#i mean ryder Should

[crqstalite]

ah shit this entire chapter is just dialogue lmaooo

[saintedbythestorm]

You know, it didn't hit me yesterday... but the fact the psychologist refused to write my pronouns in the medical journal because "it would be unprofessional" and she'd be "doing so before the diagnosis" (sort of meaning like she'd be giving me the diagnosis if she did this) is kinda fucked up actually.

And I don't think I'll be seeing her again even if I needed to talk about other issues like she talked about. I'm kinda done with her honestly.

[chevvy-yates]

Played the Myers rescue mission last night with Thyjs. I played it before with Arki but now that I am through it with Thyjs, his game play felt like I played a few rounds of Battlefield V, srsly.

But comparing it with Arki, Thyjs constantly needs to be active and run around with Sandevistan as staying in one spot was almost lethal for him last night. Never had such a tricky situation (shortly before So Mi hacks the Militech Chimera) were you are attacked from all sides by heavy equipped Barghest guys.

To my bad luck I forgot to update Thyjs c-ware/armor at a ripperdoc and he sadly still has too low-level shotguns so it was super tricky to keep alive.

But the fight against the Chimera was faster than with Arki as Thyjs is running faster and therefore can better avoid incoming missiles from the Chimera. he also has his electric gernade launcher that already did some good damage to it.

It's nice when your ideas and thoughts actually play exactly like you imagined. Thyjs is not a tank unlike Arki so he has to be fast to avoid damage while Arki can take some hits.

But I def need to level up his armor cyberware, bc it's too weak atm (only one slot yet and just subdermal armor). Sandevistan needs it's upgrade too, everything needs an upgrade. ugh.

And I need to find his iconic shotgun "The Headsman" ingame as the spawned one I still had from pre 2.0 is so low-level I cannot use it anymore.

[whereisthedamndaddymanual]

I know you like to watch me +/(redacted)

At least you openly admitted to something.

[tarysande]

There are a couple more Garrus-Vakarian-related hills I'm willing to die on.

Maybe this particular bit of fanon has faded over the years, but there used to be a lot of insistence that Garrus is young and somehow inexperienced when he meets Shepard. Canon doesn't really support this. Turians start their mandatory service at 15. Garrus has at least a decade of experience. Even if he's 2-4 of years younger than Shepard (according to Patrick Weekes), he's got at least as much field experience as she does by dint of the difference in turian and human "enlistment" ages.

Garrus is really damn good at his job at C-Sec. You don't give the Case of Investigating the Rogue Spectre to a greenhorn. You give it to your best, most tenacious agent. Pallin may not always approve of Garrus's actions, but that doesn't actually stop him from putting Garrus on the tough case. Also, we don't know much about how C-Sec works but we do know a bit about how the turian hierarchy works, and we know C-Sec was essentially a turian initiative. That means it's a meritocracy where failure reflects on the superior, not the one who failed. So, in roughly a decade (Shepard's 29 in ME1; I always think of Garrus as about 27), Garrus has not only done shipboard military service, but he's also risen to be one of C-Sec's top investigators; Pallin wouldn't risk having Garrus's "failure" reflect poorly on HIM otherwise. I'd say that actually makes Garrus as remarkable in civilian law enforcement terms as Shepard is considered to be within the ranks of the Alliance military.

Of course Garrus was scouted by the Spectre program. And honestly, if his dad hadn't stepped in, I think Garrus would have become a Spectre, no problem. Especially for a turian, he's cut from precisely the cloth the Spectres would be looking for: extremely skilled, extremely capable, and--most importantly--he's a turian not just able but willing to work outside the chains of command that turians are taught from birth to revere and be loyal to above all else. This is the reason Pallin is leery about Spectres: he's a good turian. Good turians follow straight lines; they don't carve out their own paths.

Garrus's dad's not dumb, and he's not cruel, and he, too, rose to the top of the C-Sec hierarchy. He took one look at his kid, I think, and said, "I love my child, but I'd say it's a 50-50 chance he ends up a shooting-first-asking-questions-later Spectre like Saren Arterius, and I don't want to see that happen." Yeah, he uses his parental influence to try and jam square-peg-Garrus into round-hole-C-Sec and Garrus resents him for it, but there's no way he did it just to stop his son from getting his way or because he doesn't like Spectres. I expect Vakarian Sr. had to clean up more post-Spectre-interference messes than we can possibly imagine. But we also know he and Alec Ryder were pals later.

So the importance of what Garrus learns from a Paragon Spectre Shepard is this: You can't just do what you want and claim the ends always justify the means. That's what Saren does. Over and over again. Garrus's code and his idealism and his sense of justice and his ability to work alone should make him a great Spectre, actually, but he needs Paragon Spectre Shepard's actions to show him the lesson he tells her he's learned during ME1: "If the people I'm sworn to protect can't trust me... well, then I don't deserve to be the one protecting them." (And the seed of Archangel was planted.) I think for the first time he realizes that even though he believes his sense of justice to be correct, it doesn't matter for shit if he can't show others why that's so. And that's where the trust comes in. (Also, ow, the extra level of importance this gives their exchange where she tells him she trusts him and he tells her she's about the only friend he has left is... a lot. Cool, cool. I'm totally fine. Nothing to see here.)

When Shepard asks him what happened on Omega, he replies, "My feelings got in the way of my better judgement." Something tells me that this never happens to "good" turians, which just makes the line so much more devastating. And although the lesson some might take away from this is "feelings bad; no feelings ever," the "grey" that Garrus has to learn to deal with is precisely the grey of recognizing feelings, validating them even, but not acting on them until they've been examined. (Which is why my Shepard stands between him and Sidonis; she doesn't give a shit about Sidonis. But Garrus has refused to process his own feelings of failure and self-loathing, so they have to take the therapy session to the Citadel and deal with it there.)

Ahh yes. The mountain range of character analysis.

[mirandasidefics]

hi!!

can i request poly!bat boys x plus sized reader?

if you're comfortable writing about children, could you write a lil one shot about them just taking care of their children throughout a busy and chaotic day and then the 4 of them head to bed for the night and reminisce on their days before children?

(like they love their children to death and wouldn't trade them for the world, but they still acknowledge that their kids are WORK [but judging by the parents, they're not surprised 😭] and not for the weak)

Adventures in Parenting (miniseries)

1. Chaos and All

Pairing(s): Poly! Bat Boys x Plus Size! Reader

Word Count: 1.9K

Warning(s): None really. This is mostly fluff and parenting chaos.

Author’s Note: The more I wrote this one-shot, the more I want to turn this into a small little series. So, if anyone else has requests for this family set up send them in! I didn’t do the multiple mates with this Polyship, I hope that’s okay. I also used my youngest nephew as inspiration for the twins. He is a ball of chaos and I fully believe he is the mortal embodiment of Loki. I love him. Some of these events also may or may not be based on actual incidents that happened within my own household. Don’t worry, no one was injured, and consequences were appropriately implemented. Raising children is not for the weak!  

ACOTAR Masterlist Divider by @tsunami-of-tears

“JUST WAIT UNTIL YOUR FATHER GETS HOME!” The echo of your roar reverberated along the stone halls of the House of Wind. It was quickly followed by two distinct sets of giggles. Cassian and Azriel, having returned early from Wind Haven, overheard the slew of curses flowing from your lips.

Soon, two boys rounded the corner and immediately squealed in excitement upon seeing Cassian. The large Illyrian bent down to his knees as the pair of 6-year-olds raced towards him. Effortlessly, he picked them both up, blowing a raspberry against each of their cheeks. The children were absolutely delighted. That was until you came around the corner following them. Your expression was far from amusing. With a hand on your rounded belly, you came to a stop before the males and your shared children.

“Warren, are you tormenting your poor mama?” Cassian asked.

“No Papa.” 

“Yes.” 

The twins spoke simultaneously. Azriel had to suppress his laugh. Your eyes burned with ire.

“Mama’s being mean!” Warren stated, pointing his little index finger at you. You raised your eyebrow at his boldness.

“Oh, I’m being mean now?” You crossed your arms, your son merely copying your stance. “Do you want to tell Dada and Papa what you did? Or should I?” The two children remained silent.

“Alright then, you had your chance,” You huffed. “Mama is being mean because she had to put out the fire you set in the bathroom!” The two boys shrank within Cassian’s arms.

“They did what now?” Azriel’s expression hardened.

“You heard right. They thought it was okay to play with the candle I had burning in the bathroom,” You explained, making your way over to the Shandowsinger, “A candle that was only lit because Ryder complained about Warren stinking up the toilet!” The twins giggled to themselves. You recognized the mirthful gleam in Cassian's eyes as he tried to maintain a serious expression. It was clear that you were at your wits end. And the stress wasn’t good for the baby in your belly, which was due within the month. Azriel moved to stand behind you, and once in place he wrapped his arms around you and underneath your belly. With the slightest of movements, he supported the weight for you. He could feel the relief wash over you. From over your shoulder, he leveled a stern glare at the boys.

“Well Mama,” Cassian started, “What’s on your mind for a fitting consequence?”

“For these two I honestly don’t know any more,” You tried to keep the hormone fueled frustration tears at bay. “A week with no dessert seems too light, but a literal grounding- a week of no flying-seems cruel. I leave it to you males. They don’t listen to me anyway.”

“I’ll be the first to agree,” Azriel’s words were careful. “They need to understand how dangerous playing with fire can be. One of you could have been seriously hurt.” You placed your hands over Azriel’s in comfort.

“I think the first thing that needs to be done is an apology,” Cassian finally set the twins back down. “Boys, apologize to your Mother.” His tone was stern and unyielding. The voice of a General. That tone always stirred something in you. Azriel’s nose brushed along the side of your neck, and you felt his lips curve up in a smile. Damn your hormones.

“Sorry Mama,” their tiny voices murmured in unison. Cassian shooed them away and back to the playroom. He quickly kissed your lips before following them. You were at a disadvantage when it came to the wild energy of your twins. Rhysand and Azriel could only chuckle to themselves half the time, filling you in on stories of Cassian’s own behaviors growing up. Unfortunately, the two boys had begun to act out ever since your eldest son went to train with the Darkbringers. You didn’t want him to be exposed to the cruelty of Hewn City, but Rhysand insisted upon some type of military training. And since he was your only child born without wings the elite unit of the Court of Nightmares was his best option.

“We’ll take care of the kids,” Azriel whispered against your neck. “Why don’t you get some rest?” You nodded, rubbing along his hands still holding up your belly. He carefully let go, and you groaned at having to support the weight on your own again.

He followed you to your bedroom and helped you settle into what surely had to be the largest bed in existence. After tucking you in underneath one of the deep mahogany throw blankets, he quietly left the room. You could faintly hear your children’s laughter as they played with their father, the joyful noise allowing you to drift off into a peaceful nap.

Hours later you had awoken to the sound of the bedroom door opening. You reached to turn on the faelight near the bed and turned to face the entrance to the room. Rhysand stood near the door, looking sheepish at having woken you. You smiled at seeing your third lover.

“How did doling out the punishment go?” Slowly you turned from your left side onto your back. Rhysand continued to make his way across the room, removing his shirt as he approached the bed.

“No dessert for the week, per Mama’s orders,” He supplied. “And all their toys are being gathered up by Cass and Az as we speak. Well, they get to keep their favorite stuffed toy for sleeping.”

“All of the toys!” You sat up straight. “Rhys are you trying to drive me insane? What are they going to do all day?” The door to the bedroom squeaked on its hinges, the light from the hall revealing Cassian.

“They’ll be in Wind Haven,” Cassian stated as he strode into the bedroom. “With me.”

“They’re too young to start training!” You shouted, which seemed to displease the babe inside you as it kicked against what you could only assume was your kidney. Your hand went directly to the spot and your eyes fluttered closed at the discomfort. Rhysand moved to sit behind you.

“They will not be training,” Rhysand reassured, setting a leg on either side of you before encouraging you to lean back against his chest.

“They will be helping the wounded males with some of their daily tasks,” Cassian finished. “At least tasks that they are capable of doing.” You worried at your bottom lip. It would be a valuable experience for them to have those interactions. However, most of the wounded received said injuries during a fight of some kind. You hoped the twins wouldn’t get the wrong ideas and start to romanticize war and violence. Mother above that was the last thing you needed!

“If it makes you feel better, they will be assisting the shopkeepers and not the battle heroes' ' Rhys said, kneading the muscle around your right hip.

“Additionally, for each task they help with they earn a toy back,” Cassian added. He lounged across the foot of the bed.

“That all sounds more than fair,” You took a sharp inhale as Rhysand’s knuckle rubbed against a particularly painful spot. The pressure against the knot hurt, but also relieved the growing ache. Your muscles had become so tight from carrying the extra weight of your unborn child. You turned your head back to face him and kissed his cheek.

This little one in your womb would place you with five children. Five. You had agreed to a total of three pregnancies. One for each of the males you loved so fiercely. But Cassian just had to sire twins. And then Rhysand insisted on performing the Great Right at the most recent Calanmai. Making this fourth pregnancy completely unexpected. Especially since you also laid with Cassian and Azriel that night. You also had no clue which of the three males was the biological father. But that didn’t really matter in the long run. While each male had their biological offspring, they raised all the children as if they were their own blood. A sudden realization hit you like the cold winter winds in Illyria.

“What about after?” You asked. “I love my children, but we are outnumbered.”

“What if Al-” Rhysand started.

“No, don't send for Aldrin, he’s 15 and just now settling into figuring out what type of person he wants to become. I won’t place the weight of being a caregiver on him. I need one of you here, especially when the baby is born.”

“I will stay,” Azriel offered entering the space as well. He was carrying your current youngest, Aria, in his arms.

“Did she have another nightmare?” You reached your arms out to her, but Azriel didn’t lower her down to you. Instead, he sat in the rocking chair with Aria still in his arms. Her wings were tucked in tight against her back. Her head rested against Azriel’s shoulder; her large green eyes open yet still looking between each of her parents. She was always so quiet.

“No, she saw me and just wanted to be held for a while,” He pushed the rocking chair back and forth using the balls of his bare feet.

“Like father like daughter,” You chuckled. The room settled into a comfortable silence. Cassian at your feet, rubbing them and your swollen ankles. Rhysand at your back, continue his own massage of your lower back. You were in your own personal heaven as you watched Aria from the spot on the bed. Watched as her eyelids drooped before fully closing. Slowly Azriel stood from his seat and carried the 2-year-old to bed. When he returned, Cassian was now sprawled on your right side, Rhysand still sitting behind you.

“It feels like it's been years since we’ve all had a quiet moment like this,” You broke the silence, closing your eyes and leaning onto the male behind you.

“True, so why did you go and ruin it,” Cassian said in jest. However, he quickly yowled in pain from Azriel hitting his arm.

“We certainly have a rowdy bunch of younglings to contend with,” Rhysand hummed, his fingers tracing up and down your arms.

“As I said before,” Azriel began his own nightly routine of readying for bed, “I will stay with you when the baby arrives.”

“What about-”

“If there is need of a spy, we have others that can complete whatever mission I need,” Rhysand advised. “He will be here to assist when either Cassian or I am busy.” You were so grateful for these males.

“And on the bright side, soon they won’t be as…energetic,” Cassian’s devilish smile spread across his face, “And we can go back to more grown-up activities.” You couldn’t hold back the laugh. The other two males just rolled their eyes.

"Need I remind you three, that our grown-up activities are exactly what created those lovely little terrors we call our children,” You gave Cassian a pointed stare.

“While that wasn’t what I was referring to I’m certain we can always accommodate our female’s more carnal desires,” He tried to defend himself. You scoffed, doing your best to hide the flush that bloomed across your cheeks.

“I agree with Cassian,” Rhys started. “While I miss the days before children, those days will return faster than we can fathom. And I am completely content in being present for what we have now. Chaos and all.”  

General Tag list: @loving-and-dreaming

[beauty-and-passion]

Eurovision 2023: the show of unfairness and the triumph of people’s hearts

My god, this year left me exhausted.

It’s 1:30 am, the Eurovision Grand Final just ended and I am starting to write this post now, because I need some time to calm myself before going to bed. And maybe putting down some thoughts about this year will help me find some peace - at least for a couple hours.

This year has not been what was supposed to be, starting from the show and ending with the winner.

But let’s start from the beginning.

______________________________

Ukraine: robbed of their own show

We all know Ukraine couldn’t host Eurovision in their country because of the war, so they asked the UK to do that.

And the UK tried to be a good host. They reminded us of the reason why Ukraine couldn’t do it, they tried to call Ukrainian artists and make the show about them... only to systematically forget it two minutes later and start acting as if they won and this was their show.

I hope now you understand why last year I said to not give them power over anything. The UK has a tiny little problem called “massive ego” and if you give them a little crumb, they will immediately scarf the whole cake down.

This year should’ve been 70% Ukraine themed and 30% UK themed. What we had instead was the other way around: the UK gave us a tiny little interval show in the semifinals about Ukraine, then a massive show all about the UK.

The Gran Final has been the icing on this disgusting cake. It started with a bang, featuring all of our favourite Ukrainian artists in the span of five minutes: Tina Karol (I had no idea she was Ukrainian, what a nice surprise!), goddess Verka, my beloved Go_A with The Only Queen That Matters, aka Kateryna Pavlenko. And, of course, our favourite winners: the Kalush Orchestra. Man Carpet is still an icon and I still wonder what the singer sees behind that pink hat, but I don’t care. It’s perfect, it’s great, I want this but 200x more. I want them to steal the show, I want them in all interval acts. But no worries, I’m sure they will definitely appear more during the final. I mean, there’s no way the UK called them just to appear for 20 seconds, right? Right?

Oh sorry, my bad. I forgot this isn’t Ukraine’s show, this is UK’s show. We should definitely have Sam Ryder in the interval act and we should definitely make it all about English songs. I mean, it’s not like there are four of the most beloved Ukrainian artists in Liverpool. Let’s make it all a huge masturbation session of the UK instead.

I apologize if my metaphor offended someone, but this is what I felt while watching the UK celebrating itself. Like... can’t you do this in a private room? Do I really have to watch it? This is just one step below Portugal’s show, which showed a massive ego as well and tortured me for three nights straight, by repeating how cool they were and how nice they were and how I would’ve done a great choice visiting them.

But even if that was torture, at least Portugal was the winner of the previous year, not a host masturbating over the fact they are allowed to host a show they didn’t win.

The only choice I fully approve of in this show is the postcards idea: that was very elegant and respectful and I want to thank the person who thought about it. The cards show Ukraine’s beautiful places, UK’s beautiful places and every country’s beautiful places. It’s all beautiful and it’s a great way to both honor Ukraine and emphasize UK’s hosting role, since it looks almost like the UK acts as a “connection” between Ukraine and every other country.

Unfortunately for us, this is the last proof of elegance we will see for the rest of the show.

______________________________

Danemark and Poland: robbed even before starting

Do you remember Danemark’s and Poland’s entries? I know, me neither. Bland, forgetful, two huge balls of nothing.

Well, I have a good news and a bad one. The good one is that Danish and Polish people are not insane and their musical tastes are actually way better than this. The bad news is that the two entries we got (Bejba and Tiktokkid) were not supposed to win their country’s competition, because the public’s favourites were different. But, like, VERY different.

Same thing happened last year for Spain, but at least Chanel was able to put on a great show - even if her song was boring. Danemark and Poland didn’t have that either: one gave us a meme, the other gave us nothing. Disappointing.

So let’s clean Danemark’s and Poland’s names, by listening to the artists they were actually supposed to bring. Let’s start with Danemark and please, tell me if the tiktok kid is better than this (if you dare):

And before you think: “oh my gosh, this could’ve been a great entry for Danemark!”, please listen to what Poland was supposed to bring:

I love this song. I love this cute nice boy. I love the classical vibes. And when I played this song for my father, my 70-year-old father told me, with no hesitation: “Oh, this is way better than the other one!”.

So if a 70-year-old can recognize how good this song is, then there’s no generational gap and it’s not true that people are accustomed to the same boring stuff. If a song is good, is good. If a song is bland, is bland.

By now you probably already heard from Polish people about how the voting system of their competition was rigged and how Blanka won thanks to the power of nepotism. So our duty as Europeans (and as people with some fucking taste) is to stream Gladiator, listen to all of his songs and shower this boy with love because he needs to know the world loves him.

And for you all, Polish people: thank you for making us know about your true winner. He really looks like one and we love him too.

______________________________

Germany: robbed while trying

I really cannot understand why people keep hating Germany this much. Is it still because of WW2? What did they do, to deserve the bottom of the chart? I know it’s funny, I know it’s for the memes ah ah ah, but also... come on. Come. On. Are you really telling me that Poland was better than Germany? Are you really telling me that the UK was better than Germany?

I can assure you that if Sweden brought this exact same song, the jury would’ve given this song 300 points. But hey, ThE jUrY iS iMpArTiAl, right?

German people: I don’t know why the world hates you. I think you would’ve gotten more votes, if only the system wasn’t so stupidly rigged and forced everyone to choose one winner only, hoping to defeat the jury’s sheer power. Personally, I enjoyed your song and I enjoyed Lord of the Lost and I will definitely listen to more of their songs to add to my playlist.

However, I also understand your frustration. So you know what? Just go nuts. Choose whoever the fuck you want to represent your country, attend Eurovision whenever you want and do whatever you want, give us insane shit and amazing stuff. You will be treated the same either way, so why give a fuck? Have fun showing your insane side, I will support you 100%.

______________________________

Italy and Israel: what did they ever do to deserve these places?

As an Italian, I am honored people gave so many votes to Italy. Seriously, thank you all, nice to know people appreciate our singers.

But also: why so many votes? Why? I know Mengoni is a good singer, he has a great voice and if this was a real singing competition he would’ve probably deserved to win.

But since Eurovision is not a singing competition, why all these points? Were people really so in love with this ballad? Why? What does he have I cannot understand?

Even more important: why Israel, with their stupid unicorn song, got all these votes? Why? Is it because she’s good-looking? Seriously? Are we still stuck thinking with our genitals, instead of using our brains? I thought Europe moved past the need of thinking with genitals only and started developing some good fucking taste.

Or did her amazing “dance moves” get the public? Ok, she’s very flexible... but do I really really have to remind you of Chanel? A small dance segment is really worth so many points, when last year we had someone who was able to sing AND dance as she did for the entire song? I didn’t even like Chanel, but I am mature enough to recognize that THAT was a show, while the unicorn lady did nothing more than a small dance. Definitely not worth 185 public votes.

At least I know that my country didn’t go insane and the true points (aka the public’s points) didn’t go to the unicorn but to Moldova. Thank god, we are still able to recognize what’s good.

______________________________

Finland: the real winner

When Eurovision started, I was sure Czechia would’ve been the winner. However, their performance wasn’t enough to grant them victory.

Finland, however, had everything a winner needs. And now I will explain to you why, because I love this funky green man and you should love him too.

1) “A little man from Vantaa”

Käärijä is a rare gem, not just for Eurovision, but in general. He’s a simple, genuine, silly guy, who comes from a city few people knew before. He doesn’t speak English too well, but he tries and fails in comically sweet ways. He’s a huge fan of Rammstein, so he’s a man of culture. He became besties with Bojan from the Slovenian band Joker Out and their bromance has been the best part of this Eurovision: these two share one single braincell and I love them for this.

But, most of all, he’s humble. He never considered himself above all others, even after his victory. He knew right from the start that it would’ve been a battle between him and Loreen and yet, he never grew arrogant about it. He always talked about their rivalry in funny ways, through memes and by treating her nicely. But he also never underestimated her: he always put his whole self into every performance, knowing full well he had to give everything, to reach the public’s hearts.

And he did. He reached the public’s hearts and like many others all over the world, I also love this little man. He’s genuine, he’s honest, he’s a fashion icon (Finland changes their flag to green when), his dancers are funky and nice like him. You look at him once and all you can think is: “I want to protect him at all costs”. It’s just impossible to hate this man.

2) His song is a banger

Not only his song is a fusion of three genres (industrial metal, hyperpop and hip-hop/rap), so he’s already serving you three songs in one, but the language he used is Finnish.

I’ve heard Finnish people saying that they never used their language because it’s “too weird”. People, that’s exactly because it’s weird that you should use it! You have this gem and you hide it to us?!

If you don’t know why Finnish is so great, please consider that while all other European languages are part of the Indo-European family, Finnish, Estonian and Hungarian are not. They are part of a completely different family (the Uralic languages).

That means they have nothing similar to any other European language. They are something completely different and new, a whole new world to explore. And they’re here, in our continent!

In addition to that, Finnish is an agglutinative language, which means words are formed by stringing together morphemes. How fucking cool is that? I love this kind of language!

As someone who studied English, French, German and Russian, Finnish is something that gets my attention. I can recognize similarities between Germanic, Slavic and Italic languages and I love them, but Finnish is an unexplored world. It’s made of sounds that well, sound familiar even if they’re not. It’s a constant surprise, you know?

Also, I love that it’s a language full of vowels because it makes me think of my own mother tongue (Italian). It’s a bit like feeling at home, even if our languages have nothing in common <3

3) The best performance of Eurovision 2023

I love the Croatian daddies like the next person (and I’m glad the public gave them the top 10 because they deserve it), but Käärijä’s performance had everything: it told us a story (i.e. how Käärijä slowly emerges from behind his barriers to join the party), he gave us the best stupid dance moves and there’s even a family-friendly human centipede. What else do you need, to start dancing?

Also, another shoutout to his dancers, because I live for those shocking pink dresses and for their immensely creepy expressions. And I live for the public always welcoming them with screams: they deserve it.

I know you already enjoyed it 200 times, but you know what? Let’s fucking destroy the views of this video and let’s watch it again. And also, let’s notice how much the public enjoys it. How much they screamed, how they sang with him, how they enjoyed this party.

Even without knowing Käärijä, you can feel he put his whole self into this. And the public felt it too.

And the final result was astonishing: he got 376 points from the public. It’s the second-highest public score, after Kalush Orchestra, who got 439 points.

If you notice, Käärijä’s percentage is even higher than Kalush Orchestra’s! And such a high result means one thing and one thing only: the public has chosen its winner. He is the winner. People are sovereign and people’s will has been very clear about it. So when I say he’s the winner, it’s not because I want to indulge him: it’s because it’s the fucking truth.

Also, please notice the kind of songs the public chose as their top 3 favorites: songs with nothing mainstream and native languages. All while the jury thinks what we want is the same boring shit we can hear on the radio 24/7.

______________________________

A painful evening

Let me start by making something clear: I don’t hate Loreen and I don’t hate Sweden. It’s not their fault if they win. They are just exploiting the situation, because they learned what the good formula is and keep using it over and over.

Loreen knows that if she sends another song that is just like all the others she made, she will get a high position. And now, thanks to yesterday’s victory, she knows she doesn’t even have to try. Why should she do something different, when doing the same thing twice made her win twice? Why try something different, why step out of her comfort zone? If she does the same thing, she can win. So she will keep doing the same thing.

Same goes for the entire country of Sweden. They learned that if they bring the most boring, generic pop song you can listen to on every radio on planet Earth, you will win. So, they will keep sending it. After all, a bland pop song is what the world is more accustomed to, so why change? Why do something different, when they can be teacher’s pet and always get a high score? This isn’t being stupid, this is being clever.

But is it elegant and fair too? Oh honey, absolutely not. This is the exact opposite of what elegance and fairness are.

On Saturday evening, when we reached the voting part of the show, the crowd literally CHEERED AND SANG Käärijä’s name or “Cha Cha Cha”. Multiple times.

Once the public clearly states who they want to win, then the competition is over. When the consensus is unanimous, there’s no competition anymore. The winner is already here. Everything else is just white noise and bureaucracy.

That’s what I felt, while I was forced to keep listening to a bunch of people loudly kissing Sweden’s ass. The public had already decided, we already have a winner. Why are we still wasting time?

And if forcing us to keep listening to this pitiful charade was not enough, the hosts decided to lose that shred of elegance that was still left on this joke of a show and not only shushed the public all time but even said “just ignore everyone”, as if their voices didn’t really matter. It’s not like this is a music competition and the public is the final receiver of said music, after all.

I don’t know you, but I don’t like to see the sovereign public being silenced and told they do not matter, all while a bunch of people takes the decisions for them. Maybe the Brits are accustomed to being silenced because an old rich man has to decide for them, but other countries don’t work like that. Like, you know, the one they’re hosting the competition for.

There was nothing democratic about Saturday evening. There was nothing fair in silencing the public and pretending they haven’t chosen their winner one hour ago, because teacher’s pet had to win again.

Do you really think Sweden deserved this victory more than Finland? Do you really think that a country that won six times needed to add this victory to their list, so they can say “ah ah we won as many times as Ireland”? Or just because they can do their stupid ABBA anniversary next year? Is this the reason why we choose our winner, now? The past glories of a country? Well, then in 2048 is the anniversary of Dana International’s winning song, let’s all go to Israel! And in 2056 we’ll go to Finland, because it’s the anniversary of Lordi’s winning. And in 2071 will be 50 years from the Maneskin’s victory, so let’s come back to Italy.

What, does that sound ridiculous? Tell that to the jury, then.

I feel immensely sorry for the Finnish people, because I read online how much this victory could’ve meant for them. This could’ve been so important, such a good chance to shine for a country that considers their language “too weird” and who hasn’t won in 17 years. And since they are stuck between that ticking bomb that is Russia and the always perfect Sweden, they really needed something that gave them more positive attention.

And it broke my heart even more to see Käärijä suffering. He even apologized to his nation. He did something amazing and he still apologized. He literally won and apologized for not winning. That’s unfairness to its finest.

And if all of this is not enough, the results of the public’s vote came out and oh, look, not a single country gave 12 points to Sweden, while almost every country gave 12 points to Finland. Wow, who would’ve fucking guessed that teacher’s pet won because of the teacher.

Again: does that seem fair and democratic to you?

______________________________

Oligarchy masqueraded as democracy

Let’s do a little bit of math, shall we?

Each national jury consists of five people + one backup juror. They supposedly vote for the best singer and performance- AHAHAH great joke, very funny.

But let’s not focus on this, now: let’s focus on numbers.

37 countries participated this year. So 37 x 6 = 222. The jury is made up of 222 people in total.

The entire population of Europe is around 451 million people, but let’s keep it low because Eurovision isn’t watched by all Europeans. Let’s take just the number of views on the Youtube streaming of the Grand Finale: 9.5 million people. Let’s round up to 9 million, okay?

Okay, so now we have 222 people on one side and 9 million people on the other. Let’s pretend that less than half of them voted at least one time.

Okay, now look me straight in the eyes and explain why the votes of 222 people should have the same weight as the votes of 4 million people. Please, explain to me how democratic this decision is, can’t wait to hear it.

But you know what? Even if it was 1 million voters only, that wouldn’t have been fair either. In no universe is fair to put one million voters on the same level as 222 voters.

There’s only one possible scenario in which this is fair: if Eurovision was a talent show specifically centered around performances and voices, with a jury made of vocal teachers and choreographers, and all I have to do is passively watch it on my couch.

But from the moment you gave the public the power to choose who the winner could be, then why do the votes of all the people from Europe (and Australia) have the same weight as what 222 people decided?

This isn’t a democracy. This is an oligarchy masquerading as a democracy: a bunch of people decides what you should like, basing their decision on their own interests. And you have no way to oppose them, unless you focus all your votes on one single artist, hoping it would defeat the one the jury chooses.

But this deprives Eurovision of the competition aspect. It’s not a competition if I have to endure a tug-of-war against the jury. It’s not a competition if I am forced to give all of my votes to one artist only, instead of spreading them out to all my favorites. And even in that case, basically all of Europe should vote for that specific artist to try and overcome the sheer power the jury has. Again: does this sound democratic to you?

Now you may say: but the jury is made of experts. Oh, you mean the same experts that proved multiple times they base their votes on politics, who their neighbor is and who can corrupt them better? Or do you mean the same experts that in the past made their choice even without listening to the songs?

The truth is that we have 222 people who can easily be influenced by anything and their power is as strong as the power of 4 million people at least. Four million people, who got invested and followed the entire show from start to finish, if I may add. Please, tell me about the fairness of this system again.

And before you say “but Eurovision is a music competition and we need experts”... sorry, but no. According to Wikipedia, the jury was present before televoting was born, but once televoting was extended to all competing countries (1997 ca.), the jury was no more. It came back only in 2009, with this unfair compromise of 50/50 between jury ad public votes.

So there was a period of time in which there wasn’t a jury and in that period we had the first win for Estonia, Turkey, Latvia, Greece, Finland, Serbia and Russia. How weird that, once the jury isn’t there, other nations have a chance to win too.

The thing is: Eurovision isn’t a simple music competition. It’s more like a window. A window where anyone can have their chance to shine. No matter if you’re from a well-known country and everyone knows who you are or if you’re from a tiny piece of land in the middle of nowhere and all you can do is speak your native language: if you have the right combination of song+performance+voice, you can win.

And it’s beautiful we have this window, because it allows us to see something we’ve never seen before: rock bands, silly songs, folk songs and straight-up weird songs. In Eurovision, you don’t have to listen to just the same generic bland song, but you are allowed to listen to different artists and different cultures - and if you like them, you are free to choose your winner, no matter how not mainstream it is.

And we Europeans need this. We need to celebrate the diversity of Europe and embrace them. We need to see people from different countries hanging out, having fun and becoming best friends. For a continent that has always had (and still has) a problem with wars, we need something that allows us to look at each other and not see a piece of land to conquer, but a place full of life and culture to learn about.

And since we pride ourselves to be the continent where democracy was born, let’s put this democracy in the show we’re so proud of. Do we really need the jury vote? Do we really need the vote of this bunch of people? Okay, let’s have them. But it’s not acceptable to give them the same weight as the public’s vote. 50/50 isn’t acceptable anymore. 20/80 is fairer. I’m feeling nice, we can even do a 30/70. It’s just not acceptable that 300 people should have power over millions over something those same millions will enjoy. As always, the public is sovereign.

And if the public’s taste is shit, at least we will be free to blame ourselves for something we brought unto ourselves - and not feel sick and angry over something others forced upon us.

Or everything can stay the same and the 50/50 system will keep going. But at least, be honest enough to not waste everyone’s time, by pretending the public can do something more than watch what a bunch of people decide for them. Do not pretend to be righteous and democratic, when you’re not.

______________________________

The triumph of people

This finale drained me. If it were just a little fairer, I would’ve been thrilled to see Luxembourg coming back after years. But right now I don’t feel like watching next year’s show. I know it will probably be amazing, because Sweden is very good at hosting. But I don’t want to see them masturbating over how good they are and how much they deserved to win - even if they didn’t win.

And, honestly, I don’t care about ABBA either. I don’t give a damn about them, nor about their anniversary. I’m definitely not looking forward to that either.

I will listen to the songs as always, then I might give it a try and watch the semifinals. It depends on how bitter my grudge will be, after one full year. If it will still be very bitter, I will probably spend my time better, by listening to the songs more times, watching the performances and making my own personal final chart. I won’t have ABBA or funny interval acts, but I can try my best to make it enjoyable to read. And it won’t be a fucking charade, at least.

Sorry, but I will keep being bitter for some time. And if you feel bitter too, you have every right to be, no matter what people say. Your voice has been silenced and ignored and numbers don’t lie. It’s very understandable you feel bad.

But you know what you can do? Use your anger in a positive way. And no, that doesn’t mean sending death threats to Loreen. You can accuse Sweden of its lack of elegance and decorum if you want, but always be polite. Don’t be like some of them, who are such sore losers they had the guts to be angry at Finland because it didn’t give Sweden any public points. Bo-hoo, may I add.

What you can do instead is make some noise: ask for the jury to be abolished or for this shitty system to change. And, even more important, support your winners. A lot of amazing artists have been wronged this year, so shower them with love.

And send your love especially towards our winner. Stream Cha Cha Cha, check his other songs, shower him with love and support, make a statue for him in Vantaa, pay me a plane ticket because I need to tackle him in a hug and tell him how much the world loves him. Let’s show the world that he slaps, Finnish slaps and we want more of this.

Do you still need more Cha Cha Cha in your life? Good news: Lord of the Lost made a cover for Cha Cha Cha and OH MY GOSH it’s insanely good. It has a lot of Rammstein vibes, it’s cool and it slaps even harder. Check it out because it’s amazing!

Also because the German singer learned some Finnish, just to spell every word correctly and, according to the Finnish people in the comment section, he did a great job. What a wholesome guy, I love and stan him and his band - and you should do the same, because they are amazing and they don’t deserve last place <3

And if you need more Käärijä in your life, there are amazing Youtube channels with great collections of his moments, like Eurovision Is Ambition and Uni Dash Corn. I especially suggest you see his bromance with Bojan - and speaking of him, another shoutout to Bojan! He’s such a nice, wholesome guy with great charisma, you cannot hate him. I am not head over heels for his song, but he’s so fucking wholesome, he deserves good things only.

And I also suggest you see how Käärijä has been welcomed in Helsinki. He has been welcomed like a fucking hero, a national treasure. And of course he was: he is the true winner after all, he deserved the welcome only winners get.

It’s a bit like he said in his apology: the better one won. And so he did.

You know, I think the only good thing that came out from this shitshow that was Eurovision 2023, is the people’s heart. People showed their kindness, their love, the best of humankind. We saw acts of friendship, we saw empathy and appreciation. The hug between Käärijä and Bojan, despite its sad meaning, is also a perfect example of what we all should be: kinder, softer, more empathetic, together, no matter how far and different our countries are.

In a way, I am happy that Ukraine’s message of unity was still carried out, even if indirectly and definitely not the way the UK wanted.

And in the end, the trophy isn’t so important: it’s just a piece of glass after all. And no piece of glass is worth the impact one little man from Vantaa left on so many people all over the world.

I know you will never read this post, but I wish you a lifetime of success, Käärijä. You have everything a winner needs and, in fact, you are one. So don’t be too hard on yourself, because the world still needs to show you how much it loves you. Take your time, relax, have fun and come back when you’re ready - just don’t leave us hanging for too much, ‘kay?

And you, Finnish people: please treat our beloved winner with love for us too. We will do our best from afar, so let’s be together on this as we should <3

[wokeupinmars]

Forever Flowers and a Perfect Night

Pairing: Colt Seavers x Medic!Reader

Summary: Colt finally addresses the lingering feelings between him and his favorite medic

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1.3K

Please comment and/or reblog if you enjoyed this!!

RG Masterlist

Colt winced as you cleaned the cut right on his cheek. “Oh quit being a baby, you’ve had worse,” you hush him. 

“Are you this mean to all the other stuntmen?” he asks, as you apply antiseptic cream to the wound. “The other stunt guys aren’t as crabby as you are.” 

He pouts, “I am not crabby.”

“You’re right, you aren’t, at least not normally,” you admit, covering the cut with a bandaid. “Chin up, Honey,” you instruct. Colt obliges, giving you access to the abrasions on his chin and jaw. You apply a layer of Vaseline to the scrapes. “If I’m not crabby then what am I?” he questions.

You let out a hum, “Normally? You’re real sweet.” You hand him a thermos, “Thought you could use this,” you murmur, taking off your gloves and tossing them in the trash.

Colt unscrews the top and is immediately met with the smell of coffee. He lets out a slight groan, “Have I told you I loved you today?” he asks before taking a sip. 

You shake your head and turn away not wanting him to see the amused look on your face. “I saw that!” he says, excitedly. “I don't know what you’re talking about,” you murmur, putting away your supplies. 

“C’mon, don’t do that to me, Sunshine…depriving me of your smile is just cruel.” You roll your eyes at him and plop down next to him, “Laying it on thick today, huh?” Colt has a dopey smile on his face as he wraps an arm around your shoulder, “How long are we going to do this dance?” 

You allow him to pull you close, “What dance?” 

“You pretending that you don’t have feelings for me and me pretending that I can’t see right through your little act,” Colt answers. “Sounds like you’ve taken too many blows to the head. Didn’t check for a concussion this time, probably should have” You muse, as Colt’s hand falls from your shoulder to your hip, rubbing circles against the fabric of your pants. 

“Don’t act like you don’t like me,” he tells you. 

“I tolerate you at best,” you quip. 

“That’s a lie and you know it, the only person you tolerate is Tom, and you barely do that as is. You like me, you like like me,” he replies. 

“Like like? What are we in? The third grade?” 

Colt grins, “You’re not denying it.” 

You pause for a moment, “Okay, I’ll bite. Suppose I did like you. Then what? What happens next?” You question. “All hypothetical, of course,” you add. 

His smile widens and he pulls you in a little closer, happy that you were entertaining him instead of shutting it down. “Hypothetically speaking…if you did like me, romantically, then I’d ask why you haven’t let me take you out yet?” 

“Well that’s simple, you never asked,” you reply. 

Colt takes a sip of coffee and then speaks, “So if I were to ask, you would say yes?” You rest your head on his chest, “There's only one way to find out.”

He opens his mouth to say something but he stops when Dan’s voice blares through the walkie-talkie. “Colt! Ryder left the set for lunch and never came back. The director wants you to stand in as a body double for the shot.” 

You take a deep breath and exhale, patting his shoulder as you get up, “Sounds like duty calls.” He catches your hand before you walk away, “You get off at seven today, right?” 

“Keeping tabs on me, Seavers?” you tease. 

Colt smirks, “Just observant…is it alright if I drop by your place later?” 

“It is,” you tell him, “Got something planned?” He hums, “Something like that, I gotta make a quick stop or two and then I’ll be over at yours by nine?”

“Works for me, Honey,” you say softly, caressing his cheek. 

“Wrap it up lovebirds,” Dan’s voice, tears Colt’s focus from you. “You can put the moves on your girl later, but for right now, you're needed on set.” You try to ignore the way your cheeks heat up at being referred to as Colt’s girl. 

Dan claps Colt on the back as they walk back to set. Colt glances back, shooting you a wink and the same smile you’ve grown all too familiar with, before putting his sunglasses on. You smile back and watch them go. 

————

A set of rhythmic knocks hit the door to your apartment, at nine o'clock on the dot. 

You open up the door after glancing through the peephole. “Hi, Colt” 

“Hi,” he says with a sweet smile. “I come bearing gifts,” he adds holding up the two bags, one which was a plain green reusable shopping bag and the other was a white plastic bag with the logo of your favorite takeout spot. You step aside and open the door wider for him, “Come in, Hon.” 

Colt walks in and he sets both bags down on your coffee table. “I got your favorite and,” he takes a box out of the green bag, “Flowers” 

A smile graces my face, “Legos.” Colt nods, “I wanted to get you flowers, but then I thought about that saying about how flowers given out of love last longer so I figured why not give you ones that do last forever.” His words make your heart melt. 

You walk over to him, wrapping your arms around him, “You’re really living up to your nickname.” His arms snake around your waist and hold you close, “Wanna put on a movie? We can eat and watch while we build the flowers, and talk about going on a date.” 

“I think this counts as a date,” you state. Colt pulls away slightly to look down at you, “Yeah? You’re happy with this being our first date and not being wined and dined at a fancy restaurant?”

You hum contently, “Sounds like a perfect first date to me…we can wine and dine another time.” 

So there you two were, seated on the floor of your living room, building the legos and taking bites of food every so often while Meet the Robinsons plays absentmindedly in the background. 

“Would you really have said yes if I asked you out earlier?” he asks. 

You nod your head, chewing and swallowing the food in your mouth before answering, “Yeah, I would have said something but I wasn’t sure if you actually liked me or it was just friendly flirting.” 

He attaches the head of the last rose to the stem, “Just friendly flirting over the past three years? Sweetheart, I think I was one kiss on the cheek away from losing my mind.” You hold an egg roll up to his mouth and he takes a bite, “And here I thought you liked it when I kissed you better,” you tease.

“That was the problem,” he says with his mouth full. You grin and bite into the other half of the eggroll. 

The night carries on and the two of you end up snuggling on the couch watching reruns of The Nanny. You laid on his chest, his heart was thumping under your ear. You tilt your head up to look at him, he’s already looking at you. “I’d say this is a pretty good first date," he mumbles.

“Almost perfect,” you affirm. 

Colt raises an eyebrow, “Almost? What can I do to make it perfect?” His fingers run up and down your back, tracing your spine. You shift up and lean down, “Everyone knows any good date ends with a kiss.” A smirk spreads across his face, he puts his hand on the back of your neck, “Can I?” 

“Please,” you whisper, leaning in further. He meets you halfway and presses a tender kiss to his lips.

“You’re blushing,” you whisper, taking a good look at him after you both pull away. “So are you,” Colt whispers before going in for another.

[pretty-little-mind33]

Thank you to everyone who sent in a request! ily! enjoy the ABBA theme since T.S titles are for full fics 🫶

~ Masterlist Includes ~ James Potter Tangerine Dave Lizewski Pietro Maximoff Tom Ryder

MAIN MASTERLIST HERE

fluff ✿ angst ✮ hurt & comfort ✷ smut (nsfm) ♥︎

James Potter

OUR LAST SUMMER ✿ - Your best friend "helps" you organize your old belongings to move them to the cellar.

TAKE A CHANCE ON ME ✮ - You want to help your boyfriend with his prank but it goes horribly wrong (happy ending)

HEAD OVER HEELS ✿♥︎- You stay over at your boyfriend's house for the holidays.

LAY ALL YOUR LOVE ON ME ✷ - Girls can be mean and your boyfriend isn't having any of it.

DOES YOUR MOTHER KNOW ✿♥︎ - James is older than you so he thinks he knows better and it pisses you off.

VOULEZ-VOUS ✮ - Nothing is as it seems.

Tangerine

HONEY HONEY ✿ - Sharing a bed with Tangerine is less awkward than you'd anticipated, at least for you.

ONE OF US ✿✮ - Seeing your ex for a job is the worst possible scenario—you think?

WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE ✿ - You try and take Tangerine to the movies to cheer him up.

ANDANTE, ANDANTE ✷ - Tangerine accidentally hurts your feelings.

MAMMA MIA ✿ - Tangerine doesn't like when you go on dates. The reason? Currently unknown.

I STILL HAVE FAITH IN YOU ✷ -Your boyfriend makes you feel unloved in some stupid misunderstanding he quickly remedies.

SHOULD I LAUGH OR CRY? ✿✷ - You hurt yourself with Tangerine's brass knuckles.

Dave Lizewski

KNOWING ME, KNOWING YOU ✿- Being partners with Kick-Ass is far more intimidating when you have a huge crush on him, especially when he won't stop talking about his crush.

DANCING QUEEN ✿ - You convince your best friend to take you to Prom—only as friends, of course.

IF IT WASN'T FOR THE NIGHTS ✿✷ - You're having a bad day and you and Dave share earbuds on the bus.

LITTLE THINGS ✷ - Dave loses his patience with you when studying and then feels super bad.

Pietro Maximoff

FERNANDO ✿- You don't want to share a bed with Pietro. He wants nothing more than to share one with you.

GIMME! GIMME! GIMME! (A Man After Midnight) ✿ - You and Pietro are just friends, right?

GONNA SING YOU MY LOVE SONG ♥︎ - You and your boyfriend come back from a date and he's desperate to get his hands on you.

WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE ME? ✿ - Pietro almost misses your birthday.

VOULEZ-VOUS ✮ - Nothing is as it seems.

Tom Ryder

THE WINNER TAKES IT ALL ✿ - You try and convince Tom Ryder that doing his own stunt out of the blue is a very very bad decision.

ANGELEYES ♥︎- Tom fucking you in his bed.

WATERLOO ♥︎ - Helping Tom with his big problem.

THE NAME OF THE GAME ✷ - Tom makes stupid stupid decisions.

[crqstalite]

also thinkin abt writing a post-mea fic where i get to write everyone at a nexus gala. i think itd be funny lol

[tangerinesgf]

Okay but imagine Tom Ryder falling for a fan who has ZERO and I mean zero clue on him being famous. Like he met the fan on accident and then was expecting the fan to go crazy when seeing him but the fan wasn’t even interested

And he’s like so into it becuase this hasn’t happened to him before!

Also female reader as the fan!!!

Tags/warnings: nothing I think.. Tom being an ass before being nice.

A/N: this was really fun to write. I'll be honest i had to keep myself from making him too much of an asshole, but i think this is pretty in character. Anywaysss tysm for your request and i hope you like itt<3

Tom Ryder has never met someone who doesn't know him. He's the biggest star of the world, everyone and their mother's knew about him. Or at least that's what he thought.

He was at his favorite coffee shop, undercover with a hat and black sunglasses. Usually he'd love the attention and praise from his fans, but today he wasn't really in the mood.

As the barista hands him his coffee order (a grande Caramel macchiato, 1/3 whole milk, 1/3 almond milk, 1/3 soy milk, 1 shot of extra espresso decaf, whipped cream and caramel drizzle on top), Ryder turns away to walk out of the shop.

Without noticing he drops his bank card which he used to pay with. You notice this while standing behind him in line and pick the card up.

"Oh, sir!" You call out as you rush after him.

Tom sighs and rolls his eyes before turning around to face the girl. "Here we go.." He mutters to himself.

"You dropped your-"

He instantly cuts you off before you can even finish your sentence. "Yeah, yeah it's me I'm amazing and the hottest man you've ever seen blah blah I know.."

You stare at him for a bit while still holding onto his card. "What?"

"What do you mean what?" He looks annoyed, you're wasting his time every second that he stands there facing you.

"I found your card.. what are you talking about?" You hold the card up to show him, your face still scrunched up in confusion.

"I'm Tom Ryder. Did you honestly not recognize me?" He raises his eyebrow at you. Is this girl stupid? He thinks to himself.

"Was I supposed to?"

"Yes. Everyone does I'm Tom Ryder." He says almost baffled that you don't recognize him.

"You keep saying your name but it doesn't ring a bell." You shrug your shoulder

"Tom Ryder." He repeats once again as if saying it for the third time would help. "Action Pact franchise? Hot Earth? Bad Cop, Good Dog? Metalstorm? How about biggest moviestar of the world?" He explains to you like you're a child.

"Oh I did hear about Metalstorm. Isn't that with that actress Iggy? Was that her name? She's cool."

"What no- I mean yes she is in it, but it's my movie. I'm the lead actor." Tom says in an agitated tone. How could you not know him, everyone knows him. Yet for some reason you kept staring at him with those confused eyes. Those beautiful confused eyes..

"Right well- good for you." It's a genuine smile, it's adorable. Why are you smiling at him like that? You should be wanting to jump on him out of excitement. Tom has never felt so confused in his life.

"Don't you watch movies at all?" He questions you.

"Ofcours I do. Indie movies." You say with a soft smile on your face.

Indie movies. Right. Tom Ryder was known for big budget blockbuster films, not smallscale indie stuff. Although now that he thinks about it everything could be a blockbuster with his name attatched to it.

"Right- so my face means nothing to you?"

"I mean.. I guess it looks slightly familiar but no.. not really. Sorry." You smile apologetically.

A strange sensation washes over Tom as he realizes this girl does not care about him at all. It's oddly humbeling even for him. "No it's fine I guess, I just never met someone who isn't crazy about me."

"Well I could still do that." You chuckle and finally hand the bank card back to him. "I'll just pretend to be obsessed with you and then you can roll your eyes at me or something."

"You'd really make a fool out of yourself for me?" He raises his eyebrow at you. Sure he's used to everyone doing everything for him whenever he asks, but this felt nice, less forced than usual.

"Yeah, look." You smile and then turn your back to him. A second later you turn to face him again, your face laced with excitement.

"Oh my god, you're Tom Ryder! I've seen like all your movies and you're so cool and hot and so amazing. Can we take a picture oh and an autograph, will you marry me?!" You say acting like an obsessed fangirl that's in love with him.

"Alright alright.. I get it." He laughs, readjusting the sunglasses on his face. He was starting to like her more and more.

"Really? I can go on if you'd like. There's this whole part where I improvise your part in a movie." Yoi brush your hair back from where it had fallen in front of your face and Tom's eyes can't help but linger at every move you make.

"No it's alright." He chuckles. "But I will say you're missing out. I've won many awards ya know. I'm not just a pretty face." He says with a grin on his face, trying to impress her.

"Never said you were. Maybe I should go see your new film at the cinema then." You tease playfully.

He chuckles softly at that. The idea of you going to see his movie made him excited. He wanted to know what you'd think about the film eventhough he had just met you 5 minutes ago. Then an idea suddenly pops into his head.

"I have a better idea. How would you like to go to the premiere, hm?" He grins

A/N: Tysm for reading I hope you enjoyed it!! Comments and reblogs are so much appreciated you don't even understand. Love you guyss<3

Taglist: @earth-elemental18 @cockete @allaroundjejje (lemme know if you wanna be removed/added)

[thefiery-phoenix]

YANDERE BATBOYS WITH A READER WHO HAS FICTIONAL CRUSHES

Honestly I wouldn't put it past them to explode with rage and jealousy and act like clingy petty children to you

Dick Grayson: If there's one thing he feels proud of in life is the amount of love he has for you. He feels like no one else can love you like him and he knows you better than you know yourself. Thr first time he finds out that you really like a fictional character was when you both were having a movie night with the other Titans as a day for rest and relaxation since you guys need some chill in life. The movie you guys were watching was Rapunzel and you really liked the movie. You told Dick that you've wanted to grow your hair as long as Rapunzel when you were a kid and he pretended not to know about it but in fact he already did know about it since this sneaky son of a bish here already read your diary that mentioned it. He feels like there should be no secrets between the two of you since you're destined to be with each other and you're soulmates and one person. He knew you liked Rapunzel which was why he made the suggestion of watching it that day but what he wasn't prepared for was when you suddenly said "Damn Flynn be looking good" and he suddenly felt his heart skip a beat. What exactly did you mean by that comment? Garfield turned to you and spoke "Wait don't tell me you have a crush on him?"as he grinned in amusement as you shrugged your shoulders and replied "Believe it or not he was one of my childhood crushes" and Dick felt his hand twitch with irritation. ONE of your childhood crushes? So that clearly meant that there were more and he was determined to find out who the bloody hell were these pathetic sneaky pests who dared to steal the heart of his lovely angel when it was clearly reserved for him

"How about we watch something else?"said Dick as his eye twitched with irritation but you didn't want to change the movie so he ended up tolerating the damn movie for the next 2 hours for the sake of your happiness. But he swears to get rid of that bloody movie and make you forget about that damned Flynn Ryder because the only man you should be thinking about is him

Jason Todd: He doesn't become delusional and descend down the rabbit hole of madness and chasm of obsession right off the bat yet. There's still time for him to become delusional as hell and it all started when he first met you as Red Hood when he was patrolling the streets around Gotham. It was really late at night and you were coming back from the public library after doing some research for your Physics paper in college that would count for at least 50 percent of your grade. You really needed to work hard and up your game since your Physics professor was a hardass and had no chill in life whatsoever and you didn't want to flunk out of the class. You'd just gotten a headache after studying so much and you were looking forward to relaxing after you went home. You kept walking when suddenly you stopped in the middle of the road to rub your head for a few minutes and your eyes since your vision was starting to get blurred but that was a huge mistake on your part because a car was moving with a really high speed and the driver was honking at you to get out of the way. You'd have been literal roadkill had it not been for the Red Hood himself who pulled you out of harm's way. "W-whats going on?"you mumbled as he chuckled and replied "You're so tired you didn't even realize your life was in danger" and he offered to drop you off home since it was evident that you couldn't be trusted in such a condition. He made sure you were safe in your bed and felt bad when he saw you with no one else in your house. Was that why you weren't taking care of yourself properly and not sleeping early? Jason made sure you went to sleep and he wrote a note for you that said 'Take better care of yourself darling' and placed it near your bed table. The next morning when you woke up you saw the note and you smiled, it felt nice to have someone care for you

You were hoping to meet the Red Hood again the next day evening and sure enough you were lucky since you did end up meeting him. "I have a box of muffins with me that I made. Would you like some? You know, a way of saying a thank you from my side for saving me yesterday" and he was stunned. After all these years of protecting and looking after Gotham you were the first person who actually thanked him for his deeds. He felt happy since a really long time as he accepted it and thanked you for it. The next day you met Jason at the library but not as Red Hood, as regular Jason though and you both bonded over the books there. He offered to help you with some stories you were working on and he was like your second pair of eyes offering you constructive feedback of your works and he loved reading every line and word you've written

The two of you bonded over a period of time and you decided to have a movie night one day after your college's term finished. You invited Jason over and you already had snacks and drinks ready. Jason was just glad you didn't invite any of your pesky little friends over he despised them from the bottom of his heart. To him they were nothing but corrupt leeches who wanted to ruin you while he was protecting you from all the negative and bad things in the world. You didn't need to know all the dark stuff happening around you, and you can also thank him for the cancelation of your newspaper subscription. Who needs the news anyway, it's filled with utter nonsense and garbage these days anyway according to him

You both watched some movies and then this show called Supernatural popped up on your recommended list so you both decided to watch that. Jason actually liked Dean Winchester he thought he was cool and he could actually relate to his problems in a way. At first when you started gushing about Dean Winchester he didn't seem to mind. It was just a little fictional crush but when you told him that you had all the merchandise of his and you even had a freaking body pillow of Dean that's when things took another turn. Jason couldn't help but feel jealous and he knows it's silly being jealous of a fictional character but he can't help it. As selfish as he is, he wants you to think of him, the only man you'll ever need in your life. When Jason sees your body pillow of Dean Winchester his hand twitched with irritation and made a mental note to burn it to ash when you weren't noticing. He doesn't like it when you ignore him for your fictional characters, just pay him some attention as well and you're good to go but if you keep gushing about those fictional crushes of yours he might have to step in and when he does you'll have to say goodbye to your movie watching marathons

Tim Drake: I can imagine Tim actually vibing with you and your fictional characters that you're so fond of especially if they're anime characters. He really loves anime. You guys met online on Discord in an anime server when some random bozo was saying stuff like how Eren Yeager sucked in season 4 but you had a different take to that opinion and when you put forth your opinion you revived some major hate and backlash from that person calling you a dumb person and a bunch of other nasty names that made you feel pissed off. Fortunately for you, someone came to your defense and that someone was none other than Tim Drake himself. He called him out for behaving like a douchebag and basically started an internet flame war with that person. Then you thanked him for sticking up for you and you both chatted with each other for a while at a private chat room till you had to get going but you felt happy that you'd gained a new online friend. You both chatted with each other for a few weeks and you were ecstatic when you'd learnt that he went to the same school as you, Gotham academy and you were determined to meet him so you arranged for the two of you to meet at the music room of Gotham Academy too which he'd agreed

Truth was, Tim already knew who you were right off the bat without your knowledge. There's a reason he's called a whiz with technology you know. He was just keeping his identity anonymous to humor you and wanted to see your reaction when the guy sitting right next to you during your Advanced Calculus class was your online friend. You waited for your online friend to show up and sure enough he did and it was none other than Tim himself. Your eyes widened with surprise and you spoke "Tim, I can't believe you're the one I was talking to this whole time, this is amazing" you smiled and he felt glad you saw this as a positive scenario. The two of you had your lunch together and started spending more time with each other in person. The thing about Tim is that when he falls in love with someone, he falls in love really fast and hard. He loves someone with a lot of intensity and passion, words nor numbers couldn't describe the feelings he felt for you. He was also someone who believed in love at first sight and when he found out that you were his online friend from Discord he was extremely thrilled and his joy knew no bounds. Of course he had to keep you a secret from his brothers since they'd tease him and they'd try to flirt with you and steal you away from him which is something he doesn't want happening at all

He's so used to being the replacement in his life but for once he wanted to be selfish and have you for himself. He was growing obsessive over you and his affection for you might be deemed as suffocating for other people but you failed to notice the red flags in his behavior like him being clingy to you when you talked to someone else and when you you him about the guy who flirted with you during your biology lecture he got suspended for the possession of drugs that Tim may or may not have planted in his locker and anonymously tipped off a teacher. He was just trying to keep you safe in this dark and cruel world, and he should know how bad the world is because he's Red Robin

Your exams were done and you'd decided to have an anime marathon with him and he invited you over to the Wayne manor. Of course Dick, Jason and Damian were cocky when you'd shown up and started flirting with you just to tease and rile up Tim because watching him getting riled up was the amusement of the century according to them. Tim's face grew red and he 'accidentally' spilled some water on Dick and Jason as he stepped on Damian's foot and he dragged you inside to his room and shut the door. He could hear them snickering to themselves as Jason howled "Use protection" as he just rolled his eyes and you looked confused. "They're immature jerks, so should we get started?'' and you nodded as you watched animes like My hero academia, Haikyuu, Demon slayer, Bungou Stray dogs and many more. You wanted to watch Kakegurui as well but Tim didn't want you to taint your innocence and it was filled with some not so wholesome content according to him that wasn't suitable for your delicate eyes

You had some favorite characters from different Fandoms and the character you were really fond of was Daisuke Kanbe from the anime Millionaire detective balance unlimited. Tim could get why you liked Daisuke a lot and he vibes with your choice too. He will however get a tad bit jealous that you're not paying attention to him and he'll do something or the other to interrupt your anime fest and make sure you pay attention to him. Other than that he's actually pretty chill with you crushing over animme characters but like every other possessive yandere dude he will have to curb it and make you forget about your anime crushes if it gets too out of hand. He doesn't want to lose you to some Pixelated non existant 2D picture on a screen

BONUS: Damian Wayne: Oh boy, I can say for sure he won't be too happy about this whole ordeal of you simping for non existant Pixelated fiends according to him when you have THE heir of the Wayne family and the Al Ghul heir himself. It's been a few months since he's kidnapped you and taken you for himself and he had to do it you know. The first time he met you was when you were about to climb a huge rock ready to dive in because a puppy was drowning. As much as he was touched with your love and concern for animals he couldn't let you just endanger your life like that which was why he had to step in and do something before you'd ended up getting hurt. Damian raced to where you were about to jump and pulled you back in time and before you could say a word he dove in and rescued the puppy. The poor puppy had a bleeding paw and you let a soft gasp of despair when you saw its bleeding paw

You really loved animals and that sight just broke your heart. "I have a feeling someone must have done this to the poor thing, why else would a puppy intentionally go to the middle of the river if it doesn't know how to swim?" you asked Damian as you snuggled the little thing against you, the puppy grateful for the warmth it was receiving from you. "Take care of it and yourself too, I hope you don't do something as reckless as that ever again" said Damian with a serious note but you looked at him indignantly and replied "The poor thing would have drowned had I been a second late. Besides I know how to swim" you grumped a bit and Damian found it to be endearing and the two of you exchanged numbers and parted ways after that exchange took place. That night he wasn't able to forget about you and he made sure to visit the same place next day to make sure you and the puppy were doing all right. He didn't even know why he was so concerned about someone he just met but seeing you do something as reckless as that made him want to protect you and just wrap you with his arms so you couldn't endanger yourself. What were you making him feel?

Sure enough the next day Damian saw you and the puppy and he was glad to see it doing okay. The both of you spent some time together and you liked spending time with him. Though he had a stoic expression most of the times you could tell deep down he cared for other people. He took you to a Cafe where you both ordered something and you went to see Titus his dog. Titus seemed to take a liking to you immediately and the puppy too. Titus kept wandering near your legs and Damian thought it was adorable when he tried to place his paws up on you as if he was asking you to lift him up like a child. The puppy was a bit shy around him but Titus didn't seem to mind

Soon it was time for you to go home and Damian didn't want you to leave. He wanted you to stay with him and with a heavy heart he had to bid farewell to you. However it didn't mean that his mind and heart rested though, Gotham was a dangerous place and in the little time he's known you he's already taken a liking to you which meant that he's appointed himself as your guardian and protector to keep you safe from this twisted world and so day by day he kept stalking you and kept an eye on you to make sure you were all right

Finally he reached a point where his obsession could no longer be contained and he needed you like a dying man needing air so he kidnapped you and took you for himself. Does he regret it? Not an inch because the way he sees it is that you both are destined to be together forever. He felt his heart break when he saw you crying your heart out, begging him to please take you back and even after he bought you your puppy for company you still avoided him like the Corona virus. However you just started opening up to him recently and that was something he felt immensely thankful for. You finally saw that he loved you with all his heart and he wouldn't harm you and besides you were tired of being alone all the time

Currently the two of you were watching some shows together and you decided to watch Austin and Ally after you'd insisted. You loved Austin and Ally since you were a kid it brought back so many memories and when you accidentally let the fact slip that Austin used to be your childhood crush Damian felt like someone had knocked the wind out of his chest. Just what EXACTLY did you see in that immature blonde haired Walmart Ken ripoff he didn't know but he needed to make sure you'd forget about this Austin fellow effective immediately. Damian doesn't care if he's being petty, he doesn't want your heart getting stolen by someone else. Your heart is reserved only for him and he'll have various tactics to make you forget about Austin. He'll either make sure you watch something else that's different or when you try to see Austin and Ally he'll just start bragging and boasting about how much better he is than him and pin point and nit pick EVERYTHING wrong with Austin. Like mentioned before no man can steal your heart as long as he's with you

[burins]

I read a LOT of books this year, which is always exciting. I also neglected to do much in the way of write ups during the year proper, so here are little opinions about all 84(!) book-books I read. I love to yap about what I read and I would love to talk about any and all of these. (Graphic novels and comics are gonna be their own post because there are also too many of those.) Bold are my top faves, headphones are things I read as audiobooks.

JAN

Less - Andrew Sean Greer

Shockingly funny book on a writer’s midlife gay crisis. I was a little mid on the end but the prose here was fantastic.

The Bullet Journal Method: Track the Past, Order the Present, Design the Future - Ryder Carroll

Beyond Bullets: Creative Journaling Ideas to Customize Your Personal Productivity System - Megan Rutell

Read about a million of these for a program; this was the only one worth recommending if you want to try journaling. (The official guide is Fine but it throws a lot at you at once.)

The 365 Bullet Guide: Organize Your Life Creatively, One Day at a Time - Zennor Compton

Lettering for Planners: A Step- - -Step Guide to Hand Lettering and Modern Calligraphy for Bullet Journals and Beyond - Jordan Truster and Jillian Reece

This should not have been a book.

Afterparties: Stories - Anthony Veasna So

I’ve been meaning to read this for years and years-- So was a friend of a friend-- and it was as excellent as I expected, and also made me tremendously sad that we won’t get more writing from him. 

Disfigured: On Fairy Tales, Disability, and Making Space - Amanda Leduc 🎧

This is theory for a general audience but I still wished it was more robust-- Leduc’s arguments had about the academic rigor of a tumblr post, which is a shame.

Aftermath: Life in the Fallout of the Third Reich, 1945–1955 - Harald Jähner 🎧

Nation-making and identity formation in the aftermath of fascism. There has been a lot of writing about the German project of the post-Nazi era, but this was a very solid read.

Water and Salt - Lena Khalaf Tuffaha

I came across Tuffaha’s gut-punch of a poem, “Running Orders,” online, and while the rest of the collection doesn’t always hit as hard, it’s still fantastic.

Bring Up the Bodies - Hilary Mantel 🎧

Reading this and The Mirror and the Light at the beginning of the year really ruined me for all other prose for the entirety of 2024, tbh. Nobody does it like Mantel.

Bandits, Misfits, and Superheroes: Whiteness and Its Borderlands in American Comics and Graphic Novels - Josef Benson and Doug Singsen

After reading Birds of Prey in October-December I really wanted to read some writing on whiteness in comics. This didn’t touch on what I was most interested in exploring and I did come away from the book thinking damn. None of that book was nearly as good as Tony Wei Ling’s fantastic piece on Crumb and alt-comics’ self-hagiography in SOLRAD.

Mending with Boro - Harumi Horiuchi

Make and Mend: Sashiko-Inspired Embroidery Projects to Customize and Repair Textiles and Decorate Your Home - Jessica Marquez

Mend!: A Refashioning Manual and Manifesto - Kate Sekules

Mending with Love: Creative Repairs for Your Favorite Things - Noriko Misumi

Mend It, Wear It, Love It!: Stitch Your Way to a Sustainable Wardrobe - Zoe Edwards

Can you tell I taught a visible mending class in February? Honestly any one of these are a good pick if you’re wanting to get into visible mending. This is the best for giving you a whole menu of techniques to choose from and having very accessible instructions.

Modern Mending - Erin Lewis-Fitzgerald

Mending Matters: Stitch, Patch, and Repair Your Favorite Denim & More - Katrina Rodabaugh

Creative Mending: Beautiful Darning, Patching and Stitching Techniques - Hikaru Noguchi

This is the best one for getting into the ethos of visible mending. It’s a deeply kind book.

Joyful Mending: Visible Repairs for the Perfectly Imperfect Things We Love! - Noriko Misumi

Visible Mending: A Modern Guide to Darning, Stitching and Patching the Clothes You Love - Arounna Khounnoraj

The Mirror and the Light - Hilary Mantel 🎧

Once again. Nobody is doing it like Hilary Mantel.

FEB

Finna - Nino Cipri 🎧

Anticapitalist multiverse Ikea relationship drama should have been my entire jam but this book was simply quite bad.

Weapons of Math Destruction: How Big Data Increases Inequality and Threatens Democracy - Cathy O’Neil 🎧

Are you ready to get depressed about data? This is a great book for your liberal mom. I could wish it were more anticarceral but for what it’s actually covering it does a great job.

Vegetables Love Flowers: Companion Planting for Beauty and Bounty - Lisa Mason Ziegler

Garden planning :) 

Flux - Jinwoo Chong 🎧

If you liked Severance (the show) or have ever projected some identity feelings onto a not-very-good TV show, this is a book for you. Imperfect pacing but still gripping, and I’m excited to see what Chong does next-- this is his first book.

Ocean’s Echo - Everina Maxwell

The premise of this book is simply so sexy. And overall the book is too!

The Imposition of Unnecessary Obstacles - Malka Older

Yayyyy Mossa and Pleiti return! I love this series and I loved this book.

A Land with a People: Palestinians and Jews Confront Zionism edited - Rosalind Pollack Petchesky, Esther Farmer, & Sarah Sills

I don't really have a write up for this. It's powerful and well written and I would recommend it.

Black Paper: Writing in a Dark Time - Teju Cole

Best book I read all year, frankly. Teju Cole writes about art and culture and being alive when the world is falling apart like nobody else.

MAR

The Deepest South of All: True Stories from Natchez, Mississippi - Richard Grant 🎧

Oh you hate to see a British guy get sucked in by white Southern niceness. (Richard Grant, in this case, is the British guy.) A lot of the stories in this were excellent but Grant gives way too much credit to folks clinging to the tattered remnants of the Old South.

Ottoman Brothers: Muslims, Christians, and Jews in Early Twentieth-Century Palestine - Michelle U. Campos

Excellent historical antidote to the idea of perpetual struggle in Palestine. Also interesting read just for looking at how citizens of Jerusalem were using national and imperial identities for their political agendas at the time.

An Immense World: How Animal Senses Reveal the Hidden Realms Around Us - Ed Yong 🎧

Lovely book that resists anthropomorphism and rendered me a font of “hey babe can I tell you a cool snake fact?” for about three weeks. 

The Barbizon: The Hotel That Set Women Free - Paulina Bren 🎧

You know I should have expected a book like this to be exactly what it was and yet. In addition to the sort of milquetoast stabs at feminism the structure is bad-- it devolves into Sylvia Plath’s life story and doesn’t really recover. I don’t mind reading a book about Sylvia Plath but I would like to plan to do that going in. 

The Hunter - Tana French

Only Tana can manage to write a book that is mostly just pretty normal conversations for 75% of its runtime and yet made me unbelievably stressed the whole time I was reading. Creeping dread! We love it.

Shades of Grey - Jasper Fforde

I last read this in high school when I was so excited to see that the sequel would be coming out any day now. Over a decade later, any day at last arrived! So it was time for a reread. The sexual politics of this book are insane, which I didn’t pick up on in 10th grade, but it is still an extremely clever and enjoyable book.

Rabid: A Cultural History of the World's Most Diabolical Virus - Bill Wasik 🎧

I learned a lot of fun facts in this book but it was rambling and also I do wish books like this would stop trying to overstate the importance of their topic. Rabies can’t be the source of vampire legends AND zombie legends AND werewolves. (Zombies in particular. We know where those come from and it ain’t rabies!)

The Transcriptionist - Amy Rowland 🎧

As a former transcriptionist the idea of a mystery that revolves around the intrinsic weirdness of being the fly on the wall was very appealing to me! This wasn’t quite the book I thought it was but I still enjoyed it. 

City Editor - Stanley Walker

If you can ignore the amount of name-dropping of people who were certainly famous in 1934 newsrooms but I have certainly never heard of, there are definitely some amusing anecdotes. Walker writes with a dynamism and bombast I would love to see in any kind of writing nowadays. However it is also a book written - a newspaperman in 1934 so it does hit every single -ism like it’s trying to get a pinball high score.

The Times: How the Newspaper of Record Survived Scandal, Scorn, and the Transformation of Journalism - Adam Nagourney 🎧

This book is exceedingly kind to the NYT and it was wild to read this the month that the Hamas mass rape story very publicly fell apart. However reading it did give me a very clear picture of how that story, and stories like it, happened in the first place. 

Chasing History: A Kid in the Newsroom - Carl Bernstein 🎧

Of all the “how do newspapers work?” books I read in March-April to prep for a fic I didn’t end up being able to write, this was my favorite. Bernstein is an engaging narrator and this answered my questions about how a story actually happens (particularly pre-internet.)

APR

Beacons in the Darkness: Hope and Transformation Among America's Community Newspapers - Dave Hoekstra

This ping-pongs between case studies in a way that would be totally fine in a feature story and is unforgivable in a book. But the case studies are interesting!

Newsroom Confidential: Lessons (and Worries) from an Ink-Stained Life - Margaret Sullivan

This is more memoir than NYT hagiography, and thus I enjoyed it much more.

Ocean’s Godori - Elaine Cho

I’ve got to stop reading SFF that came out this year. Unfortunately, it is part of my job to be aware of SFF that comes out this year. The pacing on this was UNBELIEVABLY sick-- the inciting plot incident only occurred halfway through the book, and the first 60 pages were us being fairly clumsily introduced to too many characters. The author’s end notes effusively thanked her editor and I think she should not have done that because a really solid editing job could have made this into something I really enjoyed. (People who work in publishing I’m sorry about publishing.)

Bombshell - Sarah MacLean

If your whole plot is going to hinge on a Deep Dark Secret, it better be deep and dark. 

Time's Echo: The Second World War, the Holocaust, and the Music of Remembrance - Jeremy Eichler 🎧

I got this for my grandma for Christmas and that was a mistake because this book is so depressing. If I had thought for two seconds I would have known this! However. I did like it! 

MAY

JUN

Desegregating Comics: Debating Blackness in the Golden Age of American Comics - Qiana Whitted

Really loved this one. 

Super Bodies: Comic Book Illustration, Artistic Styles, and Narrative Impact - Jeffrey A. Brown

This book would have been fantastic if the author had a) had any art historical or visual analysis training and b) done research about manga and the ways its styles have been used in the west. As neither of those were true this book mostly made me wish it was another, better book. Good comics recs though. 

Red Side Story - Jasper Fforde

Long-awaited sequel! This is an entirely solid book, though I wish I could have read it when I was a teen because it would have rocked my shit then. 

JULY

The Ladies Rewrite the Rules - Suzanne Allain

Really the only thing you need to know about this Regency #girlboss book is that at the very end of the book, which made almost no pretenses to historical accuracy wrt attitudes about gender roles, the main narrative tension is the love interest’s plans to go off with the East India Company to make his fortune. The other characters have no moral qualms about this; it’s proposed with the same air that a modern book would talk about someone going to college across the country. It made me feel completely insane. 

Escape Velocity - Victor Manibo

You know when you read a book and you say wow, I can’t wait to watch this as a Netflix special, but boy was it not very good as a book? That. Also I really wish we had spent more than about two scenes with the servants on the space hotel, so that I could care about them as people and not as plot devices!

Making Our Future: Visionary Folklore and Everyday Culture in Appalachia - Emily Hilliard

Engaging stories of modern West Virginia.

Belonging: A Culture of Place - bell hooks

The writing on exile in this did make me cry while I was eating lunch.

AUG

Appalachia on the Table: Representing Mountain Food and People - Erica Adams Locklear

More historical than I expected but solid writing on how perception of food affects perception of people.

What You Are Looking For is in the Library - Michiko Aoyama

I really didn’t expect this to get me but I am not immune to lovely, small-scale stories of people being kind to one another in community. Teared up on desk. 

SEPT

Watercolor Is for Everyone: Simple Lessons to Make Your Creative Practice a Daily Habit - Kateri Ewing

This was for a class and everyone liked the class! 

Hot Summer - Elle Everhart

I am so hit or miss on contemporary romance. This was a messy, delightful reality show romp. Light on drama, but the robust character relationships are the star of the show.

Loving Mountains, Loving Men - Jeff Mann

The poems here are generally better than the prose, which gets a bit repetitive at times. The poems are also generally very good, and a few of them made me cry. 

Second Night Stand - Karelia and Fay Stetz-Waters

I wish I had known going in that the authors were a married couple looking to tell “a story about a healthy queer romance.” All love to them, but I am simply not very interested in reading a story that bills itself that way! And as you might imagine there was a lot of therapy speak and very little narrative tension. Sex scenes were great, though, and if you want a very queer comfort read you might enjoy this. 

You Should Be So Lucky - Cat Sebastian

Very chewy character relationships. Sebastian manages to tell a story that feels of its time (1950s sports/journalism) while not being deeply bleak, which is a balance that many many queer historical romances completely bomb.

Lady Eve's Last Con - Rebecca Fraimow

Delightful lesbian screwball comedy. In space! 

OCT

Slippery Creatures - KJ Charles

The Sugared Game - KJ Charles

Subtle Blood - KJ Charles

Imagine if Lord Peter Wimsey had a passionate love affair with a gruff and tortured soldier recently back from WWI. That’s basically these books and I inhaled them. Shout out to detectorist for the rec!

The No-Show - Beth O’Leary 🎧

About 60% of the way through this book, I said, oh man, I hope that the twist to this book isn’t [redacted]. That would make me so mad. Well, it was, and it did! 

Drunk on All Your Strange New Words - Eddie Robson 🎧

Scratched the itch for sci-fi mystery, and the premise is fantastic. The narrator does a mostly excellent job but her American accents are distractingly bad, so if that will bother you read the book.

Deviant Hollers: Queering Appalachian Ecologies for a Sustainable Future edited - Zane McNeill and Rebecca Scott

Most of the essays in this are great! Every so often I get in my head about whether I can claim an Appalachian or Southern identity and whether I should do any writing on the subject. And then I read an essay that makes a lot of claims about “I centralize queer, trans, rural southern voices” and then does not proceed to actually demonstrate how they are doing any of that work, and go oh wait I’m actually fine. 

NOV

Better the Blood - Michael Bennett 🎧

A pretty solid thriller elevated by a very solid conceit: a Maori detective is investigating modern-day killings connected to a 19th century execution of a Maori chief by a group of British soldiers. This suffered a little from being written by a screenwriter who very clearly had certain shots in mind while writing (sometimes that works in prose, sometimes it doesn’t) and also from periodic intercut scenes from the killer’s POV (also a convention that works better in TV) which did undercut whodunit tension. Also the main character is a cop. But I ended up finding her sympathetic, which is a HUGE ask given the subject matter. 

The Stars Too Fondly - Emily Hamilton 🎧

Hated this. I tried to be measured in my initial review but every single part of this book was simply so bad. I wish I had those 11 hours of my life back. If this author is your friend I apologize, and also I hope she didn’t base a character on you, because every character in this book acts like a 15yo.  

Appalachian Reckoning: A Region Responds to Hillbilly Elegy edited by Meredith McCarroll & Anthony Harkins

I worked my way through my own booklist this fall and this was one of the best books on it. I kept trying to put it on display at the library but our copy was checked out the entire time. Give this to your uncle who won’t shut up about Ohio. 

The Pairing - Casey McQuiston 🎧

First half of this was way more compelling than I expected it to be, and then McQuiston makes the WILD choice to switch POVs entirely and permanently halfway through the book. And I found the second character pretentious and given to fits of purple prose (he describes the first character as a “superbloom” at one point and also won’t shut up about the most art history 101 pieces of art) so I did not particularly enjoy the book as a whole. I will give it points though for having a pretty non-cringey “hi i’m actually nonbinary” conversation, which is astonishingly rare.

Jonny Appleseed - Joshua Whitehead

This was initially a book club pick for a meeting that didn’t end up happening, which is a bummer because I would like to talk about this book with more people! A lot of lines in this are going to stick with me-- Whitehead shifts through time and place with deftness and grace. If you like K-Ming Chang’s Bestiary I think you will enjoy this-- Whitehead revels in the body in a similar way.  

I Heard Her Call My Name: A Memoir of Transition - Lucy Sante 🎧

If you’re not already a little familiar with the NYC art scene in the 70s and 80s you may not enjoy this, because Sante name-drops a lot. I am, and I loved it-- it’s a lovely meditation on growing old and hitting your breaking point. Sante is also a fantastic writer, and this is an excellent counterbalance to the particular type of trans writing that is very very common online. (Nothing wrong with that writing, but you need a balanced diet.)

The Village Library Demon-Hunting Society - CM Waggoner

I loved Waggoner’s previous books and I did end up enjoying this one a lot! It’s an enjoyable send-up of the cozy mystery genre.

Regarding the Pain of Others - Susan Sontag

A reread for my yaoi zine piece! Not only does this still hit but I think it’s a particularly apt piece of writing to be reading right now, when we are daily surrounded - images of suffering. Sontag, as ever, does not have any neat answers for us, but she does make you think more deeply about the world that surrounds you.

DEC

How to Tell When We Will Die: On Pain, Disability, and Doom - Johanna Hedva 🎧

I loved parts of this, and I hated other parts, which for me is a good sign about a book of theory. I have more thoughts about disability activism and being online that don’t fit into a quick write-up for a book. 

Ramp Hollow: The Ordeal of Appalachia - Stephen Stoll

This took me six months to read, but mostly because I was reading it occasionally on desk and I kept having to return the ebook. It demands a little bit more sustained attention than I was giving it! It’s an excellent overview of the history of land use in Appalachia through the 1930s and it gave me a lot of good context for the mountains I grew up under. 

The Forbidden Book - Sacha Lamb 🎧

Unfortunately, I think I would have liked this a lot more if I hadn’t read When The Angels Left the Old Country first! It’s a perfectly nice YA story-- but it definitely feels YA, and I don’t tend to enjoy reading a lot of YA.

Come Fly the World: The Jet-Age Story of the Women of Pan Am - Julia Cooke 🎧

I still don’t really know how I feel about this book. It does avoid some of the pitfalls of #girlboss nonfiction, but also it falls right into others. Mostly I wish it had engaged really at all with the people these women met on their travels, or like. Literally anyone Vietnamese. 

Exile and Pride: Disability, Queerness, and Liberation - Eli Clare

Oof ouch my bones!!! This hits on a lot and does it with incredible grace.

To Say Nothing of the Dog - Connie Willis🎧

I wish my grandma was still alive so I could recommend this to her, because she would have adored it. Delightful time travel Victoriana. 

The Message - Ta-Nehisi Coates 🎧

I really admire the move of making the entire second half of your highly anticipated book about the injustices you saw in Palestine, and I hope it pays off and every NPR listener who loved Between the World and Me picks this up and reads to the end. 

Everyone in this Room Will Someday Be Dead by Emily Austin

This book reads like a 200-page panic attack, which is not a diss! Really revels in the situational hilarity of anxiety/OCD/something unspecified.

Rules for Ghosting by Shelly Jay Shore

Okay I had to add this one in because I finished it after making my post. This book (contemporary queer Jewish romance with a bit of the supernatural) was so lovely and deeply felt and often laugh out loud funny. The family relationships are the real star although the romance is also very sweet.

[craftytomato]

I really liked your sonic AU from "phantom Rider" could you talk more about the AU if it's not a problem?

Sure thing! As long as you don't mind that I'm leaning into the Pretending to be Mind Controlled Idea instead of Actually Mind Controlled. Most of my ideas can work either way anyway.

(I wanna see how most of the actual arc plays out first in full before I go hard into my ideas but here's what I have so far based on the Phantom Rider's debut.)

The Idea:

Everything pretty much stays the same up until Surge uses her powers on Phantom Ryder, but instead she fully destabilizes his helmet and exposes Sonic to the world.

Everyone is shocked, scrambling to come up with an answer. Just before anyone can truly react, Eggman, who was watching from his base, gives a tired sigh because he had a feeling that something would go wrong. Now it was up to him to swoop in and keep their plan on track. He hacks into the jumbotron, scaring and/or confusing everyone.

"I see that my little present to this charity event has finally been unwrapped!"

He goes into a spiel about how he was interested in the event, 'hurt' that he didn't get an invite, and how he didn't appreciate the mockery to his likeness. So he decided to enter with a racer of his own with a little help from the dearly departed Starline.

Surge and Kit's blood runs cold. Eggman boasts that he had captured and mind controlled Sonic to be his champion racer. And now he was going to give this event some real challenge and excitement.

All eyes are now back on Sonic and he's torn right in half. He can't go along with this! He couldn't let Eggman scare everyone like this! But Tails and Amy needed the distraction. He had to stick to the plan, however derailed it was becoming. But-

"Some of you may be in disbelief that I was able to accomplish such a dastardly feat in such a short time. If you have any doubts, consider the alternative: my longtime nemesis willingly used my gear to disrupt a charity event? Doesn't sound like the blue rodent you've all come to sickeningly adore, now does it? No, of course not! Meaning that the only explanation is that Sonic is now my loyal minion whether he likes it or not!

Isn't that right, my Phantom Rider?"

Begrudgingly, Sonic makes his choice.

And he laughs. A hauntingly evil laugh that even impresses Eggman as it sends chills throughout the crowd.

"Glory to the Eggman Empire!"

Eggman cackles. "Enjoy your little race! I know I will!"

At that point, Sonic takes the chance to flee for the time being while everyone's distracted by Eggman.

Now the game has changed for everyone. The Diamond Cutters are torn. Lanolin and Duo want to stop the Phantom Rider at all costs while Tangle and Whisper are insisting on saving Sonic.

This also causes Clutch and Jewel to start to butt heads. Jewel wants to cancel the event for everyone's safety, but Clutch wants to carry it on. He gives reasons about how they'll have more security on standby for when the 'Phantom Ryder' makes another appearance and if they cancel the event then they're showing the world that they're scared of Eggman (in reality he just wants to use it to his advantage). Jewel pretends to buy it, but in her mind she's having other thoughts.

Surge and Kit are at a loss. Surge tries to play it off like Sonic deserves to know what it feels like to be in their place, but both her and Kit are being eaten up inside for multiple reasons. Surge wants to laugh and make fun of Sonic. This should be the perfect poetic justice for him in her eyes. But she can't and she hates that she can't!

Meanwhile Sonic is pretty sure that things can't get worse. Sure, Eggman saved the plan but now Sonic's essentially being blackmailed into following the mind controlled narrative.

Now what was supposed to be a simple plan gets more complicated by the minute as circumstances keep changing and more and more people are dragged into this mess.

And that's all I got so far

[strandnreyes]

thanks @nisbanisba @heartstringsduet @thisbuildinghasfeelings @carlossreaders @paperstorm !!

“The Ryders are hosting a game night this weekend.”

TK’s voice cuts above the rumbling of traffic outside. Carlos stays facing away, but he opens his eyes to stare at the dresser across from him. “Did we get invited or did you overhear that?”

“We were invited. Saturday at seven.”

Slowly, Carlos rolls over onto his back. He bunches the blankets up in his hands and he can feel TK staring at him. “We should go,” he says, because there’s no other option. They haven’t had too many group opportunities lately and though it’s what they should do, it’s what they’re here to do, Carlos has become attached to the quiet nights spent at home with TK.

He has work to do though. He knew TK was a distraction. He’s always known that.

“We haven’t been in their place yet,” TK reminds him, and Carlos finally looks over at him. There’s a mischievous glint in his eyes. “It would be a good time to snoop.”

“What do you want to snoop for?” he questions. Has there been something about them that he hasn’t picked up on yet?

“Nothing in particular.”

“Okay,” Carlos says slowly.

“This case is getting boring,” TK groans, and Carlos’ heart plummets. Here he is wishing to never leave and TK is counting down the days until it’s over.

“Oh.”

TK’s eyes widen briefly. “No, I mean… I’m having fun. More than I thought I would. This is so much better than drinking break room coffee and making rice-a-roni when I get home from the precinct at seven, but the case itself is so dry I’d think we were working over in the white collar division, not homicide.”

While Carlos’ heart rate returns to a normal pace, he has to consider that TK is right. “Yeah. We need to start making some headway.”

tagging @reyesstrand @rmd-writes @welcometololaland @whatsintheboxmh @tellmegoodbye @theghostofashton @ironheartwriter @orchidscript @lightningboltreader @liminalmemories21 @emsprovisions @freneticfloetry @alrightbuckaroo @chicgeekgirl89 @carlos-tk @carlos-in-glasses @basilsunrise @bonheur-cafe @butchreyes @mikibwrites @nancys-braids + open tag!!

[lowkeyrobin]

Fourth grade younger sibling reader who gets into a fight at school and basically goes straight to the skate shop because the reader needs their brother and is so upset and the gang all comfort him talking shit about the dudes that beat reader up!!

-♣️

YESYESYESYESYESYES DNNSNSS ilysm ♣️ u need to pop in my inbox more

FOURTHGRADE ; aneurysm

summary ; your older brother, a boy with little common sense, uses his final braincell for good

warnings ; language, censored racial slur, physical fighting

disclaimers ; reader & fg are siblings/sibling figures to each other (whichever you choose, it doesn't matter that much) ; reader calls fg Ryder (his real name as were gonna say) (they don't have canon names and I'm not making one up so I'm just using their actors names) ; reader is about rubens age (13/14 so like middle school ig)

track ; aneurysm, nirvana

word count ; 966

masterlist

You sprint down the sidewalk, dried blood still stained upon the top of your lip. Your throat is cold as you heave your chest up and down for air, your lungs begging you to stop running. You were in no kind of danger now, only infuriated and scared of what had happened to you.

Essentially, you got jumped while walking to your bus after school.

You ran as fast as your legs could take you, hoping that Ryder would be at Motorz with his other friends. If not, you had nowhere else to go.

You pull the front door open with much more force than needed and quickly look around as your brain pounds inside your head. Fuckshit is the first to lay eyes on you, which slightly widen as he looks you up and down.

"Damn n****! Fuck happened to you?" He asks, then turns to the corner where the two couches sit, "Yo, Fourthgrade, Y/n's looking for you"

You walk back to the corner behind the racks of shirts while Ryder's head pops up from his camera. His eyes clearly widen as he sees the blood trailing down your face, staining your grey shirt.

You look at him with crazed eyes, showing him fear and anger. He quickly stands up and stands over you as he tilts your head up to get a better look at your face, fingers resting under your chin.

"Shit, what happened?"

"I got jumped." You say with a flat tone, tossing your backpack down on the floor next to the box TV. You look back at the door, hoping not to see the kids who jumped you minutes earlier waiting for you outside. Thankfully, the coast was clear.

He drags you to the back and grabs a towel, soaking it with cool water. He hands it to you, instructing to wash off all the blood from your face while using the mirror above the sink. He leaves the room for a moment, grabbing some bandages, alcohol and cotton pads from the first-aid kit that sat next to the back door.

You toss the towel in the sink and sit on the ledge as you wait for him. You look at your left elbow, seeing it scraped and bleeding a bit from when you first hit the concrete.

He walks back in, his arms filled with first-aid supplies.

"Run that shit back, what do you mean got jumped walking to the bus?" Fuckshit says, flopping down on the couch in front of you.

You sit on the floor, your feet perched up on Fourthgrade's skateboard, sliding it side to side.

"These assholes have been picking on me for literally ever, and I made a comment in class that kinda referred to them being assholes. I was walking to the bus after school, and they just jumped me and shit." You shrug, head hung low. The bruise over your eye was becoming more apparent.

Fourthgrade shares a saddened look with the other boys, mostly Fuckshit and Ray, silently asking what he should do for you. They both shrug.

"Who- What do they look like?" The cinephiliac asks, fidgeting with the camera in his hand.

"You're not fighting a bunch of 14 year olds for me" You deadpan at him, your head tilted to the right a bit. "Forget it"

"Oh, I'm not fighting them for you" He shrugs, looking over to Ruben. "He will"

"Huh?"

"I will?"

You and Ruben quietly follow your bullies down the halls and outside the school at the end of school on Monday. You share a look while you hold Ryder's camera, keeping quiet as you spoke so they wouldn't hear you as you reach the exit doors.

"What else did they do to you?" Ruben asks, glancing at your bruised eye.

You shrug, "Y'know, subtle bullying shit. Making fun of me, talking shit about me, threatening to fight me, stuff like that"

He nods, turning as they do, catching the eyes of Ray, Fuckshit and Fourthgrade as they walk down toward the middle school, awaiting to meet up with you. Ruben shakes his head, nearly sighing.

"Why'd I fuckin' agree to this?"

You shrug again, "Your answer's as good 's mine"

You flick the camera on as he hands you his backpack, preparing to jump the three kids as the older teens follow close behind you, picking up the pace. You were still surprised that Fourthgrade, the boy who lacked common sense, came up with this whole plan. Ray definitely cleared up some confusion and deserved credit, but Fourthgrade was really the director of this film.

You look behind you at the three teens who nod, then Ruben quickly runs up to the third-wheel looking friend, pulling him in a chokehold. The other two don't notice for a moment until they hear their friend choking and gasping for air, his fingers clawing at Ruben's arm. You pull the camera up, filming as the Hispanic boy attacks the three bullies.

He releases the first from the chokehold, knowing the little ginger would run over helping his friends. The other two turn around and lunge at him as the older teens cheer him on. Ruben is able to put one kid in a headlock and use his free legs to his ability, kicking the other in the dick.

Behind the camera, you cheer him on as well, laughing as your bullies try to fight back. Surprisingly, he was really strong for some wannabe gangster fourteen year old.

"Beat his ass, bro!"

"Kick his balls again!"

"Get him, get him!"

"Go Ruben!"

You turn to look at Fourthgrade, his camera still recording. You send him a smile and mouth a thank you, which he nods in response, his lips curling into a smile as well.

"You're welcome"