#i made her main pawn to be like a brother to her and he’s so cute i like dressing him up and buying him new weapons

[kattitude130]

i started dragons dogma dark arisen and it’s pretty good

[fumifooms]

Falin who cares too much and too little - analysis

Been stewing on Falin thoughts for a while, I know I have an interpetation on her that differs from many but I’m jumping into the fray. I think there’s a lot to be said about what we do see of Falin. This shorter Falin analysis I made is heavily encouraged prior reading. This analysis mainly explores her complex relationship with caring and so it’s sort of structured in two halves, with Faligon at the crux of it all.

Falin cares too little :

A lot of people assign Falin a people pleasing mindset and I… Don’t agree. We never see her care at all about people in her town or at the academy not liking her.

We do see her worrying about what people think of her… ONCE. And Laios comforted her, told her they didn’t matter and she should be proud of herself. She latched onto that hard. That’s why this scene was so important to be included during the dragon fight, relationship-defining; it’s always been them against the world. She grew to not care what others thought, to only focus on her close loved ones. No one else matters.

Laios’ words were her world. Her older brother who taught her how to feel comfortable with herself, who told her, you’re great, others are the ones in the wrong to not see that, I’ll always be with you, always be there for you. Older brother who always made great plans, who always knew more, who was better at wrestling to name the dogs, who she has always idolized. Laios who always spoke of traveling the world, to which she always said she wanted to follow. And she would, she’d follow him even if it meant leaving the academy and all she knew behind, she’d follow him to the ends of the world, and that’s what she did.

She didn’t care about showing to her classes or keeping up such appearances, she doesn’t even think of toning down her jumping into bushes when Marcille recoils, etc. She acts like an obedient pawn often, to her parent’s directives and then following Laios around no matter what he decides to do, but I don’t think the motivation is people pleasing, rather it’s being with & caring for her loved ones, and her go-with-the-flow attitude enhances the impression. Not that it’s as simple as that, mind you, but let’s talk about this for now.

Falin is perceived as selfless because we, the audience, have our perspectives revolving around the main people in her life (Laios, Marcille). They’re the ones she’s devoted to and people who care about her back a lot too, but to people like her classmates or the towspeople she probably must have seemed like someone who didn’t care about the people around her or her surroundings a lot, who just went on alone and did her own thing.

What matters to Falin? From what place does her kindness come from? Is a part of her keeping up appearances? And I think that’s the point, the horror of Faligon as well, that we can’t tell just how in control Falin the person is as the chimera (because we are shown that she’s in there, we just don’t know at what degree), that we don’t know her enough to be able to tell when she’s at her most genuine, her most raw. That even if you do settle on none of her being present as Faligon, we have to at least consider it, consider that she may be able to do something like this and have a part in it, brutal and uncaring. That even the lenses we see her through, the people who love her, may be unreliable.

And this is what’s very interesting about her too, she truly is so idealized by people around her as a saint. She’s so good and kind and caring to everyone etc etc etc. Laios, Toshiro and Marcille all see her as the paragon of goodness in the world. More cynical characters like Namari and Chilchuck have more layered opinions on her, the latter finding her somewhat unnerving because he can’t read her well. But then with that one flashback scene we see that… Her priorities are intensely focused on Laios and Marcille, she doesn’t care all that deeply about anyone other than them (+ maybe her parents). The rest of the party is in the same danger here but only Laios and Marcille who she’s speaking to get the special ,ention, and if they don’t cross her mind then of course she’d be ready to sacrifice strangers through a risky teleportation. That doesn’t make her not kind or caring!! Just that greater good isn’t exactly her priority. Any means is alright if the end result is her loved ones safe, it usually takes the form of healing and caring, but we see she’s ready to fight and make dangerous calls too. To me there’s this aspect to her that she isn’t as pure and magnanimous as everyone thinks she is, both in-world and interestingly enough meta wise as well, and there’s something interesting to that.

People pleasing implies a need to be liked, needs for the motivation to be that. A yes-man, etc. But if we analyze Falin, her general kind, smiling demeanor is more a matter of passivity I yhonk. Conflict avoidance is easier, so she’s friendly and hopefully things’ll be smooth sailing. It’s easy to be kind to classmates even if they act wary and rude if you don’t care about what they think either way. Of course she prefers good things happening to people over bad things, she is genuinely kind, but I think people tend to assign her a very grand altruistic way of life when to her the motivation is pretty self-centered. She doesn’t do what she does because she loves them, but because she loves them.

One situation that’s interesting to dig into for her way of thinking, and what I’m trying to get at, is Shuro’s proposal to her. I’ve seen people saying she hesitated because she didn’t feel comfortable saying no even though she wanted to, "I can’t say no, I don’t want to hurt him", something that sounds sensible and familiar, but it’s actually canon in the Adventurer’s Bible that the reverse was the case, that she didn’t feel comfortable saying yes. Because the offer was tempting, but it’d have been a loveless agreement on her end. And it makes sense she’d want to say yes too, like we see with the Toudens, marriage is very much a political strategical economical thing in their village, there’s even a bit on it on Laios’ Adventurer’s Bible profile about dowries, and both siblings were engaged very early. They lived poorly for a long time, it’s an enticing idea to marry rich, to have not only yours but your brother’s needs met forevermore easily, which at one point in their careers was their main worry and goal. Why shouldn’t she accept a life of leisure and wealth handed to her by a lovely friend?

So her hesitance was "yeah that’s convenient for me, but where it’s everything to him and heartfelt I’m able to be detached because I don’t care about it that much… Can I do that? I’m not reciprocating, not saying yes in the way that matters. Can I do that to him?" Very caring even though it’s not what you’d expect, isn’t it?

And central to my analysis, where I’m going with this is, I feel like that’s the thing with her character, that she doesn’t feel as strongly as she "should" sometimes, or feels a different way than she "should", or at least that she feels that way and others say she does. She didn’t mind suddenly leaving the academy, leaving Marcille behind and not seeing her for 4 years. She acted like it was no big deal that she sacrificed herself after getting resurrected after the red dragon fight. And in both those cases it upset the people around her greatly that she didn’t seem to get why it was such a big deal, didn’t seem to care about how they’d experienced her choices.

So it’s a tendency… And it’s not that she doesn’t care, it’s just that the way she measures what’s good for the ones she loves isn’t the same as what they themselves think it is (like Laios and Marcille not wanting to be apart from her). It’s an overt but quiet kind of care, it’s doing things like following them around and making sure they bathe and have a meal, even if that means she has to be dragged into misery too.

So yes she probably would know "not caring enough/the right way" is one of her perceived flaws, and that informs how she tries to handle her response to Shuro’s proposal. Her not wanting to accept like her first gut instinct, is because she’s thinking about reciprocity, about if it’d be right to go into this knowing that they have different priorities and she might not be able to keep up with the type and amount of emotions he wants/expects from her. And that’s a big part of her character isn’t it, having expectations pushed onto her. Her trying her best, but in her own way that may seem odd or even unfeeling. Not unlike when she exorcised the ghost as a kid too, unblinking and matter-of-factly, and not seeming to understand why people stared the way they did.

Even though she answered his proposal only post-canon, she’d been pondering it for a while even pre-canon and the Adventurer’s Bible explanation was released midstory, so I’m hesitant to assign her much growth about her hesitation and what I went on above, since she still didn’t react "right" with Laios after the red dragon fight (even if she apparently doesn’t remember sacrificing herself) and put herself in that situation in the first place. She hasn’t finished her arc on that flaw of hers is what I’m saying, she for sure still has it, but I certainly think her thoughts on Shuro’s proposal shows awareness, both of herself and social.

And awareness is a big analysis key word with Falin, especially here it can be hard not to conflate not caring with not knowing. How socially aware is she? It’s rather layered, because canonically she wasn’t aware of her ostracization in her hometown at all, and we’re not sure if she knew Shuro was interested in her before he proposed, but she generally seems more socially aware than Laios. She tags along on his caravan job to make sure he isn’t being mistreated (though doesn’t ask he get a salary), she catches social faux-pas more easily like in the genderbend magic mirror omake with Shuro, and interestingly enough she’s very good at empathizing with her parents and understanding their perspective. We see when she’s worried about Marcille coming that she does know about propriety and how appearances shape impressions. Being a chief’s daughter must at least have taught her a thing or two on that front.

She never stands up for herself, but when it comes to defending others she worries, strategizes and explains.

And this sort of understanding is part of why I think she’d notice the expectations pushed onto her like I was saying earlier, notice how she makes people feel when she’s careless. But if she changes anything about herself in response to noticing is for her to choose, and generally I think it’s a sort of inbetween of yes and no: that she becomes more complacent but also more reserved, complying but by hiding more of herself passively. She’s not sure wether to accept or reject Shuro’s proposal, doesn’t want to lead him on? She’ll just be taking a while to silently consider it, try to keep things as they are for the time being. The third, less conflicting option. She doesn’t feel heard by Marcille who keeps infantilizing her? Just bear with it. Retract yourself emotionally. Settle for it.

We see that when she was young she had a tendency to not read a room, and I think that’s here too. She doesn’t get why her nonchalance upset others but that doesn’t change that she doesn’t want them upset or hurt, so she tries, albeit in maybe a roundabout way. She always had a hard time deeply connecting with people, often keeping herself some amount of emotionally distant: erasing herself from the equation, from the two-way trade that relationships are and making it a onesided thing instead, where all their needs and emotions are directed towards her but she only lets out a bit of her own show. She takes everything upon her and deals with it and tries not to give others this same burden, though not on a conscious level, it’s just that she’s learned growing up that she doesn’t have much agency.

Like I went into with my analysis linked at the beginning, I think Falin is used to just taking what she can get and not asking for more, when it comes to social bonds. She’ll take spending time with her mother no matter what it is they do, she’ll follow Laios to the graveyards and stick by him even when he’s pushing her away (because he doesn’t want her borrowing his book or "No copying!" or such). Her father was always distant, cold and uncommunicative, her mother was considered sick from anxiety and the exorcism attempts were the main way they spent time together, at dinner tables there were only her and Laios. The dogs picked on her too even if she loved them— And so did the townspeople, maybe that being normal to her at home is why she didn’t notice the ostracization she suffered.

She’s always been the last to be asked about decisions or what she wants, never asked to play with at recess, neither her father or Laios asked before sending her to the academy or leaving the village. At home, in the hierarchy she was considered to be below the dogs by the dogs themselves, as someone they can disrespect. Dogs learn from example and behavior, so this means Falin must have been pushed around a lot, and that the family didn’t try hard to rectify the dogs’ misconception, likely worsened by Laios regularly wrestling with her as a competition.

So for example when Falin showed Marcille food, it was her way to implicitly ask to have lunch with her without voicing that question, without daring to take up space. Someone’s presence isn’t something you ask for, it’s something that’s bestowed upon you, you can follow them around but you can’t ask them to stay or to come with.

She’s used to her needs and wants not being listened to, so she’s learned to have less wants. Caring less about herself, caring less about other people beyond her safe zone, was a defense mechanism in part. She has a sense of learned helplessness too, like how when Marcille came to take her away from Laios, even though she didn’t want to leave with Marcille it felt so determined and unshakable to her that whatever Marcille decided Falin would have to comply with.

And still, it’s the "marrying you would be awfully convenient if it wasn’t that I’d feel guilty for not loving you back, the way you wanted me to when you proposed to me" and the "I don’t regret leaving the academy and leaving you behind without goodbyes but I’m sorry that you’re so much more upset about it than me". It’s the guilt of not loving people back the way they want to be, with the same intensity or fervor.

It’s the autism it’s the aroace of it all, it’s the emotional stunting and confusion but the pit in your stomach telling you you did something wrong again. The no object permanence even for people you love even for 4 years, it’s the feeling like you’re somehow at fault for someone having fallen for you and not knowing what to do with any of it. I’m not joking btw it isn’t uncommon for autistic people to not see their close friends for a long while, not having missed them all that much and for that to be really hurtful for the other if they notice/ask about it. "Hiii bestie! Oh umm you’re uh more emotional about this than I expected, hopefully you won’t feel alienated by me not feeling as intensely about it…"

So… Yeah. I think she thinks of things and relationships in a different way than most people, and beyond "good things happening to people is good" I don’t think she actually cares about people all that much. I’d argue that Laios shows more desire to connect with others and make relationships. And just like with Laios and his own issues with humans, that doesn’t mean her kindness is a lie or ungenuine or worthless! It just means that like, well it’s pretty straightforward really, she’s not all that social and doesn’t see casual bonds as meaning all that much and whatnot. She does want to see people happy, but it’s not as much like… A conviction or goal. She’s too laser focused on a select few people. "It’s not that they’re bad people, they just aren’t interested in humans."

And sometimes it feels like people get defensive about Falin in a meta way too, like if you ever so much as imply Marcille isn’t her whole world or that she isn’t the kindest soul out there then you’re saying she doesn’t care at all or she’s evil. And that’s actualy exactly the sort of vibe I wanted to get through with my analysis above here actually haha, that she does care and she is kind but it’s not in a way that’s quantified or understood in a way that makes people feel comfortable. In a way, that makes people feel insecure because they don’t have the same logic as her, don’t show love the same. And I think this is another stellar depiction of autism, of parts of it that feels unpalatable to many, if I’m making sense. The fandom idealizes her as well, which isn’t uncommon or surprising for the character embodying the trope of the perfect beloved to rescue.

And disclaimer, as I said in the tags I feel like the details of Falin are pretty vibe based when it comes to analysis, there’s absolutely a valid angle where she does super care about everyone always, feel free to disagree with me on the overarching angle of my analysis. There’s enough supporting evidence to tip the balance either way I think, and the reason I’ve chosen this angle is I feel it’s more compelling for the themes in Dunmeshi of idealization and being different, of desires vs wants, and because I think it neatly ties up Falin’s character arc as I’ll go over throughout the next section…

So.

Not feeling as much as she should. And……. Is this not Faligon pushed to the max?

You can’t tie down a dragon. As the chimera, she gets to just not care about everyone else and be on her merry way.

Part of it I think is finding comfort and freedom in the mindlessness, in not having the burden of feelings and connections and a consciousness (despite still ending up seeking those in a stranger, Thistle). Like when she’s dead in the purgatory as well, she gets to just… Hang around and do whatever. Similarly to when she played in the forest instead of going to class in her academy days. That’s what freedom and peace of mind looks like to her. Why she decides to roam post-canon, if only now with the goal to find herself instead, with her mind in tow and somewhere to go back home to.

There’s excellent analytic framing out there about how of course, Dungeon Meshi has a big theme of grief and letting go, and… Falin was always a symbol narratively, idealized by characters and often underconsidered by them despite their love. It was Falin’s choice to sacrifice herself for Laios, she thought it was worth it, knowing that it would be her end. Her resurrection and the process of it intertwining her soul with a dragon’s wasn’t done with her consent, and the subsequent opening it gave her to become a chimera puppet. She’s stripped of her agency consistently, and so… It’s very noteworthy that the final choice, of wether to go back to life or to stay dead, in that purgatory scene, was up to her. And she chooses life, but I do think about her in those fields and how at home she seemed there. Peaceful, by herself in a vast calm expanse she could explore, free.

Personally, I think freedom is Falin’s own subconscious selfish desire. And though to us becoming the chimera is obviously a shackle, I think it felt like freedom to her somewhat, too.

And if you think I’m going wildly off the rails here I want to talk about Laios’ wish of becoming a monster. And to be clear before getting into it, being mentally a monster is absolutely a big part of the appeal for Laios, it’s something that’s consistently referred to, something especially pointed out in the werewolf monster tidbit with Lycion. Right panel is from that, but left panel is from the extra with Izutsumi where Lycion talks about suppressing souls in a beastkin body, the human or the beast soul.

Finding comfort and freedom in being mindless, less sentient, less aware? While being unaware in her hometown might have saved Falin a lot of heartache although perhaps stunted her emotional growth, it’s always been Laios’ curse.

Actively, through his choices, he seeks to grow closer to people, to form deeper bonds, to understand and be undertood, but… On a deep seated level, what he desires is to leave humanity and civilization behind. He has an irrational hatred for humans, born from the trauma of ostracization, being different, being beaten up and rejected consistently through his life. Running away from problems is easier. He wants to be free from being a social animal from a social species who has deemed him the black sheep, he thinks it’d be simpler to just leave it all behind, people and his own humanity. At its core, to Laios becoming a monster is a power fantasy, a coping daydream of "if only I could be strong enough to never be hurt again, the power to destroy anything I want, the power to go somewhere better, if only it was possible for me to never feel hurt again. If only I could be someone, something, that can never be hurt". "If there’s someone you don’t like, you can gobble ‘em up in one bite. If you could fly, you’d be able to leave this village right now." It’s a childhood fantasy, from a deep sense of being misplaced and a desire to be able to stand fearless, thinly covering up resentment that Laios represses.

But you’ll notice, when the Winged Lion is enticing him in the last page, even now with his lifelong wish of becoming a monster on a silver plate, he still cares about his friends. He still has that sense of responsibility to his friends, doesn’t want to leave knowing they’ll be in danger and alone. The offer that his friends may be left unharmed is already good, but Laios also visibly flinches when the Winged Lion offers to specifically care after Marcille and rid her of her biggest fear. Laios’ care runs that deep. Not unlike with the succubus, he resists temptation until he gets reassured that everyone will be okay. But see, what he desires isn’t to stand alongside Marcille until her last days, it isn’t to stay and see how well his friends will live, it’s to go. It’s to leave. It’s to fly away, a monster both in body and mind. He wants to be free from caring here, wants to not have to worry about his friends, wants to just go do his own thing, but for that he needs to feel safe in the belief that said friends will be safe even without him being there to see it, because despite everything else he cares, he does. It’s again that dichotomy about caring and wishing you didn’t, or not caring and wishing you did.

In the end, it’s Falin who achieves that wish. Both by becoming a chimera during canon, and by going traveling post-canon. In the latter, being both free of human relationships as something chaining you while still being uplifted by them, by the knowledge that there are people out there you love and that love you. It’s a theme that can also be connected with Marcille, because she gets anxious over people she loves getting out of her sight, worrying they’ll get themselves killed, that time is passing while they’re away from her. But before she can get to the point where she can both have her freedom and being uplifted by her social bonds, regaining both her individuality and her connections, she has to get a taste of just one at a time. Before they can find balance in her life, she has to see what it’s like to have what she’s never had on its own. Unapologetic freedom, and power.

No one can blame you for not caring enough or caring right if you’re a fricking dragon!!!! You make the rules when you’re a beast and you can just… Fly away. From anywhere, from anything. And if a dog bites you you can just crush it. Instead of being pushed around by the dogs because you’re at the bottom of the hierarchy, you’re now at the top, the one with the power to be heard and do what you want without consequences.

I think she’s on autopilot. I think she’s on autopilot a lot of the time, even before being a chimera, and it’s partly why her will is so weak compared to regular dragons. (Again, read my shorter analysis.) It’s familiar to slip back into the role of following someone around unquestioningly. And that’s what is weaponized when she’s a chimera, that instinct she’s been nursing all her life to unconditionally support, defend and follow someone. Only now, that someone doesn’t matter in itself, only the symbol of it. She doesn’t mind, either way is fine. Her will is weak after all, because she’s trained it to take as little place as it could.

Falin cares too much

She spends all her time caring for Laios and Marcille alternating that none of her care and emotional energy is left for others, including herself. So she had to get relieved of all of that for a bit, becoming the chimera so she could reset and recenter and remember that she, too, indeed, is there and an important part of her own life.

So you’re probably seeing the duality I’m talking about here, Falin is very self-sacrificial but for specific people in ways that they often don’t recognize or appreciate. She cares but selectively, both in people, putting all her eggs in the same baskets, and in the ways she cares after them. She doesn’t care a lot, but when she does she cares a lot. Falin doesn't have a lot of earthly attachments, but when she does, they're her world.

In canon her arc, especially post-canon, is to grow beyond Marcille and Laios. Her caring for her close loved ones held her back from looking after her own self-fulfillment needs. And this is what I mean when I say she cares too much; she could gain from caring more about the world besides Laios and Marcille, both lands wise and people wise. She cares too little, but her arc centers her flaw around caring too much instead. Her pitfalls that Kui highlight over the course of the story, while of course her selflessness is appreciated for how she saved Laios and everyone, on a personal level is shown to be self-effacing and damaging. She’s undermined by Marcille, without the courage to voice her thoughts and wants, she would dedicate her whole life to Laios. And I mean, it’s text, in the response to Shuro’s proposal extra no less. And she’s so laser focused on her most loved people that she’s fine with being callous and risking others’ lives, even.

Post-canon, she needs to leave to find herself, away from them.

Herself. What if she wants to just be with herself for a while.

And this is me reaching but I feel like, not unlike Izutsumi who learns to feel this sense of never being alone, always having someone on your side what with having two souls, the dragon in her would make her consider herself more. She finds it easier to care after other people after all, and in the purgatory fields sequence she takes care to bring the bit of dragon left with her… Not unlike with Izutsumi, having two souls forces you to think about your identity and figure yourself out. Besides being this sort of duo now, where if she wants to care after herself she can channel it to that other side of her too… In meta dragons are symbols of greed, and I think the bit of dragon would push her to want more and listen more to her desires, primal and self-serving as they might be. The dragon soul which warped her human body with feathers and draconic features, her image of perfection marred, her weirdness externalized in a way that’s not palatable. But she doesn’t care, about if her appearance is palatable for most people, she hasn’t for a while now, and that’s great.

Notes & nuance

I’m struggling with the structure of this post, making my points organized, concise and strong at once. It’s difficult to make any statement without going "things are generally like this, but there’s this time that this contradicting thing happened too" or "it’s ambiguous enough that you should just follow my interpretation for the time of this analysis" haha, so this is the pit where I put all the stuff that wouldn’t fit well in other places but are interesting for Falin’s character. This section is pretty separate from the main thesis of the post, it’s just more Falin observations. The post has reached the 30 pics limit so I can’t just pull it up whenever it’s relevant but I really encourage scrolling up to read the stuff I highlighted in her Adventurer’s Bible profile if you haven’t already.

I think with the shy-looking loner type autistic kid archetype, and knowing she didn’t seem to mind others ostracizing her, it’s easy to lose sight of how she was by no means an unemotional child. In all the bits we see of her as a kid she’s bursting with energy and emotions. Canon confirms Laios leaving the village did affect her and make her lonely and she cried a lot, too. She may not be social in the traditional sense, but she was clingy with her brother, and she also never was all that shy about who she was, wearing her heart on her sleeve.And okay. Okay okay okay. Speaking of appearances. About what I said of her not caring about what people think of her, even seeming defiant with the caravan leader… There’s one istanxe of her caring actually, and it’s about how her face blushes easily. I remembered it as being because Laios’ said it and as I rambled Laios’ words are her world, but actually it’s ambiguous. It’s only Marcille imagining up this scenario where Laios says Falin looks weird because of it, there’s no evidence Laios said or thought that at any point. And on the other hand…

Her Adventurer’s Bible says: "5, Lovely Skin. She isn't particularly careful with it, but Falin's skin is fair and beautiful. Possibly as a result, her cheeks seem to flush easily. Marcille's always saying she's cute, and she secretly has a sizable complex about it." The phrasing makes me think the complex she has over her blushing might have developed because of Marcille more than Laios. "Marcille's always saying she's cute, and she secretly has a sizable complex about it." It could be related to how Marcille gets swept away and infantilizes her, calling her cute wanting her to wear cute feminine outfits etc. Again this feels like it relates to Falin’s struggle to be seen for who she is and what she wants to be seen as, her struggle to be recognized, having ideals and perspectives pushed onto her. Here Falin is insecure over her blushing implicitly because she doesn’t like being called cute over it, but that’s not how she wants people to see her. She doesn’t want Marcille to always see her as her 10 years old adorable friend. Like if your friend said you had puppy energy, it can be flattering, but it can also make you insecure.

Here’s a link to what I mentioned about her being uncomfortable wearing feminine outfits. It does seem to be more about comfort than the aesthetic perse, to me. Interestingly the shirt & shorts don’t seem like they show much more skin than her beach outfit, so maybe it’s more about the shirt and shorts being tight-fitting. Like the skirts and heels they feel stifling. Again a bit with themes of freedom and not wanting an aesthetic pushed onto her. So yes just to reiterate, I think this is more about self-affirmation and how her identity and self-image gets shown to others, rather than wishing to hide parts of her body like her blushing etc for people pleasing reasons. Makeup was a way for her to appear how she wants to and feel more confident. It was a way to take control over her own image. She didn’t keep doing it, the narrator stating the process to be ‘troublesome’. Ultimately she still prioritizes her comfort, and it was a lot of recurring efforts to go through.

And on the topic of appearances… A friend once asked me: "Does she really hide herself or not? I keep thinking about "falin is herself first and foremost" (in her Adventurer’s Bible profile) it’s just so. Hmmmmmmmm... I just keep seeing people say she hides her real self from people when I feel like the issue is more about her charitable traits straying too far into becoming flaws but people around her dont realize that..."

Imo the thing is, I don’t think she hides her identity, but I do think she suppresses her individuality for others’ sakes if that makes sense. In the way that only post-canon does she allows herself to go see what the world is like, but that’s not personality wise it’s needs and wants wise. And I do feel like that’s the closest interpretation of canon, she says it herself she doesn’t know what she wants because everything she’s done was always about Laios or Marcille, but she doesn’t change her demeanor or personality for others. But she *will*, like, not ask for things she wants directly, like sharing lunches with Marcille at the academy, she suppresses her wants, doesn’t ask things from people and doesn’t hope for more, hope for better. I don’t think we ever see her actively repress her personality, except like what, being more laidback than enthusiastic but I do feel like unlike Laios with her it’s less ‘appearing stoic to fit in more’ and more ‘yeah i’ll just chill until I’m needed or something activates my enthusiasm’. To which said friend quoted: "to feel like you belong you need to be useful. when you can’t be useful the next best thing is being convenient."

And speaking of passivity… I want to speculate about Shuro’s proposal some more. Shuro and her got along well though we don’t know how much, or how often they hung out, she even saved him from a nightmare. Why did she take so long answering Shuro’s proposal? Was it an effort to preserve or was she really just that conflicted? Procrastination probably yes, but what is the core motivation of itl Considering she ended up saying no to travel the world instead, I don’t think it was as simple as ‘she wanted to say yes for convenience’. Logically it’s what would have been best, but it’s not what she wanted for herself, but it was and still is hard for her to even know what she wants. Probably, since like she states it was a great offer and she doesn’t think she’ll get proposed to again, it’s that self-effacing tendency that yes it’d be convenient and logical, and that makes her want to say yes even if her spirit isn’t in it, because if it’s convenient then that’s more important than her feelings on the matter. Man also… Obviously Marcille is very vocal about how she shouldn’t get with Shuro, but imagine how Falin’s whole perspective on marriage must have felt when her only friend ever is a Romantic with a capital R who gushes about idealized romances and grand gestures and True Love and doing things with fully pure feelings all the time.

AND speaking of passivity!!! How much Falin is "there" as the chimera, just how much she’s master of her actions, is left ambiguous and intentionally so imo, but she’s for sure there & influencing the dragon’s action to some degree. Having a dragon’s foot on her in purgatory that keeps her from moving for sure visualizes how it must have been like, but there’s Falin calling out to her brother Laios, there’s the kind attentions towards Thistle that are so Falin-like, and most explicitly there’s the Adventurer’s Bible stating "Even after becoming a chimera, she has a soul that's as kind as ever", which I honestly dislike, a fantranslation puts it as "Even as the chimera, her caring nature remains" and either way to me it feels like confirmation that it’s her giving those berries to Thistle. Now, wether or not she has the mental capacity of a chicken or something closer to human Falin, no clue, there has to at least be some kind of mind bond between monsters and the dungeon lord, compelling or forcing them to go along with orders, or calling her to him in distress like with the fight on the first floor. But yes, it’s interesting to wonder what it is that a Falin, with her kind soul but without her human mind, would willingly do. On her profile, she’s described as Thistle’s guardian and servant. The power dynamic between the two are very interesting, I already went into how it might have felt like freedom to her while being fake so I’ll reign myself in and just mention it again. She’s still at the heel of someone, only now it’s someone who doesn’t care about her back. Going from being cared for so strongly that it’s suffocating and they would defy death and the world for you, to being devoted to someone who has not one feeling about you besides your utility as a paw . She has all this care to give and to focus onto others and he has none to send back to her and I think that’s part of it. In a way, being left with only her own feelings and a void, without expectations or feelings or ideals pushed onto her, it might have been soothing in itself, and eye opening. But yes the way I think of it, her care for Thistle isn’t unlike the care she gives the ghosts.

Interestingly, the care she extends for the ghosts is sending their soul to a peaceful death, freeing them, of life and any earthly attachment. Take that as you will with the themes of freedom and burden of life and mind, immortality and becoming a warped version of who you were, and such and such.

But going back on the topic of connections and bonds for a bit, I think academy days Falin & Marcille is super interesting bc we’ve never really see Falin form a connection besides with Marcille and even that is kept pretty ambiguous. When was the point that Falin started seeing Marcille as a friend and seeking her out? When was the "I’ll lay down my life for you" point? I’m so fascinated by how she wanted to share lunches with Marcille but never truly asked, only made little "hey want this? I found it isn’t it cool?" gestures of showing things to her… It’s the only way she knows to ask, or maybe it’s the only way she feels comfortable to. In all the scenes of young Falin and Marcille Falin seems comfortable in her friendship with Marcille, but at the same time… I think we see Falin at her most insecure around Marcille, because she really does care about Marcille and what she thinks of her so much, and while Marcille is a bit of an unstoppable force tornado style (affectionate) Falin is something of a doormat. I’d usually say showing her berries was her earnest way to connect and be like "Hey bestie look at this! :]" , but there’s a real possibility that she was self-conscious and holding herself back.

Friendship and Marcille! Involving Laios into this too but, again with the autism thing of not showing you care in ways that others understand, Marcille being very overtly affectionate and clingy was so so soo important… Marcille keeping on hanging out with Falin and caring after her, and being undeterred/unbothered by Falin not always seeming like she cares all that much back in the conventional way, as in Falin acts nonchalant and a bit like she didn’t mind wether she was there with her or not during her outings to the cave dungeon. Caring and being clingy and so affectionate despite that in such a classic Marcille way is soo needed, because so often people will get discouraged by say, their friend not keeping in contact regularly/well, seeming disaffected or as happy-go-lucky as ever even if you haven’t seen each other in a while or when they’re alone, and yes there’s potential for a strong friendship there but someone like Falin won’t be committed enough to reciprocating attention the same way… I hope I’m making sense but yes this angle in particular strongly correlates to autism. And the way Marcille always initiates physical affection, both Toudens being awkward about initiating touch because they don’t know if that’s allowed, if they’re going about the social interaction the right way, if they’re allowed to ask that out of someone…

Another fun observation to make is about the 4 years Falin and Marcille spent apart. Marcille despite being of a long-lived race treated these 4 years of separation with more gravity than Falin did. Falin brushed it off very dismissively to say the least. But then you remember that the amount of time Falin and Laios didn’t see each other after he left the village was 8 years. Double the years, double the time. And that reminder makes Falin’s actions so starkingly understandable. Of course she wouldn’t see 4 years of separation as a long time if 8 years of separation with her beloved brother is her point of comparison. Of course she’d see it as worth it to leave Marcille for 4 years if it meant ending those 8 years instead, especially if she was worried about him (the reason why she followed him into his caravan job).

A friend always says that while Falin is the center of Marcille’s world, Laios’ is at the center of Falin’s, and I tend to agree.

It’s fun to think of how her career dreams had always been shaped by Laios, even when they were kids. Of course there’s how traveling the world began as a dream they talked about and shared, but there’s how he reassures her by listing cool jobs she could do like traveling exorcist, etc. And then of course, she gave up on her magic academy and career path to follow him and do odd jobs, etc etc.

I should go into the violence of Faligon more tbh, because I think there’s an interesting parallel to how she has no problem wacking things with a mace, wether a ghost when she was a kid or a walking mushroom as an adult. Something that often surprises fans when they remember, I don’t really want to get into the whole " Falin hates violence and hates seeing people in pain to an intense degree. ‘If you die do it somewhere where I can’t see’ style’ interpretation, it has some weight but on the whole I don’t vibe with the theory she has a particular aversion to violence, she seems to be fine resorting to it as much as any other adventurer as long as it isn’t needlessly against ghosts. And Falin’s sudden mace hits are fun to me too because it’s not her becoming a berserker when the need arises as much as her becoming active because something she cares about is threatened, and that brings her out of her passivity from 99% of the rest of the time. Thistle included. Falin always could be violent, she just dislikes senseless carnage. The Shuro party vs chimera fight is a bit ambiguous on it, because you can argue she only attached after being provoked, presumably offscreen as well while the ninjas went off to fight the harpies. Falin becomes the most active when she needs to protect someone, she has no qualms doing whatever’s needed for that, wether it be leaving the academy & Marcille without notice no matter the consequences or what her parents think, or teleporting the party, etc.

I’m working on a post specifically pointing out all the differences between Falin and Laios, but yes I think both of them selfishly desire freedom in different yet similar ways. Falin’s dark secret is "Ethics and risks are optional if it means I can protect those I love" like the teleportation, and Laios’ is "Ethics and risks are optional if I can be free of all this bullshit" aka humanity aka his wish with the winged lion.

Conclusion

Flighted birds have hollow bones. With freedom and wings there comes risks and sacrifices.

Tldr: Falin doesn’t care all that much, she’s very go with the flow. For example if someone hates her she doesn’t really care because that’d require her caring about what they think of her in the first place, and she only cares about her loved ones. She smiles, but it’s more a state of being rather than out of active goodness: she’s canonically very genuinely kind, but it’s more out of a general want for pleasantness than active care itself. She’s passive, and softspoken because that’s just how she seems, but she has no problem hopping into bushes or getting heated if something calls to her enthusiasm or calls for action and a hit of the ol’ mace. Her loved ones needing tending or protective is what makes her go from passive to active. That familiar autopilot mode of making someone the center of her world and following their every move is what made her so easy to be controlled as the chimera, even ferociously defending him with her life. Faligon is most interesting to me with the theme of freedom. She’s shackled to Thistle and out of her mind, but there’s also a sense of empowerment and freedom from expectations and society. She spends all her time caring for Laios and Marcille alternating that none of her care and emotional energy is left for others, including herself. So she had to get relieved of all of that for a bit, becoming the chimera so she could reset and recenter and remember that she, too, indeed, is there and an important part of her own life. There’s a way of caring after others that can be selfish, not unlike Marcille being overly coddling and not listening to Falin. In Falin’s case, I think it was so selfless that it ended up looping back around to erasing her sense of self. In losing sight of herself, that devotion becoming neither quite selfish or selfless but a fact of life and a state of nature, muddled by its lack of direction.

She’s sooo used to never being able to ask things out of others, you get the crumbs of affection and approval that others offer to you unprompted and that’s it don’t hope for more don’t ask for more. (Also reflected in how she follows her loved ones around without complain or personal opinions and how she’s not willing to rock the boat and affirm herself in her relationships like with Marcille during canon)

Falin cares so much, so much and so laser focused on her few loved ones that it blinds her and she loses sight of everything else, she ends up neglecting herself and the rest of the world. As Kui puts it, Falin is herself first and foremost. She just had to remember the importance of that.

-

I see her as an enneagram 9, which can be surprisingly accurate and fun to research through the lense of Falin. Excerpt below from this book, but like my god, good way to put it

That’s it, ty for reading. Even if it’s a bit of a mess, hopefully you’ll have gained a thing or two from it. Falin is a character hard to pin down, but it is very gratifying when you find the way that the puzzle pieces fit together right for your own understanding of the story. Fantranslation of the shuro proposal comic by @/thatsmimi here.

Here’s my spotify playlist for her if you’d like

Sometimes love is about letting go, a lesson a lot of the cast needed to learn. Self-love’s important too, and just like with diets we need a healthy balance.

[yuikomorii]

Helloo! I don’t know if you remember me but I sent you once something about Yui in LE and now, after I played some routes, I can confirm that she’s my last fav Yui. 😬

// I have a complicated relationship with LE Yui, haha. I appreciate her for being more lively than CL Yui, but she mostly gave me the ick because she was definitely one of the most annoying LE characters.

I typically don't mind characters that are represented as jerks and upright mean, since you know what to expect from them, but I really dislike when characters who are portrayed as goody-shoes, do such messed-up and morally wrong things.

When I first went through LE, I didn’t start with Ayato’s route, given that I heard from many people about how tough it is and I wasn't emotionally prepared, so I started with others. I didn't like how she talked ill about her lover behind his back (more than once) and how her foolishness caused her to disclose critical secrets to people she shouldn't have and get into more troubles than normal. Nonetheless, I didn't think she was too bad… until Ruki's route, where she convinced the Mukami brothers that Karl wasn't a bad person because he returned their lives to "redeem" himself when we all know he only used them as pawns. But, if I thought THIS was bad, Ayato's LE route came.

~Things wrong with Yui in Ayato’s LE route~

1. Yui tried to convince Ayato that despite the fact that Cordelia abused him, “she only did it because she cared about his future”. And then had the audacity to act surprised when he started feeling sick.

2. The main reason why Ayato didn’t want to trust Richter, wasn’t necessarily his trauma, but the fact Richter actually hurt Yui and, in his book someone hurting his girlfriend is unforgivable. Nevertheless, when his brothers started a scandal about Richter and all ganged up against Ayato, not even letting him express HIS point of view, Yui did nothing but stand there staring. Although, after Ayato blew up the mansion again as a result of reactive abuse, she acknowledged that his brothers attacking him like that wasn’t right, but she still didn’t say it out loud to defend him, when she knew the reason behind his actions.

3. After Reiji and Ruki became Ayato's enemies, she went to them without telling him, which made him concerned, to convey her man's sadness and loneliness. I'm sorry, but this was the dumbest plan ever, considering that it was evident they wouldn't have cared about it, and hearing such a thing made them even more eager to mock and plot his downfall. In the end, despite her good intentions, she solved nothing but made things worse, including being bitten by Reiji, which caused Ayato to lose his mind. Based on the previous events, I'm not shocked he believed she would betray him.

4. The scenes in which Ayato began acting coldly towards her were my favorite parts of his LE route. In other LE routes, after doing or saying stupid things, the disputes were resolved in the next chapter or those actions were never mentioned, but I enjoyed how she was actually humbled here. I love Yui in general, but in LE, she deserved this treatment.

5. I assumed she had learnt her lesson, given that Ayato still cared for her despite his coldness, but then she goes to the Viboras to prove herself worthy of his trust. I liked how she tried to solve something (even if she didn't), but what made her behavior even WORSE was that 1) she justified Ruki giving Ayato a hard time and joining forces with the Church to kill him, and 2) she talked ill behind her lover's back despite telling Ayato the exact opposite face to face. I understand that Ayato didn't act very king-like, but at the same time, no one truly took him seriously or believed in him. Also, idk, but she should have tried to defend him, at least this time, instead of empathizing more with someone who hurt her man—?

Credit to: dialovers-translations on Tumblr

I also find it amusing how LE is the only main DL game with no wedding at all, especially since Ayato was usually the one to marry her. I think he secretly didn't want it in LE, given that he didn’t even think of proposing. :”)

She’s definitely not a bad person though, but she kinda started acting up. I think that’s another reason why I don’t want a new game. I’m afraid they’ll ruin her even more. T-T

[cerastes]

I haven't played the game, can you tell us what Mudrock is like, like her personality and backstory?

The first impression you'll get from Mudrock based on her fanart, is that she's cute or attractive, and probably nothing else. I do enjoy Mudrock art a lot, but part of me feels like there's definitely a lot of potential for more serious art involving her (which exists, in minimal quantities). That's because she's a very solemn character. Mind you, she does have a silly side to her, but it lives alongside this solemn side I speak of. Let's talk about Mudrock.

Mudrock is a Sarkazian warrior that possesses great might and magic both, being a highly skilled spellblade, or, well, spellhammer, owing to her own expertise of Originium Arts (particularly those that manipulate ground and rock) as well as her time in the battlefield. She made her debut on the event Grani And The Knights' Treasure, the game's very first sidestory event, on a cutscene after the very last optional map, where she receives a letter from that story's main antagonist, Big Bob, her sworn brother, who informs her that he's doing alright after getting part of the treasure. It wouldn't be until Twilight of Wolumonde that she'd take to the stage again, where she is not playable and is, in fact, the main antagonist (though not the villain) of the story. Just like Big Bob, Mudrock is ex-Reunion (Reunion being the first part of the game's main antagonist), and she, alongside Big Bob and their respective squadrons, of which they were leaders, deserted Reunion after it rotted from the inside and strayed from its supposed objective to protect and fight for the Infected: They both realized that Reunion had become yet another pawn in the international war games between the bigger countries, and the Infected had become little more than cannon fodder and easily swayed soldiers to Reunion more than the people they sought to protect. Big Bob and Mudrock both are characterized by having a well-attuned moral compass, and this wasn't what they signed up for. They weren't simply lashing out at an uncaring world and letting their rage loose, they seriously were fighting for the freedom and well-being of the Infected. So they deserted... But they couldn't leave together.

Here's the first big important aspect of Mudrock: Big Bob invited her and her Mudrock Squad to come with him, since they were sworn siblings and their squads also got along really well. It seemed natural to walk the walk together, right? Big Bob's plans were to find the Knights' Treasure in the outskirts of Kazimierz, and use those riches to buy land in Columbia, where oppression against the Infected isn't as prevalent as in most other places, and money speaks louder (for context, the Infected are usually secluded into special Infected neighborhoods in other countries, or even executed outright, so while Columbia still oppresses them to some degree, it is leagues better than other places) and the Infected are allowed to own land and businesses, so long as they have the capital. Big Bob then intended to make a business with this money, and then be able to provide housing, employment and profits for his "family" (what he calls his squadmates and close friends), and for any other Infected that needed help.

However, Mudrock politely declined, because the Sarkaz in her squad simply couldn't live a life that wasn't one of blood and steel: Sarkaz from Kazdel are known to live short, fast mercenary lives, and those who see a longer life, can only live in the battlefield. It's all they know. Mudrock knew this, more so the older Sarkaz in her Mudrock Squad. To subject them to a civilian life would be to simply put them in a pressure cooker until they snapped, until PTSD or incompatibility with the lifestyle became too much, until their grave Oripathy claimed them anyway, and Kazdel Sarkaz tend to prefer a end in the field of battle. They needed a leader, and Mudrock was that leader. Not only that, Mudrock didn't want to leave any other Infected dry out there, a sentiment shared by her Sarkaz, who figured, hey, if we're going to keep fighting, we should do it to rescue as many Infected as we can.

So she traveled. Even though Reunion might as well be dead, rotten from the inside, Mudrock took matters into her hands. She knew her scope would never compare to that of an organized movement... But she had to do whatever she could, even if it was minimal in scale.

Twilight of Wolumonde is a whole can of worms and a half, so let me summarize it by saying this: Mudrock fought Rhodes Island entirely because she demanded there be justice for the Infected that were unjustly killed in Leithanien (or, well, that small corner of) in what basically was a mystery novel plot of whodunit. Once justice had been doled out and responsibility was taken, she took what oppressed Infected would be fine with leaving with her, and quietly left. Her stay was anything but quiet, however, as she summoned several Colossi of stone and soil in order to fight. At one point, she even summoned a particularly gigantic one, akin to a mountain, which she proceeded to transplant her consciousness into to 'pilot' it herself.

Afterwards, however, they were hounded by several Infected Hunters from Leithanien, who had the complete advantage in terms of terrain, who kept picking them off one by one, survivors and fighters both. As Mudrock and company finally arrived at the frontier with Kazdel, just one bridge away, she ordered all stragglers and survivors to cross the bridge, telling them that they could eke out a free, if hard-earned and arduous, living in the Kazdel outskirt towns. Mudrock and her Sarkaz warriors, however, would not accompany them, they would stand their ground by the bridge, to stop their pursuers. Mudrock was ready to die. She put it in no uncertain terms, if anyone wanted to leave with the survivors, they could, and those who stayed with her would die alongside her defending the survivors. Her men and women stayed with her. If it meant saving those, even though they weren't many, that was what counted, she'd seen her personal duty to the best of her abilities. She was fine dying in these terms.

Of course, she didn't die: Elite Rhodes Island Operator Logos had come across this little kerfuffle recently and tailed both groups, and then took action to support and rescue Mudrock and what remained of her squad. They fought. They won.

Mudrock and her crew went to Rhodes Island afterwards, where Human Resources struck a deal with her: If she worked as an Operator for them, they'd provide for her and her Squad, giving them jobs in the field as well as Oripathy treatment. Mudrock wasn't initially sure, but a chance encounter with Grani led to both of them conversing initially about Big Bob and then about other stories, and, plus encouragement and endorsement from Folinic and Suzuran (who knew Mudrock from the Wolumonde incident), Mudrock ended up accepting the deal.

Besides her very full, sincere intention to do anything she can for the Infected and her Sarkaz brethren, Mudrock is a bit... Weird. She'll usually go on bizarre tangents about the weirdest things, or simply say strange things with the utmost serious expression. Not random stuff, just actually letting her thoughts drift along with whatever thought comes to mind, in a contemplative manner. She also likes making little clay dolls of people and talking to them, but feels very embarrassed when seen doing this (though it is implied she actually can just talk to the earth). Mudrock is also popular among Rhodes Island logistics personnel (which includes plenty of Sarkaz from the Babel days, the precursor to Rhodes Island) because she'll offer to help them move heavy things whenever she sees them, given that she's both immensely strong physically as well as a powerful caster whose earth Arts make moving things around easy. She also very rarely isn't wearing full armor, meaning that while you likely usually see her like this in fanart:

She actually looks like this most of the time:

In fact, a lot of people in her very own squad didn't know what she looked like. There were rumors about an unknown Sarkaz girl that would wander around Mudrock's camp now and then. That was actually Mudrock in the rare occasions where she didn't wear her armor.

Two fun facts about Mudrock!

The first one is that her birthday is on the 21st of September, which is the International Day of Peace. It serves to reflect that ultimately, what she wants is peace for the Infected and Sarkaz, even if she has to fight for it.

The second one is that her hammer has an inscription if you look closely:

In the trailer for Roaring Flare, we get a good look at it:

"For evil men will be cut off". This is a short form of Psalm 37:9 from the Bible (King James edition): "For evildoers shall be cut off: but those that wait upon the Lord, they shall inherit the earth."

All in all, Mudrock is bundle of love and kindess in an awkward package (awkward in terms of how she socializes, not in that she's shy or anything), but when an injustice is present, she will fight tooth and nail until justice is meted out (as she did in Wolumonde) and is willing to die for her ideals, if it'll save just a few people.

[rains-inky-mind]

Okay! So, I made sure to update that post, but here is the official one!

I have finally completed my first book, THE WAR FOR AMBITION: Part I. You can find it on Amazon as a paperback, hardcover, or digital for Kindle.

Features:

Contemporary Fantasy

First in a series

Found Family

Lost Pricess (with a Twist)

Overcoming mental illness

Neurodivergent Main character

Summary:

Andy Wesley is plotting her own demise. After her twin sister and her mother died in a freak accident almost a year ago, Andy’s life has devolved into nothing but grief, guilt, and depression. With her father’s impending wedding date and their big move to a new city, now feels like the perfect time to do it.

Upon moving to Orange Blossom, Virginia, she finds her soon-to-be step-brother, Xander Merrik, stumbling home covered in blood in the middle of the night. After Andy does some prodding, what he reveals changes everything: there is a whole other world just beyond our own. In this unbelievable world, her twin sister and mother are very much alive. This causes Andy’s suicide plans to come to grinding halt, as she goes in search of her sister with a newfound glimmer of hope—and Xander.

Trying to find her way around the new world, she finds familiar faces and new friends to help her get to her family. What she finds is worse than she could have imagined: her mother, Celia, is heading a war against humans—which Andy comes to find out, she is not—inside their borders, and her twin, Gwen, is nothing more than a voiceless pawn. This comes as even more of a shock to Xander, who has been working for Celia for more than eight years.

✨️Thank you to everyone that supported and encouraged me! I love you guys!✨️

[radiobelle23]

All the KinnPorsche fics that had me in a chokehold - completed recs because I know we all have PTSD from incomplete fics

So here I am after thousands of years of being off tumblr for one reason. KINNPORSCHE. Now if you’re like me and you like to hyper fixate on things, then you know what’s it’s like to spend hours trying the find the best fics to satisfy that boost of serotonin. So here I’ve listed all of my favorite KP fics I’ve read on AO3. Now, I mainly read smut but I do enjoy a little fluff every once in a while so WARNING: I’m gonna list some of the most toe curling, smut filled fics of them all here, some summaries are VERY EXPLICIT. I do read Vegas/Pete and Kim/Chay fics as well but this is primarily dedicated to my two favorite kingpins. Originally this was going to be a complete/incomplete rec list but I then realized it was going to be a monster of a rec page. Anyways ENJOY !

Update 10/1/22: Happy spooky season! Can I just say that I honestly did not expect my little list to blow up like this? You guys all fed into my praise kink, not gonna lie. And some of the authors saw it!?! I am not worthy!!! You all deserve the love!!! I realized I left out a couple fics and I am back to right my wrongs! So any * you see has been added since the orig post date... I might need to make a second list.....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Kings Tree - LuckyDragon

Summary: Kinn was seven when he woke up one morning to discover a small silver circle on the back of his left wrist.

Chapters: 14/14 Words: 78,474

In the Eye of the Beholder - asleepby2

Summary: Rich, the latest recruit to the main family's famed security detail, has no idea what exactly the two dons have going on and he's determined to find out.

- or -

Kinn and Porsche as observed by an oblivious fool.

Chapters: 3/3 Words: 7,883

tiny spark, mighty flame - BeStillMySlashyHeart

Summary: In a world where the touch of your skin with another could reveal your soulmate, Kinn keeps his collars high and his gloves on. What happens when he's not allowed to do that anymore?

Chapters: 11/11 Words: 29,452

A Little Wicked - midnightsurge

Summary: “There is a way to get her off your back,” Kinn seems reluctant to say. “I don’t know how willing you’d be to go through with it.”

Porsche raises an eyebrow.

Kinn sighs and finally spills. “If she thinks you’re with me, she won’t dare approach you anymore.”

Porsche freezes. He stares Kinn down.

-

Porsche never pawns the watch. Kinn never kidnaps him. Somehow they still fall for each other.

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 11,146

Paperwork Promises - surrealsunday

Summary: Filing paperwork and tending to the needs of rich, stuffy executives was never Porsche’s dream career, but a job is a job. That job is made a lot less easy – but maybe a bit more interesting – when the boss he’s been avoiding since that very first day in the elevator, gets a lapful of coffee and an eyeful of Porsche. Just when Porsche was getting used to the monotony of the every day…

Executive Bossman Kinn | Assistant Smartass Porsche

Chapters: 8/8 Words: 80,533

fool me once (fool me twice) - perfumes

Summary: Porsche wondered if any of it was real. It sure seemed real at the time, when Porsche chose scissors to Kinn’s rock, when Kinn looked back at him with such devastation. Such love. It felt real when he’d looked up from the fish they’d caught and said: So kind. Why do you keep your smiles to yourself?

Now, Porsche wore handcuffs again. He left them lying alone in his cell. He could barely look at them.

Perhaps, Porsche had only seen what he wanted to see. Perhaps, he had only ever been a replacement to Kinn. Until the real thing came along.

“I’m going to do what I should have done a long time ago,” he said. “But I need your help. Will you give it?”

Vegas smirked.

-

(Or: When Kinn believes Tawan over Porsche, Porsche asks Vegas to help him fake his and his brother's deaths to escape the mafia world. Years later, Kinn visits a small, private beach and orders a drink.)

[Episode 9 Canon Divergence]

Chapters: 8/8 Words:  30,528

Parallel Love - PrinceHeart

Summary: “Do you take Porsche Pachara Kittisawat as your lawful spouse?”

Kinn’s jaw clenched at that, then he reminded himself why he was doing this.

“I fucking do.”

Or where the only solution to bloodshed, violence and disaster between the two mafia clans, is simple. An arranged marriage.

Chapters  20/20 Words:  64,154

between the sheets - DasWarSchonKaputt

Summary: “And who’s that?”

“Oh. That’s Porsche. He’s Khun Kinn’s live-in boytoy. He’s harmless, mostly. Just a pretty face.”

--

A boyfriend can go so many places a bodyguard can’t. As the threat of a potential leak in their security forces looms large, Khun Korn hatches a plot to place an added layer of protection around his heir presumptive. Enter Porsche, former bartender, current bodyguard, and reluctant fake boyfriend of Kinn Theerapanyakul.

Chapters: 8/8 Words:  70,456

cravin’ - yeetlegay

Summary: It’s only when Kinn is two knuckles deep in Porsche’s ass, his teeth buried in the meat of his thigh, that it occurs to Porsche he probably isn’t that straight.

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 1,847

Trials & Tribulations - rainbowcolored7

Summary: In which Kinn is a renowned lawyer for TK & Associates, as well as a certified bastard, and Porsche is his new assistant who isn't sure whether he'll scald him with hot coffee or fuck him before he decides to quit.

Chapters: 3/3 Words:  26,348

Your teeth round my organs - androktasia

Summary: “Aren’t you meant to finger me?” Porsche asks, breathless, as Kinn smears lube around the rim of his hole. Kinn looks up, pausing his movements, and Porsche shifts slightly, almost unconsciously, as though trying to get him inside.

“Where did you hear that?” Kinn asks.  

“I watched some porn,” Porsche says, and Kinn raises an eyebrow at him, unimpressed. He remembers the kind of porn Porsche likes – shrieking women lying back and taking it from coarse, grunting men. “Gay porn,” Porsche clarifies after a moment.

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 3,148

Weak Spot - tessalane

Summary: Kinn nods and clears his throat. “Yeah, I’m – I’m taken.”

“And who is the lucky one?” His uncle snorts, clearly not buying it. He crosses his arms in front of his chest and scans Kinn as if his nephew would say, “ha, sorry, I was just joking.”

Kinn seems hesitant for a moment, but then he turns around and points at Porsche. “It’s Porsche.” He holds out his hand and fakes a smile aimed at Porsche. “Baby, come here.”

What the actual fuck?

Chapters: 11/11 Words:  35,920

give it to ya like you never had it - mirrorofprinces

Summary: “Porsche is extremely close to signing. In fact, he has a final meeting with the execs on Monday morning. The only condition is that he wants to request his first partner, and it’s you.”

Kinn takes a long drink of his whiskey, sets the glass down, and runs his tongue over his teeth. “So you had to meet with me, urgently, to tell me that a beautiful boy wants me to fuck him, thinking I’d say no.” He drums his fingers on the bartop. “Which means there’s a catch.”

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 7,448

right here beside you, i’m still - P1n3appl3_p3n

Summary: When Kinn gets sick, Porsche steps in to lead the major and minor families. They are grossly in love.

In his five months as head of the minor family, this is his first meeting with other clan heads without the weight and presence of Kinn, and to some it probably appears like blood in the water. Porsche much prefers to sit at Kinn's right hand, but he knows he can manage on his own.

His grin is careless, a careful veneer. Time to show these assholes the minor family isn’t one to be underestimated.

“Let’s begin.”

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 3,869

You picked a dance with the devil, You lucked out - aby01

Summary: Feral alphas are devastatingly violent, brutally vicious and absolutely loyal. To have one under your control means great power. Kinn has been looking for his own for years now.

He just didn't think he'd find it in a mouthy beta that tricks him out of his favorite watch.

Chapters: 4/4 Words:  34,025

Note: this is a A/O/B fic, if that’s not your preference genre then skip ahead... But you should really try anything once 😉.

Make Me Come Undone -  ahdriking *

Summary: Porsche fucked up. He fucked up badly.These are his consequences. Kinn teaches Porsche a lesson in trust, and being careful what he asks for. Unfortunately for Porsche, some lessons have to be learnt the hard way.

Chapters: 1/1 Words:  15,108

give him something to believe in. - Skamtrash *

Summary:  vegas and kinn make a bet to see who can fuck their bottoms better. the couples fuck next to each other to see who will win, pure filth ensues.

Chapters: 1/1 Words:  4,134

The Things We Do For Love - Hissnoiice - A/O/B fic *

Summary: He loves in the way a Theerapanyakun does. Kinn is his father's son afterall, looking after what is his has been ingrained in him since birth.

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 8,021 

If You Like Series

like real people do -motherfleckers

Summary: A series of fics set in a fluffy AU where Kinn is a celebrity singer and Porsche is a bartender in a small beach town. That's it, that's all there is.

Works: 2 Words 20,279

speeding through all of these red lights - foreigncars (lunarsoo)

Summary: “I’d like to work for you.”

Porsche didn’t expect his words to draw such an easy laugh out of Kinn. He can’t say he doesn’t like the sound of it, but it’s a little disappointing that he gets to hear it at his expense.

“Why would you want to work for me, Porsche? You know what I do, right?”

- Alternatively, the one where Porsche asks to work for Kinn instead.

Works: 4 Word: 90,539

What I Would Do - TheObsoleteOne

Summary: Kinn was always in control - he had who he wanted, when he wanted and how he wanted.

Of course Porsche would end up being the exception.

Works: 3 Word: 36,042

note: author does not have a series summary so i placed the summary for part 1 instead. Part 2 is a Kim/Chay one shot that I found cute. Part 3 as of now is incomplete, hoping the author finishes because I really did like this series. I still placed it on the list because part 1 ended well and is worth a read.

Readers Choice - here's where I gush over some authors

Note: Can I just give a round of applause to the following authors for having multiple works ready for me (and you) to spend countless of hours - and I literally mean hours reading through. 

iffervescent  

Note: this author also happens to have all of the sexy scenes from the KP novels translated... just saying 👀....

The power in the taking

Summary: They warned him, when he started working for the Theerapanyakun clan. Forget leadership, forget duty to his people, forget all that – they warned him. Kinn Theerapanyakun, clan heir: obsessed with power.

Porsche should have fucking listened.

Chapters: 2/2 Words:  17,005

Public Consumption

Summary: Porsche agrees to be in a gay porno. Kinn doesn't work here.

Chapters: 1/1 Words:  13,598

and its VEGASPETE counterpart

Brand Recognition

Summary: Vegas wants his top billing back. Pete likes being on the bottom.

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 6,910

Sample Tasting * 

Summary: Porsche wants Kinn to ask. Kinn just wants the answers.

Chapters: 1/1 Words:  10,037

Note: also part 3 of Public Consumption 😉

Intent to Cherish -  A/O/B fic

Summary: A mouthy beta runs off with Kinn's watch. He goes to get it back

Chapters: 4/4 Words:  47,670

Knowing him, knowing you

Summary: They do the threesome thing, every now and then.

Kinn and Tay meet Porsche

Chapters: 1/1 Words:  12,619

Note: Okay so i couldn't resist throwing this Kinn/Prosche/Tay fic in here, so good and so smutttttyyyy

SourwolfZiam

The Crown

Summary: “Your Highness” Porsche greets after opening the door and finding Prince Anakinn standing there. He keeps his voice flat and emotionless as if he was addressing the King or his General. He bows his head for a few seconds, not looking him directly in the eyes as he’s taken to doing the last few months.

Porsche doesn’t miss the way the way the corners of the prince's mouth tightens at his tone.

“Lieutenant General” Prince Anakinn – Kinn – returns, his voice carefully neutral.

-

Lieutenant General Porsche and Prince Kinn are together and in love, until they aren't anymore.

This is a love story.

Korn is the villain.

Chapters: 6/6 Words:  25,752

Mr. and Mr. Theerapanyakun-Kittisawasd

Summary: The life of the It couple in Thailand, billionaire Kinn Theerapanyakun and supermodel Porsche Kittisawasd.

Works: 2 Words:  8,634

fortunehasgivenup

the undone and the divine

Summary: In the aftermath of battle, all that's left is need.

Need to touch, to feel, to be certain that one is alive and whole.

Kinn and Porsche give in to their need.

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 1,587   

but you’re everywhere (yes you are)

Summary: What if Porsche, upon remembering the kiss on the pier, went to Kinn and said that he remembered? What if there was no diamond auction? What if they'd had a different start?

Would it make them any softer?

(No.)

Chapters: 3/3 Words:  92,424

even though you’re not mine, you’ve got that look in your eyes

Summary: "He doesn’t do that kind of thing."

What Yok means when she tells Kinn this: Porsche doesn’t engage in sex work.

What Kinn hears when Yok tells him this: Porsche doesn’t take men as clients.

One day, Porsche is struggling to make ends meet, enjoying the occasional hook-up in the back of Yok’s bar. The next, Anakinn Theerapanyakul is offering him an obscene amount of money to get added to his roster of “friends”.

The money’s good, the sex is better, there’s no way that this can backfire, right?

Chapters: 2/2 Words: 26,805

The One Where Porsche and Kim Are Gym Buddies

Summary: When the Phoenix comes up to Kim at the gym and introduces himself as Porsche, it's only polite to reply. They're both in the fighting circuit after all.

One conversation leads to another and soon they're gossiping about their romantic lives.

Romantic lives being the rich dude who's been railing Porsche into next week and the cute guy that Kim can't help but want to spend more time with.

It's nice having a friend who doesn't know your brother.

Chapters: 2/2 Words: 19,598

Happy reading! I will be making a separate list for the current ongoing fics, hopefully by the time i get started they'll be close to completion. Let me know if your interested in the VegasPete or KimChay list, I dont have as much but still good to spread.

kurtstiel

i'm the one for your fire 

Summary: This series is canon compliant with the exception of Kinn and Porsche being in an established Dom/sub relationship.

It will explore various aspects of a Dom/sub dynamic with lots of bratty Porsche and doting but firm Dom Kinn.

Works: 5 Word: 39,660

gone was any trace of you *

Summary: Kinn is looking at Porsche like he’s seen a ghost.

Porsche blinks and the haunted expression is gone, Kinn smoothing it over with something neutral, but there’s still something fragile at the edges of it, like a crystal figurine balanced on a ledge. Kinn’s body relaxes in a way that’s purposefully casual, tucking his outstretched foot back onto the bed.

“You were in the bathroom,” Kinn says. He phrases it like an answer rather than a question

Or: Porsche left Kinn in their bed with nothing but a note. In the aftermath of the shootout, Kinn can't stop thinking about it.

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 11,097

all of me (is all for you) *

Summary: The water has saturated Porsche's white shirt completely, soaking through the vest beneath. The translucent material clings obscenely to the swell of his pecs. His nipples are clearly visible through the sheer material, hard and pebbled, with the unmistakable shape of the metal barbells pierced either side of them.Porsche’s head jerks up to check if he can still hide them from Kinn, but it’s already too late. Kinn is standing across the room, staring in Porsche’s direction, entire body coiled tight like a spring.Or: While Kinn is away on a business trip, Porsche gets his nipples pierced as a surprise for their anniversary. Kinn comes home earlier than Porsche expected.

Chapters: 1/1 Words: 9,940 

And

Please leave comments and kudos to the authors, they deserve all of the love and more 💞

***yeah im gonna need to make another list...

[headfullof-ideas]

Presenting two more characters and their redesigns in my HTTYD/The Deep story! One is more involved in the story, but the other makes PLOT, and neither really ever interact or connect to one another plot wise to my immediate knowledge in the overall story.

Introducing Savage and Eret!

Savage is not an Outcast and Alvins right hand man, but a true Berserker warrior, serving Oswald and his family for years. But when Oswald the Antagonistic becomes Oswald the Agreeable, Savage starts to grow restless. The Berserkers aren’t at war with the Berkians and surrounding tribes anymore, Oswald trying to maintain a semblance of peace in the dragon-war ridden Archipelago. Savage is a follower, not a natural born leader, but years of peace treaty after peace treaty, and babysitting Oswalds whelps has made him seek out other like-minded Berserkers, planning an uprising against the passive Chieftain. Oswald seemed to have caught on to what Savage was doing, escaping their attempted assassination, and now Savage is trying to commandeer the Berserker Tribe as a whole through sewing doubt amongst the tribe against Oswalds children, and trying to pit the siblings against one another in hopes they’ll simply get rid of the other for him. Savage isn’t good at thinking things through though, especially what the aftermath of his plans to stage a coup or civil war amongst the tribe to try and take leadership might be.

Eret son of Eret is a budding Dragon Trapper, partaking in his father’s business of trapping dragons and bringing them to Auction Markets run by the Grimborn brothers. Dragon Trapping was introduced to Erets family through his paternal Grandfather, with loans being taken from the wrong people, with no money to pay them back leading his Grandfather to Dragon Trapping. With similar habits being passed on to his son, Eret Sr, Eret has been taken on as crew for his fathers quest to pay off the debts his grandfather failed to pay, and his fathers own drunken mistakes. Eret isn’t sure how to feel about it all, his father pushing the looming mantle of Captain on to Eret as his eventual future, leaving whatever debts his father fails to pay before retirement for Eret to try and absolve, with old bedtime stories from his deceased mother and her side of the family speaking of dragons being more than wild animals. Eret’s been grappling with his internal struggles for a few years now, and a sudden interaction with some Archipelagon teenagers apparently riding dragons only rattles his inner beliefs even more.

I decided to go a bit of a different route with Savage in this story, making him a member of the Berserker tribe instead of the Outcasts. There are a lot of elements of his prior design still in this one, but he’s got a lead part in a lot of the early Berserker central arks and plots, especially in Heathers early story, and why she makes some of the decisions she does in Riders and Defenders of Berk, which has a sort of butterfly effect on the way she is in RTTE. He’s not a MAIN villain like the Grimborn brothers, Alvin, Heather, Drago, and a certain someone from the games, more of a small villain and a reoccurring nuisance. He gets his comeuppance however, as he’s not good at thinking things through, especially in the long run, and eventually gets revealed for all his nefarious schemes, and promptly exiled

Eret is a little different to the swashbuckling Dragon Trapper that’s in HTTYD 2, but he’s also nearly five years younger, a little older than Dagur and around the age that the riders were in RTTE. So, eighteen-nineteen-nearly twenty. He’s not Captain of the ship yet, and dealing with a lot of inner family struggles and trying to come to terms with what his future may hold. Generational and pawned off debt is how I play off (Headcanon wise) how he came to be under Drago’s employment in the films, and I’m playing with the setting of the early stages of how that happened here. With his grandfather and father both taking loans they couldn’t keep or pay back, and turning to Dragon Trapping to try and pay them off. Afterall, dragon parts and living dragons sell for a LOT of money. The Dragon Riders throw a bit of a wrench in things though, and Eret ends up being one of their first allies beyond Dagur and someone else in the Archipelago. He’s also a little shorter and not nearly as beefy as he is five years from then, not having the experience to build up that kind of muscle yet. I did this partly because of his age, and partly because Nico Marlets early concept art for him (whose HTTYD art I love and want tattooed to my brain) had him being a little more scrawny, and so I thought that was a nice callback

More characters to come…eventually, as it takes time to draw these, especially with the designing process I go through

[misguidedasgardian]

The White Dragon (11)

11. Kicks of a drowning man

MASTERLIST

Summary: You were counting the pieces on your side of the board, alliances and pacts must be made to level the playfield 

Pairings: main Harwin Strong x Fem!Targaryen reader

Warnings: cursing, medieval and A song of ice and Fire AU customs, targaryen incest, mentions of incest, thoughts and talks about underage marriage. brief oral sex and smut.

+18, MINORS DNI

Wordcount: 3.4 k

Notes: I’m changing something… I said Aemma was six, but I want to turn her to 7, one year older. The twins and Jacaerys are 10, Aegon is 14, Helaena is 12, Aemond 10 as well. Luke is 8, Joffrey a newborn.

“If you ignore our children again Harwin, I swear, I will take them and the dragons and go back home right that second”, you said firmly, and he looked at you like you’d just tell him you killed somebody. The discussion between you and Harwin about what happened in the courtyard continued

“What?”, Harwin whispered back

“You ignored our children today at training, choosing to spur Jacaerys on a fight against Cole’s pawn, Aegon”, you threw on his face, “like some sort of sick game between you and Cole”

“Those kids were being neglected by Cole, he is the heir to the throne”, he muttered

“Unlike our children that are just heirs to Harrenhal?”, you asked bitterly

“Is not about that!” he said then, “Jacaerys is the heir and he is being neglected by everybody, Laenor, Cole, all of them, they don’t give a shit about him”

“Well, you are his father… so…”, you could see his patience with you leaving him, so you sighed loudly, the poor kids were being neglected, you could tell and you’d been here for a couple of days, they weren’t getting the respect they needed. “Let Steffon train him then”, you asked

“Oh right, your sworn sword is it?”, he asked in a mocking tone

“What is that supposed to mean?” you asked then

“He’ll do anything for you, and you love him!” 

“I love him like a brother!”, you answered back

“Well you're a Targaryen”, he said then

“Harwin!”, you called, “He is loyal to us!”, he sighed then

“I don’t want to fight”, he relented

“I don’t want a child that isn’t mine with your blood and everyone knowing it”, you said then, and he looked at you, “being here puts everyone in danger”, you continued, “we are right here were everyone can see us”, you said then

“Your sister needs you”, he whispered, kissing your shoulder

“I need you”, you continued. “Harwin I need you”, you accentuated the “I”

“You have me”, he assured you

“Are you sure?” you asked then, “this is a dangerous game”

“You have me”, he sentenced, “Cole was suspended from being the boys tutor”, he said then, “you will supplant him with Steffon, and he and I will train everyone, all the kids”

“Even my half siblings?”, you asked then

“Yes”, he said

“The Queen will never allow this”, you muttered

“Cole has a record of violence, remember Rhaenyra's wedding?”, he asked then and you nodded, “and now this?”

“Alicent is going to act out”, you said then

“No one can debate that Steffon is the best swordsman in the Red Keep”, you nodded, thinking about what to do next. And then you looked at Harwin right by your side, caressing your arm softly

“I’m sorry…” you whispered, “for always putting you up with trials”

“I deserve it”, he admitted, “And I will pass each and every one of them” 

King Viserys might be playing dumb, like he was the blindest man that ever walked the seven Kingdoms, but it was far from that.

He adores his daughters, he adores the way they reminded him of Aemma, they both were his legacy, the love of his life’s legacy. And watching them both at his side on the small council filled him with pride, their decisive looks, their ideas, their knowledge. His youngest daughter had fit perfectly, showing great promise, both of them together were a force to be reckoned with. 

When he told Rhaenyra to strengthen her claim all those years ago, she understood the need behind it, and got married, and had children. He was happy, and satisfied, but now, she needed the other most important part of being a monarch, or a future monarch at that.

Allies.

Rhaenyra needed allies, at court, and outside of it. And now her sister was here, she, you, were smarter in that aspect, you weren’t even in direct line to the succession of the throne and you had allies, friends. You were a born diplomat, you had bonded with a wild dragon and was the third biggest one in the known world. And when you arrived at court, Rhaenyra’s claim was strengthened tenfold. 

As he watched intently his small council interact and discussed solutions for the latest problems of the Kingdom, he watched Alicent’s grim face looking at the other side of the table at both princesses. 

Another battle front had been opened, the Queen. Alicent was restless, and she took every opportunity, especially after the birth of baby Joffrey a couple of weeks ago, to undermine Rhaenyra and sow seeds of mistrust between the heiress and the court, the small council and the rest of her family. 

He only pretended to be blind, but he clearly saw the breach that was breaking his family apart. He had to mend it. He had to give Alicent calm about her future and the future of her children. Because you were the second heir to the throne. Not Aegon. 

He had to bring you back into the fold, and… he had to unify his family 

Now Alicent had ended Rhaenyra’s request to marry Helaena with Jacaerys, but… there was another match possible inside of the two estranged families. 

As he let out a tired sigh, calling for the attention of everyone in the room, Alicent immediately called the meeting off, claiming he needed to rest, and somehow that is exactly what he wanted her to do. 

. . .

The Queen didn’t like it, she didn’t like the power both of them held together, the younger princess came to change everything, and the place she had made for herself this past ten years was in jeopardy. 

With Larys seated at her table, eating pie and drinking wine, she looked down from her window to the gardens. Where she saw the Strong children playing. Aemma’s silver hair shining under the noon sun.

“The Targaryen genes are Strong”, she jumped when Larys whispered in her ears

“Yes, indeed”, he agreed

“A pretty little thing, you’d argue that no child bared of a Targaryen and a Strong ever had silver hair, but… she slipped through the cracks”

“What are we saying?”, she asked then, “that she is illegitimate?”, that certainly interested her 

“Oh no”, he smiled simply, “look at her eyes… there are my brother’s certainly” he sipped on his cup of wine. “and from what I heard from my visits to the White Hall, they keep each other satisfied, all night long they would…” 

“I understand”, she cut him off, “thank you Lord Larys”

“She is a precious little princess, so young… so… moldable”, she looked at him fearful of his intentions, “she should be put under your wing, my Queen, keep her close to the family”

“You are saying…”

“You should betrothed her to Prince Aemond, since Aegon and Helaena are about to be betrothed now”

The Queen didn’t say anything, she just kept looking at the children playing, chasing each other. Soon the alleged Velaryons joined them, and then… under her surprised gaze, even Aemond and Helaena joined them

“Can we play?”, asked Helaena, and little Aemma grabbed her hand and they teamed up against the boys as they laughed

“I want to be in the girl’s team!” muttered Rhaegar, jumping to their side, as they continued their games, chasing each other

Alicent scowled, her daughter was two and ten now, a young lady, she shouldn’t be… but then she realized she had never saw Helaena smiling like that, she was so happy running around with her sibling and her nephews

Having princess Aemma under her care and tutelage certainly would play in her favor. 

“What about your brother, Lord Lyonel?” she continued

“Well, since he married the prince, not even once he has even looked at another, Lucerys and Joffrey are not his…”

“Do we know? Who is Rhaenyra’s lover?”, she asked

“Not yet”, he continued

“Your brother beating poor Ser Criston, he might as well have confessed the parentage of Jacaerys…”, she tried

“He is a prince consort now, certainly harder to confront”, admitted Larys, “now he can get away with it”

“It amazes me, how the gods reward those who had acted so poorly and committed such offenses”, she whispered, “I wish my father was here…”

“He would certainly put a stop to the princess’ antics”, conceded Larys, suspiciously sipping from his cup. And without thinking more of it, Alicent dismissed Larys and 

Alicent was more than surprised than when she came to her chambers and was called upon the King

“Alicent my dear”, he started with that shy smile, “I’ve been thinking about the future of our children…”

“Is that so, husband?”, she asked

“And I see clearly the division amongst our family…” 

“Speak plainly, husband”, she encouraged 

“I think we should betrothe our son, Aemond, with Princess Aemma”. She certainly didn’t expect that 

“Husband…”, she snapped

“I know she is too young, they will only be betrothed, until she comes of age, of four and ten”

“I agree”, and that amazed him, that she would say yes, “she is a sweet little girl of 7” 

She already refused Rhaenyra’s proposal, and she knew she had to bend her arm on this one. She had betrothed Helaena and Aegon, he will have to marry Aemond, her only comfort was that Aemond could live in the Red Keep, and furthermore, if he was married to the Princess’ little brat, he could be spared when Rhaenyra took the power after her husband. 

“Splendid!” cheered the king, “we should invite our daughter for supper to tell her the good news!”. Alicent smiled fakely

Aemma was a silver haired Targaryen, well, she was a Strong, but a legitimate daughter, it could be worse, thought Alicent, she was young, she could be raised at her liking, her and Aemond’s liking. After that chain of thoughts she breathed more easily 

After the small council meeting, you walked away from the room with Rhaenyra by your side

“We don't need a marriage pact to consolidate our alliance dear sister”, you said. And her face was immediately frustrated. You understood her, it could have been perfect if Jacaerys and Helaena were betrothed, certainly a balm to the political injuries the family was suffering. 

“You don’t want to wed Jacaerys and Aemma”, she sentenced, and you sighed out

“They are practically full siblings”, you whispered looking at her, “and not in a Targaryen way”

“She will be Queen one day”, she whispered back 

“You out of everyone would know how little that means to me”, you answered back 

“The Queen denied me, and now you…”, she said bitterly

“I believe it is better if you search an alliance outside of the family to secure your claim”, you continued your explanation, “from another family, I heard Cregan Stark has a daughter… you don’t need an alliance to keep me by your side”

“but it will make my claim stronger”, she continued

“I know, but I explained why”, you said then looking right at her, “believe me sister when I say this, I only have your best interests at heart, do you believe me?”, she looked into your eyes and then nodded, “do you know where our uncle is?”, you asked then

“He is still in Pentos”

“We should reach out to him”, you answered then, “He doesn’t belong there, Laena doesn’t belong there, we should bring them back, them and their two beautiful daughters, to support our cause”. And then Rhaenyra smiled at you

“We shall take our uncle home then”

“Without Otto Hightower here, his inclusion to the court shall be easy”, you said then. “We Targaryens should be together” , and that left her smiling, and calmed. 

You were invited to a private dinner with the king and Queen, Harwin sadly could not attend, he was on duty tonight, he had been named Lord Commander, yet, it had been ten years, there was much to be done, and according on what he has told you, some Gold Cloaks’ captains had fallen into greed, taking bribed to allow all sorts of depravities. So he had his hands full

the dinner was quiet, mostly they asked about your life outside of court and you  worked on not sounding so hopeful when you spoke about your new found home

“There is a matter we would like to put before you, sweet daughter”, your father started. YOu had guessed this had a hidden meaning under their invitation, but you waited, and now it was here 

“What is it?”, you asked with a shy smile

“In hopes of uniting the house of the dragon, we would like to propose a love match”

“Love match?”, you couldn’t help but wonder

“Between Aemma, and our son Aemond”, Alicent muttered, you could tell she was somehow choked with the matter, this wasn’t to her liking

“I don’t know…”, was this coming from your father? with good intent, not from Alicent? with darker intentions?. The thought of marrying Aemma made you want to cry, “she is so young”, you said then

“They would only be betrothed, until she reached an appropriate age”, explained Alicent

“What about Jacaerys and Helaena?”, you asked then and Alicent almost choked on her cup, “to relieve tension inside of the family that must have been the first match made”, you explained. they shared uncomfortable looks

“We had received the proposal of Rhaenyra, and is not to our liking”, sentenced Alicent

“But this one is?”, you asked then

“Yes, they are both sweet children, that already had taken a liking to each other”, she continued, “this is an offering of peace, to unite our families, to keep the Targaryen blood pure”, she explained 

“I will have to speak to my husband”, you explained, “But it will be of great comfort to me that you had review Rhaenyra’s proposal properly

“We had”, Alicent cut you

“Those two are great matches”, said the King, “we should celebrate. And you felt incredibly relieved, had you accomplished marrying both young princes?

“Husband, we should talk about this…”

“It’s settled”, he said, smiling at Alicent, and then she looked at you like she could have you strangled in the middle of the night

“We should discuss it”, you proposed, “You should bring the matter before the small council, I shall bring it before my husband”

“Very good”. Alicent couldn’t take it any longer and she walked out of the dinning hall. That was a risky move, but you played it and it went well. 

“I don’t know if I’m worthy of this father…” you continued, “of this position in the small council, of all of it…”

“You are my daughter”, he said, “it’s your job as a princess to work to unite the Kingdom, you have done so beautifully…”

“Are you sure?”, you were waning, you didn't know if this was your game to play, but you were committed. 

“You are my second heir” you father said to you, and you looked at him wide eyed

“Father…”, he had never said it outloud, never, you always thought that if the Stranger took Rhaenyra before her time, Aegon would be King before Jacaerys, but your father was claiming you, “Rhaenyra already has heirs, so many children…”

“You are a princess, your sons and daughter are princes of the crown”, he sentenced, “the blood of the dragon runs thick, this family won’t crumble under my watch”

“I’ve received an interesting proposal regarding our sweet daughter”, you began by telling Harwin, as you sat in the bed with your nightgown already on 

“Rhaenyra also proposed a betrothal between our children”

“With whom?” he asked, and you looked at him worried

“Jacaerys and Aemma”, who couldn’t quite decipher Harwin’s face, he only grumbled. They were both Harwin’s children, you thought bitterly.

“If we agree, she is going to be Queen someday”, he then said

“That is not what concerns me”, you warned

“What did Alicent say?”, he asked then

“She wants us to betrothe Aemma to Aemond” 

“So young and full of proposals” he chuckled 

“She is our only daughter”, you cried, and Harwin looked at you with a sad smile

“i know love, I don’t like them either, but I think this is best, at least she stays in the family, as a Targaryen, she had to be betrothed eventually”

“Yes I know but… I always thought she was going to be able to have a say in it”, you continued, “choose for herself a nice lord from somewhere and have some sort of say, but between us there are ”

“They might find love…”

“She is your daughter, aren’t you worried?” you asked him

“Of course I am”, he reached at you and caressed your cheek with his big hand, and moved your hairs from your face to behind your shoulder

“I might say to Rhaenyra that I would rather marry Aemma to Lucerys, at least they are closer in age, but… I don’t want Alicent to feel desperate”, you continued

“What do you mean?”, he asked then, “I thought that is what you wanted”

“A desperate person, more than that, a desperate Queen is too dangerous”, you whispered, “she is the one drowning now, so who knows what she might be capable off, so telling her that we can marry Aemma to Aemond, might calm her down, to secure his son’s future, that way she might not turn so unpredictable”, Harwin looked at you with something you interpreted as admiration, but also, fear

“How… when did you become such a strategist?”, he asked teasingly

“I took a couple of lessons in diplomacy”, you giggled. He growled looking at you with those hunter eyes that you knew so much

“Harwin!” you giggled, as he climbed on top of you

“I’ll give you another daughter, as sweet as Aemma”, he grunted. 

You opened your legs for him as he took your nightgown over your head. And had you naked and whimpering under him in no time. Even after ten years, every time he had you was like the first time, so exciting, so delicious.

“You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever fucking seen, and you are mine”, he grunted, he kissed you but didn’t stop there, he kept going down your cheek, jaw and then your neck. You moaned softly under him, as his big hands squeezed your breasts gently. He kept his way down over your belly, kissing and sometimes biting gently, making you squirm. Until he reached your pussy, he wasted no time in devouring you, making you whine and grabbed at his dark curls, he lapped at your clit as one of his fingers caressed your entrance.

“Mmmm Harwin”, you whined in need

“You are delicious wife”

“I want you inside me husband”, you answered, and he smiled widely as you, raising until his face was at the same level as yours. He entered you slowly but surely, always a stretch no matter how much he took you over the years, and he was always gentle at least at first. You playfully wrapped your legs around his waist, drawing him towards you, he buried himself to the hilt because of it. He growled with a wide smile 

“Are you feeling frisky, wife?”, he mocked, and then he retrieved himself only to thrust into you harder, making the bed squeak under you both for the strength

“Fuck!”, you cursed and he reapeated the actions over and over, fucking you roughly. You didn't know where it came from but it was pleasantly welcomed, your hands traveled to his back, trying to anchor yourself to the reality and not to the climax his actions were provoking you

When one of his strokes touched that special spot inside of you, it didn’t take long to make you cum, your cunt squeezed his cock greedily, and when he leaned in and kissed you roughly, his hand on the side of your neck, you felt him plant his seed inside of you. 

He dropped to the bed breathing heavily, his chest moving up and down, and grunting slowly. He looked at you, thrown on the bed in the corner of his eyes, and smiled at you, grabbing you roughly and you squealed in surprise, and he accommodated you over him, your head resting on his chest. 

“I hope it took”, he whispered in your ear, caressing your back, and you caressed his hairy chest. You never understood why the Gods didn't bless you with more children. If it were up to you and Harwin you would have had ten children by now, but, his seed never took root inside of you again, and that saddened you. Your children were kind, beautiful, smart, and you would have been the happiest with more.

. . .

Meanwhile in the tower of the hand, Lord Lyonel, decided to take a last cup of wine before bed, to help himself sleep. He never realized that it was going to be the last cup of wine he was ever going to have. 

Taglist! ❤️ @tearsarcane @integra1127 @aestmilky @thanyatargaryen @tythaitie @lostinworldofdarkness @voodoogoul @wildmindedbeauty32 @lil-pudd @alicattx @electric-bloo @astaaan-lol @stargaryenx @kaitieskidmore1 @bregarc @lilpnd @jcpenneyyy @janelei @fexibau @ladyoakenshield157 @danielle-leah1997 @lady-ragnvindr @cecilyjmorgenstern @omgsuperstarg @bugheadskid @batprincess1013 @her-fandom-sanctum @holb32

I feel like this was another chapter of adjustment and political schemes, in the next one we will see more action

[tvmigraine]

Random Doctor Who RPG Facts about the Paternoster era

A possible Time Lord is still alive in Victorian England. Running the Diogenes Club is Dame Regina Smythe. The club itself is able to change size, miraculously gain rooms and have its interiors change on a whim, making it appear as a TARDIS. The game suggests they could be a Time Lord who's been chameleon arch'd, but I like the idea that it's an incarnation of the Doctor.

The Artful Dodger was a real person - specifically, they were Sam Swift the Quick (The Woman Who Lived). He isn't immortal but he ages at an incredibly slow pace (basically making him Jack Harkness). He looks after street urchins called "The Raggedy Children" while continuing to do crimes.

There is a giant Labyrinth underneath London. One suggested theory is that it's a dying TARDIS, due to its ability to traverse through history when travelling through it.

Madame Vastra and the Doctor both stopped a Krynoid Pod from hatching in London.

Ada Gillyflower (The Crimson Horror) has her own K-9. Their K-9 is an actual dog that's telepathic.

The political history of Who is further complicated by a wholly new Prime Minister for London - his name is Nathan Fairfield.

There is a female splinter of Scaroth. Her name is Scarlett Valentin and she is both an actress and opera singer hailing from Paris. The book states that she stole her skin from a prostitute in order to specifically appear young and healthy.

A splinter of Clara works for Torchwood - her name is Rhona Austen. It is suggested that she was only recruited as bait for the Doctor, but she is said to be a capable Torchwood member.

Jackson Lake's TARDIS (Tethered Aerial Release, Developed In Style) is available for aerial rides above London. It is now a business run by a brother-sister duo called Henry and Charlotte.

The Silence are a threat in London - specifically there is one called The Revenant Reverand, who uses his position hiding in a church to place suggestions into people's minds.

One of the main plotline hooks they offer is continuing the adventures of Victoria Waterfield, exploring what she did after leaving the TARDIS. It is not what I expected in this book.

Saving my favourite pint for last... there is a Dalek hiding in the criminal underworld called "The Napoleon of Crime". He was pulled out of the Time War following the events of The Evil of the Daleks and is trying to return to the TIme War. After acquiring Cyberman technology (The Next Doctor), he uses it to try and build a Time Corridor and get back into the Time War.

He has two lieutenants - the first is Mister Steele, a partially converted Cyberman who's fighting against his programming. Because of that programming, he is still planning to build a new Cyber-King and convert London, but fights against this so he can remain loyal to Napoleon. The second lieutenant is Miss Lovelace, a clockwork robot that is almost fully human that is entirely devised to be a rival to Steele, all for Napoleon's continued entertainment.

Napoleon also has an alien army thanks to his collected alien wares. On top of Cybershades, he now has Chessmen - pawns in his games that are controlled through Cyberman, Clockwork Robot and other alien technology. He has recruited The Revenant Reverand and Scarlett Valentin before, along with the Borad who is still alive!

Notably Napoleon commissioned the Borad to create a Dalek clone as a form of company - he eventually managed to create Josephine. She has a scrapped, bulky shell made from leftover pieces, being dubbed a "Steelclad". She was originally a woman named Lyssa Marden who the Borad "saved" from a fatal accident, although she does not realise what she's been turned into.

I love this character - he enjoys being a leader of the criminal underworld, especially being a nemesis for the Paternoster Gang (the book suggests Napoleon unconsciously sabotages his own plans because he would enjoy remaining in Victorian London).

Cubicle 7 beat Big Finish, this is way more fun.

[multishipper-baby]

Thinking more about the characters as remnants of despair, and how deadly each of them would be if you encountered them... More info about each under the cut.

Deuz is a member of a powerful gang, Fox is almost 2 meters tall and jacked, and Owynn is Owynn. Their danger levels are self explanatory.

Springtrap's main danger is not even himself, but his gadgets and robots. If you get in his radius, you'll get blasted into bits in seconds. Not very survivable.

Cami will most often not actually kill you, but she'll brainwash you into being a pawn for the Ultimate Despair, which is effectively like dying and will likely result in death soon after.

Usagi, despite her brainwashing, still maintains some of her sportsmanship. If you actually attempt to fight her, she'll beat the shit out of you, but she'll let you live on account of your bravery. Your chances of survival with a broken arm and a concussion are very low, but hey, it's something ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯.

Meg is dangerous because of her poison, which means she's only ever deathly if she catches her prey with their guard down. In hand to hand combat, you'd probably win, so she leaves at the first sign of a physical fight (and calls her brother, so you better start running.)

Towntrap still cares a lot about animals, and you can weaponize that into making him let you go by threatening one of them. If you actually do injure one of his animals severely, though, you're toast.

Both Chica and Bon are better than Meg at fighting, but less deathly overall due to not having a way to kill people indirectly like her poison. Whether you could defeat them or not will depend on the person, but it's definitely doable.

Loon tends to focus on big level stunts for the Ultimate Despair, and thus doesn't tend to waste time hunting random people on the streets. Just don't bring too much attention to yourself or make too much noise.

Eak's function is, primarily, to be Owynn's bodyguard- and so, he usually only kills people who might pose a danger to Owynn, which means that running away is an effective strategy with him and he'll just let you go. However, Owynn does occasionally order him to kill civilians for fun, so if that happens... Well, sucks to be you.

Golden isn't very dangerous by himself: the real danger with him is his brainwashed army. In instances where most of his army is busy and he only has one or two for protection, he's not going to waste time making them hunt down someone random. If his whole army is currently with him, though, he'll definitely send a few men to kill any people roaming around. Again, sucks to be you.

Joy spent most of the tragedy using her platform to spread propaganda, and didn't directly kill anyone (except for her family) until towards the end. So, in her case, the danger level depends on at what time you find yourself with her.

Fred was just enjoying his freedom. He occasionally made chaos when Owynn called, but 80% of the time he was off doing side quests.

Bonnie's main purpose during the tragedy was hacking. It inadvertently led to a lot of deaths and suicides, since he used his abilities to get government secrets and spread despair online, but if you found him on the street the best he could do was call some other remnant to deal with you while he runs away.

Toddy... Is a fashionista. She used her platform to spread despair, but I don't think you can kill people with clothes. She probably has a gun on her, for protection, but she's not one to spend her time running around and getting herself covered in blood.

[hotheadrednecksimmer]

Summer Lovin' - Struck by Love Legacy Challenge - Season 2, Episode 17

Spring came and went with Naomi focusing on her Piano and Guitar and her career. Summer was here and she was gearing up for her vacation with her parents that they take every year. She had been so focused in the spring that she didn't have time for any fun, so every week she was dating someone new.

All of the relationships she had were brief and when they got too serious, Naomi would end up breaking up with them. She didn't want anything serious, she just wanted to feel something other than this pain that she had been carrying since winter.

As the Summer Vacation came, a new passenger was going with them to Sulani this year. The beautiful lady that Kaito had met on vacation. After meeting at the bar in Mt. Komorebi, they talked all day every day and began a relationship. At the beginning of summer, Suzu ended up moving in with Kaito in a home that he purchased with the money that their parents had given him for college. He was stationed in Oasis Springs. Kaito had been waiting to ask Suzu an important question that he felt was long overdue, even though they hadn't been together that long.

Kaito took Naomi with him ring shopping proclaiming that she would be his best man if Suzu said yes. Naomi was excited for her brother but knew in her heart that he would get hurt. Suzu would treat him like Akira treated Maeve and how Gabrielle cheated on Naomi. Love always ended badly, no one ever stays faithful, it wasn't real.

The first night at the vacation home, they got there pretty late to make up for Naomi working late. Star made the family a meal while the others sat and talked at the dinner table.

Suzu: Thank you for letting my brother come along on the vacation. We really appreciate it.

Maeve: The more the merrier, I'm always open to more family joining us on vacation! It seems like our family gets bigger each year!

Kaito: You should see this guy play cards, he always wins. I swear he cheats!

Hiro: You're just a sore loser.

Naomi: Always has been, I once beat him in chess as a child and he cried for an hour.

Maeve: I also remember you telling him that he should protect his pawns instead of protecting the king Nay.

Naomi: Not my fault he didn't understand the rules!

Kaito: It's entirely your fault, you actually cheated!

Naomi: You're the boy who cried cheater.

Star: I remember Naomi beating him as a teen and he got so mad then too, he knew the rules by then!

Naomi smiled towards the kitchen where Star was, she always had Naomi's back for as long as she could remember.

Kaito: I don't recall that at all.

They all break into laughter, they shared a meal together and started divvying up the vacation rooms.

Maeve: Well, I thought I booked the vacation home that had enough rooms for all of us but it looks like I didn't. Star and I can crash on couches while you guys get the bedrooms.

Naomi: No mom, you shouldn't have to. I'll sleep on the couch, don't worry about it.

Hiro: Since I'm the extra body, I'll sleep on the couch.

Naomi: You're family Hiro, I'll take the couch, you have the bed. Seriously, I stay up way to late anyway with my work hours.

The protesting stopped and Hiro finally agreed to Naomi. With bedding all arranged, each of them went to their room and settled in. Kaito and Suzu took the biggest room, Maeve and Star offered it up knowing that Kaito was going to propose this trip, the main reason the family is staying for days and not just one day. Maeve and Star took the next biggest, Hiro took the smallest, and Naomi put her belongings in the closet nearest the living room where she would be staying. Although she was sleeping on the couch, she'd be able to have privacy with the bathroom down here and everyone in their own rooms. Naomi thought it wasn't that bad.

As Naomi was getting ready to lay on the couch and flick through the tv channels, she heard a light cough.

Hiro: You really could have the bed, I feel bad about it.

Naomi eyeing Hiro, why does he look so familiar? she thought. Naomi: Half the time I sleep on my couch in my apartment, I prefer it over beds. I think my back likes it better, or maybe I just like the noise from the TV as I sleep. I'm not sure.

Hiro: Well, there's a TV in the bedroom that works I'm sure. So you could sleep in there.

Naomi: Look Hiro, I know you're trying to be nice and all, but I've already claimed this couch and my butt is not moving.

Hiro stood still eyeing Naomi: Is this not awkward for you?

Naomi: What's awkward?

Hiro: The night that Kaito and Suzu met, we hooked up.

It all came back to Naomi, the sneaking up the stairs to the bar's bathroom that she didn't know but it felt familiar, she had done it multiple times before. It wasn't new.

Naomi cursed under her breath. Her bad decisions finally catching up to her. Naomi's eyes grew wider as more drunken memories came back to her.

Hiro: You didn't remember, did you?

Naomi: I- No, I didn't. I'm sorry.

Hiro: Then I guess that's the regular for you then? Flirt and sleep with strangers?

Naomi: No I-

Hiro: Save it, I don't want to hear it. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since that night. But I guess I was just another fuck for you.

Hiro left Naomi alone in the living room. Naomi turned the tv off and sat in the silence and shame that she felt. She thought that what she was doing wasn't hurting anyone except herself. How many people had she slept with and flirted with that actually wanted something more than just to sleep with her? Was she as bad as Akira, Grace, and Gabrielle?

She buried her face in her hands as her thoughts spiraled, knowing that she wasn't going to get any sleep tonight.

╭┈◦•◦❥•◦ Season 1 | Season 2 First | Previous | Next

[kay-wren]

I'll Come Running - R.C. - Chapter 12

Rafe cracked open every door in that endless corridor. He finally found the room that he was looking for. With a subtle knock on the door he entered, almost scared to disturb her peace. He wondered why he even cared about her peace, she clearly didn't care about his. Not four years ago and certainly not now.

Rafe still didn't have many words for Jessie, but he managed a simple statement.

"If you're going to be here, claiming to be my wife after all these years, then you're going to give me some answers." He sniffled and said coldly looking over at Jessie lounging on the window sill overlooking the water. To Rafe, she hadn't changed a bit, but he could tell she had matured. She still looked beautiful to him, just as beautiful as he thought she was dancing so freely at the Island Club. He wanted that Jessie back, and he thought maybe this was his chance to see if that Jessie was still hiding somewhere in there.

Jessie simply looked over at Rafe, she understood where he was coming from. As much as she hated opening up, she knew he deserved answers. That's the main reason she didn't want to ever see him again, because she would have to have tough conversations. She hated those, and Rafe knew it. Jessie simply nodded in response.

Rafe couldn't believe it was that easy. No snide remark? No snarky comment? No attempt to weasel her way out of it? Odd, but he'll take it.

"Meet me downstairs for dinner. I have reservations for us." He said still showing slight anger. No hope in his voice, but he couldn't have hope until he had clarity.

"What do I need to wear?" She asked almost apologetically, suddenly feeling like a burden. She needed to get her act together. She wasn't a burden, she was his wife, and she wanted what was hers. How could he make her feel guilty so quickly? She knew it was because once she finally laid eyes on him again she would see the hurt she had caused, and like she said years ago, she was cold, but she wasn't heartless. She still had a moral compass that forced her to know that she had some explaining to do.

"You can go through Sarah's summer closet." He said as he stared off and closed the door.

- - -

"You're married to that man?!" JJ screamed over the phone as Jessie was trying to get ready for her date— no, dinner— with Rafe.

Jessie sighed, "Yes, JJ. This is not how I wanted you to find out but... I knew you would."

"Gee, thanks for the warning Jess." He sassed back. "When did you even-"

"It doesn't matter, ok?" Jessie snapped as she threw up her mascara-clad hand in defense even though JJ clearly couldn't see her. She was growing annoyed, but she knew JJ deserved the conversation as well. "We're married and that's all that matters."

"Like... legally? Because you know if this is some star crossed lovers shit than it's not going to hold up in-"

"It's real, JJ. We signed papers. Rafe knows it." Jessie exclaimed with confidence.

The line went dead, clearly JJ was thinking. He had to snap himself out of whatever he was thinking. It made him sick to think that his sister was legally bonded to that monster. He had secretly hoped that it wasn't actually legal.

"Whatever will get the gold back at this point." JJ replied, Jessie could tell he was most likely running his fingers through his knotted hair, tension and confusion clear in his voice.

"Wow, thanks." Jessie said with offense in her voice.

"You know that's not what I meant." JJ argued back in a tone only a brother could.

"Doesn't matter, I'm really starting to feel like a pawn in this little game of yours and I'm not about it." Jessie said louder, hoping Rafe wasn't around to here.

That hurt JJ.

"You know what, you have NO clue how hard it was for me to call you. I knew you wanted nothing to do with Rafe Cameron and-"

"Then why'd you do it, huh?" Jessie sassed. The line went silent again. "Right, the gold. It always goes back to the gold. You're just like dad, you can't let go of something that good even if it kills you trying to have it! Well I'm not like you, JJ. I can quit. I have quit. And I'm going to get this money, make you happy, and then go back to living my life, because unlike you, I actually know when to stop." Jessie finished.

No, THAT hurt JJ. He wasn't like his dad. He just wanted a better life, for Jessie too. This is all he had, and Jessie knew that. She regretted her words immediately.

"Look, JJ, I didn't mean-"

"Save it." He sniffled. "You wanna go home, fine, see if I care. The only reason I'm doing this is because I have nothing else. Not even my sister." He said as his voice cracked.

"Yes you do, JJ, don't be ridic-"

The line went dead.

Jessie had to brush it off. She's done that plenty of times in her life. It was time to have dinner with Rafe, and she couldn't let any emotions get in her way.

She made her way down the stairs in a red silk, cocktail dress with a perfect slit down the front, accompanied by some red strappy heels. Both her and Rafe shared regal exchanges, neither one of them wanting to see the other falter.

Rafe was enamored at her beauty, like no time had passed. Still, he remained stone faced as he watched Jessie glide down the stairs. He clenched his jaw in an attempt to not say what he was thinking. God she was gorgeous.

"You ready to go?" Rafe asked, never taking his gaze off of Jessie as he held his hand out for her with a straight face. He may have been angry with her for a long time now, but he couldn't forsake being a gentleman to his lady. Jessie couldn't help but swoon at the action, remembering all the times before when he acted like a gentlemen towards her. She took his hand and gave him a slight smile as if to silently thank him. They walked to the car that was waiting for them. Rafe wouldn't be driving tonight, probably because he needed security at all times considering the treasure he was in charge of.

Rafe and Jessie rode in silence, neither of them quite sure what to say to the other. Rafe mainly just wanted to wait until they got to the restaurant in hopes of catching Jessie off guard to prompt her to tell him everything he wanted to know. Jessie mainly didn't speak for fear of that exact scenario, she had to remember not to be impressed. She was on a mission, for JJ.

After a short car ride, they arrived at the restaurant, which was just as fancy as the mansion Jessie entered just hours earlier. Rafe helped Jessie out of the car and into the venue, being met with mood lighting like she'd never seen before, a large open dining room, light Bahamian music, and white table cloths meeting the floor. Rafe really spared no expense. Rafe pulled out the chair for Jessie, yet he never cracked a smile since they left for the evening. Rafe seemed... focused. Jessie had to remember that Rafe could play the game just as well as she could. That's what made them so dangerous... so explosive.. for each other. Message received. Game on.

"Anything I can get started to drink?" the waiter asked.

"We'll have the best bottle of wine you got." Rafe stated with a smirk as he looked over at Jessie. "What about you, Jess?"

"I'll just have water please." Jessie smiled politely at the waiter.

"No wine tonight?" Rafe inquired with confusion.

"Better not." Jessie said as she returned the smirk and rested her head on her hand. She knew what he was doing. Trying to wine and dine her wasn't going to work, she needed to stay stone-cold sober for this night. "Besides, I don't really drink anymore." Jessie declared.

Rafe scoffed in disbelief. "Since when?"

"Since I grew up, Rafe." She replied as she took the cloth napkin and laid it flat on her lap, ending her sentence looking back up at Rafe with a serious expression.

"And when was that exactly?" Rafe asked as he knitted his eyebrows together.

"When you gave me no choice." Jessie snapped.

"Oh come on, Jessie. What's the real reason you left?"

"I really left because of you, Rafe. And that's not a surprise to you and you know it. Don't act like you didn't totally screw up what we had." Jessie said with a hint of irritation in her voice. Rafe knew Jessie was right, he didn't press the subject anymore. He simply looked down and nodded in agreement. He unclenched his jaw to speak again.

"Okay, well, uh... how's life?" Rafe attempted a normal conversation.

Jessie laughed, "Life's fine." was all she could muster. That's not what she really wanted to say.

"So what does life look like for you nowadays? Where are you living?" Rafe asked as he poured himself a glass of wine, and poured one for Jessie also despite her previous statement. Jessie brushed off the gesture.

"Life looks like me going to work, coming home, cooking, cleaning, going to sleep, and repeating the same thing every day until I die. Living the dream." Jessie responded sarcastically. "But, hey, I mean I'm sure your life is much more interesting, what have you been up to since I left?"

Rafe just chuckled. "This dinner isn't about me." He calmly proclaimed.

"Then what's it about?" Jessie leaned in hoping to intimidate Rafe.

"It's about you leaving me without so much as a goodbye." Rafe retorted through gritted teeth and an iron fist. Jessie could see him starting to crumble. "We were married, and in love, or so I thought." He trailed off.

"Rafe, this isn't exactly the time or place to unpack this." Jessie explained.

"No, Jessie, this is the perfect time and place to unpack this. Because if we were anywhere in private right now, I would not be able to keep my cool."

Wow. Charming.

"What're you gonna do, Rafe? Huh? Nothing. You know why?" Jessie asked as she leaned in further.

"Yeah, I know exactly why. Because despite all of these years of trying to hate you... I can't." Rafe claimed in a hushed tone with frustration evident in his face as he leaned in closer as well.

"And I can't hate you either, Rafe. So can we please just start out with something a little lighter?" Jessie admitted. Damn it. She let her guard down, but maybe it was just what Rafe needed to hear to get him to calm down, she hoped.

Rafe leaned back in his seat again and spread his legs further apart as if to intentionally take up more room and let himself cool off. He breathed out heavily.

"Yeah, yeah sure." He stated as he took the wine glass in his hand and tried to get back into more of a flirtatious state of mind. "You remember the first time we were dressed up together like this?" He smiled sincerely, clearly regaining the sweet memory.

Jessie looked down at her napkin and smiled as well. "How could I forget?"

[raayllum]

S5 Speculation Theories Post

Because I kept delaying this post since I wanted to see if any of my theories / thoughts about where S5 may lead would change, and the only thing that has is that I feel more firm in my belief about one of them, so here it is: a dumping ground for the various paths S5 could take pertaining the main cast, the mage fam, Sunfire politics, Aaravos, the coins, and Rayllum. 

Mage Fam

Much of my original thoughts concerning the mage fam, specifically Viren eventually stepping away from Aaravos and doubly down on “my life is not worth the cost of freeing him” (whether that’s the safety of the world due to untold danger/destruction, or just for Claudia’s well-being) still hold very true to me. We see Viren wrestle with a lot in season four. In 4x02, he reckons with some of the consequences, opportunities, and desires he’s struggled with over the first three seasons. But we also see his continued guilt over what Claudia has gone through as a result of everything, best seen perhaps in the nightmare-memory he has with the “She is not an asset, she is my daughter.”

While the end of 4x09 showed Viren regressing in some ways in picking up his staff, I think the end credit art with him passing out, the realization that his killer (Rayla) is still alive, and the situation to free him growing increasingly more desperate will push him (and Terry) and Claudia further and further apart. We’ve already seen that Terry has a good heart and that he’s stuck by Claudia because he believed in her reasoning: it’s understandable to want to save your father. However, much worse will happen if Aaravos is unleashed, something that Terry currently doesn’t have much knowledge of, and if he learned some of it, I think he would start having reservations. 

And we see how Claudia is when people don’t agree with her or doubt her methods.

So I think Claudia staying under Aaravos’ thumb post-s5 (re: him being shown whispering in her ear in 4x04, as opposed to any of his other prime pawn options in the intro like Viren and Callum) means she’ll continue to be the driving force behind freeing him, even if Terry and Viren possibly defect. 

I also think we’ll see a lot more of Soren and Corvus, not only because comments from cast and crew have made it clear they’re going to get more screentime, but also because it would give Soren a space where he could express some of what he’s going through now that he had an unsuccessful reunion with Claudia and knows that his father is alive again, because boy, that’s a Lot to unpack. Although not quite developed in full, I was partially right regarding Soren stepping up as the group’s protector in a lot of ways; he’s the moral compass when Rayla refuses, he’s the one who runs to and gets Ezran out safely, he’s looking out for Callum’s feelings, etc. I think we’ll only see more of that as we go on. 

Now onto the kiddos themselves 

Regrouping in Katolis / Ezran

This is largely based off an audio clip of a pleased Soren, exasperated Opeli, and tense Ezran of a future season we got at a con like, 2+ years ago, but I think it’s possible the main group (or at least Ez) will head back to Katolis to regroup for a bit in season four. The Dragang may have decided to switch gears from trying to stop Aaravos outright, somewhat, and trying to focus instead on what they’re going to do if/when after he gets out. 

Given that the Sea of the Cast Out is closer to the border / Katolis and quite far from Umber Tor, coming back to Katolis to discuss politics with the other kingdoms (now calling for solidarity and giving us a Pentarchy update) could be part of Ezran’s arc next season if it isn’t mostly reserved for S6, as well as possibly expanding on his parallels to the Orphan Queen, particularly if he and Callum disagree on where to take things. It’s now been confirmed the other human involved in jailing Aaravos was a human mage and puzzle master, so that could be another generational parallel to draw on for the brothers as well as Viren and Harrow.

As I mentioned in a previous post, season four is book ended by Ezran’s overestimating peoples’ ability to move on and/or be rational about things. We see this with his well-meaning but ultimately painful birthday party for his brother in 4x01, his miscalculation regarding the Dragon Queen’s visit in 4x03 even as his speech demonstrates his ability to grow, and him risking his life in failing to calm Rex Igneous down in 4x09. This is not to say Ezran has no successes in season four, but I wouldn’t be surprised if season five pushes Ezran even further into realizing that words cannot always solve things. If he does have to go to the Pentarchy in a call for solidarity, it would be a very interesting parallel and inversion to S2 Viren, in which Aanya was the high mage’s only opposition and now Ezran’s only ally. 

Speaking of politics, let’s move onto the

Sunfire Side of Things

Given Karim saying “This rising sun may become a falling star,” the fact he’s a mage specifically (and not just a warrior), his deep interest in history, and that he’s impatient in ways that Viren was (even turning against his sibling-turned-monarch figure), I think even if he doesn’t fall prey outright to Aaravos in some manner, he will be playing into Aaravos’ hands. Part of this is due to out of context spoilers from SDCC 2021 that included indications of Janai and Karim having intercut but opposing speeches and more Sunfire elf conflict. We also know, according to the supplementary material of Callum’s Spellbook that foreshadowed Rex Igneous eating a jelly tart, that Sunfire elves also have a light being mode similar to their heat being mode, but it’s used for healing rather than combat. 

The story of the first Golden Knight being one to take down a mad king in another sibling conflict makes me wonder if Karim will eventually win and temporarily topple Amaya, only for him to be more progressively unwell / unhinged until Janai reclaims her throne and defeats him, thus reaffirming her status as queen as an honourable Golden Knight. I’m still hoping they’ll reconcile and I think they will, given Karim’s sympathetic motivations and the fact they still have love for each other, but I wouldn’t be surprised if S5 ends with Janai losing her kingdom. From there, perhaps either Janai or Amaya will be injured, with Karim using light being mode to heal one or both of them and fix some of his wrongdoings. 

The Coins

In my mind, there are three main paths that Rayla’s feelings about the coins could go next season. Now, I don’t believe her parents will be getting out successfully next season. There is already so much that has previously been set up and it seems necessary that Aaravos will be released next season (but more on that later). Additionally, a Q&A confirmed that the stack of four coins in one of the S1-S3 credits was intentional, and that there’s a fourth person imprisoned in the coins. Therefore, there’s an important player that is still with Viren and Claudia and who still needs to be freed. So like I said, I think there are three main options in no particular order of likeliness:

1) Rayla keeps the coins a secret at first from Callum and co., as she doesn’t know what she wants to do with them, and she doesn’t want to be something like a burden when there is already so much going on / feels like she has no right to ask for help after everything

2.1) Callum encourages Rayla to look into the coins even if that takes her away from their current mission (a la “You have to go get that dagger, we’ll find help for the egg” in 1x07 and “You’re right” about the dragon in 2x07) and she goes, leading to some kind of run in with Kim’Dael, the Bloodmoon Huntress she encountered as a child. This could explain the out of context spoiler from SDCC 2021 as to why Callum and Ezran appear to arrive in Elarion on their own without Rayla present, or could.

2.2) Callum becomes obsessed partially with looking into the coins in an attempt to fix everything / Rayla’s problems (because if her problems are fixed then she’ll stay, obviously) in a more intense version of what we see in Through The Moon and for a similar purpose. This could lead to him considering dark magic as Jack De Sena alluded to an interview pre-S4 but in the lead up to the season release, and it has also been alluded to that the only way to undo the coins is dark magic at all. While I don’t think that dark magic will be able to successfully free them (cause it’s a bit too muddled thematically right now) or that it’ll be happening yet, attempts could still lead down a dangerous path, or even Rayla asking Callum to look into freeing her parents for her as, after two years of failing and failing to catch the bag in the first place, she feels like she can’t trust herself.

3) Even with (or without) Callum’s encouragement or knowledge regarding the coins, Rayla resolves to stay by his side and to help them defeat Aaravos / watch over him. This leaves room for them to get the fourth coin and possibly have some failed attempts to get it / free her parents, but also the way clear for the season finale to revolve around stopping Aaravos from being freed from his prison. It also keeps Rayla where she needs to be (by Callum’s side) during a future possession or the like scene, as they wouldn’t waste that set up and the clear light and dark symbolism (but more on that later). 

As of right now, I think option 3) is the most likely as it keeps the main group together for the season climax in the most straight forward manner as well as pushing Rayla to evaluate and choose what matters to her most, especially in wake of leaving Callum and now wanting to stay, and her persistent drive and determination to stop Viren. There’s not much point in bringing her parents back into a world that, according to her, might be ending. 

But for all of this as always, we shall have to see. For the next to last section specifically, I want to talk about

Rayllum

in season five in general. Simply put: I think Ocean is going to be Our Season, for a number of reasons. Even more so than season three perhaps. So let’s get into the reasons shall we?

1) Now that Callum is able to admit to himself that Rayla’s presence in his life is always worth the pain she could bring, and that he still cares about/loves her, they’ll get to start repairing their relationship verbally rather than just through action the way they largely did in S4.

2) Season four focused more on Callum’s feelings 100% (not unlike how S2 focused more on him, only for S3 to focus more on Rayla’s emotional journey) and with the coins as a catalyst, I’m sure S5 will focus more on her in general. This means diving deeper into what she may have gone through during the timeskip as she clearly went through something, what inspired her to come back, and more explicit insight than implication in terms of how she views herself now, even if she know how she views their relationship and that she’s still scared of losing him: “I risked losing the best thing I ever had: you.” 

3) With the confirmation that we’re seeing Tidebound elves next season, it seems a surefire thing that Book 5 is Ocean. This is exciting for so many reasons. The first is that ocean/water is a particularly loaded motif and symbol for Rayla and her shame/guilt complex/emotional issues. The second that this is a perfect stage for Callum and Rayla’s full reconciliation. Not only for stakes and romance as the world possibly ends, but because they both have a drowning motif 

And Callum has a breathing / suffocation motif as well that is also interwoven in his relationship with Rayla in the first place, i.e. he breathes better when she’s around. It was primarily established in season two and I was very happy to see season four bring it back around. 

So it plays perfectly into my Mutual Salvation Theory in which Rayla will save Callum from Aaravos emotionally/mentally from Aaravos, ultimately, and with Callum possibly saving Rayla physically as well (since she can’t do everything alone; Claudia has a tendency of using Rayla’s former plans against her, i.e. threatening a boyfriend for leverage; S4 setting up a question of what Callum would be willing to give the cube up for; this always being their emotional pattern; and why I think Callum being possessed can’t be solely why Aaravos gets out). 

4) Mutual salvation theory / Callum connecting to the Moon Arcanum / Light and dark motif. 

It seems a done deal in some ways that Rayla will ultimately be the one to break Callum free of possession/brainwashing and save him emotionally and physically from Aaravos. This may result in Callum connecting to the Moon arcanum as he re-connects with Rayla over the course of S5 and finally letting the past four seasons of Moon arcanum foreshadowing culminate in a beautiful symbolic and literal bow. This would also allow Callum to reconcile the light and the darkness he choose a middle path, if not the light outright.

The Rayla and Callum as each other’s light in the darkness motif was true even in the previous seasons, although S4 made it as about as overt as it possibly could without stating it outright, gearing up for something truly spectacular in season five. This would play in perfectly with both Callum’s reconciliation of the Moon arcanum / reconnecting with Rayla, as well as Rayla being the “other path” he can choose away from this path of darkness, literally and symbolically. 

Last but not least for this section, a post regarding the theory multiple people have put forth in regards to Callum leaving the group out of fear, although it’s not very extensive as I think if the season does go this way, it’ll be a finale or one episode plot line and I think it ties into the “possession” plot line more so that I’ve already addressed. 

Aaravos

I think the Startouch elf is getting out of the mirror for sure by the end of season 5 since S6 has to give the heroes a chance to defeat him in person and it won’t work (hence why S7 exists). I lean more towards Callum’s possession plot line being fulfilled / finished in S5 as well since it has to be before Aaravos gets out, or Callum will dip then (but that’d be S6 as Aaravos isn’t likely getting out any sooner than the end of S5 I’d presume). I think the Key of Aaravos will be used and/or in his possession by the end of the season as well, given the consistent way the Key is introduced with the Star, Earth, and Ocean primals on display when it comes to talking about secrets or other foreshadowing. I don’t think possessing Callum is a requirement of Aaravos’ endgame prison release goal, merely a means to manipulate him.

Ultimately Aaravos’ speculated release is most interesting to me because it means that everything the core trio and co. will attempt in S5 is inevitably futile. They cannot win and they cannot / will not stop him from being released. If you want more details on precisely how that might go, please check out this tag.

Conclusion

That is it and I am tired and I hope you enjoyed! If there are any other elements of S4 / the show I didn’t touch on in terms of what may happen in S5 that you’d like to hear my thoughts on for whatever reason, feel free to drop them in my inbox! Thank you for reading and happy holidays.

[popfizzles]

Honestly I'd like a refresher on who ur Mario ocs are! Take this as an opportunity to give a brief run down of each of the main ocs in ur mario story

UHH okay but all the art i repost will be. very very old bc i haven't posted TNMS seriously/regularly since. 2019?? so uh you've been warned.

LONG POST AND OLD ART AHEAD.

I've put it under a read more for the sake of everyone's dashboards.

And before I start: I started writing and working on The New Mario Story (TNMS) way back in high school as a joke and it's turned into this huge passion project/stress ball thing for me. A lot of it is arbitrary for no reason other than it made me happy when I made it! So try not to think too hard about it all <:) I know I don't.

anyway the gist of it is Mario is a younger, thin and lanky greenhorn type of guy instead of the experienced older plumber you're used to (perhaps a younger version of the Mario we know, or maybe someone completely different altogether?). He's completely clueless when it comes to the world around him; I wanted him to have the vibe of someone young, booting up their very first Mario game in their life.

[Original Post]

With this new Mario came a new Peach, and a new Boswer!

[Original Post 1] [Original Post 2]

Prince Pitt Toadstool is the current monarch in charge of the Mushroom Kingdom. He's professional and graceful for the most part, but he's also admittedly antsy and more hands-on with his kingdom than he should be. He walks the streets of Toad Town often, and will take trips to nearby towns and cities when there's issues (much to the dismay of his advisor, Toadsworth). He wants to be available at all times for his subjects!!

But, since the Mushroom Kingdom houses a lot of valuable resources and is responsible for so much political power, Toadstool becomes a large target.

Specifically so, his presence is interesting to the Bowsella, the Koopa Queen, ruler of the Koopa Kingdom.

[Original Post]

The two kingdoms have been at ends for who knows however long. There have been wars in the past, fighting over land and resources. There's even been talk of an arranged marriage between Bowsella and Toadstool to merge the two kingdoms together.

Of course, this trouble is all with her subjects in mind! The Koopa Kingdom occupies a lot of harsh crag and volcanic terrain, so resources like food and tourism are hard to come by. It's for the good of her people. The end justifies the means, after all.

I also made designs for the Toad Brigade and the Koopalings!

[Original Post]

There are a few others that are less recognizable, however. My favorite would have to be Saul Toad.

[Original Post]

Saul Toad (or, Saul T. for short) is Mario's roommate. He acts as a sort of mentor to Mario, and teaches him the ropes of what it means to exist in this world.

He's a chain-smoking, retired veteran; who knows WAY more than you think about everything and anything. He constantly lies about his age, and keeps his past to himself. The most Mario knows is that Saul used to work as a castle guardsman. After he retired, he followed his dream of becoming a bar owner.

However, Toad Town is not the bustling adventurer's hub it used to be, and business is rough.

There's also some smaller subplots here and there, about characters I'd want to get attached to Mario and join him in adventures. You can tell I take a lot of inspiration from the older Paper Mario games (and the partner system) the more you break apart these things to their bare essentials!

The most fleshed out one would be about Teal (who is a Shy Guy), and her abusive boyfriend, Edward (a Big Bandit).

[Original Post 1] [Original Post 2]

Teal is in a dangerously abusive relationship with Edward (who owns a pawn shop in the seedier part of Toad Town). She's pretty meek and shy on her own, but slowly finds her voice and stands up for herself with Mario's influence.

Plus you know.

A few other quirky world building aspects, like the topic of blood;

[Original Post]

Or the topic of Mario's brother, or rather, his lack of one.

[Original Post]

And this is just scratching the surface of everything, so PLEASE do not hesitate to ask for more specifics or even about anything I may have missed!!

and again thank you for going through this long ass post my bad i talked for like two and a half hours it feels like HKLSDHJKSDHGK

[draculagerard]

You know how sometimes I send questions I could easily Google to your inbox because it’s more fun to hear a friend talk about their interests than see what the internet says?

Well anyway today it occurred to me that despite having absorbed a lot of spn knowledge through tumblr osmosis, I know basically nothing about Sam Winchester, one of the main characters of the show. Like I feel like I’ve got a at least a vibe of what Dean is like just from like … seeing memes and Destiel posts and stuff, but I could not describe Sam to you. Which feels like a shame.

So what’s his deal? What’s his personality like? What kind of character arc does he go through? Any Sam Winchester hot takes?

HII yes I would absolutely love to talk about him. so basically to explain his Thing, I need to give a little lore drop (bear with me).

Before he was born, his mother made a deal with a demon to let him in her house in 10 yrs. So when Sam was 6 months old, Azazel came into the Winchesters' home, fed baby Sam his own blood (and then killed Mary). Now, this ritual basically gave Sam psychic powers that he discovers in his early 20s, which is where the show begins.

Now time for an essay. Im sorry you ask me about Sam Winchester and I cannot shut up.

Anyway his whole thing is that he is The Freak and that he feels Unclean. And even before he knew it was the demon blood, he was like there is something inherently wrong and dirty about me and stuff. Theres a quote that kind of puts together all the scenes of him talking about that

"I remember looking at this picture of Sir Galahad [as a little kid] , and, and, and he was kneeling, and— and light streaming over his face, and— I remember… thinking, uh, I could never go on a quest like that. Because I'm not clean. I mean, I w— I was just a little kid. You think… maybe I knew? I mean, deep down, that— I had… demon blood in me, and about the evil of it, and that I'm— wasn't pure?" And then he talked about how something that was slowly killing him was "purifying him".

And no matter what he did or where he went, he didnt fit in. Not in his family, not in any of his schools, and not even when he ran away from home to go to college to live out his "normal life".

Personality wise, he's the kind of guy who always can make other people talk about their own feelings, and he acts all sensitive and kind, but also he's a fucking hypocrite because he never tells anyone how he feels. It's very fun comparing Dean and Sam because Dean is like No i Cannot tell anyone how I feel and then spills his guts and then Sam is like Sharing feelings is healthy :) and then takes every genuine emotion to his grave.

More on his personality: Overall he's pretty like sarcastic and bitchy but in a younger brother kind of way. In the beginning he started off very angry and explosive and always jumped headfirst into problems. As the show went on, though, he just got visibly exhausted and tired of being angry and became the full opposite, where he's the one who never got angry while Dean became the angry one.

Also, veryyy important, he is the Nerd One. Like his catch phrases are "according to the lore" and "so get this", both said while looking at his laptop screen, reading through a bunch of stuff. He's the one who does the research and shit.

Actually wait. youre a tma fan. I can explain him very easily by telling you that he's like if Jon was a SPN character. Yk how Jon starts getting powers and it's a horror thing and he has crises about how much he's human and how much he's a monster. Exactly that. And also yk Jon's guilt thing? Sam has that too. Ofc with the human/monster element, but also you know how Jon blames himself for starting the apocalypse but in reality he was just a pawn who actually set off the last trigger? Sam did that EXACTLY and blames himself too. Also the nerd thing lol.

Sam Winchester hot takes? I have literally so many but none of them will seem hot with my curated tumblr. Like saying that Sam's thing about being impure is literally just a metaphor for being queer. Not intentionally queercoded but wow is it fucking queercoded. Oh actually a hot take is that I love late-seasons Sam as well and will defend him to my GRAVEEE.

I have so much to say but no way can I fit it all on this post soooooo... hope that gave you a basic understanding of him !!!!

[fixablebubble]

I’m Team Black for sure for a few different reasons but one thing I can really appreciate about Team Green is the complexity and conflicting feelings I have about the main members. For sure there’s some that I 100% hate and couldn’t care less for [I’m looking at you, Crispin], but wow are they a group that has so many layers and intertwining motives and experiences that it makes discussing them such a fun and exploratory time.

Queen Alicent Hightower: the main girl that I love to hate. I sympathize with her because she’s an obvious victim of the patriarchal society and she was used as little more than a pawn in a game she didn’t want to play (much like her children). She went from being the Heir and Princess’s best and closest friend to the Queen, losing the only real relationship she had because of other men’s ambitions. She is a victim. BUT…being a victim doesn’t excuse victimizing others. We can see how she treats her children as they grow up leading up to now. She obviously doesn’t want to be a mother. She doesn’t have interest in what her kids are doing (Helaena…) or what they want (Aegon…) or their feelings (Aemond…). She cares, now, about duty, honor, and sacrifice. Westeros is a dangerous place, but we’ve seen other families in this time who are close, loving, accepting, and a great deal healthier than what we see with Viserys/Alicent/their children. She’s become paranoid, suspicious, cutthroat, envious, and cruel. She is a product of the Game, and she’s perpetuating that abuse and paranoia onto her children and the people around her. She’s a victim, but she’s also victimizing others.

The Hightower/Targaryen Children: what I’m finding interesting about the three children is, to me, how clearly we can see the results of absent/neglectful parenting. I’ll explain:

Aegon II: immediately it became obvious he’s struggling when we see him drunk and falling asleep at Laena’s funeral. He’s still a young man (I’d argue a child, but this is Westeros, so) and you can see the stress he’s under as the Green’s heir. We can see glimpses of how he’s talked to and treated by Alicent (we all saw that smack), we can see how Vicerys clearly favors his grandsons over his actual sons, so I’m sure that’s been doing some damage. We saw the fear in his eyes when confronted about the “rumors” and how afraid he is when he looks at Alicent, who without a doubt is the source/the one who told them that their nephews were bastards.

Aemond: bullying within families is normal, and I’m not going to say that the pig incident was right, but I’d be lying if I said my cousins and I didn’t tease/mock each other growing up. That aside, Alicent’s reaction isn’t one of “you shouldn’t bully your brother because he’s your brother,” but that they can bully each other all they like in private, but in public, they have to play nice. She didn’t stick up for him because she cares that he was hurt, she stuck up for him because it made them look bad. Aemond wasn’t the only Targaryen child without a dragon, but he was the only one without any actual support and consideration for his feelings. He’s also “the spare,” and likely always in Aegon’s shadow, on the sidelines, always second best. I’d also like to speculate that the claiming of Vhagar and the subsequent fight with his nephews/nieces was a way for him to prove himself. He claimed the legendary Vhagar and managed to hold his own pretty well against 4 others, even if it means he lost an eye, which was a worthy trade, by his own words.

Helaena: (honestly I love Helaena despite being Team Black but anyway) she was done SO dirty by almost everyone around her. We see an obvious disconnect between her and Alicent. Alicent doesn’t care for the riddles and “ramblings” she’s going on, she doesn’t see or care for the messages Helaena is trying to say. People think she’s weird. She’s by herself 99% of the time or in the corner where no one really sees or talks to her (except Aemond). She’s quiet, reserved, enjoying company with bugs rather than her own family who mock and ignore her. Also could just be a trick of the eye or seeing what I want to see but she flinched away from Alicent??? Hello???

With all of this in mind, and knowing what I know about what they do/what happens to them, the Greens, to me, are a cautionary tale of generational abuse and victimization. I can sympathize, but I can’t support the things that they do. They’re characters that I’m interested to see what the show does to change or tell their stories and what will happen in their respective narrative and other people’s opinions on it.

(I’m not saying that Team Black is full of a bunch of blameless angels but when I compare actions/reactions, to me, the teams are obvious.)