#i may or may not have been going thru it!

[ur-fave-hoe-cas]

Yes ofc i remember that night

Its engrained into my memory

Its mainly the good shit i dont remember

And its not that i wanted u to do shit. Cuz i get it. U couldnt no matter how much u wanted to. But at the same time it doesnt make the shit that happened any less painful

I was 14 when i tried to kill myself for the first time. It didnt work and i was left on the bathroom floor pretty much dead and vunerable. The beating i got that night ill never fucking forget

It was 4 months after that i tried again. I got caught by father and stopped before i even had a fucking chance

I didnt try for a while after that

He said hed hurt u

I didnt want u to know

It was the night of ur death i tried again. Bat dragged me off the fucking tracks. I got beaten that night too

Cuz obvs u being dead was my fucking fault

Which is why i still think it was

The night i killed our parents i tried again

Again didnt fucking work

God im rly fucking bad at killing myself arent i?

So that was when i decided to learn first aid

Partly cuz if i was gonna keep on trying i didnt wanna be left in vulnerable situations and not being able to help myself

Partly cuz if i understood the body i could kill myself easier

Make it look like an accident ig

So all in all

Ive tried to kill myself 22 times

Which fucking sucks cuz i mean come on?

Why do i always fail at it so bad?

The last one being in mexico

And yh u may also have been going to be married off but i was the one they were trying to get a husband for at 15 so i could have kids by 16

Imagine someone dettas age having kids???

I fucking hate this

And no i dont know what it was like to go thru what u did

Which is why i dont compare it to what i did

Do u reckon i can stab dex in a non lethal way?

@ur-fave-hoe-cas

Probably

Use a needle

[meamiki]

its true!!

the original. well link to knowyourmeme but yanno. wahoo !

[the-holy-ghosted]

ratsune squeaku

so true

[kagooleo]

my WIPs are so unorganized but rice is forever, in doodles and Even when coding >:]

[starrysharks]

melody hoshimoto aka pigtail star !!

[pyrosomatic-metamorphosis]

mann im still thinking about that one foolish stream jaiden was on and was talking to him and forever (?) and said basically, “yeah roier is my platonic partner.” And like that alone fucking kills me but what nukes my tombstone is that IS. she said IS!! present tense roier IS her platonic partner. he’s married to cellbit but that doesnt change what they have!! cellbit Is roier’s romantic partner and jaiden Is roier’s platonic partner and one does not negate the other and fucking. it’s jaiden who says that. jaiden who was surprised to be invited to their wedding. she’s no less important to roier and she Knows that now. she was so reluctant to take up space in roier’s life (and i cant stop thinking about the house she built and then abandoned to live in his, and then to refer to the house as his) but here she is. roier has a new partner now but that doesnt mean she’s been replaced it just means that there’s a new place in his heart for a husband to go. she doesnt have to leave to make space he wants her to stay and she knows that.

[spaciebabie]

at first getting diagnosed with cptsd was like, "yay my trauma has been validated (it always was valid)!" and i really thought that was going to be it, but then i started to do research as i do whenever i realize i have something and learned that!! the way i experience socialization is!! quite horrid actually!!

[candycatstuffs]

Uhhh I've seen a lot of ppl start following me after seeing my old gf stuff bc of the gravity falls resurgence, so reminder!!!

I no longer post gravity falls on this blog!!!! All my gravity falls stuff old and new is on my sideblog @candycatfalls !!!!!!

[goosewizard]

it is the second time ranboo is hiding an eye from tubbo, and he forgot how terrible he is at it. they managed to keep it a secret for this long, though, so he can't stop now. they know his preferred eye size, managed to find out his preferred ring size without causing too much suspicion (they think), and today is the day. tubbo should be home any minute now.

oh, they're gonna throw up.

everything is going to be perfect, it has to be. he's rehearsed what he's going to say, how they're going to kneel, even practiced putting the ring on with michael (who is being the best little secret-keeper right now), so it's going to be fine. it's tubbo, how could it not be?

the door unlocks and ranboo promptly drops the box he'd been fiddling with.

he dives after it (quite heroically, one might say), forgetting that he is very tall and the floor is very far away. they land pretty hard on their shoulder but manage to keep the box from view of the door, which opens just in time for ranboo to gain some additional bodily harm as sweet michael all but tramples them to greet the man at the door.

scratch that. the bastard at the door.

because tubbo is doubled over cackling, wheezing something about family guy while he watches ranboo struggle to their feet. they should really reconsider marrying this guy. not even a ‘hello’, a ‘how are you’, an ‘are you ok’, this could be serious, tubbo could seriously be planning their demise. marriage is a lives-long commitment, ranboo can't just pick some guy who's gonna axe them for the insurance money. the guy in question scoops michael up and spins him around while the toddler shrieks in delight.

yeah, okay, plan’s still on.

speaking of, michael is whispering in tubbos ear prime dammit. ranboo suavely (read: panicking) plucks their kid out of tubbo's hands with a haha kids these days amirite and shoos michael off to play. they turn around and tubbo's smirking. aw man. he strolls up to them, grinning ear to ear saying darling, dearest, what is this plan that michael tells me about in that tone where he knows exactly what plan they have. ranboo groans as tubbo dances around them, going awww ranboo you like me so much you want to co-parent with me forever awww with that same shit-eating grin because he knows he's right. the situation would be more frustrating if ranboo wasn't head-over-heels for the man (literally, as of about a minute ago). they suppose he never explicitly said that the secret was to be kept from tubbo. hrm.

welp, cat's out of the bag and tubbo's not gonna get any less insufferable about it, so he may as well just do it. ranboo looks tubbo in his eyes (he's wearing one of the first ones they made for him) and steadily gets on one knee. tubbo's being very composed, but his little goat tail's going a mile a minute. it offers ranboo a sense of relief. its tubbo, and with any luck, it'll always be tubbo.

they begins their speech, only stumbling over their words a few times and keeping easy eye contact with tubbo for the duration. when they get to the part with the ring and almost drop the dang box again, tubbo laughs harder than is really necessary, giddy about the whole thing. they're both smiling hard when ranboo asks tubbo underscore, will you marry me? for real this time and opens the box.

not to brag, but they really knocked it out of the park. inside the box is a simple and sturdy copper ring with a honeycomb pattern etched in. there is also an eye, made of quartz and diamond with a netherite pupil shaped like a heart.

tubbo honest-to-prime squeals and drags ranboo in for one of those kisses where it’s all teeth because they can’t stop smiling. he says yes, of course. the ring is on in an instant and tubbo dashes to the nearest mirror to put the new eye in, asking a million questions about how much this cost and how’d they sculpted it like that and if he can have one of lapis or amethyst next. michael trots over to the commotion and is promptly scooped up by tubbo who tells him michael youre not going to be part of a broken home anymore. ranboo points out that the home in question was never broken in the first place, which his fiancee (!) ignores.

as he watches his husband-to-be show off his ring and eye to their son, ranboo thanks whoever is up there that this is who he gets to spend his days with. to have and to hold, to bicker over flowers and colors, in sickness and in health, in war and in peace, theyll be together, ranboo and tubbo, against the world.

part 1 | part 2

[nemotakeit]

i think that if we dig all the way down to the roots of tøp's musical theme, it all comes down to that constant internal conflict between desperately wanting to be seen and desperately wanting to stay hidden. we can see how they've been making gradual progress in "managing the tension" but it's still there on Clancy. dare i say it's the central theme of the lore as well.. the reason the character & the era Clancy feels so rebellious is because he's actively fighting to Be Seen. the oscillation continues, but a subversive variable has emerged.

[fallowfrog]

TIL if u play bad to the bone behind the opening cutscene of dmc4 it actually works

[milkbreadtoast]

yu junghyeok and prince cedric have like practically the same design (+v similar personality) but listen the Vibes they have r diff... idk if this makes sense but u know charas w tired dilf energy... YJH has that but not cedric.. hes like a baby.. the way I describe it is YJH is babygirl but cedric is just my baby🫂🔥🔥🔥*gets incinerated* SKJDJ idk if it's noticeable at all but I try to capture diff vibes when I draw them....

when i draw cedric i try to go full shoujo... he is a romance novel male lead... sparkly eyes bright colors 90s anime blush... goes full squish mode when drawing him chibi MFNSKJ🤭

but when i draw yjh im like... no i have to convey the Angst and Depression.... *gives him dark circles and takes the light from his eyes*😇🖤

idk if it's noticeable but I also try to differentiate their designs in subtle ways (besides eye color etc),,, I give them diff eyebrow shapes!! I like YJH with triangle brows(thicker at the ends) and cedric w tapered brows(thicker toward the middle) like the webtoon... I also try to make cedric's hair a bit curlier than YJH🥹

[jrueships]

zesty lowkey just another way for str8 ppl to say faggot / faggy and get away with it

[tchaikovskaya]

currently rotting in my bed thinking about summer 2019 and how much hope i had for the future and now its 5 yrs later and i have still not Moved On even tho everyone else in my life has and nothing turned out the way i always assumed it would. and how badly i wish i could go back and relive and savor those moments even if i couldnt change the way things thenceforth would unfold

[wynn-ing]

just caught up with what remains and fuck im so invested in ur little guys - question tho, how long has each voiced been with their voices? i know eti had para for only a year at the start of the series, and pasha and hunted have been together for his whole life - but what abt the others? sorry if this was mentioned somewhere in whats already written my brain is swiss cheese

also i totally understand if u cant answer this for spoilery reasons

it's not really a spoiler at all! At most some of them may hint some things but nothing that'll make any sense unless it comes up, so here's the list;

Etti: as you said, since about a year before the first fic

Page: a few months before Etienne, so about a year and a half before the first fic

Locke: since they were like 16! Hero showed up in the middle of an exam and they got kicked out for shrieking at the top of their lungs. He's apologetic but they don't mind, it was only Physics. They weren't going to pass anyway, they didn't study for it at all.

Pasha: Hunted showed up when he was only 5. This went exactly as you'd expect for both of them

Loren: summoned the Wild when they were 13, after having been told by the doctor they had maybe 2 years left at best. They figured they'd give alternative medicine (read: summoning a literal god into their body) a chance. It worked! This was 3 years after they first met Pasha btw

Mal: she's had smitten for ... I don't know the exact number of years, she's being cagey, but she got him in uni so anywhere between 18 and 24 depending on when she went to uni. She likes to only reveal things to me when they're funny or dramatic so this info is new to me too. All I knew before was that she's had him for 'a long time'. I actually don't know her exact age either she won't say

Leonore: she's had Oppy for 5 years before her introduction into the book, and you saw the rest in realtime.

Envy: only had Cheated for a few months before their introduction into the story

Violet: similarly only had Contrarian for about 9 months before her introduction.

Kyra: has had Cheated for a year and a half.

Ghost: only got Cold like 2 days before his introduction into the story lol.

Alice: summoned Nightmare as a playmate when she was a child. She was only 15 in the first fic.

Foster: inherited their voice from birth

Forrest: summoned Witch like 2 months before being captured

Larissa: :) you'll find out

Uhhh did I get everyone? Lmk if I missed someone and feel free to ask follow up questions (except about Larissa. Got nothing good to say about her) but yeeeeasss I believe that's all of them! Thank you for being invested in my lil sillies I'm so happy <3 <3 yippeee!

[flebus]

getting that art happenstance in which i reeeaally thought if i finished a long-form project and made gains in the indie comic scene i would feel like what i was doing wasn't totally aimless and yet now that 2024 (objectively my best art year in my life probably) is drawing to a close i feel the exact same way that i did about my art in 2022 (totally aimless). what gives. 😭