains, but also adore most of the background characters and hate the rest of them, which just goes to show how much each of them can impact you emotionally because they’re that fucking great. All the details about the characters are well thought-out and awesome too. Tang Yi is not just a gang leader in name – Chris, the actor who plays him, does a fantastic job of showing just how intimidating Tang Yi can be and generally convinces us of him being the Big-Bad-Gang-Boss through so many brilliant subtle acting choices. The villain is actually threatening and terrifying too. Shao Fei can be rather embarrassing and cringy, however, Trapped certainly manages to show that this is truly just his personality, and they’re not just doing this for laughs. Besides, I’ve heard many people who usually get second-hand embarrassment all the time say they didn’t feel awkward for Shao Fei at all – he isn’t embarrassed since this is his true, authentic self, so no one else is embarrassed for him either. Finally, two background queer characters are fantastic. Usually, in other BLs background queer characters, who aren’t there for a romantic plotline, are never anything beyond a stereotype and are always there for laughs. That’s not the case in Trapped. Both of the characters are absolutely incredible, authentic and beautiful – most certainly one of the best background characters I’ve seen in any BLs.

I must note that one character definitely caused some controversy in the fandom, and I can’t say much else beyond this without giving you a gigantic spoiler. However, even though I do think they could’ve handled the topic better overall, I don’t find there’s anything wrong with having one of the many queer characters in the show be a bad person. I’ve talked about it many times and, considering the fact that we still have at least six positively-portrayed queer characters, the seventh being a piece of shit does not affect the representation in any way and doesn’t suddenly give all queer people a bad name. There are shitheads among us too, you know. And it’s important to talk about it.

Moving on, let’s talk about relationships. For starters, the main couple is hands down the best enemies-to-friends-to-lovers you’ll ever see – that I personally guarantee. Their romance is developed well and treated with the care it deserves, and they end up being the most adorable, wholesome couple ever. I also want to especially point out how well Trapped handles their intimacy. A lot of other BLs have their couple treat each other like friends half the time, be dating another half and kissing/having sex on rare occasions. In reality, though, a couple is always intimate with each other. And I don’t mean that everyone fucks like bunnies – no. I mean couples have intimate conversations, hold hands, kiss each other in a million different ways (and on a million different spots), cuddle for no reason, hug, express emotions and, of course, sometimes have sex. Not every couple does absolutely everything I’ve just listed, of course, but you get the overall point. Couples are intimate. And Trapped gets that. It shows that. And that’s wonderful. As for others, the straight background couple takes up just enough screen time to not annoy you and it’s actually kind of cute, which is super rare for me to say. Now, the gay background couple is rather questionable. One of the guys is kind of oblivious and juvenile, while the other pushes him too hard. It’s not so critical that I’d tell you to skip their moments, however, it is definitely food for thought and I’d say pretty problematic.

The friendships in Trapped are sort of a double-edged sword. On one hand, we have Shao Fei and Zhao Zi, who were proclaimed to be best friends, but don’t end up having any meaningful moments together and are really out of the loop with each other’s lives by the end of the show. This can be explained and justified, but I still feel like it’s a little unrealistic. On the other hand, though, we have Tang Yi and his friends – mainly, Andy, The Doctor (whose name I, apologies, don’t remember), as well as Hong Ye and Tang Guo Dong. Despite only seeing a couple of moments with each of them, we get attached to every character and their relationships with Tang Yi very easily. His friendships with Andy and The Doctor are familiar and realistic. His relationship with Hong Ye is deep and authentic – you can truly see they are like siblings to each other. And his relationship with Tang Guo Dong is so beautiful and raw that you end up falling in love with the “found father” trope and wish you had the same relationship with your parents or any mentor figure, really. Despite Tang Yi and Tang Guo Dong only having four small scenes with each other – all of which are flashbacks, their dynamic is my second favorite in the show and their relationship is one of the best father/son relationships I’ve ever seen.

Finally, the show is shot beautifully and the acting in it is on a completely different level. Seriously, you will say, “Holy shit, this actor is so good!” like every other second. I literally grabbed my pen to write some version of “the acting is so good” in my notes, while rewatching the show for this review at least twenty times, and the only thing that stopped me is already having it written down thrice.

The very last note I have is about the ending. Now I will say immediately that this show does not have a bad ending – I could not have it as one of my favorites, if it did, I’m strictly a happy-ending kind of person. However, the ending is still a little too vague for my taste and I wouldn’t say I’m satisfied with it. It’s not the end of the world and overall it’s an alright ending you can live with – nothing bad happens. However, I wouldn’t call it the best ending this show could have – and that’s all I can say without giving any spoilers.

Finally-finally, should you watch this show? Fuck yes! Absolutely, my guy! Have you heard all I’ve just said? It’s brilliant. An absolute fucking masterpiece, I’m telling you. So yes, I recommend it to literally everyone. There is legitimately no other series I want to show everyone as much as this one – this is fucking mandatory in my book. Regardless of however I feel about it though, at the end of the day, it’s obviously your own decision to make.

#my fav show is in my dudes #history 3: trap #history 3: trapped #archer's bl recs

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rkkyg · 5 years ago

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focusonyugyeomday 20191117 ; kim yugyeoms birthday hongdae fashion street

9:30am

his second alarm blares to life in his ear and this time he actually finds himself waking up fully to it, not just blindly turning the snooze on. the sound making his head pound a little--a reminder of the lack of sleep he would be going on today.

his eyes, still hazy from just waking, take in the notifications on his phone as well as the date sitting right under the time. November 17th.

it’s his birthday.

he vaguely remembers dongmin saying something when he got home last night. the trainee having been home much longer than him due to trc’s weekend schedule ending sooner. sadly, yugyeom had picked up an extra shift that day and he didn’t arrive home until well after midnight--tired and unaware of what the day had become. even now, it took a moment for his mind to catch up, and when it does, he’s shooting up to a sitting position and opening his phone to all the messages.

coworkers, friends, busking pals, and even the fans spamming his instagram account ( both his own and dynamite official ) with comments and dm’s and mentions. it makes a smile form on his face. feeling the love from everyone.

12:44am

he was off work today. the ahjummas gave him gifts and snacks yesterday and then forbid him from coming in today no matter what. they apparently had seen how worn he was getting and wanted to let him have the day to himself. a rare treat as yugyeom normally is working himself to the bone.

which is how he found himself laying on the floor of his apartment he shares with dongmin, phone held above his head as he watches the rest of a drama he started literally months ago. it took him months to finish the 12 episode drama and finally today, he was finishing. a frown resting on his face ( natural drama watching expression from yugyeom ) as he watched the main characters finally get together after the trails of love they went through.

tragic, and lovely.

just then his phone rang, the derpy photo of his hyung appearing on screen and almost starting the birthday boy enough to drop his phone--almost. luckily, he doesn’t and answers the calls after squinting at it for a long moment.

“seungmin hyun--”

“yah, kim yugyeom where are you?? did you forget we’re meeting for lunch??”

“oh... no i didn’t forget! i’m getting ready right now!” the dancer was quick to his feet, trying to make it sound like he wasn’t hurrying around. “i mean--i’m already on the way! where... are we meeting again?”

“aish... you brat...” the sound of his hyungs exasperation draws an amused smile to yugyeoms face. it’s been a few weeks since they last met up but the older always remains the same. and for some reason that means being exasperated with yugyeom.

“good thing for you, i’m in front of your building so get your ass down here in twenty minutes or i leave you behind, birthday or no birthday.” and just like that, seungmin hangs up. leaving yugyeom to chuckle to himself in amusement. same old hyung. but he does as told and starts getting ready--making sure to grab his bag he will need for busking later as well as the key to his studio where he keeps the speakers. it’s not far from his apartment but he rather not have to come all the way back here just to get his studio key.

twenty three minutes later he’s racing down the side walk chasing after his hyung who actually did walk away after twenty minutes.

3:36pm

“you should let me dress you up more often ~ you look so much nicer now, yugyeomie~ “ jaehee teases him as she fixes his makeup. using the chance when he wasn’t allowed to talk to say something that he would absolutely want to whine about.

he was still hanging out with seungmin--the older cleared his schedule today to spend time with yugyeom after having heard he would have been alone anyway. the past years this day was spent with all of dynamite but with hyunggu a trainee now.. well. and with seungmin came his girlfriend and former dynamite manager, jaehee. the older girl always doting upon and teasing him and hyunggu. like she is right now.

“you only ever wear teeshirts and jeans.” she continued her nagging, final touches on his hair and makeup being done along with her talking. and yugyeom merely took it like the good kid he was. ignoring the snickers from seungmin.

“there~ take a look!” she smiles, releasing yugyeom for him to get up and go over to the long mirror. he poses, taking in the outfit and the hair. she’s got him in black and white, hair done up, and smokey makeup. he looks...

“i look like barkhyun hyung from exo.” he mumbles, realizing thats who he has been styled after and he supposes that’s fitting as he does do a lot of exo covers during busking. jaehee laughs some where off to the side and he knows he’s right. he can’t complain though because he does look good. the outfit is a mix of seungmin’s stuff and his own stuff, though he really doesn’t have much.

“i expect those clothes back later.” seungmin calls as yugyeom goes to grab his busking stuff.

5:52pm

“anyway, i wanted to announce a new schedule for busking, im actually going to be picking up a few more days since i have started busking with *****.” he pauses as everyone cheers when they hear the name, though a fan near him mutters something that sounds like why did he get mentioned and yugyeom suppressed a sigh. especially when he hears seungmin cackle behind him.

that running theme of no one understanding him.

“yes yes, i’m going to start busking--” he drones on for another minute or two, and a couple of his regular fans start complaining as he apparently sounded even worse than normal which makes him chuckle as he continues. before he can get the next sentence out though, someone else is taking the mic from him and there’s a cheer from all the fans as hyunggu appears.

yugyeom’s eyes are wide as he see’s his best friend, so startled he doesn’t even react to the fact the mic had been taken. hyunggu explaining every thing he had said, and getting more cheers from the regulars.

“yah! kang hyunggu!” he gets out finally as the other comes to a stop. his fans laughing as they take in his affronted form. “you can’t just come in like that--’ he starts but the regulars who originally stanned hyunggu started complaining at him for scolding hyunggu which makes him pout. he turns towards them with puffy cheeks, but decides to let it go.

he is happy to see him, eyes bright as a smile finally forms and he finds himself hugging his best friend. a nice surprise on his birthday when he had been worried the two of them wouldn’t meet. as he closes up busking, he keeps an arm around the youngers shoulder, and only lets go when picture time starts.

during that time he does hear fans talking to hyunggu.

“it’s been so hard without you!”

“thank god youre here i havent understood anything in months”

“we just wait for the instagram post because we don’t know what he’s trying to tell us during busking.”

he can tell by the voices that it’s some of hyunggus regular fans, and it makes him pout a little. the pout staying on during a few photos because his fans find it adorable. but once he’s free a bit he does march over to hyunggu and his fans and whine at them. proceeding to get teased by everyone present.

busking ends though with a smile on his face, and a cart full of gifts from his fans. birthday busking is also profitable because of the gifts as well as the extra money, and he’s pretty sure they helped him pay rent this month around which would give him a lot of extra money for the days to come. part of why he was going to take up a few more days busking.

7:21pm

he comes home to a nice dinner made by his roommate and also another long time friend. the trainee surprised him with it and when he got back from busking and spending some time with the dynamite crew, being greeted with a good korean home cooked meal was a wonderful surprise.

it almost made him cry, if he was honest.

dinner with dongmin was great, he told the older all about busking that day and asked in return how training was going. he made sure to thank dongmin a thousand and one times for dinner. and by the time he finished, he was more than full. his stomach feeling almost too full as he flopped onto the floor into a similar position he had been this morning.

“hey, dongmin. do you think family can be more than blood?” he questions quietly, but he doesn’t wait for an answer. instead rolling over and shooting a smile to his roommate.

“thanks for dinner, again. really, minnie. today was the perfect day.”

and it was.

of all his birthdays ever, he would put this one on the top three list--if not the top number one. and it really was. tonight was ending on such a high note, he wasn’t sure he would be able to go through the week without missing today. but he thinks he can continue to live this way so long as he continues to have these amazing friends by his side.

#rkdongmin #rkkhg #;solo

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tidesreach · 6 years ago

Note

what are your top 5 clips/scenes from s2 of skam italia? (i know it's hard to choose)

This was incredibly difficult, anon. How dare you? But l gave it a good go. This took longer to answer than I intended because I am me and thus I could not stop prattling on. Sorry? But here we are:

1. La Grotta / Martino e Niccolò

Tied first place because it is impossible to separate them. I refuse. I know I have already talked everyone to death about both of these clips but I just adore them. Every single thing about them. They are so important. La Grotta took my breath away. Both Rocco and Fede did such an incredible job at conveying the emotion of this moment. Because the thing is, Marti's issue was never entirely to do with Nico having a mental illness. Despite what happened in Milan, Marti still wanted to see Nico, to know that he was okay. Marti's struggle was predominantly with the idea that Maddalena (*side-eyes*) planted in his head that Nico's illness somehow voided their relationship and his feelings for Marti. Nico's illness never made Marti love him any less. In fact, Marti was afraid of the opposite. That Nico's illness meant that Nico didn't love him. And all of that is just so apparent in this clip. Because as soon as Marti realises that Nico is truly in love with him, not even God himself can fucking stop him from getting to that terrace. The entire scene on the terrace is utterly heart-wrenching and breathtaking. One of the most beautiful things about that moment is that Marti does not stop smiling through it all. It is the most certain and understanding and reassuring smile. He looks at Nico with so much softness and conviction. Because he knows that Nico loves him now. And that's all that really matters. Yes, it's going to be tough. But it's worth every second. He breaks through Nico's shame. He literally kisses away his tears. He soothes Nico's deepest fears. And all Nico can do is watch in silent awe that this boy really exists in front of him. That Marti's not ashamed of him or abandoning him. Like, it's so beautiful? Everything about it is just so beautiful.

Martino e Niccolò is just as beautiful. I've talked about this before so I'm not going to write an essay, but Nico's fragile vulnerability hit me like a fucking train. I can feel every single moment of his conflict and shame in this scene. Of how utterly terrified he is of Marti witnessing a depressive episode. Terrified that he's going to drag Marti down with him and that Marti will inevitably end up hating him and leaving him. And Marti handles it with such care and reassurance. So much gentle certainty. I am truly in awe of that boy. He is such a grounding presence for Nico. It was so lovely to see Nico respond the way he did. Because despite how completely horrible he feels he manages to smile. And that's a wonderful thing.

(Also I love when Marti's on the phone to Maddi and she says, "It's not true that he only wants to be with you because of his illness" etc. Because Marti's face is so funny? His expression literally says, "Yeah, cheers, but I already fucking know that now. No thanks to you." In fact, he doesn't even dignify the comment with a response. I love you, Martino.)

2. Due Ore

I will never forget the night that clip dropped (or the previous night when we were all sat waiting for it and it didn't drop, what a fucking time). I love every single second of Due Ore. The atmosphere -- the feeling -- of that scene was just incredible. It was like an exhale. You could feel it. Could feel the relief, the finally, this is where we're supposed to be, after the tumultuous push-and-pull of the last couple of weeks. You could feel the inevitability of it when they were stood there staring at each other. Nico's nervous anticipatory smile as he waited for Marti to make the first move. Marti grinning back at him in earnest. They both knew that there needed to be an actual conversation at some point. But in that moment it just wasn't necessary. It could wait. Because everything was written on their faces. This is what I want. You are what I want. We talk about fate a lot with these two -- the red string of fate! -- and I never felt it more strongly than I did in this scene. You could almost see the damn string tying them together. It was inevitable and they both knew it.

3. Patatine e Marmellata

Getting to see them wake up together was such a blessing. The way Marti was sleeping on Nico's chest, gosh. They looked so peaceful and content. It was wonderful. And their conversation -- the conversation that they inevitably had to have -- about Maddalena was important. "I want to figure out how I feel for myself." It gave us an important insight into Nico's headspace and the way the people around him treat him and his illness. When Marti directly asks him how he feels, Nico's face just lights the fuck up. It hurts my heart a little. When was the last time someone asked him that without trying to dictate the answer for him? His soft, whispered answer of "You know perfectly well. And it's never happened to me before." He knows how he feels and he can finally say it and not have it questioned. Marti's smile and his little breath of a laugh -- like he just can't contain how delighted he is that they feel the same way -- before his "Me neither". And then of course, Buon Viaggo. The way they literally cannot stop grinning at one another. Their soft kisses in between serenading each other. I mean, you could not make this up. And god, the way Marti stares up at Nico when he starts singing absolutely floors me every time. He is so in love with him he is completely incapable of keeping it off his face. Then he just straight up calls him the man of his dreams. And not forgetting the boys and their incredible dance and sing-a-long while cleaning the kitchen. How was this clip even real? What a fucking blessing.

4. Nel Mio Letto

Soft Boyfriends(tm). This is always my first go-to clip when I'm feeling particularly awful. Because there is just something so incredibly comforting about it. It's like a warm blanket and a hot cup of tea on a bitter cold winter's day. I think it's to do with the cosy softness of it all. The way they're intertwined. The sleepy cuddles and kisses. The coffee. The coffee heart. The song. It's like a wonderful bubble of contentment. Like Nico's bed is its own little safe haven. I love the whole atmosphere of it. It really does feel like they are the only two people in the world. Which ties in perfectly with their conversation about the last man on earth. (Still sad they didn't get their three days in bed though.)

5. Halloween

HALLOWEEN. Everything about this is iconic. The giraffes on the beer glasses? Marti dramatically ditching his mask in front of the Catholic church? The lighting in the pool? That shot of them underwater where they're surrounded by an endless expanse of water like they're in the ocean? Nico somehow managing to never stop fucking smiling at Marti even when trying to hold his breath underwater? I love that Skam Italia managed to make the pool scene their own. It was a world away from the OG scene (in the sense that it has a completely different feel to it) and I love that. I love that they're both essentially the same scene but evoke so many different emotions. There was this sort of giddy anticipatory feeling with Marti and Nico. Their kiss was like taking that first breath after being underwater for so long. The way they clung to each other? The way they were so in awe of each other? Like in Due Ore there was that overwhelming feeling of joy and relief. Finally.

Honorary mentions, because just five is too hard:

Tu Non Sei di Milano

It feels a little bizarre to call it a favourite clip. It would perhaps be more accurate to say that it is a clip that particularly resonated with me. I have only watched this clip in its entirety three times. The first time I was on a bus to London -- frankly I should have known better than to watch it in public -- and I almost had a panic attack while watching it. I sobbed in a public bathroom for a good twenty minutes, it was quite the day. Because I recognised so much of myself in Nico and his behaviour and I felt so much empathy for him. It hit me like a fucking train. It was the most difficult clip to watch, but it was also incredibly important. It took me a long time to rewatch it. The second and third times were difficult too. But also cathartic in a way. When you suffer from an illness like BPD, it can be incredibly isolating. You can feel like there is no one else in the world who can possibly understand what you're going through or what it feels like. Sometimes I think, "I'm ridiculous. No one else does this crazy shit. Why am I like this? Why can't I just snap the fuck out of it?" Watching that clip was validating in a lot of respects. It was difficult to watch but it also reminded me that I am not alone. That there are other people out there who experience the same struggles that I do. Who battle with episodes like this too. It was an incredibly tough watch, but it was so important.

Also, veering away from the more painful aspects of that clip: I absolutely love the way Nico seduced Marti in front of that damn neon light. Marti's soft and naive voice when he's attempting to read the "how fun". Nico's "no, no, it says Marti and Nico" and insisting Marti look again just so he can catch him by surprise in a kiss. Those achingly slow and soft kisses they exchange are probably my favourite kisses of theirs. That scene was just so intimate and beautifully done.

Vediamo

One of my favourite things about this season is the dynamic between Marti and his mother. It was so lovely to watch them heal and slowly but surely repair their relationship. Vediamo really captured the essence of that. Marti's misplaced anger towards his mother during the fallout of Milan. The brutal yelling. The way they both sit on opposite sides of the door. Marti's quiet and tearful "Are you sitting there?" His mum asking him if he thinks she would have a problem with it and then her sobbing "You are the most important thing in my life." The two of them just bloody sobbing on either side of the door. I am tearing up thinking about it. Good grief. I absolutely adore Mamma Rametta. And of course, "Vediamo" and her calling it Martinese for "No." Their tearful laughter. I love it so much. They have their ups and downs but they really do love each other unconditionally.

Effettivamente

This might just be one of my favourite coming out scenes that I have ever witnessed. Fede did such a wonderful job at conveying Marti's inner struggle. The way Marti has to fight to get the words out. The way he falters a little when he says "It's not a girl." It makes my own heart falter every single fucking time I watch it. You can see him wrestling with the words. And Gio, darling Gio. I love Giovanni Garau with a U (it's Sardinian), resident Love Wizard. He's such a wonderful friend and I just really adore the way he handles it. The way he stops playing FIFA to give Marti his full attention. That wonderful and supportive smile of his. How he asks questions about Niccolò and lets Marti get out some of the shit he's been holding onto. He really puts Marti at ease. You can see the relief seep into Marti's body when he realises that nothing is going to change between them because of this. Marti's huge smile when Gio says "He needs to leave his girlfriend" and then ruffles Marti's hair. I love supportive best friends.

And there you have it. Sorry, you asked for five and I gave you about nine. You probably didn't want a novel. But what can I say? I have a lot of love to share.

#skam italia #aela answers things #do i ever shut up?#skam italia: thoughts

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artificialqueens · 6 years ago

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Extra Credit: Part 7 (Shalaska) – Rosie

A/N: TWO Extra Credit updates in ONE month?? It’s more likely than you think.

I need to give the biggest thank you to Lyd @pianowired for being my beta for this chapter! I really needed a second pair of eyes and she picked up a million typos and flagged my clunky af sentences so I can’t thank her enough!

Summary: University Professor Sharon Needles hooks up with a slamming hot blonde at a bar who may or may not be one of her students.

Chapter Summary: It’s the fall semester break! Juicy things happen! This chapter is 7.8k words! Come talk to me at my sideblog @aqrosie! Enjoy!

Previous Chapters: One, Two, Three, Four, Five and Six

“So I just stir it like this?” Alaska asked, looking to Sharon for guidance as she mixed their pasta through the boiling water. She was taking her job of making sure the pasta didn’t stick together very seriously.

“Yeah, that’s perfect,” Sharon confirmed, kissing Alaska’s hair before she moved to open the pantry door.

Alaska smiled, a little bit in love with the scene around her. Maybe a little was a huge understatement. They were half way through their fall break together, an entire week of just the two of them. While the thought of a seven-day date in theory should have freaked Alaska out, she had never felt so safe around someone until she met Sharon, or more at home than in her apartment.

The only down side was the week was running away from her at lightning speed.

Between sleeping together and actually literally sleeping together, they had spent the last few days cuddled up on the couch, showing each their favourite movies while Cerrone purred under their comforting pets. Then there were all the Polaroids.

As Alaska had packed her bag for the break, she had thrown her little baby pink instant camera in at the last minute on a whim. But one night when she wanted to take a selfie with Sharon to capture the moment, her professor had coiled away in fear.

“No,” Sharon said boldly. “Nothing electronic. No proof. No footprint. We can’t afford for this to get out.”

Alaska had agreed immediately, ignoring her heart crushing slightly at the shitty reality of having to be responsible. But hilariously, the situation was salvaged when Sharon scoffed and said “I mean if we had a Polaroid camera or something not digital we could try but—“

She stopped talking when Alaska really did pull out a Polaroid camera, looking like a smug Mary Poppins as she did so.

“Bullshit!” Sharon exclaimed in astonishment, completely missing the youthful resurrection of the retro gadget in recent years due to her age.

They had spent the rest of the night taking cute photos together, first a nice smiley one, then one of Sharon kissing Alaska’s cheek, then a candid laughing one which has become Alaska’s favourite. In it Sharon’s throwing her head back and Alaska’s face is tilting out of the frame as she cackled. Then they took photos of each other, a couple silly ones and a couple caught off guard, which look amusingly ‘indie’ and ‘poetic’. That became one of their favourite nights together so far. Sharon loved every part of it; how they bonded, how the sound of the film being processed brought her way back in the best possible way, how they could let loose, how they now had little mementos of themselves to physically hold onto. Alaska loved it too, but mainly because of Sharon. Seeing her face light up at the whole process was heartwarming, and she loved every minute of it.

Eventually they had run out of film, and while it was on the shopping list to buy more, the bunch of polaroids they had were now dotted around the apartment. Sharon had one on her bedside table and another placed in the frame of her vanity mirror. There were a series of three on the fridge, and when Alaska went into the office to grab a pen, she noticed a candid one of herself on Sharon’s desk too, propped up against the stand of her sleek desktop Mac.

Alaska had her own collection going, but she knew when she got back to the dorm she wouldn’t be able to proudly decorate her room with them. She kept her collection in a clean sock, a hair tie keeping them bundled together. She tucked them away in her bag, out of sight, as if they were more precious than money. Well, not like; they were more precious.

But she kept her favourite shot of them, the laughing one, inside her phone case. She had to pry it apart to get it out to look at it, but every time she did she couldn’t help but smile, as if the happiness felt in that moment was contagious.

“Do you know how to test if pasta is done?” Sharon asked, throwing a tea towel over her shoulder and wrapping a hand around the younger girl’s waist as she supervised Alaska’s oh-so-difficult stirring.

Alaska bit her lip as she smiled, managing to look even more adorable as she shook her head, her high ponytail swinging and her white apron-clad body wiggling slightly as she moved. There was a tiny smear of flour on her cheek from when they made the pasta earlier, and the hand that wasn’t stirring the ladle had a thin layer of dough caked on her fingers, making her stick them out daintily in the air.

A feeling had thudded in Sharon’s heart all afternoon as they made the pasta together from scratch, laughing as Sharon taught Alaska a thing or twenty about cooking. The feeling almost vibrated between the chambers of her heart, bouncing around and growing stronger the more time she spent with Alaska. She knew what it meant, and the feeling wanted to jump up through her throat. But instead she swallowed it back, something telling her the moment wasn’t completely right.

“Don’t you like… squeeze it?” Alaska attempted before laughing at her lack of expertise.

“Mmh, kind of,” Sharon laughed, nudging Alaska’s hand up to bring the ladle full of pasta out of the water before quickly grabbing a strand. “Or you could do this.”

Sharon swiftly threw the wet string of spaghetti against the glass splashback, Alaska watching in shock as it stuck.

“Oh my god!” Alaska exclaimed, bouncing on her toes. “Can I try?”

“Of course,” Sharon encouraged, taking the ladle from her hand. “Grab a strand, maybe that one hanging there, come on, quickly—“

“I’m trying!” Alaska squealed, her laughter getting in the way of her fingertips grasping at the hot, wet spaghetti. Once she finally pulled a strand loose, she lumped it at the glass surface adjacent to the stove and cackled when it limply fell down.

“Aw, me too, girl,” Alaska drawled, picking up the strand before chucking it into the sink.

“One more try,” Sharon prompted, dunking the spaghetti into the water before bringing it to the surface.

“No…” Alaska whined, “I can’t do it. You make it look so easy.”

“Oh my god Alaska yes you can, throw a damn noodle before we overdo them,” Sharon ordered in mock seriousness, which only served to dissolve Alaska into more giggles.

She shakily pulled another strand from the heap and threw it at the wall, her eyes widening as the noodle stuck proudly to the glass surface before she shrieked.

“Oh my god, I did it!” Alaska lit up, clapping for herself as Sharon cheered.

Sharon’s heart skipped a beat as she watched Alaska, all smiley and overwhelmed with excitement at her little noodle sticking to the wall.

I’m so in love with you, Sharon thought.

“Now take it off the stove,” Sharon said after a moment, the feeling in her heart inflating by the second.

She was so ridiculously in love with Alaska, and the sensation of the realisation almost brought tears to her eyes.

Alaska didn’t notice the slight shake in her girlfriend’s voice as she concentrated on draining the pasta, the almost blinding steam giving Sharon a moment to rapidly blink away the moisture in her eyes.

“Aw, I’m so proud!” Alaska said as they plated up two beautiful bowls of pasta, complete with delicious red sauce and topped with fresh basil.

“You should be,” Sharon said honestly, refilling their glasses of wine.

Alaska wrapped her arms around Sharon’s waist before looking up at her.

“Thank you so much for teaching me how to make something,” Alaska drawled, her voice dripping with affection. “I love it so much.”

Three words rested on Sharon’s tongue, but as she opened her mouth, they halted, running into each other before collapsing into a heap behind her teeth.

Instead she kissed Alaska, bringing their lips together and communicating what her vocal chords couldn’t yet manage.

Alaska kissed her back, her eyelids fluttering shut as she melted into their embrace, unaware of the unspoken confession rolling off Sharon’s tongue and onto hers.

“I have a date,” Dorothy said.

“With a man?” Blanche asked inquisitively.

“No,” Dorothy replied, ready to deliver another signature zinger.

“With a Venus flytrap,” Alaska said in sync with her favourite character. Even half asleep she could recite every line from her most beloved show.

She giggled softly from her reclined position on Sharon’s couch, her body practically one with the soft cushions as she approached her fourth episode in a row.

It was Friday afternoon, and Sharon had become inundated with emails from colleagues ahead of a Saturday morning faculty meeting to regroup for the remainder of the semester. Alaska craned her neck slightly to see Sharon in the office, stretching her arms above her head before returning to rapidly type away on her keyboard.

Alaska had gone in before, planting another cup of coffee down beside her and another kiss atop her head. Sharon had hugged her and apologised yet again for having to do work during their break together. But Alaska didn’t mind at all. Just being able to chill somewhere peaceful, away from her parents, the campus and any university responsibilities, was a holiday in itself.

Suddenly, she opened her eyes, and Sharon was perched on the coffee table beside her, gently nudging her awake.

“Come on baby,” she said while smiling softly, “have a nap in the bedroom. I know from experience you’re gonna get a sore neck from this couch. Trust me.”

Alaska cleared her throat as the laugh track sounded from the TV, realising she had nodded off. She stubbornly didn’t want to sleep, and was too lazy to leave her sprawled position, but curling up in their sheets did sound awfully inviting. She let Sharon help haul her up from the couch before the older woman wrapped an arm around her waist and turned The Golden Girls off.

Climbing into bed, Alaska snuggled under the covers as Sharon drew the curtains, darkening the room around them. Alaska couldn’t help but sigh as she was enveloped in the delicious embrace of their bedding, the subtle scent of Sharon infused into the sheets swirling around her. Sharon kissed her on the forehead, the both of them enjoying the rare, comforting act of her tucking the other girl in.

“Nap with me,” Alaska said quietly as Sharon pulled away.

“I have a bit left, I’m almost done…” Sharon considered, before a yawn swallowed the rest of her sentence.

“Come on, you deserve a break.”

Sharon wasn’t one to argue. She gingerly climbed over Alaska, spooning her on top of the sheets as Alaska curled up underneath them.

“Five minutes,” Sharon told herself, letting her eyelids flutter shut as she hugged Alaska, her arm draping over her waist as her left thigh rested between Alaska’s legs.

The quietest moan escaped Sharon’s lips. It was like being lowered into a hot bath; her muscles relaxed and the tension around her shoulders evaporated. Their breathing synchronised effortlessly, Sharon’s lungs expanding as Alaska exhaled.

A small smile tugged at Alaska’s mouth. Why didn’t they mutually nap more often? In a weird way, Sharon’s gentle waves of breath against her neck and their bodies pressed together felt just as intimate as sex, but in a different way.

In what felt like as close to experiencing an epiphany as Alaska thought she would ever get, something came over her. With her eyes closed, her mind hurtled through time and she found herself envisioning moments like this more often.

Alaska had fantasised about a future with Sharon. This thought process wasn’t new. But instead of picturing how they would decorate their apartment together or frolicking around on the beach in the sun, hand in hand and in public, Alaska was suddenly picturing introducing Sharon to her parents, family roasts on a Sunday, and Christmases together. She was picturing a proper house, a yard, another cat, a dog, a baby. And while it all seemed so far away, what was once a terrifying concept of commitment was now not just something she wanted, but something that felt right.

Oh my god, Alaska realised, I’m so in love with you.

And just like that, her futuristic montage ended. With her body still, she opened her eyes, noticing that they were a little misty. Now out of her thoughts and back in Sharon’s arms, she noticed the deep, even breathing from the other woman, and how heavy her limbs felt pressed against her.

Alaska bit her lip to hold back her smile.

Sharon had fallen asleep, and the precious moment warmed her soul. She suddenly remembered how in Grade 7 she went over to a friend’s house and held their new little kitten in her lap, which promptly fell asleep under her gentle pets.

Alaska closed her eyes as sleep tapped at her eyelids and begged to be welcomed in. Before she allowed herself to slip into unconsciousness, one thought hung in her mind.

I love you, Sharon Needles.

“… and then I bought this Marc Jacobs bronzer,” Courtney rattled off, opening the sleek white compact and extending it towards Alaska, who was sitting cross-legged on her bed opposite her dorm roommate and best friend. “Here, smell it, it smells like coconut!”

Alaska leaned in and took a whiff, smelling a mix of makeup, coconut, and luxury.

“Ugh, stunning,” Alaska commented, thoroughly enjoying Courtney’s fall break makeup haul and living vicariously through her as she pulled out goodies from the black and white Sephora bag, where the price tag was well into the hundreds.

“I think that’s it?” Courtney questioned, frowning at the spread of palettes, highlighters, and lipsticks on her bed. “Oh and that Anastasia gloss I showed you on Snap! But it’s already in my purse.”

“You did well, Court,” Alaska smiled, standing up to finally begin unpacking. Their room was a mess, with the floor covered in clothes and their beds covered in everything else – including makeup, snacks, books, and even a kettle Courtney had brought from home.

“I still can’t believe you did zero shopping on the break,” Courtney shook her head, “I thought your splurge was going to rival mine!”

Alaska laughed and shrugged her shoulders vaguely, knowing her at times aloof personality would excuse her lack of details.

“Oh, you know,” Alaska rambled, hanging one creased T-shirt onto a hanger and laying back down after her hard work, “I just hung out with the fam, baked a lot with mom, cuddled little Poundcake.”

“Aw,” Courtney said, swatching a gold eyeshadow on the back of her hand. “Yeah I saw those cookies on Snap.”

“Oh yeah!” Alaska forgot she sent Courtney pre-planned photos to cover her tracks.

God I’m good, she thought smugly, picking up her phone to open Instagram.

“I just don’t get how you say you were home, when you were actually here in Pittsburgh.”

Alaska froze.

From her peripheral vision she saw Courtney lift her head to look at her best friend.

“What?” Alaska croaked, the word barely making it out through her tight throat.

She could just feel how scared her face looked. Her cheeks turned hot and the dorm bedroom began to spin slightly.

How did Courtney know?

“I saw on Snap Map,” Courtney revealed, reading her mind.

Alaska closed her eyes. She was so fucking stupid. It never crossed her mind to turn off her location on the app. It didn’t matter how savvy she thought she was, or how many photos she staged. She had fucked up her entire plan.

“So… where actually were you?” Courtney asked quietly. She swatched another shade on her hand.

For a fleeting moment Alaska considered lying to one of her closest friends. Saying it was a glitch, accuse her of being crazy, but she couldn’t. They both knew it wasn’t a glitch. And there was something in Courtney’s voice, the hushed vulnerability, that made Alaska realise there was more to this than she first realised.

“I just—!“ Courtney said abruptly, taking Alaska’s silence as a moment to open up, before regretting it but continuing away, desperate to get her bottled up thoughts out. She kept looking down at her hand. “I just, I don’t know what’s going on with you lately. Well I think I do, but I don’t. But I know that you haven’t been as close with me, like ever since the semester started you’ve been weird and distant and I feel terrible for saying that because what if you’re going through shit I don’t know about? But then I think, you’ve always told me if you’re going through shit, so why am I so in the dark? And—“

“Courtney,” Alaska stood to interrupt her frantic friend, watching as she wound herself up and rapidly blended the gold shadow into her hand.

Courtney finally paused and took in a deep breath.

With wide eyes she looked up at Alaska standing above her, the both of them a little taken aback at her outpour. And suddenly the two of them couldn’t stop laughing. Alaska literally doubled over, grabbing her knees for support as she cackled, while Courtney couldn’t help but roll onto her side as she shrieked, before moving when she realised she was on top of her expensive makeup.

While some tension still lingered in the room, the majority of it evaporated when Alaska sat down next to Courtney and wrapped her arms around her.

“I’m sorry,” Alaska started.

“No, I’m sorry,” Courtney had to apologise. “I don’t know what came over me.”

“No,” Alaska shook her head. She needed to come clean. She had been so wrapped up in herself and Sharon that she had forgotten other people, their emotions, actions and relationships with her, still existed. “You’re right. I’ve been shady as fuck recently.”

“Why?” Courtney asked, and Alaska wanted to rest her head on her shoulder when she heard the concern in her voice. “Is everything okay?”

“Oh yeah,” Alaska assured her. “Things are great, it’s just…” Alaska didn’t even know where to begin.

“Are you… in a relationship?” Courtney asked outright, taking Alaska off guard.

“Is it that obvious?” Alaska drawled. She was going to be in so much shit with Sharon, but she was trying to not think about it.

“Well, you’ve had a surge of hickies on your neck in recent weeks so it wasn’t too far-fetched of a guess. But aww!” Courtney squealed, wrapping her arms around Alaska. “That’s wonderful! With who? What’s their name? From uni? Do I know them? Oh my god, tell me it’s not Derrick—“

“It’s not Derrick,” Alaska said immediately, making them both laugh.

“Then who is it?” Courtney asked.

Alaska squeezed her lips together, as if she was trying to stop herself from throwing up. Maybe she was.

“I don’t want to say yet…” Alaska eventually said. “I don’t know! We’re just like, not official yet, you know? It’s still really early days… and I don’t want to make a big deal in case things don’t actually end up working out with her.”

“Oh, her!” Courtney sighed, her smile beaming and her eyes soft.

Alaska couldn’t help but smile, and when she did, she couldn’t stop. They laughed again, and Courtney literally shook Alaska’s shoulders.

“Look at you!” Courtney gushed. “You’re glowing! She’s in love!”

Alaska covered her face with her hands before pulling away and shrieking with joy. It felt so liberating to have Courtney know, and to share in what she was feeling. She was in love, and she couldn’t bring herself to deny it.

“So is that who you stayed with during the break?”

“Yeah,” Alaska said, wondering how much she could reveal without revealing it all.

“Wow, I mean that’s great your parents let you stay with her, even though it’s only early days.”

Alaska murmured in agreement.

“Oh my god, they don’t know,” Courtney concluded, reading Alaska like a book.

“No, they don’t, and you can’t tell them—“

“Like I would tell them!” Courtney exclaimed. “I’m not a mole.“

“Fuck awf, ya dog arsed mole,” they both said in unison, quoting an iconic Courtney line she slurred while drunk at a handsy frat boy during one of their campus parties back in first year.

“Aw, I feel like the old you is back,” Courtney thought, going back to her makeup as Alaska stood up and picked another shirt up from the floor. “Not that I don’t enjoy loved-up Alaska, but loved up Alaska is a sneaky snake.”

“I’m sorry for not being honest with you, I didn’t realise how shit it looked on my end.”

“No, it’s okay! I can see why you’d want to keep it quiet at the start,” Courtney agreed. “I felt bad for bringing it up, but when I saw snaps from you at home but it said you were still here, I just had to mention it. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“No, don’t feel bad, I would have done the same,” Alaska said. In fact, Alaska would have mentioned it much earlier if she suspected one of her friends was attempting to pull a fast one and conceal a hidden romance.

“So we’re good?” Courtney asked.

“We’re great,” Alaska smiled, walking the short distance from her closet to hug Courtney.

“Right, I need to wash my hair,” Courtney announced, grabbing her towel and toiletries bag. “Gotta look stunning for 8am tomorrow.“

“Ugh,” Alaska whined, not ready for Monday. “I forgot tomorrow was an 8am start.”

“Yep,” Courtney said, double-checking their timetables sticky taped on the back of their door on her way out. “Bright and early tomorrow at 8am, Strategic Marketing with Professor Sharon Needles.”

Alaska forced herself not to laugh and instead turned to face her wardrobe as Courtney left the room, only to return seconds later.

“Forgot my damn shower sandals,” she added, rummaging around her wardrobe. “Oh, and there’s no rush, but I’d love to meet your mystery woman! Bring her out to drinks when it’s right! I’m sure she’ll fit right in with the gang!”

“Aw,” Alaska nodded, holding back a laugh at the thought of Sharon clinking drink with her friends at the uni bar while Courtney took an oh so original Boomerang. “Thanks, Court.”

Courtney left again, and it was only when the door finally shut and she didn’t immediately return for another forgotten item did Alaska let herself collapse on her bed. She had so much to tell Sharon, but just like the revision quiz was she meant to be studying for, that problem could wait for tomorrow.

“Honey, I’m home!” Sharon announced as she closed her apartment door behind her upon spotting Alaska pottering around in the open plan kitchen.

“Sweetie!” Alaska replied, both of them laughing at the stereotypical sitcom trope.

“How’s my baby?” Sharon asked softly after pecking Alaska on the lips.

“Good,” Alaska smiled, busying herself by wiping down a mug that was already dry.

She swallowed dryly, attempting to calm her nerves as Sharon kicked off her heels and made herself comfortable, knowing her bombshell was only going to cause tension.

“Fuck, that 8am was a killer, but we had a pretty decent turn out. And people actually laughed at my jokes!” Sharon exclaimed, rinsing her coffee Keep Cup in the sink. “What a win!”

“I always laugh at your jokes,” Alaska smiled, wrapping her arms around her waist from behind. “They’re funny.”

“Aw, I know you do, I see you sitting there in the front row smiling down at your laptop,” Sharon cooed. “Also I’m really craving pumpkin risotto tonight so I hope you are too.”

“Sounds delish,” Alaska drawled, distracted. She was trying to find the perfect moment to tell Sharon, but she knew she just had to get the words out.

“I’m gonna get started on it now so we can have an early dinner and you can get back to the dorm in good time,” Sharon planned, pulling out pots and pans.

“Sounds good,” Alaska replied, opening the fridge and helping bring out ingredients, deciding then and there to break the news when Sharon was warm, well-fed and happy on wine.

Almost an hour later, the moment arrived. They were cuddled on the couch, their dirty dinner dishes forgotten in the sink and their wine glasses running low on the coffee table. Sharon’s lips were against her neck as her hand massaged Alaska, under her skirt but over her underwear.

It was slow and sensual, relaxing and comforting, everything they both normally loved, especially as a way to unwind after a Monday.

But Alaska couldn’t relax.

What she didn’t know, however, was that Sharon could sense it too.

“What’s on your mind, love?” Sharon asked gently, pulling back as she moved her hand to rest on Alaska’s waist.

“What?” Alaska said in surprise. “Nothing."

“Okay,” Sharon said uncertainly. “You sure? You’re just… a little tense.”

It was almost comical the way they watched Alaska’s body suddenly sag as she forced herself to relax.

“We can stop,” Sharon said, wide eyed as she moved her hands from Alaska. “Like if you’re not comfortable I totally understand and we can stop—“

“No, Sharon, baby, that’s not it, I promise” Alaska reassured her, her heart warming at Sharon being so considerate. “It’s not you.”

Sharon nodded, sensing Alaska was genuine.

“Then what?”

It was now or never.

“In… a series of events…” Alaska started, not knowing how to phrase it. “Courtney found out.”

Alaska knew this was going to be hard, but she wasn’t prepared.

“What!?”

Sharon sat frozen, before she ripped her hands from Alaska and stood up quickly, pacing the room before Alaska could get a second word in.

“How does she know? What the fuck. Who told her? Did you tell her? Who else knows? Oh my fucking god—“

“Sharon I didn’t tell her!” Alaska had to interrupt, quickly standing up to match Sharon’s height, and to shake her shoulders if need be. “I would never tell her!”

“But she knows about us!?” Sharon exclaimed, whipping around to face Alaska. Her blue eyes were already brimming with moisture, and the sharp spike in emotion wasn’t something Alaska expected.

“No! Only that I’m seeing someone!” Alaska exclaimed back, moving to touch Sharon, who only shrugged her embrace away. Alaska fiddled with her hands instead, noticing how Sharon’s were shaking in response.

“Fuck me,” Sharon sighed, her shoulders slumping in relief as the situation became clearer, “you really should have fucking led with that information.”

Alaska nodded, knowing she had screwed up the delivery. She was just so nervous and overwhelmed that she had momentarily forgotten a key detail.

They stood in silence, Alaska waiting for Sharon to ask the questions, which she did.

“Does she have any idea at all that it’s me?” Sharon asked, her hands on her hips as she stood in her office clothes, looking like she was in the middle of a high stress meeting.

“No, not at all,” Alaska answered. “She told me she hoped it wasn’t Derrick.”

Sharon made a face.

“Does anyone else know you’re in a relationship?”

“No,” Alaska answered. “But Courtney might talk… but she’s very loyal! …But was also very excited.”

“I don’t want your little friends to try and bust this case wide open,” Sharon ran her hands through her hair, pulling at her roots before dropping them completely and smacking her pencil skirt in the process.

“I can make Courtney promise not to tell,” Alaska attempted, not even taking offense to the ‘little friends’ jab. Alaska knew how immature they probably came across to Sharon, and she wasn’t about to start another argument.

“Yeah well fuckin’… college girl promises might not be kept.”

There was more silence, and Alaska bit her lip, looking at a still Sharon who stared at the ground, practically hearing the gears turning in her head.

“How did she find out, anyway?” Sharon questioned.

Fuck, Alaska thought.

“I… um, there’s this feature… on Snapchat, where they use your GPS location… and everyone is on this big map,” Alaska explained, looking at the floor instead of matching Sharon’s erratic gaze. “And… over the break I was sending Courtney photos of my mom’s baking and my little cat, saying I was back home.”

Alaska ignored her the shake in her voice. She was so fucking scared to tell Sharon.

“But… I forgot to turn my location off, so Courtney saw I was still here in Pittsburg—"

She heard Sharon inhale sharply.

“… And she asked me why I lied, and then guessed I was seeing someone… so now she knows.”

Alaska didn’t lift her head to see the look on Sharon’s face. She couldn’t. But before she could even respond, Sharon left. Alaska watched as her feet walked away, down the hallway, before she heard the sound of their bedroom door close.

She found a small comfort in the fact that Sharon didn’t slam it shut.

Standing there, Alaska cried, letting the tears she had held back all night finally fall. She waited, straining to hear any sound come from Sharon’s room, or to see her re-emerge. But there was nothing.

She knew she had fucked up, she knew this was her fault. But it felt like her heart was being crushed. This was their first ever fight, or conflict, at least. She wished for nothing more than to be back on the couch with Sharon, their bodies intertwined as they kissed.

Alaska paced around, not knowing what to do with herself now that she had calmed down. It was only just past 7pm, and she had told her dorm supervisor she would be back right before their 9pm cut off after ‘visiting her grandma, who happens to live in the area’.

She wrung her hands, not wanting to knock on Sharon’s door just yet. To distract herself, she did the dishes, the hot water softening her skin and soothing her senses. But as she stacked dishes, she smelt the faint scent of smoke. Suddenly on edge, Alaska looked around, inspecting the oven, toaster and microwave and wondering if anything was burning. But they were all empty.

She walked into the living room, sniffing the air and trying to hunt down the source. It was coming from outside, so she immediately suspected a forest fire, or perhaps someone getting too keen with their chimney.

Opening the sliding glass door, she stepped onto the dark balcony before jumping back.

“Oh, sorry!” Alaska exclaimed upon seeing Sharon leaning against the railing, a lit cigarette perched between her fingertips as her silvery blonde hair blew gently in the night breeze.

Sharon jumped too, the interruption ripping her from her deep train of thought. She almost knocked her orange Halloween-themed glass ashtray off the railing in the process, but thankfully grabbed it just in time.

“Oh my god, you spooked me,” Sharon whispered, clutching her chest and taking a drag.

“I thought you were unspookable,” Alaska said, standing in the doorway.

She noticed Sharon had entered the balcony from her bedroom’s glass door, which explained the silence.

“I’ll go,” Alaska said. But she didn’t go. Instead, they stood there, the traffic from the ground filling the silence.

Alaska spoke again. “I didn’t know you smoked.”

“It’s a filthy habit, it’s gross, I’m really trying to quit,” Sharon explained quickly, hovering her hand around the ashtray as if to show she was about to stub it out.

“I’ll stop in a sec,” she instead said coyly, taking one last, long drag. “I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean to get the smoke in. I know how gross it smells.”

Alaska was surprised at how apologetic Sharon was, and even more surprised at how she assumed Alaska was so against smoking. Which, on second thought, she was. But there was something so seductive about the way the embers from the lit end flickered in Sharon’s blue eyes, and how the smoke trailed up from her parted red lips.

“Oh, no,” Alaska stammered, physically shaking her head out of her trance. “I actually kind of like the smell of cigarettes.”

Sharon cocked her head to the side, smiling before stubbing it out.

“It’s like, comforting,” Alaska said bashfully, stepping out and joining Sharon now that the tension was gone.

Sharon felt a pang in her heart when she realised Alaska’s eyes were red-rimmed, and that her reaction had caused her pain.

She wrapped her arms around the younger girl to hold her, squeezing her as she felt Alaska squeeze back.

“I’m so sorry,” Sharon apologised, her words muffled as she spoke into Alaska’s hair.

“No, I’m sorry,” Alaska said, tilting her head up and looking at Sharon. “It was my mistake, I fucked up.”

“But I blew up.”

“Only because I screwed up again and didn’t tell you Courtney doesn’t know it’s you.”

They stood together, their arms wrapped around each other until they finally broke apart. Alaska lowered herself down on the two-person outdoor loveseat just behind them, and Sharon joined her.

“I just freaked the fuck out,” Sharon sighed.

“But like, rightly so,” Alaska replied, lacing her fingers with Sharon’s.

“It’s just,” Sharon started, “I know it’s only Courtney, but the more people who know, the more chance there is of this getting out, and if this gets out, everything will be ruined and I might not get to see you anymore and I know we’re both adults but we both knew the consequences of this and someone else knowing just makes this all so real and—“

“Sharon,” Alaska tried to interrupt.

“No, let me finish,” Sharon said, her heart pounding as the words poured out of her. “It’s all just hitting me now how real this all is and I’ve always cared about you and loved you but I need to tell you now that I’m so fucking in love with you, you have no idea, and the thought of losing you is my biggest fear. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I’ll be damned if I don’t get to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Alaska was silent, watching as Sharon finally took a deep breath. Realising her outpouring of emotions was over, Alaska’s face broke into a smile, which practically lit up the night sky.

“You love me?” Alaska whispered.

“So much,” Sharon whispered back, their lips centimetres apart.

“I love you too,” Alaska announced. “I’ve loved you for what feels like forever, and I know that sounds cheesy as fuck but lately I haven’t been able to imagine my life with anyone else. I wish we could go out and have brunch and take photos of it like Ivy and Jinkx, or go to museums and take photos of each other looking at art like Shea and Sasha, but I care so much more about you and us and our relationship, that having it get out isn’t what I want either. I just want you. I love you, Sharon, so much."

Sharon’s heart melted, and it was only when she blinked and her vision warped did she realise she had tears in her eyes.

Their lips met, passion exploding from their hearts and communicating so much more than what words could. Alaska’s fingers tangled in Sharon’s hair as Sharon’s tongue lapped against hers, a smokey aftertaste underpinning their embrace. They stayed like that on the balcony until they couldn’t anymore, Sharon’s arm wrapped around Alaska as they shared kisses and looked up at the stars, their hearts so full of love that they felt like they could ascend into the galaxy above them and shine together. While Courtney knowing of a relationship changed things, it only made their actions more secretive, their time together more precious, and their feelings for each other more raw and powerful. Sharon looked to the stars, knowing as long as no one else knew, things were going to be okay.

“So, when am I meeting your girlfriend?” Willam asked offhandedly, unassumedly picking up the soy sauce bottle as she eyed her colleague and closest friend

The avocado sushi grasped between Sharon’s wooden chopsticks fell to her plate as she stared wide eyed at Willam across the small table, her whole body frozen as the sushi train continued to politely glide around them.

“How do you know?” Sharon breathed.

“Oh my god,” Willam exclaimed, lowering her voice as she smiled with glee. “It was just a hunch. But you didn’t deny it. Holy shit."

Fuck fuck fuck, Sharon thought.

Like a ridiculous unbalanced seesaw, Willam’s expression became more excited as Sharon’s dawned in horror.

“You’re a fool, Needles, a damn fool,” Willam laughed. “Walked right into that one.”

Sharon ran an anxious hand through her hair, suddenly forgetting about her luch and looking at the other diners around them, on alert for any one of them to turn around and suddenly start publically shaming her for shagging a student.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Willam said softly, not expecting Sharon’s withdrawn, uncharacteristic reaction.

There was always a little chemistry between them that kept things exciting, but Willam and Sharon were close friends first. Best friends, even. They shared so many of the same interests, and both being lesbians was the final bond in their valuable, female friendship. It wasn’t unusual for them to discuss their relationships, ask for advice, or delve into the details of a recent hook-up. But Willam had noticed a change over the past few months. There were no more one-night stand reviews during their Monday lunchtime catch-ups (at least, not on Sharon’s behalf. Willam was still pulling her weight.)

Except, there was someone. Willam just knew. She didn’t miss the goofy smile from Sharon when her phone would light up during a faculty meeting, and how it wouldn’t leave her face until long after she’d locked her home screen. She didn’t miss the way Sharon claimed the love bite on her neck was a curling iron burn, when her hair that day was actually dead straight. She didn’t miss the way Sharon laughed louder and hugged Willam a little bit longer.

She seemed loved-up. She seemed happy.

And by the way she was currently acting, Willam was right.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to divulge into all the details,” Willam backtracked. She sensed Sharon’s hostility, but it only made her more curious.

“No, it’s okay,” Sharon lied, recalling the story Alaska had fed Courtney the night before. “We’re just… not official. I don’t know. I don’t know what we are at the moment, so I don’t really want to talk about it and like, jinx it…”

“Right,” Willam replied, eyeing the avocado and salmon combination coming travelling towards her. She wasn’t buying Sharon’s vague babbling. “Tell me her name.”

“No!” Sharon exclaimed, as if Willam had just had the audacity to ask Sharon for her dad’s phone number.

Sharon’s cheeks grew hot. She always talked about all things dating with Willam, and she knew she wasn’t coming across well. She was just so taken off-guard. But as Willam hailed a waitress to alert her the approaching wasabi bowl was empty, Sharon realised this was exactly how Alaska felt when Courtney had sprung it on her – and Sharon had made her feel worse. She made a mental note to spend extra time between her thighs tonight to make up for it.

“Why not?” Willam protested. “At least show me a photo. Is she cute? She better be.”

“No, I mean— no to showing you a photo,” Sharon explained. “And yes, she’s cute. She’s beautiful.”

“What does she do?” Willam asked, dunking her sushi into her little bowl of soy sauce as Sharon picked up her previously forgotten chopsticks.

“She’s… a hairdresser,” Sharon improvised, suddenly recalling the alibi Alaska had given her the moment they first met. The flashback to that incredible first night sent a flush of warmth through Sharon, and she couldn’t help but smile at the table at the thought of it.

“Aw,” Willam said through a mouthful of rice. “Look at you, she’s in love.”

Sharon burst out laughing. Willam had worn her down, and talking about Alaska, finally indulging and talking about her greatest pleasure of all, the woman who had captured her heart and was always on her mind, made her giddy.

“Look, you’ll hear all about her when things are more serious and a little more… set in stone,” Sharon promised. “l… really like her. So I really don’t want to fuck things up.”

Willam smiled at her friend as she heard the authenticity in her voice.

“I’m so happy for you Shaz,” Willam said, the both of them not used to sentimental moments like this, “you deserve this.”

S: So

S: Willam knows

A: WHAT!?!?

S: About the relationship, not you personally

A: Thank fuck

A: Oh lol, I see what you did there

A: I’m gonna go to my room and smoke now

S: HEY

A: :))))

S: Happened exactly like you with C, she guessed, said she could tell

A: we’re such fools

S: loved-up fools

The sun beat down on Alaska’s back, warming her skin and drying the salt from the sea into her pores before she heard a voice.

“Be careful not to burn,” Sharon warned, lowering her designer sunglasses to check up on Alaska sunbaking next to her, just out of reach of their umbrella’s circle of shade, which Sharon had made herself comfortable under.

Alaska rolled her neck to the side, smiling at the lengths Sharon went to protect her milky white complexion and prevent early aging. Her blonde hair flowed down from the chic, wide brimmed straw hat she wore, while the dark sunglasses framed her face. An expensive long sleeves white shirt covered her arms, while a plunging black one piece hugged her figure. Her gorgeously long legs were exposed, though the umbrella protected them, as did the layers of sunscreen she had applied earlier. A novel rested in her lap, and a beer was wedged into the sand next to her.

In comparison, Alaska was laying in the sun, her high-cut olive green bikini showing off her curvy bottom, while her back was completely exposed, her bikini top left unhooked under her chest in a bid to get the perfect tan. Her once-wet hair was half drying as she laid, and grains of sand were peppered along her cheekbones.

After Sharon herself had been sprung, she still felt guilty for getting mad at Alaska for a simple mistake. But even though they couldn’t go public, Alaska admitting she wished they could do normal things like go out for brunch or to museums or the movies had played on Sharon’s mind ever since. With some Googling and a price tag that barely made a dent in Sharon’s bank account, she had found them a swish holiday Airbnb that backed onto their own little private beach.

The location was just over an hour away from campus, and the time of the year meant not many people were planning beach getaways. While cooler weather was on the horizon, they had lucked out, with the weekend away they booked being bathed in sunlight and humidity one last time before fall properly set in.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go swimming?” Alaska asked, rolling onto her side and giggling as Sharon lowered her sunglasses again to admire Alaska’s exposed chest.

“I’m sure,” Sharon said succinctly. “I stepped on some random crustacean when I was 15 and split my foot open and have been scared of the water ever since. But you looked very cute frolicking around before.”

“I’ve always wondered about that scar on your foot,” Alaska mused.

“Case closed,” Sharon said, taking a swing of her beer.

Alaska got up, walking over to Sharon and ducking underneath their short umbrella. She sat down on her lap, not caring that her wet hair dropped water onto the other woman, or that her damp body was against her pristine shirt. Sharon discarded her book, choosing to instead wrap her arms around Alaska as their lips met. She sighed as her skin felt the heat radiating off Alaska.

“You’re so warm,” Sharon murmured, kissing her girlfriend, “like my personal little sun.”

Alaska giggled, and being this close meant Sharon noticed the odd little freckle here and there on her face, and how her nose scrunched up when she laughed.

“Okay, I’m the sun,” Alaska said, playing with Sharon’s hair, “and you’re my moon.”

“That’s very cute,” Sharon replied, moving to kiss Alaska’s neck and licking her lips as she tasted salt.

“Please come and swim with me? I promise there are no crustaceans, and the moon actually controls the sea, so you can just shoo them away if they get too close."

“Oh my god,” Sharon grinned, allowing Alaska to haul her up from her beach chair. Their heads almost knocked into the umbrella, but after Sharon shrugged her sun shirt off and Alaska piled her salty hair onto her head and secured it into a messy bun, they walked towards the water together.

Sharon’s alabaster skin glowed in the sunlight, and it was endearing to see her be so cautious as they stepped into the calm water. Once their bodies climatised, they walked in a little deeper, Alaska always a step in front and holding her hand, and Sharon following her sandy little bottom until they became waist deep.

“Are you still scared?” Alaska asked, wrapping her hands around Sharon’s neck and feeling herself pulse as her bare chest pressed against Sharon’s.

Without Alaska initially meaning it and through a weird, telepathic way, they both realised her words carried a meaning beyond just the sea. There would be a million consequences if their relationship got out. Those closest to them would get hurt, and judgment would come from every angle.

But ever since their mutual declaration of love, that ending to their relationship didn’t feel like an ending anymore, but just something that could happen. They would still carry on, hand in hand, together.

“No,” Sharon said, hugging Alaska closer. “As long as I have you, I’m not scared.”c

#extra credit #rosie #shalaska #cisgirl au #au #angst #fluff #sharon needles #alaska thunderfuck #rpdr fanfiction #college au #lesbian au #student/teacher

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alwaysfine · 6 years ago

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𝐈𝐓’𝐒 𝐎𝐅𝐅𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐈 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐘 𝐁𝐄𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐔𝐋 𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋 𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐀𝐊𝐀 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐒 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋𝐒 !

i honestly can’t believe it’s been a year already. it has actually flown by. originally on my multi muse, moving amanda and jesse to their own blogs was the best decision and i’ve been so thankful i did ever since. if i’m being honest, the only reason why i made jesse a sideblog at all was because i was so in love with the url ( badbagelll ) that i couldn’t not. but it turned out better than i could’ve ever anticipated. i’m so grateful for all the wonderful writing partners i’ve been blessed to not only write with, but get to know out of character. all of you are such kind, strong, inspiring, and golden hearted human beings with such creative minds and exceptional talent. i often ask myself what on earth i did, and how i got so lucky to meet you all.

i am so incredibly honored to have the opportunity to bring the independent, strong, unfairly gorgeous, quick witted, badass, and beautifully flawed amanda rollins to life. and not only do i get the pleasure of writing amanda, but our precious bad bagel, jesse.

all in all, amanda @ sonny in that gif is me @ every single person who i write with, who has ever messaged me ooc, and anyone who simply follows this blog. i can honestly say that writing these two characters has been the highlight of my writing journey. i adore each and every one of you, and i look forward to another year. xoxo.

******* under the cut i’m going to be gushing over those of you who still have your blogs and have truly helped to make this past year 𝚎𝚡𝚌𝚎𝚙𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚊𝚕 !

THE ELITE SQUAD.

@amaroed / dany ! writing nick and amanda with you has brought so much absolute joy into my life??? i’ve loved every single one of our threads and memes from them switching the sugar to salt at the precinct kitchenette to amanda becoming nick for halloween to nick trying to keep amanda awake after she caught a bullet to the side. you capture nick so well, and your love for him and danny himself exudes every time you write him. it’s honestly so beautiful to see. after writing with you, i can honestly say that my love for nick amaro increased even more. you are such a talented writer, and i’m forever honored to write with you!

@battleincarnate / maddie ! maddie maddie maddie, my iconic, legendary cher stan. i actually adore you so much i can’t even fully explain. from the first time i talked to you ooc, you just exuded genuine kindness, and were so chill and easy to talk to. i feel like that’s unfortunately super rare, so i just wanna thank you for that??? you’re such a rad friend, and i’m so lucky to have you!! ok as for muses go, i don’t even know where to start?? firstly, your writing is gorgeous and your ability to switch between muses like elliot stabler and ali dilaurentis is remarkable. secondly, what we’ve developed between elliot and amanda is truly one of my favorite relationships i’ve had the pleasure of establishing on this blog, even though we’ve never even gotten to see them together onscreen. i have loved every single thread we’ve ever done. from the first thread we did where they first meet and they literally want to kill each other, to them arguing over who gets to drive on their first day as partners, to all the million and ten things we’ve discussed on discord like their hardcore car karaoke parties and the fact that amanda will ask elliot to walk her down the isle in any verse where she’s married. amanda may be one of the biggest pains in his ass, and elliot may be one of the biggest pains in hers, but they love each other sm it’s so precious. amanda is also so much like elliot it kills me, and the dynamic we’ve created is literal gold. the phrase like father, like daughter has never applied more. he’s the king and she’s the lionheart without a doubt!

@cabotiisms / claire ! like i told you over discord, your portrayal of alex made me love her even more which, i didn’t even think was possible. your grasp on alex’s character, her motives, the way her mind works, is so on point. your love and passion for doing right by alex is so obvious when you write her. now, the big and little sister dynamic we’ve created for alex and amanda makes me smile so much i can’t even explain. i live for alex trying to get amanda out of the messes she gets herself into aka saving her little sister from being ripped to shreds by mom, and in general just being the sister she deserves. the threads we have going right now are quite literally perfect, and i adore them. and out of character? i love yelling at you about how dirty the svu writers did alex, and how dirty they’re currently doing amanda by bringing in cardio douche. but even more importantly, you are one of the most genuinely sweet people i’ve ever met. i adore you, and am so thankful we’re friends!

@drftwood / catie ! i don’t even know where to start. ok firstly, your ability to bring to life so many beautiful oc’s and occasional canon characters absolutely astounds me. you are so creative, all the ideas you come up with are so intriguing, and you have the ability to turn one small detail into an entire beautiful character so effortlessly. it’s so incredible. and this creativity so obviously carries into your writing. your writing is so fucking gorgeous i can’t even believe. every single character that we’ve ever written together has turned into such a beautiful relationship for amanda. chris, alex, and now jr? i mean, jr is such an important person in amanda’s canon now, and i can’t imagine altering her canon storyline in any other way, nor can i imagine anyone else taking on his role except for you. next, i can’t end this without saying how much i love talking to you ooc. like, from the minute we started talking when we started plotting amanda and alex, i knew we were gonna be friends. AND I WAS SO RIGHT. you have such a kind soul and such a big heart, you deserve all the happiness in the world. i am so lucky and proud to be able to call you a friend and ily!!

@etlegis / shep ! ok we literally started talking like 24 hours ago but i already adore you and your peter stone. it’s so obvious that you have his character down in your writing. it’s like i read your starter, and it felt like i was in an episode of svu. not only is your characterization of stone on point, but you are the GREATEST ooc. it was so easy to start talking to you, instafriends some may call it, and we just fell down a rollins/stone hole and i’m not even mad about it. you are such a gem in this community already and i’m so glad you’re here!!

@hellhaths / lara ! lara, i fucking adore you. like for real. i could tell from the second we started talking ooc that we were going to be friends. and i’m proud to say i was very right. you are such an exceptional writer, i can’t properly explain. you put so much into every character you write, and it truly amazes me. now, i think we both know i have to talk about your olivia ‘ squad mom ’ benson because …. wow. from the first introduction to your writing, the first thought i had was ‘ she’s literally olivia benson.’ and that first thread we did with amanda asking olivia about elliot while she was trying to figure out the situation with nick, and not only did it wreck my heart, but it was the beginning of the most legendary olivia / amanda dynamic i could’ve ever asked for. SHE’S LITERALLY HER MOTHER. liv arguing with amanda to stop playing angry birds because it kills her phone battery, confining amanda to desk duty when she does something dumb, taking away amanda’s keys …. the list is literally endless. despite how bratty liv’s dorter gets, we all know she still loves her. listen, you understand the complexities of liv so well, it absolutely astounds me. with twenty seasons of evolution to work with, you incorporate all of it so beautifully. you have her voice and mannerisms down to a tee, and i am so honored to write with you and call you a friend. i’m sending you all the love and light in the world right now, and just know i’m here for you always.

@moontide / angie ! girl, your amanda is so important to my jesse idk if i can even properly put it into words. when i first started writing jesse, i had no idea what type of interactions i would get. truthfully, i thought nobody would show any interest whatsoever and she would just be another blog that faded away. WHAT I NEVER IMAGINED IS WHAT I’VE WRITTEN WITH YOU. the amanda/jesse dynamic we’ve created is so complex and beautiful, and i love it so much. every single heart breaking thread and verse we’ve started or discussed, i love. jesse is so her mama’s daughter, and being able to have those interactions means so much to me, i just have to say thank you. and your amanda? so fantastic. i absolutely love the life you bring to her, and i’m so so so honored to write with you. and remember, even when she’s being a brat, jesse loves her mama more than anything.

@o188 / sunny ! holy shit!!! ok so, i need to start by telling you how big of a part you played in me giving amanda her own blog in the first place. when i found your blog and read your writing, i was, for the lack of a better word, s h o o k. to this day, i am still astounded anytime i read one of your replies, because when you write sonny, you become sonny carisi. from writing his dialogue, to his mannerisms, it’s perfection. and you yourself as a human being???? you’re actually golden and ily. you welcomed me into this community with so much warmth and love and i can never thank you enough!! ok, so now for muses. let me just start with the jesse/sonny dynamic. WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE SOMETHING SO PURE???? sonny carisi is the Best Dad, and jesse loves him endlessly, ok? alright, now for sonny and amanda. listen, i can’t even accurately explain how much my amanda loves your sonny. she would quite literally try and catch a falling star for him if he asked. writing amanda so open and trusting whenever she’s with him is so freakin’ beautiful, okay?? i’ve adored every single thread and meme we’ve ever started with them, from amanda telling him she’s pregnant with g, to the morning after, to post book of esther. their dynamic is so freakin’ important and what we’ve created with them is truly one of my favorite relationships i’ve ever written. oh, and writing them as parents of their precious baby girls?? quite literally makes my heart grow ten sizes. they are so soft, so beautiful, and i am both honored and grateful to have the opportunity to write that with you!!

@painbled / peaches ! cracks knuckles alright here goes!! HI I FREAKING LOVE YOU. you are one of the most genuine human beings i’ve met on here, and i am forever grateful that i chose to write topanga way back when. there was a chunk of time where we fell out of contact, but the second we started talking again, it was like NO TIME AT ALL HAD PASSED. that’s a true testament to our friendship, and i’m forever grateful for that! then, you went and decided to write noah porter benson aka amanda’s lil baby that’s not actually her baby, but she loves him like he is. she would throw down so hard for him, i’m forever emotional about it. the thread we have where liv’s in the hospital has me wrecked, but i also love it because there are so many mama!amanda vibes aimed at noah happening that it makes my heart warmer than the sun. then there’s jess and noah, and good freakin’ lord. THEY’RE SO CUTE I CAN BARELY STAND IT. they are freakin’ in love with each other and icb they’re gonna get married and have a family and liv and amanda are gonna be grandparents to the same kids. listen, both me, amanda, and jesse’s lives wouldn’t be the same without you and your muses in them. you are such a talented writer, and i will forever tell you that whenever you need reminding. thunder, lightning. peaches and honey always!!

@southbronxabogado / adrien ! wow wow wow wow wow. first of all, you are actually rafael barba. i’m convinced. every single thread is so accurate and it brings me so much joy to watch you bring him to life and give him the treatment he deserves. now, the relationship we’ve developed between amanda and rafael is truly one of my favorites. i went from oh yeah they’d be cute, to holy fucking shit they’re perfect in 0.000001 seconds after we first started plotting them. the dynamic they have is so genuine, and the way he treats her just makes my heart so happy. i’ve adored every thread we’ve ever started, from amanda thinking she freakin’ broke the toaster to the throwback thread of him taking her to that fancy benefit. now last but definitely not least, can i just say how wonderful you are ooc? like, i know i can jump into your im’s and start screaming at you enthusiastically in all caps about our idiots without worry. plotting and writing with you has been such a pleasure, and i absolutely adore you. truly. i can’t wait for all the million other things i’m sure we’ll do.

@thingsmissed / jennifer ! ok, so i haven’t really gotten much of a chance to write amanda or jesse with any of your muses, but i absolutely love having you on my dash and talking to you ooc! you put so much effort into all your muses, and it’s absolutely inspiring. you are without a doubt one of the sweetest people with one of the most genuinely kind, caring, and giving hearts that i’ve had the pleasure of meeting on here. you are always so much fun to talk to ooc, and i can always feel your kindness exuding through the screen. you are a very talented writer and i hope you never doubt that!!

#earlier this week marked #one year as amanda and jesse #i can't believe it #guys this is over 2000 words #aka i'm certain i've written more in this post #than i have written ic in the month of october thus far #lol #it's fineeeee #but seriously thank you guys sm for sticking with me wow #xoxoxoxo #( 05. OOC / should probably be doing homework. )

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imnotinclinedtomaturity · 7 years ago

Text

Love Yourself (Chapter 1)

title: Love Yourself summary: A lot of things about Dan’s life are pretty great. He gets to make the music he wants, he’s got a great fanbase, and his manager is his best friend. A few things about his life suck a bit more. He’s currently lacking inspiration, he’s rather lonely, and he’s stuck in a rut. Dan’s been going to the same coffee shop for years. It’s quiet, it’s quaint, it’s near his home. Most importantly: none of the employees give a shit that’s he a world-famous singer. Things change when he meets the new barista. words: 2.3k chapter: 1/? rating: t genre: singer!dan, coffee shop au, barista!phil, slow burn

a/n: shoutout to @auroraphilealis for helping me edit and inspiring me to finally write this fic i’ve had in my head for a year<3 [[ao3]]

“Triple espresso, one sugar. To go.”

“Sure that will be – oh. You’re Dan Howell.”

Dan’s head snapped up to meet the barista’s eyes. His unfamiliar, gorgeous eyes. “And you’re new.”

“Er, yeah. How’d you know that though?”

“I come here almost daily. I live nearby, plus it’s the only place slow enough that I rarely get recognized.” Please don’t be a crazy fan.

“Seems like the kind of thing my coworkers could have warned me about.”

Dan cocked an eyebrow. “Warned? That bad of a surprise, huh?”

The barista’s eyes grew wide. “No! No, that’s not what I meant. I just mean it would have been nice to have a heads up so I wasn’t so surprised. It’s not like I don’t like your music or anything – I actually really enjoyed the new single you released last week and–”

“Relax,” Dan’s eyes flickered down to the cute new worker’s name tag, “Phil, I’m just kidding.”

“Oh. Good. Um…” Phil seemed to remember he was at work and had a job to do. “That will be three pound fifty.”

Dan dug his wallet out of his pocket and embarrassedly remembered he was wearing old joggers and a hoodie. What a great outfit to meet a cute guy in.

Dan shuffled down the counter, trailing Phil as he started making his coffee. The sudden appearance of a new (attractive) employee woke him up better than any triple espresso ever could.

“So, Phil, what brings you to this hole-in-the-wall coffee shop?”

Phil’s head shot up, as if he was surprised that Dan was continuing to talk with him. “Oh, you know, the usual. I just moved to London and needed a job to help pay the rent.”

“Welcome to London. Where did you move from?”

“Thanks! I just got here from Manchester last week.” Phil slid Dan’s coffee across the counter, a few drops splashing over the edge. However, instead of Dan grabbing his coffee and leaving, he leaned forward, rested his arms on the counter, and took a long sip of his coffee. He knew he should be going — he had a plenty long to do list today — but he couldn’t resist learning a bit more about Phil.

It’s just because he’s new and I come here every day. It’d be weird not to chat.

Even as he thought it, he knew it wasn’t true. All he knew about the girl who was normally working during the weekday mornings — Emma? Emily? — was that she was Irish, and that was based solely off her accent. The guy who worked on the weekends — Jake, maybe? — was incapable of putting his phone down for more than thirty seconds and smoked like a chimney.

But Phil’s new. It’d be rude not to be friendly.

“How are you liking London so far?”

“It seems like a cool city, from what I’ve seen of it. Between unpacking and working, I haven’t really had a lot of time to explore yet.”

“There’s definitely plenty to explore. What kind of stuff are you into?”

“Um, I’m a bit of a nerd, to be honest.”

Dan chuckled and wondered just how much ‘a bit’ was. If Phil was anything like him, ‘a bit’ was code for ‘completely and utterly’. “I feel you there. Have you been to the Sherlock museum?”

Phil’s eyes lit up. “No! I want to so badly though. I’ve heard it’s amazing.”

“It totally is. I swear I think I had to be dragged away the first time I went. They were literally closing when I finally left.”

Phil leaned forward, resting his arms on the counter. “I’ll definitely have to check it out. My friend promised to go on the Doctor Who tour with me on my next day off, so it will have to be after that though.”

“I’ve been meaning to go on that! No one in my life likes it enough to go on a two and a half hour tour with me, though, and I hate doing stuff like that alone.”

Phil nodded along like he perfectly understood what Dan was complaining about. “I know what you mean, there were so many nerdy things I wanted to do when I was living in Manchester but none of my friends there were interested in going with me.”

“That sucks. It’s good that you’ve got someone here who’ll go with you.” Dan took a sip of his coffee, taking the opportunity to study Phil’s features a bit more closely over the brim of his cup. His eyes were a striking combination of blue, green, and yellow and his jet black hair was carefully arranged in a short, borderline-outdated, emo fringe that Dan would have done anything to replicate just last year. One the whole, Cute Coffee Boy looked much more put together than Dan did. To be fair, he probably didn’t roll out of bed twenty minutes ago. “Okay, so, important question. Who’s your favorite Doctor?”

Phil looked contemplative for a moment. “Well, obviously David Tennant was great. He was both cute and played a great character. But I also kind of have a soft spot for Christopher Eccleston? He was the first person I ever saw playing the Doctor and who got me into the show, so he’ll always have a place in my heart.”

“I feel that way about David Tennant! I didn’t give in and start watching until he started — obviously I went back and caught up after watching like two episodes. Are you all caught up? I’ve been dying to talk about —”

Dan was interrupted by his phone buzzing.

Both he and Phil glanced down at his phone, which laying face up on the counter. “Louise <3” was on the caller ID. Dan shot Phil an apologetic smile and held up a finger as he answered, trying to express his annoyance at being interrupted.

“Hi Lou.”

“Daniel James Howell, I’ve been in your apartment for 20 minutes where are you?” Dan’s face fell in shame.

Oh shit. Louise. THAT’S what I was supposed to be doing.

“Er, I’m downstairs. At the coffee shop.”

“Of course you are. Get your butt up here. And bring me a coffee since I had to wait on your bum.”

“Sorry, sorry, I’ll be there in 10.” Dan turned to Phil. “Looks like I need a venti iced soy latte with two and a half pumps of vanilla, double whip cream, and cocoa powder on top.”

Phil raised his eyebrow. “Complicated drink.”

“Complicated drink, complicated girl. I’ll take a few shots of baileys in my coffee if you’ve got any back there. I have a feeling I’m about to get yelled at for being late.”

“Ha. Ha. So you’ve got to go meet your… girlfriend?”

Dan blushed. “NO! God no! I mean – that came out harsh. Louise and I would be a train wreck. She’s my best friend. And my manager.”

Dan averted his eyes, staring into his coffee rather than at Cute Coffee Boy. The silence that fell in the coffee shop while Phil made Louise’s drink felt awkward to Dan and he really, really hoped Phil didn’t feel it too.

Unable to come up with anything to say, now that their conversation had been interrupted by Louise, Dan fiddled on his phone, liking a few tweets here and there. Both too soon and not soon enough, Phil passed him Louise’s and suddenly he had no legitimate reason for loitering. Phil handed him his receipt with a chipper “have a nice day!” and Dan awkwardly dropped his change in the tip char.

Despite having his slowly cooling coffee and Louise’s slowly melting drink, Dan was tempted to stay, to keep talking to this interesting and adorable new barista, but he knew that he couldn’t. He knew Louise would be furious if he wasn’t back in his apartment in the next five minutes, and even more so, he knew talking to a cute boy wasn’t something he was allowed to do at this moment in time.

So rather than staying and talking and just melting in the presence of this beautiful human, Dan grabbed Louise’s fancy ass drink and his own dark and bitter espresso and turned to leave. But before he could even turn around, the words just fell out of his mouth.

“I’ll see you again soon? Raincheck on that Doctor Whol conversation?”

Phil smiled and raised one hand in a stilted wave of sorts. “I’ll be here!”

Dan couldn’t tell if Phil’s response was customer service friendly, or trying to keep my fanboy in check friendly, or I actually want to see you again friendly.

Unfortunately, it seemed, Dan cared.

Dan trudged back into his lobby, nodding hello at the doorman, Mark. Trying not to dump out his drinks, he stuck his key into the elevator and pressed 7, nearly spilling his drinks anyway when the elevator started opening.

When the elevator doors opened to his apartment, Dan was immediately bombarded by Louise, who was apparently waiting in the entryway.

“Dan! I know I told you we were meeting to go over some of this publicity stuff today, where did you go?”

In response, Dan shoved her too sweet coffee into her hands, kicked his worn converse off, and walked passed her into the living room.

Louise followed him into the room, sitting in the armchair across from him. “You’re being weird, what happened?”

Dan sighed, figuring there was no use keeping anything from Louise.

“Well, you know Beans and Grind?”

Louise held up her cup, which clearly had the coffee shop’s name stamped on it. “No, no dear, never heard of it.”

“Shut up, Lou.” He took a sip of his drink, slightly stalling in hopes that Louise would bring up whatever business matters she wanted to cover.

She didn’t. She patiently drank her coffee and stared at Dan over the brim of her cup, waiting for him to continue.

“Ugh, fine Louise. There’s this new barista.”

To her credit, Louise was first and foremost always an amazing friend; she never told Dan off too severely for being reckless or stupid or making poor decisions. So rather than pointing out the millions of reasons why this discussion could lead somewhere bad, she leaned in conspiratorially.

“Tell me everything. Girl? Boy? Non-binary? I want all of the details.”

“His names Phil.” Dan paused, waiting for Louise to say something. What, he wasn’t sure, but he was positive she’d have something to say on the matter. When twenty seconds went by and Louise was still silently staring at him, waiting for more, Dan finally continued.

“He’s new, he just moved to London, he was surprisingly not fan-like once he got passed the initial ‘there’s a famous singer in my coffee shop’, and is apparently a massive nerd. I didn’t get the chance to learn too much else about him though, because somebody called demanding my presence.”

“Well, if I’d known you were making the acquaintance of a cute, new boy, maybe I wouldn’t have.”

“It was just friendly, Louise.” But even as the words came out of his mouth, Dan knew he didn’t believe them.

Fuck.

Morning coffee and gossip with Louise eventually turned into productive work time with Louise, which after a few hours turned into wine and more gossip with Louise. It was nearing 9 o’clock when the elevator let out a loud ding, indicating that someone had entered the apartment. Given Dan’s allowed visitors list, it could really only be one person.

High heels click clacked on the hardwood floor but the footsteps passed the lounge and continued further down the hallway.

“Really, Dan, this is still happening?” Dan threw a slightly startled, slightly admonishing look in Louise’s direction.

A shrill voice called loudly from the kitchen. “Ugh, Danny! I had such a bad day at work and of course you didn’t come take me out for lunch like I texted you to. Did you have your phone on, like, do not disturb or something?”

Rather than responding to the accusation, Dan turned and whispered to Louise. “Quiet or she’ll hear. Be nice, I really don’t want to fight tonight.”

The voice from the kitchen continued whining. “The girl at work was being, like, so annoying. She doesn’t understand that it’s, like, literally her job to do my errands and stuff. I mean, like—”

Louise continued talking, slightly drowning out the high-pitched complaining from the other room. “Right, unlike every single other night you’ve seen each other this month.”

“— and, like, the woman doing my nails didn’t even believe that I knew you. As if she hadn’t seen us together in the media or anything. I actually had to, like, show her my lockscreen to make her believe. When she finally got the fucking picture, she was much nicer and gave me a free—”

Dan and Louise had both mostly tuned out the diatribe against the woman from work, the manicurist, and whoever else was being complained about.

“Louise.” Dan sent her a pleading look, silently begging her to be nice, don’t provoke her, don’t lecture me.

“Fine, I’ll be polite. That still doesn’t mean I approve of you continuing this…whatever thisis.” Louise loosely gestured to the hallway toward the voice in the other room, which was still rambling at an ear-splitting pitch.

Somewhat resigned, Dan shrugged his shoulders. “Good enough.”

Just as the words left Dan’s mouth, the visitor waltzed into the living room, preceded only slightly by the tell-tale click clack of stilettos. She was wearing a tight red dress with a plunging neckline and her nails were painted to match perfectly. Her hair was styled in big, loose curls that Dan was sure probably took some hair stylist ages to achieve — and probably left a hefty charge on his account, too. The woman was sipping a bottle of Perrier she’d already taken from Dan’s fridge, leaving a thick stain of dark red lipstick around the mouth of the bottle. A bit belatedly, Dan jumped off the couch and crossed the room to give her a chaste kiss on the cheek and wrap his arm loosely around her waist.

“Hi, Isabella, I didn’t realize we had plans tonight.”

[[next chapter]]

#slow burn #barista!phil #singer!dan #phan #phanfiction #phanfic #au #phan au #iminclinedtowriting #reposted from iminclinedtowriting #rip my decision to split up my blogs

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