#i made this with the story im writing and this song is a big inspiration for said story!!!

[weirdlittlefish]

RETURN TO SENDER - ADDRESSEE DECEASED

[sweettea-and-honeybutter]

Take You There II

Song that inspired this chapter...

A/N: Whewwww thank you for your patience 🥲💕 um I actually don't know what's happening to me but im actually enjoying? writing a slow burn?!? I just really love what's happening here in their little world. The whole story is inspired by HER's Take You There, but I love music so much not to have a different song on replay for every chapter I write. As always your feedback, likes, and rebloggs are so appreciated 🥰

Pairing: Terry Richmond x Reign Adisa (black female OC)

Warning: its a smidge explicit in the beginning, but other than that its a steamy, slightly angsty fluff

Word Count: 5,791 🥴

Part 1

Chapter 2

Reign tried to divide her attention evenly between her chatty client explaining her plans for an anime sleeve, and the fine details she was trying to capture on the girl's bicep. Her 19th birthday was right around the corner and Reign had the pleasure of giving her her first tattoo, a cute black cat from Sailor Moon that showed up beautifully on her tan skin. But if she were completely honest, her mind was also distracted with persistent thoughts of one Terry Richmond.

He texted her a few hours after he’d left, asking her to give him a list of places she liked and he’d pick one to take her too, still wanting to surprise her but needing to be pointed in the right direction being so new to the area. She didn’t expect him to keep up the conversation after that, but he texted her all night and day. His texts were short and straight forward, even when complimenting her scent and noting how it lingered on his clothing. But he was consistent and inquisitive and she liked it, knowing he was much warmer in person. 

Reign went through the motions of wrapping her client’s tattoo, nodding along as the woman gushed over how perfectly she’d captured Luna’s personality. But Reign’s focus kept slipping—an almost electric feeling humming in her chest, like a live wire sparking whenever she thought of Terry. After her last client left, he’d be there to pick her up. The thought of being close to him again—close enough to catch that smile that seemed like it was meant just for her, to fall into those eyes whose intensity shifted like the sky before a storm—made her heart race in a way she hadn’t ever felt before. She’d been attracted to plenty of men and women alike, but the anticipation of discovering everything there is to know about Terry had her buzzing with energy.

Reign walked her client to the door, trying her hardest not to rush the oblivious girl, and as soon the door shut behind her, Reign turned and sprinted to the bathroom, eager to freshen up and change clothes for the night. She shot Terry a quick text letting him know to come on in when he gets there and proceeds to strip out of her comfy clothes. She reapplied the tonka bean body butter she’d put on earlier today fresh out of her morning shower, and then hit all the warm areas on her skin with her signature jasmine perfume, hoping that throughout the night her scent wafts to Terry's nose every time his gaze makes her body flush. 

All the places she’d sent Terry were pretty lowkey, so she kept her outfit for the night simple-a black linen button down paired with a forest green suede skirt, a black belt with a gold buckle, and knee high black boots with a sturdy heel that was comfortable to walk in. She began putting on the layers of her fit, panicking when she realized she packed her nice lace panties and totally forgot to grab the matching bra. She turned her duffle bag upside down grumbling to herself “..my titties are too big for this shit” as she frantically looked through all the belongings she’d brought with her knowing she wouldn't have time to go back home after work. Still rummaging through her clothes, she heard her front door chime, opening and closing softly. Quiet steps moved around her studio and she cursed under her breath, still topless while quickly zipping her skirt up and clearing her throat.

“Um Terry?” she hated how loud and high her voice came out, it echoed around the tiny bathroom and she could hear the nerves in her shrill tone.

“Reign.” his deep voice sounded close, and amused, and it sent goosebumps traveling up her body.

“I-I’ll be out in just a second!” 

She hurriedly shrugged on her shirt, buttoning it and stylishly tucked it into her skirt. Her racing thoughts drowned out any response he might’ve given from the other side of the door. The soft material brushed her skin, and she sighed as her nipples peaked, prominent against the fabric. She’d been aiming for a cutesy vibe, something mindful and demure as the youngins would say. The snug fit of her blouse told a totally different story. 

After a moment’s hesitation, she undid the top three buttons, letting the fabric fall open just enough to reveal the soft swell of her cleavage. The look suddenly felt intentional, the perfect balance of bold and effortless. She bit her lip, glancing at her reflection; it was daring, different, but she couldn’t deny that she looked damn good. With no time left to second-guess herself, she added a few simple accessories, winged liner, mascara, and gathered her braids into a playful half-up, half-down style.

~~~~~~~~

Reign danced around all of Terry’s thoughts since he walked into her world. He truly intended for this tattoo to be a sweet reminder of the bond he shared with his cousin, and while it did serve that purpose, he can’t deny how his mind instantly goes to Reign whenever he looks at it. The gentle way she’d look up at him every so often while she worked, the way she quietly held space for him to unload the grief he carried, her sympathetic affection somehow coaxing him to be open when he’d vowed to close himself off from the rest of the world—he didn't yet have the words to tell her how much that moment meant to him.

Terry knew he was a goner the moment he caught himself grinning at her texts. He didn’t always know what to say, but he didn’t care—he just wanted to be in her thoughts, to have her thinking of him as much as he was thinking of her. Bit by bit, he was learning the quirks that made her who she was. She was a surprisingly animated texter, dropping memes and emojis that made him laugh harder than he’d expected. She had a sweet tooth, a green thumb, and a case of insomnia, which he discovered only after he’d fallen asleep trying to respond to something funny she’d sent at two in the morning. Each new detail felt like a tiny gift, pulling him in deeper than he’d ever planned.

The next day in the early afternoon he headed to the gym to burn off some of his restless energy. He wasn’t exactly nervous, just eager to see her again. A lightness had crept into him that he hadn’t felt in years, a tentative hopefulness about this new city and all it could bring. He reminded himself not to get attached to any particular outcome with her, promising to stay present, to let things unfold naturally. But already, he knew she wasn’t someone he wanted to experience lightly. He wanted to savor every moment, to truly explore who she was, layer by layer.

That thought alone had his desire for her spreading throughout his being like a wildfire. He caught himself wondering if her skin was as soft as it looked, feeling a need to trace his fingers over each tattoo she wore and memorize every curve of her body. She was so beautiful, yet somehow guarded beneath that serene aura. She seemed to move through life unfazed, as if no one could intrude on the calm she’d carved out for herself. Her quiet self-assurance was so enticing to him, and he hoped she’d keep letting him close enough to discover all that she was.

Reign gave him a good variety of places they could go to tonight, little did she know that in due time he planned to go to each of those places with her. But for the night he chose the modern looking food hall because it had so many appetizing options for them to try, and plenty of cozy seating options where he could have her all to himself—no persistent waiters interrupting their conversations, no noisy couples sat too closely to them, he could practically have her all to himself.

The sun was setting as Terry showered, and he wondered if he’d ever get the chance to have Reign in this steamy space with him. He needed to have a clear head when he was with her, needed to have self control to patiently wait for her to let him in. So he leaned back against the warm tile and stroked himself, groaning at the memory of her elusively dark eyes and the idea of tasting the plump lips she chewed on insistently. He let his fantasies guide his hands, thrusting into his fist faster and faster as they became more vivid. Terry cursed and came at the mental image of her writhing under him moaning his name. As he caught his breath and finished his shower he hoped that was enough to keep his thoughts tame for the rest of the night.

Terry dressed quickly, eager to see his—no, to see Reign. He shrugged into a black polo, leaving the top button open, the shirt framing his muscles in a way he hoped would have her eyeing him like she did yesterday, when she thought he wasn’t looking. Dark jeans and black Off-White sneakers completed the fit, and he sprayed cologne over every place he imagined her lips brushing. Grabbing his leather jacket, keys, wallet, and the plant he’d picked up for her earlier, he left his apartment in a hurry, heart already a step ahead.

~~~~~~~

“Okay, whew! Sorry you had to wait! I left something at home, and—” Reign came rushing out of the bathroom, words tumbling to a stop as she spotted Terry leaning back against a chair, one arm draped casually behind him, the other hand resting in his pocket.

They paused, eyes dragging slowly over one another, each undressing the other in their minds. Reign noticed his gray eyes darkening to a stormy, sinful shade, his easy grin widening as he took in her outfit. She couldn't help notice the way the muscles in his thighs flexed as he straightened to his full height, letting out a low whistle.

“Well, don’t you look nice, pretty Reign.” Terry didn’t miss the slight wobble in her step as she closed the space between them. His gaze traced over every detail, his mouth watering at the familiar sweetness of her perfume.

“Yeah,” she breathed, stopping just in front of him and tilting her head up with a soft smile, “you clean up nice too, soldier.” His eyes flicked from her glossed lips back to those warm brown eyes, and he fought the urge to lean in and taste her right there.

Terry pulled himself from his thoughts, his voice soft as he said, “I got something for you.” With a small smile, he revealed the Calathea he’d been hiding behind his back, and Reign’s pretty eyes went wide behind her glasses, a look of genuine delight spreading across her face. The bag she was holding dropped with a careless thud as she gingerly took the beautiful plant into her hands.

“Holy shit!” she whispered, stepping back to admire it more fully, her voice bright with excitement. Terry couldn’t help but feel a spark of pride, knowing he’d chosen well.

"I don’t know anything about plants,” he admitted with a grin, “but I wanted to get you something unique and beautiful… this one felt like you.”

Reign’s smile, wide and warm, made his mind go blank for a moment, and made his dick twitch awake unbeknownst to her. Her hand found his, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“I love it! I shall call her Maria!” she said, grinning as she skipped over to her desk, carefully setting the plant down under the warm glow of a lamp. He watched her every movement, eyes glued to the sway of her hips and the soft gleam of her exposed skin. When she finally turned back to him, her eyes sparkled, and his chest tightened at his growing feelings for her.

Terry cleared his throat to dissipate the emotion in his voice and picked up her bag, ever the gentleman. He turned his large body halfway towards the door saying “I’m ready when you are.” and Reign nodded happily, turning off lights here and there as she walked past him and he followed a few steps behind, trying not to crowd her space but feeling he was unable to escape the gravitational pull of her aura. She gave her studio one last glance before she opened the door for them, turning to lock up her space and jumping slightly at the feeling of Terry’s large hand on her hip. His touch was warm and grounding, and she let him pull her into his side towards his sleek matte gray BMW x6 M.

~~~~~~~

The drive to Lyric Market was brief but felt like an eternity for Reign. She couldn’t sit still, the scent of his cologne enveloping the car—woody, slightly spicy, and irresistibly masculine. Every breath made her squirm as she fought the urge to melt into a puddle right beside him. When he shot her a curious look, she could only manage a tight smile, acutely aware of her lack of subtlety but unable to play it off.

Terry handed her his unlocked phone, declaring her the DJ for the ride. As the melodic vocals of Sinead Harnett filled the air, Reign let the music express what her tongue couldn't. She watched him with yearning eyes as he reached one long arm toward her, hesitatingly hovering over her thigh before finally resting his hand on the exposed skin just below the hem of her skirt. He didn’t apply any pressure, merely grazing his thumb in mindless circles, affirming his earlier thought that she was as soft as she looked. Reign felt warmth pooling between her legs, almost overwhelming, and she bit her lip, glancing out the window and reminding herself to breathe.

Sensing he might be crossing a line, Terry began to retract his hand, but before he could pull away, she gently covered his with her own, their fingers entwining and remaining that way for the rest of the fifteen-minute drive.

~~~~~~~

Reign inhaled the crisp night air deeply as soon as he opened her door, finally easing her mind away from the depraved movies of them playing in her head. Terry gave her one of his fleeting smiles as he returned his hand to her hip, gripping her tighter when he thought she shivered from the chilly air. 

“I’m so happy you chose the food hall!” Terry was finding it hard to look anywhere else that wasn’t Reign. His gaze was intently on her as they walked in, watching her eyes dance under the bright lights as she told him of the waffles from this one place here that she’d been thinking about all day. 

He leaned his head down closer to hers as they walked towards the restaurant, unable to stop himself as his lips grazed the shell of her ear, 

“I couldn’t get you out of my head this whole day, and you’re telling me all you could think of is-” he paused dramatically, voice dropping to an impossibly deeper octave, “waffles?”

His incredulous tone made Reign snort out a laugh, giving him a cheeky smile as she just barely gave him a side eye.

“You haven’t tried these Terry. The magnificence of the Belgium waffle will change your life!” He doubted it, but he wasn’t going to ruin her fun. 

“I’ll try some of yours then, I think I’m feeling ramen for myself tonight.” Reign just nodded and stepped up to the iPad at the counter to place her order. Terry’s hand moved up her hip, to her back, playing with her hair while he looked around the place for them to sit. He turned his attention back to her when felt her start to remove her tiny purse from her shoulder, and he scoffed, gently moving her out of the way so he could pay for her food. 

“I don’t even know why you brought that like I was gonna let you pay for your food when I asked you out.” his displeased voice almost sounded like a growl and Reign found that deeply amusing. 

“Well I didn’t want to assume, but thank you Terry.” He nodded and grabbed her hand, guiding her towards the ramen spot while her order was being made. It was her turn to observe him under the bright lights in the building. His warm hazelnut complexion created a beautiful contrast where he held her hand, and she admired how their outfits uncannily complemented each other. The wide expanse of his back moved confidently as he walked, and she wondered what it’d be like to wrap her legs around him, if her thighs would get fatigued from squeezing because he was just that wide. 

Reign didn’t really hear anything he said to the restaurant worker as he ordered, too lost in her head imagining that deep voice saying all sorts of nasty things to her. She stood close behind him, feminine frame being concealed behind his massive body, so it’s no surprise the young woman behind the counter didn’t see her, and flirted shamelessly with Terry. 

Terry looked absolutely bored as he listed off the things he wanted, growing more irritated by the second and Reign was none the wiser, eyes trailing down to his ass because really, what else was she to do back there? Once he paid, Terry turned away from the worker who lacked all decorum, rejecting the receipt that had her number on it, and looked down at Reign who had the cutest caught expression on her face. His face softened as he pulled her a little ways away from the restaurant but positioned her so she could be seen, and he swallowed a laugh at the way the worker huffed and walked away. 

They waited for their food and talked about their day. He listened attentively, loving how passionately she spoke of her work. He wanted to touch her as she spoke of all the tattoos she did that day, but he noticed outside of her studio, she moved a lot, kind of slowly swaying to some beat in her head as she talked. The subtle shift of her skirt, and the swell of her breasts moving beneath her shirt, was hypnotizing, and he hung onto her every word.

They got their food and he carried it for them, leading them upstairs to a high backed booth that faced away from the other patrons and activity. They sat so close to each other their thighs touched, and neither of them minded. Terry was just taking out his chopsticks when his ears were blessed with the most wanton moan, and he looked down at Reign, his eyes round and mouth hanging open slightly. 

Reign admittedly forgot where she was, as soon as she took a bite of her waffled monte Cristo. She’s just now realizing she’d been too distracted to remember to eat much today, and the sweet and savory combination on her taste buds made everything else fade away. Yes, even Terry himself. 

“Mmhmm, that’s what I wanted.” She was too hungry to be embarrassed, too far gone in her ecstasy to be modest about her pleasure. Reign slowly blinked her eyes open, chewing carefully to savor every bite and looked over at Terry with a dopey smile. 

His unnerving stillness made her freeze. She’d never seen his eyes so dark, and his upper body was slightly leaning over her, his head cocked to the side so he could peer at her face, not wanting to miss a single second of her. She brushed some of her braids from her face, her smile turning sheepish. 

“Sorry, I am staaaarving” she tried to make light of the moment with her tone, trying to ignore the hungry look in his eyes so she, herself, didn’t lose all self control. “Try some!”

He didn’t say anything, just watched her cut him a piece, and opened his mouth obediently when she brought the food up to his lips. Her eyes were glued to his mouth as his tongue darted out to lick powdered sugar from his bottom lip, and she couldn’t help how her fingers grazed his jaw lightly when she pulled her hand back.  

He closed his eyes finally and moaned much quieter, breathing deeply, not at the taste of the food, although it was good, but at the amount of restraint he was exerting. He wanted to eat her right on the table. In due time he was telling himself. He swallowed, exhaled, and opened his eyes playfully sizing her up. 

“Yeah that was life changing pretty Reign.” He turned to his food, and began eating, leaving her to watch his prominent jaw as he chewed his own food, as if they both weren’t dangerously close to causing a scene just moments ago. 

The rumble in her tummy brought her back to her plate, and she continued to eat happily, more aware and mindful of her volume. He finished much faster than she did, and she insisted that he share her fries with her. He wrapped an arm around her, playing with the edge of her skirt and she commented on physical touch being his love language. 

“Hmm I think all of them would be my love language for the right person” he fed her a fry and continued “I assume your main one is words of affirmation?”

Reign gave him a funny look. “You calling me a yapper?” And he barked out a surprised laugh.

“No Reign, it was just a guess” she rolled her eyes half heartedly pushing her empty plate away.

“Nah the truth is out pretty boy, now you need to buy me a drink to get back in my good graces” he laughed at her again as he stood and pulled her up out of the booth. He was about to lead her to the bar when she stopped him.

“Nope, over here.” And she dragged him, he purposefully let his feet become heavy because watching her struggle was amusing, over to a place where they could get milkshakes. 

“Your sweet tooth is insatiable pretty girl” she smiled up at him and asked for strawberry and offered to split it with him, and he got the clichéd 2 straws. They sat on the diner style barstools and passed the milkshake back and forth, talking about all sorts of things. 

She told him about her plans to soon share her studio with more artists, and her dreams of hosting community events there. He admitted to feeling a bit lost, but determined to find more purpose for his life after everything that happened. They asked each other so much as the time pleasantly passed. She avoided answering questions about past relationships, and he avoided questions about his family.

Sudden thunder booming outside made her jump and caused Terry to pull her close to him, losing his train of thought at her hand on his chest, right over his racing heart. Reign groaned looking toward the front door. 

“I forgot I walked to work today, I don’t remember rain being in the forecast” Terry tried not to look too eager at that. 

“You know I gotchu” he pulled her up out of her seat and gently tugged her skirt down from where it slid up her thick thighs, “I can take you home.”

~~~~~~~

The rain was relentless outside. They were so consumed by each other earlier, they didn’t even realize how much it was coming down.  Reign invited Terry inside, not yet ready for him to leave despite how late it was, and he followed her inside telling himself he’d be on his best behavior for her.

Her place was cozy and inviting, much like her studio, and smelled just as sweet as her. She had an apartment on the third floor, the complex nestled against a wooded area, giving her place an almost treehouse feel to it. He watched her move comfortably around her home, dick growing hard unsurprisingly at the domestically of it all.

He heard a little bell jingle and watched a small orange cat with a polka dot bow tie collar trot towards him from down the hall. 

“I forgot to ask you if you like cats! That’s Kento, he’s very sweet.” Reign smiled fondly at the fluffy little thing she loved so much,  and observed Terry crouch down to let Kento smell his hand. After he apparently passed the vibe check, he picked the kitty up and held him in the palm of his hand, chuckling at the loud purrs leaving it. 

“Kento huh? I might steal you away in my pocket” Reigned faked a gasp and snatched her son back, setting him down on his palm tree shaped cat tree.

“You’ve been on my mind all day, and all you want to do is kidnap my only child from me?” she mocked his tone from earlier, making her voice comically deep.

He stood to his full height, casually putting his hands in his pockets and walking around her chairs in her living room not looking at her as he states “that's not all I want to do Reign.”

She swallowed from where she stood by her patio door, watching him drift closer to her as he looked at all her things. He finally stopped in front of her, a playful seriousness on his face as he asked her “what are you hiding out there?” He tilted his head at her patio and she reached behind her to open the door. 

The rain slowed and the thunder was slowly rolling away from them, the trees by her balcony preventing her patio from getting wet, and she turned on the twinkling fairy lights that adorned her railing. She had soft turf covering the cement, and lush hanging plants gently swinging near a wide outdoor sofa. Terry sat down and spread his arms across the back of the chair, looking up at her, looking straight out of a fantasy. She stood with her back to the railing, not sure what to do under such an intense gaze. 

“Oh um-” her voice came out high and she cleared her throat, trying to calm her nerves, “how’s your new piece holding up?” she gestured to his chest, and he grinned, dropping his arms to unbutton the rest of his polo.

“You tell me.” She was helpless to fight the command in his deep voice, its timbre drawing her near as she sat next to him, placing a hand on his broad thigh to brace herself as she leaned up towards him. Her heart thundered like the night sky as she used her other hand to move his shirt. Terry watched her like a cat would a mouse, hungry and patient. She gave him a proud little smile, knowing he was following all her aftercare instructions seeing as how it looked really good still. 

“It looks great” she looked up at him and her breath caught in her throat. They were so close now, and Terry couldn’t help but lick his lips at the sight of her-lids heavily half concealing her dark eyes, and her smell so intoxicatingly sweet, and her touch burning his thigh damn near setting his body on fire. 

“Words can’t express how much I appreciate you for yesterday Reign.” His eyes danced between hers and her lips, and he brought his big hand up to cup her jaw, using his thumb to graze her bottom lip. 

“May I?” She didn't fully know what Terry meant, nor did she care; her answer was already a hurried, breathless nod.

He groaned when their lips finally met. He fucking knew it, her lips were plush and soft, her gloss tasted so sweet, and that damn jasmine scent invaded his senses, making him feel drunk off her. 

And Reign. She felt like she was drowning in the energy of the moment. The once calm waters of her soul were surging forward as if the levee broke. She put all of her longing into that kiss, didn’t even know she wanted him this badly until this very second. She moaned, the hand on his thigh gripping tightly now, anchoring herself to him, and her other hand fisting his shirt trying to pull him impossibly closer. 

Terry’s hand on her jaw moved to the back of her head and tugged her braids just enough to tilt her head up more, prompting her to open her mouth, inviting her with his tongue to take everything she needed from him, sighing into her letting her know that he was ready and willing to be consumed completely. 

Reign just couldn’t get close enough, moaning more desperately at the feel of his teeth softly tugging her bottom lip. She boldly threw her leg over his lap, shifting to straddle him. Terry all but growled into the kiss that had turned overwhelmingly lustful, and his hands had a mind of their own, grabbing generous handfuls of her round ass, her skirt up around her waist forgotten as she broke the kiss to breathe. 

She threw her head back, hair now a messy halo around her and she moaned again, grinding her ruined panties on the imposing bulge in his pants. Terry’s hips bucked up into her, fingertips squeezing the softness of her ass, and he left bruising kisses down her neck, needing her to take more and more of him. 

“Terry” the way she moaned his name, voice beautifully deep and breathless, was a shock to his system, as if cold ice water had been poured down his back. He inhaled sharply, hands moving to hold her back tightly, stilling her movements.

A scary thought flashed in his mind, she’s too good to be true. Terry doesn’t like the turn his mind is taking, he inhales again, soothing his hands along her back as she whimpered above him trying to understand through the haze of desire fogging her mind.

All of this is too good to be true, what did you do to deserve this? Terry fought hard to stay present, to ground himself in the moment, but now so many thoughts were shouting at him, demanding to ruin this fucking beautiful moment. He rested his forehead against her neck, feeling her pulse slow as she tentatively rubbed his shoulders. He groaned, defeated.

“I want you so badly, Reign.” His body was so tense and holding on to her so tightly, she wanted to reassure him that she wants him too, but something told her he wasn't finished.

“I…I’m trying to take my time, trying to be intentional because that’s what you deserve.” He finally brought his head up to look her in the eyes. Both of them reflected such yearning back to each other. He nuzzled her nose softly with his own before continuing.

“And I’m trying to show myself that this is something I can trust. I feel that I can trust this.” His eyes shifted to an imploring green in the low lighting, begging her to understand. 

“So much has been snatched from me, and I want this so badly Reign. After today, the ball is in your court.” He gave her a quick kiss to stop whatever she was about to say. 

“I know I can trust you with whatever hold you have on me. But just for tonight, I need to show myself that I can exist outside of that fight or flight setting I’m so used to.” He gave her a sad smile, bringing one hand from her back to move her braids away from her face. He wanted to say more, he just didn’t know how. 

Reign looked intently into Terry’s eyes, seeing all the emotions he was trying to keep at bay. She understood more than he knew, the scary process of learning to trust again, learning to truly live again. It was a delicate dance, one capable of breaking down the strongest of foundations. She returned his sad smile, not disappointed in the moment being over, but sad that they could relate in such a way. 

Reign kept her eyes on his, the quiet understanding between them filling the space, almost tangible. She could see the depth of his struggle, the way he was bracing himself, and she knew words would only scratch the surface of what she wanted him to feel. Gently, she brought one of her hands to his chest, resting it over his heart. She could feel the steady, guarded beat beneath her palm, and she let her touch linger, grounding him in that softness.

After a moment, she leaned in, her lips brushing just beneath his ear, and whispered, “You don’t have to be afraid with me, Terry. I know what’s in my hands, and I’ll hold it carefully.” Her voice was barely above a breath, but each word carried the weight of her promise, steady and sincere.

When she pulled back to meet his gaze, she gave him a small, knowing smile, her hand still pressed to his heart. The look in her eyes was as clear as anything she could say: I see you, and I’m not going anywhere.

And Terry, who rarely found solace in words, felt something in him unwind just a little. He brought his hand up to cover hers, squeezing it gently, letting her touch settle the ache he hadn’t been able to name.

He drove home that night basking in the quietness she’d left in his mind, his tortured thoughts had morphed into simply replaying sweet scenes with her. And she fell asleep much easier than she normally does, waters of her soul not just serene on the surface, but all the way down to her ocean floor.

~~~~~~~

Not me just now realizing this may be the same Terry from Sweet Dreams 💀. I have a really raunchy request and a spooky request to fulfill before I can post chapter 3 🥲 but hopefully an update will come faster than the last one 💕 thank you in advance for your patience!!!

Taglist: @teddybeerz @liatreads @eviescloset @sageispunk @planetblaque @soft-persephone @violetmuses @miyuhpapayuh @iterum-incipi @slutsareteacherstoo @blackgurlnhermoods @helloncrocs @megamindsecretlair @meannaim @blyffe @nun0ir @onherereading @eilujion @maria-gab-rielle @gg-trini @gwenda-fav @violetlovezzz @keyaho @nahimjustfeelingit-writes @uzumaki-rebellion @honeytoffee @avoidthings @brattyfics @abeautifulmindexposed @blowmymbackout @kumkaniudaku @pocketsizedpanther @mysecretdiaryofableedingheart @amyhennessyhouse

[jetii]

i loveeeeeee ur writing. its like a masterpiece. mwah. i was wondering if you could do an angsty fic with the prompt "I loved you!" with any clone boy you want (maybe crosshair 👀) I was listening to Cardigan by taylor swift and it lowkey set the mood.

sorry if the request is very vague cause i never watched bad batch yet im a huge simp 🥲 so do whatever you want.

I know you got like a tonnnn on your plate and i lowkey feel bad requesting but you write really good so take ur time to take care of yourself.

hiiiii anon. if you are who i think you are, then you'll have already been watching TBB by now, but if you're not, what are you doing!! /affectionate

after listening to the song (i have a sister who is a swiftie but alas i am not) and thinking harder about your prompt, i was inspired to write this for Echo, so i hope that's okay!

The Way Back

Pairing: Echo x fem!Reader

Words: 9,621

Tags/Warnings: angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort, established relationship, dramatic reunion, reader is a lawyer, Tech is a good brother, Echo needs a hug, allusion to panic attacks/alcoholism/depression

Summary: Echo always knew you were it for him, but the idea of seeing you again after so much has changed is more than he can take. Until one day he finds himself outside of your apartment, and the choice is made for him.

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Echo doesn’t leave the ship when it docks on Coruscant.

His eyes are locked on the city-planet, lit up like a giant firefly, watching the endless stream of ships coming in and out. Their trails of light make the whole thing seem dreamlike, surreal. Even that feels like too much, reminds him too much of the view from your apartment, and he tries to close his eyes, but his eyelids are made of glass.

The first time he saw Coruscant, there had been a moment of... what, awe? Terror? Something. Something big, anyway. He didn't understand then that you can have a feeling be a lot of things. He'd looked down on the galaxy's center of power and felt something bigger than he could possibly contain. Now, sitting alone on the Marauder with only the whirr of the vents for company, he thinks maybe the feeling was dread.

The first time they came back here after Echo joined the Batch, the others didn’t notice his unease. Or at least they didn't mention it. It was an adjustment period for everyone, Echo most of all, and his brothers gave him space to do things on his own terms, even when it meant he did nothing at all.

This time, it's different. He can tell they've noticed how he's been acting, and they're not just leaving him alone anymore. He can tell, because they're giving him looks. The kind of looks that ask questions he doesn't have answers for. They make excuses to stick close by, like they're afraid he might take off or that he's going to break down and have another panic attack. It makes him want to hide even more.

He's not going to, though. It's not so bad. Coruscant has always been a source of good memories for Echo, despite what happened. The sights, the sounds, the tastes — they're all still the same. He'd spent a long time on Coruscant before the Citadel happened, and he'd gotten used to it, the way the air smells, the feel of the rain against his skin. He had a whole life here. He was happy.

It's not so bad. He just... doesn't feel like going out, is all.

He knows he’s being stupid. He knows that he should be out there, enjoying what little downtime they’re afforded. Instead, he's on the ship, trying not to stare out the windows, trying to pretend that he isn't bothered by the thought of leaving, of the possibility of running into you again, however small that may be.

The worst part is that he's not sure why.

It's not that he doesn't want to see you. On the contrary, he does. More than anything. He hasn't stopped thinking about you, wondering if you're okay, if you’re happy, if you've thought of him. He's kept his ears open, and has managed to overhear a few stories here and there about you. The most recent had been about you winning a case for a group of Houk refugees who had been seeking asylum in the city, a big deal for a young lawyer to handle.

It had made him smile, a real, genuine smile, the kind he rarely got to have.

But there's something about seeing you again, about you seeing him that makes him hesitate, makes his stomach turn over and his throat tighten. Maybe it's because he doesn't want to know for certain, doesn't want to see that you're happy, that you've moved on, that you're doing well without him.

Maybe it's because he doesn't trust himself. He's different now, he knows that. He's different, and so are you. He doesn't know if he can face you, doesn't know if he'll be able to handle whatever is waiting for him. 

When he woke up in Rex’s arms and realized the galaxy had kept moving without him, he hadn’t thought much of it, solely focused on survival, on the fact that he was alive at all. He hadn't cared about what he'd missed, who he'd left behind. He hadn't known how much time had passed, and the thought that he was a dead man hadn't even crossed his mind. He hadn't thought about you, hadn't given himself the time or space to consider the consequences. You'd been the furthest thing from his mind. He'd had to keep fighting, to keep living. But once he had the time to think about it, to regret, well, it was...

It's different.

There's no other word for it. Everything is different.

Echo has had time, too much time, to think about you, to regret losing you. It's kept him up late into the night cycle, lying in bed, staring up at the ceiling, unable to sleep, thoughts running a mile a minute.

You'd been a good person, a better one than he could ever hope to be, and he had loved you, and then he had died.

Or, he had thought he'd died. Turns out he hadn't. That had been the only mercy.

You'd been the first and only person in his entire life to see him as something other than a soldier, and he'd loved you for it. You'd seen him, really seen him, and you hadn't run. He had been terrified by that, but it had also been the best feeling in the world. And he had taken advantage of it. He had let you in, he had let himself fall in love, and then he had died.

It's different, now. He's different. The galaxy's moved on, and he's a ghost, and he's scared. He doesn't know how to face you, doesn't know if he can. So when they’d made it out of Skako Minor and Rex had asked if he wanted to comm you, he’d said no. And he's been saying no every time since.

A small voice inside his head, one that sounds a lot like Fives, tells him that's bullshit.

His brother would have called him out on his cowardice, and Echo thinks that's a fair assessment. But even though he misses you and wants nothing more than to hear your voice, it's better this way. It's better if you don't see him like this, if you never find out the truth. The thought of you seeing him, of you seeing what's left of the man you knew, is too much. He can't do that to you.

It's better if you never see him again. It's better if you have closure, if you've moved on and don't think about him anymore.

You deserve more. You deserve someone who hasn't lost as much as he has, someone who you won't have to worry about, someone who will be there for you.

Someone who can give you the life you want.

Echo knows he can't do that. And maybe if he says that enough times, he'll finally believe it.

“Why are you still here?”

The sound of Tech’s voice snaps him out of his thoughts. He turns and finds his brother watching him from the doorway, an expression of vague curiosity on his face, a soldering iron twirling absently in his hand.

Echo shrugs.

Tech gives a short, impatient huff.

"That is not an answer," he says, crossing his arms and looking pointedly at Echo.

"I was just..." He trails off. Just what? Just looking out the window and moping? He sighs. "Nevermind."

Tech steps into the cockpit, looking unconvinced. Echo can tell he has a question on the tip of his tongue, can see him considering his options. Tech is not the most tactful person in the galaxy, and Echo isn't really in the mood to hear his thoughts, not when they're bound to be blunt. But instead of asking, his brother simply takes his seat beside him and begins tinkering with the dashboard, checking the systems.

The two of them are quiet for a moment, the only sound the clinking of the tools. Then Tech pauses and looks at Echo. 

Echo fidgets under his brother's gaze. "What?"

Tech doesn't respond right away, taking a second to look Echo over. His eyes flicker around the cockpit, as if the gauges and switchboards will give him some kind of clue, before coming back to his brother.

"There is nothing wrong with the ship," he says.

"Okay," Echo says, confused. "So?"

"So," Tech continues, "there is no reason for you to be here. We are scheduled to remain docked until 600 hours, and you have the day off. You could be anywhere."

Echo rolls his eyes, a prickle of annoyance flaring in his chest. "Yeah, well, I'm here, aren't I?"

"Yes, you are," Tech agrees. There's a moment where he considers something, and then he speaks again, "If I may offer a suggestion?"

"Go for it," Echo grumbles, not bothering to look at him.

"Go for a walk."

"A walk?"

"Yes. Physical activity is proven to improve mood and mental health. And you could do with the fresh air."

Echo frowns. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means," Tech says, not even pausing in his work, "that you've been spending an inordinate amount of time locked away in here."

"I'm not locked away," Echo protests.

"No, I suppose not. But you have not been yourself since we arrived."

Echo doesn't have an answer for that.

"Go for a walk," Tech repeats, and this time he does stop and turn to Echo. He leans back in his chair and removes his goggles, letting them rest on his forehead, and the intensity in his gaze makes Echo squirm a bit.

"Where?"

Tech gestures towards the open space in front of them, the sprawling metropolis. "There are a number of options available, I'm sure. There are parks, shopping districts, museums, restaurants..." He ticks the ideas off on his fingers one by one, and then points back to Echo. "Perhaps you should find out for yourself."

Echo snorts. "Thanks, but no thanks."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to," he says, the words coming out more defensively than he intended. "I'd rather just stay here."

"Yes, I can see that," Tech says dryly, and Echo gets the distinct impression that his brother is making fun of him.

He scowls.

Tech is undeterred. "But I don't think that is what you actually want to do."

Echo's mouth opens to argue, but then closes it just as quickly. He's not sure what to say, not sure if he wants to say anything. Tech isn't wrong. He doesn't really want to stay on the ship, not truly. The idea of getting out and going somewhere is tempting, and if he's being honest with himself, the last thing he wants to do is sit here, stewing in his thoughts alone. Or worse, with Tech.

And he does need to stretch his legs.

He looks out the window again, taking in the sight of the planet before him. He's not sure what's going to happen once they get the signal for the next job, if they'll ever be back. He might never have this opportunity again.

He takes a breath.

"Fine," he says, throwing his hands up in the air. "You win."

Tech's lips twitch, a barely contained smile. "As I usually do."

Echo shakes his head, a grin playing on his lips. He starts to make his way towards the door, and stops beside his brother.

"Thanks," he says, placing a hand on Tech's shoulder.

"You are welcome," Tech nods. “Try to be back by 0600 hours. If you are late, we will leave without you.

Echo snorts. "I wouldn't expect anything less."

He leaves Tech there and heads to the ramp. His steps slow as he reaches the bottom, but he forces himself forward, out into the bright sunlight and fresh air.

Echo spends the next few hours wandering around Coruscant, letting his feet guide him.

He goes wherever the crowds take him, stopping at whatever catches his interest. It's nice, being able to let his mind go blank and not have to worry about where he's going. He doesn't have to think about anything, doesn't have to consider the consequences, or the risks.

He just exists.

And it feels good.

When he eventually decides to turn back, he's a bit surprised at how far he's come. He hadn't intended to venture so deep into the city, had just wanted a walk to clear his head. But the area he's found himself in is one he recognizes.

Your apartment is nearby.

Echo can feel his pulse start to quicken, his palm begins to sweat, and he stops in the middle of the walkway.

The sun has begun to set, and the crowds are thinning. You’ll be on your way home from work soon, if you weren’t already. His brain helpfully supplies the route you would take, and his eyes flit up towards the skyline. He can't see your building, but he knows it's there, not far away.

The knowledge sits heavy in his chest.

No, he tells himself, shaking his head. I shouldn't.

He has no way of knowing if you're even home. For all he knows, you could be busy, out with friends or maybe on a date.

Don't, his mind warns him. She's moved on. You shouldn't.

He hasn't been to your apartment since the morning he left. The memory is a sharp one, a jagged knife cutting through the fog of his past. He remembers the way your bed had felt, the warmth of your body, the sound of your breathing as you slept tucked against him.

It had been so peaceful.

It had been so easy to leave.

His mind starts to replay those moments, the goodbye you had given him, and it's like a punch to the gut. He knows how much you care about him, knows that if you were to see him again, that wouldn't have changed. You wouldn't turn him away.

The night before, you talked for hours. Your conversation had been punctuated with kisses and caresses, laughter and confessions. You told him how much you wanted him to stay, how much you wished he didn't have to leave, how much you wished things could be different. You talked about what the future might hold for the two of you, and he remembers how that felt, how it made him believe, even for just a moment, that things would work out.

They didn't, of course.

But Echo is still here, and so are you, and he can't help but think that maybe, just maybe, the galaxy might be giving him a second chance.

He takes a deep breath.

There's no harm in taking a detour, he thinks.

He walks, following the familiar path, trying not to think too hard about what he's doing.

It doesn't take him long to reach the building. He hesitates in front of it, looking up at the facade. It looks just as it did the last time he was here. Same lobby, same doorman, same lift. They haven’t even fixed the panel that's been sticking, and it takes a good deal of force for him to press the button for your floor.

The doors close, and he stares at his reflection, at the dark circles under his eyes, the scruff that has accumulated on his cheeks and chin, the lines that have appeared at the corners of his eyes and across his forehead. And then his gaze wanders to the ports and implants, the reminder of what was taken from him and what he was left with. He traces the outline of one with his thumb, remembering how he used to be.

He looks tired.

What are you doing? He asks himself.

He's not sure what he's expecting, doesn't have a plan for what will happen. All he knows is that he can't get the image of you out of his head. He imagines you coming home from work, and him being there, waiting. Would you be surprised? Happy? What would you say? What would he say?

Echo sighs.

He's an idiot.

The lift dings, and the doors slide open.

Your apartment is halfway down the hall, and Echo's stomach clenches with each step he takes. He reaches it and stands outside for a minute, running his fingers over the metal door, staring at the numbers painted on the surface.

It's just a door, he tells himself. Nothing special. Just a door.

His hand moves on its own, hovering over the bell. He waits, listens. There's no sound coming from inside, no music, no voices. Maybe you're not home yet.

Or maybe you're out. Maybe you're not alone.

He rings the bell and holds his breath, counting the seconds.

One. Two. Three. Four.

Nothing.

Echo rings again, this time holding the button down for a few extra seconds, listening for any sign of movement.

There's nothing.

The knot in his stomach tightens, and he releases the button, letting out the breath he'd been holding. He runs a hand over his face, feeling the heat of his skin through his glove. He's sweating.

Well, that's it, then.

He'd thought he was prepared for this possibility, but hearing the silence behind the door and knowing that you aren't home has shaken him more than he anticipated.

Maybe this is for the best, he thinks. It's better this way. Safer.

But the disappointment is palpable.

He's not sure what to do. He considers waiting a little longer, just to make sure, but the more he thinks about it, the more stupid it seems. He doesn't belong here anymore. He shouldn't be here, standing outside your door, hoping for something that won't happen.

He needs to go.

As Echo turns away from the door, a voice calls out behind him.

"Can I help you?"

For half a second, he's sure he imagined it, sure that it's just his brain playing tricks on him, taunting him. But then the voice speaks again.

"Are you looking for someone?"

Echo spins around, heart leaping into his throat, and there you are.

Standing there, a few paces away, is the woman he's been dreaming about, the one he's thought about every day, the one he's missed so much that it hurts.

Your hair is different, longer than he's ever seen it, pulled away from your face. You're wearing a dress, something he's only seen a handful of times, and your makeup is impeccable, but he can still see the hint of tiredness behind your eyes. He wonders how many hours you've put in at work this week, how much you've had to fight for your clients.

But the most noticeable change is that you're looking at him. Your datapad is held loosely in your hands, a bag of groceries on your hip, and you’re staring at him, your brow furrowed in confusion.

He doesn’t blame you.

This is a strange situation, and you must be wondering who the hell is standing in front of you, why they rang your bell and then walked away.

"Um," Echo says, suddenly aware that he hasn't spoken. He clears his throat, trying to gather his wits. He didn't think this through. "Hi."

You blink, clearly not expecting that response.

"Hi," you reply, warily.

Echo tries to say something, but the words won't come.

He's frozen in place, staring at you, unable to do anything except take in your appearance, drinking in the sight of you. He didn't realize how much he needed to see you until now, and the relief he feels is overwhelming.

"Do I..." You trail off, studying him carefully. "Do I know you?"

He feels his heart break, just a little.

You don't recognize him. Of course, you wouldn't. It's been so long, and he's not the same man you knew. His face is one of thousands, identical and interchangeable. He doesn't even look like a clone anymore, not really. He's more machine than man, now, and he has no idea how he expected you to see him.

"Yeah," he manages to say, his voice hoarse. "Yeah, you do."

You raise your eyebrows, waiting. When he doesn't say anything else, you take a step towards him, squinting a little. He can feel the tension in his body, can sense your scrutiny. It's not comfortable, but it's not unpleasant, either.

"Sorry," you say, sounding frustrated, "I can't quite —"

You stop, your eyes widening, and Echo can see the exact moment it clicks.

"Oh," you gasp, covering your mouth with a shaking hand. The motion makes the paper bag of groceries on your arm start to slip, and Echo rushes forward to catch it, placing it on the floor by your feet. He stands up, and he can feel your eyes on him, can see the tears beginning to well up, can hear your breathing quicken.

He waits.

"Echo?" Your voice is soft, tentative, like you're not sure if he's real or not. Like he's some kind of ghost. He's not sure that's not what he is.

"Hey, cyar'ika," he says. His voice cracks, and he clears his throat again.

A small, incredulous laugh escapes you.

"Hi," you breathe. You cover your mouth again, trying to stifle the sob that rises from your chest. "I —" 

You let out a shaky breath, and then another, and then all of a sudden, you're crying, tears streaming down your face. Your hands come up to wipe them away, but more keep falling, and Echo is overwhelmed with the desire to hold you, to take away the pain and the sadness, to make everything right. But he doesn't know if he's allowed, doesn't know if it would be welcome. So instead, he just stands there, helpless.

"I'm sorry," you hiccup, wiping your face with the back of your hand. "I can't believe it's you."

He smiles at that, his own eyes burning. "It's me," he confirms. "I'm here."

You're shaking your head, your eyes never leaving his face, as if you're afraid that he might disappear if you look away. He doesn't blame you, and he does his best to stay as still as possible. The last thing he wants is to scare you, or make you think he's going to leave. Not when he just got here.

"I thought..." You start, and then trail off.

"I know."

You swallow hard, taking a moment to compose yourself. "I thought you were dead."

Echo winces. He's heard those words from a lot of people, but coming from you, they hurt. "Yeah, I, uh... I thought so, too, for a while."

He sees the look of horror that crosses your face, the way your eyes grow wet again, and he wishes he hadn't said it.

"How... How long have you been back?" you ask. Your voice is quiet, strained, and Echo can hear the question underneath, the one you're afraid to ask. The one that makes his stomach twist into knots.

"Not long," he answers, trying to keep his tone even, light. "Only a couple months, really."

"Months?" you repeat, incredulous. "You've been back for months?"

Echo shifts uncomfortably and nods. "Yeah."

You stare at him, your mouth opening and closing as you search for words. "And... And you didn't comm me?"

"I, uh... No."

You let out a sharp exhale and turn away, bringing your hands to your face, and he can see that you're starting to shake again. You're silent for a moment, and he can feel his heart pounding, can feel the blood rushing in his ears. His stomach churns, and he feels like he's going to be sick.

"Why?" Your voice is tight, controlled. It's the same voice you use when you're working, the one you use to keep yourself calm, to keep yourself from getting angry.

"I just... I wasn't..." Echo trails off, not sure what to say. I wasn't sure if I was coming back? That's true, but not the whole truth. I wasn't sure you'd want to see me? Also true, but also not the full answer. I wasn't sure I was worth it? Yeah, that's the one.

But he can't say it.

He doesn't know if it's fear or guilt or shame, but whatever it is, it keeps the words stuck in his throat. You're waiting for an answer, and he's not sure he has one.

"Echo," you say, your voice a warning. You turn to face him again, and he can see the hurt and frustration in your eyes. He wants to hold you, wants to apologize, wants to take it all back. But he doesn't move. He can't.

"Why?" you repeat, more forcefully this time.

"I didn't want to bother you," he says. It's the best answer he can come up with, and the worst part is that it's also true. At least, that's what he tells himself.

But the moment the words leave his mouth, he knows it's the wrong thing to say. You stiffen, and then your jaw tightens. He can tell that you're barely holding it together, and he wants to say something, to explain, but he doesn't get the chance.

"You didn't want to bother me," you repeat, and Echo can hear the anger in your voice, can feel the sting of it. "I'm sorry, did I not make it clear how much I care about you?"

"No, you did," Echo says, backtracking, trying to placate you. "You did, I promise."

"Then please explain how you thought keeping me in the dark about the fact that the man I love was still alive and well was not a bother."

The word "love" hits him like a punch to the gut.

You love him. You still love him. You're still here, and you're still loving him, even after everything. He doesn't understand, doesn't know why. Doesn't know how. But he doesn't have time to think about it, not with the way you're looking at him, the hurt and confusion clear on your face.

"That's not what I meant," he says, his voice low, pleading. "It's not that. I promise."

You let out a shaky sigh, crossing your arms over your chest. "What's the difference, then?"

Echo opens his mouth, and then closes it again, not knowing what to say.

"I mourned you," you say. Your voice is soft, almost a whisper, but it sounds loud in the silence between the two of you. "I loved you, and I mourned you, and I was doing okay, and then you just show up, and act like it's no big deal, like I didn't spend weeks, months waiting for you to come back, hoping you'd come back, and..."

Your voice cracks, and a fresh wave of tears begins to roll down your cheeks. Echo reaches out to brush them away, and you flinch. The motion stings, but he doesn't say anything, doesn't push it. He lets his hand drop to his side.

"I'm sorry," he says. "I didn't... I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Yeah, well, you did," you say, sniffling.

The words hit him harder than he expects, and he feels his throat tighten.

"I didn't know what to say," he admits, his voice breaking. "I didn't know what to do."

"Why not?" you ask, and your anger has softened, turning into something else. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No!" Echo says quickly. "Of course not. You were perfect. You were... You were amazing."

You look at him, and there's a vulnerability in your eyes that makes him want to gather you in his arms and never let go. He thinks maybe he should. But before he can, you speak.

"So what happened?" you ask. Your voice is quiet, but Echo can hear the desperation, the need for an answer. "Where were you? Why didn't you come back?"

“I—“ Echo looks around, suddenly aware of the hallway and the closed doors surrounding him, closing in on him. The space is too small, the walls are too close, the air is too thick. He feels trapped, like the world is closing in around him, and he takes a step back.

"Can we... Can we not do this out here?" he asks, trying not to let his voice betray his panic.

You study him for a moment, considering. He doesn't blame you. After all, he'd shown up out of the blue, and you had every right to be suspicious. You're still crying, but there's a steeliness in your gaze, and he can tell you're weighing your options, deciding if he's worth it or not. His heart hammers against his ribs as he waits, praying that you'll give him a chance.

Finally, you let out a sigh and nod.

"Yeah," you say, "sure."

You bend down to pick up the groceries, and Echo rushes forward, scooping them up before you can. You look at him, surprised.

"Let me help," he says. "Please."

You hesitate, and Echo can see the worry on your face, but then you nod, fumbling for the keypad. The lock clicks open, and you push the door open, motioning for him to go ahead.

He steps inside, and the familiar scent of your apartment hits him hard. He hadn't realized how much he'd missed it, how much he'd come to associate it with safety and comfort. It makes his chest ache, and he takes a moment to steady himself, willing the tears to stop.

Your apartment is the same, and yet so different.

It's still cozy, but there's a coldness to the air, a lack of warmth. The curtains are closed, and the room is dark, the only light coming from the dim bulb above the stove in the kitchen. There are dishes stacked in the sink, and a few pieces of dirty laundry have been discarded on the couch. The floor is littered with shoes and other miscellaneous items, as if someone came home and kicked everything off their feet, leaving it all in a pile. Echo’s brow furrows at the mess, and he wonders when you started to let the place get this way.

"I'm sorry," you say, sounding embarrassed. You take the bag of groceries from him, your cheeks flushed. "I wasn't expecting company."

"Don't worry about it," he assures you.

"Here, let me..." You trail off, disappearing down the hall, and a moment later, he hears a door slam shut.

Echo stands there, unsure of what to do. His gaze wanders around the room, taking everything in, trying to find something to occupy himself with. It feels like years since he's been here, and the sensation is both comforting and strange. He remembers the nights he spent curled up next to you on the couch, the quiet mornings in the kitchen, the lazy afternoons spent in bed.

He shakes his head, trying to focus on the present.

You're back now, and he needs to concentrate.

He takes a seat at the kitchen table, drumming his fingers against the wood.

It's quiet, but Echo can hear you moving around, and he wonders if you're trying to clean up, trying to make the place a little more presentable. He doesn't care about any of that. He cares about you.

And he doesn't know what to say.

He runs his hand over his face, pressing the heel of his palm into his eye, trying to think. He's rehearsed this moment in his head, has imagined all the different ways it could go.

And now that it's actually happening, he can't remember a single one.

He's such an idiot.

The minutes pass, and you finally return. He hears you enter the room, the soft sound of your footsteps, but he can't bring himself to look up. Not yet.

"Echo," you say, and he can hear the hesitation in your voice. "What happened?"

"I don't know where to start," he confesses, dropping his hand and glancing up at you.

You've changed into something more comfortable, a pair of sweatpants and your favorite sweater, and your face is scrubbed clean, makeup-free. It's nice to see you this way, a reminder of the times you shared together, and the sight makes him smile.

"Why are you smiling?"

"Nothing, it's just..." He pauses, his eyes wandering over you. "I forgot how you looked in sweatpants."

You roll your eyes, but there's a hint of amusement on your face. "Seriously? You're sitting here, after being missing for months, and you're making fun of my fashion choices?"

"I'm not making fun of you," he says, chuckling. The pressure in his chest eases slightly, and he takes a breath. "I just meant that I missed seeing you this way."

You let out a quiet, disbelieving laugh, and then shake your head.

"You're unbelievable," you mutter.

Echo smiles, and for a moment, he feels normal. As if the last year never happened, and this was just a day like any other. As if he'd just come home from a mission, and you'd greet him with a kiss, and everything would be fine.

But then you sigh, and the moment is over.

"Look, I get that this is... Well, I'm sure this isn't what you were expecting," you say. You move to sit across from him, leaning your elbows on the table and resting your chin in your hands. "But we can't keep pretending like nothing happened. You have to talk to me."

Echo stares at you, his eyes taking in the familiar lines of your face, the curve of your lips, the color of your eyes. They aren’t as bright as he remembered, not as full of life, and the realization breaks his heart. This isn't how it's supposed to be.

"Okay," he begins, clearing his throat. "So, uh, this is going to be a lot."

"That's okay," you say gently. You give him a reassuring nod, and Echo feels a swell of gratitude for you. "Just... Start at the beginning, and we'll go from there."

"Right, the beginning." Echo nods, trying to organize his thoughts, and then he starts to speak.

He tells you everything, from the moment the explosion happened, to the moment he woke up and found himself in Rex's arms, everything in between. He tells you about his injuries, the surgeries, the physical therapy. He tells you about his time with the Batch, his newfound abilities, the things he's been able to do, the things he's learned. He talks about the missions, the jobs, the danger they've faced, and the risks they've taken. He tells you about the planets, the people, the experiences. He tries to leave nothing out, even the hard parts. The loss, the pain, the fear. He doesn't want to spare you any of it.

You sit there and listen, asking questions when necessary, but mostly staying silent. And when he's done, he sits there, feeling a strange sense of relief. He hadn't realized how much he needed to talk about everything, how much he'd been holding in. And he hadn't realized how good it would feel to tell you. To have someone who cared, someone he trusted, who knew him better than anyone.

When the words run out, and the room is silent, you let out a long, slow exhale. You sit there, your hands folded together, your gaze fixed on the tabletop, and Echo waits, not sure what to expect. But the longer the silence drags on, the more worried he gets.

"Cyar'ika?" he asks, his voice hesitant.

You take a breath and look up at him, and Echo is startled to see that your eyes are glassy, and there are fresh tear tracks running down your cheeks.

"Sorry," you apologize, wiping at them with your sleeve. "I'm not — I just..."

You take another breath, and then let it out, composing yourself. "Thank you," you say. "For telling me. I know that can't have been easy."

"It wasn't," Echo admits, and his throat tightens a little. "But I'm glad I did."

You offer him a small smile, but it doesn’t reach your eyes. You look like you’re far away, lost in your own thoughts, and Echo has a feeling you're not fully present, not in the moment. And he doesn't blame you. His words can't have been easy to hear.

"Is there anything else you want to know?" he asks, trying to break the silence.

You glance at him, your eyes focusing, and then look away, your jaw clenching. Echo can see the emotion on your face, can tell that you're struggling to stay calm, to hold it together. You've always been good at that, he thinks.

"I just..." You pause, taking a shaky breath, and Echo can see the tears forming in your eyes again. "I just don't understand."

He frowns, confused. "What do you mean?"

You close your eyes, taking a moment to collect yourself. Then, you stand up and begin pacing around the kitchen, your hands clasped behind your back. You move slowly, deliberately, your gaze fixed on the floor, like you're trying to make sense of something, figure something out. 

Echo watches you, feeling uneasy. You're not giving anything away, and the silence is starting to get to him. He's never seen you in the courtroom, but he imagines this is the stance you take when you're interrogating a witness. 

It's effective.

"Can you say something, please?" he asks. He knows he sounds desperate, but he doesn't care.

"I'm thinking," you say, and Echo bites his lip.

He feels like he's going to crawl out of his skin. He wants to get up, to follow you around the room, try to coax a response out of you. He wants to make this better, to make this right. But he knows that pushing you won't help, so he stays seated, trying to keep his patience.

 You continue to pace, your expression blank, and the seconds tick by, the only sound the muffled noises of the city outside. It feels like an eternity has passed when you finally stop, standing in front of him, your arms crossed.

"I can't believe you thought I wouldn't want to see you," you say. Your voice is low, almost a whisper, and there's an edge to it that Echo doesn't recognize. It's not anger, not exactly. It's something else, something deeper.

"I know," he replies, his voice just as quiet.

"I thought you were dead," you say, the words coming out in a rush. "I grieved you. I mourned you. And then you show up, and you're... You're alive, and you're here, and you think the best thing to do is to leave me alone?"

"I didn't know what would happen," Echo explains, trying to keep his tone calm. "I wasn't sure if I was coming back, and I didn't want to —"

"No," you say sharply, cutting him off. "That's not an excuse. That's bullshit, and you know it."

Echo swallows, and nods, not sure what to say.

"We made promises," you continue, and Echo can hear the anger in your voice, can see the frustration on your face. "To each other. We talked about our future, we said things that... We made things that were real, and then you just decided it was too much, and you walked away. What the hell is that?"

"I'm sorry," Echo says around the lump forming in his throat. "I shouldn't have —"

"No," you interrupt, your eyes burning. "You shouldn't have."

Echo looks at you, and he feels like he's going to shatter. You’re staring at him with such intensity, and there's an anger in your gaze that he hasn't seen before. It's so different from the gentle look you usually give him, and it makes him ache.

"I didn't mean to hurt you," he says. "I swear, I didn't."

"Then why did you?" you ask, and there's a note of pleading in your voice. “I spent so long wondering, worrying, and you just... You didn't care."

"Of course I did," he argues. "It wasn't about that."

"Then what was it about, Echo?" you demand. "What was so important that you thought you couldn't tell me? That you couldn't comm me, or send a message, or do anything that would have let me know you were alive? That would have told me you were okay?"

"I didn't think —"

"What, that I'd care? That I'd worry? That I'd miss you? That I'd wonder where you were, and if you were okay, and what the hell happened to you?" you say, your voice rising.

Echo can feel the frustration building inside him, and he knows he shouldn't respond, knows that getting angry won't help, but the words tumble out before he can stop them. "I'm sorry," he snaps. "I wasn't exactly thinking clearly."

"That's not an excuse," you snap back, and Echo blinks, shocked. You're the most level-headed person he's ever met, and he's never heard you yell before.

"Yeah, well, it's the best one I've got," he says.

"Echo, I loved you," you say, and the past tense stings. "When Fives told me what happened to you, I —" Your voice catches, and the fight goes out of him. He can see the pain on your face, the hurt in your eyes, and he can't help but feel responsible. "I can't even describe it. It felt like my whole world was ending. And I don’t blame you for doing your duty, but I do blame you for not coming back to me."

"I know," he whispers. "I'm sorry. I really am."

You shake your head, turning away from him. "Why didn't you comm me?"

Echo hesitates. He doesn't want to admit his fears, his worries, the insecurities that have plagued him. He doesn't want to tell you how much he doubted, how much he doubted you. It feels too vulnerable, too raw. And it would only make you feel worse. But the longer the silence stretches, the more you deserve the truth. And he can't avoid it forever.

"I didn't think I was worth it," he says, his voice low. He can feel the heat in his cheeks, the sting of embarrassment. He can't look at you, doesn't want to see the pity, the disappointment, the anger. "I didn't think I was worth it."

You turn to face him, your expression softening.

"You were all I had left," he says. He feels exposed, and it's not a comfortable feeling, but he can't stop now. Not with the way you're looking at him. Not when he's so close to fixing this, to getting you back. "After everything that happened, I just... I couldn't bring myself to do it. I didn't think you'd want to see me."

"You really thought I'd just leave you?"

Echo can hear the hurt in your voice, and he's surprised at the sharpness of it. He expected to be met with some amount of anger, but he didn't expect it to cut so deep. He didn't think his insecurities would upset you so much. He's used to it, by now. After everything he's been through, the doubts and worries have become a constant, an almost comforting presence. But you were never supposed to know about them.

"It's not that," he says. "I know you wouldn't have left me. It's just... I didn't want to drag you down with me."

"That's stupid," you reply. There's no malice in your voice, but there's no sympathy, either. "What makes you think I couldn't handle it?"

"It's not about what you could handle," Echo says. "You didn't sign up for this. You didn't sign up for any of it."

"I signed up for you," you argue, and Echo is startled by the fierceness of your tone.

"And look at what that got you."

You fall silent, and Echo regrets the words the second they leave his mouth. He's always known he wasn't good enough for you, but it's different to actually say it out loud. It makes it real. And he's not sure he's ready for that. But you're looking at him like you can't believe he said it, and the disappointment in your eyes makes him feel even worse. 

Your eyes rove over him, taking in the scarring, the metal implants, the ports and wires, the armor. You look like you’re seeing him for the first time, and the disgust and fear he’d thought might appear are nowhere to be found, just a profound sense of sadness and resignation.

"Oh, Echo," you breathe. The words are quiet, but they feel like a slap, and he has to look away, not wanting to meet your gaze.

"I'm not the man you knew," he says. He sounds defeated, even to his own ears. His eyes are burning, and he has to fight to keep the tears from falling. He hates how weak he feels, how small, how vulnerable. "I can't be. I'm... I'm not him anymore."

"Yes, you are," you insist. You reach out and take his hand, squeezing gently, and the sensation makes him jump. He'd almost forgotten how warm you are, how soft. How safe. He wants to hold on, to pull you close, to never let go. "You're still the same man, the same Echo, I just..."

"What?" he asks, when you trail off. "You just what?"

You sigh, dropping his hand and running your fingers through your hair, tugging lightly. The familiar gesture makes him ache. "I don't know, Echo," you admit. "I'm... I'm sad. And I'm angry. But I'm mostly just... Confused."

"Confused about what?"

"I'm confused as to why you didn't come back to me," you say. "I'm confused as to why you thought I'd want anything else."

"I thought you deserved better," he says, the words sounding hollow, even to his own ears. "I thought you deserved someone who was whole, who could give you a normal life, who didn't have a hundred years of baggage and trauma to deal with. And I was terrified that you already had that."

"Had what?"

"A normal life," he answers. "Without me. And the more I thought about it, the more I convinced myself it was true."

"It's not," you say. Your voice is quiet, but firm, and Echo looks at you, searching for any trace of doubt, of hesitation, of insincerity. But all he finds is determination, and it makes his heart clench. The intensity in your gaze is too much, and he has to look away. His eyes trail over the walls, the ceiling, the floor, lingering on the groceries on the table, the dishes in the sink, the empty bottles of wine shoved into the trash, the pile of laundry on the couch. There’s a dent in the wall that wasn't there the last time he was here, and the carpet is worn. He wonders when that happened.

He feels a tug on his arm, and then you're reaching up to cup his face, your hands soft and warm. You turn his head to face you, your thumb stroking his cheek. The touch is gentle, comforting, and Echo can't stop the sigh that escapes him. It's been so long since someone touched him like this, and it's nice. It's more than nice. It's familiar. It's safe. It's home.

"I only wanted you," you whisper.

"Even after everything?" he asks. He doesn't mean to sound so incredulous, but he can't help it. He's spent so long convincing himself that you were better off without him, and now, hearing you say the opposite, hearing you say the words he'd only ever hoped for, the ones he'd tried to convince himself were true... It's a lot to take in.

"Even after everything," you affirm.

"You could have had anyone," he says. "Why me?"

"Because I love you," you answer, as if it's the simplest thing in the galaxy. As if it's the most obvious thing in the universe. "And I don't want anyone else."

"Cyar'ika..." His voice cracks, and the tears are falling freely now. You wipe them away, and the touch makes his chest ache.

"I've never stopped loving you, Echo," you say. Your voice is barely audible, but Echo hears it. And it's the best sound he's ever heard. "And I don't plan on stopping now."

"I'm sorry," he says. "I'm sorry I left you, and I'm sorry I didn't comm you, and I'm sorry I was such a coward, and I'm —"

"Shh," you murmur, cutting him off. "I forgive you."

Echo can't speak. He's not sure he can move, can't even breathe. The relief is overwhelming, and it threatens to knock him off his feet. His chest tightens, and the tears won't stop falling, and he doesn't know what to do. He's missed you so much, has regretted leaving every single day, and now that you're here, now that he has you back, he can't find the words to express how grateful he is, how relieved, how happy.

"You really thought I was going to leave you?" you ask, and Echo can hear the note of humor in your voice, can see the ghost of a smile on your face. It's reassuring, and he lets himself smile, too.

"Honestly? Yes," he admits.

"Never," you reply.

Echo leans down and rests his forehead against yours, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. You move your hands down his face, brushing the tears away with your thumbs, before bringing them around his neck, wrapping your arms around him. He moves to do the same, pulling you closer and wrapping his arms around your waist. You let out a quiet gasp of surprise, and Echo chuckles, holding you tighter.

"I missed you," he whispers, and it feels good to say the words out loud. "So much."

"I missed you, too," you say, your breath warm against his neck. You tilt your head and press a kiss against his throat, and Echo feels his heart stutter. "More than I can say."

Echo hums and pulls away, bringing his hand up to brush the hair away from your face. Your skin is warm, and soft, and he leans in and presses a kiss against your forehead, savoring the contact. You sigh, and he can't resist the urge to kiss you again, this time on the cheek.

"Echo," you murmur, letting out a shaky breath.

He kisses the corner of your mouth, and then your jaw, and your grip on his neck tightens, your fingers digging into the fabric of his blacks. He moves down your throat, trailing kisses along the column of your neck, and you gasp.

"I missed you, too," he murmurs, and you laugh.

"Yeah, I got that," you say. "Now, will you please kiss me?"

Echo smiles and obliges.

The kiss is soft and sweet, and it tastes like home. He cups the back of your neck, his scomp moving to rest on your hip, and you let out a pleased noise, your hands sliding down to his shoulders. The warmth of your mouth, the way your lips part, the little gasps and sighs you make, it all makes him want to get closer, to be nearer.

You break the kiss, and Echo lets out a quiet whimper. You chuckle and rest your head on his shoulder, and Echo brings his hand up to stroke your hair, his fingers combing through the strands. You sigh and lean into his touch, and he can't help the contented smile that spreads across his face.

"I'm glad you're here," you murmur. "I'm glad you came back."

"Me, too," he says. He tilts your head up and presses a kiss to your temple, his lips lingering. You close your eyes and nuzzle his neck, and Echo sighs, holding you close. It feels so good to have you in his arms again, to be able to hold you, and he wishes he could stay here forever. But the reality of the situation catches up with him, and he can't help the wave of guilt that washes over him.

"I'm sorry, Cyar'ika," he says.

You frown, and pull away slightly. "What are you apologizing for?"

"I didn't think this through," he admits. "I... I didn't know what was going to happen, and now..." He pauses, letting out a frustrated sigh. "I just... I'm sorry. I’m leaving soon, and I know it's going to be hard, and I know you're going to have to say goodbye again, and I'm —"

"Echo," you interrupt, and your voice is firm. You put your hand on his chest, and he can feel the heat of it, even through the layers of armor and clothing. "I know what I signed up for. I'm not expecting anything different."

"But —"

"No," you cut him off. "No buts. I knew what this was, Echo. And I still want it."

"But you shouldn't have to," Echo argues. "I don't want to put you through that."

"Well, it's a little late for that," you reply. Your tone is sharp, and Echo winces. "Look, Echo. I know the situation isn't ideal, but I'm not going to walk away because it's hard. And I'm not going to stop caring just because it hurts." You look at him, and the determination in your gaze makes his heart skip a beat. "You're worth it, okay? No matter what."

"Cyar'ika —"

"No," you say, shaking your head. "You're not changing my mind. You can try, but it's not going to work. So don't waste your time." You give him a stern look, and then your face softens. "Okay?"

"Okay," Echo agrees. He knows it's futile to argue. He's never been able to say no to you. Not when it matters. "I'm still sorry, though."

You roll your eyes, and then stand on your toes and give him a quick kiss. "You're lucky I love you," you say, and the words make him feel lighter.

"Yeah, I am," he agrees, grinning.

"So, what now?" you ask.

Echo shrugs, suddenly feeling overwhelmed. He's been so focused on finding you, on convincing you to forgive him, on making things right, that he hasn't thought about what comes next. The prospect of it is both exhilarating and terrifying, and he doesn't know where to start. There's so much to do, and so little time. And he doesn't want to waste another second.

"Do you want to stay?" you offer.

"Stay?"

"Here," you clarify. "For a while. I don't know how long you can, but..." You pause, a flush spreading across your cheeks. “I was going to make dinner. If you wanted to stay."

"Dinner?" Echo repeats, and he can't hide the excitement in his voice. The idea of a home-cooked meal is so far removed from his life now, so distant, that the thought of it almost makes him lightheaded. "Really?"

You laugh, and the sound fills him with warmth. "Yes, Echo. Really."

"What are you making?" he asks. The question sounds childish, and he can't believe how eager he is, how excited.

"Just a simple dish," you say. You move towards the counter and begin putting the groceries away, and Echo follows you, a smile spreading across his face. While you tell him about the recipe, he moves toward your sink, picking up a dish and turning the water on. You look over at him, and the fondness in your eyes makes him blush. "You don't have to do that, Echo."

"I know," he replies. "I want to."

"Well, alright then."

The two of you work together, talking and laughing as you wash the dishes and prepare the food. Echo feels lighter than he has in months, and it's a relief to be here with you, to have something normal and familiar to do. Something so domestic, so ordinary, and yet, so special.

He wants to remember this.

When the food is ready, you gesture to the table, and Echo takes a seat. You sit across from him, and for a moment, the two of you just look at each other. He's missed you, missed this. Missed being here, missed having someone who knew him, someone he could trust. Someone he could love.

You're both quiet, and Echo can see the wheels turning in your head, can see the way your eyes dart over him, taking everything in. You're cataloging, committing him to memory too. The realization hits him, and his chest tightens. He'll be leaving soon, and you're doing what you can to make sure you won't forget him. It's a sobering thought, and he's not sure how to handle it.

"Hey," you say, and Echo looks up, meeting your gaze. "It's okay. We'll be fine."

"How did you know?" he asks, startled.

You shrug. "It's written all over your face."

"I'm sorry," he murmurs. "I wish I could stay."

"It's okay," you repeat. “We have the night, and that’s more than enough. For now, let's just enjoy the time we have."

Echo nods.

You're right.

You always are.

You smile, and it's so beautiful, so genuine, that it takes his breath away. You reach across the table and take his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. He squeezes back, and you lean forward, resting your elbows on the table and putting your chin in your hand. The way you're looking at him, the affection in your eyes, it makes him feel like he's the only thing that matters, like he’s home.

And, right now, he is.

He's missed this.

He's missed you.

And as the two of you sit there, enjoying each other's company, Echo knows he's made the right choice. He knows that coming back was worth it, that finding you, fixing things, making things right, it's all been worth it. And he knows that, no matter what, he'll be back.

He'll find his way back to you.

Taglist: @baddest-batchers @covert1ntrovert @stellarbit @bruh-myguy-what @qvnthesia

@spicy-clones @kindalonleystars @cw80831 @totallyunidentified @heidnspeak

@lovelytech9902 @frozenreptile @chocolatewastelandtriumph @etod @puppetscenario

@umekohiganbana @resistantecho @dindjarins1ut @tech-aficionado @aynavaano

@burningnerdchild @ihatesaaand @lolwey @hobbititties @mere-bear

@thegreatpipster @lordofthenerds97 @tentakelspektakel @notslaybabes @mali-777

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@marchingviolinist @deerspringdreams

[aboringredmop]

k still don't know how im gonna post the videos (YouTube? unlisted?someone please help) but I can't sleep so I thought it'd write down whatever I remember happening!

(edit: here's the full recording! )

Becky and Joe walked on stage wearing sunglasses and red leather jackets and threw 3 of the trio plushies into the crowd. didn't get one unfortunately but it's really cool some people got free plushies :)

they made this robot child called the Inspiration Child, who's clearly meant to be a nod to ai (can learn from our show and generate it's own content!)

they explained how they met (and had some dodgy animated retelling), and how they started with small projects like commercials and music videos, until they came up with designs of the trio (and a mysterious fourth fella)

they made the designs first, then made the set, then the song and finally wrote the script for creativity. red guy was just a red mop head with legs at first ("alien squid thing") but Joe put the red guy head on for shits and giggles once and Becky thought it was hilarious so they kept it in the show

they were really not expecting it to blow up, and when Sundance called because they wanted to show creativity Becky thought it was a scam caller lol

they talked about the kickstarter and the credit card fraud kid. the mailed him saying "hey maybe dont do that" but the kid didnt know how to undo it cuz he just found a website full of credit card information and went ham, so Becky and Joe had to contact kickstarter because people were pulling out of the funding because they thought the project was overfunded (kickstarter was very difficult to contact)

they also made (lighthearted) fun of nsfw fluffybird art ((no padlock 😔) "using OUR characters to act out their SICK FANTASIES" - Becky) and theorists, especially because most if not all of the webseries is just them fucking around.

Inspiration Child also says something along the lines of "wow what a cool show with a great message of how corrupt the media is. I hate the media!"

Becky and Joe had these rules to make the show as vague as possible (no pop culture references, no names, no swearing and way too much detail put into small things)(the duck guy drag queen absolutely obliterates the no swearing rule lol)

they talk about the pilot, how they focused too much on the story because they felt like they had to due to it being on the big screen now, and how it ended up ruining the atmosphere and such of the pilot. they did show the entire thing sped up but my phone sucks ass so I could not get it to focus correctly. I'll see what I can salvage so you people can dissect frames of your blorbo you're Legally Not Allowed To See (which is also the official reason we don't get the pilot)

also pilot concept art showed that Mean Steve is in fact just called Key

they showed a whole post-it wall full of ideas for the tv show. don't know how much I got on footage, but what stood out most to me were 2 episodes called Money and Christmas. Joe mentioned "clock in a wheelchair" specifically

also really fun fact. Becky made the Lesley suit during covid, and pretty much threatened Baker into writing a human character into the show to wear it. concept art also shows Lesley with a mask made out of the same fabric, don't know if this was part of the original suit tho

they showed Warrens old models (?). he was gonna be a wayy more ugly looking silicone pug-worm thing y'all got lucky with the bald fuck

lily and todney were directly based off of some cancelled show about two porcelain doll children with panda parents. do not for the life of me remember what it was called but Becky and Joe were very enthousiastic about it (UPDATE: Candy and Andy!)

international release of the show soon!

Inspiration Child talks about what he's learned and sings a little song, then generates his own dhmis inspired content of a cult meeting in a forest at night. the dhmis Discord server called this "potential new content" but I doubt it

3 cultists walk on stage, face the screen backs to the crowd, drop their cloaks and boom! drag queens!!!

they were not mentioned on the site or during earlier parts of the show at all so they were a complete surprise. I asked Becky about it later during the night and she said she really wanted them there, so she asked and they were excited to! hope this means more official content with them soon I love them

they dance to There's Three Of Us, then Duck lipsings the shredder song which turns into a techno remix while Red and Yellow dance during the background

then Duck and Yellow make out while Red tries to undress to the instrumentals of the Fucked Up Part of Creativity but can't get out of his suit on time before the song ends

the drag queens, Becky and Joe and the Inspiration Child walk around during the meet and greet later and I got signatures from all of them! except inspiration child he didn't have thumbs

the drag queens were so fucking funny. Duck adopted inspiration child and loudly yelled at everyone to "GET AWAY FROM MY FUCKING CHILD" (their duck voice is sooo good). yellow stood in a corner staring at a wall for like 10 minutes and red was constantly awkwardly hovering just outside the frames of pictures (and also could not see shit lmao)

Becky liked my shirt! (the one with the melting trio heads) said she handdrew it

I'll post the signatures and some more stuff tomorrow because it is. 5 am

edit Heres the signatures! yellow guys is Italian I think? and means hi I love you :)

(the liyskaen is duck trying to spell my name. they got pretty close)

[rileyclaw]

Hii! First off i just want to I'm such a big fan of your art and animatics! Your art is just so expressive and unique its addicting to look at 💞💞

I was wondering if you could go over how your process or tutorial in making an animatic? Whenever I try to start to make one, I get jumbled up and end up ditching it lol

I'm sorry if you get this question a lot 😭

So sorry it took me so long to answer this- I was in a Busy time (diseaseridden with covid and being punched by finals) when I got the ask and wanted to answer it with some stuff Im using for my next TOH animatic!!

I'll say one thing first: I get jumbled up and ditch so many animatics. For every one animatic I release, there are three to five more I have that have NEVER seen the light of day (yet). And that's okay!! It's fun just to make them for me, and I hope it is for you too!! Animatics are scary because if you're working on it alone, it can be really hard to be your own cheerleader to keep up the mojo to keep going. So that makes it really special when there is that project that makes it to the finish line- cuz you can look at it and go "holy crap I made this. holy crap i MADE that look how SICK that is dude!! all that work and look at the turnout!!"

The following stuffh is just my personal process and is by no means representative of a professional animation pipeline, but this works for me as a Lonely Artist! It all begins with the idea - whether it's a song, or just a story you wanna tell. In the case of the one I'm gonna demo here with , I wanted to animate Hunter's first day as Del's apprentice!

The first thing I did was write a script. Not fancy or AO3-quality, but enough that I understand the pacing and the visuals of each shot. I usually just put this in a doc or put it in a script format, if I feel fancy.

Then, I take that script and find music that I think would fit for it- and remix it (if needed) to fit the pacing/mood/etc! This is what this new animatic looked like before I began ANY artwork- this is a me thing because I'm super inspired by audio as opposed to visuals first. But you might be different- this is just how I like working personally!

Then begins the research! I find references for characters, background layouts, and create a style guide for the animatic that tells me how thick lines will be for characters, backgrounds, if there'll be tons of value or no. I make a turnaround for each character so I can refer to them because Im gonna be drawing them over and over a LOT and want to be consistent! Luckily TOH has no shortage of references, so I based my work off them.

THEN, I can begin drawing. I'm a little,,, (a lot) ADHD and may not always do this process, but if you're new to animatics or daunted by the task at hand, make beat boards of the entire project.

This is just a page of rough thumbnails that get your visual idea down - look how rough and quick these are!! I try not to spend over a minute on each beat board if I dont have to, unless it's a particularly complex shot.

When it gets to the stage where you're ready to begin the actual scenes, I personally tend to do backgrounds first because I like to set characters into backgrounds - and for every animatic, I have the Awkward Blue Sketch Stage which is basically my beat boards timed out as an animatic.

I used Storyboard Pro for this (Toonboom, not free ): icky), but the process can be replicated across most art platforms in whichever way you feel most comfy with! This is so I can time the drawings before I devote time cleaning them up-- which can make for some Pretty Funny looking little guys but theyre important!! trust!!

Once a big sequence of shots is cleaned up (I usually do 40-60 second chunks at a time), I export the .mov and send it to my editing program (which in this case is still Premiere Pro) - and then repeat this process again and again until.. it's done??

Here's like a TL;DR list of basically everything I said summed up:

• Make a loose script or bulletin of the idea! Do your research!

• Depending on what kind of animatic you're making, time it to music!

• Make a beat board of very loose gestures for your shots, and time them - then move on to refinement & cleanup!

• Combine all shots, refine music cues and timings, add any last needed VFX, and export!

There's no secret recipe or anything, it's just learning a pipeline that best suits you, whether it is for something professional or something you want to make for fun because you just love to make!!

[ewyband]

EWY BIG Q&A

hi!! recently i did a q&a on instagram about SLAD. unfortunately (or fortunately?) there were too many questions to answer purely on instagram stories without spamming. here's the ones i couldn't answer on instagram, answered here!

MERLOT, both in terms of my favourite composition and performance

my partner and i were on a break whilst they were studying abroad ("we're only on month 1 of 4"). I just kinda word vomited my feelings. I was feeling pretty depressed at the time I wont lie.

yes i DID!!! this EP was MADE for fun. i wrote the songs specifically to make fun songs to play live. (aside from HOLLOW DRUG)

"And I could be displaced from my home And it could be seen on all your phones Is it real? Or is it fake? Look close, do my arms look like legs?"

probs the most lyrically dense I've been?? i'm not sure.

first of all, thank you so much!! second, some songs i write it all in one day but others can take a week or so before i'm fully happy with how its sounding. that being said, i always end up changing something before recording (usually around a month after writing, but in the case of MERLOT, that was recorded only a week after writing).

if i had to just name one, it'd be Nirvana. I wrote a 3000 word essay on In Utero for uni and that genuinely inspired me to make these songs. I really loved how Nirvana performed and I thought 'man, if only I had songs like that where I'd have an excuse to go crazy' other influences would include Jeff Rosenstock (my #1 fav artist) and PUP (greatest live show I've ever been to) btw, thank u sm!!

yes,,, very much

unfortunately i havent learnt proper scream technique so all of my screams were done at the very very end of my recording sessions. i think it worked out because that meant i had a lot of pent up frustration

i will start by saying my uni lets me hire out all of these microphones for free (if you don't count the student loan) vocals: SM7b & RE20 (only on sociopathic leech) guitar: AKG C414 matched pair (acoustic and electric) bass: my takes were originally done with an RE20, pretty sure fern just DI'd drums: Audix DP7 + SM57 (for hi-hat) + C414 for room mic's

i'll try get this done tomorrow!

i was in a guitar lesson at uni and we were talking about chromatics in the blues scale. my guitar teacher suggested i try to make a riff using the blues scale and particularly the chromatic part. that riff ended up being the middle 8 section of RIGHTS TO MY WRONGS. the rest of the song basically acted as a vessel to transport this breakdown middle 8 section. hopefully it doesn't come across that way !!!!!! but that was the main idea.

it felt very natural. i'll probably continue to go this direction in my future releases.

its mainly a reference to SOCIOPATHIC LEECH! 'i could beat you with a bat'. i just wanted something that felt visceral and angry and i feel like izzie really captured that.

yes and no! brett romnes is a super nice guy and very fun to work with. i obviously had my own mixes so he could see what i preferred and essentially made it better. i think there ended up being 4 drafts before we reached a final master.

these were my original mixing notes! i think the only thing that really got lost in translation was i added some really subtle vocal distortion at the end of HOLLOW DRUG in my original mix. in the end, i feel empowered by brett because he made it sound like what i felt it should sound like in my head (DOES THIS SENTENCE MAKE SENSE!?)

after i wrote SOCIOPATHIC LEECH and RIGHTS TO MY WRONGS, i was like 'okay, this is the style we're going for, lets do some sort of project in this particular style' i was pretty dead set on an EP since i'd just done an album. so to answer your question, yes and no!

i wish i could put something significant here. im sure theres some psychologist out there who could tell me that the song represents something about me. i was feeling alienated at the time, hopefully this helps? "confess your sins to the crowd, no-one can hear you when you're talking so loud" is definitely about my frustrations with song meanings though

hi mikey!

this person was the GM for a cyberpunk TTRPG game i played in. i wanted to write a cyberpunk themed album at one point but i guess that one merlot line is the closest we'll get.

i have semi answered this question but I WANTED TO WRITE SONGS THAT WERE FUN TO PLAY LIVE !!!!! and i think it worked out in the end

THANK YOU EVERYONE WHO WROTE IN !!! MY ASKBOX IS ALWAYS OPEN!!!

[romanarose]

Fic Recs

I'll admit I've been slacking. A lot. It was a high anxiety summer as you know, and I've finally been able to pretty much cut ties with an abusive friend who was causing a LOT of those anxiety and panic attacks. BUT I want to rec some of my fav writers and fav stories.

To keep the presure low on myself I am only linking ONE story per writer, whatever story that speaks to me. I do hope if you like the story you'll check out more from them!

Please remember to reblog their stories if you read them, and if you feel inclinded, leave a kind comment! Big comments are fantastic but even a short "Great story!" Means the world!

Dead Dove Do Not Eat and all dark fics will be in red. Might make a whole other dddne tag list on my dark blog on of these days lmfao

Moon Knight

Fractured Moon by @melodygatesauthor : DDDNE Yandere Moon boys x reader, non con, extreme violence but such good interpretations of the boys

Friendly Favors by @runa-falls best friend steven, friends with benefits??? friends to lovers??? yes plzzz

Rydal Keener

Oxford Comma by @whatthefishh : Collage AU, Rydall is cunty, serves cunt, and eats cunt. What can I say.

TLOU (Most of what I'm reading rn if im being honest)

Linger On by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin : Pre-outbreak!Joel, angst, yummy smut, ft. my boyfriend, Tommy (Angela said I can be Tommy's gf)

Caught by @toxicanonymity : Inspired Keep Cry'n, Joel catches you when you try to run, masterbates onto your face. part 2 has TOMMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Maintainence Man series by @gracieispunk : Joel is a, well, Maintenace man in our building! He is married but that doesn't stop him from fucking you

Hungry Hearts @atinylittlepain : If ya'll know me, you know I love Bruce Springsteen. I have 2 fics named after springsteen songs, one joel one javi/santi/reader. I've fallen behind on the series but loved it enough to make fan art! terrible fan art but still! Pre-outbreak, takes place in two timelines- college age and then the 2000'. Joel has Sarah, reader is ellies mom which I think is fun.

Exit Wounds by @strang3lov3 : No fic masterlist so I tagged the main masterlist. Now listen. I love Tommy Y'all know I love tommy... but cheating on tommy? Im so sorry baby. But ur also an asshole lol. Had it coming.

Creep by @theywhowriteandknowthings : I- ugh just read it. darkish but nothing insane like the wrong way lmfao. pretty mild comparatively but use discression but THAT TWISTTTTTTTT

Only Daddy That'll Walk the Line by @millerscoffee Yellow istead of red bc its not like. dark but Joel's pretty mean

Not A Survialist Girl by @tightjeansjavi again yellow bc joel's a dick lol but THE DIRTY TALK?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Miguel O'Hara

Halo by @missdictatorme : Miguel O'Hara goes full Nathan Bateman and fucks his ai. Whore.

Only You Only Me by @astroboots : so im behind on this one too. What about it! Im terrible I know but like Hungry Hearts above I may be a slow reader but I didn't forget and also did stupid fan art of this great fic too. lol. Anyway plz read this, I cant give a great summary bc im only a few chapters in but if youre in the oscar fandon you know cici writes only bangers

No One But Me by @koshkamartell : You try to break things off with Joel and begin spending time with the hot librrian in Jackson. Joel does not like thi

Triple Frontier

Under Neon Lights by @campingwiththecharmings : sexy drunk sex with my baby boi, santi <3

Through the Scope by @ssuperficialspacecadett : Reader works for Benny and falls for frankie. Great relationships with all the boys, reader has sexual trauma so you knoooooooow i eat these fics up!!!! lovely to see all them be appriciated with special focus on FRANKIE my precious lol guy

Shared Breathes by @frenchiereading : DAD FRANKIE x teacher reader. Triple frontier may have forgotten Frankie has a baby (he deserved the money for her) BUT WE DID NOT!!!!!

The Story of Us by @pimosworld : You served in the military with the boys but they made a deal not to sleep with you. Years later after helping you escape abuse, one by one they begin to waver aka you fuck them all. FishBen as a bonus!!

Goddamn have I really only been reading TLOU XD lmfao makes sense bc thats mostly what Im writing. That and the Javier pena x reader x santi and then the will fic but im soooooooooo much of a TLOU whore rn its insane.

Im sure ill remeber some more amazing TF fics soon but for now here we are!

Gonna plug real quick my latest one shot tho bc it's a holiday and I can self promo if I want! Shana Tova, moon boys x non jewish!reader where the moon boys share a part of their jewish identity with you!

THANK YOU TO ALL WRITERS FOR YOUR HARD WORK, I APPRICIATE YOU!

If you ever seen my like and not reblog know its just bc I forgot and im sorry. If you ever tagged me in a tag game and i never responded its bc I forgot and again IM SORRY

If I didnt tag anyone and you think i didt think your fic was worthy THATS NOT IT im simply overwhelmed with how much ive read and how this summer was and i just havnt organized it all. Im sorry!!

[ideasarestuckinmyhead]

|•♡•♡{Welcome pick your man!}♡•♡•|

|•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡.{Number 7}.♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•|

period pains

{♡} requested

- Period comfort with Alphonse!

cuddle pile

{♡} requested

- Alphonse is soft for Seth and Boo cuddling on the couch. Which turns into a cuddle pile on the bed.

Faded pictures

{♡} requested

- Boo found alphonses baby pics now he found theirs :D ft Seth

bibically accurate Boo

{♡} ask

- The boys see Boo cursing a bloodline.

lyric

{♡} ask

- *falls to my knees* AAAHHH

Why did Boo move?

{♡} ask

- idea for Boo

cat

{♡} ask

- if Alphonse turned into a cat

Genderbend?

{♡} personal

- he'd def look like his mama

speed demon

{♡} personal

- Boo isn't allowed to drive alone

nightmares

{♡} personal

- nightmares of what did happen before it got reversed.

song

{♡} personal

- IF YOU WANNA GOOODD TIIMMEEE WELL HERE I AM BABY-

sitting down sadly

{♡} personal

- really wishes you meet them. Or let them see Seth became better.

get the fuck out

{♡} personal

- Boo is protective and Alphonse wouldn't want anything else.

Incorrect Quotes:

given no fucks

magical in bed

Arm Wrestling Champ!

{♡} requested

- Can't beat a beefy guy in a arm wrestle so what does Boo do? Kiss him!

not the worst thing I've been called

{♡} ask

- Boo's been called worst. Seth still cringes at that-

Seth's relationship with Boo and Alphonse

{♡} personal

- He still can't belive they give a shit about him after everything.

Daisy dukes

{♡} personal

- he got the ass for them

Family

{♡} personal

- the wonders of do I have a family out there? Would they accept me?

Incorrect Quotes:

FURRY!!

Anger issues

{♡} requested

- Charlie with a Casper that has anger issues.

crying rn

{♡} ask

- full on sobbing for him ngl

Casper as a music artist

{♡} ask

- Casper making love songs inspired by Charlie

fire

{♡} personal

- lil arson never hurt anybody

Charlie and Casper's relationship

{♡} personal

- Charlie thought he'd end up in a ditch. Not in loving arms.

if married

{♡} personal

- *blows off dust* now for my vows-

Casper the weed dealer ghost

{♡} personal

- Ik the weed dealer it's my partner <33

Incorrect Quotes:

wanna join?~

wasn't made for

Incorrect Quotes:

Keeping it civil

pondered my orb

make him pregnant

not sane <;/3

gonna tweak

Autistic Star

{♡} requested

relationship worries

{♡} personal

- he worries a lot. Of being valuable with his heart.

kinnie moment

{♡} personal

- he was SO a undertale fan.

really need my mom (big ass post ngl)

{♡} personal

- ow angst that I hurt myself with

Incorrect Quotes:

going to far?

Mario cart

nefted height

Lovey Dovey Auron

{♡} requested

- he's so in love it's sickening

Rook loves dancing

{♡} requested

- What if Rook loved dancing? HC's

Nightmares

{♡} personal

- Auron has worries, of if hed be able to protect them.

mentally stable? naw

{♡} personal

- if ur my fav I torture u

beware of the pipeline

{♡} personal

- THE PIPELINE!?!?

receptionist Rook

{♡} personal

- let's be honest Trish would love to have Rook as a receptionist like Rook.

Loving Auron

{♡} personal

- when a writer loves you, you never truly die.

Auron and Rook's relationship

{♡} personal

- Auron is so scared of this, but he can't stop loving them.

love poem book

{♡} personal

- He'd write a thousand poems and sit by then as they read every single one.

AURONS BACKSHOTS

{♡} personal

- the holy backshot post

rambling of Auron's story

{♡} personal

- deep dive into Auron's story

HIS HAIRR

{♡} personal

- RIDHFJSJXJE IM GONNA RRRAAWWRR GGRR BAKRABRJA JD S

Incorrect Quotes:

pleeassse?

experience

how Rook came to his heart

HC's!!

{♡} requested

- Lucien things bc I love him

misunderstanding

{♡} requested

- Boo sees them connecting again. Maybe they should leave....

Southern Stars

{♡} reblog

- from a moot who also love Southern Stars!

Seth and Al song

{♡} ask

- more about lyric below

Bittersweet Boo idea

{♡} ask

- Boo calling their parent in a park after everything

Boo's parent ask

{♡} ask

- an idea of Boo's parents

Bittersweet HP houses

{♡} ask

- Harry Potter houses!

Wild flowers

{♡} ask

- Moot asks me what I think of Wild flowers! Aka Seth x Finn

Middle ground dynamic

{♡} personal

- Darling and Auron are guard dogs for Finn basically

Southern Stars with creep

{♡} personal

- Faust internally: God I'm gonna FUCK you...

Wildflowers puppy love

{♡} personal

- Aawweee puppy loovvee

Bittersweet rant

{♡} personal

- Seth and Alphonse are soulmates. Platonic or romantic they are connected.

More bittersweet thoughts

{♡} personal

- more bittersweet thoughts bc I love them

Middle Ground argument

{♡} personal

- Darling and Ahron argue in the back ALL the time

flaasshhbaacckk

{♡} personal

- Alphonse gonna go through it ngl

dont cry dont cry dont cry

{♡} personal hc

- Auron and Faust hate crying in front of people.

middle ground + Faust

{♡} personal

- Faust: that WHORE!

trio

{♡} personal

- Trio of weed. Casper, Pete, and Boo

Seth and Al lyric

{♡} personal

- hey man I love you but NO FUCKING WAY

TRAMP STAMPS!!

{♡} personal

- teehee tramp stamps on the boys

tattoos

{♡} personal

- tattoos for some of the boys

Listeners tattoo idea

{♡} personal

- tattoos for all the listeners :D

Seth x Alphonse City arch

{♡} personal work

- What did happen that night when Alphonse left?

YV boy's and their listeners

{♡} personal work

- Rambles about yv relationships.

Southern stars!!

{♡} personal

- Seth x Faust type shit I love the your honor

The kids love Boo

{♡} personal

- Boo watches over the kids.

Married in Vegas

{♡} personal work

- got married in Vagas and it bites them in the ass later. With Boo, Casper and Rook.

Demigod Au

{♡} personal

- make the listeners op.

Middle ground how Auron got into the realationship

{♡} personal work

- Auron x Darling x Finn how did it all began?

help make a canvas!

{♡} personal

- All the boys helping make a canvas!

Incorrect Quotes (dosent apply to one YV boy):

Explanation plz

YV as quotes from me and my friend

communication of middle ground

Mario cart with listeners

ALPHONSE!!

nvm no plan

GET ON YOUR KNEES!!

know each other in every universe

mosquitoes suck

sugar free haribo gummy bears

•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•♡•

•♡•♡.Please consider following.♡•♡•

[activatebutterflyshield]

Songs that make me really really really want to learn animation so I can make epic sequences with them as the soundtrack

- Notos by the Oh Hellos, itd make a great phoenix-rising, defeated-character-realizing-their-power-and-absolutely-destroying-someone-who-did-them-real-trauma thing. Also the metaphors and imagery. “Every inhale I take, swallow the ocean whole and I am one / With the hurricane, tall as the tide that laps with a rabid tongue”??? “With every exhale I break you down with a fury, I lay the hills undone / Like a dog gone untamed, bellowing out a river from my lungs”??????

- Boreas by the Oh Hellos, the perfect sort of ‘Im completely defeated but by god I’m still going to do something to help’

- Okay I should just include all of the Four Winds EPs in here. Get over here, Eurus and Zephyrus. Passerine and Rio Grande specifically.

- The Horror and the Wild by the Amazing Devil, see this one fandom post I made that was basically a desperate attempt to visualize an animatic I could never make

- Chords by the Amazing Devil, entirely different vibes but bloody hell it lights a fire in my heart every time I hear it. Just. “We were the winter nights / So you could be the morning snow / Your life begins by leaving / And our love is shown / In the letting go”????????

- Rockslide by the Crane Wives. Im writing a whole thing about that album, Coyote Stories’, relationship with climate change and the generally horrible state of the world and this song is the reason. “Oh I pray today my soul to keep / But we best get a move on or the devil we will meet”?? I mean. Mates. It hits hard.

- Sleeping Giants by the Crane Wives. Same album as Rockslide and just as strong if not more so. It would make for a great call-to-war or prelude-to-a-big-ol-battle.

- Rule #3 Paperwork by Fish in a Birdcage. By goodness is Paperwork underrated (though methinks Rule #2 Moonlight is even more underrated but thats just a good song) and I love it to death. Just a great song for an easygoing time. Or, alternatively, a great song for a subtle call to action.

- Rule #33 Pyre by Fish in a Birdcage. Its just great. A final, fond farewell from a beloved parent or mentor or loved one or other dear person telling you that you’ll be fine after they’re gone. Also the accordion is really neat in this one. “Trust yourself and live it your way”. It just is great.

- WOLVES OF THE REVOLUTION. ARCADIAN WILD. This gave so much inspiration for writing a revolution and the people involved in it. Its perfect for that arc. It doesnt bloody matter if said revolution is in a war tragedy of a fanfic.

Theres more but I dont have much to say about them, so just know that Horse Soldier, Horse Soldier (Corb Lund), Solar Waltz (Cosmo Sheldrake), Mvmt II Begin and Never Cease (The Oh Hellos (really bloody Christian but its so good just music wise)(Also Christmas as hell)), The Day Goes On (Bill Wurtz), and my very dear Discord’s Smallest Violin (The AJR Discord) are also very dear to my heart and would probably become something if I had enough commitment and free time and all those other extremely volatile factors to actually learn how to animate. I will, someday. But that day is not today.

Also I swear to you @writer-of-random-things I am writing the climate-change-Coyote-Stories thing. It exists. Or, about half of it exists. I got to The Hand That Feeds and its. Uh. A lot.

[t00nyah]

I wish to know more about splatoon, tell me about ur ocs and how they fit into the lore!

TONYAH OCS TIME

let's start with my sonas

why do i have two? well... first one, tuna, was made literally just when i jumped into splatoon fr(before that i just liked comics about squid sisters i saw on my tl haha). they reflect me a lot more: a depressed mentally unstable bitch with nothing to do but hang out with friends. in the version of splatoon universe where they exist, they and their bestie formed their own 'squidbeak splatoon' parody (neo new squidbeak splatoon as we call it) and ended up doing basically what agents do in splatoon - war crimes /hj (im not willing to describe the entirety of splatoon story for this post im sorry). they're basically an agent 3 replacement, i think i lean into being a leader in my friend groups a lot too. they also write music, just like me!

second one, neon, is a little different. it's like they just take aspects of me from a different kinds of episodes. they are meant to be new agent 3's replacement(so they're canonically just splatoon 3's protagonist) BUT they don't have a smallfry buddy, because their buddy is my favourite salmonid - flipper flopper. they reflect the nicer part of me, they're also selectively mute because at the time i struggled a lot more with speaking and it was way easier for me to say something with gestures than to actually open my mouth without having words stuck in my throat haha. they are also an inktoling, a genetical fusion of an inkling and an octoling because i think both fit me well!! and tbh i would assign my mom octoling and my dad inkling they have such hardcore coding it's insane.

oshizushi and iwashi were probably my first actually thought out splatoon ocs.

in splatoon world creativity is a very(an i mean very) big thing, self-expression too. and oshizushi is another music person. while iwashi is a chaotic designer with her own brand going. oshi is also from the domes, it's just. a fact.

kaigara and hitodeko! so, in my splatoon ocs' geography there's a new town - Kelpton. it's a beach city with very unstable weather, and because of this they have turf war stages adapted for any weather. because idk if you know that but inklings and octolings dissolve in water, they fucking DIE in water. those two are Kelpton's idols! and of course they also have to do weather forecast since it's such a big thing for Kelpton. kaigara comes from a poor family from this town and worked hard to get money, and hitodeko is a daughter of an octarian elite soldier, she enjoys life to its fullest after leaving the domes.

then there's team family!

they're a bunch of dumb teenagers who play turf war in team. they're meant to be more coroika(splatoon manga) inspired . purble and vintage are like toxic older siblings to bucket and stripes who are innocent babies of their team. (none of them are actually related AND in their family dynamic purble is mom-assigned to all of them lmao). also bubbles the salmonid daughter of stripes! she yoinked a golden egg from vintage(he steals from grizzco, this boy is trouble) and raised salmonid as her daughter with help of ... oshizushi! and a bit of iwashi's help there.

music is big in splatoon. all of splatoon music has lore, we have so-called splatbands - every track has an in-game band behind it. and so i had to make my own splatband.

the celestigals!! an all-girls-with-the-small-exception-of-gui band!! they write songs about how shit love is!!!! that's my genre KJSFDBHFKLJKFDJSN

sepia is a cuttlefish, elysia is a sea slug (you've seen this one before.), shinobu is a sea anemone, gui is an incognito gobi and ori is a tiger crab i think. sepia is like their leader and a vocalist, she's the most unbearable person ever but they vibe with her.

sepia also lives wth namihiko, her ex boyfriend who's...an octoling who thinks he's an inkling. he doesn't have anything going in his life except for that little confusion except for the fact that he's very chill and can take sepia's anger issues and wild temper pretty well.

this is reena(she/he/they)! they're an insanely talented inkling who can play a lot of different instruments and they usually work for others. he helped kaigara and hitodeko in fact!

BRANDA. she doesn't have TOO MUCH lore going on, but she was a technician in octarian military, then she ended up in kamabo co and was one of the sanitizing octolings based on a concept from haikara walker(an octo expansion artbook), and then somehow ended up FUZZY OOZED. AND NOW SHE'S A FUZZY OCTOLING. BRO DOESN'T HAVE NO MEMORY BUT PURE VIBES AT THIS POINT. i love branda.

here's also DJ duali38 or duali! she exists purely in one au where on winter holidays sanitized octolings just suddenly can't obey tartar and CHILL and CELEBRATE. she became a DJ after ahato/acht left and she's just a small goober..

another oc who's kinda from au is arctic (octoling on the right)! she's neo agent 3's girlfriend who studies linguistics and has a dictionary with a lot of attempts to decipher human language(s). in this version of splatoon 3 they both are agents and work together and all. i can't not point out how there was a fun period where i did an experimental ask thing for another au of mine and someone mentioned arctic and i blew up i actually don't think i'll ever recover from how cool that was

polpopic never had too much lore but she's a pro salmonrunner who's also almost just as tall as her main weapon sloshing machine and the fact that she's that efficient with it despite her size is terrifying to everyone around

also kurakka exists. i never gave them lore but they're a sanitized octoling who looks like they could be a manager who doesn't give a fuck. i wish there was a way to write their lore that way. (they just don't fit splatoon lore. but i mean.)

if you've read the entire thing thank you so much for this question thunder it was nice :) a lot of my ocs are underdeveloped im pretty sure it's very ovious but i love them all

[ashtraythief]

Hey! So ive been a long time reader of ur underneath verse (since like.. 2018? Maybe even 2017?) and i just wanted to drop by and tell u how much im enjoying rereading ur writing! Like in general i think this is one of my fav fics series just bc its so extensive and well done and thought out and fleshed out so well it works so well? Like seeing all the different angles and the way u choose to frame things is really fun for me and kinda inspires my own writing in some aspects.

Ive never read the whole thing all in one go before so ive decided to do that right now and im just about done with the pied pipers song - more specifically willys chapter. And i kinda needed to let u know that ur series really stands out to me just bc of how many glimpses into other characters and all these different povs of the same thing like on it stands out on a technical level but then ur actual writing of these things is so good and compelling and like as an outsider pov bitch it hits the spot for me so well? Like ur writing is never stale and its always interesting.

I specifically wanted to take this time to mention that i really love willy and winstons characters and how u went about it. Like im ngl the way u wrote them kinda makes me want to cry tears of happiness for them bc they have found ppl who appreciate them and they have connections with other ppl but then the bittersweet tang of jensen and willy is kinda fucking me up rn /pos djjdjdjd like in general u really do the bittersweet jensen is stuck undercover angle really well and it HURTS so good

But yes i dont really have a good concise message or comment to leave beyond the fact that i keep stopping every few sentences to get up and jump bc im so excited about what im reading i need to get rid of that excess energy lol so sorry if this is all over the place and a really messy message! I just really wanted to let u know how much im enjoying reading it all rn. Thank you so much for sharing ur writing with us and for continuing to write for this series its so fun!

omg nonnie, I'm kinda speechless here (this is the second wonderful message in two days so I'm kinda overwhelmed. is it send wonderful messages week somewhere??)

I just am so grateful and this message made me so happy. never apologize for maybe not having a five point outline lol, this is amazing.

The underneath verse has always been my fandom baby, so praise for it is already amazing, but the pied piper fic and Winston and Willy epsecially, it just makes my heart so full. Ten years ago, they definitely started out as stock characters of mob drivers, because I didn't think this fic would get so big, but then it did, and Willy especially became a real character. a) because I knew he'd fall in love with Jensen too, as anyone does really and b) because I looooove the bittersweet undercover Jensen shtick where I write from other character's POV and the reader knows how wrong they're getting it but they don't *mu har har* (yeah I'm a little mean sometime. sorry?)

but in all seriousness, the Willy chapter, I'ev been working on that for months. And I kept adding things and rewriting things and trying to get it perfect even though I know that most people who read the story mostly care about Jared and Jensen (which is totally fair and understandable), but I care about him and there are a few people out there who do too (and I love you for it, so much), but with Willy, I just wante to do this /right/. I've come to love him so much, and he's come to be so important to Jensen, it felt like he and Winston really deserve their own story told even though that's kind of ridiculous because they're not real, but they're a little real to me now. All this to say, nonnie, this comment and your appreciation of Willy means so fucking much to me. And my poor alpha reader who read like four drafts of this (seriously, M. is a saint) and my beta readers who then had to beta four iterations of this. To know that this effort is appreciated this much honestly make me cry a little (I am not having the greatest time right now, so I cry easily but the point still stands. Thank you.)

This message was actually such an energy boost I'm currently trying to fix the next timestamp, lol so I'll have something to post next month. You're a true treasure, nonnie <3

[moyazaika]

Work just ended and I decided to get back and see what I missed while I was getting used to my work. I’m doing all of this while my dad, who also speaks and understands English perhaps to a lesser degree than me, is next to me. Sometimes you just need some adrenaline to remind you that you’re alive.

Regarding Indulgence. I think I’ve said it before, but honestly the way you write makes me feel defenseless. You make me want to analyze and pick apart what you’ve written just for the sake of both properly appreciating everything and just… understating. I can’t even express what I’m feeling right now. I feel like Gollum, your writing is the ring.

TWO TONGUES??? IM IN. Been a while since I read something that has a monster, more in the physical sense. “—that i’m not some big. bad. monster.” IM- IM HITTING THE TABLE, IM- “and this time, when he finds you (and he will; for there is no way you can outrun your own shadow)” I’m in love with the way you write. I’m speechless, I want to ask a million questions and just,,,, I don’t feel like what I want to say makes sense. BUT IM KAYDJQJSBQBSNBBQBS

Reading the jaded lawyer reader and the yan crime kingpin. Forget the yan, I don’t know whatever I want to be darling or if I want them. Nevermind, I also want the yan. Love the dynamic. There’s something about the banter that just scratches an itch in my brain, I just love all of this. Keep feeding me this good stuff pretty please. As long as you’re free and wish to do so, of course. Remember to rest properly.

Just finished the extra. I’m obsessed and deeply concerned for darling. Fly high darling, I know you’re not making it out alive. 🕊️ Man’s got nothing to lose, he already has nothing but his life and he doesn’t even seem to care.

By the way, I was once spacing out while working and ended thinking about red because why not. I think you once said that both the yans and red had that certain desesperation that seemed appealing to me, so I began to wonder what exactly made them so interesting to me. I ended getting obsessed with a edit that is unrelated to the point, but it’s was a Taylor’s song and there’s this certain part that reminded me of Red.

“And I love you, it's ruining my life

(I love you, it's ruining my life)

I touched you for only a fortnight

(I touched you) but I touched you”

I love the “But I touched you” part. Because, like, I feel it doesn’t really talk about physical touch. It’s something deeper, at least I felt so and in a clip of the video it seems to show so. The first time I ever came to see Red was in the overly amazing anarchy fic. That story was absolutely amazing I still remember crying at night over it. Anyways, it shows a domestic scene and perhaps that’s what made me crave them. I think that at least to a certain degree, yans win. At least from what I’ve seen and remember, they get darling and end murdering Red or doing whatever to get him away. Red doesn’t win. They seem aware of the fact that they won’t win. Why do they keep trying? What’s so important that they repeat the same mistake over and over again? And you could perhaps say that seems kinda obsessive of them. It’s almost pitiful, but there’s something that I love about tragic characters.

Btw, in the fic with Dean (the one that inspired me to draw Red) there was this other character that was all lovely dovely with Red. At least from what I remember. I’m not proud to say that the first time I read that his name was Freddy (can’t remember if that’s how it was spelled, I don’t care. Man stole my spouse 🫵 /jk) my first thought was Freddy Fazbear. Anyways, if said love was mutual, then Red could be taken out of the equation. I mean, they don’t show romantic interest in darling (I think), so that somehow makes me think that they’re somehow safe in that regard. I love to think about the different implications. And, even if it somehow pains me to see my beloved with someone else /jk, I would be glad to think that they’re somehow safe. Meanwhile darling is crawling into the wolf’s den. Way to go babe, hope you make it out in one piece. 🕊️

So I was writing this in my notes app and forgot to send it. It’s been hours since my shift ended but I didn’t want to edit certain stuff. Now, how are you doing? Have you been eating properly? Drinking enough water? Please remember to take care of yourself, I know you’ll achieve great things and your efforts will be rewarded, but do remember to treat yourself kindly.

- ❤️‍🩹 anon, apologies for sending long paragraphs. I know you said that you wanted to empty your ask inbox and I feel guilty.

NONONO do NOTTT ever apologise for sending an ask i love long asks like this the most and i promise i don’t mind!!! and even tho i am clearing out older ones, interactions like this are like the fuel that keep me writing on tumblr so dON’T APOLOGISEE

i hope works been going well nepo baby LOLOL no but truly it can be so daunting when u know ur working later that day so i’m sure you’re doing great and i’m rooting for ya !! :)

DEFENSELESS!?$)!?!??!$2$& i’m losing my marbles that’s the best compliment you could’ve ever given me nonnie T_T thank u so much,, gOllumAND THE RING NOWOSOSII that’s taking me out 😭😭😭 “my precioussss my preciousss” well then you’re the gold and i’m smaug 😜

i love monsters in the more abstract sense like wdym the monster is just. your own shadow. what. i’m working on something rn where the monster in question is childhood nostalgia or childhood fears and i’m veeeery excited for u to read that !!!!! altho two tongues is always a bonus too in a more physical sense 😝😝

i fully agree with you yan kingpin needs to be put down he’s like a mad dog but lawyer darling helloooo handsome!!!! wdym they’re bossy and no nonsense and never lose a case,,, they’re gonna be winning another case when the court decides to give me a restraining order for how much i love them 🙏🏽😭😭😭 i love darlings colder or more nonchalant than the actual yan it’s so fun 🤲🏽🤲🏽 even tho that means the darling is more attractive to me than the yan HAHHH 😭😭

FREDDY FAZBEAR NOSOSODOSO i actually forgot his name too i haven’t touched that trilogy in so long oops but yeah you’re right in saying red holds no (?) romantic attraction towards reader, but i’m still not sure if that makes them safe. i know i keep teasing u with this amazing backstory they have but trust me one day i’ll write it out and post it and i think you’ll realise all the pieces fitting together :’) but for now, i can only say so much cus i want it to be as satisfying as possible for u when u do read it.

yea thank u for asking lovely!! i’ve been tryna drink 1L a day because i want to cut back on consuming mindless junk food, and i heard it keeps you fuller so hopefully it goes well :p i hope you’re also taking care of yourself <3

[seven-stars-in-his-palm]

ok. i took a long, long time (song ref) but hi!!!!!!!!!

1. titanic fic (*cue shit-eating grin*). umum. im curious if there's anything about the morse code yet. or codes in gen actually. so. sentences with the word "code" :3

2. titanic vid!!!! Idk if you like the engineering aspects, but there still were a ton of other facts sprinkled in (spiral staircases, people that monitored coal balance, separate staff room for firemen, how they got air down there etc) https://youtube.com/watch?v=4begc_U8ygI#searching

3. surprise!! this is an interview. i have some Official Author questions for you (feel free to pick and choose, come back to this later, or just striaght up ignore lol):

3a. Do you have any authors (professional or not) that you aspire to be like one day?

3b. Following that up, are there any specific works (again, published, professional, etc or just amazing amateur works!!) that really inspire you?

3c. What made you start writing? I'm curious on anything that led to the conscious decision, of course, but additionally do you think there was anything you grew up with that "planted the seeds"? Was it any of the people from question 3a?

3d. What's the silliest (/pos) idea you've ever had for a fic? If you didn't write/publish it, why not? Was it a recent thing? If not, do you think your experience would have influenced that idea today?

if those dont make sense u can send me a messgae or something 👍👍👍 goodnight

ITS BEEN THREE DAYS but im here okay……. lets do this. hi pep :>

1) alas, i’ve been focusing on a lot of other things so i havent reached a written point of the Code Usage, which begins in like chapter 3-4. sorry man 💔 (progress has been made ! just not as much as i’d hope 😭)

2) FUN FACTS?!??!??!??!!?!!? IM WATCHING A DOCUMENTARY RN BUT IM YOINKING THIS RIGHT AFTER YIPPIE!!!!!!!!

3a) uhmmmmmmmm i dont exactly pay attention to authors as much as i pay attention to books but you know what. rick riordan. not because of anything he’s done or written but because of his audacity to write 20+ books in the same universe and still get 100000000000000 people 1000000% invested in it. i wanna write sequels forever. can i be him

3b) OHHHHHHHH UHM UHM UHM UHM the thing that got me into fanfic specifically was the fic “versability” (it was a gf fic about ‘what if ford never made the portal’, written like 2015-16, and yeah i did know of and even read a bit of fic beforehand but i was never into it) but just READING ? the land of stories by chris colfer, easy. mmmmmmmmm that was my fucking Thing. if i wasnt a baby at that time i would have WROTE. SO. MUCH. GOOD GOD. IT WAS MY THING. THE THING THAT GOT ME INTO NOVELS. URGH. alex my iconic mentally ill bisexual, conner my precious cynical boy. i need to read those again my GOD now i think about it that was fairytale fanfiction that happejed to bepublished and ohhhhh it was beautiful. im gonna read jt . iM GONNA DO IT!!!!

3c) in writing in general or just fanfic? for fanfic its that one day i had an gf fic idea (that i had to heavily revise/rewrite, but it did end up getting out eventually) that i hadnt read anything like it, and i wanted to see it. decided: hey, im shit at writing, but might as well!!!!!! 65k words later, its not a joke anymore. im a Writer now :) but as for in general, well ofc reading books. people told me in the past im creative and should get into book writing if you like reading so much. i decided well im gonna do it professionally, but might as well do something tiny, so i well uh wrote. im not gonna tell you but it certainly was Something. classic isekai mary sue dramatic plot hybrids etc etc etc but actually the queen the mc is “related” to is actually polyam and was in a relationship with both their dad and their mom and the big villain is the queen’s sister who’s pissed that both of her lovers ditched her for the human world (but actually they had to break up because because the society was not polyam friendly. there just happened to be a war after that). everything else was basic isekai except for that little crumble of lore. the queen was a bisexual. the dad was a pansexual. the mom was a lesbian. i think i ate there to be honest

3d) mmmmmm i gotta think. there was definitely a gf x amphibia au where ford got ploped in amphibia and the plantars IMMEDIATELY stole him and wrapped him up in their adventures right when the plot starting becoming a thing (early season 2). there’s one where stan and ford just….. climb a tree. it’s laced with a lot of philosophical talks straight from good omens knowledge but ultimately its just goody fun. mmmmm theres one where gabriel has no idea what crowley looks like, but he DOES know what Bildad The Shuite looks like, itd be tiny but so so so so funny. the gf/gomens crossover…..a human au based on that one tumblr post about a necromancer bringing people back from the dead to fuck with the killer and opening a discord support group….. the s1 humans + aziraphale being the victims, crowley the necromancer, and the s2 humans being the nosy outsiders who Notice things happens but can never say shit. oughhhh……… Yeah. yeah, thats good. most of these are recent except 4 the amphibia one, wouldnt change much about it even with the shit i know now EXCEPT being able to handle the relationships/emotions between the characters better, ive certainly gotten better at it and i love it. i havent published any bc either i started but couldnt finished, or just thought it was neat and moved on to plop it in the ideas folder and wait 4 inspiration.

OKAY THATS A LOT BUT THERE YOU GO sorry for the wait, man. you’re my best cupperty you know that right 🫵 ANSWERS!!!!! and ill work on titanic as fast as i can, it hasnt been forgotten !! i just gotta mow the grass….. (“short” fic wips)

[pjsk-writin]

OKAY SO I THOUGHT ABT THIS,IK YOU HAVE A LOT OF REQ BUT YOU CAN JUST READ THIS FOR UR ENJOYMENT HSHS

what if the reader is a really talented Guitarist who doesn't have much confidence in theur skills, but they have a channel where they go by the alias of guitar girl (u can change it if u like!) where they have far more confidence, maybe that's how they semi know 25 Nightcord? Or at least Kanade, maybe Kanade reached out to reader but they declined Kanade offer due to them not wanting to step out of their comfort zone especially since they don't really like working with others.

AND LIKE HERE'S THE AKITO PART

Akito and reader were childhood friends, maybe how they met was when Reader was practicing her guitar skills and like Akito soccer ball almost hit reader LMAO then they became friends after that.

Akito knows that reader has potential to hit big if they try and perform on the streets, but the reader refuses and like they sort of had an argument after that. Akito lashes out (smth like how Tsukasa yelled at nene during the wxs story) , and reader kind of felt discouraged playing the guitar ykyk. Reader then would ignore Akito in the hall ways perhaps distancing themselves from him forever!?!?

YOU CAN DEF CHANGE SOMETIMES AND COME UP W A ENDING THIS WAS JUST A LITTLE BRAINROT OF MINE!!

OKOK SO I LOVE THIS SM OMGS !!! im gonna try to write some personal thoughts that I have, this is gonna be kanade and akito based except I wanna. explore the difference in dynamic yk?? this might lean more towards my preferences, I left a little bonus at the end weheh <3 i hope you like this!! <3

♡ UNCONFIDENT GUITARIST - Kanade Yoisaki and Akito Shinonome x Reader

Kanade:

You had always loved playing guitar, it was one of the many hobbies over the years that you stuck with

However, you did not have that much confidence with it. You always felt like you needed to be better

The one place where you felt free to express yourself is your YouTube channel. You published your guitar covers/songs under your alias, and allowed yourself to simply melt in the music

When you did a cover of a song by Niigo, that was when Kanade found you

She was incredibly impressed by you, after all, it takes a lot of talent to play a guitar and pick everything up by ear

She reaches out to you, asking if you would like to join Niigo. You decline due to your lack of confidence and general dislike of working with others anyway

Still, the two of you keep in touch, and you're one of the first people who gets to hear the tracks she's composing before they're published

She hopes to inspire confidence in you by showing you how she just lets herself go with her music. She doesn't push, and finds you're a wonderful person to be around anyway!

Akito:

You had always loved playing guitar, it was something you picked up when you were a kid and stuck with as you grew older

Playing guitar led to you meeting Akito, a slightly aggressive boy but someone who was kind enough to you after hitting you with his soccer ball-

Besides RAD WEEKEND, you're one of the first people who's inspired him to pursue music! Your love for guitar made him look into things he could pursue in music, and he chooses singing

The two of you grew older, and as you did, your passions for music grew. However, Akito took his passion to performing and the streets, while you kept your passion in private

This frustrates him to no end. You were so talented, yet you constantly insisted against performing. He's tried to convince you multiple times, yet you refuse

Eventually, he snaps at you. It comes off a lot more aggressive than he intends, but his passion has always driven him

Unfortunately for him, his anger discourages you, and you start dodging him in the halls. The two of you are left with thoughts of, "I'm sorry." and "I wish things were different."

Bonus <3

Let's say you're taking Kanade out to town. She usually doesn't leave her house for much, but you wanted her opinion on something for your guitar

While the two of you are in the music shop, Akito walks in, looking for a new microphone to use in shows

He spots you and Kanade, and he's slightly surprised that you're in the guitar section. So, you were still pursuing guitar after all, huh?

His smile quickly drops when you spot him and immediately turn away, taking Kanade to another part of the store

He sighs, grabbing what he needs before checking out as quickly as he can. He's always wanted to fix things between you both, but he always thought you made it clear that could never be.

Kanade senses your tension, and asks you about it. You simply shrug it off, waiting for Akito to leave the store before buying what you needed.

She didn't know what was wrong, or what you were dealing with, but she hoped that things would go well. You deserved all the happiness, after all.

[mightbeorphanedidk]

PLASTERED SMILE MASTERPOST

This is more for myself than anything else, just a record of the progress I made for P.S in case I need it. And also I just wanted to make a masterpost of something

Okay my bitchass didn't even MENTION the fic until chapter 5 was out wtf

First direct mention: Voting on a new title

My drafts are funny + Poll results + My bird got eaten by a fucking magpie

Exam period is over + Chapter 9 is nearly done

My friends worry for me how do i live laugh love in these conditions (reblog)

Alastor what a mouth you've

Chapter 10 posted i hate my dog (lovingly)

My drafts are still absolutely hilarious + Progress on chap 12

Rosie makes a big decision + I get sick

Making fun of character design + I'm getting more sick but refuse to admit it

Internal Dialogue: Do I go insane or not?

I got distracted :( (reblog)

My science teacher assigns me a fuckton of hw + chap 17 is fine

I have to cement this point; My drafts are HYSTERICAL

More sneak peeks, I speak BANGER lines (reblog)

Plastered Smile is my #1 Bae

My beta reader is a BITCH

STILL A BITCH (reblog)

The struggles of being a teen writer </3 (catch up big bro)

My big ass mouth mentions P.S to an IRL friend

Chapter 19 :0 I am nervous

My doc is lagging (reblog)

CHAPTER 19 IS NEARLY DONE! My chap average isn't that bad

Up to editing! (reblog)

How was the story guys

JUST IN! One-off comment becomes intense foreshadowing, author says she doesn't know either

Sigh, chores :/

I'm eating chat is this real (reblog)

"chat what do i do when i accidentally vent my issues into a cannibalistic deer this is so not dattebayo" was i high writing that

Its a long wayy to tipperary, it's a long way to go, it's a long way to tipperary, to the sweetest girl i knowww (its a banger song for the ANZAC hearmeout (reblog)

*GASP* What the hell happened to the cane, orphaned?

I INSPIRED SOMEONE TO WRITE I'VE PEAKED

Editing chap 20 + Sentimental thoughts n stuff

I forgot to say that they reuploaded it moments later

Posted the last chapter, I aggressively play Roblox easy obby 725 stages

nvm (reblog)

im a busy woman what can i say

i can finish this epilogue (i made the masterpost right after that post)

no i cant my life sucks

Pretty Crier (Cryer? The crying? who gaf at this point)

Perspective

Misunderstandings (Old toxic men yaoi)

[sergeifyodorov]

I just reread strange trails and I'd love to know your inspirations for it! Your ideas behind the worldbuilding, the genesis of the plot, all that good stuff if you'd like to share!

the backstory

im a college student and was unemployed all summer. in order to pass the time while waiting for local jobs to reject me i started a crochet project. throughout pretty much the entire month of june. and possibly also may. i would make my squares and listen to the strange trails album. straight through. every day. i may have gone a little bit insane.

but it's okay. i'm already insane.

lord huron (the band who made the album) has like. lore. am i familiar with this lore? no i am not. am i aware nonetheless that there is lore? yes absolutely. if you listen to their discography there's definitely lore -- recurring themes (resurrection, adventuring, magical seductive women, etc), motifs (depends on the album but strange trails is big on flowers, trees, snow, although there is one song that's set in the desert), characters (they keep mentioning a guy called the world ender.) anyHway the point of all of this is that the music is [solid 7.5 out of 10 but it scratches my exact brain itches] and very evocative of the imagery and idea of a deeper world. my favourite off the album (and one of my favourites in the discography) is la belle fleur sauvage, which tells the listener about a long perilous quest for some mythical thing (a flower. also a woman. metaphor), although one of the ones whose imagery i enjoyed the most is frozen pines, which is a little less concrete but invokes images of cold, the side of a mountain, strange happenings, etc.

the idea

those songs are definitely the most direct inspiration for it but unfortunately my process for developing ideas is kind of terrible because it involves less "sitting down and coming up with stuff" and more "wait for a 60% formed idea to smack you upside the head like rapunzel in tangled and her cast-iron frying pan." which quinn and his sad little corpse did.

if you go back far enough in the quinnfic tag on my blog u can see the post right after it Happened. the idea was literally "quinn hughes carries a corpse up a mountain, and horror."

so i take this little piece of grit from which my pearl of questionable moral integrity will be built and i ask it questions. first off: quinn, why are you on that mountain? who is the corpse? is anyone else with you? soon enough petey decided to join him (although quinn is and was always the protagonist/pov character). the body was The Ghost Of Vancouver before it was brock over top of that.

another inspiration, which i realize i'm leaving out, is this

this is artist grayson perry's work "hold your beliefs lightly" from tomb of the unknown craftsman, and this image of a long perilous upward journey towards some sacred place really combined together with la belle fleur sauvage to form the base idea of the world for the work.

and of course why would you carry a corpse up a mountain to some sacred place if you couldn't resurrect it at the end?

quinn

im big on metaphor. if i'm writing something long it has to have a Point to it, some larger theme than romance and stuff (this is mostly because i'm bad at writing romance)(and also big on curses and the like.) and also because quinn hughes asexual barb i never fucked/i never fucked/all my life man, fucks sake. this was also being written right before the peak of Canucks Captaincy Debate, and in our hearts didn't we all know quinn was going to be the one to wear the c?

so it became pretty clear pretty quick that as well as my attempt at writing horror that this was going to be a quinn character study -- and this is where i should talk about my other fic scheherazade.

in scheherazade, auston actually doesn't make a lot of choices -- he tags along, arguing with the narrator/bill, and only starts to take an active role in the way the story is going near the end, when he finally gets sick of it all. quinn, however, is not at all the same kind of person as auston. he's less artistic and more practical; an older brother instead of a younger one; jewish; not nearly so squeamish. he takes an active role in the story from the very beginning, showing up to the base of the mountain with his pack full, both prepared and not for what lies ahead.

the mountain

vancouver is smack in the middle of the north shore mountains, so there's a million hiking trails about, but the one i can most easily think of (as someone who hasn't been to vancouver in several years) is the grouse grind trail, a popular and fairly short trail that the canucks prospects actually do every year, so i knew quinn and petey (both vancouver draftees) would be familiar. i've never actually done the grouse grind, which was part of the reason i decided to kind of. toy with reality. you can't call me out on inaccuracy when it's Not Real On Purpose (although the sign at the 1/4 mark is copied directly from photos i've seen.)

petey and the plot

once i added petey, i knew i'd have to get rid of him -- a lot of the scene ideas were quinn-only, and petey's way too sarcastic and useless (AFFECTIONATE) to engage seriously with the ideas presented to him like quinn would and did. so i needed to divide them up.

the original plot idea from the outline is actually pretty similar up until the end of chapter 6 (the conversation w the ghost), but it differs in a few crucial ways -- one, quinn breaks down again, crying and everything, and two, he actually does go through with the resurrection instead of using his wish to get petey down the mountain safely. i realized around then that this wouldn't work with the quinn i'd created, especially after his argument with the ghost: he's far less focused on glory than stability, less interested in the cup or his contract and more interested in the safe long bet than high rolling. in a cold, wet environment like the mountain it's a lot easier to get hypothermia without noticing than it is in a dry environment, even if the dry environment is several degrees colder than the wet one. and quinn would know that, having seen petey's thin little sweater and knowing his stubborn ass is going to freeze.

so after that it became about hypothermia. i actually had a bit of a writing pause after this because i knew i was going off-outline, so i had to kind of inch ahead until i knew where i was going. but i'm happy with how it turned out!