#i mean its just insane and most people dont even know or realize or think about it

[pumpkinsy0]

Can we get head canons of the Shepard/ Curtis gang thanksgiving that Ponyboy and Curly would inevitably and accidentally make happen

cant b thankful for SHIT w these two, we need them away from everyone else

•i wanna talk about pony and curly as adults who moved in together so thats the papercut we get this post god damn it,,,they wanna celebrate w their family

•is this where i come out and say i dont think the shepard gang is AS familial as the curtis gang??? like they have their moments and some of the shepard gang is closer to the actual shepards than others, bit not ALL of the shepard gang is seen as a family, just like 3ish and when it comes to curlys own gang, into his adulthood hes only rlly cool w one of them so hes in there too

•ANYWAYS, usually they pick a family to visit, butthe plan WAS that curlys part of the family would come over, but then most of em called in to cancel, so pony just invited his gang over

•howeverrrrr curlys family schedule changed so they COULD visit, but curly literally just forgot to tell pony, even HE somehow forgot they were coming over, and when they showed up at the front door when the curtis gang was already inside u can bet how confused they were

•especially the curtis gang (yes including pony), cause they can handle the shepards being there, thats fine, not expected, but fine!!! however whoooo r these random ppl w em and do they know them??? did they sneak in here for food🤔🤔🤔

•a big reason y everyone is even there IS for food so THANKFULLY both gangs brought some food and for a while everything was alright, but half of the mfs here have a blackhole as a stomach so the food could rlly only go so far

•bc of curlys fuck up hes the one who has to keep going outside to get the food n stuff, minus a turkey tho bc pony and curly tried doing that thing where u deep fry a turkey but they nearly blew the whole block up so thats just out of the equation, yknow what was the main dish??? mac n cheese of course and tim was the one who made it, thank god cause pony was gonna whip out the velveeta 😩😩

•if theres one things white americans can cook, its pies, and pony was in charge of em, so u know that things gonna b sweet as hell AND he had to hit curlys, two, and sodas hand away from stealing a taste before it was done

•just realized this also means everyone would have to see the dirty joke variation of the “kiss the cook” apron curly bought, just ruining everyone appetite,,,i hate them both,,,

•no matter what age, curly and pony will always go on that walk where u knowwww these mfs r just out to get high, and half the gang r totally smokers, so when it happened more than half the people attending just randomly left

•the fight over left overs was insane, that one vid w that guy going “THATS MY PLATE” its like that

[itsmozzazzella]

the western diet is so fucked up dude like i know how and why it got like this but man it is just so so so bad for you

[nomairuins]

the difficulty of trying 2 explain to ppl that im Not being self deprecating or belittling my mental illnesses when i say something that could be perceived as overly critical towards myself but that thise things actually r true abt me. ppl did die.

[freakcliff]

x men tumblr dashboard simulator

bluebabadee

THIS BLOG IS A SAFE SPACE FOR NON-HUMAN PASSING MUTANTS. HUMAN PASSING MUTANTS DNI

10 notes 📌Pinned Post

sparklejays Follow

based on your likes!

every time I see a human talking about "how cool it would be to have superpowers" or some shit like that I loose it a little bit more. do these people realize that being a mutant isn't just fun powers. like even beyond the shit I deal with trying to get jobs or all the relationships that have been ruined once people realized I'm a mutant. abilities aren't just fun and games, I have a friend who can't touch people without nearly killing them, I burned down three buildings before someone finally taught me to control my abilities, and these people are all like "wouldn't it be great to fly to work every day??" just admit that you see us as comic book characters and not real people with real struggles

#actually mutant #jay .txt

276 notes

scamperpamperblog reblogged spocktism

🏙️tilleys-brain Follow

self diagnosing is great and all but most of you people aren't telepaths, you're just hyperempathic

#actually mutant #actually telepathic #hyperempathy #crosstagging i know but some of yall need to see this #tilley speaks #it can be dangerous to go around acting like you know peopels actual thoughts when its just your brain

1,657 notes

oh-you-pretty-things

.

#vent post #sometimes I get really mad at magneto #like I think he's done a lot for mutant rights and stuff #but I'm so fucking tired of everyone assuming that I'm evil just because of my powers #like jesus not all of us are trying to start atomic wars #some metallokinetics just use their abilities to make cool sculptures #but I can't get a spoon from across the room in front of strangers without someone mentioning jfk

3 notes

mutantbuffy reblogged muntantpollscentral

🩻mutantpollscentral

*physical mutation meaning something that is ALWAYS physical, not just something you can turn off and on whenever

#ig my mutation IS technically physical its just not visible to people most of the time so i feel weird claiming that #but like i was born with the tattoo marks #the powers didnt come till later tho #so idk which to pick

668 notes

sploimsh reblogged jesterjuleses

🎹pussy-truck-faggot

HEY! shout-out to people with *weird* mutations. Mutations that don't look cool, mutations that are gross, mutations that are dirty, mutations that you can't tell people about because they always cringe. You're just as valid as every other mutant out there. Your powers don't need to be palettable to humans for you to be treated with respect.

#THIS!!! #rb

5,678 notes

rosetvler

god i am so tired of the hypocrisy in this community. the double standards are insane. its okay to have 'scary' powers but the moment someone's abilities are scarier than like, pyrokinesis you're evil and dangerous to be around. 'acceptance' for you people only means nice mutants who've never hurt or scared anyone ever.

rosetvler reblogged rosetvler

non-mutants can reblog this btw

#srb #actually mutant #getting real tired of this

18 notes

katiedidnt reblogged morelikesexmen

🩻magicsteele27 Follow

okay like. i get that were all about acceptance and pride or w/e but no one in this tag has ever had friends irl i swear. if someone asks you not to read their mind you shouldnt. honestly you shouldnt be using telepathy on people at all without their permission. mutant abilities dont disclude you from respecting peoples boundaries

🌌rosetvler Mutuals

i swear to god you people are such hypocrites. its all 'mutant and proud' until someone has a power you dont like. its always about keeping the humans feeling comfortable instead of thinking about how it feels to never use your powers because theyre breaking 'boundaries' that were made up by humans in the first place

🩻magicsteele27 Follow

dude do you hear yourself right now

🎆jade-the-pyromancer Follow

Hey, I like your point op, but maybe you should stop trying to speak over actual telepaths and let them decide how to use their powers themselves???

🩻magicsteele27 Follow

i. i am a telepath.

#duddeeee telepaths are insane #used to be friends with one SO glad i broke that off before it went too bad

15,678 notes

[iznyangwoni]

EASY TO LOVE | chapter eight!

warnings: VERY suggestive, kind of smut but not really? mentions of being drunk

You dont even know what time it is when you’re so drunk you can barely hold yourself up. Wonyoung is the most sober one, and by most sober you mean that she can’t really walk straight, but she has enough strength to pull Moka off the floor. You girls are giggling like maniacs, and by this point you cant even remember why you started laughing.

You press your back on the wall, watching as Wonyoung struggles to help your other friend. You would help too if your head wasnt spinning so much. So you stand there, looking around. Nicholas is fast asleep on the couch, meanwhile Jay and Sunghoon are nowhere to be found. Jungwon is on the platform, talking with his friends.

Your eyes rest on him for a few more seconds, just a few.. His blazer was somehow even more open now, you could see the line of his chest, even his abs. You take a deep breath, thinking about the way his hand was touching your thigh not too long ago. The way his lips were whispering in your ear, your leg on his. Fuck.

Without even realizing you’re already walking towards him, your hand on his shoulder and he immediately turns to look at you. “Hey pretty. Feeling tired?” You look at his friends, at it takes them a quick glance to understand that they need to go, leaving you and Jungwon alone. “Worse..”

You say softly, your hand slowly coming down to his arm. You still dont get too close to him, you can see the lower floor by the inside platform, but that means that people from there can see you too. Your eyes once again fall to his chest and he lets out a quiet chuckle, your hand moves on its own, touching his necklace before going just a bit down on his chest.

“I thought you weren’t interested in sleeping with me?” You raise your head to glance at him, your hand not moving from that place. “I wasn’t looking for it… but if the right time comes…” “is this the right time?” “is it not?” Jungwon has to beg his whole body to not just lean in and kiss you as if its the only thing he wanted. The way you’re looking at him, its driving him mad.

“Follow me.” You say, and he just nods, following you wherever you want, the only thing on his mind being how your lips would taste on his, how your soft skin would feel under his big hands, how much he needed to be inside you. He groans when you close the door of a random room, the lighting is so dark and blue, he could see you perfectly, but it was good enough to get him in the mood.

He doesnt think twice before pushing your back towards the wall, his body so close to yours, his hands on your waist, slowly going up and down to caress your sides. “You’ve been playing with me for days..” He whispers, biting your ear as he starts giving open mouthed kisses to your neck, you close your eyes, letting him do whatever he wants with you.

“Do you think its fair?” He bites your skin, his hands gripping even more on your hips, meanwhile yours unbutton his blazer completely. “Telling me not to get hard while you look like this..” His jacket falls on the floor with a loud thud, you open your eyes only to look at him, your hands going all around his upper body, his broad shoulders, toned chest, muscled arms.

You cant help but whine when he grabs your ass, you didnt think he could make you get so wet only by these touches. “You better shut that mouth and just kiss me before i go insane.” You dont even have to finish the sentence for his lips to be on yours, they taste even better than you would’ve thought, he’s not too rough, but he still gives you the feeling that he wants to devour you.

Your hands go between his hair, fingers wrapping with his locks as you bring him down to kiss you better, his tongue interlocking with yours, pants and groans leaving both of your mouths. You make out for a while, until your hear the announcement that the club is about to close. Fuck, is it already so late?

Jungwon pulls out of your lips, a string of saliva still keeping you attached. “Should we..?” “No.” You dont want to stop, you still have thirty minutes, you know you can make the best out of them. “We.. still got time..” You breathe out, your lips attacking his neck and chest, your hands going to his pants. He moans, and god, you didnt believe he could be so loud, but you have to admit its only turning you on even more.

The announcement goes on again and he stops your hands, you whine, too drunk to really understand how risky this is. He kisses your cheek before taking a step back. “I guess it wasnt the right time, pretty.” You watch him as he takes his blazer from the floor and puts it on, you pout, biting your bottom lip nervously.

He buttons up only one of the buttons and you pout even more, how can he be so hot even after rejecting you so casually? He takes your hand in his and brings you out of the room, your boots have been hurting like hell for hours now, you can barely walk down the stairs.

You finally reach your friends, who are standing in the parking lot, trying to figure out who should drive and who shouldn’t. “There you are!” Wonyoung pinches your cheek, and you close your eyes, too drunk and tired to even complain. “Y/n are you okay? You sure you can go home like that?” She then asks, holding your face in her hands, you just mumble.

Honestly, no. You cant go home like this, if the cameras were to catch you all stumbling around your house you’d be done for, and no other people can enter after midnight, so going back is not an option. “Its fine, she can stay with me.” Jungwon is the one to speak and you raise your head to look at him, only to then rest your forehead on his shoulder.

“Yeah, no she wont.” “Sunghoon-“ “We don’t know him!” You’ve never seen Sunghoon so mad. You know he cares for you a lot, but he never really acted like this. “I’ll go with Jungwon.” You manage to say, the latter puts his arm around your waist, not wanting you to fall by any chances.

Sunghoon is about to say something but Wonyoung, whos the only other one able to actually think, speaks. “It is better for her to go with him, Hoon your parents are still home and you dont want to repeat what happened to her last year, do you?” At that point the older guy just stays silent, the answer being obvious.

Wonyoung then looks at Jungwon with the coldest glance she can provide, her hands on your head. “I’ll tell her brother she’s sleeping at my house. You better not touch her, understood?” “Who do you guys take me for? I’m not touching her when she’s so drunk.” You pout even more, damn you really had hope for something to happen.

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TAGLIST @unhakki @firstclassjaylee @en-verse @mxxninthesky @seunghancore @erenmyman @jiamini @yoonzns @wonswondrland @50-husbands @leaderwonim @aloloveswonie @f3rraribabez @jwonistic @ribbioniki @kyanmeai @ilovejungwonandhaechan @nat123c @yjwsgf

[aftonfamilyvalues]

how women on here are reacting to the boxing situation is the final straw for me with radblr tbh.

like imagine this scenario for a second: people are making false claims about you that you not only can easily disprove with a simple, uninvasive test, but you've ALREADY DONE said test in the past so you'd just need to ask them to publish the results. you can debunk these claims with the same amount of effort required to push a button.

but you don't. you have Literally The Easiest Option In The World to prove you're right and you don't do it.

and yet because women have created their own OC for this guy in their heads who is a female with androgen issues they'd rather defend their self-made blorbo as a way to peacock about how "yes all women" and/or "not racist" they are than do 2 seconds of research and critical thinking to realize "hey maybe this situation that fits literally all the criteria for the dude being a male, including the fact that he's been previously disqualified from competing in the women's league TWICE yet shows up for the Female Olympics anyway, means he's actually just a liar and cheater"

i'm open to having some sympathy for him if his parents (tried to*) raise him as a girl but like. he's a fucking adult. he took a sex test. he knows who he is now. he's making his own decisions. one of these decisions is choosing to hide who he is.

*idc how misogynistic his parents are in believing "no vagina??? but no penis. no penis = female. because female = non-male.", if they knew he had a male-specific dsd that coloured how they raised and treated him, even if they tried to hide it. the act itself of hiding it from him and trying not to raise him that way makes their treatment of him already inherently different from how they'd raise him if he were actually female.

link here

im going to try to go about this in the most respectful way possible.

i cant say i agree with everything youre saying here. theres still a lot of misinformation about this and i cant say a slatz tweet is very satisfying for me given the racist and homophobic things ive seen from her. but, if what you say is true, that this boxer is an intersex male who was assigned female at birth, i think its completely unfair to treat her entirely as a man. the community tends to regard itself as a place for intersex women too, those with this particular dsd were not spared misogyny just because they unknowingly had xy chromosomes. learning they are biologically male with a dsd doesnt mean they have a desire to completely restructure their lives and identity around being men, i think thats kind of insane to expect.

that being said, i think there needs to be a reevaluation of fairness in sports and how intersex people fall into it. what advantages or disadvantages do intersex women carrying a y chromosome have over those that dont? what male charactistics (bone density, for example) still exist in these women? do they pose a danger to other women in their sport? what about other intersex conditions? at what point does it become unfair? unfortunately it could lead to their exclusion, and if that happens will there be another place for them? theres a lot to consider and things will have to change as we learn more. its not really a black and white situation in my opinion.

[ojbrush]

hfjONE spoilers ahead !!! dont read if you havent really seen the show

heres a Link to the show if you are interested, its really good! and i reccommend watching it :3 and with that, allow me to ramble. Canonically, Airy views Liam as a friend. Being desensitized and isolated from communication with others for more than 13 years fucked up his perception of people, meaning he thinks of Liam's actions toward him as friendly, as that's basically all he's ever gotten since. Hostility. He views Liams hostility and yelling and aggressiveness and attempted murder on him as signs of friendship. He doesnt realize Liam doesnt like him whatsoever. He doesnt realize that that isnt what friends do. Friends don't try and kill you, friends dont attack you with only hatred just oozing out of every word they say, every action they take. But he doesnt realize that, and which results in him helping Liam even after his attempt at murdering the guy. Regardless of the way Liam treats him, he still helped Liam by giving him a cast for his broken leg, and giving him bedding.

Airy even gave this guy crutches as well, just like before when he broke his leg. Hes mentally unwell, hes apathetic and doesnt seem to care about most things from being isolated and desensitized to everything. Disassociating when Liam yells at him, derealizing CONSTANTLY. People in the fandom view him as a heartless monster whos deranged and only wants to spread pain and suffering, which is also LIAMS view on him. But thats not true.

(as Liam yells at him, he just stares blankly. No real reaction and movement during the time Liam's voice is raised. He finally responds once Liam says "end this, now." with a bunch of apparent hesitance.) Hes just a guy in a world where theres absolutely nobody but him, isolated from contact with other people, desensitized and forgetting who he even was before. He doesnt realize his actions are wrong, and he doesnt realize that when people are being hostile toward him, they do not like him. He does realizes people were scared, he said it himself. "Once they were on the planet, they all seemed pretty scared, so..." (as said in ONE 17: You move, I send.) He doesn't completely ignore peoples emotions, and tries to make it better for them. But he doesn't realize the way he's doing it is wrong. incorrect, a bad way to fix things. Besides, after creating ONE, the contestants were nothing BUT hostile toward him; so he doesn't know anything else. That's all h'es EVER known. Of course it is warranted, and he very much deserves the hostility. Kidnapping people and keeping them to compete in his gameshow against their wills, but he's more than that. What he did was wrong, insanely wrong, but he didn't know that. It doesn't excuse his actions, but it sure as hell explains them. Airy isn't an insane, deranged kidnapper. He's just a guy who's been isolated for too long, and doesn't understand the difference from right and wrong, and he doesn't understand basic human emotions other than his own. Lack of empathy, if you will.

It's just a sad case of isolation and a slowly deteriorating mental state in which results in the suffering of others due to someone (Airy, in this case) slowly becoming someone they dont even recognise themself.

After all, i bet this man doesn't even remember his own name. this was just a senseless ramble i am so incredbily unmotivated for art right now so take me and my insane rambles </3

[d0v3uae]

okay, i was just rewatching season 4, and i realized something, remember this scene in the airport right in the beginning of the series? Mike says “i handpicked those for you in Hawkins” most likely he got those from the field that we also saw in the end of this season, and the one of the very first scenes in season 3. now, i was watching the very last episode, and the very last scene, and i noticed when el was walking forward, she picked up dead flowers, specifically the same colors Mike got her as a gift back in the beginning (yellow and purple). this means the fall/deadness of their relationship, because as we already know, they are NOT on good terms. i mean i really tried to like their ship, but i just cant see it without being toxic, and having communication issues for example: El felt the need to lie about her life and Lenora, and how she had friends, and everything was good. why would she need to lie? shouldnt they trust each other and tell each other things like this? And back in the beginning when Mike tells Lucas that they dont want to be popular, and the airport scene when El says that she wants burritos for breakfast, Mike says something like “really? no i mean i trust you,” that scene to me meant that Mike was very awkward, and not acting like himself. and not to mention but Mikes outfit was not himself AT ALL. Argyle says “oh no its a shitty knockoff,” meaning again, that mike is acting like someone hes not in front of his girlfriend.

now, i wanna talk about the roller rink incident, because there is a LOT more stuff going on then what it seems. so basically Mike and Will are fighting while trying to find El, and Will says “well what about us?” and Will DID NOT mean this romantically, but Mike took this romantically?! Will meant it as “Ok i get it, you have a girlfriend, but what about our friendship?” Mike took it as romantic, which is why he said “We’re friend! We’re friends!” and the fact that he said it two times is also insane, and his tone of voice when he said it was so tense almost. when people in other shows/movies say they are just friends, they most if the time end up as an endgame couple. for example: the office, Jim and Pam, they both had crushes on each other throughout the first seasons, but oh look they were an endgame couple, and even got married. what im trying to say is, Mike took it romantically, when Will didnt.

And another thing with this fight, is that as soon as Mike said “We’re friends” the song “in the closet” started playing, and some people think “oh its because Els in a closet” which yes, in a way, but it was an employee’s shed. and also this song started playing RIGHT AFTER Mike assured that they were “just friends” little sketchy right? And i also just wanted to point out that after Mike said that, he saw Wills face and immediately knew he made him sad, and we can see the tension in his face almost disappeared.

now right after the skate incident, El, Mike and Will were all standing there in a triangle if i may point out, but anyways, we can see Will reacted normally, he said “oh my god..” but Mike reacted very aggressively towards it. and the camera pans over to El sitting alone at a table, and Mike and Will are right next to each other. really quickly, i wanna point a few things out. when angela takes el onto the rink, we can see Mike not care, hes just like “meh” but Will knows, so he stands up and says “oh no” which directly after he says that, he stands up so quickly, but this is weird for me. because Mike can sense when something is wrong with Will, but not El. because we see that when angela comes over to the table they are sitting at, it is very tense but Mike doesnt really notice, but Mike notices when something is wrong with Will almost IMMEDIATELY. and this is proven back in s2. so Will is closing his locker and Mike says something like “come on” and Will looks worried or even tense, and Mike immediately notices, because he says “what” many times and not to mention in his soft voice that he only uses for Will. so i think this means Mike understands Will and Will understands Mike.

i think this might be foreshadowing to the break up to Mike and El in season 5. so, once again. BYLER ENDGAME!!

[mullettaegi]

i know the galra had ten thousand years and unlimited resources to build up their defences and offences, to create an insane amount of weapons, to do evil experiments, and rule far across the universe, but HOW does it go from voltron being the defender of the universe, the most powerful weapon in the universe, something that zarkon has been hunting after for ten thousand years, something that made sendak (a very strong galra commander who would not let anyone stand in his way, according to himself) gasp and RUN.

yes he didnt fully run away but he retreated; he watched his battle cruiser get blown to fucking pieces, and remember this is the first time the paladins formed voltron. there was no sword. it was like their second or third time flying in their lions, and the only one that has had consistent flight simulations and training for however long is lance, and even then i think we saw him struggle to strategise a battle plan when going after the yellow lion with hunk because we heard him say he would cover hunk, we saw him carry that out but then get overwhelmed by the galra fighters in the air and take off after them.

hes a damn good pilot, and they all are, especially in the lions, but this is on a next level to what they could've been training for at the garrison.

so, this takes me to my point, why in the fucking world was voltron so fucking nerfed in the later seasons. like yes i dont want an easy win for voltron every battle, yknow, its about them working together as a team, its about voltron not always being the solution (aka when its better for them to split off into lions while they strategise), its about them actually coming up with strategies instead of just going in voltron first and hoping for the best.

its been a while since i watched the later seasons but rn im mostly thinking of atlas. like it just doesnt really make sense to me tbh? to build the atlas, yes, its essentially a replacement for the castleship, a place for a team to watch voltron from the sky, provide back up, but then to have it form into a voltron-esque robot ??? i just dont think thats where they should have taken it.

im glad for the castle of lions to take an important role in some episodes, where again the answer lies outside of JUST voltron, but it doesnt really make sense to build another giant robot.

it kind of takes away the development the paladins are supposed to go through as well, to work together better and stronger as a team thus opening up more weapons from voltron and learning how to fight in different ways.

idk i think the entire thing was kinda over-thought at the end as they were trying to keep the show going, but missing some of the other storylines they could've gone down, (black paladin lance, lotor redemption arc (which he did seemingly have but all along they planned to throw that in the bin), the team coming together as friends more often developing their bond as voltron but also as people, the team seeing their families again, not killing off shiro's FUCKING CANON BOYFRIEND IN A STUPID FUCKING SHITTY WAY ADAM DIDNT DESERVE TO DIE YALL ARE JUST COWARDS, and also the team kinda reflecting back to how they were jn the beginning and realizing they have grown (i say the team but i mostly mean lance and hunk because the writers just did not give two shits about them they really didnt get the chance to become fully thought out characters, they just had some insecurities and interests that were ignored until convenient then ignored again)).

[diosakuu]

cw: antis being stupid; suicide mention;

girl. that's it i'm going insane i'm going EXTREMELY INSANE.

"proship is a term for people who enjoy and support ships that involve pedophilia, incest and abusive relationships" where did you even get this meaning. please think for a second, in which meaning PRO would mean PROBLEMATIC. like please tell me. pro means you're in favor of something, why would pro-ship and pro-fiction be an exception? in your logic, terms such as pro-choice, for example, would mean problematic choice. or pro-feminism would be problematic feminism. did you realize how dumb it sounds? i hope so. pro-ship means you're in favor of shipping, it means you won't harrass/judge/bully others for something a dumb as a silly fictional couple in internet. "even problematic ones?!" yes, even problematic ones. because it's FICTION. people can differ fiction from reality, it's not that hard. also, if you think everything in fiction should be "moral" and have morals being spoon-fed to you, i don't think you should he in tumblr. i don't think you should be in internet actually. please just go back to your homework or go watch some kids cartoons like Bluey or My Little Pony, because if fiction really affects reality (IT DOES), i don't think you'd be so mean since... kids cartoons teach you about moral values like... not bullying others, but it seems fiction haven't affected you in this aspect.

"did your parents not give you enough love and attention? don't worry i can tell!! ❤️" actually i think the one who haven't received enough parental love was you, i only THINK SO. you know there are various studies about people like you bullying/being mean to others because, most of the time they: have low self-esteem and also dont receive much attention from others. for example we can cite this article. also:

this screenshot it's from the same article i linked and its the first thing that appears when you search why are bullies so mean.

and oh my god! the last line... ohh yes, saying proshippers (who are also human) should end their lives is SOOOO moral of you! girl. listen, you're probably some random pissed kid, and you should understand that: if you hate someone, think someone is "bad", telling them to end themselves DOESN'T MAKE YOU ANY BETTER THAN THEM.

i hope antis can be smarter someday 🙏 and to any proshipper who read the post from that anti: please don't listen to them and stay proud shipping :)

edit: i received an ask saying that anti admitted that was just ragebait. well i'm still leaving this here, i took a good time reading, and i hope more antis can come across this, take a read, and think on their actions.

[wewerebornsextuplets]

what would kenny say if he could see his family now? would he be happy at how far his daughter has come? would he feel pity for his wife, seeing how grief has changed her? would he still wish for his family to be together? (<- insane)

this ask is absolutely diabolical. i cannot thank you enough for giving me a chance to talk about kenny more in-depth. unfortunately most of this ended up being context for how he thinks + a bit of further exposition on mayumis relationship with her parents [since family is a big deal to kenny and well. yknow], so the actual answers are a bit further down but i hope this is still at least a little illuminating 👼

one thing thats important to know about kenny for this to make sense, is that he has some very strong values and beliefs surrounding the idea of family. while i wouldnt exactly describe these ideals as him being "family-oriented" in the traditional sense, its more like... okay. you know how older people, usually in their 50s and 60s, all seem to be capable of talking at length about That One Relative they despise, how they wish they could have nothing to do with them, because nothing good ever comes of it, but then they end their diatribe by going "well, they're still family, so i love them"? kenny's like that, hes committed to family to a fault. obviously there are still things that he would consider as going "too far" or irreconcilable when it comes tothis, but his tolerance for that is much higher than it probably should be.

to this point, i think even when he was still alive, he could tell that tears were beginning to form in the family dynamic that weren't solely caused by his inevitable passing. its not something ive discussed much here, but mayumi actually wasnt on very good terms with her parents before kenny got sick; she left home and started her career as a gravure model when she was 20 as a means of "sticking it" to her parents' more traditional wishes, and she was unhappy when she was living with them, but never actually did the work to figure out What was so wrong with the situation. as such, when kiru was born some years later, and she started to settle into life with kenny, she began to recontextualize her dissatisfaction with her parents' treatment of her as her just being a bratty teen. so, when kenny got sick, and she decided their best bet financially would be to move in with them, kenny agreed, though he viewed it as something of a necessary annoyance because hey, they're family.

even still, in the last year or so before he passed, the effects of living in the family home again paired with the inevitable realization that kenny was Definitely Gonna Die were becoming more and more apparent, primarily through how mayumi acted towards him and to kiru. he could tell she wasnt taking the process lightly at all, but part of him hoped that after his passing, she would be able to move on and mayumi, kiru, and her parents would be able to continue on as a family unit without him. he thought the bitterness between them and the cycle of mistreatment was just something theyd have to "work through" or "get over" because theyre Supposed to be close, though i dont think he ever said his out loud.

so, i think if kenny were to see the family structure now with full context, he would be pretty upset and confused that things didnt go quite as he'd hoped. i dont think he would blame them for going no-contact after the incident at christmas, but he would certainly be unhappy with the fact that things reached that point in the first place. there's a lot that he wished could have happened differently [esp. once kiru became an adult and left to live on her own, as well as some of the decisions made in the months following his death], though he was quite even-tempered + logical when need be, so i dont think he would really be able to find it in him to stay angry at either party for very long [though he'd certainly be mad about the concussion. physical harm is one of the aforementioned "okay even i think this is too much" bars for him wrt familial conflict, even though mayumi herself was also very freaked out by herself in this instance]

with mayumi as a person, more than anything i think he would just be very sad about her resignation to a life of isolation now that he's gone; he'd hoped that theyd be able to "get over" their differences and become closer now that circumstances were easier for them with him gone. but again, i dont think kenny really understood the full breadth of the emotional abuse mayumi endured, especially since mayumi herself never really came to grips with it. and having never endured that himself, he isnt able to wrap his head around the fact that its the sort of thing there isnt ever any "getting over". its a very naive take on family conflict, borne out of his own inability to really understand incompatibility in this sense + familial abuse due to his lack of experience with it. this same confusion and upset also applies to how things shook out with mayumi and kiru, though i think he was more understanding in this case since there was a physical aspect to it. but past that he just wishes mayumi could find it in herself to move on and meet new people, that she might be able to be happy again in spite of all of this. its a strange mix of pity, confusion and a tinge of anger.

as for kiru though... theres no question that kenny would be immensely proud of the person she is today. to put things into perspective here, he was born and raised on chichijima, and sickness aside, only ever left for long periods of time when he was attending college. he regards this as being the most difficult thing he ever had to do, and its a decision HE made! so for kiru, who went through so much more than that and made the move at a much younger age than him, to STILL come out on top with a doctorate and a nice job? that on its own is enough of a feat in his eyes. but past that i think he would also be very proud of the kind of person she is, since she really is just such a sweetheart and is incredibly level-headed. he'd be very very happy that she managed to do so well for herself even after all that went on, and that she managed to find such a wonderful group of friends who love her [joblessness aside. though i dont think he'd really gaf if we're being honest]... and furthermore i can see him really liking her and keiko as a couple HEHE

furthermore, i imagine kenny would be pretty happy that kiru at least stayed in contact with SOME family on her mom's side, since again, hes still quite family oriented in a strange roundabout way. he would definitely be confused as to why it was yanagida of all people, since they didnt visit one another very frequently before the move and always seemed to be bickering with each other After they moved, but hes happy nonetheless

[utahlive]

im sorry utah nation. I played videos game instead of working on an episode,, orz

on an unrelated note, I wanted to ask: does anyone have any tumblr themes or ways to make posts chronological? We have roughly 150 episodes of UtahLIVE, and although most of them can be read out of order, there is a timeline (plus it would be more convenient for new readers. Ive gotten a lot of asks about topics or scenarios that have already been answered). If there are any tutorials/themes/tips let me know via DMs or ask box!

additionally:

LETS GOOOOO!!! This is insane! 4000 people... thats roughly twice the size of the student body at my school. I dont know how many of you guys are porn bots, but im still going to take this W. I feel like I should do something special? People usually do community events for milestones I think so if you have ideas let me know?? Otherwise I’ll have something fun to post in the next week.

+ some quick q&a below

avoiding potential lawsuits 🙏

I know this one is meant for Wilbur, but alas thats just how I draw eyes. Sorry my art style gave your fave character cataracts. yeah its permanent. no sorry we cant fix it. um. insurance doesnt cover the surgery so hes like that forever. yeah. sorry

(i do like to mess with how I draw eyes, but the white color is a stylistic choice)

its a psycho-competitive relationship that can be construed to be romantic (but it's not explicit). obviously

anon im holding your hand so tenderly and lovingly. it means a lot that people like my art! more than I can say, which is why ive been trying to figure out how to answer this ask for the past like... two+ weeks since you sent it in! Im probably gonna hold off on sharing my other accounts for a few reasons (there might be some people who already know my other blogs which is fine idc welcome to my twisted mind etc im just not going to advertise them here). My main blog is basically a spam blog where I dont tag anything. I dont really post original art and my fandom art is few and far between. 90% of my work just goes in discord DMs or servers 💀 I think the main reason though-and this may or may not make sense to some of you-is that I don’t want your opinion of me to change how you view the story. This is a super specific example, but for all my fic readers out there: have you ever joined an authors server, and then after meeting them you feel a bit odd about the fic since the creator isnt exactly the person you thought them to be (not necessarily in a good or bad way)? That’s exactly what I don’t want happening with this blog. Basically: Nooo what if you find out about me as a person and realize im cringeeee aaaaa [image of the werewolf transformation (you know the one)] That being said, we’ll see how things go, I guess! At the very least, I’ll probably put my socials out when I’m done here (we got a ways to go before that happens though, so dont even start to worry about that) that was a lot of text for one answer. yeesh 😬 sorry about that

[bl4z33467]

The Vulpixen Cannon 2

Part one^^^^^

A couple years pass. Novos trains harder than he ever had, knowing the atrocities he committed, desiring for no one to know what he has done. He believes the stronger he gets, the less likely people will know of his attractions. He tries to put on muscle, but fails due to his poor diet. Ceaser, learning from his mistakes with Altilis, makes sure that his protege, Novos, doesn't end up overweight and unwilling like Altilis. So, he makes sure he is on a strict diet, keeping him underweight (i swear this is a plot point guys). In the meantime, Altilis had been growing more mature. He began to be able to accept himself and realize the importance of his role in the legion. He became content with not becoming the next Kaiser.

Then it happens. Caesar is found dead. The tumor won. A large ceremony is held as Vulpes Novos Inculta is deemed the new Kaiser. His first act, he makes Altilis his advisor. For the next few years, the clones nearly double the legion's territory. During these years, Altilis's population grows, people begin respecting him more for his flawless battle plans and knowledge of terrains. One very interesting thing with Novos being the kaiser, he no longer has someone telling him what to do, particularly what to eat. This is a detriment to him, as he no longer was constantly on the battlefield and had whatever he wanted to eat at his disposal for the first time in his life, he began to get fatter. At first, it was good as he was sickly skinny. After a while though, legionaries began confusing the twins. This didn't bother Altilis but miffed Novos. Instead of changing his horrible diet, he trims his lovely blond curls and dyes it brown. Along with this, he gets more elaborate robes, having lots of pelts, feathers and gold accents. This only helped partially, as more and more legionaries began commenting to him that he reminded him of Altilis. He began to get more angry about this. They're saying he looks like him, acts like him, IS HIM? No! He wanted to be LIKE him, not him! novos needed to change this. But how. He was too stubborn to change his own ways, so he had to get rid of the problem itself: Altilis.

"Why do I have him around anyways" Novos thought, "The legion is doing just fine with me leading them."

Novos fails to recognize how much Altilis does to help the legion.

"I can't just, banish him. i mean, hell i could but that would damage my reputation to the legionaries" Novos begins to ponder. What can make him able to send him away. He wonders around fortification hill, studying all the various Tents buildings and other things. He spots it. A medium sized, shottily thrown together building. Altilis Library. His brother had been an avid scholar his whole life, collecting books of all sorts and maps too. A wealth of knowledge extremely valuable to the legion, that he let any legionary come and use. Novos chuckles lightly to himself, cocking his head. "Would be a shame if something happened to it" he says under his breath. He glides over to the building, and walks in. Altilis is there, nose in a book as usual.

"Hello Kaiser Novos" he says in a neutral tone, without looking up.

Novos doesn't respond but walks over to the desk Altilis sat at.

"I dont see you here often on your own acord" Altilis says while flipping a page in his book, "anything in particular you want? A map, im guessing?"

"Not this time. I was wondering, how do you keep this place bright even if its walled off?" Novos inquires.

Altilis looks up from his book finally. He looks at Novos dead in the eyes. "Candlelight....? Like we do in most areas??"

Novos smiles faintly "Thats what i thought." (He turns to leave before pausing. "Do you think you can do something for me?"

"Anything you wish, Kaiser Novos" Altilis says. Despite being Novos being Altilis's younger brother, Altilis still had great respect for Novos.

"I need you to gather me more intel of the terrain up north. As soon as possible, and as much as possible. Okay?"

Altilis nods. "Yes Kaiser" he says while putting his book down and goes off to grab an atlas.

"I need it soon and fast, so you will stay up until you've given me sufficient material" Novos said gruffly.

"Kaiser Novos, I will need to sleep soon, it has already been a long day for me and-"

Novos lifts his hand, shushing him.

"Yes, Kaiser Novos. My apologies" Altilis says. The scholar began to compile stacks upon stacks of information on the north as fast as he could. It drained the life out of him to stay up all that night and the next day before Novos waltz back into the Altilis's Library in the evening.

"Hows that information coming" Novos says with a hint of smugness.

Altilis, weary from his lack of sleep and studies, coughs up an answer. "Its been real tough, some of these areas seemed even uncharted before the war-"

"YOU LAZY BASTARD" Novos screamed, slamming his fist on the table. The candle, which was nearly burned down, wobbled. He slowly moves his head over to it and smirks, then looks back to Altilis. He whispers "No one is going to believe you." Altilis's weary eyes go shot. Novos bats the candle off the table. Altilis takes a moment before trying to put it out, but Novos had pounced on him, pinning him down. Altilis would have usually overpowered him, but his exhaustion made the effort futile.

"Novos! Brother! Why are you doing this?!? What have I done to deserve this??" Altilis cried.

"They were thinking i was you." Novos sneered.

"We have the same genetics! Of course they would, we are basically twins!" Altilis proclaimed.

Novos furrows his brow. "Not that, Altilis. They thought I ACTED like you, and you acted like ME. They were challenging my authority by insinuating that we are one in the same." The flames began to leap higher around the men.

"We aren't. You know we aren't. I know we aren't. I don't want to take your place, Novos!" Altilis said, beginning to squirm as the heat was getting to him.

Novos loosened his grip on his older clone. "I know you dont, but I want no questions about who's running the show. I can do this without you." A book shelf toppled under its own weight from the fire eating the wood below. A bunch of books topple onto the ground near them. They both look over and see a tattered old book. The title read "Canids." Both remember that night, oh some 15 years ago.

"But you- you said" Altilis said, confusion and fear in his eyes.

"I was a STUPID child!" Novos barked, If i woulf have known what was to come, I should have never given you that book." Novos gets up, and lets Altilis get up. Novos shoves him, causing the still exhausted altilis to stumble as novos dashes out of the flaming building. Altilis makes it out soon after.

The next day dawns. The library, where nearly all of the legion's books and other important paper records where held, was burned to the ground. Novos sat in on his perch atop of Fortification hill as he called out. "Fellow legionaries!" He cried, "Look at the devistation that was caused!" He motions to the smoking pile of wood. "I was there when it happened. My evil, EVIL, clone tried to light me ablaze! But I made it out, alive to tell the tale."

The crowd roared. Celebrating Novos surviving, and shouts of calls to kill Altilis sprang up across the mob.

"Pretorians! Bring me the criminal!" Novos shouted, almost theatrically.

4 men brought the weary Altilis before the crowd. His face reddened by the flames, clothes and accessories singed from the blaze.

The crowd began to shout, at first clattered and confused, but began to chant "crucify him!" Novos's breath hitched. He looked at the crowd and to his older brother. A man who he once loved and looked up to. He couldn't. He couldn't kill him. But the legionaries wouldn't accept sparing him. He had to give him a chance, something to make it out.

"LEGIONARIES! Calm down! I have a worse punishment in mind! Look at this man! He could survive years without food! I propse to let him rot in the dessert ALIVE."

The crowd roared again. It was settled. Novos motioned for the pretorians to follow him, which they did. The 6 walked deep into the Mojave desert before Novos grabbed Altilis from the pretorians and threw him to the ground. Altilis looked up to him, hopelessly. "Why... why didn't you just KILL me..."

Novos kneeled down to him, and gently kisses him on the forehead. "You're free, brother." He whispered. Novos gets up and walks back to fortification hill . Altilis, lying there to die.

[fiberglassandflowers]

Hey idk if there’s some master post about mbts but if there is may I please ask where and if not could I perhaps humbly request a description because it sounds cool as FUCK

omg yayy okay so there's not a masterpost as of now (though there is a google doc in the works that will probably be. very big) BUT i will try to give a brief rundown. underneath a readmore 👍

OK SO. IN SUMMARY

MARY BELL TOWNSHIP: more like mary bell CLOWNSHIT ha ha. heavy surveillance like everywhere (including in peoples homes. how fun). it's also got some like radiation stuff going on. all the residents are a lil radiation poisoned But it's mostly fine. also the town moves and i dont know why.

VANNIE OVERTURE: based on suburbia overture. the mayor who is a vampire. major control freak. sucks shit. like most of the reason mary bell is the way it is. permasmile swag. has killed before. hates when people are weird freaks and is actively passive aggressive if not outright aggressive.

TRIP LETWO: based on 2econd 2ight 2eer. world's silliestguy contrarian and infamous public nuisance. deeply tortured individual but shes dealing with it i guess. physically cant leave mary bell township. he has too much goddamn lore

LYDIE LAPLACE: based on laplace's angel. so lame. just deeply lame. killed a guy and got kicked out of office building heaven (laplace's inc. id give this its own section but it doesnt really matter all that much). i dont ever think about it unfortunately im sorry women.

MINA BYRD: based on i/me/myself. very sweet very nice. ladybugpilled socialanxietycel. doesnt have a whole lot going on but she is nice im glad shes there. im gonna have a significant relationships section of this but im saying that shes roommates with lia here bc its not really significant otherwise

WALTER LEE: based on ...well, better than the alternative. worlds first cis father to be a butch lesbian. probably a girl but she doesnt know that. weird nostalgia issues so bad his wife left him.

DOTTY LEE: ten years old. strange little girl but i dont really think about it a lot. not much else to say about her really.

LIA CRATES: based on outliars and hyppocrates. her name is pronounced like lie-uh cray-tees not lee-ah crayts. i have to clear this up because i realized most people were wrong LMAO. a little mean but not so much when you get to know her.

WARREN LEARY: based on blackboxwarrior. actually the worst therapist you will EVER meet. isnt even licensed. you book a session with her and she only talks about herself the entire time. constantly referencing a dark and contradictory past.

MARSHA TILLIS: based on marsha, thankk you for the dialectics. slightly better therapist! still not that good. has the spirit of an old man despite being in his 40s. will begin to psychoanalyze your behavior upon the first thirty seconds of knowing you.

NORMAN LEE: based on love, me normally. guy trying really really hard to be a regular guy. has a loooot of problems that stem from this. hugest people pleaser the world has ever known. a little bit offputting. has hair symbolism :-)

MORTIMER: based on memento mori. doesn't have a last name. worlds silliest grim reaper death thing. works in the death division for laplace's inc. lived a pretty normal life. then it died :-(. more here

FERN O'DYNAMIC: based on thermodynamic lawyer. hates his bitch wife (who is a praying mantis for. unknown reasons? will elaborate). just has a lot of anger inside him and doesnt know how to deal with it so he takes it out on other people. he kind of sucks but he's a neat character.

MIRANDA WRIGHT: the person being sung about in thermodynamic lawyer. bug wife (i can blame anything on radiation). she wasnt always a bug she just kinda did that idk. there's not much about her but she's an etymologist.

COTARD LETWO: based on cotard's solution. she has so many problems oh my gooood. deeply lonely person. fascinated with the macabre. its like coping mechanism that makes you worse. im insane about her writing a basic description is so difficult fkdjsfhsjd

RAMONA MCLAREN: based on red moon + hand me my shovel (though the latter was included later on bc it fit her). worlds most intelligent and stupid single celled organism. patheticswag. absolutely batshit insane. attempting to solve the end of the world.

KUIPER SUNSHINE: based on dr sunshine is dead. uh. i dont really know much about her to be honest SORRY... its really silly though + haver of prophetic dreams that she is NOT transparent about. fucks with people a lot just for funsies

COLIN THESIER: based on cover this song. girl who used to be in a band but got kicked out bc of friend drama. survivor of a toxic codependent queer friendship. trying to be a better person bc she used to suck pretty bad unfortunately. a bit more here

theres like a couple more characters but none of them are really important enough to give their own sections. debbie letwo is trip and cotards mom, laplace is the head of laplace's inc, maude is walter's ex wife who left him (heres the scoop on that).

OK NOTABLE CHARACTER DYNAMICS TIME:

VANNIE/NORMAN: norman has been pretending to be a normal dude this whole time + vannie totally fell for it. normans stuck in this friendship bc hes too much of a people pleaser to break it off even though vannie actively drains him emotionally. also he feels validated by vannie thinking hes normal. its so awful im so insane about their dynamic

VANNIE/TRIP: THEY HAAAATE EACH OTHER. their entire core beliefs are at odds (guy who thinks everyone should do their best to conform vs. guy who loves being a weird freak and doing fuck all). their dynamic is honestly pretty simple in comparison but theyre so petty and stupid its insane. if you put them alone in the same room one of them isnt coming out

TRIP/NORMAN: theyre gay together. there's a weird lore thing about the way relationships are handled in mary bell but long story short theres paperwork that has to be filled out if you want to be registered for one and trip thinks its really funny for xem and norman to constantly break up so they'll have to fill out the paperwork because it fucks with vannie. theyre also kind of awful and tragic

WALTER/DOTTY: that is a father and his daughter. walters trying his best and hes doing well but nothing would have been better than just moving out of mary bell township to raise his child.

WALTER/NORMAN: they’re brothers 👍 not much else to say there but they’re cool

WALTER/MAUDE: already linked a more in-depth explanation of their deal but ill summarize it here. maude thought living in mary bell township was really bad for a child (and it is) but since walter has issues about idealizing his childhood he was like "whaaat well i was raised here and im fine" and they fought about it and once it became clear walter wasnt changing his mind maude figured shed just spare herself from all of it. so she left 💯

WARREN/MARSHA: what if the two worst therapists ever were queerplatonic and violated hipaa together. also what if one of them [marsha] was helping the other [warren] because they're on the run from the law. would that be crazy or what

FERN/MIRANDA: actually awful. they really want to divorce but trip and norman keep clogging up the paperwork so theyre on a waiting list forever. their relationship was really good at one point but its not anymore :-( more info here

NORMAN/FERN: fern haaates norman because of the previously mentioned paperwork debacle but normans ass cant deal with the thought of anyone disliking him so hes just been really trying to get on his good side to no avail. also theyre coworkers so its more relevant

MORTIMER/TRIP: man how do i even summarize this one. due to lore reasons that you can read about in the link provided in trips session they have a super weird dynamic present day. or at least on trips end, mortimer is just super friendly to them and it wigs her out.

TRIP/COTARD: OUGUIGHJ. AOAUYFGDSFHSJ. tragic sibliiings. man i dont even know if i can go into this. go here and here if you want to learn more about them. jesus

COTARD/COLIN: frienndsss :-] classic extrovert forcing themselves into introverts life trope a little bit. they play music together and its great. mina's also in their little group but the two of them are closer

KUIPER/RAMONA: have been described by my friend as being "nonromantic freak4freak" and this is true. theyre working together on the end of the world stuff. they also rope cotard into it but thats lore i havent talked much about yet. go here and here for more info about them.

that might??????? be it?????? if there's more ill update it but thats the general basics i think. thank you for being interested and hopefully reading i greatly appreciate it :-)

[favouritefi]

I'm here to be bothersome about purror and erebark again. In your web of how the characters connect art, you have Little having a work crush on Jopson. I'm curious what Jopson feels about Little. Sorry if you've already answered this.

not a bother, my au is so convoluted that theres no way anyone but me can keep track of it all LOL. my answer became an insanely long stream of thought so its under the cut (you have been warned):

I’ve said before that jopson was initially hostile towards little and then he calms down and that it’s hard to tell what he thinks about little, part of that is bc jopson is so crozier focussed that all other people become secondary, the other part is bc they have known each other for far longer in this au than they have in canon so jopsons opinion of little has changed over the years as they both changed (for better and for worse). Like, little was there when jopson and crozier had their Big Fight and little visited jopson nearly as much as crozier visited him when jopson was Dying In The Arctic and little makes jopson coffee every morning and offers to do the chores the others don’t want to do when he’s not depression napping around the house and it’s very obvious that little respects jopson a lot / crushes on jopson a little bit and jopson is not stupid so he knows about littles feelings for him but its like. what is jopson meant to do with all of that? Someone once told me they really dislike the crozier and jopson in my au but i think that’s cause I haven’t elaborated enough on jopsons internal conflicts and feelings and history - jopson doesn’t really see himself as a catperson. What I mean is, jopson spent most of his adult life with crozier who treats him like a human, who treats him like he would any other man, and jopson is used to this and used to having this perception of himself as someone worthy of dignity and autonomy and respect. This is not the kind of life that all the other catboys in this household grew up with. Everyone else has been treated by humans like playthings or pets or vermin, only jopson has had the consistent experience of being treated like a Person, not an equal no, but a real Person. And he likes that. He likes crozier. No one else in the world is capable of giving that to jopson besides crozier. Little is lovely and kind and earnest and if jopson thought of himself as a catperson, if he had been adopted by anyone except crozier, then maybe him and little would meet at some soirée where the both of them are bored to death and jopson flirts with little just for fun and little responds with such schoolboy-like fluster that jopson is charmed and they start courting and falling in love and they get paraded around by their owners like a pair of whimsical trinkets and they might even be permitted to take care of / raise their nieces and nephews and so the two of them dont have to work anymore and they are excellent parents and its a wonderful life that jopson is happy with, but that didnt happen. crozier happened to jopson and jopson happened to crozier and this changes both of them irrevocably. sometimes jopson thinks about little and about what-ifs and imagines that he might be content with little, that its not too late to try, but then he checks the time and realizes he needs to start making dinner now if he wants to make that beef and potatoes dish that crozier likes so much. and when little compliments him on the dish he politely smiles and politely ignores little's adoration. so yeah, thats what jopson feels about little.

[pilotduty]

PILOT TALK TO ME ABOUT ZOMBIE SOULSUCKER PLS

HI LOVE OF MY LIFE i knew i could rely on u to be as Insane about this as me. putting it below the keep reading line because im about to unload the Directors Cut on you xo

SO a lot of people see soulsucker and starfucker to have a sort of angel/demon dynamic going on, and ive been eating that up because i looove the religious trauma angle this album is taking but then i was like What If st*r didn't align with typical religious imagery because... tbh that trope can get kind of bland.

him being brought back from the dead as a reference to clinging to the safety of the past and hesitance to accept/pursue change.. him being a character who is like the embodiment of everything awsten used to be and the parts of himself that havent changed even though the environment around him and the sound of his music have. st*r being dead makes him feel like he cant change no matter how badly he might want to. if he does something wrong, something that breaks the rules, he could literally physically fall apart. he doesnt know what's keeping him alive but he has to assume its some kind of godly power, because thats all he has as a frame of reference for life and death. but he's a creature that not even god can touch now. whether or not he realizes what that means for him, he knows that he can't go back to how he was, if he even knows what that would look like. he at the very least has the safety of already being dead- "if i'm already dead i can't be killed".

the important thing is that st*r is dead. or he should be. awsten can't figure out how to keep him dead, or re-kill him, or hide him away. no matter how badly he wants st*r gone, he doesn't seem to be going anywhere.

ok anyway heres design aspects that are Important To Me-

i gave him his scene-era haircut intentionally, i think it ads to his character representing his past self

upside down cross necklace because I Felt Like It

st*r's canon excessive layering is mostly to hide that he's dead and decaying

under his shirt his heart is exposed. im going to draw that next i think. theres a constant open wound over his heart- you can literally see directly into his heart :3

the places where his arms and fingers move a lot are the most prone to splitting- thats just a logistical design thing that i thought was cool it doesnt really Mean anything LOL

halo hair design. because of those rumors that he dyed his hair in a halo. unholy creature with holy traits etc etc

gave him that extremely hot and bad for me running/smudged eyeliner that has the little flecks of star glitter in them because It Looks Cool and theres Something there about having tiny stars under his eyes despite stars Not Being His Theme-Relevant Shape

the idea of him supergluing the edges of his gloves to his fingers to keep them from falling off while he performs popped into my head while i was drawing him and i thought you specifically would dig that concept. so.

soulsucker and st*r represent different ways awsten presents himself (i think- i kind of Dont Care about the lore that much ((i care So Much that was a lie)) and dont read other people's interpretations on it, but thats mine) so i think the idea of st*r trying desperately to hold himself together and fit the expectations/aesthetics of his job are kind of devastating from this angle, because he literally physically can't do it. whether its his own reluctance keeping him from doing it or some otherworldly/godly interference is up to interpretation methinks

more on its way i woke up like an hour ago and cant remember everything i wanted to say so sorry if none of this Matters or doesnt make any sense